#the younger me wants to see this series through. but current older me is noticing they're suffering just as much as me to see it like this

[normalest-of-knees]

Episode 8 and general Volume 9 discussion under the cut because... oof-

Tw: suicidal topics involving this episode and previous ones

Where exactly do we go from here? I'm serious. Where can this even go with 2 episodes left to this nonsensical volume?

Regardless of what RT actually does next episode, one way or another Ruby herself and (hopefully) everyone else will have to deal with the fact that she wanted to die, or at the very least, not be herself anymore.

Yes, Ascension is supposed to be different, but we also don't know anything about that. Ruby isn't from this world, so it may not even work, but we've also had unreliable sources (according to the show, anyways) as to what it actually is and does. We know the basics of how it's supposed to work, but not whether it's actually good or not

I had one crazy theory come to mind after the last 2 episodes, namely after we see Summer in Ruby's reflection in the storm.... and I cannot stress how much I hope this won't happen (but given how things have gone so far-):

I'm worried we may get a "Ruby turns into Summer Rose" or "Ruby was actually Summer all along" bullshit. It's just stupid enough to be something the writers would think is a "cool" "fun" "twist".

That aside, I must once again stress (I said this on a different blog) that everything feels like its going by at a break neck pace. So much is happening yet nothing is happening at all??

Ruby seemingly doesn't run very far away at all, enough that her team can hear the gunshots of her being attacked. She gets some weird spotlight beforehand that at first I thought was supposed to convey the passage of time as she walked, but I'm not really sure. She seemingly purposefully walks towards the mansion/casino/building Neo cooked up and we immediately are inside?? There's no transition to this. You'd be forgiven for thinking after she ran away that this bit was all a dream

Then even the parts with the dead menagerie attacking Ruby are odd. How does Neo know about half of this stuff? Is she guessing? Did she somehow find out via the lamp back when Cinder used it?? And as awful as it was for Ruby to be beaten and tortured like that, it was insanely short.

I know she was already beyond her limits, but they barely do much/say much before she's considering the tea. She had so much fire when she waltzed in there ("If you want me dead then come and get me!"), but a few illusions and her Aura is broken and she's ready to be done?? Again, I know she was already having a breakdown before, but it still felt too rushed to be natural. I know we saw bruises and a few cuts (and random blood on her hands?), but otherwise she wasn't visibly looking worse than some other fights she's been in before.

Also, why in the shit fuck did her friends just stand there and do nothing? You're telling me after someone dear and close to you freaks out, runs off, then you hear gunfire and rush to see what it is, then see her on the ground visibly upset and beaten up with the villain who has been hunting her down standing over her with their weapon out, you just..... stand there?? Waiting to see what's up?? There weren't even any copies or illusions around as well, it was just Neo and Ruby there.

Ruby just picks up the cup and drinks and Yang just.... stands there. Even the close up on her eye didn't have much emotion other than if she was watching a log tumble off a waterfall or something. Like barely anything aside from "Oh wow. Huh" going on....

And yeah, CC and Neo being the ones more upset over that than anything is.... a thing.

I don't care how the group interprets Ascension, you see your close friend, your SISTER, drink some unknown liquid and then falls over looking dead and gets swallowed up by a hole in the ground with vines, you'd have a reaction. You'd be panicking and running over to the spot. Freaking out! "Where'd they go?? What's going on??" Would be an understandable reaction.

But nothing. No one even moves an inch, they just watch, get blasted by a Cat, then it's over.

I thought at least Weiss would use her glyphs or something to charge at Neo or get to Ruby as fast as she could. Summon something to knock the cup out of her hand. Anything!! Why are they so.... apathetic about it? They're not even really horrified, they're just "Oh no... anyways." Like they saw someone slip and break something they were holding. Unfortunate, but oh well.

Don't even get me started on Yang's bitching earlier.

"Why'd she run off like that?!" "That wasn't upset that was-- ugh!! Why didn't she talk to us?!" "We weren't asking her to be perfect."

If you told me Yang hardly ever interacted with Ruby ever, let alone was her sister that 'supposedly' raised her, I'd believe you. The Hell kind of reaction is this when your sister runs away crying after expressing she wasn't doing ok?? Yes, Ruby brushed people off when they'd try to ask if she was ok, but even that is still an answer! Clearly she was not ok! And even when she'd be more vulnerable or sad, she was ignored or scolded for being sullen. How in the fuck was she supposed to open up?

I honestly don't know what is even gonna happen after this. 2 episodes left and the title character committed metaphorical suicide.

They'll either make it not matter, make her reset and forget everything, become someone else entirely, or nothing will change and she'll just have to be like "Yeah, so, my bad. Anyways, here's the exit guys"

This show makes me so tired....

[asmywhimseytakesme]

Awhile back I was blocked by someone who said that my depiction of Pheris in my Return of the Thief illustrations was ableist because I made him too young. This person claimed I was assuming he is younger and therefore less capable because of his disability, and that in the book he was clearly older than I depicted him, and therefore my depiction is ableist.

It’s totally cool for people to block me for whatever reason they believe warrants it, and to interpret a book differently where no absolute answer is given in the text. I do of course try not to be ableist in my depictions, especially for a character whose disability is such a large part of their story, so it did bother me… I did feel that Pheris was quite young in the book as I read it, however there was nothing to point to to say who was “right”.

I had forgotten this happened until yesterday when I started re-listening to the Return of the Thief audiobook after having a long break from the series.

It is very tricky when the author specifically avoids giving an actual figure for someone’s age, and I think that whatever age YOU think Pheris is is valid and I’m not trying to say you have to imagine a child where previously you didn’t. But I did find myself noting MANY hints that can support my reading of Pheris as being a fairly young/small child at the beginning of the book. Many of these are VERY open to interpretation, I just think they suggest together that you CAN assume from the text that Pheris is young/a child at this point in the story (regardless of his disability)—that is all.

I’m currently 16% through, so these examples come from only that section of the book.

Melisande calling him her “Little Pheris” (could just be an endearment but still worth noting)

The simple fact that Pheris was chosen to be raised in the palace because he is “young enough” to be raised away from the malignant tendencies of the Erondites clan. To me, this suggests pre-teen.

The fact that Pheris can crawl under the banquet table and MOVE AROUND without bumping people or being noticed.

In fact, he is constantly squeezing himself into very small spaces—under a couch when the king rushes into a side room to be sick, under a chair when avoiding the attention of attendants, between the hedges of the queens garden. Personally, I see a teenager having a much harder time doing this simply due to size.

Also during the incident where the king rushes into the side room, Pheris observes that he can see “nothing but the backside of the man ahead of me.” This suggests to me that Pheris standing is about butt-height to an adult. (I suppose you could interpret “backside” as referring simply to the back of a person… I generally read it as somebody’s butt though.)

When the king chooses Pheris as a companion to go with him into the temple, he observes that Pheris is “hardly even half of one.” I don’t read this as the king, a disabled man himself, suggesting that Pheris is half a person because of his disability. I think it merely suggests that Pheris is half as tall as most adults…a child.

That’s as far as I’ve gotten in my reading and I don’t know that I’ll keep noting these references to Pheris age/size. I’m not saying that the only way to interpret these passages is the way I do. I just feel like the text could be read to suggest that Pheris is a child and that this isn’t due to assuming him less capable and therefore young because of his disability.

Read it how you want though! I absolutely love that these books are open to interpretation and respect that readers will pay attention to the text and make their own inferences.

[girldragongizzard]

Chapter 5: Cop Out

Did you know that humans have instincts?

When I was growing up, and everyone thought I was a human boy, everything I read about instincts claimed that humans simply don’t have them. But as I got older and started thinking about things like gender, sexuality, and eating preferences, I started to see that this was wrong. And now, I’m pretty sure there are scientists that fully recognize that humans have instincts. It’s just that human instincts are buried and hidden under a gorgeous complexity of social interactions and conscious executive functions, and the ability humans have to just learn so much, and keep learning. But they’re still there.

Let’s take a look at a simple one.

Most human infants have an instinct to grip anything that’s placed in their palm. Previously, scientists would call that a reflex in humans, and a survival instinct in monkeys and other apes. Any other baby primate has got to hold onto their mother. But a human infant? Not so much. And it is a reflex. A simple reaction to stimulus. But it’s also an instinct. A bit of evolved behavior that didn’t hurt to have and at one time increased the chances of survival and continued reproduction.

And human adults still have that instinct. They use it in things like the design of bicycle brakes. By using a lever on the grip of the handlebars, humans have taken advantage of that gripping instinct to do the right thing in a moment of crisis without thinking about it much. If you get startled or see danger, you clench your fist, and clenching your fist is how you pull on the brake and stop the bike.

Now, I’m noticing that since my transformation, I’ve unlocked a whole bunch of draconic instincts. And the more complex ones, too. The ones that are a series of reflexes. A chain of if-then statements in my nervous system. I’m pretty sure it’s how I got through the day, how I made the correct assumption that Whitman was just challenging me for dominance (and probably why Whitman challenged me in the first place), and how I’ve so easily and even accidentally imitated basic sounds I’ve heard. I think it’s also why I can drink anything without drowning myself with this new anatomy. I just know how to use it. It’s certainly how I was able to breathe fire.

Humans have instincts that are that complex too, and I obviously had some of them when I was younger. Such as the instinct to learn language and figure out how to use a larynx and mouth to talk.

I’m pretty sure, at some point, I can eventually learn to talk again. I have all this language in my head. But I don’t seem to have the instincts to naturally apply all this linguistic knowledge I have to my new vocal apparatus.

And this is going to be a problem when talking to the police.

But I’ve got an even bigger problem right now.

Because, when Rhoda opens that door after speaking to the officer through it for as long as she felt she could, what I see there is not just a couple of police officers. I see a couple of competing predators that are not my own species.

And before I realize what I’m doing, I’ve already reared up and flapped my wings completely careless of Rhoda’s belongings. And I’ve made my favorite noise again. To human ears, I imagine it might sound like a muscle car trying to imitate an enraged parrot. If I took a deep breath and really pushed it, I think I could work an elephant into it as well. I might practice that.

And just like that, there are guns pointed at me.

“I thought you just wanted to talk,” Rhoda manages to say.

“Ma’am,” one of the cops utters, putting all of his intention into that word, nodding toward me.

His partner is grimacing and obviously trying to decide what to do.

These two people have been trained to fire at anything that is a clear and present danger to themselves. Which is currently me. And that training has got them to at least draw their weapons.

But – and I recognize this because a combination of my reading and my emotional instinct are kicking in – they’re being hit by a human reflex that’s been largely hidden for as long as anyone can remember. Though it’s made it into almost all the myths.

Well. Humans do have this reflex. As someone who had C-PTSD, I know it all too well. Sometimes humans freeze in the face of danger. Sometimes they fight. Sometimes they run. Sometimes they try to make nice, they fawn. And I think there are a couple of other reactions there, too.

But, when it comes to dragons, there is something deeper and more ancient and stronger that always results in freeze, apparently.

Because now that I’ve locked eyes with them, they can’t seem to budge or pull their trigger fingers.

The thing that sinks my heart is that when Rhoda turns to look, she gets caught up in the transfixation, too.

I can think about this, and I can make decisions still, but I’m learning something important and unfortunate at the same time. Because I’m on the other side of this, and I’m finding that it’s something of a two way street.

It’s as if I’m transfixed by them as well.

My body is swaying of its own accord from side to side, which causes my neck to snake a bit, and that pushes my head side to side ever so slightly. My head is swiveling to keep my gaze locked on the enemy’s eyes.

I’ve already noticed how much my attention is drawn to movement. Anything that moves within my vision vies for my center of focus. I don’t have to snap attention to it, but I want to. And if I look at something that’s moving, I see it more sharply and clearly. It’s easier to focus on it and see the details. And by my body doing this little dance, which I’m sure is part of what triggers the transfixion instinct in humans, I’m also having my movement tracking triggered as my targets parallax against the background despite otherwise being frozen.

And I’ve got two very strong urges, and it’s just like having my C-PTSD triggered. It’s all I can do not to follow one of the two of them. My whole body is tensing and coiling in anticipation of action on my part. And the longer that this lasts, the more intense the urgency is. It feels like a mix of fear and hunger.

If I were encountering these police in the wild and had recognized them as a threat there and gotten us into this same situation, I might have more options. I’d likely be able to take one of the two choices being presented to me by my instincts, and choose to retreat and take to the sky.

And I think the reason humans are frozen by a dragon’s stare is that half the time a dragon would just use that opportunity to leave. Maybe even more than half the time. Humans are pretty scary, actually. Especially when they have pointy things.

I’m terrified of those guns. I don’t think I’m impervious to projectiles like dragons in movies and stories, and a bullet is going to do some pretty shitty things to me, especially if it punctures one of my fire sacks, or whatever I should call them.

Flying would be risky, as once I get away from them the transfixion might be broken, and bullets can go pretty far. But it would be the more socially acceptable of the two options, and I can’t do it because I’m surrounded by walls and a ceiling. And I can’t turn to crawl out a window or I’ll break the transfixion.

Which leaves the other urge.

Pounce and eat.

I don’t want to be a people eater, but right now I want to.

And it doesn’t help that I’ve exerted myself a lot today, because that’s making me even hungrier.

But I’m a civilized dragon.

I’m not going to do it.

I’m not.

I’m not.

By the logic of this instinct and the urges it’s making me feel, Rhoda is now one of my targets, and I’m not going to do it.

I’m using my C-PTSD therapy to manage this. But it’s a tense situation that gets more tense with every second and every movement. Because I don’t know how long these people will remain frozen.

Remember that squeezing instinct humans have? That’s how you fire a gun.

Something about the transfixion prevented them from doing that, so far. And like so much of all of this, I don’t know how that works.

I slowly uncoil myself and move forward, snaking side to side even more as I go. And I watch as the guns track my chest.

Yeah.

They can move a little bit.

And they look so soft and vulnerable.

I lower myself as I get closer to them, which is dangerous because it’s another pouncing position, and I feel my butt wiggle back and forth like a cat calibrating a leap. And I visualize how that leap is going to go down.

But I keep moving slowly, armored head momentarily between those guns and my more vulnerable chest cavity, keeping my eyes on theirs the whole time. Which they can clearly see, because my head twitches with every movement to keep it that way.

And then I rise up right before them, almost between the guns, towering up until my horns brush the ceiling.

Oh, wow, I smell urine.

I’d take a deep breath to calm myself, but that smell is triggering my hunting reflexes something fierce and if I fill my nostrils with it I might lose control. So I hold my breath.

And I slowly, carefully place the palms of my foreclaws on the tops of the guns and push down steadily and glacierly with my whole weight.

I do what I can to grip the guns themselves with my claws, without nicking their hands. But without actually looking at them, because I don’t want to break eye contact, it’s hard. I think I do draw blood.

But I don’t hook their hands, just the guns, and that’s nice.

Neither of the officers have the strength to hold those guns up, and eventually my weight forces them to let go and stumble back a couple wobbly paces.

And now I’m standing on the guns.

And I’m close enough that I can only keep my eyes on the two police officers, and Rhoda is broken from the spell.

“Gentlemen, I think it would be a good idea for you to leave,” she says cautiously but firmly.

Now that I’ve secured their guns, I know I’m in less danger, so I force myself to tilt my head quizzically and then glance at Rhoda. But not at her eyes.

Then I look at the policemen in the chest.

That snaps them both out of it and they stumble further back into the hallway. But one of them looks longingly at his gun, while the other stammers and fixates on Rhoda.

“We’re going to have to call this in,” he says. “This is aggravated assault of a - “ And his eyes flick back to mine and his words trail off.

“You don’t have ordinances for dragons, do you?” Rhoda asks. “How does a dragon fit into your laws, anyway? Are they an animal or a person? I assure you, this one has a name and can talk if you let her use a tablet or my phone. You recognize that, don’t you?”

Both the officers look at her in confusion.

“We all see it,” she says. “Before you drew your guns on her, you were going to ask to see her ID, weren’t you? But this is all so new, there aren’t any laws about it. And maybe until there are, you should leave her alone.”

“We really did just want to ask some questions,” the one who was staring at his gun says.

“Dear?” Rhoda says to me. “Do you want to answer the questions that these fine gentlemen have for you?”

I kind of do. I want to make it clear to everyone that I was attacked in my own apartment by Whitman. And going on record as saying that seems like not a bad idea. But, on the other hand, it occurs to me that maybe I don’t want my former identity attached to my current state of being. Just in case certain laws do get crafted and passed. I don’t know what could happen, and I don’t want my own case to be used against me to take away my… human… rights.

Hm.

I’ve been close enough to activist circles, and I’ve been on social media for longer than a lot of kids have been alive. I know the wisdom. Don’t talk to cops.

It’s pretty easy for me to not talk to anybody, actually.

I shuffle back and kick their guns out to them. I don’t want to be responsible for those machines of death, and I’m sure neither does Rhoda. It’s also a gesture of trust, if somewhat foolish. I’m willing them to take it to mean that they should pick up their things and go, unharmed. And if they point them at me again, I might not be able to hold back this time. And I’m wagering that they think the same thing.

I watch them very, very intently as they hesitantly pick their weapons up again.

When they return the guns to their holsters, I turn and walk back into the apartment and start taking note of what I’ve knocked over.

“I think that means, ‘no��,” I hear Rhoda say, before closing the door. “Maybe come back with a warrant if you want to talk to me, and maybe the dragon won’t be here then. Thank you. I hope you have a very good day.”

I hear Rhoda’s cane thump on the floor as she moves up to my side, but I keep looking at the broken vase and upturned ficus.

“We can’t do that again,” she says, grimly. She sounds like she might be shaking. “I definitely can’t be doing that again. I hope they won’t be coming back, but you’ve got to find yourself a place to stay.” She puts her hand on my shoulder and adds, “I want to remain your friend and keep helping you. I’m not so worried about my things, but between dragon attacks and police visits, I just don’t know. I hope it’s rare. But, I don’t think this is a good place for you to live.”

I bow my head in solemn acknowledgement. I agree with her.

“Anyway, you can sleep here tonight,” she says. “We both need a good sleep, and while I don’t know if I feel safer with you here or gone, I can’t take that away from you. Your place ain’t fit for it, though. So you can stay.”

I look at her.

“Just, right in front of the front door, please. I have fewer breakable things there and if the police come back they’ll have to go through you.”

I give her a nice cat smile.

I really don’t know what I’m going to do, but a nice long nap is absolutely in order.

—

The next morning, I really have to use the bathroom first thing.

I’ve already figured out how to use the toilet with a cloaca and a tail and everything, but I really don’t want to do that to Rhoda’s bathroom, so that means wandering over to my apartment and using my own facilities. These apartments have pretty small bathrooms, which means I need every surface available in there to maneuver. And I’ve just basically emptied my bathroom of everything that’s moveable.

I could probably just go shit anywhere, and no one would know what to do about it. I can probably even do it on the fly, like a bird. But I don’t want to do that to people, or other animals. If I can use a toilet, I’m going to.

I’m a clever girl, I’ve got this.

Rhoda’s still asleep, so I let myself out. The doorknobs of this place are actual knobs, but they’re antique and textured, pretty easy to grip, even for me. I’d still prefer levers, but I’m practiced with these.

Except my door won’t open.

It’s locked.

There’s police tape across it.

I know that landlords, and the police, and the system are all ultimately to blame for my door being locked when I really need to use my own bathroom. But one thought enters my mind with a fiery fury, because there’s a reason it happened now.

I’m going to eat Whitman.

[nihilnothings]

I just recently noticed the similarities between Aqua and Akane's relationship to Hikaru and Ai

This isn't really a new profound theory as I found it on some obscure part of the Internet but I'd like to share some light on it because I just noticed it all of a sudden.

Ruby is usually the go to when people describe someone similar as Ai, after all she is a spitting image of her but blonde, has that similar charisma that draws in people to her, and eventually in traditional Hoshino fashion uses lies as a means to an end.

However, Ruby isn't the only one with similarities to Ai, Aqua too is also similar to his mother, at least when it comes to some aspect of his love life lol but even if they aren't physically similar Aqua too has similarities with his mother, in which they use lies as an expression of their love (The difference being Ai yearns for love while Aqua feels like he doesn't deserved to be loved) wouldn't be her son at all if they don't share anything in common after all!

