#then an hour later sirius will ask regulus to run away and regulus will refuse

[enbysiriusblack]

"I needed you."

Sirius didn't turn to look at the boy staring right at them from across the astronomy tower, instead focusing on the distant stars. Stars that far away couldn't hurt them, couldn't need them, couldn't touch them and ask for just a little attention, advice, a hand to hold. Sirius knew any hand that clutched their own would fall and they'd be left in tears, all alone again.

"I still need you."

Sirius gritted their teeth, and gripped the bottle beside them. Regulus was an idiot, for that. He should know Sirius was unreliable, flimsy, incapable of helping. No matter how hard they'd try, their hand could never hold anyone. Not even themselves.

"Tell me to run away."

Sirius had to force themselves not to turn at that. Regulus running away? Leaving Grimmauld place? The idea... Sirius wanted to say yes. To tell their brother he could stay at the Potter's with them, or they could get their own flat, maybe even Andy would take him in. But what did that mean for Regulus? Would he become just like them? A worthless, friendless, alcoholic, lonely, disowned, family-less, spending every day and night regretting every decision he ever made? Would he kill himself? Sirius had wanted to, almost tried to but they had Regulus to stop them in the end. But with their positions switched? Sirius couldn't save anyone, he only destroyed them. And Regulus running away would destroy him, no matter how hard they tried to help, they'd be killing their brother.

"Don't. Don't run away", they heard the words coming out their sore throat.

Regulus swallowed dryly, "I'll die there, Sirius", his voice cracked.

Sirius restrained themselves from turning, "It'll kill you to leave."

Regulus collapsed right next to Sirius, pulling their face towards his and inspecting them.

Searching their eyes, Regulus frowned, "You look dead."

The corner of Sirius' lip tilted upwards, "exactly."

Regulus turned to the sky, "you're the brightest in the sky."

Sirius seemed to shrink inwards, "not anymore. Not after everything."

"You still are to some people... to the Potters, Pettigrew, Lupin."

Sirius snorted, bringing the bottle to their lips, "Definitely not Remus anymore. Think he hates me more than Snivellus now."

Regulus huffed, standing back up, "You don't think I should run away like you did?"

Sirius gave him a mocking smile, tilting their head and gesturing to themselves, "you like what you see? Think it did me any good, running away?"

"Do you regret it, then?"

"Every so often."

Regulus backed into the wall, closing his eyes in frustration, "What if I turn out worse if I stay there? What if I become just like our parents?"

Sirius threw the empty bottle down the tower and got out a fag and lighter, "You're too good for that, Reggie. You're the heart of the lion, the king of the stars and the jungle and fucking everything. All you gotta do is outlive our dear old parents and bam! You're rich and can do whatever the fuck you want!"

Regulus winced at the yelling, "Why didn't you do that then?"

Sirius sighed, looking back at the stars again, "Cause I'm a screw up, Reggie", he turned back to their brother, "But you're not. You're the best of us. Always will be."

"...I wanted to be just like you when we were younger. You seemed so free, brave, and recklessly happy; fighting like a soldier for something I could never work out."

Sirius snorted, "A pointless fight."

"I think you're still fighting it", Regulus hummed.

Sirius stubbed the cigarette, "I'm glad our parents didn't completely ruin you."

Regulus sat back down, "I guess that means maybe I can survive them, stay there to inherit everything and change the Black name."

"There ya go, Reggie", Sirius ruffled his hair, "Our great king saving us all."

[starchaserwrites]

@jegulus-microfic / february 6: murder / word count: 692 cw: consensual violence(?)

Regulus is having the shittiest day of his life. He started the day with a very detailed text from his lovely mother, reminding him of how much of a disappointment he is for dropping out of college to open a bar with his equally disappointing brother. Later, there was a mistake with the vodka delivery (it was not their usual brand), so he and Sirius had to make some awkward phone calls as the distributor refused to change it. Also, almost too late, they realised that all the ice in stock had melted during the night due to a power cut they weren't aware of, so he and Remus had to rush out to get more. The cherry on top was that the guy he was kind of seeing (mostly to fuck, if he's being honest) decided to get back with his ex, and the thing is, Regulus isn't angry or sad about it, because he saw it coming, but it adds up to the whole situation.

"You look like you're about to murder someone with that knife."

And now James Potter is here.

Everyone knows that if Regulus takes it upon himself to cut the limes, it is because he is at his limit and it is best to stay away. Everyone except James, who seems to have no sense of self-preservation.

"Are you volunteering?" he says without stopping what he is doing.

"Maybe I am. I'm sorry about Daniel, Sirius told me what happened."

"You know his name is Michael, James."

"Yeah, whatever. So what do you say if I help you blow off some steam?" he asks, leaning over the top of the bar.

Listen, Regulus knows he doesn't mean it like that, but he can't help but think of the older man in exactly that way. Blame it on the crush he has had on his brother's best friend for several years. So he just raises an eyebrow at him.

"Oh, I didn't mean it like that." James says after a moment. Is he smirking?

"Then what?"

"Have you ever heard of hurricane shots?"

"Of course, they ask Marlene and Dorcas for them all the time," he replies as he bends down to pick up some empty bottles. It's not rush hour yet, but it's important to get everything ready before then.

"Great, may I have one?"

"Sure, let me call Dorc-"

"From you. May I have one from you?" Regulus bumps his head on the counter as he stands up. James' idea to help him relax is going to give him a stroke.

"Sure." It's the only thing he says before the other man can say anything and he starts gathering what he needs for the shot. "Is vodka okay for your shot?" James just nods, but he can feel his eyes lingering as he pours the alcohol and the glass of water.

Regulus has never done this before but he knows the procedure, he sets everything down on the bartop and shortly afterwards he sits down on the edge of it, opening his legs to let James stand between them. His heart is racing but he looks up to remove the man's glasses (it would be a tragedy if they got ruined) and leaves them beside him. He hands the shot to his victim and rings the small bell they have for this purpose.

"Don't hold back." James says with that grin again as he places a hand on Regulus' thigh and promptly takes the shot, looking him in the eye. Oh, he hates him so much.

Regulus splashes him with the water and then slaps him.

He slaps him. Hard.

James shakes his head and runs a hand over his face to remove the water and his own hair from his forehead, then looks at him with an expression that can only be described as pure devotion, and Regulus knows it.

They kiss. Hard. In a way that only two idiots who have spent years pining for each other can do.

Cheers and shouts from the people in the bar. In the background, Sirius hands Remus some money.

"I knew it would work." Remus says.

[lulublack90]

Prompt 4 - Break

@rosekillermicrofic September 4, word count 648

Previous part First Jegulus part

The rusty van clattered down the pristine street, looking very out of place. He stamped his foot down on the spongy breaks and brought it to a stop. Evan hopped out first, so Regulus could follow, leaving Barty to turn the engine off and make sure the hand brake was firmly on. 

“Are you certain they’re out?” Evan asked. Barty knew he was about as excited to run into Regulus’s parents as he was. 

“Yeah, Fathers at the office and Mothers gone into the city to shop. We have a few hours before either of them comes back,” Regulus told them as he unlocked the heavy front door. 

Barty hated Grimmauld Place. He couldn’t understand how such a beautiful house in a highly sought-after area could be so horrid on the inside. Walburga refused to re-decorate and kept it how her great-great-great grandparents had had it, peeling wallpaper and all. He’d been allowed in a few times as a boy, but when Regulus let it slip that he was in a relationship with Evan, Walburga had refused him entry and threatened to tell his parents. More fool her, he’d told his father just to spite him when he’d started going on about heirs. He didn’t want kids, never had. Secretly he was scared he’d turn out just like his father. Cold and heartless. He’d be the trouble-making uncle for Regulus’s kids. He’d already mapped out his mischievous plans until they were in secondary school and then some. 

He bought himself back to the present and walked into the house, following Regulus straight up to his room. 

Regulus lifted his mattress and extracted a pile of flat cardboard boxes. They began filling them with what Regulus had already sorted into piles and took them out to the van. 

Barty came back in for the last box and caught Regulus staring at the still-full wall of books sadly. 

“I hope she doesn’t hurt them,” He said sorrowfully as he stroked a couple of the spines. “You know if she throws me out,”

“We can come back for them later,” Barty said, squeezing his friend’s shoulder. He knew how much each of those books meant to him. For a while, they’d been all that he had in that house, especially after Sirius had abandoned him. He’d always hate Sirius for leaving Regulus behind. If it had been Barty, he would have dragged Regulus from that house. He would have dug his nails in and drawn blood to haul him away if he resisted. Not just disappear into the night without a second glance. It made his blood boil just to think of it. Gods he needed a smoke break. All this emotional crap was giving him a headache. He pulled the packet from his pocket, tapped out a ciggy and placed it between his lips. He was just about to light it when Evan ripped it from his mouth. Wait until you’re in the van, lunk head!” He snapped. “If burger face gets even a whiff of the smoke she’ll know we were here.” Shit, he hadn’t thought of that. He kicked himself internally. He didn’t want to add to Regulus’s already overwhelming issues with his mother. 

He tucked the stick behind his ear and hauled the last box into his arms before descending the three floors of steps and out into the dazzling sunlight. Out of the cold, dank, lonely house. 

“Right, buckle up kids, we’re in for a bumpy ride!” He cackled before putting his foot down and speeding down the paved road, the poor van protesting the entire way. He honestly had no idea how it was still together, and he had no idea how he would get it though it’s MOT at the end of the month, but that was a problem for future Barty. Right now, Regulus needed him, so the van would have to wait. 

[samynnad102687]

At the beach...

@struttingstag

March 5th Prompt: at the beach | 1409 words

One of James' favourite things to do during the summer, was going to the beach and seeing how far out he could swim before he had to turn back. And since it was one of his favourite things to do, he wanted to invite his boyfriend but every time James asked, Regulus told him he was busy or something would come up as soon as he did. After the third time something came up, James figured Sirius would know what was going on.

"Hey Pads?" James asked cautiously.

"Yeah?" Sirius replied absentmindedly.

"Does- umm. Do you- Never mind." James went back to watching the telly.

"What's up?" Sirius turned towards James and James could hear the concern in his voice. "Did something happen?"

"No, no nothing's happened." James was fidgeting with a loose thread on his shirt.

"Then what's going on? I don't think I've seen you this nervous since you told me you liked my brother." James tensed up slightly but Sirius seemed to catch it. "Did Regulus do something? Did you do something to him?"

"What? No. I would never do anything to him." James snapped his head up. "It's just- I was just thinking. That's all."

"About Reggie?" James nodded. "What did he do?"

"Nothing," James sighed. "He just keeps cancelling every time I ask him to go out, so I guess I was just wondering if he still liked me," James said all in one breath.

"Of course he does. What do you mean he keeps cancelling?"

"Every time I ask him to go to the beach, he says he had something come up or was busy but wouldn't tell me what it was."

Sirius burst out laughing and James looked at him incredulously.

"What's so funny?"

"It's not you that he's avoiding," Sirius said after he calmed down.

"Then what is it?"

"He's avoiding the water. Reggie doesn't know how to swim. Our parents refused to teach us."

"Oh, don't you know how to swim?"

"Yeah, but only because you practically forced me into the water and it became instinct after that. Reggie has been too afraid to even try."

"Oh."

Once James knew why Regulus kept cancelling, he decided to come up with a plan to get Regulus to come with him. James would teach him how to swim if it took him all summer to do it. Obviously, he wouldn't just make him go in the water like Sirius, but then again Sirius had told him that he knew how to swim.

The next day was beautiful and Regulus was coming over after his shift at the bookshop. James was trying to be patient. He wanted to go to the beach as soon as Regulus walked into the house but he didn't want Regulus to run away again if he just sprung it on him. Regulus was sitting on the couch when James brought him a drink and a snack from the kitchen. He had said that it was a busy day at the shop and didn't really get a chance to eat.

"What's on your mind?" Regulus asked nonchalantly after a few minutes of silence.

"Hmm? Oh, nothing."

"Try again. You're never this quiet."

James took a deep breath before he turned towards Regulus fully, pulling his leg up onto the couch.

"I would like you to come to the beach with me today," James said quickly.

"Oh, umm-"

"I know you don't have anything going on and Sirius told me why you don't like going to the beach," he added before Regulus could back out again.

"Why did you ask Sirius?" Regulus asked with a little bite and James looked down at his hands that he started to wring together but didn't say anything. "James?"

"I was worried."

"About what?" Regulus asked, softening his tone.

"I thought you kept cancelling because you didn't like me anymore and didn't know how to tell me."

"Oh, Jamie." Regulus took James' hands in his own. "That's not it at all."

"I know that now but I was still worried." James looked up for the first time. "Will you come to the beach with me? I can teach you how to swim."

Regulus looked apprehensive at first but slowly nodded and James beamed.

An hour later, James and Regulus were pulling up to the car park next to the beach. Regulus had agreed on the condition that it was just them. He said he didn't want to deal with his brother making fun of him because he still didn't know how to swim and he was sixteen. They pulled out the blanket and umbrella before walking over to a secluded spot of the beach and setting everything up. James made sure that Regulus had plenty of sunscreen on since he burned easily. It took a lot for James to burn so he didn't put as much on himself.

James led Regulus to the edge of the water before he could come up with another excuse to stall and they stood there so the water could lap at their feet as they dug their toes into the sand.

"Are you sure it's safe?" Regulus asked as he looked out at the horizon.

"Of course it is. I'm not going to let anything happen to you, Reggie," James replied soothingly. "Do you want me to go first so I can show you?"

"Yeah."

"Okay, but you have to stay here. I don't want you running away again."

"I won't run away," Regulus scoffed offended before he spoke quietly, "again."

James waded into the water until he was up to his waist and turned around to see Regulus still standing on the edge of the beach, looking between the waves that were hitting his feet and James in the water. James held his arms out like the Christ the Redeemer statue and fell back into the waves, going under immediately. When he came back up Regulus had moved closer, although James didn't think it was intentional.

James shook out his hair and started to swim back up to shore where Regulus was. Since he was trying to be gentle, James opted out of sneaking up behind him to grab him and carry him farther into the water.

"Are you ready?" James asked gently as he stood up in front of Regulus.

He still looked a little wary but nodded his head anyway. James held out his hand for him to take, which Regulus did after a moment. James let him set the pace for how fast they went into the water and it took them a couple of minutes before Regulus actually moved forward.

"Did you really teach Sirius how to swim?"

"No, the first time he came to the beach with me, he told me that he knew how to so I basically tackled him into the water. I only found out, when I asked about you, that he didn't know how to before that. He said he learned pretty quick and didn't want me to know that he didn't know how."

"Oh."

They walked slowly into the gentle waves until Regulus was waist-deep. It was a calm day with very little wind. It was the perfect day to learn, granted a pool or something else a little more controlled probably would have been better but James didn't want to deal with the pool today. After standing in the water for a few more minutes, Regulus looked a little less scared.

"Do you want to try to bend down so the water is up to your chest?" James asked gently.

"Umm, I guess so."

Regulus bent down slightly as James guided him with his hand. He refused to let go in case something happened, not that he was expecting anything to happen but just in case. Regulus smiled softly as the waves slid across his body and he ran his hand along the top of the water. He went even farther down without James prompting him. He was calm and James could see that he was just about willing to go farther into the ocean. Unfortunately, there was a loud shriek from the shore and Regulus turned before he stood up straight and walked out of the water.

James shook his head and followed his boyfriend out before pausing next to the person who shrieked, "I really am going to kill you one of these days... or your brother will and I'll sit back and watch."

Also posted on Ao3: Gentle Waves

[jamesisthesun]

jegulus headcanons (in honor of jegulus week)

happy jegulus week!! the amount of times I’ve cried about them this week alone- let’s not talk about it. Anyways feel free to add your own headcanons, I would love to hear them. I’m thinking of making playlists, I’m starting with a jegulus one I’ll add the link on here later on. also if anyone has fic recs please tell me!! just please tell me the title and author (especially if it’s on ao3) just to let you all know, some of the songs might not fit this exact headcanon but they do fit other headcanons, I’m a very indecisive person so I have multiple headcanons, especially revolving around the break up. And I made it a collaborative playlist, so anyone can add songs, just please don’t delete any. -Maria<3

here’s the link<3

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2Hm6RTG4EIiDwPi6xVa6a9?si=LrU5AGLPR6qgzk5CzIV6Cw

enemies to friends to lovers

it all started one night at the astronomy tower

James fell first.

it was awkward at first, but after a while of “coincidentally” finding each other there, they got comfortable with each other

that’s when James realized that Regulus is actually really talkative

they were both talkative, could, and did, spend hours talking. jumping from one subject to another.

by the end of the night they didn’t even remember what they started talking about in the first place

they started talking in James’s 5th year and Regulus’s 4th and started started dating in James’s 6th year and Regulus’s 5th

it was great. although James hated lying to the rest of the marauders, especially Sirius.

but for once, he wanted to be selfish, he wanted to put his happiness before he put everyone else’s. so he did.

and God was he happy

it was weird for him at first, since he had a crush on Lily for years.

their banter continued, especially on the quidditch field

James tried to convince Regulus to run away, but Regulus refused. especially after Sirius ran away

Regulus knew that for Sirius to be safe from their parents he had to stay behind

so he did

James’s offer was still up though

the moment James knew he was in love with Regulus was when he made Regulus genuinely smile/laugh for the first time

Regulus knew he was in love with James while he was rambling about something and James listened to him.

no one had done that before, at least the way James did

he liked it, he loved it. he loved that he was able to talk about his interests and his passions, he loved that the person he was talking to actually listened and seemed genuinely interested in the conversation.

that’s when they first kissed, Regulus made the first move

James froze, he didn’t know what to do

Regulus thought that he ruined what they had, so he pulled away, rambling apologies

he quickly stopped when he felt James’s lips on his

they always met up at the astronomy tower

sometimes in abandoned classrooms

Lily knew about them

she was actually the one that would give James advice

it was great, they were happy

James always called him ‘love’, ‘small star’, ‘baby black’, ‘reg’, ‘Reggie’, etc

James had an infinite amount of nicknames for him

Regulus had some for James to

especially in French, James loved it when he spoke French

‘mon amour/my love’, ‘chéri/darling’, ‘love/amour’, ‘golden boy’, etc

James also loved it when Regulus played the piano

James knew how to play the piano, he learned when he was a kid

he pretended he didn’t

he asked Regulus to “teach” him

he loved to hear Regulus talk, Regulus putting his hands on top of James’s

it was romantic, James was a helpless romantic

Regulus walked in on James playing the piano perfectly one day

to say he was shocked was an understatement

he loved it

they played together all the time

then Regulus got the dark mark

he broke it off with James

didn’t tell him why, James was heartbroken

everyone noticed of course

he didn’t eat as much

he either slept a lot or not at all

never played piano again, he used to always play

he tried to hide it, hide his heartbreak

he tried to be “golden boy” again

he was able to fool almost everyone

but Sirius, Remus, Peter, Marlene, Mary,his parents. they noticed something was going on

he never told them, Lily was the only one that knew

Regulus noticed too, it broke him

James eventually found out about the mark, he was mad, upset, heartbroken all over again

Regulus wasn’t doing much better

as much as he regretted breaking up with James, he knew he couldn’t keep him. It was too dangerous, he couldn’t risk James’s life not that it mattered in the end

it was hard but they were getting through it

then James and Lily started dating

Regulus was heartbroken again but he was happy

he was happy for him

because for the first time in a while, James looked happy

then the war started

they never truly got over each other, especially Regulus

Regulus found out that James and Lily got married and were expecting a child

he was happy for them, worried too, but overall happy

when he found out Peter was a death eater and that Peter had betrayed them he knew he had to prevent it

so when he found out about the horcruxes he knew he had to destroy it

for James

he came up with a plan (with Pandora’s help because they were platonic soulmates and you can’t convince me otherwise)

in his last moments, Regulus thought about James

he had hoped that he saved him, it was the least he could do sinceJames saved him

he thought about how proud Sirius would be

he died peacefully other than the painful fact that he was quite literally drowning knowing that James was going to be fine

he wrote a goodbye letter to James explaining everything

James was heartbroken when he read it

his parents died the same week

it wasn’t easy

he never stopped loving him

they were meant for each other, but they weren’t meant to be together

they were two worlds apart

he also wrote one for Sirius

he never opened it

lastly Halloween 1981 happened

James’s last thoughts were of Harry, Lily, Sirius, Remus

he wondered if Peter was okay

he thought about Regulus, he was finally going to see him again

might make a wolfstar, flowerpott, dorlene, and just different headcanons for different characters in different fandoms so…

also my tiktok is @marvelsfallingkink (same as my tumblr)

[ourloveisforthelovely]

Mother doesn’t know best (one-shot)

Regulus Black AU 

Summary:  Walburga upsets Regulus. You will always be there to pick up the pieces.

