#then i remember she buys me flyers stuff

[unholyverse]

waterparks // rock sound 25 icon issue

(full text under cut)

ROCK SOUND 25 ICON

WATERPARKS

WATERPARKS HAVE NEVER BEEN A BAND THAT ARE HAPPY TO SIT AROUND AND WAIT FOR SOMETHING TO HAPPEN, RELEASING FIVE STUDIO ALBUMS IN THE LAST SEVEN YEARS WHILE CONTINUING TO GROW THEIR INCREASINGLY AMBITIOUS LIVE SHOWS. AS THEY ACCEPT THEIR ROCK SOUND 25 ICON AWARD, FRONTMAN AWSTEN KNIGHT TALKS US THROUGH THE BEGINNINGS OF THE BAND IN HOUSTON, TEXAS AND WHAT THE FUTURE HOLDS FOR THE TRIO.

WORDS: JAMES WILSON-TAYLOR PHOTOS: JAWN ROCHA

"NO MATTER WHAT, ALL THOSE ALL THOSE BANDS LIKE GOOD CHARLOTTE, GREEN DAY AND BLINK, THEY'RE STILL GOING TO BE IN THE BONES AND FOUNDATION OF WHAT WE'RE DOING."

Let's start at the beginning - what are your earliest musical memories?

Alright, so you can start the article with this - as I crawled out of my mother, my dad made sure the first song I ever heard was 'Wouldn't It Be Nice? by The Beach Boys. The other day somebody asked me what would be the last song I wanted to hear if I knew I was gonna die. I mean, I have death songs, don't get me wrong. I've got songs that I would choose to die to, some Death Cab and Motion City Soundtrack. But I think because I love bookends and I love like tying things together. I would have to listen to 'Wouldn't It Be Nice?'.

He took you to a lot of The Beach Boys shows when you were growing up too right?

I do remember those. It would always be on the Fourth of July. How were they always in Houston? He'd also be listening to stuff like Van Halen. My mom really liked Prince. My dad didn't like my mom's music; she liked Cat Stevens and Bob Dylan. But I remember watching TV getting dressed in the mornings, VH1 and MTV, and being so afraid of Mudvayne. They would film it at that frame rate that's the same as 28 Days Later and they had the devil makeup on. So I remember music scaring the shit out of me.

Do you remember the bands and music that you first connected with?

I heard 'Fat Lip' by Sum 41 on the radio in fourth grade. We were in my dad's Honda Civic and I was like 'What is this?' Then I saw it on TV later. Then that got me into Green Day, Good Charlotte, Blink-182. It helped that MTV actually played those things so I could find them. So that was the first stuff that I really gravitated towards in fourth, fifth, sixth grade. Then in sixth and seventh grade, that's when I started getting more into what nerds would be mad at me calling emo like My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy, From First To Last. A few years ago at my parents' house, I found these mix CDs and they had Linkin Park, Chronic Future, that song 'United States Of Whatever', Bowling For Soup. That's when I was buying stuff. Basically once I heard 'Fat Lip', I was just like, 'well, now I'm going to hear all of the songs like this'.

You were lucky to grow up at that time where this kind of music was more easy to discover because it was everywhere in pop culture. That is partly why those bands are still so influential.

I feel like no matter what, all those bands like Good Charlotte, Green Day and Blink, they're still going to be in the bones and foundation of what we're doing. I can still explore as much as I want with production and go do weird shit and try and push things forward as much as possible, because that should be your job as a musician, at least partially. But at the end of the day, the house was still built on that.

As you started playing in bands and playing shows yourself, what did you make of the local scene in Houston?

I started playing shows when I was 13. I've done my 10,000 hours. I remember when I was in seventh and eighth grade; there were some punk bands in the Houston scene that I remember seeing all the fucking time. I still have all these flyers still. But the vast majority, I'd say 85% of the bands, were mainly hardcore. That's mainly what the Houston scene was. So I remember my friends and I would just spend every day at local venues. When you're young, you absorb things better and you learn more. I think that's why when kids start piano when they're three, they can be prodigies, you know what I mean? But I feel like I got that with music that ultimately wouldn't help me very much in the future. I could still list 100 bands from Houston that those people have probably forgotten that they were in by this point. But we would just hang out and if a local band somehow didn't pull through, they would let us go take their spot. I was probably in eight different bands over the course of like three or four years. Whoever I was with, we would just go play the shows. We'd make some songs up, we played covers sometimes. We covered The Used and Motion City Soundtrack, Scary Kids Scaring Kids.

Your first couple of Waterparks' EPs were self- made and self-released, keeping in that DIY spirit. Yet it still felt like you were ambitious and aiming high even back then.

Can I tell you the difference between then and now? See, I don't advertise this information but I don't even listen to that much music now. I'm trying to be better about that and I've got certain friends that will give me stuff to immerse myself. But I've gotten maybe a little bit frustrated. There's so many times where I keep finding cool people on Tik Tok when I finally do go looking for new music, and I'll talk to them for a second and maybe see if they wanna open up for us on tour but they can't because so many fucking people are just quiet signed to major labels. It irritates the shit out of me and the reason they're hiding it is because everybody is so obsessed with authenticity, which they have the right to be, you want your shit to be organic, homegrown, free range, cruelty free, all that shit. But everything that I look at is just a fucking marketing trick or ploy. What is the equivalent of me just being in my fucking room at my parents' house?

"I FEEL MORE LOOSE AND I FEEL LIKE EVERY TOUR I GET BETTER AS A SINGER."

In terms of your attitude back then, you were just treating those self-releases as if you were already on a major label. It didn't feel less legit to you.

Day and night, you're working on those things. It was very real. We're about to get to the point of this conversation where we start trying to quantify success and what it means and it's intangible, we can't do it. But what I do know is you can easily get tricked and be like, 'Oh, my Tik Toks are getting millions of hits' and then draw 20 people to your show. I've seen it happen. So I just care how many people ride with you and will leave their home to come see you play. I don't care how many fucking playlists you bought, I don't care how many ads you run on your Spotify, I don't care if YouTube picked you up on their fucking algorithm - good for you because they've never done that for us - but I want to know how many people fuck with you.

With your own live show, when did you feel like it clicked for Geoff, Otto and yourself? When did you first feel like you understood what a Waterparks show should be?

Maybe 'Fandom'. I didn't start taking vocal lessons till 2021. I feel like that's the first time where I look back and it's not just us playing a song and then stopping and then playing the song and then stopping. It's where we actually built a show. That's when we had 'Double Dare 2019' and 'Entertainment 2019' where we were playing for eight minutes straight and made me feel like fucking Green Day. Like some like 'Jesus of Suburbia', 'Bullet In A Bible' type shit. That's not me saying I thought we sucked during 'Entertainment'. That's not what it is at all. We did cool shit. We did Reading & Leeds main stage on 'Entertainment'. But I just feel like things clicked more on 'Fandom'. I feel so much more comfortable onstage every single tour. I feel more loose and I feel like every tour I get better as a singer. I better not get fucking worse. As long as you're continuing to practice and improve. I need to go fucking play tennis and boxing and all this other shit to be at my best when we're touring, you know what I mean? As long as I'm not fully just lounging and then going straight to the stage, I should, in theory, be a better performer.

You mentioned Reading & Leeds, which was one of many milestone moments you've had in the UK. How do you reflect on your relationship with the fans over here?

I give the UK a lot of shit for their food and everything but truthfully, those are my favourite shows in the world. They've always given us the most love and I just feel like the UK appreciates bands more. You know what I mean? I wonder if it's because the BBC still plays guitars? Or maybe they just care about rock culture more.

So to jump back a little, when you were making 'Double Dare', what aims did you have? What was on your to-do list around that time?

I could tell you the list. A big bucket list. I don't erase things when I complete them, I just add on. (Looking through his computer) Let's see…I can tell you one of the things it says here is 'A Rock Sound cover'. I tried to fill it out as much as I could with the knowledge that I had because sometimes you don't know what goals you can ask for. You know what I mean? I put 'Have a Top 10 album' and then you get to mark that off. 'Headline Reading and Leeds', not marked off. 'Have a music video on TV. Get shirts in Hot Topic. Play a show with Kesha. Get an apartment. Get a music video with 100K views. Record an album.' I got to mark that one off. There's a ton. I think when you're making that, you also have to look big. You have to project and manifest big shit. When I was in my parents' house thinking about 'Crave' with $0 to my name, I was thinking about playing that in arenas. We hadn't played a show to more than 500 people at that point. So yeah, I think it's always just pretending you're Coldplay. That kind of doesn't change. I mean, I guess until you become Coldplay, and then you're like 'how do we be as big as God?'

“AT A CERTAIN POINT, THERE ARE THINGS THAT YOU DEAL WITH THAT THERAPISTS DON'T UNDERSTAND. SOMETIMES IT'S HARD TO ACCEPT THOSE THINGS."

You've been very fortunate to have some mentors help guide you towards those goals with Joel and Benji Madden and Mikey Way all there to give advice from early on.

So as we said earlier, we didn't have anyone in our corner when we were doing 'Airplane Conversations', 'Black Light' and writing 'Cluster'. Nobody was around; it was just us at home. Joel and Benji both reached out quickly after the other. They were the first people to ever give us the good shit. 'Hey, we see what you're doing. It's cool'. They were the first established people to ever reach out and give us props. I was babysitting and our fucking first label we had just signed with was like, 'Hey, what are you doing tomorrow?' I'm like, 'Oh, just probably babysitting, teaching guitar lessons'. And they're like, 'Well, do you want to come to Los Angeles and have lunch with Benji and Joel?' Then I'm hitting up Geoff and Otto and we come out and we talked about our goals. Fast-forward, they're like 'You want to do some co-writes?' I wanted to be a team player about it because back then especially, I was like 'nobody touches our shit, we don't get help from anybody, we are DIY'. I was so fucking close-minded punk about it. But when they heard all the demos, they went 'Oh, wait, you already have all these. Do you want to use these?' So that's 'Cluster'. That's when Mikey came through and was listening to us. He was always just so nice. He's like 'I'd love to play on it'. So I'm sitting there showing him the bass parts, and he's getting it fucking immediately. It was so weird. I felt like I could be arrested any second and just immediately sound like a crazy person. 'No, no, no, I was talking to My Chemical Romance and Good Charlotte's my friend'. At a certain point, there are things that you deal with that therapists don't understand. Sometimes it's hard to accept those things. Let's say I'm on a tour, which is already a scary thing. You're in a van, you're not fucking sleeping. You have no fucking money. Part of your team is trying to go back on the already shitty contract you have and you're getting fucking cheated on and you're doing just a bunch of crazy shit. You can't call a therapist for that shit. So I would talk to them, especially Joel. I would save those conversations, because I would have to go back to them so much. His time is valuable. It's almost like a cheat sheet in a way. It doesn't perfectly tie up all those bad things but those are probably the best answers I'm gonna get.

Let's talk about playing Warped Tour. You did it a few times in those early years and it must have been a pretty good learning process on how to grow your fanbase.

All 2016 we toured on 'Cluster'. 'Stupid For You' didn't come out until November that year. The reason I think I'm so good at marketing is because I had to do fucking all of it for four years straight. I was talking to somebody about this the other day where they were like, 'Oh man, if you guys ever opened for Taking Back Sunday, you'd fucking kill it. You'd get so many fans'. No, we wouldn't. And I can say this confidently, because I've promoted outside of three of their shows and I can tell you, those people did not like us. There's always the exception that proves the rule, but for the most part, I can tell you where we will and will not thrive because I've promoted to every fucking fan base. So Warped wasn't really different. Based on what shirts they were wearing at barricade or certain age ranges; I have a good meter of who will fuck with it and who will not. A Sleeping With Sirens fan would fucking love us, a Bayside fan would fucking hate us. You get what I mean? Paramore fans would fucking love us. An Alkaline Trio fan would fucking hate us. But the thing is, at Warped, you're kind of forced to exercise that muscle because all of those people are walking by. I wasn't shy on stage or anything but I think that could be one of the reasons I'm really good at crowd work. There's been a lot of bands we've toured with who say 'I don't know how you just talk to them for fucking five minutes between songs about different shit every night'. I don't know how you don't.

"IF IT'S NOT GOING UP AND GETTING BIGGER AND BETTER, I DON'T REALLY WANT TO DO IT."

Once you got to 'Fandom' and 'Greatest Hits', you were far more comfortable with experimenting musically and on the production side too. Did you feel a change in your confidence levels when you reached that era?

Confidence wise, yeah, but I think I'm too close to really see how big of a difference there is on certain things. I always wanted to be able to do 'Fandom' and even on the first EP with songs like 'Fantastic' or 'Silver', we are adding a weird synthy thing or vocal cuts. I was trying to explain that to this kid in the garage in the middle of fucking redneck nowhere woods, Texas. He just cut the voice and I'm like 'pitch it up and drag this one there'. Or bringing a weird, syncopated piano thing into the outro. I tried to make sure of that early on because I've always been such a fan of so many things. I just wanted that to come across even on album one. 'Crave' was a fully electronic thing, 'Territory' I wanted that to be an indie kind of vibe and then 'Mad All The Time' I wanted to be more industrial, kind of like Linkin Park with those weird, major melodies. 'Take Her To The Moon', full fucking pop song then throw 'Dizzy' in there with cut up shit and trappy drums. Then album two, we're gonna go fucking hard as hell with it on 'Tantrum'. I always felt like we were doing these things. But then I heard those albums the way I hear demos, where I think I hear kind of what they are in my head, what they could or should be. I remember when I showed the 'Fruit Roll Ups' demo to Travis (M. Riddle). He didn't really like it that much. It had all the same parts, all the same chords, vocals, the synth outro and the solo and all this stuff. But then when he heard the final one, where I went in with Zakk (Cervini, producer), and we beefed it up and added more stuff, he was like 'I love this one now so much'. But it's the same song. So when those first albums aren't seen as eclectic as the albums starting at 'Fandom', it would confuse me because I always felt like things were diverse. It really might just come down to the production.

One thing that certainly did change was how open you were in your lyrics. They were always honest but now they became a lot more specific over time.

Pete Wentz is my favourite lyricist and I love things just sounding as pretty as possible, trying to word things that people feel but in ways that they've never heard it described. You take a feeling like love, something that everybody fucking knows, and then just say it in a way with a combination of words that nobody has used yet. That was the goal for so long, but then I remember something kind of clicking when I was so mad and made 'Tantrum'. There was something that felt so much more cathartic. It actually gave me adrenaline and I wanted to chase that. That felt so good. There were certain songs like 'Reboot' or this demo called 'Play'. I wouldn't let a song go if it didn't give me chills. Certain lines like 'you're gonna be just like your mother', that's gonna make someone in real life so mad. So I think that's where that came from. Then songs like 'Turbulent' happened - 'you had your own Pete Wentz and Patrick combined' - and that's the start of the song. Are you kidding me? Who in the music sphere is going to hear that and not have some kind of reaction? And I just wanted a reaction. I could start 'Sleep Alone' and it doesn't have to elicit the same thing, but something as strong. They shouldn't elicit the same exact feeling, but they should elicit that dynamic level of emotional response.

“IF WE NEVER GET TO DO THIS AGAIN, I WANT TO GIVE THEM THE COOLEST SHIT POSSIBLE WHILE WE GET TO BE IN THIS SPOT."

As you mentioned earlier, it is hard to quantify success. A good example is the way 'I Miss Having Sex But At Least I Don't Wanna Die Anymore' became your most streamed song, largely due to a TikTok trend you had very little to do with.

I didn't even know it was happening. Now, there's so many viral songs that the cycle is quicker. Somebody can have a song that bangs on Tik Tok for two weeks and then it's done. But this was so early on. It wasn't a single; it was a deep cut song on the album. It still doesn't have a music video. Neither does 'Turbulent'. It's just so odd because it also makes you a little mad. But then it's also a little humbling in a way. Things are out of your control, but they'll be okay.

You are still touring your most recent album 'Intellectual Property' so it is probably too early to fully analyze it but, now that we are nearly a year on from its release, how are you reflecting on what you achieved with that record?

I've told you this before but if it's not going up and getting bigger and better, I don't really want to do it. I don't want to spin the tyres in fucking mud. If it's not happening, then I'm not gonna do the trap where things start downgrading and we have to play old albums. It's not what I want. I'm good enough at other things to figure something out but preserve that legacy. But 'Intellectual Property' charted higher than any of our fucking other albums, first Top 10 in the UK. We've sold more tickets to the 'Property' tour than the 'Fandom' tour and the 'See You In The Future' tour combined. I'll say that one more time - we sold more tickets to the 'Property' tour than the entire 'Fandom' tour and the entire 'Greatest Hits' tour if you put them both together and add them up. That's the indicator to me. That's what matters to me. I did say at the top of the cycle in such a simple way that I want one of the red songs above the green songs. That's literally what I told Fueled By Ramen. So that didn't happen because the Tik Tok lords did not mysteriously bless us in our sleep. We still sold more. We got more real people in real seats. More was accomplished and it was bigger and better.

It feels like you have the same aim with each tour too - growing and building on what came before. Yet, again, you have always had those bigger ambitions for the show even when you were in slightly smaller rooms.

Dress for the job you want. With all the rooms we did on the 'Property' tour, they're the same ones that we would do for 'Greatest Hits', right? So it's like, okay, we did it. We conquered those rooms. Now we have to move up. Shit. Because otherwise, you just keep doing victory laps forever in the same rooms. So some of them, there's no fucking chance in hell we're gonna sell these out. But it's cool to try. And the thing is, it's still selling on par with the 'Property' tour. Part of me is like, damn, I wish we could have as many sold out things but there are already more people going to this show than the previous sold out one. So I pick my battles. Yeah, you could go play to 1300 people in New York again or you could try and do the fucking big ass thing. So that's kind of where it's at now. You want to build a fucking real show. On the 'Property' tour, we actually got to build shit for the first time. We built a set and this time it is just a bigger version of that. It's just bigger and with more changes. It's not even a spoiler because that's so fucking vague, but to have the show and set change as the set goes on, it's fucking cool. Sometimes I see people who are doing these same size rooms (so this isn't remotely punching down, we're doing the same rooms) and they'll just have a banner. Give them more. Give them a show. I'm so grateful to actually get to be in these rooms finally that if we never get to do this again, I want to give them the coolest shit possible while we get to be in this spot.

"NO PART OF ME IS INTERESTED IN JUST REPEATING THE CYCLE OVER AND OVER AND OVER."

Speaking of bigger shows, you got to play in arenas for the first time when you supported My Chemical Romance. Given what a huge fan you are of that band, it must have felt quite surreal.

Dude, it was so weird and so cool. Every night, the first song scared the shit out of me and then you kind of get the rhythm of it. It's just so weird. Sometimes between songs, I just had to look and take a mental picture. I saw My Chem when I was younger in an arena and I could see the seats I was in, you know what I mean? I could see people in them. You get to a certain point where stuff doesn't blow your mind as much but that blew my fucking mind every day. I remember the first time we ever got to go in a bus. It was so exciting. Now, when I get in the bus, I'm like, 'Okay, but where's the charger in the bunk? Where's the air? Is it just gonna freeze my feet?' It's not to say I'm ungrateful it just becomes more normal. If you go to the best pizza spot every day, after years of having it, it's just a good pizza spot. But getting to go open for My Chem and everything around it and all the details of it, I just never got used to. We'd go to the catering room and we'd sit down and there's Frank and there's Ray. We were in this hockey arena in the locker room and I had all my outfits, planning them out, and at one point, Gerard came through. I was showing him the fits and everything and he was like, 'Oh, you have great style'. I don't think you can get used to that. It's crazy. Maybe My Chem is used to it because they've been playing arenas for years and years and years, maybe that's the standard now. But God, that blew my fucking mind every day.

As you start to think about wrapping up this era, what are the goals as you move forward?

I just want to go places that we haven't been because that's what makes me feel excited. Like with playing in an arena for the first time, anything that is a huge dynamic change. That's all I'm looking for. I just want to feel excited. The people who like us, I appreciate them because we're so lucky enough to be in a place where we don't have to tour into the fucking ground if we don't want to just to survive. No part of me is interested in touring into the ground this year. I feel like we've been on tour for the last two and a half years straight. 2022 was preparing for this album, 2023 was promoting this album. One thing I enjoyed about 2019 was that we only did a short opening run, early in the year, and then we did the 'Fandom' tour at the end of the year. But that whole spring, summer and fall, we were just making cool shit. That made me feel excited. We made so many music videos and just did a lot of cool shit. We got to focus on the creative. I never would have been throwing around Sunny D in my apartment bathroom taking pictures of it for the 'Fandom' album cover if I had jetlag. No part of me is interested in just repeating the cycle over and over and over. I want to just do things that we haven't done yet and make stuff for everyone. Because if we go play in Copenhagen, Waterparks is for Copenhagen that day. But when I'm home and we're operating at full mental capacity and everything, we can make things for everybody. At the end of the day, I never want to fall into a pattern and repeat myself and do the same shit. I want to expand and see what we can do, what our capabilities are like. Do something that somebody hasn't done yet. I want to rent a movie theatre and do a fucking real premiere. I don't want to give a bunch of shit away but there's a lot of things that are always in the works. As Awsten, the guy steering the ship on fucking Waterparks, whatever's going on I just want it to be new and cool and feel fulfilling. If we had some fucking tyrant label that was like 'We need an album now' I could go 'There's fucking 100 songs on here. Go fucking make your album, pick them. Go have Zakk mix them'. But it's just not what intuitively feels right and I want to follow that intuition. I keep looking back at the 2019 year map as kind of a blueprint. That's not to say I'm gonna stay home all year. But it's just gotta be new. I want that feeling of getting in the bus for the first time.

[brighter-by-the-daly]

Rachel Daly x Reader

Part Nineteen - Surrounded

You’d never been on such a long flight before, Florida had been the furthest you’ve traveled but that was when you were young and barely within memory. A feeling of dread sunk into you the night before - over 30 hours of travelling in a flying tin tube can do that to a person. The thought of exciting spontaneity had drifted away in the early hours of the morning and had been replaced with stomach churning anxiety. Unable to sleep as Rach snored loudly next to you, the more she breathed the more you were getting frustrated; knowing that if you’re not well slept you get grumpy and that’s the last impression you want to make in front of everyone.. although you’re sure that you won’t be the only nervous flyer on the plane tomorrow, well today seeing as it’s 2am now. Putting up with Rachel’s snoring was getting hard to bare, every breath was a reminder that she was asleep and you were not. You’re used to falling asleep first and being a deep sleeper the snoring never usually bothers you but tonight it felt like world war three was boiling up in your stomach. In a desperate attempt not to project your frustrations onto your girlfriend you decided to get up and run on the treadmill for a while - you’d been working out a lot more now there’s a gym in the house. You ran until your body felt tired then had a warm shower but that was a mistake as it only woke you up again. Moving into the lounge where your suitcases were waiting you sat and stared at them for a while until something took over your body and made you pull everything out of them. Convinced you’d forgotten something and your mind beyond able to listen to reasoning made your arms frantically unpack everything you’d squeezed in, albeit most of the stuff probably unnecessary. The words of your girlfriend “if we forget something, we can just buy it” far off in the distance. You’re not used to having spare money to spend on stuff needlessly, if you have it already it’s coming. Unfortunately half way through packing everything back into it’s place, you fell asleep.

Awakening to a slight shake of your body you opened one eye to see Rach staring down at you from above “what’s happened here then?” her soft morning voice broke the silence. Grunting in realisation you’d fallen asleep surrounded by your belongings and were using them as a blanket, you wedged your eyes shut determined to get more zzz’s. “I couldn’t sleep” you mumbled trying to force her to stop talking and leave you alone. “What’s the time?” you asked hoping beyond anything that you’d at least got a few hours but when Rach said it was 6am you could not control your disappointment that she’d woken you up. “Just leave me, I’ll tidy this up later” pulling a pair of shorts over your eyes to block out the sun. “I’m not leaving you in the middle of the floor (y/n/n), come on” Rach bent down and scooped your tired body into her arms to carry you upstairs, laying you gently on the bed she sat with you for a while stroking your hair until you fell back to sleep.

Rachel’s morning hadn’t started quite the way she’d expected it to, making herself a cuppa tea and sitting cross legged on the floor to pack up your suitcase again. She wasn’t angry, she knew this was out of the ordinary for you and had wondered when the anxiety was going to kick in. A few hours passed when she heard you stirring so flicked the kettle on then crawled back into bed with you. “Are you okay baby?” she asked as her arms wrapped around your body making you the little spoon. “How did I get here?” your voice croaky and your eyes still shut but comforted by your lady’s hold on you. “You don’t remember?” with a shake of your head Rachel filled you in on your early morning antics. Groaning in annoyance at yourself that you’ve now go to pack your entire suitcase again, something you’ve done every day for the past two weeks. “Don’t worry darlin’, I’ve sorted it” she kissed your cheek “you didn’t have to do that doll” shuffling around so you were facing her, eyes squinting from the light coming through the curtains. “I know how big of a thing this is for you, I just wish you’d have woken me up” she said gazing into your tired eyes. You laughed softly to yourself remembering how mad you were at Rachel’s snoring and told her that. “I’m dreading this flight Rach” pushing your face into her chest so your words were barely audible. You don’t like admitting when you’re scared but a worry shared and all that. “Hey it could be worse, you could be on a public plane! You’ve always wanted to go to Australia, you’ve got me and Millie and all the others, I’m sure Mary will keep you busy with TikToks! All the snacks you could want, leg room for miles, beds; we’re gonna have a great time. You won’t even realise we’ll be flying for so long. And we stop off for a whole day in Dubai, have you ever been there?” Shaking your head with mild amusement, “do I look like the type of person that’s ever been to Dubai before?” your eyebrow raised in an unsurprising fashion. “Well, we get to have an adventure there too! Another magnet for your mum’s fridge!” she smiled squeezing you tightly. Rach always knew what to say - never called you silly or your feelings stupid, always validated your emotions and made them feel normal. Rachel was the most supportive person you’d ever had in your life, never questioning or demeaning and you were starting to realise what a healthy relationship truly was.

Gathering at SGP you were greeted excitedly by some of the others, Millie and Mary came bounding over to see you both the second they noticed your car pull up. Jordan came over with her arms out shouting “look who’s here!” The days of watching Villa together on the sidelines while she was injured ran through your mind. She’d talked about her worries about making the team and you were so happy to see her here. “I’m so proud of you!!” screaming as you scooped her up, “I told you you’d do it!” Soon it was 5pm and everyone boarded the coach which included a lot of karaoke that you were urged to join in with. Checking in at the airport made everything suddenly seem real, the nerves were starting to set in and it wasn’t going unnoticed. The girls linked your arms and lead you on board the flight - Rach in the middle and you and Mill either side of her. The plane was like nothing you’d ever seen before, there were even cabins with beds at the front! Food was served and you watched films together, they then entertained themselves by interviewing you on how it felt to be on your way to your first ever World Cup. After they both fell asleep you listened to music before trying to get some shut eye yourself until the lights came back on. You’ve never been able to sleep on flights but you had never been on a private plane with so much room before so you quickly drifted off and stayed that way for hours.

Part 20 - On Top of the World

[winter-leftovers]

Til The End Of Eternity || Chapter Four: To Catch a Changeling (4/?)

(Douxie Casperan x f!reader)

Summary: Y/n is trying to figure her life out but is going to be hard since her brother is the new trollhunter and she is plagued by dreams and feelings she doesn’t understand.

Chapter Summary: Y/n visit Douxie’s library

Word count: 1902

Warnings: no!

(Season 1 Episode 7)

Song?: Crush by Tessa Violet

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Masterlist

“You look like shit” Randy hit the counter with some papers distracting Y/n from her computer.

“I feel like shit” Y/n closed the seventeen tabs she had opened looking for information about Killahead, all useless “I haven’t been sleeping well”

They shared a look for awhile. Y/n rolled her eyes. She knew her coworker very well by now. There was only one reason why he didn’t interrogated about her sleeping schedule: he needed something

“What do you want, Randy?” Y/n looked back at the computer, a picture of a rat eating a fry stared back at her.

“Okay, remember my idea of a battle of bands?” He didn’t give her time to answer “Well, I need to help to set it up and I know you are a musical genius so your input would be much appreciated and I won’t be able to do it without you…”

“Aha” She cut him off “Would I get paid?” She raised a brow.

“Yes! And…and the free afternoon right now so you can sleep”

“Wow! you really want me to help” she started to pick up her stuff before he could change his mind.

“Great! Thank you! Here, have flyer”

She took the piece of paper. The colorful flyer made her smile.

Randy always loved music. She remembered when his mother told her the story of how Randy had threatened to steal a guitar if she didn’t buy him one. Music was everything to him and he saw the same emotion in Y/n when they met. She always loved music, even before she could remember.

When she was six, Barbara took her to school for the first time and there, on music class, she touched a guitar for the first time and it felt like coming home.

Y/n doesn’t remember her biological parents but as a kid she liked to think that they loved music as much as she did but, as she grew, she stopped thinking about her biological parents and at seventeen she stopped playing completely until last year. Three months into college she got lost, hopeless. She didn’t like what she was studying and didn’t know what she wanted to do. One weekend, while visiting her family, Y/n heard a piano. Someone was trying to tune a piano and awfully failing. She felt like the strings were calling for her, asking her to end its misery.