The parallels so far are mostly on how their love lives are similar:

Both are entertainers who got entangled with Lala Lai Theatre Troupe members for a specific goal in mind

Eventually they started to get romantically involved with one another

They both then experienced a fallout for different reasons (Aqua can't bring himself to have Akane be involved for her safety while Ai started falling out due to the pregnancy, though further details might reveal more on their fallout because ain't no way it's just because of that)

They then started to oppose each other (Akane is actively planning to stop Aqua from self-destructing while REDACTED for reasons unknown went back to murdering again and killed his lover)

That's where the similarities end and where the differences start within this parallel.

In the case of Ai she was the older one, while in the case of Aqua he was the younger one lol (if we don't include his past life that is)

REDACTED opposes Ai but his motives are out of malice (unless Ai did something so bad to him that warrants murder and more murders following that, he is an evil piece of crap for ruining the lives of his children and many others), Akane opposes Aqua but her motives are pure, which is to save him from self-destructing (I personally don't think Akane wants Aqua to not chase after REDACTED as someone as smart as she is knows how dangerous he is, she's probably trying to stop him from destroying himself and find a much "healthier" way to stop him.)

The romance between Ai and REDACTED ended in a very bitter note to the point of Ai getting murdered by him. The fate of Aqua and Akane is still uncertain.

Aqua who is compared to "Ai" is the "bad guy" while Akane who is REDACTED is the "good guy" opposite to how REDACTED and Ai was, though further details of their relationship might shed more light on how they are.

Now the question stand, do these parallels mean anything? Maybe or maybe not, I just found the observation to pique my interest and considering I can't predict the current journey of the story, I'll leave all of this as me speculating.

If it were true though, I suppose these parallels are a way for the author to allude the trajectory of how their relationship might go. A lot of dark things are currently happening within the OnK-verse but I don't see this series to have a downer end, it'll probably be a light after dark ending where after all the shit that the characters have been through, they all will live knowing that they've won against their struggles.

Using this Tokyo Blade panel as a complement to this observation, I suppose if Ai and REDACTED's relationship concluded in a horrible note (but at least Ai managed to die knowing she was capable of "real love) then Aqua and Akane might succeed where their predecessors failed, by making amends and loving for real.

[pedroscurls]

Title: One Drunken Night (Part 3.)

CHAPTER TITLE: Joel Miller

Character(s): Joel Miller (pre-apocalypse, au) and Reader (third-person POV) Summary: After Joel meets Negan, he feels a sense of jealousy and protectiveness wash over him. Reader, on the other hand, continues to try and hide her feelings for Joel. Word Count: 2,428 Author's Note: So, this chapter is dedicated solely for Joel and Reader! I wanted to develop their friendship, especially since Reader already had a hot and steamy encounter with Negan. This is my first time writing for Joel, so please bear with me! Also, anything in italics are flashbacks! Warning: None.

Joel couldn’t get his mind off Y/N and Negan. He certainly didn’t know why Negan rubbed him the wrong way, but he tried so hard to push aside the lingering feelings of jealousy. He now had to wonder who Negan was to Y/N. He even noticed the effect Negan had on her and it frustrated him. Joel wanted to be the only one to make her feel that way. 

He had already gone to work, tuning Tommy out as his mind continued to drift.

“Joel? What’re you thinking about?” Tommy asked, waving his hands in front of his brother’s face.

“What? Nothin’. Let’s get back to work.” He mumbled, walking past Tommy before he heard her name leave his lips.

“You thinkin’ about her?”

“No,” Joel lied.

“Y’know, you’re a terrible liar.”

“Tommy, drop it.”

“You like her.” Tommy smirked. 

“Tommy, come on. Let’s not waste anymore time and just get back to work.” Joel was already walking away, trying to end the conversation. 

“Joel, wait up.” Tommy sighed, jogging to catch up to his older brother. “I’m serious, man. If you like her, just take her out. I mean, you do kinda already do that with y’alls coffee dates–”

“They’re not dates,” Joel interrupted.

Tommy chuckled. “All I’m saying… Dinner instead of coffee is pretty much the same thing.”

Joel shook his head, handing his younger brother a couple of tools. “Get back to work, Tommy.”

—

Y/N went to work, obviously distracted. She was a photographer and currently working at an art gallery. It wasn’t her dream job, but she was trying to have her own art show, wanting to display a series of photographs, but she hadn’t had any luck yet.

As she was walking through the gallery, admiring the various photographs, her mind drifted at the thought of Negan and Joel. She wasn’t expecting both men to meet and she certainly didn’t expect to see Negan again either. But what she couldn’t stop imagining was both men and she was sure she saw them sizing each other up. Y/N didn’t want to imagine things, but she could have sworn she saw a hint of jealousy on Joel’s features when Negan gave her his number and kissed her cheek goodbye.

When Negan left, Joel grumbled and sat back down. She didn’t even get a chance to ask what was wrong before Joel started talking.

“I don’t like him.” There was a scowl on his face. Y/N wondered what the issue was. Joel never had any problems with her seeing other men, but there was just something about Negan that made him jealous.

Maybe it was because Joel realized the other man, who was similar in age, managed to get Y/N. MAybe Joel did have a chance after all.

“You don’t even know him, Joel.”

“Do you?” He snapped. Joel sighed, trying to regain his composure. He immediately felt regret; he didn’t mean to take his annoyance and frustration out on her. “Listen–”

Y/N sighed. Joel did have a point. “No… No, I don’t. I didn’t think I’d see him again after last night. It was really just a one-time thing.”

Joel tightened his jaw. She confirmed exactly what he was thinking about. Now, he couldn’t help that his mind drifted to what she and Negan were doing last night, and it just angered him even more.

“You ain’t gotta explain yourself to me,” Joel said.

“But you just sound… Upset. Negan’s no different than the other men I’ve been with.” Y/N was confused. She didn’t expect Joel to act…

Jealous.

“He’s probably my age,” Joel pointed out.

“I do prefer older men.” Y/N confessed, replying too quickly. Her cheeks heated up, now a subtle tint of pink and she moved her eyes away from Joel in embarrassment. 

Joel was surprised. He certainly wasn’t expecting her to say that. As a response, Joel just nodded his head. He wasn’t sure what to say and was honestly afraid he would say something he wouldn’t be able to take back.

There was a tense-filled silence between them. Joel bit his lower lip, looking away from Y/N to look around the coffee shop. Y/N, on the other hand, ran her fingertips along the rim of her coffee cup, sighing quietly.

“What, Joel?” She asked, breaking the silence.

“Nothin’.”

“You’re lying. We both know that you’re a bad liar. If you have something to say, just say it.”

Joel shook his head, finishing the rest of his coffee.

“I gotta go to work. I’ll talk to you later?” he said abruptly, changing the subject.

Y/N sighed. “Right. Sure.”

Now, here she was at work, her mind drifting from Negan to Joel, and Joel to Negan. She sighed. She couldn’t concentrate. Instead, she grabbed her phone to call one of the men. She couldn’t stop thinking about this morning and it was hindering her from doing her job. 

Then, she heard his voice. So deep, husky, and with a hint of that southern drawl.

“Hi, darlin’.”

She sighed happily. “Can you come over tonight?”

“Everythin’ okay?”

“Yeah. I just– I didn’t like how we left things earlier. But if you have other plans–”

“I’ll be there.” Joel interrupted. “I can bring dinner.”

Y/N smiled. It almost felt like a date, but they have had dinner together before. Though, it usually always consisted of take-out and never truly going out to a fancy place. She didn’t mind though. She loved spending time with Joel.

“Okay, great. Can’t wait.”

“I’ll see ya later, darlin’.”

—

Joel continued throughout the day, trying to focus on the job while containing his excitement for seeing Y/N again later today. He cracked a smile to himself, thinking about her once more. He knew it wasn’t a date, but he was excited nonetheless. He sped through the last bit of his work, deciding not to take anymore breaks and Tommy took notice.

“You eager to get home or what?”

“Somethin’ like that. I’ve got dinner plans.” Joel replied. “So I at least wanna get home to clean up.”

Tommy grinned. “Well then cowboy, get on home then. I can handle the rest. We’re almost finished anyway.”

“You sure?”

“Yep. Go have fun.”

Joel nodded, clasping a hand over her younger brother’s shoulder and giving it a tight squeeze. He then moved to his car and started making his way back home. While the excitement was there, Joel’s thoughts lingered from Negan and Y/N and how their night went last night. It was nagging at him, thinking about Negan being with her. What they did, what they talked about… How he saw her, touched her… Joel couldn’t stop thinking about it.

By the time Joel got home, his mind was all over the place. He did his best to calm himself down, taking a much needed shower and changing into something more presentable. He dressed in dark jeans and a denim button up, tucking it into his pants and pulling on his belt. He then folded his sleeves to his elbows, running a hand over his face. With a hesitant sigh, Joel grabbed his keys and made his way to Y/N apartment, deciding to stop for burgers on the way. 

Once he got there, he knocked twice before Y/N swung open the door. She was dressed in lounge pants and a white tank top with a dark colored cardigan over. She looked comfy and inviting and warm and Joel’s thoughts about her and Negan immediately disappeared at the sight of her. 

Y/N looked at him with kind eyes everytime. It made Joel feel special and not like he was some disappointment. When Y/N looked at him, Joel always felt seen in a way where it made him want to become a better man. For her.

“Got us burgers.” Joel smiled, lifting the bag up in her direction.

“Mm, yum. Come in, come in.” 

Joel stepped inside, removing his boots and following her into the kitchen. He watched her rummage through her cupboard to grab two glasses to fill with water. Then, she turned to him and held up a bottle of whiskey, wiggling her brows which caused a quiet chuckle to escape his lips.

“You tryin’ to get me drunk?” Joel asked teasingly.

“Psh. We both know I would be the first one to get drunk.”

He smiled. “Yeah, you’re right. Ever since I met ya, you’ve always been a lightweight.”

Y/N giggled, shaking her head and grabbing two smaller glasses for their alcohol. “But I’m a cheap date.”

Joel bit his lower lip, hooking his thumb into his pocket as he looked at her with amusement. He couldn’t take his eyes off her. He didn’t respond, but instead took their food out of the bag to set on the counter. He turned around, bumping into her as their bodies were mere inches from each other.

“Oh! I’m sorry,” she whispered.

Joel bit his lower lip, taking a step back. “Clumsy little thing, ain’t ya?” 

Y/N rolled her eyes. “That is no secret.” She smiled. “It is how we met after all.”

—

One year ago

Y/N was walking into work, her eyes focused on the papers in her hands. She had a deadline to meet and she had to ensure that the upcoming art show would be successful. She was staring at her to-do list, finding herself becoming more and more anxious and overwhelmed with the amount of things she needed to do. 

It wasn’t until she bumped into a very strong man that she realized she wasn’t looking where she was going. Her papers fell to the floor and she immediately dropped to her knees to pick it up in a rush. 

It wasn’t until she heard his voice that she was taken out of her reverie and back to reality. She looked up at him, seeing him help her gather her things. 

“Sorry ‘bout that,” he said. 

Y/N bit her lower lip, their eyes meeting. “Not your fault. I wasn’t watching where I was going.”

Joel shrugged, standing with her. He was significantly taller than her, but the first thing he noticed were big eyes, staring into him like he was the only person in the room. It captivated him in a way that he had never felt before.

“Looks like you’ve got your hands full. Let me help ya.” He offered, nodding for her to lead the way.

“Oh, are you sure?”

Joel gave a quick nod. “Lead the way, darlin’.”

Y/N blushed at the pet name, quickly walking ahead of him so that he wouldn’t see the blush rising in her cheeks. Once at her desk, she set her stack of papers down and watched as Joel set the rest down for her. 

“Thank you,” she said, looking back up at him.

There were those eyes again.

“Not a problem.”

“I’m Y/N.”

Joel bit his lower lip, glancing over his shoulder at Tommy who was speaking with the owner of the building. “Joel,” he replied. “I’ll see ya ‘round.”

“Um, wait up,” she called, making him stop in his tracks. “Are you the one who’s going to make some changes to the building?”

He nodded. “That’d be me.”

“Then I guess we’ll have more meetings,” she said.

“Oh?”

“My boss put me in charge of making sure that you finish the job in time.”

Joel flashed her a smile. “Then I’m looking forward to the next time we meet.”

Since then, Joel and Y/N developed a friendship. Even when his job finished, they both went out their way to still be in communication. 

—

After their dinner, Joel and Y/N moved to the living room. She was facing him, her legs tucked underneath her as she held onto her second glass of whiskey. Joel was facing the television, glancing to the side as she rested her head against the back of her couch. She was smiling in his direction and Joel bit his lower lip to contain his feelings. 

“Whatcha starin’ at?” Joel asked.

“You.”

“I got somethin’ on my face?” He replied, running a hand over his face.

“No.”

“Then what?”

“Nothing. Can we– Can we talk about earlier?”

Joel sighed. “I’m sorry for snappin’ at ya, darlin’. That Negan fella just– I don’t know.”

“Are you upset that I slept with him?”

There it was. Another confirmation that Y/N had been with Negan. It pained him and felt like someone had knocked the wind out of him. 

“Why would I be upset?”

Y/N shrugged. Maybe she was imagining it after all. “I don’t know. It just– It just seemed like it.”

“I just don’t want to see ya hurt.” Joel said, sighing quietly to himself. “You deserve a good man.”

“And what if Negan’s a good man?”

“And what if he isn’t?”

Y/N sighed. “I just– I got stood up last night and then I met Negan at the bar. We got to talking about basketball. He was funny, charming…”

“Okay, okay,” Joel said, waving a hand in the air. “It’s fine, darlin’. I just want ya to be careful, that’s all.”

Y/N looked away from him, glancing down at her glass instead. It just felt like there was this unspoken feeling between the both of them and neither Joel or Y/N wanted to say it. 

“I’m okay,” she replied. “I promise.”

Joel reached over, resting a hand over her forearm that was resting on the back of her couch. She looked down at his touch, biting her lower lip as she felt him run his thumb along the fabric of her cardigan. His touch left her wanting more, giving her goosebumps and butterflies in her stomach. 

Joel downed his drink and set it down on the coffee table, turning his body to face hers. She looked at him, staring into his eyes once more. He felt weak, captivated by her eyes boring into her. Maybe it was the alcohol or the fact that Negan just ignited a fire under his ass to make a move, but Joel mustered up the confidence to finally ask her the one question he had been wanting to ask.

“Can I– Can I take you out on a proper date?”

Y/N widened her eyes. It was actually happening. She bit her lower lip and wanted nothing more than to just skip the date and kiss him, but instead, she smiled. 

“I’ve been waiting for you to ask.”

---

Part 4.

Taglist (let me know if you want to be tagged!): @kaitebugg03, @a-girl-interupted​, @igotbasicdrag​​

[alarrytale]

Do you think HW will change anytime soon? It's been long established that queer people are drawn to working in film, tv and theatre. Like you said, it has a higher rate of queers than the rest of society. But there still aren't many people who have CO. I noticed that out of the ones who have CO not many of them have public same sex relationships. The ones who CO as bisexual usually publicly stick to the opposite sex, and the ones who CO as gay usually stay publicly single, apart from a couple of people. Which makes me think that even if a celebrity is to CO then it's still a HW taboo to parade around with their same sex partner and take them to events. Are things moving forward? In some ways they are because more people are CO and being accepted but there's not many same sex couples, even with those who have CO. It's pretty rare. More HW stars, particularly the older ones, going into lavender marriages makes me so sad. I don't think we'll get any of the established HW stars CO unless it's at the end of their career. We stand better chance with the younger ones but sadly it seems like many are following in their footsteps. It would be great to have an out famous couple like Harry and Louis to pave the way for others and show how it's done. Someone needs to get the ball rolling. It would change everything. Maybe that's why the industry doesn't want them to CO. They don't want change and they want to keep it under control.

Hi, anon!

Things are moving forward! It's just slow going. Conservatives are still a large target group, as are cis straight men. The the film business money is currently being made in franchise superhero/actionhero movies where being queer and out will give you a disadvantage. Both with the casting crew, promoters and the target audience, unfortunatly. There are other movies and tv series being made now, that's not overshadowed by the cinematic universes, with out queer actors. There was also a lavender marriage break up yesterday (announced late on a friday, if you get what i'm putting down). So it's getting better!

In music it's a bit better than film, but it's only in the recent years we've seen up and coming artist have managed to compete and stay at their fame level while being out or coming out. I wish more people would come out too, to get the ball rolling as you say, it would make such a huge difference. I wish the same for sports.

I agree the chances are bigger with younger ones, because they have more support in family, friends and the gp than the generations before them had. The environment is better for them, but the competition, market and target audience still plays a part in the decision of being publicly out. Some people thrive and are better performers for being able to be out, and they don't mind that some people might not approve or that it might place limits on opportunities. Others want the same opportunities and respect that straights enjoy and thus keeps their sexuality under wraps. Someone got to be brave and bold enough to go first in order to get out of this vicious circle. The more that follows after, the more you normalise it. It's through normalisation you slowly change things. Seeing a queer character in a tv show is to be expected now. You don’t see anyone making a fuss about it now, other than a select few. That's because it's become normalised.

So we are moving forward, it's just slow going.

[dancingcapybaras]

currently reading Dumb Witness by Agatha Christie! here are my current thoughts in a nutshell:

it’s kind of giving conservative grandma??

like, yeah, this was written in the 30s; pretty self explanatory.

i really like christie’s storytelling, i do. it’s just this book feels like her shading on the younger generation for,, idk, not being traditional or something?? which really does feel like something every younger generation faces (times really don’t change)

for the last 12 chapters i read, im just being constantly reminded about how emily arundell’s niece married a Greek doctor and how dreadful it is. like my bad, sorry this dude isn’t ENGLISH ENOUGH FOR YOU?? yall are just jealous they got good food okay

and let’s not forget there’s a slur in the book💀

literal jumpscare when i opened the table of contents.

but then again, just looking at my older copy of And Then There Were None makes me wonder why i’m surprised

UPDATE: Just finished the book! i’m surprised i got through it that quickly. anyways, here are my thoughts!

i thought the plot was interesting. i thought it was pretty cool how upfront everyone was abt how they wanted emily’s money since it shows that none of them can be completely trusted.

like everyone was after the same thing, for different reasons, but only ONE of them actually committed to it.

and let’s not forget the constant reminder of good old “english-breeding.” it’s not said a lot, but it’s something i notice popping up in the book from time to time.

like goodness gracious woman, please stop. describing others as “well bred” makes them sound like a horse freshly groomed

anyways, i think this is the first time i got introduced to hastings? i didn’t even know he was a reoccurring character and a friend of poirot since i’ve only read Murder on the Orient Express and And Then There Were None.

so you can imagine my confusion when i skimmed through random pages and noticed it was from someone else’s perspective.

but their dynamic is pretty cool! i kind of see it as like poirot doing his usual detective stuff and it going like:

poirot, lying to get some answers:

hastings: you are crazy, y’know that?

poirot: not crazy enough to kill, though!

well that’s how i see it anyways. i do think it’s cool that seeing through the lens of hastings does make things more fun. like this silly guy is as clueless as me

and he kind of vocalizes the audience? kind of? that’s how i saw it during the times he tried convincing poirot that the ball incident was genuine

but yeah it was okay. i might read the first book of the series because i just found out poirot is a refugee or smth?? like i need to know what’s up with that

so yeah, that’s my thoughts!

[chezzywezzy]

Yandere Jasper Hale (1/10)

Word count ; 3.9k

*Dedicated to @plumes-de-nuit. This'll definitely be the longest series yet. I... didn't realize I loved him so much.

*Also : R & Jacob & other love interests are 18. Jasper… y’all already know he ain’t a teenager.

*Edited:3

I stared out of the car window, watching as the trees passed by. Bella was beside me, and we were currently riding in dad’s police car. He’d picked us up from the airport, as we were moving here for our last few years - or, for me, a year - of high school. While Bella pitched the idea, I jumped in on it. I was eager to see the world, even if it was just Forks, after all these years. I had grown bored of Phoenix. Not just the weather, but the boys. There were no cute boys that I hadn’t already gotten or attempted to get with. 

I also really wanted - no, needed to catch a break from mom’s strict rules. She thought I was a troublemaker just because I went out a lot and occasionally got detention.

Oh, and I’d literally follow my dearest sister to the ends of the earth. But I’d never tell her that.

It was already raining. I knew that Bella hated the rain, but I loved the new scenery. 

Charlie pulled into the front lawn of a pretty standard house. It was white and green and is a two-story. I knew that it probably had a basement, though. In Phoenix, we had a flat one-story home surrounded by cactuses. I hated the weather, but I’d developed a darker tan for my s/c.

