#the worst part is also the best par

[riaki]

dog treats (for humans) | yuuji itadori x reader

pt.5 of christmas event! vry short sorry, a day late but it works as fluff for the jjk ep today !?

"[name], look! i baked something!"

your immediate thoughts are something along the lines of oh, no.

yuuji's a decent cook. or at least, that's what you like to believe; hours of the two of you making messes in your kitchen after ruining the recipe book you were following prove otherwise. still, he's not half bad. and there was that one time he taught his roommate to make meatballs; something vague like 'a legacy of hotpot meatballs'. that's your boyfriend for you.

baking, though, is certainly not his forte. as demonstrated by the giant blob of half-baked somethings on the tray; an amalgamation of dough stuck to the wax paper.

you're not quite sure what you're looking at when you enter the kitchen of your apartment; it's an absolute mess. there's flour everywhere, and some strange looking leftover dough sitting in a clump on the counter. it smells a bit weird, but that's not new. what draws your attention the most other than the flour coating the polaroids on the fridge or the four spatulas on the counter is the mess on his person.

he's coated in flour. there's dough sticking to his cheeks, almost like whiskers on his face— but that does nothing to dampen the sunny grin on his lips. his hair is ruffled, clumps of flour and powdered sugar clinging to the tips. you can just picture him mussing his hair in frustration, fingers running through the soft pink strands, the color of grapefruit and strawberry lemonade on a midsummer evening.

"what exactly did you make?" you asked, glancing him up and down. he's wearing the holiday apron you bought him on a whim; it's so dirty that you don't even recognize the pattern of the golden retriever stitched to the front. it looks more like a lima bean now.

he grins, pushing the baking tray towards you as if you're supposed to come to some grand realization of what exactly he did make.

"i made dog treats! for fushiguro. you think he'll like 'em?"

"those are dog treats...?"

you certainly wouldn't've been able to tell from first sight. but that explains the peculiar smell; it must've been a product of whatever he was doing.

"yeah! aren't they great?" he laughs, full of mirth, and you catch his smile on your own lips. his enthusiasm is infectious.

"they seem more like regular cookies." you note, observing the mess on the tray. the edges are burnt a gentle caramel crisp; if you didn't know better, you would've definitely taken the initiative to make cute cookies with your cookie cutters and frost them however you like.

you're too lost in your thoughts to notice what he's doing until it's too late— your stupidly beloved boyfriend has broken off a chunk and taken an equal sized bite out of it, chewing with all the thoughtfulness of a michelin star chef. there's a few crumbs in the corner of his mouth, and if not for the contents he probably would've asked you to wipe some jam on his lips and treat yourself to a sweet treat on his cheeks.

"yuuji!" you reach out, snatching the tray from him and setting it down before you scowl out the cheeky look on his full cheeks. "spit it out." you demanded, and you're faintly reminded that it's probably fine for him to be eating them because he's acting like a puppy anyway.

he just grins at you through a mouthful, shaking his head vigorously and swallowing as he pumps his fists, and you can practically see the stars in his eyes. "'s great! you shbould try ib, bwabe."

you just roll your eyes (albeit fondly), reluctantly reaching over to the tray to break off a chunk of the dog treats(?). you give it a good feel and sniff before nibbling off a piece, trying to discern the taste in your mouth. you're starting to think that yuuji might've mistakenly made regular cookies and called them dog treats. there was no sign of raw meat or anything on the counters, which only strengthened your suspicions.

"hey, it's actually not that bad." you marveled, glancing up at him again. he's watching you expectantly, waiting like a little puppy for your response. his eyes light up like stars; far too excited for such a weak answer as yours, but his enthusiasm shines through either way.

"right? i was thinking, maybe we could keep them to ourselves..."

"don't get carried away, yuu." you sighed, shaking your head. but he just grins, grabbing your hand and pulling you close to press an insistent smooch to your lips.

he laughs, sending vibrations through your skin as he peppers your face with floury eskimo kisses. "you'd rather me gift him these things? he'd sic his dogs on me!"

"...maybe you're right. let's just keep them, then."

my (riaki) stuff. don't repost and/or plagiarize !

[lylian333]

~Yandere emperor x reader~

warning: read at your own risk, traumatizing, dark historical shits, noncon, force, many misunderstandings,sexual harrest , angst ,age gap, everything here is quite insane, historical au, he's fucking crazy, killing, insults, English is not my first langue(if there's any warning I didn't put, tell me)

words:2180

(this is not my art I found it on Pinterest, and in the comment section it's said that it was made by AI so💀)

~~

Princess (y/n) Laurier has been best friends with Princess Alyssa Everett since you both were just 6 years old. You both have many things in common, such as interests, opinions, and much more.

You both would usually hang out around each other's kingdom; you don't have any issues with her except with her father, Emperor Edward Everett. He was the hottest, most handsome man you have ever met, and you still do now.

You have had a huge crush on him that felt like butterflies inside your stomach since the day you met him, but he always has that emotionless face and rarely smiles unless at his wife, your best friend's mother. You know this from Princess Alyssa; she would complain about how cold and serious he is.

You still ignore those and try getting to know him, but he just looks annoyed or just straight-up ignores you, but you ignore it and still continue liking him. Not only that, you're not the only one; it's obvious that everyone that has met him, females and even males, all drool for him.

You still have some sense in you, and you also have to respect the Everett queen and Princess Alyssa since she is your best friend. You can't just let some love ruin the relationship you both had. You can't. She is like a sister to you. She helps you when you're confused; she protects and defends you when you were getting laughed at; she is there when you needed someone the most. It's not worth losing a relationship like this, and so your liking toward his father slowly dies down.

But things change when you grow up and start having features and curves and in the end, you become a gorgeous woman, many people are jealous of you even Princess Alyssa confesses to you about it and some desperately want you. You reject all of them since none of them are worthy of you, and you're disinterested in them.

Your intense gaze and soft complexion, with your structured face and striking presence, are on par with an iconic beauty, paired with the warmth and softness in your expression, which are very delicate. You would struggle to not look at yourself when there is a mirror.

You still have some feelings toward Emperor Edward, but you manage to hide it and be able to not think about him when talking to him.

The worst thing that could have happened was that the Queen of Everett died from childbirth while trying to give birth to the heir to the throne, but it went to a disaster. It was devastating news to hear from everyone.

The emperor was absolutely devastated and even despised the child. From that moment on he would never talk to anyone unless it was part of a duty, but other than that he would ignore the servant's advisers and even his own kids, which left Princess Alyssa depressed since she had to bear her mother's death, her father's coldness, and the baby boy that her mother lost her life to.

That week she came crying to you when you came to visit her and attended the funeral of the Everett Queen death. You decide to stay at Everett Palace for a few months before going back to Laurier Kingdom.

You promised Princess Alyssa that you'd take care of her and her baby brother, and so you did. After all, back at your kingdom and your family, you have 6 siblings, plus you, and you are the third eldest, which makes you the middle You have experience with babies after the experience of you sibling that you swear are more naughtyer when you take care of them.

In those months of staying, Emperor noticed that you had to take care of the baby boy and Princess Alyass when he found you singing a lullaby for them to fall asleep.

At that moment something in him awoke, something dark, horrible, and disgusting. He knew this was wrong, but who was there to stop him? Not even himself could do that.

From that moment on, he would try getting close to you and getting to know you better; by that, he would call you into his office or into his chamber. When talking, he would get close to you, too close, to the point that he's invading your personal space by burying his face in your hair, breathing in that sweet, gentle scent, or sucking and biting your earlobe.

You knew this was wrong. You both knew this was wrong, but you guys still continued. Your brain keeps telling you to stop and that this is your best friend's father, but your gut tells you to continue. For your best friend Princess Alyssa's sake.

At one of those meetings, you confess to him that you don't want to continue these "meetings" to respect your best friend Alyssa and her baby brother Prince James.

But when he hears that you swear you could feel the air getting tense and his face looks tense as well, and with clenched fists, he looks like he could kill someone that might have been you or others.

He then pushes you onto his office desk and forcefully rips your clothes off. All you can remember that day was just horror, pure fucking horror. It haunts your dreams, memories, and everything that you see that can somehow be related to the day you and he were together.

The cherry on top is Emperor Endward sends an arranged marriage to your kingdom between you both; you pray that your parents would reject this offer, but no. Instead, they accept it and send you a letter telling you the reasons that this could help our kingdom very much and this could give you a better future and more, but all you care about is that you're trapped with him. They also added in that they would be unable to see because of the distance of the two kingdoms and that it is time to set you free.

Oh, how you wish it were true to let you spread your wings and have your own freedom.

You hated everything, mostly yourself. You hated yourself for not being more alert and not telling anyone, not even your own family or close ones; you—you can't even describe the feeling that you're feeling at that point. You quite literally were disgusted by yourself.

You cry all day long to the point where Princess Alyssa hears it and finds you, and you vomit out all the things that happened while still crying. You wish the earth could just eat you whole, make you disappear from the earth, from this world, from this life.

You keep pressuring yourself that this is your fault for days till your hair has a few strands of white hair that you have noticed.

The wedding was within the week, and you both got married and wed. That very day and night of the "honeymoon," he slams you against the bed carelessly and forcibly spears open your legs with his hand while another pins both your head on top of your head.

You whisper near your ear,True to be told, I have actually noticed that since you were just a little girl, you always had a crush on me, so technically you wanted this to happen, so don't cry like last time, dear."

Your eyes go wide when you hear that he actually noticed. He knows that you have no words—absolutely no words.

That night was as horrible and traumatizing as the night you both had together. Princess Alyssa personally tries to help you escape; even after the marriage, she still supports you, even knowing the fact you are technically her stepmother.

But she accepted you, and you were quite stunned at how she handled the situation. Even though it was like hell, she still helped, whether by holding you while you were crying or whatever she was still there. It felt like she was starting to take care of you instead of you taking care of her like how you first promised.

In one of the many attempts of you trying to escape and her helping you with it, you both were caught, and Emperor Edward decided to punish you by isolating you and sentencing Princess Alyssa to be beheaded, his own daughter.

And you were forbidden to give her any visits after the situation. You didn't get the chance to even give her the last hug or talk or anything, not even a goodbye. You even threatened to kill yourself if he didn't allow you to see her, but he just laughs at you and tells the guards to throw you inside a dungeon where there's nothing, not even a window, so you have to rely on the fire outside.

Just like that, she's gone forever. You cry for days and refuse to eat, sleep, or even drink. The king himself has to personally force-feed you so that you don't die. You even scream and beat him as hard as you can in rage whenever you see him, but he just stands there, not unbothered. You might as well think that he doesn't even care or feel anything anymore, no remorse, no nothing, just disgusting lovesick eyes looking at you.

"I just can't get enough of you, love~"

Your life goes on until you have had enough, like enough one more year of this. You seriously don't think you want to be reincarnated into another life. You desperately want to feel things instead of being trapped in the shared chamber all day long, only allowed to go out to the garden for 1 hour to get fresh air with a few ladies in waiting and your own trusted servants near you to keep being aware of you and make sure you're not doing anything harmful to yourself or escaping.

You came up with the stupidest and most shameful idea. You decide to frame yourself for cheating on Emperor Edward and confess to him that you cheated. Making up fake clues for others to notice and gossip about, but the emperor refuses to believe it, so you told him personally.

"I cheated on you, Edward."

"You must be joking, dear. How would you even be able to do that, hm?"

but you just keep repeating the sentence, "I cheated on you."