Entering the music store she had spent too many hours browsing back in high school she saw two guys not much older than her debating if that is how the key was supposed to sound.

“It’s really not” Y/n got close to inspect their work.

“Hello? You need help looking for something?” The man with the long blonde hair asked.

“You’re doing a shitty job” she pointed to the man with his finger in the key.

“No shit. I don’t know I’m doing” he laughed.

She looked back and forth between them.

‘Maybe I can make a quick buck’ she thought.

“How much for tuning it?” She crossed her arms.

The blonde man looked at his watch and back to his friend and said:

“I’ll give you twenty bucks to tune it in half an hour”

Y/n laughed

“It can take up to two hours to tune it after god knows what you did”

“Hour and a half for thirty bucks”

“Forty five minutes and sixty dollars” she stretched her hand.

“Fifty”

“Deal” They shook hands.

She took her jacket off and started to work.

“I’m Y/n”

“Randy” the blonde said.

Tuning the piano made her feel something she thought lost, the feeling of home and she’ll always be grateful to Randy for that.

“Hello, Y/n”

“Hey, Douxie! How are you?”

“I’m fine. How about you?” He looked concerned.

Y/n knew she wasn’t looking her best. No one would be after the night she had.

“Oh, this awful eye bags? Courtesy of my little brother” she laughed.

“I didn’t know you had a brother”

“Yeah, he is still in high school. How about you? Got any siblings?”

“Nah, it’s just me and Archie” he point to the window of the library where a black cat was grooming himself.

“Oooh he is so cute” Y/n crouched down in front of the window.

Archie meowed and rubbed himself on the window as a response, melting Y/n’s heart.

“Don’t feed his ego too much. He’s a total diva”

Y/n laughed “I thought the guy with groupies would be the diva”

Douxie blushed.

She chuckled. She thought guys like Douxie didn’t blush.

“Are you jealous, love?”

Now it was Y/n’s time to blush.

They stood there, smiling at each other. Y/n found Douxie so intoxicating: his hazel eyes, his blue hair, that smile that brought her down to her knees. Even though they saw each other a few times, she was enchanted by him the first time.

“Would you like to say hi to him…you know…without the glass” Douxie broke the silence. He seemed nervous.

“That would be nice” she smiled.

Douxie opened the door to the library, the smell of books, tea and something else filled her lungs making her warm inside.

The moment she stepped inside, Archie rubbed himself between Y/n legs, stealing her attention from the beautiful library.

“Hello, sweet boy” she sat on the floor to pet Archie more comfortably.

“He likes you” said Douxie. He was leaning against one of the few walls that wasn’t covered in books “He isn’t usually that nice, you know”

Y/n swears she saw Archie roll his eyes but assumed her tiredness was playing tricks with her.

“He seems super nice to me” she rubbed Archie’s cheek and he let himself fall onto her hand.

“Oh, don’t let him trick you. He has a temper”

They both laughed and shared a look. The power Douxie has on her made her crazy. Ever since the day they met at Benoit’s, she couldn’t stop thinking about him. Every time she saw him she would stare at him like if she moved her eyes he would disappear.

“Battle of the bands? Are you entering the contest?” Douxie pointed to the flyer long forgotten on the floor.

“No, I’m just helping set it up. Are you interested?”

“Yes, I have a band…”

“Oh! Ash dispersal pattern, right? Randy is a big fan” she tried to play it cool. She couldn’t tell him that she knows most of his songs by heart “I heard some of your songs. You’re good”

She saw a red tint in his cheeks and this time, she was sure her tired brain wasn’t playing tricks on her.

“Thank you” he scratched the back of his neck “I heard you play the piano you have at the store. I thought you’ll enter”

“Mmmh, I’ve played since I’m kid but I don’t think I’m good enough to enter. I’m helping cuz Randy asked” she looked at Archie, he was belly up between her legs, napping.

“What?! I heard you at the store! You’re nuclear!” Douxie crouched next to her.

Y/n turned her head and looked at him “You think?”

With Douxie so close the world seemed to slow down. They were the only people in the world. Their faces just inches apart. So close that a small breeze could change everything.

“Of course” He smiled

The door opened and the world was no longer theirs. Douxie stood as fast as he could and assisted the customer.

Y/n looked down at Archie, who was already looking at her and smiled. Her face was so hot that she thought it would explode.

She yawned and Archie mirrored, the last of her energy left with Douxie.

“Sorry, Archie but I have to go” she stood up and petted his head one last time “Maybe I’ll see you later. Tell Douxie I said goodbye”

—

Y/n fell on her bed like a bag of sand. Her body gave into sleep before she could take her shoes off.

When she opened her eyes, she was in a forest. Civilisation was nowhere to be seen. The air smelled fresh, familiar.

She kneeled in one of the trees and saw a heart with H written inside. A smile erupted from her chest. She mindlessly caressed the indentation, trying to remember something, someone, but she just couldn’t reach it. Only finding a warmth feeling in her chest.

“Y/n! Where are you?” A man’s raspy voice distracted from the tree “Come home, little bird”

A sword made of sadness and forge by loneliness stabbed her chest. Her eyes filled with tears.

“I don’t know where I am” she whispered as a tear fell down her face, burgundy streaks of light surrounded her. Electricity ran through her body burning her fingertips and heart.

She looked at her hands, they were surrounded by red smoke.

Y/n woke up covered in sweat, her heart was racing but she felt fully rested. She looked at her hands and when she saw no red smoke, she relaxed.

Outside the sun had already set. She looked through her phone to see if her brother or mom had sent a text. Jim sent her a text telling her about her study date with Claire. She smiled. Jim had a crush on this girl from his class for a while now and apparently it was going somewhere. She wished him luck even if hours had passed. When she went to answer a text from Randy Toby called.

She couldn’t understand what he was saying, only the words: changeling and dental hygienist.

“Ok, Tobes I’m on my way”

Y/n jumped out of bed and drove as fast as she could to Dr. Muelas office. She would probably get a lot of tickets but she didn’t care. Knowing what she knows now, she couldn’t risk disregarding a call from Jim or Toby.

“Toby? Jim?” She screamed as she followed the sound of struggle.

She got to the door and saw her brother stabbing a troll followed by a flashing blue light.

“There goes proof” said Aaaargh!.

“Oh, my gosh! She’s in my mouth!” Toby coughed. The troll’s ashes were everywhere.

Y/n couldn’t move.

“Oh no! I killed our only evidence of a changeling in Arcadia” Jim pulled his armour off.

“And my dental hygienist” Toby screamed.

Y/n laughed. Toby could make her laugh even on her worst days.

“You finished the fight, Master Jim, and in self defense, for that matter. Vendel may continue to have his doubts but we continue to have our lives. A fair bargain, I’d say” Blinky tried to comfort him.

“He’s right, Jim” Y/n grabbed his brother by the shoulders trying to make sure her eyes didn’t deceive her and he was ok.

“Y/n? What are you doing here?”

“Toby called”

“And just out of curiosity, what are you doing in Toby’s dentist office?” Jim looked at the trolls.

“I thought it was possible that danger may come to either of you should you cross paths with the wrong changeling. So, we followed Tobias as a precaution” explained Blinky

Aaaargh! Fell from the ceiling making Y/n jump.

Blinky started talking about how he was curious about human’s oral hygiene but Y/n didn’t listen. She was more worried about dusting the troll off her brother before getting to her car.

A/n: 👀

[giv3crowleyhiswings]

My grandma keeps sending me pictures/videos from her seats at tonight’s game...she’s a jerk

@patty-wagon-nols

@fratboynolanpatrick

(Thought you might like this...)

Edit: She is now sending me videos from where she is standing outside of their locker room, and I feel attacked.

[davidpastrsnack]

it’s crazy what you’ll do for a friend - nolan patrick

a/n: here’s a friends to lovers 4+1 with our fav boy loosely inspired by daddy issues by the neighbourhood. but there’s still a splash of smut because you know me lol. hope you enjoy :)

word count: 10.5k

The first time you met Nolan you didn’t know what to think. He was polite, giving you a gentle smile and reaching out to shake your hand, but you couldn’t help but fixate on how quiet he was and his seeming lack of emotion.

Regardless of your hesitation, that was the first time of many that Nolan took care of you. 

You were new to Philadelphia, moving to continue your education and expand your horizons. You had always been one to play it safe, to stay in your comfort zone, but after having your heart broken and being unexpectedly accepted to one of the top graduate programs in your field you knew it was time to challenge yourself and leave behind everything you had ever known.

Well, almost everything, aside from Aubrey, one of your best friends since that first day of kindergarten so long ago. She worked in the city, practically begging you to join her when she found out you were considering the move. Just weeks later, the second bedroom in her apartment became yours and that’s how you met him.

~

one

It was only your third night in Philly and you were still unpacking, a glass of wine sitting on your dresser as you dug through the remaining boxes that were seemingly never-ending. It didn’t seem like this much stuff when you were packing it, but here you were overwhelmed with all of your belongings.

You were humming along to the music, taking it one box at a time as the room slowly came together when you heard a knock on your door.

“Come in,” you called, turning to face the door.

“Woah,” Aubrey muttered, “How’s it going in here?”

“I know, I know,” you laughed, “It looks bad but I’m almost there.”

She nodded, stepping into the room and sitting on your bed, “Time for a break?”

You knew what the hopeful smile on her face meant, she had plans for the two of you.

You looked at her with hesitant eyes and she chuckled, remembering how well you knew her.

“I was thinking we could go meet some of my friends?” Aubrey continued, “I’m kind of seeing this one guy and his friends are great. They’re a lot but I think you’ll love them and they’ll love you.”

“Aubrey, I-” You paused, “I really should finish up in here.”

“Come on, Y/N, we have all day tomorrow to finish and you need a break. I feel like I’ve barely even seen you and it’s been three days.”

You let out a laugh at her words, she was right. It felt like your life had been on hold for so long but now you had the opportunity to start fresh, to put yourself out there in a world that had no existing opinions of you.

“Fine,” you groaned, standing up from your spot on the hardwood, “But you have to help me find something to wear.”

“Deal!” Aubrey exclaimed, dragging you out of the room and into her own to go through her closet.

Just over an hour later, you were squeezed into a booth of the bar surrounded by men almost twice your size. Aubrey failed to mention that the guy she was seeing, but not dating as she vehemently claimed, was a Flyer and so were his friends.

You didn’t know what to expect from the group, but it didn’t take long for you to conclude that they were sweethearts, especially Travis, Aubrey’s “friend.” After introducing you to each of them, it felt like you had always been a part of the gang.

The beer and conversation were flowing, the bellowing laughs coming from the table practically feeling the air of the entire bar. You quickly fell into the banter, fitting in right away after growing up with brothers.

“There he is!” You suddenly heard Kevin shout from next to you, “Took you long enough, Patty.”

You looked up from your drink to see the man you could only assume to be Patty, his tall frame towering over you as you sat on the edge of the booth. He was dressed in all black, and his hair was long and frankly, unkempt as it curled around his ears. Even in the dim light of the bar, you could make out his light eyes, the blue piercing you as he finally met your gaze from his seat directly across from yours.

“Nolan, this is my friend Y/N,” Aubrey started, “She just moved in with me.”

Nolan reached out his hand across the table which you happily met, secretly hoping he couldn’t feel how clammy you had gotten since he walked in. He softly smiled as your hands touched, the corners of his mouth barely lifting but just enough.

“Nice to meet you,” he mumbled.

“You too,” you replied, flickering your eyes to the other end of the table before you caught yourself staring.

You were right away distracted by something Travis was chirping Claude for from this morning’s practice, but something about the man sitting just a few feet away from you was still consuming your thoughts.

You were pretty sure he had already decided that he didn’t like you. He had barely said a word aside from his initial pleasantries, but from then on it was almost like he wasn’t even acknowledging your presence. You didn’t know why you even cared, but there was something about his presence that made you on edge.

“I’m going to get another one,” you blurted out, everyone’s attention shifting to you.

“I’ll come with,” Aubrey declared.

“I’m good, stay,” you responded, giving her a knowing look. She was practically sitting in Travis’s lap, her hands wrapped around his neck while his eyes were stuck on her like she was the only one in the room. Not dating, my ass, you thought to yourself.

You slid off the cushion and headed towards the bar, the air already feeling lighter the further away from the group you got. You loved them, they were great, but it was just so much new at once. You needed a breather.

It was a packed Friday night and you knew it would be a while before you got your drink, so you sat down on the first available stool you saw. You caught the bartender's attention right away, but she was clearly swamped. You sent her a reassuring nod, telling her to take her time. She smiled right back at you, evidently grateful for your patience.

After what felt like barely a minute of waiting, you felt a body slide next to yours, the scent of cheap cologne overwhelming you as you braced yourself for what was about to happen.

“Hi there,” he spoke, leaning his weight against the bar top as he boxed you in.

“Hi,” you sighed. To put it simply, you were not in the mood.

“You got a name?”

“I do,” you chuckled in disbelief, turning your body away from his as your eyes scanned the room for anyone familiar. Which of course there wasn’t.

“A snappy one, alright,” he spoke, his hot breath fanning over your neck, “Well I’m Brett, what are you drinking?”

“Nothing,” you snapped.

“Oh c’mon, let me buy you a drink,” he continued, either not picking up on your hints or purposely ignoring them.

“I’m really all set.”

Just before he was about to open his mouth to speak once again, you felt his hand rest flat against your back, your body arching away from him immediately at the contact.

“Do not fucking touch her.”

The deep voice echoed in front of you, your vision clouded as your mind raced in a million directions.

“Listen, man, I got this.”

“No, I don’t think you do,” you heard, the vibrations of his voice running straight through your body.

Nolan.

You may have just met him, but that was a body and voice you couldn’t forget.

You had no idea what overcame you, but before you could process what you were doing you wrapped your arms around his torso. Nolan immediately reciprocated, his arm falling across your shoulders and pulling you close to his frame.  

“Just leave,” Nolan asserted, “Don’t make this more difficult than it has to be. It’s already embarrassing enough that you can’t take no for an answer.”

Your body relaxed against his, Nolan’s words calming your worst fears right away. From your vantage point, you assumed Nolan easily had at least six inches and thirty pounds on him. That seemed to be enough for him, backing away with a faulty glare and disappearing into the crowd.

“Nolan, I-” you stuttered, not knowing what to say, “Thank you,” you finally got out, your voice barely loud enough to hear over the hum of voices.

“Don’t mention it,” he muttered, his aura still cold.

You were so caught up in the shock of the moment that you hadn’t realized you were still holding each other, and right away you dropped your arm from his waist. Nolan did the same, awkwardly moving to sit on the stool next to you and flag the bartender.

You missed the warmth of his body right away, the spicy scent of his skin in stark contrast to the Axe you could only assume the other one was wearing. You swore you could still feel the ripple of his abs beneath his t-shirt on your fingertips. It was silent for a minute, both of you trying to come up with the right words.

“I really can’t thank you enough. Let me buy this round,” you pleaded, your eyes locking with his.

“Y/N,” Nolan started, your face flushing as your name fell from his lips, “I’m buying.”

You smiled up at him, nodding before looking back down in hopes of hiding the flush you felt creeping up your neck and onto your cheeks.

“Can I be honest, Nolan?” You questioned.

“Shoot.”

“Do you not like me? Did I do something? I wasn’t expecting that from you of all people-” you rambled until Nolan cut you off.

“First of all, I would have done that even if I hated you. But no, I like you, Y/N. A friend of a friend of TK’s is a friend of mine.”

You laughed at the last part before you could even process the first. Nolan’s cheeks went red, clearly embarrassed at his cliché phrasing but it didn’t matter how badly he made a fool of himself as long as you were smiling. The way your eyes scrunched and your nose turned up while you laughed was enough to make him forget the day he had.

Your laughter was interrupted by your drinks, the woman leaving you with a knowing smile before she turned away. Nolan and you both stood up ready to head back to the table before he stopped you.

“Friends?” He asked, putting his hand out in front of himself.

“Friends,” you agreed with a grin, shaking his hand before walking back to the group together.

~

two

You dreaded first days.

No matter how old you got, the anxiety of walking into an unfamiliar room full of unfamiliar faces never lessened. But you were ready, you reminded yourself, putting your head up and walking to the classroom like you had been there a hundred times before.

By the time you were walking out after the 90 minutes were up, your heart was pounding and you could feel the tears pricking the back of your eyes as you ran out of the building, not even bothering to introduce yourself to anyone.

The walk from the university back to your apartment was a blur. You couldn’t believe you had made such a poor first impression. You thought you were prepared, you had your notebook ready and all the right textbooks in order, but you somehow missed that there was an assignment due on the very first day.

As you rushed through the busy streets of the city, dodging people left and right, your mind raced back to that room.

“Ms. Y/L/N, can you please give your thoughts on the first case study?” Your professor questioned, intently watching you as your panic set in.

Your heart began to race and your palms sweat as you struggled to find the words to say that you hadn’t done the reading. This had never happened to you before, you were an A+ student for your entire life, almost unhealthily so. You couldn’t remember the last time you had missed an assignment, it just wasn’t something you did.

“Alright, then. Anyone else who actually checked the syllabus have something to say?”

Your professor's words were stuck in your head, playing over and over again when you finally reached your building. Now that you were so close to being in the comfort of your own space you could feel your wheels spinning, the stress and emotion overtaking your body.

Your hands shook as you tried to unlock the door, your body pushing through the threshold when you finally got it open.

“Aubrey?” You called as you walked through the hallway. She had known you for so long and always knew what to do to calm you down. But instead of Aubrey’s bright voice welcoming you back, you were met with silence.

“Where are you?” You muttered under your breath, your voice shaking as the tears threatened to spill over any second. As you turned the corner into the living room, you found three bodies spread across the couch, none of whom belonged to Aubrey.

“Oh,” you sputtered out, surprised to see Travis, Kevin, and Nolan watching a game.

“Y/N!” Travis called out, his infectious smile almost making your tight-lipped frown fade, “Aubrey just ran out for something but she should be back soon.”

You could feel Nolan’s gaze burning into you. You did your best to avoid his eye contact in hopes of hiding your current state from him. He had been nothing but kind to you, but you still felt so exposed standing in front of him, suddenly insecure about your outfit.

“I’m just going to go,” you whispered, pointing down the hall to your room. You felt horrible just ignoring them like that, but you knew you didn’t have it in you to keep up with them right now.

Your bag fell out of your hands almost instantly as soon as the door to your room clicked shut, the sound of your laptop hitting the hardwood floor making you cringe. You collapsed on your bed face first, the emotion you had been holding back for what felt like forever overwhelming you. Your body wracked in sobs as you replayed your embarrassment in a seemingly endless loop.

Nolan knew something was wrong the second he saw you. He may have only met you just a few days ago, but after growing up with two sisters he recognized the signs right away. He had no idea what was wrong, but he did know that you were barely holding it together.

Your head snapped up when you heard a series of soft knocks on your door, “Aubrey?” You asked, your voice rising with hope.

“No, uh, it’s Nolan.”

Your face fell when you heard his deep voice through the wood. You barely knew Nolan, he couldn’t see you like this. You paused for a moment wondering if he would just leave if you didn’t respond, but you could see his shadow through the bottom crack of your door, his feet were planted and didn’t show any signs of moving any time soon.

You silently groaned and picked yourself up, not even bothering to look in the mirror before opening the door because you knew it was not going to a pretty sight regardless. You hastily wiped underneath your eyes, the black of your mascara flaking right off your tear-stained skin. This wasn’t exactly how you wanted the new boy in your life to see you right after meeting you, but you just were friends, right?

“What, Nolan?” You sighed when you finally opened the door.

You didn’t mean to be so stark, but it just came out. His presence overwhelmed you just like it had at the bar a few nights ago. He was leaning against the door frame with his hands tucked into the pockets of his sweatpants. The backward hat resting atop his head flattered him perfectly, drawing attention to the tufts of his brown hair curling around his ears and neck.

Nolan stood up straight as soon as he saw you, his eyes softening when his suspicions were confirmed: you had been crying.

“I just wanted to check on you,” he mumbled, his eyes never leaving your own.

The tension in your shoulders released as you looked up at him. He didn’t say anything else, just tilting his head down towards you as he continued to scan your face for any signs of how you were feeling. You couldn’t pinpoint it, but there was something about Nolan that made you feel so safe, so secure, like as long as you were with him you could avoid your demons.

“I’m fine,” you murmured, your voice barely above a whisper.

“No you’re not,” Nolan rebutted, raising his eyebrows as if he was challenging you to lie to him again.

You didn’t say anything, but rather you moved your body to the side and ushered him into your room. Nolan happily obliged, awkwardly standing as he took in his surroundings. Your room was just as he expected, it was minimal, just like his. You didn’t like clutter, everything had a place. It was one way you tried to control the chaos that was your life.

“You can sit,” you spoke, breaking the silence.

Nolan nodded and sat next to you at the foot of the bed. You couldn’t help but let your eyes trail along his leg, the way his thighs stretched the fabric of his sweatpants making your cheeks flush.

“It was my first day at this new program I’m in and it didn’t go well, that’s all,” you finally sputtered out, staring down at your lap as your hands fidgeted. “I’ve never been good at first impressions,” you added, a gentle laugh escaping your lip as you thought back to your first time meeting Nolan.

“Listen, I’m sure it wasn’t that bad,” Nolan encouraged, “You seem like a pretty great person.”

You scoffed at his attempt to make you feel better, your emotions creeping their way back into your head.

“It was-” you paused, using every fiber within your being to try not to lose it in front of him, “It was bad.”

“C’mere,” Nolan whispered, turning on the bed to face you more and opening his arms, practically begging for your embrace.

You shook your head, closing your eyes as the fresh tears started burning. You were so selective in who you exposed your most vulnerable state to, and you barely knew Nolan. But despite this, you felt such an instant connection with him, and if his overt kindness was any indication, he felt the same way.

You let your final guard down, leaning back and curling into Nolan’s frame. He immediately wrapped his arms around you, holding you tight against him as one hand moved up to your head to rub soft circles into your hair.

“Go ahead and cry,” he hummed, his body gently rocking you back and forth.

You melted at his touch, your head nuzzling into the crook of his neck, the muted orange of his Flyers hoodie the last thing you saw before your eyes shut in sobs. His scent was overwhelming, the mix of his body wash and the leftover cologne lingering on his hoodie flooding your senses. You felt as if you disappeared in his grasp, like the world around you vanished and nothing else mattered.

You didn’t even know how much time had passed, but Nolan didn’t move an inch. He held you like it was the only thing he had to do all day. Once the tears stopped falling and your breathing steadied, you pulled back, instantly flooded with embarrassment.

“Wow,” you chuckled, wiping your cheeks, “I am so sorry, Nolan, I don’t know what happened I just-”

“Don’t,” he interrupted, “We’re friends, remember?” He teased, the corners of his mouth lifting in a gentle smile as he bumped your shoulder.

“Yeah,” you laughed.

“I think we were planning on grabbing some food,” Nolan mumbled, his hand scratching the back of his neck as he spoke, “If you want to come.”

“Oh, I don’t know.”

“Come on, you’re coming. If I have to put up with those two out there so do you.”

You rolled your eyes, but it was the least you could do after what he had just done for you.

“Give me five minutes to look less dead.”

Nolan smiled as you agreed, slipping out of the room so you could change and freshen up.

“What the fuck was that?” Nolan was bombarded by Kevin as he sat back down.

“Nothing,” Nolan mumbled, not in the mood to be questioned about things he didn’t even know the answer to.

“She let you go in there?” Aubrey asked, just having gotten back.

“Yes?” He responded, confused by her question.

Aubrey didn’t bother getting into it and changed the subject instead, but inside she was scheming. She knew you, how closed off you were, but here you were opening up to Nolan like you’ve known him for years. Nothing made Aubrey happier than watching this friendship bloom, and she couldn’t help but wonder if there was potential for more.

~

three

Team galas usually didn’t bother Nolan, it was part of the job, but tonight it was the last place he wanted to be. His tux felt too tight, the stuffy conversation with potential sponsors was putting him to sleep, and his date was, to be frank, insufferable.

Nolan had no problem going to an event without a plus one, he and TK were usually the two single guys spending their time causing trouble, but now that Aubrey was in the picture Kevin had decided he had seen enough. So, despite Nolan begging him to leave him alone, Kevin set him up with one of his friends from Boston.

She was just as Kevin described, beautiful and smart, but that was about all. Nolan was calm and reserved, at least until he was comfortable with someone, but she was the complete opposite. Her personality filled the entire room and although he admired her confidence, Nolan was exhausted. He felt like he couldn’t be himself, like he had to work to match her energy.

After what felt like hours of entertaining her and Kevin, Nolan made his escape to the bar. It was the first moment to himself he had, the relief immediately flooding him as he leaned against the counter. He titled his glass to the bartender, silently requesting a refill when he felt his phone buzzing in the pocket of his suit pants.

Nolan begrudgingly pulled the phone, wondering who it could possibly be. The entire team was with him and it was unlike his family to call him on a Saturday night. But when he saw your name flashing across the screen, his whole demeanor shifted.

“Nolan!” He heard you exclaim, your voice like a breath of fresh air.

“Y/N?” He questioned. You had never called him out of the blue like this before. Nolan nodded to the bartender thanking him before taking his drink and walking out to the empty hallway so he could hear you better. “Everything okay?”

It wasn’t really. You had just come back home from a date, one Aubrey practically forced you to go on. You pleaded to her that you were fine, that you weren’t ready to start dating in the city yet, but regardless, you found yourself sitting across from one of her coworkers at a restaurant downtown.

There was nothing wrong with him, he was nice, but it was evident to you before your drinks were even ordered that this wasn’t going to work. You pushed through the meal, putting on your best fake smile and pretending to laugh at his forced humor. You politely declined his offer to walk you home, instead opting to get an Uber so you could get out of your dress as soon as possible.

Now you were home, your sweats on and hair up with a glass of wine in your hand. The glass quickly turned into almost the entire bottle, drowning your sorrows of another failed date with your favorite red. That’s when you made the mistake of picking up your phone, your fingers scrolling through your contacts until you found the one name you knew would be able to distract you.

“I’m great. I mean I’m not, but it’s fine,” you rambled, your words slurred as you spoke.

For once it was you mumbling and not Nolan. He didn’t know what, but his gut was telling him that something was wrong, he could practically smell the alcohol on your tongue through the phone. After a long pause of trying to figure out what to say, his thoughts were interrupted.

“Come over?” You whispered, “I’m so sick of being alone.”

Nolan’s heart dropped at your words, his eyes blinking shut as he pondered his next move. His eyes scanned the ballroom, finally landing on his date. She was sitting at their table, Nolan’s empty seat sticking out like a sore thumb, laughing at whatever story of his college days Kevin was regurgitating. He would feel like an ass if he just left, and he would be lying if he said the prospect of an easy lay hadn’t crossed his mind tonight, but you were more important.

“Give me twenty.”

-

Since calling Nolan you had migrated from your bed to the couch, a blanket sprawled across your body while you laid horizontal. The only light in the room was from the TV as one of your comfort movies played. You were barely paying attention, instead zoning out and staring at the lit-up city around you from the window.

Your mindless thoughts were interrupted by a series of knocks on the door. You threw the blanket off of your body and stood up, slowly dragging your feet across the hardwood as you made your way. But you were nowhere near prepared for what you saw as soon as you opened the door.

Nolan towered over you in the door frame. He was wearing a suit, the soft, grey fabric clinging to his thighs and shoulders perfectly. His long hair was slicked back and tucked behind his ears. The scent of his cologne overwhelmed you instantly, the warm aroma making you want to melt into him. One hand was resting in his pant pocket, while the other was carrying a take-out bag from one of your favorite spots.

“Hi,” Nolan quietly muttered, breaking the silence.

His deep voice broke the trance you were in, and that’s when the realization hit you.

“I completely forgot you guys had that thing tonight,” you blurted, the alcohol in your bloodstream clogging your train of thought, “I am so sorry. You have to go back, I feel horrible.”

Your hands came up to your face, hiding your embarrassment. How could you forget? You spent hours this morning helping Aubrey pick out her dress.

“Y/N,” Nolan cooed, his large hands gently pulling your own off of your face, “I’m here and I’m not leaving.”

Nolan didn’t let you get another word out before he was pushing past your body. He wasn’t even enjoying himself at the event and the last thing he wanted to do was go back.

It didn’t long for the two of you to finish the food, opting to head back to the couch and ignore the many empty containers for now.

“I’m never going on a date ever again,” you slurred, “I don’t even want to look at a man ever again.”

Despite trying to be quiet, Nolan couldn’t hide his chuckle. He had heard similar frustrations from his two sisters growing up. He had been around endless assholes throughout his life, he knew how exhausting it must have been to try to find a decent one.

“Can’t blame you,” he mumbled.

Your body slumped against the back of the couch, your eyes slipping shut as the wine and food started to lull you into a sleepy haze. Nolan scanned your face, a soft smile creeping onto his face as he watched your chest gently rise and fall with each breath. Before he could catch himself, he lifted his hand and pushed back the hair that had fallen in your face, tucking it behind your ear.

