#there is always some really good show a member of my family has been telling mr to watch for a really long time
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vamprisms · 6 months ago
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i should watch succession
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avianyuh · 1 month ago
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Jeon Wonwoo as a boyfriend...
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Other SVT as bf's { S.Coups , Jeonghan , Minghao/The8 , Hoshi }
Like most, I'm sure Wonwoo appeals to you because upon introduction, you think he's the quiet, brooding type
But he'd show a different side of himself in a relationship with you
A goofball all the way
Any carat knows that he's a secret comedian
I think he'd always be trying to make you laugh
Had a bad day? He'll make you watch a funny video he saw
Texting him that you miss him?
You will be sent stupid pictures as his response
GAMING
He's not competitive though
He likes to play chill games with you just because he likes to spend his time doing one of his favorite things with you
And that makes him really happy!
Please encourage him and geek out with him over video games
I think he can be sensitive sometimes
But strikes me as the type to not verbalize when something is bothering him
So being with someone observant would do him good, get him to open up more
Especially in the beginning of the relationship
I think overtime, you won't have to try as hard to get him to share his feelings with you
He'll just naturally start to feel really comfortable around you
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The g-gl-glasses
Ughhhh
I know you love them
You get to see him in his glasses basically everywhere
Barely takes them off to begin with
Even some promotions he keeps them on
Imagine late night gaming with him
The lights are all out and your sitting as close to each other as possible
And the reflection of the computer screen is in his glasses and he's all happy because he's really enjoying himself omg
You're just looking at him and thinking Damn that's my man...
As I've pointed out in my previous dating seventeen posts, you have to pass the vibe check and get approval from all the members if you want to be a permanent part of Wonwoo's life
Strikes me as the type to see you on the down-low for a few months
Would probably mention you to Mingyu since last I heard, they're roomies
You'd be introduced to Mingyu first
Then he'd probably mention that he met someone to the rest of the guys
Then he'd bring you around the dorm, or a dance practice, somewhere you can meet as many members as possible
That way Seungkwan can be his extroverted self and make you feel comfortable.
Like, imagine meeting another relatively quiet member like Jun or Woozi
"Nice to meet you😐🙂"
Please tell me you can see that happening cuz I can
Maybe even Minghao or Seungcheol would be sorta awkward
Like not in a bad way, but introverts need time to warm up to someone new (speaking from experience)
But once everyone has been acquainted and they like you, you will be family and it will shift from like to love
Because you treat Wonu right and you make him happy
Wonwoo being with you would make him more energetic and outgoing
He's a homebody
Normally I would say opposites attract, but in his case I definetly think being with another introvert would be ideal lol
Would recommend you a lot of books
And would want you to read his favorites so the two of you could discuss them
Same with video games
Remember I told you to let him geek out?
PLZ LET HIM BE A GEEK!!!!!!
I think Wonwoo would love to go on vacation every once in a while
I think he can drive abroad
But even just driving in Korea
Going on day trips
Just talking, singing to your favorite songs
Teasing him by playing some of SVT's music
Or just sitting in a comfortable silence
That's the best type of silence and it's very underrated imo
One thing about Wonwoo is how tall he is
6 feet I think? (182 cm for those not in the U.S.)
And he has very broad shoulders
Imagine watching a scary movie with him and hiding your face in his chest, and he wraps his arms around you
Lowkey protective
Just wants to keep you safe
Loves everything about you
The type to stare at you and just blurt out that he finds you beautiful
He's well read so he'd probably say something really poetic
Just makes you feel special
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Shexy Shtuff:
Okay, we need to sit and have a conversation about how buff this man is...
Look at those pecs
Damn
He's ripped
He's not a gym bro, but he definitely likes going
Imagine him coming home and he's all sweaty and his muscles are all visible
He loves a good sweater or hoodie so I think seeing his physique is rare
The quiet ones are always great kissers...
This bitch is all dark and mysterious
A.K.A most likely a FREAK
Uses tongue when he kisses
Like, probably pulls you on top of him if you're on the couch or lays you down on the bed
Or pins you against the wall if he's frustrated or hasn't seen you in a while
If you ever got in an argument he's apologizing profusely and then making up for it in bed
Definitely a grunter
Not overly vocal
More concerned with your needs
Definitely a giver
I don't think he's that adventurous when it comes to location
Bed, shower, couch maybe
Most of the time, you'll be watching a movie or maybe sitting on his lap if you come in while he's playing games on his computer (or just doing something on his computer in general)
So there you are, sitting on his lap, not trying to do anything sexual, just asking what he's playing or doing
And at first everything's good but as you're readjusting yourself in his lap, you're shifting around and suddenly he's getting turned on
He'd start kissing your cheek, your neck, moving his hands up to waist
Eventually getting impatient and scooping you up and taking you to his bedroom
Shower sex after the gym
Or late at night after practice if he isn't too tired
I see him being a big pillow-talker
Get's really emotionally vulnerable with you after sex
And that's how you know he trusts you
And congratulations, his voice is already deep as is, but in the morning, omg he'd sound so hot right after he wakes up
Would love to just keep you in his arms and lay in bed for a while, especially if he had nothing to do that day
Okay, i think this is long enough now
In conclusion, I think he'd be a great boyfriend
~
{A/N: AHHH, omg I'm sorry I've been inactive the past two weeks, I got pneumonia. I'm still recovering but felt really bad that I hadn't posted. I've been trying to make up my missed schoolwork. I couldn't think of a fanfic to write so I decided to do a headcanon for seventeen to add to the series. Wonwoo was my first bias back in 2017 before I realized I'm a coups girl. But I'll be honest, sometimes I'm creeping on Wonwoo's fancams (sorry Cheol) Anyways, I love you guys so much whether you're a frequent reader/follower or this is your first time reading anything from me. I love you, have a great day/night, whenever you're reading this, mwahhhh❤️ I put in a continue reading because this one was so much longer than my previous bf headcanons, Wonwoo, a man of substance lol}
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cherryredcheol · 2 months ago
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"cutie"
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tldr: all the ways seungkwan uses your nickname a/n: i rise from the dead to give you...kwannie. 🥰 first person to guess why his nickname is cutie gets to decide who i post next.
screams: because it’s life or death
“cutie!” he was so dramatic sometimes, always pulling you into his antics. this time it was an intense game of ‘the floor is lava’. chairs were spread all over the practice room, brims of hats squished flat underfoot to protect the members from the invisible threat. you stood in the doorway, foot hovering above the polished wood. 
“don’t step down!” he called to you from across the room, perched on his own chair, looking very much the damsel in distress he often pretended to be. he pointed to a folder haphazardly strewn not too far from where you were, gesturing for you to stand on it. always happy to go along with his antics, you took the leap.  
“winner gets all the money in seungcheol’s wallet” he explained, watching as you expertly maneuvered around the room, trying to get closer to him. he was impressed as he watched you hurdle from one chair to another, reaching a hand out to steady you as soon as you were in reach. “if one of us wins, we’ll go on a nice date, cutie.”
sighs: when it's just you two
“cutie” he lets out a deep breath, sinking into the couch next to you. he’d been gone since the early morning, kissing you goodbye before the sun even dared to show face. said sun has long sunk below the horizon, beautiful moon taking it’s place and he finally made it home to you. 
“did you eat?” even after a long day he still thinks of you, knowing you’d likely waited for him to eat. shaking your head, affirming what he already knew, he fished his phone out of his pocket, handing it over to you easily. it was too late to cook and he was too tired to wait, to take out it was. 
“use my card to order something. my only request is that it be delicious.” you chuckled at his request, already pulling up the delivery app. he sunk further into the couch, putting an arm around you and pulling you into his side. he was finally starting to feel relaxed after his stressful day. “thank you, cutie.”
murmurs: in the middle of the night
“cutie…”  the name breaks the silence in the room, pulling you out of your light sleep. you hum quietly, letting him know you heard him but not turning on the bed to face him, far too comfortable wrapped in the sheets. it had been a long day of travel from seoul to jeju and you just wanted to rest. 
“i’m really happy you’re here with me.” he was whispering, trying not to wake his sleeping family. everyone was in town for his cousin’s wedding and the house was full of people. talk too loud and someone is bound to complain. but he couldn't resist talking to you now, knowing during waking hours you get no privacy given the sheer number of bodies around.  
“the wedding is going to be fun, i think.” he knew you were hardly awake, barely listening to him ramble on in the wee hours of the morning. as he watched your back rise and fall steadily he figured he should probably leave you alone and follow you off to dreamland so you could be well rested for the festivities. “good night, cutie.”
croons: into the karaoke machine
“cutie~” he extends the “e” sound of the word into the mic, his voice filling the small karaoke room you had rented with some friends to celebrate his birthday. there was nothing he loved more than singing, except maybe you. this room had been a surprise for him, a way to let him know how loved he is by everyone. 
“dance with me!” he was drunk, a little drunker than he’d usually let himself get but since it was his birthday he felt like he’d allow himself to indulge. he’d been singing for the better part of an hour, stopping only to take bites of food and shots of soju. his face was flushed, but it was hard to tell if that was from the belting or the alcohol. 
“happy birthday to me!” he shouted into the mic for the umpteenth time tonight, and you smiled wide, not even close to sick of it. you were so happy to celebrate him. he was loved and it was important that he know that. if you had to listen to him shout about his birthday all night long, you’d do it happily. “best birthday ever, cutie!”
sneers: on the court
“cutie, that’s another point for me!” you loved playing games with him, but only when you played on the same team. he was the greatest teammate but the worst opponent. competitive and driven, he was formidable and sometimes annoying, especially about badminton. and what had started as a friendly game has quickly turned sour. 
“come on, don’t mope.” he was about to serve when he noticed the downturned expression on your face. crossing under the net, he approached you, reaching out to run his thumb along your bottom lip that pushed out in a pout. his actions were soft but you knew it was only a front. he wasn’t about to take it easy on you, even if you begged. 
“this will be over quickly anyway.” he couldn’t help but laugh at the shift from forlorn to disbelief on your face as he backed away eager to get back to the game. back on his side of the net, he pointed to your baseline with his racket, “get in position, cutie.”
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starlightkun · 3 months ago
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❧ word count: 26.1k ❧ genre: angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, paranormal/supernatural au, ghost!jisung ❧ warnings: mentions of death, prominent side character dies early in the fic, depictions of grieving, family member of the reader is sick (it’s dementia-like, though the disease is never named in the fic), family tension/drama (reader has some family members that are not very nice to her), reader has some sleep/physical health issues at one point, reader is just really going through it in this fic for a while ❧ extra info: the reader’s mom in this has early-onset memory issues; i didn’t name a specific disease because im not a medical expert of any kind and didn’t want to misrepresent any real-life illness in this fic. i combined both my own experiences with my own family members who have had these kinds of illnesses and some research, but i am not an expert and the representation in this fic may not be entirely accurate! ❧ author’s note: i don’t think i’ve done a spooky fic like this before? but this one was super fun! also i will say it takes a little bit for jisung to show up, so please be patient when you don’t see him in the first few scenes, he’ll be there, i promise! ❧ sequel
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That night, the rain was still pounding against the windows. Your mom had gone to bed a while ago, but your mind was restless. Something had happened again as you were helping your mom get ready for bed. Your stepdad’s reading glasses, which were on the nightstand on his side of their bed, as they had been since he passed, had fallen off with seemingly no rhyme or reason. Not wanting your mom to get spooked about the house again, you reassured her that you had just bumped into the furniture—her back was turned when they fell—but it left you with an uneasy feeling.
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“Hi, Hyukjun.” You picked up the phone call from your stepdad as you headed back towards your office building from the restaurant you’d taken your lunch break at.
“Hi, sweetheart. How are you?” His warm, familiar voice was on the other end as always, though there was something different about it, something you couldn’t quite put your finger on from the quality of your phone speaker. Your steps slowed thoughtfully as you listened more attentively, a pit growing in your stomach.
“I’m good,” you answered shortly, suspicion creeping over you. “How are you two?”
It wasn’t that you didn’t appreciate hearing from your stepdad, you were on good terms with him. Your father passed when you were a little girl, and your mom continued to raise you on her own, not even considering any romantic prospects until you graduated high school. She and Hyukjun only dated for six months before marrying and had been happily married since. Hyukjun was a mild-mannered divorcee with three adult sons of his own, all of whom were at least a decade older than you, and none of which you were exceptionally close with. When your mom had been diagnosed only five years into their marriage, he began taking care of her—no question and no complaints. With her condition, you were fairly certain that you visited them more than Hyukjun’s own kids did, despite all of them living nearby to your knowledge.
He at least didn’t beat around the bush anymore. “She’s getting worse, Y/N.”
“How bad?”
“She thinks the house is haunted,” he admitted. “And I…”
“What?” You prompted him.
“She’s been asking for you. I know you’re busy, but if you could visit soon, I think it’d really help her.”
“Yeah, I have some time this weekend,” you agreed immediately. “I’ll be there.”
“Thanks.”
You were arriving at the building then, slowing to a stop outside as you prepared to hang up. “My break is ending, Hyukjun, I’ve got to go.”
“Of course,” he acquiesced. “Hey, I love you.”
“I love you too.” You looked up at the gray storm clouds gathering in the sky above you. “And tell Mom I love her, and I’ll be there soon.”
“I will. Have a good rest of your day at work, sweetheart.”
“Right. Bye.”
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When your mom and Hyukjun got married, you already had a lease on a small place closer to your job in the city, so your mom sold your childhood home and moved in with Hyukjun. Despite the small twinge of sadness at her selling your childhood home, the place where you, your mom, and dad had all been together, you were happy that she was no longer there by herself. Their home was a quaint two-story, two-bedroom townhome, with well-tended flowerbeds and a porch swing out front. A long time ago, you knew that this house had been your stepbrothers’ childhood home, the three of them sharing what was now the guest room, Hyukjun and his ex-wife occupying the primary bedroom that was now his and your mother’s. Hyukjun had been divorced for many years before he met your mom, you didn’t know the exact number off the top of your head—you weren’t sure if you had ever been told.
The snapdragons were in bloom, stalks of purples and blues and pinks, and you squatted down next to one. Feeling a bit like a child, you gently squeezed the sides of one flower to make the “mouth” of the dragon open, like Hyukjun had shown you one of the first times you’d met, the very first time you ever went to his house. The front door opened, and you looked up to see your stepdad stepping out of the house. You stood up, walking up the three short steps from the sidewalk to meet him on their porch.
“I saw you coming up the street,” he explained, gesturing to the front window. “It’s good to see you, Y/N.”
“Hi, Hyukjun.” You hugged him. “Good to see you too.”
“I just wanted to give you a heads up. She’s calm, but she’s not exactly… here,” he explained. “I didn’t want you to be caught off-guard.”
You nodded in understanding. “Okay. Thanks for letting me know.”
Following your stepdad into the house, he guided you towards the living room at the back of the house.
“Hon?” He poked his head into the living room.
Your mom looked up from where she had been reading a book in an armchair, her face breaking into a gentle smile. “Oh, Sangwoo, you’re back.”
“Yes, I picked Y/N up, just like you asked.” Your stepdad stepped aside to let her see you.
You pushed aside the alarms going off in your mind to give your mother as calm of a smile as you could, approaching her with your hand outstretched. “Hi, Mom, it’s Y/N.”
“Y/N, hi, sweetie.” She beamed at you, taking your hand that was offered and squeezing it tight. “How was school?”
“It was good, I had a good day,” you answered brightly. Looking down at the book in her lap, you asked, “What are you reading?”
Your mother had been a Literature teacher for all her life, before her diagnosis forced her to retire many years before she ever wanted to. She would read to you at any opportunity when you were a kid, especially at bedtime. It was always easiest to get her talking now about whatever book she was reading, no matter where her mind was.
“Oh, I’ll tell you about it later. First, do you have homework?”
“No, Mom, nothing today.”
Hyukjun cleared his throat then. “You must be hungry, Y/N. Would you like something to eat?”
“Yes, yes, go get a snack.” Your mother insisted.
“Okay,” you acquiesced, giving her hand another tight squeeze. “I’ll be right back after my snack. I want to hear about your book.”
In their kitchen, you turned on your stepdad with wide eyes. “She’s not just mixing up your names anymore, she thinks you are my dad!”
“Sometimes…” Hyukjun nodded, leaning against a kitchen counter. “Not always. She has her lucid days still.”
In the bright kitchen lighting, you could see a certain tiredness in Hyukjun that was new, a pallor in his skin, a hitch in his breaths, a lag in his movements, none of which used to be there.
“What’s wrong?” You asked, eyes locking on his. “With you? You were going to tell me something on the phone, and you didn’t. Tell me.”
He sighed, the sound dragging out into a wheeze and then a hacking cough that he covered in his elbow, and you winced just watching him. When he’d caught his breath again, he answered, “They found a tumor, in my lung. I have maybe six months, Y/N.”
“That’s it?!” You blurted out. “I-I mean, even with chemo, or radiation, or whatever?”
“I’m not—”
“It’s not treatable?”
He cast a sidelong glance down the hall, at the room where your mother was. “Someone needs to take care of her. I need to be here, and after I’m gone, our savings will go towards her care. We can’t spend it all on something that might give me another few months.”
“Another few months with her! With us!” You grabbed his arm, knowing how desperate you sounded. “What about your kids? Do they know what you’re doing?”
“No.” His voice was heavy, but determined. “I know you all don’t talk… but don’t tell them, please.”
His face wavered in your vision as your eyes filled with tears. You tried to swallow them down, but a couple spilled over. “Let me move in, and help. I want to take care of both of you. Please.”
“What about your job?”
“I’ll figure it out. Don’t worry about me. You’ve done enough for me, for us. Let me do something for you.”
“Thank you.”
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Your work agreed to let you move into a part-time remote position. Most days you were able to get all your done, early even. Not only was Hyukjun there, but a memory care aide named Nayoung came by for an hour three days a week to assist as well.
It had been a month since you moved into the primary bedroom on the second floor, the bedroom that used to be your mom and stepdad’s. You found out that they moved their things into the guest room on the first floor two months ago, when your mom hurt herself on the stairs. It had only been a skinned knee, but Hyukjun didn’t want to risk something worse.
That night you laid in bed with your laptop open, desperately trying to finish up a report that was due the next day. Today had been rougher, your mom needing constant redirection and reorientation, not to mention the conversation that you had with your stepdad earlier this evening. Usually after your mom went to sleep, the two of you would watch a movie or a couple episodes of a show, or just have a drink and chat. It was a nice, slow, easy part of your day with just the two of you. But this time as you rooted around the for the fresh tub of ice cream that you had just bought from the store, and called to him over your shoulder asking if he wanted a bowl, you saw him waiting for you with papers in his hand.
One of the errands he’d sent you on today, in addition to groceries, the post office, and the pharmacy, had been to an attorney’s office. You’d known that, you weren’t stupid. There, you had been handed a large envelope with the law firm’s name embossed on it, and your stepdad’s name typed on a label under that. You didn’t inquire as to the contents of the envelope from the receptionist, nor your stepdad when you delivered it to him upon returning home. It was none of your business. But at the kitchen table that night, he showed you the documents that he had drawn up.
Once he passed, you would own his house, the one that you lived in now, as a life estate pur autre vie. For the life of another. Until your mother passed, you would own his house, and could stay here and take care of her. Then, once she passed, the house would go to his sons, your stepbrothers, as he’d always intended.
You sighed and deleted the sentence you’d just written. “Stupid, stupid,” you muttered to yourself. Looking at the time, you let out another sigh and rubbed your face in exasperation. “I’m never going to fucking finish this.”
Setting the laptop aside, you pushed your covers off yourself and got out of bed. Keeping your footsteps light, you crept downstairs and into the kitchen to get yourself a glass of water. After drinking a whole glass in the kitchen, you refilled it to bring it back up to bedroom with you. Halfway up the stairs, the sconce on the wall next to your head flickered on, making you pause. You’d left all the lights off on your way down. Peering behind the frosted glass cover, you reached your hand back there and tightened the bulb. The light stopped flickering, and you looked around at the empty, dark staircase again. Shrugging to yourself, you finished your journey to your room.
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Cutting up your mom’s breakfast into small pieces, you hummed a song that had been stuck in your head. The sound of something clattering startled your peaceful reverie, and your head snapped up immediately. You darted around the kitchen counter to get your eyes on where your mom was sitting at the kitchen table.
“You okay, Mom?” You asked, eyes searching her for any signs of injury or distress.
“Oh, I’m fine, sweetie,” she reassured you, pointing at a point on the floor further away from her. You saw that a silver utensil was gleaming up from the tile. “I dropped my fork, that’s all.”
“I’ll grab you another one when I bring your food in, don’t worry about it,” you reassured her. “Leave it, I’ll pick it up in a sec.”
Returning to the kitchen, you finished cutting her food, then prepared yours and Hyukjun’s plates. Carrying all three of them in, along with your mom’s clean fork, you cocked your head when you saw the fork sitting on the closest edge of the table to the kitchen. Looking at Hyukjun, who had joined your mom at the table in the interim, you said, “You didn’t have to pick up the fork, Hyukjun, I was going to grab it.”
His face betrayed his momentary confusion, looking between the food you just set in front of him, then to the fork on the edge of the table. “That was there when I came in. I didn’t move it.”
As you set your mom’s food down for her, you asked, “Mom, did you get the fork?”
But her eyes had a familiar far-out appearance, and you knew she wasn’t going to be able to answer you. You shook your head at yourself, putting your own plate down and grabbing the dirty fork off the table. Dropping it in the kitchen sink, you then returned to the table to take your seat next to your mother and across from Hyukjun.
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You weren’t sure why you were awake at first. Everything seemed quiet, but something didn’t feel right. Sitting up in bed, you checked the time on your phone. 2:48 a.m. You desperately wanted to go back to sleep, but you couldn’t shake the uneasiness in your mind, and so you pushed the covers off of you.
As soon as you were at the top of the stairs, you could hear voices downstairs, your mother’s and your stepdad’s. Your stepdad was clearly trying to keep his voice down, but your mom wasn’t, and she sounded distressed.
“Sangwoo, I’m telling you something’s wrong with this house! We need to go! Where’s Y/N?!” She demanded of him.
“She’s fine, she’s sleeping. Please, tell me what’s wrong with the house, and we can try to fix it,” he pleaded with her quietly.
You finally made it to the hallway just outside their bedroom, taking in the scene of your mom’s wild, scared eyes and Hyukjun’s desperate concern. “Mom, I’m here, I’m okay.”
“Y/N!” She let out a gasp of relief as soon as she saw you. “Oh, you’re okay.”
“Yes, Mom, I’m okay.” You offered her your hand, and she grabbed it tightly. “What’s wrong? Why are you up?”
“I’ve been trying to tell your dad—” She gestured to Hyukjun pointedly. “But this house isn’t right.”
“What do you mean?”
“It just isn’t right,” she repeated insistently. “What happened to our old house? We need to go back there!”
You looked at Hyukjun desperately, at a loss for words to explain that she sold it years ago. Thankfully, he took over.
“It’s late, hon. We can’t go all the way back to the old house this late at night, especially not with Y/N. It’s not safe,” he persuaded her gently.
She seemed to relax a little at this. “Oh. Right. It’s late.”
“Can you read me something, Mom?” You requested sweetly.
This finally brought a smile to her features, and she nodded, her grasp on your hand turning tender. “Oh, of course, Y/N. I’m sorry I woke you, sweetie.”
“It’s alright, Mom,” you reassured her, leading her back into their bedroom. “Everything’s alright.”
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Hyukjun’s funeral was quaint. It was kept to family and close friends, and organized mostly by his sons and ex-wife. You didn’t mind, your mother was in no shape to organize a funeral, and you were more than happy to step aside and support her through this while they dealt with the details.
Today of all days was one of your mother’s better days, possibly one of the best that she’s had in a while, and you didn’t know if that was better or worse. Better, you decided, so she could say goodbye to him properly. After the small funeral was the wake, held at Hyukjun’s home—which was now your home, you realized—and was a more open-door affair. Your mom’s memory care aide, Nayoung, came as well, which you were glad for. While your stepbrothers and their mother played host more than you, greeting guests as they showed up, chatting and reminiscing with them about all their shared memories of Hyukjun from years or even decades ago, it was still your residence, and you couldn’t bring yourself to just stay in a corner. Hyukjun had been your family too, for however brief a period of your life.
You were alone in the kitchen getting refreshments for yourself, your mom, and Nayoung when you sensed that you weren’t by yourself. Turning around, you did in fact see your stepbrothers entering the kitchen, followed by their mother.
You offered them all a small, polite smile. “Hi.”
“Glad we caught you, Y/N,” the oldest brother flashed you a grin. “You got a sec?”
“Yeah, of course.”
“We know it must be really tough for you, taking care of your mom by yourself now,” their mother said, her voice coated in an over-the-top sugary sweet sympathy.
You shrugged noncommittally. “Nayoung helps.”
The youngest jumped in, “We just wanted you to know that you and your mom can take as much time as you need to move out.”
“Of course, of course,” their mother agreed. “You know, a week or two.”
They all nodded and murmured in agreement, focusing the same overeager, empty, sympathetic faces on you that made you feel like you were surrounded by some kind of predator that wanted to empathize you to death. Steeling your nerves, you met all of their eyes in turn as you went to answer.
“We’re not moving out.” You informed them firmly. “Hyukjun left the house to me to keep taking care of my mom. After… it’s all yours.”
“And we’re supposed to believe you’ll just give it to us?” The youngest scoffed, immediately dropping his kind, caring act. All of their faces were somewhere between disbelief and anger.
“No, he set it up that way. You can get your copies of the papers from his attorney, Mr. Shin.” You brought out the business card for the attorney who drafted the papers. You’d tucked it into your wallet absentmindedly when it’d been given to you on your initial errand from Hyukjun, and you were glad you hadn’t had the time to clean out your wallet since. You set the business card down on the counter between you.
The oldest snatched up the card. “There’s no way…”
“We’re going to fight this. No way the house is yours,” the youngest swore.
The middle son spoke finally, his gaze hard as he glared at you. He practically snarled, “You’re not his family, you’ve never been.”
“It was good seeing you all again,” you said, no emotion in your voice. Abandoning your three glasses, you scooted around the counter, then around them, heading towards the kitchen door that they had been blocking the whole time. “Please have all communications about the property go through Mr. Shin. He’ll be able to answer your questions better than I can.”
Crying at a wake was normal. Encouraged even. But you weren’t amongst loved ones, remembering someone you’d lost. You were alone, sitting at the top of the stairs in the dark, crying into your arms to muffle your sobs as you tried to compose yourself from the confrontation you’d just survived. Barely. Your hands were balled into fists to keep them from shaking.
“Are you okay?” A quiet voice caught your attention, gentle, then hushed as he seemed to be speaking to himself, “Why are you asking that? Stupid, stupid.”
You picked your head up out of your arms, quickly wiping the tears that had been streaming down your cheeks as you spotted a young man at the bottom of the stairs. He had dark hair and was dressed in a pair of black pants, a white shirt, and what looked like a black cardigan over the shirt. You didn’t recognize him from the wake, but you hadn’t greeted everyone, nor did you know all the mourners personally. Many were either family friends of Hyukjun’s from before he met your mother, old colleagues, or distant relations.
Sniffling and trying to right your clothes, you offered him as much of a smile you could muster, “I’m sorry, it’s uhm, been a long day.”
He froze, his eyes locking on yours and going wide. The man looked behind him, as if expecting you to have been addressing somebody else, and upon seeing an empty hallway, he turned back to you and hesitantly replied, “That’s… okay. Are you alright?”
“Oh, as alright as I can be, I suppose,” you admitted, dabbing at your eyes with your sleeve again. You weren’t sure why you were telling this random man that, but he had spotted you sobbing at a wake, so there wasn’t much of a point in covering that fact up. “Were you looking for the bathroom or…?”
“No, just stretching my legs.” He pushed his hands into the pockets of his cardigan. “I’m sorry for your loss.”
“Thank you.” You nodded. “I don’t think I saw you at the funeral. How did you know my stepdad? Family friend?”
“Yeah, I was around when his kids were growing up.”
“Oh, are you a childhood friend of his sons or something?”
“Friend is a stretch, I think,” he chuckled.
You couldn’t help but laugh bitterly as well, adding a polite but hollow, “I’m sure they appreciate you coming out to pay your respects.”
As he shifted on his feet, the shadows on his face lessened, letting you see his features better. You furrowed your brow with interest.
“How old are you? I mean—You don’t look older than me, you must’ve been much younger than them growing up.”
“I-I mean, we weren’t very close,” he stammered, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.
Feeling bad about putting him on the spot in this sort of scenario, you offered him a sympathetic smile. “Sorry, I didn’t mean anything by that. I didn’t grow up with my stepbrothers, so I guess it’s a bit hard for me to imagine them having friends—Oh!”
As soon as the words were out of your mouth, you slapped a hand over it, wishing you hadn’t said them, especially not to some stranger, who for all you know could turn right around and repeat it to your stepbrothers. That would be the last thing you needed, to give them another reason to hate you, and by extension, your mother.
“That didn’t come out right!” You desperately tried to backpedal, holding your hands out in front of you. “I-I meant that I haven’t met a lot of their friends, since our parents got together later in life, and—”
“It’s okay, it’s okay,” he reassured you calmly, taking a couple hesitant steps up the stairs. You scooted over to make room for him to sit next to you on the top step. He pressed himself against the banister, leaving plenty of space between you two. “I didn’t mean to, but I heard some of what they said to you in the kitchen.”
“I would normally be upset at you for eavesdropping, but I’m kind of glad that somebody else heard some of the shit they said to me this time,” you chuckled cynically.
“‘This time?’” He repeated questioningly. “Are they always like that to you?”
“I don’t see them that often. I think the first time I met the middle son was at the wedding, actually,” you said. “They started spending more holidays with their mom instead of Hyukjun when my mom… after her diagnosis.”
“Oh.”
“God, sorry, you don’t need to be hearing all this shit.” You shook your head at yourself. “I mean, I don’t even know your name.”
“I’m Jisung.”
“Y/N.”
“For what it’s worth, I don’t think it’s true. You and your mom are his family, too.”
You messed with the sleeves of your shirt as you stared at the bottom step, gnawing on your bottom lip, ignoring the metallic taste of blood when you broke skin. Finally, once you’d swallowed down the lump in your throat, you replied with a tight, “Thanks. And I mean, I understand why they would be upset. Their dad just died and two people who are essentially strangers to them are now living in their childhood home. Of course they feel weird about it.”
“That’s... gracious.”
“It’s true. And like I said, their dad died, they deserve some grace.” From elsewhere in the house, you could hear your mom calling your name, and immediately jumped to your feet. “Sorry, I’ve got to go.”
“I understand.” Jisung nodded to you. “It was nice talking to you, Y/N.”
“Yeah, you too. Thanks for listening, Jisung.” You waved to him over your shoulder as you rushed down the stairs and off in the direction of your mother’s voice.
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The next day, you had habitually started preparing three plates of breakfast before you caught yourself. In the first couple days after his passing, it was painfully in the foreground of your mind with everything you did, but this was the first time you’d found yourself going about a daily task and it had slipped your mind. You left the full plate of food in the kitchen to clean up later, and took just yours and your mom’s plates to the kitchen table.
“Do you want to go on a walk after breakfast?” You proposed as you ate.
It was something that Hyukjun and your mom did every morning. Sometimes you joined them, but usually you took the opportunity to clean up around the house or get work done in the quiet. Your mother had no trouble ambulating, it was her mind that was going faster than anything else. With Hyukjun no longer here to walk with her, you didn’t want her to lose that precious time going out, or the exercise. Not to mention, you needed to get out of the house again.
“Oh, I’d love to, sweetie,” she agreed with a smile, one that you noticed didn’t reach her eyes.
“After we’re done, I’ll clean up while you get ready.”
As you scooped the extra food into a plastic container at the end of breakfast, you realized the lid that you’d grabbed was the wrong size. Opening the cabinet that contained all the plastic containers, you squatted down with a sigh, mentally preparing yourself to ransack through the absolute mess that greeted you down there. Hyukjun normally kept it meticulously organized, all containers accompanied by their proper lids, but in your rush to clean up after everyone left the wake late last night, you had effectively ruined all of it.
You tried to just look under a haphazard stack of plastic containers, and they of course all came crashing out onto the kitchen floor. You groaned, plopping down onto your butt as you got ready to have to put them all back. But as you went to pick up the first one, an overwhelming, crushing feeling of loneliness and sorrow hit you like a bus, and you covered your face as you started sobbing. The hot tears stung your eyes, every shaking breath you took hurt your chest, and even the task of putting the tupperware back seemed impossible and monumental now.
Rubbing one of your eyes, you inhaled and forced yourself to grab just one container to put back. “Come on, don’t have time for this.”
Slowly, you put the containers away, until there was one lid left that had slid much further away from you. You crawled over to it, realizing the shape seemed familiar as you held it in your hands. Standing back up, you fitted it over the container of leftovers you had perfectly.
“Huh.” Your sobs petered out as you looked down at it curiously. “That could’ve been easier.”
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Throwing open the front door, you grunted as you hauled your heavy grocery bags into the home.
