#these aren’t the characters I grew up with or loved
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gabrielleyueerrrrr · 15 hours ago
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Rain Lilies - AVA/M
Word count: 2,165
CW/TW: - Canonical character death, if you survived AVA 11, you can survive this :)
Characters: Victim, Mitsi, Agent
Relationships: VictimxMitsi, Victim&Mitsi, Victim&Agent
Addtional tags: It gets better before it gets worse, Victim has speech impediment, Mitsi my beloved is trying her best
Summary: Mitsi and Victim grow some flowers.
»»———— ❋ ————-««
A brown paper bag rested on the table, slumped slightly under the weight of its contents. Inside it were small, teardrop-shaped bulbs, their surfaces covered in delicate, dry papery layers.
Victim frowned at it. “M-Mitsi... d-did you double-check our g-grocery list? We d-don’t need this m-many... sh-shallots, do we?”
The familiar stammer clawed its way out of him, and frustration curled tight in his chest. He should have learnt to speak properly by now-
“Hmm?” Mitsi’s head appeared from the kitchen, her ponytail swaying as she turned toward him. She followed his gaze to the bag, then broke into a delighted giggle. “Oh, Vicky, no! These aren’t shallots—they’re flower bulbs!”
Victim blinked. “Fl-flower bulbs?”
“Yep! The auntie at the flower shop gave them to me for free, as a thank-you gift for fixing her radio.” Mitsi hopped over and reached for Victim’s hands, her slender fingers wrapping warmly around his. Victim stiffened, but she didn’t seem to notice—or maybe she didn’t care. “I thought we could plant them in the front yard! Imagine—a little garden of our own. Doesn’t that sound wonderful?” Her eyes sparkled, bright with excitement. 
How she can find joy in every little thing around them, Victim could never understand.
Victim tilted his head, his brow furrowing. “W-why would you want to do th-that?” he asked, his voice slow, hesitant. “It’s not like they c-can b-be eaten... or, or turned into s-something useful.” He flicked his gaze to Mitsi’s face, bracing for the impatience or annoyance he’d come to expect from others. But all he found was her usual gentle smile, as if he hadn’t stumbled over every word.
"B-but if you like, like flowers, we c-can always buy some..." His voice grew smaller and smaller.
“Well, sure,” Mitsi said breezily, giving his hands a small squeeze. “But what’s the fun in that?”
“I d-don’t see the ap-appeal in handling dirt all, all day.” Victim muttered.
Her smile widened, and she leaned closer, a playful glint in her eyes. “But have you ever tried gardening before?”
“…N-no?”
“Then how do you know it’s not fun?”
“I…” Victim opened his mouth to argue, but no words came. With a reluctant sigh, he nodded, defeated.
Mitsi laughed, the sound light and clear, like the tinkling of silver bells. “Come on, Vicky! I know you’ll love it.”
»»———— ❋ ————-««
“Y-you know I can just…use my tools to make a h-hedge, right? Much q-quicker and sturdier.” Victim crossed his arms, glancing down at his partner, tone unimpressed. Mitsi sat cross-legged on the ground, humming a cheerful tune as she stitched together pieces of branches with straws.
“Yes, but I want to do it this way,” she replied, testing the durability of her handiwork before driving it firmly into the dirt.
Victim sighed and leaned his full weight against the makeshift hedge, pressing it deeper into the soil. “I d-don't know why you insist on doing e-everything by h-hand,” he said, his voice breathless from the effort.
“Well…” Mitsi paused to wipe the sweat beading on her forehead. “It feels like cheating to use quick and easy solutions for something like building a garden. Kind of takes away the magic, don’t you think?”
Victim shook his head, watching as she moved on to another piece. “I d-don’t think I get it, but…” He crouched beside her, meeting her expectant gaze. “Show me how you w-want it d-done.”
Remove all the grass and weeds.
Loosen the soil to a depth of 2-3 inches.
Plant the bulbs 2-3 inches deep, with the pointed end facing up.
Water the bulbs thoroughly.
Finally, add a layer of mulch on top of the soil.
By the time they finished, the sun was setting, casting their small garden in a honey-colored glow.
The two of them collapsed onto the ground, shoulder to shoulder, panting as they admired their work in silence. The soft chirping of crickets filled the air, and the tiny patch of earth in front of them looks tidy and full of promise.
"Oh, Vicky, hold still-" 
“Hm?” Victim turned, only to feel Mitsi’s fingers brush against his cheek, wiping away a smudge of dirt.
“There.” She smiled, her eyes reflecting the warm hues of the alpenglow. For a moment, she looked at him like she’d uncovered some hidden treasure.
And although every muscle in his body ached with exhaustion, and his back was sticky with sweat, Victim thought that maybe, gardening wasn’t so bad after all.
»»———— ❋ ————-««
For the next few weeks, their garden thrived. Baby-green shoots emerged first, sharp as needles yet tender as silk. The shoots grew, unfurling slender, elegant leaves that swayed gently in the breeze. Two months after planting, small, tightly bundled buds began to form at the tips of the stems. Despite himself, Victim often found his gaze drawn to the window, secretly hoping to catch their first bloom unfurling under the sunlight.
Spring faded, its warm, floral breezes giving way to the heavy stillness of summer. The days grew hotter, quieter, as though the world itself were holding its breath.
Then, without warning, the storm struck.
The sky turned a bruised gray, and rain fell in relentless, bullet-like drops that battered the earth. Their little house shuddered under the force of the wind and rain, its wooden walls groaning like an old ship at sea.
Victim paced fretfully back and forth in front of the window, his gaze fixed on the blurred outlines of the garden. The rain fell too hard, too fast, obscuring everything. The thought of their flowers—exposed, their delicate leaves tearing and stems snapping under the storm—made his chest tighten.
“Vicky, what’s wrong?” Mitsi’s hand rested lightly on his shoulder, but this time, her touch didn’t calm him. He shrugged her hand off, his stammer spilling out faster than usual.
“I-it’s all my f-fault,” he cradled his head, shaking it in frustration. “T-the flowers… I-I should’ve… s-set up a canopy, or… or s-something. I-I should’ve kn-known this w-would happen.”
“Oh, Vicky…” Mitsi cupped his face, her hands firm yet gentle as she lifted his head to meet her steady gaze. “It’s not your fault. No one could’ve seen this storm coming.”
“T-the flowers, they’re p-probably all r-ruined…”
“They’re not,” Mitsi said softly, her tone sure and unwavering. “Storms happen all the time in the wild. If wildflowers can survive, ours can too.”
“H-how can you…be so sure?” he asked, his gaze flickering between her eyes and the rain outside.
“I'm not,” she admitted with a small smile. “But I choose to believe.” 
Victim’s eyes widened. Mitsi wrapped her arms around him, she smelled of sunlight, dried wool, and machine oil. “Our flowers are strong, Vicky. Stronger than you think.”
He stayed still for a moment, then nodded slowly, leaning into the embrace. “…W-what should we do now?” he asked. 
“We eat lunch,” Mitsi said, her voice steady and comforting like a weighted blanket, “And we wait for the storm to pass.”
»»———— ❋ ————-««
The rain ended as abruptly as it had begun. The sky slowly lifted, a thin ray of sunlight pierced through the clouds to bathe the ground. Everything felt freshly washed, the world damp and drowsy. A great silence settled in, broken only by the soft drip of water falling from the roof tiles.
The front door swung open with a gust of wind, and Mitsi darted outside toward the garden, Victim following closely behind, clutching the back of her jacket. Their footsteps splashed through puddles, sending droplets scattering. A frog, startled by the sudden movement, leaped from the middle of the road and vanished into the tall grass.
But then Mitsi stopped, making Victim nearly bumping into her. Wordlessly, he slipped her jacket over her shoulders, but she didn’t seem to notice. Her eyes, wide and bright, was fixed to the garden in front of her.
“Look!” She said in a hushed voice.
Victim took a small step to the side, his breath catching as he mentally braced himself for the worst.
“Ah…” was all he could manage.
Countless newly bloomed flowers peeked out from a sea of green leaves. Dew drops rested lazily on their delicate petals, reflecting the sunlight with a mischievous glint. When the wind passed through, they twinkled like stars—white, pink, and yellow. “Hello, hello!” they seemed to sing, "Hello, hello!"
“Rain lilies,” Mitsi whispered softly beside him, “They bloom after a storm.”
Victim’s hand found hers, his grip tight, “T-They made it,” he said, his voice trembling, a shaky laugh escaping him. “I can’t believe they made it.”
“No, Vicky!” Mitsi turned to hold both of Victim’s hands, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. She looked at him then—more beautiful than he’d ever seen her—her face radiant with untamed joy. “We made it!”
With that, they spun in circles together, the cool, muddy earth squelching beneath their feet. Mitsi laughed a pure, contagious laugh, one that Victim would try to remember all his life. Their shoes were soaked, their trousers splattered with mud, but they couldn’t care any less.
And if a rainbow appeared above them, arching over their garden as though the heavens themselves were smiling down on them, well… that was just a bonus.
»»———— ❋ ————-««
“Sir, you need to rest.”
Victim didn’t respond. His fingers, stiff and numb, pressed the replay button again. The screen flickered to life, Agent’s memory recording lit up the dark room.
Fire, debris, the deafening screams. Mitsi running toward a citizen trapped under a collapsed wall. Mitsi struggling beneath the rubble while bombs of fire rain down upon her. Mitsi, swallowed by the explosion.
Three days after the destruction of Newgrounds, Victim sequestered himself in the memory machine room. He replayed the scene over and over, watching it until his eyes burned like acid, until his head felt ready to explode, until the diabolic face of the black hollowhead, Mitsi’s killer, was seared into his mind, his nightmares, his soul.
Agent crouched in front of him. Behind his sunglasses, his best friend’s eyes were bloodshot, full of pleading.
“Vic, please.” Agent’s voice shook, and Victim had a sudden image of him teetering on the edge of an abyss.
Slowly, Victim stood, his joints stiff and protesting. He trudged toward the office he and Mitsi had shared, feeling the weight of Agent’s gaze on his back, a ghost haunting his every step.
Inside, the office felt strangely large and hollow. Mitsi’s big armchair faced away from him, as though it would turn at any moment to reveal her—smiling, teasing him across the desk. “And where have you been, my second-in-command?”
A horrible, broken sound tore from his throat, he swallowed it, covering his face as he walked quickly to his own desk.
But it wasn’t empty like he expected.
A gift box, wrapped meticulously in grey ribbon, sat in the middle of the desk. His heart skipped a beat. He recognized the handwriting on the tag.
For Vicky.
His hand shook as he opened the gift box, careful not to damage it in the slightest. Inside lay a flower crown, its glossy green leaves shimmering faintly. Inlaid among them, were—
When the wind passed through, they twinkled like stars — white, pink, and yellow.
—rain lilies.
Tears blurred his vision as he held the crown against his chest, cradling it as if it were the last piece of his girl left behind. 
Beneath it, he found one last thing: a folded card. 
He opened it slowly, reverently, like it was made of butterfly wings.
To my dearest Vicky,
Happy 4th anniversary of Rocket Inc.! I’ve always wanted to give you something special for this day, and I know you’d probably prefer something practical, but please don’t be mad at me for this flower crown instead! It took me forever to make—the flowers keep falling out—but I hope you’ll still like it. :)
Do you remember our garden? The rain lilies we planted? They’re my favorite flowers, you know. And I think they’re perfect for you, because they always bloom after a storm. I’ve always thought of them as a symbol of new beginnings. No matter how wild the storm, the rain lilies still bloom—stronger, more beautiful than before.
When we first met, you were hurting, Vicky. You were lost in your own storms, troubled by things I couldn’t even begin to understand. But I saw you change, little by little, bit by bit, you grew stronger. More confident. Happier. It’s hard for you to see, but I saw it. Every day.
You’re like our rain lilies, Vicky. You’ve faced your storms, even when you thought you wouldn’t survive them. But here you are, blooming. And I’m so proud of you. So, so proud.
I hope this flower crown helps remind you of that strength, of everything you’ve already overcome. And whenever you feel like the storm is too much, just look at the rain lilies. They’ll be here, just like me.
I’ll always be with you.
Yours, M ♡
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whatohitsonfirewelp · 2 years ago
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Guys I’m going into antman having watched NONE of the Disney plus shows. I have no idea if there’s characters I should already know and I don’t really care
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milolunde · 3 months ago
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We all know Timmy is Wanda’s mama’s boy but we need to keep in mind he’s still Cosmo’s kid too and that Cosmo would love him just as vehemently as Wanda
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#fairly oddparents#not that anyone has portrayed him different#certainly not distance he loves Timmy he probably says it the most in the show and in fanon#but still- watching New Wish there felt like there was a disconnect with Cosmos character-like he wasn’t as well defined as he was in OG#that’s in part due to them toning him down from being an idiot plain and simple but I feel like it wasn’t fitted with something else it was#simply taken away#just to say he didn’t have as much of a presence to me in New Wish as Wanda did and I crave spinning Cosmo around in my brain#I want to see Poof being his Dad’s Boy yknow and I want to see cosmo doting and I want to see when he gets like. parental rage for the sake#of his kids#yknow? Yknow? part of him feeling detached in a new wish has translated into him not wanting to get as close to Hazel as he did Timmy-#to try and play it more like godparents are supposed to- just a presence for a couple months#but also because like. he got SO attached to Timmy and he’ll never regret it and he’d never do anything different#but idk. if it were me I wouldn’t have the capacity to go through losing my godkid again after becoming that attached#that’s not even mentioning that they don’t HAVE to be in hazel’s life the same way they were in Timmy’s because Timmy was going through#neglect and Hazel has loving family and friends all around her at all times- her blocks are mental#in that way cosmo and Wanda just have to do the Typical Godparent Job of aiding her- not becoming people she desperately needs in life#which also bleeds into why I think Peri was having such a. difficult time#godparents aren’t supposed to be attached the way his family was to Timmy and that how he learned it#but his first godkid is Not Easy and lends immediately to the issues Timmy was having where he HAS parents he HAS things (though . Timmy#was not rich and would sometimes not be fed… dev’s dad also forgets to feed him but dev is still able to eat you know)#and how he grew up with his parents as godparents and how he’s been taught are conflicting and it’s nature vs doing a good job quoteunquote#I didn’t mean to ramble so damn much in the tags I’m really sorry#told myself if I had more to say I’d write it down and post it later but I must be heard.
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quillkiller · 4 months ago
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Petunia literally abused Harry bro 💀 and pointing that out doesn’t mean we’re downplaying her grief or bc she’s a woman
yall are gonna freak out when you realise that abusers are also human
#’she literally ABUSED—’ yes ? and i still find her captivating and interesting#abusers are almost never just evil monsters#they’re human beings who chose to do that to you#they actively chose to treat you that way Knowing Better#and just putting the label ’abuser’ on a fictional character is so boring omg what about character studies#some people can be unredeemable ! and i can still sympathize#ive said it before. im never going to forgive my abuser and would probably punch you if you asked me to#<- but some people love my abuser and my abuser have real and good relationships in her life#shes not Evil and Monstrous all the time#but she was that way with me#people aren’t one dimensional ! life isn’t that black and white !#and its frankly quite childish and downright strange if you dont have the capacity to understand that#i literally talked about how my narcissa had good intentions but unredeemable in an ask like. the other day#nuance is interesting i fear :/#some people dont break the cycle of abuse and some people dont grow up to be good people#doesnt mean thats all there is to them i fear#anyway!#asks#also who said anything about her being a woman. that was all you king#also. sy’s post had nothing to do with petunias relationship with harry ? yall are just pointing that out because you hate women#<- now i said it!#like sy was making an interesting point about petunias grief about losing a sister she barely knew anymore but grew up with#and yall have to come in and be like WAAAAHHH SHES AN ABUSER THO DID U KNOW DID YOUUUUU#grow up
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youbutstupid · 5 months ago
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What I love about Criminal Minds is that the female characters aren’t tough simply because they ‘grew up with brothers’ or because their dads ‘made them brave’.
JJ and Kate grew up with sisters. Emily, Elle, Seaver and Todd were all only children and Emily’s past was shaped by her mother’s actions. Tara, Penelope and Alex all had brothers but those brothers weren’t credited with their success and bravery.
Women don’t need to be around masculine energy to be tough, they don’t need to be influenced by men to be brave. The fact tv shows need to justify their female characters being strong by saying they were around men is just insulting.
Stop treating women like they are weak unless there is a man there to teach them not to be.
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dovedrangeas · 2 years ago
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thinking about snow au technoblade. no one talk to me
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grandline-fics · 6 months ago
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Nightmare Wedding
DESCRIPTION: They have a nightmare that you marry someone else
WARNINGS: slight angst and some insecurities but with comfort and happy endings in all
CHARACTERS: Ace, Shanks, Mihawk, Kid, Katakuri | Law, Zoro
WORDS: 3,014
A/N: I loved this idea and couldn't help but do another. Of course as soon as I posted the last one an idea for Ace finally came to me. Added Ace and Kid for @breadlover6969 and Mihawk, Shanks, and Katakuri (who also won the poll) for @kabloswrld
Hope you all enjoy!
*REQUESTS ARE OPEN*
MASTERLIST | PROMPT LIST
———————
ACE
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Ever since you and Ace became a couple, Ace noticed that he slept amazing when you were beside him. The nights you had to sleep apart however, brought restlessness, sometimes strange dreams that left him feeling as though he hadn’t slept at all, but it was worse when he had to suffer through nightmares. Tonight, he reluctantly went to bed while you had to stay in the infirmary while you recovered from a sickness. It was just a precaution to avoid you infecting the others but Ace needed more convincing than the others. He didn’t care if he got sick and would have risked it but you managed to talk him around, promising it would be just one night and it would make you feel better to know he was safe and healthy. Reluctantly he climbed into the bed and pouted at your empty side until his eyes grew heavy and sleep claimed him. 
“Ace how do I look?” You asked him in his dream and he broke out into an overwhelmed smile, taking in your breathtaking appearance. You were all but glowing, dressed for a wedding; your wedding. Slowly he reached out to cup your face before taking your hand to playfully twirl you and take in your outfit with growing appreciation. Unable to hold back, he pulled you into a tight hug. “You look amazing, you always do.” He whispered, pulling back to see your eyes light with joy as you you looked down at your outfit, smoothing the fabric into place. 
“I’m glad. I hope Marco thinks so too.” You beamed up at him, unaware of Ace’s expression dropping into one of confused dread. Marco? What did Marco have to do with it all? He quickly snapped out of his thoughts when you quickly took his hands into yours and leaned in with an excited smile. “Ace, will you walk me down the aisle? It’d mean so much to me!”
“B-but…aren’t you going to marry me?” Ace asked with a frown, his heart sinking when you tilted your head in confusion before laughing. 
“Ace, don’t be silly!” You grinned, giving him a playful shove. “You know I’m marrying Marco, come on I can’t be late!” Before he could react, you grabbed his wrist and hurried down a corridor that seemed unending. Finally the corridor shifted to reveal a filled room, your hand was no longer in his and you stood with Marco at the altar. 
His stomach lurched and Ace let out a yelp as he landed on the floor of his room, tangled in the bedsheet and head swimming as he tried to let his brain catch up with the fact he was awake and what he’d just witnessed was a horrible dream. Scrambling to his feet, Ace bolted out of the room and hurried to the infirmary, hearing the sound of you coughing when he neared the door. Quietly he entered and walked quietly to your bedside. “Ace? You should be in bed.” You told him weakly. 
“No, I should never have let you talk me into leaving you.” Ace said as he climbed into the bed with you, pulling you close to let you rest against him. His fingers lightly moved over your back, soothing your aching body while also finding your presence soothing him from the nightmare he’d had. “We’re a team right? Through thick and thin…sickness and in health.”
“Aren’t those wedding vows?”
“Are they?” Ace asked innocently but you could hear his heart pick up speed slightly. “Must have been a coincidence…”
SHANKS
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Before meeting you, Shanks never saw himself as the settling down type. He was more than content to live his days exploring and enjoying himself with a lover in every island should the mood take him. Then you came along and changed his life in every wonderful way imaginable. You were the adventure he’d been missing and hadn’t even known he was searching for. He couldn’t imagine ever being apart from you. You might have fallen for his charm and flirtatious smile first but he fell for your warmth and beautiful soul so much harder. 
So when he dreamt of himself standing at the front of an altar, he knew you would be the only other possible person his subconscious would conjure to join him. Shanks felt excitement gather in his chest and then in a blink he saw Beckman appear beside him. “This is a big thing, Captain. You sure you can go through with this?” His right-hand man asked with a grin before continuing. “I mean you’ve never preformed a wedding ceremony before, will you be able to handle it?”
Shanks felt his excitement fizzle out and it was quickly replaced with confusion and apprehension. Yes, as Captain he would be the one to marry members of his crew but he couldn’t possibly be the one to get married and preform the ceremony at the same time. It didn’t make sense and as much as he wanted to know, he dreaded what the explanation would be because he already knew it wasn’t going to be something he’d like. “Benn! Shanks!” 
Both heads turned and Shanks’ chest felt like it was going to explode with adoration and pride as he saw you hurry to them. He waited for your hands to reach for him but instead you merely smiled at him and hurried to Beckman’s side, eagerly letting his arms wrap around you and hold you close. “Sorry I’m late but we can start now.” You beamed, your gaze settling on Shanks’ face expectantly. “Whenever you’re ready Captain, I can’t wait to marry this man!”
With a jolt and gasp, Shanks woke to the calm, dark silence using the sound of the gentle waves hitting the side of the Red Force to help calm his breathing. He glanced to down to see you curled up on your side, your back against him and your arms loosely but just as possessively wrapped around his arm. Shanks let out a small huff as he silently laughed at his stupid mind for conjuring such a ridiculous scenario. Rolling onto his side, Shanks pressed a kiss against your temple, stilling when you began to shift. You turned as you began to wake, curling into his chest and let out a sleepy smile when his now freed arm tightened around you, keeping you close. “Everything okay?” You mumbled. 
“Never better.” Shanks affirmed with a smile, pressing another kiss against your cheek. As much as he knew it was a ridiculous dream and that things between you both were beyond amazing, Shanks considered that maybe he was worried in some part that someone may take you from him someday. “Promise me you won’t marry Beck, okay?”
“Why, you wanna marry him?” Even half-asleep you were still able to make a joke and help your lover relax. 
“The only one I want to be committed to is you.”
“Good, because I’m not going anywhere.” 
“Promise?”
“I do.”
MIHAWK
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“Clown, what is the meaning for all of this…fanfare?” Mihawk asked, looking around the extensibly decorated circus tent. Brightly coloured ribbons adorned the ceiling, flowers were displayed in grand, flashy, and quite simply ostentatious arrangements that just screamed ‘Buggy the Clown.’ None of it was to Mihawk’s taste but it was clear the clown was up to something. The figurehead of Cross Guild spun around, dressing in a bright suit and his painted smile, spread wide in triumph. 
“Mihawk! So glad you’ve arrived. We were worried you were going to miss the festivities. They’ll be writing about this in the papers for weeks.” Buggy declared with a laugh, allowing his hands to detach from his arms to gesture widely as confetti seemed to rain down from nowhere. Mihawk’s eye twitched at the useless theatrics, he’d asked a question and wanted an actual answer. Thankfully he didn’t need to repeat himself because Buggy cleared his throat and stepped to the side to show the altar Mihawk could have sworn wasn’t there before. “It’s my wedding obviously.”
A wedding? This was the first Mihawk heard about it. As far as he knew, Buggy hadn’t had a serious relationship in a long time, certainly not serious enough to warrant a wedding. So who was the clown’s secret betrothed? The answer came instantly when he heard footsteps behind him. Mihawk turned and did a double take when he saw it was you. The look in your eyes was filled with so much excitement and joy they practically sparkled. He began to reach out for you but you slipped past him and continued with conviction until you were proudly beside Buggy. Disbelief gripped Mihawk at the scene in front of him. No, this was impossible. Letting his instincts take hold, he reached for Yoru and charged for Buggy. 
