#there’s a lotta things that aren’t great about my situation but like

[gracieo]

Hmmmm. life is kind of miserable at the moment. It’s really astounding how much a housing crisis can directly unironically cause 80% of your mental health issues . everything 2 do with money and all my friends having busy misaligned schedules.

I’m running out of time in college and I’ll probably never get to have that “college experience” of living on/near campus, much less with my friends, but maybe it’s just not meant to be for people like me even if we try for it. I’ve worked a job for a decade now but it’ll still never be enough to have stuff like that. idk. musings. Ramblings . etc

[pinknatural]

After a long while, Jack straightens back up, wiping away his tears.

“Sorry about your shirt,” he says again. Dean waves his hand in dismissal. What’s some snot and tears? 

“It’s fine,” he says again. “I mean it, kid.”

Jack looks like he might begin to cry all over again, but he sniffs and makes a valiant effort not to. They’re in a motel room--Dean couldn’t bear the Bunker, and Sam and Eileen’s honeymoon phase. He’s happy for them, of course he is, but seeing them so in love is kind of painful, and Dean could tell Sam was trying not to be overt about it to spare Dean’s feelings, and Dean just felt that, well--he might as well remove himself from the situation, at least for a little bit. 

(Plus, now he has some peace and quiet--the motel room is littered with books and research, scrolls and files and other pieces of lore--all on the afterlife, of course. All on how to get there.)

“Okay,” Jack says. “Okay.” He raises a glowing hand to his own forehead, but he pauses when his fingers are about an inch away. He swallows. 

“Come on, kid, what are you waiting for?” Dean asks. 

“I could bring her back,” Jack whispers. “I should bring her back.” 

He lowers his hand, turns a stricken gaze to Dean. 

“Who?” Dean asks. He thinks, Kelly. He thinks, Maggie. He thinks, absurdly, Charlie. 

“Emma,” Jack says. 

Dean feels as if he’s been hit over the head. 

“What?” he says. Has he turned into a fish and been left out on the docks? Where did all the air go?

“You’ve been thinking about her,” Jack says, like a confession. “Praying.” He has, if only because he’s been wallowing in what he can’t have, the husband, the daughter. He has, if only because he’s been wondering if the way to the Empty could be through Purgatory. Would he have time to sweep the place first? Would he be able to find her, unlike the last two times he was there?

“Yeah,” Dean tries to say, but no sound comes out. He tries again. “Yeah. You could really…?”

“I can do anything,” Jack says, with a sad, bitter smile, and Dean reaches for him. Jack falls into the embrace, wrapping his arms around Dean’s back, clinging to his shirt. Dean runs a hand up his back, cups the back of his neck. 

“You don’t have to,” Dean says. It’s one of the hardest things he’s ever said. “God, kid, I’d like nothing more, but you don’t have to. You gotta do what’s best for you, you hear me?”

“I know,” Jack says. He sniffles. Dean thinks he might be crying again. “And I love Claire so much but I just want my sister. Dad, I want to bring her back.”

Dean squeezes his son. He closes his eyes. 

“Then bring her back,” he whispers, and one of Jack’s hands leaves Dean’s back. Golden light shines, starting behind Dean and filling up the room, making it brighter and brighter and Jack gets smaller and smaller and Dean just holds on, tighter and tighter. 

The light fades. 

A little boy has his face buried in Dean’s gut, arms wrapped tight around Dean. They don’t even go all the way around, anymore. Dean runs a hand through Jack’s hair, stunned even though Jack told him this was what he wanted, even though they’d talked and talked about it before Jack decided to go through with it. 

“What?” a tiny voice says, and Dean turns around. 

Emma is standing there, only she’s not--she’s not exactly the Emma Dean remembers. Instead of being sixteen, she’s something like eight years old, eyes wide and hair tangled with leaves. She’s splattered with blood, and wearing the same clothes she’d died in--the same clothes Dean buried her in. They’re too big for her, and she looks like she’s on the verge of tears. 

“What happened?” she asks, looking around the motel room wildly. “Where am I?”

“Emma,” Dean says, untangling himself from the three year old on the bed and kneeling, reaching out gently. He stays near the bed, afraid of spooking her. “You were rescued from Purgatory. You’re safe.” He turns to Jack. “Why is she little?”

“She’s human,” Jack says, shrugging. He’s chewing on the end of his sleeve, eyes wide. His clothes, at least, are three-year-old sized. Dean wonders where he’s supposed to get Emma some clothes, but there’s a pink suitcase sitting beside Dean’s duffel. The sight of it is too much, and he looks back at his daughter. 

“Safe?” Emma repeats, looking down at her hands. She flexes her tiny fingers. 

“Eight years have passed,” Dean says, still holding out his hands--he’s not sure if he’s trying to soothe her or reach for her. “You’re safe, you don’t have to kill anyone, I won’t hurt you.”

Emma looks around again. She sees her suitcase and stares at it, then swings her gaze back around. “Who’s that?” She points at Jack. 

“That’s Jack, that’s my son,” Dean says. “Your brother. He brought you back.”

“How?”

“He was powered up--he was God--but now he’s just a kid,” Dean says. “He, um, wanted to bring you back.”

“Dada was prayin’ for you,” Jack says, voice muffled around the sleeve he’s still chewing. Dean reaches out and gently removes it from his mouth. “He wanted you to come back. I wanted to meet you.”

“Oh,” Emma says. She looks down at her pants. “I’m all dirty.”

“Yeah,” Dean says. “The bathroom’s over there if you want to--shower. I can help you if you want.”

Emma shakes her head and reaches for her suitcase. She goes into the bathroom, turning around and looking back at Dean and Jack, eyes wide, until she shuts the door behind her. Dean collapses back onto his feet, running his hands over his face, laughing incredulously. 

“I did good?” Jack asks, sliding off the bed and crawling onto Dean’s lap. “I did good?”

“Yeah, buddy,” Dean says, voice cracking. He hears the shower turn on, the water begin to run. He curls up tight over Jack. “You did great.”

--

The first thing Cas is aware of is big blue eyes. The rest of the features on that face sharpen into a nose and mouth, grace smearing around the small face, and although it seems impossible, it can only be--

“Jack?”

“Daddy!” Jack cries, and he throws himself onto Cas. Cas catches him easily, holds his tiny body within his arms. Oh, he’s so small. His golden wings stretch as big as they go, which is not very big, to wrap themselves around Cas, and reflexively he wraps his own around Jack as well, holding him tight, rocking slightly back and forth.

Then he remembers--everything, and that he’s supposed to be dead, and he looks up.

Green eyes. Freckles, slightly crooked nose, beloved mouth, beloved jawline.

“Cas,” Dean croaks, and he falls to his knees. Cas is on the floor, legs crossed and Jack curled up on his lap. Cas doesn’t want to let go but Jack wiggles away, and Cas is afraid to reach out but helpless to do anything else.

Dean crawls toward him, falls against him. He presses his face into Cas’ neck and breathes, in and out, and Cas thinks he might be crying. But Cas is breathing Dean in, and he smells like the Impala (home) and guns (safety) and lemon (Dean) and Cas’ eyes aren’t very dry, either. 

“You dumb son of a bitch,” Dean says, voice tucked safe into the place between Cas’ neck and shoulder. “You goddamned idiot. You stupid fucker. You dumbass, you, you.”

“Dean,” Cas says, and Dean shudders out a shaky breath, breathes heavily against him. Dean is alive in Cas’ arms, and he couldn’t be happier.

He tilts his gaze up, looking for Jack, and he finds instead a little girl with brown-blonde hair. She’s wearing a pink t-shirt and denim shorts and one of Dean’s flannels. She’s practically swimming in it, but her sleeves are rolled up and her eyes are the same apple-green as Dean’s, and Cas holds Dean tighter. 

“Emma?” he asks. She nods and looks away uncomfortably. 

“Emmie, Emmie, my daddy’s back,” Jack says, bouncing over to her and dancing around, wings flapping madly. 

“Yeah,” Emma says. 

Dean clears his throat and finally leans back from Cas. He reaches out an arm and Emma comes over to him, sitting on the floor beside him and tucking herself against his side. Dean wipes away tears with his other hand as Jack barrels back around, throwing himself into Cas’ lap. Cas holds him and looks around. 

They’re in a motel room, two queen beds, identical to the countless ones Sam and Dean have stayed in over the years. But there’s a pink suitcase next to the TV and a blue duffel with sharks on it beside it. On one of the beds there’s a pair of stuffed rabbits, one pink and one yellow. There are various books and scrolls piled on the little table beside the couch and also piled onto the couch itself. Spell ingredients are on the floor, spread out over a placemat. 

“Daddy,” Emma says, and Cas looks at her, tugging on Dean’s overshirt. His heart melts. Dean deserves nothing less, of course, but he knows what toll gaining then losing a daughter has had on Dean. He’s so glad that Dean can have her back, that she can have Dean, too, that she can have another chance. She deserves it, and already Cas looks at her and sees her hair in a careful braid and her Wonder Woman socks and he knows he would die for her. “If me and Jack are siblings and you’re Jack’s dad and that’s Jack’s dad, too, then. Um.”

She looks at Cas nervously. Dean squeezes her shoulders. 

“Me and Cas have to talk about all that,” Dean says. Cas is astounded that it’s not an instant denial. 

“We do?” he asks, and Dean meets his gaze head on.

“Yeah,” he says. “We got a lotta stuff to talk about, you and me. Kids, why don’t you watch some TV and Cas and I’ll go outside.”

Jack scrambles off of Cas’ lap and turns around, presses a wet kiss to Cas’ cheek, then he climbs onto the bed with the stuffed animals. He grabs onto the yellow bunny and Emma crawls beside him, putting the pink bunny on her lap and pointing the remote at the TV. Cas stands and offers his hand to Dean, who takes it, lets Cas pull him up.

Dean goes outside and Cas follows, of course he does. They don’t let go of each other’s hands. 

“Why are we in a motel?” Cas asks. Dean shrugs. 

“Needed some space,” he says. “Then I wasn’t sure how big of a house to get.”

“A house?”

“Yeah,” Dean says. He rubs at the back of his neck with his free hand. “Can’t raise kids in a bunker, come on man.”

“What about Sam?”

“He’s fine,” Dean says. “On a hunt with Eileen.”

“Oh,” Cas says, slightly confused. 

“Yeah, I dunno,” Dean says. “Salt-and-burn in Orlando, I think. So, um, listen, man…”

“Thank you for getting me out of the Empty,” Cas blurts, afraid Dean is about to reject him. He has always known Dean would do so, but he thinks to hear it would be--upsetting.

“Of course,” Dean says. “You’re, um. I couldn’t just leave you there, you’re--”

“Family?” Cas suggests.

“Yeah,” Dean says. He takes a step forward. “Though, you know, I’ve been thinkin’ about what we are to each other.”

“You have?” Cas takes a step back when Dean takes another step forward. 

“Yeah,” Dean breathes. “Living together, raising a kid together, dying for each other. Never wanting to be apart.”

“Oh?” Cas says, and his back hits the wall. Dean stands over him, caging him in with only one hand--the other still wrapped around Cas’ palm, their fingers intertwined. 

“You know what that sounds like?” Dean asks, breath ghosting along Cas’ jaw, and Cas can’t really think. Why is Dean standing so close to him?

“Family?” Cas croaks, brain stuck on the word. Family, they’re family.

“I was thinking it sounded like husbands, Cas,” Dean says, and then Cas doesn’t have to worry about why Dean is standing so close anymore, because Dean kisses him, and Cas’ brain ceases functioning--but it’s okay, because if Dean says they’re husbands, who is Cas to argue?

--

Sam pulls up to the motel after dropping Eileen off at the Bunker. She was tired from driving all night and Sam doesn’t blame her, but he can’t believe he’s missed everything while he went to one measly salt-and-burn.

He parks the car and gets out, crossing the parking lot. He knocks on the door and Claire opens it. She looks the same as always, except she has a purple stuffed bunny peeking out of her jacket pocket. Sam is smart enough not to comment on this. 

She steps aside and lets him in, and Emma squeaks and practically climbs up Dean when she sees him. It’s a work in progress, with her, and Sam feels terrible but he’s not sure what he can do besides give her time, so he looks away and instead turns to Cas, who smiles when he sees him. 

“Sam!” he says, and he stands up from the couch, crosses the room and hugs him. 

“It’s good to see you,” Sam says, clapping Cas on the back.

“Sam!” Jack says, and he barrels towards Sam’s legs with the determination of a battering ram, and Sam intercepts him before he can make contact, picking him up and swinging him over his shoulder. Jack laughs and laughs, and Kaia waves at Sam from her spot curled up on the couch. 

“This motel room is very full,” Sam says, looking around, and Dean grins at him. 

“That’s why we’re shopping, Sammy,” he says, and he points at his laptop. 

“Find anything good?” Sam asks, crossing the room to sit on the couch so he can see the computer. He deposits Jack into Cas’ arms, and Dean comes to sit on his other side. Emma stays on the bed, hiding behind Claire, who’s obviously taking guard-duty pretty seriously since she’s half-glaring at Sam.

Sam looks away and turns his gaze toward the computer. 

“We weren’t finding any good listings so we’re looking for some land, now,” Dean says. 

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay in the Bunker? We’ve got a lotta room,” Sam says. 

“Nah,” Dean says. He slings his arm around Cas, who’s perched on the arm of the couch. “We need a house.”

“Windows,” Cas says solemnly, tangling his and Dean’s fingers, and Sam notes the movement with a pleased smile. 

“But if we build a house we can add-in wards and stuff, right into the foundations,” Dean says. “We can make sure it’s safe, and good.”

“Will you build it?” Sam asks, even though he knows the answer. 

“Damn straight,” Dean says. The silver band on his ring finger flashes as he shuts the laptop. Jack crawls into Kaia’s lap, and she wraps her arms around him. 

“I think it’s a good idea,” she says. 

“Yeah,” Sam says. He meets his brother’s eyes. “Me too.”

(ao3)

[dolliedarlin]

Hi I’m one of the anons who’s obsessing over the P.A series!!!!! For some reason my brain has been full w diff things that could happen IDKKK! Hope u don’t mind if I dump a few....

TW: this is A bunch of rambling and some grammar errors LMAO sorry

Idk y I c y/n having a stalker💀 this prob sounds rlly weird but hear me out. (To add drama, also I Lowkey wanna c Mina,Sero and kiri get mad idk y-)

Since we all know y/n is the baddest most sophisticated b*tch (sorry idk if I’m allowed to cuss or not LMAO) her Ex lover is still obsessed w her and thinks that they are soulmate even tho they obv aren’t. I feel like y/n knows he stalks her but she ignores it until it gets worst. Like he found out where she lives. (He finds out where she lives while she’s sick which is now loll)

Anyways I feel like Mina would be over at y/ns place and since she’s getting better they are In her living room talking abt who knows what and y/n gets a knock on her door she goes to open it and admittedly closes it looking shocked. Mina being a pro hero is  supposed to be able to read body language. Mina ask her if everything is Alr and y/n OFC (stupid a**) says yes. Mina didn’t want to keep pressing the issue so she dropped it until it became a reoccurring thing with y/n and it’s not just her that noticed. She (y/n) is extremely hesitant to open the door and when she does she opens it a little bit. (And then idk her EX does crazy like breaks into her apt and scares the sh** outa y/n) THIS IS WHERE MY BIG IDEA STOPS 😭😭😭😭😭😭 that was a lotta rambling my apologies

Have a great day dollie!

oh no! please don’t feel bad, it’s always fun for me seeing what you dolls would want to happen next

although i don’t plan on bringing any psycho exes into ‘the p.a’ series, as a writer and an avid daydreamer, i can’t help but play around with this idea 

warning: there are brief mentions of violence ; this is not a part of ‘the p.a’ series but is just a little thought that i just couldn’t help but try my own hand at also ; i didn’t edit this either 😂 so kindly forgive any grammatical/spelling mistakes 

continuing on from your idea...

⏤mina, having the sneaking suspicion that something bad might happen to you that night, notifies the rest of the group later on that day

⏤usually, bakugou was in charge of you during the night and always sat in a chair beside your bed on high alert, ready to serve your every need...

⏤BUT!

⏤now that mina told them about your suspicious behaviour, all of them were put on high alert. 

