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mins-fins · 6 months

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orbit of yours !

"power couple, really?" "you have to listen to me!"

synopsis: park jisung has always admired you. hardworking, effortlessly beautiful, talented, humble— you're pretty much the personification of the word 'perfect' (you would disagree though), but your relationship has never gotten past "admirers that occasionally exchange words", so jisung has vanquished the idea of possibly being in love with you because of your lack of interactions, he's just an avid admirer of yours! so when a few accidents and mishaps force (more like drive) the two of you to be in the same room more than you ever had in the past, the idea doesn't just remain a random fantasy crafted by jisung's mind, it becomes reality.

pairing: park jisung x male!reader

genre: high school au, acquaintances to friends to lovers, photographer!reader x soccer player!jisung, fluff, kinda comedy (im not funny), mutual pining, literally no angst, fast burn lowkey, sungchan helps reader realize his feelings and it's hilarious

warnings: swearing, mentions of burnout, oblivious bitches deny their feelings for a good 10k words, this is fucking cheesy, the nightmare which is senior year

word count: 12.2k

notes: GOOD LORD IT IS FINALLY DONE! i don't wanna be overdramatic or anything but this is genuinely one of my most favorite works ever, if you couldn't tell i am VERY jisung biased and im so happy to finally be done with this because it's honestly been so fun to write 🙁 i didn't beat the xiaojun fic in terms of words but this the second longest fic i have ever written and for my jisung debut its impressive that there is absolutely NO ANGST here, i'm just very proud of myself for this and i hope people like reading it as much as i enjoyed writing it.. this is for all the park jisung lovers 👍

"WHEN WILL YOU ACTUALLY GET A PARTNER?" chenle asks the question so many times that jisung assumes the sentence has been programmed into his brain. what is it— like the 3rd time this week? he thinks chenle might be more obsessed with his love life than he is with actual important things, like college, graduation preparations, his role as a member of the student council, anything but jisung's uneventful love life, because that was probably the least interesting thing going on in his own life at the moment. "come on jisungie! i heard aejung has a crush on you!" he lets out a familiar groan, giving his friends a 'cut it out' look. "i don't really care about that kind of stuff.."

he hears all the frustrated sighs from his friends, and jisung just chuckles. he knows about the many surprisingly many— people who find themselves attracted to him. he acknowledges the fact that he has a lot of admirers, that a lot of people would perceive themselves as lucky to be in a relationship with him, he isn't new to the idea at all, he doesn't really get what makes him so attractive, such an eyeopener to his fellow students, but he mostly accepts the gifts given to him by his so called "admirers" nonetheless, not wanting to make them disappointed.

now, he says mostly because there are just times where he has no choice but to turn them down. some people get into their own heads too much, and he doesn't want to give some of them false hopes by accepting their gifts. that happened once, where a girl thought the two of them were dating because he decided to accept her gift as a sign of appreciation, that's when jisung learned that he couldn't just accept any and all gifts given to him by admirers who so greatly wanted a chance with him. jisung isn't so concerned about gifts, he wants a person who will be psychically and emotionally present for him, not someone who'll just buy him random things.

"it's gotten a little annoying.. all the confessions" jisung mutters, closing the textbook he had been jotting in. "they're nice yeah but some people just take it too far" he finally finishes, earning some confused looks from his friends. he just shrugs, shoving the textbook he had previously been jotting in into his backpack.

"but you're just so boring!" chenle whines, pressing his cheek against jisung's shoulder. jisung doesn't even try shaking him off, knowing that any of his attempts will be useless. "come on! all these people who would love to be with you and your still a lonely little loser!"

"loser? oh come on!"

"you know i'm right!"

jisung scoffs, lightly shoving chenle. while yeah, it's nice to have a lot of people admire him, everyone expects him to do this and that and act a certain way. it's like they enjoy perpetuating a false image onto him rather than actually admiring him for who he really is, and jisung doesn't think he should give people like that the time of day, they piss him off more than anything.

he's a little lost in his thought when a familiar voice sounds in his ears, a couple of giggles following the sound. "you're too funny y/n!" one of them shouted, poking a familiar figure in the shoulder, and jisung's eyes fall on you immediately, as if on instinct. you were looking as you always did, a familiar dslr camera hanging from your neck, that polite smile on your face as your friend continues poking your shoulder.

lately, you'd been quite the topic of interest among your fellow schoolmates. now that's not abnormal at all, you somehow always manage to be the talk of the town in school, you could do the smallest thing and somehow people could still make huge talk about it.

jisung would never say it, not out loud or even in mutters to himself, but he's always held a unique admiration for you, one he doesn't think he could actually put into words. there's something about you that pulls jisung in, like your a magnet and he's an oblivious piece of metal, slowly getting closer and closer to you without being able to do anything about it.

everything about you is beautiful. your eyes are a beautiful brown color, your smile is a beautiful stretch that shows off your perfect white teeth, your hair is a beautiful mix of raven and brunette. oh, and your voice is so beautiful too, it's so soft, gentle, but also deep.

you're like an angel.

at least to jisung you are.

it's pretty funny, actually, your so wrapped up in your own things that you barely notice the sheer amount of people who want to date you. you don't acknowledge romantic advances a lot, and even when you do, it always ends in rejection. you talk a lot, and your words are always pure and witty, your laughter is natural, your smile is contagious.

but.. jisung doesn't like you. he only likes you in the friend kinda way, he just wants to be friends with you. you look nice! smell nice, dress nice, speak nice..

jisung knows a lot more about you than his friends do. despite the fact that the two of you have never officially deemed yourselves "friends", he's always known little facts about you, as you him. the two of you have been going to school together for seven years, so the idea of not knowing anything about each other seems ridiculous.

you're a photographer, your favorite color is blue, specifically lighter shades, your favorite subject is history, your lucky number is 2 because of your birthdate being 02/02/02, your favorite flowers are daisies, you don't really enjoy sports, but if you were to choose one to play, it'd be baseball, and you want to go to college for journalism.

but jisung can't say that he likes you, because even if you two know all these things about each other, you've never considered yourselves "friends", all you do is admire from afar—

and when you do interact, it's just short and sweet sentences exchanged between you two, mostly because the both of you are so busy, that you can't afford to just stop and talk. sometimes, jisung wishes his life was just a little less hectic and he could stop and talk to you, because that's what he wants to do.

"what's with you?" jisung immediately yelps as chenle flicks his forehead, and he resists the urge to punch the older in the face. "gawking at y/n? really?"

"i'm not—" jisung hates that he feels his face burn. "i'm not gawking, i'm just.. i was just looking at him".

"looking at him with hearts in your eyes".

jisung scoffs at chenle's audacity, as if he wasn't doing exactly that a good few minutes ago. he would never admit it out loud before, so why should he admit it now? he'd never live it down if anybody ever found out..

"you know.." chenle begins, tapping his finger onto the desk in front of him. "you two would be a great couple" and the words are enough to make jisung roll his eyes once again. "a power couple!"

"power couple, really?" jisung raises an eyebrow, chenle never fails to say something that confuses him. he finds the words to be ridiculous, but his reaction just seems to make chenle even more giddy, because he continues;

"you have to listen to me!" chenle persists, and jisung is about to check out of the conversation completely.

"y/n is a photographer for sports journalism, you play soccer, you've known each for what.. ever? he's pretty, you clearly have the hots for him—"

"i do not!" jisung immediately yells in rebuttal, much louder than he wanted to. "yeah he's.. cute but anyone with eyes can see that, i'm not in love with him or anything".

chenle raises an eyebrow, suspicious, but jisung remains stubborn, crossing his arms as he averts his gaze from his best friend.

yes, you are cute, anybody with two functioning eyes can see that.

"i think park jisung might have a crush on you".

at the words, you look up from your camera, meeting eyes with your close friend, sungchan. you blink, as if dumbfounded, then snicker. "park jisung? are you trying to boost my ego or something?"

you know park jisung, you know about how probably half the students in this room dream of having a chance with him. so many people like park jisung, so many people want park jisung.

and if you think about it, you can't exactly blame them for that..

"don't laugh! i'm serious! he looked like he was about to devour you, did you see his eyes!?"

the words just get another laugh out of you, the words seem ridiculous in your eyes, because why would park jisung, beautiful, talented, striking park jisung have a crush on you? in your eyes, your pretty much nothing to him.

"okay.. why would park jisung ever be interested in me?" you ask, rearranging your camera as you raise an eyebrow at sungchan, who simply deadpans at you, that familiar 'are you serious?' look in his eyes.

"okay let me see, your smart, pretty, everyone likes you at this point, also— the two of you are pretty much perfect for each other! you'd be a power couple!"

you furrow your eyebrows, a power couple? you'd never heard that phrase used to talk about somebody your friends had been "shipping" you with, your not even sure if you can even consider yourself friends with jisung, because the two of you can never actually talk to each other without someone coming up and interrupting the interaction.

you'd love to just be able to talk to park jisung, just the two of you, one on one.

"power couple? that's funny.."

"you think everything is funny" ironically, you laugh at your friends words. "this could be like— your only chance at having an actual romantic connection with someone".

"i don't care that much about romance, chan" you muse, humming as you turn off your camera. your eyes wander over to jisung, who is very much distracted by something stupid chenle is saying, he's laughing about something, laughing hard too.

there is no reason for him to look so pretty as he laughs like a maniac..

he's cute, you say in your mind, he is absolutely adorable.

"WHAT DID YOU GUYS GET ON THAT STATISTICS TEST FOR SONG?" a boy from the same year and member of the soccer team along with jisung inquired. they sat on the bleachers in front of field, watching as the baton club practices. they have to practice this week, unfortunately, so jisung's schedule had become tight and packed, he barely had any free time these days, it was all exams, college tours, last minute extracurriculars, and practice, practice, practice. "i got a b plus" one of his classmates responds, the other responded; "i got a b on mine". jisung was very far removed from the current conversation, his eyes on a familiar trio of sports journalists on the other side of the field, a trio which included you, mesmerizing you. he sees you often these days, with that same dslr camera around your neck, a pretty smile stuck on your face.

"you, jisung! what score did you get?" one of his classmates asks, but jisung was occupied, so he didn't answer. a tap on his shoulder makes jisung snap out of his staring fit, and he blinks a few times, assessing where he is. "what?"

"we were asking about the marks on the recent statistics test!"

"ah" jisung presses his lips together. "i got an a plus" he says the words casually, but it causes for a cheer to be sounded by his fellow classmates, who shook him and slapped his back supportively.

"you're so smart jisungie!"

the praise from his classmates get a smile out of jisung, but he isn't focusing on that, his attention is on you. even with how your across the field, he can clearly see all of your features, the sun shining on your face makes you look majestic, like an actual angel, jisung isn't sure why he's even focusing so much on your face, but he can't focus on anything else, because his eyes just naturally always wander over to you.

"will this ever finish?" you inquire, pertaining to the baton club, who were still on the field even after they were supposed to get off. "i'm supposed to take photos of the soccer players for my editorials.." you mutter, it'd be horrible if you couldn't even deliver on the promise you made to your superiors.

"they're probably going to split the field" your fellow sports journalist, taehyun says. a small groan escapes your lips, you're annoyed, you hope this doesn't interfere with the photos you have to take, it'd be horrible if you just ended up doing the same thing all over again. "see? baton club is taking one side and the soccer team takes the main area because they need to start practicing now".

"they look so cute! i've always wanted to be apart of the soccer team!" lee sohee exclaims, and you turn towards him, a look of interest on your face. he attentively watches the boys, humming to the song that's playing. "why didn't you join them then?" you inquire, interest peaked.

sohee smiles at you, readjusting his camera and fixing his posture. "i enjoyed writing the editorial articles more" he shrugs. "wanted to try out but i missed the tryouts because eunseok hyung would have killed me if i missed anton's recital" at the words, you laugh, used to the behavior from the older boy.

"maybe next year".

"you'd fit in perfectly!" taehyun muses, and sohee brightens up, seemingly loving the words.

"really!? that's what seunghan tells me too!" he cheers at the words, looking proud of himself. "i'd look cute in that uniform though.."

you chuckle at sohee's word, finding him to be absolutely adorable. "yeah, you definitely would" you ruffle his hair, smiling at the giggle which sounds from the boy.

"i'm gonna go get a closer look at them" you say, motioning towards the soccer team. taehyun nods and watches as you get closer to the field, not super close, but close enough that your camera can capture a good view of the soccer team. you narrow your eyes, pointing your camera at the busy boys who are doing their usual routine, the viewfinder shows jisung in all his glory.

you take pictures, zooming in and out. you don't mean to put all the focus on jisung, he's just too alluring to not be the center of attention. he's such a natural, he's just so amazing, you can't not focus on him.

[click.]

and another shot, another one as jisung scores the goal. jisung's posture was perfect, his back straight, chin high as he wore an angelic smile. jisung hears the clicking of the camera, and looks to his left to see you, in the viewfinder you see jisung looking in your direction, you pause for a moment and notice a baton heading straight towards him.

"jisung watch out!" you yell, at the words, he tilts his head.

you quickly take the strap of the camera off your neck, throwing it until it landed right beside your fellow journalists, who looked as confused as jisung did. you ran as fast as you could, grabbing jisung's wrist and pulling him close to you.

the baton managed to hit the ground instead, and jisung shrieks as he loses his balance, toppling forward. he quickly grabs onto the closest thing to him.

you.

you lowered your arms to catch jisung, and you feel him hold onto the sleeves of your blazer, one of your arms on his stomach, the other on his waist. all his weight was in your arms, causing for you to lose balance too.

"shit—" you swear, falling onto your back. jisung fell on top of you, the grass tickling his skin. your back immediately hits the grass, and your head hits the ground softly, but your arms remain around jisung. jisung's hands were still on your arms, his upper body laid on top of yours, his head was buried into your shoulder, and he was sat in between your legs.

jisung takes a sharp breath, a look of worry quickly flashes in his eyes as he sees you. "holy shit y/n are you okay!?" jisung asks, pulling away from your prior position and you sit up, opening your eyes to meet his worried ones. jisung kneels, leaning closer to you as he cups your cheeks with his hands. "did you get hurt? is your head okay!?" he asks, or yells, turning your head to inspect for any signs of wounds. you just stare at him, his bangs that messily lay against his forehead, his eyes that glimmered under the sunlight, and his pink lips that you totally just want to lean over and touch with your own.

"yeah.." you whisper, your cheeks squished from the force of jisung's hands.

jisung stops turning your head and sighs. "are you sure?" he asks, still holding your face. you nod, placing one of your hands on jisung's, his are soft, yours are rough, you note. you move his hand and smile. "i'm alright don't worry" you respond, still holding jisung's hand. jisung pursues his lips, and he extends his hand out, pulling you up from the ground. you let go of his hand, dusting off your pants.

"jesus y/n" taehyun's voice sounds from behind you, and you finally glance away from jisung, eyes focused on your friend. "are you okay? your not injured are you?"

"i'm fine.." you mumble again, blinking as taehyun suddenly hands you your camera. ah, he'd picked it up for you. you take it, inspecting it to make sure it's not broken.

"is the camera okay?" jisung inquires, looking over your shoulder to stare at it.

luckily, it wasn't damaged because it had fallen on the soft grass. "it's still working" you respond, and the two boys beside you let out a sigh of relief, with taehyun placing a hand on his chest.

"jisung! come back here!" his coach quickly yells, jisung looks to you, then back to his teammates. "thanks, i owe you" he says before running back towards his group, fetching the soccer ball he'd left on the ground prior.

"wow your like a hero!" sohee exclaims, shaking your shoulder with a smile. you just let out a nervous laugh, scratching your arm. you give one last glance at jisung before you feel your face heat up excessively, so you quickly turn away, putting your camera back around your neck.

"we should go back in now" you say, you don't say any more words as you quickly make your way towards the doors. your friends blink, exchanging glances in confusion, but they quickly follow you back inside.

"y/n! wait up!"

jisung watches you three leave, feeling his heart racing against his chest.

what the hell just happened? he asks himself.

"jisung are you okay!?" a very familiar voice shrieks. jisung turns to meet his fellow teammate jooyeon, looking concerned as ever.

"i'm alright, thanks for asking" he answers, gaze lowering down to his nails, which he quickly starts picking.

"are you sure? you looked like you hit your head pretty hard" the younger boy, as always, just wants to make sure jisung isn't lying, he's genuine like that. he pokes jisung's forehead, as if he was inspecting him.

"seriously, i'm fine" jisung lowers his hand, giving him his default 'i'm okay' smile. "y/n cushioned the blow anyway.."

"you were so close to him!" jisung startles as keum donghyun comes out of nowhere. "how did it feel? was it like a dream come true?"

"i—" jisung is speechless, he closes his mouth and blinks a good seven times before even actually assessing the question.

how did it feel?

jisung doesn't know how to express it. he didn't want to think about it in that way because you'd just done such a good deed, you saved him from flying metal going straight towards his head, he shouldn't have been thinking about the lack of distance between you two, he shouldn't have been staring at your lips, and he shouldn't have been thinking about kissing you.

his face must be so unbearably red right now.

"don't ask that! it was just very abrupt.. also, i can't think of him like that! he saved me from a flying baton, i'm just grateful for him".

jooyeon hums in agreement, slapping donghyun's shoulder for him ever asking such a thing. "that's right, you should probably get him a token of appreciation or something".

jisung blinks, trying to imagine what he should ever gift you. he truly has no idea, he's not sure if he should go over and beyond, or just give you a little gift as to not intimidate you. "i can't really think of anything, i don't want to overwhelm him or something, he just wanted to do a nice thing.."

"i'm sure he'll be appreciative of anything!"

at the words, jisung just sighs, smiling.

what a hero, l/n y/n— you really are something, he thinks.

"yeah— i'll think about it".

"good! back to practice now!"

jisung doesn't think he will ever fully be able to focus on practice, though.

"YOU LOOK LIKE YOU'VE BEEN RAN OVER BY A TRAIN" the words from the older boy, yang jeongin, snap you out of your polaroid staring daze. you flinch just the slightest, eyes peeling away from the scattering pictures which litter your desk. you rub your eyes, clearing your throat as you quickly gather all of the photos on your desk, hoping the eye bags present on your face weren't completely obvious. knowing jeongin though, they were definitely obvious. "thanks for the kind words" you respond sarcastically, a small eye roll accompanying your words. the older boy snickers, situating himself beside you, a teasing smile on his face. he props his legs up, blinking at you. "seriously though, you look like you haven't slept in years, are you alright?"

"i'm as alright as someone looking to pursue journalism can be.." you mutter back, placing the photos which were previously on your desk into your backup, a small sigh escapes your lips. "all of my applications are still pending.."

"seriously? i assume you would've been accepted into any of those schools by now!"

"you know how it all goes, they get hundreds— heck, thousands of applications every day, i just have to be patient".

jeongin raises an eyebrow, then just shrugs at you, humming. "there's no need to worry, y/n, you'll get into a good school".

you chuckle at his words, he totally read your mind when it came to that. "i'm not worried about anything" you lie; "i'll be okay, i know".

but do you?

your absolutely tired the whole entire day, you tried your best to focus in your classes, but you couldn't help your head slipping down and the way you almost slipped off to dreamland whilst your teachers were asking you very much audible questions.

