#then I should probs make dinner bc it's getting a bit late

[yourmcu]

Emotional Support Mode

Pairings: Tony Stark x daughter!reader

Summary:

in which the reader is the loner, antisocial daughter of Tony Stark and the other Avengers including her father never acknowledge her presence (they thought some sort of interaction made you uncomfortable) so she becomes friends with Friday instead - Tony probs finds out and it’s gonna be all cute n fluffie once he realizes -

Word count: 2,243

a/n: hi just wanted to write fluffy tony :)) also I used they/them for friday’s pronouns

Warnings: angst n fluff, friday’s a bit more advanced (not like they aren’t already but) bc they could almost act like a literal human here.

read it on ao3!

You arrive back at the Avengers facility, shoulders slumped and just tired in general since you have a lot of homework and projects to do from school, most of them due by the end of the week. You also have exams later in the week.

“Hey, Fri,” you huff as you make your way to the elevator.

“Welcome home, Y/N. Where do you want to go?”

Yes, you're very close with the A.I that they started calling you by your first name. “To my room - and uh, will you remind me to read two chapters in my history book after I’m done with all my homework? I also have this project, I just need some measurements later, if you don’t mind.”

“Sure thing.”

“Thank you.”

It’s going to be a long night, you sigh heavily just thinking about it. Now you’re probably wondering, ‘you live with the Avengers! Why don’t you ask Tony and Bruce for help? Maybe Steve and Bucky for your History test?’

Yeah, well... you barely talk to any real person you live with. Maybe it’s you, you always thought you're making the team uncomfortable. You don’t even talk to your own father often which is kind of depressing on your part.

You love them, they’re like your extended family, but it just isn’t working out. Maybe they just don’t like you. Up to this day you still wonder why Tony took you in when you were just a baby (you were a mistake from one of his one night stands) - he had the choice not to.

“I’m assuming you zoned out again. You have arrived to your room five minutes ago.” Friday announces.

“Y-yeah sorry,” you shuffle out of the elevator and swiftly head to your bedroom, closing the door behind you.

“I also asked if I should inform Mr. Stark that you have arrived home.”

“No, no thanks. He’s busy and... probably wouldn’t care anyway,” You mutter the last part as you pile the books you need on your desk. “Can you put my study playlist on, please?”

----

“What time is it, Friday?”

“7PM. I was about to remind you to take a break.”

You get up from your chair and stretch, halfway through the last of your homework which is a two page essay. “You’re too kind, thanks pal,” when you walk out your room to head to the kitchen and grab a snack, the lounge is empty, kitchen empty,

“The team’s on a mission? I thought they had the whole week off,” you say before gulping down a water bottle.

“I checked the security footage: they left about an hour ago. Captain Rogers was talking about getting dinner.”

You put the bottle down. “Oh,” you try to mask your disappointment. This isn’t your first time being alone, they always left you here when they had a mission of course but... well, it’s not like they want you around them. “I’ll - I’ll just make myself something later, then. Not a big deal. I have to study anyway.”

Another hour later, the Avengers are back. They're all conversing happily as they pile in the lounge. Peter's rambling about upgrades for the Spiderman suit while Tony's typing away in his phone, nodding at everything he says. Everyone else is arguing about the TV channels and talking about the new restaurant they ate at.

Rhodey shifts, looking around. “Why do I feel like we forgot something?”

Natasha looks at him, waiting for him to go on.

“I assure you, I brought Mjolnir with me this time.” Thor butts in.

“No not that, what time does Y/N get home from school?” No one answers. It’s not like any of them know. It's natural that Rhodey would be worried about his goddaughter (even if they rarely talk). He turns his head to his best friend who’s now walking away with Peter, an arm around his shoulder. “Tony, where’s Y/N?”

He doesn’t hear since he has his full attention on his protégé.

“I’ll start making this tomorrow, I guess. I still have to buy materials.” You mumble to yourself, but you hope Friday's listening to everything you say just to make you feel less lonely. You swipe the hologram of the blueprint away and place the thick books in front of you.

“I would like to recommend a suitable study plan.” they state.

You rub your eyes, sighing, “I’m already halfway, I would’ve considered it earlier though.”

“This is only a recommendation, feel free to ignore it.”

You push yourself away from the desk and mutter a “go on,”, fiddling with your pen.

“Asking Mr. Rogers and Mr. Barnes would give you more details for your History examination, since the pair were originally from that time period. The same goes for Mr. Banner for your Science examination, I believe he has seven Ph.D’s, you may also approach Vision for the same topic. Mr. Stark has all the necessary materials for your project in his lab. Would you like me to-”

If only it were that easy. It should be easy, the thought alone makes you really nervous. “No, I - I appreciate the recommendation, Friday, but - I think I can do this on my own.”

“But you’re tired and it is almost midnight. I would help you myself but you specifically told me not to.”

They’re not wrong. Your eyes are starting to droop and you barely understand anything you're reading. You're also fighting back tears - why is talking to your family so hard?

“I can sense sadness. Would you like me to activate emotional support mode?”

“Yeah, okay. That sounds great right about now.”

----

“Crap. Guess we lost track of time again, kid,” Tony wipes his hands with a rag while he looks at the time on his computer. “You better get home. I’ll send May a text for keeping you this late.”

“Okay, thank you Mr. Stark. I’m just gonna use my suit-”

“No. Happy will drive you.”

Peter knew better than to argue and insist so he just nods and smiles sheepishly. A minute later Happy came ‘round to take him home.

Tony turns back around. “Friday, make a new project for me please, I’m adding minor upgrades to the Spiderman suit.”

“Not now, boss.”

Oh. He did not expect that. “Excuse me?”

“Y/N is currently opening up. I would like to give her my full, undivided attention. Please come back after fifteen minutes or so.”

Tony doesn’t exactly know how to feel about that. He never sees her outside her room anymore that he kinda forgot she existed tonight - oh fuck, they didn’t bring her to dinner with them.

“Well,” he exhales. “What is she saying?”

“That would be an invasion of privacy.”

“I’m her father-”

“Are you, sir?” Friday’s clever remark makes him stop abruptly.

It’s pretty clear that he’s been a shit father. Not only does he ignore you all the time but he treats Peter way better than his own flesh and blood. The Avengers on the other hand, they were nice people, but just didn’t understand so they try their best to get out of your way.

You were afraid of rejection, afraid to interact, because you had no idea what everyone thought of you. Did they like you? Did you make them uncomfortable? Did they want you around? What about Tony, did he really want a daughter in his life? Because you noticed he’d be better off with a son, yeah, like Peter goddamn Parker.

Tony sighs, walking out of his lab and heads to the mini bar to grab a drink. He needs to think: there's absolutely nothing wrong about you, he just didn’t do his job right, you thought he didn’t care, you thought nobody did. Even Friday is turning against him, doing a better job of comforting and being there for you.

“God, I’m such an asshole,” he mutters to himself, rubbing his forehead. He drinks his last shot and heads to the kitchen. “She still awake?” He calls out.

“She is.” Friday has a bitter tone.

He's hesitant to ask again, feeling really bad for not knowing this simple question - “what’s her favorite beverage?”

----

“How do you feel?”

You sniffle. “Well y’know, better than before. I should probably go to sleep. Thanks, Fri.”

“You’re welcome. Also, Mr. Stark is outside your door.”

“W-what?” You put away your books and straighten up, rubbing your damp eyes. “You’re serious? Okay, uh, let him in?” It's more of a question.

“Alright.”

You turn to face your desk as Tony enters the room, holding two steaming mugs. He sits at the end of your bed, just right next to the chair you're sitting on. “Hi,” he gives you a small smile and hands you a mug.

What’s the occasion?

“What’s this?” You ask quietly before taking the mug from his hands. Tony's being gentle and soft, it's odd but you’re not complaining.

“Green tea with honey. I... I thought I saw you make that stuff once.” He says, not mentioning the fact that Friday told him that.

“Oh, well, yeah,” you take a small sip. He added a bit too much honey but other than that it was good. “I thought you preferred coffee, though,”

Tony shrugs, his eyes glistening when he looks at you. “Wouldn’t hurt to try something new.”

“Did - did you want something, Dad?” You always found yourself awkward, couldn’t even make conversation with someone for long, always wanted to get straight to the point so it could be over with.

He looks like he wants to say something but he just averts his gaze to you, his hands, the floor, then suddenly he leans in and hugs you. Your feel your heart swell and body warm up, it’s a new sensation for you after all, you rarely get hugs from people. “I’m sorry,” he whispers. “For everything. I’m such a bad dad, I don’t deserve you. I even forgot you when we went out to dinner.”

“You don’t have to be sorry for anything. I had loads of stuff to do earlier anyway, so, but yeah I was just - I just overreact, I’m sensitive. I don’t blame you and the others for not liking me, I know there’s nothing like-able about me, I’m not like Peter-” You ramble, tears now leaving your eyes again.

“Sweetheart, don’t say that,” Tony says as he pulls you closer to him, head resting against his chest while he rubs your back comfortably. “Y/N Stark, you are smart, brilliant - I was just an ass for not acknowledging that.”

“I know you’re just saying that to-”

“Oh, but I’m not,” he now places his hands on your shoulders, getting you to look at him. “Tell me who built their first engine when they were eight?”

You blush, “Dad-”

“No, come on, I wanna hear it.”

“I did.”

“Yes you did. And who made a completely functioning robot at their middle school science fair that blew all the teacher’s minds?”

You’re trying to hide a smile, recalling the memory,  “I did.”

“And who,” Tony gets up and walks to the bulky looking thing that you covered with a sheet, pulling it off, “is currently building a computer from scratch?”

“Dad! That’s still a work in progress,” he messily places the sheet back and chuckles.

“My point is, you’re a clever and talented girl, Y/N. Don’t bring yourself down. And you don’t have to be shy around your family, those idiots have been dying to get to know you but since you don’t talk much... they don’t want to force it. We love you,” he says. “I hope you forgive me ‘cause I really wanna make it up to you. I’m not calling Peter in for a few weeks.” Tony sits down beside you again.

You couldn’t believe he’d do that for you. “You don’t have to, if you need him for something then-”

“-then you could help me instead, if you’re up for it.”

“I’m really sorry for being such a lonely freak,” you yawn, getting back into Tony’s open arms. “I love you.”

Tony tucks you in and lies down beside you, “I love you tons, kiddo.”

You snuggle into his chest, feeling his steady breathing while he rests his chin above your head.

----

It's morning. The Avengers are gathered at your open bedroom door.

“Are you getting all of this, Friday?”

“Yes, Ms. Romanoff.”

“Steve turn that shuttering sound down!” Natasha hisses at the super soldier who's doing his task, taking pictures.

Steve almost drops the phone and has Bruce fix the volume for him.

They’re all watching you and Tony cuddle together, still fast asleep.

“Do we have to stay here until they wake up?”

“Unless you have a great way of waking them up, yes. Now shut up.”

“If you think about it we definitely look creepy right now.” Sam comments.

“It’s their fault for having the door wide open all night!” Clint says.

Tony's actually awake the whole time, listening to them bickering. “You have three seconds to get the hell out of here before I make all of you polish my suits.” With that, the team races down the hall, pushing each other to get away first like literal children.

[mashiraostail]

who do u think r the biggest simps??

eigFJKD THIS ASK IS SO FUNNY TO ME THANK U PUT IN ORDER FROM MOST TO LEAST SIMP LIKE I PROB FORGOT PPL BC ITS LIKE LATE LATE BUT I WANTED TO WRITE THIS AHSLSEDS

1.) Hizashi: THIS MAN IS SUCH A SIMP IT’S PRESENT MIC I DON’T CARE EVEN A LITTLE BIT THIS MAN IS SUCH A FUCKING SIMP!!! I can’t explain it honestly i just...i can so picture him being the biggest idiot for his s/o he’s always looking at pics of them and staring at them when they’re around and he’s gonna compliment everything they do period. Like aw the way you sit is so cute, aw I love how you twirl pencils with your fingers when you’re trying to focus, aw your stutter is precious. And god even a tiny CRUMB of kindness from you will put him on cloud nine. Oh you like his jacket?? Okay, he can happily die now. He has pretty eyes? Excuse him he has to go cry in the bathroom. The sappier you get the easier it is to get your way. . He gives so many gifts, little stupid things that make him think of his s/o but also big extravagant gifts tht always leave them totally flustered and embarrassed. Biggest simp. Simp of the year. 

2.) Sekijiro- Sorry but.. Vlad king supremacy?? Idk why he’s such a respectful simp I just get those vibes from him. Like he’ll do anything his s/o asks, need something lifted? Ok he’ll be there in 5 minutes. Oh need help reaching something? Sure thing whatever you need. Had a bad day? Oh no well come sit here with me and we can talk about it or watch your favorite movie if you don’t wanna yet! This man loves love, if he gets hurt on the job, or has a bad day all he’s gonna wanna do is curl up with you and get all the kisses and loves and back rubs. If he’s having a bad day he’s def gonna sit around daydreaming about you. His phone bg is def either a pic of you together or just a pic of you, he has a lot of pics of you and he enjoys them very much. It’s always your way, you have to beg him to just tell you what he wants sometimes, and no ‘whatever you want babe’ isn’t a valid answer!!! sorry not sorry about it!! 

3. Toshinori- GOOODDDDD THIS MAN IS A SIMP. He’s totally stupid in love w his s/o the minute they meet. He’s all blushy and stupid and smiley at them and he’s always paying little tiny thoughtless compliments like ‘oh you have really nice hands’ or ‘you’re always so helpful (: I’m so lucky to get to work with you!’ He’s just happy to be around his s/o and he’ll do whatever they want. Shopping? Sure he’ll tag along. Got a bunch of boring errands to run? He’ll keep you company. Need to do a ton of house work? He can help! He also loves giving small gifts, and any matching thing on the planet will make his heart soar, rings of course, but also bracelets, key chains, mugs anything this man will want it. If you say a song reminded you of him he will listen to it on loop for weeks. He’s totally fantastically infatuated and it’s such obvious puppy love too.

4. Taishiro Toyomitsu- PLEASE again this man is a major simp gentleman. He holds doors he gets you flowers he cooks you dinner he talks about you all the time. Seriously all the time. Tamaki probably knows your whole life story by now all he does is brag about you. Complete a slightly difficult task? Everyone Taishiro interacts with is gonna know it. Even the villains. If he ever does an interview you’re getting brought up. He doesn’t care how much he has to bend over backward to do it, he’s gonna talk about you or he’ll perish. When you’re together it’s kisses and hugs all the time, he barely ever walks by without giving you some form of kiss, and god the amount of times this man says ‘i love you’ in one day, hell one hour, should be illegal. 

5. Kugo Sakamata- he’s not a super simp BUT he is still a simp, and the nicer you are to him the more simpish he becomes. If you have a normal comfortable give and take dynamic that’s good with him, but if you’re ever very affectionate with him he’ll be total putty in your hands. The longer you’re together the worse it gets. He loves gift-giving and there truly is nothing you can’t have. If you want it then it’s your’s Kugo doesn’t care, why would he? If it’ll make you happy then you can have as many as you want. So all in all, may not be a super simp at first but you can def mold him into one. 

6. Keigo Takami- He doesn’t simp at all in the beginning, he’s actually an annoying little turd. But the longer he spends with you the more infatuated he becomes until eventually it feels like going 6 hours without a kiss from you is majorly pushing it. Tokoyami has heard about every accomplishment you’ve ever made from your job to how quickly you did the dishes the night before. He has seen a thousand photos of you and probably knows you really well if he for whatever reason hasn’t met you. Because Keigo is always stopping to visit on patrols, or begging you to come to see him at the agency for lunch or just a quick hello if you’re going to be passing through. When he gets to know you all he wants to do is make you feel good.

7. Aizawa Shouta- people probably wanted him higher on this list but idk he doesn’t scream simp to me. In public he def does NOT simp, he might stare at you a little too long if he isn’t expecting to see you and he’ll always smile back if you smile at him but don’t expect him to plaster pictures of you everywhere and constantly talk about how much he loves you because that isn’t his style. In PRIVATE though?? This man can simp for the right cause. And sir can this man SIMP. What do you want? A bath? Okay I can do that. Your favorite food? Sure that’s easy. Massage? You don’t even have to ask! He likes the effect he has on you, watching you get flustered and melt at his affection is something he starts to really enjoy the longer the pair of you stay together. 

8. Mirai Sasaki- At first he doesn't simp, but once you hit a few milestones he’ll start. He likes making you laugh, and seeing your smile is at the top of his priority list, he has tons of photos of you smiling and if anyone is having a bad day he’ll think of some silly story about you to tell to cheer them up. Like others, his intern, Mirio, has heard all about you and probably knows you really well. He probably made it a point to introduce you after working with Mirio for a while. Mirio probably sees you as a package deal at this point. 

9.Nemuri Kayama- Girl does NOT simp. You simp for her  and you like it that way, periodsm!!! No actually though at first she also doesn’t simp at all, she doesn’t care, she can have pretty much anyone she wants so if you don’t like her then you can pack it up and find someone else. But the longer you stay with her the more she starts to warm up to it, she likes seeing you happy, so going the extra mile even if it is a bit much for her is something she’s going to start doing more and more. She’ll remember all your favorite things and give you random gifts. She’ll take lots of photos of you to keep for herself  and she’ll send you plenty of her own. She starts to also find a lot of comfort in you and will be looking for ways to spend time with you.

10. Enji Todoroki- I aint explaining this. Mans aint no simp. 

[holyjareau]

imo, the show was often unilaterally focused on Piper, but only on what she could do for others (Piper the wife and Piper the mother) rather than who she was as a person. Piper's individual characterization was lost sometime around s5 as soon as she got pregnant, and being a mother and wife pretty much became her sole defining characteristic for the rest of the series. I would be very interested to hear what you define as Piper's mental issues/trauma, bc as you say it doesn't get said enough

this has been in my inbox forever and i’m just getting around to it so my apologies.

but okay. so. yes. i think a lot of tv shows fall into this weird place where like. all of their characters begin with these kinda vague personalities because you’re just getting to know them. and as the show goes on, you pick up more pieces and stuff . and that’s great. that’s interesting and entertaining and it takes you on a journey and all. but often what happens is many shows fall into this pit where writers either get lazy, they change, or whatever, and the actors are tired of playing the part or whatever . and like. the characters become like. caricatures of themselves. and it just gets exhausting to watch because they’re not like. real people anymore.

Piper's individual characterization

so now for the charmed thing. so from the beginning. i have loved piper. like she’s the middle sister, overlooked, quiet, reserved, pessimistic but also realistic, gentle, thoughtful, all that. we see right away that she loves to cook .. she’s so happy her family is back together. she kept in touch with phoebe behind prue’s back. but she’s loyal to the both of them. her first idea was to have a reunion dinner when phoebe came home. she’s literally so cute n she deserves a hug. but no like. as we go on, we see that she wants to be good, she wants a stable life with no more loss, she Loves Love !! like. she wants to just be happy , open her own restaurant n just cook. she’s also so shy .. definitely panicky and anxious. and she doesn’t trust herself. she’s skeptical of everything, and she’s very thoughtful when it comes to big situations. even in the early days with leo and into season 2, she mentioned a few things about like “i’ve been thinking a lot about this...” and you can see she’s good at communicating with people. she’s also got these other dimensions to her like . she is interested in lots of cuisine types, she loves to read (and is a camus fan !!) , she drives a jeep (which i wanna know how she got bc i have questions), when she found out she was a witch her first thought was just . i need to go and see if i am still a good person . and she went to church. prue was surprised to learn that piper enjoys knitting. in the early seasons (especially mid-late season 3) we saw her with her plants and all. she’s just this natural peacekeeper. but like. we literally got a crying scene in the second episode because she was so conflicted about this. and she’s such a deep and complex character that i fell in love with so fast . and like . literally my favourite fictional character to exist . genuinely holly breathed so much life into piper . anyway . so. here’s the thing.

being a mother and wife pretty much became her sole defining characteristic for the rest of the series

like. piper was who i described above. and like . i kinda think . a bit. that like . the writers . especially in s4 . were like . hmm well  . she’s just lost prue, she’s gonna be grieving . and like we need more for her. so. she’s been married to leo for the better part of a year, been with him for like . 3 years. so. let’s maybe consider giving them a kid but not just yet . just Content kinda stuff. so anyway they drop little hints in here and there starting in like . 4x07 i think? which . brain drain really paid the rent . fully just. holly did so well. but like. that ep was just. a neat way of looking into her mind and seeing the horrors of manipulation and gaslighting and everything . and of course holly knocked it out of the park. but at that point, they were kinda like . hmm . kids ? and they started toying with the idea, having piper and leo consider it, talk about it, they had paige and phoebe ask about it , all of that good stuff. as you do. made for some funny tv at some points. and like . i really, really Get It . when piper’s like . ahh the baby wouldn’t be safe around here !!!! like. Girl, Valid . your sister just died and like . you went on forever about how she was The Most Powerful One . The Strongest One . and yet she still died . so she’s like ??? am i next ?? and like obv it doesn’t make sense for her to jump on this train of like . i’m gonna have a kid !!!! so she’s really valid in her thought process there. and like. after having wyatt . i think the writers really . idk. couldn’t do waaay too much with her character anymore because i feel like . to an extent, anything she does will be scrutinized bc i’m not just . saying this . i rlly feel like sometimes piper’s the easiest to hate. like idk why but i loved her. but anyway. if she stays at home with wyatt and doesn’t wanna fight demons n all . then she’s selfish towards her sisters n she’s awful n prue wouldn’t have let her do that !!!! etc . but if she fought demons it’s like . uh sweetie you have a child . really ??? why put yourself in a situation that might have you ending up like patty 2.0 ... bc i could do a Whole post on how patty’s situation messed piper up the most. but anyway.

it’s the way i’m fully rambling so if you’re reading this . i love you . anyway okay . so . i think in a tv show you’ve gotta kinda check boxes. the best tv shows have characters you see yourself in . you relate to them. you hear them and understand their decisions and actions and thoughts. the things they do just makes sense 2 you. so like. with prue, anyone married to their job could relate to her. any oldest sibling could see themselves in her, you know ? she was hard-working, committed, logical, protective. and with phoebe, anyone who couldn’t “settle down” in their early 20s related 2 her, anyone who felt like the outcast of the family, the “screw-up” .. right. makes sense. she was so kind, caring, had-your-back kinda girl. we all love those. paige was like . the new kid, trying to fit in, creative, curious, and definitely a lifelong learner. and then there’s piper who was shy, resistant, really just wanted to be normal. and loved. and i think everyone could kinda identify with at least one of the sisters regardless of where you stood in your own family. so as the show went on, it’s like . they still want you to keep watching and keep being able to identify with them because it’s not like they’re humans with normal lives so they’ve already kinda lowkey got that going against them . so their more “human” and normal lives... we’ve gotta be able to identify with them to be able to invest time. so they had prue always working, having trouble balancing love and work, looking out for her family. we had phoebe kinda living her life, getting her career going, then kinda wanting a family. we had paige learning magic and being super interested and involved and then getting married. and we had piper who had her career pretty early on, got married, and had kids. like. i think the big thing is the marriage and kids. and when you’re a mother . the only mother really in the show, the show lowkey centres around you . like. for starters, the show usually is in the manor, and if you’re a mother, you’re very likely at home, esp with young kids. so i think that alone kinda was like . huh yeah . won’t see piper out waaay too much anymore i guess !!! but no like . there’s That. that’s kinda. the thing that really can’t change with the show . like. piper’s got kids now and a husband and very, very likely . her life will be centred around her home. which. listen she’s wanted that i think - the stability . she’s wanted that forever. and this is the form it came in. but i should stop rambling here and cut to the point .