In that moment Nolan knew that he was fucked.

Never before had he dropped everything for a girl as he did for you tonight. But he also had never connected with someone like he did with you. You didn’t force him to be something he wasn’t, there was no pressure to put on an act. It just felt natural with you. But your words from just a few minutes before lingered in the back of his head. You made it clear that you weren’t looking for anything right now, it only took one miserable date to remind you of that. So Nolan pulled his hand away, trying to ignore the burning of your skin against his fingertips as they trailed across your soft cheek.

You were friends. Just friends.

-

You had no idea how much time had passed, but suddenly you felt yourself stir awake, your eyes peeling open to find yourself tucked into Nolan’s side. His body was warm below yours, his arm resting across your shoulders holding you in place as you lay against his chest. From your peripheral vision, you could see his suit jacket on one of the couch cushions, the soft material of his button-down rubbing on your cheek.

You had two options. You could either acknowledge that you awkwardly fell asleep on him in your drunken state, or you could pretend that you never woke up and continue to enjoy the comfort of his embrace.

Needless to say, you chose the latter.

But you must have dozed off again because the next time you woke up you were being carried into your bedroom. Your arms were wrapped tightly across Nolan’s neck, the tips of your fingers naturally lifting to twirl the tufts of his hair.

“Shhh, I got you,” Nolan whispered as he felt you move, just before he laid you down onto your bed, “I’ll be right back.”

Nolan hastily left the room, leaving you to bask in the memory of his warmth as your head fell back against your pillow. Within just a few seconds he was back, placing a cool glass of water on your nightstand table. But almost just as fast as he came back, he was leaving again.

“Stay,” you murmured, watching him pause at the outline of your door.

“I- I got the couch.”

“Okay,” you responded, trying to hide your disappointment.

Nolan visibly cringed the second your door was closed, his head falling to his lap once he sat down. He wanted nothing more than to climb into bed with you. The thought of holding you beneath the sheets and feeling your soft skin in contrast to his rough hands made him dizzy. But the last thing he wanted to do was make you uncomfortable. You weren’t sober enough to say he could stay, and there was no chance in hell Nolan was going to risk scaring you off. So he took the couch, laying across the cushions with his eyes locked on your door until his eyelids gave in to his exhaustion. 

~

four

It was finally Friday, another week in the books. 

Your classes were taking more out of you than you had expected, the hours of reading and note-taking blending together as you finally closed your last tab. You had no plans for the night, and you honestly couldn’t be happier about it. A hot shower, takeout, and falling asleep early encompassed your perfect night recently.

Just as you were about to get in the shower, you were distracted by your phone ringing. You picked it up, surprised to see it was Kevin calling.

“Hi, Kevin,” you spoke, a slight edge to your words. You adored Kevin, he was an absolute sweetheart, but sometimes you just didn’t have the patience.

“What are you doing tonight?”

You rolled your eyes at his question, “Nothing.”

“Incorrect, you’re coming over and hanging out with me and Pat.”

“I am?” You laughed, taken aback by Kevin’s forwardness.

“Teeks and Aubrey are coming too, come on, Y/N,” he continued.

You knew you weren’t getting out of this without a real excuse, no matter how much you wanted to stay in. You hadn’t seen Nolan since the night you embarrassed yourself, the cringe of drunk dialing him after a bad date had yet to escape your memory.

“What time?”

“Uh- Let’s say 7.”

“Alright, Kev. See you later,” you hung up the phone, throwing it back on your bed before getting in the shower.

-

As you approached the boys’ apartment door, it was quieter than you expected it to be. Aubrey said she was already with Travis and would meet you there, so you were arriving alone. You assumed they would already have been there by now, but you ignored the silence and knocked on the door.

Just a few seconds later, the door swung open and you were face to face with Nolan. Your eyes widened when you saw him, his sweatpants hanging low on his hips and his bare torso staring at you. You quickly composed yourself, using every ounce of self-control within you to avoid trailing your gaze across his broad shoulders and down his chest, the curves and divots of his abs making your mouth water.

“Sorry,” Nolan mumbled, his cheeks flushing even redder than they usually were, “I thought you were Kevin, he always forgets his keys. Come in.”

You followed Nolan into the apartment, the muscles of his back rippling as his arms swung. You sat down on the couch, awkwardly waiting while he disappeared into his room. He came back just a few seconds later, his body now hidden behind a wrinkly t-shirt.

“Where is everyone?” You questioned, your body stiff as Nolan relaxed into the cushion next to you.

“Not sure,” he mumbled, the red of his cheeks lingering, “Kev said you were coming with Aubrey?”

Your face scrunched in confusion, “He told me she was coming here with Travis.”

Nolan then pulled his phone out and started typing a message to Kevin, desperate to figure out where he was. For some reason being here with you alone was making him nervous, there was an awkward energy in the air that had never been there before.

Nolan was reaching for the TV remote, about to ask you if you wanted to put something on when his phone sounded.

Kevin: You’re welcome

Now it was Nolan’s turn to furrow his eyebrows, the boy even more confused by Kevin’s message.

Kevin: We couldn’t watch you two anymore please just do something

Kevin: I’ll be out all night

Kevin: Don’t forget protection!

Of course. Of course, this little miscommunication was, in fact, a setup. But the worst part was that Nolan knew Kevin was right. No matter how hard he tried, he had been pining over you since that very first night. And now here you two were in an empty apartment with enough sexual tension to last the year.

“No one’s coming, are they?” You broke the silence, snapping Nolan out of his trance.

He threw his phone to the side as a slight smile crept across his stern face, “Nope,” he chuckled.

If you thought there was tension before, it didn’t even compare to what you felt now. Since meeting Nolan you were under the impression that your secretly harbored feelings for him were just that, a secret, but apparently, you weren’t as subtle as you thought. This had Aubrey written all over it, and you knew Travis was under her spell and would do anything to help her, and bonus points for chirping Nolan simultaneously. It was the elephant in the room, your mutual feelings still not being spoken but you both knew you had been called out by the people who knew you best.

“What are you thinking about?” Nolan whispered, the rough hum of his voice sending chills down your spine.

You couldn’t get even a single word out, your thoughts and feelings jumbling in your mind. After all this time the perfect opportunity was finally handed to you on a silver platter, but you still couldn’t do it.

Nolan could sense your hesitation, your close proximity and sweet scent clouding his consciousness.

“I’ll tell you what I’m thinking about,” he murmured, turning his body so he was facing you.

Your eyes had yet to leave your lap, your focus stuck on the rip of your jeans. You jumped when you felt his warm touch on your lower thigh, the warmth of his calloused hands making your heart rate rise even though the thick denim. His size was intoxicating and he made you feel like putty as he leaned closer to you.

“Y/N,” Nolan mumbled, his voice deeper than ever before.

You finally lifted your gaze, turning your head up to look at him. His baby blue eyes were piercing yours, the contact lighting a fire within you. Every reasonable thought in your head was telling you to pull away, to grab your bag and politely excuse yourself. You weren’t ready for a relationship, you had barely put yourself back together after your last heartbreak and Philly was supposed to be different. But as you sat here, your face just inches away from Nolan’s, you gave in to your desire.

Before you could talk yourself out of it, you connected your lips with his, immediately sighing in relief as his soft pout worked perfectly against you. You hastily swung your hips over and seated yourself on Nolan’s lap, an eager groan escaping him when your body rolled into his. His hands splayed across your hips, moving to circle your ass as he helped you grind deeper into his already hardening length.

Nolan trailed his lips down your jaw, nibbling and sucking on the plane of your neck. You knew he was leaving marks, but in the moment you couldn’t care less, the euphoria of his touch being the only comprehensive feeling.

“Please,” you whined, tightening your grip on his long locks, “Nolan.”

You couldn’t remember the last time someone had ignited you as Nolan had. He had barely even touched you and you were nearly certain you had already soaked through your panties, withering in his lap desperate for more.

“Now she has something to say,” Nolan teased, whispering into the shell of your ear. He gave you no warning before he was standing up, holding the back of your legs as you instinctually wrapped them around his waist.

Nolan gently tossed you on his bed, pausing to pull his shirt off before he was climbing on top of you. You were in a state of bliss, finally able to admire his frame shamelessly and without fear of getting caught. He continued to attack your neck, leaving mark after mark behind in his wake. You whimpered impatiently as his lips worked your sensitive skin, but Nolan was set on taking his time. He didn’t know if he would ever have you like this again and he was going to savor every second of it.

But you decided to take matters into your own hands, pushing his frame off of yours and pulling your sweater over your head. You grabbed Nolan’s face again, cupping both of his cheeks as your lips met again. He made quick work of your bra, unclasping it with ease behind your back and tossing it across the room.

“Fuck, you’re stunning,” he groaned, pausing to take you in. Your hair was splayed across the pillow, your cheeks flushed while your chest heaved up and down with heavy breathing. His praise went straight to your core, clenching around nothing as you grew more and more desperate for him.

Nolan wasted no more time, finally making his way down your torso before reaching the hem of your pants. His fingertips slowly ran beneath the fabric, stopping only to look up at you. Your eyes locked and you frantically nodded, understanding that he was waiting for your permission before continuing.

“Words, Y/N,” Nolan hummed into your thigh, his order gentle but firm.

“Yes,” you breathed out, “Fuck, yes.”

Nolan did as you said, unzipping your jeans and sliding them down your legs. He almost lost his balance on the mattress when he saw you laying before him, the pink lace resting across your hips being the only thing keeping him from you. Nolan settled himself between your legs, hooking both of them over his shoulders as his hot breath fanned over your pussy.

Nolan placed a soft kiss to your lace-covered clit, basking in your reaction as you let out an embarrassingly loud moan and your hands flew to his head, tangling in his hair. Your hips jerked up into the air, desperate for more friction. Nolan laid his thick forearm across your waist, his weight halting all of your movements and holding you at his mercy.

“Nolan, please just fuck me,” you begged, the suspense too much to handle as you felt yourself drip down the crease of your thigh.

“All in good time, baby,” he cooed, pulling your panties to the side and finally connecting with your throbbing pussy.

You cried out as his tongue flicked your clit back and forth, the pleasure only magnifying when he sucked it between his teeth. Your hands were locked with an iron grip in the roots of his hair, holding on like your life depended on it. Nolan hummed against your core as he continued to taste you, the vibrations of his voice sending shockwaves through your body.

Suddenly Nolan pulled back, but before you could protest you heard ripping. A gasp left your lips when you realized what he had done, the mangled lace of your panties now laying on his floor. You wanted to yell at him, complain that those were your favorite, but before you could get a word out he was back at work, this time fucking his tongue in and out of you.

Your head fell back against the pillow, your mouth opening in a silent scream when you felt him slide two fingers inside while his mouth circled your clit again. Nolan curled his fingers against your sweet spot and you knew you were done for, your back arching off the mattress as you combusted with your orgasm.

Nolan milked you through your high, his tongue flattening against your clit as his head shook and his fingers kept their pace. He finally slowed down as he felt you come down, pulling back to watch you shake as the last waves of pleasure rolled through your body. He slipped his fingers out of your fluttering pussy, only to bring them to his mouth and suck your juices clean.

“You’re really good at that,” you stammered, just now coming back to your senses after almost blacking out.

Nolan laughed, kissing his way back up your body until you two were face to face again. You couldn’t resist pulling him down and crashing your lips against his, moaning into his mouth as you tasted yourself on his tongue.

“I’m good at other things too,” he smirked, tucking your hair behind your ear, just as he had done last week, except this time he didn’t have to hide it. The soft action made your heart flutter, but his words made something else flutter.

“Give me your best, Patrick,” you challenged.

“Your wish is my command, baby.”

Nolan pushed off his arms and stood up, hurriedly stripping himself of his sweats and boxers in one fell swoop. A whimper escaped your lips when you heard the sound of his cock slapping against his stomach, your pupils dilated as your eyes trailed down his thighs admiring his tattoos. 

Reaching across you to get a condom from his nightstand, Nolan was surprised when you plucked it right from his hand. You tore open the foil and slowly rolled the condom onto him, a small smile spreading across your face when his hips buckled into your hand at your touch.

You may have been embarrassingly weak for him, but he was just as weak for you.

Nolan shifted on the bed so he was hovering over your body, leaning down to press a kiss to your mouth. Your lips moved in sync with one another, the pure lust filling the room dictating every movement. He felt you grow more and more impatient, your body stirring beneath his as he finally pulled away.

Taking one last look at you spread out before him, waiting for him to touch you, Nolan directed his attention back to between your legs. He locked eyes with you before collecting the salvia in his mouth, harshly spitting on your pussy. The moan you let out was only amplified when he started teasing you even more, dragging the head of his cock through your soaking folds.

“Nolan,” you whined, the last letter of his name prolonged as you begged, your entire body tensing while he tapped your already so sensitive clit.

“Shhh,” he cooed, rubbing his thumb in soothing circles against your hip, “Got to make sure you’re ready for me.”

Before you could get in another word of protest, Nolan was pushing one of your legs into your chest and sliding inside. Your mouth fell open as he slowly bottomed out, the sensation of him filling you paralyzing. A string of deep swears left his lips as he felt you already clenching around him.

After letting you adjust, Nolan started rocking his hips, quickly finding his rhythm. You didn’t have a single thought in your head, the way he hit your sweet spot inside and ground against your clit making you dizzy.

Nolan had never been in such bliss. He could never have imagined how good you would feel wrapped around him, your walls still pulsating from your first high as he slid in and out. The way your name sounded falling from his lips was pure ecstasy, his innate possessiveness in full drive. Your nails dug into his back, dragging burning lines into his skin that he knew he would be tormented about tomorrow in the locker room but it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered but the way your bodies fit together in perfect harmony right this moment.

You could feel yourself growing close within mere minutes, Nolan’s relentless thrusts giving you no mercy. He could tell you were almost there by the way you were fluttering around him, along with the mindless sounds of pleasure escaping your lips getting louder and louder.

“That’s it,” Nolan encouraged in your ear, “Cum for me, Y/N.”

Between his hot breath against your tingling skin and his plunging thrusts, Nolan had you seeing stars.

“Nolan, Nolan,” you whined.

You swore you almost blacked out, your vision going blank as he fucked you through your high. He wasn’t far behind you, the clenching of your pussy egging him on until he finally let go, his hips stuttering and groans filling the air as his head fell into the crook of your neck.

“Fuck,” Nolan sighed, letting his heart rate steady as he laid above you, resting the majority of his weight on his forearms.

“Yeah,” you responded with a breathy laugh, your mind still blank as you came down.

Nolan stayed there for a few minutes before finally sitting up, cringing as you whimpered when he pulled out. Your eyes slipped shut, but you could hear him shifting around the room. After pulling on a pair of fresh boxers and dampening a towel, Nolan gently cleaned you up, biting back a smirk each time you shivered at his touch. He disappeared again, this time returning with a shirt in hand, urging you to sit up so he could help you pull the soft fabric over your head.

You had every intention of getting dressed and leaving, but you just couldn’t find the energy to remove yourself from his warm bed. The sheets that smelled like him enveloped you, and now his t-shirt was draped over your shoulders begging you to stay. Nolan slid next to you, his body cradling yours from behind as he wrapped an arm around your waist, holding you impossibly close.

“Sleep well, Y/N,” Nolan hummed into your neck as he settled in.

“Goodnight,” you managed to get out, the shame of what you had just done starting to spiral in your head.

You made a mistake. Nolan was good, so good, and he deserved more than you could give him. Your last relationship ended in disaster, leaving you broken and abandoning the idea of finding love ever again. Regardless of what you told your friends and family, it was what drove you from home. Then came Nolan, he was the definition of kind. Even when he barely knew you he did whatever he could to protect you. That kind of guy deserves someone who’s got it together, not whatever mess you were. You couldn’t believe you let your attraction to him get the best of you, and now here you were, pressed against his sleeping frame as he held you.

Everything inside of you was telling you to leave. It was too much, the eventual pain of whatever this was ending was overwhelming. You could hear Nolan snoring behind you, the sound of his contentment almost bringing tears to your eyes. Gently lifting his arm from its spot across your waist, you slid from underneath his grasp. It was nearly impossible to find your clothes in the dark, but you managed to do so without making too much noise. Nolan didn’t even stir as you moved around him, folding the shirt he gave you and placing it on the nightstand.

Just as you reached for the door, you felt yourself pause. Don’t do it, Y/N. Don’t do it. But you couldn’t resist, slowly turning to take in what you were leaving behind.

Nolan was passed out, his body leaning towards the pillow where you once laid your head and his arm laying flat as if he was still holding you. You could make out the redness of his cheeks in the dim light, his eyelashes curling down onto his cheeks. Your heart broke as you looked at him, but you knew it was what you had to do. He deserved the world, which was much more than you were able to give him. Without giving it another second of thought, you opened the door as quietly as possible and made your escape.

~

+ one

It had been over three weeks since you last spoke to Nolan.

You couldn’t handle facing him just yet, so you did what you knew best: shutting out the people that cared about you the most. You ignored every single one of his calls and texts, eventually muting his number when it became too much. You replayed what you imagined he looked and felt like that morning, waking up to a cold, empty bed. It was heartbreaking, but you stayed firm in your decision. As long as you didn’t have to see his face you would be fine.

But of course, Aubrey had different plans for you.

Since that night, you had been more distant from her than ever before. You left the apartment early in the morning, spending your day in class and bouncing between different coffee shops while working. You kept up appearances when you returned in the evening, saying hello and asking her how her day was, but practically nothing else. You made an early exit to your room, citing homework or lack of sleep as your excuse. But she knew you better than anyone else, it was no secret something was wrong. Much to your content, you could only assume that Nolan was keeping your secret as well, knowing that if he told anyone on the team you would be getting an earful from her.

But Aubrey had decided that she was done letting you sulk about whatever it was you were so clearly upset by. The Flyers had been away for almost two weeks and tonight was their first game back home. Thanks to Travis, she had two tickets in hand ready for the two of you.

Before you had even shut the apartment door behind you after arriving home, she was jumping up to greet you.

“Hey!” Aubrey exclaimed as you walked in, “We’re going out tonight.”

You just stared at her confused, knowing damn well you had no intention of going anywhere. “Hey,” you started, “I- I don’t think so, I have a lot to do.”

“No, you don’t. Listen, I don’t know what is going on with you but I’m sick of watching you wallow in whatever it is. I’ve barely talked to you in almost a month, you’re coming with me,” Aubrey snapped. If there was one thing about having such an old friend it was that she always gave it to you straight.

“Where?” You begrudgingly inquired.

“Nope, it’s a surprise,” she answered. If her inkling was correct, whatever had you in this funk had something to do with a certain Flyers centerman and she was not risking you ditching because of it.  

“Fine,” you groaned.

It wasn’t news to you that you had been a horrible friend recently. Despite the anxiety that came with breaking your current routine, maybe a night with Aubrey was just what you needed to take your mind off everything.

-

A few hours had passed, and you were sitting in the back of an Uber watching the city pass you by. Aubrey maintained the anonymity of the destination, ignoring all of your pleas for even just a hint. But there were some things that she couldn’t control.

Your stomach dropped when you saw where the car was heading towards, the large Wells Fargo Center plastered on the side of the building cluing you in. Of course, you thought, how could you not have known. You had so strictly blocked Nolan and the entire team from your mind that didn’t think to look at their schedule, but now it all made sense.

“Aubrey, no,” you stated, your voice already shaking as you got closer and closer.

“What the hell happened?” she snapped back, finally getting confirmation that your funk was related to Nolan.

“Nothing, nothing happened. I just don’t want to go,” you rebutted, “I’m not in the mood to see everyone, okay?”

“You don’t have to, we’re sitting alone,” she responded, turning her phone on and showing you the location of the tickets. As she promised, they were nowhere near the family boxes.

You didn’t say anything else, instead choosing silence as the car pulled up to the entrance. You both thanked the driver before quickly exiting, a long, awkward silence falling over the two of you as you entered the arena.

You could do this, you told yourself while adjusting in your seat. You could sit through one game, you didn’t even have to see or talk to anyone. If it would make Aubrey happy, you could suck it up and sit down. The two of you had still barely said a word to each other since arriving, and you could see the disappointment on her face. Deciding it was time to get over it, you put your arm around Aubrey, smiling as you instantly felt her relax and place her head on your shoulder. Neither of you said anything, but after knowing each other for so long, you didn’t have to. She knew what you meant.

-

You didn’t know what to expect, but the second you saw Nolan step onto the ice you were flooded with emotion. He looked tired, like he hadn’t been sleeping much or well, and your heart dropped at the thought that you may have been the reason why. You still were firm in your decision to avoid anything serious right now, but you knew you went about it in the completely wrong way. Nolan was the closest thing you had ever met to an angel, but you treated him like a random one night stand from the bar you barely knew. The guilt had overtaken you over the past few weeks, and seeing him in the flesh wasn’t helping.

It was a relatively uneventful game, the rebuilding Red Wings visiting and not giving the Flyers much of a fight. By the third period they were up 4-0, one of which was scored by number 19 himself. As the horn sounded signaling the end of the game, Aubrey turned to you.

“I was going to go see Travis,” she hesitated, “Do you want to come? Or I can meet you right after?”

“I’ll wait for you,” you encouraged.

Aubrey thanked you, squeezing your hand before getting up and heading downstairs. Instead of going to the main concourse to wait, you stayed in your seat, waiting for the crowds to clear out before you moved. Pulling your phone out of your pocket, you started mindlessly scrolling as a distraction.

But your distraction didn’t last for long.

“What the hell are you doing here?”

Your eyes slipped shut when you heard his voice, that same voice that left you weak in the knees. You immediately felt your heart begin to race and your palms sweat. You felt caught. After taking a moment to pause, you finally mustered up the courage to look up at him.

Nolan’s eyes were focused on your own, his hair slicked back and soaking wet still with sweat. He had definitely not showered yet, between the fact that the game just ended minutes ago and his appearance. He was dressed in his undergarments and slides, clearly he wasted no time before coming up here to find you.

“How did you even know I was here?” you questioned back, already feeling yourself on the defense.

“Really?” Nolan scoffed, “Travis told me. How else would I have known? It’s not like you talk to me.” He trailed off, his words becoming quieter.

“Nolan, please,” you pleaded, “Please sit down.”

There was no doubt in your mind that it was time for you to come clean. You could see the pain in his eyes and the hurt behind his voice. He obliged, sinking to sit in the seat beside you, but he didn’t turn to face you. His coldness was evident, and you knew that you deserved nothing else.

“I’m sorry,” you began, “I’m so sorry, Nolan. I- I shouldn’t have left like that, with no explanation-”

“I thought I had you,” he interrupted, “Finally, Y/N, after all those weeks of tiptoeing around it, I thought we were done pretending.”

You could feel the tears burning behind your irises, and it was taking everything within you not to let them out. Nolan’s words broke you, even more than you were already broken.

“Nolan, I wanted- I want,” you corrected yourself, “Nothing more than to give myself to you, but I- I just can’t. I’m not ready.”

“Then why did you sleep with me?” his voice cracked, “And what does that even mean, ‘you’re not ready’?”

“I can’t let myself get hurt again, okay? I can’t do it,” you sighed, finally succumbing to your emotion, “I am so sorry for dragging you into my mess, but I can’t let myself go through that again. And you deserve so much better.”

Your head fell to your hands, hiding your face from him as you cried. Even just speaking out loud your last heartbreak made you a wreck. Deep down you knew Nolan wasn’t capable of hurting you like that, but you wouldn’t let him take care of you anymore. You couldn’t. He deserved someone who didn’t need to be taken care of.

“Y/N,” Nolan hummed, gently placing a hand on your back. He cringed when you jumped at his touch. “Y/N, look at me, please.”

You did as he asked, your red, puffy eyes lifting to meet his baby blues, putting you at ease almost right away.

“I’m not going anywhere,” Nolan murmured, “I don’t know what you think, but you’re not a burden. You’re the complete opposite and I want to show you that. If you’ll let me.” He paused, his eyes frantically scanning your face for any sign of your reaction. You were staring ahead of you, entranced with the ice below as you processed his words. Despite knowing how much it could potentially hurt, Nolan said what he thought he had to, “Even if it’s just as friends, but you can’t disappear on me again.”

You made Nolan feel at peace, like when he was with you nothing else mattered. But no matter how strong his feelings were, he cared for you enough to put them aside if that’s what it took to keep you in his life.

“I don't want to be friends,” you whispered, finally breaking the silence.

As if there was some kind of magnifying force between the two of you, your body lunged towards Nolan’s, your lips crashing together instantly. He was stunned, his body frozen in shock, but within seconds he melted against your touch with one hand on your lower back and the other tangled in your hair. It felt like time stopped in that moment, the only thing making you pull away was the lack of air.

You were both breathless, your foreheads resting against one another. Nolan took both of your hands in his, intertwining his much larger fingers with yours.

“I trust you,” you breathed out.

The grin that spread on Nolan’s face was like nothing you had ever seen before. You matched him right away, smiling as you watched the pure joy and relief wash over. The same joy and relief that you were feeling.

“Does this mean I finally get to take you out?” he asked, his deep mumble making you feel right at home again.

“Maybe,” you teased, “Only if you shower,” you added, pretending to push him off of you.

Nolan couldn’t help but fall into a fit of laughter at your subtle jab. That’s what he loved about you most, the way you could earn a smile or chuckle out of him like no one else.

He stood up from his seat, extending his hand out as he stared down at you. Without even a crumb of doubt creeping its way into your mind, you took his hand. Wrapping your arms around Nolan’s and resting your head against his shoulder, you walked out and into the hallway together.

Nolan leaned down and pressed a gentle peck to your forehead, and for the first time in longer than you could remember, you felt untouchable.

~

[ryqoshay]

How to Handle a Nico: Of Chicken, Tomatoes and Food Pics

Primary Pairing: NicoMaki Secondary Pairing: NozoEli Words: ~1.1k Rating: G Fandom: Love Live Time Frame: Late in Maki’s 1st and Nico’s 3rd year in college Event: Femslash Friday Event Source: @femslash-friday-prompts Prompt: Chicken

---------

Author’s Note: It feels like forever since I’ve written NicoMaki, despite having two WIPs for them that are holding up other projects. I hope I haven’t gotten rusty.

Anyway, for those unfamiliar with HtHaN, or have simply lost track due to my slow updates, at this point in the timeline, Nico is a professional idol, though only part time. She found a small production company that was willing to let her work around her part time college courses and is aiming for an Associate’s degree earned over the course of four years. Maki is hitting the books hard in preparation for a medical degree. They are dating, but keeping it a secret to avoid a scandal with Nico’s idol career. Nico and Nozomi share and apartment to cut expenses, while Eli still technically lives with Alisa and Maki stores her stuff in a dorm room she rarely uses.

Summary: Nico is making dinner tonight

---------

“Oh, chicken is on sale.” Nico suddenly changed her trajectory through the store. “I don’t remember seeing that in the ad…”

“Eh?” Maki stepped awkwardly as her arm was pulled unexpectedly. She overcorrected and ended stumbling into the girl beside her.

“Hey, watch where you’re going, Maki-chan.” Nico groused, pushing the taller girl away.

“Me? You’re the one who pulled me, Nico-chan.” Maki retorted.

The two glared at each other for a moment before Nico turned back to the display.

“Anyway,” Maki broke the momentary silence between them “I thought you were going to make…”

“Don’t you worry your pretty little redhead about that.” Nico interrupted. “I’m not dropping the tomatoes from the meal, just changing the protein. Nico knows how much Maki-chan needs her beloved tomatoes.”

“I don’t nee…”

“Maki-chan is the only girl Nico knows who has to be told to stop eating her tomatoes and eat her dessert.”

“That’s never happened.” Maki deadpanned decisively. She started to move to cross her arms but realized she couldn’t as she was holding the shopping basket.

“Well, no, maybe not exactly like that.” Nico admitted, making dismissive motions with a hand. “But close enough. Anyway, this is too good a deal to pass up.” She picked up a package to inspect. “And it will keep Nozomi happy.”

“I thought Nozomi preferred beef?”

“Well yeah, but that’s not what is on sale.” Nico placed her choice in the basked Maki was holding. “If she wants beef so bad, she can buy it herself. Now what else…” Nico checked the sale flyer in her hand. “Oh right, eggs… eggs…”

Maki couldn’t help a small smile at Nico’s insistence on bargain hunting. Even knowing Maki was paying this time and would not have had a problem with a higher price, Nico still sought the cheaper ingredients. And then Nico would use her skills in the kitchen to turn those ingredients into meals that rivaled chefs cooking with the finest and most expensive items in the high-end restaurants.

“Maki, quit your daydreaming and c’mon!” Nico motioned before rounding the meat cooler toward where the eggs were kept.

“Right, coming…” Maki said, following her girlfriend.

---------

“May I have a bit more, Nico-chan?” Maki asked, holding out her plate.

“Of course.” Nico beamed as she took the plate, obviously pleased that her girlfriend enjoyed her cooking.

“You’re not going to finish your chicken, Maki-chan?” Nozomi commented, noticing that Nico was only ladling additional sauce. “If not, I can help.” She reached out her fork.

“Back off.” Nico growled, earning a playful giggle from her roommate. “Anyway, sorry, Maki-chan, I was going to add extra sauce to your plate, but I wanted all four to be equal for my fans first.”

