#there’s people who have it worse with this disorder

[tismtron]

Can you drop some general dating eltingville club member hcs? It doesn’t matter who i genuinely just crave more fanfiction content of any of them

Absolutely I love these ugly loser boys

The Eltingville Club Headcanons

Pete Dinunzio

•Pete is the shortest of the club at 5’7, but the one who grounds everyone else with common sense, Although he is very impulsive himself.

•He was raised mainly by his father and had multiple siblings in his house. Though his father doesn’t support his horror movies or in his words “nerd shit.”

•mainly joined the club cause they are weirder than he is but supports his hobbies and interests so it give him some solace.

•Canonically into horror porn and cannibal flicks. I think he has paraphilia. He thinks cannibalism is very intimate, eating someone so they’re apart of you and all the time and dedication it takes to eat the entire body intrigues him.

•goes broke every Halloween cause he’s buying shit for either his collection or for his room. I like to think his birthday is in October.

•Has anger issues but not to the degree as bill or Josh do,and that comforts him in some way. Makes him feel better about himself. (He’d never tell them that.)

•wants to be covered in tattoos when he’s older, but in reality he’d probably just get five or six on his arms.

•tried to smoke cigarettes but his dad caught him and made him smoke the whole pack.

•his father and siblings harass him the way that some households do when one them picks up a neither hobby and bullies them cause it’s weird.

•very sweet if he likes you. Will show affection in his own way like asking you to watch horror flicks or info dumping about his favorite slashers or the new dvd set he bought.

Jerry Stokes

•Jerry is the voice of reason that no one listens to. He lives with his mother and father as an only child.

•I like to believe his parents are conservative or religious and don’t like when his fantasy interests because they think it’s immoral or something.

•(taking this headcanon from Tahawkydingo on ao3) his parents found his porn stash of fantasy cosplay pinups and they sent him to gay conversion camp.

•Is autistic but his parents deny that he is. vocally stims with his bidibidi bit and hyper fixates on fantasy. Wants to go to a renaissance fair so bad but no one wants to go with him.

• his parents treat him differently after his parents came to terms with him having autism and they unintentionally belittle him, he stays with the club because they don’t baby him like his parents do.

•has watched every fantasy movie from the eighties at least four times.

•avid weezer listener

Bill Dicky

•snarky fuck. Will always try to get the last say in an argument and gets very butt hurt if he doesn’t.

• He lives with his mom and younger sister. His mom has full custody of him so he never sees his father.

•one thing I saw is that Bill is usually the one to throw the first punch besides Josh. I theorize that his dad used to get physical with him and it hasn’t really clicked with him that he was abused and think it’s normal.

•male manipulator by the book definition of antisocial personality disorder in the comics, average smiths listener in the pilot.

• tried to work at gamestop or Blockbuster but either got denied for having expired dvd returns or stole.

Josh levvy

•lives with his mother and father. I think of him as the youngest sibling if he ever had any brothers or sisters.

•His parents are Jewish and if he showered more he’d have natural curls. Without his glasses he can only see blobs of color, his vision is getting worse.

•it’s cannon that he only eats things that have collectibles in them and hates doing it. But I think he’s always been insecure of his body for a long time and is at the point where he doesn’t care what people see him like some tub of lard because his self esteem is low.

•secretly feels that he’d never measure up to the expectations his parents give him so he doubles down.

•His dad used to get physical with him as a kid as a punishment, like belting or smacking him up side the head if he says something wrong. So he got more aggressive when someone made him upside or says something he doesn’t like.

•collects not even for fun, just to have. Because it’s become such a big part of himself he doesn’t know what to do if he stops.

[marshemillow]

You know what? I'm talking about "phone addiction" again because I'm not done.

Do you know what an addiction is? Addiction isn't "you do it just out of habit because you don't think about it" addiction is "if you stop you will literally be in agony and that's why you keep turning to the thing."

We have this baked-in idea that addiction is a moral failing, that if you have a phone addiction, it really just means you need to get off your phone. Yeah, addicted to alcohol? Just stop! Don't drink it anymore! Withdrawl? What's that? If you drink alcohol, it obviously means you just don't have enough willpower! If you can't stop drinking alcohol, it means you're a bad person. You basically deserve to have liver failure at that point!

