#there are so many of these bitches
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Skill Set - Haikyu men
What body part (hands, mouth, cock) haikyu men are best with. All characters post timeskip.
Can finger you like no one else. One of the few men who has not lost the fine art of fingering. His fingers are long and slender but so strong. They're callused from years of playing, but that only heightens your sensitivity. He finds your g spot easily, pressing into it until you’re soaked and needy. “Hmm, you like when I touch you like that, angel?” He toys with your clit until you’re right at the edge before plunging his fingers back into your throbbing pussy. Loves how easy it is to tease you like that. How fully in control he is over your pleasure with just a few touches. It’s such an ordinary part of the body, the hands, and yet his can pull the sweetest moans out of you like it’s nothing. “Go on and cum all over my fingers, baby. Wanna feel you squeeze ‘em real good.” Will literally play with your pussy for hours and absolutely will.
Tendou (loves making you watch in the mirror), Kageyama, tsukki (particularly loves teasing & is a lil meanie), Yamaguchi (got all his tips from tsukki), oikawa, kita, goshiki, semi. The way its almost exclusively setters lmao truly no one is better with their hands.
Loves eating pussy so much. Does it for his own pleasure as much as yours. Does it in all different positions - missionary, face sitting, from the back. Literally doesn’t care as long as he gets to eat you out. He presses his tongue into your tight hole, wiggling the warm, soft muscle inside you. “Mmm, tastes so fucking sweet.” Sucks on your clit until you’re squirming away from him. But don’t think you’re going anywhere. He’ll grip your hips tight, flicking his tongue over your aching clit until you’re gasping and shaking. He loves when you get lost in it, rutting your pussy against his tongue. “Yeah, baby, fuck my tongue just like that.” He’s not happy until his face is covered in your slick cum.
Tanaka, Nishinoya (regularly cums himself while eating you out), Sugawara, Kenma (loves face sitting bc all he has to do is lay down and move his tongue), Suna (Almost made him a hands guy, but I get the vibes he’s so fucking good at eating pussy. The biggest tease and makes you beg for it), Terushima (the tongue ring alone tells you all you need to know)
Gives the best dick. He’s nice and big, making your pussy stretch pleasurable every time. He knows exactly where to angle himself to get you seeing stars. Loves pressing your knees up to your chest and getting himself so deep inside you. “Feel that baby? Feel me in your tummy?” A weaker man would bust when he felt your pussy squeezing him like a vice, but he has unrivaled restraint. He knows how to perfectly work you up with, slow, long thrusts, then finishes you off fast and hard snaps of his hips. He’s so strong and can put the most delicious weight behind each pounding thrust. “Fuck princess, feel so good cumming on my cock.” Expect to go multiple rounds.
Ushijima (he has the biggest, thickest cock), Asahi, Hinata (energizer bunny level stamina and will literally rut into until he physically cannot cum anymore), Sakusa, Aran, Atsumu (he’s so fucking cocky about it. pun not intended), Daichi
BONUS - The men who can literally do it all. Can finger you senseless, will eat your pussy for hours, and will fuck you until you can barely walk. All above applies to them
Bokuto (the best partner literally lives to pleasure you), Coach Ukai (look at this man and tell me he doesn’t know how to fuck. I dare you), Iwaizumi, Osamu (you just know Atsumu mad he is here over him), Kuroo
#I think I got everyone#but I probaly missed someone#there are so many of these bitches#haikyuu smut#haikyu smut#haikyu x reader#haikyu headcanons#haikyu hcs#kageyama smut#hinata shoyo smut#suna smut#bokuto smut#iwaizumi smut#ukai smut#atsumu smut#osamu smut#nishinoya smut#ushijima smut#tsukki smut#sugawara smut#kuroo smut#kenma smut#literally can't take everyone I give up
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Lmao OMFG Martin. He's now confirmed to have been jealous of
- (possibly lesbian?) Cop for daring to have private conversations with Jon
- literal embodiment of death Jon has only metaphorically met in a coma-dream
- lady he talked to for half an hour, once
Truly he is the "you know other people" meme
#i mean he was also catty to georgie but at least that's his ex gf#the magnus archives#martin blackwood#jonmartin#jmart#so so unhinged#i know people mostly love to coo over him bc they have self-esteem issues and social anxiety too#i simo over him for being a jealous petty argumentative passive aggressive bitch with oh so many issues#truly the character of all time#WHEN JON TALKED WITH HELEN HE'S BEEN BARELY NICE TO MARTIN AND ALSO ACCUSED YOU OF MURDER??#are you OK Martin???#i know it ended to working out but please have better taste girl
