#then again it would be better if we Literally Ever stuck to the fucking schedule

[supercantaloupe]

christ they're running us ragged over here

[kaonarvna]

Going through so much right now. Barely have the capacity to do much of anything aside from work and take care of myself and my spouse.

Autistic burnout is truly a cruel mistress. As is having undiagnosed ADHD, knowing what your unmet needs are, and not having the means to access the support you require.

Big vent below. Workplace ableism. ADHD/AuDHD vent.

My spouse is quitting his job again. It happens every year. We've only just now realised "oh my god, it's the autism. It was always the autism" for why he keeps hopping.

He's leaving the current job because they're failing to give him what seems like the most basic accommodations (written instructions, scheduled meetings/literally any notice instead of impromptu "informal chats" in hallways with no record, basic empathy).

He's being told off for "speaking too loudly" and "speaking too enthusiastically" even though all he's talking about with his colleagues is work. They took away his office to turn it into a meeting room, forced him into the communal office space, and have now told him to stop talking to himself or his colleagues.

It's heartbreaking. It's been slowly creeping in for months and it's taken too long for us to realise "oh my god, you need a diagnosis, this is just fucking discrimination, you need formal accommodations and support".

So he's off on the sick now because his stress has become so severe that he just can't function. Before he got the sick note he'd come home and crash every day, and dreaded going to work. He role-played being a warhammer 40k servitor (lobotomised and obedient worker drone, basically) to help him get through the day of staying quiet and doing nothing but work. He'd come home and need so much sensory input and support. And he slept so much, and so poorly. He started to "fail the speech checks" (massively miss social cues and say the wrong thing) with colleagues at work, and came home embarrassed in ways he never was before. He's a very very social animal, and didn't think he had social difficulties, but now he's so worn down that he's realised he does.

He can't mask anymore. He's so tired.

And now that he got that sick note, and plans to leave, he's not dreading waking up each day nearly as much. He's still in the sensory sock every day, and he's still sad and overwhelmed, but he's feeling better.

We've started the process of getting him a diagnosis, but it's going to take months and months and months. We don't really have months. We're going to start applying for new jobs for him, and hopefully get him out of labs. You'd think a chemical laboratory would be the perfect place for an autistic man who loves STEM, but management has always made it unworkable for him. He's always slowly forced out.

And I can barely take care of him, between working full time and having EDS. And I've finally realised I desperately need that ADHD diagnosis, and I need meds. I haven't felt like a person in so long. I haven't felt like myself in years. I feel like this abstract creature inside this horrible prison, and the controls don't work anymore.

Every mental health professional I've seen has asked me, "Have you ever been assessed for ADHD? You've already adopted all the coping mechanisms and lifestyle changes I could recommend. I can't diagnose you, but yknow, think about it."

I've always suspected it. I know I'm autistic. All signs point to ADHD too.

I looked back on every stimulant I've put in my body, and realised that all of them made my brain emptier. They all gave me more control. I was always more able to make choices and act upon them. But I used to associate that with the pain relief (think kratom, nefopam, etc) not the stimulant.

So when I got my pain mostly under control, and I manage it now, I couldn't figure out why I still had so little control over myself.

It's the fucking ADHD.

How much time have I lost to being undiagnosed and unmedicated? How much of my life has slipped down the drain while I paced back and forth, or laid in place "stuck", or ping ponged from incomplete task to incomplete task until I crashed? How much more pleasure could I have experienced if my brain wasn't full of constant noise and thirty different versions of the same thought?

How much have I hurt myself by going "you're fine, you don't need meds" for so many years?

I don't know how long it's going to take to get diagnosed. I've started the process and now we just...wait. But all the evidence points to "yes", and that "meds will probably work and make a massive difference for your quality of life". I might get to be a person someday, or at least a more fulfilled creature.

[thestayathomedragon]

WIP Wednesday

It's that time again...

TW: Suicidal Ideation

Leon thinks about how even after all this time how naïve he is. That he still hasn’t changed much at all. He really believed that he could save Luis when his life has been nothing but failure after failure, heartbreak after heartbreak these long ten years. He really thought that he could save Luis and that having him here would make him better somehow.

How could he ever have thought that?

In fact, his being with Luis had only made things worse. Luis died to save him. A man so fucking unworthy of such a sacrifice.

He thought that he had been heartbroken with the loss before but now after having spent so much time with Luis and getting an even clearer picture of everything he’d lost, he was shattered.

Of course, once again foolish, naïve, Leon Kennedy had only made things worse for himself.

Maybe he should just stop trying. Maybe he should finally give it up. His eyes drift to the pistol he kept on his bedside table.

It’s not like anyone would even miss him.

There isn’t anyone. Hasn’t been for a long time. It feels like everyone has moved on and he’s stuck here. Stuck there. Back in Spain. Back in 2004. Still literally covered in blood, sweat and tears.

And maybe he could… Maybe there would be some peace afterward. Maybe he could finally get what he wanted so badly.

Maybe that was it. Maybe Luis had just been waiting for him to figure it out all this time.

------

“But what if it is?” Luis was more agitated than Leon ever remembered seeing him. “What if it is my fault, Leon?”

They had never had this conversation before.

“You don’t say something like that to someone that’s almost caused an apocalypse twice.”

“What if I said I didn’t care about that?” Leon knew he was being unduly flippant, but he couldn’t help but think about how little time they had for this. There was a timeline to keep in mind here. They could only go so far off schedule before something else he hadn’t planned for came up.

“I would ask what the hell is wrong with you?” Luis was of course not unmoved by his declaration. It was just in the opposite direction than he had intended.  

“A lot of things.” Leon laughed bitterly and then sighed. “This world is shit, Luis. You and I both know it. Does anything we do ever change that?”

Luis shrugged, helplessly, “Maybe it’s us. Maybe we’re the problem then, eh? Maybe we’re just shit at doing anything good.”

“Doomed from the start, huh?” Knowing what he did about Luis’s past and his own Leon wouldn’t doubt it. “All the more reason to say, ‘Fuck it’ then, right?”

 “You’re a bad influence, mi amigo.” Luis scoffs and shakes his head.

[throwingmuses]

hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii its been Quite a minute since i last postd huh . nothing serious going on 2 worry about thankfully im just uhhh Starting to think that we were Not built to endure thhe 40-hour work week ? But what the fuck ever i guess we ummmmm adapt!!!!!!!*grins nicely*

(""life update"" undr the cut for the freaks who r into tht kinda thing ...)

SO the new job has actually been going pretty good so far. Well as good as working any minimum wage job can be of course but it s certainly been a real decent gig regardless. surprisingly enjoyable at times even which is Huge. Definitely muchhhhhh better than evry single one of my previous jobs LOL. most difficult thing about it hasnt even rlly been related to the job itself but moreso the fact that this is the first time in FOUR whole ass years that ive like uhhh actually worked in the traditional sense i guess ? not 2 mention the other fact Which is that this is also the first time in my lyfe that i am workin full-time w/ an actually consistent schedule instead of like the spotty ""part time"" retail/restaurant shifts im used to having to put up with Oh also i work 10 hr shifts 4days in a row now so uhhhhhhh yeah theres been a lottt of adjusting ive needed to do lately To Say The Fucking Least 😀 on top that of course theres always 10millionbillion things that are demanding the money i hvnt even been paid yet beCause payroll has been a nightmare And also my psychiatrist turned into a total flake and general jackass out of literally nowhere so i gotta find a new one of those uhhh pretty soon actually LOL but i guess considering evrything that has rapidly changed in like every single area of my life recently i think ive actually been coping alright. or at least MUCH better than i hav in the past jesus fucking christtttttttttttt. mostly just been having a lot of sobbing fits and smoking a lot of pot but like whats new there right. so i would say thats pretty good given my track record :]

luckily my job does not require much if any real socializing as like a job duty or anything (THANK FUCKING GOD) But especially aftr spending a verrrrrryyyyyy long time isolating and essentially imprisoning myself in my home due 2 xtremely awful agoraphobia in conjunction with the fact of just like being Visibly Mentally Unwell and having to just embrace that as apart of who i am or whatever Any and every interaction i have with any other given person @ work makes me feel totally & completely socially maladjusted and PAINFULLY awkward and pathetic....... But at least im becoming more comfortable w/ the concept of being or at least being seen as a bumbling little freak and just feel like ive been coming back in2 myself finally once again and figuring out what all of that shit means now. the haze ive been kindof stuck in for several years by now has been clearing more and more as the days go on and im finding that im starting 2 move on from a lot of different things without even rlly intending to. ive just been generally letting go en masse but this time not in the self - destructive fashion. its nice to be able to say that and to finally have that previously unimaginable inverse experience where u encounter those things that typically rocket U up to neurotic levels of distress only 2 find yourself reacting to them as if u had never or had even entirely forgotten that you were ever tormented by those things in the 1st place . literally fucking unimaginable to me And yet somehow it just likeee happens. whut the fuck. But i dont really need or want to understand it cuz im just happy to b able to objectively say tht my life is getting better. also a previously unimaginable concept to me but one thats been seeming more and more plausible somehow despite all of the bullshit yknow?

ANYWAYS all that being said i also wanted 2 mention that over the next few days i will finally be able to go thru my inbox and share all the fundraisers ive been asked to share here since i am actually not busy as balls for a bit (For Fucking Once), but since theres quite a few ill be queueing them to post over the span of the next couple days or so to make sure they can be seen by more people!!!

okay thnx for reading(/glacing at) all of this love U now back to my typical bullshit

[moonjxsung]

Thank you. Grab a cup of tea, this is so silly but I just need to tell someone, and I don't want to worry my friends. I've been... I'm not sure if bullied is the right term, but some people at work have been pretty mean to me these past months. It got really bad a few weeks ago, bad enough that I broke down and cried with my boss because it's just insidious enough that you can't act right away, it's small things, like lying about my schedule to make me look bad, tell me lies so I look stupid in presentations in front of people (I'll definitely exorcise all of this in a fic one day). My boss kept telling me he thought it was just honest mistakes from them, but he would talk to them and I think it worked to an extend. Except today was the Christmas party (God I sound like a bad Netflix movie). I helped them. We had to be dressed up in silly costumes so I did it. And was basically excluded from the whole thing. A few people from other services came to tell me they felt a little bad for me. And while I don't really care (this is just stupid work stuff) it's just so mean spirited it's getting to me tonight. They did the same thing to another guy (one of my friends) months ago. And tonight while it was happening I was thinking "oh yeah. it's my turn now". It makes me sad because now everyone just know something is wrong. Everyone want to ask me if I'm okay. And I want to pretend I am, because again, this is silly, but at the same time I want to be honest. It hurts being excluded. It sucks knowing this is just because these people don't like me "because I'm too nice, boring and don't fit in" (their words). I don't celebrate Christmas with my family anymore so this was the only time I could pretend to be normal and well. Now if I say something I'm the bad guy who's blowing this out of proportion. So I'll keep smiling and telling people I'm okay with this. But it sucks. Oh, and I ranted enough so I'll stop here but they did the same for my birthday. Told me they organized a party for me and long story short, there was no party when I showed up. I'm sad. That's it. I'm just sad.

Bestie your coworkers sound like awful people first of all. SECOND I am SO sorry you’re going through this ☹️🫶 aren’t work politics just the fucking worst?? In early college I worked at a clothing store and the people there just did NOT fw me in the slightest and there was one girl in particular who would constantly make jokes about how she was annoyed when we got scheduled together or when I would ask for help on things I didn’t know how to do. I think I left crying nearly every single day that I worked there, but it was just also this feeling of WHYYY are you treating me like this? Like what on earth do you gain by being a shitty person to a colleague??

I’m sorry they excluded you from the Christmas party, that’s supposed to be a fun time and it’s so insidious to gang up on you like that. I would’ve cried to my boss too! But I think what you’re doing right now is the best thing you can do- persist and smile through it. Don’t give them the reaction they want, at least not in front of them. Your personality will get you just about anywhere these days, and the more you can build on your strength of putting up with shitty people, the more you can use that skill to get you even further than they are in life. They’ll just be stuck being miserable pieces of shit who find joy in bullying others (yes that’s literally bullying) and YOU will be the bigger person who learned how to live through it and tell the tale. Keep your head up, these people aren’t worth a second of your spare thoughts or your tears!!! And if you’re ever around them and they’re being pieces of shit you can always message me on here and we will talk shit about them in real time. OKAY? Okay. I love u. And you deserve better!! Rooting for you always and I have your back even if it’s through a little phone screen. Fuck them fr 🚮

Sending you all my love!!!!!! 🫶🫶🫶☹️💓❤️❤️❤️

[ptergwen]

love is more than a word

w/c: a very ouch 3.6k

warnings: so so so much angst and an unhealthy (ish) relationship

summary: after nearly four years together, peter has stopped trying

a/n: listen y’all i don’t know what came over me when i made this but i think it’s the saddest thing i’ve ever written? uh try to enjoy tho

-

you never thought this would happen, but you’re getting tired of peter. it isn’t your fault. that cliche it’s not you, it’s me line doesn’t apply here.

at first, you actually did find yourself believing the it’s me part. you’d came to the conclusion that you expect too much from peter. he goes to class, he works, patrols, sometimes parties, takes you out when he can. he’s got a lot going on for a full time college student, which is a busy life to lead on its own.

it’s why you don’t complain when he wants to spend the night in and order a pizza instead of cooking together like you’ve been wanting to try. it’s why every time your friends ask you two to hang, you have to reluctantly explain that peter is passed out at eight o’clock on a saturday.

there’s a lazy “wanna make out?” some nights, if peter isn’t yawning when he steps through the front door. even that has lost its enjoyment. kissing peter doesn’t give you the rush it used to, the taste of his strawberry chapstick not flooding your senses and intoxicating you. it’s become predictable. comfortable. boring.

peter is boring.

you’ve slipped into unspoken routine. say your hello’s, work on separate assignments in different rooms. peter eventually yells something like “babe, you hungry yet?” across the apartment, his passive way of asking you to make dinner. you usually order takeout because why make an effort if he doesn’t?

you might watch one of the ten movies peter has liked since before the start of your relationship. he’ll usually fall asleep during it. no surprise there. his overpacked schedule exhausts him, which you’ve talked to him about spreading himself too thin. peter is too nice and can’t say no, so this is where it leaves him.

the main reason you’ve stayed with him is that he can’t take care of himself. he’s clueless about paying the bills, sorting his laundry, simply remembering to drink water. peter wouldn’t be able to go a week without you. he even says it himself.

“crap, i totally forgot about these,” when you picked up his special ordered textbooks from your school library. “can food go in the garbage disposal?” a rare time you didn’t wash the dishes. “thank you, y/n/n. you’re literally a lifesaver,” whenever you do a task for him that someone in their 20s shouldn’t need assistance with.

you didn’t used to mind much. he watches over the city every night. you felt you should return the favor. spider-man could use some help, too. after the almost four years you’ve been together, peter has become completely dependent on you. it only got worse when you moved in together your junior year. you’re concerned how he’ll manage later in his adult life.

you’d think he’d be a little more passionate about your relationship considering how much he needs you. you know peter still loves you, of course he does. that’s not what the problem is. he’s become content with the mutual feeling, so he doesn’t try anymore. he expects the spark to keep itself lit.

no more random joke of the day texts that he used to send you. he stopped surprising you with your coffee order in the morning, the one that he memorized the first time you two went to a starbucks. what you initially found most endearing about peter was that he remembered every little thing you told him.

he put whatever energy he had into showing you that he listened. he’d do it all with rosy cheeks and that toothy smile of his. it seems now like he’s under the impression that being in a long term relationship means none of that matters anymore. there’s no need to impress you, keep you guessing, make you feel special.

tonight is your breaking point. as you go over all of this in your head while peter lays peacefully next to you, you can’t take it. you’ve been making so many excuses for him. you lie to yourself. you’re desperate to believe this is okay and normal and you can work this out, and you can love whatever version of him this is.

but, you can’t. you can’t do it. you need to tell him now because if you sleep on this, you’ll end up feeling bad and be stuck under these suffocating blankets forever.

“peter?” you whisper his name, your back turned to him in bed. you haven’t cuddled each other to sleep in a while. his arms don’t make you feel held now, they make you feel trapped. you’ve been forcing yourself to ignore his look of hurt when you reject his open embrace.

“peter?” you speak louder after a moment of silence, except for his occasional snores. a loud one escapes him before they stop altogether. his eyes stay shut as he mumbles out a, “uh... huh?” your heart is thudding through your entire body. you take a breath in from your nose. “i wanna break up.”

the breath you let out next is one of relief, those three words that have been scratching your throat for months finally out. peter slowly turns his head over his shoulder. he blinks rapidly at your motionless figure. you’re still not facing him.

“what?” is all he says. his voice is surprisingly steady, the confession not yet registering with his sleepy mind. his eyes are burning into you. “i wanna break up,” you repeat and squish your face further into your pillow. peter suddenly sits up, flicking on the lamp on his side. he tries to sling an arm around you. you move further away until you’re at the edge of the bed.

“i’m serious, peter. everything we had, it’s gone.” your words cut through him harder than literal knives he’s been stabbed with. “i- i don’t understand. where is this coming from?” he rakes a hand through his mess of curls. you turn onto your back, looking up at peter. his eyes are fixed on your lower half.

he’ll most definitely cry if he meets your eyes. he really doesn’t want to cry, not ever again when you won’t be here to make him feel better.

“it’s been coming,” you almost scoff at him as you prop yourself up against your pillows. peter’s teeth tug at his lower lip. “all we do is this.” you gesture to your bed, slapping your hand down at your side. “i get tired,” he speaks quietly, refusing to look at you. “i know you do, peter. i know, but you’d be a lot happier if you ever listened to me.”

your statement comes off as condescending to him. he works up the courage to look you in the face. “are you kidding? all you do is boss me around, and i take it. i’ve never once complained.” anger is coursing through his veins and voice. at the situation, that he’s about to lose the one stable part of his life. you’re getting pissed, too.

“that’s because you can’t do anything yourself!” you throw the blankets off you and swing your legs over the bed in one motion. peter hops out of bed entirely. “my whole life, i’ve been on my own half the time,” he spits as he comes over to stand in front of you. “sorry for taking you up on your offers to help.”

your peter would never spew that shit out. he wouldn’t guilt you for something he’s in the wrong about. this peter takes you for granted. he has no clue how fucked he’d be without you.

the first time you spoke to peter was on your way to history 227. you’d recognized him from your class, much more interested in the pretty boy taking notes with his tongue stuck out than whatever war your professor would lecture about.

he was carrying some books, a pencil case that didn’t fully zip, and a five subject notebook. you watched him do his balancing act through the halls until his legs started to wobble. a knowing smile on your face, you tapped his shoulder. it was a gentle one so you didn’t scare him and make all his things fall over.

“can i carry something for you?” you laughed out and pushed one of your backpack straps up on your shoulder. peter only stared at you, his doe eyes prompting you to reach for his pencil case. “uh, no, it’s fine. i got it. see?” he proved that to you by hiking everything up in his arms. he gave you a smile of his own.

“are you sure? we’re going to the same place,” you’d checked again and pointed at his impressive pile. “i’m not gonna steal your sharpies.” “really, i’m fine,” peter insisted with a heart clenching chuckle. “you can have one, if you want,” he offered and attempted to unzip his case, one handed. you put your hand over his to stop him.

