#there's a sense of being thrown when looking at it

[jeonginsleftcheek]

Twisted

pairing: lee felix x afab!reader

genre: fluff, smut, thriller

wc: 6.6k

synopsis: felix and you live a normal, happy life as a couple. until you start noticing little things that make no sense. felix calls you silly for thinking anything could ever be wrong in your perfect little world. is he being honest or harboring a bigger secret?

warnings: unprotected sex, creampie, oral(f), two plot twists!!, dark ending!

a/n: i can't really put all of the warnings here bcs i would spoil the plot twist but i hope you enjoy this one hehehe🤭🫶🏻

divider by: @cafekitsune

~masterlist

There is nothing more beautiful than waking up next to the person you love.

Traces of last night's loving and passionate activities linger in the air all around you as your limbs are entwined with his, not knowing where you begin and where he ends; almost like you've merged into one person.

You stir a little, the warmness of his naked body pressed against yours makes your heart dance inside your chest and your core throb with the everlasting craving you have for Felix.

Your eyes flutter open and you look at him, his hair a royal mess, the strands falling over his forehead and into his eyes, where his eyelashes kiss his freckled skin, his plump lips slightly parted as he cutely drools on the pillow.

You chuckle a little and that stirs him up, he smacks his lips together as you lay on your tummy, facing him, his leg thrown over you.

Felix cracks one eye open and smiles instantly, his fingertips dancing on your back, all along your spine.

"Morning, sweets." his voice is even deeper when he wakes up, but still dripping with honey.

"Morning, love." you whisper and his smile widens, making him look even cuter to you so you lean in and press your lips to his forehead.

Your hand caresses his hair out of the way as your lips repeatedly collide with his skin, kissing his eyebrows, eyelids, nose, all of his starry freckles.

Felix giggles at the onslaught of love, giddy as his arm curls around your waist, bringing you even closer to him.

You enjoy the quiet moment before you have to get up and start your day, face the real world.

As your hands gently caress each other's skin, both of you become hungry for more, hungry to become one like you did last night, more than once.

Felix's breaths are shaky as he ruts his middle against your thigh, his hot leaky cock dragging against your plushy flesh.

You moan quietly as your hand explores his soft skin and Felix maneuvers you so your back is facing him.

"Wanna hold you." he murmurs into your hair, adjusting your leg before he sinks his cock into you easily, your cunt always ready to take him in.

Felix buries himself inside your warmth, holding you tightly as his lips attach to your neck and whisper words of love in your ear.

You melt into his embrace, letting him rock against you, his cock sliding in and out of your wetness in a steady rhythm, his arm wrapped around you as his fingers press on your clit.

Euphoria soon takes you both over as you spill into each other, all wet and warm, full of love.

"I love you, sweetheart." he kisses your shoulder and arm gently.

"I love you too." you turn to smile at him.

Yes, nothing is more beautiful than this moment right here.

-

"Lixie! Are you done getting ready?" you yell out from the hallway.

"Yes! I'm coming, babe." he yells back from your room before he comes skipping down the steps with a big smile on his face.

You chuckle at him as he jumps right in front of you, cupping your cheeks and pressing his lips into yours, a wet smooch sound echoing off the walls.

"You're so cute." your face is warm as you giggle at him.

"That's you." he pinches your cheek, making you whine a little.

"So, do you like my outfit?" he asks with a little spin, a bright smile on his face.

"Of course, you look very handsome." you giggle.

"Don't I always?" he wiggles his eyebrows and you roll your eyes at him playfully.

"Why is this new diner so special that you're sooo excited about it?" you ask as the two of you make your way out of your house.

Felix swings your linked hands and smiles.

"You'll see. I know you'll love it." his eyes shine as he beams at you.

"Fine, I trust you." you say and he brings your hand to his lips, kissing your knuckles gently.

It's another beautiful sunny day, the birds are chirping in the trees, there is no trace of clouds in the sky, everyone around you seems to be happy, wearing big smiles and saying a polite 'good morning' as you pass them by.

You smile too, enjoying the sun's warmth as Felix yaps about a new video game he discovered recently.

Come to think of it, you don't remember the last time it rained or snowed.

While you ponder this, Felix notices your absent-mindedness and nudges you.

"You're not listening to me." he pouts.

"Sorry, I was just thinking how it's been sunny for so long that I almost forgot what it's like when it rains." you chuckle and Felix's eyes widen for a moment.

"Oh- I mean, isn't that good?" he asks, licking at his lip nervously.

"Sure, but it'd be nice to get some rain now and then." you shrug, looking around.

"I'm sure it'll rain soon." Felix is more quiet than usually when he says that but you pay no mind as the mysterious diner he'd been raving all week about finally comes into view.

"Felix!" you exclaim, grabbing at his arm, a big smile spreading on your face upon seeing what all the rave was about.

Your boyfriend's demeanor changes instantly as he perks up, a big smile on his face.

"It's a space themed diner!" you clap excitedly as you near the entrance.

"Mhm. Just what you love." Felix's eyes sparkle as he looks at your face adoringly. "Are you happy?" he adds.

"Happy? I'm estatic!" you practically skip the rest of the distance as Felix trails behind you with a satisfied smile on his face.

Seeing you like this is the biggest gift he could ever have the honor to indulge in, it's all he needs.

To see you happy.

You hurry inside and the interior of the diner makes you gasp.

The walls are filled with beautiful space paintings and photographs, the ceiling is made of some kind of big screen that has an entire galaxy lighting up here and there, as if all the little stars are actually shining above your heads, spacecraft oval shaped chandeliers hang from the stars, the little lights inside them shining with different colors of the rainbow.

The whole diner seems to be presented as the Solar System, each booth belonging to one planet and designed according to colors and traits of the planet.

Everything seems shiny and sparkly, some experimental electronic music is playing from the speakers as the waiters rush around, all dressed in shiny suits, with cute space details sewn into them.

The place is packed but as if it was waiting for you, the booth inspired by Jupiter, your favorite planet, is empty.

"Shall we?" Felix smiles, reaching his hand out to you.

You nod fervently, still trying to process the entire design of the diner, your heart dancing inside your chest happily.

Felix chuckles and leads you to the booth and as soon as you sit down, an automated voice starts talking from the little speaker on the wall.

"Welcome to Jupiter, the gas giant of our Solar System! It is primarily made out of gases and liquids so your feet won't really touch any ground but that's okay, you can always float along! Just be careful not to get swept away by the famous cyclonic storm called the Great Red Spot, hehe! Fun fact: Jupiter has 80 moons!" the voice talks.

"Startled me at first." you chuckle. "Actually, Jupiter has 95 moons discovered, as of lately. I guess they didn't update the fun fact." you add and Felix frowns.

"Hm." he purses his lips and you giggle. "How could they not update it?"

"It's okay, it's not that big of a deal." you giggle at his pouty face.

Before he can answer, a waiter appears next to your table.

"Hello, my fellow space explorers! I'm glad to see you've chosen Jupiter as your destination today. Take a look at the selection on our menu, it's just out of this world!" the waiter laughs, putting down your menus and twirling around as he walks away giving you some time to decide.

"This place is so kooky." you laugh in delight and your boyfriend smiles at you.

"You like it, right?" he asks.

"I love it, Lixie." you confirm and Felix's face becomes brighter again.

"I wanna try the Milky Way shake." Felix says as he skims through the menu.

"Yeah, we can get a big one, share it?" you blink at him and he melts.

"Of course. What do you wanna eat?" he asks.

"Um- the trip to the moon pancakes sound yummy."

"Ooh, I will get the andromeda cake then and we can share and taste both."

After placing your order, you look around, marvelling at the way they thought about every little detail as whoever made this put a lot of thought into this diner and is obviously a space lover like you.

Your eyes fall to another booth, the Mars one, hues of orange and red swirling on the wall and the seats as your eyes follow the intricate design all the way to the woman sitting in the booth with another woman, perhaps a friend, perhaps her lover.

Something seemed off, though.

The woman was taking sips from her glass, but it seemed like no matter how many times she sipped, the liquid inside didn't move.

Again, she took a big sip and you could see her throat move as she swallowed but the same amount of red liquid with little golden sparkles inside it remained.

You don't know why you were fixating on such a little detail, but it was so peculiar.

"What is it? You like the Mars booth more?" Felix follows your eyes.

"N-no. Just... nevermind." you smile at him. "I'm just looking at the different designs. They're all so pretty." you settle on saying.

"I'm glad- I mean yeah they are." he smiles at you.

Your Milky Way shake arrives along with your food, and everything looks sparkly and delicious, decorated with little edible stars and edible glitter.

Felix and you talk about nonsense, relaxed and full of laughter as you share the shake, sipping from it at the same time.

The way he stares at you, his eyes dark and intense yet so soft and full of love, makes your stomach do backflips every time he's this close to you.

After the delicious brunch, the two of you decide to take a walk to a nearby park, wanting to catch some fresh air and stretch your legs.

Felix's arm is wrapped around your shoulders as you melt into him, your arm wrapped around his waist.

"Ugh Felix, what day is it today?" you suddenly feel confused.

"It's Thursday. Why?" he chuckles.

"Weren't you supposed to be at work?" your brain struggles to remember if he said he had a day off or not.

"Y/n, don't be silly. I have the whole week free, remember? We said we'd spend as much time as we can together."

"Right." you chuckle, your memory refreshed. "Silly me. Must be the Milky Way shake with the way I'm spacing out."

Felix laughs at your pun as you wiggle your eyebrows at him.

The world is so beautiful with the sound of his laughter gracing it and with his attention focused only on you.

With warmness in your heart, you return to your home.

-

You work from home, so as soon as you arrive back at your house, you sit down at your desk.

You feel bad for not helping Felix with dinner but he reassures you that he doesn't mind cooking a meal for the two of you, in fact, it makes him happy.

Retreating into your home office, you began working.

Exhaustion takes you over after a few hours, not even realizing what time it is until there's a knock on your door.

"Y/n, love? Dinner is ready." it's Felix's warm deep voice and you turn to look at him, a smile on your face instantly.

"Okay, I'll be down in a few minutes-"

"Babe, you've done enough. Come on, you need to eat something." Felix makes his way to you, his hand gentle on your upper back as he caresses you.

You melt into his touch instantly, thoughts of continuing to work disperse immediately.

"Okay." you chuckle as he leans down to kiss your forehead gently.

The food is delicious like always and as you keep eating, the sky outside darkens suddenly.

You squint your eyes, lifting your head up to look out the window.

"Oh!" you exclaim as thunder rolls in.

Felix turns his head towards the sound, seemingly unphased but there is a small smirk dancing on his lips that you miss.

"Looks like it's gonna rain after all." he says.

"Yeah." you quip, a weird feeling settling in your stomach.

You decide to ignore it, it's a coincidence that it started raining just when you thought about it, it's not like you predicted the weather or something.

"Did you enjoy dinner?" Felix smiles and you nod.

"Of course, it was delicious. I'm not letting you wash the dishes alone though." you point at him jokingly.

"It's fine, sweetheart." Felix is quick to shake his head as he starts cleaning out the table.

"No, you cooked. Let me be useful for something at least."

"You are useful."

"You know what I meant." you say and he nods, the two of you settling on washing the dishes together.

As you're putting the last plate in its place, Felix appears behind you, pressing his body into yours as his arms wrap around you.

He whines, nuzzling his face in your neck as goosebumps rise on your skin and you melt into him.

"Hello there." you giggle.

"Mm." his lips attach to your neck, leaving gentle kisses and you lean your head back on his shoulder, giving him more space.

"Let's shower together." you suggest and Felix hums against you with a smirk.

It's a daily routine you have, any moment you don't have to spend apart, you spend together including showering.

If someone gave Felix the chance, he would quit his job and just be your boyfriend.

He often thought about that, spending every second of the day with you, even while you work, he'd be content in sitting quietly next to you.

He'd have you all to himself, forever.

But, real life gets in the way but he concludes that that's what makes every moment you are with him even more precious.

"Let me help you, sweetheart." his voice drips with honey again as he turns your back to him while the two of you stand under the shower.

Shivers run up your spine as his fingertips slide on your back.

He grabs your shampoo, pouring it on his hands before he starts washing your hair.

You relax into his touch, loving the way he always takes care of you. His hands are gentle but firm as he massages the bubbles into your scalp before rinsing it off.

As you lean back into him, his semi-hard cock brushes against your backside and you chuckle.

"Someone's getting excited." you look back at him with a playful smirk.

"Can you blame me? My beautiful girlfriend is naked right in front of me." he smiles somewhat of an innocent smile, a contrast to the steamy atmosphere shaping between you.

His arms wrap around you as he pulls your body flush against his, making you shiver.