“Your fans?” Eli raised an eyebrow.

“Nicocchi posts pictures of everything she makes.” Nozomi explained. “Even has dedicated account for it.”

“Side account.” Nico corrected. “It’s still associated with my main account for Niconii, which focuses more on pics from my Lives or photoshoots and such; actual idol stuff.”

“You didn’t know that?”

“No.” Eli admitted. “Although it doesn’t surprise me, learning of it now.”

“Niconii’s fans love seeing her other talents, besides being the No. 1 Idol on stage.” Nico puffed her chest with pride.

“But isn’t that delving a little too much into your private life?” Eli asked, concern in her tone.

“Niconii’s fans know she has a life off-stage.”

“Well, yes, of course they know that. But what I mean is, won’t they get suspicious about the four plates?”

“Huh?” Nico tilted her head. “Why wouldn’t there be four plates?”

“What I mean is, Nozomi and I are dating.” Eli explained. “And we make no effort to hide that fact. However, you and Maki are hiding the fact that you’re dating, because you’re an idol and supposedly are forbidden.”

“Ah, yes.” Nico nodded. “My fans know full well that Maki-chan and I are close friends; have been for years. And they also know how hard Maki-chan is working in college, so of course Niconii would selflessly step in to help in the best way she can, by cooking lots of delicious and healthy meals for the future doctor.” Nico accentuated her words with dramatic movements of her hands and arms.

“Because Niconii certainly can’t help Maki-chan study.” Nozomi snarked.

Nico grumbled a curse and made a rude gesture toward the purple-haired girl.

“Nico-chan’s fans also know that this place is closer to campus than my dorm.” Maki said as she scooped up another full spoonful of tomato sauce, all but ignoring the few pieces of chicken.

“You told Nico’s fans you stay here?” Eli asked incredulously.

“No, some busybody did.” Maki replied after swallowing. “Took a bunch of pictures and such.” She sighed. “It was really a pain. But thankfully, my RA is active on most of the forums for Nico-chan and she spearheaded the opposition argument. Hanayo of course helped a lot as well. And it all worked out well enough to prevent a scandal.”

“Still, you two probably should try to be more careful.”

“We are.” Nico insisted. “And yeah, sure, we hang out a lot in public, possibly more so than we did back in high school. But we don’t hug or kiss or even hold hands in public, even though I know Maki-chan wants to.”

Maki almost choked on a bite of chicken. Nico laughed but patted her back gently anyway. Nozomi also laughed while Eli looked ready to move around the table should Maki prove to be actually choking and Nico’s halfhearted attempts to prevent it failed.

“Anyway,” Nozomi spoke once the commotion at the table calmed a bit “once we’re done with dinner, there’s a new movie out that I’d like to watch tonight.”

“Oh?” Nico turned her attention to her roommate.

“Putting on Hairs.”

Maki sneered. “Isn’t that some werewolf horror show?”

“Maki-chan is too chicken to watch a werewolf movie?” Nico giggled. “I thought it was just ghosts she was afraid of.”

“You’re one to talk.” Maki grumbled.

“It’s listed as a drama.” Nozomi said. “Although the trailer revealed some comedic moments.”

“Well with a title like that, I would expect at least some humor.” Eli pointed out.

“So, if it’s not horror, what is it about?” Maki inquired.

“Something about a werewolf hunter being hired to clear some noblewoman’s land of werewolves.” Nozomi explained. “But the main characters are the werewolves, so the story seems to be about their side of the conflict. And from what I saw in the trailer, you two might like them.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Nozomi grinned. “Guess you’ll have to watch and find out.”

Maki rolled her eyes. “Fine, whatever.”

“If Maki-chan gets too scared, she can always cling to Nico.” Nico wasn’t ready to stop teasing just yet, giggling as Maki elbowed her in the side. “But if that’s settled, I can get dessert ready while you guys clear the table. We can eat while we watch.”

The other three at the table agreed, stood, and began to put their plan in motion.

---------

Author’s Note Continued: Yes, I have decided to make PoH a movie in the HtHaN universe. Because why not? HtHaM is a doujin here. And my HL(AU) is a doujin over in HL; and here, since my canon-compliant fics are essentially connected at this point. The main reason I did that was actually to get another use out of the event Prompt, but now I want to have ShizuKasu watch Detective Otosu and YuuAyuSetsu watch whatever I end up naming the Beauty and the Beast rewrite play.

As for the bit about Maki, and Nico, being afraid of ghosts, that is from one of the School Idol Diary entries where the two explore the school at night to find a ghost they can exploit for idol purposes.

Anyway, it felt good to write NicoMaki again. But deities only know when I will get back to those two pesky WIPs I have for them. My muse has been in active rebellion against writing those two, due in no small part to my distaste for writing them actually fighting, not just teasing.

And finally, I think I’ll start adding these Femslash Friday entries into their parent fics on AO3 the week after I post them, unless they require some rework. But I’m pretty sure this one and last week’s are good to go as they are, so last week’s will be added to PoH-PP now.

[whomst-art-thou-whomst-whomst]

Texts from the Lost Tomb part 6.1

🎶 Back on the bullshit I never got off🎶

Is this another unnecessary story arc?? With three sections??

Yes.

Wushanju Crew Chat

Wang Meng: You know, I’m someone who appreciates consistency in my day. My life is pleasant, very few issues indeed if you ignore the big ones. And yet. Yet here we are. With unresolved messes at the end of a day.

Wang Pangzi: SOMETHIN YOU NEED TO SAY MARY POPPINS

Wang Meng: We need to talk about Huo Daofu and the glittery bead curtain.

Wang Pangzi: MY FAVE TEEN WIZARD SERIES

Wu Xie: did you turn on that suggested word thingy lol

What glittery bead curtain

Wang Meng: I closed the shop at 6:00pm this evening on the dot. I locked all of the doors in and out of the shop very carefully, especially in light of recent events. The hall leading to the back office was empty. I filed the day’s paperwork, updated and sent emails, and then spent an extra hour organizing receipts and dusting. When I came back out, there were glittery iridescent bead curtains over the front entrance to the shop.

What could this mean?

Wu Xie: uh that you need to spend less time at work?

Wang Pangzi: LOOKS LIKE WE GOT ONE FOR THE DETECTIVES. THE MYSTERY OF THE BEDAZZLED THRESHOLD COMMENCES

Wu Xie: I think we can be relatively secure in thinking a glittery bead curtain isn’t a hostile threat

Wang Pangzi: SAYS YOU

I REMEMBER YE OLDE EXPLORATION TIMES HOW FAST THINGS GOT FURIOUS

BEANBAG CHAIRS SET AFLAME AND LEFT ON DOORSTEPS AS A WARNING

GLITTERBOMBS FOR DAYS

PANIC AT THE DISCO

Wang Meng: Ugh, forget it. I should have just taken them down, regardless of who they belong to.

Zhang Qiling: They are not mine.

Wang Pangzi: A BOLD STATEMENT COMING FROM OUR PRIME SUSPECT

SOMEONE QUICK GO DRAW CHALK AROUND THE DOORWAY TO MARK THE SCENE OF THE CRIME

Wang Meng: Do we know anyone who *would* sneak in and put those up? For whatever reason, legal or not? Even as a joke?

Wang Pangzi: ARE YOU SERIOUSLY ASKING WHETHER WE KNOW ANYONE WHO IS CHAOTIC, AN OUTLAW, A PRANKSTER AND/OR SNEAKS INTO PLACES

BECAUSE THAT WOULD MEAN OUR SUSPECT LIST IS LITERALLY EVERYONE WE KNOW EXCEPT FOR YOU.

Wu Xie: okay let’s think about this; for starters, I didn’t break into my own shop

Wang Meng: You would be in danger of doing some work in the process, that’s true.

Wang Pangzi: LOL

Wu Xie: ANYWAY let’s keep going. For example, Xiao Ge would only break in somewhere for a good reason. Xiao Ge, did you do this?

Zhang Qiling: No.

Wu Xie: okay who’s next

Wang Pangzi: YOU REALLY MISSED YOUR CALLING IN INTERROGATION TIANZHEN

REALLY PUT THE SCREWS TO HIM

IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE;)

Zhang Qiling: How can we be certain *you* didn’t do it?

Wang Meng: Admittedly that was my guess, too.

Wang Pangzi: WOW I SEE HOW IT IS

BLAME PANGZI AS USUAL

ANYWAY HOW DOES HUO DAOFU FIT INTO THIS

Wu Xie: Oh yeah him! Oops I got distracted

Wang Pangzi: UR ENTIRE HISTORY IN A NUTSHELL

Wu Xie: Ugh fuck off

Wang Meng what abt Huo Daofu??

Zhang Qiling: ?

Wu Xie: oh sorry xiaoge I didn’t realize you wouldn’t have spent much time around him last year

He and I go way back

Zhang Qiling: Way back where?

Babysitters Club Chat

Wang Pangzi: I CANNOT BELIEVE HE IS BUYING YOUR INNOCENT ACT

IF YOU EVER TURN TO EVIL WE ARE FUCKED

Zhang Qiling: ?

Wang Pangzi: YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHO HUO DAOFU IS

YOU WERE EXTREMELY POLITE AND BORDERLINE FRIENDLY TOWARDS HIM

Zhang Qiling: I wanted him to feel welcome. I wanted to be sure he understands he has a place here. A specific place.

Wang Pangzi: FOR A SILENT GUY YOU ARE A MASTER AT SUBTLE POWER PLAYS IM ALL TINGLY

LMAO THE IDEA OF WU XIE LEAVING YOU FOR HUO DAOFU IS HILARIOUS AND ALSO NOPE

Zhang Qiling: Rationally, I understand that.

Main Chat

Wang Meng: Huo Daofu is coming for the weekend—didn’t Wu Xie tell you? Wu Xie asked me to check in a week ahead so we could start getting ready for his arrival

Wu Xie: oh yeah I did do that

Wang Meng: Fortunately I know you and so I already went ahead and took care of everything.

Re: the trip

He made a deal with Wu Xie’s doctor that he would do periodic checkups on him here at Wushanju

Bc Wu Xie hates being in the hospital

And frankly the hospital hates him too

Wang Pangzi: FAMILIARITY BREEDS CONTEMPT LOL

I FORGOT HUO DAOFU WAS DOING THAT

A VERY CHIVALROUS GESTURE

WOULDNT YOU SAY

XIOAGE

Zhang Qiling: Is it safe for him to be here with a criminal loose on the premises?

Wu Xie: Right, back to the curtain! Let’s focus on the curtain, hmm?

Wang Pangzi: I AM SO LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS WEEKEND.

ALSO WE CAN RULE OUT XIAO BAI FOR THE CURTAIN SHE JUST SENT A SELFIE FROM NORWAY COVERED IN GREEN SLIME WITH ZERO CONTEXT, UR PROTEGE INDEED

Wu Xie: okay but who else would do something so oddly charming yet illegal and—wait.

Snake Eyes Chat

Wu Xie: hey, Glasses hasn’t been in touch lately right?

Li Cu: uh nope

Unless u count the outdated memes

Why, is money or Xie Yuchen missing

Or is this curtain related, I saw Wang Meng’s tweet

Wu Xie: haha no nothing to worry about really

(I mean maybe? but who knows)

Wang Meng is probably just getting a little paranoid in his old age

Li Cu: better than getting reckless and stupid as hell in ur old age

Wu Xie: …hey:(

Unknown Number: Li Cu, we discussed this.

Wu Xie: ????????

Li Cu: *sigh* fine, reckless and stupid as heck

Unknown Number: …close enough.

Wu Xie: EXCUSE who is that

Madame, Sir, Non-Binary Tree Spirit, etc—whomst the fuck

Are you

Li Cu is underage FYI

So Im staying on this chat

Li Cu: okay first of all, it’s not like that

Second of all I’m literally not underage I s2g

u threw the embarrassing surprise bday party, okay so u should remember

And C, that’s my counselor and I invited her. She wanted to meet u and I knew u wouldn’t agree to a visit so I added her to our chat

we have been discussing u

Wu Xie: Oh wow!!!!!!!

What a surprise:)

hi so nice to meet you:)

Main Chat:

Wu Xie: RED FUCKING ALERT

FUCK THE CURTAIN FUCK THE VISIT

IVE BEEN TRICKED INTO FAMILY THERAPY BY A SMUG TEENAGER WHO TEXTS UNKNOWN NUMBERS

Wang Meng: I assume that means something to someone here?

Not my problem? Good.

Wang Pangzi: AHAHAHA GOD I LOVE LI CU

HES LIKE ADORABLE KARMA FOR ALL THE SHIT YOUVE PUT ME THROUGH

IM RAISING HIS ALLOWANCE

Wu Xie: wait i give him an allowance

has he been collecting on two allowances??

Zhang Qiling: Three. I knew about both of yours.

Snake Eyes Chat

Wu Xie: so uh may I ask your name?

Unknown Number: you can call me Ms. Lee.

Now, if you’re comfortable talking in this format, why don’t you tell me how things have been going?

Wu Xie: oh everything is normal and fine and safe as usual, why do you ask:)

Li Cu: I heard about ur necklace thing. nice of you to NOT mention it.

another dangerous adventure. again. prick.

Ur lucky your cool boyfriend cares about you so much or you’d have already died like ten years ago

Wu Xie: lol try twenty years ago

Li Cu: That isn’t funny.

Unknown Number: …What?

Wu Xie: shit ur right, okay that was a bit glib, my apologies.

…I use humor as a coping mechanism?

Unknown Number: and Li Cu, how do you feel about that?

Li Cu: he doesn’t even know what that phrase means

He doesn’t cope, like ever

In fact

It’s kind of why we met

Which is a funny story in retrospect tbh

Wu Xie: haha what are you talking about sweetie hahaha need I remind you of certain anecdotes that could idk send me to jail maybe lmao

Unknown Number: …You know, perhaps an in-person meeting might be more effective?

Wu Xie: haha such a nice idea but why

Main Chat

Wu Xie: If I go to jail, I’ll have to create alliances for protection, right, that’s how it works on tv

Who do we know who spends time in jail

Other than Hei Yangjing, he’s only ever there for like 12 hours and i suspect he just gets himself arrested bc he enjoys the breaking out process

Also how’s the curtain case coming along

Zhang Qiling: Has someone threatened you?

Wu Xie: well not yet but soon I’m sure

Wang Pangzi: WHERE WAS THIS PARANOIA WHEN WE GOT TAKEN TO THE TEA HOUSE HUH

Snake Eyes Minus Your Fucking Therapist Chat

Li Cu: okay how tf did u pull off spy and undercover shit

u are sus as hell

Wu Xie: damn son is it pick on Wu Xie night

I missed the flyers or I would’ve invited my uncles

Also re: the curtain it’s been mostly solved

Li Cu: I’m not your son, idiot.

Wu Xie: …oh. Sorry, sorry, you’re right, bad choice of words, haha

Forget i said anything

Delete this chat even

Li Cu: shit I meant

Legally, biologically, I meant—

shit

…I turn into an asshole as a coping mechanism?

Wu Xie: oh that’s all okay! I have to go do something else now let me know if you need anything okay kid thanks!

Li Cu: goddamn it calm down who’s the kid here

lemme organize my thoughts so I can articulate my emotions fuckin healthily or w/e

Ugh maybe for like one afternoon we could go to Ms. Lee together? She knows how to word stuff

Wu Xie: uh…okay.

Li Cu: Anyway you don’t need to worry abt jail

As if you would survive prison for one day you’d piss off half the place in like an hour or less

I gave Ms. Lee the heavily edited version of the desert highway to hell roadtrip and i discussed it more in terms of like “nightmarish but still wouldn’t take any of it back”

Well maybe the sand

that shit was everywhere

Wu Xie: oh kiddo. It’s fine, really…You don’t have to explain yourself to me.

Li Cu: no, no it’s just

I do technically have a dad

who is an asshole. Being a son doesn’t really mean shit to me bc it sucked.

So you need to stop backing down just cuz ur guilty abt stuff. I’m really really glad ur not my dad in a good way. Do u get what I mean there

Where’s the mafia widower I followed into hell, huh

Wu Xie: Ur a good kid, despite my influence. I’m really glad you have someone to talk to after everything I…after everything. Wow this talking through feelings thing is kind of weird but nice ur right

Jfc no wonder it took me and xiaoge so long to—you know what, we won’t get into that

Li Cu: ew tmi

Also re: this week’s recent necklace fuckery

I moved my stuff here, I live here now

So you can’t die anymore

Or else…Idk I don’t have a threat planned

anyways abt the curtain

Wu Xie: oh my god, kid…kid you have no idea

I am in tears.

Li Cu: see this is why I can’t be nice to you I can sense the hallmark channel from here

Ugh don’t be sad in ur room that’s dumb

Go hug Pangzi or something

Maybe delete this chat

Or the curtain thing

Focus on the curtain thing

Just stfu and go away

Wu Xie: <3 screenshotting this <3

Li Cu: I take back everything I said. This is why Xiao Ge sleeps on the roof. I hope the ghosts of the Wangs put up that curtain to strangle you somehow. Go die in a stupid way, it’ll suit you.

Wu Xie: lol don’t worry I’m not gonna embarrass you with it or anything

Main Chat

Wu Xie: omg guys look how cute my kid is *sending screenshot*

Wang Pangzi: I MEAN

HE IS WISHING YOU DEATH

BUT SURE

CUTE I GUESS

Wu Xie: no but read the whole thing:):):)

Zhang Qiling: It is indeed very hard to remain angry with you. And you are welcome to join me on the roof.

Wang Pangzi: UH NOPE

NOT WHENI HAD TO BLEACH THE COUNTER IN THE KITCHEN

DONT TRAUMATIZE THE EARLY BIRDS THEYRE ALREADY FREAKED OUT BY U YA HOODIE CRYPTID

Wu Xie: ok true but babe ur like a sexy cryptid

Wang Meng: so, are we just accepting that there is a glittery curtain of unknown origin, and Huo Daofu is going to have to see it while he’s waiting for you at Wushanju bc you’re going to family therapy?

Wu Xie: right

Wang Pangzi: SHOULDA TAKEN EARLY RETIREMENT HUH

Wang Meng: I’m going to go dust something.

Unnamed Chat:

Unknown number: so the curtain…

Unknown number 2: yep, not my best work but I kinda panicked last minute u know

Unknown number: what is in the water at Wushanju that makes everyone dumb and attractive

Unknown number 2: relax they’ll figure it out

[recurring-polynya]

In tHiaM, Renji mentioned a fictional fateful encounter in which he and Rukia met in the circus. I can picture this deeply. The Rukon has circuses. It has gritty knife throwers, it has scrappy beast tamers, it has a lovely doe-eyed tightrope walker who does stunts so dangerous your hair'd turn white just watching her. It is for Renji's birthday so he should get Rukia being extremely badass and saving his life from a rampaging circus bear. Ideally, Kenpachi is there.

A lot of times, I’ll have some idea for a story, and I’ll do a bit of research and find out that the thing I wanted to do absolutely does not exist in Japanese culture, and I was completely sure that when I dug into it, Japanese circuses would not be a thing, or they would be extremely different from Western circuses, but as it turns out, circuses were absolutely a thing in the Edo era, and they had acrobats and strongmen and horseriding and more. I had so many tabs open about circuses, and almost none of it actually made it into this fanfic.

Anyway, THANK YOU ALOPEX, you know what I like to write, and what I like to write is Renji telling rambling stories of questionable veracity. I put in some lifting for good measure. This might be the most perfect Renji birthday story.

If it isn’t immediately evident, this takes place in the middle of the Advance Team Arc, or more specifically, in the middle of my Advance Team Arc story, See You on the Other Side, where Renji tells Chad a different RenRuki origin story that’s basically the desert bandit subplot from Crouching Tiger, and also a story about bees.

Read on ao3 | ff.net

🏋️‍♂️   💪   🤡    🎪    🐻

Renji hefted the last bumper plate onto the end of the barbell and tightened the collar. Chad watched him with narrowed eyes.

“You sure you want to try this?” Renji asked. “One thousand pounds. It’s the weight limit for this bar. Once you beat this, we gotta go back to Urahara’s place and pick up big rocks.”

Apparently, Chad worked part time at his gym, which meant he had a key, which meant that he and Renji could go in at two a.m. so that Renji could teach him how to lift absurd amounts of weight with his reiatsu. It was pretty convenient, as long as you didn’t mind lifting weights at two a.m. Renji loved lifting weights at two a.m.

“You just don’t want to tell me another story,” Chad replied, flexing his shoulders in anticipation.

“Whatever, I got a million of them.” Renji took a few steps backward.

Chad flared his nostrils and stepped up to the barbell. He squatted down and curled his fingers around the grip. He took three deep breaths as he stared straight again. Leading with his hips, he straightened up in a smooth, textbook perfect movement, the sinews in his neck popping out, the air around him boiling with power.

Renji wished he could drag Chad over to Squad Six, so those spoiled weenies could see what hard work actually looked like.

Chad dropped the weight and a huge breath burst out of him, his eyes widening in relief. “I did it,” he gasped.

“You did it, buddy!” Renji shouted, pointing at the barbell. “You’re a machine! You didn’t even make it look hard!”

“It was hard,” Chad managed.

“I don’t believe it!” Renji continued. “One thousand pounds! You’re incredible, dude!”

“What do you mean, you don’t believe it? You told me to do it.”

“I mean, when I told you we were gonna work for the big one-kay, it was, you know, a stretch goal. I didn’t expect you to get there so fast!”

“You said you would tell me another story when I hit it! I assumed it was a reasonable goal.”

“I keep making unreasonable goals and you keep hitting them, so I’m just sort of winging it, now, t’be honest! I’m actually really bothered how much you are motivated by my dumb stories. If I had any human money, I would just offer to buy you tacos or something.”

“I can make my own tacos. I like the stories.”

Renji sighed. They didn’t have tacos in Soul Society and he was determined to eat as many tacos as he possibly could while he was stationed in the Living World. “Go get cleaned up, and I’ll put the weights away and try to decide which story to tell you this time. I did bring us some protein shakes. I can’t vouch for them, because they’re made out of stuff I found in the Shouten, but it’s important to get some calories in you after lifting. ”

“I’m sure they’re fine. I like your protein shakes. Oh, and I know which story I want to hear--how you met Rukia.”

Of course he did.

Renji was a man of many stories. He had so many good stories. He had Inuzuri stories that were full of mischief and dirtbaggery. He had Squad 11 stories that were full of headbutting and idiocy. He had interesting stories about his clever friends Izuru and Momo and funny stories about his goofy friend Shuuhei and horrible stories about his horrible friends Iba and Madarame. But Chad had asked him once how he met their mutual friend Kuchiki Rukia, a very reasonable and natural thing to ask, and Renji had responded with a ridiculous story that was very obviously not true. Now, all Chad wanted to hear was ostentatious lies about how he, Abarai Renji, had met the incomparable Kuchiki Rukia.

Renji racked his brain as he racked Chad’s weights. This would probably make the eighth or ninth Renji-Rukia origin story, he’d honestly lost count. He was running out of material. There was a bulletin board next to the weight storage rack, covered with flyers for a weightlifting tournament in Naruki City, the Karakura High kendo team, tumbling lessons. Renji stared at the picture of the girl in the sparkly leotard on the last one. He thought about how he and the gang used to make up stories of how they were gonna make it out of Inuzuri some day. He thought about Rukia’s absolute favorite, the one she told over and over, the way it got bigger and sparklier every time she told it.

Chad returned, a tracksuit zipped overtop his workout clothes. “Need help?” he asked.

“This is the last one,” Renji replied, hefting it up onto the shelf. “You can put the bar away, though.”

Chad did.

It was kinda nice, Renji thought, being in a gym in the middle of the night with Chad. It reminded him of hunching over his dorm room desk across from Izuru, cramming for written exams. It reminded him of achy muscles in a dim Fifth Company dojo, trying to figure out the mechanics of Zabimaru’s shikai deep into the wee hours. It reminded him of long runs with Ikkaku as the sun was just peaking over the city walls. The hours between dusk and dawn were a pretty good time for doing things, in Renji’s opinion.

“So, did you remember? How you met her?”

“Of course I remember!” Renji protested. “You think I would forget something like that?”

“You do get hit on the head a lot,” Chad rumbled gently and it took Renji a moment to realize he just got dragged. Chad was actually a really funny guy, you just had to pay attention.

Renji plopped down on a pile of mats and started rummaging around in his backpack for the two bottles of questionable nutritional substance he had mixed up earlier. “Well, I certainly remember the time I ran away from home and joined the circus, I’ll tell you that.” It was a good opening line, and he paused a few seconds to get the full effect.

“The circus?” Chad echoed skeptically, sitting down next to Renji and accepting his smoothie.

“The circus,” Renji replied after taking a long swig. It was very, very strawberry flavored. “So. I think I mentioned once that when I died I got sent to the shit-end of Rukongai. District 78 of the Southern Quadrant, where your best hope is to die soon and catch an express trip back to the Living World. I was too dumb and stubborn for that, though, so I was always on the lookout for a way out. Now, it’s pretty hard to move between districts in Rukongai-- it’s illegal without a special permit, see, and special permits get harder to get the further out you go. But there are a few kinds of permits that allow you to travel all up and down Soul Society, and one of those is for entertainers.”

This was more-or-less true. It was true in theory, but travelling shows never made it out to the deep Rukon-- there was no profit in it. Rukia used to swear up and down that a circus had made it to Inuzuri once, basically just passing through on their way to capture wild animals from the magical wilderness past the end of District 80, but she had seen it. Rukia was older than the rest of them, and she used to talk about it in such nauseating detail that they had no choice but to believe her.

“When I saw the posters plastered up all over town, my first thought was that it was an opportunity to pick up some quick kan as temporary labor. My primary job skill at the time was picking up heavy objects, you see, perhaps moving them from place to place. Circuses always need help with set up and tear down. I mean, do I look like a theater kid?”

Chad stared at him pointedly.

“I don’t know why I asked that,” Renji quickly corrected, “but also, keep in mind that I am Like This because I was in the circus, not the other way around. Anyway, my instincts were correct, and I found myself gainfully employed, carting crates and also tying and untying knots, another of my many talents. But then two things, or rather two someones made me decide that I needed to hitch my star to this ridiculous pageant. The first, I will admit, was a complete castle in the sky, but what is being an adolescent boy about if not chasing after hopeless dreams?”

Chad frowned. “Well. There’s school.”

“There is no school in Inuzuri, actually, and perhaps that would have kept me out of trouble, but instead, I became absolutely entranced by the glittering star of the show-- a tightrope walker of exceptional agility, grace, and beauty. Her most defining characteristic, though, was her audacity. There was no trick too dangerous for her. She somersaulted through hoops of fire. She juggled daggers. She’d stop halfway across the tightrope, pull out a tokkari, and pour herself a saucer of sake and drink it, while the audience gasped.”

“It was Kuchiki,” Chad guessed, the corner of his mouth tipping up into his shy grin.

“It was Rukia,” Renji agreed, “but imagine Rukia in head-to-toe spangles, with bells in her hair and glitter painted around her eyes, 20 feet in the air. She was unreal. She was an apparition, a spirit. I was desperate to meet her.”

“Did you?” asked Chad.

“Chad,” said Renji.

“What?”

“Did you just… did you just ask me if I ever managed to meet Rukia? Your friend and mine, Kuchiki Rukia? In the middle of this story about how I met Rukia?”

Chad thought for a moment. “It’s two a.m. and I just deadlifted a thousand pounds.”

“That’s fair, and the answer is yes, eventually, I did meet Rukia and she saved me from being eaten by a bear, but we’ll get to that. Are you drinking that protein shake?”

“Oh, sorry! It’s really good, I just keep forgetting because this story is a good one.” Chad took a long sip. “Hey, Abarai?”

“Yeah?”

“Sorry to interrupt again, but I have a question about the bear.”

“The bear is later.”

“Yeah, I realize that, but does the bear die?”

“Huh?”

“I’m just asking up front, because I don’t like stories where animals die, and if the bear gets hurt or dies, maybe could you skip over that part?”

“Oh! No, the bear is fine. Well, he’s probably reincarnated back into a living bear by now, he was pretty old even then. I exaggerated a little to make it sound dramatic, he probably wouldn’t have eaten me in any case.”

“Okay, you can go back to the story now, I just wanted to make sure. Thank you.”

“No, no, it’s cool. I’m glad you checked in.” Renji took a deep breath through his nose and mentally rearranged his story so that Rukia no longer defeated the beast in a dramatic knife fight. “Right. So, as I said, there was a second person at the circus who influenced me greatly and that was the most famous strongman in the entire Rukon, Zaraki Kenpachi--”

“Wait, Captain Zaraki? Big guy? With the bells in his hair?”

Oh, shit. “Uh, yeah. That’s a circus thing, you know. Hair bells. You, uh, know Captain Zaraki?”

“Yeah, Orihime made friends with him, and he broke us out of prison, but then we split up because there was someone he wanted to fight.”

“That sounds like him. Anyway, yeah, he’s in this story, too. I used to be in his squad, you know?”

“I gathered that from the way Madarame and Ayasegawa talk to you.”