"did you sleep last night?" sungchan asks you in the middle of your afternoon break, poking your arm as if to wake up. "you look like a zombie.."

"i slept a few.. hours?" your tone is very much a questioning one, as if you didn't even believe your own words. "i don't know, i was too busy fighting with lin, apparently i'm not good enough at what i do to consider journalism".

paired with the lack of response to your several applications, you weren't having the best week, it was all becoming just a little too much for you.

graduation is just too far away..

"anyway! did you choose the photos you'll put in the editorial yet?"

you think, for a while. you felt as if you had stared at so many polaroids by this point, that they're probably going to start appearing in your dreams, with the lack of sleep, constant flashing of cameras and just news news news, you've really had no time to focus on other things.

"i haven't even found time to think about the editorial" you whine, a weary sigh escaping your lips as you think about how pissed off your higher up is gonna be if you almost miss the deadline once again. "is the deadline coming up?"

"well— is four days a close deadline for you?"

you gasp, loudly, almost throwing your camera across the hallway. "four days!? four days until the deadline seriously!?"

you usually aren't like this. you are usually very calm, cool, and collected, but your week has been just the definition of a shit storm, and everything just seems getting worse and worse.

"hey, it's okay!" sungchan immediately replies, hoping to reassure you. he places a hand on your shoulder, a smile coming to his face. "it's not like this is anything new, it'll all be fine, you only have to choose two pictures anyway".

you sigh, rubbing your temples. "yeah" you breath. "it'll be fine, fine" you repeat, nodding your head as you relax yourself.

the hallway is crowded, not crowded crowded, but crowded enough that you couldn't help but begin counting the heads around you.

your eyes get stuck on a familiar figure across the hall.

park jisung, smiling and laughing with his friends. you get lost in a trance of admiring him, even though you can clearly hear sungchan talking to you. all your attention is immediately on him, and a small smile spreads across your face as you observe him, being himself.

there is absolutely no reason for him to be so breathtaking while just talking with his friend!

you are so distracted, and you don't mean to get stuck in this little reverie as you stare at the boy that you totally do not have a crush on.

he hasn't really left your mind, instead of just floating around in there like he'd been before that whole prior incident, now he occupies a whole subsection of your mind in recent days. you could be with your other friends, and all of a sudden your mind would wander off to jisung, or you could be in class and he just pops into your head.

you never thought you'd be one to get distracted easily, but you've clearly been proven wrong by just the alluring aura of park jisung.

you startle when jisung turns your way, making eye contact with you. he smiles upon noticing you, his eyes practically lighting up, and he waves at you. your a little taken aback, but jisung doesn't wait to see you wave back, just turning back towards his friend and continuing his previous conversation.

"what was that?"

"what was what?"

you quickly look over at sungchan, who had just witnessed that whole entire scene. he looks at you like you just grew a second head, and your face begins to burn as the realization dawns on you.

"you and park jisung!?"

your quick to try and sputter out a response, but you shake your head, face excessively heating up, it's probably red at this very moment. "there is nothing going on between us!"

"that doesn't seem like nothing!"

you realize how guilty you look right now. with your red face and constant insistence that there is absolutely nothing going on, those are traits the guiltiest of people display, and it all just makes you look even more guilty with how your face gets even more red.

(you must look like you're dying right now).

"it's just a friendly exchange!"

"not while your looking at him with hearts in your eyes!"

he was completely calling you out, and he was right. you were staring at jisung like he was an angel that had graced your presence, you stare at him like he's a saint and everyone else doesn't matter, as if he's the only person in the room. "i— i wasn't! i was just zoned out and he just waved at me to say hi!"

sungchan narrows his eyes suspiciously at you, totally not buying it. "uh huh, sure" his voice conveys disbelief. "just know, i'm onto you y/n".

you nudge him in the shoulder, seriously wanting to change the topic. "yeah yeah whatever" you cross your arms as you mutter the words, you're sure if you take one more glance at jisung, you won't be able to look away, so you just clear your throat and walk the other way, face still red as sungchan teases you the whole entire time.

maybe if you glanced back, you'd see jisung watching as you left..

JISUNG WAS REALLY HOPING HE'D BE ABLE TO catch you before school dismissed. you two haven't genuinely had an actual talk since you saved him from the flying baton heading straight towards his head. all you two have done is give smiles, waves, and mutter small greetings to each other in the hallway. he had to admit, it upset him in just the slightest, because he really did want to just have a conversation with you (of course, he isn't exactly sure he'd be able to get through a conversation with you without blushing like a madman anyway), but your schedules just kept conflicting, so even catching a glimpse of you around the campus has become difficult for him to do.

he doesn't want to waste any opportunity he has in his hands—

"y/n!"

when jisung sees you across the hall, he realizes that he shouldn't take this chance for granted. you turn around at the call of your name, smiling as you see the others making his way towards you. jisung runs a hand through his hair, hoping he isn't making anything awkward. "jisung hi, do you need something?"

you smile politely at him, a smile so beautiful it seems like it could get rid of all the problems in the world. jisung loves your smile, he could stare at it for hours, is that creepy? he hopes it's not creepy..

"oh uh—" the words he'd been planning to say somehow get caught in his throat, but he clears his throat and proceeds. "i was wondering if i could walk you home?"

you blink, puzzled by the question. why would he want to walk you home? your mind begins to wander, trying to figure out why he'd want to do such a thing.

can't you just ask y/n? stop being an idiot..

"why?"

you don't mean for your words to come out that way, and you're almost afraid that you made jisung uncomfortable with your tone of voice, but he instead just smiles, squashing any of your bad thoughts. you love jisung's smile, you think it's underrated, so little people talk about it and the fact shocks you, you could probably compliment his smile for hours—

but that sounds just a little creepy.

"i just want to accompany you—" —and this is my only excuse to be around you— "do something nice for you after you did something nice for me".

the words make you pause. he's just.. so thoughtful huh? you've never heard of someone wanting to repay you for being nice, it's actually a little strange if you think about it.

"jisung you don't have to reward me for doing something nice.."

"it'd be great to walk with you, though, you make good company".

that's it? that's really it?

you're not sure why you're surprised about that, maybe it's just the idea that he literally searched for you just to say this, he truly just wants to walk you home, he truly just wants to spend time with you.

he thinks i make good company, just the thought alone is enough to make you giggle in your head. your inner thoughts sound ridiculous, but you can't help them.

"if you don't want me to it's totally oka—"

"no no no" you immediately cut into his sentence, hoping that didn't come off as desperate as it sounded. "i'm glad you offered to walk me home, i'd love to walk with you too".

you unsuccessfully try to mutter those last few words, a sudden shyness taking over you. jisung smiles, glad, no, elated at your agreement. he doesn't know why he's that happy, but he hopes it isn't clear and evident, he'd never live it down.

after bidding a goodbye to your friends, and telling sungchan you'd make sure to choose the photos for your editorials, you dragged jisung out of the school doors, much to your and jisung's surprise, as well as the shock of a few of your classmates, he made sure to eye the both of you suspiciously.

"what interested you in photography?"

a scene like this is something jisung thought he'd never get to, being able to talk to you, one on one. just the two of you sharing a simple conversation is what he's wanted for an uncharted amount of time, even with how straightforward it is, the two of you could never really find time to converse normally.

when jisung asks the question, you almost think you heard him wrong. he genuinely wants to know? in a way, you feel like you've always been just the slightest bit boring, yeah you wanna do journalism and love taking aesthetically pleasing photos but you've never considered what you do to be a talent by any means.

you pick at your fingers, looking down at the ground instead of at jisung. "it's an interest i picked up from my mother, i've always been shocked how she could just do that, you know? i love videography and stuff like that as well, i love how one can capture so much with just a single camera".

your words intrigue jisung, and he listened the whole entire way, not interrupting you once. he found a smile crossing his face at the clear display of passion for your creative work, he loves the way you put it into words. god if he didn't admire you before, he surely did now.

"what about you? you're pretty much good at everything, what drew you to the adrenaline rushing excitement of soccer?"

jisung pauses, allowing himself to let out a small snicker at the question. "i don't really enjoy soccer".

you raise an eyebrow. "oh?"

jisung laughs again, your tone of voice amusing him. "don't say it like that.. it's not that i hate it, i'm just not as into it like everyone expects me to be, i got onto the school team and i've been stuck there ever since" there isn't exactly distaste in jisung's tone, he just states it casually, like how it is. his voice is just simple, mundane, he doesn't dislike soccer, it's just not what he's looking forward to do.

you love his honesty.

"i'm into other things in a much more passionate sense, like dance, soccer is just a hobby" he finally finishes, pulling his sleeves over his arms as he avoids eye contact with you.

"so no professional soccer player park jisung?"

"i think i'll leave it to the other guy to be known for that".

you chuckle at his words, okay, he's funny (you knew that already, you just had to reiterate it in your head). god how can a guy be so perfect? you get why people are so into jisung, he's charming even without trying. you feel like the luckiest guy on earth knowing he asked to walk you home.

"y/n, i'm a very.." jisung pauses, as if trying to articulate the words he was about to say. "i really admire you a lot".

you almost lose it.

park jisung, beautiful, talented, hardworking park jisung admires you? he is an admirer of yours? you don't even know what to say, you try your best to sputter out a response but your brain is practically malfunctioning. your face goes red, and you go silent for a few minutes.

"i don't get it" is what you say, and jisung just cocks his head towards the side, observing you. "what's so admirable about me?"

"do you want a list?"

oh i'd love that. "i don't think you should waste your time".

"i wouldn't be wasting my time" jisung smiles, his gaze focused on you and only you, there's a way he's looking at you that keeps you still, unable to look away from him. "i never get the chance to tell you, i'd love to talk about everything i admire about you".

when did jisung get so bold? he'll never know where this random confidence came from, but he has an opportunity, he can't let it go to waste. he has to bring it up to you.

"what i do is nothing incredible—"

"i would disagree".

you should be angry that jisung interrupted you, but you found yourself smiling at his words. he's so generous, he doesn't have to tell you this, he doesn't have to compliment you like this, but he's doing it on his own accord, he wants to.

"okay then.. is it a good time to tell you that i also feel the same?"

jisung's ears go red, so red that it looks like smoke is gonna start pouring out of them. he is shocked, absolutely speechless. you admire him? does that mean he's gotten it all wrong these past few years? does that mean you return his feelings as well—

wait what?

"oh really?"

the prior confidence jisung had when telling you about his admiration has now all fizzled away, his voice almost cracks as he tries to register your words, and thank god it doesn't.

"it's kind of like what you said, you're amazing, a very admirable person, i know you don't really think of yourself like that but i do, and it's nice to be able to tell you up front".

jisung remains silent, but you don't mind, you just give him a smile and continue walking forward, allowing for him to catch up to you.

"is that actually true?"

"why would i lie to you?" you turn around, your whole body facing him. you begin walking backwards and wait for jisung's reply to your question. "don't give me that look".

jisung frowns, a playful one, he sends you a cute little glare that makes you giggle. he's absolutely adorable, you think in your head, he's the cutest person ever right now.

"you admire me?"

"yep".

"more than i admire you?"

"definitely, and don't even try to argue with me".

jisung opens his mouth to do exactly that, but you stop, turning around as you make it to the front of your house. "okay well, thank you for walking me home, ji".

jisung raises an eyebrow, noting down the nickname in his head. it's a common nickname, but he loves the way it sounds coming from you, he loves that you didn't just drop his full name.

"it's no problem.."

"i—"

you're cut off by the sound of the door opening, and your met with the face of your mother, whose face immediately brightens at the sight of you. you smile at her, and jisung just kinda stands there awkwardly.

"hi honey" she wraps her arms around you, and you let her, leaning your head onto her shoulder. "i thought you were staying late today?"

you shake your head. "not today, it's friday remember?"

"ohhh, yeah".

jisung glances down at the ground, playing with his feet. he doesn't know what to say, he doesn't want to interrupt the conversation you're having with your mother—

but he doesn't have to say anything, because your mother pipes up.

"oh! and who might this be?" she narrows her eyes at jisung, cogs in her brain seem to turn but then she snaps his fingers and gasps, seemingly getting it. "oh my god! park jisung?"

jisung smiles, a little laugh escaping his lips. "that is me".

"holy, you've changed so much? the last time i saw you you were barely up to my knees!"

at the sound of your mothers words, you give jisung a teasing stare, one which he quickly turns away from. "you and y/n are finally friends? i was wondering when it'd happen.."

your face goes bright red at the words, and an awkward chuckle escapes your lips. "seems he was too, he always talked about it—"

"haha! what!? that's hilarious mom!" you quickly cut in, not wanting her to talk about your former ramblings about park jisung, park jisung who was right beside you. "yeah okay, jisung i'll see you monday?"

jisung nods, a little too desperately for his liking, luckily you don't notice. "yeah, monday, have a good weekend, y/n".

you smile, blood rushing through your cheeks. "be safe".

he gives a small wave and turns around, beginning the walk back towards his home.

"he's such a nice kid, you sure you're just friends?"

your jaw pretty much drops, and you give your mother a look you don't think you've ever shared with her before. "yes! just friends!"

"hmm, sure".

"WHO ARE THOSE FOR?" CHENLE asks as he immediately notices the goodies in jisung's hands. he raises an eyebrow suspiciously at his best friend, examining the bouquet of flowers and box jisung held. jisung ignores him for a couple of minutes, placing the box in his locker and closing it behind him. "for someone" he just replies, hoping he could just remain vague instead of telling chenle about his true plans. the older narrows his eyes, clearly curious about this 'someone'. he flicks jisung in the forehead, resulting in a yelp from the other, who glares. "ow! what was that for?" he asks, furrowing his eyebrows and rubbing his forehead, a frown now coming to his face.

"what you're hiding stuff from me now?" chenle rolls his eyes at jisung's frown. "who are those flowers for? you got a boyfriend or something?"

chenle was right in assuming it was a boy that was making him go crazy, but you aren't his boyfriend (not yet at least, he's trying, really). he doesn't want to exactly divulge his plans to his nosy best friend yet, just because he'd go around telling everybody he could about what jisung was doing, he didn't want anything to be spoiled.

"they're for.. y/n".

jisung winces the moment he says those words, because chenle goes absolutely crazy.

"FOR WHO!?"

jisung is quick to slap a hand over chenle's mouth, glaring at him for how loud he said those words. "could you be any more obvious?" he asks, gritting his teeth as he continues to glare at his shorter best friend, whose eyes just widen even more. "yes they're for y/n—"

"what are you two dating now?" chenle doesn't care about anything jisung has to say, he slaps his hand away and stares in interest, wanting to know more.

"no! were not dating! it's just—" jisung pauses, how is he even gonna explain this without looking super guilty? blood rushes through his cheeks as he thinks about it, about how these are your favorite flowers, about how you might react. "i wanted to get him something nice! he did a good thing and.."

and i am just so in love with him, i think i might be going insane.

"i just want to do something nice!"

"okay but are you doing something nice or are you getting ready to ask him out?"

jisung's face goes a dangerously red color, and he immediately shakes his head, denial coursing through his veins. "i'm not going to ask him out, i mean— i get why you think that but it's not what it looks like!"

chenle raises an eyebrow, staring at his totally lovestruck best friend. "it sure does seem to be what it looks like".

"chenle—"

"look, jisung, there's no need to deny that you have such an obvious crush on y/n" chenle states like it's a matter of a fact, because it is, they both know it very well, he's better at assessing jisung's feelings than jisung himself is. "he thinks your cute, you think he's cute, you two just need to ask each other out".

"um.." jisung presses his lips together, the two falling into a weird silence. he clutches the daisies in his hands, thinking about you, but he shuts off his thoughts to respond to chenle's little analysis of him.

"i just don't know where we stand, i mean we're barely even friends".

"you two are pretty much already more than friends considering he can't talk to you without looking like he's about to devour you whole".

jisung's face must be an astonishing shade of red right now. "it's not—! i don't know how to explain it okay!?"

"yeah and how are you gonna explain the flowers?" chenle points at the daisies jisung is practically squeezing to death. "other people are probably gonna get another idea".

"well i'll let them think what they want" jisung responds, his only focus is you, who cares what other people think? your his main priority. "y/n is my main focus, i don't care about what other people are saying".

chenle chuckles at his response, oh park jisung is so down bad, he's so in love with you, a kind of love chenle has never seen him have for another person. yes park jisung, love avoiding extraordinaire, is head over heels in love with a boy, chenle cannot believe it.

"okay jisung, go ahead with your wooing y/n mission or something".

at least chenle is supportive.

jisung has to go through so many interrogations to explain to your fellow photographers why he's giving you flowers, while a few of them just shrug and get it, the rest of them make sure to eye him suspiciously while he goes on with his explanation and bright red ears.

he knows most of them probably won't keep their mouths shut, and jisung knows that you told him he shouldn't get you anything for preventing him from getting any future brain damage, but jisung disagrees, he thinks you deserve gifts.

"who are those for?"

your brain doesn't register the flowers, or the connection that they have with your not-so-secret admirer, you just stare at them puzzled. "they're for you!" sohee yells from somewhere else in the room, focused on another important thing.

your eyebrows furrow, and you blink as you stare at the daisies on the table. daisies are your favorite flowers, but everyone knows that! these could be from anyone! you're no stranger to getting random gifts from people, so these could really be from anyone.

but you only have a certain person in mind..

"from who?" you ask, but you really already know who, considering the knowing look sohee sends to you.

"jisung".

of course, you say in your head, your fingers trace the packaging of the bouquet, admiring the pretty flowers before you (the pretty flowers given to you by a pretty boy), a small smile comes to your face as you think about it. you told jisung not to get you anything, but he obviously wasn't going to listen to you, he's made that very clear.

"did he tell you anything?"

sohee doesn't spare you another glance, but you can just tell he's grinning like a madman with the way he's clearly trying to hold in his laughter. "he just told me to make sure to get them to you, he was very insistent".

the teasing tone of your friends voice doesn't go unnoticed by you, and your barely able to stifle your laugh, not at sohee exactly, but at jisung's actions.

of course he didn't listen when you said for him to not get you anything, he remembered what your favorite flowers are, did he spend his weekend thinking about it? you wonder what kind of florists we must've went to.. your mind races with just jisung thoughts, and you're just so lost in them that you don't realize your zoning out.

oh park jisung, why do you have to be so sweet?

"DID YOU REALLY HAVE TO?" YOU immediately ask the moment you come across park jisung in the hallway. the boy blinks, smiling at the sight of you, his face practically brightens at the sight of you. "what do you mean?" he inquired innocently, a small tilt of his head adding to his question. you send him a glare, not a serious one, but it's still a glare. you can't even believe his audacity, for him to look at you with such beautiful eyes, make your knees feel weak without even having to do anything? park jisung is just such a crazy man, you don't know if you can stare at him any longer, you might end up passing out from heat exhaustion (the heat from your face, of course, something that's become so normal for you when around park jisung).