"I need you, my sweet." he whispers, bumping his nose with yours, lips brushing against you.

"Lixie." his hands roam on your body, as you wrap your arms around his shoulders. "Let's go to bed, hm? I love the thought of shower sex but last time you slipped and almost cracked your head open on the tiles and I really don't want to go through that again."

Felix whines in embarassment, burying his face in your neck as he tightens his hold on you.

"That was one time. All the other times were fine." he pouts against your skin.

"I don't wanna see you hurting, come on." you say and he reluctantly follows you out of the shower.

After drying off, Felix whisks you away to your bedroom, almost throwing you down on the soft bed as you squeal, the room filled with laughter.

"My sweetheart." he coos at you, his hand cupping your cheek as his thumb swipes on your skin.

Before you can say anything, his plump lips are on yours as he kisses you lovingly, passionately, possessively, his tongue pushing inside and swirling around yours, taking your breath away.

You clutch onto him as he lowers his middle into yours, grinding his hardening cock against your wet pussy.

He keeps kissing you and swallowing your moans, as his tip catches your entrance a few times but he keeps grinding against you.

"L-Lix, need you." you whimper in frustration, wanting him to fill you up.

"Yeah? My baby needs me?" he smirks and you whimper again.

"Yes, please. Need you inside me." you bat your eyelashes at him, trying to look as cute as possible even though Felix would kiss the ground you walked on if you told him to.

"Such a good girl. Asking so nicely." he keeps smirking before grabbing his cock and slowly sinking into your heat.

Both of you moan at the feeling as he slowly pushes in, bottoming out and fitting snuggly inside you.

Felix tries, he really does, he tries to be gentle but you feel so damn good clenching around him, keeping his cock inside you, your legs and arms wrapped around him as he fucks into your sweet spot.

"Ah!" you exclaim as Felix picks up his speed, his hips snapping into you as he presses your knees to your shoulders, coming down on you with all his weight.

Your eyes roll in the back of your head as he fucks you relentlessy, making you cum in mere minutes.

"Shit, baby you're so wet." Felix looks down at his cock, the white cream of your pleasure painted on his length.

He grunts deeply before fucking into you again, the squelching sounds making your face and ears burn.

Your boyfriend is like a bunny in heat, never stopping or slowing down, making his cock slip out of you on accident as he keeps wilding above you.

A little whimper escapes his lips, missing your heat immediately as he grabs his length and pushes back into you, resuming his ruthless pace.

"Mm, yeah, take it." he groans and all you can do is moan as you let him have his way with you.

"F-Felix!" you moan as he brings you to your second orgasm.

"Yeah, say my name baby." he smirks as he pounds into you.

You keep moaning his name as you climax, getting his cock even more wet which in return makes him even crazier for you.

You're sure the bed will break with the force he's fucking you with, his cock slipping out of you a few more times, making him whimper every time it happens.

He grips your hips, thrusting into you erratically as his cock twitches inside you.

"Gonna give you my cum." his voice is whiny and high-pitched, breathless from the exertion.

"Yes, fill me up, Lixie!" you whimper and he cums, buried deep inside you as your pussy milks his cock down to the last drop.

Felix collapses on top of you and you hold each other, as you listen to the sound of the rain hitting the glass.

"Isn't it weird that it started raining as soon as I mentioned it?" you swallow, staring out the window, your hands drawing random patterns on Felix's back.

You feel him tense in your hold before he lets out a chuckle.

"No, maybe you heard it on the news and subconsciously thought about it or something. Or maybe..." he turns to look at you, his cheek leaned on your breast. "Maybe you have superpowers and you can predict the future." Felix wiggles his eyebrows playfully and you let out a snort.

"Oh sure, that sounds highly likely." you shake your head as he lifts up and kisses you.

"I love you." he smiles after attacking you with sweet kisses.

"I love you, Lixie." you cradle his face.

"Guess we gotta shower again?"

The next morning, you were woken up by Felix's lips on your inner thighs as he made his way to your core.

"Lix..." you mutter half asleep and he only hums in response, lips ghosting over your panties before pressing a kiss to your cunt.

"L-Lixie!" you whine when his tongue darts out to lick at the damp spot on the fabric.

"Relax, baby, let me take care of you." your eyes flutter closed again as he slips off your underwear, his lips wrapping around your clit immediately.

As always, Felix is hungry for you, like he can never get enough of your taste and the way you feel against his tongue, the way you grip his hair or press your thighs around his head.

He ruts against the bedsheets as you slide your middle against tongue, gripping his hair.

He moans into you, the vibrations helping you get closer to the edge as he digs his nails into your plushy thighs.

Fireworks explode from the inside, spilling your sweet juices on Felix's tongue and chin.

"Mm, baby." he whines against your cunt, lapping you up and leaving more kisses on your clit and all along your folds.

"Sensitive..." you whimper and he leans back before lifting up and hovering over you.

"I couldn't help myself, you just looked so sweet while sleeping." Felix bites on his lip as he looks at you adoringly.

"Oh, I don't mind." you smirk. "Let me help you."

"Um..." his face becomes red suddenly. "I - erm, finished already."

"Oh. Oh." you look down at his boxers.

"Embarassing, really."

"It's not. I'm flattered actually." you smirk, caressing his face.

Felix chuckles cutely before leaning down to kiss you.

"What's the plan for today?" you ask against his lips.

"Well, I was thinking we could have a picnic. I mean, it's sunny again." he nods towards the window.

"Okay, I love picnics." you smile as he gets up.

"Actually, I don't remember when was the last time I went on a picnic." you purse your lips, sitting up.

For some reason, memories seem blurry when you start thinking about them, it almost hurts your brain to try and remember well; almost anything.

"We had one like a month ago. Remember? You cut up fruits in the shapes of little stars." Felix says, rummaging through his drawer.

It's as if it suddenly appears in your mind, the clear memory of you preparing for the picnic together with Felix, enjoying a sunny day in the nature.

"Right, I remember now." you chuckle nervously. "Why couldn't I remember that?"

"You just woke up, you need some coffee, my love." Felix comes up to you and kisses your head.

"I'm gonna go take a quick shower." he says and you nod, watching him leave to the bathroom.

You get up and make your way to the kitchen, making some coffee and toast for the two of you, before you start preparing snacks for the picnic.

While you're working on the sandwiches, you can't shake off the uneasy feeling that's creating a knot in your stomach.

When was the last time you went outside without Felix? When was the last time he walked out of the house to go to work? When was the last time you talked to your family?

You can't remember. None of it.

Before you start panicking, Felix appears in the kitchen, startling you.

"Oh, Lix!" you exclaim, your hand on your chest.

"What scared you? It's just me." he smiles sweetly at you.

You stare at him for a moment, could he be hiding something from you?

But Felix is always so caring and loving, he is the best partner you could ever ask for.

He always makes an effort, takes you out on dates, takes care of you when you're tired or sick, is attentive towards your wants and needs; he actually listens to you when you talk.

He loves you.

"Y/n?" Felix chuckles, waving a hand in front of your face.

"Ah, sorry." you laugh awkwardly. "Was just lost in thought."

"What were you thinking about?" Felix grabs one of the toasts you made and bites into it.

"You. How wonderful of a boyfriend you are." you settle on saying, because it is sort of true.

"Aw, darling. Only the best for you." he skips towards you with a big smile, enveloping you in a bone crushing hug as you squeal and grab at him, both of you laughing.

How could you even doubt him?

Felix helps you with the rest of the snacks before the two of you get ready and walk out into another beautiful sunny day.

The walk is short, as there is a park near to your house, your memory now refreshed as you see the tree you always sit under coming into view.

Felix and you race towards the tree, laughing and giddy like little children.

You almost get there first but his arms wrap around your middle and he pulls you back into him, making you almost drop the basket of food you were carrying.

"Lixie! That's cheating!" you put as he turns you around and touches the tree with his foot.

"I won!" Felix smirks.

You pout at him as he puts his backpack down and takes out the picnic blanket.

"Not fair." you whine and he chuckles at you, cupping your face.

"Fine, you won and I'm just a dirty cheater." he smirks and you laugh as he kisses you.

"There, is that better?" he rubs his nose against yours.

"Yes." you nod, making him laugh.

The two of you settle on the blanket, even bringing a speaker so you can play some music while you chat and eat.

After some time, Felix wraps his arm around you and leans on you so you wrap your arms around him as he settles on your chest.

It's quiet for a while and since your focus is not on Felix at the moment, you start looking around.

Cars roll in the distance, one, two, three, four, five, six, then again... It seems as if the same six cars keep passing by.

You stare in disbelief before your eyes fall near the pond where a man is throwing a stick to his dog.

It lands next to a tree and the dog runs to get it, bringing it back to its owner. Then it repeats, the man throws the stick, it lands next to the same tree, the dog gets it, the man throws the stick...

The stick keeps landing on the exact same spot next to that tree, the probability of that is too low for it to be happening repeatedly.

"Lix?" you swallow.

"Yes, sweets?" Felix looks up at you.

"Do you ever- do you ever feel like something is wrong? But you can't quite put your finger on it."

"What do you mean?" he lifts up to look at you, his eyes searching yours.

"Well... Look at that man and his dog." you point and Felix turns to look.

"What about them?"

"Watch where the stick lands." you say and Felix watches as it lands next to the tree.

And so it does again. And again.

"So?" he licks his lips.

"How is he hitting the exact same spot every time?"

"Good hand-eye coordination? Practice?" Felix says, a nervous smile on his face.

You sigh in frustration.

"What about the road? Look at the road!" you point again and Felix looks.

"The same six cars keep going round and round."

"They're not the same, it just seems so."

"Felix, something is wrong. I can feel it! Like how it started raining when I mentioned it. And the lady in the diner yesterday, she kept drinking from her glass but the amount of liquid stayed the same."

"Babe, that's silly. Nothing is wrong. I'm sure it just seemed so, maybe the glass was in the same color as her drink?" Felix places his hand on yours cautiously.

"Lix... I don't know, it's just that I can't remember certain things and it's bothering me."

Felix's eyes dart left and right, his lips pursed.

"Like what?"

"Like the last time I saw my friends or family. The last time you left the house. The last time I was home alone."

"We visited your family two months ago. You saw your friends last weekend. I left the house last week every day when I was working and you were home alone then." Felix frowns as he looks at you. "Baby, are you feeling alright?" he adds, touching your forehead and your eyes water.

"N-no." you whimper, feeling so confused and wondering what the hell is wrong with you.

"How about we go home and you take a nap? I promise you'll feel better after sleeping." Felix coos at you, caressing your face.

"Are you sure it's gonna be okay?" you hiccup.

"I promise, my love." he smiles, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead.

Felix takes you home, and you trust him when he lays you down and whispers how everything is going to be just fine.

You wake up from your nap feeling drowsy and slightly confused.

Felix is next to you, his arms wrapped around you as he breathes deeply.

You sit up, grabbing the glass of water he has left on the nightstand for you when you wake up.

After sipping on the refreshing liquid, you look outside the window and freeze.

"What the fuck?" you mumble to yourself, squinting your eyes as you get up.

"What the fuck?" you repeat, trying to process what your eyes are seeing and Felix stirs behind you.

"Babe?" he grunts a little as he sits up.

"L-Lix..." your voice is shaky as you start panicking.

Felix gets up as you keep staring out the window.

The void stares back at you.

There is nothing outside. No road, no trees, no supermarket, it's not the street you live on, it's one big nothing; just a white light.

"Oh, shit!" Felix exclaims as he sees what you're looking at.

"I told you! I told you something is wrong!" you turn to look at your boyfriend, tears sliding down your cheeks.

But instead of looking scared, Felix looks angry.

"Fucking shit!" his voice raises as his hands reach towards the books on your table, and in frustration he pulls on them, making them clatter down on the floor.

"Felix!" you exclaim as he starts raging, throwing everything on the table down to the floor in a wave of anger.

You've never seen him like this, panicking you step back, not knowing how to react to his outburst or what it all means.

Felix looks up at you suddenly, his eyes softening and filling up with guilt.

"I'm- I'm sorry, y/n."

"Tell me what is happening." you say and he shakes his head.

"Stay here." he says and you step towards him.

"No, tell me what's going on!" you demand and the scowl is back on your boyfriend's face.

"Stay right here and stop asking fucking questions." he says angrily, making you flinch before he leaves the room.

The door slams behind him and as you make your move to follow him, you hear the lock click.

"Felix?" you grip the handle, trying to open up the door. "Felix! You can't just lock me in here without any explanation!" you scream, rattling and kicking the door.

"Felix, please come back!" you yell, your fists pounding against the wood. "I'm scared." you add quietly as fresh tears spill down your cheeks.