Piper's mental issues/trauma

disclaimer: i’m not diagnosing her, i’m just speculating based off of my own experiences with mental health

so. okay. very early on. we saw that anxiety. like. yes . she was nervous about like a whole new life experience . or whatever we’re gonna call it when you figure out you’re a witch . but like she was Anxious . like. crying in the attic over being a bad person . needing phoebe to talk her down by telling her she’s such a caring person, she’s always doing things for other people . and then there’s the whole anxiety that comes with. my family’s falling apart because my sisters are fighting so i use really awkward methods of getting out of things . like using humour as a coping mechanism !!! which. gave us some iconic one-liners. but that’s beside the point . anyway. point is. early on, that anxiety was there. there’s an ep in season 1 where she’s literally entering a panic attack in her kitchen and phoebe’s using a menu to cool her down. like. Yikes! and then she’s just. her awkward self around everyone but that’s endearing and is just part of her personality . and i think a lot of the anxiety stemmed from childhood. we heard a few times about how prue and phoebe had boyfriends growing up, were always pretty and popular and all. phoebe was popular, too, just, in the other crowd. but nonetheless, piper faded into the background, doing well in math - well enough to go off and be a banker . and like. she sacrificed a lot for grams. she stayed in san francisco ... we all know the girl had the marks for stanford or something . like. though . still, i think she liked the stability of home and prob would’ve stayed . but in 3x17 she’s all !!! grams !!! the doctor said no caffeine !!! and when grams was taking the pic of them outside and she had an episode , piper was all !!!! shallow breaths !!! like. it was clear piper was the one taking her to the appointments and footing the bill. like. she literally became a banker just bc it had benefits n stuff. like. poor girl really thought . anyway that’s a whole spiral. but no. like she really sacrificed The Most for her family and everyone still thought she was selfish for wanting to move out . when like back then grams was literally ... sick ... and prue was out here moving out and phoebe was nowhere to be found . so. that . definitely would have added to her anxiety about even wanting to do anything for herself because she’ll be perceived as selfish in a heartbeat. even if it’s not Mean . it’s just. she’d never risk it. but there’s the anxiety. there are a few lil things here n there about how she gets nervous n stuff, she represses things (3x07 i think was where phoebe said piper represses her anger n just sucks it up n does whatever) . she literally cancelled her doctor’s appointment Twice . anyway. it still angers me. then in season 7 . patty and victor were like . oh she had night terrors that were so bad we took her to the doctor ! and i just ... honey . baby. she thought she caused the divorce. at 4? 5? she watched victor leave on her 5th birthday, watched a demon attack her, grams, and victor. prue said she didn’t cry at patty’s funeral and i’ll make a safe bet that piper did. and i think growing up without patty was strange for sure. prue had more memories and phoebe had none. and piper had fragments of this person everyone loved . and she was stuck between knowing her and not knowing her. and when patty was sent to her for her wedding day, (as well as in 1x17) . both times when patty hugged them . prue and phoebe hugged her, eyes closed n all. while piper was on the outside, eyes open . looking numb as all hell . and you know. i rlly think she was Giving Them That because phoebe didn’t get her and prue kinda . in a way. lost more of her . if that makes sense ?? and i just. patty really was like . they sent me to You. and 5 seconds later . piper’s like . they sent mom to Us !!! and it’s that idea of sacrifice and never having anything for yourself because she was never just . given anything for herself . everything in her life has been a sacrifice and as a mother, that’s perpetuated. she can assume that role with more of a purpose . like. people won’t really feel sorry for her now as the “forgotten” sister, they won’t try and coddle her or anything. and another thing. control. piper craved stability and control. i think while cooking was something she loved, it also gave her a lot of control . she could control her whole kitchen . even in season 8 .. maybe vaya con leos actually . leo mentioned how much piper craves control. and the control motif makes sense with her powers too. like. piper craved control so much that her powers allowed her to control things down to the atom. so there’s the whole anxiety and needing to control things to ease her anxiety and all. there’s That whole thing.

and then we get to the infamous season 5 fearless spell . ms girl really sat in the attic just writing everything on the wall and it’s the way i screenshotted it and like . zoomed in and tried deciphering it . and like . there’s words like “stop” and i think “sister” is in there a few times, so is “loss” or “lost”. when i watch it next i’ll grab a cap because it’s . disturbing. girl was so scared . literally was writing a spell to get rid of her fears . she also writes Fear . as in. capital F . and like. yeah that’s deep but i do it too like i emphasize words with a capital letter . and like holly marie combs might just have quirky n fun writing but like ... capital F . for Fear. for real . that’s . trauma !!! and she also was having panic attacks at the beginning of season 5. let’s not forget those. which ... we should’ve gotten more of an explanation for . i hope that girl is getting help bc she was Going Through It . and in season 7 when zankou reads her diary . firstly. we Knew this girl kept a diary like . for Sure . she did. and just that little excerpt of when prue died . oops. i’d pay big money to see the rest because again i just think she’s got such a complex mind and like. i’d be so interested to read that. and i think everything re: prue is just Awful for her. like . idk if this is just something quirky i noticed but obv we know prue died in may 2001 . but at the end of 4x03, when piper goes 2 paige’s work 2 bring her muffins !! soft !!! the calendar on one of the desks reads july 2001 ... and i really just. ms girl. i Know they prob just filmed the ep in july but it honestly tracks that she’d be so awfully upset about everything and just . barely able to do anything but cook . for 2 months. like. honey. baby. i wanted 2 just cuddle her bc she was so sad. and like. she tells paige she’s having “good hours” and “not so good hours” . she’s going by the Hour . by the Hour . just. need i say more . i’m so . but no like. if anything like i could see her having like . depression where she’s high-functioning and like just . walking depression i guess ?? like . not even after prue. i think in general. like . she definitely has a melancholic temperament and a type 6 enneagram (the skeptic). that’s For Sure . but i think. just. she’s always just had time to think bc she’s always alone, reading, knitting, cooking, tending to her plants, all that. and i just . think. she has issues. and i think prue knew that. of all people. and i think her knowing that . and then dying. destroyed piper. she lost the last person that was truly a constant in her life . like they shared a roof over their heads forever. and then she was just . gone . and piper was suddenly left to pick up the pieces . and become the oldest sister . and i’m So glad she didn’t fully assume her personality. i’m glad she stayed as piper . just. she’s more cynical and snarky and defensive and cold and that’s okay. she’s hurting. she’s always gonna hurt . and i think it makes her human . she’s pessimistic and sad and has a short fuse at times . but just. again. i love her to bits and i think those issues make her more relatable for me. because while many like to say she became selfish and a negative person and just . awful to be around . i’d say the opposite . i won’t sit and apologize or justify things. also i don’t think piper’s done anything wrong . i just think she’s hurt. she’s been wronged so many times. and she’s .... scared. i think she’s scared . and in season 5 “sympathy for the demon” we learn her true biggest fear is her happiness being stolen away. and like . it’s not that she’s scared she won’t be happy. she’s scared all of the good she’s got will be taken from her . and that’s . terrifying . so . i see why she’s so snarky and bitter and tired and all . she’s terrified of things being taken from her like they have been her whole life. and as i watch the show i really like to just keep that in mind as i get further and further in because yes. she did become a mother and a wife and we saw her arguing with leo a lot and their marriage falling apart and That Whole Era . we saw how it kind of took over her life but i think it happens . i think she even said at one point . i’ve been so many things to so many people, i don’t know who i am anymore . and i think it sums her up perfectly. she doesn’t know who she is because she’s someone to everyone . she’s just. nobody to herself except this scared little girl who just wants Something . Anything . to make sense . some Stability . and her babies, her husband, and her sisters . are all she has for that idea of stability to make sense in her mind. and it was an easy hole to fall into - the Mother - but i think she jumped in. because at the Very Least . nobody could take that title away from her . regardless of how hard they tried .

[jimlingss]

Dear Miss Kina, it's me again! First of all, congratulations on finishing your final fanfic on this blog! It was immensely what i've been waiting and hoped for. You definitely played with my heart till the very end! It's kind of like - with every fic you've released till now from Seokjin fics to Jungkook fics - every one of them are all so perfectly crafted, every member gets so written well that sometimes time flies so fast when im reading it!

I waited, and read The End for like two hours? And it was really worth it (im wriitng this at like 3am too) like damn i was pausing every second because I was just trying to decipher whatever was happening in each scene, it was all a lot to take in because with each scenario created with the boys, it almost felt like six whole fics crammed into one! The scrollbar was really small n wasn't moving at ALL when i was reading the first few parts and i was like, "wait this feels more like a 60k than a 31k ㅠㅠ" ??? Like how??? But i was smiling as i was reading through the whole thing, to find out it was a Jin centered fic -- and honestly all of your Jin fics are godtier -- i was like "YES YES YES OMG YES I THINK I KNOW WHERE THIS IS GOING" n it was real fun to guess which member went next and how the scenario would turn out.

N i really loved how smooth u incorporated both oc and Jin during each scenario, their bickering was so fun and their moments made me go "AWW WTF I WISH I WAS OC ATM" AND OMFG especially that parf where ic asks jin if he ever knew her before everything happened n the whole "like you love me" scene went down -- my mouth was WIDE open i was tearing up and i screamed so loud lmaooo omg ur like the only writer to actually make me react so violently about that ○_○ n when the scene wherein oc wakes up and doesnt see jin and rushes out, the way you wrote it, you sense the urgency and the dishevelled/rampant thoughts of hers when she sees seokjin on the floor bleeding like that and all the way to the hospital scene where she cant even talk despite feeling so sick DAMN i cant even stop staring at the screen even tho my head hurts from being awake all night (but honestly ur worth it)

Like if i had to rank the individual realities where reader ended up with, i think the one i got sadder for was the Taehyung reality -- the oc in that universe couldn't even have time for herself n gradually drowned in becoming a mother and a wife n all i could think of was "tae u should at least treat your wife >:((" n with Yoongi's i was like "whut's happening," and instead of being hurt about it i for no reason started to discuss my thoughts onto thin air "i dont want a partner like yoongi, they dont have time for e/o n thats kinda sad" n thats where i really started to guess maybe every scenario has a major downside but i had to figure it out. N then with Hoseok n Joon's i felt my heart crack a lil bit bc the oc's insecurities in that part (she felt world's apart to hobi n then inferior to joon) i was like...this is me n I DIDNT WANNA FEEL THAT WAY IN A RELATIONSHIP so then again i started to talk to myself looool. Then we have Jimin's that got me like damn :(( thats kind of harsh -- being in a reality with oc in the picture removes the fact that jimin had a stable life. And i guess with every scene you made with all members (did that intend to give me life lessons or sum uhh)

And last but not least, Jungkook's! Not gonna lie, i also thought he was gonna cheat on oc bc she mentioned she was a racer, thats the reason he was late to her bday dinner, but then the dots started to connect when she mentioned why jin looked solemn in the hospital (re: everything that i mentioned a paragraph or two before)

I do know this was loosely based on TATBILB, but as i was reading through it i found so many similarities to it. Like the BTS UNIVERSE incorporated in where Jin goes back in the last to try and desperately change the future where he is not there in order to stop people from getting hurt. And also Orange (one of my fav mangas) where Naho received letters (along with her friends) from her alternate self to save Kakeru from committing suicide, and it had the happy ending too wherein she stopped him from getting right in front the truck (tho there were mistakes that she didnt do correctly)

And that's all 😭🤧 im sorry if this ask was really long. But i wanted to say thank you for creating all of these wonderful stories! They made my day n i could still rmember finding out about you as a baby army myself so i could say you were part of my journey as a new army msksksksk. It was such a great fun time to be waiting for new fics to drop, new chapters released and announcements and funny asks to scroll through on my tl! I do hope you do well in whatever you embark on from now on and hey you'll finally get to publish a book! And i'll most likely read that too ^^ happy 5 years to the blog^^ thank you user Jimlingss, thank you Kina!

omg thank you for this amount of feedback and your extensive praise, I feel undeserving of it hahaha anyway, thank you for taking your time to enjoy the end. honestly, I was aiming for it to be a 50k fic to just really indulge you all as my last story. But as I was writing it, it turned out muuuch shorter to my exasperation. but it still stands as my longest oneshot and I think it ended up pretty great in spite of being so much lower than my intial word count goal. that being said, I'm glad it felt long to you!!

Also thank you for giving me a run down on your thoughts on the other timelines LOL it was really fun for me to think about it as well and consider what OC and Jin would've chosen had they chosen. While each had their downsides, some of them they liked more than others. since you indulged me so much with such a long message, I'll indulge you as well....OC's choices prob would've been JK > Tae > Joon > Hobi > Yoongi > Jimin. While Jin (if he could make the choice for her), it would've been Joon > Tae > Yoongi > Hobi > Jimin > JK.

I came up with the whole idea of the end. while watching TATBILB cause I thought this whole alternative reality worlds was gonna happen but nope, they took a much different direction lol and I'm happy to hear you mention Orange bc that was one fantastic manga I read!! Personally, I find the end. to be the love child between The Truth Between Us and The Seven Kinds of Love (with a sprinkle of Seven Seconds in Heaven) hahha there's definitely elements of pre-existing stories to this guy but I don't mind so much since it feels like almost a call back to them :')

Anyway thank you for the love and encouragement!! I'm sending well wishes to you too!!

[conniecaserole]

Hank and Larry hcs

ok so hank says be first met larry at a party he and his wife came into town for

-the party is a retirement party of an old colleague of hank (math teacher hank 🥺)

-his wife is a dolled up and excited bc they left the kids at home with her mother and they booked a hotel in the city so they could have a nice night

-larry’s mother knows the colleague maybe the wife of the colleague and they mention needing someone to take photos at the party so she volunteers larry

-larry initially is like nahh bc he mainly does fashion photography not party photos but he decides to do it for the money and he figures he might find someone to hook up with at the party

-hank notices larry bc how could you not he is wearing the skinniest pants ever

-his wife mentions how cute larry is and hank is like shit she knows i was looking but she doesn’t say anything else so he is like cool

-he feels bad for looking at a guy while his wife is right next to him but he also wishes she hadn’t come bc maybe he would have been able to talk to the guy

-larry comes up to their table to take pictures, hank can’t talk bc larry is so beautiful, larry teases him, they introduce themselves and then larry moves on

-hank watches him go to another table where larry bends down to pick something up aka showing his ass and then turns around to give hank a wink

-larry figures hank is a closet case and has fun messing with him but doesn’t think hank has the nerve to flirt/make a move directly

-party is nearing the end and hank’s wife has gone back to the hotel bc she wasn’t feeling good (hank is secretly thrilled) he tells her he needs to talk to people or something so he stays

-most people have left when hank goes up to larry while he is packing up

-they talk blah blah

-larry asks where hank’s wife is

-larry tells hank he needs to get something in the backroom and indicates hank should follow him

-hank waits a few seconds and then follows him

-larry figures that hank is super inexperienced and nervous so he thinks he is going to have to show him the ropes

-hank tho had been hooking up with guys prior to meeting larry so he knew his stuff

-they get down to business

-larry is shocked at how good hank is

-they banter

-they then finish. blah blah. its a bit awkward as they get redressed

-larry decides to give hank his card if he is ever back in the city, which is something larry never does. he usually is a one time type of guy maybe if he sees them again he’ll do it but he has never gone out seeking a second time with someone directly

-he figures that it’s not a big deal (it is) bc hank probs won’t ever call him but he secretly hopes he will bc damn hank is fine

-hank goes back to the hotel, takes shower, his wife is thankfully is asleep

-hank goes to bed planning another trip back into the city

-ok so a few weeks past from the first meeting, hank has to go into the city for something (idk what a math teacher has to do in the city but there is something)

-he tells his wife he is going in on friday and staying until saturday so he books a hotel

-hank is nervous to call larry but he does

-larry senses that hank is nervous so he teases him a bit

“why are you calling me, hank?”

“um, i’m going to be in new york this friday. you said i could call you if i ever came back?”

“what hotel?”

-hank gives larry the hotel name and a time

-blah blah its friday, they both get to the hotel, blah blah

-they banter, they get down to it

-larry has a rule abt never staying over for anyone he hooks up with so after they finish he gets up to leave

-hank is a bit upset but its not like he has any experience with this type of things, he mainly would go to clubs or something to hook up with guys. he never did the hotel thing until larry

-larry leaves

-they get a routine of this with hank coming in on the weekend, larry coming over but never staying the night

-at first it was just physical, right when larry would come over they’d do it

-but then they started to prolong it with larry asking hank abt his week and hank asking him abt his photography. never super deep stuff

-one weekend when hank arrives at the hotel, he gets a call from larry saying he woke up feeling sick and he cant come

-hank is bummed bc he was of course looking forward to seeing larry but he decides to bring larry some soup

-he knows where larry lives bc one night it was raining super bad and since larry still didn’t want to spend the night, hank drove him home

-hank gets soup and heads to the apt

-he is worried that larry might be lying and that he could be with another guy

-hank knows larry is not exclusive with him

-he notices all the marks on larry’s skin, marks he didn’t make

-hank doesn’t like it but he likes larry

-when he knocks, larry opens up the door and defo looks sick

-he is shocked that hank came

“what are you doing here?”

