#theres a small chance i could save it but i dont really have my hopes up
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sidesteppostinghours · 1 month ago
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ok. question.
ortega ended up hallucinating sidestep after they "died", but sidestep doesnt know about that. they know it got bad, but never the full extent of how their death affected them. so if your sidestep Did learn, if they found out ortega looked for them in every little piece they could, would that change anything for your sidesteps? would their relationship with ortega be any different?
#pulp speaks#Am i thinking of my “ortega sees sidestep posthb” fic again? perhaps#shameless plug btw yall should read it its called 'seen' on ao3 and i still like it#but anyway the important bits: ive been thinking about it with my sidesteps and its really interesting to me how different they are#but theyre all some variation of “i didnt know you /cared/”#caine is. uncomfortable with the idea#i genuinely dont know why but i do know that in the end their feelings on the matter are “whats done is done and im back now” with a small#“ill try not to leave again” mixed in#meanwhile cyrus is a deer in headlights over it#itd be way worse if he learned it when they met again- i feel like if he learned ortega was still that attached he wouldve left and never-#-come back. he would still want to Now but hes too tangled in his relationships and ortega is his /friend/ and leaving would just explode i#-his face‚ god Damnit ortega you son of a bitch‚ he shouldve just run. you werent supposed to drag him into caring about people again.#cecilia would have mixed feelings about it. i think shed resonate with it a lot for reasons she doesnt want to face#but it would also hit her like a goddamn Truck that he chose to move on/replace her rather than try get her back and its easier to get mad-#-about that than question her own feelings. but also maybe she could use this to her advantage? maybe this time he knows theres always a-#-chance hell come back for her next time. maybe. shes hoping there wont be a next time.#cynthias an interesting case because shes in love with ortega. deeply. but ortega /never came for her/ when she /promised/ and cynthia-#-is still furious about it#ortega hallucinated her in death but she couldnt put the pieces together and go looking herself? she cared enough to look for her but-#-not enough to save her?#she would still end up settling on bitterness for abandoning her but the information would shake her to her core#anyway. i think ortega should be used as a squeaky toy 👍#caine lynzal#cyrus becker#cecilia rider#cynthia garcia#ortega#sidestep#fhr
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socalspacecadet · 2 months ago
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feeling really mournful over the files i lost when my computer died. all the stuff from the past year-- some of the best and coolest and most important art i've ever made-- is gone. a lot of them are on the internet but it's not the same
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soulsfractured · 3 months ago
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23 for Yazoo
16 for Tseng
12 for Kuja
3, 4 for All Listed Muses, not just the three picked above
Random Character Asks
THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME A CHANCE TO TALK ABOUT ALL MY BABIES. I LOVE THEM ALL SO MUCH. I really need to write more with everyone at some point, once I get back into the swing of writing again.
It's a bit long so everyones answers are under the cut!
Cyril
3 - Wears glasses because he can't wear contacts they bug his eyes too much. Still wishes he could though because he'd look more like Genesis that way.
4 - "If it could help my dad come back faster? I'm willing to give it a shot. So long as no one gets hurt from it, because then I won't do it."
YOU WANNA SEE ME CRY. Cyril put all his focus into biological sciences bc he wants to help Genesis in every way possible. He just wants to live a quiet life with his dad please let him have this--
Kuja
3 - Absolutely wears a packer, and had his codpiece custom made to fit it. Has thrown it at someone before, will throw it again.
4 - "Peace is but a shadow of death, desperate to forget its painful past... Though we hope for promising years. After shedding a thousand tears, yesterday's sorrow constantly nears. And while the moon still shines blue, by dawn, it will turn to scarlet hue."
Its in there, it's one of my favourites coming from someone who doesn't think he can die. Really makes me wonder if he had suspicions about it, but Garland gaslit him into ignoring those thoughts.
12 - Absolutely has tried to dye his hair and his tail once. It went horribly and he couldn't get all the dye out. It was all a faded blueish colour for weeks
Luneth
3 - His hair is always in his face because he enjoys playing with it/having others play with it. But, he doesn't enjoy it against his neck at the same time so, ponytail. Not really practical, but that's not important.
4 - "Slacking off saved her from the curse, so maybe that 'luck' might rub off on us!"
I cant explain why this one sticks out to me, but Luneth and the rest of the party actually acting like kids and joking around is really sweet? Idk I guess I love that theres a bunch of moments we can see them enjoying their journey and not just be silent strong protagonists.
Sephiroth
3 - Literal cat eyes. They glow, his pupils shrink and widen with mood. He has cat eyes.
4 - "We'll meet again soon."
Just Sephiroth and Zack talking in that entire scene. The small smile when Zack says "I'll hold you to that" the notice that Zack wanted to say something before he left. It's one of my favourite CC Sephiroth moments.
Tseng
3 - Really enjoys wearing longer socks. Knee or thigh high are preferable, and 90% of them are just black. He organizes them so he doesnt grab two different lengths (which has happened a few times before)
4 - "There is nothing more precious than a human life"
It's SUCH a development for me to see Tseng say this. Consider all that he does, and all that he has done. He may commit atrocious deeds for Shinra, but he's failed missions to help random Shinra employees before, he's put himself at risk to protect others.
16 - Tseng's darkest secret that he won't admit is that he absolutely hates Shinra. Without a doubt he does wonder what life would have been like if he stayed in Wutai. Would he have stayed at the Temple? Would he had left anyways? What if what if what if. He will not admit this thought crosses his mind and tries to tell himself it's just hypothetical. But it's a thought that does come up more often just before Rufus becomes president.
Vincent
3 - Refuses to cut his hair. Even a trim it takes a long time to convince him. He's not gonna die anytime soon so whose gonna see the mess it becomes anyways. But he still takes pretty good care of it- mostly
4 - "I don't care what you are doing, so much as the idiotic way that you are doing it."
The tired dad quote of the year bc god dammit the party is a bunch if teenagers and their old man needs a fuckin nap so he can stop telling them dont put that in your mouth
Yazoo
3 - Vegetarian. He just doesnt like meat- usually he just takes whatever meat he gets on food and pushes it to the side or gives it to his brothers. He has picked a burger apart to take the patty out and just eaten it like that, just sides and bun.
4 - "I will not have you refer to Mother that way!"
One of the VERY few times that Yazoo actually shows emotions??? P l e a s e. I love him so much and actually getting to see that cool exterior crack is so interesting.
23 - As a candle Yazoo would be a more woodsy kind of scent. Damp earth, firewood, stagnant waters. There's a slight spice mixed in as well, like a faint hint of cinnamon.
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diablademon · 1 year ago
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(Im on phone so sorry if this is hard to follow/read)
My thoughts is that Luffy and Crocodile are on natural ground.
As in pirate natural ground. Could be enemy, could be ally but wont act on anything and just suspiciously side eye eachother to figure out the others motive.
Well atleast on Luffys pov.
Luffy very much love Vivi and Crocodile hurt her greatly, but he also helped ace and luffy in the war so probably still hate Crocodile over Alabasta but wont go for the throat if he meets crocodile again if you understand me.
Maybe he didnt really comment on Crocodile in the poster because Crocodile has gone back to be bit of a nobody to Luffy.
On Crocodile side we seen that he seem happy with Luffys news in the pappers.
I dont think he would act all bubbly if they meet again. But wont be at all hostile.
But I think Crocodile likes Luffy now more than Luffy likes Crocodile.
Its also funny that Luffy ruined Crocodiles plans, beat him up, had his affairs out in the open and getting arrested where he got boiled alive.
But meeting Luffy again he just go "water under the bridge". Literally no hatred.
And then theres Buggy that owned him money and Crocodile was ready to murder him over it.
I will lean on Luffy not knowing that Crocodile saved him at the end of the war.
Hes not one to ask about the past and only knew about Law saving him because he woke up on his ship.
I hope we get the backstory of Crocodile.
When we first meet him in Alabasta he trusted no one. Robin was the closest to him but he knew nothing about her and didnt want to know anything about her.
He would kill his best agents over small mistakes and would enjoy giving his enemies a slow death.
After being defeated he stopped caring, he didnt want to go with Ms. Goldenweek when she came to rescue everyone and rather went to Impel Down.
Getting Pluton seemed to be his last chance for something. After that failed he went numb about the world.
The idea of taking down Whitebeard was the only thing that made him want to get out again.
And that mission he suddenly abandoned to protect Ace and Luffy.
After the war he kept Daz Bones close, teamed up with Mihawk and got happy everytime there where news about Luffy.
Something made Crocodile care. And my question is what made him not care in the first place?
If we bring in crocomom/crocodad theory into this then I think Crocodile didnt have a say in the hiding of Luffy. Maybe he didnt even knew he was still alive.
So while Dragon wanted to fight for a better world that his son could live in, Crocodile become resentful and angry about the world and want to see it burn.
Crocodile is an entertaining villian and its hard to not wanting him succeed in what ever he is trying to do now.
When the strawhats meet Crocodile again I cant see it go out that well.
Robin still sees Crocodile as one of the worst enemies of her past. So she would not be happy meeting him again. Maybe even horrified.
Jinbie might be the one thats more positive about Crocodile because of Crocodiles last act in the war. But he did try to kill Whitebeard and it seemed like the other warlords was told of why Crocodile was arrested and had his warlord title taken away. So maybe not too positive about Crocodile.
But he would probably tell everyone that he and Luffy only survived the war because Crocodile got between them and Akainu.
The Strawhats that was at Alabasta would definitely be aggressive if Luffy doesnt tell them off or Jinbie mentioned them being saved by him.
The rest will just follow everyone else lead as they have no idea who Crocodile is exept a ex-warlord
(also about Robins crimes getting brushed under the rug is probably because we didnt really see her personally do anything against civilans and just against baroque works agents. And was just working for Crocodile to survive (as he seemed to be only one not selling her out to the marines)and trying to keep Oharas research alive.)
The worst part about trying to figure out what Crocodile's deal is that because he's so fucking irredeemably evil in Alabasta... Like... Yeah he's just irredeemably evil. Like I love him but he did cause countless casualties, a ton of pain and suffering and literally attempted to blow up a million people
Like no amount of theoretical "trying to do it to save his son from the Government" or "trying to stop the Government from hurting anyone else" or just "doing it for the greater good" is going to make him any less of a mass murderer
But also Robin absolutely 100% helped with all of that shit simply because she wanted to read the Poneglyph for herself.
No amount of her intending to betray Crocodile from the begining and sabotaging his plans erases the fact that Robin also caused countless people to starve to death and die in the civil war. Her sabotages only succeeded out of sheer luck, and only spared the lives of the people at the final battle. She has the blood of countless innocents on her hands. Because she wanted to read history.
But her crimes were swept under the rug because she has a sad backstory and her sabotages worked out just at the nick of time by sheer dumb luck
So Croc??? Just??? Is there a chance??? At all???
But also he did literally intend to sell Buggy into slavery
Like, fuck Buggy, but jesus
What's also killing me is that we like. Don't know what Luffy thinks of Crocodile right now. Which really is like. The thing that will decide how we, as the readers, are supposed to feel about Crocodile. Luffy is our POV
Like we don't know what Luffy's opinion of Crocodile is after he helped save Luffy (and spared Ace once) during the Summit War. Like Luffy clearly fucking hated the man in Impel Down and the two interactions they had during the War weren't like positive (in the sense that Luffy himself didn't think of the interactions as particularly positive. Defending Whitebeard from being attacked once and then being like "wait what HIM?!" when Crocodile defended Ace. To be fair, in the midst of the chaos, there wasn't much time to spend on Pondering On Such Things because Ace needed to be saved, and Oda goes out of his way to not show us what's going on inside Luffy's head, because it's all meant to be out in the open anyways. Regardless, these weren't like "yay it's Crocodile! :)" moments for Luffy is what I mean)
But also Luffy was very grateful of Law for saving his life and was willing to put his trust into Law for their alliance- of course, they weren't explicitly enemies to begin with, rivals at most, but still. Luffy respects those who help him.
But also Luffy grew during the timeskip. Like he's not that clueless anymore (like he finally understands Hancock is in love with him etc), and similarly Luffy gets that Buggy is an absolute loser now. But also Buggy did also help save Luffy's life (even if it was by accident), and while IDK if Luffy is aware of that, I don't think that helped improve Luffy's impression of Buggy
So like. The fuck does Luffy think of Crocodile, at this moment? Even with the Cross Guild reveal, he didn't even really comment on Croc and just focused his energy on being confused about Buggy being "the leader" of CG. IDK it feels almost intentional or something, that we don't know what Luffy thinks?? Especially since we did get Zoro's opinion on Mihawk in the situation?? Or am I delulu?? (Sidenote. I'd love to know what Robin would have to say about Crocodile helping save Luffy's life. What Jinbei might think of the final words Crocodile left him with before blasting them out of Akainu's reach. But mainly just Robin's thoughts)
Like IDK my best guess would be that Luffy still hates Crocodile just the same but is like grossed out by technically owing him one??? In the classic
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-kinda way, you know? And that he'd be just kinda confused about it?
Because I can't fucking imagine Luffy being like "oh we're cool now" with Crocodile, let alone "Yay Crocodile :) He saved my life!". But also like. Luffy does kind of owe Croc one. Kind of. And Luffy is usually very respectful of that kind of thing. Aaaaaaaa???
(Also does. Does Luffy even know it was Crocodile who yeeted him and Jinbei out of Akainu's reach to begin with. 'Cause he was unconcious. Knocked the fuck out. Does. Does Luffy even know. Did anybody tell him???)
I just.
There's the reasonable part of me that knows Crocodile is an irredeemable evil dickbag and everything he has ever said and done up to the most recent chapters support that. He is too far gone.
And then there's the absolutely delulu part that loves a tragic villian who gets a heartwrenching redemption that's looking for any fucking sign that could indicate Crocodile could maybe be one
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prettyvampiress96 · 3 years ago
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The Malfoy Secret - Chapter 4
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Excitement buzzed through the halls of Malfoy manor, with Draco home on break, Lucius and Anastasia had been invited by Cornelius Fudge himself to the Quidditch World Cup . Bulgaria VS Ireland. Of course once Draco had heard the news it became a family outing. Draco was thrilled Anna was tagging along. "Draco darling just because your home from school , does not mean anna can shy away from her work. Your father and Anna will have reputation's to uphold as do we?" Narcissa warned him yet again. " But mother that's barbaric, Anna is my friend . Mine and I want her to watch the match with me" Draco whined turning on his heels to pout up at Anna. Lucius , Narcissa and Anastasia all shared a look to each other which Draco completely missed. Keeping this a secret would be that much more difficult yet all the more so exciting.
The Malfoy's and Anastasia apparated to the match and they proceeded to walk through the crowds in order to reach their private box , stopping to greet others along the way. Lucius and Narcissa began walking up the flight of stairs first followed closely behind were Anna and Draco. "Ah here's Lucius now. I'm positive most of you know each other " came the voice of Cornelius Fudge. Anastasia tensed when she laid her eyes on who Cornelius was conversing with. The Weasley's. Anna tensed and her jaw locked into place, her hand reaching towards her wand. After her last run in with Percy, Anna was certainly taking no chances. Draco noticed the change in Anna and turned looking confused at the situation. Anastasia narrowed her eyes completely having zoned out of the conversation , until Arthur Weasley held his hand out towards her . Instead of shaking his hand Anna chose to not take notice. "Anna" Narcissa scolded as if Anna was one of her own. "Oh that's quite alright Narcissa truly, Percy did say some rather unforgiveable things, it's bound to be hard for her to forgive. No hard feelings. Right lets get to our seats shall we?" Arthur said clapping his hands , he began rushing the children up the stairs. Draco took Anna by the hand and proceeded to drag her to their box, very nearly pulling her over . The private box even had a adjoined balcony with slightly more spacious seats than the original. " Look Dray, As spectacular as this view is these shoes are not made for me to be on my feet leaning over a railing for the whole match , so I'm going to fetch a seat by your parents" Anna said her cloak swishing behind her. Spying the two elder Malfoy's seated alone in the back row with a seat saved between them.