“Y/N? Is that you?” Nayoung’s voice called out. She had increased the frequency and duration of her visits since Hyukjun’s passing, and today you took the opportunity to do some much-needed restocking of the kitchen during her stay.
“Yeah!” You yelled back.
“Do you need any help?”
“No, I’m fine!” You hopped on one foot as you tried to wedge your other foot behind the door to close it. “Just—Shit!”
The door suddenly came loose, slamming closed even harder than you had opened it. Nayoung came around the corner with wide eyes, looking rather startled.
“Is everything okay?” She asked, taking a couple bags from your hands, looking you over inquisitively.
You looked between your still-raised foot and the door, a bit dumbfounded. You swore you hadn’t kicked it that hard. This wasn’t actually your house, after all.
“Yeah, Nayoung, I’m okay,” you reassured her, leading the way into the kitchen. “Do you have a window open? There must be a cross-breeze or something.”
“No, I don’t think so.”
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It was pouring rain outside, the sky dull and gray, occasionally lit up with flashes of lightning. The constant pounding downpour was interspersed with cracks of thunder that would rattle frames on the walls. The weather was so bad that Nayoung couldn’t even make it out, leaving just you and your mom all day. It wasn’t so bad, today was a better day for her. She was calm at least, despite the weather, absorbed in her books for most of the day. Maybe a little too absorbed, as it was hard to tear her away for meals or snacks. But you could get your work done and do chores around the house uninterrupted, and once you finished your own to-do list, you were able to sit down in the living room with her and read as well.
After a particularly bright flash of lightning, followed by a boom of thunder that made you feel like you were in a low-level earthquake rather than a thunderstorm, the lights went out entirely. You heard the telltale clatter of your mom dropping her book in surprise as she gasped.
“Mom?” You called out to her, both to check on her and so she knew that you were still there.
“I’m okay, sweetie,” she promised. “I just got startled and dropped my book.”
“Stay there,” you directed her, pulling out your phone and turning on your flashlight. You could see that her book had skidded some distance away from her, out of arm’s reach. “I’ll check the breaker. Don’t get up, I don’t want you tripping over anything.”
“Alright. Be safe.”
Opening the utility closet in the laundry room, you threw your hands up in exasperation as you looked over the circuit breaker. You had no fucking clue what you were doing. Right as you had turned on your phone, fully intent on searching the internet for what the fuck you were supposed to do now, the power came back on all on its own.
“Well, there we go!” You called out through the house, starting back towards your mom. “I’m a genius!”
Upon your return to the living room, you stopped when you noticed one key difference: The book was no longer on the floor. It was on the side table next to your mom. There was no way your mom could’ve moved fast enough to have gotten the book and then sat back down in the time since the lights turned back on.
You sighed gently. “I told you not to get up, Mom.”
“I didn’t.”
“Then how’d the book get there?” You pointed to the book knowingly.
“I didn’t—” She looked at it curiously, then at where it used to be on the floor. “Oh… I guess I must’ve… Sorry, sweetie.”
You walked over to rest a hand on her shoulder. “It’s okay, Mom. I’m sorry if I seemed upset with you. I just don’t want you getting hurt.”
She patted your hand. “I know, Y/N. You’re doing a good job.”
The rain was still pounding against the windows that night. Your mom had gone to bed a while ago, but your mind was restless. Something had happened again as you were helping your mom get ready for bed. Hyukjun’s reading glasses, which were on the nightstand on his side of their bed, as they had been since he passed, had fallen off with seemingly no rhyme or reason. Not wanting your mom to get spooked about the house again, you reassured her that you had just bumped into the furniture—her back was turned when they fell—but it left you with an uneasy feeling.
You’d pocketed the glasses instead of replacing them on the nightstand, and were staring at them on the kitchen counter now, fondly remembering the way he used to peer at you over the lenses as he read the newspaper in the morning and you made sarcastic quips about whatever headlines were on the pages facing you.
“Hyukjun?” You said his name into the empty air, uncertainty making your voice waver. After a beat of silence, you hissed, “Of course you weren’t going to get a reply, stupid, stupid.”
Trying to gather yourself, you moved to open the freezer, securing the tub of ice cream from inside it. Sitting at the kitchen table with two spoons, you set one in front of Hyukjun’s spot across from you. Glumly spooning some ice cream into your mouth, you barely tasted it as you stared at his empty chair.
“I miss you,” you said softly, not expecting an answer this time. “A lot. It’s not fair. I know that’s what your sons think, it’s not fair that it was you and not her. But… it’s not fair that we only got… so little time with you.”
You sniffled against the oncoming tears, eating another spoonful.
“I wish… I wish my mom had met you earlier, I wish you didn’t leave us so soon, I wish we got more time…” You looked down at the tub in front of you, your appetite gone. “And I wish I wasn’t eating your favorite ice cream by myself.”
You stood back up, taking both spoons with you into the kitchen. Dropping them into the sink to deal with in the morning, you put the ice cream away and shut off the kitchen lights. You left his glasses on the kitchen counter, deciding you would put them back in your mother’s room tomorrow. As you headed up the stairs, you paused at the top step, a memory of Hyukjun’s wake coming back to you. The nice guy who sat with you and listened to you. You really wished you could have somebody to talk to again.
Something in you made you look over your shoulder then, back down at the bottom step. You swore a darker shape was standing there, unclear in the night. Your heart rate spiked.
“Hyukjun…?” You whispered, hesitantly going down one more step to try to make out what you were seeing better. The shadow seemed to back up one step at the same time you did that, and another name came to your mind.
“Jisung?”
The figure moved closer, a beam of moonlight illuminating half of his shocked face. “You remember me?”
You should’ve yelled. You should’ve shouted at him to get out, called the police, any number of things ahead of what you actually did. Getting even closer, you nodded slowly. “Of course I remember you, Jisung.”
He was still staring at you in disbelief. “And you can see me? Again?”
“Yes,” you confirmed, standing on the step right above him. “You’re a ghost.”
It was meant to be a question, but it came out like a statement, like you had known all along, just saying common knowledge.
He swallowed. “Yes.”
You peered at the space around and behind him. “Is my stepdad here?”
“No.” He shook his head. “He wanted to stay, for your mom. I told him if he stayed, he could get stuck. He decided to go.”
“Go… where?”
“I don’t know,” he admitted.
“What about…” You looked up into his dark eyes hopefully. “Is my dad here?”
“It’s just me,” he answered quietly. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be. I’m glad he’s not… stuck. Either of them.” You breathed out, a mixture of relief and disappointment in your chest. Remembering what he told you at the wake, you asked, “You used to live here?”
“Before your stepdad bought it, yeah.”
You recalled the surprise on his face both tonight and at the wake when you addressed him. “You’re not used to being seen, are you?”
“No, I’m not. You’re the first person who’s seen me since…” He trailed off, biting the inside of his cheek as he seemed to be picking his words. “Since I’ve been like this.”
You nodded slowly, understanding what he meant. “Have you been… helping? Picking up my mom’s book? And closing the door? And the tupperware lid and the fork?”
Jisung nodded fervently. “I didn’t mean to scare you, or make you sad. I’m sorry. I just wanted to help you.”
“What about Hyukjun’s glasses today? Did you knock those off?”
He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “It was an accident… They were really close to the edge, I didn’t want them to fall off and break. So I tried to move them away from the edge, but there was this thunder, and I dropped them.”
You couldn’t help but burst into laughter at the mental image of a ghost getting spooked by thunder, slapping a hand over your mouth as you giggled. Jisung wasn’t laughing, but he did have a soft smile on his features as he looked at you.
“Sorry, sorry,” you were still chuckling as you tried to compose yourself.
“It’s okay…” He assured you. “I’m sorry for dropping them.”
“You didn’t break them, it’s fine.” You looked at him thoughtfully. He was wearing the same thing he was wearing when you met him at the wake, dark pants, dark shoes, a white button-up, and dark cardigan. You tilted your head curiously. “Are you sure my mom hasn’t seen you? She swears the house is haunted, you know.”
“I think she can tell that something is… off, sometimes. But no, she’s never seen me.”
“I’m guessing you have no clue why I can see you right now?” You surmised. “They don’t exactly give you a ghost handbook, do they?”
Jisung shook his head. “No, I don’t know.”
“Thank you again, by the way. For being so nice to me at the wake.”
“They really shouldn’t have been talking to you like that.” He frowned. “They have no clue… He loved you and your mom so much. You two are his family, too.”
You chuckled sadly. “So did you actually hear all of it, then?”
“I was already in there when they went in after you,” he confirmed. “I thought you might… I could create a distraction in another room if it got bad.”
“Do you do that a lot? Follow me around?”
His eyes widened as he clearly began to panic, shaking his head fervently. “N-Not like that! Only like, in normal places! I mean, like, there’s not a lot to do when you’re a ghost stuck in a house, and I think you’re cool—Oh god, I meant, uhm, I mostly stay on the first floor, promise!”
You couldn’t help but giggle again as he had missed the light teasing in your tone. “Mostly?”
Jisung visibly gulped. “I woke you up one time, when your mom was having a really bad time in the middle of the night and your stepdad couldn’t calm her down. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have—”
“Jisung, it’s okay,” you tried your best to be reassuring, even as you let out choked laughter. “I don’t expect you to sit in a corner for eternity. Thanks for staying in normal places.”
“Thanks for not being creeped out…” He muttered, rubbing the back of his neck.
You let out a yawn, covering your mouth with your hand. After it passed, you gave Jisung a sheepish smile. “If I go to sleep right now… will I still be able to see you in the morning?”
“You… want to?”
“Yeah.” You smiled and shrugged. “Better than just talking to my mother, Nayoung, and myself like I usually do every day.”
The corners of his lips twitched as he went to nod. “I’ll try to be here in the morning. You should go to sleep.”
“Alright. Goodnight, Jisung.”
“Goodnight, Y/N.”
Halfway up the stairs, you turned back around to see him still standing at the bottom, watching you. You threw back a teasing, “Promise you’ll stay on the first floor?”
“Cross my heart.” He made an X over the left side of his chest.
“Not sure how much that’s worth coming from a ghost,” you grinned. “But I guess it’s the thought that counts.”
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In the morning, you sat with your feet dangling over the edge of your bed for an extra few seconds, very calmly contemplating your sanity. You had been spending the majority of your time in this house, talking to nobody else except your mother and Nayoung, who came five days a week for three hours at a time, your only other regular human interaction coming in the form of emails or the occasional phone calls with your co-workers. Was it really so unlikely that your brain was inventing someone new for you to talk to? How could you even determine if he was real or not? Did that even really matter?
With a sigh, you got to your feet and shuffled into your bathroom. Your mom had always been an early riser, something that hadn’t changed now, and you had to take care of your own morning routine before she woke up. While the shift in your schedule initially took some getting used to, the daily alone time that you got to devote to your own self-care was something you treasured, and helped you start your day in a good headspace.
Coming out of your bedroom refreshed and in clean clothes, you meandered down the stairs, listening for any signs of life in the rest of the house. If your mom was up, she would at least be moving around her room, if not elsewhere in the house. And then there was the possibility of seeing the ghost again.
Right as you reached the bottom of the stairs, your mom’s bedroom door opened, and she poked her head out. You smiled and walked over to her.
“Morning, Mom.”
“Hi, sweetie.” She took your arm, looking around the hallway.
“You okay?”
“Did he go out?”
You tilted your head, keeping your tone light as you asked, “…He?”
“Hyukjun,” she answered. “He usually leaves a note.”
You bit your lip and nodded. “Yeah, he had some errands, said he’ll be back soon. You can get on him about forgetting your note when he gets back.”
Her features relaxed, and she rubbed your back. “Thanks, Y/N. Don’t know what we’d do without you.”
There was a knock on the front door then, and you went to go open it up for Nayoung. As she helped your mom with the rest of her morning, you headed towards the kitchen to start on breakfast. A figure was already at the kitchen table, however, his back to you as he sat in the fourth chair that had always been empty for as long as you’d been in the house. Jisung turned around when he heard your footsteps, giving you a small wave.
“Morning,” you smiled and nodded, hoping you didn’t look too put-off. You weren’t sure if you would’ve been more surprised if he was here or not.
“Good morning.” His eyes followed you as you continued into the kitchen. From his seat, he could still see you over the kitchen counter. His hands were folded politely in his lap, and he watched you as you started pulling out ingredients for breakfast.
“So, what do you do all night?” You questioned. “Do you sleep?”
“Sometimes. Sometimes I read, or look at the moon, or think.”
“I think I’d hate being alone with my thoughts for eternity.” You shook your head, bringing down plates from the cabinet.
“It’s not so bad.” Jisung shrugged. “I wasn’t much of a talker before anyway.”
“An introvert?”
“Yes.” He tilted his head curiously. “You don’t normally cook for Nayoung.”
You looked down at the plates in your hand and realized that you had grabbed three instead of the normal two. Nayoung always ate breakfast before coming over, so you just had to make food for you and your mom. You’d done this before, accidentally making a serving for Hyukjun out of habit, but you knew that wasn’t what happened this time.
Putting the extra plate back, you said, “No, I was… I think I was about to make you a plate. Felt like I had a guest over.”
Surprisingly, this made Jisung crack a smile. “I appreciate it. Your food always looks good.”
“I don’t think it’s anything special.” You shrugged, turning on the stove. “I learned to cook from my mother, we just did it to survive. Hyukjun was a much better cook than either of us.”
“To survive?”
“After my dad passed…” You pursed your lips as you tried to think of how to phrase it, pushing around food in the pan. “She sort of closed up. My mom gave me a good life growing up, don’t get me wrong. But it’s hard being a single parent, and she never really made any friends, she spent all her time taking care of me or working. Then when I moved out, she closed up even more. I was kind of afraid she’d close all the way up, until she met Hyukjun.”
“I see…”
You heard footsteps coming from down the hall, and halted your conversation. Nayoung and your mom entered the kitchen dining area just a few moments later, paying Jisung no mind, clearly not seeing him at all.
“Y/N, were you on the phone?” Your mother asked as Nayoung guided her to her usual seat.
Nayoung took Hyukjun’s old place beside her.
“Oh, yeah, work call,” you fibbed. “Something urgent, couldn’t wait until I clocked in, I guess.”
“That’s inconsiderate.”
You chuckled, then looked to the aide. “Coffee, Nayoung?”
“If you’re making some, please.”
“Was just about to start a pot.”
Sitting down at the full table with your food and coffee in front of you, your mother to your left, Nayoung across from you, and Jisung to your right, you couldn’t help but smile, an odd sense of peace settling in your chest that hadn’t been there in quite some time.
That night, after your mother went to sleep, you traipsed into the kitchen, opening up the freezer. Turning to Jisung with the carton of ice cream in your hand, you said, “I don’t suppose you could help me with this?”
“Unfortunately not,” he chuckled.
“Figured I would ask,” you sighed, grabbing a spoon. “Come on, I’m thinking a movie?”
Curled up in the corner of the couch under a blanket, you had just opened the ice cream when you realized you left the remote on the coffee table out of your reach. Jisung was still standing, seeming unsure of where to sit.
“Can you pass me the remote?” You requested, stretching an arm out towards it but ultimately not reaching it.
“Oh, sure, sure.” He picked it up with ease just like you would, handing it off to you.
“Thanks.” You turned the TV on. He was still standing, so you gestured to the rest of the empty couch. “Sit, Jisung.”
“Right,” he mumbled, taking a seat next to you.
“You haven’t seriously been standing there like that this whole time, have you?”
“I… sit sometimes, yeah.”
“Good.” You patted his arm—or you tried to pat his arm, but instead your hand hit the back of the couch, a cold shiver running up your arm starting at your fingertips. You jerked your hand back in alarm, eyes going wide. “Shit! Sorry! Did I just like, smack your lung or something?”
Jisung laughed hard, his nose scrunching up and his hand flying up to cover his mouth as he giggled. “I’ve never thought of it like that. I don’t—I don’t think so, no.”
“It didn’t like, hurt, did it?”
“No. Feels a little weird, like… Ah, I don’t know how to describe it if you’re still corporeal. But it doesn’t hurt.”
“Okay good,” you breathed out. Looking down at the remote in your hand, you frowned thoughtfully. “How come you could grab this just fine, but I just go through you?”
“It used to happen with objects, too,” he informed you, reaching his hand out towards the coffee table. The ghost moved it down, his hand effortlessly gliding through the table just like yours had gone through him a few moments earlier. “I can control it now. But for some reason, people, I still can’t.”
“That sounds… lonely.”
Jisung shrugged, offering you a sort of sad smile. “Hey, I just spent a few decades not being seen or heard by anybody either. I’ll take what I can get.”
“Alright, what are we feeling?” You hummed as you pulled up the streaming service. “Ghost movie?”
He gave you a skeptical look. “You hate horror movies. You made Hyukjun turn all the lights in the house on when he put ‘Saw’ on.”
“Aw come on, no laugh? Not even a chuckle? Ironic scoff?” You wrinkled your nose at him.
“I’m laughing on the inside.”
“I was very brave for watching it all, though, wouldn’t you agree?” You grinned, grabbing a big spoonful of ice cream.
Jisung’s amused smile was apparent that time. “Very. If I had gold stars to give out, you’d get one.”
“Okay, what about ‘The Batman’? The one with Robert Pattinson, I literally don’t care about the other ones.”
“I’m not sure who that is, but sure.”
“Jisung, I’m about to change your afterlife. Possibly for the worse.”
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From when you woke up to when you went to sleep, if you were at home, Jisung was usually around. You found that you didn’t mind his presence, if anything it was comforting, he made the house feel less empty than it would be with just you and your mother—and occasionally Nayoung. You had to catch yourself from talking to him when your mom or Nayoung were within earshot, or looking too obviously at where he was standing or sitting when they were in the room. Your evenings that you used to spend with Hyukjun were now spent with the ghost, watching shows or movies, showing him your favorite music, or just talking.
This morning, as your mom bathed herself and Nayoung waited for her in her bedroom, just in case, you had some extra time. Which you were glad for, as you knew you were moving slow, feeling more like a zombie than a functioning human being as you prepared breakfast. You yawned, covering your mouth with the back of your hand before gripping the tomato again and continuing your cuts.
“So what—”
“Y/N!” Jisung’s cry of warning came before you registered your tomato juice-slickened fingers slipping down the food and under the blade.
You looked down to see crimson red welling up and joining the tomato’s seeds at the same time you felt coldness on your hands. Jisung had tried to grab you, both too late, and in an ill-fated attempt even if he hadn’t been, as his hands went right through yours. You belatedly hissed as your sleep-slogged mind finally registered the pain, made extra by the sting of tomato juice in the cuts. Jisung swore under his breath as he grabbed a kitchen towel instead, wrapping it around your fingers and pressing hard as his other hand knocked the knife out of your uninjured fingers that were still lamely holding it. He reached over to turn the sink on, and pulled you over there by the grip he had on the towel. He couldn’t move your hand under the water once he took the towel off, though, staring at you pointedly.
“Right,” you mumbled, putting your fingers under the stream of the faucet to rinse the cuts clean of tomato guts. “Thanks, Jisung.”
“What—” He was cut off by the doorbell ringing.
You hurriedly ripped off a wad of paper towels to press to your cut, calling out to Nayoung, “I’ll get it!”
You knew Jisung was following you, not bothering to keep his sighs quiet as you peered through the peephole first—habit. A pit formed in your stomach when you recognized the man standing on your doorstep immediately.
Forcing your features into a pleasantly neutral expression, you opened the door just enough to greet your eldest stepbrother. “Good morning, Seohyuk.”
He fixed you with the same wide, dazzling grin that he always had, one that made you think he should be doing real estate instead of whatever his real job was—investment broker or something. He was in a suit, looking like he had stopped by on his way to work. You bit back the urge to look down at your own lounge clothes and hair still damp from your shower.
“Y/N! Good morning!” He was still beaming. “Looking beautiful as always.”
“Can I help you?” You asked politely, stepping onto the porch and forcing him to back up a step off the welcome mat, keeping one hand on the door handle.
He then seemed to have noticed your hand. “Are you alright? Did you hurt yourself?”
“Nicked myself with a knife in the kitchen just now. I’m fine,” you shrugged off his concerns. “Why are you here?”
“Oh my god! We should go in and get that washed out!” His hands fluttered over you with feigned worry, trying to usher you back into the house, put you stayed put, firmly shutting the front door behind you.
“I already washed it out,” you informed him flatly. “What do you want?”
The expressiveness immediately dropped off his face, and a cool, suave smirk overtook it as he sized you up. “Alright. Big girl can handle herself.”
“We’re both adults, Seohyuk, I’d appreciate it if you can act like one and get to your point.”
“Funny, my dad never seemed to think you were one,” he sneered. “You were the little princess he never got to have.”
“If this is all you came for, I’m going back inside,” you sighed, reaching for the handle again.
“I came to inspect the property.” He finally gave you his reason, holding his chin up. “As is my right, to make sure you’re not letting it go to ruins. So you have to let me in.”
Right, as if the house could’ve fallen to the wayside and become dilapidated in a week. You turned back to him, meeting his gaze head-on. It was easier like this, just one of them. Especially Seohyuk, he didn’t have a temper like his younger brothers, nor did his words cut as deep as his mom’s, he was just… a jerk. You could deal with a jerk.
“And, as I’m sure you saw when you continued reading the papers, you have to give me at least twenty-four hours’ notice before conducting any inspection of the property. So, I will see you in twenty-four hours.” You grabbed the door handle again. “Goodbye, Seohyuk.”
You didn’t wait for his response, rushing inside and slamming the door shut behind you. You locked it up as quick as you could, not wanting to take any chances.
“You’re not seriously going to let him come in here?!” Jisung blurted out, wide eyes focused on you. Of course he heard everything again.
As you opened your mouth to answer, Nayoung stepped out your mom’s room hesitantly, worried eyes focused on you. You turned to her instead, offering her a reassuring smile.
“Is there anything I can do, Y/N?” She asked quietly. You didn’t want to know how much she had heard.
“I’ll try to arrange it so the inspection is during your time. If she’s up for it tomorrow, could you take my mom on a walk? I need to be here, and she really shouldn’t be.”
The aide nodded quickly. “Of course, yes.”
Back in the kitchen, Jisung pulled the first aid kit down, and you applied your own bandages to the cuts on your fingers. You could feel his eyes boring holes into your hair as you bowed your head to pay extra close attention to your injuries.
“Y/N—”
“What did you want me to do, Jisung?” You hissed, not meaning for it to come out as venomous as it did. “They’re entitled to inspect the premises, it’s technically also kind of their house. I would’ve been in bigger shit if I told him no!”
The ghost was quiet, and when you finally looked up, you saw the hurt on his own face. You sighed, throwing away the bloody paper towels and bandage wrappers. Rolling out your shoulders and your neck to relieve the tension that had built up there, you loosely wrapped your arms around yourself.
“I’m sorry,” you said quietly. “I’m not mad at you, none of this is your fault. I’m just… stressed, and I slept like shit last night. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you.”
“It’s okay, Y/N,” he reassured you. “I just… hate the idea of you and that guy being in this house by yourselves, you know? I don’t trust him.”
“Oh, we won’t be alone.”
“I know I’ll be here, but that’s not the same as having someone who could actually do something.”
“I know you’ll be here, and that’s reassuring,” you replied, an amused smile playing at your lips. “But that’s not entirely what I meant.”
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“Mr. Shin, thank you for coming on such short notice,” you greeted the attorney with a polite bow, welcoming him into the house.
Mr. Shin was an older man, around Hyukjun’s age, with salt and pepper hair, who hastily returned the bow. He wore a simple black suit, white dress shirt, and black tie, thick-framed glasses perched on his nose, and he held his black briefcase tightly to his side. He was exactly as you pictured him from speaking to him on the phone yesterday—when you picked up Hyukjun’s papers, you’d only dealt with his secretary.
“Of course, Ms. Y/L/N, it’s my duty,” he replied briskly. “Your stepbrother has not arrived yet, has he?”
“No, I’m expecting Seohyuk in a few minutes.”
“Good, good.”
“Would you like some coffee? Or tea?”
“No, thank you, I couldn’t intrude.” He shook his head fervently. “Your mother isn’t home, is she?”
“She stepped out for a walk just before you arrived. She doesn’t need to be here, does she?”
“No, no, not at all.” He seemed relieved at this news, if anything.
The doorbell rang then, and you smiled at the lawyer. “That should be him.”
Looking out the peephole first, it was in fact Seohyuk. You opened the door wider than yesterday, offering him a polite smile. “Good morning, Seohyuk.”
“Alright, Y/N, it’s been twenty-four hours, let me in.” He skipped pleasantries entirely, a glare already on his features.
“Of course.” You obliged gracefully, opening the door all the way for him.
He obviously hadn’t seen anybody else, as he faltered upon stepping inside and spotting Mr. Shin in the entryway. It was as if a magic spell had been cast on him, Seohyuk straightened up, adjusting his own tie and throwing on his charming smile, offering a hand out to him. “Kim Seohyuk, nice to meet you.”
Mr. Shin once again bowed formally, ignoring the hand in front of him. “Attorney Shin. I’m the lawyer in charge of your father’s estate, and I’ll be overseeing this inspection.”
“Great. Yeah, I’m glad Y/N remembered to call you like we talked about,” Seohyuk lied through his teeth, keeping his voice casual. “She’s been a little all over the place with taking care of her mom by herself since Dad passed, so I offered to, but she insisted she would do it since she only works part-time now.”
You clenched your jaw to not call him a piss-poor liar to his face. Or punch him in the face. His ‘she’s a mess, but we love her’ tone really irked you. Jisung had been lurking in the corner the whole time with his arms crossed over his chest and chose now to mimic choking Seohyuk—it took everything in you not to burst out laughing, but it successfully dissolved the anger that had been bubbling in your veins.
Mr. Shin either didn’t believe him or didn’t care, as he simply nodded and then looked to the both of you. “If there are no questions, we will begin in the kitchen.”
The inspection was uneventful—you passed with flying colors, of course—and at the end, you got to see both Mr. Shin and Seohyuk out at the front door simultaneously.
“I will be making note of this in the estate’s file, of course,” Mr. Shin said in closing. “So as to not intrude on Ms. Y/L/N and her mother too much, inspections are limited to once per year, as you know.”
“What?!” Seohyuk’s jaw dropped. “Th-That’s per person, right? Like, if my brothers wanted an inspection—”
“I’m afraid not, Mr. Kim. One inspection of the property per year. Unless good cause is shown.”
“Good cause? Like what?”
“If there is some damage externally that would lead you to believe Ms. Y/L/N has caused similar damage internally, or if she posted pictures to her social media of the inside that showed some damage. Something like that.”
You had to cover your mouth to keep from laughing in Seohyuk’s face as his jaw gaped open like a dead fish. After composing yourself, you gave the both of them a cheerful wave. “So I guess I’ll see you two next year.”
“And hopefully not any sooner!” Mr. Shin confirmed, bowing deeply once more.
You closed the door with a satisfying click. Turning back around to Jisung, you finally burst into laughter with him. He pumped his fist victoriously. “Gone until next year!”
Holding your hand up, you cheered, “Whoo! Come on, ghost five!”
Jisung whooshed his hand through yours, and the chill zipping up your arm only served to make you more excited. Finally, a win in all this.
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3:16 a.m.
You glared at your bedside clock like it was doing this to you personally. Rolling onto your other side, you let out a disgruntled sigh. No matter how comfortable you were, how exhausted your bones and your brain were, you couldn’t fucking sleep. Sitting up, you threw your covers off of you and padded out of your room.
In the kitchen, you drank a glass of water, but couldn’t bring yourself to go back upstairs to your room. You wandered into the living room, plopping into your usual corner of the couch and pulling your knees to your chest. Turning your phone on, you once again glared at the time like it was invented to hurt you in particular.
3:20 a.m.
You could be doing something better right now, reading a book, laying very still with your eyes closed, meditating, anything but scrolling on your phone.
3:49 a.m.
Had you ever gotten a good night’s sleep in your life? You couldn’t remember in that moment. Your eyes stung looking at the screen, they stung when you closed them, but you blinked it away.
4:17 a.m.
“Y/N?” Jisung stepped into the living room. “Why are you still up?”
“Mm, Jisung, hey,” you greeted him dully, setting your phone aside on the arm of the couch. “I’m surprised it took you this long to find me.”
“I figured you were just getting a glass of water or something. I didn’t want to bother you. But you’ve been out here for almost an hour now.”
You sighed, resting your chin on your knees. “Can’t sleep.”
“Is something wrong?”
“I slept for a couple hours, but then I woke up and I just... couldn’t go back to sleep,” you sighed.
“Staring at that screen isn’t going to help you get back to sleep.” He frowned.
That made you chuckle. “And how do you know that?”
“Your mom used to get on your stepdad about using screens too close to bedtime,” he confessed. “Something about the light keeping your brain awake.”
You smiled as you could imagine that perfectly. “Yeah, that sounds like her.”
“Can I do anything to help? Do you want like, hot chocolate? Or…” He trailed off as he was clearly wracking his brain for another option.
“You want to keep me off my phone?”
He nodded.
You stood up, your fingers tapping over the spines on the bookcases before you grabbed one. You offered it out to Jisung. “Read to me.”
Jisung gently took the book from you, then nodded to the couch. “Sure. Lay down.”
“I’m not sleeping on the couch,” you snorted, taking your phone back off the arm and heading for the stairs. Tilting your head indicatively, you said, “Come on, you get to go to the second floor.”
His footsteps were quiet behind you, squeaking some of the same steps that you did as he followed you up the stairs. You opened the door to your bedroom, stepping in first and holding it open to gesture him in as he had stopped uncertainly by the threshold. Closing the door behind him, you then sat down on your bed again.
“Here.” You patted the empty side of the bed for him.
Jisung shuffled over, sitting up against the headboard with his long legs stretched out on top of your sheets. With amusement, you noted that he was no longer wearing his dark shoes, only black socks. You laid back down under your covers again, pulling your blankets up to your chin.
He clicked the lamp on his side of the bed on, and seemed to have read the title for the first time then. “Poems?”
“My mom used to read to me every night, way past the normal age that you stop doing that stuff I’m pretty sure. And whenever I got nightmares, or couldn’t sleep, I’d climb into her bed. It didn’t matter if I woke her up at two in the morning, she’d grab one of the five or ten books that were always on her nightstand and start reading to me until I fell asleep,” you explained, readjusting your pillow under your head. “That was one of my favorites. I figured it was worth a shot.”
Jisung opened the book to the first poem and began reading. His voice was soft and steady, deep and soothing. Despite your want to keep watching him and the focused look on his face as he read, his dark eyes following the words on the page, your own eventually fluttered shut against your will.
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When you woke up, Jisung was no longer in your room. The book was resting on the nightstand on that side of the bed, and the lamp was off. Upon entering the kitchen, you saw Jisung standing at the humming microwave. He perked up when you walked in, despite the confused look on your face.
“Good morning!” He said brightly, then gestured to the microwave. “I’m making you hot chocolate. I heard the shower.”
“And if my mother had walked in and saw the hot chocolate making itself?” You asked dryly, still rubbing sleep out of your eyes. Your shower didn’t do much to wake you up this morning.
Jisung visually deflated, looking around guiltily. “Oh. Right…”
“It’s sweet, Jisung, thank you,” you added with a smile, watching his shoulders relax. “You’re very sweet. I just don’t want to give my mom a heart attack.”
“Of course.” He was smiling again too. “Sorry.”
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Sitting halfway down the stairs with Jisung, you stared blankly at the front door. Dinner had been difficult for your mom tonight, and with no Nayoung at that meal, you had to do it all on your own. She was asleep now, and you held your head in your hands. Jisung was quietly sitting beside you, resting his elbows on his knees as his laced and unlaced his fingers in front of him. This was probably one of the best parts about having Jisung around. Despite being practically omnipresent at this point, if you didn’t want to talk, he didn’t talk. If you wanted to chat, he would talk to you about anything, but if you wanted utter silence, he would let you sit in utter silence—he just wouldn’t let you do it alone.
You felt nearly suffocated by the house in that moment, but you couldn’t leave your mom alone.
“Can you go outside?” You lifted your head to ask Jisung.
“Not very far,” he answered as if you were asking any other piece of trivia about him and his predicament.
“The porch swing?”
“Yes, I can go there.”
“Do you want to? Now? With me?”
He chuckled softly. “When have I ever told you no?”
It was a warm night, which you were glad for as you were only in your sleep shorts and a t-shirt as you sat on the wooden porch swing with Jisung. Holding the chain next to your head with one hand, you peered out at the nighttime around you, glad to be out of those walls finally.
“Pretty moon,” you commented, looking up at the silver half-moon above you.
“Mhm,” Jisung hummed his agreement.
“And stars,” you added, taking in the twinkling dots all around the moon.
“Mhm.”
“Pretty stars,” you clarified.
“Mhm.”
Looking at Jisung out of the corner of your eye, you kept the same tone of voice as you said, “Pretty garbage can.”
“Mhm.”
“Jisung?”
“Mhm?”
“You’re not listening to me.”
“Huh?”
“What are you thinking about?”
“Uhm… nothing.” He coughed. “Pretty moon.”
“Mhm.” You hummed back in the same sing-songy tone that he had. “I wish I could touch you.”