⏤they all agreed to keep you unaware of their intentions by having bakugou take care of you like usual but they made sure that when on the night patrol, they were close by with their radios on and constantly being hyper aware of the shortest route to your residence from wherever they were situated - just in case of an emergency 

⏤naturally, they trusted bakugou with keeping you safe but that didn’t mean that they had no worries for you at all 

⏤seeing as you usually feel asleep before bakugou switched with the sero, who took care of you in the late evening, you were under the impression that you were alone at home 

⏤your current condition disallowed you from comfortably staying awake so you were constantly tossing and turning in bed, brows furrowed and sweating more than usual

⏤”what is she dreaming about?” bakugou utters in frustration as he continues to wipe away the vastly accumulating sweat rom your wrinkled brows

⏤he wasn’t frustrated at you no no, he was annoyed at the fact that he couldn’t make you comfortable no matter how many wet towels he uses to cook your forehead or wipe your sweat clean off your skin 

⏤as the night progresses, you eventually fall into a dreamless sleep, far too exhausted to continue stressing over your ex with the added burden of your fever on your body

⏤nevertheless, bakugou continues being on high alert at all times except for when he momentarily leaves to room so as to go to the toilet 

⏤this was the perfect opportunity for your crazy ex to sneak into your room via the window bakugou left ajar so as to help cool you down better 

⏤your ex was a creepy and disgusting man - someone that you had grown to dislike the more you got to know him and naturally left as quickly as you were able to 

⏤what followed was harassment to the highest degree, thankfully you were able to protect yourself due to your self defence training and quirk, however, it didn’t take away the shuddering feeling of being watched constantly

⏤you grew paranoid and extremely fidgety over time and eventually filled for a restraining order. unfortunately, that didn’t work and left you to deal with the situation yourself

⏤you were naive enough to think that you had shaken him after a particularly horrible beating he took from you in self defence. he had come at you with a knife but you were able to disarm him and send him limping home with a dislocated arm, a black eye and a bruised ribcage 

⏤over time, you got busy with work and slowly forgot about him, it wasn’t until today that you were reminded of his crazy obsession with you and were thrown into a panic 

⏤believing that you were alone at night and in your most vulnerable state, you didn’t feel safe and sought to deal with the situation however you could, even in your dreams

⏤all attempts were in vain, however

⏤bakugou, returning from his momentary break to the toilet came back just in time to see your creepy ex hovering over your sleeping figure. as if you sensed the unpleasant existence stalking you, your body stiffened under the blankets and you began to breathe uncomfortably, beginning to sweat bucket-fulls once more

⏤not wanting to disturb your sleep as rest was the top priority for you, bakugou crept up from behind the unknown figure and instantly went for his neck, choking him into silence as he dragged his thrashing figure outside, far away from you all the while sending a emergency signal to the rest of the squad 

⏤in no time at all, the rest of the squad arrived and had your crazy ex cornered. at this time he had already been tied up by bakugou and was ready for a quick chat 

⏤”what the hell were you doing with our yn?” kirishima began, sharp teeth grinding together as he clenched his jaw 

⏤silence 

⏤”speak up, we can’t fucking hear you,” bakugou spat as the others glared on from beside him, their eyes piercing through the moonlight and darkness of the night 

⏤”y-yn isn’t yours - that’s the first thing,” your ex finally cracked, giggling creepily in between 

⏤”you’re right,” sero began, “yn doesn’t belong to anyone so why were did you break into her house,” it took everything in sero not to lash out but they needed answers

⏤”wrong again!” your ex sang, “she doesn’t belong to you, she belongs to me! i’m her boyfriend!”

⏤”yn doesn’t have a boyfriend,” kaminari spoke up

⏤”that’s right! and if she did, we would have known,” mina agreed

⏤“that’s because she doesn’t know it yet, we broke up but we’ll get back together again soon” the tied up man giggled to himself, “it’s only a matter of time before she realises her mistake and she comes back to me,” 

⏤the team of heroes didn’t know what to say, they were so shocked and appalled at what they were seeing and hearing that they couldn’t bring themselves to utter a single word of response, they only listened further

⏤”i hoped she’d come back soon, anyway...but i was getting impatient so i had to try and convince her a little more. she’s been ignoring my love for her all this time, she can’t continue rejecting me for long...” he laughs, “i bet she misses it”

⏤“miss what...?” bakugou didn’t want to know but it had to be said

⏤”i bet she misses being with me. she’s so beautiful and so soft to the touch, she always smells good too and she has such a lovely voice - i want her all to myself, she doesn’t deserve to be anybody else’s”

⏤it was then that the team of heroes just about lost their minds. the creep before them didn’t say anything explicit but the madness in his eyes and the harrowing smile he was displaying was off putting. they dread to imagine what a lowlife nasty sob like him put you through but they saw flashes of unforgivable scenes that sent all of them into insanity 

⏤someone so precious to them didn’t deserve any such treatment. you may not have disclosed anything to them strict on being professional but if this man was willing to break into your house...they were fearful to think about what else he was capable of

⏤he deserved a beating from that act alone, actually, and a beating he got

⏤they could’ve killed the guy - they were more than tempted to and it would have been so easy...but he deserved to suffer in jail for his crimes against you so they held back no matter how painful that was for them 

⏤the very next day, under their authority and recommendation, the man was locked up for as many years as they could tally up and seeing as they were heroes, they were able to look into his past documentations and found you had filed a restraining order for him under harassment, assault and a number of other things they grew all the more furious at the more the read

⏤they would prefer it if you didn’t realise what they did that night but the media couldn’t let the story of 5 high class pro heroes sending a singular, beaten man to jail for life

⏤your creepy ex’s battered photos were all over the news and you were so incredibly grateful  

[hurricanery]

If You Went Away - pt. 6

A/N: Here’s part 6 of If You Went Away! Thank you for the encouraging messages <3 This fic might only have one or two more parts, but I have other exciting things planned!

Other parts here: part 1 // part 2 // part 3 // part 4 // part 5

-------

(present day)

“You look….cheerful?” Maggie gives Amelia a once over as the brunette walks into the attendings lounge.

Amelia squints back at her as she reaches for her purse and starts changing out of her scrubs. “I don’t know if cheerful is the right word, Maggie.”

“Okay….happier than usual as of late?”

Amelia smirks as she pulls her jacket on, then sits down to zip up her boots. She hadn’t realized her current emotional state was such a topic of conversation, or even observation.

“Scout’s got his last check up with Nico today. Right now, actually. So I’m out of here early.” She relaxes back into the seat.

“Oh? And where’s Link?” Maggie questions, sitting at the table across from Amelia.

“He’s in surgery. So it’s just me,” Amelia explains. “But, we’re just….excited he doesn’t have to have his arm wrapped up in that sling anymore. Especially for this weekend.”

“What’s this weekend?” Maggie’s eyebrows pull together in confusion and she watches as Amelia huffs out an exasperated sigh.

“Link’s parents' wedding….” Amelia mutters under her breath. If her outlook seemed cheerful when she walked into the room, it was definitely dwindling now.

“Oh my god, I totally forgot about that! I thought that already happened?”

“I wish,” Amelia breathes. “They started planning this years ago. But then, ya know, the whole pandemic….and some other stuff got in the way….but that’s all over now and they’re finally ready, I guess. And so….yeah, that’s happening this weekend….” She trails off, zoning out as she thinks about the event ahead.

There’s brief silence as Maggie watches her sister’s anxiety overcome her previously lighthearted disposition.

“How’s Link feeling about all of this?”

“Ha,” Amelia laughs sarcastically. “Not great. He still feels pretty….betrayed? By his parents? Maybe that’s the feeling?”

“Hm.” Maggie hums, digesting the information and slowly coming to terms with another realization about the situation.

“His parents put him through a lot,” Amelia explains, becoming more animated as she continues. “But I just keep trying to tell him not to take it so harshly....You know? I mean….they found their way back to each other after all this time. Why is that so bad?”

“Hmmmm,” Maggie hums again, drawing the sound out a bit more. She smirks, scanning Amelia’s face like she’s onto something.

“I mean, it’s kind of inspiring, right?”

Maggie pauses for a moment, deciding her next words. “Let me get this straight….you find it inspiring?”

Amelia shrugs, still not catching onto Maggie’s perception of her words.

“You find it inspiring….that two people can make their way back to each other after….certain difficulties?” Maggie smirks.

And Amelia frowns, the comprehension of Maggie’s attempt at an analogy settles in.

Maggie watches as Amelia’s face goes blank with realization. But then the brunette is standing up suddenly, pushing away from the table.

“Maggie no!” She throws her bag over her shoulder, getting ready to leave. “That’s not….no. That’s not what I’m saying. You’re putting words in my mouth.”

“Hey,” Maggie smiles as she folds her arms across her chest, watching Amelia as she hurries towards the door. “You’re the one that said it. I’m just putting two and two together.”

Amelia turns around once more before reaching the door, but Maggie’s smug look causes her to roll her eyes. She pushes through the door, letting it slam shut harshly.

_______

The following day Amelia runs around the house anxiously, trying to make sure everyone is ready for the wedding.

“Scout!” She yells from the kitchen as Scout sits with his eyes glued to the TV. “Come on, time to get ready!”

After some convincing, Scout finally follows his mother up the stairs and into his bedroom.

“You can go back and watch your show once you get dressed, okay?” Amelia walks to the closet, pulling out a tiny suit jacket and matching pants. She smiles to herself as she pulls the garments from the hanger, running her hands over the fabric before laying them across Scout’s bed.

“Why do I have to wear that?” Scout whines.

“Because weddings are like fancy parties,” Amelia smiles as she crouches down to help Scout into his wedding attire.

Scout frowns, adjusting to the uncomfortable suit jacket that his arms have just been guided into.

“Why are Grandma and Grandpa having a wedding? Are they already husband and wife?”

“Well….” Amelia bites her lip. Mentally sighing at just how smart Scout can be sometimes.

“You can do a wedding as many times as you want?” He questions, squinting up at Amelia.

“Uh, yeah….” She slightly frowns at the accuracy of his question. It was an easier explanation than the reality. “Yeah, you can.”

“You and daddy aren’t married.” Scout says matter-of-factly.

“Um, no,” Amelia mutters as she begins helping Scout into his dress shoes. Her pulse quickens at the direction this conversation is taking.

“Why not?”

Amelia sighs, out loud this time. She hears the shower turn off in the next room and knows that Link is probably finishing up getting ready, while she remains completely unready.

“We just aren’t….” She offers shortly, standing up once she’s satisfied with how Scout’s outfit comes together. “Not everybody gets married.”

Scout looks up at her curiously. “But you said you can have as many weddings as you want. I think you and daddy should have a lotta weddings!”

Amelia can’t help but to laugh at this.

“Okay, buddy,” She grins down at him. “Let’s see how you like this wedding, first.”

“Can I go finish my show now?”

Amelia nods, and Scout takes off down the stairs while Amelia heads to get ready herself.

_______

45 minutes later and Amelia has her dress and heels on. She’s done her hair in soft waves and she’s just finishing up the final touches of her makeup when Link enters the bedroom, walking past the adjoining bathroom, Amelia hears him softly gasp.

She pauses her lipstick application, glancing at Link through the bathroom mirror. She raises her eyebrows at him.

“You look….” Link stutters, scratching at the back of his neck anxiously. “The dress…..the blue is a really nice color on you. You look really nice.” He shrugs, dropping his hands to the side.

Amelia suppresses a blush. It was a dress she’d worn to Alex and Jo’s wedding years ago. She was relieved at the chance to re-wear it, since nobody she knew would be at this wedding, or know she was recycling it for the occasion. She was just happy to not have to purchase another dress.

“Thank you,” She smiles slightly, resuming her task in the mirror. “So do you.” Her eyes dart back to him briefly. “I’m almost ready.”

“No rush.”

“Well, I don’t want to be late. So….there’s kind of a rush.” She laughs under her breath. “You’re just not excited about this at all, are you?”

Link sighs as he sits on the edge of the bed, still in Amelia’s line of sight through the mirror. He shakes his head. “No….but, starting now, I’m going to be positive about this.”

“Hey,” she mutters, starting to put away her makeup products. “I’m nervous, too.”

“Hm?” Link looks up at her as she re-enters the bedroom.

“I’m nervous to be around your family….I don’t know,” she mutters anxiously, reaching for her coat and purse. “They have no idea we were even….apart….” she cuts herself off from going in that direction. “They just don’t know me very well.”

Link nods. Knowing there is so much more to it. So much more that Amelia didn’t say.

“Let’s just make the best of it tonight,” He offers.

And Amelia nods in agreement.

_______

After a short ceremony in which Amelia and Link struggle to keep Scout settled in his seat and non-disruptive, they are completely relieved to have moved on to the reception part of the night.

They smile their way through introductions and explanations. And Amelia grits her teeth at the repetitive questions from distant family members.

‘How long have you guys been together?’

‘So nice of you to finally bring Scout around!’

‘What are your plans for the future?’

Amelia holds back her discomfort. And holds a tight smile. The only thing anchoring her being the equal dismay on Link’s part. The impatient tightness in his voice as he answers the same questions over and over weirdly brings her comfort. Just to know that she’s not the only one feeling totally out of place here.

The question that sets her off the most though, comes from Link’s uncle. But, when Link is asked whether or not he’s ‘being courted by the Mariners for another contract this upcoming season,’ Link reaches over and squeezes Amelia’s shoulders assuringly.

She sighs in relief at the vagueness of his answer.

“We like to take things one step at a time.”

And Amelia turns away from Link’s uncle, gazing up at Link, surprised by the feeling that swells in her chest.

_______

As the night continues, the energy becomes much less stressful. Although Link was very much not looking forward to this event, the energy of the room is having an effect on him. His relatives are dancing and talking and celebrating. It’s an overall joyful atmosphere. And Link is relieved. Relieved to be not so burdened by his initial distaste at the idea of this wedding in the first place.

Link smiles as he glances across the room. He watches as Amelia pulls Scout onto the dance floor, reaching forward for his little arms. She bends slightly as she twirls him around, Scout in a fit of giggles.

Link watches the two of them for a few more minutes, until the fast-paced song switches over to a slower one. There’s a round of cheers from family members and friends as the atmosphere changes and couples begin arranging themselves for a slow dance.

The next thing he knows, Link is crossing the dance floor himself.

“May I cut in?” He asks as he approaches, looking pointedly at Scout, his tone playful.

Scout glances between his parents as Amelia drops his hands. He looks around the room at the couples swaying slowly, then he’s nodding excitedly as he turns back to his parents.

“I can take him over to where some of the other kids are playing,” one of Link’s family friends chimes in suddenly and Link smiles, nodding a thank you as Scout runs off to be with the other kids.

Then they are alone. Just the two of them surrounded by other couples.

“Dance with me?” Link reaches a hand out to Amelia.

And she hesitates only briefly before taking it. Her pulse quickens out of nowhere and she tries to suppress the feeling that grows, the feeling that’s reminding her of every high school dance ever. Because she isn’t in high school. And this isn’t some high school crush. This is Link. The father of her child. And this is his parent’s wedding.

His hand clasps around hers, pulling her forward, and his other arm settles around her waist. Amelia’s free arm automatically rests over his, her hand coming down to rest against his shoulder.

There’s still a slight distance between them, the uncertainty of their positioning quite evident. Until Link pulls her even closer, so that she’s putting more of her weight against his chest. Amelia suppresses a gasp, looking briefly between his eyes. Before the eye contact becomes too much and she glances past him, over his shoulder instead.

“So,” Link murmurs, allowing her eyes to drift away from him. “Tonight wasn’t so bad.”

“Mhm,” she hums in agreement, her eyes settling on Link’s parents behind them. “Your parents are cute.”

Link shifts them around, so he can have a better view of his parents in the center of the dance floor.

“It took them a while to get to the cute stage, in my opinion,” Link looks back down at Amelia. He still towers over her, even when she’s wearing heels and it makes Link smile. Amelia laughs at his words, rolling her eyes.

“You’re always going to hold it against them, huh?”

Link shakes his head, like he’s deciding something. “No….no I won’t. I can be happy for them.”

Amelia nods up at him, and holds eye contact. She adjusts herself, letting her arm slide up further, resting around the back of his neck.

“This was fun. Scout had fun.”

“He did,” Link murmurs, letting his hand begin circling a repetitive pattern across her lower back.

Link notices the song change. Back to an upbeat tune, not so much fit for a slow dance. But it seems to take Amelia a moment to catch on. Because before she’s noticed the beat change, her head drops momentarily to rest against Link’s chest. They’re still swaying back and forth slowly, as if the song hasn’t changed.

But then the DJ makes an announcement, something about requests for other songs. And Amelia shakes from her reverie. Stepping out of Link’s embrace, she takes in the atmosphere of the increasingly crowded dance floor.

“We should probably find Scout,” she mutters, eyes scanning the room.

Link follows after her as she begins crossing the room. They approach the kid’s table to see Scout sitting with his head resting down in front of him. He’s surrounded by other kids but he’s fighting off sleep with his head resting against his arms on the table.

“Think we should call it a night?” Link mutters, and Amelia nods, gently stepping forward to wake Scout up.

_______

Link hears light snoring as he drives them home. He glances in the rearview mirror, to the backseat, and smiles to himself at the sight of both Amelia and Scout sound asleep. She’d insisted on sitting back there with him for the drive home. Link shakes his head now, realizing it was probably because there was more room back there for her to drift off, too.

The car pulls into the driveway and Link turns the engine off, stepping out and around to Scout’s side of the car. He opens the door gently, not wanting to wake him up. He lifts Scout as carefully as possible, and that’s when Amelia stirs. She sits up suddenly, eyes darting around in confusion.

“Hey,” Link whispers. “I’m going to carry him up. You should head to bed, too.”

Amelia nods, realizing her surroundings. She climbs out of the car, following after Link and Scout inside.

