#their unhinged self

[jadequarze]

Astrel’s actual harpy self, aka swooning over this harpy lady

[sunderwight]

Modern AU where Shen Yuan accidentally sugar-daddies everyone.

So for the purposes of this, Shen Yuan's family is basically $10 Bananas levels of cluelessly rich. Shen Yuan has almost never had to look at the prices of anything he wants. He and his siblings all get an allowance from the family's main account, which increases when they reach adulthood, and in the interest of fairness his parents made it all the same size. So Shen Yuan gets the same amount of money for his daily living expenses as his older brothers with their penthouse apartments and vacation homes and private jets, at least from the family account (since he doesn't work, he doesn't actually make as much as them in total because they earn more on top of their allowances).

And the thing is, Shen Yuan genuinely just lives a lot more humbly. He likes people but what would he do with a vacation house? Anything really nice would probably require him to fly to get out there, and he gets sick as hell on planes. Living in the central city is also not great for him, because the air pollution is so bad. Having a whole house to himself would also be ridiculous. So he has a reasonable apartment, in a reasonable area, and he splurges every so often on purchases that make him happy and take-out food that he likes, and of course he pays a cleaning service to come in twice a week. Most people assume he's comfortably middle class and has some tech job he does from home, but he's been getting a lot more than he's been spending in his monthly allowances for years now, and the figures are big.

Enter into this environment author Airplane and his trash novels. Novels, multiple, because in this AU there's no PIDW, and instead after some alternate PIDW prototype got popular in the harem genre, Airplane decided to churn out a series of copy-paste shorter stories rather than recycling the same subplots in one massively long epic.

Shen Yuan of course discovers Airplane's writing and becomes as obsessed with it as ever, except this time he notices that if there are delays between new stories, they seem to clear up faster whenever he throws some cash at the problem. And also that the drops in Airplane's writing quality coincide with times when Shen Yuan was having health issues and not keeping up with his VIP purchases. So, he works out that Airplane's probably doing the writing for the money, and that when Peerless Cucumber isn't paying the most for it, Airplane starts listening to the other buffoons in the comment section more to try and entice them to pay his bills instead.

Peerless Cucumber leaves a comment on one of Airplane's latest stories that kicks off the two of them actually chatting, and Shen Yuan eventually gets to the point of offering to fund all Airplane's writing, in exchange for Airplane not doing his crap sellout stuff to appeal to other readers anymore. Airplane thinks he's joking or maybe mocking him. Shen Yuan asks how much it would cost. Airplane fires off a ridiculous number. Shen Yuan doesn't even blink and wires him the first payment. Then he gets annoyed because Airplane leaves him on read for a while, but that's because Airplane is staring at his account balance in shock.

Of course, it's Airplane who starts referring to Peerless Cucumber as his sugar daddy. Shen Yuan is just like "based on your sex scenes I don't think anyone would pay you for that" and Airplane's all "but you WOULD pay for my sex scenes ^_~" and Shen Yuan's like "technically I am actually paying you not to write that shit" and so on. Usual banter. The quality of Airplane's writing improves dramatically, a lot of his readership drops off but he does get new readers and gradually builds up an even bigger fanbase than before, and so on, it all goes pretty well. He eventually writes a few things that take off to the point of getting physical publications and international translations. Technically Airplane no longer needs Shen Yuan to pay all of his bills by that point but he's not going to tell Shen Yuan that! The contract's still good as long as he keeps writing!

Then one of Airplane's online acquaintances runs into some financial trouble and asks for help.

Liu Mingyan used to beta read for Airplane back when he wrote fanfiction (she was like thirteen, Airplane was unaware because internet and hey free beta), and it seems her family has hit a rough patch. She wants tips on how to go pro, but Airplane explains that it was extremely difficult and he mostly lucked out by finding a single wealthy backer. Mingyan wonders if the same guy would be interested in her writing, Airplane sadly thinks not because Mingyan exclusively writes kinky danmei erotica and Peerless Cucumber seems pretty firmly in the closet still and also generally prefers plotty and world-building heavy stuff.