Anastasia sidled her way to the spare seat squeezing herself past Narcissa , whose fingers trailed up the smooth skin of Anna's bare leg. The entire arena suddenly erupted into applause and cheers. The Bulgarian team came flying out along with their mascots. Veela's. Veela's were stunningly beautiful creatures capable of entrancing any male in their presence. At the sight of the many Veela's Anastasia eyes Lucius watching his reaction, her hand grasps the top of his thigh squeezing hard. Lucius jumped at the unsuspected contact, his actions gaining the attention of Narcissa. " Oh Darling I do believe our princess wants to play" Narcissa cooed. " Yes it would certainly seem that way. It is rather brave of our babygirl if you ask me. Tell us babygirl is that what you want ? You want us to make you scream our names for everyone to hear ? Does our dirty little princess want an audience to watch her beg ?" Lucius teased , his voice low enough for both women to hear. The effect of his words had Anna squirming in her seat. With her hand still on Lucius's thigh Anna could feel his length hardening beneath her touch, deciding to test the waters ,Anna began slowly undoing the zip . " Don't start something you can't finish baby " Cissa whispered into Anastasia's ear while sliding her hand to cup Annas throbbing heated , panty-less sex . At the discovery of no panties, Cissa was in two minds to whether to take Anna over her knee right there and then or completely fuck her senseless later. Deciding on the latter Narcissa began dragging her index finger through the slick folds of Anastasia's wet folds, reaching the bud of nerves she began rubbing slow circles. Anastasia bit down on her lip in an attempt to keep their cover being blown. With Lucius's erect shaft free from its clothed prison, Anna wrapped her hand around the base. Anastasia moved her hand up to the red swollen tip swiping her thumb across the tip spreading the glistening pre-cum over her thumb. Anna made eye contact with Lucius as she popped the cum covered thumb into her mouth humming in approval at the salty taste it provided. Lucius stared in disbelief at his little princess's bold action. Leaning to her slightly Lucius whispered.
" You do that again princess and I'll take it upon myself to personally destroy the beautifully tight cunt of yours and mummy wont be able to save you" Lucius smirked with a glint in his eye. " You promise daddy" Anna whispered back.
Anastasia felt a rush of adrenaline surge through her , whether that was due to him or to the fact Cissa was still launching her attack on anna's clit she didnt know neither did she care. Anna's hand picked up the pace around Lucius whilst she ground down against Cissa's fingers . Narcissa's fingers curling inside of anna hitting the spot each and every time she thrust , her thumb hitting the bud of nerves driving Anna so close to the edge. The closer she got to her big finish the harder and faster she gripped Lucius. Narcissa felt Anna's walls constrict around her fingers. Cissa removed her fingers from Anna lifting them up for both Anna and Lucius to see Anna's juices dripping from her fingers. "I'd offer you a taste my love but I really dont want to " Cissa smiled warmly at the pair as she cleaned each finger with her tongue one by one making a rather erotic show for the pair. " Fuck Cissa ! I'm so close babygirl I highly suggest taking your hand away before we make a mess " he warned , Anna chose to disregard his warning and continued her ascent, hell bent even to make her daddy feel as good as he makes her. Anna felt Lucius's cock twitch in her hand signalling he was about to cum and boy was she ready for it. Lucius with his eyes momentarily clenched shut, he missed as Anastasia bent her head down, with one last pump on his twitching penis Lucius rode his orgasm out shooting white shots of cum. Surprisingly Anna caught the majority of it in her mouth leaving little to no mess. Anastasia rose back into her seat laughing lightly. Narcissa placed her hand on Anna's thigh. " You did such a splendid job darling and you taste so sweet . Our sweet babygirl " Cissa commented softly. Lucius hummed in agreement. " Indeed she did my love , I must admit it does make me wonder how her lips would feel wrapped around it, perhaps her lips on you too my dear . The possibilities are endless wouldn't you say?" Lucius replied quietly. Anna blushed furiously. In the background the arena erupted in to applause. Draco and his friends turned from the railings and ran approaching Anna and his parents. "They lost , the Bulgarians lost by 10 points 10 freaking points. What a match though Anna? " Draco asked. "Oh yes It was definitely quite the match. Had me on the edge of my seat the entire game" Anastasia enthused back. Draco looked pleased at her response. " Oh father , mother Blaise invited me and the others to go back to his tent for a while , Would that be alright with you" Draco asked them politely his hands clasped in front of him. "Yes Draco that's fine by us , you know where our tent is should you need something. Be safe" Lucius allowed , secretly happy that Draco would be elsewhere giving him and Cissa time with their babygirl. Draco fist pumped the air in pure excitement. "Anna you want to come I'm sure everyone would love to see you again you are everyone's favourite head girl after all " Draco asked his eyes wide and hopeful. Anna shuffled her weight from foot to foot . " Oh um Draco that's rather kind of you but in fact I'm rather tired . I figured I might just go and get some sleep" she replied scratching her neck at the awkwardness silently praying Draco wouldn't see through her lie. Draco nodded at her response waving and leaving with his friends in tow. With Draco gone , Anastasia, Narcissa and Lucius walked side by side back to the tent . " Are you actually tired little princess or can mummy and I convince you to join us in what I do believe you started earlier this evening?" Lucius asked with every intention of keeping the promise he made her earlier. " Well I suppose theres a chance I could be persuaded" Anna shrugged lightly, spotting their tent she turned to them with a small giggle and took off running . Leaving Lucius and Narcissa to watch in complete awe. Narcissa curled into her husband's side. " My god I love her " Cissa whispered softly . Lucius planted a soft kiss to the temple of Cissa's head smiling at her comment after all he too felt the same way. " Me too my darling me too , let us hurry I do
believe our precious girl would not fare well being kept waiting." Lucius said taking Cissa by the hand and into the tent. As they entered their room of the tent , they both froze in complete and utter shock , the sight of their princess already on their bed completely naked . Her long hair pulled back into the high ponytail that Lucius seemed to adore . Her hands on her knees patiently waiting . " You and mummy kept me waiting daddy, that's not very nice of either of you. I thought I'd have to try and start things all on my own . It wouldn't have been as good as mummy's but you were taking too long" Anna pouted . Narcissa felt instantly guilty , Lucius however was plagued with the image of his babygirl on the bed pleasuring herself without them. That thought being more than he could take , he strode over to a pouting Anna turning her by the cheekbones to look at him. " Oh Is that so little one ? You would start without us ?Really, is that so?" he taunted her. Anastasia looked from him to Narcissa who watched on with an arched brow, embracing in the confidence their princess had today. Lucius didnt like the attention shifted from him and pulled her back to look at him by her ponytail. " Touch yourself princess I dare you and I'll take you over my knee and give you the spanking of my dreams. Only mummy and daddy get to fuck you with our fingers. Wouldn't you agree darling?" Lucius asked pulling Anna to stand in his arms turning them to look at Cissa who had also now gotten rid of her clothes. " Oh I absolutely agree my dear of course unless we tell her otherwise" she caressed Lucius's cheek placing a kiss to the corner of his lips , leaning over Anna's head in the process. Narcissa then stood looking Anna dead in the eyes. " Although I might add that I will spank you myself should you ever leave the house without panties on again my baby" Cissa warned , Anna silently cursed in her head. Lucius's arms tightened around her bare waist placing her down on the bed with Narcissa close behind , their hands roaming over Anna . Lucius let his left hand cup her cheek while his right hand gently held her throat. " No panties ? Really ? In that case perhaps a punishment is needed hmmm?" Lucius thought out loud to Narcissa. Anastasia gasped at the sudden surge of pleasure rushing through her just from his hand on her throat . Before he could apply pressure , loud noises of explosions and screaming interrupted. Leaping up Anna and Narcissa quickly dressed using magic while Lucius went to see exactly what the commotion is. When he returned , he had a panic stricken look on his face. "Death eaters we need to leave" Lucius said sternly. He knew all too well the damage they were capable of. Narcissa's hands flew to her mouth. " DRACO" Anastasia and Narcissa shouted together. Anna wasted no time hurrying out of the tent with her wand drawn ignoring the shouts and cries of Lucius and Narcissa behind her. Curses were being thrown from every direction. Anastasia spots Blaise and his friends leaving but no Draco. " BLAISE , where is Draco ? He was with you" Anna asked frantically .Blaise nodded. "He was until they started attacking , we got split the last I saw he was by my tent" Anna didnt wait to listen the rest. Running as best she could in a dress and heels, Anna began calling Draco over and over until she saw him . Draco was doing his utmost best to defend himself against three Death Eaters. He was doing so well until he tripped over an abandoned backpack. "Stupefy" Anna cast knocking the death eaters back, Anna helped Draco to his feet keeping him tucked behind her back. She now stood facing the Death Eaters. " Protego" Anna shouted blocking their attacks. "SECTUMSEMPRA" Anastasia cast leaving two of the three Death Eaters bleeding to death on the floor. A flash of green hit the third . The Killing Curse. It was an unforgiveable spell. Lucius and Narcissa appeared from behind Anna and Draco , grabbing onto them , they apparated back to Malfoy Manor. Draco broke into sobs at how close he came to death. Narcissa rushed to him
cradling him like the child he was. Narcissa took Draco upstairs and let him talk his way through what happened before they found him. Upon hearing Draco's side of things, Narcissa would be forever in debt to Anna for saving him the way she did. Meanwhile in the master bedroom Lucius pulled Anastasia into him , needing to hold her in his embrace. Never had he felt the amount of fear and panic that he had when he saw her trying to defend herself and Draco against three ruthless Death Eaters. Tomorrow he would absolutely scold her so bad but for tonight both her and his son remained in one piece . No physical damage. " Princess you have no idea how relieved I am that your not harmed . Myself and Cissa can never lose you babygirl. We need you" Lucius almost cried into her hair. A single tear rolling down his face. Narcissa entered the room. " He's okay he's sleeping poor boy is shaken though, We owe you a thousand thank yous darling , without you I fear our Draco may not be here tonight so thank you our beautiful Anna . Now we've had enough for one night wouldn't you say ? How about a bath and some much needed cuddles in bed hmm?" Cissa suggested. Anastasia and Lucius nodded in agreement. All three of them now submerged in a bubble bath both Narcissa and Lucius refused to let go of Anna's hand . The events of tonight really shook everyone to their core. Narcissa offered to wash Anna's hair while Lucius just wanted to hold her a little longer. After they were all bathed and ready for bed Anna had yet to climb in with them instead hesitating by the door. " Darling girl are you not coming in with us? Is something wrong?" Narcissa asks panicked at the possibility Anna could have seriously hurt herself. " No nothing is wrong it's just with Draco home shouldn't I be in my guest room?" Anna asked looking to the floor. When Draco was usually home Anna usually stayed in a guest room down the hall to keep their secret. " Darling come and cuddle with us for a while, we all need it , I can carry you to bed later princess" Lucius persuaded. Anna didn't need to be asked twice . She jumped straight up onto the bed crawling into Lucius's open arms, Anna settled down and held hers open for Cissa to crawl into. Lucius began playing with Anna's hair twirling it around his fingers. Kissing the crown of his head as he twirled each piece. Anna wrapped her arms around Narcissa holding her against her chest. Something about being stuck between the two made Anna feel safe, the safest she had ever felt. " I love you Lucius and I love you Narcissa "Anastasia said sleepily, her eyes fighting to stay open. Lucius and Narcissa both tensed at those words. The first time their Anastasia had said that she loved them and with their names well it just melted them both. " We love you too darling so much " Narcissa whispered gently moving to kiss her forehead , catching the smile on her face from her words brought tears to Cissa's eyes again. Anna drifted peacefully to sleep surrounded in a loving embrace .
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kaz11283 · 4 years ago
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I really like the prompt list you reblogged it’s got some good stuff. What about 37. “Because I love you god damn it!” with Loki if you are still needing inspiration.
37) Because I Love You God Damn It!
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The Secret Is Out
Characters: the Avengers Bunch, Loki, Thor, Clint
Warnings: Dirty words, slight angst
Summary: after putting your life in the line for a teammate you accidentally let a big secret slip.
Announcements: I will always need insperation and requests! They feed my soul! Haha. I'm not gonna lie. Im skipping back and forth on my requests though. I have a really good story line for one but its just so emotional(thats were Im hoping it goes at least) that I didnt want to write it tonight and put my self in a mood. So instead I guess im goimg with a form of anger? Meh. Anyways... I absolutly love love love everything from you guys! The reblogs, likes, and comments are amazing and I am very greatful for all the love I am getting!!!! 💚💚💚💚💚
Loki Masterlist
~~~~
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The fight had been rough but not as rough as you were feeling in the moment. You had gotten serverly hurt and had been in the medbay for about a week now and you had a longer road ahead. There had been an explosion and instead of turning to run away you had ran toward one of your team members that had been to distracted to realize what was going on, you had successfully gotten him shoved out of the way but you had taken the brunt of the blast.
Now you were laying here staring at the celing trying to stay distracted as Bruce and Tony looked at your completely shaddered knee and the burns up your leg. Fingers crossed that they would have good news soon.
"Well as of right now kid your out of commission." Tony said helping you sit back up.
"Meaning?" You pulled one of the pillows down so that you could sit up without being uncomfortable.
"Meaning right now, the way it all looks, your gonna be stuck in the bed until it fully heals and after wards theres really no way to tell if your going to be able to work in the field again." Burce said looking at the xrays again. "And your gonna have to have surgery in order to put all the right pieces back in the right places, but we cant really do that until some of the burns heal or at least start to heal. Its gonna be a long drawn out process unfortunately." He sighed setting the charts back down and walking over to you.
"Fucking hell! You mean I'm gonna be pushing paper work? I might as well go work in a damn office with four white walls and a poster that says 'hang in there, its almost Friday'." You placed your head in your hands.
"Hey! At least our paper work is more exciting than just running numbers." Tony said placing a hand on your back. He had been like a fsther to you, taking you in when you didnt have anywhere else to turn except the streets. Your own family had abandoned you at a young age and you had been leaning toward a dark path until Tony. "Besides with your expertise you dont have to sit behind a desk, your fingers arent blown off, you can still hack into stuff I'm sure."
"Tony we had a deal when I moved in. No hacking but you would train me and I could actually do good. Now look at me."
"I said no hacking the good guys, and if I remember correctly you were the one jumping close to the bomb not away from. I hate to be this way y/n but the only one to blame is yourself on this one."
"He would have been worst off than I am if not killed. I think I did the right thing. Besides you would have done the same thing if you had been closer." You sighed.
"Honey the diffrence with that is I have a supersuit, you wear a skin tight, spandex one peice, that I'm not a fan of." He laughted. Bruce had went to go get you some more pain killers to shoot into your IV.
"Tony if I were you I would shut up. Your starting to sound like you might actually love me, might even say your starting to act like a dad." You laughed pulling him into a hug.
"Shut it kid, cant let the others know I have a soft spot for the hacker orphan kid i took in all those years ago now can I." He said kissing the top of your head. "Do you need anything else before the drugs kick in and you pass out again?"
"Yes, can you please bring me my phone charger, laptop, and that really fluffy blanket that you and Pep got for me for Christmas."
"Dont ask to much of me now."
"I wouldnt be asking if you would just let me stay in my room. I hate it down here. I wanna be were the people are." You were starting to get loopy from whatever Bruce had given you.
"Ok little mermaid, get some rest I'll get your stuff." He laughed walking out the door letting you fall into a restless sleep.
You didnt know how long you hade been asleep but you woke up with a groan trying to sit up so you could atleast stretch your back from laying in one spot for to long. You flopped back down dramatically with a sigh. You could sense someine else in the room with you, you always knew when he was around.
"You dont have to hide in the shadows Loki. Your more than welcome to keep me company, you should know that by now." You smiled as the prince walked over and sat in the chair beside you. You could tell he hadnt been sleeping, his hair was fixed as always but his clothes looked worst for wear. He had on a plain black shirt and a pair of gray sweat pants, both of with had wrinkles in them either from tossing and turning or from not being changed in a few days.
"Whats wrong? And dont pull that 'nothing is wrong dear. I'm absolutly fine.' Bullshit. You look horrible." You reatched out to grab his hand. What you and Loki had was diffrent. You didnt just see his as a friend, he didnt just see you as that either though. You had spent many nights sitting up with the silver tounge man many nights laying on the couch watching movies, reading, talking about each of your pasts. He knew more about you than even Tony did.
"I'm still currently trying to wrap my head around why you pushed me out of the way and took the blow when you had a chance of dying from it. You shouldnt have been so thick headed my dear." He took your hand and raised it to his lips kissing the top of your hand.
"Loki." You sighed rolling your head to look back up at the celing. "You would have been hurt alot wordt than I am now, that blast could have killed you."
"I am a god y/n, that blast wouldnt have caused me nearly as much damage as it did you." His voice raised slightly.
"Thats what you think. You think that because you are "immortal" that you can take anything thats thrown at you. That no one really cares about you, that you wouldnt be missed? So why not try to take a blow from a bomb? My god your so stupid sometimes."
"I know I can. Norns y/n I've jumped into space, been brain washed, tried to take over New York, gotten smashed around by the Hulk. I was raised with Thor, he doesnt really go easy on a person. What I'm saying is I dont understand why you, a mear midguardian, would sacrifice themselves for me. If anything would have happened-"
"Nothing did happen though. I'm fine-"
"You have steel sticking from your leg, theres no telling when or even if you'll be able to walk again, and there are highly server burns that will leave scares. You cannot sit there and tell me that you are fine."
"Your right it does suck that I'm jot gonna be able to pull off shorts or a bikini anymore."
"This isnt a joke y/n. You almost died!" He finally yelled.
"And i would do it a thousand times over if that ment saving your damn ass again!" You shouted back.
