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salubriwrites-blog · 3 months ago

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A Weird Dive into my favorite ships

This started as an answer to an anonymous question but... it grew a little bit. I have no forward except to please drink water today! Love you!!!!

I'm actually pretty new still to writing fanfiction. I've been an avid writer since I was 10 and was even working on getting my own book published. From there I springboarded into TTRPG design where I wrote world building, lore, and characters for IPs like Call of Cthulhu and Vampire: The Masquerade. I only really just got into writing *fan fiction* in the last 2 years.

My first fanfic/ship was actually pretty silly. I was on the Encanto hype train when that movie first came out (can you believe its been 3 years???) and I loved, loved, loved Bruno Madrigal. He was the traumatized, distraught uncle living in the walls of Casita trying to fix the internal damage that came from Abuela's treatment of La Familia. His intentions were pure, and he obviously had gone through a lot to drive him to the point where we see him in the story. This was the first branch I would hit falling down the "I can fix them" tree.

The story is cute and has a happy ending, but as we all know in the real world, unlearning toxic behavior and overcoming life long trauma takes time. So I wrote a BrunoxOC story about it. I ended up orphaning it because I veered the story off in a direction I didn't like because the group I was part of were heavily influencing my creative choices. Boo, hiss I know, but I was still pretty new within the fanfiction genre so I buckled.

Moving on!

My second fiction that I put a lot more love into - sorta I may go back and rewrite parts of it now - was my YorickxOC fiction.

Yorick was my first ever League of Legends love. Fucking love that haunted beef cake. The Ruined Event did him dirty, the Ruined King Game did him dirty, and the book probably did him dirty too (I haven't read it). My Gravekeeper needs ALL THE LOVE because he is absolutely going through it in sheer solitude (though the Illaoi story where he goes to help destroy Viego's amulet gave me hope that now he gets visitors sometime on the island).

Remember Yorick Mori: Before the Ruination This was my first completed and quite hefty fiction weighing in at 153k words: it followed his story where he starts out on a lonely little fishing island called Portia (it doesn't have a name in Lore). He ends up on a slightly busier island that is situated off the coast of Helia (Blessed Isles capitol) and begins his journey to understand why he can communicate with the Dead. He meets a cast of charming monks that want to both see him thrive and maintain status quo. He even meets the owner of the bakery that barters with the Order of Dusk - whom he naturally falls in love with immediately. Rosalie McKahn is not a self insert. I don't make self inserts when I write OCs because I hold myself to a weird standard - also I don't see myself being compatible with most of these characters. Would I still like them to do unspeakable things to me? Oh shit yes. But from a story standpoint, I don't do self inserts. So Rosalie was not one of those. The story follows a young Yorick through his years of servitude to the Order of Dusk, uncovering dark secrets, finding confidence to become the man that he will need to be when the Ruination comes. Rosalie was not the only person who helped to build Yorick up in this story, but their love is what gives him the strength to keep fighting when the rest of it was bleak. This love eventually passes on to the Maiden of the Mist in the epilogue I have yet to write ^^;.

Then we got into the Heartsteel arc, and this was where I really found my love for the "I can fix them" dynamics. I have no shame in saying that I wrote all of "Making of Paranoia: Off Script" in a week's time while the music video played on a loop on my second monitor. I'm just not. That was where the neurons wanted me to go, and off I fucking went. I knew I liked Aphelios when he first debuted in League, but I was scared of him because he's an ADC with 5 guns. Skill Expression was not something I was confident enough in to pursue that character. But he was hot! He ha a backstory that excited me and had a lot of potential. I really wanted to explore Aphelios' dynamic with his sister and the Lunari elders - pigeon holing him into being a weapon of faith only.

I also knew I liked Yone, but was fearful of him for similar reasons. In the end I just nutted up, typed /mute all in game chat, and hit my head against the wall until I got M7 on Yone. His story is by far my favorite of all the League characters (rivaling Yorick's, of course). A man who spent his whole, short life trying to save someone who he thought was in danger of falling off the path of virtue? Only to come back and KEEP DOING IT but with extra steps??? WAITER ANOTHER PLEASE.

But I didn't really anticipate putting these two characters together within the canon sense. I didn't see a way that they could meet (though one of my friends has since written a beautiful fiction where it shows how they do meet, and how they do connect! https://archiveofourown.org/works/52384363/chapters/132517315 )

BUT THEN. BUT THEEEEN.

I was watching Paranoia for the 69th time that day and I saw THIS VERY SPECIFIC CLIP where the only person who looked the most remote bit of concern for Aphelios' well being was YONE. Boom, Off Script was born.

Off Script was definitely the first FanFiction where I really jumped into my current dynamic. It follows after the filming of that day, cut short after Aphelios fell into a water tank with one of the drones. Yone is going to check on him, and Aphelios is lamenting that no one else has come to see if he's alright. Not even his boyfriend, Sett.

This infuriates Yone because that's just not good boyfriend behavior, and he promises Aphelios that - should he be given the chance - Yone would treat him 10x better than Sett has, is, or ever will.

Also who wouldn't want to be treated like a princess by this specimen? Let's not fool ourselves. Anyway - Paranoia gave me a chance to explore this dynamic in a new way. Yone had issues of his own - I had to find a way to implement his Arzakana nature into a modern AU so I opted for "intrusive thoughts" that encouraged him to do some generally not nice things. In Yone's backstory he was a toxic person, used people up, whored his way through most of his opportunities, and was a bad brother to Yasuo. Yone initially followed Yasuo into the music making industry because he wanted to help his baby brother succeed - and he didn't really know what he wanted to do with his own life. Yone then got it into his head that maybe he and his brother could make music TOGETHER. Yasuo didn't want that because True Damage was doing it's own thing and - for just once in his life - he wanted something that only he had made, not with his older brother. Yone takes his poorly, and being the toxic brother that he is, makes a scene at an industry party and gets booted out. Yasuo cuts him out of his life. On his drunken, staggering tirade through the streets of Valoran City, Yone gets into an accident. He dies. But then suddenly gets resuscitated! I'm not a doctor so I just literally chalk it up to a freak accident that Yone comes back. While Yone believes that it's a second chance. He wakes up in the coroner's office in a cooler, and bangs and screams at the door the whole night until the coroner ME comes in the next morning to fetch the John Doe. Yone doesn't know who he is anymore, but he knows he can't be the asshole now cause that's what got him killed. So he spends time reflecting, soul searching. He knows he still loves making music, and though he gets a desk job and lives this semi-stable life, he still dreams of making music.

Enter Heartsteel.

Aphelios' twin sister is already a multi-platinum artist who runs her own record label - Lunari Studios. Aphelios is on the other side of the story - he's just kind of following Alune around and standing back as she shines. He knows he's talented - he knows a million instruments and helps Alune with her production, but he doesn't think that he could do it all by himself. When he and Sett start dating, it's more of the same. Sett is big and loud, people are drawn to him and his style, and it gives Aphelios someone to latch onto that isn't his sister for once. In Off Script, Aphelios' fate would have been the silent lyricist and musician for the band. He would have told himself that he was happy with standing back.

Except after the events of the music video, Yone won't let him. Yone encourages him to sing, to write bolder lyrics, to voice his opinion. Yone helps Aphelios find confidence, and in return Aphelios lets Yone help him. All Yone really ever wants in any AU is to help, but helpful people can be toxic too. Aphelios allows Yone to do that, but with his own confidence can help draw boundaries on when Yone is being too supportive, or investing too much of his own energy. In the Heartsteel AU I wrote, they are happy together ^^

I finished Off Script around the time of Worlds 2023. Which was when they announced my Babygirl!

And boy what a journey THIS CHARACTER HAS BEEN.

Hwei has it all. The trauma, the growth, the setbacks, the hips, the style, the potential. Surprisingly though - I am not a huge fan of the JhinHwei ship. Maybe cause I see too much of myself and who I used to be in its dynamic. I've been both of those characters in my past relationships, but this isn't the place for that kind of deep dive.

Hwei is neat because he introduced a new idea to my ship dynamic. He's not broken, just lost. He's looking for himself and every person he meets is just a stepping stone on his journey to peace of mind.

I wouldn't call Hwei self assured, because he doesn't know who he wants or what he wants to be, but he knows he has all the tools to reach that end. I like shipping him with multiple characters with Hwei in different stages of his self-realization because he is an inspiring character. He can terrify and and awe in the same breath, depending on which version of him we're visiting.

For this last one we're departing League completely.

I got into HSR after Genshin got a little stale for me. Also I got a fancy new phone that I could actually play Hoyo games on, and HSR is the best for mobile play.

I got into HSR in the middle of the Penacony story, but my friends warned me that I'd love Aventurine when I met him. I spoiled myself by looking at pictures of him and OOH BABY

You can fit so much trauma in this baby.

Aventurine is another fun one because yes - he has a tragic fucking story and I would single handedly help him repopulate Sigonia if given the opportunity. But once again, Teeeechnically not broken.?? He has ghosts he faces throughout the story, and must address each aspect of himself before crossing the river, but by the time he's come out, I like to think he's at peace with who he had to become in order to survive. From fighting in pits, murdering his former owner, tricking the IPC, I don't think Kakavasha would have done any of that stuff. Aventurine, on the other hand-

It's a common theme when you are in survival mode because of trauma. Is he fully cured? Fuck no, but will he continue to strive to be the kind of person he wished would have saved him when he was a kid? Fuck yes.

Which is why we need to impregnate him.

My friends warned me I'd love Blade. I was determined to not, but then I went through the Jingliu story and learned about the High Cloud Quintet and it was over.

I just think this guy's hot. I know a lot of people ship him with Dan Feng and Jing Yuan (it's pretty hot, ngl), but I kinda like Blade/Kafka or Blade/Stelle. The Kafka angle is not so much romantic as it is a mutual understanding that they are both going down this journey together and it can get lonely sometime. So more convenience than romance.

I'm working on a Blade/Stelle story right now where - Best I Am, Prey You Become. It explores Stelle abandoning the trailblaze to join the Stellaron Hunters, and as part of her initiation Blade if voluntold by Kafka to train her. Their relationship is mentor/student and she is obviously hot for him, but Blade is an immortal, tired old man who doesn't have time for that. Except Elio has other plans, as Blade's script reaches a conclusion - he finds something worth dying for. When it comes to HSR Fanfictions I take a lot more creative liberty because I didn't follow the lore to the letter. Also I love world building so!!!! I also built Sigonia-IV for that story, I just gotta get the neurons to activate x.x

#favorite ships #fanfic #league of legends #lukai hwei #hwei #yone league of legends #heartsteel #aphelios league of legends #bruno madrigal #honkai star rail #hsr aventurine #hsr blade #trauma recovery #complex ptsd #blog #creative writing #Yorick lol

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magpies-gold · 1 year ago

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Alpha Base - Elliot I've been very fascinated with my book's villains for the last couple of months, and mostly that's because they (especially Heinrich) are kind of new! Every attempt I'd made to write Alpha Base in the past had been one where I just didn't have a lot of great insight into the bad guys and I was kind of weakly making them up as I went along. This year they all kind of clarified and brought the missing half of the plot with them, so I've been a bit excited about them.

But! There are other characters who I've long ago, years ago, fleshed out, and yet I never did nail down the looks for them. First up, my protagonist, Elliot. I've drawn her before, but I was never entirely happy with her look and I've changed it a few times. This here is the appearance I went with in a full illustration I did earlier this year featuring her and one of her adopted dads in the Comm. Station (which also happens to be her home). I think this one finally feels right. I think I'll stick with it.

As for where she fits into the story, first I really have to actually explain the premise of the world. I'm sure I've mentioned it in past posts and commentary, but once more with feeling: Alpha Base is a very unique location. It was once a active military outpost during an interstellar war far from Earth, but became trapped in a bubble by an alien weapon that misfired: that weapon should have killed everyone in the base, but instead it failed to trigger the fatal blow and instead just cut the population of the base off from everything outside, leaving them trapped. There's no way in to Alpha Base and no way out. There are no stars, no moon, no sun. It's an absolute closed system and the denizens have been eking out an existence for somewhere in the range of a century by the time our story starts. They've become absolute masters of recycling and reusing what they have, but there's only so far that that can take them. Their time is limited. The environment is hazardous: the atmosphere isn't breathable without oxygen support (hence the masks), background beta radiation is higher than what's comfortable and safe (hence the protective clothing), and over time, the combination of that and the hopelessness of their situation takes a toll. The population's been on a decline for decades, what technology they have is down to basics and reaching the end of its serviceable life even with the rather extraordinary creativity that they put into repairing it all. Within their lifetimes, something is just bound to give and turn the whole place from barely habitable into a forgotten graveyard.

Now, there used to be more efforts to escape back in the beginning, but none came close to being successful. Over time, it became more practical to instead play the waiting game, try to live as long as possible, and hope for rescue instead. The line of reasoning employed by those in charge is that the escape attempts of the past wasted valuable resources and shortened the base's lifespan as a whole, so they had to be ended. Of course, the real reasoning is more nuanced and goes deeper than that. Some of it's fatalistically philosophical: some don't believe that they should ever escape just on principal. Alpha Base is home, the outside world isn't, and those from Alpha Base are too fundamentally different to integrate into outside society (if there is an outside society; they have no indication of who won the war or if the war even ever ended). Some of it's political: a handful in Alpha Base have a vested interest in maintaining the status quo, because within the base there's a power and control structure that would break down if people could just leave. At any rate, escape is discouraged.

