#there were only two beds
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You've heard of There Was Only One Bed, now get ready for: There Were Only Two Beds!
3zun stop at an inn for the night after a night hunt. There's one room available, but it only has two beds. (And, to avoid the easy solution, the room is too small and cramped for anyone to sleep on the floor. Jin Guangyao could maybe fit in the gap between the beds but it would be hell on his old injuries and the other two know it.) Who shares with whom? Who sleeps alone? How do they decide?
Some possibilities I considered while trying to fall asleep:
NMJ and LXC share, JGY sleeps alone
——NMJ suggested it because he doesn’t trust JGY. He doesn’t say it in so many words, but JGY knows 😢
——LXC suggested it because he’s worried about JGY’s reputation. No-one would dare make an issue of Zewu-jun and Chifeng-zun sharing a bed, but being caught in bed with either of his sworn brothers could ruin JGY.
——JGY suggested it because his sworn brothers are pure and righteous and he is the son of a prostitute. Obviously they wouldn’t want to dirty themselves being so close to him if there's another option. He'll be the one to make the suggestion so he doesn’t have to hear either of them say it out loud.
NMJ and JGY share, LXC sleeps alone
——NMJ suggested it because he saw the look on JGY’s face and had to make sure JGY knows that NMJ doesn’t think he’s dirty.
——LXC suggested it because of his ongoing quest to matchmake Nieyao into reconciling. He's sure that a little forced intimacy can only improve their relationship!
——JGY suggested it because he wants to show er-ge that he is trying to fix things and it’s da-ge who’s being unreasonable. He assumed NMJ would refuse and earn himself a disapproving look from LXC. He has no idea what to do with himself when NMJ just goes “Yeah, OK” and gets into bed with him.
LXC and JGY share, NMJ sleeps alone
——NMJ suggested it because LXC and JGY are both smaller than he is and will fit more comfortably in one of these cramped little beds. He has no feelings whatsoever about the prospect of sharing a bed with either of them, it's just practical.
——LXC suggested it because he assumes NMJ would refuse to consider sharing with JGY and he doesn’t want a fight.
——JGY suggested it because he’s scared of NMJ. He doesn’t say it in so many words, but NMJ knows 😢
Someone figures that opportunities like this don’t come along every day and volunteers to share with whoever he thinks he has the most sexual/romantic tension with. It might be his only chance to share his beloved’s bed! Unfortunately, it’s not as romantic or as sexy as he hoped, not least because he can’t stop thinking about the other guy just a couple of feet away...
Someone doesn’t want this to be weird and volunteers to share with whoever he thinks he has the least sexual/romantic tension with. Turns out he’s mistaken about that. By the end of the night he has to confront the realisation that he’s in love with both of his sworn brothers.
Someone wants to share because he’s noticed there’s a ton of sexual/romantic tension between the other two. They’re not gonna be consummating that shit tonight if he has anything to say about it! He’s so busy worrying about his sworn brothers getting together and leaving him behind that he doesn’t notice the “😍Of course I’ll sleep with you!” and “😏You two have fun” reactions.
Someone volunteers to sleep alone because he’s noticed there’s a ton of sexual/romantic tension between the other two and he is nobly stepping aside. He won’t stand in the way of true love. The other two are like “Why’s he so eager to sleep alone? Doesn’t he love us?🥺”
Two people offer to share because they’ve done it before and it wasn’t a big deal (Nielan when they were kids, Xiyao when they were on the run, or Nieyao when they were in the army). The other person spends the whole night tormented by sexy, sexy visions of what might have happened between his sworn brothers on the multiple(!) nights they’ve spent in bed together.
The person who’s sleeping alone is jealous and horny and agonising over all the sex he might be missing out on right now.
The person who’s sleeping alone can hear the other two breathing, and he knows they’re fast asleep. He’s cold and lonely and tormented by soft, cosy visions of all the cuddles he’s definitely missing out on right now.
Somehow, they make it through the night.
The next time they have to spend the night at an inn together, the proprietor says “We have two rooms available. One has two beds, and the other has one bed.”