"Why though?! Why me y/n? I've done horrible things, killed people! My life is meaningless." Tears had sprang to his eyes as he looked away.
"Because I love you God damn it!" You stopped suddenly your jaw dropping at the admission that you hadnt ment for him to hear. His head jerked back to you.
"What?" Shock was all over his face as he stood to walk closer to you. "What did you just say?"
"Because I love you Loki Odinson. Because if you were to die I dont think I would be able to go on living. Because even if you see all the bad things that you've done I can look pass that amd see all the good that you are doing." You reached up placing a hand on his cheek and wiping away a tear.
"I love you too y/n. I have since the day I met you. The girl that didnt care what anyone said when she spent time with me. The girl that can see through every face i put on. I love you so much darling." He placed his hand on your face and leaning down gently kissing your lips.
It felt like you thought it always should you felt electricity run through your body and the two of you connected. It was like getting a breath after not being able to for so long. He pulled away smiling at you.
"What do we tell the others?" He asked laying on with bed with you being easy with your leg. He placed his arm around your middle and pulled you as close as he could.
"I honestly dont care what we tell them. They can figure it out themseves for all I care." You smiled lacing your fingers with his, you yawned placing your head on his shoulder closing your eyes.
"Sleep now my Dove, I will be here when you wake." He felt your gentle breath slow as you fell asleep, the rhythm you of your breath lulling him into his own sleep.
Tony and Bruce walked in the next morning stopping dead at the sight in front of them. You and Loki were still cuddled on the small bed sleeping peacefully.
"Should we wake them up?" Bruce asked looking at Tony.
"Na, let them sleep. Dont want to let them know that we know." Tony saod grabbing Bruce's arm and turning to walk back out of the door.
~~~~
Tag List:
@kgirardin
@sophlubbwriting
@supbeeches
@high-functioning-lokipath
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gnarf · 4 years ago
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Gnarf’s 2020
and what a fucking year that was... Anyways, let’s talk about the good things, shall we?
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I made it through 2020 alive and without going insane! Yay! So lets see what else I did. (This is a long post)
In the beginning of 2020 I said I won’t participate in many fests. Only three or something like that. Lets check how that went!
Fests Gnarf participated in: 9
@lockdownfest @lcdrarry @hd-wireless @hpfluff-fest @hd-hurtfest @hd-fan-fair @hd-erised @gameofdrarry in drarropoly @wireless-festive-minifest​
Haha yup, three. Sounds legit. I also wandered off to try if I can art! No worries, I gave that up :D Mad respect to all Artists, arting is exhausting and the progress is too slow for me.
If you really want to check out my attempts, here’s what made its way onto AO3:
Dont Blink! for LCDrarry, it includes the Angels from Doctor Who and was a pain in the arse.
If you knew... was made for H/D Wireless and has the armiest arm i ever saw, very proud of that one. Its also the last thing I made.
Home Sweet Home was also made for H/D Wireless, and the first bigger art piece I tried my hand on.
A muffled groan which is rather explicit and I entirely forgot about making it :D it has a ficlet going with it too.
(I think theres other Art stuff here with the tag #gnarf draws or something)
I reached my yearly goal of writing 100k words once again!
Fics and Ficlets I wrote this year: 20(ish)
Better Side of the Bed (Lock Down Fest, T, 2k)
It was all Malfoy's fault. Harry could be at the Burrow right now, but instead he was trapped in Malfoy's tiny flat. All because that dick couldn't stop bothering him about a stupid life debt he didn't even care about.
Doing What's Best (G, ~800 words)
Lucius looked down at the little bundle currently sleeping in Narcissa's arms and felt terror shoot through his body. A little boy, his hair so white it was nearly invisible. Born only a few hours ago, taking his first breath in the light of the rising sun. Narcissa had whispered a welcome, her eyes wet, her smile bigger than ever. But they both knew, even though temporarily safe, he really wasn't. Draco was born into a world ruled by war. If only it'd end soon.
I better be hallucinating this (T, 3.8k)
After the war Draco Malfoy is sentenced to Azkaban for a really long sentence. Apparently aiding in Dumbledore's death overrules any argument Harry could put up for him. After the trial, as the days pass by, Harry is more and more outraged at the sentence. He can't stop obsessing over the fact that Draco Malfoy saved his life and aided him during the war and is very much capable of redemption. Not to mention that Malfoy has always been a delicate git and would never survive Azkaban. After a few weeks obsessing Harry decides that Malfoy indeed can't remain unjustly in Azkaban and starts to plot a way to break him out of jail and hide him in Grimmauld Place. When Hermione finds out she's not amused. Ron is horrified. Draco still thinks he's hallucinating.
Keep Holding On (Wireless, M. 33.333) A collab with @maesterchill​ who surprised me with lovely art for it!
After the Battle of Hogwarts, Harry and Draco both fall into their own battles with their mental states. Draco is sent to Azkaban, and Harry turns to drinking, hoping to forget. Months later, Harry visits St Mungo’s new ward on the request of a friend, only to find Draco in a deep vegetative state. Not willing to give him up, Harry stays by his side, while simultaneously dealing with the Ministry's newest grand idea to make everything worse. Making new allies, and losing old ones along the way, will hopefully be worth it in the end.
Age is just a number (Fluff Fest, T, 1.5k)
Married for decades, their life is perfect. Until Harry gets a call and hears the following words: "Mr Potter, we caught your husband stealing ten large packs of King Sized condoms."
There was still hope (Hurt Fest, M, 3.1k)
Draco winced as pain shot through his leg with every step. This secret, back-alley laboratory had been his last chance, last hope, to find the potion. But nobody had it in stock, and there was no time left to brew it himself. Panic was slowly overtaking his entire mind as he crept out of the store and back to the nearest alley to Apparate back home. He already felt off, and it was still early in the day. Of course this thestral-shit had to happen to him, of all people. As if life wasn't bad enough for him already.
Desire (E, 1.7k)
"Auror Potter, what a pleasant surprise to meet you here. What can I do for you?" "Stop the show, Malfoy. There's no one around, and I'm not here as an Auror." Draco watched Potter move closer until they were nearly nose to nose, only the small counter of his shop kept Potter at distance. Potter's eyes were dark with something Draco couldn't exactly name, his face was flushed and the air surrounding him felt somehow static. Draco felt the urge to lean further over his counter, to drink in his sight, to touch the man on the other side—but he didn't.
Drarropoly 2020 currently holds 7 ficlets and is in a Series. The highest rating is Mature and its 3.2k in total at this point.
Let's not wait for France (Fan Fair, T, 17.7k)
All Harry had wanted from his Eighth year at Hogwarts was a little peace and a little privacy but, from the moment that he stepped onto Platform 9 3/4, it was obvious that nothing was ever going to be that easy. An accidental bond with Malfoy that resulted in them having to stay together at all times was the final straw. Things couldn't be worse. So much to a quiet year in Hogwarts.
Love letters for the oblivious (Mini Wireless, T, 716 words)
Draco had gotten the strangest letters all week long, which wasn't what anyone needed at Christmas. Especially not him. Either someone was taking the piss, or he had a very dumb and inefficient secret admirer. And Draco didn't know which would be worse.
Double-Booked (Mini Wireless, T, 2.1k)
Finally, peace and quiet, and— "Malfoy?!?" Or the one where Harry thought he could enjoy a quiet Christmas far from everyone, just to find out that the cabin he had booked already accommodated another guest.
The best Christmas he ever had (Mini WirelessT, 1.9k)
Christmas had never been less appealing to him than this year. That was until Arthur Weasley showed up at his door, dressed as Santa, inviting him to the Burrow.
Anon Fests to be added
Whoever made it to this point: yoooo! Friend! Lots of love to you! I also got tagged in many get to know me posts, plenty of love in my Inbox giving me love slaps left and right (honestly, im bruised, stop slapping me), amazing person awards, top 5 fics, and whatever you can think of.
To make up for not answering most of them because I’m a horrible person:
My favourite colour: purple My age: I’ll be 30 next year in April, I expect gifts, I don’t accept first borns My favourite trope: eight year My favourite animal: cat My favourite ice cream: Ben and Jerry’s Cookie Dough Here’s my writing Playlist, it’s the worst you’ll ever see, and yes, I use YouTube, I’m old.
Other things that happened in 2020 that made me happy:
I kicked out my mentally/emotionally abusive partner of 7 years in January
I kept my grandma alive through this *waves hand at world*
I was able to share my birthday cake with my family becaus I got to leave my first quarantine a few days before my birthday
I got to keep my job
I found a lot of lovely friends in this fandom, and got to keep them through this year
My cats are their usual little jerks and actually enjoyed me being at home due to the raging pandemic
I finally cut off my hair
I’m about to hit 3.5k followers here and I love you all
I’m also tagging everyone who sees this and wants to do something similiar! Show us what you did in 2020, the things you’re proud of, and the things you loved! Let’s spread some happy for the end of the year 💜🥰
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glassartpeasants · 4 years ago
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Setsuno finding another girlfriend but worried he'll lose her to another member due to his past?? Soft dom possibly??
Thank you for asking about best boi, look at him, how could you saw no this him? Look at him, look at how god damn beautiful he is. 
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~~~ 
Title: Unworthy
Warnings: Angst, fluff, soft dom, smut, giving this boy the love he deserves.
~~~
8 months ago
Setsuno walked around the dark alleyways trying to clear his mind. 
He couldn’t.
Ever since his lover cheated on him his whole world dropped. He did everything for her and all she did in return was go out with another man. She left him with a broken heart and a mountain of debt. He wanted to end it all. HE couldn’t bear the thought or pain anymore so he wanted to just end it.
Unfortunately life decided to take away his wishes when a hero saved him. His pain would live on and he had nothing to live for until Overhaul came into the picture. 
He gave him a home, some friends, and a reason to continue. Setsuno was forever grateful to the man known as Overhaul. But still there just some things that money and friends can’t fix.
And that was being lonely.
Sure he may have Tabe and Hojo but he wanted someone who he could trust, someone who loved him back in a romantic way. He wanted to feel comfort in someones arms. 
Setsuno found tears streaming from his eyes as his tears hit the cold concrete below his feet. He couldn’t help the weakness in his knees as he fell to the ground. Setsuno hiccuped as more tears plagued his face.
“Sir are you okay!?” He heard a sweet voice as he looked through his teary eyes and saw you. You crouched down to face him as you held his face. your warm touch soothing him. You sat on the ground in front of him and took out a tissue so that you could dry his tears.
“You look like you haven’t slept in days! Please let me take you to my house so i can fix you something to eat at least!” HE searched your eyes to see if you were insincere about your offer, but all he saw was concern and kindness.
“O-okay..” You got up and held out your hand. He grabbed your hand and couldn’t help but realize how soft and delicate your skin felt. He looked up at you and was mesmerized by your angelic appearance. The world seemed to stop for him as he got on his feet. He waited for you to let go of his hand but you never did. You held on to it for dear life rubbing your thumb on his knuckle.
“You look sick and frail should i call you a doctor?” His eyes widened, he can’t let anyone knows he worked for the yakuza.
“No I s-should be okay.” Your eyes still held that look of concern making his stomach do flips. He loved how your (h/c) hair looked like when in the sun. Just from far away as he was he could still smell your vanilla scent.
It overwhelmed his nose as his face felt like it was on fire. HE shivered at your voice as it called out to him,
“Hey i never got your name, mines (l/n) (f/n).” You smiled up at him swinging your arm that connected to his from side to side. The littlest action might have been small to you but to Setsuno it might everything.
“It’s Setsuno Toya.” Your smile grew even wider as he felt your hand squeeze his.
“That’s such a cute name! Wait a second.” You let go of his hand to grab something from your purse. His hand already feeling cold from your warm touch. You grabbed a piece of scratch paper before writing on it with a pen.
Yuo put the pen back in your purse and looked back up at him before handing him the paper.
“It’s my number! I wanna get to know you more! I mean if that’s okay with you..” Now it was you who blushed. You grabbed a strand of hair looking away trying to hide your blush from the man. You won’t deny he gave you such a strong feeling. The need to comfort him. He looked so sad and when you saw him crying your heart felt like breaking. He seemed so quiet and sweet, how could you just let him cry and not help him?
You saw him around a few times before this inicdent. You always wanted to talk to him but he disappeared before you could talk.
“Thanks, i w-wanna get to know you to....” His voice snapped you out of your thoughts. You both were blushing by this point.
Your guys relationship only blossomed after that.
~~~
Present Time
He looked at you from afar as you sat on the couch talking to Rappa. He had dragged you into a conversation that you didn’t even want to be in.
But no matter how much he knew you loved him all his insecurities came back to haunt him once more. What if you liked how strong Rappa was compared to him? Rappa had so much confidence too! That man practically oozed confidence.
Then there was Chrono, he knew that Chrono liked you. Who wouldn’t you were absolutely gorgeous! Your were to oblivious for your own good. How could you not notice the way Chrono looked at you.
Setsuno couldn’t take much more of looking at Rappa flirting with you so he just got up and walked to his room in the compound. Not seeing your worried look that made its way to your face.
~~~
Setsuno laid on his bed with you on his chest. He looked at the clock.
9pm
“You know I’ll never leave you right?” Your sudden words scared him, he thought you were asleep.
“I-I....Its so hard watching everyone flirt with you...I always feel like im unworthy of your love.” He said looking away from you, he didn’t want to show you his tears. 
His body tensed when he felt a pair of soft lips on his neck. Slowly relaxing into your warm body as you climbed on top of him.
You ran your fingers on his clothed chest. He never did like showing his body to you, he’s still so insecure about himself that it hurt you.
You cupped his cheek as you moved your lips to his. It wasn’t rough or fast. It was a slow passionate kiss. You tried pouring all your love into it, showing him that he was the only man for you.
You put one hand on his cheek that slide up to climb through his silky blonde hair as the other rubbed his shoulders. You kiss down along his jaw before reaching his ear, spilling praises to the man under you.
“Your so perfect Toya. I would never leave you. How could i leave someone you i would live for?” You spill more praises into his ear before he wrapped his arms around your chest.
“I love you so much.” He purred into your neck before letting out a yelp as he felt your other hand travel down towards his crotch. Whimpering as you rubbed him from outside his pajama pants.
“Let me show you how much i adore you Setsuno.” You pulled the covers off of your body’s as you scoot down towards his dick. You let out hot puffs of air against his crotch, his body shivered at the stimulation.
“Y-you don’t need to do that if you don’t-” He didn’t finish his sentence before he felt your teeth grazing the base of his cock as you pulled down his pants with your teeth looking at him every step of the way.
You pulled down his pants to his mid thighs before going back to his cock which was semi hard. You begun to kiss the base before running your tongue along the shaft making sure to leave no part untouched.
“(y/n)...ah...” You only smile at him before you take him into your mouth. He arched his back feeling the warm insides of your mouth engulfing him. His hands grip the bed sheets as you work your magic.
You rub his thighs as you take all of him until your nose hits the base of his dick. Your slow pace now moving faster causing Setsuno to curl his toes and let out a groan from his throat. His cock twitching and leaking with precum. You hummed around his cock which was the cherry on top for him.
“(y/n)” You name came out in a breathless moan as his seed painted the inside of your mouth white. You swallowed every drop looking at him as you licked your lips of any leftover cum.
“You taste so delicious Toya.” You praise him once more which made his cock spring back to life. You only smiled as you crawled on top of him removing your bottoms in the process.
“(Y/n) What are you..wait you don’t need to-AH!” You gave him to chance to talk as you started your pace riding him. You kissed every inch of his neck until it was covered in love marks. Showing how he was the only man for you.
“Toya why don’t you mark me as well? Show them that you are the one with the pretty girl not them.” He wasted no time latching his teeth to your neck. He sucked on any part he could reach, you loved the way your skin felt between his teeth. It caused you to pick up your pace, whispering how great he was in his ears.
His nails dug into your ass as he thrusts up to meet your hips. The sex was amazing, it wasn’t rough or full of lust. It was just you showing your utter dedication to the man next to you.
“I dont know how much longer i can take it...” He panted out to you as his thrusts slowed down letting you take the lead.
“Your so beautiful Toya I love you.” His dull nails digging more into your ass, so much that your going to have bruises tomorrow. The string in your stomach snapped as you moaned out to him, cumming around his cock.
“(Y/N)!” He whined as he shook violently clinging himself to you before he too came. He put his head on your shoulder before crying.
“Theres no need to cry Toya. Im not going anywhere.” You ran your fingers through his hair as you hummed him to sleep.
A/N Before you say anything i know the smut part was trash but i was really tired last night and wanted to get this done so i could work on other things. but i really do hope you enjoyed what ever the hell this was.
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punkscowardschampions · 3 years ago
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Ronnie & Joe
Ronnie: [a phone number]
Ronnie: found you your own special plug
Joe: Can’t wait to get gang-raped by whoever this is
Joe: or maybe it’s a phishing scam, what route have you gone down 🤔
Ronnie: route of she can be your number 8 cos youre such a bike
Joe: it’s that kind of hook-up
Ronnie: pay for the gear if you cant get it up soft lad she looks fuck all like your ma
Ronnie: couldnt track down no more of her bastards for you soz
Joe: taking your role that seriously?
