#there’s some other stuff too like board games and books but I haven’t really looked into those

[a-crumb-of-whump]

Saved By A Killer #2: Little Snoop

Masterlist

Content: Comfort, stranger caretaker, [implied] touch starvation, morally dubious caretaker, morally dubious whumpee at this point, recovery, lonely caretaker.

-

Several days passed. Eli was pleasantly surprised to find that each day went by much quicker than when he lived in that cabin. Apart from the wounds and the bruises on his skin, nothing hurt anymore. For the first time in a year, he finally felt something vaguely resembling contentment. 

The only problem he ever experienced now was the feeling of boredom itching at his brain. He’d made a few different attempts at finding stuff to do  - Cohen had plenty of books around the place, for instance. Though it really just looked like a weak attempt at making the house look more alive. None of the books looked as though they’d been touched in years. 

Then, after all other attempts had failed him, he finally resorted to the one thing he’d wanted to do since he got here: exploring. 

The cupboards and the drawers in the living room were the first to be examined. There were many of them, some with absolutely nothing inside and others with random items that held absolutely no context to them whatsoever. Little porcelain dolls, old candles that had to have been there for years, photo albums that he chose to ignore for the time being - the list of things he found was endless. 

The activity itself was rather relaxing, really. At least, until he turned around partway through to find the owner of it all standing there, leaning against the back of the couch with a look of amusement on his face. Eli couldn’t tell if the expression was due to catching him red handed or the little yelp he let out upon realising, but it was humiliating either way. 

“Having fun, little snoop?”

“Shut up,” Eli grumbled. “I’m bored as hell, and I don’t think you can judge me after what you did.” 

The man jokingly held up his hands in defense. “Hey, I told you you’re welcome to whatever. Just don’t get upset if you find something you don’t like. Did you end up finding my stash of board games?” 

Completely disregarding the second comment, Eli perked up at the mention of games and took another look around the room in an attempt to figure out which places he hadn’t yet searched. There were a few, but none of them looked big enough to hold more than one or two small games. ‘Stash’ had to mean more than that, right? 

“Will you play with me?” he asked hopefully as Cohen disappeared into the hallway that led to their rooms. “I haven’t gotten to play physical games in so long. Can you believe my favourite one used to be Go Fish, of all things?” 

“I can, actually. I imagine you were obnoxiously good at it, too.” 

Much to his delight, Cohen had around five different games in his arms when he finally returned to the living room. He looked rather pleased with himself as he set them all down on the coffee table, and as Eli examined each one, he started to push both couches further in so they wouldn’t have to sit on the floor. 

“I knew these’d come in handy someday. They’ve been collecting dust in that closet for years but I couldn’t bring myself to get rid of ‘em. See any you like?”

After some debate, Eli finally decided on Settlers Of Catan, and the two got to setting it up almost instantly while the rest of the games got pushed aside for later. 

“So, how’d you get into games in the first place?” Eli asked conversationally. “I thought, at the very least, killers would be more into video games with, I dunno, violence and shooting ‘n’ all that stuff.” 

It took a moment for him to realise that Cohen had stopped what he was doing to give him a dumbfounded look. Unsure of what to say, he mocked him by creating the same face. 

“That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard.” 

Eli raised an eyebrow. “Really? You’ve been around for nearly thirty years, you work as a goddamn hitman, and that’s the thing that tops the charts? Aren’t you supposed to have cool stories to tell, like in the movies?”

“I dunno what to tell you,” Cohen shrugged, not looking up from the board as he put everything together. Despite the fed up voice he was putting on, it was not hard to see the corners of his mouth twitching upwards as he attempted to hide his amused smile. “A lot of us are nothing like the ones you see in movies, believe it or not. I mean - I am probably the most uncool person you’re ever gonna meet. My idea of fun is sitting by my computer and watching movies while I drink tea, I’m an old man where technology is concerned, and I will not hesitate to eat from tupperware containers when there’s no clean bowls left. Does that sound like any of your favourite fictional hitmen or assassins?”

The answer was no, but Eli chose not to issue a response to that. With a small smile, he picked up his five pieces and began considering where to place them, only speaking again once they were all in their spots.

“Well, for what it’s worth; I think drinking tea and watching movies is far better than anything else you could offer me.” 

“Yeah?” Cohen smiled, something he seemed to be doing more and more with every passing day. “I had no idea you were a tea drinker. Feel free to raid the pantry in the kitchen - there’s an entire section just for tea bags and other related things.” 

“Thanks.” Eli smiled right back at him. “I will.” 

-

Later on, Eli did in fact take Cohen up on the offer. He made two cups - one each for both of them, and quietly made his way back into the living room where the man had made himself more than comfortable on the couch after their game.

“So, can I ask you something?” he asked curiously as he sat down in the spot beside him. Cohen gave him a silent nod in response. “How often do you rescue strangers and take them in? Is this a regular occurrence or am I special?”

“First time,” he responded into his cup of tea. “Usually I take ‘em back to the city or give ‘em a lift somewhere. I’ve actually been on my own for nearly a decade now.”

Eli hummed, puckering his lips as he thought about it. “Do you ever wish you had friends?” 

“No.” Cohen’s response was instant, and there was some weight to his words when he eventually decided to elaborate. “I tried that a few times back when I was younger, but as it turns out, desperation just made me an easy target to abuse. I’d take being alone for the rest of my life over having to go through that over and over again just to find someone who likes me any day.”

There was another pause as Eli considered his next words. He wasn’t really sure what to say during conversations like this. Speaking at all seemed hard enough when nothing he could have said would take away what had already happened.

Eventually, he let out a small sigh and reached out to awkwardly squeeze his shoulder, deciding that something was better than nothing. “Hey, you got me to like you, ‘n’ I never thought I’d say that to another human being again after everything that happened. Doesn’t that count for something?”

“Yeah…” Cohen turned to smile over at him, and despite how hard he was clearly trying not to, Eli could feel him leaning some of his weight into his hand. If he wasn’t such a coward he may have offered him a hug, but truth be told, he’d be lucky to never have to be close to another person again after Lucas. “I suppose it does.”

-

Taglist: @kiss1t0ffm3 @latenightcupsofcoffee @make-it-gay-please @nyooom @pigeonwhumps @topsheepstudent @whumped4whumplover @whumpsday @whumpshaped

[moonstonedrawsrandomly]

Old Faith 6🟢

It didn’t take long for the Bishops to return from their search of the forest again. The whole cult was looking for the missing Bishop. Many people were still searching for him in this moment. Shamura stayed behind this time in the event that he returned before they do.

“Please, on Gaia’s soul, please bring him back safely. Bring my baby brother back safely”

He thought. While he was thinking that, Leshy had just teleported back to his little palace with Noelle on his back. He had to act fast to avoid detection.

“Come, hide here for now”.

This was clearly a bedroom of some sort. A bedroom of a forest dwelling bishop. Vines everywhere, some very cool nicknacks and other stuff. She didn’t get a chance to take it in, because she was stuffed in a crawl space temporarily.

“There is some food in there, don’t be loud. I will be back as soon as possible, okay?”

He said. Noelle nodded. Leshy then pulls his bed back in front of the crawl space. No one really comes inside besides him. He gets out but before he announces himself, he cuts the stitches from his abdomen to make him bleed. Some spots have healed, except this one. Kallamar would have to look at this one.

“B-brother…”

He said weakly. Bishop Shamura turns to not see Heket or Kallamar. But Leshy! He leaps from his throne to his brother.

“My brother! My baby! Are you alright?!?”

He said. He was bleeding from his abdomen, so he was hustled to medical care immediately.

“PHYSICIANS! QUICKLY!”

He shouted. Heket and Kallamar returned shortly after. Apparently they weren’t allowed to scold him until further notice.

While Kallamar was treating him, he was also lifting some residue from his body. Someone tried to treat him

“Whomever tried to treat you was clearly unskilled”

“It clearly was enough to get me home”

“ you are in no position to say that! We were worried sick about you!”

Heket said sternly. Leshy looked away

“I know, this…girl convinced me that my injuries were too dire for me to leave so I stayed.”

Everyone’s heads perked up. Someone actually was able to break his stubbornness?

“Well, if that’s the case, whomever it was did stitch some very important areas closed. Not well, but they are closed and not infected. I guess…it does beat finding you dead. Alright, that should do it. Now I want you to rest and not leave your palace for a couple of days-“

“Weeks”

“Oh, right. Your grounded until further notice”

Usually Leshy would go against it, but then he remembered that he literally had a lamb in his crawlspace so he didn’t fight it. Again, also unusual. Leshy leaves to go back to his palace with the assistance of Heket.

“He’s acting weird, right?”

Kallamar said. They both nodded.

“You think that girl…that girl did something to him?”

“To Leshy? Nonsense! I’ve never seen him lavish attention on anyone like that. You think we need to find that girl?”

Shamura shuts all of that down

“The cult is too weak right now. Leshy having a little playmate isn’t on the agenda unless it impacts his work. I’ll go check on him when I have time”

They said. Leshy returns back to his palace and sneaks into the crawlspace. Now the crawlspace is honestly pretty cool, according to Noelle. Sure it’s a bit dusty but it was honestly like a hidden room. It has a bed, a chest, a few books on a bookshelf, some old board games and some mementos. He finds Noelle with a book in her hand.

“Oh hey! What’s up? Check this out! This is the lady I saw that gave me the wings!”

She showed him the book. Just more confirmation that she is telling the truth. It was Gaia.

“Wow, even you got to meet her. What was she like?”

Leshy said as they spoke. She told him about Gaia, only what she knew, since she didn’t know much about her. Gaia, then hearing them talking, chimed in from Noelle’s back

“-so let me get this straight, your trapped somewhere after Shamura sealed you?”

“Yes, there is a lot of the story that we haven’t explained yet, but for the time being, this is how we can communicate”

Leshy understood, but soon he hears someone calling him. It was Shamura

“Go, Noelle and I will be quiet”

She said as Leshy bolted out and moved his bed back to its original spot. Noelle was now back behind Leshy’s room. She decided to take a nap, since she technically didn’t eat or slept since they left. She didn’t realize she was tired until she hit the pillow.

TBC

[whisperedhistory]

hey isabella!!

oof good luck with that !! yeah the end of the semester is no joke no matter which side of the teacher student equation you are lol

i'm also a matcha enjoyer, but tbh i mostly go for a cappucino or a mocha. tea wise, i mostly just stick to chai at home but living in the vicinity of 1453845 boba places means i've build up a standard order there too, jasmine green milk tea with grass jelly is my little treat every now and then.

aggressively competitive game night sounds like a dreammm (i am. a Very intense board games player) i have an endless letterboxd list of stuff i want to watch but this last month i've been overcome with the desire to marathon the disney cars franchise sooo i guess we're doing that? feeling very nostalgic tbh might watch debs and maybe the holiday to round it all out....

i mean this is the having meltdowns over tv website so you'd be well within ur rights haha but west wing and criminal minds nice! a couple of my friends are huuuge criminal minds fans and tbh i'm too much of a baby for crime stuff but i have been meaning to watch west wing for a while....re medical shows: i have a theory actually and it's that everyone has one medical procedural that's their cross to bear (mine is house md haha) but! i googled beautiful minds and it's based on oliver sacks books?! i loved reading those so i will have to watch this for sure. i'm currently watching m*a*s*h and gearing up for a black sails rewatch come january which i'm vv excited for !

okay question for today! what's your favorite song or album at the moment? i've had the new tamino singles and the new doechii album on repeat :) hope u have a marvelous day <3

love,

t

hi t!

the final day of midterms has officially ended so my students are off to get some much needed rest and i’ll be grading exams from the comfort of my couch (which, in my opinion, is soo much better than having to grade in my classroom).

i’m not a huge coffee person but i do love a good mocha! i’m also in the general vicinity of 1453845 boba places - my go to is taro milk tea. it satisfies everything i want in a drink!! sweet? check. fun color? check. i’m very easy to please.

yeah, i come from a family of intense board game players and i… am no exception. honestly, sometimes my game nights feel like they belong in a sitcom. boards have been flipped, people have been injured while playing uno, the list goes on. do you have a favorite game to play? or one that makes you the Most Intense?

oooh yes nostalgia is absolutely the way to go for movie watching this time of year. the holiday is always a must watch for me in december so looks like we’ll both be doing that! i definitely recommend watching the west wing, it’s SUCH a good show.

your theory about medical shows is spot on… unfortunately, my cross to bear IS greys anatomy. but i will say that i was really skeptical about brilliant minds at first for exactly that reason (like, who really needs yet another medical procedural?) and it’s FAR exceeded every single (lack of) expectation i had.

i still haven’t watch black sails in its entirety! i watched the first episode way back when the show first came out and i’ve been meaning to get back into it ever since.

ooh those are both excellent artist to have on repeat. i’ve been cycling through joy oladokun, katie gavin, pom pom squad, and kendrick lamar’s new albums on repeat! genuinely haven’t listened to any other artists in a couple of months haha

i hope you’ve had a good week so far!!

love, isabella

[stardusthuntress]

You’re not invisible to me either. I know how hard it is to never be seen by the guys who’s attention you want. I’ve always been the third wheel, the one that stands next to the pretty one. I’ve never been the one guys notice. But I’m learning that’s a good thing. That the ones who go for the pretty girls are daft and oblivious and just looking for trophy wives want to spend the rest of their lives being his cleaning lady.

This is gonna sound like the stereotypical answer, I know, but hear me out: I have a feeling you may need a new group of friends. Friends who have other ways of having a good time. See if those friends who you enjoy but don’t hang out with very often maybe want to go to see a movie with you and then get dinner and talk about it for hours afterwards. Or if they want to accompany you to a board game lounge or put together a friend group who wants to play boardgames in the break room at the end of a long day of work. Or dnd! Figure I it when your local airshow is and see who wants to go with you to that. Or if there’s a planetarium or observatory or the local science museum! Post a pic of some upcoming event at one of those (they often have evening events for adults too), and ask different friends than your usual ones - maybe that nerdy guy people rarely talk to but everyone enjoys, or the other people from work who feel the same way. Spend a little extra time in the break room during lunch so that your lunchtime overlaps with at least one other person (might take a few days, that’s normal) and ask them how their family is doing (not them, we all know heading “I’m great” doesn’t help anyone, but their family probably has both ups and downs going on, and it can help to hear about someone else who is struggling too, no matter what the struggle is, even if aunt sally just got her hip replaced, hearing it helps because you know you’re not alone).

I’m still searching for more fun ways to hang out with friends too. So far I’ve only found 1 respite, and there’s only 3-4 people who enjoy it too. Board games. Surprised the hell outta me. I’ve never enjoyed board games, but it turned out I was just playing them with the wrong people. Took me a few years and a lotta tears tho (didn’t mean to make that rhyme, but I’m learning that can be a fun thing instead of a cringey thing, so imma leave the rhyme in there).

Go to the local Barnes and noble. Bring your laptop or a good book - I recommend the Giver if you haven’t read that one yet, or even if you have - and sit in the corner by the cafe. You don’t have to talk to anyone, just do something around good people. Maybe do it over lunch so you can grab a sandwich and some caffeine and keep reading. I promise it will help.

I used to be in the same shoes. One of my best friends was always the pretty one. Guys who come up to talk to her, and when she tried to bring me - the awkward, quiet, homely, nerd standing next to her - into the conversation I’d get a quick “oh, I guess your friend is nice too” comment, and their attention would be back on her. I’m not saying she was a bad friend. She tried. I still love her tons. But not hanging out with her every single day has really helped me. I found some coworkers I enjoy working with who taught me how fun board games can be with the right people. I’m going in circles now, because that’s like the extent of my social life. And I’ve been volunteering for outreach events at work! I think that counts! Getting to show kids the stuff I do is surprisingly fun. Far more fun than sitting alone with my computer actually doing the work anyways. And it makes me feel better about typing numbers into spreadsheets hour after hour. I thought I was invisible too, until the kiddos and the right coworkers showed me they cared and that there were other fun things that eventually stopped the inadequacies from taking up quite as much space at the Im forefront of my mind. It’s still there - I really really wish I could be one of the pretty girls - but I’m learning that the focus on the fun thing is actually making me more attractive than I had been before. Idk why or how - and I’m a scientist so I feel like I should have an answer to that, but I’m gonna let myself be ok with not having an answer - but I do know that those fun things are making a big difference. And the right friends. I was terrified of going to a board game lounge with my friends. Thought it was gonna be exactly the same as all the other times I’d been out and been the ignored friend, but it wasn’t! And now I wanna go back there. Something I never thought I’d say.

It’s the little things you just do because you can and your an adult now that make more difference than you think they ever will. Sometimes the thing your afraid of is still worth doing. My new friend group doesn’t push me if I don’t want to do a thing, they just say “ok, well if you change your mind you’re still welcome to join us” and they mean it. And it makes all the difference.

Maybe we should get a group together on here to do something fun? Even if it’s like we all just sit on zoom and silently write for an hour, or vent about how tired we are, at least we’d all be doing something with people with similar interests. Chatting about what stories each of us is writing could help us all feel better about having friends.l with similar interests. What do you think?

going out is getting harder and harder for me :(

all I’ve ever wanted is to be the girl guys want to come up and talk to. I want to be wanted. Everything I’ve done my whole life, all the growing up and changing and even feeling better about myself…it’s still the same result. I stand around and I feel ignored, isolated and unseen even while I’m surrounded by hundreds of people.

It makes me feel like no matter what I will always be invisible. And that’s why I never want to leave my house any more.

[the-lunar-thief]

My thoughts on the various instalments in the Carmen Sandiego franchise

(Not sure if anyone else will care but I really love Carmen Sandiego so I want to talk about this 😊)

(Please note that these are just my opinions, it’s okay if you liked/disliked some things I disliked/liked)

The video games

Cons

-Very old so there’s little appeal in playing them now (unless you happen to enjoy 80s/90s computer games. There are a couple newer ones too but from what I can tell they’re not too different from the originals)

-Kind of meh but without them there would be no Carmen Sandiego, so they get bonus points for that

Pros

-In basically all of them Carmen founded and runs VILE, and you’re an ACME detective who tracks down and arrests her underlings before arresting Carmen herself, so that’s neat

-Intelligent, strong Latina character created in 1985 (there were some problematic elements, but still, a legend was born)

-Google earth recently made a couple games that are really similar to the originals but look better and use the newest characters, so that’s neat too

The games as a whole? 5/10

This version of Carmen herself? 6/10

The game shows

Cons

-Pretty standard 90s game shows for children. Nothing wrong with that, just a little too dated to hold much appeal now (again, unless you’re into older media)

-Carmen was barely in it

Pros

-That a capella song really slaps

-It was a bunch of kids pretending to be ACME agents and winning prizes for knowing geography (wholesome)

-The Chief was as delightful as ever

The shows? 6/10

Carmen? 6/10

The 90s animated show (Where on Earth is Carmen Sandiego?)

Cons

-It’s an American tv show about geography and culture from the 90s. I’m sure you can imagine the casual racism

-The animation wasn’t very good, especially for the fight scenes (I don’t watch much from the 90s though so idk if the animation was good for the time)

-Written before the age of bingeing so minimal overarching plot and fairly repetitive. Also, they would infodump essentially a bunch of geography fun facts a lot, which was kind of boring to watch (this coming from someone who likes geography)

-Player is a random live action kid, implying that the entire show takes place within one of the original video games (an interesting nod to the show’s roots, but it feels a little too it-was-all-just-a-dream for me). The kid playing Player also changes a couple times, to drive that idea home

-Where on earth is the Chief and who the heck is this annoying white guy? (To be fair, there were some white male chiefs in some of the video games that preceded the game shows, but that doesn’t change the fact that this guy was a little annoying)

Pros

-This version of Carmen is EVERYTHING. In this version, she used to be ACME’s best detective, but she found catching criminals too easy so she became a superthief literally just for the challenge 😂👌🙌 (She also created and runs VILE in this version too) (Also, the way she tips her fedora is fantastic. Carmen Sandiego is the only person on earth who can look cool while tipping a fedora)

-Plus, the only good thing about this version of the Chief was that you could tell how hurt he still was by Carmen leaving ACME to become a thief, and how much he wanted her to come back.

-Zack and Ivy are the main characters (they’re ACME detectives) and they’re only able to (just barely) keep up with Carmen because they can literally teleport, have all of ACME’s resources at their disposal, and CARMEN LEAVES THEM CLUES. You know how in the 2019 show Gray said she was “in a league of her own”? Well this show had that on a whole ‘nother level! Seriously, ACME’s best and brightest can only just keep up with her because she HELPS THEM just to make it more challenging for herself!