But like, Airplane has definitely gotten a vibe off of Cucumber-bro, and Mingyan's gorgeous older brother does video streams of himself doing cool martial arts and swordsmanship stuff. So he asks her permission and when she gives it, he recommends Liu Qingge's videos to Shen Yuan, being sure to mention that the guy in question can't really afford to keep up with his hobbies and oh what a shame it would be if he had to stop making art like that.

Haha, Airplane, you're not subtle.

Even so, Shen Yuan watches the videos and immediately agrees that Liu Qingge is beauty in motion, and that it would be criminal to deprive the world of more videos of his sword. Swordsmanship! That is the, the art of, martial arts! Definitely. He clicks the donate button, reasoning out that he'll just send a donation about the size of his usual monthly payments to Airplane and call it his good deed for the day.

Liu Qingge is very confused by this new follower from nowhere who suddenly dumped a little over a month's rent into his account. One thing leads to another, with Mingyan and Airplane conspiring to try and get Shen Yuan as a permanent patron, and then Liu Qingge being let in on it. Except that Airplane keeps referring to Shen Yuan as his sugar daddy, and well... it's not like Liu Qingge doesn't ever get 'those' kinds of comments on his videos. At first he's embarrassed, then offended, then mortified that his own younger sister is apparently setting him up to make premium private videos for what he assumes is some old pervert who is going to want him to do untoward things.

However, their options are pretty bleak at the moment, and Liu Qingge worries that if he doesn't do this then Mingyan might. She even mentions something to the effect of having planned to offer herself, and only didn't because she wasn't this "sugar daddy" guy's type!

Teeth clenched, Liu Qingge asks Airplane stiltedly for advice on how to... appeal, to this wealthy benefactor.

In the end though it's not nearly as bad as Liu Qingge feared. He winds up doing more videos in costumes and cosplay, which ought to have been an untenable expense, but Peerless Cucumber always ends up covering the cost of whatever he invests in plus extra. Sometimes he sends Liu Qingge stuff with a request to wear it, but so far it's just been like, badass warrior-themed or historical costumes. Nothing overtly pervy. He does some LARPing, he makes enough to start doing horseback archery again, convinces some of his good-looking peers from various clubs to spar with him, and ultimately the most risque videos he ends up doing are the ones where he demonstrates how to put on certain kinds of gear. He still locks those ones behind paid subscribers only, mostly because he feels like he's doing something illicit now, even if he used to show more skin on his older videos any time he took his shirt off.

Peerless Cucumber doesn't leave creepy comments, either. In fact he seems genuinely nice and supportive, it's hard not to like him, and so even once his situation levels out Liu Qingge decides there's not really much need to stop making videos for him. (He maybe even gets a little giddy thrill over... well, sometimes he finds it all a bit... just when he thinks about Peerless Cucumber watching him demonstrate his physical prowess and finding that alone worth... ANYWAY--)

So that goes on for a while, before Yue Qi enters the scene.

Yue Qi is the childhood friend of one of Shen Yuan's older brothers (Shen bros!) and Shen Jiu owes him a big favor for something that he won't talk about. At least he won't talk to Shen Yuan about it. But Yue Qi is also not the type to ask for help, and Shen Jiu is very bad at offering it, so when Shen Jiu gets word that Yue Qi is having some difficulties making ends meet, he tells Shen Yuan to act as the middle man. Go offer Qi-ge money, he knows you're nice he'll just accept it, and then Shen Jiu will pay the actual bill.

Well it turns out that Yue Qi doesn't just accept it, of course he sees right through it, and gently but firmly tells Shen Yuan that he's not interested in burdening Shen Jiu further than he already has. Etc, etc, stoic stiff upper lips and no proper communication all around. Shen Yuan panics because it's not working and he's also genuinely worried about Yue Qi by now, so he tries to figure out how to make it compelling and basically blurts that, well, see, the thing is that sometimes he pays men to entertain him. You know. To like. Do things, for him. So. He could also pay Yue Qi? To do something for him?

Yue Qi gets the wrong idea entirely, and at first is like, oh, no, A'Yuan, you shouldn't be paying people for that! These things should just happen organically! But Shen Yuan is very adamant that he believes in compensating people for what they do for him, it's not like he can't afford to, and it gets awkward but Yue Qi is like well he does have health problems. It's perhaps difficult for him to meet people. So then he starts worrying about Shen Yuan and all these strange men he's apparently paying for "entertainment". Does his brother know about this?