Joe: alright
Ronnie: getting out of it
Ronnie: she can babysit you
Joe: she probably lost custody of her own so
Joe: nice of you on all fronts
Ronnie: yeah
Joe: what, your dealer don’t like me or something
Ronnie: how the fuck would i know like
Ronnie: and how would he you legged it out of there soon as he showed
Joe: no shit I did
Ronnie: ordeals over now baby go cry to your new mammy about it
Joe: unlikely
Joe: but it ain’t my ordeal so
Ronnie: they ll swab & treat him he ll be sound
Joe: give a shit about him
Ronnie: if youve got something to say
Joe: I just said it
Joe: I don’t care about him
Ronnie: you dont care about me fuck off with your heroics
Joe: you didn’t want swooping up and saving, don’t mean I don’t give a fuck
Ronnie: your student loan aint gonna cover both our habits youd have me dopesick cause youre fucking jealous that means you dont
Joe: you’re jealous
Joe: and I said, didn’t stop you, didn’t say you had to
Joe: what’s fun about something oozing and itching in your pants, that’s all
Ronnie: of what
Joe: of every boring ex I have or will ever have
Ronnie: you wish
Ronnie: get em in a room together and they aint even jealous of each other
Joe: I know
Joe: x2
Ronnie: you dont know shit mckenna
Joe: so today I’m green
Joe: not the know-it-all smug college kid
Joe: nice to know how to play it
Ronnie: smug is right whenever i aint gonna suck your dick cause you can read music
Joe: that’s all that’s stopping you?
Ronnie: nah remember its the death wish attention whoring & mommy issues
Ronnie: cant both be functioning junkies youd have fuck all else to get a boner about
Joe: how long have you been doing heroin
Ronnie: youve got loads of catching up to do
Joe: yeah, so I don’t know why you’re acting like I’m being high and mighty
Joe: it’s literally been days
Ronnie: cause you are
Joe: no I’m not, just ‘cos I’d rather not suck dick when I have the funds
Joe: would you do it if you had the cash, that’s just stupid
Ronnie: youve been comparing me to any & every cunt since we met
Joe: like you don’t shit on me any and every chance you get
Joe: you were acting like them, the whole none of my shit is real because yours is SO real, that’s her whole bit
Ronnie: you cant stop fucking doing it even now fucks sake
Ronnie: i shit on you for you its not like i have any cunt to compare you to
Joe: alright, if you’re that sensitive about it
Joe: I’ll really stop
Joe: there 🤐
Ronnie: fuck you
Joe: nah, that was a dick move, alright
Joe: let me make it up to you
Ronnie: youre crying shes a patronising cunt guess what youre right there too
Joe: alright, I deserve that
Ronnie: drop dead
Ronnie: yeah its been days days of me giving you whatever the fuck you ask for
Joe: I know
Joe: so what do you want, seriously
Joe: I’ll do it, make it happen, whatever
Ronnie: like fuck can you make anything happen
Ronnie: youre like every other doss cunt i know theres your comparison
Joe: Probably am
Joe: but you’re the only person I’ve met who feels close to whatever the fuck I am
Joe: there’s the truth
Ronnie: whichever of your exes that worked on is more west than either of us
Joe: Oh I can easily be that dickhead and tell you how crazy they all were
Ronnie: go ed
Joe: the second to last one was the worst
Joe: full-on stalked and harassed the last one like, for no reason
Joe: she also messed with all my shit in a way she thought would send me into an OCD spiral because she didn’t get it
Joe: and when she started hooking up with some other kid she’d send me pics like I’d be 💔
Joe: that’s just after, that was all kind of amusing in a boring way, she was less amusing to be with but more mental
Ronnie: shouldve had some tips off her for the stalking bullshit its probably not too late to send her a dm
Ronnie: ones ive got from this is i dont have to bother learning the alphabet cos id be better off fucking with your record collection by smashing it up & child porn does fuck all for you
Joe: that is my thing, turning up uninvited to fuck everything up
Joe: she might go for it
Joe: exactly, both good to know, yeah 😏
Joe: all pretty basic and vanilla but still, annoying as shit
Ronnie: unless you can get me to do it for you yeah
Ronnie: dinners at what like 7
Joe: you’re gonna ruin my happy uni home?
Joe: oh no
Joe: be there be 7, eating at 8, apparently
Joe: time to ‘mingle’ as she put it which sounds suspicious af
Ronnie: fucking hell
Ronnie: thank christ i already hate you
Joe: saves times, energy less so
Joe: your mate is up for it, unless he’s a convincing liar, which I could see
Ronnie: what energy do you want name it theres gear thatll give us it
Ronnie: he is but i cant see the con shes got fuck all any cunt wants other than pasta shapes & mariahs likely on a diet
Joe: 🤤 and not over her appetizers, like
Joe: there’ll only be the 6 of us so we’ll need entertainment
Ronnie: lad flatmates bringing a bitch
Ronnie: shes gonna need something to get her through it or something she can use to end it
Joe: yeah he has a missus
Joe: even though him and Sophie belong together as the most average whitebread couple ever
Ronnie: make it happen then
Joe: where’s my bow and arrow
Joe: their 💘 ain’t my problem
Ronnie: you said you could do whatever and we needed entertainment
Ronnie: put all that money where your mouth is
Joe: you’re well sweet
Joe: you want her to be living her best life
Joe: dunno if I can hack being his shoulder to cry on in the interim
Ronnie: your teeth wont have time to rot before you choke on em talking to me like that
Joe: go on then
Ronnie: you owe me i dont owe you
Joe: I thought you’d ask for something better
Joe: but your loss
Ronnie: yours youre thinking about it
Joe: I get it, you want it to be hell living here
Ronnie: i dont wanna have to ask
Joe: for what
Ronnie: anything
Joe: why not
Ronnie: you think you can read my mind or some shit
Joe: I’d like to
Joe: and I think you get me, and yeah, I think I get you more than the bullshit mommy issues attention whore comment that was to get a reaction
Joe: I don’t think we’re twin flames just because we share some DNA, I’m not that kind of delusional, believe it or not
Ronnie: cause weve shared a needle though yeah
Joe: I get it, another kid with a habit, you’ve met hundreds
Joe: it is different though
Joe: tell me it isn’t
Ronnie: different cos its a habit you didnt have days ago
Joe: it’s not your fault
Joe: for good or bad
Joe: you didn’t spike me without asking
Ronnie: i didnt say that
Ronnie: i said thats why its different
Joe: yeah
Ronnie: nobody did any of this shit for me i dont know why im doing it for you
Joe: do you want to, or do you think you need to
Ronnie: what the fuck does it matter
Joe: you either fuck with me, you like fucking with me or you think you’ve got to protect me or some bollocks
Ronnie: protect you from the needle i stuck in your arm yeah that makes loads of sense
Joe: from getting a bad dose, being beat up by one of your dealers
Ronnie: i just wanted a front row seat
Ronnie: im not gonna get one when your family finds out
Joe: that’s fine by me
Joe: you reckon they’ll fly me home for an intervention then?
Joe: shouldn’t be surprising how oblivious they are
Ronnie: i dont care what they do to try & fix it youll be at rock bottom by then
Joe: they won’t try, they don’t
Joe: just because I weren’t shooting up doesn’t mean I haven’t been doing plenty other fucked shit for ages without it ever being a conversation
Joe: one of the kids that they took in, is a walking skeleton
Joe: can’t get her to eat, some reason don’t do anything but try to reason with her like she’s reasonable, never mind the rest
Ronnie: no shit they dont i was proof of it before you or her
Ronnie: in the same town with the same name she fucking gave me and still out of sight out of mind
Joe: precisely
Joe: so if you’re hoping fucking me up will get her to come about then you shouldn’t bother, honestly
Joe: save yourself that disappointment
Ronnie: it aint about her paying attention
Joe: good
Ronnie: you wanna know me i only want you to know what it feels like
Joe: then let’s do it
Ronnie: nah i was rem to reckon it was worth shit
Ronnie: it aint
Ronnie: you aint
Ronnie: youre never gonna have your head wrecked how mine is and i cant be arsed to put the time in fucking you up in the selfish special way i need when you keep pure loving it like
Joe: is that not indicative of how I’m already quite fucked enough
Joe: just because it’s not abandonment based
Joe: what normal cunt would love any of this, even contact you again after the first
Ronnie: fuck no
Ronnie: youre living your best life and it makes me wanna hang myself
Joe: Christ, you’re up yourself, aren’t you
Ronnie: &
Joe: you want me to roll my sleeves up again and show you the recent damage?
Ronnie: yeah
Joe: [pics]
Ronnie: [obvs gotta send him some back]
Joe: [a straight up new one like just did it]
Ronnie: [ofc she has to also like this is a competition]
Joe: [hope you started small so you have somewhere to go ‘cos the vibe]
Ronnie: [knowing y’all you didn’t but it won’t stop you and I will be forever on edge]
Joe: [so grim, don’t pass out]
Ronnie: [or end up needing stitches]
Joe: [probably do them yourselves, ick]
Joe: do you fucking get it yet
Ronnie: why do you care
Joe: why do you think
Ronnie: i keep telling you i dont
Joe: braindead sounds ideal
Ronnie: horse girl not about to suffocate you
Joe: she would if I let her, like
Joe: 🍈🍈
Ronnie: wait til theres a chance ill choke on my vomit next time christ
Joe: so lay back and I’ll tell you some more
Ronnie: ok go
Joe: [go on about Sophie in a way I shall not even bother but let us assume it is crude and rude af]
Ronnie: [we’re not into poor Soph but they clearly are]
Joe: [just fuck and get it out the way lads, so rude to everyone else rn]
Ronnie: [honestly, but hopefully at this dinner party because Jamie jealousy will be off the charts]
Joe: [Charlie gon have to keep quiet ‘til you home lmao]
Joe: Any luck?
Ronnie: got no pasta shapes in my system have i
Ronnie: but why the fuck are you not lurking to save me
Joe: you want me to swallow the bile for you then, okay
Joe: the last one looked deep
Ronnie: deep enough if you wanna pussy out and spit instead
Joe: I don’t
Joe: where are you
Ronnie: dorothys
Joe: he in?
Joe: if I have to show him it’s brotherly concern you’ll only die quicker
Ronnie: nosey cunt wouldve stopped me
Joe: Yeah
Joe: I can say sorry if you want or I can just come patch you up and not lie first
Ronnie: i dont need your help
Joe: I know
Joe: purely wanna save you for my own complex and to be loving life even harder
Ronnie: wank off about the sos from the other day thats it i cant top you carrying me out til the bleeding stops
Joe: I’m coming over
Joe: you’ve got time to lock the door if you really don’t want me to come in
Joe: can get my own shattered glass without breaking his windows
Ronnie: he must like you to have given you his address
Ronnie: but not enough to overshare the door dont lock cos i broke it 💔
Joe: or am I better stalker than you give credit
Joe: thanks for the tip, baby
Ronnie: youd have been waiting for me to get here not the other way round
Joe: You do want me to read your mind
Joe: maybe a lobotomy will help
Ronnie: hot
Ronnie: reading your mind you want me to pass out before you fuck me but its not that deep
Joe: the wound or the vIbEzzZ
Ronnie: this your coming out cos you sound like charlie
Joe: just trying to turn you off, don’t want blood to gush out
Ronnie: liar youd be made up to see that
Joe: not hiding in the bushes yet
Joe: slow down
Ronnie: youre used to being the big brother i get it
Joe: Something like that
Ronnie: i know how to ride a bike without stabilisers or whatever the fuck
Joe: and tie your shoes
Joe: it’s alright, we’ve established I’m not a paedo
Joe: what can’t you do then
Ronnie: err what a nonce would say
Ronnie: read music we also fucking established
Joe: you teach me how to shoot myself up, I’ll teach you how to
Ronnie: not a fair swap i dont need to learn how
Joe: You don’t wanna be a babysitter either, so you’ve said
Ronnie: you dont like me any more or what
Joe: Of course I do
Joe: You got me my own dealer first
Ronnie: you asked me to 1st
Joe: How did I?
Ronnie: what else is ? for a plug without giving a fuck if ive rattled myself into a ditch
Joe: If I talked to you as much as I felt like
Joe: You’d tell me to fuck off more than you already do
Joe: I’ve got no clue where the line is, how much you want me to care
Ronnie: what line
Ronnie: i dont want you to care
Joe: Tough shit
Joe: I didn’t ask you to get me a dealer
Ronnie: you fucking did
Joe: I just didn’t wanna see you suck dick on my behalf, alright, that’s all
Joe: what you do for yourself is your business
Ronnie: calm down nothing i do is for you
Joe: 👌
Ronnie: dont call her then
Joe: you on commission?
Ronnie: 🖕
Joe: If I do, you’ll still have to see me
Ronnie: youll see me bleed out on the kitchen floor 1st
Joe: You’re a pro, I know you’re being overly-dramatic
Ronnie: at opening as many veins as itll take to not have to see you again yeah
Joe: to make me hurry*
Joe: I’m on the tube
Joe: you have to live in the middle of nowhere
Ronnie: no fixed address i told you
Joe: ❗️
Joe: if there’s a break-up or a thruple, you can have the extra room
Joe: makes sense now
Ronnie: it dont make sense you reckon we can afford any extras however far out
Joe: like you said, she’ll get homesick and chuck it in even if Marc won’t dump his girlfriend
Ronnie: if she does youll be homeless too like unless his missus is gonna cover the costs of the en suite for you
Joe: you can have my room, it’s the smallest
Joe: they can have the en-suite palace and I’ll take theirs, which is not next to the others 👌
Ronnie: not that youve thought loads about it
Joe: if you heard her disney playlist everyday, you’d think about it as well
Ronnie: id think about killing her or myself not a cosy little bed swap
Ronnie: shed never hack living with me nor would you
Joe: well that thought is never far from the front of my mind
Joe: if you need the bed, you know it’s yours
Ronnie: get it through your head i need fuck all from you
Joe: yeah, yeah
Ronnie: theres this way of living when youre not inside your ma in every possible sense course you aint heard about it
Joe: you need to prove you’re self-sufficient ‘cos no one’s ever given a shit about you but Charlie and the other one
Joe: I’m aware you’ve made it to your old age without me, you’re alright
Ronnie: i need to be it the only proofs im not dead yet baby
Ronnie: you need me to be old cos im not in a fucking coma & you cant get it up else
Joe: I’d rather be in the coma myself but you can be too
Joe: not calling dibs
Ronnie: oldest gets 1st dibs
Joe: *until the youngest cries about it so much you get told to give in to shut ‘em up
Ronnie: try me
Joe: you know you can’t hack my crying
Joe: does your head in SO much
Ronnie: save it for when you need lube or horse girl is gonna be coming after you with the leftover glue so you can never fucking leave her
Joe: come at you with the needle and sew us together, babe
Joe: unlucky
Ronnie: more than unlucky if i cant bust a stitch open to be the dead girl you want
Joe: you’re the dead girl I want already come on
Ronnie: til i teach you how to 💉 yourself
Joe: nah
Ronnie: 💘
Joe: looking well deformed these days, my one
Ronnie: could cut it out know youd be made up for the matching needlework
Joe: you play mad professor I’ll play corpse
Ronnie: long as i dont have to play nice
Joe: know what you take me for, actually, but no
Joe: obviously not
Ronnie: cant take you anywhere even if i did wanna
Joe: god imagine the dent in your street cred, sis
Ronnie: if i could cry i obviously would
Joe: repression or fucked tear ducts from all the 😭 you been doing
Ronnie: what im that baby faced youre taking me for a newborn now
Joe: nah, mr i don’t fuck kids here, remember
Joe: plus kids are always calling 999 by mistake and they’d get there before me
Joe: maybe, depends how many people have stabbed other people today
Ronnie: id have got the numbers up but ive been busy like
Joe: gotta make time for you, babes
Joe: it’s called self-care
Ronnie: ask me what with
Ronnie: shittest stalker ever you are
Joe: go on
Joe: school us
Ronnie: cant cry cos when i was linking you with a plug you dont want i was getting myself linked with your meds
Ronnie: best guess as a better stalker than you & less basic white girl than your crazy ex
Joe: 💡 fairplay
Joe: won’t tell you any other side-affects, see if you can guess ‘em right
Ronnie: i wasnt gonna take em but you want me to get you so bad
Joe: yeah misunderstood white boy is selling less these days
Joe: help a brother out
Ronnie: fuck all has happened so i probably cant
Joe: 💔 oh well
Joe: they’re nothing exciting, even though I managed to get the highest dosage they’ll do
Ronnie: maybe mines off for not giving you the benefit of the doubt when i could continue reckoning youre such a pussy
Joe: you’ll forget by tomorrow, no problem
Ronnie: neither brother is gonna let me if they walk in on me microdosing theyll reckon its a getting well party and get the deccies out
Joe: only so many times you can just kidding that ‘fore it gets old
Joe: we’ll go out, when I get there
Ronnie: where you kidnapping me to baby
Joe: I know enough to know it’s all wrong turns and blindfolds, not giving you a map
Ronnie: if its a&e no cunts finding your body even with a map
Joe: piss off
Ronnie: give us a clue
Joe: I’ll mark it with an X if you do me
Ronnie: if you ever fucking get here
Joe: if we were sewn together this wouldn’t be a problem
Ronnie: wanting to look like twins so nobodyll give a shit that you wanna fuck me would be something youd think about on the tube mckenna
Joe: they run in my old man’s DNA so have to look for those bastards instead
Joe: all I know about hers is addiction
Ronnie: course he does fuck alls your own idea
Ronnie: if hes got a sister even a meff nancy drew like youll be able to find bastards they had together
Joe: loads, Catholic, remember
Joe: twins kid is black though so process of elimination
Ronnie: cute how that runs in your family too like
Joe: guess so
Joe: not like it’s that crazy a concept
Ronnie: not like youve ever met an irish catholic who werent a saint yeah
Joe: it’s a fucked place to live
Joe: really third world in that respect
Ronnie: your real da is who you wanna look for if hes got no bastards going about its cos he cant knock anyone up
Joe: that your all men are pigs stance
Joe: alright courtney calm down
Joe: I’m out now anyway, don’t need a real mum or dad to come rescue us from the priests and that
Ronnie: nah its a fact unless his twin kept going up the backstreet or he was only sticking it in her other 2 holes
Joe: they didn’t really grow up together
Joe: he left when he was 15
Joe: maybe she was a late bloomer, happy days
Ronnie: 💔 your ma wasn’t then i wouldnt be here
Joe: no dig about how you’re dying now anyway ‘cos I’m taking so long?
