#the way I could stare at this man all fucking day

[xomakara]

Be Mine [Part 1]

SUMMARY | You’re being stalked and getting creepy and filthy messages from someone named Unknown. Little did you know that person might be closer than you think.

PAIRINGS |  Yunho x Reader

RATING |  Mature, NSFW, EXPLICIT, MDNI, 18+, Any Minors and Ageless Blogs will be blocked

GENRE |  smut, thriller, random fluff/comedy 

CONTENT/WARNINGS | stalking, creepy and filthy test messages, profanity, mentions of drinking, lots of sexual acts/thoughts, voyeurism, unprotected sex (wrap it up ya’ll!), public sex, dirty talk, fingering, oral sex, vaginal penetration, creampie, multiple orgasms

LENGTH |  14,264 words

TAGLIST |  @heechwe @lovetaroandtaemin

NETWORKS |  @illusionnet @cromernet @k-vanity

@othersideoutlawsnetwork @ksmutsociety @dove-net

AUTHOR’S NOTE |  Big, big, thank yous to @unholywriters, @kwanisms, and @lovetaroandtaemin for beta-reading this. I couldn't have edited this without your help! Big shoutout to @pars-ley for the beautiful banner! I appreciate you all so much! This is different from what I usually write (I know, I said that about a lot of other fics) but thriller is not my forte but I decided to delve into it. I hope you all like it and see you in part 2! 💚

He stood in the shadows, looking up into your window, for the fifth night. Your neighbors were out, their car idling in their driveway, leaving him unobserved. You, too, were unaware of his presence, busy getting fucked, face first in the sheets.

You looked oh so sweet, taking that cock. Taking it again and again while he rubbed his hand down the front of his jeans and wondered if you'd look this sweet taking his own. Your eyes glazed over in lust, face contorted into an expression that would have given any man cause to smile, you had no idea that he was right outside, staring into you.

Not that he planned on fucking you. Not anytime soon. He'd thought about it. Of course. Would you give yourself to him the way you were so easily giving yourself to another?

You had a type. Pretty college boys. Trust fund kids. Cocksure and full of themselves, despite the lack of worldly experience they actually had. Oh, he was handsome, tall and lean, but he wasn't a boy. No. He was a man, all man, and he would fuck you the way you needed to be fucked, the way your inexperienced lovers couldn't hope to.

His gaze never wavered as he pulled his length out from his pants, fisting his already throbbing cock to the sight of your soft skin covered in a sheen of perspiration. His feet scuffled further into the darkness to make certain no passers by were likely to happen along while his thumb grazed along the slit, sending a shock of pleasure up the shaft.

All the while, he thought about how hot and tight and wet your cunt would feel wrapped around his cock, bouncing on top of him, sliding him in and out of your snatch. Wondered what pretty sounds would pass those plump pink lips and if that beautiful gaze would glaze over just as pretty when he pumped his seed deep inside of you.

He watched as your young lover finished off before you had a chance to cum. Watch as he shrugs on his clothes, giving you a small kiss before leaving your apartment. Watch as you laid back in bed, fingers reaching for that favorite dildo of yours, your only companion these days.

A smug satisfaction washed through him as he saw you glancing into the dark corners of your room and through the curtainless window. Even in the dim light of the moon, he knew you didn't see him, your mind having no reason to think you needed to keep the bedroom windows covered, especially now with the tall apartment complex at the front of your building blocking your view.

So, instead, you leaned forward, giving the viewer, whether you knew you had one or not, an ample view as you slid your toy in and out of that warm pussy. So pretty and so sad to do this alone when you could have had a nice strong cock between your legs right at this very moment, replacing your poor toy.

As his balls grew tight and he blew his load, all over the front of the complex, the man promised himself he would visit you soon. Very, very soon.

"Yunho!"

"Oof!" Yunho grunted out as his friend threw herself at him, arms wrapping around his neck and nearly strangling him in the process.

"Geeze, woman!" He grunted out as her petite body continued squeezing his neck, laughing and pulling him closer as she tried to squeeze the life out of him. "You act like you didn't just see me last week."

"Yeah but now you're part of the company!" You gushed happily, pulling back with a brilliant smile plastered across your face. "We have to celebrate. Drinks after work!"

"You think Hongjoong is going to agree to that?" Yunho questioned, though his smile was already spreading, enjoying the way you squealed excitedly and dragged him towards the office the rest of the way.

"Pfftttt. Like Hongjoong even does a lot of work here," you teased, bumping your shoulder lightly into his side before giving him a cheeky grin as you continued your stride into the office and pushed the door open.

"Someone's talking shit," a voice spoke up as soon as they entered the room.

Yunho tilted his head up, laughing as the older man pinned you with a fierce stare. "Don't pretend you don't deserve every word of it."

"Traitor," Hongjoong cursed with a laugh as he leaned his hip on the desk, arms crossing over his chest as he gave him his attention instead. "Thanks for agreeing to do this."

"Who am I to turn down an old friend," he replied honestly, and you quickly turned and bounced onto your feet.

"The real question," you started, sauntering over towards your boss, "is who's paying for the drinks."

Hongjoong cocked a brow at you, smirking as you danced from side to side before him. "I think you should buy drinks for the whole company. Since you seem so insistent."

Your face twisted into a look of mock horror. "Is the almighty Kim Hongjoong, owner, president, and CEO of ATZ Gaming, telling his most beautiful employee to empty her wallet?"

"I thought I was the most beautiful person here?" Another voice chimed in, Seonghwa stepping in, the second and most trusted employee of ATZ Gaming after Hongjoong.

"You are," you cooed at him, not batting an eyelash, "but I have to throw in some extra charm to get what I want."

Seonghwa chuckled, leaning back against the wall next to Yunho, clasping his friend on the shoulder in greeting. "What is it you want, little liar?"

"Buy us drinks after work," you sassed, grinning brightly at both the men, turning on them. Seonghwa clucked his tongue and glanced over at Hongjoong. "Hey, don't ask him, I was the victim here," you pleaded, hands flailing out dramatically.

"Are we finally having a party?" Yeosang suddenly peeked his head up over the corner of his computer, hair mussed from his earlier activity. "I have some news that could definitely be celebrated with a drink."

"Yo! Yunho is finally here!" Wooyoung called out loudly from down the hall, legs carrying him faster as he waved excitedly. He looked quite fetching as he came around the bend, dress pants pulling tight over his toned muscles, light blue shirt fitted against his upper body. "Welcome to the madhouse!"

Hongjoong, unable to keep the charade anymore, laughed and clasped a hand on Yunho's shoulder. "When I asked all my friends to join me in this company I started, I did not imagine all of them would act like a bunch of kindergarteners, but what can I expect?"

"You love us!" San and Mingi announced in unison as the two rounded the corner.

Jongho followed shortly after, stretching his back as he joined the rest. "Tell us we don't have anything scheduled, please," Jongho spoke up as he settled into a comfortable seat.

"There was supposed to be a party planned for Yunho today but someone failed in their task."

You rolled your eyes, glaring at your boss. "The lovely Hongjoong hasn't agreed to pay yet."

The office of ATZ Gaming was full of the same individuals from middle school, the same ones he had grown up with and spent more time with than anyone else. Hongjoong was the owner of the company. An IT expert and coder. The man was a genius with all things electronic, and his vision was the game of the year right now. An RPG simulation video game that drew so many of its users that it was slowly creating an empire of its own.

You were hired as the lead writer. After high school and starting university, you'd immediately fluttered into a variety of career options that had suited your style. Advertising, commercial art, animation. Though you always ended up circling back around to game telling and concept art, so when you heard that Hongjoong had quit his job and was striking out on his own, you were one of the first calls he'd made.

When you began writing the storyline for Hongjoong's game, and word started going around how good it was, Seonghwa quickly joined forces, a PR rep in the works, followed by San, whose graphics were lovely, and Wooyoung, a known social media sensation and marketer. And the game was finally taking off.

Yeosang and Mingi came along as programmers after the two had spent nights working and perfecting a gaming system that had completely baffled even Hongjoong. And their reputation followed soon after.

Last, but not least, Jongho. Despite being the youngest of the crew, he'd been an IT prodigy that helped support and maintain their website as the company's traffic exploded, helping to launch their product and set them apart from the others.

Yunho, being the newest hire for their sales and marketing department, was familiar with all of their talents, and would be responsible for marketing their product with an enthusiastic eye that would be a strong addition to their group.

"Of course, I'm happy to take all you dorks out for a drink," Hongjoong pulled his attention, glancing over at everyone and holding a stern finger up. "After you all have finished the reports you were supposed to turn in."

"Boo!" You stuck your tongue out at your boss, huffing out your frustration as you trudged over towards your cubicle and dropped into the chair, head buried into the crook of your arms.

"Cheer up princess," Seonghwa laughed as he swiped up his report, moving over and handing the page over to you. "Have a glance over this before I turn it in."

You groaned louder, head shaking at him as he shrugged.

Yunho simply stood quietly off to the side, watching his friends go through the mundane tasks of their work, yet they all appeared so cheerful and energetic in this atmosphere, constantly teasing and cracking jokes. A wide smile spread across his lips. His fingers were twitching in anticipation of being able to do work for the company, already wanting the day to be over so he could go have that drink with his friends and have some fun.

After three long hours, you finally shuffled out of your chair, grabbing onto Seonghwa's elbow, leaning up against the elder and looking up at him with those huge doe eyes. "I'm hungry and my ass is sore, please tell me we are done for today and can have that drink."

Seonghwa looked at Hongjoong. "May the princess get drunk this fine Friday?"

You snorted, slapping his chest with a smirk as he grinned and pinched at the end of your cheek.

"Why not? It's Friday, and it will be an evening well spent," Hongjoong smirked, shutting his computer down and shrugging on his leather jacket. "Come on. My treat. As a welcome to the team, Yunho."

He sat in the corner of the bar, watching as you smiled up at your friends and playfully ran your fingers along the chest of an older man in a button-down shirt, the two of you whispering things back and forth. The group was a large one, a rowdy bunch that was currently taking up several tables off to the side. A good amount of them were handsome, all young and athletic. Different than your usual flavor of college boys and nerds.

He watched you and the man share a quiet joke. Watched as the male leaned in to whisper something against the shell of your ear, watched the pretty curve of your mouth part, giggle flitting free at the secret passing between you.

His stomach tightened, not because he was upset, or because he didn't like how he watched as your hand curled into the fabric at the male's waist and tugged at the expensive threads there, but because he imagined it was himself you were whispering to, him whose pants your fingers were digging into, him whose warmth you were stealing away with that pretty little smile.

What were you whispering about? What dirty, naughty little secrets were you whispering? Was it about getting fucked tonight? Hard and thorough. This man looked like he would satisfy you more than those little boys. This man didn't seem shy. Not with the way his hand brushed over your bottom, fingers cupping against the supple skin there for a moment before falling away.

When the hours passed, and the laughter began to dim, the group decided it was time to retire, and the group departed the establishment. He stayed behind. Making sure to keep close to the exit while also blending in. He watched as you and the man walked along the sidewalk, arm tucked under his, your soft giggle wafting in his ear when he bent low and whispered again.

He kept to the shadows as he followed, thankful that the night was cloudy and obscured his view, especially when you stopped walking and tipped your head back, gazing up into the handsome man's face, the two standing close, talking quietly as if they had forgotten the world around them. When the man leaned down and brushed his lips over yours, that's when he truly felt a twist in his stomach, a heavy, sickening roll.

His fists clenched into balls, unable to drag his eyes away from the sight. Your body stiffened at first, unsure, clearly the sudden motion took you by surprise, but when you leaned forward and melted against him, that was when his chest clenched.

When his hand came around your waist and he pulled you forward and dipped his hand down and grabbed the bottom of your ass, it was hard not to grit his teeth.

When the male shoved you against the brick wall of the nearby alley and dragged his lips down along the column of your neck, his eyes flared.

How far were you willing to take it in public? This would cause a scandal, wouldn't it?

Did that make you excited?

Did you want everyone in town to see, to watch, as he bent you over and fucked your little brains out? Or did you just want to get caught, the thrill of potentially being seen.

Did it matter?

As long as that cock got shoved inside of you, as long as the pretty moans escaped your parted lips, then who gave a fuck.

As your knees buckled, and you moaned out as the man's fingers curled under your skirt and sank into the soft flesh between your legs, his feet started to move. When the man hoisted you up and pressed you harder against the wall, and your arms and legs wrapped around him, the sounds of slick and wet mixing as the male's length entered you and pulled back out, his stride picked up speed.

Fuck, what he wouldn't give to have you in his arms, hot and wet and needy and letting him fuck you wherever and whenever the fuck he wanted.

When the male's movements picked up, body thrusting harder and faster between your spread legs, he watched the way you moaned louder and threw your head back against the wall, and he wished it were him taking you, ruining you.

You were enjoying it. Clearly. Enjoying that big dick sliding in and out. Enjoying that full feeling, letting the man claim you as his.

You looked like an absolute angel as he fucked you, a filthy fucking angel, hair tangled over your shoulders, the silk strands clinging to your cheeks as the sweat formed, skin glowing underneath the flickering streetlight overhead.

This man was ruining you. Just the way he would soon ruin you too.

How he longed to have that pink tongue swirl over his own, feel those tits press against his chest, his length snug and buried deep.

Soon.

Very soon.

When you cried out, your orgasm splashed all over his shaft, the male was right there behind you, his hips erratic, chasing after his own high. As he painted the inside of you, cum spilling and dripping down the sides of his dick as you clenched tightly to milk him for everything he had, the man pushed his hips harder against yours.

You had a completely satisfied expression, limp and tired as you came down from that intense moment, the passion that had overcome both of you leaving you entirely spent.

There was a sweet giggle as the man placed a kiss on your lips, a soft murmuring, another sweet peck to your lips, and the two of you stumbled away together, the man holding onto your waist, keeping your spent, stumbling body upright.

His feet had carried him forward when you disappeared, following the wet steps down the darkened alley. That was where he saw it, a pair of pale pink, soaked, cotton panties, hanging over a discarded can.

His hand shot forward and he gripped them, crushing the fabric between his palms and pulling it back with him.

Soon.

He would visit very, very soon.

Seonghwa made his way towards your desk, setting down a steaming cup of your favourite tea. "Okay, princess. Go home."

"I'm almost done with this report. Give me twenty minutes,” you replied, smashing the keyboard.

"Pfft. You said that four hours ago," he scolded, squatting down next to your desk so he was level with you. "Go home. Finish it tomorrow. Come into work late. Sleep in. Whatever will make the princess happy."

"Why is Y/N always getting the special treatment? Hyung, aren't I cute too?" Wooyoung sulked, tugging on his collar and pouting his plump lips. "Tell me you love me more."

"Back off, lover boy," you grumbled, sipping at the tea he'd brought over, moaning softly at the delicate flavor. "Hush and mind your own business."

Yunho laughed, placing a hand on your shoulder, a soothing motion, urging you to finish your work for the night. "The sooner you finish, the sooner we can get dinner, if you're down for that."

"I want Seonghwa's undivided love too!" San whined loudly, stepping around Jongho as he shoved his way past Wooyoung and Yeosang. "I want my cute hyung to baby me too."

Seonghwa quickly backed his way into the elevator before the crew ganged up on him.

"I have a date, so I gotta get going," he smiled, lifting his hand and  giving the boys a two-finger salute. "Y/N, have a good night! Everyone else, see you all tomorrow."

You turned to Yunho, a bright smile on your face. "That offer for dinner still on the table?"

"For you, always," Yunho smirked, leaning down and grabbing your purse, placing the strap around his wrist before pulling you into his side with a gentle tug. "How does pizza and a movie sound? You can go to mine, or we can go to yours, whatever works for you."

You didn't notice Wooyoung's raised eyebrow, the slightly quirked up lip as he observed the two of you. "Oh? Something going with you two that we should know about? You've been spending a lot of time together recently."

"Shh," you stuck your tongue out at the teasing male. "Jealous?"

"You're not my type," Wooyoung sassed back, wrapping his hands over the shoulders of Yeosang and Mingi. "You've never been my type."

"Sure, says the guy who had a crush on me in high school," you called out, shoving your keyboard back into place and shoving the papers on your desk aside. You swung your purse over your shoulder, hooking an arm through Yunho's.

"Hey, that was years ago, I've grown. I have better taste," the younger male started with a childish scoff, pulling the other two guys along towards the exit.

Yunho just stood and listened as you waved and stuck your tongue out at Wooyoung, yelling at the rest of your friends a goodnight. You were such an adorable, flirty brat with the others. His smile never waned. It was fun watching the interactions and teasing. His hand curled over yours, pulling you along next to him.

"Seriously, I can have food delivered to my place, or we can head to a drive-thru," he paused and shrugged his jacket off, dropping it over your shoulders, adding an extra layer for warmth. "Which will it be?"

Your fingers dug into the thick fabric as you peered up at him through your lashes, admiring the smile stretched wide and happy across those soft lips. You loved hanging out with Yunho. He was a nice escape from work, and outside the office, it felt more intimate. More personal. Like you were the ones having fun with each other, not work friends just playing around in the comfort of each other's presence.

"Oh my God," you squealed, tugging at his hand excitedly, "are you inviting me over?"

He snickered, pulling his jacket closed over your chest. "If you'd like. We could share a pizza, have some wine, listen to music..."

"Is this a date, Jeong Yunho? A date-date?" You puffed your cheeks at him. "Not as friends, right?"

His finger hooked under your chin as he leaned in, causing your eyes to flutter as you stared at the mischievous expression on his handsome face, unable to break away. His head cocked slightly. "And if I said yes? What would you do about it?"

A fierce blush warmed the tips of your ears and you pulled his jacket up further, trying to hide the excitement building, the giddiness bubbling up. You nodded, teeth biting into the meat of your lower lip. "Let's just say... I wouldn't mind if it was a date."

You pretended not to notice that he was still holding onto your hand as the two of you left, pretended not to hear the excitement in the sound of his laugh as he guided the two of you down the quiet sidewalk.

He could have anyone, so why did he pick you? Okay sure, you two knew each other and had been friends since middle school. And sure you had the biggest, fattest crush on him in high school and your feelings never went away, so... Why not?

You had your fair share of dating and sleeping around, a couple flings and things that lasted for a few months. It was easy to find dates and go on a variety of dates and sleep with attractive guys... yet they never scratched that itch. They always left something to be desired, and eventually, the shine would wear off and you'd both move on and that would be that.

It wasn’t that the guys weren't attractive, weren't charming, weren't funny, or weren't sweet. They just... Never clicked. You'd have sex with them, unsatisfying sex at that,  that made you walk around the rest of the day wondering 'is this it? Are these the types of guys I've been going for?'

Seonghwa was the closest to having something steady. It was sweet, comfortable. Until your spark just kinda... died? It wasn't anything either of you did. No drama. No cat fight or argument. It just naturally fizzled out and the two of you stepped back into your friendships, and when either of you got horny, the other person was always a phone call away.

But with Yunho? Well, that was a whole other animal. It was butterflies. Nerves and awkward laughter and racing hearts. You felt young and silly again. And you were positive you weren't the only one. The attraction was a mutual thing, which made it more thrilling. You didn't just imagine it, and the heat simmering and smoldering was equal between you.

He lived just outside the main district in a cute studio apartment over an art gallery. Your breath caught every time you saw his smile and his arm slung around your shoulder, keeping you close, that hand drifting back and forth along your arm, knuckles tickling at the flesh at your collar bone as he giggled.

"Home sweet home," he stated proudly as the two of you climbed the steps to his home and stepped inside, toeing his shoes off. "It’s tiny, but cozy and private."

As soon as you stepped into the door, you were in awe. It was exactly like Yunho - handsome and modest and masculine. A king-size bed with deep maroon sheets, dark curtains, and lots and lots of pillows. And his desk had several pictures in frames, displaying memories. There were tons of photographs, including lots of you and the guys from when you were kids and teens, to more current versions, the most recent from the company welcome party for him.

"Jesus," you breathed out in a rush, stumbling forward as your eyes continued to scan the space, landing on the long sofa that sat to the right and his kitchen which looked tiny, "wow, look at you, mister fancy pants. You really landed yourself on your feet."

"Ha!" Yunho cackled, hand clasping onto yours. "It's nothing like where you and the other's are living, but it's paid for and cozy. Let me order the pizza, then we can get comfortable."

"By comfy, do you mean cuddle up and watch a romantic drama?" you wiggled your eyebrows.

He hummed, pulling his phone from his pocket. "Will that make you feel good?"

"Are you offering to make me feel good? Orrrr..." you started.

He shook his head, a laugh gracing his lips. "The usual order?"

You gave a nod, stomach rumbling as if answering his question for you.

He smirked, snagging a pillow and tossing it next to the spot on the couch you would claim, waving his cell phone to remind you to wait patiently while he orders food for you. He vanished into the kitchen, a silly smile on his lips.

You wiggled out of his jacket and tucked the large pillow against you, hugging the warm clothing close to your body. If you closed your eyes, you could easily imagine him embracing you. His scent surrounded you, and you found that it helped calm your jumbled nerves, keeping that level head that usually evaded you whenever this tall, handsome giant was standing too close, looking at you with those intense, kind eyes.

Fuck. This was an actual date.

With Yunho.

A dream come true.

And just how were you supposed to handle yourself now?

Yunho had finally started paying you more attention lately, and sure, the group hung out a lot together, but this was a little bit different, right? It certainly felt more than friendship, and if you were reading his signals right, then the interest was there, especially tonight.

So then, maybe it was possible for the two of you to work. Maybe?

When Yunho finally rejoined you in the living area of his home, he held up two glasses and a bottle, a wide grin spread across his lips. "Drinks?"

He glanced around the area as the two of you chatted, laughing and making small talk while you waited on the pizzas. As the film played and the food was eaten, you relaxed into the sofa, cuddled up at his side, eyes locked on the screen. His fingers caressed the strands of your hair and rubbed a gentle path over your arm, touch drifting back and forth, but not far.

There was comfort, and you sighed. His affection was soft and steady. You relaxed against him, happy to finally have some alone time with him, just the two of you in your little bubble. His scent enveloped you, and his arms cradled you like you belonged here. 

"Can I ask you something? You can always refuse," you nodded, a curious gaze moving over to find him chewing on his lower lip and looking at the floor. "Okay. Well... Do you... Am I... Would it be too weird if I told you that I really like you? And not just as a friend?"

You took the moment to process this question, staring at him for a solid five seconds before you sat up. "Wait what?" you blinked in confusion.

"Oh god, nevermind! This is awkward now," he ran a hand through his hair and you tried not to laugh as his face turned a bit pink and looked away. "Just forget I ever asked."

"Hey, come back," your hands cupped his face and you turned him so you could look into his eyes again. You tilted your head up, lips brushing against his. "I like you too."

He didn't speak and just closed the distance. His lips moved against yours, slowly parting open, pressing firmly yet softly as you relaxed your mouth against his and let the pleasure of the feeling flow through you. Your hands ran along his face, into his hair, curling the soft strands around your fingertips.

The kiss is soft and gentle. Unhurried and eager, but not rushed. His arms tightened around your waist, and you moved in his lap, adjusting your legs on either side of his hips and seating yourself properly, so you were facing him and comfortably slotted in.

You nipped playfully at his plump lip and parted your mouth open, smiling against him.

"What's so funny?" Yunho asked, tilting his head at you curiously, tracing his finger along your cheek.

"It's not, I don't know, I was worried that there was an attraction here because I've liked you for ages but thought nothing would happen, but like..." your head dropped onto his shoulder and you stifled the nervous giggles against his throat. "This feels really good? I'm having a hard time wrapping my brain around the fact that you like me too."