"don't 'what do you mean?' me, i told you not to get me anything!" you complain, lightly shoving jisung's shoulder. "seriously, i said it was fine.." you mumble those words, but jisung just smiles.

"i wanted to get you something anyway, i needed to show you my appreciation somehow".

but just your admiration is enough appreciation for me, just you being around is enough, just you is enough.

your own thoughts weird you out on occasions.

"i told you not to—"

"but i wanted to, it's fine y/n, seriously, just accept my gesture".

you bite your inner cheek, he just always has to be nice, doesn't he? your cheeks flare up and you swear your face goes a shade of red you've never seen before, how does one boy even affect you like this? you don't think you've ever acted like this around any of your other admirers ever..

"ah" a small smile comes to your face. "thank you" you whisper, you're not sure why you get so shy all of a sudden.

"it's no problem" jisung responds, a smile coming to his face. he closes the door to his locker, and then leans onto it. "walk with me?"

you blink, jisung really likes walking with you, huh? is this gonna become your thing? you wouldn't really mind when you think about it.. you enjoy walking with jisung, you just enjoy any time you can spend with jisung.

"what's with you and asking to walk with me?"

"walking with you is just.. nice".

"do i ease your stresses or something?"

your tone is meant to come off as teasing, and your question is mostly unserious, you don't register how you sound like your flirting with jisung, probably because everything just feels so natural with jisung, you love how you feel around him, it's confusing to explain.

"i guess you could say that" jisung's response snaps you out of your jisung focused thoughts, thoughts which are difficult to not get stuck in considering park jisung is constantly occupying your mind these days. "anyway, can you walk with me?"

you pause, tongue pressing against the inside of your cheek. you have class in twenty minutes, and you don't really want to walk back all the way with only five minutes left to make it to class. "i don't know.. chen might kill me".

"please?"

that catches you off guard, you seemingly forget how to think for a second. jisung really wants to walk with you so bad, he's reverting to that easily convincing voice of his? you'd be an idiot to say no, you'd be an idiot to deny anything given to you by park jisung, you sigh in your head.

"okay, fine".

a smile of victory places itself on jisung's face, and he takes your hand, to your own surprise, as the two of you begin making your way down the hall. you wanna bring it up, but you don't want him to let go of you, so you don't. your face goes a bright shade of red, jisung doesn't seem to mind, or maybe he's always wanted to hold your hand, you aren't sure.

you focus way too much on it, on the way it feels, how jisung's soft hands contrast your rough ones, how warm his hands are, you don't want to let go, you don't want him to let go. god, you feel like such a loser, freaking out over a boy holding your hand.

but it's not just a boy, it's park jisung, park jisung makes you feel things you thought you'd never feel before..

"why do you seem so worried?" jisung chuckles, his hand holding yours. he nudges your shoulder lightly, raising an eyebrow.

"because, i don't wanna be late".

jisung snickers, not making fun of you, though, he hopes you don't think that. "have you never skipped a class before?"

your eyes widen as large as saucers, model student park jisung has skipped classes? a small chuckle escaped your lips. "no, i could never bring myself to, it always made me feel strange.."

now it's jisung's turn to look surprised, you laugh again, why does he assume you skip classes? or have even attempted to skip? you wonder what goes through his mind. "are you serious? you've never tried to skip before?"

you scoff, pinching his arm. "i tried to once in the sixth grade because of a dare from friends, but i literally couldn't do it, they called me a wimp for the rest of the year".

"aww sad".

"don't give me your fake pity, also— you've skipped class before!?"

jisung chuckles at your surprise, giving a small smile. "it was a few times as a sophomore, some classes are just so boring i can't resist".

"wow, model student park jisung skips his classes? i cannot believe the information that has been bestowed upon me".

the words, paired with your sarcastic tone made jisung let out yet another snicker, he hopes he's not overdoing it in your eyes, you're genuinely just a very funny person. "oh no! don't use this secret to tarnish my pristine reputation!"

"you're such an idiot".

a cute idiot.

"be quiet, you still love me" jisung rebuts, adding a small nudge to your shoulder along with his words.

it's weird to say, but you like this. even with your totally non-romantic feelings for jisung, you find this nice. is this what dating him would be like? you get to hold hands and joke around in the halls without a care in the world? you think you'd enjoy that, you'd enjoy dating park jisung.

wait what?

you snap out of your thoughts when jisung stops, so you stop too. he lets go of your hand, and you resist the urge to frown, because you don't want to come off as desperate. (but you are desperate, you're so desperate, having park jisung hold your hand was so nice, you want him to hold it again).

"this is my stop, thank you for my walking with me".

the words are simple, basic, but you find your face heating up at them anyway. you clear your throat, not wanting to stay silent any longer. "it was no problem, i couldn't disagree anyway".

jisung laughs, he is so pretty, so pretty without even having to do anything significant. "of course you couldn't" he looks down at his feet. "anyway! have a good day y/n, don't be late to your next class!"

you blink as you watch jisung walk into the auditorium for his next class, you watch as he walks away, standing there for what seems like forever. how could a guy, just a guy affect you so much? what is it with park jisung and making you stop in your tracks? he's mesmerizing, just so easily draws you in.

your eyes widen as you realize the time, you're going to be late for your next class, mr. chen is going to kill you!

and as you totally sprint down the hallway to get to your next class, your mind is racing with thoughts of park jisung the entire time.

"AM I NOT YOUR BEST FRIEND?" YOU CAN practically hear the pout in sungchan's voice as he said those words. you place the extra polaroids on your desk, then glance up at your friend, who stares at you with an expression of defeat on his face. you raise an eyebrow, puzzled at what the actual hell he's talking about, he's always just bringing stuff up so randomly, you can't even keep up with what he's referring to now. sungchan just frowns, letting out a groan of frustration as plops down beside you, a small huff adding to his words. you chuckle at the way he decides to present himself, and he groans once again, very frustrated. "where is this coming from?"

"why didn't you tell me about you and jisung".

you pause, an expression of surprise comes to your face, your face which heats up astonishingly quickly. "me and jisung? me and jisung what? we aren't—"

"y/n there's no point in denying it, everyone already knows".

"everyone already knows what?"

"that you and jisung have a thing, it's fine if you don't wanna tell everyone but excluding me? your best friend in the whole entire world from the news?"

"jisung and i aren't dating!" you say immediately, clasping your hands together as you try to calm your rapidly beating heart. why do people even think that? yeah you like park jisung but how did people even reach the conclusion that you were dating? you're not even sure if jisung returns your feelings. "i don't even know where people got that idea.."

"so your constant yearning stares and pitched up giggles are all not apart of that?"

"i don't—" you are definitely showcasing all guilty characteristics, your red face, your shrill voice, and your very obvious lying, sungchan sees right through you, anyone would be able to. "yearning stares are stupid i don't do that!"

"yeah, sure y/n" sungchan sighs, and you groan, screaming into your pillow. "i'm not trying to be mean or anything, but it's disgustingly obvious that you're into jisung, and i mean in a cringy way".

you gasp in offense, turning away from your best friend. you want to remain stubborn, but you can't, of course you can't, how can you even deny your feelings for jisung anymore if other people can now tell that you like him? your face heats up in embarrassment, and you cover your face with your hands. "is it really that obvious?" you mutter, hoping the answer isn't what you think it is.

"yeah, very, i wouldn't even be surprised if the two of you were actually dating and this was a little trick of yours".

sungchan points at you, an accusatory look in his eyes, but he immediately lets it go, because he knows you, and he can tell that you are telling the truth. you don't even have the courage to look at him, still covering your face with your hands. "have you not told jisung how you feel yet?"

your silence tells sungchan everything he needs to know, and the look he gives you is absolutely criminal.

"YOU HAVEN'T!?"

"i haven't found any time too!"

"how much time have you been spending around jisung these days!? you haven't even tried to bring it up to him!"

you let yourself fall to the side, half your body hanging off your bed. "i don't know how to" you whine, mind immediately rushing to thoughts of park jisung, thoughts you probably shouldn't be having. "it's awkward!"

"well i'm sure jisung feels the same with the way he always has to resist the urge to kiss you in the hallway".

"with the way he WHAT!?"

the words are enough to make you rise from your formerly fallen state, a look of astonishment on your face. did jisung really return your feelings? or was sungchan just trying to start something that would end up absolute humiliation?

"y/n, not trying to be rude or anything, but it's so obvious that jisung wants to date you, he doesn't even have to say it for everyone to know!"

you feel like you just discovered the secrets of the universe with those words, park jisung likes you? like likes you likes you? once the realization dawns on you, you gasp loudly.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME!? OH MY GOD I CAN'T BELIEVE I WAS SUCH AN IDIOT UGH!"

sungchan watches you freak out, he truly can't believe that he had to tell you for all of it to finally set in.

it's actually pretty funny, and he snickers as he watches you go absolutely ballistic.

"HAVE YOU SEEN Y/N?" JISUNG ASKS the first recognizable person he sees in the hallway. he hasn't seen any seniors anywhere for a while, but that's because the days keep getting warmer, meaning graduation keeps getting closer, most of the seniors only take two classes and then go on to do their extracurriculars, so they don't really have to spend the whole entire day at school, but it's weird today because he usually always sees you, even when he isn't purposefully looking for you (which has become a common thing for him to do, he's just loves the time he can spend with you). he hopes you aren't absent, because today is friday, and if he doesn't tell you his important news now he's going have to wait an extra two days.

"y/n? uh..." the unfamiliar boy pauses for a moment, as if thinking, and jisung is hoping that it isn't the worst, because he really needs you to be here today. "well i'm not sure where he is actually! probably with his other photographers".

"but he's here right?" jisung doesn't care if he comes off as desperate, his only focus is you, you are his main priority, he doesn't care about the impression he's making on others, he can truly only think about you at the moment.

"yeah! i'm just not sure where exactly!"

"okay thank you!"

the guy gives him a strange look, a mix of teasing and giddy, but jisung walks off too fast to see it, he's set on finding you. he doesn't exactly know where he's supposed to go, he's just hoping to somehow spot you and be able to get you alone.

"what are you rushing for?" chenle comes out of nowhere, noticing jisung's urgency and the way he's clearly focused on something specific strikes him as odd, but he already has an idea of what's making jisung so fidgety. "you're gonna confess your love to y/n or something?"

"yes, actually i am chenle, it'd be great if i could find him, though".

maybe it's jisung's surprising honesty, or the way his main priority is you. chenle finds it amusing how quick the switch flipped, but it's also kind of cute. the usual pessimist, mr 'i don't really care about love' park jisung is down bad for a boy, it's adorable. "have you tried the photography room?"

"where do you think i'm heading?"

chenle chuckles at jisung's attitude, simply smiling and pulling his cheek. "alright then! don't forget to tell me how it goes!"

jisung doesn't spare chenle another glance, just turns back around and focuses on the task at hand, finding you and telling you how he feels.

jisung wonders how you'll react, based on what he's seen, it's not completely guaranteed that you'll reject him, it's probably more likely that you return his feelings rather than don't. does that make him horrible? thinking because you've exhibited the traits of someone who has a crush that you have a crush on him?

maybe you don't like him and he's letting it all get to his head, it all just seems too good to be true.

jisung doesn't even have to go all the way to the photography room, because he bumps right into you whilst on his way there, and a small yelp escapes your lips. "oh my god.. sorry!"

jisung cannot contain his excitement, and his nervousness. there is absolutely nothing to be nervous about, this is y/n. kind, understanding, charming y/n, it's not like he's going to scream at you for telling him you like him. it’ll all be fine.

"it's alright" you whisper, shaking your head for a moment. "i was looking for you" you immediately say, not allowing for jisung to speak before you.

jisung's eyes widen. you were looking for him? it makes his brain go haywire, figurative cogs in his head turning. "that's ironic, i was looking for you too".

jisung swears he can see the red coloring on your cheeks, but he doesn't say anything about it.

"i have to tell you something".

the two of you say that sentence in unison, the same amount of anxiety coursing through your veins, the same red hue on your cheeks, the same look of surprise in your eyes. "you can go first" you whisper, picking at your fingers, you aren't exactly sure if you want to hear what he's about to say.

"are you sure? it seems you have something more important to say.."

"it's fine! really, i can just say it after yo—"

"i'm in love with you".

the words strike you like a punch to the gut, a slap to the face. your stomach drops, your face is burning horribly, and your legs feel like they're about to give in. you cannot believe it, you hope you don't pass out, you hope you don't just die right here, that'd be so embarrassing.

park jisung is in love with you. beautiful, talented, model student park jisung who you've never truly known how you felt about is in love with you. you are so happy, giddy, and it disgusts you, but the disgust is quickly replaced by the feeling of joyousness. park jisung is in love with you, he feels the same way.

"jisung, i'm—"

"it's okay if you don't return my feelings i just wanted to tell you!" is that really what he thinks? that you don't love him back? he must be crazy, you've only ever exhibited reciprocal feelings. "i'll be off now!"

"no! don't go!" you grab jisung's wrist before he can walk away. smart move y/n, you're acting so natural right now. "i just, i return your feelings! i just don't know how to explain it, also my hands are very sweaty right now and i feel gross.."

you let go of jisung's wrist and feel your face get unbearably hotter. it's embarrassing, you feel so embarrassed, but it's park jisung, and jisung just stares at you lovingly. you're so cute, how did it take him this long to tell you how he felt?

"you're so cute".

jisung doesn’t even realize he says the words until you give him that look, and your red face just makes him giggle more. "this isn't— that is not fair! i was supposed to confess first!"

"you're the one who told me to go first!"

"i didn't know you were going to tell me you liked me! i prepared a whole sentence for you and everything!"

you whine, covering your red face with your hands. jisung removes your hands from your face, and a small smile graces his pretty features. he's absolutely gorgeous, he has such a pretty smile, you have the sudden urge to tell him about it. "your smile is beautiful".

now it's jisung's turn to become the red faced lovesick fool. "ah, really?" he responds, voice shaky, hands even more shaky, but they're so soft, your mind always reminds you to note that.

you hum in agreement. "it's very pretty, i can't believe more people don't talk about it".

"well you can talk about it, aren't we technically dating now?"

the question makes you pause. you feel like your about to go insane, you're dating park jisung? park jisung is your boyfriend? this is like a dream come true, a dream you thought would stay a dream and only a dream. "dating? dating! yeah yeah!"

your natural act is not natural at all, you are very nervous, so nervous you feel like your about to collapse onto the floor. "there's no need to be so nervous.."

you groan. "says you!"

"alright y/n" jisung lets go of your hands, much to your dismay, because you frown. he takes note, and reaches over to grab your own once again, intertwining your fingers. "we’re dating, you don't have to go red faced every time i compliment you now".

"but it's you, how do i not?"

jisung sighs, leaning forward and pressing a small peck on your lips. oh he is such a stupid little—

"why would you do that!?"

"i'm sorry!" jisung giggles, he was definitely not sorry. "it was an instinct, i had to!"

"you— ugh!"

park jisung can't just not make you nervous, he's such a crazy man.

one that you love, of course.

"I THINK I LIKE THIS ONE THE MOST.." JISUNG states, admiring the polaroid photos which litter the desk. you hum at his words, rummaging through the box on the counter, you are very much focused on finding that estranged camera taehyun had pointed for you to find. your boyfriend glances up, looking over your shoulder, silently watching as you get frustrated about this stupid camera you couldn't find. "which one?" you inquire, glancing over at him. jisung holds up the polaroid, a picture you'd taken of you and sungchan at the beach when you were nine. a pretty photo, you aren't even sure how you pulled it off. "ah, that is a pretty one" you whisper, and you smile the moment jisung smiles. his smile is so pretty, a cute stretch which is enough to make you smile, even if you feel down.

"what’s with your face?"

"searching for this old camera is pissing me off" you remark, knowing that you have to search for this is just making you even more mad, why do you have to pack the photography room right before graduation? you hate it. "who even left it in here?"

"a former student maybe?"

you close your eyes, sighing. "i need this to be over so much more quickly" you complain, and jisung just laughs at your misery.

"we graduate in a week, y/n, just be patient" the younger pokes your cheek, then he cups your face, trying to make your frown disappear. "an old camera is not the end of the world".

you glance down at jisung's lips, then narrow your eyes. "are you trying to seduce me?" you question, raising an eyebrow.

"no?" jisung responds, adding a small tilt of his head to his words. "do i sound believable?"

"not at all" you say, pushing jisung's hands away and looking back to the box in front of you so you can continue to scour for this camera you have to get for your friend. you continue to search through the box, trying to find this old dslr camera for your friend. "so don't distract me".

"i'm not!" jisung whines, wrapping his arms around your waist and placing his chin onto your shoulder, watching you try to succeed at your mission of finding a camera. "you don't want to give me, your lovely, amazing boyfriend attention?"

you merely roll your eyes at jisung, he's so annoying (in a cute way), you're about to call chenle to drag him away from you, but you also don't want him to let go of you, his arms around your waist make you feel safe, loved, park jisung makes you feel so loved.

"i found it!" you shriek, victory soaring in your voice. "fucking finally".

"okay so can you give me a kiss now?" jisung asks, puckering his lips and leaning closer to you.

he's so desperate, and you are too, it's adorable, park jisung is adorable. "hmm" you pretend to think about it, an inquisitive look making it's way to your face. "nah".

"y/n! that's not fair!" jisung whines, shaking you with his arms that are still around your waist. he frowns, trying to give you his best puppy dog eyes.

you almost give in, but you push him away, taking the camera you'd been searching for. "later, babe".

"you said that this morning!"

you sigh, turning around to stare at the pouting park. the cute pout remains on his face, how can you ever resist him? you lean forward and press a kiss to his lips, ruffling his hair. "there, are you happy you big baby?"

"you could do better".

"uh huh, and you could be patient".

jisung frowns once again, but it's not a serious one, just the cute one he likes to do when he pretends to be mad at you. "don't be mad, you know i love you".

jisung does know, he knows that very well. he smiles at you, he's so in love with you, and not even in an embarrassing way, there's nothing embarrassing about this, he feels joyful, a sense of euphoria overtakes him whenever he’s with you.

"i know, i love you too".

and he isn't lying when he says that.

because he truly does.

#park jisung #nct #nct dream #nct imagines #nct scenarios #nct drabbles #nct dream imagines #nct dream scenarios #nct dream drabbles #nct x reader #nct x male reader #nct dream x reader #nct dream x male reader #park jisung imagines #park jisung x reader #park jisung x male reader #𑁍 ࣪˖ 𓂃 isa's works!

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grapefives · 1 year

Text

STARRY EYED | HC

senku x gn!reader

astronomy + friends to lovers + reader is a good drawer + light fluff + author knows jack about astronomy + two nerds in a room they might…

he finds you wide awake, staring at the sky.

even more amusing; you have a journal and pencil in your hands, soft mumbles of spoken thoughts emitting from you.

“night watching to a whole different level, hm?” senku finds himself teasing as he climbs up to the roof to join you.

he’s rarely ever talked to you really, probably only to bark out orders and explain in full, head spinning directions.