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These two idiots kill me because what Crowley is hearing from Aziraphale is, “I am able to look past your demonic nature because I love you so much, but if there was a way, I would change that part of you” and what Crowley wants to hear is, “I look at all of you and I love all of you”
Meanwhile Aziraphale’s actually saying, “I love every version of you that I’ve known, but I miss the smile you had when I met you and I would give anything to bring that joy back”
#communication? these bitches never heard of it#they’re so tragic and for what#good omens#ineffable husbands#aziraphale#anthony j crowley#crowley#good omens season two#good omens s2#good omens season 2#miscommunication#ineffable idiots#ineffable divorce#I’ve seen so many variations of this post and they all destroy me
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Masquerade Road Trip 🚌
Okay but like…. What if instead of using mirrors they had to stuff this whole cast of people into a bus/van
It’d be a little funny
(Also turn up phone brightness to see it better. Or don’t. Idk I don’t control you)
#Listen guys#i put so many fucking details in this#Look please please please please#All of the items up top belong to people. Somewhat obviously but please notice the whack a bitch briefcase#Jamiazu…. Psspspspspspslslsoosos#To me this events happens after they’re dating so-#OH ALSO MAL MAL#HES DOING HIS “I got invited! :)” SIT#ANYWAYS#twst#twisted wonderland#twst fanart#twisted wonderland fanart#okay here we go#riddle rosehearts#malleus draconia#epel felmier#deuce spade#epeldeuce#if you squint#its implied#anyways#rook hunt#sebek zigvolt#silver#silver vanrouge#ruggie bucchi#idia shroud#jamil viper#azul ashengrotto
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We were so close to smoking not being cool anymore. We were so close. Then they flavored it mango and now it's taboo to criticize it anymore. People don't ask if they're allowed to vape indoors, they aren't considerate of people who may have health problems that are triggered by the chemicals or if it just bothers them, people don't care that they're supporting an industry built on corruption and greed, they can't see it draining their pockets and much less their health. We were so close to smoking not being cool anymore.
#i hate hate HATE nicotine after watching my parents smoke when i grew up#its gross and bad for your money and bad for your health#and i get it. theres SO MANY socioeconomic factors that make it a complicated issue.#you CANT blame smokers.#but it feels like people are just accepting the institution for what it is bc now it tastes good#bitch just chew gum jfc#it doesn't matter if its an industry issue. we have seen in the past that making it “uncool” hurts the industry#make nicotine uncool again PLEASE#grumbles
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Baldurs gate isn’t a dnd game it’s a really really really hard dress up game
#bg3#baldurs gate#gale dekarios#gale of waterdeep#astarion#halsin#shadowheart#lae'zel#wyll ravengard#I’m specifically talking about the big threes outfits#dyed kethricks red and gold for bae’zel#wore gortashs on my tavs until I got orins then put gortash on gale#so many good fits#so many good people with good outfits too#so I’m gonna be a faaaaancy bitch in my durge play through lmao#I want isobels armor so bad lmao#karlach
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the best of Astarion | HAPPY BIRTHDAY KAP ♡
bonus:
#ipost#Astarion#baldur's gate 3#baldurs gate 3#bg3edit#baldursgateedit#gamingnetwork#vgedit#videogameedit#gamingedit#usernik#miyku#usermarina#dailygaming#gameplaydaily#bgedit#bg3#baldur's gate#Astarion Ancunin#Neil Newbon#Making this was actually so so much fun#although I had to combine the last couple of gifs cause obviously it's too many gifs on its own#counting 32 gifs is probably the biggest gifset I ever made but fuck it was the most fun as well#he's such a sassy bitch I love him#HAPPY BIRTHDAY KAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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jinx fans who hate caitlyn and caitlyn fans who hate jinx need to grow up and realize they’re like tragic foils of each other and the only proper way to live life is to be utterly destroyed by both characters
#arcane#jinx arcane#caitlyn arcane#like i see soooo many people hating on one or the other#why are we putting two bad bitches against each other#it’s already rough for the characters in the show then the fans get so weird#i just love every character in this show#they’re all so well written
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aemond: i love that my uncle tried to murder me in my own bed. he’s soooooooo afraid of me—