“wait until we get to class,” you let go of him, leaving the tips of peter’s ears a shade of pink you’d later fall in love with. “i’ll sit with you.”

peter was once determined to do things on his own, to be self-sufficient. it used to be something he was proud of. now, he’s completely incapable of holding his independence.

“we’re done, peter.” your tone is short, you getting to your feet. “you’d probably forget how to fucking breathe without me, but call it bossing around, i guess,” you laugh bitterly and go over to your drawers. peter’s face falls as he grabs your wrist, stopping you when you pass by him. “where are you going?”

no answer. you pull yourself out of his grasp with your lips pressed into a stern line. peter follows you step by step over to the dresser. “wait, wait. don’t leave, baby. please,” he begs you, getting onto his knees beside you. you’re pulling random clothes out as quick as you can. a science t-shirt peter outgrew is in your hands.

peter used to give you all his old clothes. the signature smell of his cologne lingered no matter how many times you washed them. they kept you calm on nights he was out late patrolling or away on missions. peter would sport a smirk whenever you wore them out in public, pulling you closer to him and complimenting the look.

it started when he was packing for his first mission since you two had begun living together. he’d realized he became too buff to fit in some shirts. remembering how many times you’d giggle at their funny sayings, peter gave them to you. you threw one on and thanked him with a peck on the cheek. it became your tradition.

peter would set off for a new continent, but a piece of him would stay home with you.

the stretched out hoodies and ripped sweatpants just sit in your drawer now. another meaningful thing discontinued. whatever he doesn’t want goes to may for donations now. the memory of what they used to mean to you makes a fit of rage burst through you.

you slam down his ‘find x’ shirt in the space between his knees and yours. you’re on a mission of your own this time. you aren’t going anywhere until you get rid of all the stuff that went from him to you.

“y/n, don’t do this. i- i love you. i love you.” peter chokes out, tears filling his eyes. his vision is clouded while you toss more clothes to your side. “i love you, y/n/n,” he whimpers again, and this time you briskly push the drawer shut. the whole dresser shakes. this is the most emotion either of you have shown in the past few months of your relationship. it’s a little too late.

“love is more than a word, peter. you have to back it up with actions.” you’re doing your best not to cry. the memories of how loved peter made you feel play in your mind. he briefly wipes under his eyes and shakes his head. he’s so oblivious. “i thought i- i did.” “exactly, you did. you gave up at some point.” your voice gets weaker as a tear drips down your chin.

you didn’t plan on breaking down when you imagined this moment. part of you wishes you could give him another chance. most of you knows it wouldn’t do any good for you or peter. you’re not right for each other anymore. he outgrew some sweatshirts, you outgrew him.

that takes you all the way back to it’s not you, it’s me. it’s really both of you.

for the last time, you pull peter in for a hug. the two of you need this. he loops his arms around your back, keeping them loose around you as he tucks his face into the side of your neck. you’re a mix of tears and sharp breaths with your chin on his shoulder. you bring a hand up to the back of his head, grabbing a fistful of curls.

he sobs right into your ear, effectively destroying whatever composure you had left.

even though you’re not in love with peter, you haven’t stopped loving him. somewhere inside of him is the goofy boy who asked you out on a post-it during class. the kindhearted man who gave so much of himself to the world and saved enough for you. the one whose fingertips left goosebumps on your skin with every touch.

seeing him like this, having caused it feels like a dull pain rippling in every part of your body. you’ve been there to soothe him during countless breakdowns over the years. you managed to stay strong for all of them. this is the only exception. he lost people, felt down about life, made mistakes. you were there to pick up each piece and put them back together.

the one mistake peter made that you can’t fix is not loving you right. you became his rock, his anchor whenever he let grief and sadness rule over him. you’d get him back to himself. he could’ve at least bought you flowers once in a while, or done anything that showed his gratitude. every iteration of awful put together isn’t enough to describe how he feels.

“i’m so- i’m so fucking sorry, baby. i don’t deserve you. i never have,” peter murmurs as he cries, wetting your skin that his face is still pressed into. your fingers pull roughly at his hair. hot tears overflow from your own eyes. “i should’ve done more.” his voice cracks on the last word. “that’s all i wanted to hear, pete,” you breathe out and pull away from him.

“does that mean you’ll stay?” he croaks, arms still wound around your body. his eyes are hopeful when they lock with yours. a frown pulls at your lips. “only for tonight. i should... one of us should sleep on the couch.” “oh,” his voice is gravelly, so he clears his throat. “i’ll do it.” you’re not going to fight him on it for once.

peter removes his arms from your waist, you sitting back down on your thighs. you give him a blink and you’ll miss it smile because you can’t keep one for long. it’s to let him know you’re not mad. you were at the start of this conversation, then he took accountability. you also came to terms with the fact that the downfall of your relationship was a joined effort.

there are more factors than peter not giving you what he should have. time, different goals, new outlooks on life. you can’t hate only him because a whole bunch of things lead to this.

instead of a smile, since he physically can’t put one on his splotchy face, peter brushes the pad of his thumb over the corner of your lips. he gets up to leave the room, but you stop him with a “wait!” he freezes in front of you. you get out a hoodie from his pile of old clothes and stand up. “it’s cold.” you put it in his hands, earning a grin that he didn’t think was possible.

“thanks, y/n,” peter sighs and holds the hoodie against his chest. “goodnight. um,” this is the part where he’d usually say i love you. “sleep well, okay?” the replacement stings for both of you. you’ll have to learn to fall asleep without hearing that phrase first. as much as you didn’t feel it anymore, you’d become used to it. “you too, peter. night,” you say softly.

you head back to your bed while peter walks out the door. he glances at you once, and you’re already settling under the covers. he shuts the door behind him before finding his way to the couch.

your bed has always seemed too small. it’s gigantic without peter. you aren’t sure how you feel about that yet.

peter lays across the couch, the hood that doesn’t quite fit him pulled over his head. he’s only wearing it because you gave it to him. you doing that not even five minutes ago was how you backed up your love with actions. it’s so easy. silent tears spill from his eyes at the realization.

he wishes on every star that he could’ve figured out he wasn’t doing enough sooner. you’d be together right now, had he just caught on. there was a time he prided himself on knowing you fully and completely. how to turn you into the shy one with certain combinations of words, what your schedule was each week so he could plan his free time around it.

your relationship became something he thought would last unconditionally. if only he was able pinpoint the exact moment he went wrong.

you’re right in the other room. he can go in there and bawl, plead for you to take him back. how could he do that and claim to love you, though? you’ve made it clear you‘re over him.

the best way for peter to show you he loves you is by letting you live your life, without him in it.

-

you don’t see peter again for weeks. he moved back in with may, and you got to keep the apartment. you were the one who took all the care of it, anyway.

your semester ended at the perfect time because peter isn’t in any of your new classes. the city is too big to bump into each other. you’re free from the hold he had on you, which would’ve been four years long since yesterday. you’ve been good at picking up his broken pieces for too long, and now it’s time to pick up your own.

for all the hangouts you missed on his behalf, you made up for it. you called mj the day after your breakup and met for lunch. she never explicitly said it, but she took your side. peter had a feeling because when he had the same idea as you, to lean on his friends for support, she never reached out.

betty is indifferent, ned stays cordial with you. his real loyalty is to peter. you can’t blame him.

peter hasn’t been doing well since you broke up. he’s not eating enough, he can’t focus on work of any kind. you were right when you said he would forget how to breathe without you. he often wonders how you’ve been.

he finds out today.

you’re walking around campus, heading in the direction peter just came from. he has a class in the building your last one was. the two of you are on the same sidewalk, opposite sides. he almost doesn’t recognize you.

mj is on one side of you, a guy he’s never seen before with an arm around your shoulders. you’re all laughing about whatever dumb thing your professor said during the lecture. your hair, which is done in a new style, flows behind you in the spring breeze. a smile takes place on your glossy lips. the smile is directed towards that guy. your new boyfriend, peter assumes.

you look amazing, and not only physically. you seem happy with your small group of people. peter hadn’t been able to give you that happiness in years, so it’s nice to see you got it back somehow.

he must have stared too long because you notice him. you fall behind mj and your potential boyfriend, both of them wrapped up in discussing your next project. peter stops walking. you do the same. he’s not sure if he upset you, or what’s going on. his instincts tell him to apologize. his mouth stays closed.

that infectious smile of yours appears once again. you thought about peter yesterday, it being your anniversary and all. you’d only let yourself remember the good things. they outweighed the bad ones when you look back on everything.

“aye, grandma! get over here!” mj calls to you, your boyfriend nudging her side. “take your time, y/n/n. i’m not in a rush to write seven long ass pages.” you laugh to yourself at the two of them. peter fiddles with the zipper on his jacket. it’s from the drawer of things you used to wear. “one sec!” you yell back.

“hey,” you turn to face peter, who’s giving you a tight lipped smile. “how’ve you been?” “i’m okay. just, you know,” he shrugs and clasps his hands behind his back. there’s a short silence before peter says, “you seem good. really good.” he smiles for real this time. “yeah, i am. i hope you are, too,” you tell him and genuinely mean it.

you’d like to catch up soon, but it’s not right yet. you both need more time. “i’ll see you around?” you’re already starting to walk, backwards so you can see peter. “uh, sure. bye,” he gives you a quick wave and continues on his way.

you get back to mj and your boyfriend, his arm returning to your shoulders. they waited for you by the stoplight. “what’d ya get up to over there?” he teases, mj suspiciously watching your face for any tells. you carefully think through your answer with a grin. “love.”

[kpop-dungeon-dark]

His Little Princess. (Nerd!Hyunjin x You)

•TRIGGER WARNING•

Warning(s): Non-Con, humiliation, punishment, degradation, kidnapping. Both of you are legal in this. Read at your own risk.

Hyunjin's hands were a little shaky as he stood in front of the busy table during break time, knowing it was the only time when he'd be able to approach her as their schedules clashed. Adjusting his round spectacles one more time, the boy turned his head to look at his friends at a table far away. The 8 boys gave him huge smiles and stuck their thumbs up at him, nodding at their friend as they silently encouraged him to go for it. Taking in a huge breath, Hyunjin turned to look forward again, taking the few remaining steps towards it.

"Y- Y/n…" His soft call went unnoticed as all the cool kids on the table continued to eat and enjoy their break. Looking back at his friends, he groaned inwardly but they shook their heads and warned him not to come back without asking her. Yes, it seemed easy in the heat of the moment but now… standing in front of all these people… even thinking of proposing her while she looked so pretty with her pink dyed hair… busy on her phone like this…

"Y- Y/n!" Hyunjin let out after standing there for 5 minutes. The whole table went silent as his heart started to thump anxiously. Okay snap. Maybe that was too loud. Everyone slowly started to quieten down, heads turning toward Hyunjin and just why was a nerdy loser like him calling someone as the pretty and beautiful Y/n like this so informally?

"U- Uh…" The girl who had averted her gaze from her phone sounded, raising an eyebrow because she remembered him from one of her classes last year. Maybe…? She wasn't even sure if she'd even seen him before.

"I- I was wondering…" Biting the inside of his cheek, Hyunjin gave himself a whole mental peptalk, feeling like his heart was about to burst from all this attention on him. Come on. It wasn't this hard… right? He'd prepared for like two weeks now. Ever since senior prom was announced. It was his last prom. Last year's had been terrible too. It was now or never. "I was wo-ndering i- if you c- could come with m- me t- to senior p- prom-" before he could finish his sentence, some people on her table started chuckling.

"Wooooooh! Is our very own Y/n getting asked out right now?!" A girl bitchily laughed while clapping, causing the girl in question to bite her lip, cheeks flushing.

Fuck. Why couldn't he have just slid in a letter or something like the rest of her admirers? Was embarrassing her like this in the cafeteria necessary?

"I cannot believe this nerd just asked Y/n out!" A guy shook his head before the whole cafeteria started to buzz with whispers.

"Hey boy!" Hyunjin fell to the floor when a muscular guy from the table, who always followed Y/n around like a dog, suddenly got up, pissed. "Get the fuck back! Why're you embarrassing her?!" Grabbing a carton of juice her angrily splashed it at Hyunjin's face. "Is this your little attempt at making her a laughing stock or what?! You know damn well people like her don't go with people like us!"

Everyone started laughing at Hyunjin, pointing at him while ridiculing him, causing tears to form under his juice covered spectacles, only getting further ruined when a girl from the table tossed her lunch on him. But none of that humiliation could have broken his heart as much as when Y/n got up without sparing him another glance, picking her bag up before leaving the cafeteria in anger and embarrassment.

.

"Who the fuck does that girl think she is?" Minho spat in pure hatred as Hyunjin finally went to sleep in his room, the rest of the boys now downstairs in his living room. "I knew she was a self proclaimed Princess and all but this?!" It was already really hard to impress the boy and this had angered him.

They had scooped a crying and heartbroken Hyunjin up from the cafeteria, the muscular guy insulting them as well as he 'advised' them to bring Hyunjin off his little cloud. Then they'd brought the boy home on short leave before forcing him to shower and then he just shut off, collapsing on the bed before going to sleep.

"These popular people are ruthless…" Changbin sighed, tiredly relaxing on the couch.

"They're nobody's. Changing groups is nothing to them. Friends don't mean anything to them neither do feelings. If you're popular, they're your friend. But if you're not, you don't matter as a person." Chan shook his head in distaste, all of them hurt for their friend.

"You're right." Jeongin agreed.

"Guys…" Seungmin, who was the only one that hadn't spoken until now ever since the incident sounded, raising his head. "I… have a plan."

.

Y/n slowly raised to consciousness, blinking and groaning when she didn't recognize her surroundings, feeling a painful bound around her wrists as her ankles burned too. "W- What the…" She tried to speak, blinking as the girl tried to recall her recent memories, gasping once she remembered. Oh yes. She was in the parking lot of the school, walking to her car when she felt someone grab her from behind before a wet, funny smelling towel was pressed to her mouth.

"I- Is someone h- here…?" She whispered, throat painfully dry. "Hello…?" Her voice broke. "H- Help! Someone… h- help!" Y/n's body slowly started to fill with panic as she tried to struggle, realising that she was in a basement, placed on a chair whilst her hands were cuffed and legs were tied to a damn spreaderbar.

"Nobody will help you so I suggest you stop that pathetic little screaming already, Princess." Felix spoke as him and all the boys except Hyunjin entered he basement, smirking at her panicked state.

"Oh look who's awake!" Changbin ridiculed with a mocking smile.

"Tsk. Do you even deserve the 'help' that you oh so desperately want?" Han was disgusted with her as he glared at her.

"Y- YOU- WHO ARE YOU?! WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!" Y/n yelled at them, trying to break out of her restraints pathetically, trying to recognise them before realising in despair that she didn't know any of these nerves. "LET ME GO! OR YOU'LL GO TO JAIL- AHHH!" The males laughed at her when she fell off the chair, falling on her face as her skirt flew up.

"We will go to jail?!" Woojin raised an eyebrow as he crouched in front of her. "When disgusting whores like you get to roam around freely?!" Pulling his hand back, the boy slapped her across the face, making her cry out.

"Uhuhuh~" Chan shook his head as he sat on the chair and pulled her back by the spreader bar. "Now, now, Woojin. Little girls shouldn't be hit like that." Before the stronger one of them all picked the girl up by the spreader bar, all of them laughing at the humiliating sight since her skirt was up all the way. "This is how brats are supposed to be handled." Laying her over his knees, Chan landed a smack on Y/n's ass, making her legs kick in pain as she tried to struggle but it was literally impossible.

"Do you think you even deserve to struggle?! After you've been so disgusting and rightfully deserving of this punishment?!" Minho slapped her jiggling ass now, not one of them willing to get effected even though she was a living breathing female with a gorgeous body and they were all inexperienced virgins. Why? Because she was Hyunjin's.

His little Princess.

"O- OKAY PLEASE S- STOP! PLEASE! I WON'T TELL THE COPS! JUST STOP! PLEASE!" The girl started begging now, making them chuckle at her, the rest landing smacks on her ass now as Chan manhandled her struggle, not allowing her to move one bit. "P- PLEASE! O- OUCH!"

"You popular people are so pathetic. Acting all mighty but actually not capable of anything." Jeongin shook his head in disdain.

"Oh it's not just that reason but one of the many behind these popular kids being pathetic!" Han smacked the back of her head, enjoying how she shook under them.

"Hyunjin better punish her well! Tsk! He was just trying to ask you on a date! With all due respect!" Changbin pulled at her hair.

"And you treated her like he disrespected you or something." Seungmin shook his head in disgust.

"How do you like it now, huh?" Felix suddenly splashed ice cold water on her face, causing her to cry out as he ignored her begs, a cold expression on his face.

The boys were ignoring her constant pleads and cries, laughing and spanking her before a voice came from upstairs, a shadow forming on the stairs. "... Guys?" It had been 2 days since the whole incident, Hyunjin was slowly recovering. "W- What are you doin-" the boy's eyes widened as he moved further down, his legs going shaky at the sight before him.

"I- Is that… WHAT THE HECK?!" Rushing the rest of the way to Chan, Hyunjin crouched down in front of him, moving the weeping girl's hair out of the way. "IS T- THAT Y/-" gasping loudly, the boy looked around at his friends, getting angry at the sight of her red face with her skirt resting on her back, limbs tied up tightly. "WHAT ARE YOU-- LET HER GO!" Getting up on his feet, he tried to fight Chan, being pushed back by Han and Changbin as he tried to reach Y/n.

"Don't you remember how you were insulted for literally only trying to ask the girl you like out?!" Felix yelled over the commotion he was making with Han and Changbin.

"We are not your enemies!" Han panted heavily, having a hard time pushing the bigger boy back.

"They dumped food on you! Pushed you to the ground! Made fun of you! The whole cafeteria laughed at you!" Minho added in to the fire, frustrated from how fucking whipped their friend pathetically was.

"B- But that's n- not Y/n's f- fault!" Hyunjin wavered, biting his lip as his heart started thumping.

"Yes it fucking is!" Seungmin shot at him. "You think anyone would have dared done anything had she not done that pathetic cute little act before walking out on her Princess heals like that?" Hyunjin blinked at them and then at her struggling and crying form, his fresh wounds cutting open once again as he remembered all of it. Pushing Han and Changbin away, the boy walked closer to her now, crouching in front of Chan as he tucked some of her hair behind her ear.

"H- HYUNJIN PLEASE! PLEASE! I DIDN'T EVEN SAY ANYTHING! I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING! PLEASE!" His heart flurttered from how his name rolled off her tongue, throat getting dry. Oh how he'd wished to hear her say his name.

"Yes, you did." Reaching for her ass, Hyunjin placed his shaking and sweaty hand over it, feeling it up before he groped it, instantly getting hard. "Yes, you did. You allowed them to treat me like that." Y/n was shaking her head repeatedly and he grew frustrated, slapping her already spanked cheek. "Don't lie… baby. I fucking hate it when people do that."

Getting up, he started undoing his belt before he could stop himself, pulling it out the hoops before doubling it and bringing it to her ass, feeling a strange kind of satisfaction from her cry of pain. "All I asked was a question. I never stepped past my boundaries…" Going for her beautiful sit spots now, Hyunjin forced himself to not drool before he made her scream again. "And you had them humiliate me like that as if I did something disrespectful… tsk…" Y/n was shaking in Chan's hold as she hysterically cried from the pain, shock and terror. "And now I have no choice but to humiliate you back, huh?"