You couldn't help the grin from pulling at your lips and he chuckled.

"Don't you smile at me like that," you said with mock annoyance, pulling back and playfully hitting at his chest. "It's all your fault. You've grown up hotter and even better as the years passed. You're too tall. Too charming. Too sweet. Just everything, it makes my heart jump and I like you, so what now, you idiot?!"

His hands curled tighter around your waist, fingers digging into your shirt and he gazed down at you, a large smile plastered across his lips. "Let's start dating and take things as we go."

"I really like the sound of that," you smiled.

When you returned home that evening, Yunho walked you to your front door and lifted you into a tight hug, inhaling your scent and holding you close for a few more stolen moments. It was only a kiss goodnight; a sweet, passionate, deep kiss that set your skin aflame.

His smile had never been brighter, and you touched your fingers to your lips, feeling the burn of where his kiss still tingled, even though it’d long disappeared. "See you in the morning, okay? I'll meet you at the office. Don't be late."

You giggled, "Don't worry. I won't be."

Now there you were, home alone, wanting nothing more than for those hands to return to you. You sighed contentedly as you slipped the jacket off your body and placed it carefully on your dresser, smiling at the scent that fills the air and reminds you of Yunho. The evening had been perfect, everything just like a fairy tale came to life. You felt on top of the world.

But, like any other person, that peace and serenity would not last forever, not on your side, and especially not for the monsters watching your every move.

Ping.

Ping.

Ping.

That dinging startled your sleep, but your eyelashes fluttered as the vibrating continued and you groaned, knowing it must be something important. When your phone sounded a second time, the vibration caused a shudder on the surface of your dresser, you reached over and tapped the screen.

The text had your eyes going wide and your blood turning into ice in your veins.

Unknown: Looks like you had fun with your new boy toy. So cute. I wonder what will happen next time.

Unknown: You have a gorgeous smile.

Unknown: Be careful, little doll. Monsters are watching you.

You weren't surprised that Yunho was early the next morning. In fact, you were already seated in the break room, sipping a mug of terrible coffee, half asleep as you stared out of the glass wall, your eyes fixated on the downtown buildings a few blocks away, mind and gaze drifting about aimlessly.

Yunho poked his head through the door, finding your slumped form immediately, that stupid, shy smile coming onto his face. When he joined you at the table, his arms stretched out on either side of you and pulled you gently into his chest. His chin rested on your shoulder as he breathed against your cheek.

"How'd you sleep?" he questioned, a large palm rubbing soothing, firm circles on  your arm.

"I'm so sleepy I might die," you buried your head in his chest. You were not going to tell him about those weird texts or that you tossed and turned all night, eyes glued to the screen in case the person tried texting again. How could you tell him that? Or the others?

He chuckled. "Well, don't die quite yet," his nose nuzzled your hair and his lips brushed your earlobe in a playful nip. "I need my girlfriend around, y'know."

Your heart stuttered, heat and flooded your cheeks. His girlfriend... You liked the sound of that. You glance over his features and study his expression as it lingers for a moment before it drifts back to that smug smile.

"Girlfriend... I like the sound of that," you playfully pushed his arm, biting into your lip and trying not to swoon, his reaction had you floating on cloud nine. "And what would my boyfriend say about the coffee at work, huh?"

"I'll run to the shop in a few," he stated, "Whatever my girl likes."

"Oh God, I really love the sound of that," you nodded.

He stood up straight, pulling you out of the chair and giving you a quick squeeze. "Come with me to get your daily dose of liquid sugar. It's on me."

"Are you guys always going to be gross now?" Wooyoung questioned, dramatically putting a hand over his heart, as you walked past his cubicle, laced hands swinging.

You nodded. "Absolutely. I'll just be loud so everyone can know how much my man adores me."

"Did I hear 'man'?" Hongjoong questioned from his own office space, popping his head out to investigate what had caused your shriek. "Did Yunho finally make a move, because God knows we were about ready to stage an intervention."

"Please, everyone knows she's wanted Yunho since the seventh grade," Seonghwa chimed in, poking his head over his cubicle wall.

"Come on," Yunho laughed, pulling you along to the elevator, "I think we've done enough entertaining."

You flipped a rude gesture over your head as you walked. "Bite me. See if I ever get you guys coffee!"

"What!? I didn't say shit!" Jongho yelped from the back, clearly getting caught up in the shenanigans.

You stopped as the two of you waited outside, leaning up onto the balls of your feet and placing a chaste, sweet kiss against his lips. He hummed happily and melted into the feeling of your kiss. His smile was radiant when you parted ways. He quickly leaned down again, pecking the tip of your nose and before reaching out to grab your hand, keeping them tangled while you both crossed the street towards the closest coffee shop.

The two of you stayed for an hour, enjoying the cozy atmosphere, drinking more coffee and hot chocolate. You enjoyed the company, and you simply couldn't wipe the smile off your face as he watched you from the other side of the table. He seemed in his own blissful thoughts and for a moment, everything felt unreal.

The entire day was filled with giggles and stolen moments. You may have disappeared to his cubicle for a make-out session at lunch when the rest of your coworkers disappeared. He sent suggestive texts throughout the day, making sure you knew just how interested he was.

God, his kisses were fantastic, addictive, and oh-so wonderful, it made the ache between your legs even harder to control. All day, all you could focus on was him and that smile, or his handsome face. Or the feel of his skin as you moved to help him. The way he leaned and followed you around like a lost puppy, unable to take his eyes or his hands off of you, stealing those gentle little touches whenever he could get away with it. It was driving you crazy. You were high on hormones.

Fuck, what was it about the beginning of a new relationship that made you feel drunk, and hyper-sexual? All the excitement and anticipation of what could happen, the chance of being alone or maybe sneaking away for something even more private? You felt like an addict and your thirst would likely be unquenchable.

By the time dinner rolled around, and the crew decided to head to a bar on the waterfront for food and drinks, you were floating on air and Yunho was hugging his arms tight around your middle, chin resting on your shoulder like some protective shield, a happy smile stretched across those gorgeous, pink lips.

"Jesus, you two look disgustingly cute," San chirped up, fiddling with a menu, his elbow leaning on the table.

"Yeah, can you please refrain from being so adorable? We're still processing," Yeosang joined, rubbing his face.

"I'm serious, it's sickly sweet. My heart might just fucking implode," Mingi punctuated his sentence by shoving a fry into his mouth.

"Jealous, much?" You leaned forward, eyebrows raising in challenge as Mingi pouted.

"What I'm wondering is," Yunho held up a finger, waving it around the table and frowning, "who has a pool going. Who guessed that this would happen and who thought we'd make a slow, sluggish journey through hell before admitting our feelings? Someone placed bets. Fess up."

The men shared glances, but not a word was said until Mingi finally gave in and folded. "I mean, you two have been making googly eyes at each other forever, so..."

Hongjoong sighed, giving in to the truth and pulling his wallet from his pocket. "Seonghwa, Mingi, Yeosang, and I bet this would be sometime around high school. Wooyoung and San thought it would have happened by our college graduation. And Jongho was confident that you'd get together sometime this year. So, I guess he won the pool."

"I'm a rich man!" the youngest declared excitedly. "Finally, something goes my way, because those idiots are paying for drinks."

"Dicks. All of you," you piped in, unable to hide the smile and the shake of your head. Your coworkers and best friends were such assholes, and it was hard to remember sometimes. But, you loved them, and they've always had your back. You always had each other's backs.

The group ate and shared drinks for a solid three hours. Things got fuzzy after that, though. A lot fuzzier. Everyone was laughing and taking photos. At one point Wooyoung even shoved a fistful of fried calamari up San's nose, causing you both to screech and sputter from laughter, or the food. You couldn't tell anymore, it was all a happy blur.

When you went to the restroom, a text popped up on the screen. Unknown number. Unknown, again. That dark feeling began to build inside your belly and you took the phone with shaking hands into the stall.

Unknown: Thought I saw something cute.

Unknown: Have fun.

"Who the fuck are you?" you whispered. But of course, no one answered you.

Your fingers tangled in his hair as he moved his head down further. His tongue flicked a hot and wet trail between your breasts, tasting the salt from your sweat before moving further to the other pert nipple, rolling the nub with his thumb and licking until the buds tightened.

It didn't take much. You'd been starving for his touch all day long, a whole twenty-four hours spent teasing and trying to remain professional in the workplace, and tonight, all you wanted was his touch. You were laying sprawled on the soft sheets of his mattress, clothes haphazardly strewn around the living room and down the hall where the two of you had started stripping them as soon as the door was closed and locked.

Those long, gentle fingers brushed back the strands of hair from your forehead, soaking in your flushed cheeks and hooded eyes with a playful grin. "Feel good, little one?" he questioned with a low, rumbling growl.

The endearment sounded good falling from his lips and you hummed. "Very. Don't stop."

"So demanding," Yunho chuckled, his fingertips brushing over your ribs and side, giving you goosebumps as he trailed a slow path back and forth until his fingers found their way around your soft belly and down towards the lacey fabric of your underwear.

"Want these gone, or on?" his finger looped through a tiny ribbon-like strap.

You smiled, cheeky and without shame, raising your hips against him. "What would you prefer, hm?"

"Honestly?" Yunho dipped his face closer to yours, breathing a sigh into the sensitive area and making you shiver. "I want to stuff your mouth with these pretty little things while I fuck the breath from you."

"Fucking hell, Yunho, I didn't know you were so... so..."

He bit your neck. "Kinky? You'll soon find out how dirty I can be, especially when my sweet, sexy girl is being so good for me and begging so pretty."

"Shit," your breath caught. "Go right ahead."

"Let me know if you get uncomfortable. We can always stop. My main priority is that you enjoy yourself, okay?" His voice was soft and sweet and a complete contrast to the huskier tone he had only seconds prior. It was a side of him you'd never witnessed before. He was gentle, sweet, and made you feel secure, safe, and precious. "You'll always come first."

His big hands slipped your lace underwear past your hips, off over your knees and ankles, balling them in his hands.

"Open wide, little one," he growled softly, a thumb running along your lip as your mouth fell open, "just like a good girl." He slipped the fabric past your teeth, smiling at you, "Oh, there's a good girl. Looking so pretty, panties stuffed in her mouth like a pretty slut."

A finger slipped into your folds, testing your reaction and finding slick desire pooling around his digits. "Fuck, baby, you're soaking, is that all for me?"

"Mmhm..." you moaned.

"Spread those legs nice and wide. Yes, just like that. What a good girl, such a pretty angel. My beautiful babygirl," a second finger dipped inside your dripping core, scissoring and making room for a third. Your hips rose to meet his touch, whimpering as the three fingers stretched your cunt deliciously and touched all the right places inside. His long fingers filled you, but didn't fully satisfy.

"Look at the pretty slut dripping onto my bed sheets. So messy, my perfect little girl. Spread open like a hungry, naughty slut, her sweet little cunt sucking in the three fingers I've been gracious enough to stuff in that tiny, soaked hole. What a treat you are. Can you even last till the real thing?" He curled his fingers upward and a scream tore past the lace, tearing, but the moan from your throat was lewd and loud. "Is this what you imagined? In our cubicles? Bent over, getting fucked over and over until my seed dripped from this perfect little cunt. Oh, the dirty things I have planned for my pretty little angel. And don't you worry, I'm not anywhere near finished with you."

Yunho brought the slick fingers back to his mouth, wrapping his tongue over them, cleaning them with a lust-filled gaze and the roll of his hips. Fuck, he was ready to explode right there at the sight.

"Would my little one like to taste?" He pulled the panties from your mouth, replacing them with his soaked fingers, his thumb brushing against your lips, waiting for approval, and you sucked eagerly, your own tongue joining and savoring the taste.

"Now turn over, hands and knees for your boyfriend," you squealed a little, scrambling to turn around for him, positioning your ass and knees and knowing full well you must look quite the picture. "Fuck. Baby. You really want it, don't you? Need that cock, and fast, huh?" His thick, bare cock, aligned at your entrance, hot and pulsing. A whine rose, needy and hungry. "Talk to me, little one."

"Fuck," you gasped, gripping the sheets in desperation, his voice was thick and hungry and the words, holy hell, the words. "I want it! I want it so badly! I just... please."

"Please, what, little one?" Yunho stroked his length along your folds, coating his cock with the ample slickness leaking from your core. "What is my girl begging for?"

"Fuck me!" you shouted, pushing your hips towards him, "Fuck your girl, please. Please, I'll be good for you, whatever you want!"

"Good answer, baby, such a good girl," his palms grabbed your ass and slid along your thighs and ass, landing on your hips in a firm grip. The wide head of his thick shaft pressed slowly into your cunt. In and out. His breathing hitched with a grunt when you took him in halfway. "Fuck you feel so good, shit."

Big. He's so big, the biggest you ever took, and the best. He stretched you in the most delicious ways and took you exactly where you wanted it. None of your past fucks even held a candle to this man, and he didn't even fully fuck you yet.

"So big... so fucking big." It was a gasp, a moan, a desperate plea, a whispered prayer on your tongue. You needed that thick cock more than you've ever needed any other.

He bottomed out and you groaned at the sudden pressure. "Good?" His voice was a growl and he leaned into you, licking and biting the curve of your shoulder blade and down to the small of your back.

"Fuck, so good." Your words were slurred from lust and ecstasy. "Oh, yes, right there, fuck."

"My perfect girl takes dick so fucking pretty," Yunho purred. His big hands settled on your back, massaging gently. raises tumbled from his lips, soft, husky groans and soft hisses, deep groans. He moved again, so fucking thick and stretching you more, that when his hips thrusted in sharply, you saw stars, arching and shattering under the touch.

Yunho was the name that slipped past your lips in a frantic cry and then a steady moan. 

"I got you, baby," he mumbled against your back, "just let me have you. I'm right here, babygirl."

You turned to face him and found his intense gaze meeting yours. He leaned forward, pressing his lips roughly to yours. His chest flattened on your back as he drove forward harder, faster, and rougher, setting a fast, greedy, and almost desperate pace, wanting to hear and taste every piece of you.

"T-this. This is what I-I needed. This is perfect. Need you. Oh, God... Yes," you were struggling to get words out.

"That's what I like to hear, tell me more. Fucking pretty girl, I think your tight little cunt should be filled with my cum, so no one else will have you. Would you like that, would you want me to fill you until you're sore and gaping?" He drove even deeper, so fucking thick and hard. He grabbed your chin and tipped your head to watch the desperation that crossed his beautiful, sweat-slick features and the lustful sparkle in his eyes.

You whimpered. "Yessss. Cum for me."

"Then watch the show, baby, gonna make that perfect pussy of yours gape and swallow every bit of me. You'll do that, won't you? Be good for me and keep it all warm and plugged up? Just for me," his thrusts turned sharp and erratic, bouncing your body along the mattress. You nodded, still feeling his palm gripping your jaw. The wet sounds were so loud in the otherwise silent room.

"Fuck, Yunho," your hands gripped onto his wrists, the muscles tensing and straining, working your core with everything he had. "Yes, keep going. Don't you fucking stop. I need it. Oh God, please don't stop."

"I'm right here, little one," Yunho groaned, voice tight and gravelly, his pelvis rocking and bucking, his breath shaking as he pressed closer. His face burrowed between the nape of your neck, his voice low and thick. "Gonna cum now, gonna fucking cum, gonna make a mess in that pretty little cunt. Going to paint you white, my pretty girl."

"Do it," the words came out as a whimper, "Wanna feel you."

Yunho let out a rough and broken growl.

His cum shot out in heavy ropes that coated your insides and slid past your opening, coating you both with an extra slickness. His hand lands over your mound, massaging and keeping a steady flow of pressure until finally, when his last release hit the deepest spot inside you, you saw that white-hot glow in the back of your eyes.

You broke. His name came out on the edge of a sob.

The world turned and spun. He lifted and cradled you against his chest. Pressing warm lips over your pulse and humming when you tucked your face into the hollow of his neck, spent, exhausted, and drifting into the fuzzy nothingness, he whispered tender words in your ear.

"It's okay," he shushed, a warm palm rubbing circles in the middle of your back, "Don't fall asleep on me yet, let's get you clean." He helped you rise and then ushered you to the bathroom. Once inside, he wrapped those massive arms around you again, pulling you back against his chest. "Doing alright, beautiful?"

"Perfect," you whispered.

His grip loosened a bit and his lips grazed against the back of your shoulder and a quiet huff followed. "You did wonderfully, little one." A hum was all that followed his praise. You were far too tired for anything else.

You barely remembered washing up and drying off. You had no clue how the two of you ended up snuggled, legs tangled up. Your head laid on his chest, while his large hand laid on your cheek, rubbing light circles and playing with your hair.

"Yunho," you whispered.

"Hm?"

"Kiss me again," and he did, bringing those soft, puffy lips to yours in a kiss that is no different, gentle, tender, slow, sweet, and exploratory, despite being together intimately already, you both craved that innocent sweetness and the reassurance it would bring.

"How are you doing? Was I too much, too soon?" Yunho asked quietly.

"Never," you scoffed, smacking his chest, "that was fan-fucking-tastic."

"Well, I aim to please," the grin in his tone was evident and infectious.

Snuggled in his arms, warm and protected, it didn't take long before the both of you were softly snoring away, peaceful and perfectly content. You didn't even see the notification on your phone as the little bubbles popped onto the screen.

Unknown: I bet his cock felt good buried inside that sweet, tight, little cunt. It looks lovely, all stretched and leaking.

Unknown: Sleep tight.

You drifted, blissfully unaware.

"A camping trip?" Your eyebrows creased, and your cheeks felt as though a blush rose at the thought.

"Hongjoong thinks it's a great opportunity for some relaxation and bonding after everything, what do you think?" Seonghwa sipped at his coffee as Yunho circled his arms around your waist and rested his chin on your shoulder. "You guys can share a tent and put it far away from us."

"Like far away from us, far away. I mean it," Hongjoong motioned across the span of the field with wild and sweeping hand movements. "I don't need to hear shit, and especially don't need Wooyoung running his motor mouth."

"Bite me," the loud-mouth in question screamed, waving an arm into the air in retaliation.

"And, there's no pressure. If you don't want to, that's perfectly alright," Seonghwa shrugged, but his words weren't nearly convincing.

Yunho smiled. "No, we're totally in. As long as everyone promises not to come within like five miles of our tent in the middle of the night."

"Done deal," Hongjoong immediately stated.

Wooyoung snickered. "Maybe Y/N's loud moans would scare away the bears."

You scowled. "Would they scare the tiny gremlin boy, because, in that case, I'll happily be very loud."

The young male stood up, moving a finger back and forth between the two of you. "Watch your back, Y/N. I might just throw you in the lake while you're sleeping and make it look like an accident. This is war!" He stomped off dramatically towards his desk, pretending to throw a fit.

"Why is he so dramatic? Can we leave him at the camping grounds and pretend to forget him?" Jongho quipped dryly.

The camping trip did sound like fun, especially being able to enjoy it in a small group setting, and without worrying about running into unfamiliar faces, that dark presence that seemed to follow you, stalking and haunting, might stay away. A perfect solution.

The rest of the workday passed in relative normalcy, and before the hour struck five, you had left with Yunho by your side and plans of going shopping were set in motion.

"It's been such a long time since I last went camping," Yunho chattered, skipping around in front of you and leading the way into the sporting goods section, "think they have soundproof tents? Just in case? For when I get super frisky and fuck the breath out of my sexy girlfriend?"

"Jesus christ, Yunho, calm your jets," you laughed, patting his cheeks, "I doubt there's such a thing but maybe we can get lots of pillows to stuff in the corners and walls."

"Perfect," Yunho grins and kisses your palm.

The next two hours flew by, filled with tossing things in the shopping cart, giggles, and teasing. After you managed to find an assortment of things you might need and settled on what looked to be a sturdy tent, Yunho paid. Before heading home to drop off everything, the pair of you went clothes shopping, after deciding that the proper attire included comfortable pajamas, enough clothing to last, and in your case a nice bathing suit to lounge in the lake.

And when Yunho wasn't looking, you grabbed something that was a little... naughty for your favorite kinky giant.

After loading the car with camping and fishing equipment, gear, supplies, a few tents, and a cooler loaded with drinks and snacks, a text came in from the groupchat.

Seonghwa: Load everything into your trucks, we leave tomorrow at 8 am.

Wooyoung: My Jeep will go fast, Jongho doesn't hold back on the gas pedal!

Jongho: You don't drive me. Ever.

Hongjoong: WEAR SEATBELTS!

You: Yes, Joong dad.

Yunho: LOL

Mingi: Dad. Priceless.

Yeosang: He does remind me of an anxious dad.

San: Cannot agree more.

Hongjoong: ....

Yunho: She called him "Joong Dad," isn't that just perfect, Hwa?

Seonghwa: I'm gonna start a drinking game. Take a shot every time you call Joong, "Joong Dad."

Jongho: Count me the fuck in.

"Hmph," you huffed, scrolling through your notifications and catching another. Same number, unknown again. You blinked twice, then opened the message.

Unknown: So sweet, picking up supplies for your boyfriend. And did you have some naughty plans too? Good, so did I.

"Baby, ready to go home and have dinner?" Yunho pressed a soft kiss on the crown of your forehead.

Your head snapped up and your gaze met his, blinking at him. His wide smile met you and your own slowly stretched to match it.

"Ready," you said, feeling sick at the new unknown message.

He watched as you slid your clothes off after a long day and tossed them aside. His hungry eyes trailing over the curve of your soft belly, then your wide hips, then down the round curve of your ass. His gaze lingered on the lacy set of panties you'd picked up the night prior.

So tiny. They don't cover nearly enough of that amazing ass.

His dick twitched in his pants as his tongue darted out and swiped across his plump lips. Laying there, on your belly, not aware of the dark shadow lingering right outside your window, looking on as your soft cheeks and round globes jiggled at every movement, the arousal tinted his stare. His heartbeat sounded rapidly and the blood began flowing directly towards the aching part between his legs.

Slowly, carefully, silently, he tugged the zipper down and pushed the fly of his jeans to the side to wrap his fingers around his swollen cock. A soft groan caught in the back of his throat when he tightened his grip and pumped his length along the underside. Watching as you pulled out that favorite toy of yours since your boyfriend wasn't there.

Oh, was he so jealous right then of that lifeless toy, the silicone dick that slid in and out of your pussy, soaking in the wetness and preparing that greedy pussy for a cock of actual flesh and blood. His mouth watered as the silicone phallus sunk deeper into you. His fingers continued to run along his thick girth and grip the sensitive tip, slicked up with precum, spreading it down and adding friction to his movements. His gaze fixated on that damn vibrator. The thought of bending you over crossed his mind, but then decided that he wanted the pleasure of making you cum on his cock. Wanted the sounds of your cries muffled, wanted you to break into pieces at his hand and only his cock, his cock and nobody else's.

"Fuck yeah, just like that. Grab your tit and play with it like a good, little slut. Such a pretty pussy and ass. Bet my cock would slide in and out real fucking nicely if I bend you over the bed and slam in that wet hole until I fucking paint your insides and mark that tight, hot, soaked cunt." Pumping his length and gripping the swollen tip, he bit back the whimpers and the grunts, so desperately wanting to call out.

"Just a little longer," he groaned, his head tipped back, fighting to keep the volume low, "Gonna make you feel me and make you mine. Soon, baby, I'll make that cunt remember the shape of my dick, stretch you and split you open with my fat cock, make you suckle and worship my cock every chance I get, make you full with me."

"Yeah, babygirl. Gonna stuff your pussy and then plug the cum inside. Fuck. Cum all over that face, that pretty ass and tits." He groaned out.

"Shit," his cock pulsated and throbbed, aching and about to release, "nah, gotta wait."