_______

Amelia takes a makeup wipe to her eyes as she rests tiredly against the bathroom counter. She blinks sleepily despite herself, but would never go to bed without taking her makeup off first.

Link huffs as he enters the bedroom, glancing at Amelia through the open bathroom door before sitting on the edge of the bed to slip his shoes off. “He is not as light as he used to be,” he laughs, referring to carrying Scout to bed.

“Mhm,” Amelia hums, “He’s growing up so fast.”

Link disappears from Amelia’s line of sight, entering the closet to hang his suit jacket and slip on some sweatpants. He collapses into bed shortly after while Amelia finishes getting ready for bed.

She’s still wearing her dress as she heads to the closet and Link’s voice causes her to pause for a second. “You should wear that dress more,” He mumbles sleepily.

And Amelia rolls her eyes, holding back a smirk, as she enters the closet to change.

She appears a moment later, dressed for bed. Her equally exhausted state leads her to collapse onto her side of the bed in similar fashion to Link.

“I’m serious,” Link mutters. Amelia turns her head to the side, noticing how his eyes remain closed. She’s relieved that he can’t see her sheepish expression.

“I want to start over, Amelia.” His eyes open now, searching for hers. And Amelia swallows her nerves. “I want to take you on a date.”

She laughs. Because this is not what she was expecting.

“What?” She mumbles through her uncertain laugh.

“And I want you to wear that dress.” He sounds like he’s fighting off sleep again and Amelia finds herself hesitant to agree to him while they’re both so exhausted. Hesitant because she doesn’t know how much he means it.

“You don’t have to answer me right now,” Link continues, muttering into his pillow a bit as he settles onto his side, eyes closing again. “But promise me you’ll think about it?”

Amelia breathes a sigh, biting her lip as she glances at Link’s resting face.

“Okay,” she whispers. And then lets her own eyes shut, too.

//

[beelsnack]

Hiya! I saw ur post about u being stressed at work so please take ur time with this request! There's no rush! Ur wellbeing is more important 💖 But when you get the time how about some headcanons for an MC who is very cute and naive but got teased for being so at RAD so they try to dress "cool" and pretend to be all badass but their tough persona just makes the demon brothers uwu even more cuz they think it's adorable how hard they're trying

Ah, thank you for being patient, Nonnie! I hope this was worth the wait!

I realized a bit too late that I may have misinterpreted your request a little, but I hope it turned out alright anyway. ^^

-----

Lucifer: “Careful, my dear, your face may get stuck like that.”

When the human turned around to greet him, they had their normal cheerful grin on their face. However, Lucifer watched as their expression turned surprised, then frustrated before they managed to school it back into the hilariously deep frown they had been forcing all day.

“Would you mind telling me why you’re making that ridiculous face?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” They fell into step beside him. Even though they had pretty much figured out the layout of RAD, Lucifer insisted on walking with them to the Student Council Chambers. At first, it was just to make sure they didn’t accidentally end up in the torture chambers in the lower levels, but now he genuinely enjoyed the few moments they had alone together. Hearing them chatter on about their day lifted his mood exponentially.

“Don’t think I haven’t noticed.” Lucifer inclined his head. “Force that scowl for much longer and you might pull a facial muscle.”

They wavered for a second before sighing. “Did it really look that bad?”

“It was quite an unnatural look for you.” he replied, a hint of laughter in his voice. “Would you mind telling me just what you were trying to do?”

“...Some demons in my class told me I smiled too much.” they admitted. “So I was trying to...not?”

Lucifer paused, regarding them with a raised eyebrow. “What in the Three Realms does ‘smiling too much’ mean?”

“I’m...not sure honestly,” they shrugged.

“My dear,” he stopped in front of them, placing his hands on their shoulders. “I don’t particularly care what those other demons think or want, but I will not have you depriving me of your beautiful smile.”

Mammon: That was his jacket.

It was way too big on them, making them look even smaller than they already did. It was also very clearly not part of the RAD uniform - not that any of the brothers wore their uniforms correctly, but the human was usually pretty up to code with theirs.

He caught up to them in a few steps and grabbed onto the collar of their - his - jacket. “Hey, human! Just what do you think you’re doing?”

They squeaked in surprise, and for a moment Mammon was caught off guard by how unbearably adorable it was. When they turned around, they were grinning sheepishly at him.

“H-hi Mammon.”

Oof. Honestly, he did not anticipate how seeing them wearing his clothes was going to affect him. The sleeves came down to their knuckles, and they had curled their fingers around the cuffs almost instinctively, It was too cute, he felt like his heart was trying to smash through his ribcage.

“You - you got a whole lotta nerve, stealing from the Great Mammon.” he released their collar, they both continued walking, although he had completely forgotten that his class was in the complete opposite direction.

“You left it in my room, though.”

“Doesn’t explain why you’re wearin’ it!”

“I’m sorry.” they sighed, beginning to shrug the jacket off of their shoulders. “Some demons were picking on me, so I thought they would leave me alone if I dressed a bit tougher. It didn’t work anyway, so I’ll give it back now.”

They were just about to yank their arms out of the sleeves when Mammon shook his head.

“Keep it, if it makes you feel better.” he definitely wasn’t blushing, nope, not even a little bit. “I’ve got others, so just accept the Great Mammon’s generosity.”

Leviathan: “Please tell me you didn’t pay a stupid amount of cash for those.”

The human frowned up at Levi, putting a hand over their new headphones almost protectively. “I paid a perfectly reasonable amount!”

“I wouldn’t pay anything for those,” he frowned. “The manufacturers would have to pay me, actually.”

“Alright, alright, I get it!” they huffed. “I just bought them so people would stop talking about me when they think I’m listening.”

Levi tilted his head. “Huh?”

The human sighed, playing idly with the cord of the headphones. “Some demons in my Curses class like to freak me out by saying how yummy I look when they catch my eye. I kind of hoped that they would stop if they weren’t getting a rise out of me.”

A white-hot surge of protectiveness crashed over him as the human curled in on themself. He might have been a giant otaku, but he would be damned if he let anything happen to his best friend. Well, more damned than he already was, anyway.

“You should have just said something,” he shoved his hands in his pockets. “I have an old pair you can have. They still work fine, but they released a limited-edition Ruri-chan version and obviously I have to rep my waifu so I’ve been using those - “

Satan: “Can I ask you something?”

The two of them were on their way to the RAD’s library. Satan honestly didn’t need to study, but the human definitely did, and using an academic excuse meant that Lucifer was more likely to leave the two of them alone.

“Of course,” Satan held the door open for them. Without even bothering to look, he began walking over to the table that had basically become their territory. Even if there were other demons there, they would probably scamper off.

“How do you get people to be afraid of you?”

Satan paused, raising an eyebrow in an expression that definitely did not make him look strikingly like Lucifer. “Me specifically?”

“Yeah.”

“Well, being the Avatar of Wrath gives me a leg up.”

The human scowled. “Damn it.”

“Why would you want people to be afraid of you?” Satan asked as they sat down. Up until this point, the human’s modus operandi was being so sweet that nobody ever wanted to hurt them, so the threatening angle was a complete 180.

“Some demons in class were making comments about me being dessert.” they mumbled, taking out their textbooks before slinging their bag over the back of the chair. “I honestly couldn’t tell if they were talking about my personality or my flesh, so…”

“Okay, first of all,” Satan leaned forward on his elbows. “We kill them.”

“Satan, no.”

Asmodeus: “Oh, darling, what have you done to yourself?”

They really needed to get a “Do Not Disturb” sign or something. Not that it would stop anything, but still.

Asmo at least had the decency to shut the door behind him, but that was as far as it went. He was openly staring at them, doing his best impression of the Scream painting.

“The makeup tutorial made this look so much easier.” they sighed, leaning back in their chair.

“They always do,” Asmo came over behind them, placing his hands on their shoulders as he leaned down to look at their laptop screen. “Never trust the ones on Sinterest.”

Their final product looked nothing like the model on the screen. The wings of their eyeliner were crooked, and one eye was longer than the other. The contouring made them look like a clown, and somehow they had gotten black eyeshadow on their nose.

“That’s quite the change of pace for you, darling.” Asmo commented, “It’s a look, but why the sudden switch?”

The human remained silent, their bottom lip quivering in a way that made Asmo want to gathering them up in a blanket. Eventually, they sighed again.

“All the succubi look so cool, and I always look...” they paused. “Human.”

“Darling, I don’t know how to break this to you - “

“I know, I know.” they grumbled. “I just wanted to look badass for once!”

The puppy-dog pout they had going on wasn’t doing anything for that particular look, but Asmo decided to keep that comment to himself. Instead, he spun them around, hands still on their shoulders. “Now, now, don’t make that face. Let’s see if we can’t fix this up a little, hm?”

Beelzebub: “What are you doing?”

He hadn’t meant to scare them, but they jumped like he had jumped from the ceiling. The yelp they let out made him feel guilty. Maybe Mammon was right when he said that Beel was disturbingly sneaky for someone his size.

Usually the gym was empty when he came for his morning workout, so seeing the human seated on the workout bench was a definite surprise. Not a bad one though.

“Beel!” the set the weight down. “Um…g-good morning…?”

“Morning,” he replied, making his way over to where they were situated. “You’re not usually one to workout, much less this early in the morning.”

“I, uh…” they stammered. “I wanted to get a little stronger, is all.”

“Not that I’m going to stop you,” he set his gym bag down next to the weight rack. “But why?”

They grumbled under their breath, but eventually sighed. “Some demons at RAD told me I looked chewy.”

“I mean, you kind of do.”

“Hey!”

“All humans look chewy, though.” he shrugged. “It’s not a bad thing. But you want to build up some muscle, right?”

They pouted, and Beel really wanted to reach out and pat them on the head. Instead, he sat next to them on the bench and handed them the weight they had been using.

“Okay, so you want to hold it like this…”

Belphegor: “You had a funny dream last night.”

They had learned from experience that telling Belphie to stop invading their privacy by watching their dreams did exactly fuck all, so they just huffed in annoyance as he flopped against their shoulder. “It wasn’t funny.”

“Amusing, then.”

“For you, maybe.”

They felt him smirk against their shoulder. “You really think a leather jacket and sunglasses will make demons think you’re tough?”

“More than skipping around with flowers in my hair would.”

“I think you would look cute with flowers in your hair. Let’s take some black roses from Diavolo’s garden.”

“Aren’t those poisonous?”

Belphie shifted, nuzzling into their neck as the professor walked in. “It’ll help with the tough image.”

“For about 4 hours until I start foaming at the mouth.” they folded their arms, jostling Belphie from their shoulder.

The demon laughed, pillowing his head in his arms as he leaned forward onto the desk. “I like how you are now. If someone starts giving you trouble, I’ll kill them for you.”

“No cannibalism, please.”

“That’s more Beel’s territory.”

[holy-mountaineering]

Hey friend, I'm dealing with a phenomenally painful breakup (aren't they all though) from a 10+ year relationship. I'm really desperate for any help and advice for how to truly process and feel my emotions, and then how to take advantage of the opportunity for healing and growth provided. But I feel like total shit, have no willpower right now, have never doubted myself so much in my life before, and every waking moment is full of fear and anxiety. Grateful for any help or advice or empathy. Hope you're doing well, truly

Welp anon, you'll get PLENTY of empathy from me for this. Being in love with someone and then, for any variety of reasons, you no longer are "with" them, whether that's physically in their presence, or emotionally/mentally on the same page fuckinging sucks. Especially when you invest yourself, your whole self, into that coupling.

People might notice that I had a very, at times, uncomfortably public romantic relationship with someone who also used tumblr. Years of the super tuff, badass, occultist super couple was great, and I won't diminish how amazing our time together was, but when that was gone... Well, I wasn't sure if a huge part of me went with it. I'm an "all in or why bother" kinda person, or in other words, I have an addictive personality, haha. I wrap myself completely in what I do and who my folks are. These are good things that I like about myself (not the addictive personality, but keep up) but being almost ONE with a person, a human being, full of faults and perfections, with a totally independent central nervous system, can lead to a whole lotta hurt. Like ripping out a chunk of regular ol' flesh and your nerves being like, "HEY, WE NEED THAT!" The separation of a romantic partner, one you've grown together with, is painful and OF COURSE you're experiencing all that shitty fear, anxiety, self doubt, etc, that's the body (not the physical one, but maybe a little bit of that too) telling you that you've lost something, someone, and they're gone now, after growing into them and unless you're dating a walking personality disorder of the Cluster B type, the person who's gone feels it too, even if they say they don't. That's just putting on a brave face so they can move forward, which isn't the worst idea, as long as YOU know how full of shit you are. So, while I guess I don't have any "life hacks" to get over this, except to keep moving forward, outward to the greater World, and inward, to who you are, the authentic YOU who is complete and was before they started to meld with another whole individual being, and know that while this situation and the way you're feeling FUCKING SUCKS now, as soon as you begin to let go and be realistic with yourself, you'll start to get back to you. And don't rush is, me and that person I was talking about above broke up literally YEARS ago now and I am JUST NOW beginning to feel like Me again. You heal as you allow yourself to, don't hold on to the dead and dying. Bury them and plant your garden on top of it so they can fuel your new growth. I hope that helps and be kind to yourself, God knows I wasn't and it took me much longer than it could have. People have their reasons and no matter what, they're THEIR reasons and aren't about you.

Unfortunately sometimes, LOVE is the Law, Love Under Will.

-Frater N0VGHT

[unicyclehippo]

oh writer tormented by muse on high, on this valentine's day i humbly request a beaujester dance

it’s still weird to be heroes. heroes is a big word beau would hesitate to use ordinarily, but she’s a little drunk and the word is being thrown around liberally by the townsfolk as they pour drink after drink for the nein and insist on housing them free of charge—only fair, since you saved the building!—and pulling out instruments and food. before too long, it had become an impromptu feast out here on the street, tables carried from the inn, seats and stools and pillows scattered everywhere for those wishing to sit.

there aren’t many. beau reclines on a bench, watching, drinking, but most people are dancing. the bard is actually pretty good—a traveller as well, judging from the fine cut and make of their clothes, the hint of multi-coloured silk cravat at their throat. human, beau thought at first glance, but there is a delicate set to their features, an unnatural grace to their gestures, and when the night grows hot with building bonfires, they tie back their dark hair to reveal faintly pointed ears. their lute is a beautiful thing as well, round-bellied with a slender neck, and the bard’s fingers dance over the strings as they sing and sing, pausing only to tell some tales or drink from the skin on their hip. water, beau guesses, since their fingers hardly ever slip.

beau shifts to water after a short while. if they were in private, somewhere a little less exposed, she’d keep drinking but she doesn’t entirely trust these happy folk, with their open faces and cheerful...cheer.

‘a silver for your thoughts?’

beau looks up from her cup in surprise, only to find that it is the half-elf bard slipping into the seat across from her.

‘lotta coin to drop.’

‘something tells me your thoughts are worth it,’ they answer smoothly, and beau can’t help but be struck by the earnestness in their eyes, the sincere curiosity.

fucking bards.

‘something else is gonna tell you to mind your own business,’ she drawls.

‘oh?’

‘my fist. i’m talking about my fist.’

‘ah!’ the bard laughs. ‘i understand.’ they hold up their hands in surrender—long, clever fingered hands, a lute players hands. and, beau notes with some interest, not entirely absent of scars. ‘you’re one of the mighty nein, right? the group that fought off the monster?’

‘i thought you were minding your own business.’

‘maybe you are my business,’ the bard suggests, tilts their head just so. the smile they offer is equal parts kind, curious, and flirtatious. ‘care to tell me what really happened?’

‘what? gonna write a song about us?’

‘maybe.’

‘we’d have to talk properties and royalties,’ beau snaps, and the bard’s smile only grows.

‘perhaps when everyone is around, then, and not intoxicated. can i ask you something else?’

‘can i stop you?’

‘i’d love for you to try. i’ve been reliably and constantly assured that i talk far too much and it’s only endearing in very specific situations.’ beau snorts. the bard winks. they continue smoothly, ‘what are you doing all the way over here? don’t you want to celebrate? dance?’

beau sighs. pours herself a water, and another for the bard, who takes it with a nod.

‘i just don’t want to.’

‘i don’t believe that.’

‘i don’t care?’ beau shoots back, and the bard laughs. ‘why aren’t you dancing?’

‘clumsy.’

‘liar.’

‘a nice pair we make, hmm?’

beau lazily turns over her hand, flips them off.

‘the truth, then,’ the bard says, and sets both elbows on the table, sets their pointed chin in a delicate hand. ‘i prefer to dance with a partner.’

‘great. don’t think you’ll be short of one,‘ beau tells them, flicking her eyes over the crowd of simple townsfolk. bards—and adventurers like them—are rarely short on partners when it comes to things like this.

‘i’m picky.’

‘bad habit to have.’

‘for food, yes. for dance partners? i don’t think so.’ at some point in the conversation, those bright eyes had banked someone, grown lidded and dark, and there is no mistaking the hand the bard extends to beau as invitation of more than one kind. ‘may i dance with you?’

beau stares. eyes the delicate, smiling face. the pale skin and dark hair. the neat plaits decorated with simple baubles. they look nothing like beau’s normal type—look nothing at all like anyone she has been dreaming of recently—but the invitaion, while real and warm and weighty with intent, is kind and non-demanding.