Joe: you must be fading fast and not just being a dramatic bitch
Joe: good thing I’m in [wherever we ended up locating y’all] now
Ronnie: shut up i said its not that deep
Ronnie: youre the dramatic bitch legging it here for a fucking scratch
Joe: you wanted me to
Ronnie: you want to i dont give a shit
Joe: right, that’s what I meant
Ronnie: you can stop with the gay shit i told you hes not here
Joe: gays don’t own sarcasm
Ronnie: they own getting attached to cunts fast who dont care
Joe: awh, you being replaced rn?
Ronnie: horse girl wishes
Joe: Can’t catch a break or a man that one
Ronnie: after a pity fuck with you who knows what shed catch
Joe: you wanna infect her by-proxy, you’re so blatant
Ronnie: i shouldve got you to bring her my bloods everywhere
Joe: adding her puke to the mix would make it interesting, sure
Joe: bet she knows first aid
Ronnie: if youre too pussy to break my ribs yourself get back on the tube
Joe: threaten me with a good time
Ronnie: i just did
Joe: without meaning it, yeah
Ronnie: try and hurt me i mean it
Joe: [why do y’all always set the tension so high lads lmao, we know but]
Ronnie: [me and my boo here like calm down you can’t hook up yet but they are both like !!!!]
Joe: [shouldn’t have let you get on that train sir but you would so]
Ronnie: [I shouldn’t let her open her mouth ever but here we are]
Joe: [forreal lmao]
Ronnie: [gotta draw an x on him in her blood when he shows up before we can do a more permanent one however we are either as a scar or tattoo so soz for increasing the tension even more lol]
Joe: [just got to stare at her for ages and then shove her away very dramatically ‘cos you can’t, head through to whichever room she was bleeding in to assess/gawp at]
Ronnie: [she’s gotta lol like well if that’s the best you can do at trying to hurt me I’m not worried]
Joe: [‘whaddya use?’ and just going through this flat as if you’ve been here before/were invited by anyone but Ronnie vaguely because manners can’t matter when we’ve gone this far already]
Ronnie: ['what, you didn't
touch yourself enough on the tube?' but we are obvs showing him whatever we did use because it's just another way to flirt and we can use it to make that x happen so]
Joe: [shakes head ‘spill too much and they emergency stop’ and a look like do I look like I wanna be on a psychward but in a 😏 don’t answer that way, doing our own tallies with it, of course]
Ronnie: ['we're walking then' like where are you taking me don't get comfy bitch]
Joe: [little disbelieving lol like excuse me princess ‘your carriage was unavailable’
Ronnie: ['no shit the horse is dead busy']
Joe: [‘I ain’t taking you to a stable’]
Ronnie: ['that's where we ain't going, now tell me where the fuck we are' because we're like an excited kid about this]
Joe: [it’s cute and we clearly think so even if we’re distracting ourselves with this self-harm so we don’t go too far, unrelated but I haven’t thought where yous are going lmao but I’m vibing something London but something she wouldn’t have done, something music related, also if it has like, kid vibes, bonus, I’ll have to look so just keeping tight-lipped to be annoying and surveying the bloody carnage he’s now added to ‘you want to clean up?’]
Ronnie: [it'd be cute if there was something like thinktank but for music instead of science but idk if that exists anyways in answer to that question she's just gonna remove her top or whatever like yeah it do have blood on even though we know that's not what he means because we're still in a flirty mood despite how annoying his non reply is]
Joe: [that’s what I’m vibing but likewise have no idea, I’m sure there is shit though and you could find it Joseph, anyway, truly the this is fine meme about that ‘cos you can’t turn away 😳 but also boy don’t, moving like you’re gonna come close to her though]
Ronnie: [soz Charlie cos she shamelessly threw her top on the floor and isn't gonna clean up any of this blood even on herself like I literally should say she goes to the sink and then to get clean clothes but instead we all know she's just gonna take Joe's jacket or whatever and put that on, thank god he's all about the layers]
Joe: [god bless the grunge
aesthetic, ‘do you do it in front of him?’ and touching the cuts that are still showing ‘cos you know there’s some still, and it is like when and where do you do this when you do not have a room lmao]
Ronnie: ['yeah' leaving it up to him whether he wants to think it's in an attention whore way cos we're still annoyed at that call out lol but realistically it's just because of how long they've known each other and how they be living, she's not actively trying to upset Charlie that much most of the time]
Joe: [‘does he do it?’ ‘cos we can’t imagine it from the little we know but also can’t imagine him just chilling if he isn’t as fucked as them]
Ronnie: [the facial expression equivalent of his amused lol earlier because no]
Joe: [dropping it even though you find this odd like don’t worry boy, the tea is he is getting over it and wanting her to stop, pulling the jacket sleeve to take her out the door like come on]
Ronnie: ['he knows what'll happen if he tries to stop me' cos you can't tell me that when they were younger he didn't do exactly that and she went ballistic but more importantly HOW DARE YOU BOO because that is 1000% a Fraze move and I'm dead]
Joe: [yes I thought it was legit for a parallel, enjoy the long trip back to central guys]
Ronnie: [idk how we are gonna stop you hooking up to fill the time other than the other people in close proximity lol]
Joe: [maybe a uni/work obligation can come in and he has to go like legit ‘cos that’d kill this off]
Ronnie: [personally devastated that means an iou for this cute date but I love how fuming she would be at never finding out where they were going]
Ronnie: [not to mention the not at all casual and public domestic they’d have would be such a fat mood and show she cares when she’s literally like umm what the fuck do you mean you’re leaving]
Joe: [love how blatant we both are individually]
Ronnie: [hard same]
Joe: They sprung that rehearsal on us last minute
Joe: I already said, I’d give you the funds and you could go do whatever
Ronnie: and i told you to go fuck yourself
Ronnie: or your cello
Joe: I wouldn’t have wasted my time let alone yours if I knew that was gonna happen
Joe: how would you go about fucking a cello, exactly
Ronnie: waste more of your own time figuring it out its your raging hard on for it
Joe: I can’t not go
Joe: they make you sign a bloodoath when you get in basically
Joe: no excuses
Ronnie: youd have found an excuse fast enough if id stuck a needle in your arm
Joe: no, I wouldn’t, ‘cos it wasn’t an option
Joe: there was already enough damage to hide
Ronnie: i dont give a shit what options youve got
Joe: right, tell it to the crowd that amassed, they might believe you a tiny bit more than I do
Joe: I’ll make it up to you, okay
Ronnie: thats what soft cunts wanna hear when you cant hide no more & since you reckon you wont be getting forced into treatment you get to keep your gob shut for all that being sorry bullshit
Joe: make it into something it ain’t ‘cos you can’t hack hearing it
Ronnie: i dont wanna hear from you end of
Joe: alright
Joe: see you around then
Ronnie: 🖕
1 note · View note
nightmaretyrantvantas · 5 years ago
Text
Time was running out....
 ( I finally got this to sound the way I wanted so its being posted...hopefully theres a happy conclusion soon... : ) hope this was worth the wait of the update time)
Time was running out. 
That was all Deceit could think, his mind whirling as he sat in the light sides’ hallway of the mindscape with his head in his hands. He felt like he was trapped falling down a suffocating pit, or helplessly watching a horrible car accident happen over and over, or help maybe both at once. 
He didnt have much time left before Patton and Logan collided again under Virgil’s influence and something went horribly and irreversibly wrong.
Deceit had been trying to stop him before it escalated too much. Dammit he had been trying so hard to stop one of Virgil’s plans early, and maybe make him bored enough that he’d forget about it and move on for awhile. But no, Deceit knew who he was dealing with and the anger he was pushing into this particular scheme..the anger he was redirecting at himself now. 
The single string was his only warning to stop trying to interfere, to back down before he got himself into real trouble. 
But he couldnt, he couldnt just sit back and watch him go unchecked this time. 
“ But what can I even do....” came his own hoarse voice. 
Patton was too far under his control to even listen to him or give him a chance. He couldnt break that control alone.
Logan had dismissed him, brushed aside his help and didnt listen to him either. He was falling into the web as well. He couldnt ask the other dark sides for help, they were fully loyal to the side that protected and sheltered them, who helped give them seats at the table whether Thomas and the others liked it or not. They weren’t going to cross him for nothing....
He wasnt sure what else to do...and he was running out of time to think...Deceit squeezed his eyes shut with a angry hiss and banged the wall with his fist. 
He couldnt do this alone.....
“....alone huh?”
His eyes snapped open in a heartbeat at the new voice, and his eyes met shiny, fancy black boots that tapped in a twitchy, antsy motion. He took a deep breath and slowly raised his gaze up from those boots to the black and bright green outfit before finally meeting Remus’s bright green, wild eyes. The unflitered side gave the other a wide snidely cheerful smile and put his hands on his hips, leaning down.
“ Dece! I’ve been lookin just about everywhere for you! Im hurt you didnt even stick around to see the results of the idea you gave me!! maaaaaaaaan you should’ve seen the look on Virgy’s and Des’s faces! HA! ” The green side giggled wildly at the memory, and Deceit felt his shoulders slump a little. But his guard stayed raised more than it usual would.
As much as Remus claimed to “favor” him, he knew damn well that if Deceit slipped off on his own he didnt exactly want to be found and for all his impulsiveness the taller side usually could respect that. For him to seek him out now of all times.....
“ Remus....what are you doing here? And...dont bother lying to me of all people...” The laughter faded, replaced with a small sigh.
“ Dee....I think we both know why im here...” Deceit shut his eyes again to try to compose himself but quickly opened them again at the sound of rustling fabric, seeing Remus crouched in front of him now with his head tilted and his mouth pulled into a displeased frown. They stared at each other in a tense silence and the snake side felt his himself tense more from stress. When he opened his mouth and stopped whatever Remus was about to say, his voice was hostile and scared accusing.
“ Did He send you to come get me so I dont meddle?” The other side snorted and sneered at him, baring his teeth a little like a feral animal in offense.
“ oh BITCH pleeeease! Even if he DID, do you really think I would do it just because he ordered me to?! The hell do you think I am? Prince Pansy?” He flinched back a little, slumping. Remus’s look softened and the sneer melted into a pained frown. They didnt like fighting with each other, and a bare hand touched his gloved one.
“ Whatever you plan to do....dont let anxie find you in the immediate aftermath ok? Only I get to mess up that pretty face after all~” He cooed with a suggestive wink, making the human half of his face flush with heat. But before he could say anything Remus was gone without a trace, leaving him alone in the hallway once more. Alone and no closer to figuring out how to do this on his own. There was no way he could save them on his own....save...
He was on his feet and running down the hall before his thoughts full finished forming. 
There was one last person he could try...one last shot.
He only prayed he wasnt too late...
Before he knew it he was at the gold trimmed door and banging on it desperately, out of breath from sprinting across the mindscape. He didnt stop until it clicked and swung open, and he had to grab the doorframe a little to keep steady as he caught his breath.
“ D-deceit? What in the world are you banging on my door this late for....are you alright?” Roman reached his hand out  and put in on his shoulder, startled to see tears in the other’s eyes when he looked up at him.
“ R-roman...I...i...” He faltered briefly as he remembered his single warning. He wouldnt get another one...but as he looked into Roman’s worried and confused eyes, and saw the starts of sleepless bags forming under the prince’s eyes from stress he steeled his resolve. This had gone on long enough.
He needed help.
“ Please...you’re the only one I can trust right now...Roman I need your help.” A gloved hand reached up and grabbed the one on his shoulder, gripping it shakily as gold and brown met red.
“ Patton and Logan are in danger and you’re my last hope at saving them...I know it doesnt make sense but please...please believe me...and help me.” There was a moment of silence and Deceit shut his eyes, afraid for a moment to see more glowing strings. Then he felt it.
The hand in his squeezed his in return, and his eyes opened to see a grim and determined look.
“ What do we do?”
tada! I hope you guys like this update! Im going to try to write more soon but I finally got this one finished! Enjoy~
taglist
@phantommoonpeople @sweetsweetemo @amazable01 @leesacrakon
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pineapple----princess · 5 years ago
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Danger Days Secret Santa
@ruination-formation, I was your secret santa! Sorry it's up late, but I hope you like it.
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Prompt:
The Witch has a habit of pulling the truth out of killjoys. It doesn't matter if they accept that truth or not.
Ship:
Fun Ghoul/ Kobra Kid
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"Look, all I'm sayin is that maybe pulling out a grenade during a supply run isnt the best idea..."
I glanced over at Fun Ghoul. We had gone on a supply run into Battery City. Ghoul had at one point (and by at one point, I mean weeks) said that if he had to eat one more can of expired dog food, he was gonna give himself up to Korse just because dracs get better food than they do. Party Poison had told him to either go get some real food, or for Destroya's sake, shut his goddamn mouth.
Jet and I agreed whole heartedly. I mean, who wants to listen to Ghoul complain about kibble all day? Sure, I enjoy hearing his voice. It's one if the few things that keeps me sane, or maybe it's the think that's driving me to the brink of insanity. Either way, I love his voice. It's always filled with passion for whatever hes planning. He always is so filled with energy. But, the few times he is relaxed, he has this low grumble that makes me want to sit and listen to him till I fall asleep. Hell, I have fallen asleep to his voice.
But that's besides the point he was driving us crazy with his complaining. I have a hunch that it's not just the Power Pup. Theres been nothin to do for the past few weeks. We've all been getting restless. It's a rare occasion that theres nothin to do. But here we are.
I was ripped from my thoughts when I heard a loud slam of the door. Ghoul had left. Then I heard the Trans Am start up. I jumped out of my seat. Right as I am about to leave, I looked back at the other two members of the gang.
"I'm goin with him" I say.
None of us would have any clue what was going to happen in Battery City the next day.
•~•
"Look, all I'm sayin is that maybe pulling out a grenade during a supply run isnt the best idea..."
"Who are you to talk? You do this kinda bullshit all the time!"
"Ghoul please. There are swarms of dracs everywhere. It isnt funny. I'm all for playing pranks on Better Living, but right now we are in one of their most highly guarded food containment facilities. We dont have room for error!"
Ghoul turns and looks at me. The look in his eyes are different. Instead if the mistevious smile that usually rests on his face, theres a fire. Not the good kind either. Theres so much anger and hatred. It shocks me. Then I realize. It's the anniversary of him leaving the city for the zones. BL/ind had hurt him so much. Likely more than anyone else in the gang. He always powers through, hides the pain that he is so clearly feeling.
But now he has been enabled. A grenade in hand standing in one of the most important buildings Better Living has. Setting off that grenade, however would indefinitely ghost both of us, as well. But he dosnt seem to know, or care.
"Why do you care so much? No food means no production, this could set back BL/ind far enough that we could have a chance!"
I can see the hysteria building in his eyes.
"I care because this would kill both of us. If it only dust me, I would be fine with it, but you would be dusted too!"
I was yelling by the end of my sentence. I wasn't thinking. The yelling had attracted the attention of several dozen drac units. I wasn't joking when I said this place was heavily guarded.