Stopping his self-love session, he focused his attention back to the show, knowing that with this intensity, with every passing second he got closer and closer to the moment when he'll get the chance to bury himself inside your wet warmth and the deepest, darkest spots. You were always meant to be his, always belonged to him.

Because if he can't have you, no else ever will.

Pulling into the camping lot, the first sight of the trees had Yunho's face lighting up, and you swore that when he looked like that, his cheeks scrunched adorably and his smile a million watts, you had no control over yourself. Every part of him was absolutely precious. Your stomach flipped, and those pesky little butterflies fluttered around and around inside.

Parking alongside the line of trucks and smaller SUV's, everyone scrambled out. A collective yawning, stretching, and murmurs of agreement came in the form of mumbles.

"Gorgeous place, huh?" Jongho raised his hands up above his head, pointing towards the distant view, "Good day for hiking."

"Let's get some tents set up and then explore," Hongjoong murmured.

They set up the tents, arranging supplies and cots. They were in a rush to explore, not that you could blame them. You slipped on shorts and a t-shirt, running up after them, tugging Yunho to come with.

But with him in his element and nature all around, there were things that caught his interest, things that the group explored as they walked through the camping grounds.

"We should try to find a spot not so far into the woods," Yunho's voice pulled your focus and you turned around, meeting the warmth in his eyes. He stepped closer, rubbing his thumb on your cheek. "Sounds good, babe?"

Your eyebrow rose and an inquisitive hum echoed. "Whatever do you mean, honeybun?"

"Welllll," he leaned over, pecking a soft, fleeting kiss on your nose, "we can sit out by the trees, by the lake, watch the sunset..."

You blushed, suddenly knowing exactly where his words were headed. "I think I understand," you grinned. "We packed the earplugs for everyone, right?"

He smirked, cockily, pulling your face closer until his warm breath caressed your lips and teased a response from them, "Sounds like someone is thinking of getting busy?"

"Always," you answered, letting him press his lips to yours.

"Don't worry," his chest shook and his smile lit up the sky, "we have extra earplugs."

"Hurry up, lovebirds!" Seonghwa's shrill screech called.

A light giggle burst forth. "Ready to see the beautiful spot and pick out the perfect tree for our sinful deeds?"

"Too much!" You heard Hongjoong grumbling.

Yunho laughed, breaking free and sprinting, arms lifted in the air, towards Seonghwa, all smiles and eyes closed and sparkling, a few stray wisps of hair falling out and flying through the wind. He turned around, a hand held out to you. "You coming?"

And you ran, meeting his extended palm, lacing your fingers through his, and feeling warmth radiating from him, the bright shine and joy radiating from the man in front of you, loving him all the more, feeling happiness wash over you, too. He brought the back of your hand to his lips and kissed you, a small gesture, but a tender one.

"Hey, now," Hongjoong snorted, walking back over towards you, "keep it PG."

The glare the younger man gave off only caused him to chuckle harder, doubling over in mirth, loud and boisterous, bouncing back from tree to tree.

"Okay," Yunho huffed, arms circling around your back and ushering you forward, "back to the serious business of finding a spot for this lecherous act that Hongjoong believes we have planned."

The snickers from your party began in waves and soon, you were swept up in the infectious fun, laughter surrounding and spilling out and echoing. Yunho pulled you further along, playfully, all lighthearted jests.

Hours later, sitting around the campfire and listening to a guitar, the melancholy strums filled the evening, and the stars sparkled overhead. Snuggled next to Yunho and singing along, you watched the fire flickering.

"What if," San suddenly jumped in and tapped a finger against Mingi's shoulder, "what if we played a game of truth or dare, like we did in high school?"

"No," Hongjoong was quick to shoot down the idea.

"Pleaseeeeeee," Wooyoung's puppy-eyes begged.

Yeosang sighed. "Oh, come on hyung, give in."

"And if they get truth or dare?" Hongjoong points at you and Yunho, "who knows what we'll get subjected to!"

Seonghwa grimaced. "True."

"Pleaseeeee?" Wooyoung cried. "Pretty, pretty pleaseeee?"

"Alright," Hongjoong gave in, a sign of Seonghwa and Hongjoong's long, suffering, and excruciating tale of their school experience. It had to do with those same puppy eyes, specifically, Wooyoung. "But the moment the lovebirds get frisky, I'm shutting it down."

You gave him the most angelic smile. "Roger that, Joong Dad!"

"And so the night continues..." Hongjoong groaned into his hands, elbows propped against his thighs and head tipping into his palms, "why do I enable this nonsense?"

And so the night progressed. Dares were made. Wooyoung sent San to a dark scary area, where the sounds of something like footsteps could be heard. The culprit? Jongho, shuffling his shoes quietly back and forth in the grass. Yeosang ran out to the water and ran around screaming, waving his arms like a mad man, only to do it again - per request from Mingi. Truths were told about silly childhood memories, the most embarrassing moments, the greatest fears, and a few love stories and regrets were spilled, as well.

Sleep eventually took hold of everyone, exhausted from the trip, the music, the singing, and the laughter. Slowly, one by one, each member retreated into their tents. You and Yunho followed, going hand and hand, holding hands. The night seemed to last forever with so much time, a perfect ending to a perfect day.

As soon as you had crawled under the thin sheet and blankets, Yunho pulled you close. He curled a palm around your hip and used the other to lay the crook of your neck onto his chest. You glanced up, pressing a tender kiss to his jaw and looking at the soft expression across his features, so beautiful, so gorgeous, like a dream that never faded.

And then you drifted off.

He watched you slept through the night, unable to take his gaze away. You didn't zip the tent all the way, it hung just loosely enough to where he could easily spy inside, a mistake on your part and he was completely taking advantage of it. The slow steady rise and fall of your chest as your breaths moved through you, a quiet exhale, your plump, perfect lips curling softly, he couldn't look away, couldn't stop staring at you. His fingers dug into his palm, leaving nail indents into the soft flesh.

How he wanted to caress and trail a gentle touch, feather soft, over that delicate skin, to have your heat spread and pulse beneath his palm. It's an agony he wanted to bury himself in, this perfect image of you asleep, so very delicate and tender.

And when his gaze followed the soft curves of your face, his cock is swelling and throbbing. He swallowed hard, imagining those pouty lips wrapped around the girthy, sensitive cock as his fingers wrapped in your hair and he fucked your face and mouth roughly, spilling himself over and over again until you were gagging and struggling for breath.

His tongue glided between his lips, his dick hardening even more from the lewd thoughts of what he could do to you. All the ways, places, angles, things. So, many things he would be doing. And by the end, you'll be addicted to the feeling of him.

Soft snores sounded through the clearing. Then a snort. And a muffled curse. A bark of laughter.

"Jongho! Keep it down." One of the men snarled from his tent. "Fuckin' christ."

And another zipped open and Mingi and Seonghwa stepped out.

"Let's walk around, get some fresh air," Seonghwa whispers as Mingi nods.

His head whipped around the area, knowing the area's layout, having the chance to scope out the place just recently. So, with the dark cover of night and the absence of those who were awake, he stepped back. It was time for him to disappear back to where he was hiding in wait. For as long as he needed to, he would remain waiting, still.

Stalking quietly, his large feet tiptoed out through the darkness and back into the shadows, as he'd always done.

Biding his time until the perfect opportunity presents itself.

Patience.

Days after the camping trip, you were at Yunho's place, waiting for him to get home and you sat on his couch, phone clutched in hand, your attention on the string of texts that appeared earlier. Your jaw clenched, eyeing the words, that unsettling feeling returning.

Unknown: Fun camping trip. Tell me, Y/N, which were your favorite moments? I especially loved when you and your boyfriend fucked each other with the tent flap open while the others were sleeping.

You blinked, suddenly a stone lodged in your throat. You could almost taste the sourness seeping through the text message. The fact that the stranger was lurking, following the group's movement and possibly tailing, was not lost to you.

Unknown: Would you have loved it just a little more if I were the one fucking your tight little cunt and you moaning my name, my big cock sinking into those silky wet walls, my hot cum filling you?

There wasn't a text for a couple of minutes, and then more came.

Unknown: Just let me try and guess, baby. How your soft, tight walls would constrict me, would massage and caress my throbbing cock. How my big dick would feel deep inside, opening you up, stretching that greedy hole, making a mess. I know you like a messy pussy. Would you beg me to cum inside you, fuck that juicy pussy hard and fast, mark your insides with my cum and fill your womb until you were full of me?

Unknown: Your mouth is even better. Can just imagine wrapping my fingers into your hair, that gorgeous face pressed against my balls. Sliding the fat tip between those pouty lips while you lick up the length, suckling on the underside of the thick, veiny shaft. I would make sure that you had trouble speaking the next day, sweetheart, from how hard I would be pounding and slamming the back of your throat, having my cock stuffed down your throat until you can only choke. Fuck, baby, gonna breed your holes until you cant ever take anyone else.

Unknown: What can I do to make you mine, babygirl?

You nearly vomited at those last words, crinkling your nose and screwing your eyelids shut to stop reading them.

But then another came.

Unknown: Be ready soon for my cock and cum, darling. It's going to feel so fucking good.

When the key in the door alerted you, your attention shot upwards and you shoved the phone in the side pocket of your bag and met Yunho's dazzling, gleaming smile and gentle gaze. It seemed like your troubles melted, worries forgotten.

"Did you wait long? Sorry I'm late." His wide, bright smile crinkled his eyes in the most precious way as he spoke, tossing the keys aside and toeing the shoes off and kicking them to the side.

Before you could get up, Yunho had plopped himself next to you, kissing you deeply, softly. His long arm curled around your shoulder, pulling you into his broad chest and nuzzling your cheek, and you grinned uncontrollably.

You pressed the palms of your hand flat to his chest, peeling off and leaning back, giving him a sweet smile, then curled both arms around him and laid the top half of your torso against the side of his arm and placed your cheek on the bone. "Did you have dinner already, baby?"

You shook your head. "Nope. Wanted to wait."

He laughed softly. "For me to come back?"

"Uhuh," you nodded.

"Then," his chest vibrated, and a soft purr thrummed. The rumbling, content and happy and low, is warm. "Let's get up, baby, and head to the kitchen. We'll cook together. Then watch a movie in bed. How does that sound?"

"Do I get dessert later?" You nibbled on his arm.

His deep chuckle responded. "I think a lot can be arranged. C'mon," and he stood, hands at your waist and pulling you up with him. "Let's get cooking and eating, and I'll save that for after."

Your heartbeat and stomach were swarming with the familiar butterflies. Even now, being around Yunho was a sensation. And not even that, not only that, but with those new, strange threatening and ominous text messages that crept up. For a moment, you pushed it aside. Allowed yourself to drift into the moment, wanting so badly to spend more time with Yunho.

After dinner, he wrapped his arms around you and squeezed lightly before leading you to bed. You buried your face into his shoulder, mumbling a faint sleepy sentence or two, not quite making out the exact words.

"And, dessert?" You raised an eyebrow, puckering your lips slightly and gesturing towards him.

He smirked, lifting you and throwing your legs around his waist, strong hands firmly holding your plump ass. Then the familiar sensation of being placed, ever so gently and delicately on the bed. With soft touches, hands roaming and sliding under the fabric, clothes were quickly stripped off.

"Can I have my dessert now? Pleaseeeeeee?" you asked, batting your long lashes and feigning a childish expression.

"Go ahead," he laughed as he leaned against the headboard and patted his lap, spreading his powerful legs wider to show his straining erection. "You were talking about this kind of dessert, right?"

"You read my mind, babe," you said, a teasing wink as you slid towards the middle of the bed and between his thighs.

A low grunt passed his parted lips and a heated stare was sent in your direction. You reached out, wrapping the palm and fingers around his thick cock, the veins pulsating against your skin, throbbing and eager. Leaning forward and licking the swollen head, the little bead of precum leaked out of the tip. Sliding the flattened tongue over the slit, your fingers working up and down and around the width, circling up to the sensitive head, feeling the heat and his eager pulse thrumming as it got harder.

"Shit," a sharp intake of breath. His head tipped to the back, and his teeth sunk into the lower lip, biting back the needy whimper.

Taking the fat tip in and hollowing your cheeks, sliding deeper, letting it hit the back of your throat, feeling it sink further and further in as his fingers cradled the nape of your neck. Your nails skimmed his thigh, catching onto the coarse hair before teasing the hot and velvety hardness, causing the flesh to throb between your lips and around his member, moaning from the taste and scent of the cock, swallowing around the heavy weight, causing the vibrations to send a shot of electricity.

His head thrown back, breathless gasps filled the silence of the room and hands caressed your hair. His hips bucked, slowly and carefully, as though afraid of pushing your limits too far. Your throat tightened around the swollen shaft, drool leaking out the corner of your mouth. Eyes wide, half-lidded and gazing up at him. His cock twitched in your mouth and he made the most sinful sound.

"I'm going to fill your mouth, darling. I want you to swallow it and everything that spills out, make sure to drink every last drop. It's your dessert, after all, right?"

Humming lowly, mouth still full, nodding faintly, a confirmation.

A hand lifted to the back of your head. Slowly, he caressed the soft strands, running his fingers through the locks, caressing the strands. Light scratches, soft and loving against your scalp.

And his body shook hips rocking up, in and out of your mouth, picking up a rhythm. "Swallow it, sweetheart. Drink up."

The warm cum spurted into your mouth as a throaty groan fell, a lustful gaze locked to yours, staring. Those warm, gorgeous, honey brown eyes were full of awe and love as you swallowed and licked every single drop that spilled. You squeezed and swallowed, tightly sucking, eager and willing and sucking him off, desperate and eager and swallowing again.

His thumb grazed your skin, tipping his thumb against the corner of your lips to brush away any semen leftover.

You sucked up every bit, licking the warm and soft tip, letting the fat head roll around on your tongue and using the tip to sweep away the last traces of salty seed. Sucking on the cock until nothing remained.

Leaning back, you watched the reaction, waiting to hear the praise, your boyfriend's blissed out expression. A smile bloomed, a pleased hum passed your lips as he reached out, grasping at your shoulders and tugging you to meet his gaze. "Did you enjoy your dessert? Did you have enough?" He laughed. "No? Guess I have to feed you more."

With ease, he flipped your pliant and small body, your back on the mattress. Pressing his cock along your entrance. Sinking the fat cock into you, taking his time, the wet sounds and hot walls clenching his dick. "My baby needs to be full and satisfied, right?" A breathless moan. The pure, lecherous tone of his voice sent heat into your cunt, pussy throbbing, the slick building up. He pushed the length slowly in, relishing the stretch as your walls hugged and swallowed him. He throbbed against you and pressed forward, cock reaching and sending sparks up and through, tearing apart all inhibition and breaking down that delicate restraint.

He fucked and rutted, thrusting, bucking, and moaning into your quivering, hot cunt.

You were already melting, and the lust only grew more intense, like a burning flame, as the sloppy and wet noises echoed around in the room, loud smacks filling the empty space.

The way his large, strong hands moved to your thighs, urging them to wrap around your waist. Using that to angle deeper, driving himself harder. Until his big cock is sinking into you. Overwhelming you completely as he fucked into your warm, welcoming cunt. He moved his hips faster and rougher, panting and desperately trying to catch his breath. His nails raked into your hips and dragged across your skin, leaving his claim. The noises and smells were all consuming, skin flushed and bruised, red splotchy marks coating your hips.

He felt so fucking good, slamming that girth deep inside you, hitting your spot and pounding it until you were trembling and moaning, almosting screaming, his name. Your body collapsed, turning and face-planting into the sheets as Yunho’s fingers kneaded and spread your cheeks wider. He grunted, eyes blown wide.

And he fucked you more.

"More?" You breathed heavily as his dick, grinding, the bulge filling and pressing along, pressing and touching your spot, teasing it. So big. He was too much, and it felt so incredible. His tip and heavy cock and balls and long shaft were brushing and smothering and his hands were everywhere. In your hair, on your body, everywhere.

"Take it, darling. You feel so good. So soft and good. Fucking amazing." The strain in his voice could be heard. But, god, it wasn’t just how incredible he felt, but his low, husky groans and gasps were taking over your ears. "You love this, baby, don't you? My huge cock fucking and thrusting and feeling good inside you, isn't that right? Can't you feel it?"

The air was suddenly hot, sticky and heavy. Everything felt heightened. He moaned as he kept fucking you, murmurs falling from his lips, his breathing rough as he stared down.

"Yunho, please. Cum in me. Cum, please. Feels so fucking good. Baby," you could barely breathe as his thick shaft shoved, harsh, hitting so deep. Your fingers were clutching and grasping at his back/ Yunho’s head dropped, pressing his forehead along your temple. "Gonna cum, shit, Yunho-"

"Do it," he commanded.

Throwing your head back, eyes clenched shut, shuddering and panting, his warm lips suckled and nibbled the skin along the nape of your neck. "Look at me." His husky, gravelly command was clear, your eyelids snapping open and vision settling on his molten chocolate gaze. "You're mine, okay? Say you understand. Tell me."

You nodded feverishly. "Yes. Only yours."

"Louder."

"Yes!"

"Good. You're mine. I love you, darling. You're everything to me," and then he kissed the side of your cheek, running his palms down along your sides, slowing down to tenderly brush his hand on your sweaty face, wiping the strand of dampened hair that clung. "Do you love me, darling?"

Your heart melted. His passion and fiery intensity is gone, replaced by this warmth that surrounded the space in between and spread. There was that soft, tender voice that had a hint of yearning and hopefulness. You smiled brightly at him. "Of course," you nodded softly. "I love you. I love you. I love you. So much, so, so, so, so much. Never want anyone else. Just you."

His bright, blinding smile and glowing happiness was what had you beaming and grinning back as his eyes turned into those beautiful slits, like a cat. Then, he laughed. It was you favorite sound. Laughter that bubbled, like music. Music, just for you.

You lost yourself in his touch and love.

And the strange text messages were forgotten, vanishing completely out of your mind.

Yunho looked at you, sprawled out, peacefully sleeping after a night of intense fucking and blissfully being knocked out by pure exhaustion. With careful ease, he slid himself to sit at the edge of the bed and picked up your cell phone discarded earlier on the ground. Scrolling through the messages.

What kind of face were you making when you read these messages? Were you disgusted by them? Discomforted? Out of place? Annoyed? Perhaps a bit unsettled? Maybe even just the slightest bit scared? He looked over his shoulder and glanced at your slumbering form.

Yunho was surprised to see that not once had it even crossed your mind that he may be the culprit, the one who would stalk, obsess and prey on his innocent little prey.

But you weren't innocent, were you? You were so damn filthy and lewd, fucking and sucking with abandonment, swallowing the cum and slurping it, begging for more and more and more, not caring who else is watching, just as long as his thick cock filled your greedy cunt. And look at you, lying there, as if you were his property. All his to use and abuse however he saw fit, and you loved it, begging him and moaning and crying for him.

Not once did the idea occur to you, to him, your loving boyfriend, would be the cause behind those messages.

But maybe one day that would happen.

Perhaps you would find out, find out in time, but he had plans for you.

"Yunho?" you murmured, eyebrows furrowed in confusion, blinking the sleep and tiredness away, unaware of the expression plastered on his face. You rolled over to stare, rubbing the edges and corners. "Where did you go?"

"I'm grabbing something to drink, baby. Go back to sleep. I'll be back soon," he responded, voice like the smoothest silk.

Without questioning it, you nodded, mumbled, rolling back over to return to dozing and he quietly walked over to the kitchen. Pulling open the cabinet and fishing a burner phone out of its hiding space, underneath the containers and hidden away, behind the rows. He powered it on and shot a short message.

Unknown: Darling, looks like you enjoyed your meal very much. I'll see you soon. I hope you didn't eat all that dessert. Because there will be a lot more for me to feed and give and for you to swallow.

When it sent, and he received a brief acknowledgement from your phone, he quickly turned the burner phone back off and put it back in its hiding space. Shutting the cabinet, he returned to you, placing your phone on the end table and plugged in to charge overnight, before settling in next to you.

Lifting his arm, he let you slip into his embrace, pulling your face towards his chest, hearing that adorable happy sigh slip through your mouth. When Yunho leaned in, he pressed his lips to your temple. "You're mine, right, baby?"

"Mhmm," you agreed, sleepy.

"Forever?" He stroked your hair. "Not just tonight or tomorrow. But you'll stay with me forever?"

You didn’t answer back immediately, but he felt your nod. It was slight, yet he felt the assurance. The trust you held. And for the time being, it was enough. He decided to hold you a bit tighter, feeling your warm presence at the very center of his heart, where no other could touch. This, to him, was an oasis in the desert of his life. And he felt warm.

Warmth that he vowed never to lose.

He let the wicked thoughts take him. What he had to do, and planned to do. What he could get away with. How he was going to slowly strip apart that innocence of yours, leaving behind a sobbing mess and destroying those bonds of reality.

He wasn’t doing it because he wanted to.

He was doing it because he must.

Because you were meant for him and him alone. You were his from the beginning and no one was going to get in the way.

He buried the darkness away and wrapped his arms more tightly and lovingly around you, letting himself feel the happiness and peace a little while longer before the shadows could reach again.

One thing was clear.

One fact remained.

You belonged to Yunho and Yunho belonged to you.

Even if he had to lock you up and throw away the key. 

[herrmannhalsteadproduction]

Buck's at the grocery store buying his umpteenth bag of flour when he sees a very familiar silhouette waiting in line at the cash.

Tommy.

Three months apart and now they finally run into each other?

At two am at the closest twenty-four grocery store Buck could find? When he's dressed in a pair of holey sweatpants and a stained hoodie with dirty hair and a face full of scruff? No cart! Just him and his twenty-pound bag of flour that he's cradling to his chest like a powdery security blanket?

Amazing.

Awesome.

Fucking perfect.

Exactly how he's pictured it.

As Buck gets closer though, his eyes narrow at the sight before him.

Not at all like he's pictured it.

Tommy's shoulders curl inward as he hunches over his cart, head low. His threadbare shorts hang off of him in a way they never would have three months and one day earlier. His feet are shoved into his shoes without socks.

Tommy hates going without socks.

His curls have grown long and messy, lying limp against his scalp.

Buck carefully sidles up beside him, not quite in his field of vision yet, frowning at how pale Tommy's skin is. Practically grey.

He looks like shit.

For one whole moment, Buck wishes he could feel some kind of vindication—gloat, maybe—but he doesn't have the energy.

Or the heart for it.

And one glance into Tommy's cart has him refocused on being incandescently enraged over the bullshit currently sitting in there.

"What the hell, Tommy?" Buck bursts out, making the man jump and whirl around.

"Ev—Buck, what? What are you doing here? What's—what's happening right now?" Tommy stares at him, wide and unblinking, like he's afraid to take his eyes off him.

"What's happening is I'm saving you from this cartload of crap," Buck says, elbowing his way past him to gain possession of the cart.

He shifts the bag of flour to one arm and uses his free hand to pull out the package of bakery donuts that somehow manage to look cracked and soggy all at the same time.

Then the box of cookies that he knows for a fact taste like they're one step away from cardboard.

Then the cake that says 'Happy Birthday, Leo!' and has a seventy-five percent off sticker on it. He side-eyes Tommy for that one.

Tommy makes a face right back.

Buck keeps going, pulling out the lemon loaf that doesn't actually look too bad, but whatever—his is better.

Everything of Buck's is better than this crap.

...Tommy just doesn't know that yet.

"Just stop! For one second." Tommy reaches out to grab Buck's wrist before he can grab the package of—gross—bran muffins. He takes a deep breath before he finally meets Buck's eyes.

"What is this?" he asks again quietly.