3zun, remembering this night, say “We’ll take the room with one bed.”
“No, that’s not … You don’t have to choose between them. You can take both rooms.”
“WE. WILL. TAKE. THE ROOM. WITH ONE BED.”
#3zun#not!fic#there were only two beds#there's like a 0-20% chance i end up writing this someday#but if anyone else wants to take a shot#please do!#i typed up all the html for a bullet list with inedented sublists#and it didn't even work#excuse the formatting nonsense
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i think you guys are onto smth..
i unironically got invested in this HELP
#WHERES THE FIC AT IF SOMEONE WRITES THIS I WILL PAY THEM A HUNDRED DOLLARS😭😭#kunikida serving the country while dazai's serving cunt😔#dazai was born to malewife but forced to manipulate and i think that's the greatest tragedy of bsd#anyway some facts i would like to share abt this au thay i came up w while drawing!!#takes place in 1939 (start of wwii) and there was a mandatory draft that required one male over eighteen from each house to serve#both of them are still twenty two and had been engaged for abt two years before getting married that year#newlyweds! unfortunately kuni had to go fight and they were seperated :(#before the war kunikida was a math teacher at the local high school and dazai obviously managed the household and didn't work#he's hopeless at cooking and meal prep even w recipie books so they either get those prepackaged meals or kuni makes dinner when he gets ba#so like when he's making lunch for kunikida he normally just packs a basic sandwich w raw fruit#kunikida always appreciates the effort even tho hes probably sick of having the same thing everyday but he won't complain abt it#when kunikida joined the army he was relieved that the mess hall had better food than dazai#he was the only one in his platoon that never complained abt the food so his fellow soldiers assumed it was bc he came from a tough bg#when in reality he was just used to being poisoned on a daily basis from his dumbass husbands cooking and was hardly fazed from army ration#they write to each other although its more dazai sending and kuni receiving bc hes off fighting and doesnt have time to write back#dazai talks abt life on the homefront and how he has to grow a victory garden (everything is DYING HE CANT EVEN RAISE TOMATOES)#and kuni writes abt his fellow soldiers and how the war is going and when he thinks he'll be home and how he misses sleeping in a bed#ANYWAY yea thought i'd share sry for infodumping in the tags again#this post is for like the four ppl that care abt this specific flavor of knkdz so hopefully this gets four notes at least#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#dazai osamu#osamu dazai#kunikida doppo#doppo kunikida#kunikidazai#knkdz#lotus draws#bro sry for posting at two in the morning i couldnt sleep until i got this out of my head they have infested my brain
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Better luck next time, Draco
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Plot twist, Sokka and Zuko actually get together because there’s a spider in Sokka’s room so he absolutely can not go back in there now, the whole room needs to be burnt down. Now he has to sleep in Zuko’s room. With him. In his bed even. There is no other option.
There absolutely are other options
#Zuko wakes up ready to kill somebody in the dead of night because he hears Sokka screaming like an axe murderer had come to end him#there might not have been an axe murderer coming to kill sokka but Zuko will definitely finish the job if the screaming continues#there was only one bed trope but there actually are two beds#one is just infected by a spider#sokka was so terrified of creepy crawlers in canon he has to be the biggest arachnophobe#broadcasted live from the floor in my dining room where I have been sleeping because there were too many bugs in my bedroom#gotta cope some how#*projection*#zukka#sokka#zuko#atla#sokka x zuko#zuko x sokka#my post#headcanons and stuff#zukka headcanons
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It's crazy how people talk about loumand like they hate each other and have never once looked at each other with anything resembling lust, like two nuns at a silent covent. Buddy louis has had bed death with his husband, and that husband wasn't armand lemme tell you that!