“Mihawk, no!” You pleaded, stepping in front and stopping his attack mid-swing with just your voice. “Please it’s my wedding day. Promise there’ll be no fighting. For me okay?” Mihawk snapped awake immediately and let out a sigh of relief to see he was in his own quarters and not a garish decoration in sight. Despite having slept, the nightmare he was forced to endure had left him exhausted. Part of him was reluctant to try and fall back to sleep out of worry of what other hellish thoughts his mind would conjure for him. 
With a sigh he reached out your side of the bed and only now he noticed it was empty. Yet it was still warm, you’d only just risen but it was still late at night. Just as he was about to rise and search for you, the door opened and you silently crept in, pausing to see Mihawk was awake and watching you. Now seeing you had no need to be stealthy you smiled and walked back towards the bed. “I was getting a drink of water. Did I wake you?”
“No, love.” Mihawk answered, holding out his arms to pull you close against him, his eyes closing when your fingers slipped into his hair. “Had an awful dream you married the clown and wouldn’t let me cut him to pieces for it.” 
“How strange…” You mused with a yawn. “Although I’m not opposed to the idea, truth be told.”
“Marrying the clown?” Mihawk leaned back to look at you, unable to hide his disgust as the images from his dream came flooding back. 
“No!” You laughed pressing a kiss against his cheek. “Marrying you. Although people consider us married anyway.” Mihawk chuckled, it was true. Mihawk supposed now that it had been properly brought up, it was worth considering to finally propose. His golden eyes observed you carefully and saw your eyes were growing heavy. That was a conversation best saved for the morning. 
KID
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“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!” Kid shouted as he looked at you standing hand in hand with none other than Strawhat Luffy, both of you dressed very clearly for a wedding. At his outburst you both turned to look at him in shared confusion. “Him? You’re seriously going to marry him! He’s a moron!”
“Only sometimes.” You shrugged before smiling dreamily at the Strawhat pirate. “He’s also super strong, and funny, and he’s King of the Pirates now so-”
“What? No he’s not!” Kid argued angrily trying to charge forward but every step he took kept him firmly on the same spot. This wasn’t real, this couldn’t be happening. You were with him! You had no interest in the pipsqueak Captain of the Strawhats like that. You weren’t as shallow to only be with something because of their title, you weren’t like that. You saw the good in people, you’d seen the good in him and you loved him. Of that much Kid was certain of. This just had to be some awful dream. He just needed to wake up and everything would be okay. 
“Kid!” Kid jolted upright with a yell meeting your bewildered gaze. “What is it? You were calling my name over and over. Are you okay?” You hesitated from touching him as out of fear he was still clinging to the nightmare he was waking from, not wanting to overwhelm him but you had to speak to him, to reassure him your were here. You watched as Kid steadied his breathing and reached out towards you with his good arm. Quickly you took his hand into both of yours and guided his fingers to rest against your collarbone so he could feel your steady heartbeat under your skin and feel the rise and fall of your chest, hoping he would copy the steadied breaths and calm. “I’m here, we’re safe in our room. What do you need?”
“Kill Strawhat.” Kid ground out tightly as he calmed, his fingers flexing around yours just a little tighter to ground him in the reality. Finally he let out a long, heavy sigh and shook his head. “Nah, he’s not worth my time. Just need you babe.” You let out a sigh of your own, soft and relieved to hear him speak and inched closer, smiling when his hand moved up to curl behind your neck and thread into your hair, pulling you in for a soft and gentle kiss. Parting he lay his forehead against yours, finding his ability to be vulnerable around you to be proof of the love you both shared.
“Promise me, even if that little runt becomes King of the Pirates and asks you to marry him, you’ll say no.”
“Kid, you’re the only one I’ve ever wanted.” You reassured him softly. “Don’t care about titles or any of that stuff but if you want to give me a ring and let me call you husband if it makes you feel better we can do that?”
“Did you just half-ass a proposal to me?” Kid asked with a grin, all worries from his dream vanishing instantly. 
“Not at all, Captain. Was just letting you know you can half-ass propose to me if you want.” With a laugh and a playful shove, Kid considered taking you up on the offer but now he had to wait for a while so that when he did propose, it would seem like it was all his idea.
KATAKURI
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Another tea-party, another celebration filled with people and a feast of the finest food imaginable. Katakuri stood firmly in place, watching all of the guests and his family occupy the space, prepared for anything to happen. Like everything else, nothing would escape his sight and nothing would ruin his mother’s carefully planned party, he always made sure of that. Across the large garden he caught sight of the extravagant mountain-sized wedding cake and now he felt confused, he hadn’t known this was a wedding. Curiously he looked around, searching for his siblings to spot who would be the bride or groom. But then that thought went out of his head when he saw you of all people standing at the altar at the top of the cake. 
His heart all but skipped when he saw you but that led him to become even more confused. If you were up there and waiting to get married, why was he all the way down here and standing watch? He was madly in love with you and you loved him, so why were you both apart? Then you turned to face someone who was on top of the cake with you. Katakuri watched in dismay to see his brother Perospero take your hand in his and grin at you. Behind his thick layers of his scarf wound around the lower half of his face, Katakuri’s lips curled in a tight snarl and he gripped his arms tightly to control the mounting anger. Why was this happening?
From behind him he heard his mother’s loud laughter, delighted by the ceremony taking place on the cake she couldn’t wait to devour. Katakuri lowered his gaze and took a deep breath, of course. Big Mom did enjoy arranging marriages for her children and this was clearly one of her arrangements but he couldn’t help but feel the pain of how you’d been taken from him and he couldn’t do anything to intervene. Worse still, you didn’t even look like you wanted him to be in Prosperous place. 
Katakuri woke instantly, his eyes snapping open and his mind clearing just as fast. As though sensing the change in his body, you stirred from your comfortable place on his chest. As you rubbed the sleep from your eyes and yawned, Katakuri’s hand fell over your back, making sure to keep you comfortable knowing that your mind was still hazy and body was still heavy as it clung to the need for sleep. If he reassured you all was well quickly, you’d fall back into your own pleasant dreams in no time. “Kata…what’s the matter?” You mumbled, managing to crack your eyes open slightly to look at him. 
“Just a bad dream. I’m fine now.” Katakuri informed you simply, never needing to lie to you. 
“Hm, what kind of dream?” You asked, absently running your fingers over his chest as you listened to his steady heartbeat that always lulled you to sleep.
“Dreamt mother had arranged for you to marry Perospero.” He explained, rubbing your back in response to your soothing touches. “I could only stand by and watch.”
“Sorry you had to dream such a thing but don’t worry that won’t happen.”
“If mother demanded it, I couldn’t fight against her wishes.” Katakuri mumbled, feeling his own mind grow hazy once more as your radiating warmth was coaxing him to sleep. He blinked when you abruptly pushed yourself up to frown at him in the dark. “What?”
“Katakuri…we’re already married.” You reminded him, lifting your hand to show the band of metal on your finger glinting in the moonlight. With a tired, amused huff at your husbands momentary lapse in memory you flopped back down onto your husband’s chest. 
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sea-lanterns · 7 months ago
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BAD DOG!
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synopsis: you decide to muzzle your puppy girlfriend for the first time
featuring: jean, navia, beidou, miko
rating: 18+ smut (men and minors dni)
warnings: sub! afab fem reader, dog hybrid characters, muzzles, biting, possessive characters, feral women, transfem navia and transfem miko, cunni.lingus (jean), sixty nine position (jean), pet names, degradation, knotted strap ons (beidou), mating press (beidou), knots, bre.eding kink (miko), predator and prey kink (miko) do.ggy style (miko), may be ooc, not proofread.
art credits: unknown (found on pinterest)
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JEAN
“My darling please, please…I want to taste you so bad…please…” Jean whimpered and pawed at your fingers to unfasten the muzzle currently strapped to her jaw. She even growled a bit louder than usual as her floppy little tail wagged back and forth in anticipation of having your sweet pussy on her tongue. “I don’t even understand why I have to wear this…” Jean whines, her floppy ears lowering, “I don’t even have a biting problem. I’ve been more than gentle with you, my love…”
“It’s more so to satisfy a kink I have, rather than to actually punish you, Jean.” You chuckle quietly, gently stroking her sad puppy ears. “And you look so cute with the muzzle on!”
Jean whines and pushes her caged mouth closer to your face. “But I want to taste you…” she whispers into your ear, her lower body rubbing against your hips rather sensually. “I want to satisfy you. Shove my tongue inside that soft, velvety hole of yours and bury my face between your legs until— mmpf…” 
Her pupils blow back in lust when you gently rub against the crotch area of her pants, watching as a little wet spot begins to form the harder you continue to rub. “You will, but right now I want to see my puppy whine for me.”
And Jean did just that, her tail flopping submissively as she leans forward to press her muzzled face against your cheek. Her tongue pathetically darts out to try and kiss you through the metal bars of her caged head, whimpering as she could barely even reach you for a kiss. “My love…”
Oh this was torture for poor little Jean. She had spent the day working hard with only thoughts of her pretty girlfriend to keep her occupied. She was so eager to sink her thirsty little mouth into your dripping wet cunt, yet here you were, teasing her for no reason with this embarrassing toy of yours that restricted her access to tasting you! 
“At least let me kiss you…” Jean whispers softly, looking up at you with those big, pathetic puppy dog eyes that you grew oh so weak to. “I want to kiss my girlfriend, please…”
“Ohhh, Jean…” Fuck. You can’t help but instinctively reach over to unfasten the strap to her muzzle. “Fine. But only one ki— AH!” 
What a trickster! Jean has instantly torn off the muzzle and crawled down to face your clothed cunt, before tearing off your underwear with one eager claw. 
“Jean!”
“I’m sorry! I’ll buy you another pair!”
Yet she didn’t look too apologetic as she immediately drooled at the sight of your bare pussy before face planting right into your folds, moaning when she felt her tongue hit contact against your clit. Eager that she was, Jean lapped at your swollen slit like it was a treat that had been dangling above her for hours, the feeling of her drooling, messy tongue just sloppily pushing against your lips making you feel like you were in heaven.
“Ah…! Eager puppy, aren’t you?” You looked up to see her curly tail just wagging so much in excitement, the feast between your legs proving to be quite an amazing treat for your dearest puppy girl; Jean. 
“Heh, don’t worry, I’ll do the same to you. You deserve the same treatment, my love.”
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NAVIA
“Hey, why do I have to wear this?!”
Navia looked so annoyed. An angry pout on her usually friendly face, as it was rare for your girlfriend to ever get mad at you. “I just thought it’d look funny on you,” you giggled softly, covering your mouth to hide your grin. “Plus, sometimes you bite. Not very gently, either.”
“I do not!” Navia huffed and tried to get you to take it off, nuzzling her caged mouth against your cheek. “Take it off right now! I want to kiss you!” 
She growled softly and rutted her hips against your own, pinning you down with her body weight while making sure you could feel the small bulge growing underneath her skirt. She smirked when she saw you realize the stiffie, making sure to roll her hips a little more languidly in order for you to feel all of her arousal. “Come on baby…this isn’t fair to me…” Navia whispers, pouting down at you while her tail swishes rather intimidatingly. “Get the muzzle off…it’s too distracting as I can’t pleasure you properly. Please? Don’t you want me to fuck you full already…?” 
She smiled ever so innocently, never mind the fact that she had plans to completely wreck you in revenge for putting her in a muzzle in the first place! 
“Hmmmm…I don’t know if my puppy deserves to be off the muzzle tonight…” you teased, watching as your girlfriend’s face darkened and a small, irritated growl left her throat. “Perhaps she should prove to me she can control herself without restriction?” You playfully looped your finger through the loop of her collar, staring at the gold rose shaped emblem at the center and pulling her closer to face you. “My puppy has an uncontrollable biting problem after all. Bad girl.” 
Navia growled louder and her tail swished even faster, pushing your wrists above your head and lowering her caged mouth to your ears. 
“I’ll show you uncontrollable.” 
Your body involuntarily shivered at the hot breath let out from your girlfriend’s teeth. You knew Navia would never hurt you, she was always so sweet and gentle when it came to your sex life, yet it seems this time you pushed her buttons a little too far. “I’m going to take off your pants, okay? If I rip them, sorry in advance.”
Your cheeks burned red when she suddenly grabbed onto your bottoms and slid them off aggressively. It was clear that Navia was excited, the massive grin on her face proving so as she made quick work of discarding both of your undergarments. In an instant, you felt Navia’s hot, heavy cock land right on top of your aching clit. Her knot swelling at the base, ready to pump itself eagerly into you if you allowed her to. 
“Hah…muzzle or not, I think I’ve been too lenient on you. You think you can push me around, bratty girl? Hm?” Navia grinned and slowly grinded her member against your folds, chuckling at the way they seemed to glisten whenever she dragged herself a bit slower than usual. “Well, maybe it’s about time I stop pleasing my sweet owner…”
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BEIDOU
Beidou didn’t care if you muzzled her or not. She just wanted to fuck your brains out and have you a sobbing, moaning puddle under her while she railed you on her strap. Through heavy pants and labored grunts, your big, overgrown puppy woman held you down into a mating press and rammed the hefty strap on as far as she could go, growling whenever you whined and tugged on her leash, as she knew she was doing a great job.
“Like that huh? You like it when I stuff you full on this big, meaty dick?” Beidou laughed to herself at the vulgar language she just used, smothering her muzzled mouth against your neck and letting strings of saliva drip down from the caged bars. “You’re so hot…hah…so hot and tight.”
Her big, bushy tail swished from left to right as she buried her sheath deeper into your succulent, wet walls. She wanted so desperately to sink her awaiting canines into your throat and mark you jaw to collarbone in her marks, yet because of that stupid muzzle, she had to settle for drooling all over your neck through the bars of her cage. 
“I would’ve covered you in teeth marks by now…” Beidou growls, glaring down at you with wild, frenzied eyes, “But, maybe it’s for the best. Wouldn’t want to accidentally make you scream.” 
She thrusted her hips a bit sharper, eliciting a high-pitched yelp from your throat. 
“…Well, from pain.” 
Beidou chuckled and closed her eyes, lazily fucking you with greed as she wanted nothing more than to see the fake knot at the base of her strap, plug you all the way in when you eventually came. She shamelessly swiped her tongue across the metal bars of her muzzle, groaning at the metallic taste before nuzzling against your cheek. “So, princess, do you think you could take the muzzle off now?” She grinned, her tongue darting out to try and lick you through the gaps of her confines, “I’ve been such a good dog for you already…”
“You’ll…bite me all over…” you whispered breathlessly, whining when she gripped your hips tighter within her claws and thrusted her strap even rougher.
“I’d bite you eventually when this muzzle comes off…” Beidou groans, pushing the muzzle harder against your cheek as she rutted her strap at a much more feverish pace. “Though, the longer you keep this up, the more desperate I’ll be, baby…”
She gently pushed herself deeper into you, her tail beating faster against the bed when she saw the tiny tummy bulge pushing against your skin from how deep she was inside of you. “Archons, you’re so pretty…” she whispered out huskily, roaming her giant hands all around the skin of your stomach and pushing lightly on the bulge. “But, you’d definitely be even prettier once I get my canines all over you.”
It was there that Beidou finally used those giant claws of hers to disobey you, ripping the muzzle off with brute force and grinning down at you with wolfish features. The yelp you let out was adorable as Beidou suddenly pushed your legs up higher, pretty much folding you more in the mating press and moving her teeth dangerously close to your inner thighs. 
“It’s been looking a little too barren down here. Perhaps I should change that…”
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MIKO
Out of all the women to have been strapped with a muzzle, Miko was definitely the most furious. She had you bent over in front of her on the bed, doggy style as she pumped her angry red cock inside of you at a pace similar to that of when she was in a rut. The poor woman felt as if her ego had been shattered to pieces the moment you tricked her and got her to wear a muzzle. Now you are suffering the consequences of your actions, as Miko was not stopping her relentless pace and would growl in your ear whenever you tried to complain.
“M-Miko! Ah! S-Slow…down…” 
Your body moved pathetically with each harsh thrust, as Miko seemed to be trying to vent out her anger on you for making her wear such an embarrassing thing. “Cheeky brat…you really think this pathetic thing could stop me from biting you?” 
A low, husky growl emitted from her throat as she pushed her swollen member deeper into your cunt. “I could rip this muzzle off like paper. But…I’ll indulge in my little one’s silly little kinks for now.” She grinned maliciously and pushed you farther into the bed, rutting her hot and heavy cock deeper within you, as she was intent in possibly breeding you fully. 
“So tight…you like it when I go rough, hm? All muzzled and rabid like an animal?” She looked ticked off at her own words, her fox ears twitching in frenzy as she wanted to make you pay for teasing her. 
“N-No…that’s not what I meant— h-haah…” Miko grabbed your chin and forced you to look up at her, her sweet little pupils turning into slits as she took in how utterly delectable you looked underneath her. It was actually triggering her predator instincts to hold you down and claim you as her “prey.” 
“Liar. You’re such a cute little liar.” Miko grinned wolfishly through the bars of her muzzle and stuffed her knot deeper against your cunt. The base of it started to swell as she was getting ready to breed you full on her kitsune seed. “Look at you…barely able to talk even though I’m the one wearing this contraption,” she tsked and trailed one of her clawed fingers down your stomach, gently circling the growing bulge on your tummy that moved with each thrust of her dick. “Even when muzzled, you still act like a cute little bunny.” 
She licked her lips and felt the base of her knot begin to swell, her head throwing back in ecstasy as she prepared to fill you fully until her cum was leaking out of you. “Ah…you tightened a bit when I said that. You must really like being degraded, huh?” 
Miko growled and pushed her knot a bit deeper, forcing you to take a girthier bulb as she drooled a bit through the metal bars of her muzzle. 
“I can’t wait to devour this little bunny once I tear this muzzle off. Archons…that cute little pussy is mine.”
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darkmatilda · 12 days ago
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𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐟𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐟𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐬 | 𝐬.𝐫𝐞𝐢𝐝
𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: when you were accommodated in such a shabby hotel, the last thing you needed was a power outage. and upon learning about one of your colleagues' fear of the dark, you can't bring yourself to not help him
𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬/𝐩𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐰: spencer reid x newbaumember!femalereader, spencer is afraid of the dark and the reader comforts him, they comfort each other tbh, elle&morgan my fav duo, glasses reid obvi.
𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐬: 4.7k
𝐚/𝐧: these are my official apologies for all the recent stories 🫶🏼 i wanted it to be so much shorter but i just love writing conversations between characters so that's how it turned out. @mggslover i'm so sorry for not adding spencer falling off the bed but i didn't want to ruin that subtle ending :(( maybe next time
"Please, I’m begging you, I’m really begging you—begging in the name of a god I don’t even believe in. Tell me we’ve got the wrong address," Morgan said, squeezing his eyes shut the moment you all crossed the threshold of the motel where you'd been assigned to stay while working on the case in another state.
You noticed Elle’s expression falter as well. From the outside, the place hadn’t looked that bad. Well, perhaps it only seemed that way because the street it was on was so dark you couldn’t make out much of anything. Midnight must have been approaching; the first day of the investigation was officially over.
“We didn’t get it wrong,” Reid declared, stepping inside as the last of you, quickly scanning the interior. “I memorized it perfectly. Besides, there aren’t any other accommodations in the area, so this has to be it.”
“Do you remember that one case,” Elle started, “where the unsub killed women in hotel rooms and decorated the interiors with their intestines?”
You glanced at her, curious—or as curious as you could be under the circumstances. You’d only joined the team fairly recently; this was your third or fourth case at most, and none of them had been quite that… gruesome. Of course, you were well aware cases like that happened. It was only a matter of time before one came your way. Unfortunately.
“This motel totally looks like the kind of place where something like that happens on a daily basis,” Elle continued. “My advice? Don’t look under the beds tonight. Or in the closets, if there even are any.”
“I just hope there’s hot water,” Derek sighed, his voice carrying a tone of resignation. “We once ended up in a place that didn’t have any. I almost handed in my resignation.”
“You deal with gruesome murders every day, but no hot water is too much for you, Princess?” you raised an eyebrow, glancing at him out of the corner of your eye as you made your way toward the reception desk to pick up your room keys. The motel’s walls were yellow—not the cheerful sunflower or sunny kind of yellow, but more like dried-up cat pee yellow.
“He’s got a point, though,” Elle chimed in, taking the key from an elderly woman at the reception desk. “Think about it. You come back after a long, grueling day, from dawn to midnight, just like today. You’re exhausted, barely standing, and you can’t even take a hot shower.”
Morgan pointed at her and nodded in agreement. You shrugged.
“Cold isn’t that bad,” you muttered. Honestly, you hadn’t expected anything luxurious from the place you’d been sent to. It was just a few days, after all.
“Oh, are you one of those people practicing that millionaire morning routine?” Derek teased. “You know—waking up at three, cold shower, steak for breakfast, daily planning, self-help book…”
I just grew up poor, you thought to yourself, but aloud you only let out a short laugh.
“I’d kill to have time to read a book before work. Any book. Not to be yanked out of bed by Hotch at five, like today, and scrambling to get out the door.”
Elle and Morgan exchanged a very brief look, almost secretive. You narrowed your eyes, suspicion suddenly welling up inside you. Before you could ask about it, someone else spoke up.
“He called me at half past six,” Reid said, tilting his head in mild confusion.
Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed the others silencing him with a look.
“Hey, what’s going on?” you stopped in your tracks, demanding an explanation. “He called me half an hour earlier than the rest of you?”
“You live farther away.”
“We’re practically neighbors, Elle Greenaway.”
“I’m about to drop,” Derek suddenly interjected with theatrical exhaustion. A change of subject. A not-so-subtle change of subject. “If I don’t lie down soon, I’ll fall asleep standing up. See you all tomorrow, folks.”
“You’re absolutely right—sleep well.”
With that, he and Elle headed up the stairs to the third floor, where they’d been assigned rooms. You and, as it turned out, Reid were staying on the second floor.
You turned to him slowly, arms crossed over your chest.
You didn’t even need to say anything—your stern gaze alone made it clear you were waiting for an explanation. Reid looked like he was about to throw his hands up in a defensive gesture, clearly regretting that he’d brought up the topic at all.
“Okay,” he sighed nervously. “What I’m about to say is not meant to offend you in any way, not even the slightest…”
“Offend?” you repeated, furrowing your brow. “Jesus Christ, Reid, don’t look at me like that—I’m not about to punch you in the face…”
“It’s just…” he began, a little calmer now. “All of us, including Hotch, I assume, are aware of the fact that, occasionally—just sometimes—you have a slight tendency to…run a bit late to work.”
He looked at you, and a telling silence fell between you.
"Yesterday, you were fourteen and a half minutes late."
"Fifteen minutes doesn't count as being late. And have you heard of a grace period? It's allowed to arrive within that time frame, without any consequences."
"Fine. What about two days ago, twenty-one minutes and seventeen..."
"Metro malfunction. I had no control over that."
"And six days ago, on Tuesday? Twenty-four minutes and..."
"I don’t remember such a situation, because, Mr. Big Brain, not all of us have such a memory. But I assume there was a reason..."
"Alright, fine," Reid interrupted you calmly. "I’m not saying there wasn’t a reason. But still... it happens quite often, and that's a fact. So it’s no surprise that Hotch, when the situation especially calls for it, prefers to call you a little earlier than the rest. Just out of caution."