Ghoul and I whipped out our blasters. My gaze darted to him. He looked nervous, not that anyone else could tell. To any of our opponents, he would look calm. Cocky, even. But I knew him better than that. Sure, the gang had taken on more than this, but that was when there was four of us. Now there was only two.
We started shooting. So did the dracs. It was complete chaos. I somehow ended up with the grenade. I knew that if only one well placed shot hit it, everyone and everything in this building would be gone. I know this because I helped build the grenade. I was bored, and so was Ghoul. We had explosives. Thus it was born.
But I couldnt think about that, or anything really. Only shooting. We were in a small room that was once white. The scorches of blasters painted the walls black. It was beutiful, in an odd way. But small rooms mean nowhere to hide.
There were dracs strewn all over the floor. The first group that we were confronted with almost definitely gone. But more kept coming. I looked at Ghoul. His jaw was set, eyes were narrowed. He was completely focused. A rare sight, but a good one.
Suddenly my abdomen started burning. An invisible fire scorched my entire body. I dropped to the floor. I could hear Ghoul scream. I looked down. Sure enough, there was a small, black hole in my stomach.
Then everything froze.
Not in a metaphorical way, either. Everything just stopped. The firefight completely paused around me. Then I saw her. Maybe she was a her. It was hard to tell, considering her body was shrouded in a feathery cloak sort of thing, and her face was concealed by a mask.
As she came towards me, I realized she was floating maybe two inches off the ground. She stopped. I looked at her. This must be The Witch Jet Star kept on talking about. I just thought that she was some sort of zone myth. But here she was. Floating right infront of me.
"It's not your time yet..." Her voice calm, yet daunting "How did you manage to die, without it being your time to go?"
She looked down on me. I could feel the confusion radiating off of her.
"I dont know" I said. It was all I could say. I looked back over at the frozen Ghoul, a lazer beam headed straight towards his forehead.
"Is this still happening? Or did you really freeze time?"
"That all depends on how you perceive it, Kobra Kid", she looked down at me,"You care about that boy more than you know."
"What do you mean?"
"What I mean is that you care more about him than most everything else in this world"
"You make it sound like I have some undying attachment to him"
"You do", she ponders for a second,"You're dead. Theres no denying that. However, you're not supposed to be dead."
"Okay... so what's going to happen?"
"Well, how do feel about where time has stopped? Do you think you could leave now, and be content with your contributions in this life?"
I look back at Fun Ghoul, who's imminent demise was obvious.
"No. I want to save Ghoul. He has so much more to do"
The Witch turns toward me.
"That is not at all how you feel about Fun Ghoul."
"What do you mean?" I was starting to get frustrated.
"You feel more for him. Different than how you feel for the other KillJoys. Now, I ask again, how do you feel about him?"
My face was completely flushed with anger and embarrassment by this point.
"Okay so I love him. Big deal. You offered me another chance, now can I have it?"
"...yes, you may."
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somnilogical · 5 years ago
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<<Over the past year, however, Google has appeared to clamp down. It has gradually scaled back opportunities for employees to grill their bosses and imposed a set of workplace guidelines that forbid “a raging debate over politics or the latest news story.” It has tried to prevent workers from discussing their labor rights with outsiders at a Google facility and even hired a consulting firm that specializes in blocking unions. Then, in November, came the firing of the four activists. The escalation sent tremors through the Google campus in Mountain View, Calif., and its offices in cities like New York and Seattle, prompting many employees — whether or not they had openly supported the activists — to wonder if the company’s culture of friendly debate was now gone for good.
(A Google spokeswoman would not confirm the names of the people fired on Nov. 25. “We dismissed four individuals who were engaged in intentional and often repeated violations of our longstanding data-security policies,” the spokeswoman said. “No one has been dismissed for raising concerns or debating the company’s activities.” Without naming Berland, Google disputed that investigators pressured him.)>>
https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2020/02/18/magazine/google-revolt.html
<<“Of the five people that were fired, three of us are trans women,” Spiers said. “That is either an unbelievable coincidence or Google is targeting the most vulnerable.”
“Trans Googlers make up a very small percentage of Googlers,” she added. “They make up a slightly larger percentage of organizers, but not 60%.”>>
https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2019/dec/17/fifth-google-worker-activist-fired-in-a-month-says-company-is-targeting-the-vulnerable
i too am transfem and would "violate longstanding data-security policies" if my organization were being unjust. i wouldnt say that unless it were already obvious by what bits ive leaked to people about my life, because otherwise i could suppress this information and whistleblow more.
if you were an evil corp at this point youd probably try to avoid hiring any trans women in the first place because given this happens to you, its likely done by a transfem. not that this saved CFAR, who never hired a trans woman, from having a bunch of transfems whistleblow on them despite not being employees.
from what ive read from transfem google employees who are or were involved in activism, the degredation of google's culture. their complicity with ICE and weapons manufacturing mirrors CFAR's with OpenAI and DeepMind; authoritarianism and expulsion of transfems who object to this among a myriad of wrongs. to protect the territory of injustice and complicity with organizations like ICE, google needs to import "a consulting firm that specializes in blocking unions", CFAR needs to violate their whistleblower policy. if you once protect injustice, justice is ever after your enemy. morality isnt some modular thing such that you can be comitted to protecting injustice and not have this choice spiral into also invoking and protecting systems that protect injustice and invoking further things to protect those, recursively. all the way down to doing really dumb and obvious unjust things like transmisogyny (lots of future posts), changing your fundraiser after its clear its losing money, announcing that this year you got way below your donation target and claim to have no idea why.
well *i* know the compact generator for all of these things, and that makes me strong. unlike MIRI/CFAR who like the CDC rely on gaslighting the populace for myopic gains. i also wore a particle mask during the time that the CDC claimed that they were useless to preventing spread of disease, so it was really important to give them to doctors and nurses.
after so much gaslighting, *i* have built up general capabilities at arbitraging the difference between what agents claim and the truth. people who say:
<<Edit: This is a type of post that should have been vetted with someone for infohazards and harms before being posted, and (Further edit) I think it should have been removed by the authors., though censorship is obviously counterproductive at this point.
Infohazards are a real thing, as is the Unilateralists’s curse. (Edit to add: No, infohazards and unilateralist’s curse are not about existential or global catastrophic risk. Read the papers.) And right now, overall, reduced trust in CDC will almost certainly kill people. Yes, their currently political leadership is crappy, and blameworthy for a number of bad decisions—but it doesn’t change the fact that undermining them now is a very bad idea.
Yes, the CDC has screwed up many times, but publicly blaming them for things that were non-obvious (like failing to delay sending out lab kits for further testing,) or that they screwed up, and everyone paying attention including them now realizes they got wrong (like being slow to allow outside testing,) in the middle of a pandemic seems like exactly the kind of consequence-blind action that lesswrongers should know better than to engage in.
Disclaimer: I know lots of people at CDC, including some in infectious diseases, and have friends there. They are human, and get things wrong under pressure—and perhaps there are people who would do better, but that’s not the question at hand.>>
https://www.greaterwrong.com/posts/h4vWsBBjASgiQ2pn6/credibility-of-the-cdc-on-sars-cov-2/comment/uDYbgf3QtEQirbsJk
havent. its easy to see how peoples minds are warped when its someone elses glowy thing, when its someone elses friends working for an institution that that someone else routed their hopes through.
its easier to recognize betrayal and see knowledge beyond the veil when its happening to someone else, instead of you.
until you build up general skills for recognizing it, this sort of betrayal isnt infinitely powerful. and like how you might expect that smart people who live for predation would do anti-inductive smart predatory things, but they end up converging on child sex rings; institutions that betray you, because justice is their enemy will start doing dumb unjust things like banning two people from speaking about their irl experiences with anna salamon, saying their first-hand accounts werent evidence and then citing anna salamon's first-hand account of the meeting as evidence. when i objected that this was a fucked up self-serving ontology of "evidence" they acted like i was objecting to "beliefs flow from evidence" and they acted as if what i was saying was obscure and beyond their ability to comprehend. their "incomprehension" was fake, downstream of a fear to dynamically compute things in front of other people that might end up outside the orthodoxy. the result of which is they display a blue screen of death and say “i just dont understand and aaa dont explain this to me!!!”. and then people agree that it "seems like it could be an infohazard" because when your goal is the preservation of the matrix, everything that tears it down looks like hazardous information.
or a cfar employee, in response to claims that anna's transmisogyny influences CFAR's hiring choices, claiming that anna salamon, head of CFAR, is not involved in CFAR's hiring. until i post proof from another CFAR employee pursuing personal vengeance against the org for hiring their rapist where its tangentially mentioned and they suddenly "realize" that anna salamon, head of CFAR, is involved in CFAR's hiring process.
or a thousand other injustices that have burned themselves into my brain during my months of talking with people under the assumption that they were simply mistaken in their path to saving the world. when they were actually un-mistaken in their path to having babies and a low chance of personal death. hoping and expecting someone else will take heroic responsibility for the planet.
like when you drill down to the base of injustice, it bottoms out in dumb and petty injustice. like the structure doesnt go infinitely high and complex, if you go down to the base level, you just need a bit of courage to not flinch away from what you see even if it seems that it means the ruin of something you ran your hopes and dreams through.
--
"isnt this a little... extreme?" i hear some people ask. ""dont protect regions of injustice?" that sounds like the end product of obsessive compulsive fixation on virtue at the expense of practicality."
well, assuming the algorithm seeding this response is a systemic reasoning tool, it should forkbomb when you consider if youd output ""dont protect regions of untruth?" that sounds like the end product of obsessive compulsive fixation on virtue at the expense of practicality." in response to eliezers essay. the principle behind both is the same such that if you hold by one you should hold by the other.
all of these things have parallels. if you want to see what is happening with MIRI/CFAR, theres a lot of mutual information with whats happening with Google.
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minecraftoworymode · 5 years ago
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picked a whole bouquet of whoopsie-daisies the other day reading some Very badfeel content so to cheer myself up here’s some super self-indulgent ramblings about romeo recovery post-s2
“YOU CAN DANCE IF YOU WANT TO YOU CAN LEAVE YOUR INTERNALIZED MISOGYNY BEHIND” or how romeo learned to stop worrying and indulge in the ““feminine”“ shit in life
when romeo transitioned he scrubbed everything that could be potentially viewed as feminine from his appearance and behaviour. while he did everything he could about the former (hairstyle, clothing, body language, voice), it didn’t feel like enough bc he couldn’t change some things that ppl used to be jerks- his frame (short and lithe), his family, his being trans- so he made up for it by trying to “act” like a “real man”. this unfortunately meant he was super vulnerable to manipulative alt-right indoctrination tactics (”we will validate you as a man as long as you endorse our assholery and share our shitty beliefs about what it means to be a man”) and he was on the verge of getting sucked into gamergate ideology when [THIS LORE IS ANOTHER POST] and hey, now the world is minecraft. u dont gotta perform gender roles for villagers they dont care. xara will not only actually eat ur liver for pulling The Bullshit but when you are kind she smiles, so bright and warm, and it is very very nice so maybe you should keep on doing that. n fred? fred is chill with their Everything in a way uve only ever Dreamed of. romeo marinates in this sauce for a couple centuries and comes the closest to being comfortable in his own skin he’s ever been.
however,
after the Incident he slam-dunked himself back into the hypermasculinity juice bc it was a mindset “safe” from feeling pain, whether his or others’. n since the worlds the admins created dont have the same ideas of gender as the world they came from, once he’s been dethroned romeo has a particularly hard time adjusting wrt That on top of all the other 2750347502730 issues he has to face
anyway flash forward a couple months of being incredibly volatile bc he now has to confront all the terrible things he did and how Dare u make him do that and maybe if hes nasty enough he can provoke someone into killing him and saving him from having to unpack All Of That- (note from @simple-mooshroom-herder​: Xara and Jesse at least grasp that Romeo will probably burn himself out on this bullshit eventually and the best thing to do is interact with him with a certain level of healthy detachment. Eventually he'll see that theres no "getting out of this" and he'll start to do the Work but until then its very frustrating to see that tactic take him nowhere.)
- one day petra notices how he’s constantly staring at all the ppl wearing cute dresses in beacontown and at first she thinks he's being creepy but then realizes that he's not being creepy and actually she knows exactly how he feels bc she also used to look at ppl wearing clothes super not suited for combat like that, like she wished she could wear them too, like if she just didnt have to keep up this image of the Warrior who is Not Soft Ever-
n ok. listen. these worlds have been specifically engineered to be better and kinder than the one the admins came from, and when people mess up- even REALLY mess up- people are generally not only willing to forgive you but support you as you try and get better. it’s instinctual for communities to respond to misdeeds with rehabilitation and reconciliation, rather than retaliation and renunciation (tho its not an overnight thing and it generally takes 1-3 people to spearhead the process, esp if the actions have affected a large group of people). like. ivor created something that almost destroyed the entire world, not just beacontown, yet by the end of season one he’s grown to be a part of the team- n its not just jesse & co being forgiving here, bc when ivor made his s1 build with 3 lava source blocks people objected to it, but by s2 he not only has lava in his build but a giant lake of it. (im assuming the fences around said lake are coming eventually, bc safety is still important, but the implications im choosing to take from this are a) despite almost ending the world people let him into their lives anyway and b) the community not only grew to accept but encourage his self-expression.)
BUT ANYWAY before i go off on that even more one day petra and romeo basically put on an impromptu fashion show in jesse’s house (bc their house is huge and, kind of perfect for a fashion show, and also right next to the order hall’s armory whence they stole a bunch of fancy swords to match the outfits) n theyre having a blast until the hero in residence , returns to their residence (and with COMPANY) n romeo is absolutely Mortified- caught red-handed showing feelings of an almost human nature, oh my god, this will NOT do- n this whole grand soliluquy of shame and excuses and apologies grabs the steering wheel of his tongue but he cant even spit a single syllable out bc jesse and lukas almost immediately dip leaving romeo panicking for a second before they come back with their inventories FULL of cute outfits, including a billion skirts and dresses, some of them are even enchanted so theyre like. super shiny or constantly flowing or things like that.
this actually ends up spiralling into a town-wide... not quite fashion show bc there's no runway or anything, everyone just shows up in their cutest/coolest outfits .. fashion convention?? Anyway several people come up to him and compliment him on his outfit casually before continuing along, not recognizing him not only bc of how hes done his hair and makeup n what hes wearing but he just seems... so happy (he might be wearing something on his head? like a headpiece or hat or something? but also maybe not hmm)- whoever this is, he's not hunched over like he's got several centuries' worth of sins crawling on his back he’s not trying to shrink and make small a human-shaped apology for the simple fact of his existence not dragging his feet like hes ready for, dreading, a hundred mile trek through the desert repenting hes just. hes literally just Vibing
anyway he's mostly been silent or just providing very quiet "thank you"s but when it turns out that some people showed up ready to play music and there's a song that he knows he literally cant help but start jamming out its the GOod Stim everyones a-dancing and a-jiving and some people start to sing and so of course he does too (the healing power of dancing and singing in cute outfits.... unfathomable) but. ppl recognize his voice
and after a few seconds he notices how quiet it's gotten all of a sudden n everyones looking at him like "oh shit thats the admin" and honestly his heart breaks. visibly
but
then someone starts singing, so quiet it takes a moment for him to hear over the sound of an encroaching panic attack (oh god he has airpods in), but when he looks over theyre smiling - theyre smiling at hiM???? AND IT DOESNT EVEN LOOK MEAN??- and doing this very simple step, that he catches onto just as easily as he matches their singing (its a fairly common little tune n dance)
theyre like standing like a good few meters away but as they take turns with lines in the song they slowly inch closer
and he thinks hes starting to recognize the dance that the steps theyre doing is from but at the part in the song thats coming up ur supposed to allemande left and even tho theyre like, less than a meter away now literally no one has really wanted to get close to him, let alone actually touch him, so hes totally expecting them to be like 'psych' and humiliate him in front of the entire crowd-
BUT THEN THEY ACTUALLY GO FOR IT???
he completes the step without even thinking about it n continues onto the next in this state of dull bewilderment where there is but one braincell active in his head and it is just going, in a very tiny voice, "danser?"