But, with the hastening breakdown of their society, interest in escape has begun to creep back in. A rebellion of sorts, an underground, sprang up - one based on the idea that if they were all doomed anyway, why not go out swinging? Why not try again to break down the wall and find freedom? What do they really have to lose?

Among the most infamous of those rebels were Elliot's parents. A lot of the details of what happened when she was small are kept from her, but she knows the story that everyone knows: that her parents died attempting to organize an effort to crack the shell. They infiltrated HQ, betrayed Alpha Base Command, found and stole top secret information that gave them some hope in hell of success, and that that information, whatever it entails, is still out there in the hands of the rebel underground, an underground that Heinrich, particularly, has been hunting down for twenty years.

After her parents' deaths, Elliot was raised by her uncle, Jacob, who, despite being the brother of a rebel, largely escapes scrutiny by being extremely useful. He's a masterful tinkerer and repairman, a collector of junk that he spends his days rebuilding, repairing, repurposing and distributing back into the population. He loves to help, loves to fix, and never hesitates with his hospitality. Likewise, his husband, Herrat (Herratt? I can't decide if it's got two t's or one and I keep switching between), holds a position of some prestige in the base as the Communications Master - acting in a practical fashion as a central distribution hub for important official communications to the base and, in a more symbolic gesture, as the eyes and ears of the base looking outward, monitoring the airwaves for any sign that the Earth Forces in the universe beyond are attempting to contact them. Some (like Paul, for example) think that that latter duty is absolutely pointless and nothing more than sentimental. Others believe that there is no more important job: that continuing to keep an ear tuned to the outside is the hope that keeps the base alive. Elliot is learning from both of them, and it keeps her curious. She has her uncle Jacob's love of tinkering and fixing, and Herrat's sense of duty and care towards others. She loves to read, she loves to learn, she loves to help, and she's well-loved by the vast majority of people in the tiny little town that is her home.

But she's still the daughter of rebels, raised by the brother of a rebel and by a man who embodies the kind of hope that's almost taboo.

While she, herself, has never done anything to cause trouble, it means that she and her family are still watched carefully, particularly by Heinrich. Her parents' betrayal of the base is something that Heinrich especially took very, very personally, for reasons that she's never been entirely sure of. Ever since she was three years old, he's been a constant in her life, keeping tabs on her family and her and on how she's grown up. It always seems like he's watching for someone among them to slip up and admit to some crucial information that he needs to finish his crusade. But that information, to her knowledge, doesn't exist.

She's never been interested in causing trouble and doesn't know of any rebel connections in her immediate family, and so despite the threat, Heinrich has never been very scary to her like he is to the rest of the base. To them he's practically the bogey man, the one you tell scary stories about late at night. To her he's like the weird uncle who she's kind of fond of. In a textbook way she knows that he could be dangerous to her and her family, and she does watch what she says around him, but in the day-to-day they get along fairly well. She likes books and he'll bring her books. She thinks the history of the base and long ago Earth are fascinating, and he keeps the key to the HQ Archives and can vet what information she gets her hands on, so he shows her harmless things.

It's an uneasy peace that always has the threat of shattering, and which the rest of the base keeps an eye on, but for most of her life it's been comfortable enough.

And then comes the event that became known as the first skyquake, a phenomenon that marks the beginning of the end for Alpha Base, and everything in Elliot's life rapidly starts to change.

#Alpha Base #Elliot #character design #the plot premise finally makes an appearance!#my art

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with-my-murder-flute · 2 years ago

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I have this hideous feeling Jod's going to try to pull off a redemption arc and fix the universe, "do it right" and "put this first-draft dream of [his] to bed", and while it wouldn't be a good thing, it would be impressive by most standards

Spoilers up to Nona the Ninth

As I understand it, his original plan was to put ten billion people in cryo suspension and just basically halt all human activity on the Earth to halt human-created pollution, and then revive them when the planet had stabilized environmentally

What if he still plans to do that? What if he hasn't just been pursuing symbolic revenge, but stockpiling enough thanergy in the River to resurrect the ten billion?

He seems absolutely warped enough to think that killing all the (non-House) humans in the universe is totally okay if he goes back and undoes his big original oops. People aren't individuals with inherent worth and value! They're interchangeable markers whose worth is determined by group affiliation.

He also seems out of touch with life's realities to think that he totally could revive ten billion people and they'd have totally great lives and everything would go back to normal! Who cares if there isn't any infrastructure anymore to house or feed all of them? Something something, they'll make do! Who doesn't want to live in a post-apocalyptic world?

It might have literally taken ten thousand years to build up enough thanergy to revive them all. Maybe the River is where it all goes, which is why necromancers can only use it for a few minutes before it's gone? Maybe the bodies in the River all went to feed the rebuilding of the Tower?

But while Alecto's been asleep... could the Earth have grown a new soul to replace her? Even a moon with scant microbial life is complex enough to have a soul, and the First House's vegetation and seafood are testament to working ecosystems. Is that why, in Varun's words, "he left them too long"?

What I would hate most (which might still be a very good story) is if some of his plan turned out to be good enough that, even if he's the worst person in the universe, our heroes are forced to help instead of opposing him and thwarting his plans. Although I also want him to be destroyed and thwarted in as many ways possible

It's just, I think that's what Ianthe did, in saving him. It was quite likely 100% to keep the Dominicus system alive and to keep the River intact. She sure doesn't seem to have done it out of personal affection for him; he's a tool to maintain the status quo.

#the locked tomb #the locked tomb spoilers #ntn spoilers

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independentzaun · 2 years ago

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Ages and memory

So me being interested in small details went looking at ages, and noticed a few things.

Silco is roughly four years (give or take a year in either direction) younger then Vander. Sevika is about 5 years younger than Silco so nine years younger than Vander. Most of the chem barons besides from Renni are either noticeably younger than Silco (or in the case of Chross much older), and Marcus is about ten years younger. Why does this matter?…

I don’t think most people currently operating in Zaun or Piltover remember how things used to be anymore and those that do have enough money and power built up to have a vested interest in maintaining the status quo. I don’t think Silco has any true peers he works with in terms of experience, age, personal convictions, and the like. Whatever connection Renni may have used to have with things she’s obviously lost after being more concerned with profits, and throwing in her lot with Finn. Sevika probably is one of the few people still operating that fought in the same conflicts that Vander did (besides from Silco of course), and Silco finds himself moving more and move into the status of let’s call it… the old guard, the OG, the “old man” who built things but now others want him gone.

In my opinion it says a lot that Finn says “I thought now here’s a man who knows how to run an enterprise, but time’s lapped you old man” while Silco has always talked about the Free Nation of Zaun. Finn is a good fifteen years younger than Silco. Finn is used to relative peace with Vander, and then business and profit with Silco. The idea of a Free Nation isn’t there for the simple reason Finn has the power and money he wants. What does he care about the others? Meanwhile Silco, hates him and the other chem-barons. There’s a reason he deliberately says “Now I’m forced to share the air with parasites like you who leech off their legacies.”

Silco respects the brothers and sisters of Zaun, and the people he fought alongside with back in the day. He knows Zaun wouldn’t be anything without their struggle, and that Finn and the others wouldn’t have the power or money or influence they have without that struggle. Silco doesn’t know their history he lived it… and he’s one of the last people who truly knows, remembers, and lived what happened. Silco lives, and breathes Zaun while being forced to share the air and power… with parasites who have no true understanding of what’s important and who leech off of the struggles of those who came before.

It makes me wonder if Silco had a blind spot. The blind spot being how much Zaun changed under Vander because of that relative peace, and how the younger generation didn’t have the same drive and need for freedom so long as they had some form of prosperity for themselves. Maybe his blind spot led him to pick chem-barons who had a drive to succeed yes, but not to drive things forward the way Silco needed because they just don’t. See. The. Need.

How alone and frustrated does Silco feel with so many others having left The Cause, or never having been in it and here he is trying to still direct things so that Zaun can ultimately be free and have the opportunity the daughters and sons of Zaun deserve?

#silcodrabbles #justsilcothings #justzaunthings #I'm not in a good mood today tbh so probably wont be doing much but have this random bit of thought

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ardathksheyna · 11 months ago

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South Minneapolis in a nut-shell.

I miss South Minneapolis.

That picture is 100% mine. I took it while sitting in my laser blue straight-piped '06 Monte Carlo (it had the 3.9L V6) at the light at 2nd Avenue & East 36th Street—or maybe it was 35th? I can't remember which intersection but I know I was on my way to work because I frequently took 35W to the 3rd Street exit in the morning.

Fuck, I miss those days. This was a few weeks before my life to went to hell in a hand-basket. I think looking back at those times, the deal with ADHD brains not developing fully until mid 30s makes a lot of sense.

Welcome to Hell

That "hell in a hand-basket" deal was me realizing that the status quo of my life as it had been then could not continue. I was 38 years old, yet still thought of myself as 17 and thus still a kid—DESPITE having put myself through school and maintaining a career as a software engineer.

That status quo that I was talking about? Well, I made a decision in my early 20s that I now realize I did not have the adult experience necessary to make.

Long story short, I cosigned a mortgage with my father on a house in South Minneapolis—on Nicollet Avenue roughly a mile south of That Fucking K-Mart.

That was the biggest fuckup of my adult life. What it came down to is that I had to essentially commit financial seppuku to break that status quo.

The reason why I had to take such drastic lengths? Despite promises when we bought the house, dad decided that he didn't want to sell even if I moved out. If I moved in with my boyfriend, I was still on the hook for the mortgage—which meant that there would be no way for my boyfriend and I to build our own life.

What ended up happening was a lot of bad feeling and fighting back and forth not only between my dad and I, but my sisters as well. I was told that it was selfish of me to want to move out without providing for dad first.

When I repeated that line to my mostly male friends—here was their take: your father is a whole grown-ass man. He's able-bodied, and can fucking take care of himself.

After the last fight, I packed up my important shit, got in my car and left. On the drive to Forest Lake, I knew then that I was starting the rest of my life.

Looking back on it, I think if it hadn't been for both my friends and my boyfriend, I probably never would have had the courage to do what I did.

I realize now that all I had been doing up until that point was waiting for my family's permission to live my life and that is not a way to live at all.

The lesson learned from this is one that I'll pass on to anyone under the age of 30 being pressured by their parents to cosign loans for them.

Don't do it.

No, seriously.

Do not do it.

Why? You have no idea where your life is going, or who you'll meet and possibly want to spend the rest of your life with. Maybe you'll want kids, maybe you'll want to travel. You just never know.

The saga of my old pad in South Minneapolis is a long and drawn out one so I'll keep it short.

But I will say this. It does have a happy ending.

#southside #minneapolis #twin cities #life #regret #mistakes were made #mistakes were corrected

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young-dumb-and-vaccinated · 3 years ago

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The Sommelier (Hannigram x Female!Reader) pt. 15

Hannibal gives y/n an idea and y/n negotiates.

@viviace @deadman-inc-bikeshop @dovahdokren

Trigger warnings: graphic descriptions of violence

Aftercare was Hannibal's favorite part of the evening. He loved to spend long, indulgent hours pampering his darlings. But usually, there was only one. And that was Will. And Hannibal's clawfoot bathtub, although beautiful, was not big enough for both of you at the same time. Meaning, you had to take turns.

You and Will argued back and forth about who was in more desperate need of aftercare; each advocating for the other, of course. That was Hannibal's fault, really. He should have known better than to ask you to make a decision.

Hannibal emerged from the bathroom, sleeves rolled up and arms soaked to the elbow. "Who is first?"

Before you could speak, Will shoved you forward. "She is."

Hannibal knew better than to let the argument go on, and so did you. You followed him into the bathroom, the smell of lavender bath salts filling the air.

He removed your fluffy robe and watched you step into the warm bath. The water was just hot enough to soothe the aches in your muscles. Hannibal took his seat at the end of the tub where you rested your head. You leaned back and submerged your whole body.

“You have such soft hair.” Hannibal said, pouring a bit of expensive-smelling shampoo in his palm.

“Thanks, I use fabric softener and tumble dry it on low heat.” You answered.

“You have a hard time accepting compliments, don’t you?” He probed, beginning to lather the shampoo into your hair. “Between that and the self-deprecation, I’d say you suffer from low self-esteem.”

You felt yourself melting into him. The hypnotic motions of his hands chipped away at your defenses. “Is that really that surprising?”

“For such an intelligent, sophisticated young beauty?” Hannibal chuckled. “I am surprised you don’t understand your worth.”

“If it makes you feel any better,” You offered. “The fact that a psychotic cokehead fundamentalist Christian cult leader wants me dead tells me I’m doing something right.”

“You are a force of nature, my indulgence.” Hannibal assured you, still massaging your head. “But you don’t need me to tell you that. You already know your power.”