“Huh?” He spluttered out.
“Just feels like a nice moment to rest my head in your lap, don’t you think?” You looked over at him, meeting his dark eyes.
He looked down at his legs, then around him in what you would almost call an attempt to avoid your gaze. “Well… we could put one of the pillows on the swing where my lap is, and you can rest your head there and pretend it’s me.”
“That won’t be uncomfortable for you?”
“No, I’ll be fine,” he promised. “Just make sure it’s not too far over here, I don’t want to make you cold.”
After you settled onto your back with your head on a pillow, right on the edge of where Jisung’s thigh started, you could see Jisung and the porch roof directly above you. The corner of his mouth twitched as he looked down at you, and you smiled back up at him.
“Can you push the porch swing?” You requested.
“Sure,” he agreed, and you felt the swing gently push off backwards then sail forward.
You rolled your head to the side to be able to look at the moon again.
“Can I ask…” You poked your tongue on the inside of your cheek. “How did you die? If you want to tell me, you don’t have to.”
Jisung sighed. “I don’t know. I went to sleep one night and when I woke up, I wasn’t in my body anymore.”
You felt your eyes widen involuntarily. “Seriously? You weren’t sick or anything?”
“I felt fine,” he confirmed. “I didn’t even realize until I couldn’t grab the handle to open my bedroom door and leave. My hand just went through it. When I turned back around to my bed, I saw myself lying there. I thought I was still dreaming.”
“God... I’m sorry, Jisung.”
He shrugged, his fingers messing with the edges of the pillow that your head was on. “It could’ve been worse. It didn’t hurt, I wasn’t dreading the end or anything.”
You reached for his face, despite knowing that it wouldn’t work, holding your hand up as if you were cupping his cheek, hovering right on the edge of where your skin passed through each other. “Does that... I always feel cold when I try to touch you. Is this warm? To you?”
“I never notice that I’m cold until I touch you.” He hesitantly put his hand over yours. “Like when you’ve been outside during winter for so long that you don’t even feel temperature anymore. And then you step inside again and you can suddenly feel just how cold you are because everything else is so warm.”
“Is it… I don’t know, nice?”
“It’s… a lot,” he admitted. “It’s not bad, but I can never warm up.”
“Oh.” You took your hand back, resting it on your stomach.
“It’s late,” he said quietly. “Are you tired?”
“No, but I should probably head to bed.” You sat up reluctantly.
Only a few minutes after saying your goodnights, you were at the bottom of the stairs again, searching for Jisung. You found him in the living room.
“Can you read to me?” You asked, fidgeting with the sleeves of your shirt.
He chose a book off the shelves and followed you upstairs wordlessly. Back under your covers again, you listened to the sound of his fingers running over the edges of the pages, folding back the cover of the book before he started reading. It wasn’t the same book of poems as last time, instead you fondly recognized it as one of your favorite books from when you started reading novels as a kid, about a young girl who went on a grand fantasy adventure with all sorts of magical creatures. In the back of your mind, you thought to yourself that you were a little disappointed that you’d be asleep before the end, when she finally came home to her mother in the real world. That had always been your favorite part.
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“Do cameras work on you?” You asked Jisung as you kneeled by one of the flowerbeds at the front of the house. It was early in the morning, and you made sure to keep one headphone in your ear so that any passerby who did happen by on morning walks or jogs would hopefully just think that you were on a phone call.
“Don’t know,” he shrugged, sitting on the porch swing. “I think I would’ve found out if I was in the background of any Kim family photos over the years.”
Curious, you took out your phone, opening up the camera and pointing it at him. The sun hadn’t fully risen yet, but in the low light you could see the porch swing just fine, seemingly rocking along on its own on your screen. Taking just one picture, you paused your weeding to look at it from your camera roll. Again, you definitely couldn’t see Jisung sitting on the porch swing like you could with your own two eyes, but there was something going on in the picture this time. The air seemed to shimmer and distort in the vague shape of a person sitting in the photo, exactly where he was in real life. You zoomed in on the fuzzy edges that nearly turned into shadow, squinting as you tried to make out whether the distortion was in the image file itself or part of Jisung somehow.
“Well?” Jisung questioned, tilting his head.
“I got... something.” You stood up, walking over to show him. “It’s not what I see when I look at you. I see, like, a person.”
“Oh.” His face fell as he looked over the photo of the strange figure.
“I think it’s cool,” you tried to cheer him up. “Very mysterious, you know.”
He gave you a half-hearted smile. “Thanks, Y/N.”
“I get why you’re bummed, though. It’s probably been a while since you’ve seen yourself, right? I never see your shadow or your reflection. Can you?”
“No, I can’t.” He shook his head. “It’s… I have my dad’s nose, and my mom’s smile. I just thought that even if I couldn’t see them anymore, it’d be nice to see the parts of them that are in me.”
You blinked back the tears that were pricking at your eyes. “I know what you mean. My dad’s mom was alive when I was younger, and she always said I looked just like him. I used to sit on my bathroom counter in front of the mirror with an old picture of him from when he was a kid for hours to try to see it too.”
“Do you look like him?” He asked quietly.
“Don’t you see it? I look just like my mom,” you laughed and shook your head.
Jisung chuckled softly, rubbing the back of his neck. “Yeah, I know. I wasn’t going to spoil your connection to your dad for you.”
“It makes me happy to know that my grandmother saw my dad when she looked at me anyway.” You permanently deleted the photo you’d taken of Jisung. “I’m sure you have something else from your parents that you don’t need a mirror for, though. Like, for me, when I laugh really, really hard, I start wheezing—it’s honestly an awful sound—and clutch my sides and stomp my left foot. My dad would laugh with his whole body like that too. I didn’t even know until my mom pointed it out a few years ago out of the blue. I sneeze like Hyukjun now, too. Don’t even know how I picked that up in such a short time. I was dusting the other day and when I sneezed, I realized it sounded just like him.”
“Really?” He laughed, a real one this time.
“Yeah,” you smiled fondly at the memory. “I’m sure you’ve got lots of pieces of your family in you other than your nose and your eyes, Jisung.”
The ghost held your gaze, his dark eyes that you tried to imagine belonging to some ambiguous father of his that you could never recall, smiling up at you with a smile that matched a memory of his mother you didn’t have. Even if you would never know them, you remembered them in that moment for him.
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You chewed on your bottom lip as you leafed through the large tome of local genealogies in front of you. At first you were worried that Mr. Shin would have questions for you as to why you wanted information on the deed of the house, primarily who had owned it before your stepdad bought it. But instead, he simply had his paralegal fetch the information from the previous title search they’d done when drafting the documents for Hyukjun. You took the list of names with you to the local library, where they kept an archive of all sorts of birth, death, and marriage records, including genealogies of local families.
Kim Hyukjun had purchased the home from a husband and wife, the Parks, decades before you were even born. The Parks were the first owners, and despite neither of their names being Jisung, you figured he must be related to them in some way to have lived there before Hyukjun bought it; their son, a nephew, grandson, something.
You finally found a married couple whose names matched, and eagerly read on for their children. They had one child, a son, Park Jisung—deceased.
“Found you,” you whispered to yourself, tapping the name in the book. Taking a picture of all the relevant information, you shut the book and returned it to its place before taking down another one, death certificates.
Finally landing on Jisung’s, you read with bated breath and a morbid curiosity. It started with all the normal stuff—name, age, date of birth, address—and you skimmed on, trying to find the thing that you really wanted to know. But as you got to the end, and desperately re-read again from the beginning, more carefully this time, you realized there was no cause of death listed. They must not have requested an autopsy. As your chest deflated, you shook your head at yourself. What would knowing even change now? You took a quick note of the cemetery listed before shutting the book.
The information—or lack thereof—that you’d gotten from the library was still on your mind when you returned to the house. Nayoung was sitting at the kitchen table, and looked up from her phone when you came in.
“Ah, Y/N, how were your errands?” She asked, clearly noticing your empty hands.
“Fine,” you gave a non-committal answer. “Where’s my mom?”
“She’s taking a nap in her room. She’s been asleep for about fifteen minutes or so.”
“Good.” You glanced at the time on the stove. “You can head out for the day. Thank you, Nayoung.”
“I’ll see you all tomorrow, then.” She stood up and flashed you one more bright smile before showing herself out.
A few moments later, you heard the sound of the front door locking after her, then Jisung entered the room from that direction. He stopped next to you.
“So where’d you go today?” He asked curiously. “You didn’t pick anything up…”
You sighed, taking a seat at the kitchen table. “Library. They didn’t have what I needed.”
“What book were you looking for?”
You grimaced at yourself, picking at your nails uncomfortably as you braced yourself to tell the truth. “I wasn’t checking out a book. I was… I was looking up stuff in the archives, about you.”
Jisung’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Me?”
“I’m sorry, I was nosy and shouldn’t have done that without talking to you first,” you apologized. “I’m sorry.”
“Y/N, you’ve got a ghost living in your house,” he reminded you frankly. “Normal personal boundaries aren’t really applicable here.”
“I… guess that’s one way to look at it.”
“And I mean, all you did was look in the archives, right?”
“Yeah.”
“That’s fine.” Jisung sat in his chair next to yours, leaning forward towards you eagerly. “What did you find out?”
You chewed your lip nervously. “Not much. I know your full name is Park Jisung. Your parents didn’t have an autopsy done, so we still don’t know why you… passed. I know where they buried… you, though.”
He kept looking at you expectantly, waiting for you to say more. But that was all you had. When he realized that you were done, his face fell, and he let out a breath, sitting back in his chair.
“Oh.” He nodded slowly.
“I’m sorry, Jisung.” You instinctively reached for his hand that was resting on the table. You did a double-take when your hand didn’t impact with the wooden tabletop under him, though, but with him.
Jisung’s hand was cool to the touch, but solid, yours didn’t just slip right through it like usual. You stared down at your hands as you readjusted your grip in disbelief.
Your ghost was similarly bewildered, eyes locked on your hands as he squeezed yours back. “Are you…”
“Yeah, I can actually touch you!” You laughed in amazement.
He looked up from your hand to your eyes, lifting his other hand towards your face. “Can I…?”
You nodded, not trusting yourself to speak, or even breathe, in that moment.
Jisung’s fingertips gently caressed your cheek, his eyes filled with wonder as he murmured, “You’re so warm…”
“Are you… you know, cold? Is it like before?”
“No, it’s-it’s nice,” he said, clasping your hand with both of his now. “Thank you. For letting me…”
“Oh, sure, yeah,” you cleared your throat awkwardly, looking around the kitchen.
“It’s funny, it’s one of those things you take for granted until you can’t do it anymore.”
“What?”
“Touch people.” He squeezed your hand softly. “I used to complain when my mom would kiss me, or my friends would give me hugs. Now… I can’t believe I’m holding someone’s hand again.”
You patted his arm, at a loss for words, but hoping that you could give him some kind of comfort in the moment. It sounded like a heartbreakingly lonely existence. You couldn’t imagine what you would do if you could never hug your mom again, or even bump into strangers on the train—small things that reminded you that you were real, that you took up space.
You felt your heart truly shatter when Jisung leaned over, pressing his forehead to your linked hands, and you saw his shoulders shake with quiet sobs.
“Oh, Jisung,” you whispered, scooting your chair closer to gently stroke his dark hair. “It’s okay…”
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Tonight had been rough. This was the third night in a row that you had gone in circles trying to calm your mother down from a frightened state, afraid that every creak of the house settling, gust of the air conditioning rustling a curtain, or wind blowing a tree branch outside was a ghost. Despite being aware that your house was actually inhabited by a ghost, you knew it wasn’t Jisung doing any of those things.
You had finally gotten her back to sleep at almost one in the morning, and shut her bedroom door behind you with a sigh. Shuffling into the kitchen, you stopped in the middle of the room, rubbing a hand over your face as you just stared blankly at the countertop. You couldn’t even remember what you had come in here for.
“Hey,” Jisung called for your attention softly, his quiet footsteps approaching from behind you. “Did you want water? Hot chocolate?”
“Ugh, I don’t even know,” you groaned, turning around and burying your face in his shoulder. “I’m so fucking tired, Jisung.”
“Then let’s get you to bed,” he suggested, trying to usher you out of the kitchen, but you didn’t budge.
Looking up at him, you sniffled, “This is the third night this has happened… I don’t know if I can… What if I can’t—What if—What am I—What if I can’t do it by myself? What if I can’t take care of her like she needs on my own? She’s only going to get worse and I’m… Oh God, I’m tired.”
Tears streamed down your cheeks now as you felt an exhaustion from deep within. You felt it in every fiber of your being, in your bones, deep in your chest. You couldn’t remember a time when you didn’t feel worn out like this.
Jisung’s eyes widened as his hands frantically fluttered over your arms and shoulders, clearly unsure of where to settle as he went to try to comfort you. “Ah, Y/N, oh, no. Oh, God, I’m so sorry that you feel so tired. You’re doing so good.” He squeezed your shoulders. “You’re not alone. I know it can feel like that, but you’ve got Nayoung, too. Your stepdad left a fund to pay for your mom’s care, right? You can use that to have Nayoung here more if you need her to, can’t you? I’ve heard her ask if you want to adjust her schedule…”
“Yeah, she has,” you nodded, the admission only making you cry harder. “I just—I don’t want to think about needing more help, about needing Nayoung more, because that really means that she’s getting worse. But I can’t—She needs more than me.”
“I’m so sorry, Y/N,” Jisung said, his own eyes shining in the dim light. “I wish I could make everything better for you.”
You gave him a shaky smile, the best you could muster in the moment, patting one of his hands that were still holding you by the shoulders. “I know. Thank you, just having you here to listen to me means a lot.”
He wiped at your tears with his thumbs, his hands shaking slightly as he gently cradled your face. “Let me help you however I can—you know, without freaking your mom out. You can take care of your mom and I’ll take care of you. Please.”
It was all you could do to nod your head in his hands. He let out a breath of relief.
“Come on, let’s get you back to bed.” He wrapped an arm around your shoulders, guiding you out of the kitchen successfully this time.
At the top of the stairs, you stopped and grabbed his hand, pleading, “Don’t leave me, Jisung.”
He chuckled lightly, lacing his fingers with yours. “Where could I even go? I’m stuck here.”
“I mean, you always leave after I fall asleep,” you explained. “Don’t go this time.”
He nodded, using the index finger of the hand that was holding yours to trace an X over his heart, pulling your hand along with it. “I won’t leave you.”
You fell asleep curled up under your covers, Jisung reading a book of short stories to you, one of his hands resting on your head, fingers gently carding through your hair—a silent reminder of his promise that he would still be there in the morning.
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When you woke up, you felt terrible. Not only because of how poorly you had slept lately, but all of your joints and muscles ached, your sinuses felt like they were stuffed up with concrete, your throat was scratchy and sore, and it felt like someone had turned the thermostat up to a million degrees. You winced as you rolled over and threw the covers off of you, already feeling that your sheets and clothes were damp with sweat. Groaning and clutching your head, you involuntarily coughed, having to prop yourself up on your elbow to avoid choking on your own mucus. Gross.
“You’re sick,” Jisung said from the other side of the bed, his voice sympathetic. You’d forgotten that he was even there, actually.
Sitting up, you tried to look as normal as possible, shaking your head. “No, just had something in my throat.”
You winced at the sound of your own voice; it sounded almost as bad as you felt.
“Y/N, you sound awful,” he pointed out. “And you were tossing and turning all night.”
“I’m fine—”
“Y/N.” He was giving you what could only be called a stern pout. “We just talked about this last night.”
You opened your mouth to argue again, but faltered at the intensity of his gaze. Letting the tension fall from your shoulders, you grabbed your phone off your nightstand. “I’ll see if Nayoung or another aide can stay all day.”
Jisung finally smiled at that, standing up and moving to leave the room. “I’ll make you breakfast before your mom wakes up.”
You watched him walk to your door, and instead of grabbing the handle to open it, walked right through it. That must be why you were never woken by the sound of the door when he would leave in the middle of the night before.
Once Nayoung arrived, you hauled yourself out of bed and to the doctor’s office. As soon as you got back, you trudged right back upstairs. From the living room, you could hear the sounds of your mother and the aide chatting. In your room, you shrugged off your jacket and had just grabbed the hem of your shirt when Jisung appeared through the door.
“So what did—”
“Ah!” You yelped, yanking your shirt back down and whirling around to stare at him incredulously.
“Sorry! Sorry!” Jisung sputtered out, covering his eyes.
“Knock! I know you can!” You yelled, gesturing at the door with exasperation. “What is wrong with you?!”
“I didn’t think—I’m sorry!” He fully backed up and out of your room through a solid wall, still covering his eyes.
A few moments later, you heard soft footsteps accompanied by creaks on the stairs. Nayoung’s voice came next, “Y/N? Are you okay?”
“Oh, yeah, Nayoung, I’m fine,” you called back. “Just stubbed my toe getting dressed.”
“Alright…” She didn’t sound like she believed you, but apparently wasn’t going to press the issue. “I have another visit to make today, so another aide from the service will be here in the afternoon to take over from me. Her name is Hyesoo.”
“Okay, thanks for letting me know.”
“I’ll say goodbye when I leave.”
“Thanks.”
You heard her retreat down the stairs, and finished getting changed in peace. Sitting down on your bed, you then heard a soft knock at your bedroom door.
“Come in,” you replied, crossing your arms over your chest.
Jisung stepped through the door, averting his eyes to his feet guiltily. “Sorry...”
“Forget about it, Jisung,” you sighed, flopping all the way under your covers. “I’m too sick to be mad at you.”
“What did the doctor say?” He asked, perching on the edge of your bed.
“It’s just a cold, but he said that all the stress I’m under isn’t helping,” you huffed, fluffing up your pillow under your head. “He gave me some meds, they’re in my bag.”
Jisung picked up your tote bag from where you’d dropped it by your nightstand, handing it to you. “I’ll get you some water to take them with.”
After he’d left the room, you set two of the bottles on your nightstand, and tucked the third in the drawer. Your ghost came back soon with a glass of water, and you eyed him suspiciously as he gave it to you.
“Nobody saw the floating glass of water?” You questioned, sitting up to be able to properly take a sip.
“Your mom and Nayoung were in the backyard,” he confirmed, watching you knock back the pills. “Are you hungry?”
You shook your head, shuffling back under the covers. “Sleepy. That doctor’s visit took a lot out of me.”
“Take a nap.”
“Will you wake me up before Nayoung goes?”
“Sure. But sleep right now.”
You were faintly aware of Jisung’s cool hand resting on your head as you let yourself get swept away by sleep.
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Blinking your eyes open, you were greeted by the inky blackness of your ghost’s eyes first. Jisung was laying on top of the covers on the other half of your bed, cheek resting on his hand as he gazed at you. You rubbed the sleep out of your eyes as you rolled onto your back, suddenly feeling much warmer under the intensity of his eyes.
“The other aide just arrived, Nayoung is getting ready to leave,” he informed you quietly.
“Mm,” you grunted in acknowledgment. “Thanks.”
“How are you feeling?”
“Still feel like shit,” you admitted. “The doctor did say the meds wouldn’t start working until the second or third dose.”
You heard footsteps coming up the stairs, and both you and Jisung went quiet. There was a soft knock at your door.
“Y/N?” Nayoung said your name quietly.
“Yes, Nayoung?” You replied.
“I’m heading out. Hyesoo and your mom are in the living room. There’s an extra serving of lunch, would you like me to bring it up for you?”
You were hungry now, and against your instincts, agreed, “If you don’t mind.”
“Of course not. I’ll warm it up for you, give me a few minutes.”
You stared up at the ceiling bitterly, trying to swallow down the uncomfortable, shameful bile rising up in your body. You don’t have to do everything yourself, you can accept people’s kindness, you can let people help you. This was exactly what you were getting upset with Hyukjun for doing, putting others before himself at the detriment of his own health. If you didn’t take care of yourself, your mom wouldn’t have any family left to take care of her—only Hyukjun’s fund to pay for more aides.
“Y/N, I’m setting it down outside your room,” Nayoung’s voice was back outside your door, startling you. You hadn’t even heard the stairs this time. “I made you some tea, too. I hope you feel better. See you tomorrow.”
You were out of your bed and opening the door before Jisung could. Nayoung was still on the top step, and looked over her shoulder, clearly a little startled. You looked down at the plate of food and steaming mug of tea, recognizing it as Hyukjun’s favorite coffee cup. Tears suddenly filled your eyes, but you didn’t move to hug her, knowing that she’d be visiting more elderly and possibly immunocompromised patients today. Instead, you stayed put in the doorway, giving her a small smile.
“Thank you, Nayoung.” You couldn’t string together any more words than that, but she seemed to get it anyway.
She beamed back at you, her young features holding a gentle understanding and wisdom. “You’re welcome. Rest well, Y/N.”
After getting ready for sleep that evening, you were sitting with your feet hanging over the side of the bed, taking your next doses of medications. You took the two on the nightstand, then pulled open the drawer to fish out the one that you had put away earlier. The nap you’d taken earlier had thrown off your sleeping pattern, you weren’t near tired enough despite the time.
“Y/N?” Jisung lightly touched your shoulder. “Everything okay?”
You were staring at the orange pill bottle in your hands, gnawing on your bottom lip. “What if I can’t see you?”
“What?”
“He gave me stuff to help me sleep.” You looked up from the bottle to your ghost. “But what if I take it and I can’t see you anymore?”
Jisung sat down next to you, shoulder-to-shoulder, and took the bottle from you. He turned it over in his hands as he spoke, “You could see me before you started having problems sleeping, right?”
You thought about this for a moment, then slowly nodded, relieved.
“And even if you took these and couldn’t see me anymore for some reason—I would rather you be well than see me,” he said, pushing the bottle back into your hand and wrapping your fingers around it. He held your eye contact sincerely. “Okay?”
You swallowed the lump in your throat and nodded. “Okay…”
Jisung watched silently as you opened the bottle, shook one out into your palm, closed the bottle back up, and knocked the tablet back with some water. He stood up to move to his usual spot against the headboard, grabbing the book that was sitting on the nightstand. You crawled under the covers, watching him open the book to where he left off.
“Jisung?”
“Yes?” He turned his gaze from the pages to you.
“Will you—” You sniffled, rubbing at one of your eyes as you yawned. “Will you just lay with me?”
“Oh. Sure.” He closed the book back up and set it aside, then laid down on top of the covers facing you. “Do you want the lamp off?”
“Mhm… please…”
He reached behind him to turn the light off, plunging the room into darkness. You could barely make out the outline of him from a strip of moonlight filtering in from a gap between the curtains. Your eyes were getting heavier, and you desperately fought to keep them open, just in case this was the last time you could see him.
“Goodnight, Y/N,” Jisung murmured. He crossed his finger over his heart. “I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Goodnight, Jisung,” you managed to mumble back as your eyes fluttered shut.
When you woke up, you were face-to-face with Jisung, his eyes shut this time, eyelashes resting delicately on his cheeks. You would’ve almost felt bad for what you were about to do, but you didn’t think that ghosts actually needed sleep, so you threw your arms around his neck, burying your face in his chest.
“Y/N?!” Jisung squeaked, freezing up under you. “What’s—”
“I can see you!” You cheered victoriously, your voice muffled by his shirt.
He let out a sigh of relief, one of his hands tentatively patting your back. “And a good morning to you, too.”
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It was a couple weeks later, and you were all better. Just in time for winter, too. You let out a huff as you heaved your groceries up the porch steps, your breath coming out as a puff in the cold air. Unlocking the front door, you grinned when it was immediately opened for you, Jisung on the other side. He closed it behind you, taking your hat off you and brushing stray snowflakes from your hair, his brow furrowed in concentration. You mouthed a ‘thank you’ to him, well aware of the sounds of your mother and her new evening aide, Hyesoo, in the kitchen already. He just smiled and murmured “You’re welcome” back.
“Oh, Y/N, back already, dear?” Hyesoo greeted you brightly as you walked into the kitchen. The two of them were playing cards at the kitchen table. Hyesoo was an older woman, closer to your mom and Hyukjun in age, but insisted on you calling her by her first name nevertheless.
“Yep, just had one stop to make today!” You informed them, putting your bags onto the kitchen counters. “I think the snow kept everyone away, too.”
“It was snowing?” Your mom questioned, the disapproval clear in her tone. “You didn’t walk all the way there, did you?”
“I wore all my layers, Mom, promise,” you chuckled, beginning to unpack the groceries. “And my snow boots!”
“I’ll put those away,” Hyesoo insisted, setting her cards down and standing up. “You go warm up, we’ve got a fire going in the living room.”
“Well, I do have some work to get done before dinner...” You said sheepishly. “Thanks, Hyesoo!”
You took the stairs two at a time up to your room to get your laptop, then ran back down to sit in front of the fire with it. Opening up your email first, you were unsurprised when a familiar figure sat down beside you, holding his hands out towards the flames. You hummed to yourself as you answered a couple emails, marking some under your to-do list to deal with later, getting the easier ones out of the way first.
“Ugh, not him again,” Jisung complained from next to you, having been reading them over your shoulder. “Decline!”
You elbowed him with an eyeroll, whispering under your breath, “He’s my boss, I can’t decline a meeting with him.”
“He’s not technically your boss.”
“Okay, supervisor. Still, I can’t decline a meeting with him.”
“They’re never about anything important.”
“Yeah, that’s every meeting ever.”
“He’s just doing it to talk to you. It’s an abuse of power.”
“We’re working on a project together and he’s actually in the office and I’m not. He gives me updates. It’s helpful.”
Jisung made a ‘hrrmph’ sound, pulling his knees to his chest as he opted to stare into the fire instead. You looked at him out of the corner of your eye, mild amusement on your features.
“What? Are you jealous or something?” You teased. “He’s like, married with three kids. Have I not mentioned that? He just doesn’t know how to use computers so he makes everything a video call meeting.”
“Oh.”
“Jealous, jealous...” You said in a sing-song voice. “I already spend almost 24/7 with you, what more could you want?”
You had meant it to be rhetorical, but you swore Jisung’s mouth opened, about to answer, when Hyesoo walked in.
“Hey, I’m going to start on dinner, unless you had something planned?” She pointed to the kitchen over her shoulder.
“No, no, go for it,” you waved her off. “I have to take a call anyway. If I’m late, start without me.”
“Weren’t you just on one?”
So you hadn’t been as quiet as you’d hoped.
“Yeah, different department,” you fibbed quickly, getting to your feet and bringing your laptop with you.
You could hear the soft footfalls of Jisung following you, and at the top of the stairs, you turned around to put a hand on his chest, satisfied that Hyesoo wouldn’t be able to see you here. Jisung pouted, looking down at the hand you had on his chest.
“Work call,” you whispered, gently pushing him back. “Wait downstairs. Please.”
He nodded, not looking very happy about it, but descended the stairs anyway. It’s not like there was anything that happened on your work calls that Jisung couldn’t hear, but you didn’t want to risk a floating object in the background, you looking over at Jisung, or otherwise reacting to him in any way during one of your work calls. It was just easier to concentrate without him there.
The call with your supervisor once again really could’ve been an email, but you didn’t mind catching up with him after you got through the two or three minutes of real work conversation that you had. He was a younger guy, and had been one of the people that you were friendlier with when you actually worked in the office full-time. He filled you in on how his three kids were doing, as well as his wife, who you would always chat with at office social events. He asked about how your mom was doing, and you did inform him that she needed aides in two shifts now, to which he reminded you that if you needed to adjust your schedule or workload, that could be discussed. You appreciated that, but if your workload was any lighter, you wouldn’t be employed, and you needed money. The fund from Hyukjun paid for your mother’s medical care, but you still needed to cover the rest of your living expenses like food, utility bills, incidentals, and yourself.
“And you know those staff dinners that get put on your calendar aren’t just to say we invited everyone,” your supervisor added. “You really are wanted there. We know it’s difficult with your mom, but everyone still talks about you.”
You smiled to yourself. “Thanks. Her evening aide is going to be staying the night a few days a week now, so I might be able to make it out one of these days.”
“No pressure, Y/N. Just wanted to let you know,” he leaned back in his own office chair, and seemed to take a glance at the time for the first time in a while. “Sorry, I’ve kept you for a while.”
“It’s fine, Mr. Choi,” you reassured him. “I always enjoy our chats. Give your family my best, will you?”
“Oh! I’m late for dinner!” He suddenly shot up straight in his chair. “Thanks, Y/N. I’ll talk to you soon!”
“Goodbye, Mr. Choi,” you chuckled, hanging up the call.
Closing your laptop, you went back downstairs to the kitchen to see your mom sat at the table, reading a book. Jisung was sitting in his chair across from her, and turned around expectantly at the sound of your feet. You poked your head into the kitchen to check on Hyesoo, who looked like she was still cooking.
“Hi, Mom,” you announced your presence to your mother, coming around the table to her seat.
She looked up at you with a smile, her eyes clearly focusing on you. You wrapped your arms around her shoulders from behind, resting your cheek on the top of her head. She held onto your arms with one of her hands, squeezing gently.
“What are you reading?” You asked, trying to glean any information from the pages that were opened in front of you.
“Oh, this was Hyukjun’s favorite book,” she explained, closing it on her finger to let you see the cover. “I was thinking about him today…”
“I think I read that in a Lit class I took in undergrad,” you commented. “I never knew it was his favorite.”
“Funny enough, it was your father’s favorite too.”
“Here I spent my whole life thinking ‘Goodnight, Moon’ was Dad’s favorite book,” you snickered, referencing the answer he had given you when you were a kid, one of the many children’s books you had at the time.
“Well, he didn’t really want to tell you about this sort of book when you were that little, I think.”
“Can you let me know when you’re done with that book?” You requested. “I think I’d like to reread it.”
“Of course.”
Hyesoo came into the dining area then with three plates, and you let your mom go to take your seat. Your mother set her book aside as dinner was set in front of her.
“Did you look at the mail today, Y/N?” Your mom asked.
“I skimmed it, threw out the junk,” you shrugged, taking a bite of your food. “Why? Did you?”
Your mom must’ve had a very good day today. She usually didn’t bother with things like the mail at all.
“Did you see that Seohyuk’s getting married?”
“Yeah, again,” you snorted. This was marriage number three, if you were up to date on your stepbrother lore. “I’m surprised we even got an invite.”
“Y/N.” Your mother said your name sternly.
“Sorry,” you mumbled. Clearing your throat, you kept your tone more neutral as you said, “Yeah, I saw. Good for them.”
“What do you think?”
“About what? I just said good for them?”
“Going.”
You looked at her incredulously. “Like, to the wedding?”
“He’s family, Y/N.”
“Hyukjun was family,” you didn’t mean to snap at your mom like you did, your voice filling with vitriol. “They’re just three assholes that Hyukjun had the misfortune of being related to. We don’t owe them shit.”
“Y/N!” Your mother gaped at you.
Hyesoo and Jisung had both been silently watching the two of you go back and forth, and you suddenly became aware of the presence of two others in the room again. You took a deep breath in, looking over at the aide.
“Sorry,” you muttered, pushing your chair back from the table. “Good food. I’m not hungry anymore.”
“Y/N, sweetie, can we—”
You ignored your mom’s pleas to talk, scraping off your plate into the garbage and putting your dishes in the dishwasher before storming upstairs. Flopping onto your back on your bed, you stared up at your ceiling fan.
When you heard a knock on your door some time later, you rolled your eyes, but called out to Jisung anyway, “Come in!”
Your door handle turned and opened, revealing not Jisung, and not even your mother, but Hyesoo. She paused at the doorway, obviously aware that you hadn’t been expecting her.
“May I come in?” She requested.
You sat up straight on your bed, nodding. “Sure.”
Hyesoo came and sat beside you, leaving a polite distance between the two of you. “I don’t want to overstep, Y/N… But I imagine there’s some stuff that has happened between you and your stepbrothers that your mom doesn’t know about?”
“Yeah, lots,” you scoffed. “They hate us. They’ve always been rude to me, but ever since Hyukjun left us the house… it’s just gotten worse.”
“When’s the last time you saw or talked to one of them?”
You breathed out. “Uh… probably when Seohyuk came to inspect the property a few months ago now. Mom didn’t even know it happened, Nayoung took her for a walk.”
“Hyukjun was family to you, right? That’s what you just said.”
“Doesn’t meant his shithead sons have to be my family,” you retorted. “They said to me, at his wake, that my mom and I weren’t his family. Like, how awful do you have to be?”
“Hyukjun saw you as his family. His wife’s daughter,” she said slowly. “Do you think, your mom might see Hyukjun’s sons the same way? I’m not saying you have to. But consider your mom’s feelings for a moment.”
You took a deep inhale, trying to separate your thoughts from your own swirling emotions in that moment. “I… I didn’t think of that.”
It was then that you saw she had something in her hands, and she held out two small pictures to you. One was the wedding invite, a picture of Seohyuk and his fiancée smiling on the front. The other was of a young man around Seohyuk’s age, the image grainy, as it was clearly older and taken on film. It was undeniable who this was, though—Hyukjun.
“Your mom was showing me some photo albums earlier, when she saw the wedding invite,” Hyesoo explained. “She didn’t say it, but don’t you think he looks so much like his dad?”