No of course Shen Jiu doesn't know! He'd hate it, and Shen Yuan doesn't want to hear about how he's doing everything wrong with his life again!

Then Shen Yuan mentions that his prior house cleaning service up and quit on him (they didn't), and if Yue Qi would like to earn fair compensation he could just come over sometimes to help instead, and Shen Yuan would pay him just to tidy up and hang out for a few hours! Which Yue Qi thinks is a fantastic idea, actually, even if Shen Yuan is only doing this because of his brother, this will give Yue Qi a chance to keep an eye on him and his so-called entertainers. Even if he sort of... ends up also being one?

Shen Yuan keeps everything above board, though his apartment always seems perfectly clean and he overpays way too much (Shen Jiu is still footing this bill after all), and Yue Qi starts to think maybe he actually is being paid for intimacy. Of a sort that they're maybe still working up to? Shen Yuan usually has a very thin face after all. He's kind of got two minds about this prospect. On the one hand, he's got his situationship with Shen Jiu, so dating his brother would be absurd. But on the other hand, it's not actually dating, and he does like Shen Yuan, and maybe if they can be good company for each other then Yue Qi won't feel so depressed and Shen Yuan won't need to hire strange men so often.

Meanwhile it's come to Shen Yuan's attention, perhaps through an offhand comment he read online somewhere, that people who are struggling financially often also struggle to "treat themselves". Because even when they have enough money to be comfortable there's often the looming specter of deprivation, and etc, so he figures he should start buying some of his dependents more treats and things. Since they might not buy them for themselves? And also he's enjoying doing this but shhh no he isn't, it's a huge hassle, he's only doing it out of basic moral decency, etc.

So like, Airplane starts getting little things that he'd put on some public wish lists, clearly sent by Peerless Cucumber. And he tells Mingyan to make a list for Liu Qingge too, and sure enough, Liu Qingge (bewildered, slightly flustered) tries to figure out what he's supposed to do with an album from a band he likes and some high-end leather polish. Ultimately settles on playing the music and wearing his nicest leather in his next video. Yue Qi starts arriving at Shen Yuan's place to be plied with his favorite coffees and to have scented candles awkwardly foisted onto him (Shen Yuan does not know what Yue Qi likes in gifts) (he buys these presents himself they're not out of Shen Jiu's pocket).

So finally Shen Yuan's parents start to notice that he's been spending a lot more than usual, and start to worry that he's either been taken in by a scam artist or is secretly dating a gold digger or has developed a drug addiction or something. But asking things directly like normal people is basically illegal in the Shen family, so they decide to hire a private investigator.

Enter Luo Binghe, a young man of humble background who is struggling to make ends meet after the untimely death of his adoptive mother, and is using his P.I. job and his online cooking videos to help pay his way through school (scholarship student). Usually his cases are more like, cyberstalking someone to find out if they're cheating on their spouse, or helping someone planning a lawsuit accumulate evidence on their corrupt employer, or other things like that. When he gets the Shen Yuan case, the idea that the Shen family's son is paying for "company" is well within his list of probable answers.

Though this one is a little... peculiar?

Mostly because Binghe can't find evidence of Shen Yuan actually getting what he would, presumably, be paying for. At first Luo Binghe just goes through the online paper trails, using the info that the Shen parents give him to figure out that Shen Yuan is paying Airplane and Swordmaster Liu (*cough*) what seem to be exorbitant prices just for trashy fiction and cosplay videos. He assumes this is a cover, that someone's actually delivering drugs or going over for "private meetings" or at least actually sending dirty videos as well, but even when he pays for Liu Qingge's VIP access it's just tutorials and such. Neither of these guys are even on any of the sites that are more lenient towards hosting explicit content. Luo Binghe's aware that kinks aren't always obviously sexual, but people don't usually pay through the nose for the kind of content they can easily find for free all over the place, either.

He digs a little more but keeps coming up empty on evidence to clarify which of the many vices the Shen family's son is actually indulging in. Which is a problem because that's the information they're paying him to find out. Plus his curiosity kind of piques as he reads Shen Yuan's seemingly quite invested comments on Airplane's writing and Liu Qingge's videos, looking to see if there's any kind of clandestine code or pattern. But near as he can tell, whatever else Shen Yuan might be getting out of these arrangements, he does genuinely like the stories and videos too? Well. Sometimes. Sometimes he's actually scathingly vitriolic towards Airplane's writing.