"Me, actually stopping you from making a mistake this time," Buck says, yanking his wrist back with a scowl. He falters for a second when his own words register in his brain, but he shakes it off and grabs the muffins out of the cart, dumping them beside the cookies. "This stuff is all terrible. You deserve better, Tommy."

"It's what they have," Tommy said tiredly.

"Yeah, well, I have better stuff at my place." Buck sets his flour down in front of the unimpressed-looking cashier. "Sorry about that," he says, digging out his wallet. "We'll just take this. And these."

"Oh, I'm allowed to keep the oranges?" Tommy rolls his eyes as Buck grabs the bag out of the cart and places them alongside his flour.

"For now," Buck snips back.

Maybe he'll make an orange loaf.

Right after he convinces Tommy to come back to his place and he feeds him edible baked goods and—and maybe they talk and...

Yeah.

This isn't a half bad plan.

He can work with this.

"Just the flour and the oranges," he says to the cashier, pulling his card free as he flashes a grin at Tommy. Feeling it spread wider when the corners of Tommy's mouth twitch reluctantly in return.

He can work with this.

[thefrontmanscockwarmer]

Ruined

Player 001 x reader [SMUT]

Masterist <- Comment on this post to be added to the tag list

Note: takes place during season 1, bc the marble games seemed so prefect for him. Also remember that Korea currency is LESS than American currency.

“Come on (y/n)” young il pulled at your jacket sleeve. You asked him to wake you right as you had to get up for the next game.

“Ughhh, I don’t wanna” you whined.

“(Y/n)(l/n), get out of this fucking bed or I swear to all things earthly, I will drag you by your fucking hair”

“Mmm, you’re gonna pull my hair?” You smile.

“(Y/n) let’s go, come on” he says. You reluctantly get up, dragging your feet as you did so. Scowling at him as he scowled back at you. “Don’t look at me like that”

“Like what?” You yawn and stretch

“Like you hate me. I’m your husband, you like having me around.” You and In Ho joined the games as an opportunity to have fun. Fortunately, this was right before the VIPs formally arrived. You and In Ho were just having some fun.

You passed Oh il Nam, remembering that he also joined the game, he was the that extended the invitation to you. The 3 of you had a one way ticket to freedom town after this game, as the next one was surely a matter of actual life or death (it was the glass bridge).

You and Young il split up to find 2 other players to be partnered with, as it would validate your ’deaths’ following il Nams steps.

You faked a loss at marbles, allowing yourself to get “shot”. You were allowed out of the game room and into the hallways on the outside of the isolated room. Tracking through the hallways you walked into yours and In Hos shared room.

Jumping into the shower and letting the past few days wash off of your skin. You took care of your basic needs, scrubbing your face and hair, removing the dried blood that was caked to your neck. Sighing with relief that you were finally clean. You put on your black silk robe and roamed your way into bed, setting up your skin care routine as tea boiled.

You comfortably sat reading your book, face mask on, tea setting to a perfect temperature when In Ho walked in.

“Hi honey” you said as he threw himself onto your thighs. “How’d your game go?”

“I hate my job.” He declared loudly. You played with his hair as he gripped your thighs, tightly. “You know not having you these past few days has been driving me crazy…” he trails.

“Shower first. I do not want 5 day old ball sweat anywhere near me. You’ll screw up my Ph balance” you say, eyeing him. He sighed dramatically. “Don’t be such an actor, go shower. You can indulge in me later.” Another dramatic sigh.

“Fine.” He said before kissing both of your thighs and getting up “You are so spoiled” he told you as he looked down at you. You smiled widely.

“Oh am I?”

“Yes, you are. Laying in silk sheets, in a silk robe, a ₩50,000 face mask, I bet, reading a book sighed personally by the author that I got you, and probably the most expensive tea someone in Korea could buy, laying in a ₩20,000,000 bed in a trillion won building” he lists. “With me, a man whose net worth is over ₩6 billion.”

“Ohhh my goodness, yes I’m so expensive” you feigned sadness.

“I’m gonna go shower. Care to watch me?” He teased, holding your dainty hand in his.

“Only if carry me to the bathroom” you say. He drops his head with a smile.

“Of course” he picked slid the blanket back, and picked you up, carrying you to the bathroom and gently setting you on the counter. He stood off to the side so he could look in the mirror, some blood was caked onto his collar and he had a streak that ran down his neck and onto his shirt.

He stripped as you watched him, his bare body being scanned by your calculated stare. He chuckled as he stepped out of his boxers.

“Like what you see?” He said with a cocky smirk. He stood between your thigh coming in for a kiss.

“I will after you shower” you say laughing as you pushed him back. He held your hand to his chest and kissed you quickly. Smiling as he moved away before you could slap his shoulder. He entered the shower, you could deny, he was gorgeous. The way water dripped down his abs, and how his hair stuck to his head.

“Use the exfoliation scrub, In Ho” you remind him. “You haven’t showered in like a week.”

“Yes, my love, I’m aware.” He replied, grabbing the container and showing you. The water turned off and he opened the glass door, wrapping a black towel marked ‘his’ on it. A wedding gift from your cousin. You stared at his body, his cock slightly hard and visible through his towel.

“Now, I love what I see” you say as he wraps his arms around, pulling you toward the end of the counter. He lays a kiss on your lips as he presses himself against you. A light hum left your lips. He chuckled into the kiss. Trailing down your neck to your collarbone, sucking and marking you as his.

“Am I allowed to indulge in you now?” He whispered, playing with your clit. He wasn’t asking, he was telling. Not having him for days was driving both of you insane, you were surprised you both made it that far without running off and fucking in a corner.

“Please do, Mr. Front man” you moaned, moving your hand to drop his towel. He wasted no time in pressing his cock into you. You moaned loudly as he did, he groaned into your mouth as your tongues danced together.

“God, I needed this” he says between kisses. He thrusted inside you, but differently than you expected. Not rushed, not rough, but in a love making, I miss you sort of way. “Fuck I love you” he said in your ear before attacking your neck.

“In Ho, I’m close” you whined.

“So am I. I’m so close (y/n)” he replies breathlessly fucking into you. He sped up, racing towards your climax, his threatening to burst. You heard a voice in your room.

“Oh, In Ho. Where are you?”

“Fuck, fuckkkk” he drawled quietly. His orgasm ruined, he looked at you before looking away wanting to avoid your of obvious frustration. Denied an orgasm, and it wasn’t even apart of the sex. He pulled his dick from you, a whine of dissatisfaction left you.

“Babygirl, don’t be upset with me” he said pulling on his towel. Grabbing his mask on the counter. “It’s my boss” he said leaving the bathroom. You followed behind him to see Il Nam standing in the center of your room.

“Ah, Ms. (L/n)” il Nam bowed. You retuned the bow.

“How are today, sir?” You ask. You had already seen him, but you knew better than to interact, you could see that he had a poor soul on the hook for failure.

“very well today, I am getting ready to go to the hospital and live my final days.” He exclaimed. There was no evidence of sadness in his voice, almost like he was happy to be gone. “Watch of Player 456, he has goodness in his heart. I hope he wins.” He says to you before turning to your husband. You turned away from the an walked towards the big screen on the far end of the room, turning it on to watch the rest of the players, Player 456 was shedding tears as he walked back to the common room. You faintly heard conversation:

“I am ready to go, In Ho.” The old man said. “Please meet me in my quarters when it is time to leave” you walked over and said good bye to il nam, vowing to visit him at the hospital when he was all settled in. he gave a gentle kiss on the cheek. In Ho held onto your waist, allowing you to remove his mask.

“I’m assuming there isn’t time now to finish what we started.” You stated lovingly.

“No, my dear, im afraid not. We are officially interrupted and our pleasure for the moment is ruined. I have to work” he says looking deeply into your eyes. You could tell he wanted nothing more than to continue the love making you were both so excited for, but work called.

“Come say good bye before you leave, wont you” you tell him, kissing his shoulder. He placed a kiss on your forehead.

“ I will. And, I’ll be back to finish what I started with you” he winked before letting go of you and disappearing into the closet.

[gh0stsp1d3r]

hiii! i was wondering if you could do the salesman / gong yoo but make him a professor at a prestigious university, and his student is struggling. but there’s plenty of tension between them, so he invites her over hehe. i’d love to see your take!

key words: older man/younger woman, praise kink, some bdsm, hair pulling, dom! gong yoo, sub! reader, sexual tension, body worship, creampie (maybe), aftercare

professor

MDNI | MDNI | MDNI | MDNI | MDNI | MDNI | MDNI | MDNI

A /N: ADORE THIS. Sorry it took a while ):

WARNINGS: age gap, p in v, professor x student (ALL OF ARE AGE), Sir kink, praise kink, professor kink, bondage (tying up hands w/ rope), unprotected sex, creampies

MASTERLIST

Every day, like clockwork, you sat in the same exact front seat, directly in front of him. You batted your eyelashes at him innocently, biting on the tip of your pencil and creasing your eyebrows in that adorable way when you were confused.

You’ve always been one of his favorite students. You were smart, you were kind, respectful, but fuck, you were hot, too. He knew it was wrong, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care.

Not when you stared at him at like that. Not when you looked so perfect to ruin.

And when you came up to him after class, pleading for help and tutoring from him, well, he felt like it was all falling into his lap.

“Miss Y/N.” He spoke when you stood in front of his desk, small smile making its way onto his face. He ran a hand through his hair, subtly looking you up and down before leaning back in his chair. “What can I do for you?”

“Sir,” you nodded your head, giving him a polite smile as well. “I was wondering if you would help me with something… I’m not sure I quite understood what we were talking about today,” you spoke, pausing and looking at him.

“Go on.” He nodded, interest piquing by the second.

“Well, I was thinking, could you perhaps better explain the subject to me after school, or something like that? It would be very beneficial, I think, to hear it from you rather than a student.”

“You’re asking for tutoring?” He asked you with raised eyebrows.

“Yes, sir.” You nodded, and he thought for a moment. What better opportunity would he have?

“Alright. Sure.” He agreed, and you found yourself smirking to yourself as he began to write down his address on a piece of paper, before handing it to you. His next class of students began to fill in, and you took that as a cue to leave.

“Thank you very much, professor!” You spoke as you left, giving him a wave. He gave you a smile and small wave back, turning to his new class, clearing his throat. He couldn’t contain the smile on his face as he began to teach his next class.

Later, you pulled up to the address on the note. Your nerves were jumping every step you took closer to his house.

He could have invited you into his office, he could have invited you anywhere on campus, but, no. He invited you to his house. He knew what you wanted, and you knew what he wanted.

You bundled your hand up into a fist, raising it and rapping at the door quietly. It wasn’t long before he opened it, peeking out before opening it fully, inviting you in with a warm smile, cup of coffee in hand.

“Miss y/n.”

You gave him a smile back, taking off your shoes as you entered. He sat in his sofa, motioning for you to follow and do the same. You sat next to him, sitting up straight with your hands in your lap.

“So,” he leaned down to the table in front of him, putting his cup down and flipping the pages of a textbook. “Where would you like to start?” He asked you, turning to you.

You began to ramble on, about some subjects you could start with, about subjects you didn’t understand completely.

He listened, nodding as he flipped to the proper pages, and opened it to what you were talking about.

“You wanna go ahead and read that for me, sweetheart?”

The nickname caused your cheeks to warm up and your eyes to widen slightly. You blinked rapidly, before stammering out.

“U-uhm, yeah, yeah- sure.” You nodded dumbly, and he couldn’t help the small smirk that made its way onto his face.

“Just read the page.” He told you, you nodding and moving, grabbing the pages and reading them in your head before he let out a ‘tsk.’

You paused, looking at him with a quirked eyebrow.

“Out loud.”

You stared at him for a moment, before turning around, squirming where you sat when you felt the denim of his jeans rub against your bare thighs. The couch was small, so you thought nothing of it, at least, not until he slowly moved his hand to your leg, placing it on your knee as you spoke out loud.

You began to stutter through the words, feeling your cheeks heating up. It felt as if though every single touch you felt from him was electric.

“Uhm- this leads to the- to the…” you trailed off, breath hitching when you felt his hand trail further up, testing the waters until they reached the underneath of your skirt.

He looked back at you, watching your reaction as his hand paused at your panties, a small smile on his face.

Fuck it.

You leaned in closer to the man, book now completely forgotten as his lips were against yours. Everything that told you this was wrong, screaming at you that this wasn’t allowed, was completely erased from your brain.

You put your hands across his chest, his hands going to the back of your neck, pulling you closer. Your tongues danced together, the soft moans falling from his mouth sounding heavenly to you.

You both parted for a moment, catching your breath, both of you staring at each other.

He wordlessly stood up, and you followed him to his bedroom. The door was barely shut behind you before he threw you down onto the bed, you letting out a soft giggle when he crawled on top of you. He leaned down again, his lips hovering against yours as he murmured softly to you.

“You have no clue how long I’ve wanted to do this.” He told you, soft pants falling from his mouth.

You stared up at him, wide eyed, with a look that made him want to destroy you.

He was the one to take your shorts off, a small grin forming on his face at the sight of your cute lace pink panties. You could feel the heat going to your cheeks, embarrassment flooding you.

“These are cute.” He mumbled, tinge of amusement in his voice.

“Stop!” You whined out, him letting out a chuckle. He could see the way you subtly clenched your thighs, trying to get some sort of friction.

“So impatient, hmm?” He teased.

“Please, professor.” You spoke with a pout on your face.

His eyes widened now, swallowing thickly at the name. He darted his tongue out, licking his lips and another grin appearing on his face. He liked that.

He lowered himself down so that he was face to face with your glistening pussy, smile on his face as he ran his fingers through your folds.

His thick finger found your hole, looking up at you before pushing two of them in, causing you to throw your head back against the pillow, which caused him to grin to himself as he pushed his fingers further into your walls.

He curled them up, grin remaining on his face as he scissored them, and thrusted them in and out of you, feeling you clench down on his digits.

His thumb moved to press on your clit, pressing down on the delicate button, causing you to let out a whine. He swirled his thumb in a circle, all while still thrusting his fingers in and out of you.

“Professor-“

“Mhm…cum for me, sweetheart.” He told you, knowing what you were going to say before you could. He coaxed the first orgasm out of you, still circling his thumb on your clit as you rid out your high, your legs spasming as you came around his fingers.

He slowly removed his hands from your walls, smile on his face as he looked up at you, sticking his fingers in his mouth, swirling his tongue around the digits, sucking off the wetness that came from you.

You watched in awe, jaw slightly dropping at the sight in front of you.

He cracked a smile at your reaction, moving up to give you one more quick kiss on your lips before moving back.

He moved to unbutton and take off his pants, you watching him curiously. Fuck, he was built, you thought as your eyes shamelessly scanned his abs.

He now was only in his boxers, before eventually, he threw both of those off as well, discarding them in the room while you took your shirt off as well, arching your back to reach for the back of your bra and unclipping it.

While you were doing that, he moved to the side of his bed and began to rummage through his drawer, pulling out a bundle of rope.

“Sir-“ you began, but were cut off when he grabbed your wrists, putting them to the headboard, and began tying them together to his headboard expertly. He was quick and precise, tightening it around you. You looked up at him, confused, but he just smiled down at you.

He wasted no more time to slap the tip of his cock onto your folds, a gasp escaping your mouth as he began to slowly inch his length into your hole.

You wanted to touch him, to wrap your arms around his neck, but you couldn’t. He stared down at you, watching you struggle against the restraints with an amused expression on his face. He was enjoying this.

“Fuck, such a good girl.” He rasped out, his voice making your head spin.

The voices in your head, the ones that told you that this was wrong, suddenly disappeared as soon as you felt him bottom out into your cunt. His hand went to the headboard, holding it for stability as he dragged his cock out of you, before harshly thrusting back in.

Your mouth opened to form an ‘o’ shape as he snapped his hips against yours, a moan falling from your lips.

The groans that came from him and the cries coming from you reverberated in the room. With every snap of his hips, you grew needier. His hand that wasn’t on the headboard moved to your pussy, and began to rub on your clit, rubbing circles fastly.

“C’mon, cum for me, sweetheart. I know you can do it.”

That was all you needed, you letting out a louder cry as you came around his cock, this triggering his own orgasm. He let out a raspy groan, mumbling “shit,” to himself as he painted your walls.

He watched as his seed mixed with yours and it fell down to your legs, an idea popping into his head as he pulled out for a moment, before stuffing his cock back into your entrance, pushing the leaky cum back into you, smearing it all over your pussy with a proud smile on his face.

“What?” He asked as if he was innocent when you let out another whine at the feeling. He pulled out once more, looking down at you.

Your body was completely spent, your wrists aching and your clit puffy from the stimulation. He may have been older, but fuck, he knew what he was doing.

He looked back at the restraints on your wrist, moving over towards them, undoing them easily. You let out a sigh of relief, going to massage your wrists.

“You alright?” He asked you, posture straightening as he stood up, beginning to put his boxers on.

“Mhm.” You spoke with a dazed look in your eyes, and a soft smile on your face.

He let out a chuckle, and looked around for a moment, deciding whether or not he should even be doing this. He decided that he’d already crossed that line, and that at this point, it didn’t matter:

“I’m gonna go run a bath for you.” He told you, before leaving you in the room, you hearing the faucet in the bathroom run.

Your mind was racing with thoughts. You just fucked your professor. Your very hot professor who you’ve had a crush on for months. Holy shit. Was this even real? He just came in you. Maybe you should-

Your thoughts were interrupted when he picked you up bridal style up off of the bed, his touch surprisingly gentle as a contrast to his movements before.

You wrapped your arms around his neck as he lowered you down into the tub, the warm water underneath causing your body to calm down. You nestled deeper into the water, glancing at him.

He sat at the side of the tub, a bottle of body wash in his hands, and he looked at you, tilting his head slightly, silently asking if it was okay.

This was different. It felt so much more intimate. But you didn’t mind.

You gave him a small nod, and he stood up, moving to wash your shoulders, massaging them gently. before moving down to the rest of your body. His caresses were gentle and soft, as if you would break like glass if he did it any harder.

None of it was sexual, none of it had any lustful intentions. You found yourself smiling at him again, him giving you a soft smile back.

You had a thing for your teacher, and sure, maybe it was wrong, but you couldn’t find it in you to care.

[bluem1lls]

Hi! Could you do a fluff Se-mi one shot? Unfortunately I don’t really have any prompt to give you but I think a out of squid game AU would be pretty cool! Like it could be when they first met, or first date sm like that!

I would really appreciate it if you write it, but if not that’s absolutely fine! I hope you have an amazing day! <3

headcanons gf! se-mi

✦ synopsis: never let your annoying best friends to stop you from finding your girlfriend!

tw: a bit of nsfw

authors note: hiii im sorry for the no update, work is killing me but here's this! i hope u like it💓 tysm for the requests!

-> se-mi, who you've met because of a close friends hangout.

"would it be okay if i bring se-mi?" min su asked as i passed the joint to thanos.

"is she cute?" nam gyu asked.

"she's a lesbian" min-su answered with a chuckle.

"oh?" i said as i pay more attention to the conversation.

"she's probably not your type tho, you're so picky" min su said rolling his eyes as i scoffed.

-> se-mi, who was totally your type.

when you two met, you bonded immediately, laughing and smoking together as the other three were sitting on the couch staring.

"what about us man? when it's our turn?" nam-gyu said, watching as she said something that made you blush.

thanos and min su shook their head as they kept smoking.

"i bet i can drink more than you" she said as you laughed. "wanna bet?" she said with a smirk. "if i win, i get your number"

no need. two shots in and you were giving her your number no matter what.

-> se-mi, who texted you while you were passed out on nam gyu's bed as he was sprawled on the floor with thanos's arm around him.

you tried to find your phone, lowering the brightness as you grabbed it while your head throbbed.

pretty girl w the piercings: hi

pretty girl w the piercings: maybe its too soon but would you like to have dinner tonight? we can do something chill :)

-> se-mi, who has you waking up thanos and nam gyu with screams of happiness.

"who died?!" nam-gyu opened his eyes wide.

"min-su?! my boy?" thanos asks, alarmed

"se-mi texted me! she wants to hang out tonight! it's a date!" i said getting up the bed to quickly shower.

"this can't happen anymore bro. she needs to stop getting drunk and sleeping in your room" thanos says to nam gyu as he throws himself into his bed and covers himself with the blankets.

nam gyu blinks. two people already slept in his bed, none of those being him. he sighs as he goes into thanos's room to sleep some more.

"for fucks sakes" he mumbles.

-> se-mi, who's soon arriving to your house.

"i need you two idiots out of here tonight" you said, putting your earrings on and brushing your hair as they stared.

thanos winked as he grabbed his phone to call someone. "we're on our way" i could hear min-su over the phone screaming to thanos, alarmed, because he was on a family reunion. "we're your family too boy! be there in 20" he said, hanging up.

well. they're min-su's problem now.

-> se-mi, who stood there in all back, as she played with her lip piercing, smirking and looking up and down as you open the door.

"hi!"

"hey pretty" she said, as you moved aside, letting her in.

"we're just leaving" she got in as the guys got out, giving a quick head nod to her.

"get laid" thanos shouted from outside.

"she needs it" nam-gyu followed him.

of course you stood there all blushy as she chuckled.

you'll kill them later.

-> se-mi, who brought everything you told her you liked! a horror movie, your favorite snacks, diet coke and ice cream as dessert.

"it's this is okay? maybe i should've bought more things. now i'm nervous maybe it's time for a smoke break-" she rambles too much. you don't give her time to think as you cup her face and kiss her. her eyes widen in surprise but she quickly melts into it.

-> se-mi, who's quickly stopping the makeout sesh to turn on some 'cigarettes after sex' on the speaker.

-> se-mi, who starts hanging out more with the boys and talks a lot about you.

-like a lot. nam-gyu is tired. he has to see you at home and now hear about you??

-> se-mi, who loves chill dates with you, like staying at home and watching some movie.

-> se-mi, who has to get used to the guys because half of the dates probably include them bc they feel left out:(

its like you two are mothers going out with three kids. three very dumb kids (26 year old adults). but you love them and se-mi learns to love them too .. kind of. give her time.

-> se-mi, who not even two months in she's decoring your room with your favorite flowers and a sign that says 'would you let me be your girlfriend?' you kiss her until your lips go numb.

-> gf!se-mi who doesn't know how to keep her hands out of you. her hands on your hips, hugging you from behind, circles on your waist, underneath your shirt.

-> gf!se-mi who loves playing video games. she's SO happy when she finds out you don't actually like playing but you like watching. she buys all your favorite games and plays them all for you

"BABY, TURN RIGHT. I'VE WATCHED THIS 20 TIMES, GO RIGHT" you shout at her.

"do you wANNA PLAY?" she replies, getting exasperated trying to follow your indications.

you pout as you shook your head.

she loves this. wouldn't trade it for the world.

-> gf!se-mi who loves taking you shopping to the mall. clearly for the lingerie stores. probably ends up fingering you in there.

she buys anything you like, baby is poor but she tries SO hard for her girl:(

you're pointing at a plushie?? it's yours.

clothes u like? she knows your size, it's yours.

-> gf!se-mi who discovered your music tastes are so different that she can't believe she's listening to taylor swift and olivia rodrigo songs to learn them for you. she's incredibly down bad.

-> gf!se-mi who gets you a necklace with her initial

"for: baby

it's not because i own you, but because i really know you :)"

-> gf!se-mi who gets SO nervous when you wanna introduce her to ur parents. and she's so happy when they approved her.

-> gf!se-mi that is SOO smart, everytime she helps u study you're moaning.

-> gf!se-mi that's not studying for now, just working. but you are.

and when she sees you burned out? oh she's the first one to be there helping.

"baby, you've been studying for hours, let's take a break"

"i can't sem. my parents-"

"okay okay, let's go through the flashcards again and we'll take a nap, how does that sound?"