I stepped out of the back and raised my hands up the air. “Woohoo! Glad to be home.”

Charlie sent me a smile, appreciating the enthusiasm. Other people would see this scene as awkward, but that’s just how the family was. Bella was like dad, demure and introverted. And I was like mom, outgoing and extroverted.

Charlie insisted that he'd get our bags for us. I enjoyed the help, since I had a pretty hefty suitcase. Not to mention, I had a large backpack already strapped to my chest. Dad led us inside, allowing us to kick our shoes off, before showing us our rooms. 

He must’ve been going off what he knew of us when we were younger, because I knew without a doubt that Bella’s favorite color was green. However, her room was themed purple. Mine, though, was perfect. I loved pink as a kid, and I loved pink now. Was just about to get settled in when Bella hovered in the doorway.

“Hey, some people are out front. Charlie’s calling us.”

I blinked in confusion, but trailed behind her. I was already starting to get comfy, throwing my clothes all over the room. However, I knew dad was a straight-to-the-point kind of guy. As Bella commented on the plane, 'One of the best things about Charlie - he doesn’t hover.’ It was odd wording, but I knew exactly what she meant.

As we exited through the front door, I threw an arm around Bella’s shoulders. Sitting by the side of the road was a rustic red truck. I could already tell Bella was eyeing it enviously. Yet, my attention was more fixated on an older man in a wheelchair and a former childhood friend who I recognized instantly. Jacob.

We made eye contact, and I immediately sent him a smile. He smiled back. I noticed how he��d grown his hair out and he was a lot more mature than he was a few years ago. 

Charlie waved us closer. “Bella, Y/n, you two remember Billy Black.”

“Yeah!” I exclaimed, dashing forward to shake his hand. Bella seconded my statement, although in a much chill-er way. 

“Wow, you’re looking good,” Bella commented.

“Well, I’m still dancing,” Billy replied with a chuckle. “I’m glad you’re both finally here. Charlie, here, hasn’t shut up about it since you told him you were coming.”

“All right, keep exaggerating. I’ll roll you into the mud,” Charlie muttered playfully.

Charlie took a few steps away, but Billy began wheeling after him. “After I ram you in the ankles!”

“You want to go?” Charlie bickered, and as they eased around, it left Bella and I with a chance to greet Jake. 

“Jake! It’s been forever,” I cheered, pumping my fist into the air. His grin widened even further, and I opened my arms to welcome into a hug. He took it, quickly hugging, while Bella watched in amusement.

“Glad to see you’re just as energetic as ever,” Jake laughed. “How do you do it?”

“Lots and lots of coffee. And, of course, Bella’s here, too. Bella, you remember Jake, right? Or were you too tiny?”

Bella slapped my arm playfully. “You’re only a year older than me, geez. Yeah, I remember you, Jake. It’s great to see you again.”

Jake nodded to her. “Yeah, uh, we used to make mud pies when we were little.”

“Gross,” I commented. 

Bella shook her head. “You weren’t as cool as Jake and I were. Eating mud is, uh, definitely a healthy past time.”

I crossed my arms, pouting playfully.  “I just have etiquette. I am the eldest out of you two, after all.”

Jacob looked at me incredulously. “By a few months.”

Bella tilted her head over to Charlie and Billy’s antics. “Are they, uh, always like this?”

Jake bared his teeth while nodding. “It’s getting worse with old age.”

Billy and Charlie finally joined us again. Charlie patted the truck. “So, what do you think?”

“Of what?” Bella asked in confusion. I stood behind her and wrapped my arms around her shoulder, peering at Charlie with equal bafflement.

“Your homecoming present.”

Bella’s jaw dropped. “This?”

Charlie shrugged. “Just bought it off Billy here.”

“Yep!” Billy seconded.

Bella detached to me, and we both went to hug the car. “Oh, my god!” I exclaimed.

“I totally rebuilt the engine for you,” Jake spoke up.

Bella was gasping for breath, and she hopped into the truck. “Come on, seriously? This - this is so cool! Oh my gosh!”

“This so-o-o perfect —“

“Actually,” Charlie interrupted, "your mom gave me a head’s up that you’re a reckless driver. This is Bella’s homecoming gift. Your’s is still inside.”

My jaw dropped. “Wh a-a-at? You’re kidding me! I’m the best driver in the world!” I huffed leaning against the car.

Charlie shook his head, chuckling. “Your mom informed me of how you had to retake your driver’s test more than two times. I’m sure you’ll enjoy your present inside a lot more. Besides, I’m sure Bella can drive you where you need to go.”

Jacob weaved around the front, laughing at my repugnance, and hopped in beside Bella to show her the works. I was left pouting while Billy and Charlie talked. I was only a little insulted that I wasn’t trustworthy enough to sit behind the wheel, but fair enough. I’d be satisfied as long as my gift was just as cool.

“I told you they’d love it,” Billy joked. 

To be fair, though, I knew that Bella really loved cars. She’s loved them ever since we were kids. While I wanted to be a princess, she wanted to be a race car driver. Of course, both of our ambitions had changed, and now she planned on being a mechanic.

“I’m down with the kids!” Billy added, motioning ‘coolly.’

“Oh yeah, dude. You’re the bomb.” I snickered quietly at dad’s sarcasm.

I leaned into the open window when the car started up. “…Do you want a ride to school or something?” Bella inquired. I also wanted to know the answer.

“Oh, I go to school on the reservation,” Jake answered.

I pouted while Bella sighed, "Right, right. That’s too bad. It would’ve been nice to know one person.”

“You’ll be fine, Bella. I bet you’ll be friends with half the school by the end of first period,” I spoke up.

Bella laughed. “I’m pretty sure that’s you you’re talking about.”

I tilted my head innocently. “Oh, is it? I must’ve forgot.”

~~~

Bella and I hopped out of our new car. Technically her’s, since dad bought me a cool gaming console, but we’re sisters so I’d undoubtedly steal it from time to time. Luckily, the school year was just starting, so we couldn’t have stood out too much. Well, except for the fact that our truck was bright red. And my clothes were equally flashy. I loved being the center of attention, although I knew Bella loathed it. Somehow I wondered how we came out of the same vagina.

Bella and I walked side by side into the school. The weather was dreary and dismal, just how I liked it. We pulled out our respective schedules. Bella had been responsible and circled her’s, while I was only vaguely aware of what classes I’d signed up for.

Suddenly, a black haired, Asian student who was well dressed saddled up beside Bella. I dropped the schedule to my side, waving eagerly. “Hello!”

Bella jumped, meeting the boy’s gaze. “You two are the Swan sisters. The new girls,” he greeted. “Hi, I’m Eric, the eyes and ears of this place. Which of you is Isabelle and Y/n?”

“Bella, actually,” Bella tittered. “This is Y/n.”

I waved again, and the guy grinned charismatically. “Nice to meet you, Eric.”

“Anything you guys need? Tour guide, lunch date, shoulder to cry on?”

I could tell Bella was petrified. She could barely release coherent words from her lips. However, she needed to learn how to be socially inept. “Uh, I’m really kind of the more suffer-in-silence type. Y/n’s the one you should be asking.”

His gaze flitted over to me, and I switched hands, wrapping an arm around Bella. “Don’t mind her. She’s shy. A lunch date sounds great. Right, Bella?”

Bella nodded anxiously. Eric continued, not noticing her discomfort. “Good new for your feature. I’m on the paper, and you’re news, babies, front page. The title can be something freaky, like ‘opposites attract in the womb.’”

Bella looked utterly mortified. She halted in her steps. “Uh, no we’re not. I’m not. You… Please don’t have any sort of…”

“Woah, woah, chillax.” Eric waved his arm dismissively. “No feature. Unless you, Y/n, want one.”

I shook my head. “Nah, I’ll pass. It would be rather difficult to write an article and not mention my other half.”

“Cool, cool. Anyways, I’ll be off. See you two at lunch!” Eric really was off. He disappeared into the flood of people immediately, leaving me to Bella. 

She exhaled anxiously and I patted her back before looking at my schedule. “P.E. What a grand start to my week.”

“Oh, thank god,” she sighed. “Me too. At least we share one class.”

I chuckled, grabbing her arm. “Let’s get going, then. I can’t wait to meet new people. Eric’s cool, but we - more so, you - need some gal pals.”

Bella sighed, allowing me to drag her off to P.E. I knew I wasn’t the best at sports, but Bella - she was god awful. I knew she’d make a few friends from just being an athletic train wreck. As much as I loved her, she was way too perfect. Athletics was certainly her downfall.

We walked into the gym and changed quickly. The uniform was cute, a quaint tank top and shorts. Bella specifically brought sweat pants from home, as I knew she had some body insecurities. I, though, was more than glad to show some leg.

We walked out, still attached to each other’s side. I immediately waved to two girls who were playing volleyball. They waved back, motioning for us to join their team. Class hadn’t started, but the students were clearly basking in the new school year energy. The pair of girls had just been playing, but we separated into teams after a brief introduction. Needless to say, it was Bella and I against Sabrina and Jules.

“Bella, get it!” I called, too far away to get the ball. I was carrying the team, pretty much two against one, while Bella lingered behind me. 

She punched the ball, sending it into the net. I sighed, going to pick it up, while Sabrina and Jules said they were going to use the bathroom. That was code for them waiting a different partner. We waved them off. I picked up the ball and started making my way to Bella. Suddenly, a volleyball came flying past me and collided with Bella’s face.

Out of instinct, I burst into laughter, dropping our ball.

“Whoa!” a boy with dirty blonde hair exclaimed, running over to us.

Bella recovered, having caught the ball after it hit her face. She sent me a glare and threw it back at me, but I caught it, sending her a coy grin.

We both turned to the boy. He was slightly taller than both of us, and from his garb, he was probably on the school’s basketball team. “I’m so sorry about that,” he apologized, rubbing the back of his neck. “Basketball’s more of my forte, not volleyball.”

Bella stuttered, waving dismissively. I interrupted, "To translate, she means it’s fine. I’m Y/n, she’s Bella.”

“Yeah, hey, I’m Mike Newton.” He held out his hand for me to shake, which I accepted. I sent him a wink, mesmerizing him further. Bella clicked her tongue, coming up behind her and placing her forehead on my shoulder.

“More like Mike Haw —“ 

I was interrupted by a girl with light brown hair, hung in a pony tail. She skipped over to us, standing beside Mike. “He’s got a great spike, huh? I’m Jessica, by the way. Hey, you two are from Arizona, right?”

“Jessica, hi! You’re so pretty,” I answered, sending her a smile. “Yeah, we are.”

“Aren’t people from Arizona supposed to be, like, really tan?” She quickly corrected herself. “No offense, though, Bella.”

“None taken. Uh, yeah. Maybe that’s why they kicked me out. Y/n, uh, definitely got out more than I did.”

Both Mike and Jessica laughed, and I couldn’t help but snicker. Mike pointed while stating, "You’re good.”

“That’s so funny,” Jessica chimed in.

Bella held up her hands, waving, as she backed away. “Uh, nice to meet you. Y/n’s planning to teach my volleyball, now so…”

“Right. See you around, Arizona,” Mike directed, more so at me.

“Right back at you, Washington and Jessica!” I winked and let Bella drag me off the a more deserted area of the gym.

“They seemed nice,” I commented optimistically.

“…Sure. But boy, are people scary.”

“Girl, get used to it. I’ll indoctrinate you into my way of life whether you want to or not.”

~~~

“It’s my pleasure, madam,” Mike suavely eclair, having taken my tray for me. Bella trailed behind me, quiet and demure as always. Bell plopped down next to Jessica, while I situated myself between Mike and Eric due to unfortunate seating arrangements. Eric was previously droning on about some project, and our appearances interrupted the conversation.

“Hey, Mikey, you met my homegirl, Y/n, eh?”

I quirked a brow, while Bella waved to the girls.

“Oh, your girl, eh?” Mike hummed.

A laugh bubbled in my throat, but in that moment, a boy appeared beside me and planted a kiss on my cheek. I gasped as he declared, 'my girl,’ before dashing away. A blush rose to my cheeks, and Bella looked more than happy to not be in my situation.

Mike’s chair was pulled from under him and I covered my mouth in surprise. “Sorry I had to mess up your game, Mike!” he shouted as he disappeared amongst the other students. Mike took off after him, leaving me mentally exhausted.

“Oh-h-h my god,” Jessica gasped. “It’s like first grade all over again. You’re the shiny new toy.”

I clicked my tongue. “It’s shocking Bella isn’t getting the attention. I mean, just look at her! Absolutely stunning. Plus, she’s got brains.”

Bella laughed, waving dismissively. Suddenly, an Asian girl with glasses and her hair done up in a pony tail leaned across the table with a camera. “Smile!”

I was caught off guard, but grinned anyways and gave a peace sign. Bella shrank away instantly, making me lose focus since it made me laugh. The girl shrunk away, muttering out an apology. However, her gorgeous smile didn’t fade.

“I needed a candid for the feature,” she explained, plopping in her seat.

“The feature’s dead, Angelia,” Eric sneered, rather hardly. I quirked a brow. Eric rose to his feet and grabbed my shoulders, leaning over. “I got your back baby.”

I was glad that it was just us girls left and Eric went off to do whatever the hell he wanted. “It’s fine…? I’m starting to think all the guys at this school are crazy,” I chuckled.

Angela scoffed. “I guess we’ll just run another editorial on teen drinking.”

Bella spoke up, clearly feeling bad for causing drama. “You know, you can always go for… eating disorders. Or speedo padding on the swim team.”

“I vote the latter,” I eagerly remarked. I slid down the bench and took my rightful place beside Bella, now that the boys had disappeared.

“Yeah. Actually, that’s a good one,” Angela agreed.

“Kirk, right? That’s exactly what I thought,” Jessica gossiped. “We’re talking Olympic size.”

“There’s no way. He’s so skinny. It doesn’t make sense.”

“I mean, how big are his hands? You know what they say about big hands,” I teased.

The girls laughed, but I noticed that Bella’s attention was strewn elsewhere. I followed her gaze, seeing that a cliche of incredibly pale and insanely good-looking people walked into the cafeteria. I noticed that Bella was most focused on the latter, the one that wasn’t paired up. There was a blonde and black haired couple holding hands, an awkward guy and a hippy and slash or tomboy bickering, and the last was silent, seemingly just as fixated on Bella.

“Who are they?” Bella spoke up, nodding to them.

“The Cullens,” Angela answered.

“They’re Doctor and Missus Cullen’s foster kids,” Jessica continued in a hushed tone. “They moved down here from Alaska, like, a few years ago. They kind of keep to themselves.”

“Yeah, ‘cause they’re all together. Like, together-together.”

“The blonde girl, that’s Rosalie, and the big dark-haired guy, Emmet, they’re, like, a thing. I’m not even sure that’s legal.”

“Jess! They’re not actually related.”

“Yeah, but they live together! It’s so weird. They’re legally family. And, okay. The little dark-haired girl is Alice. She and Jasper, the guy who looks like he’s in pain, aren’t actually together. Apparently, Jasper has some anxiety problem or something.” I glanced back at them, noticing that even with how stoic Jasper looked, he was quite attractive. “Um, Doctor Cullen’s like this foster dad slash matchmaker.”

“Maybe he’ll adopt me,” Angela sighed dreamily.

However, that information wasn’t enough to satiate Bella. Her eyes were glued to the final assumed family member. “Who’s he?” Bella asked.

“That’s Edward Cullen. He’s totally gorgeous, obviously, just like Jasper, but apparently, like Jasper, nobody in this school’s good enough for him.” Jessica snickered dryly. “Like I care, you know? So… yeah. Seriously, though, Bella, Y/n. Don’t waste your time.”

“Wasn’t planning on it,” Bella chided.

“Well, I might. That Jasper fella’s pretty cute for a, and I quote, 'guy who looks like he’s in pain.’” Angela snorted, and I followed Bella’s gaze. I peered over my shoulder, seeing that her and Edward were making intense eye contact. 

I couldn’t help but stare, and Jasper glanced over at us. I sent a smile, holding up my hand and waving. I noticed his mouth twitch before Alice stole his attention away. I returned my attention to the table to see that Jessica and Angela were both looking at me.

“Don’t tell me you just waved at him,” Jessica gasped. “You’re seriously wasting your time. You know that, right? What, are the guys falling at your feet not good enough?”

Bella clicked her tongue, and Angela teasingly followed up, "You’re totally a player.”

“Wha-a-at? No. I’m just friendly,” I chimed. “Besides, I’m not interested in guys like that. I have no idea why I’m the ‘shiny new toy’ when Bella’s right here.”

“It’s because I don’t make a scene,” Bella noted.

“Well, Jessica, if you’re asking if I’m interested in Eric or Mike, definitely not. I’m not blind, girl. Mike’s for you, dearest girl, and Eric’s obviously into Angela.”

Angela gasped. “You really think so? But he’s never been that friendly or flirty with me.”

I shook my head. “Nonsense. He’s just trying to make you jealous.”

Jessica laughed. “And what about Tyler?”

“Who?”

“The guy who kissed you on the cheek earlier.”

I scrunched up my nose. “No-o-o way, José. I know a cute guy when I see one, and Tyler’s not it. Jasper, though… He’s definitely my type.”

“Well, good luck. They barely talk to anyone outside their clique,” Angela sighed. “Believe me, we’ve all tried to talk to them.”

“It’s because they’re all freaks.”

I frowned, but in that moment, an arm wrapped around my shoulder. I looked up, seeing that Eric and Mike decided to rejoin the group. Eric attempted to steal the seat beside me, but Mike shoved him aside, sliding beside me with ease. He threw his arm around my shoulder, shaking me excitedly.

“Not at all, actually. And give it up, guys,” Jessica groaned. “She already has her he’s on the prize. And before you chase Bella, she’s enamored by Edward Cullen.”

“We’ve returned. I’m sure you all were dying for us to bless you with our presence,” Mike announced.

“Dream on,” Eric sighed. “Ne-e-ever going to happen. I don’t think I’ve ever seen them talk to anyone but each other or the teachers.”

Mike removed his arm and Eric sighed. “Damn, really? Oh, you’re breaking my heart, baby.”

“I’m not like my sister,” Bella tittered. “I just… think he’s interesting.”

Bella unsurely glanced over her shoulder. I did so as well, noticing that Alice and Jasper were chatting while looking at our table. Japer’s gaze flitted over to mine, and he raised his hand, giving me a curt wave and smile. My heart jumped in joy and I grinned.

Mike wrapped his arm around my shoulder, pulling me closer. My expression immediately morphed into a displeased pout. I directed a glare him way, and he teasingly remarked, "Hey, I’m not going down without a fight.”

I shrugged off his shoulder. “Have fun with that, buddy.”

[shadowofroses]

Neko-Sanemi Chronicles

Demon Slayer PART 2

Pairing: Tsugoku!Reader x Shinazugawa Sanemi

Warnings: Mainly language, Cat bites, Cat claws, mention of Brothels

Previously Might as well make it a Mini series

Summery: Genya stops by to ask Sanemi for girl advice, however he is indisposed. Following up with a Visit from Kocho.

Story:

Usually you were never this boisterous with language around anyone, except when you think you are alone, or talking to animals in general. Or rather, normal animals. You poured yourself a cup of tea and went to grab some Ohage and Sanemi nipped at your ankle again. “Look I’m not even sure if you can have Ohage as a cat, you’re gonna have to suck it up and eat raw fish…YOU FUCKER!” This time he bit down on your foot causing you to drop the Ohage, and he grabbed it with his mouth and simply hopped onto the counter to eat it in front of you smugly. 

You were as prim and proper as you could be around your Master. Sanemi found this side of you amusing as all hell, and wanted to keep riling you up now that he knew he could get you like this. 

The only good thing out of him becoming a cat. He might as well make the best of it.

You glared at him as you grabbed another Ohage to eat, “Better not have fucking Rabies…who am I talking to of course you have Rabies.” Sanemi bristled and meowed in response. 

Finishing up your breakfast you finally head outside, with the cat in tow. You frowned, looking around, “I guess it’s basic shit considering I can’t fight a cat…”

Sanemi tilted his head, he never heard you swear this much. He was starting to think he was rubbing off on you a little too much. He sat down, and watched you melee attack a target dummy, before getting out a sword and following through with practice swings, he would meow in approval. Moving to go into a thousand sword lunges, when the gates opened, and a taller boy walked in. You turned noticing the younger Shinazugawa, and the older one standing at attention. Tail straight up in the air regardless. 