“i brought you soup”

-larry invites hank in and takes the soup

-larry reminds him that he is sick and cant do any sexual stuff and hank is like ok?? thats not why im here

-larry is confused, he hasn’t ever just hung out(no sex) with someone he was sleeping with. it was too couple like

-they end up talking (abt their past and family) and watching tv and its nice

-larry falls asleep on hank’s shoulder

-it gets late and hank wants to respect larry’s choice not to ever sleep over so he wakes him up and gets ready to leave

-larry tho asks him if he wanted to stay (this is big for him but he tries to ignore it)

-hank does

-from then on, hank stops booking hotels and instead heads straight to larry’s apt and stays over

-larry’s apt is your typical artist shithole but it works

-sometimes larry makes hank dinner (he tells himself that its just bc hank might be hungry from the drive)

-sometimes they just talk and not have sex

-larry stops going to the baths/clubs the days leading up to hank’s visits (he still goes but not on those days). he knows hank doesn’t like seeing other guys’ marks on larry’s skin so he tries to not to do it

-and if he lets hank give him marks well its bc hank wants to (and larry likes it but he would never admit that to anyone)

-this is the longest larry has slept with the same person and its not a big deal (it is)

-after a few more months of this larry forgets that it is harold’s birthday on the day hank was supposed to come

-he doesn’t want to miss the birthday party but he also doesn’t want to cancel on hank (hank’s wife has been a bit more suspicious so they had to cut down on the number of visits)

-larry decides to fuck it and takes hank to the birthday party

-emory, michael, bernard, harold and some other friends are there

-they are lowkey shook bc they know that larry  has never stayed with the same guy

-they are also shook that hank is married

-michael drinks and decides to confront hank and tells him abt larry, that he will never settle, that he will always want more, and that he is sleeping with other guys behind hank’s back

-hank knows all of this but it still hurts

-emory flirts with hank while larry is talking to someone else

-larry notices this and finds himself getting jealous. its not like emory and hank are making out or anything but emory has his hand on hank’s arm and hank is laughing

-larry walks over and asks hank if he wants to go home (yes larry has started to refer to his home as just home for him and hank)

-emory doesn’t miss this interaction and will later tease larry the next time he sees him

-everyone likes hank (and hank likes them, he feels comfortable with them) and larry begins to invite hank over when he is hanging out with them

[simpingforseijoh]

i'm soft, so have some collegeau!bokuoi headcanons :>

bokuoi as roomates is basically just bokuto being an energetic bean on and off court and oikawa unintentionally feeling really soft for the owl boy

honestly, on court these two get along so well but WOW is okis unprepared for the amount of energy he has in general. bokuto dragging him around and he's so mf tired but goes a long with it bc he's happy and probably can't handle emo mode rn

bokuto being really forgetful and oikawa on his case like " yes the great oikawa-san " has come to your rescue 24/7

despite being shit at taking care of himself, i definitely think oikawa knows how to cook bc he has to take care of his body yknow. it's probably really rare but he probably ends up cooking a bit more than he'd like just bc he doesn't trust bokuto to eat healthy every once in a while

i think we've already established that oikawa has a thing for arms and bokuto is no exception. if he gets a bunch of sleeveless shirts from oikawa just don't question it

bokuto making sure oikawa takes breaks and has fun for a while. oikawa strikes me as someone that actually gets good grades and probably works his ass off all the time so bo makes it his mission to drag him away from textbooks every once in a while

oikuro bromance bc they both love bokuto

oikawa's one sided rivalry ( it's mostly a healthy one guys i promise ) with akaashi bc bokuto always talks about his sets and he'd never admit it, but he's a LITTLE jealous

oikawa gets bokuto on that alien grinds and in turn ends up knowing a lot more about owls than he likes bc bo asks him to watch documentaries with him and he just can't say no

oikawa attempting to fix bokutos unnaturally soft hair and utterly fails each time. he has to be consoled after okay

they!! have!! movie!! nights!!

overall just soft

okay, okay so i'm pretty sure it's obvious that bokuto and oikawa would be hyped on the idea of being teammates. like someone to practice with that won't get tired or tell them to take breaks?? hell yeah!

they definitely drag each other out and stay till off hours of the night practicing bc ofc they both want to make the starting lineup as quickly as possible. training should pay off sooner rather than later!

oikawa for one is glad that, while he loves iwa to death, he isn't there to nag him constantly about his knee and definitely doesn't mention it to bokuto like the dumbass that he is. bokuto, while he def misses akaashi, probably really loves oikawa's sets. they've probs really met their match in this set up in terms of stamina and determination

okay, hear me out : bokuto unintentionally hearing oikawa and iwa on the phone talking about his injury and probably feels bad about keeping him on it so late, even though oikawa never mentions it, and probs tries to get him to take breaks??

it probably starts out really subtle with bo trying to get him to leave an hour or two earlier but trying to distract him with other stuff but okis probably catches on really quickly and they both get pouty bc bo really cares and oikawa thinks he doesn't need babying bc aDulT tInGs.

oikawa strikes me as the type of person that thrives off of feeling wanted/needed tbh and probably does like taking care of people he loves despite how petty he can be and bo takes huge advantage of that.

bokuto getting oikawa to cool it with the intense training by making him feel like he needs to take care of bo sometimes, when it's basically the opposite, is really my cup of tea.

bruh idk i can just picture bo dragging him out of the gym bc he's hungry and wants to try that dish oikawa was talking about making one time. oikawa on the outside being like ofc you would my cooking is amazing but also being like uwu he wants me to cook for him??

and it's just their thing that oikawa may or may not catch on to ( bokuto probs tries to make him leave if he so much as flinches on a landing ) and may or may not play along with because he's soft for the way bo gets really happy at successfully steering him away from training

also, oikawa cooking dinner for the two of them at least once a week and it becomes their unofficial date night. guys im melting

[lovenliterature]

evermore thoughts

willow

I wasn’t sold on this on first listen but I really liked it on second listen with more attention to lyrics

video is also really lovely, big fan of that

really really like the difference in melody for the diff appearances of “life was a willow and it bent right to your wind”

favourite lyric: “I come back stronger than a 90s trend” - the look she does at the camera cemented this as my fave line even more

champagne problems

down as one of my faves from the start

love love love the narrative

proper late night with cider, melancholy vibe

kind of like a grown up/worse feeling august in terms of vibes?? as in like the experience described feels like a more intense heartbreaking august in a way

really like the conclusion too

favourite lyric: I really struggled to pick here but: “you booked the night train for a reason/so you could sit there in this hurt” for sheer visceral emotion, “dom perignon you brought it” for the way its sung, “How evergreen, our group of friends/Don't think we'll say that word again” and “she’ll patch up your tapestry that I shred” for lyricism

gold rush

again, one i wasn’t super sold on the first listen, music and the vibe didn’t really interest me

first notes made me think of epiphany

but then i listened to it watching the lyric video and holy shit

now v appreciative of the melody and bass and the pace of the lyrics

really really like her embracing talking about jealousy

love love love the ending and beginning being the same holy shit

favourite lyrics: “at dinner parties, I call you out on your contrarian shit” and the way she sings “with your hair falling into place like dominoes”

‘tis the damn season

again preferred on second listen, wasn’t on the list of early faves

the best xmas late night walks vibe, walking through frosty streets at home between houses, embracing the only time you get to think, losing yourself in music and nighttime with freezing hands and cloudy breath

would’ve fit my 2019 xmas vibe too

melancholy and nostalgia

favourite lyrics: “sleep in half the day/just for old time’s sake” and “and the heart I know I’m breakin’ is my own”

tolerate it

god girl you deserve better

kinda like a sad last great american dynasty in terms of searching for approval

naive innocence taken advantage of

drunk in my garden walking round to try and forget my life kinda vibe

favourite lyrics: “i know my love should be celebrated/but you tolerate it” and “now I’m begging for footnotes in the story of your life” 

no body no crime

holy shit did i sleep on this at first but oh my god its so good

start gives me show of hands vibes which is great

her husbands acting different and it smells like infidelity - just the way she sings this is so so fucking good

this is the easiest song to listen to and holy shit its just great

favourite lyric: “she said “that ain’t my merlot on his mouth/that ain’t my jewellery on our joint account”

happiness

“all the years I’ve given/is just shit we’re dividin’ up” - v v true, you have to rebuild your life after every relationship and taking it all apart is so much more sudden than building it up

like an alternative to the 1 which I LOVE

but also some parallels to this is me trying: “I hope she’ll be a beautiful fool..... sorry I didn’t mean that” vs “my words shoot to kill when I’m mad”

the whole bridge is iconic - “I can’t make it go away by making you a villain” - in the short term, anger at an ex can help, but eventually you have to move on, and its easier to accept that there was good in the relationship after a while, and it makes looking back on it better

“no one teaches you what to do/when a good man hurts you/and you know you hurt him too” - blame on both sides is much harder to take and grieve and its hard to know how to cope with that. it also makes advice more complicated because there isn’t much you can say to help

favourite lyric: “both of these things can be true” - always love duality and nuance in literature and its nice to hear it acknowledged in a climate of binary oppositions and no shades of grey

dorothea

nostalgia for the future

now prob my most listened, gets stuck in my head and one of the few i do listen to in isolation - like august

Reminds me so much of Ella - each other’s history, not each other’s whole future but in there somewhere

again sapphic vibes, real strong esp because of the ella vibes its the whole in between romantic and platonic affection

“hey dorothea, do you ever stop and think about me” - that’s the way I think of people I love esp ella and people from that era of my life, and anyone where its kinda open ended or just grown apart

favourite lyric: “and damn dorothea, they all wanna be ya”

coney island

instant fave - marked down from first listen and probably still one i actively look forward to 

much like with exile, the male vocals GOT me

“did I shatter you” that line broke my goddamn heart

favourite lyrics: both for the sheer feelings of the vocals and the lyricism “were you standing in the hallway/with a big cake, happy birthday/did I paint your skies the darkest grey” and “and when I got into the accident/the sight that flashed before me was your face”

ivy

the way she sings goddamn could be the whole fucking song its so beautiful

“my pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand/taking mine, but it’s promised to another” - the passive here is great

“he wants what’s only yours”

the trilogy of these lyrics “what would he do if he found us out?”, “he’s gonna burn this house to the ground”, “and drink my husband’s wine”, the recklessness, the drinking his wine like a secret defiance

“my house of stone/your ivy grows/and now i’m covered in you” - fucking hell this is the best imagery - even with the strongest walls and foundations, the love crept through and grew inside her til she was covered in it

favourite lyric: quite literally just the words “oh, goddamn”

cowboy like me

“dancin’ is a dangerous game” - hell yeah I get so many feelings from this, it just reminds me of the intimacy of dancing and the feeling of swaying in someone’s arms

“and the skeletons in both our closets/plotted hard to fuck this up” - both like active interference of exes or just simply trauma, unresolved issues

“forever is the sweetest con” - believing hurts and everything ends but its worth it for the time you have

favourite lyrics: “now you hang from my lips/like the gardens of Babylon”

long story short

first notes make me think of between the saltmarsh and the sea even though its SO different but also a bit like august idk why

“if the shoe fits walk in it/til your high heels break” - i just love the imagery of this line

“fell down the rabbit hole” - living for this line and the wonderland vibe

“but if someone comes at us, this time i’m ready” - the vibe of like not looking for a fight but defending what you love

favourite lyric: “past me/I wanna tell you not to get lost in these petty things” - YES BITCH also the energy I give to past me and future me gives to me now or “long story short I survived”

marjorie

another song I come back to on its own

this is the exact wistful vibe i look for in calm ish songs, can be sad, can be happy depending on a mood and this is perfect

the video is incredible and marjorie providing the backing vocals made me cry also it being in the same place on the record as epiphany was on folklore

“never be so polite/you forget your power/never wield such power/you forget to be polite” - love the use of wield, it also feels like the medium women try to find between being a “bad bitch” and being ladylike, but not a medium society will accept bc fuck that, the exact way THEY wanna do it instead

really the song i needed after the year of so much grief, and i know it’s gonna bring me comfort when grandma goes, especially the line “what died didn’t stay dead”

favourite lyric: “watched as you signed your name: marjorie” - the way this is sung will literally stay with me forever, its like a legacy in one line

closure

again, instant fave

the vibe of you don’t owe someone shit just bc they feel guilty is so good

“yes I got your letter/yes I’m doing better” “I know that it’s over” - I’ve moved on and I don’t need your permission for that or your well wishes thanks

Moving on doesn’t mean forgiveness

I just love the melody so much and its such a good song agh

favourite lyric: “I know I’m just a wrinkle in your new life/staying friends would iron it out so nice”

evermore

“grey november/I’ve been down since July” - most explicit pandemicy vibes i get, I was home and it was almost possible to just regard it as a normalish summer, looking after the dog and living at home and now its coming up to Christmas and I’m living away from home, our family is split across 5 homes in 4 cities and its fucking hard (not even sure if its that type of down but that’s how it made me feel)

“writing letters/addressed to the fire” - literally just picked up on this lyric and has kinda a dual meaning for me. 1 -feeling shit about things you create, putting in effort, just to throw it away. 2 - tactic for tackling anxiety, just getting rid of thoughts and releasing them from my brain

“Cannot think of all the cost/And the things that will be lost/Oh, can we just get a pause?” - again, v pandemicy and so relevant to the fam’s 2018-2019, we just needed a pause, we had to keep going and not process what we’d lost or we’d never carry on

such a good depression song

favourite lyric: “staring out an open window/catching my death”

[riskeith]

hi babe, hope you slept well.. ♥️

answering on the phone is just *takes screenshots* *opens tumblr app* *switch between screenshots and answering* do you also put on my messages on the laptop and answering with your phone usually, because that’s what i do lmao sjshdks. thank god for technology.

(I LOVE BEING CALLED BRO.. i believe that i would’ve been a dudebro in another life tbh..) there is? i’m not super immersed in the fandom actually so i had no idea, do you have any examples? ofc only if you wanna talk about it i know these topics can sometimes be annoying to think about. also you’re right! ‘don’t like don’t read’ is the law. follow it. i can’t believe how some people have the nerve to talk about what other people do creatively... yikes

you should if you ever find yourself not knowing what to read! i think their fics were some of my first in the fandom and they set the bar so high hehe. dude i love how oikawa just wants to see kageyama burn it’s so funny..... he’s so cocky about it while kageyama’s just his moody self. speaking of; one of my fave fics of yours is the swapping jerseys one!

WTF 😭 BABY POOLS AND POOL FLOATIES..... razor please come back to us please. sidenote but do you also think that his powers are 5 star level? hes soo powerful it’s so odd how he’s only 4 star haha... or maybe it’s just me being biased.

YEAH! THE SAVING SCENE IS SO AHHHHH. god especially if they have dialogue while person a is hurting and person b just spills all their feelings and becomes so erratic and scared and person a is like holy shit you love me.... and after everything is okay there’s still some awkwardness and tension and aaa.... 💢💔

OOO. sadly the ps5 is always out of stock it’s crazy how fast it sold out. but i mean it makes sense it’s arguably the most popular console so.. hopefully they restock soon. last of us is such a fun game! and the second part is ~gay~ which is always a plus. i’m not sure which memes you mean? tell me 👁 HAHA that makes sense actually omg... lumine and aether reunion won’t happen until like two years if the updates keep coming the way they are (STOP THAT WOULD ACTUALLY BE SO FUNNY.... like hello if you want to unlock the rest of the story you either gacha $pin for it or you imagine it yourself love ♥️😗) talking about this makes me wonder what the other worlds might look like....

your followers are just here to witness us planning our co-op date sjsjdkdjskz. speaking of,,, hehe. i have some fantastic news. i’m at ar level 11 right now and co-op unlocks at level 16... i might just reach that tomorrow (today for you) so i’m just saying hehehehehehehehehehehe.... 😏♥️

BOWL CUT. my cutie little baby. also mullet? sounds nice omg you will probably rock that look... 😳 i’m a non mullet supporter but if cluna has a mullet then call me a yeehaw mullet lover i suppose. can’t believe my wife is a cowboy. OMG YEAH IT MUST FEEL SO NICE your head went bzz bzz. how long did it take for them to accept it? and yeah god ikr some people take hair so seriously which is fair but also i’ve never understood it... like it grows out..? wow you really went from a ballet girl to punk rock style huh. i feel like you’re the both sides of the ‘she was a punk she did ballet’ meme.

memo fic is a jealous fic? mmm smells good. I FIGURED jshdjdkhsjs slow songs are just not your forte, huh? rip. langst is the best yet worst thing ever tbh. and YEAH I DO we’re truly 🤝 ok literally mood sometimes it’s just nice to talk about how much you love a character through another character in a fic yk? so what if this 2k fic contains 1k words about how beautiful oikawa looks? it’s what iwa feels <3 (YOU’RE LEARNING!!!!!!! THATS SO EXCITING!! i guess you just have to drive me around, huh?)

oh i’m in love i’m with that fic my girl. and i knew about that spoiler it’s kind of hard to miss it since it’s everywhere skdhdkdhdk... god, that sounds so good thank you for sharing it. pining iwaizumi hajime >>>>>>>> the air i need to exist 🥺 

THE DAY IS SO SOON CLUNA, it’s literally here soooo soon holy shit i just can’t wait. i played for almost 6 hours today in a row like an idiot and now i never wanna see hilichurls again in my life but hey, one step closer to my baby. prepare yourself.. 😏

AWWW i had a feeling you’d be a tea person. but omg tea effects your sleep? how late is too late for you to drink it? what’s your favorite flavors? 👁 and i’m addicted to both shdkdhsks. i say addicted bc i literally have 6 cups of tea per day easily and like.. 1 or 2 coffee cups per day. it’s really bad but i can’t stop so.. 🙇🏽‍♀️

COLLEGE BOYFIES CLUNA. COLLEGE BOYFIES WITH DIP DYE HAIR. imagine them doing each other’s make up and nails before going to concerts together. imagine xiao in euphoria kind of make up. holy shit. here’s something for your overwhelmed heart jsdhjshska. xiaoven soulmates girl, no doubt about it. THE EDIT THE EDIT THE EDIT!!!! they just look so beautiful. we need scenes with them like Asap. the edit is based on a fic... notes down.

can’t wait to see your screenshots. super excited!!

xo, m.a. (i almost wrote my name down in a haste shshskdjdk... although you’ll find it out soon...)

hiya!! i slept alright~ ahaha

:o that’s smart! but no i don’t LOL whether i’m on my phone or my laptop i just continuously scroll up and down fhdskjfkhsdf i think that’s why i come close to missing some paragraphs some times oops. yay for the ~wonders of technology~

(AIGHT NICE AHAHHA fhsdkjfsh does that mean you’re a bit of a tomboy?) actually coincidentally i came across this thread: https://twitter.com/maxatsuomi/status/1350145589296685057 which gives you an idea lmao (also some things on there i wasn’t even aware of wtf) EXACTLY??? it’s even worse when non content creators try to come for content creators like?????????/ um you’re getting all this food for FREE and yet?????? lmfao the nerve of some people

i def will!! FKJSHFDSKJ yeah that do be their dynamic lolol. and thank you!! i too think i snapped on that one 😩😩 glad others agree ahahah

i actually haven’t really seen him in combat... and when we could trial him i was too busy trying to pass the quests to focus on how he fought fhdkfhsdkfjshf but i do think his abilities are cool!! he have wolf above head 🥺

YEAHHH BOYEEEEEEEEEEE god that reminds me of a scene from a drarry fic (What We Pretend We Can't See wink wonk)

oh damn!! hope they restock soon for your sake~ yissss ive watched a playthrough and omg lev.... my Son. i don’t think i can find the memes again but it was just about the bugs like how if you throw a grenade on the highway everyone will run out of their cars like a flashmob or something hfskfhsdjfkds. (LMAOOOOO) there’s actually a trailer with the other worlds! https://youtu.be/TAlKhARUcoY (it has spoilers tho supposedly lol. none we understand rn at least)

hdsfkhjs. omg you absolute legend!!!! but i also hope that you’re taking care of yourself and prioritising the important things too fhsfhdksdhf. but i am excited hehehehehe

AHHAAHKFHDSKJFSD pls... once i saw someone with an actual proper mullet on the bus and i was like “ew... keith would look like this irl?” FJSDHKFSAHKDASHDFSDJFKJFDSHFKJS. but what can i say i got influenced by all the kpop bois 😔 and hmmm idk? i think my dad didn’t care too much but ik my mum did/does fhsfskfsdfhkf so who knows lollllllllllllllllllllllllllllll. IT REALLY DOES GROW OUT LMAO LIKE. fhkshkfsdkj my cousin called me a rockstar when she saw it LOL so you’re prob right 🤪

yeah slow songs really just. aren’t LMAO ‘behind this mask of mine’ was based on a slow bts song and i put it in the playlist i had for it (bc obviously) but i wanted to skip it every time hfksjdhfskjdfhskfdkfhkslfhadksfjsdjhfkashkfjsdh. EXACTLY!!!!!!!!!! you are so correct. (hehehe i was gonna say that too that you don’t need to drive bc it’ll take you around 😏 LMAO)

fhkdsj thank!! legit pining iwa.......... more like pining ME mayhaps i just be self projecting 🤪🤪

lolol dw i can fight the hilichurls for you 😩 also who’s your fave enemy to fight! i used to like fighting the treasure hoarders most but the hilichurls are cute.. FHSKJDHFSDFKJSD plus i need their fucking masks my god why are their drop rates so shit hfsdhjfks

i’m not too sure actually? i’ve never been up early enough to test it but i like drinking tea like after dinner... which is the problem AHAHA. hmm well i like matcha a lot LOL but also chai? and then like black tea.... all the other ones too... i used to drink some fruity ones which were nice but we have a lot of the like basic chinese ones at home too and i enjoy those as well lol. wbu?? omg.... m.a........... dfhksdfkjhfkjshfksjd that’s a lot!!!!!!! do you even need to drink water then HKDSJFHKSDFHDKDSHFJKSDH

omg............. ive never seen euphoria LOL but ............. omg ...................... i cannot process thoughts rn.....

xoxo!! c.r. (you mean bc we’ll be playing co-op? you don’t have to if you’re uncomfy fhdskjf my genshin name was literally ‘aether’ up until yesterday FHDFHSDKFSDFJSHFKSDF)

[babybirdgyeom]

got7 as friends with benefits

– basically friends with benefits becoming real lovers – this is longer than i intented it to be oops – just a lil something to overcome my writers block