“i guess,” you say awkwardly as you close your journal, a but shy now that someone is up here with you.

senku eyes the journal before eyeing you. he won’t press. instead he turns to look at the sky.

“what do you see?” he asks.

“the moon,” you say bitterly.

he snorts, “aside from it.”

your ears turn read but your face remains dull, “and stars.”

“hmmm,” he looks at the sky once more.

you find the courage to ask him, “and you?”

and as expected, he starts to list off all the things he sees. planets, the names of each star he assumes has exploded into nothingness while they were stuck in stone and a bunch of things you wished you comprehended.

“wow,” you mumble. “makes me wish i actually learned back then”.

“this is just basic knowledge,” senku says blandly.

he sees you frown. he feels a tad bad now.

“i can teach you if you want, there’s still lots i need to relearn since things aren’t the way they were anymore.”

“you sure?” you ask, looking at him with a tiny hint of excitement.

an excitement he knows very well, and as soon as the thought of how cute you looked like that, is just as soon as he suppresses it.

“you sleepy?” he asks, unsure how you’re currently feeling.

“nope, why do you think i’m out here?”

senku feels a smile crawl up his face, but his lips only twitch. “come on, let’s go.”

and he takes you to the observatory, the place you’ve been far too hesitant to ask permission to enter in.

and senku was a lot gentle with his explaining and ranting. above everything, he first made sure you were comfortable with jotting things down and asking random questions that were needed for your knowledge.

seeing you grin at your own discoveries and having someone to fawn over space with made senku feel quite warm.

observing and analyzing space became a thing between you too.

anything else went with chrome and gen and taiju. or anyone else really.

but he found himself enjoying having you for that specifically.

and when he saw how much you enjoyed it as well, his feelings started to shift.

late night talks. late night peace.

it was almost…. intimate. almost like, if anyone else came in, they’d disrupt the vibe and he’d probably feel irritated.

“and that’s it, i’m beat,” you huff happily but filled with exhaustion.

senku grabs your journal, which is already on its last remaining pages, and flips through it. he knew you weren’t guarding it as much anymore.

and he felt more comfortable to grab it now that he learned how easily you dropped your guard around him during these moments.

“nice,” he smiles, proud at how much and how fast you learned.

“off i go,” you say casually, leaving the journal in his hands. “put it in my bag when you’re done.”

“no,” he says with a puff, dropping the journal on the table.

you roll your eyes, smiling at him. “give,” you extend your hand and he stares at it, almost tempted to try pulling you into his embrace.

instead, he puts the journal in your hand like asked.

he watched you intently, finding himself fawning over how cute you look tired.

“good night,” he says as you walk past him to head out.

“night,” you say as you ruffle his hair, making him huff and slap your hand away.

your laugh rings in his ears. and when he feels himself blush, he grows in subtle horror at the realization of what his feelings for you are becoming.

it remains something to himself, locked deep down as the days pass by.

however he soon finds himself unable to fully focus, constantly glancing over at you.

he’s subtle of course, not risking anything.

but darn is it hard to suppress his feelings when you suddenly start to get touchy.

a pat in the shoulder shouldn’t be making him so flustered.

a simple praise shouldn’t make him yearn for something more.

you smiling at taiju a lot more shouldn’t make him jealous.

“i think i’m interested in you,” he blurts out calmly in the depth of the silent room the two of you are once again in.

your pencil stops moving and you visibly tense. your mind falls blank, unable to process the idea you once had to senku’s confession.

it floods your senses.

“what?” you ask, so soft in the room but so loud in both his ears and yours.

“you heard me,” he says, feeling anxious.

you force yourself to look at him, eyes slightly wide. “you… like me? are you sure?” it’s laced with fear and yearn

“i’m sure. why else would i say it?” he says, hoping he doesn’t show his nervousness. but he’s always been good at hiding it.

“you said think though.” you find yourself tease, the nerves giving you some adrenaline and confidence.

“y/n,” he says soft but sternly.

you find yourself grinning, “i think i’m interested in you too.”

but it remains like that. confessions in the air, because the two of you were far too nervous to ask the question.

that is, until gen figures it out and tells senku to stop playing dumb.

so once more, the two of you are in the quiet room. but after the confessions, the two of you had grown a bit… distant.

“i’m not avoiding you,” he finds himself blurting it out again

“mm?” you look up at him, quickly looking away.

“why aren’t we dating?”

you blink. then you laugh, “the simple question hasn’t been thrown. by neither of us.”

“then-“ he takes a deep breath, “let’s date.”

you find yourself frowning. but…. “how romantic,” you tease.

“take it or leave it.”

with another laugh, you take it.

#dr stone #dr stone x reader #senku x reader #senku x you #dr stone senku #anime oneshot #anime headcanons #dr stone headcanons #senku headcanons #senku x y/n #senku imagine #dr stone imagine #anime imagines #senku ishigami #dr stone oneshots #gn reader #uvaverse

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iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia · 4 months

Note

HI ITS ME gvxzggsgjfh ok look this is. i know this is a weird one it is SO specific and so obviously something i should just write myself if i want it👏but👏but👏BUT i decided to shoot my shot when a perfect chance has arisenderised for you to pick and choose from anything you like AND in any form, and to see if this one maybe by any chance just so happens to spark anything fun in u too xD

ssssssssssoooooooooooooooooooooo RANDOM EVENT ROLL D20 mc gets bitten by a werewoof or some other kind of "contagious" monster species (....cant really think of anything else other than vampirs, now that i say it) but WAIT THERES MORE because. what if mc insisted that they dont want any potential existent cures, they just wanna stay monstery >:3 JVDTHGLN who's considering it, who would absolutely go in the "its either me or this" direction, who's enthusiastic🤣 this is silly as hell but in the case it sparks joy id love to hear ur any and all thoughts because this idea has been haunting me for forever lmao honestly the best way ive imagined it is like one of your own selfinsert pieces youve posted before where its just all of them together bickering heeheehee💘💕🩷💞💖

love u have fun!!

The Arcana Drabble: MC transforms into a "monster"

In the spirit of things, I though a long drabble/short oneshot would work best to keep the madness going XD

Asra's getting stuck in their "one focus and one focus only" mode and right now that focus is making sure you're okay. He'll decide how he feels later, which isn't being helped at all because Julian keeps calling on him to help him slow down the process and get you to think about this a little more. However, it's hard to tell what exactly Julian wants your decision to be because in between him trying to get Asra to make you think about it some more, he's having all kinds of medical epiphanies about how your anatomy is adjusting to the new monster form:

"MC, let's think about some more, shall we? I'm sure Asra agrees with me - don't you, Asra? Asr - oh, whats this?! Your finger's joints are rapidly adjusting to accommodate for - I need a pen and paper -"

"Right here, Ilya." It's Portia's dismissive tone as she digs a small notebook and pencil out of her pocket that keeps you grounded. Not for long, though, because she can't wait to see what happens next. "Accommodate for what, anyways? Are you growing another joint?? Are you going to get claws??? Talons???? Show me!"

Between Julian jotting down unintelligible notes while he studies your elbow's range of motion, Portia's excited exclamations, and Asra's attempt at soothing touch as they rub your shoulders and ask how you're feeling, it's a miracle you can notice Muriel's quiet mumble in the background. He's clearly overwhelmed and very concerned that the physically-altering substance in general got to your brain first, making you so seemingly okay with turning into a monster.

"MC, do you remember your name? Do you need to take a nap? You don't have to be okay with this -"

"I believe this may warrant far more than a nap to recover from." Nadia's doing her best to keep Lucio calm, holding him back from tackling you much like she might grasp a leash. You can practically see the headache building behind her eyes. "We have yet to determine what the extent of this transformation is and therefore whether our dear MC is even capable of fully agreeing to the current process. MC, darling, did the source of this transformation give you any indication of what the end result would be?"

You'd try to respond, but Lucio's excited yelling is too noisy to shout over. He's fumbling at the fastenings on his cape, distracted by your ongoing changes, and very annoyed at Nadia's interference.

"Where did it go? I want to see if it can give me powers too - OW! Dammit, Noddy, I'm trying to help here! You're keeping me from finding the monster and getting it to give me cool - I mean, getting it to tell us more about what's happening! Don't you want that? Don't you want to help MC, Noddy?! Let me go -"

It's with a loud RIP and subsequent "that was velvet, you know!" that Lucio finally breaks free and sprints off in the direction of your new monster friend. You can feel yourself slowly settling in to your new form as the process shows signs of slowing and reaching completion.

Nadia's facepalming. Portia's looking at you with eyes shining in wonder. Julian's still trying to nag Asra into reversing this as he takes notes. The magician in question is still ignoring him as they ask you how you feel for the nth time. Muriel's eyeing the nearby closet in hopes of taking a nap and waking up to it all being a dream. Lucio's a distant, spiky golden speck at this point.

Faust is quietly trying to sneak her knife into your hand, for crimes.

#ask arcana brainrot #the arcana #the arcana drabble #the arcana imagine #the arcana fanfic #the arcana game #asra the arcana #julian the arcana #nadia the arcana #muriel the arcana #portia the arcana #lucio the arcana #asra alnazar #julian devorak #nadia satrinava #muriel of the kokhuri #portia devorak #lucio morgasson

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riptidewaters · 1 month

Text

Lover

(Harry Potter x fem! Reader! (NAMED)

Charlotte scribbled random lyrics on the parchment she had gotten, the quite of the library comforted her,

‘Ladies and gentlemen will you please stand?

With every guitar string scar on my hand,

I take this magnetic force of a man to be my,

Lover’

She hummed slightly, making up her own tune, ‘Charlotte!’ Her head shot up, looking at her friend, ‘You coming? We have transfiguration in 10.’ Nodding and getting up hastily, Charlotte gathered her things, not noticing the parchment she had been writing on, had been left behind.

‘Sod off Ron.’ Harry said, declining him having a crush on Ginny, he entered the library and shot a slight smile to the librarian. He walked towards a desk and sat down taking his books and parchment out of his book bag and placing them in front of him, when he noticed a piece of slightly yellowed parchment innocently sitting on the desk, pulling the piece of paper towards him and glanced at the hastily scribbled writing on the paper, smiling and reading the lyrics he jotted down his own, adding the words under the previously written verse,

‘Look in my eyes, They will tell you the truth,

The girl in my story will always be you,

I’d go down with the titanic it’s true,

For you…..Lover’

He smiled to himself, leaving the parchment where he found it, not knowing who the original writer was but feeling a strange connection to them.

---

Charlotte came back to the library later, realizing she’d left her lyrics behind. She was surprised to find someone had added to them, and the new lines felt like they were meant just for her. Her friends, noticing her excitement, started teasing her.

“Looks like you’ve got a secret admirer!” one of them joked.

“Your perfect match, writing love songs for you,” another chimed in.

Blushing, but intrigued, Charlotte decided to add another verse, leaving the parchment on the desk again.

---

The next day, Harry returned to the library, surprised but pleased to find the parchment still there. And now, there was more:

Harry’s heart raced as he added his own lines beneath hers.

Feeling bold, he grabbed another piece of parchment and wrote:

“Are you real, or am I just dreaming? Leave me another verse, and maybe one day we’ll meet. – Your Songmate”

He left the two parchments together on the desk, hoping whoever wrote the first part would respond.

---

Days passed, and Charlotte and Harry continued their secret exchange through the parchment, each adding verses and little notes, never revealing their identities. Charlotte found herself thinking more and more about her mystery songmate, while Harry couldn’t stop wondering who the girl behind the lyrics was. His friends started noticing how lost in thought he’d become.

“Harry, what’s got you smiling like that all the time?” Ron asked, nudging him.

“Yeah, you’ve been really happy lately,” Hermione added, her brow furrowed.

But Harry just shrugged them off, keeping his secret.

---

One day, Harry was walking through the corridor when he spotted a notebook lying on the floor. He picked it up, and when he opened it, his breath caught. The handwriting was the same as the one on the parchment—the same lyrics that had been keeping him up at night.

Just then, Charlotte came hurrying down the hall, eyes wide as she saw him holding her notebook.

“Thank you, Harry,” she said, a little breathless as she took it from him.

He watched her walk away, his mind spinning. Now he knew—his mystery girl, the one he’d been writing songs with, was Charlotte.

---

After that, Harry couldn't help but watch Charlotte a little more closely, noticing the way she hummed to herself, or how her eyes lit up when she was deep in thought. He still hadn’t told her he knew, but there was something comforting about knowing that the girl who had captured his heart through music was right there, within reach.

---

Charlotte’s heart was racing as she walked away from Harry in the hallway. She could feel his eyes on her, and a part of her wanted to turn around, to see if he knew. But she couldn’t. Not yet.

Over the next few days, the song exchanges stopped. Harry couldn’t bring himself to add anything new, not when he already knew the truth. Charlotte noticed the silence, and it started to gnaw at her. Had her mystery songmate lost interest? Or had she been too late to figure out who he was?

She was about to give up when one day, she found another piece of parchment tucked into her Transfiguration book. It wasn’t the usual lyrics they’d been sharing. This one was different.

*Harry's Note:*

“I think it’s time we met.

Tonight by the lake, after everyone’s gone to bed.

If you’re real, if you’re the one I’ve been writing with,

I’ll be there, waiting.

– H”

Charlotte stared at the note, her heart pounding. She knew who “H” was, of course. But did he really know it was her? She folded the parchment and tucked it into her robe, her mind made up. She’d go. She had to know.

---

That night, Charlotte slipped out of the castle, her heart hammering with each step toward the lake. The moon was high, casting a silver glow over the water. She saw him then, standing by the edge, his back to her. Harry.

For a moment, she hesitated, her nerves threatening to get the best of her. But then she remembered the words they’d shared, the connection that had grown between them, and she knew she had to go through with this.

“Harry,” she called out softly.

He turned, and their eyes met. For a second, neither of them moved, the air thick with everything unsaid. Then Harry smiled, that familiar, lopsided grin that made her feel like everything would be okay.

“So it’s you,” he said, stepping closer. “I had a feeling it might be.”

Charlotte let out a shaky laugh. “You’re not disappointed, are you?”

“Disappointed?” Harry shook his head, taking her hands in his. “Not even close. You’re the one I’ve been writing with, the one who’s been in my head, in my heart, all this time.”

“I can’t believe it was you,” Charlotte whispered, feeling the warmth of his hands. “I thought I was just dreaming.”

“Me too,” Harry said, his voice soft. “But this is real. We’re real.”

For a moment, they just stood there, hands intertwined, the night wrapping around them like a blanket. It felt like they were the only two people in the world.

Then, almost without thinking, Charlotte started to sing the last verse of the song they’d been writing together.

And you'll save all your

dirtiest jokes for me

And at every table, I'll save you

a seat, lover (Save you a seat)

Harry smiled, his voice joining hers as they sang the final lines together.

“Can I go where you go?

(Can I go where you go, baby?)

Can we always be this

close forever and ever?

And ah, take me out, and take

me home (Forever and ever)

You're my, my, my, my

Oh, you're my, my, my, my

Darling, you're my, my, my, my lover”

As the last note hung in the air, Harry leaned in, pressing his forehead against hers. “This is just the beginning,” he whispered, his breath warm against her skin.

Charlotte smiled, closing her eyes. “Yeah. It is.”

---

And so, what started as scribbles on a forgotten piece of parchment became something more—a song that brought two hearts together, a story that was only just beginning. For Charlotte and Harry, the song would always be theirs, a reminder of the night they found each other, and the love that had been there all along.

#harry james potter x reader #harry potter #harry potter x reader #harry potter x you #hogwarts au #taylor swift #shawn mendes #lovers #love #hermione granger #ron weasley #imagine #harry potter imagine #oneshot #fluff #cute

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stormyoceans · 2 months

Text

random thoughts and recollections about the jimmysea and pondphuwin fanmeet in rome!!!!!!!!

WARNING. this is just a ridiculous amount of obnoxious ramblings by yours truly with basically no pictures whatsoever because 1) im terrible at taking them, 2) my phone is old and has terrible quality, 3) even when @petrichoraline so kindly offered me her spare phone to take some decent photos and videos i almost yeeted it across the room in the midst of things, so. yeah, just be aware these are a lot of boring words ;;;;;;;;

ANYWAY. let's get into it!!!!!!!

JIMMYSEA PHOTO SESSION

putting the jimmysea photo session LITERALLY FIRST THING FIRST sure was a choice and not a good one for my heart which clearly shows in my picture with them because i look like a deer caught in headlights (im not subjecting y'all to my face but trust me on this i was SHAKING)

with the way the queue and the room were set up i feel like it was so much easier to look at and make eye contact with sea rather than jimmy, so at the end i whipped around to thank jimmy too and i think i automatically tried to wai to both of them, which i hope wasn't inappropriate ;;;;;;;;;; in my defense everything that was going on in my head in that moment was FUCK FUCK FUCK THEY'RE ACTUALLY REAL AND SO HANDSOME FUCK

also i had no pose in mind and i ended up panicking ;;;;;;;;

(more ramblings under the cut)

PONDPHUWIN Q&A PANEL

i bought the cheapest pass for them at the last second so i was sitting very far in the back during their panel and yet i could still see pond's jawline from all the way over there like i swear that shit is so sharp it could cut glass

i keep forgetting just how young phuwin actually is because he both looks and sounds so mature and confident and suave it's honestly insane

although one of the games was like. one of them had to be blindfolded and try to guess which pose the other was making just by touching them, and at the very beginning when pond put the blindfold on phuwin kept running away from him which was both so funny and cute

also the host kept putting up numbers with his hand and asking 'how many are these' to a blindfolded pond and one of those times pond answered by going 🤟 and i was like POND GOD DAMMIT

btw phuwin invited everyone to the GMM building so jot that down. if anyone gets there and securities asks you something y'all can blame him now (jk)

phuwin's favorite scene in we are is the art room scene with a sleeping phum in episode 11, while pond's is the pool scene always in episode 11. THE TASTE THE VISION THE FLAVOR TRULY MEN AFTER MY OWN HEART