“(Na-name), D-do you know where Brother is?” Genya questioned lightly red. He’s been trying to get used to your presence being around constantly, you however were still a female.

You wiped some sweat away from your forehead, the switch flicking in your head. “Oh! Hello Genya~ I am afraid….your brother is…um…how do I say this?” You bit your lip trying to think of ways to explain how he was away, cause the first thing your mind goes to was ‘he’s gonna kill ya’

Genya blinked as he looked down to the cat that was currently rubbing up against your legs. “You got a cat!” He grinned getting closer before he realized that meant getting closer to your bare legs due to you wearing a short skirt like Kanroji. His face went redder at the realization and fell backwards, which you knew Sanemi would have laughed his ass off. 

You were just confused in the first place, “Genya! Are you okay?!” You went to help him up but he just scooted back away. You stepped back sweat dropping, “My bad, um…the cat…you see….there is a very good logical explanation behind the cat….”

Genya tried to get closer to the cat only for the cat to hiss, and hide behind your legs again. KNOWING Genya wouldn’t get close to the cat, for being too embarrassed of getting too close to your legs. “I wonder if Brother has some fish in the fridge…”

You deadpanned, “Might as well make it Ohage, it stole mine this morning.” Sanemi nipped at your ankle for calling him an It. 

“It? The Cat?” 

“Yes…”

“Brother isn’t going to like that…”

“Your brother is the cat.”

“…”

Sanemi stretched out in response after bristling. You frowned looking down at him, and he looked up, “Don’t look at me like that, you know it’s going to get around that you fell to Demon Blood Art that turned you into a cat, especially if Uzui-sama was the one that dropped you off. You also know Kocho-Sama will tease you relentlessly once your normal again.” You then froze when you realized Sanemi’s eyes widened, and it wasn’t at what you said. You twitched. “You….stay.” 

You went to turn around to go back into the estate, Sanemi tried to follow you. Genya blinked, “huh? What’s going on?”

You deadpanned, “Your brother was being a pervert.” Genya’s face turned red as Sanemi launched himself at your shoulders digging in his claws and meowing loudly in your ear. You cried out, “GET THE FUCKER OFF OF ME!” Genya’s eyes widened as you swore. Especially with what you were referring to. He simply reached up grabbing Sanemi by the scruff causing Sanemi to go limp and purr in his hand. “Thank you…Sorry for the language.”

Genya snorted, “Nothing I haven’t heard before especially from brother. I’m just surprised.” 

You sighed going into the estate to change out of your skirt and into pants. Coming back out, Genya was cradling the cat, scratching the back of the neck, and his ears causing him to be very complacent. “Maybe you should take care of your brother, I can’t stand cats…”  Sanemi hissed jumping onto your shoulder and just sitting there. “Are you a cat, or a parrot?”  You deadpanned again. Genya only snickered. “Anyway what was it that you needed Genya?”

Genya blinked, “Oh…I uh…” his face went red, “I…uh…wanted uh his advice on…uh asking a girl out…” 

Silence. You smiled, “I think I’d be the better one to ask instead of your brother anyway.”

“You think so?”  Genya rubbed the back of his neck. 

You looked forward, “Well I would assume asking a girl would be better instead of a guy that doesn’t have a girlfriend and goes to brothels.” 

NIP 

Genya’s eyes widened, “He goes to bro-brothels?!” You got nipped harder. 

You looked over to Sanemi who was glaring, “What, was that supposed to be a bloody secret? You’re very fucking open about it.” He bristled in response. 

Genya laughed nervously, “Yeah..um…no I uh…I thought you and my brother were dating honestly.”

This time this caught both you and Sanemi’s attention. “Heh?” From you and a weird sound from Sanemi. 

“I mean just the fact that you moved into the estate and the way people talk!”

You tilted your head, “I thought that was what Tsugoku’s were supposed to do if they didn’t have anywhere else to live…wait hold up Genya. Who the fuck is saying I’m dating Shi——Sanami?” You were going to go into saying their last name, but they were both there and wanted to specify. Sanemi’s ears popped up at attention too. 

Genya went red, “Mitsuri-sama says you two are cute together, and get along. Uzui-sama said it would be a waste if brother wasn’t…Zenitsu is convinced you two are dating.”

You took a deep breath trying to understand the logic. “Wait, so apparently me putting up with your brothers attitude long enough to actually get along and train is…”You squint your eyes, “we haven’t even done anything to signify that…what…” Sanemi blinked, tilting his head as well. 

“Mitsuri-sama says he stares like a…um…lover…and Uzui-sama said brother muttered your name in his sleep….” Your eyes widened with this information as Sanemi launched himself at Genya’s face claws out causing the boy to cry out. 

How dare he just state those facts so openly, Sanemi thought. 

“SANEMI!” You quickly went to grab him. “Cut that out or I’ll neuter you!” Sanemi looked back hissing loudly, like ‘you wouldn’t dare’. Genya blanched at the threat. You grabbed him by the scruff this time and just held him as he purred annoyed, not doing a thing except hang there. You pulled the body into your chest instinctively  “Side note you might want to warn Uzui-sama that you told me about these uh…confessions and your brother's response to it. That way he can be prepared when Sanemi is finally human again.” You sighed, “Besides, I doubt they are true anyway, and if it did ever happen I would have to find a way to remove myself as his Tsugoku.” You didn’t notice how Sanemi’s eyes sharpened at that. You moved forward and placed a hand on Genya’s face causing him to go red. “Sanemi did a number on you, come on, I’ll put a salve on the scratches.”

Sanemi wiggled in your arms as you tried to lead the younger brother into the estate, Genya shook his head. “It-It’s fine. Not like I’m missing a hand. It’ll heal. Thank you though.” he bowed slightly. “I-I should go now…”

You frowned at that, “Hold on, didn’t you want some advice?” Genya rubbed the back of his neck, before you came to a realization. “Actually nevermind, I’ve never had a relationship before, you’re best off asking Uzui-sama for advice. He probably would have better advice, he does have three wives after all…” you muttered, Sanemi scoffed. 

Genya nodded, “Ri-right, we-well I hope brother becomes normal again soon.” The boy waved and walked off the grounds of the Estate. 

You went to reenter the estate, however, you heard a voice, “Ara ara, what’s this?” 

You felt the cat twitch in your arms. “Ah! Kocho-sama, I had a feeling you would be coming soon. Please come into the Estate, I’ll fix you some tea and snacks while you draw Sanem-Shinazugawa-sama’s blood.” You lightly blushed at your mix up and shook your head. 

Of course it was noticed by both Sanemi and Shinobu. “Oh? I’ll take some tea, but I’m not hungry. This shouldn’t take long.”

You placed Sanemi on the Chabudai for Shinobu while you went forth into the kitchen to heat up some tea. You heard a hiss and a loud Meow. And a “Don’t be a prick Shinazugawa. (Name) will be back, now just let me draw some blood.” 

You shrugged off the conversation, grabbing the tea pot you went to walk back into the dining area.

[midnight-dreamerness]

Savior

Chapter 1: Brother’s Best Friend

(This is NOT my gif. Credit to the creator <3)

series summary: when your protector returns, he finds you broken and abused and helps you climb out of the darkness

chapter summary: you never thought you would see him after the funeral, but here he is.

pairing: Jay Halstead x Reader

warning: small mentions of smut(nothing major), mentions of abuse, mentions of death, mentions of blood

word count: 2.3k

A/N: Not sure how I feel about this first chapter...let me know what you think! Also some of this may be confusing but it will get cleared up as the story goes on. Also I barely looked over this for mistakes, so sorry in advance <3

~

You met him in college. He was the popular football player, wanna be NFL. You were the book work that didn’t need any distractions. He was sweet and caring but cocky. Somehow he convinced you to go on a date with him. Everything was going great, but then he hurt his knee during a football game. Then he changed.

At the beginning it was just a couple of harsh words here and there. He would apologize after.

“I’m sorry, honey,” he would say, pulling you close. You got used to it, to the words, the hateful glances he would send ever so often.

His future as a football player was no more. He ended up working in an office, but it wasn’t enough for him.

The first time he hit you, he had come back from the bar, drunk and angry. He had met up with his old teammates, got plastered, made a scene, and got kicked out of the bar. He apologized that morning, crying for forgiveness. And you forgave him. You stayed, even when the abuse continued and got worse.

The worst part is, you blame yourself.

I shouldn’t have tested him and I wouldn’t have to cover the bruise on my jaw with a pound of makeup.

And now, almost 3 years later, you're still making excuses for him. Every hit, every slap, every kick to the ribs, every busted lip or bruised jaw, it was always your fault. It didn’t matter that you did everything he asked. He always found something to punish you for whether it was leaving a dish in the sink, not having dinner ready for him when he got home, forgetting to pick up something for him at the store, or something simple like not making the bed. It was always something.

Kade wasn’t always beating you. He had good days too. You glance down at the ring on your finger, finding it out of place. It didn’t fit right anymore. It didn’t look right on your hand. Truth be told, you didn’t want it there anymore. But what were you going to do? He had mentioned time and time again that if you were to ever leave, he’d kill you.

The elevator dings, indicating someone had come up. It gains your attention, pulling your eyes from the files you were currently going over familiar. His familiar face pulls at your heart and your mind flashes with memories. You couldn’t believe your eyes. Your brother's old best friend is walking right up to your desk, a smile that somehow still makes you weak at the knees, stretched across his face. His eyes shimmer with glee, like he recognized you the instant your eyes met. The familiar ocean blue pulls you in and you're drowning in them all over again.

The gold star hanging from his neck has your attention, a grin appearing on your face. He’s always been a protector. You remember when Danny, your brother, had left, leaving you behind while he fought wars overseas. Jay was a year younger, so Danny had made him promise to look after you. He made him promise to protect you. And he did, until ultimately the year following, he left too.

He approached the desk, shaking his head while letting out a laugh.

“I couldn’t believe it. Miss Hawkins, secretary to the multimillionaire Reese Connor,” he teases, placing his elbows on the counter, intertwining his fingers together. You shift your weight from one foot to the other, trying to ease the pain from your side. He’s bigger since the last time you saw him, it must be four years now. You were barely 22 when he showed up to your front door, holding your brother's dog tags in his hand and tears in his perfect blue eyes.

“Me? Let’s talk about you, Mr. Detective. I heard you’ve been kicking it in the Intelligence Unit.” You laugh, leaning over to shove his arm. He chuckles but something catches his eye. There’s red marks around your neck. You didn’t notice where his eyes trailed, so busy looking over what you could see from your stop behind the counter.

His shoulders were broad, more so than last time it seems. His jaw, not as sharp as it once was and he was no longer clean shaven. His five o’clock shadow runs across his jaw and the lower part of his cheeks. You remember all the complaining he did when he was younger about how he could never grow it out probably and opted just to shave it so your brother would stop teasing him relentlessly.

There’s still freckles running over his face in the most perfect way, trailing down his neck and down under his shirt. There’s a scar leaking out from his olive green shirt that is partially covered by his leather jacket.

You shake your head, looking back into his eyes that hold a different emotion you couldn’t pinpoint, and sigh. “What can I do for you Detective Halstead?” You grinned teasingly. His smile reappeared in a matter of milliseconds.

“I need to speak to Reese involving a case I’m working on. Is there any way I could speak to him?”

You purse your lips, looking down at your watch before replying, “He’s currently in a meeting, it should be over in about ten minutes if you wanna sit and wait?” Jay nods. You smile, pointing towards the chair behind your desk.

He rounds your desk and takes a seat only a couple of feet from your chair, which you sit back down in. You try to ignore the burning in your cheeks. This feeling takes you back to when you were fifteen. A young and naive teenager who thought she was in love with her older brother's best friend, who was 4 years older than you.

“I can see your cherry red face and your facing away from me.” His comment only made it worse. You groan, closing the file and turning to him.

“You haven’t changed have you?” You ask, crossing your legs. It gains his attention immediately. His eyes trail down to your ankle, a large bruise covers the area.

“Well it seems you got more beautiful since the last time I saw you,” he stares, leaning back in his seat. A sting punctures your heart, sadness attempting to creep over you. You push it away, laughing.

“Yeah well it’s been a while since then.”

“You know, I can still remember those boy band posters hanging in your bedroom. And those pigtails you wore everyday in middle school.”

Groaning, you reply, “I hope you don’t still see me as that clingy preteen.”

“I think you know I don’t see you that way anymore.” You knew exactly what he was hinting at, and if it could get any worse, the burning in your cheeks intensified, the ache between your legs reminding you of how good he made you feel and how no other man, even Kade, could make you feel the way he did.

You suck your lips into your mouth, trying to hide your smile.

“What are you here for?” You find yourself asking, picking at your nails, attempting to change the subject before you say something you shouldn’t.

“I’m afraid I can’t answer that.”

Jay lets out a chuckle, making you glance back up to him. He’s shaking his head with a grin. You pout, turning back to your desk.

There was a slight pause as you tried to focus on your work, but you could feel his eyes on you, like he was trying to figure you out after all these years.

“Those are some nasty cuts on your hands, butterfly. What happened?” The nickname brought back so many memories of you and your brother. Tears welled in your eyes but you forced yourself to focus on the question, nervousness sitting in your stomach.

“I broke a plate washing dishes.” The lie fell smooth from your lips, dripping with innocence. A sound leaves his lips, like he didn’t believe you.

“Your eye?”

“Walked into a wall.”

“What about that bruise on your leg?” Looking down, the bruise now visible on the back of your leg you hadn’t noticed this morning while getting ready. You whipped around in your chair to look at the detective coldly.

“I fell.”

“I know you're clumsy, sweetheart, but not that clumsy.” Jag leans over, his forearms leaning against his thighs. “What about the red marks around your neck? Or the bruise on your shoulder that I can see through your white blouse.”

You curse yourself for being so careless. If Kade found out someone was questioning you, a detective and a friend no less, he’d kill you.

“Are you interrogating me, detective?” You ask, looking at him sternly. You intertwine your fingers and sit them in your lap. You watch him cross his arms over his chest, his muscular biceps, bulging through the sleeves of his jacket, gaining your attention. Gulping, you adjust your crossed legs desperate for the little pressure it gives. You hated that he could make you this desperate. Despite being angry, you could tell he knew the effect he had on you. He was going to use it to wiggle the information out of you.

“Does he do it when he’s drunk, sober, or both?”

You narrow your eyes, recalling the times you could smell it on his breath and the times you couldn’t. It seemed like it was worse when he was sober, when he was drunk he was sloppy. You glanced down to your lap, trying to keep the tears at bay. You didn’t need his sympathy. You didn’t need his help. You were a grown woman and you didn’t need your dead brother's best friend looking out for you anymore. You no longer needed his protection.

Luckily you're saved by a man approaching your desk from the direction of Mr. Reese’s office.

“Thank you, Miss Hawkins.” The man slaps the desk before continuing towards the elevator. You rise from your chair, motioning Jay to follow you down the hall towards your boss's office.

“That’s a pretty bad limp. You should get it checked out.”

You stop in the middle of the hall and turn to him, annoyed at this point.

“Detective-“

“What happened to JJ?”

Your eyebrows pull together as you run your hand over your face, a sigh escaping your lips. “Jay, I know you promised my brother you’d look out for me, but I’m fine.” You try to reason, even grabbing his arm and giving him a smile.

“I’m not doing this because of Danny, sweetheart. Believe it or not, I care about you,” he says, stepping closer to you. You gulp, pressing your hands to his chest. He had you against the wall now, his arms on either side of your head, trapping you.

“Jay, please. I’m engaged.”

Jay pulls back abruptly, giving you a shocked look but there was anger in his eyes.

“You're marrying that bastard?” He lets out a sarcastic laugh, shaking his head. You move to touch him, but he moves from your grasp.

“Take me to Reese.”

You look down, nodding before continuing on towards your boss's office. You knock on the door, waiting on the okay before walking inside. Your boss sits at his desk and was previously focused on his computer but his attention is turned to you.

“A Detective Halstead is here to see you.”

He flashes you a smile before motioning him inside. You let Jay pass, taking in a sharp breath as his body brushes with yours.

Once you're outside and the door is shut behind you, you lean against the wall, trying to calm yourself down. Ever since he came back from his first tour, to spend some time with his family, your feelings for him became much more than some school girl crush. You saw him in a new light. He was more than your brother's best friend, more than that guy who looked after you ever so often. He was a man and you, you were a woman. You had hoped for so long that he would see you differently. He did, but the time for you and him had passed.

Your little moment was ruined by the sound of a voice, “Who the hell was that?” Your head snaps towards the end of the hall. Kade’s friend Nathan stands there, a glare set in his eyes. You can hear your heartbeat in your ears as your breathing becomes unsteady. You're stuttering out incoherent words but he’s already pulled out his phone and dials a number while walking in the opposite direction of where you're standing.

Although filled with fear and worry, you continued working, distracting yourself and praying that he’ll let it go, or at least listen to you when you tell him you didn’t say a word to Jay. He knows Jay, and when he finds out that it was him who you were talking to, it’s going to be ten times worse.

Your attention is once again drawn to him as he walks up to your desk from the direction of the hall. He slides a card onto the table towards you.

“I wasn’t there for you like I promised you that day. I failed you, and I failed him. I know the signs. When you're ready to get out, call me. I won’t let you down, not this time.” You watch him walk away, heart sinking into your stomach. You want him to come back, but you couldn’t find it in yourself to call out to him, or to trust him again.

Before he enters the elevator, he gives you another look and adds, “You’re strong. Remember that.”

He gets into the elevator and he’s gone. You picked up the card, looking it over. He reminds you that not every man is as awful as Kade. But he has his claws dug into you so deep, you can’t even trust Jay, the man who protected you when your brother was away. You don’t know what to do without Kade. You love him.

He’s going to change, you tell yourself. You only hope you’re right.

_

A/N: Okay can i just say how sorry i am for how long it took me to post this story :( Not gonna make any promises but chapter two should be out Friday or Saturday. Thanks for the support. If you want to be added to my taglist let me know!

[muselin]

Kinktober 2021 Day 15

Healing Touch - TXT Taehyun & Huening Kai

Who: TXT Taehyun x Huening Kai

What: member/member smut. Handjobs, oral, first times. Also Huening Kai slyly seduces Taehyun.

Word count: 4k

________________________________________

Nothing out of the ordinary was happening at the dorm this evening. For once Taehyun wasn't staying late working on music but spending some chill time with Huening Kai, the two of them sprawled over Kai's bed. Taehyun was on his back reading on his phone and Kai was watching something on his laptop, his head resting over Taehyun's thighs. Taehyun was as relaxed and casually affectionate as ever, occasionally running his hand through Kai's fluffy, currently blond hair.

"Taehyunnie that tickles," Kai giggled on one of said occasions.

"Can we swap then? My leg is going numb, your head is too heavy," Taehyun said completely seriously, but Kai was used to his humor and his ways by now. This was Taehyun saying he wanted his hair played with.

Kai only made a sound similar to an exasperated snort and repositioned himself so he was sitting up with his legs stretched, so that Taehyun could lay his head in his lap. Kai moved his laptop at his side and continued watching his series as he threaded his fingers through Taehyun's silver locks.

It only took a minute for Taehyun to grow sleepy and put his phone away, only able to pay attention to Kai's hands in his hair. Kai noticed that Taehyun had grown even quieter and was no longer reading, and he took a moment to look at his slightly older bandmate.

They all admired Taehyun for his features and strong, calm demeanor and confidence, but Kai probably admired that most. He always thought of himself as more cute than handsome, and he admired the more masculine look that Taehyun projected. Especially since he had started seriously working out. The amount of times Kai had glanced at Taehyun getting changed or coming out of the shower with a towel around his hips and admired how his bandmate's body was developing... His waist was always so lean, the lines of his abs getting gradually more defined, his shoulders filling out little by little. Not as broad as Kai was naturally but they suited Taehyun's lighter frame well.

"Hueningie, what are you doing?"

"Huh?"

Kai looked down to find Taehyun's big eyes upturned at him quizzically. The younger then realised that his hands had dropped from Taehyun's hair and were now massaging his shoulders.

"Oh sorry, I thought you might like it," Kai said quickly to cover things up and pulled his hands back up.

Taehyun reached up with his boxer-like reflexes and grabbed Kai's hands, pinning them in place where they had reached Taehyun's neck.

"I didn't say "stop". Shouldn't I be on my front for this?"

"Up to you," Kai giggled, hoping Taehyun wouldn't spot that this was his nervous giggle and not his usual cute one. Although what was he even nervous about? He'd given the other members massages before. Just not Taehyun...