-> gf!se-mi that is there when you get a 87 and not a 100. and you're crying about what your parents are going to say while she caress your hair and kisses you.

"we'll start again in a bit if you want to, but for now let it out princess" she kisses your temple.

-> gf!se-mi who everyone stares when she takes you to campus. but she has no idea, she's just looking at you.

-> gf!se-mi who's a fuckgirl in recovery tho..

like the idea of cheating does not cross her mind. but sometimes she smiles. too much.

and maybe some girl is winking at her because god you have a HOT girlfriend.

and she just turns to you, smirking.

"did u see that babe? i haven't lost my charm ;)" she says as you scoff in disbelief. you two end up making out until her brain is too fuzzy to remember what she told you.

"just wanted her to see that you're mine" you say as you clean up any of your messed up lipstick.

her boxers are wet. sticky and wet.

and if someone you know is frequently flirting with her? next time they'll see her, she has three big bruised spots on her neck, and she's SO happy.

one time she had a little admirer at her job who went to see her like three times a week.

baby: she's here!!!!!!!!!!!

me: who???

me: wait.. stalker??

baby: mhm.

and when you leave her on seen, she frowns. she scans everything this girl is taking as she feels her phone vibrating. she checks her messages and oh! it's you!

two photos. one of you in her favorite red lingerie and the second one, you moving aside those pretty panties to send your bare pussy.

she's drooling. and her brain is pretty much broken.

"i-m-m sorry" she stutters to the girl in front of her, who frowns. "min-su cover for me! i'll stay tomorrow" se-mi screams at him and smiles at the girl who looks like her heart got crushed.

-> gf!se-mi who also gets jealous easily. match made in heaven!

give her two seconds before she's eyeing up and down with a cold stare to anyone who's talking to you. her hands grip your waist as they start to roam over your body, she leaves a wet neck kiss as she gets close to your ear.

"bathroom. right now. or you wanna show them you're only my whore? because i'll fuck you right here and i'll make them watch" she whispers on your ear while you're talking, making you shiver.

yeah forget the chat, it wasn't that interesting anyways.

-> gf!se-mi that spends every sundays with you

lazy days, laying in bed hugging and kissing eachother, picking two books out of your book shelf to read for a while. if it's raining?? movie, take out food and a nap.

she just wants to be with you, does not care about anything else.

-> gf!se-mi that if you're into romantic stuff, she's doing her best for her girl. sometimes she forgets tbh but there it is min-su to remind her!

se-mi: 😭 she's mad at me

min-su: it's flower day. according to tik tok, girl's wanna receive a yellow bouquet

se-mi: you're my second favorite person.

and she's at your door 30 minutes after you got mad with a yellow bouquet, smiling behind it.

she really tries.

-> gf!se-mi who knows how to draw so well, she actually draws a bouquet of ur favorite flowers to give u every month.

-> gf!se-mi who finds tik toks about kitties and sends them to you.

you open tik tok once again as you see a new video sent by your girlfriend. is a black cat licking a white cat with a pink bow

semisucks: das us:)

-> gf!se-mi who loves when you do skincare on her but she already has a pretty spotless face. although she uses hand soup to wash her face

-> gf!se-mi who never stopped flirting with you, she has to keep her girl

" you look so good tonight, you're lucky i have a wife or ill be taking you to bed real fast" she says winking as you roll your eyes.

-> gf!se-mi that after two years of dating, wants to move with you.

"you didnt ask for our consent" thanos says, shooking his head no as you both tell them the news.

"you steal our best friend and now you want her to move? that's not happening" nam gyu agrees with him.

you stare at the three of them who are fighting about you like little kids.

"well, i guess its time to bring the second choice" i say to se-mi as she places her head on the table as she mumbles 'fuck'

"she moves here" i say, staring at those two as they stare at eachother.

"fine. but no moaning" thanos says as nam gyu nods.

-> gf!se-mi who hates her birthday, except this year, when you throw her a mini surprise party with nam-gyu, thanos and min-su.

-> gf!se-mi who can't cook... please don't make her.

-> gf!se-mi who protects you and puts you on top of anything.

you're her girl after all.

nsfw hc!

-> gf!se-mi who has an obsession with your tits, when youre riding her? shes having a blast seeing your tits bounce

-> gf!se-mi who fucks u in public places. 100%

-> gf!se-mi who has a broken brain when she sees you with a new lingerie set.

-> gf!se-mi who has a black strap. and god she knows how to use it

-> gf!se-mi who didn't do it right if you're not crying and trembling by the end of the night.

-> gf!se-mi who loves quickies. everytime you two are about to go out you're suddenly 15 minutes late because you just looked so cute in that oufit, that she had to eat you out.

-> gf!se-mi who quiets her whimpers everytime you're eating her out while she's playing with the guys.

"are you okay? focus dip shit" nam-gyu says to her.

she's on her chair, completely flustered and out of breath, biting her lips while you're swirling around her clit.

"i'm- i'm fine" she sttuters as she quickly mutters the mic, her hand grabs your hair. "right there princess"

-> gf!se-mi who loves to hear you while she fucks you. if you're not screaming she's not happy.

-> gf!se-mi that gets extremely frustrated when you tease her in public.

it's okay, she'll make you her slut when you're back home<3

[writingroom21]

Stepbro Rafe talking you through it

A/N: Finally feeling better and was so excited when I saw this! Got me in the writing mood so fast

“Rafe.” A moan slips past your lips. His eyes flick up to look at you. The sun casting a glow behind you causes him to squint his eyes from the intensity. He hums around your clit as he keeps sucking it. 

Today was a hot day in Outer Banks and Rafe thought it was a good idea to take out the boat. The idea was posed as a bonding activity for the two of you since your mom and his dad keep hounding you. They think that since the two of you are step-siblings that you need to get along. Well this probably isn’t how they imagined it but it was one hell of a way to do it.

The moment the boat was far enough that no one could see, he was on you. “They want us to get along. I think I got the perfect thing for us to do.” Your shorts were tossed aside and your bikini bottoms were pushed to the side. Even though you were reluctant, your thighs spread open for him. His tongue teased your folds before he dived in like a man starved. “Fuck baby, taste like heaven.” You let out a moan at his words, moving your hips. The friction from his tongue as you glide your hips to match his pace.

“If I had a last meal it would be this pretty pussy. Look at how she drools for me.” Rafe takes a moment to stare at your folds, catching the way you clench around nothing. His right hand moves up the inside of your thigh. Placing his thumb on your clit, he moves in soft circles. The barely there touch short circuits your brain. All of the worries of someone catching you dying down in the back of your brain. “Rafe, I.”

When your words are cut off with a moan Rafe laughs. He audibly laughs in your face as you can’t help but to moan. “It’s okay princess. Feels good right?” You can hear the ruffling of his pants as he pulls them down. Using his left hand he lazily jerks himself off as he fingers you. “Mmmm.” Light kisses are placed on your lower abdomen trailing all the way down to your clit again. The combination of his fingers and lips could be lethal.

“I can feel you squeezing the shit out of me.” He hissed as he pulled his fingers out again. Kneeling between your legs he replaces his fingers with his cock. Your walls flutter around him violently as he pushes his way in. Resting his forehead on your shoulder he takes a deep breath in trying not to cum. His thumb strokes your clit, building up the orgasim that keeps refusing to happen. “Just relax princess, let me take care of you.”

Slowly he thrusts into you. It’s a steady slow pace so you can feel every inch of him. The boat rocks with each movement. The sound of water splashing along the sides fills your ears as a tingle forms in your lower abdomen. “That’s it.” Rafe murmurs along your skin. His teeth sink into your skin as he holds back his moans. He wants to hear you, feel you, know that he’s the one who broke you. “Feel so fucking good. Your pussy keeps pulling me back in.” A loud moan comes from you.

A smile spreads across his face and he moves into your view so you can see. Holding your cheeks, he forces you to look at him. “Eyes on me princess. You like it when I use you right?” He uses his grip to nod your head as you moan. “I know you do. Like knowing that your stepbrother is the only one who could fuck you properly.” You clench hard around but still you teeter on the edge of an orgasim.

“I wonder what your mom would say seeing how much of a whore you are. Practically begging me to knock you up.” Your whole body goes numb as your orgasim racks through you. Moans keep falling from your lips as the pleasure feels never ending. “There you go. Did such a good job for me.” You wrap your arms around him as he keeps thrusting into you. Each thrust prolongs your orgasim until you are jelly in his arms.

“That’s it, relax. I got you.” His hand pushes some hair away from your face and he places a kiss on your forehead. “Fuck you feel so good. I’m about to cum.” A few more thrust and he’s pulling out. Ropes of his cum covers your skin and he massages it in. “Don’t worry next time, I’ll fill you up.” A finger soaked in cum makes its way back inside you. A small part of him is satisfied that he got you to break and now there’s a piece of him left behind.

Taglist : @rafedaddy01 @rrafeswhore @10ava01 @selfcontollover07 @akobx @starkeysbebe

[greengoblinswifey]

Lenses and Lust—Fratboy!Nicholas Chavez x Fem!Reader

summary— Nicholas despises his new glasses, he sees them as an inconvenience and doesn’t like how he looks them on. You think the opposite and reassure him that he’s just as irresistible with them on by riding him and sitting on his face and he finds himself seeing things differently. based on this request.

warnings— insecurity, sub!nicholas, praise kink, hair pulling, face sitting/oral, unprotected sex, creampie, fluff, L bombs.

Nicholas sat at the edge of his bed, running a hand through his messy hair as he reluctantly put on his glasses. He muttered under his breath, “I hate these stupid things.”

You, lying comfortably on your side, propped up on one elbow, couldn’t resist staring at him. His jawline was sharp, his shoulders broad, and those glasses? They did something to you. You didn’t understand why he hated them so much when they made him look like a hot professor who belonged in some forbidden fantasy.

“Y’know,” you started, “you look fine as fuck with those on.”

Nicholas shot you a skeptical look, adjusting the glasses on his nose. “Yeah, right. I look like a damn nerd.”

You sat up, crawling across the bed until you were right in front of him. Reaching out, you cupped his face and tilted it so he was looking directly at you. “A nerd? Baby, you look like the sexiest man alive, and I’m not even exaggerating.”

He raised an eyebrow, the corner of his mouth forming into a small smirk. “You’re just saying that because you’re my girlfriend.”

“I’m saying it because it’s true,” you said, straddling his lap without hesitation. You ran your fingers through his hair, tugging gently just to see that flicker of fire in his eyes. “Do you know how hard it is to focus when you’re walking around looking this good? And now, with the glasses? Nick, it’s not even fair.”

“You’re playing,” he said, though his hands instinctively found your waist, pulling you closer.

“Am I?” You leaned in, your lips brushing his ear as you whispered, “Then why am I literally begging you to fuck me with them on?”

He groaned, his head falling back slightly. “You’re something else,” he murmured, his grip tightening on your hips.

“And you love me,” you teased, pressing a kiss to his jawline.

He tilted his head back up, looking at you through the frames. “You’re seriously turned on by these?”

“Deadass,” you replied, tugging at his t-shirt to get it off him. “You could wear them every day, you should, and I’d still climb you like a tree.”

Nicholas chuckled, the sound deep and raspy as he helped you pull his shirt off. “You’re lucky you’re beautiful.”

“I know,” you retorted, grinding your hips against him. His hands slid down to your ass, squeezing, as he watched you with those glasses perched perfectly on his face.

He leaned in close, his voice dropping to a teasing tone. “If I keep them on, you better make it worth my while.”

“Oh, I will,” you promised, crashing your lips against his. His glasses pressed against your face, and you didn’t care one bit.

Nicholas didn’t hold back after that. His hands roamed over your body, his lips leaving trails of kisses along your neck, and all the while, his glasses stayed on. You pulled him in for another kiss, his hands resting firmly on your hips as you pressed closer to him. His lips moved against yours with a mix of tenderness and hunger, and the way his hands gripped you sent shivers down your spine.

You pulled back slightly, your breath shaky. “How about I ride your face, baby?” you whispered.

Nicholas’ face turned a deep shade of red, and he blinked at you from behind his glasses, caught off guard. “W-wait, like t-this?” he stammered, gesturing between you and himself.

“Yes, like this,” you teased, your lips curving into a smile. “You look so hot like this. I need you.”

His throat bobbed as he swallowed hard, but his hands moved to the hem of your shirt, tugging it up as his confidence grew.

You chuckled softly, lifting your arms so he could pull your top off. He helped you out of the rest of your clothes, his hands skimming over your bare skin as he muttered, “Seeing you naked never gets old.” His gaze roamed over you, his glasses slightly slipping down his nose as he admired you.

“Lie back,” you instructed softly.

Nicholas didn’t hesitate, leaning back onto the bed, his head resting against the pillows. His glasses caught the light, and the sight of him looking up at you made your heart race.

You climbed over him, positioning yourself above his face. He reached up, steadying you with his hands on your thighs. His voice was barely a whisper. “You’re so beautiful and so wet,” he said, his breath warm against your skin.

Before you could respond, he leaned forward and pulled you flat onto his mouth, his lips met your pussy, and all coherent thought disappeared. He was thorough, his tongue working with a precision that had you gripping the headboard for support.

“Nick,” you gasped, your voice breaking as he hummed in response, the vibrations sending shocks through your body. His hands gripped your thighs tighter, holding you in place as he devoured you like you were the only thing that could satisfy his primal hunger.

“You taste so good,” he murmured against you between breaths, his voice deep.

Your fingers threaded through his hair, tugging gently as you whimpered. “You’re so good at this—I can’t.”

“Don’t hold back,” he said, his voice muffled. His words were a command, and the lust in his gaze through the slightly fogged lenses of his glasses made you lose whatever restraint you had left.

Your pussy throbbed and you squirted into his mouth, trembling as he held you steady, continuing lapping at the liquid that flowed from you until you couldn’t take any more. Finally, you lifted yourself up, your breaths coming in shallow gasps.

Nicholas lay there, glasses a bit askew and lips glistening, looking thoroughly pleased with himself. “You’re the most amazing girlfriend anyone could ever dream of,” he said, his voice low and shaky.

He was still catching his breath when you leaned over him, your fingers brushing back the soft strands of his hair. He had slipped out of his shorts, leaving him in just his boxers, and his back was pressed against the headboard. His glasses rested slightly crooked on his nose, and he looked at you with satisfaction.

You straddled his lap, smoothing your hands over his chest, feeling the way it rose and fell under your touch. “You’re so handsome, sweetheart,” you murmured.

His lips quirked into a shy smile, and he let out a nervous laugh. “I don’t know about that with these on.”

You tilted his chin so he was looking directly at you, your thumb brushing across his jaw. “You are, Nick. I need you to see yourself the way I see you. You're perfect,” you whispered.

His hands found your waist, steadying you as you shifted closer. “You’re going to kill me with all these compliments,” he said, his heart fluttering.

You leaned in, your lips grazing his ear as you whispered, “Baby, I need you again. I need to ride you.”

He froze for a moment, his hands tightening on your hips. “You’re serious?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.

You pulled back to look into his eyes, nodding. “I’ve never been more serious.”

With his consent clear, you slipped his boxers off, and he helped you position yourself over his hard cock. His breath hitched as you sank down onto him slowly, and the way he filled you made your head spin.

“God, you’re so big, you feel so good,” you breathed, your hands resting on his shoulders as you began to ride him.

Nicholas gripped your waist, his gaze locked on you as if you were the only thing in the world. “You’re perfect,” he murmured, his voice trembling. “I love you.”

You leaned forward, rolling your hips and cupping his face as you whispered, “I love you too, Nick.”

His lips captured yours in a heated kiss, the kind that said more than words ever could. The room was filled with the sound of skin slapping, your moans, and the quiet praises you exchanged. You could practically feel him in your guts as you switched from grinding to bouncing, your tits moving in his face as you did. Each time you lifted yourself, you felt him drag across your walls, every vein memorizing your tight pussy.

“You’re doing so well,” he moaned, his head tipping back against the headboard. “You feel incredible.”

“And you,” you gasped, your fingers threading through his hair and tugging again as you bounced on his dick, “are everything I’ve ever wanted.”

The tension built between you, the pace quickening as your bodies moved in sync. You rode him like you were proving a point. And you were. You were showing him just how attractive he was—just how attracted you were to him, glasses or not—and even more so with them on. You stared into his eyes through the frames, your jaw agape and his face contorted in pleasure as your pussy squeezed around him tightly.

His eyes darted from your face, to your tits, to your pussy moving up and down gripping his cock.

“Oh fuck, you’re riding me so good. Fucking gripping me like you don’t want to let go. I need to cum. Please let me cum,” he whined.

“You’ve been such a good boy, so handsome, everything I could ever ask for. Cum with me sweetheart, cum inside me,” you murmured.

Pressing your forehead against his, you stared at his face as you felt his cock throb inside you. Together, moaning each other’s names, you came, your bodies convulsing. Your fingers dug into his back, feeling his warm cum fill you up and you bit back a loud moan as you creamed all over his cock.

“Nick,” you whispered, your forehead resting against his as you both caught your breath.

“You’re amazing baby, utterly amazing,” he whispered back, his voice shaky.

When the high subsided, he gently pulled you into his arms, lying back against the pillows as he held you close. His fingers traced idle patterns along your spine. “I just want to hold you now,” he said softly, pressing a kiss to your temple.

You nuzzled closer, feeling the rhythm of his heartbeat beneath your cheek. “I’ll never complain about that,” you murmured, wrapping your arm around him.

After a moment, he broke the silence. “Thank you,” he said, his voice hesitant.

“For what?”

“For all of this. For being patient with me. I was a little insecure about the glasses and everything. I thought they’d make me look—”

“Stop,” you interrupted, brushing your thumb over his cheek. “You have no idea how hot you look in them. I don’t ever want to hear you putting yourself down again, okay? You’re everything I’ve ever wanted.”

His lips curved into a small smile, and he kissed your forehead. “You really mean that?”

“Every word,” you said firmly, brushing your fingers through his hair again. “I love you Nicholas. Don’t forget that.”

He chuckled, pulling you tighter against him. “How could I ever forget? I love you more.”

“Glasses Nicholas is undefeated.”

The two of you stayed like that, wrapped up in each other, nothing else mattered.

︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿

Tags: @blackynsupremacy @hoffmansgirl @nicholaschavezslut69

[fangirlwithlou]

Baby sorry for like million reblogs haha

You looked so fragile, yet incredibly ethereal and soft and he couldn’t help but stare. It was impossible not to stare at something, someone that beautiful. To grow up that beautiful — he wondered what that was like as he sat there ogling at you. He pondered if he should let himself go there with you, if he could let himself feel the rush and the high of serotonin and dopamine that he clinically knew would be released if he was to allow himself to love again. Was he selfish for wanting to be happy? Was he chaos on two feet? Was he damnation on earth the way that he had convinced himself he was? What would become of you, if you were to love him? Would you wind up just like her? - like what is this babe!! If she is half as beautiful as the way you write she most be the most amazing girl in this universe ❣️ and rafes hurt in this, yes you deserve happiness, you both do 🥹

You questioned him, confused. Did he go through this, physically? Did this sweet, sweet man hurt the same way that you had? - sweet sweet man yes indeed. Not like she thinks but omg yes must be so hard seeing it again 😭 but they are destinet to be together I know it

“Don’t worry, he’ll get you better and forget you ever existed. He won’t give any of us nurses the time of day. Don’t get your hopes up. Besides – look at you.”  - where is this bitch bedside manner? Just because he wount give you the time bc of your ugly personality 😌

“You know, maybe Rafe hasn’t given you the time of day because your personality fucking sucks, just a thought.” - hahaha we are one and the same she and I (maybe this means I will get my rafe please, hopelessly single here)

“Can’t do it anymore, can’t keep getting fixed. I’m not a stuffed animal that you can just keep sewing back up until all the stuffing has fallen out.” - aww the analogy I am sobbing poor girl 😭 that fucking bitch did not just do that to she should be fired and they should take her nursing license.

He whispers, continuing to rub soothing circles into your hair, letting you cuddle deeper into him and for the first time Rafe had felt warmth in someone that wasn’t Molly. He had felt warmth and goodness and it wasn’t from her and it simply scared him half to death - aghhh them omg I love them I need them, they are everything.

That was a lot baby, but as always thank you for your service, I love you and your mind and soul, you are amazing ❤️❤️

blue eyes + bruises - part five

✯ pairing:

doctor!rafe cameron x fem!reader

✯ summary:

a tragic car accident looks like it'll be the end for you, but dr. cameron is here to make sure that doesn't happen.

✯ warnings:

mature themes, mentions of anxiety, nostalgia, and fear, car accident, death of a spouse (not rafe or y/n), major surgery, injuries, hurt/comfort, angst, fluff, etc.

✯ a/n:

nothing!! please don't engage if you have a hard time with any of these topics <3 this was origianlly posted on my old blog @/illicitfixations, @/lovelornanonymity back in 2021/2022 and i have rewritten + reshared it here :) the next chapter i spent literally so much time on and i can't wait to share it!!!!

—

Running. Rafe had always been inherently good at running. It was noticed for the first time in middle school by the track and field coach when he outran a bully. The talent was nurtured and he went on to be a track star in high school and college. It was a good skill for a surgeon to have in the midst of an emergency, the ability to run with dexterity and endurance and speed. At least that’s what Molly had convinced him of so she could ogle at his muscular thighs and chest at every track meet. God, did he miss her. The one thing he never thought he would have to run to is his girl, his wife, his molly, as she was wheeled into the emergency room. The words of the surgeon on her case played over and over in Rafe’s head – no matter where he was or what he was doing – the flashback of that night, of those words in that setting – about his wife – it was all too much, no matter how long she had been gone. 

“Rafe, I’m so sorry. We did everything we could.” 

Dr. Charles Richardson looked his colleague, his friend, in the eye with a somber gaze. It felt to Rafe like the look of someone after they had spent an entire afternoon reading Edgar Allen Poe. The look in Charles’ eye made him angry. It wasn’t because of the circumstances, it was because he knew what the look meant – it meant his wife was gone. It meant Charles was looking at him the way he looks at a patient’s family and Rafe, while he was her family, he knew the speech, he knew the words, he knew this world. He knew it was all bullshit.

“Don’t bullshit me, Charles. If my wife is dead, tell me she’s dead.”  

He growled. 

“I’m sorry, Rafe.” 

“You keep saying you’re sorry – say the fucking words. I need to hear you say the words. Not ‘I did everything I could’, not ‘I'm so sorry.’ You say the fucking words you coward.” 

“She’s gone, buddy. She’s gone.” 

—

Rafe was jolted out of his thoughts, out of the memory he had been encapsulated in for the last two years as you stirred awake. He sat there watching you, the steady rise and fall of your chest doing little to comfort him, though he knew it meant you were alive. His eyes moved from your sweet face to your leg that he had previously operated on, a black hinged brace lined it where it sat elevated against three pillows in an attempt to keep the swelling minimal. You looked so fragile, yet incredibly ethereal and soft and he couldn’t help but stare. It was impossible not to stare at something, someone that beautiful. To grow up that beautiful — he wondered what that was like as he sat there ogling at you. He pondered if he should let himself go there with you, if he could let himself feel the rush and the high of serotonin and dopamine that he clinically knew would be released if he was to allow himself to love again. Was he selfish for wanting to be happy? Was he chaos on two feet? Was he damnation on earth the way that he had convinced himself he was? What would become of you, if you were to love him? Would you wind up just like her? 

He forced his overactive brain to stop spinning once he noticed your eyes were open and he brushed his fingers against your forehead. 

“Hey, sweet girl. Welcome back.” 