That got you thinking. Would it be so bad to just find a hunting rifle and blow Chase Mulvaney’s head off? What was stopping you? It certainly wasn’t your conscious. All your remaining moral fiber had been ripped to shreds over the course of the last month.

“Tell me something about yourself, Hannibal.” You said, leaning back.

“What would you like to know?” He asked, retracting his hands. He cupped his hands in the water and poured some over your hair.

“Do you ever think about morality?” You said, bluntly.

The question pleasantly surprised him. “Quite a bit, actually. I like to think of myself as a student of philosophy, which deals heavily with the subject of ethics, human behavior, and yes, morality.”

“Do you believe morality is subjective?” you tilted your head.

“There’s not a doubt in my mind about it.” Hannibal smiled. “Those who think otherwise usually exemplify some of the best arguments for subjective morality.”

“Religious nuts like Chase Mulvaney.” You said. “He and millions of others believe in objective morality, but can’t even keep it consistent among themselves.”

“Darling,” Hannibal whispered. “You don’t have to wait for aftercare to talk philosophy with me. I would be happy to do so anytime.”

You spent a half hour in the bath, Hannibal stroking, kissing and cuddling you. As much as you wanted to enjoy the affection, your mind was elsewhere. Perhaps it was just a hyperfixation, or post-multiple-orgasm clarity, but the only thought in your head was that Chase Mulvaney had to die.

Your train of thought was chugging along smoothly until it was derailed by the violent buzzing of your phone against the tile floor. You leaned over the side of the tub, trying to make out the contact name from across the room.

Hannibal dried his hands on a nearby towel and picked the phone up from the ground.

“Who is it?” You asked.

“This number is logged into your phone as just a picture of a...red demon?” Hannibal answered.

“Oh, yeah.” You dropped your head. “I’ll call her back, just let it ring out.”

“Who’s the demon?” Hannibal chuckled.

You stepped out of the bathtub and reached for a towel. “Just somebody I know from work. Probably calling about covering a shift or something.”

“Would that be the same person who believed I was the devil?” Hannibal raised an eyebrow, watching you wrap the towel around yourself.

You were about to say yes, but caught yourself. “No. Just some lady I work with who always refused to share her tips with the buses. Super entitled, total pain in the ass. I’ve been looking for an excuse to tell her off.”

“Well, we can’t keep you from that, now can we.” Hannibal cupped your cheek in his hand and looked at your face admiringly. “There should be a clean nightgown for you on the bed. Please tell Will I’ll be ready for him in a couple minutes.”

“Wow, you really did think of everything.” You rocked back on your heels and swung to your tip toes to give him a kiss on the cheek. “I’ll let him know.”

He kissed you back. “Thank you, my indulgence.”

“Just one more thing.” You stopped in the threshold. “Could I please use your computer?”

“I don’t see why not.” Hannibal looked up from the quickly draining tub. “By all means, what’s mine is yours.”

You smiled and blew him a kiss before absconding into the bedroom.

The nightgown he’d laid out for you had far more ruffles and lace than you’d consider appropriate for sleepwear, but it was comfortable and fit you well.

You passed the message along to Will, but hurriedly. You were in a rush to be alone. You had some business to attend to.

You sat at Hannibal's desk, turned on his lamp and logged into your google drive on his computer. While you waited for the content to fully load, you scrolled through your contacts. When you found the demon, you pressed the green dial button.

It didn't take her long to pick up. "[F/N]! Finally, I've been trying to call you all night."

"Yeah, I know." You rolled your eyes. "Some of us have lives to live. Not that you'd know anything about that."

"No need to be snippy." She scolded. "I have an offer for you."

"If it doesn't involve a portion of ad revenue, I'm not interested." You shook your head. "I'm not settling for a flat fee while you make the real money off my experience. My goddamn trauma."

"Sounds like we woke up and chose bitchy today." She teased. "You're not even going to hear me out?"

"Freddie," you began, pulling up a document on the computer. "I happen to have a four-page, comprehensive statement of what happened that night right here. Half of it was cut out for the FBI report."

You could practically hear Freddie drooling already. "And?"

"I won't accept anything under $1200 for it." You finished. "Or 30% of all ad revenue on this article."

"That's not fair." She protested. "Best I can do is $750."

"You made ten times that off my first article." You leaned back in the chair. "Don't try to lowball me, Lounds, I can do this all night."

"Since when were you the assertive type?" She asked, deflecting the conversation.

"Remember when you told me my fifteen minutes of fame was running out and you were my only option to get my story out there?" You recalled.

"At the time, I was right." Freddie contested.

"That was before Chase went from a cokehead to a domestic terrorist." You said. "Now I actually can take it to a more reputable outlet."

"But here you are anyway." She said. "Extorting a small, woman-owned independent news site just for the hell of it. I've got bills to pay, y'know."

"With gaslighting like that, I'm sure they're astronomical." You rolled your eyes. Sighing, you propped your knees against the desk. "Look, I don't hate you, Freddie."

"I don't hate you either." She agreed. "I thought trashing each other was just our mutual love language."

"The only reason I'm considering TattleCrime at all is you." You admitted. "You're loud and unapologetic and it makes people listen to you. I need someone who can take the heat."

"Because you know that mainstream news outlets are going to cut your writing down to maintain the status quo." Freddie finished your thought.

You pursed your lips. "Exactly. You're the only one who's got the cajones to run the whole story."

"I'm flattered." She said, then paused. "If I move some things around, I can probably get you $1000."

You opened a new tab and typed some words into the search bar. You scrolled through the results, leaving Freddie without an answer.

"Hello?" She said. "[F/N]? Did I lose you?"

"How soon can you pay?" You asked.

Your phone buzzed. You had a notification from paypal. A thousand dollars from Fredrica Lounds.

"Right fucking now." She answered.

"You've got yourself a deal." You said, firmly. You typed out Freddie's email address and pushed send. "It's all yours."

#hannibal lecter #hannibal x reader #hannibal nbc #hannibal x you #will graham x you #hannibal x will #hannibal x you x will #hannibal x reader x will #will graham x reader #will graham #the sommelier #hannigram #hannigram x you #hannigram x reader #aftercare #fluff #freddie lounds

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bbangsoonie · 4 years ago

Text

good for nothing

member: juyeon genre: angst (royal au) word count: 4,635 synopsis: despite being the first born and the kingdom’s princess, you lived your whole life in the shadow of the crown prince born to a concubine. in your plot for revenge, a fool in love comes along your path. warning(s): violence

kingdom masterlist

Princess Y/n. You were the first born of the king and queen, educated beyond societal standards for girls, and incredibly beautiful. Yet, you were disregarded and looked down on since the moment you were born. Your brother, who was born to a concubine, was the crown prince and received much greater respect. The reason? You were a girl. A good-for-nothing girl as your father called you on multiple occasions.

The king was ashamed to have his first born be a daughter. He also felt threatened by your rejection of the status quo. Because of this, he grabbed every opportunity to make you submit to him.

You were exceptionally smart but no one cared to notice. Your desire to learn was ignored and you were forced to embroider butterfly patterns instead. At a young age, you realized your place. You knew your designated fate was to be a political pawn meant to be married off at a beautiful age. To protect the royal family that never considered you as one of their own, you were to marry a complete stranger one day.

However, just because you realized your place didn’t mean you accepted it. You defied the rules at every chance you saw. You remained a headache for the king, but a small enough headache to avoid his wrath.

Unbeknownst to him, you were well versed with the dirty politics of the country. Ever since you were a little girl, you would eavesdrop into the ministers’ conversations and manipulate the eunuchs to take a peak at written grievances sent to the king. You knew about the starving peasants he ignored and the bribes he received. As you grew older, you became hungry for power. When it became apparent that the king was blocking any hope for you, you were determined to take as many people down with you. You refused to suffer alone.

The king always berated you for being greedy. Greedy for education. Greedy for acknowledgement. Greedy for a life that was more than just being a good wife. He reminded you again and again that you would never have a voice in official affairs.

Every time you left his chamber after another lecture, you made sure to humiliate the embarrassment the kingdom called the crown prince. You would outshine him one way or another. Whether it be pointing out his grammar mistakes in front of the scholars or exposing his secret palace escapes to the queen, you would dampen his mood for the day. It was the only thing that gave you a speck of joy.

There was also only one thing that gave you something to look forward to. For years, you had been conspiring against the royal family. You despised the royal family and its classist, sexist, and pretentious values. You planned on getting rid of it once and for all. The kingdom deserved a leader that would rule benevolently. Slowly but surely, you gained the loyalty of several ministers. Soon enough, you would be able to execute the meticulous coup d'état.

But until then, you had to continue to be nothing but the king’s puppet. Which included meeting your fiancé. You were introduced a week ago and wedding preparations were already in full swing.

The man you would be forced to wed, Lee Juyeon, was the first son of the Chief State Councillor. You didn’t like him the moment you saw him. He was a pretty face that grew up with his father’s full love and support. He was both elegant and masculine; he was the definition of perfect and you hated it. A person had to have flaws to be likeable.

For some crazy reason you couldn’t wrap your mind around, Juyeon was infatuated with you. He visited the palace every day just to have you decline his request for a meeting. He was persistent.

Unfortunately for you, he was also crafty. He figured out that announcing his arrival to the king was an effective way to see your face. The king was delighted to see the Chief State Councillor’s son head over heels for his daughter and thus, to your annoyance, daily meetings were arranged for you two.

“Tell me, Lord Lee, what about me is worthy of your obsession?” you asked.

You were sitting at one of the gardens within the palace walls. He had insisted on the location because of its romantic beauty.

“Then tell me, Your Highness, what about me is not to your liking?” he grinned.

“Do you wish to hear the answer of the princess or the answer of Y/n?” you raised a brow, making him laugh.

“You amuse me, Princess Y/n,” he turned his head to look at the pond.

You sighed, wondering how long you had until you could return to your residence. The man next to you was oblivious to your feelings as he rambled on about the dates he wanted to take you on. He caught your attention when he mentioned sneaking you out of the palace for half a day.

“You would really risk taking me outside of the palace?” you perked up.

He was excited to see you finally engaged in the conversation and nodded profusely. He promised to set up an elaborate plan for a smooth date. Grudgingly, you accepted his offer. Your wish to see the village overwhelmed your wish to avoid your soon-to-be consort.

The next day, a court lady secretly found you to notify you of his plans. To evade the eyes of palace maids, you were to escape through a path not commonly used. She helped you scale the wall and you froze when you saw Juyeon on the other side. You sat on top of the wall and he extended his hand for support. With a tight smile, you held his hand and jumped down.

He pulled the veil over your face to keep your identity hidden, blushing when his hand slightly brushed your cheek. He hopped onto the horse and gestured for you to do the same. Hesitantly, you held his hand again to climb on.

Using the excuse of maintaining balance, he urged you to hold on tightly. You weren’t left with an option when he sped up, prompting you to instinctively hug his waist. You didn’t have to see his face to know that he was smiling like a fool.

At last, you finally arrived at the village. Fascinated at the change in environment, you looked like a child surrounded by toys. Chuckling, Juyeon admired the view in front of him. In his eyes, you were prettier than any flower and sweeter than any candy. Feeling his gaze on you, you cleared your throat and began walking.

There was so much to look at. He caught you staring at the rows of yeot and purchased the confectionery without you asking. You immediately popped one into your mouth and he laughed when your cheeks expanded to resemble a squirrel.

“Are you teasing me?” you frowned.

“No, I am appreciating your adorable and lovely appearance,” he answered as he handed you the bag holding the rest of the yeot. His words didn’t fluster you. You simply rolled your eyes and resumed walking.

His long legs were quick to catch up with you. Enjoying your presence, he watched as you fawned over little trinkets. It was a new side of you that he had never seen.

Stopping at an accessory shop, you scanned the norigaes displayed on the table. One of them caught your eye and you held it up for a closer look. It was a beautiful pale pink color that perfectly matched your current hanbok.

“It seems a norigae is better at capturing your heart than I am,” Juyeon pouted.

“Perhaps it is prettier than you,” you shrugged.

“Is this an implication that I am pretty? To a certain extent?” he beamed.

“How do my words become that?” you exclaimed.

With another laugh, he took the accessory from your grasp and went to pay for it. You blinked at the sudden sight of his back, noticing for the first time how broad his shoulders were. When he came back to your side, he held the norigae in front of you but pulled it back when you reached out for it. He pointed at the bag of yeot and opened his mouth. Baffled, you turned around to walk away.

He caught your wrist and spun you back around. He bent down and your face stopped an inch away from his. His usual shy self was gone and he had a confident smirk on his lips.

“Does your heart not sway even at a close distance like this?” he asked. This time, he caught you off guard. When you finally came back to your senses, you hurriedly shoved a piece of yeot into his mouth and stormed off.

“Y/n, you make me laugh too hard and too much!” you heard his voice call out, making you blush crimson with embarrassment.

With your upcoming wedding looming over your head, it became increasingly difficult to communicate with the ministers. There were too many eyes to be wary of. Juyeon, of course, was one of them.

As you spent more time with him, you realized how sentimental he was. He brought you small, meaningful gifts and loved to tell you about the meanings behind each flower.