-Also, she’s not evil (I’d say she’s Chaotic Neutral). It’s kind of like she’s taken it upon herself to mentor Zack and Ivy (she’s older in this series) by teaching them on the job. She literally only steals things to prove that she can, then she lets Zack and Ivy get it back from her (it’s so funny, at the end of every episode they always say something like “Oh no, Carmen got away! But at least we got the stolen artefact back” like honey I’m sorry but Carmen doesn’t care one bit about the stuff, she’s not doing this with the intention of keeping any of it). It’s like they think of Carmen as their nemesis who they have to beat, meanwhile she just thinks of them as ‘Those adorable kids I have to keep from accidentally hurting themselves’

The show? 7/10

Carmen? 100/10

The 2019 Netflix show (Carmen Sandiego)

Cons

-Sometimes they misrepresent places/cultures, but at least you can tell how much they do their research and sincerely try to be sensitive and accurate

-So far there’s only 20 episodes, which is frankly rude

Pros

-I love Carmen so much

-This is the version of the franchise that I saw first so I wouldn’t even know about it if it weren’t for this

-In my opinion, this one is the most entertaining instalment. The story is great, the characters are fun, the animation is fantastic, and the geography fun facts are actually relevant to the broader context of the episode so they’re interesting and you remember them

-Carmen is perfect in every way

-Of their two main options they chose to model their Chief after the infinitely superior one

-It was such a cool idea to do a reboot of the franchise where VILE existed before Carmen was even born, and she’s a Chaotic Good character who doesn’t work for either side and yet both sides still think she’s working for the other

-In fact they gave glow-ups to a lot of the characters from Earth (Player’s was the best, since he’s an actual in-universe character with a personality now)

-COOKIE BOOKER IS VOICED BY THE SAME WOMAN WHO VOICED CARMEN IN EARTH, SO CARMEN GETTING THE COAT AND FEDORA FROM HER IS SYMBOLIC OF THE FRANCHISE BEING PASSED DOWN TO THE NEXT GENERATION OKAY (also, the theme song from Earth plays when they’re in the elevator together)

-Red crackle and carulia are cute af

-I loved Carmen so much that I spent hours of my life on the rest of the franchise just for more of her

The show? 9/10

Carmen? Infinity/10

[violettelueur]

— ITADORI YUJI + FUSHIGURO MEGUMI + GOJO SATORU + RYŌMEN SUKUNA || HOW THEY DEAL WITH THEIR STRESSED S/O

↳ featuring : itadori yuji + fushiguro megumi + gojo satoru + ryomen sukuna from jujutsu kaisen

↳ warnings : grammar issues

↳ form : headcanons

↳ published : 16 february

↳ pronouns : non specified in headcanon

↳ request : Hello~ recently i just deal with my school math test, It's stressing me out since i didn't manage to pass it. Seems random but can I ask for Yuuji, Megumi, Gojo, and Sukuna dealing with their s/o that is stressed? Maybe because of the same reasons as I did while helping them study?Sorry if I'm asking a bit too much （；￣д￣）

↳ barista’s notes : this one is going to be the last one for tonight since i am really sleepy  ʕ ﹷ ᴥ ﹷʔ but to who requested this, don’t worry it wasn’t too long and i hope you all are doing well whatever time it is over where you are and have a nice day/night eveyone! i hope you enjoy your cup of classic black coffee (jujutsu kaisen request!) and come again soon ╲ʕ·ᴥ·　╲ʔ

When Itadori sees that you are really stressed out, he will first try to make you get away from your books but there is no luck on that since you are really adamant about studying.

During those times when he is brainstorming on what he could do for you to de-stress, Itadori will just slide some small snacks to you like packets of crisps (chips if you are not from the UK), sweets/candy, maybe even a bottle/can of your favourite drink.

If the snacks don’t help with your stressed self, Itadori will drag your textbooks away from you and close it before mentioning you to take a break, even a small one if you had to really study.

No matter how much you try to reach out for your book, Itadori is obviously stronger than you and will make the book out of your reach.

He will test you since you are adamant but please know it will take a while for him to ask a quiz question and will take longer for him to find the answer - if you have flashcards, that will be extremely helpful.

After like 10 questions though, he will give up and drag you away from your studying station to somewhere where no books and notes can be seen.

When he manages to take you away, he will make you sit on the kitchen counter before he starts to make you some food - since I know he is a chef, don’t question me on it.

While that is happening, he will start talking about random things like what he has been watching recently, how his day has been, what dates he has been planning, he is just rambling to make sure studying is not on your mind.

He will give you a few kisses here and there to make you smile since you haven’t been for a while and if you giggle at his jokes/antics, that is a bonus for him.

When the meal is completed and eaten, he will continue to make you be away from studying and will probably play a few games with you, online or board games, it really doesn’t matter - anything to make you get away from the stress you were previously in.

In conclusion, when you are stressed out, Itadori’s main priority is to keep studying out of your mind and make sure something else is since he doesn’t like seeing you stressed at all - he actually hates it.

When Fushiguro sees you stressed out, he will notice it the second it builds up since like I said on many occasions, he is an observative person and notices the frowned look and wrinkles on your forehead.

When he comes up to you, he offers to help you study and, of course, you accept because it’s nice to have his company, and just allow him to help you understand what you are confused about.

Of course, like Itadori, Fushiguro had placed down many things for you to make sure you were eating/drinking like a glass of water/tea/coffee, maybe a plate of cut up fruits or maybe a simple sandwich - he wants to make sure that you are taking care of yourself.

Fushiguro will quiz you in the end to help you reassure yourself that you are done studying and that you are going on a break no matter what he says - if you get a question right, he will go out of his way to give you a kiss.

When he thinks you are done studying for the day - or like a month - he will neatly put away your books, notes and stationary for you before preparing you a bath to help you relax.

If you both are really late into your relationship and really comfortable with each other, Fushiguro will sit beind you outside the bathtub and wash your hair for you to relax - it’s like playing with your hair but also a massge to help you relax.

Once again with the act of service vibes, Fushiguro will help you change into one of his jumpers and help you dry and comb your hair - to be honest, it's really therapeutic for him.

If you apply any cream/moisturiser after a bath/shower, Fushiguro will apply it for you - but please know that he will blush since skin to skin contact, but it feels nice.

When you are done with your show bath/shower routine, he will make you lay your head on his chest, while he has an arm around you to comfort you.

Fushiguro will read a book to you since you have mentioned once that you loved the sound of his voice - I feel like you both have a book that you read together and you both take turns, just a thing I have in mind.

In conclusion, Fushiguro since the beginning will make sure that your stress levels are kept to a minimum since the beginning of your study session and if it goes way too high for his liking, he will act upon his concerns.

When you are stressed out, Gojo will notice instantly since you are ignoring him and not responding to his jokes/childish antics.

Gojo will sit in front of you with his hands on his chin (acting like a flower) and will just stare at you until you notice that he is there

If you still don’t pay attention to him, he will place his hand over your work or textbook to obscure you from carrying one - you know when a cat just puts their paw on your work like it’s nothing...yeah, that’s Gojo.

Gojo is also the type that will dash the book away from you and let it drop to the floor while you stare at him with widened eyes like “what the hell was that for?”

Once your attention is now on him, he will quickly grab your things and put them in an extremely high place where he and only he can reach it.

After that, he will carry you bridal style to the couch where the both of you will cuddle and probably eat some cakes/sweets he had organizsed on your coffee table before he decided to disturb your studying session.

Gojo will feed you like you are a baby - like I can imagine him saying “here comes the train”...personally, I will smack the fork away from me if he did that.

When you are done snacking on some cakes/sweets, best know that for the next few hours, you are trapped in his arms in a cuddling position - probably you on top of him.

If he feels more playful than usually and if you are ticklish, he will tickle you like there is no tomorrow so he can hear you laugh andsee you smile.

If he feels romantic, he will continuously kiss you everywhere on your face to ‘melt the stress away’ since he doesn’t want to see you look so misable.

In conclusion, if you are stressed while studying, Gojo doesn’t even give you the chance to say anything, matter of fact, he doesn’t even help you study. Gojo is the type of boyfriend that is spontaneous and if he doesn’t want you to study, he will not let you study at all.

When you are stressed, Sukuna would have no idea why you are stressed on something so minor in your life - it is not minor, but still this is Sukuna we are talking about.

He will look over your shoulder to see what you are doing before scoffing since it looks like nonsense to him - like I don’t think Sukuna would know that quadratic equations are.

I feel like he will laugh at your misery for a second.

If it is an ancient Japanese text you are working on, Sukuna might feel like helping you understand because you are the person that he loves and only loves.

When he is helping you, he expects your full attention - of course - and if you get something incorrect, he will look at you weirdly and will tell you that you are wrong - but he will continue helping you until you are right.

Once he thinks you are done for studying, just know you are done...no questions shall be asked...no argument shall be said….Y/N, you are done.

He will burn your stationary, books and notes if he has to, he will not hesitate one bit.

If you dare refuse to stop studying, Sukuna will just carry you like a snack of potatoes - basically over his shoulder - before dropping you onto your bed.

Before you can even move, he would just keep hold of you in his arms and threaten to burn your study stuff again and demands you to keep still.

To ease your worries or stresses away, he will start to leave kisses on your neck - maybe a few bites - in a way to make you focus on him.

He will also start to get a bit handsy and will begin to caress your body - meaning like putting his hands under your shirt and all that.

In conclusion, Sukuna will make sure you stop studying if you become stressed and he will do anything to make you listen to him - if he knows something really well, he will help you after laughing at your misery for a quick minute.

© violettelueur 2021 : written and published by violettelueur - do not steal or repost

[whatsk-poppinhomies]

♬ Over Amplified

Word Count : 1.1k

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He didn’t really know how to feel about it, his heart felt like it was frozen, and he wasn’t even sure why he was so scared. What were you going to do? Yell at him in front of the whole class? He wasn’t Sunghoon, you had no reason to be that way with him… But for some reason, he feared the backlash that he might get from you for being a part of the stupid plan that Sunghoon had concocted.

He didn’t really know how to feel about it, his heart felt like it was frozen, and he wasn’t even sure why he was so scared. What were you going to do? Yell at him in front of the whole class? He wasn’t Sunghoon, you had no reason to be that way with him… But for some reason, he feared the backlash that he might get from you for being a part of the stupid plan that Sunghoon had concocted.

“I’m ready for the explanation now.” You said flatly as you sat in the chair beside him, causing the other student who had been prepared to take his usual seat to stumble back and confusedly move to another chair. “I deserve a lot of explanations, and answers actually. I want to know why you and the goon squad had my phone, I want to know why you all decided to upload your weird ass songs onto my playlist, and I want to know if any of you looked through my shit.” You pulled your books out and laid them on the desk, opening up to a blank page in your notebook. “I’ll take the notes while you talk, and then I’ll let you copy them after class. You have a lot of talking to do.”

You did deserve a whole explanation, you deserved everything that you were asking for after everything that he and the guys did, but right now, there was one question on his mind that begged to be answered. “Did you like any of the songs? Who’s was your favorite?” And maybe it was just the residue of competitiveness that lingered around making him want to know the answer, but the way your head snapped to look at him had him backing down from the question immediately. “I’m sorry. Never mind…” He mumbled, the pen that he held between his fingers being flicked back and forth with his nervousness under the pressure of your gaze. “It was…” How was he supposed to answer? If he said that it was a game, it would only make him look bad too. No matter what, Sunghoon wouldn’t be outed, not unless they all wanted to be outed and held responsible as well. “You’re so mysterious…” He started and you scoffed, rolling your eyes as your face scrunched up with disbelief. “And we just wanted to get to know you… And I know the song thing is a crazy way of doing it… But… That’s how we feel when we’re around you…” Blatantly lying to your face was something that he never wanted to do… It was something that he wasn’t even good at in general, but your demeanor seemed to soften, and he almost felt worse about making you believe that nonsense. “I promise though, we didn’t go through your stuff, we didn’t do anything on your phone except add to your playlist, I swear…” At least he could say that he himself didn’t do that, but he couldn’t really vouch for the others even though he already was.

You snorted quietly, your tongue pushing against the inside of your cheek as you stared at the board at the front of the class where your professor was writing something that you could barely pay attention to. “Well… next time you want to get to know someone… just talk to them. Don’t steal their shit.” You mumbled, and when Heeseung looked down he could see your leg bouncing under the table. “And Sunghoons was a joke, right? I mean… he’s an annoying asshole and I’m pretty sure he hates me… which is crazy because I haven’t done anything.”

Heeseung pursed his lips, leaning against his hand and staring at you. “He said you humiliated him in front of the employees at radio shack… but I don’t think he hates you.” He mumbled, although he was pretty damn sure that Sunghoon hated you more than anything and anyone else on campus, but he wasn’t really sure why.

“I humi-“ You started, scoffing loudly as you tried to hold in your laugh. “He humiliated himself. Who looks for an amp in a radio shack? I was simply trying to inform him that doing some research beforehand would have saved him the time and the trouble.” Your pencil scratched against your notepad momentarily to jot down the notes on the board before you turned to look at him again. “Plus, he annoys the hell out of me daily, why would he write a song like that? Actually… what the hell do any of you want from me? What’s the point?”

Heeseung scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, cursing himself for offering to be the one to explain to you first. He wasn’t prepared for this, and now he had to wing it. “You don’t like any of us? I mean, we all can’t be as bad as Sunghoon…” Maybe if he opened the door, if he put the ball in your court you’d give him something easier to flow with.

“I don’t know any of you… I don’t know if any of you are better or worse than him… And I don’t know how you all planned on trying to prove yourselves, but I’m busy.” You stated, picking up your pencil once more to fill in the last little bits of notes before passing the book over to Heeseung. “And I’m just letting you know that if this was some stupid prank… You all failed. I’m not falling for it, so, thanks for the phone back, but I’m not an idiot. Bring my book back tomorrow morning.”

You pushed yourself up from your chair to leave, Heeseung scrambling behind you as he shoved his books into his own bag and slung it over his shoulder. “It wasn’t a prank… we really wanted to get to know you better. Maybe I can take you out for coffee or something later after your classes?” He said, looking down at you as you shook your head, smiling sweetly up at him.

“No thank you. You’re throwing up some major red flags and… I don’t have any reputation in this place, but I’d rather not be known as the one who fell for Sunghoon and his goons stupid game, so… no. I’ll see you tomorrow.” You pulled your hoodie up over your head, walking faster towards the doors to go outside as Heeseung stood in the middle of the hall watching after you.

You weren’t stupid at all, you had caught on immediately, and now he was the one who felt like an idiot, he was a total fool, and he hated Sunghoon for putting him in this position.

<- / masterlist / ->

[barzzal]

between halls and thin walls → part four

summary: friends who fool around almost never works. almost.

↳ pairing: mathew barzal x you

↳ warnings: idiots, that’s all <3

↳ genre: fluff, angst, smut, roommates au, best friend’s best friend, friends with benefits, 18+

↳ length: series; part one, part two, part three, part four (6.7k), part five, part six

↳ masterlist: the barn

↳ track: my favorite part by mac miller, addicted by jorja smith, someone to spend time with by los retros

note: finally got myself to update this fic oml zzz quick psa tho, this will now be a six-part series! hope that’s okay and yenno as always, would love to hear what you think about this (validate me in the tags pls im lonely) happy reading babes! <3

“Yo, grandma. Haven’t you had too much tea to drink?” his voice echoes in the room as soon as he walks into it. You carefully set the cup down on the dining table and looked at him exasperatedly. 

“Haven’t you had too much care to give?” you snark back, earning yourself a disappointed look from him. 

“Really, y/n? That’s the best you’ve got?” he shakes his head at your appalling retort.  What a shame.

You were good at pissing him off to be fair. You just weren’t in the mood to throw teases back and forth especially now that you’re feeling particularly vulnerable.

The week has been far too dreadful for you and you know that you’re willing to grovel your way into the weekend to finally have the time to slack off, not worry about taking a bath, and just go crazy with a pint of Ben & Jerry’s.

However, just like always, Mathew seems to never run out of ways to get on your nerves. 

He carelessly puts his stuff on the table, causing a fairly loud thud on the surface. 

You let out a deep breath, massaging your temple. 

“Somebody’s cranky.” he grins. Not necessarily the kind you’d want to see from him. 

You try to ignore him for a few minutes but you can’t help noticing how his build easily took over much of the space you’ve already been occupying. You irkingly look up at him, closing the book you were reading. You meet Mat’s eyes who just innocently looked back into yours. Waiting. Possibly plotting on yet another sophisticated way to toy with you.

“You’re a child.” you roll your eyes and return to your reading. He says nothing and instead rests his chin atop his enclasped hands, continuing to bother you with his ridiculously beguiling eyes. He presses his lips together before sighing dramatically. 

“What?” you snap, finally shutting your book down as you look at him. 

“I wanna go out.” he looks up at you in an effort to make his huge physique smaller than it really was. 

“Then go out. You’re a big boy.” you breathe. 

“You just said that I’m a child.” he coos, mimicking a five-year-old’s voice. 

“Stop that.” you glare at him. Mat props himself back and laughs, “Come on. I’m bored.” 

You open your book again just as you reply in a tone that Mat’s getting used to hearing. “Boredom doesn’t give you the right to pester me, Barzal.” 

And as an exchange, he speaks in the same tone rather mockingly, “And so is that attitude, Y/L/N.” 

“Come on, y/n. Let’s go out.” he now pleads, looking up at you with what seems to be his worst impression of a ‘puppy eye’.

“Fine.” you finally concede and you see Mat’s beaming smile instantly. 

“Where’d you want to go?” you ask as you take your reading glasses off.

“Dunno.” He shrugs, obviously teasing. 

On the edge of being irritated, you say, “Are you kidding me?”

“Grandma.” he mumbles before saying, “Do you have anything you want to do? And please don’t say book hunt.”

You suppress a smile and maintain your composure. “I’m craving for pancakes right now but I also wanna drink. Go to a bar or something.”

He nods in agreement. Already stitching his game plan.

“We can do both.”  he bobs his all too fine brows.

He didn’t have a hard time getting you on board with his spontaneity. You actually haven’t gone out in a while and the thought of a possible night out doesn’t seem to be so bad of an idea.

You’ve been with Mat to parties and while the two of you don’t mingle as much as the other guys did, he does know his way around the club. The dance floor, however, he tries. He really does.

For about an hour Mathew waited patiently in the living room as he scrolled endlessly on instagram liking a few photos and laughing at posts the fans tag him occasionally. His eyes were peeled away from the screen when he heard the door to your room click. His irises trail onto your body even if he didn’t plan to originally. 

Mathew, albeit dressed simply in his black turtleneck sweater and a beige overcoat exudes just about the right ‘swag’ (as per how he puts it) to stop you in your stupor. Although what you didn’t know was how you weren’t any different in his eyes. You were dressed quite nicely in a black lace bodysuit with a pair of blackpants accentuated by the black boots you usually wear on a night out. Your coat was slung on your forearm whilst you held your clutch purse in your hand so you could close the door with the other. 

“What?” you blink just as you look down to eye yourself. Feeling a tad self-conscious under his gaze.

Mat immediately breaks it off. He clears his throat, pretending to wipe off the non-existent dust on the accent table. 

“What?” he mirrors with an arched brow.

You shrug off his demeanor, snatching your keys from the accent table before putting it in your purse. 

“Have you called a lyft already?” he nods, absentmindedly scratching his temple. 

“You ready? You look— decent.” He says, trying to act casual and distant when he gives you the compliment.

Not noticing the unfamiliar look his eyes had, you return the compliment and say,  “And so do you. Good job for not looking like you came straight out of an H&M catalogue.” you wink at him with a grin. A thing which was then reciprocated by a deadpan look on his end. 

Before he could even come up with yet another clever way to come at you, you start walking towards the door, looking at him once as you motion the way by curling your finger.

“Haul ass, buddy.”

𖥸

10:15 PM 

Mat decided to bring you to the usual place he goes to when he wants to be alone and just enjoy a couple of beers while he chats with River, the bartender he eventually befriends after years spent drinking in solitude. 

The bar had a rustic feel filled with wine barrels in the corner of the room. The seats were leather (mind you, it wasn’t the kind that gets easily worn out through time) and everything looked new to you regardless of all the vintage stuff displayed articulately on the brick wall. A turntable was set on the table stacked with vinyl records, most of which were from the 70s to 80s underneath.