Felix disconnects the VR set from his head.

How the fuck did this happen?

How come it didn't render the street as it always does? Why have you started noticing the little things you've never noticed before? Why have you started thinking about your past so much?

He opens up the code with a frustrated sigh, his fingers gliding against the keyboard.

Maybe the AI is getting stronger and more brainy the more he plays with it.

Felix's eyebrows knit together as he goes over the thousands lines of code, trying to figure out if there is some kind of mistake that the computer is not picking up on.

His stomach grumbles and he leans back with a sigh, the virtual food can only do so much.

Felix finally stands up from his table, realizing how long he must've been sitting there judging by the ache in his legs and back.

"I'll deal with you later." he waves his finger towards the computer before picking up his phone and ordering pizza.

He grabs a can of soda from his fridge and looks around.

It's eerily quiet in his apartment, save for the silent buzzing of his computer and the distant hum of traffic outside.

Felix makes his way to the big glass windows, staring down at the city before him.

He's gonna have to go back to work on Monday, knowing he can't spend as much time with you the way he wants to when his vacation days end, brings a sadness to his soul.

The 'you' who basically doesn't exist, you who is just lines and lines of code, a program, there only when he disconnects from reality.

If he could, Felix would disconnect from it forever just so he could be inside the damn device next to you, always.

And now since he made you upset, it's going to be hard to get everything back how it was before, under his control.

He gets angry at himself for not being more careful and adding in more details, all for the sake of just being with you the whole time, seeing you happy and satisified.

Yes, that's all Felix wants.

He wants to be the only one you smile at, the only one that gets to enjoy something so holy and beautiful like your love and your touch.

The doorbell snaps him out of his thoughts and after paying the delivery guy, Felix sits alone and eats his dinner while thinking of ways to correct his mistakes.

You were not gonna slip from his fingers.

This won't be ruined for him.

You open your eyes and turn to see Felix already awake, on his side, his head propped on his hand as he stares at you lovingly.

"Good morning, my angel." he smiles at you.

"M-morning. I- ugh... I feel weird. I think I had a nightmare." your throat is dry as you swallow and Felix grabs the glass of water, bringing it to your lips.

"What kind of nightmare?"

"Well, there was nothing outside- outside the windows. And you got mad and started throwing stuff around. You really scared me."

"Oh my love, that would never happen." Felix quickly wraps his arms around you. "Everything outside is fine too, look." he turns you both towards the window and sure enough, everything looks normal.

"I'm so glad it was just a dream. I never want us to fight or anything." you whimper and Felix shushes you.

"Everything is perfect, my love. And I will make sure it stays that way." Felix mutters into your hair before pressing a few sweet kisses there.

"It's my last free day before going to work. Let's enjoy it together, without you worrying your pretty head about anything, hm?" he adds and you nod with a chuckle.

Felix and you decide to go bowling and then out for lunch, topping the outing off with a nice walk near the beach and everything seems perfect again; nothing like the bad dream you had or the unsettling feeling in your stomach.

No, that feeling was replaced with butterflies as Felix smiled lovingly at you, telling you how much he loves you.

When you got home, you spent hours in each other's embrace, connected as one.

Everything was beautiful, the way it was supposed to be.

It's Monday and Felix makes his way to work.

The bell on the door chimes as he opens it, eyes looking up at him from the counter.

He smiles wide as he enters.

"Hi, Lix!" you smile innocently at him.

"Hey, y/n." he smiles back, the voices in his head telling him he's sick but he ignores them.

"How was your vacation? Did something fun?" you ask, always so sweet, so polite, so pretty.

"Oh yeah. It was amazing." he nods at you.

You smile, not wanting to pry too much, unaware of what Felix has been doing for almost two years since he started working with you.

As soon as he saw you for the first time, Felix swears he felt Cupid shoot his arrow right into his heart. You were so beautiful, so pure like an angel.

Always smiling, always nice with everyone. The sound of your laughter melodious inside the cafe, echoing off the walls.

You always gave extra sweets to kids.

You always stayed behind to clean up.

You always offered to help out.

He wanted to have you all to himself.

He wanted to capture your beauty and innocence and hold it in the palm of his hand, have it exist only for him.

Yes, Felix could've confessed or asked you out.

But then you would see how boring he is, how he has nothing to offer to you.

You'd leave him, you'd smile at someone else, your attention wouldn't be only directed towards him.

Felix started staying behind with you, under the guise of helping you out just to get more information about where you live, what you enjoy, what you dislike, what your hobbies are.

It wasn't enough.

He became obsessed.

Felix learned your schedule and started breaking into your house.

At first, he stole some panties and went through all your stuff, reading your diaries, going through your photographs, taking your privacy away from you without you having a clue about it.

But then it became worse as he would wait for you to come home, his body cramped under your bed.

He would watch you get undressed, listen to you touch yourself on your bed, his cock straining against his pants and he couldn't do anything about it except squeeze it occasionally.

Embarassingly, he came into his pants while only listening to you more times than he'd like to admit.

It wasn't enough.

Felix was hungry for more.

That's how he came to the idea to steal your dna and feed it to the new AI system he was working on in his spare time.

He had to collect enough of it to have the ai take on your personality, the one he loved and admired so much.

Felix spent hours and hours coding and working on the program, until finally he could use it.

It was everything he wanted and more.

You were happy there.

You were his there.

Here, in the real world, you were just coworkers and that fact started bothering Felix more and more.

Unaware of his intentions, you smiled at Felix and he smiled back at you.

It was time to take another step so he could have you for real this time.

Tonight, you were gonna become his and there was no way to escape.

Felix was gonna show you how happy he can make you, only him.

You're going to be right where you belong.

taglist: @moonchild9350 @janepg @velvetmoonlght @hwanghyunjinismybae @jehhskz @laylasbunbunny @porangporangmeong @jeonginslefthand @laughatdanger @sapphirewaves @simpforleeknaur @s3ungm1nxxl0ve @painterhyunjin @starlost-mochi-x @saintcosette @ooshyana @frehyun

[ashwhowrites]

Criminal love

I had this idea and have been working on it since August... and it's finally here! I hope you can take the time to give it a read. And if you do, I hope you like it 🤞🏻I'm really proud of this one and if you could give it some love, it would mean the world❤️

Criminal Eddie Munson x Hopper Daughter reader- Y/N visits her dad all the time at work, usually to deliver donuts but a certain prisoner catches her eye...and she seems to catch his

⚠️smutttttty

Y/N never got in trouble, with her dad being the sheriff of Hawkins, she had eyes on her constantly. Jim was a good dad but very overprotective. He had strict rules and sheltered both his daughters from the world, especially boys.

Y/N never got to have a boyfriend, boys were not allowed into the house until El and Mike got together. Y/N was jealous that El got to have a relationship before she did, it was unfair.

Y/N carried a box of donuts as she walked into the police station, smiling at all of her dad's coworkers as she made her way to his office. She knocked on the door and let herself in, shocked to see a boy cuffed to the table.

"Sorry!" She said, closing the door behind her

"It's alright. Come on it, I'm starving," Jim groaned

She opened the door and walked in, she kept her focus on her dad as she placed the box on his desk. She felt the boy's eyes burning into her and she fought with everything in her to not look.

"Sherif Hopper, Byers is here to see you," the front desk lady said before she walked back out. Jim sighed and took a big bite out of his donut.

"I'll be right back, don't do anything stupid," he spoke with a mouthful and Y/N cringed when pieces of food fell down his uniform. She went to follow behind her dad as he walked out the door but a deep voice came from behind her.

"You mind handing me one of those?"

She turned around, and her eyes met the stranger. He looked young, around her age, with dark eyes and dark long hair. He was extremely attractive.

"Uh sure," she said, a little uneasy as she reached for a chocolate frosted donut. She grabbed a napkin and placed it in front of him. His right hand was cuffed to the table, and his left was free to pick up the donut. She silently watched as he bit the donut, groaning in bliss at the taste.

"Delicious, thank you, gorgeous." He said with a wink, smirking as he took another bite.

She felt her face burn and looked away. His dark eyes felt like he was lighting her on fire. She coughed and turned around, reaching for the door.

"What's your name, baby?" He asked. She ignored the way her body jolted from the nickname and the way it made her throb in between her legs.

"Um, Y/N. Yours?" She asked, turning back around.

Looking at him again, she could have sworn he was the most beautiful yet sexiest guy she had ever seen. But he obviously was trouble and she shouldn't get involved.

"Eddie"

"Alright, see ya later, kid," Jim said as he came back into the room, softly pushing her out.

Y/N rested her head against the door as she caught her breath.

~~~

Y/N secretly hoped that wouldn't be the last time she saw Eddie, and it wasn't.

Every once and awhile he'd be in that chair, cuffed to the side with a big smile on his face when he looked at her. She blushed at the way he'd wink when her dad wasn't looking as she walked out.

The more she saw him, the more she got excited to bring her dad those damn donuts. She might have been a little guilty of fixing her hair and adding light touches of makeup. And extra guilty for wearing clothes to catch his attention.

He took the bait, no shame when he'd check her out. She could feel his eyes burning into her as she talked to her dad. She loved the way he licked his lips and gave her a nod before she left. It was a silent conversation with just their eyes, and she hoped her dad couldn't sense the sexual tension they created.

After a few too many strikes, Eddie got thrown behind the bars. Y/N dropped off the donuts, a little bummed Eddie wasn't in the chair. But she didn't want to sound suspicious so she didn't say anything. Just walked back out. But then she swore she could hear his voice down the hall. She looked over her shoulder before she snuck down the hallway. She ignored the prisoners behind the bars, searching for the familiar boy. He wasn't talking anymore so she wasn't sure how close she was to finding him.

Until he found her

"Pretty girl coming to see me?"

She smiled without realizing, turning her head to the right and there he was. She purred at how attractive he looked in an orange jumpsuit, his tattoos on display and his arms hanging out of the bars.

"Guilty. Hopper had enough of you in his office?" She teased, walking up to his cell.

"Seems that way. I was bummed I wouldn't be seeing ya anymore. Glad you got curious," he flirted with a smirk.

"That would be a shame. Especially after I just bought this skirt," she flirted, twirling slowly as her short skirt flowed under her thighs.

Eddie couldn't help but growl as he watched her skin become more exposed. He barely knew anything about her but he'd do anything for her.

"It's a shame there's bars in the middle of us, because I'd love to see how it looked bunched up in my hands," he said, flexing out his hands. She shivered when his skin softly brushed hers.

She never felt this way before. She never felt so sexually frustrated, and wanted a boy she barely knew. She was usually good. But God she wanted to do so many bad things with him and to him.

She looked over her shoulder to make sure the hallway was clear.

"One second!" She said

Eddie watched as she walked fast down the hallway, she was gone for a few seconds but came back.

She had a folded piece of paper in her hand. She walked in front of him and placed it in his hand.

"When you get out, come find me. First window on the right." She said with a wink.

~~~

Eddie did just as he was told. The second he was out, he was racing to the address on the piece of paper. He looked for her window, stepping up on his tiptoes to peek inside. There she was, sitting on her bed as she flipped through a magazine.

Eddie gave a slight knock on the window. She jumped at the sound and her head snapped to look at the window. A smile on her face when she realized who it was.

She got off the bed and closed her door, locking it before she walked over to the window. She slid it open and allowed him to jump up and climb in.

"Cute PJs," he said, smirking as he sent her a wink. She blushed as she looked down, realizing she was in baby pink shorts and a matching tank top.

"Thanks," she said shyly. She sucked in her breath when he stepped closer, his right hand came down to land on her hip. His thumb rubbed the skin that showed under her tank top. She shivered at the feeling of his touch on her skin.

"Is there a reason you wanted me here?" he whispered, he turned his head as he slowly leaned in. She watched as his eyes looked down at her lips, and she couldn't help but look at his in return.

"Don't be all shy now, pretty little thing," he taunted, a playful smirk on his face. "You wanted a little taste of danger, huh?"

"Yes" she admitted, she moved her head closer to his, looking down at his lips again. He took that as a green light and closed the gap between them. She moaned as his warm lips planted on hers, she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him back.

She wasn't sure what she was doing. Letting a random boy, who has trouble with the law, in her bedroom and making out with him.

His rough hands felt soft against her skin, raising goosebumps all over her body. With their tongues tied together, they moved to her bed. His back was against the mattress as she sat on his lap. She couldn't help but feel proud as she felt his cock against her thigh.

She moaned into his mouth as his hands ran up her thighs, moving to cup her ass. He squeezed the skin in his hands, loving the martial of her small shorts against his skin. Her sounds were angelic and her voice was sweet.