#like out of the 30 years loustat was canonically together in the show.#louis literally says they were only having sex for like 13 years at most!!!#from 1911 to when claudia kills charlie so about 1923 then that weird ass coercive sex from 1937 to 1940 when lestat gets murked#they was not fuckin fr!#meanwhile loumand fucked in front of daniel on two separate occasions. had a crazyinsane psychosexual rp for 7 episodes#and people say theyre experiencing bed death. who died? not blasia!#people just dont wanna see blasia winning over halfrica cus then theyd have to care about people of color fr#instead of projecting onto and woobyfying lestat#iwtv#interview with the vampire#louis de pointe du lac#amc iwtv#iwtv 2022#armand iwtv#armand#ldpdl#lestat de lioncourt#loumand#i did the math and technically loustat had sex for around 15 years but i cant edit my other tag#i also forgot the bed death and affair in 1916-1917 so i was close but no cigar#all that to say loustat werent real fuckers.#and i love loustat. they just werent real fuckers
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I AM FOREVER YOUR MOST DEVOTED BELIEVER
kenny ortgea, descendants 3 / katy prickett, medieval 'love motto' gold ring found near frinton / x / x / x / 墨香铜臭, heaven official's blessing / mitski, geyser / dove cameron and khalid, we go down together / mitski, i'm your man / anne sexton, 'a letter to w. d. snodgrass' / x / florence + the machine, heavy in your arms / x
#descendants#descendants 3#jal#what the FUCK is going on with these two in d3#like you watch d2 and youre like ohhh ok so something IS seriously wrong with them#and then d3 comes with the steel chair#jay bowing to mal lower than anyone else.#using actual titles instead of silly ones like carlos does.#and mal only being able to act on jay's word......#what in the codependency#like why is jay soooo distraught at the ember being put out when no one else is. so much so that they CUT TO HIS FACE#and no one elses#and mal knowing jay will throw her a sword and catching it with ease#how many times have they done that.....#my og tags were longer but i need to go to bed soon bc i need to wake up early. and i have already spent too long on this damn weave#i may elaborate later hehe#jay son of jafar#mal bertha#descendants web weaving
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Father Mulcahy being a spin the bottle champion is something that's so important to me actually.
#He def got drunk and somehow convinced everyone else at the 4077th to play and then rigged it so he could kiss Hawkeye#Except everyone else kept leaving the game until he and Hawk were the only two playing but Francis was so drunk that he didn't notice#But it didn't really matter bc Hawk was the only one he wanted to kiss anyway#Hawk can take his alcohol way better though and he actually cares about Mulcahy so he probs told him no and just put him to bed#Maybe in the Swamp so he could keep and eye on him#Or maybe he took Francis back to his own tent but Francis just grabbed onto him and wouldn't let go and then immediately fell asleep so#Hawk couldn't escape#Which could go one of several ways in the morning#Depending on things like whether Hawk managed to extract himself or not and how much Mulchay remembers#I'd like to think it ended happily for them though#I'm def thinking too much into this but he just sounded so proud of his spin the bottle skills and it was adorable#I love him#Father Mulcahy#MASH#S10E11: Follies of the Living Concerns of the Dead#This is all Alan Alda's fault how dare he write and direct things (which inevitably all make me go insane)#Hawkahy
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In his 1839 travelogue Diary in America, Captain Frederick Marryat described the crowded and rustic hotels that a traveller in the United States could expect at this time, especially in remote areas far from cities and large towns. Rooms might include "three or four other beds," most of them with two people in each bed. Then, he shares an anecdote about an American friend:
A New York friend of mine travelling in an Extra with his family, told me that at a western inn he had particularly requested that he might not have a bed-fellow, and was promised that he should not. On his retiring, he found his bed already occupied, and he went down to the landlady, and expostulated. “Well,” replied she, “it’s only your own driver; I thought you wouldn’t mind him.”
A fascinating look at the attitudes around male bed-sharing in 1830s America, and an underutilized historically accurate take on "there was only one bed"! Imagine your OTP: forced to share a bed by the landlady.