“He helped me get in the Gotei, you see. Because of our time together in the circus. That’s a different story, though, we’re focusing on circus times, here. He wasn’t even the Kenpachi, yet, actually. One of the reasons he’s so strong is because before he was a fighter, he lifted things, heavy things. He did all the typical strongman stuff-- bending iron bars, biting through teacups, tearing packs of cards in half, but his most famous trick was balancing bamboo poles on his shoulders and then various acrobats and other performers would scramble up on them and do tricks from on top of him. He was wildly popular, pictured on all the posters. People would come to the circus just to see him. I did not have a lot going for me at this point of my life, but I was strong, and when I saw this guy, it occurred to me that if I could get him to take me on as some sort of apprentice, I might finally be able to use my strength to get out of that shitty town.”

“Seems like a good plan.”

“It did. It seemed like a good plan, except that Zaraki had a very busy schedule of getting drunk and napping when he wasn’t lifting things, and he was absolutely not interested in Inuzuri punks who had been hired to move crates around.”

“So, what did you do?”

“Well, speaking of Inuzuri punks, I may have been a fairly honest and hardworking fellow, but one day, a couple of my reprobate neighbors decided to sneak in and try to get a glimpse of some of the wild animals. The fellow who looked after the menagerie was a little guy by the name of Mameji. Very kind and loved the animals deeply, but not very good at standing up for himself. I barely knew him, but I don’t like bullies, and I owed most of those guys a punch in the nose anyway. Mameji was pretty grateful for the solid I did him and asked if there was any favor he could do me in return. Naturally, I asked if he knew Zaraki, but unfortunately, he was terrified of the guy, so I told him I was just happy to do a good deed and make a friend.”

“You should have asked him if he knew Rukia. Rukia likes animals.”

“You’re very smart, Sado, but remember that this story is about me, not you. It didn’t matter anyway, because the next day, he comes to find me and says there’s someone who wants to talk to me. I can’t imagine who he means, aside from holding out hope that maybe he did know Zaraki after all and was just slow-rolling me.”

“But it was Rukia.”

“It was. Mameji leads me over to the area where the animals are kept, and there, in a blue kimono embroidered with silver stars and crystals in her hair, was The Fearless Rukia.” Rukia’s circus stories were usually at least seventy-five percent descriptions of her outfits, and Renji felt obligated to keep up that detail. “‘You helped my friend out,’ she says to me. ‘I appreciate that.’ And I replied something very smooth and suave, like, ‘I like the way you do cartwheels’ or possibly just “Guuuuuuh.’ And then she says, ‘I hear you’re interested in Zaraki, what’s up with that?’ and as you know, I’m much better at talking about muscle stuff, so I explain about picking up heavy things and Inuzuri and my ambition to join the circus and she just listens carefully, nodding from time to time. She makes me pick up a few barrels and then Mameji, for good measure, and finally, she nods and says, ‘You’re pretty strong and I like your hair. Come back here tomorrow. I’m going to help you impress Zaraki.’”

Chad’s eyes sparkled with anticipation.

“So, the next day, I came back, like she said, and Mameji was there, too and they’ve got this big sack of yams. I’ve told you before about eatin’ in Soul Society, right?”

Chad nodded and belatedly took another gulp of his shake.

“My initial thought was that they were gonna try to bulk me up. Raw yams may not sound very exciting to you, but after years of living on near-moldy rice and the occasional sad vegetable or bony fish, I was watering at the mouth. ‘You’re gonna feed these yams to Sunny,’ says Rukia. ‘Who?’ says I. ‘His stage name is Brawler,’ says Rukia, ‘But he’s a good boy so Mameji and I call him Sunny. It’s a joke. Because he’s a moon bear.’ Brawler, you see, was the second scariest thing in the circus, right after Zaraki-- the biggest, ugliest moon bear you can possibly imagine, probably 200 kilograms. A lot of circus bears do tricks-- balance on balls or some shit, but Brawler’s only trick was looking mean as Hell. Sometimes they’d throw him a deer haunch and he’d eat it in a real gross way, I guess people like seeing stuff like that. I, like most people growing up on the southern border of the Rukon, had a healthy fear of large carnivores, but I had a much larger fear of looking like a weenie in front of Rukia, and I was determined I was gonna do whatever she told me to. The first time wasn’t so bad-- I just tossed the yams in and he snuffled over and gave me the hairy eyeball before snorfling them up. We did that the next day, too, but the day after that, Mameji took me into his enclosure to give him his yams. I was a little surprised, you see, because I would have expected a bear like that to eat meat or something like that, but he sure did like those yams.”

“Moon bears are omnivores,” Chad supplied. “They like sweet things.”

“You’re right, and I later found out that Sunny did get meat and other stuff at other times of day, but yams were his absolute favorite thing. Again, Rukia did not tell me this, because Rukia often neglects to tell me important things. I found all of this to be absolutely terrifying, and I probably would have given up and stuck to my crate moving, except that Rukia and Mameji were just about the nicest and amazing people I had ever met. They let me hang out with them for a bit and they told me stories about traveling with the circus and I told them about Inuzuri. They introduced me to their other friends, Fujimaru, who could do all sorts of knife throwing tricks, and Kosaburou, who had the most beautiful singing voice you could possibly imagine. By the time Rukia asked me to give Sunny the yams right out of my hand, I was doin’ it, not because I was desperate to get out of Inuzuri, but because I was desperate to do anything to stay with my new friends.”

Renji paused and pretended to be interested in his protein shake. Usually, he tried to fill these stories with a lot of daring-do and badassery, but he’d gotten a little off-track when had to junk his big exciting Rukia versus Bear fight scene. All he could think of was lying around the squat on miserable rainy days, one-upping each other with stories about their ridiculous circus acts. He hadn’t thought about those days-- hadn’t let himself think about those days-- in years. What a sap he was turning into. Maybe it was because Rukia was back in his life. Maybe it was because there was a war coming, a war he might not make it through. Maybe it was because it was two a.m.

“I know how that feels,” Chad said very quietly, so quietly that Renji almost didn’t catch it, and it occurred to Renji that maybe sometimes it helped to hear a sappy story at 2 a.m.

Renji snorted softly. “So, the day before the circus was set to pack up, Rukia explains her big plan to me. Up until now, I’ve sort of been assuming that this is all an exercise in building courage or some gonzo shit like that, but it turns out it’s very straightforward. Zaraki’s dream the whole time he’s been in the circus is to pick up Sunny as part of his act, except that Sunny has zero interest in being picked up and ends up chewing on Zaraki’s head every time he tries. If Zaraki had ever bothered asking Mameji for help, maybe he could have tried the old yam trick himself, but then this wouldn’t be much of a story.

“I wait ‘til the big guy is done with his nap and is prepping for the night’s performance, inventorying his lead pipes and such, and I go up to him and I say, ‘Zaraki the Great, I am very strong, you should take me on as your apprentice!’ Now, Rukia had seen people do this to him before, and she knew that he always came back with ‘Oh, yeah? Do something to impress me, then.’ Of course, I was prepared, and I said, ‘I am going to pick up Brawler, would that do it?’ and Zaraki laughs in my face and says ‘If you can do that, I will definitely take you on, kid.’”

Chad’s face had split into a huge grin and he leaned forward in anticipation.

“We go over to Sunny’s pen, and of course, Mameji’s already given him his dinner and he’s feelin’ real fat and happy when he sees his old yam buddy Renji coming. I slip him a yam that I had tucked in my sleeve and I start rubbin’ his side, which is a thing we’d been practicin’. He leans into it, ‘cause he was a big, itchy boy, and I just… flipped him and picked him up like a baby.” Renji made a scooping motion to demonstrate. Chad’s face absolutely lit up. “He was incredibly heavy and also he did not really like that,” Renji continued, “but I put him down right away and gave him another yam and he forgave me. Zaraki was laughin’ his ass off, but he kept his word and got me signed on as a Strongman-in-Training. We went on to have many more adventures, both me an’ Zaraki and me an’ Rukia an’ Mameji an’ Kosaburou and Mameji.”

“And Sunny.”

“Sunny continued to be a hideous, angry bear for the crowds, but I kept giving him yams and never picked him up again and we were great friends for the time we spent together in the circus.”

Chad sat back, smiling his usual inscrutable smile. “Thank you, Abarai. That was a really good one.”

Renji cocked an eyebrow at him. “Was it?”

“Yes. It had friendships and a nice bear and I felt like Rukia would really appreciate the effort you put into describing all her outfits. I’m pretty sure it wasn’t true, but it was a good story.”

Renji heaved a big sigh, as though he’d honestly thought Chad was gonna buy it this time. He stretched his arms and legs out in front of him. “Let’s go home. I could go for a few hours of sleep before the Shouten Shouting starts. You’re taking a rest day tomorrow, but don’t forget to stretch.”

“The last time I had a rest day, you came over and you taught me some stuff about reiryouku.”

“Did I?” Renji frowned.

“Can we do that again? You said you would try to explain how flash step works.”

Shit, he did remember promising that. He’d just gotten overenthusiastic because it was nice to be the guy who knew things for a change. On the other hand, he also remembered the enthusiasm of going to school for the first time and wanting to know everything, and could hardly fault Chad for the same. “Sure,” he agreed. “After noon.”

“Let’s make it noon,” Chad amended. “I’ll make you tacos.”

“That,” replied Renji, “is a deal.”

[one-boring-person]

Heyy 😊👉🏼👈🏼 it’s me again... I know that I literally just requested one, and received, which you did a fantastic job on btw! I’m like in a Top Gun love state right now, and I wanna warn you like I will probably be like a repeat customer 😅 so if it is not too much to ask, whenever you feel like, could I have a maverickxreader where he admires reader from afar and Goose knows he likes her and messes with him and somehow Goose helps them get together 😘😘 I’m sorry if it’s too soon 🤞🏽❤️

Of course, I'm glad you liked the first one!!💛💛

Buy Her A Drink.

Pete "Maverick" Mitchell x reader

Warnings: alcohol consumption

Masterlist

"...Earth to Maverick? You there?" A familiar voice calls over the loud music, a hand waving in front of my face to get me to tear my eyes away from the point I'm staring at, my gaze easily finding Goose as he passes me a beer, smirking knowingly at me as he leans back against the bar.

"Where else would I be?" I respond, taking a deep drink from the bottle, my eyes quickly flicking back to the object of my focus, a sigh inadvertently escaping me as I watch her.

"In (Y/n)-dreamland, I reckon." The RIO points out, laughing as my head snaps round to face him, "Oh come on, you're not exactly being discreet!"

Frowning, I look down as a blush starts to creep up my neck, the bottle returning to my lips as I deny him.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Goose scoffs, rolling his eyes dramatically at the look on my face, looking over in the direction I was staring in, still grinning.

"Oh yeah? So you haven't been making heart eyes at her for the last month, hmm?" He lifts an eyebrow, nudging me as he gestures in (Y/n)'s direction, "Last time I checked, you haven't been able to get enough of her since we first got here."

"Stop it." I warn him, setting my jaw as he makes a noise of amusement.

"What? I'm just pointing out the facts." He grins widely at me, "Remember when we first flew together and you let her take the finishing shot? First time that's ever happened. And the time when we were playing volley ball altogether, when you let her win everytime?"

"I never let her take the first shot, or let her win. She's just a really good flyer, and she won all the games fair and square!" I protest, waving off his points as a blush continues to cover my cheeks, taking a sip of the beer to disguise it.

"Keep telling yourself that, Mav. I'm not the only one who remembers you getting all flustered that time when it was so hot her uniform was sticking to her skin. You couldn't keep your eyes off her." Goose remarks, leaning back against the bar with a conspiratorial smirk.

By now, my cheeks are probably bright red, my jaw clenched painfully as I recall that time, my eyes now finding the skilled pilot across the room from me, eyeing her as she jokes around with Iceman and Slider, the three of them having grown particularly close over our time at Top Gun. At the sight of them, I feel my teeth grind together, though I force myself to relax as I admire her appearance instead, subtly observing how her uniform hugs the curves of her body, and how her hair is neatly styled despite her more relaxed demeanor, the bottle in her hand appearing half empty from where I am. Her smile seems to light up the room as the three of them burst into laughter, her hand reaching out to rest against Iceman's arm in what is probably a purely platonic manner,

"Just buy her a drink or something, man. I'm sure she likes you back." My RIO encourages me, looking me in the eye as he says this, completely serious despite the grin still on his face.

"She looks happy enough with Ice and Slider." I grumble in response, finishing the rest of my beer in one long drag, turning and slamming the bottle on the bartop, trying to fight the urge to keep watching her, knowing I'm probably coming across as creepy.

"Oh come on, don't be like that, Mav! I think she'd much prefer your company. She does keep looking over, after all." Goose consoles me, wrapping an arm around my shoulders reassuringly as I look over at him.

"She doesn't." I murmur quietly.

"And how would you know?" He smirks again, knowing that I've been watching her nearly the entire night, "I tell you what, I'll help you out. Cath you later, man."

Before I can protest, he's gone, giving me one last part on the back as he goes, a few bills left on the counter for me to use, an unspoken rule we've always had: if trying to persuade the other to get a girl, we always pay for each other's first drinks. It helped get Carole and Goose together, but unfortunately it hasn't yet helped me. Growling to myself, I snatch up the notes and stuff them in my pocket, straightening and turning, banging into someone immediately, my hands instantly coming out to steady them as they yelp and stumble backwards, their drink spilling over our shirts.

My eyes widen as they find the person in my arms to be (Y/n), her own eyes locking with mine briefly, before she looks away, chuckling awkwardly, a blush dusting her cheeks, her own hands wiping at her front.

"Err, hey? Goose said you wanted to talk to me?" She questions me, looking up at me imploringly, features softer in the dim light, giving her a different appearance to the experienced pilot I know on the runway.

"Did he now?" I respond, fighting the urge to roll my eyes, "I'm really sorry about your drink. Want another? It's on me."

A grin spreads across her face at my offer, the pilot nodding softly at me as she moves to sit on a barstool beside me, uncaring of her now-damp uniform, telling me her order. Requesting it from the bartender, I scan the room for Goose, quickly locating him next to Sundown, shooting him a scowl as he lifts his bottle in salute, grinning at me.

"So what was it you wanted to say to me?" (Y/n) inquires as she receives her drink, eyeing me carefully as I adjust myself unsure of what to say.

"I think Goose made that up so you would come talk to me, actually." I admit, looking down at the bottle in my hand, embarrassment rendering me incapable of keeping eye contact with her.

"Oh." She giggles, the sound storing itself in my memory as she takes a drink, her smile wide and cheerful, not weirded out at all, "Well, at least he succeeded."

"True." I murmur, finally mustering the courage to lock eyes with her again, drowning in their warm depths.

For a few minutes, we sit there in silence, during which I start to doubt myself, my self esteem lowering even further as I struggle to come up with a topic of conversation, my head suddenly going blank for the first time in my life. Beside me, (Y/n) quietly drinks from the glass in front of her, clearly having the same problem as I am, fingers tracing idle patterns on the smooth counter. Looking over at her, I finally decide that I've had enough of this, turning to face her properly, drawing her attention to me almost immediately, confusion etched into her face.

"Goose got you to come over here because he wants me to admit to you that I like you, because he thinks that you like me back, which is ridiculous because I'm not your type at all, and I'm probably not what you're looking for, and I'm too nervous to make a move anyway, so he got you over here when he knows I've had a bottle or two of beer to loosen my tongue, so that I will finally confess to yo-" I gush out, rambling on as I try to organise my thoughts into one steady stream.

"Wait, you like me?" She suddenly cuts me off, having gauged something from the tirade of words.

I freeze in place before replying, unsure if how she'll react.

"...Yeah, I really do. I think you're amazing, the way you fly is incredible and you're a really nice person in general. You're sweet and funny, and I don't think I've ever come across someone who actually tolerates my flying style like you do, so yeah, I like you."

She is quiet for a minute or so, the suspense killing me as I prepare to make my excuses, ready to up and leave in case this now gets awkward. When she does speak, I try to expect the worst, knowing I'll be rejected.

"I mean I wish you'd told me sooner. At least the I could've spent less time fretting over whether you liked me back or not." She finally comments, remarks offhanded and surprising, my mind having to replay the words a few times before I actually understand what she means.

"You like me, too?!" I nearly exclaim in disbelief, happiness exploding inside me as she nods, reaching a hand over the table to lace our fingers together, a soft smile gracing our lips as we look at each other.

"I do, but you're gonna have to take me on a date before we make this official." (Y/n) chuckles, making eye contact with me.

"Well, in that case," I take her hand and press her knuckles to my lips, kissing the soft skin with a smirk, "Wanna go on a date with me?"

[petersasteria]

Rumor Has It - Tom Holland (High School AU)

Pairing:  Jock!Tom x Musical!Reader, BFF!Haz x Reader

This is my entry for @t-holland2080‘s writing challenge, but since I took a writing break from here, I didn't write it. The prompt was an Adele related quote and tbf, I've had this idea for about a month. So, I thought of mixing them up together. I've been re-watching Glee. Hence, the high school au and the Glee inspired stuff throughout this one shot.

Prompt: "You're so dramatic." "That's rich coming from the person who acts like everything is an Adele song."

Add yourself to my taglist if you’re cool x

5.3k words omg lmao hope y’all enjoy I guess

Part 2

* * * *

Rumors. No one liked them, but every day there seemed to be a rumor made up by someone. Rumors tear other people down in a lot of ways. The idea of lies spreading everywhere wasn't ideal for everyone, yet people seem to really believe them. No one knows who starts a new rumor and no one knows how they come up with it. Rumors are basically the outcome of a person's creativity put into terrible, terrible use.

Last week, someone spread a rumor about you getting your lips fixed even though you didn't. Whoever said it was clearly false, because you wouldn't want to put your talent at risk even though it wouldn't really affect your voice.

The rumors had different themes every week. Last week, it was all about someone getting any part of their body changed. This week, however, was all about break ups. Of course, your relationship with Tom wasn't spared by that rumor.

You were dating a popular guy. Of course they'll be rumors about you two breaking up. Only this time, it felt real.

Everyday you felt like Tom was slipping away from you and you didn't want that. You didn't want your favorite person out of your life yet. You've only been dating for a year and a half and you actually planned to have a future with him. You were sure.

You already had everything planned out. You were moving to New York to pursue your Broadway dreams and Tom would move with you. Both of you were applying for colleges there and you were so excited.

You were settling with him. The only question you asked yourself every night was: 'Is Tom settling for me too?' You weren't stupid, though. You knew you were losing him to the captain of the cheer leading squad. How cliché, right? He would always talk about her, he would talk to her, walk her to class and go as far as comparing her to you. It hurt. What hurt most was that he didn't even notice he was doing all of those things.

"So what'll you do with the whole Tom and what's-her-name thing?" Harrison asked you when you both entered the glee club's classroom. "I know this week's rumor is all about break ups and shit. I don't even know why rumors have themes but it is what it is, I guess. But anyway, I heard from Lauren who heard from Samantha who heard from Dylan who heard from Adam that Tom was leaving you for her."

You sighed and shook your head, "Let's not talk about it, okay? But I'm expecting that he'll break up with me soon. I mean, I won't be surprised because the rumors of our break up are beginning to come true."

"Just know that no matter what happens, I'm here for you." Harrison smiled as both of you took your seat. You looked at him and smiled as you took his hand in yours and squeezed it. It was your way of saying thank you.

This week's glee club assignment was to sing an Adele song and you loved it. You loved Adele. Her songs held so much angst and you live for it. Sometimes, you thought that Adele was taking over your life because some of her songs matched every situation in your life.

Out of all of Adele's songs, you didn't know what to sing. Thankfully, Tom helped you out by breaking up with you the next day over the phone.

"Tom, we had plans for New York!" You pleaded.

Tom rolled his eyes and huffed, "Those are YOUR plans! If you want to move to New York so much, then move there with your loser best friend, Harvey!"

"His name is Harrison-"

"I don't fucking care. Move there with him if you want to move there so much. I want to move to L.A. I don't fit in at New York, Y/N." Tom sighed. "We both want different things and with her, it's different in a good way. We both want the same things and I can see myself having a great future with her."

"What about me?" You asked softly.

"What about you?" Tom furrowed his eyebrows. He just wanted to end the conversation already because he was preparing to get ready for a date.

"A-At some point, " You started. "Did you ever see yourself having a great future with me?"

Tom paused for a second and thought about it. Did he? Sure, he loved you at some point and he cared about you. He didn't know when he stopped. But he knew that he still cared about you. You were his first real girlfriend.

"I, uh, honestly? Of course I did. We've been together for a year and a half and I loved you and cared about you. Please don't doubt that." Tom answered.

"Well, what does she have that I don't?" You questioned even though you wished he wouldn't answer it because it would hurt you.

"She's all the things you're not, Y/N." Tom said. "She's not too focused on her career. She's not too competitive and she doesn't sing show tunes all the fucking time."

You stayed quiet as tears streamed down your face. 'So that's what he thinks of me.' You thought to yourself.

"Look, Y/N. I'm really really sorry." Tom said through the phone as you cried your eyes out. "I loved you. I really did, but I don't love you anymore. There's someone-"

"There's someone else. I know. It's the cheer leading captain." You cried. "I get it, though. She has everything that I don't have and it makes sense how you'd go after a girl like her because both of you are perfect for each other. But just remember that there's one thing I can do that she can't."

"What's that?"

"She can't love you like I can. But you're willing to throw that away so goodbye, Thomas." You sniffed and wiped your tears away with your free hand.

"Bye, Y/N. Don't be a stra-"

You quickly hung up and cried. You hastily called Harrison and he went to your house as soon as he could with post-break up items. When he arrived, he ran straight to your room and you pulled him in for a hug.

"He's an asshole, I swear!" Harrison said as he pulled away and put the stuff he brought on your bed. You wiped your tears and looked at it, "What the hell is that?"

"It's a post-break up kit that I made." Harrison proudly said. "I know it's a little big than a usual kit but I don't know what else to call it. Inside, there's a bottle of wine, some popcorn, chips and a ton of flyers from different pizza places all stapled together for when you want to buy some pizza."

"That's so thoughtful of you." You chuckled. "What made you do this?"

"Well, my sister had her first ever heartbreak a few months back and as her older brother, it's my job to make sure she gets treated the way men should treat her. Then my cousin got heartbroken and I gave her a post-break up kit too. She told me it works." Harrison smiled. "You're my third customer, y'know. I refuse to let my favorite girl get heartbroken over some guy."

"Hey, he's not just some guy." You argued as you peeked inside the post-break up kit.

"Fine. He's not." Harrison said as he got the stapled flyers from the kit. "He may not be just some guy for you, but you're just some girl for him. I don't want my best friend to be just some girl. In fact, I don't want the girls in my life; my mum, my sister, my cousin, my niece when she grows up or who else, become just 'some girl' to some guy who can't appreciate what they have. All of you are special and you all deserve to feel special because all of you are amazing." He looked at you as you sat down on your bed. He sat next to you.

"I'm sorry if it sounded harsh, but you deserve the truth and the truth always hurts. I'm just keeping it real with you." He added.

You sighed, "I just- I miss being his, y'know? I miss being his girl, his everything and all that."

Harrison scoffed and shook his head, "In case you didn't know, you haven't been his girl ever since he started looking at what's-her-name's way. You haven't been his girl ever since he didn't walk you home. You haven't been his girl when he didn't pick you up after glee club meetings and you haven't been his girl when when started comparing her to you."

"You deserve better than that, Y/N. I know it's not my place to say anything at all, but you should've left him when he started slipping away because that's when it usually starts." Harrison said and suddenly the wall started to look interesting to him. "They start slipping away but you stay because you believe that they'll come to their senses and come back. But they don't. Then you blame yourself for not being good enough when they leave you. It's always like that. So, if you ever feel like someone's slipping away from you, just leave and make your life easier."

"I don't know what to say except you're right." You nodded. "Also, you're so dramatic." You chuckled as you looked at each other.

Harrison playfully rolled his eyes and smiled, "That's rich coming from the person who acts like everything is an Adele song."

"Speaking of Adele, I know what to sing for the glee club assignment." You said as you took out the bottle of wine from the kit Harrison gave you.

"And what song would that be?" Harrison asked.

"Someone Like You." You said as you stood up and walked out of your room to get two glasses for your wine.

When you left, Harrison said to himself, "Huh. Queen shit right there. I love that fucking song. Now, I don't know what to fucking sing for the assignment."

You came back in the room and Harrison said, "I'll order us pizza."

"Okay. Thanks." You smiled.

When Monday came, it was hard to look at Tom because he was with that girl he left you for. Lucky for you, Harrison was there and never left your side. When the time for glee club came, you told your teacher that you were ready to sing your song.

"I heard that you settled down, that you found a girl and you're married now." You sang beautifully and everyone was in awe. Especially Harrison. It was at that moment that he knew he liked you and that he'll do anything for you.

"Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead." You ended the song and smiled as everyone clapped. You went back to your seat next to Harrison and he smiled at you.

"You were great." Harrison grinned. "I think you'll do just fine without Tom."

You smiled at him and didn't say anything. Eventually, he was right. You were able to move on from Tom after two weeks of moping around for him. You realized you didn't want to waste your time in moping around for some guy who left you for someone else. Great stars became great stars when they were single.

Rumors. Rumors spread everywhere and they spread all the time. This week's theme of rumors were about new couples. Of course, Tom and that other girl were being talked about. They were the new 'it couple'. Rumors about you and Harrison dating were being surfaced. Of course, you didn't confirm nor deny them. No one should really care whether you two were together or not.

The truth was, you only went out on a couple of dates which you both enjoyed. You and Harrison weren't official yet, though. You were taking it slow.

On the flip side, Tom was bothered that you seemed to have forgotten all about him. He thought you would beg for him and he was kind of hurt that you didn't beg for him. It hurt his ego.

So when you were alone one day, Tom approached you when he saw you putting your things in your locker. "Hey Y/N." Tom smiled at you.

You looked at him and raised an eyebrow at him. It was weird that he spoke to you at all after the break up. He was the one who broke up with you over the phone and it confused you that he was talking to you. "Um, what do you want?" You asked.

"Ouch. Is that how you talk to the love of your life?" Tom put a hand on his chest, pretending to be hurt.

You rolled your eyes and closed your locker as you clutched your book tighter, "You haven't been the love of my life for, like, two weeks now. Get over yourself, Holland. If you're to ask help in studying, I won't help you. That's what your girlfriend is for. You told me that she's all the things I'm not. So, I assume that she's smarter than me."

Tom was about to talk when Harrison interrupted and looked between you and Tom, "What's going on here?"

You've never been more relieved in your life. You smiled at Harrison and shook your head, "Nothing important."

Harrison nodded and turned to you, "C'mon! I promised I'd take you out for lunch today."

You grinned, "Oh, right!"

"You'd love the place, I swear!" He offered his hand to you and you happily grabbed it.

"Bye, Thomas." You smiled politely before Harrison dragged you out of school. You laughed causing Harrison to laugh too.

Tom watched both of you leave the school premises and frowned. You've never rejected him before. He kind of always expected you to choose him all the time above all circumstances and he was surprised that you didn't. What did Harrison have that he didn't? He knew it was kind of silly to react this way, but he wasn't used to it. Right now, he hated Harrison for changing you. He never really had a problem with Harrison before, but right now Harrison was his enemy because he stole you away from him.

Tom had been acting weird around you lately and you wanted to file a restraining order, but Harrison said it was too much. At this point, you've been going out on dates with Harrison two months now. Both of you wanted to make it official, but both of you didn't know that.

"I'm sorry I can't attend glee club today and walk you home." Harrison said guiltily. You shook your head and said, "Haz, it's alright. Your family is important and tell Charlotte I said good luck."

Harrison smiled, "I will. Don't enjoy glee club too much without me."

"Trust me when I tell you that I won't enjoy it all without you. You make my glee club experience easier and more fun." You looked at him and tucked your hair behind your ear.

Harrison laughed and shook his head, "Oh, I could just kiss you right now!"

Your jaw dropped and his eyes widened in realization. You looked at each other and he spoke up, "Uh, forget I said anything."

"Did you mean it?" You asked. Harrison sighed and nodded. You smiled and said, "Kiss me, then."

"But I thought we were taking it slow? I don't want to force you in any-"

"Shut up and kiss me, Haz! We've been going on dates for two months now. I think it's time we make it official." You chuckled. "So if you want to kiss me so bad, go ahead, Osterfield. I dare you."

“Will you be my girlfriend?”

“Fuck yeah!”

He smirked and leaned in to place a sweet kiss on your lips. You kissed back and smiled through the kiss. Both of you pulled away and blushed.

"Okay, Charlotte will kill me if I'm late to watch her performance. I'll text you, okay?" Harrison held your hand and placed a kiss on it. "See you tomorrow!"

"Okay. Tell me all about it." You grinned as you watched him leave the school. You turned around to walk to the glee club's room and bumped into Tom.

"Where's your best friend? I don't see him around." Tom said as he put his hands in his pockets.

"My BOYFRIEND just left. He had to leave to watch his sister's performance at school." You told him and went around him to leave. Tom grabbed your wrist and you sighed, "What now, Thomas? Isn't Madison going to be jealous or something? I really don't have time for drama in my life."