"What are you waiting for then," Taehyun said in his deadpan tone as he was already raising himself up off Kai's lap and rolling over to lie on his front.

"Wait, you really want me to massage you?"

"Yeah. Why not? I thought you said that one time you were good at it."

"When did I say that to you," Kai was puzzled.

"Not to me, but you said it to Soobin-hyung last year and he dared you to show him."

"How do you even remember stuff like this?!"

"For future exploitation," Taehyun grinned sideways as he turned to look at Kai. He then quickly pulled his shirt over his head and lay back down.

"I-I could've done it over your shirt...," Kai trailed off nervously.

"If we're doing this, we're doing it properly," Taehyun said, voice muffled into the duvet under him.

"So you want the massage oil and everything then? The full deal?" Kai snorted.

"Not quite that fancy. Let's see how you do with just your hands first."

"Okay then. Do you... Do you want me to be beside you or sit over you?"

"We don't have a table so you can't stand beside me, it wouldn't work with you sitting. If you're sitting, you can sit on me. I can take it."

Kai couldn't stop giggling as he straddled Taehyun's slim hips and positioned himself to sit on top of him, his pert little ass making a decent cushion for Kai to settle on.

"So is there anything you definitely don't like or anything that hurts," Kai asked.

"I haven't had many massages before. Yeonjun-hyung has had sports massages before but he said they hurt like hell. So I guess don't do it like that?"

"Sure, nothing like that."

"So where did you actually learn," Taehyun's muffled voice continued.

"In China, with my dad. I learned some traditional techniques, for unblocking chakras and stuff. You don't need to believe in it, it still feels nice," Kai explained, still not making any move to touch Taehyun with his hands.

"I can give it a go. Is there anything specific I should be doing then," Taehyun turned his head to the side to catch a glimpse of Kai.

"Okay, if you want to make it more of an authentic experience I'll guide you. It's all meant for relaxation so try and empty your mind. And breathe deeply and steadily. If anything feels painful or not right, let me know."

"A bit like meditation, but while I'm getting massaged?"

"Yeah, you can think of it like that."

"Alright, I'm ready."

Kai finally put his hands over Taehyun's shoulders, touching far more lightly than normal.

"Okay, so first I'm going to just warm up your skin and muscles a bit," he said soothingly as he began to press his hands lightly into Taehyun's skin, following the lines of his bones and the direction of his muscles. He could feel Taehyun breathing evenly under him.

"If there are no tense spots I'll move on to pressure points," Kai's soft voice flowed over Taehyun's senses and he could already feel himself relaxing in the rhythm of his breathing and Kai's fingers on his back.

Rolling, pressing and slight digging pressure was applied to different places on his back, along his deltoids, lightly over his lats and along the column of muscle on both sides of his spine. As Kai got to his lower back, Taehyun squirmed the tiniest bit.

"It's feels a little tender there, I think I haven't been stretching enough," he mumbled to Kai, who focused his attention on the lumbar area. He used his thumbs to pull and drag the muscles in certain directions and to press into them. Taehyun sighed as he relaxed more and Kai felt pulled under. Without the usual constant jokes and teasing this felt far more intimate and Kai was acutely aware that this was no longer platonic for him. He hadn't thought about what this meant for him in the long term but he was certain that he was attracted to Taehyun and was enjoying being able to touch him like this far more than he should.

His fingers dipped lower, into the cute dimples just above Taehyun's waistband. He knew this was a sensitive place for most people and he pressed into it smoothly but firmly. Taehyun reacted in the way he expected, hips involuntarily raising just a little.

"Good. So now, I will move on to some pressure points. First a few on your head and neck," Kai directed, more confidently than before. Taehyun only hummed in response.

Kai trailed his hand over the expanse of Taehyun's back, upwards until he reached the base of his neck. He pressed into the points where Taehyun's shoulder muscles anchored to his neck and Taehyun hummed again.

"Huening-ah, that feels really good. I've been a little stressed recently."

"A little? You think I don't notice what time you've been coming back from the studio these past couple of weeks," Kai teased, eyebrows raising incredulously.

"Yeah okay... A lot," Taehyun confessed.

"Then this should feel quite nice," Kai said with a smile as he moved his fingers up and down over the muscle surrounding Taehyun's cervical vertebrae, then dug down right where they connected with his skull. More humming from Taehyun encouraged him and he pressed harder, working the tension away. At the same time he moved his other hand back down Taehyun's back to press into a point below the dimples at his lower back, on his spine.

It felt as if an electric current ran through Taehyun's body, connecting the points between Kai's hands, and a rush of heat was being sent down to pool low in his groin. He inhaled sharply and his hips bucked up. The spot on his lower back continued to feel warm and tender even after Kai removed his fingers from it.

"Did it hurt?" Kai asked with concern.

"Ah.. No, it was just different."

"Good different or bad different?"

"Not sure. Not bad, I don't think."

"Some of these might feel a little strange, especially if you haven't had anyone touch them before or you have a lot of tension there," Kai tried to explain reassuringly. "Okay, so now I need you to turn over and we can do some points on your front."

Taehyun obeyed silently, turning over for the first time since they started. Kai raised up over him to allow him to turn over. When Taehyun was on his back, Kai grabbed one of the cushions off his bed and layed it over Taehyun's upper thighs for himself to sit on.

He noticed Taehyun uncharacteristically fidgeting with his hands, his big eyes pointedly not meeting Kai's. The younger ignored this for the time being and placed his hands on his friend's temples.

"Now we have a few points around the outline of your face. People usually hold a lot of tension here, from frowning and clenching their jaw."

Kai started working on both sides of Taehyun's temples, pressing and rolling in small circles and Taehyun felt himself relax again, his eyes drifting shut.

"Pay attention to your breathing. Make sure it's deep and regular," Kai instructed in a soft voice again, then moved down to gently rub Taehyun's ears between his fingers. He massaged the earlobes and cartilage then slid his thumbs down the sides of Taehyun's neck. As he trailed down the column of his throat and settled at the dip between the collarbone, Taehyun's skin erupted in goosebumps and he shivered.

"Are you okay," Kai asked, trying not to smirk. He knew what he was doing, as these points were all connected and not intended for just relaxation.

"Yeah.. I don't know why that happened but carry on," Taehyun tried to keep his voice calm but Kai heard the shakiness.

The younger rubbed his thumbs along the lines of Taehyun's collarbones, back and forth, rolling over the points where muscles connected to them. He then dragged his thumbs over Taehyun's breastbone and curved outwards to follow the line of his pectorals. Kai rotated his hands and placed them flat on Taehyun's chest.

The smaller male's body erupted in gooseflesh even harder than the first time and Taehyun's eyes shot open, burrowing into Kai's face. Kai could feel Taehyun's breathing and heart rate quicken under his fingers and his hips squirming lightly under his own. Now it was Kai who deliberately avoided Taehyun's gaze as he kept one hand splayed over Taehyun's chest and the other trailed lower, to press delicately into a point below Taehyun's ribs.

Taehyun tilted his face to the side when he felt himself starting to swell in his sweatpants, a blush rising up from his neck and aware of Kai's eyes glancing and searching for his as he felt his nipple stiffen under Kai's palm.

Kai's hand on his abdomen moved lower, his thumb dragging over and into the hollow of his bellybutton, then lower to press into a spot just above his waistband. The heat in Taehyun's chest kept rising into his face and lower into his groin and he was certain that Kai could now see he was hard. If Kai could see, he certainly wasn't saying anything and he dragged his hand away from Taehyun's chest down to join his other hand at Taehyun's abdomen. Kai's fingers moved to the sided then and he pressed into the diagonals of Taehyun's prominent hipbones.

Another jolt rocked Taehyun from the inside and his lips fell open in a gasp. His body felt like it was thrumming with anticipation for something and his hands shot up, grabbing Kai's at the wrists.

"Huening-ah," his voice was low and unstable, sounding like a warning.

Kai looked up at Taehyun's wide eyes and tense expression innocently.

"Everything okay?"

"It's embarrassing, I'm sorry I'm... like this," Taehyun tried to explain his raging boner. "Is this supposed to happen?"

"It is a relaxation massage, some people react with whatever part of their body needs attention to relax," Kai said softly, no teasing or anything suspicious in his tone.

"Shouldn't we stop if it's getting me... like this?"

"Do you want me to stop," Kai looked up at Taehyun, half with shyness and half with lust creeping into his gaze unintentionally. Taehyun recognised the look but was no less confused.

"Honestly? No."

"Good. Then I'll keep going."

"Wait! What's next from here then," Taehyun asked tensely.

"Well... if you're getting this tense then I would need to touch where the tension is focusing," Kai said simply, his eyes dropping to Taehyun's hard cock leaving a very clear imprint on the front of his sweatpants.

Raising himself up on his elbows, Taehyun captured Kai's eyes in a heated look.

"Huening Kai, are you attracted to me?"

Kai blinked rapidly and looked down, lips tensing into a line.

"Don't... Don't read too much into this, but lately I've been feeling... different," Kai said barely loud enough for Taehyun to hear. "It might be just physical. I haven't let myself think about it too much."

"Do it."

Kai's head shot up in surprise.

"Do it. Touch me. If I don't like anything, I'll tell you to stop." Taehyun's tone didn't tolerate objection but remained somewhat soft.

Swallowing thickly, Kai pressed his thumbs into the lines of Taehyun's hips again and Taehyun's head tipped back, eyes fluttering shut and white teeth sinking into his plump bottom lip.

Keeping one hand low on Taehyun's abdomen, Kai moved his other lower, brushing lightly over Taehyun's erection in his sweatpants. He glanced over, looking at Taehyun's bare chest rising and falling unsteadily.

"Breathe deeper, Taehyunnie," Kai murmured as he palmed his bandmate over his clothes.

Taehyun tried to oblige, a longer exhale and a deeper intake following. He looked so beautiful like this, Kai couldn't help leaning over him, closer to his face to study it up close. He moved his hand up to Taehyun's waistband and tucked his fingers inside.

"Huening-ah, wait."

Taehyun had brought his face closer to Kai's, his eyes half-lidded and lips parted, and Kai thought, deep beneath the surface of the raging wave inside him urging him to take Taehyun apart, to make him want, that he'd never seen anything more beautiful.

Slim fingers trailed over Kai's jaw and he was being drawn in. He closed his eyes and suddenly he wasn't in control anymore. Taehyun's kiss burned inside him. Soft lips covered Kai's own, slowly but firmly pressing and moulding against them. A small noise of barely restrained desire bubbled up from Taehyun's throat and Kai swallowed it, parting his lips without being asked. In contrast to his initial confidence initiating, Taehyun hesitated, but there was no way Kai could stop here. He ran his tongue over the seam of Taehyun's lips eagerly, feeling them part with a shaky sigh from the smaller boy below him, and his tongue met with Kai's.

In a deja-vu moment, Taehyun again felt the electric current flood his body, as if a line connected his lips being teased by Kai with his cock which Kai was tentatively stroking underneath his sweatpants.

"Oh Huening-ah, come on, I don't care. Just touch me," Taehyun's tone was almost pained, hips bucking up into Kai's hand.

"What do you want? Tell me," Kai breathed against his lips, never ending his kisses.

"Stroke me, please. Do you want me to touch you?"

"Only if you want to," Kai smiled into the kiss, pulling back slightly to look at Taehyun. "Have you ever done this with a guy? Or anyone?"

"I'm not a virgin, if that's what you're saying," Taehyun's sassiness raised its head for a minute. "I've only ever wondered about this but there's nothing to think about, we're right here and I want to experience this. You know what, no more questions."

With that Taehyun sat up and ripped Kai's shirt off of him. Taehyun's confidence was back and Kai shivered when his bandmate plastered his hands on Kai's now bare chest and kissed him hungrily.

Kai remembered his previous activity and wrapped his hand tight around Taehyun's cock which caused the latter to moan obscenely into Kai's mouth. Kai rubbed his thumb over Taehyun's tip and was surprised by a copious amount of precum which slicked things up and which Kai smeared over the head of his cock.

"Wait, wait, let me get rid of this," Taehyun grunted and pushed Kai's hand away to tug his sweatpants and underwear down and off. "I want to see you too."

Kai couldn't say no to those big eyes blown out with lust and shimmied out of his own bottoms. Inevitably those same big eyes then shifted down and zeroed in on Kai's impressive erection.

Taehyun didn't say anything, just tilted his head to the side and bit his lip as he stared at Kai's thick cock. He reached for it and wrapped his slender fingers around the warm shaft. It was obvious that he was touching another cock besides his own for the first time but Taehyun's natural curiosity and confidence made Kai shrink down under his touch as he felt Taehyun steal the control back from him.

The younger leaned back and let Taehyun work him, stroking slowly and exploring the engorged member in his hand as he shifted his fingers around. Taehyun pressed in at the base, then under the crown of Kai's cock, trying to find his sensitive spots and smirking when he finally found one after grazing Kai's sac with his fingertips.

"Lie on your side," Taehyun said and Kai obeyed, leaning onto his hand as he stretched out on the bed. Taehyun stretched out in the opposite direction and their bodies formed a closed loop, their hands and heads close to each other's cocks. Their fingers wrapped around each other's lengths in unison and their sighs joined together. Taehyun's was ripped out of a place deep in his chest while Kai's was airy and light in his throat.

"Taehyunnie, will you let me suck you?"

Taehyun looked down at his bandmate stroking him. Kai's lips were parted already, pink tongue coming out to wet them and Taehyun groaned at the thought of how that would feel on his dick.

"Go on, Hyuka... Oh fuck," Taehyun swore as Kai dipped forward with no hesitation and wrapped his lips around the head of Taehyun's cock. The smaller male nearly lost his grip on the thick member in his hand and tried to focus on stroking his friend.

Once Kai was finished wetting Taehyun's cock, he pressed himself down and sucked him in, tongue swirling at the underside. Taehyun's breathing grew ragged and uneven and his pumping on Kai's shaft sped up. Where Kai was good with his mouth, Taehyun was a natural with his hands and he worked Kai firmly towards an orgasm which Kai feared would be embarrassingly quick. The firm, relentless grip on his cock was making him dizzy, it was not how he pleasured himself when he was alone but he seriously thought he should probably start.

Taehyun was bucking his hips into Kai's mouth and Kai seemed to welcome it, hollowing out his cheeks and humming in delight around the cock in his mouth. He sucked harder and bobbed lower, Taehyun's tip pressing at the back of his throat while Kai's lips pressed at the base of Taehyun's pubic bone. Kai was deepthroating his friend and his cock was drooling in his friend's hand.

Mimicking Kai's actions earlier, Taehyun smeared the precum leaking onto his hand over Kai's tip, working the motion into his firm strokes and Kai started whimpering around Taehyun's dick.

The smaller male's hips pulled back uncertainly.

"Hueningie... Fuck... Huening-ah! I think I'm gonna cum," Taehyun tried to warn, at the same time jerking Kai's cock faster, reaching over with his other hand to massage his balls. The motion shoved Taehyun's cock even deeper into his friend's mouth and Kai groaned. He pulled back from Taehyun's dick with effort for a moment.

"Do it, cum in my mouth," Kai commanded, his voice low and raspy from the rough treatment on his throat, then sunk down onto Taehyun's cock and sucked hard.

Taehyun's eyes clenched shut and his grip tightened mercilessly on Kai's cock.

"Taehyun! Taehyun, fuck!"

Kai suddenly twitched and he felt himself spilling in Taehyun's hand. He groaned around his friend's cock and buried it as far as he could take it, reaching down to stroke at the base. Taehyun moaned at the feel of this and jerked into Kai's mouth, the thick muscle at the underside of his cock pulsing on Kai's tongue as his cum started pumping into the younger's mouth. Taehyun rolled his hips, thrusting languidly and shakily into the warm cavern of his friend's mouth as he emptied himself. He had enough presence of mind to keep stroking Kai through his own orgasm and Kai kept humming around Taehyun's cock in pleasure as his own seed was pumped out of him.

Taehyun's muscles then stopped cooperating and he sunk onto his back heavily, hand slipping off Kai's cock which was drenched in his own cum. He looked down and the utterly debauched, fucked out expression on Kai's face was burned into his memory. Blond hair messed up, lips wet and rubbed red from the friction of Kai sucking his cock, a droplet of Taehyun's cum sneaking over Kai's bottom lip.

"What did you do to me, I feel boneless...," Taehyun murmured, voice dull and muffled as even his vocal chords refused to function properly.

"I like to think a state of total relaxation has been achieved," Kai said smugly, voice still hoarse.

"It will be as soon as you pass me the tissues," Taehyun quipped and Kai used his lankiness to reach over the smaller male for the tissues on the night stand without getting up.

Taehyun wiped off the remnants of Kai's cum off his fingers and off the younger's softening cock. Kai dabbed at the corner of his mouth with a tissue then collected the balled up ones Taehyun had used and aimed for their bin, just missing it.

"Shoot, almost."

"Huening Kai, before I fall asleep, I need to tell you something," Taehyun mumbled. Kai leaned his head on Taehyun's slim thigh, using it as a pillow.

"What, Taehyunnie?"

"I lied earlier. I hadn't done this before. With anyone."

"Oh?" Kai raised his head to look at Taehyun but the latter's eyes were shut and he buried his fingers in Kai's hair, pushing his head back onto his thigh and stroking through Kai's locks.

"It's okay, I knew what I wanted and you gave me exactly that."

Kai pressed a kiss to the inside of Taehyun's thigh.

"I'm not much further ahead of you, to be honest. I hadn't done anything with a guy."

"Two overconfident horndogs," Taehyun smirked with his eyes still closed.

"Ya! That's not very romantic!"

"Sorry I'm an anti-romantic~," Taehyun sang teasingly.

"Ya! You're not getting any more massages from me," Kai pouted adorably.

"Oh okay, I'm sorry. I wouldn't want that. You wanna talk later?"

"Yeah," Kai nodded and yawned, an unspoken agreement passing between him and Taehyun to clarify things after a blissful nap.

[engie-ivy]

Marlene’s little brother has a thing for Sirius, because who doesn't have a thing for Sirius? Marlene is freaking out, and everyone thinks it's just hilarious. Remus would've thought it was hilarious too, had Marlene’s little brother not been very close in age, cute, witty, and oh so bloody charming.

Somewhat longer fic that will be added to my Crush Confessions Series! 3756 words, so not that long. Wolfstar Fluff, of course😎

Muggle Charms

James Potter’s garden party is the event of the summer. Everyone gets together at the Potter estate for a day of listening to music, swimming in the lake (yes, there’s a lake on the grounds of the Potter estate), and playing friendly Quidditch matches. Mrs Potter walks around with all sorts of delicious foods, James and Sirius fly their brooms above the lake and make bets who dares to jump off from the greatest height, Mary and Emmeline are sunbathing and make bets who will need to be healed first.

It had started the summer after first year with just the four Marauders, but every year, their number has grown, and this year is the largest group thus far.

Marlene McKinnon is last to arrive, and, as usual, her arrival doesn’t go unnoticed.

“Everyone, come meet my little brother!” She shouts across the field.

The McKinnons have four children. Marlene’s mother and two of her siblings are Muggles, while the rest have magical abilities. Marlene’s sister is the oldest of the siblings. She’s a Muggle who works as a primary school teacher. Despite growing up with a father who’s a wizard, she has always felt slightly uncomfortable around magic, but she loves her family fiercely and is very protective over her younger siblings. As she’s much older than Marlene, she has always been more like a second mother.

Next comes Marlene’s older brother, who’s wizard, but has finished Hogwarts long ago. He now works in the Sales Department for a company that develops novel potions against levitation- and portkey-sickness. According to Marlene he’s a serious businessman by day, and a giant goofball by night.

Last is Marlene’s younger brother. He’s a Muggle, but where Marlene’s sister likes to pretend magic doesn’t exist, he thinks it mighty fascinating. He and Marlene are incredibly close, writing each other constantly and hanging out as often as they can when Marlene was home from Hogwarts. She has never brought him to James’ garden party, though. He works in the Food Service Industry, and the bright summer days on which James plans his parties are the days on which he most likely has to work. This year, however, he had managed to get the day off.

The first thing Remus thinks is that the McKinnons have good genes. He can’t really tell which of the two siblings is older, which means they must be very close in age. The boy has the same thick, blond hair and bright blue eyes as Marlene, as well as the same freckles from the sun. He’s short for a guy, barely taller than Marlene, but he’s quite muscular, with broad shoulders. All in all, Marlene’s younger brother is a very cute guy.