- when they linked arms the person briefly seemed surprised that he didn't like, chew their arm off or anything (he had. kind of snapped at people a few times during the past few weeks), but then their shock turned into a wide smile and they sort of- nodded? at someone over his shoulder like 'come and join us, it doesn't look like he's going to kill me after all you guys can put the eulogy writing on hold'
what rly makes his heart do the confused and hopeful conga is that this isnt even anyone romeo knows, its a total stranger. or- like- he saw them while he was pretending to be jesse he just didnt care to get to know them beyond ‘name and gimmick’- its not even someone who has any reason to think he'd be cool to befriend its literally jsut someone taking a chance on him (tkae a chance take a chance take a chance take a cha)
afterwards hes like "i should thank jesse for putting you up to that, it was fun" and theyre like "what? jesse didn't "put me up to" anything, dude, you just looked super choked. * something something surfer lingo who would i be if i just left someone to feel bad when they could be having fun dancing you know?*"
he H
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crispyapplepies · 5 years ago
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Copy pasta improvised terra-slept-with-joshua-and-ven-is-upset-about-it fic i wrote in a discord chat for any terravens willing to overlook the present tense sketch writing, i hope you enjoy the angsty comedy drama --
so by chance, vens assigned gym partner for the day is joshua~ sora is stuck with roxas in the bg which is also amusing if you wanna know the background noise to this xD ven is an utter sweetie and has no personal problem with joshua so hes happy to pick up his slack on their activities today since he understands some people just dont care for athletics, especially when they have pretty looks to preserve for rehearsal tonight^^ at the end of class joshua offers his coy appreciation to ven who was such a cute gentleman today in getting him through that~ and then he makes some remark about how he never wouldve guessed ven even was that physically inclined given what he thought terras taste in men was~ ven lowers an eyebrow and asks "huh? what does that mean? =o=" and joshua chuckles "oh it was a long time ago, nothing to wonder about now~ i will say this though, you my friend? are one very very lucky bottom ;) keep a close eye on him." and then he saunters off to his next class. ven squints =.= hes a lil grumpy now x)
come lunch time, terra and aqua have already sat down at their usual table, seniors come in first, and theyre settled in with aqua going over some extra terms with terra for their history exam. sophomores finally file in and ven marches over with the tray of food he didnt even look at when he was at the counter. terra turns with a smile to see him and plants his usual kiss hello on his cheek as ven sits down with a slight fwomp, not responding to it. terra asks "everything okay? :o" and aqua looks over to check if hes feeling alright, not spotting any signs of sickness. ven responds almost gritting his teeth "i've been better. =_ =" terra tells aqua he'll help her study in a minute, cuz obviously upset boyfriend takes priority<3 he sinks his fingers into vens hair and asks him if he wants to talk about it. and ven takes a deep breath, trying to resume his usual Good Boi Angel attitude, gently swats terras hand away and says "Maybe later, you and aqua can go ahead and study! 8) I'll even help you if you like~" terra recognizes that this is certainly not over but hes not gonna force ven to talk or anything so he kinda nervously says okay.. and then tells aqua "Wanna quiz me?" and aqua says sure, and starts reading off the list of vocab words only for ven to suddenly smack the table and turn sharply to terra and ask "WHEN WERE YOU GONNA TELL ME YOU SLEPT WITH JOSHUA????" and terra just- O//__//O oops.. and aqua looks at terra all disappointed and grossed out and groans "Oh, terra, you didn't... >~<" and terra is so embarrassed and tries to explain to ven's scowl "i-it was a long time ago! really it meant nothing! :'D... a-and besides it was even before I met you! so.. thats- alright?" and he glances over at aqua hoping for some kind of validation but she just goes "ughh..." in the most smh big sister voice xDDD
ven exhales, trying to cool off and be rational, but his usual sweet happy face just cant help being all =_ = at terra, and he says "I guess its- fine, but- gosh, really? joshua? you didnt have feelings for him, did you? er was this just a fling? how long ago was this?" and terra stumbles to answer saying "i-it was- um... back when i first came out! people were telling me i couldnt say i was bi if i'd never had sex with a guy too, so i- had to prove it! thats all, really, it was nothing meaningful to me, honest<3 :'3 I'm not like that." as he cups vens cheeks playfully, but where theres usually a smile between puffed out cheeks theres still just a >:T ven folds his arms and tries again to collect himself and says "i guess i get it.. i guess xT thats really all it was? no more secrets?" and terra swears with his hand up and his eyes closed "I swear thats all it was v_v." aqua shakes her head and tells terra "Youre gonna owe ven preeetty big after this blows over :/" but before ven can even respond terra has already jumped in to tell her "I'll do anything to make ven happy! theres absolutely nothing to worry about~ :')" and ven is still kinda pissed but he finally says "okay. i'll let it go. here aqua, i can read off the list and quiz both of you" and aqua slides ven the paper to read off while she glares at terra who glares back at her as if to say 'drop it =.='
so thats the end of it for the day, and the next day too, but then the next day is gym again, and whatever sora and roxas are struggling with in the bg is still going on xD and ven and joshua are partners again. ven is still not comfortable with the idea of his terra sleeping with joshua, the twink incubus of the school fdkjgh but hes a nice boy so hes going to continue being nice and get joshua through this "drag of an hour, and not even the fun kind" pff joshua can kinda tell ven is pretty tense today though, unusual for him since ven is always the nicest kid in the whole school next to maybe sora. so finally near the end he asks if something's on his mind and ven realizes ack, what am i doing? there is no reason for me to be such a jerk. so he tells joshua "im really sorry, I mean it, I have no business acting like this;; i just- when i found out you slept with terra i was kinda.. uncomfortable about it to say the least, but i have no reason to be, youre perfectly nice :) besides, it was before he even met me so it doubly doesnt matter~^^" but thats where joshua raises an eyebrow. "oh? i think youre a little mixed up there cutie pie~ terra and i had sex together last year. some time after you transferred. I was amazed at the offer, really, i honestly thought that once he met you, none of us other cuties had a chance. but it looks like he landed you in the end, so it is of no matter. but i do certainly hope that you and he are happy, terra is quite the catch and we'll all be quite jealous of you til the end~ catch you around ;)" and thats the end of that conversation. ven. is. livid. 8)
so ven actually skipped lunch with his friends 8) terra looks around curiously, he still isnt showing up and hes not texting him back either. aqua asks him "doesnt ven have gym today?" and terra answers like its a dumb question pff "yeah? its thursday, everybody has gym today. its gym day." and she shakes her head at him and says "I think you should give him some space. im pretty sure i know where he is. :/" terra looks uneasy tho. "do you think hes okay?" and aqua says "oh... im sure he will be." terra grips his arms and tries not to think about it 8)
senior gym class is last period and they start filing in as the juniors file out. terra fist bumps riku on his way in xD terra is practically exempt from whatever is on the activities list cuz hes.. terra and gym class is honestly childs play pff he finishes everything in 2 seconds anyway. so usually the coach just lets him bench press for a while. highschools are bullshit xD aqua has that privilege too but she considers it a warm up before her practice later and does them anyway. terra takes his time prepping the bench, saving himself the trouble of dealing with the crowd in the locker room, and once they all run out he yoinks his gym bag up to his shoulder just to be extra pff and marches on in there to change. weird that everyone is snickering at him on their way out though... he walks inside, humming mindlessly to himself cuz gym class is his chance to relax after school before his practice. and then he half screams in surprise as his gym bag falls to the floor. ven is sitting right there in front of the lockers with the angriest look on his face terra didnt even know he /could/ make jhdfgl ven "sings" out "hello, terra. >8(" and terra just- run kdjfhglhdfsg
terra runs back to the bench as if he can just- run away from reality kdjsfhgljkdfs xDDD and start bench pressing cuz he doesnt know what else to do sdklfjhglsdj im having too much fun with this i love dumb ass jocks and soft cuties xDDD ven launches himself on top of terra pushing down on the weights terra was about to pump up and yells "YOU SLEPT WITH JOSHUA WHILE YOU WERE COURTING ME?!?!?!?!!!!"
(everyone in the gym is cackling quietly to themselves at the display sdfkjgh this AMAZING xD) terra looks up at ven in fear and stutters "I-I didnt think i had a chance with you! you didnt seem interested D:!" ven yells "OF COURSE I WAS INTERESTED YOURE JUST SHIT AT FLIRTING!!!!!!!" terra tries to calm him down "youre gonna break the bench press, ven! D:" the coach comes over at all the yelling and yells at them "HEY, break it up--" only to be shut right up when ven glares at him and growls and terra looks at him utterly terrified dfkjhg and motions for him to leave them alone. the coach is both very scared of ven xD and also doesnt wanna lose his quarterback so he smiles and holds his hands up in surrender and says "hey, you know what? why dont you two work it out amongst yourselves?^^;;; maybe somewhere that isnt my expensive bench press though?" ven yells "FINE." and grabs terra by the wrist and drags him back to the locker rooms using a scary strength terra didnt know he had dkfjglh O_O;; aqua pauses her stretches and shakes her head and mumbles "it was nice knowing you, terra. :/" and then resumes her work out xD
well ven flings terra into the locker room and shuts the door with a slam and chews him out. "DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW HUMILIATING THIS FEELS?!!! YOU SLEPT WITH THAT LITTLE HORNDOG AFTER I CAME HERE AND THEN YOU LIED TO ME ABOUT IT SO I HAD TO FIND OUT FROM THE HORNDOG HIMSELF?!!! GIMME YOUR BEST EXPLANATION FOR THAT, TERRA, JUST TRY ME!!!! >8UUUUUU" terra reaches out his trembling hands bravely to try and calm ven down, before he pulls his hair out and he cries out "I'm SORRY, i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry, okay, I didn't do it to hurt you!!!! It was just a small thing-" "AHAHAH IS THAT WHAT IT IS THEN??? WELL IF IT WAS SUCH A SMALL "tHinG" THEN WHY WOULD YOU LIE TO ME ABOUT IT, WHAT OTHER SECRETS HAVE YOU BEEN KEEPING?!!! DID YOU SLEEP WITH RIKU TOO? ANYMORE CHEERLEADERS I DONT KNOW ABOUT??? OR MAYBE JOSHUA AGAIN AT SOME POINT????!!! >8'DDDD"   ven is about to lose his mind sdjfhg terra is starting to feel upset too ;~; "No, I don't have anymore secrets, after we started dating I havent even so much as THOUGHT of anyone else! I mean that! :'U" he pleas, finally managing to place loving hands on vens shoulders as he prays for forgiveness dkfjhg ven finally just cries it out letting himself sob into his palms and terra steps in closer, hating to see ven cry, and this is much worse knowing hes the cause of it ;-;
ven glances up again, terras scent hitting him and that warm chest right in front of him that he loves and he just buries his face in it not knowing what else to do dkfgh terra holds him, stroking his back, mulling over in his head how many ways he could apologize for this but then ven pushes himself away again, hes still so upset >~< and he sniffles "why. did you lie to me about it." terras face goes red and he fishes for his words "because i- i care what you think ven." ven scoffs, but his frown hardens and he wipes his eyes "you care what i think, and so you LIED to me? what am i supposed to think?" terra replies quickly "i dont know :'u i guess i just didnt want you to think..." ven holds himself and turns away. terra supposes he has to just- be honest then, its worth a try if  it keeps him from losing the love of his life. "Look, I- I lied because the way you look at me matters to much. I care what you think of me more than anyone else, ven." ven sniffles, his back still turned to terra "oh yeah?" and terra glides over to turn him around and look at him, taking vens hands in his. "yes! ven youre the nicest, kindest, most pure hearted person i've ever met. i cant even imagine there being a darkness in your heart. who even says "slept with" and "courted" anymore besides a sweetheart like you? youre like an angel to me, but i- dont have the best reputation anymore. and the number of partners ive had seemed to disgust you. it broke my heart the way you looked at me the other day knowing that id slept with joshua. like you thought i was- i dunno.. im sorry i did it, i really am. i never wouldve done it if i'd known you really did want me too." ven reaches up and places a hand to terras cheek promising "Terra, I think the world of you. i wouldnt be with you if i didnt think you were a great person. the best even! you know how much i admire you. i just- was I just a fling? how do i know im not the next joshua or shiki you sl- have sex with and drop?"
and terra leans down to kiss his forehead and chuckles "because you're you, silly." that gets ven smiling again, the cornier the better with him<3 he presses his nose to terras chest and slides his arms up over his back for a tight hug and terra is so relieved they got through that dkfgjhdjl f ven tells him "I'm sorry for making you feel judged. i was way too rash about that whole thing." terra tells him its alright, imeanididlietoyouafterallahem.. ven goes = _= for just a second, cuz yeah that sure wasnt cool dfkjgh but he removes it cuz mostly hes back to smiling and he pulls himself away to look up at terra again, admitting with a blush "i guess i'm still in disbelief that youre really mine. maybe in 5 years or something i'll believe it" ven chuckles at his joke, but terra smiles down at him very sincerely and says "then i'm counting the years with you til then~" and that just tickles him and he jumps up to give terra make up smooches for a while<3 eventually they emerge from the locker room, ven clearly looking like hed been crying but smiling away again, even feeling okay enough to go to class now, cuz hes a good boy who wouldnt just ditch at that point like i would xD terra looks relieved too. aqua breaks formation when she sees them come out and runs up to ven to ask if hes okay and hug him if he needs, but ven says "everythings fine :) thanks aqua~" and aqua looks up at terra to double check that and terra nods affirmatively that yes, everything is fine. ven nudges aqua "see you at practice today~" and waves at terra too, knowing he prefers not to smooch in front of the other seniors;; but terra tells him to hang on and he runs over to give him a smooch goodbye and all is well after that<3 and axel snarks "tchh- drama queens :/"
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endless-array-of-tom · 6 years ago
Text
Nightmares [loki oneshot]
Pairing: Loki x Reader; Loki x family (angst)
Genre: MAJOR FLUFF AND ANGST
Word Count: Around 2,000 words?
Warning: Starts off with some major angst stuff... I warned you
A/N: I’m off hiatus for a bit, and decided that I would be attempting to continue series and finish up/publish the requests that I got from a lot of people. I apologize for being on hiatus for so long, honestly I wasn’t expecting to be out this long. Anyway, I hope you enjoy the requested oneshot!
Summary: Loki has a nightmare, and goes to the reader to comfort him.
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     Loki’s gaze wandered to the fields of flowers, staring at the weeping willow by the small shimmering lake. Seeing the small figures playing around, his eyes glimmered. Running through the grassy fields, his arms extended forward.
     “Mom! Thor! Odin!” Loki yelled, his pace began to quicken as they turned their heads. A sudden rumbling made Loki’s eyes widen, he gazed at his family.
     “Run! Go!” Loki screamed, his family only smiled and turned, unaware of what was going on around them. The ground shook again, knocking Loki off of his feet. He attempted to stand again, but the quaking of the ground underneath him was too strong. Tears pricked Loki’s eyes as he crawled, his family only a few yards from him.
     The world split into two. The giant hole was right behind his family, their panicked expressions made Loki’s stomach turn.
     His father was the first to fall. Loki clenched his jaw tightly, slowly attempting to stand up. He didn’t know why there was a small feeling of regret when his father fell, but he wasn’t as important to him as the two others-- who seemed too horrified to move. His knees were buckling beneath him--but he ignored his aching body.
     His brother and mother began to lose their balance. Loki’s vision was soon clouded, as his breaths began to come uneasy. Leaping outward, he grabbed his mother’s and brother’s hand as they began to fall, holding them as his life depended on it. The veins in his arms popped instantly, a rush of adrenaline coursing through his body as he stared at them.
     “I can’t go…” his brother muttered,“... not like this.” Loki’s arms were trembling, his body slowly starting to slip into the hole. Loki’s mother, Frigga, gazed at him, tears forming in her eyes.
     “Honey. Let us go.” Loki shook his head furiously, biting his lower lip. He soon tasted a metallic fluid but refused to think about anything else.
     “I-I c-can’t,” Loki croaked out. “I’ll lose you. I’ll save you. I can do it.” Loki’s arms burned; his whole body began to feel like it was set ablaze. He couldn’t lose them. They were all he had left in this cruel world-- as much as he refused to believe it, pushing them away every chance he got. The truth was now revealed in the worst case scenario. He closed his eyes, squeezing them shut.
     “Look at me, brother.” His brother rasped, Loki complied. The first thing he saw was his brother’s icy blue eyes, and how they were filled with sorrow. Loki’s never saw that look on his brother’s face.
     They were always filled with hope.
     Joy...
     Happiness...
     Faith...
     “Loki…” his brother trailed on. “I want you to know… that I love you. I really do. I want you to know that--no matter what, I’ll still keep my promise to you. I’ll watch over you, I’ll protect you. But I need you to be strong.” Loki began to wail, he didn’t want to hear the ending, he shook his head frantically.
     “No. Don’t finish it. I don’t want to hear-”
     “Loki. I want you, to let us go. Live your life that you dreamed of Loki, you think I didn’t see the journals you secretly kept in your chambers?
     “Do what you want Loki. Mother, father, and I--we’ll watch over you from above. And when the time is right--we’ll become a family again. But that won’t happen for a very long time.” Loki stared at his brother’s eyes, seeing the small tears drip down.
     His brother didn’t cry. Because he was strong… so the fact that he was now…
     “Loki, sweetie.” His mother interjected, she brought her other hand up to touch his cheek, Loki tilted his head to her hand, feeling the warmth emitting from it. Tears brimmed from the corners of his eyes.
     “You’ll do great things, never forget that. No matter what anyone says, what anyone might do--you trust your own instincts. We’ll be beside you through your journey, and we’ll help you guide you to your happy ending.