"Exactly, good little girls don't behave like that at all." Jeongin shook his head, making Hyunjin look up at all of them, a new kind of darkness in his eyes.

"Get out." That was enough to make them all empty the basement of his house as his parents were never home, taking Y/n from Chan before he followed others and closed the door behind them. "Had you not done that disgusting little act, you wouldn't have been humiliated like this, baby." The girl trembled as he sat in the chair, throwing the belt away.

"H- Hyunjin, p- please… I am sorry…"

"Sorry doesn't cut it, I am afraid, darling." Affectionately brushing her hair out of her pretty face, Hyunjin admired her beautiful features that were currently swollen and red, pressing his lips to her nose. "Not when you're looking so beautiful like this with your ass tight in this lace underwear, baby." The girl felt a shudder go down his spine as he caressed and groped her ass to soothe the pain. "I hope you didn't let them see too much, huh? You're all mine."

Y/n let out a weak little whimper when he placed her on the ground, spreading the bar which forcefully held her legs open, causing him to get even more hard from the sight. "I wasn't planning this, Princess. But now that you're here…" Hyunjin's voice was dangerously low as he opened his pants, hurriedly tugging them down along his boxers and allowing his hard cock go spring out.

"W- Wait!" The girl tried to look behind her as she was on her chest. "What are you d- doing?!" Her time was alert and alarmed, breaths heavy.

"What am I doing?" Raising an eyebrow, Hyunjin wiped the sweat off his forehead and pushed his hair back that was heavily sweating, adjusting his spectacles as he crouched behind her. "What do you fucking think?" As Y/n slowly realised what was about to take place, her struggles became frequent and loud once again, begging him to stop. "Tsk… sorry but I don't listen to nasty little whores. I bet you're not even a virgin despite barely being 18, huh?" Grabbing her panties, Hyunjin ripped them off, leaning down to kiss and lick at her bruised ass, the marks caused by his belt and his friends -which he wasn't so happy about- making his cock twitch as the tip grazed against the soft skin of her sitspots, causing the girl to shudder.

"H- Hyunji--"

"Just shut up already, Y/n-ah…" His fingers started to graze against her squishy pussy lips that were leaking. "You're leaking so much… Tsk… is it one of your fetishes? Being punished by your… owner and his friends? Was that maybe why you overacted so much on the situation? Purposefully acting out… perhaps?" The girl could only pathetically cry in response, hating how his finger pushed in her pussy lips, the spreader bar forcing her to open up as his index finger slowly rubbed her up and down.

"So what if a… nerd likes a popular girl? Must it be so complicated? Must it always be so fucking stereotypical? Why? Are we not humans?" His nail prodded against her opening slowly that he wasn't honestly sure was even her opening, looking down to make sure he wasn't doing anything wrong, his only knowledge all the porn he'd watched. "Why am I treated like trash, huh?" A gasp left Y/n when his finger suddenly slid in her cunt, slowly pumping up and down. "Just because I wear spectacles for my bad eyesight and am good at studying? Is that so bad, huh?!"

"N- No! No! Please!"

"Yes… yes…" Hyunjin slowly spoke, rage filling him now as he smacked her ass with his free hand again, continuing to finger her. "That's exactly what it is. I am trash because I am better than you, right? You popular kids are nothing but pathetic little disgusting insecure jealous shits." Adding another finger inside her, Hyunjin scissored her walls and prepared her for his surprisingly big cock.

"And do you know what should happen to disgusting little kids like you?" Gripping his cock with one hand, the boy started to piss on her red ass, making it burn before he pulled his fingers out of her, getting her shirt out of the way and spraying some on her back too, making her squeal loudly in disgust, trying to get away. "They should know their place and be kept in it. All of you should have an owner like me to make you learn."

Shaking his head at her crying, the male pushed his still leaking length in her hole, moaning and grunting at how tight but pleasurable it really was, spreading the bar to it's highest limit before gripping her thighs, his lips falling open at how good it felt. "N- No!" Hyunjin grunted and turned her around on his cock. "I want to see you as I fuck into you and claim you! You're all mine!"

Starting to fuck her hard and rough, the boy reached over and kissed her swells, using one of his hands to rip her bra off. "Fuck…" Hyunjin couldn't believe the beautiful sight before him. "You're so beautiful, Y/n…" He complemented, genuinely affectionate. "Truly… both up here" he finally kissed her lips, moaning at the taste of her raspberry chapstick. "And down here" the boy kissed both of her adorable little fat tits, licking at the nipple and giggling when they hardened. "It really happens in real life!" He excitedly remarked, twitching inside her, already close from all that he got to see.

"I am lucky I have friends that care for me" his hips were moving at a quick pace, Hyunjin's cock bulging against the skin of her stomach, it's shape and movement easy to make out as he used her as a literal sock. "Because I was planning to give up on you. The last 3 days have been so hard. I was starting to believe that maybe there really was no way. That maybe all pretty and popular girls have to go to the cocky muscular jerk that just plays them, makes them cry. Maybe guys like me are always nothing but a mat for Princess' to wipe their feet on." He couldn't help but softly smack her face, pulling at her hair before biting down at her neck to leave marks.

"H- Hyunjin… p- please sto-"

The boy sighed in disappointment at her whisper, shaking his head before pinching her nipple and kissing her again. "No, baby. No. You'll be good and behave. If you don't behave, I promise this will go on and on. There is no way out of this unless you act good. Like a good little Princess." Kissing her lips again, Hyunjin finally managed to push his balls in, collapsing against her as his own sweat fell on the glass of his spectacles. "M- My little Princess. I've always liked you in silence. Ever since Kindergarten. But I won't anymore. You will be mine now that we are of age."

Y/n could only shudder as she felt him cum deep inside her, kissing her lips again as he went motionless, holding her as tight to himself as he could.

It went on for another two hours, Hyunjin losing a track of just how many times he came deep inside her, fucking her in unconsciousness too as she helplessly dozed off and woke up again before she agreed. She will be a good girl. For him.

That was the only way.

.

Y/n didn't really go to school after that incident, the prom approaching just 3 days later. "You look absolutely stunning, Princess." Hyunjin's voice rang in his bedroom and from behind Y/n as she stared at herself in the mirror.

"Ehhh~ s- stop…" The girl whimpered out, blushing as she lowered her head and turned around, slowly reaching him before she nuzzled her face in arm shyly, not even looking at him. "I- I don't."

"Yes, you do" the boy's eyebrows furrowed as he softly grasped her wrist, tightening his hold on it possessively. "You're the prettiest Princess to ever exist. And you look so beautiful in this moment that my heart might just stop" gripping her ass that was locked in a chastity, Hyunjin pulled her closer, growling lowly before he gripped her chin and forcefully kissed her.

"I- I love how I c- can be at my utmost c- comfort with you…" She whispered, so glad that she was in a comfortable dress that she liked and not a high-end extremely revealing dress that she didn't even like deep down but wore it for the name and price, being uncomfortable in it the whole time. Before her eyebrows furrowed because he wasn't wearing his spectacles.

Her pussy shivered from just how Hyunjin kept her in her little place as well.

"That is a normal feeling for those surrounded by people that actually care for them and not their status, Angel." Y/n sighed and nodded slowly, knowing he was right. She knew her friends were fake and bitched behind her back. Of course she did. "Now…" He heavily sighed and moved past her and towards the dressing table. "Let's get those uncomfortable and irritating contacts in."

Y/n quickly reached him, stopping his hand from grabbing the container before she reached for his spectacles resting not so far away, unfolding them before resting them on his nose and pushing them up. "Must the nerd always change for the girl he likes?" A bright smile made its way on his face at her words, chucking deeply before he nodded and kissed her forehead appreciatively. "What you did was wrong but I was no good either. Thank you, Hyunjin. Please always keep me as your little Princess. It's the only time I wanna be a Princess honestly."

His heart was fluttering. "That is the only thing you were born to be, Angel." She giggled at his words before stopping, realising that he was serious and gulping at his serious expression.

"Y- Yes, Hyunjin…" She felt so damn small. Fuck. Fiddling with jacket, Y/n sneakily looked up at the handsome boy. "I- I've been g- good, right Hyunjin?"

His hands toyed with her ass as he swayed them side by side slowly. "Hmm…?"

"T- Then… w- will you please m- make me feel g- good?" Her locked pussy was leaking.

A deep chuckle left him. "Hmm. Maybe?" When the girl whined and pouted softly, Hyungjin gripped her hair and pulled her face closer before kissing her deeply. "Behave tonight and I'll consider, alright?" Before both of them left to prom.

.

[bruhstories]

Fate

Summary: The Abduction of Persephone or how Levi couldn’t get you of his head.

Pairing: Hades!Levi x Persephone!Reader

Warnings & Content: nsfw, mentions of rape & incest (cause, you know, Zeus is a fucking entitled asshole and nobody fucking likes him), unprotected sex, oral sex (male receiving), fingering, language, loss of virginity

Word Count: 5.1 k

A/N: literally the only thing I have to say is that for the purpose of this fic, Hanji has she/her pronouns, and the first few paragraphs are written in third person xD happy reading!

Help me...

Please...

Help... me...

Sweat drips from his forehead and his eyes shoot open. That damned dream again. That sweet voice again. Levi Hades can't comprehend why he was dreaming. Gods don'tdream. His bed seems empty, but he never needed anyone in it. For some reason, now he feels like someone is missing. He gets up, naked body and blank eyes watching over his realm from the balcony of his castle. Empty. Other than the souls of the dead that quietly dance around like little flames, it's empty. Other than Cerberus sleeping peacefully, it's empty. And so damn cold. Mortals mistaken the Underworld for a scorching hot place, but in reality, it's as cold as Levi Hades' heart. If he even has a heart.

He wraps his toga around his sculpted body, a wreath of laurels on his coal-black hair, donning his arms with silver bracelets and rings. Time doesn't exist in the world of the dead, but Levi Hades sticks to a strict schedule. He waves his hand and a scroll and quill magically appear on his marble desk. He can't trust Hermes with this message, and so he gives it to one of his dogs to deliver it to Hanji Hecate. Who better to interpret the meaning of his dream than the goddess of witchcraft herself? LeviHades surrounds himself in thick, grey smoke before he disappears from his bedroom.

Somewhere on Earth, Y/N Persephone is being watched by Zeus. The powerful god cannot resist such a beauty, and he is known for having his way with anyone, even his own daughter. But it's not her time, he thinks, not just yet. She knows this, she knows what will happen to her when she reaches the age of marriage, and at night, when not a soul is awake, she sobs and prays that someone will find her and help her. She is willing to do anything to escape her father's clutches and her dark future. And every night she cries, it rains — it pours.

At the outskirts of the Underworld, Hanji Hecate receives a message. She reads it carefully, and a knot forms in her stomach. The goddess heard the pleas of a girl, whom she believed to be a mortal, but if Levi Hades heard her, too, then it could only be another deity. HanjiHecate closes her eyes and performs a spell in the hopes of locating the desperate girl. It doesn't work. It doesn't work because, unbeknownst to her, Demeter is hiding her daughter from the preying eyes of Zeus.

They searched for weeks, mortal weeks, for the crying goddess, but none of them had any luck. Y/N Persephone is somewhere in the shadows of Demeter, but even she knows her mother can't protect her forever. Zeus gets what Zeus wants eventually. The sun rises over the meadow, but Y/N Persephone doesn't know that because she's stuck weaving in a cave, sweat dripping down her forehead, hairs sticking to her face. The drakons Demeter placed at the entrance of the cave followed Y/N Persephone outside, guarding her as she washes herself in a nearby stream. He isn't supposed to be there. Levi Hades isn't supposed to peer at her naked body and the way she splashes the crystal-clear water. He was supposed to meet with Hanji Hecate and take a walk. He was supposed to go back to the Underworld after that. Yet here he is, spellbound by her gestures, her face, her eyes. And then, she sings. Y/N Persephone begins to sing and all the flowers around him bloom. Levi Hades goes into a shocked state, eyes wide open, brows raised. He knows that voice. He knows it because he's been dreaming it. His scent is picked up by the drakons and he disappears, leaving behind a trail of smoke.

"I found her, Hecate. I found her, but I can't get close to her."

"What do you mean you found her? Just like that?" Hanji Hecate's fingers trace the bark of a tree.

"It was fate. It must be." Levi Hades is desperate now.

"Calm down, Hades. I've never seen you so... twitchy." She laughs, kneeling in the grass. The witch plays with some fallen leaves, brown hair flowing in the wind.

"That's because you didn't see what I did. She started singing and flowers bloomed! I don't know what kind of nymph she is, but she is beautiful. Nothing like I've ever seen before."

"Oh, I never thought I'd live to see the day Hades falls in love." Hanji Hecate laughs again. "So why didn't you approach her?"

"Tch, because she was surrounded by drakons. I don't understand why a mere nymph would need so much protection."

The goddess gasps, all traces of happiness gone from her face, replaced by disappointment and anxiety. Levi Hades takes notice of this and places his cold hand on the witch's shoulder, but she flinches.

"You can't have her."

"You knowher?" His voice is condescending, offended that his good friend hid something like this from him.

"Hades, she's Demeter's daughter, Persephone. She's not just some nymph, but the goddess of spring." Hanji Hecate brings her palms together, forming a triangle. "We can't talk here."

Levi Hades nods and lets himself transported to the Underworld, back to the familiar souls lingering in the air.

"Talk, Hecate." He is impatient and demanding, arms folded across his chest.

"Zeus wants her, and Demeter and I are keeping her hidden." The deity explains with pain in her voice.

"Yes, well, you're not doing a very good job, now, are you?"

"Oi, the drakons noticed you. You don't think they would notice Zeus?" She snaps back, traces of arrogance in her voice.

"Hecate... it's Zeus. What would stop that brat from turning into a drakon fool her?"

The goddess shivers, shifting her weight from side to side.

"Do you have a better idea?"

"I do, actually. I'll bring Persephone here." LeviHades proudly states, but his face is still blank, not once betraying his true feelings.

"You'll... what?" Her mouth is slightly open, bewildered by the god.

"It's the only place Zeus doesn't have access without an invitation. Face it, Hecate, it's a good plan. Better than yours, anyway."

Hanji Hecate is speechless, completely at a loss for words. She ponders over the idea, a hand brought to her chin to think better.

"Alright, but what makes you think she'll just stroll through the gates of the Underworld without a complaint?"

"Oh, you've mistaken my words. I'll forcefully bring her here." He tilts his head, a semblance of a smirk on his lips.

"For fuck's sake, Hades, she's not what you'd expect. And what about me? I promised Demeter I would protect her!" HanjiHecate throws her hands in the air, her shadow taking the form of a raging dog.

"Do notchallenge me, witch. You know I can destroy you in the blink of an eye." LeviHades growls and her shadow restores itself to its natural shape. "Besides, you would still protect her. The Underworld is where you abide."

She knows she shouldn't carelessly be out in the open one hour before her coming of age. But Y/N Persephone, with tears streaming down her beautiful face, embraced her future. She knows Zeus will come for her, and so she willingly gives herself to him. With poppy seeds, she put the drakons to sleep and left the cave, clad in a sheer toga, her body visible through the transparent fabric.

"If you want me, come and get me, father!" Y/N Persephone screams at the skies, the flora surrounding her slowly turning a dark shade of brown and dying, just like her innocence would die tonight. The earth shatters behind her, marigold flames and ashy smoke cracking open the soil. Shadowy figures emerge, grasping the young goddess' limbs and they drag her down, down, down to the Underworld. She is afraid, her heart beats faster as the moonlight disappears, and all she can see is darkness.

"I'm sorry I couldn't be gentler, but I didn't want Zeus to get the wrong idea."

"You're Hades, aren't you?"

"Yes, but please, call me Levi. Persephone, I presume." Levi doesn't smile, but his voice is warm, contrasting the cold that surrounded your body.

"Don't call me that." You spit back, confused as to why you were in his realm in the first place.

"You should be a little more grateful that I saved you, brat." He narrows his eyes down at you.

"Saved me? You abductedme. You're no better than him."

Hanji Hecate was right, you had fire in your soul, and an attitude that would drive Levi over the edge.

"Tch, don't compare me to that pretentious cock." The god scoffs and your expression softens.

"Zeus is a... cock? With a beak and feathers?" You giggle and he almost wants punch himself. How could he forget how innocent you are? Clearly, he's been spending too much time with Minthe.

"That's one way to put it."

"Is there another way?" You ask with your index finger brought to your lips, pure curiosity in your eyes.

"Forget that, you said you didn't want me to call you Persephone. How else should I address you?"

"Y/N." You tell him, eyes peering to the balcony of his castle and you skip to it. "Oh, this place is huge! What are those?" You point at the colourful flames dancing in the air.

"Souls." Levi joins you, resting his arms on the marble railing.

"They're beautiful!" You are in awe, and he is just as mesmerised by your beauty. Not one sane god or goddess would consider the souls of the dead beautiful.

"Look, Y/N, I heard you. In my dreams, I mean. I'm not going to hurt you, I brought you here to rescue you." He lies through his teeth. Levi did want to save you, he still does, but he can't deny the fact that he wanted you all to himself. "I'm gonna mind my own business, you mind yours. Try not to break anything. And don't, under any circumstances, make a mess out of my castle, or my realm."

You lean on the railing, nose scrunched and a hand on your hip.

"What am I supposed to do, then? And what about my mother? What about when spring comes and I have to bring it? What about Zeus?"

Levi grits his teeth, almost regretting his decision of saving you.

"Tch, I'll deal with Demeter. I'll tell Zeus I'm marrying you. You can go bring spring when it's due. Happy?" He pinches the bridge of his nose.

"And you won't taint my innocence?"

Oh, he will taint it, alright. But not just yet.

"I won't do anything you don't want me to do."

"You still didn't answer my first question. What am I supposed to do?" You shift your weight from one leg to the other, impatiently waiting for a proper answer from your captor.

"Anything you want, just don't get in my way when I'm dealing with the dead."

"You're an aggressive little man, you know that?"

Levi can feel a blood vessel bursting on his forehead. You were truly annoying, but he couldn't just sit around and wait for Zeus to have his way with you.

"Anyway, I suppose it is safer to be here." You rolled your eyes. "Got any books?"

"What, you read?" He snorts, a condescending brow arched.

"Don't patronise me. You're the one who abducted me, you could at least try to be nice to me."

Levi sighs. This wasn't how he imagined things would go. He imagined you'd make the perfect housewife and keep him some company.

"First floor. Just stay out of the restricted section."

"Why?"

"Because I said so. Zeus' beard, are you always this irritating?"

"Are you?" You chuckle, a hand hiding your smile.

With another sigh, Levi disappears, leaving you alone. "Great job, Y/N, you made the only person who took a crumb of pity on you to go away." You say to yourself, a pout on your lips.

The Underworld wasn't as bad as you thought. Sure, there was the occasional fire popping from the ground here and there, and you had to be careful not to burn yourself, but overall, it was serene. Some parts of it were scorching hot, but mostly it was cold, and you always brought an extra cloak with you when exploring the realm. Levi wasn't always with you, in fact you haven't seen him in days, but you met his three-headed puppy. Well, puppy wasn't the best word to describe the creature, and it did try to eat you the first time, but you stood your ground and tamed the beast with your singing and eager belly rubs.