#frederick marryat#diary in america#1830s#and there was only one bed#19th century#victorian#social history#masculinity#tbh it's interesting that the landlady assumed two men of very different classes would share a bed#and they were bed-fellows
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An AWS comic
#My art#For the record I am not a medical professional and as far as I know AWS isn't even something you can be diagnosed with???#It's so hard to describe what the two sensory hallucinations really *FEEL* like#Like the time one... You know how a dramatic slow motion scene looks like in an anime?#It's like that but if you made it a 60 fps interpolated version of it#It is an absolutely bizarre feeling#Meanwhile the hyper awareness and everything feeling intense feels like how a fisheye lens shot in an anime feels#No I could not be bothered to try to figure out how to draw that for this comic#For the record I haven't actually had those visual hallucinations since I was a small small child#Hell I don't even think I had any hallucinations in my teens at all like#The sensory ones just kinda started happening again in the past 7 years or so?#Also the swelling sensation I've only had once so far. Usually I get the hyper awareness sensation#(Also sometimes I get this intense feeling of swaying when I go to bed but that might not be an AWS thing??)#(Like there's other things that could make you feel like you're rocking on a boat when laying down so I didn't include that)#No I have never talked to anyone about these hallucinations because for the longest time I didn't know what they were#And they are like. Harmless. Like I'm 100% aware they're just strange sensations but not real at all#They last max 15 minutes if even that long and they happen like super rarely#Only once have I had the hyper awareness be SO INTENSE it made me feel distressed#So like. It doesn't really affect my life at all? So why bother with it?#Also IDK if I could even go to a doctor and ask about AWS and have them know what that even is#And even if I could as far as I know there is no treatment for it so like. Whatever#As long as I don't start having distressing hallucinations or visual hallucination's I'll be fiiiiiine
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what if i put my life in your hands?
what if i took your life in mine?
#okay look there's a reason i've been obsessed with this scene for 21 slutty slutty years#imagine for a second you're yue#your master—whom you loved more than your own existence—decided his work was finished and didn't need you anymore#and he pushed you into the dark where you slept for centuries until a little girl woke you up by sheer dumb luck#you now are trapped in this horrible new era where everything is too loud and too fast and too bright#you're also trapped in a body that isn't yours jockeying for room with a completely separate soul that you don't know or particularly like#and you're draining your meager stores of magic to the dregs in order to keep the two of you alive#under the surface of tsukishiro yukito you're drowning—and the both of you are fading away entirely#and then this boy#pulls you to the surface of yourself#and says with his whole heart 'i won't let you disappear'#he smiles at you and teases you and then pours his not inconsiderable power into you#and you take and you take and you take and he never says stop#he never says only a little but no more#he holds you close and lets you sup on the very marrow of his magic until there's nothing left and he's simply an ordinary human#and for the first time in centuries—perhaps ever—you feel full#when you finally step away and ease his unconscious body onto the bed as gently as you can manage#you murmur that you ought to thank him#but it's such an inadequate way to convey your gratitude#how do you give thanks for what you've made him lose?#you put your life in his hands and he cradled it as if it were precious... and then he gave you his own in return#in the world before this one you would have been as good as wed#you thumb the swell of his cheek and allow yourself one last look at your would-be husband#and then turn around to face the threat behind the door#as it creaks open to reveal a little body wracked with sobs you think you would face anything that would dare come for him or his sister#not because it is your duty as the guardian of the cards#but because you love them#touya/yue#ccs#yue
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matt murray gets his first career NHL shutout! — DAL vs MIN — 01.08.24
#hockey#stars#dallas stars#matt murray#okay i know i normally tag everyone because if i pick & choose i feel like a child kicking only one stuffed animal off the bed#but if i tagged everyone here i'd only be missing four guys from the roster & two of those four are miro and otter. so. alskjdhgf.#so INSTEAD in the tags i will rank my favorite matt murray's first nhl shutout headbops in a order of appearance#love that jani was the first guy to him like of COURSE#harls & daddy were both SO tender w it but only harls whispered sweet nothings so he gets a little bit of a leg up there#wedgie & mush were sweet with it like always#loved seeing robo tower over the goalie in the goalie bops. i think he's a little taller than wedge but he looks Tall tall next to murrs#and then pavs!!#long post //#z:edit