Her kiss was innocent and slow, making Eddie crave more and more.

Eddie moaned when her hands slid under his shirt slowly moving further down...down a little more...and-

"Why is this door locked?"

Y/N and Eddie jumped apart as the doorknob rattled. Y/N quickly slid off Eddie and began to panic.

"One second!" She squeaked

"Uh oh, is that Sherrif Hopper?" Eddie teased a sexy smirk that Y/N wanted to feel against the inside of her thighs.

"Out the window, now!" Y/N whispered, pushing his body off her bed

"Y/N, I am giving you three seconds to open this goddamn door!"

"Daddy is getting mad," Eddie continued to tease, slowly getting off the bed

"Eddie, please just go!" She whispered as she walked towards her door.

The door flew open and Y/N froze in fear. She didn't want to turn around. Hopper's eyes scanned the room then landed on her.

"Talking to yourself in here?" He asked, looking behind the door.

Y/N turned around and breathed a sigh of relief when she didn't see Eddie.

"Yeah! Just running through a presentation for class."

"Well, you know not to lock doors at bedtime"

"I'm sorry, it won't happen again," Y/N said, Hopper nodded then walked back out. She softly closed the door and sighed in relief.

She went to her window and locked it when she noticed a small piece of paper on the ledge. A smile on her face as it was Eddie's phone number written in his messy handwriting.

~~~

The next night her dad was working the late shift and El was already in her room sleeping. Y/N waited all day to call Eddie but knew it had to be when her dad wasn't home.

Once she heard his car pull off, she raced into her bedroom, locking the door, and grabbing the phone next to her bed.

She typed in the number that was written on the paper and held her breath as it began to ring. She eyed her alarm clock, it was pretty late. What if he wasn't even awake? Oh God, what if she wakes him up! Before she could panic and hang up, the line was answered.

"Eddie Munson, who's this?"

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She wasn't even in person with him and he had her so nervous.

"It's uh Y/N, I thought I should give the number you left a call," she said

Eddie smiled as he could hear the nervousness in her voice.

"I'm glad you called, I was scared you didn't get it," he chuckled

"Yeah, I wanted to call sooner but had to wait for Dad to leave for work," Y/N nervously laughed

"Oh, sneaking phone calls for me now? I'm starting to feel special," he teased. He could picture her face burning and biting her lip

She adjusted herself on her bed as she chewed on her bottom lip

"If you get to feel special, I think I deserve to feel special too, don't you think?"

"Oh baby, I could spend hours making you feel very damn special," the way he said special made her believe he was alluding to something else. She bit back a whine as she tried not to seem flustered. "You wearing those cute pj's again?"

"Uh no," she said quietly, looking down at herself

"Then what are you wearing?"

Her breath got caught in the back of her throat. She let out a small cough as she felt like she was choking. She shivered as his dark laugh filled her ear, he was laughing at her and it turned her on.

"You go first," she said, trying to buy herself time as her brain felt like it was melting.

"A towel and nothing else,"

Y/N couldn't bite back her whine this time, the sound escaping her. She was guilty of picturing it in her head and clenched her thighs. "I'm in my underwear and a T-shirt," Y/N finally got the confidence to say. Eddie let out a deep moan and Y/N felt her stomach twist.

"I can picture how amazing you look right now. Those legs are on display, nice and smooth. And from your whines I'm assuming you are a little turned on. Are your legs pressed together?"

She froze, it was like he was in the room with her. Her body was heating up and she was quick to unclench her legs.

"I bet your pussy is aching right now isn't it?"

He could hear her breathing getting heavier and he smirked. "It's okay, I'm aching right now for you too. I wish I was there to ease the ache. Rub that clit and make you shake."

Her brain shut off when she heard a low moan leave his mouth. Then the moans continued and she could hear his breathing pick up.

"I wish you were here too," she moaned. What's the point in acting like she didn't want him to ruin her. She didn't care if he could guess her every move, all she could focus on was how badly her body needed him.

"Yeah? If I was there, what would you want me to do?" He asked, he reached into his nightstand and grabbed his lotion. He yanked off his towel and laid on his bed.

"To kiss me"

He chuckled at her innocent answer, "I'd love to kiss you. Such a shame your dad interrupted us last time. I can't get the feeling of your hands on my chest and stomach out of my head."

"Do you wish I was touching you right now?" She asked

"I wish you were milking my cock right now," he answered. She let out a small moan as she slipped her hand into her underwear. She slowly circled her clit, praying it would relieve some ache.

"I wish I was balls deep inside your pretty pussy. Bruising your skin as I fuck you against the mattress. I wanna hear every sound you make, the sounds leaving your mouth and the sounds of your wet pussy sucking me in,"

She felt her eyes roll in the back of her head as her fingers sped up. Her breathing picked up as she bucked her hips.

"Are you touching yourself?" His accusing tone made her freeze. Almost like she got caught doing something she wasn't supposed to.

"Yes," she whispered, her fingers frozen on her clit. She could feel it throbbing against her fingers as she held her breath for his next words.

"Good girl. Gonna make yourself cum listening to my voice?" He added lotion to his hand and began to pump himself. "Because I'm more than happy to make you cum."

"Fuck, Eddie" she whined, with his permission she began to circle her clit again.

"That's it, baby. Fuck yourself for me. Imagine my cock sliding in and out of you, stretching you open with my fat cock. Think you could take all of me?" He moaned, moving his hand up and down his long and thick cock

"Yes, give me all of it, please," she whined, she pushed the phone against her ear with her shoulder and sunk her fingers inside of her, keeping her other fingers busy on her clit.

"Such a good girl using those manners. I bet a pretty innocent thing like you likes it rough. I'm so fucking hard for you, gorgeous. Thinking about watching your sweet pussy taking me inch by inch."

She moaned as her fingers sped up, biting her lip as her wetness echoed throughout her room. "I wish I could feel how hard you were. In my hand, in my mouth and inside of me. Wanna feel you cum inside of me and mark me."

Eddie shivered at her dirty words, his eyes clenched shut as he pumped himself faster. "Keep talking like that I'm going to explode," he chuckled, "I remember seeing you for the first time, I wanted to bend you right over that desk and make you scream."

"Yeah?" she moaned out.

"My cock was throbbing for you, just like it is right now," his voice got deeper and more breathless. She closed her eyes as she pictured him fisting his cock, she wondered what his naked body looked like. How many tattoos covered his skin? Did he have any moles or freckles? How long and thick was he? Would he fit like ease inside her or would she be forced to her limits?

Y/N moaned louder as she felt her stomach tightening. "I'm so close."

"Cum for me, pretty girl. Soak your fingers and those pretty panties for me."

Eddie fucked his hand as he heard her fall apart. The sounds of her choked moans were quick to make his orgasm approach. He bit his lip and bucked his hips as he imagined filling her up with his cum as she orgasmed over the line.

She yanked her fingers out of her to slam her hand over her mouth to silence her cries as she came.

"That's it. Work yourself through it nicely and gentle. Did so good for me. Such a good girl," he praised as his cum spilled over his hand and stomach.

They both took a second to catch their breath, the phone silent. Y/N felt her face burn once she realized what she had just done. She felt nervous, as she wasn't sure what to expect next.

"What are you doing tomorrow night?" He asked, grabbing his towel to clean himself off.

"Saturday night so nothing," Y/N giggled, "what's up?"

"Perfect, I'll be at your place at ten. Leave that window unlocked for me, gorgeous."

And then the line went dead.

~

Y/N wasn't sure what to expect but she wanted to be prepared for everything. She was in the shower for over an hour, making sure every inch of her was smooth.

"Alright, I'm going to work, and El is at Max's. Please don't make a mess," her dad yelled through the door. She yelled back and waited until the door slammed shut.

She walked out of the bathroom, a robe covering her naked body. She locked the front door and turned off all the lights. She headed into her room and opened her window a crack. The clock read 9:30, and excitement filled her stomach.

She cleaned up the small mess in her room. Then she sprayed perfume all over her skin, fluffed her hair, and dug in her drawers for her best underwear. She couldn't help but clench her thighs knowing her underwear might not be on for long.

She quickly changed and put the robe back over herself. She dug around in her nightstand for a condom, making sure it was on top so she didn't have to look for it later.

By the time she finished everything, she heard a soft knock. She walked over to the window, a nervous smile on her face as she opened the window fully.

Eddie slipped through her window with ease. Closing it behind him. She chewed at her bottom lip as he closed her curtains, the action made butterflies appear in her stomach. She held her breath as he turned to her with a devilish smirk.

"Hi, Eddie," she said, already breathless. He walked up to her, his right hand cupped her cheek and his left hand landed on her hip. He didn't say anything, just slipped his warm tongue inside her awaiting mouth.

The kiss was hot and heavy. She played with his tongue as she sank her hands into his curls. He moaned as she tugged his hair, his chest rumbling against hers. Their lips stayed locked as he walked her backward to her bed. She gasped as she fell on her mattress, their lips disconnecting.

She took the time to catch her breath, looking up at him as he looked down at her. She shivered under his stare, how dark his eyes were. He reached down and undid her robe, she let the robe fall down her arms. Eddie groaned as he looked at her, his hand palmed himself over his sweats as he licked his lips. Somehow his brown eyes turned even darker as he took in her half-naked body. He looked at her like he wanted to devour her, and god she wanted him to.

She sat up to get rid of the robe, throwing it at his chest. He laughed as it hit him, but then the laugh turned into a growl when she slipped off her underwear and tossed it. He easily caught it in his hands, letting the robe hit the floor. His eyes took in the image of her bare pussy in front of him, immediately dropping to his knees. It was silent as his eyes locked on her cunt, watching as her wetness oozed out of her. He tucked her underwear in his pocket, licking his lips as he never tore his eyes away.

"Please do something," she whined. He looked up at her, her eyes desperate and pleading. That was all he needed to snap into action. She yelped as he harshly grabbed her ankles and yanked her to the edge of the bed.

He placed her legs over his shoulders, then hooked his arms under her thighs. She shivered as his hot breath fanned her cunt. He softly blew air on her clit, watching her pussy pulse in response. He rubbed two fingers up and down her cunt, his skin collecting her wetness. He looked up at her as he pushed the two fingers inside of her. She moaned out instantly, shivering under his stare. She felt so turned on as he kept his focus on her face like he needed to see her reaction to everything.

He pushed his fingers in and out of her, curling them with every thrust. Eddie felt his cock twitch in his pants as she moaned out. The smell of her arousal was taking over him, and the feeling of her wetness coating his fingers as they moved inside of her. He was captivated by her like there was a spell cast over him to make him crave her. She cried out as he slid in a third finger, knuckle deep as his cold rings pressed against her. Eddie got an idea, his free hand softly rubbing her thigh. The soft touch distracted her for a split second, then she felt her cunt clenching around something cold.

He was fingering her so deeply that his rings were inside her. She clawed at the sheets as she rocked her hips against him. He leaned in, placing a soft kiss on her clit. As he continued to fuck her with his fingers, he latched his lips on her clit and sucked on it lightly.

She locked her ankles around his head as his teeth scraped against her sensitive bud. Her body shook uncontrollably, her hands moving into his hair. He let out a soft moan when she accidentally tugged his curls, the vibration nearly sending her over the edge.

"Jesus fu-fuck, Eddie," she cried out.

He bucked his hips hearing his name spill out as a moan, he removed his hand from her thigh needing to give himself some relief. He moved his hand inside his pants, softly rubbing himself. He flicked his tongue over her clit, sending her over the edge. Her nails dug into his skull as she clenched her thighs around his head. He moved his hand off of himself and moved it to hold her hip. She lost all control, soaking his fingers as she came, her hips rocking against him. He had nowhere to go, her ankles locked around his head and his fingers sucked in by her cunt. He fucked her through the orgasm, moving his fingers as fast as he could. He couldn't help but buck his hips against the air, his cock leaking with need.

He slid his fingers out of her, sucking them clean. He moaned at the taste of her. He knew he'd crave to taste her every day of his life. He couldn't help himself as he pushed his tongue inside of her, lapping up her juices causing her to yelp at the overstimulation.

He rose to his feet as he watched her body handle the aftermath of the orgasm.

"Eddie?" She whined

"Yes?"

"Get naked already," she smiled, her face fucked out and her hair sweaty. Eddie felt his insides burn at the lust in her eyes.

"Yes, ma'am," she took the time to catch her breath as she watched him begin to strip. His hands gripped the end of his shirt, pulling it effortlessly over his head. She couldn't keep back the purr that left her throat, finally seeing his naked skin.

"You do have more tattoos," she breathlessly laughed. He smiled at the comment, a foreign feeling of a blush coating his cheeks, his heartwarming.

"You thought about it?" He asked, his hands pulling down his pants. His tight boxers left nothing to the imagination. She could see the outline of his long and thick cock being suffocated by the thin material.

She used all the energy she had to sit up, moving to her knees. She gave him a small hum as an answer, her fingers dipped into the waistband of his boxers. She loved the way his stomach clenched as her fingers teased him.

"You drive me crazy, sheriff's daughter," he panted, his large hand moving into her hair. Yanking her head up, she gasped at the pain but could feel herself getting wet between her thighs.

She kept her eyes on him as she pulled down his boxers. He stepped out of them, kicking it to the side. She felt her heart race as her eyes ranked down his body, finally seeing his cock. She whimpered as she took it in, he was thick, full of veins, and throbbing. His tip was leaking, pre cum dripping down to his balls. She moved closer, opening her mouth as she licked the trail of precum up to his pink tip.

His stomach moved rapidly as he breathed. His eyes locked on her as she looked up at him through her lashes. He used his free hand to guide his cock into her mouth, showing no patience as he pushed himself fully inside. She gagged as he hit the back of her throat, her eyes immediately watering. She puffed air out of her nose, trying to keep her throat open as he guided himself in and out.

"That's it, suck my cock. Just like that," he moaned, now with both hands on her head. She bobbed herself up and down, her spit going everywhere down her chin. She wrapped her hand around the amount she couldn't fit, jerking him off as she focused on sucking his tip.

He roughly shoved her off, biting down on his lip as he tried to fight back his orgasm. "Shit, sorry baby. Just need to come inside you," he apologized.

She giggled and moved back to lay down on her bed. "The condom is in the drawer, big boy," she smirked. He gulped as she spread open her legs, her dripping cunt on display as she waited. He moved in a flash, crawling on the bed and grabbing the condom. He tore it open with his teeth, slipping the rubber on.

He teased his tip against her clit and in between her lips. "Are you ready? We can stop if you need to."

"Fuck me, Eddie," she demanded. He leaned down and smashed his lips on hers, swallowing her moans as he guided himself inside of her. He pushed himself in slowly, giving her time to adjust. She released his lips as she threw back her head, a loud moan leaving her mouth.

He peppered kisses to her cheeks and neck, trying his best to hold himself back.

She reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck, she gave him a nod before she pressed her lips against his. His tongue played with hers as he snapped his hips against hers, his cock easily sliding in and out with how wet her cunt was.

He shivered at how perfect she felt around him. How tight she was, and the way she locked his body against hers.

Their moans mixed together when they pulled away for air. They shared the same breath of air, passing it back and forth as their lustful eyes stared into each other.

His hips began to move faster, her nails digging into his shoulders as she tried to match his pace.

"Fuck you feel even better than I thought," he grunted against her ear. His lips left sloppy kisses on her neck as his orgasm began to build again. He knew he'd never get the same amount of pleasure from his hand compared to her.

He moved his right hand down the middle of their bodies, easily finding her puffy clit. She moaned into his skin as she clenched around his cock.

"Do that again," he begged, snapping his hips harder against her. She obeyed, clenching herself around him. His touch on her clit moved faster as his thrusts got sloppy and out of rhythm.

"Cum for me, Eddie. Fill me up," she encouraged. Her words muffled against his shoulder. He moaned into her neck, but he refused to finish until she did.

He used everything he had in him to hold back his orgasm as he drilled her into the mattress.

"EDDIE!" she screamed, her skin covered in sweat as she gripped his sweaty skin. Her second orgasm washed over her, soaking them both.

He clenched his eyes shut and his head fell against her neck as he puffed through his mouth. He rubbed her through her orgasm, waiting until she finished before he removed his fingers away from her clit.

Her body melted against the mattress as he used her body to reach his high. He gripped both her hips with his hands, locking her in place as he gave his last few thrusts. His teeth sank down against her neck as he emptied himself inside the condom. He wished he was painting her walls with his cum, but that would come later.

He stilled inside her as he caught his breath. Their sweaty bodies stuck together as he fell against her. He slowly pulled himself out, discarding the condom, tying the top, and tossing it to the floor. He rolled over, wrapping his arm under her head. She cuddled into his side, her fingers lazily running back and forth on his chest. She felt herself drifting away to sleep and the feeling of a kiss being planted on her forehead.

~

She jolted awake when she heard the front door close. Her room was dark and she was alone in bed. She looked at the clock, nearly five am, her dad must have finished work. She was quick to pretend to be sleeping when her door cracked open. She waited until she heard his bedroom door close, then flipped on her lamp.

Eddie was nowhere to be seen, and his clothes were gone. She knew he couldn't stay the night because of her dad but she was sad that he was gone. She slipped out of bed to cover her naked skin. As she got dressed she noticed something taped on her window. She walked over and ripped it off.

"Don't think this was a one-time thing- call me whenever you want me, baby ;)

-E.M."

She couldn't help but blush at the note. Her heart swelled at knowing she was going to see him again.