‘this better not be out of pity,’ she grunts, takes the offered hand.

and she can’t lie, not to the sudden slam of her heart when the bard smiles brightly from ear to ear, as though intensely and pleasantly surprised. beau realises in that moment that despite the confidence, the bard hadn’t expected beau to accept.

‘likewise,’ the bard agrees, and with a subtle twist of their hand suddenly beau’s is no longer gripping it like a handshake but delicately laid atop theirs. ‘charis.’

‘huh?’

‘my name,’ the bard says, and stands to walk beau around the table and out into the courtyard where most of the town is dancing. ‘it’s charis. and yours?’

‘...beau. don’t say it,’ she warns, seeing mischief glint in bright eyes.

‘fine. i’ll save it.’

‘for what?’

‘a moment you find it more endearing.’

beau barks a laugh, flushes as surprise courses through her. it’s easy, with charis, to laugh. and to dance, and flirt. it’s easy—but it doesn’t entirely feel right, and they must feel it as well because though they keep up the light flirting and dance so well that beau kinda feels like she’s almost flying, at some point charis leads them to the edge of the court, close to where beau had been seated earlier in the night, and bows over her hand. excuses themself back to their position, takes their lute back and settles in to sing for the last portion of the night.

‘you look like you had fun.’

beau whirls, eyes wide. ‘jes! hey! uh—‘

‘they’re a good dancer, huh?’

‘uh. yeah. yeah, they are.’

jester nods a few times. smiles wide. there’s something odd about it and beau doesn’t have time to figure if it’s the play of the firelight or something else before jester shoves a hand toward her.

beau stares down at it, then up at her friend, whose cheeks are suddenly dark with new colour.

‘do you—want to dance? i’m not as good as a real life bard, probably, but—‘

beau folds her fingers around jester’s. the dancing has kicked a fever into her veins, a pounding rush that stamps in time with the beat charis keeps with a tapping boot and a hand against the wooden belly of their instrument, magnified by the stamp of boots on stone by every whirling twirling dancer, and it urges her forward, slotting their hands together more fully. her skin is warm and her blood feels hot like she’s been drinking whiskey all night, and all the mild fun flirtation she shared with charis is seared away by the burst of heat in her gut as she steps close, sees jester’s breath hitch. as she slots into place against jester.

‘i didn’t think you liked dancing,’ jester says over the sound of the music, rocks up onto her tiptoes so she can speak it into beau’s ear. her breath tickles. beau shivers. ‘i would’ve asked you earlier!’

beau turns her head slowly. she isn’t far from jester, could kiss her. her heart thumps as the song transitions into something new, faster, louder.

the notes, the melody is familiar but she doesn’t recognise the words.

‘i wish you had,’ beau tells her. watches shock spark behind those most lovely of eyes, quickly followed by excitement, delight, and more, like the crack of flint followed by the spark of light.

[tiredcowpoke]

TITLE: Blank Spots [4] PAIRING: (Somewhat pre-established) Arthur Morgan/Fem!Reader, could be seen as an OC. REQUEST: Unprompted. BLURB: After waking up at the base of a steep incline and nearly freezing to death, you stumble upon a group of strangers who swear up and down that they know you. WARNINGS: Some creative license for amnesia. Head injury. NOTE: I struggled a bit with this chapter on pacing, direction, and getting it to where I wanted it, so hopefully that’s not easily read. As always, thank you all for the feedback on my previous chapters, it’s been great to get such a warm reception for this story so far. TAG LIST: @on-my-way-to-erebor / @otherthingstoreid @ireallyhonestlydontcare​ @elanisha @darlingsdevil @cirillamylove @bunnyreese12

The next time you awoke, it was marginally warmer than the last couple days in the room you shared with Arthur.

A slow lift of your head and a glance around told you that it was well into the day with sunlight seen through the semi-broken window, Arthur’s cot empty. There hadn’t been much conversation after your meal last night. With at least a little bit of information on your situation and some questions starting to get answered, it allowed your mind to slow enough to sleep when your head wasn’t aching in pain. As you sat up, there was a sharp pain that appeared behind your eye below where the injury was, but it seemed to ebb out somewhat more than what it had been doing the days before.

Still, you knew you should be taking it somewhat easy for a while.

Rising up, you decided to do something other than hide out in the cramped room and stepped out into the main area of the building. The camp was quiet, knowing there was going to be a robbery of a train today so you figured you would be alone. However, Hosea remained behind, almost hunched over in the chair as he sat in front of the fireplace before straightening up slightly at your reappearance.

“It’s warmer today…” you commented, taking a glance around yourself a moment as he nodded slightly.

“It is. It’s good for us, means we can finally get outta here once all them return from that train.”

There was a touch of something to his tone, a bitterness, but you figured it was better that you left that alone. Even if you had gotten out of this with all your memories intact, you had a feeling maybe it wasn’t best to question or poke at the higher ups in the gang. At least...well, you really weren’t sure how they ran their gang. If there was room for question. Dutch was charismatic, headstrong, but he hadn’t done anything so far that suggested you couldn’t mention things to him. Hosea, too. Still, you just...didn’t know.

“How’re you feelin’?” Hosea asked, causing you to come back to the moment at the question.

“Better,” you stated with a soft nod, “My head hurts a little less.”

“Good. There was a lotta concern over that bump on your head.”

“Yeah, I...I could see that a bit in Arthur.”

Hosea nodded in understanding, gesturing toward the chair beside him. You paused for a moment before deciding to take his silent request, sitting yourself down in the chair before taking a moment to take in the heat from the fireplace.

“Told me a bit about that train, too,” you continued.

“Well, you always did have an interest in them. Wanted to go on nearly every one we got our hands on. Maybe once you’re better you can get back to that…” he trailed off at the look on your face, meeting his gaze like he was telling you some story you had been waiting to hear, “Or not, I suppose.”

“I just figured out last night that I was--am an outlaw, running with a group of outlaws. I shouldn’t be surprised, but any information on how I was before all this is something I can’t help but wonder about.”

“Of course, I don’t blame you,” Hosea replied.

“It’s just strange. I’m filled with uncertainty and a part of me feels bad because I know I’m not acting like myself, or at least the person people are expecting, as most people I’ve talked to seem to look at me like I’ve grown a second head.”

“You certainly aren’t acting like yourself,” Hosea confirmed, “Suppose we’ll just...have to see what happens. If we have to get used to this new you or just wait a while longer before you start soundin’ like yourself.”

You didn’t reply to that, looking away from him as you worried your lip between your teeth a moment in thought. He had a point. You could still talk, you had some idea on what you did and didn’t like, you had some memories. You weren’t a completely blank page just waiting for someone to fill. Yet, you still weren’t sure who you were, both past and present. You knew your name, your age, that you had a family somewhere. You had been told you were this outlaw, that you knew how to use a gun and liked to rob trains.

If that was who you were now, you had no idea. It raised the question of if...well, if Arthur had agreed to be in a relationship with the previous you, was it fair on either of you to continue it as it were?

“You don’t have to stay with us if you don’t want to,” Hosea said after your pause, causing you to glance back toward him, “I imagine Dutch’ll have somethin’ to say about that idea, but…”

“I really don’t know what I want, Mr. Matthews,” you muttered, earning a quick chuckle from him that almost dissolved into a cough.

“Haven’t heard you call me Mr. Matthews since you first joined us,” he commented, letting out a sigh as the light amusement seemed to falter somewhat. “Nobody’s forcin’ you to stay or go. Just...have you talked to Arthur about everythin’? What you’re wantin’ to do?”

“Not really. He answered some of my questions last night, but...that’s the hard question.”

“No doubt.”

“I can’t pretend…” you continued, “I can’t tell him the moments where I realized I...felt more for him than just a fellow gang member or pretend that I know what he’s like, why I decided to…”

“You’re gonna have to start over,” Hosea replied, “In a lot of places, I figure. You didn’t just know Arthur, myself, or Dutch. You might have to decide on if bein’ with him is right at the moment, if he’d be willin’ to start over with everythin’.”

“Would he?”

Hosea let out a short huff, “I can give you an idea but it’s best you ask him yourself.”

“Any information helps.”

“He’s always been fond of you in ways...never thought it would get to where it is with him now, but…”

“Is it...is it love?” The question put a pit in your stomach, a part of you really hoping it was ‘no’. However, Hosea let out another rough, wheezy chuckle as he shook his head.

“Now that’s somethin’ I really can’t answer for him.”

Despite the situation and the thought, you couldn’t help the slight pull upwards to your lips at his response. Yeah, that was fair.

“Thank you,” you stated, sincerity lingering in your tone. “For letting me ask strange questions and not putting a bullet in me a couple nights ago.”

“You remember that?” he asked, “Well, I came close. We’d just kidnapped that O’Driscoll, thought one of his buddies had wandered in after him.”

“...You kidnapped someone?”

“Not me personally,” Hosea muttered, “Would’ve been more focused on makin’ sure we had enough here to survive the snowstorm, but...well, that’s somethin’ better left for you to ask Dutch about. It’s a long story but O’Driscolls have been a thorn in our sides for years, and us them.”

“I feel I get more questions every time I get one answered…”

“It ain’t your concern right now,” Hosea stated, placing a hand on your shoulder before rising from his seat, “I would just focus on gettin’ ready to leave this place once all them get back.”

                                                           ***

You didn’t know how far out that train was, but it was another sleep before Dutch and company had come riding in with the pride of a successful job in his tone. Arthur was notably missing from this little parade, but the flurry of action that followed after was enough to push that observation to the back of your mind. It was early morning, but people didn’t waste much time on getting the wagons ready to head out to where they had decided their next camp would be.

Considering you weren’t even sure on where that was, it put a small twist of anxiety in your gut, but you had been allowed to be relatively hands off with the process with the weakness that still persisted from a mix of trying to heal your head and the lack of food. You weren’t the only injured person in camp at the moment, it seemed, as you had watched some people discussing what to do with a man named John and a woman, Sadie, who didn’t seem to be hurt but was definitely disturbed by something. Grimshaw, much as your first impression of her was rough around the edges, had seemed to get even more so under the pressure of getting the camp set up. You were getting used to hearing her ordering people around, though it wasn’t until some sunlight brought more heat that the snow and ice keeping the wagons in place were able to be removed.

You didn’t have anything to really pack, and being pushed aside from doing much in your condition for the moment, it left you feeling out of place and just waiting for something. Eventually, Grimshaw approached you in a bit of a huff, pausing to point toward a wagon that was being loaded up.

“We’re going to put you in with Mr. Marston,” she explained, leaving you to only nod along, much as you had no idea who she was talking about, “If he can keep awake for long enough, maybe the two of you can keep an eye on each other.”

“Is he the man who’s been laid out in that cot in the other room?” you asked, “I remember him from when I showed up here. If anything, I don’t think I’m that bad, but I can keep an eye on him for now if that helps.”

“Well, I appreciate that, miss, but as we needed it more in closing up camp…” she remarked, shifting to look toward your forehead a moment.

“Next time…” you muttered with an almost tense grin, though you found yourself almost flinching back when she reached out and gripped at your bandages.

However, upon feeling her just check the wound, you relaxed somewhat as she looked at it a moment before securing the bandage back to where it was.

“Well, at least Mr. Morgan has this wrapped properly so I don’t have to redo it for now…” she muttered, “That’s going to leave a nasty scar once it’s healed, but it’s lookin’ better.”

“Feels a little better,” you said with a small nod.

“Well, good,” she stated, “Go on, get ready. We have no time to be standin’ around for much longer.”

You weren’t too sure what exactly you had to gather and ready for the trip, but you wandered back into the building you had been staying in to gather up what you knew you at least had. Securing the weapon belt around your hips, you took a moment to remove the gun that had sat in the holster. Thankfully, you at least remembered the basics your uncle had taught you all those years ago, but anything else would have to be relearned. Though, upon further inspection, it appeared a couple shots had been taken in the round, a small frown settling in your expression. You stared at it a moment as if the sight would open something up in your mind, but after nothing seemed to surface you sighed and tucked the weapon back into the holster and made your way back outside.

John had already been loaded up into the wagon by the time you made it over there, climbing up into it before sitting down toward the back of it. You could hear some chatter around you, Grimshaw mostly with Dutch’s voice in and out.

“Well, ain’t you a sight.”

The voice came from behind you, near croaking but it caused you to glance back to see John’s head had tilted slightly toward you, peering out at you from the bandages around his face. You could see the ugly red gashes on his face that were closed haphazardly with stitching. Out of the two of you, it was clear he suffered more physically. Though, again, he was another stranger to add to the list of people who seemed to know you. For a moment you were about to go into the whole “I don’t know you, what happened?” piece that sat on your tongue, but it seemed to die a bit at the woozy state he seemed to be in.

“I’m not the one with the ruined face…” you commented, earning a quick huff from him as he lowered his head back down a bit.

“Ain’t always been anythin’ to look at,” he returned, almost a mutter over the noise around him.

“Guess we’ll have to see how things are once we’re both healed.”

“Mm…” It was a sound of agreement, but with how he seemed to nod off again after the words, you decided that was the conversation you would get for the ride to the new camp. You leaned yourself against the side of the wagon, listening to the people around you as you waited for things to start moving. Which, much as it was getting close to pressing on your patience, things eventually did.

There would still be some snow to get through, more trees and mountains to be seen as the wagon moved along and away from the camp. Away from the lands that held some familiarity to you, even vaguely in parts. Still, you allowed yourself to shut your eyes, knowing John was just passed out as the movement and eventually the warming weather allowed for some sleepiness to take hold.  

However, it really only felt like you had slept for a couple minutes before you were opening your eyes again to the sound of some ruckus, noticing the drastic change of scenery as the light glow of a setting sun cast onto the green grass and tall trees that surrounded you, a river nearby. You raised your head slightly, blinking against the heaviness behind your eyes as you noticed one of the further off wagons had stopped, catching sight of Arthur stepping off to seemingly check on something. Well, at least he seemed to be around. You hadn’t seen heads or tails of him for a day, but you figured you might have to get used to that. Glancing back toward John, who still appeared to be asleep, you situated yourself back down into the wagon and soaked in the heat for a minute, much as there still was a slight bite to it.

You couldn’t help but feel relieved to be out of the snow and cold, away from that terrible mountain and what happened on it.

                                                             ***

“Grimshaw suggested you might need some help?”

Less of a suggestion, really. A day and a half had passed since you had arrived at the new camp, your strength returning fairly quickly and Susan was also pretty quick to catch on to that. She wanted you to start helping out around camp again, something she claimed she had been fairly patient about. To her credit, she had been, much as you could catch the odd comment here and there. Approaching the camp’s cook had been her suggestion, his wagon thankfully already set up and hard to miss so you didn’t have to fumble around with the question on who he was. Still, despite that, he seemed somewhat surprised to see you standing before his table.

“I’m gonna need all the help I can get,” he started, “I’m out of supplies, I need someone to go into town.”

“Someone had mentioned I should check in with the doctor in town,” you commented, “I would gladly do it for you, but I don’t have a horse or much of a sense of direction out here.”

“Well, it’s good we got a wagon and plenty of riders around here,” he said in return, leaning over to look over your shoulder toward someone approaching, “Mr. Morgan!”

You let out a slow breath at the sound of approaching foot falls, not too sure where the pit in your stomach came from. There hadn’t been too much time to really talk with him, Hosea’s words still circling in your head but you still weren’t sure how to go about bringing it up. It would have to be, eventually, but you still didn’t quite have the words for it.

“What you want?” he asked, causing you to cast him a glance as he came to a stop beside you.

“I need someone to go to the general store in Valentine to pick up what I ordered here,” the cook explained, handing him some paper, “and since she’s saying she needs to visit the doctor, figure you two could do it.”

“Oh, so you’re callin’ the shots now?” Arthur asked, sarcasm heavy in his tone.

“No, but I am feeding you all. So, please…”

“It’s not a problem,” you said, shifting away from the table.

Really, you kind of wanted to get out of camp anyway, much as a part of you didn’t fully know where you all were while also still wanted to leave on your own for a while. You gingerly pressed a hand over your eye upon the small ache that appeared at the movement of your body, pulling a small sigh from you. Would be a while still with that, you supposed. Could have been worse, considering the injury, but it was still a bit of a pain to deal with. Outside of the obvious issue your memory presented, that is.

“You need a doctor?” Arthur asked after a moment, causing you to pause as he moved on ahead toward where one of the wagons was sitting.

“I need something for my head,” you explained, “Also, I think one of the women suggested doing so anyway, much as I trust you all in helping me.”

“Oh, nobody here’s a doctor,” Arthur returned, “much as we do well for ourselves.”