He cooed, his fingers running up and down the bridge of your nose and across your eyebrows in the shape of a “T”. 

“Hi.” 

You croaked out, throat dry and begging for a source of water. Rafe obliged, rising to his feet as his brain recognized your desperation, hearing the desert within your windpipe and bringing the water up to your lips with a straw. 

“Suck slowly, okay?” 

He instructed, running his fingers through your hair slowly and you followed his directions. 

“How’s the pain?” 

He questioned with a softness that you were convinced was less about him being a good doctor and more about him just being who he was – just being a good person. 

“Like a five maybe. You’re still here?” 

You lied, not wanting to see the life leave his blue eyes when you told him otherwise. 

“That’s good. Yeah, I just wanted to sit with you for a while. Is that okay?” 

He smiled softly, questioning you.

“Of course it is. Can I go back to sleep? I mean, will you be here when I wake up if I do?” 

You questioned, a curiosity looming in your features, unsure why you would’ve stayed up if it meant more time with him.

“Absolutely, sweet girl. I’ll always be here.” 

He smiled, sitting next to you, rubbing soothing circles into the top of your head as you drifted off to sleep. You weren’t sure what it was, but you knew that he was telling the truth, that somehow he’d always be around.

—

You looked up at Rafe as he moved around you, fluffing the pillows behind your head, you sat at an incline in the bed again, trying desperately to reach the tv remote that sat on the table beside you. He had been talking – asking you questions about your day, as if you had done anything except lay here, again. But, all you could think about is the fact that your favorite movie was coming on tv in less than thirty minutes and it was a simple pleasure you were going to indulge yourself in. You shut your eyes tight, squeezing them against your eyelashes with the force of a thousand suns. Rafe must’ve noticed the pained expression on your face because before you could even ride out the wave of discomfort, he had the remote in his hands and he was kneeling in front of you, squatting on the balls of his feet.

“Hey, sweet girl, can you look at me?” 

He asked kindly and when the torment had subsided enough you blinked your eyes open, his piercing blue ones staring back into yours. 

“What is it, from 1-10? and don’t bullshit me this time.” 

His voice was soft but stern and you knew he meant business. 

“It’s a nine.” 

You said, grunting exasperatedly, frustrated and tired and sick – of – this. 

“Shit – sweetheart you can’t let it get that bad before you tell me and why are you putting yourself in more pain by reaching for this? You could’ve asked me, I’m right here.” 

He blurted out his questions in a brash way, waving the remote control in the air.

“My favorite movie is coming on, I just –, sorry, I’m just –” 

A whimper escaped your lips as you stuttered and Rafe moved toward you again, bringing your chin in between his thumb and pointer finger, tilting your head up towards him as he took in the tears that lined your eyes. His heart broke at the sight. 

“Hey – I know, sweetheart. You don’t have to be sorry, I know you’re frustrated.” 

“How do you know how I feel?” 

You questioned him with a hint of attitude. In your mind, it didn’t matter how many people he had operated on with your same injuries, he hadn’t lived it and because of that fact, he didn’t understand. 

“Let me guess, you’re frustrated, annoyed, tired, sad and really wanting a shower?” 

He asked you with a light chuckle, smiling the Rafe Cameron smile as you looked up at him with bewildered eyes. 

“How could you possibly know any of that?” 

You questioned him, confused. Did he go through this, physically? Did this sweet, sweet man hurt the same way that you had?

“Because I’ve been where you are.” 

He stated very matter-of-factly and you were confused.

“You cracked your bones in a million places, too?” 

Had he been through this, too?

“No, but I’ve been in a situation that was eerily similar.” 

You were silent at his declaration, wondering what situation he was referring to. 

“I can’t do much for you about a shower, it’s only been three days since your surgery and with you in this much pain, I don’t want you up and moving. But I can have Jenni give you a sponge bath. Would you be up for that?” 

“Yes, please. That would – be amazing.” 

He nodded and gave you the Rafe Cameron smile again, leaning in and placing a kiss on your forehead. Jenni and another nurse stepped into the room with everything they needed, setting up a bucket of water, some hypoallergenic soap and a sponge on the rolling table that each hospital room came with. Once they had everything set up, Rafe stepped out, being the gentleman he was, he wanted you to have privacy and he definitely didn’t want the first time he saw you naked to be in a hospital bed. 

“He’s quite dreamy, isn’t he?” 

A nurse that stood beside Jenni spoke into the air and your breath faltered. Were you that obvious? If this blonde bimbo picked up it – he probably did too. How fucking embarassing. Rafe had left the room only moments ago with a promise to come check on you shortly, but you so desperately wished he would save you from this woman as she stood in front of you preparing to strip you bare and see the most intimate parts of you, though it felt like she already had. 

“He’s very nice to me.” 

You stated, nodding with a soft smile though your tone was a bit curt. Jenni’s pager went off, signaling another emergency in the hall. 

“Shit – I'll be right back.” 

She muttered, running out of the room in a hurried fashion. The other nurse, who’s name you couldn’t bring yourself to remember, looked at the door as Jenni exited through the threshold – you were sure your recollection, or lack thereof, had more to do with the meds and less to do with her and the shitty vibe she gave off. She worked diligently, pulling down the hospital gown, noting the stitches that lined your chest as she drug the sponge gently over your soft skin. 

“Don’t worry, he’ll get you better and forget you ever existed. He won’t give any of us nurses the time of day. Don’t get your hopes up. Besides – look at you.” 

She replied, rolling her eyes as the words left her mouth. ‘What a bitter bitch’, you thought. You bit your tongue for only a moment before deciding to fully send it – there was nothing she could do to you – you were already bedridden, recovering from surgery and would be for the next few months – there was nothing she could do to you. 

“You know, maybe Rafe hasn’t given you the time of day because your personality fucking sucks, just a thought.” 

You spoke nonchalantly and before she could respond, she laid down the sponge she was using to bathe you with on top of your chest, took off her gloves and dug her long, manicured finger into the incision site Rafe had just stitched up on your hip. Your yelp was so loud Rafe heard it from the hallway, where he stood at the nurse’s station, finishing off your surgical notes. Suddenly, the hammering in his chest overtook him and he rushed into your room to see if you were experiencing post-operative pain or if something else was wrong. What he never expected to see was a nurse, finger deep into a surgical incision and you – your sweet face with tears cascading down it as your eyes pleaded for him. 

“What the fuck are you doing to her?!” 

He growled, rushing to your side, pushing her to the side and grabbing gauze off the table next to your bed, immediately holding it to your hip to stop the bleeding. 

“I know, baby – I know it hurts. I’m sorry, I’m gonna fix it, okay?” 

He pulled the gauze away from your hip and Jenni rushed into the room, taking in the sight of your stitches that were fresh and clean and showing signs of healing only minutes ago and were now torn and bloody and frayed like the pages of an old book. 

“What the fuck happened, Rafe?” 

Jenni all but squealed, rummaging through drawers searching for more gauze and a suture kit. 

“F-f-fingers –” 

You choked out, crocodile tears rolling down your bright pink cheeks as your fists clenched the sheets beside you. 

“Sweet girl, we’re gonna fix it, okay?” 

“No, R-rafe!” 

“What do you mean, no, sweetheart? Talk to me.” 

“Can’t do it anymore, can’t keep getting fixed. I’m not a stuffed animal that you can just keep sewing back up until all the stuffing has fallen out.” 

He cooed, brushing the hair away from your forehead. 

“I know, baby – I know you’re tired. But, if we don’t fix it you’ll get an infection and you’ll get sick okay? We have to fix it, sweet girl.” 

You reluctantly nodded, letting him work, continuing to wail as each stitch was placed into your hip again, the skin irritated and sore and only adding to the discomfort that raked through your entire body. It was almost like Rafe knew when your breaths picked up and the weight of your new reality had fallen on your chest because he started asking questions – questions that you hadn’t answered – questions that no one had bothered to ask you in years. 

“So, what did you do before – I mean, I can only assume you don’t frequent hospitals very often? Unless you’re one of those crazy people. Are you one of those crazy people?” 

You threw your hand up to your mouth and let out a giggle. 

“You’re cute when you ramble, Rafe.” 

His lips turned up into a smirk. Your pain filled haze had you simply not caring about flirting with the man in front of you.

“Oh, so you think I’m cute?” 

He questioned, eyebrows furrowed, laughing as he checked the fluids that hung behind your bed. Your face was red, realizing what you had previously said to him once his words had reached your ears. You wished the bed you laid in would swallow you whole, scared to look this beautiful man in the eye and face rejection. There’s no way the feeling is reciprocated. 

“I mean, yeah. You’re an attractive guy, you’ve gotta know that.”

You stuttered out awkwardly and he simply giggled at the way you were shrinking into yourself, embarrassed at the compliment you had given him.

“Sweetheart, don’t be embarrassed. It’s okay, I’m flattered.” 

He smiled – the Rafe Cameron smile – rubbing circles into your hand as you took in the words that left his lips. 

He’s flattered. That’s what you say when you’re trying to let someone down easily. He doesn’t reciprocate and how could he? Just look at you. 

The assault on your heart at the mercy of your brain was interrupted quickly by Rafe’s voice again. 

“So, what did you do before? For work, I mean. You never answered my question.” 

“Okay, nosey. I’m – well – I was a high school English teacher.” 

You replied, with a sad smile. 

“What made you want to teach?” 

He asked, interested in everything that involved you.

“My younger sister, Ella has special needs and she wasn’t always treated fairly in the classroom; so I just wanted to make sure no child ever experienced that again.” 

“You know what that tells me?” 

He asked, a sly smile dancing across his face.

“What?” 

You wondered out loud.

“It tells me that you’re sweet and a good person and that you could’ve never deserved for this to happen.” 

“Thank you, Rafe –” 

He looked at you as tears fell down your face.

“Sweetheart, what can I do?” 

You didn’t answer him and your breaths only seem to quicken by the second and before Rafe could even think, he had kicked off his shoes and climbed in the bed with you, wrapping his arms around you tightly, one hand draping across your waist and one around the back of your head, pooling your hair in his hands. 

“Shh. It’s okay, baby. I’m so sorry.” 

He cooed. 

“I-I’m never gonna b-be the same am I? I-I’ll n-never b-be able to teach again.” 

You whimpered, crying into his chest. 

“Hey, sweet girl, don’t say that. I’m gonna do everything in my power to make sure you teach again, okay? I won’t let anyone take that away from you, ever.” 

His voice was soft and tender, afraid the wrong octave might rip you in half and you’d cease to exist right then and there. 

“Do you understand? I won’t let that happen.” 

This time he spoke with more force and you nodded your head reluctantly, unsure if you really believed him or not. 

“Tell me something to make me forget, Rafe – What made you want to become a doctor?” 

You questioned and he was uncomfortable, but the pleading look in your eyes made him answer anyway.

“It’s not a story full of glory, sweetheart. How about I tell you a better one, huh? How’s that sound?” 

He questioned, his hands working against your scalp like his life depended on it. 

“That sounds good.” 

You replied, somberly, wondering what kind of hurt this beautiful, sweet human being had experienced to make him so closed off about his own life. 

“Well – once upon a time, there was this doctor and he was a real asshole until this pretty girl walked into the hospital he worked at.” 

“What did she look like?” 

You questioned with curiosity-stricken features. He smiled at you, how he was the only one who got to see you like this. He couldn’t help but feel honored. 

“I think she looked a lot like you, sweetheart.” 

Your breath is caught in your throat at the fact that those words were coming from him. His hand motions continue against your scalp as you listen to his words, the euphoria that’s felt from the action is something you aren’t sure you’ve ever felt in your entire life. 

“I’m glad I found you, Rafe.” 

You mutter sleepily, listening to him continue the details of the stranger's beauty, who in his words, looked similar to you, before you promptly fell asleep.

“And I’m glad I found you, angel.” 

He whispers, continuing to rub soothing circles into your hair, letting you cuddle deeper into him and for the first time Rafe had felt warmth in someone that wasn’t Molly. He had felt warmth and goodness and it wasn’t from her and it simply scared him half to death. 

—

taglist:

as always, if you'd like to be added to or removed from the taglist, please shoot me an ask or comment on this post so i can keep track <3

@maybankslover @inthelibrarybtw @luvrcndy @silkylovey @yagirlwrites @obxbabygirl @rafeecameronsbitch @klutzy-kay24 @roseczbalt @akobx @allsmilesreally7 @wtfdudesblog @urdreamgirl12 @hockeybabe87 @sereneera @annaconscience @pogueprincesa @bibissparkles @obxbigsis

[kouzih]

Pretty boy.

Nam-gyu ( Player 124 ) x male!reader .ᐟ

warnings : has smut-ish parts, angst(?) insecure male!reader, mlm, drug/alcohol use and more stuff..

tags,, @gongyoosgf @cybrasigilism @paulilvsremus

word count: 9.1k !!

( 1/24 WHICH MEANS HAPPY NAM-GYU DAY Y'ALL!!! AAA AAA AAA sorry for the long waiting!! i wanted to make this one a bit longer than my other fics..and yeah!! hope you guys enjoy it 🫶 i'm sorry it's kinda fucked up..no proofread tho!! )

ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ As you make your way home from the hospital, you look at the bags in your hand again. You were doomed to these medicines to keep your body going. You've always hated this and it's been one of the barriers preventing you from accepting yourself..as a man. A man should be strong, masculine and not dependent on anyone else. Nothing else. With an involuntary sigh, you continued on your way. The bus you were supposed to get on passed you, and although it stopped at the bus stop, you didn't quicken your steps and try to catch the bus. You weren't even upset about missing it, the cold air hitting your face made you feel more alive. The ground was wet from the recent rain, and you arrived at the stop listening to the sounds of your boots hitting the water. You reach into your coat pocket and grab your phone to check the time. Your breath makes your phone screen fog up.

Your friend's text message catches your attention and you call her to reply, knowing that she won't see your message.

After waiting a few seconds, she answers the phone and greets you. "Heyy, what's up?" "Hey. You know, the usual stuff..shitty medicines and..all.." You say the last part in a whisper, lowering your voice when you see someone else approaching your stop. "Ohhhh, hospital shit again? Man, hoe can you deal with those everyday?" "Come again?" You hear a buzzing sound from your phone and realize that she has put it on the desk and turned on speakerphone. "I'm sayingggg, you take those tasteless medicines everyday, give tests and stuff and yet..you don't heal. Like, let's be real,," Even though you knew she didn't mean what she said, you couldn't help but sigh because she was telling the truth. "Mhm." After a hum of agreement for her to continue, you glance at the other person next to you, another face you hadn’t seen before. He had one hand in his pocket as he scrolled through his phone, leaning his face on the railing of the bus stop. You couldn't really hear what your friend was saying, her voice kept breaking because she was busy with something in the back and the stranger next to you had drawn your unnecessary attention.

The stranger tilted his head to the side, letting his hair fall over his face. Using his hand in his pocket to fix his hair, then started recording a voice message. "Yeah, yeah I'll take my bus in uh.." His eyes meet yours, he lowers his phone a little and speaks again. "Do you know when next bus will come?" "In 2 minutes or so-" "In 2 minutes, like that guy said." Shaking his head slightly, he drops the voice recording, sighs and puts his phone back in his pocket, opening the front of his coat a little, causing steam to form when his hot breath meets the air.

Unable to take your eyes off him, you turn around, realizing that you have been staring at him for a long time. "Ah- sorry. I wasn't listening.." You whisper to your friend on the other end of the phone, and when you hear a laugh from her, you look down with a slightly embarrassed face. "Yeah, don't worry it was obvious, anyway." Your pupils dilate as her voice on the phone gets louder and what she says gets louder. "I was wondering if maybe we could go to a club, what do you say? We can visit the place where my friend hangs out all the time."

"A club?" Your voice must have come out louder than you intended because you hear the sound of the stranger moving next to you, so you clear your throat and continue speaking. "I mean, sure. When exactly?" You're not a person who can drink, you cannot put anything in your mouth except light things because it affects you too much. But it could still be a good way to clear your head...at least for one night to escape your problems. "This night. You don't have any plans, right?" Of course, you didn't have any plans. You couldn't really have any other plans than going to your apartment and staying there all day. "Sounds good." Before you know it, the bus has already arrived. You raise your head and take a step towards the bus, telling your friend that you will call her later. You get into the same bus with the stranger next to you and take a seat in the back. You place the medicine bag on your lap, putting your hands in the pockets of your coat. Your coat is closed enough to cover your neck and the tip of your nose, so half of your face is not visible.Your hair is slightly fluffed up from the cold air as it hangs slightly in your eyes, and with a sigh you watch the other stranger take a seat near the front.The bus is almost empty with only a handful of people.

When you come home, you reach for your keys to open the door, you hear the sound of the key turning and tiny footsteps approaching. As you close the door behind you, you feel a soft sensation around your feet accompanied by a meowing sound.

"I'm home."

You lean over and pick up your cat as you lazily toss your bags and coat aside; she always loves to greet you. You feel her head rubbing against your neck as she licks your cheeks softly, not bothering to put your shoes away as you walk towards the living room with your cat in your arms. You watch your cat as you slowly place her on the couch, spinning around and sitting down, her tail tucked under her. As a small giggle leaves you, you put your hands on your knees and stand up, heading towards the kitchen to give your pet a treat. You head towards your front door to lock it before heading into the kitchen, taking off your shoes and grabbing your coat and medicine bag. You go back to the kitchen and reach for the cat's treats from the upper cabinets. As you place some in one of the fancy iron containers you bought earlier, you notice that the cat has already come to you. You take the treat from the counter and place it in front of her, leaning back against the counter as you watch her purr and eat her treat. Remembering that you need to call your friend, you start looking for your phone in your pockets, thinking it can be on the couch, you head towards it, reach for your phone and lie down on the couch. You start driving around the house looking for him. It takes a few minutes for her to pick up, so you have to call again. Meanwhile, you've come to your room and you're already trying to decide what to wear. When you hear your friend's voice on the other end of the phone, you turn your attention back to your phone.

"Hiiii!!" "Hi there." You place your phone on your shoulder and look in your closet. Maybe you should wear something more masculine since you're going to the club. "Are you ready yet?" "Uh, not yet. But I'll be." After hearing your friend's voice of approval, the sound of a key catches your attention. She must be leaving the house.

You still hadn’t decided what to wear when she ended the call by saying she would send you the address as a location. "Okay- bye." You gently placed your phone on your bed and your eyes caught a shirt you hadn’t worn before, thinking it was too big. "I could make this work.." After whispering quietly, you start to make your outfit by checking the time, deciding to do your hair last. You played with your hands strangely as you looked in the mirror. You didn't look bad, you seemed to be in good shape. You didn't look official, but... you didn't look homeless either. You just forget about it and reach into your closet for a small hair tie, You put a small ponytail in the back of your hair. Even though it was small enough to be called a ponytail.. it looked cute. You tilted your head to the side and looked at your hair, giggling to yourself as you put the final touches on it and got ready to leave the house. You know, closing the windows.. turning off the lights and checking on your beloved cat.

When you realize that she is already asleep, your doubts are lifted for a moment, at least you won't have to worry about her anymore. You grab your keys and walk out the door, whispering a small 'goodnight' from your lips, and as you close the door you set off on your way. It was a little late, since you went to the club. When you approach the location where your friend sent, you encounter your friend near the door. She greets you by raising her hand. "Hereee!" You quicken your steps a little and come to your friend, taking your hand out of your pocket and giving her a small wave. "Did I keep you waiting?" You ask in a cheerful but low voice. Your friend, who shakes her head in refusal, fixes her hair before going inside, and you are surprised that there is no line while gesturing for you to come in as well.

You follow your friend with your arms crossed, you didn't want to get lost in a place you didn't know, even if it wasn't crowded. She left you alone to find her friend and said she'll come back, leaving you to get the drinks. You sit down in an empty seat, and as your eyes wander to the people inside, you notice that most of them are already drunk. A whistle from behind you draws your attention to the barista in front of you, who was looking at you with one hand on the counter and the other on his hip.

"Hey pretty boy, have you decided what to order?"

Pretty boy? "Uh, anything light." "First time?" "More than that touches me." "Got ya." The barista turns around, slamming his hand on the counter mockingly, you watch him with your full attention as he prepares your drink. Even if you don't pay much attention at first, his face looks familiar. You notice that he's turning his head to someone else and humming something to them while holding your glass in his hand. As you look into your glass, you notice that he has a few rings on his hand. Even though it's something unnecessary, you're intrigued by the fact that he's wearing jewelry. As he turns his attention to you, he taps his tongue and hits the glass with his index finger, making the ring make a sound with the tapping.

He holds the glass out in front of you and speaks in a lower voice. "And..here you go. A white wine spritzer for the new guy." As you thank him and take your drink, you finally figure out why his face looks familiar.

This was the same man you saw at the bus stop. Only now his hair was more.. different. It looked more well-groomed and didn't cover his eyes like it did at the bus stop. As you wrap your hands around your glass, you notice your friend sitting down next to you. Playfully pushing your shoulder, she calls out to the barista for her drink. "Heyy, sup?" "Hey." While he was busy with another drink in his hand, he looks at the two people next to you with an eyebrow raised. Especially to the friend who is the reason you came here. "You are all together?" The person your friend knows tells you that you guys are new here and that she invited you. He bites his lower lip a little and hums in approval. When the drink he was preparing is finished, he leans slightly towards you, placing his elbows on the counter.

"I thought your friends would be crazy like you, but they seemed pretty normal."

His eye points at you, making you flinch for a moment. You listen to their conversation as you take a sip of your drink. "Yeahhh, well you can't know that. Maybe they are crazy, huh?" The person mocking the barista, with her hands on the counter and her head on her knee, also smacks your friend on the arm, causing the two of them to laugh. You could only stare at them as you traced the edge of your glass with your fingertip. You weren't bothered by it, but you couldn't bring yourself to let them get along and you just sit on the sidelines. In a moment of courage, you down the rest of your drink in one go, tapping your glass on the table as you reach up to wipe your mouth, but you notice your friend is looking at you.

Your friend looked at you with a funny look, shouting something at you and disappeared with her friend. "Don't go too far, you already know why!!" The atmosphere got tense for some reason as she left you alone with the barista again. You slowly pass your empty glass towards the man in front of you, a hum coming out of your mouth. "Can I get something.. heavier?" Shaking his head slightly, he returns to his work again. Even though you didn't drink anything heavy yet, you still didn't feel very well. Your stomach hurt a little and your head ached slightly. But you didn't want to drink the same thing over and over. And if you consider that the person in front of you is a man...maybe trying some heavy stuff would be a good experience. Your feet were actually touching the ground, but you stood on your tiptoes to make yourself look taller. You realized your drink was ready when his footsteps approached. This time he didn't say what it was as he handed you a red glass. You weren't very good with drinks, so you couldn't guess. He cocked his head slightly to the side as he looked at her with a raised eyebrow. "Don't know what it is?" "No.." "Don't care about it, just drink. It does taste good, so don't worry." He says quickly as he wipes his hand on the apron tied around his waist. After all, you’re not his only customer.

You take a sip and try to guess, was it wine again?

You take another sip, but this time it feels sweeter, like there's something wrong with your taste.

Even if you don't get what it is, you continue drinking because you like the taste. In the meantime, your friend comes to you once again. She's not drunk, but she looks a little... messy..Your friend says she wants to leave early and asks if it's okay with you. At first you want to leave the club with her because it means you'll be alone, but then something tells you to stay. "Nah, I guess I'll stay a bit longer." Your friend gives your arm a gentle squeeze, telling you to be careful. Her friend next to her shouts something before leaving. "Nam-gyu! The guy who came with me will still be here, keep an eye on him!" Even if you don't know who it is at first, you eventually do when the barista raises his hand in acknowledgement.