This makes him overthink and triggers him, and he ends up struggling with you to death in the process. You still keep repeating the sentence, which forces him to grip your neck even harder till you are no longer breathing—not even a single movement, just soulless eyes staring straight.

When he realized that it was too late and there was no turning back, he let go of your neck, and you collapsed onto the ground, dead. He kneeled down next to you; finally, at this moment, he felt guilty for everything. He reflected on the things he had done to you, the amount of damage. Why didn't he think about this earlier? Maybe that could help him.

No, it's your fault for cheating on him. How dare you filthy women cheat on an emperor that has done everything for her sake? To this day he still blames you, but part of him does regret not caring what you felt and thought. He only treated you like a toy, a glass doll that would easily be broken. But he just couldn't help but love you with all his might, even if it meant hurting you.

He tried to keep your body from decomposing and rotting and would soak you in water to slow down the decomposing. He even went mad and brought you to the throne room for events, dressed you properly, stuffed you with cotton to keep you looking more alive, and said to others, "My wife is doing well; look at her, she's such a sleepy head; look at her sleeping, hehe…"

Sadly, eventually, he had no other choice but to finally bury you because your body was decomposing and smelling really bad. At the funeral, he gives a speech on how she was in his life and how he can't believe she died before him from 'sickness' and oh how sad he was and how he saw her glowing up into an elegant woman and more.

Prince James also gave a speech about how you try helping out, that he always sees her as a mother figure, and how (y/n) has always tried her best. He was innocent in all of these; as well, he even balled his eyes out when he found out that you died.

At the very last moment of seeing your face, he cupped your cheek one last time.

"Oh, how much I will miss you oh how I wish that I could go with you as well, but it's fine you don't need to worry love In my will, when I die, I'm going to be buried right next to you." He says that while chuckling while feeling remorse.

~~

omg, there are so many things I want to comment on but erm yeah this is how it is??? it could have been worse

[seijorhi]

ik it wasn't part of the question, but I'm curious why do you think you won't vibe with the jjk men well? :00

before anyone comes at me, i love most of these characters to death, but speaking as to how i personally would handle being held captive to their twisted ideals of love... ya, no thanks.

gojo – i love him to pieces but the man is insufferable as a yandere.

geto – do you enjoy being spoken down to like a child? being treated as if you can't make a single decision for yourself? being constantly reminded that you're weaker than him, a little dumb (but he likes you that way), practically helpless before he came along and picked you up? i would not.

nanamin – i mentioned i would not do well with super strict, restrictive yanderes and nanami is an excellent example of that. daddy kink is all fine and well til you're in time out after being spanked stupid, chained to the bed in the most adorable pink mittens and socks.

yuuta – i adore yuuta, he's on par with geto as my fave, however as a yandere he's terrifying. like smiling while he stabs your friends to death cuz 'they were trying to take you away from me' crazy. would crawl into your skin and live in your bones to be closer to you kinda crazy. 0 chill

itadori – is clingy. so, so clingy. and touchy. admittedly he's not as bad as some on this list, he'll pout a lot and guilt trip, and when he's in a morose mood that becomes your problem to fix for him, it's just a lot.

sukuna – i just don't think i'd love being fucked while having the night's entertainment (aka random, innocent people, possibly your family and friends) ripped apart and eaten in front of me.

megumi – the man's not the worst on this list by far, however, he's jealous as hell, will not let you out in public and does not trust a word out of your mouth because he knows perfectly well you don't wanna be there with him and trying to manipulate him into easing up is your best bet of escaping. he's also moody as fuck.

toji – even in canon he's an asshole. yandere toji is not an improvement, plus the deadbeat dad thing does not translate well to his captive little spouse.

naoya – i despise the creature.

mahito – do i really have to explain this one?

choso – i could probably deal with choso. just agree to call him nii-chan and go with the whole sibling kink and you'll probably be okay. not outside or free in any sense of the word, but... okay

[miraclemaya]

So I haven't played disco Elysium so I'm not quite sure how the skills work, but I feel like it says something about Homura that she has a specific skill for dealing with Walpurgis Naugt--the most dangerous witch of all time--and a specific skill for Tea with Mami-san. Something about the idea that Homura is so fraught with issues that having tea with her friends (who worry about her and want to make sure she's ok) is on par with a witch who literally destroys cities.

you should definitely play disco elysium it's the game with the best written prose of any game to exist and also my favorite game of all time

but yes! in disco elysium, there are a few skills that seem to work on more esoteric and almost magical level then like the more normal skills like drama or visual calculus. inland empire in particular is the one that WITCH'S NIGHT is based on, which is basically a skill about hunches and dreams in waking life. inland empire can tell you some insane stuff that turns out to be true but it's never like straightforward about it. obviously the post is set in a world where homura beat walpurgis, so WITCH'S NIGHT is basically in retirement, but i would think in a more normal time loop scenario it's the skill that she uses to like understand the stage that the stage making witch is creating. not quite the same as like figuring out what's different this loop, but rather more like narratively what is the story of this loop. and since walpy is the one making the story, the skill is about figuring walpy out.

TEA WITH MAMI-SAN is supposed to be a little bit more board then it sounds like. it's actually set up as a opposite pair with THE CRAVEN MASSES. TEA WITH MAMI-SAN is basically the part of homura that truly does appreciate and care for the rest of the holy quintet. it's the one that remembers what Mami's favourite tea is, it's the one that makes sure to bring Kyoko food, it's the one that sees benefit in Sayaka's goal of heroism. It's the skill that helps Homura have friends basically. THE CRAVEN MASSES is the exact opposite. it's the part of homura that reminds her of their worst. Mami is a fool, unable to handle the reality of the world without shattering, Kyoko is an opportunist and a coward, Sayaka is a worth more as a corpse then as a person. It's the skill she uses to both predict the worse actions the quintet might make in a loop, and also the skill she uses to justify their execution if needs be.

as you can probably tell i put a lot of thought into all the skills dhdhdh sorry if this was a bit much, im glad you enjoyed the post

[notebooks-and-laptops]

Hello and welcome to: my official guide of where to go to get the best healthcare in Thedas! I'm gonna rank the best to the worst locations and give reasons for each.

1. Nevara

Nevara 100% has the best healthcare in Thedas. There are three primary reasons for this.

The first is of course, Nevaras familiarity with corpses, anatomy and the human body. Unlike most other locations in Thedas, Nevara doesn't burn their dead, but instead burries them. This can involve some form of mummification, but even when it doesn't, the bodies as later houses for spirits definitely don't have any secrets.

Secondly, Nevara has the mages for it. Good medical care in Thedas is going to involve a degree of spirit-healing and getting help from spirits. Nevaran mages regularly interact with spirits and petition them for help; it's basically a whole country whose magic speciality is the basis of all spirit healing.

Thirdly, although to a much lesser extent, Nevaran nobility are a) very wealthy and b) are dragon hunters. It's likely that this made them fund advances in medical care with their vaste wealth so they didn't die from said dragons.

2. Tevinter

Tevinter has been fighting a war with the Qun for centuries at this point, right on their boarder. War often leads to advances in medicine, particularly when it's drawn out and protracted. We know the vast majority of the military are Soporati like Krem rather than mages, so they can't just heal themselves with blood magic, they need advances that will heal a regular army quickly.

Mix this with the fact that Tevinter is probably the most magically advanced nation in Thedas and they have a really good culture for learning and research...I mean some of them are 100% researching best medical practices. In a very unethical way they're also clearly happy to experiment with what can enhance the body with their slaves like Fenris, which is horrid but probably has led to some medical innovations.

They're also not afraid to interact with spirits so their mages are primed for spirit healing.

They get minus points because I do think some of their medical practices would just be 'blood magic health away from slaves'. But ultimately not enough for me to bump them down too much because like I said above, they need solutions for non-mages too.

3. Rivian

Rivain gets number three because of the seers who have very close relationships with spirits. Lore drops we get in codexs from DATV suggests one very large part of a Seers job is to provide medical attention to those who require it.

Their economy is also built largely on bartering outside of the chantry controlled capital, so I figure that unlike Nevara and Tevinter regular folks can get/afford medical intervention rather than just the elites. The structure of society is also different with Seers acting as heads of their community as well as medical practitioners.

Rivain also has the advantage of trade of ideas. Rivain is home to the only peaceful qunari outpost outside of Par Vollen and many of those in Rivain still consider themselves qunari rather than following Andrastism or the native pantheistic belief structures. So they're going to get the benefits from knowledge about medicine from across Thedas. Which leads us nicely to...

4. Par Vollen

But! I hear you protest! The Qun is so anti-mage and definitely anti-demon that they don't have spirit healers.

And yes, that's why they're number 4 not number 1. But they definitely have excellent healthcare. For one, they have a large military they have to keep healthy that has been at war for centuries, as well as an expansionist ideology which will require them to invest in even more health innovations to keep their standing army healthy.

But more than this, the Qun has a completely different philosophy to most locations in Thedas. The Qun views society as a whole, rather than being more individualistic. Thus, keeping farmers, artisans, scholars etc. safe so they can perform their role for society is just as important as keeping your army safe. They're thus gonna invest in a lot of public health infrastructure. Par Vollen is definitely the place you wanna be if you're not a noble and you get sick.

The Qun also has really good training; children are assigned roles at a young age and trained to fit them so their medical training probably starts at a young age and is fairly extensive.

The Qun would be my bet for a) the most hygienic nation in Thedas and b) the most likely to create vaccines first. Also. I bet their trans healthcare is top notch. You want top surgery this is the place to get it.

5. Orlais

Orlais is a rich nation which prides itself on its university culture. Nobles like to have pateron scholars to reflect well on them. I think both of these things mean medical research is not uncommon when a noble gets an idea into their heads.

Orlais also is the seat of the chantry and the circles. This means that of the Andraste nations they are much more likely to be able to get the circle to come and give them a spirit healer. Crucially they can also get mage tallent imported from other circles like they did with Viv without anyone asking any questions.

But I think mages are far more restricted than our top 3 countries and their fear of spirits/harrowing is going to make spirit healers both more cautious and more rare. Further, actually getting a mage to act as a spirit healer is a huge deal and a status symbol; we see that in the masked empire when a soldier is shocked they Gaspard has a spirit healer mage on his staff. So only really wealthy/powerful nobles are benefiting from this at all.

Also we know from the masked empire that some of their university biology is fueled by racism rather than actual research so they lose points for that.

They do get bonus points for having some hygienic cultural tendancies; the masks and the gloves in particular.

6. Antiva

Antiva is similar to Orlais I think, but they unfortunately don't have the same edge with the circles and mages that Orlais has. Orlais can move any tallented circle mages to Orlais proper if they show up in Antiva.

They are a trading country so they will likely get medical information from Rivain, Orlais and Tevinter but I think nobles in Antiva would be more interested in funding protection charms and anti-assassin traps than medical knowledge as Antiva doesnt do war in the same way as the other countries but it does have a lot of assassins. The crows absolutely hold Antiva back from medical knowledge I think.

7. The Free Marches

So I'm lumping the free Marches together but I do think there would be minor differences; mainly between places like starkhaven where we know Sebastian is funding a lot of research and places like Kirkwall where literally the sensical was going to a guy in the sewers for his check ups.

But overall, the free marches just don't let mages have the freedom they need to practice spirit magic. They're a lot harsher there (we know that about Kirkwall, and we also know that Tatervale basically has chantry enforced mashel lore so...). They also seem to be places where there's much more of a culture of 'everyone for themselves'.