~~~

It's been a week since the unforgettable night in her room. She called Eddie whenever her dad wasn't home, and they talked for hours until she had to go. She tried to ignore how badly she craved to feel him between her legs again. To feel his lips on hers and let his hands roam over her body.

One night her call went unanswered. She tried not to be too disappointed but she was. She waited an hour and called again, but never got an answer. Then the next night she received no call back. At first, she was pissed. She thought he was ignoring her and she didn't react kindly to that. But then she got to thinking about where she met Eddie in the first place, jail.

~

The next morning she dressed to impress, but conservative enough where her father wouldn't scold her in front of everyone. She wasn't sure how long Eddie would be locked up this time so she stuffed her pockets with little gifts.

With a delighted smile on her face, she placed the box of donuts on her dad's desk.

"Thank ya, honey," he said as he shoved half the donut in his mouth. She rolled her eyes at his lack of manners but kissed his cheek as she left his office. Instead of heading towards the exit, she walked down the hallway. She was glad at times her dad was the sheriff because no one batted their eyes when she was in the station.

"Eddie?" She whispered, "You in here?" She crept down the hall, ignoring the looks of the other prisoners behind the bars.

"Baby?"

She smiled as she heard his voice, picking up her pace as she followed the sound. There he was, arms hanging out of the bars.

"Fuck, baby. I've missed you," he whispered, she walked up to his cell and softly touched his hands.

"I missed you too. I haven't heard from you in a few days and thought I might find you here," she laughed. He was back in the orange jumpsuit. And now that she knows what he looks like underneath it, she wishes she could tear it off.

She leaned in and kissed his lips, getting as close as the bars allowed.

He smiled as they pulled away. "I'm glad you came to see me."

"Do you know how long you are here?" She asked

"I don't know, sweets. Your dad takes his sweet time when it comes to me," Eddie said as he rolled his eyes.

"What did you do this time?" She asked. His thumb softly rubbed her hand, his touch sent shivers down her spine.

"Don't worry about it, gorgeous"

She knew she should have cared more about why he was constantly behind bars, but she didn't care. And she doesn't think she ever will.

"You know the more you get on his bad side, he's never going to let us be together," she warned.

He softly chuckled, a dark look taking over his eyes. "You think I'm going to let anyone stop me?"

The simple sentence made her thighs clench. The look of possessiveness in his eyes, like she was his and he'd be damned if someone tried to change that.

"Love when you dress all pretty for me," he smiled. He softly whistled as he stepped back, keeping his hands laced with hers, checking her out.

"I also brought you a little something," she whispered. He lifted his eyebrows in question. "In case you are in here a bit too long," Eddie watched as she let go of his hands and dug in her pocket, a lacy material in her hands.

She felt her cheeks burning as she handed him the pair of lace. He smirked as he felt the material in his hands. She held her breath as he lifted the lace to his face, inhaling her scent. Her breath was stuck in her throat when he let out a small growl. She kept her eyes locked on him as she dug in her other pocket, taking out the small Polaroid she had taken before she arrived. She felt a little shy as she handed it over.

"Fuck, what a pretty sight," he praised as he looked at the photo. Her naked body was on display for him, he wished her skin was still covered in his marks.

"Be on your best behavior so you can come see me, yeah?" She whispered. His eyes snapped up to look at her.

"Oh, I'm going to kiss these cop's asses so I can feel you wrapped around me again, pretty thing," his filthy words sent a tingle straight down to her cunt. She nodded and pressed her lips against his, one last kiss before she left.

~

And he kept his word. A few days later he was back at her window, the same criminal smile on his face.

@bmunson86 @mxcheese @ladymunson @michaelfuckinglangdon @z0mbie-blah @biittersweet @mirrorsstuff @somethingvicked @micheledawn1975 @ago-godance @magnificantmermaid @tlclick73 @hargrovesswifee @cityofidek @silky-luxe @lokiofasgard616 @loving-and-dreaming @eddiemunsonsbitch69 @ashlynnkennedy @strangerthingsstories5255 @harringt8ns @pleasinghellfire @whoscamila @stusdollface93 @gretavankleep37 @bellaisswagger @arlxt @ineedmentalhelp123

[ultralightpoe]

JUNO - Bucky Barnes

Authors Note: Gah, here we go again with the bucky fics since he looked so damn good in that trailer! Enjoy!

Word Count: 4215

Warnings: SMUT SMUT SMUT.....and more smut.

Requests: OPEN

Main Masterlist ~ ~ Halloween 2024 Event

[Thank you for the gif @ayo-edebiri ]

Enjoy!

“Don't have to tell your hot ass a thing

Oh yeah, you just get it

Whole package, babe, I like the way you fit

God bless your dad's genetics, mm, uh”

-

You were a terrible terrible person, this was a fact. It would be put on whatever wikipedia page they made for villains as soon as people figured it out, which considering the rage building in your body would be any moment now. Why were you a terrible person? That’s easy to explain. 

There was a time where everyone avoided your boyfriend like the plague, when the Winter Soldier cliche had been stuck to his image like a nail in a tire and everyone treated him like crap. And who stayed by his side? You. Not that it was ever about keeping score because you just wanted what was best for him. But now that people are all about kissing his ass since he had some new found fame? You wished things would go back to the way they were. And that made you a terrible person. 

Who would want things to go back when your love was treated terribly?

But then you see girls like Montana clinging to his side and that little green monster in the pit of your stomach begins growing and growing until it leads to moments like now, with you standing at the bar clutching your glass like it was the only thing tethering you to this earth. 

Yet another gala was being thrown, this time it was ‘Rockstars for Schooling Funds’ and Bucky was required to attend for PR. And attend your man did. The jacket, the tie, the pushed back hair and the hot ass glare. 

From the second you saw him ready for tonight you were ready to pull him into the bedroom and never leave, your skin grew hot just remembering the feeling of his hands roaming your body as you tried to lead him into the bedroom. He obviously didn’t fall for it and now you were here watching Montana hold onto his arm as she laughed at something he said. 

As if sensing your glare he turns to catch your eye, and you know that he was surveying your safety by the sharp look in his eyes and all you can think was ‘God bless your dads genetics’.  But you refuse to break for him, so you shrug and turn back to the bar ready to order yourself another drink. 

Best thing about wearing a dress like the one you were wearing tonight? Attention.  Within seconds the men at the bar were clamoring to buy you a drink, crooked smiles and lame pick up lines. The prized contender? The southern man with kind eyes wearing his very own black cowboy hat. 

This could be fun. 

“What’ll it be?” He drawls and you have to fight off the blush filling your cheeks just at the sound of it. 

“Hmm, I haven't decided yet.” You flirt, batting your lashes for a second. “Think you can help a girl out?”

“There’s the ‘Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy’.” He reads off the little menu, looking up to you from under his hat, giving a smooth wink and you huff out a small laugh. 

“Would it be worth my time?”

“It’s the best on the menu from what I can see.” As if on cue you both look out to the crowd around you at the gala, with loud music and cheesy rockstar costumes, and whilst he is trying to make a point your eyes roam for a familiar head of hair. But the group that Bucky had been sitting with for the past 30 minutes was now short a member, your man. “Who would want to waste time with any of these cruds when you could have a real drink sugar?”

But the words were lost on you as your eyes traced over the room in a hurried panic. Where did he go?

But then your nose fills with a familiar woodsy scent as a familiar arm wraps around your waist in a tight grip that has the cowboy standing straight up in his own panic. 

“Yeah Doll, how bout a real drink?”

-

“You make me wanna make you fall in love

Oh, late at night, I'm thinking 'bout you, ah-ah

Wanna try out my fuzzy pink handcuffs?

Oh, I hear you knockin', baby, come on up”

-

That little green monster building in your stomach? Now she had a fire pal burning straight through your skin at the image of the icy glare Bucky managed to send in the cowboys direction, the fingers on your waist tightening and digging into your skin. 