"This is a sight I never thought I'd live to see." Levi is shocked, watching his raging dog so calm. "Cerberus never lets anyone but me touch him." He gives the dog a few pats on his back.

"Well, Cerberus likes me better, don't you? Who's a good boy? You are, yes, you are!" You kiss all three muzzles and hug the gigantic beast, the heat of its fuzzy body warming you up.

"Oi, don't get ahead of yourself. Come here, Cerberus." Levi extends his arms and the creature is confused. "I said, come here."

The dog stops wagging its tail and plops next to you with a groan, one head resting in your arms. The shit-eating grin on your face is enough to make Levi sigh.

"See? I told you he likes me better." You poke your tongue out in triumph. You wave your hands and the god watches how you place three daffodil wreaths on each of Cerberus' heads. "Much better!"

"Y/N, he looks silly."

"No, he looks adorable! Here, I made you one, too."

Levi takes the flower crown and inspects it, careful not to crumble the petals.

"What is this?" He asks, marvelling at the beauty of the ice-blue colour of the plant.

"Uh, a flower crown?"

"Yeah, no shit. I meant what flower is this?"

"Oh, it's a blue poppy. One of the rarest plants in the world." You smile. "I think it suits you."

"You're an oddball."

You sit in a lavish chair, all kinds of foods displayed on the table in front of you. Saliva pools in your mouth, but you decide to wait for Levi anyway. It's bad manners to start eating without the host, Demeter taught you that. Gods and goddess don't eat mortal foods, but sometimes they indulge in it, and tonight was one of those nights.

"Here, try this." Levi offers you a strange fruit, something humans have on earth, but different.

"What is it?" You poke your finger at the juicy fruit, sucking the sweetness from your digit.

"It's a pomegranate that only grows in the Underworld."

You pick at the seeds, popping one in your mouth. You couldn't believe something so good could grow in a cold place like this.

"So, what's the occasion?" You ask Levi as you eat three more seeds, the crimson juice staining your lips.

"Our wedding."

You accidentally swallow, choking on saliva and the pomegranate seeds, your fist hammering your chest as you gasp for air.

"What?"

"I told Zeus I'm marrying you and now he wants proof." Levi bluntly states, a chalice of nectar in his hand.

"No."

"You don't have a choice, unfortunately."

"But… I'm supposed to be a virgin. Marriage implies consumption of it." You slam your fists on the table. "My mother-"

"Your mother lied to you. You're a goddess of fertility for fuck's sake." He shrugs and you're shocked by how chilling his voice sounds. Sure, Levi was always brooding and silent, but now he was just inconsiderate. "However, I'm not a man who breaks his promises. I told you I won't do anything you don't want me to."

"Oh, how niceof you. I'm leaving." You stand up, pushing the chair away.

"And go where? Demeter can't protect you forever, and you don't stand a chance against Zeus."

"You know why I hate my name so much, Levi?" You growl, fingernails digging into the wooden table.

"Do, tell."

"Because it means destruction. A fitting name for a goddess of ‘fertility’, don't you think?" The table splits open and all the plates fall to the ground. Your normal, bubbly aura changes suddenly and there's a hint of red in your Y/E/C eyes. "You think I don't stand a chance against Zeus? I'm his offspring." You snap, and instead of flowers falling out of your hair, there's thorns, spikes and rusty leaves all over the place. The uglies, most poisonous plants sprout from the ground and you're no longer the goddess of spring, but the bringer of slaughter, and Levi is impressed. Now he really knows it was faith that brought you together, he knows your place is with him — with the dead.

"Marry me." He says, unmoved by your little show. Unmoved on the outside, because on the inside he wants to bend you over and fuck you silly. His words shouldfuel your rage, but you're too surprised by the fact that he still wants to marry you, despite your outburst.

"Why? Because Zeus wants that?" Vines protrude from your skin and your fingernails turn black. You were completely different than the helpless little girl he rescued that night. You were terrifying. But not to Levi — to him you were fascinating.

"Because I want that."

It was safe to say you had fallen in love with Levi in those nine months since you came to the Underworld. He accepted you the way you were, he accepted your darkness, something not even your mother could do, and that's what triggered your feelings for the god of the dead. You still didn't allow him to call you Persephone, because you still hadn't fully embraced that part of you. Spring was almost due, but you promised Levi you'd go to earth after your wedding. Everyone would be there, including Demeter, which you haven't seen in a long time.

A soft knock interrupts your thoughts.

"Y/N, are you ready?"

"In a second, Hanji!"

"Oh, thank the gods for calling me that. I keep telling everyone I'm tired of Hecate but they don't care." The witch scoffs from the other side of the door.

"Has my mother arrived?" You ask, concern visible in your voice.

"Yes. And she's not happy."

"Hey," you open the door, "thanks for taking the blame and explaining things to her." You hug the goddess and she holds you tight.

"Don't worry about it, kid. It's me who should thank you. I don't know what you did to Levi, but he seems happier. He won't show it because he's a prick, but I can feel it."

You flash Hanji a genuine smile and ask her to fix your veil, to which she gladly accepts before escorting you to the castle grounds. Your mother should do this, but she hated her future groom, or your father, but he was a sick man who only decided to leave you alone because he respected Levi.

Every god and goddess of Olympus is here, even your uncle Poseidon. You emerge from the castle, arm looped around Hanji's and you smirk at Levi's shock. He never thought you could be more beautiful, yet here you are, dressed in silk, flowers on your hand and a thin veil clinging from the peony crown on your head. You catch a glimpse of Demeter before drifting your eyes to your future husband.

"Ladies and gentlemen, gods and goddesses, we have gathered here today to witness and bless the union between Levi, god of the Underworld, and Y/N, goddess of spring." Hanji proudly declares. The ceremony doesn't last too long, and when Levi's lips crush yours in what is your first kiss, thousands upon thousands of plants sprout from the soil, colourful flowers blooming and letting out the sweetest smells known to mankind. Love, he thinks, that's what love smells like.

You're tired from the party, tired from all the talking and mingling, tired from your mother's lecture, and tired from avoiding your father. At least Hera was nice enough to wish you a happy marriage. You pace around your bedroom, sitting on the bed, then standing up again. Levi went to his chamber after the party, but you were expecting, no, you wanted to consume the marriage. You walk to his room, a toga lazily draped over your shoulders, and open the door without a single knock. He's in bed, the only light source being the colourful souls levitating outside his windows. You carefully push the covers and climb into the bed, gently scooching closer to him.

"Psst, husband, are you sleeping?" You poke his shoulder.

"Tch, not anymore." He sighs, not bothering to open his eyes and look at you. "What do you want?"

"Well, I'm glad you asked! Seeing as we're married now, I thought it's only natural for a wife to sleep with her husband." You roll on your side, propping yourself on your elbow. Tentatively, you tug on the fabric of the toga, exposing your shoulders and part of your breasts.

"So sleep." Levi finally lolls his head to the side, facing you. He did not expect to see you sprawled on his bed like that, in a lewd position and a playful smile on your soft lips. "You don't have to do this just because we're married.

"I'm doing it because I want to. And I know you want it, too, Levi." You purr, your fingers grazing over your collarbone.

"It's going to hurt." He warns you, but his hand is already on your thigh.

"I know. But you'll take good care of me, won't you?"

Levi has no idea which one of you is talking — Y/N, goddess of spring, or Y/N, goddess of destruction — and frankly he doesn't even care at this point. As long as he has your approval, he knows he can do whatever he wants. You pull him into a sloppy kiss, obviously inexperienced, but he likes it that way. He likes that you have no idea what you're doing because he can be in control. His hand runs up and down your thigh and you can feel heat building in your core.

"Tingles..." You mumble in his lips with a hazy smile.

"Have you ever touched yourself?" Levi pulls away and you nod. "Show me."

You feel embarrassed and small, but obey nonetheless. Your hand travels between your legs and your fingers touch your already swollen clit, rubbing it in circular motions. Levi watches you with hungry eyes, wanting very hard to abstain, but he can't, and so he takes your nipple in his hot mouth. You whimper at the new sensation, electricity shooting through your body as he snakes a hand between your thighs, two fingers diving into your cunt.

"Ah! L-Levi! So big!" You mewl and he throws his head back, releasing your poor nipple.

"That's nothing compared to what you'll get, you needy brat." He curls his fingers, hitting that sweet spot, and you buck your hips. Despite being a virgin, your body naturally knows what to do. Your spongy walls clench around his digits and Levi can already feel how tight you'll be around his cock. "You're so wet."

"Is t-that a good thing?" You're innocent and pure and you rock your hips back and forth, pathetic moans escaping your lips.

"Fuck, yes." Levi kisses you, and it's nothing like the kiss from your wedding. It's desperate and greedy, and he wants you all to himself. The pace quickens, he's pumping his fingers in and out of you faster and you don't know what to do, so you keep rubbing your clit and the familiar heat of your orgasm flushes through your body. You come undone on his hand, the sinful, squelching sound echoing in the bedroom.

"It didn't hurt at all!" You look at your husband, but there's a hint of mischief in your voice, a playful glisten in your eyes. Levi clicks his tongue, because the worst — and best — is yet to come, and you know it — you're no saint.

"Come here." Levi orders and yanks you by the hair, his aggressive gesture sending a shiver down your spine and into your cunt. "Be a good girl and open that pretty mouth for me."

You obey and part your luscious lips and then you see his cock for the first time — thick and veiny, it slaps your face as it pops out of his undergarments, the tip grazing over your cheeks.

"Levi that's... that's too big." You chew your lower lip and lean back.

"You'll be fine. You said it yourself, I'll take good care of you." He cups your face with one hand, thumb caressing your chin. "Now suck it. Make sure to use lots of spit."

You feel your cheeks hot and test the waters by giving the glistening tip a few licks, tongue swirling around it. It tastes salty, and you find yourself liking this. Levi pats your head, but you feel him tensing with each movement of your tongue.

"Shit." He curses under his breath and when you look up at him with doe eyes, his heart pounds into his chest. You courageously take the tip into your mouth, and with hollowed cheeks, you move further. "Yeah, just like that. Take it all."

Bobbing your head up and down, you try to take it all, but the girth and length is just too much, and tears pool at your eyes from the lack of air, but also from how good it feels to have a fat cock in your mouth. Muffled moans reverberate in your throat, and Levi can feel the vibrations tickling him. He firmly grabs your nape and holds your head in place.

"Trust me and relax, can you do that for me?"

You half-nod, anxious and somewhat excited for what is about to happen. Your husband rocks his hips back and forth slowly before aggressively fucking your poor throat, and you feel the arousal building in your core again. So much for promising your mother you'd always stay a virgin. You want to touch yourself again, but Levi slaps your hand away and thrusts into your mouth, holding your head still until you choke, your fingernails digging into his arm. The god pulls out and you gasp for air, and he almost feels sorry when he sees your pathetic state.

"A-again!" You flash him your pearls in a sultry smile, spit dripping down your chin. Who knew you liked asphyxiation?

"Needy brat."

"Please!"

"Tch, later. Right now, I want to fuck you." Levi growls and he already has you pinned on the bed, arms above your head and legs spread open for him. His cock presses against your slick slit and you brace yourself for the incoming pain. "If you want me to stop, tell me."

You don't have the time to nod when you feel a burning sensation between your legs. Squeezing your eyes shut, you bury the back of your head into the pillow and grip the sheets so tight your knuckles begin to lose their colour. Levi slowly pushes further, another inch buried in your cunt, and you bite on your lower lip. But you don't tell him to stop, instead your spongy walls clench around his cock and another inch gets lost in you.

You never thought gods could feel such immense pain, yet here you are, with a bloody lip from digging your teeth into it and a sore pussy. But the worst thing faded bit by bit when Levi bottomed out into your cunt. The two of you sit still, your husband allowing you to get used to his girth.

"Do you think I bled?" You ask, eyes filled with tears.

"Probably, but I promise it will never hurt like this from now on." He comforts you before licking the blood from your lips. The gesture makes your cunt flutter and Levi takes it as a sign to go on. Slowly, he rocks his hips back and forth, and the molten pain is replaced by tingles and arousal.

"You good?"

"Y-yes, oh, f- yes!"

"You can say fuck, you know?" Levi thrusts once, and it's so deep you feel his cock brush over your cervix.

"Fuck!" You cry out, legs wrapping around his waist to make sure he doesn't pull out. "Fuck, fuck, fuck!"

"Good girl."

There's no more room for gentle touches and soothing words when your husband fucks you raw. Your hips buck against his to feel that sweet pressure you never knew you longed for. In and out, his cock makes you feel sore and hazy, and you want more. The sound of his balls slapping your ass makes your mouth water and your eyes glossy, and Levi feels selfish. He pulls out, turns you over and takes you from behind, like a rabid dog fucking a bitch in heat. And you are in heat — you love the way his thrusts make you feel dumb, the way his cock stretches you, the way he uses and abuses your tight little cunt. Everything is so new to you and you adore every bit of it.

"Shit, I'm close." Levi warns you, his fingers digging into your hips, and you want to be good for him, so you drag your hand between your thighs and rub your swollen clit in frantic motions.

"L-Leeevi! I think I'm-"

"Fuck!"

When you feel a hot liquid shooting into you, your legs begin to tremble and you come on his cock, head falling onto the pillow with a heavy sigh. He pulls out and you already miss the feeling of being full, your juices mixed with his own dripping down out of you, down your thigh. You curl up next to your husband, hand holding his arm before you drift to sleep.

A sweet smell fills Levi's nostrils and when he looks at your tired body, there’s flowers in your messy hair. He still can't get used to the way your divine, disorganised powers work, but at least now he knows what's been missing from his life, and the corners of his mouth slightly twist upwards into a genuine smile. The god of the dead, in love with and married to the goddess of spring. Order and chaos blending together in one beautiful, perfectly arranged mess.

It’s fate. It must be fate that brought you together — but it’s love that will keep you together.

tagging @starrynightlys @stolemyheart12

[lucifer-is-a-bag-of-dicks]

If you ever do write for Dash, what direction would you go with him? What would his motivations be?

(I like seeing him as a closeted romantic who drinks the toxic masculinity kool-aid and Danny is his "favorite" because he has feelings for him and that just makes him more insecure and angry, but I don't think that would be fun for you)

oooh I feel like Dash very much fits into the category of someone who has been moulded by his expectations

canonically we know that he collects teddy bears, and has a tiny dog named uhhh Pooky? I think? he's clearly got a soft side that he keeps very firmly closeted (literally in the teddy bear case)

I thought maybe his obsession with football could be a parental influence, the cliché football dad pushing him in one direction, but that's boring and overused, I want him to have a dad like the Coach from trollhunters tbh, big Sport Man but also Super Nice and Supportive, mean jock having nice parents is a dynamic I really dig

so then I thought, this would have to be either self imposed expectations or pressure from friends or the school, Dash has mentioned multiple times in the canon that he has a very bleak outlook for his future, he has very little confidence in his abilities outside of football

I propose that Dash struggles so much in school that he has to rely on football as his one only ticket to success, maybe he has an undiagnosed learning disorder or dyslexia, something that's made it almost impossible to study properly and learn at the same level as other kids, leading him to rely on his physical prowess alone as a career option

and his whole attitude wouldn't be solely because he has learning difficulties (that's rarely a reason or excuse for treating people like shit and also a stereotype I don't wanna lean into) it's more that he's surrounded himself with other jocks who've built this toxic environment that made him bury his shit deep down and he's become afraid to ask for help for fear of ridicule

he doesn't force other kids to do his homework because he has a learning disability, he forces kids into doing his homework instead of asking for help because he's been taught that asking for help is for losers, the behaviour is a direct result of his social group and the education system failing him by not looking more deeply into his struggles, teachers will just always assume he's lazy and not ask further questions

so he struggles in school without understanding why, relies on football as the One Thing he can do well, but falls into that awful jock mentality that makes him a pretty shitty person, but he can't get out of that because he relies on being good at football, he can't lose his place on the team or the respect of his teammates, it's all he has, he is trapped in that toxic cesspool

so he walks like them, talks like them, shoves other kids around like them, and when he finally starts to realise there might be a reason he's struggling, he keeps his mouth shut about it because he doesn't want to get special treatment because he doesn't want people to know, because teenagers are fucking awful and his 'friends' would absolutely give him hell about it

I'm sure his parents would have figured something out eventually and that's why he ends up being tutored by Jazz, maybe she was willing to research his issues and work with him to find a way to manage it discreetly

so I don't think Dash would have been an awful guy by nature, I think if he hadn't lumped himself into a bad crowd he wouldn't be so insecure and wouldn't have to take it out on anyone, I think he really does like soft things and cute things and little animals and he absolutely has a secret instagram full of softcore vibes, and he's probably really sweet to his parents and behind closed doors

I also think the only friend he's open to about this is Kwan because Kwan is also Peak Soft Boy but he struggles to hide it, which is why in the one ep where Danny was given a place at the popular table, Kwan was the first guy they kicked out, Dash probably felt pretty bad about that but he couldn't let the other guys think he was going soft, they all voted Kwan and he felt like he had to follow suit, otherwise it would be him next time

I think he picks Danny as a target because Danny is probably a lot smarter than he looks, Dash might have been stuck sitting next to him at some point in middle school and watched Danny scribble out his work at the last minute and still get pretty decent marks

it probably pisses him off that Danny is so clearly really smart but just can't be bothered doing the work properly (when really Danny is adhd as hell and struggles in his own different ways)

so Dash picks him to do all his homework, because he knows Danny can do it, and he thinks Danny deserves it for wasting the skills Dash wishes he had

and Danny does it, because he's scared of Dash and also because it keeps Dash from shoving him in his locker tomorrow, he'll do the damn homework because he just wants to get through the day

Dash probably gets a whole lot worse once the events of the show take place because Danny was barely managing to get everything done to begin with but now with a chronically disrupted schedule via ghost shenanigans, he can barely get his own homework done let alone Dash's

which is why Dash gets extra personal about it, Danny is once again wasting his potential, he's failing his classes because Dash can only assume he's being a lazy piece of shit, instead of being a cripplingly exhausted neurodivergent superhero

honestly if his teachers had picked up on his difficulties early and he was given the help he needed he could focus on more than just football and not be stuck completely relying on that social group, he probably wouldn't even resent Danny, I like to think that he eventually starts to mellow out halfway through high school as people start to grow up and become less petty

I like to think he chases down Danny after graduation and gives a genuine apology for how he treated him, once he's come to understand himself a little better (talking to Jazz really helped), Danny doesn't forgive him right away, but is willing to let Dash earn his forgiveness by proving he has really changed, he probably gets involved in support groups for troubled kids as a way of atoning, keeps the cycle from repeating

so yeah those are my Dash thoughts, a soft boy by nature who's the victim of a shitty education system and toxic masculinity, but he comes out the other side alright

[marauderundercover]

Taking Chances Ch. 29: Happiest Place on Earth (Vacation/Roadtrip)

AO3

Prev

Marinette blinks at her dad, trying to make sense of what he’s saying.

“B, you have a private jet. Why the fuck are we driving?” Jason asks, and Marinette swears his eye twitches.

“I thought it would be nice to do a family vacation the normal way, complete with a road trip.” Her dad says and Marinette frowns. Now? Now is when he decides to be normal?