You sighed, no longer able to argue about it. Maybe he was right; you did sometimes lose track of time in the mornings or fail to wake up to the sound of your alarm, closing your eyes for an extra five minutes... which resulted in small delays. You had never been directly reprimanded for it, so you were unaware that it had become such a big issue. Slightly embarrassed, you pressed your lips together.
"As usual, I guess you're right. And by the way, I’m heading to my room. I had thirty minutes less sleep than all of you, I’m exhausted," you said in a lighter, joking tone. A brief smile crossed Reid’s face. "Good night, wise guy.”
"Good night. And don’t look under the bed."
"Believe me, I wasn’t planning on it!"
With those words, you both disappeared into rooms directly opposite each other. The sounds of doors closing synchronized. You started your usual evening routine, placing your suitcase in the corner of the room. It was really small, narrow, and rectangular. The walls had that same awful color, the light was too bright, causing a headache. So you decided to just turn on the night lamp on the shabby nightstand next to the single bed.
It turned out that the only bathroom was in the hallway. You almost cried; you didn't want to take all your things with you and then come back with them. You remembered that you'd taken a proper shower that morning, so maybe a repeat wasn’t absolutely necessary. You were too sleepy for it, so you just set the alarm for fifteen minutes earlier to do it in the morning. After changing into comfortable clothes, you immediately lay down on the bed. Following Elle’s advice, and then Reid’s too, you didn’t check what might be hiding under it.
You weren’t hiding it, you were a terrible sleeper. Falling asleep in new places usually wasn’t a problem for you, even if it was a place that looked like a dive where someone could stab you in your sleep. But that night, something was bothering you. After giving it some thought, you realized it was Reid’s words.
Of course, it wasn’t that you held it against him. He was just stating facts; he had no intention of offending you, as he assured. And you didn’t even feel offended. More like unpleasantly confronted with a certain fact. You had only been part of the BAU for a short time. Well, just a week ago Derek stopped calling you the new girl. Although on the outside, you came across as very confident, on the inside, you were preoccupied with the team’s opinion of you and what they might think about you. Mainly because they were all older and more experienced.
You were especially worried about the fact that your tardiness and chaos had drawn the boss’s attention. Being on good terms with your superior was incredibly important, in case something ever happened, in case you made a more serious mistake…those small things could influence how the rest of your career would unfold, and the decisions made about you.
But above all, you wanted everyone to like you. Simply like you. So you wouldn’t walk around every day with your heart in your throat, praying for the day to end, constantly overwhelmed by a sense of misfit and loneliness.
You turned to your side, not sure how long you had been lying there, thinking. Suddenly, you realized you had to pee.
With great reluctance and sleepiness, you reached for the bedside lamp to turn it on and go to the bathroom. However, when you tugged at the cord, it... didn’t turn on. The room remained shrouded in darkness. You tried once more, then blindly made your way to the light switch in the room. You pressed it, and nothing.
What was going on, a power outage?
You shook your head in confusion. Whatever was going on, it didn’t change the fact that you had to go to the bathroom. You remembered the flashlight in your jacket pocket, and in the darkness, it took you a while to find it. When you finally had it in your hand, you felt ready to complete the mission. To pee, that is.
The moment you stepped out into the hallway, a light source flared up right before your eyes. You let out a muffled exclamation, partly from surprise, partly from being almost blinded.
“Damn, sorry…” Reid hissed, equally confused, turning his flashlight downward, away from your face.
You rubbed your eyelids, turning off your flashlight. Two light sources were unnecessary.
“Is there no power for you too?” you asked.
Reid nodded. It was only then that you really looked at him—he was wearing very loose pajama pants and...
“Cute,” you clicked your tongue, pointing at his white sweater with a bear wearing glasses. He had them too, worn very low on his nose. He must have put them on absentmindedly, in the dark, right after getting out of bed.
“I got it from Penelope for my birthday,” he said in a tone as if he were giving a statement. His hand briefly touched the fabric, right at the center of the brown bear’s face. “It’s really comfortable and soft. Perfect for sleeping...Anyway, I was heading to the reception to find out what the issue is and whether anything can be done about it. You too?”
"No, I just really need to pee. Do you really want to go there at this hour?" you asked, raising an eyebrow in surprise. "I mean, outages happen, and they'll have to fix it, but it's the middle of the night. We don't really need the lights right now, and if you want to go to the bathroom, you have a flashlight, as I can see."
You kept your gaze on him, realizing that since he noticed the lack of light, he must have been either heading somewhere himself or keeping the light on. Or maybe he had been sleeping with the light on. He did seem a bit tense. One of his hands was still resting on the half-open door, nervously gripping it. The other was pressed tightly to his body, his chest rising in an odd rhythm. Not a quickened pace, like with a panic attack, but more unnatural, like he was trying to control it.
"Are you afraid of the dark?" the question slipped out of you directly. After a moment, you realized it might have been a little too blunt. You had asked it carelessly, suspecting there might be another reason behind his behavior. For some reason, fear of the dark didn’t seem to fit his rational character.
Reid quickly shook his head, firmly denying it.
"No. No, of course not. I was just... reading when the light went out."
Oh, you didn’t even need to be a profiler to see right away that he was lying. You crossed your arms, a little amused by how stubbornly he was denying it.
"You were reading? At this hour? When we’re back to the investigation first thing tomorrow morning?"
He shrugged, shaking his head again.
"I couldn’t sleep."
You sighed. In the end, neither his fear nor his shame were your concern, so you didn’t see the point in interrogating him any further. You signaled that you were dropping the subject, and some expression passed across his face. Gratitude. Gratitude for not pushing the issue or mocking him. You felt a bit offended that he had even thought you might do that.
“If you still plan on going to the reception, wait for me, I’ll go with you. I just need to quickly stop by the bathroom.”
Reid opened his mouth, clearly surprised by your suggestion.
“Well, what?” you replied with a shrug. “I can’t let something eat you on the way. A demonic hand emerging from the darkness…”
“Very funny,” he commented, rolling his eyes. However, the corner of his mouth twitched, and his breathing seemed calmer.
“…The ghost of Richard Ramirez haunting the walls of this hotel. Or some other bloodthirsty maniac.“
"Didn't you really have to pee badly?"
"The team wouldn’t recover from losing you, Reid!" You threw that line over your shoulder as you walked toward the bathroom.
Of course, there was no light there either, so you had to use your flashlight. He was waiting for you, and together, in silence, you headed down the stairs toward the reception. Given how small the motel was, it wasn’t open 24/7. You had to wait a while before someone came to assist you.
“That happens sometimes,” the employee shrugged. “We’re not sure where the problem is exactly, but someone’s supposed to come check it out tomorrow…”
“Can’t anything be done about it now?” Reid asked, a trace of frustration in his voice that he was trying to mask—especially when he glanced at you from the corner of his eye. “Maybe it’s just a simple overload? Where are the fuse boxes…?”
“Reid,” you said gently, placing a hand on his elbow to draw his full attention. He turned his head toward you, surprised by the tone of your voice. You gave the employee a discreet signal that you didn’t have any further questions and he could leave.
“You’re not fixing the electricity in some rundown motel. That would just be… ridiculous.”
“I’m not talking about fixing it,” he clarified quickly, though it was clear he hadn’t let go of the idea. “But in most cases, it’s just a simple short circuit. I could just take a look—”
“—Or you could just sleep in my room.”
The words left your mouth, surprising not only him but also yourself. Yet, it wasn’t as though you regretted them or wanted to take back the offer. On the contrary, the moment you said it out loud, it felt even more fitting. When you were a little kid—like most children, probably—you’d also been afraid of the dark, and running to someone else’s room always helped. Curling up beside someone, just knowing someone was there, made all the difference.
You watched his reaction, the way he shook his head slightly from side to side, a small frown creasing his forehead.
“You’re joking, right?”
“Not at all. Come on.” You grabbed him by the wrist—the hand not holding the flashlight—and pulled him along. He moved hesitantly, but he seemed too caught off guard to plant his feet and stay put.
He stopped only when you reached the door to your room, pulling his hand free from your grasp.
"How do you even imagine this working? There's... there's only one bed in there."
"If that bothers you, grab the mattress and some bedding from your room. You’ll hardly notice the difference—those beds are unbearably uncomfortable anyway."
He lowered the flashlight slightly, letting the surrounding darkness of the hallway creep over his face. It was barely visible now, but the hesitation etched on it was unmistakable. Standing across from him, you held his gaze without saying a word, silently reinforcing the fact that you weren’t joking.
The thought of him struggling to fall asleep for the rest of the night and then suffering through another day made you feel genuinely sorry for him. Besides, even though you hadn’t known each other long, you already considered him a sort of friend. If there was anything you could do to help, you wanted to do it.
"It's no big deal, Spencer," you reassured him one last time, hoping the words would finally sink in. "Really. And if you want... we don't ever have to talk about this again. Tomorrow, or ever."
His chest rose as he drew in a deep breath.
"Th-thank you," he said at last, cautiously, as though he'd packed so many thoughts into the single word that saying it out loud was an effort.
You smiled gently and understandingly. Before stepping into the room, you briefly placed a hand on his arm.
"Oh God, that sweater really is soft..."
He let out a short laugh, perhaps releasing a bit of the embarrassment he’d been holding back. You both disappeared into your respective rooms, and you lay down in bed, waiting for him to show up. Well, the moment dragged on a little too long.
You were almost certain he’d only agreed to your suggestion to get you off his back and had no intention of actually following through. Propping yourself up on one elbow, you debated whether to go to his room and drag him over or just let it go. They say you shouldn’t force help on others. Maybe there was some truth to that.
Shortly after that thought, your door creaked open slowly. You heard it but couldn’t see much—the room was too dark, and he wasn’t using his flashlight. Perhaps he assumed you were already asleep and didn’t want to risk waking you.
Either way, he moved around your bed to lay down a pillow and blanket on the floor, skipping the effort of hauling over an entire mattress. 
"Your back is going to hurt," you remarked softly, your voice adjusting to the rhythm of the night, blending with the surrounding darkness.
You lay on your side, facing the spot where he had set up his makeshift bed. All you could see was the outline of his figure, his hands clasped loosely over his stomach, head resting on the pillow. You even caught the slight shrug of his shoulders in response to your comment.
"Actually, sleeping on the floor can have health benefits. It helps maintain a neutral spine position," he replied.
“Seriously?” you scoffed. “Do you really have to come up with a counterargument for everything I say?”
“Such a curse of mine. If you don’t like it, well, you invited me here.”
“Annoying bastard. I guess it’s too late to kick you out?” you wondered aloud, of course, rhetorically. But you quickly added, worried that he might take it seriously, “Sleep well. You and your spine.”
An amused sigh escaped him.
 “You… and your spine too.”
Well, you guessed that's enough of the chit-chat. You felt a bit disappointed, but you had brought him here for a reason. To let him sleep, not to entertain you with conversation. To your surprise, you didn’t feel sleepy, even though you had struggled with it earlier. You had been thinking about... hard to even pinpoint what, there were a few things. The little worries typical of the night, suddenly growing to some huge proportions.
You were still lying in the same position, some time had passed. Your cheek was almost touching the edge of the bed, on the same side where Reid slept. Well, actually, he wasn’t sleeping. You could see a faint, barely noticeable gleam of his open eyes. They were cast downward, trying not to stare into the empty blackness above his head.
“Have you always been afraid of the dark?” you decided to ask, with no sarcasm.
“I’m not afraid,” he replied, though he could always pretend to be asleep. But the answer came out automatically.
“Alright, brave guy.” You didn’t even scoff, you just said it calmly and accepting. Maybe later he’ll tell you, when he stops being so embarrassed about it. “So, I guess you came here to get to know me better. And you know, I think you’ve got the chance. Could you... could you tell me something? Just honestly?”
"Me?" he asked, surprised, even sitting up slightly. "I mean... sure. But what?"
You suddenly sighed, regretting even bringing up the topic. God, that was so stupid...
"Just remember, honestly. Do you think the rest of the team likes me?"
Reid was silent, a strange feeling gathered in your stomach. Instead of answering negatively, he propped himself up on both elbows, and you saw a slight movement of his head. A nod.
"Are you asking this completely seriously?"
You shrugged, not sure if he noticed, so you confirmed out loud in a slightly hoarse voice. And then, to your absolute surprise, he just laughed.
"I don’t get it," he confessed after a short moment during which you stared in silence at his silhouette. "How... how could you think it could be any different? You’re always joking with Derek and Elle, and... we get along well too, I hope..."
"You’re right. But... but that’s not what I meant, I just... ugh, seriously, I can’t explain it. Fine, you know what, never mind."
You turned onto your back, as if that would completely sever the conversation. The one you’d stupidly started. You hoped he wouldn’t mention it to anyone. Another stupid thought, after all, he wasn’t like that.
Silence again, broken only by breaths. A new sound joined them, a slight rustle of the sheets. When Reid spoke again, his voice sounded somehow higher, and you were sure he was sitting on the floor as he said it.
"It might be a little surprising, but when I was a kid, I wasn't afraid of the dark," he began, completely changing the tone of his voice. He wasn't surprised like before; it was lower, gentler, despite the topic he was addressing. "I mean, I wasn't afraid of it more than any other kid my age. That... that serious fear, the real fear, started later. I don't want to say it was when I started working for the BAU because that wouldn't be entirely true. But it was around the time I started taking everything seriously. Seeing it with my own eyes, every day."
You didn't even realize when you had turned back onto your side, just to look at him, listening to his words.
"Do you have nightmares?" you asked.
"Sometimes. Actually..." he sighed, swallowing. "All of it, the fear and the nightmares, it's like they don't exist when I'm in a place I know. A place I trust. I can sleep just fine with the lights off in my apartment, the same in a jet. Everything starts in places like this. “
There was silence from your side, and you felt a bit… touched that he decided to tell you this. No beating around the bush, no lying, and, most importantly, no overwhelming embarrassment. It was a normal topic after all; everyone has their fears.
"And you?"
"What about me?"
"Do you have nightmares?"
In the first few days after starting the job, you did. Then they stopped. That’s just how things go, you suppose.
"Not anymore," you admitted, letting out a small laugh. "But that doesn’t mean I sleep well. Now I just worry at night."
"About whether the team likes you?"
"Okay, I know it sounds childish, but it’s really been bothering me lately. They might… they might seem to like me, but deep down, they might not think that highly of me. I… I'm new, not that experienced, I’m always late, and I don’t think I’m bringing anything new to the table..."
"Of course, you’re bringing something," he interrupted you. You hadn’t noticed when, but you were both sitting up now. Your voices weren’t sleepy whispers anymore, you were having a real conversation. "Each of us brings something different, something characteristic of ourselves. That's how it works in a team. That’s why you’re here. Without you… okay, you might not know this, but since you’ve been here, these last four cases have gone much more smoothly."
"Do you really think so?" 
"Well, you asked me to be honest. Completely honest."
You've always had a bit of imposter syndrome, doubting your abilities, and approaching others' positive comments about you or your achievements with skepticism. 
Something in the way he spoke, his quick words, his engagement in them... made you believe him, somehow.
"Reid," you began, surprised to find that there was less weight in your chest, in your body. "I know, I just know, that you'll refuse, but still, I'll ask. Do you want to lie down with me?"
You didn't even know what exactly prompted the question. Caring about your back, you could answer. But was that really all it was?
For a moment, he was silent, thinking you were joking, but when it dawned on him that you weren't, he scoffed.
"Well, you were right, I'll refuse..."
"Sorry, but I doubt you'll fall asleep any other way. I was watching you, as creepy as that sounds. You were lying there with your eyes open, you were scared."
"I'm an adult man who's afraid of the dark. That's pathetic on its own, without being tucked to sleep by a coworker."
"I never mentioned anything about tucking you in."
He hesitated, embarrassed. 
"You took the least important part of my statement..."
"I took what I wanted. The rest is nonsense. Your age doesn't determine what you can or can't be afraid of. I'm a grown woman, and I'm afraid my colleagues don't like me. Which sounds more pathetic, huh? Fear of the dark or that?"
“I think it’s a point we could argue about for hours.”
“Which we don’t have. It’s late, we should go to sleep. Quick question, are you lying down with me, or are you fooling yourself into thinking you’ll fall asleep without it?”
A heavy, resigned sigh escaped him. Without adding anything else to his words, you turned onto your side, your back to him. You heard the rustling of the sheets, and for a moment, you froze, surprised. But no, he hadn’t joined you. 
You weren’t sure how you felt. Disappointed seemed like too strong a word. It wasn’t as though he had refused some incredibly important request of yours. It was just… perhaps the best explanation would be that, once you had convinced him to sleep in the same room for the sake of helping him, you wanted him to take something comforting from that night. You wanted it to be one of those good nights, like the ones he had in his apartment or in the jet, the ones he had mentioned. Not one of the others, filled with fear.
But then, the mattress beside you dipped, as someone else settled onto it.
You turned to the other side, and suddenly your faces were right across from each other. Reid swallowed, almost nervously. He seemed to be adjusting to the situation, to the sudden closeness, the small space you shared. You propped your hand under your head, observing him discreetly. It hit you that he always had a bit of an issue with contact with others. A doubt crossed your mind: had you made him uncomfortable?
Minutes passed, though, and his body seemed to sink more comfortably into the bed. His arms were no longer stiff, his hands resting freely, no longer clasped tightly across his chest. You could also hear his breath, and the more peaceful it became, the calmer you felt too.
And even though no words seemed necessary anymore, he decided to speak once again.
"Thank you."
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rootedinrevisions · 2 months ago
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Just...Stay
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SUMMARY: When he rolls back into her life every few months, Tyler Owens brings with him all the irresistible charm and warmth that first captured her heart, leaving her breathless and hoping for more. But as the years slip by, so do his promises, and every departure leaves her with another fracture in her heart and fewer illusions about the man she loves. Caught between the comfort of the life she’s built and the pull of the only man who’s ever felt like home, she must finally decide: will she wait for him one last time, or find the courage to let go and forge a path on her own? PART 2 HERE
Inspired loosely by "All the Cowboys" by Alexandra Kay.
WORD COUNT: 4.6k
WARNINGS: Angst. Unrequited love. Mentions of/Implied Smut.
TAG LIST: SEE COMMENTS
If you would like to be added to any of my Tag Lists or be tagged for a specific character please feel free to comment, send an ask, or send a DM and I'll be happy to get you added! Below are the fandoms I currently write for.
Glen Powell (himself and the characters he's played)
Twisters (Mostly Tyler right now, but possibly others soon)
Top Gun: Maverick (Hangman, Rooster, possibly others soon)
Marvel / MCU (Bucky Barnes as of now, but possibly others soon)
WWE / Wrestling
The screen door creaked as you settled onto the back porch steps, the sun beginning to dip beneath the horizon. You held the phone close, balancing it between your shoulder and ear as you traced absent circles on the weathered wood with your fingertip.
Your mom’s voice crackled on the other end, warm and familiar. “You’ve been keeping busy out there?”
A faint smile tugged at the corners of your lips. “Yeah, Mama. Got a load of wash done, fixed that fence post that was leaning. Even tried to fix the gutter on the barn.”
She chuckled. “You sound like you’re doing just fine then. So, what’s got you out on that porch, calling me like you got the weight of the world on your shoulders?”
You hesitated, glancing out at the fields stretching endlessly before you, caught between the quiet beauty of dusk and the ache you felt blooming inside. “I don’t know, Mama,” you said, almost whispering. “Just feeling a little lost, I guess.”
There was a long pause on the other end, and you could almost hear her piecing it together. “You saw him again, didn’t you?”
A sigh escaped you, a mix of regret and resignation. “Yeah, I did. He was just… there, like nothing had changed.” You shook your head, remembering the way he’d looked at you, that familiar glint in his eye. “I know what you’re gonna say, Mama.”
She didn’t hesitate. “That boy’s no good. He comes ‘round whenever he pleases, but he leaves just as quick. You can’t be holding out for someone like that, honey.”
You felt your chest tighten, the truth of her words hitting harder than you’d like to admit. “I know, Mama. Believe me, I know.” You picked at a loose thread on your sleeve, fingers fidgeting. “But when he’s here… it’s like I forget all that. I forget how many times he’s done this before, how I feel every time he leaves.” Your voice grew softer, thick with frustration. “And then he’s gone, and it feels like… like there’s this empty spot he left behind.”
There was a pause before she spoke again, her voice gentle but firm. “Why do you let him do this to you, sweetheart?”
You exhaled slowly, shoulders slumping. “I don’t know. Maybe I keep hoping it’ll be different. That maybe… he’ll stay.” The words sounded hollow even as you said them.
You could feel her weighing her response, the silence heavy between you. “Honey, some people just aren’t made to stay. They get what they need and they’re gone, leaving folks like you to pick up the pieces.” She paused, and you could almost see her shaking her head. “But that doesn’t make it right.”
A lump formed in your throat as you thought of Tyler driving off into the sunset, no promises, no goodbyes—just gone. You let out a weary breath, looking down at the chipped paint on the porch step beneath you. 
“Why do they always leave, Mama? Every time things get good, he just vanishes.”
“Oh, honey…” She sighed, the sound deep and knowing. “It’s in some folks’ nature to chase what they don’t have, always looking for something else just over the next hill. Doesn’t mean you have to keep getting hurt by it, though.”
You closed your eyes, feeling the truth settle heavily in your chest. The silence stretched on, filled only by the chirping of crickets and the fading warmth of the sun. You knew your mother was right, but as you sat there, a small part of you still hoped that maybe, just maybe, he’d come back one day and stay.
The memory came back in a slow, aching wave. Just two nights ago, you and Tyler lay tangled up together under the sheets, his arm wrapped tightly around you. The world felt quiet in those moments, like the whole world had shrunk to just the two of you, his warm skin against yours, his heartbeat steady beneath your cheek.
You tilted your head up to look at him, his face softened in the dim light. “So… how long are you sticking around this time?” you asked, half-joking, though you both knew the question carried a heavier weight.
Tyler’s gaze drifted, his lips twitching in that familiar, evasive way. “Maybe longer this time,” he mumbled, though he couldn’t quite meet your eyes when he said it. Instead, his thumb traced absent circles over your shoulder, a touch meant to soothe but only deepening the pit forming in your stomach.
You wanted to believe him, wanted to hold on to that maybe, but his tone, that shift in his eyes as he looked away—it was the same pattern, the same script. You’d been through this dance too many times not to recognize the truth hiding behind his words. He would be gone by morning. And as much as he’d tried to sell you that soft maybe, the two of you understood this wasn’t a visit that would last.
But in that moment, as you curled up against his side, you pretended you didn’t know. You buried yourself in the warmth of his embrace, letting yourself have just one night, pretending you wouldn’t wake up alone.
And sure enough, the next morning, when your hand reached across the bed to his side, it found nothing but cool sheets. You stared at the empty space beside you, that hollow ache settling deep in your chest. With a sigh, you threw back the covers and padded over to the closet, grabbing one of his old T-shirts he’d left on one of his previous stays, back when you still believed he might keep leaving pieces of himself behind to build something more permanent with you.
The shirt smelled faintly of him, a hint of cedar and summer nights that made your throat tighten. Tugging it over your head, you went to the kitchen, the floor cold against your bare feet as you filled the kettle, automatically going through the motions of your morning coffee.
And that’s when you saw it—the note, lying in the center of the kitchen table, his handwriting scrawled across the torn piece of paper.
It was a short message, just a handful of words that were supposed to feel like a promise, but instead felt like one more empty reassurance. You picked it up, reading the rushed lines that only served to emphasize his absence.
Didn’t want to wake you. Take care, darlin’. I’ll see you around.
The words felt flimsy, like the paper might disintegrate under the weight of your disappointment. You crumpled the note in your fist, feeling the familiar sting behind your eyes. This wasn’t new—this cycle of him drifting in, leaving pieces of himself in the form of old T-shirts and half-hearted promises, only to vanish before you could say goodbye.