𝑀𝒶����𝓀 𝒯𝓊𝒶𝓃 

– literally more friends than benefits – y’all always lowkey had a thing for each other – took you two years to finally make out though – but from then on y’all never stopped again – mark was like ‘oh only until we find smth serious’ – but you just both stopped looking for smth serious at all – oops – you saw absolutely no downside to this – good sex with someone you’re totally attracted to and can talk to about everyhing? amazing – so now it’s been like 12 months since this thing started – all different kinds of sex – sometimes it would be giggly as fuck, laughter and fun included – sometimes y’all would have sex while casually talking about everything – sometimes you just had sex to cheer the other one up on a bad day – basically always looking for any reason to have sex – you both are very confused how good this works out? – you’re pretty much like a couple but both of you are lowkey too dense to admit it – all of got7 knew about y’all, you didn’t even try to make a secret out of it – other fwbs only meet to fuck but not you and mark – he constantly comes over and stays forever, would never just leave after sex – right beside you when you wake up with no intention to leave until he absolutely has to – “mark??? do you think we act too much like a couple??” – he thought about your question for a second before lying down beside you – “naaaahhh” he said laughing before giving you a kiss “we fine” – you had no idea how y’all should continue because you definitely weren’t breaking this up – but you also knew this couldn’t go on like this forever even though you’d love that – so one morning you decided to adress this situation – he was so cute besides you with his morning hair you saw an angel – when you started to talk about “how to continue” he immediately started to panic – “do you want to end this?????” – you chuckled a bit – so he also didn’t want it to end – you assured him that ending this thing between you was the last thing you wanted – but also told him that you might start to look around again and meet other ppl – not bc u grew tired of him but bc u had to look out for the future – y’all were getting old and shit – mark didn’t like this thought at all – lowkey too shy to admit that though – “but we’re having fun, why should we stop” – softest baby you could swear he was pouting – for the first time ever he stopped and was like – hmmmm why aren’t we dating in the first place – never before thought about the idea of actually dating you – because what difference would it make y’all act like a couple – but suddenly he realized that it definitely would make a difference – 100% has no idea how to deal with this sudden change of things – after some time he tries to confess – highkey fails tho – “you know i love to have sex with you” – “i think we should have more than sex” – “what i’m trying to say is------------uuuuuuhm....” – stops and just starts kissing you – but more passionately and full of love – he smiled into the kiss which made ur heart beat 10x faster – you decided to help him out a bit – “i like you too mark”

𝐼𝓂 𝒥𝒶𝑒𝒷𝓊𝓂

– when the thing between the two of you started jaebum was sooo sure he’d be fine with it – you’ve been close to him since high school, always in the same group of people – somehow though you always were friends but nothing more – maybe bc y’all were too busy with other people mostly – but you definitely became good friends in the last few years – when he was suggesting this whole idea to you you were like – jb why u tryna ruin our friendship like that – but he assured you that sex couldn’t ruin your friendship – it would just be the cherry on top – now he’s not too sure about it anymore – he loves the sex for sure and wouldn’t want to miss it for anything – but this boy started to get a bit frustrated and insecure about the blurred lines between you and him – highkey has a crush on you and hates it – tries to hide it as good as possible – you were 100% sure jaebum was the best lover you could have – but also... damn he’s cute? and lovely? and so funny? – when he smiles your heart goes whoosh – but you always tried to ignore those thoughts – because how cliche would it be to fall in love with your fwb – you told yourself on a daily that it’s just his dick game that makes you think stuff like this – y’all said that you wouldn’t just sleep with other ppl unless you met someone you actually could see a future with it – “if we horny we can just call each other” – one time you were drunk on a night out with got7 – and jaebum may have slipped a lil drunk i love you – and you knew he was drunk and didn’t mean it – so you both laughed it off but since that moment everything changed – feelings were involved and you both knew you had to face them sooner or later – but tbh he tried to do it as late as possible – so ofc jaebum was going home with you in secret like always – and your usually rough sex was different all of a sudden – jaebum could be sensual???? that was new to you – he apologized for being so soft afterwards hshshs – both of you were laughing and talking the whole night – you were almost certain that jaebum also thought this could be more than being friends – until he ghosted you for a week after this night – and you wanted to kill him, fucking idiot – but ofc as soon as he wrote you again you were like – yea no prob dude :) – bc sadly you had no reason to be mad at him – bc he wasn’t your boyfriend – and slowly you started to hate that he wasn’t – definitely made up for ghosting you for a week – “let me take you out to dinner i’m sorry” – tells you he had a few rough days – in reality he didn’t write you bc he thought it’s the easiest way to get over it – jokes on him he’s a fool in love and he realized it by now – has the hardest time with it – bc im jaebum???? in love??? that wasn’t normal – but you made him soft – also best ‘i’m sorry i missed you too’ sex ever – gets frustrated afterwards – bc he loves not only your boobs but also ur lil soft heart – goes down on you while confessing hshssh

𝒫𝒶𝓇𝓀 𝒥𝒾𝓃𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓃𝑔

– no one knew that you two were kind of a thing – jinyoung never really labeled it as “friends with benefits” to you – one thing just lead to another one day and suddenly you all were making out in his bed – which was fine to you, no complaints – but in the beginning you were completely confused, not knowing where y’all stand – was this a one time thing? – were you becoming fuck buddies?   – he actually likes you a lot you were a hundred percent sure – but damn you knew him long enough to know how complicated jinyoung is when it comes to feelings – constantly has to talk to you about this whole situation – “(y/n) i’m bad for you we shouldn’t do this anymore” – “i don’t want you to miss the opportunity to meet someone you could like (y/n)” –  you just rolled your eyes whenever he started this nonsense –  not because you were annoyed –  you just wish he wouldn’t think that much and just let things happen – “we’re fine”, you always tell him – it was cute that he wanted the best for you but... you wanted park jinyoung – you knew this since a long time – you also knew one day he’d man up and ask you out properly – he just needs his time and you were willing to give it to him – and secretly jinyoung was very aware of this too – he wouldn’t just start screwing someone who’s as close to him as you – he cherished you and was more than thankful that you two didn’t need words to communicate – both of you hated to be so careful whenever you went out with the boys – “we should just tell them” your drunk self thought this was a good idea – as you were in a small room, pinned against a wall, jy’s lips all over your chest – “and then what?”, he asked placing another kiss on top of your breasts before continuing, “yugyeom and bambam would never shut up.” –  you knew he was right – but it would make things so much easier – “jinyoung” you said softly finally making him look up from your breasts – “you know you love me”, your drunk self said teasing him – he laughed before giving you a soft and sensual kiss – still chuckling he went down your neck again – “i’m sorry, i’m busy here”, he said avoiding the topic – but his laughter was enough for you – it just made you sure one more time that you were right about him – if he wouldn’t like you he would’ve said it – so you had to be patient with jinyoung – which was fine considering the fact that you’d still get to sleep with him all the time – he never left in the morning before you were awake – that would be disrepectful towards you in his opinion – it kind of was his way to show you he cares – because you knew he’d usually always sneak out immediately after one night stands – if he couldn’t sleep in with you he’d wake you up shortly to say goodbye – there was always a goodbye kiss involved even though he hated how cheesy that is – he couldn’t help it with you – he was constantly afraid that someone else might snatch you away from him – it didn’t matter that he knew you liked him too – it sometimes killed him that he couldn’t just man up and finally ask you out properly – he loved this friends with benefit thing you two had going on – sex whenever someone of you felt like it – but no room for fights or stuff like that bc you weren’t dating – months after this little thing between the two of you started he decided that it was finally time – you put up with his bullshit for long enough he thought – even though he still was afraid of commitment he wanted to try for you – also he knew that this one colleague of yours was trying to take you out – he couldn’t let that happen – another thing was that he was afraid you’d lose your patience – so finally after all he took the next step one night after sex – he was still inside you, his breath still heavy as both of you tried to calm down – his lips were finding your neck as his arm was around your waist – “i think i’m ready”, he whispered in your ear – “anal?”, you joked, making him laugh out loud – “i actually thought about making you my girlfriend.” he said, still chuckling a bit – “jinyoung”, you said surprised, not thinking it would happen anytime soon – he gave you a kiss, smiling into it – “i love you (y/n)”

𝒥𝒶𝒸𝓀𝓈𝑜𝓃 𝒲𝒶𝓃𝑔

– jackson wang was making you go completely crazy – you swear you were going insane soon – it started out simple – you and jackson met up every now and then to frickle frackle – you remember thinking you won the lottery – like look at jackson he’s a whole meal – eternal beauty mixed with a body that knew how to move – and wow, he knew what he’s doing – but that was the problem: jackson was literally perfect – you both said that you were friends with benefits and nothing more – well apparently to jackson wang that meant coming to you with your favorite chocolates – sometimes he’d pick you up and you’d drive around the whole night talking and listening to music – he’d never leave without saying goodbye – always texts you after sex even if it’s just smth small – “last night was amazing” – “hope you have a good day, don’t let your boss annoy you” – “write me if you need anything” – that perfect motherfucker straight up made you fall for him – sounds perfect doesn’t it? – but jackson just wouldn’t ask you out properly – it was all fun in the beginning – like damn y’all even had the same kinks – “this is all i need” jackson once said before falling asleep beside you – those mixed signals left you wanting more and more – within weeks you knew you were in love with jackson – what you didn’‘t know is that he felt the exact same way – at first he thought the amazing sex was just messing with his mind – but the way you looked at him and him only made him realize that this was maybe more than friends who had sex every now and then – he told mark about the whole thing and mark immediately was like – a giggly child which made jackson feel all giggly too – and as they were sitting on the sofa all happy you walked into the room – mark immediately stood up and out of nowhere hugged you – “you’re so cute (y/n)” – “wtf mark” – before you could ask anything he was already gone – “what was that about?” you asked jackson while sitting down next to him – suddenly he did something he never did before – his hand was in your hair and he gave you a soft and slow kiss – of course he did that before but not with the other guys in the same house – “jackson what if the others come in?”, you asked in shock wondering what was going on – he shrugged and looked you in the eyes, a satisfied smile on his lip – “they going to find out sooner or later” – “find out about what exactly”, you asked him confused – was he planning to tell the guys about your fuck dates – not that you’d care but it didn’t seem like smth he’d do – he usually never talked about his feelings – he was someone who showed how he felt instead of talking about it – “about my feelings for you” – you choked on literal air – suddenly you were talking feelings – so you weren’t delusional the whole time – he actually liked you – good for you tbh since dating jackson literally is like hitting the jackpot

𝒞𝒽𝑜𝒾 𝒴𝑜𝓊𝓃𝑔𝒿𝒶𝑒

– tbh being fwb with youngjae the most unexpected thing ever – you two been friends since ages – he knows your whole family and you know his – both of you were like it’s probs not a good idea – but you did it anyway – you never were interested in him back then – until one day you looked at him and realized   – wow youngjae rlly isn’t a boy anymore – he is a man now – suddenly you caught yourself staring at him at every party – blushing whenever he looked at you for a bit too long – he used to be so shy and cute – well at least that’s what u thought until he was kissing you roughly, pinning you against the wall outside of your friend’s home – but youngjae had many different sides to him – sides you never knew about before getting involved with him sexually – a cutie that always takes care of you and your needs – just wants you to enjoy and relax during sex – but 10/10 still knows how to get what he wants from you – sometimes he wonders how tf he managed to become your fwb – not bc he doubted himself just bc – he lowkey always had a thing for you – he also knew it probably was a stupid idea to go into a friendship with benefits with feelings from the start – didn’t care though at least he could finally have you – you both agreed that you were in it for the fun – no jealousy, no drama, just good sex in addition to your friendship – he was in heaven bc he loved how easy going it was – definitely wasn’t making a big secret out of his feelings tho – your lil deal never said smth about no feelings involved – the cheekiest of them all – sends you a good morning text every single day – always surprises you – you know no one would believe you but king of sexting – one time he wrote you that he needs one of those long hugs that turns into sex – and u were like HUH? choi youngjae? – basically this turned into your first of many sexting sessions – at the beginning you were 100% sure you wouldn’t develop feelings – uhh well by now you definitely had to admit you fooled yourself – one time while having very good sex you may or may not have called him babe – which maybe didn’t sound like a big thing but you usually never used nicknames – so midsex he just stopped being confused hshsh – he smirked a bit though, not able to hide   – “i like that”, he said giving you a small kiss – so suddenly you and youngjae were calling each other honey and babe – not much later you were resting your head on his shoulder in front of the boys – secret handholding at movie nights, sneakily under the blanket – until someday you just started casually talking about future plans together – the lines were getting more and more blurry – “are we friends?”, you asked him one night before falling asleep – your head resting on his naked chest, his hand playing with your hair – “yes, forever and ever” – his voice was soft like honey, he didn’t even had to think of an answer – “but are we just that? just friends?” – he let out a sigh, his thumb slowly stroking your cheek – “i don’t think you can be ‘just friends’ with someone you’re in love with”

𝐵𝒶𝓂𝒷𝒶𝓂

– you and bambam were messy as fuck it was almost amusing – everyone knew about the two of you – you even joked about it in front of others – “yoooo (y/n) rdy to suck this dicc tonite?” – starts laughing and apologizing right after – when it all started you remember telling bambam ‘just this once’ – until you found him in your bed again the next day – oh and the day after that – and by now you and bambam were constantly over each other – things were going really chill most of the time – y’all had fun, spent loads of time together – sometimes naked, sometimes dressed – y’all acted like it was no big deal and you were just friends – but every now and then you find yourself staring at him – wondering if he always was this beautiful – sometimes he laughed and you had to force yourself to think about something else – the members all kind of just saw you as a couple which was also pretty dangerous – one time you were texting with a guy from home – and jackson saw and was like – “bambam!!!!! who’s he why is (y/n) writing with him” – and bambam was like trying to ignore but you could swear he disliked it – but you never knew what he really thought – like whenever y’all were drunk he’d just be like the biggest flirt – you remember one time when you were at a party and making out outside – and he kissed down your neck and just telling you he loves you – ‘you’re drunk, we’re friends’ – at least that’s what you tried to tell yourself – ‘oh are we? i don’t kiss yugyeom like that you know’ – but then y’all never talked about it again – texts you at the most random times – sometimes all horny like – ‘i am in front of your house and coming upstairs get undressed’ – other times just in the middle of the night like – ‘did you know that cats sleep 16hrs a day?? i’m jealous’ – ohh talking about jealousy – bambam’s biggest flaw – he hated how jealous he was like he knew it was a problem – especially considering the fact that...y’all are not a couple – you talked to him several times about it – mostly bc u liked to tease him – and he was so shy and cute about it you never saw him like that – “listen i know!!! it’s stupid” – basically he’s just so jealous because you are not his – and if you meet someone else he’ll lose this fwb relationship – hates to admit it but he actually likes the thing you two have going on – “it’s chill” – you hit him “chill? what a nice way to describe having sex with me” – he laughed and tried to change the topic – but you wouldn’t let him – “bambam, do you like me?” – he just rolls his eyes – “ofc i do why would i sleep with you” – “but do you like like me?”, you asked teasing, looking at him with big eyes – “i changed my mind i fucking hate you” – breaking news: he didn’t hate you – he liked you so much it was k i l l i n g him – one time he dreamed of you – nonsexual – it was just you and him looking at the stars and you confessed – ever since then it was all he could think of when he saw you – but ofc he always played it cool in front of you – remember that one time he told you he loved you when he was drunk – truth is he barely drank that night – he knew exactly what he was saying but he knew how drunk you were – secretely hoped you don’t remember – until one time you and him were watching a movie where a dude confessed to a girl all drunk – and you were like remember WHEN YOU DID THIS – and he was like “uuuhm nnnnO?” – so you told him every detail of that night bc u truly thought he forgot – as you were halfway through he stopped you – “(y/n) i know exactly what happened” – leaving u confused af – “why did you lie???” – “bc u didn’t say it back” you could swear he was pouting – suddenly you froze... did he mean it? like actually mean it? – you never even considered that he was serious – long story short that’s how your fuck buddy became your boyfriend

𝒦𝒾𝓂 𝒴𝓊𝑔𝓎𝑒𝑜𝓂

– both of you have absolutely no idea how this could have happened – you never planned to even have sex in the first place – but the way he danced got you and the way you smiled got him – you decided to get rid off the sexual tension before it became unbearable – jokes on you bc it just made you want to have more – so you two found yourselves in the same situation over and over again – enjoying a night together and having endless fun – once the two of you started you wouldn’t stop – like there were times when you were just up all night having sex – with cute breaks in between where your head was resting on his bare chest – his hand tangled in your hair – it always feels so right even though it seemed so wrong – you and yugyeom definitely were trapped in this situation – of course the easy solution would’ve been to just date each other – but neither one of you dared to say it out loud – you hated when he left the next morning – yugyeom also hated that he had to leave – both of you were always afraid that this could be the last time before everything ends – dramatic headasses tbh – but once his lips touched yours you couldn’t get enough – no one knew about your secret little thing – which turned out to become pretty hard – you always had to sneak away in private – bambam and jackson were constantly on the mission to get you a boyfriend which didn’t make it easier – yugyeom wouldn’t admit it but he hated it when they tried to set you up – not even bc he wanted you just bc they were being so noisy about it – at least that’s what he told himself over and over again – long story short you two were obviously into each other – and the amazing chemistry you had in bed made it even harder to act like you didn’t – two weeks after your first kiss with yugyeom you already feared that it’s gonna be over soon – one time in the middle of the night u just had to wake him up to talk – “yugi i rlly don’t want this to ruin our friendship” – he immediately took your face in his hands, giving you a big smooch on your forehead – “i’d never let anything or anyone ruin us...especially not myself” – you often wondered how one night you could just have sex for 6 hrs – and the next night you wouldn’t even kiss, just both in bed, talking, laughing, making memories – he was always so sweet to you – making you feel more loved than any of the guys you actually dated – waking up next to him in the morning could end in two ways – dick sucking or cuddle sessions – you were both with fine – kingggg of eating you out tbh he could do it for days – and as much as you enjoyed the sex – and also the affection – and just being with him – you slowly gave up on the thought that he’d actually like you or ask you out – it was hurting you a bit if you were honest – so one day you decided for the sake of your friendship and your heart you needed to end this – “no why would we end this?” – the horror on his face was real – “(y/n), don’t you like me anymore?” – it broke your heart – “i think i like you a bit too much” – he took your hand, making your heart flutter – “then why would you end this rather than take the next step?”

[hwangskz]

willy witch-ka | witch! wendy

!!! this is a collab w @chocolate-chip-rookies !! u can see the post for her moodboard right here !! (also why r there so many Ws in the title....)

• ur head's kind of spinning as u open ur eyes, slowly blinking

• u lift urself up from the ground

• (COMPLETELY ignoring the fact that ur on the GROUND... great job, y/n.)

• and ur a bit ?? confused ??

• last time u checked u DIDN'T MOVE TO ANOTHER HOUSE

• so uh

• are u just..... in a stranger's room..??

• "oh, so you're up."

• u turn around and

• OH MY GOD WHAT A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN LOOK AT HER EYES-

• uh

• are human eyes supposed to.......shine...........

• and that too in red??

• ur first thought : ok what the fuck

• ur second thought : ?? WHAT THE FUCK ??

• ok but on a serious note ARE U DEAD

• this must be heaven

• i mean look at this beautiful woman....

• not be gay but DAMN U R FEELING THE GAY™

• damn ur friends were right when they said u'll go to heaven-

• "this is my place..not heaven. and i'm a witch, just so u know."

• ok maybe they were wrong u went to hell probs

• the Beautiful But Unknown Woman sits down on the foot of the bed, and turns around to face u

• "i was on a hunt for more materials to make up a potion, when i came across ur body-"

• ":0 am i..... dead...."

• "-well, no. u were unconscious. i suppose u were picking fruits? because i had also found a wild dragonfruit lying beside ur limp arm, and half of it was gone."

• "....it looked good so i decided to try it, to make a fruit salad for my friends and i to eat for dinner, if it was good enough."

• "it was poisonous, y/n."

• "i didn't know that- aND HOW DO U KNOW MY NAME???????"

• she sighs (damn was she stressed)

• "i'm a witch?????? i do MAGIC"

• ".......... right sorry"

• she sighs and u could swear she looked tired

• "are u like..okay tho? u seem tired..maybe u should be resting instead"

• she turns to face u, eyebrows raised as she points at herself after looking back and checking if u were talking to some random person out there

• "me?"

• "obviously"

• she laughs, waving her hand as she shakes her head

• "no no !!!! it's ok !!! we witches are like...immortal and all that so it's cool don't worry about me~"

• u nod ur head even tho u knew she was lying

• but it's ok it's better than arguing with this random stran-

• u don't.......u haven't even asked her name yet.......

• and this woman SAVED ur life

• (istg y/n)

• "so uh !! what's ur name"

• "wendy !!!"

• she grins widely as she answers, but quickly calmed down and smiled at u while continuing

• "what's urs!!"

• "i'm y/n- wait don't u alrdy know that"

• "..........."

• yall talked through the day, but soon it was night time

• and GOD this woman is so good at catching u off-guard

• u were staring out the window, thinking how the HELL are u supposed to get out and go back to ur lil cottage thingy where ur friends are, while wendy had gone inside to get some water

• when suddenly

• "what are u looking at-"

• "AAAAAAAAAA-"

• "Y/N IT'S ME !! FOR THE FIFTEENTH TIME IT'S ME PLS STOP YELLING SOMEONE WILL THINK SOMEONE GOT MURDERED OR SOMETHING"

• "right sorry"

• "what were u looking at tho"

• "how am i gonna return?"

• this ..... this completely slipped off her mind actually

• she's just so !!!!!!! comfortable being around u !!!!!!! and usually she makes a bad impression on ppl but u :( ur just so easygoing and she would love to spend more time w u

• but she knows that time doesn't wait and she will have to eventually let u go someday

• "is it okay if i drop u tomorrow early in the morning? it's too late rn to go out.."

• "sure!"

