#the way she talks about the books and characters makes it clear that she didnt understand them at all 😭😭😭

[purpleshadow-star]

I'm watching this girls review/talk about all of the Percy Jackson books, and tbh I've never seen someone with so little media literary. She's turning me into a Jason Grace defender, and I don't even care for Jason that much.

[the-acid-pear]

just finished a video on no longer human. It really do be like that

[iouinotes]

All for you | Carl Gallagher

pairing: Carl Gallagher x female!reader

show: Shameless

warnings: angst, fluff, smut (the reader and Carl are 18 years old in this ff)

summary: Carl is challenged that he can get your money, if he makes you fall in love with him. He loves the challenge until he loves something else more...

authors note: sorry for so many pov switched, I didnt notice it, when I first wrote this ff. Also I haven't had the chance to watch all the seasons yet, but I still hope that Carl's character is somewhat accurate :))

Carl's pov

"Frank, goddamit youre no help! Why are you even lying around here - oh forget it, I don't want to hear it." Fiona's voice echoes in the room, while the entire Gallagher household is present.

The everyday discussion has been going on for too many minutes in which I could have done something better. The damn question “How do we get enough money?”

Lip at college, Ian with his gangster boyfriend, my shitty sister with her kid and then Liam. This family is screwed. No wonder with a father like Frank.

As the argument continues to escalate, I have the misfortune of sitting right next to him.

"You care to share some money, son?" Of course, my attempts to ignore him are unsuccessful.

"The drug trade doesn't always work out so well, but the weapon thing was something. You could give one to your good old dad, you know what the neighborhood is like." I run my hands through my hair in frustration, shaking my head.

"Just get one or two girls pregnant at school, then all of our problems are solved. But she has to be rich. After all, you want to get your hard work paid." Why the hell am I still here?

"You used to be more enthusiastic about my ideas. If you don't want to do play daddy, then use your charm. When I was your age, my cock was enough and the girls were happy."

"Be fucking quiet, no one wants to hear about your pathetic youth." It's no use, he keeps talking.

"I'm only saying, If you make a rich girl fall in love with you, then you can get money to do something nice for your family."

As I get up and walk away from him I take a breath, the tension caused by this idiot sucks.

Still, his words got me thinking. Maybe there's a new girl who would be perfect for this job...

🔗🔗🔗🔗

Your pov

When I moved here, I wasn't sure what to expect. New school, maybe mean classmates and bad cafeteria food. That I might be able to join a group and make friends, people who laugh with me in class or go to the cinema together on weekends.

I was prepared to get lost in the hallways a few times, perhaps to be peppered with embarrassing questions by the teachers. I had even prepared myself for being called a nerd again and therefore spending my lunch breaks alone.

Then things turned out differently. I met two girls who, although they scared me at first with their need to gossip all the time, are good people at heart.

They studied with me (meaning they told me the newest gossip and braided my hair while I did our homework), showed me the city and its pitfalls. I felt comfortable, prepared and confident for what awaited me here.

Oh lord, was I wrong.

On a Thursday in the middle of the week I met a boy who messed everything up. Literally.

I met him when he was running through the halls twenty minutes late, but stupidly didn't pay attention to me, who was about to cross his path. Let's put it this way, it ended with my books on the floor, my jacket hanging off my shoulder, and his hair being a huge mess.

When he looked at me, I expected to hear something like "sorry" or "I'll help you."

You want to know what he said?

"Cute top. Let me know if you need help taking it off."

Then he got up casually and walked into the classroom across the hallway, a grin on his face as if he had won the Bachelor title.

After this encounter two things became very clear to me. 1. Look both ways when crossing the halls and 2. Stop daydreaming about this boy, even if he has beautiful blue eyes.

The first thing worked better than the second.

After a few descriptions, which actually only consisted of "incredibly impudent and incredibly good-looking", it was explained to me who I was dealing with.

Carl Gallagher. A boy who has lived here since he was born, someone who is rumoured to be more dangerous than the Italian Mafia.

Even though I thought that was exaggerated, I quickly realized that I should stay away from him and that he meant trouble.

Aside from the fact that I wasn't going to be in the situation of talking to him again anyway, my eyes couldn't stop themselves from looking at him.

There was something that defined him, something that made me want to watch a grin creep across his face when he made an inappropriate joke, how he would push his blonde hair back and his eyes would shine mischievously, as if he had already planned the next bank robbery.

I wasn't the only one who found his charisma attractive tho, of course not when he looked like one of God's angels, but he never really seemed interested in other girls. At least not with any serious intent, you might hear him flirting or making comments about his free bed, but you would never saw him in a relationship.

He never held hands or kissed anyone, had a real smile on his face or said sweet things, he was just Carl.

Suggestive, hot-tempered and like a flag that proclaimed: Stay away from me, because you will lose this fight.

I also felt that if I continued to watch him, I would lose the battle for platonic feelings towards him too.

"Please don't tell me you're looking at our school bad boy again. You better be careful, he might want to sell you a gun." Kenzie's voice makes me sigh.

"These are just rumors. Besides, it's not my fault, he's just -" Her hand on my shoulder interrupts me.

"We know, you have heart eyes every time you talk about him. There are so many great guys in this world, I'm not saying at this school, but you choose this one?" Her look says more than a thousand words as she looks over at Carl, who is pushing his way trough the crowd.

"I'm not in love, just curious. Those are two different things, okay?" Her eyebrows raise.

"You mean, curious how his lips would feel on yours?" Her laughter at my expression is lost in the sounds of the cafeteria.

"Very funny." I murmur to her, food forgotten on my plate. When the school bell rings, I stand up and pick up my backpack.

"My class is canceled now, but I'm going to the library. Will you meet me later?" As I walk backwards I see her thumbs up and the hearts she makes in Carl's direction. My reaction is two quick middle fingers.

As I walk out of the school building, I check my phone and tie my hair into a braid. The library is a few blocks away and the cool air makes me shiver.

When I get there and wave to the boy at the entrance, I turn to my favorite department. Call it cliche, but I love romance books. I mean, I don't know what it feels like to love someone with all my heart, but that doesn't mean I don't love reading about it.

The books I actually need are a few rows away. History, literature, everything I am assigned to get for school.

As I stroke over a few tapes and finally pull out a book to read the first few pages, I hear a noise next to me that makes me look up. After all, the library is usually a pretty quiet place.

As I look into the familiar blue eyes, I feel my cheeks turn red.

I have to stop myself from staring.

"Always a book in your hand, I see." Oh his voice hasn't changed. I try to shrug casually as I answer, but I'm not sure if it actually works.

"Aren't you going to be late for class again?" At my sarcasm he smiles, he takes a step in my direction which weakens my control over my voice.

"I thought I would learn something somewhere else too." These coded words make me swallow.

"So, you're here often?" I almost think he's not answering me, but maybe I'm just not concentrating, because I'm paying too much attention to every mole on his face.

"Actually, I didn't even know this shitty town had a library." His words make me laugh, but several requests to be quiet around us, make me whisper in response.

"Then why are you here?" I think my breathing stops as his hand brushes my fingers that are still holding the book.

"You're here." I feel my heart beating nervously faster, I probably look pretty confused and when I notice his grin, something flutters in my chest.

"No interest in books, huh?" Can my answer actually be any lamer?

"Dont worry, I have a newfound interest in you."

🔗🔗🔗🔗🔗

Your pov

If someone had told me a few weeks ago that I would become friends with Carl Gallagher, I would have found the idea absolutely crazy. To be honest, I still find the situation insane, but damn my cheeks still turn just as red when he's with me as they did the first time.

It turns out that he really has no interest in books, even though he visited me at the library almost every day since we met in the romance department.

I've never met anyone like him, funny and couragous without any reserve, always looking for trouble, acting self-confident. But also sweet.

He's like a current that pulls you along, like a wind that blows so hard that you fly with it. He feels like freedom and it is wonderful.

He makes me laugh, he carries my books, plays with my hair, walks home with me. In such a short time I feel like he didn't knock on the doors to my heart, instead he made a home there.

Maybe this is what it feels like to fall in love.

It's not a gentle announcement, more of a realization that makes you incredibly desperate and happy at the same time.

But with him I actually just feel happy.

"Ready, sunshine?" As soon as I come out of the classroom, he comes towards me and takes my bag from me. My heart jumps at his gesture, which feels like winning the Olympics.

"You're crazy, where do you even want to go?" He has something planned but won't tell me. When he puts his arm around my shoulder and I lean against him, I get a few sideways glances from our classmates.

Carl ignores everyone like always, it's crazy but the way he's so confident is pretty attractive to me.

"Does the guy in your cheesy books also tell you where they go on dates? I bet not, so just wait."

🔗🔗🔗🔗

"It feels like you're kidnapping me."

I feel his smile on my back and have to giggle quietly at his response.

"Mh, I plan to do that. But only for a few hours, otherwise my head will roll tomorrow. Your father takes your curfew pretty seriously."

I feel his hands on my hips, guiding me forward, hear the birds chirping around us, but can't figure out where we're going.

"Just a few more steps, baby. Then you'll see." As he promised, it is only a few meters away and when I see a small, calm lake, my mouth falls open in surprise.

"Carl, oh my God! It's wonderful here, thank you so much." I turn around in his grip and look at him, his smile reflects the love that I feel.

"Yeah? How much do you like it?" As his eyes focus on my lips, I feel a tingling feeling in my stomach. Slowly, my fingers stroke his chest and I see him swallow, even though he tries to hide it.

"I think it's incredibly beautiful here, I love it. And...I really like you." I shyly lower my gaze, my words are met with an unknown silence that makes me anxious after a few seconds. But when I look up at him again, he pushes a strand of my hair out of my face.

"To me, you are much more beautiful than this sight. I like you too and I thought that was pretty obvious." I smile broadly, butterflies fly around in my stomach and as the sun illuminates his face, I feel incredibly happy.

"You're so nice to me, I don't know how I deserve this." An expression crosses his face, but when I blink he smiles at me again.

"After all, you are the first person who explained the topics for the history exam to me, without giving up." My hand cups his cheek.