Maybe you could talk to him since you know his name now. That you saw him at the bus stop and... felt like talking. Maybe it would be better if you don't say the last part. With them leaving completely, you are left alone for a while, thinking about taking out your phone and walking around. In the meantime, the man you were dying to talk to appears in front of you again.

"I see you finished your drink?" "Yeah, just finished." "Want me to make something heavier again? I thought 'more than that touches you'." You feel a slight blush on your face, yes you said that..and yes it really touched you. "Well I'm not the best at the moment but," You put your phone back in your pocket and continue talking. "I wanted to try something new...even though I knew I would get worse." "That's not cool bro." "Huh?" The man in front of you speaks in a ridiculous tone while pointing at several drunk and sober people on the sides. "There are even people who come here and just drink coke, and believe me, they can get crazy drunk." You frown at him, not quite understanding what he's saying. Are you supposed to be offended? "There's no need to waste yourself trying something new." It felt ironic that he was speaking as a barista. After all, it was his job to make and sell drinks.

"And this is coming from a barista, huh?"

He just chuckled at your question and rolled his eyes jokingly. Even though you didn't talk much, you already felt close to him, and it was obvious that he was a fun person.

"Anyway, why you didn't leave with your friends?" The question made you freeze suddenly. How exactly could you say that he was the whole reason you stayed? But you decided that now wasn’t the time to be shy, so you cleared your throat and answered him. "We met before actually, kind of, I saw you at the bus stop." You paused for a moment between sentences and corrected yourself. He blinked and made a face as if he were trying to remember. He must have remembered afterwards because a few words fell from his lips. "Ohh, the guys I asked the bus, yeah?" "Yeah!" "What a confidence. I didn't think you'd be in this club." Oh right..He was still with you when you talked about the club. "Ah- yes, yes.. I didn't think we would..met as well." As you reach out to scratch your neck, your slightly undone hair tie comes into your hand. As you look at the hair tie that has fallen into your palm, your hands go to tie your hair back up when he stops you. "Leave it, this suits you." Coming from someone with long hair, it meant more to you. "If you say so." It occurred to you that it might be getting late, and as you look at your phone in sudden panic, you realize it's past midnight. "Oh, fuck."

"Everything alright?" He asks in a worried and curious tone as you turn off your phone and put it back in your pocket. "Not really- I just didn't realize it was getting this late." "You have plans or something?" This question again.. "No, not at all. I just don't like sleeping late." After nodding his head to show that he understands, he clears his throat by hitting the counter with his hand. "Okay, then. You better get going." "Right, right. Do you guys take cards?" "Sure. Lemme make it for you really quick." You take your wallet out of one of your pockets and hand him your card. After going to a place not too far away and paying, he comes back with a piece of paper along with the card. "All done. And here is my number. In case you'll think about coming here again, let me know so I can get you on my shift, yeah?" "Thanks." You grab the paper with the card and tuck them in your wallet before standing up. After fixing your clothes, you turn your attention to Nam-gyu.

"Talk to you later..Nam-gyu." You said it loud enough for him to hear. Hoping you didn't mix up his name. He looked at you and tried to get your name out of his mouth, but since he didn't know, he just let out a breath and said goodbye to you. "See ya."

As you head home, you look at the paper in your hand. The number was written quickly and the last numbers were a little blurry because the ink hadn't dried yet. Since there were no buses, you preferred to walk, and maybe it would make you feel better. Your stomach still ached and you could feel the drinks you drank stuck in your throat. You were almost at your house when you felt like throwing up. You didn't want to embarrass yourself since there were a few people around. You entered your apartment building with one hand over your mouth, sobbing as you climbed the stairs to your own apartment. The first place you went to when you entered the house was the sink. You looked at yourself in the mirror as you unintentionally threw up the things you drank. Your face was sour because of the taste that remained on the tip of your tongue. "..I knew I shouldn't have had that second glass.." As you’re mad at yourself under your breath, you remember the number he gave you.

You quickly cleaned yourself up, letting the cold water hit your face. You sat down on the dull bathroom floor and picked up your phone. "Let's see.." You carefully write down the numbers and save it in your phone. You want to look at his social media with your save. While you are curiously scrolling through your apps, you notice that there is usually no profile photo, but the profile photo on one of them catches your attention. He looked like when you saw at the stop.. His hair was messier and he was dressed in a nicer style. His tattoos, which you didn't notice at the club, were also visible in his photo. You feel a little ashamed that you found yourself stalking him. What was your problem? Maybe it's his looks..and that he calls you a man.. You get up, shaking off your thoughts. It was obvious that you were going to have no sleep tonight, but you still took a sleeping pill to try your luck. The fact that he was on your mind even though you guys didn't talk for more than a day caused your cheeks to turn pink. Maybe you could have spent your time wandering around the house..even if you wanted to, you couldn't call him at this hour.

Before you knew it, it was already morning, you couldn't say you were doing well. But you weren't too bad either, you checked the time and planned to start your daily routine.

09:00 am

You remember that you need to make breakfast before you sit down at your computer. Of course, you didn't forget your beloved cat either, she woke up before you and had already left her food bowl in front of the kitchen. Thinking of her before yourself, you place the food bowl full of food next to your cat's bed. She gets up excitedly, meowing at you while eating her own food with small chews.

You prepare your own breakfast and get down to work. Since you were working from home, you had nothing to worry about. Well, we could say that you were able to have a comfortable working environment. When it's time for a break, you want to scroll through your phone, and then the number you saved last night catches your attention. "Nam-gyu.." As you silently read his name with your lips, you thought it would be a good idea to call him. Maybe you could say a 'what's up man?' or just..have a little chat. After a swallow, you wait for him to pick up the call. And after a few seconds later, you hear a voice on the other side of the phone. "Hi?" "Hey there." "Do I know you?" Oh right. Your number wasn't saved on his phone. "I-it's me. From last night- remember? The guy you talked to?" While you're hoping for him to recognize you, you feel momentarily uneasy when the person on the line remains silent. "Ohh- yeah, the one I gave my number. What's up?" "Yes, that one. Just wanted to say hi while I'm on my break." He speaks after clicking his tongue. "Sweet, I'm still at home. you must have guessed I'm on the night shift. Shitty night shifts.."

"Actually, I'm at home too, I mean- because I work from home." There was a slight edge in your voice. Like he was going to judge you. But right now, he seemed to be in a good mood. Before he can respond, you quickly add something else. "It didn't seem very busy yesterday actually?" "You think like that. Do you have any idea how hard it is to deal with drunk sons of bitches?" After a small chuckle, he continues. "Especially when their own whores are with them." You didn't expect his mouth to be like..this.

"Yeah.. right." After a small hum comes from the end of the phone, you ask him to repeat it. "You're up tonight?" "Up?" "Down for getting drunk, duh." He continues his speech while assuming a tone of voice as if he had just remembered something. "You can't drink too much, can you? After they left, I got a message from my friend not to give you any shit that's heavy." God, this is embarrassing. Yeah, what they said was true, but saying it like that made you feel less of a... man. A few unexpected words escaped from your lips as you involuntarily nodded his approval. "But I still wanted to try." "Is that soooo.." "Yeah." There was silence between you for a few seconds, then he replied with a sound as if Nam-gyu was sucking his teeth. "Hell..you'll stay with me, though? With the promise of leaving if you get any bad feeling." "Promise."

The night went better than expected. Nam-gyu turned out to be a bit more foul-mouthed than you thought, but he still kept in touch with you. You two drank together him without leaving your side. There was one scene that you couldn't forget, especially on your way back home.

While drinking together, everyone raises their glasses, and when you’re the last one not to raise your glasses, Nam-gyu grabs your shoulder and pulls you towards him. "Don't be shy, pretty boy. Come onnn, cheersss!" You thought he didn't realize what he was saying because he was half drunk, but you wanted to bring it up in your conversation the next day. Although it has been a few days since you met him, you spent your days hanging out with him. You were talking to him on the phone again, telling him how your night went and stuff. "Right, right. Good thing that you weren't drunk enough to start hitting on others. Hell, you'd look hilarious." Hilarious? "Why did you say that now.. I'd not." "Yeah-uh, you would. We hung out together all night anyway, glad you enjoyed the night." "Ah- yep. Thanks." You almost forgot what you had to ask for a second, he would go silent sometimes because he was having breakfast.

"You called me pretty boy, though."

"Hm?" After finishing the mouthful, he speaks again.

"Fuck, I did? I mean, it's true but I don't remember saying it."

So he actually meant it. "Isn't it normal because you were drunk?" Oh yeah, definitely.. it's also normal for him to be all over you because he was drunk. "Yeahhh..anyway. You feel any good?" "Mhm, pretty good." Mentally? Yes. But physically, honestly speaking, you were a mess. You hadn't been taking your medication regularly for a few days, and you especially didn't touch your medication the day you went out drinking. You didn't even have the energy to take a shower as soon as you got home and threw yourself into bed. But you still couldn't give up on this feeling. The way he talked to you and the way you felt more manly when you were with him.

The cheerful voice you hear before you hang up the phone makes your heart stop for a moment. "See ya around man." And just like that the call ends. You smile to yourself as you place the phone back on your lap.

You continued going out with him like this for the last few weeks, until one day you tried something a little heavier. You saw him take drugs while you were drinking. And this time he offered you a little too. His eyes were half-closed and his bangs were stuck to his face. You two weren't actually inside the club, you had already left a couple mins ago. You were standing on a bench at the side of the street. The cold air hit your face and you weren't exactly drunk, you had chosen to drink less. Despite that, your stomach ached and you weren't feeling very well. He held a slightly crushed pill in his hand, extending his palm towards you. "Take some." "Uh, no. I'm good." "Ugh. Take it." He brings his palm towards your lap, urging you to take it. You think again, involuntarily taking it from his hand. You feel like throwing up for a moment and go to cover your mouth with your free hand. Nam-gyu moves closer to you, placing his hand on your knee as he tilts his head slightly to the side. He hiccups a few times as he tries to understand what’s going on. You take your hand off your mouth and turn your head to the man next to you. He was watching your face with his mouth slightly open. The moment you turn to him, he can't help but laugh a bit.

"Fuck it, one time wont hurt." Still indecisive, you look at his face. When he realized you weren’t going to do it on your own, he lazily grabbed your hand and popped the pill into his own mouth, chewing it a few times. You were so focused on the sound of the pill breaking that you didn't realize his lips brushed against yours until a little sound came from him. After feeling a few pieces of dust in his mouth, he pulls back from you, his head hitting your shoulder before he returns to a sitting position with his head down. Your eyes widened as you felt your cheeks turning pink. You were practically awake as he sat next to you as if nothing had happened.

You looked at him, swallowing hard, and opened your mouth to say something. But you didn't want to press the issue, you knew he wouldn't remember what he said because he was already so high. Or what he did.

But you would be lying if you said you weren't high either. You weren't feeling very well and your head was spinning. You were either going to stay here numb, or you were going to go home. You weren’t going to sleep in the middle of the street. So you struggled to get up and held Nam-gyu’s hand. He threw a curious look at you and tried to get up as well, laughing to himself as he fell onto your back. Hell, you two were high as fuck. He didn't keep his mouth shut, asking you ridiculous questions as you two headed towards your apartment. Nam-gyu, who threw himself on the couch as soon as you entered, was in a much worse state than you. To wake up you either had to take a shower or go to sleep like him. Nam-gyu didn't sleep even though he was on the couch. He doesn't make a sound while looking at your sobbing figure. "I'm gonna take a..bath. You stay there." He put his head on the edge of the couch and makes eye contact with you. He closed his eyes and made a gesture of approval. This way you go to your own room...good thing you have a personal bathroom.But when you start taking off your clothes, some footsteps catch your attention. As you take off your seat belt, you notice that the door is slightly open.

"Man..fuck this shit my head hurts like hell.." He speaks to you as he struggles to stand. He must be starting to wake up a little, but you doubt he's still conscious. "Mhm..what about taking a hot shower?" "..Hot shower?" "Yeah." He sits on the edge of your bed, one hand playing with his hair as he walks into the room. You keep your hands still on your belt, finally catching Nam-gyu’s attention as you throw it onto the bed. He gives you a look that you can't understand. But your mind is still stuck on the warm feeling of his lips on yours. You don't want to take your pants off in front of him, suddenly you turn your attention to the bathroom with the sound of water overflowing and say a few words to him. "The left door at the end of the hallway is the bathroom.. I think you should take a shower too." He makes a sniffling sound and then his eyes move from your hands to your face. Without saying anything, he leaves the room and heads to the bathroom.

With him gone, you can finally go to the bathroom. But the thought of what would you do if he didn't leave eats you alive. Would you really take it off in front of him? You pray to god he left. Taking a shower really did feel good, just like you thought it would. The warm water hitting your skin made you felt more alive. Especially after smoking it, you thought you wouldn't find yourself at home. You head towards the living room in your pajamas, the wet drops in your hair soaking your shoulders. Nam-gyu had already left the bathroom before you and was letting his hair combs dry on the edge of the couch. His eyes were watching the ceiling, and he lifted his head slightly when he noticed you coming.

"Finally." With a sigh, he raises his hands to tuck the hair behind his ears. You realize his rings are gone, they were lined up on the table along with his phone.

"My bad, it took me a bit to..feel better." After muttering to him with a guilty conscience, Nam-gyu pats the back next to him, gesturing for you to come over. "Yeah whatever man.. come on." As you sit next to him and watch his movements, you realize that he is waking up with difficulty. He would close his eyes from time to time and open them again as if he had woken up from sleep. Suddenly, you remembered your medication. Maybe it would be better for your health to get a few. "Oh, wait-" You reach out from the couch and pick up a bag that's on the table. "What's that?" Nam-gyu spoke more soberly. "My medications..I haven't taken them for a long time." As you look at the pills, you remember that moment again, you hoped to get better by taking your medication. Nam-gyu speaks lazily as he looks at the pills in your hand. "Is there anything that helps with headaches?" "Yeah." You lift one of the few pills left on your right and wave it in the air. As you come to him with a glass of water in your hand, he throws his head on the couch and glares at you. He waits for you to put the pill in his mouth with his mouth slightly open, and when you hand him the glass of water, he swallows the pill dryly, shaking his head. "No need." You put the water in your hand aside and hold on to the couch with your hands. You tilt your head to the side and look at the face below you.

His eyes were probing your face as if he was going to eat you alive. One hand comes to your face, pinching your nose he speaks in a low voice. "Like what you see? Heh." You frown at him and back away from the couch. You decide it’s a good idea to change clothes since your wet hair has completely soaked your shoulders.

You walk towards your room and take off your clothes. Before you can put on another t-shirt, you feel two hands grab your bare arms. You turn your head, startled by the cold feeling. Nam-gyu’s eyes roam over your body as his muscles twitch slightly in response to your reaction. "Were you always that..skinny?" You step forward and try to ignore what he says. Either he was high or he was seriously trying to get close. The first option seems like it might be more realistic for you. He stayed at your apartment that night. And even if you didn't want to admit it, he was acting closer to you. He would call you in the morning with his sleepy voice and ask about your plans, and when he came across ridiculous customers, he would send you messages about them.

"Someone just picked the drink that he threw up, fucking weirdoooo.."

"I mean seriously, people have no taste when it comes to drinking..."

He even agreed to come to the hospital with you. Even though he accompanied you to drink, he also cared about your health sometimes. One day when the weather was rainy and cold, he offered to pick you up with his car. You had been in his car a few times already, so you knew where he usually parked. You practically ran out of the apartment, holding Nam-gyu's hand as you quickly walked in the rain to find the car. "Wait, wait— it's not like the car is gonna run away." Before you could even guess, you fell to the ground because of the wet floor, and he fell on top of you, causing all the water on the ground to splash onto you two. You could hear him swearing under his breath, his eyebrows slightly furrowed as he stood over you, supporting himself with his hands. "Asshole- look at me. I'm all soaked." But you couldn't answer him, the sound of the rain falling and the water dripping from the ends of his hair onto your cheeks..he just looked so stunning. His wet eyelashes made it hard to see his eyes, but the way he looked at you was priceless. You could see your own reflection in his pupils, and you couldn't help but notice his rising and falling chest. Your body was moving without you realizing it, your hands cupping his cheeks as you lowered his face towards yours, letting your lips taste each other. His cold lips were trembling against your warm ones. You couldn't hear any sounds, as if he had forgotten to breathe. After you pulled away, he just stared at you. He stared at you in surprise for a few seconds, as if he hadn't kissed you before.

"..Holy shit, dude." Your cheeks quickly begin to heat up as you realize what you've done. You pull yourself up and try to stand up. "Oh god- S-sorry. It just, happened. I swear-" He responded with a mocking look at you as his hands rested next to your shoulders. "Yeah?" "Y-yeah! Please just forget about it, youjustlookedsogood, I couldn't-"

"Shut up and get in the car, dude."

"Okay.."

When you two got into the car, you felt very strange in the seat next to you, a feeling like you were never close before filled you. Nam-gyu’s voice makes you swallow your words as you were taking a deep breath to explain yourself. "It was obvious that you were interested in that kind of shit but, fuck dude. I didn't think you would do it with me." "Huh?" "I mean, even your look gives it away." The words hit you in the face as if you had been beaten. You felt like you were sinking into the ground as you stared at him with your pupils constricted. Nam-gyu lets out a sigh of relief, combing his hair back with one hand as he smiles at you sarcastically. "Hah..did you like it though?" "What?" "The kiss." Pursing his lips, he makes a kissing sound, and responds to you by tilting his head to the side. "You liked it?" You don’t answer him and just stare at the side window of the car. An embarrassed expression covers your face as you realize he's muttering something under his breath.

"We still have time..wanna do it?"

"..Do what?"

You understood right after that second what he meant with the sly look he threw at you. He was fucking hard. When you came home you were not only wet but also... sticky. You limped a little as you walked into the your apartment, the scene in the car coming back to you as you noticed the sticky liquid on your t-shirt, and the corner of your lip was still bleeding slightly. "Did you really have to bit my lip..that hard?" "It's ridiculous that you talk as if your voices didn't fill the car." "Shut up!" After playfully punching him on the shoulder, you left to take a shower. When you looked at yourself in the mirror in your bedroom, you felt your eyes flutter for a moment. But you ignored it and headed towards the bathroom anyway. As you can imagine, this wasn't your first time. He would try to have a quickie with you whenever he got the chance. And you were completely off your medication. Other than taking pills just to sleep, you wouldn't take anything else except the pills Nam-gyu gave you. And your relationship continued like this for a few months. During that time Nam-gyu 'borrowed' a lot of money from you. Not enough to put you in debt but.. there wasn't nothing he wouldn't do to get high. But as your relationship became more formal..you felt like people were starting to judge you. Not for being with a man, but for being with him. Almost everyone who knew him was astonished and asked how you managed to endure him. I mean..yeah he wasn't the best. But he had taken your first time and you had never felt this comfortable with anyone before. Plus, even if you were physically shit, he made you feel good. Was that even possible?

You even got matching tattoos together. He got a butterfly tattoo and you got a bloody rose tattoo to represent him. He always loved your chest. The feeling of being able to feel your bones when he touched it gave him a pleasure he couldn't describe. That's why you had it done on the left side of your chest. He had it done on his left arm, so that it would be visible, like the other tattoos. But all good things must come to an end, right? Especially if you're not a healthy person. Even though you liked how it was.. sometimes your body couldn't handle it. Pushing yourself too hard would make you feel weak in the coming days.

Because of this, you couldn't even see Nam-gyu at all sometimes, you couldn't even reply to his messages. You had become unable to leave your house. You had to give up your beloved cat to your friend and go back on your medication to get better. You were so glad your partner cared about you. You even felt guilty at times because you felt like a burden to him. But...the things you heard about him were starting to make you doubt yourself. And that one voice message you heard was the final straw.

"Him? Yeah, he feels good and all, but...sometimes you know. I feel like a woman would be good too."

That voice message your friend sent you left you shaking in your bed. The fact that it was a drunk voice message tore you apart even more. Maybe he didn't mean it like that? He's doing something to get high almost every night anyway, so maybe he's not talking about you- or maybe he's faking it or something? But him calling you out of the blue in the morning corrected your suspicions. Actually, you had already confirmed this with the message your friend sent you at night. 'I told you so. You can't trust him at all..' You don't answer his phone at first, but then you notice the message he sent you in your notifications. He was asking if you were home. Of course you were home.. But you didn't want to look at his message. You weren't in the mood to talk right now and especially didn't want to hear his voice. How could you trust him now? How could you know he wouldn't lie to stay with you? This time he called you again. When you answered he spoke in a louder tone than you intended. "What the fuck do you think you're doing by not answering your phone, motherfucker?" "I don't wanna talk." "NAH. You're gonna talk. I'm almost at your apartment- don't make me open the door." His voice sounded like he was growling at you, it was obvious that he was mad. You panic when the phone is hung up on you, and as scenarios run through your mind about what he was planning to do, you jump out of your bed when you hear a knock on the door. Swallowing hard, you walked towards the door without bothering to ask who is it. It was obvious who it was anyway. Nam-gyu’s hand grabs the edge of the door as you nervously open it, making you flinch. As you back away from the door, he walks in, closing the door behind him.

"To the living room, now." You frown at him and direct your steps towards the living room. He watches you sit on the couch as he throws his phone on one of the couches. Nam-gyu doesn’t say anything at first as he stands, cracking his knuckles. "The worst shit always happens to me, fucking god."

"But you were the one who said those things?" "And?" Was he serious about what he said just now..He didn't even deny what he said. "You know, you said you didn't want to be with ME- after everything I had done for you!" You shifted your position on the couch and raised your tone towards him. You had every right to be as angry as you wanted right now.

Rolling his eyes, he put a hand over his mouth and sighed as he gave you an answer. "Don't act like I've never done anything to you, now..." He continued, his voice softer. "You know how I am with other people...we were just messing around, I was drunk." You didn't want to answer him. You chose to stay silent. Maybe what he meant wasn't such a bad thing after all?He approached you with his expression unchanging, one hand on the couch and the other holding the end of your hair as he spoke in a low tone. "Yes, yes.. you're always right pretty boy. Forgive me, let's forget about that, yeah?" You knew exactly what he was doing. He didn't even try to cover up what he was doing..

You responded with a tone that indicated that it was unintentional. He might have the upper hand over you, but that didn't always mean you would obey him. "Really? Isn't that what you always do... to make up for your mistakes by covering them with the pleasure you give me?" You clearly hear him click his tongue, and he bites his lip lightly, showing you that signature smile again. ".. Exactly, you know me so well..I'm kind of embarrassed." His hands have already moved down to your thighs before you even notice. His eyes slowly drift down as his thumbs play with the elastic of your sweatpants. "Come on...just for this once. You know how much I love you, right?" Oh how you loved his words..his choice of words was driving you crazy. It was like all your anger was gone in an instant. You took a deep breath and mumbled one last sentence under your breath.

"Y-you're right.." As your eyes follow his fingers, you watch the sweatpants fall down from your waist. He lowers his hand, which was playing with your hair to your chest, making you lean back into the couch.

"..But I should admit. I hate how you can do both." His breathing becomes heavy as his eyes roam over your bare skin, and he says the words in between breaths. "Hate how you're pretty as a woman and..attractive as a man. I can feel drunk just by looking at you." You were melting under his touch and words, he must have noticed you were getting hard because he already had you in his grasp. Nam-gyu felt himself harden as the tiny moans coming out of your mouth filled his ears. He pulls his hand from your tent and lays you down completely on the couch, your arms falling around your face as you suddenly feel his hardness against yours. One hand cups your face to brush the hair off your forehead, while the other runs across your bare skin.