“Everyone, this is Miles!” Marlene says, when everyone has gathered around. “Let’s see... Here we have James Potter, he’s the host.”

Miles grins at James. “Some house you’ve got here, mate. Thanks for having me!”

James grins back and lifts his beer. “Cheers, mate!”

“James is Lily’s boyfriend,” Marlene says. “You’ve already met Lily-” Miles gives Lily a warm smile “-and of course you know Dorcas.”

“Hullo Dorky.”

“Hiya Miley.”

“And here we have my other girls, Alice Fortescue, Mary McDonald and Emmeline Vance.” Marlene points each of the girls out, and Miles gives them all a friendly nod.

“And these two are the Prewetts, Fabian and Gideon- don’t worry about who’s who, none of us actually knows.”

“Oi!”

“And this is Caradoc Dearborn, and this Benjy Fenwick, so miraculously you’re not the shortest guy here.”

“Marlene!”

“And here we have the rest of the renegades, Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew and Sirius Black.”

The chance in Miles is instant.

The polite smile he was wearing turns into a coy smile, as he gives Sirius a not-so-subtle once-over, though Remus doesn’t think it was ever meant to be subtle. Miles takes a step forward towards Sirius. “Well, hello there.”

Remus can’t blame him. He would’ve reacted the same had he been in Miles’ position (alright, maybe he would’ve turned into a blushing, stuttering mess and forget his own name if he were suddenly faced with a guy like Sirius, instead of step forward with an enticing smile and flirtatious greeting, but that’s beside the point). Sirius looks bloody amazing. His swimming trunks are clinging to his legs, and his damp hair is hanging over his bare chest, with little droplets dripping down his muscular body.

Sirius grins knowingly at Miles. “Hi.”

Marlene’s head whirls around from Miles to Sirius to Miles and back to Sirius, so fast Remus worries she might get a whiplash.

“No,” she says. “No, nope, uh-uh, absolutely not. Not. Happening. No.”

She steps between her brother and Sirius, facing the latter, and jabbing a finger against his chest. “You are not going to try anything on my little brother, got it?”

Sirius holds up his hands and takes a step back. “I only said hi.”

Marlene looks at him suspiciously, like she suspects Sirius saying hi is some sort of secret seduction technique (which would actually explain a lot).

“C’mon Marls.” Miles moves to stand next to his sister, and throws an arm over her shoulder. He winks at Sirius. “We all just want to have a good time, don’t we?”

Marlene’s face is getting more red by the second. Her fingers are clutching her cardboard plate, causing it to rumple. She’s clenching her jaw, while intently staring at the pair a bit further on the field.

“I can’t bloody believe it,” she hisses. “If Black thinks I’ll let him hook up with my little brother, he has another thing coming!”

Miles had managed to catch Sirius when he went to grab a drink, and they have been chatting apart from the rest of the group for about half an hour now, to Marlene’s great distress, and everyone else’s amusement. Well, everyone else except for Remus, but he thinks he’s been hiding it quite well.

Remus doesn’t know how the guy does it, but Miles somehow manages to stand closer and closer to Sirius. He’s looking up at him through his lashes, with those big blue eyes and that damned smile, sometimes even going as far as to bite his lip. Sirius has definitely been blushing at some point!

While Remus is the only one who can emphasize with Marlene’s distress over the situation, he really doesn’t like how she’s blaming it all on Sirius, while evidently its her brother who’s acting like a little minx.

“Honestly, Marlene,” Lily says, shaking her head. “Didn’t you talk to Miles about there being an incredibly hot, single gay guy present?”

Remus agrees. Marlene should’ve known what would happen when she decided to introduce her brother to Sirius! You cannot bring him here knowing Sirius is looking like he does, and expect him not to react!

Marlene huffs indignantly. “My little brother is a precious angel who’s not interested in such a thing as ‘hot, single men’!”

Lily looks at Miles and Sirius. Miles seems to be laughing at something Sirius said, and touches his upper arm while doing so, letting his hand slide down Sirius’ bicep. Lily turns her head back to Marlene and raises her eyebrow.

Marlene just folds her arms over her chest and pointedly looks away.

Later, when Miles reaches up to brush a strand of hair from Sirius’ face, Marlene’s face has taken on a more purple colour. By this time, she has started angrily chewing on her cardboard plate.

Luckily, everyone’s too busy making fun of Marlene to notice Remus looks like he’s going to be sick.

Normally, a day at the Potter estate flies by, but Remus is positive this day lasts at least three times as long. But Remus has been getting through it. He hopes that after today, he won’t see Miles McKinnon of ever again. Well, he mostly hopes Sirius won’t see Miles McKinnon ever again, he can admit that . To himself, that is.

Currently, he’s sitting down with James, having a butterbeer. Just when he thinks he might make it through these last hours without further additions to his misery, Marlene comes striding their way, Dorcas on her heels.

“Potter,” she says, stopping in front of them and placing her fists on her hips. “You’ve got something I need, and I want it now!”

“Sorry McKinnon,” James says with a smirk. “I’m a one woman man.”

“In your dreams, you wanker,” Marlene snaps. “You’ve got an Invisibility Cloak, no?”

James takes off his glasses and starts polishing them with his robes. “I may or may not possess such a thing.”

Marlene rolls her eyes. “After seven years of going to school with you, I think I can safely say that you do. Well, I need you to use it. Miles asked Black to take him on a tour around the lake.” She scrunches up her nose. “And you have to follow them so you can report back to me whether Black has kept his paws off of my little brother!”

“More the other way around,” Remus mutters, but Marlene hears and glares at him.

“My sweet and innocent little brother would never do such a thing! He simply... wants to see the surroundings and needs Black for directions.”

Dorcas throws her head back and cackles loudly. “The only directions your ‘sweet and innocent little brother’ is interested in, is the fastest way to get into Sirius Black’s pants!”

Marlene directs a deadly glare at her.

Just when Remus thinks at least Dorcas knows what she’s talking about, she continues. “C’mon Marls, Miles can make his own decisions. Let the boys have some fun!”

Let the boys have some fun? That’s not a good idea! That’s the opposite of a good idea! That’s a terrible idea!

“Well,” Remus says, managing to sound surprisingly calm. “We’re on Mr and Mrs Potter’s property, and Miles has only just been introduced to the gang. I mean, he and Sirius barely know each other. I’d say it’d be rather inappropriate if something happens between them here and now. You don’t want Marlene’s brother to give off the wrong impression.”

James sighs. “What if I lend you the Invisibility Cloak, and you can follow them yourself?”

“Oh, no!” Marlene holds up her hands and takes a step back. “There are certain things I don’t ever want to see my little brother do, or hear my little brother say. If I were to... accidentally stumble upon them, I’d either have to Obliviate myself, or be scarred for life.”

Remus snorts. Not so sure about her brother being so innocent after all, is she?

“Well, Padfoot’s my brother!” James argues.

“Remember when I put in a good word for you with Lily, and finally got her to agree to go on a date with you?” Marlene plays her final card, and effectively.

“Fine!” James puts down his butterbeer and gets up. “Remus, let’s go.”

“What? Me? Why?”

“Because you got me into this, Mr ‘it’d be inappropriate’. And besides, I’ll feel like some perverted Peeping Tom spying on them alone.”

“So better to have two Peeping Toms?” Remus argues, but he knows it’s an argument he’s not going to win.

That’s how Remus finds himself in the place he wants to be least of all, crouched down under the Invisibility Cloak with James, and, after casting a quick Silencio over their footsteps, following on Sirius and Miles on their ‘casual, totally not romantic, definitely not a date’ stroll.

“-and once I’ve gained enough experience, I’d like to come back to London and open my own restaurant!” Miles finishes.

“That’s amazing, Miles!” Sirius exclaims. “I’ll definitely frequent!”

“As long as you don’t expect any free food just because you’re so handsome,” Miles teases.

Sirius gasps in pretend-shock. “I would never use my looks for such purposes!”

“Right,” Miles chuckles. “You be careful, Sirius Black. A face like yours is a powerful weapon.”

“Wow,” James whispers admiringly. “He’s good!”

Remus grits his teeth. Of bloody course Miles McKinnon is all charming and smooth, chatting Sirius up.

“What about you?” Miles asks. “What are your plans for the future, now that you’re some kind of strong and powerful wizard?”

“I’m starting my Healer training soon!” Sirius beams, and Remus can’t help but smile at the pride in his voice.

“That’s... like a doctor, right?” Miles asks.

“Yeah,” Sirius replies. “But without the cutting people open.” He shudders. “Definitely no cutting people open.”

“Oi!” Miles protests, bumping his shoulder against Sirius. “Doctors cut people open to save lives, you know. They don’t do it for a laugh.”

“I’m sorry!” Sirius quickly says. “I didn’t mean to offend. It’s actually very impressive what Muggle doctors can do without magic, and the things they’ve come up with! I’m sorry.”

“Hey, it’s alright,” Miles says, glancing at Sirius. “Don’t worry about it.”

Sirius smiles sheepishly. “Sorry. It’s just... I was raised in this really conservative pureblood Wizarding family. I’m always afraid I’ll say something Muggle-phobic without realising.”

“It’s okay, it wasn’t that bad, honestly.”

“Good,” Sirius says, relieved. “I’m just... trying to be better.”

Miles smiles softly at him. “Just the fact that you’re trying already makes you better.”

They walk in comfortable silence for a moment, until Miles speaks again. “That must’ve been hard though, growing up in a family like that. Marlene already mentioned you’re living here now. Is that why?”

Sirius nods. “I ran away from home the summer before. Best decision I’ve ever made.” There’s a tightness in his voice, though, and an emotion in his eyes that makes Remus want to run towards him and pull him into a hug.

“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” Miles says sincerely. Then he gives Sirius a teasing smile. “Though I must say, it’s a good look on you, the whole ‘sexy rebel’-thing.”

Sirius barks a laugh, and the pained expression slides off his face. “Well, I’m glad my issues at least fit my anaesthetic!”

Remus doesn’t know whether he wants to bless Miles McKinnon for being able to turn Sirius’ mood around and make him smile, or whether he wants to curse Miles McKinnon for being able to turn Sirius’ mood around and make him smile.

“I bet you love provoking your family, don’t you?” Miles asks.

“That might just be my most favourite pastime,” Sirius replies sincerely.

Suddenly, Miles stops walking, so Sirius stops as well and turns back to face him.

Miles takes a step towards him. “I bet it would really provoke your family if you were to make out with a boy, a Muggle boy at that.”

Sirius swallows and his face slightly flushes. “That... That’ll definitely do the trick, yeah.”

Miles comes even closer, now almost standing chest-to-chest with Sirius, and he tilts his head up and leans in.

James still looks mighty impressed with Miles’ flirting tactics, while Remus wonders if the sound of his heart shattering might give them away.

Suddenly, Sirius steps back. “Wait, stop. I... I can’t.”

Miles looks disappointed, but not too shocked. “Why not?” He asks. Then he jabs his finger against Sirius’ chest, much like his sister did earlier. “And I swear to god, Sirius Black, if it’s because I’m a Muggle you can stick that wand of yours up your-”

“No, no, no!” Sirius quickly says, whilst letting out a breathless laugh. “It’s not you, really, it’s me.”

Miles gives Sirius a stern look, while placing his fists on his hips, making Remus wonder whether they’re sure Marlene and Miles aren’t twins. “If you’re gonna give me that lame excuse, at least elaborate what it is about ‘not me, but you’ that makes you reject me. I mean, I’m not proposing a marriage here!”

Sirius sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “There’s... someone else. I mean, there’s not really, I don’t have someone else, but I have feelings for someone else. So therefore this-” He gestures between himself and Miles. “Just doesn’t feel right.”

Remus exchanges a look with James, who looks just as stunned as he is by this information.

Miles, though, just folds his arms over his chest and looks at Sirius thoughtfully for a moment. “So, Lupin then?”

Remus freezes. What? Him? Oh no. He’s not sure he can bear to hear Sirius’ denial. ‘Lupin? Remus? No, of course not! What in Godric’s name gave you that idea? Why the hell would I fancy Remus?’

However, Sirius just sighs and looks down at his shoes. “I’m that obvious, huh?”

Remus stares dumbfounded. It’s... true? He feels an eruption of butterflies in his stomach. Well, he always feels some butterflies when he sees Sirius, but now it’s like all those butterflies had babies, and those babies had babies again, creating an immense flutter.

“Nah,” Miles says. “If I had known for sure, I wouldn’t have made a move. I only had a suspicion, but I decided to take a chance anyway. I’m not too surprised by this turn of events, though.”

“It’s really the only reason,” Sirius says. “Because you’re bloody great, you know that? You’re gonna make some guy really happy one day. Anyone would be lucky to have you.”

Miles groans. “ ‘Its not you, it’s me’, ‘anyone would be lucky to have you’. Shall we go before you start telling me we can still be friends?”

Sirius grins. “Normally I’d suggest we at least pretend to have had a good snog, just to see if Marlene’s face can get any more purple, but I don’t want to give Remus the wrong impression. Not that he’d care,” he adds with a mutter.

Miles stops walking again. “What? Are you seri- No, Marlene warned me not to say that. Really?”

Sirius just blinks at him.

Miles shakes his head. “I mean, you asked if you were being obvious, well, you were nothing compared to Lupin. Although, that could just be me. I couldn’t help but notice when he’s looking at me like he wants me to catch fire every time I come near you. Wait. You wizards can actually do that, can’t you?”

Remus huffs. He wouldn’t have actually set Miles on fire! At least he doesn’t think so.

Sirius frowns at Miles. “You must be mistaken. Remus is nothing but pure kindness! He always makes everyone feel welcome! You can’t help but like Remus!”

A warm feeling spreads through Remus’ chest.

Miles just looks at Sirius, shaking his head. “You’re actually in love, aren’t you?”

Sirius blushes and looks away.

“Well,” Miles says. “You should tell him how you feel. He clearly feels the same. Then you can both stop this pining.”

James, who just had to process the shock of one of his best friends fancying another one of his best friends, now has to process the shock of his best friends fancying each other. He’s staring at Remus, and consequently trips over a rock. He does manage to catch is balance, but he lets out a loud yelp.

Miles stares at the empty spot behind them on the path, surprised, but Sirius’ eyes narrow in suspicion. He lifts his wand, and the next moment a gush of wind blows the Invisibility Cloak off of Remus and James.

To his credit, Miles recovers pretty quickly from seeing two people appear seemingly out of nowhere, including the person they were just talking about. He blinks a couple of times, then says “I suppose this works as well.”

Remus and Sirius are just staring at each other.

“Uhm...” James says. “I was sent here by miss McKinnon to escort the younger McKinnon back to the estate.” Because apparently awkward situations make him talk like he’s an eighteen century nobleman. “Off we go, young lad.”

Miles doesn’t protest when James grabs his arm and starts dragging him away, but he does turn around to give Sirius a thumbs up.

“We were sent here by McKinnon,” Remus quickly says, when he and Sirius are alone. “She wanted to know if anything would happen between you and her brother.” Remus takes a deep breath. “And maybe I wanted to know if anything would happen between you and him myself as well,” he says softly.

“Were you jealous?” Sirius asks. It sounds curious, not angry, judgemental or smug, just curious.

Still, Remus can’t help but pout, and he looks away. “Of course I was jealous. Bloody Miles McKinnon, with his big blue eyes, batting those ridiculously long eyelashes at you, and being all cute, and witty, and charming.”

“You know, if you want Miles to snog you instead, you should hurry and you can probably still catch him,” Sirius says irritably.

“No!” Remus quickly says. “No. I just mean, I wish it was me. When he calls you handsome, when he brushes your hair away from your face, when he leans in to kiss you... I wish it was me doing those things.”

“Why don’t you?” Sirius whispers, staring at Remus intently.

“Because!” Remus says desperately. “Because I know how to be your friend, but if I even think about flirting with you, I turn into an awkward, rambling mess.”

The only thing that can possibly be going through Sirius’ mind right now is how the hell he let the sexy, confident, flirtatious boy walk away, to be stuck with the flustered heap of awkwardness that is Remus Lupin.

Remus stares down at his shoes. “I mean, I like you a lot, and also because I feel comfortable around you, I do, but when it comes to flirting, I suddenly get scared that you’ll laugh at me or something. I even think it’d be easier if you weren’t my friend, if we didn’t know each other so well. Then maybe I could-”

Remus stops talking when Sirius gently cups his cheek and tilts his head up. Slowly, ever so slowly, he leans in, giving Remus enough time to pull away had he wanted to. Which, for the record, he absolutely doesn’t. Sirius presses their lips together. And it’s...

Well, it’s not awkward at all.

It’s fireworks, and symphonies, and the sun breaking through the clouds. It’s a sense of belonging, and knowing all is right with the world, and a feeling of coming home.

Both boys are a little out of breath when they pull back, more because of the intense emotions than because the kiss had been that passionate.

“See?” Sirius smiles at Remus. “If I want you to stop rambling, I can always just... interrupt.”

“Rude,” Remus mutters, before pulling Sirius back into another kiss.

[comfortwriting]

Best friends Brother - G.W

Part 1 of my slow burn mini-series, inspired by and dedicated to @amourtentiaa , want to be tagged? Let me know!

Masterlist, Requesting Rules, Writing Prompts

Part 2

George Weasley x Fem Reader 

About: The Reader is falling for her best mates older brother, she confines in Ron who is already afraid of losing his best friend to the brothers he’s so pressured to be like.

Warnings: swearing, fluff, mention of food and eating, but of angst, George punching a creep.

Walking away from Hagrid’s hut towards the castle, thoughts about the more quiet Weasley twin filled your hazy head - you were planning on shooting your shot, but first you needed some advice and the only person who could do that right now is your best friend Ron - currently chewing your ear off about Hermione and the house elves. 

“She doesn’t know when to stop does she? All the S.P.E.W nonsense, if she brings it up one more time-”

“Hey, do you think George likes anyone?” you asked as cool as possible, trying to contain your nervousness and excitement. 

Although you and George had only spoken few words to one another, he was all you could think about, all you ever thought about, day in day out. You would share sweet glances and looks across the common room in the evening, the beautiful amber glare coming from the flames projecting onto George’s face, making him look like an angel. 

As much as you liked him, you were terrified that he wouldn’t feel the same, that he only saw you as his little brothers best friend - you hated it. 

Ron slowed down from his brisk walk and he continued to stare at the ground “George? As in.. my brother?” 

“yeah” you smiled shyly, swallowing hard. 

Ron could feel his heart flutter, the idea of another person - his best friend - favouring one of his legendary twin brothers over him made him sick to his stomach, he couldn’t lose anyone else, he wouldn’t let it.

He pondered his thoughts, perhaps you were asking for someone else, someone Ron didn’t care about - the desperation in his stomach kept churning to find out. 

“I don’t know” he replied in a huff “we don’t really talk much, why you asking anyway?” 

You went quiet, suddenly finding interest in the scenery as the two of you edged closer to the castle. 

“uh, no reason” you lied, running your hand through your hair. 

For all of Ron’s flaws, he could tell when his best friend was lying - he never failed calling you out for it in the past, you learnt not to play any card games with him - especially when galleons were on the table. 

The two of you entered the loud castle, pushing past students in the hall, making your way to the Gryffindor common room.

“you like him, don’t you?” Ron muttered under his breath, making sure everyone else around you couldn’t hear.

You sighed and made eye contact with Ron, his facial expression even more sour than when he puked up slugs in first year. 

You walked up the stairs and held on to the rail, looking around for the Fat Lady “I suppose I do, I was thinking of asking him to-”

Ron could feel the sweat form in his palms and under his arms, images of you and George being together all the time instead of him flashed before him.

“I don’t know, Y/N, you’re two years younger than him, you haven’t spoken more than ten words to each other.” 

Your heart pained for a moment, your spirits crushing like the ingredients in one of Snape’s potions.

“I just don’t think he’ll like you that much, I don’t want you to get hurt.” he finished, the two of you finally reaching the portrait. 

“I guess so” you mumbled “you know him better than I do.”

Over the next few days you couldn’t stomach being around George, each time you looked into his gorgeous eyes and seeing him smile, caused your heart pain, a lump forming in your throat, and hot tears filling your eyes. 

At first George didn’t notice but when he would wave and smile - only to be ignored, he couldn’t help but overthink; wondering if he had done something wrong. 

It wasn’t just George who you ignored, you kept away from your best friend Ron too - Ron felt like shit but you were away from George and that gave him enough of a clear conscience to sleep at night. 