It was obvious that it wasn’t the kind people would know about. Aside from it being located at such a secluded street leading to the suburbs, it wasn’t the type of bar kids would want to hang out in. It only had a few customers and most of them wore suits and came with company. No one really gave a hoot when you walked in with Mathew, aka, the face of the New York Islanders. Which is basically the reason why Mat kept coming back to the place. He felt comfortable and at peace. Almost in retrospect to being at home hanging with his father. 

“I can’t believe this place exists.” you say, mouthing your thanks to River as he hands you both of your drinks. The man that’s definitely aged like fine wine smiles, nodding his head over to Mat who was doing the same before he headed back to mix another set of drinks. 

“Me neither.” he grins, reminiscing about the time he’s found the small pub by accident. 

“This place looks expensive though.” you whisper, making Mathew laugh. 

“Well, it kinda is.” he sheepishly chuckles. “River’s filthy rich.”

“Is he really?” your mouth falls and you look back over the build of the old man. The way his salt and pepper hair was neatly slicked back makes quite a compelling case for what Mat had just said. 

Mat eventually explains who he was. Apparently, he was just another bored fancy man who happened to love making people drop dead and drunk with his over the top mixes. His dark deep set brown eyes are quite of a crowd favourite too. Case in point, the group of ladies seated from across you and Mathew.

“Hey.” you absentmindedly call on Mat who had just sipped on his drink. “I know what we should do.”

“All right.” he puts the glass down, “Lay it on me.”

“Let’s fix you up with one of the girls over there.” you suggest, leaning towards his body so you could get a better view upfront. Mat does not move and instead follows your finger subtly pointing at the other end of the room.

“What’s with the sudden fixation of getting me bagged tonight, huh?” he smirks, shaking his head at the idea of having to go home with some random girl. You give him a side eye as you move away from him. 

“Fixation is an overstatement. We’ll be here long enough for us to get sick of each other.” you explicitly told him. 

Mat eyes you intently. Searching if there was even the slightest doubt in your eyes. 

Long enough to get sick of each other. 

He clears his throat instead and looks across the room. “Which one?”

A gleeful cheer erupts from you just before you look over the girls in question. “What’s your type?” you ask him, not sparing a glance.

Mat looks down on you underneath the bar lights accentuating your features. Your eyes had a certain glint in them that Mat still can’t get a grasp on. Something that was just enough to spark something inside him. He didn’t want to overthink it nonetheless. It must have been just the lights. 

Once Mat sensed that you were about to look at him he immediately turned his gaze forward, squinting his eyes a little pretending to check out the women you’ve been eyeing for the last minute. 

“I don’t really have a type.” he shrugs, casually taking the fragile glass to his mouth. 

You dismiss what he said at once, “Do I look like a child to you? Just answer it.”

Mat shakes his head, “I told you. I don’t have one. If we vibe then we vibe. Simple as that.” 

You did not believe him but you decide to drop it off. Instead, you look back and return to your new found mission. Across the bar, seated were three girls busy talking to each other. 

“Got it.” you tell Mat, nodding your head towards the clueless girl sitting right across from where Mathew was. “The one in the center.” you add. “The one wearing a white bodycon.”

“She’s pretty.” he nods, validating your taste as his potential wingman. “Nice smile.”

Your hand met a firm slap on the table as you went on cheering for him. “Well? Go then!” you give him a nudge, taking it back quickly when you feel a slight hesitation on his part, “Don’t tell me you need me to introduce you?”

He takes the remainder of his glass and shaked off the kick it had in his throat. “You just sit and watch, babe.”

You do as you’re told and lean towards the bar, your elbow carrying all your weight whilst you sip on your half-full martini. 

Mathew’s stance and the way he carries himself immediately caused the girls to notice him coming. Of course, you weren’t really surprised. You watch him approach her,– reading along the words leaving his mouth. There was an exchange of proper ‘hello’s’ as Mat introduced himself to the girls. He reaches out his hand and the curly noirette in the center gives him a firm shake. 

Mat’s eyes momentarily locked with yours just as you see their hands linger in the air— tangled long enough for him to make a quick segway. He winks your way as he sees you grin from your seat, shaking your head just after you felt the need to take a deep breath. A thing you assumed to be because of the drink. So, while Mat leads the girl to one of the empty booths and sits across from her, you call on River and ask for another drink. 

Mathew must have lost track of time by the second drink he shared with Zoe. He learns that she’s from upstate and was just on the island to visit her friends. She’s still working on her major at NYU; coincidentally in the same field as Lianna so that was one of the things they’ve talked about first hand. She wasn’t really into sports so Mat steered clear of his job because he didn’t want to bore her. 

“So…” Zoe smiles and tucks her hair behind her ear. “What’s the deal with you and the girl you’re with?” 

By the time she asked about you, only then did Mat remember who he was originally with. 

“Oh! She’s—” he looks over to where you’re seated only to find you laughing— no giggling with a man that was obviously a few years older than you. He’s wearing a neat black suit and a button down shirt with a couple of its first buttons opened. Zoe sees him frown, evidently losing his train of thought. 

She calls him with her sweet voice, “Mat?” 

“Yeah?” he absentmindedly answers, not wanting to take his eyes off of your hand that was now gently pushing the man’s arm whilst the two of you continue to burst into laughter. 

“Are you okay?” she asks.

What’s so funny? 

Finally, Mat hears Zoe’s distant voice that eventually took him back to his seat.

“Oh. Y-Yeah.” he apologetically smiles. “Sorry. What were you saying again?” 

She hesitates to ask about you after taking a quick glance your way upon seeing the way Mathew looked at you. Nevertheless, she decides to go for it.

“Aren’t you two together? I don’t want to come off strong here or anything. It’s just that I don’t want to get in between something if there ever is.” 

Mat looks at you one more time and as if you’ve felt his eyes all along you turn your way and meet his gaze. You shoot him a quiet smile, eyeing the guy sitting beside you, mouthing what he assumes to be an exaggerated “So hot!” on your end. He reciprocates your smile and gives you an approving nod.

Once you looked away, that’s the only time Mat finally answered the woman waiting patiently for his attention. 

“What?” Mat shakes his head wildly, blowing out air off his lips defensively. “No no no. We’re just friends. She’s my roommate actually.” he shrugs you off his mind and instead tries to put his entire focus on her. 

The remaining hours were spent with you and Mat getting along with your respective potential hook-ups. Not that it wasn’t the endgame either of you were hoping for at the back of your minds. 

He’s got to admit that Zoe was the kind of girl he’d be interested in. Another fact he’s kept a mental tab not to mention to you because he knows you’ll just get cocky. 

She was sweet and obviously eloquent. He knows she’s way smarter than he’ll ever be. But out of all those qualities, she was just as passionate at her craft as someone he likes to think he knows well enough. And that alone made a small smile creep on his lips. 

Nonetheless, despite all the aforementioned, Mathew found himself a bit more reserved than he usually is whenever he gets to meet and talk to his potential ‘lady friends’ as how you’ve put it countless times. He just wasn’t his exact self.  And he was beginning to question it. 

There were no fancy hockey plays thrown subtly into the conversation. Neither mentions of golfing nor over the top league events.  No butchered french pet names swiftly tucked in his sentences. And no endless questions that would eventually lead to something along the lines of ‘Do you want to get out of here?’

Well, not until Zoe’s friends got up their seats and she told him herself. 

“Hey. The girls and I are meeting up with some friends in Brooklyn. D’ya wanna come?” 

Mat’s eyes trail down to her hand now gently caressing his. He raises both his brows thinking of a possible ‘out’ because he wasn’t sure if it was a smart thing to leave you alone with a stranger. 

He hums, “Sure.” 

Zoe shows him a delighted smile before eventually sliding out of the booth to walk towards the bar she and her friends were formally seated. 

“I gotta use the restroom first. Please excuse me.” she gives him a nod before going back to chatting with her friends. 

You, on the other hand, see Mat leave the table aiming for an archway you presume to be where the loo was. 

“Hey,” you call the man whose name you’ve already forgotten. Your pause was long enough for him to acknowledge the chances that you actually did forget who he was. Obviously.

“Chris.” The man in his early 30s answers with a submitting grin. 

You shyly laugh, squeezing his forearm as you try to apologize for forgetting. 

“Would you mind if I use the restroom?” you politely ask. 

“No, not at all.” he replies and immediately stands to help you get on your feet. Gentleman. 

Once you are in front of the men’s room, you anxiously wait for your wingman. You hug your purse close to your chest. Not a whole minute after, the door finally opens and you meet Mat’s irises with quite a gleeful look. 

A look he wasn’t a fan of for he knew what’s about to come next. 

“Are you taking off?” you eagerly ask, almost hopping on your feet. 

Mat eyes you from head to toe, looking for signs that would stink from a drunk y/n. When he sees none, that’s when he decides to say that he was. 

“Mkay good. I’ll be on my way too. Chris is taking me to New Jersey.” you tell him, briefly looking through the archway to see if there were people listening.

Once you know you’re clear, you lean towards Mat, your lips dangerously close to the sensitive skin of his ear. Mat feels your heated breath sending a familiar tingle up his spine. “I’ll get to ride a yacht tonight.” you bite your lower lip and giddily smile as if you were a cheeky 16 year-old usually depicted in a coming of age movie. 

“Who’s Chris?” Mat, in spite of taking rounds observing you all night, finds the need to ask. “And why are you coming with him to NJ?” he further questions. 

“Uh– okay, dad.” you step back for a second. You let out a scoff, checking if he was being serious about it. “I thought we’re supposed to go get laid tonight? Weren’t you about to take off with that girl yourself?” 

Mat averts your gaze and starts to scratch the corner of his brow. “Well yeah. It’s just that— he looks sketchy.” he pauses, “plus… isn’t he a little too old for you?” 

You roll your eyes as you’ve already expected to hear the words from him. 

“He’s 31. He’s not that old.” you say rather defensively so you turn the ball back on his court. “And what if he was?  Didn’t you ask one of the moms out??”

Mat’s eyes widens and you try to bite back a laugh. He whispers with a biting tone, trying to save himself. “She didn’t look like one! I’m gonna kill Beau I swear to god.”

“Come on Barz. Don’t be such a killjoy. Text me if you need anything, okay? Wrap things up while you’re at it.” you say at once. Mat doesn’t get the chance to talk you out of such a stupid idea because before he even could, you’ve already planted a kiss on his cheek and started walking away. 

Mat waited for the sound of the heavy doors of the bar, signaling that you and your friend have gone, before stepping back to where Zoe was. She waves him near the coat closet. 

“Hi.” Mat greets her friends before eventually turning his attention on the unsuspecting lass. She meets her with a smile (just like what she’s been doing all night). The same smile, however, drops the second Mat opens his mouth. “Can I talk to you for a sec?” 

Zoe nods and willfully abides, letting Mat take her gently by the arm. 

“What’s up?” she innocently asks. 

“Something came up.” he says a little too fast than what he’d originally intended. He was going to let her down either way might as well get it over with and rip up the asshole band-aid. 

“Oh.” she says in a tone Mat knew that she completely understood. 

“No worries.” she looks at him with a knowing look in her eyes. “I’ll see you around then.” 

He gives her a kind smile and nods. ��Take care.” 

Mathew walks towards the bar, catching River’s teasing grin whilst he cleans up after the bottles left on the center of the counter. 

“What?” Mat reacts defensively, taking a seat in front of the lone bartender. River faintly shakes his head to leave just enough curiosity in Mathew’s mind. 

“You’re such a tool, old man.” the kid says aiming for the cold beer River has put away for himself. River did not mind because he’s grown fond of the star player for the past years he’s spent going on late night drinks at his bar. Years that even justifies a proper amount of time for him to know the in’s and out’s of one Mathew Barzal. 

“I haven’t said a thing.” he shrugs amidst the already wide grin on his face. 

There’s wisdom in his eyes that Mathew has always admired. He wasn’t the guy who’d want to talk about what’s going on inside his head but with how River’s pub seems to be just the right place, he eventually concedes and takes a shot to pick on the old man’s brain.

“Come on, spill it out. I know you’re going to anyway.” Mat gives in, running his thumb on the moist label of the bottle. 

River wipes his hands before resting it atop the counter. “Well, it’s just that– I ain’t used to seeing you turn down ladies like that too often. And you’re definitely not one to stick around watching me clean up.”

Mat stays silent for a moment, as if to gather the exact reason as to why he chose to stay. He still has a long way to go before figuring that one out. He wasn’t exactly as sharp as he was on the ice.

“I don’t know, man.” he chuckles tirelessly, “I guess I wasn’t in the mood. That’s all.”

“You?” River shots a brow and dismisses him, shaking his head. When Mat doesn’t answer, he carefully picks on his choice of words and lays it down carefully for him. After all, Mathew should have known that River was old enough to not know what’s going on.

“Though I gotta be honest with you, hijo. Never imagined you’d bring someone here.” he starts. 

What must have been a shot in the dark for the old man was just enough to tear Mathew’s eyes away from staring at the water beads on the bottle.

“What?”

“The girl, Barz.” he says, banging on the head of the bottle to knock the cap off. “She a friend?” 

“What? Y/N?” Mat quirks his brows trailing off where River was exactly headed, “What about her?— Oh, her? Yeah, no. She’s just a friend.”

“She pretty.” he speaks in a sound accent, not wanting to let Mat know he’s growing to like catching the young lad off guard. Mathew nods casually despite the continuous blabbering. “She’s y/n. But yeah— I guess, she is pretty.” 

“Then what are you doing being just friends with a pretty girl?” River inquires, taking a sip of his beer. When he sees him trying to register what he’d just said he then adds, “Why not be with her? Date her?”

“Psh. What? Date y/n? That’s crazy.” Mat shakes his head furiously, “You’re crazy.” 

“What’s so crazy about that?” River takes offense, laughing at the child’s naivete. 

“I can’t date her. I mean— I won’t date her.” he takes the bottle to his mouth, taking a large gulp before continuing, “We’re in this weird relationship thing. A setup, actually, and it’s— it’s crazier than dating her. I swear, you of all people won’t get it.” 

“What makes you think I can’t?” he smirks, “I’ve had my fair share of crazy.” River points out despite the hesitation in Mat’s eyes. “I got all night, kid.” he adds, letting him have the floor to himself. 

“You really want in on this?” he second guesses, not wanting to bore the man with his personal life.

River leans against the brass counter just below the lit rack of vintage scotch displayed on the bar. He then gestures him to give a piece of his mind and Mat finally submits to his offer.

“We’ve been in a few… prior engagements,” he starts trying to find the appropriate word. “Well, sort of.”

River hums, not necessarily getting on the same page as him so he decides to be upfront about it.

“We’ve… slept together.” he confesses.

“So you used to date her?” the old man asks. 

“No.” he answers, “I told you we’re just friends.” 

With furrowed brows, River takes a minute. And once Mat hears an all too familiar “Oh.” he sees him break a chuckle, shaking his head at the thought of what Mat had just told him. “You kids have way too much fun these days.”

Mathew shrugs, “Hey, I warned you. Told you you wouldn’t get it.”

“Okay, make me understand something here. You two sleep together, fool around, do all that shit.” he says, “and you swear you’re not in a relationship?”

“Nope.” Mat answers with pride, popping out the word with a hard ‘p’.

“Huh.” River clicks his tongue, “How long have you two been… engaged?” 

He rolls his eyes when River uses his word, “About two months.” he answers shortly.

“Is she seeing anyone since you two started this thing? You know, casual dates, the ones I presume she’s been getting before you got her into this mess?” he asks him in a tone that only fathers would ever dare to use.

Mat thinks for a moment, trying to recall the last time he’s seen a guy pick you up for dinner besides the old man you’ve successfully bagged for the night. He firmly shakes his head no and simply says, “At least not in my recollection.”

River willfully nods, walking Mat right into the trap. “Well have you been seeing anyone lately?” he asks again, this time slipping a hint of assertion. He hears a crystal clear ‘no’ from the forward and that’s when he broke a goading grin. 

“And you’re telling me you two aren’t together?” he asks yet again, getting on Mat's nerves as he continues to flood him with biting queries, building up the final point he was about to break on Mathew.

“Rivs, for the hundredth time, no. We are not.” he clarifies. 

Mat watches River pour himself a glass of scotch, still wearing a smug grin. “Imma give you a piece of advice, yeah?” he smiles rather teasingly and doesn’t wait for Mat to rebut, “I’m a happily married man so I don’t know a single squat about dating nowadays, but if you’re telling me that you kids aren’t sleeping with anyone else but yourselves? Looks like a damn relationship to me.”

With his brows all quirked in confusion (and denial in the very least), Mathew gathers all his might just so he could refute whatever madness River was trying to inflict on him and screw him up in the head. But before he could even open his mouth, the sound of the heavy doors was all it took to tear up both River’s and Mat’s attention.

“Hi.” you say the moment you were welcomed by unsuspecting men talking by the bar. River acknowledges you by raising his drink, his gaze landing on Mat the moment yours did. 

“Hi.” Mathew mirrors you in an attempt to drown his already racing heart. A smile impending to break loose at any moment but he manages to suppress it. Instead of dealing with his adrenaline, he gestures for you to take a seat beside him. 

“Where’s the sugar daddy?” he laughs the moment you drag yourself from across the room, mocking every word he said. 

“His wife called when I got into his car.” you cringe.

“Oof. Lovely.” Mat makes the distinct expression on his face just before the two of you share a laugh.

“He’s not very smooth with adultery. He needs more practice.” you casually state sarcastically, clicking your tongue. 

As you find the narrative funny, you take a sip on Mathew’s beer. “How are you not drunk? You’ve been drinking way too much the entire night.”

“Well. I’ve got some things to think about—” he cuts himself off upon seeing your mouth ajar, “And no, you’re not allowed to ask because none of it concerns you.” 

“I wasn’t going to.” you dismiss him, excusing yourself to River which he gladly took as his cue to leave.

When he disappeared into the kitchen, you turned your gaze on your friend wearing another one of your mischievous grins, “Hey, wanna get pancakes?” 

“Y/N, it’s almost 3 AM.” Mat sighs, the tiring night starting to creep up to him. 

“So?” you question, swatting his hand away when you catch him checking on his watch. 

“Come on. Stop drinking that.” you insist and take the bottle from his hand before putting it over to the side. 

The two of you said your goodbyes to the lone bartender who was just starting to clean up again. River gives the two of you a nod of acknowledgement before landing a knowing look on Mathew. One that he’s thankful enough not to be discerned by you. 

As you walk alongside Mathew, he unconsciously places a hand on the small of your back— feeling it graze on the fabric of your coat as if to guide you towards the door in an almost romantic type of way. Perhaps, a way someone would behave if they were actually in a relationship. 

Mat notices your body tense but he doesn’t move an inch. Instead, his hand travels to the curve of your waist just as he leads you through the brass doors.

Once you’re out on the streets, he lets go.

𖥸

After almost half an hour of fighting over which diner is better to eat and get sober at, you and Mat decide to just try the new diner three blocks from your apartment. Being that it was an ungodly hour, the diner was good as closed when you got in. There were a few people inside and besides the student studying alone in the corner booth, the people lounging in the vacant seats were mostly just staff. Too bad they had to work the grave shift.

Mathew, who was rather preoccupied digging in his breakfast platter, gets interrupted when you call his attention. 

“So tell me,” you ask as you take a forkful of syrupy pancake into your mouth. Finally satisfying your cravings. You put the food modestly in the insides of your cheeks when you ask him a question, “What are you like on dates?” 

Mat disgustingly looks at you. You easily get what such a look meant and you immediately roll your eyes. You let your hand fall in mid-air amidst still holding a fork in it to prove a point. “I’m not trying to ask you out, dumbass. Don’t be so delusional.”

He puts his silverware down and wipes his mouth with a napkin. “Why the sudden interest?” 

“Just curious.” you simply say.

He hums, thinking about how he pulls off a first date. He then clears his throat as he takes you down that road. “First, I’m not bringing her to a 24/7 Diner.” you nearly gag. “She deserves a formal one just in case there won’t be a second date.” he explains. 

You sit there, nodding your head every now and then as he further goes on the details of how he’s like on a date. “Of course, I’d put my best foot forward all the time. Talk about her stuff more than mine and make sure she has a good time.” 

“Have you ever had a bad first date?” you curiously ask. To which he only answers with a stubborn look on his face, the one only Mat Barzal could pull off. “What? me? I don’t do bad first dates.”

“Oh, fuck off.” you flick his forehead as you laugh. The sound of his laughter echoing in your ears, drowning all the existing noise inside the lone diner.

But as the laughter dies down, Mat catches your eyes as soon as it falls on his. And just like that, there it was again, the exact same glint it had back in the bar. This time, illuminated by the pink shaded light lining up the wall accents of the diner. 