"I wouldn't give you up, you've become too important to me." As I stand on my tiptoes, our lips brush, his hand is on my back and pushes me closer to him.

"You are an angel." With his words we kiss and everything else around us blurs, only he remains. Everything is unimportant except him, standing in front of me, so handsome, that it is difficult not to look at him.

"Come on, let's go for a swim." As he pulls me towards the lake, you can hear our loud laughter in the air.

🔗🔗🔗🔗

Carl's pov

"When are you going to collect the money? You've been with her for the last three months and nothing has come of it." Frank's annoying voice frustrates me more than anything else.

"I am working on it. Besides, she's actually really caring." When I see the dismissive hand gesture in my direction, I roll my eyes.

"You are completely wrong, son. A person is there for a certain period of time, but money? Money accompanies you throughout your life, especially if you buy beautiful bottles of the best alcohol."

I sink into the sofa, but want to turn away when I feel his hand on my shoulder.

"If you put it off any longer, it will be harder to get out of the situation. Girls your age will start planning to get married, if you stay with them for months."

But when he leaves, I feel conflicted. Can I really do this to her?

🔗🔗🔗🔗

Carl's pov

"Happy birthday!" Her voice makes me jump and, confused, I turn around on the bench to look into her excited eyes.

"Why are you jumping around like that? Are you practicing for cheerleading?" I'm making fun of her, but the smile on her face doesn't fade.

"No, idiot. I'm just really curious to see how you react to your gift." My breath catches for a moment as I take in her words.

"You got me something?" When she leans forward and gives me a kiss on the cheek while pressing the bag into my lap, I start to smile too.

"Open!" Her encouragement breaks me out of my trance and I quickly tear up the paper, looking at the tickets with wide eyes.

"But...these tickets cost a fortune? Did you sell your liver or something?" When I look at her, she smiles back at me.

"I talked to my dad and he agreed that you deserve something special for your birthday. Are you happy?" As I look at the cards, I suddenly feel a pang in my heart. It must be showing on my face, because her happiness is also fading away.

"Do you not like it? I thought it was your favorite team? I can get you something else." When I look at her, I quickly pull her between my legs and kiss her.

"Shh, breathe angel. It's perfect, thank you. And well, your father. It's just a lot of money." Her hands play with the fabric of my shirt.

"You always say that. Do you have problems at home, with money, I mean? I've never been to your place, I don't even know where you live." What should I say to her now?

"It's okay." Her raised eyebrows look at me reproachfully, making me sigh.

"Each of us has to contribute a certain amount of money every month and if I don't sell fucking drugs, it will be tight." Her astonished look makes me pause and I gently stroke her arms.

Before I can say anything else, she kisses me. I look at her in surprise.

"What's that for?" She smiles shyly, looks at the floor for a moment before looking at me again.

"You're just so honest, I admire that. And that you've never asked me for anything, you know. That I lend you some money."

Fuck. Shit. What do I say?

"Yeah, I mean, I don't want to burden you with that-" but she interrupts me again, her concentrated expression makes me curious.

"What's going on in your pretty head?" My hands wander over her sides.

"It's the end of the month, how much are you missing?" I frown in confusion, but when she doesn't let it go, I tell her the amount.

"$240, the rest I earned by helping in the neighborhood." But despite the high sum, she just nods, looks at me again and gives me another kiss.

"Okay, maybe I'll be your sugar mommy." I have to laugh at the absurdity, but the longer she grins at me, the more I think she means it.

"What, are you serious? Thats fucking crazy, how am I supposed to pay you back?" Her eyes look around, but since the classroom is relatively empty during recess, she finds herself between my legs again. She slowly lets her hand wander down my stomach until she squeezes my cock through my clothes and I close my eyes in delight.

"Hmm, maybe you could help me relax between classes." Her eyes sparkle mischievously and I look at her with a grin.

"Anything you want, sugar."

Let's put it this way, the next few weeks the breaks were filled with kissing in the back corner of the classroom, dry humping on the toilet or Carl doing his best to pleasure me with his tongue in the caretaker's room, like now.

"Ahh-, Carl. I'll cum if you keep that up." His head has disappeared under my skirt, his fingers are stroking the bare skin of my thigh and the sinful movements of his tongue are making me see stars.

As he adds a finger and runs it over my folds, slowly until he inserts it, he looks at me again.

"You coming for me? Yeah, be a good girl or do you want to get caught by the old janitor grandpa spreading your legs for me?" As my eyes roll back, he pumps another finger into me, scissoring it thoroughly and hitting that sweet spot inside me.

When I moan loudly, he grins.

"You like that? Just wait until I bury my cock in you and you cant walk straight afterwards, so that everyone will notice." When his finger presses my clitoris, I see white and as I come I try to muffle the sounds with my hand over my mouth.

When I get off my high, I blindly search for my panties. But Carl beats me first.

"Hmm, no. I think I'll keep it as a little souvenir. Maybe you can get it back when you come to my house later." I don't know what surprises me more: that he wants me to run around exposed at school or that I'm invited to his house for the first time.

"Really? I'd like to come." But he interprets my words differently, his fingers stroke my entrance again and I moan and squeeze my eyes shut.

"Don't worry, I'll take care of it. Very well and for a very long time." When the bell rings, he lets go of me and I whimper slightly.

"Carl-" but he interrupts me by pulling back and straightening my skirt.

"I'm sure our agreement was between recess, now it's class time. Come on, I'll make it up to you later."

🔗🔗🔗🔗

Your pov

As we ride the bus toward his home, I take his hand and intertwine our fingers.

"But don't expect a mansion or any of that shit." Ever since we left school, he has been bad-mouthing his hometown every free minute he has.

"Don't worry, I'll only have eyes for you anyway." The statement makes him laugh and he relaxes a little. As we get out and walk a little way along the street, we are watched by a few people.

"Why are so many people staring at us?" When he look at me, I'm obviously confused.

"Not everyone here wears designer clothes that cost several thousand dollars. If you come here more often, they'll call you a princess." Giggling, I slap him on the arm and as we climb the stairs to his house, I look around curiously.

"So this is where you grew up." His shoulders shrug casually, but I see him trying to gauge my reaction.

"Yeah, where in the world could it be nicer?" I laugh at his sarcastic comment and we both smile at each other as we enter the house.

I hear him calling into the house, then a girl with red hair appears, carrying a baby.

"You must be Debbie, the little one is so adorable." When I hold out my hand, she just looks at Carl with her eyebrows still raised.

"What did you do to end up with her? Also my daughter's name is Franny and yes, I know condoms exist." Surprised, I don't know exactly how to answer, so I leave it to Carl.

"My tongue is magic, Debs. Too bad you won't find out yourself anytime soon, Derek has moved away. By the way, Franny seems hungry." I'm unsure of the dynamic between the two of them, as she turns away and walks away, I resist the urge to say goodbye.

"That was...nice." His hand pulling me towards the stairs distracts me.

"She's a real ray of sunshine, come on. The others aren't back yet, so you can be as loud as you want this time."

When we get upstairs, he leads me into his room and I look at the magazines, posters and little things scattered everywhere.

"Cleaning and you are definitely not friends, huh?" I laugh at my joke, but Carl has other plans than letting me inspect his room.

He puts his hands on my hips and pushes me against the closed door, my breath catches as his eyes find mine.

"Do you want to keep playing housemaid? Then put on a damn maid costume, otherwise keep your eyes on me." At his stern voice, I press my thighs together and, grinning, I drag my fingers across his chest once again.

"Would you like that? Me on the floor, my ass in the air, and no underwear? Oh wait, what a coincidence that I'm not wearing any now either." His eyebrows raise, I see his eyes darken with lust.

"Let's save this little fantasy for another time, right now I just want to see you on my cock." Smiling, I lean towards him and start kissing him. I loosen the belt I bought him and pull him closer to me by his waistband.

"I think I did well today. After all, I didn't complain about getting through the school day without underwear. Do I get my reward now?" Grinning, he takes off my top and looks at my lace bra.

"Everything you want." He drops to his knees in front of me and kisses his way along my thighs, lifts my skirt and presses a kiss to my folds. Slowly he moves his tongue higher and kisses my stomach, I lean my head against the door.

"Does that feel good?" I just nod, burying my hand in his hair as he puts his mouth on me again.

"Ahh- Carl, I want you now." His fingers stretch me, the wetness running down my legs, making me tremble.

"You got me, sweetheart. What do you want me to do?" His head lifts to look at me and I place my fingers around his chin, seeing the moisture on his lips.

"I've been prepared enough, I want your dick now. Let's see if it's as magical as your tongue." Grinning, he stands up and lifts me up, lays me on my back on his bed and lies down between my legs.

He places a few kisses on my legs, then stretches up on his elbows so he's hovering over me. Then he kisses my cheek and my lips, lets his tongue slide over them and lets me taste myself.

I run my fingers through his blonde hair and pull his body closer to me. When he pulls a condom out of his pocket, I hold my breath.

"You still want to do this?" His look calms all the worries I had. I nod, stroking my fingers over his heated cheek.

"I trust you." His next kiss is passionate, his hands gliding over my body, caressing every bit of exposed skin. I lift my back off the mattress and let him take off my bra. His head lowers to run his tongue over my navel. As he sucks on them, I moan softly.

One of his hands starts kneading my breasts and when I try to take off my skirt, he stops me.

"Leave it on, okay?" I kiss him in response.

His hand strokes my sides and my own hands rest on his shoulders as he presses the tip of his cock against my entrance.

"Ready, baby?" When I agree, he presses himself into me and for a moment I have to squint my eyes because it hurts.

Then I feel several gentle kisses on my cheek, my forehead and my lips. His attempts to distract me work and as I become more and more relaxed, he slides further into me.

Slowly he presses his hips against me, the stretch so great that I can feel him all the way into my stomach. He waits for a moment, whispering sweet things in my ears until they get dirty and I beg him to move.

My hands wrap around his shoulders as he thrusts into me for the first time, the air around us thickening as he grunts and a moan escapes me.

"You're doing so well, God, you feel so good." His hips move faster and faster, the pleasure spreads through my body and the wetter I feel, the easier he slides in and out of me.