JIMMYSEA Q&A PANEL

i was sitting in the second row for the jimmysea panel so i could catch so many small moments i absolutely loved such as:

they had to press a buzzer for questions and they always did that together, with jimmy's hand being on top of sea's like 5 times out of 6

jimmy poured some water for both himself and sea and he made sure that sea drank some

there was a game with balloons where the two sides of the audience were supposed to get the balloons to the back and then bring them back to the boys, and we failed spectacularly on jimmy's side (HE FELT SO BETRAYED IM SO SORRY BBY), so when the balloon got to sea very quickly he pushed it back towards the audience to buy jimmy's some time

both p'tha and p'aof were actually sitting next to the audience on my side of the room watching jimmysea panel and in my head i was like EXCUSE ME SIRS CAN WE TALK [slides monopoly money towards p'tha for a new jimmysea series] [has WORDS with p'aof]

so the way questions worked was like. they had to press a buzzer and after that a spinning wheel with different colors would come up on screen and on whichever color it stopped on they had to pick a piece of paper of that same color with a random question written on it. during one of the spins, the wheel landed on yellow and jimmy picked one of the papers, but i think because of the lighting it actually looked green from the audience's pov, so everyone was screaming 'that's green'. however jimmy insisted that it was yellow, and that what we were saying was yellow was actually orange (the host was agreeing with jimmy but sea was agreeing with us so im still a bit confused on the matter sfjksgfj). then the host said 'we're still gonna do this one' (as in the yellow/green one that jimmy had already picked) but jimmy went 'two questions' and picked one of the yellow/orange ones too, so the host just turned towards the organizers like well since he's the one who said so. JIMMY JITARAPHOL TRULY A MAN OF THE PEOPLE (but also please stop giving nomnoms reasons to have beef with the color orange sfjkshfksg)

actual thing that happened:

host: describe each other in 3 words

jimmy: very cute creature. he's my cat

sea: my good boy

me: WHAT THE FUCK AM I EVEN WITNESSING RN

jimmy said he would like to play a detective in a future series and i almost vibrated out of my seat like YES PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES THAT'S A MAN AFTER MY OWN HEART HE KNOWS WHAT'S UP P'THA ARE YOU HEARING THAT PLEASE MAKE IT HAPPEN I HAVE SO MANY IDEAS I COULD GIVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sea said he wants to play a dentist but he actually meant dermatologist, he just messed up the word, and jimmy said that if we want him to be a dentist as well we should give him six more years sfjksjksf

at one point sea said 'mamma mia' and i burst out laughing so hard that's when i almost flung @petrichoraline's phone across the room (and that's when i also decided it was just better for everyone involved if i didn't try to take pictures or record stuff ;;;;;;;;;)

they also had to act out some words and when the host said 'sleep' sea was like 'i thought he (jimmy) would point at me' SON WHY ARE YOU CALLING YOUR OWN ASS OUT ✋😭 (and of course jimmy took the chance to point out that sea did in fact sleep right before the panel)

when the host said the word 'love' sea pointed at jimmy and jimmy pointed at the audience and then they were both quick at mimicking each other (so jimmy also pointed at sea, and sea also pointed at the audience)

SEA IS SUCH A GOOD SINGER AND JIMMY GOT SO MUCH BETTER TOO I WILL GENUINELY ACCEPT NO SLANDER TOWARDS THEM WHEN IT COMES TO SINGING AFTER THIS FANMEET

it was established that the most important words in italian are 1) mamma (mom), 2) pasta, 3) pizza, 4) ti amo (i love you). hard to disagree with that tbh

i think after this fanmeet i've really got to give it to jimmy and admit he actually might be an extrovert because he was just soooooooo ridiculously charming and witty and quick on his feet when it came to find funny answers and deal with some sound issue during his song like i really do think he shines when he's around people

i think you can tell sea is definitely more reserved compared to jimmy but what he doesn't have in expansiveness he makes it up with being so incredibly endearing like he really is just SO. DAMN. CUTE. (even if he tried to give me a heart attack by having his arms out for the fanmeet PUT THOSE GUNS AWAY SIR)

AUTOGRAPH SESSION

had a chance to get a closer look to pond and phuwin when they all walked inside the room and im trying to say this in a way that doesn't make me sound like an insane creep but like. the sheer amount of FACE pond has. i've seen him with my own two eyes and i still can't believe that's a real human being just going around his life. WITH THAT FACE. kinda understand now why greeks decided that the human form was the most important subject for artistic endeavour because jesus. that man really is sculpted by the gods

all that being said, i think the one whose pictures don't give him justice is sea. he is just so ridiculously handsome in real life and has the most beautiful smile i've ever seen i kinda. lost it a little about it ;;;;;;;

i think it's one of the reasons i suddenly got even more nervous and ended up messing up so badly ;;;;; i had this entire speech in my head about vice versa but i was so worried about holding up the line and the fact that everyone had even small gifts for them while i was empty handed and they were just. SO MUCH. so i just said 'hiiloveyouthankyou' to both of them and rushed away ;;;;;;;;; and i regret it so much because i think sea was trying to say something but after that he just went 'oh. love you too. bye' IM SO SFJKSHFKSGFJGSJDFJDK STUPID

FINAL CONSIDERATIONS

pondphuwin and jimmysea give off such different vibes and energies imho, at least during panels, like idk how to explain it but they truly feel like the cool kids and their silly goose uncles (and im saying this in the most loving way)

so. i guess this is the moment where i get a bit emotional about jimmysea. like i know im very biased but at the same time im also very aware that what we get to see of them is always somewhat performative, and yet. if before there was a part of me that was like 'this is gonna be a reality check and a reminder that i don't do parasocial relationships', that got pretty much crushed after this fanmeet. jimmysea genuinely look like the loveliest darlingest sweetest softest most precious boys who always make sure to thank everyone for getting where they are now. like my heart is so full of love for them i honestly don't know what else to say rn

if i have to find one negative thing (aside my blundering of the autograph session so badly) is the vice versa erasure. like both jimmy and sea had a solo song and that would have been the perfect opportunity for 'have i found' or 'by my side' but of course that didn't happen. one of the questions was 'what was your favorite scene to film' and they just assumed it was about last twilight. this is not me blaming them btw, because even when the fanmade video for them was played it only had last twilight scenes and moments so like. it's obvious they would think everyone just cares about last twilight. which is why i regret the autograph session so much and im sad im not the type of person who can just shout 'what about a vice versa scene!!!!!!' from the audience 🥲

this is also why i ended up buying the italian version of the vice versa novel btw BECAUSE IM NOTHING IF NOT A WEAK ASS PETTY HOE

my biggest warmest thank you goes to @petrichoraline who was just so endlessly patient and supportive and sweet and nice through it all, idk what would i have done without her. i also don't really have the words to properly express myself but like. I LOVE HER SOSOSOSOOSOSOOOOO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!

a big thank you and sorry also goes to @puppy-phum who is just sooooo lovely. i feel bad because i wasn't there for her as much as i wished to but im grateful we went through the photo and autograph sessions together. I LOVE HER SOOOOOOOOO MUCH TOO!!!!!!!!!!!

#time to overthink myself to death now!!!!!!!#but also god. if jimmysea ever come back to europe i really am doing this all-over again no matter what #i love them that much #also soooooo many italian bl lovers and im like. WHERE ARE YALL AT HOW DO I BEFRIEND YOU 😭#jimmysea #pondphuwin #m: txt

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fanficonly · 1 year

Text

Wenclair X Reader- What Are You? - Chapter 7

Yeah at this point I don't even think I know why it takes me so long to post... sometimes the drafts are just sat there and I spend a week trying to figure out what it's missing before I can post.

But either way, apologies for my lack of posting, working on some one-shots still aswell which I never posted ... shocker

Hope y'all enjoy😋

After pacing towards the foyer and turning back every few seconds to ensure you were not followed by the two persistent girls, you finally reach where your bags are situated and breathe a sigh of relief.

All here. All in tact. So you grab the jacket, your favourite might you add, out of your rucksack and pull it over your shoulders to cover the blood-stained white shirt beneath it.

Now ... If you take your stuff to your room will they be gone... That is the question.

You give it a few minutes, deciding to sit on your suitcase a observe your surroundings for a while, now that you no longer have a suspicious red patch on your back visible to the public view it seems safe enough. Besides, you need to give Wednesday and Enid time to leave your room, atleast you hope that's what they're doing. Leaving.

The odd student passes by you, some giving you light smiles or nods, others too wrapped up in drama or conversation to pay a random student the time of day, understandably.

But one. There's one student who, although you had been sat here for 10 minutes hasn't said or done anything and instead opts to stare at you from across the room.

"For God's sake" you curse quietly to yourself, rather disturbed at the amount of stalker-like attention you seem to attract from these outcasts.You flit your eyes back to him every once in a while and nothing about his stance changes. Creep.

He's a rather tall looking guy with long shaggy hair, sitting on one of the lounge chairs, a note book in hand and no sense of privacy it would seem as he makes no attempts to hide the fact that he is watching you.

You're painfully aware of his eyes on you but it would seem every time you look directly at him he flits his eyes back to the notepad Infront of him jotting down god knows what.

Another 5 minutes go by and you become lightly frustrated with the uneasy feeling of being watched so this time,when you feel his tortured eyes watching you, you whip your head around to stare directly at him giving him a "what the fuck are you looking at?" Kind of look.

He finally smiles, seemingly unfazed by your looks of judgement. You watch as he chuckles to himself looking away from you and gliding his pencil across the page again before standing up to approach you.

"Hi" he says,now stood Infront of you he looks even taller up close which for some reason annoys you. The audacity to just be like 'Hi' was enough of an annoyance that you're mind quietly screams at you to settle your emotions before someone gets hurt ...or worse.

But you won't get very far unless you reply so all you say is "Umm Hi can I help you?" standing up as you do, so you're not craning your neck so high just to look at him.

"Sorry I just- I was watching you and-" something in you snaps a little, the feeling of uncomfortable subsiding and being replaced with more annoyance that he had so casually stared at you for 15 minutes straight without any thoughts to how it would make you feel.

"Yeah I could tell you're not exactly discreet" you spit, raising your eyebrows in complete disapproval of his invasive actions

"Woah woah I'm sorry, sorry" he repeats raising his hands in defense. "I just- you looked so-" he squints his eyes shut and practically face palms at his own idiocy before taking a breath.

He shrugs and awkwardly rubs the back of his neck doing everything in his power not to make any unwanted eye contact with you. Suddenly, he no longer seems threatening and instead an intense vulnerability emits from his entire body.

"Sorry I didn't mean to snap it was just a bit weird, I don't like being stared at" you scold him but also try to settle the awkwardness.Not a lot you should be apologising for but you wanted to avoid unnecessary confrontation. I mean you don't even know what this guy is or who for that matter.

"No no you're completely right" he interjects " It is weird and I am really sorry for making you feel comfortable" he continues and seems genuinely annoyed with himself and almost ridiculously apologetic now "Let me explain?" he asks clearing his throat and looking to you for confirmation which you grant with a slight nid of your head. He doesn't speak though instead he just turns the notepad towards you.

"Holy shit" you mutter earning a step back from him and another laugh. His eyes widen at the curse not expecting that reaction of course but after shaking it off he smiles with pride.

The notepad you had earlier thought him to be writing in was actually a sketch pad. The image staring back at you was ... Well you, in the exact position you were only moments ago, perched on your suitcase staring off into the distance.

The sketch was incredible for a quick 15 minutes drawing, which is why it deserved the shocked reaction you had just given, it looked exactly like you. The hair, the eyes, the shape. It was like looking at a photograph.

"Thanks" he says smiling again "Sorry again I just saw you and it was like this perfect moment, you weren't paying attention to me but you were so engrossed in the world around you, I'm an artist so I just- I can't really control the pencil when it hits the paper you know" he explains further. A little cliché you think to yourself but at the same time you were no longer mad, the explanation was good enough and you more than anyone understood bad first impressions and hoping for second chances. It was basically your whole life

"No no I get it that's fine that actually- like wow you're really talented" you compliment his work, trying to move past the once impending altercation.

"I'm Xavier" he finally introduces himself holding out his hand for you to shake. Instantly you worry, again not really wanting to initiate any kind of physical contact especially from a stranger. So instead of out right offending the nice student who had offered you his hand you make a joke of it.

"And I'm a Germaphobe hehhh" you step back slightly holding your hands up and laughing a little.

He once again holds up his hands, one still grasping the notebook tightly between his boney hands "No problem uhhh" he points to you this time awaiting a telling of your name.

"Oh right yeah I'm Y/N I'm new" you state the obvious and he smirks slightly but before he can say anything, a loud " Yo Xavier!" Is yelled from somewhere in the near distance. The Lanky dude waved at his friends and looks back to you

"Well it was nice to meet you Y/N hope to run into you again" he walks off joining the boys and as he talks to them he looks back at you. You can only imagine the questions he is being asked right now as he ushers his friends away pushing them playfully into the halls and leaving you to get back to your quiet observing.

Eventually you find the strength to drag your bags to your room, mentally commending yourself for having a very small amount of belongings as you finally reach your door with one last huff.

While reaching for the handle you have a spine chilling feeling of someone's eyes on you and instinctively dart your eyes around in search of any immediate threat.

A few seconds go by and you roll your own eyes at yourself. God you were really on edge today, understandably, so you just shrug it off and make your way into your new quarters.

Meanwhile*

Wednesday and Enid had been left in your room

"That waaaaas-" Enid drags out the word, desperately racking her brain for the right adjective to describe the entire interaction between the 3 of you.

"Odd" Wednesday finishes, staring after Y/N for a brief second and then turning toward Enid.

"Very kooky" Enid smirks at Wednesday with pride as if she had just dropped the smartest quip of all time.

""Very amusing dear" Wednesday's eyebrows jump up as she turns to look at Enid with a somewhat tired look.

"You love it really" Enid giggles and skips over to her girlfriends side, squeezing her upper arm and inhaling her sweet scent.

"Not as much as I love you ma Cherie" Wednesday cooes, still reeling from her encounter with Y/N, she awards Enid a quick but lingering kiss and reaches for the wolf's hand for comfort.

"Soooo do we wait here orrrr..." Enid smiles deviantly at her bloodthirsty paramour. She would never admit it but seeing Wednesday get all worked up gets Enid all worked up and now because of this she was buzzing to retreat to the privacy of their dorm.

Wednesday, having become used to Enid's 'Hints', just squeezed her hand lightly and pulled the smitten werewolf along behind her. She stopped at the door and glanced back at the room, Enid's playful bliss still in full swing but her face contorting in confusion as to why they had stopped moving.

"Me amore this feels like a missed opportunity" the darker haired girl scans her eyes across the room with curiousity.

After a moment of thought Enid understands what her girlfriend is getting at

"We are not going through her room Wednesday!" She scolds tugging at her arms like a whiny child wanting to go home after a long day out.

"Why not? It doesn't seem like she has much here anyway" Wednesday defends, a glance of a hopeful smile fading across her lips.

Enid bites her lip, nawing at it in contemplation, taking a quick glance down the stairs then back at Wednesday, who takes the opportunity to stare deeply into the wolf's eyes. She caresses Enid's face, whispering against her lips

"Cara Mia" before connecting their lips once again then pulling back to gaze into Enid's eyes again. The blonde goes weak, in the knees, hazy from Wednesday's intoxicating scent and she hums in contentment.

When she pulls back and opens her eyes, Wednesday is staring at her in what can only be described as mischievous hope.

"Urgh fine" Enid concedes and Wednesday smirks and turns to re-enter the room.

"Works every time" Wednesday mutters, a sinister smile playing across her pale lips, while she starts scanning the small room.

"Not every time!" Enid follows behind Wednesday, in denial of the power of persuasion the Seer had over her.

"Hmm I seem to forget you have inhuman hearing abilities piccolo lupo" Wednesday hums again, flicking her dark eyes towards Enid before continuing on

"And don't you forget it" She hugs Wednesday from behind and the Ravenette takes a moment to inhale Enid's stimulating perfume before removing herself from her warm arms and getting down to business.

10 minutes go by and the once calm and calculated Wednesday was now back into full frustration mode.

"Baby I told you there's nothing here" Enid had watched Wednesday search the draws,wardrobe and surrounding area but to no avail and commended herself privately for remaining an innocent bystander.

"She must not have had her belongings sent to her room yet nobody is this minimal" Wednesday narrows her eyes "How unfortunate" she all but mumbles before pinching her chin in deep thought. After deliberating with the voices in her head she makes a decision

Wednesday runs her hand along the bed sheets, then stares hungrily at Enid, awaiting the werewolf's eventual realisation of what she was proposing. Look, If she wasn't going to get anywhere with their investigation she might aswell get somewhere else with her beautiful and inviting confidante

"Not here!" Enid almost immediately stutters out after letting her mouth fall open in surprise. Wednesday's ability to bewilder Enid to this day with her unpredictable advances is something the werewolf would never get over.

"I am sure she would not mind" Wednesday shrugs, raising her eyebrows suggestively.

"Who are you?" Enid narrows her eyes at her girlfriend suspiciously. Don't get her wrong, she had seen this side of Wednesday before but the occasions were very few and far between and usually she wanted something or had done something wrong which she was trying got make up for or was about to do something that she couldn't make up for.

Enid giggles though and Wednesday throws back the quilt to playfully entice Enid. But Wednesday notices Enid has pulled her attention away from her and is staring at something on the bed.

"Mon Chiot I am trying to do the whole 'hint' thing am I performing it incorrectly?" Wednesday asked a twinge of vulnerability escaping her tone.

"No no!" Enid fumbles her words "Great job babe but umm what's that?" She points towards the item in curiousity.

Wednesday follows Enid's colourfully painted, pointed finger to see that a piece of paper that had flung from the bed as she had thrown the covers back.

In one swift move Wednesday swipes up the letter and reads aloud "Y/N" before smirking and looking up at Enid with mischief in her eyes once again. "Finally" she deadpans, happy that her efforts to uncover more about Y/N were not entirely in vain.

"Baby I don't think we should read her mail it's private" Enid somewhat whines at the idea of being so intrusive but Wednesday just hums in response, still staring at the letter as if fighting an inner battle between right and wrong

"Wednesdaaaay" she eyes the shorter girl disapprovingly

"Calm cucciola, you will not be implicated in my federal offense I assure you" Wednesday holds her hand up to settle her girlfriend and begins to open the envelope. As if any part of that sentence was suppose to make Enid feel better... It didn't, of course, and she was unable to stop her impulses from taking control in order to stop her Girlfriend.

"Wednesday!" Enid jumps across the bed practically pouncing, arm out stretched, attempting to grab the letter from the Seer tight grasp. Her efforts were thwarted when Wednesday swiftly turns to the side in one quick move, only craning her neck down to watch her incredibly clumsy little wolf fall over herself and land at her feet.

"Enid this might be what we are looking for?!" Wednesday reaches out a hand to her beloved and smiles slightly when she clumsily clambers to her feet. "Why search if I'm not going to investigate what I find?" Wednesday speaks logically

"It just feels wrong" Enid Huff's out, swiping at her clothes.

"Everything I do feels wrong darling because It is, in fact, rarely do I do what society deems correct" she states fact and then insultingly remarks "honestly it's like you haven't known me for the last 2 years" Wednesday fights the urge to roll her eyes and steps back from the blonde and attempts to once again open the letter.

"No Wednesday" Enid's morality gets the best of her and drives over her curiousity as she attempts to grab the letter a second time. Naturally, Wednesday had done far worse and Enid had actually been implicated in her criminally and somewhat irredeemable behaviours but that didn't matter because she loved Wednesday and something about it all excited Enid. Plus, no matter what, her Girlfriend always found a way to protect her and bypass the law.

"Your efforts are futile my dear" Wednesday states bluntly as Enid claws at her girlfriend, playfully of course, to avoid her criminal intent.

"My efforts are not-" amidst the struggle both Girls freeze as they hear a loud bang and some fumbling coming from the bottom of the stairs.

"She's back!" Enid whisper screams at Wednesday letting out a small squeak in her panic state and Wednesday's eyes widen still gripping the letter tightly in her hand, her knuckles turning an even more pale shade as she does this.