You’d been through this so many times before, and yet, as you stood there, clutching that note, you couldn’t help but wonder if maybe this time was the one that would finally break you.
Your mom’s voice cut through the silence, gentle but firm. “Honey, you still there?”
You blinked, realizing you’d let the silence drag on too long, your mind caught in the weight of memories you could barely hold onto. “Yeah, Mama,” you murmured, swallowing down the lump in your throat.
“I know you love him,” she continued softly, but her words carried a strength you weren’t sure you had anymore. “But I need you to ask yourself if he’s treating you like he loves you, too. ’Cause, baby, love isn’t something you only hold onto when it’s convenient. It’s there in the hard times, in the moments that aren’t so pretty. And if he’s not showing up for you… maybe it’s time to ask yourself why you’re still waiting.”
You nodded even though she couldn’t see you, staring down at the crumpled note still clutched in your hand. The truth of her words was painful, like a splinter lodged too deep to pull out.
“I know,” you whispered. “I know you’re right.”
“I just hate seeing you go through this, time and again,” she said, her voice tinged with a sorrow that made your chest ache. “You deserve someone who’s there for you, who doesn’t keep running just because things start feeling real.”
You exhaled, forcing a smile that felt as brittle as glass. “Thanks, Mama. I… I just needed to hear that.”
“Anytime, baby,” she said, her tone softening. “You take care of yourself. And remember, it’s okay to let go.”
After a quiet goodbye, you hung up, setting the phone down beside the note. Your mom’s words echoed in your mind, a steady reminder of what you deserved, a grounding tether pulling you back to reality. She was right, of course. She always was. And yet…No matter how many times he left, or how much you knew he wasn’t treating you the way you deserved, there was still a part of you—a foolish, stubborn part—that couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like if he stayed. Just once.
You closed your eyes, letting the bittersweet ache of a daydream settle over you, imagining what it would be like if he stayed. Just once.
You could almost feel him there beside you, his arm still wrapped around you as you stirred awake. In this vision, his side of the bed wasn’t empty; he was there, his breathing slow and steady, a soft smile tugging at his lips as you rolled over to nuzzle closer. The warmth of his body against yours made you feel safe, grounded, as though he was finally, truly yours.
Later, you pictured the two of you in the kitchen, the early light streaming in through the window as you handed him a mug of coffee. He’d take it, wrapping his hands around yours just a second longer than necessary, his fingers warm against your skin. You’d share a quiet laugh over something simple, something easy, while the steam curled between you. And as he sat across from you, his eyes would linger like he was savoring the moment, like he was savoring you.
In your mind, you watched as he’d finish his coffee, rising from the table to head out to the fields with you. He’d tug on a worn cap and grin over his shoulder, his eyes crinkling in that way that always made your heart stumble. You’d walk side by side, falling into the comfortable rhythm of working together, your boots crunching over the soil as you talked about things that never came up in his fleeting visits. What you’d plant next season, what you’d add to the place if you had the time and the money. He’d joke about the future, and for once, you’d let yourself believe in it.
Evenings would come, and you’d find yourselves on the back porch, watching the sun dip below the horizon, casting a warm glow over everything. He’d reach for your hand, lacing his fingers through yours as if it were the most natural thing in the world. You could almost feel the weight of his head resting against yours, his soft murmur of how he’d missed this, missed you. And as night fell, the stars would come out, and he’d pull you close, wrapping you in his arms as though he had nowhere else to be.
And then, in this daydream, he’d follow you back inside, his arm draped around your shoulders as you led him up to bed. There, tangled up in the sheets, he’d hold you close, his touch lingering and gentle, making you feel like you were the only person who’d ever mattered to him. His whispered promises wouldn’t be half-hearted or hesitant; they’d be real, as solid as the feel of his heartbeat beneath your fingertips. You’d fall asleep in his arms, knowing he’d be there when you woke, that he’d finally found a place with you he wouldn’t leave behind.
But as you opened your eyes, the reality settled around you like a familiar chill. It was just a daydream, a vision of something you’d never have, as fleeting as his footprints fading from the dirt driveway. And yet, you couldn’t help but hold onto it for one more heartbeat, wishing with all the fragile hope you had left that someday, somehow, it could be real.
* * * * *
A MONTH LATER
It was a late afternoon, the sun dipping low and casting long shadows over the gravel drive as you stood on the porch, the distant rumble of an engine reaching your ears. You recognized that sound before you even saw the dust cloud rising in the distance, stirring up memories you’d been trying to put to rest for weeks. His truck rounded the last bend, and there he was, windows down, that easy, rugged grin spreading across his face as he slowed to a stop in front of the house.
Tyler stepped out, stretching his arms like he belonged there, like he hadn’t left you picking up the pieces last time. Dust clung to his boots as he walked toward you, his eyes fixed on yours with that familiar spark—one that made you feel seen in a way that was hard to shake, even when you wanted to.
He looked just the same, though maybe a little more sun-worn, his t-shirt clinging to his shoulders, his jeans frayed in a way that was somehow endearing, like they’d seen as much of the road as he had. He stopped a few steps away, his gaze softening as it met yours.
“Hey,” he said, voice warm and low, as if no time had passed at all.
You stayed still, hands clenched by your sides. You’d prepared yourself for this—told yourself a hundred times that if he showed up again, you’d keep your distance, guard the pieces of your heart he kept leaving behind. But as he stood there you felt the walls you’d built begin to crack.
“Hey,” you replied, the word catching in your throat.
A beat of silence hung between you, heavy with all the things left unsaid. Then his face softened, his smile widening in that way that always undid you. And, as if by instinct, he reached for you, his hand lifting to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing your skin with a gentleness that felt almost like an apology.
For a moment, you considered stepping back, holding onto the anger and hurt that had filled the empty space he left behind. But as his touch settled, as his thumb traced a line just below your cheekbone, all your defenses crumbled.
Before you knew it, you were reaching back, your hand settling over his as you let yourself lean into him. It was like slipping back into a familiar dream—the one where he stayed, where he was yours for longer than a fleeting moment.
He pulled you closer, his arms wrapping around you, and you sank into his embrace, feeling the weight of his chin against your hair, the steady beat of his heart beneath your ear. And in that moment, against all reason, you let yourself believe that maybe this time would be different, that maybe he’d come back not just to leave again, but to finally stay.
He held you close, his arms wrapped around you with that familiar, unguarded tenderness. His chin rested on top of your head, and for a moment, it felt as if the world beyond his embrace had faded away. His fingers traced slow circles on your back, a quiet, grounding rhythm that felt as real as his voice when he finally spoke, low and rough against your hair.
“I missed you,” he murmured, the words so soft you almost didn’t catch them. He shifted, pulling back just enough to meet your gaze, his eyes searching yours. “I’m glad to see you again.”
You looked away for a moment, the words stirring both warmth and ache deep in your chest. It was unfair, the way he could come and go, the way he could leave you longing for more, but when he looked at you like that—with his guard down, that rugged charm softened by something raw and honest—it was hard to hold onto your resolve.
“I missed you too,” you whispered back, barely able to meet his gaze. He smiled at that, a slow, almost relieved smile, as if he’d feared he might’ve lost his place in your heart.
He let his hand drift to yours, his fingers lacing through yours in a familiar gesture. “Come on,” he said, tugging you gently, “let’s make a day of it.”
With Tyler by your side, you found yourself lost in the rhythm of farm chores that felt lighter, easier, with him there. He was quick to lend a hand, reaching for the same tools you did, working alongside you with that easy, capable grace he seemed to carry everywhere.
You walked through rows of vegetables, pulling up the last of the summer crops, the sun warm against your skin. Tyler watched as you tossed a few stray weeds into a pile, a hint of amusement in his gaze.
“So,” you asked, breaking the comfortable silence, “how’s the team? Boone, Lily, Dani, Dexter?”
He chuckled, swiping a smudge of dirt from his forearm. “They’re all good. Wild as ever. Boone’s still dragging his feet over settling down, though I keep telling him he’s a fool if he lets Lily go. And Dani’s got herself a new truck she’s way too proud of. Dexter? Well, you know him; he’s just happy to tag along for the adventure.”
You smiled at the thought of his friends, feeling a pang of longing for the life he lived—a world of movement and adventure, so different from the one you held steady here. “They sound like they’re keeping you busy.”
“Yeah, they do.” He looked at you, a softness to his expression that made your heart skip. “But they’re not the only ones.”
“What do you mean?”
“Been thinking about you too, you know. Wondering what you’re up to when I’m gone.” He paused, glancing around the fields before adding, “How’s your mom doing?”
You swallowed, touched that he remembered to ask. “She’s good. Stubborn as ever, trying to do too much on her own. But we manage.”
He nodded thoughtfully, reaching out to steady you when you stumbled on a loose patch of earth. “You’ve got your hands full, don’t you?”
“Guess so,” you said, shrugging with a small smile. “But I wouldn’t have it any other way.”
He looked at you then, his gaze lingering, as if taking in the way you belonged here, rooted to this land and this life. For a moment, you thought he might say something more, but he only squeezed your hand, wordlessly acknowledging that unspoken divide between his world and yours.
Later, after a simple dinner you’d shared at the kitchen table, you both made your way out to the porch as the sun dipped low in the sky. He settled onto the swing beside you, letting his arm drape casually over the back of it as you leaned against him, feeling the warmth of his shoulder beneath your cheek.
The evening was calm, the colors of the sunset stretching across the horizon in soft shades of pink and orange, and you found yourself sighing into the quiet.
“This…this is nice,” you murmured, glancing up at him.
Tyler gave a soft hum of agreement, his thumb tracing small, comforting circles along your shoulder. “Could get used to it,” he said, his voice soft, as if testing the thought aloud. “It’s different from the rush of things out there. Being here with you—it just feels right.”
The words settled between you, gentle and unassuming, but laced with a longing that you felt all too acutely. He looked down, catching your gaze, his eyes holding yours in the fading light.
“I know you’ve got your life on the road,” you said, trying to keep your voice steady. “But sometimes I wonder…what it’d be like if you stayed.”
He didn’t answer right away, his gaze drifting out over the fields that stretched into the distance. Finally, he gave a small nod. “I think about it too. More than you know.”
You fell into a comfortable silence, his arm around you, your head resting on his shoulder as the last light slipped below the horizon. And in that quiet moment, you let yourself imagine a world where he was yours—not just for today, but for all the days and nights to come.
In the quiet glow of the fading sunset, Tyler’s gaze grew heavy, lingering on yours with a kind of tenderness that always seemed to pull you in too deep, too fast. And in a heartbeat, he was scooping you up, lifting you effortlessly into his arms as you laughed, breathless and already feeling the rush of surrender. He carried you down the hallway, his eyes never leaving yours, each step filling the space with anticipation you could feel in every beat of your heart.
The bed was cool beneath you as he laid you gently on the sheets, his body following close, as if he couldn’t bear the thought of any distance between you. His hands were careful yet urgent as he traced familiar paths along your skin, murmuring against your ear, his voice low and rough with want. 
“You’re beautiful, you know that?” he whispered, his breath warm against your neck, sending a shiver down your spine. You closed your eyes, letting the sound of his voice wash over you, feeling the weight of his words settle deep in your chest. “I’m lucky,” he murmured, his lips brushing your collarbone. “I’m the luckiest damn man alive that you’re mine.”
You wanted to believe him. You wanted to cling to those words and tuck them away, to let them soothe every doubt he’d left behind. But you pushed the ache aside, banishing it to some quiet corner of your mind where it couldn’t reach you now.
Instead, you let yourself get lost in him, in the way his hands knew every inch of you, how his touch left you dizzy, breathless, like you were the only thing that mattered in his world. Every whispered word, every gentle kiss pressed to your skin, they all felt like a spell you couldn’t break. And for that one perfect night, you let yourself believe that maybe, just maybe, he was telling the truth.
Afterward, as you lay tangled together in the sheets, your body pressed close to his, his arm wrapped around you, it was almost easy to forget. To ignore the hollow ache in your chest and pretend that this time, he wouldn’t slip away with the sunrise. And so, for those last quiet hours before dawn, you let yourself exist in that fragile, fleeting moment, letting go of everything but him.
The soft sound of Tyler stirring pulled you from the haze of sleep. You opened your eyes to see him sitting on the edge of the bed, already reaching for his clothes. The early morning light filtered through the window, casting a soft glow over his figure as he moved quietly, carefully separating your clothes from his in the pile by the bed. For a moment, you wanted to reach out, to pull him back, to press your face into his shoulder and beg him to stay. But something in you had finally had enough.
He noticed you were awake, glancing over his shoulder with a soft smile that you’d once let yourself believe was meant just for you. Leaning down, he pressed a kiss to the top of your head, his hand brushing over your shoulder. 
“Go back to sleep,” he murmured. “You need the rest.”
But you couldn’t—not anymore. Watching him move through the room, watching him get ready to leave again as if it were just another morning, you felt something inside you finally shift, that last fragile bit of hope you’d clung to finally snapping.
Sitting up, you took a steadying breath. “Tyler,” you said, your voice quiet but steady. He looked over, a hint of surprise in his eyes at your tone. You struggled to keep your voice even, the words tangled in your throat. “I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep waiting for someone who always leaves when things start to feel... real.”
He stilled, the easy expression on his face fading as the weight of your words sank in. You saw the conflict in his eyes, the same struggle you’d seen a dozen times before, but this time you weren’t going to let it end with an unspoken understanding. You were done with the quiet promises, the hope that somehow, one day, he might change.
“Stay,” you whispered, feeling the tears prick at your eyes. “Just... stay. I’m not asking you to give up chasing. I just want you to come home—to make this your home. To choose me.”
He looked at you, something like regret flickering in his gaze, but he couldn’t bring himself to say the words you wanted. 
Instead, he let out a shaky breath and looked down, and when he looked back up, all he managed was, “I’m sorry.” And you knew, in those two words, he’d already made his choice.
As he turned and started for the door, you found yourself following him, your steps echoing in the silence of the house as you trailed him through the hallway, the kitchen, the living room—all the way out onto the porch. You watched as he opened the truck door, throwing his bag into the backseat like he had a hundred times before.
“Don’t come back,” you said, the words escaping before you could stop them. Your voice wavered but held firm, steady with a finality that startled even you. 
He froze, his hand on the truck door, then turned to look at you. There was a flicker of something in his eyes—shock, maybe even hurt—as he crossed the driveway and came back up the steps, stopping just a few feet away.
“You don’t mean that, darlin’,” he said, his voice low and careful, as if he could talk you back from the edge. “You’re upset, I get that, but... you don’t mean it.”
But you shook your head. “I do, Tyler. I can’t keep doing this. If you’re not choosing me, then... then don’t come back.”
He held your gaze, searching for something, as if hoping to see the softness he’d come to rely on. But when he only saw your resolve, he let out a sigh, his shoulders sagging ever so slightly. 
“I’ll call you later,” he murmured. “We’ll talk.”
And just like that, he’d told you everything you needed to know. You didn’t need a call. You didn’t need another apology. You’d waited long enough.
You stood on the porch, watching as he climbed back into his truck. He didn’t look back as he drove down the driveway, the morning sun casting his truck in a halo of light as he disappeared into the Kansas countryside. You watched until he was just a speck on the horizon, your heart breaking and mending all at once with the realization that this was truly goodbye.
You’d loved him with everything you had, but you knew now that you couldn’t keep waiting for him to choose you. And when the phone finally rang, you knew you wouldn’t pick it up. Not this time. Not ever again. Because the next time he came back, you’d be moved on, ready to start again without him.
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jj-one · 9 months ago
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HOW JUNGKOOK WOULD TREAT HIS BIMBO GF 🍥
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pairing: established relationship, bf!Jungkook x bimbo!fem!reader genre/tags: smut, dumbification, degradation, praise kink, breeding kink, piv, unprotected sex, an*l, oral (m receiving), t*tty f*cking, drooling, use of the word daddy (only once)
**old repost from my deleted blog (05/24/23)
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- Having a drop dead gorgeous girlfriend was a given for Jungkook, he loved the fact that y’all were both smoking hot and turn heads everywhere you go
- The stark contrast between your appearances drove him insane
- His aesthetic was more dark and mystique, is also heavily tattooed while you always wore pink and pastels, having bare skin
- Is so enamored with the idea of you being the total opposite of him, he always feels like he’s corrupting your sweet innocence
- Kinda treats you like you’re his eye candy anywhere he goes, has you wrapped up on his arm like it’s a leash
- He’s been debating getting an actual leash for you since you constantly trip and fall whenever you’re out with him
- You were just so ditzy and clumsy… it was your character flaw yet Jungkook saw it as an endearing quality
- Also loved that you were an airhead, clingy, and always wanting his attention ;( makes the joy of him coming home to you all the more thrilling <33
- Always buying you pink and girly thingsss
- Whenever he sees something hello kitty or barbie related he instantly thinks of you and buys it
- CONSTANTLY wants to spoil you, omg this man would spend every dime he could on you just to make you happy
- He looooves taking you out shopping because that’s your favorite activity !!
- He splurged on you the other day, buying you any color of that Dior lip oil that you were obsessed with, it was worth it since he’d be the one taking it off your lips afterwards
- Jungkook enjoys watching you try on skimpy outfits for him, the shorter the skirt the better— don’t get him started on the way your hardened nipples peek out the fabric of your shirts…
- Likes to play dress up with you like you’re his personal doll
- He’ll put you in a pink lace slip dress one night and the next he’ll have you wear white see-through lingerie for him; that is only when you two are in private of course
- Frequently teaches you new things so you keep up to date with current news and other events, he knows you aren’t the brightest but you have a heart of gold and do your best to comprehend everything he tells you !
- When watching movies you often pause to ask questions about the film because you don’t get it
- Jungkook made you watch ‘Inception’ with him one time and it absolutely rotted your brain
- He enjoys explaining the movie to you in a babying way, dumbing it down for you to understand it as your mind is blown away by all the knowledge he drops on you
- Laughs at your inability to comprehend the plot and pats your head while teasing you
- “Awww, you poor little thing…can’t even understand the simple concept of a movie.”
- It really really really turns him on when you wear high heels, the higher the heels the higher the tent in his pants grew
- You wore the sexiest 6-inch stripper heels for him and he fucked you out completely while you had them on, he thinks he might have a heel fetish or something
- Absolutely adores your bright & bubbly personality !! Will praise you any time he hears you say something smart
- “Did you know that Sloths can hold their breath longer than Dolphins???” You would ask him randomly.
- “No I didn’t, but thanks for the fun fact babe. You sound so cute when you talk about things you’ve discovered.”
- “It was on the back of my Snapple cap, how cool is that?! See look!!”
- He will never not be impressed by your lack of awareness, you lived in your own little bubble and he wanted to shield you from all harm and scary things
- Is sooo completely obsessed with your body
- Your bouncy tits, your curvaceous hips, and your cute plump butt was the perfect sight to send the blood rushing to his cock
- Loves. To. Fuck. You. So. Dumb.
- Uses your hole like it’s a fleshlight and loves cumming inside you repeatedly
- Dumping all his cum into your little bimbo cunt was the only thing he needed in his life
- Often catches you drooling at him, when you do this he scoops it up with his finger and puts it back in your mouth
- His favorite part of sex with you is seeing your fucked out face
- The stare you give him while you deepthroat his cock was enough to make him combust
- “Look so pretty with my cock stuffed in your mouth, such a pretty little slut for me..”
- The way he would degrade you but praise you in the same breath confused you in many ways yet you enjoyed every minute of it
- Your makeup would be all smeared, mascara would be runny, the Dior lip gloss he bought you fully transferred to his cock now
- Can never choose between if he likes doggystyle or cowgirl more since both positions he gets to look at your assets with a nice view
- Lots of titty fucking, loves having your big round tits around his cock, making a mess all over your chest once you milk him clean
- He owns all your holes, he likes to use your tight little ass from time to time
- After lubing it up nice and gently, he would go to town on your ass just pounding into your fuck hole viciously
- “What a fucking whore you are, gonna keep fucking your tiny hole until I pump every last bit of my seed in you.”
- Turns him on so fucking much when you start babbling and unable to speak proper sentences
- You’d whimper and hiccup with frustration from the way his cock made you feel
- His love language will always be making you feel so low. So small compared to him that you don’t even feel worthy of his presence at times
- “Can’t stop drooling all over yourself? Already too dumb and fucked out to continue, hmm?? Oh never mind, you’re already dumb…just shut up and take daddy’s cock like the good little slut you are, you were made for taking cock anyway.”
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emptyjunior · 1 year ago
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Can I say how much I love how Ouran High School handles the rich boy/poor girl in love trope. 
Like I absolutely believe it’s discussions about classism and elitism to this Day still hold up! 
I will admit there is so much weird stuff in ouran😭, but we see the Handsome ‘Unlimited Money’ Male Lead a LOT in anime and I feel ouran gets a lot of points of the characterisation SO right, that a lot of other shows just don’t! 
Ouran does the whole love story/harem/all the boys want brown hair girl that we project on, trope. Like they do that, but they show that at the foundation, the root of all of it, those rich boys are JEALOUS. They aren’t approaching Haruhi with the need to protect and own her, at their core the rich are envious of her! Even though they have everything, they want what she has! 
Like we see in the real world with how the rich cosplay as poor! And say "ohhhh I'm so broke please venmo me for lunch" and wear their ripped jeans and strained sweaters and take pictures at the met gala with a box of McDonalds fries in their hand. 
The classist comments made towards Haruhi ARE comedic relief, but the joke isn’t on characters like Haruhi, the joke is on THEM. 
They are the ones who can’t do anything! They are the ones who are stilted and emotionally closed off! They are the ones who can’t make an instant coffee or go to a mall without help! 
THAT is why Haruhi is the center of this harem, why she is the one they’re chasing. They are jealous of her insight and world experience from living independently, from living a REAL life. That is her enviable trait. Haruhi GETS people! And they don’t. Their wealth has isolated them and now there is a barrier between these characters and the rest of the world and they have no idea how to navigate it. 
And this is the foundation of 90% of the problems/conflict in the show! 
The holiday ep when Hikaru has feelings because Haruhi reconnects with Nice Guy Arai? Hikaru says he doesn’t like this guy for all these reasons and most of them are like ‘he’s just some nobody from nothing who only knows Haruhi cause they went to some stupid public school together’. Like okay? Haruhi has all of those ‘bad traits’ as well but you still seem to like her?  
Because it’s not about that, it’s never about that, it’s not even about the love rival/romance angle (at least not completely).  
Hikaru is scared and embarrassed! He already was when they got there, when these rich boys crashed Haruhi’s summer to find out she is an employee here and she is working with her own two hands. This is not a break for her! And then he’s so worried when Haruhi and Arai find each other because what they have is so untouchable to him. Same background, same class, they can meet each other’s needs! And know the other's needs! And this is a chasm that Hikaru has no idea how to cross so he starts lashing out. 
And that episode concludes with Hikaru being told about Haruhi’s fear of thunderstorms, finally actually listening and empathizing with what that means, and then going to her and giving her the stuff she needs to deal with that problem (blanket, headphones, support, protection etc.). 
He has to LEARN that none of those poor people inherently know all this secret knowledge! They just care and ask each other stuff! You can ask Haruhi what she's afraid of and then help her with that! It was always this simple! Just because you’re not the same class as her and knowing her isn’t as easy as it is with people the same as you, doesn’t mean you’ll never know! Learn! Listen! Keep trying! 
Ouran shows their rich characters being hurt by their wealth. Their elitists mindset does NOT benefit them and they’re only narratively rewarded when they break out of it, THAT’S why the arcs are so good. 