"You are perfect, my perfect girl. Do you feel good?" His hands stroke my skin, gently pinching my nipples, playing with them and making me squirm beneath him.

As he grips my hips and pushes himself harder into me, my head starts to spin. My noises get louder.

"Carl- god, please go harder" And so he does, the room is filled with the sounds of our bodies and sweat forms on us.

"Baby, do you want to ride me? You have such pretty thighs." I nod and when he pulls out of me I can't think clearly, I just want him to fill me up again.

He leans back and as I stabilize myself on his shoulders, I sink back onto him. The feeling is even better that my eyes roll back. His hands grasp my hips, helping me move.

"That's right, baby. You're doing so good, riding my cock like the good girl you are." At his words, I tighten my grip on him and he curses as I move harder on top of him.

The faster I go, the more exhausting it becomes, but as I feel a knot forming in my stomach, I ride him so fast just to chase my pleasure.

Then suddenly as he hits my spot inside me over and over again, I go boneless on him and melt in his arms. My come drips all over him and as he continues to fuck me, reaching his own climax, I tremble in his grip.

"Just a few more thrusts, baby. Ah, keep holding on to me." Even though I have lost my strength, I move on him a few more times until he comes and I lay my head on his shoulder.

We're both breathing heavily, but everything feels so good, so warm and comfortable, that I don't want to move a single muscle anymore.

He carefully pulls out of me, I moan slightly at the loss. He gently lays me back on his pillow and gives me a kiss before throwing the condom away.

He pulls the blanket over us and puts his arm around me to pull me closer. I snuggle up to him and feel so safe that I quickly press my lips to his skin.

"That was wonderful." He also presses a kiss on my hair.

"That was incredible, you are the best. I can't wait to do it again." Our embrace becomes tighter. For a moment the room is silent.

When I whisper his name, he hums in response.

"I know it's cliche to say something like that after the first time. But I just feel it so much that it hurts to keep it to myself. I love you." As I lie on his chest I hear his heart stop for a moment and then it starts beating much faster.

"I- no one has ever said that to me before." When I raise my head and look at him, he doesn't look at me. Instead, his eyes are fouced on the ceiling.

"I just want you to know. I don't want to put any pressure on you to say it. I just thought you should hear it. You know, now that things are serious between us." Again he is silent and I start to worry, but then he looks at me.

"You are truly the most incredible person I have ever met. I consider myself very lucky." He smiles at me, then leans down and we kiss for a moment. It feels like heaven.

We lay there for a few minutes, just cuddling and telling each other how our day was. We laugh and as the sun slowly sets, I start to get dressed.

"I wish I could stay here with you. But you know what my parents are like." He leans back on his elbow, watching me get dressed and contact my parents to pick me up.

"Hmm, I think we would do it again. If you stayed here tonight, I mean." I smile at him, sit down on his bed for a moment and ruffle his hair.

"I wouldn't mind, darling." The nickname makes him blush and when he leans forward to kiss me, I playfully push him away.

"I have to go, are you coming down with me?" He nods, feigning annoyance, and as we walk out of his room, he puts his arm around my waist and pulls me towards him.

He steals his kiss there, but more than that he steals my heart.

We smile at each other and for this moment everything is just perfect. We go downstairs and just as we are back in the living room we hear a door open loudly.

A visibly drunk man stumbles in. I see Carl tense up next to me, staring at the stranger angrily. I quietly lean towards him to whisper my question.

"Who is that?" When he rolls his eyes, I get a bad feeling.

"That's my father, great isn't it?" The man in front of me is dirty, has unkempt hair and an unpleasant smile on his face.

"Should I ask my parents if you can stay overnight?" My gaze is more focused on the man than on Carl.

But he just shakes his head, and just as he is about to answer, the man sees us too.

"Oh, my son! It's so good to see you, not really, but I'll take your bed. Fiona has mine. Is that your little girlfriend? She looks expensive, very good catch. How much money did you rip her off? I hope it's worth it to go through all this drama." I frown in confusion, but when Carl freezes next to me, I become uncertain.

"What does he mean by that?" This time my gaze is directed solely at Carl.

"Nothing, he's drunk-" but before he can finish, the man does.

"How rude of me, I am Frank. The proud father of this child, at least one of my descendants has made something of himself and used his talent. He has my good genes, the good looks and I teach him the tricks. Like exploiting an innocent, very very rich girl for money. It doesn't bother you, I hope? You seem to have enough, but I hope my son returns the favor to you."

The words catch me so off guard that I can't move. I don't believe anything this man says until I see the guilty look on Carl's face.

"W-what? That's a lie, right? Tell me he's lying, Carl." As he runs his hands through his hair and tries to answer me, Frank speaks again.

"Oh, you haven't confessed to her yet? My fault, I should have waited. I didn't think you would humiliate this girl for so long. I told you this wouldn't end well." But Carl ignores him completely when he notices me moving away from him.

"Wait, I'm sorry. It wasn't like that-" But I interrupt him, already feeling tears gathering in my eyes.

"So what happened? You act like you don't want any money from me and-" Carl's look becomes frustrated.

"You offered me your money! You said if I matched it, everything would be fine for you." I'm almost speechless, is this all a nightmare?

"Are you serious? I offered it to you because you weren't asking for it. And now I find out it was your plan from the beginning? You just talked to me, just spent time with me to get my money? Who does that?" Frank's voice intervenes.

"I invented the strategy, my dear. It's turning out to be quite useful." But I don't pay attention to him, I just look at Carl.

"Please, I'm sorry. Yes, it was meant that way in the beginning, but it's different now. I-" My tears flow when he admits it and any feeling of happiness disappears. All that remains is betrayal and sadness.

"You what? What am I saying, you were probably happy that I only wanted you in return. I'm such an idiot. You didn't just take my money, you took my first time too!" As he comes towards me, I step back.

"Listen to me, I didnt force you to do all this for me. You wanted it." The more he talks the more desperate I feel and the greater my anger becomes.

"You idiot! I thought you liked me! I thought you finally noticed me too." My sobs get louder and my vision blurs. When he tries to grab my face, I slap him.

"My cue to go. I can see that you're sorting it out between yourselves just fine." Frank's footsteps fading away are nothing compared to the sound of my heart breaking.

"I like you, I really like you. At first it wasn't my intention to start a relationship with you, but then I got to know you and-" Every word that escapes him is only worse.

"Stop talking! You know what the worst thing is that I liked you for so long before you even talked to me. And I thought it was a miracle when you first spoke to me in the libary. I should have listened to the others, you only care about yourself!" I wipe the tears from my cheeks, wishing I could be anywhere but here.

Then before he can say anything, I turn around and run out of the house. But I hear him following me.

"Wait! Don't just walk away, I have to get this straight. Hey!" He catches me, turns me around and holds my tear-stained face in his hands.

"I'm an idiot, I know that. I'm sorry for hurting you. I- God, I love you. You hear me? I love you too. Please stay." But I just shake my head and try to free myself from his grip.

"How do I know if that isn't a lie too? You've betrayed me, I can't talk to you now." When my car pulls up, I get in without turning around. I don't look back, even though his loud curse can be heard throughout the whole neighborhood.

🔗🔗🔗🔗🔗

Your pov

I spend the next few days without saying much, but I cried almost the whole time.

I miss him incredibly, not a day has gone by in the last few months when I haven't seen him and now I've been alone for three days.

I wish he was here, but on the other hand I am so hurt and feel terrible. He is the reason for this.

I wish I had never found out. I wish he had never done it, never lied to me. Didn't use me for money, but worst of all, I don't know if he even likes me.

Today is the first day that I go back to school. Even though I put on make-up, choose a nice outfit and listen to my favorite songs to distract myself, I can only think of him.

His blonde hair, his beautiful eyes, the way his lips felt. How he felt inside me. Then I remember that he loves me and how he finally said it, something I have wanted to hear for so long.

But then I think about what he did and everything feels empty again.

As I enter the school, my friends come to meet me. They already know what happened, they all hug me and I feel a little better.

Until I see him.

And he sees me too. It takes all my effort to avert my gaze. To get my books out of my cupboard, but then I have to stop because he is not standing next to me offering to carry them.

I take it myself, close my door, but before I can go any further, he is standing in front of me. My heart stops. Oh, how his eyes shine.

"Do you need help?" His eyes focus on the books and I have to swallow several times before I can answer.

"No, I have to go to class now." But as I try to walk past him, he stops me.

"You don't answer my texts, you don't call me back. I'm not allowed into your house and you avoid me at school. What can I do? Please tell me what I need to do, so you forgive me." I laugh, but it is without humor.

"What can you do? Move."

I can see his shock, but he still doesn't step aside.

"Can't you hear me? I said-" but he walks toward me until I'm forced to lean my back against the lockers.

His eyes find mine.

"I can't sleep. And when I do, I dream of you. There's a - a hole in my heart that only you can fill. It hurts and I hate not being with you. It's even worse to be here, when you don't look at me the way you usually do. You don't smile at me, God, you don't look like you're in love with me anymore. It's hell."

Tears gather in my eyes, his words are so desperate, it hurts to see him like this.

"Maybe you should have thought about that before you took advantage of me. Before you slept with me." A tear runs down my cheek and I know my mascara is smudging.

"I know, I know. And I feel so bad, I'll do anything to make it right. Just tell me."

When I look into his eyes, my heart also hurts.

"Move, Carl. I can't see you now." This time he lets go of me and I go to class with tears in my eyes.

🔗🔗🔗🔗

Your pov

It's been four weeks since we last spoke, but it doesn't hurt any less to see him. Even if I don't let him talk to me, he doesn't give up.

He puts flowers in my locker, chocolate, and notes full of apologies and sweet promises.

Everything warms my heart, but it still feels like this money thing is unresolved between us. I know now that he likes me, very much in fact, as he makes it clear, but that doesn't change the real problem.

That he used me for my money.

As I leave school that day, I feel exhausted and, as I often do, I wish I had his arms around me.

Holding me tight, his lips kissing me, loving me.

As I wait for my father's car, I suddenly hear his familiar throat clearing. With my heart pounding, I turn around and see him smiling uncertainly at me.