     “I love you, my son. But it’s time for your family to go.” Her grip on his hand began to loosen, Loki panicked.
     “NO! You can’t do this to me! I don’t want you to leave! Don’t leave me! I’ll be able to help! We’ll all be safe-”
     “Loki. Ever since you were little, you despised the word ‘goodbye’, so let’s just say we’ll see you later. Far from now. But we’ll see you eventually. Remember that.” His brother said, loosening his grip as well. Loki’s eyes flooded with tears, tightening his grip on their wrists.
     “You’re not leaving me alone! I can’t be alone! I-I-I won’t be able to h-handle it. Who’s going to teach me to do things? Tell me to take risks? Who am I supposed to look to when I-I’m vulnerable. I-I can’t do this. I want to come with you.” Loki blurted.
     “You’ll do remarkable things without us. Good people who care for you will guide you--and you’ll have great allies along the way. Trust me, Loki.” His mother said reassuringly. Her grip loosened more. “I love you.” His brother’s grip loosened as well.
     “Do well, little brother. Remember--there’s nothing you can’t accomplish.”
     Loki’s mind went blank. The ringing in his ears multiplied, uncontrollably shaking.
     They were gone.
     Loki gasped, jolting from his position in the bed. He grabbed an old mirror; his tear-stained face was disgusting. He looked at the mirror again, seeing the little boy with onyx bangs covering his eyes, his smile brighter than the sun itself. And beside him, were his two parents and elder brother, holding hands with one another. He threw the mirror across the room, hearing it shatter against the wall. He grabbed his tunic, squeezing it tightly.
     He couldn’t breathe.
     His hair stuck to his forehead, he scoffed. He hated his onyx hair. It reminded him too much of them. He checked the time, realizing that he wouldn’t be able to get any shut-eye before his day began.
     His feet moved on their own. Making their way off into the bathroom sink, he twisted the handle, watching the water pour into the drain. He cupped his hands, letting the water fill them--the cold temperature making him feel more empty. He brought the water to his face, letting the cold feeling spread. He turned off the sink and ruffled his hair. He looked up, staring at his reflection.
     “Remember--there’s nothing you can’t accomplish.”
     “But I couldn’t save you.” Loki breathed out. “If I was able to accomplish anything, I wouldn’t feel so broken inside. I would’ve been able to save you, to hold you all.” He stared at his reflection, his bottom lip trembling. “I would’ve been able, to tell you all how much I appreciated you. But I was too selfish to admit that I did.”
     “If I could accomplish anything--I should’ve told you all I loved you. Even when I knew I wasn’t going to be able to see you all for a long time. I could’ve even tell them ‘I love you’ back.”
     Staring at the picture frame, he frowned at the old memory.
     “I’ll see you later, mother.” He muttered, leaving his chambers… “because you never liked goodbyes.”
     He blamed himself for his mother’s death, although he hated to admit it. If he wasn’t corrupted in such ways and shown the bloody monster to the staircase-- she would still be alive-- supporting her idiotic son. His mother was someone truly there for him, and someone that would stick along with him while his father would rant about Thor’s excellence.
     He made his way out of his room, his feet moving on their own. He moved through the empty streets of New York, the flashing lights reminding him of his nightmare.
     Slowly trudging up the driveway, he noticed it began to drizzle slightly. Hearing the rain, he smiled and looked up to the sky.
     He paused his movements, letting the rain fall onto his body.
     “Loki! What are you doing?” A voice interrupted his thoughts, one that seemed extremely worried. Loki opened his eyes, face-to-face with a cross figure.
     “What did I tell you about standing in the rain? Get inside for crying out loud!” The figure bickered, pushing Loki into their house. Slamming the door shut, the figure sighed.
     “I have a change of clothes for you, from the last time you were here.” Loki nodded his head, silent. The figure immediately picked this up but decided not to ask right away.
     “I’ll make us a cup of tea while you change-- after, we can talk about it. Is that all right?” The figure asked, cupping Loki’s cheek. Ice cold.
     Loki nodded, grabbing the change of clothes and made his way to the bathroom.
     “Thank you, (Y/N),” Loki whispered, kissing the top of (Y/N)’s forehead. (Y/N) hummed in response, making their way to the kitchen.
     When Loki arrived in the kitchen, (Y/N) had set the kettle down on their dining table, pouring the hot liquid into two teacups. Turning their attention to Loki, they grinned sadly.
     “Have a seat, Loki. I have all night.” Loki nodded and sat in his chair, grasping the teacup gently. Taking a sip of the sweet substance, he stared at (Y/N).
     “I presume you’re here because the incident occurred again?” Loki nodded slowly in response; (Y/N)’s eyes widened, setting his/her cup down on the saucer. Loki stared at the ground, hearing a chair scrape against the floor. Two hands grasped his, making Loki stare at the figure.
     (Y/N) smiled softly, sitting on Loki’s lap. Wrapping his/her arms around Loki’s torso, [s]he buried his/her face in Loki’s neck, inhaling his scent softly. Rubbing his lower back in small, calming circles, they began to hum softly.
     Loki wrapped his arms around her/him as well, listening to their voice. The silence of the atmosphere soothed him, his breathing beginning to get closer.
     (Y/N) removed themselves from Loki minutes later, leading him to their bed.
     Making their way out of the room, Loki grasped his/her hand tightly.
     “Don’t leave me too,” he pleadingly spoke out. (Y/N) inhaled deeply, tucking herself/himself into bed beside Loki.
     “I won’t Loki, you know I won’t.” Loki frowned at (Y/N)’s statement; would she be around him… and for how long?
     Loki wrapped his arms around (Y/N) tightly, his demeanor changed completely when he was down and depressed.
     In the morning, he knew that he would be back to being a sarcastic know-it-all, teasing his lover to the brink of exhaustion; but in moments like this, he knew he could depend on (Y/N).
     (Y/N) knew that Loki was someone who needed a lot of comforts, he had experienced so much as a child, and not to mention his life overall. And (Y/N) wanted to there for him, not out of pity, but as a sign of commitment; that he/she cared for Loki so dearly, that they were willing to embrace Loki’s differences, and help him overcome his demons he had troubles dealing with.
     It wasn’t hard either. Loki didn’t like to converse about it-- unless he was completely distraught, the sheer touch of someone he cared for around him, was enough to comfort him in the toughest times he faced nowadays.
     You stared at Loki’s sleeping figure, sighing to yourself. No matter how much he did, or what he did, you still loved him; even after all the damn things, he put you through.
     Grabbing your phone, you quickly messaged Tony.
[13:02] FYI, I’m going to be with Loki for a while, so don’t send the damn Avengers like you did last time.
[13:10] All right, thanks (Y/N).
     Shutting off your phone, you smiled and cuddled closer next to Loki. You loved him, everything about him made you feel like you were soaring. And you would do anything to make him feel happy and know that he had a place in the world.
     Your eyelids began to drop slowly, losing consciousness.
...
     What you didn’t know-- was that something bigger was about to emerge from the unknown, and test your limits…
thank you, next request should be up soon!
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tomakeitbeautifultolive · 6 years ago
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Ok two months to go lets hear it: Who lives and who dies?
My death list is actually kind of short, but (probably) controversial:
The Mountain
Beric Dondarrion
Melisandre
Varys
Viserion
Cersei Lannister
Jaime Lannister
Jorah Mormont
Euron Greyjoy
Theon Greyjoy
The Night King
Sansa Stark
Jon Snow*
(*but he will be resurrected)
You’ll notice one very big name - perhaps the biggest - happens to be absent from my list. I’m not so sure I believe the leaks. *shrug*
My explanations and reasoning under the cut.
The Mountain
Of course, The Mountain is already dead, so this feels little redundant. I don’t think Cleganebowl is happening. The Mountain isn’t the same person Sandor had beef with, and Sandor isn’t the same person he once was. *shrug* I’m personally rooting for the Arya-takes-down-the-Mountain theory.
Varys
There’s a good chance that Melisandre is wrong about Varys’ death (like she’s wrong about well, almost everything):
“I have to die in this strange country, just like you.”
But we pair that with the line from Daenerys:
“If you ever betray me, I’ll burn you alive” 
…and it seems to seal his fate (I don’t buy for a second he’s got allegiance to anyone but himself). Of course, there’s a chance it could be a line foreshadowing someone else’s death that’s been ‘leaked’. We’ll see!
Viserion
I could argue that Viserion is already dead… but since “(The Night King)’s done the same thing to Viserion that he did with Craster’s sons,” I assume he’s a dragon version of an other. That’s probably not too important, anyway.
I think Viserion will be taken down by Drogon, mirroring Viserys and Drogo *shrug* I love my parallels, don’t I?
Cersei Lannister
When you play the game of thrones, you win or you die. Eh, eh?
For as much as everyone cries “cliche!” about Jaime being the valonqar, imagine if all that foreshadowing was traded in for some shock value, and someone like Sansa does it. *shudders* Nah, man. I want Jaime to mirror himself - the Kingslayer/Queenslayer who took down both mad monarchs threatening to ignite King’s Landing in green flames - finally getting recognized for his act of heroism. That’s much more satisfying than a quick shock that has no buildup. But I suppose, there is a pretty good chance the valonqar is Euron.
(Though I do admit - I would actually love for Cersei Lannister to make it out of this alive, somehow)
Jaime Lannister
“I cannot die while Cersei lives. We will die together as we were born together.”
Both twins have weird lines like this. So, it’s fair to assume if one dies, they both die. And if one lives, they both live. So if Cersei is brought down, Jaime will be, too. How do I see it happening? Perhaps by one last (poisonous) kiss - wherein Brienne comes in to cradle him as the life drains from his body? I dunno. But after all, he wants to die in the arms of the woman he loves, and for better or worse - that’s Brienne.
Jorah Mormont
It’s been long speculated that in season 8, we’ll be seeing a ‘beloved’ character turn into a wight - and I think the best candidate is Jorah Mormont (keep in mind we’re talking show Jorah, who is leagues better than book Jorah).
Admittedly, I do notoriously give D&D more credit than like, anyone else around here. That said - I’m not sure the polar bear thing was entirely for “coolness” factor, like they claim. The moment I heard this line, followed by Jorah looming eerily over Beric…
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I thought for sure we’d see this paid off in the very same episode. To me, it just seems wildly out of place and a waste of dialogue. I hope it’s some clever foreshadowing that we’re going to see a dead 'Bear’ of Bear Isle biting someone next season.
Of course, there is always a chance that the greyscale might play some sort of role in preventing Jorah from turning… I guess we’ll see!
Lastly, I’ve always been intrigued by Jon holding a Mormont shield during the BotB - I have a tendency to read too much into everything, I admit - but wouldn’t it be great if Jorah died saving Jon’s hide?
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Euron Greyjoy & Theon Greyjoy
For as formidable as book Euron may be - I don’t see him living. This series just isn’t about evil prevailing. What I think he will do, however, is attack Jon and/or Daenerys at sea, perhaps as they try to flee the north. I’m one of those annoying people who thinks very few lines of dialogue are wasted in-show, and this one is a fucking thorn in my side:
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I think Theon will succeed in taking down Euron (I think this scene is a great foreshadowing that he’s going to save house Greyjoy by saving Yara), but it will likely be at the cost of his own life. I suspect he’ll not only save Yara - but perhaps some members of his other house, too. After all, he’s a Greyjoy and he’s a Stark.
The Night King
Oh, this one is fun, isn’t it? I’m probably the only person who doesn’t want the Night King to die - but I’m pretty sure he will and that I know how it’ll happen. First, we’ll finally get to see Vladimír Furdík’s stuntwork paid off in the final season, which almost ensures there will be an epic showdown between Jon and the Night King.
But you shouldn’t want Jon to defeat him! (Or Daenerys, for that matter!) Why?
“The gods hate kinslayers, even when they kill unknowing.”
This quote is specifically told to Jon by Ygritte when she recounts the tale of Bael the Bard. Interestingly, Bael the Bard heavily mirrors Rhaegar x Lyanna. And what also happens to mirror Lyanna, is how Sam and Jon become friends. Jon comes to his rescue as he’s getting his ass whooped by his fellow black brothers - just like his momma coming to Howland Reed’s aid. Both Jon and Lyanna go out of their way to further humiliate the tormenters, too.
I predict the Night King will disarm Jon Snow and in this crucial moment, and that’s when Sam the Slayer will thrust Heartsbane through his back (perhaps melted down into more wieldable daggers by Gendry?), Howland Reed-style, saving Jon’s life and frankly, blowing everyone’s minds.
Because after all…
“Everything that happens will be something that you’ve seen before.”
Buuuut it’s going to be about as satisfying as Arthur Dayne’s demise - as we’re going to learn of the Night King’s history, and perhaps that his death marked not only the death of the wights and white walkers - but all of Craster’s sons, perhaps wiping out a whole misunderstood race.
‘A villain is the hero of the other side’, after all - and if you’re familiar with my theory that the Night King is the one using his greenseeing powers to manipulate the visions in the flames that the followers of R'hllor see… then this line by Beric might foreshadow his death:
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And that our heroes, the 'enemy’, will win.
Sansa Stark
Before anyone comes for me, there’s a fair amount of eerie foreshadowing - at least in the books. If the season 7 script leaks are to be believed, Sansa might still be the 'lone wolf’ she warned against last season, distancing herself from her family out of jealousy or paranoia.
The way I see it going down, though, (if it does at all) the Stark girls will mirror their direwolves - and Sansa just might die in her sister’s place, saving her life.
Jon Snow
First, let’s look at the conversation between Jon and Melisandre prior to the Battle of the Bastards:
“Any advice?”
“Don’t lose.”
“If I do, if I fall don’t bring me back.”
“I’ll have to try.”
“I’m ordering you not to bring me back.”
“I am not your servant, Jon Snow.”
“You’re in my camp. I’m the commander.”
“I serve the Lord of Light. I do what he commands.”
“How do you know what he commands?”
“I interpret his signs as well as I can.”
“If the Lord didn’t want me to bring you back, how did I bring you back? I have no power. Only what he gives me and he gave me you. Why? I don’t know. Maybe you’re only needed for this small part of his plan and nothing else. Maybe he brought you here to die again.”
Other than that, we’ve got some fucked up lines from Sansa:
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(Thanks, Sansa. Great job.)
As well as Beric:
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Alternatively, there is some amazing book foreshadowing that Jon will live.
Why include in the story Beric has come back from the dead multiple times, at all? Why tell us that each time he comes back, he’s a bit less of himself? He’s not a major character. Is it all just for 'flavor’ - or are we being groomed to see it happen again to someone we love?
And how bittersweet would that be - seeing Jon come back a second time, but not quite the man he used to be - the one we all grew to love.
I love the theory that Jon Snow is Dany’s mount, treason, and fire for love - and that she’s the one who commits treason against him, by possibly demanding he be brought back 'against his will’ (though, considering he’s a father-to-be and potential newlywed, I don’t think he’ll gripe about it as much in season 8 as he would’ve in season 6.)
When Jon died the first time - I thought for sure he’d come back in some blaze of glory. That they’d try to burn his body, but he’d have this epic 'Unburnt’ moment, like Dany (lol). I’d like to see Dany wake a dragon a second time with some sort of similar funeral pyre that she walks into… except that two people walk out instead of one.
I know, I know. *adjusts tinfoil hat*
But Sam Tarly happens to agree with me:
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Always.
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Beric Dondarrion
Considering the man gave his life long ago for Catelyn to become Lady Stoneheart in the books, I think his entire purpose for still kickin’ around in Season 8 is to give someone the 'Last Kiss’. Not really a unique idea, no. Popular candidates tend to be Sandor (after all, he tells him 'We will meet again’), Daenerys, or one of the Stark kids. But my money’s on Jon.
Melisandre
I’m an atheist (like GRRM), and therefore, I more or less despise Melisandre for basically convincing what used to be a good man to burn his daughter alive. That’s some Abraham and Isaac shit right there (and that shit better happen in the books because it’s powerful AF commentary and I’m here for it).
All that said, what I’d love to happen with Melisandre is to see her realize her god isn’t real (assuming the Night King has been messing with her visions), and have a personality crisis/breakdown. Afterward, if my theory about Jon happens to be true, she’ll play a role in bringing him back, perhaps even lending her life in the process. Buuuut I wouldn’t mind Gendry’s future wife avenging his cousin’s death and closing her 'blue eyes’ forever.
As for the rest…
People I’m unsure will live or die:
Drogon 🤞
Ghost 🤞
Nymeria 🤞
Davos Seaworth 🤞
Tyrion Lannister 🤞
Sandor Clegane 🤞
Grey Worm 🤞
Bronn
Ned Umber
Alys Karstark
People I think will live:
Samwell Tarly
Gilly
Daenerys Targaryen
Arya Stark
Bran Stark
Little Sam
“Boatbaby”
Rhaegal
Gendry
Missandei
Jon Snow (resurrected)
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