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guys i'd forgotten what yapping w someone who u know irl who truly gets u and u don't feel nervous around and doesn't make u feel like shit for js existing is like wow ‼️‼️‼️ life is so good guys 💞💞💞💞
#౨ৎ hannah yaps#i reached out to an ex best friend who left our school this year#we had a friendshio breakip like four yrs ago tho and it's js awks and we didn't rlly talk but there wasb't any bad feelings iykwim#anyways i reached out and she replied and then we js started talking and all of a sudden we were sending voice nites and yapping tgt and ca#-ching up and it js fell back into like how things used to be udk its like nothing had ever happened#and anyways we got to talkijg abt billie and i asked if she git tickets and she said yeah#and i was like no way and she was like i have two fir barcdlona and 2 for dubkin im going w my friend to barca but i dont have anyine to go#with for dublin and she was like oh i should js take uas a joke (i think?) and i was like no litetally do and then we carried on#talking and dhe brought it up again and i was like i would love to but obvs dont decide rn and im nkt tryna force u or anything obvs#bc i didnt wanna give off the wrong impression yk like obvs i would love to go but we only started talking properly again tiday yk#anf she was like no yea ik but nearer to the time if we're stilll close then yes#and yeah so 😁😁 but aside from that it was js the best we talked for 4 hrs straight 😋#and i never felt like insecure or wtv or was like carefully thinking thru my replies it was so idk freeing? does that make snese?#and then she had ti go to bed but she was like spam me if uwant and i'll look in the morning so i was like okay 😁😁😁#and i sent like a million voice notes of me singing dif billie eilish songs (badly obviously) theyre so funny#but yeah so glad i deciddd to reach out ☺️💗
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I'm so fucked
#ramblings with major#cursing#trying to fix my sleep schedule so i can be on time at work when i have to show up ~6 hours before the store opens#meaning at least 6 hours before i usually get up on early days#and im still struggling to wake up#it doesnt help that i close the night before and if i were to pass out the moment i get home and wake up with Maybe enough time to get ready#id still only get 7 hours of sleep. so with dinner. showering. getting ready for bed. thats at least two hours lost.#and then whether or not i actually fall asleep once my head hits the pillow. well that could be a couple hours.#especially if im so stressed about waking up on time#im not gonna get sleep. i might not even wake up in time. and then i work for 8 hours.#aaaaaaaa#why cant they just close the store. for a DAY#so we can work the NORMAL HOURS
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tag vent
#i have to move back to my hometown due to a mistake. a misunderstanding. and being too trusting in others ideas#and my boyfriend is moving an hour away as well. neither of us have been able to get a car or license yet due to money and i dont know when#we can see eachother again after we both move. since we started dating weve been sleeping in the same bed because we were/are roommates#just being gone for the weekend in my hometown is hard because i cant stand to be here but its worse because hes not in my bed every night#ive grown so used to falling alseep in his arms that i dont know what to do at night. i dont feel safe without his arms holding me#ive never felt safe where ive lived before. ive never felt safe in a relationship. ive never felt loved for who i am. that was until him.#now i feel safe in our home. i feel safe in our relationship. i feel loved for who i am. and now we have to be so far apart.#ive done long distance before but this is going to hurt so much my cat loves him she is super cautious and scared around new people but#she loved him since the start. not to mention shes my esa so that really mattered to me. he wants to move with me but it isnt happening#he got definite housing an hour away for super cheap in a town where he knows everyone and i have possible in a town where im surrounded by#people i know but am terrified of. im scared to move back here but have no choice. unless i make that terrifying choice of going with him.#the apartment he is getting is a two bedroom. id only have a studio. hes offered for me to come but im scared to move that far away again#i want to be with him but im scared to move to a whole new town with him. i know hes an amazing guy but we'd be moving away from my friends#and family. i already have to move away from all my friends if i go back to my hometown but this would be a different story.#moving to a whole new town with a guy that i only started dating 2 months ago? like yes. i lived with him previously and knew him for longer#than we dated but im still scared. i think rightfully so. but still.#but there are some pros to moving with him. hometown has no music scene and his town does and thats really important to me.#we'd also be close to his family. but farther from mine. hed be around friends and id have none no matter where i go.#idk im just rambling but i really needed to vent. i lost my best friend recently to the point of them siding with strangers almost and they#helped them break and enter into the house to intimidate me and bf and then a few days later came with cops after saying repeatedly that#they were an anarchist and acab but only when they dont use them apparently. because i guess morals/values only matter when its convenient#im so tired though but i cant sleep so i might write some cringe poetry and try to chill out before going on a late night/early morning walk#tag vent#vent in tags