You swallowed the anger in your throat, eyes tracing over the two photos, the similar smiles, the way their crow’s feet crinkled, their noses, cheekbones, and jawlines. It was hard not to see Hyukjun in his eldest son now.
“Yeah, he does,” you agreed.
“Nobody is saying you have to go to the wedding and be best friends with your stepbrothers,” she said. “Or at least, I'm not saying that. But it might be a good idea to think about why your mom would want to go. Those ‘assholes’ are living, breathing pieces of Hyukjun that are still walking around. They’re his sons, and maybe she wants to feel connected to him by connecting with them.”
“He was such a good guy,” you reached for the picture of Hyukjun, holding it between your fingers. “How did he raise three absolute fucking jerks?”
“A mystery we’ll never be able to solve.” Hyesoo clicked her tongue. “I’m about to help your mom get ready for bed, do you want to talk to her before?”
You sighed and nodded. “Yeah, let me do that.”
She handed you the wedding invite as well, standing up from your bed. “She’s in her room. Let me know when you’re done.”
Steeling your nerves, you knocked lightly on your mom’s bedroom door. “Mom? It’s Y/N.”
“Come in, sweetie.”
You opened the door quietly, immediately spotting her sitting on the corner of her bed, as if she had been waiting for you. Sitting down next to her, you took her hand, squeezing it.
“I’m sorry, Mom,” you started. “I should’ve listened to you instead of being rude and talking to you like that. I was only thinking about my feelings about Seohyuk and them, and not yours. Can you tell me more about why you want to go to the wedding?”
“I-I know you and your stepbrothers haven’t gotten along, sweetie,” she prefaced her reasoning. “But… When I think about the fact that Hyukjun won’t get to see this… Even if he did see the first two, you know.”
The both of you snickered a little at that, bumping your shoulders together affectionately. You held the two pictures out to her just like Hyesoo had done to you.
“I get what you’re saying, Mom,” you leaned your head against hers, looking at the nearly identical visages of Seohyuk and Hyukjun. “I miss him too. If this will make you feel closer to him, or that you’re honoring him or something like that, then we should go. I’ll support you.”
“Thank you, Y/N.” She ran a thumb over the picture of Hyukjun.
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“What do you want to do for your birthday?” You asked Jisung, searching the table for your next puzzle piece. Your mom had gone to sleep and the two of you were putting together a jigsaw puzzle in your relaxing time before your own bedtime.
Jisung dropped his own puzzle piece that he had been trying to place, staring at you from across the coffee table. “My what?!”
“Your birthday. It’s next week.” You finally fished an edge piece out. “When I looked up the genealogy stuff, it had your birthday on there.”
“I mean, I figured that’s how you knew, but I didn’t think you’d actually—I don’t know, I’m surprised.”
“What? It’s probably been a while since you’ve celebrated it, right?” You put your puzzle piece down. “We don’t have to do anything if you don’t want to, I just figured it might be nice.”
“No, I-I’d like that,” he smiled softly. “Just don’t get me a cake with an accurate number of candles in it, please.”
“I think that’d get more candle wax on it than frosting.” You wrinkled your nose, making him roll his eyes. “Are you telling me I have to plan it? I asked you what you want to do.”
“Just you remembering is enough to make my birthday feel special this year, Y/N.” Jisung reached across the table to grab your hand. “I don’t really care what else happens. But I’ll think of something, promise.”
One week later, and Jisung’s birthday lined up with a night that Hyesoo was staying over, so you couldn’t use the living room, as she slept on the couch whenever she stayed. So the two of you retreated to your bedroom after dinner. Closing the door behind you, you turned to Jisung with your arms crossed, narrowing your eyes at him.
“You still haven’t told me what you want to do for your birthday,” you reminded him, tapping your foot. “And your birthday’s almost over.”
“I know what I want,” he reassured you. “But you need to change into your pajamas first, so—”
And with that, he stepped back and through the wall, out of your room. You begrudgingly changed from your casual daywear into your pajamas, then called for him to come back in. Your ghost popped back in immediately, heading towards his side of the bed. You watched him suspiciously as he sat down and grabbed the book on the nightstand. Instead of turning on his lamp as he would usually do, though, he reached over to the lamp on your side of the bed and clicked it on, then offered the book out towards you.
“I want you to read to me tonight,” he requested.
“That’s it?” You frowned.
“That’s it,” he confirmed. “You can sing me ‘Happy Birthday’ too, if it’ll make you feel better.”
You took the book from him and sat down against the headboard, pulling your covers over your lap. Jisung laid down on top of the blankets, looking up at you, waiting. You sighed and shook your head, fondly brushing some of his hair out of his face.
“Happy Birthday, Jisung,” you said, opening the book to where he had left off when he’d been reading to you.
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“I can’t believe you’re actually going,” Jisung grumbled, handing you a lid to the plastic container.
“Me neither,” you sighed your agreement, snapping the container shut.
Today was finally the day of Seohyuk’s wedding. You, your mom, and Nayoung had just finished up lunch, and the aide would be helping her get ready while you got yourself dressed. Your ghost had made his distaste of the situation plenty clear.
“You couldn’t just send money and a card?”
“My mom wanted to go, and she doesn’t have another daughter to go with her,” you put the leftovers into the fridge. “I would’ve looked like a bitch sending her with an aide while I stayed home. And felt like a bitch.”
“Can’t believe that guy has even found three people who wanted to marry him.”
You laughed heartily at that. “Me neither. It’s got to be the money. Investment brokers make good money, right?”
“To fuck if I know,” your ghost snorted.
“Anyway, stay here while I get ready.”
Jisung saluted you, making you chuckle a little as you left the kitchen. The dress code was cocktail, unfortunately for you, meaning that you had to dress in the nicest outfit you’d worn since Hyukjun’s funeral. Most of your day-to-day wear was lounge clothes lately. After putting on your outfit, and doing your hair and makeup as well, you did a final once-over in the mirror, honestly a bit surprised at yourself.
Walking back downstairs, you could tell that Nayoung was still helping your mom in her room, so you looked around instead for Jisung. You saw his dark head of hair sitting on the couch in the living room, and started that way. He turned upon hearing your footsteps, jaw actually dropping when he spotted you.
“You’re going to catch flies like that,” you teased, pushing his chin back up as you stopped in front of him.
He looked up at you with wide eyes instead. “Woah…”
“Good woah?”
Jisung nodded, standing up and offering you a hand. You gently placed yours atop it, and he lifted it to twirl you around, making a giggle bubble out of you.
“Great woah,” he confirmed. “So not fair you look like this for that asshole’s wedding.”
“It’s not for him,” you scoffed. “It’s for me.”
“Still… I think the bride is going to get jealous.”
“Oh my God.” You rolled your eyes, putting your hand over his mouth insistently, despite you being the only person in the house that could hear him. “You’re awful, you know that?”
He was obviously grinning behind your hand, eyes crinkling up with a mischievous twinkle. You sighed and dropped your hand from his mouth.
“So not fair to be that cute when I’m trying to be mad at you,” you huffed, pinching one of his cheeks.
“Ow,” he pouted, covering the reddened skin once you’d let go.
You heard your mom’s bedroom door open, and her and Nayoung came out a moment later. You walked over to give her a hug.
“Mom, that dress is so pretty,” you complimented her.
“Oh, Y/N,” she cupped your cheek. “You look so beautiful, sweetie.”
“You’re really beautiful, Y/N,” Nayoung added quietly.
“Oh, thank you,” you brushed down your outfit. “Thank you for your help, Nayoung. We should be good to go, I think.”
“Yes, yes, we need to get going!” Your mom clapped her hands together. “Don’t want to be late!”
After putting your mom to bed following the reception, you crept out of her room with your heels in hand. Jisung was at the bottom of the stairs, clearly waiting for you. He held his hands out to take your shoes from you, following you upstairs.
“So how was the wedding?” He asked, stopping outside your door to let you get changed inside in peace.
“Oh, it wasn’t bad, actually,” you answered him as you got undressed. “I think everyone was on their best behavior because it was a wedding, you know?”
“That’s good.”
“Seohyuk’s wife is actually really nice,” you informed him, chuckling in disbelief. “I hope he treats her right. And if not, I hope she’s got a good pre-nup.”
“Did your mom have a good time?”
“Oh yeah, she tore up the dance floor.”
“Really?”
“Yup.” Finally in your pajamas, you called out, “You can come in.”
Jisung materialized through the door, and went to put your shoes away for you that he was still holding. “I’m glad you two had a good time.”
“Me too.” You plopped into bed, feeling the exhaustion of the night hitting you all at once. “I’m almost glad that I went.”
“Almost?”
“I’m still thinking about how I could’ve spent all night in my pajamas instead of getting hit on by Seohyuk’s best man.”
“Seriously?”
“Mhm…” You yawned and pulled your blankets up over you as Jisung sat down against the headboard and robotically grabbed the book on the nightstand.
“Was ‘fuck off’ not clear enough for him?”
“Didn’t tell him to fuck off,” you shrugged.
“What?!”
You winced and rubbed your ear. “Loud…”
“Sorry, sorry,” he quieted his voice down again.
“I was bored, and he wasn’t a jerk about it or anything,” you explained simply, closing your eyes and pushing your cheek against your pillow. “Still would’ve rather been here in my pajamas with you, though.”
“Oh. Okay…” Jisung took a deep breath, opening the book up to pick up where he’d left off in the story.
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You were putting leftovers from dinner away some nights later as Hyesoo dispensed your mom’s medications for the upcoming week. You knew your worry was written all over your face. Your mom had been having so many good days—so many lucid days—lately, but today was bad. She asked you why you weren’t at school multiple times, refused to eat, and had another fit over the house being haunted. You were putting her plate of food away right now, entirely untouched.
“It was stupid,” you sighed. “For me to think she was getting better. I know her diagnosis—she’s only going to get worse.”
“There will be ups and downs, Y/N,” the aide reminded you gently. “The important thing is to not blame yourself for any of it.”
You sighed. “You’re right. Thanks, Hyesoo.”
“You don’t have work to do after this, do you?”
“A little bit. You’re staying the night, right?”
“Yes, I am.”
“Good, good.”
“You know, I’ve been doing this for a while, dear,” she said kindly, shaking out a few pills. “And while I don’t know everything, I do know you can’t run yourself into the ground trying to take care of them. Or else there will be nothing left of you, and then how will you take care of her?”
“I know, it was hard to focus on work today, that’s all.”
“I mean—I’ve been with you all for some time now, and when was the last time you hung out with your own friends? Or went on a date? You’re a beautiful young lady, you’re doing the world a disservice staying cooped up in here all the time.”
You laughed and shook your head. “Really—”
“I’m being serious! Just think about it, dear. I promise, taking some time to keep living your life now won’t be the end of the world. This way, you’ll have a support system when you need it.”
You nodded in understanding, putting the leftovers away with robotic movements as your brain continued turning over her words.
Just about a week after that conversation with Hyesoo and you were fixing your hair in the mirror when a gentle knock came at your bedroom door. You called out to the person as you continued messing with your hair. “Come in!”
Jisung phased through your door. “Dinner’s ready, are you—”
He stopped his words as he seemed to take in what you were wearing, tilting his head with a curious frown. “You got changed?”
“I’m going out for dinner,” you told him, leaning over to focus on putting your earrings in.
“Out? Like, a work thing?”
“No, I’ve got a date.”
“What? With who?” He sputtered, then collected himself a little. “I mean—This is the first I’ve heard of it. How did you meet them?”
“His name’s Dongmin. I met him at the wedding last week.”
“Wait, don’t tell me he’s the best man you were talking about?”
“He gave me his number.” You shrugged. “So?”
“I thought you didn’t even like him?”
“What does it matter to you?” You crossed your arms.
“What do you—? Of course I care if you’re going on a date with some creepy guy who you don’t like.” Jisung ran a hand through his hair.
“I reached out to him, Jisung.” You didn’t know why you were getting so defensive, why you felt so on edge at the moment.
He crossed his arms. “Why did you hide it from me?”
“I didn’t hide it from you,” you scoffed. “I don’t have to tell you everything.”
“Yeah, but this is—”
“What? This is what?”
He held his hands up in surrender, looking away from you. “Never mind. Hope you have fun.”
“Yeah, that wasn’t passive aggressive,” you snorted, grabbing your phone. “You’re just pissed because I’m the only person you can talk to all day but I get to actually leave this stupid house and hang out with people other than you.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” Jisung glared back at you, raising his voice to match yours. It was quite possibly the most venomous you’d heard the normally soft-spoken ghost be towards you. “You leave the house all the time, you always talk to your mom or her aides. I don’t give a shit.”
You checked the time on your phone, setting your jaw. “I need to go. I don’t have time for you to keep avoiding what you’re actually trying to say.”
“Oh, right, I’m the only one avoiding,” he retorted sarcastically.
“Lalala! Not listening! Too busy avoiding!” You said in a purposefully childish, loud, and sing-songy voice, plugging one ear as you threw your door open and slammed it shut behind you.
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The lights in the house were dark when you got back. Good, you didn’t want to face Hyesoo like this. It was already going to be bad enough risking running into Jisung. Hopefully he was still pissed at you and would stay scarce. Taking a deep breath to dampen your sobs for a few moments, you unlocked the front door and opened it as quietly as you could. No paranormal force on the other side opened it for you this time. Hyesoo’s light snores could be heard from the living room, but other than the sleeping aide, the house was eerily silent. You locked up behind you and started up the stairs, but couldn’t even bring yourself to make it all the way to your room. You all but collapsed at the top step, letting your tears stream freely again as you cried quietly into your hands, hunched over your knees.
That was a fucking disaster.
“Y/N?”
You opened your eyes back up at the soft, familiar voice. Jisung was at the bottom of the stairs, hands in the pockets of his cardigan.
“Oh, Jisung, hey.” You didn’t bother wiping your tears this time as you greeted him. He hesitantly shifted his weight from one foot to another. You patted the spot next to you for him. “Déjà vu, huh?”
He sat down next to you on the top step, deep frown on his features. “What happened?”
“Ugh, guy was an asshole,” you sniffed. “Like, I thought he was really nice and everything, but as soon as he realized I wasn’t going home with him, he turned into a jerk.”
“He didn’t…”
“No, he just said a bunch of rude stuff. Called me a bitch, a whore who was just using him for his money or whatever.”
“Y/N—”
“All that, I didn’t really care about,” you admitted, curling your hands into fists and digging your nails into your palms as his words came back to you. “It was what he said about my mom that really pissed me off. Essentially said I should just put her up in a home and get on with my life. I about threw a punch in the middle of the restaurant.”
Jisung let out a light chuckle at that, but the humor in his features didn’t last long. He scooted closer to you, tentatively wrapping an arm around your shoulders. “I’m sorry it didn’t go well for you.”
You shrugged, leaning against him and resting your head on his shoulder. “I don’t know what I expected, really. He was Seohyuk’s friend, of course he was going to be an asshole.”
Jisung wasn’t warm, but you found his cool embrace comforting enough, the steady pressure of his arm encircling you, his sturdy body supporting you as he let you lean against him.
“I’m sorry, for getting upset at you earlier,” he apologized quietly. “You didn’t have to tell me where you were going, and I shouldn’t have reacted like that.”
“I wasn’t being very fair either,” you replied. “I’m sorry too.”
“But… Why did you go out with that guy? I mean, if he had been nice, would you have… Would he…” Jisung stopped, apparently frustrated at not knowing how to phrase what he wanted to ask. “Why not me? I know that sounds so pathetic, but that’s all I wanted to ask you before.”
You squeezed your eyes shut tighter, biting your bottom lip against the emotions rushing up in your chest at his words. “Jisung…”
“I’m not… imagining all this, right? I mean, there’s something here, Y/N. A-A connection.”
“What kind of relationship can you even have with a ghost?” You asked sadly.
“Maybe the kind you need now.” He grabbed one of your hands, holding it tightly in your laps between you.
“I’m going to get older, Jisung,” you reminded him calmly, despite each word piercing your chest like a knife. “Not to mention—I won’t be here forever. Like, in this house. I don’t own it. I’ll have to leave once she… I’ll have to go. I can’t stay here.”
“Does everything worthwhile in life have to last forever?” He murmured, his voice practically begging now. “Tell me you didn’t think about me while you were on that date…”
Your breath hitched in your throat. “I can’t…”
“You did? Think about me?”
“The whole time,” you admitted. “Even when it was going okay, I was thinking about you.”
“Y/N…”
You looked up from your entwined hands, realizing that you were gripping onto him maybe even harder than he was you. Meeting his dark gaze, you blinked away a few more stray tears.
You finally let out a shaky breath and nodded. “Until it’s over, you and me.”
A smile overtook his features as he rested his forehead against yours. Readjusting your hand to cover the back of his, you moved his index finger to his chest, tracing an X over his heart. Your ghost watched your movements fondly, echoing, “Until it’s over, you and me.”
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“Do you have anything left here that’s yours? Hair in a locket under a floorboard or something?” You questioned, looking around your room.
“What? No,” Jisung scoffed.
“Figured I’d ask.”
The two of you were brainstorming. Jisung really wanted to be able to go somewhere out of the house with you, but the best ideas you had of course came from popular ghost media.
“Your stepdad kept a lot of the original house fixtures when he bought it. Maybe one of those,” your ghost suggested.
“I’m not carrying a faucet around in my purse,” you replied frankly. “Not to mention, I’m not allowed to damage the house while I live here. My stepbrothers could sue me for anything that’s not exactly how it was when Hyukjun left it.”
“What about…” Jisung walked through the closed door, and you could hear the squeak of the stairs as he went down them. A few moments later, he went back up them, then came through the door again. He held out something in his closed fist towards you.
You stretched out your hand palm-up, and he opened up his fingers to drop a small piece of metal into it. It had some weight to it, and you turned it over in your hand to get a better look at it. It looked like a knob to a cabinet or drawer, in the shape of an eight-pointed starburst. It wasn’t familiar to you at all, it didn’t look like he had taken it off any place in the house that you could tell.
You looked up at him with a furrowed brow. “Where…?”
“It’s one of the original knobs that was on the cabinets in the kitchen,” he explained. “Your stepdad’s first wife wanted them all replaced when she moved in. He put them in a box in the laundry room closet and they haven’t been touched since. I doubt your stepbrothers even know about them. She probably thought he got rid of them.”
“These were on the cabinets when you lived here?”
“Yep.”
You pocketed the cabinet knob. “Can’t hurt to try.”
Once you’d given your mom and Nayoung your goodbyes, you headed for the front door. Jisung was right behind you, looking positively giddy as he watched you put your shoes on.
Patting your pocket again to reassure yourself that the cabinet knob was in there, you stepped down from the porch and onto the walkway. After nodding politely to a jogger going by, you looked around hesitantly at the empty space on either side of you.
“Jisung?” You said quietly.
“I’m here.” He appeared next to you, beaming down at you. “I’m here.”
The two of you had never gone past the porch swing, not even down to the flowerbeds you had continued to tend to. You grabbed his arm to pull him down with you as you squatted in front of the snapdragons that had just come back into bloom. Pride and bittersweet nostalgia welled up in your chest as you looked at the flowers that used to be Hyukjun’s hobby.
“Do you know the secret with these?” You asked Jisung.
“No?” He replied, tilting his head.
You reached out to gently squeeze the sides of a pink flower, making the dragon’s “mouth” open and close. “You can make their mouths open and shut.”
Jisung watched you fondly, then tried it on another bloom. He giggled. “That’s kind of fun, actually.”
Standing back up, you continued to the end of the house’s short walkway, stopping on the sidewalk.
“This is the furthest I’ve been in… a while,” he said, eyes shining.
“We’re still in the lay lines of the property…” You kept your hopes guarded. “I don’t want to call it a success yet.”
Walking down the sidewalk, you kept your eye on Jisung the further you got from the house, waiting for him to hit some invisible barrier and disappear entirely, or at least flicker or something else to indicate that he was losing his connection to the house. But he looked… normal. Fine.
When you were a full three blocks away from the house, Jisung grabbed your hand, lacing his fingers with yours.
“Would you stop looking at me like I’m going to die again?” He joked.
“Sorry, sorry,” you sighed. “I just… can’t believe it. How do you feel?”
“Fine. Great!” He grinned.
You'd never seen Jisung in direct sunlight before, only ever the lights of the house, sunbeams that filtered in through curtains and windows, or moonlight at night. You were surprised at how… normal he looked. His skin had a lifelike rosy tint to it in places, his hair shone and reflected a dark brown at some angles, and he didn’t have any sort of ghostly pallor to him. The only thing that didn’t change were his eyes, still as dark and enrapturing as ever, his pupils melting into his irises.
“So where are we going?” He asked, swinging your linked hands.
“You’ll see.” You squeezed his hand before letting it go, hearing the sounds of other people around the corner that you were about to turn.
The destination you had in mind wasn’t very far, which was good, because your shoulder was getting tired carrying your tote bag. Veering off the sidewalk at a seemingly random place, you walked through a gap between two bushes. Jisung followed you diligently, keeping whatever questions he had to himself. The path underfoot was overgrown with grass and clover, only a path to a keen observer, or those who already knew it was there.
Finally, you ducked around a large tree and emerged at a clearing in front of a small pond. Jisung looked around in wonder as you proudly put your hands on your hips.
“Hyukjun and I came out here a couple times, when he and my mom first got together,” you explained. “Bonding stuff. I’m happy I remembered where it was.”
“I think…” Jisung slowly turned around in a circle, still taking it all in. “I think my friends and I used to swim here in the summer. And when the pond would freeze in the winter, we’d skate…”
He walked over to the largest tree nearby, fingers tracing over the bark that had endless initials carved in it, until he squatted down by the base. “Yeah. I didn’t recognize the streets when we were walking over here, but…”
You joined him by the tree, watching as he pointed out a cluster of initials, seven in total, ending on PJS. “There you all are,” you said quietly. “I didn’t even know this was here.”
“They’re probably all old men now,” Jisung chuckled, a laugh that you could tell was forced.
You reached for his hand, holding it with both of yours. “It’s okay to be sad that you didn’t get to grow old with your best friends, Jisung. I know you’re the one that passed away, but have you mourned them yet? All your friends and family that you didn’t get to see grow old?”
“Damn it.” He shook his head. “I didn’t want to make you all sad on our first real date.”
“I’m dating a ghost,” you pointed out, running your thumb over the back of his hand. “I think a little doom and gloom comes with the territory.”
“To answer your question, I haven’t thought about it like that,” he sighed. “I always felt bad that I left them, that they had to mourn me. But I never… grieved the fact that I lost them too.”
“I don’t want to make you sad on our date, either,” you panicked a little at the shadow that had fallen over his features, moving to wrap an arm around his shoulders and hug him. “I’m sorry!”
Jisung laughed a real laugh this time, hugging you back. “It’s okay, Y/N. It’s better than feeling guilty for something I had no control over.”
“Well, that’s true.”
“I honestly hadn’t even thought about coming here with them in so long… Really, it’s nice to remember them all again.”
You let go of him to reach into your tote, pulling out the large picnic blanket you’d brought with you. “How about instead of the both of us making each other sad, you tell me a bunch of fun stories about your friends while I enjoy the picnic food I packed?”
He pecked your forehead, taking the blanket from your hand. “Deal.”
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The pond had become one of yours and Jisung’s favorite spots to go when you could find time between work and your mom. The two of you could get out of the house together without risking you getting some very strange looks in public. Sometimes you brought a picnic, sometimes books or a crossword puzzle or deck of cards or just laid on your blanket and tried to find shapes in the clouds. Every so often, you’d get someone coming by walking their dog, or a gaggle of kids cutting through from one of their backyards to another, but nobody ever paid you much more attention past a ‘hello’ or ‘lovely afternoon, isn’t it?’
After submitting a big project at work, you finally had some free time again. As long as your mom was having a good day today. She’d been more sensitive to you leaving the house lately on her bad days, and while the aides promised that she always calmed down eventually, you hated causing her so much stress if it was avoidable—errands were one thing, but a date with your ghost boyfriend that already haunted your residence could take a raincheck.
You looked in the living room first, then the dining area and kitchen, and frowned thoughtfully when you couldn’t find your mother and Nayoung. Turning around, you were greeted by Jisung, who pointed to the backyard knowingly.
“They’re in the back drinking lemonade,” he informed you. “She’s having a good day.”
“Oh, good. Thanks, Jisung,” you let out a breath of relief, giving him a kiss on the cheek as you passed by on your way back into the living room.
Opening up the door that led onto the back porch, you immediately spotted your mom and Nayoung sitting beside each other on two rocking chairs, a pitcher of lemonade between them as they overlooked the small backyard. Their conversation stopped when they heard the door open, both of them turning to look at you over their sunglasses.
You held your hands up defensively. “Woah, I feel like I just interrupted something…”
“Yes, you can go, sweetie,” your mom said knowingly.
“What?”
“You finished your work and are checking on me to see if you can go out.” She took a sip of her lemonade, pushing her sunglasses back up and settling back into her chair again. “I’m telling you I’m fine, and you can go.”
“Nayoung?” You turned to the aide. “Everything okay—?”
“We’re fine, Y/N!” Nayoung waved you off with a smile. “Really!”
“Alright, alright.” You surrendered, backing up towards the door again. “I’ll be back before Hyesoo gets here.”
“What day is it, Nayoung?” Your mom asked.
“Wednesday.”
“You know, my memory isn’t the best, remind me, when does Hyesoo stay the night?”
“Mondays and Wednesdays.”
“Hm.” Your mom tsked. “Interesting…”
Nayoung didn’t add anything further, but giggled as she took another sip of her lemonade.
“You two are nuisances,” you scoffed and shook your head, finally heading back inside.
You beelined for your bedroom, finding your ghost already sitting on your bed clearly waiting for you.
“Oh yeah, she’s having a great day,” you snorted in lieu of a greeting, grabbing your usual tote bag. “That new medication her doctor put her on is doing wonders. I might have to have him cut her off.”
“I think she’s a lot of fun,” Jisung snickered. “Earlier, when you were on that work call, she was telling Nayoung about your third-grade science fair—”
“Ahh!” You cut him off by planting two hands over his mouth, eyes going wide with mortification. “Of all the things she remembers, that’s what sticks around?! Are you kidding?”
His shoulders were shaking as he let out muffled laughter behind your hands, and he eventually collapsed backwards onto your bed. Your hands dropped from his face as you stayed upright, allowing his laughs to echo freely in your room.
“If you’re going to keep making fun of me, we’re not going out.” You crossed your arms. “I’ll bury your cabinet knobs in the backyard, and your soul will really be stuck here forever.”
“You’ve got to stop being so cute when you pout, and I’ll stop teasing you.” He was still chuckling as he sat up and reached for you with two hands. With an eyeroll, you let him pull you into his lap and wrap his arms around your waist.
“This isn’t fair, I can’t find out embarrassing stuff about you unless you tell me,” you huffed, well aware you that you were still pouting.
“I always answer your questions. You just don’t ask me that stuff.”
“Well now I will.”
“Anything else you need to pout about?”
You let out a deep breath, your face relaxing a little bit. “No. Done for now I think.”
He cupped your cheek, leaning in to press his mouth to yours. Like everything else, Jisung’s lips were cool as they meshed with yours. Not uncomfortably so, he wasn’t quite an icicle, just unlike any human you’d kissed before. You put your hand over his on your cheek, remembering when even that used to be a far-away impossibility.
You left him with one more kiss on the tip of his nose before asking, “Are you ready to go? Mom and Nayoung gave me the okay.”
He started playing with your fingers, eyes focused downwards as he spoke. “I actually wanted to ask if we could maybe go somewhere else today?”
“Sure. Where were you thinking?”
“I don’t want to be a bummer or anything but…”
“What is it?”
His throat bobbed up and down as he swallowed. “You wrote down the cemetery, right? When you went to library and looked up the genealogies and stuff about me. You said you wrote down where my parents buried me?”
“Yeah, I still have it,” you confirmed, cradling the back of his head as you patiently waited for him to finish asking what you knew he wanted to ask you.
It took him a few inhales and exhales to ask, “Can we go?”
“Of course.”
This was officially the furthest you and Jisung had gone from the house together. He’d gone with you on errands a couple times before—the post office, library, things within walking distance—but you had to get on a train for this. You were a little nervous that he might not be able to go this far, even with the cabinet knob safely tied onto a leather cord and tucked under your shirt. So far, the only limit you’d discovered to his leaving the house was time—six hours or so seemed to be the magic number. You’d found that out on a particularly lazy day, when you were looking up at clouds together and suddenly his lap disappeared from beneath your head. He’d apparently popped back up in the foyer with the first headache he’d experienced in decades. Since then, you’d been more careful to keep an eye on the time when you brought him with you.
But he sat comfortably through the whole ten-minute train ride at your side as if he were any other passenger. The car that you were in wasn’t full, meaning that you had a row to yourself, leaving an empty seat next to you for Jisung. After arriving at your stop, you had another five-minute walk until you finally arrived at the cemetery.
“This is where my parents are from,” Jisung stated as you passed under the metal archway at the entrance. “That’s probably why they didn’t choose somewhere back in town.”
A winding path went through the center of the land, smaller pathways breaking off into other areas. It was a big cemetery, gently rolling hills dotted with headstones, grave markers, elegantly carved statues, all sorts of tributes to loved ones. The two of you took a meandering pace, eyes scanning all the names for just one. You looked around the property warily, now extra aware of being a public nuisance somewhere so sacred. You especially didn’t want to risk disturbing any mourners who might be here. But you couldn’t spot anybody except yourself and Jisung, maybe because it was the middle of the day in the middle of the work week.
“There,” Jisung announced, his gaze locked on something in the distance, while you had been looking at markers much closer. He grabbed your hand and pulled you with him as he rushed across the cemetery.
You stopped in front of a simply shaped granite headstone with a carved border. The name at the top read ‘PARK JISUNG’ and under it, a birthdate and death date that were familiar to you. It was the epitaph that was new to you, however.
‘THERE WILL ALWAYS BE LOVE
CROSS OUR HEARTS’
Jisung reached a finger out, tracing over each letter in ��LOVE.’ He said, “I always wanted to know what they wrote. What they said about me. How they wanted to remember me forever.”
“It’s lovely. They love you a lot,” you replied quietly, resting a hand on his back.
He looked over at you hopefully. “You’re talking in present tense. Are they…?”
“The records I looked at didn’t list them as deceased when I was looking for information about you, but I don’t know how often it’s updated,” you informed him. “I didn’t look any further into them, I was only trying to find out what happened to you.”
“Do you think two more headstones could fit there?” He gestured to the empty space beside his own.
You took the seemingly random question in stride, genuinely contemplating it. “Probably, yeah. Or one big one would fit better, like the couples that get buried together.”
Jisung had a satisfied smile on his face as he nodded. “Yeah, one big one. That’s it.”
It dawned on you then what he was thinking—his parents had most likely reserved the plot next to his for themselves once they passed, and since it was still empty, they were still alive.
“Thank you.” He took your hand, lacing your fingers together. “For coming out here with me. This must be the weirdest date you’ve been on.”
“Visiting my boyfriend’s own grave with him?” You tilted your head back and forth contemplatively, a teasing lilt in your tone. “Mm, yeah, definitely up there. But I’m glad that you wanted to do this with me, Jisung. I can’t imagine what this feels like for you.”
“I’m ready to go,” he declared, looking up at the blue sky above you. “It’s such a nice day, isn’t it?”
“It is,” you agreed, fondly admiring his little one-eyed squint against the sunlight.
Back home that night, you shook one of your sleeping meds from the bottle, setting it down on your nightstand as you went about getting ready for bed. Your ghost was already sat against the headboard, his legs covered by your blankets, hands folded over the book in his lap as he waited for you. Finally ready, you knocked back the tablet with a gulp of water and climbed under your covers. Jisung rested one hand on your head, thumb stroking over your forehead, but after an abnormally long period of silence, you opened one eye to peer up at him.
He was just gazing down at you tenderly, and you fought the instinct to cover your face, instead reaching over to tap the cover of his closed book.
“Aren’t you supposed to be doing something?” You complained in jest.
“Sorry, I was just thinking,” he responded, still not moving to open the book.
“What about?”
“My epitaph. ‘There will always be love.’”
“It’s nice.” You bit back a yawn.
“Yeah. I was thinking about how they probably meant it like their love for me will persist, and proof that I was here and was loved and loved others when I was alive will persist.”
“I like that, Jisung. I think that’s what they meant.”
“And… there was no way they could’ve known this when they picked it, but I was thinking…” Your ghost paused, dark eyes enrapturing you in that moment that you didn’t even think about breathing. “About how even after I died, you somehow found me.”
You grabbed the book from his lap, reaching behind you to blindly put it on your nightstand. Jisung immediately understood, turning his lamp off and leaving the room in darkness as he slipped the rest of the way under the covers. You buried your face in his neck, tangling your fingers in the hair at the back of his head as you simultaneously pressed yourself into him and pulled him as close as possible. He wrapped his arms around you tightly, digging his fingers into you hard enough to make you feel real, which you were glad for.