• but the next morning it just got even harder to let her go :(

• "fuck YOU feelings :(" - you, mumbling to urself

• but she made sure to give u a lil smthg before yall say goodbye

• "here u go."

• wendy handed u a chocolate bar, that had some other fruits inside it

• ....it smelled of dragonfruit ...?

• "it'll be a memory of us meeting!! i only infused it w the taste bcs i couldn't include the actual ingredient bcs it seemed to ruin the rest of the recipe somehow..but BECAUSE im a witch!!!!!!!! i used my powers and got u a chocolate bar that'll come back even after u've had it!!!!!"

• "that chocolate is like immortal...omg.."

• "like our friendship!!!!!!!!"

• and so, even after u moved back to the city, u were always reminded of wendy

• and sure u thought at one point

• that like

• it's probably the end of ur friendship

• not exactly "end"

• but mainly bcs u couldn't contact her

• and sure, it's rlly cool that the chocolate keeps coming back, but it's still a spell

• it won't last long

• and it scares u, bcs u would love to spend more time w wendy

• she's ur "willy witchka"

• gives u lifetime supply of chocolates, has superpowers, meets u

• but that one-time-meeting is the last meet

• and it saddens u bcs yea sure "willy witchka" is a cute nickname and wendy probably knows abt this nickname through her superpowers and is (probably) laughing at it rn

• u don't want it to be a one time thing

• "class, i would like you to meet our new student"

• u lift ur head, only to be shocked by the appearance of the person

• "hello! i'm son wendy, a new student. please take care of me!"

• she bows and

• wait

• did

• did she just ..... wink at u......

• :0000000000

• she takes the empty seat that's located beside u, while u continued to stare at her

• "please don't call me willy witchka anymore" - wendy, whispering while leaning towards u

• how to hold in ur laugh by y/n l/n

• "is it because it's an embarrassing nickname or because u don't want this to be a one-time-meeting thing?"

• "both"

[kae-karo]

Hi Katie! I just want you to know that I want your analysis of this new sims video more than anything and I'll just patiently wait for it... Have a nice day!

hi dear!! new sims vid, did u mean dnp simulator?

dorks spending the first ten seconds dancing in fake snow 

why virtual friends???? ??

my daddies gave to me y’all,,,,,,there’s knowing your branding and then there’s acting on that knowledge and i think this may have been one time where acting on your knowledge maybe was not a good call like ily and u do u and all but

i love phil loving his branding it’s cute also shoutout to @dnpscloset​ thanks for finding it (x) bc i want one now if anyone needs a last minute xmas idea i’m lookin at u mom u always wait til the last minute

same dan, same

‘we all have new faces and new lives and everything’s changed, this is gonna be hella dramatic’ *inhale* *exhale*

‘when u imagine the howlter family’ god they’re such adorable n sentimental nerds i love them

phil’s actual default is bein a leany boye

dnp arguing about what ‘desperate’ actually is as if the entirety of their first year after meeting they weren’t talking as often as they could five hour skype calls amirite

get away from me stalker lmao bold of u to say that danny

phil sweetie i love you with my entire heart he’s so so excited abt the virtual snow i love him

tiny zoom in jumpcut at 2:08 overlapping audio interesting

a mood and a half

phil immediately going ‘yeahhhhh thin walls family hearing things they gotta get out’ abt dab and evan like m8 we get it all u think abt is sex we get it god u and ur husband really are made for each other aren’t u (dnp = devan reference #1)

‘i presume evan is also jobless’ ‘i hope so!’ phil is it really,,,,,,smth to be excited about,,,,,,,

dan’s doin a lot of the hand phone lately u cute boy

we should have a redbull what is wrong with them phil can barely handle having too much sugar y’all thought it was a good idea to have a redbull also we should have a redbull they share literally everything which tbh is probs for the best lbr phil on a whole can of redbull hmmmmm yes ik it’s v possible and in fact probable that phil had his own can let me live

‘it’s a sensible lightweight jacket’ in the fucking snow wow dan u really did just set urself up for phil to drag u about not dressing for the weather

dan’s fucking laugh at 4:39 gives me life literally there is no purer and more adorable sound like that’s up there with kittens purring

‘i think he’s gonna be a bit of a diva in this relationship’ did you mean: dan howell (dnp = devan reference #2)

[slight bit of ankle is showing] dan: ‘and now you’re wearing shorts’

where’s the lie tho honestly that lil pause before he said mate

this clip will live in infamy bc i want this in every fucking phan edit for the rest of time like i can’t even think of the right out-of-context clip right now but anything that can be answered with phil saying ‘it’s dan’ i need it

mandatory phil covering his mouth and bein a cutie

yes destroy gender roles in the snow universe (although seriously dan’s ‘life is just about uncon-doing the horrible conditioning of all these gender stereotypes, phil’ is so important also i stan phil recognizing that before dan i think it’s really easy to forget that just bc up til recently he’s not been as expressive as dan of his opinions on how stupid gender roles are doesn’t mean he doesn’t have just as if not more progressive a mindset than dan)

‘it’s like a dan vs phil’ dnp = devan #3

dan has such a lovely singing voice i miss him singing

dude phil’s eyebrows are making a Solid appearance v expressive

i s2g this is a different moment from the one above he’s just so fricken cute???

‘but they’ve got each other’s backs, phil, just like dab and evan’ yeeeeaaaa i’m gonna go ahead and go with dnp = devan reference #4 here i think that’s fair

snow angels are the least fun thing to do and yet (x - it literally won’t let me put it in bc it’s a privated vid rip)

amazing they just started having a snowball fight how cute n domestic am i talking abt dnp or dab and evan hmmmm - dnp = devan #5

i get that infinity war was a meme but lads it’s time to let it go

‘and they’re called the howlters’ lmao as if u ain’t an honorary lester daniel (dnp = devan #6)

i’m living for phil’s excitement i mean if that’s what redbull does to him i’m here for it i guess?

hi they’re dumb this was cute

‘we don’t want to be those people, but for us personally, we very much found that you just need to just move into a big city of some kind and just jump into life with both feet’ this is not only adorable advice but also where dnp simulator comes into play aka we did this so uhh dab n evan should do it (dnp = devan #7) also dan speaking for them both singular pronouns are quaking

‘don’t trust that’ what on earth are u on abt phil what don’t u trust the fuckin desert or?????

scalyburg phil stop pls we know we get it dan’s a furry ur a scaly we got it

why does dan spend an entire 7 seconds (8:40) adjusting is he moving closer to phil? switching which leg he’s sat on? idk but it lead to me pausing at this moment which was a gift in and of itself

‘the deposit on that one, plus the weekly went would make us instantly broke, so that’s fun, us when we moved to london’ bih do u hear me crying

does dan remember phil’s first manchester apartment what kind of question is that phil have u met dan he probably remembers every bloody inch of that place i mean he did remember that there wasn’t a bedside table so

stop that

middle of the city, romance festival, geekcon, pretty views and cherry blossom trees sounds like dnp’s ideal location do u get why i’m calling it dnp simulator yet also dnp = devan #8

we don’t want to move next to the karaoke legends wow dan bold of u to say after belting helena at 2am real bold

phil having flashbacks to the apt they toured where they found out people died there

hi phil just looks so excited by everything

look i’m not saying anything except they’re managing to find a lot of similarities b.w their lives and what they’re doing for dab and evan okay like this apartment is great for people-watching? which is what phil did in his manchester apt?

context whomst? idk her

shoutout to the wardrobe

big bold life-changing steps

anon spitting truth up in this house (but like,,,,,my thoughts exactly lmao i was like they’re such introverts they would’ve avoided meeting their neighbors at any cost including apparently smacking into a locked door trying to avoid small talk phil we love u bab)

casually mentioning dan saying ‘we are dil-’ was he gonna say dil’s son, maybe but i like to remember the bloops of dan repeatedly calling dab dil so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

omg okay so from like. this point on, when dan’s like ‘here is my vision’, i’m absolutely getting queer eye vibes like amateur queer eye tho like two gay nerds trying to embody queer eye in their lives a bit oh wait

okay okay okay dan u said an ensuite bathroom and then failed to add a door to the bedroom do u understand how frustrating that is???????? do u understand how stressful it was for me to watch that whole damn vid and know that u forgot the door????

a space for hobbies what hobbies who has hobbies

they learned nothing from building their house before: phil should take the mouse away from dan immediately look at him he is such a sugar baby in this jfc

god dan is so cute get these idiots a penthouse apartment super high up so he can have his bath next to a window okay he deserves that in life

stop it they’re literally agreeing on almost every single thing god they literally share a single brain

amazing

leany boye

‘they are young adults moving into their first apartment, you don’t have art!’ okay first of all don’t even go there daniel second of all i’m sorry you’re the one arguing for spending literally all their money but u don’t want to get some art bc it’s unrealistic????

dan saying lovely

phil’s mr carpet

navy??? navy? when did they? why? 

i would get involved in a criminal plot to have that / i’m gonna throw you out of one

wow pro tips makin a comeback

phil is Losing Steam

oh my god okay so i was joking but literally phil is losing steam lmao 18:35 he says ‘ayy’ and it’s so tired-sounding

leany leany boyes

okay look ik dan’s going into ‘aww poor philly’ mode but also he knew that very quickly like honestly that’s not a Thing i would ever notice about someone tbh i’m not saying it’s like Significant but damn danny was really into phil to know that shiz man

the high-fashion gigantic rug of our dreams

okay look i can’t make this up phil literally leans away for a bit and then

hello daniel’s Curl

i stan phil getting excited over plants

dab and evan will be having a mario kart fest will they (dnp = devan #9)

mirroringggggggg

dude big mood god they’re so fond and full of memories 

honestly dnp made it that way like u cannot convince me they didn’t purposely decide to do that mmkay

‘see they are ready to have their romantic dinners. and then they can pretend they have another friend and it’s fine!’ am i talking abt dnp or dab and evan who knows :) (dnp = devan #10) 

cold in the middle what on earth i literally have no memory of that i mean it could just be my shit memory but jfc they just remember that stuff goddamn

scrunchy boyes also phil where’s ur arm at hm

like i’m not fuckin joking where is it

you can’t exist without a computer i mean

what is important in life / the internet

they don’t even have fucking doors and dan’s like ‘uhm they need a terrarium’ dan i’m stressed

oh my god i’m sorry phil is so done with this now it’s actually comical

hi they didn’t add a door for the ensuite

give dnp an interior design series honestly give them any series

phil reached for dan’s hand u cannot convince me otherwise

‘not my personal taste’ really,,,,,really

when dab n evan hug dan looks at the screen n phil looks at the camera things u didn’t need to know but now u do

lmao jumpscared by the kiss

‘i feel like i’ve never nailed anything more in my entire life’ hmmmm hmmmmmmmmmm hm

the fuck was dan’s ‘getting a job’ that’s his fnaf voice u stop that

doon doon doon doon

tongue

hi uhm what the Fuck was that jumpcut at 28:30 i hate Obvious Jumpcuts with a burning passion specifically bc of dnp

[creepyproxies]

RFA+V+Saeran Character Headcanons

Yoosung

Complains about schoolwork a lot, but he eventually does it because he’s paying out of pocket and doesn’t want his nonexistent money to go to waste

Always says he’s never had a girlfriend, but I think he’s had a one night stand with he met at a LOLOL convention.

Eventually grows out of playing LOLOL when he marries MC, and starts prioritizing his time wisely

Also grows out of wearing hair pins, lol

Gets attached to every animal that visits his clinic, and every animal he sees tbh

Really likes to surprise MC with little things like doing the laundry, making dinner, picking her up from work, or a date.

Every time he passes by a pet shop he stares inside and falls in love with the puppies or kittens and begs MC to adopt a pet. Every. Time.

Loves to cook with MC, because cooking is one of his hobbies and he gets to share his love for cooking with his love- MC

Says he wants kids to prove he’s not a baby, but if him and MC were to have a child, he’d get pout-y cuz he’s not the baby anymore (but gets over it bc “omg I’m a father)

Zen

Occasionally takes time off of work to relax and spend time with MC

He makes the effort to get to rehearsals early so he can get off early and not stay so late

If he ever has to travel for work, he would take MC with him because not only is she his manager, he doesn’t want anything happening to her while he’s gone

Loves surprising MC with flowers, and different kinds too

If he and MC get married it would be a private wedding with only close friends and family (and yes he invited his family, because he wants to reunite with them since he’ll be starting his own family soon)

Would want a pet, maybe a dog to accompany him while he goes on his daily jogs. Or if MC doesn’t want a dog he’ll settle for a fish.

Falls asleep while reading his script all the time

Really likes it when MC plays with his hair

Would want to take a road-trip with MC, blasting music, singing songs together, not really knowing where they’re going but just enjoying the ride.

Move’s from his apartment before he asks MC to move in with him, somewhere better for the both of them, and maybe a little one...

Him and MC do facial masks together, every night before bed.

Jumin

Doesn’t drown himself in work like everyone thinks, especially since him and MC are married now.

Like Zen, Jumin occasionally takes time off of work to relax and spend it with MC.

Likes to surprise MC with mini vacations. He’ll pack her luggage with everything he know’s she’ll need/want to take, and then when she wakes up the next morning he says “Get ready, I have a surprise for you.”

Lives to see MC’s smile, he loves making her laugh, even though sometimes he can be a bit awkward with jokes, he still tries.

Also, Like Zen, takes the time to get to work early so he can get back home early.

When he leaves for work he lets MC choose if she wants to come or stay. Though he’d rather her stay because she’ll be stuck in a hotel room all day while he’s in meetings and he doesn’t think it’ll be fun for her.

He loves seeing MC playing with Elizabeth, it fills his heart with joy.

Actually wouldn’t mind if MC got a job, he wouldn’t want her stuck in the house all day with nothing to do, but also doesn’t mind if she stops working.

He does make MC have at least one bodyguard with her every time she goes out. This is something non-negotiable for him, he wants to make sure MC is safe at all times.

When he’s feeling lazy, he’ll stay in sweatpants (yes he owns sweatpants, prob Gucci ones tho) all day and just sit on the couch.

He’s a heavy sleeper, like you can pour water on this guy and he’ll sleep through it.

Wakes up early out of habit

Would want kids but after a few years of being married to MC

Jaehee

Actually makes the effort to become friends with Jumin, just she stopped working with him doesn’t mean she hates him :)

If any of the members ever need advice, with relationships or just life they’d usually go to her, because they trust her and she gives logical and reasonable advice

Would offer the RFA a job at her cafe if they ever needed it.

Doesn’t hate animals, just prefers not to have one.

Isn’t addicted to coffee, just really likes it.

Before any new drink goes into her cafe, she’ll ask the RFA to taste test it.

Saturday is movie night with her and MC, so they choose a movie and relax. Usually it’ll be one of Zen’s Musicals but sometimes it’ll just be any random movie.

If MC wants to, Jaehee will gladly teach her some judo moves

If her and MC are in a relationship, she wouldn’t want to show too much PDA.

Always makes sure her and MC are eating healthy, because she doesn’t want to fall into the bad habit of eating takeout food all the time, again.

She’s a deep sleeper and will fight you if you try to wake her up without a valid reason.

Would want to adopt kids! After her and MC are financially stable of course :)

Saeyoung

Doesn’t drown himself in work, and his work doesn’t control his life

Knows how to get his work done quickly, he’s just lazy and gets distracted easily which is why it takes him such a long time.

Does try to eat healthier once MC moves in with him. But won’t stop eating Honey Buddha Chips or drinking Dr.Pepper.

Teaches MC how to defend herself, because he thinks she should be able to do so if anything ever happens to him

They train for at least two hours every day

If MC wants to learn how to hack, Saeyoung will gladly teach her what he knows.

Likes to go on family outings, with him, MC and Saeran. They’ll go to the park, get some ice-cream, just spend quality time together.

He really wants MC and Saeran to get along. Both of them mean so much to him

Never pushes MC away again, or at least tries not to. When Saeyoung gets into his “I’m too dangerous” feels he remembers that you still haven’t left him and have supported him throughout the way

Tickle fights with Saeyoung are not uncommon, expect one every other day.

Really does want to get married at a space station.

Would want kids but after a few years of marriage.

Saeran

He only starts dating MC once he’s almost fully recovered, before that him and MC are only friends

Everyone says he’ll be uncomfortable with affection but I think the complete opposite.

Once Saeran realizes he has feelings for MC he’ll want to be very loving

He’ll want to show the love he never got

Doesn’t go overboard with the PDA though

Occasional hand holding or hand around your waist/shoulder when you guys are in public.

Maybe a smooch but Saeran doesn’t ever over do-it

When he’s angry or is having an episode, he usually shuts everyone out and wants to be alone

But since he is trying to be better, he does vent to MC about his problems and does let her help.

Saeran wouldn’t want kids because he worries about being like his mother

If MC were to end up pregnant though, he would make the most out of it ad try his best to be the father he never had.

Jihyun/V

Only starts dating MC when he feels like he’s recovered

The sweetest boyfriend ever

Will always try to be there for you

Loves taking candid pictures of MC 

or like having little random photo-shoots in the house

will try his best to stop blaming himself for things, but does it out of habit 

likes to go on outdoor dates, e.g: picnic dates, stroll-in-the-park dates, you name it.

does have a thing for succulent plants, he loves them and has a bunch around the house

like saeran, won’t over do-it  with the PDA. Just an arm around the waist/shoulder

Always suggests that the RFA should hang out one day out of the week, every week. The RFA is like family to him

Speaking of family, Jihyun wouldn’t mind kids. He would be fine with or without them.

Also, Jihyun would only consider marrying MC when his whole being is convinced that what happened with Rika, won’t happen again.

[workingforthewidow]

Turn Washingtons Spies Fic

Strap in kiddos bc this fucker is well over 30 pages in Word and 11,000 words. Should I have split it into parts probs but I worked on this bitch for months so here you go. It’s Ben/OC with some BFF Caleb, Simcoe/OC, Andre/OC. And the others are here too. 

Warnings: mentions of death/war/weapons/ lots of Simcoe hate. I the fluff queen wrote it so there shouldn't be anything to major. I did make Sky cry tho but she's emotional AF so oh well, it was happy cries I think.

This isn't a reader insert, I wrote it for my sister and I, so I used our names. 

   “Do you have to go with them? Can't you stay here? Please.” Ben’s grip on my hand tighten as if he believed if he continued to hold it and not let go, I couldn’t leave. 

   “I have to go back. I can’t let Sky and Papa go alone. They’ll forget to eat and sleep if I’m not there to remind them.” 

   “I’m sure they will be fine.” He was getting desperate.

   “I’ll come back you know that. These months will pass quickly then you can come to Scotland and bring me home. Write to me and I’ll write to you. I need to go. Papa will question me if I’m gone to long. I love you Ben.” 

   “I love you too.” He kissed me once then released his hold on my hand and I quickly made my way back to where Sky and Papa were waiting. 

   “Don’t worry you’ll see him again soon.” Sky whispered to me as we boarded the ship that would take up back to what was once our home, Scotland. 

   Once the war was over, ending in England’s defeat our father, Major Hewlett or Papa as we called him, decided it was best we go back to Scotland and try to restart the lives we left behind. But so much had changed since we had last been in Scotland. We had all fallen in love. The two of them were sadly left heartbroken. Well sadly for Papa. Sky could get over her heartbreak - that guy was a jerk. 

   After what felt like a lifetime, we finally landed in Scotland. A place I once dreamed about returning to but now I wanted nothing more then to leave.

   “Isn’t it wonderful to be home girls? I made arrangements for the house to be cleaned and ready for our return.” Papa said smiling. Both Sky and I put on a false smile for him. While my heart was left in America, she believed hers was in Canada but that was a lie and she needed to understand that he was a jerk and she could do better than him. 

   We arrived back to the home of our childhood. Everything was the same as it was when we left it years ago. Yet it was so different now. We each put our things in our rooms and settled into the sitting room. After a few minutes of sitting silence Papa decided to go out and check the land while Sky and I walked around the home we hadn't seen in a long time. Just as we started to prepare dinner a knock was heard from the front door.

   “How are people already showing up? We have been here all of five hours.” I groaned and opened the door to find a postal messenger. 

   “Letter for Miss Taylor Hewlett.” The man handed the envelope to me and tipped his head quickly before leaving. 

   “Well who was it?” Sky called from the kitchen. I walked in with a smile on my face. “They must not have stayed if you’re happy.” She laughed.

   “I got a letter from Ben.” 

   “What? How? Ships are not that fast.” 

   “He sent it before we left. Isn’t that sweet?” I smiled and read over the letter quickly before hiding it where I knew my father wouldn't find it. “I miss him.”

   “Just a few months and you will be with him again.”

   “Papa will never let me go. I imagine he’d rather have you married off to Simcoe. At least he was on the English side.” There was a time when I wouldn’t have worried this much. When Papa was happy with Anna Strong but then the engagement fell through and Papa went away for a while. 

   “Don’t cry Tay. You know Papa just wants what he thinks is best for us. He cares about us.” 

   “And what he thinks is best is not me being with Ben.” 

   “You don’t know that. Wait and see. Ben won’t be here for a few more months.” Sky tried to calm me. 

   “9 months 23 days. Give or take a day or two.” 

   “A day or two until what my dear?” Papa walked in returning from the land.

   “Tay was just saying it would take a day or so for us to readjust to life here. It has been quite a while since we were here.” Sky quickly covered for me.