"I know what I had to do and now I've done it. Here." He gives me an envelope and I take it uncertainly.

"Carl, your letters are flattering, but-" He quickly interrupts me.

"No, it's something else. Open it." The deja vu hits me unexpectedly and I slowly open the envelope, the content leaves me speechless.

"What is that supposed to be?" It's rhetorical, but I ask anyway.

"All the money I owe you. What you've kindly given me, I pay it back. Every cent. You can count." He looks so proud, I almost have to laugh.

"How- did you rob a bank?" He grins contentedly at my reaction.

"An old grandma." This time I laugh and he comes closer to me, slowly taking my hands.

"No, seriously. How did you do that?" He looks at me lovingly.

"Working in the kitchen every day after school, I found a part-time job with Fiona. The payment is bad, but it was worth it. I understand that money was the problem and well, that I wasn't honest to you." As I lower the envelope, we look at each other.

"Promise, no more secrets?"

He smiles and suddenly the world is a brighter place.

"Promise, but we continue one of our agreements." I raise my eyebrows questioningly, seeing him grin as he leans toward me, his breath brushing against my lips and he whispers:

"I'll still spend my breaks with you in the janitor's room."

The laughter that escapes me gets interrupted, when his lips meet mine.

[hamletshoeratio]

didnt she also say something nasty about the queen when one of her kids had just died

Yeah here's part 2 of this

The way she talked about the death of Queen Charlotte's granddaughter; Princess Charlotte, who was historically only twenty-one when she died in childbirth. The Lady Whistledown commentary in QC is just outright cruel, it's clear Queen Charlotte in the off-season (QC present day timeline being set in the Winter/Early spring break between season 2 & 3) becomes Penelope's biggest target in the aftermath of her fallout with Eloise. There's no other way to describe it.

Ngl the above is really disturbing to me. She's angry at Eloise, has lost access to info from the Bridgertons because of her falling out with Eloise, and she's angry at the Queen for getting angry at Penelope's own words as LW, and trying to discover LW as a result. And so she spends the off-season insulting and attacking a grieving Queen Charlotte. I mean that's one way for a flower to bloom I guess...

Theo, one of the only working class characters in the show, nearly lost his job because of lady whistledown and may have lost it in the aftermath of the season.

A lot of her general commentary as Lady Whistledown isn't clever or witty; it's just outright cruel.

The way she talks about the Bridgerton family, a family that trusts and cares for her, is horrible. Particularly, the way she wrote about Daphne in season 1.

Betraying Eloise's trust for two entire seasons because it didn't start with the Theo situation. She listened to Eloise's frustrations about Daphne and then used LW to attack and belittle Daphne. Speaking as a sibling, I will rant about my sisters until kingdom come to my friends but the minute a so-called friend starts publicly attacking my sister, it's over. I would not be in control of my actions. Like over the course of two seasons, she's attacked and nearly destroyed the reputations of Eloise's eldest sister, two of her brothers, her first love, and the entire family as a result. Judging by the Bridgertons were born to shine line in the trailer, I doubt Francesca will make it through the season unscathed.

She hasn't felt real remorse. Despite nearly causing Marina's death (as she tried to miscarry in the aftermath of LW revealing her pregnancy), she ends season 1 smirking about being LW. Hasn't written or contacted Marina to see how she has been since, got jealous Colin went to see her and still probably hasn't written or visited her. Not to mention her "I least did something. All you did is talk" speech at the end of season 2 to Eloise. A speech that wasn't even accurate as Eloise had been to meetings, listened to speeches and debates, debated with Theo, shared and read and discussed different political leaflets with Theo, Eloise had grown intellectually from the beginning to the end of the season. It's because of Penelope that that came to an end.

Outside of rescuing Daphne from her betrothel to Berbrooke in s1, what good has her work as LW actually done? It's ruined far more lives than it's helped, and intervened countless times when it didn't have authority to. Many secrets weren't Penelope's to tell.

I could honestly keep going but I genuinely don't know how she's supposed to get redeemed in eight episodes because the character we have at the minute in no way deserves a happy ending. LW didn't really matter in the books as it wasn't as active a plot point as it is in the show. By expanding the LW concept to give Penelope a more complex arc, they've unwittingly robbed her of what made people like her book counterpart and as a result created a villain that they have no intention of trying to redeem, because they don't believe she needs to be redeemed.

[she-posts-nerdy-stuff]

Hi,

Do you ever think on the first conversation Inej and Kaz had in Heleen's office? It feels like theres a lot there and I wondered if you have any thoughts on it. I come back a lot to when Inej asks Kaz if he convinced Per Haskell to buy out her indenture because "you like Suli girls" and Kaz answers "i don't know enough Suli girls to say"

that's a very interesting sort of snarky answer to me because he refutes the idea that he's the type to fetishize the Suli culture to the point of being "into" Suli women just because they are Suli. But also he doesn't just shut down the idea of him being into anyone. Which ... This is post Imogen debacle, he's resigned himself to not being "into" anyone at this point for several years. He doesn't care how people see him for it either. He could have been ruder or more just more direct about this, but he wasn't. And its like that with many of his early actions towards Inej. He's nicer than you'd think he'd be and its interesting becuase i don't get a sense that Kaz fell for Inej "at first sight", i think his love for her was gradual and snuck up on him (heh) so really everything he did at first and especially not demanding she gets a dregs tatto must have been from some basic sense of compassion, although he'd shank me for saying so.

Also, i always wondered how Kaz explained to Haskell why Inej didnt get a tattoo, then i re-read the books recently i realized omg i bet he totally probably just didn't?! Inej wasn't the type talk about it, she wears concealing clothes and is not very seen/social within the gang so my theory is that lazy ass Haskell didnt ask and assumed she got a tatto and kaz just let the assumption happen. Do you think that's believable?

Hi, thanks so much for your question - and so sorry it’s taken me an eternity to reply!

When I tell you that I think about this meeting once a week… well I’m hoping that you think “woah so cool she knows so much and thinks so in depth about these characters literary analysis is awesome” and not “Jesus Christ she’s insane”. But genuinely, the Kanej meeting is something I think about a lot and I think holds an awful lot of meaning.

The “you like Suli girls” “I don’t know enough Suli girls to say” to me is such a wonderful moment because, as you quite rightly said, it immediately refutes Kaz’s endorsement of the hyper-sexualisation of Suli culture that we see so prevalently in Kerch / Ketterdam (I’ve gone into this at length before but in a whistle stop tour think about the way the Menagerie customers talk about Inej and place so much emphasis on her skin colour, her bedroom at the Menagerie being a “farcical” version of a Suli caravan, the way “the Menagerie always stocked a Suli girl”, the Rare Spices billboard, etc). And this is so important for so many reasons, but in particular because the second Heleen exits the room and she’s alone with Kaz, Inej immediately tenses at the assumption that he is going to rape or assault her- “braced herself for what would come next, fingers twisting in her silks”. And what happens instead? He asks her for her name. Her name, that has been ignored and erased for an entire year as yet another roll of dehumanisation piled against her. Even though the pair discuss and make a clear understanding of the fact that this isn’t some kind of rescue mission and Inej’s world isn’t going to suddenly fix itself, this moment makes an instant connection for Inej between Kaz Brekker and safety. Because somehow, despite everything that’s happening, this moment in Tante Heleen’s office is the safest Inej has felt for an entire year. It’s also interesting that you mentioned he doesn’t shut down the idea of not being interested in anyone and I definitely agree with that, personally I don’t believe that Kaz is asexual although I know some people headcanon him that way it’s just not something that works for me and my perception of his character, and that’s because of situations like his attraction to Imogen and several situations he’s in with Inej. His exact words when considering being with Imogen are “he knew the things he was supposed to want. He did want those things”, which to me very clearly shows that he does experience sexual attraction and sexual desire, and the limiting factor is his ptsd and touch aversion rather than his sexuality/orientation. I agree that Kaz and Inej didn’t experience a love at first sight kind of moment, but I do think that this meeting really solidified their relationship to a level of immediate understanding between them, in essence an acknowledgment of them being “twin soldiers, marching on, pretending they were fine”. They are both able to see the other, clock that they understand to some extent, and respect each other.

Kaz is quite abrasive in this scene, but what always gets me is how confrontational Inej is able to be - “And what happens when you take their money, and you become a rich man?”. (The quote is something to that effect, sorry I don’t have my book with me right now). I think that a big aspect of her being able to summon the confidence to put herself against him so immediately is that she genuinely feels this level of safety with him, because this far he represents the opposite of everything that had tormented her. Or at the very least the polar end of a spectrum that she has been tormented by another part of. And controversially to the image of everything Inej has experienced in the Barrel so far, Kaz is amused by and enjoys her standing up to him, in fact he almost seems endeared by it saying “Then you can steal all my secrets too”.

And ohh the tattoo, or lack thereof, makes me so happy! It doesn’t require much reading between the lines to understand the relevance of Kaz not forcing Inej to take the Dregs tattoo on, she even says herself that he refused to be the one who marked her again, but I love the idea that he didn’t actually tell anyone she’s not got it!! I hadn’t considered this before but it makes perfect sense with everything we know about Inej’s relationship with the Dregs - Nina doesn’t know she lacks the tattoo, and Inej comments on the fact that the others can’t see her scars from having the Menagerie feather removed but that “they all knew it was there”, suggesting she keeps her forearms covered most of the time, and the emotional disconnect she feels from the rest of the Dregs is always discussed at an intellectual level and in the way she spends most of her time with Kaz or alone rather than with them rather than any dislike/distrust/etc of her because she didn’t take on the tattoo. I absolutely love this theory because it takes away any feeling of guilt around lacking the tattoo and also makes it a far more personal thing to be shared only between Kaz and herself.

Thank you so much, I’m so sorry it took me so long to reply, but I hope this made sense and that you enjoyed reading it! <3

[traceofexistence]

I was looking again, at the quotes of that tweet with the views of thai GL this year, and the pressed idiots who can't stomach that blank got no1

so one of them said that "blank glorifies grooming" and we really need to talk about the use of words again

let's make something clear first: if you haven't watched the series, then shut the fuck up, because you don't know what you are talking about. you just parrot what you heard from others who haven't watched.

grooming is a serious accusation and a real life thing that happens and harms mostly kids, teens, and to lesser extent very young adults

be mindful when you use words that affect real life people. using the word in a way that stretches the meaning so far that it ends up meaning nothing, it harms the people who went through that situation. such words need to maintain their specific and strong meaning.

now on to the blank the series

the TV show made a conscious decision to change some stuff from the book. they fixed stuff they didnt break them.