Further, we've seen that Kirkwall at least is just built on back to back houses and people living in literal sewers. The free marches just. Don't seem a super hygienic place to live.

8. Ferelden

I'm really sorry ferelden but you've got so much working against you. You're a largely rural community with most of your major cities and even towns just littered with back to back housing. You don't have great access to mages and their abilities. And I imagine Orlais took most of their knowledge with them/kept ferelden from developing their own universities and other research centres during the occupation.

Now, I do have some honourable mentions. Firstly:

Orzammar

So part of me feels orzammar should have good healthcare. Mainly because orzammar has been in a perpetual war with the darkspawn for over a thousand years now and they're constantly chucking people at that problem; while well aware of their declining birth rates.

But I think from what we see in DAO they just don't seem to have a good healthcare system at all. There just doesn't seem to be a space in the caste system for that apart from maybe some shaparate dwarfs? Also doesn't seem to be a lot of paragons being named for medical advancements.

And then you have dust town which is huge and definitely a hot spot for potential illnesses.

I think perhaps the fact that dwarfs don't get ill very often and are more hardy perhaps got in the way of them developing a good medical system beyond some stuff I think they would know how to do; like cautorising wounds.

Also no magic :(

The Dalish

So I think this would be a clan by clan basis. Some clans seem much more willing to engage with spirits and spirit magic than others who seem much more hesitant (keeper marithari for example).

I'm adding to that that I think the dalish keepers have a lot more to do than focus on their healing skills and as there doesn't seem to be very many mages in a clan (around 1 - 5 depending on which games lore you're following) they're probably splitting their attention between lots of different practices rather than focusing only on spirit healing.

They probably do have good oral records of their medical practices tho! I also think they'd be good at dealing with broken bones or twisted ankles as the clans are constantly on the move so I imagine that would be a priority if someone gets hurt that way. Also, I imagine everyone in the clan does get medical attention when needed compared to other nations and groups that have big wealth inequalities.

And that's the list folks! Let me know if you agree with me this is such an interesting subject

[grandlinedreams]

Hello, I've been reading Ur fics lately (esp with law) and I love them

I was wondering if you could make angst? Like... Let's say there's this big battle, like the one in wano, where reader and law gets separated, but after the battle Law finds reader unconscious and being treated by chopper who then explains they had severe wounds and might need blood transfusion.

It also just happens that he was gonna confess to them after all of the chaos so that they'd be safe in his arms. And that might not even happen since now they have each foot on both worlds.

I'd imagine Law going along with talking to them even if they're unconscious just to keep them here in the living. (If they're alone ofc)

I hope that's alright

OUGH some angst my beloved,,,i can absolutely do that, I hope I do this justice for you!!

[Heads up!: angst, serious injuries, some brief medical talk, hurt/very little comfort, keeping in line w Law literally calling none of the Strawhats by their names, open-ended]

Truth be told, Law doesn't keep much of an eye on you during battles. It's hard enough keeping an eye on what the enemy is doing ㅡ especially if the Strawhats are involved. They ㅡ especially their captain ㅡ have a knack for blowing careful plans out of the water and he's forced to play damage control until it's over.

You're also fully capable of looking after yourself, and he trusts you and your skillset. So when he doesn't immediately find you once things have started settling down, he doesn't think much of it.

When five minutes turns to ten, then to fifteen, then half an hour, however, alarm bells start going off in his head. You've never taken this long to check in with him. Has something happened? Have you beenㅡ

No, he won't let himself think of that option. Not now, not ever. So he keeps as optimistic as reality will allow him ㅡ until he hears his name being called.

"Oi, Law!"

It's Sanji. "What is it, Blackleg?"

The blond's expression is his first warning that whatever it is, it isn't pleasant. "Chopper told me to come get you."

That's his second warning. Eyes narrowing and trying to rifle through potential scenarios from best case to worst, he follows Sanji silently until they reach where Chopper is ㅡ and Law stares at who the little reindeer is desperately trying to patch up.

It's you.

Part of him whispers harshly that this is par for the course, that he's worn out his luck in terms of keeping you safe ㅡ another notes that he's never seen you look more fragile.

"What happened." It's a demand as he takes in the bandages all over you, trying not to think about how most of them are already soaked with blood. Your blood.

He barely hears the explanation above the rising ringing in his ears, but he gathers enough to find it in himself to mentally curse your perchance for heroics. He's told you time and time again that your self-sacrificing attitude will get you into trouble, and now it has. (As if he isn't guilty of it too from time to time, but that's neither here nor there.)

"They need a transfusion," he says, kneels to gather you into his arms, trying not to focus on how limp you are. "I'll take it from here."

If Chopper protests, he doesn't stick around long enough to hear it. From the second he sets foot back on the Polar Tang, it's a blur.

Bandages are stripped from you and replaced, an IV of fluid in one arm, blood in the other. One of the defaults to joining the crew is letting him know blood type so he has it on hand, and he's never been more grateful to have it and less so that he needs to use it.

For the next few hours, Law hardly blinks, barely lets himself breathe ㅡ afraid that somewhere between, you'll slip from him. He can feel the cold circle of death around you, measuring, evaluating. Deciding if you go, or if you stay.

He wants you to stay. If there were ever a way to guarantee that you do, he'd do it now ㅡ but there isn't. So he sits, counts your breath (in, out. Up, down.), and waits.

And he talks.

He tells you that you're a pain, that you need to stop thinking so much of others before yourself, that a quality like that is only admirable until it means a grave instead of life. That you shouldn't be so cavalier with your time, that there are people who care about you, and what are they supposed to do if you die?

He means himself in that too. He's gotten accustomed to your presence, the way you've slotted your way into his routines and habits like you belong, and perhaps, were he a romantic, he'd say you always have. But he hardly has time for that, barely lets himself entertain it ㅡ too soft, too ideal, too good to be true. Always too much of something.

But he wants it, wants you ㅡ wonders if he'll even get the slimmest chance to tell you now. Law could tell you now, but he doesn't. He's afraid if he does, it'll tip the scales further from his favor and he'll undoubtedly lose you.

He can't do that.

It isn't fair ㅡ but when has the world ever felt fit to treat him in a way that could ever be seen as kind enough to be called fair?

[sagereeid]

Scars that never healed - s.r. - chapter 2

a/n - chapter 2!!!! hi and thank you for all the love in the last chapter! please comment too. i want to hear everybody’s thoughts! i also decided that im going to post chapter every sunday, tuesday and thursday. and, (when we get caught up) a chapter here before i post on a03.

warnings - bitter!spencer, lily overthinking, cussing. (let me know if i missed something)

The bitter sound of Lilith’s alarm clock shot her awake. It’s not like she was sleeping much anyway. Nightmares and lying awake at night are par for the course when it comes to working with the FBI and seeing the worst criminals.

Or at least that’s what she’s telling herself. However, somewhere deep inside her brain, she knows she was lying awake last night because of Spencer and his behavior. He’s been coming over for a year. They had a routine for God’s sake.

Lily stared up at the same spot of the ceiling she had been staring at before exhaustion swallowed her whole. She let out a frustrated groan, even though she wanted to scream.

She mentally cursed at herself for getting so upset over a slight behavior change. Lily finally shook her head, clearing her thoughts, and sat up, swinging her feet over the side of her bed. The cold hardwood was grounding her.

“No, Lilith. It’s fine.”

The words ring in her hand as she stands up and sleepily stumbles to the kitchen. Maybe she'll be okay if she gets some coffee in her system.

Her actions became blurry as muscle memory took over: coffee, three sugars, milk. She leaned against the side of her counter as she finally took a sip, letting the warmth spread from her throat to her chest.

Lily continues her morning routine: shower, hair, makeup, and outfit. Today, she blew out her chestnut colored hair and wore a purple blazer. Spencer’s favorite color—no. Jesus, what was wrong with her today?

By the time she gets to the BAU office, she is strangely calm—way calmer than at home. Maybe it was just her being alone with her thoughts that did it.

The elevator door opens, and the familiar scent of coffee and office air washes over her. She smiles when she walks deeper into the building, nearing the bullpen, with all sorts of sounds around her: people walking in and out of offices, others getting up and down from their office chairs, and doors opening and shutting.

Something about the quiet chaos around her made her smile. It was familiar.

“Good morning, mama.” Morgan smiled with that charming smile that would make any woman swoon.

“Morning, Derek.” Lilith smiled back as she sat her things at her desk. Then, Penelope Garcia came into the bullpen. Lily smiled. Penelope was Lily’s best friend ( if it wasn’t Spencer. )

“Hi, sugar plum.” Garcia greeted.

“Hi, honey.” Lilith smiled at her with her teeth, a rare sight. Speaking of rare sights, “What are you doing out of your office?” She asked.

“Mama bear has to get her coffee every once in a while.” Garcia joked, walking her way into the break room. Lilith followed.

“And chocolate?” Lily raises her eyebrow and gives her a knowing look.

“Shhh!” Penelope laughs as pink flushes on her cheeks, knowing who Lily was talking about. Lily laughs along with her, hugs Penelope, a silent “See you later,” and walks back out to the bullpen and her desk

A few moments after she sits down, the elevator dings, and she looks up. She can see Spencer prepare himself to put on that fake smile he shows everyone but her. And it’s even worse that the smile he puts on happens to be the most charming Lilith has ever seen.

Lily looks down at the files on her desk. Her brain tells her not to say anything or even look at him. She doesn't even know why. However, the other part desperately pleads to look up at her best friend.

Ultimately, her brain wins out, and she keeps her head down until he takes his place on the desk next to hers.

“Good morning, Spence.” She says as he finally looks up. She gives him her signature smile and sweet voice.

He just nodded, didn’t even look up.

Lily felt that feeling last night; when he walked himself out, and it started consuming her. She sat back and stared forward. What the fuck? She repeated in her head. First, was it sadness, confusion, annoyance, and then maybe anger? She didn’t know which

Lily sighed and got up, walking back into the break room to make a coffee. She grabs a cup, and a million things run through her head. Did I do something last night that explains all of this? Is he mad? Is it something that has nothing to do with me? By the time she’s done overthinking, she looks down at her hands, and there are two cups of coffee, one for her and one for Spencer. She even wrote their names on them.

Lily looked down and sighed, thinking for a moment. She didn’t want to throw it away; that would be a waste. Maybe the coffee would make him feel better. She’d be sure she made his coffee right if her muscle memory took over. It’s ingrained into her brain: black, two sugars, no creamer.

She took one last deep breath before pushing the door open, walked back to the bullpen, and set the cup of coffee on his desk without a word.

However, Spencer still sticks to his theme of the day. Ignoring Lilith. She stood there for a second. Waiting for something. But, of course, nothing comes.

She tried not to sigh as she sat back at her desk. Lily sipped her coffee, feeling an immediate bitter taste in her mouth. Whatever, she thought to herself and pushed it away from her.

Not long after, Hotch comes into the bullpen, alerting them that they officially have a new case and must be in the roundtable room in 15 minutes. After those 15 minutes, they all shuffle into the roundtable room and take their unassigned assigned seats. This time, Lily sees what looks like Spencer tugging JJ into the seat that Lily typically sits in. She feels a weird pang in her chest.

Why? is the only question that lingers in her mind. However, she says nothing; she is working for God’s sake. Focus. Eventually, she shakes her head to clear her thoughts, sits in JJ's typical spot, and tries to focus on the case presented before her.

A string of college-age males are being killed in Minneapolis, Minnesota. The profiles for each victim are different, and they are of all different ages, hair colors, skin colors, etc. The only thing that is the same is their ages and the fact they were in Minneapolis. The thing is, though, they were all from out of state.

