#then who are they to say no
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A few months before Danny gets his powers, while on a trip to Gotham with his family (maybe there was a ghost convention or something). While in Gotham Danny some how figures out that Bruce Wayne is Batman. I don’t know how he figures it out, but he does. When they get back to Amity Danny jokingly makes a power point presentation for his parents about why they should put in their will that if something ever happened to them Bruce Wayne would get custody of him (and Jazz if she’s still underage at the time).
A couple of his points are:
He’s a billionaire so you know he’ll be able to afford to take care of me and Jazz
He has a mansion so lots of space and big rooms
He’s got a butler
He’s already well known for adopting black haired blue eyed children so he probs wouldn’t be opposed to taking me in
He’s got kids of his own already so me and Jazz would get more siblings!!
He’s Batman
Danny did the whole power point as a joke but his parents actually took it kind of seriously. Cause up to this point neither one of them had thought about what would happen to Danny and Jazz if the both of them where to die. So they make a will and put in it that if they both die then Bruce Wayne gets custody of their kids. And then they all promptly forget about it.
Two years later Bruce Wayne gets a call from a man claiming to be the executor of the Fenton will and that Bruce’s presence is requested in Amity Park for the reading of the Fenton will. Bruce is wracking his brain trying to remember who the Fenton’s are and if how he knows them. But the man is coming up blank (cause he’s never actually met them before). He goes to the will reading and is shocked to hear that the Fenton’s, two people he’s never met before, have left custody of their 16yo son to him.
Danny is just as shocked because holy shit that power point was a joke. He didn’t mean for his parents to actually take it seriously and do that!!! And Vlad is pissed. He was sure he was gonna get custody of Danny after killing off the Fenton parents! Bruce is trying to figure out why these two strangers left their son to him. He’s watching Danny with eagle eyes trying to figure the kid out. And he sees the way Danny flinches whenever Vlad gets close or puts his hand on Danny’s shoulder.
Vlad tries to convince Bruce it would be better for Danny if Bruce gave up custody to him(Vlad). He’s know the boy for two years after all and he was actually a family friend. Danny meanwhile is silently shaking his head and giving Bruce pleading eyes silently begging him not to let Vlad take him. Bruce just tells Vlad that the Fenton’s must have had a good reason for giving him(Bruce) custody instead of giving it to Vlad, and he’s going to abide by the Fenton’s wishes.
Bruce leaves with Danny and once in the limo he asks Danny if he’s ever met him or his parents before. Poor Danny has to explain how he jokingly made a power point about why his parents should leave custody of him to Bruce in the event of their deaths, and how he never thought his parents would actually take it seriously. But hey at least he doesn’t have to go live with Vlad now!
#danny phantom#batman#dp x dc#dpxdc#dc x dp#dp x dc prompt#dp x dc crossover#danny fenton#ghost king phantom#it was supposed to be a joke#but the Fenton parents are weird#and extra#and they love their kids#so if their son wants Bruce Wayne to be their back up in the event of their demise#then who are they to say no#Bruce is super confused when he shows up for the will reading#who the hell are these people#the executor of the will didn’t know that the Fenton’s and Bruce didn’t know each other#he saw Bruce Wayne’s name and that he was being left custody of Danny#and he just assumed that the Fenton’s and the Wayne’s where friends#plus Wayne is always adopting orphaned kids with black hair and blue eyes#and Danny fits that perfectly#the man did not question this decision for a single second#vlad is beyond pissed#he killed the Fenton parents to get custody of Danny#and it was all for nothing cause those idiots didn’t leave him custody#he’s trying to figure out how the Fenton’s knew Bruce Wayne as well#Danny is just super embarrassed#it was a damn joke!#it wasn’t supposed to be taken seriously
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one time I used the ben affleck smoking reaction image in the family group chat and my mom replied with the funniest possible response which was: "mommy doesn't know who the guy is???" and that phrase has not left my brain since. I'll see blorbos on my dash that I don't recognize and I'll be like well it seems mommy doesn't know who the guy is.