“Did you know that the plum blossom is one of the indications of spring's arrival?” he asked one day. “They can bloom as early as late March.”

“I think it is quite obvious that it is spring,” you commented, pointing at the variety of flowers surrounding you.

“My personal favorite flower is the rose of sharon,” he continued. “It is nicknamed the “immortal flower” and means “eternal blossom that never fades” because of its resilience. It regrows despite harsh conditions and even after it is damaged. Amazing, isn’t it?”

You hummed, looking for the flower he was talking about.

“I used to hope that our kingdom would take after the flower. We have survived through many tragedies and I hope that we will survive through anything else that tries to beat us down,” his words pricked you for some reason. Would your rebellion be seen as a tragedy or as a heroic deed?

“Now, I like to think that our love will be like the rose of sharon. My love for you will never fade and I will continue to pine after you despite your harsh words. Even if you hurt me, my feelings will transcend time,” he smiled. “The flower does not bloom until July. My wish is to go see them with you. Would you bless me with your presence when the time comes?”

You observed his lovestruck expression and couldn’t bring yourself to say no. Again, you were at a loss trying to understand why he was so besotted with you. His childlike innocence was almost pure to a fault in a place like the palace.

“I shall consider it if you teach me how to swing a sword,” you proposed.

He couldn’t hide both his shock and happiness. He was confused as to why you wanted to ever hold a weapon but glad that you were slowly opening up to him. Without a second thought, he agreed to your proposition.

Juyeon was full of bliss at the thought of spending more time with you. Teaching you swordsmanship would allow him to be intimate with you and he was thrilled. At your first secret lesson, his heart raced at your proximity as he guided your hands on how to properly wield the blade.

A week passed by and you quickly improved each day. Eventually, you became skilled enough to land a fake jab. Seeing your proud smile, he grinned as well.

“I guess I should be on edge now. If I annoy my princess one too many times, my life will literally be at your hands,” he joked.

“Do you regret training me?” you smirked.

“Ah, was this all a part of your plan?” he pretended to gasp. “Either to kill me off or to threaten me to obedience?”

Not finding his joke funny, you blankly stared at him. Noticing the sudden chill in the atmosphere, he awkwardly laughed.

“Do not worry, Your Highness. I will always do as you say. You do not need a sword to make me behave.” he smiled.

You hated to admit it but he had grown on you. His constant attempts to tear down your wall had finally made a crack. You had to stop before he became your weakness.

For the first time in a while, you were summoned to the king’s chamber. Expecting another reprimand, you dreaded the walk there. To your surprise, however, you were greeted with a smile he hadn’t given you in years. It kind of freaked you out.

“You called for me, Your Majesty?” you bowed.

“I hear you have been getting along wonderfully with the Chief State Councillor’s son. Finally, you are fulfilling your duty as this kingdom’s princess,” he commended.

What a back-handed compliment. You wanted to roll your eyes at his passive aggressiveness. Holding back your urges, you politely smiled instead.

“I just wanted to let you know that I will be in a hurry to complete your wedding. I need the Chief State Councillor’s support to find a suitable wife for the crown prince,” he announced.

“Is my marriage merely a way for the crown prince to find a wife with a powerful family?” you shot back.

Your question turned the mood scarily sour. You felt his anger rise as he chastised you for your impudence and disrespect.

“The crown prince is the future leader of our kingdom. He is more than deserving of the immense care, thought, and effort that goes into picking his consort. His consort will be this kingdom’s queen and will be the one to bear the next king. You are nothing but a useless girl who will belong to a different family.”

“I am still a member of the royal family, am I not?”

“You are just a good-for-nothing girl that will leave this palace soon,” he spat. “Now leave. You are dismissed.”

On your way out, you ran into the crown prince who looked at you in a way you found to be offensive. You paused your steps and turned around.

“I wish you fertility, Crown Prince. After all, the kingdom relies on your performance to produce an heir to the throne,” you said, lacing your words with venom. “I would imagine you would hate having to adopt a nephew.”

You could tell you had gotten under his skin yet again and left satisfied. You loathed and condemned your family with a burning passion. You couldn’t wait for the day it would all come to a bitter end.

While you were brooding, you didn’t notice Juyeon sneaking up on you. When you finally saw him, you nearly jumped. Your hand reached out to cover your heart, trying to calm it down. Sheepishly, he apologized for startling you.

Trying to keep you from walking away from him, he held onto the hem of your sleeve. Your heart softened at the gentle manner he treated you with. Ignoring your instincts, you let him cling onto you. Instead of making you turn around to face him, he walked in front of you.

“Will you accompany me to the garden today as well?” he asked earnestly.

Knowing that the court ladies were watching, you reluctantly accepted his invitation once again. This time, he surprised you with a bag filled with yeot. He looked so proud of himself for remembering your love for the sweet treat that it made you laugh. As a reward, he grabbed a piece for himself. Unaware of the smudge it left on the corner of his lips, he was conscious of your gaze and tried to look attractive.

“Worry not, Your Highness. You will get to look at this face every day and every night once we marry,” he assured.

Despite his wise exterior, he had a goofy side to him. He was pure and innocent—everything you weren’t. You could see why the king favored him so much.

“I do not understand why you are so eager to become my consort,” you suddenly blurted. “You know that it is just a flashy title that does not award you with much privileges. It is an empty position; you cannot hold office without a special order from the king. Do you simply see yourself as a stepping stone for your father to bring honor to your family?”

“Is my love for you an acceptable response?” he asked after some thought.

“Is it truly worth your dangerous status as the princess’s husband and king’s son-in-law? The royal family has many enemies,” you warned.

“I will be the one to protect you from such enemies,” he declared.

Was he naive or has his affection for you blinded him?

“Princess Y/n,” he said solemnly as he held your hand. “I promise to love and protect you for as long as my heart beats. No, even after it ceases to beat, I will still yearn for you. I will not demand or expect you to do the same. Even if your feelings for me are not as strong as my feelings for you, I will not blame you. But will you please give me the chance to try to win you over?”

His confession triggered an alarm in your head. He was never supposed to fall for you this hard and you were never supposed to allow him to. He had no idea how cunning and conniving you really were. Only the people in the palace knew how cold-hearted you could be. You had to be in order to survive.

You refused to give him a reply and pulled your hand away. His face fell but he forced himself to smile again. In an attempt to break the tension, he made a random comment on the weather.

After you two parted, you decided to speed things up to initiate the revolt. Once you joined hands in marriage, Juyeon would inevitably end up a target as well. If you wanted to spare him, you needed to overthrow the corrupted royal family before he became a part of it.

It was officially the day before the insurrection. To be honest, you weren’t really nervous. This was what you had been anticipating your entire life.

Yet why did you have a moment of weakness when you saw Juyeon that afternoon? He approached you with that boyish smile that did wonders to your normally rational mind. Feeling what you believed was pity, you wanted to leave him with a pleasant memory.

So you ended up convincing him to sneak you out of the palace again. This time, you were a lot more enthusiastic. You wanted to try all the pastries and insisted that he taste them too.

“You seemed to have a lot on your mind these days,” he carefully pointed out. “Has the problem that has been bothering you been resolved now?”

“It will soon,” you eluded.

You stared at the man in front of you, observing his features. He was, without a doubt, good looking. You could see why all the court ladies, palace maids, and girls of the village were so smitten with him. But you still didn’t get why he chose you to fawn over. Maybe it was because of the lack of affection you grew up with but something about having someone care for you was unsettling.

You had suitors court you before but none of them were as devoted as Juyeon. He always came off as genuine. Perhaps his sincerity was what made you lower your guard.

“I promise to lavish you with such outings if that is what makes you happy,” he proclaimed, almost making you laugh.

“Why do you make so many vows?” you inquired.

“I am a man who keeps his word and you are the only one I give it to,” he grinned. You wondered how happy he had to be to smile so often. You rarely had reasons to be smiling.

He glanced down at the table and examined the rows of binyeos. Holding one up, he held the hair pin against your hair.

“May I gift you this binyeo?” he asked.

You pursed your lips, feeling just a tad bit of guilt. You were used to being showered with extravagance but with Juyeon, it was different. There was an emotional value attached to each present.

“Only if you promise me one other thing,” you negotiated.

“Of course. I will do anything you ask of me,” he responded.

“Promise me that you will not visit the palace tomorrow,” you said sternly. He looked at you with curiosity.

“Tomorrow is… a day of mourning for me. I do not wish to see you until the day after,” you lied.

“This is the first time you have expressed your desire to see me,” he lit up at your last sentence. “I will prepare a magnificent date for when I see you over-morrow.”

You almost felt sorry for his naiveté. And you almost—just almost—felt sorry for deceiving him.

The fateful day arrived at last. You stood, taking one last glimpse at your reflection. Subconsciously, your hand reached out to touch the binyeo in your hair.

The roars of the royal guards and the clanks of combat rumbled throughout the palace. With a determined look, you left your chamber. The sword in your clenched fist dragged across the ground as you made your way to the throne hall.

When you finally busted through the door, the king sat as if he had been waiting for you.

“I should have known that this was your doing,” he scowled. “Was your luxurious life as a princess not enough for you? Could you not fight the temptation of avarice?”

“Nothing about my life was ever comfortable,” you corrected. “I always had to play along to match your mood in order to avoid being married off to an old man just out of your spite. You tried to drill your toxic mentality in me because my individuality terrified you. You made it a point to constantly tear me down. So I made it a point to see your demise.”

“You have always been this sly ever since you were a little girl. I knew I would regret your birth the moment I saw your eyes. And I was right. You are nothing but a vile bitch.”

“For the longest time, I thought I was deserving of your hatred. But I came to the realization that you simply belittled me just for being a girl. Do not forget, Your Majesty, that the womb inside me is the same as the one that bore you the crown prince.”

Mockingly, you approached the throne. It was incredible how that one seat gave its owner immense power.

“Speaking of which, why is it that only men carry on the family name?” you questioned. “Do you not realize that women are the ones who carry on the precious bloodline you always speak of? It is the body of women that conceive and grow another human inside them. It is the body of women that suffer through labor to deliver you children and nurture them to good health. The only thing you do is spread your seeds like a fruit. And then blame women for your own infertility.”

“All throughout history, it has been men who carried on the royal bloodline. What makes you think that you are worthy of special treatment?”

“Bloodline, bloodline, bloodline,” you rolled your eyes in irritation. “Do not fool yourself. It is not blood you care about but name. Men may carry on the nameline but we are the ones who give you the royal blood pumping in your veins.”

You sloppily lifted the sword to the king’s neck, smirking.

“I knew you would be the one to bring my downfall,” he glared.

“Well, how does it feel to have all your fears come true, my king?” you taunted. “You were always afraid that I would either surpass you or ruin you. Now, I will be the one to end this damned bloodline. This good-for-nothing girl will take back the royal blood that was given to you by a woman.”

With that, you slashed his neck. Blood splattered across the wall and on your face. You grimaced, wiping away the warm liquid. You were surprisingly calm in front of such a gruesome sight. That was, until Juyeon came bursting through the door.

After he had parted from you the day before, he could not get you out of his mind. Something about your eyes had been melancholic. Your words sounded like a foreshadow and it left him feeling disturbed. So he broke his promise and went to the palace to see you again. He was alarmed to see the chaos ensuing and immediately searched for you. However, he never expected the situation he stumbled into.

“P-Princess Y/n,” he stuttered, making you aim the weapon at yourself. You never intended or wanted him to witness this.

“Do not come any closer,” you warned.

“Your Highness, please. Put the sword down,” he begged.

“I cannot,” you gulped. “This is how it must end.”

“We-we can run away. Together. We can leave everything behind and I will keep you safe,” he said as he tried his best to stay calm.

You wanted to both laugh and cry. Your life was a suicidal mission. You knew from the beginning that you would not be able to survive. If you failed, you would be executed for treason. If you succeeded, you would be executed to officially end the royal bloodline.

You had to admit, you slightly wavered at one point. Juyeon’s promise to make you happy was enticing. To someone who never strayed close to emotions before, he was like a miracle. He made you feel all sorts of things that you were glad to have experienced.

“I apologize, Lord Lee,” you sadly smiled before you stabbed the blade into your stomach.

“No!” he screamed as he ran to your side.

You slowly fell to the ground with Juyeon’s arms wrapped around your body. His hands shook above the wound as he cried, knowing that he couldn’t take it out without ensuring your death. He never thought that what he taught you would be used against yourself. If he had known that this was what you planned on using your skills for, he never would have taken your offer.

“I am afraid I will not be able to go see the rose of sharons with you,” you said as a tear escaped your eyes.

Your vision began to cloud and you felt the life in you leave with every breath you took. You didn’t even realize that your hand was gripping his clothes, crinkling it. Another tear rolled down your cheek as your head fell back, your neck unable to support it any longer.

He desperately clung onto you, holding your head in his bloodied hands.

“I will bring the flowers to you,” he affirmed.

“Another promise,” you chuckled.

“This one I will be sure to keep,” he stated as his own tears fell to your face.

Next to the weapon embedded in you was the norigae he bought you the first time you escaped the palace together. He looked up to see that you were wearing the binyeo he bought you as well. He sobbed, holding onto you tighter.