“I was just talking to my friend here about drinks.” You hum out, watching his jaw tighten as he continues to glare. “What do you know about drinks?”

The cowboy, who you now knew to be a foolish man since he still stood in that spot, lets out a smooth chuckle. “Considering he’s holding an old fashioned I would say not much, Sugar.”

“Really? I always thought that the old fashioned ways worked in seduction. At least they did for me.” Bucky all but growls out, pulling you closer to him. “Now how bout we ask the gal. Do my old fashioned ways work?” 

As if to prove his point he presses his thigh between your legs just a notch and squeezed at your waist, you were lost. 

“No words? Hmm? Interesting.” He smiles, “Think you need a break from the crowd?”

He doesn’t waste time waiting for an answer, rather he keeps his grip on your waist as he leads you through the large gala, keeping the glare on his features that has people backing away to avoid his anger. You however basked in it, and as he lead you into the bathroom with the slam of the door and an easy movement to lock the door. 

You got right to work, hopping onto the counter and wiggling a bit as he turns back to you. 

You look up at him through you lashes, kicking one foot out a bit to expose your leg to him. “I mean not that I don’t love this vibe, we didn’t pack the handcuffs baby.” 

“Oh so the pretty girl thinks she’s funny.” He chuckles, stepping forward and moving his hands to the top of your thighs to squeeze before pulling you forward harshly. “In case you haven’t realized it, this is the moment where you start giving me reasons to give you what you so badly want.” 

Words failed you as his palms roamed your skin, rubbing soft circles to begin pushing up your dress. 

“Oh, I’m the one in trouble here?” You huff, leaning back as he pushed his way in between your thighs. “Funny, here I was thinking of granting you mercy.”

“Oh that’s how we are playing it, huh?” And just like that he is pressing the pad of his flesh thumb right onto your core, pulling a sharp gasp from you as you tried to close your legs out of instinct only for him to press you down with his metal hand. “You were saying, sugar?”

“Oh…” You moan, back arching as he circles his thumb with a smug smile, leaning into you to pull your lips into a fervent kiss. It draws your breath until your gasping into him for air, your hands woven into his hair to keep him there and save you all in the same go while he teases at pulling your panties down only to pull back in a matter of seconds leaving you there to try and catch your breath. 

Seconds away from achieving your high only to be left stranded leaves you whining and leaning forward to get him back into your arms. 

He tsks at you, pushing you back gently as you continue whining. 

“What will you give me?”

“Anything.” You gasp out, kissing at the wrist of the hand holding you back, nipping at the flesh of it as you reach for him metal arm to pull you back in. He gives in a little, allowing you to press your hips into his so release some of the pressure. “Please baby.”

“Then how about you behave for the last hour, and we’ll go home and get you sorted. Yeah?”

“Fine,” You snip out, tracing your hand up his metal arm before making it to his collarbone and pressing your hips further into his. “I’ll be good. I promise.”

-

“I know you want my touch for life

If you love me right, then who knows?

I might let you make me Juno

You know I just might”

-

And you feel like a fool for making that promise as he leads you through the crowd once more, this time with a pressure begging to be released in your lower belly as he keeps his metal hand on your lower back. The chill of the metal while your body is ablaze has you reeling, reaching a hand back to keep a hold on him. 

You think of all the things he can do to you as he talks with the Galas president, digging your nails into the sleeve of his tux as you push your thighs together a bit, leaning your nose into him to inhale his scent as he talks with a bold presence. 

When that Montana girl comes back you learn that she is an assistant for the program and that little green monster leads you to nip at his ear in front of her before kissing at his neck to leave a lipstick mark. 

He looks at you for a moment, leaning in to give you a peck on the lips before turning to talk to her some more but it’s too late, you’re already in a haze. The green monster and the red flame have mixed to make their very own monster. 

So you pull him in by his tie, pressing your lips to his ear and whispering the words you knew would break him. “Gimme me a baby.”

-

“Let you lock me down tonight

One of me is cute, but two though?

Give it to me, baby

You make me wanna make you fall in love (Oh)”

-

It was the one secret weapon you’ve never used, but have always known about. 

Back in the beginning of the relationship while you were learning the ins and outs of eachother you noticed how much he loved the pill since it hadn’t been too popular back in his day. He loved the freedom it gave him to mark you as his, but you also noticed the lingering gaze on your stomach and or the intent look he gave when you took the pill. 

But you had never been ready for a kid, you wanted to save that for that someone special who you could raise them with. But you knew that Bucky was it, you knew that he was your touch for life. Why not give in?

And the thrill of giving in the second his eyes meet yours makes it worth it, seeing the heat as he pulls you in so tight you might as well be one person. 

“Come on baby, one of me is cute but two though?” You whisper, leaning up to bite at his lip before his hands come up to pull you into a feral kiss as he begins to lead you out the doors. 

-

“I showed my friends, then we high-fived (Ah-ah)

Sorry if you feel objеctified (Ah-ah)

Can't help myself, hormonеs are high

Give me more than just some butterflies”

-

“Easy there.” He grunts out the second you press him into the seats of the limo, straddling him with ease as your nails rake down his chest to begin tracing the buttons of his shirt. “I might feel objectified.”

“I don’t give a shit,” You gasp, ripping his shirt open before attacking his chest with kisses. You take to kissing his chest, dragging your lips from spot to spot in order to mark him as much as you can as he pulls you down to move his hips into your with a groan. 

Your eyes flutter closed at the heat that crosses through your body at the sound, whining out a bit as he begins to grind into you, pulling you up from his chest with a swift pull to lock your lips together as the limo makes a turn. 

The kiss was feral, teeth gnashing, thigh clenching kiss that has you gripping his shoulders and pushing your hips into his a little quicker. Biting down onto his lip when he stills your hips with his hands before pulling back. 

“You gonna let me lock you down?” He whispers, rubbing your hip as he moves you with ease until your legs are splayed over his lap and he can reach between them to pull more moans from you. “Gonna let me keep you forever?”

“Yes….” You whine out the second he begins rubbing at your core once more, this time with the metal hand. The chill of the metal over the fabric is driving you crazy and you press your hips up for more pressure and as a sign you want the panties off. 

He is quick to oblige, pulling his hand to the waistband of them and ripping them off in one easy movement before pushing his fingers back to ease one into your center. “I’ll give you anything you want. But you already knew that when you said I could give you a baby. Didn’t you?”

And just like that he pushes two more fingers in, curling them in a fluid motion as his lips press into the pressure point of your throat. He works his fingers in a fast paced motion as you close your eyes and give into the feeling, letting him suck and bite at your neck as much as he wanted to. 

And once you reach your high he merely speeds up his movements until your shaking in his lap. 

“Atta girl.” He grunts, pulling his fingers up to suck on while you blink at him, still shaking from that orgasm. 

“I love you.” You murmur to him, leaning on for a gentle kiss. He laughs into it, rubbing at the back of your neck in a sweet gesture before putting your torn panties in his pocket and looking to see how close you are to home. 

-

“You make me wanna make you fall in love

Oh, late at night, I'm thinking 'bout you, ah-ah

Wanna try out some freaky positions?

Have you ever tried this one?”

-

The calm ease he had built up for the rest of the limo ride was quick to vanish the second the limo pulled up to the curb, pushing the door open and pulling you out so quickly your legs swing until he pulls you up so you can wrap them around his waist. “You okay?”

“I’m fine.” You giggle, letting him carry you inside until the front door closes and he can set you down to lock it. Even in the mix of all this he can never slack on your safety, and you were sure that once he spent all your energy he would come down here for one last safety check. 

You let him do what he needed to do, walking to the kitchen with a fleeting look to him before grabbing a glass of water to sip on while you waited, legs still a little shaky. But you don’t have much time since he comes around the corner into the kitchen, leaning on the fridge with a small smile as he watches you every movement. 

“Everything locked up and safe?” You ask, moving one step closer to him.

“Yes.” He responds, the deep voice causing a shiver to move down your spine as he takes a step similar to yours without taking his eyes off you. 

“I think it’s so hot you know.” One of his eyebrows raise at your words, the small smile turning into a smirk. “I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone in this world as protective as you.”

He merely hums back, taking another step closer as his eyes roam over your body. “Yeah?”

“Mmhmm. And I was thinking that you deserved an award.” 

“I do?” You almost laugh at how innocent the question comes out, but you don’t have time since your already turning to press yourself into the counter, pushing your hips out and pulling your dress up to expose yourself to him as he audibly growls. “Have we every tried this before?”

-

“I know you want my touch for life

If you love me right, then who knows?

I might let you make me Juno

You know I just might”

-

His hands are upon you in an instant, rubbing at your hips as his body presses into yours to kiss at the back of your neck, and you realize that he is still wearing his undershirt and pants. The metal of the belt buckle digs into your back as you reach back to undo his belt. 

You hear him undo it and get ready, pressing your forehead into the tile of the counter as he grabs your hands and begins wrapping your hands together with the leather belt. And you should be embarrassed at the moan that fills the air once you realize what he is doing before he undoes his pants and you feel him press at your center. 

He’s quick to press in, and you both your moans fill the air as he presses his forehead into the exposed skin of your back before beginning to rut himself up into you. With every aggressive push of his hips into yours the doors of the cabinet on the counter shake, the cold tile of the counter hitting your hip over and over and over as he claims you for his own. 

With one hand holding the belt that is biting into the flesh of your wrists and the other holding the counter to keep you both stable he stands straight and lets free. Every harsh threat is followed by his grunts and your moans, the sound of skin slapping filling the room before the hand from the counter comes to hold your hair. 

It’s feral, and hot. And the feeling of his flesh hand pulling at your hair has you tightening around him enough that he can’t fight his own moan. 

And the second you hear it you are coming undone around him, shaking harshly as he keeps you held up before you collapse, continuing his thrusts until you reach the peak of the high once more and spasm around him. 

Once you come down, panting heavily and keeping your forehead pressed into the cold tile, he works on undoing his belt to release you as he pulls himself out of you and pulls his pants up. 

You are quick to turn on him, tears in your eyes partly due to the intense orgasm and the fact that you still haven’t gotten what you wanted. “Baby please….”

“Easy doll.” He whispers, pulling you into his arms to wrap himself around you, picking you up easily. “You’ll get it. Don’t you fret.”

-

“Let you lock me down tonight

One of me is cute, but two though?

Give it to me, baby

You make me wanna make you fall in love”

-

He carries you into the bedroom bridal style, setting you down at the foot of the bed before leaning down to grab the end of your dress and pull it over your head, kissing his way up your body so slowly you feel like you might just die. By the time the fabric is over your head he throws it to the side, his gaze meeting yours in a tense blaze. 

You knew within an instant that he had gotten serious, and as you kept your gaze on his he let your hands roam until you begin pulling his undershirt off before you reach to undo his waistband. “What’s that look for?”

“Did you know….” He keeps his voice to a whisper as he kicks off his shoes and shucks off his pants, pulling off his socks and throwing everything to the side before moving his hands to either side of your cheeks. “That it’s not actually proven that the amount of orgasms a women has is connected to their ability to conceive.”

“Yeah?” You smile, waiting for him to get to the point 

“I did a lot of research.” He says proudly, “So though the amount of orgasms I give you don’t end up mattering in the end…..they sure are fun.”

And you can’t fight the loud laugh that escapes when he gently tackles you onto the bed, making it bounce a bit as he pushes your thighs open with his hands and pressing them into you by the backs of them. 

“You ready doll?”

“Always for you sergeant.”

-

“Adore me

Hold me and explore me

Mark your territory (Ah-ah)

Tell me I'm the only, only, only, only one (Ah-ah)”

-

He keeps the eye contact, soft and open, as he slides himself between your folds to use your past orgasms as his lubricant before pressing into your center and moaning a bit as he pushes himself in. Whereas the romp downstairs had been feral and fast this one started slow, allowing him to kiss at your face as you adjusted to his size this time. 

His weight presses you into the bed, and your hands find purchase at his back so he can pull himself back before pushing his hips back into yours. Slow and precise, every pull he left a kiss and every push has just enough friction on your core that has you arching your back. 

It had been years of him learning your body and by this point he knew how to play it like the back of his hand. It was his and he liked keeping what's his cared for. When you arched a little more he knew he should speed up, and when you closed your eyes he reached a hand down to grip at the fat of your ass, fingers digging in as he readjusted you both for more pleasure. 

And once you came around him, spasming and moaning loudly, all bets were off. 

-

“Adore me

Hold me and explore me (Ah-ah)

I'm so fuckin' horny

Tell me I'm the only, only, only, only one”

-

His entire weight comes down, crushing you beneath him not that your complaining. Between the warmth of his skin and the mix of your sweat with his you both have traction to move as his thrusts turn wild. 