Pairings: Regulus Black x Reader 

Rating: M- smut

______

You could tell from the moment that Regulus walked through the door that he was in a hell of a mood. It didn’t take the two of you to be together for so long to know when he was in a horrible mood. You couldn’t help but be curious about exactly what Walburga did to piss your lover off so badly.

Regulus took his coat off and let it drop to the floor. Normally he would have neatly put the garment back in the closet. Regulus hated wrinkles and would have a fit if his coat had the slightest wrinkle on it. You would spend hours listening to him bitch about how annoying and sloppy wrinkles were.

You didn’t say anything as he sat down on the sofa and stared at the TV with a glare on his face. That look...you knew that look very well. Any time that Regulus was the least bit displeased THAT was the look that you saw on him.

Giving Regulus a few moments to cool off, you hung up his coat before turning around. Regulus’ grey eyes were still locked on the television. You crawled behind Regulus and wrapped your arms around him from behind. Normally you cuddling Regulus was enough to calm him down from whatever stupidity that his parents had caused.

Touching was your method of providing him comfort. It had been from the moment that the two of you had become a couple. While you came from a family that wasn’t the least bit hesitant to show each other love and affection, Regulus didn’t. The poor boy was touch starved from the moment that he was born. At first, Regulus was hesitant about returning a hug or letting you snuggle him. It only took a month for Regulus to enjoy the cuddles enough to be wrapping himself around you at any spare moment.

You snuggled your face against Regulus’ shoulder. He didn’t say a word as you proceeded to pepper his neck with kisses.

“Want to tell me what’s eating you?”

Regulus groaned but didn’t say anything. Mentally shrugging, you continued to kiss the same path over and over before getting brave and biting down on his earlobe. Regulus wiggled himself loose and rolled his eyes.

“Just stop, would you?”

Had he not been in the mood from hell, Regulus would have seen how stunned and baffled that you looked. You looked as if you had been knocked off of your imaginary unicorn. Regulus turned and walked out the door to the back garden leaving you blinking after him.

This had been the first time that Regulus remotely took his frustrations out on you. Normally that was never an option. It wasn’t your place to take the blame for his issues “whatever they were.”

You didn’t move to go after Regulus. When he was ready to talk about whatever it was that he was going through...he would come to you.

An hour later, you sat on the couch reading a book that you had borrowed from Remus. You were so lost in the story that you hadn’t noticed that Regulus walked back in. You also didn’t notice the embarrassed expression on his face. Truth was, Regulus felt awful. You didn’t deserve him taking his frustrations out on you. It wasn’t your problem that his mother knew how to suck the life out of anyone within five minutes.

Regulus wasn’t about to tell you that the reason that he was so pissy was because of his mother’s insistence that the two of you produce an heir. You didn’t need to spend the evening and the next few days wondering if you were “good enough” to be his wife. Regulus would stop that from happening at all costs.

As Far as Walburga was concerned, it didn’t matter that Regulus told her that you weren’t physically able to do that. Walburga didn’t seem to understand the words “it will not be happening.” Regulus accepted it and it was time that Walburga did too. If she was so desperate for an heir then she needed to go talk to her eldest son. Regulus assumed that Sirius probably had a few kids running around out there. The way that Sirius “got around” it wouldn’t be surprising if the Black family had multiple new family members that no one knew about.

Regulus waited a few moments for you to say something to him but you didn’t. He smirked when he realized that you didn’t know that he was in the room. Shaking his head, Regulus gently snatched the book away.

“Hey!”

You whined. Regulus gave you a smile before kneeling down in front of you.

“Hi.”

You reached out to stroke your fingers through his hair.

“Hi... I suppose that you are having a bad day?”

You said softly. Regulus nodded, taking his hand in your and kissing each fingertip.

“Something like that. Mum knows how to suck the life force right out of you. It's no wonder my father is nothing but a glorified statue.”

“Wanna talk about it?”

Regulus shook his head. You didn’t expect him to be wanting to talk about whatever it was that Walburga had done. Regulus was never much of a talker when it came to his family. He would put the issue away in an expertly secretive little file in his mind only for it to never be seen or heard about again.

“Would you rather me take your pants off?”

Regulus’ grey eyes rolled up at the prospect of sex. This didn’t surprise you. As much as you wanted to make a comment about Regulus not being so different from Sirius; you decided not to. If you wanted to make your lover feel better comparing Regulus to his brother was not a good idea.

“That sounds nice.”

Regulus replied. He stood up and offered his hand to pull you up from the sofa.

“Bed or here?”

You asked. It didn’t matter to you where the sex would take place. The two of you seemed to have sex wherever the mood would hit.

“Bed.”

Regulus commented before picking you up and carrying you into the next room. He closed the door with his foot before gently sitting you down. You stayed in the same place as Regulus began unzipping your dress. His fingers expertly tugged the zipper down toward your bottom. Regulus wanted nothing more than to tug the fabric off of you but he knew that would get him nowhere except a shopping trip to buy a new dress. The last thing that he wanted was to spend the evening stuck in a dress shop with other husbands who were bored out of their minds. Regulus would rather be feeding you his cock instead.

The moment your dress hit the floor, you turned in Regulus’ arms and pressed your lips to his. The kiss was the same as always...sweet and timid at first before moving to fiery and possessive. You internally smiled at the memory of the first kiss that Regulus had given you. He had been so timid and embarrassed at first. Now he didn’t care where the hell that the two of you were. When he wanted a kiss your lips were his for the taking.

“What?”

Regulus questioned as you started unbuttoning his shirt and tugging the garment out of his slacks. You shook your head with an innocent smile and kissed his chin once more.

“Nothing. Can’t I smile when I kiss you?”

Regulus rolled his eyes.

“There is no such thing as nothing with you. Good try though, sugar. Now, what do you want me to do to you?”

You sat down on the bed before reaching out to unbuckle Regulus’ belt. That was a silly question for him to ask. Regulus was always the more dominant in the bedroom. You assumed this question was always to see how interested you were in what he had to offer.

“Such a silly question, love. I know what you want.”

You replied, running a hand up Regulus’ now obvious erection. He bit his lip as you finally wrapped your mouth around his length.

“I suppose you do know.”

Regulus commented as his eyes fluttered closed. You opened your eyes for a brief moment to see the ecstasy on your lover’s face. Again, you internally smiled at the memory of the first blow job that you had given Regulus. How he lasted a whole five minutes was still amusing to you. The poor love was so embarrassed at the coming so quickly and kept offering promises that once he was inside of you he could definitely last longer.

As the years progressed, Regulus gained an iron grasp on his orgasm. You often found yourself begging him to come already because your jaws or your pussy was so sore from “activities” that you needed a break. There were only a few ways to make him come super quick and he refused to talk about them. Your personal favorite was giving him an inconspicuous handjob at bad times. The most memorable was a few weeks ago at dinner with Walburga, Orion, and a few of the other Black family members. You smiled at the memory…

It was another boring dinner or listening to Walburga and Orion talk about how wonderful their family was. You sat beside Regulus as the dutiful sweet little wife that he adored so much. The less that you caught Walburga’s attention the better. Regulus hadn’t said much that evening. Granted, he normally didn’t say much around his parents. He had learned years ago to keep his trap shut.

As Walburga started talking about Christmas plans, you let your eyes fall to Regulus’ lap. Now would be the perfect time for a handjob. You knew Regulus probably wouldn’t think so. Your prim and proper lover still didn’t exactly love the idea of public displays of affection. A handjob and him coming in front of his family would be a huge “hell no.”

You let your eyes flutter to Regulus’ face. He sat watching his mother with a bored expression on his handsome face. Regulus clearly had not picked up on your playful smile and for this you were thrilled. As carefully as possible, you scooted your chair closer to Regulus.

The moment your fingers stroked over his cock, Regulus’ eyes turned to you. He gave you a warning expression that said “not now” but you weren’t going to listen. So what if he spanked you later? You would have some fun at the time being. You only blinked at Regulus before continuing to lightly stroke your fingertips over his hardening cock. Regulus reached down and wrapped his hand around yours. You assumed that he was going to shove you away but he didn’t. Instead, he forced your hand open to palm him under the table cloth.

Regulus pressed his lips together as you got braver and began unbuttoning his dress pants.

“Y/n, no...please.”

Regulus whispered in your direction. You gave him a playful smirk before wrapping your hand around his length. Regulus discreetly put his hand over his mouth obviously hoping that his parents would assume that he was carefully considering their words. Little did they know what you were actually doing to their youngest son.”

Regulus rocking his hips pulled you from the memory. He whined when you let his cock drop from your mouth. Sitting up a bit straighter, you placed a kiss to his hip bone.

“Want to take me?”

“That’s a dumb question.”

Regulus said as he gently pushed you back on the bed. You knew that he wasn’t going to just shove in. That was for inexperienced kids. He always left you needy and soaking the sheets before ever considering pushing inside of you.

He gently stroked his left hand between your bodies to stroke your pussy. Regulus groaned feeling how wet you were. He knew to expect it but it was always such a pleasant surprise. His middle finger effortlessly slipped inside your opening leaving you gasping his name. Regulus continued to tease you for a few moments. One finger became two. Two fingers were pushing in as deep as possible. He scissored and pumped you to orgasm twice. Each time, as your orgasm approached, Regulus stopped moving. His grey eyes were locked on your face and a small smirk played at his lips. Regulus knew how to drive you wild just as you knew how to push him over the edge.

“Need you now.”

You whimpered as Regulus curled his fingers. If Regulus continued to tease you like this there was no way that you would last long. To your relief, he seemed to want sex as badly as you did. Both of you sighed the moment that he pushed inside of you.

“Take it all, sugar.”

Regulus ordered, trying his hardest to resist the urge to start fucking you as if he was a careless teenager. He stopped himself each time. You didn’t deserve just to have a sloppy mess made out of your pussy. Despite this being about him, Regulus would make sure that you were taken care of. The words “happy wife, happy life” could have never been more accurate.

The soft gentle lovemaking turned hungry and desperate within seconds. You reached up to wrap your arms around Regulus’ shoulders as his skin slapped against yours. The feeling of Regulus’ cock sliding in and out of you before filling you to the hilt was enough to make you want to come alone. Your body twitched involuntarily as the arousal became more intense. Suddenly you felt your body lingering on the edge of orgasm.

“Please don't stop. Please don’t stop.”

You chanted over and over. You were trembling all over as the pleasure exploded. Regulus moaned loudly. The feeling of your body strangling his cock was enough to bring him over the edge. He knew that this wasn’t going to last long from the get-go. Regulus stopped thrusting almost instantly. You could feel his cock throbbing inside of you for a few moments before filling you.

Regulus was the first to break away. He stroked his finger over your nose before lying down beside you. You didn’t fight as he pulled you into his arms.

“Do you feel better?”

You asked, yawning. Regulus nodded and kissed your head.

“You always make me feel better. Maybe a small nap is in order?”

You didn’t argue as you wrapped your arm around Regulus’ body a bit more tightly and prepared for a nap (and round two). Before falling asleep you made a mental note to thank Walburga for whatever it was that she did to him. You would assure her that you were there to calm her baby boy down...just as you always would be.

_______

@amelie-black​ @regulusslut​ @mellifluous-cosmos​ @fandomsxxregulus​ @realgaytrash​ @acciosiriusblack​ @fific7​ @quuenofblacks​ @siriuslyceleste​ @whymyparentscheckmyphone​ @criminalyetminimal​ @hazel-eyes5​ @lucasfilms77​ @exhsle​ @spiderxalmighty​ @rubyroscoe1​ @bennyberry​ @harold-pothead​ @mimisparkle12​ @teletubiswszpilkach​ @zievyimas​ @jessyballet @knreidy1 @brokencasbutt67-writer @authoressskr @moldy-old-boot @hankypranky @summer-novak @shaylybaby2032 @emiwrites3reads @shadows-and-padlocked-hearts @knight-of-gleefulness @stuckinsaudi1 @marichromatic @untoldshortsofthefandoms @deanwherescas @sprnaturallover @shitfaceddaniel @wontlookaway @mycuddlycorner

[angelicamerlinbarnes]

Modern AU: "Lilies"

Severus knows Lily is dead before James comes by to tell him. How, you ask?

Well, because she shows up in his kitchen on Sunday morning, translucent, to yell at him about his life choices.

Severus is living in a rundown old white house that he used to share with his wife Lily. She left him for James, a musician travelling with the other half of his duo act, Sirius. Last Severus heard, the two of them are world famous and Lily and James have had a son named Harry.

As it happened, five years ago James and Sirius had come to town for Sirius to reconnect with his little brother, Regulus. As they had a falling out and a difference of opinion regarding their parentage, their relationship remained just as strained and cold as it had always been despite Sirius’ best efforts. While James spent most of the visit having a smoky and lazy affair with Regulus, he met Lily at the grocery store one day and it was love at first sight. She’d left Severus a month later, choosing to travel the world with James, and had had Harry within the year.

During this visit, Remus, who had been married to Tonks at the time with a child on the way, had fallen deeply in love with Sirius, but had broken Sirius’ heart when he chose to keep his marriage vows rather than run away with him. Sirius tried to keep in touch with Remus after he and James left, but Remus never replied, though Sirius never stopped sending letters. Remus’ wife died two weeks after their son Teddy’s premature birth from complications, and Teddy followed in the hours after. Overwhelmed with grief, Remus shut himself away, only going out for work and to drink. The night he got fired from his job as a teacher, he drank so much he got into an accident on his way home, and is now confined to a wheelchair. That, paired with his self-inflicted scars and depression, led to a suicide attempt that Severus saved him from. Now, Remus is still a recluse, though he now works as a librarian, volunteers at the orphanage, and takes the time to have tea with Severus every day.

Severus grows lilies in his garden in memory of his wife, and nearly dies of a heart attack when her ghost shows up in his kitchen one Sunday morning. She yells at him about throwing away his life for her when she was clearly never worth it and Severus yells back at her for leaving him. But while their new living arrangement is a bit stiff, they remember why they loved each other well enough, so they get on fine, though Lily still cries about missing James and Harry nearly every day.

James shows up in town about a week later with Sirus and Harry in tow, saying he came to deliver a letter Lily left Severus upon her death, since she’d been sick for a long time. Severus invites them in for tea, because he’s British and he’s polite, and Sirius spends most of the time staring at Remus’ house through the window and asking questions about him. James holds Harry on his lap while Lily’s ghost fusses over both of them, though neither of them can see or hear her. Severus still hates James for stealing his wife, but it’s faded into a dull ache by now, especially as seeing James is now a single father, though James does assure him that since Sirius is his partner, Harry will be far from alone.

Though originally only planning to stay long enough to deliver the letter, James decides to stick around for a bit for unspecified reasons. (It’s not because Sirius and Remus both just smiled stupidly at each other for five gay minutes when they were reunited. Of course not.) As he usually leaves Sirius with Remus for the two of them to catch up, James takes to leaving Harry with Severus when he becomes too overwhelmed with grief to take care of him. Severus grows fond of the boy, and often translates Lily’s stories for him since Harry can’t see his mother the same way Severus can.

James tries to patch up his relationship with Regulus, but Regulus is not hearing of it, feeling abandoned and hurt since James left him for Lily. This does however make him more perceptible to Sirius, who is delighted to have his little brother back in his life, though his strained and shy relationship with Remus is wearing on him. Regulus tells James and Sirius that he had a partner, Amir, who died in a home break-in and Regulus, who is trans, suffered a miscarriage of their daughter upon hearing the news. Severus and Remus take care of him, though their own unstable mental states make it difficult some days. Working at the library with Remus helps, he says, but still refuses to speak to James and is tolerating but far from welcoming of Sirius. Only at Severus’ advice that he would be a far happier person if he just allowed Sirius into his life does Regulus begin to open up towards both his brother and his brother’s partner.

James stays at Severus’ house per Lily’s request, and Harry grows quite attached to Severus. Remus begins to spend more and more time with Severus, growing increasingly anxious about his strenuous relationship with Sirius. Lily and Severus begin to slip back into a domestic relationship even though she’s a ghost, and Severus tells Remus about it, believing he’s going crazy. Remus shrugs and says he still hears Teddy crying sometimes.

As times passes, James and Severus slip into a limbo of sorts. As James has become increasingly close to Remus through Sirius, they spend more time together than ever before, and end up falling for each other in their shared grief. Still, despite their unofficial connection, Severus encourages Regulus’ feelings for James, believing them the better match and hoping Regulus can find some sort of happiness after all the shit he’s been through. Unfortunately, this all comes to a head when one day Sirius and Remus break up in an explosive fight, leading James to leave with Sirius and Harry in tow. Severus bids them a bitter goodbye and settles into taking care of Remus and Regulus, both of whom are now far more broken than they were before.

Remus tries to kill himself again. Severus is alerted to this by Lily, who has been doting on Remus since finding out about his and Sirius’ love for each other. Severus races Remus to the hospital, getting him there just in time. Regulus is beside himself, and Severus calls James using the hospital phone, saying he thought he and Sirius should know. James hangs up on him, but shows up in the waiting room with Sirius and Harry three hours later. Severus offers to drive James home, since only family can stay and no one is doubting that Sirius is Remus’ husband even if there are no papers to prove it, and by his rights, Regulus is allowed to stay as well. On the way back to Severus’ house they have a conversation about their feelings for each other, though Severus continues to insist that James choose Regulus instead of him. This evolves into a shouting match until their attention is so far from the road that a semi crashes into them, gravely injuring Severus and hurting James severely, though Harry remains unharmed save a few cuts and bruises. James breaks down over Severus’ body, trying desperately to call 9-1-1, but it’s no use. Severus passes away in Lily’s ghostly arms, James’ screams still echoing in his ears.

Severus wakes up in his house, surrounded by the things Lily destroyed in her anger at him and James over the past few months. Lily is pressing kisses all over his face and crying, explaining that he’s a ghost now too, and stuck with her forever. Severus comments that he doesn’t think that’s too bad, and Lily slaps him but laughs anyway, drawing him into a kiss. They stay wrapped up in each other until James shows up at the house with Harry, sobbing and sagging to the ground in the doorway as both Lily and Severus wrap themselves around him, whispering, “Oh, Jamie…”

Sirius is trying to take care of James and Harry, but he’s pretty much a wreck himself, having been sleeping with a record number of men since his and Remus’ break-up and drinking and smoking his problems away. He’s been writing in manic frenzies, mostly songs about unrequited love, and has spent the rest of his time enduring depressive slumps. Remus is released from the hospital and tries to help him, but is struggling to deal with the loss of Severus, even if he has Sirius back.

Regulus begins to shoulder much of the responsibility of James’ care. He watches over James while Sirius and Remus watch over each other, and comes to care for Harry like a son. Sirius loves him for it, and does his best to pitch in where he can. Though his trust issues and grief are incapacitating, Sirius starts to rebuild his relationship with Remus, this time on a solid foundation of trust and truth, though it takes time. He begins to understand, through their conversations about both of the times they fell in love, why Remus chose to stay with Tonks despite his heart belonging to Sirius, and comes to a new understanding of Lily’s choice of James, as she was already pregnant with Harry by the time she left Severus, and in the minds of parents, children come first. Severus is a bit heartbroken to learn that Lily had cheated on him, but is too tired to truly be angry, and tells Lily it’s in the past now. She smiles at him and kisses his cheek.