When he realizes that he’s been staring for too long, he settles on turning the tables on you. 

“How about you?” he props in his seat, “What are you like on dates?”

“You know, apart from the fact that you’re obviously into old men.” he snickers and you throw a curly fry on his forehead.

“Excuse me, I don’t.” you say sticking up for yourself.

Mat takes the curly fry that has fallen on his plate and proceeds to eat it. “Sure you do.” 

You roll your eyes, finding it hard to suppress the fact that you might actually do. “There’s a reason why women like old men, chico.”

He leans back and answers with a level headed and quite teasing reply, “And why’s that?”

“Because they’re men.” you look at him with a jerky grin as you continue, “And men, especially of River’s kind, definitely knows how to eat his french fry.”

Mat’s mouth falls wide in disbelief, appalled that you’ve actually found a way to pick up a stone and throw it straight to his face just to rub more salt on the fact that you had to teach a 23-year-old grown man how to eat cunt.

 “You’re an ass.” he says, rolling his eyes. You let out a laugh and shake your head. You were proud of yourself, sure; but showing just that is far too much for a boy’s already hurting ego. Who would have known humbling this man was such a task. 

“I’m playing! You know how to now.” you tell him, “Thanks to me, of course.”

He scoffs and takes a bite off his pancakes, “Cocky.”

“But you still haven’t answered my question.” he reminds you whilst he wipes off his lips with a napkin. 

“There’s not much to tell. You know I’m not high maintenance.” you tell him, ignoring the fact that you haven’t been on an actual date for so long you’re almost sure you’ve forgotten how to be in one. 

“I know it’s cheesy and corny but I do think it’s still in the littlest things, you know?” you sigh. Trying to remember the last relationship (date even) you had wherein those little things, the ones that are merely the bare minimum, were actually given to you. 

“You know, it’s not much, really. Maybe just a good talk without having to watch him watch me talk all night when he’s really thinking about how I’d look naked, you know what I mean?” you laugh it off, “I know, it’s stupid.”

The arrogant man sitting before you was silent for once, profusely wanting to wash the pool of melancholy he sees in your eyes. There must have been a shit ton of guys who overlooked how great of a woman you actually are just because they couldn’t stop thinking with the head in between their legs even just for a second. 

Mathew knows. And he hates that he’s been ‘that’ guy at some point. Probably until now considering him thinking with his balls on was the very thing that got the two of you here in the first place.

You take a deep breath, smiling. “Anyway, that’s better than almost getting with a married man. Right?”

“Right.” Mat laughs, his gray eyes bright under all the lights as he plays with his silverware,— devoid of how much he looked like as if he was utterly and undeniably in awe of not just the energy of the woman sitting in front of him alone nor the fact that she was by far the most unbelievable woman he’s known, but most importantly, he’s yet to realize how much in deep he’s beginning to be for the woman she actually were. 

Just as she is. 

𖥸

You left the diner a good hour before the sunrise and what must have been a quick five minute drive if you had only taken a cab, became a twenty minute foot race between you and Mathew.

You knew that walking was a bad idea but somehow, Mat’s charm and persuasive antics had a better hold than you thought you had on your very capable cognition. 

As you drag your feet into the confines of the elevator in your complex, you hear Mathew chuckling behind you with a firm hand securely placed on your waist supporting your balance. 

“You know— and not just ‘cause I’m an athlete, can I just say that you’re in a very bad shape?” he says almost a whisper in your ear, his voice low and deep.

You roll your eyes, leaning on the steel cold mirror once he pulls away, “You do it in heels then tell me who’s in a bad shape.” 

“Fair point.” he chuckles yet again, shying away. He presses the number for your floor before resting across from you. As Mat watches you catch your breath, he jokes in the hopes of breaking the ice between the two of you. 

“So…” he clicks his tongue, playful eyes looking at you, “Wanna tap?”

Disgusted to your very core, you let out a scoff just as you shake your head. “You’re fucking sick.” you laugh upon meeting his dumb grinning face. Seconds into laughter, Mat’s silence kills off the humor. The two of you exchange glances, the smiles on your faces receding into quietude. 

Mathew didn’t want to end the night letting you in the apartment not knowing what he’s been feeling the moment you’ve let him drag you out for an impromptu night out. And stupid as it was, the only thing he could think of was to slide his foot across the enclosed space embracing the two of you, nudging on your boot. You on the one hand were rather puzzled as to what caused such language. You send him a mental query by arching a brow. He lets his head fall back on the cold metal surrounding the elevator finally deciding to speak his truth.

 “I’m glad we get to hang out now. You know, just like friends do.” he genuinely says. 

“Me too.” you say, smiling. “I really had fun tonight. Thank you.”

As you meet his eyes, you see a glimmer of softness in his gaze. 

“Good thing I got bored, eh?” he says with a smirk. 

“Good thing I came back for you.” you reply.

A quiet smile parts from his lips.

“Yeah. I’m glad you did.”

It was a few seconds when you and Barzy parted from your respective walls to meet the sliding doors as it opened on your designated floor. You were pulling him closer by the tie of his coat whilst his hand was instinctively placed on your hips letting him press his body on you. Your faces were inches from each other’s, evident of not wanting to prolong the totally unplanned foreplay that’s about to go down in a communal lift. 

But just like every film you’ve watched your whole life, the inevitable cliché befalls the two of you when the next words that filled the enclosed walls you’re currently caged in came from the man who has yet to miss a morning jog. 

“What the hell is going on here?”

[embrassemoi]

Surrounded by the Moon and Stars ✷ 31

Pairings: Sirius B, F!Reader, Remus L  Warnings: Language, smoking weed, shitty parenting, mentions of death A/N: more of a filler but it helps establish stuff. *unbeta'd

【 Masterlist | Previous Chapter | ao3 】

Chapter 31: Drowning on Dry Land

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

The week before her flight back, Matthew’s parents invited her over for dinner.

Waiting to greet them at the door was Mrs. and Mr. Gaplin. Matthew’s father, a Half-Maj, was a Potioneer while his mother, an Old-Maj, was a Court Scribe. They wore large, kind smiles as Mrs. Gaplin pulled her into a tight, crushing hug.

After pleasantries, she and Matthew kicked off their shoes while his parents ushered them to the dining room.

“How are you darling? '' Mrs. Gaplin asked, floating plates in their direction as everyone began helping themselves to food. “Matt wouldn’t stop talking about you since we knew y’were coming.”

She side-eyed Matthew who groaned loudly. “Did not!”

“Sure thing,” she added, which caused Matthew to slump in his chair as his parents laughed at him.

It was a nice, charming evening; filled with laughter and heartfelt conversations. His parents continued to gloat about Mathew’s achievements that he hadn’t told her. It caused him to almost get up and run out of the room from embarrassment before moving to boast about Y/N. Even Mr. Gaplin asked her regarding her OWLs which pleasantly surprised her.

A few times, Mr. Gaplin pressed a few cheeky kisses to his wife’s face as Matthew made loud retching noises.

“Disgusting!”

Mr. Gaplin laughed. “Ya sixteen. Suck it up.”

“But you’re still my baby!” Mrs. Gaplin cooed, getting up to collect the plates.

Matthew tried to look insulted but she could see the small smile that threatened his lips as jealousy nipped at her toes.

The next few days were spent staying at the Gaplin household. Matthew’s parents insisted constantly that she should stay over so they could utilize the little time they had left before leaving. At first, the idea made her feel intrusive. Although, her mother hadn’t returned to the brownstone house, preferring to sleep in the on-call rooms at the Brooklyn Memorial Hospital. It quickly got lonely and boring before Y/N finally agreed. Besides, Mrs. and Mr. Gaplin were only around for breakfast and dinner - working for the day but never failed to return; always wearing larger smiles than the previous night.

They made her feel welcomed and warm - even taking her and Matthew to the local pictures. They included her in everything, even their trivia and board games after dinner.

It was quite the change compared to her family life.

Then an identical routine ensued. She would wake up, get ready for the day; spend hours with Matthew; then twilight fell as they stayed awake into the early hours of the morning.

The day before she was due to leave, she and Matthew ran up to his room after dinner. He went to lean on top of the small coffee table, rolling up a joint as she collected her possessions scattered around his room; not wanting to leave it for the last minute.

“Fancy some grass?” He asked in a poor British accent.

“Nah,” she shook her head, “But thanks love.”

Mathew’s smile turned bashful as he stood, turning on the radio in the background. She moved to open his window which was just above the roof of his shed as she stepped out with steady feet. Perching herself down on the blankets and pillows they hauled outside the night prior, she stared at the glowing city splayed in front. From the window, The Velvet Underground flowed softly.

Matthew proceeded to hop out, sauntering over as he threw a flirtatious wink.

“Brough this,” he said, tossing the camera he’d taken from her bag. She caught it as he nestled beside her and lit the joint; placed in his mouth. Billows of smoke clouded around them while she snapped a few photos of the view.

“Ya sure you gotta leave?” Matthew whined, embers of the end of the joint sparking with another huff. “Maybe you can smuggle me. Shove me into that trunk.”

She pulled the camera away from her face, inhaling the earthy, pungent scent. Her head felt a bit lightheaded from it. “A hardcore criminal at sixteen?”

Matthew was mildly amused until a troublesome look passed through his features. “Um — name something ya miss most about home.”

Home. What a funny word — place — feeling. Home was supposed to be something that made your heart glow, feel warm and happy — by that definition, a year ago home would’ve been her little house back in Toronto with the beautiful maple trees swaying in the backyard. Or home would’ve been Ilvermorny and its tall ivory walls. But now, London, or maybe just Hogwarts, had become her home. The scrolls around the Herbology greenhouse, the library, sneaking around past curfew; the Black Lake, Hogsmeade — Lily, James, Marlene, Dorcas, Remus, Regulus…

Unsure of what to say, she opted for, “You?”

Matthew rolled his eyes, bringing the joint to his lips. “Real charmer.” Then, smoke surrounded them. “But really.”

“Why?”

“C’mon! I need an answer! — I don’t know… say somethin’ like… lobstah.”

She chuckled. “Lobster? Really?”

“Or coffee from ya regular cafe.”

Deliberating it for a second, lips tugged up. “Coffee Crisp.”

He snorted. “A candy bar? Really?”

“Or Ketchup chips. Haven’t seen them in London yet.”

“That’s fucking disgusting.”

And then the silence returns but it makes Matthew shuffle in his spot. He blurted out, “Go — more brit insight.”

Y/N felt a bit hazy from the secondhand smoke. “More? You’ll get bored.”

“I won’t,” Matthew replied quickly, sounding oddly sincere. “Please, just… go on. Tell me everything.”

“Um… a friend of mine says crikey a lot. I think it just means to be mildly surprised? — They don’t say bloody or blimey as much as you’d think… Oh! Tea — they really drink that much tea. Also —”

Continuing, Matthew shut off again, going completely silent — not once speaking up or adding funny commentary; only staring at her, simply watching.

“Okay,” she turned to take the joint from his hand, “You're freaking me out. Spill, what's up?”

“S’nuthing.”

Whack!

“Jeez! Would ya stop wiv that! Gonna kill me…”

“Spill.”

“Fine! It’s just that…'' Matthew shifted, obscuring his face. Maybe if she didn’t feel so fuzzy, or if there wasn’t the smoke coming from the blunt or her small headache forming, she would’ve picked up on all the little signs. “It’s just —” he sighed, “I wanna hear ya talk — commit it to memory.”

“Obsessed with me? Not new.”

But that seemed to trouble him more. “It’s just… I don’t know if or when I’ll hear it again…” He looks up to the city in front. “Ya my… best friend. Could never forget ‘bout ya, but s’hard — keepin’ in touch.”

She pats him, encouraging and smiling. Her voice was hopeful, so much so that it made Matthew’s lip quirk up. “We’ll find each other. Always.” She said simply. “You and me, we’re like… salt and pepper. Soap and water — Hansel and Gretel!”

“Fuckin’ Dr. Seuss,” he smiled, that worried look fading away.

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

The warm summer breeze flowed around them, just as the sun peeked above the airport. Expanse, clear skies with blue mingled with deep purples and pinks shimmered against the metal from the building.

“Gonna miss ya,” Matthew muttered into the crown of her head. Her mother didn’t want him to come, but Y/N simply ignored that request as he came to send her off.

“Don’t get mushy on me now,” she joked but felt her throat become tight.

“Betta get goin’ — Doc’s lookin’ like she’s ‘bout to butcher me if ya don’t.”

She snickered, pushing Matthew’s shoulder as she picked up her bags, walking backwards while waving. “Write me!”

“Course I will! Until next time!”

“Till next time!”

Once the plane took off, awkwardness swelled among the two women. Not once had her mother said anything to her — not to apologize or see how she was doing — although they never really did talk much. Honestly, she half-expected her to leave her in New York with the Gaplins. Easy to dispose of her.

The next few days Y/N, poorly, attempted to fix her sleeping schedule. It was a miracle that she managed to get up before dinner as her head poked into the master bedroom.

She cleared her throat, feeling herself swaying in place. “Um — hi. I’m making dinner tonight.”

Her mother was dressed in a simple, yet sleek dress. She was bent over, putting on high heels as she looked up.

“The hospital is throwing a party for me — the surgery was a success.”

“That’s amazing! Er — will you be back for dinner though? It’s just that I leave soon and... two parties are better than one.”

She considered her for a long time, eyes mostly distracted by her hair slowly changing to a different colour.

“Sure. But I have to go now.”

“Right, sorry, have fun.”

Thudding down the stairs and the door clicking shut, she followed not too long after. Making her way to the kitchen, she picked up a dusty cooking book, blowing off the dust and cracked it open; flicking through the pages.

Deciding on the seemingly easy noodle dish, she rushed out of the house to the local grocery shop for ingredients. It would be the first time they would be spending any time together. It had to be perfect. But she overestimated that no matter how closely she stuck with the dishes’ instructions, the outcome was a disaster.

The noodles somehow were rock hard. The sauce she made looked grey and was chunky, similar to badly mixed concrete and it tasted horrid. At one point, even the stove exploded into flames as she had to grab her wand and use magic to extinguish the fire.

Potions... She could use a cauldron, use multiple ingredients, make some of the most complicated spells and even had tricks of her own to make the process easier but she couldn’t make a simple dish…

Her face screwed together as she glanced up to the clock; she was going to come home soon as the dinner she made was disastrous. She panicked, cleaning up everything in a rush and decided to order food.

Waiting patiently at the dinner table, her eyes fluttered up to the clock in anticipation. She felt giddy, a surge of excitement rattling throughout her bones at the prospect. Her mother wanted to spend time with her! And she should be home any minute.

But then a minute turned to two, then five, ten, twenty, thirty — then an hour ticked by.

And then another.

Y/N got up, her chair squeaking loudly. Losing all her appetite, she went to her room, sleeping in early.

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

August 20th, 1976

Going through the potential NEWT courses she could take was the highlight of her day. The possibilities were endless.

Wanting to take Defence Against the Dark Arts, Transfigurations and most of all, Potions, left her excited for the school year.

But the more she thought about the upcoming school year or potential courses, she was left to contemplate what ther5 future entailed.

Was she ready to give up magic? Something that fundamentally altered her life and moulded her into what she was? Magic was her essence, something she developed and nurtured — but to put her life in danger…

Rethinking that word again: home… Was London her home? Was she willing to leave, move again to be safer? But practicing magic around the world these days for New-Majs was dangerous. Or the potential danger she would put her mother in if she continued with it?

But magic… Maybe home wasn’t necessarily a place — but rather something she carried. In all sense, magic made her heart glow, feel warm, safe and happy — it felt like what home was supposed to feel like. And the idea of being ripped away from it, forcing herself to live a normal, Muggle life…

Magic was home.

So die, but have what she cared and loved most was by her side or live a dull life without magic — ensuring her life would be miserable.

There was a clicking of shoes in the hallway that snapped her out of her thoughts. Her mother came walking by.

Lips smushed shut into a tight line, still annoyed from the other night but was determined to spend some time with one another.

“I was planning to go to Diagon Alley for the first time — to get my textbooks... '' She stood awkwardly. “Do you want to come with me?”

“I can’t,” she replied, so quickly that it had Y/N almost scoff in disbelief. “Work. But have fun.”

She sighed but still waved her off and said a small, ‘I love you, stay safe.’ Her mother only gave her a look, something unreadable and left without a word. With a heavy heart, she grabbed her purse filled with gold and left for Diagon Alley.

Passing through the Leaky Cauldron was an adventure in itself. The shabby, tiny pub was jammed with wizards and witches zipping by.

Diagon Alley was bustling with so much magic she could feel it pumping through her blood. Students were hypnotized by the shiny new Firebolt on display; others were giggling, running around with shopping bags while older witches and wizards took a scroll. Her head turned in every direction; walking into the Apothecary, a potions ingredients and book shop.

Emmeline was there. She gave a tight-lipped smile which she returned.

Emmeline by every definition was nice, extremely kind and neither girl ever had a problem with the other. James was the problem and Y/N would gladly stay out of their feud.

Passing clamouring students, she managed to get all her supplies but stopped in front of the potion ingredients. She took a few minutes, flicking through the Advance Potions textbook and grabbed everything listed needed for most of the potions.

She made her way around Diagon Alley, going through many shops. The shelves were stacked high to the ceiling with books and materials. She spent more time than necessary there but it was beautiful.

As she was paying for her Herbology textbook, a large boom! rumbled the ground. Y/N took her bags, ready to sprint to the Leaky Cauldron but the shouts caught everyone’s attention.

“WE WILL NOT BURN WITH THEM!” A crowd of witches and wizards shouted. Their wands were transformed into microphones as a few shot fireballs up in the air.

“What’s happening?” A woman asked an old wizard. He only shook his head, grabbing a copy of the Daily Prophet, handing it to the witch.

On the front page, there were moving photos of people protesting, similar to the wizards and witches currently shouting.

‘Protests Break out in Light of Muggleborns and Halfbloods Burned Alive

Voldemort and his followers have been attacking Muggleborn and ‘blood traitor' families with the usage of fire. By burning them alive, or their houses. They bonded the witch or wizard with magic, making it impossible to apparate or leave their houses. Their broken wands were found at the scene.

Since then, protests all around Britain and Scotland have broken out. The Ministry of Magic —’

“WE WILL NOT BURN WITH THEM!” The crowd chanted.

Rage filled every inch of her body as she stomped out of Diagon Alley.

If she wanted to stay in the magical world, she had to be the greatest at whatever she did, because if she wasn’t, someone of her status was never going to get anywhere.

Magic was home, and she wasn’t going to let them take it from her. She didn’t want to surrender. They weren’t going to take that away from her.

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

Immediately after Diagonal Alley, she began working; taking in her thoughts from earlier to heart.

Making sure to cover any windows from prying eyes, Y/N fiddle with first with new charms. Still unassured by her abilities in Charms, she considered taking another class before realizing all the different routes it led to. To become a Healer, Auror or Potioneer, she needed Charms.

Multiple charms backfired, causing them to ricochet off the walls, leaving a dent or chipping the wallpaper.

After trying out more than half the Charms in the book, there was one spell in particular that she attempted to cast many times, but without fail, was never able to properly cast it. Frustrated, her hand made a sharp flick and the spell spurted out instantly.

She tried again with the same hand gesture. To her astonishment, the charm produced easily. Quickly, she jotted down the note in her book.

Next, she glossed over her Transfigurations and Defense Against the Dark Arts book until her eyes caught onto the word: werewolf.

She learned briefly about werewolves, but that was in third year. And now that she knew a werewolf, it would be good to rehash it.

A werewolf, also known as a Lycanthrope, is a non-magical or magical being who transforms under the rising of the full moon. However, non-magical beings have a greater risk of dying rather than turning.

As the name suggests, werewolves are closely related to the non-magical animal, wolves. However, they have distinct characteristics that make them easily identifiable from wolves.

She flipped the page.

Wolfsbane flowers are poisonous to the non-magical world but it has been proven to have no effects on werewolves like they do on wolves. Werewolves are immune from the poison they emit and there are reports that Wolfsbane flowers help alleviate symptoms.

She underlined that section.

It’s a uniquely magical illness known to spread by saliva and blood. Werewolves are dangerous, blood-thirsty beasts — she flipped the page.

They cannot choose to transform and will no longer retain their human mind. Given the opportunity, they would slaughter their loved ones — flipped the page.

A mixture of powdered silver and dittany applied to bites help seal bite wounds. It’s also commonly put in liquid and digested in anticipation of full moons to help with the symptoms of transforming.

Y/N’s face scrunched as she continued to read.

There is no known cure Potion used to help treat lycanthropy.