You let out a small sound of understanding from the back of your throat before waiting until the horses were ready, climbing up into the passenger seat with Arthur before heading down the trail through the trees and out of camp. Really, you couldn’t help but look around yourself at the cliffs and hills, the deer that would scatter off at the sound of approaching hooves. They had mentioned heading out east, somewhere you couldn’t recall ever heading out to. Your father and uncle liked to keep close to home out west, though...well, it was hard to tell if you had travelled anywhere else. Maybe not this far out east, but still. Somehow you had ran into these people, had stayed for a year or two apparently.

You really didn’t want to dwell on the fact that a couple years of your existence had just disappeared.

“I...hate to ask, but what’s the cook’s name?” you asked after a moment, Arthur glancing toward you with a slightly raised eyebrow.

“You two ain’t been introduced?” he asked, then seemed to realize the answer to his own question, “Ah, guess not. Dutch hasn’t been exactly loud an’ proud ‘bout what’s happened to you. Some people know but not everybody.”

“Neither am I.”

“His name’s Simon Pearson.”

“I’ll try to remember that,” you muttered, “So, what does he need?”

“Nothin’ special, I don’t think. Corn, some provisions…”

“He couldn’t get it himself?” Much as you appreciated the chance to get out, you couldn’t help but wonder why he couldn’t fill his own shopping list if it was that short.

“Oh, he certainly could, but he’s more at home hangin’ out in camp and butcherin’ what’s brought to him,” Arthur remarked around a small chuckle, “You used to avoid camp meals after a while. Used to get his feathers up.”

“Huh…” That stew you had back in the mountains wasn’t exactly the...best, but you figured it would change once there was a more ready supply of meat and things to cook with.

“You still ain’t remember much?”

You shook your head. “Hosea mentioned that I should probably treat this like I’m starting over, but...I don’t know, some things seem familiar but I can’t figure out why.”

“Familiar’s good news, I guess,” he offered with a small shrug. You could feel the addition to what you had talked with Hosea about sitting on the tip of your tongue, but you bit it back as you could see a small town appearing in the distance. That or perhaps you were a little unsure if you should agree to starting over or just...well, the alternative wasn’t really fair.

What the hell was fair in this situation? You had no idea. So, perhaps that is why you decided to leave that for another time. Hopefully soon, you could imagine Arthur’s probably going to start wondering.

Valentine wasn’t much to look at, “mud and morons” as Hosea had said, but you couldn’t help but take in the liveliness of the people around you a bit. Granted, perhaps it wasn’t much, but compared to the bareness of the mountains and different from the faces you had been getting used to seeing around camp. You took in the buildings as Arthur led the wagon next to what appeared to be the stable, dropping down from the wagon as you did the same. Much as you felt your clothes were still a little warm for the town, Valentine was cool enough to at least let you not worry about it too much for the moment.

There was a man standing at a table on the street for what appeared to be donations for some kind of charity, Arthur not really paying him much mind as he passed, leaving you to trail a bit behind him a moment as you watched the man coughing heavily into his arm. You watched him a moment as he lifted his head back up, a sinking feeling dropping down into the pit of your stomach as a quick feeling of recognition washed over you for a moment. There was a moment where Valentine had stilled and you were stuck with the feeling of your father’s hand gripping at your forearm, pulling you harshly into the house. You could remember glancing back to see a man and woman talking outside. Then they were gone behind a heavy door being slammed shut, your father’s voice ringing in your ears.

“She’s gone and married some softhearted farmer and suddenly thinks that gives her the right to tell me that I got no right to raise my own kid?”

He had changed drastically from what you could recall in your memory--frail, sickly, his eyes sunken and rimmed in red. You found some words rising to the tip of your tongue until reality seemed to shift back into focus with the touch of a hand to your elbow, making you flinch.

“Hey--calm down, it’s me. You ain’t heard me callin’ your name?”

You blinked up at Arthur for a moment before you shook your head slightly, swallowing down the tightness in your throat. You were pretty sure your uncle was standing on the street corner looking like he was slowly wandering toward death’s door, but...well, you weren’t too sure how to approach that situation in the moment.

“Just--yeah. I’m sorry,” you replied, Arthur dropping his hand as he glanced toward the man in question before he glanced back down at you.

“You becomin’ one of those givers to charity, now?” he asked, his tone teasing but it pulled a tension out of you that you couldn’t seem to explain in the moment.

“I’m going to the doctor,” you stated, “I’ll meet you out here when I’m done.”

[sid471]

Fate: Winx the Saga from someone who didn’t watch Winx Club

My friend made an actually GOOD post about this as someone who IS just a massive dork about Winx Club. So for a fans perspective here ya go :3 https://alric-usami.tumblr.com/post/641430679160340480/in-defense-of-fate-the-winx-saga show’im some love :3 Also unlike my friend this isn’t spoiler free. So, if you haven’t seen Fate and wanna give it a shot don’t read under the cut and if you didn’t watch Fate and you read it anyway... don’t get mad at me <_<

Now, if you’re still here, you’ve decided you don’t care about spoilers, you’ve seen the show, or haven’t seen the show and you’re stubborn <_<. Regardless, time for an opinion that doesn’t matter 😊. 

I watched all 6 episodes and gotta say that I... Actually really enjoyed it :3. I understand the complaints, the lack of diversity... kinda sucks. It’s 2021 c’mon now >_> but everything else I liked watching 😗 Though I DO wish Bloom being a Changeling was revealed later. Rather than... ya know.... the first episode. That being said, DID really like when she called her mom and dad the second time. It was a sweet moment ☺️. I’ll get more into that later :3

Now, let’s get into the nitty gritty shall we? :3

I didn’t have any expectations going in. I hadn’t seen Winx and all I knew about it, even as I write this, I got from the above mentioned friend. I knew nothing is my point lol. So, looking at it as a show rather than an adaptation, I REALLY enjoyed it. It had nice visuals, acting was solid all round, music was a little cliche at times but I still liked it 😗

SO as previously mentioned, Bloom is a changeling. And also like I said I wish that revelation had been made a little later, but I also like how the season went over all so... Hmm... Conflicted. Bloom’s turmoil after finding out the truth, I thought, was handled very well. I’m sure some people would say she like... was bitchy and closed off. Which she was 🤷🏻‍♂️ But fuckin... She’s 16 .-. Of course she’s gonna lash out >_> And also even if she WASN’T 16... She’s still finding out the people who raised her aren’t really her parents ._. Anyway, speaking of her parents, we don’t know her parents well, but I still liked them ^_^ They had a pretty good amount of sweet moments with Bloom. Like the aforementioned 2nd call scene. The one where she went back to her house and watched them? It was a very sweet talk and I loved it 🙂. Verdict: Bloom, and her parents, good 😗 :3

 Aisha, loved her and how her friendship with Bloom went ^_^. They had their rough spots, but at the end of the day they were still by each other’s side. And that’s what friendship’s about :3 Having their back even when you disagree with them 🙂 And even WHEN Bloom was being standoffish and secretive, Aisha made the effort to say “Hey. You can talk to me about anything. You know that right?” And you can tell it’s heartfelt and just ;-; ya know? :3 Though, admittedly, was a little iffy when she snitched to Farah but it worked out 😗. ALSO! Her protecting Bloom while she transformed? First of all, amazing sequence 😁 Second of all, that scene showed that even if Bloom is being reckless and, well, a main character lol, Aisha will have her back. And if you don’t have a best friend who’ll support you even when you’re acting like a Fantasy Main Character, what’s the point >_> Also side note, I LOVED that transformation sequence so much? I really like how they did it. I like that it didn’t... well... feel like a cartoon. Because like this ISN’T a cartoon. An over the top transformation LIKE an animation woulda been outta place and weird .-. Anyway, Verdict: We stan Aisha here :3

Terra. Oh Terra I just... Adore her ☺️ she’s so so so cute and sweet ^_^ She doesn’t deserve how Dane treated her >_> I’ll get to Dane in a little bit. But yeah Terra is just adorable. How can you NOT like her? She’s an adorable bad ass. Who doesn’t love an adorable bad ass :3 Verdict: Terra gets a million hugs from me :3

Stella. I’m not gonna lie, I was fully ready for Stella to be a stereotypical mean girl and was disappointed when it looked like that was the route they were going. But then they gave Stella ✨depth✨. Which we love to see ^_^. Stella surprised me with how much I ended up liking her. Stella was taught that negative emotions are all that matter in magic, which obviously isn’t true, but her mother is an arrogant bitch who only sees power >_> When Stella was telling Musa the story of how she blinded Ricki, she said that it was an accident and she didn’t mean to, but her mother thought it was better for her if everyone thought it was on purpose. Because “At least if it was on purpose, I wasn’t weak.”. So Queen Luna sucks <_< Which I know isn’t the case in the cartoon but in this she does. I actually like that they SHOWED that kind of strained relationship.

I saw it as kind of a foil to Bloom’s relationship with HER mother. Bloom and her mom had a somewhat negative relationship too, because Bloom wanted to stay inside and was pretty reclusive, mood, which her mom didn’t like so she tried to force her to go out. But the difference between Vanessa and Luna is that Vanessa DOES care about Bloom and listened to her. Luna, even when Stella TRIED to tell her a feat she considered great, blinding the Burned One, which IS great and awesome ^_^ But the Queen still wasn’t impressed. Verdict: Stella had a rocky start, but I love her now :3.... And Queen Luna... Not so much >_> She’s a bitch and not even like... a fun bitch <_< Although the revelation that because Luna and Stella are both Light fairies they can “control what people see” was not something I considered and it was REALLY cool.

Musa! I... Kinda resonated with Musa a lot actually. I may not have empathic powers that let me feel people’s emotions, but I know what she went through with her mom. My mom is still alive, thankfully, but she could’ve died from a stroke had I not acted. It was 2 years ago now, but I still think about what could’ve happened. And it’s noooot fun >_>. Anyway, back to Musa. Musa being an empath is something I really enjoyed. Honestly, I think I’d prefer empath!Musa over sound!Musa even if the latter is closer to canon. I just think Musa is an awesome character ^_^. I also loved how she steeled herself and helped Sam with the Burned One infection. That was honestly beautifully done. She may not be the most useful in a fight, but you don’t have to fight to be a bad bitch that’s what I say 😙. Verdict: Musa is a kin character :3

Beatrix. This bitch.... I adore her she’s so FUCKING cool! I love a good villain, if you’ve stumbled across my page before you know that lol, and Beatrix ticks everything I need to be character to add to my stan list. Watching her do her thing is like... It’s art ._. She fuckin EXPERTLY goes from Farah fangirl, to diligent student, to Riven’s girl, to ruthless villain and I LOVE that! I love a villain who’s both strong and smart :3 Especially if they’re female because I like bad bitches doing bad bitch things ^_^ Verdict, if it wasn’t clear: LOVE her. Amazing. Onto the Stan List she goes :3

Dane. *sigh* Dane... Is a character I have complicated feelings for >_>. I liked him a lot at first. I liked him and Terra’s friendship they were adorable :3 But then uh... Then Riven fucked him up <_< Listen man I agree Riven is hot but he ain’t worth hurting the first friend you ever made <_> Although a Riven, Dane, Beatrix throuple situation...... Is something I could get behind 👀. Because Dane likes both Riven and Beatrix, Riven likes Beatrix, and Beatrix... Is blatantly just using them but hey better to have 2 boyfriends who’ll do whatever you want than none 😊 Verdict: ... I liked him at first, thought him and Terra would be dorky friends, but then uh.... no >_> Terra deserves better <_<

Riven. Hate’im. Hate’im, hate’im, hate’im 🙄. He may be friends with the bi Dane but he REEKS... of homophobic jock energy. Of “I’m cool if you’re gay man just don’t hit on me dude.” vibes >_> Which like... I know seems ironic considering he literally flirted with Dane. But like... I dunno he just has so much homophobic energy it just... cancels out 😶. “But you JUST said you’d be okay with a Dane, Riven, Beatrix throuple” I did. And I still stand by that. But Riven would need some work before that <_< Like... an arc of him coming to terms with himself having feelings for both Dane AND Beatrix. y’know like that. I think it’d be cool. :3 Verdict: Riven sucks, but has a little bit 🤏 of potential. Also, all that being said, I don’t think Riven is REALLY a bad dude. I just think..... He wants Beatrix’s puss a little too much <_<

Sky. Sky... Is... Fine. He’s a fine character. I didn’t really feel a LOT for him. I just thought of him as Bloom’s love interest and like that’s it. Don’t get me wrong, he had some sad moments and I felt for him in those moments. But overall... Sky was just... fine. Verdict: He’s okay. I don’t really have a lotta feelings about him though.

Headmistress Farah Dowling. PHEW my feelings toward Farah... were a bit of a rollercoaster. I liked her, then I didn’t, then I was suspicious of her, then I liked her again, then she got her neck snapped.... soooo. But, that being said, I DO like Farah and I hope that she’s alive somehow in Season 2 :3. I like the variety in her powers. She has water, electricity, mind, maybe even fire, we love the variety ^_^ I was gonna say diversity but that’s kind of a sensitive word here. Verdict: Farah is an old baddie. And we love to see it 😗

Headmaster Silva. He... gives me Atlesian vibes >_>... I know fans of winx won’t know what I’m talking about, unless ya also watch RWBY. But with how he kept saying to Sky like “when you’re given orders you follow them without question.”, little hypocritical huh buddy, rubbed me the wrong way <_< Especially BECAUSE, yeah, it’s a little hypocritical when he didn’t follow his orders from Rosalind. Which I would also defy her orders, but then when YOU defy orders for the greater good, don’t then spread “Follow orders no matter what >_>”. Which, okay before you say it, I KNOW that he defied orders for the sake of saving the, seemingly innocent, people of Aster Dell, and they still died. But still... Spreading the follow orders no matter what thing is just kinda... an over correction, in my opinion at least. Verdict: Silva is... Okay. I like him... enough ya know? I like’im enough to hope he comes back to Alfea.

Rosalind. Rosalind... Is a villain with a lotta potential. I like her a lot so far. She’s obviously very powerful, and she seems... to wanna help Bloom? I mean for her own selfish gain of obtaining the Dragon Fire but still... A villain who partially wants to HELP the hero, is kinda interesting 😗 Also, I like how ruthless she can be. I knew she manipulative like straight from the memory that Bloom had. I immediately was like “I don’t trust this old lady >_>” But her levitating Farah and SNAPPING her neck... Oof. Chills. Verdict: I look forward to seeing where she goes :3

Final Conclusion: Fate: Winx the Saga, purely as a show, is very good in my opinion. whether you’ve watched Winx Club or not, I suggest giving it a try and going in with an opened mind. You may even find a new favorite show :3... Okay that may be pushing it lol. But it’s very good if you like fantasy, magic, and bad ass female characters 😗

[dangan-happy]

Kamukura Kamukura yas queen! To Miu Kaito and/or Kokichi. Yes, it's me again. Let's call me spider anon here though, just to make things easier xD. So, today I felt like absolute shit, and honestly feel like.. I'm not enough for everyone, like I'm a letdown. To be fair... I don't recall a time where I didn't at least slightly feel like this, but it's been getting worse lately. So, I'm supposed to be the smart kid right? Highest GPA in my grade, always turns shit in on time, ext, right? (1/2)

Its kinda... always been like that. Ever since kindergarten I have been that “beautiful blossom” with straight A's and a bad attitude, although the latter has gotten a LOT better since like, 6th. Thing is... alongside my other responsibilities, this causes a whole lotta stress. Gifted Kid Burnout as they call it, and I suffer from a lot of it, and the constant pressure of my mom almost Never Letting Me Get Below a 90, 90% of the time doesn't help, and I recently got an assignment (2/???) (Tw for s/h for this part.. I'm rlly sorry, I forgot to put this at the beginning of the post.) In science that was like "write a page-long essay in 3 class periods (about space, just noting that.)”. And being the perfectionist that I am, I went all out, but I found close to nothing on sources, and I had an episode, which has been more... common lately. Basically, I start biting my hand and hitting my legs and crying silently, in a "fit' of self-loathing, and usually nobody notices.. (3/4) Until like, today. This one girl noticed and tried to get me to stop but l.. pushed her away, as always. We made up shortly after but the teacher noticed too and she said she would give me an extension so I wouldn’t get more stressed but yet I'm more stressed anyways cuz I hate feeling like I can't do anything on time and this is the first time I've ever needed one tor school. I'm rlly sorry for bothering y'all with my rambles again, but I could use some advice and comfort rn -spider anon (4/4)

------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Spider anonymous, that’s a pretty fuckin’ cool name you want to go by. Alright, this is a pretty lengthy ask, not even gonna bullshit it.. Yanno, I’m the smartest person I know, but even I make mistakes here & there.. Living up to smartness…that’s not exactly how I would put it. Everyone is on different levels when you think about it, not all of us can be on the same wavelength.

Man, this really is a lot of shit that you’re going through, I can’t even imagine how you’re feeling.. Well after going through all of this, I do think that you can reach out for help, especially if you feel like the stress is getting to you more than ever.. It’s a really tricky situation, but if you need to talk to anyone, you have every right to do so.

A therapist can help you out, they can also help talk you on how to handle stress. How to reduce it so you won’t be feeling so shitty all the time, if that makes any sense. I’ll give you all the hugs you need babes, cuddles for comfort too..