James, meanwhile, is working himself into a downward spiral. He’s wondered for years whether Lily ever really loved him like he loved her or if she just chose him because of Harry, and he’s also felt terribly guilty for stealing her from Severus no matter how much he loved her. While he tried to treat Severus right, he knew it was a failed pipe dream from the beginning, as he could never truly keep his heart from Regulus’ delicate hands. Severus and Lily both try to speak with him, but in vain, as he cannot see them.

The ghosts try to take care of Harry, though he can’t see them either. As it comes to be, Sirius and Remus rebuild themselves and each other enough to give Harry and James a stable home. Their partnership with James gives him the strength to keep going, and he begins to make things right with Regulus, who seems happier these days despite all his sadness. As the years pass, Severus and Lily watch their family grow. Sirius and Remus marry, adopting four children from the orphanage where Remus volunteers: Luna, Hermione, Newt, and Draco. They and Harry make friends with the Wealsey children from down the street, and James marries Regulus in a quiet ceremony shortly after tying himself to Sirius and Remus permanently. Lily’s body is moved to their town and buried beside Severus, and the two ghosts settle down in their graves, willingly passing on.

And in case you were wondering… (which I know you’re not)

Remus makes Sirius quit smoking. He and James give up their famous lifestyle for their spouses and children, settling in the town where this all began. Sirius and Regulus build a strong relationship that does not fray or break any longer. Sirius is Harry’s second favorite person after James, and Harry makes Remus take him to visit Severus and Lily’s graves at least three times every year. Sirius loves Remus a lot, but that’s okay, because Remus loves Sirius a lot too.

Sirius is James’ favorite person and he loves him so fucking much - Remus too. He misses Severus and Lily every day, but he’s got their son and the flowers to remember them by. He thinks maybe he could have a Happily Ever After here, maybe. If the world stands still long enough.

Meanwhile, Peter has lived in a homeless shelter since he got dumped by his ex-wife Mary, who is a kindergarten teacher now dating Dorcas the karate teacher and Marlene the bartender. He meets Max and their son Seamus there and falls in love with Max immediately, eventually building a home with them on a generous gift from Sirius that allows him to start up his own bakery. Though Remus offers to put him up every time he visits, Peter always refuses, though he bakes him plenty of thank you muffins once he’s out. James comes to Peter for advice about all of his relationships, and Peter indulges him every time, though really he just wants to bake cookies and sleep. Peter is the happiest person in this story how is that possible

Mcgonogall is the head librarian who listens to hard rock and has her wards (Sirius, Remus, and James) over for tea when she needs to give any of them a swift kick in the rump for their stupid life decisions. Dumbledore and Grindelwald are a married couple who grow petunias in their garden and live next to Mcgonogall, since she and Dumbledore are partners. Grindelwald glares at everyone and everything and Dumbledore hums Beatles songs under his breath off-key and brings an open umbrella on his walks on sunny days, so yeah. The Weasleys are the nutcases who run the orphanage and the homeless shelter, Peggy Schuyler is Newt’s best friend and a schoolmate of the children’s, and life is alright.

Yeah I don’t know what this is either.

[fruitcoops]

Idea for jules staying with coops... Jules gets a bad dream and crawls into bed with them? Only if you want to ofc! I love e everything you write, that k you for sharing it with us! -🌼

Part three! Find Part 1 here and Part 2 here. Sweater Weather/ Jules credit goes to @lumosinlove!

TW for nightmares (plane crashes and cracking ice)

Lily Potter was a goddess. That belief was only solidified when she called Remus the morning of the game and offered to take care of Jules for the day while they went through their regular pre-game rituals. Jules, of course, was only too happy to go—he adored Harry and was still in the stage where babies were just gross enough to be cool.

And yet it was strange having the house to themselves. Remus kept checking over his shoulder for Jules, and Sirius called him down for lunch twice before remembering that he wasn’t there. Hattie got plenty of extra attention in his absence.

They arrived at the rink two hours before game time; there was minimal delay getting out of the house without wrangling a ten-year-old, but to be honest, Remus kind of missed it. Fans were already flooding into the stadium when they arrived and he scanned the crowds for red hair or a pompom-topped beanie, even though Jules was much too small to be easily seen in the rush.

Shake it off, Loops, you’ve got a game to win.

The locker room hummed with energy as everyone taped up and buckled in. Sirius gave his usual fearless-leader speech, Frank’s voice boomed outside, and then they were on the ice.

“Heads up, Loops!” James called, passing him the puck for a quick tap-around. Remus rolled his shoulders out and took a deep breath—he knew he had to trust Lily and the girls to keep an eye on Jules. It’s just a couple hours. Get in the zone.

It was a fast game. The Ravens may not have been the biggest team, but they were lightning on their blades and had a knack for hard hits when the opposition least expected it. Remus got checked twice in the first five minutes alone; that snapped him out of his worried haze quick enough, and he dug his skates in. Time to win.

“Twelve!” he shouted over the roar of the stadiums, slamming the puck toward Sirius and hip-checking number 18 into the boards as he flew past. Sirius caught it—of course he did, Remus thought with a small smile—and looped around for a beautiful goal. “Hell yeah!”

The fans erupted in cheers and he caught a glimpse of Jules’ face near the glass on the opposite side, sandwiched tightly between Lily and Regulus. The last latent tension melted away and he let out a slow breath, skating over celebrate Sirius’ goal.

“I found Jules!” Sirius said, tilting his head toward the glass when he arrived. “He’s okay!”

“I know, I saw!” Remus knocked their helmets together before returning to his position.

The Lions were on fire after that, steady and inevitable against the quick movements of the Ravens. When those blue jerseys tried to slip between the defense, the line tightened and netted them like fish; when they tried to get between the Lions offense, James and Remus circled back around and laid in wait for a pass.

The final buzzer went off and the stadium roared: Lions win, 3-1. Jules was jumping up and down and yelling himself hoarse as the teams shook hands and went back to their locker rooms to clean up for the media.

When all interrogations were vaguely answered and Remus’ hair was dry enough not to freeze in the nighttime air, he and Sirius walked back into the lobby to collect their kid. Jules waved when he saw them from his perch on Regulus’ shoulders—Sirius made a soft noise at the sight and gave Remus’ hand a squeeze.

“Hey, buddy, how was the game?” Remus asked, reaching up for a fist bump when they wandered over.

“It was awesome!” Jules practically shouted. “I got a Twix!”

“Did you?”

“We split one,” Regulus clarified, glancing up at Jules with unbridled fondness. “More of a seventy-thirty situation, to be honest.”

“Got it,” Remus laughed. “Lils, how’s the baby?”

“He napped, shockingly enough.” She turned so they could see Harry’s smushy baby face blinking back at them from his chest wrap. “I don’t think the Ravens worried him that much.”

“There they are!” James appeared in the crowd and swept Lily in for a kiss, then bent to place a  million on Harry’s head until he shrieked with giggles. “Hey, sunshine!”

“Here, my shoulders need a break.” Lily carefully unwound the wrap and helped James slip into it; immediately, Harry reached for his glasses, babbling happily.

“Are you ready to head home, buddy?” Sirius asked Jules, who was watching Harry with wide eyes.

He paused, looked down at Regulus, then nodded. “I guess so. Bye, Regulus.”

“See you later, kiddo.” Regulus bent down to let him off his shoulders, then startled a bit as Jules turned around and hugged him tight around the waist. “I’ll stop by before you leave, d’accord?”

“Thanks for letting me sit with you,” he said, voice muffled by the red sweatshirt.

“Thanks for sharing your Twix.” The edges of Regulus’ eyes crinkled and Remus leaned closer to Sirius’ side, running a thumb over the back of his hand. “Alright, I think our pain-in-the-patootie brothers want to get out of here.”

Jules looked up at him and frowned. “You can say ‘ass’ around me, you know.”

“Jules!” Lily, James, Sirius, and Remus exclaimed at the same time as Regulus burst out laughing.

“What? It’s true!”

“Come on, gremlin,” Remus said, grabbing his hands and letting him stand on his feet as they walked out. “What are we going to do with you?”

“Make dinner?”

Remus laughed, even as the cold air made them all shiver. “I think I can manage that, sure.”

“Lily made pasta for lunch and it was so good.”

“Yeah?” Sirius shared an amused look with him. “I’m glad you had fun.”

“We did a puzzle, and I got to play with the baby, and then we made some cookies—” He closed his mouth abruptly. “I wasn’t supposed to tell you that.”

“Why not?”

“…can I swear?”

Sirius snorted. “Sure.”

“She said the two of you would throw a bitch fit if you found out she made cookies and didn’t let you have any.” He grinned upward as Remus scoffed in disbelief. “Then she apologized for swearing and gave me three.”

“I say we make some brownies with caramel, send her a picture, and then refuse to give her any,” Remus suggested as they reached the car. “Those are her favorite. We’ll see who throws a bitch fit then.”

Sirius made a face and closed the trunk. “I mean, she is taking care of a baby and is married to James Potter. I think she’s entitled to a bit of a bitch fit now and then.”

“Fair point. Buckle your seatbelt, Jules.”

“I always do!”

“Just checking.”

--------------------------------------

Jules was asleep by nine, just as Remus expected. It had been a busy day for him—going to the game would have been enough to knock him out pretty well, but combined with a full day of activity it was a miracle he lasted that long. He took a picture of the sleeping kid and sent it to Lily with a quick ‘thank you’ and the promise of caramel brownies. She really did deserve some.

“D’you want to go to bed?” Sirius asked as he settled down on the couch next to Remus while he read.

Remus yawned and checked the clock; it was barely ten pm. “Yeah, sure.”

They stumbled up the stairs, both dead on their feet and sore as hell, then tugged on pajamas and slid under the covers for a good, solid cuddle. Remus pressed his back into Sirius’ warmth, feeling the heavy tide of sleep roll closer. “Love you,” he whispered in the darkness.

Sirius smiled against the back on his neck and wrapped an arm around his ribs, pulling him even closer with a kiss to the shell of his ear. “Love you, too, mon loup.”

Remus dreamed of ice. A frozen pond, to be specific, where Jules flew past him on his skates and Sirius followed, both laughing so hard they gasped with it. Sirius caught his hand as he passed, pulling him along as the three of them—no, five, his parents were there as well—looped in wide circles.

A bolt of fear shot through him when he heard the telltale sound of cracking ice and he reached for Jules’ coat collar; the soft fleece of the inside brushed his fingertips, but he was too far away to pull him to safety. Jules was going to fall. Didn’t he hear it? Didn’t he understand?

“Re?” A soft, terrified voice broke through his dream and his eyes flew open. The room was dark, save for a bit of light from the hallway. Sirius was still against his back, breathing steadily as he slept. And Jules was standing about a foot away from the edge of the bed with tearstains on his face.

“Jules?” He scrubbed a hand over his cheek and sat up. “What’s going on?”

“I had a nightmare.” His lower lip trembled as he stared at Remus, clearly shaken.

“Oh. M’kay.” Next to him, Sirius inhaled deeply and shifted, reaching for him; Remus brushed his dark hair off his face and shushed him softly. “Go back to sleep, love.”

“I didn’t mean to wake Sirius up.” Jules sniffled and blinked a couple times.

“Don’t worry, buddy, it’s fine. Do you want me to tuck you back in?” Jules shook his head as tears spilled over and Remus swung his legs over the edge of the mattress, pulling him close for a hug. “Hey, shh, you’re alright. You’re alright. I’ve got you.”

“It was awful,” Jules sobbed, clinging to Remus’ shoulders as he buried his face in his chest.

“What was?”

“My nightmare.”

“Can you tell me about it?” Jules shook his head; Remus kissed his forehead and kept his lips there, closing his eyes. “Oh, buddy.”

“ ‘s everything okay?” Sirius mumbled as he sat up. He frowned in the dim light before he saw the two of them and concern covered his face. “What happened?”

“Jules had a nightmare,” Remus explained quietly. Jules pulled away and wiped furiously at his face with his sleeve.

“I’m fine.” His voice broke on the last word, though, and he stared down at the floor.

“It’s okay if you’re not,” Sirius said gently, scooting over to see him better. “Nightmares are really scary.”

Jules’ breath caught. “I dunno if I can go back to sleep.”

“We can stay up for a bit.”

Remus tipped Jules’ chin up and wiped a stray tear away. “Do you want to make hot cocoa?”

A sniffle. “Yeah.”

“Alright, come on.”

Sirius stood up as well, which seemed to surprise Jules if his lingering look was any indication. He plastered himself to Remus’ side as they walked into the kitchen, then climbed up to sit on the countertop as Remus began collecting ingredients. Sirius dampened a paper towel with warm water and tapped his nose with it to make him smile before handing it over so he could wipe his face.

They worked in silence for a few minutes until the milk steamed and Sirius took three mugs down from the cupboard. Remus leaned on the counter and made sure Jules had taken a few sips of cocoa before he spoke. “Do you want to talk about it?”

Jules shook his head, then paused. “The plane crashed.”

“Which plane?”

“Mom and Dad’s.” Tears welled up in his eyes again and Remus reached over to rub his back. “They couldn’t get out.”

He heard Sirius sigh and gathered Jules up in his arms, giving him a little squeeze. “That sounds really scary, buddy.”

“It felt so real.”

“I promise it wasn’t.”

“How do you know?” The hint of a sob hitched in his voice and Remus let go of him for a second to grab his phone off the counter.

“Here.” He unlocked it and tapped the text app, holding it out. “See? I talked to mom this morning when she wished us good luck for the game. They landed safely and have the memorial tomorrow.”

“Oh.” Jules reached out and touched the screen, snuggling against Remus as he nodded. “Thanks.”

“No problem. Do you feel any better?”

“Yeah. Sorry I woke you up.”

“I’m glad you did,” Sirius said over his mug of cocoa. “It’s hard to deal with that alone.”

“Do you want to try to sleep, or should we stay up a little longer?” When Jules stayed silent, Remus wracked his memory for whatever he could remember about dealing with nightmares when they were kids. “We could put the Princess Bride on?”

Jules nodded and slid off the counter, cupping his mug tightly between his hands as the three of them padded into the living room. Hattie jumped on the couch and curled up on top of Jules’ feet with a low, contented rumble. Sirius set up the movie as Remus tucked a blanket around their legs, then joined them on the sofa as the opening credits began.

Fifteen minutes later, Jules was stretched across Remus’ lap with his head on Sirius’ thigh, snoring under his breath. Remus put his arms beneath his knees and shoulders and stood, walking slowly toward the stairs as Sirius turned the movie off and put their cups in the sink. He tucked Jules back in, placed a kiss on his forehead, and left the nightlight on just in case before going back to their bedroom. I was easy to fall asleep after that.

-----------------------------------

“Hello? Can you see us?” Remus set the phone up against the toaster.

His mother’s face broke into a wide smile. “There you are! Hi, boys!”

“Hi, mom!” Jules beamed at her, nearly bouncing right out of his chair.

“Where’s Sirius? I don’t see him anywhere.”

“Oh, I’m here.” He stepped into frame, waving shyly as he set the duster down. “Hello.”

“There you are, honey! I was afraid they’d chased you off already,” she teased, making all of them laugh. “How have you been? Has anything exciting happened? We miss you so much.”

“Things have been good,” Remus said, propping the phone up with a spare fork as it began to slide down. “We’ve had so much fun, right, buddy?”

“Yeah! I get to go to practice, and see the games, and we watched Jurassic Park—”

“Of course you did,” his father said with a playful eye roll.

“—and we’re hanging out with Leo and Logan and Finn this afternoon to play board games since practice is in the evening!”

Remus shared a look with Sirius, both of them stifling their laughter at his overwhelming enthusiasm for their weekly routine. “We’ve definitely been busy.”

“We’re so glad you’re having fun.” Lyall smiled. “Grandma Lillian sends her love. We all watched the game yesterday—great job, both of you!”

“Thanks, Dad,” Remus laughed. “Yeah, the season’s looking good.”

“Well, we don’t want to keep you too long,” Hope said. “You’ve got a long day ahead of you and we just wanted to check in. Re, keep sending us updates, and Jules, behave. Sirius, we’ll keep you in our thoughts and prayers.”

“I appreciate it,” Sirius said with a grin.

“Love you!” Lyall added as they waved goodbye.

“Love you, too!” Jules and Remus chorused. The screen went dark a few moments later.

[up-to-some-good]

Part 2: 5 times I fixed it...

“No,” Lily said simply.

“You’re being unreasonable,” James responded.

“How?” she asked furiously. “How is it unreasonable to not want to put your best friend in danger?”

“Because he’ll be in danger no matter who we pick, Lily! He’s the obvious choice and everyone knows that.”

She leaned back in her chair and sighed. Before today, she would have said the day her parents died was the worst day of her life. Finding out her baby was being hunted by a maniac was worse. She and James had been fighting for an hour over the secret keeper.

She knew Sirius would do anything for them. He would die for them. She didn’t want that. She wanted him to be safe as much as she wanted Remus home from wherever he was and James away from the battlefield. They were her people; she couldn’t handle losing any of them.

“We need to find a compromise,” James said.

He crouched on the floor in front of her and grabbed her hand.

“He’s my brother, Lils,” he whispered. “I want to protect him too. He’s the one we can trust to protect us.”

“He isn’t the only one,” she whispered back.

James leaned back on his haunches and stared up at her. His glasses were skew on his face and his hair was more ruffled than usual since he’d pulled at it in frustration. All she wanted to do was run her fingers through it and pull him to her chest, comforting him.

“What do we do?” he asked.

“We let everyone think it’s Sirius,” she said. “He goes into hiding as if he were, but we pick someone else.”

“Who?”

“Alice,” she said simply. “One week ago, her and Frank were considering hiding for the same reason we were. She’s the closest thing I have to a sister since Petunia refuses to speak to me. She’s off duty at the moment, staying home with Neville. We can trust her.”

James nodded and leaned towards her.

“I trust you,” he said. “We’ll do it that way. I’ll talk to Pads.”

“Talk to Pads about what?” another voice came from the door.

Sirius stood in the doorway with two cups of tea. More voice could be heard from the hallway. The meeting had clearly finished while they were arguing.

“Thought you could use some refreshments,” Sirius added, handing each of the Potters a cup of tea. “What did you want to talk to me about?”

“We have to go into hiding,” James said. “Voldemort’s after Harry.”

Sirius closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Lily reached over and squeezed his knee. She had watched him with Harry whenever he was at their house. The boy may as well have been his son with how much he loved him. Any of them would do anything for the baby.

“What do you need me to do?” he asked hoarsely.

He opened his eyes to look between them, his eyes glossy with unshed tears.

“We need you to go into hiding as well,” James said. “Dumbledore suggested to Fidelius Charm, and you’d be the obvious choice for secret keeper.”

“Which is why we’re picking someone else,” Lily added quickly. “But as further security we need people to think it’s you.”

Sirius nodded.

“I can do that,” he said. “But don’t tell me who you’re picking. If they do get to me, I don’t want to have any information that could help them find you.”

“We’ll make sure Moony and Wormtail know where you are,” James said quietly. “Moony can stay with you when he’s here, and Wormtail can check on both of you.”

“Are you sure?” Sirius said. “That we can trust them, I mean.”

He had been looking for confirmation for weeks, holding on to any thread of trust that he could. It was inconceivable that Remus would betray him, but everything that was happening felt inconceivable.

“We are,” Lily said gently. “I know Remus has been gone a lot recently, but he loves you. He wouldn’t betray you.”

Sirius nodded, finally letting his tears fall and crying silently.

