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Abortion - Part 2 (A!Ghost x O!Soap)

Part 1 || Part 2

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I made a second part, receive this! Part 3 will be about soap.

CW: Implied infertility

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A little further down from the UK, in Urzakistan, Ghost sat on a dusty sofa, with only the sounds of crickets and Farah's soldiers chatting in the background. Ever since Soap had told him he was pregnant, Ghost had withdrawn, needing time to concentrate and clear his mind.

Ghost was infertile, he knew he was infertile ever since the torture he suffered in Mexico at the hands of Roba. Every time Ghost disobeyed, the bastard would kick him in the legs or dope him up with drugs, or sometimes make Ghost drinks gallons of alcohol until he vomited. It was all a perfect combination that led to Ghost's infertility.

He missed the Scotsman terribly, only God could know how devastated he was, imagining that Soap was cheating on him behind his back, not just cheating but getting pregnant by some mutt out there.

Ghost had already prepared everything for their next break, he was going to ask the Scotsman to be his mate, he'd even bought a ring, which was now lying under his bed, he just clutched it as he cried in the night thinking about everything he'd lost. All his hopes thrown out of the window, imagining that he could have a life with someone, that he could be a better partner than his father had been.

Finally one day, after seeing Soap's various attempts to talk to him, he just ran away to a mission in Urzakistan.

The next day after the mission he'd come to carry out, after they'd finally had a chance to rest, Farah came up to him and they chatted for a while, asking how Price was, if he hadn't accidentally swallowed a cigarette yet, asking about Laswell and his wife, and about Gaz, asking if he'd won the promotion he always talked about.

Ghost liked the alpha, she was a great leader for the community and its soldiers, and she even had a partner. Everything Ghost wanted.

At some point Farah asked about Soap and whether Ghost had already proposed, and Ghost froze. This didn't go unnoticed by the commander, who immediately looked into the British man's eyes strangely.

"He cheated on me..." Ghost said quietly, not wanting anyone else to hear.

Farah's eyes widened before a look of surprise appeared on her face. "Soap? Cheating? I highly doubt that, Lieutenant."

"Farah, he's pregnant." This makes Farah shut up and widen her eyes again, she stays silent for a few minutes and before she can say anything, Ghost adds. "I'm infertile..."

"Oh..." She replies. "Holy shit."

The two remain silent for a while. "Ghost," Farah says, making him look at her. "Since when did you know you were infertile?" Fuck, that question sends an electric current through Simon's body.

He doesn't want to think about the fact that he'll never be able to have children of his own, or even a family, now that Soap has cheated on him. He sighs heavily, stopping the tears from spilling over.

"I... was a POW in Mexico a few years ago, their torture was... horrible." -He breathes, memories of the scorpions, fights, hooks in his body, revolt through Simon's head.

"Did they cut your balls off?" She asks, making Simon widen his eyes and choke on his own saliva and cough a few times.

"No, no! Bloody hell, Farah." She laughs a little, trying to defuse the situation.

"So let me get this straight, these guys who caught you, they didn't cut your balls off but they hurt you, and you imagine that made you infertile?"

Ghost thinks for a moment and nods, it made sense that everything they did to Ghost's body resulted in him being infertile.

"Have you had any medical checks?" She asked, her voice starting to get thick and serious.

"No, I don't need it rubbed in my face." Simon was already starting to get uncomfortable with this subject.

"Lieutenant, let me tell you something, maybe you want to deny it to yourself, but Soap doesn't seem like a man who would easily cheat on you and get pregnant by someone random, that man looked at you like you were the sun, as much as Garrick told me about how much Soap loved you."

Simon thought so too, but the proof that Soap was just a little shit and a backstabber was in his belly, growing little by little.

"So let me ask you something, we've got some doctors here, let's run some tests." Swallowing dryly, she looks deep into Simon's eyes. "Do you really think Soap would be bad enough to do something like that?"

"Of course not! But fuck! Just looking at his belly and remembering what he said makes me think otherwise." Simon mumbles the last words, putting his hands to his face and closing his eyes, taking a deep breath so as not to break down.

He feels Farah's hand being placed on his shoulder, a strong, deep squeeze. "Let's give it a try Ghost, it's better to do this than to regret making the wrong choice later."

The hand on his shoulder begins to caress him slowly, with one last breath, Simon removes his hands from his face and looks at Farah, nodding. "Okay... what if I really am not infertile?"

With a smile Farah gets up from where they were sitting. "Knowing you the way I do, you probably ignored him, so you'll have to think of a good excuse, and well, congratulations on being a dad, I guess?"