"Leave Harrison. I want to be with you again." Tom blurted out and you laughed, "Sure, you do. Bye now." He let go of your wrist and you walked away and went to glee club.

It's been three days since that encounter with Tom and Harrison wasn't pleased with what happened. You assured him that you wouldn't leave him for Tom no matter what happens. You and Harrison have been rehearsing non-stop for sectionals with the rest of your glee club and today's the day that you'll perform.

All of you were backstage getting ready and Tom made his way to you. He huffed and he saw you kissing Harrison so he cleared his throat causing both of you to pull away. Harrison glared at Tom, but he didn't want to start a fight. He was better than that.

Harrison pecked your lips and said, "I'll check with Mike, okay?"

You smiled and nodded. He left and you looked at Tom with your arms crossed, "What're you doing here?"

"I'm here to see you perform. It's a big crowd out there." Tom chuckled as he handed you a bouquet of flowers. "These are for you."

You took them and set it on the vanity, "Thanks. You never came to any of my performances so why are you really here?"

"I came to watch you perform. I realized that I haven't really been supportive of you when we were dating and I wanted that to change. And if you liked New York so much, I'm willing to do long distance and I could visit you whenever I can." Tom explained.

"It's too late for that, don't you think?" You laughed. "Besides, we don't match. L.A. screams your name and New York screams mine. New York also screams Harrison's name and we already agreed that we'd move there together. You have Madison now and you're the one who broke up with me, Tom. Not the other way around."

"I know, but I'm leaving her for you. I'm planning to." Tom said.

"What the hell is your goal here? You came all this way to tell me this?" You asked. You were annoyed and kind of pissed. You just wanted to perform now, but the fifteen minute intermission was taking too long to end.

He shrugged, "Well, yeah. I know that once you leave him for me, you'll be all over me and we could be happy again. Then maybe I could convince you to move to L.A. instead of New York. Broadway is dead, anyway. You could audition for tv or movie roles and-"

"No, Tom!" You hissed. "Broadway is my calling. I've been preparing my whole life for Broadway and you can't take that away from me. If you want to move to L.A., that's on you. Don't drag me into it and I won't leave him for you. If leaving your partner for someone else is your cup of tea, then leave me out of it. I can't do that to Harrison. He's amazing and we're moving to New York together and that’s final."

"Show time, everyone!" a voice called out. You looked at Tom and said, "You're welcome to stay and watch, but don't bother me and Haz anymore. You don't get to do that after you've made up your mind on leaving me for Madison."

You walked to your glee club members and put on a smile. You refuse to let Tom's presence distract you. After all, you were performing with Harrison and you were finally getting the solo you deserved. It was your time to shine indeed. Nothing can ruin it for you.

Tom left and went back to his seat. As soon as he sat down, a familiar tune started to play and your clear and beautiful voice was heard in the whole venue. Tom was glad that his seat was on the third row from the stage and he was able to watch you properly. This was his first time seeing you perform and he wanted to make the most of it.

"Times have changed and we've often rewound the clock. Since the Puritans got a shock when they landed on Plymouth Rock." You sang as you stood on the center of the stage with your other glee club members still standing on the side of the stage, waiting for their cue to enter.

"If today," Your eyes met Tom and he gave you a smile and a small thumbs up. You stayed in character, though and paid no mind to him which he didn't take personally. The rest of the club marched on stage and went to their positions.

"Any shock they should try to stem 'stead of landing on Plymouth Rock, Plymouth Rock would land on them." You pointed at the audience with a smile.

You glanced at Harrison and you both shared a small smile before you looked back at the audience for all of you to sing, "In olden days, a glimpse of stocking was looked on as something shocking, but now, God knows... Anything goes!"

"Good authors, too, who once knew better words, now only use four letter words writing prose... Anything goes!" You sang and dance with Harrison as your partner, of course. As part of the choreography, you slightly pushed Harrison away and pointed at him, "Anything you can be, I can be greater. Sooner or later, I'm greater than you."

You stood at the side as everyone sang the "no, you're not" part while you sang the "yes, I am" part of the song. All of you danced beautifully when the instrumental part of the song came and everyone clapped and cheered. You were preparing yourself for the high note as everyone sang the ensemble part.

"I can hold any note longer than you." You sang as you walked to the center of the stage while everyone still danced behind you.

"No, you can't."

"Yes, I can. Yes, I..." You sang and held the note. You've been practicing it for weeks and you were glad that you pulled it off really well. Your voice was loud, clear, and powerful and it overpowered your fellow glee club members' voices.

You took a deep breath for the climax of the song, "Yes, I can!"

Tom was the first one to stand up and cheer as soon as the song ended. The rest of the audience followed. All of them sat down when all the girls left the stage for the boys to do their performance. You sneakily kissed Harrison on the cheek for good luck and Tom saw it and he was admittedly jealous. He couldn't believe that he thought leaving you for Madison was a good idea.

He wanted to leave then and there, but he wanted to see what you saw in Harrison that made you choose him. The music began and Tom sat comfortably on his seat.

"Boy, boy, crazy boy, Get cool, boy! Got a rocket in your pocket. Keep coolly cool, boy!" Harrison sang as he moved around on stage with the rest of the boys just standing behind him like they rehearsed.

"Don't get hot, 'Cause man, you got some high times ahead. Take it slow and Daddy-O," Harrison looked at Tom and continued, "You can live it up and die in bed!"

Tom glared at him as Harrison continued to sing and dance with the rest of the boys. "That bastard, I swear." Tom mumbled under his breath.

Harrison finished the song with a cool pose. Everyone clapped as Tom rolled his eyes. All the boys ran off the to the side of the stage.

"Good luck." Harrison whispered in your ear before you went out there. All of you girls went on stage to sing 'It's All Over' from Dream Girls. You didn't have the main solo for this one, but you still had a solo. You were singing Beyonce's lines and you were excited. Besides, this was your time to put your acting skills into use.

Mercedes, your main soloist for this song, was doing so well and you were really glad that she got the solo she deserved.

"She ain't better than anybody. She ain't nothing but common!" She sang. You got into character and walked towards her, "Now, who you callin' common you self-indulgent, self-absorbed and unprofessional?"

"You! I'm calling you, I'm calling you, the common piece is knocking off!" Mercedes sang with a raised eyebrow and walked past you. You turned around and walked after her, "Now you listen to me, Miss Blame-It-On-The-World; see I put up with you for much too long."

"I have put up with your bitchin'." You pushed her.

"I've put up with your naggin'." You pushed her again. "And all your screamin' too!"

After a few more lines, it was your solo again, "She had nothing to do with this change. It was you! It was you always thinking of you. Always thinking of you!"

When the song ended, the boys joined the rest of you as all of you formed one straight line on stage with you and Harrison in the middle which annoyed Tom so much, but he didn't react.

You and Harrison looked at each other before looking at the audience. Both of you started the song without music, "Do you hear the people sing lost in the valley of the night? It is the music of the people who are climbing to the light. For the wretched of the earth, there is a flame that never dies. Even the darkest night will end and the sun will rise."

The music started and the rest joined in for the next lines. When all of you harmonized together, you could've sworn you saw someone crying on the first row.

"Tomorrow comes!" You all sang and it gave the audience goosebumps.

When your group was announced as the champion, you were really happy. Tom cheered too. He now understood why you loved glee club. He saw your passion for performing and you were right; New York was screaming your name. Broadway really was for you. He could picture you in two different places, on stage and in his arms. It was cheesy and probably corny, but it was true.

-

Today was the day you and Harrison were moving to New York and you were excited. Both of you got accepted into NYADA and you already bought an apartment together using both of your savings and with some additional help from both of your parents.

Tom knew you were leaving today that’s why he rushed to the airport to catch up with you. He looked around and saw you hugging your parents goodbye with Harrison next to you. He smiled to himself when he was able to get to you on time.

“Y/N!” Tom called out as he ran towards you.

You pulled away from your mom and furrowed your eyebrows when you saw Tom. Harrison wasn’t pleased to see him at all and you were tired of seeing Tom after he tried to get you back multiple times since sectionals.

“Tom, what’re you doing here? I’m leaving.” You frowned at him.

Harrison looked at your parents and his parents and said, “Um, let’s leave them to talk.” He gave you a small smile before walking away with your families. You sighed and crossed your arms as you stared at Tom.

“I know you’re leaving that’s why I’m here.” Tom said. “I wanted to tell you that I won’t stop until I get you back.”

“Tom, I’m with Harrison and I love him too much to leave him. We’ve already planned our future together and you’ll have that too, Tom. Just not with me.” You told him.

“Then I’ll move to New York too and- and I’ll look for jobs there and I’ll study there too. I just- I really, really want to be with you again.” Tom begged. “What do you want me to do?”

“Why are you doing this, anyway? You’ve been like this ever since Harrison and I started going out. What’s your deal?!” You said angrily. “Okay so, what if we got back together again and the same thing happens? I don’t want to go through that, Thomas.”

“It won’t happen again, I swear!”

“How do I know that? Because you said so?! Geez, how fucking assuring!” You scoffed.

“I thought I was the only one you loved. How come you love Harrison all of a sudden?” Tom said sadly.

You rubbed your face and sighed, “You’ll always have a special place in my heart, Tom Holland. Trust me. Maybe someday, we can be friends but not now; not when you’re fucking insane. You’re my first love, yes. First loves never really go away, but we do move on from them. I’d really want us to be friends, I really do. I want you and Haz to be friends too, but you’re making it difficult.”

Suddenly, it was announced that your flight was already boarding. You looked at Tom and held both of you hands, “On behalf of me and Harrison, I forgive you for all the times you tried to sabotage our relationship. If only you used all that energy in trying to be friends with me and Haz, then none of this wouldn’t happen and maybe I’d visit you in L.A.”

You pulled him in for a hug and Tom immediately hugged back tighter, “I’ll miss you, Y/N. I really will. I especially missed you when you weren’t with me.”

You lightly chuckled and pulled away, “No matter how much you claim to miss me, you can’t keep coming back to me whenever it’s convenient for you. Goodbye, Tom.”

Harrison walked towards both of you and he nodded at Tom, acknowledging his presence. You waved to your family before leaving with Harrison. Tom looked around and called out, “Hey Y/N!”

You looked at him and waited for him to say something.

“Don’t be a stranger!” Tom shouted and waved goodbye. You smiled at him and waved back. “I won’t!” You shouted back before you and Harrison boarded the plane.

“So, what did he say?” Harrison asked.

“We just said goodbye.” You responded. Harrison pursed his lips and nodded.

“Hey,” You grabbed Harrison’s hand and he looked at you. “I love you.”

He smiled, “I love you too. New York, here we come!”

You giggled as you went to your respective seats. You couldn’t wait to spend your time in New York with Harrison. Your dreams were finally coming true... with the right guy this time.

* * * *

𝐓𝐎𝐌 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @abrielleholland​​​​​​ @poguesholland​​​​​ @superheroesaremytea​​  @marshxx​​​ @ella-whyte @buckys-little-hoe @harryismysunflower

𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @marvelousell​​​​​ @justasmisunderstoodasloki​​​ @rubberducky-jrr​​​ @petersholland​​​ @osterfieldnholland​​​ @miraclesoflove​​​ @god-knows-what-am-i-doing

+ @greenorangevioletgrass bc musicals x

[angst-fairygodmother]

Puppy Love (A Light Fingers Moment In Between)

A/N: Sometimes I say words, and other people say words, and stuff happens. Part of me wants to say AU because it would be easier, but I love making things More Difficult on Purpose.  Word Count: 2333 Rating: G(eneral Audience)

You tapped Diego on the shoulder, nodding your head in the direction of the faint clatter you’d heard. 

The pair of you had popped in to stop a home invasion, but one of the perps had taken off with a priceless family heirloom, and you’d agreed to give chase. Unfortunately, he had a head start and you had lost him in the warren of a crowded parking garage. 

Diego pressed a finger to his lips and nodded, gesturing with his free hand for you to circle around while he approached from the front to draw attention.

You met his eyes for a brief moment, lower lip worrying between your teeth. You gave his arm a brief squeeze before nodding and setting off. No matter how long you’d been doing this, you worried about him when his plans worked out like this, with him picking fights so you could have the element of surprise. As you moved, quick and quiet, something felt wrong about the situation. Hesitantly, you fingered the knife that Diego had insisted you started carrying on these jobs, not pulling it out yet, but reassuring yourself that it was there and easily accessible. 

There was another scuffling sound and a soft whine, one that didn’t sound human. You picked up your pace now, running in the direction of the noises. There, huddled in the corner of the garage, caught and tugging on the corner of a dumpster, was a small, shivering dog. 

“Hi there,” you said softly, sinking low and holding your hand out as you crept closer to the frightened creature. 

You heard pounding footsteps behind you as Diego ran up, the sound making the dog yelp and try to cower more.

“Shh, shh,” you hummed, shifting to sit cross-legged in front of it, blocking it’s view of Diego, and giving you a more steady position to hold the little creature still while you unhooked it’s collar from the sharp, bent edge of the trash.

Once freed, you expected it to squirm in your arms or try to run, but instead, it stayed, pressed lightly against your leg, shivering. It was covered in so much mud you could hardly tell it was meant to be white and stank horribly (or maybe that was the bins), but you were pretty sure someone would be missing it. 

“Think you can find our bad guy on your own?” you murmured as Diego peered over your shoulder. “I don’t want to abandon this little one to its own devices.”

He couldn’t help chuckling. “Yeah, I got it. Meet you back here?”

“I’m not waiting for you by the dumpsters. I’ll meet you by the entrance.” 

~

After returning the expensive and hideous brooch to the family, and turning the would-be-burglars over to the cops, you and Diego made your way home, the little dog wrapped in a towel in your arms. The family hadn’t ever seen it around before, and the tag had the dog’s name, “Penny,” but no name or address of an owner.

“It’s alright Penny,” you told her as you walked. “We’ll get you cleaned up, take some nice pictures and put up flyers. I’m sure someone’s missing you and will be excited to have you home again soon.”

“Why don’t we just take it to the shelter?” Diego asked gruffly, trying to hide how cute he thought Penny was.

“Shelters are overcrowded and understaffed. They have a hard time caring for the dogs that need homes, let alone the ones that just got lost and get brought to them. Besides, I...want to make sure her family gets her back, and that’s easier to do if we make the handoff.”

Diego shook his head, slightly exasperated. “Fine. But if it takes more than a few days--”

“We’ll discuss that only if we have to.” You shifted the dog so that you would have a free hand and bopped Diego’s nose teasingly. “Don’t be a grump.”

He gaped at you. “For that, I’m not helping you wash it.”

“Of course you’re not, baby. You’re going out to buy kibble and a leash.” You smiled winningly at him.

~

Penny was with you for just over a week before you got a call during dinner one night. The man on the other end of the line said that he had seen your flyers and was sure that the dog you found belonged to his elderly mother. She had been worried sick when the dog slipped out, but hadn’t been able to follow it, and because of his work, he hadn’t been able to put out ‘missing’ posters. You told him you were glad he called and asked if he had evidence the dog was his or his mother’s. He told you he’d bring a picture of the two of them together, and arranged to meet you at Griddy’s Doughnuts the next morning. 

During the time she was there, Penny settled in quite well with you and Diego, excited when either of you left and came back, quite happy to sit on your laps while you watched tv or read at night, curling up at the foot of the bed when you went to sleep. She and Diego in particular, for all his protests, seemed inseparable. For all his protests at first, he seemed to enjoy all of her antics, and slipped her food off his plate when she gave him big sad eyes and he thought you weren’t paying attention. When you told him that her owner had finally called, he hid a frown behind a cough.

“Diego,” you sighed, seeing his face fall anyway. “You knew we couldn’t keep her…”

You were just as sad as he was, if you were being honest. You had never really imagined yourself a dog person, the idea of having a pet so far off your radar as to be unfathomable. But Penny had slotted into your lives like a missing piece, and as glad as you were to return her, safe and happy, to her home and the people that loved her, you and Diego loved her too.

“I know,” he said softly. “Just. It’ll be weird once she’s gone.”

You bit your lip, considering the words that bubbled up your throat before letting them fall from your tongue, nearly as impulsive as your marriage proposal.

“Ya know...we could...get a dog of our own?” you shrugged, trying to play off the idea as a casual thought.

~

It was hard not to be overwhelmed by the smell and sound within the shelter’s kennel area, over two dozen dogs baying, barking, and bouncing on the chain-link fencing as the pair of you were led through to an open area where you could do some meet and greets. 

Nervously you sat on the bench, fingers laced with Diego’s and running your thumb back and forth over his knuckles. 

“Hey,” he said, leaning in to whisper in your ear. “Talk to me.”

You shrugged, biting your lip. “I dunno. This just feels big, suddenly. And what if we can’t find one that likes both of us, or what if we fuck it up. I’ve never...taken care of another living thing before. Not by myself.”

“You take care of me all the time,” he said, tugging you into a hug. “And you won’t be alone. We’re in this together remember?”

Your smile was watery but genuine as you returned the hug, burying your face against his neck.

“How did I ever do shit without you?” you murmured, backing away but not fully letting go.

He didn’t have a chance to respond with more than a squeeze of your joined hands as Martin returned with the first dog. 

“I thought we’d start with some one-on-one interactions with a few dogs I think would be a good fit based on what you told me, and then we’ll see who clicks and you can have some time to play with the top two or three, pick from there.”

You nodded, holding your hand, palm out, toward the black lab tugging at the leash he held. He introduced her as Sheila, and while she seemed friendly, your heart wasn’t in it. The same feeling continued through several other perfectly nice dogs, and though you were both tempted by a roly-poly border collie puppy and by a sweet but very lazy bulldog, as soon as the handler had left the room with them, you’d looked at each other and known it wasn’t right. 

“Can we...maybe, just walk through the kennels and see if something I don’t know...calls to us?” you asked hesitantly after about the eighth dog you felt no real connection with. 

“Oh!” the man looked surprised you had even suggested it and took a long moment to process the request. “Sure, we can do that.”

Wrapping his arm around your shoulder, Diego pulled you against his side as the pair of you followed Martin back into the kennels.

“You know we don’t have to find a dog today, right?” he asked softly, sensing your continued nerves. “If nothing here works out, we’ll keep looking.”

“I know,” you sighed. “I just…got really excited, and now I feel like we failed or something.”

“Well, we haven’t yet.”

Suddenly, you stopped short, jerking Diego along with you, so quickly that your guide didn’t even notice. Staring up at you, his black fur almost lost in shadow but for his white bib, the boxer gave you the biggest, saddest eyes you had ever seen. Crouching down, you tentatively reached your hand outward, pressing it against the chainlink.

“Hi…” you cooed as he edged forward, crawling on his belly until he could sniff and then attempt to lick your fingers from the other side. 

Diego mirrored your stance, kneeling in front of the kennel door, and by the time Martin realized you were no longer behind him and doubled back, the pair of you were enraptured and the dog was no longer cowering, instead bouncing and pawing at the fence to try and get to you, tongue lolling out of his mouth and slobbering on as much of you as he could reach. 

“Oh,” he said, sounding almost disappointed. “You met Duncan…trust me, you don’t want him.”

“What?” you asked, whipping your head around to look at the man. “Why not?”

“He was born here, runt of the litter so for a while no one wanted him. Now he’s almost two and he’s ended up back here from four homes already. Can’t figure out why, but he just doesn’t work out.”

“Well there must be something going on,” you argued. “Or else that wouldn’t be true right?”

Martin shrugged. “I guess. But it ain’t my place. I just know the poor bastard’s probably going to live his whole life in there.”

“No,” Diego said, turning to you and smiling when you gave him a brief nod. “Because we’ll take him.”

“I really don’t think that’s a good idea. And it seems cruel to give him false hope a fifth time.”

“It won’t be false. We won’t give up on him,” you insisted. “I understand wanting to protect him, and us, but please. Just...trust us.”

“You’re sure there’s not another dog you want instead?”

“No,” Diego said firmly. “We want Duncan.”

At the sound of his name from Diego’s mouth, his ears perked up and he sat down patiently, expectantly almost.  

We know a thing or two about loving the unloved, you wanted to say, this was fate you wanted to argue. But how could you even begin?

“Let’s go take care of the paperwork and...see what my boss says.”

~

Later that night, as you rested your head against Diego’s chest on the couch, not really watching the movie on the tv, you found yourself anxiously drumming your fingers on his knee.

“Y/N,” he said knowingly, catching and stilling your hand, rubbing his thumb soothingly over your knuckles.

“Do you think they’ll approve us?” you asked, voicing the question on both your minds.

“I don’t know. We just have to wait,” he chuckled, shaking his head as you opened your mouth to interrupt, “patiently. And see what happens. Hope it’ll work out.”

You groaned. “Why do you have to be right all the time?”

“It’s a carefully honed talent.”

~

Diego’s keys jingled in the doorknob and you held your breath, praying that your companion would stay quiet.

“Just another minute boy,” you muttered. 

As soon as you heard the door shut behind your husband, you let go of Duncan’s collar and he bounded over, his entire body wriggling along with his stubby tail. Diego swore, startled by the dog’s sudden appearance from around the corner, and you couldn’t help laughing as you followed, more sedately behind.

“Wha—” Diego said, kneeling to ruffle Duncan’s ears, leaning away as his lolling tongue tried to lick his newly accessible face. 

“You didn’t steal him did you?” he asked, teasing smile lighting his features.

“I am hurt and offended that you would even suggest such a thing,” you said dramatically, a hand pressed to your chest for effect. “This was completely legitimate, and Duncan is now our dog. Or technically my dog, until you go sign your copy of the adoption contract tomorrow morning.”

“That’s...we have a dog…” he breathed, shock settling over him. 

“Diego, are you crying?” you asked gently, concern overriding your amusement. 

He was silent and you moved to his side, sitting down, next to your husband and dog and wrapping an arm around each of them.

“They’re happy tears right?” you asked, feeling some of your own building as it suddenly struck you that this right here was a family, a happy family, and all your own. 

“The happiest,” he murmured, managing a quick kiss to your temple just before the moment was broken by Duncan licking a long stripe up his cheek and flopping over onto your laps for a belly rub, sending you both into a fit of laughter.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

End Note: Is a studio apartment an appropriate space for a boxer? Should inexperienced owners adopt a dog that the shelter thinks is a “problem” dog? Probably not, as a rule. But individual dogs have individual needs, they’re active-lifestyle adults, we’ll assume there’s a dog park nearby, and also it’s fiction and I think it’s cute, so...

[gstqaobc]

FROM THE MONARCHIST LEAGUE OF CANADA

As this Ecomm went to publication, we received word of the death, at the great age of 96, of Bill Silver, a significant benefactor of the League from its early days, and for many years a pillar of our Ottawa Branch.  We wished to remember him here: his ebullient spirit, fierce loyalty spoken gently, innate modesty and kindness.  Indeed Chaucer might have had forethought of Bill in describing one of his characters as a “very parfitt gentle knight.” May his ardent spirit rest in peace, and his memory be a blessing and example to us all.   LEAGUE ISSUES NEW FLYER: THE CASE FOR THE CROWN The League thought it timely and useful to issue, offer in its advertising and distribute as widely as possible - both via the website and in printed form - a new flyer which will give you, our members, ammunition to argue logically the case for the Crown in conversation with others, and, we hope, to distribute strategically. One never knows when such an item, left on a waiting room table at the doctor or dentist’s office, affixed to a supermarket or other community bulletin board, put through neighbours’ mail slots - the possibilities are many - will do good work for our cause. We hope you will both enjoy and profit from this item, and that many thousands will be distributed across the country. See item one in the WHAT CAN I DO FOR THE CANADIAN CROWN? section of this Ecomm, below, to read online and request printed copies.   And special thanks to our wonderful team of no less than seven translators, all francophones from La Belle Province, who so kindly volunteered to make the French version one that is accurate in expression and eloquent in its prose.                     WHAT CAN I DO FOR THE CANADIAN CROWN? Some suggestions for member activity during these times. We invite members to send additional ideas by return of email. 1.    How about asking the League to send you several print copies of our new flyer:  THE CASE FOR THE CROWN, or print them on your home computer:  https://www.monarchist.ca/index.php/publications and give them to others who may be unaware or sceptical of the importance of Canada’s constitutional monarchy, or even hostile to it. School teachers could be encouraged to read the League’s educational booklets, also available both online and in print at the same URL, or even to request a class set.   2.    When you read an editorial, opinion column or letter to the editor in a newspaper, or a tweet or Facebook post, critical of the Crown, don’t get mad - get even! In other words, use a temperate tone and logical argument to refute the writer’s attack.  Keep it brief: focus on the obvious flaws in reasoning, mis-statements of fact or name-calling substituting for logic.  Same goes for radio talk shows. In the long run, on all media, whatever the provocation, whatever the momentary satisfaction of ”giving them a piece of my mind” - an old adage remains true: “You catch more flies with honey.” 3.    Write your elected representative at the federal level to re-state briefly the reasons you support constitutional monarchy as our system of government,  and asking the MP whether not your view is shared. 4.    Once pandemic restrictions ease, try to make sure that Royal events - such as the upcoming 95th birthday of our Queen, 10th Wedding Anniversary of William and Catherine or 100th birthday of Prince Philip are celebrated both in your home but also among your wider family, your friends, your colleagues at the office,  your place of worship/faith community or service club. The League generally sends you some ideas to mark these celebrations. Remember, as they are incorporated into family life and public life, the     Crown becomes further embedded in the heart of the nation, and truly represents The Queen’s wish that it ”reflects all that is best and most admired in the Canadian ideal.” This is especially true when you go out of your way to include in your observance the newest members of our Canadian family, who generally are eager to participate in the traditions of their new homeland, and in turn to share their own traditions with the wider community. 5.    Always use a Queen stamp when you write a letter or pay a bill by mail. 6.     At events of ceremony, whether a Council meeting, a graduation, a civic celebration - whatever - make sure that the Royal Anthem is sung as well as the National Anthem. To the extent you can, discourage event organizers from having a soloist “perform” them. Far more pride and         learning develop from the untrained voices of loyal folk singing together. In that way, the Anthems are sung “with heart and voice” and not merely listened to.   A FINAL IDEA: AN ACT OF LOVING SUPPORT & THANKS Apart from the above, we think it would be enormously comforting and supportive for every one of us to  write a kind letter to The Queen, expressing your thoughts at a difficult time: her beloved husband ailing, a grand-child chiding other family members via sensational television, the drumbeat of the tabloids and the restrictions on her busy life caused by the pandemic.  A selection of letters, especially those from Commonwealth Realms, are indeed seen by The Queen - and their number and tone are summarized to Her Majesty. The address is - Her Majesty The Queen, Buckingham Palace, London SW1A 1AA, UK Theoretically you don’t need postage to write the Sovereign; in practice, it is safer to affix the international airmail stamp available from your local Canada Post outlet.   AN INTERESTING OPINION PIECE FROM TODAY’S DAILY TELEGRAPHWe thought you might be interested to see the following strongly-worded opinion piece, reflecting a good deal of the tone of recent British public opinion, rather different from much of the Canadian and US commentary. Meghan’s fake interview has real-world effects The Sussexes’ claims have undermined the monarchy and done lasting damage to the Commonwealth by Tim Stanley, March 15, 2021 Two headlines appeared on the BBC News website on the same day. At the top: “Harry and Meghan rattle monarchy’s gilded cage”. At the bottom: “The kidnapped woman who defied Boko Haram”. Well, that puts the Sussexes' problems in perspective, doesn’t it? Yet across Africa, one reads, the Duchess’s story has revived memories of colonial racism, tarnishing the UK’s reputation, and has even lent weight to the campaign in some countries to drop the Queen as head of state. The only nation that seems to think a lot of nonsense was spoken is Britain. In the wake of an interview that Joe Biden’s administration called courageous, British popular opinion of Harry and Meghan fell to an all-time low, and the American format had a lot to do with it. Oprah Winfrey is not our idea of an interviewer. She flattered, fawned and displayed utter credulity. Imagine if it had been her, not Emily Maitlis, who interviewed Prince Andrew over the Jeffrey Epstein allegations. “You were in a Pizza Express that day? Oh my God, you MUST be innocent! Tell me, in all honesty, though...did you have the dough balls?” This wasn’t an interview, it was a commercial for a brand called Sussex, a pair of eco-friendly aristo-dolls that, if you pull the string, tell their truth – which isn’t the truth, because no one can entirely know that, but truth as they perceive it. “Life is about storytelling,” explained Meghan, “about the stories we tell ourselves, the stories we’re told, what we buy into.” Meghan is a postmodernist. Just as Jean Baudrillard said the Gulf War never happened, but was choreographed by the US media, so the Royal narrative she was forced to live was fake, her public happiness was fake and, following that logic, this interview might involve an element of performance, too. People have challenged her claims, alleging contradictions and improbabilities, but one of the malign effects of wokeness is that you have got to be very careful about pointing this out. Why? Because wokery insists on treating a subjective view as objective truth, or even as superior, because it’s based upon “lived experience”. To contradict that personal perspective is perceived as cruel, elitist and, in Meghan’s case, potentially racist, so it’s best to wait a few weeks to a year before applying a fact check. In the meantime, affect sympathy. People would rather you lied to their face than tell them what they don’t want to hear. The result is profoundly dishonest, for I have never known an event over which there is such a gulf between the official reception, as endorsed by the media and politics, and the reaction of average citizens, who are wisely keeping it to themselves. Into that vacuum of silence steps not the voice of reason but bullies and showmen – like Piers Morgan, who said some brash stuff about Meghan’s honesty and, after an unseemly row on Good Morning Britain, felt obliged to resign from his job.  “If you’d like to show your support for me,” he wrote afterwards, “please order a copy of my book.” Dear Lord, was this row fake, too? I can no longer be sure, though I despised Good Morning Britain before and still do: it embodies the cynical confusion of emotion and fact, a show made for clicks, where even the weatherman has an opinion. So what is real in 2021? The Commonwealth, which does a lot of good in a divided world. The monarchy, which has been at its best during the pandemic, doing the boring stuff of cutting ribbons and thanking workers that, one suspects, Meghan never grew into (can you imagine her opening a supermarket in Beccles?). It contains flawed people, but that only adds to its realness, and they can adapt faster than you might think. Prince William got the ball rolling by telling reporters, who he is trained to ignore, that his family is not racist. His wife paid her respects to the murder victim Sarah Everard, demonstrating that she is neither cold nor silenced. I’d wager Kate does her duty, day after day, no complaint, not because she is “trapped”, as Harry uncharitably put it, but because she loves her family and believes in public service. Meghan and Harry have indeed prompted the Royal family to change: not in order to endorse their criticisms, however, but to answer them.

GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦🇬🇧🇦🇺🇳🇿

[turtletimewriting]

Logan’s Adventure- To the doctor’s

Summary: What it says on the tin!

Note: Woop woop! I actually found some motivation to write so feeling good about these ones! I will say, there isn’t any tickling in this one so if you’re reading purely for the tickles then sorry! 

This is based on the tickle forest idea by fluffomatic so check them out!

Beginning!--- Patton’s part!

_._._

“Well where do you think we should go?” Virgil asked. Logan took a pause to consider the options.

“Well all options are valid and useful so I guess-”

“Cool because if you don’t really have a strong opinion, then I say we’re going to the doctors,” Virgil stated and marched on the stoned road leading straight into the village. Logan huffed a laugh at him, “Just... I guess now that you’ve mentioned it, I don’t want to end up getting bitten or a rash or whatever.”

“Sounds good to me,” Logan smiled before shyly linking their hands together.  

Now it was of course no surprise to see that the side that looked like a prince straight from a Disney film would create a medieval European village. The houses all stood tall with dramatic black wooden frames but still somehow made them feel at home immediately. Maybe it was because everyone they passed waved and nodded at them and the first house they passed had a mother placing a hot apple pie on the windowsill. There was colourful bunting strung up the old fashioned oil lamps and they could both almost hear the Disney-esque music playing in the background. It was a short walk until they came across the doctors. 

Walking in, the receptionist smiled widely and waved them over. Luckily, the waiting room was pretty much empty with only one girl fidgeting and tapping her foot. “Hello lovelies! How can I help?” The receptionist spun on her office chair to face them. Despite how friendly everyone was, Virgil automatically kept looking around the office leaving Logan to do the talking.

“Hello, I’m afraid we don’t have an appointment nor are we actually ill. This is our first time... travelling through and we wou-”

“Oh!” The lady butted in and started typing furiously on the computer, “That’s no problem. So would you like a drop-in session to go over how to protect yourselves and basic aid for the wildlife here, right?”

“That’s sounds great, thank you.”

“No problem. I just need to ask some questions so the doctor knows what to ask you all about?” 

“Go ahead.”

“Right, so firstly names?” The receptionist asked much to both of their surprise. Usually most of Roman’s creativity meant that any imagined space and people knew them. Typically every villager would rave about a certain red clad prince hero, they would bake for a certain lovely young man in bright blue, Logan made an effort to challenge the professors and every villager knew to leave the poor shy man in black to himself. 

They both answered basic questions about themselves before the receptionist boredly asked one last question that froze them, “Okay last one, are you lees or lers or switches?” 

“Uh... what?” Virgil whipped round to actually face her for once and Logan simply bluescreened. 

“Do you prefer being tickled, the ticklee, or tickling someone, being a tickler? Or, of course, a little bit of both?” The receptionist asked as if she was simply asking them what they’re favourite colours were. 

“Of course Remus would also create not only paperwork but... stupid questions,” Virgil grumbled but he already knew he was going to answer quickly. Yes this was an anxious nightmare but then he wasn’t about to cause a scene to someone innocently doing their job. He’d just have to get Remus later.

“I’d say both... switches?” Logan asked with a nervous look to Virgil. 

“Yeah?” The lady asked clearly wanting a bit more.

“I’d agree with that but I do think it’s important to note that Logan here leans strongly to the lee side,” Virgil quickly butted in.

“What?” Logan demanded.

“Okay great! You’re all good to go. You won’t have to wait long. Probably no more than five minutes. The doctor will call you. You can take a seat while you wait but I will say that the girl also waiting was bitten by lersquitos so maybe keep you’re distance,” She smiled widely and submitted the form before Logan could fight against any of their answers. 

“Thank you,” Virgil smiled before dragging his bumbling stuttering boyfriend by the shoulders and sitting them a couple of seats away from the girl. 

“You. Are. A... nightmare,” Logan finally snarked once his mind finally loaded from the betrayal. 

“Eh, the doctor’s need all the information they can grab. That means they need to know about your ‘stress relief’ mechanisms,” Virgil breathily whispered into his ears while trailing his fingers up his arms, leaving Logan flinching and childishly giggling. They stopped however when the girl groaned at their teasing. 

“Uh, excuse me. I’m sorry if this is really rude, but we heard you got bitten by... a something. Do you mind telling us about that?” Logan asked 

“Oh, uh a lersquito,” The girl answered with a judgemental look. She answered as if they had asked what colour the sky was. 

“Yes. That... What is that?” He asked. The girl took a deep breath and releasing an obnoxiously long sigh.

“Yeah it’s just a bug. It bites you and you get into a ler mood. It’s like...” She awkwardly paused but continued while never once looking at them, “you can’t get the idea out of your head and it’s like your fingers can’t keep still, y’know. They mostly hang out around water, so yeah.”

“That has got to be a Remus creation,” Logan nodded to himself and the girl simply shrugged them off and continued staring at the wall while slowly flexing her fingers. 

“Yeah wait!” Virgil suddenly perked up, “how on earth do we fight against that! A bug that bites you! I didn’t pay attention to any bugs. We may have already been bitten! And, and, the map goes through the forest. How on earth are we meant to-”

“That’s why we’re here. Surely the doctor can help us,” Logan answered and smoothed his bangs out of his eyes, much to his dismay. 

It wasn’t much longer until they got called by the doctor. She was dressed like any other doctor with no indication that she specialised in any tickle related stuff. “Hello, c’mon in!” She waved them inside a room. It looked also completely normal. There was a typical notice board behind her desk filled with different flyers and information. This was the only indication that they were in a world created and based on tickling. Even Logan had to admit that it was distracting to see a massive poster of a a cartoon man getting absolutely destroyed by bugs with glowing pink mushrooms in the background. 

He snapped back to attention when he noticed the silence. The doctor laughed at them both considered Virgil was still entranced by the poster. “Sorry! Uhm, can you repeat that?”

“I just asked if this was your first time through?” She asked with a polite smile. 

“Oh yes! Right. Yes this is our first time travelling and we would like to be prepared for anything that may get us... in trouble.”

“Ah well there’s not much advice I can give,” She responded.

“Of course it wouldn’t be that easy,” Logan mumbled under his breath but the doctor kept talking without pause.

“Just apply basic common knowledge and you’ll be alright. Don’t mess around with any weird plants, leave the white flowers alone, be careful around animals. Remember if you do get into trouble then come see a doctor if you’re worried. Did you have any more specific questions?” She asked Logan who was still flicking back and forth between the blatant poster and her.

“What is the most common reason people visit?”

“Well usually it’s the ants. Not a lot of people remember to look where they’re standing and, to be honest, their colonies are not obvious. They sting you and can almost triple your sensitivity. Not a problem if it’s a kid but if you’re in the middle of work then it can be a nuisance. Also, if you do get stung and it lasts more than four hours without treatment then seek medical help immediately.”

“Is there any way to... cure the sting?”

“It’s a simple lotion. It won’t make it disappear, you’ll still be quite sensitive, but it really helps dampen the effects. The sting is enough so that your clothes tickle you so a lot of people will buy it in bulk,” She answered while handing them both the tiniest travel bottle of the lotion. It wasn’t much but then he guessed it made sense that they wouldn’t hand them loads of it. 

They chatted but otherwise the doctor was reluctant to give them anymore considered her stance was thoroughly ‘just use common sense’. Virgil kept his gaze fixed on the notice board but the longer they talked, the more confused he looked. Even Logan ended up nudging him to try and get him to pay attention. 

As they were leaving, Virgil finally spoke up. “Wait, can I look at something?” He asked but he was already leaning over her desk to pull off one of the notes. Unlike the other leaflets, it was just plain paper with a scrawled hard to read chicken scratch. 

He showed it to Logan with a concentrated frown. It read:

The treasure is kinda smelly and gross but you’ll love it!!!!

“Is that a clue!” Logan gasped, intentionally snatching it from his hand. 

“It just stuck out as weird,” He pretty much said to himself because now Logan’s mind had latched on. Any mind based puzzle and Logan was in his happy place. The wording all screamed that this was a treasure that Remus created or at the least Remus made the clue. Had they missed more clues? Were they supposed to have any idea what this means? This was so vague! It spoke about the treasure but not about what the password to unlock was. Maybe the password is what the treasure is! 

Logan absolutely didn’t pay attention to Virgil saying thanks to the doctor and shoving them out the door. Virgil merely fondly rolled his eyes and pushed them out of the village and up to the path. Back to the adventure! 

The path led straight into a heavy forest with vines and the constant chirping of birds. The bushes seemed like they were always moving with different animals scuttling about and Virgil could already feel himself start to sweat as the heavy trees trapped the heat in the forest. All this time, Virgil had to admit he did feel a little worried about getting unfairly sneak-attacked but also that was nothing compared to now. The thick heavy forest only showed that they were truly in the thick of it now. They weren’t sightseeing around a village. They were in an adventure. 

They had barely stepped through the forest before stopping. Across the path was a weeping willow. It was just as gorgeous as terrifying. The soft pinks and white rustling together in a beautiful dance of a feathery bright petals. But also that was the most obvious trap he had ever seen in his life. Logan was still mumbling to himself staring at the clue so he carefully plapped the clue out of his hands and silently pointed at the tree. 

“Ah,” Logan said.

“Yeah. Ah. What do we do?” Virgil sighed. Logan looked around with a wince. The path carved through extremely thick trees and bushes and dense foliage. 

“There’s no good option here. We could keep to the path and just take whatever this tree does or we could go around it.”

“But god knows what’s in there!” Virgil gasped!

“So do we go forward knowing we will get tickled by these... feathery looking branches or get tickled by the unknown. There isn’t a good option here,” Logan sighed. 

This adventure took 20 minutes!

Total time: 46 minutes.

OOH BOY THAT WAS SOO LONG, I’M SO SORRY!

The adventure continues, but what shall our boys do?!

1) Go forward

2) Go off the path 

Now, Logan and Virgil know about lersquitos, tickle ants and discovered a clue! But now Logan is distracted with figuring out the clue!

[bbyx]

in your dreams - part one

Summary: Remus Lupin is head over heels for Narcissa, but she’s not allowed to date until her sister (y/n) has a boyfriend. As a solution, Remus enlists Sirius to become (y/n)’s boyfriend.                                                                        Pairings: reader x sirius, remus x narcissa, lucius x narcissa, james x lily Disclaimer: This is basically harry potter universe x 10 things i hate about you. You DON’T need to have seen the movie to understand bc this is basically a retelling of the story. Also some of the dialogue has been taken straight from the movie. ALSO in this story Narcissa and Bellatrix are NOT Sirius’s cousins.

Hogwarts. It was beautiful, breathtaking even from the train window. The great castle looms into view, and (y/n) Knightley gets slightly tearful at the fact that this is the beginning of her last year at Hogwarts. A year from now you would hopefully begin your training as a healer at St.Mungos. That is if your father didn’t marry you off before that. 

Your thoughts are abruptly interrupted by the compartment door sliding open. A group of giggling girls pop their heads in, blasting a horrendously high pitched song from a portable cassette player.

“Hi we’re the Promenade ball committee! Make sure to buy a ticket. It’ll be a night to remember!” One of them says in a sugar sweet voice, handing you a purple flyer. You simply roll your eyes as an answer and the girls leave, mumbling to themselves. You manage to hear a what a bitch through the high pitched singing. You glance down at the paper. It reads:

Promenade ball! Hogwarts class of 1978

May 22nd - 8:00 to 12:00

Tickets : 10 galleons each

You scrunch the paper into a ball and throw it out the open window. 

Balls were stupid anyways.

Remus walked into Professor Myriads office, the head of Gryffindor house. He’s missed Hogwarts. Spending one year abroad at Ilvermorny was a great experience but it couldn't compete with the beauty of Hogwarts. In one year, so much had changed yet it still felt the same way it had in his first year. Strange but familiar.

“Remus Lupin. Welcome back! I hope you enjoyed your stay in America. Now I know you remember this school like the back of your hand but it is a Hogwarts rule that any returning students must be shown around the premises again. I’ve assigned Peter Pettigrew to be your guide for today.” She says motioning to Peter standing outside, waving excitedly. “You may go to class now.” The silver haired woman said, dismissing him quickly. Remus reached down for his bookbag when a shadow stood leaning in the doorway. 

“Padfoot!”

“Moony! Missed you mate.” Sirius and Remus embraced each other tightly, Professor Myriad cleared her throat. 

“Sirius Black. I see we're making our visits a weekly ritual. You better not get in trouble this year if you want to graduate.” She gave him a disapproving glance. He answered with a charming smile.

“Only so we can have these moments together. Should I, uh, get the lights?”

“Oh very clever Mr. Black. That’ll be ten points from Gryffindor.”

“Remus! Oh we’ve missed you so much. Tell me how it was. How were the states? Good god, so many things have changed in the past year.” Peter said, spitting out more questions than Remus could handle.

“It was nice, Ilvermorny was very laid back. They study native magic and lots of non verbal spells. I’ll tell you more at dinner.”

“Allright, let me give you the breakdown, even though you know most of this stuff.” Peter said.

They begin to walk around the grounds.

“Over there you’ve still got your basic beautiful people.” He motions to a group of students sitting under a tree. “To the left we have the coffee kids. A new developpement since Dippet allowed a coffee machine in the Great Hall.”

“Interesting.” Remus said, looking at the students who couldn’t seem to sit still.

One of them knocked over his cup, filled with rich brown liquid, onto the other’s lap. “Whoa”

“That was a Costa Rican, asshole!”

“Very edgy.  Don’t make any sudden moves around them.” Peter added. 

They now approached a few students dressed in large hats and leather boots.

 “These guys…” Peter started.

“Wait wait.  Let me guess.  Cowboys?”

“Yeah, ever since that muggle movie Grayeagle came out.”

“Who would have thought that I would see more cowboys back at Hogwarts than the US.”

They now neared a group of students sitting on the grass, scribbling on parchment furiously.                

“These are your future Ministers. Hey guys.  How ya doin’?” Peter waved to the group. They rolled their eyes at him and went back to they’re books.

“Yesterday I was their god.” Peter said wistfully.

Remus chuckled, he had missed this atmosphere. “What happened.”

“Bogie Levenstein started a rumor that I...that I used an enchanted quill on my OWL’s.”

“Did you?” Remus asked, already knowing the answer.

“Not the point.” Muttered Peter.

“So they kicked you out?” Remus continued.

“Hostile takeover.  But don’t worry.  They’ll pay.  Now over here…”

“Merlin’s sake.” Remus whispered as a beautiful, creamy skinned dark haired girl walked by.

 “What group is she in?”

“The “don’t even think about it” group. That’s Narcissa Knightley.  Fifth year.” Peter said, shaking his head at his friend. Remus' mouth was still agape as she walked past him with her friend.

“Yup, see, there’s a difference between “like” and “love”.  Because I like my wand, but I love my Snakeskin backpack.” Narcissa explained to the other girl.

“But I love my wand.” Her friend says clutching her wand to her chest.

“That’s because you don’t have a snakeskin backpack.” Narcissa said, like it was the most obvious thing. Her friend looks enamoured by her wisdom.

“Oohhh.”

“Listen. Forget her.  Incredibly uptight father, and it’s a widely known fact that the Knightley sisters aren’t allowed to date.” Peter said, shaking his Remus's shoulder.

“Uh huh...yeah.”

At dinner later that night, Remus couldn’t keep his gaze off the enchanting girl at the Slytherin table.

“Earth to Moony!” James said between mouthfuls.

“Mate, we haven’t seen you in months. Talk. Or would you rather go join the Slytherins.” Sirius says, glaring at the green robed students.

“He has a thing for Narcissa Knightley.” Remus gave Peter a death glare.

“She’s pretty, but not as pretty as Lily Evans.” James sighed, looking at the auburn haired girl.

“Prongs, you're still running after her? It’s been, what, three years of her constantly rejecting you.” Remus chuckled.

“At least Lily’s allowed to date.” James retorted.

“You guys are pathetic.” Sirius said, grinning cockily, knowing he could get any girl at Hogwarts easily.

“Okay then.  What did everyone think of the Tales of the Wizard-Goblin war?” Professor Binns, Hogwarts only ghost professor, asked.

“I loved it. The part with Ginnamora was soooo romantic.” A clueless girl sighed.

“Romantic?  Buckthorn?!  He was an abusive alcoholic misogynist who squandered half his life hanging around Giraf Abbott trying to nail his leftovers.” (y/n) said to the girl, earning eyerolls from the other students. 

Lucius Malfoy chuckles cockily. “As opposed to a bitter self-righteous hag who has no friends?”

Giggles erupt through the room. (y/n) doesn’t turn around to face him, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of knowing he’d pissed her off.

“I guess in this society being male and an asshole makes you worthy of our time.”

Just then, a dark haired boy strolls confidently inside the classroom.

“What’d I miss?” Sirius asked.

“The oppressive patriarchal values that dictate our education.” You answered, gritting your teeth furiously.

“Good.” He turned around and went back out of the room.

“Hey, hey!” The ghost professor looked like he was about to go after him but decided to stay put.

“Uh,Professor.  Is there any chance we could get (y/n) to take her calming drought before she comes to class?” Lucius said, high fiving his fellow slytherins.

“Mr.Malfoy, someday you’re gonna get hexed and I’m not gonna do a thing to stop it.  And Miss. Knightley.  I want to thank you for your point of view.” Professor Binns stated. (y/n) smiled to herself.

Take that Malfoy.

“I know how difficult it must be for you to overcome all those years of pureblood oppression.  It must be tough.” Professor Binns' words wiped the grin right off her face. (y/n) thanks Merlin that Lucius Malfoy, with his inflated ego, couldn’t see her face. Professor Binns continues.

“But the next time you storm around the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures crusading for better house elves, or whatever it is you wealthy purebloods complain about, ask them why they can’t buy a book written by a ghost!”

 His normally monotone voice was now strident. Never in your six years at Hogwarts had you ever heard Professor Binns get so riled up. The whole class was taken about by his sudden burst of emotion. You quickly recover from your slight shock.

“Anything else?”

“Ten points from Gryffindor.  Go to your head of house.” Professor Binns stated, sounding a little brittle.

“What?!  Professor Binns!” You plead but he’s already started scribbling on the chalkboard. (y/n) storms out, making sure to hit Lucius Malfoy with her bag on the way.

Professor Myriad was scribbling a letter when you reached her office, knocking on the doorway to make your presence known. The silver haired woman lowered her glasses as you sat down in a crimson chair.

“So I hear you were terrorizing Professor Binns‘s class.  Again.”

“With all due respect expressing my opinion is not a terrorist action.” You say, picking at your nails.

“The way you expressed your opinion to Richard Crabbe? By the way, his testicle retrieval operation went quite well, in case you're interested.” She remarqued, mentioning a particularly nasty quidditch fight between (y/n) and that idiot Crabbe.

“I still maintain that his broom malfunctioned and he kicked himself in the balls.” You answer cooly, trying your hardest not to let any emotion seep through your face.

Professor Myriad fumbled. “The point is (y/n)...People perceive you as somewhat …” 

“Tempestuous?”

“"Heinous bitch" is the term used most often.” She states simply.

How flattering, Professor.

“You might want to work on that. Try being more like your sister.” 

You raised your eyebrows at her comment because the woman clearly had no idea what she was getting into.

“Tell me Professor, which sister are we talking about? Bellatrix? Who was married off to some greasy pureblood the day after she graduated. Andromeda? Who followed her heart but was shunned from the family. Or Narcissa? Who at sixteen still, for the love of god, cannot tie her shoelaces.” 

(y/n) rises from her chair and says, in her most sarcastic tone  “As always, thank you for your excellent guidance.” before strolling out of the tiny office.

Lucius and his friends were sprawled in their usual spots under a tree. Someone in the group mumbles “Virgin alert” as Narcissa and Josie walk past. Lucius’s attention is immediately fixed on the innocent looking brunette. The girls notice him and wave shyly.

“Looking good ladies.”

“They’re outta reach, even for you.” Simon Nott  said in a sing-song voice.

“No one’s out of reach for me.” Lucius says, sizing his friend up.

“You wanna put money on that?” Simon questions, leaning back against the tree. Lucius glances at Narcissa who’s laughing with a group of fifth year students,

“Money I’ve got.  This I’m going to do for fun.”

From across the courtyard, Remus, James and Peter observe the way Lucius Malfoy is eyeing Narcissa, like a tiger watching his prey. Remus feels strangely protective of her, wanting to protect her from Lucius’s slimy paws. He gazed at her as she giggled, her dimples showing.

“Mate, look at her.” He said in a voice soft with affection.

James is clearly unimpressed. “Is she always so...vapid?”

“How can you say that?  She’s totally…”

“Conceited?”Peter leered.

“What are you talking about Wormtail?  There’s more to her than you think. I mean, look... look at the way she smiles. And look at her eyes, man.  She’s totally pure.  I mean, you’re missing what’s there.”

“No, Moony.  No. What’s there is a snotty little Princess creating a strategically planned appearance to make guys like us realize we can never touch her, and guys like, uh…” Peter fumbled, looking across the courtyard. “...Lucis, realize they want to. She, my friend, is what we’ll spend the rest of our lives not having. Move on.”

“No.” Remus pouted stubbornly.

“Move on.” James quipped, repeating Peter’s words.

“No! You’re wrong about her.  You’re so wrong.” Remus grumbled back.

“Alright.  I’m wrong?  You wanna take a shot?  Be my guest. She’s actually looking for a Mermish tutor.”

Remus’s eyes light up. “Are you serious?  That’s perfect!”

“Do you even speak Mermish?” James questioned. Remus flashed his bright teeth.

“Well no.  But I will.”

[chibalein]

Kalafina Live Report: 9+ONE @Kitakyushu - REVISITED

So, this is something I wanted to do for a long time now (almost 3 years to be exact). Back in 2017, when Kalafina was still a thing and times were good, I was lucky enough to live in Japan and able to attend various of Kalafina activities. My first proper concert was their final live of the 9+ONE tour in the city of Kitakyushu/Fukuoka prefecture, in June 2017.

My first live report was certainly different than all the others that followed, less detailed, less emotional so to say. I always wanted to update the whole thing because looking back, there were so many moments during the concert that I - for whatever reason - did not write about enough or not at all. Well, since I have been working at home for quite a while now, I feel like now is the perfect time, as this gives me an amazing reason to be lazy and productive at the same time. Here is my original live report: PART 1  /  PART 2

So, a lot of things will certainly stay the same because I just don’t remember enough of the concert, especially about the vocal performance or things the girls have said during the MCs. I will add some other details that I still remember (hopefully correctly), and describe everything a bit nicer too :)

Let’s do it! Long ass report ahead! again

Back then, I was living in Kanagawa prefecture, but I was too late for tickets of the Yokohama or Tokyo lives. I was planning to visit a friend who lived in Fukuoka city at the time and Kalafina’s Kitakyushu concert perfectly fit into my schedule. Luckily, I was able to buy a ticket via convenience store. As I was pretty late, I got a kinda bad seat in the almost very back of the upper floor.

The morning of the live I arrived in the city of Kitakyushu, which is a rather famous port city at the northern tip of Fukuoka prefecture. The historic town Kokura has a beautiful castle, which I visited as well as Moji port. (After reading Hikaru’s blog post where she said that she also went to see the castle, I was a bit disappointed that I didn’t meet her xD). There’s also TOTO Museum, a museum dedicated to the TOTO company, which is famous for inventing those high-tech toilets that Japan is so known for.

I was kind of warned beforehand that the Kalafina good’s sale would attract a ton of people, so I wanted to be there as early as possible. About two hours too early I arrived at Kitakyushu’s Harmony Cinq Soleil Hall and waited along with a handful of other people. Slowly but steadily more and more people would gather, forming an absurdly long line. Not as extreme as the 10th Anniversary good’s line, but still impressive. Luckily, I was standing in some shade, because it was so damn hot and sunny the entire weekend. When the doors finally opened, I am sure there were like 200-300 people waiting to receive those sweet sweet popcorn buckets that were sold as venue exclusive merchandise. In the end, I bought the T-shirt, the key holder, the popcorn and the clear files, but looking back I do regret not buying the notebook. I wanted the popcorn mainly because of the Kitakyushu exclusive sticker - the popcorn itself had the flavor chocolate + soda (I think?), which I remember thinking was the shittiest combo of all flavors they had. It didn’t taste as bad as I thought but I still think it was overpriced. Together with the ticket itself, I ended up spending about 100€, which I thought was a lot, especially as there were people buying the entire collection and even more... hahahaha, oh innocent, naive past me, I didn’t know what was coming to me yet.

(Photo: in front of the venue)

I do love my merch though. I still wear all my Kalafina T-shirts at home, and while in Japan I had the key holder... hold my keys, making it all dirty and bent now lol The popcorn cup is decorating my shelf to this day.

Anyway, after getting my stuff, I went on to walk around, grab something to eat and even made friends with a Japanese girl, sharing our Kalafina love. Later, when people were admitted, probably around 800-900 people were there, quite a view! I saw some foreigners as well, and even made friends with a Philippine girl as well :D

(Photo: merch table at the venue)

(Photo: the stuff I bought)

While entering, staff was handing out little goodie bags, mostly with flyers and ads for other events or the obligatory concert questionnaire. However, that bag included our very own 9+ONE Lights! I took my seat which wasn’t as far from the stage as I thought, but I still would not be able to see the girls’ expressions.

When the concert finally started, a black but transparent screen was lowered (you know it from the 9+ONE DVD) and they started to play an overture version of “Samidare ga sugita koro ni”. Meanwhile we got see a collection of Kalafina’s entire discography, where each title of their songs, even in their respective font if available, was shown and merged into a white cloud, revealing our ladies.

(Photo: stage before the concert started)

They started with “Samidare ga sugita koro ni”. I remember it being good and nice, but I was never really fond of that song, even though it has grown on me a bit. We all clapped along and had our fun.

It continued with “misterioso”, also a song that has grown on me over time. While everyone was staying seated and enjoying themselves before, all the dudes in the arena seats jumped to their feet, being an upbeat song and stuff. I was grateful for the upper floor to have stayed seated almost the entire time, because being so far away was shitty enough and I didn’t want to spend 2 hours standing.

Anyhow, this song revealed some flaws in either the acoustics of the hall or the mixing of the sound technicians (I guess the latter?). Wakana was uncomfortably loud most of the time, drowning out the other two, but especially Hikaru - in some songs more than in others and more often than not when she wasn’t in the lead too. Some of her notes simply made me cringe. Hikaru on the other hand seemed to be feeling the exhaustion of the tour. On many occasions, she sounded tired, especially when it came to hit those high or long notes. The band didn’t help either, they also drowned out many parts of the singing... Maybe it was just this venue though and luckily, the 10th Anniversary wasn’t like this. Then again, I only attended acoustic lives or lives without band after that, so who knows how they sound when there is no DVD recording going on XD

Next was “Lacrimosa”, and this time Wakana wasn’t being as cringy as before. Poor Hikaru doing nothing for most of the time. One cool moment was that short pause after their “LA-CRI-MO-SA” part, right before the final chorus. The stage turned deep red with the girls reaching out to the audience. When you don’t know that this is coming, it’s an incredibly powerful move.

I don’t remember what they said during MC#1, other than greeting the audience and the usual “We hope you have fun” stuff. I do remember Hikaru welcoming us to the Harmony Cinq Kitakyushu Soleil Hall, by saying the entire name of the hall, and then saying something along the lines of “Thank god I didn’t trip over my tongue” (it’s a lot harder to say that name in Japanese, I give it to her lol).

They proceeded to introduce “Ashita no Keshiki”, a song that is not performed often, also because it’s a song that is mainly sung by Wakana. It was a beautiful performance, which was a little bit ruined by Hikaru. If you thought that she sounds strained and tired in the 9+ONE DVD version, well, imagine her like 5 concerts after that performance. Still great though, I came to love that song a lot.