“I’m gonna head home,” he said, standing. “Pack a bag and find somewhere to stay. You two be safe. Give Harry a kiss from me.”

James got up as well and pulled him into a tight hug, both crying into the other’s shoulder.

“We’ll see you soon, Padfoot,” he whispered when they broke apart.

The next day, Alice and the Potters met in Godric’s Hollow and performed the Fidelius Charm. Sirius met with Peter and Remus in his new flat in London before Remus left on a new mission to explain the situation. He told them he was the secret keeper, that small bit of doubt resting permanently in the back of his mind.

Three weeks later, Remus returned to the flat to find it empty. There was no sign of a struggle, but Sirius’s wand lay broken on the counter.

“Fuck,” he muttered.

He tore through the flat before finding the thing he was looking for. He stared into the reflective glass and tried to wipe his eyes and make himself seem less dishevelled.

“James Potter,” he spoke clearly into the glass.

“Siri…” James stopped when he saw Remus.

“He’s gone,” Remus croaked. “I just got back and he’s not here. His wands broken. Peter…”

“Fuck,” James said.

“Prongs, you have to leave, now,” Remus said. “If they… you’re not safe anymore.”

“Fuck, Moony,” James repeated. “He’s not the secret keeper. We’re safe.”

Remus sat down heavily; the mirror clutched tightly in his hand.

“We wanted everyone to think it was him,” James continued. “But we picked Alice. He doesn’t know who it is so he can’t even give them that.”

“They’ll kill him when they find out,” Remus whispered.

“I’m so sorry, Moony.”

In a few hours, Peter Pettigrew was known to be the spy by the whole Order. Remus set out with Frank Longbottom to try find him. Finding Sirius was thought to be a suicide mission. Remus was willing to take it, even if that was the case, but Dumbledore wanted to protect his assets.

After two months, they gave up looking for the rat. He had disappeared. They speculated he was taking on his full potential as a Death Eater, or perhaps living as a rat somewhere else. Remus returned to his work with the werewolves. There was no word on Sirius’s whereabouts or whether he was alive.

Regulus Black appeared late one night at headquarters, half dead and clutching a locket. He explained to Dumbledore what he had done to defeat Voldemort and joined the Order, on special assignment to hunt down and destroy the horcruxes.

Six months after the Potters went into hiding, the Order of the Phoenix infiltrated the Lestrange Manor. Regulus Black killed Lord Voldemort in the middle of the battle and the Death Eaters began to flee. The Order searched the Manor and found a single prisoner – Sirius Black, alive, but barely.

Remus ran to him and pulled him into his arms, casting as many healing spells as he could think of.

“’M sorry,” Sirius muttered. “Thought ‘twas you.”

“Don’t apologise,” Remus whispered back. “You’re alive, and that’s what matters.”

“Love you.”

Remus kissed his forehead gently and held him as tightly as he could.

“I love you so much, Pads.”

[twoidiotwriters1]

Written In The Stars CXXXIX (Harry Potter xF!Oc)

A/N: I’m scared to see how you guys will react to this one, hope you at least find it enjoyable despite my very self-indulgent plots -Danny 

P.S. Huge s/o to @bwbatta​ bc I decided to update my fic and now I have pretty dividers in all my books! Most of the ones I ended up using are her work so go check it out :)

Words: 4,641

Series’ Masterlist

Book V // Next Chapter

Listen to: ‘Need Your Love’ -by Joshua Wicker

Chapter One: Dumbledore's Mission.

"A galleon says Erick will crash the car —"

"Shut up!"

"Don't make him nervous," Emily scolded Harry. "If you continue this I won't teach you how to drive!"

"We don't need to learn," Mel snorted. "We'll apparate everywhere..."

"I thought you hated it," Her mother raised a brow.

"Yeah, but she's lazy," Harry smirked.

"Why is Harry here? He's not allowed to leave the house, is he?" Mel frowned.

"He's not allowed to be alone outside, there's a difference. We're babysitting two infants, unfortunately..." Erick taunted.

"What's the matter, Flint? You have stage-fright?" Harry replied.

"Oh please, he feeds on attention! Like a dementor but in a more annoying way..."

"Enough!" Emily looked over her seat. "Is that the kind of things you want to teach your brother?"

"I doubt he'll remember any of this!"

"We know he can do it, Em, we're just teasing," Harry said blithely.

"Yeah, he's the only adult here apart from you, mum. It's kind of his obligation to be good at driving."

The baby let out a squeal of agreement, he was three weeks old but had a good set of lungs that he was happy to use at any given time, especially while everyone was sleeping.

Harry leaned and checked that the baby's blankets. Mel beamed at the sight, the boy had pretty much adopted the boy as his own brother, which she thought made a lot of sense, not only because it was Sirius' son, but because he'd been part of her family for so long that anything else would've been silly.

They were well aware that bringing little Regulus to their driving lessons was a bit risky, but Emily wasn't as keen to leave Mel and Harry alone in the house as she used to, so she put a few safety spells on the chair once the baby was seated while Harry and Mel sat on both sides of it.

Erick turned out to be a good driver, but he still had a bit of trouble understanding how cars worked.

"I have to be pulling and pushing stuff all the time!" He complained as he activated the windshield on accident for the third time. "Why can't I just turn the key and press the pedal?"

"Cars don't work like that," Emily said patiently. "It's complicated, but you're good!"

"He's only gone up and down the street for half an hour, Leggie fell asleep already," The girl huffed.

Emily looked over the seat once again, she was frowning. "Erick, switch seats with Mel."

"You're joking... right?"

"Erick," The woman repeated.

"On it," He said happily. "C'mon Mel, are you scared?"

Ten minutes later, Erick was in the backseat and she was tightly holding onto the wheel.

"I'm doing it!" She said. "Is not that hard, is it?"

"A slug could move faster," Harry was looking at the roof of the car and dying of heat. "I thought you were going to be more... the reckless type of driver."

"Me too..." Erick agreed lazily, he was playing with one of Reggie's feet.

"I'm not going faster, my brother's in the car!" Mel scoffed.

"We're not asking you to! Just enough so we can feel like we're actually moving!"

"Bringing you three was a bad idea," Emily said over the boys' laughter.

"Fine!" Mel pressed down the pedal, the car immediately gaining speed. "I'm was just being careful!"

"Which makes me proud," Emily softly patted her shoulder. "It feels like it was yesterday when you were running around Remus' house in nothing but a diaper and now you're driving!"

"The other night I ran into her wearing no pants, so she's hasn't changed really," Erick murmured nonchalantly. "I stepped on Grey's tail thanks to that... maybe that's why he hates me so much."

"What?" Harry's head snapped to the side so fast he hurt himself.

"I forgot you live here now! Sometimes I sleep like that, s'not a crime!" She looked at Harry through the rearview mirror. "I've been an only child for sixteen years, sometimes I forget there are more than two people in my house..."

"I'm surprised her scream didn't wake up Leon," Erick sniggered.

"He's a heavy sleeper like his dad," Emily responded distractedly.

The conversation died instantly. It wasn't the woman's intention, of course, but it'd been only a few weeks since Sirius' passing, sometimes they would forget for a moment, just a brief second, then one of them would talk about Sirius and everything would start again...

It was painful, and it was weird. Mel had never endured something like this with anyone except Harry. Having a larger group of people sharing the same pain was strangely comforting.

Mel cleared her throat. "It's Harry's turn..."

"I'm okay," He said quickly. "I can learn another day..."

"Glasses, you and I have a tradition of experiencing things at the same time," The girl stopped the car and turned to look at him. "You're not going to ruin our streak. Besides, I need to know if I'm better than you."

Harry stared at her in amusement, then he looked at Erick.

"Is it fun, having her bossing you around all day?"

"I boss her around too," Erick smirked.

"They take turns," Her mother sighed.

"I'm sorry to hear that," Harry gave the woman a look of sympathy as he stepped out of the car.

"There are worse things than being stuck with two pushy teenagers..."

"Hey!"

"Sorry," Emily smirked. "A pushy teenager and a pushy adult."

"If it annoys you that much I'll move out," Mel offered humorously. "What d'you say, Prince? Should we try our luck outside our comfort zone?"

"You wouldn't last a day," Erick taunted.

"Fiddlesticks," Mel muttered, to which Harry laughed.

It was around three in the morning when someone knocked on her door. She'd been awake for a while now, so she stood up and opened it.

"Hi," She rubbed her eyes. "What's up?"

"Can't sleep," Erick mumbled. "Care if I stay a moment?"

"Go ahead..."

She went back to bed, Erick sat at the edge and stared at her for a moment. Grey let out a sleepy growl, curling further away from his reach. Erick pulled out his pocket watch, now hanging from a chain he'd found in Regulus Black's room back in Grimmauld Place. The reason why he'd taken it was unknown to Mel.

"What's up?" She mumbled, suppressing a yawn.

"I'm thinking."

"About?"

"How lucky I am."

Mel let out a puff of air without replying. He would do this often, say he was lucky to be there, that she'd saved his life... She just wanted him to shut up.

"I really don't want to punch you, Prince, I'd ruin your pretty nose."

He smiled, unbothered.

"You know, a few years ago you would've been pleased to hear me say that, you ungrateful git."

"Yeah well, a few years ago my biggest dream was to become a princess," She joked. "So you see my priorities were a bit messed up..."

"You'd make a cute princess."

"C'mon —"

"I mean it."

"Erick," Mel said in a tone of warning. "Stop."

He'd been acting like that for a whole week: flirting when no one was around, complimenting her... Mel had closed up so tightly around herself that she was barely capable of saying I love you to her mum. Erick had lived deprived of affection his whole life and was just getting out of that environment. At what point had she become the cold, distant one, and he the ray of sunshine?

She knew right away what he was trying to do, but she was so numb... Mel cared about him, but she was not there yet.

Erick leaned on the wall and tilted his head a bit so he could look at her.

"I'm sorry."

"Why?" She replied. "It's not your fault... I just — I need time."

He nodded shortly.

"We can talk later?"

He was wonderful, but she was in the middle of all that was wrong in their world, right next to Harry and the lifeline that she still hadn't decided whether she wanted to keep or not.

"We should go to bed," She murmured, still unable to make any real decisions for herself.

"Yeah," He stood up, carefully putting the blankets back in place and dropping them all over Grey on purpose. He put the watch back in his pocket as well. "Sweet dreams, Mely."

The Ministry of Magic

PROTECTING YOUR HOME AND FAMILY AGAINST DARK FORCES

The Wizarding community is currently under threat from an organization calling itself the Death Eaters. Observing the following simple security guidelines will help protect you, your family, and your home from attack.

"I have a better way to protect our house," Erick groaned, he was gently rubbing his temples. "Let Leon cry the whole night and not even Voldemort will try to enter... I myself am starting to consider living on the street just to get away from the noise."

"S'not that bad," She answered, the dark circles under her eyes giving her away. "It's hard to get used to being a human, you know?"

"Look at this," Emily unfolded the newspaper. "'Scrimgeour succeeds Fudge' — Well, haven't met him yet but I hope he's got a bit of brain, Tonks told me a few months back that he's certainly a bit brisker..."

The doorbell rang and Mel left to open the door.

The routine at that point was established even if it had been only two weeks since their arrival; Erick got used to life at Privet Drive quite easily, he spent two whole days examining every corner of the kitchen, and when Mel showed him what a movie was, he wasted a whole day in the drawing-room watching the movie adaptations of the books she'd lent to him.

Harry would go daily to check on"Reg". Once he'd stayed the night but refused to sleep in Mel's room, not that she'd tried to convince him otherwise.

"Goodmorning," She opened the door without paying attention, "you're a bit late for breakfast but I'll let it pass as soon as you —"

She stopped talking at the sight of her great-uncle, Dumbledore smiled at her and walked in.

"I can't stay for breakfast, but I dare say I regret it deeply."

"Professor... I — Is everything okay?"

"Certainly."

"To what do we owe the pleasure?"

Mel turned to see her mother standing near the stairs, gazing at Dumbledore coldly.

"Emily," Dumbledore said. "Good morning... I'm here to speak with Mr Flint."

"Is he in trouble?"

"Quite the contrary, I believe he's never been better."

"Professor," Erick's posture changed when he walked into the room, suddenly he looked more like a young man and less like a boy. "What can I do for you?"

"I have a mission for you... Mel as well, but only if she wishes to go."

"She's not of age," The woman replied quickly.

Mel was ready to accept whatever it was he wanted her to do, she needed to feel like she was doing something. Although she wasn't exactly happy to see him so soon after the end of their last term.

"As I said, only if she wishes to come. I assure you she'd be safe."

The girl looked at her mother and then at the men standing in front of her.

"Can I hear what this is about first?"

Emily crossed her arms without uttering a word, her uncle signalled towards the couch.

"A word, then?"

Erick nodded, making a beeline to the closest armchair. Emily turned to leave, but Dumbledore spoke again.

"You can stay."

The woman shared a look with her daughter, Mel couldn't hide her eagerness to hear what the old man had to say.

"I won't sit there and watch history repeat itself," Emily sighed.

The woman left before Mel could say anything. She would talk to her later, but first, she needed to talk to Dumbledore.

"I beg you not to interrupt me while I speak."

Both pupils silently agreed to his petition.

"Now, I find myself in need of a new Professor, but the man I'd been contemplating for the job has been on the run for almost a year — He's not guilty of any crimes," He added, noticing the way their faces grew worried. "He's just afraid like everyone else... I need you to track him down and point me to where he is so I can have a word with him."

"I'll do it," Erick responded instantly.

"Alone?" Mel frowned.

Dumbledore stared at her for a second too long.

"If I remember correctly today is your sixteenth birthday, isn't it?"

"Yes."

"Mr Flint turned seventeen in January — You may know that's considered to be the start of our adulthood."

"Yes."

"Erick is allowed to do magic outside school... But you still have a year left."

"I don't see  —"

"You have Matthew's spirit when it comes to saving a friend, Mel. When you were eleven you left this house with Hagrid so you could look for Harry yourself... The time has come for me to finally be honest with you."

"What do you mean 'finally'?" The words were burning a hole in her brain. "You mean all the things you told me when I was in your office last month... that wasn't it?"

Erick stared at them with polite interest, even though she knew he was dying to ask. Mel hadn't told him a thing about that night out of respect for Harry's privacy.

"That was all I had to tell you regarding the Harry," Dumbledore replied. "There are plenty of things I haven't said, and I wish to talk about them with you."

"And if I agree to go with Erick on this mission... you'll tell me?" Mel raised a brow.

"I'll tell you whether you help me with this or not, but I believe there's nothing else I can teach you, Mel. All that's left for you is to start putting your knowledge to use; I recommend you to go on this mission."

"What about my animagus lessons?"

"Ah, yes," Dumbledore smiled. "I'll help you with that, but that'll be it. You've concluded your lessons with the highest marks, dear girl."

She would've been elated hadn't been because of the strange way her uncle was acting.

"Aren't you happy?" Erick nudged her arm gently. "You've worked hard for years, you should be proud!"

"I am proud," Mel replied shortly. "And I'd love to help, but I can't leave my family, it's not safe."

"They'd go to the burrow if you leave."

"What about Harry?"

"He'll go to the burrow too, but I have a few matters to attend with his family first."

"If Mel wants to stay that's alright, I can go on my own —"

"You can't."

Erick looked at her irritated.

"It's not like you can do magic outside school."

"It takes more than magic to survive out there — You don't know how to blend in with the muggles, do you?"

"You can discuss this throughout the day," Dumbledore grabbed a letter from his pocket. "In this, you'll find all about Horace Slughorn's last known whereabouts and a picture so you can identify him. If you do, don't approach, he'll know you're following him. As soon as you find him come back to Privet Drive and write to me."

"This is all just in case we decide to go, right?"

"I'm going," Erick scowled at her.

"We'll talk about this after dinner," She glared back.

Dumbledore stood up and they followed, Emily was at the entrance ready to let him out.

"I'll wait for your response, then," Her uncle stared at her for a moment. "You and Harry..."

"We haven't decided," She was quick to reply. "We need time."

"Very well."

"You're quiet."

"I have a lot to think about."

Her day had been slightly ruined by her great-uncle's visit. Although Lupin had been there for a couple of hours and stayed for dinner. Mel and Erick talked about the mission and she'd promised to tell Harry after the party was over, which was now.

The Slytherin was upstairs taking a shower and Emily was putting Reggie to bed. Mel and Harry were sitting on the grass, watching the stars above them. She'd fallen into contemplative silence, pondering what to do. She could go chase some stranger for Dumbledore's benefit, or she could stay and look after her family.

"This would be much easier if my mum had asked me to stay!" She pouted.

"I reckon she knows that," Harry responded, throwing small rocks over the fence.

"Won't you?"

"Hmm?"

"You won't ask me to stay?"

Harry stared at her.

"No."

He didn't explain his reasons, but he didn't need to. Mel had made up her mind even if she didn't want to admit it. That was exactly why she was so upset, she wanted to look after her family, but her responsibilities were keeping her apart. Three years of hard work had led to this, and although Mel was a big sister now, winning the war was more important than changing diapers.

Her mother was a whole different problem too. Around them she was always cheery, but Mel was sure she'd heard her cry when none of the boys was around to hear.

She believed it was about Sirius, but it could also be about her and Harry, that she was scared for them. Mel didn't have the heart to lie if her mother were to ask about the prophecy. It was, as they had agreed without even having to speak about it, too much weight to put on their loved one's shoulders. The idea of Emily, the closest thing to a mother Harry ever had, finding out there was a big chance one of them would die after having lost Sirius in such a brutal way...

"I don't think I'll be able to look at Dumbledore in the eye if I come back empty-handed..."

"You're one of the best witches I know," Harry shrugged. "You'll be fine, just try not to murder Flint while you're away."

"He's less annoying now," She grinned. "Ever since he left his parents' house, dunno, he's improved. Although I might murder him if he doesn't stop —"

She was going to say 'flirting', but for some reason, she didn't feel ready to talk about that with Harry. She wasn't ready for anything and yet the world was forcing her to keep moving, it was exhausting.

Mel got up and offered her hand to her friend.

"Do you remember when you were just Harry and I was just Mel, and we were the odd kids at school?" She fixed her gaze on her bedroom window. "Wish we could go back to that."

"When I didn't know I was a wizard?"

"Things were easier back then, don't you think?"

"Maybe," He retorted. "But they were never entirely good."

In Harry, Mel found another reason to stay.

They could have the summer to talk about the things they needed to. She would stare at his aged features and compare them to the ones of that young boy she used to call her best friend...

Their bond still had thousands of cracks that had to be fixed, Mel was having a hard time letting him in again and they needed to be okay in order to know if they wanted to keep the lifeline or not. It wasn't that she didn't want to like him, she wanted the comfort he used to provide, the warmth and security of having someone who understood.

He knew it, and he was trying his best to not mess it up, but Mel didn't want to love him again, cutting the lifeline was the best way to assure that... It was easier said than done, though.

Harry was confused. Sometimes it felt like nothing would ever happen, then an overwhelming affection would crush his chest whenever Mel laughed or touched him. He didn't want to put a name to it, he was terrified of saying it, even to himself. All he knew was that the connection was a way to make sure Mel would be safe, and he didn't want to give that up.

"I should go."

"Yeah..."

"Happy birthday," He said. "I have to be honest and tell you that your present was meant to be sent last Christmas, but..."

"I didn't give you a present either, it's okay... I'm a bit angry though, that was a missed opportunity, I could've won."

Harry laughed.

"You'll have a new chance this year, but I doubt you'll be able to beat me — I've already gotten yours..."

"It's July!"

"I know," His smile vanished suddenly, then he added. "Be careful out there, please."

"Erick'll make sure I don't do anything stupid," Mel smiled. "He's so obsessed with protecting me — as if he didn't know I can do it alone just fine!"

"Yeah, but now's different."

"Different how?"

"We need you alive," He told her. "You want to live long enough to become Headmistress, right?"