Over and over at a speed he hadn’t reached with you before, his eyes are clenched shut as he ruts into you, overstimulating you as you begin to sob from the pleasure. Your entire body shakes with every intense hump. 

Between his thrusts you meet your peak once more, screaming out as his own thrusts become erratic and harsher. 

By the time he finishes he leans down to your ear so you can hear the heavy moan that escapes him as he fills you to the brim, shaking and pinching you with his metal arm. And his release seems never ending as he continues to thrust, until you are both completely spent and collapse into the cool sheets. 

-

“(Oh, I) I know you want my touch for life

If you love me right, then who knows?

I might let you make me Juno

You know I just might (Might)”

-

You had managed to fall asleep and only woke up at the realization that he wasn’t near you, vision blurry as you looked around. He had cleaned you up and tucked you in with a glass of water on the nightstand, but his side of the bed was  empty. 

So you sit up, ready to go check on him, until you realize how sore you were and stay on the bed to listen for him. You hear the sound of him shuffling around downstairs to check all the locks before he begins climbing up the stairs. 

You know he makes the noise for you, otherwise he would be as stealthy as an assassin. 

By the time he enters the doorway there is a small smile playing at his lips while you open your arms and pull him in to lay with you. 

“Goodnight.” You whisper. 

“Goodnight, Doll.”

-

“Let you lock me down tonight

One of me is cute, but two though?

Give it to me, baby

You make me wanna make you fall in love”

-

The waiting was the most dreadful feeling. 

Sitting on the edge of the bathtub with the test sitting on the counter between where you sat and where your husband sat in the hallway with the back of his head laid against the door. 

It was silent but not in a malicious way, more of a calming way as his metal hand whirred before the alarm on your phone goes off and you both shoot up to look. 

“Is it…”

“I….”

And you both lean to look at the same time to see just how well those new positions took.

-

[firestarter91]

‘Arthur thank you’

‘You too’

This is one of my favourite Merthur moments on the show, there’s so much going on here but not much is said but it’s loaded with emotion and both actors play it beautifully.

I always thought they had The Poisoned Chalice on too soon when it comes to their relationship because there’s some backsliding later in the closeness by the writers when they started having Arthur being a dick again but this whole episode is one long Merthur fest and that’s why it’s my No 1.

Arthur is so wonderfully soft with Merlin, but typically disguises it with his usual brisk put downs ‘a half decent servant is hard to come by’ and ‘I expect you to be back to work tomorrow’ which is such an Arthur thing to say. However, the way he comes in when Merlin’s back is turned and stares and the camera homes in on him for a beat and you can sense the relief there that Merlin is alive and well, then he quickly composes himself and pretends to be all casual and jokey. It's adorable and so sweet. 🤗

It’s also a moment when both boys reassess each other, Merlin knows that Arthur has risked his life to save him which is no minor thing to do. He’s the future heir to the throne after all, yet he risked his life for a servant and what’s more he done it defying his father and getting thrown into jail. Whilst Arthur has learnt that sometimes he will have to defy his father to do the morally right thing and that it’s not just nobles lives he should value.

Colin looks super adorable and vulnerable wrapped in that blanket!

BBC Merlin 1x04 “The Poisoned Chalice”

[germesthegenie]

“I know,” Grace said, after a pause. “I get that. I get that there’s other reasons. Like the fact that you love those guys and you never loved us. Cool. Makes sense.”

“I liked you guys.”

“But you didn’t love us.”

“No,” I said.

- Venom 29.1

Girl did NOT Cut Ties, I’m Sorry

This line was an interesting one, perhaps not with as much impact as it could’ve had due to the awkward timeskip, though it still works out in that way. Taylor’s just as disconnected from the Chicago Wards as the readers are, the time going by in a blur of Endbringer fights and preparations to stop the end of the world. Despite 2 years with this team, and while she does work with them and grows some level of bond with them over that time, she chose to spend her final birthday with the Undersiders. When she looked for anchors as she lost her mind, she didn’t choose any of the Wards, instead the members of the team she’d been with for an eighth of the time. But that time was before she’d thrown herself into stopping the end of the world, at a time where she hadn’t been as closed off and focused on the mission.

If she’d ended up on this team earlier in her life, or somehow gotten here without the looming threat of Gold Morning, would she have become as close or closer to them than the Undersiders? Or was what she had with the Undersiders more special than anything that could’ve come after, a bond formed when she was at her loneliest, and helped her grow into a person she was happy being?

Also, after scouring the various fanfic sites for Chicago Wards content, I wonder if this line is the reason the most popular pairing for Weaver among the Chicago Wards is Grace (with, like, 2 fics, but for the single digit number of fics this team has that’s a lot). The scene as a whole does kinda have breakup vibes ig, which makes the awkward pause in Imp, Tecton, and Rachel’s trolling scheme funnier xD

[fandomworld9728]

Radioapple Angst Request! - Part 2:

“Why is it that I always seem to find you on the roof?”

“That’s a secret.” Turning to Alastor with an amused smile, he patted the spot next to him. “Gonna come sit with me this time or call me an idiot and tell me to get to bed again?”

“I suppose I can humor you tonight. But only tonight.”

That one night had turned into many more. They were by far some of the best nights of Alastor’s afterlife.

Evenings after dinner on the roof, sleepless nights spent together in Lucifer’s ridiculously large bed talking about whatever popped into their heads, late nights drinking in Alastor's radio tower…

He was not going to lose those moments just because the little king was being a coward. Now if only Alastor could figure out why. Why did he run away like that?

Perhaps their dear Charlie knows. He’ll have to go and ask her before he goes over to the palace. It was always best to be prepared.

~

“No, no, no. Why is it flaring up now? Roo… why won't you just leave me in peace?” He could feel it creeping up his neck. The darkness. It was wrapping around his throat and covering his eyes-

“Lucifer!”

“Alastor maybe we shouldn’t-”

“Nonsense. Isolation isn’t good for the mind. Especially one that is spiraling. Much like your father’s.”

Charlie? Alastor? What in the unholy hell were they doing here?! It wasn't safe! He had to leave. Had to get away and keep them safe-

"There you are sire!"

Shit! "S-Stay back! Don't come near me, either of you!"

"Dad? What's going on- what is that blood goop?!"

Time was running out. He couldn't stop it from happening this time. "Alastor. I swear I will tell you everything if you get Charlie out of here. It isn't safe."

"...Very well."

"What? No! Let me stay and help!"

This was it. As soon as Charlie was out of those doors Lucifer would tell him everything. After that, he would leave, and this darkness would most likely swallow him whole forever. Lilith wasn't here to use her song to keep it at bay anymore.

"Alright. I was promised an explanation." Taking a look quickly around the room, Alastor only now noticed what a mess it was.

Not just from dust or clutter like he had expected to find. Furniture was upturned and looked like it had been thrown, and some looked to be smashed into pieces. The walls and floors had claw marks across them. Then, there was Lucifer himself.

"First, you can tell me about those shadows that seem to be trying to devour you."

Lucifer was silent for a moment, compilating the request. He didn't have time for this. But what choice did he have? He said he would explain everything. So, with what time he had left, he would hold up his end of the agreement.

"It's... the darkness. It's Roo. After what I did... letting evil into the world, I went and spoke with Roo. She made a deal with me. The very first demonic deal... she wanted to always be with me and in exchange she would keep the balance between the light and dark in the world. In people's hearts and souls."

What? Did Alastor hear that correctly? Lucifer, who has always hated his demonic form and everything that came with it, especially in the very beginning, made the very first demonic deal in creation to once again save humans? To right what he and Heaven deemed a mistake?

"But... fuck! I can't even do that right!" Pushing his hair out of his face, Lucifer let a bitter, self-loathing laugh slip out. Along with the tears he had so desperately been trying to hide.

"What do you mean?"

"When I'm stressed, or my emotions become too much to handle, I slip. My control wavers! She takes over my body and senses! Roo is able to upset the balance! Lilith... her song helped. Her singing can hypnotize people. It only worked on me for a couple of seconds, but that was enough time for me to regain control."

It felt... good... to talk to someone about this. He could feel the darkness recede. Just a little, but that just meant he had more time. More time with Alastor.

"It's one of the reasons I would isolate myself. Especially... Especially after I had hurt Charlie- Oh god! Lilith was right to take her when she left! I almost killed my little girl!"

"Lucifer! You're spiraling again!" Reaching out to try and get him to stop pulling at his hair, Alastor was surprised and a little hurt when he recoiled. He had never rejected his touch before.

"You can't touch me! She'll infect you or I-I'll hurt you! Please..."

Taking a few deep breaths to try and steady himself, Lucifer continued. As much as he was worried that he would hurt him, it helped to have him here.

"I didn't want to reject your confession. I was just- I'm scared. I can't take another heartbreak. I gave up everything for someone who left. Who got tired of all my baggage. Honestly, I can't blame her. I knew it might happen one day. I just hoped that she wouldn't have kept me from my own daughter, who I carried and gave birth to since she couldn't. And to just pretend I don't exist!"

~

"Alastor what is going on?!"

It had all happened so fast. Lucifer had transformed right in front of his eyes into a giant Eldrige being, destroying the palace in the process. It was glorious. However, the circumstances were not. Alastor had to fix this. So, he returned to the hotel quickly with a plan.

"Your father is trapped in Roo's darkness. Do not worry, I know what to do."

"And what would that be?"

"That, my dears, is to reassure that foolish king that I have no intentions of leaving. He is forever stuck with me whether he likes it or not."

Charlie and Vaggie exchanged worried glances before looking back at Alastor. "How can we help?"

~

Lucifer hated this part the most. Floating in a void of darkness. At least he was starting to lose himself enough that the screams of his people were beginning to muffle. If only he had some light...

"Salutations! Dear Sinners, worry no longer. For I am here to tame the beast that is our very own King of Hell."

Huh? Alastor? How could he hear his voice so clearly? Wait. Was that... light? A light was just ahead! If only he could reach it! But... he was tired...

"Once he comes to his senses, Hell can enjoy a royal wedding. Between whom you may ask. Why, dear listeners, Lucifer Morningstar and myself."

A wedding? For him and Alastor? He wanted to... no. He could just be saying that. There was no way. Right?

"Including a soul deal forever binding us together. You will not get rid of me Lucifer. Even if I have to hunt you down and drag you back kicking and screaming."

He couldn't believe it. He had to get free, go to him and apologize. The light was shining brighter as he swam to it. Fighting against the shadows and self-doubt for the first time in a long time that tried to pull him back, Lucifer finally reached it! Reaching out the last little bit of distance to grab it and let it envelop him.

In an instance, the darkness exploded off his body and rushed back inside of him, leaving him to fall from the sky. He was too weak to use his wings to catch himself. He barely registered it, but he could feel warm and sturdy arms catch him. Looking up, Lucifer saw that he was back in the care of Alastor. He was really going to have to make it up to him.

Part 1

[gugapuppy]

Abortion - Part 2 (A!Ghost x O!Soap)

Part 1 || Part 2

═══════════════════════════

I made a second part, receive this! Part 3 will be about soap.

CW: Implied infertility

═══════════════════════════

A little further down from the UK, in Urzakistan, Ghost sat on a dusty sofa, with only the sounds of crickets and Farah's soldiers chatting in the background. Ever since Soap had told him he was pregnant, Ghost had withdrawn, needing time to concentrate and clear his mind.

Ghost was infertile, he knew he was infertile ever since the torture he suffered in Mexico at the hands of Roba. Every time Ghost disobeyed, the bastard would kick him in the legs or dope him up with drugs, or sometimes make Ghost drinks gallons of alcohol until he vomited. It was all a perfect combination that led to Ghost's infertility.

He missed the Scotsman terribly, only God could know how devastated he was, imagining that Soap was cheating on him behind his back, not just cheating but getting pregnant by some mutt out there.

Ghost had already prepared everything for their next break, he was going to ask the Scotsman to be his mate, he'd even bought a ring, which was now lying under his bed, he just clutched it as he cried in the night thinking about everything he'd lost. All his hopes thrown out of the window, imagining that he could have a life with someone, that he could be a better partner than his father had been.

Finally one day, after seeing Soap's various attempts to talk to him, he just ran away to a mission in Urzakistan.

The next day after the mission he'd come to carry out, after they'd finally had a chance to rest, Farah came up to him and they chatted for a while, asking how Price was, if he hadn't accidentally swallowed a cigarette yet, asking about Laswell and his wife, and about Gaz, asking if he'd won the promotion he always talked about.

Ghost liked the alpha, she was a great leader for the community and its soldiers, and she even had a partner. Everything Ghost wanted.