Woah, ok, I'm gonna be real. I think this is the longest ask I've ever gotten, but that's ok! Alright, let's do this. Also, I love the name. Spider anon, spider anon, does whatever a spider can-on. Ok, gonna hit the pause button. You're not a letdown. No matter what you think or say, you're just not. I know what letdowns look like, like the original Sonic movie model, and you're not a let down in the least. 

Yeah, being the smart kid is a lot of pressure. I've never been a "beautiful blossom" but I can imagine it doesn't exactly make things better. Also side note, I'm glad the bad attitude part has gotten better, I'm proud of you bro! I definitely wouldn't call myself gifted, but dang, all of that sounds super harsh, and I'm sorry you have to go through that. Your mom's expectations seem to be really weighing on you, so maybe talk to her about that? 

YOU GOT AN ESSAY ABOUT SPACE?? Sorry, sorry I'm calm, I promise. Aw bro, I'm so sorry you got pushed to that. I get it, I'm a total perfectionist, at least when it comes to space stuff. It sounds like your stress is getting out of control, and if you're getting pushed this far, I'd try talking to a professional too. You don't deserve to hurt this much. (Also, if you need strong sources, look at NASA's websites). I'm glad someone noticed, even if you pushed her away. And I'm glad you made up, and got an extension too! Hey, it's ok. You're in a bad place right now, and it's perfectly ok for you to get some extra time on things. 

Seriously, I think the best thing to do is to talk to your parents, teachers, school counselors and a professional so you can get the help you need. This is some serious stuff. Any form of self harm is serious, and you don't deserve to go through this. You're not bothering at all! I'm happy you reached out to us at the least. I promise things are gonna be ok. I mean, they obviously aren't right now, but if you can reach out to people, I promise things can get better. You're not a letdown, you're an amazing, smart person who's just going through a time right now. I know you can get through it, just be brave and reach out. I 100% believe in you bro. You're amazing no matter what ok? I got your back when you need me, and you can do anything you put your mind to! Now get out there and do whatever a spider anon can-on! 

Hi Spider Anon!! Wow, yeah, that's long. Sooo, I'm gonna give you the best help I can!! Wow, smart kid, gifted kid, and beautiful blossom all in one?? Wow, I can almost feel the pressure from here!! I haven't ever been a beautiful blossom...I think, but yeah, I know about the other two. And it's never easy. For real, I'd talk to your mom about those expectations, because they're seriously stressing you out and leading you to some less than great coping strategies. Seriously, if it's impacting you this much, you gotta say something to her. Ew, papers. I hate those. I'm not a total perfectionist, but damn, you poor spider anon, I'm really sorry you got so stressed. I mean, this is obvious, but self harm is not the way to go. I get it, sometimes you can't help it. It's an addiction after all, so I one hundred and twenty five percent recommend you talk to a professional. That's your best bet for help with the self harm.

You shouldn't have to fight that fight alone, and there are people out there who can help. I get self loathing fits too. I don't do what you do, but I know how it feels in the moment. Hey, the good news is that someone noticed this time around!! It's ok, I push people away too. You made up though, and that takes a lot of bravery, so I'm proud of you ok! It's seriously ok if you need more time for this assignment. It's honestly a good thing since you're not in a great headspace. It seems like your teacher is open to helping too, so maybe try talking to them about everything you're going through. I think the key to making this better is to talk to people so they know how you're feeling. People will notice if you let them notice ok? 

Hey, no need to apologize!! Overall, my advice is to reach out to a professional. Maybe anxiety medication would help too, and I think talking to your mom about how her expectations make you feel would be good. You're seriously smart ok? Your grades don't define you as a person. You don't have to be perfect all the time. All you gotta be is your wonderful spider-anon self, and that's enough. So hang in there ok? You're amazing no matter what!!

[quinintheclouds]

Thoughts on Putting Others First: SvS Redux as they come to me

AN HOUR LONG?!?!?! Y E S THANK YOU

I am LOVING this opening art style. The way it shows all the things Thomas could say and shuts them each down, the silliness tying in perfectly to the video game setting, the way we could SO STRONGLY empathize with Thomas despite him not saying anything. Well done!

“Eff friends, Patton!” Patton and I made the exact same gasp and noise at the same time in reaction to that dsjfhljdhg

Lookit Thomas’ lil vest awww <3

ROMAN WITH THE PUNS I LOVE IT APPRECIATE HIM

rhymes

rhymes

they’re rhyming is this gonna be

A SONG!!!

(Logan off somewhere watching all of this: “You guys are doing a RAP? Without ME? .....Unacceptable”)

Seriously poor Logan being left out BOTH TIMES despite clearly having excellent points on the matter

But I’m loving this Patton/Roman dynamic being explored in this way. They have a lotta similarities but the differences are really standing OUT so far and I like it! Also it looks like Roman isn’t gonna just shut up and do whatever Patton says out of fear that he’s a bad person/bad for Thomas this time. I’m glad they’re both getting a chance to talk cause they aren’t exactly taken seriously a lot of the time.

RETURN OF THE BLINDFOLD METAPHOR followed by Roman saying “in Patton’s defense...” so they like, KNOW what Deceit meant about the blindfold? Were they playing dumb? Or do they just suddenly get it now that it’s coming from Thomas?

Ok this Feral Cat Story of Roman’s is too specific for me to dismiss and now I’m convinced either Remus brought a shitton of cats home one day and they just flooded their house/rooms, or Patton brought home a bunch of cats out of love and didn’t realize he couldn’t take care of em...either way that’s an adorable anecdote

The car jump line that Patton took literally is just making me miss Logan even more :(

I’m glad they’re giving context to the relationship between Thomas and Mary Lee & Lee! A lot of fander questions and opinions circled back to “well it depends how close they were” so it was smart of them to fill us in.

“those baby-makin’ catholics”

6:45 Patton has clearly thought through a lot of possible outcomes to talking to Lee and Mary Lee before going to the wedding... he never brought them up, even when Roman did and then Deceit did. But he’s bringing up points no one had addressed, and I think that’s a great way to put more intensity to Patton’s apology to Thomas for lying back in SvS pt 1. He hid a lot more than he let on. Man, how much guilt is this poor man feeling right now? :(

“Talking about it could have been harmful” I’m very intrigued by the parallels between Patton wanting to keep things from Thomas’ friends to protect their feelings in this episode and SvS, and Deceit disguised as Patton in CLBG trying to get Thomas to... keep things from his friend to protect their feelings...

WOAH “But was it worth it? I don’t--” “No.” Thomas cutting Roman off with that much certainty DAMN Thomas REGRETS going to the wedding HARD and also is agreeing with Roman finally??

Patton: “sometimes you can make all the good choices, and still not get the good ending.” Thomas: “I’m not even sure there was a good ending to get.” Roman: “Mmmm, I’m pretty sure there was.” There is so much to unpack here oh my gosh.

WOAH WOAH WOAH WHAT??? DAMN THOMAS CAME FOR PATTON WHAT ON EARTH??? Patton: “I think we can all agree that you are a good fellow.” Thomas: Can we? ALL? Agree on that?” Patton: *sputtering noises*

Poor Patton... I mean they’re right but gosh I feel for him. He wants so badly for Thomas to be a good person and he realizes now how strict and unyielding he’s been, and wants to not do that but doesn’t know how to be more lenient without sacrificing integrity cause that’s his JOB and he doesn’t know how to do it better aaaa this is such a mood

MUSIC IS THERE ANOTHER SONG COMING?

Return of the bagel. Except this time it’s Roman guessing/wanting the bagel and Patton being like “what? no?”

ok not a song but video game style is back!!

“ugh you’re such a dad” I love it

Patton just made more puns and Roman omg “Like, you’re SUCH a dad that like it’s too much to handle sometimes”

I am loving this whole scene jdfhjadshg Patton ily and I relate

Thomas and Roman teaching Patton how to come up with imaginary scenarios skjfklsjdfh

Sondheim wrecking Leslie Odom Jr is such a hilarious visual

Ok all three of them are peak dumbass and I’m so here for it (like they’re smart and all but they’re peak dumbass)

Daaaamn Patton is letting out so much this episode. Like he’s been holding back but wowie. R: “Just like how you didn’t HAVE to give him a hotdog” P: *sucks air through his teeth* “I feel like you kinda do though?” YES PLEASE let’s discuss the concept of obligation in morality again!!! Where’s Logan when you need him? Or Deceit even? (I feel like D’s gonna show up later but I wanna hear Logan’s thoughts this time too)

Patton: You can disagree! But... it’d kinda be wrong?

LOGAN POPUP! Ok fine if he isn’t in the ep at least he pops up in a lil dialogue box on screen. Also he popped up to support Patton... neat!

“It’s just me, Logan. I’ve taken this form because I didn’t want to be too...invasive.” POOR LOGAN NO YOU’RE NOT INVADING ANYTHING YOU HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO BE HERE! Also Roman getting scared by the popup while Patton just waves happily like he always does upon seeing Logan aww

Okay I am getting serious DOPAMINE from Logan talking. Like, he’s spittin’ FACTS. Something about the way he talks is so interesting and soothing and makes me so excited to LEARN. Roman mockingly mouthing ‘behoove’ had me snort though XD

LOGAN AND I WERE IN UNISON HELL YEAH! Patton was all like ooh you’re sharing your lil factoids! And Logan and I at the same time corrected, “Facts,” and proceeded to state the definition of factoids (we worded it differently but yeah as usual Logan is on my wavelength)

Logan’s sprite getting so disappointed at Thomas’ interruption joke jgdkjghks he looks so DONE

OML I LOVE LOGAN’S DIALOGUE BOX TALKING TOO FAST FOR THEM TO READ THIS IS SO ACCURATE

Oof Thomas finally feeling like he GETS it and Patton being like yeah but not if you’re doing it bc you want to feel  good tho... (also that’s the same argument Deceit made in SvS pt1??? I’m confused by Patton/Deceit’s functions lately and I’m very invested)

Oh ok Thomas just brought up that very point haha

“we all agreed the right thing to do was go to the wedding” um are u sure about that

“I was wrong” PATTON CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT?? I know Logan has the reputation of not being able to admit when he’s wrong (which isn’t true -- he doesn’t like to but he has done so countless times...well not literally countless but you understand my meaning), but Patton rarely is in a situation where he has to, so this is jarring in a hopefully good way. Istg if this is Deceit disguised as Patton again I’ll be so disappointed... I feel like the writers wouldn’t do that though

Patton: says smth deceit said. Roman: and you...agree? Patton: Definitely! I mean uh maybe? (WHAT IS HAPPENING INSIDE PATTON’S HEAD RN SO MUCH TURMOIL)

Roman: “I’m not an expert in the... moral medium” Thomas:  “Go ahead Roman, we wanna hear what you have to say.”  Patton: *halfhearted gestures and noises for roman to go ahead* jashfjdh he’s trying so hard

AWWWW they’re validating Roman so much I love it

“whomstsoever” ok I take it back roman’s not valid

I adore Logan’s popup fun facts, and him giving definitions for Roman’s vocabulary reminds me how much the two of them love writing and poetry and language aaaa

Patton trying not to be harsh is somehow 10x harsher than he normally is

oh wow that got real.

I know I’ve said this but I love logan’s insertions... but I do wish he got to say them out loud like earlier :/ Pausing to read them is less fun than hearing him talk.

oh wow that got real part 2

I want. So badly. To jump into this video and debate Patton on the nature of morality and what “the right thing is.” Roman you’re not being dumb, you’re bringing up excellent points and you’re valid again.

Oh no Patton... empathy is not morality... please please address that there are people who can’t experience empathy and choose to be moral and good

THE  TROLLEY PROBLEM HERE! WE! GO!

Logan’s popups bc he doesn’t want to “be too invasive” and making them optional to read hurts my heart :( He knows Patton, Roman, and Thomas aren’t reading any of it but he doesn’t want to be too much so he stays silent. Why?? Logan it’s okay! Why is this a thing now but not in the last 2 episodes? What happened to Logan :(

OOOOOOH Patton didn’t flip the switch :o Interesting! Daaaamn he’s arguing to let 5 people die rather than flip the switch so only one dies

LOGAN’S TEXTBOX WAS SO BIG AND FAST IT KNOCKED PATTON OVER I CANNOT BREATHE hang on I gotta read it

HE’S TALKING ABOUT DEONTOLOGY YES LOGAN THANK YOU FOR TELLING PATTON WHAT I PHYSICALLY CANNOT please tell me you’ll talk about utilitarianism and moral particularism next

Okay he used consequentialism but it’s close enough to utilitarianism that the outcome is the same. (Do you get it? Do you like my joke about how the outcome is most important? When we’re talking about-- oh you got it already? Good, moving on.)

DID ROMAN JUST FJCKING KILL LOGAN

“I’m okay, figment of your imagination, so.” Okay so CAN the Sides get hurt or can’t they?? Cause Patton clearly got bonked, roman got hit in the eye with paper and said ow, but logan got hit in the head with a throwing star and had his teeth ripped out and he was totally fine?

 Thomas is being so HONEST with himself so early in the episode, wow this is refreshing and I’m hype

AW YAY Patton called textbox Logan in to help with philosophy yay :’)

Logan: “Pity seems to be at the center of your idea of ‘putting good into the world’” first, Logan doing a voice impression of Nietzsche is GOLD, and second.... I wish they’d let him finish cause I was waiting for a “but” cause Logan siding with Nietzsche on this one feels... wrong? Like I could see Dee bringing it up or Logan using it in an argument only to continue with a contradicting philosophy but Logan equating empathy to pity... idk I thought he’d grown more than to think that :/ Actually I don’t think he ever saw it that way. It feels out of character but I’m guessing he had more to say to debunk that.

HOLY SHIT PATTON SKIPPED ALL THE REST OF LOGAN’S DIALOGUE AND YEETED HIM OFF THE SCREEN bruh he may have been right and he should’ve gotten to say it >:(

ROMAN ISTG DO NOT TRY AND MAKE THIS YOUR FAULT

I SAID DON’T

GODDAMMIT

sjfkdjgjsh okay aww Thomas good job, Patton too. Thank god they’re being nice to him

Patton is having a breakdown holy heckity about time

damn Patton is freaking HARSH

“I have a difference in opinion on this one, Patton” Thomas: *relieved sigh whisper* “ohhh thank you, Logan” YES APPRECIATE THE BOY YES YES I LOVE HIM why are they looking around like he isn’t making sense?

LOGAN YES! CALL HIM OUT! LET THOMAS VALUE HIMSELF AND PUT HIMSELF FIRST SOMETIMES! “Every point you’ve made in today’s discussion has contradicted that sentiment.” I love you but also you sound a lil like deceit... very lawyer-y and feels calculated like he’s been keeping notes for this purpose... I want deceit and logan to debate already damn it. Maybe it’s just that Logan’s inflections feel reminiscent of Deceit to show...something?

Ok can I just say that Logan gets so much rep for his strictness or high standards but he’s been SO GOOD about that lately and him teaching about the importance of leisure and self-care and freedom in your life and self-esteem and valuing yourself like you do with others... not even just this  video -- he’s been like this in the last few as well and these recent episodes remind me of early Logan (esp My Negative Emotions)  and that makes my heart so so happy.

Continuation of the above, compare this to how Logan acted in Why Bed? with regards to Roman. Roman advocated for leisure time and following dreams, while Logan had a schedule that optimized productivity and health. Now he’s taking a similar stance to Roman and asserting the importance of these things... WHY is so much of Logan’s character development OFFSCREEN?? I wanna know what made him switch on this! Maybe just cause he’s listening to roman from why bed?

Why is Logan being so abrasive? He sounds like his intent is more to disprove Patton rather than state what he actually thinks... not a fan of that but he’s not wrong

WOAH WOAH TOTAL PATTON BREAKDOWN WHAT HAPPENED WHAT THE FCK HE’S A LITERAL MONSTER IN THIS VIDEO GAME?

OH, MY GOD. If Logan didn’t step in and save them here this would have been catastrophic. I can feel my relief. I mean, he screamed, but it was a relief. WAIT IT WAS DECEIT THE WHOLE TIME??? Daaaamn good job on this one Deceit and I definitely like him more now but also WHERE IS LOGAN. Was it the whole time? That makes sense in hindsight and makes me feel better about some things he’s brought up but I feel like it really was Logan at the start, it wasn’t until he started calling out patton that his voice and inflection and stuff changed

Patton trying to attack Deceit   and hitting Thomas instead was  an EXCELLENT way to  showcase the effect SvS 1 and 2 are having

Deceit’s lil “A DUH DUH DUH DOY” looked and sounded just like Logan’s lmao don’t tell me it’s another switcheroo (I doubt it greatly lol)

REAL LOGAN REAL LOGAN REAL LOGAN

So wait what was the point that Deceit switched with Logan? Cause Logan’s saying “one more fact” so he was himself earlier right?