Mel froze, not knowing what to answer.

"What?" Harry tilted his head.

"I lied," She blurted out. "I never wanted to be Headmistress — I saw you that night, in the mirror... I saw..."

"What?" He asked again, this time softer.

"You kissed me. A real kiss... like the type we used to gawk at as children."

Harry cleared his throat. "Oh."

A tense silence surrounded them. The variations of colour in his eyes were remarkably easy to notice from where she was standing. She was tilting her head up now, perhaps they were too close.

"Be careful."

"You told me that already," Mel whispered, unable to look away. "Anything else you'd like to say?"

"Yes," He paused, his eyes took a quick glance to her lips. "But if I say it you'll get mad."

Harry kissed her, Mel responded by pulling him down.

It was hard to tell whether she was euphoric or scared, perhaps both, or perhaps neither. As soon as it happened Harry jumped away, and she was dropped back into reality.

"I can't do it — We haven't talked about  the lifeline — We won't make the right choice if we let our feelings —"

"You're right! Yes!" Mel said, acting just as agitated. "It's a terrible idea — I like you, but—"

"—it's confusing," He said anxiously. "Do you have feelings for me?"

"Do you have feelings for me?" Mel asked in a high-pitched voice.

"No!" He responded, but his voice trembled with a lack of confidence. "I care about you a lot —"

"— I care for you too —"

"— But just —"

"— as friends!"

They stared at each other with the same frightened expression.

"I'm sorry if I made things uncomfortable," He groaned, running a hand through his hair. "I... I don't want to lose you."

"We need to spend some time apart," She nodded, avoiding his eyes. "We can ignore this happened, right?"

"Absolutely," He agreed. "You're spending the summer at the burrow?"

"My mum and my brother will be there, so I kind of have to... is that okay?"

"It's okay," Harry looked around. "We... we should go."

"Did you ever regret falling for my dad?" Mel asked randomly. "I mean, you ever wonder how things would've turned out if you'd stayed as friends?"

Emily stopped folding her clothes.

"Something nagging that head of yours?"

"I think relationships are a waste of time. They all break and you always end up hurting..."

"What makes you think such nonsense?" Emily raised a brow, leaning back on the couch. "Who are you and what did you do to my daughter?"

"You don't think that way?" She asked doubtfully.

"Because I lost my partners that means I have to be bitter?"

"I didn't mean it like that," Mel replied quickly. "But... yeah."

Emily remained silent for a moment, gathering her thoughts.

"Solitude can do weird things to your heart, love. It can pull you towards bad or good places... People that make you feel a little less lonesome, someone who understands you. You should hold onto that for as long as you can, no matter how scary it is. You never know what wonderful things may bring you..."

"Sirius said something similar a year ago," Mel said quietly. "Something about finding my equal, that the earth's full of options and stuff..."

"I won't force you to find a partner if that's not what you want, but you're young and the world is big, you can't turn your back on every opportunity."

"It's not like I have lots of prospects right now..." She huffed.

"You don't need lots, just the right one."

Mel hesitated for a moment, then added:

"I know you used to have a crush on James Potter."

Emily looked up from the laundry again, she raised a brow. "Oh?"

"I know it was a long time ago," She shifted in her place awkwardly. "But do you ever wonder what would've happened if you two..?"

The woman sighed.

"Only once."

"When?"

"When I found out Voldemort was after his son," She folded the last shirt and handed it to Mel. "I asked myself if I had made the right choice by giving him up... When I look at you I know it was the right thing to do. What happened to James and Lily... it was horrible, but it wasn't my fault. I was happy with your father; maybe Matthew wasn't my first love, but when it comes to this, your first love rarely is the one that lasts."

"Mel?" Erick walked into the room. "If we're planning to drive around all day tomorrow, you should sleep," He nodded shortly at both of them and left the room, her mother chuckled.

"You know, Erick reminds me of your father... I know Sirius said he was like his brother, but Regulus made all the wrong choices... Erick's done all this for himself, to be better. Just like Matty."

Mel's gaze lingered on the doorway long after Erick had left.

"Thank you, for letting me go," She sighed, looking back at the woman. "I don't love following Dumbledore's orders but I... I want to make this world a better place."

"Love," Emily cupped her face adoringly. "I know why you're doing this. Just how I knew why you flew that car to save Harry, and why you went to the Ministry... but you're my daughter, and it's my job to worry about you anyway."

Erick and Mel took three changes of clothing and put them in the trunk, Emily gave them muggle money. Mel had a fake driver's license as well as Erick, and they would take turns driving. Harry was nowhere to be seen, but it was expected since it was five in the morning. She hadn't mentioned the kiss to either her mother or Erick, she was determined to keep it that way, much like the whole lifeline stuff and the prophecy.

'Just pile more secrets on top, why don't you,' She thought bitterly as she walked out of the house.

Emily hugged both and let them kiss Reggie goodbye, Mel promised they would see each other soon, and Erick vowed he'd make sure Mel would be safe (she snorted loudly at this). Once inside the car, her friend took a deep breath.

"Ready?"

"This isn't our first adventure, Prince."

"This one's the first we do with permission."

"You're an adult, you don't need anyone's approval."

"You know what I mean," He rolled his eyes.

"Sorry. I get defensive when I'm —"

"I know," He sighed. "I talk too much when I'm worried."

"I know," She put a hand on his shoulder and squeezed lightly. "I'm ready... We'll be okay."

Next Chapter —>

Taglist.

@dee123ksha @vampiregirl1797 @siriuslysirius1107 @stardusthigh @mikariell95 @vernon-dursley @thesuitelifeofafangirl @tomshollandz @wlwmaximoff @reverse-hxlland @hamiltonwc @omiwashere @t-rexs-world @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @21bruhs @i-am-scared-and-useless-bisexual @dielgonacoffee @thelastpyle

[halothenthehorns]

All in the Family

Chapter 99: Number Twelve, Grimmauld Place

The dust hadn't even settled, nor the pain of landing flat on his back, when an ear-piercing, yet almost familiar shriek began in earnest. Regulus felt his heart slam into his throat as he sat up to see what once would have been the most welcoming sight in what felt like a very long time now. Mum was telling off Sirius.

He was just sitting there, gaping up at her, Regulus really would have thought he'd know better than anyone now that was only going to make it worse. Regulus was still fighting back a smile as he got unsteadily to his feet, stumbling towards his mother to distract her away from whatever she was mad about him now to explain, finally, to someone what had been going on! Surely she could help, she could see this future and know, like him, how things needed a change- he slowed though when he really looked into her face, and then fell back to the floor in shock at registering her portrait.

In a slow, almost nightmarish daze, he began turning slowly on the spot to take in the fact that they were home once more...but not exactly as he remembered it. They were in the portrait gallery, the door right off to the side where it should be, but there were several more portraits in here besides mum's that shouldn't be. Dad's was directly across from hers, his aunts and uncles all varying across the walls to draw attention and add to their retribution. The noise all piled up on each other, had him covering his ears, though they weren't doing a good job as badly as they were shaking.

"Shut up, you-" Sirius finally found his voice, but there was barely a hint of air, it was so lost in the mess that when finally the shout of 'Stupefy' rung, it was only the red sparks that gave away something new was happening.

Several more voices took up the spell, and then blessed silence fell.

"Sirius," the voice was gentle, calm now, but Regulus still flinched even as his eyes finally fluttered open, he didn't even remember closing them. Adrenaline was hitting so hard though it wasn't until Lupin had grabbed his brother's arms and was guiding him out of the room, and the troll leg got knocked over on the way up the stairs that it even occurred to him he could move as well.

Peter and Potter were already trying to go after them, but Frank's soft yet startling words stopped them. "Shit kid, are you okay?"

Regulus didn't need to look up to know he was being spoken to. He swallowed several times and didn't have an answer. He wasn't even sure how he did it, but he got to his feet and took off up the stairs as well, racing past so fast he wouldn't have seen Fluffy standing in his way until he made it to the very top floor. Only mum and dad's room stood on his left, but that wasn't his goal. He tapped the wall impatiently with his wand, but the stairs to the attic didn't descend as they should have. He was trapped.

He'd never felt trapped in his own home before, was this how Sirius always felt? Surrounded by those portraits, nothing but an echo of his parents, he'd swear the walls were closing in on him and he'd tried running to his favorite spot where nobody but Kreacher ever found him. He could hide up there for days until Mum and Dads fights subsided, just because he was used to them yelling at Sirius, or each other, or anything on their mind at all hours didn't always mean he wanted to be here listening to it. At least during Mum and Dad's lessons they spoke with calm dignity, he'd happily listened to them talk like that for days.

He heard soft footsteps behind him and cringed at the idea of Sirius following just to keep yelling at him and tell him to grow up.

James watched as Peter took off after Regulus without hesitation. Regulus, he knew that for a fact, not Sirius. The only reason Remus had beat him to get Sirius out of here had been because James had been watching everyone to make sure those portraits weren't going to jump clean out and slit their throats, they were that kind of horrifying.

Now he simply stood there and watched the empty staircase. To go after any of them would just feel redundant at this point. He hadn't exactly missed it was Remus Sirius kept turning to ever since that fight had been mended, and it's not like he had to dig deep to see why. James had been the one to insist Sirius keep his distance until Remus made his decision, and he had been the one to tell Peter the same thing. Now it seems they'd collectively decided to do the same to him, but he had no clue what he was being punished for.

"Come on girls, let's find somewhere else to read this, I don't know how long those portraits are going to stay frozen," Longbottom walked cautiously past him, even as dark as their surroundings were he couldn't have missed the uneasy look given his way as he put his first foot on the stairs James hadn't touched. Evans was even doing the same thing as she followed him on the same step. He didn't care why.

She was the one to crack open the book and read in a soft whisper where he knew them to be though, and Frank was practically reading over her shoulder, almost quivering with anticipation to hear about all of this. James  hardly took in a word of Harry's arrival, his eyes zeroing in on Alice Smith. She was trailing a couple of steps behind the two, stumbled slightly, and reached out on instinct to grab the banister before pulling her hand back away with a look of fear that she quickly tried to correct.

He made a snap decision as he finally put his own cautious foot on the first step and called back, "hey, Alice, can I talk to you?"

She stopped and turned to him at once, an understandably confused look on her face. The other two were so engrossed with Harry seeing all this in only slightly better light than they were, that they were several more stairs up before his words sank in and they turned back as well. "Just Alice," he added pointedly.

Alice was already descending the stairs, but now she stopped beside him with an even more confused, but at least friendly enough smile in place before she too turned. "It's alright, I don't think he's going to feed me to the other half of that troll," she gestured vaguely over her shoulder at the crude umbrella stand.

Frank gave an uneasy laugh, but nodded and started up once more. Evans's eyes were the brightest green he'd ever seen, they stuck out even here in this dark place, and she tried to take a step backwards before stumbling and not trying further. He waited until the book resumed though before asking plainly, "well, I told you I wouldn't be shy when I wanted your opinion."

She watched as he stopped there and crossed his arms, like he thought that was all the explanation needed. It wasn't for her. "My opinion on, what exactly?"

"I know you've been talking to my friends," he said like she was daft, and she frowned at the tone. "I want to know what about."

She smoothed down her hair as she realized it from his point of view for the first time, but it really hadn't been like that at all. Her chat with Remus had been brief and cordial in that sea of tents, and she'd talked more at Black than to him, and it had been very involuntary given the circumstances of that maze. He didn't seem to have taken in a word regardless. The only one she had sought out was Peter at the museum, and she wasn't just going to repeat all that. She chose her words carefully, "well, I'd say, you lot need to be talking to each other."

"Wow, thanks, I never thought about that," he rolled his eyes and tapped his foot, getting downright belligerent. "Anything more vague? Should we start with hello to each other?"

"I, decided to stay out of it," she admitted, or at least, she'd been trying to not butt in where she wasn't wanted, Sirius had asked her something rather similar after all, so she'd tell Potter the same thing. "I want to help, I just think you should try looking at it from their point of view. Ask them what they think more."

He just looked at her. It took a few moments for Alice to realize he was waiting for the rest. She merely shrugged though, she had nothing else to offer that hadn't been said in confidence.

Sirius may have followed along blindly as Remus guided him away, but he still knew exactly where they were, even if Remus himself didn't, when he stepped off the stairs onto the floor that housed some guest rooms. Sirius tried the door first, but when it didn't open, Sirius didn't care and pressed Remus up against it regardless, kissing him fiercely.

"Here?" Remus gasped, trying to jerk himself away. "Sirius, this is not why I-"

"Shh," Sirius giggled in his ear, still feeling more giddy than he had even after their first prank. "James is probably still trying to talk to Evans about whatever, and Peter's lost his mind, nobody's going to notice."

"That's still not what I-" Remus meant to protest, he even grabbed his hips to at least keep him at arm's length, but Sirius leaned in again and damn if Remus wasn't the most easily distracted person on the planet as his eyes began to roll into the back of his head, his hands betraying him and pulling Sirius closer instead until there was a clatter on the stairs and they sprung guiltily apart.

Someone certainly went rushing past in a hurry, but it was too dark to tell, and they stayed uneasily where they were pretending they weren't breathing heavily when moments later another more hurried footsteps followed.

Remus rubbed at his forehead, self-guilt and even more self-anger reminding himself to take a step even farther back before Sirius could distract him again.

"Padfoot, I mean it, I want to talk. Merlin, have you actually talked to anyone since..." his voice died when Evans began reading, and the answer sunk into him regardless. Sirius hadn't talked in almost a month now, and it hadn't started with Peter, he'd refused to talk to Remus the night he'd told Snape where to find him that full moon. Maybe even longer before that. Oh sure, he'd opened his mouth, words had come out, but there had been a distance in him that Remus was genuinely starting to worry about, and the look on his face as he'd looked upon his mother's portrait was the best chance he'd had to start that conversation in all this mess. He was half surprised James wasn't up here as well by now to double team him, that would have been sure to work.

The two of them flinched and jumped even farther apart when they realized someone was certainly venting their feelings around here, and it was Harry, at his friends. James's son was certainly holding nothing back.

The two listened in avid silence to the whole thing until the twins interrupted, and Remus only felt his worry grow. If Sirius kept whatever it was bottled up, well, he was a lot more boisterous than Harry. When he exploded, there was a good chance it would involve more than shouting.

"Sirius," he tried again, but Sirius seemed determined to brush him off, again.

"I did it Remus, did you see! Well, maybe not as well as that," he acknowledged his future self storming up the stairs to tell off those portraits in even more style than he and James had managed. "I've never told her to shut it before though! I bet I really can next time I see her."

"That's, great Sirius," Remus said in exasperation, but was stopped from saying anything else as they were tugged away once more.

[hpdabbles]

Sweet Slytherin

Here is a part 3 of Baker Regulus as a thank you for the ko-fi! I’m dubbing the Baker Regulus series as “Sweet Slytherin” to help me keep organized hope that’s okay!

Regulus left the kitchens with a new batch of brownies he had been experimenting with. He had tried layered brownies before but they never came out as even as perfect as the ones he made today. 

He made the layers out of fudge, while each one had a different design and topping. He didn’t want a single one to look alike and it ate away most of his stress as he careful crafted, square after square. Some were drizzled with caramel, others had peanuts on top, a few had shredded coco, some with walnuts and anything in between. 

Regulus was hoping the choice of various flavors would go well at the last Slug Club meeting of the year. He had been nervous about it ever since he learn that the end of the year meeting was the most important one because it was turned into a ball for no reason other then Slughorn could. 

The ball was formal of course and the last chance seven years had to secure a well relationship with most of the important people in the field they like to go into. Regulus himself wasn’t really sure what he wanted after Hogwarts, since nothing about him really stood out compare to the upper years, yes he was smart for his age but so was everyone invited, yes he comes from a well off family with high social standing, but so did most of everyone else too.

The only thing Regulus felt he had to his name was his baking and even that was so and so because he has yet gotten the other houses to try his creations.

But maybe this time, with his special brownies-

“Well, well, well. If it isn’t Slytherin’s little prince.” A voice taunts as Regulus jumps, not expecting anyone to be about this late. He twist around and out of the shadows emerges Sirius’ friends. James Potter, Remus Lupin and Peter Pettigrew.  

Regulus couldn’t see his brother anywhere but he doubts Sirius is far behind. The four never went anywhere without the others, having earn the nickname marauders long before Regulus step foot in Hogwarts.

 He had seen them from afar and no matter how many times he tried to speak to Sirius after that dreadful fight at the beginning of the year the Gryffindor refused to listen.

“Oh..um hello..” Regulus mutters clenching the tray he had his brownies. He held the tray like a makeshift shield as the three third-years surrounded him, not sure if he needed the shield or not. 

“What’s a little first year doing out so late? Curfew started thirty minutes ago. ” Potter grins taking a step closer, while throwing his hands into his pockets. His face loomed a awful close to Regulus, who stared up at him confused. “Are you lost?”

“Oh no. I was just...finishing my brownies. I didn’t realize the time...I’ll go back to my dorm-”

“Brownies?” Lupin’s voice is soft but it hold a strange tint of doubt. “You made brownies?”

Regulus relaxes a little beaming in pride as he holds up his tray.  “Yes specials brownies.”

“Oh.” Lupin says eyes wide. “You made...special brownies. Aren’t you eleven?”

Regulus isn’t sure what his age has to do with anything but he’s always found Lupin a bit strange. Must be a werewolf thing. He nods and the three Gryffindors pull back a bit. They have a entire conversation with just their eyes, making small noises in the back of their throats, while the Slytherin watches on. It rather fascinating to see actually, if a little confusing.

Finally Pettigrew steps forward hand outstretched. “We’ll be taking those special brownies ”

Regulus blinks.  “They’re for the Slug Club Meeting tomorrow night. I can’t give them to you.”

Potter grin turns lightly mean and Regulus knows something is not quite right. That’s the same time of grin Bellatrix has at family reunions when she is about to do something cruel. The older boy crowds Regulus up against a wall, one of the boy’s arm trapping there.  “We weren’t asking.”

“Well...yes you weren’t. You were more demanding.” Regulus corrects. “It’s a bit different in the tone of voice. When one asks, one’s voice tends to dip.”

The older boy pauses surprise. Regulus sees his chance and ducks under the arm the Gryffindor has, running away before the other two could so much as draw their wands. He hears a shout of outrage, and then stomping feet, and Regulus’ heart squeezes in terror. 

He rounds the corner just as a spell slams into his shoulder. His shoe laces tie themselves together causing Regulus to trip. His chin bangs against the floor, and his tray goes flying. There is a dull pain in his needs, chin and palms where he tried to catch himself but when he looks up nothing hurts more then seeing the pastries he worked so hard to create smeared on the ground.

He’ll have to start over tomorrow but he wasn’t sure if he would have the free time, as he had classes as well. 

Regulus silver eyes start to water up as the three older boys finally catch up to him. He pushes himself up, tears slipping down his face as Potter walks over to the crumbled brownies.  He looks oddly remorseful, when he glances at the sniffing first year. 

“This wasn’t supposed-”

“What do you three think you are doing?” A familiar voice harsh with rage has everyone turning to where Sirius is stomping his way to them.

“Sirius. This isn’t what it looks like” Lupin franticly denies “We were just trying to stop him from going down a worse path.”

“A worse path!? You three threw him on the ground!”

“I didn’t mean for him to fall! Honest Sirius!” Pettigrew yelps.  “I meant to freeze his shoes but you know I’m pants at charms and messed it up somehow.”

Regulus quickly cast the counter spell for his shoes, backing away on all fours as the Marauders start to bicker among themselves not wanting any of them to see him sob. He makes a mad dash for his dorm, mindful of any sound behind him but thankful it seems the Gryffindors stayed behind, most likely not see him make his get away.

Once he reaches the Slytherin common room, he blurts out the password, and a group of people all jump to their feet.

Nott is the first one to speak  “Black! You’re back what did you make us-what’s wrong?”

