#(and realise i was so young
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something something about mentors and cycles and mentors and cycles
#like#what if your memory became so intertwined with my ideals i could not help but to pass you on to those who look up to me#along with what makes my very heart beats and bleeds#(and realise i was so young#so young#and maybe i didn't deserve everything that happened then)#and maybe i could start forgiving myself for who i was then#because now i know i was just scared and alone and thinking i held the world on my shoulders#and now i just want to tell him#breath kid#breath#ace attorney#aa#ace attorney fanart#aa fanart#gyakuten saiban#gyakuten saiban fanart#mia fey#phoenix wright#apollo justice#charley the plant#polly the parrot#yes they're important characters and should be cited#dounart#fanart#art#the cycles and patterns woke me up at 4am once again and refused to let me rest
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some wot sketches :3
#lost all my brush settings so im just experiencing with new ones rip#my art#wot#the wheel of time#wheel of time#fanart#art#wot fanart#lan mandragoran#moiraine damodred#moiraine sedai#young moiraine#staffraine#moiraine smoking as uhhh a treat#its weed ive decided#i lost my fav shading brush and texture overlays SO i will uhh figure somethink out#bear with me#🐻#twot#realising now the last mo's proportions are a little weird IGNORE
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Some of my fav fan arts I did in 2024! 🦂💖
This year I took mental health leave from uni and therefore I spent a lot of time having nothing to do other than draw and put all my energy there. It was difficult not to let it consume me, and I think in future I want to put less pressure on myself. But I think my art has really come a way this year with focus on multiple character peices and more colour :). Hope to keep drawing things I love, and thank you to those who liked what I do this year, really appreciate you 💖
#Man it was so hard to pick just 10. Made me realise I did a LOT this year tho#Like I had a lot of diff phases like true detective and then crash and silent hill etc#Tempted to make another post just for the painted peices I did this year cuz I went out my comfort zone a lot#But I will make another post for oc art#art#fan art#sketch#character art#Saw#Postal 2#Amanda Young#Postal dude#Trevor Philips#Gta v#Cry of fear#simon henriksson#crash 1996#True detective#Rust Cohle#Silent hill 2#James Sunderland#ravenous 1999#Colonel ives#John boyd#Mgs 3#mgs snake eater#Revolver ocelot#Big boss#Jacobs ladder
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What if- what if Wind’s trauma doesn’t register with him until he’s older. What if as a teenager he thinks he’s super cool for going on adventures and fighting and stuff but then the trauma slams into him when he’s older. One day he’ll realise just how fucked up his life was and all the things he disregarded or made a joke about before come back to haunt him. What if…
#squeezing and shaking the blorbo#he may be more mature than some people give him credit for#but he’s still a kid with at least SOME level of innocence#and naivety#like he’ll be like haha I was 12 when I stabbed a big bad man#and then later he’ll realise#‘I was only 12’#‘they made me save their world from impending doom at 12 years old’#all he wanted was his sister safe and sound#yet inevitable events lead him to have to shoulder the world as only a young boy#like fucking hell#he’ll have no one to relate to because when he grows up he won’t have the chain… will he?#he won’t have the others to reassure him that everything will get better and that one day he’ll find peace in his life#because everyone will be gone#and he was too young to understand why they were so careful to make sure he was okay while in each other’s company#the only people to ever understand him are forever gone. Never to be seen again#were they even there to begin with?#in his childhood?#in those sensitive years of his life?#linked universe#linkeduniverse#lu wind#lu chain#wind linked universe
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My day be so fine and then boom i think about branch's past
#i do not like drawing backgrounds 💀#HE WAS SO YOUNG WHEN HIS GRANDMA DIED#AND THERE WAS NO ONE TAKING CARE OF HIM#him having a hug time bracelet my mind immediately went to angst#how must it have felt to hear the bracelet ping and you look around and then you realise you're all alone.#i feel like that's a big reason why he stopped wearing it because it would just remind him every hour that he is on his own#sorry for rambling but everytime i think about branch i go insane#dreamworks trolls#trolls#trolls branch#trolls rosiepuff#kei's art
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why am I only now realising that alec was BARELY TWENTY when he became a father.... omg... and it was barely two years into his and magnus' relationship too..... congrats to alec lightwood for defying stereotypes and proving that men can also have unplanned babies at age twenty with a far older man. that's so lana del rey of him
#he's a teen mom someone get him on mtv#i seriously dont know how i never realised quite how young he was. or maybe its bc im 22 now#so while this maybe sounded somewhat reasonable four years ago it's absolutely diabolical now#personal#vic reads tec#tlbotw#tec#tsc#the shadowhunter chronicles#the eldest curses#alec lightwood#malec#the mortal instruments
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Sometimes Severus comes up to Minerva. Right up behind her when she's busy. He'll stand there for a good minute as she works on marking assignments and cursing the boy's youthful energy and brilliant eyes- both of which directly responsible for his finishing his work in half the time it takes her.