Ghost gets up and starts following Farah to the medical ward.

One part of Simon hopes that he isn't infertile, and that this is all just a mistake that he can fix, that Soap can forgive him and that they can have this family together, retire from the army and live happily. 

But another part of Simon just wants to believe that he really is infertile, so that he doesn't have to feel that weight on his chest that he feels after abandoning his omega, that he doesn't have to regret ignoring that face full of despair and tears.

The only thing Simon knows is that he's afraid of the future.

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Something I want to say is that it makes sense for Ghost to think he's infertile. The reasons, of course, apart from the torture, are the fact that tobacco, illicit drugs, alcohol and some diseases (STIs in particular) can cause infertility if you're highly exposed to them. Which, in this case, happened to Ghost during Roba.

But of course, never assume something you're not sure about, otherwise you'll end up in almost the same situation as Ghost now.

POW = Prisioner of war

[gugapuppy]

sleepy Ghoap part of a page of sketches im doing as a break from uni work. I'll end up posting the rest it just might take a while

[gugapuppy]

Abortion - Part 1

Part 1 || Part 2

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I've been fucking stressed this week, so instead of shouting at the people around me, I've made this anguish here!

CW: Implied abortion

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Okay, but A!Ghost and O!Soap, where Soap accidentally gets pregnant and tells Ghost, thinking that everything will be fine and that the two of them will work things out together, but Ghost, after hearing about the pregnancy, swears and kicks Soap out of his room, calling him a cheater and other things.

Soap tearfully asks in despair what happened, why Simon is acting like this, but Ghost doesn't answer from inside the room. 

Several weeks passed, each time Soap tried to talk to the lieutenant, but each time Ghost ignored him as if Soap didn't exist, Ghost no longer had lunch or dinner with Soap, the two no longer smoked together behind the barracks, even every time Soap entered an environment where Ghost was, the lieutenant always ran away quickly.

The omega needs the minimum of comfort from his alpha, just a piece of clothing with his fragrance, or just a pat on the shoulder, but his alpha doesn't care about him anymore. The two weren't mated either, which made matters worse.

Gaz, Price and Laswell, and a few other soldiers noticed the change between the duo.

Gaz tried to talk to Soap, but Soap, afraid, didn't say anything about the pregnancy and just said that he and Simon had had a bit of a row, but didn't elaborate.

Price tried to talk to Ghost but the man said it was nothing, even though he knew there was something Ghost and Soap weren't telling him.

Laswell also tried to talk to Ghost but it didn't work out, as the man asked to be sent on a mission, and Laswell, unable to do much, allowed it.

After two days without seeing Ghost at the base, Soap decided to ask Price, and Price told him about Ghost's solo mission, that he would be away for at least a week or two.

And at that moment, Soap just bowed his head and thanked him for the information, and then ran to his room, and when he arrived and locked his door, he collapsed, crying gallons of tears inside his nest while hugging an scentless sweatshirt that Simon had forgotten there.

At some point he fell asleep, and hours later he woke up to his mobile phone vibrating under his pillow. When he answered it, Soap heard his mother's voice, and again he burst into tears, remembering that his own mother had been abandoned by Soap's alpha shitty father before he was born.

At that moment he told his mum everything that had happened, about Simon, the pregnancy, everything. The smell of stress and melancholy wafted through the room, anyone in there would throw up or run to give the omega a cuddle.

His mother was very understanding, listening until the end and calming him down as Soap had little anxiety attacks. In the end, Soap asked what he should do, his mother remained silent, debating for a moment what to say to her son.

After a few minutes she said calmly. "If you bring that child into the world, you won't be able to work in the army any more and you'll have to find another job that pays a lot less, plus you'll be forever linked to that alpha who hurt you."

"But he's not bad, Mum." Soap whispered.

And on the other end of the line his mum sighed. "If he was someone good, he wouldn't have treated you like that, darling." A harsh reality that Soap wished were a lie.

She was right, if Simon cared about Soap he would still be here and on his side.

"You should think about what you want to do, you have to think about what's best for you." -She said gently.

They exchanged a few more words before Soap hung up and stayed quietly inside his room and nest, staring at the ceiling and running his hand over his belly.

Gradually, everything about the pregnancy, from the time he found out to the recent weeks he spent alone, sad and abandoned in his nest without his alpha to comfort him, and together with the conversation he had with his mum earlier, Soap made up his mind.

In the gloom of his room, with his hands wrapped around his belly, Soap mumbled with small tears running down his cheeks. "I'm sorry, but I don't want to bring my first son or daughter into a world where he or she will have to be raised by a dysfunctional family..."