Regulus looks through his tears at the third year who looks worried and finds himself pressing his wet face into the startled teenager’s chest, sobbing until his whole body shook. Nott, quickly wrapped his arms around him, patting his back and mumbling comfort nothings as the rest of the Slytherins who had grown used to waiting long hours for the sweets Regulus brought back began to mumble to each other. 

“Regulus?” Nott whispered. “What’s wrong? What happened?”

Regulus shakes his head and the older male doesn’t push after that, just letting him cry on him in the middle of the Slytherin common room. Later he feels horrified everyone saw that weak side of him, terrified they will use it against him but surprisingly his house reacts differently

They have never been as protective of Regulus as they were after that and even though the Marauders tried to apologize at the entrance of the Slug Club Ball, having test his brownies and realized they weren’t the special type they thought they were- whatever that meant- but Regulus has no heart to listen.

He is dressed in his finest outfit, the clothes he knows makes him look good, with a chocolate cake that while amazing not as decoratively dazzling as his brownies would have been, he walks right by the group of four for once not seeking Sirius’ eyes.

Starting today, after seeing that Regulus had the whole Slytherin house to defend him and maybe it was high time he stop trying to befriend the other houses. Maybe he could only bake for the snakes.

[queerofthedagger]

hello! i noticed you have prompts open, and i love your writing! no pressure ofc but do you think you could write james and sirius rescuing regulus? maybe getting him out of grimmauld, or maybe when they're all older, getting him away from the death eaters?? james and sirius CAN be in a relationship, or they could be just uselessly giving each other heart eyes until reggie does something to facilitate their boyfriendhood?? i don't know, the ball is in your court, now :')

Hey nonnie, thank you so much for the prompt! ❤️ It really took me a while, but on the bright side, it also got quite long (most of it is under the cut.) I hope it’s more or less what you were aiming for - it got angst-y, but there’s a happy ending.

The first part of this was also written for a writing exercise on discord, “Have your character write a letter to their younger self.” All of the fic was heavily inspired by this video, and by the song used in it, which also provided me with the title.

or maybe you were the ocean (when I was just a stone)

Teen and Up || Graphic Depictions of Violence || 5,7k words || AO3

Pairings: Sirius Black/James Potter; Sirius Black & Regulus Black

Tags: Regulus Black Lives; Fix It; Established Relationship; Angst with a Happy Ending

Summary: There are only two ways this can end, and James refuses both of them. Refuses to accept that they will die here, like this, joining the hundreds of dead bodies in their eternal grave; refuses to be the one who has to drag Sirius out of here, to tell him that he’s failed in the last second. To watch him shatter underneath the weight of his grief. ---  Kreacher does not like Master Regulus' plan. Kreacher has his orders about them, but they don't include a piece of parchment, meant to join Regulus the following day. Kreacher thinks there's only one person able to help, loath as he is to admit it.

Kreacher's right.

*

Dear “younger self,”

I would never write this if I wasn’t going to die tomorrow, but there is a strange urge to acknowledge everything in a place outside my own head, and this seems the easiest way. At least it is a dying wish easily fulfilled.

That is a horrible way to start a letter. I suppose it is of no consequence though, seeing that these words will disappear with me.

If I could give you only one piece of advice, it would be this; listen to Sirius. Listen to Sirius and go with him when he leaves – do anything, anything at all to get away from this house that has never been a home to either of you.

I know what you’re thinking; he abandoned you first. He is the one who replaced you. He made everything so much harder on himself with his stubbornness, his constant need to be contrary; by always stepping into the line of mother’s fury.

But he is also right, about so many things.

Most importantly though, he is right about this – no matter what you do, it will never be enough to make them proud. Not getting sorted into Slytherin, not upholding traditions and echoing their beliefs and, most of all, not joining the Dark Lord. Nothing will ever be enough.

You will only burn yourself up by trying; you will do everything that is expected of you and more, and it won’t be enough. You will do unspeakable things that leave you shaking for days on end, will wake you up every night with screams lodged behind your teeth and fear buried in your bones.

Will leave you aged decades within a year, and still mother will only stare at you blankly and ask where Sirius is.

You won’t know either, but you’ll wish you did. You will wish that you could find him, warn him, beg him for help. But not only will you have aged decades, you will have drifted away so far that there’s no way to go back anymore.

Not a point in trying either.

You may think that I’m dramatizing in typical Black manner, but to be honest, it’s still so much worse than it sounds.

Tomorrow, I will die in a cave, and nobody will know. Tomorrow, I will die in a cave, and all I’ll be remembered as is a spineless coward who has been wrong all along.

At least I won’t have to deal with Sirius’ ‘I told you so.’

I’d take a hundred of those if only to see that grin one more time.

There always is a choice, and there always are consequences. Sometimes, they just come for you as an army of Inferi and the Drink of Despair.

-          Regulus

* * *

Regulus doesn't know that Kreacher slips the letter out of his pocket later that night; doesn’t know that his always loyal elf is still searching for his least favourite family member when Regulus leaves for the last time, in the early hours of dawn.

Anything, anything at all to save Master Regulus.

* * *

James hears the crashes and the shouting already on the staircase, Sirius’ voice unmistakable. He breaks into a run, taking the steps two, three at a time, wand drawn and ready to fight whoever has found them.

An old, wrinkled house-elf is not what he expects to find sneering up at Sirius, and it effectively stops him in his tracks. Sirius doesn’t seem to notice him though, glaring down at the creature with so much hatred written over his face that James doesn’t dare let his guard down just yet.

“I’m not going to promise you anything without knowing what you want from me,” Sirius just spits, contempt dripping from his every word. His hands are shaking at his sides though, muscle in his jaw jumping, and James knows that this isn’t a usual threat.

Knows that there’s something personal in this because Sirius’ anger only ever burns bright and hot like this when he’s terrified; when there’s something on the line beyond his own life.

Sirius only ever loses control when it comes to his loved ones, and just like that, James knows whose elf this is; knows with startling certainty spreading through his lungs that this has the potential to break Sirius, and inevitably himself.

Neither of them has noticed him yet, or at least not considered him noteworthy enough to avert their glares from each other, and James takes a second to take in the details.

The living room looks wrecked, books and papers littering the floor and the coffee table lying overturned. Sirius has a cut on his cheek, slowly oozing blood while the elf appears to be unharmed. It’s clenching a crumpled piece of parchment in one gnarled fist though, and underneath the disdain spilling from its eyes, James can make out a deep wariness.

“Sirius,” he says, taking a few steps into the room without lowering his wand. “I don’t think he’d be here if it wasn’t important.”

Because there’s only one reason James can come up with for the elf of the Blacks to appear in their home; only one reason, and he knows that Sirius knows it too, sees it in the thin line of his lips and the tightness of his shoulders.

“It could still be a trick,” Sirius presses out, not taking his eyes off the elf, and there’s a plea ringing in his words, desperation for it to not be what they both fear it is.

“Kreacher would not expose himself to the presence of filthy blood-traitors for – “

“Shut up!” Sirius snaps, eyes flashing, and James quickly wraps his fingers around his wrist. Looks at him and silently says, not now, not yet, it’s not worth it.

“What are the terms?” he asks out loud, glancing at the elf whose face twists as if contemplating if James is even worth answering to.

He seems to decide that it’ll have higher chances than with Sirius, though he turns his nose up when he speaks. “Kreacher has a message that was not intended to reach the – you. Kreacher will deliver it still, if the blood-traitor son promises to help.”

And yeah, that would be a problem, James thinks. Looks at Sirius and sees the conflict there, twitching fingers and working jaw, and thinks to hell with it.

“You were not ordered to not deliver it either, then?” he asks, because he might be reckless, but he’s not stupid; might be willing to risk everything and anything for Sirius every second of the day, but never once Sirius himself.

The elf’s sneer slips by a fraction. “Kreacher received no orders at all about the letter. Kreacher does want to add that time is an issue. He will be needing help soon.”

Sirius still doesn’t look convinced, but James knows what will happen if they refuse; knows that Sirius will run himself in circles, will drive himself mad with not knowing. Knows that it might be the deciding push to finally plunge them off the precipice this war has them balancing on.

Thinks that if it’s as bad as he thinks it is, refusing might end up being worse than whatever potential trap they’re about to walk into.

His grip on Sirius’ wrist tightens, but he doesn’t glance away from the elf when he says, “We accept. Give us the letter, and we’ll help.”

Sirius makes a strangled noise in the back of his throat but he’s also already gripping for the parchment, nearly tearing it in his haste.

James is barely able to take in the words with the way Sirius is shaking beside him, and still, all he can think is that it’s so, so much worse than he could’ve ever anticipated.

“Where,” Sirius finally chokes out, his face pale and haunted, and he’s swaying on his feet, knuckles white around his wand. “Where,” he repeats, voice breaking over the shout.

James does the only thing he can do; takes Sirius’ face between his hands and digs his fingers into his skin. Presses their foreheads together and says, “No, not like this.” Holds on even as Sirius struggles, eyes wild and caught so firmly between anger and desperation that it makes James’ heart ache. “You’ll kill us both like this,” he says, shaking him for good measure. Says, “Breathe,” again and again until Sirius finally starts listening, or at least accepting that it’s the only way James will let him out of this flat anytime soon.

“Better,” he finally allows, but he only lets his hand drop to Sirius’ wrist once more as he turns back to the elf.

There’s disdain again, but also poorly hidden relief, and James could honestly not care less about what a house-elf thinks of them right now.

“When is he planning to go?” Sirius asks, and his voice is still strained, full of fear buried underneath fury, but at least he’s thinking again.

Of course, it all flies out of the window when Kreacher answers, “He left an hour ago. Kreacher can take you to the entrance of the cave but not further.”

James doesn’t protest when Sirius snarls, “Take us,” doesn’t think that Kreacher would be willing to give them more information even if he’d get Sirius to listen for another second.

The words Inferi and Drink of Despair are still echoing through his head, and they’re mixing with the guilt that is already radiating off of Sirius in waves, mixing with it’s my fault, and I should’ve tried harder, and if he dies, it’s because of me, that he knows are running rampage in Sirius’ own head.

As they’re pulled into the Apparation, James silently lists defences against Inferi and poison, hoping that they’re the only things he will have to fight tonight.

The sounds hit him first; desperate, guttural sobs that seem to echo, magnified and thrown around between what turn out to be the smooth, dark walls of a large cave. There are pleas in between, broken off words and swallowed fractures, though through the seconds it takes them to orientate themselves, two words are repeated over and over.

Sirius, please.

The words twist themselves underneath James’ ribs, race down his spine, and still he is glad for them. They freeze Sirius in place just long enough for James to reach out and hold him back from storming straight into the water stretching out between them and the small island Regulus seems to be kneeling on.

A green glow coming from a basin spends just enough eerie light to illuminate Regulus’ trembling figure, curled in on himself and pleading, crying, screaming himself hoarse.

It’s only Kreacher’s voice that prevents James from having to outright fight Sirius to keep him where he is.

“There’s a boat,” he says. “It will only take one of you.”

“Can’t you take us?” James asks before Sirius can, one arm still tightly wrapped around his chest as his own stomach sinks, panic clawing its way slowly up his throat.

Kreacher’s jaw sets and he shakes his head. “The wards would be tripped, and Master Regulus forbade me from doing anything to alert him.”

There’s no way, no way in hell that James will let Sirius go alone, or leave him behind, and he spares a thought to curse whoever set up this nightmare of a setting. He has some suspicions but no time to really bother with them, Sirius already struggling again, glaring and spitting and snarling at James as if he’s seriously contemplating to hex him within the next few seconds.

He needs an answer, a solution, anything, but there’s nothing, and then there’s movement from the small island, the sudden sound of waves drawing their attention.

It shouldn’t be loud enough, shouldn’t drown out Regulus’ cries and Sirius’ curses, but still they both stop moving, eyes forcibly dragged to witness Regulus bowing low over the edge of the lake.

Grey hands are breaking the surface of the water, followed by heads and bodies, so many of them that they appear to be moving as one. The green light reflects on the dead skin, catching on empty eyes and white teeth, and James has to clench his jaw against the bile rising in his throat.

“Take us,” Sirius says, and his voice is cold all of a sudden, tightly controlled fury pressed into two words as he stares at Kreacher.

“Kreacher cannot – “

“Take. Us,” Sirius repeats, drawing himself up. “I command you to take us, or I swear by all that I hold dear, my mother will look like a bloody joke when I’m done with you.”

Kreacher’s still hesitating, visibly struggling with himself in a way that would give James a pause in different circumstances, but they’re losing time they can’t afford.

Regulus’ screams have turned hoarse, barely audible over the other noises filling up the cavern now, and it’s impossible to spot him any longer in between the throng of Inferi.

“You want him to survive as well, don’t you?” James tries, and there’s terror ringing through his words.

Finally, Kreacher nods, and they don’t get another second to prepare themselves for the lurch of Apparation; to question just who they’re alerting by tripping the wards.

Sirius twists out of his grip the second they have solid ground under their feet again, wand slashing through the air in ferocious precision. Still, for every cutting curse that hits its target, three more seem to appear, and the whole bulk of them is already moving back into the murky water.

“Fire,” James snaps, unceremoniously digging his elbow into Sirius’ side when he doesn’t seem to hear him. “Fire, but not directly at them, come on.”

An incantation rolls off Sirius’ tongue that James has only ever read about and his blood runs cold. His own movement slows and stops as he watches white-hot flames burst forward, rushing over the surface of the lake surrounding them, forming indistinct shapes.

“Sirius,” he tries, grabbing his arm. “Sirius,” he shouts, shaking him, but to no avail. There are no Inferi left in the vicinity of the island. No other bodies either but for Kreacher cowering by the basin, and James knows, knows that Sirius has noticed too. That he’ll burn the whole cave down, no matter how little it will serve an actual purpose, and himself with it if James lets him.

The light of the flames is breaking on Sirius’ face, all hard lines and pain etched into every crease as his eyes seem to burn, grey blazing just as bright.

There are only two ways this can end, and James refuses both of them. Refuses to accept that they will die here, like this, joining the hundreds of dead bodies in their eternal grave; refuses to be the one who has to drag Sirius out of here, to tell him that he’s failed in the last second. To watch him shatter underneath the weight of his grief.

It’s not a plan. It’s not even something he expects to work or to not go horribly wrong, but it’s the only thing he can think off beyond forcing Sirius to give up for his sake.

The Summoning Spell shouldn’t work on people, and the seconds after he casts tick by so very slowly. The heat keeps scorching his skin, licking at his hands and his face and supplying a painfully tangible warning of Sirius’ suffering.

Then there’s a ripple in the water close to them, a body hurling out of it and barrelling into James with a force that knocks him off his feet. Sharp stones are digging into his back, his head is thundering with the strength of the impact but he’s laughing, laughing and crying and only just making sure that it’s Regulus lying on top of him, unconscious but with breath brushing against James’ neck.

Somehow, he manages to climb back to his feet, pulling Regulus up as he goes. Manages to stumble through the thick smoke that’s curling through the air, through his lungs, threatening to choke them all before they can burn or drown.

A distant, hysterical corner of his mind that he tries to ignore as best as he can helpfully points out that it at least keeps out whoever created this cavern from hell, and he wants to laugh again.

Finally, he reaches Sirius, standing rigid at the very edge of the water with tears streaming down his face but wand still raised, staring straight into the flames. James wraps his free hand around his neck, pressing his nails into his skin and shaking him until Sirius finally turns his head to look at him.

It takes several seconds until the haze leaves Sirius’ eyes and they widen, realization bleeding into them, swiftly followed by guilt. James wants to feel relief, wants to reassure him that there’s nothing to be guilty about; wants to shove Regulus at him and shout, see, everything will be fine, you idiot. As if I’d ever let you down.

He’s not sure yet that he believes it himself though and does none of those things. Does only tighten his grip on both brothers and shouts for Kreacher, the words scraping against his raw throat, and he nearly slumps in relief when the elf appears next to them with wide, terrified eyes.

“Take us to our flat,” he orders, praying and begging silently that he will listen. The fire is breaking through the barrier Sirius must’ve kept up, heat already singing their clothes, and he thinks he can hear a shriek of rage even over the roaring of the flames.

The sight of Regulus must’ve convinced Kreacher because he doesn’t waste a second to grab the limp hand, and then the world is twisting, lurching, and the last thing James sees is white and red and yellow, and a person materializing out of black smoke in the spot they’re just leaving behind.

Regulus’ weight drags James down as soon as they land, and he pulls Sirius with him. The quiet and cold of their living room is like a punch, adrenaline snatched away with the sudden absence of heat.

For long moments, he’s unable to move, to do anything but breathe. Unable to comprehend that they made it out, all three of them still alive and here, maybe not unharmed but not on the bottom of a lake full of Inferi either.

“Is he - ?” Sirius breaks the silence, and when James turns his head to look at him, his eyes are clenched shut, hands still trembling where they press against the floor, and lips white with the force his teeth are biting into them.

“He’s breathing,” he answers quietly because he has no idea if Regulus is fine, will be fine again, and he can’t lie to Sirius, never could, not even about something like this.

Sirius gives a jerky nod, still not opening his eyes but reaching out a hand to wrap around James’ own so tightly that he can feel his bones shift. “I could’ve killed you. I could’ve killed you and you didn’t stop me.”

It’s not an accusation, not even a reprimand. It’s only horror, and guilt, and James wants to erase the previous hours from all of their minds. Wants to take all three of them far away from a family that pitches brothers against each other, from a war that’s eating away at all of them, and from whatever it is that led Regulus to the cave and his near self-sacrifice in the first place.

Wants to take them far away and forget about the terror that’s still woven tightly around his ribs, pressing into his lungs and choking up his throat with a grip so crushing, he’s not sure if it’ll ever leave again.

“As if I’d let you,” he finally chokes out, squeezing Sirius’ hand in return and pulling them both into a sitting position.

It falls flat and they both know it, but Sirius merely gives another nod and scrambles until he’s kneeling at Regulus’ side, hands shaking as they hover helplessly over his still body.

James wants to take them far away from here, or scream and rage until the memories don’t feel so achingly raw anymore, and does none of it. Instead, he pulls himself together with more effort than it’s ever taken him and knocks his head softly against Sirius’ in wordless reassurance.

Taking a deep breath, he starts pulling away Regulus’ torn robes. “Kreacher, could you get me the potions from the bathroom?” he asks when he finds deep gashes underneath the fabric, littering his arms and chest, bleeding into their faded blue carpet.

The elf disappears, the crack of his Apparition startling Sirius out of his shock. The following minutes pass in silence, both of them working on closing the wounds, dispelling the water from Regulus’ lungs, and checking for invisible injuries.

After Kreacher reappears with the potions, he watches them closely but otherwise stays silent and keeps his distance, hands wrung tight into the hem of the pillowcase he’s wearing.

“That’s it,” James finally says, sitting back on his haunches and rubbing a hand over his face in exhaustion. “Some of it will scar, but he should wake up soon.”

At least he hopes so; neither of them is a Healer even if they’d inevitably picked up the basics since leaving Hogwarts. He doesn’t want to consider what would happen if he doesn’t.

Sirius doesn’t answer, merely sits back to lean against the back of the couch and carefully moving Regulus until his head is resting in Sirius’ lap.

For long moments, James only watches the slow movements of Sirius’ hand carding through Regulus’ hair, the way his eyes keep roaming over his body as if expecting new injuries to appear. Watches how two of his fingers stay pressed against Regulus’ pulse point at his throat, hand twitching every other second.

Eventually though, James forces himself back to his feet, legs trembling underneath him as he makes his way into the kitchen. His throat is parched, his eyes are still burning from the smoke, and he knows that Sirius must be in a similar state; knows that he won’t get up and take care of himself until Regulus opens his eyes because it’s what he’d do if it was James lying there.

It’s what James would do if the roles were reversed, and that’s a scenario he shoves away as best as he can whenever the thought so much as tries to form.