Luo Binghe decides that surveilling Shen Yuan himself is probably the way to go. That gets more complicated in court cases, but since the Shen parents just wants to know what's going on and aren't planning on prosecuting their son for anything, it doesn't matter as much if Luo Binghe gets information in sneaky or underhanded ways.

So, Binghe uses the account he created to access Liu Qingge's videos to chat with Shen Yuan a few times, and then recommends his own cooking channel. Shen Yuan doesn't seem too interested in cooking, so Luo Binghe makes sure to include a video that has an image of himself in his recommendation, and then films a few new videos of himself cooking with his shirtsleeves rolled up to three quarters and a few more buttons than usual unbuttoned, adopting a more flirty persona than he typically does for his shows. He takes his cues from some of Liu Qingge's more popular videos for how to be enticing bait.

It takes a few videos, but eventually Shen Yuan comments. Luo Binghe latches onto the chance to start talking to him, playing up a persona of a vulnerable young man with little means who is trying hard to make it through school, etc, and sure enough Shen Yuan seems interested. Well, most predatory people like vulnerable targets, don't they?

However... Shen Yuan just sends him a chunk of money.

Luo Binghe is confused.

Isn't he supposed to ask for something or create some kind of expectation of repayment first? But, maybe this is his approach to handling new targets. Maybe he's just trying to lull Binghe into a false sense of complacency, before he starts indicating what he wants from all of this. Luo Binghe makes sure to move the money Shen Yuan sends him into a separate account, so that if the Shen parents get angry about it then he can return it as a gesture of good faith.

But Shen Yuan just keeps sending supportive comments and donations. Eventually he leaves a comment that alludes to how badly he'd like to taste Binghe's cooking, and Binghe is like finally, but when he implies that they could perhaps meet in person and Luo Binghe could thank him for his support by making him something, Shen Yuan backs off.

Things eventually progress to the point where Luo Binghe, who is a totally normal person treating this like a totally normal job still thank you very much, is basically camping out in the bushes in front of Shen Yuan's apartment building. At some point he conscripts the aid of his weird cousin (finding his birth family was how he got into this business initially), and then almost immediately regrets it because Shen Yuan helps get Zhuzhi Lang a job doing landscaping for his building.

Why would he want Zhuzhi Lang close but not Binghe? Binghe is much handsomer! He'd make an excellent target for seduction! >:(

Anyway eventually Yue Qi catches Luo Binghe lurking around like a creeper and is like, finally, I have caught one of these suspicious men, whilst Binghe is like oh so he does have a lover, well this guy sucks and is clearly not good enough for him, and they both try and chase one another off and Shen Yuan comes home to a heated passive-aggressive-politeness war being waged in front of his apartment. Eventually he realizes the misunderstanding and calls everyone together (zoom conference? in-person meet-up?) to clarify that he is not paying any of them for "special favors", that was just Airplane being deranged about his sense of humor, and then he has no idea what to do when the prevailing response seems to be disappointment.

[paperglader]

i just feel like someone should take one for the team and write the fanfic where miss homotron goes to dragonstone on foot, meets her situationship’s new lover, and immediately goes like blind with jealousy and fury (rhaenyra, as always when alicent’s near, looks and behaves like a very confused kicked puppy)

i just need homotron and saphotron to meet, so the real war can begin

[wordsinhaled]

something about how an edwardian boy who died in 1916 and a ska punk who died in 1989 are each other's perfect counterparts. something about how they crossed each other's timelines at just the right time to find one another in the most unlikely of ways and decided they were going to stay together forever, against all odds and despite every obstacle.

something about how they are from utterly different centuries and have such different histories, and they shouldn't be as compatible as they are. but they actively chose one another, and they are together so seamlessly and irreversibly now, such that gods and endless will not separate them.

something about how they both were born, and lived for sixteen years in their completely disparate eras, and died tragic, heartbreaking deaths; not knowing that they would find safety, care, love, belonging in their shared afterlife the likes of which they never were granted while living in their own years.

something about them subverting the classic tropes to create their own narrative, in a way that enhances the meaning and depth of the original tropes.

something about st. hilarion's, a place host to so much pain and abuse, was also the place where these two dead boys' paths were destined to converge. something about the attic of st. hilarion's being one of the first safe places either of them ever found, where their bond began to be formed. something about that bond, which transcends and overcomes life and death, pain, fear, loneliness, and trauma while acknowledging, respecting, and honoring the lasting effects of all of them.

something about the fact that they might never, ever have met except by the most far-fetched chance.

but they existed, out there for each other, even coming into the world seventy-three years apart.

something about soulmates existing across time...