"What is it, Severus?" Minerva sighs. Might as well get the obligatory nonsense over and done with, she was due a dose of Severus's antics by now (Merlin forbid he go more than three days without bothering her with nonsensical questions or infuriating wit).
"Am I ugly, Minerva?" he asked. Never there was a being with such innocence in their voice.
Minerva took a moment to take in a breath and silently call on all her patience and all her strength. "Yes, very." Her tone was blunter than the knives used to decorate at Halloween- an incident with some particularly idiotic third years had them ban anything sharper than the corners of a book during the Halloween celebrations.
Severus gasped as if stabbed. "What? Minerva, I thought we were friends!"
Minerva snorted. "Any time we interact, it's completely against my will."
"Minerva! you lie so shamelessly it shocks me." Severus made as if to swoon, a hand clutching the right of his chest.
"You must be shocked; your heart isn't where it should be."
Honestly, Minerva had to admire the fact that the insolent little kitten did not falter in his dramatics with her pointing out the key flaw in his act. If anything, he seemed to be encouraged.
"Ay! The pain of the shock, it has spread throughout my chest! Ah, I cannot breathe!" Severus swayed on his feet, leaning against the chair that Minerva was sitting in. "Oh, how your lie shocks me!"
"Well, then, you had better tell me what exactly I lied about," Minerva said briskly, "before you gasp all the air out of your skinny little lungs, laddie."
"You said," the boy said, a sudden glint in his eye and none of the apparent weakness, standing to face her and one of those long, delicate fingers pointed straight at her, "you said, that our interactions are without your will."
"That is no lie, what part of this looks like it's my will?" Minerva replied, knowing full well she wasn't going to appreciate the cheeky answer Severus had prepared for her.
"Why, the part where you remain for my company, mother," Severus replied, his voice light. "Surely, if you didn't want this, you would have, in your infinite wisdom, simply have employed your great power and assumed your famous feline form and just walked away from me."
Minerva fought her smile. His cheek was infuriating while his logic impeccable. "Perhaps I am simply conversing my energy, you arrogant wee rascal."
"You? Too lazy to avoid a nuisance?" Severus scoffed. "Minerva, you wound me. Don't you know how I know you? You've done much more to avoid the mildest of annoyances, do you truly think I believe that you are here against your will merely to converse your energy?"
Minerva let him see the flicker of a smile disgusted as a smirk, letting the bothersome raven have a little treat for his cleverness, hinting to him that he had essentially won this particular argument. "At my age you no longer have the patience to waste on annoyances. You learn to value your peace. You will understand that some day, I hope, little one."
"And if I die, my hair still black and my skin still smooth?"
Merlin, did the child have a turn towards the morbid. Minerva ignored the voice in her that told her that this would have been a retort of her own had she been in a similar conversation.
"Then you'll die a fool."
"A fool, perhaps, but my funeral will be the biggest," he replied, moving to sit on her desk and grabbing the biscuit jar. Minerva intercepted, lifting it from his grip and replacing it with a towel. His protests died in his confusion at the towel, and Minerva huffed and began to wipe his hands as if he was a child. She did not trust him to correctly clean his hands after handling goodness knows what when experimenting with his potions and she didn't care if he knew it.