When he steps back into the room with two glasses of water and PepperUp Potion, Sirius is still in the same position, but he’s talking quietly, words barely audible. “Come on, lionheart, you have to wake up. I owe you several I told you so’s, remember?” he’s just saying, voice rough and still so, so heavy with regrets.

“Sir-us?”

James freezes where he’s just sitting down next to them, nearly forgetting to keep up the levitation spell, and watches with fear and relief warring in his chest as Regulus’ eyelids flutter, eyes slowly blinking open to reveal a grey several shades darker than Sirius’.

“You idiot,” is the first thing Sirius chokes out, his grip on Regulus’ shoulder visibly tightening, and in spite of everything, James smiles faintly. “You complete, utter idiot, how could you?”

Regulus’ eyes widen, his body going rigid while his hands curl into fists at his sides. “What – where – “

“You nearly died,” Sirius spits before James can even think about answering, and he winces at the note of anger creeping back into Sirius’ tone. “What were you thinking? If Kreacher hadn’t – “

“Kreacher came to you?” Regulus interrupts, surprisingly alert all of a sudden as he sits up, and James wonders if it’s only adrenaline that’s fuelling him. He twists so he can keep looking at them, pushing himself onto his knees, and his eyes flicker between them as fear and disbelief chase each other over his expression. “I – you – you got me out of the cave?”

Before Sirius can answer, James reaches out to squeeze his knee.

Sirius swallows, eyes closing briefly, but his voice is much calmer when he says, “Yes, though if it wasn’t for James, I doubt – we only arrived when you – when the Inferi attacked you.”

Regulus’ expression doesn’t change, confusion and wariness still shining in his eyes. “But how – I forbade Kreacher from telling anyone and anyway, why? Why would you – “

Care is what he doesn’t say, what he doesn’t have to say if the flinch from Sirius is anything to go by.

James watches out of the corner of his eye as Sirius’ jaw clenches and unclenches, fingers tapping a restless rhythm against his legs, and he eventually draws his shoulders back.

“Because you’re my brother. And I – even though I never regretted leaving Grimmauld’s, I regretted leaving you behind. That we grew apart so badly and I – that you thought you couldn’t come to me with whatever insane thing you were attempting tonight. Because the thought of you dying – I couldn’t – I’d never let that happen,” Sirius finally says, his voice quiet but gaze boring into Regulus’.

Regulus stares with wide eyes, a frown etched between his brows as if he isn’t quite sure that any of this is real. “But you’re – I’m everything you hate,” he finally spits, face twisting into a snarl while his hands tremble at his sides. “I joined the Dark Lord! I did things so horrible, you wouldn’t – “ he chokes off, turning his head away.

James thinks it’s startling how similar the two of them are, after all, despite everything. He’s itching to make this easier for both of them, but all he can do is press his leg against Sirius’ and hope that it’ll be enough to get through this.

“And you realised what a shit-choice that was,” Sirius shoots back, and for the briefest of seconds, his lips twitch into a smile. “I told you so, by the way.”

Regulus’ head whips back around, and James wants to bury his face in his hands.

“The letter,” Regulus whispers, his whole posture slumping. “Of course. I should’ve – “

“If you finish that sentence, I’ll kill you myself,” Sirius growls, then shakes his head and huffs. “I just – are you really so keen to die that you wouldn’t even consider asking me for help?”

There’s desperation bleeding through his words now, and Regulus must’ve heard it too because his head snaps up, his hand twitching as if he wants to reach out.

“It’s not – no,” he presses out, running a hand over his face. “But I – not only didn’t I expect you to believe me, it’s also dangerous. More dangerous than this war already is, and you have a traitor in your precious Order and I couldn’t – he’ll hunt me down anyway.“

“You betrayed Voldemort,” James says before Sirius can, the final pieces clicking into place, and it reminds him of the flash of white skin materialising just as they’d left the cave behind.

Regulus flinches at the name and seems to hesitate. Eventually, he nods, resolve hardening his features. “He’s mad, completely, utterly mental. I just – I couldn’t do it anymore and when Kreacher – when I found out something important, something that could help bring him down, I – “ he pauses, biting his lips. Takes a deep breath and closes his eyes before looking back at Sirius. “I thought I could at least do one good thing. What does it matter if I die in a raid, in a cave, or because he decides to kill me?”

“Because I couldn’t bear to lose you!” Sirius snaps. “Because it was already bad enough to lose you once, and I won’t let Voldemort, or anyone else for that matter, lay a fucking hand on you, alright? And you’ll better get used to that, you complete idiot, because I won’t make the same mistake twice.”

There’s a beat of silence in which the words seem to ring through the room, and then a dry sob wrenches itself out of Regulus’ throat, his hand flying up to press against his mouth.

Sirius instantly moves forward, wrapping his arms around Regulus and burying his head in the crook of his neck, his own shoulders shaking. It takes only a second until Regulus’ arms come up, his hands clenching in the fabric of Sirius’ hoodie as if holding on for dear life.

James watches, something loosening in his chest, and when he looks at Kreacher for the first time since Regulus woke up, there’s barely any disdain left on his old face.

The two of them stay in their embrace for a long time, murmuring to each other so quietly that James can’t make out the words.

As much as he wants to give them their time, to leave them to make up for all those lost years, there’s still a memory at the forefront of his mind that is impossible to ignore. He doesn’t want to think about it, wants to think about nothing but all three of them being alive and well, but if he truly wants to keep it that way, they still have more important things to worry about first.

Clearing his throat and flashing them a strained, apologetic smile, he waits until he has both of their attention. “I’m not sure that we weren’t seen just before we disappeared.”

All the blood drains from Regulus’ face and he flinches back as if he’s been slapped. His hand finds Sirius’ arm, fingers twisting into his sleeve, and James’ heart aches at having to do this at all.

Sirius’ features only harden, jaw setting and lips pressing into a thin line.

James knows what he’s going to say and shakes his head. “We have to leave,” he says, raising his hand to stall Sirius’ protest. “We could go into hiding, but Regulus is right. We have a traitor in the Order, and whatever it is Regulus attempted to do tonight, you and I both know that it was too well-guarded to draw anything but Voldemort’s utmost attention.”

“A Horcrux,” Regulus says quietly, turning his head to send Sirius a look full of meaning that’s lost on James. “Did you take a locket, by any chance?”

“A Horcrux,” Sirius echoes, his voice suddenly hoarse again, and he slowly shakes his head. “We didn’t but I – well I guess it got probably caught up in the Fiendfyre.”

“You – “ Regulus starts, then cuts himself off and shakes his head. “Never mind. James is right though, we can’t stay here. We have to – I need to, I’m – “ he stammers, hands starting to shake and fear filling his eyes.

Sirius’ eyes meet James’, and he finds the same resolve that he’s feeling mirrored back at him, a silent, old promise between the two of them that now includes a third one.

“My parents had a house in the middle of nowhere in Iceland,” he says, a plan starting to take shape in his mind. “We’ve never been there but I know the coordinates to create a Portkey, and that there are a few elves who’ve taken care of it over the years.”

“I should be able to ward it and make it unplottable,” Sirius picks up, already getting to his feet and dragging Regulus with him. “We’ll contact Dumbledore, get a message to him with the information we have and that we’re leaving, nothing more.”

“What about mother?” Regulus asks, the panic receding even though there’s still uncertainty in his eyes. “I know you don’t care but if he saw me, if I disappear…”

Sirius sighs, closing his eyes briefly, but he nods. “Send Kreacher back, order him to not tell anyone but report to her that he hasn’t seen you in days. Voldemort won’t outright kill her if she doesn’t know what’s going on, the support of the family is too important for him.”

There’s a beat of silence as Regulus and Sirius stare at each other, but eventually, Regulus nods, exhaling a sigh. “I hope you’re right.”

Summoning parchment, James hands it to him. “Write down everything you know about – whatever it is you were talking about; I’ll call one of the Potter elves to deliver it later. We’re going to pack a few things, I think Sirius has some clothes that should fit you.”

Regulus nods, fiddling with the quill, and James decides to leave him to it. Just as he and Sirius are about to leave the room, Regulus calls, “Wait!”

Turning back around, James watches him, hoping that there won’t be another argument coming; it’s all a mess already, all of them running on their last reserves of strength, and they can’t afford to lose any more time.

“Thank you,” Regulus says, the words quiet but sincere.

James smiles, but it’s Sirius who answers. “Always.”

As soon as the door to their bedroom closes behind them, Sirius twists, pushing James against the wood and crashing their mouths together.

His own hands come up on instinct, wrapping around Sirius’ waist, and he keeps his eyes closed even as Sirius pulls back to lean their foreheads together.

“We’d all be dead without you,” Sirius chokes out, voice breaking over the words, and his fingers press against James’ jaw so harshly that it’s bordering on painful. “We’d be all dead, and now we have to leave everything behind. Are you – I won’t force you to come with us.”

James huffs a laugh, wet and nearly hysterical. “Merlin, sometimes you’re such an idiot,” he presses out, his own throat closing up. “I’d go anywhere with you, anywhere at all. You should know that by now. And we’ll be safe. At least, we’ll finally be safe.”

The last words linger in his mind, circling as they haphazardly throw clothes and trinkets into bags, packing up only what they’ll need most. Linger as they send off the letter to Dumbledore and create a Portkey out of the mug that Lily gave them as a house-warming gift. As the three of them grab it tightly and are whisked away.

Circle through his mind still, as they set foot into the small cottage at the foot of a mountain, waves crashing in the distance, dark wood cracked with age but warm and cosy and safe.

They’ll be safe.

[sirius-black-killed-god]

Sirius Black and Lily Evans Headcannons

Sirius Black and Lily Evans were best friends from the beginning and no one can change my mind. 

I’m talking RIGHT from the beginning. Sure, Sirius hated Snape and was a bit of a jerk to him, but Sirius also defended Lily when Malfoy called her a Mudblood. 

Sirius and Lily agreed to be friends. It was more of a negotiation at first. Sirius was allowed to hate Snape, if Lily could hate James (he was arrogant and kept proposing marriage and she found him rather obnoxious). Sirius agreed not to prank/hex/maim/or otherwise harm Snape unless Snape did something to provoke it. 

Despite the initial negotiation phase, Lily and Sirius were as thick as thieves by the end of the first year. 

Of course, they bonded over their mutually shitty familial situations. Lily also tells Sirius about Snape, whom she loves as a dear friend, but sees him changing when he’s around Malfoy and the other Slytherins. She’s terrified he’s going down a road that’ll lead only to darkness. Sirius listens and, though it never changes his opinions on Snape, he can’t help but see the parallels in his relationship with Regulus. 

Sirius is constantly terrified that she’ll be a target for being his friend and a Muggle-born, if his parents or Malfoy or the other Death-Eaters-To-Be find out about their friendship. 

Lily proves he needn’t fear for her safety when she puts a hex on the Carrow twins for calling her Mudblood that leaves them in the hospital wing for days. 

Lily figured out Remus was a werewolf about halfway through first year. So, when Sirius goes with Remus to tell Lily in second year, after the Marauders all found out, they’re surprised to find she already knows.

Immediately after this, Lily and Sirius march into Madam Pomfrey’s office and ask to begin Healer training, so that they can help Remus after the full moon. They’re the two youngest Healer candidates in Hogwarts’s history.  

Remus and Lily have a slight competition between them, on who can introduce pure-blood pariah, Sirius Black, to the best works in Muggle literature. They find out quickly that Sirius Black loves romances, but not romances in the conventional sense. He classifies Frankenstein, the Illiad, and Beowulf as romances, and he has a damn good argument for doing so that he will share with anyone who’ll listen. 

Lily effectively wins the literature contest when, in fourth year, she brings a stack of Petunia’s erotica novels. (Sirius is particularly fond of the werewolf romances, but he won’t admit to reading them under any circumstances and will maintain to his dying day that he’s a classy guy who only indulges in classical literature.)

Remus retaliates by a brand new Introduce-Sirius-Black-to-Muggle-Music competition. Remus brings David Bowie, the Beatles, and early Led Zeppelin records one Christmas and the three of them listen for hours. 

Lily also wins this competition by introducing Sirius to Queen. Sirius hears “Bohemian Rhapsody” and immediately professes his undying love for Freddy Mercury. 

James, the poor lovesick soul, is helplessly confused by Sirius’s friendship with Lily. He keeps asking Sirius if he’s snogging Evans, which, obviously he’s not. Once James realizes Sirius’s feelings for her are strictly platonic, thank you very much, he starts pestering Sirius to put in a good word with her. 

Sirius, because he’s a good mate and loves James, does so, at every available opportunity. But, instead of discussing things like James’s unquestioned bravery or dashing good looks, he sticks to more practical positive attributes like, “Did you know, Evans, that of all of the Marauders, James can stick the most Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Beans up his nose? A fine specimen, that James Potter.”

Lily, however, finds this far more endearing than tales of James’s bravery. 

In fourth year, when Sirius proposes this whole Animagus thing, the first person he goes to is Lily Evans, because she’s the smartest. She declines participating, because she’s got enough against her with her blood status and all that she can’t go randomly breaking the law, but she helps the Marauders with research the whole way through. 

Padfoot will often sneak up into the girls dorms late at night - because, hello, turns out being an Animagus is a gaping loophole in the magic of the girls’ staircase - and sit on Lily’s bed for hours, just talking about their respective tragedies (Snape and Regulus) and, more and more frequently, Lily’s growing affection for one James Potter. 

(Sirius, on strict orders from Lily, never tells James about this little loophole in the staircase magic.)

When the Prank happens and Sirius, in a moment of absolute fucking horror, realizes what he’s done, and, more specifically, who he almost killed, immediately runs to find Lily Evans. She has no idea what’s going on, but he runs up to her in a panic and says, “Whatever happens, whatever they tell you, whatever Snape tells you, this was NOT Remus’s fault. It was mine. Hate me all you want, never speak to me again, I don’t care, but don’t you dare blame any of this on Remus. It’s my fault.”

She doesn’t, of course, blame it on Remus. When Sirius is heartbroken and a little drunk, because none of the Marauders will speak to him, Lily finds him and lets him cry. He tells her why he did what he did (Regulus, Death Eaters, killing Dark Creatures, Snape threatening to turn Remus in, etc.) She listens and just lets him cry, then goes and has a strict talk with James about how the Marauders are not to cut Sirius out for this. He made a mistake. Grow a pair and learn to forgive him.

They, of course,  forgive him. 

In sixth year, Lily receives a letter saying that Petunia and Vernon are getting married and, as much as Petunia would prefer Lily not be at the ceremony, their parents demanded it, so she’d better bring a date. As Lily is no longer speaking to Snape and she figures asking James to a wedding would get to his head, she asks Sirius. 

All through the ceremony, Petunia degrades Lily at every opportunity. Her hair is an obnoxious color and can’t you dye that or something? What about those freckles? Lily’s dress is hideous and really meant for someone with a bit more in the bust region, etc. At the end of it, Lily is almost in tears, so Sirius shifts into Padfoot, marches right up to Petunia, and pisses on her wedding dress. This cheers Lily up considerably, and they make a hasty exit.

Seventh year, Sirius starts a betting pool with Remus and Peter on when James and Lily will finally get together, but Remus and Peter decide he’s not fit to participate on such a gamble, because he has insider information. 

Somehow, Sirius manages to get in on the James-and-Lily bet between the staff members and WINS, down to the fucking minute. The Marauders all bow to Sirius’s brilliance when Dumbledore walks up to Sirius at breakfast and forks over ten Galleons. 

The night of graduation, Remus confesses to Sirius that he’s been in love with him for a long time. Sirius, of course, had been completely oblivious to this, and after a long talk with Remus, he has a bit of a crisis. Not about being gay - he’s always known he swings that way - but because this is REMUS. 

So, he Apparates over to James and Lily’s, kicks James out, and has a long talk with Lily. She makes him realize how far he’d go for Remus, without question, and that, duh, you moron, you’re in love with him too. 

Sirius goes back to Remus and... Well, long story short, Lily wins the Order of the Phoenix’s Sirius-and-Remus bet down to the fucking minute. 

During the First War, Sirius and Lily work at St. Mungo’s as junior Healer’s. Lily works in the Potions ward and Sirius mostly works with counter-curses, Dark Magic, and, when it comes up, injuries from Magical Creatures. 

Lily’s parents are killed in a car accident, weeks before her wedding. She’s devastated, and not quite convinced that it wasn’t Death Eater interference, but she also really wants to marry James, so she refuses to delay the ceremony. 

Minutes before the ceremony, she corners Sirius in her dress, and asks him to walk her down the aisle. “I was yours first and I love you, Siri. It’s only fitting you give me away.”

Sirius cries the entire way down the aisle. 

I’ll probably add more later. I love these two. I’ve had these in my head forever and I’ve incorporated quite a few into my ongoing fic, The Boy Who Killed God, if you want to check that out. 

[moonscarsandstars]

Lily: I can’t believe they actually went through with it, honestly.

Alice: I know, it’s just stupid.

Dorcas: the article said they were schoolkids. 

Dorcas: they’re literally our ages, okay?

Lily: i get what you mean, but it’s a little much, don’t you think?

Lily: I mean, I’d expect some backlash if i put whipped cream all over the store’s windows.

Alice: Where’d they even get that much whipped cream from?

Alice: That shit’d cost a fortune.

Alice: I mean, have you seen the size of the freakin shop?

Lily: Ik, it’s a waste of time, money and food.

Remus slowly scrolled through the chats from earlier that evening.

He realy had no idea why the store had a night shift- well, he did; technically it was a 24 hour shop- but other than the occasional contraceptive, no one ever came anywhere beyond eleven.

Lily had tried to convince him not to take the shift. She told him that they had an important class at seven, but he refused skip the shift.

The truth was, he really wanted to buy a hardcover version of Wuthering heights, but it was way beyond the pathetic amount of pocket money he had, and his parents would rather buy the store he was working in than yet another book.

So here he was, running on two cups of coffee, wearing the store’s shirt, and scrolling through his phone in the flickering lights.

The store was relatively empty.

Except for the dishevelled stranger who’d suddenly rushed in, hair flying all around him.

He looked around frantically, before locking eyes with Remus, and promptly stalking towards him.

Remus’s heart sped up, and fear pulsed through his veins, as the man neared him with an intense gaze. But as the man came close, the fierce look in his eyes seemed more weary, and shadows hung under them.

But damn, this man was hot.

He looked no older than Remus himself, with wild, black hair- shoulder length- that wildly flailed around his face. He had black studs on his ears, and sharp cheekbones. Those eyes, however, were a whole new thing. They were hypnotic, and Remus couldn’t bring himself to look away.

There was something familiar about him, though Remus couldn’t put his finger on it.

“How- how can I help you? Remus hoped he didn’t notice the stutter.

“Hi, d’you have thermocol and citric acid?”

“What?”

The man didn’t seem to hear him, as his gaze lingered for a second or two- though it felt like hours- before he shook out of it. His focused expression dropped, and he looked much more relaxed.

“Oh- chemistry project. I- uh- was busy earlier, and this was only shop open near me. Yeah- don’t ask me what old sluggy expects us to do.”

“Sluggy?”

“Slughorn. Can’t blame him for wanting us to refer to him by his first name,” said Sirius, imitating him for the last part.

“Poor bloke must hate his parents.”

“Yeah,” said Sirius with a chuckle.

Remus noticed the man’s eyes slip to his lips unconsciously, and blushed faintly. He didn’t seem to notice, and his gaze lingered for a second again, before he Remus waved a hand in front of his eyes.

“S- sorry- I really need sleep. Anyway- yeah- citric acid and thermocol?”

“Oh,” Remus stretched out his hand behind him before continuing. “I think if you searched there, you might find the thermocol. It’s in the ‘art and crafts’ section.”

“Thanks.” 

And with that, the man rushed back to the ‘arts and crafts’ section.

Remus smirked after the man, feeling butterflies he didn’t realised existed fade away.