She felt oddly intrusive knowing parts about Remus’ condition. But then questions arose. How were there no Potions of any kind there to help werewolves during their transformation?

Pushing the thought away, she turned to the cauldron, picking a potion to brew. They all were fairly easy, some she’d even done before just by playing around. But one potion that grabbed her attention was Draught of Living Death. Even at Ilvermorny, that potion was notoriously difficult.

Starting up the cauldron, she grabbed hold of the sopophorous bean. However, it kept jumping when she tried to cut it. She quickly resorted to another method, running down to her kitchen and grabbing the handheld garlic press, placing the bean inside, squishing it down as so much juice spurted out, even going all over her clothing.

The potion turned into the light lilac like suggested. But then as she stirred, her potion quickly became ruined as she restarted immediately.

Hours ticked by; several items in her room were Transfigured into cauldrons, as she poured the existing solution into the nine other cauldrons as she conducted her experiment.

Stirring counterclockwise was a sham, so she stirred clockwise. Nothing, the potion went bad. The next cauldron, she stirred counterclockwise and then clockwise, alternating between every stir. It showed promising progress before it turned a bright red after the seventh stir, bubbling over.

The next cauldron, she stirred counterclockwise, then clockwise after the seventh stir as the potion turned a pink pale. That’s what the book said would happen. She quickly cleared the rest of the cauldrons, pouring in the pink liquid just in case.

She continued to stir until it became a clear liquid. Surely, that was good enough but she could never be sure. After all, she didn’t know if this was what it was supposed to look like.

Deeply immersed, she hadn’t realized how late it got.

She laid on her bed, her light on as she read the scribbles on the margins of the books she'd penned. The textbook was outdated and everything she’s written down, there were easier ways to perform spells, create Potions and more. The other books must’ve been outdated too.

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

August 22nd, 1976

Today, her attention was drawn to her Herbology textbook as she flipped right to the medicine section. Y/N had sneakily stolen a few of her mother’s medical journals as she scribbled down notes.

She flicked through the diagrams. Wizards and No-Majs were different when it came to their bodies and sickness, she knew that, but their anatomy was still the same.

An opera played in the background as she sat in front of the television. It filled the silence as her mother came from behind her, creeping her way closer to the door.

Y/N called out from where she sat. “Care to join me?”

“Can't, work.” She grunted out.

She placed the pen down, full attention drawn to her. “I only have a few days until school starts… you can’t spend some time?”

Her mom wasn’t looking at her, ostensibly staring at the floor, anywhere other than her face.

“It’s not that interesting, but um - I need help with medical terms and illnesses. You’re the best at that!”

“I can’t,” she said roughly. “Can't you see? You have to stop bothering me when I’m busy.” And then she left again, leaving her alone. Y/N would’ve been more bothered had she not been so focused on her studies.

There was a pattern.

In the Herbology textbook, in the werewolf section, there were a few ingredients used to help alleviate symptoms of Lycanthropy.

Dittany, Powered silver, Powdered Moonstone, Aconite…

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

August 26th, 1976

“Do you want to —” “Work.”

“But you always have work… can’t you take some time off?”

“You know it’s important to me. Why do you keep trying to limit that?”

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

August 29th, 1976

She was partially through her Potions and Charms textbook. It was all she could fixate on.

Deciding to take a break, Y/N went to stretch, getting up to talk to her mom who again, was getting ready to leave. She opened the honey-coloured wood draw close to the door. She pulled out a set of keys, fixing her appearance in a nearby mirror.

She had already opened the door.

“Hey mom, I was thinking of getting lunch… Will you be back soon?”

But, there was faint muffling outside the door.

“Ready for our date?”

Y/N, desperate, seized hold of her wrist, pleading. “Please, I leave in a day.”

“I'll make it up to you,” mom replied, “I promise.” And then, the door clicked shut.

Again.

She stared at the door, trying to regulate what she was thinking.

What made them worthy of her time when their’s were limited.

Robotically, Y/N turned to walk to her room, her hip bumped into the drawer which hadn’t been fully closed. Her eyes flew to it, about to push it in as she caught a flash of white.

Yanking it open, she swore her heart could’ve shattered. White envelopes filled the draw; her familiar handwriting scribbled on top of each letter. She picked one up, twisting it over to the flap.

It was unopened.

She picked up another. Unopened.

Then another. Unopened.

Unopened.

All of them were unopened, sealed. Hardly tampered with and there was hardly a wrinkle.

Was there something wrong with her? Something so disgraceful that made her so disgusting that people kept forgetting - pushing her away? Like an insidious disease.

Was she truly that unloveable? That much of a nuisance? What made someone else so much more important than her?

It was too much to process but if she had to describe the feeling, it was like drowning on dry land.

Whatever home was, it shouldn’t feel like this: cold, lonely, sad.

━━━━━━━━━༻☽༺━━━━━━━━━

【 Next Chapter 】

Slang dictionary (+ a bit of history bc i didn’t realize how many ppl didn’t actually understand what I was talking about in other chaps):

Coffee Crisp = a very popular chocolate bar sold in Canada. It was a variation of a treat made by a company from the UK. It was briefly introduced to the UK in the 60s but was pulled back because people thought it was too similar to Kit Kat. From what I know, Coffee Crisp is not commonly found in England (I've never seen it in stores) but it’s sold in Scotland.

Candy bar = US term for chocolate bar / chocolate

Grass = during the 60s - 70s, the term 'grass' was very popular slang for weed in New York bc it featured in vogue.

And yes, the British do drink that much tea.

© gotkindabored 2021. Do not repost or modify

[fruitcoops]

Have you ever seen where they get kids to ask the players tough questions and there all dress up and have fake beards and stuff. Maybe you could do that with Jules and Katie asking the team all these really hard questions?????

Thank you for giving me an excuse to spend an hour and a half watching adorable kids ask questions and melt the hearts of celebrities. You’re my hero. There are no fake beards here, but I hope you enjoy it anyway! Sweater Weather characters belong to the incredible @lumosinlove!

“These chairs are so small,” James said as he scooted closer to the table. He nearly knocked Talker over with his elbow as the four of them squeezed in; the two kids on the other side shared a look.

“Ready, everyone?” Dorcas asked. When she received six thumbs up, she turned to the camera with a cheerful smile. “Hello, Lions fans, and welcome to Lion Pride! We have a couple of very special guests today to do the introductions.”

“Hello! I’m Katie and I’m six!” She held up six fingers and all four hockey players melted a little bit.

“I’m Julian, and I’m ten.” He waved, a little shy.

Dorcas smiled. “And how are you two related to our favorite Lions?”

Katie lit up and pointed behind the camera. “That’s my dad!”

There was a chuckle in the background. “Can you tell them my name, mon chou?”

“Pascal Dumais, but everyone calls you Dumo.” She swung her legs and her tulle skirt fluffed out.

“Remus Lupin is my older brother,” Jules said with a grin. “But Finn thought he was my dad.”

“It was an honest mistake!” Finn protested around a laugh. “Cut me some slack, Little Loops!”

“Do you want to do the intros for the guys, too?” Dorcas asked. Katie tugged on Jules’ sleeve.

“Can I go first?” she whispered. When he nodded, she hopped out of her chair and ran to the other side of the table, tapping each player on the shoulder. “This is Pots, Talker, Harzy, and Sirius.”

“Aw, man, I didn’t get to do any of them,” Jules pouted.

“You can ask the first question,” Dorcas said, hiding her smile behind her clipboard. “A quick reminder for our Lions: if you refuse to answer any of these, it means you hate children. Take it away, Jules!”

“Okay.” He cleared his throat and looked across the table with a solemn expression. “How many sticks have each of you broken?”

“Oh, that’s a tough one,” James mused. “A lot, but not always on purpose.”

“I haven’t broken that many,” Talker said. “I’ve forgotten to return quite a few to the rink after games, though. I think I have about five in my trunk that I keep meaning to put back.”

“Maybe…ten? Fifteen?” Finn rested his chin on his hand. “I should start a tally board.”

“Too many,” Sirius laughed. “I need to be more careful.”

Katie wiggled in her seat as she picked up the question card. “Why do you swear so much?”

Matching expressions of shock painted all four players’ faces. “Have we sworn in front of you?” Finn asked in a small voice.

“Yeah.”

“Mon dieu, I’m the worst person on earth,” Sirius murmured as Talker leaned his forehead on the table.

James opened and closed his mouth a couple times before answering. “Uh. Well. I don’t know, Katie. Instead of answering, I’m going to take this time to personally apologize to you and your dad, who is laughing his a—his rear end off in the back, as well as promising to form better habits.”

“If you could be any superhero, who would it be?” Jules asked, seemingly unfazed by the previous question. Wordlessly, Sirius gestured to his Captain America t-shirt.

“Spiderman,” Finn said without hesitation. “He’s the coolest.”

James unzipped his jacket to reveal a Superman shirt. “We didn’t coordinate this,” he said, tilting his head toward Sirius. “But yeah, Superman’s the best.”

Talker thought for a moment. “I really like Hawkeye. Are we talking Marvel or DC here?”

“Anything.”

“Anything? Hmm. I’m going to go with the Flash, then.”

“Nice.” Jules reached over to give him a high-five.

“I got Jules’ approval, everyone else can go home.”

“What’s your greatest fear?” Katie asked, still swinging her legs.

The table went silent. Sirius turned to Dorcas. “Is this the plan? Get us rolling with fun stuff and then give the hard ones to the five-year-old in a princess dress?”

“Yeah, pretty much.”

“Cool. Well, munchkin, I don’t like bugs and I’m not a huge fan of the dark.”

“Vegetables,” Finn said sagely, which sent both kids into a fit of giggles and made all the adults break into sunny smiles. “God, you guys are cute.”

“Pomeranians freak me out,” Talker answered once they had calmed down a bit. “They have those tiny little eyes and sharp teeth.”

James shrugged. “I’m not a fan of heights.”

“I thought you wanted to be Superman?” Jules frowned. “He flies all the time.”

“I think I’d be less afraid of heights if I knew I could fly.”

“So you’re afraid of falling, not heights.”

James looked to the camera. “And now I’m getting psychoanalyzed by a ten-year-old. Uh, yeah buddy, I guess so.”

“Hmm.” Jules looked back to the question card. “Who would win in a fight, you or our moms?”

“Your moms,” Talker said immediately as the others nodded. “No contest.”

“How would we even get in that situation?” Sirius asked. “What the did we do to make the nicest women in the world that mad?”

“Stole brownies,” Katie said with great gravity for one so young. “Mom says you four are the worst about it.”

“Mom wouldn’t even have to fight you.” Jules cocked his head to the side. “I feel like she could just give you a disappointed look and that would be enough. Katie, your turn.”

“Yay!” She brightened again. “What is your favorite cereal?”

Sirius smiled. “Fruit Loops.”

“Cheerios,” Talker said. “They’re good for you physically and emotionally.”

“I’m with Talkie on this one,” James agreed.

Finn gave them all disappointed looks. “You’re so old. Mine’s Lucky Charms.”

“Okay, Leprechaun Boy,” James snorted. Finn reached over and smacked the back of his head. “Hey!”

“Do you ever play hockey at home?” Jules asked. “I feel like Sirius doesn’t have to answer this one since it’s so obvious.”

Finn laughed. “Does tapping a puck around on the carpet with brooms counts?”

“Yeah, that counts.”

“Then yeah, sometimes.”

“I have no space in my apartment to play hockey,” Talker said. “Though I plan on moving someday and then the answer will be yes.”

“I made a rink in my backyard.” James smiled slightly. “Lily likes to skate sometimes while I run drills.”

“My turn, my turn!” Katie scooted her chair closer. “Okay. Out of everyone on the team, what two people would you take with you on a dessert island?”

“Desert,” Jules corrected quietly.

“Desert island. Are there deserts on islands?”

“I think they mean like super sandy beaches with no people on them.”

“Oooooohhh.”

James mouthed a thank you to Dorcas, who gave him a thumbs-up in return. The other three looked at the kids with unbearable softness. “Well, I’d feel awful if I took your dad with me, so I think I’m going to go with Finn and maybe Kasey. We’d have a blast.”

“Nice, dude.” Finn fist-bumped him. “Unfortunately for you, my choices are going to be Leo and Logan, since I already know we could live together without starting a war on the third day.”

Sirius thought for a second. “I think Nado would actually be able to survive on a desert island, so I’ll bring him along, and for the second one…maybe Kasey? Yeah, Kasey’s cool.”

In the ensuing silence, Jules gave him a significant look. “Aren’t you forgetting someone?”

“You’re not on the t—” The realization hit him like a truck; his eyes went wide and he slumped in his seat as the others burst out laughing. “Oh no. Oh, no, no, no.”

“Your own fiancé.”

“Please don’t tell him.”

“He’s gonna laugh so hard,” Jules cackled, leaning back in his chair. Even the camera crew was losing it in the background. Dorcas had to step out of frame. “You’re never going to live it down.”

“Well, the first person I would bring with me is Remus Lupin, because he’s read a lot of books and definitely knows how to survive on a desert island,” Talker said around his snickering. “And then I’d bring Cap, because God knows that would get entertaining after Loops finds out about this. The sarcasm would be off the charts.”

“Okay, next question.” Dorcas came back into view, still grinning. “Jules, go for it.”

“Can I ask Katie’s question again so Sirius can give a better answer?” he asked gleefully. Dorcas hesitated, then shook her head. “Bummer. What was cool when you were young that isn’t cool now?”

“When?” Finn looked scandalized. “I’m 24!”

“Yeah, and?”

“Ugh. Um, maybe Furbies? People were really into Furbies when I was in high school, though I can’t say I’m sorry to see them go out of style.”

James bit his lip in thought. “Tamagotchis.”

“I loved those things!” Talker said excitedly. “My sisters and I used to go nuts with those things!”

Sirius smiled. “Lite Brites.”

Finn’s eyes went wide. “I forgot about those!”

“Regulus and I each had one and we loved them. That was the only thing we agreed on and we used to sit—” He paused for a second to laugh. “—we used to sit in the middle of the ice rink in the backyard, still in our skates and everything, and do Lite Brites for literal hours.”

“That’s so cute, oh my god.” Talker shook his head. “What a nostalgia trip.”

Katie knelt on her seat and rested her arms on the table. “Who skates faster, you or me?”

“You,” all four answered in unison.

Jules rolled his eyes, but he was clearly hiding a smile. “How many push ups can you do?”

“How many can you do?” James countered. A flash of competition lit on Jules’ face and all the guys grinned. “Uh-oh, there’s the Lupin glare.”

“How about we have a little competition?” Dorcas suggested. “See how many everyone can do in thirty seconds?”

“Absolutely,” Finn said. The four of them had a little bit of trouble getting their knees out from under the kid-sized table, but eventually they succeeded and gathered in the middle of the room. “Katie, are you joining us?”

She smiled innocently. “No, I know I’d win.”

“Get ready.” Dorcas pulled her phone out as they knelt. “On your marks, get set, go!”

The guys went easy on Jules from the outset, but they made it look like those pushups were the hardest exercise they had ever done in their lives. Talker took a second to dramatically wipe his forehead and James’ wheezing was almost comical; Jules, however, was giving it his best shot. When the timer finally went off, Finn collapsed with a groan. “I forfeit.”

“Did I win?” Jules panted, pushing his hair out of his eyes.

“You did, congratulations!” Dorcas put her timer away and winked at the camera as they headed back to the table. “Great job, everyone. Katie, your turn.”

“Do you live in a mansion?”

“I live in an apartment,” Finn said.

“Same.”

Sirius shook his head. “My house might be big, but it’s not a mansion.”

“Does a two-story house count as a mansion?” James asked. “No? Then no, I don’t.”

“Who is your least favorite person on the team and why?” Jules turned to Sirius with raised eyebrows. “Are we going to have another desert island problem?”

Sirius threw his hands in the air, speechless, as the other three cracked up. “Jules, can I adopt you?” James begged around his laughter. “Please?”

“You’ll have to fight my mom for that, I think.”

“My least favorite person on the team is James Potter,” Sirius sighed. “Not the person I’m getting married to.”

“We could get married. Lily might mind, though.”

“Full offense, but I know way too much about you to ever consider that.”

James ruffled his hair and turned back to the kids. “My least favorite person on the team is Remus Lupin, because he ran me over in practice the other day.”

Finn side-eyed him. “Didn’t you trip him after he stole the puck from you?”

“He ran me over.”

“Sure, Pots. Um, my least favorite is Kasey Winter. He threw ice at me while we were in the ice baths.”

“Logan took my Gatorade last week and hid it all over the rink,” Talker said. “I’ll never forgive him for such a crime.”

“Oh, I like this one!” Katie exclaimed as she looked at her card. “What’s the best birthday party you’ve ever had?”

“My tenth birthday was at Red Robin and I got a Power Ranger outfit.” Talker grinned. “I was the coolest kid on the block.”

“My eighteenth birthday was pretty fun,” Finn said. “There was a bouncy house and Alex almost broke it because we were jumping too hard.”

“Does it have to be my birthday?” James asked. “Because my son’s first birthday party was awesome.”

“Why?”

“He threw cake in Sirius’ face and a food fight broke out in the backyard.”

“That was a pretty great day,” Sirius agreed. “My last birthday party was my favorite.”

“You spent the night with us!” Katie said happily.

“I did, yeah,” he laughed. “And I had a really good time.”

Jules perked up when he read the next question. “I love this one! Do you have a lucky pair of underwear?”

“Yes.”

“Yeah, totally.”

“Of course I do.”

“Is there a superstition I don’t have?”

Jules looked especially pleased with those answers as Katie picked up her card. “This is the last one,” she warned. “And it’s super important and super hard. What kind of dog would you be and why? You can take your time, I don’t mind.”

“Thank you, Katie, we’ll need it,” Talker said as he desperately tried to contain his smile. “I’ll go first, if nobody minds. I would be a border collie because one, I love them; two, they have a lot of energy; and three, they love making friends.”

“That’s a good one,” she said seriously. “They’re also very soft.”

“Yes, they are.”

Once Finn managed to suppress his quiet laughter, he raised his hand. “Can I go next?” Katie nodded. “I’d be an Irish setter. They have red hair and they’re really affectionate. Plus, I met one the other day at the park and haven’t stopped thinking about him.”

“This was a tough question, Katie, but I think I’m going to go with a golden retriever,” James said after a moment. “They’re good family dogs and they like to be on the ice with those big ol’ paws.”

“That’s what I was going to say!” She beamed at him. “Sirius, you don’t have to go. I already know what you’d be.”

He raised his eyebrows, looking highly amused. “Do you now? Can everyone else know, too?”

“Well, it’s obvious,” she said. “You’d be Hattie. She looks just like you and she gives the best hugs.”

A small puff of air left Sirius’ lungs and he blinked as James reached over and patted his shoulder. “Oh. Okay.”

“That wraps us up,” Dorcas said, looking between them with a soft smile. “Any closing statements from our guest stars?”

“Ready?” Jules muttered to Katie, who nodded rapidly. “On three. One, two, three!”

“Go Lions!” they shouted in unison with matching grins. The camera crew cheered and the players applauded, all laughing.

“Thank you for tuning in, everyone! Remember to like and subscribe for more content.”

[whump-a-la-mode]

🍳 - Breakfast in bed

Idk all you characters are great.

It took me a while to decide on a scenario for this-- there’s so many good ones for a prompt as cute as this one! I eventually decided on Villainsicle, kind of a spiritual successor to the Nurse Me prompt. Some prologue caretaking for our good good boy.

Thank you so much for the ask! Sorry I haven’t been posting much these last few days, I have been stuck doing So Much Overtime. But my inbox is full of comfort prompts, so hopefully I’ll have some more cute stuff written soon!

For this ask game. 

CW//Past pet whump, dehumanization, low self esteem, speech difficulties

Villain didn’t understand beds.

For the Henchmen, that hadn’t been an immediate realization. Not quite as immediate as their confusion over plates and silverware and cups. When the drenched stranger had shown up, bedroom arrangements had been the last thing they’d thought about. They were far too busy frantically drying off their new ward and trying to get food down their throat.

After they were dry and had stopped their frenetic shaking on that first day, Henchman had laid them upon their own bed-- and they had been far too exhausted to refuse. Hell, they had been asleep before they hit the mattress.

Once Villain had recovered to the point of no longer needing constant attention, Henchmen had set up a spare room to accommodate them. With the difficulty involved in procuring a bed on such short notice, they had instead acquired a simple sleeping pad for their dependent. Villain had never seemed to use it, but that hadn’t proved to be too strange.