   “Ah yes. Don’t worry. It won’t take long then things will be just like they were before that horrid war.” 

   -8 months later-

   Life was anything but back to normal. Just two months after being back Papa met a woman named Elizabeth and married her just four months later. She was a nice woman, who Papa wanted us to call Mother, but she wasn’t Anna. Anna Strong was the woman I wanted to call my mother. All I wanted was to be back in America. That’s where not only Ben was but also Caleb and Anna. 

   “Taylor, are you okay?” Elizabeth asked over dinner, “You look a bit distant.” 

   It was just her, Sky, and I tonight. Papa had been called away to help research a newly discovered planet and would not be home for a week.

   “She’s probably thinking about her Benji.” Sky said without a thought. I kicked her under the table and sent her a glare. 

   Elizabeth’s eyes lit up and she smiled at me, “Oh, who is Benji?”

   I sighed but answered anyway, “His name is Benjamin or Ben. Only Sky calls him Benji. He’s… he’s my…”

“He’s Tay’s fiancé. He’s from America.” Sky answered for me. “He will be here in a month or so to take her back to America.” 

“Your father hasn’t told me this.” Elizabeth said.

“He doesn’t know. I haven’t told him. I don’t know if he would approve. Ben was on the American side during the war. But Papa loves dramatic showings of romance so hopefully by Ben coming here and confessing his undying love for me again Papa will be swayed to let me go back with him.” 

“And I’ll go to find John.” Sky added in once I was done.

“You mean Ben and I will hunt down Simcoe.” I corrected her. 

Elizabeth looked at us extremely confused so before Sky could corrupt her thought I told her the truth about him.

“John Simcoe is who Skylar wants to marry. He is horrible man who has done horrible things and yet she still wants to be with him. He tried to kill Papa many times. Tortured my best friend Caleb to the brink of death. And has killed many of our friends and their family members.” 

“John Graves Simcoe. And he is not all that bad.” Sky tried to defend him but it was no use.

“Oh right how could I forget that name. I imagine he chose that name himself because of all the people he has put in the grave. Do you deny that he did any of the things I just mentioned?”

“We’ve all made mistakes, he’s changed and he’s trying his best. He gave Akinbode his freedom papers and he’s working on abolishing slavery. Isn’t that good enough?” 

“He. Tried. To. Kill. Papa.” 

“That was before he knew me. He wouldn’t dream of doing that now.” 

“Doesn’t matter. He has done nothing for me or anyone in our family expect for you. So Elizabeth that is who Simcoe is and you can probably understand why I want him gone.” I turned from Sky to look at Elizabeth who was wide eyed by this point. 

“He seems to be an interesting man. I cannot judge him without meeting him.” She was always trying to stay on both our good sides hoping one day we would call her ‘mom’.

“Hopefully you won’t. Papa hates him as much I do and will never let him in this house.” I said just as a knock was heard from the door. I left the dining table and opened the door, it was the messenger.

He looked out of breath like he had been running, “I apologize for calling at such a late hour but this letter is urgent.” He handed me an envelope before making his way back to his horse. 

“Who was it, Tay?” Sky asked when I returned. 

“Messenger. Urgent letter for me. Probably Ben, he’s so excited to see me.” I tore open the letter and started reading. I knew immediately it was not from Ben, it wasn’t his handwriting. I read the whole message three times over not believing the words. 

“Tay? What does it say?” Sky leaned over to try and read over my shoulder. 

“He’s not coming.” I dropped the letter on the table as tears started to form.

“What do you mean?” Elizabeth asked as Sky took the letter and started to read aloud.

“Taylor, I felt it was best you knew this so you did not stay in waiting for Ben. He is not leaving America. He has taken a job with the government and he has no time to step away at the moment. Knowing Ben he has probably made promises he will come for you just a little late but I doubt that happens. I am sorry and if you ever need anything you can call upon me. Abe” Sky’s voice was burning with hate by the end, “Dammit Abraham. Tay, you know Abe is an idiot. He probably misunderstood. Ben loves you. He is going to be here.”

“But what if he’s not, Sky? I would have wasted all my time.” 

“Don’t say that. It will be okay.” 

Neither of us noticed Elizabeth had left until she returned with a plate that held fresh made cookies. 

“I made these earlier while you two were out in the field with the horses.” 

“And donkey don’t forget Charles.” I reminded her and took a cookie. “Thank you.”

“You’re right. How could I forget Charles. And you’re welcome. I know how bad heartbreak can hurt.” Elizabeth smiled and sat back down. 

The rest of the week was spent trying to forget Ben and focus on Papa’s return. Once he was home he told us all of his time in the city and all the things he saw. It had been nearly two months since I received the letter from Abe and I had almost gotten over Ben until he showed up on our doorstep. 

“I’m here to see Miss Taylor Hewlett.” Even from upstairs I knew his voice. 

“And who may I ask are you?” Elizabeth’s voice also carried up the stairs. 

“I’m…”

“Ben.” I ran down the stairs and went to the door jumping into his arms. “I thought you weren’t coming. You had to stay in America.”

He let me down with a shocked and confused look, “Why would you think that?” 

I went back upstairs to my room and returned with the letter from Abe. “Abe sent this.” 

Ben took the letter from my hands and read over it. He shook his head multiple times and even rolled his eyes a few times.

“My dear, why would you ever listen Abe? You know he is only capable of limited things. It is true I am late because of my new position with the government but I promised I would return for you.” 

“You know I’m my father’s daughter. We Hewletts tend to over react at times. Like Papa will once he sees you.”

“Don’t worry. We can convince him.” Elizabeth spoke up.

“I hope so. Oh Ben this is my mother Elizabeth. Liz this is Ben, obviously.” I introduced the two.

“I’ve heard a lot about you Ben. It’s a pleasure to meet you in person.” 

“It’s nice to meet you as well Mrs. Hewlett.” Ben smiled and bowed slightly. 

The sound of running was heard through the house and Skylar ran into the room. 

“Who’s here? I saw someone ride up. BENJI! Oh wait I’m mad at you.” Her smile fell.

“Not anymore. We love him again. Abe was being Abe and messed things up.” I laughed and moved away from Ben so Sky could hug him. “Now we just have to tell Papa.” 

And as usually my father had the world’s best timing and returned home at that exact moment. 

“Mister Tallmadge what on earth are you doing here? I did not expect to ever see you again.” 

Ben and I looked at each other before Ben spoke up. “Major I am here to discuss with you a matter which is very important to me. Is there a place we may speak in private?” 

Papa gave him a questioning look but nodded and had Ben follow him to his study. 

“What’s going to happen? What if this doesn’t work?” I had no idea what Ben was planning and if he messed this up then Papa would never let us marry.

“Ben is a smart man, Tay. He will win over Papa and you two will be married in no time. Lets out and see the animals. You’ve haven’t seen your donkey in days.” Sky took my hand and led me outside.

“His name is Charles. Why can’t anyone remember his name? He’s not just a donkey he’s Charles.” I huffed annoyed but followed her anyway with Elizabeth following as well. 

We stayed in the field for what felt like hours before Papa came out to find us. 

“He is a nice fellow. Not what I expected from someone with such a close friendship with Abraham.” I looked at him expecting more. 

“So should we be celebrating?” Elizabeth asked hinting towards an engagement. 

“Has she accepted?” Papa answered and looked over to me. I smiled and hugged him before running into the house to find Ben. “If he did not show up at this time when did she plan on telling me?” He turned to Sky.

“I think him showing up was her plan. You know her, she’s blinded by love like the rest of us.” 

-6 months later- 

Ben and I returned to America shortly after our official engagement. It was wonderful to be back. I felt like I was back in my true home. 

“Damn Benny boy I can’t believe you really convinced her to come back to you.” I heard the voice of my best friend Caleb Brewster. 

“I really only returned so I could see you again Caleb, you know that. I missed my best friend.” I smiled and hugged him.

“Don’t let your sister hear you say that.” 

“She isn’t here. She’ll arrive in a few months. That is if we can keep her away from Canada and Simcoe.” I groaned.

Caleb rolled his eyes and laughed, “She’s still hung up on that arse?” 

“Very much so. I still think we should kill him.” 

“I agree and we both know Ben does as well.” 

We spent the rest of the afternoon talking and catching each other up on our lives. It was during this conversation I brought up Anna Strong. 

“How is Anna? Ben told me Selah had returned.”

“Aye he did. They took the tavern back. Things are somewhat back to normal. She misses you and Skylar. Asked Ben about you anytime he got a letter.” 

“Is she in the tavern now? I want to see her.” I wanted to tell her about my time away and find out how her life was going now. Caleb nodded and we walked to the Strong Tavern. 

It was past working hours but we knew Anna wouldn’t mind. We walked in and saw Selah and Anna talking. 

“Sorry we’re closed for the day.” Anna said without looking away from her husband. 

“Even for your best friend?” 

Anna turned and smiled when she saw me. “Tay! I didn’t know you and Ben had gotten back. It’s been so long.” She hugged me tightly before turning to Selah. “Selah, this is Tay, Ben’s fiancé. Tay, this is my husband Selah.” 

“I’ve heard quite a lot about you, Miss.” True to the stories from Ben, Selah Strong was not a man of many words.

“No need for formalities. Just call me Tay. Anna I have so much to tell you. So much has happened and I need your help with something.” 

“And what might that be?” She asked.

“Sky is still head over heels for that vile Simcoe. Her plan is come here for the wedding then travel Canada to find him. Papa and Elizabeth, she’s Papa’s wife, will be here but they’ve already tried to stop her and it’s not working. So I figure maybe if you try to talk some sense into her when she gets here.” 

“Talk some sense into her? I’ll beat some sense into her. How can she still have feelings for that man after all he did?”

“She claims he has changed. I highly doubt that is true.” I shook my head. “I say we go to Canada, find him, and I don’t know maybe kill him.” 

“I second that.” Caleb agreed.

“While I too agree, we don’t have time. Our wedding is only two weeks away. Skylar will be here any day now.” Ben added, I was sure this was Ben’s way of trying to keep me out of danger and away from Simcoe. 

He was right though. There was no time to even come up with a plan on how to kill Simcoe, let alone get to Canada and find him. 

We stayed at Strong’s Tavern until late into the night. When it got to the point where I was falling asleep on Ben’s shoulder we decided it was time to return home. Ben practically carried me upstairs to our room and helped me out of my dress. 

“Where are you going?”  I hold onto his hand when he goes to leave.

“I just have to finish somethings in my study. I’ll be back shortly. I love you. Sleep well.” He smiled and closed the door as he left. I fell asleep almost as soon as he walked out.

When I woke up the next morning Ben was no where to be seen. His side of the bed didn’t even look like it was slept in. I got myself dressed and walked downstairs. I found Ben in his study asleep on his desk. I stood behind him and gently shook his shoulder.

“Ben, darling, wake up. It’s morning time to get up.” He slowly sat up and rubbed his eyes. “And this is why I say you shouldn’t work late into the night, you always fall asleep here. Come on, I’ll make breakfast.” 

We walked to the kitchen and Ben sat down almost falling asleep again.

“What time did you fall asleep?” I asked him as I started to make pancakes. 

“I don’t know. Around 4 maybe.”

“Ben thats not good for you.” 

“The thing he does that’s good for him is having you around. Oh breakfast I’m just in time.” As usual Caleb walked into our home like he owned the place and sat down next to Ben.

I laughed and sat a plate down in front of each of them. “You know Caleb one of these days you’re going to waltz in here and see something you probably shouldn’t.” 

“Nah I’ve seen Benny boy without his pants and I doubt you’re bad looking.” He smirked. 

I smacked on the side of the head, “You shouldn’t speak to a lady that way.” 

“I didn’t know Sky was here already.” Caleb laughed. If Sky heard him she would have hit him too. She may be able to dress up and act fancy when it was absolutely necessary but she much rather preferred to be doing something like shooting a pistol compared to going to a party. 

“She will be here any day now. As long as she didn’t run off to find Simcoe first. Canada is a big place she’ll never make it.” I noticed Ben and Caleb sharing a look before going back to eating. “What? What do you know? I know that look and I know you know something. So tell me, come on tell me.” 

They looked at each other again and Caleb shoved a piece of pancake in his mouth before gesturing that he couldn’t speak while eating.

Ben sighed and ran his hand down his face, “We may know where Simcoe is currently. Word is he is returning here to get the last of his belongings.” 

“I thought everything he left here was burned?”

“He had some connections left who seemed to like him enough to hold onto a few things.”

“So that means it will be easier to kill him? Ambush him on his way here. We’ll make it look like a robbery.” 

“Sweetheart put the knife down. You’re scaring me.” Ben stood up and took the knife from my hands. I hadn’t even noticed that I was holding it. “We are looking at our options. We can’t just kill him out right. We need probable cause.” 

“Probable cause!” Caleb finally stopped shoving food in his mouth and spoke again. “Probable cause! Benny look at everything he did to us. To our families. Remember what he did to…” 

“I remember what he did. I will not never forget but it’s been so long that if for some reason we are taken to court they will find a way to hang us. I promise he is going to pay for everything he did but we have to do it responsibly.” Ben interrupted him. None of us wanted Caleb to finish his last sentence. 

Before anyone could say anything the front door opened. 

“Tay! Benji! I have arrived!” Sky yelled.

“In the dining room,” I called back.

She dropped her luggage at the door and made her way to us. Once she was close enough I hugged her tight. It had been so long since we had last seen each other.

“I’ve missed you. It’s been so long. Are you hungry? There’s more food in the kitchen.” I said as our hug broke. 

“No thanks. I actually ate with Anna and Selah. I ran into them on my way here. It was funny at first. Seeing her without Papa. He and Liz send their love. They should be here next week. They left a few days after I did.” 

“Really? That’s sooner than expected. The wedding isn’t for a month.” 

“They missed you. You have the room don’t you?”

“Yes. We do. I’ll just have to clean the spare room. I moved everything out of the room for you into the other spare room. I guess I could move it all to Caleb’s room.” 

“Caleb lives here?” Sky looked over to Caleb who was once again eating. 

“No. He just has a room for those nights he’s too drunk to walk the extra few steps next door. He won’t need it while Papa and Liz are here. Boys clean the kitchen. Sky, I’ll show you upstairs.”

We left the boys downstairs and I helped Sky carry her bags to her room. Then we went to clean out a place for our parents.

“Why on earth do you have this much furniture? Why isn’t downstairs yet?” The room was full of couches and side tables. 

“We haven’t gotten around to it. Ben had everything moved up here before we moved in so that the bottom level could be cleaned. He wanted to make sure it was perfect for me. We haven’t had a need for it. Come on help me move it. It won’t take long.” 

We were able to move everything in a short amount of time then headed back downstairs. Luckily nothing was on fire. Caleb had a bad habit of almost burning down my house. 

“Everything is still in one piece. I’m shocked.” I looked around for any sign of fire. 

“Not everything. I broke a plate again. Sorry.” Caleb held up some shards of broken plate. “I’ll replace it after I finish helping Abe. Dumb arse still can’t get his door to shut properly.” He cleaned the final pieces of broken dish before leaving. 

“Abe is still causing problems?” Sky asked.

“Abe is always causing problems.” I replied. “Now catch me up on what has happened back in Scotland.” 

-One week later- 

Everything was set up and ready for Papa and Liz to visit, the house was clean, we had plenty of food, and Ben promised he would keep Abe as far away as he could until the actual day of the wedding.

“Are you sure it looks okay? Maybe we should wash the windows again.”

“It’s fine, Tay. It’s perfect. Besides I don’t think they would care. I’m sure they are just going to be happy to see you.”

“And not Abe. You did tell him to stay away right? I don’t want him to upset Papa.” 

Ben stood straighter, almost stiff, and looked anywhere but in my eyes which meant he hadn’t talked to Abe.

“Ben you promised. If you don’t talk to him I will and we both know that will not end pleasantly for anyone. It’s just for two weeks. Please go now. They will be here any day now.” I looked up to him with the most pitiful look I could muster up.

“Fine. I’ll go. Just know he probably won’t listen.” Ben said before heading out of the house. 

“Where is he off to?” Sky asked coming back into the house after her morning walk. 

“He’s going to tell Abe he isn’t allowed anywhere near this house or Papa until the day of the wedding. I don’t want him to do anything that might upset Papa. He’s done enough. Abe probably won’t listen but that will give you good reason to shoot him off the property since we both know Ben won’t do it.” 

“I can shoot him? Really?” Her eyes lit up at the thought.

“If he shows up anywhere near here or Papa. I want everything to be perfect. As long as Abe and Simcoe don’t show up it will be the perfect day. Really we only need to worry about Abe. Simcoe doesn’t have any idea about any of this.” 

“Right, of course. John has no idea about anything this.” Sky then went quiet for a moment which only meant one thing, she was lying.

“Skylar, what did you do?” I turned to look at her.

She laughed a bit and her eyes darted around, “I didn’t do anything. Nope nothing.” 

I continued to look at her with a threatening stare until she broke.

“I may have written to John to tell him I was returning to the states. He doesn’t know about Papa being here. I just told him I was coming see you and to return some of his things I hid away.” 

So she was his connection in the states. If she wasn’t my sister I probably would have killed her with my bare hands. I took a moment to compose my emotions before speaking again.

“Why would think it was a good idea to tell him to come here? Mail him his things. Or better yet burn them. Skylar, how many times must you be reminded of the things he did to our friends, to our family, to… Papa.” 

“He’s different with me. He loves me. Besides he was just doing what he thought was best. When he gets here, I’ll have him apologize. You have to learn to like him Tay. What’s going to happen when I marry him?” 

As soon as the words left her mouth I smacked her across the face. 

“You know that if you marry that vile monster, you will be disowned. Not just by Papa but by me, Ben, Caleb, and everyone here. You will have no one but your precious John. Which is more important to you? The family that has loved and cared for you your whole life or a man who you barely know and barely have spent any time with outside of the time you were kidnapped. The one good thing that man did was saving you but he also tainted your view of him. It’s like you worshiped him after that. Had Caleb not been injured I would have sent him after you. But why was he injured? Oh because Simcoe was torturing him! I will admit he was able to hide his joy in that well because when I came to him to help find you he made no mention of having my best friend locked in a cell on the verge of death. I think you should take time to reconsider your affection for him before it is too late.” 

She said nothing and walked straight out the front door. I followed her and stopped on the steps as she continued to walk away.

“Don’t come back until you’ve made up your mind. I don’t want to see you until you have realized what you really want out of this situation.” By this point she was gone and I was yelling to the wind. I went back in the house and waited for Ben to return from his visit with Abe.

**

“Abe wasn’t too happy about your request but Mary promised to try and keep him away from the house.” Ben said as he walked in. “I didn’t think it would be that easy but it… Why are you crying? What happened?” He sat next to me and wiped away my tears with his thumb. 

“Skylar. She still has it in her head she is going to marry Simcoe. Did you know she was his connection here? She’s the one holding on to his belongings. I told her she needs to figure out what she wants and not to return until she had everything straightened out. If she gains a husband she will lose a father and a sister.” 

Ben didn’t reply and I didn’t want him to say anything. I just wanted him be here. His presence itself was calming. We stayed this way for quite a while before someone knocked on the door. Ben stood and went to answered it. I heard the door open followed by the sound of hushed voices. Then I saw my Papa followed by Elizabeth.

“Do you know where she went?” I knew he was referring to Sky. That was probably what the whispering was about, Ben telling him what happened.

**

After walking for nearly an hour Sky realized how far she had gone. She had to be miles away from Ben and Tay’s home. She sat down on nearby fallen tree and thought about what Tay had said. Maybe she was right, Simcoe did do horrible things but he loved Sky. He told her many times of his love for her. She had never told Tay or her father but she had stayed in touch with Simcoe while in Scotland. Sky did not have much faith in religion but she could not doubt that there was someone or thing looking out for her since she was always able to get his letters from the postman without anyone in the house finding out.

She was so lost in thought she didn’t hear the footsteps coming up behind her.

“Sky, love, what are you doing here?” Sky jumped when she heard his voice. 

“John!” She jumped up and hugged him. “I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you too but that doesn’t answer my question. Why are you alone in the woods?”

“Tay and I had a fight. I needed to get away for a while and gather my thoughts. What are you doing here? I thought you weren’t going to arrive for a month.” Sky asked him while still holding him in her arms. 

“I couldn’t wait any longer. I had to see you.” Simcoe broke their embrace and held her at arms length looking at her like he was trying to memorize every detail of her look. 

“You can’t be here. If Tay or anyone else finds out they will kill you. You must leave. Please for your own safety.” Sky begged him.

“I am not afraid of your family. I am a grown man, a Queen’s Ranger. I can handle myself. Do not worry about me. I have changed. I’m not the same man I was before. Let me meet your family as the man I am now. It may take time but I’m sure they will change their minds in time.” 

Sky thought it over and debated the chances anyone would shoot him. The chance of that happening was high if they had weapons on their persons but her sister had a rule about weapons in the house. The only ones Sky had seen was the gun Ben kept in a trunk in their bedroom and the one by the door. The only reason Tay allowed them was because they were the some of the ones he used in the war and Ben told her it made him feel better knowing he could protect her should someone break into the house in the night. 

After her internal debate she finally made her decision. “Okay. We can go but if anything happens we will leave immediately. No killing.” 