(And also while we’re here, I LOVE when they do eps that show Tamaki’s character is actually a parallel of Haruhi’s. Tamaki grew up as an illegitimate child, hidden away in France with his mother. He knows what it is to not be at the top of the food chain, and he learns the skills to keep living! Tamaki is a survivor in a world run by a man who was ashamed of him and did not want him. That can destroy a child, but Tamaki doesn’t let it. He learns how to work people and he learns that belief in yourself is the most powerful asset someone can have. And this is the life experience he imparts onto Kyoya and this SAVES Kyoya, who was barreling towards a black pit of despair and chasing his father’s shadow. The ‘poor’ characters of this show have power that the rich people desperately desire, and in the end they learn that it’s not something you take it’s something you build for yourself.) 
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shadowandlightt · 5 months ago
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Snow and Flame | Cregan Stark X Velaryon!reader|
Sent to treat with Lord Stark, the young Targaryen prince and princess receive devastating news and must return to Dragonstone, only the princess is sure she'll see the young Lord once more.
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Cregan Stark, Warden of the North, wasn’t what you expected. He was warm, and kind, not stone cold and hardened by the cold of the north. You expected him to be hard, hadn’t expected the warm welcome that you received with your brother Jace. Your mother, the rightful queen, sent you here to treat with the young Lord of the North and remind him of the vow once made to her father, your grandsire. 
“Seven Hells,” You shiver, “Is it always this cold here?” “Yes, my princess,” Cregan laughs, “This is only summer snow though, it is much worse in the winter.”
You shiver once more, wishing for the warmth provided on Dragonstone, in the south. Yet you were glad to be here with your brother and the young Lord of the North. You were dressed in enough furs to outfit many in the south. But here they were needed.
 “I would hate to see winter snow then, my lord,” You sigh. 
“Winter snows aren’t so bad, Princess,” Cregan replies, “We find ways to stay warm.” 
“Enough, Lord Stark,” Jace chides, “Remember you are in the presence of a princess.” 
“Of course, forgive me, my Prince.” 
You glare at your brother, hating that he cut off the Lord. You were a lady of course, a Princess nonetheless. But you were not accustomed to hearing such things, given that you grew up with brothers. They forget that you are no delicate flower. 
You feel a heat in your belly at the way Cregan looks at you, desire rising up in you. You’d never felt this way before, never having been around men your own age since leaving King’s Landing as a child. 
“Perhaps you should show me those ways in which you stay warm,” You blurt out before being able to stop yourself. Though you quickly recover, “Forgive me My Lord, that was out of character for me. I blame the long journey.”
“Perhaps it would be best if you stayed here at Winterfell instead of making the journey to the Wall,” Jace warns. 
“No, I shan't stay behind,” You shake your head, “I was sent here to help secure the alliance between our two houses and I’ll do just that, Jace.”
He smiled, throwing his arms up in defeat. He did not dare say you sounded very much like your Queen, and Mother. You looked very much like her, only with dark hair instead of the trademark silver Targaryan locks. You looked like your father, you assumed, as well. Lord Strong. You hadn’t voiced your own suspicions, not even to your brothers. But you knew in your heart that Harwin Strong was your father, and that he loved you very much. 
“It’s an equally long journey to the Wall, are you sure you’re up for it Princess?” Cregan asks. 
“Yes, my Lord Stark, I believe I can handle a two week’s ride north.” 
You were readying to mount your horse when a young boy came running between your legs, latching onto you. A little laugh escaped your mouth as your arms came around the small boy to hold him. He couldn’t have been more than two or three, similar to the ages of your youngest brothers. 
“Who might we have here,” You laughed, picking up the small boy and holding him in your arms, “Don’t fret little one, we’ll come back.”
The little boy nuzzled into your neck, seeking warmth you surmised. Lord Stark couldn’t help but notice the way you beamed holding his young son, and the way he went to you instead of his own father. 
“Forgive me, Princess,” Cregan said, reaching for the boy, “Tis my son, from my late lady wife.” 
“No apology needed, Lord Stark,” You hum, holding tighter to the boy, “He reminds me of mine own brothers. Tis no trouble, really.” 
The little boy mumbled something into your neck, causing you to laugh aloud once more. Cregan finally pried the young boy from your arms, holding him just as close to his chest. 
“We’ll only be gone a few weeks, Little Rickon,” Cregan tells the little one, “When you’re older, you’ll come to The Wall too. Now, great your Prince and Princess, little lad.” 
“Oh, no need for that,” You say before Jace can get a word in, “He’s only little. There will be plenty of time for formalities as he grows.” 
Jace smiles at the young boy, poking his red little cheek to earn a smile from the wee little one. Cregan smiles down at his young son before putting him down and instructing him to go back to his maid, who was to look after him whilst Cregan was away. 
You weren’t sure how your dragon would deal with you being gone for so long, but you wouldn’t miss out on this. You’d always wanted to see the Wall. So you endured the long ride on horseback, which was almost enough to fell you. 
By the time you reached the Wall you were unsure if you could walk. Jace had to help you off your horse. You were thankful for the layers that added some padding and acted as a way to hide your limp. 
“I did warn you Princess,” Cregan sighs. 
“I’m fine,” I groan out, “Just haven’t been on my feet in some time.” 
He grins at you, but leads you and Jace towards the lift to the top of the Wall. You were warned that the men who take the Black are wild and vicious, but that you would be safe as long as you stayed with Lord Stark. They would not dare go against him. 
You vaguely listen as your brother and Lord Stark talk about politics during the ride north. You laughed along with them as Jacaerys made crude jokes. Something you were used to, but Cregan did not know of you and your brother’s humor. He’s a Northerner, something different from you. You were a fair southerner, not used to the chill and cold. He’s born and bred for it. 
“Too cold for you, Princess?” 
You like the way he says your title. A hint of mischief in his voice. You wanted to know what he would do if you were a low born girl, with no honor to protect. Would he take you? Make you his own? You yearn for him to take you. More than you expected. But you were a lady, a Princess at that. It wasn’t for you to want such things. Your marriage would be arranged for political gain, you were second in line for the throne, not the heir. Luke was heir to Driftmark, being the second son. You were nothing but a pawn, and you knew it. 
“Not at all, Lord Stark.” 
“Please, Cregan, if you will.” 
A blush rose to your cheeks, though you were lucky enough that the wind would hide it, cheeks already red enough. He held his hand out for you as you reached a platform. The sight took your breath away. The wide expanse beyond the wall was a sight to see, as was the wall that guards it. Your mouth is open slightly as the gasp leaves you. 
“Tis a sight, I know,” Cregan says, standing between you and Jace. 
“It’s beautiful.” 
You weren’t sure how the words left your lips, or if they were even given permission to leave. You were not mad about it though, words often had a way of escaping when it came to you. You often got in trouble for it. 
Jace and Cregan began negotiations once more whilst you took in the view of the wall. You heard Cregan promise some two thousand men, which made you smile even wider. The North would bend the knee to your mother, and serve their rightful queen. 
“A raven, My Lord, with urgent news from Dragonstone.” 
You turn, facing Cregan as he reads the missive, watching as his face falls, looking to Jace before handing him the message. Jace’s jaw tightens and his hands begin to shake. Your brows furrow, reaching beyond Cregan for Jace’s shoulder. 
“What is it?” You question, brows knitting together even tighter.
“We must return home,” His voice is tight, “Luke-he’s gone.” 
You felt as if the world was crashing around you. Surely there was a mistake, he was simply flying to Storm’s End. He was only meant to treat, and return. Luke knew how important this was to your mother’s claim, he wouldn’t have jeopardized it. He wouldn't have gotten himself killed over it. 
“Surely the raven is mistaken,” You scoff, taking a step back. Your back collides with Cregan’s chest, “Lucerys is fine, I’m sure.” 
Strong, somehow warm, hands grip your shoulders, holding you in place, “No, Aemond and Vhagar killed him.” 
“No. No I refuse to believe that,” Your head shakes, “Aemond disliked Luke after what happened, but he wouldn’t kill him. He couldn’t.” 
“Princess,” Cregan says softly, barely audible over the sound of the wind. 
“No!” You yell, feeling your chest cave in, “No!”
Tears freeze against your cheeks as you begin to cry. Without thinking, you turn around and bury yourself in Cregan’s chest. He stands still for a moment, stunned by your actions before wrapping his arms around you and holding you tightly. 
It only takes moments for you to compose yourself. You were two weeks away from your dragon, a week and a half at best. Days away from Dragonstone and your mother. All you could think of was how scared little Luke had to have been. He was all alone, high in the clouds, no doubt in the middle of a fierce storm. You should have opted to go with him instead of Jace. Jace could have handled this without you. 
“We should go back,” Jace instructs. 
You sniff and nod, backing away from the Warden of the North. You instantly miss his warmth, internally scolding yourself for thinking such a thing at a time like this. You instead lean into Jace, accepting your brother as your rock until you could return home. 
When you say goodbye to Cregan several days later, you can’t help but hope this isn’t the last time you see him. He promises his men once more, and watches as you and your brother climb onto your dragons. 
The flight home is wildly fast, pushing your dragons to carry you faster than you thought they could. As if they could sense how quickly you wished to return home to Dragonstone, they allowed you to push.
By the time you return, even you are out of breath, emotions swirl wildly in your chest. You want nothing more than to go straight to your mother, but Jace tells you that he’ll give the report, seeing you were in no shape to do so. 
You retreated to your rooms, saying nothing to Baela as you passed her. All there was, was your misery over the loss of your brother. You screamed and cried his name, mourning in the only way you knew how. You wanted to go to war, slay the devil Aemond and Vhagar. But you knew in your heart it would be a fool’s errand. You would be the one who was slain. Vhagar was much too big for any of the dragons with riders here on Dragonstone. Vermithor was the only one who could potentially stand against her, yet the Bronze Fury was riderless still. 
You wail even when Jace finds you once more, holding you tightly in his arms. You both cry for your little brother, who was so full of life and love. He did not deserve to die, and you find yourself praying to the gods to take you instead. You fall asleep in your older brother’s arms, having cried everything you had to cry. 
You expect to see Luke when you finally close your eyes. To dream of his horrific final moments. But instead you dream of white snow, an ice wall, and the stoic northerner who threatened to consume you. When you woke, tears still shining in your eyes, you vowed that it would not be the last time you saw Lord Cregan Stark. You would see him again, and find if he thinks about you as much as you seem to be thinking of him.
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matsunoluvr · 4 months ago
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୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ how you tamed monster!sylus…
warnings: descriptions of some violence, blood, injuries, rushed ending (lol)
character: sylus
link to master list here!!
author’s notes: i saw some theories that sylus is actually inhuman and i’d fucking love if in a past life MC resonated and ‘tamed’ him which is why he’s particularly fond of her, like i’m such a sucker for ‘inhuman’ things gaining humanity through love
my requests are open since i’m running low on ideas hehe :3
more under the cut!
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monster!sylus was indifferent to everything at first, if you got hurt you got hurt. why would he feel anything?
he’d hurt many things before, killed many things before. such trivial matters did not bother him.
that was until, somehow he managed to get hurt.
watching you, a human, far more fragile than he could ever be panic over his wound was confusing for him.
the way you frantically dug in your bag to wrap his arm in gauze - his blood seeping into the pale cloth as he watches you, intrigued.
he could stop the bleeding at any moment, any time, but he doesn’t. instead, he opted to watch you flailing over his injury with a neutral expression.
only when he noticed his human form growing a little pale did he decide to stop blood flow to the wound, choosing to inspect the bandage you put on him carefully.
“What use is this?”
picking at the uncomfortable material, you scold him and tell him to ‘keep it on until it heals’ - monster!sylus decides not to tell you he already healed the site as soon as you finished fussing over him
the next time he got hurt, he decided not to heal himself and instead present his injury to you.
holding up his finger which was (basically) broken in half, he looked at you expectantly.
if you weren’t so utterly dumbfounded at the nonchalant manner in which he presented you with a severely mangled appendage you might’ve made a comparison to him and a cat looking at its owner after bringing them a dead rat
monster!sylus who proceeded to watch you freak out a little, fix him up then scold him (again) for being so reckless.
he was interested at the care you took to make it as painless as possible (it was safe to say you were terrible at it, he was trying not to wince the whole time. yeah he was a monster, but why are human bodies really fucking fragile and sensitive?), eyes flitting between your hands and your face
this was probably the first instances of sylus receiving care, being cared about, and holy shit he didn’t know what to do
monster!sylus that would inwardly sigh every time you’d ask him ridiculous questions such as “have you eaten today?” or “do you think the sunset today is pretty?”
half the time he would scoff or shrug it off, the other half he would respond
when he responded he noticed the excited buzz in your voice as you’d give your own opinion on it - something that he grew to care about
“What do you think of this flower, isn’t it pretty Sylus?”
“It is?”
“It is! At least to me- [insert you talking about your favourite flower].”
*Sylus watching you with intent, beginning of a smile forming at the corners of his mouth.*
monster!sylus who, at one point, sat under a tree with you, looking over the N109 zone towards linkon when his deep voice split through the silence
“Do you like me?”
the sudden and blunt question probably shocked you - your flustered response causing him to grow confused
what was wrong with the question?
was the point of asking not to find out answers one wants to know?
he would simply sit and stare at you until you responded, no matter how long it took you he waited
monster!sylus who finally realised what it felt like to be cared for when you answered ‘yes’, the warm sensation flooding his senses, and he was utterly confused.
it wasn’t as if you’d devoted yourself to him, nor had you sworn your loyalty for life - but the idea that you liked him…
he gave you no response, looking off into the distance as he tried to process the information.
when you asked him ‘Aren’t you going to respond?’ he’s give some bullshit answer along the lines of “You haven’t asked me anything.”
he knows what you were asking.
for some reason, he can’t say anything back.
monster!sylus that slowly began to seek your presence, your company. waiting for you to show up became tiresome, he wanted to be with you.
showing up out of no where - when you were on a walk or entering your residency, he would all of a sudden appear and demand your attention (which you secretly didn’t mind giving).
each visit he’d stay longer, get a little closer, feel a little more.
you taught him how to laugh - well at least give an amused huff, how to do his hair ‘properly’ rather than having it sit erratically on his head.
moving his hair out of his eyes, you swoop it into a neat parting muttering something about not hiding his ‘pretty eyes’, arching over his lids and settling neatly.
however after looking in the mirror, he immediately ran his hand through the hair causing you to almost murder the man on the spot
you taught him how to appreciate cuisines, especially the different variants of drinks.
“This is what brand of wine? Ah… I see.”
you taught him how to treat wounds, how to cook simple foods, each visit a little date on its own.
monster!sylus who inevitably grew fond of you, watching you with a small smile no matter what you did.
if you ever pointed this out, he’d just shrug his shoulders and carry on with whatever he was doing before.
he didn’t notice at first, but you’d somehow managed to work yourself into his life - despite having tried to rid you many times before.
now, your company was second nature. for a solitary creature, he had never before had the chance to appreciate companionship.
you taught him how to.
monster!sylus who quickly learnt your interests. you loved the small, infant cats that would roam the streets - every time you’d stop at a shop, buy some food and nudge it towards the creatures.
you’d take him to ride on a horse - which he complained about being ‘too slow’ and that he could run several paces faster, so you introduced him to motorcycles.
sitting behind you, arms wrapping around your waist as you both sailed through the night air, the city lights your stars.
monster!sylus who you sat next to, head resting against his shoulder.
“Relaxing so easily against me, have you forgotten what I truly am?”
if you’re confused, he’ll spell it out for you. he’s grown used to your obliviousness after all.
a monster
a being birthed by abhorrence, the dirt and filth that humans try so desperately to conceal. no amount of flesh, skin and bone could hide that fact, no amount of blood that spills against his hands could cloak such a stench.
cruel, disgusting, selfish. malevolence was second nature.
sylus who learnt what it felt like to be unconditionally loved in your gentle embrace.
eyes widening with surprise, he’ll ask you if you’re scared of him, you say never. you say that you could never be disgusted by him.
you tell him with so much conviction it may as well have been indoctrinated in the stars.
he couldn’t help but smile at your innocence, your ability to love the unlovable.
sylus who learnt how to feel fear as he watched the wanderer pierce your body - blood spurting from your chest.
his hands are covered in blood - palms slipping against your chest as he tries to plug the hole in your chest.
the warmth of your body, your soul, gushes from you in violent pulses - sylus can feel your trembling breaths, his eyes wide with panic. he fumbles around, cursing louder and louder as he watches you fade away.
“Fuck- fuck. Hold on, keep your eyes open - I can do something about this just wait.”
sylus who watches in despair as the life drains from your eyes, feeling the sharp throb in his eye propel his evol at the wanderer that murdered you
monster!sylus who rips the wanderer’s limb by limb, ensuring that the subject experienced each and every sensation as its soul parted from the mangled corpse
no mercy was shown as he suffocated the creature to death, crushing it’s neck as it squealed.
monster!sylus who stood over a corpse. the corpse of the person who taught him love.
monster!sylus who didn’t attend your funeral.
you never taught him how to grieve, never taught him what to do when you’d leave him - damned with immortality.
monster!sylus who never got to say the words he wanted to.
he could only see you where you lay, sitting helplessly by your tombstone.
it feels as though he’s been stabbed, a burning wound ripping down his throat. he knows the answer now.
“I love you too.”
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AN: not proofread as usual i had fun writing the beginning but i had no idea how to finish it - i feel like sylus and MC had a tragic end which is why he’s so forward with his love for them now that he knows he loves them and that their time together can end any moment, unlike their previous life this life he’ll make sure MC knows he’s theirs! :3
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peachsayshi · 6 months ago
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₊ ⊹ . ݁ MILLION DOLLAR BABY  ₊ ⊹ .
(sex worker!suguru geto x rich girl!reader)
⊹ tags: suguru geto x female reader; nanami kento x satoru; sukuna is reader's ex; character mentions: yuki, mei mei, shoko, toji; alludes to dd/lg relationship (very very mildly) with sukuna; a mix of angst/smut/fluff; domestic; non curse au; reader was in a toxic relationship; reader has daddy issues a bit lol; mentions of troubled past; mentions of death (parental)
:about: you grew up in a supremely wealthy household, but that came with a price. you’ve never had control over your own life, and now your father is set to marry you off. luckily, there's someone else who captures your heart. what does it matter that you pay him for his company?
:note: hi, everyone! this story is finally here, and it's one that's taken me forever to work but I actually loved this piece. I haven't been excited about something I've written in a while. I hope it lives up to all your expectations. comments and reblogs are always appreciated <3 - this fic is one shot, and I am willing to explore stories with the side characters. I'll happily answer any lore questions regarding sex worker geto x rich girl reader, but there will not be a part two or more parts of their story. It is a standalone.
wc: 14K+
The ceiling is covered with hanging irises, each one carefully handcrafted in paper. Edison bulbs dip down from between in staggering heights, illuminating the bar around you in warm light. It’s crowded tonight, clinking glasses and roaring laugher bouncing off the walls and clashing against the bass coming through the speakers. You scan the crowd, anticipation making your stomach flutter, but it quickly eases when you spot a head of golden hair among the audience. 
Nanami is at the bar, looking dapper as usual in a chocolate brown suit offset by a cream colored shirt. He’s drinking a whiskey when you approach him, the amber liquid mirroring the touch of bronze on his cheekbones. You sling your designer purse off your shoulder (the latest splurge of the week) and slide into the seat right next to him. 
“And how was your vacation?” you ask, greeting him with a question and noticing his mouth draw into a firm line. 
“Let’s not talk about it,” he insists, his eyes a little sad which only makes your stomach ache at the sight. 
He’s your closest friend - the only real friend you have. Kento Nanami doesn’t carry two faces. He sticks to the one that he has.  As one of the top investors in the country, he made a name by keeping the rich wealthy. He loathes his job and the pressures surrounding it - a walking hypocrite for despising the life that lines his pockets. 
He can’t find an escape no matter how hard he tries. 
And that's why you’re both two peas in a pod. 
He does, however, like you - not because of your background, but because you don’t try to be something that you are not as well. In a world where you are surrounded by parasites, Kento proved to be a nearly extinct butterfly, quietly fluttering by your side as you both drift across the harsh jungle around you. 
You concede, knowing better than to push his buttons. “Okay, I guess we aren’t talking about it…” 
“Tell me something else. Do you ever know how to walk into the room and not be the center of attention?” 
You smirk as he calls the waiter over.  Your presence easing the twinge of disdain on his face.
“What are you trying to say, hmm?” 
“You look nice tonight. New dress?” 
“New dress, new bag, new nails...” you list off, showing off each expensive purchase as you check them off your list. 
Nanami shakes his head playfully before ordering your usual once the bartender approaches. He angles his body towards you and breathes out a heavy sigh. 
“How are you?” He asks, genuine concern masking his face. 
Your shoulders drop. “I don’t want to talk about it…” 
His expression softens, one hand moving to touch your thigh exposed by the slit of your dress. 
“When do you meet Naoya?” 
He’s the only other person who knows about the pending engagement. The only person who offered you a way out by proposing instead. Despite his stance within the social community, you know that it’s not an offer that you can easily accept. 
Kento wasn’t bred into this world, and that makes all the difference. 
Your father would never accept a man from such a humble background. Especially not one whose offer wouldn't benefit him by any means.
“A few weeks from now,” you reply, eyes shifting to the bartender who passes your drink towards you. “He’s given my father specifications on how I should be presented…” 
Your friend scoffs and rolls his eyes. “Pardon my vulgarity but he just sounds like the kind of guy who wants to swing his dick around. I’m surprised he hasn’t shown up tonight…” 
The opening of the Ayame Lounge & Bar was invite only, exclusive to socialites and the elite. You know that Naoya must have received an invitation, everyone from the Zen’in family was here in attendance including the infamous outcast Toji. 
“He wouldn’t be caught dead here,” you inform, picking up your beverage and taking a small sip. “Naoya likes to uphold “tradition” but we all know it’s just a facade.” 
Kento’s thumb strokes your skin tenderly, worry ingrained in his gentle eyes. 
The two of you spend the night talking, catching up on the little things since his return from a two week vacation in Malaysia. He keeps the conversation light, telling you about his fantastic accommodation and all the food that he ate while he was away. In between you find yourself glancing over his shoulder, your eye on the crowd taking in the people around you. 
That’s when you spot him, standing just a few feet away, looking like a demigod among mere aristocrats. His hair is pulled back into a neat bun, a layer of his bangs kissing his forehead. His face is serious, jaw tight and eyes sharp as he focuses on his white haired counterpart. The black tee hugs his torso, his neat slacks cinched by the waist with a leather belt. You can’t help but bite your bottom lip, your mind drifting away from the conversation at hand. 
Your friend notices, of course. Kento is so tuned in to everything around him that he almost can’t help himself. He glances over his shoulder to see what caught your attention, only to instantly turn back around and stare at the whiskey glass on the table. 
The tips of his ears burn red. 
You register the response, knowing exactly what struck him to react in that way. 
Satoru Gojo -  former porn star, turned model, turned mega influencer. With a follower count in the hundreds of millions, he is the world’s hottest it boy. Nobody can deny his sheer beauty - whenever he walks into a room, he manages to steal a glance from every single person within his vicinity. Due to a rare genetic condition, his sapphire blue eyes and frosty white hair earned him the title of “The Prince”, and the people were desperate to share a place by his side. 
Suguru and Satoru were also the best of friends, a fact that Suguru revealed to you one night in bed. The two of them met on set, back when Satoru was still doing adult films. At the time, Suguru was just a camera man and it was Satoru who told him he could increase his earnings if he just performed instead. 
You remember telling Suguru: “it’s crazy how quickly his life changed”
“Some people are just lucky,” he responded, though you easily picked up the bitterness laced in his words. 