“I hope to be reborn as a rose of sharon. That way, I can come see you every spring,” you whispered before you closed your eyes for the last time.

tag list: @dearseungie @cuppasunu @reverienostalgia @elcie-chxn @parfaitz @lovelyutas @mochinyu @leejaeyeons

#deobiwritersnet #the boyz #tbz #juyeon #the boyz angst #tbz angst #juyeon angst #the boyz fics #tbz fics #juyeon fics #the boyz imagines #tbz imagines #juyeon imagines #the boyz scenarios #tbz scenarios #juyeon scenarios #lee juyeon #the boyz juyeon #tbz juyeon

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smells-like-mettaton · 3 years ago

Note

soriel, 1 (chocolate) for the ask game?

Like a Box of Chocolates

Rating: G Word Count: 2734 Read on AO3: here

---

"Ok. I brought a few choices," Sans said while sitting with his back to the door. He pulled a plastic sack full of chocolate and chocolate-adjacent treats out from under his shirt.

"Oh, you did not have to do that." The voice behind the door sounded embarrassed.

"It's no big deal." He shrugged instinctively, though she wouldn't be able to see it. "Not like I candy things like this for you very often."

The lady laughed, even though the pun was a stretch. She was a great audience like that.

"I cannot argue with that. After all, it is the choco-thought that counts."

Sans let out a wheeze. Man, she had him beat in the bad jokes department. He needed to up his game.

"What can I say, I'm a sweet guy." That joke would work better if she could see his wink.

"You certainly are, my friend."

Sans blinked. He hadn't been prepared for the genuine warmth in her voice. Now he felt something like a melted chocolate himself.

"Uh. You'd better wait and make sure I didn't pick out garbage before you say that." He chuckled nervously and spread out the chocolates in the snow.

"Alright. Hit me with your best choco-shot."

He laughed out loud at that one too. She could really squeeze some mileage out of chocolate puns.

"First off we have the MTT-Brand Chocolate Mettaton. Which is exactly what it sounds like. Chocolate in the shape of everyone's favorite robot superstar." He scanned the back of the wrapper. "Contains sequins and glitter, but it's still monster food, so probably won't cause any more indigestion than Temmie Flakes. Still, wouldn't blame ya if you passed on that."

The lady laughed. "I do not know this 'Mettaton,' but he sounds like someone…"

Her voice trailed off, the way it always did when she neared a personal topic. It seemed to be happening more and more often lately. Sans didn't know if that was a good sign, or if he needed to do a better job of distracting her.

"Someone I know would have liked that," she finished clumsily.

"Welp. It's yours, then." He attempted to slide it under the door.

Attempted. The thick block of chocolate wouldn't fit through the narrow space.

"What are my other options?" The lady asked, not seeming to hear his failure.

(Or just ignoring it. The way they always ignored things they didn't want to acknowledge.)

Oh well. He'd deal with that later, if she wanted to.

He picked up the next box and rattled it. It looked thin enough to fit under the door.

"I think this one's called, uh, pocket?” He couldn’t tell for sure, since the box was labeled in a language he didn’t recognize. Where did Alphys get this stuff? “A pal gave it to me. They’re like chocolate-covered sticks, I think."

"Not precisely what I was looking for, but I would love to try it regardless," she said. "If I am allowed to have both options, I mean. If not, I should probably stick with the Em-Tee-Tee."

Sans bit back a snort. So she hadn't heard after all. That made this a lot more awkward.

"Do you wanna hear the other options first? Wouldn't want ya to have any regrets."

"Oh! There are more?"

She sounded as surprised as a kid finding an extra fry in the bottom of their Grillby's bag. He couldn't help grinning.

"Yup. Next up is a chocolate spider donut—”

“Made by spiders, for spiders, of spiders?” The voice seemed on the verge of laughter again.

His eyesockets widened. “Uh… welp. Guess you don’t need the whole spiel, huh?”

“There is a spider bakesale right around the corner from my home,” the lady explained. “I believe they are saving for a… ‘heated limo’? To travel safely through Snowdin. I wish I could help them, but I did not think to take much gold when I…”

Another dead end. That was fine, Sans could piece together enough. Not that her personal life was any of his business, anyway.

“If it makes ya feel any better, they really raked me over the coals for this one.”

“It does not!” came her quick reply. “I only asked for a chocolate bar. Not for you to spend money that you need on me.”

Geez, this lady was too good for him. As if Sans ever really went out of his way for anyone.

Except Papyrus, but he was family. And sometimes Grillby, if he felt bad about failing to pay his tab for too long. And Alphys, but he owed her for screwing off after space-time blew up in their faces.

And now, the lady behind the door. The lady he didn’t owe anything to, except a few good laughs.

Who was he kidding? Those laughs were more important to him than anything.

“Eh, it just cost me one day of selling ‘dogs. Donut worry about it.”

“Very well. Since it was for a good cause, I will not grill you any further. But please tell me that was the last chocolate you purchased for me.”

“It’s the last one I purchased.” He grinned. While she couldn’t see his expression, she must have heard the but in his voice.

“Please tell me you did not steal any chocolate for me.”

“Geez, lady, what do you take me for? I’d never commit petty thievery.”

“Well, that is reassuring.”

“Yep. Gotta save room for the real high-dollar crimes. Like the illegal hot dog stand.”

The voice behind the door went silent. He wished he could see her face now more than ever. His own grin slowly slid from his skull.

“Everyone knows about it,” he reassured her. “If the King really wanted to shut me down, he’d have done it a long time ago.”

“Oh, I am not judging you for that. I am sure the law is rigged against you if the King has any say in it.” Her voice was surprisingly bitter.

His real problem was that he couldn’t ever find the necessary documents to get licensed in food preparation. His birth certificate was presumably in whatever alternate dimension his old man had blasted them out of.

“You are judging me for something, though,” he realized. The chill of the snow seeped into his bones, but he didn’t dare adjust his position. Somehow he felt that if he moved, she would disappear.

“I am not. I was only thinking about…” She sighed. “It is complicated. There was a time when I could have helped you, but it is long past.”

“Help me? Look, lady, the ‘dog stand is fine. Promise. Better than fine, since I don’t gotta pay taxes on it.”

She chuckled at that.

“Very well. Forgive a silly old lady for worrying.”

“Done.” He smiled, settling back against the door more comfortably.

He should’ve known she’d have a problem with his illegal activities, though. She was a classy lady, and he was… him. Why had he even brought it up? It wasn’t a great joke. Did he really just want her to know?

Eh, whatever. She wasn’t mad, so no harm done, right?

“I would like to know how you acquired this other chocolate, if it was not through your sticky fingers.” She sounded like she was grinning.

“Huh? Oh.” He blinked and dug out the last chocolate of the bunch. Blue dusted his cheeks. “QC—that’s the lady who runs the shop in town—gave ‘em to me for free. They’re called, uh, kisses.”

QC had a knowing look in her eyes when she’d offered the bag of chocolates to him. It was his own fault for implying they were for a girl. Everyone already thought he screwed around in the woods on his shifts, and with the way gossip travelled in a small town, everyone at Grillby’s would be asking about his girlfriend tonight.

“Kisses,” the lady behind the door echoed. “This is not one of your jokes, is it?”

“Not this time. Sorry to disappoint.” His grin felt too tight. “They’re, uh, tiny chocolates. Kinda cone-shaped? QC makes ‘em herself, so they’ve gotta be good.”

“Oh.” Oddly, the voice did sound disappointed. Sans couldn’t imagine why. Not like he could kiss her through the door, even if he had lips. And even if there was some unlikely timeline where she wanted a kiss from him.

He wanted to thump his skull back against the door, but there was no point in worrying her like that.

“In that case, I will take the kisses. They will be perfect for…”

He was sure she would leave it at that. Cover up with some non sequitur.

So his eyesockets went wide when she said, “for the anniversary of my child’s passing.”

“Oh.” He let out a strangled little laugh. “I—geez, I’m sorry. If I’d known—”

“You would have what? Spent even more money on this silly old lady, who cannot even leave to buy her child’s favorite chocolate?” Her voice was firm. “No. I thought you deserved to know, after the trouble you went to, and because you shared your own secret with me today.”

“My ‘dog stand is hardly a secret,” he said, still feeling a little shaky. She had a kid? A dead kid?

Well, who in the Underground didn’t have skeletons in their closet? Metaphorically or literally. She was still his best friend. If she wanted his pity, she would’ve said something sooner.

“Regardless,” she said. “It is in the past. Forget it, if you wish. But please do not treat me any differently.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he said sincerely. If there was one thing he was good at, it was maintaining the status quo. “So, uh. These chocolates. I kind of wanted you to have all of ‘em, if that’s alright with you.”

“It would be rude to refuse a gift, would it not?” She sounded like she was smiling again, to his relief.

“There’s just one problem. Uh. Don’t think they’re all gonna fit under the door.” He rapped on the stone surface with his knuckle for emphasis.

“I did not assume they would. The recipe I gave you before hardly passed through.”

Sans blinked. “Then you—huh?”

“I will open the door just a fraction. It can only be done from the inside.” She paused, like she was gathering a breath. “I would ask that you do not look. I promise I will not peek, either.”

Sans’s ribcage tightened. She was going to open the door. She would be right there, with no stone between them.

The thought opened a desperate floodgate within him. He hadn’t realized just how badly he wanted to see her, to know her, to live off of more than just scraps and unfinished sentences.

She once had a child. She had some kind of beef against the King. She wanted to give charity to spiders, but didn’t have enough money. All these facts he filed away, tucking them into the grooves in his ribcage.

It would be enough. He’d duct tape those gates shut again, if he had to. He wasn’t going to betray the trust she’d shown him.

“Got it. You don’t wanna be smitten by my good looks, I understand,” he joked.

(He had a feeling it would be the other way around, if anything. Not that quality of jokes translated to quality of appearance—he would know. If it did, he’d have biceps like his brother.)

“It would be tragic. Much too high a price for you to handsome chocolate to me.”

“Heh, I’m sure you’re a door-able too. But I’ll keep my sockets shut, since our friendship hinges on it.”

That got a raucous laugh out of her, the kind that started off high-pitched and quickly became something of a snorting bleat. That sound was sweeter than chocolate to him.

...Man, his pals at Grilby’s would be right to dunk on him. He was a massive dork.

“Alright,” she said once she caught her breath, “if you are ready, my friend…”

“Yeah.” He nodded. “Better choco-late than never, huh?”

That one only got a snort, but he wasn’t sure if that was because the pun fell flat, or because she was nervous. As far as he knew, she hadn’t been outside of the Ruins in years. And here she was, trusting a sentry—someone whose job it was to keep a look out—to turn a blind eye.

It was a good thing he’d never been good at his job.

Stone ground against stone with a dramatic rumble. His eyesockets stayed shut. Warmth emanated from somewhere near his shoulder, and he lifted the bag of chocolates.

His small hand brushed a large fur-covered one. A shiver trailed down his spine. One small touch shouldn’t have done so much to him, but—but she was real. She was more than just a voice behind a door. Which he knew, but knowing and feeling could be worlds apart at times.

She took the bag, and the moment was over. But the door didn’t close.

“My dear friend,” she whispered, her voice sounding closer than ever. “Would it be presumptuous to ask another favor of you?”

“‘Course not. Glad to do a favor for my favor-ite person.” He kept his tone light, unaffected by the swirling emotions inside him.

“If I could… oh, dear, this is embarrassing.”

He resisted the urge to open his eyes, to see what look might be on her face.

“It has simply been so long… may I hold your hand a moment longer?”

He felt the marrow heating within his bones.

“That all? I gotta hand it to ya, you made me think you needed an arm and a leg.”

She chuckled before awkwardly fumbling to grasp his hand again.

Heat poured from her palm into his phalanges. Aside from the fur, there were several spots of soft skin—probably paw pads. Was she a dog monster, like the Canine Unit in town? She didn’t make nearly enough dog jokes for that to be the case. Her laugh sounded more like a goat’s, but she obviously didn’t have hooves. Maybe she was some kind of chimera? You didn’t see those often nowadays, but then again, no one saw monsters from the Ruins, either.

“Thank you,” she said, her voice as soft as the snow that began to drift around him.

“Not disappointed?” He asked, only half-joking. “My hand can’t be as comfy as yours.”

“Ah, but it is all your bone. And that is wonderful to me.”

“Geez, old lady.” He was grateful she couldn’t see his blush. “You’re pretty fur-fect yourself.”

When she laughed, her body shook all the way down to her hand. The feeling more than made up for all the G he’d spent on chocolate and donuts.

Suddenly his hand was being lifted up, and then something soft pressed against his knuckles. His soul flared erratically, and his eyes nearly flew open. If they had, he was sure his left eyelight would have been blue from shock.

“A kiss for a kiss,” she said slyly. “It is only fair.”

“Heh heh…” His voice shook with more than laughter. “Technically, that was one kiss for a bag of kisses. Pretty sure that math doesn’t square up.”

“Oh, you are quite right! One day we will have to circle back and rectify that.”

He practically had to cast gravity magic on himself to keep his eyes from flying open.

“You—huh?” He said intelligently.