Soap was going to look for a clinic this week and someone to accompany him there...

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Idk if there's gonna be a pt 2, I just wanted to take my anger out on something. If u want, say something i guess?

Love u all! 😀

[gugapuppy]

ghost who rejected soap years ago because there’s no way soap loved him. soap, years younger than him with so little experience, couldn’t’ve looked at him with anything more than puppy love. time continues on and things shift. they’re put on different teams and it’s ages before they reunite. they’re both older now, both different. ghost says to hell with it and they hook up. it’s messy, it’s almost everything ghost could’ve wanted. it’s too detached. ghost considers pressing a kiss to soap’s sweaty forehead, staring at the way the hair starts to curl at the root, devoid of gel. soap pulls away before he can. gone is the adoration in soap’s bright eyes, resignation haven taken root.

before soap leaves he stops and turns his head, looking at ghost who’s still on the bed. “I used to really love you, you know.”

and fuck doesn’t ghost know it.

[gugapuppy]

What if Soap didn't die in the tunnels that day? What if the body they had recovered wasn't him?

And almost a year later, Ghost gets his hands on a set of photographs that show that the love of his life is still miraculously alive, living in London.

Now what if when Ghost desperately rushed to find him again and was finally standing in front of him, Soap's eyes showed no recognition of knowing who Ghost was?

Ghost swallows his pain and ignores the feel of the wedding ring he wears next to his dog tags in order to befriend Soap again. Anything to be back in his life.

Well I just posted the first chapter that begins to explore how these two souls come together again in a story about unending and unconditional love till death and beyond 🤗

[gugapuppy]

Tea time!

This is a comm I did for someone

[gugapuppy]

The frames of the video from the comic in the previous post. I experimented a lot with this, it was really fun to work with this chunky brush I found. Also the first time I draw the Reaper of Destruction as it was before Lumity!

More comments under the cut+a frame I ended up scrapping!

I'll go by order of appearance, because it's basically a chronological retelling of the events of part 1.

So the first frame is the least fancy because it was the first and I didn't nail down a style for this yet lol. It shows Ghost and Soap's first true meeting, in chapter 1, where Ghost helps Soap when he gets impaled by a rebar.

The second frame jumps to chapter 8, when Ghost first put Soap in Limbo. The triangle around them was a later addition, taken from the next frame. I love this scene, it's so fun to see it drawn out now :)

The third frame was the most important one to nail the style. I painted a whole frame, only to come back to it the next day and restart from almost 0.

This is the original third frame

They both show the same event - chapter 21, the second time Soap is thrown into Limbo. The difference is, one shows a more literal image of what happened, and the other is more symbolic.

And by now I think you know how much I love symbolism lol

What also bothered me with the scraped painting is that the composition isn't central, and the entire pose, while more dynamic, isn't fitting the mural feel the rest has.

There's an even earlier version of the scrapped painting, with Soap's face, but nowhere else there are faces in these series, so I went wild with it and covered it with flames. He had them behind him already, as the description of this scene in the fic says Soap had a helo of fire behind him.

(also hated how Limbo's victims looked in the scrapped version like... ew lol)

There wasn't a real reason to add the circles around Soap. I just wanted to lean more heavily into the mural style. But I took that circle motif to the end, after that, and added it to Ghost as well, hence the triangle.

Soap has one skeletal hand, and one palm. That one is on purpose, to show he's hanging in between life and death.

The fourth frame is pretty self-explanatory, it shows the part in chapter 21 where Soap gets the dark marks on his forearm. If the colors look weird in that one, it's because I messed with them so much I couldn't tell if they look good anymore on not

The fifth frame shows another favorite moment of mine, the moment Ghost gets his marks, the white tear tracks, when he finally notices Soap fighting in the void.

The sixth frame is my favorite of the bunch. Soap and Ghost, the triangle and circle combined. The moment they killed Graves, Ghost in full control of his subjects, Soap with his sword of white fire and army of burning moths. They look so scary in this one I love them

The seventh frame shows Void and Destruction. Void was straight forward, I've drawn it a few times before, but I had to make a more detailed design for Destruction, and I only had the very first sketches I made for Revenant AU to go off of, as well as Lumity's design. Idk why I designed Lumity before Destruction, but that's how it is. I wanted Destruction melting, like it can't handle its own heat.

The eighth frame is of Void and Destruction combining. In the fic they had in-between states, it didn't look like this, but for the sake of the video I thought it'd be nicer to have a clear frame of them combining.