He switched on his phone, and swiped to their group chat. 

That’s when it hit him.

The boys in the article. Who put whipped cream all over the roof. Of the store. This hot man was one of them.

Remus started chuckling to himself, earning him a weird look from the man who’d just appeared with a huge slab of thermocol.

“What’s so funny?”

“Looked at my future,” mumbled Remus earning a dry chuckle from the man. “Anyway, the citric acid is most probably at the pharmacy.”

“Thanks.”

As Remus watched the man jog off, he escaped the till he was standing at, quickly making his way to the refrigerated section. Skimming over it, he found what he was looking for, and quickly made his way back at the till.

Not a moment or two later, the man came from the pharmacy with a bottle of citric acid and a hairbrush.

“Highly doubt ‘Sluggy’ wants neat hair as a part of his experiment,” mused Remus.

“Oh, don’t you know? Taking care of your hair is punk rock, no matter what James says.”

“I’m going to assume that James is your partner in crime.”

The man let out a chuckle, before it fell from his face in confusion.

Remus produced a bottle of whipped cream from below the till, earning him a loud bark of laughter, that even drew a grin from Remus himself.

“Has the whole world heard about it at this point?”

“Nah, Lily’s just way too obsessed with the headlines.”

“Oh my god.” Sirius stopped dead in his tracks, the grin still painted on his face. “Isn’t Lily the part time bartender- redhead?”

“Yeah? How did you know?”

“James is the bloke with messy hair, glasses, and heart-eyes for her.”

“That’s James? She’s been mooning for him forever now!”

“You’re kidding. James would start singing.”

“Really not. I’ve seen her taking the till whenever he comes in.”

“Oh no, poor girl. She could do better than James.”

“Sure she could, that’s what I keep telling her. But no, she’s stuck on him.”

“That’s really the saddest thing I’ve heard all day, and believe me when I say this has been a strange day.”

Just then, the man’s phone started ringing. He mouthed “sorry, one sec,” before picking it up.

It was then that Remus realised.

He was head over heels for the man.

And he didn’t even know the man’s bloody name.

As the man put the phone back in the pockets of his jeans, Remus resisted the urge to pull him over the counter and do things he’d be fired for.

“What’s your name?”

“Sirius. Sirius Black.”

“The star?”

“Why thank you, I am a star,” said Sirius coyly, before continuing. “Yeah, like the star. My biological parents were into the whole star thing, I mean, my brother was called Regulus.”

Remus was confused by the word biological, but decided not to press further.

“Anyway,” Sirius said. “As nice as this is, I need to go now.”

“Oh, right.”

Remus collected the items, and scanned the barcode. It was a robotic process really, one he could do in his sleep. He collected the bill, and held his hand out for the cash, stuffing it in the counter.

“D’you want the receipt?”

“Yeah, sure.”

Remus collected the bill, before an idea struck him. As Sirius fumbled with the items, trying to stuff them in a plastic bag, Remus found a pen, and scribbled down his number onto the bill.

“Here you go,” he said, holding it out and turning around to hide a grin.

It was barely a few moments after he’d left the building, that Remus felt his phone vibrate. He opened it, grinned widely as he saw the notification.

(501) 961-806: never thanked you for the free whipped cream.

[siriuslyblack12]

chapter 7

“For the last time, I am not going as Dorothy for Halloween!” Sirius exclaimed.

 “Well it’s either me or you, and mum’s already made my tin man costume. It’s sick, by the way.” James pleaded.

 Remus put his face in his hands and groaned. The marauders were famous for their group costumes, but they’d been arguing about their plans the whole day. “I told you Wizard of Oz was a bad idea, why can’t we do Scooby-Doo like Peter said?”

 “Because Remus, Mary said that Lily said that Scooby-Doo isn’t cool. We have to be cool.” James said, as if he was offended that the other boy didn’t already know. It was truly pathetic, how much he sacrificed for a girl who supposedly didn’t even like him back. “Plus two of us would have to dress as girls, so unless you want to spend the night in an orange turtleneck and a wig, we’re doing Wizard of Oz.”

 Gregg’s perhaps wasn’t the best place to discuss their Halloween plans, as firstly, they were surrounded by people they weren’t inviting to their party and secondly, Peter’s mouth was full of pastry. Sirius took one of the many rolls the boy had laying in front of him and took a bite for himself, arms around Remus’s shoulders. “Who’s to say that he wouldn’t be Daphne?”

 “’m not being Daphne, or Velma for that matter. I thought we agreed that I’d be Shaggy.”

 “More like shag me!” Sirius laughed far too loudly considering they were in a public place. “You’re Daphne, I’m Velma, Peter’s Shaggy and James is Fred. We could even get Lils to be Scooby, if it’s cool enough for her.”

 “It’s definitely not.” James said, “I don’t even know why you’re so opposed to Dorothy, I reckon you could pull it off.”

 “You’re talking to a taken man here Prongs, but I appreciate the sentiment.”

 Remus rolled his eyes but sunk further into Sirius’s arms, relishing in the heat. They’d been together for a little over a month, and it had been the best month of life. Dates, dinners, just spending time together still made his stomach flip. “Well it’s good that I agree with James then, isn’t it?”

 Peter finally spoke, the pastries gone from his mouth, “Maybe we should vote on it.”

 There was a general hum of agreement on the table, and Peter continued, “All in favour of Scooby-Doo?” Sirius raised his hand, glaring at Remus, obviously trying to get him to do the same. “All in favour of Wizard of Oz?” Everybody except Sirius raised their hand, in fact he defiantly pressed his down into the table.

 “Then it’s settled, we get to see Padfoot in heels!” James said excitedly.

 “You should be so lucky.”

 Remus sighed, jumping in before there was a full out brotherly brawl between the two boys, “Where are we even going? I thought Marlene said she couldn’t host this year.”

 “That’s true,” Sirius began. “Which is why we’re going to Mary’s. Who knew that Mary fucking MacDonald was a party animal? The girl who got like, 5 A’s in her exams last year.”

 “I can’t tell if that’s an insult or not.” Peter said cautiously. He and Mary had also been steadily dating since September, spending even more time together than before. It was quite rare to see the two apart.

 Sirius laughed, “Well considering our Moony’s grades were even better than that, I’d say it’s not.”

 “How the fuck is everyone so smart?” James groaned.

 Remus chuckled along with everyone, mostly because he didn’t want to confront it. He himself had no idea how he’d managed to get the grades he’d gotten, but he wasn’t exactly complaining. His mum had bought him a cake and everything.

 Peter cleared his throat, standing unceremoniously. “Well, my mum probably wants me back home soon. I’ll see you at Mary’s.”

 They watched as he gathered his things and left with a final wave and smile, followed by James doing the same, “C’mon Pads, mum said we could have the TV today. Finally!”

 It didn’t go unnoticed to Remus how Sirius’s face lit up in glee at the mention of Mrs Potter. The smile spread over his face all the way up to his eyes, dimples settling in his cheeks. He was so happy. He wished it could always be like that. “You go ahead… me and Re might stay  for a bit.”

 Remus’s eyebrows shot up, “Will we now?”

 “Only if you want.”

 He scoffed at the thought that he’d turn down spending time with his boyfriend, yet was secretly delighted that Sirius cared enough to ask the question. James waved them off with a knowing smirk as Remus’s hand was grabbed and dragged out of the bakery. Excitable puppy.

  It was only half an hour later as the two sat atop a hill onlooking the business of the town, their hands threaded between them and the other clutching some cheap brand of chocolate. The crisp Autumn air surrounded them, enclosing them in the comfort and peace of the gradually lowering sun. Remus went to look over at Sirius, only to find him looking right back at him. He smiled.

 “You always look at me like that,” Remus started with adoration. “Like I’m worth something, or like I’m precious. I don’t know.”

 “You are precious, Moons. For some reason you refuse to admit it, I’m just saying what everybody’s thinking.” Sirius said smugly. It was almost matter-of-factly, like he was so sure and confident in what he was saying.

 Remus rolled his eyes, biting back the biggest grin in favour of leaning towards the boy for a sweet kiss. It was brief, but still made his head spin as he broke away drearily, “Baby.”

 “Baby?” Sirius laughed. He took a strand of Remus’s hair between his two fingers and twirled it absentmindedly. “I like it.”

 “You think it’s stupid.”

 “I don’t!” He only laughed harder, tackling his boyfriend to the ground despite his loud protests. They fell into each other arms as they rolled over in the grass, smiling wide and chuckling to themselves. “I like it. I really do.”

 Remus smiled, still disbelieving but feeling sarcastic enough to comment, “Whatever you say, baby.”

 “Fuck, I love it!” Sirius groaned and met his lips in a longer kiss. He licked into his mouth through the smile on his face, hands cupping around the back of his neck. Remus sighed softly as the boy in front of him moved down to his neck ever so softly; leading him to blink up at the sky. Content and love were the only two thoughts running through his mind.

 I can’t love him already, can I? Isn’t it too soon?

 “Sirius-, you do know we’re, shit, we’re in public.” His thoughts were incoherent with the feather-light brush of lips just below his jaw.

 Sirius pulled away slowly with one last peck to Remus’s lips, pausing for a moment to drink in his features. He bit his lip in a manner that could only be considered seductive. “I apologise, your majesty.” That earned him a punch to the shoulder. “We could go back to your house, if you want. Would your mum mind?”

 Remus considered it, before deciding, “It’s probably best if we stay here, unless you want to answer about a million questions about everything she can think of.”

 “I really don’t mind-“

 “I know that,” He cut him off, drawing his eyes back to the view in front of him. Truth be told, he thought the real view was Sirius. “I just don’t think I could handle it. When I’m out to her, maybe. Or whenever she’s not in.”

 Sirius nodded to show he understood and followed Remus’s gaze. “What about James’s house then? Sometimes I think mum loves us more than she loves James.”

 “To be fair, can you really blame her?”

 He shoved Remus’s chest and barked that beautiful laugh that was so often heard falling from his lips. “I’m telling Prongs you said that!”

 “I’d like to see you try.” Remus teased lightly, thus ensuing another tackle to the ground. He hid his face in the collar of Sirius’s jacket to stifle his laugh. He couldn’t believe how lucky he was to have found someone he could be so open with, someone that would listen happily to every one of his minor inconveniences or whims. Suddenly, his thoughts drowning out reality, the atmosphere around them became a lot sadder, more gentile. “You call Mrs Potter mum.”

 “Well noticed.”

 Remus put a hand to his heart in mock offence, “I was just wondering what is was about, that’s all. It’s not exactly like the time you called McGonagall mum by accident, is it?”

 Sirius whined in protest at the mention of that infamous incident, protesting that the boys promised to never mention it again. The exact details were largely unknown, but it was held above his head to torment him playfully nonetheless. “I’ve been staying with them since… well you know, I guess it’s just become a habit. At least she’s better than my actual mother.” He laughed bitterly.

 Remus’s lips thinned out as he asked cautiously, “Have you spoken to Regulus since we saw him?” After saying it he realised how it could have come off. “Not that… Never mind, I shouldn’t have asked.”

 “No, no, it’s okay. It’s…” Sirius trailed off, hands clutching at Remus’s waist as if trying to steady himself. “Short answer, no I haven’t.”

 Remus made a sympathetic noise, “Do you want to speak to him?”

 I’m over-stepping. I shouldn’t have brought it up.

 “Of course I do, to be honest I just don’t know how. He’s so far away, you know? And he’s still in that fucking house and I just-“ Sirius sighed in frustration and hung his head, a small smile still determined to stay put on his lips.

 Bringing the dark-haired boy to his chest, Remus tried his best to reassure him. “There’s no pressure to do anything, Pads. Find him whenever you’re ready, whether that’s tomorrow or in a month.”

 “I know.” Sirius said quietly. “It’s just… a lot. What would I even say?”

 “Whatever you need to, baby.”

  ~~

  Sirius wasn’t exactly sure what he’d been expecting when he’d asked Regulus to come meet him in the park near the Black house. Memories of his childhood flashed through his mind, being in that park, playing with his little brother without a care in the world. He wondered when everything had started to get so messed up, and if it could ever be like it was. For now he would just have to take Remus’s advice and talk to him. Say whatever he needed to.

 “Do you remember that game we used to play? The castle one? We’d stay here all day waiting for the climbing frame to be free and then pretend it was our castle, like we were in charge.” A familiar voice said coming up beside him.

 “Reg-”

 “No, no, let me.” Regulus insisted, taking in a deep breath to steady his nerves. “I hope your happy.”

 Sirius spoke slightly louder than his brother, temper rising at the surprising change in tone, “What?”

 “You finally got what you wanted, didn’t you? You’ve never liked it there, even when we were kids and everything was fine, you still weren’t happy. Well congratulations, you won. You fucking won and now you never have to go back. Some of us aren’t that lucky.” The last words were almost spat, ended with a bite of bitterness. His face was drained of colour, jaw set defiantly.

 “Nothing was ever ‘fine’ about that house and you know it. How the hell was I supposed to stay?” Sirius replied through gritted teeth.

 “You’re asking someone who did have to stay, you do know that right?”

 Sirius looked at his brother face on for the first time in weeks, examining it closely and seeing the nerve that had been struck paint itself visibly. His heart filled with sympathy, but his head still maintained his anger. He couldn’t understand the position Regulus was in. He could never understand the position Regulus was in.

 “I always knew you were selfish.” Regulus turned away from the close eyes.

 Sirius stepped forward, fingers pointing into his brother’s chest to emphasise his point, “You can’t call me fucking selfish for caring about myself, okay! I’m sorry, I am so, so sorry, for leaving you there, Reg. I’m trying to make it better, I really am, but if you’re going to stand there and call me selfish and tell me I shouldn’t have done it then you can leave. Right now.”

 Regulus was quiet for a few moments before turning back and muttering a short “Sorry.”

 The two fell away from each other in a silent truce, eyes flicking over the park in front of them. So many memories, all of which dear to each of their hearts. “How can I help you?”

 “I don’t know if you can.” Regulus replied honestly, fighting back the welling of tears. “It’s not as simple as just leaving, Sirius.” He didn’t even realise that that was the first time he’d said that name in weeks.

 Sirius pulled down the cuffs of his jacket, “There’s always room for you at the Potter’s.”

 “Not bloody likely.”

 “Is that why the first thing James asked me when I went there is if you were with me?”

 Regulus huffed, running a hand through his hair in a similar manner to Sirius’s own nervous gesture. It was a known fact that he didn’t really like his brother’s friends, which only made him more suspicious of James Potter’s sudden interest in his well-being. “Mother will be wondering why I’m not home already, I best go.”

 “’m not stopping you.” Sirius fished his phone out of his pocket and clicked it on, seeing a few unopened messages from Marlene and Remus when an idea came to his mind. “Text me if you need anything, whenever you feel like it. I don’t think dear Mother could manage to police who you’re talking to.”

 After a hum of agreement from Regulus, he continued, “You could come to Mary’s Halloween party as well, I remember how much you used to love dressing up.”

 “I don’t think that’s such a good idea.”

 “Just think about it.” Sirius pleaded, hands pressed together. “I’ll text you the details.”

 Before he knew what he was doing, he pulled his brother into what was at first a casual hug, which then turned into a tight embrace. The tears that had been building in Regulus’s eyes spilled slowly as he held onto Sirius tighter than he’d ever held anyone, hooking his chin over his shoulder. Maybe he would go to this Halloween party, if it meant getting away from his Mother and closer to the only member of his family he truly cared for.

  ~~

  October 31st was a night that for many meant dressing up, eating sweets and having youthful fun. For others it was more about the parties, drinking and drugs and all things that would be regretted in the morning. For the marauders however, most popular people in the school, resident trouble-makers, why couldn’t they have both?

 “Oi Pete, stop eating all the snacks! The rest of us want to eat too.” Remus could hear James shout over the noise of the music blasting through the house.

 “Leave the man be, Prongs. If he wants to stuff his face on mini-sandwiches who are we to stop him?” Sirius reasoned, taking one between his fingers and holding it up to Remus’s mouth. The boy sighed, rolling his eyes, but took the food that was offered to him nonetheless.

 He’s cheesy. Good to know.

 James took his attention away from Peter and towards the affection couple, smiling brightly, “Aw, you guys are too cute.” They groaned at that, before he muttered, “Me and Evans could have that, but she has to go around calling me ‘arrogant’, ‘self-centred’ and ‘the biggest prick she’s ever seen’. What’s she even on about?”

 “I stand behind that!” Lily said from somewhere in the living room.

 It was quite hard for Remus to take the scene in front of him seriously, considering everyone had dressed as beloved characters. Sirius had gone as far as to tie his hair up in two pigtails, red ribbons in tow, and wear one of Marlene’s blue dresses (with shorts underneath it, he’d assured everyone). He looked good. Remus had never thought he’d think that about someone in a Dorothy costume. For a moment he forgot that he could now do something about it, but before long he was stepping forward and taking the boy in his arms.

 Sirius let out a surprised laugh, “Hi.”

 “Hey.”

 “You want another mini-sandwich? You should probably have some now before they’re gone.”

 “I’m good.”

 The two stayed like that for a few moments, basking in each other’s arms peacefully. They had already been such good friends that this felt natural and comfortable. It was sweet, a little excessive, but after pining for so long it was almost necessary to be close as often as possible. Making up for lost time. Remus noticed Sirius glance at the door worriedly, and so asked “Waiting for someone?”

 Sirius’s tongue darted out to wet his lips, “You could say that, yeah.”

 Remus gave him a concerned look, shifting so that his arms fell loosely around they boy’s waist, “Who? I thought everyone was already here.”

 Looking into the tawny-haired boy’s eyes, he thought for a moment. He’d invited Regulus without telling anyone, not even Mary, and it wasn’t exactly as if he was friends with anyone there. “Don’t worry about it, they’re probably not coming anyway.”

 “Hey, hey,” Remus said as Sirius went to turn away from his embrace. Putting together the pieces in his mind, it was all much clearer than it had been, “It’s not Regulus, is it?”

 “It doesn’t matter,” The boy dismissed. “Let’s just have a good time.”

 With a final caring look at each other, Sirius trying his best to reassure the other, the two moved into the party and separated reluctantly to spend their time equally between most of the people there. Remus found Lily and Dorcas, talking excitedly about some book or other over the fireplace and found himself joining them in conversation. He couldn’t help but notice Dorcas’s strange costume: a furry blue jacket and eyes painted onto a hat.

 “I thought you and Marlene were doing a couple’s costume,” He prompted gently. “No offence or anything, but what the hell is this supposed to be?”

 She smiled, “I’m the cookie monster, obviously. Marlene is Elmo.”

 “Because they’re such a famous couple.” Lily said amusedly, arms folded across her chest.

 “Of course.”

  Sirius had found the other half of the strange couple, along with James, and the three were discussing the latest football match. He himself didn’t care much for the sport, favouring swimming far more, but watching his friends animatedly replay it was entertaining on it’s own.

 “Did you see that penalty though!” Marlene exclaimed. “Sirius, what did you think?”

 Startled and confused, he simply replied with the first thing that came to his mind after listening to their discussions, “It was ludicrous, yeah.”

 “You’ve said that about everything, mate.” James laughed.

 “Fuck.”

 As they continued to talk and gossip, Sirius found his eyes flicking over the room to find Remus, deep in his own conversation. He was hit with a wave of emotion, of love, as he watched the way his hands moved as he made his point and the curls of his hair bounced as his head nodded to something Lily had said. This only grew as Remus met his eyes and sent him the most dazzling grin, causing Sirius to swoon slightly.

 Peter was off somewhere else in the house, most likely damaging things and making Mary run after him; James was talking everyone’s ear of; Regulus couldn’t even show up to the party in the first place but the only boy that mattered to Sirius in that moment was the one he was looking at. The boy he was in love with. And suddenly, just looking at him, the rest of the world fell away and it was just the two of them. Just for a moment, it could be like that.