"Aye, and how did you figure that?" she asked.
"Surely if I die young, I shall be the first. Therefore you all will be part of the funeral-"
"What makes you think I would want to attend your funeral, you little rascal?" She let go of his hands, almost satisfied that they weren't contaminated.
Severus ignored her and instead took a biscuit from the jar. "You will all be there, therefore I will have the biggest funeral. If I die old, you all shall be gone, so my funeral will be the smallest."
Minerva tried not to think of how depressing that sounded, how lonely it seemed. For a brief moment she felt guilty for being so old and he so young. She involuntarily could see him in her mind's eye, going through their funerals until he stood alone. She and the others- Rolanda, Pomona, Poppy, even Fillus and Hagrid- they were all of an age, weren't they? They could expect their lives to reach the end around the same time, surely? Severus was but a child next to them, he'd stand alone one day.
Minerva tried to ignore the ache in her chest at the thought of him standing alone. Merlin, no. He was far too young. No.
"You truly are besotted with the morbid and the miserable, you melanchonic masochist," she said, her tone just a trifle too sharp to be a simple retort.
Severus paused, swallowing the biscuit. Then he answered. "Ah, but the morbid is much more fascinating, the forbidden has a certain thrill, dear mother." His voice was a little softer, and his fingers, slightly coated in crumbs, were gentle when he tapped her forehead. He was sorry he upset her.
"You and your thrills," Minerva scolded, "yet you cannot even eat a biscuit without making a mess of yourself." Yet even as she spoke, the hand that she used to swipe the crumbs away, was gentle, almost tender, in its movement. She had quite forgiven him.
How could she remain angry? At this boy who looked at her with a scowl of indignation yet whose deep, dark eyes twinkled with mischief and cleverness and brilliance, who stood taller than her, yes, yet was far more delicate in his build than she had ever been, whose hair was as dark as hers had been in her youth, carelessly falling across his forehead. No, she could not remain angry.
If only he had been in Gryffindor, perhaps then she would have noticed him sooner. Or rather, if only her eyes didn't only open for her Gryffindors. How this boy could ever look at her without resentment and anger, she didn't know. Then again, he had been so incredibly isolated and lonely, was it any wonder he let go of his rightful grudges and instead accepted her friendship?
Minerva blinked as if soot from the fireplace got in her eyes. She didn't want him to notice the tears that almost inevitably formed whenever she thought about him. Who would have thought that she'd cry so much for the little devil?
"I'll leave you to your work, dear mother," Severus said cheerfully, hopping off her desk.
"Aye, after you've cleared out my biscuit jar, you villain" Minerva grumbled, looking into the empty jar. Severus shrugged.
"You ought to see it as a compliment towards your taste, really," Severus said. "But I see I have taken the last of your patience"- for indeed, Minerva looked ready to strangle him- "so I shall take my leave. Good night, my good Headmistress, and may you have peace in the silver embrace of the moon!"
And with a laughing twinkle in his eye and a boyish bow, Severus Snape left the room.
Minerva sighed. She wasn't sure if it was out of relief, or because she may have felt some sorrow at his departure.
The door opened again, and a rather meek Severus poked his head in.
"Er, Minerva?" he asked.
"Yes, Severus?"
"Er." Severus stepped in, looking away from her, walking with the awkward gait of a newborn foal, and the nervousness of a deer. "Er, Minerva?"
"Yes, Severus?"
"Am I really ugly, mother?" His voice was a whisper. His raven hair curtained his face, hiding his shame at asking such a pathetic question, and his fingers picked at one of the cuticles of a nail.
Minerva smiled, and walked to him. Softly she brushed the boy's hair out of his face and gently tucked it behind his ear.
"Only as long as you let yourself believe it, dear heart."