What most people don’t know is that Satoru Gojo is also involved with the man seated right next to you. You stumbled upon Nanami’s secret affair by accident when the two of you attended a resort opening by hotel heiress, Yuki Tsukumo. Everyone was invited to stay overnight for the weekend, and the morning after your first night there, you walked over towards Nanami’s room to grab some breakfast. He greeted you in a grey robe with his hair tousled, with hickeys trailing the side of his neck. You quirked a brow in his direction, your mouth forming into a blatant circle when you found Satoru Gojo fast asleep on his bed right behind him. 
The man in question looks away from Suguru towards you and Kento. His brows lifting in surprise when he spots your golden haired friend, but your eyes rest on Suguru who gestures that he will catch Satoru around. 
They both walk in opposite directions. 
You take a sip of your drink, your eyes shifting to Nanami. 
“You’ve got about five seconds to figure out what you want to say because Satoru is walking over here as we speak,” you inform. 
He exhales and straightens his back, his guard entirely up. 
You smile at Satoru when he approaches you, his pearly whites radiant as always. 
“Hi!” He says casually, though you can hear a touch of apprehension in his voice. “Mind if I cut in?” 
“Not at all!” you respond, “Can I get you a refill?” 
His cheeks blush a subtle shade of pink, the tiny gesture making you understand how easily it is to fawn over such a beautiful face. “It’s just soda, but sure” 
“Not drinking tonight?” You continue, glancing between him and Nanami as you wait for your friend to interject. 
“Actually, I’m three years sober,” he explains. 
“Good for you!” You cheer honestly, before turning to the bartender and ordering him another soda. 
From your peripheral vision you see him inch closer towards your friend. 
“I haven’t heard from you in a while,” he states, though his voice comes across as a little small. 
“I’ve been busy,” Nanami curtly replies, and your brows furrow at his unusual tone. 
“Too busy to even say hi?” Satoru continues, his voice low enough that only the three of you can hear each other. 
“Aren’t you here with a date?” Nanami chides, glancing up at him with a mocking eye. 
“Utahime isn’t my date, we both got invited together by our agency…” Satoru answers through gritted teeth. “Besides, I was hoping to spend time with you. I haven’t heard from you since Kuantan…” 
Nanami’s face burns an even brighter shade of crimson, the intimacy of Satoru’s comment flaring his humiliation. 
“Come on,” the white haired prince teases, attempting to ease the discomfort. “Don’t be such a grump. Let’s go outside. Get a little fresh air.” 
You can see that people are starting to stare at the three of you. 
Wherever Satoru goes, eyes follow him. 
While he may be immune to the attention, you can clearly see that Nanami is not. 
“No, thank you.” 
“What? You going to make me beg?” Satoru presses cheekily, but there is a twinge of desperation in his voice. 
“Begging is not difficult for somebody like you,” Nanami bites, and you can’t help but glare at him in shock. 
“Kento!” you chastise, but the look on his face speaks volumes. 
Regret. 
Instantaneous Regret. 
In front of him is a visible hurt that breaks Satoru’s face, like paint slowly chipping away. His eyes gloss over, and he anxiously rubs his hand over the back of his undercut before excusing himself and turning on his heel. 
Nanami covers his face with his palm, while you can only stare at him in disbelief. 
“How can you say that to him? I thought you liked him!” You whisper. 
“I-I didn’t mean to-” 
“You act like you’re ashamed of him whenever he’s around you…” 
Nanami avoids your eye, “How do you think this makes me look? I can’t have people seeing us together. I don’t want the world to swallow me up just because he prefers being gawked at by everyone around him” 
“That’s his job - it’s how he earns a living. I can’t believe you would degrade him over it,” you shake your head, unaware of where your sudden defenses are coming from.
“I know that…” 
“Is that why you don’t want to talk about your trip? Did something happen?” 
The man grows quiet, a sigh escaping him. 
“I broke up with him” 
“You what?” You gasp. 
“It'll never work. Our lives are too different” 
“You didn’t even give him a chance, Ken. He likes you. He really, really likes you.” 
“What chance is there to give? My life would come apart because of him. He would never be truly mine. I would have to share him with the rest of the world day in and day out. And the worst part is that…what should be intimate between us will never be ours either. Do you know that he’s still the highest streamed porn star in the world-” 
“He’s just a person. A person like me and you. Neither one of us chose this life. I didn’t ask to be born into my family, and you weren’t asked to save yours from debt. Yet, here we are. Existing in a world that we had to carve out for ourselves. Don’t you think the same applies to him?” 
You take another sip of your drink, your cheeks warming with anger at your friend’s condescending tone towards Satoru. 
Although, you find your reasons for defending him to be far more self serving. 
“So what if he sells his body? That’s his choice to make. Does it change anything else about him? Does it change his feelings for you?” You lecture, “I can’t believe that you be this ungrateful over skewed morals. If you both care about each other, there is no reason why you can’t be together. Take it from somebody who’ll probably never get the chance. This isn’t something you want to simply let go of, Kento. You’ll regret this decision for the rest of your life.”
。゚•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• 。゚
Nanami downs his whiskey and excuses himself then, your words stinging the microscopic cuts on his heart. You find yourself a little flustered after watching him walk away, unsure of where that outburst even came from. 
The eyes surrounding you look away. 
You know you’ve given everyone within your peripheral area a story to gossip about. One that would be twisted and chewed until there is no morsel of truth left in it. 
Your drink gives you enough liquid courage to socialize and face the music instead. 
You steer your way through the crowd hoping to find one person in particular, but instead you are caught among the net of cliques, old faces, and fake friends. You manage to bypass any pointed questions, passing through each conversation with a forced grin and entertaining the discussions at hand with fluffy anecdotes and petty rumours. 
When you walk away, you know full well that there will be whispers behind your back.
That’s the give and take about this world. Everyone is a vulture secretly waiting to witness the rise and fall of those around them. It’s a vicious circle, which is why nobody ever reveals their true hand in the process.  
You glance around the room, honing in on the handsome dark haired boy you’ve grown entirely too attached too except you spot someone else in between who makes your spine seize.
Your toes curl in your pointed heels. 
Your heart stutters unsteadily. 
Blushed strands, a wolfish grin, and a broad build - Sukuna always takes up far more room than he needs. 
You personally believe it’s because his ego is so massive it requires that extra space. 
You haven’t seen the man in five years, not after the messy relationship that that followed your even messier break up. 
You should have known better than to get involved with him while still so young. 
You remember that version of you. When you first met Sukuna, you were a small rabbit who had accidentally hopped its way into a lone wolf’s den. Twenty one and just embracing the glitz and glamor of the world around you. The man was charming, flirtatious and most of all dangerous. You couldn’t help but return to his lair, especially when he would take the time and effort to approach you at every function, party and gathering that you attended. When you think about your relationship with Sukuna, it fills you with shame until you can only drown in it. There is a reason why you’ve kept it a secret for so long. Even staring at him right now, the dishonor hangs on your shoulder like a weighted sin that you’re burdened to carry for the rest of your life. Every time it hits, the memories play like a movie on hyper speed. 
How often you allowed him to spill his seed all over your body. How often he brought you to tears with his tongue between your legs. How often you would moan the words “daddy” over and over again while riding him. How often you let him manipulate your heart. How often you let him convince you that you were happy.  
That twisted relationship was testament to how broken you were. 
You didn’t even know about his wife who lived in Kyoto until it was far too late. 
Your instinct tells you to turn on your heel and walk in the other direction, but you catch Suguru just up ahead in the crowd and your courage outweighs your hesitation. 
You manage to stride past Sukuna,  a darting feline scurrying towards the safety of a shadow. Your hammering heart steadies itself when the trail of his strong cologne is a safe distance behind you. You nervously clutch onto the strap of your purse, exhaling a quick breath before marching up to Suguru. 
You tap his shoulder twice. 
He spins around, eyes lifting as a smile spreads across his handsome face. 
Like a full moon on a clear night sky. 
“Well, isn’t this a lovely surprise.” 
“I sure hope so,” you remark, biting your bottom lip playfully as you glance at your own feet. 
Suguru chuckles, taking a step closer. “It is.” 
You glance up at him from underneath your lashes, your heart vibrating with pure excitement. You think it’s silly to have such a schoolgirl infatuation over him, especially since you understood the terms that surrounding your relationship. 
You pay him for his company. 
You aren’t supposed to have a crush on man who you employ to have to sex with you. 
Yet, your gut tells you otherwise. Convinces you that the softness in which he speaks is reserved only for you. 
“Are you here with anyone?” You ask a little breathlessly, hoping that you weren’t interrupting him working. 
Suguru shakes his head. 
“Satoru invited me,” he clarifies, and it’s an answer that only makes you giddy. 
“Oh!” You squeak, “well that’s nice. It’s a really exclusive party, make sure you to take it in…” 
His eyes blatantly fall over you, cascading down your body like ink dripping over a canvas. 
Your cheeks warm. 
He’s not even hiding that he’s checking you out, and it triggers the wild desire within you. 
“Are you here alone?” He questions. 
You nod your head, knowing full well that Kento is probably in the midst of a heated conversation with his distraught lover and won’t be returning anytime soon. 
“Why don’t you join us then?” He adds, cocking his head to point at the table behind him. 
You glance over his shoulder, barely recognizing the crowd. 
A fact that seems ideal to you. 
“I’d love to,” you say with a pretty smile, all the while Suguru’s eyes continue sparkling. 
。゚•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• 。゚
The last time you saw Suguru was a few weeks ago, where your heavy heart spilled the news of your pending engagement. 
“An arranged marriage, huh?” he whispered in the dark, his sharp eyes dipping to your naked chest while his delicate fingers carefully pushed the bedsheet further down to your hips.
You inched a little closer into his frame, soaking in the outlines of his chiseled torso and bringing one finger to trace little shapes on his broad shoulder.
Your brows furrowed with annoyance, “yeah, ever heard of the Zen’in family?”
Suguru scoffed, breaking character for only a second but it’s something that you’ve caught him doing more recently. He doesn’t hold his reactions around you as tightly as he used to. The front of this alter ego that he created faltering, which is probably why you find yourself drawn to the person existing underneath the mask of the seducer.
You sigh before continuing your explanation, “my father thinks Naoya Zen’in is a perfect match for me.”
An uneasy expression flickered across Suguru’s face, but he suppresses it before allowing it to linger. 
You lifted yourself up onto your elbow and rest your cheek on your palm. “What is it?”
Suguru mirrors your position, his large hand gliding back and forth over the slope of your hips and waistline which sent goosebumps all over your body. “I’ve heard that Naoya…” Suguru stated, pinching the pads of his fingers lightly against your flesh before leaning forward to kiss the crease between your brows, “can be a handful to deal with…”
You thread your fingers around his neck, your lips finding his jaw where you return a kiss. “And who told you that?” you murmured as the weight of Suguru’s body rolls on top of yours.
You were staring at his devastatingly handsome face from below. The longer you spent time with him the more you began to wonder about his circumstances and a reoccurring thought crossed your mind once more.
Suguru could truly be anything he wanted, but instead he was here making a killing off of fucking lonely women and porn videos.
You don’t judge his choices, but you couldn't help but feel puzzled by the situation especially when you knew the trajectory of his best friend’s career path. 
One photo shoot at a mid-level fashion brand skyrocketed Satoru Gojo’s career and made him a household name. Yet, Suguru Geto was a taboo that was whispered behind closed doors. 
“I have a client who likes to gossip,” he admitted. 
That’s all you got because Suguru kept everything else about his clients confidential. You shivered when his mouth met your neck, his lips sucking along the tender skin that sent goosebumps all over your chest, but there’s an ache in your heart when you consider that if it wasn’t for the signed cheque in your purse, he wouldn’t even be here in the first place.
Not a single man you’ve met in the world compared to Suguru. You’ve never known how sweet lovemaking can be until he fucked you for the time. Not only was he beautiful beyond comprehension, but he was charming and extremely smart. You found yourself enjoying his company beyond physical purposes, and conversations with him turned out to be one of your favorite ways to pass time.
“Think we’ll still get together when you’re a missus?” he teased, his lips trailing lower to your collar bones and hovering just a above your breasts.
The thought of you getting married only made you sick.
“Do you peg me as a terrible wife? a woman who would happily cheat on her husband?” you questioned, your voice trembling when Suguru circled his lips around your hard nipple.
He hummed, drawing out a whimper when he nipped at the bud lightly, his tongue gliding over the hardened nub. 
“No,” he answered, his voice dropping an octave and your mind swirled when you contemplate if that strange tone is actually jealousy. He rested his chin on your chest, his inky hair framing his face in a waterfall of obsidian. “I do, however, peg Naoya as a terrible husband.”
You sank your fingers into his locks, “it doesn’t matter who my father chooses. All these men are the same. Naoya is no worse than the rest. I’m trapped regardless…”
It was the first time you allowed yourself to think about Sukuna when in bed with Suguru. The first time you thought about the last four years and the many men who tried to weasel their way into your heart just for the sake of obtaining status. The discomfort is written plainly on your face. Suguru doesn’t know that seeking him out was your way of taking matters into your own hands, even in just the smallest way. 
“I’m sorry, sweetheart,” he responded sincerely, the kindness in his voice the reason why your eyes prick with tears.
You sniffled, using your free hand to wipe away a rogue droplet that freely falls down your cheek. Suguru adjusted his position so he was lying by your side. He didn't say anything but draws you into his chest for a hug, enveloping you in his warmth. You tried hard not to consider the reality of the situation, and accept the gesture freely as you cuddle him.
But the moment of peace is interrupted by a loud vibration. You and Suguru both perked up to stare at his phone buzzing on the side table.
Your heart sank.
Another client.
Suguru reached his arm around to grab the phone, and you closed your eyes to inhale his natural scent, trying to soak him in for as long as you can before he leaves you like he’s done many times before.
To your surprise he simply switched it off, before proceeding to wrap his arm back around you to return to his position.
“You sure you don’t need to take that?” you mumbled, trying to play off your disappointment as casually as possible.
“I’m booked out for the rest of the evening,” he answered nonchalantly, “there’s no reason to respond.”
A tickle in your belly sent sparks all over your skin. “but your cheque only covers the hours we agreed on…”
Two fingers touched the underside of your chin, and Suguru tilted your head up so you were both face to face again. “Don’t worry about it,” he consoled, his thumb lightly outlining your bottom lip, “this is on the house.”
What bliss it was to fall asleep in his arms that night. You recall waking up right before dawn to find him in deep slumber, his strong arm draped protectively across your body with the heat cocooning you from the rest of the world. 
Disappointment shattered you the next morning, when you were greeted by the sun and an empty bed.
You’re not sure when Suguru had snuck out, but you were puzzled to find that your cheque was still tucked away safely in your purse. 
It was the first time he walked away without any payment. 
You still vividly remember his reaction when he met you just a little over a year ago. 
“You’re young,” he blurted, his eyes widening with confusion. 
“We’re around the same age,” you replied defensively, already feeling insecure for having hired him after spending weeks watching his videos. You didn’t even know about his house calls until you heard it from a source within your social circle. "Is this how you greet all your clients?”
Suguru raised his brow in contemplation, “my other clients don’t look like you…”
Over time you learned that he catered to a specific demographic: older divorcees and cheating housewives.
The person you might turn into years from now if this marriage goes through.
。゚•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• 。゚
After that night you told yourself that you would schedule another meeting with Suguru to compensate him for his last session.
Right now, all you can think about is your heart hammering when Suguru subtly interlaces his fingers with your own, and leads you through the crowd until you both find a safe spot on the corner of the lounge chair. His group is far too engrossed in their own conversations to notice you both, drunk on the buzzing night and enjoying the many amenities of this exclusive party. 
“You look nice,” you compliment, catching Suguru’s attention while trying to ignoring his knees bumping against yours.
“As do you,” he replies, his voice smoother than velvet. “But you don’t need me to tell you that you’re gorgeous.” 
Oh but I do, you think, masking your excitement with a giggle and casual roll of your eyes. I could hear you tell me that forever. 
Suguru shyly looks down at his lap, hiding his own smile. 
It’s strange, you think, how the two of you are talking. Like this man hasn’t been inside you multiple times and made you cum until you can’t think straight. Like he doesn’t know your body in the most intimate sense.
Like you don’t fund a decent chunk of his salary. 
“Are you enjoying the party?” 
Suguru shrugs, “It’s not too bad. Though, I’m not one for big crowds if I am being completely honest...” 
“Makes sense. I don’ get a kick out of it as much as I used to.”
Suguru angles his body to face you, giving you his full attention. “Why’s that?” 
You sigh, your hands suddenly feeling empty without a drink. You sling your purse off your shoulder and place it between you both, before proceeding to fiddle with the fabric of your dress instead. 
You can lie, but you don’t know how. 
Well, you don’t know how to lie with him. 
Something about starting this contract with Suguru unveiled a level of vulnerability in you that you can’t seem to hide. The first night you both spent together you were a nervous wreck, stumbling and bumbling over words trying to find excuse after excuse as to why a woman of your age would even hire him. By your third appointment, you asked if he could be slow and gentle with you, the emotional scars of your previous relationship a stinging wound. You were desperate for tenderness, and Suguru obliged with your request. By the end you found yourself reaching your climax with tears in your eyes. 
If you were to list out more moments like this, you would simply go on and on. 
You can’t hide your truth with Suguru when it was the first thing you’ve ever shown him. 
“Because it’s a constant reminder that I can be in a room full of people I know and still feel incredibly alone…” you mumble, your gaze catching his. 
His hand finds your thighs, the warmth of his large palm burning through the fabric of your dress. 
“You’re not alone tonight, sweetheart,” he reassures. 
“You don’t have to be so nice…” you insist, suddenly self conscious over his flattery. The same sweetness he bestows upon you when you’re both locked away in a hotel room somewhere, but you didn’t sign off on any bonus transactions tonight. 
He squeezes your thigh and tilts his head. “But I like being nice to you” 
He says it so matter of factly it almost makes you faint. 
Your brows upturn with confusion. “Why?” 
His touch expands upward, grazing over the curve of your thigh, bunching the material of your dress between his fingers. He leans closer, the scent of bergamot wafting up your nose and kissing your neck. 
“Look there,” he states, and you follow the line of his gaze. 
“That woman has been married for fifteen years and her husband never got her off once. And that woman…” he continues, shifting his eyes from body to body, “has a birth mark just above her hip bone. And at the table right behind us,” 
When you turn your face you accidentally bump into the tip of his nose. 
“...are two sisters who pretend they get along well but are currently in a massive fight over their inheritance” 
Your stomach coils with jealousy. “Acquaintances of yours?” 
 Suguru leans back slightly, giving you both room to breathe. 
“Yes, clients…” he confirms, “there’s a few of them here tonight, but you’re the only one who acknowledges me. I’m just a dirty little secret to the rest.” 
Your envy dwindles into sympathy, and you can’t help but let the question slip. 
“How does that make you feel?” 
There’s a twitch in Suguru’s jaw, a hint of scarred pride. You know he has plenty of it, he just hides it well.
The man shrugs, averting his sharp gaze as he downs the rest of his drink. “It is what it is” 
Oh, but that response doesn’t nothing to help your heart, the muscle practically screaming at your brain to do so something and make him feel better. 
Mindlessly, you loop both arms around his bicep, casually resting your chin on his shoulder. 
“I’m sorry if I ever made you feel that way...” 
You’re not sure why you’re apologizing, but you’re hoping it’ll mean something to him. He turns to face you, and if he inched a little closer he could probably kiss you. 
“You are an enigma to me” 
“In what way?” 
He brushes his lips past your own, making you catch your breath for a moment. His mouth trails its way up to your ear, and he whispers a sentence that sends goosebumps running all over your body. 
“In the way that how a woman like you can fit in a life like this” 
。゚•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• 。゚
The night carries on, the pulse of hedonism sending reverberations across the establishment. The crowd grows larger, the air a potion of liquor, expensive cologne, sweat and pleasure. The lights dim, inducing everyone into the trance of the ambience set around them, allowing them to indulge and consume. Your conversation with Suguru feels like minutes, but two whole hours pass with the both you concealed from the crowd. You’re almost mesmerized by him when he talks, cast under an entirely different spell that seems to effect nobody else. His touches turn more intimate the longer you speak, with Suguru securing his arm around your waist and leaning back against the chair as he keeps you tucked into his frame. 
That’s another thing you started noticing - how this man likes to hold you. 
He even did it when you were in bed together last. 
And the time before that. 
And the time before that. 
And the time before that-
If you weren’t surrounded by so many eyes you would simply curl into him, but you find yourself restraining while thinking of what excuse might work to get you both out of here because you just want to be alone with him. 
“Can I get you a drink?” Suguru offers, a wave of disappointment rolling into you as he untangles himself slowly. 
“Just some water...” 
Suguru kisses the inside of your wrist with the reassurance that he’ll be right back, but the public display only makes your cheeks bloom with endearment. 
“Got it” 
When he stands up and walks away is when you notice how the crowd around you has dispersed. Most of Suguru’s party were gone - standing either by the bar or caught in the middle of the dance floor. You can see that there were a few shifty eyes staring at you, and a lump forms in your throat when you realize that by allowing yourself to melt into Suguru it meant that you revealed your weakness to the rest of the wild. 
You take a second to readjust - fixing the hem of your dress before pulling out your pocket mirror and reapplying your lipstick. You fight off any anxious thoughts, sticking a big metaphorical middle finger to whoever was watching you with any hint of judgement. 
Your care for Suguru outweighed their own by tons. 
You just didn’t know how far you had let your guard down until a strange shadow veils over you. 
“Red still looks good on you.” 
Your heart doesn’t sink, it seizes, collapses into itself when you drop the mirror in your hand. His dark chuckle makes your spine tingle with unease. Sukuna kneels to pick up your mirror, his devilish smiling greeting you as you swallow the lump in your throat. 
“What? Cat got your tongue?” He teases, huffing out another laugh when you snatch the pocket mirror from his hand and quickly throw your things back into your purse. 
“I have to go.” 
You bolt onto your feet, only to pause when his contact scorches your forearm. 
“What’s the rush? I’m just saying hi.” 
You shrug him off aggressively, eyes violent and full of fury. 
“I don’t want to say hi to you. As a matter of fact, I hope that we never have to speak again.”  
“C’mon doll, don’t be like that. It’s water under the bridge…” 
His nonchalance enrages in you ways that you can’t describe, but rather than make a scene you smoothly shove him aside before uttering “asshole” and storming off towards the bar. 
Your frantic eyes search for your solace, of the man who can suture any wound that’s in desperate need of healing. You spot him from behind, noticing that he is speaking to a friend, his shoulder leaning on the bar as he patiently waits to pick up the drinks like he promised. Refusing to look back because you know Sukuna is probably on your trail, you breathe out your apprehension to compose yourself and keep one hand securely on your purse before steadily making your way towards to Suguru. 
You hear the two of them as you draw closer,  unintentionally eavesdropping on the conversation at hand. 
“Who’s the chick?” his friend asks. 
“A friend.” Suguru replies. 
“Which friend?” they press. 
“None of your business…” 
“Ah, one of your desperate clients I’m guessing?” 
You cease before making your presence known.
Stunned; your face boiling with embarrassment. 
“Shut up.” 
“It’s so obvious, Suguru-” his friend scoffs, “she’s practically crawling on your lap. It’s fucking pathetic, don’t you think?” 
Pathetic?
The word splits you into half.
Is that how Suguru sees you? 
Is that how everyone else does to? 
Something clicks then, every memory and act of kindness tainted with the thought the man was simply pitying you. That the root of his good-hearted nature was merely sympathy towards a sad, broken little rich girl. 
Suguru picks up the drink, mumbling a “fuck off” before turning on his heel only to find you standing there stupefied by his friend’s demeaning commentary. Only an idiot would assume that you probably didn’t hear a thing, but Suguru is far smarter than that. Whatever trace of the mask he’s been wearing dissipates then, and you see the genuine concern on his face. He parts his lips but you’re too wounded for an explanation, and you instantly dash past both of them, excusing yourself politely before speed walking your way towards the exit. 