Khun Nueng, the 36 year old woman, who is not emotionally mature when it comes to romance, due to the fact that she never had a relationship before(only one night stands) she also grew up as a royalty, who was restricted from showing emotions, which is typical for her societal status. all through the show other character mention how "she never cared about anyone before"

Khun Nueng doesn't pursue the younger woman, it's the other way around. for the entirety of s1, which spams for almost a year. she's been trying to keep the younger woman at arms length. we can see that she's falling for her, but she never initiates anything, in fact it is a whole painful plot line with the younger one always complaining that Khun Nueng never fights for them, that she's the one who always trying on her own.

another factor, is that Khun Nueng, an older, richer, higher in the societal scale (she's a literal royalty), more experienced in life, already gone through higher education, and so many more factors that would put the younger one in a disadvantage, Khun Nueng never uses any of those factors against Anueng.

she has only used that power of hers for the benefit of Anueng, for example tutoring her so she could get in the best university. another example is how much she would use her superiority against Chet's homophobia. Chet is scared shitless of Khun Nueng, he is not angry that she left him at the altar, because he knows he can only benefit from being with her again. he doesn't dare to displease Khun Nueng, and she knows that and uses it, for Anueng's benefit.

when he interrogates poor Yui, Khun Nueng despite working against her own happiness, she approves of Anueng and Yui being a couple, and tells Chet that, and that there is nothing wrong with two girls dating, and that he should accept his daughter.

When eventually the cat is out of the bag, and hell breaks loose, Khun Nueng goes against, again her own heart, because she believes Anueng needs her family, so she puts herself second (of course that is false, and she realizes that, and she finally stands her ground and fights for them) but she never EVER trying to do anything that would benefit her over Anueng.

Khun Nueng genuinely cares about Anueng's well being

another example of that is, when she tells the mom that the grandma, beats Anueng with a stick

she's even wiling to vilify her own self in the eyes of Anueng, so her girl can have a calm family life.

I dont know how anyone in their right minds can call that grooming, but here we are. a groomer would try to isolate the younger person from those close to them (in this case Anueng's family) but Khun Nueng not only doesn't do that, she does the opposite, in times going against Anueng's will to make time for her parents.

as for Anueng, a 20 soon to turn 21 year old, who falls head over heels for this older woman, who she admires very much and aspires to live her life freely like her. she's someone who have lived a sheltered life has no friends, and in Khun Nueng she finds not only the love of her life, but a person who cares about her.

she's the one putting a label on their relationship since day one, she's the one pushing the boundaries every time, she's the one initiating everything.

her emotional intelligence is so high that she understands Khun Nueng in a deeper level than anyone has done before.

I'm really tired of people judging media without consuming them.

that is even worst than media illiteracy

because at least with media illiteracy, you watched the damn thing, you are just too up your ass to get what it tries to say

[daphnebowen]

percy jackson episode five thoughts

I skipped a couple episodes where I wrote down my thoughts, but I'm about to rewatch and write don't worry! warning: lots of screaming, fangirling, heart attacks, and nonsense below :))

also these are all just copied straight from the notebook I use when I'm writing down my thoughts and I barely proofread them :)

Annabeths trust in Percy being alive is literally just like her belief that Luke is alive later on and even though it's kinda sorta different (or at least people are gonna treat it that way) I'm all here for it

WHY WERE THE FATES SO CREEPY HELLO

AAAAAHHHH THE PERCABETH HUGGGG I IGNORED SO MANY SPOILERS AND IM SO GLAD 2 minutes in and I'm already fangirling so hard haha

is Grover blushing at them??

"surprise" omg Walker 😭🥹

the droplet of water clinging to walkers chin is so distracting

"I'm the last person to realize this aren't I?" It's okay Percy

his eyes are SO FREAKING BLUE it's giving zac efron from hsm2

"it doesn't have to be a thing, yk. That you hugged me." OHKAY HES NOT ENTIRE CLULESS THIS IS FAN SERVICE RIGHT HERE WE KNOW THAT IT MOST ABSOLUTELY WILL BE A THING LMAO and annabeths "oh boy" and Grover's clear exasperation HAHAH

where the heck did the motorcycle go lol we know it's ares but like it doesn't take that long to drive

"we're all gonna die... eventually" wise words Percy wise words

ugh the fact that it's Luke's string 💔

Ares ‼️‼️‼️

Ok but why is ares literally EXACTLY how I thought he would be?!?!

"that's my cousin? what kind of family is this?" A dysfunctional one for sure, sorry Percy you're in for a rough ride

ares starting a fight on twitter is ABSOLUTELY CRAZY and yet so in character lmao

"I'm gonna kill him" same Percy SAME I will gladly help you - although all things considered I am glad they decided to keep delinquent percy in the show

they keep bringing up the "push someone down a flight of stairs" thing! There's no way this is just a coincidence anymore, what with chalice of the gods and earlier on with Annabeth and like... they're obviously doing it on purpose. is that gonna be the shows new thing?? trusting someone enough so that if they can push you down the stairs they're the one? idk man, love the metaphor tho

PLS LET THERE BE THE ZOO TRUCK SCENE OH MY PLS

leah's eyebrow quirk is 💋

WATERLAND IS PERFECT OMG

walker portrayed Percy's anxiety and nervousness and scaredness (is that a word?) perfectly

Can't tell if Grover is actually a history buff or playing Ares so he will talk but that scene was actually cool, I like the change they made to have Grover stay behind (this was what I wrote originally, but now after seeing peoples interpretations and opinions and things I know he was playing ares and I think it's BRILLIANT how smartly he played the god of war. Good for you buddy!)

"I didn't say anything" "I can feel you thinking it" OHKAY THEN

thrill ride of love = flawless. No words. I am speechless.

"I hate kids" relatable

ARES IS ACTUALLY BEING SMART AND MAKING SENSE FOR ONCE not to mention he's so funny and so relatable!

AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH SEAWEED BRAIN ALERT 🚨 SEAWEED BRAIN ALERT 🚨 SHE CALLED HIM SEAWEED BRAIN AND I LOVED IT never mind the actual SCREAM i let out lmao

is Annabeth about to cry?!?!

yeah she's definitely about to cry

why am I so scared. This cannot be happening. What?? What??? he's the main character. main characters don't die. well except for Magnus chase BUT THOSE ARE DIFFERENT GODS AND DIFFERENT RULES NO WALKER

why am I actually so scared about this chair thing omg

(I would just like to say that I was so speechless and in shock throughout the whole chair thing, so I didn't write down a single quote but I loved them all I just was in too much shock to pause the show lol)

um.

WHAT. JUST. HAPPENED.

WHY IS MY BABY GOLD

WHY IS MY CHILD GOLDDDD

I AM SO CONFUSED RIGHT NOW THIS DEFINITELY DIDNT HAPPEN IN THE BOOKS MY BRAIN IS TOO SLOW FOR THIS 😭😭😭

oh my gosh ITS HEPHEASTUS

dude the way that door suddenly opened scared the crap out of me

leah is absolutely shining as Annabeth, her monologue was so profound and heartfelt, love that addition 💗

THAT CLIFFHANGER GOES CRAZYYYY

okay of course those of us who read the books know who really stole the lightning bolt and stuff but the clueless fools just watching the show are gonna be like OMG WHO WHO and even if they piece it together technically they'll only be half right. and their confusion and confidence in what they think they know is going to be SO entertaining in the coming weeks hehehehe and even throughout the whole series if we continue to get green lights for the series

but yes that episode was utter perfection! Now for the teaser...

WHO DID PERCY JUST TACKLE EXCUSE ME

duuuuude. The lotus casino is MASSIVE and actually super pretty I cannot wait for the episode tomorrow!

WHY IS PERCY DRIVING OMG THIS IS NOT LEGAL although tell me why he is literally better at driving than I am HAHAHAHAHAH

ugh and that is it! Those are all my random thoughts from the episode! thanks for reading :))

[azsazz]

MM Feedback Contd.

Anon Feedback: for the midnight muse feedback: what was missing: for me most of the plot was missing, besides their bickering phase and then them getting together i think we didn't really get much else. also a backstory for the reader character but i understand why we didnt get it here since it's a x reader fic

Yes, backstories will be flushed out for sure, a bit difficult to do like you said because x reader, but i will for sure work on this!

what you didn't like: honestly most of the relationships between them, the talk between the bat boys and az was good but it felt like they just apologized and moved on and that was it. but feyre was a terrible friend with the whole rhys situation and in her talk with reader she basically admitted she was prioritizing rhys over her and reader was just like "it's fine, we're best friends" it made me not like feyre for the rest of the story. cass going to befriend the girls immediately also feels a little weird, like i get the vibes that he didn't really think about it but i think if i was azriel i would be sad about it, of all the people in the world my bestfriend went to befriend the people i don't like? that's low. and then their relationship because it felt like it dragged on where they hated each other to then have them get together after one nice talk and then the story ends after a couple of chapters. there was some tension between them but just sexual so when they got together that's the only thing i felt. the little fight they had was unnecessary, it literally served no purpose and made no sense.