Lily writes that down on her notepad, and she hears Spencer scoff. She is sure it is directed towards her and knows she’s aggravated. She can feel his eyes on her. A shiver runs up her spine.

[apollosgiftofprophecy]

The Copollogism Essays - Part 1: The Tent Scene

SO. Here we are. I have absolutely ascended to insane over two fictional characters' relationship by this point, and this will merely cement that into place.

I do not know how often I will update this, but rest assured I have it all figured out! I'll update with links below for easy access to the other posts as I analyze our favorite dumpsterfire ship >:3

Believe me when I say I have Thoughts™️

These essays will detail the scenes Apollo & Commodus have shared, as well as a look into how it affected them and we'll also take a look into where it stands in the toxic relationship territory (The answer may surprise you. Or not. I am not quite sure myself at this point in time LMAO).

Additionally, I will be giving my own thoughts on a few things I've noticed within the series. I will refrain from talking about my own personal headcanons and focus on what we're given in the books, as well as any and all historical facts from Commodus's life that relate to their lives/relationship.

From The Book: Part 1 (The Tent) ~ Part 2 (The Assassination) ~ Part 3 (Lester's Reaction) ~ Part 4 (Leo's Questions/Seeing Commodus Again) ~ Part 5 (The Arena) ~ Part 6 (The Waystation) ~ Part 7 (The Yacht) ~ Part 8 (The Final Moment)

Analysis: Part 1 (Apollo and Commodus as Individuals) ~ Part 2 (Toxic Relationship?) ~ Part 3 (Codependent - Or Is It?) ~ Part 4 (Other Thoughts)

Let us kick off with the infamous: Tent Scene.

The Tent Scene

All quotations from The Dark Prophecy

Let's break it down.

I could certainly sympathize with his feelings. Marcus Aurelius was the sternest, most powerful father in the world aside from my own father, Zeus. Both loved to lecture. Both loved to remind their offspring how lucky they were, how privileged, how far short they fell of their fathers’ expectations. And of course, both had gorgeous, talented, tragically underappreciated sons.

How their fathers treat them is certainly a focal point of their relationship, with Apollo knowing enough about Commodus's feelings on Marcus Aurelius to be willing to compare it to his own relationship with Zeus (which is...honestly worse than Commodus & Marcus's).

“My father made me his junior co-emperor when I was fifteen, Apollo. It’s stifling. All duty, all the time. Then he married me off to that horrid girl Bruttia Crispina. Who names their child Bruttia?”

We're told that Commodus has been co-emperor since he was 15 - certainly a young age by modern standards, but rather par for the course in Roman times. However, that does not mean the pressure of being co-emperor wouldn't be a lot on 15-18 year old Commodus.

He is a teenager, after all. And he is a teenager that is rather abhorred to responsibility.

I didn’t mean to laugh at the expense of his distant wife…but part of me was pleased when he talked badly about her. I wanted all his attention for myself.

Oh, Apollo sweetie...you have issues too XD

Wanting to keep your lover's attention to yourself? Yeah, sorry Apollo, but that's not a good sign. This just goes to show that they are both toxic influences, and they brought out the worst in each other.

“I’ll make peace with the barbarians,” he said immediately. “Then we’ll go home and celebrate with games. The best games, all the time. I’ll gather the most exotic animals in the world. I’ll fight them personally in the Colosseum—tigers, elephants, ostriches.” I laughed at that. “Ostriches? Have you ever even seen an ostrich?” “Oh, yes.” He got a wistful look in his eyes. “Amazing creatures. If you trained them to fight, perhaps designed some sort of armor for them, they would be incredible.” “You’re a handsome idiot.” I threw another grape, which bounced off his forehead. A brief flash of anger washed over his face.

Leaving this here for future reference but we WILL be coming back to it!!!! In a future post!!!!

I knew my sweet Commodus could have an ugly temper. He was a little too fond of slaughter. But what did I care? I was a god. I could speak to him in ways no one else dared.

Apollo is the ONE PERSON who is able to challenge Commodus. And from the previous passage, we can infer Commodus is not used to it, even though he is well aware Apollo is the one with all the power in this relationship - although, he sure does like forgetting about that detail a lot lmao

Commodus looked at me, panic in his eyes. “Go,” I said, as calmly as I could, forcing down my misgivings. “You will always have my blessings. You will do fine.”

A sweet thing I find in this section is; 1) Commodus looks to Apollo for comfort, for some sort of it will be fine; and 2) that Apollo is encouraging despite his misgivings. Apollo is aware what kind of leader Commodus could be. He knows there is a high chance of his lover becoming a worse version of himself.

In fact, he even admits it;

But I already suspected what would happen: the young man I knew and loved was about to be consumed by the emperor he would become.

But he tries to go the you have my support, you have my love route. Romantic, but ultimately, it's not enough to keep Commodus from the path he goes down.

into the mouth of the wolf, Apollo says. Because this is the last time he truly sees the man he loved.

The next time they meet? It will be a crazed, paranoid tyrant he has to end - and in doing so, breaks the promise he once made.

He rose and kissed me one last time. His breath smelled of grapes. Then he left the tent—walking, as the Romans would say, into the mouth of the wolf.

This whole, entire scene? It's drenched in a tragic aura. It starts out light and teasing, but it ends with this.

This is their final kiss. This is the final time they get to see each other without the barrier of betrayal between them.

And that, is truly heartbreaking.

[rottenpumpkin13]

It’s time to upgrade the vehicle choice to the company helicopters. AGSZC and the Turks + Rufus, who is the best, the worst, and the one who can fly it but can’t land it.

• Sephiroth is an excellent pilot, probably the most competent you'll find. He learned to fly helicopters when he was very young, has a knack for handling even the toughest situations, and his composure and precise maneuvers make him the go-to pilot in any crisis.

*Sephiroth is flying the helicopter*

Lazard: You're going a little too fast.

Sephiroth: Have you ever considered crashing a helicopter, faking your own death, and then living on a deserted island with stray cats until you can repurpose the helicopter’s parts to build a weapon for exacting revenge on your enemies?

Lazard: NO?

• Genesis boasts that he's the best pilot around and can indeed fly fairly well. But he requires intense focus and hates any distractions. He will snap at anyone who tries to talk to him while he's flying. ....scratch that, it depends on the topic.

*In the helicopter, Angeal sneezes*

Genesis: DON'T TALK TO ME! I WILL FLY US INTO THE FUCKING SUN I SWEAR TO THE GODDESS! THEY WILL BE FINDING VESTIGES OF OUR CORPSES FOR YEARS! IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT?

Angeal: I think you should scream less.

*Genesis abandons the control*

Genesis: Did you just say loveless? Because I was thinking about the beauty of 'world's end' in act one, and—

Angeal: WE'RE FALLING

• It's a mystery how Angeal passed the pilot test, and even he's baffled why they keep entrusting him with the helicopter. He wishes they'd stop assigning him flying duties.

*Angeal is flying the helicopter*

Angeal: Are you sure I should be flying this thing?

Sephiroth: Of course. You're the responsible one.

*Angeal is flying the helicopter in circles*

Sephiroth: I trust you to land this helicopter responsibly.

*Angeal misses the helipad completely and is now doing zig zags*

Sephiroth: I value your responsibility.

*They are literally upside down*

Sephiroth: Land the helicopter, Angeal.

Angeal: LaNd tHe HeLiCoPtEr AnGeAl—WHAT DO YOU THINK I'M TRYING TO DO?

*And now they're flying into the side of the building*

Sephiroth: Meet the goddess.

• Zack is completely bewildered as to why no one trusts him to fly a helicopter. Sure, he might have driven a car into a ditch once, and maybe he accidentally set a motorcycle on fire, but he's confident in his flying skills! He insists he's super competent and is always ready to prove it—just ask anyone (except Tseng. Tseng hears "Zack Fair" and "helicopter" in the same sentence and has a nervous breakdown).

*In the helicopter*

Zack: Thanks for coming with me. For some reason, the other guys are too scared to fly with me.

Cloud, wearing a helmet, extra padding, and holding a rosary: WHAT DO YOU MEAN? WE CRASHED! WE'RE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE OCEAN!

Zack: Are you dead?

Cloud: No, but—

Zack: Success.

• Cloud's piloting skills are on par with Sephiroth's....though no one knew this until the first time he flew a helicopter.....Cloud doesn't have a license....people are confused and scared.

*Cloud is flying the helicopter*

Sephiroth: Strife, your piloting skills are excellent. Where did you learn to fly like this?

Cloud: Oh, I never learned.

Sephiroth: But you're flying the helicopter.

Cloud: Nothing gets past you, does it, sir?

Sephiroth:

• Rufus is adept at flying helicopters, but he rarely flies them because he has pilots and the turks to fly him anywhere he wants. He's also very stubborn.

Tseng: Sir, you might want to slow down a bit.

Rufus: I know what I'm doing, Tseng. I'll have you know that I fly better than most birds.

*Rufus doesn't avoid the incoming flock of birds and nearly crashes the helicopter into the building*

Rufus: ......

Tseng: They heard you.

[utilitycaster]

What is the d20 meltdown about? 👀 If you don't mind getting into it

I literally don't know other than vague shit because I'm semi-avoiding spoilers. I'm making this nonrebloggable because we're in pure speculation country.

From what I have gathered, people are mad because I think the Bad Kids kill the Rat Grinders (another adventuring group that's been set up as their bitter, jealous rivals from the start) and they want...redemption or some shit? This is absurd to me like this party was set up as The Enemy from the start.

I am 4 episodes behind so I can't speak to this, and also I admittedly have a rather low opinion of the D20 fandom at large for a number of reasons despite being a big fan of D20 shows, but: I just by chance watched the scene that I would say counts as a point of no return for at least some the Rat Grinders. Like, actually some of the most villainous shit I've seen on this show amplified by how petty and small and purely fueled by jealousy the motivation is.

My guess as to why the D20 fandom is, per whispers on the wind/texting my brother who is caught up/talking to friends not avoiding spoilers, having a meltdown about it is because people have this idea of Brennan Lee Mulligan always making capitalism the BBEG, or occasionally religion or politics.

That is untrue. He does hate capitalism, and that is a theme in the (real-world-ish set) Unsleeping City, but ultimately the thing Brennan sees as the villain is a willingness to hurt, exploit, and dehumanize others for your own goals and benefit. Capitalism and religious corruption are two major examples of this, but in the end, the worst thing you can do is kill people out of a desire for power, or attention, or spite. What Brennan truly hates is what we on Tumblr call a tar pit.

Now. My much more pointed analysis? Kipperlily (and presumably the other Rat Grinders) are deeply entitled people jealous of the Bad Kids, who aren't as academically strong at times but who have leveled up through saving the world at least three times. How many people does killing rats so much that you hit the high levels of D&D save? or even help? Like congrats, you're level 14 from killing rats real good. These guys stopped the fucking Night Yorb. Of course they get the fame and glory, you entitled, self-absorbed little brats. Do you not understand how this fucking works? This is underscored by the fact that they've definitely murdered at least one of their own and almost certainly two (and a teacher to boot) at least in part to get at the Bad Kids.

And herein lies my feeling as to why the D20 fandom is really melting down. Because the loudest and most unpleasant contingent (which is probably why the server is, ultimately, shutting down all discussion channels) have always struck me as entitled self-absorbed little brats who demand precisely what they want when they want it (and also have the literary analysis skills on par with the 3/4ths of a stick of Monterey Jack cheese currently in my fridge) and they're seeing, in real time, that in this story, they're the villain.