“Perhaps not soon,” she clarified. “This has all been… a lot, for me. But thanks to you, my dear friend, this day has not been so bitter as I am used to.”

“Uh, no problem, then. With all that chocolate, I hope it’s sweet.”

Sweet as the anniversary of a death could be, anyway. He grimaced. Maybe that joke was too soon, but she just squeezed his hand before finally letting go.

“I do think it will be,” she said softly. “I will look forward to hearing more of your punny jokes tomorrow.”

The door scraped shut, and he hesitantly opened his eyes. He couldn't help inspecting the door to see if anything changed. Pressing his still-warm hand against the smooth stone.

“Heh. Good luck getting rid of me now.” He grinned.

Then he tucked his hands in his pockets, where her kiss remained like a tattoo on his bone.

#tali writes #safeutdr #soriel #sans #toriel #fic tag #very happy with how this one turned out :D #hope you like it and thanks for the request!#prompt requests

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dianaburnwood · 3 years ago

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Since work culture was brought up, what do you think the power level between higher ups and lower downs were like at the ICA? Did the leaders ever fear that anyone could expose them to the world, or more like the regulars feared that by the time they even thought about exposing them (hello Royce's algorithms) they'd be long gone. I'm sure it payed like crazy even for janitors, so they might have no reason to even turn teams? Not gonna ask about stuff like healthcare & benefits but anything else you'd like to explore I'm always happy to read!

Awww thank you so much!

Chongqing was such a fantasy for me because I've thought about the ICA a lot, and actually getting to go there proved some of my headcanons as real canon so.... that was a TREAT

Gonna put this under the cut because obviously I wrote a long answer

Ok so,

Locations, Operations

Something that did surprise me about WoA was learning that the ICA does not have many physical locations. I'd assumed they had quite a few scattered across the world. Places that are easily wiped down without a trace (like Chongqing) but somewhere for their numerous paper files to live (we see the ICA use paper files in Contracts, Blood Money, and Absolution), and offices for support staff. Not handlers and agents, but people like the many ICA heavies we see Travis command in Absolution.

However, WoA's ICA is much more modern and sleek. Everything is digital, encrypted, untraceable. They are supreme analysts, able to find a super hacker like Olivia with great ease - twice. They don't have many physical locations, everything is done online. I think it's very unlikely handlers and agents are ever seen in any of the offices unless for a specific purpose. The few physical locations the ICA does use are for data storage and R&D, like Chongqing, training facilities like the Arctic Circle (I am guessing Greenland or Svalbard), and I'd like to think they have at least one physical location in each continent, for analysts and support staff.

Power structures

The board of directors is presumably decentralised, except when it comes to big decisions e.g. promotions, new members, threats. I assume new board members are voted in by the existing board. We know that management is largely hands-off (e.g. not even knowing that Travis was diverting large funds to his own projects, particularly in creating Victoria) but when they do find out someone is screwing around, they bring the hammer down hard.

Diana stole agency assets? Kill her. 47 stole agency assets? Kill him. Oh it's Travis fucking about? Kill him. Shadow Client is playing with us? Kill him. Soders is two-timing us with Providence? Kill him.

They probably got pretty liberal with the kill button ever since The Franchise almost obliterated them. I imagine the board and some secret assets largely survived, seeing as the ICA was able to re-establish themselves again at the end of Blood Money. Even though Diana says she's the only one left, I always assumed she meant "of that branch", or the ICA used to be a LOT smaller (which could also be true).

Although they may kill everyone they don't like, the ICA is not petty. They're all about maintaining the status quo, and making the best decisions to keep themselves at the top. They stay impartial, and follow the money. Despite happily ordering a hit on Diana and 47, they welcome them back to the ICA once they find out Travis was the real problem. Despite killing Soders for being a Providence mole, they had no problem accepting Providence's fat cheques to hunt down Grey, and later, the ICA went ahead and merged with Providence because they thought it was the best power play, even if that meant, once again, putting out a hit on their best agent (you'd think they'd learn).

The board probably makes a point of getting to know their handlers (or at least, their top handlers) as the novel Enemy Within made a point of saying that the ICA chairman had a soft spot for Diana. While the novel is just tie-in material and not related to game canon, I assume the writer was briefed somewhat on the structure of the ICA.

As for fearing exposure, yes and no. Diana exposed them and she still managed to keep her job (though she had a good reason). But in a lot of ways, the ICA doesn't need to fear exposure, because they are an open secret. In canon, they have ties to every major government - which is why they maintain political neutrality. They have worked with Interpol and the CIA in canon to bring down terrorists. Lawmakers know about the ICA, but they look the other way because they need an organisation that can get its hands dirty without any political ties. They are the International Contract Agency.

It's for this reason that I think the ICA managed to bounce back after Blood Money, and again after Diana exposed them in Absolution. I also think they'll bounce back after 47's exposure in WoA. Sure, they have to wipe the slate clean and wait for the public outcry to focus on something else, but then they'll be back to work.

However, where exposure does the most damage is to the ICA's reputation. People pay the ICA for their discretion. A contract agency is no good if everyone finds out you paid to have someone killed. And with their client reputations ruined, and handlers/agents exposed, it will take some time to rebuild.

Benefits, Work-life

I don't think it's worth it for anyone working for the ICA to turn on them. Soders only did it because he was dying, and Providence could save his life (though honestly, the ICA probably could have as well). For anyone working with sensitive material in real life, you need to sign an NDA. It's probably the same for the ICA. And while an NDA may not be legally enforceable when the job itself is illegal, we've already established that the ICA has plenty of lawmakers in their pocket. They could ruin you, and that's if they decided not to kill you instead.

Aside from that, I am sure everyone is paid out the ass. They get to work around the world with the best tech, they have power, protection, privilege, they are all set. You mentioned janitors, but I'm sure they are paid better than janitors anywhere else, and they wouldn't have access to sensitive information so anything they did talk about would be hearsay at best (if they were to risk it).

We know that handlers undergo extensive background checks and psychological examination before being hired. and I'm willing to bet the ICA does at least a background check for everyone they hire. So even if you're cleaning up some day and overhear something... weird... you're more likely to go home and count your money when the organisation in question knows your address and the names of your pets.

However, what about changing jobs, or retirement? Both are entirely reasonable, I'm sure. And just like with sensitive information in real life, if anyone blabbed company secrets to their new job or retired friends, they'd likely face the same consequences they would have for breaking NDA during employment.

I imagine the healthcare and benefits rival any big private company, and are probably very similar, as the ICA can easily disguise themselves as something legit on the books. So, great private insurance, likely their own medical facilities (and medical teams should something go wrong in the field), bonuses, flexible hours, plentiful vacation time, solid pensions, etc.

This was a lot of fun to answer. Let me know if I left anything out!

#hitman fandom #ICA #long answer

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aro-is-gay-af · 4 years ago

Text

Slavic Names in Twilight | Meta

This post is going to be long, so if you don’t have time, I advise you to come back here later (or not come back at all, up to you).

Honestly, I have no words for Smeyer anymore. I, probably like most of us, read the books while being an adolescent. When I was 12 I didn’t see a lot of things that happened to be in the books and were: a) misogynistic b) sexist c) abusive d) racist and that the story itself was bound to Mormons (sick!).

If you want to read about it a little bit more I strongly recommend this post by @stregoni-benefici and @carlislesscarf

This post isn’t going to be about how Smeyer treated The Quileute Tribe, indigenous people, people of color or women. This post is going to be about how lazy Smeyer exactly was while creating this story and how her prejudices influenced and created false image of yet another culture.

Why am I making such a fuss because of this? A few days ago I was reading something about Garrett on Twilight Wiki page. By sheer luck, I clicked on Kate’s character and, what I saw there, outraged me to the point where I needed a little while to calm myself.

I was 12 when I first read the books. I never bought official twilight guide, I only used Twilight Wiki to keep myself up to date. I clicked on Kate’s character and saw that she hails from Slovakia. Forgive my utter confusion, when I remembered other sisters’ names. Tanya and Irina. Also, Kate was created by Sasha, who also created Vasilli (an immortal child), which is why she was executed in the first place.

While the story is charming, WHY THE FUCK DO THEY HAVE SUCH NAMES?!

To understand my rage, I need to elucidate the matter a little bit for all of you. This will be the historical part.

According to Twilight Wiki, Sasha was changed before 1000 AD. Then, she created Tanya, and not very long after, Kate and Irina. And now. What were the historical odds while it happened?

Before 1000 AD, Slovakia wasn’t Slovakia but Great Moravia. Great Moravia lasted about a century - the time span here is approximately circa 820 AD to 906 AD. When Great Moravia no longer existed, territory was taken by Hungarians (Magyar tribes also referred to as Hungarian clans) and the development of future Kingdom of Hungary began. Then, around 1000-1001, King Stephan was crowned as the first King of Hungary. Some elements from the former Great Moravia were acquired by The Kingdom of Hungary.

King Stephen managed to establish eight counties within his kingdom. Around 1015 some territories of today-Slovakia were acquired by Boleslav I of Poland (later king of Poland), however, King Stephen managed to recapture the territories in 1018. Wikipedia isn’t consistent here - while on History of Slovakia we have these information, the History of Poland during the Piast dynasty says:

From 1003 to 1004, Bolesław intervened militarily in Czech dynastic conflicts. After his forces were removed from Bohemia in 1018, Bolesław retained Moravia.

and:

[translation here is mine as the site is in Polish] Between 1003 and 1025/1031 the lands of today's Slovakia were part of the Kingdom of Poland after being conquered by Bolesław Chrobry. The Polish-Hungarian Chronicle described that "The Polish borders stretched as far as the banks of the Danube, to the town of Ostříhomia, then to the town of Eger, and further to the river called Ciepla [Topl'a] as far as the town of Salis, and there the borders between Hungarians, Ruthenians and Poles ended".

Than, probably around 1031 AD the territories were acquired back. King Stephen died and his kingdom fell into internal conflicts. Soon, in 1042 AD emperor Henry III mingled to acquire some lands for himself (he was the Holy Roman Emperor). Anyway, then came 1048 AD and that’s what happened:

In 1048, King Andrew I of Hungary conceded one-third of his kingdom (Tercia pars regni) in appanage to his brother, Duke Béla. [...] During the following 60 years, the Tercia pars regni were governed separately by members of the Árpád dynasty. [...] The dukes accepted the kings' supremacy, but some of them (Béla, Géza and Álmos) rebelled against the king in order to acquire the crown and allied themselves with the rulers of the neighbouring countries (e.g., the Holy Roman Empire, Bohemia).

The history of the Tercia pars regni ended in 1107, when King Coloman of Hungary occupied its territories taking advantage of the pilgrimage of Duke Álmos (his brother) to the Holy Land. Although, Duke Álmos, when returned to the kingdom, tried to reoccupy his former duchy with the military assistance of Henry V, Holy Roman Emperor, but he failed and was obliged to accept the status quo.

Source for the two quotes above.

You may ask, why on Earth did I just present to you part of history of Slovakia, Poland and Hungary. Because I want you to understand how completely ridiculous and simultaneously offending are the names of characters that Smeyer gave within this coven.

History shows us that, even though, these times weren’t exactly peaceful, there wasn’t an ongoing war. We have Hungarian tribes and the part, when some territories were acquired by a Polish king. What I mean by that, is that probably names around 1000 AD varied as to where your family lived, what was your social status, and probably were influenced by newly adopted Christianity. It is more likely that people on this lands were named with names of Hungarian origin than Russian. And I still think the majority of names were of Slavic origin, only with some local variations going on.

Now, a little bit of common knowledge. People who descend from Poland, Slovakia, Czech Republic and Hungary are best buddies for life, even if they never saw each other. We have mutual respect for these countries and for ourselves, as our history brought us together multiple times (bad times and good ones). Russia IS NOT a part of this “mutual respect pact”. Mostly due to events that happened during both World Wars (i.e. Katyń Massacre), as well as other ones (Partitions of Poland, Eastern Bloc - communism).

Most of the names used by Smeyer are of Russian (or Greek, or Hebrew) origin. Not Slavic origin. And while Russia is also the part of Slavic languages, there’s a significant distinction between West Slavic Languages (Slovakian, Czech, Polish language), East Slavic Languages (Belarusian, Russian, Ukainian) and South Slavic Languages (i.e. Serbian, Croatian, Bulgarian).

It makes difference to the point that if I go to Slovakia or Czech Republic I'm able to communicate with people in my native language (Polish) while they can answer me in their native language. Not everything is going to be the same but you're able to maintain a conversation mostly about every topic that you'd like to discuss. It isn't impossible to do so with Russian or Ukrainian but it's much harder and there are more differences, and sometimes you aren’t able to communicate this way. The same goes with i.e. Croatian or Bulgarian.

Don’t get me wrong, dear friends from Russia (if anyone from Russia will ever read this). I’m pissed off because even though Smeyer created not one, but four characters with SLOVAKIAN origin, she didn't use at least one name which fully originated in that territories (and probably was used) around 1000 AD. She went for Russian names because, sure, let's do that, there's no big difference anyway and it’s easier. To add to that, Smeyer used Russian names which are widely used NOWADAYS, not ones which were probably popular (or just used) thousand years ago.