At some point Farah asked about Soap and whether Ghost had already proposed, and Ghost froze. This didn't go unnoticed by the commander, who immediately looked into the British man's eyes strangely.

"He cheated on me..." Ghost said quietly, not wanting anyone else to hear.

Farah's eyes widened before a look of surprise appeared on her face. "Soap? Cheating? I highly doubt that, Lieutenant."

"Farah, he's pregnant." This makes Farah shut up and widen her eyes again, she stays silent for a few minutes and before she can say anything, Ghost adds. "I'm infertile..."

"Oh..." She replies. "Holy shit."

The two remain silent for a while. "Ghost," Farah says, making him look at her. "Since when did you know you were infertile?" Fuck, that question sends an electric current through Simon's body.

He doesn't want to think about the fact that he'll never be able to have children of his own, or even a family, now that Soap has cheated on him. He sighs heavily, stopping the tears from spilling over.

"I... was a POW in Mexico a few years ago, their torture was... horrible." -He breathes, memories of the scorpions, fights, hooks in his body, revolt through Simon's head.

"Did they cut your balls off?" She asks, making Simon widen his eyes and choke on his own saliva and cough a few times.

"No, no! Bloody hell, Farah." She laughs a little, trying to defuse the situation.

"So let me get this straight, these guys who caught you, they didn't cut your balls off but they hurt you, and you imagine that made you infertile?"

Ghost thinks for a moment and nods, it made sense that everything they did to Ghost's body resulted in him being infertile.

"Have you had any medical checks?" She asked, her voice starting to get thick and serious.

"No, I don't need it rubbed in my face." Simon was already starting to get uncomfortable with this subject.

"Lieutenant, let me tell you something, maybe you want to deny it to yourself, but Soap doesn't seem like a man who would easily cheat on you and get pregnant by someone random, that man looked at you like you were the sun, as much as Garrick told me about how much Soap loved you."

Simon thought so too, but the proof that Soap was just a little shit and a backstabber was in his belly, growing little by little.

"So let me ask you something, we've got some doctors here, let's run some tests." Swallowing dryly, she looks deep into Simon's eyes. "Do you really think Soap would be bad enough to do something like that?"

"Of course not! But fuck! Just looking at his belly and remembering what he said makes me think otherwise." Simon mumbles the last words, putting his hands to his face and closing his eyes, taking a deep breath so as not to break down.

He feels Farah's hand being placed on his shoulder, a strong, deep squeeze. "Let's give it a try Ghost, it's better to do this than to regret making the wrong choice later."

The hand on his shoulder begins to caress him slowly, with one last breath, Simon removes his hands from his face and looks at Farah, nodding. "Okay... what if I really am not infertile?"

With a smile Farah gets up from where they were sitting. "Knowing you the way I do, you probably ignored him, so you'll have to think of a good excuse, and well, congratulations on being a dad, I guess?"

Ghost gets up and starts following Farah to the medical ward.

One part of Simon hopes that he isn't infertile, and that this is all just a mistake that he can fix, that Soap can forgive him and that they can have this family together, retire from the army and live happily. 

But another part of Simon just wants to believe that he really is infertile, so that he doesn't have to feel that weight on his chest that he feels after abandoning his omega, that he doesn't have to regret ignoring that face full of despair and tears.

The only thing Simon knows is that he's afraid of the future.

═══════════════════════════

Something I want to say is that it makes sense for Ghost to think he's infertile. The reasons, of course, apart from the torture, are the fact that tobacco, illicit drugs, alcohol and some diseases (STIs in particular) can cause infertility if you're highly exposed to them. Which, in this case, happened to Ghost during Roba.

But of course, never assume something you're not sure about, otherwise you'll end up in almost the same situation as Ghost now.

POW = Prisioner of war

[breadvidence]

Using this space to reply to both @blatherby and @fluentisonus!

@blatherby: right right right, "The time has come to journey on/And from this day he must be gone"—and I do think you're correct that standard fanon is he's going into this encounter with the intent to leave, though I suppose I don't know how much by percentage Valvert fic is actually based on the musical vs the Brick, and for the former it's not a misreading per se. I'm thrown, in any case! Really having to recalibrate my sense of the level of his self-harm and suicidality (which still sits at "very nonzero", but slightly lower than "dialed up to eleven", I guess—I think that the line "He was at his own request and through his own complicity driven out of all his happinesses one after the other; and he had this sorrow, that after having lost Cosette wholly in one day, he was afterwards obliged to lose her again in detail" signals that he wouldn't have been able to sustain himself on this course regardless of Marius' part in things).

@fluentisonus said in tags:

#yes!!!! this was something i was thinking abt a lot when i just got here on this last read#& i think contributed to my being more frustrated with/upset by marius this time around than before#i think the other line here is that really stood out to me is 5.8.2:#''He came every day because he had not the strength to take Marius’ words otherwise than literally''#<- which to me does Not speak to someone who is planning to stop visiting.#or at least to actually go through with not visiting#he's in fact willfully taking marius at his literal word re visiting rather than what i think he knows derp down marius would prefer#like he gave marius incomplete reasons & scared him badly (his (jvj's) fault!) but the m jean stuff is i think just intended as a layer of#separation to visiting & that last horrible wrench is all marius. & while not quite unexpected it's not what he (ivj) would have done#naturally if given the choice. in fact as we see it's incredibly hard to prevent himself from going#anyways really good post!#les mis#i think another thing though is that he asks marius to visit when he's quite literally at the door. like. he knows he can't bear#to not have this one thing. like he says all that & asks marius if he should see her again; takes his 'cold' no; gets to the door; & then#closes the door again & turns around to beg to see her <- tbc this is not a disagreement with your point that he always intends to visit#cosette just that both in-book & out of book it's easy to mistake bc it being at the end there makes it almost Seem like an afterthought#rather than i think one of the most genuinely earnest parts of his confession because to him he's been building up to something#he's not convinced he deserves & is asking against his better judgement#But i think this doesn't look good particularly to marius#it looks like he's backtracking on what he's set up#& marius gives in in the moment but it's one of the things he specifically regrets caving to in the next chapter#& i think is frustrated jvj couldn't fully follow through so he decides to force the issue#if that makes sense#hmm also (<- sorry op to come back & add more tags hours later) speaking of the m jean/vouvoyer thing i think you can very much read that#as being not a step towards a final separation but rather a way (to his mind) he can safely & perhaps even more honestly (?) Continue to#visit cosette. he can still see her without being connected to her in sn incriminating way . like you say#<- ofc this is not at all how it comes across to cosette

Yes!!! The level of my "jesus, you murdered that man" feelings towards Marius definitely dialed up a notch by reading the scene through this lens. As I said in responding above: re-reading further, I think it's a misjudgment on Valjean's part—that he can survive on black bread, but not on so little of Cosette—but I do wonder if, in the long run, as she once convinced him to have a fire and better food for her sake, whether she would've rekindled their bond and said to hell with this to the M. Jean and vouvoyer and cellar. Like, she's caught up in a new marriage, in learning what it means to love openly and fuck a man and live in the world, but I like to think given a few more months to settle into things she would've come back around to her papa—because she might not need him like she did when she was alone in the woods, but there's more in love than needing.

Which sidetracks me from "what did Jean Valjean mean to do?" to "what did Jean Valjean actually do?", and in the context of Cosette's happiness—it's always fraught! always makes me holler. Poor old man, and poor child.

I've dithered over making this post because I will feel incredibly silly if everyone else got this on the first go-through rather than the—Lord alone knows how many times I've read this particular scene, actually—but there I was, me and "The Seventh Circle and the Eighth Heaven"—as you do, for idle and entertainment, and I reach

If you will allow it, I will come to see her. I assure you that I desire it greatly. If I had not cared to see Cosette, I should not have made to you the confession that I have made, I should have gone away; but, as I desired to remain in the place where Cosette is, and to continue to see her, I had to tell you about it honestly. You follow my reasoning, do you not? it is a matter easily understood.

And realized that despite the character stating his reason right there in the text I have misunderstood badly. I took Valjean's intent with this confession and in his behavior afterwards to be separation from Cosette, that his desired outcome is to die alone, that he struggles against his love of her to reach that solitude, but it's—not. He says earlier that it's not, as well.

Stay, the unfortunate point is that I have a thread in my heart, which keeps me fast. It is when one is old that that sort of thread is particularly solid. All life falls in ruin around one; one resists. Had I been able to tear out that thread, to break it, to undo the knot or to cut it, to go far away, I should have been safe. I had only to go away; there are diligences in the Rue Bouloy; you are happy; I am going. I have tried to break that thread, I have jerked at it, it would not break, I tore my heart with it.

The thread—to Cosette. He can't separate himself. He would not have to make this confession if he could simply leave her. Therefore he has to confess to Marius for two reasons, as I see it: (1) a big dramatic compulsion to honesty about his symbolic status as one who cannot live in the family of men, sure, but (2) like, real literally, he cannot live in the house. Valjean is practical, he makes arrangements, he's smart, his confession draws from the saint but I think it's also the thief, and what does the thief need? A co-conspirator. Both morally and practically he's averse to living at the Rue des Filles-du-Calvaire, and with both Cosette and her "master" Marius pushing him to move in, he'd have to move totally away, as he's certainly not going to give in—but now he's got Marius' backing to allow him to stay at the Rue de l'Homme-Armé, and he can exist in the in-between space he's always occupied, there in the back courtyard of Cosette's life.

I always wondered at Valjean's vacillation—that he says "To-day, Cosette passes out of my life; our two roads part. Henceforth, I can do nothing for her.", then begs Marius for the right to visit her. But he didn't change his intent at all; he was always keen to visit, to live on the crumbs that scatter from the table. He simply can't pull up a chair.

Marius' passive-aggressive attack on that thread, the destruction of Valjean's heart, Valjean is complicit in accepting that, yes. But he did not come into this parlor looking for that outcome.

🤦‍♂️

[puppyeared]

Odd couple <3

[bogkeep]

unpacking update: everything is out of boxes and there's just a little bit left to put away, but due to my inability to locate two (2) decorative figurines i have entered a catatonic state of autistic distress

[kavehater]

Chappel Roan saying she’s sad she’s demisexual and then there’s me being aroace as a whole like don’t you think I’m even more sad 😭

[anna-scribbles]

I WILL BE SCREAMING CRYING AND YELLING ABOUT THIS FOR AS LONG AS I LIVE YOU ARE SO SO SO CRAZY THIS IS THE BEST THING EVER IT'S MELTING MY BRAIN AND BREAKING MY BONES I LOVE IT THANK YOU

from: thirteen by @anna-scribbles

art by me :)

start from the beginning // read the november chapter // read the most recent chapter (january)

hey listen. look me in my eyes. have you read thirteen by anna scribbles. i think you need to read thirteen by anna scribbles. i think if you want your life to be forever changed you need to read thirteen by anna scribbles. i think if you are a person who is breathing and alive you need to read thirteen by anna scribbles. thank you

[spacemancharisma]

.

[adamworu]

Thinking about how the MPEs have the most traditional divine aesthetics of the Eva series and filled with Kaworu Dummy Plugs. There’s a sense of dissonance of their designs juxtaposed with their savage personalities. It works for symbolism because of the nature of angels isn’t exactly known to man.....

[sevicia]

my parents gave me a box of chocolates for Christmas and I still have like a handful left and I just shared some w/ my sister + mom and they commented on how it's surprising that I didn't eat them all in like less than a week AND that I'm willingly sharing w/ them.

and yknow what yeah it IS surprising cause I used to hate sharing any of my snacks and also got extremely restless when I knew I had snacks like, available, to the point I'd eat them really quickly by myself.

and it's kinda scary 2 me cause I've always had that weird anxiety & protectiveness (?) over my food & not having it 24/7 anymore is like. STRANGE. like something's not adding up ykwim ??

but obviously it's fully a good thing cause I used to feel so so anxious and restless and then when I ate everything in one sitting I'd regret it cause I wouldn't have any for later BUT I also felt like a lot of shame in an angry way when my family would comment on it like "you always eat EVERYTHING" "why can't you just leave some for later ???" "we're giving you a portion and putting the rest away so you don't eat it all at once" . and there's the like general shame that comes w/ being even slightly aligned with being a girl cause I'm literally an entire Man but years & years of being treated like a girl and having those expectations forced on me has put a lot of trash in my brain. like people's expectations of women (whether they are just perceived as women or Actually women)(AKA trans afab people or cis + trans women)(hate that I even have to put a disclaimer) are fucking absuuuurd

[blondiest]

you ever get reminded of how profoundly differently some people's thought processes are and get briefly but violently disoriented by it?