“No killing.” He agreed and took her hand in his as they walked towards Tay and Ben’s house.

**

Ben looked out the window and held in a groan. He turned and looked at me. “Sweetheart I need you to stay calm. Please be as calm as you can be.” 

“I’m always calm. Why?” I walked to the window and looked out. “Oh Sky’s back. That’s great. I’ll set her a place for a dinner.”

“Do you not see who is with her?” Ben questioned as he continued to watch Sky and Simcoe walk up the path that lead to the house.

“I’m in the dinning room I can’t hear you.” I shouted to him. 

The front door opened and Sky walked in with Simcoe in tow. Ben was standing in front of them within seconds. 

“Skylar have you gone mad? Your father is here. Why on earth have you brought him here?”

Before Sky could answer, I returned from the dinning room. “Sister, I’m so glad you’re back. I was so worried something had happened to you. Don’t worry you didn’t miss dinner. I just set your place. Papa and Liz are here. They can’t wait to see you. Come now, dinner is waiting.” I made no mention of Simcoe nor paid him any mind. I took Sky’s hand and walked to the dinning room. Ben and Simcoe glanced at each other before following. 

“Look Papa. Sky has returned. Isn’t that lovely?” I said as I sat down at one of the empty seats. 

“Yes I see. She brought someone with her.” Hewlett replied through his teeth. His eyes burned as he stared at Simcoe. 

“Papa I think you’re seeing things. No one else is here. You must be tired from the trip. I suggest going straight to bed after dinner.” I smiled and started eating. 

Everyone else in the room shared a confused and concerned face. Ben sat down next to me and Sky motioned for Simcoe to wait in the sitting room. Conversation during dinner consisted mostly of Papa and Liz’s travel. Anytime someone tried to bring up Simcoe I dismissed them and changed the topic. At one point I even brought up a trip to visit Judge Woodhull’s gravesite just to avoid Simcoe. After dinner was finished and the dishes cleaned Papa, Liz, and Sky went to the sitting room where Simcoe was still waiting. I tried to follow but Ben pulled me upstairs. 

“Darling, while I much enjoy time with you alone I think it’s important I spend time with my family while they are here.” 

“What are you doing? You can’t just make him disappear by denying his presence.” 

I went stiff and turned away from him. “I don’t know what you’re talking about Ben. I’m not denying Papa is here.” 

“Tay, you know who I am talking about. Sky brought Simcoe here and you won’t acknowledge it. I don’t know why. Talk to me please.” He turned me around and held my face in his hands forcing me to look at him.

I sighed, took his hands off my face, and rested my head on his chest. Ben knew that meant I was close to breaking down, something I did not do often. 

“If I acknowledge he’s here then I have to acknowledge that my sister cares nothing for my happiness or yours or Papa’s or anyone in this town. It shows that she cares about him and herself more than she does about us. She did the one thing I asked her not to do.” 

“Sweetheart, she must have her reason. She wouldn’t do this for no reason. You know I am about as happy as you with what is happening. We must have clear heads and hear them out. Do you want me to hold my gun while he talks? If he says anything to upset you I’ll shoot him.” Ben was surprised when he felt me nod yes.  “Go downstairs. I’ll be there soon.” 

I went downstairs and sat in one of the empty arm chairs. I didn’t look at Simcoe or my sister who were sitting on one of the couches. Ben came down a few minutes later gun in hand. He sat next to me and turned to look at Sky and Simcoe.

“Skylar, please explain why you have brought Simcoe into our home even though it goes against the wishes of your sister and I.”

Sky’s eyes darted from me to Simcoe a few times before speaking. “He wants to apologize for everything. He is a changed man. Please give him give a chance.” She looked to Simcoe as a signal for him to speak.

“I have changed. If you allow me, I will show you I have learned from the error of my ways. I know I have done things to you and your family that are unforgivable but I do hope you will allow me the chance to prove I have changed.” When he spoke he looked directly at me knowing I would be the hardest person to get forgiveness from.

Without a word I stood up and left the room. I heard footsteps falling and knew instantly Caleb was following me. His heavy footfalls a dead give away. 

“So, still wanna kill him, aye?” 

“You know my feelings towards weaponry, right?”

“Well yes but by the way..”

“It took everything in my power not to take that gun from Ben and kill him right there in front of everyone. I don’t understand how Sky can do this to me, to all of us.” 

Caleb pulled me into a hug as I cried. 

“I don’t understand it either. I want him dead as much as you do. Ben feels the same. I imagine your dear Papa does as well. The only one who disagrees is your sister. Don’t worry though, this will be handled. I have a feeling things are going to change soon.” He promised as we walked back to the house. When we returned Sky and Simcoe had left. 

Papa and Liz stayed up long enough to say good night to me then headed up to the room we had offered to them. Caleb decided to stay the night as well in case Simcoe had anything planned. 

Little did we know then that Caleb’s feeling about things changing would be correct. Two nights before our wedding someone we never thought we’d see again was on our doorstep. It was late nearly 2 in the morning and it appeared I was the only one who was woken up by the knock.

“I am very sorry for the late hour but please tell me she’s here. I have to see her. I was told she was in town for your wedding. Congratulations. ” John Andre looked like a broken man. Which wasn’t that surprising seeing as he had spent nearly over a year in a prison cell. In all honestly he should have been hanged but Ben was able to get him a prison sentence as to not cause my sister the heartbreak of losing him. It took a lot of convincing but Ben was good with words. 

Andre was her first love but he was chasing after Peggy Shippen leaving Sky to fool herself into thinking she loved Simcoe.

“Keep your voice down.” I hushed him and pushed him away from the doorway before stepping out and closing the door behind. “There are three men in there that are still happy to hang you.” 

“Three? Besides your fiancé who else do you house?”

“His best friend and fellow solider, Caleb Brewster. And my father is currently with us. He wants you dead because you broke my sisters heart.” I crossed my arms as I spoke and gave him a glare.

“That is why I’m here. I want to talk to Skylar. All those months alone gave me much time to think and I realized Peggy is nothing compared to her. 

Skylar is who I truly love and she must know that. I will understand if she has found another but I would still like to speak to her. If I may. Why are you smiling like that? Please stop it’s scary. How is your face smiling that wide? That must hurt.” Andre took a full step back from me. 

“I will happily take you to my sister but it is very late. Please come in and rest. You can stay in the room intended for my sister. But stay quiet and don’t leave the room until I come for you.” 

He nodded in agreement and I let him into the house showing him to the upstairs room. 

I quickly returned to bed and prayed Ben was still sleeping. Thankfully he was and I didn’t have to answer any questions about who was at the door.

The next morning Ben took Papa and Liz around the town showing Liz everything and Papa the things that had changed. They had asked me to do it but I told them I was up late that night which wasn’t a complete lie. I was up late I just didn’t give them a reason. Caleb had gone back to his own home so that he could change clothes. 

As soon as everyone was out of the house I pulled Andre out of the room he had been hiding in. I handed him a cloak and instructed him to pull the hood tight. 

“I don’t want anyone to see you. Come, hurry.” 

We made our way to the local inn and went straight to Sky’s room. It only took a few threats to the inn keeper to find out which room was hers. 

“Breakfast! Time for waffles and chocolate! Just put it…” Sky’s sentence was cut off by one of the loudest screams I’ve ever heard. 

“Surprise. He wants to talk. I know Simcoe isn’t here, I saw him walking towards town, so you are free to talk. I love you, sister.” I shoved Andre into the room and closed the door. I considered staying and listening in on what happened but decided against incase Simcoe did return. I did not want to have any chance of seeing him. 

I quickly left the inn and went in search of one of my friends. I walked into the tavern and found Anna cleaning tables. 

“Oh Anna, I have the most marvelous news!” I said in a sing-song voice before sitting down at the table she was wiping down. 

“Are you going to share this news? Or make me guess?”

“I don’t have time for you to guess because you never will. You’ll want to sit down for this.” I waited for her to sit down before continuing my story. “Andre has returned. He showed up on my doorstep around 2 in the morning last night. He said that during his time in prison he realized how much he truly loved Sky and not Peggy. He wanted to talk to her and express his love to her!”

Anna took a minute to process everything I said before speaking, “But she loves Simcoe now? She gave up on Andre because he was chasing Peggy.” 

“No. She only thinks she loves Simcoe. What she really loves is the idea of Simcoe. Someone who showers her with attention, complements her, doesn’t ignore her at all, is clingy. I could go on but you get the idea. Once she realizes where her true love lies she will leave Simcoe, be with her one true love, they will attend my wedding, and everyone will live happily ever after. Except Simcoe because he will be dead. Yay.” Anyone within five miles could hear the cheerfulness in my voice. 

“Tay, your wedding is tomorrow. You think Andre is going to be able to win Sky back in 24 hours? Even if he does, Edmund won’t accept him. You know how protective he is of you girls.” 

“He’s letting me marry an American rebel spy. I’m sure he will be happy she’s not with Simcoe.” I shrugged and looked towards the door that had just opened. 

“I heard my name. I came to see if you needed my assistance.” Simcoe, once again thinking he owned the place, waltzed in and sat down. “Mrs. Strong, hello, I’d like a drink. Please.” 

I could tell he added the please as an after thought to try and show me he could be polite. I scowled at him and said goodbye to Anna before leaving. I figured by this point in the day Ben, Papa, and Liz would be back at home. Thankfully I was correct and Caleb was there as well. 

Liz seemed to notice my happiness and asked what happened while the group was gone.

“Well, shocking news, Andre has returned. He is currently confessing his love for Skylar.” I went on to explain everything that occurred the night before and this morning. “So there you have it. By this time tomorrow Ben and I will be married and Sky will not longer be in love with Simcoe. It’ll be perfect.” 

“You got out of bed in the night to answer the door without me? It could have been a murderer.” Of course that was the part of the story Ben caught. 

“Ben that is not the important part of this story. What is important is that Andre is going to win Sky back and Simcoe will be gone!” 

“What are you doing here?” Sky’s voice was barely above a whisper. “Ben had you sent to prison.” 

“My love the only real permeant sentence is death. I truly am thankful to the rebel major who spared my life.” 

“He did it for me. It wasn’t easy but he figured I would be upset if you were dead.”

“Is that your way of saying you wouldn’t care if I lived or died?” He stepped forward and tried to take her hand but she moved a step back. 

“Why do you care? Why are you here? Why aren’t you with Peggy?”

  “The answer to all three question is you. During my time in prison I had so much time to myself to think about my life and the choices I made that lead me where I was. I realized that I did not love her but I loved you. My biggest regret was that I had broken your heart to chase after someone who would never level to you. She could never live up to your intellect, your wit, your beauty. You are the only woman I will ever truly love. Tell me if you have found another to hold your heart and I will leave at once and never return. But I pray that you tell me otherwise and I have the chance to gain back your love.” At this point he was begging on his knees. 

Sky was in shock. She never excepted to see him again let alone have him confess his undying love for her. She was speechless. Her emotions were a mix of happiness for his confession, anger for the original betrayal, and confusion about her love for Simcoe. She truly believed she loved him but she also loved Andre. 

“I need a moment. Please.” She was finally able to open her mouth and let those few words out. 

“Of course. I will see if the inn keeper has a room for me. Though I imagine your sisters invitation to stay in her home is open. The bed was very comfortable.” 

Sky laughed, “You stayed with Tay? What did Ben say?”

“He didn’t know. She was able to hide me away before he or your father saw me. I will tell you the story at a later time. Take time to think. I will return for your answer.” He simply smiled at her before leaving the room. 

While Andre was getting settled into his own room at the inn Simcoe returned. 

“You’re upset.” The simple words from Simcoe caused more tears from Sky. She had made her decision and now had to tell everyone. 

“I’m sorry, John. So sorry.” She whispered and wiped the tears from her face. 

“What are you talking about? What happened while I was gone?” 

“Andre. He has returned.” She sighed and decided that it was best to be truthful with him, “I love him, John. I will forever be grateful for the time we shared but I must go to him.”

Simcoe said nothing but his face was a rainbow of emotions ranging from anger to sadness. 

“If this is what you want, I will respect this decision. Tell your sister how this ended. That I didn’t yell or throw things. No guns were fired. I peacefully walked away.” He kissed her on the cheek and took his bag. “You know my heart will always be a shrine to our love. Should you ever need anything you know how to contact me. Goodbye Skylar.” 

As he walked down the hall to the staircase he noticed Andre exiting his room. Simcoe looked at Andre for a split second before stepping onto the staircase. 

After Simcoe walked by him Andre returned to Sky. She was staring out the window watching Simcoe walk away.

“My dear?” Andre stood behind her and put his hand on her shoulder. She turned into him and rested her cheek on his chest. 

“If it isn’t obvious I have chosen you.” She felt the movement of Andre’s chest as he chuckled slightly.

“I figured as such. If you need time, I understand.” 

“We should probably talk about a few things, like my father and future brother-in-law hating you.” 

Andre agreed and they each took a seat at the small table in the room. The couple talked for hours even skipping lunch. It wasn’t until Tay arrived to see how things had gone that they finally left the room. 

“John Andre you have given me the best wedding gift I could ever ask for, unless someone kills Simcoe than that will be the best. For right now though, you are the winner.” Tay clapped and smiled, “It’s dinner time. Come you need to meet everyone in a new light. Except Liz because you haven’t met her at all so clean slate with her. Come along hurry up the rain is starting and I didn’t bring the carriage we have to walk.” 

Just as the first flash of lightening struck the trio returned to Ben and Tay’s home where the family was waiting for them. Once the introductions were down the interrogation started. All three men, Ben, Caleb, and Hewlett, questioned Andre on his motives and intentions. It seemed all his answers lived up to what they wanted and Andre was invited to stay and attend the wedding happening the next day. 

We all sat down to dinner and discussed the plans for what would happen at the wedding. 

“I think all the guest are in town except George and Martha. The letter they sent said they would most likely arrive late into the night. While I was at the inn today I made them a reservation.” A moment after I said this a knock came from the door. 

Ben stood and went to answer it. “It’s a good thing you made extra servings of dinner, Tay.” Ben said as he returned with George and Martha following. I quickly stood and hugged them both. 

“It’s been far too long since I’ve last seen you.” 

“We would have been here sooner but an incident occurred that caused us to be late.” George explained as he and Martha sat down. “During the storm our carriage unfortunately hit a man. We were able to locate your towns doctor and he is being cared for there.”

“I wish we knew his name. I hope he is okay.” Martha added. “But that shouldn’t hinder the excitement of tomorrow’s events.” 

We changed the subject back to the wedding and the unnamed man was not mentioned again. Shortly after dinner plates were washed and put away everyone went to bed. Sky and Andre graciously offered to show the Washingtons to the inn. 

“Are you nervous?” Ben asked as we got into bed. 

“A little. Mainly I’m worried about tripping as I walk. Are you nervous?” 

“Not all. Tomorrow is going to the best day of our lives.”

“Such a romantic. We should sleep. The faster we sleep the faster we wake up. The faster we wake up the faster the we can get married.” We both laughed and went to bed. 

The morning came quickly and soon Sky, Liz, and Anna were whisking me away from Ben to get me dressed. 

“Stop fidgeting. I can’t curl your hair if you keep moving.” Anna ordered as she wrapped my hair around a hot curling rod. 

“She can’t help it she’s excited.” Sky laughed as she and Liz worked on pinning their hair styles into place. “She’s just so happy to rid herself of the Hewlett name.” 

“That is not at all true.” I stuck my tongue out at her and laughed. 

“Are you calling me a liar?” She gasped.

“Well I ain’t calling you a truther!” I came back at her which sent us all into a fit of laughter.

After we were all done joking around and getting ready we made our way to the church. As usual I was very early. I had a habit of always being the first one to an event.

“Why are we here before the reverend?” Sky asked sitting next to me on one of the benches. 

“One, you know I like to be super early and the first to an event. Two, Ben’s father is marrying us I’m sure he’s with Ben.” 

The four of us waited about an hour before Reverand Townsend arrived. 

“This is why you are so good for Benjamin. You will make sure he is always on time.” He chuckled and kissed my cheek. “You look lovely my dear. Ben won’t know what hit him.” 

The guest started arriving and soon we were just waiting for Ben and Caleb. 

“Tay, stop moving or he will see you. This is why the bride is suppose to be the last to arrive not the first.” Anna said as she pushed me back behind the back of the church wall. We had moved outside to hide me away before Ben arrived. 

Finally Papa and Caleb arrived and told us Ben was ready and waiting in the church. Liz and Anna made their way in and took their seats. Caleb and Sky joined arms and started the walk to the end of the aisle. They had a plan to high five at the end and I imagine from the few laughs that they actually did it. 

Then it was my turn. Papa took my arm and we stood at the door for a good minute without speaking. I turned to him and noticed tears on his cheeks. 

“Papa…” I smiled and wiped away the tears.

“My little girl. All grown up and getting married. I’m so proud of you. I’ve watched you go from spoiled little girl who thought the stars revolved around her to one of the most amazing young ladies I have had the privilege of knowing. I am honored to be your father. Raising you and your sister will always be the best thing I ever did. I think I did it right. You’ve gotten this far. Benjamin is a fine man. I know you will have a wonderful like together. Even if you are far from home. Don’t forget your dear old Papa okay?”

“I could never forget you Papa. And I think you did a pretty good job raising us. Maybe not the best in the eyes of the King seeing as I’m marrying an American spy but you know King George is jerk and not here. Then there’s the whole Sky and Simcoe thing but he’s gone now. Hopefully. So yeah you did pretty great. Now we should probably go in before Ben thinks I ran off on him.” 

The doors open and slowly we walked towards the end of the aisle. I looked up and found Ben’s sapphire eyes within a second. He looked so handsome wearing his uniform which was finally all cleaned up. As soon as we locked eyes he blushed. Once Papa and I reached the end I released his hand and took Ben’s. Papa kissed my cheek and sat down next to Liz. 

“We are gathered here today to witness the union of my idiot son and this beautiful young lady he somehow tricked into marrying him. Really dear, blink twice if you want to run.” I imagine if this were anyone else wedding he would have taken his job seriously but the Reverend and I had the same sense of humor. 

Soon it was time for the vows. I suggested just using the generic ones but Ben begged for ones we wrote ourself and I finally agreed.

“And now for the vows Benjamin she told me to make you go first.” the Reverend looked to his son.

Ben shook his head, “Of course she did.” He looked directly at me and took my hands, “I knew I wanted to marry you the first time I heard you speak. You were arguing with your sister about the war. Standing in the middle of town you acted as if no one was listening, including your father’s men who were standing no more than 10 feet away. Once I heard you say, ‘The Americans are going to win the war because they have better outfits.’ I knew I wanted to find out who you were. It took many attempts but I got your name and tracked you down. You were leaving Strong’s tavern and without thinking I took your arm. You turned and I’m pretty sure you were ready to kill me but instead you said “You have sapphire eyes. I want my children to have sapphire eyes.” I could on and quote every word you’ve ever said to me or even just around me. I hope to one day be able to quote every word that ever leaves your mouth. You are truly the love of my life and I hope to never be separated from you. I promise I will do my best to be the best husband you could ever dream of having. I love you.” 

Then it was my turn. 

“First, I didn’t cry just now so I win the bet.” I looked at Mary Woodhull who was sitting with her son Thomas. I rarely cry and she bet that I would cry at Ben’s vows. “Okay now I can start. I was totally going to punch you the first time we met. I mean really you should know better than to grab a lady by the arm late at night. Then I saw your eyes and I fell in love with them. It didn’t take long for me to fall in love with the rest of you. Someone once said “There are dreamers and there are realist in this world. You’d think the dreamers would find the dreamers, and the realist would find the realist, but more often than not, the opposite is true. See, the dreamers need the realist to keep them from soaring too close to the sun. And the realist? Well, without the dreamers, they might not ever get off the ground”. I like to think I’m a dreamer who has found my realist in you. I never thought I would find someone, besides my father and sister, who could put up with me the way you do. I know I can be stubborn and headstrong. Sometimes I jump the gun and get over excited over the little things. For a long time I flew too close to the sun and you brought me back down. And from what Caleb has told me I like to believe I’ve help you fly even just a little. Everyday I am thankful to have you. I love you with a love I never thought I had. I promise to love you with that love everyday for the rest of forever.”

Pretty sure everyone in the room was crying at that point. I can be pretty romantic if I try hard enough. 

Then it was time for rings. Caleb took them from his pocket and gave them to us. I carefully slipped the gold band on Ben’s finger and then he dropped mine. Thankfully Sky was able to grab it before it rolled away and Ben put it on my finger. He looked up from my hand and smiled adorably. 

“I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride.”

Ben gently kissed me then took my hand as we walked down the aisle. We went back to the Strong’s tavern for a reception. 

“Congratulations, you look lovely.” I heard Andre’s voice behind me and turned to see him and Sky together. 

“Thank you. I am so happy you are here and not that other person who almost tried to be here. Thankfully he isn’t here at all. Who even knows where Simcoe is currently? Don’t answer that. I don’t care because he isn’t here.” 

“Did you say a Simcoe was suppose to be here?” Martha Washington cut in as she walked up to hug me and Ben. George was off talking with Papa. “I ask because that is the name of the man our carriage hit last night. I saw the doctor this morning and asked his name.”

“Is he dead?” I said with such excitement in my voice that even Ben gave me a disapproving look.