You couldn’t sleep, you missed your best friend even when he hurt your feelings, you also felt hopeless, the only person you ever showed an interest in wouldn’t even give you a chance.  

“What’s been up with Y/N lately? George asked his younger brother, buttering his toast, causing Ron to almost choke on his. 

“What you on about?” 

George rolled his eyes and swallowed his food, “unbelievable you are, she’s been avoiding you like the plague and she won’t even look at me.”  

“So, did you make up your mind yet?” 

You swore silently under your breath, recognising the voice who called out to you - an attractive and charming Hufflepuff student in George’s year with short black hair kept asking you over and over to go on a date with him in Hogsmeade, each time you said no had failed to satisfy his desire. 

“Uh” you were trying to figure out the best way to tell him to fuck off, but then again, what did you have to lose? “yeah, I’ll be there” you faked a smile. 

Ron watched in the distance and felt relieved, from his perspective, the possibility of you and George seemed incredibly slim to none. He walked over towards you as soon as the lad split, a smile creeping up on his face. 

“Y/N, alright?” he smiled, his hands in his pockets. 

You stared at him, yes you were hurt, but you missed him - he could do much worse to cause a much bigger fall out between the two of you. 

“I suppose” you sighed “walk with me to Transfiguration class?” 

Ron smiled “can do”

“and took your bloody shirt in!” you scolded him, bumping into him playfully. 

As much as you enjoyed visiting Hogsmeade, you couldn’t help but want to go back home and climb back into your warm bed, hiding away from the world - but your habit of trying to see the best in people lead you here - waiting outside Honey Dukes for your date to arrive. 

“Look at you!” he called out, walking over and kissing your hand “ready for the best day of your life?” he grinned.

Best day of my life? with you? I should’ve stayed in bed.

“Sure” you replied, plastering a fake smile on your face. 

The best day of your life wasn’t too bad, you had someone new to talk to, to try and get your mind off things - but your heart couldn’t help but yearn for George. You looked around the shops thinking of the products he liked, disliked, and what he bought for Ron at Christmas. 

Your date had more to blab about himself than get to know you, he held your hand and bought you a much needed Butterbeer - but he talked so much that he didn’t even get round to drinking his own. The more he had to say, the more he tried to impress you, the more you disliked him, making you fall for George even more. 

Finally breaking out from the busy and overwhelming pub and out into the cold, your date stood in front of you with a strange expression on his face. 

“So?” he shrugged

“so, what?” you stared at him, your patience wearing thin. 

The shared laughter between George and Ron came to a halt when George spotted you with his classmate, he knitted his brows together. 

“Why’s Y/N around that plonker?” he asked his younger brother. 

Ron looked at you then back to George “she’s on a date”

George shook his head “he’s an absolute creep” 

The two of them stared, the student took a hold of your hand and tried to pull you in for a kiss, you pulled away and glared at him, trying to not make a scene. 

“Fucking pervert!” George hissed, storming over towards the two of you “Hey!”

George clenched his jaw, his nostrils flared and his glaring gaze settled on on the lad, he bunched his right hand into a fist and swung, everything went in slow motion as George punched him in the face. 

You were speechless, you didn’t know what to say, all you could do was stare and watch the fight unfold. 

“Stay away from her or my foot will rip you a new one!” George threatened him, he turned to you, his facial expression instantly turning soft.

“th-thank you” 

“you don’t need to thank me love, are you alright?” George searching your eyes with his, full of care and concern. 

Your heart fluttered, his voice, him speaking to you sounded like the most fascinating birds chirping, and his caring face caused fireworks in your stomach to erupt into the sky. 

You wanted to take your chance, ask him out and start over but before you could do any of that, let alone reply, Ron hurried over and interrupted; putting you back in your place and making you remember how his brother felt about you. 

“Proper shiner he’ll have in the morning” Ron laughed “sort your knuckles out George, if anyone sees they’ll send a letter home.” 

The fluttering in your heart died down, the chirping of the birds instantly turning into the most dreadful squawks, and the fireworks in your stomach burning out, starving the embers before they could relight.  

“Thanks again” you murmured quietly, flashing George one last smile before walking away, wanting to retreat to your bed and hide away. 

George had to admit, he felt quite hurt that you went back to ignoring him after he had your back the other week - he knew that you didn’t owe him anything, not even an explanation - but he couldn’t understand why even after making up with Ron, you still refused to look at him.

Sitting on the sofa in the common room in your pyjamas, you flicked through your Quidditch magazine and blinked over and over whilst you looked across the page, sleep trying to pull you in. 

“Georgie, I’ve already said-” 

“Shhh!”

Jolting awake, you looked behind you and stared at the twins, long roles of parchment in one hand and a map in the other, you yawned and rubbed your eyes, closing your magazine. 

“It’s okay boys, I’m going to bed anyway.” you yawned again, slowly getting off the sofa. 

Fred and George shared a look, the older twin nodding his head towards you “go on then, mate, I’ll be upstairs.”

Fred walked past you, he whispered a “goodnight!” and went off to his dorm, leaving you alone with the person you wanted more than anyone in the world. 

George pursed his lips, standing around awkwardly before approaching you “Y/N, can we talk?” he asked softly. 

You nodded slowly, the nerves piping up in your tummy. 

“What’s up?”

“You’ve been ignoring me, love” he said softly “have I done something wrong?” 

This was your moment, not to ask him out - but to tell him the truth. 

You pushed your stray hairs out of your face and sighed, the lad of your dreams standing beside you, looking down on you. 

“I have feelings for you George” you admitted, your mouth going dry “and that’s why I have to stay away from you, because I know you’re never going to feel the same.” 

George went quiet, the embers from the fire spreading and making it set alight, the amber tones coming from the flames resting on his face. He smiled for a moment and licked his lips, looking into your eyes.

“Tomorrow night” he whispered softly in your ear “where we first met”

Tag list: @reeophidian @inglourious-imagines @alwaysnforeverfangirl  

[asher-the-diaster]

Sister planets part 7

soldiers being diplomatic

this is of course the 7th installment of a series and will make no sense without the other ones. you can find them here: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1DYMuKK5CIgJgDapNbu5sBqr_b5uT1Yz4pJoJ2fuAk4w/edit?usp=sharing

We found the humans with their breathing masks on refilling thru the burning wreck of the oracle.

“This looks like the wreck of the Hesperides,” captain penner commented, from the side standing on her crutch. I had no clue what that meant.

“Maybe that's because it’s an actual reck?” Oliveria said, continuing to seachthrew the ship.

Did they not notice it was in a containment chamber for health hazards?

“It's a turn of phrase.”

“Will you two stop arguing if I tell you that I found the food?” Richardson said, pulling a box out of the ship with his good arm.

“Probably.” the two who were fighting said at once.

They stepped out of the rubble and began to go through the contents of the box, dividing airtight packages.

“Don't waste it,:” penner said, we could be here for days.

“What are you doing?” I was wearing my diplomatic translator which flittered out a large amount of causes.

“Well you aren’t feeding us so we got the emergency rations form our ship.” Davoin said, jumping down.

“We were feeding you because our scans said you can go weeks without eating. Oh and all of your food is just biohazards or pisones.”

“1 we can’t go that long comfortably. 2. They aren’t really to us at least 3. You really don’t want captain penner doing this whole “diplomacy thing on an empty stomach.” oliverra replied.

“Why not?”

“They and the person that we have the best chance of contacting have made a game of… trying to strangle each other.”

“What!”

“Not really,” penner explained, “it's a siblingly joke.”

“I don’t know the words, siblingy, game or joke. The only part of this I understand is trying to kill somebody.”

“Not literally.”

We made it back to the airlock so the humans could eat a quick “breakfast,” as they called it, then made our way to the lab.

Here we had set up systems that could enter the humans “cellular network” and make contact with the humans, formally.

We had set up two sets, the captain took one, Davoin took the other.

First they made contact with their old pontoon, to tell them most of them had survived the wormhole.

“Most?” the person on the other end asked, “what do mean by that.”

“Lieutenant Mills,” Davion said, “he didn’t survive.”

The other line was silent for a long time.

“How did the rest of you?” the voice finally asked.

“We were saved… by aliens.”

“This isn’t a joke, sergeant!”

“I'm not joking.”

“Where are you? Really?”

“In an alien star station.”

“Sargent! We can’t help you if you're not being serious. And we can’t find your ship on the maps.”

“Because the thing was wrecked in the wormhole.”

“This isn’t funny! Tell me where you are!”

“We're telling you!”

“You know what, just don’t hang up, we will trace this call.” they went on hold.

“Well that was about as productive as expected.” Richardson snarked.

“We had to contact them.” Penner said.

“Why?”

“Because now even though we're still missing in action we aren’t presumed dead.”

“Yes, just presumed troublemakers.”

“Well it’s going to tacka while for them to trace a call from outside of the solar system, might as well do the worst thing.” Penner sighed, “can this tap into two signals at once?”

“Yes, why?”

“Because we need to contact a world leader.”

“How ecstasy are we planning on doing that? We would need some sort of connection that we don’t have.” Richardson asked.

“I know you're the newest member of our team, but dude.” Davoin said.

“What?”

“It’s just obvious how new you are to the team.” oliverra said.

“It's fine, not like I want to advertise it.” Penner said, puting their odd numerals into the system to connect to a specified line.

“Somebody tell me what I'm missing!” Richardson yelled.

I was glad he did so before me.

“You don’t happen to know the name of the Canadian prime minister do you?”

“Mathew Pinner, right?”

“It’s actually Mathew penner.”

“As in captain penner?”

“Exactly.”

“What?” I asked.

“The captain's older brother runs the government in their country.”

The captain pressed the call button.

“Hello this is prime minister penners office, ms smith speaking. How may I help you?”

“July, this is Sam the pm’s younger sibling. I need to talk with him.”

“Look mx. I cannot put you through to the prime minister. He is not currently taking calls due to a family crisis.”

“I’m the family crisis! Please let me talk to him.”

“I’m sorry but I cannot.”

“July please i-” the person on the other end hung up.

“You didn’t happen to have a plan b did you?”

“I don’t understand why my brother hired her, she’s imcomptent.”

Penner bagn to angrily press the buttons again. Into a different combination. Right before she could press the call button however, a voice came on from the other line.

“We were unable to verify your location, we’ll bring you home, just hang tight.” the voice hung up.

“Excellent.”

I shuffled on my paws nervously, these were our best chances and they were not going well. It was my first time running a contact crew and the species refused to make contact.

“One last shoot for this to work.” Penner pressed the call button.

“Hello?” The voice on the other side was raspy and tired.

“Mat, this is sam.”

“That’s just cruel. Look, I don't know who you are or why you think it’s funny to pretend to be people's dead siblings, or how you got your number for that matter, but it's not funny.”

“I can prove that I'm part of your family,” the captain yelled before he could hang up.

“How?”

“Sing the song of the dozos.”

What the hell did that mean?

“Were the weird ones,” the person on the other side said, “proud and tall. It’s really you?”

“Yeah.”

“They told us that you can gone missing through a wormhole. What happened?”

“We were saved by aliens.”

“Please tell me you’re not being serious.”

“I’d be lying.”

“Well you always were good at getting into trouble.”

“We need your help.”

“How?”

“To establish diplomatic contact with earth through the un.”

“Why me?”

“Your prime minister?”

“Oh right that.” the voice on the other side sighed.”I'll see what i can do. Hang tight sammy.”

The call ended.

*+*+*+*

sorry it took me so long to get this installment out. hope it isn't to bad.

[toomanystoriessolittletime]

Going back home {Chapter 2}

Summary: Claire never thought she would be back in the town she grew up in. But after her fiancé broke off their engagement, leaving her 5 months pregnant and alone she found herself calling Frankie Morales in the middle of the night, one of her childhood friends who insisted that she booked the next flight out. Trying to fix her life with a little help from her friends she would find out soon that going back would be the best decision she ever made.

Pairing: Frankie Morales x Claire Beck

wordcount: 2k

Warnings: pregnancy hormones, pining

Masterlist

Series Masterlist

Taglist in reblog

Chapter 1 | Chapter 3

“You know your childhood home is for sale?” Claire sat on the patio next to Pope who had decided to catch up with her.

“Seriously?” she asked and he nodded.

“Yeah. It looks bad though.”

“Like every house in this area that’s currently on sale,” she rolled her eyes.

“Yeah there are not many people moving down here, though there seem to be getting more in the last few years.”

“I mean it’s beautiful here,” she let her eyes wander over the landscape. She had always loved it here. Whole summers were spent on the Morales ranch when she was younger. Could have to do with the fact that Pa’ Morales made the best BBQ ever.

“Yeah it is. Better for your girl to grow up here, than in the big city huh?” he asked. She looked at Pope. He had gotten older. The lines around his eyes deeper than before. He always loved to laugh.

“Yeah. Though I didn’t picture it like that. I…” she sighed, feeling silly for the tears in her eyes. Fucking hormones.

“Hey. It’s okay. You gonna be fine,” his hand came down on her knee, squeezing it in comfort.

“Yeah you all keep saying that but it’s not you who has to push a baby out of your vagina without the father being there. It’s not you who has the responsibility to take care of a helpless kid for the rest of your life. I just… why? Why does he get to decide to walk out of this? It’s my pill that apparently didn’t work but it was him fucking me without a condom. He should take the responsibility just as much as I have to. Fuck…” she let her head fall back.

“Fuck him,” she looked up, hearing Frankie’s voice.

“Fuck him. He’s an excuse of a man. You don’t walk away from the woman you love. From the woman who’s carrying your child. Fuck… I was going through rehab while Liz was pregnant and I didn’t walk out…” he kneeled down next to her. She sucked her bottom lip in.

“I just feel so… so…” she shook her head.

“I know. But you’re not alone. You got me,” he looked at her. He was planning on taking her out for lunch when he walked in.

“But it’s not your job to take care of me Frankie. You got your own family.”

“You are family,” Pope said, now standing behind Frankie. “And if you want us to kill him, just say the word,” he teased and she had to laugh at that before she looked at Frankie again.

“I told you. You don’t want a hormonal woman living with you,” she joked and Frankie chuckled.

“I can take living with a hormonal woman,” he reached up to brush away her tears.

“Now what do you say? Lunch?” he asked and she sighed before she nodded.

“I gotta head out. But i’ll bring the house offers I found over tonight, okay?” Pope asked and she nodded. He smiled, leaning down to kiss her cheek before he left.

“I mean it. You’re family. Don’t ever think you’re a burden or alone. We’re here for you. I am here for you, okay?” Frankie said. Claire breathed in deep and nodded.

“Gotta get used to people caring. I was pretty lonely the last few years I guess.”

“Yeah. Better get used to it quickly,” he winked before he helped her out of the seat.

“Gotta get dressed I guess,” she shrugged.

“And I gotta shower. I can smell myself.”

“Yeah. You stink,” she grinned before she walked past him, leaving Frankie head shaking on the patio.

“Lunch is on you,” he called after her and she gave him the finger, making him laugh before he followed her inside to take a shower.

“So what made you open up a gardening business of all things, Morales?” she asked, sitting in the old diner they used to spend so much time in when they were younger. It might be lunch time but she couldn’t wait to have her ordered pancakes.

Frankie shrugged.

“I like being outside, keeps my mind off things.”

“You any good?” Claire teased and Frankie huffed.

“Let’s just say if you need any gardening I won’t be able to help you before the end of the year,” he winked.

“Impressive. I’m happy for you. Even though I still wanna hear the story as to what exactly happened in the last two years…” she said quietly, hearing Frankie sigh.

“Only when you tell me your story.”

She sighed and smiled sadly.

“We have a lot to talk about huh?” she asked.

“Yeah. But in time. Now we gotta eat and then we got to head to the store. Still need some stuff for the BBQ.”

“Fuck how many people are coming to this BBQ? I only have like 5 friends left here and I already met 4 of them,” Clarie groaned, leaning over the shopping cart as Frankie loaded another six pack of beer in.

“Pope kinda invited everyone over he knows so you can get to know everyone.”

“Because I like hanging out with people so much?” she asked, letting her head hang, earning a chuckle from Frankie.

“You and me both. But they’re all okay. Promise,” he squeezed her shoulder in comfort and she smiled a little, bumping her shoulder against his as he came to stand next to her.

“So what else do we need?”

“I got everything. Anything you need?”

“Ice cream?” Claire asked after thinking about it. Frankie only nodded as he grabbed the cart from her and pushed it towards the freezers with the ice cream. Like he had done it a million times before he walked towards the freezer, picking up Claire’s favorite Mint & Chocolate Chip ice cream and threw it in the cart.

“Still your favorite?” he asked as he saw the surprise in her face. She only nodded, a small smile playing at her lips.

“But pick up the mango ice dream too. Been craving that lately,” she grinned and Frankie nodded only before he reached for the biggest container.

The car ride to Frankie’s was quiet, both of them hanging on to their thoughts. It was strange how they seemed to fall back into their old dynamic as if no time had passed. It made Claire aware of just how much time she had spent with him when she was younger.

“This house is for sale,” Frankie said quietly as he stopped in front of the house just down his road.

“Charming…” Claire made a face and Frankie laughed. With lots of imagination she could see herself living here. But not within the next 4 months. This would be harder than she thought it would be.

“Maybe I should have stayed in New York…” she groaned to herself, her head falling back against the seat. She felt a hand on her thigh, her head tilting towards Frankie, unable to see his eyes behind his dark aviators.

“It’s been one day since you got here. We gonna find a house for you,” he squeezed her thigh and she sighed before she looked out of the window again. Frankie felt a weird feeling wash over him, his eyes dropping to the swell of her belly, before he released his hand from her to bring it back to the steering wheel, driving the car the short distance to his farm. A part of him wondered if the choices he made earlier in his life could have prevented some of the stuff he had gone through. Maybe he should have at least tried to go to college. Maybe he would have had a job that wouldn’t have required him leaving for months at the time. Maybe he would have had the guts to tell Claire that he wanted to be more than friends before he left for basic training. But he had found out that she had slept with Santiago, shattering all kinds of hope he might have had, that there was something more between them. To this day he wasn’t sure if maybe there had been more all these years back. He had always been too scared to tell Claire, scared that this would ruin their friendship. A friendship he had missed in the last years. He had wasted years on sleeping with women he never called after until it was a woman, Liz, calling him to tell him that she was pregnant. And he tried to make it work, he really did. A part of him loved Liz, because she was the mother of his child. But that was nothing compared to how he felt when he looked at Claire.

“Is it okay if I take a nap? I’m dead on my feet,” Claire asked as he stopped the car. He blinked at her, so lost in his thoughts. She yawned and he found himself smiling at her.

“Of course. As long as you make your guacamole later?”

She laughed, shaking her head with an eye roll.

“Wake me in two hours?”

“You got it,” he got out of the car, opening the door for her, helping her out. He had noticed her struggling to get out of his truck before.

“Thank you Frankie,” she kissed his cheek before she turned around to walk towards the door. He looked after her until she disappeared inside the house, shaking his head to himself.

“Get it together, Morales,” he whispered to himself before he unloaded the car and got inside himself.

Claire was in the middle of explaining to Frankie how to open an Avocado without killing himself worked, when the door flew open and the Miller brother’s barged inside.

“You got problems with your pipes?” Ben grinned at Claire and she snorted.

“In your Dreams, Miller,” she seasoned the avocados. Frankie shook his head.

“Come on, I show you my pipes,” Frankie teased, making Ben gag while Claire laughed loudly.

“You okay Claire?” Will asked, sitting down at the kitchen island in front of her, after he put the steaks in the fridge. Claire sighed.

“Didn’t think it would be this hard, but Frankie’s a big help,” she smiled a little, tasting the guacamole she was making. She reached for more salt.

“Yeah, he’s awesome. But be gentle with him. The whole custody thing is still pretty fresh,” Will said quietly.

“He hasn’t talked to me about it.”

“He will, I’m sure he will. Just… I mean you probably know him better than I do…”

“I’m gonna take care of him. Promise,” she whispered with a soft smile and Will seemed relieved as he nodded at her.

“Miss Beck. Your pipe problem has been solved,” Ben announced coming back soaked through his shirt back into the kitchen. Claire tilted his head, nodding approvingly at the muscles she could see through his white shirt before she looked up into his eyes with a teasing grin.

“I’ll make sure to preach about your plumbing services, Mr. Miller,” she winked and could swear she saw him blush for a second.