Working on friendship relationships, noted! Will also work on Cass becoming a more gradual friend instead of jumping in headfirst with them behind az's back, good feedback for sure. I will also work on reader x feyre's relationship because they're supposed to be better friends than that, so good thing to point out, thank you!

what you adored: i like the characters. reader is cool but if it gets turned into a book like i said i wish we got more story for her. i like az and even when he was being an asshole it's clear it's mostly because he has a lot on his mind and probably needs a therapist. cassian is funny sometimes but he gives too much frat boy at other times and it's a bit icky because it gives me war flashbacks, i also don't love the himbo characters usually so i think it's really personal preference. feyre was a terrible friend but other than that she was just there i guess. rhys was also giving me the ick too much in the beginning but then towards the end it got better, i like how he went and talked to reader about feyre (almost better than feyre herself did) and he was really good with azriel especially during their talk. lucien ended up not really serving much of a purpose in my opinion but his character is cool

there were def some times where i was writing cass where i was like this is probably way too much, so i'll probably rework some of his liners and such. i didn't really have a backstory for feyre x rhys but i think i do now so that will help give the story and their actions some meat/will be reworking thier characters a bit so that makes more sense as well. yeah i need to figure out what i'm doing with lu. i was trying to allude that at the coffeehouse he was there to show off reader to make one of the barista's jealous, so they were kind of using each other a little bit, reader didn't know her feelings for az at the time so she wasn't hanging out with him to make az jealous but luc kept suggesting coffee because his love interest works there.

what I should remove completely: the fight after they got together and i think how they end up being friends. i don't know cassian just going up to them and suddenly they were all besties was a little weird to me also i get what you were doing with the elevator scene because at that point they only talked if they were locked together but it's just so cliché and it's another one to add to the others like the talk was nice but it being in the elevator was predictable

I did get a lot of feedback about the fight, so this has been added to my feedback notes a lot. i mean, i don't mind the elevator cliche, or a cliche at all, as long as the entire book didn't feel like one...i'll consider it for sure during the rewrite and see how i feel about it, so thank you for the feedback on that!

things that felt off or you felt were unresolved: their relationship because like i said we got them hating each other and then they got together and it just ended. and i think at that point they really didn't know anything about each other so there was even more of a whiplash when they actually start dating immediately because you only see sexual tension before that and then suddenly they're super nice to each other and act like they always liked each other. i think people go into it already liking azriel and knowing they'll end up together so they're just waiting on it and never take it as not being a possibility because its azriel and they're reading fanfics about him because they already like him but if it's a nameless character you need to make people like the characters and like them together and feel the tension between them and like they'd be good together which i dont really get from this fic. most of the plot felt unresolved too because the dad thing never really went anywhere which i guess was the plot besides the romance, also lucien was there and then just wasn't (it also didn't really feel like he liked her much)

will definitely be working on their chemistry and them getting to know each other/building a relationship. i agree with what you're saying that they just got together and didn't know anything about each other so i'll edit that too. az's dad will have more presence in the rewrite as well, as i was writing i kept thinking of ideas (as we can tell) so that's why they weren't predated in the story etc, so i will def fill those holes in as well!

also this might just be my opinion but the idea for her tattoo is so bad im sorry, i had to stop when i read it and it's her first tattoo as well. just the thought of it looks ugly to me but even the meaning is off for me... maybe if you want to keep the hand idea let him get it because he's already so heavily tattooed that the big two detailed hands piece might kind of blend in but for her first tattoo let him get her something else, either something meaningless and pretty (i mean she's in art school i know she has to have better ideas) or something important for her but not necessarily a relationship tattoo not even a year into their relationship.

i'm not going to lie, i struggled so hard with what to give her a tattoo of and i think that's also why i didn't actually add it into the story is because i had no idea what to do. i do agree that she shouldn't have gotten that when they've only been together for not that long, and it is cringey but i felt like it made sense at the time. i will work on her tattoo ideas tho

also (and i might be talking out of my ass) but if his injury only happened a year ago i'm not sure he'd be even drawing already even if shaky, you'd have to do some research there but i think it wouldn't be bad if you pushed it back a little further in the past

this is also a fair point, i'm also not sure, but if i ever go to publish it will be a different injury so i will for sure do some research about that when i go to describe it! and yeah, i can totally move it a bit further into the past like you said :)

Thank you for the feedback this is a lot to work with here, so thank you for reading and taking the time to send all of this back to me!! 💙

[tadpolesonalgae]

ive seen the argument that rhys killed the winter court children thrown around so much but thank you for saying that bc i was starting to think i read it wrong. kallias only agrees to help the night court when it's made clear that rhys didnt kill the children and that amarantha had another mind reader. and they even become allies because kallias and viviane are at some celebration at the housw of wind later in the books right? if it had been rhys none of that would happen.

there are a lot of reasons you can not like rhysand he was always meant to be a morally grey character (imo sjm made him too nice actually) but im always confused when people keep using this reason because it might be the only one he was proven innocent

i loved the story dont get me wrong but reader in that is closer to hybern than to rhysand like the whole thing with the ic is that they all did terrible things but with a reason and she's just a bitch for a lack of a better word

i also felt both az and rhys were justified in how they treated her, i mean it was tough to read but she went way too far in how she was talking about elain, calling her all type of misogynistic names just because azriel and her are together so ofc azriel lost it on her (and not even that badly like he meant everything he said and none of those were lies) and then ofc the last straw for rhys was her threatening to dig up the archeron dad, that's a disgusting thing to do and rhys doesnt play about feyre. also if she has had this personality for centuries i can only imagine the list of shit the ic has against her

id love to read more of this story but i think it's pretty clear she's a villain, not even morally grey like the ic. i do love villain stories though so im excited lol

I mean, with the Winter Court situation, I’m pretty sure that’s what happened? 🫣 I don’t have the books on me at the moment so I can’t check but I agree it would be weird if Kalias and Viviane came over for the solstice with the death of a dozen children between them, so I’m inclined to believe Rhys wasn’t the one who committed that particular crime for Amarantha 🫠😭

And with Rhys being morally grey, I feel like it gets a little confusing because we don’t really get to see what he’s like as a character without Feyre? I feel like he probably took a bit of a (positive) turn now that he has his mate if that makes sense? Also the fact he isn’t under the pressure of maintaining a mask so thoroughly has probably contributed to who he’s become? I’d really like to get a scene though where the morally grey part bleeds through, perhaps if someone’s threatened in a future book? 👀

Either way, he’s a fictional character (to many’s upset 😔) so I suppose his personal ethics aren’t a particular point of contention when held against some problems occurring in our world 😕

‘i loved the story dont get me wrong but reader in that is closer to hybern than to rhysand’

You do not have to worry about a thing, she is fully intended to be easily and actively dislikable though I don’t think it’s an issue if some people take her side since this is a work of fiction 🧡💛

However, I am really interested in seeing what sides people take when it comes to what she does and her motivations, as well as what she holds dear and who she’s loyal to when it comes down to it! I’ll be curious if anyone will feel her actions might be more easily justifiable or at the very least understandable once more of her past is dug up? Whether people feel a bad deed is always a bad deed irrespective of circumstance, or whether the context and environment surrounding an action should be taken into consideration before passing judgement :)

‘calling her all type of misogynistic names just because azriel and her are together so ofc azriel lost it on her’

To be perfectly honest with you, I really enjoyed getting to write the parts because of how inappropriate they were given the situation 🤦😭 Her trying to convince Az to be with her and then insulting the person he claims to be in love with 🫣

‘and then ofc the last straw for rhys was her threatening to dig up the archeron dad, that's a disgusting thing to do and rhys doesnt play about feyre.’

I mean, not only is she a prominent figure in society, but she also has some pretty intense power readily disposable, and she doesn’t really act like she’s responsible enough to handle it (but we’ll inevitably examine those parts, too, because it would be weird if she just came into all that power without any sort of accountability or understanding of death and life, right? 👀)

‘id love to read more of this story but i think it's pretty clear she's a villain, not even morally grey like the ic. i do love villain stories though so im excited lol’

Honestly I’m still figuring out what’s going to happen in the end? She’s going to get with Az, but I’m indecisive on whether it’ll be a clean ending or not? I feel like if it is going to be like that, there’s a line that she won’t be able to cross, whereas it might be quite interesting to see how people try to reconcile her actions while still keeping in line with their own morals?

Also witnessing through her actions what sort of person she’s become and what situations have led up to that (and whether there are other people partially responsible for the things that have happened)

Either way, I think it’ll be exciting to figure these things out! There’s still so much of the story yet to be decided on, so it’s going to take some time for a next part to come together! And thank you so much for writing in!! I absolutely adore getting to read thoughts like this, it makes me so happy to know you’re invested to this level 🧡💛

[im-out-of-it]

it amazes me how much of CC’s fans will actually defend her, her lazy and shit writing, and the stuff that she’s done. so you like racist, homophobic writers you say? just say that then lmao

I’m not going to go in deep but I’m 100000000% sure she’s probably racist and a homophobe. I don’t care if you thought media wouldn’t accept gay relationships. YOU DID NOT HAVE TO WRITE THEM THE WAY YOU DID. Alec didn’t need to be biphobic. IT WAS NOT FUCKING NECESSARY. and I find it funny how in eldest curses: Magnus and Alec are completely different people. see what happens when authors who might actually give a shit write good arcs??? it was a money grab for CC. she doesn’t care about Alec, magnus, or any of her lgbtq+ characters. I don’t care if you think adding incest makes it “spicy”. INCEST IS NOT ROMANCE.

she’s a shit writer, has no originality when it comes to creating storylines and characters. I’ll give CC one thing. she does start to have good characters but she does absolutely nothing with them. CC could’ve done more with Magnus, Jem, Alastair, Thomas, Matthew, alec, Izzy, Ari, Gabriel, Gideon, and I could go on BUT SHE DIDNT. I can name hundreds (probably) of fan fic writers who would write the shadowhunter series better than CC ever could. I mean, the show literally proved they could do a better job lmao

she chose to focus on her main white “angelic” characters and let them do anything without holding accountability. and I get that it’s just a fucking book but people out there actually think like this. what she writes, her fans defend. like I think some of her fans think she’s a god who can’t do any wrong

staying in my anti tags make me feel safe because it’s astounding to me that people are actually okay with the incest, the abuse, the biphobia, how she writes her POC characters and storylines, how none of these POC characters can ever be their full race, and gives them the shittiest storylines, like they’re all a okay with that?????

and I get it’s just a fucking story but it means something if she continues to do this over and over again and it’s very clear that this is how she feels. look at how CC talks to her fans. I wasn’t there for the Harry Potter fandom shit but she was a fucking menace to people. she’s 50+ and writing about teens and a bunch of sexual shit. like the way she sexualized Cordelia??????