Yes some people actually believe this! They don't know that paramedics carry alcohol with them specifically because it saves the lives of people going through alcohol withdrawl, they don't care! It's something they cheer themselves up with because they aren't addicted to alcohol, and that means they're a good person.

I am so sick and fucking tired of people pathologizing and moralizing non-moral issues. Addiction, or Substance Abuse Disorder, is an actual physical health condition. It's a disease. You can't stop it with enough willpower, it's something that needs actual medical treatment. Just looking at coping mechanisms or even just things that make you feel good because they release dopamine in your brain and calling that an "addiction" does so much damage to people's understanding of real addiction and makes addicts look like evil weak cowards instead of people with a disease that needs treatment. That's fucking evil. Imagine telling someone with cancer that they just didn't have enough willpower to stop it. Disgusting.

And it's extra ironic coming from these people who think they're addicted to their phone saying "you just need to stop" and then not stopping, meanwhile I have often just forgotten I don't have my phone with me and then get confused when I don't have it. Shouldn't it be the other way around? Why is the person who "knows" it's an "addiction" (in the moral failing way) still not have enough willpower to stop whereas I have to consciously remind myself to go find my phone because I just forget it exists when I don't believe in phone addiction? Literally half the time I take my phone out of my pocket, it's just to check the time.

It's almost like "phone addiction" is just another way to make people feel guilty for doing things they like doing. It doesn't make them stop, they just feel worse about it. They don't think about it as a coping strategy that fades as their life circumstances get better.

And every single time, when you find these people who feel bad for doing things that make them happy, they grew up christian. Every fucking time. "Struggle with addiction" and it's just guilt applied to something normal.

STOP MAKING YOUR CATHOLIC GUILT EVERYONE ELSE'S PROBLEM!!! IF YOU CARED ABOUT "PHONE ADDICTION" YOU WOULD BE TAKING ACTUAL STEPS TO MINIMIZE HARM, NOT THROWING GUILT AT PEOPLE JUST FOR ITS OWN SAKE!!!

[lexytoga]

Headcanons for Loki :

 They don't really smoke, just think it's gross and weird for humans to do

Loki prefers wine than beer, he likes sweeter drinks in general

Loki really can't sleep half the time  cause of the darkness most of the time he doesn't sleep (mobius might have gotten them a light lamp)

  Loki half the time goes to buy outfits from thrift stores he would go to places like Gucci but I feel like he would be offended by the prices 

Loki braids his hair hair before he sleeps mainly to get natural waves 

Loki likes candies a lot, mainly the sour and sweet ones but he didn't like the key lime pie and mostly ate the frosting until mobius gave him a pumpkin pie which Loki loved 

He wears eyeliner and carries eyeliner to fix it

Loki's Jontun form has gloves on cause he can't touch people since he would burn them

Loki mainly crafts his own weapon and powers them with his magic (like a poison knife)

Loki listens to Lana del Rey and sometimes Taylor Swift mainly cause he likes the sad and romantic vibes of it 

Loki weighs like a Frost giant even in his Asgardian form even though he is small the illusion doesn't change his weight (from what I know he is like 500 pounds) so mobius really has a hard time dragging Loki away

On a sunny day, Loki really has sun allergies but it's very light but worse in his jotunn form, it's one of his weaknesses, that the burns really don't heal that fast 

Loki has every birthday gift he was given because it is the only time he feels loved in a way, especially by Thor who would just get Loki a plushie

Speaking of plushies Loki has a bit of separation anxiety, it is not that bad but he does panic when someone he loves doesn't text back, like when mobius goes somewhere unannounced, as kids Thor and Loki would share a room cause of it, sometimes thor had to hold Loki when he sleeps, as an adult thor taught plushies would remind him that he is always with Loki

Loki's grave (the Infinity War Loki) would be visited by Thor every day, he would clean it and put plushies and flowers on the grave

Loki has a lot of pets some of them are Thori (a hellhound from Hel) Ikol (a nod to comic, and a magpie) a snake, and a cat named Clementine 

(This is more like a modern Loki au) Loki would have used his magic to make himself an apartment to stay on earth, Loki would come home to Clementine and hang out with her when he gets home

not really a headcanon but he does have all-speak, speaking all languages (again in the comics)