When they decided to continue sleeping on the floor instead of on their newly-arrived bed, however, that is when the two Henchmen took notice.

“They have to have used a bed before, right?” Henchman2 absentmindedly tore a napkin between their fingers, creating a small pile of the ripped paper. “They’re our age. There’s no way they haven’t.”

“Well, they’d never seen a cup before, either, to be fair.” Henchman nodded. “It does seem weird, though. They’re pretty clearly from Organization, like us. And our dorms had beds.”

“Shitty beds.”

“Yes, shitty beds. But still beds.”

Henchman2 nodded, arranging their pile of napkin scraps for a moment, before speaking:

“We should probably do something about it, right?”

“What do you mean?”

“If our goal is to, y’know, help them act like a person, sleeping in a bed is part of that, right?”

“I guess so. I didn’t even think about it.”

“Have you tried, like, talking to Villain about it?”

“Not really. I helped them into the bed once, and when I came back they were back on the floor.”

“Weird.”

“Yeah... But, what can we really do about it?”

“If you want to help them act like a person, you’re going to have to talk to them like a person.”

“I don’t want to scare them.”

“You’re going to make food about it, aren’t you?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m gonna make food about it.”

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ 

The sun looked different when it wasn’t shining over the water.

On the water, the bright rays never allowed themselves to be ignored. They did not simply provide light, but bright glimmering spots on the black ocean surface, rippling on splashing drops, glistening on the ship’s wake.

On land... Sun was a source of light. Subtler. Not making itself known-- only being visible in the few dew drops where scattered liquid made its way onto dry ground.

Villain still hadn’t gotten used to that. Nor had they truly gotten used to the ground itself-- the world beneath was meant to be a fluid thing, shifting and rolling with the tides. The stillness felt as odd to them as the sea once had.

In a way, they missed the sea. The glare of the dawning sun threatened to make them flinch away, but they resisted, standing in front of the window, staring out over the rolling hills outside.

Were they near the sea? They searched the horizon, but saw not its whistling white waves.

The nice people-- Henchman and Henchman2, they had names, Villain reminded themself-- kept offering them activities. Books, board games. Things that perhaps they should have been interested in. Some of them were scattered across the room’s floor, even now.

But, they couldn’t bring themself to pay mind to those things. They were far more interested in simply looking out the window. Looking for the sea. They had yet to find it, but they could not help but feel that, if they looked for long enough, they would eventually spot it.

Soon. It was getting light, now. They’d tried staring out the window all night long, but had seen not the slightest glimpse of water-reflected moonlight.

Their legs shook, and their eyelids were terribly heavy. But they wanted so desperately to find the sea.

“Villain?”

They perked up, though stayed in their position, not so much as averting their gaze. It sounded to be Henchman-- the more cautious of the nice people. The softer one. Perhaps they wanted to play another game, though Villain knew they would be far too confused by the rules and the little pieces to get anywhere.

“Villain, is it alright if I come in?”

“Come in yes okay.” They nodded. Words still felt so thick on their tongue, but they made the nice people so happy. It was more than worth it, to see the way they smiled when Villain stuttered out a few sounds.

The doorknob turned, door creaking on its hinges as Henchman walked in, backwards, hands seemingly occupied by something. Villain turned, looking back to the nice person.

“Oh-” Henchman looked up. “I didn’t think you’d be awake.”

“S’rry.”

“No, no, it’s fine. But... you look tired. Did you sleep at all?”

Henchman frowned. Villain could not help but do the same-- they had messed up. They had made the nice person sad.

“No.”

“Were you looking out the window?”

“Mhm.”

“Well... I brought something for you. And I thought maybe we could talk.”

“’kay.”

Villain looked to the item in Henchman’s hands as they sat on the bed. It had been shoved into the room a few days ago, even though they didn’t entirely understand why. There was no one here to use it.

Henchman patted the space beside them on the bed-- one of the new command signals for ‘Assido.’ Villain obeyed, sitting down beside the nice person.

“Want to talk about what?”

In response, Henchman picked up the platter they held, handing it to them. It was a plate-- they’d remembered that word yesterday. The food on it was familiar-- and it was food, if Henchman brought it, it was always food-- though the words escaped their mind’s grasp like eels. Something like bread, but with square holes, took up most of the platter, with something yellow and speckled with salt curled about the sides.

“About your bed.”

Villain blinked.

“This?” They pointed to the piece of furniture on which they sat.

“Yes.” Henchman’s brows raised in surprise. “You know about beds?”

“Yes?” It was a silly question to ask.

“Me and Henchman2 have been worried. You haven’t been sleeping on the bed. You’ve been sleeping on the floor. You can do what you want, of course, but... you don’t have to sleep on the floor.”

More confused blinking.

“No one here for sleep in bed.”

“You’re here. It’s your bed.”

What? Villain was certain they had heard right, but the words confused them nonetheless. They still struggled to make words with their own mouth, but other people’s words were easier. Fuzzy sometimes, but simple.

“I do not sleep on bed.”

“Oh. Do you not like it?”

Villain felt completely lost. They must have misheard something at some point.

“Beds for people.”

“Beds are for people?” Right. Verb. Need a verb.

They nodded. “Beds are for people.”

Henchman frowned, though the way their brow furrowed showed an emotion other than disappointment. It almost appeared as... fury.

“Villain, you are a person.”

“Asset.” They corrected.

“No.” Henchman laid a hand on their shoulder, making them shiver. “Villain, you are a person just as much as I am. Just as much as anyone else.”

“Why?”

“B-Because... Because you are? Because you’re a human being. And people sleep on beds. This is your bed, if you want it. Do you want it?”

Even just sitting on it made them comfortable enough that they felt, at any moment, about to fall into unconsciousness. The floor was fine, but...

“Yes.”

“Okay.” Henchman smiled. “How about, you have some breakfast in bed, and then get some sleep, okay?”

“Thank.”

“Of course, sweetheart.”

For a reason beyond Villain’s comprehension, Henchman leaned forward, wrapping their arms around their body and squeezing.

What was that called again? A... A...

A hug.

[kinglazrus]

Not Your Danny – Ch 1. Moving Day

Phic Phight | Next | FFN | AO3

Submitted by @ecto-american: After Danny’s untimely death, his family and friends turn to Dani for comfort. She was so much like him in every single way. And she never felt more like a clone. A replacement for the “real” thing.

Summary: Maddie and Jack learn a lot of things about their son after his death: his powers, his secret life as the local hero, the truth behind his accident three years ago. And his clone who is so much like their boy. When Dani gets the offer to join their home, she thinks it's too good to be true. And she just might be right.

Word count: 2761

Two weeks after Danny dies, Danielle moves into his bedroom. It's a lacklustre affair. Dani has no belongings to bring with her, except the few trinkets stuffed in the pockets of her shorts. She only owns one pair of clothes, two of you want to be technically and count her ghost form. But that's tenuous at best when you consider the circumstances of her creation, and that her clothes were created withher, not given to her. She doesn't like to think about that too much, though.

Neither of Danny's parents are home for the occasion. Dani doesn't blame them. Her face time with Maddie and Jack Fenton over the past three years equals an hour at most—hour and a half if she really pushes it. And most of that time was with an ectogun between them. If she counts the times where she hasn't been staring down a glowing green barrel, then it's probably only five minutes, maybe less. And that only happened a few days ago.

Suffice to say, Dani and the Fentons don't have a good relationship, or a relationship of any kind. So she doesn't blame them for being out of the house when their dead son's clone, who they only recently found out about, takes over his bedroom. Although take over might be too strong of a phrase.

Dani floats next to Jazz, hovering in front of Danny's open bedroom door.

"Is it... okay?" Jazz asks.

Dani drifts inside, turning her head from side to side as she looks around. She likes the blue walls, and the open brick on the outer wall is kind of cool. The bed, covered in a purple bead spread, topped with a fluffy pillow, looks softer than anything she's ever slept on. The room is nice, if a bit messy with Danny's stuff still inside. Posters decorate the wall, some about space, others from some band called Dumpty Humpy. The shelves are stuffed full of books and model spaceships. His dirty clothes lie next to an open hamper in the corner of the room.

The sight surprises Dani more than anything.

"What are you gonna do with his stuff?" she asks. "Do people usually just," she gestures toward the room, "leave it like this?"

"What? No." Jazz shakes her head and quickly wipe her hand across her eyes. "When someone dies, their family or friends eventually pack their stuff away. Not always right away, though."

"Two weeks isn't long enough?"

Jazz's breath hitches. "Don't– don't say that. It's inconsiderate."

Dani's cheeks go hot at Jazz's admonishing tone. "Oh. Sorry." She floats further into the room, if only to escape the awkward air settling between them.

If Dani didn't know any better, she would guess that Danny had just stepped outside for a second and would be back any moment. Lowering herself to the floor, Dani settles on the carpet and walks toward the desk. A controller of some kind sits on the desk chair, its cord tangled with a headset. Dani picks the controller up and turns it over in her hand. She only vaguely recognizes the X logo in the middle of it; her travels over the past couple of years haven't exactly involved a lot of gaming. Or any.

There was a small handheld system she picked up at a garage sale once. She carried it for a few months but lost it somewhere along the way.

Dani tosses the controller onto the chair and turns back to Jazz. "So, now what?"

"Well, if you're not comfortable with Danny's things still being in here, we can get some boxes and start packing. I think we have some in the basement. If you want." Jazz tacks on the last three words with a soft voice.

"No, it's fine."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, course." It's just stuff, after all. Dani doesn't quite get it, which also means she doesn't care. If the Fentons don't want to move Danny's stuff yet, then it can stay. He was their son before he was Dani's cousin/DNA source.

"Okay. I guess I'll just... let you get settled, then. I have to work on some plans for the memorial, but Mom and Dad should be home in a couple hours. They said they wouldn't be gone long," Jazz says.

Dani nods. A few seconds of silence pass, and once it's obvious that neither of them is going to say anything more, Jazz turns and walks down the hall. Finally alone, Dani lets her ghost form fall away. The transformation rings prickle as their bright light ghosts over her skin, and when it fades, she's left in her typical shorts and hoodie. Dani rubs her arms until the prickling fades, then flops onto the bed.

Damn. It really is the softest thing she's ever lain on. And the blankets are warm. They smell like Danny, too. That's something Dani never thought she would think. She didn't even realize Danny had a smell, but it's hard to ignore now. It's not the most tangible smell. The best word Dani can find to describe it is crisp, like a cold day. She would bet her beanie that it was because of his ice powers, an ability they had never shared.

Dani shakes her head. Everything is weird enough right now. The last thing she needs to be contemplating is how Danny used to smell. It's also, like, a super creepy line of thought, yeah? Yeah.

As she stares up at the ceiling, a blur of movement catches her eye. Her gaze jumps toward it, in the corner of the bedroom closest to the door. A small brown lump clings to the ceiling. A bug, no doubt. Dani can't tell what kind, and she doesn’t care enough to find out. It's not too surprising, considering how messy Danny's room is. There's probably some old pizza hiding under his bed or something.

Dani rolls onto her side and closes her eyes. A little bug doesn't bother her, not after the places she's slept. And if the Fentons won't be home for a while, and Jazz is busy, she might as well take advantage of her new bed and the next few hours to get some shuteye. God knows she needs it.

—

Maddie feels sorry for Vlad's receptionist. She bears a striking resemblance to Maddie herself, with short auburn hair just a touch redder than Maddie's own, a curvy frame, and a sharp, pointed chin. She's even wearing blue, bless her heart. The girl is pretty, and young, and kind. Can't be too far out of high school, and hoping a job at the mayor's office will look good on her resume. Maddie hopes it pays off. The girl deserves it for putting up with Vlad daily. Working for him seems to be taking a toll on her, judging by the distressed look in her eyes when she looks up from Vlad's appointment book.

"I'm sorry, there's no appointment for you. I don't know if I can let you in," she says.

Maddie sighs. "Mr. Masters left me a message"—or several—"asking me to come in."

"I'm really sorry, but he didn't mention expecting you... oh no." The receptionist's eyes widen and she starts digging through papers on her desk. "Did I forget to write it down again? He got so upset last time."

Maddie reaches out and touches her shoulder, stopping the frantic search. "It's all right, dear. It's not your fault."

She suspected, when Vlad left numerous messages on her cellphone rather than calling the house, that something more was up. How Vlad even got her cellphone number she doesn't want to know. She will also be changing it very soon thanks to this incident.

"He's particular about his meetings," the receptionist says. "I really can't let you in."

"Just let him know I'm here, and I'll take care of the rest."

The receptionist nods. While she goes for the phone, Maddie steps away from the desk and turns back to the waiting area. It's empty besides her and the receptionist—not surprising this early on a Monday, and all the better for Maddie. She pulls her cellphone from her purse and checks the time; It's just after eight. Dani is due at Fenton Works soon, but Maddie and Jack won't be back until noon, at least. The reminder makes her wince.

Missing half of Dani's first day at home isn't ideal, but Maddie wants to get this meeting over with as fast as possible. They had other plans in the city, anyway, made before they invited Dani into their home. Better to get everything done at once.

Maddie eyes plush waiting room armchairs, wondering if there's any point in sitting down, when the receptionist calls out, "Mrs. Fenton?"

Maddie opens her mouth to answer, but her phone—still in her hand—buzzes at that moment. Jack's name stretches across the screen. "Excuse me." She steps toward the elevators on the far side of the room and turns her back to the receptionist, the closest semblance of privacy she can get, before answering her phone. "Hey, Jack. Is your meeting done already?"

"Not even close! How goes the shopping?"

"Fine so far. I forgot we didn't ask...." She tenses, feeling the receptionist's stare at her back. "We didn't ask what she might need, so I'm just grabbing the basics. Do you want me to pick something up for you? Are you waiting on the park board?"

"About that... I'm with them now, and—what day did we settle on for the memorial, again?"

Maddie shakes her head, but not out of annoyance. Jack forgetting the day hardly surprises her. He tends to forget the little details. If anything, it makes her feel grounded. The past two weeks have been a lot, to put it lightly. A lot of changes. A lot of revelations. But she can always rely on Jack to be his usual self.

"A month from today," she says.

"Thanks, baby! You're the best! See you later." The phone beeps as Jack hangs up. Maddie sighs while the corner of her lip twitches upwards. It's the closest she's come to smiling since Danny died. She holds like that for a moment, caught between the ache choking her heart and the desire for things to get better. They won't, not for a long time. She won't fool herself into thinking otherwise. But it's nice, for a moment, to pretend things might be okay.

"Leaving Jack alone with the DPR? I feel sorry for them." Vlad's slimy voice ruins the moment after the first syllable.

Maddie tenses, clutching her phone tighter, and turns to face him. "Vlad. It's bad business to ask for a meeting, then make your guest wait."

When Vlad smiles, his whitened teeth cut a bright slash across his cheeks. It's too wide, too sharp. Never reaches his eyes. Maddie remembers, long ago, when Vlad had a soft smile. He used it sparingly, doling it out to only the most deserved. She can't imagine him smiling like that now.

"Well, I don't mean to be presumptive, but when I phone a friend hoping for a visit, I expect them to stop by my house, not my work."

"Your mistake, then."

The receptionist's typing falters. Her have yet to stray from her screen, but Maddie already knows she's listening in. Vlad probably does, too.

"Natalie!" he snaps.

The receptionist jerks upright. "Yes, sir?"

Vlad rests a hand on Maddie's back and pushes her forward. She moves, if only to step out of his reach, and heads toward his office. Vlad reaches into his suit jacket as he walks. He pulls out his wallet and pinches a few random bills, tugging them out without looking. "Take a break. I'm sure you could use a coffee to perk you up."

He leans in front of Maddie to drop the bills on Natalie's desk. The contact makes Maddie grimace, and she hurries ahead into his office. When she turns, Vlad is already closing the door. The last thing Maddie sees of the waiting room is Natalie's frown as she glances at a paper cup sitting in plain view on her desk.

"Now, Maddie." Vlad turns. Rather than heading to his desk, he steps toward Maddie and touches her arm. "How are you doing?"

"You left me seven messages just so you could ask that?" Maddie brushes Vlad's hand off. In three long strides, she cuts across his office and takes one of the visitor's chairs. While the waiting room had plush armchairs, these are made of dark wood, armless, with firm leather cushions and straight backs. A deliberate choice, no doubt.

Vlad comes up beside her, his hand on the second chair. Before he can sit, Maddie swings her purse off her shoulder and drops it on the empty cushion. Vlad pauses, glances between her and the bag, but relents and takes his seat at the desk instead.

His chair sits considerably higher than Maddie's.

"I can imagine the pain you're going through right now," he says.

Maddie's fists clench. "Can you really?"

"Believe it or not, yes, I can." He pauses, giving her a chance to respond. But whatever question he wants her to ask, whatever game he wants to play, Maddie refuses to give in. She might have put up with him once, but after what he's done, he will be lucky if she willingly suffers his presence ever again after today.

She waits for Vlad to elaborate.

"I'm sure you've wondered, all this time, where Danny went whenever he disappeared for hours. Being our city's young hero explains a lot of it, yes, but to be honest, that wasn't everything." Vlad stops to take a deep breath, closing his eyes for a brief moment. It's quite the performance. "To tell you the truth, he was often with me."

Bullshit! Maddie wants to shout, but she bites it back. Her jaw aches from how hard she clenches her teeth.

"I discovered his secret a long time ago and gave him a safe place away from home. You know, when conversation at the dinner table got to be too much." Vlad pauses again, letting his words sink in.

Maddie hates that she knows exactly what he means. All those times she and Jack discussed their inventions, their plans for when they finally captured the ghost boy. Most of what Vlad is saying might be a lie, but the truth within it cuts her deeply. "Really?"

Vlad might think himself a great actor, but he's apparently ignorant to Maddie's own deception. He nods at her questioning tone, eyes low and mouth pressed into a grim line. "I understand this is hard to hear. I did my best to make him feel safe, and we actually became close. Over the years, I came to think of him as something of a son. And his death has affected me deeply."

He stands, trailing his hand along his desk as he walks around toward Maddie. His shoulders droop, as if Danny's absence weighs on him. It really is a good performance. Peering closer, Maddie sees that he even looks pallid, and purple bags rest under his eyes. A look easily accomplished with some pale foundation and smudged eyeshadow.

"It's like a piece of me is missing without him. I'm sure you feel the same. We need each other, Maddie. To make us whole again."

Vlad reaches toward her, but she ducks away from him, slipping out of her chair. His hand falls through the empty air and he stumbles, nearly falling into the chair.

Now he's being ridiculous, Maddie thinks. She could have fallen for the makeup and the sob story if she didn't know better, but the off balance act? The distressed look in his eye when she pulls away? She's insulted that he thinks she would fall for it.

"You're right Vlad. I'm in pain. Danny is gone and it feels like he took a piece of me with him when he died. But I have my family to help me through it." She grabs her purse off the other chair and heads for the door. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have somewhere to be."

"Madeline, please—"

"Vladimir!" Her shout tears at her throat. She turns on him, blinking to fight back the burn in her eyes. He stands frozen where she left him, crumpled pathetically against her empty chair, one hand still outstretched. Maddie swallows the lump in her throat. "Enough."

She leaves without another word.

Next

[fandom-imagines-stories]

Transfer

Troy Bolton x Reader

Words: 4064

Summary: Moving schools isn’t easy. Moving to the rival school… Start of something new? Or complete disaster. 

Notes: I will stop writing for Troy when my love for him ceases… so never. (This is another one that is going to deal with bullying, even more so than the last one, so if that makes you uncomfortable, feel free to move along)

Warnings: Cyber bullying, angst

-

Nobody knew. That’s what you had to keep telling yourself. Nobody knew you or anything that had happened. Granted, that also meant you didn’t know anyone either. Strangers passed you without a second glance. This was good. If nobody noticed you, they wouldn’t attack. If you stayed invisible, you stayed safe. 

“Hey Chad, over here!” You were so busy looking at your new schedule that you didn’t see the basketball hurtling towards you. The ball hit you square in the chest, knocking the wind out of you and causing you to drop your books. “Oh gosh, I am so so so sorry.”

A boy crouched down in front of you, trying to gather up your papers before they were swept away under his classmates’ shuffling feet. 

“It’s okay,” You gasped, stilling trying to catch your breath. He helped pick up the last of your things and held out his hand to help you up. 

“I’m Troy.” He gave you a smile that would have made the entire cheer squad at West High swoon. You took his hand, feeling the blush on your cheeks. 

“Y/N.” So much for staying invisible. 

“Are you okay? That sounded like it hurt.” The apologetic puppy face was almost as cute as his smile. 