“Father, we can not all leave. Someone must stay behind to patrol and watch over Gotham. As much as it pains me, I will stay.” Damian says, and Marinette resists the urge to whack him. It wasn’t going to hurt him at all to get to stay, he was doing it on purpose. She wanted to go on vacation with her brothers and dad and Selina, but she also wasn’t sure she wanted to deal with them being so close to her for over fifteen hours in an enclosed vehicle.

“No need. Clark said he would make sure to listen for any extreme trouble, Stephanie and Barbara will still be here, and if all else fails we’ll use the Zeta tubes to get back.” Her dad says, his tone filled with finality. This was serious. He was really going to do this to them.

“Well, I’ll drive the second car. And I call Pix-”

“We don’t need to take two vehicles, Jason. Selina and I went out and bought a new car that will seat all of us perfectly, and there’s plenty of room in the back for luggage.” He says, and Marinette makes eye contact with Damian. His face says ‘fix this’, but all she can do is shrug. There was no way she was going to be able to save all of them from this one. Their dad looked way too determined. Alfred had somehow managed to plan his own trip to England to line up perfectly with their trip, which meant he was saved from the inevitable horror the trip would bring.

---

Marinette was willing to bet that her dad had never been on a road trip before. She honestly doubted he’d ever seen a movie with a road trip before, because if he had, they would most definitely not be on one. Even movies with road trips show how awful they are. Sure, the family is smiling by the end, but that’s because they’ve come up with a foolproof murder plan. Marinette frowns and blinks. She’d definitely been spending way too much time with Damian.

She had even tried to convince her dad to use Kaalki, even though he hated magic. In fact, Kaalki had begged as well. But no. So Kaalki was riding in the spare tire shell on the back of the car, unwilling to sit with her brothers for so long. Not that she could blame the Kwami. They were only an hour into the drive (that was scheduled to take fifteen hours and forty five minutes, not including breaks or traffic). She wasn’t too upset with the seating arrangement, but it had been calm so far. Too calm. Her dad and Selina were, of course, in the front. The next row, which also contained bucket seats, had Dick (he claimed one of the seats as the oldest) and Tim (who had to sit there because he got horribly carsick). That meant that she was stuck in the very back, sitting between Damian and Jason. But that was fine, they’d gotten along so far. They could keep it up for another fifteen hours, right?

---

They couldn’t even keep it up for another five minutes. Jason reached behind her and whacked Damian, which made him let out a battle cry, one that was way too loud for the car, before turning and attacking Jason again. She wasn’t sure how Tim was still asleep, even with his headphones on, but she supposed it was for the best. She really didn’t want to deal with her brother’s car sickness this early in the trip.

“This family is a fucking nightmare!” Jason yells, kneeing the back of Dick’s seat. Marinette glares at him and his dramatics. He was definitely trying to get their dad to turn the car around and switch to the jet. But Marinette had a feeling that instead of turning around, he’d drive even slower.

“Jay, I love you. But if you don’t stop screaming, they’ll never find your body.” Marinette whispers with a smile. Jason frowns, elbowing her gently.

“What’s wrong with you? I thought you’d be all over this shit.” He says with a huff. Marinette narrows her eyes.

“What, annoying shit?” She whispers snarkily, and Jason blinks. She frowns, until she realizes what she said. “Don’t tell dad!” She begs, latching onto Jason’s arm.

“Bruce!” Jason yells. Marinette yelps and covers his mouth.

“Jason, I am begging you not to do this.” She says, making eye contact with her dad in the rearview mirror and smiling awkwardly. “He was just guessing for, um, uh, I spy!” She yells, sighing in relief as he just nods and turns back to talk to Selina more. She’s about to give Jason an ultimatum, when he licks her hand. She gasps, yanking her hand back and wiping it on her pants with a frown.

“Karma!” Jason declares and Marinette huffs.

“No, it was just gross you mega jerk.” She says.

“Could I have the aux cord?” Dick asks suddenly. Marinette watches amusedly as Jason lunges forward to try and rip the cord from him.

“No, B, why would you give it to him?” He yells, trying to reach it, but unable to because of the seatbelt.

“I think you’re old enough to take turns, Jason. It’s not the end of the world letting Dick use the aux cord.” Dad says, and Dick cheers, plugging the cord into his phone. It’s completely silent for a moment, before ABBA suddenly blasts through the speakers. Marinette turns to Damian, her face stuck in a deadpan expression.

“I know you have a knife. Kill me, please. Or at least stab me badly enough that we have to stop.” She instructs, her eye twitching as Dick starts singing off key.

“If I had two, I would. But I refuse to allow you to escape this hell and leave me to deal with it by myself. If I am stuck here, ukht, then so are you.” Damian says, his tone just as flat.

“Nuh uh. Either all of the resurrected bitches get to die, or none of us do.” Jason pipes up and Marinette sighs.

“Completely unfair, but whatever.” She says, as a horrible thought suddenly crosses her mind. “Oh my god.” She says.

“What?” Damian asks. She pinches the bridge of her nose, and lets out a long breath before looking at her brother sadly.

“We have to drive all the way back, too.” She says, and chaos erupts in the backseat.

---

Jason glares at Bruce in the rearview mirror, waiting for the man to look back and notice him. He finally, finally does, and Jason just grins at Bruce’s responding sigh.

“What?” He asks, and Jason frowns.

“What, can I not just glare at you for no reason?” He asks, snorting at the overly done look on B’s face. “Okay, okay. I was just gonna ask you to stop at the next gas station. I need to walk around, my legs are literally dead.” He says.

“How? I thought Marinette was lying on your legs?” B says and Jason huffs.

“Yeah, she is, but I’m also scrunched up back here because Replacement just had to have the other good seat. I have long legs, B, I’m dying.” Jason says.

“Tt. If you were dying, I would not be forced to hear your voice.” Damian snarks, not even opening his eyes. Jason opens his mouth to argue, but is stopped by a finger raising slowly into the air.

“Shhhhhhhhhhhh.” Pix says before dropping her finger back down and shifting around. Jason just rolls his eyes, trying hard not to smile at his baby sister. Maybe he could wait to walk a little longer. He leans up against the window, letting the soft noises of the car lull him to sleep.

---

Marinette Dupain Cheng was not dressed to impress as she walked into the random McDonalds, somewhere in North Carolina. Her dad had wanted to drive the whole way in one day, so at the last stop before she fell asleep, she’d changed into a pair of leggings, fuzzy socks and one of Jason’s old hoodies. Add in slides and a messy bun that could be mistaken for an abstract art exhibit, and Marinette was not willing to talk to anyone. At least, not until she had some coffee. She’s barely able to order her food before she’s following her brothers to a table in the corner. Sitting in the seat between Tim and Jason, she doesn’t even blink at the oddly stick table. It was six in the morning, the cleanliness of a table wasn’t exactly her number one priority. She narrows her eyes as Dick tries to say something to her, not quite able to comprehend his words. Just as she thinks she’s going to fall asleep on the sticky table, a huge cup is placed in her hands. The smell makes her sigh in relief before she takes a giant swig of the coffee, barely registering how hot it is.

“-nette! God, that was definitely too hot.” Dick says. Marinette blinks, the pain in her mouth finally helping her to register the fact that the coffee was too hot. Way too hot.

“Ouch.” She says quietly, eyebrows furrowing together.

“Kid, you’ve gotta be more careful.” Dick says, passing her another cup. She glances at it wearily and he sighs. “It’s a glass of ice water. It’s gonna feel a lot better than the coffee right now.”

“But, coffee.” She says and Dick gives her a look.

“It’s not going to kill you to drink the water. Now eat up. B wants to get back on the road as soon as possible.” Dick instructs and she groans at the food he passes her.

“You are such a dad.” She mumbles, picking apart the weird hash brown patty he’d passed her, eating small pieces of it.

“I officially hate road trips.” Damian says in a matter-of-fact tone. Marinette glances at him sleepily and grins.

“Just wait til we get to Disney, petit oiseau. That’ll be your own personal hell.” She promises him, snorting at the look on his face. In fact, she doubted any of the family would actually enjoy Disneyworld, given the fact Mar’i and Starfire were off planet again. Well, she knew she would enjoy it. But she doubted her brothers or dad would. Selina would enjoy it, until someone inevitably pisses her off and she steals from them and then gets in a major fight with her dad and- yeah. This was definitely one of her dad’s worst plans ever.

---

Dick insists on taking a family picture at the first rest stop inside Florida. He’s grinning at the palm trees and dolphins painted on the ‘Welcome to Florida’ sign with so much excitement, Marinette almost starts to think that this plan wasn’t awful. Almost. Because three seconds later, Damian is charging at Jason with the katana that he had somehow managed to sneak into the car. Which should have been impossible. She purses her lips as she tries to figure it out, when she sees Kaalki and the wide smile on their face.

“Did you open a portal so that Damian could get his sword and attack Jason?” Marinette asks Kaalki tiredly. She was relieved that her dad had decided they would spend the rest of the day at the hotel (once they finally got there, they were still currently stuck at that stupid welcome sign) instead of trying to go to Disney today. She was exhausted, and right now, the Kwami was not helping.

“I only helped him. He’s so small, and he is your brother, you know.” Kaalki says and Marinette snorts.

“So is the one that he’s currently trying to kill, Kaalki. But okay, sure.” She says, rubbing her face tiredly. She did not have the energy to deal with this right now. She sighs as Jason yells, turning on her heel and rushing after Damian.

“Get the fuck away!” Jason screams at Damian.

“Damian, no, drop the sword! Damian, please!” Marinette yells, rushing after him.

“Todd insists that he’s bunking with me. If he’s dead, I don’t have to worry about that.” Damian calls back, continuing rushing towards Jason. Marinette groans, running faster after him. Apparently, he was excessively crabby when tired. Joy.

---

“Do you think I could get away with wearing these all the time?” Dick asks, pointing to the Toy Story themed ears on his head.

“Might make some aspects of life a little hard.” Marinette points out with a grin as she imagines him, in his Nightwing uniform, with Toy Story ears on.

“We’d definitely amuse more villains, that’s for damn sure.” Jason adds with a smirk.

“Like yours are much better.” Dick says with a pout, pointing at Jason’s bright red Lightning McQueen ears.

“At least I’m wearing one of the better Disney characters.” Jason counters, glancing at Tim. Tim just frowns at him, sleep deprivation clear on his face.

“Goofy is one of the original Disney characters, Jason, I will not be accepting criticism.” He says flatly. Marinette giggles.

“What’re you laughing at sparkles?” Tim asks, pointing at the sparkles and huge bow attached to her ears.

“Nothing. Nothing at all, Timmy.” She says with a grin. She glances down at her watch, wondering what’s taking her dad so long. “Mo-Selina, do you think Dad’s alright?” Marinette asks, barely catching herself. She hadn’t asked Selina, or her Dad, if it was okay to call her that. And she didn’t want to be the kid to ruin the vacation. She currently had money on Jason being the one to ruin things, and she didn’t want to self sabotage that bet.

“Oh definitely. He’s probably just having trouble finding the perfect ears. After all, animal ears aren’t really his thing.” Selina teases, giving Marinette’s shoulders a quick squeeze. She grins and leans into her, content as she stands there and watches the door waiting for- yup. That was her dad. Walking out of a store, in public, with Mickey Mouse ears on his head. Oh this is amazing.

“Nice ears, B.” Jason teases and Marinette giggles. Sure, his ears were the most basic out of everyone (just plain black) but it was still hilarious to see her usually serious dad with mouse ears on his head.

“Tt. I cannot believe that you insisted we all wear them.” Damian complains, but Marinette can tell he likes his ears, even if he won’t admit it. They were Stitch themed, which was Damian’s favorite Disney movie. Really, it was one of three that she’d found that he could tolerate.

“I think you all look adorable.” Selina teases, her ears, like Marinette’s, were on a headband rather than a hat. And Selina’s were white with a veil. Marinette adored them.

“Can we please go get some coffee at Friar Nook’s?” Tim asks, looking dead on his feet. She frowns, slightly worried. They’d only been at the park for half an hour and he was already ready to pass out?

“Did you not sleep at all last night?” She asks, her tone slightly teasing but still concerned for him.

“Blame Dick. He snored all. Night. Long.” Tim complains, sighing deeply. Marinette winces.

“Why don’t you switch with Jason? He can sleep through anything.” She suggests.

“Absolutely not.”

“I would rather chew off my own foot.” Tim and Damian speak at the same time, turning to glare at each other before huffing.

“Come on, let’s go do some rides or something.” Dad suggests, and Marinette agrees, trying her best to hype up her brothers. Even though she’d been wary of the trip, and she was still NOT looking forward to the trip back, she could tell her dad wanted this to go well. He was obviously trying to let them have once nice (normal) vacation together. So she was going to do her best to make sure the rest of the trip was as amazing as possible.

Next

Tag list:  @maribat-bdbwm @vixen-uchiha @stainedglassm @liquid-luck-00 @laurcad123 @waiting247 @jayjayspixiepop @mizzy-pop @jjmjjktth @trippingovermyfeet @queenz-z @thepaceperson @iloontjeboontje @toodaloo-kangaroo @ritacrow-blog @deathssilentapproach-blog @kittenmywaythrulife @nerd-nowandforever @tazanna-blythe @jaybird-and-co @jumpingjoy82 @lady-bee-fechin @corporeal-terrestrial

[waynedunlaptheorgandonor]

watched s11ep1

i will provide you with a quick review before i disappear back into the ether of twd avoidance

lots of spoilers under the cut. also i wrote way too much and i worked all night and haven’t slept so i didn’t bother to reread literally any of it, so it might be completely nonsensical, tho if you don’t expect that from me by this point idk whose blog you’ve been reading

enjoy:

hokay, first off, i’ll start by saying that i enjoyed it more than i expected to. i’ve been avoiding any sort of discussion about stuff, but my google algorithm is so fucked at this point that i still get recommended articles and stuff every now and then, so i was already pretty aware of what i was walking into, and was expecting it to be eh, but actually i prob enjoyed it more than i enjoyed the finale

(don’t get too excited tho, the finale was rly boring lmfao)

anyway

episode starts off with a tense scouting mission

it takes .005 seconds into the episode for caryl to exchange a look of longing, establishing that they are still having weird conflict and are both too fucking stubborn to do anything about it even tho they hate it desperately

i imagine that will continue for a while

rosita, kelly, carol, maggie, what’s her face with the bad hair, and lydia (i think that’s everyone?) lower down to some army bunker or something, where a bunch of walkers are taking a snooze, and the girls are very respectful of walker naptime, and do their best not to wake them up

obviously they eventually wake up, but i’ll get to that in a sec

as they’re tiptoeing through the walker tulips, there’s this split second where carol spots a machine gun, and looks at maggie with a face like, “can i plzzzz, i am mad horny for that machine gun,” but maggie tells her no. (i 110% expected her to defy orders and accidentally wake up all the walkers, but she actually behaved herself for once. well. mostly)

never fear, tho, after the girl gang collects a bunch of MREs they go back to wait for the dudes waiting up top to pull them up, and bc men ruin everything, one of the ropes break, and daryl catches it before it falls, but then a slow motion drop of blood falls on a walker’s face, and just like that, walker naptime is over, and carol uses her bow and arrow for two seconds before she is like “fuck this” and whips out the machine gun

yes, she is super hot using it

yes, daryl watches her do it

anyway, all the other girls get rescued, and carol is about to be pulled up, but bc she is a #girlboss, she first makes a beeline for one more crate full of MREs. daryl covers her while she gets the loot, and when she gets back up top they have another charged moment as carol hands him back his knife

just fuck already, jfc

titles!

cut to alexandria where everything is still not smilestimes

BUT, we do get to see uncle daryl run and hug rj and judith (and dog), and FUCKING HERSHEL JR, LIGHT OF MY LIFE is also there

istg, they could not have casted a better child, i a d o r e him

oh, and some friends of maggie’s show up too, idk

cut to a staff meeting where everyone is like, whomp whomp, we’re all gonna starve to death unless we figure out something quick

cue maggie going, “oh, i know where food is, but it requires me to tell you my tragic backstory, in case anyone didn’t watch my bottle episode”

she tells her dramatic backstory about all her friends getting slaughtered by the reapers for no apparent reason, and then she’s like “anyway, let’s go back there!”

no one thinks it’s a great idea, but a group of people decide to go anyway, including daryl and gabriel. rosita is super pissed that gabriel is going, and carol doesn’t go, probably partly bc it’s a shitty fucking idea, and also bc they have to keep caryl apart bc otherwise they’ll fix their problems ahead of schedule and they won’t be able to drag out the needless angst

daryl looks kind of annoyed that carol doesn’t volunteer to go 

bitch, i thought you wanted her to stop putting herself in the line of fire! make up your damn mind!

moving on

cut to a thunderstorm, where, if you look closely, you’ll notice daryl is wearing the STUPIDEST hat i’ve ever seen. just get an umbrella, jfc

for some reason negan is with them, bc ig he knows his way around washington dc, and no one in six years has bothered to figure out how to get around the city and/or get a map, and he is like “hey guys, maybe we shouldn’t try to walk in this fucking hurricane,” and everyone is like “FUCK YOU NEGAN, YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF US!!!” 

this will be a common occurrence 

but eventually daryl is even like “actually, it’s rly unpleasant out here, and my hat is mad stupid, can we go inside plz?”

so they go inside an old metro station, which is actually a rly cool cinematic choice. i rly like the idea, and they executed it rly well

speaking of executions

there are some fucking RULL CREEPY walkers. idk why they bothered me so badly, but they were what they at first assumed were corpses wrapped up in tarps, but turns out none of them had been properly put down, so they go through killing these rotted bodies that had supposedly been there since The Fall, and it’s very gross and cool

this entire time, btw, negan is like “hey, i know i’m a shitty person, but i have some rational arguments about why we shouldn’t be doing this right now,” and everyone is like, “FUCK YOU NEGAN, YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF US!!!” and he’s just like “god fucking damnit”

(i forgot to mention that at one point, when they’re headed into the metro station, negan is trying to warn ppl of the potential danger, and everyone is ignoring him, and he tries to talk to daryl, and daryl is like “fuck you, you think we’re BUDDIES?” and negan is like “oh, ok, so you’re gonna be like that too? fanfreakingtastic” and it’s very funny)

anyway. a fat monster zombie escapes its tarp at one point, and tries to eat some npc, and negan saves him, again is like “hey, anyone else realize that this is a FUCKING BAD PLAN?”, and everyone is like “we don’t care, you’re still shitty and we’re not listening to you, and you don’t actually care about random npc i would literally not be able to pick out in a lineup bc his face is so generic, you’re not the boss of us!!!”

it’s at this point that negan finally is like, “why am i even here? bc i know how to get around washington dc? do none of you have a map?” and i was like, “right?! that’s what i said!” 

it’s then revealed that maggie only brought negan along to murder him under the guise of “oops, he got hurt in the line of duty, it wasn’t my fault,” and daryl has this look on his face that says, “i seriously need to stop hanging out with lethal women bent on revenge bc it’s gonna give me high blood pressure,” and maggie has a badass moment where she points a gun she has for some reason at negan and is like “i have like, one shred of human compassion left inside of me, and if you keep pushing me i will fucking kill you without a second thought, so shut the hell up”

(in her defense, negan had just dropped glenn’s name to purposely antagonize her, which was rude as hell)