“Not that any of you care, but  I am unharmed.” Nooooo they care </3 “I will do you all a favor and spare you my company” okay OUCH

EFFECTIVE ALTRUISM YES aw he’s talking about him and patton working together yes thank you

Damn, Deceit is LOVING everything Logan says haha same

Logan and Deceit teaming up to teach Patton that it’s okay to care about yourself

DECEIT WHAT he’s being so supportive of Roman holy heck this is so genuine OH Roman’s arguing with it  this is a lot of stuff I didn’t expect roman to say out loud wow

THOMAS JUST SAID DECEIT THE CHARACTER ISN’T INHERENTLY UNETHICAL WOW this episode really said let’s make Deceit--

WAIT WOAH SORRY HIS NAME REVEAL!!! He’s Janice?? Is that true?

WAIT WOAH PART 2 BUT DECEIT JUST SAID IF IT WEREN’T FOR THE MUSTACHE HE WOULDN’T KNOW WHO THE EVIL TWIN IS BETWEEN ROMAN AND REMUS HOLY SHIT HE ACTUALLY LOOKED VULNERABLE AND THEN HURT AND THEN RIGHT BACK TO SNAKE

ROMAN’S GONE

fuck.... patton...roman....deceit....thomas....logan....I’m gonna go cry about all of them now

LESLIE ODOM JR IS HERE??????? oh there he goes

patton oh my god I love you  this ANGST are you trying to kill me?

Patton telling thomas he’s worthy of love I actually teared up

dfjdakjhfa deceit don’t push it

Wowie that was an EPISODE

[mercuriallycooperative]

Doom flags at her heels, Katarina really has a lot going on

(slight arc one spoilers, slight arc later spoilers, lotta long rambling thoughts)

So I’ve been keeping up with the manga for quite awhile and then remembered the light novels exist and then discovered the anime is existing and then realized “oh this is popular enough people are writing fic for it!” and then read a good fic and then I realized that this was a chance to articulate a thought that’s always in the back of my mind whenever I reread the manga and now that I’m watching like four let’s-watch youtubers as the anime goes on but like-

It has always struck me that like- as much as Katarina has a lot of sparkling happy fluffy moments and people she cares for a lot in this life, people that certainly I think she does love perhaps more deeply than even she realizes, and the audience is reminded so often "ha ha she still thinks she's doomed, she doesn't realize literally everyone has fallen in love with her and she's become crucial in their lives and hearts"- there’s also the other side of that-

That is that all the preparing she's been doing since she woke up with her past life memories at 8 years old- she's spent all that time running from a looming shadow at her back.

She's spent 7 years with a lot of excellent friends, capturing hearts and being a bright light in the world, but she's also spent all that time living with the fear that some of her friends might kill her, someday, or that she'll be made to leave them, or be discarded, and have to start a new life in a strange place for a third time- this time, alone. And she's been running from that all this time. Even for a slightly one-track mind with a bit of a blind spot for things too close to her, how much fear and worry do you have to be carrying, to be still as Concerned as we see her when she's 15, to keep up preparing for such a doom for 7 years?

And there are moments like when she’s visiting Sophia and is reminded of Acchan, that we see she does still have some wistfulness for her life-that-was. Heck, even when she’s fighting her way out of her magical coma thing. Wistfulness for the world that was. And she doesn’t seem to have spoken to anyone about any of this past-life stuff. Even if this is her world now- she lost a lot, when she died the first time.

Even if she’s usually more focused on either things right in front of her, or her looming doom (hardly an enviable distraction), that has to be a lot to bear and never breathe a word of. A lot to miss, and people she will likely never see again.

And of course she's considered very simple and direct and incapable of guile or scheming by even her dear beloved friends- and often times she is- but there is also is the fact that in 7 years she hasn't let on about the secret of her memories, or what she's preparing for, or what she's afraid of. She hasn't ever let on those fears of getting killed or exiled by people close to her, or the fact that all this preparing is just in case she has to leave them all forever. Just in case they make her have to leave them all forever. She does a lot of off-the-wall things, but nobody has ever gotten a real hint of what they're for. The most anyone has really gotten is a refrain of “just in case!”

(I went back to check- she's mentioned "In case I'm exiled," in some material. She has not mentioned "In case you exile me." There's something of a difference.)

Also like. I know she’s really memetically, uh, got a bit of a blind spot about how people feel about her (I’m pretty sure she just doesn’t care about the whole rules of society thing except when they make immediate trouble for her, which she’s in a position to mostly ignore- that’s less her lack of sense, I think, and more her contemporary sensibilities and a certain amount of unselfconsciousness coming just as much from not caring for some of the more implicit rules as it does not noticing them) (not that she doesn’t also have the sense of a single turnip sometimes, but like. still.).

But like, in the first episode’s worth of events, she has like three different head injuries, two of which result in unconsciousness, one of which results in getting a load of past life memories dumped into her head. It’s not unlikely that this happens, not frequently, but more than just the times we’ve seen, over the years. That can’t be good for her- especially because if she’s visibly fine there wouldn’t necessarily be any reason to apply any handy-but-rare healing light magic that could mitigate any medical repercussions of head injuries. Certainly, I would not be surprised if this affects her attention span or ability to put together some things, just a little.

Take that, along with the fact that given what we see at least about her parents in this life, pretty sure some of the obliviousness is genetic- and also the whole ‘preparing for her doom for seven years’ thing... When we’re afraid of stuff, our limbic system, our fight-or-flight-etc, goes all “yeet” in our brains and it does actually affect our ability to think things through. Like. We had a seminar at work about it and stuff. And constant stress, even constant low-level-mostly-in-the-background stress, is known to cause issues with both memory formation and retrieval. Which can’t be helping anything else happening here.

What I’m saying is, Katarina has a lot of actual potential physical reasons to have some of the really increasing amounts of obliviousness that sorta seem to show later in the light novels.

(Also, in fairness, some people just aren’t great with the subtext of the goings on around them, even if they can read the pattern fine in words on a page. I’m like that myself. Uh, not nearly as much as Katarina, given, as far as I know. But that’s a way that one can be, too, and it’s not mutually exclusive with the rest of this or anything.)

Aside from those- from what we get about her reflection on her life in the last world, it doesn’t seem like all of this is totally new to her character; I definitely feel like she was Like This last lifetime too. (Actually, yeah, went back to check, and in the light novel, in Acchan's chapter, Katarina was indeed Like This last time too.) But I think it’s possible that aside from new circumstances in this life accentuating these characteristics, that they’re the sort of thing that produces more, uh, pronounced reactions to situations, the bigger the situation is. Last life, she was a normal schoolgirl who didn’t expect anything life-threatening. This life, she’s been living in the shadow of her doom for 7 years, and she’s in the upper strata of Very Important People, With Harem Hijinks.

I think some of Katarina’s determination just really has this flavor of- “Well it just can’t be helped! I just gotta do the thing!” A sort of.... taking all the weight of the things that really are chasing her, and also some of the subtext-laden everything in a lot of her close relationships, and a little willfully going “well this is kind of a lot. you know what was also kind of a lot? preparing for my doom for 7 years! you know how I dealt with that? just getting on with it as best i can, blithely moving past all the things i wasn’t really equipped for, with twice as much energy as life threw at me!” Not consciously, necessarily, but there’s certainly an energy of eliding past the whole mass of situations down to the brass tacks of an action plan. Gonna get murderlyzed? Learn to fight back against being murderlyzed, with a sword! Lonely brother set to fall in love because of healing loneliness? Guess he’s not gonna be lonely anymore! I stole some relationship flags from people? Well they’re great folks, I’m sure they’ll be fine!

There’s a certain resilience to this particular response to the whole state of affairs that keeps the story of Katarina’s life in this world from being dragged down into the implications of all the little bits and troubles that come with both her getting isekai’d into doom flags, and also all her friends’ troubles in their youths. It’s part of what makes her so interesting, I think, that she’s able to just go along being herself, doing her rather erratic best, genuine, honest, loud and enthusiastic and kind, and producing very direct responses to the happenings around her. And people respond to that genuineness and directness and kindness.

Whether we’re reading it on the page or the characters are seeing it in person, I think there’s something very charming about that. Taking ‘wow this is a lot. life is... a lot.’ and getting down to ‘but being nice is simple, and being enthused is simple, and scowling at mean people is simple, and now it’s not as a lot anymore!’

The origins of Katarina’s directness and charm aside, in this life she has very much been rewarded for Being Like This. Here, I’m speaking a little more in response to how I’ve seen people getting exasperated at the increasingly pronounced amount of Bakarina-ness that I’ve seen so far in at least the translation of the later light novels that I got a chance to read; she’s... still quite oblivious.

But her life and the narrative has always rewarded that. Her good-natured kindness to people with sorrows has made her happy friends; her determination to go the direct and simple path through things has always cut to the heart of matters (even if she’s sometimes missed how she’s now rather at the heart of a lot of people now); her blithe disregard for a number of proprieties has been protected by both her noble parents who love her, rather a lot of overprotective friends, and her royal betrothed. Worry has only ever gotten her to an action plan and a drive to proceed with it; after she’s got those to work with (e.g. her “train in swords and magic to not be murderlyzed, keep Keith from being lonely, make a field to train in magic, make a romance novel friend” plans), she’s always had to learn to take her actions and then live her life pushing that worry out of the way.

If she’d drowned in worry about her doom instead of letting it propel her to action and then disregarding it in favor of living in the moments produced by her choices, then I don’t think her life since waking up with her old memories would have been as happy as it was.

(Actually, I have this theory that the ‘original’/no-memory Katarina was running in a similar way as our Katarina, only she responded to the worry with sharp eyes and teeth, instead of brushing it aside with a determined smile. But that’s an analysis for another time, possibly after more of the Verge of Destruction spinoff is out and I’ve reread it a bit more.)

So, all that being the case- why should she be less blithe about things? Why would she be more cautious? Why would she start worrying any more about things beyond her newly-lifted worries about her doom? Her determination to charge facefirst through situations with a good nature, direct problem-solving, and some slightly-suspect assumptions that have always been close enough to the heart of things before- that’s always seen her through.

(Also, like. After everything, when she’s finally, finally able to stop worrying about her doom flags- enjoying all the people and things she loves without digging into the bits and troublesome bobs of it all, getting in a sense a second new lease on life- she can be forgiven for wanting things to be as simple as she’s always tried to make her one most looming problem in the past.)

(Also also, she did have to go through the stages between “you’re all adorable but you’re all 8 and I’m like 16 and I literally cannot be attracted to you, that’s weird” and “well I guess you’re all the same age as me-in-this-life but a large part of me is still 16, so it’s still weird” and “I haven’t changed much over the years because living through the same years twice isn’t really growing up so much as it is being 16 for an extra year or four and then being 12 again and then 13 again and then 14 again and then 15 again and only then finally getting a chance to grow older than 16- and in the meanwhile wait shit now you’re all the same age as me for real. now you’re not just breathtakingly cute or beautiful like a freaking artwork, now you’re making my heart skip a beat, uhhhhhh”.

It’s not particularly surprising that after years of thinking “yeah but I’m older than you, you’re like 8″ that it’s going to take being blindsided multiple times for Katarina to get into the swing of “wait, you’re my age or older and now, suddenly you’re able to be hot. wtf.”)

I don’t really have a conclusion to all this, exactly.

Just that- Katarina may have the sense of a single turnip sometimes, albeit a very good-natured turnip, but while some of it is absolutely just How She Is Even At Peace, some of it’s most likely a response to quite a few environmental factors over the years. And her life has rewarded her for the type of resiliency that she’s used to face her doom flags- the doom flags she’s been politely carrying and deflecting the stress of for seven years.

Direct and simple and kind and uncomplicated in nature she may be- and a bit slow on the subtext sometimes- but Katarina Claes should not be mistaken for lacking in willful resolve where it counts, nor mistaken for lacking fears, nor mistaken for lacking in ability to plan and analyze. I’m pretty sure she just... concludes that kindness is best, people are good, and that this life and the people in it are worth it.

She’s got more to her than just ��oblivious harem protag is oblivious and really nice”. And honestly, I think if you look at her closely, she’s a lot more reasonable than people make her out to be.

[ukulelewrap]

Insomnia writing thing,,

(This was inspired by doki doki fallen angel, it's a rlly good ddlc mod, pls go play/watch it)

(This is also an au I made where Error is MC, Blue is Sayori, Dream is Yuri, Ink is Natsuki, and NM is Monika. So please don't get confused if any of the characters don't act like they usually do.)

Oof first time writing insomnia,,

"What the-"

Error heard some voices coming the literature club.

"Sound's like Dream and NM.."

He gently peered through the door.

"Brother, I'm sorry I-"

"I don't want your fucking apologizes.."

NM said hastly.

"I thought I was supposed the quiet and shy one, and you were supposed to be all happy and extroverted and kind and determined. But look where we are now.."

Dream stood there quietly.

He looked so nervous.

Error wished he could help him, but he didn't want to intervene and make the situation worse.

"You know, the literature club is a place where we share poems and talk about writing, not just read books. Maybe you should leave the literature club, and go join the book club. You'll find a lot more interest in that. You're honestly worthless here."

NM said firmly.

"Dear brother, what do you have to say about that?.."

"I- I.. I think you're a total bitch!"

Dream blurted out, his eye sockets widen.

"The reason I'm not so extroverted anymore is because I've grown up! And so have you! And I'm so happy that you've become more social, but there was a downfall to that growth. You've become a piece of shit that backtalks everybody! Remember when you called Blue an insensitive brat who only looks for attention?! Or when you called Ink a dumbass who is a monster that takes vials to feel shit?! Blue has depression because he's been dealing with a lotta stuff ever since he was young! You can't understand that because anything that doesn't apply or make sense to YOU is invalid! He doesn't have thick skin like you! That's why we shouldn't treat him so harshly. And Ink, the reason Ink is a so called dumbass is because he forgets thing easily, and can't understand real emotions! But that doesn't mean he's any less valid than us! So we should treat him like we would treat anybody else! I've also been writing poems! But I don't show them to you because I don't trust you!"

Dream yelled.

"WOW?... I NEVER EXPECTED MY BROTHER TO BE A LIAR.. AND PERFECT TIMING ERROR.. DID YOU HEAR EVERYTHING HE SAID?.. THAT'S GREAT, NOW YOU KNOW THE MONSTER THAT HE TRULY IS.. NOW, YOU KNOW HES A BAD PERSON.. AND WE CAN-"

Before NM could finsh, Dream stormed out of the room sobbing.

"Hehe! Sorry for that monster taking up most of our time-"

"Fuck you."

Error said firmly.

He then noticed Blue was in the room. However, he had his head down, and tears were pouring from his desk onto the floor.

Error could also hear Ink puking from outside the club room, he could also hear him crying a little.

"You went out of your way to show the worse side of him. You're own god damn brother."

"Well, I wouldn't be defending a monster. And I would support someone who was calling out one."

"Then why did you get mad when Dream did?"

NM stood there, in shocked and offended.

Error ram over to Blue, trying to comfort him. But nothing really worked.

Error then took out his phone, and wrote down a few phone numbers.

They were suicide prevention hotlines.

Blue look at the paper.

"T-Thank you.."

He said, taking out his phone and walking out of the classroom.

Error then ran over to Ink, who was crying on the benches.

"Go away.. Aren't I just some monster that uses vials to feel shit?!"

Ink said, looking away.

Error sat down next to Ink.

"Ink, we've only been friends for a few days.. But you have one of the most likeable personalities ever.. Why do you think you're so popular? And, if you ever need to talk, I'm always available.."

Error replied, giving a piece of paper to Ink.

It was his phone number.

Ink wiped away his tears, and smiled at him.

"Thanks! I'll call whenever I need you!"

Ink said joyfully.

Error smiled at him.

Now..

Dream...

Dream.. Was going to be a difficult one to comfort...

The things NM had said.. The side he had shown of himself..

He was probably so upset..

He turned back to Ink.

"Have you seen Dream?.."

Error asked.

"Well, I saw him run into the bathroom.. He looked really upset.."

Ink replied.

"Thank you.."

Error ran into the bathroom.

Only to see......

.........

....

----------------------

"KYAH!"

Dream yelped.

.......

Dream....

Was....

Cutting...

Himself....

"Error!!! It's not what it looks-"

Dream was cut off by Error hugging him.

"Dream.. Why?.."

Error asked.

"...Because.. NM is horrible... He's constantly rude to me.. About my obsessive side.. Whenever he gets mad.. He threatens to show everybody this side of me.. He also backtalks Blue and Ink, as you heard.. He says a lot of bad things about them.. But I can't go into detail.."

Dream sighed sadly.

"I don't care about your obsessive personality.. Because I still like you.. You're kind and caring.. And a great friend.."

Error replied.

Dream smiled sadly.

"I.. I'm sorry for not showing you this side of me earlier.."

"Don't apologize.. I know why you wanted to keep this side of you hidden.. You thought it was weird, and you thought you would be judge.. Don't worry though.. I won't expose this side of you to anybody.. I promise.."

Error smiled back at him.

Dream started tearing up.

"Thank you so much.."

He said.

"You're welcome.. Now, mind if I get a look at those cuts?.. I want to help.. So I need to see how bad the cuts are.."

"Of course.."

The end!~ <3

(Oof srry ending was rushed..)