[muzgozjeb]

[amielot]

Uno Reverse

Bonus:

@arialerendeair keeps giving me ideas to springboard off of XD

final image was referenced from Calvin and Hobbes :3

[ectoplasmer]

need to kiss him until we’re both silly and delirious and giggling, until we’re both grabbing at each other’s shoulders and sides and arms, until we’re both half hazardously stumbling our way backwards onto the couch in a heap of laughter just so we can be as close as possible and we’re clumsily bumping foreheads and noses. need to kiss him until he can’t stop smiling and until we’re both stupidly lovestruck and just clinging to each other

[grunkle-lover]

Pent up/thigh man/rough Ford (?)

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⚠️VERY NSFW MDNI!⚠️

■Not proof read bc idgaf■

♡Contains: chubby female reader, thigh kink, biting, pussy eating, overstim, kinda perv Ford, SEX!!!

♡minors, not my fault if you get traumatized♡

《Idk what happened, this ended up being like three times as long as I was planning... but oh well I guess, I think it got a little unhinged and lost a tiny bit of plot but oh well. Much more than half is just straight smut so who cares!》

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You and Ford have been together for about a year now, and he's very open with with you. Except when it came to his newfound fetish, your thighs. He couldn't take his eyes off them, all he wanted was to be crushed between them while eating you out.

Little did he know you've caught on to his staring, and have decided to silently tease him by wearing more clothes that expose your thighs.

Tonight was your one year anniversary and Ford was taking you out for a fancy dinner, you had splurged a little on a new dress yesterday that you knew he'd like.

pretty much this but with slits up both thighs and stop just before your underwear.

(mini skip)

You had just finished getting ready, and was waking down the stairs when you saw Ford standing by the front door in a suit with a matching red tie.

"Wow..." Ford looks breathless as he checks you out "you look gorgeous darling" he says unable to hide his smile.

"And you look as handsome as ever my love" you walk up to him, dusting off his shoulder and giving him a peck on the cheek.

Ford's cheeks get a dusting of pink at your actions "shall we?" He holds out his arm for you, and you take it smiling a at him as the two of you walk out to the car.

(After the date)

You had been teasing Ford throughout the date with small touches and mind games which were driving him crazy.

Once you both were inside he had locked the front door while you took off your heels. Suddenly you felt Ford's large hand on your waist pulling you backwards against his chest, and his warm breath on the back of your neck. He was leaving small kisses along your neck while his hands traveled lower to your thighs slowly hiking up your dress to expose your black lace underwear.

Ford had now turned to around so you were facing him as he slowly pushed you backwards, your lips connected with his he pressed your back against the counter.

"Do you know what you were doing to me back there?"

His voice is low and gravelly, his lips leaving small hickeys on your neck. You could feel his strained bulge against your thigh, you decide to tease some more to see how much he could take.

"Maybe, why don't you remind me"

You whisper into his ear nibbling slightly, while you grab his ass to keep him in place and rub your thigh against his growing bulge.

Ford responds immediately to your touch by stifling a moan and throwing you over his shoulder carrying you to the bedroom. He kicks the door open and practically throws you on the bed and starts undressing.

"Such a brat."

Ford mumbles as he crawls towards you now only in his boxers, he's sitting in between your thighs while he works the dress up your waist and pulls it over your head.

Ford whistles when your matching black lace underwear and bra. His hands start wandering up your waist to your upper back pulling you up into a sitting position on his lap. He groans quietly when you rub against his painfully hard dick and begins to unhook you bra while sucking on your neck.

"Need you to ride me"

Ford mumbles against your neck, his hands on your now exposed boob's pinching your nipples. You moan softly at the sensation, grinding down on his clothed bulge, your hands combing through his silver hair.