(for the record, i’m completely on maggie’s side here, but negan still is right that trapping themselves in a metro station is a bad call)

anyway, moving away from that briefly

i think this jump cut happens sooner, i don’t actually remember, but whatever who cares, point is, we get to the part of the show that actually matters, and that’s anything involving my love, juanita “princess” sanchez

and also eugene, yumiko, and ezekiel

they are being asked increasingly invasive questions by commonwealth ppl, some of which i wish they actually would of answered (what do they use to wipe their asses with?? surely toilet paper has long since become extinct)

zeke, who is so much more tolerable as a character now that he’s not larping as a king, has this incredibly weird and sort of sexually charged moment with a dude in an orange stormtrooper costume, where he’s like, “i bet you were an asshole cop back before The Fall, you stupid fascist, #fuckthepolice, mb literally? idk, this moment has a lot of pent up aggression that could easily translate to hate sex, it might just be the intense eye contact, but w/e, let’s just move along,” and then he has a coughing fit to remind the audience that he’s currently dying of cancer, and orange stormtrooper is like “lolz, loser, drink some water you dumb piece of shit”

cut to the wholesome foursome sitting at a picnic table in a guarded courtyard eating gruel, and yumkio, who finally has a personality, and princess are like “hey, this place fucking sucks, can we leave?” and zeke is like, “yeah, i met this orange stormtrooper who i think might be dtf and/or murder, so we should probably bounce”

but eugene is like, “but i want some hot stephanie ass, and also some bullshit excuse about how mb commonewealth will save alexandria” which, they left before things went super downhill, right? idr. it was after hilltop fell, but they don’t know alexandria got fucked either, if i recall? w/e, not important

two seconds after he says this, they talk to some people who are like “we’ve been here for four months, or maybe it’s been nine, i don’t actually remember, i’ve stopped processing the passage of time,” and the wholesome foursome takes this as a bad sign, tho that’s just the life i’ve lived as a night worker during a pandemic, so i was like #mood

but then they watch some guy get dragged away screaming to get “reprocessed” and eugene is like “ok, nvm, let’s bounce”

(my theory on what “reprocessing” is, is that they’re stuck in a room and have to watch hours and hours of customer service training videos on vhs from the 90s)

i definitely got my jump cut scenes mixed up bc i think the negan accusing maggie of a murder plot thing happened in between this scene and then the next commonwealth scene, but w/e, i’ll just finish what happens in the commonwealth arch

the wholesome foursome are trying to hatch a plan to escape, except princess, my love, is distracted watching some stormtroopers flirt, and the other three are like “wtf, dude, how can you even tell any of them apart?” and princess then tells them every stormtroopers backstory bc she is brilliant and pays rly close attention to shit, and the other three are like, “this is useful information, thank you for being an insane person”

their plan involves yumiko and eugene dressing up as stormtroopers and leading princess and zeke out of the place, which works fine actually, except on their way out they come across the Depressing Wall of Probably Mostly Dead Missing Loved Ones

they’re about to leave, when princess is like, “wait, yumiko, you’re on here, that’s weird huh?”

sure enough, yumiko  is on the wall, with a note from ig her sister 

the scene ends with yumiko going, “guys...i can’t leave...i have tragic backstory to unveil”

tragic backstory to be continued ig

back in murder metro town, npc and some other npc have stolen all the supplies, there’s a train blocking the track, and a horde of walkers are coming towards them, so things are not going fantastic

they horde is too big to take down, so they start to climb on top of the train car to get away

but dog runs away!

and daryl, being every pet owner ever, is like “gotta go get my dog, guys, try not to get killed while i’m gone, c u soon!” and he ducks under the train and disappears

#priorities

the episode ends with maggie climbing up the train car but getting grabbed by a walker and dangling off the edge, and negan is there and they have a lion king moment where maggie is like, “scar! help me!” and negan is like “long live the king, bitch” and walks away into the shadows, leaving maggie to a potential death

which, while i know isn’t actually going to happen, would be a really fucking funny move on the writers’ part

like, “look, lauren’s back! and now she’s dead, bet you didn’t expect that!”

anyway

my assumption is negan will actually end up helping her up or something, continuing his ambiguous morality bullshit that actually isn’t ambiguous bc he BEAT GLENN TO DEATH WITH A FUCKING BAT WRAPPED IN BARBED WIRE IN FRONT OF HIS PREGNANT WIFE

the maggie/negan arch is kind of dumb, but whatevs, i’ll tolerate it, as long as my boy glenn gets justice in the end

anyway, cue credits!

final assessment: good episode. i’m much more interested in commonwealth than the reapers, tho i am hoping that daryl’s personality-less ex turns out to be a monster killing machine with no conscience, that’ll be fun. princess is a gift from god. hershel jr needs his own tv show. needs more carol (and caryl)

the end! going back into my walking dead free chamber! see you next episode!

-diz

[inkbyajm]

Sense of Enervation

pairing: C.H. x reader

category: fluff

words: 1.2k+

notes: this was requested by a lovely anon who’s been overworking lately. if you’re reading this, please take at least a teeny bit of time off to take care of yourself and your nerves :( in the meantime, i hope this brings a bit of relief into your life

Wake up, work, eat something, sleep. Wake up, work again, eat a little, work more. Your routine had been pretty much the same for what felt like ions. Christ, you don’t even remember the last time your mind was occupied by anything other than work and responsibilities.

Your schedule had changed recently, demanding twice as much hard work, taking up twice as much time and requiring twice as much energy. Except, where were you supposed to get energy from if you never slept? Well, according to scientists, the length of a normal sleep cycle is only about 1.5 hours. So, technically, you should get away with sleeping for only two hours every night, right? You had read about how some people did have that kind of lifestyle, the amount of time they saved was the most appealing aspect of it.

In the beginning, like with all beginnings, it was quite difficult and demanded a lot of willpower, you were convinced that your body simply wasn’t built that way. But with time, you found it easier to wake up without wanting to lie in bed a little longer, the grogginess barely there. Sure, you helped your body replenish its rapidly burning energy supply with endless cups of coffee, a few cans of energy drinks and a sprinkle of cold showers, but it was a system that worked. You had to keep it up until things settled down.

Unfortunately, this meant you had barely any time for Corpse. Bless his soul for he never complained once or whined about how you never spent time with him. Good thing was, you lived on the same street, which permitted him to drop by your place whenever he wanted to. Had he known of your borderline self-destructing schedule? Not exactly, but you didn’t feel like telling him was necessary, it would only worry him more.

━

It was a cloudy Thursday morning. You had slept a little longer than usual, but you figured there was no reason to get worked up over that, you could get back on track later. Just like on any other day, you got up to start your morning routine, quickly ate some breakfast, and swiftly went on to start on your duties. Oddly enough, you weren’t really feeling all that well that morning. There was a hint of drowsiness and your mind seemed foggier than usual. Assuming it was simply from the extra hour you had managed to sleep, you thought nothing more of it and brushed it aside.

Towards the end of the day, or when the sun had already set and the time had come for normal folks to eat dinner, you felt a bit hungry yourself and tiredly dragged your feet to the kitchen. Your neck and shoulders ached more than ever, not only due to poor posture, but because of stress also. Sighing, you walked into the room only to find your partner there, in front of an open cupboard.

“Jesus, Corpse,” you exhaled, a hand over your heart, “I just about had a heart attack. When did you get here?”

He lightly chuckled with a confused look on his face. “I came in like two minutes ago? I greeted you, too.”

“Oh. Right, sorry. My mind is all over the place today.” With a frown, he walked over to you and pulled you in by the waist.

“Are you alright? You don’t look too well.” he said, gingerly cupping your face, “did you get any sleep last night?”

“I did, actually. I even got more sleep than usual. I’ll be fine, though. I guess it’s just one of those days.” you reassured him with a soft smile and pecked his cheek. He didn’t push any further.

Getting a mug from the cupboard, you placed it on the counter in front of you and stopped. What was it that you were doing? Weren’t you here for something else?

“(Y/N)?” you heard Corpse call out and turned to look at him with raised brows, “you were just kind of...staring at the cup. Are you trying to summon something or...?”

Food. That’s what you wanted. You supposed you’d get coffee too while you were at it. You scanned the room, looking through the shelves of the pantry. “Where did I put the coffee?” Stopping you in your actions, Corpse simply turned you back around and there you saw it, sitting right against the wall behind your cup.

“Are you sure you’re okay? You seem dazed.” he expressed his worry, rubbing your shoulders in a soothing manner.

You let out a long sigh. There was no way of avoiding it now. “I’ve been sleeping like two hours a night because I’m literally swamped with work, and I guess the fatigue has finally slipped through the cracks of the almighty caffeine.” You realised how hypocritical it was of you to be in this situation, given the fact that you always pushed Corpse to take better care of himself. 

Without another word, he took you to the living room and sat down against the arm of the couch. He then guided you to sit between his legs and began gently massaging your shoulders and upper back.

“I, out of all people, should know how fucking shitty it feels to get barely any sleep. And I understand how important your work is, but it won’t kill you to take a short break.” His voice sounded so mellow and soothing, you couldn’t help but loosen up in his embrace.

“I actually had a pretty decent day. I found a bakery that made cinnamon fucking raisin bread, so I had to order some. I wasn’t sure if I was going to stream or not, but then James Charles invited me to play hunger games on some Minecraft server. It was fucking insane. We had to like fight each other to death in this huge map-” 

Corpse continued to talk about how he was chased by three people at some point, how scared he was of constantly dying and ultimately not being able to provide good content, but how he ended up having a good few rounds, even managing to kill a couple of folks all by himself. 

━

Slowly opening your eyes, you took a moment to realise you were back in your bed, your pyjamas still on. It was quite dark in your room, near pitch-black. Had all that simply been a super realistic dream? Looking at the time, your brows furrowed more. It was well past bed-time. Suddenly, the door to your bedroom had opened and in came a curly haired figure.

“Shit, you’re awake.” he spoke as quietly as he could so as to not disturb the peace, “I had to take my medication, but the fucking bottle wouldn’t open. I’m sorry if I was too loud.”

A sleepy smile creeped onto your face. “You didn’t wake me up, bubba, don’t worry.”

He crawled under the covers and snaked his arms around your frame. “How are you feeling?”

“Pretty good, actually. Thank you.” you sighed contentedly, closing your eyes once again as you breathed in his cologne.

“Good, because you’re gonna be stuck here until you’re fully rested. There is no escaping the embrace of death. You try, you die.” You would have laughed at his nonsensical humor, had it not been for the exhaustion that had taken over your mind and body. The last thing you registered before drifting off to a long-awaited slumber was a delicate kiss placed on the top of your head and a very quiet “I love you”.

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

Stalker X Stalker, Part 5

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Perma tag: @nathleigh

Stalker x Stalker taglist: @aespades @jayjayspixiepop @blueslushgueen @fan-written @seraphichana @nerd-nowandforever

Marinette listened in on Tim for three days.

Not actively, of course, she didn’t hang onto every word he said. She just let her consciousness drift in and out of the conversations he had while she worked on finishing up the outfit she had designed for Audrey...

And, yeah, she was getting to the point where she was willing to bet on him being an okay guy. Better than okay, even. He was just so… genuine?

The first two days he had come in sick. She knew the signs of working while sick by heart, the trudging around and the groaning and the constant banging your head on the desk when you pass out randomly, and damn she was pretty sure even she wasn’t as bad as him. He probably shouldn’t be working at all, to be honest, he was CEO and there was nothing stopping him from taking the day -- or even just a few hours -- off. But, no, from the sound of it he was drinking ungodly amounts of coffee and calling it okay.

And despite the fact that he seemed absolutely miserable, he hadn’t taken it out on anyone. She had yet to hear him be impolite to anyone, not even the people that worked under him. His secretary had made a scheduling mistake and he had not only assured her it was fine but didn’t even require her to fix it.

Even when he was talking to himself while working he never once said anything questionable. And he talked to himself a lot. It was like a podcast, honestly, just hearing him rattle off numbers and weird business terms she hadn’t learned because she was self-taught. He talked almost constantly and he should have slipped up by now, yet here she was three days later with nothing to show for it except for a whole lot of guilt.

Marinette hadn’t thought much about it on the first day, everyone had their good days from time to time. On the second day she said ‘oh, it’s a coincidence’, but on the third day she had to call it: her paranoia had been a little unfounded.

Literally the worst thing about him so far was that he didn’t seem to care much about his own health… and that wasn’t really a bad thing about him as much as it was a bad thing for him.

So, yeah, it looked like she had no real reason to listen in on him anymore.

… but…

Something about him was nagging at her. He was a nice guy and she’d like to be his friend… it was just that, sometimes, she could swear she recognized his voice.

And it wasn’t like there were a lot of people she knew in America, she knew who he probably was.

Her hand itched towards the tiny device hidden under her window seat. One click (and maybe a little researching) and she’d know for sure who the bats were. The only thing stopping her was the knowledge that, if she did know their real names, she’d accidentally call them by them once and immediately get thrown either into a cell or out of Gotham. She was a meta (kind of), she was already on thin ice. She didn’t need the paranoid idiots that were the bats being more wary of her than they already were.

So, she left it alone.

She kept the bug, though. Mostly just because she wanted to hear it directly from him rather than just guessing by his voice. After all, voices can be similar. If he were to directly talk about bat business while she was listening in, though… that would definitely be a point towards her theory, to say the least.

And, yeah, she knew it was kind of messed up. She could be listening in on some innocent guy for all she knew, but it was… morally kind of okay? The whole thing about stalking is that it makes your victim feel unsafe. If he was Red Robin then he had found the bug and hadn’t felt unsafe enough to remove it and if he was a civilian then he would never know about the bug and therefore couldn’t feel unsafe. Therefore, it wasn’t stalking, not really.

… yeah, that makes sense.

She glanced at her sketchbook and yawned. She really needed to get a new outfit idea soon. Good thing Tim said he was taking her out tomorrow --.

Shit, Tim was taking her out tomorrow.

She jumped up from her spot at the window and ran to her closet. What to wear, what to wear...

Frenchie: where are we going tomorrow

Spiderman: It’s a surprise.

Frenchie: fuck your surprises tim what do i need to wear

She heard his laugh crackle through her earpiece. Rude.

Spiderman: Casual clothes.

Frenchie: there are LEVELS of casual tim

Spiderman: Oh, so we’re breaking out the capital letters. This must be serious.

She scoffed. Of course it was serious.

Frenchie: just tell me what to wear

Spiderman: A t-shirt and jeans is fine.

Kwamis, send her strength. Like she was going to wear a t-shirt and jeans. Did he even know who he was talking to?

But at least she had a gauge on how casual she could go. She picked out a light pink button down and black shorts for herself and then, because she had a little bit of foresight, she added some black tights.

She smiled faintly and dropped back in her bed.

She couldn’t wait to see where he was going to take her.

She found out the next day. Because that’s how things work.

She raised her eyebrows. “There’s no way it’s actually called a ‘space museum’. You’ve gotta be lying.”

Tim shrugged, a grin poking at his lips. “Do you really think I’d make it up?”

“Well, considering your outfit, I’d say you aren’t the most creative of guys so maybe you did,” she teased.

Tim looked down at his outfit and pouted. He was wearing little more than a black turtleneck and pants under a white jacket. “Must you make fun of every outfit I wear?”

“Only the bad ones. Seriously, would it kill you to wear a little bit of color?”

He rolled his eyes. “At least I thought to bring a jacket. It’s thirty degrees!”

She had forgotten that Americans used Fahrenheit, sue her.

Of course, she was never going to admit to this. She stuck her tongue out at him. “Maybe I’m just not a wimp.”

He snickered. “Oh, so you’re not cold?”

“Not at all.”

“Then stop hugging that coffee cup.”

She looked down at the coffee cup that was her only source of warmth and happiness in this cruel world that had two different measuring systems (three if you counted Kelvin). She gripped it tighter. “... no.”

He rolled his eyes again and, after a beat of hesitation, shrugged his jacket off and offered it to her.

Marinette normally wouldn’t give in this easy… but she really was cold and his clothes were far thicker than hers were and she knew that her teeth would start chattering soon which would have been so embarrassing...

So she blushed faintly and slipped the jacket on. It smelled like ungodly expensive cologne. “Thanks.”

He grinned. “I’m taking your coffee as payment.”

“No --!”

~

After dropping by a cafe so Marinette didn’t kill him, Tim took her to the space museum (yes, that actually was what it was called).

He thought she would have missed the night sky. Gotham hardly ever had a clear night due to the thick smog that hung over the city like a curse. And they spent quite a lot of time outside at night, she must have been feeling a little homesick.

So, he rented out the museum for the day. Yes, the whole museum. He was rich and mildly famous and what was the point of that if he wasn’t going to use it to make the people he cared about happy? He doubted she would be able to enjoy the sights as much if people were constantly taking pictures of them and asking about their relationship.

She raised her eyebrows just slightly but otherwise didn’t acknowledge the lack of people.

They slipped through the rooms quietly in search of inspiration.

Many of the rooms were your typical museum things: exhibits showing off different space rocks and explaining stars and supernovas. They didn’t stop much here, obviously, there was little to be inspired by. The most that happened for a long while was Marinette stopping from time to time to take a picture of a nice color that she wanted to try and replicate later.

And then she had stopped to look at a spacesuit. She blinked a few times before breaking into a grin and flipping to a new page in her sketchbook. He could barely make out the name ‘Jagged’ from where he was fiddling with his camera a respectable distance away.

So, Marinette, at least, was having a productive time. Tim was… a little stressed, to be honest.

Tim was having a particularly hard time getting ‘inspired’.

It had been years since he had picked up his camera, which was certainly a problem but it wasn’t the problem.

The problem was that he had never been one to take pictures of locations or objects. Sure, there was the occasional picture of the Gotham skyline, but he had always had a tendency towards taking pictures of people. Batman and Robin working as a team to take out a bunch of thugs, Robin and Nightwing racing each other across the rooftops, Batman and Nightwing stopping for ice cream after a particularly long patrol… and now he wanted to take pictures of Marinette.

But that would be weird because a) the first day he had implied he took pictures of attractions in order to alleviate suspicion about why he just so happened to be on the same rooftop as her and b) she probably wouldn’t think they were close enough for him to take pictures of her.

He kind of wished he could just go back to the old days where his subjects didn’t know he was there and he wouldn’t have to worry about what they would think about him if he took a picture of them.

His fingers itched towards the camera hanging from his neck because she looked so cute with her tongue poking out of her mouth and her orange, yellow, and white colored pencils sticking out from between her fingers like little Wolverine claws and he loved the way his jacket looked on her and --.

“You can stop staring, I’ll be done as fast as I can.”

His brain shorted out and the only response he could come up with was a squeaky: “Sorry?”

She looked up from her work with an awkward smile. “I’m sorry it’s taking so long, I just… if I don’t do it now it’ll slip my mind. I’m working as fast as I can, though.”

He was rebooting. Give him a minute.

Ah, there it was.

Wait, she thought he was being impatient?

“Nononono take your time, it’s fine! I just...”

He trailed off before he could finish the thought because this was the second time they had hung out he couldn’t make things awkward between them already.

… but she was giving him a confused, vaguely concerned, look and he was pretty sure that if he didn’t come up with something soon it would be awkward anyways.

“IwasjustwonderingifIcouldtakeapictureofyou?” He blurted out before he could stop himself again.

She blinked once. Twice. And then a blush spread across her face.

“Oh. Uh… sure?”

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to,” he said.

“It’s fine. A little sudden but… fine,” she said with a tiny smile.