#severus snape#pro snape#professor severus snape#minerva mcgonagall#professor mcgonagall#right this was supposed to be a silly piece where snape simply asks minerva if she thinks he's ugly she says yes (messing with each other)#only for him to come back later all insecure and her being like “ofc you arent ugly”#but somehow it got blended with my lther thought of her and sev having a conversation#where sev essentially jokes about dying young refusing to die last#a sort of dark irony if you will because he did in fact die young#a conversation minerva recalls after he's gone and how she was like Nonsense only for it to come true#so yeah there's definitely a bit of the foreshadowy reference to Sev's death#because i like to be angsty#also to be clear severus is in his twenties here#he's been at hogwarts as a teacher long enough now to be more playful and silly and a general nuisance#but also a little affectionate too in his own way#(and definitely seeking a lil reassurance)#and he's definitely been here long enough for minerva to have 1) adopted him 2) realise how she's responsible for his trauma here#and 3) have way too many what ifs and regrets#anyway sev being a playful lil shit gives me life what can I say he enjoys being dramatic#especially if it annoys minerva
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SAW 0.5 (2003) // SAW (2004) dir. James Wan
#i didn't realise that saw was much darker than saw 0.5. the colours look so off sorry:/#saw 0.5#saw 0.5 david#leigh whannell#saw#saw 2004#amanda young#shawnee smith#james wan#cinemagifs#horror#moviegifs#sawedit#useranna3#🫀#tw blood
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ppl who are like "have you ever experienced a close female friendship" to try deny rhaenicent like.. yes bitch i have!!! and thats *exactly* why i can tell theres MORE than just "close friendship" between these two gay bitches!!
#rhaenicent#hotd#house of the dragon#alicent hightower#alicent x rhaenyra#rhaenyra targeryan#hotd s2#young alicent#young rhaneyra#like so many people think my best friend and I are romantically involved because we're that close#i love her to death and she loves me and we're very comfortable in ourselves and our friendship#which is why i know for a fact rhaenicent is more than just close friendship between two people#im non-binary btw !! not a woman at ALL but i am afab and my friendship w my bsf began before I realised I was trans#so we were for a period fitting under the label of close girl friends or “close female friendship”#now we're not cuz yea im not a girl got hit with the trans beam<3#but back to the point like YES i have experienced close close “female friendship” and rhaenicent is not just friendship#alicent hightower x rhaenyra targaryen
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every time i read a fic where lily evans is upheld as a paragon of justice and the underdogs and the vulnerable, i die a little inside
bc,,,,are we talking ab the same gal who kept defending snape for atleast five years of hogwarts and however many before that? who overlooked his bigoted actions, even when others called it/her out on it?
ugh
(now james, on the other hand? we have such clear evidence that he fits this archetype but ofc that’s overlooked isn’t it. gonna shut up here but will take the rant into the tags)
#james potter#reading another fic#where it goes#‘ur sense of justice is all lily harry she cared so much’#uhhhhh no?#she only cared about snape?#her entire problem w the marauders was that they picked on *snape*#one throwaway comment sn j hexing people does not a champion make#in fact my reading of lily actually puts her as extremely not empathetic actually#the way she behaved towards young petunia was also. hm.#she always seemed stuck up and righteous#idk where we got this impression of her from#but!!!!!! u know what we do have!!!!!#JAMES as the paragon of VIRTUE and JUSTICE#it is so obvious it’s almost too much#this dude was friends w a werewolf and a disgraced pureblood scion and a loser#he was so against blood purity politics he couldn’t even repeat the word mudblood#he joined a war bc it was the right thing to do n not bc he’s personally affected#his spirit animal is a STAG#a noble honourable protector like cmon how much more obvious can it get???#but ofc we have to Gender our headcanons in all instances w/o even realising it#so we end up w this clusterfuck of a characterisation#ugh#can u tell it annoys me a lot lmaoo#pen’s yapping#oh also i found my previous tag lol#pen’s whining#what do i do now
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i'm gonna say it i genuinely believe that harry potter taught way more harmful messages to girls and young people than twilight ever did, and i'm being 100% serious like this is something i've thought about at length and have also experienced firsthand