Now, quick briefing on very popular names from that time (c. 1000 AD) in Slovakia and Czech Republic.

Here’s the full article on Slavic names.

While some of these names are used today, some of them aren’t at all or are used in a different, more evolved form.

Now, to the names of our characters. The most explainable and justified name here is Kate’s name. In Twilight Wiki we can find that her actual name was Katrina and that her preferable name now is Kate. Let’s see the origins of the name Kate.

Full article here.

While we can read that variations of that name in Czech are: “ Katka, Kateřina, Kačka, Káťa, Kačenka, Káča, Kačí, Kačena” and in Slovakian “Katka, Katarína” still the origins aren’t Slavic.

Next, Irina.

As Wikipedia says:

Irina is a feminine given name of Ancient Greek origin, commonly borne by followers of the Eastern Orthodox Church. It is derived from Eirene (Ancient Greek: Εἰρήνη), an ancient Greek goddess, personification of peace.

Diminutive forms in Slavic languages include Ira, Irinka, Irinushka, Irisha, Irka, Irochka, Irinochka.

Here, we also don’t have Slavic origin. While it’s better than with Kate’s name because origins here seem to hugely blend, the proper origin of Irina’s name is Ancient Greek. I will never believe that a peasant girl from around 1000 AD was named Irina.

Here’s the full article.

Next, Vasilli.

Wikipedia doesn’t say much, except it’s a RUSSIAN NAME with Greek origin.

Full article here.

Now, finally, we’ve two names left. First, Sasha.

Finally, first one, which has Slavic origin. And while this name has many variations in many languages, I don’t believe that anyone in Slovakia prior to 1000 AD would name their child Sasha. This name gained popularity in 1970s, and I believe that it would be used rather as diminutive of a name in 1000 AD than a name itself.

Full article here.

Last, but not least, Tanya.

Here, also, it isn’t a full name. Full name is Tatiana, and Tanya, especially in Slavic it is used as a nickname implying intimacy with the person OR used for baby talk.

Full article here.

What’s my point here? Even though two of these five names are partially Slavic in origin, they sound like Russian names. Not Eastern Slavic in one fucking bit. Sure, Smeyer could do a simplification and say that, yeah, girls acquired other names as centuries passed. Agreed, even strongly.

BUT

Smeyer never said anything like this. Also, I’m under the impression that this names were meant to sound Russian. And, people, don’t get me wrong, I really hold nothing against Russians, but because of doing such thing Smeyer has perpetuated certain patterns and beliefs that have become firmly established in US culture and West culture in general by now.

No wonder why some people never distinguish between Russia, Slovakia, Poland, Czech Republic or Ukraine, or other countries from Easter Bloc. How can they, where in majority of mass media they’re taught that IT IS EXACTLY THE SAME THING. Why should they bother?

I have many friends among Slovakian people. Slovakia is like a second home to me. I also have a few friends from Czech Republic. And before, I’ve never been bothered by this name thing because I was a child. Today I couldn’t be silent about it.

It’s sad that another culture and fantastic history was just blended in with Russia because why not. I don’t understand why in Western movies or books all people from former Eastern Bloc need to be Russian.

I am Polish and to me it’s just extremely sad. We (and I think I can count in here Slovakia, Czech Republic, Hungary, but also Croatia or Serbia) have fantastic culture and very long, eventful history. People from these countries are welcoming and share great hospitality.

I don’t know why Smeyer did something like this, but I suppose it’s just a thing she does to everyone. Rip away their culture and pretend she didn’t do it.

I am grateful that this fandom is a lot wiser than the creator of the books. This is what I said in the beginning of this post. Smeyer could’ve gone to library and read a little about the history and the names. I mean, If she didn’t found it on the Internet, because it was 2006, I believe, so she could research it. If there was nothing on the Internet, I’m sure a library would do.

She did a poor research or didn’t do it at all. And that’s what happened. Was it worth it? I don’t think so.

***

Everyone, please, comment, but be kind to each other (and to me xd). I wrote what I felt. As I’ve told you already, I’m Polish and I really felt that I should write this meta/disclaimer from a point of view of a person who lives in Slavic-origined country and has many Slavic-origined friends.

I still feel triggered because of this. Reblog this so others could see and say what they think.

#twilight meta #slavic culture #polish culture #history #cultural and historical references in twilight #smeyer being an ignorant discourse #smeyer nonsense #this woman is bound to white supermacy #Slavic names #Polish & Slovakian historical background #twilight revival #the twilight saga #smeyer cannot use library properly #neither can she use internet #slovakian culture #why the fuck should you confuse Slovakian people with Russian people?#Hungary mentioned #twilight #twilight saga

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itsclydebitches · 3 years ago

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Oh I just had a horrifying thought. Based on how the interaction between RWBY co and Oz went, If they ever have him and Qrow reconcile, its going to be the exact same isn't it? Him being the only one apologizing even though Qrow punched both him and Oscar.

Most likely, yeah. We have no reason to believe that Qrow would be written as more mature and open-minded than the other 8+ people involved, not after the show had him straight up lie about how Clover died. If Qrow isn’t allowed to accept some of the responsibility for a comparatively minor character, why would we think he’d accept some responsibility for the character the story hated on for three volumes, four if we count Yang’s accusations in Volume 5, and who has already been made to shoulder all of the guilt for this conflict himself?

Looking back, getting an apology for the punch was always a lost cause. The group clearly didn’t care that it happened, were slow to react when Jaune had Oscar up against the wall, Ruby took a headshot at a potentially aura-less Cordovin, Weiss arrives at the mansion armed against her brother… the group is now quite happy to excuse any and all violence against allies (trusted friends, family, political allies, etc.) provided they think they deserve it. And, sadly, we’ve seen lately that the show isn’t at all concerned with the moral nuances of these situations either. Actually, it’s not even nuance at this point, it’s straight up ignoring glaring, undeniable factors like “Qrow teamed up with Tyrian” or “Whitely is a minor your mom begged you to protect” or “Emerald was literally trying to kill Penny an hour ago.” Regarding Qrow’s situation with Ozpin, we’ve got the same problem as with Ruby: they’re both damning him for keeping secrets while they happily keep their own. Qrow kept everything else a secret from the group too, from magic existing to the war he was fighting. He kept the personal secrets of his semblance and ability to transform. He was there in the room when Ruby told those same lies to Ironwood, later absolving her (and thus himself)of guilt and continuing to help her maintain that deception, which included telling all of Mantle about Salem without mentioning her immortality. Qrow helped do to a city what Ozpin did to him, yet I have absolutely no doubt that this will be ignored. Or, if it's brought up, everyone will handwave the hypocrisy away by saying that Qrow is one of the established good guys, so it's fine if he does the supposedly morally reprehensible acts.

The problem with the Ozpin apology scene is that it builds off the feelings immediately post-vision (which are already uniform and incredibly narrow), rejecting everything else that has happened across nearly three volumes of content. It ignores the assumption that the group just needed time to cool down, that Ozpin saved their lives in the airship, that when push came to shove they repeated his choices (the biggest factor here), that they’re supposedly learning how hard it is to trust others, that they’ve now seen firsthand how powerful—terrifying—Salem really is, that they’ve told the world about her without any plan for mitigating the repercussions (what Ozpin was trying to avoid), and that Ozpin was just kidnapped same as Oscar was, helping him to both escape and turn two villains to their side (however stupid that was). But no one cares about any of it! Literally nothing Ozpin has or has not done in three volumes matters. The group isn’t grateful for what he’s done to keep them safe. The group also isn’t frustrated with how long he chose to stay away. Whether positive or negative, they have no new thoughts or feelings on the matter, nor do they think differently from one another in any regard. Notably, the apology from Ozpin comes after Ren has learned not to question the group's decisions, otherwise he likely would have taken Ozpin's side: we weren't ready for this, we made awful decisions with lasting repercussions, so are you honestly surprised he didn't want to tell us everything when this is the result?

Absolutely nothing has changed with Ren back to the status quo and everyone else has never left, so there’s no reason to think that Qrow would be any different. Especially when, beyond the Clover situation, we have the problem of Qrow ignoring that Ozpin exists, in the same way that the group mostly ignored Qrow’s existence throughout Volume 8. Does Qrow want Ozpin to come back? Does him deciding not to drink mean he’s come to terms with Ozpin’s secret? Did he see Clover as a replacement? Does he long for his mentor again like Ironwood did? Does he think Ozpin might have been able to help talk Ironwood down? Does he care whether Ozpin and Oscar made it out of Mantle? We have no answers because the most emotional work Qrow gets it silently shouting the names of his nieces at the volume’s end. That's it. Everything else is relegated to a revenge quest that disappears because Robyn (again) states that Qrow is better than the evil Clover. Does that remind us of any recent speeches Qrow gave to Ruby? Even if the show were interested in exploring the complexities of this situation and how views should have changed after months’ time to think on things and numerous, life threatening events having gone down… we have no foundation for that work. Qrow can’t easily go up and apology to Ozpin for his part in all this when, for three volumes, the most he’s mentioned Ozpin is to say that he’s a worse person than Ruby. That is by no means a hopeful or logical setup.

#rwby #rwde #mymetas

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luna-rainbow · 3 years ago

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First off I wanted to thank you for feeding us with all of the tfatws critiques lately, and I hope we're not annoying you with all the asks you've been getting about it recently. It's been really great to know that I'm not the only one with issues with the show and your posts are always super insightful to read.

The entire way that the writers handled Zemo in the show makes me want to punch myself in the face. It’s so OOC for Bucky to release him under any circumstance. The writers really expected me to buy into rebranding him as a likable anti hero when he tore the Avengers apart, retraumatized Bucky, and ruined Team Caps lives. They literally cared more about trying to make Zemo likable than they did addressing the trauma that he inflicted on Bucky. He violated Bucky in the same way that HYDRA did and shows now remorse for it. It’s hardly even mentioned and they put more weight on Zemo forgiving Bucky (“I hold no grudges against you for what you thought you had to do” which, what? I don’t even understand what he’s forgiving Bucky for or even talking about here) than Bucky forgiving Zemo--which by the way, Bucky is under zero obligation to do and frankly I wouldn’t even want him to. We need to stop telling people that they need to forgive their abusers in order to move on. Yes, for some people it works. But for others it doesn’t and both are valid forms of healing.

Bucky should have shot him in the face.

Sorry this is so long lol, I’m just really mad.

Thanks for the ask! I have to say I'm getting really amazing asks these days so it's all you guys inspiring me with interesting thoughts!

I have a feeling this is going to get long because this is something that I have Strong Feelings about, so I'm going to tackle it in two parts.

Zemo

I really want to talk about this guy because I think everyone's fallen for his new nonchalant charms, and while yes, it's got its moments but this manipulative sardonic rich white man trope where have we seen it before OH RIGHT TONY.

CACW Zemo was actually one of my favourite MCU villains. He had heart, he had intelligence, he had resolve. The only thing he didn't have was superpowers, but he plenty made up for it. He knew what he was doing was wrong, but he was driven to do it anyway, because the Avengers had ripped a void in his life and revenge was the only thing that could fill it. He had nothing left, so he had nothing to lose, and he was ready to go to any length to destroy the happiness that the Avengers had - that they had taken from him. And that felt real to me, yanno, more so than the 20 other villains who wanted to rule the universe. But he was still squarely a villain.

TFATWS Zemo is...just a mess of a caricature, honestly. His goal had been the Avengers because they were idolised beyond reproach - his entire arc was because Sokovia was destroyed but these American larrikins went on with their merry lives. There were some clunky dialogue about supremacy, but none of it really congealed. CACW Zemo would have agreed with the Flag Smashers’ fight against an organisation that was beyond accountability, TFATWS made him a baron who wanted to maintain the status quo, and then tried to tell us this guy is now an anti-hero…and I honestly have no comment about what we should be reading into that.

Bucky

The “I hold no grudge for what you thought you had to do” is top on my list of TFATWS lines that prove the scriptwriter believes Bucky is in the wrong for everything. I cannot find an adequate interpretation of this line that does not paint Bucky as the villain in their relationship, when it’s Zemo who did every. Damn. Hurtful. Thing to Bucky.

Bucky did nothing to Zemo. He did nothing to Zemo’s family. He was not involved in Sokovia. And he did not have agency when he was in Hydra. ZEMO KNOWS THIS BETTER THAN ANYONE BECAUSE HE HYPNOTISED BUCKY.

Zemo framed Bucky. Put his name and face on every damn newspaper in the world. Got him nearly killed by a SWAT team and a very angry T’Challa. He then hypnotised Bucky, made him relive what he was trying to run away from, demonstrated that he was still under his handler’s whim no matter how hard he fought, then set him onto Steve and the rest of the Avengers. He used Bucky to create the rift between Steve and Tony, and broke up the Avengers. Not only that, throughout TFATWS he continually stirs Bucky up, and tries to drive a wedge between Sam and Bucky by mocking his fighting abilities as a love for violence and talking incessantly about the untrustworthiness of super soldiers.

And yet, the script lets Zemo tell Bucky that he holds no grudge WTAF is that. I honestly hope whoever wrote that line gets bullied to shreds only to have the bully tell him “I won’t hold it against you”, because that’s what happened here.