Tim couldn’t keep the smile off of his face.

Not one to be blushy for long, apparently, Marinette flashed a wink. “Should I call up my friend Adrien for modeling tips or…?”

He rolled his eyes and schooled his face back into his usual grin. “It’s fine, just keep working. I’ll figure out angles and stuff.”

She tipped her head to the side confusedly. “Don’t you need me to be still?”

He didn’t look up from messing with the settings of his camera. “Not at all. You’re probably going to be one of my easier pictures.”

“... thanks…?”

“I do mostly nighttime photography. Capturing things in motion without it blurring requires a --.” He cringed. “Sorry, um… basically, when you want to take photos of things that are moving fast, you need a lot of natural light.”

“... you can talk about it more in depth, if you want.”

He shrugged. “I’d bore you.”

“I like your voice,” she said… then she seemed to realize the implications because she cleared her throat and did her best to backtrack: “In comparison to every other American I’ve heard so far, at least. Why do your accents… sound like that?”

“Ah, yes, because everyone knows that French people have the best accents.”

“Excuse you, I have been told by many people that my accent is actually very nice.”

He grinned. “By whom? Half-drunk men on the street?”

She gasped as if offended. “I get my information from much more reliable sources... like drunk women in bathrooms, thank you very much.”

“I see. My mistake. I apologize.”

“As you should.”

He rolled his eyes. “Whatever. Don’t you have a design to make?” She looked down at her sketchbook and a silence stretched between them as she squinted at her design.

“You forgot what you were doing, didn’t you?”

She groaned and rested her head in her hands.

He took a picture of her exasperated pout.

~

Marinette ended up with two outfits.

One was for Jagged, based off of the spacesuit she had seen. She had figured that, with all the songs he wrote about being free, there was bound to be one about how he ‘finally had his own space’. It was good to be prepared.

The other was for Cassandra Wayne. Marinette hadn’t thought much about it, to be honest. She just knew that Cassandra liked the color black with designs on top of it, and that the planetarium had a nice star pattern that would work for that. It would be super expensive, what with all the gems she would need, but it wasn’t like the Waynes couldn’t afford it.

… and then she looked up to see Tim pouting.

She giggled, resting her head on her hand. “What?”

“My sister is getting a dress and I’m not.”

Oh, so he was an actual fan. Interesting.

She brushed that conversation aside in favor of teasing him: “You want a dress?”

“Yes! No? Yes? I --.” He huffed and took a seat in the chair next to her. “I have faith anything you make will look nice.”

She felt a blush rise to her face and she rolled her eyes. “Hm. Telling the person in charge of your wardrobe ‘I have full faith in you’ is a terrible idea.”

“Oh? I don’t think you, in good conscience, can make and give me anything bad.”

She squinted at him for a minute before breaking into a grin. “Wanna bet?”

He leaned back in his chair, scrutinizing her for a few moments, before smirking. “Sure, how about we put five thousand on it?”

She choked. She’d forgotten he was rich rich.

She was quick to backtrack: “Nah. With all your fashion choices so far I can’t trust you not to wear it to some Gala or whatever it is you rich people do.”

“Damn, there goes that plan.”

She grinned and looked down at her sketchbook. After a few seconds she flipped to a new page. She squinted at his outfit for a few moments before starting to doodle something.

“What’re you making now?”

“I’m making you something with some color.”

He huffed. “Excuse you, I’m a goth in a family of goths. I can’t wear color.”

“Yeah, yeah. Trust me, I know. I’d say Richard is the black sheep of the family in that aspect but he’s the one wearing color.”

He laughed a little. “So Dick is the white sheep, then?”

“Yea --.” She stopped and then squinted over at him. “Dick?”

“It’s what he insists everyone calls him.”

She looked down at her sketchbook for a moment, processing, and then shook her head. “Your brother has a degradation kink.”

Tim brought his hand to his mouth in stunned silence before pulling his phone from his pocket and definitely not informing the family group chat of his discovery.

She snickered and went to work on the outfit again. It was a simple one, because she didn’t want to go too far out of his comfort zone, but there was no way she was going to be friends with a monochromatic idiot.

She leaned over until her head rested on his shoulder. He tensed up just a little before resting his head on top of hers.

~

When she had finished he took a picture of the planetarium to keep up pretenses and they had made their leave.

… but first, they stopped by the gift shop. Because why not?

Tim could have bought everything there for Marinette -- and probably would have, if asked -- but, considering she had freaked out about five thousand dollars earlier, he figured maybe he should keep that more or less quiet.

Instead, he followed her around while idly bouncing a Saturn shaped bouncy ball. It was a terrible shape for a bouncy ball and he kind of loved it, to be honest. Not to mention the little smile Marinette made behind her hand every time the ball would try another mad dash for freedom was pretty cute.

And then they hit the t-shirt section. And her lips twitched as she reached out and picked up a bright blue shirt that said ‘May the F=MA be with you’ in white text.

“It’s awful. It’s perfect.”

He grinned. “Wow, look at you. You know one of the simplest physics formulas by heart, aren’t you smart?” He joked.

She bowed. “I know, I know.”

He held out a hand for it and she stared at him for a few seconds in confusion.

“I’ll hold it until we get to the front desk.”

She squinted at him. “I’m paying for my own shirt.”

“I can afford it,” he said with a sigh.

“So can I.”

“Either you let me pay for it or I’ll keep track of everything you buy while with me and add it to your commissions.”

“... either you let me pay for it or I’ll never make an outfit for you ever again. I know your measurements and style, Timothy, you won’t be able to get past me.”

They narrowed their eyes at each other, daring each other to call their bluffs…

And then his shoulders sagged. “Fine.”

He’d just have to use his connections to lower prices on fabrics for her. Did he mention that he was rich and mildly famous? Yeah. It was pretty cool.

~

She smiled as she leaned against the doorframe to her apartment. “Thanks for taking me out. It was fun.”

He shoved his hands in his pockets and smiled back. She was determinedly ignoring the way his smile made little butterflies flutter in her stomach. She patently hated butterflies. They weren’t allowed.

“I had fun, too. Want to do it again, sometime?”

“... sure, I guess you passed my test.”

He raised his eyebrows. “Your test?”

“Oh, yeah.” She waved him off. “If you had made any creepy comments today I would have blocked you.”

He seemed a little relieved by this information, though she wasn’t quite sure why. “That’s a pretty good test to have in Gotham.”

“I know, I’m pretty smart,” she said jokingly.

He shrugged. “Yeah.”

Damn it, now she was blushing. Shit.

She crossed her arms over her chest. “Do you flatter every girl you take to the space museum? Is this your strategy?”

He snickered. “Well, considering you’re the only girl I’ve taken, I’m going to have to say yes.”

She hummed. “I’m glad I’m so special to you, because that means you won’t drop me when I never give you this jacket back.”

He huffed. “You can’t just do that.”

“I can and will,” she teased. Then, because she wasn’t a completely cruel person, she reached up to her coatrack and pulled down a red scarf for him. “Here, take this so it’s more of a trade than stealing.”

“If I don’t?”

“Then you get to walk back to your house in the cold like that.”

He snorted. “What happened to not wanting to steal?”

“At least I offered!”

He rolled his eyes and leaned down so she could wrap the scarf around his neck.

She looked up at him, a blush spreading across her face, and then carefully draped it over his shoulders. “There. Now you have a splash of color.”

He smiled at her. “Ah, I see, this was all just a plot to get me to wear colors. It all makes sense now.”

“Of course.” She tugged him down more by the scarf to press a kiss to his nose. “You should wear red and black more often. They’re totally your colors.”

He smiled a little dopily. “You have no idea.”

She pushed his face away. “Weirdo. Go be cryptic somewhere else.”

“Fine, fine. See you in a few days.”