I’m also not saying that everything has to be perfect and make sense in “fantasy” world but even her worldbuilding doesn’t make any sense??? I’m kind of tired of seeing the same white guy who is an abusive asshole who seems to be loved by everyone and pays no repercussions. it’s very old lmao

show could be cringe but at least they tried to stay away from this as much as they could 😌 and when I say I love the show, I love the Malec aspect and some of Izzy’s stuff. I’m only here show malec 👏🏼

[night-market-if]

unrelated to my "HOLY SHIT" ask from the day before (i'll get back to that lol), i do wanna talk a lil about Hazel if you choose to take her with you to see Caliban because it gave me pause. And i didnt know if anyone else had brought it up so it's a lil late but

Spoilers (for if people didn't do it i suppose): Idk, i actually was very surprised that Hazel had such a strong reaction to it. Only because whether you condemn Caliban or not, Hazel is willing to comfort you either way. ...As long as she wasn't there.

It's very fair that Hazel did not want to go, and that it was unfair to push her boundary when she's uncomfortable. But i actually found it frustrating and hypocritical that Hazel did not express any issue with it as long as she didn't have to see it with her own eyes.

I don't think that's a bad thing to be clear! I find that makes Hazel a very well rounded character. Often, it's very easy to excuse or look the other way from the questionable and morally dubious choices our loved ones make, so long as we don't have to witness it. It's very flawed, and human.

But, to me personally, the narrative seems to be saying that MC is very much in the wrong for pushing Hazel when she didn't need to be, and that they very much want to gain her forgiveness. I...did not feel the same lol.

It felt frustrating because, MC thus far has had to make very scary and difficult choices to save a world whose people are indifferent or ignorant to it dying. All the hard choices that were placed on their shoulders alone. And Hazel can get angry and feel hurt and betrayed that MC would push her beyond her comfort, because she has that option. MC does not.

But with everything going on, there wasn't a chance to discuss the situation, or even the status of the relationship (because Hazel has distanced herself from MC). So i was wondering if this would be something explored in Book 2.

Hazel is one of the sweetest, kindest characters in the story, so it makes pushback against her choices difficult because i dont want to be callous to her. but then we've seen what she's capable of, and she's not someone to be trifled with, she is not above making morally questionable choices after all. Because is sacrificing the spirits of the alley any different from sacrificing Caliban?

I hope this didn't come off as rude, I just wanted to hear your thoughts on this.

I have been WAITING for someone to call me on this. :) I think a lot of people just didn't take that route so I don't have a lot of readers on it.

So, yes, you are correct that it isn't so much the action itself that makes Hazel upset, but that her boundary got pushed and she is a part of it. And yes, it has not been able to really be addressed between MC and Hazel because there is just so much stuff going on that their relationship kind of got put on the back burner (because it is supposed to be a relationship thing. I think a code got messed for some people). Now, that being said, chapter 12, you do start to address it and that is one of the things that the MC can call her out on. MC can express sorrow for maybe pushing their boundary, but for Hazel to constantly be in support of MC's boundary being pushed and expect no anger in return, is a hard thing to maybe stomach.

I am hoping to have it one of two ways for that conversation.

You understand it. You are apologetic. Hazel responds.

You understand it in theory, but you are also hurt and frustrated by her reaction, just as she is with yours. Hazel responds.

I'm not sure how Hazel's response to either of those is going to be yet because I haven't written it.

But, the main idea of what I have there, while it is going to be expanded on and cleaned up in the final edit, I do think is fundamentally going to stay the same. Hazel spent most of her life with her boundaries being crossed in horrendous ways. She also spent a long time turning a blind eye to what the people she loved did that were not so great. This moment, is far more about past issues than the MC themselves. But, Hazel's anger comes off I think differently than other RO's and she almost gives no room to talk. She hides. She has been doing so for a long time by not leaving that shop too often.

It is a character flaw for sure and one that will be focused on in Book 2. Don't worry, that is not going to be dropped and I think if the scene is not concluded in this book, it will be one of the first that is dealt with come the beginning of Book 2.

Thank you so much for this question. I love these in depth character explorations and going back and forth on them.

🪷✨🪷✨ If you want to support me 🪷 ✨🪷✨ Demo 🌿 Patreon 🌿 Ko-fi 🌿Discord

[creacherkeeper]

for sleepover saturday (time isn’t real) 4, 5, 9, and for florence 22, 25, and 30 🥰🥰

time isnt real!!! its nearly saturday again so lets just pretend this is sleepover saturday!!!

4. What's your favorite part of DMing?

i find it all so incredibly enjoyable but i think the best part is making things that are so Targeted for pcs / players and then they go crazy over it <333 like wow i get to be telling stories that are specifically for my friends!!!! and like yalls level of investment has been sooooo rewarding it makes me more emo & feel more loved than i can say <333 ive been a creative all my life but nothing has felt as good to make as lost township

5. Do you have a favorite NPC? Or type of NPC?

evil question ,,,, and like genuinely i really enjoy most of the npcs. like i find something to like or be interested in with all of them or else why would i hand them off to yall. ive definitely spent the most time with lizzie just bc of player engagement (yall know who you are)(she did not even have a character sheet in arc 1) but i think its unfortunately obvious my favorite archetype is dyke paladin with religious trauma and many things wrong with her. and i wont apologize for that.

9. What's your favorite thing your players do?

interact with the world and the plot in ways that are less about moving the plot forward and more about really inhabiting the characters. like arc 1 was very much a contained murder mystery and i think yall still did a great job with yalls characters but were very focused on Solving The Plot and i feel like in arc 2 yall have really stretched your wings and let your characters loose in a way thats just so so fun. has it taken forever to get to plot reveals Yes but its so worth it when yalls little guys are just being insane on screen for hours at a time

for florence:

22. How do they feel about the rest of the party?

ough,,,

cass: so intimidated. but also curious? quiet middle aged woman with some sort of strange foreign magic florence doesnt recognize and i think florence Wants to talk to her but will not approach first. shes clearly going through something but has mostly been keeping to herself and florence is not gonna be the one to break that

divine: she wants to be in divines good graces so bad,,, shes a wittle scared of divine but in the like. outcast girl vs popular cheerleader type of way and she definitely thinks of divine as the leader of the group. as wolf vs deer shes trying really hard not to scare divine but is maybe showing her belly a little too much. she thinks that if divine doesnt like her the rest of the party will follow suit. just feels kind of dumb and tongue tied around her

onion: shes so fuckin scared to talk to onion now. she already just really didnt know what the vibe was and then found out onion was fey and was like cool fairies are real i guess and then onion went into the First flashback and she snapped him out of it and onion immediately changed the subject to talk to her about lizzie and let her know lizzie is okay which she appreciated but is feeling very mixed up about, especially rolling so high on onion to get ,,,, A Vibe with onionlizzie. AND THEN THE SECOND FLASHBACK HAPPENED BECAUSE SHE WAS TRYING TO BE NICE TO HIM and now onion seems Unhappy and is Booking It and florence is like okay !! i fucked up !! dunno what to do now !! so shes probably just not gonna try to talk to them again unless they approach her first and she has a very clear direction for how the conversation should go. she feels sooooo bad but is also. Worried. not a good thing to get triggered by babyboy!!

tenny: she has no fucking idea how to feel about tenny. she knows tenny isnt human and tenny seems to have some sort of connection to animals / monsters and she knows tenny was being held captive in the blasting company so theres clearly Something going on there. but tenny is really keeping to her little squad and i think again its like. florence will talk to her if tenny approaches her first but shes not going to make first contact because her role in this group feels so tenuous already

will: shes autism imprinted on him. i think will is the only one in the group she actually just feels comfortable around and shes wondering why he's so different from oliver. she had definitely heard of him before while in silvermoon and then actually meets him and hes just very kind and caring and reassuring and shes definitely going to stick as close by him as she can. shes nervous or unsure or intimidated by everyone else there but will tried to calm and reassure her after she triggered onion and seems to be the person trying to take care of everyone on the trip. dog bonded to that sad old man. shes also hoping that if shes good with will maybe oliver will be less scary at her

25. Do they believe in love?

fucked up question. i think she thinks that love is duty & work & effort & loyalty and that its not meant to be easy or always fair but you just stick it out anyway and put more elbow grease in until it works. i think shes very used to being the one putting more of the work into relationships and does not necessarily see that pattern or that its a problem. shes dated and shes had flings but shes never had romantic love and she does not think its in the cards for her. she has her sisters back and she thinks she just needs to be grateful for that and not ask for more

30. What are their thoughts on justice?

interesting ... i think florence thinks justice is like. a nice ideal to keep in your head when youre making decisions but ultimately not a force thats like. Real. in the world. shes seen too many bad people be celebrated and too many innocent people suffer to think that justice is something that actually has any power in the world. the wolf pack is much more about Balance than any sort of actual goodness or fairness so even her temple never really purported itself as having justice as an ideal. the closest to that in wolfsden is sidewinder and florence has seen firsthand that his domain is not really enforced in any way

[thealmightyemprex]

Marvel Month :Hulk Gray

In this series Bruce Banner is talking to Doc Samson about the buried early days of the Hulk back when he was Grey not green,primarily focusing on Hulks relationship Betty Ross and her father Thunderbolt Ross

So the collaborations of Jeph Loeb and the late Tim Sale have become classics.Their probabbly best known for Batman the Long Halloween and Superman For All Seasons for DC ,but for a Marvel they did a thematic series :The Color books.Consisting of Daredevil Yellow,Spider-Man Blue,Hulk Grey and Captain America White ,each series takes a look at the early days of a Marvel superhero ,reminicing on the past as they remember a fallen loved one .IBefore this I have only read Daredevil Yellow which is pretty darn good ,but have heard good things bout both this and Spider-Man Blue (And Captain America White was SUPER delayed )

So I am so mixed on this book,cause when its great its great .....But I think,frankly, it made points that didnt feel were clear

I'll start with what I like

1.I like that there are no supervillains ,this is a character study and the villain is Thunderbolt Ross

2.This is less a superhero story and more a classic monster tale,which is fitting,as the initial idea for Hulk was based on the 1931 Frankenstein (Personal favorite of mine ) and even throw in a refrence to that film