“I’m going to bring you with me,” you choked out past the tears rising in your eyes. “When it’s time for me to leave. I’ll bring all the cabinet knobs, a chunk of the foundation, whatever will make it work. Fuck my stepbrothers—I’ll pay whatever damages. If you want—”
“Of course I do.” He didn’t even let you finish that thought, and you could hear the tremble in his voice. “But we’ve never been able to get around the time…”
“I’ll figure it out for us, Jisung.” You pulled back just enough to show him as you drew an X over the left side of your chest. “Cross my heart.”
He took your hand from your heart, kissing the back of your fingers tenderly. “We knew it was going to be like this. We promised.”
“We said ‘until it’s over,’” you argued. “I don’t want it to be over yet.”
“It’s not,” he agreed. “But I don’t think it’ll be our choice when it is. Not everything worthwhile has to last forever.”
“Jisung—”
“We’ll try everything,” he assured you, squeezing your hand. “I’m not giving up on you, Y/N. You and me, until you hand the keys over and close the front door behind you.”
“You’ll be coming with me when I do that, Park Jisung,” you declared, your voice cracking over his name.
He wrapped both arms around you again, tucking you under his chin. “Of course.”
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⤷ sequel | masterlist
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astroamorsworld · 6 months ago
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Astrology Observations #26
If you guys would like to show your support, you can buy me a coffee here :)
I’m starting to compile a list of reviews for readings on my masterlist so check it out if you’d like😊
If you guys would like a reading, feel free to DM me or fill out my Google form here
Take what resonates, leave what doesn’t. Enjoy!
Please do not copy my work.
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🍿Someone I know has a Scorpio ruled 7th house and through their past relationships have been victims of witchcraft because of it. Whether it was their partners paying people to do spells on them or someone their partners were previously involved with or someone their partners were close with, its been a somewhat common occurrence for this person unfortunately☹️
(And i don’t think having a neptune there helped either…😕)
🍿Those of you who have your Moon in the 8th house, do you like horror films? Like it’s something i’ve noticed with a few people i know and i personally dislike a lot of them👎
🍿As a girl with a Gemini Juno, funny guys are my absolute weakness😩😩 Gemini Sun men also. In fact just all men with Gemini placements. Does this apply to you guys with your Juno placement?
🍿Aquarius risings are so cool, love them😚
🍿Since the 12th house rules bed pleasures, how many of your 12th housers like really and i mean REALLY like your bed. Like in fact do you guys ever like leaving your house?
🍿If you have Uranus in the 4th house, if you’d like to, tell me what your family does that you think no other family does🤔
🍿Everytime I have my Moon in the 8th house in my lunar return chart, something always comes to an end. Do you guys notice the same thing with your lunar return charts or nah
🍿Not an observation but I have Pluto in the 8th house at 29 degrees for my solar return chart this year and I am a little frightened icl… have any of you guys had this placement in your sr charts? If so, what happened that year?
🍿Living on your Saturn MC line is soooo tough😩feeling like life is harder for you than most ppl is NOT it😭😭
🍿Leo Risings, do your relationships ever stem from a friends to lovers type situation or nah?
🍿Now i know i’ve mentioned this before in a previous post but I just wanna say again that having a Moon-Chiron conjunction in your sr chart absolutely sucks. A year where you can really be going through it😖😖😖
🍿I currently have Neptune in the 1st opposite mars AND mercury in the 7th house in my sr chart and i can tell you that the daydreaming about being in a relationship has gone into overdrive…😔
🍿I also have my 5th house ruler conjunct chiron in my sr chart and heartbreak has occurred… so if you have it in your sr chart you may wanna brace yourself😫
(I thought my sr chart was gonna be really good but I was unfortunately blind to every other placement in my chart but my major 7th house stellium… REMEMBER GUYS A 7TH HOUSE STELLIUM CAN INDICATE GAINING BEST FRIENDS AND DOES NOT GUARANTEE YOU A RELATIONSHIP😭😭
🍿A more straightforward observation but having Chiron in the 11th house of a SR chart can indicate losing some friends… like not necessarily in the typical way where you guys fall out, but it could be a scenario where they move away, or you guys can’t see each other as often for whatever reason.
🍿I feel like living on your Saturn MC line can also indicate getting into more problems with authority figures and more so them starting problems with you… they can turn into absolute f***ing b****rds out of nowhere… sorry i just have some trauma with members of authority😭😭
🍿I have my sun at 10 degrees and a 10th house stellium… I wonder if thats why i’ve always felt like i had an old soul… this is probably why my family always says to me that i’m a grandma😭😭
🍿7th house ruler in the 10th house of a sr chart can indicate meeting someone at work
🍿In a few months Jupiter will conjunct my natal Juno… I wonder what’ll happen then?🤔
🍿I feel like Gemini Mercury’s multitask a lot. Like A LOT. It’s almost tiring to watch them do it tbh😭
🍿I feel like having a Leo ruled 5th house can indicate attracting partners who worship you.
This was different from my other observations but I hope you guys still enjoyed it😭
Check my pinned for more💖
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gay-jesus-probably · 1 year ago
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Let me just preface this by saying everyone is allowed to have their own opinions, TOTK is a really fun game, and I'm glad that other people have been able to enjoy the story as well.
...But I'm being dead serious with my complaints about the narrative being 100% imperialist propaganda. And I'm getting really tired of people replying to those posts by saying it can't be imperialist propaganda, because imperialism is bad and the game says that Hyrule is the good guys.
Like, guys. That's not the argument you think it is. Yes, I am aware that the game tells us Ganondorf is a flat, one dimensional character with no ambitions, interests or motivations beyond destroying the entire world for the hell of it, and also it's totally not racist because he's green, not brown like literally every other member of his race. Unfortunately literally all of these things are kind of the entire goddamn problem.
See, the thing is, everyone trying to make these arguments is accepting the game at face value. Hyrule is the perfect and almighty nation chosen by the demigod Zonai, and whose royal family has the right to rule due to their divine heritage. The other races exist to serve the glory of Hyrule, and they're happy to do it. Ganondorf is pure evil and must be stopped at any costs.
But that's not how anything works. The story informing me that Hyrule is the ultimate good that has done nothing wrong is the whole goddamn reason why I don't trust Hyrule at all. There's always more of a reason than that. And the game fucking suggests there was more going on! Ganondorf mentions Rauru has repeatedly 'invited' the Gerudo to become Rauru's subjects, and let's be clear here, it doesn't matter how peaceful those 'invitations' were, when the guy who owns every single magical nuclear missile in the world repeatedly demands you surrender to him, there's always going to be an implied threat of 'do it or get magically nuked'. Just that power difference alone shows us exactly why Ganon would feel threatened enough to invade. It's because Rauru was holding a gun to his head, and Ganon was expected to just trust that he'd never pull the trigger.
And yes, even if it wasn't intentional Hyrule was always threatening to wipe out the other nations, considering the entire royal family walked around openly wearing their magical nukes as cute accessories. If they couldn't be safely hidden away, there wouldn't be four other secret stones sitting untouched in a vault until the last second.
But that's never acknowledged. Of course Hyrule is the only nation with the right to the secret stones; even if other races get to touch them, they can only have them if they swear eternal blind loyalty and servitude to the glory of King Rauru and Princess Zelda. Ganon wanting to have one magical nuclear bomb out of a stockpile of eight of them is proof that he's dangerous and evil. I mean my god, what if he just walked around all day wearing a magical nuke and using its power for his own benefit, that would be terrifying. It's only okay when Hylian royalty does it.
And you can't argue that Ganon betrayed his own people, considering we don't get to know fucking anything about his relationship with his people. He's shows as the leader of the Gerudo, we're told he's a hero to his people, he has soldiers that loyally follow him into battle... and then oh nevermind, they all hate him and will spend eternity trying to atone for sharing a race with him. How did the entire race do a complete 180 in the span of at most a few months? Who cares, what's important is that now they accept they exist to serve Hyrule so they get to be the good guys now and we don't need to know why they were following Ganondorf, or why they stopped following him.
Basically my point is that yeah, I fucking know how the game insists everything went down. That's the entire reason I think it's imperialist propaganda, because the entire story feels like Hylian propaganda to conceal and justify some horrific atrocities that caused all of this. I literally do not believe that I'm getting the story through reliable narrators, especially considering that the only people allowed to actually tell me the story are all the characters that have the most reasons to be heavily biased in favour of Hyrule.
When the game shows me protagonists that have a massive amount of power and control over the entire world, then says the bad guy doesn't like that system just because he's evil, and literally nothing and nobody in the game says anything to oppose that take, I have some questions about what the fuck the story isn't telling me. And I'd really appreciate it if people would stop trying to argue with me just by telling me to stop asking those questions.
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ohtobeleah · 3 months ago
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Secret Sacrifices // Jake Seresin
Chapter Four: [Like Father, Like Daughter]
Summary: You receive news from your case worker about a family member, its sends you into a spiral. Bob is awol from the Hard Deck and Jake is constantly up to his old tricks.
Warnings: Death, mentions of witness protection. Jake Seresin x F!reader
Word Count: 3k
Author Note: Been trucking along at this series. Really trying to spend a little time each day writing a few paragraphs for some projects. And I really do LOVE these two.
Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist
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Throughout history, there has always been a superstition that expands across many belief systems. Mirrors can be seen as a portal to another dimension; the reflection staring back at you is another version of yourself. Another version of you from another timeline or realm. 
If that were true, you’d give anything to trade places with the reflection staring back at you as you caught a glimpse of yourself in the small hallway mirror that hung for aesthetics. 
“What do you mean?” Your voice shook with confusion, this couldn’t be real. This couldn’t be happening. “Roger, what the fuck do you mean my dad died?” 
Roger Spague was your case agent. He had been assigned your case right after the funerals of your husband and son. Soon after everything occurred, you were encouraged to enter witness protection to safeguard your testimony. As the only witness who could help bring the men who murdered your family and organised a multilevel drug syndicate to justice, your word was more valuable than gold itself. 
“We couldn’t tell you,” Roger has always been a rather hard nut to crack. He took no bullshit and smiled very rarely. He saw the world for black and white more than he ever did grey. Morals were good or bad, nothing could be in between. “He, unfortunately, passed away a month ago, we’ve been informed of the burial site, Hollow Hills. However, we really advise against you visiting anytime soon,” Rogers’s monotone voice echoed in your head as you struggled to hold your composure. 
“Why? Why would I not run out this door right now to visit my father’s fucking grave you asshole!” You hissed into the phone. Surely this was all some sick joke or a nightmare that never ended. You couldn’t think straight, couldn’t breathe properly. You were almost certain your heart was breaking apart yet again. The shattering pieces would surely slice into your arteries, causing you the bleed out and be at peace with the pain you’d carried for over three years. 
“Because they could be monitoring the site, do you really want to risk everything you’ve worked so hard to protect?” Roger reminded you through the phone. At this stage, you were sure that all the tears you’d cried over the years had permanently stained your cheeks. Maybe one day you’d wake up with no more tears left to cry. 
“Roger–” You sobbed as you made your way into your bedroom. You slumped onto the side and crumpled in on yourself. The only support system keeping you up was your elbows digging into your knees “I can’t do this anymore.” 
“You don’t have a choice to quit this,” Roger, with his little sympathise and tunnel vision, reminded you. “You don’t get to leave this until those bastards are behind bars, and we’ve put too much work into this to have you throw it all away now.” 
“But he’s my dad,” You never got to say goodbye. You never got to tell him how much you loved him, how much you still and always will. You never got to hold your mother or comfort your sister. Everything you’d missed, everything you’d sacrificed was starting to outway the idea, the pipe dream of justice. You were, at the very basic explanation, tired of this life. “I need to visit his grave.” 
“Not until we know for certain that there isn’t anyone monitoring his grave just waiting for you to show up.” The reality was hard to accept, you didn’t want to accept it. But the fact of the matter was, that you have just lost another member of your family, and there was absolutely nothing you could do to help yourself forgive that loss. 
“Fuck you,” You spat as tears spilled over your lower lash line. “Fuck you and fuck all of this do you hear me?” 
“No skin off my nose there, just remember why you’re doing this, who you’re doing this for, Y/n.” Just hearing your real name, and hearing those syllables leave someone’s mouth made you feel real. That you were still a real person with real emotions and valid feelings. “Remember what’s a stake here, they get the chance to kill you now? Then what’s all this been for?” 
“I hate you–” Was all you were able to get out before you broke down completely, deciding that the floor was the best place to be. You hung up the phone and made sure to throw it as far away as you possibly could. 
The carpet soaked up as many tears as possible before you fell asleep crying, sobbing until your eyes could no longer remain open and a steady rhythm took over in your chest. Sleep….it never came easy, but you needed it. 
By the time you slowly opened your eyes again, the sun had risen higher in the sky and the ice cream you’d brought in your weekly shop was melted into a puddle of liquid. You knew as you slowly peeled yourself off the carpet that you had to get yourself together before you lost the plot. So you trailed out into the hallway and made your way back to the kitchen to put away your groceries. The bags still sat where you and Jake had left them on the island bench. 
“You’re okay,” It was two simple words, but the lies that read between the lines were big enough to make them seem like a whole novel of untruthful affirmations. “You’re okay,” Again you repeated the same two words as you unpacked your groceries. “You’re okay.” Hoping that if you said them enough……
You’d hopefully start to believe them. 
***~***~***~***~***~***~***~
Cutting lemons was one of those mundane tasks you actually enjoyed. It gave you something to do while zoning out. You’d only been at work for roughly an hour before the patrons started to pile in after work. Naval men and women from all walks of life all heading to the local watering hole. It wasn't too long after you started on your fourth lemon that Jake made his appearance in your peripheral vision. There was no doubt that his proximity to you was the cause behind your palpitations. 
Jake stood on the other side of the bar, smiling his signature shit-eating grin at you while he watched your knife skills. 
“What's a guy gotta do to get you to handle him like that lemon?” Trust Jake to lead with the unorthodox hello. When you looked up and met your gaze, you knew you were in deep water. The smile that smeared itself across your face was as genuine as it could ever be. 
“I didn’t know you were into knife play Seresin?” You saw the way Jake's eyes slightly widened with promiscuous enlightenment at your reply. “You just after the usual?” You asked as you placed the knife you’d been using into the sink. 
“Yes ma’am, and to see the pretty barkeep,” Jake replied as he sat down on one of the empty barstools. He looked far too handsome in his flight suit, but you’d never tell him that. His ego was already inflated enough. 
“Penny! Hangman here to see you!” You called out as you washed your hands from all the lemon juice. Jake wouldn’t deny it if you asked that his eyes had dropped from looking at your hair to your ass as you turned around briefly to dry them on the rag that sat nearby. 
“I was talking about you–” He smiled as you turned back around to face him. His elbows were resting against the top of the bar, casually, like he was truly at home. 
“Bet you say that to all the ladies–”  You added as you picked up a glass, going about making Jake his usual order. 
“Nope, just you.” It was quiet, a little more serious with an underlying sense of admiration. Jake meant it, he thought you were gorgeous. From the moment he first met you, he saw all the beauty and grace that seamlessly radiated from your aura. “I think you’re beautiful, Brewer.” 
Jake's complement knocked the wind from your lungs as you held the glass at an angle and watched the amber liquid pool at the bottom. Slowly but surely filling the glass to the top with a perfect head of froth. 
“What did I tell you about flattery?” You sighed as you placed the beer down in front of the aviator who was slowly capturing your whole heart in the palm of his hands. Completely unaware that he was falling in love with a complete stranger. 
“That it won’t get me anywhere–” Jake grinned, reaching into his pocket for his wallet. “But if I remember correctly, it did.” The sensation of having Jake’s lips pressed against yours came flooding back as the heat in your cheeks rose. “Let me take you out to dinner?” 
“Jake,” You had to sigh. “Not this again?” Playing a little hard to get wouldn’t hurt the man, would it? 
“Or come over to mine then?” Jake proposed with a cheeky Serein grin you assumed he got from his mother. 
“Oh yeah?” You chuckled as you let your hands rest on your bar, leaning in a little closer to Jake. “So I can contract whatever deceases you’re harbouring in that petri dish of a bachelor pad?” Jake pretended to be wounded as he placed a hand over his chest at your remark. You shook your head as you let out a small laugh. “I don’t think so, Seresin, but I’ll give you points for trying.” 
Jake sat there momentarily, just drinking in the sight of the woman who had slowly become his favourite person to be around. This was his favourite part of the entire day. Getting to come to the Hard Deck, sit on his stool by the bar and talk to you. He thought about you all day long. About all the ways you did our hair and those mom jeans that hugged your waist just right. He’d catch himself thinking about the way you humbly count your tips at the end of each night, or the way you laugh with Fanboy over the most insane things. He would often daydream about your smile, your eyes, and your ability to captivate the entire bar. 
“Fine,” Jake knocked his knuckles on the wood of the bar as he rose to his feet once again. “Suit yourself, but just for the record, I like my bachelor pad very much.” For as much as Jake truly did love his quick, tidy and rather put-together home, he sure wouldn’t have minded the slightest bit if you lived there too. 
“I think the local community of gonorrhoea would say the same.” You took the card Jake was handing over. “Starting a tab?” 
“Depends, what’s Bradshaws looking like?” Jake was always the first to add an extra beer or three onto Bradley’s outstanding tab. You were always the first person to turn a blind eye then doing so. As you looked up Roosters name in the system the number was much higher than you originally expected. It seemed as though the boys had well and truly been taking advantage of Rooster’s current love-hate relationship with the Hard Deck barkeep. 
“Eh, he owes me a couple hundred.” You smiled softly back at Jake as you placed his card in the draw. 
“Yeah, start a table angel, gives me more of an excuse to linger,” Jake replied with a genuine smile, his eyes were soft and swirling with ease. He’d never felt this way about a woman before. You gentled him to a point where if you asked him tomorrow to run away with you, he’d follow you to the end of the world.
“I’m sure that’s called stalking–” You sighed as you turned around momentarily to pick up your knife and head back to cutting your lemon slices. 
“Consider me your biggest fan then, Brewer.” Jake grinned ear to ear as he took a sip of his beer, heading off toward the pool table where you knew he’d be for the next few hours.
***~***~***~***~***~***~***~
The Hard Deck was rather busy for a Monday afternoon. The bar was in high spirits as you manoeuvred yourself around the floor collecting empty glasses and cans. You could feel Jake’s eyes burning into you as you spoke to patrons and cleaned up tables. But there was one person you hadn’t seen yet that you needed to talk to desperately. Bob. 
“Where’s our resident underage drinker this evening gentlemen?” You cooed as you made your way over to your favourite group of aviators. “And Nix.” You added as you gave Phoenix a side hug. 
“Haven’t seen him actually?” Fanboy replied, his answer wasn’t one you wanted to hear. Usually, if someone wasn’t here by this time of the night then they weren’t coming at all. You really needed to speak to Bob. 
“Do you think he'll be in?” You questioned as you let go of Phoenix and went about collecting empty glasses. You knew Bob had annual leave coming up, he'd been talking about it for weeks now. 
“Why the sudden obsession with Bob, Brewer?” Rooster chimed in. “You guys on the down low or something?” That very question had Jake's blood boiling. You could see the jealousy clear as day smeared across his face from across the pool table.
“I’m uh—” It came out before you knew what you were saying. “I'm seeing someone, casually, it's really new.” Your eyes very quickly glanced over at Jake who now wore that same smug grin that he normally wore. Only this time his eyes were swirling with administration. “It's not Bob, but I appreciate your interest in my love life, Bradshaw.” 
“Lord help the man who ends up under your control,” Bradley rolled his eyes with a deep resentment you couldn't quite understand. The feud between the pain of you was something that formed from a mere misunderstanding. Surely the two of you could let bygones be bygones and move on. 
“An apology will wipe that ever-mounting tab clear Bradshaw, you know that.” You teased as you made your way back to the bar. You could feel the back of your throat growing tighter, and the sting of holding back tears that had become an all too familiar sensation began to grow. You couldn’t keep yourself busy enough to forget your dad was dead and no one, not a single soul had told you of his passing until he was six feet under. No amount of work could keep your mind from trailing to all the memories that played aloud in your mind, drowning out the mundane chatter from patrons. 
“Can I get another beer sweetheart?” You hear one of the men say as he held his head up with the palm of his hand. He was using his elbow as an anchor, keeping him from slumping over onto the bar. 
“Sure, what are you drinking?” You facked a smile so easily readable that Jake saw right through it from across the Hard Deck. He could sense that you were off, something wasn’t right. One minute you were happy, the next he didn't recognise the look in your eyes. 
“Whatever you don’t mind tasting after you finish your shift.” The man said with the confidence of a much taller man. It made the damn burst inside you. Fuck this and fuck everything. 
“Careful, the succulent reminder of your own inadequacies walking this way might cause a scene real quick if you don’t back off.” The problem was simple, you’re doing it all on your own. Choosing to stay all closeted in your own little bubble, longing for love, friends and family. Scared of death, scared of life, taking it out on those who tried to get close. But as Jake walked towards the bar, you felt like you could rely on him. He made you feel safe even if being around you put him in unimaginable danger. “That’s what I thought too.” You chuckled to yourself as the man nodded and sighed. 
“You good?” Jake asked as he decided against following the first of many of Penny’s rules for the residence group of aviators. Mavericks rag-tag team of adopted children. The first and most important being no aviators behind the bar. Jake, however, didn’t care. 
“I feel like I’m rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic here,” You growled as you poured the man his beer. The last one you were going to pour him for the night. “My life is falling apart around me and here I fucking am pouring beers for America’s best and brightest tax-guzzling fighter pilots.” 
Jake could very much sense that something was wrong, this wasn’t like you. He thought, however, since your shared moment in your apartment yesterday, that he had some sort of upper hand here over all the others. 
“You need to take a break, just pause for a second.” Jake placed his hand softly on your shoulder as he stood behind you. Whatever was going on inside your head was bleeding out into reality. 
The feeling broke you. Jake’s touch, it wasn’t your husband’s. The man you got killed. It was Jake’s touch that broke you from whatever restraints you had tangled yourself in. The barbed wire that cut you right to your bones. 
“No, you can’t just pause, because in real life the trauma doesn’t just stop,” You broke as you spun around into Jake’s chest. He was quick to look around as people from all walks of life looked around to bear witness to your impending mental breakdown. He caught Bradley’s gaze before anyone else's. Even the man who had unintentionally started a war with the new Hard Deck manager was worried about you. 
“Penny–” Jake sighed as he looked over at the woman who still ran the show from behind the scenes. She nodded in agreement, a silent one. One where it was now Jake’s responsibility to get you out of the Hard Deck before you could draw any more attention to yourself. 
“Let's go outside alright? Get some air–?” Jake tried to reason with you as you shook your head and balled your fist into his white cotton T. Your eyes swirled with a pain he’d never be able to process. A pain so unfathomable it sounded fictional. 
“God doesn’t work that way or whoever the fucks in charge of this godforsaken hell I’m living!! You can do absolutely everything right and still…. Good, people, die.” 
***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~***~**
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wisteriainslumber · 7 months ago
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baby twst headcanons
happy mothers day, have some disorganized tiny shenanigans feat. the twst women warnings: ch7 spoilers for draconia family members, siblings lying for fun (borderline malicious behaviour), foul language, and maybe a teensybitoftraumaoopsies
Riddle
if he could, he'd be an outside kid with tons of bug friends
secretly kept a caterpillar pet in a lil terrarium jar until it could fly on its own
he found it while it was raining outside and wanted to help it grow :(
my guy was a sickly victorian child
rarely would three months go by without riddle falling ill
he has dyslexia. without the pressure of having to get everything right on the first try, riddle can kinda enjoy reading now because he gets to learn new words and concepts at his own pace
deep in the corner of his room sits a journal with only half if it filled out. most of the entries start like 'i read a new book today' immediately followed by something like 'i do not understand life'
he actually can't bear to read the contents of the more recent diaries, but he equally can't bear to throw them away (not until he can send his younger self a letter that it will all be okay)
his only connection to other people his age were trey and che'nya
and on the occasions where trey was absent che'nya would 'teach riddle about the queendom of roses'
most of the time he fed him lies and riddle believed him
and most of the time riddle would yell at che'nya for being confusing and not clear enough
you can't just tell him that the hat man haunts him at night then reply with "what hat man?" when riddle asks for clarification
like !!! the hat man you just told him about !! (which gets him a reply of "who told you about?" damn you che'nya)
his favourite childhood memory was going out with them to get matching pins together
he still wears his little crown pin today!!
cats would frequently perch on his windowsill and riddle likes to watch them lounge in the sun and wonder what cats think about
(che'nya claims to know but riddle has never seen the beastman talk to a single cat)
but kitty-speak was riddle's first learned animal linguistic. he would practice by talking to the regular cat by the window
it stopped showing up for a while and then came back with four kittens and riddle smuggled them for a good... three anxiety-riddled hours before telling the cat their babies will be well taken care of with che'nya instead
riddle may had to give up those kittens that day but owning a pet cat will be in his future soon. #manifest
Trey
it was a massive game of follow the leader in the clover household
when mama clover was carrying flour over to the patisserie, you'll see the mini clovers carrying small bowls and utensils to help
easy bake oven user
but he was ass at it
legend says his unique magic manifested at age 10 when it was mommas birthday and he baked a really shitty cookie, so he prayed to the queen that his mum would think it tasted nice and it did :D
his siblings took a bite out of the rest of the batch and wretched very dramatically
had his hands full trying to convince che'nya to not eat the glass he found on the sidewalk because it 'looks crunchy'
in fact, whenever talking to adults, trey never refers to che'nya by his nickname but his entire full name. he just wants you to know!! also che'nya is a nickname for friends and family >:(
trey's room has always been free reign for his other siblings, they treat it like a common room
why? mostly because they don't have permission to do anything fun without supervision but big brother trey can to be their supervision :)) right :)))
the clover household is no longer shocked by che'nyas abrupt presence in their house. he seems to favour a certain corner of the house and most of the material on trey's bed
theres usually an extra set of utensils by their table in case che'nya appears. there used to be two extra sets but.. you know🫠
his siblings started a game of hiding as many rubber ducks in trey's room without him noticing
but after they permanently clogged the pipes of the toilet with their duckies, they switched to ugly stickers all over trey's bicycle
howEVER, it happens to be their bicycle now because trey outgrew it and had to get a new one. have fun cleaning the stickers :D
unofficial designated seats at the table and in the family car. real fights have broken out over the siblings because of these spots
still fears basketballs to this day because his brother threw one and trey happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and he woke up with the wrong accent. oh, and a concussion
Cater
all brands but barbie was ruined for caycay
his sisters used him as a mannequin to practice makeup
he had extremely elaborate revenge plans to pin them on the other sister but would get his ass whooped if he was caught
of course, that never stopped him from being extremely crafty to get out of trouble :)
referring to himself in third person cutely was a learned behaviour for survival™
it never worked in his household but it surely worked with other kids his age
collecting pity points but at what cost
had a girlfriend on club penguin for two months and got publicly dumped on club penguin
banned from club penguin because he wouldnt leave her alone and she reported him
sold off his sisters rainbow looms
those kids that are cognitively gifted such as he thought the people in the tv were trapped in there and then asked his mom if they were also in a tv and trapped
whenever dad worked in the office, cater would sit in the big boss chair and 'help', which meant that he was sorting coins and bills based off colour
he also told his dad to wash the money because it looked dirty on the corners
whenever he and his sisters played together, they'd tried to open the compartments of their toys and cater had so much fun with the screwdriver and taking stuff apart
also owned a joint notebook with his sisters. there would be things like poems, drawings, and the hair of ruined barbie dolls taped inside
cater has his own journal though, and he composes very emo poems in there. all written in glitter gel pen. cater would later look back on these and cringe but the more you read, the more you kinda get into it. it is a tad bit profound... for an eight year old, that is
Ace
demented ass doll player
his version of fun was making his dolls de-limb each other and throw them into a big pit to summon his darth vador figurine
whatever in-game ace is, that was his brother except he was significantly worse
my boy ace was the number 1 victim of big bro trappola
ate brown paint chips, which was 'chocolate' according to his brother
was locked inside the bathroom while his brother whispered bloody mary into the walls
sat through horror movies to prove he was a big boy and shit his pants when his brother recreated the jumpscares in the middle of the night
until he got a little older and started outsmarting him
now the trappola brothers team up to terrorize everyone else
its a competition for the brothers to compete over who can spoil the plot of which movie first
weaponized the slap bracelets
sucked milk out of plushies. no i will not elaborate
he's a jump rope champion! and it carries over to those skipper hoops as well
he does prefer the skipper hoops over the rope simply because there are um... ankle shattering consequences if you miss a jump, which meant it was perfect for sharing with the neighbourhood kids! gotta keep those stakes high, ya know?
tried to do a lot of magic tricks to impress papa trappola
made his brother take him to the amusement park and big bro got MAD tips because everyone thought ace was so cute, and quote unquote 'an angel'
like NO HES NOT???? if only big brother trappola knew ace picked up his charisma from him😭
Deuce
grew up with 80s movies, he thinks every that happens in those movies are true stories
he was always presented with old gadgets to 'fix' so its now something he can do pretty well; restoring old devices
the kids his age thought he was like wayyy too old fashioned, like born in the wrong generation
bike kid. if he wasnt inside he was on wheels
he kept a barbie doll in his bike basket and always made sure she wore her helmet (she was the bike guard)
slept with eggs and held them in his hands hoping to hatch a baby chick
thinks teachers live at the school
super sweet child. he's the first at the other kids' side if they got hurt
at the same time he is the biter kid. especially on fathers day
loves reading stories with grandma. whenever she came over, he would bring her a book
he'd also stick around the kitchen and try to see what she was doing. he thought that maybe he could learn to cook a few things by himself so they had more time together
in times like these he would be internally angry at his father because?? grandma is always working, mum is always working, fuck that guy specifically.
easter is his favourite holiday. his family have a tradition of egg painting and deuce used to hide caramel candies in them because grandma liked them
best helper kid around. will hold the dustpans and stuff while Dilah was sweeping
knew the names of all the trucks his mum drove and also a lot of the mechanical part names
had a habit of accidentally breaking things like clocks so he learned quickly how to fix them back up
his grandma takes him shopping for stamps so deuce can send mail to his house, addressed to his mum
Leona
parkour child
bounced all around the palace, climbing the trees outside and everything. gotta keep those claws sharp
before his father fell ill, the kingscholar family used to have lil picnics with Kifaji outside
without fail, leona would always find the highest seat or a nice sun rock to rest upon
unconsciously, even now, leona finds immense comfort in sun rocks
followed his brother around everywhere
when he couldn't catch up, Falena would give him piggy back rides while he was going about his day
asked him many questions bc hes curious about the world
would ask him difficult questions he already knew the answer to just to see Falena struggle lol
whenever tiny leona got tuckered out, his brother would carry him back to bed in lieu of the servants
leona insisted on sitting in the conference room with his dad to gain insight on how kingdom affairs were run
papa kingscholar agreed since it would be good exposure for them, and leona was the one who took notes, Falena would point out the participants at the table and quietly introduce them to leona
ruined the lives of people he played chess with. imagine being bested by a nine year old in chess. the shame.
after Falena got married, leona shifted his studies from maintaining amicable kingdom relationships to medicinal research and ancient curses
the palace staff thought it was out of malice, but leona wanted to focus more on the properties of magic now
(and also, well, based on the new target on his brother, his new sister-in-law, and his nephew, there can never be too many precautions..)
even when he was a tiny child he did whatever he fancied
his servants may have told him that tending to a servant's hair was below his stature but that only made him sneakier when making tiny braids in Kifaji's hair
git gud g
Ruggie
another crafty child
aye, when it depends on your survival, you learn to use those legs of yours to run like the wind
even worse he was a small ass child so he was hard to find
snuck into schools and pretended he could talk to ghosts and charged the kids a quarter to talk to a ghost for them
mental math god. from multiplication to geometry and time, ruggie knows the most efficient ways to get the job done, as well as a few backup plans
would sew up little felt dolls for his neighbourhood friends
left the house to do a bunch of odd jobs and picked up quite a few languages, which meant even more jobs all around, and now he has some pretty unique talents
like, he can preform acrobat tricks! and he can also paint a house upside down. oh, and he can travel quickly on one foot! (don't ask)
oh yeah, ruggie had a huge slime stand
he would make so much slime and sell it off and it made mad bucks but he also absolutely hated slime. what a good waste of detergent and glue, honestly... >:(
and people wanted them different colours and with charms and the like. at least it was a thriving market, but ruggie cannot stand the sight of slime ever since he retired from the slime scene
really liked rubiks cubes because it was like painting a little puzzle. also, when the children got bored of it, they would try to detach the squares and put them on the faces they desired
it was so funny to watch because they will use the oddest tools and tricks to dislodge the squares (like tying a shoelace around a square and trying to tug it off like you do with baby teeth)
ruggie also made lots of origami as seasonal decor :D his grandma really like the flowers and birds he would fashion
this IS canon but i want you to know that he would take the neighbourhood kids and rotate the group around houses in different costumes to get more halloween candy. everyone stan ruggie
Jack
he has younger siblings so his sense of justice was in his personality wayy back then
got to be an exemplar big bro for them💪
whenever they were playing castle, jack was always the princess because his sister wanted to be the heroic knight
if you asked jack, he would say that his sister only wanted to be the knight as an excuse to beat the shit out of his brother
wanted piercings but couldnt get them pierced so his sister gave him sticker earrings
they did not work nor stick very well but he loved him
let his siblings bite him, it seems to be their preferred mode of affection
sometimes they will wordlessly enter his room just to bite him and chill
often had playdates with vil when he was home
jack still doesn't quite know what the difference was between all these water brands vil was showing him but the spirit is there
oftentimes vil was alone in the house so the two played grown up and cooked by themselves
vil had told his dad that they were married because jack would come over and had sleepovers a lot
jack has a big green thumb. he wanted to plant a garden but he started with succulents first because they are notoriously hard to kill
by now he's ready to advance but every time he goes to get different plants, he comes back with more succulents haha
the plants under jack's care are happy enough to bloom flowers, and he gives them to his mama
if vil learned a spell, he would teach jack and vice versa. the BIGGEST supporters of each other. friendship is magic, guys
the first time they learned colour changing spells was an entire mess and vil was bawling in a panic by the end of it because they dyed Eric Venue's favourite couch bright blue and didn't know how to reverse it
jack wanted to call vil's dad to tell him but he ended up calling the wrong number and thought they were in trouble so he ended up bawling too
whenever vil wasn't in the class, no doubt jack is going to question his whereabouts
oddly, jack and neige have never interacted and only found out about vil being their mutual friend well into their teen years
Azul
like ruggie, was a master hider
unless he wants to be found, you will never find him
learned how to read earlier than kids his age because he wanted to prove he could spell big words to his mama
he may have cried a lot as a kid but do you know what that means? FREE black paint!! SUCK IT, PLEBS.