#wenclair #enid sinclair #wednesday addams #wenclair fanfic #wednesday x enid #wednesday #wenclair x reader #wenclair what are you

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dirtytransmasc · 1 year

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What’s a Spider au you have that you feel is underrated and always wanted to talk about more?

my tsu'tey adopts spider au, it didn't take to my page as well as I would have liked it to. (I'm just gonna jot down whatever I think about, with little to no organization, just thoughts)

I just love it so much cause its the unlikely, grumpy, human-hating dad and his very human, ball of sunshine, son. plus, I'm disabled, I made tsu'tey disabled, and its just satisfying writing him, this man consumed by his own grief and self hatred coming around to the fact that the world is still turning, the suns still glowing, life isn't pointless, all because of this little child he can't get rid of. I see tsu'tey, had he survived, becoming a cruel recluse, not wanting to interact with anyone, wanting to hole up somewhere with his self pity as he wished he had just died, but instead he was stripped of everything and allowed to live. but now he has this little kid who loves him and couldn't live without him, who drags him out of his shell with his tiny little hands, forcing him to live after years of just barely surviving.

first tsu'tey just barely allows him around, not having the energy to push him away, but then he realizes he's one of the few people who gives the child any attention, and even in his prick state, can't cast the child aside to be alone. then he becomes a sort of mentor, teaching spider to be one with his spirit, his na'vi spirit bottled up in a human body. he was the one who taught spider the ways of eywa and The People, how to shoot a bow, how to hunt, how to sing and partake in the village's customs, how to fight. spider becomes a little tsu'tey, and tsu'tey becomes a whole new version of himself. tsu'tey himself finds he is much less burdened by hate and anger once he truly takes to spider, he's happier, he has a purpose again.

both are able to act almost in unison, knowing each other's habits, spider practically copying his dad, tsu'tey leaning into spider's personal spins on said copying. both are creatures of spontaneous habit, they do just about the same thing every day, might mix it up here and there, but not by much. they end up spending more time quietly enjoying one another's company, finishing each other's tasks, sentences when they do talk. its almost uncanny how similar they are, throwing other's off around them.

its not like they don't talk, its just that basic things go unsaid, tsu'tey doesn't need to ask for spider to pass his bow when they go out hunting or to stand behind him during conflict around the village. spider doesn't need tsu'tey to praise him, the look in his eyes is more than enough (though he always does), he doesn't need to ask his dad for a hug, he just knows, he doesn't need to tell him which way to go when he's tracking, they just read each other's bodies and went with the flow. that's truly what makes them so odd to be around, the perfect ebb and flow of either person, especially one na'vi and one human.

their lack of need to communicate basic things, leaves room for all sorts of conversation. stories, philosophy, songs, random info dumping from spider, lessons from tsu'tey. they love to debate the meaning of eywa's stories, the intention she has for the people, the state of the village and its leaders. not only are they warriors, but they are shit talkers, ex-olo'eyktan and ex-'son' of the now-chief, its a potent mix. spider picks up tsu'tey's love/hate relationship with just about everything that has to do with the village; he loves its dearly, would die for it, for jake and neytiri and the kids, but their is this shield of animosity, of deserved distaste, if only ever so mild. he has his qualms, but they never outweigh the love in his heart. in short, they are both a massive pain in the ass for jake, always yelling at him or critiquing how he does things, generally just being annoying. (jake needs them to go on a hunting trip or something, cause the level of criticism he gets is ridiculous, and he needs a break)

spider is still friends with the sully kids, but he is much more deeply ingrained in the village, as the unofficial son of the unofficial right-hand man of the chief. kiri is still his person, lo'ak is still his best friend, tuk is his partner in crime and unofficial little sister, neteyam is still like an older brother figure watching over him when he is with the sully kids. but spider is friends with most of the village kids, particularly tarsem, tsu'tey's younger brother.

the two grew up next to one another, tsu'tey introduced them shortly after spider wormed his way into the older mans heart, as he needed someone to tire the little one out when he couldn't keep. tarsem took to the little thing quickly, dubbing him his little brother, that is until he saw how tsu'tey looked at the boy with pride, then he started calling him his nephew.

within a year or two of taking spider under his wing he started taking the kid up to the lab himself, instead of meeting the scientist halfway. he would tuck the kid in, tell him stories, make sure he was soundly asleep and even then he would sit and watch, running big blue fingers through his whispy blonde hair, finding a smile on his face when the kid latches to his hand. norm has had to make sure he's wearing his mask on more than one occasion because the warrior has fallen asleep with the boy curled up in his side. he basically takes up all care of the boy, managing his curfew, meals, training, most of his education, and whatever else norm and max squabble to him about. its not hard, spider eats anything you put in front of him, takes pride in his lessons and training (cause who wouldn't want to be trained by tsu'tey, he holds it above all his friends heads), he loves when just about anyone messes with his hair, and overall he just likes being with his dad, so he never has much of an argument to anything he says. so spider is almost completely independent from the other humans at hellsgate or even the sully family.

spider is still blessed (by eywa, basically, pandora snow white), child of eywa (she nags him, like a mom, constantly), and hella fucking strong (cause boys gotta keep up). so tsu'tey is always caught marveling at the boy; watching him pull back a bow the size of himself, watching him romp and play with the most ferocious of creatures, have close-knit bonds with the giants of the forest, so divinely connected to eywa, speaking of her as if she was truly his mother, connecting to her in ways he had never seen before. spider was his special boy through and through, and he thanked eywa for him each and every day; that boy is the reason he lived, the reason he kept waking up each day, the reason he smiled again, the reason he continued in believing in the goodwill of the Great Mother again.

spider worries for tsu'tey a lot, despite how strong he is, he's still forever scarred by the injuries he sustained in battle. his dad is almost always in some amount of pain, his lungs are forever weak, his ability to bond and connect with his pali and ikran greatly diminished by the pain and fog that plagued him. the first few years, especially before he started to truly take care of himself, he would often collapse, coughing up blood, as his body protested being pushed past its limit. even as tsu'tey accepted his limits, doing his best to stay in good shape for spider's well-being, he still worried. he always tries to support his dad, taking up lots of village chores and insisting on cutting back on hunts or training when he's having a bad day, making up poor excuses when tsu'tey asks why. as he got older he accepted that this was just how life was going to be for his dad, how it would most likely not get any better, but as a young child he softened feared he was going to lose him. he would sleep with his ear to his dads chest, listening to the strong beat of his heart, assuring himself he was still there. he would beg him through tears not to leave him too, making tsu'tey's heart ache. now that he's older he is far less worried about him dying, much more worried about losing him to his own mind, again. tsu'tey isn't unaware of his child worry, but no matter how hard he tries, what he says or does, spider won't let him lift that burden from his shoulders. they're both stubborn, sometimes he loves that about his boys, and other times it's quite the opposite.

when tsu'tey is having a bad night, particularly with his lungs, spider will drag him up to hells gate, so he's forced to use his respirator, and have movie nights with him. its just an excused to pile all the blankets and pillows he can find onto the shitty matress in the media room and sleep in his dads arms, knowing that if anything happens, norm and max are only a shout away. plus, its kinda funny watching tsu'tey get all teary-eyed over earth films.

tsu'tey visits sylwanin a lot, and he always dresses spider as if he is their son, the son they never got to have. once spider finds a way to connect with The Great Mother, through her roots, he visits her as well. spider begins to treat her as his mom and she treats him like her son. they're a little family, even if separated by the veil between life and death.

I can't think of anything else about them, at the moment, but i would totally take asks for this au if anyone wants to know anything else.

#spider te rongloa tsu'tey'itan #miles spider socorro #miles socorro #spider socorro #tsu'tey #avatar 2 #avatar the way of water

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ourflagmeansgayrights · 1 year

Text

ofmd s2e1 rewatch where i pause to jot down my thoughts and other random shit

not quite a reaction post bc i've already watched the whole thing. not quite a liveblog bc it's one post and it's probably gonna take me a full hour to get through a 28 minute episode at the rate of pausing and typing i'll be doing

s2e1, s2e2, s2e3, s2e4, s2e5, s2e6, s2e7, s2e8

anyway, pirate time:

i love how much fun con is having choking on his own blood

dream!stede's extremely teary face right before he takes off running down the beach is doing psychic damage to me

also dream!stede's stupid ridiculous outfit with all the long ribbons and shit...

ed and stede make contact so hard shjfkhsgjkfd the loud OUGH sounds from both of them

also the return of ed's old beard! i didnt expect to see her at all this season, so that was a surprise.

"babe" "love" im tearing out my own hair

stede has yet to learn that ripping ass near your beloved can be a love language

stede is a terrible fucking roommate just deal with wee john's gas in silence like the rest of them. goddamn.

WHO HAS THE OUR FLAG MEANS DEATH TRAMP STAMP. WHO IS THAT.

i like when the background OST is familiar to me lol the little strings when stede starts his letter throwing me back to s1

olu: that–that's the swede the swede: Im the swede roach: he's single ;) me: *pissing my pants with laughter*

also the direct confirmation that the swede literally doesn't have a name. incredible

shjkfhdhfkj the crew encouraging him. stede's "it's okay" and roach "be brave" im CRYINGGGGG

stede doing customer service is something that can be so personal. "reservation?" "eat my fuckin' shit" "right! walk-ins, then" average restaurant experience

the random background guy saying "my favorite hand!" abt getting stabbed in the hand is making me giggle. i love the humor on this show

why does stede have so much shoulder movement going on when he's walking through the bar. whore behavior.

"this is for mom!" sorry but i want to know more abt whatever's going on there

also the purple mohawk. dope.

buttons is so distressed LET HIM RETURN TO THE SEA THESE CONDITIONS ARE INHUMANE

"i know the odds of you finding this are slim but so were the odds of us finding each other in the first place" IM RIPPING OFF MY OWN SKIN

also stede's lil sad hopeful smile after throwing the bottle... i care him

i love how they make this wedding fucking suck so we don't feel too bad abt the whole massacre thing. "the natural condition of humanity is base and vile. it is the obligation of people of standing, such as yourselves, to elevate the common human rabble through the sacred transaction of matrimony" if i was at a wedding and the officiant said that i'd also start killing people probably

yayy murder montage :)

FANG BREAKING THAT GUY'S SPINE OVER HIS KNEE

the whole cake scene is so fucking funny im sorry. i love u jim drawing the line at attacking a shitty wedding. i love u archie who wasn't here for the good old days so you dont really see a problem with how things are. i love u frenchie with ur box in ur brain that u never open again. i love u fang it's gonna get better i swear. i love u frenchie again bc u just took the cake right out of fang's hands while he was fucking sobbing hfjhgkjhdkjkf

I MISS IVAN JUSTICE FOR IVAN. wish they could've said he'd just fucked off somewhere instead of dying but i think that would've raised the question of why hasn't anyone else fucked off since they all seem so miserable

very relieved that stede isn't taking the racist/antisemitic caricature drawings of ed to make like a boyfriend scrapbook like some people were theorizing. would've been overkill if after episode 4 from last season stede still didn't realize that ed hated these sorts of depictions of him.

INTERESTING DETAIL THO the background music in this scene is "a pirate's life" aka the song frenchie sang in the pilot. it's an instrumental version obviously but yeah i recognize that tune

also more cool background ppl with dyed hair man i love this show

zheng yi sao flirting with olu is so good. he deserves it.

how nice of ed to offer his drugs to the crew. sharing is caring.

also it's so funny to me that the thing izzy is tormented by is ed saying "you can't do the job, someone else will" the toe thing's happened three times and apparently that was fine but the thing the show edits together right before izzy breaks down into the most pathetic aheemheem whimpers isn't any of that it's ed threatening to fire him

also they cut ed throwing knives at izzy!! what the hell.

releasing the clip of izzy crying kinda ruined it for me when it came time to watch it in the show bc i watched it several times since it dropped and now seeing it in context i was like "ok i've seen this already fast forward." i mean i didnt fast forward through it but i did kinda zone out bc i've seen this bit already. this post kinda sums up my thoughts on it

"trifling ingrate plan" dshkjfshgdskhfjkhgkjh

"SEMI-CLEAN WATER"

JACKIE CALLING THE SWEDE "BOO CAKES"

"i know that guy we had breakfast together!" "you'll be having a lot of breakfasts-es together" "oh, okay" i fucking love this whole dynamic like i can tell they're writing the swede out of most of the episodes for budget reasons (sorry nat faxon) but by god do they give him such an excellent fucking send-off. can't wait to see him again when he's in his trophy husband number 20 era

roach is upset abt not being able to cook, buttons is tied up so he doesn't go running back to the sea (i assume). stede you are not giving your crew the environment they need to thrive.

olu being an optimist :)

buttons opens his mouth to drink the rain and in the background u can see roach yanking the rope around buttons back fhdjskgfjhgkjfh STEDE YOUR SEA WITCH CANNOT THRIVE IN THESE CONDITIONS

stede tries to make things sound good in his bottle letters to ed but out loud he says his actual insecurities... it's so fucking tasty tho that he thinks ed could be doing better without him and THAT'S why he's been stalling so much. not afraid for his life even a little bit he just assumes he's not wanted. brb i have to cry now

"im sorry if that's a little bit creepy" "you are creepy" in this scene where they're soaked from the rain. ofmd said this prince ricky guys is creepy and wet.

stede's fucking FACE when prince ricky says "you're my hero" his fucking "clearly you dont own an air fryer" face I CANT STAND HIMMMMMM (affectionate)

prince ricky "these rubes" "men of our standing" yeah i cant fucking stand this guy (derogatory) i love how he's barely even in this episode

stede's face when the swede is talking abt how happy he is with jackie... my man believes in love so much im gonna cry

also in what fucking way does the swede owe them a life debt. roach and buttons literally tried to eat him

izzy's "you know me better than anyone knows me and i daresay the same about you" this is literally so false i dont even know where to begin. izzy in e6 being like "if i didnt know any better i'd think maybe ed might possibly maybe be actually enjoying bonnet's company" while ed and stede are giggling and making each other friendship bracelets. this guy doesn't know ed at all.

also i cant get over how izzy wont make eye contact he's like staring blankly into the middle distance delivering these lines so flatly until he goes to say "i have... love for you" and in that moment he looks like he'd rather ed were feeding him more toes.

"im worried about you, we all are" not gonna lie my dude you've had a weird way of showing it thus far. where was all that worry when you told him he was better off dead than wearing a robe and singing songs?? where was that fucking love then?

and NOW izzy wants to talk it through. izzy literally voted to make blackbeard great again and now he wants to give open communication a chance???

lmao there's a limit to how many characters can be in a bulleted list so here's fucking. part two. on the same post:

ed asking everyone if the vibe is poisonous and fang cant stop crying and ed's face is just like "eh good enough" im fdhksgfkjtdkh

anyway ed with a loaded gun under his chin talking to himself is hurting me so fucking much actually. ed my beloved babygirl for whom i would die. this poor traumatized man. yes he is making this workplace toxic as hell but god. GOD. im gonna throw up.

the way ed is so fucking casual about shooting izzy in the leg. just calm and jovial as he promotes frenchie to first mate. stepping over izzy all crumpled on the floor. everything about this is so fucking good. i mean it's horrible for ed and everyone around him but for me watching the show this shit is DELICIOUS. i love when the pirates get violent and unhinged i love when this shit gets fucked up. ed's mental state is so bad right now and it is causing me severe anguish but also it is so tasty. fuck.

anyway frenchie trying to turn down the promotion fhjkghdfjkhf

the cut to the swede performing the husbandly duties is INSANE. COMPLETE TONAL WHIPLASH. I LOVE THIS SHOW.

"fuck those hammies up!" spanish jackie i love you

black pete why are you so fucking loud AND WHY WOULD YOU JIX IT LIKE THAT???

why is prince ricky so small. he's like a full head shorter than stede. also this guy is insufferable i love how stede just fucking abandons him fhjkgdhkdfghkj

"the calf muscle is the most mysterious of alllll the muscles" what the FUCK does that even mean. oh swede i will miss you

NOSE REMOVAL FUCK YES. I LOVE THIS SHOW.

obsessed with the swede playing dumb. the dramatic gasp. "wow, so bad!" fhjsghdkjf

"aint you that soup bitch?" "im the money bitch" i love women.

sfdsjkh spanish jackie being into double-crossing. and slapping the swede's ass on the way out. i love this show

i love how zheng says "this much indigo is worth three times what i paid" while spanish jackie and the husbands are still like, right there. and they just don't hear that bit. incredible.

OUGH the back of jim's weird rope armor looks like a ribcage that's so cool

i love how jim is so fucking bad at telling this story. i love how the monkey's paw comes into it. i love fang asking them to do the voice. i love archie trying to hold back her laughter i love jim and fang giggling together I LOVE THIS SHOW

ed's fucking voice breaking through his whole convo with frenchie. im tearing out my own teeth

HEY DID YOU GUYS KNOW THEY HAVE POST-CREDITS SCENES IN THIS SEASON?????????? WHAT THE HELL

i take back what i said about jim being bad at telling this story their version is so much fucking better. squeaky voice "I pray to you, Dark Lord, to make me real flesh! I want to be real flesh!" IM FUCKING OBSESSED. JIM I WOULD DIE FOR YOU

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mxliv-oftheendless · 4 months

Text

My thoughts jotted down as I read The Silmarillion for the first time:

The Silmarillion has been pretty good so far so I thought it’d be fun to record my personal thoughts as I read! I’ve been mainly reading this book in chunks, so the end of the bullet points is where I’ve stopped for the day. But enjoy my weird thoughts!

To my Taemin photocard that I used as a bookmark when I read the Lord of the Rings books: Alright, Taemin, we’re going in.

This reads very biblically, is it supposed to be??

Ah, so Melkor’s main problem is that he can’t create anything new himself, only corrupt and twist things that are already there.

(Finally understanding random bits of info I’ve learned online) Ohhhh, THAT’S what that is! Cool!

Ok Yavanna DEFINITELY loves hobbits.

Ohhh Nienna DEFINITELY likes Frodo.

So are the Eagles servants of Manwë???

Damn this worldbuilding is ELITE!

(“But Ulmo was alone, and he abode not in Valinor, nor ever came thither unless there were need for a great council…”) Sounds like my dream tbh

(Ilúvatar talking about his plans to create Elves and Men and how much he loves the Earth) Uhhh you may want to look into that a bit more, bud.

Huh. I’ve never thought about the human struggle to find the meaning of life and life’s purpose as being a gift, but it makes sense, since humanity as a whole constantly seeks to learn and grow and expand beyond what we already know.

Maybe that’s also why Melkor hates men, because they’ll always seek to learn more and expand to outside his influence and control, so by nature of their existence he can’t control them.

(Reading about Aulë being willing to smite the Dwarves for Ilúvatar before Ilúvatar stops him) So that’s a reference to the Bible story of Abraham and Isaac, right??

Ohhhh so that’s why the Elves and Dwarves hate each other… I don’t really care for that.

So who would be the one to create therapy??? Would that be Nienna??