But: I haven't seen the next 4 episodes and I could be getting the details of the plot wrong (not the first 15 episodes though, and I do not think the Rat Grinders are going to make the world's best Heel-Face turn in 3-4 episodes, and at this point they're so clearly the villains that to deny it is to admit truly earth-shattering levels of stupidity) and so: nonrebloggable. I'm hoping to catch up this weekend though on both the show and the hot goss, and if I'm right this will become rebloggable.

ETA: I am caught up making this rebloggable but I'm actually more confused, because as my posts indicated this was not even like, edgy. Like I assumed maybe there was a twist where the Rat Grinders appeared to regret their actions or something but failed to do anything about it, making this a little bittersweet? but no there literally was nothing, they went into the final battle still like hell yeah we're going to be the living worst.

[lightningant]

I've never seen characterizations of Tom and Harry the way yours is. I love how neurotic and messed up they both are -- they're *SO CUTE* too. <3 <3 <3

Tom is just so exhausted and cynical and Harry is a manic catastrophe with sooo many crossed wires and they're HILARIOUS. XD

And just so well written, I cannot tell you how distracted I was for at least a week after I read what you had for your fic -- I truly, truly admire your narration and dialogue and characterizations (I already said that but PLEASE I LOVE THEM SO **BAD** >O< ) Soooo funny and well made.

They're realistic! Tom and Harry are so messy and also normal people at the end of the day who make mistakes and aren't super cool all the time (really, they're utter dorks, and you TOTALLY show thatt) but also they're competent and scary and stubborn and you just have suchh a nice blend of their facets and I JUST....aghhh, I love itt.

Also I ADORE your designs -- I love how Tom is so sickly and neat (you said it best "Victorian child with tuberculosis" LMAO), and Harry is so IDK, he's just a Guy but in the most wonderful way -- I'm not actually good with words :,))))

I just love your art style in general, it's like, realistic yknow. You don't get rid of normal people "imperfections", they're a part of the design or enhance them -- I don't think the word imperfections is right, I just mean like, you don't exclude non-conventionally attractive aspects of bodies or facial expressions??? Idk, I'm trying here, I really am. Just, just, just I like it a lot and I wanna be like that toooooo >.<

IIIIIIII dunno if I have accurately gotten anything across or even given an actual good compliment in this entire thing but anyways you're very cool and awesome and also PLEASE forget that I said they were Babygirl I've never used that word before in my LIFEE and don't know if that was right at all -- if it was nevermind I meant it all and am so cool -- ANYWAYS bye :,)

I don't think I've succeeded in lessening my embarrassment but uhhhhh, I hope I've at least articulated myself better :,)))

Askbomb swag. Thank you, this message was so sweet :) I shall try to match energies.

One of the things I love most is that the kind of person who puts up pretensions is, innately, trying to hide something about themselves they find sub-par. Tom isn't just a scary and incredibly powerful domineering sigma male who is a master manipulator, he is a person who is actively attempting to turn himself into that man, and in my fic he is still a teenager and still tripping his way through that mental image he has of himself. The two worst ages to ever be are 15 and 20; fifteen, when you are ready to shed childhood but don't know what maturity looks like just yet, and 20, when you are ready to become your own person and achieve adulthood, picking your way across existence-defining beliefs. And his only friend for the past like, 7 months? has been his 16-year-old self who has the single-minded objective of looking cool and mature to his adult self. A hell of his own making.

Harry is also 20. He is one of those 'unusually mature for his age' kids and he has an inflated sense of his own righteousness and capability, despite being the actual one with the emotional range of a teaspoon (he just knows to keep it himself). There is no way Harry would detect he is having a manic fit, especially if he is having one that is triggered by his arrested feelings on Sirius. It's incredibly fun writing him perform this extremely risky and reality-altering plan and his plan was "idk, kill him?" and picking shit up off the ground whenever he sees it, the DADA position included. our hero.

Beautiful tragic terminally ill gothic prince / fit jock is really a match made in heaven aesthetically. Cannot get enough of it

Thank you for art compliment too ^_^ I used to lean more to anime fandoms so Harry Potter really let me stretch my legs on more 'normal people' facial features like big noses and soft chins and I'm glad it's clear how much fun I'm having doing that. Yay! Though one of the compliments I've always gotten that I've always been proud of is how distinct the way I draw expressions is.

No no...you're right. Tom is absolutely a babygirl. And Harry...well he was certainly Ginny's babygirl, and I'm sure a part of him is really itching to have someone put their hand on the small of his back 😔

[eddieredmayneargentinablog]

"Eddie Redmayne: ‘I won a prize for worst performance of the year’

The Oscar-winning star of ‘The Theory of Everything’, ‘Fantastic Beasts’ and (gulp) ‘The Danish Girl’ is playing a hitman-for-hire in his new TV adaptation of ‘The Day of the Jackal’. He speaks to Adam White about famous friends, weathering backlash, and why the acting industry is ‘deeply unhealthy’

Source: Independent, Saturday 02 November 2024.

Eddie Redmayne said (excerpts):

“Often something you’ve done is just a part of a much bigger discussion, and you try to make sense of it with the understanding and comprehension of any human being.”

"You answer, you trip over, you get quoted, get misquoted, It’s all par for the course. But the way I explain it to myself is I’m just a f***ing actor. I wasn’t bred to be a politician, or a great speaker, or a particularly articulate advocate. I will, of course, sputter my way through [advocacy] for the things that I care about... but I’m just an actor.”

“There have been many years when I’d watch The White Lotus and go, ‘Why do I never get those jobs and hang out on beautiful beaches?’,” Redmayne laughs. “So I wouldn’t want to say that was the reason for taking the job, but it was pretty high up there. I’ve spent years playing Elizabethans and Victorians, or people in the 1920s or 30s. This was the first contemporary thing I think I’ve done in years. And it was nice to be able to just whip on a pair of trousers and a shirt every day, versus lots of 26-piece tweed suits.”

"At the audition, I put on my best ‘space emperor with mummy issues’ voice, and that was what came out – it was definitely a big swing".

"There was a moment in the Jupiter Ascending script that described the character’s voice. It said that his throat had been ‘gnarled out’, or something like that. So at the audition I put on my best ‘space emperor with mummy issues’ voice, and that was what came out.” The Wachowskis let him keep it for filming. “I had the most wonderful time making that film, but it was definitely a big swing. I do hear that there are people who are into [my performance], which is nice. Though I’m also conscious I have a prize somewhere for giving the worst performance of the year.” He chuckles. (It was Worst Supporting Actor at the 2016 Golden Raspberry Awards, if you’re curious.)

Does he read his own reviews? “Oh, yeah, absolutely,” he replies, without hesitation. He only finds it difficult to read them if he’s in a play, where they can’t help but impact what he’s doing night after night. “TV and film, though, often it’s so long since you did the thing that there’s a level of detachment from it. But the interesting thing about them is that I’d say most actors are harsher critics of themselves than any critic can be. It’s rare that I’m sitting reading a bad review of one of my performances, going, ‘No! They got it wrong!’ I typically sit there going, ‘Oh, yeah, I saw that too.’”

"I’m certainly more critical of my own work than most critics, I would say. So the reason I do this job is to aspire to those glimmers of something that momentarily feels real. “It sounds f***ing pretentious, but there are those moments, and sometimes they last for under a second, where you’re completely free, and you’re playing against someone, and everything is alive, and momentarily you go somewhere else.”

As for what’s next, Redmayne is unsure. Fantastic Beasts is “over, as far as I’m concerned”, so his diary is currently open. But he’s excited for the future. “I love variety, and I love pushing myself, and I hope to continue doing that,” he says. “I’ll always take a big swing, and...”

Full interview here:

[jarofstyles]

Stay Right Here - 4 the first touch

Things escalate.

Check out our Patreon for early access and exclusive writings!

Warnings: ABO, alpha Harry

——

The prince was flirting with her.

Often.

Y/N noticed it from day one but kept her professional demeanor, soft spoke and level word. She thanked him for compliments and even paid him some, but through the first two weeks he was starting to confuse her a bit.

The alpha was very insistent on closeness. He would take her smaller hand and show him tricks of palm reading he had learned while he was away, would brush hair from her face after she made the bed, would sit on the same side of the carriage if they took a journey, he asked her questions that had her blinking a few times.

Why did the prince care about her favorite colors? Her favorite snacks? It all seemed a bit confusing, but he was her boss so she answered regardless. It was a bit of a shock considering she never knew of anyone else to be treated as friendly as she was but he was taking to it naturally. Like it wasn’t something to be marveling at.

Every day she marveled at the fact that he had hand chosen her out of all people. He had barely been home for a day and she had somehow caught his eye, something every omega in the kingdom dreamt of- however, she was sure it probably wasn’t quite like this. Being his maid meant she kept her professionalism up to par the best she could. Eating breakfast with him every morning was a welcome but also worrying surprise. There was a seedling of fear in her chest every time that it was a test and it would get her booted from her job, or worse, kicked from the kingdom. She did have quite a vivid imagination, so she did know that perhaps she was overreacting, but the prince wasn’t necessarily known for his friendships with staff.

Regardless, Y/N was playing the role quite well. Maybe a bit too well, considering she had genuine excitement in her belly every morning. She was trying desperately to ignore the ping of warmth that rooted in her belly every time he touched her as well, but she was only able to do so much. A handsome alpha with a scent like his would send anyone into a tizzy, but… Y/N especially. She felt a bit crazy, even imagining scenarios where his touches didn’t stop. The worst part was that she wasn’t naive, she wasn’t oblivious. Despite the heated look in his eye at times that made her question if she was seeing things, there was no way that even if they’d done a single thing, that it could go anywhere.

A prince and a maid. No one would allow it.

—-

“Y/N, can you assist me please?” His raspy drawl warmed the back of her neck as she finished making up the bed. Her hand smoothed over the edges, making it tight and crisp. Fit for royalty.

“Of course.”

She turned to find him with his shirt unbuttoned, tanned skin on display. Something she hadn’t been expecting when she first started was the amount of ink on the prince. She knew of some, seeing it peek from his sleeve and on his chest, but seeing his bare torso was something she still found fascinating. The prince was a spectacularly beautiful creature. No one could deny it.

A harsh swallow brought her over to him, eyes again averting his gaze. The soft linen of his shirt was cool under her fingertips, Y/N wishing for a moment that she could experience a luxury like this on a daily basis. Soft clothing such as this. Hers weren’t exactly uncomfortable, no, but they were worn. Thin. She managed to dress them up the best she could, but she couldn’t waste money on clothing when they had people to feed, withering crop and a sick mother. Though the selfish part of her dreamed of the silks and cottons she helped put on to Harry every day, she knew her other needs were more important. Perhaps when her mother was healed, she would be able to afford a few nicer slips.

“You alright, little one?” He had been observing her getting lost in thought, her fingers stroking the material of his shirt. Harry had noticed this of her. Y/N got lost in thought quite frequently. Her pretty little head was stuck in the fluffiest clouds and he would beg on his knees to find out what she was up to in there. To take a peek. He’d been attempting but he also didn’t want to scare her off too quickly.

“Oh, yes.” She flushed, feeling heat in her face. “I apologize. I was just admiring your shirt. It’s very soft.” Her voice had a wistful tone to it that made him immediately want to strip and give it to her. Or better yet, let her stroke the fabric warm, over his skin. “It’s far softer than anything I own. I have to admit I’m envious, Sir.” That name seemed to sit well with him, despite his insistence on her casual behavior.