my boy was an astounding artiste, its why hes so creative with getting his way
azul is a visual learner, and always finished books a little slower because he REALLY analyzes all the pictures like downright dissects it
his grandma suggested art as a way to express himself while also making sense of the world around him
even though he thinks his old drawing of him and the twins is outdated in terms of his skill level now, he has a sentimental attachment to it and keeps it in his room always
trading trinkets was a common thing between the trio aka the twins would pop by
mama ashengrotto adored the twins bc they adored azul('s mom that is)
also inherited a beautiful singing voice from mama ashengrotto. he and his grandma would bond by playing the piano and singing. sometimes, they'd do a little show at his mom's restaurant
red hair was seen as very attractive in the coral sea and he very regrettably colour-magicked his hair
it was not the shade he wanted, but he was curious on what was, so with the many complex spells he learned at his age, he experimented with different lengths, colours, and styles until he restored it back to its original form
there remains one surviving picture of his red hair and it is kept in his stepdad's wallet (because its the only place azul wouldn't look!)
no azul is not aware pictures of his redhead era even exist
Jade
loved to weave necklaces and bracelets using shells and plants
gave a lot of necklaces made of sharks teeth to his family and azul because those are valued good luck charms!
it might also be because he loved to hunt sharks but he pretends thats not the reason :)
wandered off all the time and floyd always had to drag him back home before night
hes a curious boy, wanted to explore everything around him, especially the dangerous places
child leashes don't work in the sea but im sure mama and papa leech would have loved to have one anyway
was the main reason why he and his brother have separate rooms
too many petty "stop leaving your mess on my side (of the room)" and hissy fights had mama and papa leech mad
things definitely settled after they had separate rooms
sometimes if he got into trouble he would pretend he was floyd and sent his parents off to look for "jade"
highkey never worked but it never stopped him from trying
started a new method of using tears and his parents were more lenient with him after so he realized he can get away with things if he shed a few tears
he can cry on command and this is his primary weapon if scaring people off didnt work
will then pin it on the other party as if he didn't enable the fight
straight up told floyd lies growing up, that the pufferfish would crawl inside his ears when he sleeps, or that floyd was 'allergic' to seahorses, or that in order to get an angler mer to go away, floyd had to use bioluminescence
this carried over to land as well except jade didnt know whether his words were true or not he just straight up made things up
was also a very very sickly child. got ill extremely easily and is much more sensitive to temperature or water pressure changes
esp during pollen season? jade is gonna lose those lungs he just acquired from sneezing and coughing
Floyd
grade A hoarder
he sees something he likes? he's bringing it back home
unlike at NRC, the twins have separate rooms so the entire space is filled with a bunch of floyd's knickknacks (its why jade is always mad)
as soon as hes done playing with one he's found something else on his swims so his room is 80% things lying around
and when jade stole said knickknacks claiming it was his turn to play thats when floyd suddenly claimed that mermaid doll (that he highkey forgot existed) was his prized possession
back off jade thats his property😡
when he was younger, he loved looking and behaving exactly like jade, but as he got older he valued being his own person instead of an X2
is actually legitimately the older sibling by a few minutes and deliberately decides whether its his privilege or not whenever he can
but as soon as "because you're the oldest" is said he claims that none of them are older because they were born on the same day
to the outsider, it sounds like floyd is feeding jade a heap load of bs, but he likes gathering trivia and wording it so it *sounds* fake but really isnt
like that seahorses give birth via baby explosion
one exception to this rule is that floyd is constantly changing the story of how he met jade
one instance it was that they found each other, another was that some kid kept begging him for food and that later their mom said that was his sibling, other times, jade had allegedly died before floyd used his awesome magic to revive him
most of the time floyd tells jade that a whale shat him out and whatever came out of it looked so deformed and floyd thought jade was so soppy pathetic (in a cute way) so he brought him home
jade never tries to refute nor confirm any of these allegations but when the last story gets told he's always a little more passive aggressive with floyd that day
Kalim
sickly victorian child #2
its from all the poison attempts
and as a result he may or may not have tried mithraism so maybe its worse than we think😭
allergic as hell to bug bites too like someone please give them a electric racket
hide and seek is banned from the Asim household
at that point in his life, kalim had a good 6-7 siblings and letting them loose in a big household AND telling them to hide is a recipe for disaster
it was almost impossible for him to get in trouble too because no one was about to scold the heir of the house
workers of the Asim palace were absolutely not going to scold him and his parents had like fourteen other more rambunctious younger children
but don't be fooled, kalim is a very good seeker when it matters! he can spend hours focused on finding something important, so those hide and seek games were banned for a VERY good reason when kalim was out at night searching and didn't return the next morning (meaning he got childnapped)
oh, whats a little kidnapping but a minor setback? hes fine and in one piece, the doctor triple-checked! anyways, who's ready for another round of hide and seek??
every now and then, kalim falls victim to the good ole' midnight hour and kitchen scissors hair disaster. no, no one learns
the birds and random animals in the Asim park (that's right, his private park..) all have names and kalim visits them often to befriend them
he's learned around a total of eight languages and he will personally translate (with jamil as the scribe) his own books so he can teach his younger siblings
even remembers all their favourite hobbies, genres, activities, etc, etc
the Asim children all have one thing in common and that is their love for bubbles, but who doesn't?
kalim spends time in the nrc lab to create the perfect bubble solution with big, long lasting bubbles. trust.
remembers faces, names, and even birthdays very well. you can always bet on kalim to wish a servant or one of his tutors a happy birthday!
to kalim, having someone know your name and be happy to see you is very important! so he wants his loved ones, guests, and servants to feel appreciated, especially on their very special days :)
Jamil
has the immune system of god he has survived all of the flu seasons without catching it himself
he and kalim played in the bird houses often
taught the parrots a bunch of silly words and phrases
Najima taught one of the parrots to only refer to jamil as 'stinky'
he and Najima claim they look nothing alike even though kalim and everyone else insists its true
the two siblings fought over particular hairbands while sitting next to an entire selection of them💀
Najima loved to fight over things that jamil wanted first just for the victory
yeah, even in childhood jamil never got a break. as if the universe would give him that
we all heard the silly goofy story of jamil shuffling around under a vase thinking he was all sneaky and shit. he has many more stories like this
such as climbing in trees (he only got stuck twice!), wrapping himself in cloth and slithering on the ground (very conspicuous!!), again, draping himself in fabric and trying to blend in with the walls (with a 50% chance of success) etc, etc.
he is SO good at hiding and has so many secret spots around Asim palace, trust him.
Najima?? literally sent him a picture of curry for his birthday to celebrate. the two constantly send each other a bunch of pictures of random rocks, disfigured trash, and all sorts of unsavory things with the caption 'look its you'
while other servants were renovating Asim palace, they told the kids not to run around, because someone could crack their head if they fell off the ladder/the ladder fell on them
so, like the curious kids they were, jamil, Najima, kalim, and a few of his siblings camped around the construction zone waiting for someone's skull to break
its just morbid curiosity, they weren't wishing ill upon anyone
Vil
'don't carry me! i can walk by myself!' but in a way to convince his dad to pick him up
loved being carried around but would never admit to it
partook in many sweets as a kid even though he limits himself now
had a tradition with neige to make hot chocolate every thursday after school. in the warmer seasons, they switched to making their own fruit juice with the blender
from whole kiwis, to sweet potatoes, and ginger roots, it evolved to throwing random things in the machine to see what kind of funky juice would be made
our dear Eric Venue thinks this is so cute he has no problem with it as long as they dont waste food and clean up after. it would be a good habit to learn
plus vil looks so happy because he thinks operating a blender is such a grown up thing to do
1000% ate things he wasn't supposed to
the lipsmacker smelled so good though :(
when he failed a spelling bee and didnt want his papa to be disappointed in him the most logical thing in his seven year old mind was to eat the test
ripped it up and munch munched on the paper
and that had been his primary solution to bad grades until he was able to get in a good study technique (that, and his stomach rejecting the paper)
HORRENDOUS handwriting and it was because he tried to trick himself into being left-handed for a good portion of his life because the Beautiful Queen was left-handed >:(
also had trouble with enunciation from learning very big words. Eric can understand him but a bit of speech therapy and musical training helped
(if you're lucky, you'll still hear hints of it when vil's extremely sleepy)
often made friendship bracelets with, like, no one to give them to
traded a few with jack because vil taught him how to make them. jack thought that they would be a nice thing to give to the rest of his family, and made a few for vil in exchange
Rook
you think him crawling around on the dirt was a recent thing? hell no this was a learned childhood behaviour
he may not have had a bow back then but he had rocks and a will to play
and by will to play i mean he would pelt a lot of things with rocks
his old teachers had to placate him by teaching him how to skip stones on the lake for every one else's safety
only members of his own family were willing to play hide and seek with him
mostly because he is a terrifying seeker. you hide in the bushes and not two seconds later you hear those loud ass military grade boots stomping in your direction
ik no one wanted to play hide & seek with his ass. he only got worse after he developed his unique magic
helped paint his family's nails bc he had such a precise hand
its probably the nail polish fumes that made him this way. among 10 million other things
you know how kids would give each other cards and lolipops on valentines day?
well, on heart's day, rook would have drawn a picture of all his recipients and attach a cool leaf or flower to it
its very adorable and extremely thought out. his old recipients still think of him to this day (real)
rook had very nice penmanship even at a young age. he started by replicating his fathers handwriting and liked the flow of cursive and flair of a signature (rook has made a lot of personal signatures for himself)
had a wax stamp phase where he would dry out and collect a bunch of flowers and presses to make wax stamps
he still is crazy about wax stamps but now he can carve his OWN presses with his OWN knife 👍👍
made homemade twisttube videos at home with his siblings. they range from movie scene recreations, lip sync videos, or full on original scripts
be assured that the costumes, lighting, acting, and editing were rather top tier for their age, and it is because rook's family is exuberant like him (all cutie pies!!)
Epel
mud pie maker
he and the chickens in his village go wayyy back
didn't need animal linguistics to understand the clucks
uhh hey did anyone else have the experience of having pet chickens and then having them disappear and reappear on the dinner table??
im not saying it happened but im also not saying it didn't happen
he does brush his hair. the only reason he hates it when vil brushes his hair is that he feels like his scalp is getting scraped off
the only way to get epel to bathe was to use those three-in-ones because he would never sit still
those children that get dirty thirty minutes after you bathe them. sigh
overlined his lips with his ma's lipstick because ma used it to look nice before going to sell their produce, and epel wanted to help with sales this time. you can probably guess what happened after
the dislike for cosmetics is lifelong
(he did apologize by picking a handful of dandelions for his ma)
adrenaline junkie through and through. as soon as his legs were long enough to touch the pedal, he'd be operating the forklifts and in no way was it safe or responsible
fed the birds with seeds meant for their garden. they were hungry :(
fiddled around with the stray instruments on rainy days, now he can play in perfect harmony during celebrations with his relatives
epel has perfect pitch. destined for pomefiore all along <3
epel did not fear bees. he has potential for being a beekeeper but he didn't want to wear the bee suit
learned how to read and write very early in because he wanted to help out around the village. epel put checkmarks to confirm shipments and things
a bunch of his drawings are hung around the home
'helped' his grandma Marja knit by using the needle to stab the ball of yarn she needs to hand it to her
Idia
banning him from anything was impossible
locking your kids away from the cookie jar would work for anyone but idia. and not for the spiteful reason you think
makes him want to do it more because its interesting enough to stimulate his genius little brain
at that point he doesn't even want the cookie anymore
doing mental gymnastics to exploit loopholes. having a remote controlled airplane fetch him a cookie isn't going against his parents' word because technically he never touched the jar at all
which leads to extremely specific rules established in the shroud household
some notable ones include "severed limbs are only allowed in the staff freezers on halloween" and "no hacking the automated showers to chase down staff member C for thinking Premo are cuter than ortho"
his minecraft boyfriend broke up with him after they built their house together
it doesnt end there though, it never does. ortho took control of the pc to burn down the house and idia also got them banned. never underestimate the rage and revenge spirit of a child scorned
you know that thing about a devil and an angel on the shoulders? well, ortho was 90% the enabler for Bad Behaviour
and mostly because if idia was thinking of doing something, chances are, ortho was already doing said something
the S.T.Y.X staff often with the brothers were usually roped into playing video games and were happy to listen to whatever the boys felt like talking about
idia would bring new inventions to them and play a guessing game of what they think the function was
ortho stunk really bad at building things from scratch, but he was pretty good at memorizing the names of the parts to help idia
idia would ask the staff to take them to the observatory often. they would learn all about the constellations and idia liked to chart how they changed through the seasons
Ortho
his parents mostly had him because idia always got too creative when he was bored and thought having a new baby in the family would help idia fix up his behaviour, you know, be a good role model for ortho and all
... turns out, ortho would be pulling idia into all sorts of mischief. and worst of all, he ALWAYS GOT AWAY WITH IT.
he is tiny but mighty
lots of attitude in this little body
his favourite word was 'why'
him and idia had new nicknames for each other all the time
some of the time they were just kid things, most of the time they were a prize
whoever clears the extreme level with the highest score gets to make the other call him a nickname of their choosing
his received nicknames included such like "cosmic warrior", "lord of the shadow realm", and "the almighty" (when he beats idia's high score... after 5 losses in a row that is)
has no problem hacking the main S.T.Y.X system then blaming it on the employees for having weak security (some bs like 'im six and managed to break into the most secure network')
im sorry but i can't deny it. yes, ortho is an ipad kid and yes his ipad was disgusting
except ortho actually does listen to cyber security and he didn't have the passcode lock, he had the password lock, and it was changed every other week
(idia has accidentally locked the ipad on several occasions trying to guess the overly complicated password)
insane attachment in the sense that he will make up some bs reason (AND a forged research paper to further solidify it) on why he can't be separated from idia
if he were actually surrounded by children his age, just know ortho would've been the biter kid
weaponizes his cuteness just like jade but in a more ^^🌸 way
in these cases he will only refer to himself in third person because it pulls the most heartstrings
tugging on idias sleeves and telling him "ortho wants a cookie" had yielded better results for him than "i want a cookie"
and ortho is nothing if not a very smart boy
Malleus
fully believed that eating the seeds of watermelons would cause one to grow in your stomach
grandma Malificia found it too funny to correct him and to this day malleus still believes it
1/2 contributor to lilia's hairstyle. whenever lilia tried to make him take his bath he would spit fire
(until lilia let him play with the bubbles that was)
when he was a little kid and knew he was in trouble, he would hide in all sorts of places and pout
except he sucked at it. his hiding skill was between "if i dont see you, you cant see me", or his tail would be poking out behind the couches
usually the servants would turn the other way unless it was an emergency. because if malleus was found by anyone but the Queen or lilia, he'd have a toddler tantrum (he thinks they gave up on him)
spent most of his early days finding comfy nesting places or hunting for shiny things. there was nothing but Instinct in his little noggin until he could transform into a bi-pedal form
every day, without fail, he would get his horns stuck in something and throw a fit over it
testiest kid to ever test. when you tell mal he can't do something he'll do it bc he wants to understand why he can't do it
wanted to help grow the roses in his garden faster by summoning a thunderstorm that lasted three days and three nights
whatever tantrums you think malleus throws now are the most mild ones in his entire life
a younger malleus would summon entire hurricanes unknowingly and he would screech and babble in old fae tongue
a non-briar valley resident could easily mistake this for a demon summoning, but this is a normal tuesday in the palace
TRUST, malleus' temper is the tamest ever in the entire draconia lineage
the palace staff actually thank the witch of thorns for her mercy because this tantrum only burnt the entire east wing of the castle to the ground. the young prince is so tame !!
Lilia
straight out of a horror movie, this one
has the long dark hair and only wore long white dresses to really complete the look
loves walking around bare foot to connect with nature. that dress will be smeared with mud, fur, and berry juice (that were always red or purple tones, to everyones horror)
you all have lilia to thank for the inspiration to this horror trope
im talking wandering around in the dark, glowing magenta eyes, which appear red at times
sits SO still when its story time and the story is ancient curses and tomes
was also the kid that claimed they had a ghost friend and that his peers were being mean to "billy"
and no his family was probably the exact same way tbh
the fae are sturdy and lilia went without supervision for days
its quite a normal thing in his household
lilia would be fighting real ass ghosts in diapers and his mom would be cheering him on
the streaks are not from a goth phase but it was more of a 'the fruit juice in cranberries make really nice paint did you know??'
he also really loves tomato juice and it happens to be pretty too, so, why not?
it was originally red streaks but faded and he liked the pink better
one day he packed his bags and told his parents he was going to live in the afterglow savanna and his mom straight up joined him in packing
i like to believe that lilia did have edible food as a child but the army just ruined his tastebuds for Ever bc at that point, food was only a substance needed to live, it didn't have to be enjoyable
yeah, anyway it would be super funny if lilia's parents were good chefs, but lilia legit cannot tell the different between salt, flour, and white glitter
lilia was scooped up by Malificia mostly for his skill but it really turned out to be a glorified playdate for Meleanor
the princess was a mENACE and lilia could take her thunderbolts a bit better than the rest of her servants
(meaning that lilia was the only one that wouldn't be screaming bloody murder, he just would be hella mad and Meleanor thinks his audacity is funny)
Silver
lilias method of feeding him was waterboarding him with milk and that does not come without consequences
although lilia would go out often, its safe to say that silver was never really 'alone'
lilia would have a magical beacon on him at all times even if mal was babysitting, and he appreciates that the wildlife took a liking to silver
speaking of, silver had no concept of stranger danger no matter how much lilia told him so
every time malleus would come over silver would ask him to play murder mystery with his dolls
his first word was an attempt at malleus' name
they played together a lot it was really inevitable
helps worms and snails when it rains by helping them get under tree stumps or grass
played with axes & garden shears (thanks lilia)
2/2 contributor to lilia's hairstyle. and by that i mean he gave lilia a haircut with garden shears (that lilia fully encouraged so silver could 'build his repertoire of skills')
at this point lilias hair length was more of a liability since his sons loved to tug on it and one had a penchant for burning it
take your eyes off silver for one second and he's gone. he saw an ant, a bird, a cool statue, etc etc
loved all the fairytales lilia read him and always asked to be read the ones where true love reigned
him and malleus ran off together (more like mal whisked silver away) everywhere to play and explore
mal loved to show silver the most random things and he would always speak to him like a grown up
would often protest at the end of the day because he didn't want to part ways with him
their earlier conversations looked like mal was listening to silver say something profound even though all silver could do at the time was babble in toddler language with the occasional 'tar-tar' (no one knows what this is but malleus insists that silver is telling him he's hungry)
Sebek
beat the shit out of rocks with sticks
in the colder seasons, and and silver would find rocks or big ice pieces to smash on the ground
poor dude grew up confused as heck. lilia tells him lots of things, and he goes home and his parents tell him a different thing
complained about going to the dentist so much that now silver knows so much about the teeth structure of fae
his siblings love him so much, they're always doting on him and pinching his cheeks and that's why his smiles are so big and nice (real)
refused to eat anything on a fork. he hated the taste of metal
much preferred to use chopsticks. learned because he was a Big Boy now (he is one) and can help himself!!!!
unexplainable hatred for felt fabric. he used to melt all of his felt puppets in the water
him and silver dug a hole in lilia's backyard thinking they could make it to the shaftlands
they didn't make it to the shaftlands, but they dug too close to the river, so the hole filled up with water
and while silver panicked, sebek straight up burst into tears thinking the hole was going to drain the river
also burst into tears one halloween where lilia was dressed up and claimed he was the river spirit and didn't know anyone named sebek
ate a dog treat at some point but silver and malleus also joined him (not before malleus trolled sebek by saying he's going to turn into a dog now)
sebek was so distressed that he dragged malleus into it that he questioned his entire life because he loved playing with sticks. did he eat a dog treat earlier in his life???
when questioned, sebek told silver he didn't need to worry about the dog treat because he already drank milk like a puppy anyways (referencing the milk waterboarding, of course)
anyways, this incident ended in a stick-sword fight and malleus got a bonk on the head from lilia for his instigating
this is where sebek learned it btw. silver developed a thick skull because sebek is ALWAYS bonking him on the head for not knowing things he deems 'everyone should know'
taglist (let me know if you want to be added): @bigmoose1964
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noturlondonboy · 6 months ago
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Not the Time
Wenclair Oneshot
Pairing: Wednesday Addams x Enid Sinclair
Summary: Enid has a gay little moment when Wednesday ultimately succumbs to the exhaustion of being alive.
A/N: one of the first Wenclair oneshots I ever wrote! I’m in love with this show and this ship and want to write for them more. Super excited about S2! Enjoy :)❤️
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Enid Sinclair knew three essential things about her roommate.
One, don’t touch Wednesday without permission unless you wanted a knife through your throat.
Two, never insult a member of the Addams family if you wanted to have pleasant dreams.
And three, never interrupt Wednesday’s writing time with pointless questions, or you wouldn’t get another chance to go to bed in the first place.
The first one was hard for Enid and rather disheartening, but she’d take never wolfing out again over making Wednesday physically uncomfortable in a heartbeat. The second one was easy beyond reason; she had nothing bad to say about the Addams’, as they had treated her with nothing but their odd kindness and strangely comforting words. (Not to mention that Thing was practically Enid’s Right Hand Man, after Wednesday’s, of course.)
And the third- well. Enid had never been good at that. It was very clear when Wednesday was starting her writing time. The scraping of that ungodly ancient chair and shuffling of thick paper was unmistakable and unfortunately impossible to miss, especially when paired with a properly deadpan comment of “It’s my writing time now, Enid, and it would do you some good to stay quiet and get your herbology homework done.”
It was very hard to pretend Enid didn’t know it was such, and therefore have an excuse to bother Wednesday, at least once, without more than a scathing glance in retort fusing her lips shut. But she couldn’t help it, she really couldn’t! Enid was a social young wolf, and as easy as it would be to go hang out with Yoko, she had recently found herself wanting to be around Wednesday at every possible chance, even more than usual, especially when those dark eyes were so focused on the task at hand.
Enid wanted to tell Wednesday about her day, and she wanted to know if anything particularly interesting had happened to her roommate in turn. She could usually get a sentence or two out of her if she pouted enough, but most often Thing was eventually sent over to distract her.
It was an odd routine between the two of them. Jittery, anxious energy just begging to be let loose, only to be leashed by the dark force of Wednesday Addams when she was In The Zone.
Normally, Wednesday would stalk into their dorm room and get started on this exact scenario in just a minute or two after her last class or strange activity. She would nod to Enid in acknowledgement, humor her with a bit of conversation while she changed out of her uniform, and then seat herself at her desk.
But today was odd, even for Wednesday.
The week had been lethally long and so boring that Enid was sure she would die on more than one occasion, and her complaints were always met with a sharp comment from Wednesday’s silver tongue about actually taking her ADHD meds for once. Even with them in her system, the teachers had been even drier than usual the last few days, and Enid was ready to claw her hair out if something interesting didn’t happen soon.
So as soon as the door to the room opened with a quiet swish of air, the werewolf was sitting up eagerly on her colorful bed, watching Wednesday with bright eyes.
She froze immediately. Wednesday's hands were clenched tightly and her fingers twitched against her palms, her clomping footsteps uneven and louder than usual as she seethed quietly over to her closet. There was no glance at Thing, no nod to Enid, and no twitch of an intrigued smile at the new cobweb on her side of the room.
Something was wrong. Wednesday Addams was grumpy. She didn’t do grumpy. Only mildly disgruntled.
“Wednesday? Are you okay?” Enid stood carefully, squinting her eyes slightly at her dark little roommate, who was clawing (for lack of a better word) her blazer and vest off with wild abandon like the articles of clothing had personally offended her.
Wednesday gave no answer, only continued to undress and toss her clothes carelessly onto her bed, which in itself was more alarming than the lack of interest for the spiderweb. Wednesday was not a careless person, and Enid knew she hated having her things a mess. Even so, her platforms were chucked under the bed with a jerking rage to her movements as her shirt, skirt and tie joined the pile on the covers, leaving her in her black undergarments.
Enid quickly whipped back towards her side of the room, face burning as Wednesday finished changing. Now was not the time. Her Wednesday was clearly upset.
There was a heated sigh from said Wednesday, closely followed by the scrape of her chair on the floor. Enid turned back, expecting to find the girl’s braids facing her, but was surprised to meet Wednesday’s dark gaze head on.
Enid jumped slightly, startled. She didn’t dare utter a word, not when her roommate had that look on her face, like she wanted to crush the sun between her hands and make herself everyone’s problem. Like she was just daring Enid to say something.
They stared at each other silently, Enid’s shoulders tense. Cold sweat dripped down her back. She resisted the urge to tap against her leg, afraid that movement would set Wednesday off. Even Thing was staying stock still in his little hammock by Wednesday’s cello.
Or maybe he was asleep. Enid couldn’t be sure. He was a hand. It was all very strange.
Another beat, and then Wednesday sat herself down with nothing but a soft breath, her back rigid as she rolled her shoulders in an act that Enid would almost call anxious. If she didn’t have a shred of self-preservation, that is. (She doesn’t, not really.)
A quick glance to Thing confirmed that he was in fact awake, and all he gave her was a confused ‘idk’ before burrowing further into the warmth of his little bed. Enid scowled at him, signing at him that he was no help, even though he couldn’t (hear? See?) her.
The clicking of Wednesday’s old typewriter was slow and uneven. Enid watched the girl cautiously, slowly sitting back down on her bed, her hands under her legs to keep herself from picking at her nails. She watched Wednesday apprehensively, not sure what to do.
Did she dare to say something and ultimately face the price if Wednesday decided to rebuke? Or did she stay silent and try to ignore the way her roomie seemed to be wilting against her desk, her feet (which only had black and white striped socks and no boots, another oddity) no longer pressed completely to the floor, now instead tilting away from each other, like the muscles in her legs were failing to exert themselves enough to do as they should.
“I can feel your horrendously bright eyes burning unpleasant holes through my head, Enid.”
Enid startled yet again, a yelp slipping through her lips as her claws shot out. Wednesday’s voice was quiet and lacking in the solid sternness that was normally paired with her words, and yet she was still imposing from where she sat, several feet away.
“Spit it out,” Wednesday droned, her arms falling into her lap.
A moment.
“You seem tired,” was all Enid could come up with. She scolded herself.
“I am always tired, Enid. The perpetual state of existence that I am forced to be a part of is both exhausting and exhilarating. I delight in the feeling of my blood thickening and weighing my every movement down quite a bit. It provides a challenge, and forces my mind to work harder to be alert.”
Enid blinks at her, absolutely baffled, and Wednesday seems to know this, because she sighs softly out of her nose, and turns her head to see her. Her irises are deep pools of weary intelligence, so dark that Enid swears she could drown in them.
But what really catches her attention are the bruisen circles under Wednesday's eyes.
“Ok, yeah, sure, you’re always tired, existing is a lot, all that good goth stuff- when was the last time you slept, Willa?” Enid inquires boldly, her brow furrowing as she holds herself from walking over to Wednesday to smooth away the crinkle on her forehead. Wednesday would stuff a knife down her throat. Rule number one.
Wednesday’s face doesn’t shift, but she seems to emanate an intent of murder. “My sleeping patterns are not your concern, Enid.”
“It’s that stupid basilisk case you’ve been on, isn’t it?” Enid quickly bites out, suddenly feeling rather upset. “You’ve been distracting me from you being out so late to hunt a giant freaking snake with all the intolerable coddling about me taking my meds.” (The intolerable part is a lie. Enid is very a-okay with the fact that Wednesday pays enough attention to remind her to take her meds.)
“You have medicine for a reason.”
“And the human body needs sleep for a reason.”
“I’m barely human, Enid, we both know this.”
“You’re still way more human than me, Wednesday. And I can barely function most of the time!”
“Exactly, which is why you have medication.”
“Why you- that’s- that’s not the point!” Enid sputtered, ruffled.
Wednesday had that cruel little smirk on her lips that popped the barest hint of a dimple out and made Enid’s cheeks hot at the most inconvenient of times. That unbearably smug little thing…
A yawn interrupts them both and stops Enid’s quip about the change of topic in her throat. A yawn from Wednesday. Enid has a feeling Wednesday’s eyes would betray just how tired and caught off guard she is by this, if only they weren’t scrunched up as she bowed her head into her chest and covered her mouth with her hands.
The amount of devastated whiplash happening in Enid’s head is going to be giving her migraines for days. On one hand, she wants to jump up in a triumphant shout and say that she was right, Wednesday wasn’t sleeping, but on the other, she’s rather distracted by the glimpse of Wednesday’s sharper-than-expected-canines and the way her button nose is scrunching up.
(The teeth thing isn’t weird, Enid swears. She’s a werewolf. She’s allowed to notice teeth. And think they’re attractive. Of course.)
Wednesday is still curled in on herself, as if she’s hiding. If Enid didn’t know better, she’d say her headstrong and impulsive roommate was being shy. (Enid does not know better.)
Wisely refraining from making an extremely gay comment on how cute Wednesday is, Enid instead says, “You need to sleep, Wednesday. I know you think you’re immortal, but I feel like everything that happened with Crackstone and Tyler should put even you in your place about that sort of thing.” The werewolf is suddenly feeling very, very sober at the reminder that they had both almost died just a few short months ago. There’s nothing cute about that. Tiktok is a damned lie.
Wednesday doesn’t seem to have a response for that, but she does look back up to Enid, her eyes trailing to the scars on her face as the muscles behind her heavy eyes seem to loosen, the semi-permanent look of distaste falling into something soft, akin to guilt, as she, too, is reminded of the events of that night.
Enid is not used to Wednesday looking at her scars. She is not used to Wednesday’s eyes on her like that, not at all. She flushes yet again, dipping her head so that her hair falls over them.
Wednesday looks decidedly upset about that.
Refusing to address whatever the actual hell just happened, Enid simply sits up taller, balling her fists in her lap. “You need to sleep tonight, Wednesday.”
“I will.” She’s lying.
“You’re lying.”
“I am not, Enid. I would never.” Yes, she is.
“Yes, you are, and yes, you would. You just did. I know your tells, you little sycophant.”
Wednesday blinks, seemingly taken aback. Quite the oddity. Enid can barely believe it herself.
“Sleep.”
“No.” Dammit.
“I need to write, and then I have more clues to look at. I’m close to cracking this one.”
Enid stands, folding her arms over her chest and grinding her teeth. “It’s really not the time to be stubborn, Willa.”
Surprisingly, Wednesday stands too, her stance lenient as she stalks closer. “It’s what makes me so charming,” she bites out, sarcasm dripping heavily like venom from her sharp tongue.
“There are a lot of things that make you charming, but right now, stubbornness is not one of them,” Enid snaps back before she can take a moment to think over her words. She doesn’t even realize what she’s said until Wednesday pauses yet again, her eyes narrowed into quizital slits.
Hint hint, Enid’s cheeks are once again red. But she doesn’t take it back. Wednesday has been running on empty for days now, and if she has to wrestle the girl into bed and pin her down to hold her there, she will. (She tries not to think too hard about that. Once again, not the time.)
Realizing that Enid is being quite serious for once, Wednesday lets out a huff from her little nose and turns back to her desk to sit down, posture wavering immediately. “One hour. I will write for one hour, and then I will go to bed, as long as you stop talking.”
Enid frowns, knowing it’s the best she’s going to get, but she still doesn’t go back to her bed.
Wednesday is quiet and types for a moment, before shaking her head almost sincerely. “I will sleep, Enid. I promise.”
Enid beams, happy with that answer, and skips on over to jump into her blankets. She sets an alarm on her phone for one hour, and promptly scrolls through her Pinterest with a small seed of contentment in her chest.