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there's a very specific kind of vibe that comes with living with your friends in final year that it just does not have in first year or even second year. like as a fresher it's usually the first time any of you have lived away from home let alone with SO MANY people your age and it's terrifying and exciting and randomised to boot so it's generally carnage for a whole year in the best and worst ways, and then second year you pick who you're living with and it feels like for the first time you're doing this adult thing PROPERLY. you have a place of your own now. these are the people you've chosen to live with. studying gets serious etc. but it's still fresh. it's still new. you still don't know how to navigate it. but final year? final year is when you actually get it right. you know how to manage your time better. you know what works for you and what doesn't. studying is the main focus and you've been out in the world for three years now and it's not loud and boisterous like it was in first year and you're not exciteable and awkward like you were in second year. you're comfortable. every single one of my flatmates has their own friend group and we mainly keep to our own social circles, but we'll still meet each other back at the house after a night out and sit in the kitchen or my room to do the debrief. sometimes i'll go days not seeing either of them despite sharing a house but every now and then someone will softly call up the stairs that 'the heating's on!' or one of us will sneeze and the other two will yell 'bless you!' through the walls. the lack of interaction isn't interpreted as dislike in ways it would have been even last year, because we're all just old enough to be past that now and settled enough in our friendship not to worry about it. idk. uni is very loud and unsettling a lot of the time so it's been really sweet to see how almost boringly comfortable final year is.
#like my day today was literally drag myself out of bed at 10am to meet my econ friends bc we're in a group together#and i spent two hours with them writing a fucking TRADE REPORT before coming home#and the rest of the day was kinda lost. i showered. i put a wash on. i had a nap. i mainly stayed in my room#which sometimes is the End Of All Things but today was quite nice#and i can hear in their rooms how my flatmates are doing the exact same thing. pottering about and getting on with uni#and we've barely spoken all day but earlier my one flatmate ran into my room all excited to show me her nails#bc she's been teaching herself to do gels and it took her 2 hours but im still one of the first people she wanted to show#and just now we all went to use the bathroom at the same time and it led to one of our Stair Sessions#where we all inexplicably just gather on the stairs and chat for no reason with a cup of tea#idk it's just nice. it's such basic shit but i can't belive in first year i used to spend EVERY DAY with these girls#and we were one single friendship group and that was all we had#and then in second year one girl branched off bc she lived in a studio and got into her societies#but me and the other girl lived together again and it was the same thing of she was a friend before she was someone i lived with#and weirdly that can actually be detrimental to a dynamic. but this year we're all just very solidified and confident in ourselves#and where we stand and yes we all have our own friendship groups outside of the house now#but there's still that love and simple comfortableness around each other that you only get with time and a hell of a lot of proximity#and a sense of being settled that maybe is just what happens as you get older#idk it's just really nice. if i had this exact same day in first year (doing economics and barely leaving my room)#it would've been a really bad depressive day for me so the fact i can find such contentment from it now is really heartening#i love my little life here im very proud of what ive been able to achieve :)#hella goes to uni#feeling nostalgic because SOME BITCH decided to ribs post
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I forgot my charger at my mom's house so while figuring out how to get it back i will probably try to not draw digitally but instead catch up on tumblr even more
....And that said how dare Jere post *that* promo the day after my birthday and while I dont have the tools or spoons to draw him 😭😭
#i slept like 3 hours but seperated into two leaps#so the last 1.5 hours were questionable#so i am exhaaaaaausted#the gig report from blind channel must wait till tomorrow then xD#i will probably go to bed in a moment#ik it is only a bit over 7 pm here but this boy needs to catch up on beauty sleep xD#micahs thoughts#micahs foolery
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