“Next came the Noldor, a name of wisdom.” *laughs in very basic knowledge of what’s about to happen next*

Remarriage and your son hating his stepmom and half brothers; yeah I can definitely see this being a problem.

Oh yeah this is DEFINITELY going to be a problem.

I dunno why I always love the bad guys in stories, but I just think Ungoliant is kinda cool.

“But Liv she lives only for herself and her own consumption and she’s a SPIDER” YEAH AND IT’S FUNNY AND SEXY WHAT’S YOUR POINT

*Ungoliant eats the Trees two pages later*

Damn, the cruel irony of Fëanor and Fingolfin reaching a truce and everything looking like it’s going to be okay RIGHT as Melkor and Ungoliant destroy the Trees… I bet Tolkien was giggling evilly to himself while he wrote that chapter.

#the silmarillion #silmarillion #lord of the rings #tolkien #tolkien legendarium #jrr tolkien #books #bookblr #it’s a very good book so far!!#I’m really enjoying it!

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thatfreshi · 1 year

Text

"Deny Him" (Uni AU P. 2)

This might be the weirdest party you've been invited to.

tw - alcohol/drugs slightly mentioned, light description of sex, hints at abuse

@justporo

You're a little shocked, immediately being invited to a party by a model who doesn't even know you. Astarion looks you up and down, his eyes narrowed.

"Okay, well you most definitely cannot go like this. Come darling, I'm sure I have some clothes to spare."

He doesn't wait for you, simply beginning to walk, expecting you to follow. You do indeed follow, and he just keeps talking.

"So what do you think of our dear Shadowheart?"

"She doesn't seem to like you."

He shrugs.

"Not many people do. I'm an acquired taste, for only the most refined palettes."

He goes into his coat pocket, grabbing his room key, quickly entering.

"I know just the thing to give you, mainly because I'm so tired of it sitting in my closet.

The room is quite nice. You put together in your head that RAs must get their own rooms, because it's set up more like an apartment than a dorm. The two of you walk into his bedroom, which is surprisingly empty. It's also quite dark, as he took the liberty of putting up blackout curtains. Astarion opens his closet, which is full of random mismatched designer pieces, ranging over the past six years. He's precise as he moves the hangers around, finding a floral jacket.

"Here. You can keep it. It's so 2017 anyways."

You don't fully understand what that means, and you're not sure if being 'so 2017' is an insult, but you go along with it. The jacket fits pretty well for it not being tailored to your body.

"And if you ever need some extra money, you can probably sell that for a quick five hundred dollars."

Your eyes go wide, suddenly very scared to ruin a piece of fabric. Why is he giving a stranger something so expensive? He continues to look around in his nightstand, you're not sure for what. You start trying to remember what you've read about this man. There's been a lot of talk online recently on if his eyes are actually red, or if they're just contacts.

"So, are your eyes really red?"

He laughs.

"Gods no. That's the magic of editing my dear. Technically they're brown, but they look red in some lighting, and my editors have decided to play into it."

"And the hair?"

"Oh, it looks far too healthy to be bleached. All natural darling. Have you never seen an albino before?"

"I guess I haven't."

Without saying anything, he finally finds what he's looking for, a short gold necklace adorned with opals.

"Now, I do want this back, and if you break it I will ruin your life, promise."

He clasps is around your neck, hooking it properly on the first try.

"There. Decent enough I suppose. Besides, I don't have time to give you a proper makeover. You do have good bone structure though. Anyways, off we go!"

Shadowheart was right, he really doesn't stop for anything. It's a little intriguing though, how fast his brain works. All of his movements are so precise, decisive. Even something as simple as opening the door, the way his fingers wrap around the doorknob is carefully thought out. It's as if someone's following him, looking for mistakes, jotting down everything he gets wrong.

The two of you make some small talk on the way to the parking garage, which he doesn't seem all that interested in. He still walks in front of you, his coat leading close behind him because of just how fast he walks.

"So, what exactly is this party you're taking me to?"

"Just something Szarr put together for him and a couple of designer friends. The seven of us though, we're expected to be everywhere he is."

You can't see him, but he says it through gritted teeth.

"Why?"

"I've always assumed it's to show off. He likes to make it clear that he has refined taste in models, especially to his peers."

"And that doesn't bother you?"

Your question stops him in his tracks, as if no one's ever asked. You almost run into his back due to the sudden stop.

"No."

He says it slowly, and continues walking again, cautious at first. Nothing else is said of it. When you approach Astarion's car, it's more run-down than you expected. It's clearly an older model, something that's been repaired multiple times. You take the shotgun seat. The car ride is silent, and you mainly watch the details of his hands as he drives. They're a little shaky, slender. You have to admit, they're quite attractive. You watch as he shifts gears when you get onto the main street. It's almost peaceful, the silence, the city lights at night. Of course, until there are red and blue lights behind you.

"Shit. I'm already going to be late."

He hisses, pulling over to the side of the road. Oddly enough, he doesn't go to grab his driver's license. Instead, he just rolls down his window, waiting for the officer to come up to him. You watch in awe at how he just doesn't seem to care.

"License and- oh not you again."

He slides his shades down.

"Hello darling. Nice evening, isn't it?"

"I can't keep letting you get away with speeding."

"Oh, what's five miles over the speed limit?"

"Illegal, that's what it is."

"I'm sure I could make it worth your while if you let me off with a warning."

His words become slow and drawn out, like nectar from his tongue.

"You're lucky you know people around here. Go on, get out of here."

And with that, the officer leaves, and Astarion pulls back onto the road, not even waiting for the police car to leave. You're in awe of his audacity.

"Did you just... did you just try to bribe him with sexual favors?"

"Hm, did I? Bad habits are hard to kill I suppose."

He doesn't say anything else, leaving you to ponder his actions. Perhaps he's a little spoiled at his level of fame, but there's something else, and you can't quite put your finger on it. Before you can come to any kind of conclusion, you're parked outside some unassuming bar.

"Here we are darling. Don't worry, this place has a basement level that's much nicer than meets the eye."

When you make it inside, there's a single bartender cleaning beer mugs. Astarion gives her a nod, and walks to the back, where a door leads to a small staircase.

"After you."

His smirk is different now, almost as if he changed it on purpose. You walk down, and he follows closely behind. The sounds of music and chatter fill your ears, and the smell of smoke hits your nostrils, almost making you cough. You try to clear your throat, earning a chuckle from the model. When you reach the floor, the room is filled with a thin haze of smoke, with plenty of rich-looking people draping themselves across velvet chairs, talking about whatever yacht they just invested in and what stocks they're insider trading.

"Well, look who decided to show up. Szarr's been looking for you."

You recognize this woman as Aurelia, another one of the seven. Her reddish-brown hair is put back in multiple braids. Astarion is slightly tense at Aurelia's words.

"What did he say?"

For the first time since you met him less than a hour ago, he sounds uncertain. The woman meets your eyes, and then looks back at him.

"Private business. I'd be quick about it. Sure being late won't help matters much."

He sighs.

"Alright, well take my friend Tav here. I'll be back."

Just like that, he's gone.

"Tav? What a fun name. It's Aurelia, but I'm sure you've heard. My, my, he picked a gorgeous one, didn't he?"

It's almost as if she's looking right through you. Then, you process her words.

"What do you mean 'picked?'"

"We often scout for other models, for lesser shows that Caz- Szarr, is involved in. His Winter showcase is coming up, and Astarion hasn't exactly been pulling his weight as of recent. I assume he found you to try and appease him. After all, your bone structure is wonderful."

The same thing he told you earlier.

"I assume though that he was sloppy, and didn't tell you this beforehand."

"No, he didn't mention it."

"Well don't worry. Szarr will give you the whole spiel on why you should work for him, the fame and glamor, the money."

She gets close to you, wrapping her hand around your ear.

"Deny him."

Before you can ask her what she could possibly mean, or why you should deny him, Astarion comes back with Szarr in tow. Of course, you've never seen him in person, but his energy is quite off-putting. His black hair is slicked back, and his neck is adorned in many expensive chains.

"And this is Tav? A pleasure."

Without asking, he leaves a kiss on your hand, lasting on your skin a little too long.

"I'm sure you've seen my work, and my gorgeous children."

Something is wrong. Extremely wrong. You don't know what, but his voice makes you feel nauseous. Why would he call them his children?

"Of course. Although, I will admit I'm not much for fashion."

His mouth droops slightly, but it's all an act. He already knew what you were going to say.

"What a shame. And here I was just thinking about how your shoulders would make my latest dress look spectacular. Well, I'll leave you all to socialize then."

As he begins to walk away, he lingers by Astarion for a moment, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"And perhaps lay off the champagne tonight? You're looking a little puffy."

His hand grips the pale man's shoulder, causing him to wince a little, before he disappears into the crowd.

"What did you say to them Aurelia?"

"Just that you were trying to pimp them out to our lovely boss."

"God damn it, can you just keep your mouth shut?!"

You must look hurt, because when Astarion meets your eyes again, he almost looks guilty.

"It's fine. I'll find some other way to get back in his good graces. Apologies Tav. Most people jump at the opportunity to model for a man like that. I figured you would be that same."

"Like I said, you're losing your touch. Soon enough you won't be his favorite anymore."

The whole thing is making your head spin. This whole thing with Szarr, it almost feels like a cult. Your anxiety is spiking, your body screaming at you to leave. You listen, and turn to make a quick exit back up the stairs.

"Tav, wait."

Light footsteps follow you up the stairs.

"No, this is weird! Whatever's going on here, it's not right. Something isn't right."

As you hit the top floor, his hand grips around your wrist, gracefully turning you to look back at him. He was right, in the moonlight his eyes do look red.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought you into all of this, I've just been a little... desperate. It really is fine, but my plan wasn't to make you uncomfortable."

"How do you work with him? He seems, disgusting."

He looks off to the side, clearly thinking about what to say. Instead of speaking though, his eyes meet yours again, his gaze bouncing between yours and your lips.

"Aurelia was right. You are gorgeous."

The tone suddenly shifts, and his hands creeps up from your wrist to your face, pulling you into a kiss. You give in, the attraction for him somehow growing. He laces a hand in your hair, and soon you're both stumbling back out to his car, forgetting about the events from moments ago. The two of you fall into the back seat of the small car. Maybe you go along with it since you haven't slept with anyone in a while, or maybe because you simply can't pass up the opportunity that's been presented to you. It's mind-altering though, the sex. The same way he is with everything else, he's precise and decisive. He knows every spot on your body as if he's studied it his whole life. When things wind down, and you both catch your breath, something in his eyes shifts, pushing his hair back into place.

"We should get back. Sure you have a busy day tomorrow."

With that, you're putting your top on in the back seat of a stranger's car. When you do get back in the shotgun seat and look over at him, you remember the police stop, and what he said to you after.

Bad habits are hard to kill.

#baldur's gate 3 #astarion #baldurs gate astarion #astarion x reader #astarion x tav #angst #freshiau

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slow-writer · 7 months

Text

TMAGP (and TMA, indirectly) Spoilers and Thoughts...

You have been warned...

I wasn't part of the original TMA crowd back when it was first airing. I'd heard mutterings of it, but never really thought much about it. To be honest, I probably wasn't mentally ready for it back then. Instead, my younger sister started listening to it last year and then kept talking about it until something she said made me go, "Y'know what? Okay. I'm in."

I ended up bingeing through it during work this past October, and holy sh*t. I fell down the rabbit hole hard. (Maybe, in this case, it would be more akin to running face first down those coffin stairs? I digress.) Being so new to it when everyone else had already been swallowed up by the sky, it was cool to dig into the Wikis that had already been made, to see the links and foreshadowing.

But now, it's the beginning of TMAGP, and I actually get to listen the day they release, to jump on here, or reddit, or tiktok, or wherever to be a part of the theorizing AS IT HAPPENS. And boy oh boy, I'm happier than Simon Fairchild in the stratosphere.

Do I have a notebook to jot down my thoughts as I listen? Of course, I do. Do I have multiple tabs open, some with ARG info, some with TMA info, and yet more with references to alchemical symbols and practices? Duh. Have I started my own spreadsheet for it all? Well, if you knew about my Lego Dimensions spreadsheet.... nevermind. Yes, I have.

But nothing beats being able to talk (or type) about it with other fans, like my sister, or those faceless avatars (lol) of the interwebs. And man, has my brain been CHURNING.

First, let me get out of the way that I wasn't able to take part in the ARG as it was happening, and my goodness! I'm so happy there are other people out there like me who were able to sum up and load it up for the rest of us to learn about. No idea how much of it will be *necessary* to unlock all the secrets, but I'm the kind who loves to know trivia just cos. And the details I am learning definitely pull me deeper.

Second, I feel like in the beginning of TMA, there was barely anything for the listeners to dig through. One guy working on behalf of an organization, trying to dig through seemingly implausible and overly spooktastic first-hand statements dating back centuries that are in crazy disarray from the previous archivist, and he's laying on a hefty helping of "this is utter balderdash, complete poppycock, and absolute piffle" opinion. It was a slow burn, something that (as an American, and being exposed to so much more instant gratification in storytelling than necessary) UK storytellers seem to be experts in, and was even more expertly done in this case, since so many little things had to eventually build up without listeners automatically assuming what would happen next, without them getting bored.

But TMAGP is already so full of so much extra stuff, so many little things (even before it was released) that we may all get BURIED in the sheer amount of data we think is vital. We're not listening to tapes this time, we're definitely listening via internet-connected devices, like computers, mobile phones, and security cameras. So, while TMA had old tape recorders magically appearing (or were they being dragged by hordes of spiders?) and switching themselves on so they could hear all the random happenings within the archive, TMAGP is no longer reliant on such hand-wavery. Whatever/whoever is listening can do so from anywhere to anyone they want. That makes the world of TMAGP

SO MUCH BIGGER.

Third, I know not everyone who listens to these things is like me (or, let's face it: us--there are so many fans doing regular deep dives on here, we should have our own categorization on the wiki). There are bound to be listeners who just leave everything at face value and wait for the story to unfold itself organically, and when it's done, it's done. But even as an adolescent, when I got into something, I did my best to listen to, watch, or read everything I could find on that very niche thing. At least for a while. (Hello, undiagnosed ADHD!)

So, I watched/listened to a couple interviews and Q&As regarding the new show prior to release. And while both Alex and Jonny have been clear saying you don't have to have listened to TMA to enjoy TMAGP, I kind of think just saying that is leading us TMA fans in a very specific direction. And I think it's very intentional, and that a lot of fans either haven't heard about it yet, or are choosing to ignore it.

They say that TMAGP is tangentially related to TMA in that there will be familiar themes, but

it's taking place in a completely different universe from TMA;

time in TMA worked differently (especially during the Entity Torturepalooza in S5) towards the end, so dates of events there may not line up with dates or events in this universe; and

the main or overarching theme is different.

In TMA, the story was "what makes a monster a monster?" As in, is there a line one crosses that they can't return from? Is it a physical manifestation, like it alters their appearance? Is it an action they have to take? And does that action have to be done willingly, or can it be coerced? Does becoming the monster to protect someone else, or to achieve a greater good... does any of that matter?

In TMAGP, they've already said that the story will be "what makes a person a person?"

The implications of that sentence are many and mind-boggling.

I first thought it had something to do with the idea of the humane (not human): kindness, empathy, compassion. The ties that bind us together as people (like being fans of a little horror podcast from across the pond) could be part of this.

But, now that we have 5 episodes out, and a metaphorical army of lore-deep-divers digging through every word and sound effect and episode title, I think we can truly start to figure out where we're heading.

Artificial Intelligence.

It struck me as I was re-listening to the first episode this morning. (I really am trying to fill out my spreadsheet in a semi-logical manner and with as many pertinent details as possible, really. That's the main reason I was doing that this morning. At least, that's what I tell myself.) We are hearing all these happenings over web-connected devices (don't think I don't see you, Alex and Jonny, and your oh-so-hilarious punning!), the OIAR employees are working on a modified business-forward version of Windows NT 4.0 that precedes Windows 95 that has a name that we interpret as 'Freddy' (or Freddie, depending on where you are in the transcripts), one of the documents from the ARG was a spreadsheet called 'Klaus' (which IS the name of the former IT guy Gwen's asking about because she heard/saw young Lena arguing with him), and we have at least 3 text-to-speech "voices" that Alice has given names (Chester, Norris, and Augustus).

All of that was running through my brain, and then I heard this passage within the first few minutes of the episode:

LENA - Nonsense. Sam is the only one who has had any cake so far. GWEN - And that was only because you practically forced it down his throat. SAM - No, no, it was… nice. LENA - People like chocolate cake.

People like chocolate cake? She didn't even ask her employees (all 5 of them at that time) what flavor they'd prefer, or if they'd want something else? No. She just knows a fact that "people" like chocolate cake, so of course, her employees--who are people--would like chocolate cake.

Almost like a computer following a logic-based workflow, perhaps?

Lots of people have been trying to figure out who in the office is the Big Bad, and many are saying Gwen just because of her ambition and her last name (Bouchard), but I think her name is a red herring. Others are saying Alice knows more than she lets on (and so many are hating on her, and I will NOT ABIDE THE ALICE DYER SHADE because I love her and I would very probably hide bodies for her) but I agree that certain things she's said are a little sus, though they really could just be her personality. I really have known some women like her, and they are some of my favorite people. (Plus, the fact that we now know that she's the most tenured employee at the OIAR--save possibly Lena--does make the brain churn some more.)

But with this line about chocolate cake, and how she was unable to join them at the pub, and how we haven't had a scene with her outside of the OIAR office, it makes me think that Lena might just be part code.

[Let me also add this really quick: I've seen A LOT of people trying to make the current episodes fit into Smirke's 14 +Dekker's 1, but I don't think the Entities as we codified them are what we're dealing with in this universe. I think trying to link everything back to that show will be a lot of wasted thought, because as they said, this isn't a direct sequel. (Do I think it's actually Jon, Martin, and Jonah--yes, Jonah, not Jurgen--trapped in the computer system? A bit, but it won't shatter my appreciation if the voices are something else entirely.)

Plus, I've seen others saying that the statements we've heard, while creepy, aren't all necessarily to do with fear. Most of them are about desires and obsessions.

The woman who wanted so desperately to see her dead husband again that she'd get scammed over and over to possibly resurrect him;

the person who wanted to spelunk an 'unsolved' site to the point of crime;

the woman who wanted to finally feel comfortable in her skin to the point of disfiguring herself;

the man who wanted so badly to climb out of his assigned station and achieve fame that he'd regularly 'feed' his violin blood from other people;

and the man who wanted to feel the same terror he felt when watching scary movies with his dad when he was a kid to the point of chasing down 'borderline illegal films' and ignoring LITERALLY ALL the red flags to the end.

I think that theory is the closest to what we may actually encounter.]

I've seen others on reddit saying they think that this series will be about the race to create the philosopher's stone--the stone that creates the elixir of life and, essentially, immortality. I think it's a valid idea. But, what if it went further than that?

Because with all the alchemical hints dropping in the show's logo, the ARG, and the 3-category system to the statements (yes, I'm keeping track) that could make one think of the spirit, the mind, and the body in alchemy....