#the funny thing is she DOES know who ben affleck is#mom you're the one who made me watch good will hunting!!!#ah well. mommy doesn't know who the guy is#I'm gonna start saying that as if it's a popular meme phrase that everyone knows. maybe i can gaslight pple into using it#....you know what. please reblog this actually. it's what mommy deserves
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work all night on a drink of rum
daylight come and me wan go home
stack banana til the morning come
daylight come and me wan go home
come mr tallyman tally me banana
daylight come and me wan go home
come mr tallyman tally me banana
daylight come and me wan go home
lift six foot seven foot eight foot bunch
daylight come and me wan go home
six foot seven foot eight foot bunch
daylight come and me wan go home
day
me say dayo
daylight come and me wan go home
day
me say day
me say day
me say dayo
daylight come and me wan go home
a beautiful bunch of ripe banana
daylight come and me wan go home
hide the deadly black tarantula
daylight come and me wan go home
lift six foot seven foot eight foot bunch
daylight come and me wan go home
six foot seven foot eight foot bunch
daylight come and me wan go home
day
me say dayo
daylight come and me wan go home
day
me say day
me say day
me say dayo
daylight come and me wan go home
come mr tallyman tally me banana
daylight come and me wan go home
come mr tallyman tally me banana
daylight come and me wan go home
dayo
dayo
daylight come and me wan go home
day
me say day
me say day
me say dayo
daylight come and me wan go home
#someone suggested i turn off reblogs. to that i say. i’m not a fucking quitter#esp when i get to see my husband dancing in my notifs every time this gets a note#since this reached 30k notes i wanted to say that people in the notes saying you shouldn’t feel safe around horses are right#story time :) when i was very little i got kicked in the face by a horse.#obviously this is very dangerous and i could have been concussed but there was no bleeding or bruising or no teeth knocked out#so my family didn’t believe me and even tried to convince me that it never happened at all. accused me of lying about it#it was specifically my grandma (who i realized much later in life was extremely emotionally abusive) who insisted i was lying.#but i remember it clearly. i know that it happened. i know that it struck my front teeth and knocked me to the ground#and i have never felt safe around horses since <3 or my family actually#ahem. i always felt safe around my grandparents. ‘‘not anymore’’ said knife grandma#are you still reading this?#reality is an illusion the universe is a hologram#you just lost the game#speaking of loss#|#|/#||#|_
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#say it louder for the people in the back👏#idk who that other dude is😭#xmen#Wolverine#logan howlett#dehydration#actors#actor#hugh jackman#tom welling#smallville#clark kent#Superman
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>Join a union
>Hear people constantly complaining that the current union leadership is super corrupt, it's all just the same ten guys making all the decisions in secret and nobody else in the union ever gets to know what's going on
>Go to the monthly union meetings that are completely open to all 1200 union members
>The only attendees are the same ten guys every month, giving detailed reports about everything that's going on
#anyway this is why i'm the way i am about politics and people who advocate against 'participating in the system'#i am on my way to becoming one of the ten guys and frankly? it's fucking exhausting#i chatted with the union president afterwards and he got this haunted look in his eye#and was like 'i'm glad to see you getting involved but remember you can say no. you can always say no.#don't let anyone bully you into doing more than you want to. make time for yourself. YOU CAN SAY NO.'#which was good and much appreciated advice! but also. ominous
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interaction i have with shocking regularity is when someone’s complaining abt someone they know and theyre like “ughh they’re 21 and dont have a job and refuse to learn to drive” and then they remember who they’re talking to (me. 21 cant work cant drive) and go like
#text#‘ur situation is different’ Do u know Their situation enough to say that lol#also like. be srs if u didnt know me ud think the same way abt me. Do u think this abt me subconsciously?? guessing yes#The only person who HASNT made me feel like this and has actually articulated what they meant in a way that didnt feel like a dig#at me was 💫 last night hence why its on my mind
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Just in case you've never seen a monkey run …… (a monkey in qianling mountain黔灵山 in china)
#china#video#douyin#miscellaneous#run#cnetizens says he is injured by accident#there's an aunt on the mountain who takes care of him and he goes to that aunt every day for food#btw the monkeys in Emei Mountain are notorious bullies#they will attack humans indiscriminately#don't feed don't look at them#don't bring backpacks with snacks#but china's Rhinopithecus 金丝猴jinsihou are very cute and docile#funny
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white americans when you tell them that the idea of climate change as an impending disaster is a reductive first world perspective because it’s a tangible reality for many in the global south already:
#climate change#im TIRED#and i’m saying this as someone who also lives in the US.#im glad that none of you have to worry about your family and friends in other countries dying because of the heat#but this idea that “oh we have to stop it before we reach the extreme” is SO STUPID#because it’s already reached the extreme in some places!!#people are dying in south asia. people are dying in southeast asia. people are dying in africa. people are dying in central america.#people are dying in south america. people are dying in island nations.#what will it take you to care about these people#or will you not care until it’s people who look like you who are dying.