#rain posts#like yeah jkr sucks but her books suck too. hp is not good in terms of its themes and messages#like at all#there's so much wrong with it#and it's so insidious that you don't realise it as a young person or even as an adult without really thinking about it#like with twilight you're like yeah ok stalking bad. gaslighting and controlling behaviour bad. racism bad. imprinting on babies bad.#but with hp it's so much more complex and i do believe that it makes it more dangerous
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thinking abt maya seeing through trucy's facade because she's ALSO been a young traumatised child who grew up wanting to please the adults around her and having to be grateful to be taken in. about her accepting that this is something trucy will continue to do because as a child with no real agency it is the one thing she has to protect herself. and she doesnt try to fix it but instead reassures her as often as she can that love can be unconditional
#thinking about Them hours....#phoenix realises it sooner i think i mean hes her DAD. i think thats why they become so close bc he also Gets it that#shes young and traumatized and he can't expect her to be like others her age after all she's been through and so he can't treat her liketha#and also realizes that he can only do his best to be a good parent without ever expecting her to reciprocate his love#(i think she does reciprocate it but itll take a longg while)#thinking abt both maya and trucy thinking they're only good for their powers but while they had both thought it was unavoidable to be used#they have such different outlooks on it. anyway i want to squish both of them and go 'YOU ARE LOVED!!!!!!! DO YOU SEE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'#ace attorney#maya fey#trucy wright
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Today in spinjitsu brothers; Garm witnesses his future and becomes traumatized and anxious about the thought of becoming a lonely monster :(
#in the end.. Garms coping mechanism from feeling lonely is a GREEN PLANT#he says “its the only green in my life. i hoped it would one day grow and thrive. and one day forgive me.. but now its gone. and i am alone”#and the fact lloyd tried so much to help his resurrected father.. and in the garmadon comic he realises that his son never gave up on him..#Lloyd HEALS Garmadon and no one can take that away from me#ninjago#ninjago fandom#lord garmadon#ninjago garmadon#garmadon ninjago#ninjago lord garmadon#lord garmadon ninjago#ninjago spinjitzu brothers#spinjitsu brothers#young garmadon
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So I was going through your blog (again) and found some of your stuff mentions fsau Raz having ADHD, as somebody with adhd I’m intrigued, may I have some of those headcanons (canons??) related to that? Also, I would give “a penny for your thoughts” but I’m out of pennies, so here’s various images of a drawing of ur blorbo I put next to my animals, note that a rock had to be added in one picture to keep him from flying away (BONUS: his now permanent place with the wifi guardian frog)
NOTHING brings me more joy than seeing physical drawings of these guys, like, out and about. in situations. thank you for this gift, and ALSO for the great ask because it's a perfect chance to ramble
so first of all, canon Raz having ADHD is very real to me. he's constantly fidgeting and moving around, getting distracted by sidequests and scavenger hunt objectives, always talking to himself out loud, gotta write everything down so he remembers it because there's so much to DO!, running away from home because his dad yelled at him one time and now Raz assumes he must hate him forever... i could go on, but i think there's a lot of room for interpretation there!
in my headcanon, he never got diagnosed as a kid. maybe there were some notes about it in his reports each year, sure - but a little hyperactivity and distractability never seemed to slow him down. he excelled in lessons and on missions, and when he was with his family their performances gave him something to focus that energy into. it was only really when he turned 18 and graduated to a full agent that the cracks started to show.
because there's a big difference between the responsibilities you have as a minor, and the responsibilities you have as an 18-year-old living away from home! one who's expected to cook and clean for themselves, and take care of adult life stuff, and also work the 9-to-5 office job he's just graduated into that involves sitting in front of a computer and write reports all day.
short-term, he found he could get himself to power through a deadline with energy drinks and psi-pops (a lot of psi-pops...)
long-term, something had to give. he was working himself to exhaustion, constantly stressed, swinging between days spent staring at his computer screen doing nothing and all-nighters desperately trying to finish his paperwork before the deadline. it just didn't make any sense to him. he'd finally started his job as a Psychonaut, he was living independently like he'd always dreamed, he'd gotten top surgery after planning it for so long. he should have everything he ever wanted. why wasn't he happy?