It’s not even ten minutes later that Wednesday’s faltering typing stops completely, and Enid waits a moment before peeking up over her pillows to see what her roommate is up to. To her utter shock and complete disbelief, Wednesday is asleep, her dark head of hair slumped forward against her forearm as one hand still lays on the typewriter keys. Her back rises and falls softly, and her black hoodie seems to swallow her up.
Enid swoons.
Careful to be quiet, the werewolf gets back off her bed and steps over the wood board that once held the black tape dividing their room in two. She hasn’t been into Wednesday’s side of the room uninvited in quite a while, and she swears it’s colder and draftier the further in she gets. Typical.
Thing watches her from his hammock with a vague interest as she grabs a blanket off of Wednesday’s bed and goes to drape it over the sleeping girl. She wraps it around her softly and gently takes Wednesday’s hand off of the typewriter, tucking it under her head with the other. She’s honestly surprised that Wednesday hasn’t woken up and cursed her entire bloodline yet. She’s not too entirely opposed to the thought. It’s kind of hot, actually, if she takes a minute to think about it.
(It is, once again, still not the time.)
Wednesday’s cheek is squished against her arm, and Enid decides it’s the best thing she’s ever seen. The girl’s face is softer in sleep, the dying light through their window casting melting shapes over the lines of her jaw, the curve of her nose, the dip of her mouth. Enid cannot help but to stare, and she can’t quite find the strength to stop.
“I haven’t felt her skin on mine since our hug last semester, Thing,” she whispers carefully. “I have dreams about it sometimes, actually.” Enid lets out a tiny laugh. “How embarrassing is that?”
She doesn’t look up to see if he answers or was even listening. She just watches Wednesday, watches to make sure she really is sleeping, that she’s still breathing, that her eyes aren’t twitching behind their lids with nightmares. She doesn’t care how many times Wednesday says she enjoys them. They’re not cool.
Enid holds in a breath and places her hand over Wednesday’s, the tips of her fingers buzzing with the contact.
“She’s still so much warmer than I thought she would be.” Her voice is small and she can hear the disgusting amount of adoration that seeps from it. Wednesday would never stand for this. But Wednesday is asleep, and Enid is greedy, and wants this moment all to herself.
A moment passes, maybe two, maybe minutes, Enid isn’t sure- but she finds her head next to Wednesday’s on the desk, their breathing slow and in sync. Enid feels calm, her heart letting itself just simply be.
“You're so beautiful,” she breathes, hardly aware of how dead she would be if Wednesday woke up right then. She doesn’t quite care. All she knows is that Wednesday is sleeping, and her face has gone from cunningly sharp to peaceful, from a brewing storm to the soft rain of summer.
Enid catches herself and quickly leans back up, dizzy with something she can’t really describe. She should leave. She really should go to her side of the room. There were a few hours before her own bed time, and lots of school work to do.
But when she finally convinced herself through the haze in her head to take her hand away, a small motion and a pulse on one of her fingers kept her there. She freezes, slowly looking down.
Wednesday’s pinky is looped over Enid’s own, and as she holds her breath and makes another attempt to pull away, the hold on it only tightens. Wednesday’s brow seems to furrow. The devastating corners of her taunting mouth pull down.
Enid stops trying. Wednesday’s face melts back into a perfect mask of serenity that has Enid’s knees going weak.
“I won’t leave,” she murmurs, her heart pounding in her ears. “I’ll stay, Willa.” She ever so carefully scoots her way onto the chair with Wednesday, one leg hanging off while her friend is still blessedly seated and stable.
Wednesday makes no move to push her off or wake up- in fact, she seems to lean into Enid, melting against her shoulder. One of her braids falls out of the blanket and over Enid’s arm, and she swears she’s going to die. Again.
Enid can only look at her in awe and do her best to hold back the explosion of gay panic that’s sizzling at the base of her skull. Not the time, not the time, not the time.
She falls asleep like that, her hand interlocked with Wednesday’s, their faces inches apart, soft breaths intermingling. She knows she’ll have a cramp tomorrow. And Wednesday will likely kill her in the most brutal way. But Enid doesn’t mind, not really.
She’s just happy to be there with her.
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sokkastyles · 25 days ago
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As the eldest daughter in my family, I've always kind of related to Katara in some ways. I wasn't parentified like she was, but whenever I saw her trying to keep things together for the Gaang in the show or whenever I see her being the emotional anchor for the Gaang in a way, I could really relate to that, especially because Katara is sort of always expected to be that person for everyone and she never really gets a break from it. I'm nowhere near as incredible as Katara is, but I have experienced being the person who was always expected to be kind and forgiving, always willing to compromise and understand, and never really being allowed to be mean or angry or even make mistakes in the same ways that some of my other family members were allowed to do. I've heard my family members say things like "that's just what that person is like, that's just what their personality is like, nothing you can do about it." It still frustrates me to hear that, because it often feels like I've never been given that same margin of error. I'm not an ideal older sister or daughter by any means and I've definitely made mistakes. I'm sure there must be other girls and women who can relate to this too. And I think one of the main reasons Zutara has always been, and still is, appealing to me is because Zuko sees Katara for who she is, the good parts and the less than perfect parts, and he doesn't ever make her feel guilty about any of it. He takes her seriously, gives her a lot of care and emotional support, and is very good at meeting her where she is and trying to understand her rather than dismissing the parts of her personality that he doesn't understand or are more complicated. That's the type of emotional support I would like from a partner one day, and I wish Katara and Zuko had ended up together for that reason too.
Tbh, when people (usually KA shippers) talk about Katara getting to be a child with Aang, they talk about in based on the idea that what she needs is to be like Aang. They want her to be carefree and do cute things like penguin sled. And even though Katara enjoys doing those things, when she penguin sleds with Aang, she doesn't actually experience herself as a kid again. Her reaction is "I haven't done this since I was a kid," and Aang points out that she talks as if she isn't still a kid, because she doesn't feel like one, and going penguin sledding doesn't magically transform her. If anything, that scene emphasizes how much Katara does not consider herself a kid. Which doesn't mean she isn't one, but Katara's attitude towards penguin sledding highlights her parentification, not reverses it.
When Katara acts like a kid, she often acts in ways that get her hated by the fandom. In what scenes does Katara actually get to experience being a kid again, I ask you?
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Katara's inner child is not happy-go-lucky like Aang. Katara's inner child is selfish and full of anger and grief and fear. And validating that child is just as important as Katara getting the opportunity to play. I just find it interesting that certain people scream about letting Katara be a kid when she's doing the things that Aang wants her to do, and yet one of the episodes that show Katara the most in touch with the child she is is an episode where she gets accused of acting in a way that is not herself or too adult or too dark.
Katara avenging her mother and confronting the man who murdered her is an acknowledgement of Katara's stolen childhood and one of the most clear expressions she has of taking it back, literally reclaiming her identity. And she doesn't do it in a way that's innocent or kind or cute or wholesome or acceptably feminine, but it still comes from a need to be the child she is.
And Zuko is the one who makes that happen for her, and who doesn't tell her what the mature or proper way to do it is.
I read a quote recently from a review of the remake of Carrie that instantly made me think of Katara, and I feel like it's relevant both in the ways we talk about Katara as a heroic character and as a parentified child.
Whether she’s volunteering to take her sister’s place in the arena or grooming her son to lead the resistance; gunning down the gangsters who sell drugs to the kids in her neighborhood or swinging swords to avenge her daughter, the “strong female character” is often stirred by a maternal concern, a quintessential desire to preserve her community, to protect the weak and vulnerable. Her bad-assery must be in the service of a greater good. Even when she’s more ethically complex (like the Bride, who begrudgingly admits that all the people she killed to get to her daughter, “felt good”), she never takes a place at the table of Walter White’s grand epiphany: “I did it for me.”
- Laura Bogart, The Trouble With Carrie: Strong Female Characters and Onscreen Violence
Katara's actions in the Southern Raiders are one of the best expressions of her being a child because she does it for herself. She does it BECAUSE she is a child and she was hurt. When Katara is penguin sledding because Aang asked her to, it never approaches the point where she's doing it for herself or letting go of the idea that she isn't a kid like the others around her. It's only when she's confronting Yon Rah that she's acting not as her mother's replacement, but as the child who was left behind. The child who, like Carrie, needed the adults around her to protect her.
Of course, Katara's actions are nowhere near as extreme as Carrie's, but both stories tap into something intrinsic about girlhood and the desire for validation in a world that adultifies girls but at the same time tries to keep them infantalized.
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harmonia-university · 2 months ago
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Some history facts with Prof. Elsie!
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Hey! The name's Elsie, and I'm a history professor at Harmonia University! I specialize in human history, but I'm pretty passionate about history in general so I guess the Askblog Council came to me with all these questions from you guys, heh heh!
You probably saw me a while ago anonymously answering a few of these questions. But I think I'm brave enough now to show my face to everyone and be an official member of the Blog! I believe these questions were asked a while ago, but now I have the time to answer them so...well I guess I should address them eh?
What can you tell us about humans?
Well I think I've mentioned before, and it's probably obvious just by looking around, but they're nonexistent here! They did exist at one point, we were all living harmoniously together...until some unfortunate circumstances that led to a big war between humans and Pokemon. From then on, humans began to disappear and then just...completely vanished, without any warning.
Was it ever stated how all the humans disappeared? Is it simply an extinction event or more of a supernatural thing?
That's a pretty big topic in today's history research actually! After the war, although the Pokemon won by a landslide, there were still a good amount of humans left. Although the roles shifted a little bit, as before Pokemon were often companions to humans, almost like a pet...but now we were more independent. Living among them as civilians.
The complete disappearance is truly an enigmatic event that is a big debate among experts nowadays! Some associate it with a giant meteor shower - the biggest one seen in history that wiped out humans, as us Pokemon are quite durable. There's also been recounts of a blinding, soul crushing flashing beam of light that wiped them all out. Either way, life was becoming more unsustainable for humans as things evolved to fit Pokemon-kind more...that probably accelerated things. But from how fast it happened and the fact that the event was very poorly documented...there's more reason to believe that someTHING supernatural caused it.
What are your thoughts on humans as a whole? How do you feel about their unfortunate fate?
My family was always very close with humans. I've only heard great things about them, and all the cool stories of how my family, against all odds, won the biggest battles in international leagues and tournaments, all thanks to a trainer that knew how to make a small, weakling species like ours, very strong! I grew up with a very positive outlook on humans, and it makes me really sad that things ended the way they did. Like I said earlier, we wouldn't be here if it weren't for the humans. That's probably what led me down this path, honestly. Haha!
What's the geography of the world like? How has the geography changed since the human times?
The humans were in the midst of restructuring and renaming the regions in the world. To make them more...friendly sounding I guess. Certain areas also wanted to be their own thing...so that's where regions like Unova and Alola come from.
When the humans were wiped out, this was an unfinished project that Pokemonkind were determined to finish. Physically, the world is the same. But how everything is divided is probably different from what you're used to.
The region that Harmonia University is in - Arboria - although one of the biggest regions in the world, remained in one piece, somehow! Our downstairs neighbour got split into a few parts...Unova and Alola, as Ive mentioned, and some of the desert areas became known as the Orre region.
Another example where things are different...the Freyurr region! This was comprised of 3 different regions before - collectively known as Scandinavia. After the human extinction, this region became one with 3 distinct areas with their own language and culture.
What happened to Pokeball technology? It seems like it could be dangerous, but on the other hand it could be useful - especially for transportation! And it's low cost, low space, I'm surprised I haven't seen any evidence of the technology being converted for modern use.
Pokeballs are pretty much nonexistent nowadays, near impossible to get your hands on as a normal civilian! It was one of the biggest things that the Pokemon back then had a gripe about with the humans. Although not completely inhabitable, living in a Pokeball was very unpleasant - it's basically like being put into a very deep slumber, for who knows how long. Not much room to do anything or move around in there. Plus, many humans caught and collected tons of Pokemon with no rhyme or reason - many of them were left abandoned in Pokeballs and PC’s, never being able to see the light of day.
Other than for research and education purposes, Pokeballs have been banned all around the world ever since Pokemon civiliazation was born. We don’t even use them to capture our own ferals.
I've heard rumors that humans had experimented with themselves to turn into Pokemon before, but I'm assuming it's all just a myth. Was there ever a possibility that some of the humans ended up becoming Pokemon due to their experiments?
Pah, I'm pretty sure that was all a hoax. I'm sure humans have tried, but honestly they didn't make any breakthroughs in that front. I don't think human genetics were wired in a way that would even make that possible. They were able to kind of do it with Pokemon due to there being a particular species with properties that could allow it. But humans to Pokemon...nah that'd be a complete rewrite of everything! Or maybe...a really fun dream.
Do the Galar fossil Pokemon exist? How do fossil Pokemon work, are they revived or have they just always been around?
Yep, they do exist. But there's a bit of a catch...all of the fossil-revived species living today were revived during the human era, or are descendants of those that were. We've had to abolish a lot of those fossil revival labs, as newly found fossils would just come out as feral Pokemon with really nowhere to go. Now there are some such Pokemon in captivity, but it's strictly for ethical research purposes!
Anyways, I think that's all the questions that were left over for me! Hope that was informative. Our history isn't pretty but I think it's still really important to learn about it all. Haha! Well, if any of you still have questions, or just want to come chat with me...I'll be available!
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just-a-girl-who-wrytes · 1 year ago
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Omg I just accidently found your blog and I'm so freaking happy, cause there are not enough writer who writes for Deacon 😭 unfortunately I'm super obsessed with him, with an unhealthy amount of fic ideas in my brain xD so I give it a try and send you one of those, hopefully jot annoying you with this (or with my shitty English, it's not my first language, so I'm sorry).
Well buckle up for my request:
Reader is a new Swat member and instantly everybody loves her, with her bubbly friendly self. She's bonding great with her teammates and especially her and Deacon grow super close (they develop feelings for each other but don't want to tell the each other afraid to ruin their friendship, so their feelings stay hidden). When one day a case goes sideways and it leaves her injured (maybe a concussion or something like that) Deacon blames himself for her injury and the next days he distances himself from her, cause he thinks that it is unhealthy for him to have such deep feelings for her and him constantly worrying for her wellbeing. She notices his change of behavior and she's super sad. He starts to being unfriendly to her and being a little bit of an ass?! Even alerting the other members with his behavior. The whole situation is taking a toll on her and she is starting to effecting not only her poor heart but also her health. (so maybe she falls sick, but keep it from her teammates especially Deacon, cause she thinks that after her injury during a case he thinks of her as not capable or something like that). That is until one day she doesn't show up to work which very uncommon for her, cause she's always on time and the first one at the station. They're all worrried and Hondo tells Deacon that he has to drive to her apartment. Well he tries to refuse and send Stress but Hondo insists, so Deacon drives to her apartment. He finds her suffering from a very high fever..... So maybe with a happy ending like Deacon regrets his shitty behavior, she instantly cries when she recognizes him in her feverish state, asking him why he hates her suddenly, which is now breaking his heart. He cares for her and nurses her back to health, or at first tries to bring her fever down. Later he confesses why he was an asshole.
Soooorry it's so long. There's so pressure for you to write this. Maybe you just want to use some ideas? Well I would be so happy.
Please take care lovely
Here you go, hope you enjoy!
“Nice!” Luca exclaimed as the team watched you send rounds down range from your firearm.
With the increase in officer related shootings, LAPD had decided to provide each team a SWAT medic and you were the newest member of 20 squad. 
“Who knew girls can shoot?” You heard Deacon asked. You turned to playfully scowl at him and noticed him wink at you. 
“Better watch it, Kay, or I’ll show you just how good I really am.” 
You had been a part of the team for just over two months and they were the best guys you had ever worked with in your career. You truly became a part of their family – you had their backs and they had yours. There was one that was different though. 
David Kay. 
You had noticed him watching you on more than one occasion, stealing winks from you, sharing small, flirtatious smiles. You weren’t sure if your attraction to him was mutual or not, but if you had to guess, you would say yes. However, you didn’t want to complicate anything by dating one of your teammates and you didn’t want to ruin the friendship you had developed with Deacon. You assumed Deacon adopted the same mindset because he never brought it up either. 
However, that didn’t mean your flirting with each other fell on blind eyes. 
The entire team noticed it and often gave you both shit over it. 
You both were in the middle of denying another teasing round of friends with benefits accusations from your teammates when you were dispatched to a school shooting. 
The mood immediately sobered up as all of you put on your gear and grabbed your bags and firearms. The ride to the school in Black Betty was quiet minus updates from Hondo. 
“Stay liquid, guys,” He told the team as you pulled up on scene. 
There were multiple reports of injured children inside of the school. 
This call was all yours. 
It was going to be your job to go inside and assess each injured child to see how critically injured they were. It was your team’s job to protect you while you did that. You were going in without any knowledge of where the shooter was, but you knew if you had children, you would want someone to go in and save your baby. You swallowed your fear and prepared to do your job. 
You got out of the armored truck and took your spot in the middle of your team. You slowed your breathing down to get your heart rate under control and keep your emotions in check. 
Deacon made sure that he stayed close to you as you entered the school. He knew his teammates would have your back too, but he felt… differently about you. He cared about you a lot. He had quickly fallen for your smile and your personality. You didn’t let the team’s banter intimidate you one bit from the start. You were quick and witty with your playfulness with them. You were smart as hell when it came to medicine and you had proven to be a solid member of the SWAT team in training exercises and on calls you had run together. He wanted so badly to ask you out to dinner, but he wasn’t willing to change the dynamic of the team by adding a relationship to the mix. However, that didn’t mean he couldn’t be protective over you – whether you noticed it or not. 
That was why Deacon had taken it so personally when you were knelt down, applying a tourniquet to a fourth-grade student’s leg and got shot by the hidden gunman. His team covered him while he immediately turned to you to make sure you were okay. The round had struck your vest, but you knew it had broken ribs. The pain you felt in your side was unmistakable. Regardless, you threw your body over the child’s to protect her from the gunfire that ensued. Deacon and Luca dragged you both behind a desk behind a wall in a classroom. 
“Are you okay?” Deacon asked without taking his aim from the door way. 
“We’ve got to get her out of here.” You ignored his question as you continued to try and stop the little girl’s bleeding. 
Your voice was forced and you were breathy. 
“I asked if you were okay,” Deacon said angrily. 
“I’m fine.” You retorted. 
You soon heard Tan’s voice over the radio that the shooter had been neutralized. You didn’t know if there was more than one shooter, but didn’t see any signs of one so far. When you got the clear from Hondo, you radioed for another team to come in and get the girl out and get her to a hospital. Once she was safely removed, you resumed your formation in the middle of the team to continue to clear the school building. Deacon could tell you were injured because you didn’t shoulder your firearm correctly, but he didn’t see any blood so he let it go. He was pissed off at you for not stopping and going to get help yourself, but he was even more pissed off at himself for not seeing the gunman before he shot at you. 
It took two hours to clear the rest of the school and stabilize the remaining children. By the time you were done, you were visibly diaphoretic and short of breath. You could hardly manage three words without stopping to catch your breath. 
“20-David to command,” Deacon radioed, “We need an EMS unit to our location, we have a team member who needs to be checked out.” 
You were in pain, you couldn’t breathe, and you were pissed off that Deacon asked for EMS without consulting you first. 
“Why did you do that?!” You managed to asked through clenched teeth. “These children need those paramedics.” You took a few shallow breaths, “Not me! Cancel. Them.” 
If looks could kill, your sergeant would be the one who needed a medic unit, not you.
“Officer,” Deacon said sternly, “You look like hell and you cannot breathe.”
You started to open your mouth to cut him off, but he started speaking loudly again.
“Now, I suggest you shut up and listen to your sergeant. I am not the one who takes orders from you.” 
His harsh words hit you harder than the bullet hit your ballistic vest and left you just as speechless. David had never been so disrespectful to you. If the paramedics hadn’t arrived to assess you, you would have turned in your badge right there. You knew the rest of the team had noticed as well because they were all silent which pissed you off even more. Where was your support?
The paramedics tried helping you onto the stretcher, but you refused it. Despite not being able to speak for being short of breath. You held onto the stretcher for support and walked to the ambulance. By the time you finally made it outside to the ambulance, you were physically unable to get into the ambulance because you were hurting so bad and so short of breath. The EMS providers finally convinced you to get onto the stretcher and they were able to load you into the truck. 
When you arrived to the ER, you were taken to a trauma room due to the fact that you had technically been shot. Your chest x-ray revealed a collapsed lung due to the broken ribs. 
The rest of the team finished debriefing before being cleared to leave for the day. Hondo met Deacon in the quiet locker rooms since most of everyone else had already left. 
“Deac…” Hondo paused, knowing he needed to tread carefully, “What was up back at the school? I have never heard you speak to anyone like that – especially one of our teammates.” 
Deacon slammed his locker shut. 
“Hondo, now ain’t the time, brother.”
The lieutenant raised his hands in surrender. “Okay, I won’t press, but I do ask that you consider an apology. It was unwarranted today. We all performed immaculately given the circumstances.”
“No, Hondo. No. We did not all perform immaculately.” His tone was biting. 
Deacon walked passed Hondo and left the locker rooms. He left the station and threw his duffel bag in the backseat of his truck. He climbed in, started it, and drove to a nearby lake that off the road and would likely be deserted after dark on a week night. He parked in the dark and slammed his fists against the steering wheel in frustration. 
Tears filled his eyes as he mentally kicked himself in the ass for missing the shooter that injured you today. He didn’t fight the tears as they spilled down his cheeks. What had gotten into him? Why were you different? Why was he so upset? Why did you getting injured bother him so badly? You were okay and you were expected to make a full recovery according to Hicks. Where along the line had he developed feelings and why was he so afraid of talking to you about them?
You spent 6 days in the hospital, 4 of those with a chest tube before being discharged home. During your entire hospital stay, Deacon had not been by to see you once despite daily visits from the rest of your teammates. It made you mad, but most of all, it hurt your feelings. You really liked you sergeant – or you thought that you did. His actions since you had been injured spoke louder than any words that could have been said. 
Luca and Chris were there to take you home and help you get settled. They carried your bags in and Chris helped you unpack your things while Luca cooked supper for the three of you. Chris helped you remove your bra so you could put on a loose, comfy t-shirt. Being the only females on the squad left you two comfortable around each other. 
“That is one hell of a bruise, babe.” She said as she looked at your black and purple side. 
You had to agree – the entire left side of your torso was bruised. It looked awful. Thankfully, the doctors had been able to help manage your pain with narcotics. 
“I’m glad it finally looks worse than it feels… Which is saying a lot because it still hurts like hell.” 
You slipped on a pair of sleep shorts and made your way back into your kitchen with Chris. 
You took a pain pill and joined your teammates in your living room to eat the spaghetti that Luca made. 
“Thank you so much for taking care of me guys,” You said several hours later as you walked Luca and Chris to your door. 
“That’s what we’re here for, love,” Luca said, pulling you into a gentle hug. 
You kissed his cheek, “Supper was delicious, Dom. Thank you times a million.” 
He returned the kiss to your cheek and Chris pulled you in for a hug. 
“Call us if you need anything?” 
You smiled at her after the hug, “You know I will.” 
You settled onto your couch with a glass of wine. You knew the alcohol and narcotic wasn’t the smartest elixir, however, you needed to mask more than your physical pain. 
You couldn’t get Deacon off your mind and your heart had yet to stop hurting. Your emotional pain screamed much louder than your physical pain. 
“Dammit!” You heard through clouded consciousness. “What the fuck?” 
You felt yourself being picked up and carried to your bed. You recognized a familiar cologne but quickly disregarded the scent and winced at the pain in your ribs before drifting back off to sleep. 
You woke up the next morning nearly in tears again as you entered a coughing spell. You managed to get out of bed and make your way to the kitchen where your pain pills were, but you were scared shitless by a man sitting at your kitchen table. As soon as your heart began racing with fear, the fear subsided, realizing that it was Deacon sitting inside of your home. 
“Jesus Christ! What the fuck, David?” You held your chest with one hand and braced your broken ribs with the other. 
He didn’t answer you. 
You ignored his silence and took your morning pain medication. 
“Ya know… I said the same thing last night when I came over and found you unconscious on your couch. So, I can also say, what the fuck? What were you thinking?” Deacon’s voice grew steadily louder as he stood up and turned to you. “Pain pills and alcohol?”
You were angry. “Something to make this shit stop hurting,” You spat as you snatched up the side of your shirt to reveal your black and blue torso. 
You could tell the extent of your injuries caught Deacon off guard. His facial expression softened and he didn’t respond. 
You let go of your shirt, letting it fall back down to your waist and continued fixing yourself a glass of water to take your pain pill with. You took your medicine and continued to ignore your sergeant as you turned your back to him to get the milk out of your refrigerator to fix yourself a bowl of cereal. His hand stopped yours mid-air reaching for your cabinet. He gently held your wrist with one hand and you felt the edge of your shirt being lifted again. He let go of your hand, staring at the bruising that covered you. You could sense his demeanor soften. 
There was a long silence as he took in your injuries. 
“I’m so sorry…” He whispered. 
The tone in his voice felt like a hug to your soul. 
“Deacon-” You turned around to face him. 
“No, listen to me,” he interrupted you. “This…” He grazed his fingertip down your side, “is all my fault.”
The confusion was written all over your face. 
“I should have seen that bastard before he ever had a chance at you.” 
You began shaking your head but you weren’t quite sure what to say. 
“You’ve been an asshole to me ever since it happened, David, what the hell has changed now?” You were beginning to grow angry again. 
“Look, I am so, so sorry.” His voice was gentle. “I should have stopped that guy before he shot you. I shouldn’t have snapped at you like I did. I should have visited you in the hospital. You are a teammate and I failed you, but I really should have told you from the get-go that I have developed feelings for you.” He didn’t take a breath the entire time he spoke so you struggled to follow him, but his last sentence hit you like a ton of bricks. 
“Excuse me?” 
“Ever since you have been on the team with us, you have become more than just a teammate to me. Truthfully, I have liked you from the day that I met you and my attraction to you has only grown every single day. I like you so much more than just as a teammate. I would dare say that I am falling in love with you.” He slowly reached up to cradle your face with his hand, hesitant, wondering if you would allow him to touch you. 
You did. 
“I am so, so sorry that I have treated you so poorly this week – so wrong. It had nothing to do with you and everything to do with the fact that I hate myself for not being able to protect you like I should have. I’ve been so afraid to let you know how I feel about you. I’m sorry I was more afraid of affecting the team than I was giving you the honesty that you deserve. Please, please forgive me.” 
He looked into your eyes as he nervously chewed on his bottom lip. 
“Deacon…” You said quietly, leaning into his hand caressing your jaw. 
He took a deep breath and continued, “If you don’t feel the same way, I understand, but I came over here last night to apologize and tell you all of this. When I found you passed out on the couch, barely responsive, it frustrated me. So, I stayed here last night to make sure you were okay. Please don’t be mad.” 
Silence fell between you while you considered how to respond. Given the emotions that you had worked through over the past week, going from feelings for your partner, to physical and emotional hurt, to anger towards David for not visiting, texting or calling, resentment towards yourself for having feelings towards David despite how cruel he had been to you with his absence while you had been hospitalized, you struggled to find any words.
Deacon watched you suffer through a week’s worth of feelings as he watched your eyes. You took a deep breath. 
He decided that you were taken too long to respond and if he didn’t act now, he never would. 
He leaned down and softly pressed his lips on yours. 
You instinctively closed your eyes and allowed David to kiss you. When you didn’t pull away, he parted his lips just enough to run his tongue tenderly along your bottom lip. You opened your lips, allowing him to kiss you deeper. You began to return the kiss when David went to place his hands on your waist, forgetting about your injuries. You stopped kissing him and winced. 
“God, I’m so sorry,” he said.
“It’s okay.” You whispered, your voice shaky. 
Deacon noticed the tears that trickled down your cheeks. 
He wiped them away with his thumbs and began apologizing to you again. 
You interrupted him with another kiss. You reached up and intertwined your fingers behind his head, softly rubbing his neck with your fingertips. He moaned quietly into the kiss. He grabbed your arm and squeezed it, needing to touch you, but being mindful of your injuries. You enjoyed the feeling of his tall, muscular body, towering over yours. You felt protected. 
“Deacon?” 
He pressed his forehead to yours, brushing a stand of hair behind your ear, “Mmhmm?”
“I love you.” 
"I love you too."
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macabrecabra · 4 months ago
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Now can't have the Silph Bros having a gang without the prominent members of it! Introducing the Nightshade Mafia members under the direct command of Ghast, formerly Hauts' underlings.
Exception is Hund. Hund is only ever with Gen 100% because he's the 100% competent good boy.
Read more for more info and some design notes on each!
Hund VonDoom (Hounddoom)
The ever loyal butler, bodyguard, and all around the one person Gen tells everything to, Hund is often regarded as a member of the family for how he is always with Gen. He is a silent sort, never speaks unless spoken to and follows orders faithfully without question. Probably the only person Gen trusts without a second thought.
The question most have is if Gen and Hund are actually a couple or not which is hard to say as Gen says nothing about it and Hund is a quiet judgmental look to all. However, it can't be understated that no one probably knows Gen best than Hund.
Design Notes: I just imagined this bodyguard of Gen who hides the lower half of their face in their collar, giving them a kind of stern and mysterious look as a minion. Hounddoom because they are good boys and Hund would def have that guard dog vibe!
Kofco & Whezle Smogbur (Wheezing)
With the strange evolution of pokemon without humans about, the Wheezing evolution has taken a turn! Usually the two parts of Wheezing are surgically removed, leaving the two as close brothers. Such an ascension is seen highly in the Koffing community, thus Kofco and Whezle command some level of respect among their fellows.
The two have a rough and tough street-wise attitude and like to think they are the big pokemon on the block, more than willing to get into a scrap and show people who get in the way of the mafia who's boss.... until things get sticky, then they are both looking for the door in a blast of gas attack.
Design Notes: When I started to design their outfits, I kept thinking of Jasper and Horace from 101 Dalmations and the style of clothing they wore and it just really stuck in my head! The tiny hats on their heads was just the icing on the cake <3
Arbel Jessic (Arbok)
Arbel is a classy snake who is in the criminal business to satisfy her lavish spending habits and get access to all the best fashion at a discount. She is not above getting her hands dirty or taking charge of her dumb co-workers is need be. Can be the voice of reason at times in the group, tampering down the chaotic leanings that can happen. She is looking for love and loves to date in her free time, looking for the one.
She can be a bit vain though and when someone makes a comment about her looks she doesn't like, she will be quick to anger and to lash out. She gets along best with Victor in the group, mostly because Victor doesn't know what she is saying half the time... Design Notes: I was channeling Jessie from Team Rocket when making Arbel, just wanting a strong lady in the gang and just really brought the design together in the end <3 the patterns she has is different than official Arbok art as I feel each Arbok has its own special markings!
Victor Belkavitch (Victreebel)
An immigrant from another region, Victor came to Kanto for a new start in life and to take care of his very large extended family of cousins, nephews, grandparents, aunts, and uncles that followed after him. He fell in with the Nightshade Mafia for his impressive work in a bar shootout and has been with them ever since as the pay is good and he does not have to talk much. He is still learning the local language of Kanto and struggles at times with things.
He is the largest one in the gang and can brute strength a lot of things. Loyal to his co-workers whom he treats as family, he is a dependable sort and not above sticking a fight out to keep others safe. Also he is of a pokemon kind that is not above swallowing things whole, including other pokemon when ordered.
Design Notes: As soon as he was named Victor, his design of leather jacket and dark jeans was set in stone as a nod to the dress of gangs/mafias that are found in Eastern Europe. A hat didn't really fit as he had that leaf to be his hat. I just like Victreebels....
Wolbert Buffet (Wobbuffet)
They have been the mafia since it was form as a best friend of Hauts. They actually have the other half of Hauts' hat so between them is the whole hat which means a lot to both of them. Wolbert can come across as rather energetic and a bit absentminded about things, more emotional than most, but more than willing to take the brunt of an attack without hesitation. They took news of Hauts' death hard but remained in the gang to keep an eye on Ghast and make sure he doesn't get into trouble.
They really want to help Ghast in leading the mafia, but they themselves aren't really good at leadership things as motivating people is hard. They just yell loudly and act like they have an idea of what they are doing most of the time. They really shine when it comes to being in a fight or having to get through doors with their sticky fingers.
Design Notes: Wolbert was, by far, the hardest one to design of the gang. Wobbuffet has a simple design that I had to translate into a more anthropomorphic style. Also it felt better with their body type that they probably favor dresses or skirts, so they got a blend of a suit and skirt! Also no shoes, but nice socks!
Gilliad Gligland (Gligar)
Gilliad is the new face on the block and the only one of the mafia who never knew Hauts. Ghast has adopted them as their best friend as a result, teaching them how to be a real ganster! Gilliad is a tad gullible as a result, believing everything they are told. still green about the gills, they get really scared by being in situations and stumble a lot. He's still learning!
Design Note: Given that Gligar has the webbing for gliding, it felt important that their outfit gave them access to their ability naturally and that clothing was designed around them. It is something I'm keeping in mind with designs to take in the pokemon's anatomy when humanizing them! Also having a goofy friend for Ghast was key, so they share similar fashion and being goofy little boys!