“See you then.”

~~~

Bonus Batfam group chat stuff

Timtamalam: What if Dick makes everyone call him that because he has a degradation kink?

LetMeLeaveTheChat: i fucking hate this family.

BloodSon: This is exactly the kind of lowbrow humor to be expected of you, Drake.

Timtamalam: I’m unappreciated in my time.

CAss: :0

Timtamalam: See, this is why Cass is the favorite.

YouDontSeeMe: DickJoke please respond

DickJoke: I raised each and every one of you and this is the thanks I get

LetMeLeaveTheChat: sucks to suck, dickwad.

DickJoke: That’s it when I get through all this dumb Heartless stuff I’m coming back to the manor and we’re all going to have family time

CAss: :(

ItsEggplantNotPurple: damn it

YouDontSeeMe: crap

LetMeLeaveTheChat: fuck. and an extra “fuck” on duke’s behalf.

BloodSon: Look at what you have done, Drake.

Timtamalam: Sorry guys.

[krreader]

BTS scenario → proposing to you in the least romantic situations.

pairing: bts x reader fandom: bts warnings: language ; mentions of sex  genre: fluff  word count: 2.8k+

a/n: hiiii my love @franseza​, I love you too and I really hope you like your request ♥ (also, let’s all ignore that they’re actually holding up earbuds okay? I unfortunately do not have gifs where the propose with an actual ring lol)

kim seokjin

The perfect moment.

The proposal had to be the perfect moment that he had been planning for literally five months now... only for it to get ruined when your connecting flight got canceled and you and Jin were stuck in a hotel of a country that he hadn't booked an entire restaurant in for his plan to start off. Where he hadn't specifically instructed the chef to cook your favorite meal. Where he hadn't specifically asked the hotel to prepare a romantic room for you two to arrive in with rose petals on the floor and candles all around for him to propose to you.

Now, you were lying in bed, eating potato chips while watching a program on TV that you didn't understand the language of and Jin just watched you with a heavy sigh.

“Oh, there you are!” you slid to the edge of the bed and grabbed his hand when he finally stood in the bedroom, pulling him down next to you, “I have no idea what's going on in that show, but I think that woman is pregnant and the father is her sister’s husband!”

“Aren't you upset?” Jin watched you with furrowed eyebrows.

It was only then that you realized that he was.

“Babe,” you put the potato chips away, cleaned your hands and then grabbed his, “I don't care where we are for vacation. What matters most to me is that we can finally spend some time with each other without you having to worry about work. What matters most to me is being here with you.”

He hadn't thought about it this way. That 'perfect scenario' in his head had kept him from seeing what really was important.

You and him. Together.

“Well, in that case..-”

And so Jin proposed to you that night, in a hotel room of a hotel that Jin would normally not stay in anymore, with a stupid TV show on in the background and loud noises of cars downstairs.

But it didn't matter to you. What mattered to you was him kneeling there in front of you and asking you to marry him because he loved you just so fucking much.

You joined him on the floor once and kissed him deeply, so deeply that the two of you tumbled backwards, now chuckling as Jin was pushing the ring on your finger.

It was perfect after all.

min yoongi

The reason why this whole long distance relationship thing had worked so well in the past, was because Yoongi was so busy with work anyways, that he wasn't sure if he could fit 'proper' dates into his schedule. FaceTime dates and late night calls – when it was earlier for you – were the perfect recipe for your perfect relationship.

And you had been quite busy yourself when you had started dating him, were busy with getting your degree and were glad that you could still focus properly on it and not have to worry about whether you could make time for him.

But it's been years now and Yoongi wasn't who he was when he first started dating you.

Seeing you only a handful of times per year wasn't enough for him anymore. He wanted you to be with him. 

Fully be with him.

And.. more than that.

“Tell me what you're thinking about,” you said with a yawn.

“Just... us,” his smile was soft as he watched you try and keep your eyes open since the time difference was once again your biggest enemy.

“Yeah? In what way?”

“In a “I want to marry you so badly so that you will finally come and live with me and we can see each other every single day for the rest of our lives” way,” it was so blunt, it was so unromantic, yet at the same time, it was perfect.

In hindsight.

Because in that moment, you simply laughed, “Ooooh, I like that thought. Where's my ring then, dear husband?”

Yoongi looked at you for a few seconds, then he got up, walked over to his desk and went back with a ring box, opening it and holding it into the camera.

That finally got your attention, you sitting up straight in an instant.

“Come and get it princess,” he said with a smirk.

jung hoseok

You and Hoseok have been dating for years and even after all this time, sex with him never became dull.

Today, in fact, you've been doing nothing other than lying in bed, watching Netflix and doing each other. Again and again.

It was the perfect day off.

And he made it even more perfect when he ordered a shit ton of delivery food and let you eat it in his bed, while he put on your favorite movie, you wearing nothing but your panties and one of his sweatshirts.

And as you were stuffing yourself, he suddenly asked: “Do you want to marry me?”

“What?” you asked with a full mouth, quickly gulping everything down, “You're asking me this now? I look like shit!”

“This is what I love most about you. You being you.”

For a moment he was scared that he might have disappointed you. That he should have made this more romantic and not just throw a question like that in the room while you were having sauce smeared all over your mouth.

But you actually started to laugh, “You surprise me every day, Jung Hoseok. But where's my ring? Do I not get some sort of ring at least?”

Hoseok walked into the bathroom and came back with a bit of toilet paper, rolled it into a ring and pushed it onto your finger. You laughed and said it was perfect, but then Hoseok pulled out the actual ring from his bedside table, making you gasp.

“What..- you think I'd just ask you this question without being at least a little prepared? I guess I do surprise you every day.”

You jumped into his arms, but carefully, so that you wouldn't have to sleep in sheets stained with all sorts of food.

The messy part came afterwards.

But that was celebratory sex.

kim namjoon

Namjoon knew he wanted to marry you the moment you had asked him if he wanted to have your first date at this coffee shop/book shop. It was as if you were his soulmate.

But he took his time with asking.

Four years, in fact. Four years of nothing but love and affection and with each day he spent with you, his desire to marry you broadened.

And now here he was, trying to rent out this part of the observatory for the night so he could ask you under the stars if you wanted to marry him.

“I'm so sorry, Mister Kim, but we're completely booked. I can't offer you a spot for another five months.”

“Five months?!” Namjoon repeated in surprise.

“This is the best season to see the stars. Most people prepare months in advance for a tour. If you want to rent this part out, it'll be at least five months until I can promise you you'll have it all to yourself.”

Well, he took it. He didn't really have any other option and he told himself that he's waited four years, so what's five more months, right?

But with each day that he spent coming home to you after that day, he felt like he was about to burst. It was as if he just wanted to finally let out that secret that he's been hiding from you for so long.

And one day, that feeling just became unbearable.

“Ugh, we should have just went sooner. Why is traffic always this bad around here?” you leaned back in your seat, looking at your boyfriend when he was too quiet, “Hey.. you okay, babe? What's that in your hands?”

He's been playing around with it since he sat down in your car. But he's been hiding it well under his strong hands.

However, once you mentioned it, he showed it to you.

“My plan was a different one, believe me. But does it really matter where I ask? What matters is that I ask, right? The sooner the better. Because the sooner I ask and the sooner you'll hopefully say what I desperately want you to say, the sooner we will officially start our lives together.”

You listened, then you smiled softly, finally you nodded, “You're right.”

“Alright then, (Y/N) (Y/L/N). The love of my life, my soulmate.. will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?” he opened up the ring box with the most beautiful and hopeful smile that you'd ever seen.

And just as you were about to say yes, the car behind you started honking.

“Oh, shit,” you quickly drove forward, just a little bit until you came to a halt again, then you leaned forward and kissed your, now, fiance, “I do, Kim Namjoon. Of course, I do.”

park jimin

You were sure that he meant well. Because this venue was actually really nice, minus the thousands of people that have gathered here today.

Jimin had been acting nervous all night long and kept trying to pull you away from the crowd because he needed to tell you something, but every time he tried, someone came up to him for a conversation.

He had this grand plan of taking you up on the rooftop where you could see all of Seoul, then propose to you there with this speech that he's worked on for weeks... but it didn't work out that way.

And at around three in the morning, the host thanked everyone for coming and basically, in a nice manner, asked everyone to leave now.

“Finally, I think if we stayed any longer, your ear would have fallen off,” you chuckled as you walked out hand in hand. But Jimin was deep in thought, then suddenly stopped in the hallway while a bunch of people just walked past you, “Hey.. you okay?” your eyebrows furrowed in concern, your hand gently cupping his face.

It was only then that he looked at you.

“It wasn't supposed to be like this, believe me. But I don't want to leave here tonight without doing what I actually came here for.”

The scenery wasn't exactly the most romantic, you were literally standing in the middle of a hallway, which, thankfully, was empty at this point.

But what mattered most to you was what Jimin said once he knelt down in front of you.

“When I was younger, I thought my only dream in life was to become an idol and be famous. But even though I achieved that, I still felt like something was missing. So I pushed harder and harder, but no matter what I did, I didn't come any closer to happiness. Only when I met you did I realize what it really was that I always wanted,” Jimin grabbed your hands and smiled up at you, “You showed me that the most important thing in life isn't fame, money or success in my career. The most important thing is love. Coming home after a long and hard day of work and being able to smile when I see you, when you stand there with your arms open, welcoming me with a hug. That's what matters the most. You make me a better man and have been doing so since the day I met you. There isn't a day that goes by that I'm not thankful that you're by my side. But I don't want you to 'just' be my girlfriend anymore. I want to call you my wife. And so, even though this isn't at all where I wanted to ask you this,” he pulled out the ring box and took a deep breath before he asked: “Will you marry me, (Y/N)?”

You hadn't realized that a few people had wanted to cross, but had waited for Jimin to finish his speech, only when you had finally said yes with tears in your eyes and were in the arms of your fiance, did everyone around you clap for you two.

The venue didn't matter. It mattered that it came from him in such a way.

kim taehyung

Taehyung thought that taking you on world tour with him would be the perfect opportunity to ask you to marry him, given all the romantic spots and places that he could take you to to ask.

But see, sometimes BTS forgot who they were. There was a reason they did a tour in those countries. It was because they had a lot of fans there.

It wasn't as easy as he thought to just take you to the Eiffel Tower and propose to you there. It didn't work like that for him.

And despite pleading, his managers denied him his request again and again.

“You've been upset for nearly two hours now,” you sat down next to him on the empty stage of the empty arena. Only a few cleaners were in here to prepare everything for tomorrow, “Will you finally tell me what's wrong?”

“I'm sorry, (Y/N). I wanted this to be a romantic vacation, even though I'm working.”

You let out a chuckle and pulled him against you by wrapping your arm around his shoulder, “How many times do I need to tell you that I don't care about the whole romance thing? What matters to me is spending time with you. Imagine me not having come with you.. we wouldn't have been able to see each other for months. That's way worse. So this is perfect, trust me.”

“Perfect?” he raised his head, blinking at you with wide eyes, “Really?”

“Well.. yes.”

You didn't necessarily mean this arena while you could hear vacuum cleaners and workers laughing. But that's apparently what he had thought you had meant, as he jumped off the stage and pulled out a ring box so suddenly that you actually gasped.

You definitely hadn't expected that move.

“I wanted it to be perfect. Because that's what you deserve. The best. And I know I'm not, I know you could do better and I know I need to do better every single day to become the man that you deserve, but I'm willing to do that. If you let me.”

That made you sigh and actually jump off the stage to grab him by his shirt and pull him up.

“Don't you ever say that again, Taehyung. Don't you ever say that you're not already the most wonderful person in the world to me. Especially now..- that you're my husband to be.”

When you started smiling, Taehyung quickly broke out in a huge grin and wrapped his arms around your middle, lifting you up in his arms and spinning you around once.

jeon jeongguk

When they were younger, the boys would often joke around on who'd be the first to become a dad. Probably everyone was an option but Jeongguk in these discussions. At first it was because 'he's just a baby', then eventually it turned into 'he's too shy to ever even look at a girl' and ultimately it was 'he's responsible enough to know how to use protection'.

Well, all three of these statements were false.

Jeon Jeongguk is not a baby anymore, he showed you that time and time again.

Jeon Jeongguk may be shy in certain situations, but certainly never with you.

And lastly, Jeon Jeongguk knew how to use protection for three years straight and then, one very early morning, just forgot. And because you had forgotten to take your pill a few days earlier but didn't remember that in that very moment, you had unprotected sex with him. Happily.

And now here you were, in a hospital, sweating from the pain and having trouble breathing while his baby was desperately trying to get out of you.

The doctors had said you weren't ready to push yet, but fucking hell, it definitely felt like you were ready.

“So, babe, I know this is probably not the right moment, but I really wanted to ask you this before the baby is born and now I don't have time anymore and..-” but when he saw your angry stance, he just opened up the ring box and held it into your face with a looped smile, “Will.. you marry me, (Y/N)?”

“What?! You're asking me this now?!”

“Well, I told you, I wanted to do this earlier but the timing was always wrong and..-”

“And now is the right timing? While I'm pressing our child out of my vagina?”

“When you're putting it like that.. maybe.. not?”

There wasn't time for you to answer as the doctor walked in at that very moment and after that, everything happened extremely fast. You barely remembered the in-between now, it only came back when your daughter was finally in your arms and you and Jeongguk sat there smiling down at her.

Only then did you finally look up at him and say: “By the way?”

“Hm?” he smiled as softly as you did.

“I'm saying yes.”

Jeongguk let out a chuckle and kissed your temple before he pulled the ring box back out of his pocket and slipped the beautiful diamond ring on your finger.

[twerkinwithhazza]

Pumpkin Seeds

Author’s Note: UH OHHH BACK AGAIN. I’m back yall finally off hiatus all because my phone is broken LOL. Anywho tumblr is a totally different place and most of my mutuals are adulting now. I would love new tumblr friends and I’m gonna try to continue this writing stuff but I’m busy with adult things now lol and it really depends on if you guys like what you see. Please excuse my rustiness this my first imagine in years... literally. I’ll get better with time. This was also slightly edited but I know there bound to be some mistakes. Anyways watch the Golden music video for clear skin and I hope you guys enjoy!  I think it's so adorable that whoever requested this thought this request wouldn't speak to me lol ! It definitely did because this went from a blurb to a full blown imagine.

psst you can read my other work here!

Warnings: smut smut smut and more smut and possible shitty writing, dirty talk, light choking, and some cursing.

Glossary: (y/c/n)= your cousins name + (y/m/n)= your mothers name

Request: hi!!!! if you are wrtiting for Harry please can you do one where missus and Harry are at a family party and have a quickie in the bathroom? don’t worry if it’s not speaking to you lol xxx

Normally you and your husband loved spending time with your families. Harry was always playing a balancing act between filming music videos, doing interviews, writing sessions, and an occasional date night in the house that always involved a Postmates order from your favorite restaurants and the two of you binge-watching Netflix on shuffle. As much as the both of you enjoyed stuffing your face with poke bowls from Poke Papa and watching True Crime stories, it wasn’t exactly romantic or fulfilling for the both of you, just enough to hold you over until his schedule clears up. So when Harry finally got a weekend off, you guys were ecstatic! You spent the week cleaning the house and meal prepping so no Postmates would be needed and Harry used his free time in between interviews for shopping for special toys and pretty lingerie he wanted to see you model for him. Flirty text messages were sent back and forth during small work breaks about your plans for the weekend and now all the two of you had to do was make it Saturday.

You’re not gonna like this...

The 5 words that destroyed you and Harry’s weekend plans. Anne called while you were organizing your closet and announced that her and Gemma, along with your parents and favorite cousins were coming to town to spend time with the two of you. You tried to convince her that maybe a small dinner party at that new fancy restaurant downtown would be a perfect spot for a get together but she was adamant about coming over to cook the two of you a homecooked meal. Breaking the news to Harry was the worst part, he was clearly devastated (you swore you saw the man shed a few tears). Now here you were stuffing your mouth with Anne’s famous juicy cooked duck instead of your husband's juicy di...

“(Y/N) can you pass me the mashed potatoes”

Your dad’s strong yet muffled voice interrupted your train of thought and broke you out of your horny trance as he chowed down on his meal. Pushing the dish over in your dad's direction allowed you the chance to look around and take a glance at Harry who was making small talk with one of your favorite cousins. He was wearing a black button-down shirt, of course with a few buttons loose, and his cross necklace bounced on his chest as he laughed at your cousin's crazy work stories. You focused on his fingers, his infamous rings adorned his hands, you noted that they were slightly damp from eating and the condensation on his glass cup. As you were drinking in his appearance a small damp spot was forming in your panties but given that there were too many eyewitnesses including, yours and his parents so you chose to just clamp your thighs shut and stuff your mouth with more mashed potatoes. 

Harry deserved his credit as a husband. Despite his calm demeanor, he was very well aware of your little ordeal yet still managed to give interview advice to (y/c/n) and compliment your mom’s cocktail mix. He was quite amused by how increasingly frustrated you were becoming. He noted your concentrated face as you munched harshly on a string bean, hands clenching onto the fork for dear life. He decided to do a little temperature check to truly see how far gone you were.

“So what are we thinking for dessert pecan pie or crumble cake ?”, Harry questioned as he stuck his fork in his mouth, pulling it out again once all the gravy was licked clean. Your eyes finally met and you can tell that he was tossing the ball in your court, it was your job to show him how you wanted the game to be played.

“Mmm I don’t know I guess I’ll have some pecan pie but I really wish I had some pumpkin seeds”, you flatly said as you finished sipping your wine, maintaining full eye contact with him.

Pumpkin seeds. You and Harry were “outside of the box” thinkers, you had to be with his life as a celebrity not exactly pairing well with your shared sexual fantasies. You had code words to indicate to each other when you were craving the other one's touch, but you knew that using the same words around friends, family, and other public figures for too long would possibly cause some suspicion. So your code words changed with the seasons, literally. When the leaves started turning that classic golden yellow and auburn, your code words changed thus came the use of the word Pumpkin Seeds.

Gemma and your mom shared a glance, raising their eyebrows in collective confusion.

“Pumpkin seeds.. For dessert ?” Gemma finally burst out., both of your mothers soft laughter followed in the background.

“Heyyy” ,Harry pouted as he bopped Gemma on the nose with some gravy ,“ I have you know Pumpkin Seeds are one of our favorite midnight snacks”. 

“Gross“, Gemma stuck out her tongue and wiped her nose. You couldn't tell whether she was referring to the gravy on her nose, your choice of midnight snacks, Harry’s smug statement followed by a wink at you, or a combination of all three.

“Well we can be concerned with dessert once we break out the baby pictures, I’ve been dying to see the infamous skinny dipping picture (y/m/n) has been telling me about”. Anne clapped her hands together and hopped out of her seat heading to the kitchen. Your mother followed behind but not before instructing you to head up to the attic to retrieve the pictures. You glanced at Harry but he seemed occupied cleaning up the dinner plates with your dad. You let out a frustrated huff and made your way up to the attic to grab the photo albums. 

As you shuffled through old boxes holding Harry’s old tour outfits and your little knickknacks from your travels, you heard the attic door open.

“Pumpkin seeds huh?”, Harry lightly chuckled letting the attic door close and leaning against the door frame. 

You refused to make eye contact with him, continuing to shuffle through the bins locating a few photo albums as you went , “It was only a matter of time Harry and you know it. Our weekend got stolen and we haven’t... ya know in like two weeks. So, yes Harry I want some damn pumpkin seeds.”

You let out a huff. You didn’t mean to come off so sassy and aggressive but you were frustrated… sexually. Your cousin was getting more Harry time in the 3 hour family dinner than you had gotten in the past two weeks. You stacked the photo albums gently on top of each other and cradled them in your arms, finally turning to face your husband but you didn't have to look very far. Harry had closed that gap between the two of you, gripping your face and making you look up at him causing you to drop the albums in shock. 

“Well let’s get you your pumpkin seeds then”

That’s all it took and sparks turned into a flame, you and Harry’s bodies connected and a feverish makeout session broke out. You both were so hungry for each other after weeks of neglects and it just felt so damn good to finally connect. Harry’s wet kisses were making their way down your neck, nipping and sucking as he goes. You knew he was getting into it and normally you would be completely here for it if your kitchen wasn’t flooded with family members waiting to laugh at your baby pictures.

“Baby.. we… fuckkkkk”, You moaned out as Harry popped one of your nipples out of his mouth before moving to nip on the next one. “Baby we can’t your mom is downstairs… we have to go”, you finally let out and glanced down at your husband as pinched your nipples between his finger tips. “When has that ever stopped us”, he slyly laughs. In one swift motion, he turned you around pulling your back into his chest pulling down your skirt. You couldn’t even get words of protest out, Harry had his hands wrapped around your neck and was already freeing himself from his pants and boxers. He pulled your panties to the side and let out a hiss as he watched a string of your arousal stretch from your dripping flower to his fingers.

“Baby please just do something”, you huffed out a soft moan as you waited in anticipation. The grip around your throat tightened as he entered you, both of you letting out a sigh of relief. Harry completely bottomed out inside of you, touching that special spot that only he could. Your walls clenched around him, holding him in snug almost as if your pussy was begging him not to leave. Normally the two you were very vocal during sex from dirty talk to his loud moans and your even louder cries of pleasure. However you both knew that wasn’t possible right now and kept your moans down as much as you could. Harry was not making it easy though and the noise coming from the two of your bodies colliding were basty in the best ways possible. With every thrust of Harry’s hip you could hear your wetness coating Harry dick and as Harry picked up the speed his balls roughly tapped on your clit, only adding to your pleasure. You could barely form thoughts let alone sentence, Harry was literally fucking you silly and using your G-Spot as punching bag for his dick, The sounds and the pleasure were clearly getting to Harry as well, the grip he had on your hips grew tighter and his eyes were squeezed shut. 

“Bloody fucking hell you’re so tight around me, can’t even take it”, he groans and throws his head back as he roughly draws your hips into his. It didn’t even feel like it was possible but Harry picked up the speed of his thrust continuing the assault on your poor needy pussy even further. The pleasure was all too much and that oh so familiar feeling hit the pit of your stomach and you were starting to lose your composure. Your moans were getting increasingly louder and your grip on Harry was growing tighter. Harry knew his wife and he knew your dam was getting closer and closer to breaking and he was determined to get you there. He placed a hand over your mouth and moved his other hands down to your clit rubbing it in slow circles. “ Look at you” he cooed cockily, “Taking me so fucking well like a good girl should. Barely let out a scream ‘cus you don’t want your parents to hear how much of a cock whore you are”. He knew you wouldn’t last long with the way he was talking to you and he was absolutely correct because his words were driving you insane. As the pressure was continued building up in your stomach, you felt the telling twitch in Harry’s dick that let you know he was approaching his end too.

“Gonna give me what I want uh? Gonna cum all over my cock and let me cum in that tight little pussy of yours. You gotta hold it in.. don’t want to leave any drops for our guest to find huh? Gonna be a good girl and hold all my cum in you?”, Harry grunted into your ear as you whimpered against his hands. You were seeing stars and feeling butterflies in the pit of your stomach and you knew it was only a matter of time before you both came undone.” Oh baby”, you whined and your head fell down as the pressure from your stomach finally was released as your orgasm spilled out all over Harry’s dick and thighs. The gushing feeling from your orgasm and your weak whimpers and cries drove Harry overboard, burying his face in your neck and his roughly groaning as he released inside of you. The two of you stayed connected for a bit, thighs stuck together thanks to your shared orgasm with Harry’s arm wrapped around your waist supporting both of your weights up as you composed yourselves. When he finally pulled out of you, you kept every drop he gave you tucked inside your tight walls just as promised. 

“So those Pumpkin Seeds huh”

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being Diego Hargreeves’ child

Diego Hargreeves x child!reader

warnings: knifes, blood, guns, death mentions, mental hospital

a/n:

prompt: anonymous: “Hi! Could you please write a “The Umbrella Academy” Diego Hargreeves x daughter reader headcanon? I always think Diego is such a overprotective softie dad ♥️♥️”

deigo really said “?????”

how dad

but also he’d just the most loving dad anyone could ever ask for

✨it’s because he was never loved by his dad✨

“hi cutie, i love you, i love you, i love youuuuu”

he locked away all his weapons so that you couldn’t hurt yourself on them

but he always missed a few and he’d turn around and see you holding throwing knives and just FREAK OUT

“no, no, no, you may not have those! knives are for big boys like me, not babies”

“give back”

“‘give back?’ are you nuts?”

diego has conversations with lil you as if you know what the fuck he means dhshshhshs

as you got older, you became more interested in his “career”

“no, i dont care if you have powers or not! you have a bedtime, that means no vigilantism, you hear me?”

“if i say ‘no’ can i be a vigilante?”

“you know what? how about you clean up the gym for al so he doesn’t evict us?”

you did not sign up for this

you really wanted to meet your aunts and uncles, but you weren’t exactly sure they knew about you

i mean, you knew you had a cousin but everyone knew about her because aunt allison was a goshdarn celebrity

“dad, i want to meet the family!”

“no you don’t”

end of discussion

despite having a bedtime, you still watched movies late at night with your dad

he really liked marvel movies

“come on, that would never happen!”

“you come from a family of superpowered kids, a robot mom, and a monkey, and you’re upset about...a guy that shoots arrows?”

“maybe i am, what’re you gonna do about it?”

you ask about umbrella academy stories a lot, you your dad usually makes it about him

“and then i punched that guy in the face! and then i stabbed him in the leg because he was a dick! bet you’re friend’s dads arent as cool as me”

*yawning bc you’ve heard this story a million times*

you go to public school

you do have your dad’s last name

which occasionally gets recognized

“woah! wasn’t your dad a superhero?”

“i have no idea what youre talking about” :)

practicing your knife throwing while diego is away, him coming home to find his knifes stuck through various targets

so proud but he had to make sure you didn’t hurt yourself

you actually had to learn how to patch him up because he did come home a bit battered and bruised several times

“im okay, y/n. no need to freak”

“dad, there is literally blood dripping on the floor will you just sit down and stay still for five goddamn minutes?”

“woah, who the fuck taught you to cuss?”

watching the news at home when your grandfather was reportedly dead

you were actually very upset because you wanted to meet him so bad

even if he was a dick

your dad came home silent and you knew he knew

“you okay?”

“oh, yeah, im better than okay!”

finally getting the chance to meet your family

“who are you?” -allison

“im, uh, y/n. diego is my dad”

*jaw dropping*

and you know what? that happened four more times (plus ben but you didn’t get to see that)

“and you are?” -luther

“who’s the...the little one?” -klaus

“well, what do you know? diego’s a dad” -five

“don’t tell me that’s...no way” -ben

“you’re diego’s? wow, i can’t believe he didn’t tell anyone” -vanya

“i...i know who all of you are” -you

diego bragging about how perfect you are while everyone simultaneously rolls their eyes

“well, y/n, maybe one day we’ll schedule a playdate for you and claire” -allison

“‘playdate?’ how old do you think i am?...but yes i wanna meet her”

“god, you’re so much like diego, it’s unsettling”

you had been secretly training at al’s gym during your dad’s late night activities

so when trouble came your way, you were able to handle yourself pretty well

“where the hell did you learn that?”

“al showed me a few moves!”

“that old man? you’re kidding”

you met your grandmother, grace, who was tasked with keeping you safe at all times

you actually loved her sm

but there was something a bit off about her

besided the fact she was a robot

klaus snuck you out so that you two could have BoNdInG tImE

it wasn’t all bad

ben was a lil choked up that he got to meet one of his niblings

“they’re perfect”

“they just stabbed someone, buddy”

“who are you talking to?”

FIVE EVEN SCHEMED WITH YOU

“okay, y/n, i need you to curve something when i throw it, got that? right at that security guard”

“what are you throwing?”

“you’ll know when you see it, make your uncle five proud”

“IS THAT A GUN”

<3 family

running into patch!!

“hey, kid, i just saw your dad. i thought i told you to handcuff him to the radiator when you were away?”

“yeah, well, he wouldve chewed his hand off so here we are”

that was the last time you saw her :/

well, your dad was now a wanted man

“what happened to your arm?”

“no”

you actually didn’t expect this family reunion to go south like this

wait—yes you did

vanya has powers????

“i thought vanya was the one without powers?”

“yeah. so did we.”

diego straight up did not want you anywhere near that

but you, again, were his child and also fuck authority you do what you want

the vibe is almost getting shot several times

by hazel, cha cha, and “commission” guys?

going 2 ur auntie’s concert 😌✨

“y/n, hide in the bathroom and stay there until i come get you”

“dad, i love you, but no”

“y/n, i love you too, but yes”

“no”

“yes”

“NO”

“YES”

you won

but in the end (or not so much) you time traveled to...1961?

without any of your family

“this is...this is not good”

understatement of the year(s)

what was a kid like you gonna do in dallas, texas in 1961

no seriously, what

it was rough, but you managed to survive on your own

and open a paper in 1963 to find a mugshot of your dad

“son of a—”

visiting dad! (two years later)

“y/n? oh my god, y/n! shit, i missed you so much! why do you look different? you’re bigger, oh god. how long have you been here?”

“2 years, dad. you?”

his hair was so LONG

“2 months”

“christ, that’s it?!”

“i have to stop jfk from being assassinated”

“what makes you think that’s a good idea???”

“its the right thing to do, wanna help?”

“shit, i guess. as long as i dont end up here”

“no promises, people in the 60’s are crazy”

diego: 👁👄👁

you: 👀

running into five on the street soon after

“uncle five?”

“no time to talk”

“okay, asshole? i’ve been here for 2 years and you dont care?”

“two years, huh? i spent 45 years in a post apocalyptic world as a 13 year old and beyond”

“i didn’t say it was a competition, dude. you kinda dropped us all at different times. at least, me and dad. he—”

“is trying to kill lee harvey oswald, i know. come with me”

finally running into your other aunts and uncles, who were so excited to see you

you ran into their arms and they picked you off the ground and you felt closer than ever after only knowing them for 10 days

dad broke out

lila too

“im your new mom!”

“you’re what?”

diego dragged you along with him almost everywhere

he had missed you so much, but he keeps forgetting you kinda grew up without him for a while longer

meeting grandpa :)

“a grandchild, huh? how unfortunate”

“bitch”

“what did you just call me?”

“a bitch.”

your dad and basically the entire table trying to hold back laughter

reggie was stunned

cold hearted just like him <3 he didn’t know if he was offended or proud

this is so confusing

diego just disappeared off the face of the earth

and assassins were on your case

“the goddamn swedes are back oh shittt im gonna die”

“y/n, just curve their bullets”

“it’s not as easy as it sounds, klaus!”

you were doomed

theres too much to go over

apparently you died on a farm????

and then you didn’t??????

and your dad was almost apart of the commission

“hey, you okay, y/n?”

“i would like to take a nap please”

“yeah, me too”

“me three!” -klaus

yeah it was never that simple 😌💕 the end

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