The ninth and last frame is of our beloved Lumity. Their design is a little more detailed than the drawing I made a while back. This frame is also the only one that interacts with the foreground, aka Makarov. I think he was jump-scared, don't know how much that comes across.

Damn I had a lot to write. Well, when given the opportunity to ramble...

[gugapuppy]

CW FLASHING IN THE VIDEO (3rd from the bottom)

This is it. 3 months in the works, the comic (and video) are finally done.

A little over a year ago, I uploaded the first work in Revenant AU, Ghost's origin comic. I never thought I'd write a whole series for this, but I'm so glad I did. I got a whole new hobby out of it, haha.

I already began working on part 2, but this for me marks the start of it. I'm really excited to get back into this world!

Under the cut there are some comments on the comic I thought some people might be interested in (don't wanna make this post longer than it already is lol). I will upload the frames from the video separately, with comments on it there.

Bottom line is, thank you for letting me just go wild with this :)

Okay, I'm mostly gonna talk about the part where Fate shows Makarov the 141+Farah. Makarov doesn't see the Fate of people as literal images, he often has to interpret odd symbolism in the flashes he gets from the Weave of Fate.

I decided to go for a style I saw in a collection of calling cards in MW3, mainly from this one:

You can really see it in the faces and pitch-black cel shading.

I'll be going in order of appearance, starting with Farah.

Obviously, each of the "flashes" shows the Reaping of each person, Farah being crushed under rubble. Behind her is a helo of green gas, which symbolizes the Russian experimental gas. The motifs around her are more interesting imo - they're taken from the Urzik flag (and yeah apparently it's "Urzik" and not "Urzikstani"... according to the wiki at least). Wings, plants (feels to me like a pomegranate and some sort of crop, but I couldn't find what it is specifically), and a moon, upside down.

I'm skipping ahead a bit, but I've had the idea to make a drawing of Gaz in the Hanged Man pose since I started the AU basically. I tried sketching it once, and it went bad so I gave up lol. But I decided to come back to that here, and add some sort of tarot connection to all of them. I know practically nothing about tarot, googled the meanings of each, they fit well enough, I called it a day lol.

So Farah is the Moon, upside down.

Price is next, showing him taking control of the brain of someone. I didn't use the flag of the UK for the 141 (it'd be kinda boring...), instead I took the Taskforce 141 logo, and broke it down to different elements.

I took the laurels for Price, both framing his illustration and sitting above his head like a crown. I decided he will be the Emperor.

Next up is Gaz, the Hanged Man of course. Gaz gets both the wings and the stars (I changed mine to 4-pointed because... I like them better). Pretty clear why, both symbols relate to the sky. The illustrations kinda follow a rough day cycle, if that makes sense. Farah being night, with the moon. Price with his golden and purple color palette, twilight. Gaz being sunrise, and Ghost and Soap, day. This is why Gaz has a sun behind him.

Ghost was fun because he's the only inhuman one out of the group. I'll let you think what that implies, that even in Fate's Weave, Ghost is an outlier... Ghost gets the skull, and the card "Death". That one was easy, but what I did add is blood flowing down the skulls, like tear tracks...

Soap, the problem child, gave me the most issues as always. For once, it wasn't his fucking face, it was the flames behind him, and overall contrast and readability issues. Soap's illustration is probably packed with the most "hidden" details, though they're obvious if you've read the fic and Konchar's side story. The headless man behind Soap is Konchar himself, holding 4 chains with dog tags on them. The 4 soldiers from Soap's squad, who he killed before Soap was Reaped. Soap's pose is from the moment he came to his senses, after getting shot in the head and destroying a large part of Verdansk. He has 4 swords, pointing at him and downwards, so his card is 4 of Swords, upside down.

Between Soap and Ghost is a circle and a triangle. I'll explain that in the post concerning the video, since that's where I got that from.

If you read all of this, thank you so much! There will be another post for you to read in a moment lol

[gugapuppy]

Nikolai sketch! We love a hard working man 🙏

[gugapuppy]

[gugapuppy]

I made Soap in the new insta avatar creator.

They are so pixelated sadly but isn’t he just a doll.

Edit: I made Simon aswell.

[gugapuppy]

p149, soap carrying ghost's stuff at every opportunity tho

the 141 and gaz's shoulder sorry gaz this is kind of a price chapter

[gugapuppy]

'bout time i drew the otter duo of 141

[gugapuppy]

Entergalactic pt3 by Michal Lisowski

[gugapuppy]

lmao guess who college's eating me alive, sorry for being inactive :(

[gugapuppy]

Silly Halloween comic 🎃 (pretend I posted this on time)

[gugapuppy]