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tbyfandoms · 20 days ago
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Birthday Blues | Austin Butler x Reader
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Pairing: austin butler x f!reader
Word Count: 3.9k
Summary: noticing her struggle with the loss and memory of her brother on his birthday, austin helps and comforts y/n with the celebration of his special day (requested)
Warnings: mentions of deceased siblings, descriptions of grief
Masterlist/Request Form | Ask/Tell/Request
A/N: it’s been so long since I’ve updated and I’m so sorry for that. I’ve missed writing so much and hope this is me getting back into my groove. I started this request ages ago but just now finished it. it’s felt so weird rounding out this fic about grief after hearing the news about liam (for any of my fellow directioners) and it’s just crazy to me how so many of the feelings and instances I wrote about in this fic have been a reality lately. I hope you’re all doing well whether you’ve been affected or not, and please remember to keep those you love close and to let them know how much you love them. to the anon who requested this, I hope this fic brings you comfort, thank you so much for requesting <3
Today’s the day. The day you’ve been anxiously awaiting for a while now. Every year it’s the same, it never seems to get easier for you no matter how hard you wish it would.
It’s your brother’s birthday, and it’s been a while since you’ve gotten to celebrate with him in person. He passed away and every year on his birthday you find yourself unable to function properly. Everyone tells you it gets better with time, but you’re still waiting for that to start kicking in.
There are some days where you find yourself so overcome with grief you can’t even find the right words to describe it, and there are other days where for a little while you almost forget he’s not here anymore. You yearn for those days, those days that feel like you’re floating and there’s nothing but calmness surrounding you.
You wish his birthday was one of those tranquil days.
As you move mechanically around the kitchen, doing your normal tasks as you would any other day, you find yourself trying not to fall apart.
Grief is a really funny thing. At times you believe your mourning period has passed and that that part of you that’s now missing has been patched and you’ll be able to handle this day on your own without any consolation. Other times you don’t even know how you’re able to stand up on your own and be expected to continue on. It’s like a balancing act, never knowing which way the scale is going to tip. Calm or devastated. Good or bad.
Pouring yourself something to drink, you think back on all the happy memories with your brother that you can. You know in your heart he wouldn’t want you to be sad today, or any day really. It’s just incredibly hard to not notice his absence, especially on his special day. It’s hard when you miss him so much and want nothing more than to celebrate with him instead of without.
Over the past few days you’ve tried not to focus too much on your brother’s birthday. You’ve kept busy and continued business as usual but you can’t deny the moments of sadness that crept in unannounced. You’ve talked to other family members about it and some of your friends too, a lot of them knowing what this day means to you and how hard it can be. You always keep up a brave face but it’s easier said than done on some days compared to others.
The sound of padded footsteps coming from your right breaks you out of your thoughts. When you turn your head you’re met with the soft smile on your boyfriend’s face. It’s impossible not to reciprocate it. You don’t know a soul on this Earth that’s ever been able to withstand a smile from Austin Butler.
“Hi, baby,” he says as he wraps his arms around you, his warmth and familiar scent immediately settling over you. Your body instantly relaxes against him, comfort beginning to course through your veins.
“Hi, Aus.” It comes out almost like a whisper and you curse yourself for already showing a sign of weakness. You promised yourself last night that you’d try to get through this day on your own, not wanting to distract Austin from any of his work or typical routine. Alas it’s not turning out how you hoped. That’s the thing about grief though, no matter how hard you try, you never do know when it’s going to come creeping back in.
Busying yourself with cleaning up, you ease yourself out of Austin’s grasp. For some reason you feel that if you stay that close to him, it won’t be long before your walls start crumbling down and you’ll both end up wrapped in devastation.
To be fair, you don’t even know if your boyfriend realizes what today is. You know you’ve mentioned it in passing, but with not wanting to make a big deal out of it you never really went into detail. You’ve talked to Austin about your brother before whether it be reminiscing about childhood memories or recalling an inside joke, but you always try to keep that devastation at bay.
The blonde hasn’t said anything about it recently and with his hectic schedule lately, you’re sure it hasn’t even crossed his mind. You’re not hurt by it, if anything you understand and appreciate it. It’s probably best if you handle today alone, in your own way.
A small frown adorns the corner of your lips and you make sure to turn your head so Austin doesn’t notice it. One thing about him is that he’s always able to pick up on your emotions and can tell when something’s wrong. Best plan of action is to just proceed as you normally would. You’re sure the actor has a million and one things to do today, so he should be out the door any minute now and you’ll be able to tackle the day however your head and heart deem fit.
“Are you hungry?” You say as chipper as you can while you start to open up a cabinet, ready to whip up anything your boyfriend would like. “I can make you your favorite or if you have to leave soon I can just make you something to take on the go.”
“No, I’m okay, thank you. I-I’m not working today.” You nearly bash your head into the cabinet door as you hear this. Your boyfriend was practically always working, especially now. So him saying this totally takes you by surprise.
“Why not?” You turn around and face Austin and just based off the look on his face you can tell he remembers what day it is. His eyes are so sincere and you nearly burst into tears because he hasn’t even said anything and yet you know exactly why he isn’t working. Why he most definitely told his manager and whoever else that today specifically was off limits for any meetings or shoots.
“I took the day off. I know I haven’t brought it up lately and you probably thought I forgot, but I know what today is, what it means and how important it is to you. I just wanted to be here with you and to let you know if you need me that I’ll be right here. I won’t let you deal with today on your own, sweetheart.” His tone is soft and he reaches out to caress your cheeks, wiping a tear you hadn’t even realized slipped out in the process.
“Austin I-,” you gulp, emotion rising fast in your throat as you look into his blue eyes and feel the empathy radiating off of him. “You didn’t have to do that. I know how busy you are and I know it must’ve taken a lot to have your day cleared. Really, it’s fine if you want to go to work. I-I can handle it, I’m fine-“
Your voice cracks and in that same moment you feel like part of your heart does as well.
Austin’s hands are tangled in your hair in an instant as he pulls you in close, holding your head against his shoulder as you begin to fall apart in his arms. There it is, one of those grief stricken moments you swore you wouldn’t allow to take over you today. So much for holding it together.
Clearly your boyfriend doesn’t seem to mind though, and for that you’ll be eternally grateful. You let yourself go, let your emotions go, as he whispers affirmations in your ear. Softly shushing you and assuring you that it’s ok to let it all out. It’s almost scary how easy it is for you to do this as well. To let yourself be vulnerable like this. But honestly? You wouldn’t have it any other way. If you’re going to fall apart in anyone’s arms, there’s no one better than Austin’s to do it in.
After a while of being wrapped up in the blonde’s arms and after your sobs begin to turn into soft hiccups, you feel collected enough to take a small step back and start to wipe away any remaining tears.
“I’m sorry, Aus,” you whisper, feeling a little bad for just falling apart like this. You know he doesn’t mind, he wouldn’t have taken the day off if he did, but even still.
“Hey, hey, hey, do not apologize. You have nothing to be sorry for.” Austin reaches out and swipes his thumbs underneath your eyes, collecting tears that haven’t yet fallen. “I’m here for you, and if that means being a human tissue for the day then I’m fine with that.”
A small laugh bubbles out of your throat and the sound makes Austin smile. He loves your laugh and he’d do anything to hear it, especially on a day like this.
“I hope you know how much I appreciate you. I know you’re no stranger to grief when losing a loved one, but I still appreciate you taking this in stride and just being there for me. This day it’s-it’s-,” your breath catches in your throat, but you clear it, not wanting your emotions to take over again. “It’s hard, but you certainly make it a lot less difficult to deal with and for that I’m grateful.”
“Of course, baby. I’m here for you, always. When you lose someone you love, it’s difficult enough to deal with, yet alone trying to deal with it on your own. I promise you I’ll always be here for you on this day and every other one you may need me for as long as you’ll have me.”
A small smile breaks out on your lips and you don’t know a better response than wrapping your arms around Austin and squeezing him with all the love and appreciation you can muster. You can’t even imagine a day without him. You’ll have him forever if you’re able to.
Once the two of you break apart you watch as Austin begins to say something, but then appears to hesitate. His eyes meet yours and you start to wonder what it is he wants to say to you.
“Now I don’t ever want to do anything that would make you uncomfortable, but over the past couple days I’ve been thinking about what we could do to celebrate your brother today. If you’re okay with it, I’d like to take you somewhere.” The blonde takes a breath and then reaches for your hand, squeezing once before continuing. “You trust me, right?”
You’ve never felt more sure of anything than you do right now in this moment when you say, “Yes, with my whole heart.”
Your boyfriend smiles and you feel your stomach flutter with both gratitude and anticipation for what he has planned. No matter where it is he ends up taking you, you know with one hundred percent certainty that he’s doing it because he loves you and cares for you in a way you never even thought possible. That fact alone is what carries you out of that kitchen and through the front door.
*****
When Austin pulls the car into the parking lot of the flower shop connected to the cemetery your brother is buried in, you feel your heart begin to swell.
On the drive over, you began to brainstorm ideas of where it is your boyfriend was taking you. There was a small part of you that hoped he wasn’t driving you to some restaurant or your family’s house to try and take your mind off today, but that he was taking you right to this very place. In your mind, there’s no better way to celebrate and remember your brother than celebrating with him as much as you’re physically able to.
Not a lot of people find comfort in visiting a grave in a cemetery, but it’s one of the only ways you’re able to feel some sort of closeness to your brother. He might not be visible to you, but there’s something about sitting there and just talking out loud to him that allows you to feel some semblance of peace.
“Now I know everyone feels differently when it comes to visiting graves and doing stuff like this. So if you’re at all uncomfortable being here, you just let me know and I’ll turn this car around, we’ll go right back home, and I’ll apologize for the rest of my life for ever crossing any boundaries with you.”
A breathy laughs escapes you and you shake your head as you reach out and hold Austin’s hand in yours. “No, this is perfect. I very much appreciate you even thinking of doing this. I haven’t been able to come out here in a while, especially not alone, so I’m grateful you brought me here and that you’re willing to be by my side during it.”
“You’re welcome, sweetheart,” he smiles.
Austin turns off the car and the two of you make your way inside, the smell of fresh flowers instantly hitting your nose and you breath in deeply, wanting to hold onto it. It’s crazy to think there could be something so beautiful and alive surrounded by a place so sorrowful and morbid. Somehow, you think there’s something poetic to be found in that.
Both you and Austin wander around the shop for a while, taking in all the gorgeous arrangements decorated specifically for different types of family members. You see plaques for parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles, and then finally siblings. It hurts your heart to know people lose their loved ones in a blink of an eye every day. No one is safe from the horrors and unfairness of the world, but you wish with everything you’ve got that they were.
You wish nearly every day that your brother had been.
As you walk further down the aisle, you find yourself getting stopped by a bouquet. It stands out from the others, it’s almost as if the colors and arrangement of it were calling out to you. One look at it and you know instantly it’s the one you’d like to get for your brother.
“Aus, this one’s perfect,” you say softly, stopping your boyfriend in his tracks. He looks over at it and smiles fondly. He thinks it’s perfect almost as much as you do.
Austin instantly grabs it and the two of you walk over to the checkout counter. You reach into your purse so you can grab your wallet, but the actor holds his hand out and shakes his head. “Let me, for his birthday.”
Tears immediately spring to your eyes at the sentiment and all you’re able to do in response is nod your head slightly and give Austin a wobbly smile. You don’t know why you’re so surprised over all of this. This is who Austin is, it’s who he always has been, and it’s who he always will be.
*****
The gravel road that winds every which way through the cemetery causes the car to shake just slightly as Austin follows your instructions to get to your brother’s grave. You’re not entirely convinced that’s the sole reason your stomach starts to knot though.
Even though it’s been a while since you’ve visited this place, the moment Austin pulled up to the gates it was like you were here just yesterday. The landmarks are all too familiar, the shapes of other people’s headstones, and the view of other grieving families scattered around bring everything back instantly.
As you look around and tell Austin to pull over to the right up ahead, you start to feel a little lightheaded. In your mind you can see the day you buried your brother so vividly. You can hear the sniffles of family and friends and feel the slight breeze in the air as he was lowered into the ground.
Even though you appreciate being able to still somewhat spend time with your brother here, it does make it all seem so much more real. When you don’t come and visit, sometimes you’re able to pretend that he’s still here, still alive. But the minute you see that headstone, you’re reminded that he’s not, and it gets harder to shake the sadness.
Austin puts the car in park and you both sit in silence for a moment. He watches you look out the window, knowing all too well the emotions running through you right now. He gives you a minute more before speaking up.
“Do you want me to wait in the car or is it okay to come with you?” His deep voice breaks you out of your thoughts and you blink several times before looking over at him.
“No, come with me, please? I-I want you there.” Austin nods his head and exits the car, coming over to the passenger side and helping you out of the car as you hold onto your brother’s bouquet.
Grass crunches under your shoes as you walk the few feet to your brother’s grave, and a soft gasp passes through your lips as you come face to face with the headstone that’s seared itself into your mind forever.
Kneeling down, you brush off the small bits of leaves and grass that’ve taken residence on the light gray stone. Your fingers trace over the letters imprinted within it and with each passing letter you feel your heart squeeze inside your chest.
It’s so unfair how life can change so drastically in an instant. You remember the last conversation you had with your brother and you wish you would’ve known that would be the last time you spoke to him. You would’ve said more, would’ve memorized more about his voice and the way he laughed. You would’ve held on to anything and everything you could if it meant keeping even one more tiny thing of him close to you.
Lifting up the bouquet in front of you, you make sure everything in it looks perfect before placing it by the headstone and then standing back up by your boyfriend. The flowers look beautiful and you hate that you can’t physically give them to your brother on his special day. You just hope he’s somewhere looking down at you and seeing how loved he still is. How he’ll always be celebrated.
Suddenly, you feel Austin softly place his hand on your lower back and begin to rub circles on it. This is something he often does when he can tell you’re sad or getting overwhelmed and just need some sort of comfort. It always helps calm you down and you appreciate Austin doing it in this moment.
Austin truly cares so much for you and it blows your mind every single day how lucky you are to have someone like him in your life. Everything from the grand gestures to the smallest little things he does for you, you find yourself being so grateful for it all. He’s such a wonderful guy and you smile thinking about how well he would’ve gotten along with your brother.
You know instantly your brother would’ve adored him. He’d definitely try to play the protective brother card and give off the impression he’d never approve, but in your heart you know Austin would’ve had him wrapped around his finger, much like how he has you. You could see them hanging out and watching sports together, talking about music and films, and overall finding such a genuine friendship within each other.
The thought brings a smile to your face and you let out a small laugh thinking about all the chaos they’d get up to together.
Austin notices and his own curious smile adorns his lips as he wonders what you could possibly be thinking about. “What’s goin’ on in that pretty little head of yours?”
“I know you never got to meet him,” you start, a small tear trailing down your cheek as you take your eyes off the headstone in front of you and look towards your boyfriend. “But he’d really like you.”
A small puff of air leaves Austin as he takes in your words. In an instant he has you wrapped in his arms and his lips pressed against your forehead. “Oh, baby. I wish with all my heart I could’ve met him.”
You nod your head silently against him, knowing with everything you’ve got that he genuinely means it.
“Thank you for bringing me here, Aus,” you whisper, your words a soft rumble against the blonde’s chest. “You have no idea how much this means to me. I appreciate it so much.”
“You don’t have to thank me, but you’re welcome. I’d do practically anything for you—especially this—and especially today.”
You know Austin’s unfortunately no stranger to grief. He knows the pain of losing a loved one just as much as you do and you think it’s so kind of him to do all of this with you when you know it probably puts him back in his own memories of loss. The thought alone makes you squeeze him a little harder and plant a soft kiss on his cheek. “I love you, Austin.”
“I love you too,” he smiles. “Y’know if you wanna do this every year for your brother’s birthday, we definitely can. If you want to, that is. I know it’ll never change the fact he’s no longer with us, but maybe celebrating him like this and coming to leave some flowers at his grave every year can help you feel a little bit closer to him in a way.”
“Yeah, I’d really love that. I think he would too.” You smile up at your boyfriend and take in his thoughtful proposition. You’d love to come visit your brother’s grave like this for his birthday every year. Like Austin said, it’ll never change the fact he’s not here with you anymore, but at least it gives you something to hold onto. It gives you something to keep your brother just a little bit closer to you, and you’d do anything to make that happen.
“It’s a deal then,” Austin says before leaning down and kissing you on the forehead. After pulling away he crouches down and plants himself on the grass. “C’mon, no more birthday blues. Let’s sit for a while. I’d love for you to tell me more about your brother.”
Your heart soars at his interest. Most people would want to flee this situation. Get as far away from a place like this and ignore the fact someone’s passed on completely. Not Austin. He faces it head first. He knows it’s hard, but he also knows it can be healing to do and it can mean a lot to someone too. He can tell by the look on your face he’s made the right call, and he’s grateful he’s able to be here for you in whatever way you need him.
“Well, where do I begin?” You wonder as you sit down next to the blonde. You rack your brain and try to decide on what story or fun fact you should share first. God knows you have an endless supply of them tucked away in your memory. Some funny, some sad, and some downright disturbing in the best way possible.
You glance over at Austin, settling on one and as you go to start sharing one of your favorite memories of your brother, you watch as your boyfriend completely tunes in to whatever it is you’re about to say. Nothing else seems to matter in this moment to him and that alone makes you want to wrap your arms around him and never let go.
Yeah, you think in your head, in a way speaking to your brother. You definitely would’ve liked him.
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siolixz · 1 month ago
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~ Veils of Crimson ~
Chapter 2
Pairings: oz cobb x reader (Carmine Falcone's daughter)
<chapter1> <chapter3> <chapter4> <chapter 5: part 1>
Reader is the daughter of Carmine Falcone and upon her late father's demise, she is obligated to return home after 5 years to face her past. I edited some things, like Sofia being in Arkham only 5 years instead of 10. Hopefully y'all like it, again no smut, remember, good things come to those who wait (not for too long bcs im obsessed with writing about this man ughbhghgy)
Again, I took my inspo from Driving Miss Falcone by (https://www.tumblr.com/genevievedarcygranger here on tumblr), check out the story if you can.
Enjoy, give feeback if u want xoxo.
Warnings: mature language, smut (not in this chapter sorry AGAIN), general horniness.
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“I wanted to tell you that tomorrow night I will be unavailable from 4 PM to 7 PM; your sister has requested me.”
Sofia was a very kind person; that much you knew. Your sister rarely did anything to hurt you or anyone else for that matter. So why on earth would she take Oz away for a few hours? Was she planning on telling him about your feelings? She wouldn’t. Maybe your smartass remarks finally caught up to her, maybe she wanted to teach you a lesson.
No, it’s okay, you’re going to be okay. Oz is a trustworthy guy, someone your dad depends on to take care of one of his most special treasures: you.
“Why?” you asked. You didn’t mean to make it sound so sharp; you weren’t mad, really, just curious.
“I’m sorry, but she said I couldn’t tell anyone.” He kept his eyes on the road ahead but glanced at you in the rearview mirror; his gaze was soft.
“Okay, if that’s what she said, it seems I’ll have to ask her.” You hated things not going your way, especially if Oz was hiding things from you. You two were supposed to be close, even if you were acting like a spoiled brat right now. If any other member of the staff had acted like this with you- it would have been a different story.
The next day, from morning until late evening, you tried to shake the uneasy feeling that your sister was gone to do something she was not supposed to. Either way, it was something very important. When you asked her, she quickly said it was none of your business and that you shouldn’t worry; she would get your driver back as soon as possible.
Something was definitely up. She took Oz with her when she had two other drivers. Maybe it was because Oz was intimidating; that huge scar on his face couldn’t have appeared there because he was a nice guy, and he wasn’t going to hesitate if push came to shove.
Tomorrow was your dad’s birthday party, and you had the most beautiful dress prepared: a gorgeous, short, white dress paired with the most stunning custom-made Louboutin heels, also white—a gift from your dad on your 18th birthday.
You knew tomorrow was going to be full of remarks like, “Oh my God, I haven’t seen you in SUCH a long time!” “I cradled you when you were just a widdle baby!” “How beautiful you have become!” Being the center of attention wasn’t so bad now; I mean, you were the baby of the family, and everyone doted on you.
The Falcone mansion was a very, very big house, full of rooms and bathrooms, and it was sometimes hard to figure out who came and went. As you rested on your family sofa in the living room, waiting to be welcomed in by your father in his office, you heard those familiar footsteps you knew so well. 
It was hard not to know who he was; that leg of his became harder to move late in the evening. You discovered this by literally dragging him with you into every shop that piqued your curiosity. From early afternoon until late evening, you were on the “prowl,” as your sister liked to say at family dinners—from meeting the daughter of X and Y in I-don’t-know-what shop to trying on a multitude of dresses, shoes, and accessories. He never told you, but you were sure it hurt him as well; still, Oz never showed any signs of discomfort or pain. He was always ready with a smile or a funny remark.
When you saw him, he had his jacket removed, and you noticed the way his belly pushed against his dress shirt. A few buttons were undone at the upper part of his torso, giving you a full look at the hair there. His tie was gone as well. You knew his shift was done; clearly, Sofia had dismissed him.
You immediately jumped off the sofa and went to say hi to him. He was clearly surprised to see you, especially in your pajamas. You also forgot about the attitude you were supposed to have. What was all that about anyway?
“Hi Oz, what are you doing here?”
He said he wanted to talk to your dad. What was up with all this secrecy? Did they think you were too stupid or naive to have a say or an opinion? When you asked what it was about, he said it was just some business stuff, nothing too important. You two could talk outside if you wanted; he wasn’t allowed inside the house after all.
“Okay, whatever.” It was hard not to get annoyed at both of them. You hadn’t even seen or talked to your sister. Did she even come home?
He must have been in there for about thirty minutes, but finally, he came out. Outside, he lit a cigarette and asked if you were cold, he could get you his jacket-forever the gentleman. You said no, the last thing you wanted to do was push him like that. You asked again about your sister and he didn’t want to tell you, again, saying it wasn’t right to your sister. Ok, now you really had to find out and with your heart beating a thousand beats per minute, you got even closer to him. The smell of his cologne, the one he always wore, left a trail wherever he went—a sort of flamboyance he allowed himself- the only one he was allowed in the chains of his current position. The smell of the cigarette mixed with it wasn’t the most pleasant, but whatever; it smelled like him.
“Please, Oz, I just want to know. Everyone always keeps me in the dark. You’re my friend—well, I consider you my friend—just tell me. Don’t be like the rest of them because you aren’t.” You looked at him with the most pained expression you could muster at that hour, your voice breaking-low enough to be a whisper
 “Doll, I—listen—” he started.
“Please, Oz, you're my driver, and you’re supposed to be by my side. I was kind to you; I always told you everything. I made sure my dad gave you all those bonuses for walking around with me.” You paused. “Please?” He looked at you like you were in hospice before saying:
“Okay, Jesus, um, your sister went to a journalist, that lady who came after her when you were off sulking in the car. She met up with her today—”
“What?” you interjected.
He inhaled deeply before continuing, “Something about your dad and some hookers at the club. Apparently, they died or something. Your sister was interested in whatever that woman had to say, nothing more.”
“Oh—”
“Oh, exactly. Now don’t go telling your brother or something—”
“Dad has hookers at the club?”
He looked at you, dumbfounded. “Y-yeah, I guess. Anyway, it is nothing you should concern yourself with, ya know?” You didn’t respond, lost in thought. How could she have been so stupid?
“Hey, hey—” he lowered his head to catch your big eyes, so full of things to say, a million thoughts running behind them. “Look at me. It’s going to be okay. Where do you want to go tomorrow?”
“I don’t know,” you said.
“C’mon, you gotta think about something. Until your dad’s birthday in the evening, we gotta go somewhere. There’s this new restaurant that opened up; I heard only good things about it—” How could she have been so careless? “Something with C—ugh, I can’t remember right now.”
“Okay, tomorrow we go. You have a nice night, Oz,” you said. “Take care of yourself.”
“Alright, you too. Sleep tight,” he said, a bit surprised at your quick dismissal of him. You knew that, but you had to think.
This was huge, like actually huge. If your dad found ou—Why was Oz visiting your dad?
The birthday party was the same as every year: all the family got together to have material for gossip later on in the day and hate each other just as much as they did when they were away. You never went with Oz to that restaurant because, frankly speaking, you were scared shitless. Your dad loved you and your siblings you knew that, in his own way, and he would never endanger any of you.
When your dad called Sofia into his office and she got all excited to give him his birthday present, you never would have thought in a million years that the night would end with her being picked up by the police. Alberto called you in a frenzy that night, his voice shaking with anger. You knew—your dad let this happen. This arrest was made on his grounds, on his territory—why? How?
When you visited your sweet sister, everyone still believed she was going to go home. This was just Dad’s way of scaring her, maybe to teach her a lesson—the most important one he had been repeating all your lives: DO NOT SPEAK TO THE PRESS.
Her lawyer was very, very expensive, and yet not even she could save her. You thought she was going to jail. No, she was going to Arkham for six months until she would be judged. Based on the false accusations that she hanged those sex workers at your dad’s club. What? Now that was actual insanity. She started yelling that Dad set her up, that he killed all those women—he killed their mom too. This was a lot to process. Your heart was beating out of your chest seeing the person who you thought was the most calm and collected person freak out, and rightfully so, because police officers took her away in like five minutes.
It all happened too fast, way too fast for this to be okay.
What sort of judge allows this to happen?
You knew it was his fault. He did this. Upon arriving back home, you were a wreck. How could you look your dad in the eye again?
One thing you knew for sure: you never wanted to see Oz again.
And your wish came true! Because your darling sweet daddy sent you far, far away, abroad, because he didn’t want to deal with you either, you presumed. He sent you to France, where a large part of your mom’s family lived.
You never learned French, but now was apparently the time. Your aunt and uncle lived quite well over there and even if they didn’t really keep in touch with you over the years, they accepted you with open arms. They had a large villa in the south, a pool outside, the beach was one hour away, two dogs that would run around and make your days better.
 But how could your days be good when your sister was in a looney bin, thrown in there like a rag, used and discarded? Your days were spent calling Alberto, asking about Sofia. You made sure he told her you loved her, that you asked about her, and that you two were going to get her out of there. Every year, Al told you she started losing herself more and more each day.
Oz, on the other hand, apparently thought he was a big man now; he ran the Iceberg Lounge, a funny name association, given that he hated being called “Penguin.” You knew he asked about you too, but Alberto said he told him to fuck off every time.
You weren’t allowed to go back home, at least that’s what you understood from your dad. He said you and your sister both lost yourselves a bit, maybe the money and the fame got to your head and that it was best you stayed there; the weather would do you wonders.
On the bright side, it had been five long years, and Alberto said he was 100% sure he was going to get Sofia out of that shithole, finally.
And when you thought that things were finally looking up for you, everything was going to be okay after such a long time of everything being shit—your dad died.
Your ears started ringing, like a train was passing in your head, when Alberto yelled out that he was gone over the phone. Your knees felt weak, like someone had transformed them into play-doh. I need to get home now.
Your dad wasn’t even cold in the grave when Alberto went AWOL—gone, no word from him since yesterday evening. Both you and Sofia were worried. Where was he?
You knew Oz was called to the house that day after your brother stopped responding to your texts. You could hear that loud voice of his, muffled but still loud enough to hear everything they said.
You hadn’t been here for quite some time—five years. Still, nothing changed. Sofia’s uncle Johnny and Milos filled your brother’s spot while he was gone; however, when he comes back-he’s going to be the boss, that's for sure.
Women weren’t allowed inside when the men were planning and talking business, but you weren’t inside. Plus, it wasn’t your fault Oz had a voice loud enough to hear from down the hall. Oz. Oz’s voice. Your heart skipped a beat whenever he spoke. This stupid attraction—you hoped in the years that passed it would go away, but apparently, it had not. In fact, it seemed to have grown alongside you. Maybe now he could have more courage; maybe this newly acquired upgrade made him the man you only saw glimpses of. You were a grown woman; surely now he had no reservations about you. Surely.
You didn't even hear your sister walk by with her bodyguards near your spot, attached to the door, too busy in your daydream.
“Am I interrupting you?” she asked, making you jump and curse under your breath. Her manner of speaking changed; so did her walk, her style, and her hair. But you knew the love you guys had for one another hadn’t changed.
“Fuck, Sofia, why are you sneaking up on me like that?” you whispered.
“Can you please move? I want to go inside,” she said, smiling, but the smile never reached her eyes. You moved, and the doors were opened.
“—in fact, it’s big. It has the potential to revolutionize the drug business,” you heard from inside. Huh? Is he referring to Al's plan?How does he know what Alberto wanted to do? You didn’t even know the whole story—of course you didn’t.
You decided to leave. You didn’t want Oz to see you, and you didn’t want to see him either. What was wrong with you?
On your way out, passing the exit, you saw this gorgeous purple car. Now there was only ONE man you knew who could possess something as flashy and in-your-face as a purple fucking car.
It wasn’t Milos, by the way. Then you heard his footsteps, and they were coming-fast, like really fucking fast.
Shit, okay, I’m leaving—go up the stairs now. Before you could hide yourself in one of the upper rooms, you heard Sofia yell out your name.
“Oz, you remember my little sister, right? She had such a fondness for you and you of her, from what I remember. You two haven’t seen each other for such a long time.” Okay, you couldn’t hide, so just put on a brave face and go say hi. “Hi, Oz, you ruined my life, but don’t worry, I would still ride you.” You wished you were back in Europe.
Turning the corner was the easy part; looking at him was the hard part. He looked different, yes—but still the same. His clothing had definitely changed; his black suit was now replaced with a purple one, like the car. Jesus. While you descended the staircase in your short flowery dress, it felt like your date was waiting for you downstairs to take you to prom. Those seven seconds you spent getting down the staircase felt like seven hours. Please, ground, swallow me whole now.
Once you got down and saw him again for the first time in five years, up close, he looked somehow more handsome. His scar was more pronounced, yes, but it added to his allure. Oh God, he’s smiling. Not only did he have a purple car and a purple suit, but this man had golden teeth as well. On a lighter note, he smelled like cologne, cigarettes, and aftershave—just like you remembered him smelling. Oh, that brings you back.
“Hi, Oz,” you said, smiling ear to ear.
He looked you up and down, still smiling. “Wow, you’re just as gorgeous as I remember.”
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sopfiista · 7 months ago
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FOUND FAMILY
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I literally love this show and am low key obsessed. Then I thought about writing something cute abt Mob. NOTHING SEXUAL CUZ THAT BOY IS LIKE THIRTEEN
Mob didn’t have those special family friendships. Sure, he had his actual family, but he yearned for an actual friendship that made you comfortable with.
He guessed Reigen was one… but he was more like a teacher, not a family member.
There was you, of course, but Mob never really thought you liked him. You hung out with him a lot, but you were mech more popular and charismatic than him. You probably didn’t even see him as a close friend.
Today was like any other day after school. You had your little after school classes and he had his body-fitness club. Like usual, you would wait for him after your class by the exit, texting on your phone or chatting with a few friends.
Today you were by yourself, which made Mob feel a lot better. He liked it when it was only you and him.
You seemed to notice him before he could call out to you, looking up and smiling.
You shoved your phone into your pocket and jogged up to him.
“Hey mob!” You said, giving him your toothy grin, like usual.
“Hi…” he said, giving you a tiny smile.
“How was class?” You asked, making conversation.
“It was okay… I’m just a bit tired…” he sighed, flattening his messed up hair a bit. You laughed behind your hand.
“That club does that to ya,” you said, shrugging, “can I tell you about my club?”
Mob nodded. He liked your voice, so he let you talk.
“Well, my book club started a new book, which is really exciting!” You said, beaming at him, “I don’t remember the book… but it’s about some wizard boy or whatever… it’s really good though!”
You went on about the book, also informing him about some drama going on between your two friends and some other things.
A warm blanket of comfort washed over him as he listen to you talk, making sure to stay slow so the walk would finished later.
“- and yeah,” you sighed, “and that Tanaka girl is still asking me to ask you about your brother,”
Mob hummed, nodding. He had put his hands into his pockets, fingers gripped around his phone. He was a bit jealous of what she had said…
“But I told her no. Like straight up! You told me to stop being so nice a be a bit straightforward… so I did!” You laughed, shaking her head, “so thank you for the advice. If she comes up to you, you say no, okay?”
Mob hummed, nodding.
“Yeah…” he said, knowing he would do the complete opposite. He hated being rude to people and making them sad.
“Tell me about your day,” you said, turning to him.
Mob looked over at you, a bit shocked. “Uhm… well…” he said, thinking, “nothing has happened recently… I took off work today, somehow, but that’s about it.”
You hummed.
“Yeah… your boss has always seemed a bit shady to me…” you mumbled, “but, if you’re happy, then that’s all that matters!”
Mob stayed silent, feeling his chest bloom in happiness. He had been told that by a few people, but not many. Usually it was Reigen, who would say it half-heartedly.
But yours was genuine.
Mob just looked at you, standing still. You had stopped, asking if he was okay. He was. He was very okay.
He had found someone who never judged him. Someone who would defend him without him there. Someone he could trust completely.
He had finally found his family.
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