[laylainalaska]

Torchwood audiodramas

I've listened to several more of the Big Finish Torchwood audiodramas over the last few weeks. I still think the first two I listened to (the Gareth David Lloyd-written ones, The Last Beacon and Dinner & a Show) are my favorites - see posts here and here - but I've really been enjoying (most of) the others as well. Here are my favorites and not-so-favorites of the next batch. Favorites Moving Target (Suzie) - I didn't expect to love the Suzie ones so much, but they're among the best of the bunch! I think it's partly that Indira Varma is terrific fun to listen to (she makes the best annoyed noises) but also that Suzie is so different from the other characters; she's very ruthless, driven, and isolated from her co-workers, and she has absolutely no compunctions about shoving people under the bus if she has to (quite literally, in one case). In this one, Suzie is on the run with a civilian who is being chased by alien hunters. It's part awkward buddy-movie and part action, very funny with some dark/sad moments and good character insights, and overall very enjoyable. Sync (Suzie) - I didn't enjoy this one as much as Moving Target, but it was still fun. It's essentially the same plot (Suzie on the run with an unwanted companion, in this case a "handcuffed together" type of situation) but I found the secondary character much less charming and the plot somewhat muddled, especially at the beginning. It was still fun, though, and I liked the end enough to redeem some of my less-favorite aspects of the rest of it. The Hope (Owen & Andy) - This is the second in a series of audios that teams them up (see review for the first one below, which I liked, but was way too dark for me to really love). This one, though, I thoroughly enjoyed. There's a pleasantly creepy, occasionally funny, very Stephen-King-esque plot involving Owen and Andy undercover in a prison, also featuring a serial killer and zombies, and it ended on a particularly lovely note that made me think I'd like to write a tag scene, which I almost never find myself compelled to do with tie-ins. Cascade (Tosh) - This was SO FUCKING CREEPY. But very good! Tosh is investigating a haunted torrent download that seems to be killing people, and the audio itself takes the form of a "corrupted download" that mixes up past and present and occasionally pleads with the listener to stop listening because everyone who listens to it dies. And Tosh is completely delightful. The Office of Never Was (Ianto) - This is really good and really entertaining, very funny in places, and also horribly bleak at the end, but, well, Torchwood. Ianto's dry, sarcastic narration is great. Didn't enjoy that much Corpse Day (Owen & Andy) - This is the first of the audios in which they work together, and actually is very good, but it is DARK AS FUCK. Like, imagine the darkest episode in the actual show, and then multiply it by 50x and a whole lotta trigger warnings. (See warnings under the readmore.) Unlike "Believe," I didn't hate it - the characters are actually in character and aren't responsible for the dark content, and it has a lot of neat moments, especially with Owen getting to be awesome and empathic and hero-y, but ... SO DARK. GOOD LORD. I enjoyed listening to it once, and will probably never want to listen to it again. Believe (entire team) - Okay, so this one ended up being a DNF. I'll get around to the rest of it eventually ... probably ... but I hated some of the plot. Jack is a giant asshole who lies to everyone, and there is a horribly squicky subplot involving Owen & Tosh. (See triggery spoiler warnings under the readmore.) The only part of the plot I did like was Ianto going undercover in a cult, but unfortunately that was also mixed up with the "Jack is a huge asshole who never tells his team anything" aspect. I mean, it's nice to hear the entire team interacting with each other but NOT LIKE THIS. Tropical Beach Sounds & Other Relaxing Seascapes - The concept (a haunted relaxation tape) is more compelling than the actual execution, which bored the heck out of me. Apparently I'm mainly in it to hear the characters' voices, and the third-party second-person POV combined with the extremely soporific narration style (I mean, it IS a relaxation tape, if a homicidal one) was really not my thing. So on the whole, a few of them have failed to land for me, but there have been a lot more hits than misses! And there are still a bunch I haven't listened to yet.

Spoilery trigger warnings for Corpse Day and Believe below:

(This isn’t a complete list of triggery content in the audios; these however are the ones where I felt it exceeded what you might reasonably expect from watching the show.)

Corpse Day: The plot involves a cult leader who abducts women, brainwashes/stockholms them into thinking and behaving as if they're his daughters, and conditions them to submit to being repeatedly raped by his adopted Weevil "son" in an attempt to produce interspecies incest babies, a process the women often don't survive. I saw a review of this on Tumblr that was basically "I never want to hear the word 'daddy' again" and I can see why.

Believe: Owen bullies and emotionally manipulates Tosh into having sex with someone they're surveilling to get information, overriding her repeated "no". Then she retaliates by leaving the mic open while she goes through with it, Owen is wildly jealous, and Tosh is almost killed because he stops listening and therefore isn't around to back her up when things go south. I hated every minute of it, to the point where I don't think I want to listen to anything else by this writer ever again if I can help it.

[dolphin-enthusiast]

“Hello! I do hope you don't mind sending this in here since it's very long but I was wondering if I may have a matchup from parts 1-5 if that's okay with you?(not sure if I've sent you a request before but yes-) 

I’m a 5”2 skinny but not too skinny, cis female who has ADHD, my personality type is INTP and my zodiac sign is Aquarius(actually it's pretty funny how my natal chart is Aquarius dominant) My hair is naturally black but I kinda dyed it and now its chestnut brown(at the roots and the lower portion of it looks like this blonde brown of the sorts bc I bleached it last year), basically what my tumblr icon shows. I’m very passionate about certain things like art or anything that basically gets me thinking and all. I draw a lot and though I don’t usually show it, I really care about my friends and loved ones despite being space brained and all. I’m very curious and willing to help my friends or loved ones out whenever the time arises.

I also play a couple few instruments as well; ukulele, piano, flute, bell lyre and acoustic guitar but I’m still learning and I sing as well. People think that I’m very smart but I’m not super smart considering that math happens to be my kryptonite. I used to do taekwondo and some track and field before but I don’t brush up on those anymore and I play Volleyball for fun and I'm terrible at dancing(the kind of dancing Narancia does.)I happen to do cosplay as well and I’m also a beginner witch who mainly uses tarot cards and I’m getting pretty good at it, at least! I also do some casual cooking from time to time but not always. I'm also learning italian as my third language!(Filipino is my native language, English is second)

I’m not a big fan of loud and over populated places because everything is just overwhelming for me since I’m an empath (but it's kinda ironic because I'm very hyper and probably loud with my close friends and I'm very expressive---I'm basically a walking contradiction lmao). So, at times and I’m always seen wearing my headphones or doodling away on my sketchpad or scrolling through my phone or playing games. I don’t usually talk about what goes on in my head but when I do, things are that bad. I happen to be that kind of friend who will either spoil you to death in any way I can or tease you but nothing too extreme. Some of my friends even think I’m very motherly/big sis figure, protective, chill, caring and wise, basically the ride or die kind of friend mixed with aesthetics, conspiracy theories and a whole lotta weird but still good! I also like memes and play some video games from time to time but I'm no super gamer.

I try to plan things before I do them, especially if it has the feelings of someone that I care about. I will admit, I have my downsides and dark side as well(willing to manipulate someone and exploit their weaknesses) but despite these, I can guarantee you that I won’t blabber about it to anyone unless you did something personal to me and my friends. I’m not very emotional because I have the tendency to run out of tears and my chest will feel heavy, the same goes for getting very frustrated as well because it usually ends up in tears. I rarely get angry, like blackout angry but when I do, things are that bad and despite said anger, I still try to calm myself despite feeling my knees starting to wobble but my thoughts are nowhere kind. Hope this helps at least! (Sorry for sending this here ;w;)”

Since you sent this via dm, I’ll answer it like this!

I match you with...

JOTARO! (Specifically 4taro)

You two would make a great match mainly because you share quite the similarities. Just like you he hates crowded places and doesn’t really speak his mind unless you’re 1. close to him and 2. the situation is more or less bad. He too enjoys things that makes him put his mind to work and wouldn’t be opposed to having a few good ol’ intellectual talks with you either. He doesn’t mind that you don’t show your true feelings too often because he totally understands you giving that he’s pretty similar when it comes to self expression, although his actions definitely always speak louder. Jotaro does also appreciate your empathetic side and your desire to help people out because he finds it to be both alluring and quite cute sometimes, not to mention that I have a slight feeling that you may or may not be able to read his feelings most of the times which would be pretty much ideal for him. However, you may wanna tone down your teasing and spoiling (or not) since, as stoic as he usually is, this man can and will blush and stumble over his words whenever you pull another one of your antics. But rest assured for he secretely does enjoy being spoiled and having someone else take care of him, and he will always return the favor anyway. Akin to you he isn’t too emotional but he’d definitely notice the early signs whenever you’d be getting angry and so Jotaro would do all in his power to try to calm you down.

He does find your hobbies to be interesting as well and would actually be highkey touched if you ever decided to play/sing something for him. He’d also be intrigued by your witchy self and would want to find out more about tarot cards giving that he’s a man of science who’s so very used to facts and evidence. He really wouldn’t mind finding out about stuff that aren’t “scientific” for once. Another thing that Jotaro would highkey love at you but would definitely be too shy to admit is the fact that you’re strong and know how to defend yourself. It’s both attractive and reassuring to him since he always stresses about protecting his loved ones to the best of his abilities and such. On his days off, Jotaro would totally attempt to cook new recipes alongside you because, while he isn’t near terrible in the kitchen, he has little time to practice on his cooking skills and would find it cute as fuck if you ever tried teaching him anything.

@x-infernhoes-x​

[nobodies-png]

I see some poor anon lost their best friend and I lost my mother just recently. May I request some hc's of how the organization members would (at least try to) comfort someone who has lost someone dear? It's okay tho if you don't want to ^^ - M

 awe, sorry to hear that, nonnie ! and sorry for replying to this one so late too, hope 2020 brings you a lotta joy and happiness ! 

Xemnas : 

A part of him can relate to that feeling, even if he doesn’t understand exactly why or how. Nonetheless, Xemnas would simply listen to every word you had to get out of your chest - but if none come out, he’ll gladly stay by your side in absolute comforting silence. Sometimes, peace and quiet to calm the mind can do more than endless words of encouragement. And he’d be too awkward to just go and give you a hug, so the only thing he can do is offer you his company, along with time and a safe space to get your thoughts and feelings in order.

Xigbar :

One would expect Xigbar to take you to some whacky adventures so you can distract yourself from those negative thoughts and feelings - but he’s also dealt with his fair share of loss and he’s found that facing the facts and coming to terms with them helps more than idle and mindless fun. Of course, it takes time to gather the courage and stability to do so - but if you ever need a reality check and some down to earth advice for something this serious, Xigbar’s your guy. Honor the past and cherish the good memories, but dont dwell so much on them. Don’t let them hold you back !

Xaldin : 

Hands down, Xaldin s u c k s at comforting people, specially as a Nobody and his complex relationship with f e e l i n g s. What is he supposed to say in these situations ? Hell, even giving you a pat on the back is hard for him. Like, is it okay for him to do so ? What if you start crying ? ? Because of this, he can only say he’s a good listener, maybe give you some general words of advice here and there. However, he wouldn’t be against cooking something for you - a nice warm meal followed by a good rest is usually what he does whenever he has a bad day. You’re even welcome to steal from the cookie jar and brag about it to Demyx and Axel.

Vexen :

As a scientist, it’s very easy for Vexen to detach himself from emotional situations and come up with a straightforward and cold reply to your loss. It’s the way he deals with things that require a heart, after all. Brain = good. Heart = confusing. Easy peasy. Of course, when he realizes that this method clearly doesn’t work and that you’re about to smack him, Vexen would feel a b i t guilty and offer to help in a different way. It’s very easy to let yourself go after losing someone and accidentally adapt some unhealthy habits - this is where he comes in, helping you make a schedule so you don’t end up oversleeping, skipping meals or avoid being active.

Lexaeus : 

Lexaeus is also a silent listener, it’s just kinda how he rolls. But unlike Xaldin who struggles with it, Lexaeus is good at comforting others without the need of words. Definitely one of the very few people in the organization that would hug and hold you for as long as you need, not caring if you stain his coat with tears. His aura and willingness to protect others can make anyone feel safe with him, so you’re in good hands. Lexaeus would even give you one of his little puzzle toys, in case he can’t be around. They might be small, but they sure help a lot to distract you for a while and remember that he’s got your back. 

Zexion :

Zexion might be emotionally constipated due to his status as a Nobody, but he’s no stranger to the negative emotions of the human psyche. If you reach out to him, he’d be willing to help - but you gotta keep in mind that he’s still a kid at heart and hasn’t found the proper way to cope and deal with his own feelings. Still, Zexion makes up for his lack of knowledge when it comes to comforting with his extense collection of books ! He’d recommend you things to read, both literature you two could discuss as a past time and articles about dealing with loss and grief. He’d also make use of his powers to create illusions you might enjoy if you’ve had a particulary rough day.

Saix : 

Saix doesn’t comfort, at least not so openly like other members. His approach is pretty much the aftermath of Vexen’s idea to give you a schedule - so long story short, Saix is the one who’d enforce and make sure you follow it. Which means he’s gonna be on your ass most of the time and as annoying as that might sound (Demyx feels so bad for you because of this) if you squint really really hard, you’ll notice that he does care about your wellbeing. “You have to keep on moving” he’d say, while sending you into your 6th mission of the day, which simply consists on taking care of a few heartless and some general recon. You’ll also find that most of your reports have been already filled out, but hey, don’t ask him.

Axel : 

Another awkward guy - Axel has trouble comforting friends, but damn if he’s not going to try. The way he speaks is more than enough to cheer you up, or at the very least give you back that passion you had prior your loss, it’s like he sparks a fire in you ! You just gotta go all out, ride all of this out and. Cry, scream, feel everything you gotta feel and then kick back with people you can trust, eat some ice cream with them. Allow yourself to be vulnerable and held. Axel would totally invite you to join him, Xion and Roxas to their whacky adventures around Twilight Town.

Demyx : 

Very obvious, but Demyx would encourage you write a song about it. It’s what he does to sort his feelings out, figure out what feels right in the end. And besides, learning how to play an instrument is always fun - you also got the best (and only) music teacher in the organization ! If that’s not your cup of tea, then you can try any other artistic outlet. Dancing, writing, etc etc. Demyx is fully aware that fortnite dancing at 3 am is not going to fix his problems, but it sure helps him stay grounded and remember that life is not as serious as we make it out to be.

Luxord : 

Luxord is very polite, so he won’t pry into your business - but the second he notices little changes in you like that permanent tired expression or the way you sigh a little too much on a daily basis, he’d invite you over for tea, subtly give you an excuse to talk to him and vent should you need it without being too invasive or forward. If you still can’t or refuse to open up, Luxord would take you for a walk around Wonderland or another colorful and fun world, giving you some advice in the form of his cryptid ramblings. When a door closes, another opens - and if there aren’t any, then you just have to open a window, get some fresh air and a new perspective.

Marluxia :

Marluxia can also relate to that. Surprisingly, he’d be very gentle, asking if you’d like to share some happy memories you have with that someone. Maybe even set up a small makeshift “shrine” in their honour, of course covered with their favorite flowers. He’s just happy to help you, listening to you reminisce and remember them with a smile on your face. It’s very shocking to see this side of him, given how flamboyant and eccentric he can be - but those passing encouraging smiles Marluxia gives you whenever he sees you are a great comfort.

Larxene :

Larxene is… Not the best choice if you want to be comforted. Her method is an extreme version of Xigbar’s, she’ll simply offer a quick “deal with it” and a hard “grow up and accept it”. While she might be impulsive and very emotional Larxene is actually a very logical person with a good understanding of her own feelings. What you can learn from her is that everyone needs to ultimately find their own way of coping and dealing with grief, no one else can tell you how or when to feel a certain way no matter how good their intentions might be. Take the good advice, but don’t depend on others for everything. Your way might be unconventional, but as long as it’s not hamrful for yourself and you’re aware of your limits, it’s good enough.

Roxas :

Roxas doesn’t know what to do, at all. So he’d simply ask about what YOU want to do now. How would you like to deal with these feelings and such. He’ll be there right next to you, even if you just wanna cry and sleep it off or if you want to distract yourself and never speak about it. Roxas is there, holding your hand all the way and making sure you know you’re not alone. Like Marluxia, he might also ask about the person you lost, just out of curiosity. And then maybe internally facepalm because oh shit, what if you don’t want to talk about it. The way Roxas worries about you, stuttering apologies and awkwardly explaining that he simply wants to make you feel better is so endearing that you can’t help but feel safe and sound.

Xion :

Xion would simply take you to Destiny Islands, to watch the waves, feel the sand and the sun on your skin. She wouldn’t ask at all, instead explaining that this is the place she goes to whenever she’s feeling confused, lost or just a little under the weather - and now, she wants to share this with you. You don’t have to say a thing, Xion doesn’t need to know your pain to realize that you just need a friend and a shoulder to cry on. Someone to rely on. The two of you would just spend the afternoon picking up seashells, exploring the island and relaxing. She’ll gladly listen if you have anything to say, but it’s okay, you’ve done enough. Let her take care of you now.