“Well, I can give you the name of the seamstress that produces this material. Perhaps you can get some.” He suggested, not really thinking too much of it. He would give the shirt to her if he thought she wouldn’t refuse.

“That’s very kind of you.” Her reaction hadn’t been what he expected. The little smile didn’t reach her eyes, her soft sigh and continuation of buttoning his shirt making him realize he had perhaps said something wrong. For someone who was so sure of himself in most ways, Y/N did have a way of unarming him. Making him second guess. A people pleaser.

“Did I say something wrong?” He asked softly, keeping his tone low as he looked down at her. He wished she would look up at him and let him take a peek into those beautiful eyes. His gut twisted a bit in nerves as she shook her head, nimble fingers doing up the clasps on the fabric.

“Not at all. I just don’t know when I’ll be able to do that. All my money is going to my mother and father to keep her medicated and the table fed. I don’t mind, not at all. It’s what family is for. I just…” she pursed her lips. “I long for the days she is healed and the farm thrives. The days I will be able to provide new clothing for myself and my family instead of worrying about keeping them alive.”

Harry felt a bit guilty for suggesting it now. He hadn’t thought every single penny was going towards that. The beautiful, kind woman who he had brought in to take up his days was spending all of her pay on her family. While he had noticed her dressed being worn and a bit tattered, it never once deterred from her beauty. Perhaps that was why. Still, a little rock of sadness sat in his stomach.

“May I have your eyes?” He requested, his fingers coming to her chin and tilting it upright. Y/N obeyed, as she usually did to requests, and his eyes locked on hers. There was a mix of emotion he could see but couldn’t quite place. The main thing he felt now was yearning. Yearning to take care of it without seeming too suspicious to her. Of her trust. Her devotion. Her body. He wanted her, all of those tattered dresses on the floor and ones he commissioned on her form. Her comfort.

“There we are. I apologize for my oversight and insensitivity towards your situation. It was not my intention.”he mumbled, daring to bring his thumb up to ghost over her bottom lip.

“It is a shame. You are such a beautiful soul, Y/N. You deserve to have the softest and most beautiful dresses. You will, one day. If you let me, I can help. Perhaps… it will take a bit more of your time, as i am a bit selfish with it.. but if you can devote more to me as these days are getting busier… I can see to you getting a raise. Maybe build your mothers medication into your payment.” He wanted to help. He didn’t want it coming from her paycheck. “It is rare to see such purity and kindness from a being. I see what you do…” he stepped closer, his palm engulfing her cheek. “Your extra bread to the children. Feeding the birds seeds. Helping with tasks that are not yours. I see your willingness to step in. Those are valuable qualities to me.” He had asked around quietly and found out more about her, but she didn’t need to know that quite so soon.

“I don't do those things to get rewarded, sir.” She said quietly, not moving physically from her place but finding her body relaxing into his touch.

“I know you don’t, little one. That’s what makes it pure. Why it should be rewarded.”

The energy had shifted. Y/N felt like she couldn’t breathe. This was an intimacy she hadn’t felt before in her life. The warmth of his palm holding her cheek like she was gold, his thumb over her lip, this was what lovers did. Not a position for a maid to be in with her prince, but she couldn’t get herself to move. She wouldn’t dare. Not when her body sang at the mere brushes and strokes of his fingers.

Her eyes ran over his face. The stubble was short, having just shaved, but his hair was still a tad messy with tendrils falling into his face and his eyes a deep green in the shadows of the morning light. He was so strickingly handsome it was intimidating, yet she couldn’t look away from him. His strong jaw and defined nose, every bit of him screamed fairytale hero, novel love interest, art muse, and she knew it was a privilege to see him so close, to have his hands on her body.

“I don’t…” she took a shaky breath. “I dont think being this close is appropriate. We keep… touching. And I don’t think its something that’s allowed.” Y/N had to say it. Had to cover her bases. Just in case. This was electrifying, terrifying. She had never felt more alive.

“Does it make you uncomfortable?” He questioned, his grip lightening but not yet falling away. Y/N felt herself want to whine, wanting the pressure back, and it terrified her- but she shook her head. “It doesn’t?” Again, she shook her head, unsure of how to work what she was feeling. “Then… I don’t think it is. It’s our business. You and I. I enjoy touching you.. being close to you, Y/N. Do you feel the same?” His head dipped down slightly making her heart lodge in her throat.

Oh, she was fucked. In deep, deep trouble.

“I…” she croaked. “I do, but I feel so guilty. You’re the Prince, I’m your maid. I’m just.. I do like it.” She tried to get out of the fog his presence but her under, to no avail. “I’m just afraid. I don’t wish to jeopardize my job, my life. I don’t want your reputation sullied either, god forbid someone sees.”

Harry hated to break to her that people already knew of his interest. It was not subtle in the slightest, the way his eyes trailed her and his warnings to others who tried to do the same. She accompanied him to a few events so far, to the town, and he kept her close. Closer than necessary. He didn’t need to, but he wanted to. Felt compelled to. His scent was all over her, lingering on her skin after she left. He did everything in his power to get hers on him as well.

“Let me soothe your worries, beautiful.” He tilted her chin back up to face him, his hand on her hip tightening to get her attention. “I am the Prince, yes. I will do as I please, so long as you aren't uncomfortable. As long as you consent to it. There is no guilt. No problems. If you feel uncomfortable in the slightest, I will back off. But I can tell you dont want to. Now that you confirmed that..” he took a breath and licked his lip, his mouth feeling a bit dry. “I will try to keep the affections to a private time. I know there are jealous employees here, they’re upset I chose you from day one. That is my problem to deal with. My reputation… it is fine. Do not worry about me. There is no danger to you job, wether you continue being my friend and companion or not. I will not be spiteful to you.” He would never take away her income because he wanted affection. He could be childish, immature, petty at times, but he never went too far. The idea of upsetting her was far worse than anything else.

He also didn’t want to say it out loud but it wasn’t as uncommon as she may think. Plenty of royals had affairs with their staff, but it hadn’t happened here too often. No one would really blink at it, but he hadn’t done anything of the sort. If people didn’t already think they were sleeping together from his attention to her, they would eventually- and no one could blame her. At least they shouldn’t, if they didn’t want to face Harry’s wrath.

“Do you swear it?” Y/N’s brows wrinkled as she lightly placed a hand on his wrist. Her first unprompted touch that had him keening, the bare skin contact making his heartbeat race. “You swear that… my job is secure, that you are secure? I do like being close to you, but its so hard to let go of my training. This goes against everything I’ve been taught. We aren’t even supposed to talk to you, look at you without being asked first.” She laughed ironically.

“I swear it, Y/N. Call me Harry in this room. When we’re alone. I want to be closer to you, sweetheart.” Any amount of closeness will do. He was working up to it, baby steps, but his patience had paid off with her hand on his wrist and her letting him cup her cheek. He could only imagine where they could go. Where they could work up to if they nourished their connection. He wasn’t under any false pretenses but he wanted to indulge. Y/N knew the score, so did he.

He just wanted to know her.

[kaythefloppa]

The Lion Guard: Song Ranking: From Worst to Best: [Part 3: #36-1]

Continuing from where we left off with Part 2 of my ranking of songs from The Lion Guard, as part of the decennial celebration. The third and final entry as we approach some of the best songs in the entire series.

Some things to keep in mind.

This is all my opinion, don’t banish me to the shadow realm.

The only songs I will include are songs from the episodes as well as the soundtrack. Songs from the Disney Junior musical shorts (such as the Circle of Life music video from two years back) are disqualified as they’re far more disconnected from the series proper than say, the songs exclusive to the soundtrack.

Background tracks from the one-hour specials that were officially released on Christopher Willis’ SoundCloud will be included in this list as well.

I am counting songs separately from their reprises. However, if a song appears in the end credits of an episode, I am counting it as the same entity as their episode counterpart.

Tumblr will not let me physically post this entire review because it is too large for its limits (which tests that of my own). This’ll be uploaded in parts and hopefully it should be finished before the month ends.

Finally…. I did the math. I had to listen to all 96 songs of the show. Not for the weak…

Word-vomit under the cut and away we fucken go!!

36: Make Way for Bunga the Wise

Wait, why is this actually catchy?

35: Bunga The Wise

NO FR WHY IS THIS ALSO CATCHY???

34: Lions Over All

Unpopular opinion… this MIGHT be on-par with My Lullaby…. No cap.

Unlike most people I don’t mind Zira’s recast. It’s no Suzanne Pleshette, but damn Futterman kills it, ESPECIALLY for the villains’ song. I love the blatant Be Prepared/My Lullaby references. I also liked the song expanding on Zira’s character, even if the episode is infamously messy and contradictory in terms of continuity.

The duet between her and Kion at the end is pretty nice as well. The effect of the shadows showing Zira as the more dangerous threat that domineers over Kion is so damn good.

33: We Will Defend

This is the perfect way to open up the final season, with a brilliantly subtle recap to the arc as shown in the previous season, cleanly transitioning into the final stage of said arc.

What I noticed about this song that no one else seems to mention is how the lyrics foreshadow the rest of Season 3’s story arc. Listen closely at 1:48 and 1:51, and you can hear the chorus saying “Moja Kwa Moja” and “Tuliza” respectively. This song hits the ground running for Season 3, and if it weren’t for the stiff competition that lies ahead, it would be the best damn opener to a Lion Guard two-parter ever.

32: Our Kupatana Community

If they can put Jackal Style onto the soundtrack, there is NO REASON why they couldn’t have done the same here. The vocalization, the subtle ‘Circle of Life’ references, the melody and harmony!!! AAH!!! Adore

31: I Do Have a Great Deal to Say

Yes, we all love the two re-animated bits from the original film in The Lion Guard’s animation and art-style. But this song is so much more than that!!!

For what it’s worth, it’s pretty much an “evil” or rather inversed version of Zazu’s song “The Morning Report” from the extended cut of the original (of which this episode is named after). Zazu sings about what he observes in the Pride Lands to an intended audience. To Mufasa, it’s involving animals, with occasional puns, to Janja and his hyenas, he involves pointless info about Simba whilst whilst wording his statements in a precise way to make himself seem reliable to the hyenas and evade punishment. Peak character writing and peak music. And don’t think I didn’t notice the creepy ass chorus near the end.

(Also the “sounds like he’s flat” joke from Bunga was funny enough to make me forgive the muted section of the song).

30: Tonight We Strike

I remember the very night where Return of the Roar came out and this song came to air. I swear to god those purple singing Hazbin-Hotel lookin' ass hyenas gave me nightmares for weeks. Even as an adult, it’s still a mind-fuck to see them.

Return of the Roar airing on the main Disney Channel allowed it to push more limits as opposed to the series proper on Disney Junior. Hence why the words “die” and “dead” are both verbally said in the pilot, and why this song is allowed to be as batshit acid as it could and I love it for that.

Also, to any “Lion Guard stops predators from hunting and are the bad guys!” Mfers, look to this song right here. It spells out everything that shatters that argument almost as much as Janja shatters the bones of his prey.

29: Long Live the Queen

I hate the reprise that this number, builds up to, but I love the original song, Long Live the Queen, in arguably the best regular-length S3 episode.

It does Rani’s character the justice of actual character focus and struggles with a proper set-up and resolve, and is a good way to end the episode after we open with Janna’s passing.