Loki sometimes wears high heels, but he would conjure shoes if they got uncomfortable

Loki sometimes bakes pies since he really isn't good at cooking, but he learned to bake a pie for mobius so he didn't have to eat from the TVA

Loki would conjiur a blanket on mobius when he would overwork and fall asleep on his desk

Mobius doesn't know how to fight so Loki uses his magic to protect mobius and help him heal

Loki has BPD (borderline personality disorder) but mobius tries to help him and calm him down when he gets angry

Loki usually scoops mobius up and hugs him random moments taking advantage of there height difference

Mobius would give Loki candy or a star after they complete a mission to encourage Loki to be more less violent

Loki doesn't curse at all but he uses more older words like quim and all or he would just mumble in asgardain, he has a habit of going back to old English using "thy" "aye"

Both Loki and mobius love language is touch and glares, Loki would telepathically talk to mobius when they are around people

Mobius loves how Loki would explain in a Shakespeare

As a kid Loki mainly pranked thor to cope with his insecurity, he still does but it was getting better with mobius comforting him

Mobius sometimes feels like he is lesser to loki and thinks he isn't good enough since Loki was a god

Loki would visit a variant of frigga who ofc knew it wasn't her Loki but yet treated him like no other

When frigga met mobius she was noting but happy and knew Loki was happy with mobius and other way around, she was glad her son found some he can be real with

Mobius always treated him equal to everyone and sees him as a lover and a friend, and never used the god title unless Loki wasn't sure of a mission being successful

(please note my version of loki is like a combo of MCU loki and comic loki! Most of these are not cannon in the MCU but it might in comics! and I keep using he/they prounce cause i am confused as hell-)

[varicspidey]

tw mentions of ed, kind of a rant/serious talk

hey guys i know a lot of people on this side of tumblr want a partner who also has an ed so you can keep yourself accountable and shit but let me tell you the reality; it fucking sucks. you love each other so you WANT each other to recover, not help each other get worse. it's a constant battle of "please eat" and "i'll only eat if you eat" and "you always want me to eat but you never do" "how can you say i deserve to eat but you dont" etc etc. when you actually care for someone, you don't want them to have an ed.

so please stop saying you want it unless you have experienced it cuz it feels like shit. also because you get so so scared that by venting about it, you're triggering them deeper into their ed and it fucking sucks to wanna tell them everything but you can't out of fear of them and their safety and mental health and shit.

it is horrible. also because this isn't a disorder you'd want someone you love to have. it isn't a pretty disorder and while here on this side of tumblr we wanna talk about being all bones and shit and yeah i feel like that too but seeing that happen to a loved one can fucking hurt you as well as hurt them because they are struggling. it isn't cute. please don't glamorize it. especially if you've experienced it because then you KNOW how it feels. you can say whatever you want for yourself but please don't encourage others to seek a partner who has an ed so you can keep yourself accountable and shit because that isn't the truth of it.

[magnetothemagnificent]

Non-ADHD and non-autistic disabled people whose only idea of ADHD and autistic people is shaped by media depictions of a nerdy white boy or a quirky goth girl with low support needs: "Yeah ADHD and autism are destigmatized and we should ignore people with ADHD and autism in favor of real disabilities. I am very smart and progressive."

Lateral prejudice towards other disabled people will get us nowhere.

[foursidecity]

Thinking about them... designs... silly..

[awetistic-things]

awetistic things {951}

having extra painful periods

[a-blip-of-billdip]

this isnt what i usually post on this blog but I'm already sick of all the memes and 'jokes'. I am almost certainly leaving the fandom for good now because of the book of bills release and NO it is not because billford's community has an influx of supporters.

So the worship and romanticization of asylums and other abusive practices for mental health have been steadily gaining traction in recent years, especially with the rise of tiktok's toxicity.

SO many people, especially younger people, regularly talk about how they want lobotomies or how women they don't like should be lobotomized. They get tattoos of lobotomy like it's some quirky fun thing and not one of the most horrific tortures someone can endure.