following a deep post-surgical depression, about a month before his 19th birthday Raz was living out of his car, couch-surfing or sleeping in his office. he got kicked out of his apartment after falling behind on bills and rent. it wasn't that he didn't have the money, it was all just too much for him to stay on top of.
he'd probably have stayed in that misery hole for a lot longer if Frazie hadn't marched into his life and demanded he let her help him move into a new place, or she was telling mom that he was homeless. together, they sorted through all of his possessions from the last place - everything that had been hastily shoved in his car, or tossed in a box in his office, piled in a heap that was giving him anxiety even looking at it.
things do get better for him from there.
when he eventually explains things to Hollis, she gently suggests that he should get a roommate. he ends up moving in with Phoebe, and they become pretty good friends after a couple months! something about having another person around to help do the chores and wash the dishes and share the space helps, even if it takes him a while to admit it.
he gets his ADHD diagnosis, and finding the exact right medication and dose is a journey he's still on years later - but they're a huge help in getting him to actually knuckle down and finish his work on time. and the whole thing ends up being a chance for him to take a step back and really think about what he wants to do with his life. he'd always assumed that being a Psychonaut was his dream, but he'd never really reckoned with what that dream would look like before.
in the end, he sticks with it, but also decides to follow Lili's example in branching out. he applies to study a part-time Bachelor's in Psychology on a remote course, and gets accepted. juggling missions and paperwork and study and relationships (because the whole thing made him realise he also wasn't setting aside any time for himself, and wow, dating is a thing) is a lot - but he manages to figure it out, day by day.
(Lili comes back to the Psychonauts after graduating. she and Raz have both changed a lot over those four years, but on their first mission together they hit it off like a house on fire - and the rest is history!)
#psychonauts#future superstar agents au#i really want to go more into this period of their lives for all three of them honestly#Raz and Phoebe's friendship is really sweet to me and i'd like to explore it more#and Lili's adventures at college! finding herself in an environment where for the first time in her life people /don't/ know her family nam#and Dogen finally realising he /has/ a life to live ahead of him. that it's not just isolation and tests and pills that don't work#young adulthood is a weird time! lots of ups and downs#but they all make it through okay#fsau raz#fsau frazie#babyfaced 18-yo raz is so funny to me. why are you making him experience the horrors he's literally just a little guy#ask#ALSO your pets are all wonderful. please give them kisses from me
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uhh another modern au agott follow-up. They've gotten progressively sillier
#witch hat tag#orufrey#hopefully you remember where she's at. the original one about her turmoils with art was so sincere....#but this is sincere too. being a 12 year old autistic lesbian is one of the most stupid things to experience. Like what is happening.#Yeah OK maybe i'm a wee lesbo. but i'm focusing on my CAREER rn so idc about that. SO i'm very upset that other ppl are not FOCUSING!!!!#A-AND FYI MY TEACHER HE CARRIES AROUND A GIRLY LIL PURSE!!! SO THERE!!!! Why are they walking away#agott helps me have to decide how to draw expressions i have never drawn before.#i actually realised looking at the concept art book stuff more carefully that coco is canonically 14? Ok....#it's a little too cruel if theyre dealing with periods on top of saving witch society from its foibles..but ok.. i do feel that riche is 12#also coco's hair is going to turn dark green when she's an adult or something. it's 'blonder' now due to being a kid🤔#abba is bc after a big long modern au orufrey comic where they got together i just strongly felt that they slowdanced to abba that day#feeling the mirth and hope of life and 'young and sweet only 17' why didnt we get together sooner but its ok like this & i love you dearly.#teen qif secretly listening to abba heartache songs after olly's caretaker drives him away..in that faded neopets hoodie.#it became 'their music' their silly little music.. right up there with the faerie bubbles theme.. (<- frustrating neopets minigame.)
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#I was drawing Scout and I realised I never posted a drawing of him so here it is#I love yall#artists on tumblr#artwork#tf2#digital art#young artist#ibis paint#team fortress 2#tf2 art#tf2 fanart#made in ibis paint#tf2 scout#scout tf2#scout#team fortress scout#tf2 fandom#team fortress 2 fanart#team fortress#team fortress fanart#team fortress two#red scout
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