daemon, living it up in harrenhall:
#house of the dragon#hotd spoilers#hotd meme#daemon really said ‘im about to beat this bitch up’#daemon plotting evilly in the corner doing the pyramid of evil contemplation with his hands#daemon really is an unbothered bitch and i love that about him#aemond honey you are so delulu you give many a run for their money 😂😂#aemond i love you but stfu 😙#daemon targaryen#aemond targaryen#aemond one eye#aemond targaryen x reader#aemond x reader#daemon x reader#rhaenyra targaryen#aegon targaryen#aegon ii targaryen#aegon x reader#helaena targaryen#alicent hightower#jacerys velaryon#baela targaryen#rhaena targaryen
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we all make mistakes when we're 19. or something
#ace attorney#gir bitching#klavier gavin#daryan crescend#apollo justice#klapollo#i had to draw a bored ape for this please#this would have been funnier to draw like 2 years ago but i was watching a jauwn vid and couldn't stop thinking abt it#so many world events the gavinners witnessed. so many tiktok-fueled music trends
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I feel like people have been quick to dismiss Mimzy's importance in Ep. 5
I've been seeing a lot of Mimzy hate, mainly on Reddit, where people are genuinely REALLY hating on Mimzy because she was annoying, interrupted Hell's Greatest Dad, and served no purpose in the episode.
Whilst the previous two points are down to personal taste, I feel like considering Mimzy's role in this episode nonexistent, or that she just exists for fanservice here, is greatly overlooking what this episode is about. There are two focuses to the episode, one of course being Lucifer and his relationship with Charlie, but it's also the deepest look into Alastor's actual character that we've gotten so far, I'd say significantly more than the finale. We see two sides to Alastor that both Mimzy and Luficier bring out, and I wanted to kind of highlight my thoughts and what the episode was trying to show us about Alastor that we wouldn't have gotten if Mimzy wasn't there.
Alastor's instant hostility towards Lucifer makes it incredibly clear that Alastor can't keep his cool all the time - his two biggest flaws is that he is power-hungry and incredibly petty. From what we know - and what is likely to be true considering Lucifer is shown to have no idea who he is - Alastor has never met Lucifer before this. If the theories that he belongs to Eve/Lilith in some way are true, there is reasonable ground to say that this immediate hatred towards him could be justified, maybe it was in some way Lucifer's fault that he's caught in this deal and this is his way of taking it out on him or trying to uphold his end of that deal.
But look how much his mask slips, look how annoyed and angry he is. If this was a font that he was doing to somehow make Lucifer intentionally mad at him for some sort of personal gain, he wouldn't have looked so murderous. Him just leaning down and hissing 'fuck you' right in his face was so shocking for the audience purely because no one has done that to him before, no one has pushed him so much.
This indicates that Alastor isn't just playing some sort of game, Lucifer genuinely got under his skin, because he is so obviously more powerful than Alastor and he HATES that. He hates being reminded that he's not the biggest meanest in Hell - this was explored more in his showdown in Adam, but at the time of this episode's release, this is the most flawed and 'human' Alastor has ever felt. He's dropped from this force of mysterious evil, to randomly picking a fight with the Devil himself because he was so catty about being shown up.
As further reinforced with him snapping at Husk when he also reminded him he wasn't as all-powerful as he sees himself to be, Alastor will lash out at those who make him feel like he isn't the one in control and pulling the strings of everything - we finally see a hint of motivation for him sticking around at the hotel at all.
But then there's Mimzy.
We immediately go from seeing Alastor at his worst, at his most aggravated and petty, to seeing him literally melt into a hug. The demon who, according to Viv herself, hates physical contact so much that he would distort and melt himself to get away from it. We so quickly go from being shocked that Alastor is behaving so spitefully to now having to take in Alastor being ecstatic to see someone who he considers to be a friend.
Having this be so directly after his massive tiff with Lucifer is so important. If this wasn't included in this episode, our only insight into the person Alastor actually is would be that he's an asshole. Picking fights with people just because he wants to stay on top, that its the thing he cares about the most. But Mimzy does come along, and we see that it isn't true at all - and its confusing, and that is so perfect.