Also, if you listen closely, Nirmala’s singing voice sounds eerily identical to Fozzy Bear. Now you can’t unhear it either :))

28: May There Be Peace

Another song that I loved hearing in the episode’s promos and was twice as overjoyed to see in the episode’s proper. Whoever came up with the lyric “What’s inside matters so much more than feathers, fur or skin,” I salute you.

27: Ghost of the Mountain

I wish I had more to say about this song, but I love it. Very Halloweeny

26: Shujaa Ponda

Holy fucking shit they got Christopher Motherfucking Jackson to play this Hulk Gorilla on The Lion Guard and to sing as Hulk Gorilla on The Lion Guard and I fucking love it.

For a character with limited vocabulary, they had to be extra clever with the lyrics and they indeed were. Also, that vocalization is GODLY.

25: As You Move On

This song was ROBBED of an Emmy. Christopher Jackson and Heather Headley were a PERFECT duo here (Hi Broadway Nala!) and their performance was stellar. I was way more excited for this song than whatever the fuck the Scar Joker origin backstory song was turning out to be, and I was not disappointed.

Also little Makini is soul-crushingly adorable.

24: Beware of the Zimwi

Khary Payton is a worthy successor to Robert Guilllame in terms of both voice acting and singing. He pulls off this creepy ghoulish vibe that does this song a magnificent service.

23: Height and Sight

Again, words do not do this song enough justice. This song was the best part of the Season 2 finale.

Even though I think Anga needed more appearances in Season 2 before joining the main cast in the next season, this song does a good job at getting us invested in Anga’s character and abilities, as well as showing the really cute friendship between her and Ono: Two crucial details that will come in greatly hand for the climax of Season 2’s story arc.

It really soars, is what I’m saying.

22: We’ll Make You a Meal

The double-entendres in the song involving food were so good, I was almost rooting for Reirei to win. That’s how good this song is. Even though it’s a villains’ song, it sounds perfectly upbeat and camp, which fits Reirei’s manipulative nature.

21: Find Your Roar

I wouldn’t be surprised if this was a song pulled straight from Rhythm of the Pride Lands and/or is a straight-up deleted song from The Lion King. It arguably has the most feel and tone of the original movie out of every song on this list. I like montage songs, and this is an example (one of many on this list), that’s done right.

20: Jackal Style

The first Reirei song of the series…. AND THE BEST!!!!!

I like how the song doesn't actively *sound* villainous. Much like We'll Make You a Meal, if you hear the instrumentals, it sounds like a classic fun song, but the lyrics from the villains make it what it is, reflecting how the villains themselves are con-artists (and very so in this episode).

19: A Real Meal

I love how Mwoga glazes the fuck outta carrion when in Season 1, all he and his flock was trying to do is eat live animals.

Still, it’s one of those acid sequence Lion Guard songs where you love how camp and off-the-walls it can be. Plus, Cam Clarke is a good singer (he dubbed Simba’s singing voice in Simba’s Pride), he deserved to be at the forefront of a musical number.

18: Hero Inside:

This song reminds me a bit of Sisi Ni Sawa in tune, but I still like it. I love the chorus, accompaniment, and the overall moral of the song.

I think the show’s ending sours it a teensy bit. Imagine if Mtoto wound up succeeding Beshte as the Lion Guard’s Strongest at the end of the show after Beshte and co retire. Oh well.

17: Kuishi Ni Kucheka

I’m so glad that the Dan and Phil Gorillas didn’t actually have a full-blown musical number and that the actual musical department went to Beau Black and the Chorus for this song.

I find myself repeating this song over and over again because every single bit of it is an earworm. This episode aired when I was stuck at home sick with the flu, and seeing this kinda cheered me up, so maybe I'm more attached to the song than I should be, but regardless, it's a good song.

16: Stand Up, Stand Out

When Never Roar Again was delayed from its original air date, this song (or rather the shortened version that played on Disney Jr. music videos during commercial breaks) had me in a CHOKEHOLD. I loved it, and always found myself singing it.

I was glad to see the song in the episode proper, and it was way better. Fuli and Beshte’s accompaniment was also really welcome.

15: Life in the Pride Lands

Disney Junior loved to play music videos of this song. I would always get hyped seeing it show up and I would sing this at the top of my lungs.

Headphones are not enough for such an experience. I promise you. Also, Beshte's rap in this song >>>

14: Kion’s Lament

A somber song that involves our protagonist’s struggle with a neat break in between the end that transitions into a powerful uplifting moment. It’s glorious.

13: A Beautiful Day (Ni Siku Zuri)

The perfect song to kick off the new series and introduce us to our five main characters. This, I believe is the biggest strength of Return of the Roar and this song is essentially a full minute or so of that strength being shown to us both in visual and song form. Much like "I Always Wanted a Brother" from Mufasa: The Lion King, this is a song that deserved the constant attention it had during the promotions for the special (previews at D23, released clips online, promos, ect).

12: Big Bad Kenge

The last Ushari song in the series and it’s out with a BANG. I could not stop singing this song out loud on repeat, and this was simply from hearing it in the PROMOS.

Christian Slater nails every line of this song, every octave, every tune, and the hype for Kenge that this song is paid off by how badass Kenge himself is.

11. Fujo

I consider The Rise of Scar to be the true Season 2 premiere (as it was originally scheduled to be according to Kevin Schon) because of this song alone. It serves as a brilliant mirror to “A Beautiful Day” from the pilot episode, showing us the main characters’ interactions with the Pride Landers, only now, in a way to introduce us to the ‘new normal’ of the season. The intro, much like We Will Defend, has amazing foreshadowing, showing characters that will gain more importance in Season 2’s story arc. It also shows a painting of the Tree of Life, foreshadowing Season 3’s arc. The show gets really good once it heads into the dry season story in Season 2 and this song is a very good reason why it gets good.

10: Trail to Hope

I am including the episode version, extended version that was featured on several Disney Jr. promos back when th episode aired, as well as the end-credits’ version of this song all as one entity. A great way to kick off the top 10 list.

Alex Cartana, much like Beau Black, is an amazing singer for the series, and I’m surprised she didn’t get as many background songs as Beau Black did. It’s another song that would feel perfectly at home in the 1994 original film.

9: Sisi Ni Sawa

I call “The Rise of Makuu” the first song of the series since it was released on demand before its actual television airing, but Never Judge a Hyena By Its Spots was ‘technically’ the first episode in airing order. I mention that because the choice to have this be the first to air after the pilot and clear up the “not all hyenas are evil” thing was really smart, and nonetheless, my love for this song is purely because of how good of a message this is to aim towards children.

8: My Way

Best Fuli song ever. I can’t even come up with the right words for it, I am just in love with this song. I heard it in the promos for TLG’s soundtrack before the episode itself aired, AND listened to it on the soundtrack. I was the most excited for this song to come up, and was in musical heaven seeing it on the small screen.

I can also HEAVILY relate to Fuli as an adult, so there’s that.

7: The Legend of Scar

The Legend of Scar, is a piece by the Lion Guard Chorus that appears in Return of the Roar when Simba explains to Kion about the legend of Scar and his Lion Guard, as well as the fall-out between them. This piece appears regularly in the series proper, such as Lions of the Outlands or Return to the Pride Lands. A snippet of it also appears in the official trailer for Season 3.

The repeating Swahili chants, the tune gradually becoming more and more intense, the crescendo, and ESPECIALLY the haunting vocals at the end after the story is finished. I headcanon that the Lions of the Past sung this to Scar as they took the Roar of the Elders from him. It’s THAT freakin good.

The juxtaposition of the Lion Guard’s lemotif with the Legend of Scar theme at the end, which ALSO foreshadows Scar’s return in the Season 2 premiere! AAAAHG!!!

6: Flamingo Dance Party/Go Go Flamingo

This song should be a Tik-Tok dance. Why is this song not a Tik-Tok dance.

5: I Have a Plan

Real ones remember the Scar clickbait incident of 2017 where the promos tricked everyone into thinking this song was gonna be in The Rise of Scar, only for it to not be in the special, but in fact very next episode two weeks later.

But it was good clickbait because I love this song. It fucking slaps. In case you didn’t notice, he has a plan. Let him cook.

David Oyelowo was a perfect casting choice for Scar. He pulls off the perfect level of hammy for a villain of this show, and simultaneously the perfect amount of entertaining menace and malice that suits Scar’s character. The notes and the beat are all perfectly within his range, with hauntingly amazing visuals. Nowhere near the level of Be Prepared, but still really fun.

4: On The Last Night

This is the best character sung song. It encapsulates everything we've come to know and love about the main characters as they reach the end of their journey. As much as I'm still mad at how Max Charles' singing was recasted, I'm twice as happy that the last song he got to sing before the series closed.

3. It is Time

I remember hearing this song in the promos for Return of the Roar and the main show and I wondered what it was, or where it even came from. I soon learned that this was featured on the soundtrack and was basically what inspired Kion's Lament.

I repeat. Beau Black is a musical GOD. So much life and energy is put into his performances and it all just adds beautifully to what the show is about. I'd argue that this song could've been in the finale [entry #1 non-withstanding]. There are already two variants of it in the series proper. Plus Beau Black has enough singing and vocal range to dub an Adult Kion singing, and it would be thematically appropriate for the show, and Kion's character in general.

2. Call of the Guard

I wasn't expecting this to be the theme song for the show, but I was pleasantly surprised. The actual theme for the series proper does a very good job at setting the stage for what's to come in the episode. The soundtrack version is what largely gets this this onto the top three. MAN is it good. It starts off calm and mysterious before swelling into grandiose., with the chorus being divided evenly in half. By the time it ends you feel so satisfied. I'm very glad we get to hear bits and pieces of it in both the movie pilot and the series proper.

1. Here Comes the Lion Guard

I'm very jealous of all the people at 2015's D23 expo who got to see this song be performed live by Beau Black and the Lion Guard chrous.

But seriously, lives were changed. The earth shook.

If you've at all even gone within an arm's length of The Lion Guard, whether you watched the show when it was on the air and saw it in the outros, seen promos of it on Disney Jr, watched the show online, or even saw some clips on YouTube, there's a good chance you've heard of this song in any capacity.

I said it before and I'll say it again. Beau Black was the perfect choice for the musical talent behind this show. So many songs on this list, but especially this one just prove that point. It retains the same African vibe that flows through the franchise, is upbeat enough to be welcome for the show itself, the Swahili chorus, lyrics, and Beau's vocals are all breathtaking, and all topped off with the instrumentals. And the outro versions of the song (both in Return of the Roar and in Seasons 1-2 of the show) are brilliantly edited to where you can still enjoy it in its own right. Also, shout-out to Disney Jr. for reworking the post-credits scene from the pilot into their actual promo for the show.

I actually think the song could've worked as the intro to the show, because for all Call of the Guard manages to successfully pull off, Here Comes the Lion Guard manages to do that twice as well as an entry point to the series.

Alternatively, I would've easily accepted it being reworked into the series proper. The hill that I will always die on is that Here Comes the Lion Guard should've been the final song of the series. If they didn't have the budget to compose one last original song, then they should've went for this to be recycled for the finale. It would compensated for the song being axed as the Season 3 outro, and it would've better made the series come full circle. Plus I know for a fact Diamond White would've absolutely eaten up the final Walinzi Wa Simba! lyrics.

If you ever decide to tell your friends about The Lion Guard, or show it to your children someday, introduce them to this song. The show itself may not be perfect, but this song is.

And there you have it. My official ranking of every Lion Guard song. Lots of calculations (and errors thereof), as well as all-nighters were pulled in the making of this ranking and it's fucking worth it.