He moved so he was leaning against the head board and you were at the end of the bed. He had removed his boxers while he moved, his dick standing straight up and shaded red with a bead precum dripping down the base.

You're practically drooling at the sight as you slide your underwear down your thighs and off your legs.

"God you look sexy like that"

He blushes at your words not quite registering when you started to crawl towards him. You then place one leg on either side of his hips straddling him, and gently grabbing the base of his cock pumping slightly to spread the precum.

"Oh fuck baby, just like that"

Ford moans throwing his head back onto the pillow behind him, a six fingered hand gripping your waist. Once you've deemed him lubed up enough you lower your hips slightly and tease his overly sensitive tip through your wet folds.

Ford's eyes snap open at the feeling and a gasp escapes his lips which turns into a low drawn out moan, his hips bucking.

"Getting impatient are we?"

You tease. sucking on his neck before biting down, not hard enough to break the skin but just enough to leave a mark. Your kisses still down his neck to his chest eventually landing on his right nipple, circling it with your tongue.

The sound Ford emits is somewhere between a scream and a moan, while his hands are still on your waist. He finally lifts his head giving you a dirty look as if your playing unfair.

During all this you've been teasing his dick by rubbing your slick all over his lower half making sure he'll fit. Even after a year of being together and the countless times you've had sex, he's still just so thick that it's taken this long to be able to take him without much prep.

"Aww does is someone upset I know where youre sensitive?"

Your voice is almost mocking, but it turns him on anyway knowing that you can make him melt so quickly. Ford's getting even more needy now his hips bucking more often than before and his moans get whiner.

With a few more hickeys and some hand pumps you start to slide his tip inside your practically dripping hole. Both of you moan in sync at the feeling, and you slowly slide down farther till you have him fully stuffed inside you.

Ford's hands start wandering your body and over your stomach where there's a noticeable bulge in the shape of his dick. He presses on it causing you to moan loudly and arch your back, you're pussy squeezing around him.

"Ah my love you're so tight"

He manages to speak through his moans, his hips trying to buck into you but he's using all his strength to hold back as to not hurt you.

"If you don't move soon I'm not gonna be able to hold on much longer"

Ford's practically sweating from how much it's taking him to hold back from fucking into you like a mad man. His hands are helping your hips so tight you'll definitely be having dinner shaped bruises tomorrow.

You experimentally roll you hips causing you both to moan, and Ford's hips to buck into you which makes you gasp and grab his shoulders for support. You start a steady pase lifting about half way then gently letting back down, which was almost torture to Ford.

Despite liking slow sensual sex there are times where he's just so pent up he needs to release it somewhere, and why not into you?

Suddenly Ford loses his control and lifts you just to the tip before shoving you back down meeting you in the middle with a harsh thrust. His actions cause you to scream his name, nails digging into his shoulder muscles while all you can do now is accept your fate.

Tits bouncing and head resting in the crook of his neck, Ford fucks his rock hard dick into your pussy. Without warning Ford flips you onto your stomach and pulls your ass up into a doggy position. Holding your wrists above your head he lines back up and shoves his dick back into you hitting your deepest spot making you cum.

You're screaming his name as Ford fucks you through your orgasm, and keeps trusting with the same power. At this point you've been fucked stupid and all you can do is moan and try to move your hips back against his own.

After a few more minutes you notice Ford's thrusts start to get shallow and slower, which meant he was close to cumming. You do your best to squeeze around him and your actions don't go unnoticed, infact that was the last push he needed to spill his hot thick cum inside you.

"You did so good for me dear"

Ford says breathlessly, as he rolls you over to see your sweaty hickey covered body this sight alone makes him want to go again. He restrains himself by silently laying his head between your thighs leaving small kisses along them, and the occasional small hickey.

"Ford, what are you doing?"

Your voice is quiet and tired from your session earlier, however your hands make their way to his summer gray hair tugging slightly.

"Shh dear, let me take care of you"

Ford leaves a few more hickeys as he inches closer to your core, his hand wrapping around your hips again gently this time. Once he reaches his goal he licks a stripe from your entrance to you clit, the mixed taste of yours and his cum making him moan softly.