You can hear him call out your name, but there is no way you would let that man see you crying after what was just said. 
Of course he doesn’t like me, you self-consciously deliberate, I pay him to fuck me. 
I pay him to fucking like me. 
A sob leaves you, and you cover your mouth with the back of your hand as you rush past the bouncer and dart out the front door, leaving a crowd of people staring at you with confusion. All of them hoping to make their way inside.
“Must be drunk,” one person says, while another screams at the bouncer “hey, can you let us in?! Someone just left!” 
You strut down the street, desperately trying to maintain your balance as you dab your eyes lest your tears ruin your make up. You hear someone call out your name, half hopeful that it might Suguru but when you glance over your shoulder all you see is the dreadful sight of your ex-boyfriend. 
You keep walking.  “Don’t follow me.” 
Sukuna is quick to catch up, practically jogging down the street and you curse your choice in footwear for slowing you down. 
“Then don’t keep running away.” 
You halt, the man nearly colliding into you from behind. 
“What?!” you spit out as you glare up at him. “What do you want from me?” 
Sukuna arches his brow, the smell of whiskey sticking to him. “The fuck got you so worked up?” 
You wipe away any leftover tears, your indignation towards this man overriding all other emotions. 
“None of your fucking business…” 
Sukuna reaches for your elbow, “Let’s not be testy. My car is in front of the bar. Let me take you home.” 
You already caught that eye sore of a ridiculously expensive sports car when you stepped out of club. “I’d rather walk home barefoot on a bed of hot coals then go anywhere with you.” 
“Don’t be like that, kitten…”
“Don’t,” you snapped, “call me that.” 
“You know I still nothing but love for you, right?” He slurs mildly, “Let me take you back to my place and we can talk-”  
His thumb grazes your elbow gently. Once upon a time you actually believed that his affection was real, but you’re older and wiser to know the truth now. “You miss my pussy,” you crudely admonish, “you don’t give a fuck about me.” 
He pinches your elbow with mild irritation. “Why don’t you tuck those claws back. I’m trying to have a fucking conversation.” 
“If a conversation is what you want, then speak to your fucking wife-” you hiss, striking a cord that makes Sukuna furrow his brows which brings you an odd sense of satisfaction. 
His face falls. 
You huff with approval. 
“What?” your mock, “cat got your tongue?” 
“Is everything alright?” 
You and Sukuna both halt, your heads twisting to face whoever spoke with Sukuna letting go of you faster than you can even blink. You only catch a tiny glimpse of his fear, the terror that somebody caught him in the act. 
Thankfully, it was only Suguru. 
Your body hums with relief. 
One hand is in his pocket, the other keeping a helmet tucked under his wing. His stance is relaxed but his irises are piercing daggers sinking into Sukuna’s skull.
“Everything’s fine-” Sukuna insists. 
“Suguru,” you call out at the same time, instantly going to him and finding your place by his side.
The word pathetic hammers in the back of your mind but you need deal with one problem at a time, and right now you don’t care about looking desperate if it means escaping the shackles of Ryomen Sukuna. 
Suguru’s eyes don’t leave your ex-lover, but he inches closer towards you to assert his ground. 
Sukuna frowns, the expression on his face all too familiar. 
You clutch Suguru’s sleeve, “Nothing to fret over. Do you mind taking me home?” 
He turns to face you, a mixture of worry with a flare of anger on that handsome face.  
“Yeah, I’ll take you home.” 
“Tsk,” Sukuna grumbles with frustration, “Don’t cheapen yourself by fucking off with some whore…” 
A static shock trickles each point of the triangle where you all stand. The hair on the back of your neck stands upright, your attention moving to Suguru whose entire face darkens with a fury that you’ve never seen before. He steps forward, his helmet dropping to his hand like he’s ready to wield it as a weapon, and the target is the spot on Sukuna’s skull that he’s been carefully observing. Your vision goes white imagining the outcome of this blow out, and you can practically hear the crack of the impact if Suguru follows through. 
Despite how much he deserved it, you know just how powerful Sukuna is. 
He would ruin Suguru without any remorse. 
“Suguru,” you beg, stepping forward and clutching onto his shirt as you reel him away from the man before you. 
His nostrils flare, the intoxicating poison of wrath swirling in his irises which quickly diffuses upon finding you. 
“Take me home?” You softly repeat, earnest and sincere, all the while erasing Sukuna from your presence entirely. 
It only takes a few seconds for Suguru to register your request, but he complies by reaching for your hand and knotting his fingers between your own. He grips it protectively, eyes looking straight ahead as he leads you down the street and far away from the chaos behind you. 
。゚•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• 。゚
The patter of your feet colliding onto the concrete surface echoes around you. A part of you is embarrassed, the other ashamed, a third grateful while a fourth shivers anxiously. You’re thankful that Suguru is at least allowing the silence to linger because it’s giving you a chance to settle from the roller coaster of emotions you just experienced. You try not to think about the pressure of his grip, or how the length of his fingers are wrapped securely around yours and instead piece together some semblance of an explanation worthy for him to listen to. 
You eventually decide that you’ll just grab a cab back to your place. That you’ll thank Suguru for playing the role of rescuer, and hand off the cheque that you’ve been holding onto. You won’t be a burden, bother him any longer or a do anything else to force his empathy. 
Suguru pauses in front of a jet black motorbike. The color itself blending into the darkness around you. You clear your throat ready to make your declaration, but you’re silenced when you feel the weight of his helmet press against your palms. 
“Wear this,” he commands. “I’ll take you to my place.” 
Your mouth goes slack, your practiced words shrinking to the back of your throat. 
His place. 
“Your place?” You find yourself whispering your thoughts out loud. 
Suguru reaches for the handle of his bike, tapping his index finger against it, his back facing you. “If you want.” 
He hops on before searching you for an answer. The look animates you back to reality and you nod your head before swiftly putting on the helmet. You find your place behind him, taking a second longer to adjust in your dress. You knot your arms around his waist, your eyes noting his exposed head. 
“You don’t have a helmet.” You point out. 
“I don’t live that far,” he answers back, “besides, I didn’t think I’d be traveling with precious cargo.” 
He taps his palm over your clasped hands. “Hold tight for me, alright?” 
You nod your head, covering your face with the shield visor before resting your cheek against his back. 
Suguru takes off. 
The wind whips against your bare arms, the pressure sweeping between your legs as Suguru swerves between each lane. The city blurs into vivid colors, only resurfacing when you come to an immediate halt at the traffic light. The adrenaline courses through your veins, the exhilarating sensation a thrill that you’ve never experienced before. Unfortunately, the journey was short lived and within twenty minutes you find yourself coming to a halt in an underground parking lot. 
Suguru parks the bike, hopping off before reaching his hand out to assist you. 
Your legs felt like jelly when it hits the surface, and you tumble on your own footing as Suguru reaches his other hand out to steady you by holding your waist. 
“You okay? Was I going to fast?” 
You take off the helmet, attempting to make yourself look somewhat presentable. 
“No, no” you answer a little breathless, “that…that was actually kind of fun…” 
“First time?”
You nod your head. 
Suguru hums. 
He takes the helmet away from you and directs you straight to the entrance of his apartment building. He pulls out an electronic key, and presses it against the elevator door. The elevator pings, the panels sliding open as you both step inside. Suguru clicks the button to his floor and you both stand on opposite sides watching the numbers go up.
Suguru lived in a newer development, you could tell when you walked through the hallway as he stands in front of his apartment door, and uses the same key to grant you both entrance. 
As you enter the hallway, you’re greeted by a wall with mounted iron hooks. There’s five to be exact, each one holding a different helmet with one space empty. Suguru fits the helmet back onto the vacant spot, before glancing over his shoulder and finding you still by the door struggling to take off your heels. 
He returns and kneels before you. His hands carefully moving your fingers away. 
“Let me help with that” 
“You don’t have to-” but you’re interrupted with him patting his thigh in gesture. 
You bite your bottom lip and place one foot against him, careful not to dig your heel into him. 
He delicately unravels the straps around your ankle and slips of the heel with a brush to the back of your calf, making the muscle twitch. 
“Other foot,” he instructs, then repeats. 
After placing your shoes neatly by the door, he stands up and reaches for your hand once more. “This way” 
You take it warmly, and follow him while trying your best not to acknowledge the noticeable height difference with you two standing side by side.
You never paid much attention to it before, you didn't have too really considering you both spent most of your time together in parallel positions. 
Suguru leads you into the living room, and a small gasp escapes you when you are met with floor to ceiling windows. The horizon is of the city skyline, but it’s half blocked by a decent size balcony which is covered in greenery. The scene contrasts the inside of Suguru’s apartment, which is more minimal. To your right is a small dining nook, the light above an accent piece that added some detail to the decor. To your left is a small furniture set, the sage green fabric making you avert your gaze with shame because your recognized that very same couch in most of Suguru’s videos. 
You find yourself quickly staring at your feet. 
“Can I get you anything to drink? Water? Tea?” 
“Tea would be great,” you answer back, returning to look directly at him from underneath your lashes. “Do you have anything herbal?” 
“Mhmm.” 
You follow him into the kitchen and realize that the man keeps his place meticulously clean. The back counter is what catches your attention the most. Suguru has a full serviced at home barista station set up for his own convenience. You pick out the coffee grinder, espresso machine, assortment of tea pots, jars of fresh leaves and coffee bags all neatly organized. 
Suguru pulls out one jar with a hand written label that reads "lemon balm and chamomile". 
You slip off your purse and place it on the counter behind him. “Did you make all these yourself?” 
“My parents used to run a tea shop in Hokkaido,” he answers back. 
“A tea shop?” You squeak, a little too excited from the morsel of information about his personal life that he just bestowed. “That must have been lovely…” 
“It was,” he answers, his voice growing small. 
You watch him fill the kettle with water, before placing it on the electric stove to warm up. He opens the jar, closing the gap of space between you both and lifts it to your nose. 
“Take a deep breath in,”
You oblige, and inhale. 
“Oh my,” you sigh out loud, your fingers subconsciously clasping over his own as your eyes flutter from the aroma of citrus, ginger, flora and subtle spice. It calms every firing nerve in your body. “That smells wonderful” 
When you open them again, you see that Suguru is looking at you thoughtfully. 
“It tastes good too,” he says proudly, and your heart glows at the reaction. “I was a terrible night owl as a kid. Still am, I guess. My mom used to make this to help me go to sleep…” 
“That’s really sweet,” you admit, wondering how lovely it must be to be looked after with such care. 
He slips away again, taking a spoon and putting a generous amount of the blend into a ceramic tea pot. You hear the tea bubble lightly, but your head spins as Suguru cages you in place while you both wait for it to reach the right temperature. Your back is against the counter, his arms by your side. 
“That guy you were talking to. Who was that?” He questions, cutting right to the chase. 
“Nobody important,” you confess, “he’s an asshole.”
“Tell me about it.” 
“I’m sorry about what he said to you. What he called you…”  
Suguru’s fingers dig into the counter, making the muscles in his arms flex with irritation. 
“Don’t apologize for him. Don’t apologize for any of them.” He firmly maintains. “Their words are empty to me...” 
“You almost bashed his head in,” you point out, a tiny smile easing the tension binding around the man before you. 
“I almost bashed his head because of the way he spoke to you-” 
Your eyes widen. 
Was he being protective? You think, but shake your head when you think of what kind of pitiful state you must have been that would cause Suguru to react in such a way. 
Pathetic. 
Your shoulders dwindle slightly and you shake it off to gather yourself once more. 
“He was a terrible mistake. I was young, and stupid. I thought I knew better when I really had no fucking clue…” 
You didn’t realize how bitter you sounded until two fingers press underneath your jaw.
His thumb taps your chin in a featherlight touch. “Is it over? Whatever it was?” 
“Of course,” you answer, the truth acrid on your tongue. “I’m to marry Naoya Zen’in, remember?”
Suguru frowns. “He’s no better. I told you that myself.” 
You circle your hand around his wrist. “I’ll take anyone over Sukuna. Even if that person is Naoya…” 
“Why can’t you just choose?” 
You press your lips together and sigh. “Because it’s a transaction. I’m a token in my father’s universe. If he weds me off to the Zen’in’s then it’s profitable. Good for business…” 
“I’m sure if you speak with him, he’ll understand-” 
“Don’t be so naive,” you answer as you return to meet his gaze. “My father doesn’t love me. He just owns me. I spent most of my adolescence alone while he was busy working or galavanting off with his mistress.  I think he assumed that if he kept shoving money my way, I wouldn’t notice his absence…” 
The kettle sings, making you both jump in place as the water bubbles aggressively and a small spiral of steam releases from the lip. Suguru returns to making your beverage. Picking up the kettle and pouring the hot water into the pot. He places it on a tray, along with a beautiful cup. 
“The tea needs a couple of minutes to steep. In the meanwhile, I’m going to change into something more comfortable.” He announces, “You want some spare clothes?” 
You look down at your designer frock, the material snug on your body. 
“Yeah, I’d like that” 
。゚•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• 。゚
You stare at yourself in the bathroom mirror. Suguru’s white shirt falls to your mid thigh, the material a little see through and revealing the bra you had on underneath. You eye the pair of worn boxers he handed to you to wear as shorts, but slyly tuck your bottom lip between your teeth before leaving it behind and walking out with your bare legs on display. 
You’re not quite sure what the plan is here, but you don't see yourself leaving anytime soon.
You head back towards the kitchen where you pick up your purse, your dress folded between your hands carefully. Suguru is opening the door to the balcony, having changed into a cut sleeve shirt that exposes his arms and a hint of his ribs, as well as a pair of loose shorts. When he hears you enter, his attention instantly falls to your plush thighs, a hint of crimson blushing his cheek. 
“Where can I keep my stuff?” You ask innocently, pretending to ignore his reaction. 
“Anywhere is fine,” he answers back, his voice thick. 
He tells you that he’ll wait for you outside, and in the meantime you put down your stuff onto the coffee table in front of his sofa.
You unzip your purse, Suguru’s cheque staring you at you with wide, scolding eyes. 
Pathetic. 
You furrow your brows at the voice inside your head, and swipe the payment before folding it and tucking it securely against your hip underneath the waistband of your underwear. 
You head outside, sliding the window close behind you. 
Suguru is sitting on a deck chair, the two of you camouflaged by the array of his overgrown plants. He pours your cup of tea, the aroma twirling between the current of the wind as he offers it your way. You pick it up, bringing it to your lips and taking a sip. A heavy sigh escapes you, and you remain standing leaning back against the cool glass surface as you stare out into the distance. 
“Like it?” Suguru asks, and you only notice then that he has also brought out a second cup for himself and is pouring his own drink. 
“It’s divine,” you respond. 
“I’m glad” 
The two of you sit in silence once more, mindlessly sipping your tea while contemplating the other person. You’re both at a clear standstill, carefully tiptoeing over the boundary that has so been strictly set in place. 
A reminder of that is the folded cheque digging into your skin. 
“How did you find out about contacting me?” Suguru randomly wonders. 
You look towards him and he shrugs before adding on, “I never asked. I find myself curious.” 
You thrum your nails against the glass cup, taking another sip of your tea before replying, “I saw you at a party with Satoru. I was with a group of friends, and one of them noticed me recognizing you. She asked if I was…familiar with your work. And when I told her I was she informed me that you both were…intimate.” 
“Was it Mei?” 
Your face falls at the blatant disregard of confidentiality. 
“How-How did you know?” 
Suguru huffs, and sips his tea. 
“She’s the only other client I had close to our age. Wasn’t hard to make the connection…” 
“Can I ask you a question?” 
“Go for it,” he replies. 
“I’ve always been curious as to how you wound up doing what you do,” you bite your bottom lip nervously, your hands trembling slightly holding your glass and you hope that Suguru wouldn’t notice your sudden unease. 
“Ah,” he acknowledges, his free hand moving to rub the back of his neck and you can’t help but sneak a peak at his abdomen from the side. “Well, I told you how I wound up making the videos. For a long time I just did solo work, but I knew I could make more money if I had on-screen partners to film with. I had a few good connections with some actresses and hired a friend to make a video with me…” 
You knew exactly which one he was talking about. 
The actress in question was well known, and the video was an amateur clip that was filmed on the very same couch that you walked passed earlier. 
You clench your thighs together. 
You don’t even want to admit how many times you came to that particular video. 
“I didn’t know it would blow up in the way that it did. Shoko and I made a killing off it. We both saw the potential and we wound up doing six full episodes - trying out different techniques, roleplaying in a few…” 
“But you stopped posting after that…” 
Suguru pauses. “How would you know that?” 
You swallow a big gulp of tea. 
“I might have been a big fan of your work before we met.” 
“Really?” He answers with a slight tilt of his head, clearly very amused. 
“I wouldn’t have reached out to just anyone, you know. But I was really interested in...your work, and when I learned about your little side gig. I couldn’t resist…” 
“Well, color me flattered, sweetheart.” 
You swirl the last bits of tea in your cup. 
“So, why did you stop posting?” 
“I kept the videos up. They’re good and I still make revenue with every ad or view. Satoru’s career was picking up around that time, and he had just gotten clean. He needed somebody to hold him accountable so I started tagging along at his events. I didn’t realize how many people would recognizeme. My first client wasn’t even "a client", he gestures with air quotes, "she was just some woman I met and slept with. I woke up the next morning to an empty hotel room. All that she left behind was an envelope of cash…” 
He pauses. 
“I didn’t know what to feel. A part of me was insulted but another part had never seen that much money handed over so easily. The videos were great but what I earned in a day, is what I got in just a few hours. I was in my mid-twenties, just left the brink of making ends meet and desperate for security. I deposited the cash and kept going. Somehow it snowballed into…” he gestures his arms out, “this.” 
He pours himself another cup of tea. “At first I was a little reckless. Took on too many clients it damn near gave me a health scare. So, I started spacing them out. Keeping to a set number a month and maintaining a high price. I didn’t think that so many people would actually pay for my services, but they do...and I'm comfortable.” 
“Does it ever overwhelm you?” 
“Not anymore. Keeping my partners to a minimum helps. I’m safe and get tested regularly, as I mentioned when we first met,” He lifts the teapot your direction to offer you a second cup, and you accept it by approaching him and allowing him to fill your glass. 
“The thing is I went from never knowing when I was going to eat to having three meals a day. I don’t think I’d change that for the world…” 
“What about your family? Your friends?” You find yourself mindlessly asking. "How do they feel about this?"
“Satoru and Shoko are the only ones who know. Everyone else thinks it’s porn that funds my life. As for my family,” Suguru stops, his voice scratchy as he quickly clears his throat. “Well, they don’t have to worry about it. My parents passed away when I was fifteen. It's just been me ever since”  
The tea burns your lip  and your body trembles at the statement. 
“I’m so sorry…” 
He shrugs his shoulder nonchalantly. 
There’s a heaviness in the air, and despite how hard he’s trying to hide it you can see how the memory tears him apart. 
“My mom passed away giving birth to me,” you find yourself disclosing to even the scale, “I think that’s probably why my father resents me so much. He never got a son, and lost his wife in the process” 
“I’m sorry to hear that too…” 
You mirror his shrug. “It’s weird. I find myself curious about her - but there’s a detachment when I look at her. Sometimes I think about how different my life might be if she was still around. Or, if she was just like my father and everything would still be the same…” 
“Well, since we are speaking of hypotheticals,” Suguru moves on, shifting the topic as he angles his body more in your direction. “If you had the freedom to whatever you wanted, what would you do?” 
“Me?” You gasp, shocked by his pointed question. 
He smiles an easy smile, “I don’t see anybody else around.” 
You hum thoughtfully. “This might take a minute…” 
He places his cup of tea on the tray by his side and then pats his free hand on his thigh. 
“C’mere and think.” 
Your heart flies up your throat, pulsing just at the base. “You want me to sit on your lap?” 
Suguru nods his head. 
You gulp down the vessel, returning it back to its place. You glide your way towards him, placing the tea cup just next to his own, before settling down onto his lap. 
Suguru wraps his arm around your waist, securing you close into his frame. 
“Do you hold your other clients like this?” 
He shakes his head no. 
“So, you like holding me…” you bluntly point out, “why’s that?” 
Suguru’s face is directly in front of yours, so beautiful you can almost faint right here in his arms. He fingers dig into your waist, his other arm curving over your thigh and gently drawing circles on your hip. 
“Because you fit nicely against me” 
A swarm of butterflies take flight, making you feel lighter than air. You swear he might kiss you then but instead he returns to his question. “So, tell me what would you do?” 
The answer comes to you far easier than you think. From the moment you saw him tonight, you know the truth in the depths of your heart. “I’d like to run away with you,” you confess before stuttering out, “or-or at least somebody like you. Someone who is kind and sweet and thoughtful...”
Suguru leans back against the chair, lifting up one leg and adjusting your positions. He’s careful not to kick the tray with the tea. 
“And where would we go?” 
You sling your arms around his neck, “anywhere - anywhere but here.” 
Suguru slides his palm over the slop of your rear, slipping it underneath the fabric of his shirt and tracing a line over the dimples on your lower back.
“What would we do?” 
“We could lay outside just like this and watch the stars.” 
He hums, “we don’t get any stars out here in the city...”
“No, we don’t.” 
“What else would we do?” 
His other hand starts to unbutton the front of your shirt, revealing the details of the lace underneath. He cups your right breast, his lips shifting to find your neck. 
“We’d do this too,” you sing merrily. 
“Look at stars and fuck our brains out?” He teases, his teeth nipping at your skin. “Sounds like a dream to me…”
He gropes the fat of your breast, unknotting every single secret. “what else?” 
“We’ll sleep all day, and kiss until we’re bored of one another…” 
The hand on your breast moves to circle your neck, Suguru’s thumb massaging the column. 
“I’d never grow bored kissing you-” 
Your body renders against his touch. “Suguru,” you moan, your lips seeking his own. 
Before you can even meet for the kiss, he mumbles your name and follows up with the claim: “you should run away with me.” 
You giggle, still living in the proposed fantasy. “I’m trying to…” 
“I’m being serious” 
The tone of his voice is the reason why you stop to kiss him, pulling away to face the man before you. 
There's no denying the truth on his face - he is actually quite serious about the declaration. 
You hear the dreaded word once more: pathetic. Pathetic because this man is an expert at fulfilling fantasies, is a professional when it comes to healing the hearts of the lonely.
Pulling yourself out of this delusional imagination, you push off him before standing up straight. 
“That’s not funny, Suguru” 
“Who says I’m being funny?” He responds sincerely. 
“What is this? What are we doing? What am I doing? You can’t just-” you lament, pressing your forehead to hand in disbelief as you enter the confines of his apartment, taking a second to breathe. “You can’t just say things like that-” 
He calls out your name again, but the kraken has already been released. 
He follows, tracking into his abode right behind you, all the while watching you stand in the middle of his living room with your quivering hands reaching for the waistband of your underwear.  
“This was a terrible idea. I shouldn’t have-I shouldn’t have gone through with all of this,” you yank out the cheque, showing it to him. “You don’t have to take pity on me. I know I’m just another desperate, pathetic client, alright? I promise you don't have to keep putting up with me and my drama after this. And you sure as hell don't have to keep giving me these mixed messages which only confuse me. I can’t have things getting complicated right before this engagement is about to happen. So, here. Take this cheque and let’s just forget everything else about tonight.” 
Suguru stands there, pensive. His eyes look to the folded paper in your hand, his chest rising and falling with each heavy breath. Instead of reaching for the paper, he simply walks past you, making you spin on your heel as you follow his movements with sheer bewilderment. 