You think you're getting somewhere with the person Alastor is, but you see that, hold on, there is actually a semblance of heart in there, here he is actually caring about someone. But what is so important about this being a relationship he shares with Mimzy, and something that couldn't at all be explored with, say, Rosie, is the kind of person Mimzy is.
Mimzy double crossed Alastor. And, according to Husk, this is a somewhat regular occurace. We can see that Alastor is annoyed at her, and I think most of us were prepared for him to do something to her like he was doing to those loan sharks a few seconds before this confrontation.
But...he doesn't. Not at all, he doesn't even snap at her. Perhaps scold her a bit, but other than that, he is so nice to her and just politely tells her to leave and that is that. He does more shit to Lucifer, who literally hasn't done nothing but exist in his presence, than someone who just trampled all over his ego by using him, both as a shield and, well, somewhat emotionally.
In this episode, Alastor is shown to lash out. Easily. All you have to do is be more powerful than Alastor, and he won't like you - that's the impression you'd get from his scenes with Lucifer alone. But we have his scenes with Mimzy as well, and you're being told, hold on, no, that isn't quite correct, because he's not acting the same here. What has Alastor got to gain from letting Mimzy get off of this with no repercussions? Mimzy, someone who has probably sold her soul to someone else and has absolutely no power at all.
Nothing. He does it because Alastor cares about her.
I don't think I would have considered his friendship with Rosie to be genuine at all if it wasn't for his friendship with Mimzy. Rosie is so powerful, and Alastor has so much to gain from being in close cahoots with her, but it's so clear that he doesn't care about that, but he sees her as an equal. If all we saw from Alastor in that episode was him lusting for power, it would render the way we see all his relationships with people to be of some gain to him somehow. ESPECIALLY Rosie and other Overlords like Zestial.
This makes Alastor and Mimzy's relationship arguably one of the most interesting in the show. Someone who is so powerful and unpredictable, who hardly cares for anyone other than himself, caring about this absolute gremlin of a woman. He likes Mimzy purely because she's fun to be around, a sentiment you might expect from Alastor, with his stated reasoning for joining the hotel being to laugh at people, but he's in no way laughing at Mimzy. You can tell that he doesn't intimidate her at all, because she has the absolute balls to pull off the loan shark thing with him.
Mimzy and Lucifer's interactions with Alastor has made him to be one, if not THE most interesting character in the show. Because you're exploring two contradictory sides of the same coin at once. One where he gets so worked up and angry over not having the power he sees himself as having, and one where he's visibly hurt that his long time friend used him. In one instance you have him pulling out all the stops to be as hostile as he could be to Lucifer without actually hurting him (even though he clearly wants to), and another where he has full range to hurt Mimzy as much as he wants to, but he doesn't.
Alastor cares about people. But also disregards people like playing cards. He is such a mixed bag, so far from being one note, and you wouldn't have gotten that insight without Mimzy.
#alastor#alastor hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel#mimzy#hazbin hotel mimzy#lucifer morningstar#hazbin hotel lucifer#hazbin hotel analysis#also very telling that reddit shits so strongly on one of the only plus size women in the show over her acting like a bitch in hell#you know#like so many other characters in the show
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Killer loves his big dumb X too
#darkzyx#undertale au#undertale fandom#utmv#utmv comic#killer sans#cross sans#could be interpreted as sanscest#cross has so many bitches and none at all at the same time#it warps time and space
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I wonder if Charles likes Edwin's bitchiness so much because Edwin is never afraid to tell people exactly what he's thinking and doesn't give a fuck about consequences
For someone who spent a solid chunk of his life walking on eggshells around a violent father and still does his level best to make people think he's a walking ball of sunshine, that has to feel refreshing as fuck
#dead boy detectives#Charles Rowland#meta#charles rowland meta#dbda meta#my meta#I bet there's been many occasions where Charles was very happy Edwin bitched at a difficult client so he didn't have to repress it as much#10n#50n#100n#200n#300n#400n#500n#600n#700n#800n#900n#1kn
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sith afterlife looks a bit different.