“Enough with the puns, we got a BBQ to prepare. Claire your shower is working,” Frankie emerged from the hallway, pulling a fresh shirt over his head and now it was Claire’s turn to blush before she became very invested in the guacamole in front of her while trying not to think about Frankie’s sunkissed skin on his chest, the little tummy or the dark trail of hair she most certainly didn’t want to lick.

She didn’t see Will’s knowing look before he got up from the seat to follow his brother outside.

Claire was so focused on the guacamole she only saw Frankie’s hand in the last second, slapping it away as he tried to steal a taste of the guacamole.

“Mean,” he pouted.

“Good things come to those who wait,” she grinned before she picked up the bowl to put it into the fridge, bending down to open the freezer for her mango ice cream. Frankie bit his lip as his eyes wandered down her body, averting his eyes before she turned around.

Fuck he wished that good things would be coming to those who waited.

Chapter 3

[alotofteez]

Sphallolalia | Part 4

Series: ⇢ Pairing: San x fem!Reader ⇢ Genre: flirty af fluff, hints of angst, suggestive, kinda smutty, older reader (noona) ⇢ Synopsis: As your best friend’s maid of honor, you must endure the shameless best man’s flirting until after the wedding. It's just sphallolalia... right?

Part 4: Across the Room ⇢ Genre: fluff, angst, & suggestive ⇢ Warnings: language ⇢ Word Count: 4,212 igotcarriedaway

Masterlist, Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9

Taglist: @joongiebug, @simluvbot, @kimtae-bae, @justsayk​

This comes at an inopportune time. As you have gotten older, you have noticed that you are much more emotional when it happens. Your period used to be just cramps, but now it can drastically change how you act, especially around others. Venue hunting for the wedding has now become a game of “Don’t cry in front of anyone.”

Today, it’s a beautiful place outside the city, but it doesn’t feel like the right place for Mina. Neither she nor Mingi is a countryside kind of person. The scenic nature landscape for their wedding doesn’t fit who they are. You have already mentioned this before they booked an appointment to tour the venue, but Mina really wanted to see it because it looks like one of those aesthetic weddings on Pinterest. Her special day shouldn’t pander to the desires of the internet. That would take away the special part.

For you, though, it would be perfect. It’s rustic with a touch of modern. The large paned windows overlooking the woodsy fields would be breathtaking during the golden hour. The crystal chandeliers give the room a more elegant feel, and the white pews would look beautiful decorated with flowers and ribbon as a personalized touch. The only thing you can’t imagine is the person at the end of the aisle. 

With a sigh, you continue to enviously look through a portfolio of photos of previous weddings. Two of Mina’s bridesmaids, Sejeong and Yujin, have joined in on the occasion. Sejeong was a teaching assistant for one of Mina’s classes and quickly became fond of Mina, similar to your relationship with her. Sejeong is closer to your age yet is more of an adult than you, in your own opinion. She received her Masters, got a job offer before even graduating, and is currently dating a VP of a large accounting firm. Unlike you, she has her life together.

On the other hand, Yujin is the complete opposite. She is one of Mina’s younger cousins. You haven’t spent much time with her since you moved out for college, but she seems to be the same outgoing, naive, and blunt person you remember from childhood. Though no longer a kid, she still acts like one, and it kind of gets on your nerves.

“None of these weddings look like something Mina would want,” Sejeong comments as she flips through a different portfolio.

“Right? I told her to look somewhere downtown. This is too farmhouse chic,” you say in agreement, shifting more weight to your forearms propped up on the table.

Yujin chimes in, but you don’t pay attention due to your phone vibrating in your jeans. Without looking at the sender, you open the text notification.

From: San🖕 You look hot like that. 10:43 AM

You glance up from the table to find him watching you across the room, eyes undressing you. When he notices he has your attention, he blows you a subtle kiss to which you respond with a quick flash of your middle finger.

From: You Now look who’s being creepy 10:45 AM

-

From: San🖕 That’s a weird way of spelling thank you. 10:45 AM

-

From: You I’ll block your number. 10:46 AM

You peer up at him as he receives the message and see his eyes dart in your direction. He gives you a look of disbelief before typing out a response.

From: San🖕 No! We’ll need to talk about wedding stuff! 10:47 AM

-

From: You And yet you text me that I’m hot… 10:47 AM

-

From: San🖕 Fine, I take back the compliment. 10:47 AM

-

From: You Good. I don’t want it. 10:48 AM

-

From: San🖕 You still look hot though. 10:43 AM

After reading the message, you roll your eyes and shove your phone back into your jeans. You can hear San’s snickering nearing behind you. He dawdles up next to you and peeks at the photos.

“That’ll be us one day,” he teases, pointing at one of the pictures of a bride and groom.

“I guess we all have unrealistic dream weddings,” you respond without missing a beat, making Sejeong and Yujin laugh. You turn the page unbothered by his presence. It takes him a minute to recover before flipping that stupid switch.

“Then tell me about yours, and I’ll make sure it happens,” he muses, one of his eyebrows raising.

“Mine doesn’t involve you,” you quip and finally look up from the pictures.

He holds your gaze for a few seconds, studying your eyes with a faint grin. Being this close-up reminds you how handsome he is, and you hate it. As you open your mouth to say something, a cramp surges in your abdomen, and you wince. It doesn’t go unnoticed by San.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I just feel kind of sick to my stomach,” you lie with the first thing that comes to your head.

“You know sugar can fix that.”

You give him a weird look, and he leans onto the table with his lips puckered and eyes closed. A part of you wonders how shocked he would be if you actually kissed him, but you stick with flicking his forehead, causing him to yelp.

“We’re going to look at the balcony,” Mina stops to inform the four of you before following the venue employee to the large glass double doors.

“We’re going to finish looking at these pictures,” Sejeong calls after her. The pages turn faster as she and Yujin hurry.

Your phone vibrates in your pocket after you start walking to the doors, and you prepare yourself for another flirty text from San. The contact name that is displayed on the screen makes you stop in your tracks. It feels like you have been sucked into a void and are all alone. Your head is pounding and feels heavy. Memories flood your mind of the person who has texted you.

About a year ago, you gave a dating app a chance. Several flirty conversations occurred, but one piqued your interest the most. Mark was nice and funny and matched well with your personality. In person, he was charming and more attractive than in his pictures. You felt that he was a keeper, but two months of “dates” that consisted of going to bars and then back to his place encouraged you to finally ask what your relationship was. His answer was that he didn’t want anything serious, just a friend with benefits. The damage had been done, and he quickly demoted you to just a friend.

You’ve only talked a few times since then, him hitting you up for a booty call only to ghost you again. Though you are ready to settle down in a steady relationship, you can’t resist being the center of his affection just one more time. You hold on with false hope that he eventually wants a serious relationship. With each hook-up, you promise yourself it will be the last time. It’s been a couple months since your last rendezvous. A simple ‘hey’ has more power over you than it should.

Coming back down to earth, you sense something lurking behind you, but before you turn around, a finger pokes either side of your ribs, making you squeal from how it tickles. San has a satisfied grin when you look behind you.

“You almost made me drop my phone!” You yell as he continues on his way to his and Mingi’s college friend, Yunho.

“You’re so lucky. San is, like, obsessed with you,” Yujin says catching up to you.

“He just does shit to annoy me. It’s not what you think,” you correct her.

“I want him to flirt with me, but he doesn’t even really acknowledge that I’m here.”

“Think of that as a blessing. He’ll use you and throw you away like a tissue.”

“I wouldn’t mind it being a one-time thing,” she sighs, longingly watching him walk with Yunho to the balcony doors.

You don’t want her to get hurt once she realizes that he exclusively has one-time things, but if she really wants to, who are you to stand in her way?

“Flirt with him first then, I guess,” you suggest, heading to the balcony as well.

The outdoor area is massive, hanging over the short cliff on stilts, with a view over the woods to the lake on the other side. You lean over the fence a little to see how far down the ground is from the balcony. Before you can stand straight again, a pair of hands suddenly grab your shoulders, effectively scaring the shit out of you as you grip harder on the wooden railing. Finding San as the culprit isn’t surprising.

“Oh, my god! I hate you! Stop doing that!” You yell holding a hand over your heart.

He only laughs, “I couldn’t help it.”

“I almost died!”

“I would have caught you.”

“No, from a heart attack, you asshole!” You push at his shoulder, but his grin only grows. He catches your wrist before you fully retract your hand and pulls you under his arm.

“Oh, you’re fine,” he contends, giving you a tight half hug.

“You are the bane of my existence,” you mutter as you allow him to playfully rock you from side to side. His sweater is soft against your cheek, and his cologne fills your senses. It’s comforting, and you kind of like it.

Yujin glowers at the two of you, burning in jealousy. Her fascination with him is beyond you. You don’t recall wanting to be used by a fuck boy at her age. Then again, you sort of do that now with Mark… Maybe you’re both fools.

“I don’t know what has gotten into you two, but you need to be quieter,” Mina warns you and San as the venue staff member guides your group back inside.

To be honest, you don’t know either. San has made you feel like a little kid again with his pestering antics today. You might be enjoying it a little bit. Maybe because it’s different from his dirty talk that leaves you a flustered mess.

Following Mina to the front of the grand hall, someone taps on your shoulder, and you turn to look. No one is behind you, but there is giggling on the other side of you. You realize you fell for San’s dumb trick, so you whip around and smack his shoulder. The two of you stop while everyone else carries on with the tour.

“Are you five?” You rhetorically ask.

“I think I’m more of a ten.” He grins.

“You’re so annoying.”

“Would you rather me do something else?” His eyebrow raises challengingly.

You suddenly feel his hand on your lower back gliding down and slipping into a back pocket of your jeans. Your body feels like it’s on fire with him casually touching your ass. God forbid he know how much you like it.

“You’re lucky there are other people around,” you say, removing his hand, “Because I would throttle you.” 

“Don’t threaten me with a good time.”

“Just wait.”

“Impatiently, I will.” He smirks.

“Why don’t you and Yunho go somewhere else before Mina gets onto us again?” You command, and he follows your orders.

Finally, you’re able to listen to the employee talk, this time about how the altar can be decorated and what has been done before that was beautiful. All the styles they mention don’t seem to spark Mina’s interest. You know her tells when she likes something, and currently, none of them are really showing. She nods politely and compliments the photos that are shown. It feels like forever before they move on to lighting options and the different fixtures that can be installed for weddings, and you feel like it is a good time to go change your tampon. On your way out, your attention falls on the guys a few meters away.

Yunho and San are leaned over a food table looking at a pamphlet, and you notice how San has his butt stuck out, an optimal position for payback for all the times he has taunted you today. You don’t know what comes over you to think of this idea, but if he wants to play hardball, then so be it.

Your hand makes contact with his ass, a dull smacking sound accompanying it, as you walk up to them. He’s fairly unfazed, just a little surprised, especially seeing that it is you who has spanked him.

“What are you two losers doing?” You ask nonchalantly, peering at the pamphlet.

“I kinda liked that,” San smirks at you, and Yunho can’t contain his laughter. So much for revenge…

“You like it physical, huh?” He adds.

As you’re about to scold him, Yunho’s phone lights up on the table, and Yunho sighs seeing the sender.

“Some girl you hooked up with keeps asking me if you changed your number.”

San glances at you briefly before speaking, “After a few weeks, I block their numbers if they keep texting me. Can’t let them get attached.”

“Wow, I didn’t think you could get any worse,” you comment with distaste and walk away, rolling your eyes. Your mood has visibly soured, and you know both of them have picked up on it. While you aren’t needed, you step out into the lobby to head to the restrooms.

After changing your tampon, you wash your hands and check your appearance in the mirror. The reflection of yourself is harshly criticized in your mind as your hormones get the best of you. No wonder you’re single; you’re not much to look at, not even San has tried to sleep with you. Tears start to blur your vision. Why must these intrusive thoughts destroy what little good mood you still have?

It takes a second for you to push them away. You shouldn’t be so hard on yourself and definitely shouldn’t let San be the decider of your attractiveness. Coming to terms with being forever alone, you exit the bathroom only to find San waiting down the hall to the lobby.

“You really need to stop following me to the toilets,” you express as he strolls towards you.

“I kinda like having you alone.”

“People are going to get the wrong idea.”

“Then we might as well do what they think we’re doing.”

“You’re all talk, no game,” you deadpan.

The look in his eyes darkens, and you feel yourself being backed against a wall. “I don’t think you realize that the game has already started.” He leans in close to your ear. “And your body is telling me I’m winning.” 

A hand rests around your neck, two fingers pressing into the side of your throat. Feeling your heightened pulse under his fingertips, he smirks, and you curse your body for giving you away that easily. Your wide eyes fall to his lips. His hand ghosts up, holding your chin in place as he leans in painfully slow.

You feel his other hand on your hip. His fingers sneakily play with the waistband of your jeans, lightly teasing a few of them under the band. God, you want him to drag you back into the restroom and fuck you up a stall wall. Even though you’re on your period and it would be an absolute mess, you would submit so easily that it’s embarrassing.

“Y/N!” Someone yells for you in the lobby, and the two of you come back to reality.

San just smirks and swipes his thumb across your bottom lip before heading back to the grand hall. You stand there speechless and incredibly aroused. Fuck your period and all the intense emotions that come with it.

Sejeong is stood at the grand hall entrance with her arms crossed, and you can tell she is peeved.

“You’re not going to believe what the venue owner just said to me,” she says in a hushed voice as you walk up, “So Mina and I were asking about having the wedding during the golden hour, and he starts talking about weddings at noon. Mina corrects him that the golden hour is around 5 and walks off. He gets all pissy, saying this is why he hates DIY brides because they think they know everything. I’m like why are you saying this in front of me when I’m literally here with the bride.”

“Which asshole is he? I’ll say something,” you offer, scanning the room for the owner.

“Over there talking to the guys, but don’t say anything. Let’s just tell Mina and leave.”

Making a scene would be counterintuitive considering the owner’s reaction to being corrected. You berating him on his behavior will not knock him off his high horse.

You follow Sejeong into the grand hall. As she repeats her story, you find San and Yujin stood off to the side. Seeing him smirk and flirt with someone else bothers you. You don’t know why or how but it does. Yujin giggles, and you know he’s saying something dirty. Just when you’re about to peel your eyes away from the scene, San glances at you, and you swear he winks.

As Mina rounds everyone up and thanks the venue staff, you hang around the main entrance with Sejeong complaining about the nerve of the owner and how he should educate himself on customer relationship management. You barely acknowledge San wandering up next to you, almost too blinded by rage. 

The day has felt like a letdown, and you know Mina was probably hoping this would be the place where she will get married. In a way, you’re glad it didn’t work out because this venue isn’t the right one for them. You just want her to be happy and have the best possible wedding.

After everyone finally exits the building, you trail behind zoning out in your thoughts of other venues to suggest. A pair of hands lands on your waist, and you feel breathing down your neck.

“Fuck, you’re hot when you’re mad,” San croons in your ear.

“Shut up,” you say, holding back a grin while wiggling out of his grasp. You would definitely deny the electricity sent down below caused by his words.

Reaching the cars, Yujin mentions she has to get to her cosmetology class and says her goodbyes, favoring San’s with a slightly different voice inflection that makes you cringe. 

“I think I’m going to start working out so I can lose weight for the wedding,” Mina voices her idea to you and Sejeong as she unlocks her car with the key fob.

“But that’s not you though,” Mingi cuts in, furrowing his brows.

“I want to look good for the wedding.”

You, Sejeong, Yunho, and San exchange awkward glances because all of you know what will transpire if someone doesn’t deescalate the situation.

“You look good now. What are you talking about?”

“I want to look better, Mingi. Is that so wrong?”

“I’m marrying you because I love you the way you are. You are literally perfect!” His voice raises, bringing the tension up with it.

“I don’t feel perfect. The least you can do is be a little supportive. You can ride back with them,” Mina says firmly before turning towards her car and directing her words at you and Sejeong, “Come on.”

“Can you believe him?” She huffs as soon as the doors are shut.

“I don’t think he was being mean. It’s like how I said this place didn’t seem like you. He doesn’t understand why you want to work so hard to lose weight for one day. He wants the two of you to be yourselves on your wedding day,” you try to explain his perspective.

“I just don’t want his family to think I’m ugly and unworthy of marrying him.”

“You’re not ugly, and if they do, they should get their eyes checked. From what I’ve seen, they adore you,” Sejeong adds.

“Thanks.” Mina doesn’t sound quite convinced.

“It doesn’t matter if they think that. It might not be ideal, but Mingi thinks you’re beautiful. That’s all that should matter,” you continue.

“I know. I just want to be accepted, you know?”

Oh, do you know…

Allowing her time to cool down, you decide to confess about a certain someone.

“Mark texted me earlier.”

“What did he say?” Mina groans.

“Just ‘hey.’”

“You didn’t respond, did you?” She glances at you urgently before shifting her eyes back to the road.

“Not yet,” you answer quietly.

“Don’t. You know what he wants, and he only wants that. We’ve already been over this. You two haven’t talked in over two months. Don’t fall back into that.”

“Who’s Mark?” Sejeong attempts to join the conversation.

“No one,” you say as Mina replies, “An asshole.”

With those responses, she leaves the sensitive topic alone.

But once you’re home alone to drown in your own thoughts, you really contemplate texting Mark back. It wouldn’t hurt as much as before to see him again because you know the pattern, right? One more hook-up isn’t so bad. Yet Mina’s voice yells in the recesses of your mind, and you know better.

A mind-numbing distraction would be nice, so you plop on your couch and turn on your TV. Finding the rerun marathon of Say Yes to the Dress is the worst thing to happen in your vulnerable state, but you don’t change the channel.

The customers look so happy when they find the right dress, and you feel tears come to your own eyes. Will you ever experience that: the overwhelming realization that you are marrying the love of your life and have found the perfect dress? How long will you have to wait until you meet the one? You should have met someone by now, right? Normally people are married and have kids by your age, yet here you are alone in a small apartment crying over a dumb reality TV show. 

You haven’t realized how far behind you are until Mina got engaged. Friends your age haven’t bothered you that much, but because Mina is younger by a few years, it has really cut deep. Your time is ticking.

Your phone vibrates under you, stopping you from slipping further into your depressive episode, but you groan seeing who it is that is bothering you.

From: San🖕 Hey, gorgeous, when are the bridesmaids going dress shopping? 10:21 PM

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From: You In a few weeks. 10:22 PM

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From: San🖕 So the groomsmen should go shopping soon too, right? 10:24 PM

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From: You Yeah 10:25 PM

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From: San🖕 Can’t wait to see what dress I get to help you out of after the wedding 😏 10:27 PM

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From: You Okay 10:27 PM

You sigh and roll onto your side on the couch cushions, sniffling uncontrollably. This is so pathetic of you that you wish your hormones would just chill out. Is it too much to ask for someone to love you? Why does it feel like you’re being punished for focusing on yourself before romantic relationships?

Everything seems to be triggering your tears, even this stupid cartoon nasal spray commercial playing in the background. Your cramps barely subside under your heating pad because of how tense your stomach is from containing your cries, and your shirt feels like sandpaper against your boobs. Why the hell are you craving French fries dipped in a vanilla milkshake?

A prolonged vibration of your phone brings your attention to San calling. You let it ring out so that he thinks you can’t answer. That does not deter him from calling again. You decline it this time, hoping he gets the message that you don’t want to talk. After a peaceful moment, you think he realizes, but unfortunately, he rings a third time.

“Why are you calling me?” You answer aggressively.

“Because you usually respond with something angry or annoyed. What’s wrong?”

“I’m not going to just unload all my sorrows on you. You’re not my friend. We have no relationship. I just tolerate you because our best friends are together,” you snap. 

The line is quiet for a moment, and you realize how harsh your words were.

“I’m not just some heartless asshole. If you don’t want to talk, fine. We can sit here in silence until you feel better.” He sounds calm yet firm. It’s a bit unnerving as this is out of character for him.

“I’m not going to stay on the phone crying while you listen.”

“Then stop crying.”

You are caught off guard by his brazen words. “Excuse me? I’m on my period, you asshole!”

“There it is.”

“Fuck you!” You yell and end the call.

From: San🖕 I didn’t mean it like that. I just want you to feel like you can talk to someone because I know you can’t tell Mina everything. I’m sorry. 10:36 PM

You leave him on read and sit up, tossing your phone to the other side of the couch. It should be you apologizing because you did snap at him a little too hard when all he did was be nice. Your phone vibrates again after a moment, and you can’t help but stretch over to read the text.

From: San🖕 I hope you’re not still sad. 10:40 PM

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From: San🖕 Happy looks good on you. 10:41 PM