He heads towards the shelf behind you and pulls out a tiny box. He removes something from it, before walking back and facing you once more. 
“Shit got complicated about eight cheques ago, sweetheart,” he negates, holding the thin stack papers between his two fingers as he brings it to your face. His eyes fall to to the crumpled one you are currently holding, “Well, counting the one in your hand, I’d say nine...” 
You can’t believe it.
You pick up the wad and sift through each paper; each cheque one of yours, the date issued a reflection of your last nine meetings with Suguru. 
None of them cashed in. 
“Why do you still have these?” 
Two hands find your waist, your forearms fall into Suguru’s chest as you stare mindlessly at the cheques fanned out between your fingers. 
“I didn’t have it on my conscious to deposit them once I realized my feelings for you. I'm sorry about what you heard earlier, but what Mahito said doesn't apply to you at all,” he responds. “You stopped being a client to me for quite some time...” 
You look up at him. 
His touch tightens around your waist. “You can’t marry Naoya. Or, you shouldn’t. But if you do, I don’t want us to stop seeing one another. We can work something out…”
“Suguru,” you pine, dropping the papers in your hand, each one twirling onto the ground, thousands at your feet. 
His lips catch yours in a subtle peck, all before circling over your bottom lip and sucking on the plush base. He slides his tongue between your lips, feeling yourcrumple into him as the paper crinkles beneath your feet. You moan feeling the sensation of his tongue slide across yours - he tastes like running across a field of chamomile flowers, like you’re holding a basket of fresh, ripe lemons. 
Like you're savoring the most beautiful sunrise. 
His hands return to finish unbuttoning your shirt, shrugging the material off your shoulders and exposing your expensive lingerie set. He grips your hips, your ass - his touch hungry before pressing his pelvis closer to your frame so you can feel his aching member beneath his shorts. 
You squeak into another kiss when he swiftly picks you up from the back of your thighs and carries you across the living room. 
He places you onto his sofa like you’re made of porcelain, keeping you on the edge as he kneels to the ground, his knees sinking into the rug. Two hands find your inner thighs which he pushes apart to reveal the pretty triangle fabric covering your sweet cunt. He kisses your clit over the material. Once, twice, three times…until you’re sighing into the pillow behind you. His tongue drags up, pressing your clothing against your sex, one hand drawing upward to find yours which he holds lovingly. His index and middle finger hook underneath your underwear, and he tugs it aside to reveal your slick coated pussy. 
He kisses your clit again, leaving a path down your damp lips which only makes you moan angelically. 
“This is why I’d never get bored kissing you,” he coos, “You sound like heaven whenever I do...”
Your only response is a vowel, your hand holding onto Suguru’s for dear life as he returns to eat out with such devotion it almost brings tears to your eyes. You pant softly, his wet tongue making you weep between your legs and he gathers your essence and swallows it to parch his craving. You whine feeling the snap of your underwear pinch into your skin when Suguru lets go of the material to mold his palm over the slope of your pelvis. His thumb strokes the back of your hand, his tongue sinking between your wet folds, lips suckling on the petals of your cunt. 
Your hips arch off the sofa, desperate for friction, but Suguru pins you firmly back down. 
“Easy, easy…” he appeases, “don’t cum just yet. Hold off f’me, just for a little bit…” 
He’s never asked because there was never a reason to. For the most part, he was always there to service you. Allowed you to use his body to get you off as many times as you so desired. 
Your voice breaks, “okay,” you answer, drawing out a long exhale when he dives back in. 
The hand on your pelvis climbs up the steps of your ribs, reaching for band of your bra right at the middle. He curls his finger over the boning, and tugs the material allowing your breasts to spill free. He finds the bud of your nipple and tweaks it between his finger, pinching and pulling the aching nub until your writhing beneath him. 
He slurps and sucks, while you moan and whimper, forcing yourself to hold off for as much as your can but you find that it’s far harder to do when your lower belly quakes as it sits on the brink of release. 
“Suguru, Suguru…” you beg, reaching your free hand to your breast and clenching over his fingers. “Suguru, I can’t-m’gonna cum if you don’t stop…” 
He groans against your cunt, pulling away from your pulsing core and letting go of your hand to wipe the dampness off his chin. 
He licks his lips, drunk off lust and of how you taste. 
He keeps his body upright, drags your legs to secure them around his waist as he straightens your back. His hands unhook your bra from behind, the scent of you strong on his lips as he leans up for a kiss. Your hands fall to his shoulders, your belly fluttering as your sex begs for more stimulation. 
Suguru loosens the bra, allowing it to fall to your elbows before kneading your breasts - his thumb swipes back and forth over your nipples. He devours your cry, wolfs down every panting breath as he moans into the kiss. Your hands slip underneath his shirt, taking in the lines of strong abdomen.
“Take if off,” you plead between breaths, “Take it off, please…” 
Suguru listens, breaking apart from the kiss to toss his shirt to the side while you slip off your bra. Your lover’s hand finds your waist, his fingers pinching into the soft flesh. He leans forward to kiss the side of your neck, making a path down the curve and across the field of your décolletage. 
“You’re gorgeous,” he murmurs into your breast, his lips snagging your nipple as his tongue rolls over the bud.
Your fingers curl around the back of his head, loosening his bun as you untie the knot. His hair falls like waterfall, the strands tickling your bare skin. Suguru’s hand slips between your legs, his middle and forefinger meeting your clit. You hiss at the contact, sinking your teeth between your bottom lip when Suguru sucks on your breast while simultaneously drawing circles on the bundle of nerves between your legs. 
Your breath grows heavier, your hips bucking into him from the sensation of his touch. 
“Feels good,” you mumble, “feels so good with you…”   
He shivers, relieving your breast as his lips search for your own. 
He adds more pressure between your legs, increasing the speed while your tongues dance. When your thighs noticeably quiver he slows down, pinching your clit between his fingers as he softly pecks your cheek. 
“The condoms are in my room…” 
Your sharp nails scratch the back of his neck lightly, “I have one in my purse.” 
Suguru nods feverishly, reaching back to the coffee table and rummaging through your purse. He picks out the shiny wrapper, and stands up to take off his shorts. 
“Wait, can I?” You request, gazing up at him with glittering eyes. 
Suguru swallows hard, and nods his head. 
Your eyes dilate rolling his shorts down, focusing on the tent in the fabric and watching his cock spring free and lightly smack his lower belly. Suguru brings the condom to his lips and rips it open with his teeth, but his eyes flutter when your perfectly manicured hands glide up the length of his shaft. 
You trace the prominent vein, your thumb swiping over the pre-cum beading over  the angry tip. You lick your lips, leaning closer to kiss the base and listening to Suguru sigh. 
You’ve only given him a blow job once before, and that was because you asked if you could. Suguru sets no expectations for himself when it comes to work, but that doesn’t mean that you haven’t fantasized about giving him head countless times. 
You wrap your fingers around his length and stroke mildly, your lips fanning over  his cock before reaching the tip. 
“Sweetheart, don’t-” Suguru murmurs in an attempt to stop you, but you’re already enclosing your lips around the head and pressing your tongue over the slit. 
His head falls back as you suck, a curse leaving him. 
You move slowly at first, dragging your tongue back and forth as you stroke the base. Sukuna was far rougher with you when you went down on him, but Suguru is allowing you to take him at your own pace. Inch by inch, until you were bobbing your head back and forth, strings of saliva webbing off his cock and sticking your lips. 
He thrusts once, not rough enough to hurt but the jerk catches you by surprise. 
You carefully release him, mindlessly wiping your bottom lip and the sight makes his cock twitch. 
Suguru pulls the condom out, and rolls it over his shaft. 
He settles onto the empty seta by your side, and you crawl over the expanse of his gorgeous, chiseled body to kiss him once again. 
His circles his fingers around his cock, his other hand guiding your hip as he aligns the tip to your entrance. Your nail nicks his pec when he pushes against the hole, your mouth circling over his own as you lower down his shaft. 
He fills you up so, so good. Makes your body vibrate with unshakeable desire. 
He groans until he bottoms out , the hand on your hip dipping down from your pubis to your lower belly like he’s trying to outline how deep he actually is before returning it back in place and securing his other hand on the opposite hip. 
Your breasts flatten against his chest, your hands holding on to his strong shoulders for support as you roll our hips.
Suguru works in tandem with your rhythm to fuck you passionately. 
His lips find yours once again for a final kiss, before the two of you get caught up in the moment when he swiftly picks up the pace. 
His hips arch violently, while yours sink - your bodies moving silk. 
“Unghh, oh god, yes-yes-yes~” you moan. 
Suguru’s grip almost feels painful, you know for a fact that he’ll be marking your hips with a few bruises. “Gonna cum-” he rasps, “s-shit, I’m fucking close-fucking close-” 
Your pussy tightens, practically holds his dick in a death grip that makes release a broken moan. His cock contracts upon his release, the sensation bringing you to the edge of yours as the muscles in your lower belly and inner thighs spasm around him. You leave crescents on his skin, your bodies shaking as you both take a second to breathe coming down from your climax. 
You collapse into him, his arms circling behind you, with his racing heart pulsing into your own. He moves so you’re laying side by side, your body sandwiched between him and the couch since he takes up most of the room. You rest your cheek against his shoulder, feeling him grow soft inside you.
Your stuttering breath finally finds a resting poin when he brings your hand and holds it against his heart. 
“Where do we go from here?” You whisper with a kiss to his neck. 
“Whatever you decide, we’ll figure out.” Suguru answers sincerely. 
“I can’t marry Naoya,” you admit out loud, shocked for actually saying it for the very first time. “And I can't share you with anyone else - it already kills me having to do so.” 
Suguru looks down at you, a reassuring smile resting on his lips. “There won’t be anyone else.” 
“I can't just...leave. I can't just drop everything and walking away. It isn’t going to be easy-” you add on, “It’ll take me some time.” 
“I can wait” 
“It might get messy…” 
“When is it ever not?” 
“But we’ve never been in a relationship-” you insist, logic breaking through the barrier of your happiness. “How do we know if this will even work out properly? What if this thing between us fades?” 
“I guess we’re both taking a gamble here…” 
You both stare into the other’s eyes. 
“Do you think it’s worth the risk?” You ask. 
Suguru’s face softens but he leans forward to kiss your forehead. 
“I think it’s worth a try.” 
。゚•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• 。゚
TWO YEARS LATER
“You running out on Naoya on your wedding night is still the hot topic.” Kento explains over the phone, “People kept bringing it up, and for whatever reason they just can't seem to get over it.” 
The guilt in your stomach twists into a very small knot, over time the size of it has shrunk to a point where you not longer carry any remorse regarding your scheming behavior. 
You had a plan, and the plan worked. 
"Let's not forget who was there to help..." you contend, disregarding the negativity surrounding your decision.
After you and Suguru spoke, you decided to carry on the facade, agreeing to the engagement and soon after the wedding with Naoya Zen'in. All the while you and Suguru were busy planning your way to cut and run. He cashed in your unsigned checks, and you pilfered a decent amount of the wedding budget which you kept into a seperate savings account.
You played the role as obedient daughter well, and no one was the wiser. 
“Besides, I maintain that it's still the best decision I ever made,” you reply, stepping out of your room and into the kitchen where you are greeted by the sound of clinking dishes.  
Your eyes shift to Suguru - his hair far longer now, flowing beautifully down his back, the front layers tied into a small bun. You smell dinner in the air, and your stomach grumbles with anticipation. 
Nanami doesn't reply, but you can hear that he's distracted from the television in the background. 
“What are you watching?” you ask your friend. 
The man simply sighs. 
“Nothing.” 
“Doesn’t sound like nothing with that reaction. Is it Satoru’s new drama show?” 
At the mention of his best friend you notice your lover glance over his shoulder, quietly tilting his head to direct you towards him. You smile his way, your feet pattering against the hardwood floor as you move closer to him. He bundles one arm around your shoulder, keeping you close while continuing to sauté the vegetables in the pan. 
He kisses the top of your head. 
“It’s all the rage,” you add on to your phone call, “Suguru and I plan on watching the next episode tonight.” 
Kento remains quiet. 
You release yourself from Suguru’s grasp, and instead hop onto the kitchen counter right next to him.
He reduces the heat and picks up the lid before covering the pan. 
“I’m guessing you two haven’t-” 
“No,” Kento curtly replies. “Not since that night…” 
“I’m sorry” 
“Don’t be,” he responds with frustration. “I screwed it up” 
“You know I could just ask Sugu too reach out-” 
“ Don’t,” Kento sighs regrettably. “It doesn’t matter. I heard he’s moved on” 
You quirk your brow, your eyes shifting to Suguru who was back to chopping some fresh herbs. 
“Oh?” 
“It’s for the best I guess,” Kento reassures. “He should be happy with whoever-the-fuck he chooses.” 
“You deserve happiness too, Kento.” 
“You can be happy for the both of us,” he replies, gulping down a drink. “Anyway, I’ve got to go. I’m meeting my lawyer for dinner.” 
“When are you going to visit us next?” 
“Probably around November, December. I just need a few things to ease up on my end-” 
You bite your bottom lip, “I look forward to it.” 
“Take care, love” 
“You too, Ken.” 
You hang up the phone and lean your head against the cupboard as you watch Suguru rinse his hand, a trail of crimson spiraling down the faucet.  
“I cut my finger” 
You pick up a clean towel by your side, and gesture him towards you. 
Suguru extends his thumb out, and you curl the fabric over to keep pressure on the small cut. 
“You ought to be careful” 
“Your legs are a distraction,” 
You stare up at him playfully, and he leans down to kiss the corner of your lips. 
“How’s Nanami?” 
Your lover is indebted to your friend. If it wasn’t for Nanami, the two of you wouldn’t have been able to set up this comfortably. He’s the one who found you the humble two-story abode in Hokkaido, and was also the person who set up your personal bank accounts while ensuring that you would both have a safe and quick getaway on the night of your almost-wedding. 
“Fine, I think-” you reply, before removing the towel to check the damage. Thankfully, it wasn't anything serious. A little deeper than a paper cut.“Licking his wounds over a broken heart, but fine.” 
Suguru reaches for the drawer next to you, and pulls out the emergency band aids. You reach for the box in his hand, taking out one and removing the plaster from the back. You secure it around his cut, and Suguru holds your fingers between his. 
He arches down to kiss your brow. “Thank you, sweetheart.” 
“You’re welcome, handsome” 
“Dinner will be ready in a few if you want to set the table” 
You nod your head in acknowledgement, and drop down onto the ground before proceeding with your task.
You set the place mats down, a bowl for the soup and another for the rice and cooked vegetables. Your finger traces the rim of the one in front of your seat, a tiny chip from when you accidentally dropped it in the sink while cleaning it a few weeks ago. 
Fragments of these blemishes are all around you - making you almost forget that you once lived in a perfect, curated bubble. But you would take these flaws over everything else. These markings may be worn, but they are a reminder of the home you've been building.
A home that is entirely yours. 
“Baby, you want a drink?” Suguru calls from the kitchen. 
“Melon soda, please” you reply, placing the bowl down. 
“We’re out, I’ve got to pick some up tomorrow.” 
“What are you having?” 
“A beer,” he chuckles, and it sends a tremor of joy between the valves of your heart. 
“I’ll share yours” 
Suguru pulls out the bottle, cracking the cap off as he pops it using the side of the kitchen counter to do so. 
You two meet each other halfway in the space that you've been nesting in. Suguru’s eyes never leave yours when he takes the first sip, and once done he passes the chilled bottle towards you.
“Am I ever going to have you back in the kitchen helping me with dinner?” 
You shake your head no, and bite at the lip of the bottle before taking a sip. “I thought we agreed I was a hazard after the raw chicken fiasco and the almost-fire debacle…” 
He laughs, “no, you agreed. I said it wasn’t a big deal” 
“You just said that because you love me,” you respond, pressing the bottle into his chest as he takes it from your hand. 
“That goes without saying…” he answers, slinging his arm around your waist and pulling you into his frame. 
You lift yourself up on your toes, and kiss his nose. 
“Do you think it’s worth the risk of me attempting to cook for you again?” You whisper against his lips. 
Suguru smiles, a hand cupping your cheek as he leans forward to seal his reply with a  kiss. 
“I think it’s worth the try” 
。゚•┈꒰ა ♡ ໒꒱┈• 。゚
tag list: @rottiens @an-ever-angry-bi @mononijikayu @brownskinnedgirll
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neuvistar · 1 year ago
Text
OUR SWEET DOVE.
— featuring ┊ jing yuan x fem!reader x blade (poly!jingren comeback !)
— warnings / content warnings ┊ all consensual. not proofread, mentions of pregnancy, unprotected s3x, oral (m!receiving, most specifically bladie <3), s!ze k!nk again if u squint hard enough, reader implied 2 be a lil smaller than them <3, she/her prns used once(?), petnames used, bladie referred 2 as “yingxing” like once or twice idk, overall suggestive content. 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
— a/n ┊ poly jingren thirsts make a comeback! >:) i might turn this into a series called like whqt.. babymaking marathon LMFAO like separate hsr, genshin, + jjk characters to celebrate 2000+ but i’ll think abt it! wrote this during ovulation too guys this is NOT good.. anyways i don’t have a specific theme for this, it’s just.. them.. being them! ur on ur way to heaven AND motherhood !! (jokes.. unless..) god bless ur hips and waist ! goooodddd blessss you! <3 reblogs n feedback r appreciated <3
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you were sure that time itself seemed to have stopped. how many times have you came, two times? three? four? you couldn’t even count anymore.. your mind and your thoughts were a mere blur to you, your lips locked with jing yuan’s in a moment of love as your breath grew more and more shallow by the second. your mind was blank, only filled with one thought.. blade and jing yuan’s soft caresses all over your body. your body moving in perfect harmony and rhythm with jing yuan’s as he attacked your mouth with his own.. tongue tangled with yours while blade kept one of your wrists pinned down to the pillow, his lips working on the flesh of your stomach as his arm kept your legs spread all nice for them. he was good with his fingers.. you can’t deny that. you can’t deny the pleasure that flows through your body when he thrusts his fingers deep inside your now-soaked cunt, it was a sight to see for both of them.. blade couldn’t help but let a smirk sneak through his lips as he curled his fingers, gazing up to see a reaction out of you. your hands clutched the general’s shoulder tighter, eyebrows furrowing at the mere curl of blade’s fingers in your walls, you weren’t complaining.. it felt nice.
you were a mere cocoon of love.. all thoughts, senses and senses, forgotten for you only focused on the present. you only focused on the three of you in this very moment.. how slowly your tongue danced with jing yuan’s, how fast blade was plunging his fingers in your pussy, it was too much to handle but you couldn’t complain no matter how hard you wanted to. no matter how hard you wanted to scold both of them, you were always silenced by the general’s lips. “spread your legs more, dove. he can’t fuck you with his fingers any faster if you keep closing them now, can he?” jing yuan broke the heated kiss between you both as he cooed inside your ear, his voice deep and filled with honey.. you were sure that they were filled with lust as well.
your back arched as you came all over blade’s digits from jing yuan’s lewd words. blade swiftly pulled his fingers from your insides, moving them in a scissoring motion as he stroked his cock, glancing over at jing yuan who pressed chaste kisses along your neck. “i think she’s ready enough, look how much she came.” the dark haired man hummed, slapping your cunt harshly as he earned a sharp gasp from your lips. “y—yingxing!”
“mm.. you sure did come a lot, dovey. it’s a shame we’ll be making you come a lot more today.” with a deep groan, jing yuan slammed his hard cock inside your soaked hole as a soft soft moan left your lips in an instant, he gripped your thighs to keep your legs from moving any further. “oho.. would you look at that.. your cunt’s already sucking me in. you’re a naughty girl aren’t you?” he taunted you further.. before you could even say anything, your words were silenced by blade’s cock. “come on.. you know how to suck right, pretty? go on. suck. suck it like you mean it.” you wasted no time as you allowed your tongue to swirl itself around his dick using one hand to stroke the areas you couldn’t reach, the warm feeling of your hot mouth around him was enough to drive blade absolutely feral.. oh how much he loved those sweet facial expressions of yours, how much he loved it whenever you tried your best not to gag.. how much he loved how easily his cock can twitch and slide itself inside your pretty little mouth. “that’s it.. f-fuck! keep.. sucking me off like that..”
your mouth moves against blade’s cock, taking him in so good and so well just as he wanted you to.. the male savoured the moment like you were a sweet treat, using your mouth to pleasure himself as he presses himself closer to your lips to thrust the rest of his length further down your throat, his fingers running through your hair. another other hand moves towards the side to wrap you in a tight embrace, jing yuan’s body shifting towards yours as the heat from your skin mixed with his.. his hips repeatedly slamming themselves against yours as some of your cum formed a ring around his cock. you felt so sticky already and they weren’t the ones cumming inside of you, your cheeks heated up at the mere thought of both of them filling you to the brim once more.
jing yuan stared down at your smaller frame beneath him, swallowing the single lump in his throat as his cock twitched inside of your gummy walls by the sight of you gagging on blade’s length. you were.. so small compared to the both of them.. it was enough to even turn him on! jing yuan shook his head, increasing his pace as he held your thighs down to your stomach to see more of your glistening and wet cunt. if only you knew just how much you were making him crave you further from how small you were, taking him and blade’s dicks like it was nothing. jing yuan’s thoughts began to wonder, how much can you take until he and blade break you? how much more can you handle? it was a question worth answering, his nails digging into your skin as he was determined to breed you and fill you up, maybe get you pregnant.. he wanted to see how much more you can handle.. how much more you can take until you can’t anymore. “if only you could see what i was seeing, lovely. y’know, you’ll make me cum faster with all your lewd facial expressions alone.. such a good girl. taking yingxing’s cock and mine so well now, are you?”
sweat was almost trickling along your forehead, your entire body was drenched in sweat.. catching sight of blade’s satisfied smirk on his face, his dark yet long wavy black hair was scattered all over the place, but he couldn't care any less at this point.. he gathered all your loose hair as he used them to keep your head still. blade kept a firm grip on your hair, thrusting his cock further into your mouth. honestly.. you weren’t even sure if your jaw would be alright the next morning.
your felt your legs shake. your own heart begin to flutter. your body trembled in your husbands’ holds, jing yuan continued to nibble on your skin as he lightly wrapped it around his fingers, moving them up and down your thigh. his kisses that danced along your tits were soft and tender, your heart raced and your breath grew heavy at the pleasure they both provided for you at that very moment. blade reached down to cup one of your breasts as his large hand engulfed it whole, twisting your hardened nipple to force a whine out of you. “pretty tits you have here, [name]. look at them, aren’t they pretty?” he glanced over to the white haired male as he replied with a nod, “indeed.” you squirmed under blade’s touch, a whine was the only thing that passed from your lips as your head tilted to the side, pulling away from his cock. your moans grew, an indication you were close.. you felt blade grabbing onto one of your hands as he made you stroke his dick at a fast pace. jing yuan bit his lip at the sight, watching his cock slide between your legs so smoothly, picking up the pace of his thrusts, slowly losing himself in your cunt. “it’d be a miracle if you gave us a baby or two, sweetest. do you think you can handle that?”
“a baby or two? why stop at that? if it were up to me, i’d fill her up with a dozen.” blade scoffed, his breath hitching as he grew close.. your thumb teasing his tip. jing yuan playfully rolled his eyes at blade’s bold claim, running his fingers through his hair as he placed his hand over your stomach. “mm.. we’ll see what she thinks. how about five, princess? is five good enough for you?” he rubbed your stomach gently, subconsciously feeling his cock thrusting in and out of you.. his lips curving into a sly smirk. “right here, beautiful. just imagine, your belly filled up.. all swollen and full of five little baby birds,”
“can you handle that, our sweet dove?”
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