What if they're trying to create life from software?

What if these entities or desires or whatevers have been working through some ancient busted code, feeding off statements from "real" humans experiencing strong emotions, watching the employees that work with it every single night, so they can create something as close to a human as possible from just wires and 3 decades of unreadable code?

Oh lord... it just occurred to me that--due to this being a HORROR podcast--they might need to collect a skin suit for the Not Quite Human. Is that what happened to Klaus? Ick. And now I'm hoping I'm wrong.

#the magnus protocol #tma #the magnus archives #tmagp #rant post #theory

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alpydk · 1 month

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How do you do that? (Fanfic writing)

I've not seen many of these posts. I always see a "well the words come in my head and I just do." So I'm going to be me and write too much and tell you how my work process is for writing and how I write the stuff I do. Good? Good. - Warning - This is a long post.

Step 1! The idea!

The best stories are written in truth. So if you have something you've experienced, adapt it and get it down. 1, it's therapeutic. 2, you can channel your own emotions and experience into it. It's more real when there is something behind it. Take f.x The Moment - a lot of my personal experiences and trains of thought went into that and it gives the character in it a lot more life.

"she would sit alone in her tent, her legs pulled close to her chest, her eyes on her pack comparing the pros and cons of the act, before eventually she would move to the campfire where her allies would act as her unknown protectors." - I've done this with the pros and cons and eventually just sticking around people. Real experience = More relatable to the reader.

Other ideas come from common tropes you see in movies, tags I've seen on Ao3 which light something in me, scenes in movies that I've loved and just a vivid imagination that's very dramatic. Seriously folks, write down your daydreams.!

Step 2! Planning!

For poems, don't plan and do very little editing. Some will probably hate that. I'm expecting Jourdane to be biting the bars of her cage at that statement, but the best poems just flow from the heart (At least in my case.) For fics, I grab a pen and jot down an outline. You've seen my pokemon book and the many pages with random notes like "FEELINGS, Comfort smut." - This gives me my basis, the start middle and end, what characters will be involved and the dots I need to connect. I'll usually also include some inner perspectives I want to put in. f.x "Guilt/Fear/Control" - Sort of character themes. This reminds me of the character motives and reactions so they don't go off as I'm writing.

Now, this doesn't mean the plan will change as I write. It has done in the past, but that just means a new load of notes is written.

Step 3! The writing!

This is the part you all really want. I'm going to use some of As you Wish - To break it down.

Descriptions

When it comes to fanfic, especially in canon, we already have a set idea of the characters and locations in our mind. So I spend very little time on character and location descriptions unless they matter in the scene.

"Pale fingers spun the wedding ring mindlessly on the wooden table of the tavern as the now owner of the band spoke." -

Pale fingers, that's a signature of Astarion, could also talk about hair colour, red eyes, key features. For Gale, it's usually robes, dark eyes, beard. The wedding ring (most associate with gold or silver but it is not important, mind fills it in). The wooden table in the tavern, brain will hopefully put us in the Elfsong or similar - but again, not really important, as this is not what the scene or story is about. I stick to what is needed, or it just becomes more about details than the message. Dialogue

Start with the canon dialogue. Do not be ashamed to use it to give you an idea of how characters talk. You see in the game that Gale is very wordy. I am not. So what I do is take a standard line and then 'Gale it up' - What I mean is I go onto OneLook - Take a word and replace it with something more intellectual. Gale does not say "I'm sorry" very often. He says "My apologies" He doesn't say "we're talking about."; he says "We're discussing..." - You get the idea. Include character actions they commonly do. Astarion in mine spends a lot of time scoffing and smirking. Flamboyant hand actions and the like. Karlach speaks loudly, Gale gestures and gazes. Emotions A lot of thinking, a lot of wondering, a lot of feeling. So much character introspection put into non dialogue parts. Either in the form of some internal monologue. "Of sorts... Of course, he’s said it like that," or questions the character would ask themselves. "What would happen with it tomorrow as they took on their final battle with the Netherbrain?" Combine with genuine ways the characters would question these things, how a real person would act. So many fics I've read either become very 2 dimensional with their characters. They spend so long on direct dialogue or physical descriptions that they miss what makes a person a person, and it's this inner soul that speaks more than anything. It's the doubts and the worries and the love and the happiness we FEEL. It needs to be written in too. Take, for example, Gale - Man is filled with self doubt, crushed under the weight of his past with Mystra. He may act outwardly confident, but inside he's not. These things need to be included to get it right.

Poetic Language

The analysis part... I like to call a spade a spade. If I've used a metaphor or something, it is exactly how it's meant to be used. There is no speculation of meaning, no "but the author is possibly conveying a sense of loss through the description of the red carpet." - There's a place for that and I'm sure that's what makes other people's fics considerably better than mine, but I don't have the time or longing for that. My comparisons are very obvious, again so the reader can relate. "What was marriage if not chains to bind?" - See? Very obvious way of thinking that marriage is a prison, and it not only includes the emotions of the character's introspective thoughts but also some of that well-used billedsprog (picture language, can't think of the English word - am not schooled enough).

Anyway, metaphors and such - Don't gatekeep your work trying to be intellectual. Reading, especially fanfic, is there to be enjoyed by everyone, so as a writer just keep it simple.

Step 4! Editing!

I personally used ProWritingAid for spelling and grammar checking. Grammarly is also a good one but very pushy in its premium advertising.

I try to avoid using repeat words too often, again see OneLook for alternatives. I also read my fic through on word first checking for errors, then copy and paste to Tumblr where I read again. The font and layout is different, so I can spot more that I might have skimmed over the first time. If I want to be sure, then I might go out for a few hours and then read through again later and will surely find something. If you want to be really sure, find a beta reader (I personally don't because I can't handle the critique unless I know the other person is very skilled and trustworthy, even then it's my work, not theirs.) Congratulations, you have just written a fanfiction!

Share it on Tumblr, share it on Ao3 (or your chosen site), get depressed when it does not get the traction you want. This is the writer's way.

I hope this helps at least one person to join the fanfic writing community. Honestly, just write and be creative. Don't doubt yourself, don't think you're not good enough, just put words on paper and go for it. There is a reader out there for every writer. You just have to find each other.

#bg3 fanfiction #writing advice #long post #bg3 gale

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mediocre-quill-ink · 1 year

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Sarcasm

Gavin × reader enemies to lovers pt 1

Content: lots of swearing, two (2) furby references, a little violence, gender neutral pronouns, but use of "good girl" in one part. Connor is readers' best friend, reader is also a hot head, cringe come backs, I don't know how police work works.

Gavins fucking smirk

A shit eating grin spread across Gavins face as he laughed about whatever he and his friend were talking about, whatever it was it was funny enough for gavin to slam his hand against the table a couple of times too. God can he be quiet for one fucking second?

My jaw clenched looking at him.

Gavin fucking Reed. The office shit head. Honestly, what can't I say about him. Loud, rude, perverted, and generally just safety hazard. He walks around like he owns the fucking place and dosnt give two shits about people. Partners coming and going like a rotating door, I can only imagine why.

His friend, I often forget her name, gives him a smile before what looks like warm goodbyes followed by her walking out of the break room. I've never really gotten to know her. At first glance, she looks like a decent person, maybe even someone I'd hang out with, but if she's such chums with Gavin, then I can't imagine how she must be like. As his smile faded, he took a final sip of coffee, paper cup crushing in his hand shortly after before he finally tries to throw the trash in the metal garbage basket. He misses.

I couldn't help but let a snicker slip between my lips. he suddenly turned his attention to me, eyes narrowing. His expression hardens almost immediately as he walks over to pick up the crumpled up paper coffee cup and drop it in the trash. "Fucking great shot." I whispered to myself, suppressing a smile as I looked back at my work, trying to focus on the case in front of me.

The computer displayed a file about a recent robbery, a man decided to rob his friends home because he didn't pay him back. Not only did he break and enter to get his money back, but he stole various other items from the house. Mostly items of value like jewelry but also strange random stuff like packs of gum and a furby? In all honesty, I couldn't blame him, but it was strange non the less.

I pulled out my note pad, jotting down important details, occasionally throwing in my own theories for motivation.

My pencil skid across the paper as something heavy bumped into my desk. I quickly looked up to be met with narrow brown eyes "y/n." Gavin spat. "Reed." I shot back

He pressed his palm onto my desk, trying to take a more relaxed pose, though he still looked ridged. "wanna tell me what you were laughing at?" He demanded rather than questioned. A small smile cracked on my face again, thinking about it. I quickly forced it to disappear. "Oh, nothing. you're a star shooter, maybe even have a chance on the NBA. Though... you would have to be a bit taller." I quipped, the smile I was suppressing slipping back on my face. The palm that sat relaxed on my desk tightened, fingers flexed in uncomfortable forms. "You think you're so fucking smart-"

"not really. Just better."

His tongue stabbed his cheek, looking around the room with a fake impressed face. "Oh! Oh, you think you're better?" Gavin snickered quietly, looking at whoever was walking by as he spoke."They think they are better than me! Ooo!"

My lip curled in disgust. Absolutely childish. I fought off, rolling my eyes to no success. "Well then, tell me how. How are you better?" I opened my mouth to speak, but then he cut me off. "Go on, tell me. How." My brows frowed for a second before breathing in to speak, and he once again cut me off. "How?" I squinted at him slightly, opening my mouth, and he did it again. "Go on. say something." His eyes held a knowing look, a smile slowly creeping on his face. I just stared at him, jaw clenched, a warm rage shooting through my veans. He nodded slowly. "That's what I thought." He whispered. Tapping my desk, and gave me that fucking. Smile. "Eat shit, Reed." I spat. He clicked his tongue at me and winked. "Aww, love you too." He hummed sarcastically. Finally walking away, stuffing his hands in his jacket pockets.

My head began to sting as a sudden headache washed over me. All the focus I had on my case disappeared, placing my hands on my head, I sucked in a deep breath, the pain taking over my skull. I pulled open a drawer at my desk, looking for my mini bottle of aspirin. Rummaging my hand around, I realized to my dismay that I ran out two weeks ago and I forgot to get a new one. Fuck. I shot a glance at gavins desk, he sat relaxed, scrolling on his phone, feet propped up on his desk, one foot tapping to a nonexistent rythem. The headache grew worse, a small groan escaping my lips.

I flenched as a hand rested on my shoulder. I quickly spun around, in doing so, ripping the hand off me,to see Connor, looking down at me with a soft expression. "Sorry to disturb you, detective l/n. I just came to check on you. I noticed your stress levels were higher than normal, are you alright?" He quirked his head slightly. I let out a low sigh, out of relief and frustration. "Yeah, I just- Gavins being... Gavin." I mumbled. "I think he gave me a fucked head ache, too." Connor nodded, his gaze falling over to Gavins desk. "What did he do this time?" He asked calmly. I groaned at the fresh memory. "He was being an immature brat." Connor hummed in response "ah so nothing new." He shot me a soft smile. I huffed a laugh in response. "Nothing new." I agreed, small smile spending across my lips.

Hours passed, and I finally finished my work, getting ready to leave. I grabbed my things, sliding my phone and other items on my pockets. A sense of relief washed over me when i realized my head ache finally disappeared.

I walked over to Connors desk, and he was already prepared to leave, patiently standing as he waited for Hank to gather his things. "Wanna do anything today, Connor?" I asked, pulling out my phone to look for any local events happening. Connor and I usually hang out every Thursday, something we sorted out once Connor deviated. He said it made him feel more human, and i loved hanging out with him, so who am i to deny him such luxurys. "I was hoping we could go to a bar. I haven't had a drink in a while, and I've been craving a nice cocktail." I offered. "Maybe. I thought it'd be fun to attend a dog show. There's an event happening in an hour just a few miles away." Connor stated.

A smile cracked on my face. "Decisions, decisions." I tisked, slipping my phone back in my pocket. "How about we go to the dog show and then the bar?" I offered. The android nodded in agreement. "we can do that." I nodded back, then turned to Hank. "wanna join us?" Hank shook his head, flicking his hand in dismissal. "No, you kids have fun. I just wanna sit around my house today." I sat my fists on my hips and replied,"Not even for the bar?" At that hank let out an almost frustrated sigh. "I'd love to, but Connor made me promise I'd cut back on drinking."

I glanced over at connor for a moment, who stayed neutral before looking back at Hank. "Huh. Well, I'm proud you're sticking to that, see you later, Hank." I replied, waving to Hank as I started to leave. "I'm only doing it cause connor will never shut up about it. Don't be so proud." He grumbled, patting down his pants for keys. "Mmm hmm, bye hank!" I called again, exiting the department.

Connor sat with perfect posture in the plastic fold out chair next to mine. The auditorium was filled with bustling voices, most excited for the upcoming dog show but behind us I could hear some whispering voices.

"Are they with an android?"

"Do you think they are dating it?"

"Wouldn't surprise me. Everyone's doing it now a days."

"I know, what has humanity come to?"

I tensed at the hushed gossiping behind us, glancing over at connor. He returned a confused look. I shrugged, baffled, not knowing what to say. We weren't dating, never have, and I didn't really have plans to, connor and I were nothing more than good friends, but even if we were, I didn't see the big deal. "Are you alright?" Connor muttered, leaning in slightly. I nodded, glancing around briefly. "I'm fine, are you fine?" He gave a single nod, smiling softly. "I hear enough anti-android speech, I'm fine." My jaw dropped slightly. "That response doesn't comfort me, connor." I breathed. He leaned back into his seat, nodding over to me. "I'm fine. If you want to talk about it, we can do that after the show." I sighed, bringing my attention back to the bordered off center of the gymnasium. A woman appeared with a microphone in her hand, introducing the show.

"Hello everyone ! Welcome to the..."

As she spoke, I replied to connor, "No, it's alright, we don't have to."

"Yes! Thank you!" I groaned, taking a sip from my martini. Connor and I were deep in conversation. "The bull territor should have won! It was so obedient! And so cute! And- and- it's tricks were so well done and timed and ... dude, I'm so mad." Connor nodded in agreement. "I'm very upset as well. Either the bull territor or the corgi." He was leaning against the bar counter, I always felt awkward taking connor to bars and restaurants because he couldn't eat. I often felt rude because of it. I've caught myself offering my own drink or meal to him and then immediately becoming intensely embarrassed.

"The corgi? I mean, she was good, but that husky, rot willer thing was better." Connor shook his head in disagreement "no he wasn't! His routine was sloppy!" My eyes widened."Sloppy?? It was graceful! And adorable!"

Before I could finish my thoughts, a new objective came to mind. I sighed. "I'll be back, I gotta go take a piss." I grumbled. Connor just nodded in response. I quickly hopped off the bar stool, walking past the arrangement of dining tables filled with people eating greasy burgers and dry chicken fingers, squeezing behind patrons playing pool under warm yellow lights. Suddenly, I was knocked back, spinning around. I bumped into someone leaving the men's restroom. Forcing a startled yelp out of me. "Oh my god! I'm sorry, are you okay?" I turned around, disoriented to see a familiar pair of brown eyes staring back at me.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" Gavin asked anger and shock laced into his voice. My eyes widened. No fucking way. "I'd ask you the same thing." He stepped closer to me, tilting his head slightly "I was trying to relax and have a good fucking time until you showed up." I stared at connor, a sudden wave of fear stinging in my chest. I can deal with Gavin on my own, but Connor has told me about the awful shit he's tried on him. I don't want to know what kind of scene Gavin would cause if he knew he was here. He noticed my split attention and followed my gaze, looking at the android, idely sitting on the bar stool with patience. "And you brought the fucking plastic prick? God, I knew you were lonely, but I at least expected you to hire a hooker or something, not bring the human shaped furby."

My blood turned to fire, fist clenching tight to my thigh. "Reed, you're so noxious, not even a furby could talk to you, and they are one of the most basic robotic toys." He rolled his eyes. "That's the best you could come up with?" He hissed, almost smiling. "I don't need to be clever when you're the biggest joke in the whole bar." At that, his face went red, he snached my wrist, pulling me so close I could feel his breath on my face, he smelled of cigarettes. "Got any more little quips?" His grip was tight around my wrist, eyes boring into me.

My breath began to shake. He was always a ball of rage, but this was the first time he got physical with me. I swallowed hard, trying to keep my courage. He simply hummed, a pleased smile spreading across his face. "That's right, quiet." He lulled. A sudden warmth spread across his cheeks, my heart skipping a beat. He was so close, so warm... No. No! I can't think that shit about Gavin. He's Gavin fucking reed!

His messy hair hung over his face slightly, framing his features in a way I never really observed. His eyes as intimidating as they were were also gorgeous, hot coffee colors burning holes in my face. His lips were... Was he kind of... handsome?

My vision went white

My hand stung with sudden force. As I opened my eyes, vision clear, I just realized I slapped him. His face will plastered with shock, a red mark quickly appearing on his cheek. The outline of my hand singed into his stubbled face. Once I realized what I've done, Gavins' expression started to change. What ever shock he had melted away into something more unsettling. His brows arched, nose crinkled, teeth slightly bared. "You bastard!" He quickly realed back his arm and I braced for impact, moving my hands up to cover my face.

And waited

The impact never came. I opened my eyes to see Connor standing next to gavin now, a firm grip on his wrist. Gavins hand was curled into a fist. "I would advise you dont do that." Connor stated firmly, his expression hardened.

Gavins jaw clenched, nostrils flaired and used his other arm to sock Connor in his stomach. Connor flenched, wavering slightly as his knees buckled. Not falling, but his stance was no longer ferm enough to hold onto Gavin.

He quickly snapped back to me, grabbing me by the collar of my shirt and yanking me twords him. His breath was hot against my skin. "Get. out." Was all he stated. My breath began to tremble, and he shoved me back with force, pointing at the door. "And take that aluminum peice of shit with you!" I could feel myself shaking. Not just from fear but from rage. I clenched my fist, taking in deep breaths, and walked over to connor, grabbing his arm. "Come on, the human sewage is starting to make me nauseous."

I could feel all eyes on me as i dragged connor out of the restaurant, whispers and mutters, filling the air. a wave of heat washed over me, embarrassment pricking at my neck. Among the eyes and disembodied voices, one set stuck out to me. An almost burning sensation on the back of my head, I knew it was Gavin watching with pride as I ran away. Running away like I always do. Why can I never finish the fight? A single voice, though the muddied whispers, stuck out to me. "That's right, walk away like a good girl."

Connor, now caught up with my pace, pushed open the glass door in front of us. I could feel my face turn warm from rage. I wanted to turn around and sprint at Gavin and knock his teeth out with full force. But Connor simply tugged at my arm, swaying me enough to follow him out the bar.

I stepped out, a mix of shame, rage, and a new sense of... aroused confusion all pummeling at my stomach. As I turned around, looking into the restaurant for a final time and all the way in the back I could see gavin standing with his arms crossed, wearing that fucking smirk.

Pt 2

#dbh #detroit become human #dbh gavin #gavin reed #gavin reed x reader #gavin reed x oc #gavin reed enimes to lovers #enimes to lovers #dbh fanfiction #gavin x reader dbh

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