I’m proud of Bucky not shooting him, because he didn’t play into Zemo’s hand, but I ain’t interpreting that as forgiveness.

#bucky barnes #helmut zemo #tfatws critical #asks

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duhragonball · 3 years ago

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What version of the Saiyan Tuffle War do you prefer: the Tufflew subjugated the Saiyans or the Saiyans just straight up obliterated the Tuffles

Between the two options, I think I prefer the first one, simply because all the Tuffle characters we've seen have been diabolical villains, and it sort of undermines them as bad guys if the Tuffles were innocent victims in the war. But that's just a personal preference.

I'm not suggesting that the Saiyans were all sweetness and light either. But it seems a little naive to have an advanced civilization just welcome a bunch of Saiyans onto their planet with no ulterior motives.

I say this because most of what we know about the Tuffles is based on Baby's appearances in Dragon Ball GT. Supposedly, Baby was created by the last survivors of the Tuffles, and they "infused" him with the genes of their king, whatever that means. Baby only had two objectives: to take revenge on the Saiyans, and to to convert or destroy all non-Tuffle life forms. And that's... pretty fucked up when you stop and think about it. Baby was such an over-the-top villain in GT that it was easy to just go along with whatever crazy shenanigans he was up to. But he was programmed by the Tuffles, and presumably the Tuffle King was totally on board with this. If he had lived to see Baby Vegeta ruling over the restored Tuffle Planet with the entire population of Earth infected with his nasty mind control eggs, the King would probably be pleased.

And yeah, the Tuffles would want revenge against the Saiyans, but what did Earth ever do to them? Or any of the other planets Baby menaced? You can make the argument that Baby was a doomsday weapon that went beyond the intentions of his creators, but I think he did exactly what the Tuffles wanted him to do.

And that begs the question: If Baby's reign of terror was the last gasp of the dying Tuffle species, then what sort of weird stuff were they up to before? I'll put some thoughts on this under the cut.

First off, I think it's kind of weird how there's not a clear picture of what a Tuffle is exactly. I went looking on the DB Wiki for some pictures and found this Tuffle design by Akira Toriyama.

That design prevailed in DBZ Episode 20, and also in Plan to Eradicate the Saiyans, when King Kai explains how the Tuffles welcomed the Saiyans to settle on their planet when they crashed there in a wrecked spaceship. The implication from Plan is that the Saiyans didn't just show up one day. They were refugees who needed help, and the Tuffles invited them with open arms.

But it's weird how the Tuffles in DBZ #20 are depicted as being much smaller than the Saiyans, but in Plan they're basically to scale with each other. Maybe that's a continuity glitch, and no big deal, but then you have Dr. Lychee, who looks like this:

He starts out as a regular-looking guy, and then he becomes this blue creature who looks a lot like a prototype for Baby. The blue form is supposed to be nothing more than one of the phantoms created by Hatchiyack in the OAV, like the phantom incarnations of Frieza, Turles, Cooler, and Slug. But those phantoms looked the same as the originals. Why does Lychee look so different? Is this a form that Tuffles can naturally assume?

Which brings me to Baby and his "Tuffle Parasites". By the end of his run in GT, Baby basically identified as a Tuffle, rather than a creation of the Tuffles. When he started infecting Earthlings with his eggs, he called them Tuffles too.

Then you've got Kamin and Oren from Super Dragon Ball Heroes. Apparently they're considered "Neo Machine Mutants", which are Tuffles modified become like Baby, for lack of a better explanation. I'm not sure if this was established in the DBGT days or not, but I guess the current lore is that Baby, Oren, and Kamin were natural Tuffles who were augmented into the form we see here.

I guess what I'm driving at here is that the Tuffles seem to have a very broad definition of what a Tuffle is. For them, it seems to be more about a way of thinking and feeling than any particular appearance or body plan. A machine can be a Tuffle. An Earthling infested with a parasite can be a Tuffle. So maybe those miniature humanoids in DBZ #20 were just one more variety of Tuffle.

I get a real transhumanist vibe from the Tuffles, particularly from the notion of archiving their King's DNA into Baby, and the way Dr. Lychee continued to exist as a "Ghost Warrior" after his natural death. Oh, and the Tuffles of Universe 6 augmented Kamin and Oren. That wasn't for revenge, by the way, they just wanted to see if they could do it, and apparently Kamin and Oren were outraged enough by this that they turned on their creators. Throughout the Dragon Ball franchise, the Tuffles are known for their advanced scientific knowledge, and also for making all these freaky creatures.

And maybe they weren't all evil. I wouldn't go that far. But I get the feeling that their leaders welcomed the Saiyans to their world because they saw a potential resource that they could exploit. Maybe they just wanted the Saiyans to pacify the uninhabited parts of their planet, or maybe they though the Saiyans could help them against other enemies. But maybe they saw the Saiyans as potential test subjects for their experiments. Just a thought.

I don't think the Tuffles necessarily subjugated the Saiyans, but it might have been more of a case of rising tensions. They lived in separate parts of the planet, with the Tuffles in the cities and the Saiyans in the wilderness, but the Saiyans grew more numerous, and the Tuffles probably saw that as a threat, and the Saiyans probably started to wonder why they needed the Tuffles at all. A lot of things might have instigated the war, but it wouldn't surprise me if the flashpoint involved Tuffles experimenting on Saiyan prisoners. If something like that came to light, then it would become a matter of survival. The Saiyans would have to wipe out the Tuffles to avoid being "Tuffleized" or worse. And the Tuffles would have to crush the Saiyans in battle to maintain control of the planet. There could be no return to the status quo; it would have to be total war until one side was completely defeated.

Once the war began, it must have taken a long time for the Saiyans to win. King Kai said that the lunar cycle on Planet Plant was eight years, and that each full moon allowed the Saiyans to gain ground in the war. So this implies that it took several full moons to end the war, so the conflict might have lasted decades, or maybe even a century. There might have been a few armistices or truces during that time, as each side would want to try to regroup and get as much momentum as possible before the next full moon. At least, that's how I'm picturing it.

One causus belli that sticks out in my mind is that the Tuffles were apparently a spacefaring people, but the Saiyans couldn't do much in space until they made contact with the Arcosians, and then King Cold's organization. So maybe the Tuffles were purposely keeping the Saiyans confined to Planet Plant, either to prevent them from escaping, or to isolate them from other civilizations. The Saiyans would take this poorly, I'm sure. So that might have a lot to do with it.

To be sure, the Saiyans of this era were real rat bastards, no doubt. I'm sure a lot of Tuffles of the time would make the argument that they were trying to contain the Saiyans as a matter of self-preservation, or even for the good of the greater universe. But I also suspect that the Tuffles aren't just friendly-looking anime folks. Creatures like Baby, Hatchiyack, Kamin, and Oren give us a peek into their more inhuman qualities, qualities that the Saiyans probably knew firsthand. It's possible that King Vegeta thought he was the one doing the universe a favor when he wiped the Tuffles out.

Something else to consider, in Episode of Bardock, we meet the Plantians, who were apparently the original inhabitants of Planet Plant. At some point, they were gone, and the Tuffles were living there instead, and then the Saiyans showed up and wiped out the Tuffles. So what happened to the Plantians? Did they just migrate to another world, leaving Plant empty for the Tuffles to move in? Or did the Tuffles do something to them? Food for thought.

#dragon ball #tuffles #i really ought to write some sort of fanfic about the saiyan-tuffle war #if only to crystallize my thought about it #i thought about using a tuffle villain in luffa but it seemed a little too obvious #like there was a whole war between saiyans and tuffles and that's where that conflict belongs #luffa's not part of that era so it shouldn't be part of her story #it'd make a good nanowrimo project if i ever finish the luffa thing #which... probably won't be for a while

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videogamesincolor · 3 years ago

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all these racist ass voice actors on twitter (cough laura bailey cough) coming out with hashtag black lives matter, after taking black characters' roles (cough nadine ross cough) + other coloured characters in video games for YEARS and then coming up with bullshit excuses and gaslighting fans when they called her out on it is just lmao.

(Jun 5, 2020 · a year ago)

"Coloured characters"?

I don't even recall Laura Bailey's specific reaction to George Floyd's murder. Searching it brings up the usual resigned, and angry statements about the incident, and how it should never happen again (topped off with a #BlackLivesMatter hashtag).

That said, it's not impossible for Bailey to feel aggrieved about Floyd, but maintain that there isn't an issue with (white actors) voicing Black and non-Black characters in the industry's current state. I think her commentary from 2016 about how she was hired as Nadine still remains relevant (x).

if folks were calling her out in June 2020 about her role as Nadine whilst she was expressing support for BLM, and she responded? I doubt it was going to change her mind. If anything, it simply might've entrenched her complicity.

Five years after the fact, games like Forspoken, and established discontent about Bailey's casting in U4 can only highlight why it was such an issue for people in the first place. It was avoidable, but the Naughty Dog did it anyway b/c it was what they wanted.

(Like, again, when there were Black characters in TLOU2, they hired Black actors.)

A lot of what happened in June 2020 with celebrities (large and small) was an expression of a lot of white guilt with nowhere to go (that or using the moment for media exploitation). The #BLM hashtags in descriptions and twitter usernames, temporary or persisting, are symptoms of that.

The moment in time where fewer than five voice actors vowed not to voice Black or Asian characters (on a show) anymore (1, 2, 3, 4) was, to me, akin to "we're renaming the Aunt Jemima syrup and Uncle Ben's rice".

It felt like an empty gesture. It didn't create visible change for Black and non-Black voice actors in the industry. There are still a lot of white voice actors comfortable with voicing characters of color.

They'll use the "well, they do it too!" argument to defend their choices, ignoring the behind-the-scenes problem that keeps the VA industry so white.

There are lot of agencies upholding the status quo, not interested in trying to support the sentiments that saw non-Black/Asian voice actors withdraw from roles that could've gone to Black and non-Black actors. Just those two fronts alone will create problems for people trying to change the landscape.

It makes those decisions feel arbitrary, if not completely performative (given how long it was before the actors realized "I'm befitting from and participating in a widespread problem"). Because, who beyond the creatives of the show supported their decisions?

(And all the same, why did it take something completely traumatizing like the recorded murder of a man to create even marginal change in people? I mean, I know why, but it's such a fucking depressing state of affairs.)

Developers like NetherRealm Studios, Deck Nine, and DONTNOD Entertainment certainly do their part to hire authentic voices for Black and non-Black characters (all while contradicting those decisions). The defunct Visceral Games (Dead Space) went one step further and often the face models for their non-white characters to voice said characters. The shift towards photorealism in games has certainly aided Black actors and voice actors a great deal as well.

Organizations like Game Devs of Color, Black Game Developers, and PoC In TTRPGs are certainly doing their part to aid underrepresented artists in the industry. It's obvious there are folks trying to change the things. It's not all doom-and-gloom, but there are just too many comfortable with the status quo.

Comfortable enough to attack said organizations for drawing attention to their specific issues, and at the same time, create spaces to solve it (not just talk about it like I do here on this blog).

It just reminds me of what discipleofbastet said back in 2016:

But if the mind set is: “Best person for the job, but white actors have a bias in their favor.” It won’t matter if diverse casts are in vogue. You could have an all black roster of characters, but still keep voice acting as white and biased as it currently is. (x)

Black and non-Black (voice) actors and fans have talked-to-death and resurrected their frustrations about how limited opportunities are in the VA industries for anyone who isn't a white actor with the privilege to become a voice everyone is tired of hearing (ah-la Nolan North, Steve Blum, Laura Bailey, Jen Hale, etc). They've empathized how important writing and directing plays into that as well.

(It what makes Troy Baker (IIRC) joking about it as he receives an award come off tone deaf or insensitive.)

2016 saw plenty of Back and forth about the subject, especially during the peak of the 2016-2017 vg voice actor strike, and during the release of U4ATE.

But just like in 2020, the industry sort've shrugged its shoulders, waited for the fervor to die down, and moved on. Fandom-at-large chose to remain ignorant about why the discussion of Black/Asian actors voicing Black/Asian characters was even an issue.

Pop culture websites keep headlining the idea that, "we're finally having a conversation about race in voice acting", but those most visible in the industry are avoiding or dismissing it.

[@ phillamarr: Anybody trying to create false equivalences about underrepresented minorities (POC, women) voicing majorities (white, males) in animation, keep my name the f--- out ya mouth]

That Phil Lamarr (who was also pretty vocal during the strike) had to preemptively warn people to keep his name out of their mouths when folk complained about Jenny Slate (Big Mouth), Kristen Bell (Central Park), and Alison Brie (Bojack Horseman) withdrawing from their roles, is a problem.

Laura Bailey, however aggrieved she was by Floyd's murder, is part of that issue based on her complicity with the status quo. I don't think her making the same choices as Bell, Slate, or Brie would've made much or a difference, honestly. But I know a lot of people would've appreciated it all the same.

#videogamesincolor #voice acting #black voice actors #phil lamarr #laura bailey #george flyod protests #media manipulation #voice actor strike #anon asks #lord jesus its a long post

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