Happy [early] 10th anniversary to The Lion Guard!

[t4nxos]

Another Namgyu themed post because I love my girl, what can I say?

This is my (PERSONAL! PERSONAL!) ranking of Namgyu—themed ships, best to worst, with reasonings behind them.

1. Thangyu —- I fucking love Thangyu. If you scroll on my account you’ll be able to see that. I love the toxic codependency of it, I love how Namgyu cares way more about Thanos, I love how he has to navigate the games without Thanos being there beside him, I love it. I cannot see this being a domestic ship simply because of the toxicity of it; the fact of the matter is that it’s unrequited, and if it were ever canon, Thanos wouldn’t take the relationship seriously at all. I genuinely think that Namgyu was in love with him. Nearly perfect toxic ship, but a lot of Thangyu fans mischaracterize it and completely ignore the dynamic.

2. Thangyusu —- I fucking love this ship, particularly within AU formats. Everything about it is literally perfect to me; the jealousy from Namgyu, the obsession with how adorable Minsu is from Thanos, and the wtf is going on thoughts within Minsu’s head. The bathroom scene awakened the possibility of this ship within my head, and I’ve watched it stay underrated for far too long. I’m also extremely jealous of Minsu within the context of this ship, because god, I wish that were me. If I could write, I would make a million fanfictions were Minsu gets spitroasted and then immediately cuddled and fussed over by Thanos while Namgyu sits in the corner and sulks about how much of a baby Minsu is. This ship, like I said, is particularly good within the context of normal life outside of the games, since I think it can be explored far more. I just want to see all three of them cuddled up like sardines.

3. Namsu —- If their numbers touch, so do they. 124 and 125, baby. Namsu is one of those ships where I think one of the characters is used as an emotional (and physical) punching bag for the other. You’re telling me Namgyu wouldn’t constantly beat on Minsu for ‘causing Thanos’ death’? With the way that he looked up at him after Minsu threw that bottle at his head, I’m kind of scared for their potential interactions within season three. I think Namgyu was jealous of how much Thanos seemed to care for Minsu; I think more people need to translate that jealous rage into fanfictions between the two of them. I can imagine Namgyu getting so mad at Minsu that he practically forces him to fuck him, and threatens to beat his ass if he doesn’t. Bonus points for Minsu being a secret pervert and putting Namgyu in his place. Also, props to Thanos for creating the Namsu ship name.

4. Semgyu —- Controversial, maybe, but I can fuck with this ship if it’s done right. I think a lot of fans automatically assign Semi as being a lesbian and Namgyu as being gay —- which, by the way, there’s nothing wrong with that —- and I generally agree that Namgyu probably favors men significantly more, lol. Sort of on par with that thought, Namgyu would never ever wear the pants in this relationship. Ever. Anyone who thinks Semi would let Namgyu boss her around in literally any way is delusional and she would have him by the balls, easily. I really like the physical aesthetic of this ship; I think both of them really compliment each other, especially in the bts pictures with Jian and Jaewon. Basically, Namgyu is her bitch, because that’s what he deserves. When this dynamic is explored correctly and without unnecessary misogyny, this is actually an enjoyable ship for me.

5. Gyeongsu/Namgyu —- I really couldn’t think of the ship name for this one. Namgyeong? Gyegyu? I don’t know. This is an extremely rare ship that I have seen almost nothing about, which sort of surprises me, considering the fact that Gyeongsu was a part of Thanos’ group and canonically interacted with Namgyu at least a few times. Unfortunately, though, I really can’t see this one. I think Namgyu would get way too annoyed at Gyeongsu openly fawning over Thanos (even though he feels the exact same way inside), and the series really doesn’t show us enough clips of them interacting for me to properly have an opinion on it. I think it’s definitely less horrible than the last two ships, and it has potential, but I wish we could have seen more with them. Actually, we should have seen more with Gyeongsu in general. Shame what happened to him. Rest in peace my boy.

6. Daegyu —- Why? Rarepairs are a thing, and they are especially a thing in this fandom. I don’t understand this one and I never will. Namgyu would be more than pissed off to have to deal with some overly—optimistic person all of the time. I genuinely can’t even see a reason for them to interact in the first place, much less in a shipping kind of way. I think Daeho would be either too scared to approach Namgyu or too stupidly cheery. I still do not understand this one. Is it because they both have long hair? I’m confused. It’s bad. It lacks any sort of structure.

7. Namggi —- Words cannot describe how fucking horrible this ship is. Arguably worse than Thanggi. I fucking hate MG Coin more than anything, so I’m definitely biased, but even trying to push that aside, this ship makes absolutely no sense to me. Why would Namgyu fuck someone who literally ruined his life? MG Coin is the whole reason he’s in there in the first place, same as Thanos. Secondly, MG Coin killed Thanos. Why would he ever forgive him, much less want to screw around with him after that? All interactions between the two of them are negative, and not in a ‘oooh sexual tension’ sort of way. Both Namgyu and Thanos genuinely hated MG Coin with everything they had. There was no secret lust there. I hate this ship so much that I hope Namgyu skins him alive in season three.

[writingseaslugs]

Pomefiore: When You're Sick

I have no idea what I just wrote. Genuinely I think I got possessed for this part and I just started typing words. So I apologize if it isn’t up to par with my normal content, I just…wrote. I also got off work not long ago and it’s getting late though, so perhaps it’s the sleep deprivation talking. 

As always, the intro to this part is the same as the others, so feel free to skip it if you’ve read it before!

Disclaimer: All characters in this series are aged up. For more information about my version of this world and the type of reader you can expect, please click the “Au Information” below!

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Pomefiore: When You’re Sick

The worst thing to ever happen to you while attending Night Raven College had to be, hands down, getting sick. You were alone in the dorm with only ghosts and Grim to keep you company, and as much as you loved them, they couldn’t take care of you when you became sick. This meant you had to make do and hope that everything was alright. Normally if you were under the weather, you’d just suck it up and go to class so as to not worry anyone. This time however, that wasn’t an option.

You woke up with every muscle in your body feeling sore and aching with even the slightest movement. Your stomach churned something fearsome and you had a runny nose and cough to boot. You had no idea what illness you had fallen to. Having so many symptoms…you could only assume it was the flu or something akin to that.

Still, there was no way you were making it to class like this. So begrudgingly you told Grim you weren’t feeling good and needed to rest, and to go to class and get your homework so you could do it later. The demon cat was grumpy about not having his henchman, but eventually gave in, leaving you alone to rest in your room and hope that whatever you had would go away.

Vil Schoenheit

When Vil finds out you’re home, sick, and all alone, he’s going to just sigh and shake his head at the news. He’s already checking his schedule and shifting things around as he goes and gets you some medication before heading over. He can’t let you be sick too long, so he’s going to do what he can to help. When people in the dorm find out that Vil is going over to your dorm to help you while sick, they’re all shocked. Most people in Pomefiore just let others suffer while sick so they themselves don’t fall ill, so to think Vil is going to run such a risk is unheard of.

As with everything, Vil is pretty adept in taking care of others. While he doesn’t have to do it too often, he knows how to do it, so there’s a plus. He will, however, keep his distance if he can, and not stay the entire time you’re sick. He can’t run the risk of falling ill as well, so he’s going to do what he can to help you, then leave until you need him again. Don’t hold it against him, getting sick as an actor and model isn’t exactly an ideal situation.

While he doesn’t stay by your side the entire time you’re sick, he will be on call for you. If you need anything, all you need to do is pick up your phone and give him a call. He’ll be over as soon as possible, and if he can’t come at that moment, he’ll send either Rook or Epel to help you out. He does make sure the medication you take is the best money can buy, and he’s giving you some face care and making sure you're hygienic while dying in bed, so at least you won’t feel gross while being sick. Vil says being clean can help you feel a bit better mentally.

Vil is relieved when you get better, especially if he didn’t get sick at all while taking care of you. He’s treating you to a spa day without a doubt in order to make sure you’re feeling 100% again. He acts as though he wasn’t concerned the entire time, but anyone close to Vil could tell he was besides himself with worry.

Rook Hunt

He probably found out you were sick before Grim did, he could tell by how you were acting the day before that you would probably be coming down with something. So as soon as Grim is leaving your dorm by himself, Rook knows he was spot on and is already messaging Vil that he wouldn’t be in class today, as one of his flowers is wilting and needs to be cared for. Thankfully he also made sure to grab a few things before visiting you that morning to check in, so he already has what he needs.

Rook is pretty perceptive with the needs of others around him, so taking care of someone isn’t really a struggle. He knows how to make sure others will recover, and normally he’s one of the few in the dorm who’s willing to help someone when they’re sick. Not to mention his immune system is out of this world, so he doesn’t really have to worry about getting sick as it happens so rarely. So good news for you, Rook can spend all day with you and you don’t have to worry about accidentally getting him sick.

He’s going to be making sure you’re well fed and take your medication, not to mention getting the proper rest. While he’s not as anal as others, he still wants you to get better as soon as possible so he doesn’t need you to overexert yourself. Still, if you want to get up by yourself to take a shower by yourself, he won’t kick up a fuss. He will be sitting in your room, waiting patiently to make sure you didn’t pass out in the shower though. Overall, he’s an amazing nurse who isn’t overbearing and when you’re awake he’ll tell you stories to keep you entertained.

Once you're better, Rook will be off doing his normal thing again. However, he will be checking in on you more to make sure you really are feeling well. He’s also going to be insisting you have lunch with him for a week or so, making sure you’re eating well to prevent yourself from getting sick again. It isn’t an excuse to have you all to himself, he swears it. The good news is the food is good, and Rook is amazing company to boot when he’s not stalking others or going on about Neige.

Epel Felmier

He’s going to hear about it from Grim after he asks where you were. With how Grim described it, Epel is feeling uneasy about the situation. He’s riddled with worry and is wondering if he should visit you, or just let you rest. After Rook notices Epel’s distress, he’ll nudge him towards visiting you, even giving him a grocery bag filled with the necessary items for you. After getting the “go ahead” by his vice dorm leader, he’s off racing to Ramshackle to check in on you.

While taking care of others isn’t something he’s used to doing, he knows how to do it. Going all the way to the doctor’s in his small town wasn’t normally an option for things like flus and colds, so he knows the best at home treatments for these things. While some might be unconventional, like saying if you slather your feet with a vapor rub, it’ll bring out the toxins in your body, some of them were actually pretty helpful in making you feel better.

Epel is thankfully equipped to handle anything with the items Rook had packed for him, so there’s no need to worry. He knows what everything is (for the most part) so he just had to read the labels to find out when you needed to take the medication and give it to you at the proper times. He also knows how to make a mean chicken noodle soup thanks to his grandma, so he’ll be making you some of that to help you feel better. He also won’t be leaving your side often while you’re sick, opting to just sit and relax in your room while the others can’t disturb him. Not to mention it helps him skip out on lessons with Vil, so it’s helping both of you out.

Epel is going to be asking you multiple times if you’re sure you’re feeling alright, and if you need him to stay longer once you’re better. It’s obvious to anyone he’s trying to avoid Vil, so as thanks for helping you out, just go along with it. Say you’re still feeling weak so he can help you out for a bit longer and get Vil off his back. You won’t owe him anything if you can manage to get him out of those horrible lessons. Still, Epel is genuinely worried about you even once you’re better, so it’s not just him trying to skip out on stuff. Besides, he feels a small bit of satisfaction when he helps you carry your book bag to your different classes since “Your muscles just ache so badly still from that darn flu.”