These same people, ESPECIALLY leftists, will look at anyone they disagree with or don't like and say "get institutionalized, loser" or "et therapy" and it's always in a mocking way. it's always in a policing way.

because these people know that mental wards strip everyone of their freedom and their bodily autonomy. they know these places arent for healing--theyre for silencing.

So the amount of people i see treating bill being institutionalized like a good thing---even the writers and alex himself?

Yeah. Im out ✌🏼

[wheelchairtetris]

I need to stop watching medical dramas. It hurts to see doctors trying everything they can to figure out someone's symptoms when that really doesn't happen in the real world.

[blue-thief]

wrong diagnosis motherfucker

[wavesoutbeingtossed]

.

[notjanine]

me a week ago: i love my job!!

me now, after having a mid-year review that amounted to you’re doing an excellent job and you bring such a valuable perspective to our practice but i don’t have the ability to give you a raise right now but don’t worry bc i just hired a new CFO to try to figure out money so we can maybe give you a raise later this year: *breaks into a cold sweat as i crack open indeed dot com*

[wolfisland]

honestly one of my least favourite things about online spaces centered around cluster b personality disorders is that they almost treat the disorders as an in joke. like its never quite anti recovery rhetoric but a lot of the times it feels like it becomes this thing where something harmful gets spurred on as a personality trait to nurture rather than a symptom to keep an eye on. freaks me the fuck out.

it could be because growing up i was pretty familiar with cluster b spaces and i lost a couple of friendships due to it becoming this whole "i have this disorder now i have to knowingly indulge the more harmful and dangerous symptoms im supposed to be treating to really prove i have this disorder!" thing.

like babes i still believe youre borderline, you dont need to go full tilt maintaining a numbered and ranked list of the people most important to you and assigning a fp role to someone who frankly is not responsible for your stability.

[trans-axolotl]

hi, i wanted to ask if possible (I'm sorry if this is a little invasive!) but what treatment program did you go to? I'm looking for some and I'm receiving mixed singles right now..

hey! I'm comfortable talking about it. I'm assuming you're talking about the eating disorder treatment program I went to, not the other psych wards I've been to, but let me know if you meant something else.

I went to the Eating Recovery Center in Washington. i have a lot of mixed feelings on it. i really hate the entire structure of residential treatment and think that it is inherently carceral and coercive. ERCWA was a really restrictive treatment program, we were on a locked ward in a medical center, there were a lot of shitty + abusive staff, and there was just so much bullshit the entire time, like having no privacy in the bathroom, no doors on the bedrooms, barely being able to go outside, having so much of what we said and did monitored, the fucked up ways they used NG tubes, a really ableist psychiatrist, etc. treatment was pretty standard CBT, DBT, ACT, RODBT, random "skills groups" that felt like a waste of time with a lot of therapists and interns who had no previous therapy experience. I got medically stabilized through that program and was able to achieve pretty sustainable changes in my disorderly eating, but i really credit that more to the peer support then to any of the actual "treatment."

But compared to some other programs i don't think it was the worst. You can have your phone all day which was a huge benefit to me, since most programs take your phone. while i was there they had a dietitian who accommodated custom ARFID menus--she doesn't work there anymore, but they probably still do ARFID menus. they had multiple trans staff members and let me stay on hormones. they also don't kick you out for self harming and can handle a higher level of medical complications. ERCWA is run slightly different then some of the other ERC locations though, and I've heard a lot worse stories about other ERC locations. this info is all only true for adult wards as well--i would not recommend ERC for teens. i don't really know if i would recommend ERCWA at all to people but i think there is some things that made it more tolerable then some other treatment centers, and that if you have some specific needs, it might be one of the only treatment centers that can accommodate some things.

sorry, i feel like this isn't a super helpful answer, but i just have so much anger towards residential treatment and have a hard time recommending any places, even though i don't think ERCWA is the worst option.

if you have any more questions I'm happy to answer--i can also post old photos and videos that show my room, schedule, etc. i also have a lot of friends at a variety of different treatment centers and can answer questions about some other centers if you have any.

sending you the best of luck anon, I hope you're able to find the support and care that you need <3

[commandermahariel]

siiiiiiigh

[buysomecheese]

I forget how simply I can fall into addictive habits and I forget how many things this can be applied to. I forget how much physical contact is compared to a drug and I forget how accurate that comparison often is.