“I’ll be fine. I probably should have been paying more attention.” You laughed nervously. 

“And I should have caught the ball.” As he handed your things back to you, he caught a glimpse of your schedule. “Hey, you have Mrs. Darbus for homeroom!”

“Um, yeah, I was trying to find her room.” You anxiously tucked a hair behind your ear. 

“I can show you.” He offered, that gorgeous smile returning. “My friends and I have her too.”

“Drop something?” A blonde girl wearing the pinkest jacket you had ever seen held out Troy’s basketball. His smile strained. 

“Thanks Sharpay.” Her vicious gaze turned on you. 

“And who are you?” And here you thought all the scary girls went to West High. 

“I-uh-I’m-” You stuttered. Troy came to the rescue. 

“Look at the time! We’re all going to be late for homeroom if we don’t hurry.” He quickly ushered you away from Sharpay, helping you steer through the herd of students to Mrs. Darbus’ room. 

“Who was that?’ You whispered as seats started to fill up. 

“That was Sharpay Evans. The evil queen of East High. Just stay off her bad side and you should be fine.” He shuttered, grabbing his usual desk. All the seats around Troy were filled so you picked an empty desk in the back row. The scary blonde, along with a few other late comers got in the door just as the bell rang. 

“Troy, pass it.” One of the guys held out his hand. Troy threw him the basketball and he proceeded to spin the ball on his finger. “You ready for the game?” He grinned. 

“Are you kidding? The Knights are so going down.” Troy made a hoop with his arms and his friend tossed the ball in. The room pretended to cheer and you couldn’t help but smile at the antics. Your teacher wasn’t as amused. 

“Mr Danforth, Mr. Bolton, it seems you’ve lost your way to the court. This is a classroom. I will be seeing you two superstars-”

“In detention.” They finished grimly. 

“You must be new.” The girl next to you whispered. “She had gorgeous brown hair and a kind smile. “I know how you feel. I moved here last year. I’m Gabriella.” 

“I’m Y/N.” Your cell phone buzzed in your pocket. You opened up your messages, feeling that awful icy dread that you had tried to get away from.

“Miss Y/L/N, correct?” Mrs. Darbus stood over you, holding a bucket. 

“Y-yes.” 

“While your former school may have allowed electronics, I certainly do not.” She motioned to your phone. You slumped in your chair and dropped it into the bucket. 

“Sorry ma’am.”

“Not to worry I’m sure you’ll make plenty of new friends in detention.” She returned to the front of the room. You didn’t dare argue, burying your face in your hands with a sigh. You felt the words of the message resonate in your head. 

You can run. But you can’t hide. 

-

Detention didn’t seem so bad. You mostly just had to help paint sets for the end of the year one-act. You had your face buried behind a picket fence when a pair of blue eyes peaked at you between the boards. 

“Need some help?” Troy offered, leaning over the fence. 

“Be careful of the paint!” You exclaimed before his hands got covered. You swiped your arm across your forehead and Troy started to snicker. “What?”

“You’ve got a little…” He motioned to the spot above your eyebrow. Horrified, you scrambled to find a rag to clean off the paint. Troy laughed, but not in a mocking way. You couldn’t help but laugh with him. How long had it been since you laughed with someone? Let alone an outrageously cute guy?

“I meant to say thanks earlier, for helping me find Mrs. Darbus’ class.” You said, getting back to work on the fence. 

“It’s the least I could do after missing the ball.” He sat down next to you and grabbed a brush to help. 

You heard an outburst of laughter from across the stage and winced. You whirled your head around and saw a group of students messing around with funny looking masks from the costume trunk. You exhaled slowly to calm down. They weren’t laughing at you. 

“You okay?” Troy wondered, noticing your sudden change in demeanor. You forced a smile and said your well rehearsed line. 

“I’m fine.” 

For the first time, somebody saw through it. Troy may not have given any indication, but he could tell that something had upset you. He just nodded and smiled. 

“Are you coming to the game this weekend?” He changed the topic excitedly, hoping to distract you from whatever had made you upset. 

“I don’t know yet.” You sighed. “I have a lot to catch up on and stuff to set up.” His face fell into that adorable pout and you just couldn’t say no. “I can try and squeeze it in.” His eyes lit up. 

“Great!” Through his excitement, a slightly shy smile crept onto his lips. “I was kind of hoping that you’d want to get a pizza or something after the game?”

You tried to keep your jaw from dropping. 

“Are you… asking me out?” You gasped. He grinned. 

“Yeah. I guess I am.” His fingers brushed against yours as both reached for the paint. You blushed. 

“Then, um, yeah. I’d love to go out with you after the game.” You were smiling brighter than you had in a long time, but still, a little voice in your head was telling you this was a bad idea. Stay invisible. Stay invisible. 

“Awesome.” Troy was beaming, making that little voice of doubt disappear. “I promise, I play much better than what you saw in the hall.” You both laughed. Wow he has a nice laugh. 

Mrs. Darbus announced that the time was up and that all prisoners of detention were free to go. Honestly, you were kind bummed. With Troy helping you with the fence, you were actually having a good time. You had a skp in your step as you walked home. 

“Hi mom! Hi dad!” You greeted, snatching an apple for a snack. Your mom’s voice called from the backyard. 

“Hey! How was your first day?” She was elbows deep in tulip bulbs even though it was late January. Then again, you were in New Mexico.

“Really god, actually.” You grinned. “I met some really nice people and got invited to the basketball game this weekend.”

“Woah, what happened to laying low for a while?” She rubbed the dirt off her hands on her apron. Her usual perky cheerleader smile was gone, replaced by a glare of concern. “You know the basketball game is against West High, don’t you?”

“I-” You hadn’t thought about that. Trying to seem confident, you crossed your arms. “I can’t hide forever, mom.”

“Those girls are going to be there.” She said, putting her hands on her hips. “Wouldn’t it be better to just stay home and not drag out the skeletons in your closet?”

“They’re just cheerleaders, mom! They aren’t hitmen.” You exclaimed. You knew that this was more about protecting her pride than your own. 

“Yeah, well, you used to be one of them and look how that turned out.” the disappointed stare she gave you hurt, but you tried not to show it. 

“I'm going to the game and I'm going out for pizza afterwards with one of my new friends.”

“Is that new friend a boy?” She spat. You ignored her. 

“I’m going whether that fits your little ‘laying low’ plan or not.” You stormed off, but not before you heard her muttering under her breath. 

“Haven’t you humiliated me enough?”

-

The next day, you walked with your head down. Your mother’s pessimism had definitely brought your sunny mood back down to earth. Leave it to her to ruin the one good thing you’d had in months. Your attempts to disappear worked well for the fist two periods. Nobody even noticed that you were there. 

Of course, that only lasted until Gabriella spotted you. The bubbly brunette was quick to join you while you tried to navigate your way to your next class. 

“I heard you’re going to the basketball game!” She said excitedly. “I didn’t think I was much of a sports person, but the school spirit here makes everything exciting.” 

“Yeah, I'm not sure.” You shrugged. After all, half of your classmates from West High would be there, including the girls that started all this. Rob would be on the court, playing against Troy. Oh no.

“Well you are welcome to come with me and Taylor. We’re going to have a movie night afterwards, too.” 

“I’m- uh- I’m supposed to be grabbing dinner with Troy after the game.” You muttered, the excitement of the date having faded into dread. 

“You have a date with Troy Bolton?” A shrill voice joined the conversation, stopping you in your tracks. The terrifying blonde was giving you an icy cold stare. “That was quick.” 

“I think it's sweet.” Gabriella countered. She gave you a smirk. “Who knows? Maybe it was love at first sight.” Your eyes fell to the tiled floor. 

“I think he was just being nice.” Your grim tone made her give you a look of concern. Sharpay smiled sarcastically. 

“Well isn’t that just like our Troy?” Her sneer made her annoyance very clear. She put her hands on her hips and began a deeper interrogation. “You’re from West High, aren’t you?” Before you could even answer, she continued. “Won’t that be awkward, coming to the basketball game? Why did you transfer? It’s a little weird, right? Transferring a month into the semester?” 

“Okay!” Gabriella exclaimed. “I think it’s time we all get to class, don’t you think?” Sherpa was clearly irked by the interruption and tossed her hair over shoulder. 

“I guess I’ll just see you both at the game.” She strutted away and you exhaled the breath you had been holding. 

“Thanks.” 

“Don’t worry about her.” Gabriella shrugged. “Sharpay is usually all bark and no bite.”

“Somehow, I find that hard to believe.” You said to yourself. 

After third period, it was time for lunch. You found the same empty table that you sat at the day before. You were used to eating alone by now. 

Somewhere in the lunchroom, a phone dinged, followed by laughter. You flinched, waiting for the taunting to start. Like before, however, they weren’t really laughing at you. Keeping your head low, you tuned out the loud chatter of the cafeteria. For a while, it really felt like you were invisible. Invisible and alone. 

“Mind if I join you?” 

You looked up and found Troy giving you a sweet smile. You shrugged in reply and he took that as confirmation that something was wrong. He sat down beside you as you toyed with the green beans on your plate. 

“Gabriella told me about Sharpay. She said you seemed pretty upset.” His words only elicited another shrug. “I understand if you don’t want to talk about it, but I’m here if you do.”

“I can’t go to the game.” You blurted. 

“What? Why?”

“I just can’t, Troy.” You kept your face down, so he couldn’t see your tears. “I can’t go out with you either.”

“Y/N, if I said something wrong-”

“Can’t you see I’m doing you a favor?” You slammed your hand down on the table and you finally looked up to see his hurt expression. You almost took it back. Then your phone buzzed ominously and you grabbed your backpack. “I’m really sorry, Troy. But if they saw us together, if they thought I was happy-”

“Who are you talking about?” He was worried now. “Who’s they?”

“Forget I said anything and just… forget me.” Clutching your phone in a tight fist, you ran out of the cafeteria. 

You weren’t sure if Troy followed you or not as you sprinted down the halls of East High. You didn’t read the text until you got out to the parking lot. There weren’t any words. Just that stupid video. 

It was the cheer squad’s Christmas party. There had been some tension between you and the other girls, but you hadn’t thought much of it. ‘Girls as close as you are bicker.’ your mom had said. So you went to the party. 

Amber, the cheer captain and your supposed best friend, told you that Rob Mannington wanted to talk to you. She knew how much of a crush you had on him. Problem was, so did she. 

When you found Rob, you thought the two of you were alone. He took off your jacket and said a bunch of sweet things as he leaned in for a kiss.

“I can’t do this.” He burst out laughing, pushing you away. Other girls from the cheer squad appeared, cackling like a bunch of Prada clad hyenas. Hurt and humiliated, you ran. 

After that, it just got worse. Text messages, online harassment, and eventually, someone took a picture in the locker room and posted it all around the school. Your mother immediately had you transfer to East High. She was ashamed of you and blamed you for the loss of her social status. She didn't care that you lost everything. 

You let out a frustrated and hopeless scream and threw your phone as hard as you could against the concrete. The device broke apart and you stared at it. It wasn’t until you felt a gentle hand on your shoulder that you let yourself cry. 

You turned around and were in Troy’s embrace without objection. You let this sweet and caring boy hold you tight while you sobbed. He didn’t say anything. He didn’t have to. He was just there. 

-

“Wow.” Troy blew out a long breathing, running his fingers through his hair. “And these were your friends?”

“I thought they were.” You sighed, wiping a fallen tear off your cheek. 

After your break down at lunch, Troy told you to meet him for homeroom. He told Mrs. Darbus that you were going through some stuff and needed a friend. So he brought you to his favorite spot in the whole school; the roof. And you told him everything. It was the first time that you’d really talked about what happened with anyone and it was nice to get it off your chest. 

“I’m really sorry that happened to you.” Troy put his hand on top of yours. “And I totally understand if you don’t want to come to the game. What those West High kids did… I can’t imagine what it was like.” 

“I felt like my whole life- all the cheerleading camps, the coaching from my perfect mother, kissing up to every spoiled girl with pom poms- it all meant nothing.” You were quiet for a moment, Troy’s thumb gently rubbing the back of your hand. With a deep breath and your head held high, you made your decision. “I’m going to that game.”

“Are you sure? I don’t want you to get thrown back into everything because of me.” The concern in his voice was more than either of your parents had shown. You gave him a small, but confident smile.

“No. I’m tired of hiding from them. I’m done being invisible.” With your new confidence, you leaned over and kiss his cheek. 

Troy’s face turned a light shade of pink as he grinned. 

“What was that for?’ He wondered sheepishly. Your smile was sincere. 

“For being the first real friend I’ve had in seventeen years.” You leaned your head on his shoulder and he entwined his fingers with yours. You had only known him for two days, but he already seemed to understand you better than anybody else in your life. 

He turned slightly and pressed his lips on top of your hair, lingering there for a moment. Troy couldn’t understand his own feelings, but after less than 48 hours, you seemed to have won over the basketball captain’s heart.

-

You couldn’t hide that you were nervous. From the sounds of it, the gym was already pretty full. Even from outside the doors, you could hear the West High cheer section warming up. Gabriella gave you an encouraging smile to try and calm your nerves. 

“Remember, there is always plan B.” She said, reminding you of the message Troy had sent earlier. 

I can’t wait to see you in the stands tonight! Don’t forget you can alway sleeve if you need to. Gabriella is all set for an emergency escape. Look for #14. I’ll see you then!

You wished he was with you, but he belonged with his team. You could do this. Rob, Amber, the other cheerleaders; none of them mattered anymore. They could taunt you all they wanted, but you weren’t alone. Besides, watching the Wildcats whoop the Knights would be the perfect way to leave them all behind. 

Gabriella grabbed your hand and navigated through the crowd to get inside. The air was buzzing with excitement and you let the energy charge through you. When Amber’s eagle eyes spotted you, you just kept walking. 

After finding a good spot in the student section, you waited s the time ticked by. The gym was filling up, but you could still see Amber whispering to the other girls and pointing in your direction. You inhaled sharply and looked away, feeling the panic begin to resurface. 

“Look, there he is.” Gabriella was almost drowned out by the cheering crowd as the Wildcats ran onto the court. Sure enough, at the front of the pack of jerseys was #14. As the team warmed up, he scanned the crowd. He shot the ball into the hoop and gave you a big grin. 

Then entered the Knights. When you spotted Rob, you didn't feel those school-girl butterflies you used to get whenever you saw him. Now you were just angry. You were just a joke to him. Before you could look away, he saw you. With a smirk, he made a basket. 

Troy noticed the change in your expression and followed your gaze to the cocky player across the court. He felt a rush of defensive determination. He would make sure that the boy who broke your heart wouldn’t be making any points tonight. 

The game started off well for the Knights, with a basket and two foul throws. Their cheerleaders yelled and shook their pom-poms. You couldn’t help but feel like Amber’s sporty sneers were meant for you. 

Rob had stolen the ball and was sprinting towards the hoop. He threw it to one of his teammates, but a flash of red cut in between them. The crowd roared as Troy made it down the court for a basket. 

“Yeah Troy!” You shouted. Rob must have picked out your voice because he sent a furious glare in your direction. You just smiled. 

It was almost half time and the score was tied. Troy was guarding Rob as he dribbled down the court.  

“So Y/N’s your groupie too, huh Bolton?” He snapped. Troy tensed. 

“Just play the game, Mannington.”

“You know, I almost regretted rejecting her like that…” he smirked, “after that picture came out.” With Troy seething, he shoulder checked him out of the way and passed the ball for his teammate to score. The buzzer went off. 

“That marks halftime here folks; Wildcats 22, Knights 24.” 

East High fans breathed a collective sigh as the teams made their way into the locker rooms. 

“What’s wrong with Troy?” Gabriella wondered. You watched him storm angrily into the locker room, his whole body shaking furiously. Whatever Rob had said had set him off and a deep fear settled in your head. 

What did Rob tell him?

-

You bit your lip anxiously. If Troy made this free throw, they would tie the score again. 

“Come on Troy.” You uttered. 

He took a few deep breaths and quickly glanced up at you. He had to make this. He inhaled slowly and dedicated his focus to the hoop ahead of him. As he exhaled, he made the shot. As the ball swished in the net, the fans cheered loudly. 

Now it was the Knights’ ball and with less than a minute on the clock, it was a mad dash to stay out of overtime. Rob was going in for the shot. He planted his feet and tossed the ball. It seemed like the whole gym was holding its breath. 

The ball just bounced off of the rim and Troy snatched it out of the air, earning a chorus of cheers from the crowd. He passed the ball to Zeke who bounded to the basket and dunked the ball for the winning points. 

The buzzer was lost in the shouts from his team and from the ecstatic fans. Disappointed West High fans started to file out of the gym while East High students and families flooded the court. Troy was pulled into a crushing hug by his parents, his eyes searching the faces of people nearby. It took him awhile to find you, but he wasn’t the only one. 

“Rob told me that you found a new guy to creep on.” Amber laughed. “The captain of the basketball team? Really, Y/N, don’t you think that’s aiming a little high? You don’t really think that dreamboat Troy Bolton would be interested in someone like you?” Troy, hearing the conversation, stepped in.

“Hey are you ready to go?” He put a hand on your arm affectionately. Startled by his sudden appearance, you just nodded. “Great! I’m going to go shower and I’ll be back out soon.” He looked at Amber. “Can you believe it? This amazing girl transfers to East High and she agrees to go out with me. I must be crazy lucky or something, I know.” 

Baffled, Amber stomped off to find her posse. You just look at Troy, stunned. Was he just saying all that to get her to go away? As if he read your mind, he took your hand in his and brought it up to his lips. 

“I meant it.” He said and you got lost in his sincere eyes.”I am super lucky that you wound up at East High. That I found you.” A grin spread across his face. “And I am very excited for our date.”

“Oh, so we are officially calling it a date?” You teased. He laughed. 

“That’s what I was hoping for yeah.” You paused, your smile dropping a little. 

“Troy, what did Rob say to you just before half time?” You waited for him to say some rumor that had been spread from your school. Something awful that he would never forgive you for. Troy just smiled and shook his head. 

“Nothing important.” He thought for a moment before quickly kissing your cheek. When he stepped back, you were beaming. “I’ll be right back.”

“Okay.” He started to push through the people around you. “And Troy?”

“Yeah?” His smile could have knocked you off your feet.

“I’m lucky I found you too.” 

-

General Tag: @rae-gar-targaryen; @takemepedropascal; @childhood-imagination;  @mylovegoesto; @yellowbadgergirl; @itmejado; @suckmyapplejacks

[weirdcultstuff]

My numbness Journey:

. I am told I cried a lot as a baby. This makes sense, I was a very sick baby. I don’t remember being a baby, of course, so I don’t know if I had any emotions or not then.

. I learned as a toddler to sit still without making noise or doing anything ‘distracting’ during church services and such that lasted the better part of the day. I remember most of that feeling ‘blank.’ Like someone had pointed a remote at me and pressed pause. I remember sitting on the folding chairs at church next to my mom, and my feet didn’t even hang over the edge of the chair yet because I was so small, and I remember my arms feeling “prickly” because I hadn’t moved them in so long. It became kind of a game to sit still long enough to make my limbs prickly before I changed position in my chair. My parents were not the kind of parents who gave their babies dry Cheerios to snack on, or old spice shakers with toothpicks in them to play with during church. We sat still and we listened, or we got taken out and punished and then brought back in to sit still and listen. There was no such thing as children’s church.

. Displays of emotion and expression were often harshly punished beginning before I turned one, judging by how soon I know it started for my younger siblings. E.g. 3 hour spanking/restraining sessions for crying, social shaming for laughing (“don’t be foolish. Be sober minded.”), I never attempted dancing it was considered so out of the question, etc. I got in trouble a lot, for all the normal kid stuff like being too loud with my sisters in bed at night or arguing over a toy or not finishing my food or not obeying instructions cheerfully and right away. My parents were just picking up a lot of child training techniques from ultra conservative fundamentalist literature, and trying out what they were reading on me and my siblings.

. I sometimes felt too emotional to maintain a calm exterior during really intense moments (I equated emotions with danger) like altar calls or punishments or questionings, and learned to distract myself as hard as I could until the emotions passed. I’d count things like nails in the boards on the walls, or I’d focus on my shoes, or I’d focus on my baby siblings and make sure they had their shoes tied etc. Eventually I got really good at just kind of zoning out, I remember very often feeling like I was floating in the corner of the room, looking down at all of us kneeling and praying. I wondered a lot if I was a robot or possessed, because my body didn’t feel familiar or as real as the people around me seemed. My body usually felt stiff and mechanical, like I was watching myself move from the outside. Maybe, I thought, that’s what dying to the flesh meant. When I broke down and felt emotions it was overwhelming and I would cry, which was punished, and shamed. Because of those times, I consider(ed) myself emotional in a sort of ‘hysterical/unreliable woman’ sense.