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Couple + Sibling/relative third wheel is honestly an S-tier trio dynamic and I wish we saw more of this in media.
"You are my soulmate. We are forged together by battle and tears and love. Also my brother's coming along."
"Yo."
#i'm saying this as someone who's been both one half of the couple and also the sibling third wheel#thinking about Reidan + Jaime
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when we were studying the bible in literature class (so we have the context necessary for later works that reference the bible), i think we were at the book of jonah, and one of my classmates was studying the text very intently, and then looked up and earnestly said "professor, i don't understand the will of god"
the teacher was just like. well sadly i am a literature teacher and not a priest so i can't help you there. but if it helps, many people throughout history had the same problem.
#this one of the two very heavy-hitter sentences she said regarding literature class#with the other one being “én megvetem janus pannoniust”#sorry i just. idk if it's actually as funny but goddamn in that situation it was hilarious#i don't understand the will of god...... well show me someone who does#“én nem értem isten akaratát” number one thing to say during high school literature class#🌌
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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The world exists in such a baffling state of simultaneous sex-aversion and sex-hegemony. Every social platform on the internet is trying to banish sex workers to the shadow realm but I can't post a tweet without at least two bots replying P U S S Y I N B I O. People are self-censoring sex to seggs and $3× but every other ad you see is still filled with half-naked women. Rightwingers want queer people arrested for so much as existing in the same postal code as a child and are also drumming up a moral panic about how teenage boys aren't getting laid enough. I feel like I'm losing my mind.
#it's bad if you want i have sex it's also bad if you DON'T want to have sex#god forbid if you're a woman in a heterosexual marriage and aren't in the mood#that's 'withholding sex' and you're clearly abusive scum who should be divorced and left without any of your shared assets.#but if you DO have sex now you're a degenerate freak plotting for the downfall of western society#i don't know what to say i'm just so tired#politics#culture#queerphobia#lgbtqia#misogyny#<it's not the exclusive source but let's be honest sooo much of this is integral to the patriarchy#patriarchy needs access to an underclass they can treat like sex objects but they also don't want them to have any human rights#so sexuality is both obligatory and stigmatized#purity culture#i'm really struggling with tagging this because most of the appropiate tags would- in a beautiful twist of irony- get me booted off tumblr
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I'M FUCKING CRYING LMAOOO
#as someone who doesn't actually hate her music/a decent amount of her music i gotta say it's accurate#the thousand words crammed into one line and difficult flow/pacing#was about to tag this taylor swift and realized i wanna live#anti taylor swift#i guess???????#taylor swift critical#i suppose??????
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can't believe we're all adults being forced into the club penguin level of censorship in 2024
#ramble#if you say unalive in front of me i will personally kill you with my hands#you just can't muffle and censor and hold someone's hand through some things#some things are horrible. and they should be spoken aloud and they should upset you. because they are horrible#the second we started kidzbopifying the world was the end of taking anything seriously i think#i'm not even joking i've spoken to people older than me who won't even say the world sex#this isn't the playground you're not going to get in trouble just let us say the word!!!!!!#how am i supposed to listen to you when you won't even say the thing you're supposed to be talking about#yes this is the fault of the platforms with their censorship rules but the fact that we all just go along with it like it's not dystopian#you do know it doesn't stop with cursing right. people are already having to censor queer terms because they get flagged as inappropriate
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the way people online talk about autism is getting really weird, like do they know that neurotypicals still have interests? that someone being passionate about a hobby doesn't mean they're autistic? you guys know that right
#woof#like self diagnosis is one thing#but saying someone is autistic because they talk about a specific hobby a lot is weird (and waters down the actual definition of autism)#and its no different than saying someone has ocd bc they organize their books alpabetically#or saying someone has ADHD because they got distracted by something#and people who aren't even autistic are honestly getting way too comfortable with autism jokes
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