When he starts sucking your clit a shudder rips through your body, your pussy being overstimulated hightened your sensitivity to his touch. You start to squirm at his actions when he dips his tongue into your hole that's dripping your mixed cum.

"Taste so good"

Ford's mumbles against your pussy pulling you back to him when you try to wiggle away, he practically shoves his face into your pussy. He's now eating you out like you're his last meal and god do you love it, your hands are gripping his hair pulling him as close as possible.

The pleasure starts to build up getting closer to your orgasm, your legs start to close around Ford's head thighs pressing on either side of his head. His hands move from your waist to your thighs gripping and fondling them as he continues to eat, moaning into your sensitive pussy.

"Ford! Can't take anymore"

You practically scream as you cum on his face, your thighs having a death grip around his head. He doesn't really notice though, because he's too busy slurping up your fresh cum not caring of he suffocates between your thighs.

When your legs relax he lifts his head, his hands still on your thighs, his whole loose face is glistening with cum and saliva. He gives you a doped or face like he's gotten high of your pussy, leaning his face into your right thigh he sucks a small hickey.

"I've wanted to do that for so long my love"

He speaks like it wasn't already obvious he had some sort of fetish for your thighs. You laugh at his words smiling down at him, you squish his face with your thighs.

"Oh I know honey"

You let him go and let your legs fall flat along with the rest of your body.

"Let's get you cleaned up darlin"

(After he cleans you up)

(Aftercare king)

He had picked out your favorite pair of pajamas and made sure you wouldn't be sticky in the morning. You both were now cuddled up with each other, you being the little spoon and Ford being the big spoon, you had said your goodnights and drifted off to sleep.

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[bauhin]

the Liu siblings have no sense of social propriety because of pretty privilege

[zurka-durka]

they got lost

[arrowheadedbitch]

Konner runs into Tim's room and starts yelling at him for committing atrocities and "how could you do this! What happened to your code! There were civilians there! I thought I knew you!" Yknow, the works. And Tim's like

What are you talking about

And Conner gets all angrier and he's yelling at tim and stuff

And then tim just kinda sighs and pulls a little whiteboard out of his desk that has "Days since an evil version of myself has fucked shit up" or something like that and he erases the number under and puts 0 and is just like "Okay, let's go" super unenthusiastically . He sounds so tired and done with it.

[blue-mood-blue]

How to care for your beloved in the case of venom/infection

DO apply a temporary tourniquet to your beloved to isolate the venom

DO suck the excess venom from your beloved’s wound

DO acquire an unsullied herb that has not been fertilized by the previously-human-face taunting you from the dirt and apply to your beloved’s wound remove the remaining venom

DON’T chase your beloved

DON’T corner your beloved in an alley

DON’T force your blood into your beloved’s mouth as both a cure for infection and a tracking device

[sunderwight]

I love thinking about how a Shen Yuan reveal would go from Luo Binghe's perspective, maybe even especially in cases where Binghe doesn't actually get to see Shen Yuan's world or understand it very well.

Imagine finding out that your husband is some kind of interdimensional alien spirit/angel who saw your fate and got so upset about it that he died. Then he came to your world, even though he didn't know that was possible, but since it was he immediately set about making your life less shitty and trying to change your fate. Except he couldn't change all of your fate because some kind of godlike being, the same one that brought him here, didn't want to let him. He's haunted by the fact that he couldn't figure out better ways to help you. He never expected any of his regard to be reciprocated, either, in fact he assumed you'd hate him. You never had to convince him to love you or respect you. He has always loved and respected you. There's basically nothing you can do to lose that love and respect either, because the first version of you that he even knew about was your edgelord comphet idiot mirror universe counterpart.

The bar has been at the earth's crust this entire time.

The fluffy parts of this reveal are obviously good, but I also think Luo Binghe deserves to know just how fully terrible his husband's judgment is. Also that Shizun has been dying for him since before they even met.

I think it'd be fun how often that would probably keep him awake at night, quietly trying not to have a crisis over the fact that his husband has made an honest to god habit of dying for him.

[h0e-y]

I am stupid and horny. Stupid horny if you will.

[morethanwonderful]

Which MXTX Character Would Be Most Insufferable Online?

Full Bracket

(Bonus match theme: Utterly incapable of posting normally about the main character)

[muzgozjeb]