“Thankfully no. He will live. Sadly they had to take both his legs. He’ll never walk again.” 

“He’ll be fine. Let’s change the subject. Weren’t Ben’s vows precious? He’s wonderful.” Really I could have gone on about Simcoe but today was my day. Well also kind of Ben’s day but mostly mine. 

The reception party went one for a few hours before everyone parted ways. Our immediate families, including Caleb, the Strongs, and Andre, returned to our home with us. 

We were all packed for our honeymoon, we were gong to France for a whole month. Sky helped me out of my wedding dress into one more suitable for travel.

“Be careful. Don’t get into fights. Don’t get hurt. If anyone tries to hurt you..”

“Papa, you’re talking to me not Sky. She gets hurt and into fights not me. Plus I have Ben to protect me.” I laughed as Papa continued on with is lists. Liz was able to stop him and they both hugged us goodbye. 

This pattern seemed to continue with Ben’s family before just our friends were left. Anna and Selah only stayed a few minutes longer before wishing us luck and saying goodbye. 

Caleb hugged me tight, even lifting me off the a ground a bit, then released me. “I know everyone said this but be careful. And have fun. Bring my Benny back to me. I promise the house will look the exact same when you get back.” 

Sky laughed, “I promise that I’ll make sure Caleb keeps his promise. Benjamin if anything happens to my sister I suggest you run. Though I will find you. I will kill you. Then I will throw your body into a fire.”

“I promise to make sure nothing happens.” Ben laughed causing her to hit him and tell him how serious she was. 

“Sky be nice. Please please please make sure Caleb keeps his promise. I do want to return to a house not a pile ash.” I heard Caleb grumble in the background about not burning anything down. “Andre, I would greatly appreciate having you and my sister for dinner once we return. I would like to get to you know better and outside the military.” 

“Of course. I look forward it. Have a pleasant trip. France is a beautiful country.” 

“Thank you. Watch out for my sister. She can be a hand full at times.” After I made that comment Sky stuck her tongue out at me. 

We said our final goodbye before Ben loaded our trunks onto a carriage. He helped me up before taking his own seat. 

“I can finally call you my wife. That makes me so happy.”

“And I can call you my husband. Today was perfect. Besides finding out Simcoe was still alive.”

“I swear if you mention Simcoe one time on this trip I will leave you in France.” 

“Thats fine. I can go find Layafette. I’m sure he would be happy to have me in his home.” 

“You are the worst human being I have ever met.” 

“Lies. I am the best. You married me. You had the choice so you can’t complain. You chose me.” I laughed and rested my head against his shoulder.

“Yes, I did and I am very thankful for that.”

~~A few years later~~

After our honeymoon Ben and I returned home to, thankfully, a not burned down house. Our first children, twin boys, were born a little over a year after our wedding, we named them George Washington and Edmund Samuel. Sky and Andre were in the midst of planning their own wedding, which everyone was very excited about. Papa and Liz discovered a new planet and were currently writing a book about it. Caleb was, well, still Caleb. He took his role of Uncle Caleb very seriously. For the most part everyone was happy, healthy, and thriving. Expect Simcoe because no one ever heard from him again after the town doctor stuck him on a boat to England. He might be dead who knows or cares. Not me. 

[bibbleboo]

not to alarm anyone im prob fine cuz lbr if im still here by now im prob never gonna do it but ohhh4hjh5j4hj54 the s/ui thoughts lately lads. the ‘literally no aspect of existing in any way in this universe feels worth it even a little bit’ thoughts. ive been in this depression for like prob over a year now btw its just coming in big up and down waves and lately its been . real bad. mostly bc i didnt wanna bring it up bc its one of those 'i have no way out of this situation so whining abt its gonna make me feel guilty and hopeless and wont improve my state of mind in the slightest so why bother' but. might as well idk

i take care of my sisters kids like a literal fuckin cinderella from the minute i wake up (8 ish) till 2 am. this was not our plan. when i moved in i was supposed to pay for my share of bills and my own food and work on learning adult shit and how to take care of myself. instead im doing genuinely 50% or . frnakly M O R E of the hands on caretaker work. often by myself while she smokes weed and hangs out. im not joking when i say i have almost no free time. the free time i get is too unpredictable to make productive. its nearly 6 am rn as i type this. i get 3-5 hours of sleep a night, bc she wakes me up early, and goes to bed late, and if i have anything i need to do, i have to stay up a few hours later than her. she wittled my boundaries into this like everybody in my life always does when they need shit from me. and this means i cant take care of myself bc im disabled and like. im not allowed to be. nobody can do it anymore ig so im tryna figure out how or if i can take care of myself but. i have been begging to be given even just the opportunity for independence for Y E AR S but im constantly roped into filling other family members needs instead. so i quite fucking literally do not have MOMENTS of time to work on this. im stagnated, i was never given the chance to take care of myself bc i was stuck in this, so. she still has to do (most of) shit stuff like drive me around and cook dinner and clean and call my drs and get groceries and bro like i KNOW thats hard. but ive expressed before, 'either u take care of ur own kids and i fill my responsibilities so we’re both just taking care of our own shit we should already take care of, or it stays the same swinging pendulum bc i literally dont have the capacity to balance this'. 

ive been running on fucking empty for years dude. i didnt know it was POSSIBLE to feel This exhausted and hollowed and drained. its pure misery. i feel like my spirit is being siphoned. i feel like nothing anymore. im running on fumes and have been for years ive BEGGED all of my family all thsi time please fucking let me catch my breath i literally truly cannot do this. and im told im in debt and have to for having needs. im always gonna be in debt. im not allowed to ask for more than i can give back so if i cant manage that too bad so sad. so im. literally stuck in this hopeless fucking cycle of being needy and burning ymself out from guilt. 

and we’ve talked abt it before like im already bitter abt this shit right and she KNOWS its killing me. but. the other day . i got so sick from bronchitis i had to go to the er and spent days doing almost nothing but sleeping and coughing right. i was so fucking sick i felt like i could pass out and i couldnt breathe. i was no exaggeration sickest id been since i had swine flu. and she . told me i had to watch her kids so she could go pick up my antibiotic. which i understand but she got mad when at first i said i didnt know if i could. and i cant. help that. but the next morning i had the strength . so i sat there with the kids barely holding on while she got them. she came back. i went to go back to bed. she literally tried to force her kid into my hands dude. i put my foot down bc she outright only asked for me to do that until she got back and also why would she expect. a sick person whos Medicine shes going to pick up would be in the state to take care of her children immediately after. i legit couldnt do that. and then she threw the biggest text tantrum at me over it. saying 'adults still have to do things when theyre sick' and how i dont do enough and she said it was like having a third child and it. ngl kinda broke me a little like lmao ! girl ive been SLAVING FOR YOUUU PPL THAT I TELL ABT THIS SITUATION THINK UR A FUCKING >>>JOKE<<<< THE WAY U GOT ME PICKING UP UR SLACK and ur telling me im over here literally more worn out and broken than i thought was possible for a human being and its. nowhere near enough for you. like i thought this was unbalanced but in a different way YOU actually think it skews to YOUR side..... bro is it ever gonna be enough then lmao?? am i ever gonna be allowed to live debt free???

its just. to realize im over here grinding myself into dust when truly nobody is going to care. theres never gonna be a moment where they sit back and realize what ive sacrificed, literally all the health i have in me short of dying, all the spirit i have, im utterly broken inside and out just so i didnt have to see them suffer. and they got what they wanted so they hardly care. i mean shes so used to this, she felt ENTITLED to my help with it. she literally just automatically views these kids as partly my responsibility...... i cried all fucking day abt that dude. im trying so hard to live a happy life where i take care of myself, am not a burden, and not a slave either. why. is this my life. literally what did i do WRONG. to be constantly treated this way over and over and over again. why am i so irresistible to take advantage of why am i in this cycle how do i get out of it why is every choice too hard will i literally Ever find happiness in this like. doom! dread! i exist to be used abused and losed ! one day ill be homeless and wont know how to cope bc i was too busy fixing everybody else and i wont know how to maintain myself bc i wasnt allowed to learn !! life is a prison a nd idk how to do it anymore!! oh and ofc not to mention, i literally love these kids more than anything else and despite the suffering theyre fullstop the only thing keeping me alive, and i think that Would be the thing to legit make me k/ms if i couldnt see them ever again no way around it id never get through that so. that also has me stuck. lmfao. tldr; life sucks. pain. misery even

[professor-abeloved]

For the ship breakdown.. It's so cliché and others will most likely ask the same, but JakexMC? Any gender!

this is a lil late but thanks anon!! using my masc presenting mc, eli de loyola!! tbh i was expecting this since it’s the most popular endsum ship lmao. 

(sidenote: i should probably say that i don’t rly do f!mc/jake because it’s…the most popular ship in the fandom haha. it’s nothing personal, and i bet your f!mc & jake are adorable together, but you don’t need me when there are so many people who would kill for the chance to make content for it yanno? idk if this is making sense lol)

((sidenote 2: i’m not taking anymore ships for this ask meme either adkfglds tho the link is there in case anyone wants to reblog it!))

SEND ME A SHIP AND I’LL BREAK THEM DOWN

How did they they meet?

the plane ride to la huerta where eli called jake “hotness” because he panicked and can’t flirt for shit. jake was so amused, especially since eli stuck to his guns and continues to call him “hotness” despite the situation afhbsjdhfnd

Who developed romantic feelings first?

jake did!! despite the fact that he tried so hard not to, he fell for eli’s enthusiasm, his heroic nature, the way he can keep up with and understand jake… and the adorable way he cannot flirt for shit.

eli doesn’t know how to deal with Feelings so he was in denial for the longest time lmao

Who is their biggest “shipper?”

diego currently holds that title

When did they have their first kiss and under what circumstances?

tbh in canon, they kissed in each other’s arms as they fellow below the waves… but i hc that their first kiss happened waaay before that when eli couldn’t deal with his feelings and jake was being adorable annoying so he ended up grabbing the front of jake’s jacket and kissing him

they made out for a bit before eli came to his senses and ran away (and continued to run and avoid jake, which really hurt him and fuled his ‘mc should stay away because i don’t want to get attached and/or hurt them’ shtick #ILoveAngst)

Who confessed their feelings first?

jake when they slept together for the first time

What was their first official date?

eli says its smth mundane like a date in the coffeeshop, but jake considers their first date the first time he took eli up in a plane (this is in a happy angst free au shush)

How do they feel about double dates/group dates?

idk i feel like jake wouldnt be fond of them and eli dont really curr

What do they do in their down time?

idk i feel like theyd go flying a lot if jake gets his own plane (courtesy of aleister who has inherited rourke industries idk man just let them be happy)

What was the first meeting of parents as an official couple like?

i hc jakes parents as dead & at first jake didnt make a good first impression on eli’s aunt tho ‘cause she didn’t appreciate his snark lol

What was their first fight over and how did they get past it?

their first fight was when eli went with #TeamSean to get shit done instead of partying with sila jake because 1) he feels like its the right thing to do and 2) he’s avoiding jake (this is after their first kiss btw.) 

and tbh at first jake’s angry bc he thinks sean is like idk Forcing eli to go but then eli gets mad (he’s a sean stan no matter who he’s dating js). the stress of the whole island situation as well as his feelings for jake cause him to say shit he regrets. jake’s understandably hurt by it, and he makes it into a bigger fight (because he’s looking for excuses to detach himself from eli) lol

Which one is more easily made jealous?

jake lmao. although you’d expect eli to be more jealous (since he’s already tsundere af) eli is merely amused when someone flirts with jake (tbh he’d be likely to give em a high five HAHA @ yvonne)

What is their favourite thing to get to eat?

whiskey. idk. i feel like jake’s a meat person tho

Who’s the cuddly one? What their favourite cuddling position?

eli is more cuddly asgfdsas he used to be big spoon, but then jake wanted to try so now they jetpack

Are they hand holders?

yeah first chapter pa lang, holding hands na awow

How long do they wait before sleeping together for the first time? What’s the circumstances?

they stop being babies about their feelings and sleep together the night before the watchers come (that is to say, they come before the watchers do bfhdkjsk why am i allowed to be online)

Who tops?

they switch it up a lot but also consider power bottom jake pls and thank

What’s the worst first they’ve ever gotten into?

hmm maybe about jake not attempting to clear his name and not returning to the US idk

Who does the shopping and the cooking?

they feel like a Take-Out kind of couple lmao. but they shop together bc jake just gets the bare essentials and eli cant cook a romantic dinner with just one (1) can of tuna wtf jake

Which one is more organized and prone to tidiness?

i feel like theyre both messy, but jake has a System to get his shit while eli is just… kalat

Who proposes?

diego proposes for both of them HAHA legit he deadass plans a romantic dinner for them and hands jake a ringbox and has jake propose, which he happily does so

but seriously if diego hadn’t intervened it probs wouldve taken 20 years before either of them even mentioned proposing dnfdksasdsja

Do they have joined Bachelor/Bacheloette parties or separate?

joined and then there’s a bit about jake and stripping and pilot uniform soooooo

Who is the best man/maid of honour? Any other groomsmen or bridesmaids?

es gang as groomsen and bridesmaids, diego is eli’s best man and idk sean is jake’s (since i hc them to get close after the events of ES)

Big Ceremony or Small?

small

Do they have a honeymoon? If so, where?  

costa rica HAHAAHA

Do they have children? How many?

jake doesn’t seem like the type to want kids, but eli really loves taking care of people, so they compromise and get a dog HAHA. the dog doesn’t like jake at first (since jake is,, like a cat lmao)

but here comes one incident at their home (cant decide where they live yet lol) where eli isn’t home & the dog sniffs out a fire which gives him and jake time to escape… but then the dog gets stuck somewhere and jake curses but goes back to save it 

and the dog finally warms up to him afterwards!! jake pretends to act like he isnt fond of the dog but his mouth kind of twitches into a smile after he loudly complains about the dog drool on his face (after the dog licks him in greeting aww)

[bcydbeaulieu]

for @kahlilravishans, my wife’s, bday || part 8 of 8

ok so this is it… the end. this was going to be second but i thought why not end with this. this is where it is going to get a bit emotional… so if you don’t want to hear all the gay that i am about to say then just look at the pretty edit. emily you are not allowed to skip this so buckle up babe… because you know how i can get when i decide i want to gift you some words… ok here we go!

ok so funny story… i wasn’t gonna start out this way but i was going through the early days of our tag and well i wished you a happy bday a year ago.. specifically while you were trying to get through interludes. so can you believe its been a fucking year since icos and our 12 hours skype sessions. those were the days were our relationship grew from “still had some chill” to “are you sure you two aren’t dating” so damn that book series. but seriously just needed to point that out. now here comes my incoherent babbling about how much i love you and how much you really mean to me. 

so, i’m pretty sure everyone knows the story of how me and emily met. god knows we talk about it enough. but it wouldn’t be an emotional emily and laura post if i don’t mention it so lol. i remember it, that february day, oh god. so she idk follows me or finds my blog and at the time i had a neil url and she just starts yelling at me on the chat. that stupid fucking messaging system. and of course i just start screaming back. and in the back of my mind i’m thinking how do i get this nerd girl to keep talking to me about our foxes and really i didn’t have to do much bc we exchanged numbers (she made me get a whatsapp) the next hour. and guys look.. i didn’t do this type of stuff before. i randomly talked to people and the only person i kept in contact with was my irlbff. so emily was not a normal occurrence. but anyways she asked if she could call and my heart was like beating out of my chest cause omfg what the fuck but of course i said yes and that’s how i find myself outside mid day on a february in texas walking around my front yard, my backyard, and yelling about literally everything we had in common at the time. 

now, i thought this girl is awesome and every part of me wanted to keep talking to her but i just knew that we’d talk for a month a few at max and then you know that thing would happen where you just lost connection, even tho i felt like i had just found like part of my soul. 

not what happened. the next week or couple of weeks we had our first skype session.. it lasted 6 hours yall. like who does that with someone they just met. fast forward to late august of 2016 and there we are getting into icos against our better judgement and there its kind of history. with our 12 hour skype sessions. and us eating dinner and breakfast together on opposite ends of the world and in complete different timezones. and i don’t know if something just clicked then cause we were already too close for our situation. but after that it was like i knew that this wasn’t some fluke this was real. and i HAD found a part of my soul. and god that’s cheesy but it’s fucking true. i’d run to the end of the world for this girl. and i’d do it multiple times. 

so that’s part of the story i guess. but i’m not done talking and emily i’m sorry babe but you know how i get i’m gonna write some more here so really buckle up. 

when i say i love you emily, i truly mean it with every part of me. i’ve never had a relationship like i have with you and the ones i had that came close don’t even touch to what we have. you’re so much more than my best friend and i don’t have a word for it and i don’t think words could justify it. but you keep my world spinning sometimes and then others you can make it stop. you are my rock when i need someone to ground me. you are the light in my life when i can’t seem to even get one positive thought in my mind. you support me through everything that i do and truly believe that i can be great at my career and in life in general. and i don’t know where i would be without you. 

you’re a good listener. you give great advice. and sometimes you just help me to stop thinking. you do so much for me and i hope that on the flipside i’m doing everything that i can for you. our relationship isn’t perfect and i’m glad it isn’t im glad that we can talk as honestly as we do and that we don’t keep anything from each other. and sometimes i’m amazed at how honest we can be bc so much of our relationship is over text or phone and its so easy to not say things when you’re not in person. but i would never let myself not be fully myself with you and that comes down to even the parts of me that i don’t want anyone to see. 

i’m also so happy that i’m the person that you talk to even when you don’t want to talk to anyone. i can’t believe i’m that person for someone, that person that even when the world is too much i’m not. that you trust me enough to be that person… it means… literally everything to me. 

you are always the highlight of my day, your snaps, texts, stupid messages, emojis, the fact that we’re each others screensavers. god that is freakin gay wow. i wanted to go through posts and like remember our relationship for the PAST YEAR AND A HALF CAN YOU BELIEVE LOL. but haa its like 55 pages and i don’t think i could summarize the best points cause they’re all just so good. we’re fucking legendary sometimes, you know. god this is a mess. this girl knew there was a hurricane happening in texas before i could tell her and has been the most dramatic about it. so if that says anything. 

“Perhaps it is true that we do not really exist until there is someone there to see us existing, we cannot properly speak until there is someone who can understand what we are saying in essence, we are not wholly alive until we are loved.”

This quote, this fucking quote ok wow. like ya do shit for yourself and you can create your own happiness blah blah like cool but babe sometimes you are the thing that makes me feel alive. and knowing that there is someone out there that loves me as much as i’m 100% you do keeps me going day to day. i’d swim across the damn fucking ocean for you. and one day we’ll get to see each other in person and it’ll probably be the best damn time of our lives and i can’t fucking wait for it bc it’s gonna happen. and we’re gonna road trip with son and yell at each other about music and scream in person about our favorite characters and spend hours reading together and probably some times on our computers not talking, bc honestly half our skype sessions are us just silently soaking in each other’s company and i wouldn’t change that for the world. 

you are without a doubt one of the most important people in my life, if not the most important and i can’t explain how it feels to have someone that knows me as well as you do and to have that in return with you. i love that as our relationship has grown it’s gone from we have all these things in common in fandom to we have certain fandom things in common but our lives are intertwined and even if we had nothing like that in common it wouldn’t matter. i know you have class on wednesday, i know you can’t skype in the early hours of morning but you will take my call. i know you live in the middle of nowhere and it takes like an hour to get to the city. i know your dad is australian but 50% of the time i hear him speak it’s with that terrible american accent. and well here…

The things i know about emily: she hates coffee but she will try every concoction she can to stay awake while reading, she loves her new puppy even though she said she wasn’t that attached, she has way too many comics (this girl set up a store on ebay ok), she is the most indecisive person to ever grace the earth, her books are arranged in alphabetic order correctly but only after i made sure they were correct, she loves rock music and can’t stand pop, she’s one of the most gorgeous people in the world but doesn’t believe it (uhm she should tho), she…. ok i could go on forever and i can never do those questions on tumblr bc i know everything about her. 

omg this should prob end soon, but like ok emily this is just a mess and i’m sorry but just if you didn’t know i love you more than anything and i hope you have a wonderful day and that we have many more bdays of yours to celebrate even when you don’t want to celebrate them. i’m so glad that you messaged me that day bc there would be a hole in my life without you. you’re amazing, incredible, outstanding, kind, hilarious, an asshole, and like my soulmate. also i’m listening to stand by me while writing this (the power rangers version) so just… i’m about to cry with how much you mean. 

to emily: i love you i love you i love you. and i will love you until the stars i’m looking at now and the ones you will see when you’re reading this can be looked at while we sit with each other outside one of our houses. and i will keep loving you through the distance and the ocean and the fights and the tears and the stubbornness of the world for not letting us be closer in the first place. you have undoubtedly changed my life for the better. you have made me a better person. more confident, happier, and somehow calm. there are days when you make my heart race (gay) and days when you make me still. (raven cycle much). you are my person (lol grey’s) and you are the first person i think of in any situation (laura no we don’t want to hear about this emily girl in australia). so baby girl, again i hope you have the best day and obviously the best life and i’m just so glad that i get to be a part of it even from so far away. i love you (to the moon and back and all that shit) <3

Oh, won’t you take me from this valley To that mountain high above? I will pray, pray, pray Until I see your smiling face. I will pray, pray, pray To the one I love.