. I got good at autopilot when I had a lot of work to do, like from 9 years old or so. I remember waking up and relishing the hour or so of feeling ‘awake’ before I’d get tired and flip the switch to autopilot so I didn’t slow down. Working hard was the best thing a kid could do, really, the safest thing and the most encouraged virtue. I remember watching people who were considered hard workers and trying to copy them, I decided the trick to picking beans fast was to never let your hands stop moving. I really like watching my hands work, and wash dishes, pick beans, type. It’s kinda comforting, reassuring, safe, yknow? I can work through almost anything, pain and tiredness and nausea and emotions. I was always surprised by burnout. I also considered myself lazy, so it’s odd that objectively I was a hard worker. But today I’m not a hard worker, all my hard work was thanks to autopilot and numbing and dissociation.

. In my early teens, I got pretty good at just not having “negative” emotions. I’d never felt anger very strongly, but I began to feel less sadness or annoyance too. If I started feeling sad, I’d just stop. Distract. Numb. Life was not easy, so I was numb pretty much all the time. It was painful. Sometimes I couldn’t even get up to work, I’d just sit on my bed, which was punished of course but I had nothing in me to react to the punishment and nothing in me to give to my work so I just sat there and took it. I had a Bible study group that read this book which told of the author’s own experience with depression and how she found happiness via a combination of Christianity and gratitude journaling. I started looking for things to be thankful for. It was like a dam broke and I could finally FEEL something again: happiness. I found joy in everything. The sky, my work, the people around me, sounds, smells, trees, colors, banana muffins. Everything was still half awful, but I just decided that part wasn’t important. Go numb for the bad, experience the good. It let me function again. It worked for a while.

. Eventually, I had ✨ a meltdown ✨ I got diagnosed with ptsd. I hit a burnout point with my mission work + school + other job + multiple deaths of close loved ones + buried trauma beginning to resurface due to my coping skills wearing thin and my new relatively safe environment and supportive school friends. Covid was the last straw. I quit EVERYTHING. Mission work, school, other job, everything. And I finally felt anger, and sadness, and regret, and shame, and so much fear.

. All that bs in therapy about “let’s name the wall you’ve put up between you and your emotions, what would it be made of? Wood? Metal? Brick? Paper?” & “it’s safe to have emotions. Practice recognizing your emotions and telling them that it’s safe to be there.” didn’t seem like bs anymore. It actually helped make sense of the storm of emotions I was having. Because I hadn’t felt anger in so long, or at least not without it being kind of ‘intellectual’ or ‘in the distance’, I didn’t really recognize it. I just felt strongly and vaguely bad. But I started untangling it all and figuring out which emotion was which and different ways to recognize them and experience them and let them have their place. Making art helped, talking about it helped.

. The storm has died down now. I still numb regularly, often automatically, without thinking about it. But I do have all the emotions now, at least to some degree, and I know how to lean into them and process them a little better. I write down my emotions from the week and how it was, where it was, why it was, every week for therapy. Sometimes I have emotions at the right times and sometimes not. Usually I can mask them pretty well if I want to. I still can’t just cry, I can’t make noise when I cry, I haven’t been able to do that since I was very small. But at least I can cry again. My goal is no longer to Not Experience ‘Negative’ Emotions, it’s to give place to every emotion that I have. Wholeness, not Happiness. I feel more grounded. I have bad days, I have consecutive bad days.

And I am happy. I never really stopped being able to find joy in things, ever since that one Bible study book about gratitude. I’m really very lucky in that, I think. I have gone and can go through life enjoying it.

[sorry-i-ship-drarry]

37. You're my home, draco

Putting their head on other's chest | For @thebusyfangirl for being extremely supportive with all the reblogging, I cannot thank you enough| angst | hurt comfort | happy ending | fluff

" well that's not my problem harry, is it ? If you can't fucking do one thing on your own that's your damn fault " draco yelled from across the kitchen at harry who was standing in the middle of the living room looking agitated

" I do things on my own. It's that you are the one who keeps thing's in the house, not me and if you're not responsible enough for it just say it " harry yelled back.

Furiously draco stomped out of the kitchen " responsible? So this is your house when it's about the house lease and paper's and suddenly when it comes to keeping thing's, it's mine. When was the last time you were responsible enough to keep things in the right place on your own? If for once you could fold your own clothes or do your own laundry or maybe just not fucking throw things anywhere you want to, so I'd pick up then maybe, Maybe for once you wouldn't have to ask me where your shit is !! It's not just my own responsibilities " draco yelled at harry face talking off the apron off his waist

" you know what you are right, I'll do my damn shit on my own Because you're fucking irresponsible with whatever you do. After all why would you understand the load of work I have to do each day, going after the bad guys.. if even for one day you'd go things I do then you'd understand where I'm coming from But if this is the way it's going to be, you do your own shit and I'll do mine "harry sneered back

" work ? You're saying as if I don't do work? I teach at least 6 classes in a day, check almost 200 copies, sit with a bunch of teachers who are much more older than me, clean the mess of the potions students make, don't you dare compare our work! Just because your work requires more strength or power or maybe responsibility, doesn't mean I don't do shit "

" draco, you're a damn teacher. I am a goddamn auror. I put my life on line everyday so I can make money for us-"

" and you're not the only man making money in this house. I earn only 200 galleons less than you do and that's not even a huge deal so stop making it seem as if you're the man of the House or that you are doing a great deal for me because let me be honest, the only thing you do for me is creating problems and fighting, that's it " draco yelled and stormed out of the house before harry could've yelled back further.

Harry groaned loudly shutting off the house and storming away himself to get away from the horrors the place held. Both of them Only returned much later after midnight at the same time and went to bed immediately without saying even a single word. And the next morning, draco left the house much more earlier than he was supposed to, leaving a note that he'd be at Hogwarts for at least a week as per the requirements by the school board to finish off with the heavy work left pending. At first harry was Happy seeing the note, thinking to himself that the house would be Empty after so Long.

But he was wrong.

At night when he came back to a messed up home, no cooked meal, he felt slightly furious and almost called out to draco but realised quickly that he wasn't home. Not dropping much thought over it, cleaned up the place, freshened up and decided to order food instead of cooking. But 4 days in, harry found himself much more tired and in desperation to just see Draco. The thing was harry knew why draco was staying an entire week at school, he knew his husband very well, he would never leave any pending work but just the realisation that draco needed a break from harry and the house, he found it saddening on a lonely night.

" so what'd he say last before he left ?" Ron asked as they chatting up about their Harry's current problems with marriage over brunch away from work for sometime

" something about him earning not significantly less than me and how I'm irresponsible and creating problems. I'm just tired Ron, lately all we do is fight. You wouldn't believe, just last week we were fighting about changing a wallpaper and you'd expect that it got resolved but it didn't. We didn't talk and that was it. It just- I don't know- like the whole marriage thing really work out for us " harry replied sadly

Ron looked at harry understandingly.." I understand you harry but I don't think he's entirely wrong-"

" so you also think I'm irresponsible-"

" Merlin, don't get your knickers in twist. All I'm saying maybe he isn't wrong. You've fought with me quite often too lately but we're friends harry, but it's different with him, he's your husband. He needs you and you can't possibly deny that you've been nice to people lately. When was the last time you bought Hermione flowers or told her she looked not a today older than she is or the last time you called Ginny about her games or take neville, when did you even call him last to see how he's doing ? The thing is Harry you've been so work involved that you've barely acknowledged the people around you. Remember 2 months after you got married and you told me marrying draco was the best thing you did, what happened to that ?"

Harry's face drew upset, knowing that Ron was in fact right. He'd been so into himself that he had barely made time for the rest of them " I don't know Ron. I just feel like maybe it's all getting out of hands. Like my plates full maybe-"

" like you need a break?"

Harry nodded.

" look Hermione and me have known you the longest and she haven't seen you in so long but she knows somethings up. We know you harry, we understand how you get when you're stressed or angry even but this, this isn't who you are. After everything you've been through and go through each day we understand you but to me you'll always be the harry potter who broke his glasses like a million times in school yet refused to buy new one's because you liked them or the harry potter who hung me by my feet or the harry potter who'd die than leave his friends " ron gave harry the most perfect smile for the situation.

Harry sighed " what am I doing wrong Ron ?"

" you've forgotten who you are and a little maybe the people around you or you're probably letting something eat you alive.. whatever it is harry, do something about it or it'll be too late to fix things" and by that harry knew he meant draco.

Harry nodded at Ron, thinking about what he'd do next to remind his husband, that he is still his lover.

When it came to Saturday night, almost a night before draco would come back, harry firmly sat back on the couch looking at the empty spot besides him with his favourite television show running in the back, yet all he could think was about the memories with draco, the times he made him laugh and now harry didn't even remember in the last one year they've been married the last time harry made his husband laugh. Harry switched off the tv, sighing, getting up from the couch and going into the storage room. He cleared the dust, blowing some away, then turning on a little lamp around the corner. Following his instincts, harry went deeper into the pit of storage and found his things back from the school days. Falling into nostalgia, harry took his school thing's, a few things after that and album's he had gotten made and went back to living room and set everything on the ground.

Memories probably never leave you yet sometimes you need to be reminded of who you are to become who you want to be and that's exactly what harry was doing, figuring out when he became the person he is Today. He went through things after things he had from school, his defense against dark arts books, the model of something science related he made for muggle studies and the albums. Pictures after pictures with people he loved, he found himself drowning into it. It had been so long since the last time he contacted any of them and it saddened him. This isn't who he is, yet somehow this is exactly who he is. As sadness started to fill into his lungs, he finally opened the last box he had retrieve and opened it to find things related to draco. They started going out late in 8 th year and going through a lot of post-war things, Harry had maintained a diary in a muggle way to vent out but most of the end of the diary was filled with how draco looked so good under the moon or how draco was mindlessly biting the top of pencils or biting his lip during class or how his dates went.

Without glancing up harry said " don't leave me "

" how did you know I came ? " Draco asked as he stepped into the living room and sat down next to harry

" you're my soulmate draco, I can sense whenever you're around me "

" you can ?" Draco frowned, not believing harry could still do it.

" just because I've became this huge asshole doesn't mean I've stopped loving you draco "

" it doesn't hurt to remind every once in a while "

Harry looked up finally to see an upset draco sitting next to him with a sad smile " I do tell you I love you "

" when was the last time you said that to me?" Draco asked smiling lightly

Harry frowned lightly, confused but immediately realised he hadn't spoken the words out in almost 5 months " fuck- I'm sorry- shit"

" yeah " draco signed looking down at the things harry was going through " what's all this ?"

" this- school stuff. And this is a box specifically about you " harry pushed the box a little box towards draco

" I own an entire separate box ?" Draco chuckled

" you own an entire different separate place in my life too and I think me becoming an asshole forgot that " harry replied sadly. Draco looked at harry sympathetically before pulling him forward towards him and wrapping his arms around Harry's torso..

" that's all I wanted to hear " draco's voice broke. Harry leaned in further, his head pressed against draco's chest, small tears escaping his eyes and wetting draco's shirt.

" I'm sorry. I never meant to be this problematic and with the whole fighting things. I'm so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you but I just, I'm such an asshole" harry rambled

" you're not an asshole harry. Hey look at me- you are a brilliant man who sometimes needs a break. I haven't been less of an ass to you myself but everyone have a rough patch in marriage and we will get past this too. We're special harry, remember. We're Always special " draco smiled holding Harry's face in his hands

" I don't want to be this person. I just want to be yours and I don't want to fight you, I don't want to yell at you or you to yell at me and i don't want you ever leaving me alone.. I can't- I don't want to be without you draco, I don't know how to be. I've been so selfish that forgot to tell you how much I love you for 5 months, I don't ever want that again. I want to tell you everyday how much I love you. I don't want all these fights, I hate it without you. It doesn't feel like home without you draco, you're my home and with you gone, nothing makes sense, not even me " harry sobbed.

Draco eyes welled up with tears " I don't want all this too harry. I want to be entirely yours and yours forever. I Always Want you to be my home. Fuck I love you- I've missed you so much "

" I missed you too. I love you draco, I love you so so so much, I love you "

" I know you do " draco smiled. He softly kissed the top of Harry's head, then his cheeks, his eyes, his forehead and finally his lips.

" don't ever leave me, ever "

" never " Draco sobbed, their foreheads touching each other, taking in deep breaths with tears running down their faces like a small river.

It was sometime later when they started going through Harry's thing's together with harry cuddled into draco.

" what's this ?" Draco asked as he picked out a small dry petal

" oh, this was from the restaurant I proposed in "

" and this ?"

" this is- I think the handkerchief you left the night we first kissed "

" oh, nice, what this ?"

" I think that's the note I wrote to you to ask you out for first date but never sent it "

" real smooth harry " draco chuckled. Harry rolled his eyes, playfully hitting draco over his chest before picking up and showing him thing's again.

" you still have that paper boat from our first date ?" Draco asked softly gazing at harry

" well- I still think it's the most perfect boat ever made " harry smiled at draco before pressing a small kiss over his lip.

It was harry who Always imagined that, that perfect little boat was the reasons for everything they have right now, but draco never needed to know that, after all he was his special man and he made him the happiest man in the whole world even if sometimes the boat drowned a bit..

Requests open

Day 36- angel | Day 38- set it up, break it up

[the-fiction-witch]

A kid.

TV SHOW THE QUEENS GAMBIT

COUPLE BENNY WATTS X READER

RATING FLIRTY

Well that's all over and done with, time to get myself a cola. I headed off from the set up area with all the boards over to the small bar area in the hotel

"Hey, one cola please" I told him and he nodded getting one out the little fridge behind the bar I paid him and took the glass bottle having a nice sip, it was ice cold and refreshing. I finished up my bottle and left it on the bar before fixing my jacket and heading back into the hotel to the board it should be updated by now, and I'm going to be playing...

Arthur something or other I couldn't read the writing of whoever had done it, table sixteen.

So I headed over to the table expecting the usual some stuck up guy inna suit with greased back hair and a pocket protector for his pencil but as I got to the table I was... Admitedly surprised.

It was a kid.

About four if I had to guess, in little polished shoes, some black little kids suit pants a white button down and a black vest jumper over it, but he looked strange to me, he had a mop of blonde and brown hair and dark brown eyes.

"Hey you holding the seat or something kid?" I asked checking this was infact table sixteen

"Mr Watts I presume" he says getting up and standing on the peice of wood across the two chair legs to be higher offering his hand to me I shook it and sat down across from him still very confused

"So your arthur?"

"Yes, and your Benny" he says fixing his peices

"How old are you?" I asked him

"Five. Why?"

"Hu..."

"What?"

"Nothing, nothing, impressive being at this level at your age. I was ambitious at that age too"

"White moves first" he reminds me as he clicked the clock on I did a classic opening and clicked the clock back "I've heard alot about you" he says as he plaid on

"Have you know? Always wise to check up on a champion" I told him

"All bad" he says

"Was it now?" I laughed "who taught you if you don't mind my asking?"

"My mum"

"Your mum... Tell you about me?"

"Umm. She does not have a high opinion of you" he says "says you play like a defensive hack and dress like a cowboy"

"... I like your mother" I laughed I focused on the game I thought I could go easy on this kid but he was smart, tactful, intellectual, much like I was at his age, in fact the more I sat and looked at him the more it felt like... Looking in a mirror somewhat I saw so much of myself in him, he was just as I was in that age. He even kinda looked like I did at that age, "check" I told him he sighed and load his king down "good game," I told him offering my hand and he happily shook it "you uhh your good kid. I'm sure I will get to play you again, maybe I won't be so lucky that time" I told him making him smile

"Thank you Mr Watts"

"Your welcome," I smiled "ohh Arthur what exactly the boards unreadable"

"Arthur y/l/n"

"Hu... Y/l/n? Why does that sound so familiar?" I said more to myself "where's your mum anyway?"

"I'm not sure she went to get coffee" he says

"What's your mum's name?" I asked him still unable to get that thought out my head where have I heard that name before

"Y/n. Y/n y/l/n" another voice spoke up a voice I could have bet my life I knew

"Mummy!" He smiled jumping off the table and into her arms hugging her leg, I turned and saw her... Y/n y/l/n. A girl I met years ago she was trying to make it into the more professional chess circuit out of the things like the small state tournaments to more of the southern championship and beyond but I mentored her for a while and... We ended up getting close, she was... Just as I had remembered her, in her classic black heels, her black stockings, her little white dress with a black cargiden over it, her hair in those perfect curls I remembered, she looked... Good. I mean she always did but fuck she looked good, or maybe I'm just distracted by the fact her tits have grown like three sizes bigger. I was gobsmaked to see her I haven't seen her in years she gave arthur a cuddle Patting his hair "how'd you do kiddo?"

"I lost"

"Hey, no worries, once we finish up I'll get you some ice cream okay?"

"Okay" he smiled

"Go get your things then" she told him so he came back to the table to gather his paper and pencil and such "hi Benny"

".... Hi." I said with a gulp getting up going over and giving her hand a kiss "you... You look amazing, how are you I haven't seen you in years?"

"Doing okay, been busy with this little guy" she laughed

"I can imagine so, you have taught him well"

"Well, I had a good teacher" she smiled playing with my chains in that playful way she always would

"Humm hell yeah you did" I smirked as she rested her hands on my chest "surprised I had the time to reach you anything" I smirked wrapping my own around her to sit on her hips, fuck her ass is bigger too "you look amazing."

"Didn't I always?"

"You did but... You've improved with age my little flower, like a fine wine" I smirked "fuck have I missed you" I growled in her ear but then I remembered, as I caught Arthur out the corner of my eye stood with his stuff starting at us oh right... The kid.

"What's going on?" He asked

"Nothing kiddo, mummy and Mr Watts know each other" she smiled "don't we?"

"Uhhh yeah, yes I uhh do in fact know your mother, I uh I thought I did" I stuttered

"How do you know my mummy?"

"Ughhhhhh, your mother and I... Used to uhhh" I stuttered unsure what to say, the kids five I can't exactly tell him 'oh hey yeah sorry kid I used to bang your mother and she still looks hot so you mind fucking off while I see if she'll still let me hit that?'

"We used to play together, didn't we Benny?"

"Yes, we used to play together" I nodded "we just haven't seen each other in ... Roughly five and half... Years." I said as it all sort of clicked. "Oh my god"

"Yeah there we go" she giggled "kiddo, get mummy a ice water and get yourself something nice" she smiled handing him a few dollars from her purse he nodded and ran off all while my brain was trying to process this "so..."

"So... That's why you up and left?"

"Yep"

"Okay. You left because you were pregnant. I got you pregnant. That is my kid. Why am I just now hearing about this!"

"How so?"

"Hes five! Why am I just now getting news that I have a fucking kid?" I asked her "why did you not tell me? Phone? Letter? Telegram? Come to my apartment I literally haven't even moved!"

"I was under the impression you didn't want anything to do with me anymore"

"Anything to- y/n. Of course I did whatever made you think I didn't?"

"The fact you ran off to moscow with clio and didn't even tell me?"

"It was last minute, and I knew you couldn't because you didn't have a passport, ... I was heartbroken when I came back and you weren't there."

"I figured you where done with me, moved on to the next girl"

"Even if you did think that, and even if I was why wouldn't you tell me you where pregnant?"

"I didn't find out till months later, I knew the rut you where in after moscow so... I didn't want to bring it up, so I just made it on my own," she says "I've missed you benny"

"I've missed you more" I told her giving her cheek a kiss

"He loves chess, took to it as a baby, he liked pushing the peices around, he makes me read him chess books at night"

"Does he know? That I'm his dad?"

"No, not like he needs to"

"Y/n, have you... Got married?"

"No, still single, not dates anyone since our... Playing together" she laughed

"Then, if you'll let me, I'd love to take you out to dinner tonight. Both of you." I told her and her face lit up "he's my kid y/n, I wanna be a part of his life, and... Yours if you'll let me"

"I love to" she smiled hugging me tightly nuzzling into my neck

"I really have missed you y/n, I meant every word of it, and... You do really look good" I laughed

"Thank you, so do you" she giggled "you have another game to get to benny"

"Oh right, yeah. I will see you later then" I told her

"See you later" she smiled I went to go and see the board to see where I had to be next but she held my hand and brought me back to her giving my lips a gentle kiss I happily kissed back fuck her lipstick even tastes the same "lucky kiss" she giggled

"Thank you," I told her giving her a kiss too "see you later my little flower"