“Hikaru no senritsu” was equally ok, but Hikaru again kind of screwed up her short “ashita wo kanadete” towards the end of the song. She probably just didn’t hit the note correctly, but to me it sounded as if she screwed up the timing, because I didn’t even her the first word or so.

With “Mirai”, Kalafina finally started to move around, so far they had stayed glued to their positions. They waved and interacted with the audience, cheering us on to cheer them on. I did enjoy the performance and the overall atmosphere, although “Mirai” belongs to my most disliked of all Kalafina songs.

In MC#2, they talked about “Ashita no Keshiki” a bit, together with their first album and how this is the first time performing in Kitakyushu (and not Fukuoka city). Since this is Wakana’s home prefecture, she proceeded to talk about her favorite Udon and Ramen restaurants (I think it was also about the restaurant chain West) and other specialties of Fukuoka.

The next song was “Oblivious”, also a song I was really looking forward to. As you know, this time Hikaru decided to sing her first lines in her high head voice (probably because she just can’t do it “regularly” anymore). I thought and still think it’s lovely, as it gives the song a much more mysterious opening and it’s also quite closer to the original to be honest. Wakana and the band drowned out Keiko for most of the time, with Hikaru and her high voice coming to the party later too. The acoustics were really weird that day...

“storia” was as usual, nothing special and not a song that really stands out to me anymore.

I was more looking forward to “Gogatsu no Mahou”, which is also a song I came to appreciate more over time. I adore the bridge section after the chorus, especially Wakana’s “habataku kotori no” and that one super high moment, so I really tried to focus on that particular part of the song. It was great!

With “consolation”, finally a darker and fiercer song made its debut and while I don’t really remember the performance itself anymore, I do remember the stage production. Basically, they packed out those lights and illuminations that they have been hiding so far and blasted us with them. Hikaru was pretty quiet though. Keiko on the hand appeared to have problems with her earpiece, and at some point she was frantically waving to the technicians backstage.

Wakana took it upon herself to dominate “To the beginning” as well, but we got some action on stage at least, since the girls stayed glued to their positions most of the timea again.

In MC#3, Keiko talked about how every live performance as well as their unique harmony is important to them (quite ironic after Wakana was actively trying to make Keiko NOT be heard lol). The following song was special in a sense that there would be NO harmony. Back then, when Kalafina received the song for the first time (or before recording, not sure), they even asked Kajiura Yuki whether this is correct or even intentional.

With “Haru wo matsu” we got our obligatory ballad. While I was never really fond of the song, I think it’s sweet and yes, their missing harmony gives it quite a refreshing vibe. Keiko sounded pretty much like in the 9+ONE DVD, but it was so strange to hear her cutesy voice live and so clearly... she sounded like an entirely different person XD Hikaru, for the first time actually, could finally shine, as we could HEAR her. She didn’t deliver as good as she probably could have, but still it was a very pretty performance.

Now, we were reaching the spot on their setlist that would differ at each venue. Before the concert, I checked out all setlists from the previous lives to see whether there were any patterns or which songs were most likely to be performed (again). It seemed like they took 4-5 songs and repeated them over the course of the tour, which is why I had my hopes high for “Hikaru furu” or “Kimi no gin no niwa”. But interestingly they chose a song they hadn’t performed yet (please correct if I’m wrong here), which was “Ring your bell”.

“Ring your bell” is very high on my list of all-time disliked Kalafina songs (I just can’t seem to escape that song...). But I was pleasantly surprised to hear that they started the song as an acoustic version, very much like the performance during their Arena Live. It stayed acoustic until after the first chorus, then the band joined too. I like this half-half version over the “normal” version, because it’s an amazing moment when you don’t expect the loud and cheerful opening of “Ring your bell” to suddenly fill the stage. The overall harmony of band and singers came together again and the acoustics were finally so much cleaner and nicer. The audience rose to their feet and even some dedicated dudes on my loser floor stood up to cheer them on. However, Wakana’s final high-pitched “ring your BELL” was incredibly cringy and breathy, one of the main reasons I hate the song so much.

Anyway, Kalafina got their break to change costumes and we got an AMAZING performance by the band that played some BGM of the anime “Kubikiri Cycle”. To this day, I don’t know what exact song they played and for the love of god, please SOMEONE TELL ME. I know it was fairly uptempo and rather dark... help pls XD

So far, the stage production was pretty much boring and simple. Other than some light effects, nothing really happened, we just had that huge curtain as background. Now, we finally got ACTION. Well, at least for the eye. They lifted the curtain and revealed those huge, impressing statues of Kalafina’s silhouettes, mostly made out of their past live outfits. I could have spent a long time checking out every part of this artwork, trying to recognize what dresses from which live they used and what not. Now that I watched the DVD, I know where Kalafina was standing, but at the time I didn’t see them AT ALL. The music played the overture and suddenly Keiko was on stage with the other two following her. To me it looked like they stepped THROUGH the middle silhouette, but turns out they were just standing in front of it - they were so far away, I couldn’t differ between them and the clothes behind them lol

(Photo: Hikaru’s “silhouette” with her outfits)

Well, I think I already gave you my opinion on those new dresses... At the time, both Keiko and Wakana looked kinda cool and pretty shiny, but even though I could see jack shit from so far away, I knew that Hikaru’s outfit was a disappointment. Her fucking pants and skirt or whatever that is... XD

I was incredibly looking forward to “Märchen”, as now it became one of my all-time favorite songs. But back then I was especially amazed by the song during their release event of the single in April. I wanted to hear this live again so badly and well... I did, but it wasn’t as good as the release event. Again, Hikaru sounded tired and Keiko and Wakana were fighting about who could be louder than the band. Keiko drowned out Hikaru most of the time... During the middle section we saw their Kala-dance, which I already got to witness during the release event. However, I was pleased to see that they decided to spice things up by showing background animations. It looked like they danced in sinc with themselves, it was truly impressive and such a refreshing use of video. This, as well as the later “Magia” performance made this concert/tour truly stand out and I am glad that they could take their creativity to a new level. I wish they would have continued to do so much more later on.

So, let’s talk about “Magia”. Holy shit, what a performance. The screen from the very beginning was lowered, intro was played, forest was shown, you know it guys. In sync with their live singing, they showed this fucking amazing pre-recorded bits of Kalafina and as I didn’t see this coming, it absolutely blew my mind. It was a psychedelic wtf show with cinema feeling all over the place and for once, the acoustics were actually good. Especially the instrumental part was... I don’t know what it was, but HOLY. SHIT. Truly guys, it was so cool. If there ever was an interview on that particurly performance I would love to read it to how Kalafina thought about this one and how the creation process went. When Keiko stepped in front of the screen it just added to her overall cool demeanor. When the screen was lifted again, we got a little sneak peak of the microphone stands in back.

(Photo: Keiko’s “silhouette” with her costumes)

Which were of course used for “Kyrie”. The DVD version is truly one of my favorite performances of that song and in Kitakyushu it was pretty cool too, especially with their small but effective arm movements. Keiko’s final long-ass “kyrie” was amazing and fairly unexpected from my side. Also some fat light show and big bass sounds, which I am always appreciating.

Next up was “heavenly blue” and here they tried to interact with the crowd once more. I like this song mostly for the kajiurago bridge and I always focus especially on Wakana’s super high “so na” (or whatever), while Keiko is going low at the same time. Wakana was too loud again though, but by now their overall performance and acoustics improved quite a lot.

“One Light” once again activated the crowd, especially Hikaru went crazy here. The atmosphere was amazing and you could just feel that everyone was fired up, singing along and having fun. Everyone just screamed when Hikaru sang “boku wa yukeru”, so cool.

MC#4 was about band introduction. Konno Hitoshi and Sakurada weren’t present if I remember correctly, which was a shame... but then again, I wouldn’t know the difference lol

The last song of the block was their new single at the time, “Into the world”. It was really beautiful, Hikaru finally sang more clearly. A good performance, very similar to the ones I would see from that point on.

We got a little break again, as Kalafina traditionally fake-ended the concert. While the audience was clapping, it took about 5 minutes or so for them to return. But first, the screen was lowered again, and some text, together with the intro for “Ongaku” finally told us to switch on our 9+ONE Lights. Everyone did so and boy, what a sight! Even from so far in the back, the lights in the dark hall looked so great! While of course hundreds and hundreds of people were present, you don’t really get a sense of that sheer number when you focus on the stage the entire time. I looked around and with so many lights illuminating the hall, you truly get a feeling of how many people actually are here with you.

Kalafina returned with their plain, but nevertheless cool black outfits, wearing the little lights themselves and standing on a mini-stage. The song played out as usual, but this time, as Konno Hitoshi wasn’t present and the other violin guy played his solo different than usual. Don’t ask me how it differed, I really don’t remember, but I liked that version a lot more. We got a new cool background too.

“blaze” pretty much business as usual.

(Photo: Wakana’s “silhouette” with her outfits, sorry for the bad quality)

MC#5 was about Hikaru and her beloved sales corner, where she mainly introduced the Kalafina produced goods like Keiko’s pink dumbbell and her bath salt (I think). She talked about the 9+ONE Lights and that they do not produce new lights for each concert, but re-use them every time. That was supposed to increase to sense of unity and connection between them and the fans as well as among the fans themselves, “carrying the fire of every fan and concert to the next” or something like this. As Kalafina had upcoming concerts in Taiwan and Hong Kong, Hikaru said that they would bring the lights to international fans too, so “don’t take them home!”. Well... I guess my ten years of studying Japanese at this point must have failed me in that particular instance because I truly don’t know what she said or meant. I unfortunately ended up taking the ring home. #guiltybutnotguilty #sue me

I think this is also where they talked about the big silhouettes we have seen in the earlier block and that they used dresses from previous performances to decorate them. They then turned around, facing the wall and imitated the poses of the silhouettes - it was super funny and crowd laughed and cheered. I think they lifted the screen of this stained glass pattern to show the silhouettes for direct comparison. (Correct me if I am wrong, but I think they cut out this conversation from the DVD? Not sure, too lazy to check).

We sadly arrived the final song of the setlist, which again should differ at each venue. What song would it be? I hoped for songs like “sprinter” or “Yume no daichi”, as those were among the songs they had already performed during the tour.

Well, back then, they had announced their new single “Hyakka Ryouran”, but it wasn’t released yet (I think we only knew some bits of the chorus at the time). Funnily, I talked about that with the girls I had met prior to admittance, something like “Hey, wouldn’t it be cool if Kalafina performed Hyakka Ryouran as surprise encore?”. I mean, they were no strangers to performing songs that haven’t been officially released yet, see “Into the World” during the Arena Live. But, you know... I thought that would be unlikely, because why should they?

BUT NOT THEY ACTUALLY DID IT! Keiko was like: “Ah, which song will be the final song... Well, how about our new single?”, and the crowd LOST IT. I lost it too XD Seriously, no one could handle that. Anyway, now that I know the full version by heart, it’s hard to describe how I felt back then. Listening to a song for the first time is always an experience, but it makes it hard to remember when you can’t listen to it again and again. I tried to focus on every aspect of the song, and remember it as being “dark”, due to Keiko’s deep intro, “fast” and “rock-like”, fitting into the samurai setting of the anime with its flute elements. I still couldn’t believe my luck though and afterwards, the crowd cheered and cheered.

Now the concert should have been over, but instead they entered MC#6. They talked about the first sing of the night “Samidare ga sugita koro ni”. Apparently, they pretty much have never performed this one live, except once during a fanclub-only event. For this tour they wanted to sing this song “for everyone”, as it is such a bright and warm piece.

So, for whatever reason, Kalafina decided to perform “Samidare ga sugita koro ni” AGAIN. However, this time they emphazised that bright feeling of connected hearts and unity by making us turn on our One Lights and wave along with the rhythm. Everyone loudly sang with them, especially during the “lalala” part towards the end. It was so much fun to listen to Kalafina, to the audience around me and singing along too, all while watching this amazing light show that we were creating ourselves. It was even better and much more carefree than the first performance. Still can’t believe my luck that of all venues of the 9+ONE tour, I got to attend to most unique one.

After that, the band was introduced again, they all held hands and thanked the audience for coming. But just before they wanted to bow, Wakana suddenly sobbed (so loud that I actually heard it lol), trying to wipe away tears. Being in her home prefecture, I figured she was just so overwhelmed by her emotions. Each of the three said some final words and with that the concert and the domestic 9+ONE tour ended.

I proceeded to take photos of the stage, as we were still able to see the big silhouettes. However, staff members appeared and told everyone to stop taking pictures and get the fuck out, probably to stop people from “spoiling” the concert before the DVD release or copyright or whatever. Well, thankfully I already took like 3 photos and managed to sneakily take another one, in order to have a close shot of each silhouette (which is why the third photo of Wakana’s statue is not a close-up like the other too). I left the building, returned to Fukuoka city and 2 days later back to Kanagawa.

-------------------------------------------------

Despite the sound issues, it was truly a great live experience. 9+ONE would be, along with the 10th Anni, my only “real” Kalafina concert experience, as all the other concerts I attended would either be acoustic or without live band. I am so thankful that I managed to seize the opportunity and attend this live, especially in Wakana’s home. Writing this report again made me remember all those feelings I had back then, now they make me both happy and sad.

Anyway, I hoped you like my updated report!

[daisiesforlacey]

clouds - chapter 2 : cirrus

Pair: Julie x alive!Luke

Summary: After her mother’s death, Julie Molina moved away from Hollywood, across the country, to Ithaca, New York. She’s left behind her two loves in life: her best friend, Luke, and her music. There, she finds new friends and enemies, new experiences and joys, she might even find herself. Every night, Luke calls Julie to talk about the clouds. But what if Luke is hiding something? 

Word Count: 3,344

Warnings: angsty??? I mean we gotta move the story along soooo

Note: I started writing this and it got away from me! I think this series might be longer than originally intended, but that’s not a bad thing. I can’t wait to delve more into Alex, Reggie, and Carrie’s storylines, but for now, here’s this! Please please comment, like, reblog; feedback is always appreciated :)))

Masterlist

Taglist

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The morning had been much chillier than the previous day. On their way to school, Julie and Flynn had bundled up in their favorite sweaters and scarves, along with matching thermoses of tea. Julie had tried to stuff her hair into a wool hat, but after failing miserably, she settled on tying her hair back into a ponytail. Flynn had offered to help style her curls that morning, but she had declined.

The ground next to the sidewalk was blue with frost and they could almost see their breath if they squinted hard enough. 

In Ithaca, the winter was dryer, she had found that her lips chapped more often and she seemed to constantly have the sniffles. In L.A, when it got colder, it mostly rained, snow was far and few between and was never terribly enjoyable; the second it hit the ground it would become this sort of grey sludge. One thing they both shared was the unpredictability. Seeing the sun one day did not often guarantee a warm week, which left Julie to keep an array of coats of different thicknesses. 

There weren’t too many clouds to see, if she tried hard enough, she might be able to make out a flying saucer. She shook her head, spaceships were too easy and basic; anything could be a UFO. 

As they walked and the sun slowly rose, they talked about their upcoming day; if Carrie was going to be tolerable, if they would be getting new music projects, and who was buying lunch.

Luckily for Julie, she could already feel the air warm up, unfortunately, the conversion had shifted to Luke.

“How is your friend? Liam, or whatever?” Flynn asked, tossing her hair over her shoulder.

“Luke,” Julie snorted and looked down at her hands, “He’s doing well, he didn’t see too many shapes yesterday, so our conversation was relatively short.” Flynn knew about their nightly calls, but Julie had left out most of the reason they happened. Flynn didn’t need to know how much she missed her friend, she didn’t want the other girl to feel inadequate. 

“It’s really cool that you guys still keep in touch, if all of my friendships drifted apart that nicely, Carrie…” Flynn drifted off into thought at the mention of Carrie. Contemplating Julie, frowned, she didn’t particularly like to think that she and Luke had drifted, but she supposed they had literally done just that. 

“Well when you have a history like Luke and I have, it’s impossible not to talk to him.” Julie didn’t mention that he seemed to be a part of her that was now missing, or that Luke had this sort of magnetism that drew anyone and everyone to him, or that when they wrote songs together she had felt more alive and seen than anything. 

Those things didn’t need saying, those things had been left in L.A. 

But in here she had Flynn and a small town and a family. 

A broken family, she thought. 

---

As Nick finished his guitar solo, his lacrosse buddies whooped and hollered in the small music room. 

It was smaller than the one back home, but just as welcoming. Cinder block walls had been covered with sound absorbers and music posters ranging from “hang in there” cats to major and minor scales to student made flyers, advertising the school dance coming up. 

Their mascot, a yellow and black cougar, had been painted on the wall by an art club some time ago. It was slightly lopsided and its snarling mouth looked more mangled, but the sentiment was there. 

Julie had zoned out long before Nick had started, staring at the chipped paint on the wall. She knew the second she walked up to the piano to play, she would freeze. No amount of mental preparation could prepare her to set her fingers on the ivory keys and play something, anything. 

“Okay, we have one last performance,” Her teacher said, “Julie.” 

The girl looked up slowly. She stumbled toward the piano with hesitant steps. She sat down with a sigh and opened the sheet music. Her blood was rushing and her head was pounding. The room seemed to blur and spin, but was also eerily still and quiet. 

She could feel the eyes of her classmates boring into her skull. As they watched her, she could guess what they were thinking, here we go again, I wonder if she’ll actually play this time, just get on with it. 

Julie knew that Flynn was trying to encourage her, even from where she was sitting, but she  couldn’t bring herself to look at the girl.

“Take your time,” Her teacher assured. 

Julie might take forever. 

She opened the case of the piano and grazed her fingertips on the keys. They were cold and unforbidding. The second she pressed one of the keys she knew that she would break.

Memories of her mother would come rushing back; every scraped knee, every hand holding in the parking lot, every crush whispered in secret, every night spent over the stove learning what spice goes in when, every uncontrollable fit of laughter. 

She would remember every Christmas and Easter that they would break out her Abuela’s Arroz Con Leche recipe, every concert they went to where they would scream lyrics until their throats were raw. 

Every failed test that her mother had stayed up late to help her study for, every flu shot where her mother still held her hand, no matter how old she got.

Every note written or melody sung would fill her mind. She didn’t know what would happen when it did, and she desperately didn’t want to find out. 

She stood up, “I’m sorry.”

Julie thought she heard Carrie say some snarky remark and that Flynn had retaliated, but she couldn’t have been sure before she was rushing out the door. 

After the school day, Flynn and her walked home as quickly as they could, sometimes sprinting. They needed to beat Julie’s father home after he picked up her brother, Carlos, up from his own school. She was praying that he hadn’t heard the news that she was out of the music program yet. 

She groaned as she saw his car already in the driveway

Flynn quickly hugged her, “It’s fine, he’ll understand.” She withdrew from the hug and held Julie at arms length with a sympathetic smile before they had to part. Flynn waved as she unlocked her front door and stepped inside. 

Julie took a sharp breath in before doing the same.

---

“So is ‘Clocks move faster / cause it’s all were after’ the first pre-chorus or the second pre-chorus?” Reggie ran his fingers through his hair, his nose scrunching, “Because wouldn’t it just make more sense to have the same pre-chorus on each verse?” 

The brunet’s bass was slung over his body as he rested his hands on the body of his guitar. He looked over to Luke, who was crouched over his lyrics. 

Luke shook his head , his air already dripping with sweat, “It’s the second pre-chorus, the first is ‘Clocks move forward / but we don’t get older.’” He semi, sang, strumming along on his guitar. “Changing it up adds movement, we don’t want to bore the listeners. It keeps the theme of staying young at heart.” 

Reggie nodded and plucked at his bass, testing out different rhythms. Moving his hands up the neck and over the strings, he finally settled on some semblance of a tune, repeating it over and over again. 

Alex joined him, adding a hit on each of the beats of the song. This gave the song a drive and pounding rhythm, working with Luke’s line of ‘Electric hammer to the heart.”

Luke stood up after scribbling something and added his guitar part over it, humming along with the melody, and soon they got well into the song, improvising along the way. There were still some wrong chords and off beats, but they had the bones of what they felt like would be a hit. 

Luke had gone from humming to singing, Reggie and Alex joining in. Luke felt his pulse quicken as he grinned. 

“‘We ain’t searchin’ for tomorrow’,” Alex sang, to which Reggie echoed, “‘Cause got all we need today’.”

Luke bopped along, “‘Living on a feeling that’s been running through our veins.”

They looked back and forth to each other, knowing what was coming next.

Reggie was supposed to have a line to end the bridge, but it hadn’t been written yet. Luke had spent hours trying to come up with something, but it just didn’t click, every line he wrote either changed the meaning of the song or was too clumsy.

Luke sighed as they all stopped playing and he cast an apologetic gaze to the bassist, “I’ll get it. I promise.”

The boy in the flannel just shook his head, “No worries bro, we’ve done a lot in,” He checked the clock on the wall and his eyes widened comically. “Five hours…”

This mock practice session had started in Alex’s garage right after school after Luke had presented them with a song at lunch. 

“It’s totally us,” He had said, sliding to the table with a lunch tray and a scribbled mess of paper, beaming, “Totally mid 90’s. And look, you-,” He pointed to Alex who looked excited but skeptical, “Can start the bridge and you-,” Luke turned his attention to Reggie, “Can echo, ending with…” 

Luke trailed off, he didn’t have an ending line yet, he knew it had to be perfect. Everyone knows you can’t end a bridge without a call to action, something that stirred and emotion so deep that you couldn’t help but sing along. 

He sighed as his mouth twisted, “I don’t know, I haven’t found the perfect line yet.” He looked down at his chicken scratch, then slid the paper across to Alex, who examined it. 

“I like it, have you decided where the harmonies should go yet, or nah?” Alex flipped his blond  hair back, after adjusting it in his snapback. He was already trying to decide what type of beats he would do, where the drum fills would be, and what he should consult Reggie on. 

The makeshift band had a process: Luke would write a basic lyric and chord progression and then he would bring it to the guys. From there Alex would come up with the heartbeat of the song with Reggie. Reggie would work with Luke to see what melodies he should be playing and how he and Luke would bounce off of each other.

When they came together, the three friends would look at who sang what, harmonies, and fill in the gaps in the music. They worked like a well oiled machine

But lunch had been 7 hours ago and it was now 8 o’clock, well past when Luke should have been home. The boy jumped as he looked outside, saw it was dark, and cursed under his breath. He quickly put his guitar on his stand and grabbed his book bag, then ran out with a wave to Reggie and Alex.

“I’ll see you guys tomorrow, if I’m still alive,” he called before getting on his bike and going home. 

The air was damp and it had just rained, making the pavement slippery. Despite being almost winter, the weather was warm enough to where he only had to put on a shirt and jeans to be comfortable.

On his way to his house, Luke looked to the sky. He cataloged some shapes of dark clouds, moose, cat, spaceship, he thought. He chucked to himself, anything could be a space ship, it wasn’t creative enough, all the cloud had to be was somewhat circular. 

His mind drifted to Julie and what she would have to say about these clouds. She would probably smile, her adorable gap showing, and tell him all of the wonderful odd shapes she would see. 

“There, right there, a cat chasing a dog,” She would say, “No, no, scratch that, a dog chasing a cat chasing a pigeon. Wait sorry, a shark without a back fin. Or maybe a line of ducklings crossing a street.” Then she would narrow her eyes as the clouds shifted and formed new images, “Well now I don’t know what I see.” 

Luke would then look over and tell her that everything she saw was amazing, even if it was truly unremarkable. She was always able to see things he couldn’t, even if it was something as menial as a cloud. She could look at him and know exactly what was wrong no matter what; he didn’t know if she was truly super powered, or if he was super transparent. 

Which was why he was glad she couldn’t see him on their calls. 

She knew about Reggie and Alex, they had met before she left, but she didn’t know that they played music together. She didn’t know that Luke was writing songs with them like he used to with her. He didn’t want her to feel replaced.

And as far as she knew, his parents were completely fine with his music. They may have had little gripes here and there, but she thought that was the extent of it. 

As he arrived at his house and opened the front door, that wasn’t the case at all.

“Lucas Patterson!” His mother yelled from the kitchen, “Do you have any idea what time it is!”

Luke winced as she ran into the living room, wiping her hands on a dish towel. He could see that the dining room table had already been cleared and the leftovers put away. 

“It is 8:14! Would you like to tell me why the hell you missed dinner again for the third time this week? No wait! I bet I know! Let me guess, you were at Alex’s!” Her eyes were steel. It wasn’t a question, they both knew the only thing that would keep him out at night would be music with the guys. 

He gripped the strap of his back pack before looking at the floor, his knuckles white. “I’m sorry Mom. I just lost track of time, you know how I get.”

Emily smoothed her brow with her fingers as her husband walked in from the kitchen. “At least tell me you did your homework.” 

Luke didn’t answer.

His mom threw the dish towel to the floor, “Luke we had a deal! You can keep playing your guitar and going to ‘band practice,’” She used air quotes, “As long as you did your homework before then and always made it home for dinner. Always! Your family and school work is important! I know you don’t think so, but as long as you live under our roof, you abide by our rules!”

He threw his hands up and scoffed, “I’m not going to stop playing music, it’s my life! And you can’t stop me! I am sorry if I miss a few family dinners a week, but isn’t that fine if it means I’m happy?” 

His mother looked at him like he had sprouted another head, “Son, I know it’s been hard ever since Julie left, and I know you miss her but--”

“But what Mom? There’s nothing I can do about it, she’s in New York! And the only thing keeping me connected to her is music, and right now, you don’t even let me have that.” Luke stormed through the living room into his room. 

He dropped his bag down with a thunk, and sat on his bed, smashing his head into a pillow and screaming. He regretted that he didn’t bring his guitar back, if only to take out his anger by shredding on volume 10. 

The day kept getting later, and while he didn’t like calling her while angry, he dialed Julie’s phone number. 

The phone rang a couple times before she picked up, “Hello, this is Her Majesty Queen Julie Molina, what is your concern peasant?” She said in a haughty voice, before her façade broke with a giggle.

“Well Your Highness, I have come to discuss today’s weather.” He replied, playing along, her voice instantly making him feel better.

“Today we have seen a couch, a baby, and many many trees.”

“I have also seen many trees; they are very common in the sky.” Luke laughed, “I may have also spotted a suitcase and an umbrella. Sadly my Queen, the rain made it quite hard to see too many shapes.”

Julie clicked her tongue, he could see her face now, her nose scrunched and her mouth down turned, “That is a downright shame. Is there any news to report?’”

Luke perked up at that and rushed to get the words out of his mouth, “Actually, yeah. I wrote a song, ‘Now or Never,’ and it’s actually not that bad. Except I can’t figure out this one line, and it’s been bugging me all day.” He huffed, “Do you wanna hear it?”

She replied just as giddy as he is, “Of course!”

The brunet then launched into singing an a cappella version of his song from memory, stopping here or there to say things such as, “A harmony would totally go here,” or “Add a little guitar riff and it’d be perfect.” 

He kept going until, “‘Living on a feeling that’s been running through our veins’. And then of course another line, and then the chorus.” He was staring at his popcorn ceiling now, smiling like a kid in a candy shop. 

Julie paused, then said, “We’re the revolution that’s been singing in the rain.” 

“What?”

“That’s it, that’s your missing lyric.”

Luke froze, she really couldn’t get any more perfect.

“Queen Julie, you are a genius!” He jumped off of his bed to grab a scrap of paper off of his messy desk before writing down the lyric. “You songwriting genius! If you have stuff like that flowing through your brain, how aren’t you playing it?”

He didn’t mean to bring it up, it just sort of happened. But it was true, how could she be so good at writing and let it go to waste?

Julie cleared her throat, “Well actually--”

“You sang again? I knew it, I knew you would!” Luke cut her off.

“Well no,” She rushed out, he could already see her running her hand over her face in exasperation. He has to stop interrupting people. “I got kicked out of the music program. I haven’t played anything since I got here, and I couldn't either today. I guess that was the last straw, because my teacher called my dad and said that unless I could play something by the end of the week, I need to choose a new elective.”

They sat in silence. 

Luke played with his hands, knitting his fingers together and pulling them apart before an idea came to him, “What about your mom’s song. Not for class I mean! But, if just to sit down at your piano again and play something, what about that? She wrote it for you after all. And then maybe afterwards you’d be good to play for your class and boom! You’re Julie, songwriting pianist extraordinaire again!”

“I-I don’t know about that, Luke,” She swallowed. Right before her mom passed, they had written a song together, but she hasn’t even been able to look at it since she moved. If she sat down to play it, she’d be accepting all of those memories back. But then again, if she needed to sing anything it would be her mother’s song. They had taken a few months to write it, and Julie’s mom had completed it before…

“I mean maybe. I’ll see. I’ll try.” Julie nodded to herself and gave a determinant look to her wall. Tomorrow morning she would go to her garage and play her mother's song.

“You promise?” Luke asked tentatively. 

“I promise.”

“Alright. I guess I should go, it’s probably pretty late where you are. I’ll see you soon?”

Julie nodded, “See you soon.” Then hung up.