#count dooku#my art#star wars#sith ghost dooku has so much potential.#the force looked at him and said bitch what have you done#and so it put him on reaper/ferryman duty#so he can see how many lives his actions cost. bc he has to send all of them off <3 individually <33
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Contributing to the "Draw Hatsune Miku based on your culture" trend with a Persian Court Dancer Miku eheheeee
#evil bitch creations#hatsune miku#miku hatsune#iran#vocaloid#so there were MANY traditional clothes/costumes I was considering from Iran for miss Miku!#but Persian Court Dancer attire stuck to me
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Prompt 266
Back on my Danny & Ras frienemies/rivals/maybe-lovers-nobody-can-tell-their-signals-are-very-mixed train.
See, Danny has gone through time a lot. Often. It comes with being Clockwork’s charge-son-thing and honestly he finds it fun. And several times he’s used this time travelling to get some training in. Enter Ras, stage left, also a teen at the time and also learning swordsmanship from the same person.
And they… utterly despise each other. They would kill the other for an apple slice, if the other one would die! But also, only they can kill the other, as it is obviously their right!
And well, they keep running into each other. It has been a hundred years, surely the other would die by now? But of course their rival would live through utter spite. Probably to spite them specifically.
The amount of times they have ended up sparring- trying to kill each other or not- the moment they see the other is actually ridiculous. But time is also passing. And… Danny understands, not having another to talk about things people are forgetting, or have already forgotten.
How they ended up actually talking without a murder attempt was a long story that included a demon, a dragon, a pair of fae, some bandits, and a lot of alcohol, but it happened. And then it happens again. And again, and now it’s just kind of normal to share a drink after their spars, talking about things that no longer exist, and things they miss.
Sure Danny can go back in time again, but he knows better than to do it willy nilly. He’s matured, he’s been an adult for a hundred years now, he knows there’s consequences for messing with time, even with Clockwork’s blessings.
The first time they got married was technically for an undercover assassination. Well, Ras was there to assassinate someone, Danny was there to grab an artifact that should Not be in the realm of the living. And they got divorced after, it was fine.
They just, also got married again when they met a few years later, for another job. And… okay, so maybe they have gotten married over a dozen times now and only divorced like half of those times. Half of those were for the bit or while drunk!
And even if technically they’re married or shared a bed, it’s not like they're exclusive! As Ras’ daughters’ existences attest to (adopted in one case or not). They don’t exactly have a label for their relationship, despite others asking for one or trying to put a name to it themselves.
Now Danny knows Ras isn’t exactly a good dude, or at least on the side of ‘good’ as he’s a literal assassin. But he also knows that good? Bad? Rather relative. He had gotten labeled as a villain when he was just trying to help all that time ago after all, and really who was he to tell someone else how to live their life?
Which brings him to now, where he’s run into his old frienemy-rival and his youngest daughter. Who has a braindead teenager and a small toddler. Which is fine, really- but also, Talia dear, why are you using a brain dead teenager to guard your three year old son?
…
Okay, Talia dear, Ras (Derogatory), why are you using your brain dead son and grandson to guard your younger son and grandson? Do you not have the Pits, which you were soo proud about Ras? Yes, he will spar with you, but for Realms’ sake, heal, what’s his name? Ah yes, go heal Jason and he’ll actually stick around for a few years, deal? Good.
#DCxDP#DPxDC#Prompts#Deadly Decisions#Danny is Not Ghost King & he doesn’t want to be#Danny isn’t from the same timeline as DC but he hops around so many that he’s formed a few favorites#You Know the bats are going to go crazy searching for some sort of proof of Danny’s existence when they finally communicate w/ each other#Why yes Danny is an adult lol (he is also tall but has body more like his mom)#Yes Sam showed him how to do makeup & it was a bonding thing while they bitched#Is Danny Dusan’s mom? Wonderful question that the league is pondering themself#Danny introduced Sam & Tucker to Ras once & it was horrific how well they got along#Danny almost forgot that Tucker was once a royal dictator who had constant assassination attempts#Sam & Ras bond over violent love of nature & willingness to kill to keep it safe from assholes#Damian about Danny: Obviously this is Grandmother#Jason after being thrown in the Pit: Who are you Where am I What the fuck#Damian: :O Akhi you can speak now :D Come see my puppy Grandmother gave me for protection#Ras & Danny: Threatening each other#Everyone else: Do they want to kill each other or are they flirting or both…#Space Core Danny#Star Core Jason
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