3.Banner is an unreliable narrator ,we dont know how much of this is true and how much is his biases shaping the story .I dunno its an element I liked

4.Theres a lot of solid moments like Hulk in a cave with Betty (A scene later adapted into 2008's Incredible Hulk ), and a scene where Hulk pets but accidently kills a rabbit,I just really dug those scenes

5.There is a badass fight with Iron Man (Bulky gold suited Iron Man) and I just found that neat

6.Tim Sales artwork is gorgeous ,I reallly love the stylized look he brought to comics,and his Hulk is truly monstrus but sympathetic,also give me Karloff vibes

.....Ya know as I am typing I think I like it more thenI dislike it ...But I have three problems

1.Banner and Doc Samsons narration and analyzation got tedious real fast

2.The main focus of the book is Bruce is great in concept,the link of Hulk and Thunderbolt Ross and to qoute Clopain from Hunchback of Notre Dame "Whois the monster and who is the man " ....But also that Betty mightve fallen for Bruce for the wrong reasons,theat she saw the toxic elements of him similar to the toxic elements of her father,and tried to ficx him and...I dunno that just wasnt clear at all till near the end and just felt forced

3.Oh the ending sucks ,after a good final showdown with Ross ,Banners flashback ends with him being yelled at by Ross,then freaking out in Samsons office,leaping away and it just fell flat for me

Oh and a me thing.....I didnt relize this took place after Betty had died till a good way though (I didnt even know Betty had ever died in the comics )

I do reccomend this ,it is good ,but it did fizzle for me.Not Loebs strongest writing,though Tim Sales art make this reccomended

@ariel-seagull-wings @goodanswerfoxmonster@the-blue-fairie@themousefromfantasyland@theancientvaleofsoulmaking @filmcityworld1

[goosefeather]

finished riverstar's home which is uhh the first super edition i actually finished since graystripe's vow?? i wanna say??

anway! final review: not enough death!!!

(actual, long review under the cut)

riverstar's home is Good. granted i had no expectations for it and kind of forgot it was a thing until it came out. but for a super edition that most people were like "huh? riverstar? really?" it really knocked it out of the park

and i just really think that the erins had a theme in mind (finding home and what that means to our guy riverstar) and the text actually supports that. and i know, most books do this and it is something we all had to learn in high school english. however, warriors has a thing where the messaging is telling us one thing but the actual text is saying something completely different (think of like... everything to do with bramblestar)

that being said, i liked reading about a young riverstar (yes, my character tag for him is river ripple and i prefer that but y'know riverstar is shorter) and his struggle to find a place in the forest territory. it's actually a really good coming of age story that really resonates with anyone who has like moved out of their hometown and has felt incredibly isolated because of that (like me!)

also as a dotc Enjoyer i really liked seeing the events from riverstar's perspective. unlike uhh the last two super editions where the new viewpoint didn't add anything (or it retconned something to make it worse!) or added in things that were just kinda... bad (still dont like brushpaw), riverstar was just enough of an enigma that it worked. like from gray wing's pov, riverstar is an Established Cat on the river and he plays it well. but in actuality he's just a lonely guy trying desperately to maintain his friendships while trying to carve out some space for himself. it's interesting and fun and even the one eye and slash bits that i didn't care for in dotc were fun to read about from his pov

unfortunately, this is dotc so the last half Drags. like it makes sense, obviously, after riverstar feels settled into his life and home and new role as leader, someone from his past comes back and makes him question all of it. love it, really. the problem is once they leave and make it a journey! idk what it is but the minute these cats start wandering off territory it turns into a snoozefest. tell me one book where a journey to some place was Fun to Read and you cant say TNP cuz we both know it wasnt

also, im so sorry, i know we love women here and we have to cuz the erins don't but i dont like finch. like the most she shows up to help with fighting slash's rogues and riverstar was like "she was feisty!" or whatever i knew it was So Over. im sick of this thing where they introduce a she-cat just for the purpose of giving our main male lead kits. it was bad with gray wing and slate and it's bad with finch. remember when she almost stayed behind? i was hoping so hard that it would stick

and like compare finch and riverstar to say night and riverstar (im not pitting two bad bitches against each other give me a sec). before riverstar leaves to go back to help the park cats, night is nervous, her and riverstar have been through a lot together and they lean on each other. so she's vulnerable with him and he's like "oh im sorry i dont think of you that way??" and she's like "no!!! you idiot!! as a Friend" and yeah it made sense cuz we've seen them grow together in real time. finch got None of that because she is not meant to be a character and it bugs me

however, clear sky came in to save the day and cause problems on purpose at the end so the book ended on a high note (for me)

and uhh yeah, this is already pretty long and i actually have More Shit to say cuz i genuinely did like this book a lot i just wanted to get my thoughts out while they were still rattling around in my brain

god i didnt even talk about how i wanted more cats to die

[yuridovewing]

now that i think about it? i think The Bumble Scene is actually the worst thing the warriors series has ever done. like, the bar is at the core of the earth at this point, and all of these examples are just as nasty dont get me wrong, but at least with the ableism, a good amount of the cats are shown to be in the wrong. at least with spottedleaf's heart, no one is telling spottedpaw she deserved to be groomed, and (even though it was obviously handled horribly and should not have been done at ALL) her abuser was at least shown to be a horrible person who deserved to go to hell. at least a good amount of the worst shit wc has ever done, like sandstorm's eugenics-esque line in squirrelflight's hope, can be edited out which theyre allegedly working on (not that i give them any credit for that).

but bumble? there is no silver lining. there is no possible conceivable way the so called protagonists come out of this looking good. there is no way the erins look good no matter how you try to frame the situation.

bumble walks into this apparently kind, "good" community compared to the hellzone clear sky is running right now, begging for sanctuary from her abuser, and the protagonists fat shame her, ask her why she doesnt play nicely or ask her abuser to stop, or just "sit and cope", constantly call her pathetic, and then forcibly escort her back to her abuser's home literally kicking and screaming. it is implied that her former "friend" turtle tail let this happen because she looked down on her and also was bitter that their abuser forced her to lie to her. it is also implied that wind runner, another "protagonist", does this so the group has space for her, someone who's more "deserving" because she can hunt and fight already. gray wing, the pov, despises bumble, keeps calling her pathetic and frustrating and fat throughout this, and comes out of this not concerned for her, but relieved that she is gone so he can tap that with turtle tail, and is a little concerned about tall shadow almost folding to let bumble join the group. she is shown to have escaped the house and is starving because she had no one to help teach her to hunt or assist her, nor does she have a home. they do not help her. they keep calling her pathetic. she then gets brutalized and left to die by clear sky who tells the most stupid lie that the protags instantly agree with. bumble is forced to apologize to turtle tail on her deathbed who goes "its ok but yknow you couldnt live with us because youre fat or whatever". gray wing calls her corpse sad and pathetic one more time for good measure. her abuser then comes around in the next book and literally lounges on top of her grave and mocks her. that abuser then gets taken in by clear sky's group where his children adore him and he gets a death by redemption saving them.

there is literally just the erins flat out having the narrative say "this abuse victim didnt deserve help because she was manipulated into a lie, and also didnt deserve to be with the good guys because she was fat and therefore not good enough for us. she was the one at fault for it all and the moor cats are awesome for inflicting tough love. forget about her now, lets talk about how sad gray wing is."

there is absolutely no fanon garbled reason you can invent that would make this better. this scene is important to the plot, so you can't remove it or the character. all of the protagonists for this arc, most of the characters who lived on the moor, have this abuse victim's blood on their hands and they couldn't care less

[volfoss]

3, 15, or 18 for erm thae witcher

oh i am about to be the biggest hater known to man im so sorry

to preface. i avoid the witcher tags for the most part because its me and my 3 witcher mutuals against the world and everyone has bad takes all the time otherwise. so i do not have a TON of experience w fanon there but i have explored it a few times.

3. screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr

surprising amt of geralt is a nepo baby fanfics last time i checked the tag. i stay blissfully unaware a lot of the time w stuff. ACTUALLY. netflix witcher exclusive. when people are constantly talking about how geralt is such a good dad there when he has interacted w ciri maybe 3 times because they removed the really good bonding scenes from the books. i have to be a hater about it bc i think every other adaptation has handled their relationship better and i dont see the appeal of ohhh their found family (with geralt yennefer and ciri) in the shows. in the books yeah. but thats because they actually get time to spend together there. and they didnt make geralt suck as a character. also not on tumblr but the fucking team yenn team triss people on reddit. are we really going to ignore what triss did to that man?????

15. that one thing you see in fanart all the time

i dodge the tags like as much as i can but i feel a big thing is u can TELL what someone is consuming to be into this series because all netflix fanarts have been very um. weird about jaskier in a fetishizing gay men way (how they hc him not how i do etc). also sick of seeing 20 million fanarts where they completely erase every scar the characters have. if u draw geralt or ciri or even TRISS without their scars that are yk. supposed to be defining parts of their faces/character appearances i am blowing you up. stop yassifying grandpa please.

18. it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...

there are two things that apply here imo:

1. the hexer adaptations. you guys just hate fun. in what world is an early 2000s short tv series that has the worst dragon cg due to a very small budget. it is one of the best adaptations of the first 2 books in terms of characters being in character and how they handle the source material. also outside of the one polish comic (the Betrayal/Zdrada issue of Prószyński i S-ka) it is the only adaptation to show geralt's past. it is also really fun with costuming too! they have a lot of clear inspiration but also like. objectively w their budget sometimes it looks bad. its charming to me tho and im SO sick of the netflix witcher hype. sorry #1 henry cavill hater for the role.

2. my BEST FRIEND angouleme. yeah she was only in 2 books but she is one of the characters of all time. to me she is such a good example of both geralts tendency to save people when he does not need to and how they will just let kids be so comfortable and safe around him. she is also just so fucking cool man and again w her being book only (for good reason but im dreading when those get adapted and people are weird about her) character i get why she doesn't get much hype but STILL. she is so fun she will see an insanely old vampire and be like hmm. nickname time for him. yes he could kill me but i stay silly about it.