"What do you think..will you last for a few rounds?" You turn your face to the side, not wanting to make eye contact during it. "..Maybe." but he stops you with his hand and whispers one last thing.

"Nuh uh..don't take your charming eyes off me..pretty boy."

okay so ngl i wanted to add MOREE stuff, but i choosed today as the deadline cuz of the date..haha..anyway. please tell me if there's any typos cuz, no proofread..

[fanaticsnail]

FUCK ME SNAIL!

Donquixote Rosinante: Winter Soldier AU

I am frothing at the mouth over this idea because he deserved so much better than death

not saying that being a winter soldier is better but at least he wouldn't be dead

I am deceased 💀

KNOW THAT I WANT TO WRITE IT SO BAD, HONEY BEE. I know it'd be a lot of work, but I can just hear the little:

"Cora-san?" Law asks with wide eyes, taking a step back and staring up in horror and awe at the man he once knew. His lip shudders at the anguish and pain the ghostly shell of familiarity overcame him at the man before him.

"Who the fuck is 'Cora-san'?" The man clad in black asks coldly before resuming his onslaught of bullets and deflecting attacks from the Heart Pirates rising to their captain's defence.

The voice rang in his mind, causing Law to focus on the tinea whistle recalling him to his youth. Bepo shaking his shoulders while protecting him from harms way did nothing to break him out of his visage. All he could see in place of the man striding towards him with heavy foot-falls was a single phrase that haunted him to this day.

"Leave him alone. He is free." Before a flurry of bullets punctured his minds eye.

Bepo was struck away from his captain with a single whipped gun-lash. A captain who was too distracted by sitting in his memory to notice. A captain who's eyes were now focussed on the black leather military pants in front of his sitting position.

"I'm... I'm your friend," Law tried one final time, peering up at the blonde man who began reaching for him through eyes that reflected nothing but emotionlessness.

"You're my mission, nothing more."

JUST RAAAAAAAAAA. I don't know what to do with this plot swirling around in my head. Do we want it to be a reader fic, or a truly Canon divergent fic focussed on these two meeting up again? There are so many scenes I could write. The "I knew him" before another mind wipe. My gosh. Can you imagine??

[galaxymacbeth]

John can’t really help himself.

It’s well written and she took the time to highlight the area they were in. He didn’t know Urzikstan was known for its cuisine before being taken over. Maybe next time they were there, he could convince Farah—

“Cap.”

He looked up. His boys stood in the doorway of his office, each wearing an expression of curiosity and smugness on Simon’s part.

“Boys,” John said, turning his chair to face them and not the article, “need me?”

“It’s almost dinner, Cap,” Kyle said. Sweet Kyle who always made sure the team ate together, “hadn’t seen you all day.”

“Just busy,” John pushed himself to stand and rounded his desk, “let’s eat.”

Each of them eyed him as he moved past them and down the hall. Simon chuckled, nudging the sergeants to follow, and closed the door behind him. He knew what John had been reading. Again. For the third time since Monday. It was Tuesday.

The mess was barren, given that dinner didn’t actually start for another ten minutes, but the cooks were always kind enough to let them eat before anyone else.

“What’re ye up tae,” Soap asked when they sat down.

“Paperwork,” John said. Simon smirked again but didn’t say anything.

“Heard from Alex,” Kyle interrupted, “said they were...strategizing.”

“Back to Farah, then?” Soap grumbled but John’s body began to vibrate.

He should know better.

But he can’t fucking help himself.

To no one’s surprise, Laswell had them on a plane two weeks later. Ghost grinned through the briefing and the gear up. He grinned through the “John, a minute?” as he corralled the sergeants to the gym for a last minute sparring session he was sure the captain would join them for.

John, however, was not grinning.

“I’m a grown fucking adult, Kate,” he growled at the laptop. Kate stared at him.

“You’re a man. And she’s pretty, I’ll give her that. Stay. Away.”

“Last I checked,” John stood to his full height even if she couldn’t stand in front of him to be intimidated, “I head this task force and I don’t take orders from you.”

“We head this task force together, John. And if I tell you to stay far away from a news reporter, then you will.” Kate crossed her arms over her chest and stared at him again.

“I have no interest in talking to her again.” Kate rolled her eyes.

“I’m sure. Keep it that way, then. Farah needs your full attention.”

John slammed the laptop shut before he could say something stupid and wrestled it into his arms. As he left the room, his phone vibrated.

S In the gym sparring

Yeah. John could use some sparring.

Once in Urzikstan, they were whisked into a tent with Farah and Alex. John was unconsciously grateful for the distraction. They stood there for hours, discussing the best way to get intel and what to do with it. It was Soap nodding off that finally ended Farah’s fiery ranting.

“Go, go sleep,” she said with a hand on Soap’s shoulder. He barely nodded at her as Ghost led him away by the vest to their tent. Kyle rubbed at his face, grimacing at his gloves for a moment, before turning to the captain.

“Sleep, sir?”

“Just a bit longer here,” John shook his head, “be there in a little.”

Kyle nodded, slapping a hand against his back as he shuffled out after Ghost and Soap. Alex mumbled something to Farah and, with a kiss to her head, he followed after them.

“She is not here,” Farah said as John flicked through the papers strewn over the table.

“Who?”

She chuckled and nodded, “your trouble maker. She left last night for Iran.”

John sighed, but didn’t reply. Was the tightness in his chest because he was glad not to have to run into her? It had to be. It needed to be.

“I am making dinner tonight,” Farah continued, “she was right about our food.”

“Good, I’ve been wanting to try it,” John mused, “read somewhere it was good.”

Farah laughed this time and pat his shoulder in dismissal.

The mission was a relative success. Intel was obtained and Ghost handled the informant it came from. All in all, it was a pleasant experience.

Too pleasant.

The showers that the ULF had left much to be desired, but John wasn’t one to look a gift horse in the mouth. He took the most lukewarm shower of his life and pulled on a fresh pair of military issued cargo pants and green shirt. His socks were not fresh, however, and he tried not to think about it when he put them back on and shoved his feet into boots.

The debrief with Farah and Kate would be quick and then he could relax. For the however many hours before Nik would pick them up to shuttle them off to their next mission.

John stepped into the shipping container turned command center to hear Farah and Kate arguing.

“I told you to keep her away from them.”

“I am not her keeper, I have an army to command,” Farah slammed a hand on the table, “revoke her passport if she’s that important.”

“Who told her they would be there?”

John cocked his head and leaned against the wall to listen.

“Are you accusing me of something?”

“It’s incredibly convenient, Farah, you must admit.”

John cleaned his throat and Farah lifted her head to look back at him. Kate’s face soured even further on the screen but she sat up.

“Let’s start.”

“Don’t stop on my account,” John shrugged.

“We got the intel, have you received it?” Farah cracked her neck and waved a hand at the laptop.

John held back a scoff at the two and let the debrief continue. Farah’s shoulders never relaxed and Kate kept eyeing John when she thought he wasn’t looking. Neither of the women mentioned the terse words shared before his arrival and the meeting ended with a short “behave” directed at no one in particular.

John finally scoffed once the laptop was shut and Farah let out a strangled cry.

“Well, that was fun,” a chuckle came from the far end of the container and John’s face paled at it.

“I am glad you think so,” Farah hissed.

“Oh, c’mon, Farah, the woman can be terrifying, but trying to keep me from doing my job?” She smoothed a hand over the PRESS patch on the front her tac vest. “Kate Laswell has another thing coming.”

“You’re supposed to be in Iran,” John finally chokes out. The tightness in his chest loosens and he almost wants to scream at his heart for racing behind his ribs.

“Certain sources alerted me of a...possible story in Urzikstan,” she shrugged, “something about a Russian PMC.”

John growled deep in his chest and turned to Farah. She looked less than happy to see the American too, but her shoulders relaxed and she stood up.

Did no one else understand how dangerous it was for her to be here? National security aside, John had seen how ‘well’ she handled hostage situations and she couldn’t shoot to save her life (literally).

“You told her?”

“Farah isn’t my source, John.”

“Then who is?”

She smirked at him but there was a solid knock on the side of the container before Alex and Ghost stepped in. Their intel was ready to be acted on.

“Just a few words on what’s happening,” she had her tiny notebook and pen in hand and the gratuitous smirk on her face had morphed into a curious frown.

“A recon mission,” Ghost said, “for intel.”

She scribbled each word down and looked back up, waiting for more. Her lashes blinked and John was forced to steel his resolve. Soap’s puppy dog eyes were hard enough to ignore; hers were god damn impossible. He turned his head away from her and saw the glee in Ghost’s eyes. Farah let out a sigh and gave her a carefully crafted quote about collecting evidence of sabotaging of civilian water supply.

With a snap of her notebook, the journalist smiled again. “I’ll be getting out of your hair, now.”

But certainly not out of his mind.

She pranced from the container and Alex tipped his head out to make sure she was gone before he and Ghost laid into their next mission.

dividers by @/cafekitsune

oh, would you look at that. it consumed me.

[0neir0z]

So, I read your post about the idea of Alex and Nigel having internalised homophobia. And I’m actually kind of invested, so how do you think that internalised homophobia would present itself in both of them? Especially if let’s say miraculously Nigel didn’t die and they got to continue being crazy. Would they ever realise “this is kind of gay” or not?

omg hi this is my first ask but here's what i think!

tbh started thinking about this when i did this one trend on tik tok, and thought about far too much for a silly tik tok slideshow:

and specifically the order i put them in, as honestly it seeeemed intuitive at first and then i was hit with This Concept (will elaborate dw).

let's start with alex and his deal with this, i think it is less of a stretch. it's mostly just where and Who he is. (like come on teenage straight boys are So homophobic sometimes. can't even imagine how bad it was then if they're casual about that now.) the top student at a prestige school. the son of an incredibly rich and influential man set on the track of success. he has a girl he likes. and he can get away with anything he wants because of this and he will expend that privilege to no end. he is defensive of this life, against anything that would disrupt it. that's why he's So distressed by nigels presence. if we play with the gothic trope of murder and other deplorable or taboo actions as a substitute for repressed desire and queerness, this gets even clearer. getting dragged into nigels world and becoming intertwined and entangled in it is his worst fucking nightmare. of all the guys in the world that he could conceive of himself getting close with Like That it's a total Freak. this relationship, especially as alex remembers, is only violent. the only place he felt safe to first confront nigel about his deal was a place that he could easily threaten and endanger him. they're always fighting and alex almost always instigates. he doesn't want to be perceived like that, he doesn't want to feel so understood by nigel. he treats nigel and his actions with utmost disdain until after he died... but he mourned him. putting a pin in this rq to talk about nigel.

ngl this is a Bigger stretch as nigel obviously comes off as way more overtly gay. dawg was staring at his lips for like half the movie. (or maybe that's just how alex remembers it.) but also because his lifestyle is represented as an inherently taboo thing that plagues and poisons alex's life. (which in itself is kind of a homophobic media trope. the homosexual corrupting the upstanding member of society.) and i believe that his reclusion is kind of a double edged sword. he may have come to some terms that he is sexually attracted to men but his antisocial behavior doesn't ever indicate he'd be supportive of it outside of himself. but because he is all these things doesn't mean he understands it fully, understands himself fully. nigel was socialized generally in the same manner as alex, putting aside the abuse and dysfunction in the colbie household. he understands that some day he should be a powerful man. he understands his privilege can buy him time and freedom. he understands that there are social repercussions to how he lives his life and what would happen if he expressed what he wanted in less of a secretive way. i mean literally he keeps it contained to his dorm and his basement. and then The Concept hit me. it's maraclea. his internalized homophobia is manifested in his obsession with finding maraclea. that he and alex will have and take their own, the closest and most sacred relationship to the knights. their harvest widow. but nigel can't be maraclea. it's not right, it doesn't fit his mythology. he and alex cannot have each other in the way that he himself wants, he settles instead for being the spade. the right hand and the implement of killing for his knave, it's close but not quite right. and we see nigel getting close and doing everything but expressing his own feelings for alex. he's obsessed with alex's sex life and obsessed with susan and getting alex to take her as maraclea. he returns to his sexually abusive mother. basically he will do anything but actually kiss that mf. it is something he cannot accept yet.

as for if they'll ever realize if this relationship was queer? likely. ngl. it seemed like whatever they had going on was going to actually escalate there in their own fucked up way. (it's why i think alex mourned nigel and was sympathetic towards him when talking to sally about his life. and probably why he recalled nigel looking at him Like That. he was close to acceptance by that point.) in the inappropriate, obsessive, and violent way their friendship was. it probably wouldn't have been public and open, perhaps them labeling it as (knightly) brotherhood, alliance, or friendship still. but i don't think that would even be easy bc it would have to be secret. private only. if the feelings became romantic, i think that it would eat at nigel. ngl.

idk if that makes sense but ty for reading this if you did ig lol. way longer than i thought it would be.

[pelibirdie]

"A brand new year to remember"

Relationship: Kuras x (GN) reader

A/N: squint and you will see some yearning and pining between the two. Burn so slow the meat is still raw.

That being said happy late birthday to my fucked up biblically accurate guilt ridden husband

Summary: it's Kuras's birthday. Though he is not a man of celebrations, you decide to still do a small gesture for him and keep him company for his birthday.

You lounged on the sides of the clinic. The harsh smell of ointment hung in the air as Kuras treated a burn mark left from a…rather explosive celebration from the night before. By no means was it a pretty sight, but you expected such a focused face from the doctor that stitched your arms back on. His pristine white coat laid on the chair he sat on when there was too many paperwork. His hair was tied back. You could hear nothing but the sharp breaths of the patient and the light chime of his earrings. 

Kuras was a strange man. Something about him stood out like the last star on a night sky. The cruel world you knew so far seemed to not have rubbed off on the man before you. To give out free treatments and walk the streets like nothing could ever harm him… was far too strange. But it brought you comfort and made you feel safer so you decided to spend your days in Eridia helping out in his clinic. Whatever small thing you could do to take your mind off of your curse. 

“Run the water please.” 

You nodded at Kuras and made your way to the small sink of the clinic, cleaning out the bowl of ointment and the scissors. Soon enough, Kuras also came by you to wash his hands off. 

“Something on your mind?’’ 

“Well,” 

“Goodbye, doctor! Happy birthday!” The bloodhound shouted as he left. 

“It’s your birthday?!” You stared at Kuras, eyes wide with interest. He seemed to avoid your gaze, golden eyes fixating on anything but you. “Yes. I’m afraid Leander is once again making a deal out of it.” He sighed as he sat down, letting his locks fall down his tall frame. “I do not have anything against my birthday, but I’m sure you are aware of my distaste towards all the cheap drinking and the Wet Wick. You need not make a big deal out of it. Please. Big celebrations get messy often.” 

You approached him slowly, standing before where he sat. “Alright, I’m not going to ‘make a big deal out of it’. However,’’ You placed a hand on his shoulder, gently swiping away one of the strands of hair off his collarbone. “I am still your friend. And I do think it’ll be nice to step out of the clinic for one night.”  A ghost of a smile crept up its way to the renowned doctors' lips. Kuras slowly took your hand, not removing it from his shoulder. Simply holding it as he stared into your eyes. 

You must look somewhat sheepish and nervous. Because the doctors’ face went cat-ish to your reaction. Eyes turning sharp with amusement. He always had eyes that stood out, bright, golden, unnatural but captivating nonetheless. “I’d be up for that. But only for the evening.” He leaned forward onto his desk resting his right elbow on the hard wood, still holding your hand without breaking eye contact. “You can leave if you please, I doubt the amount of people who made bad decisions when drunk last night is going to lessen in the coming hour or two.” You took a step towards the desk, slowly sitting on it to remain at a higher eye level than him. “Or the third, or the fourth,” you joked.

“So much for the yearly celebrations. I suppose Eridians know how to have fun every once in a while, no?”  

Kuras shook his head “Let them have it, people barely have a good time nowadays.” His eyes fell down again. A small silence followed his words. Only then you notice small changes in his frame, his messier hair, hands dyed in some herbs he used for the ointment, and eyes more tired than usual. “And I will be there to aid them whenever they do make bad desicions.” 

You slowly moved your hand to his arm, giving small caresses to his shoulder with your thumb. Your hands were covered with the bandages, but you also had the gloves you wore around the clinic on. You were used to giving fleeting touches, but these gloves were making you bolder. You cursed in your head, paranoia slowly creeping back into your head. You took your hand off of Kuras, getting up to grab your coat for the cold winter day waiting for you outside the clinics' doors. You smiled as you opened the door, feeling the wind on your skin.

“I’ll see you tonight, doctor.”

“Stay safe, (Y/N).”

The day went by concerningly fast as you went through the market, looking through herbs, scarves, trinkets…anything to get the doctor for his birthday. At least whatever you could afford for now. You looked at the pouch you got while walking back. Staring at the gift to ensure it is safe. You quickly made your way to the Wet Wick, asking Leander for a pen and paper. Soon, you are up in your room writing away. It doesn't occur to you that the sun has set until the Wet Wick starts getting unbearably loud. You run down with your jacket and your gift, dodging the crowd around the bar. “Hey (Y/N)! Have you seen Kuras?’ Leander called from the other side of the Wick, “No sorry!” was all you could shout before making it out of the Wet Wick. 

You sped through the streets. Though it was not safe to wander at night, you had hoped at least your pace and the lit-up streets would make getting to the clinic easier for you. But all thought came to a halt as you heard a wet, crunching noise. A noise of bones being broken and flesh being torn. A noise too familiar. Suddenly you were sprinting, checking behind you every once in a while until you ran face-first to someone. “I didn’t expect you to be this excited.” You breathed a sigh of relief upon seeing his tall frame. Sensing you are shaken up, Kuras held you by your shoulders. “Be not afraid, I am here. Let’s walk towards more light.” 

“Ah, sorry about the scare Kuras. I heard something then-” 

“It is alright, (Y/N). What matters is you are safe.”

Conversation takes over the two of you as you walk and wander through Eridia. Seeing the Amaryllis District's colorful decorations from the celebrations before, sensing the strong smell of fried dough and hearing the shouts of vendors from the stalls, tasting some swirly eridian desert with cinnamon in it (though Kuras seemed to lose the pastry the moment he hold it, leaving you confused as you did not even see him take a bite) the night came to a calm point. 

So far you had discussed about Eridia, how you had somewhat adapted to the city, the celebration yesterday, and certain interesting things you noticed in Kuras’s practice. The conversation gave itself away to peaceful silence as you stood on the bridge between Hightown and Lowtown. Somewhere far in Hightown, you could hear the faint sound of a lute being played. The nights were much less chaotic here. 

“So, how old are you now?”

“Old.” 

“Oh come on, I know that already-”

“Oh are you saying I look old?”

“Kuras!” 

He chuckles to himself as he leans on one of the statues. The night is clear, the stars are bright, and the wind is gentler than it was that afternoon. You take out the pouch and the letter, holding them out to Kuras.

“Happy birthday, Kuras. I hope this year is better than the previous ones.” 

Kuras’s gaze meets your own, his golden eyes and jewelry contrasting the bright moonlight, his hair ticking his face and neck. Kuras looks almost glowing as he takes the items from your hands. “You didn’t need to.” “It was about wanting to. And I did. But please read that letter when I’m not around.” you scratched your neck and looked back at the sky. Kuras blinked, once looking at his full hands and then at you. Suddenly choosing to move much closer to you, until his white coat is touching the warm wool of the cloak he got you when you first came to Eridia. 

“Thank you. (Y/N). I have lost track of my many birthdays, but your presence makes this celebration one to remember.” 

…It felt quite warm all of a sudden. 

[wooahaeruby]

Chapter 42: Bottom of the Stairs

TW

None, but this chapter is just a little sad.

AUTHOR'S NOTE AT THE END, PLEASE READ.

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She hadn’t left his room in four days. 

Jeonghan had been sleeping in Seokmin’s room each night with the younger man, tossing and turning for hours until he succumbed to slumber reluctantly. Before she had settled in, he moved a bunch of his belongings out to make room for her things Sona brought from Mouse’s apartment. He made his bed with all the blankets Mouse loved in the house at the expense of everyone else's lack of comfy blankets. 

When she was cleared later that first day she woke up to leave the ATZ clinic, Mouse rode home with Sona, curled up pitifully in the backseat to get some things from her place. Everyone shared their complaints but when she flinched away from Jongho and Sona when they moved around her and how she scratched anxiously around the collar of her shirt, Cheol shut them up. They got back before the two women did and busied themselves with any task they could find. 

The house, much to no one's surprise, was a mess, none of them could deny it. None of them had the energy to even care about it until now. Clothes, dishes, and general clutter had been piling up since Christmas, but this was another level of mess. Mingyu, usually the top of their cleaning crew, had spiraled into a cycle of cooking and keeping himself busy in every other way and didn’t have the mental capacity to handle anything else on his metaphoric plate. 

By the time Mouse was home, the dishes were scrubbed and put in the dishwasher, all the floors were sweeped, vacuumed, and mopped, and there were two loads of laundry going. It wasn’t spotless, but it was a lot better than the Frat House vibes it was giving previously. 

Mouse was barely in their presences before she retreated, visibly uncomfortable. Sona had given them some information from Seonghwa, that he’d be over as soon as he could with the heart monitor and to check up on her. Joshua had asked how she was back at her apartment and Sona simply shook her head, a general heartbreak washing over the group. Sona said to give her space, to let Mouse come to them and take things slow. She brought her bags into the room before leaving, telling them to call if she needed anything from her place. 

But Jeonghan was clawing at the fucking walls . 

There were times he’d pace the hallway outside his room, or just sit on the floor, staring at the door, hoping she’d come out at any point. 

He had been switching off with Joshua to bring her meals, medicine, anything. Whenever they’d go in, she’d be curled up under all the blankets, silent and in the dark. He hadn’t stopped himself from crying the first few times, other times he’d whisper small words of affirmation and affection as he placed the tray down and quickly left. Some meals she’d fully eat while others she’d barely touch. He had asked Minghao to make a second cup of tea whenever he made some for himself to give to her, knowing she loved those mugs of tea. It was one of the only things she’d regularly finish.

“Can you please chill?” Cheol had been more irritated than ever since she woke up and came home, but he couldn’t be blamed. 

Jeonghan sank lower into the couch, legs bouncing and biting his nails. “I’m going to lose my shit, dude.” 

“I can feel your nervous energy from here. Smoke with Vernon or something.” Looking over the couch, Jeonghan watched as Cheol popped some bread in the toaster for breakfast. 

Only a few of them had gone back to some ‘work’. Seokmin, though hating every moment and planning to leave, was in the city all day for the cover job and back every night in case Mouse woke up. Mingyu and Minghao had taken to cooking lunch meals that were easy to heat up for Mouse. The last three nights Seokmin brough food from the city for dinner, many times it was a favorite place of Mouse which no one minded. Wonwoo had holed himself up in Pandora or went to the city to find any answers if it was actually MX since Mouse hasn’t spoken to them. He had been searching for proof, anything, but nothing was found. 

The youngest three were a… bit all over the place. Seungkwan was taking on more work than he needed to, working himself to the bone. Vernon…when he wasn’t with Wonwoo or handling stuff for Pledis Shipping, was smoking a lot, more than usual. The only one they weren’t too worried about was Chan. He had been coping with exercise, asking Jihoon to go out back to the gym with him to train. Jihoon was making sure he wasn’t overdoing it. 

A knock at the door had both him and the leader tensing. It wasn’t often they got someone waltzing up to their door and knocking. Sona had the simple pass to walk into their home at this point, both a friend and a worker that they trust fully. 

Seungcheol looked to Jeonghan before the sound of a second round of knocking came. 

“I know some of you are home, King !” Rheia’s voice had both of them bulking in confusion. “Open the door.” 

Jeonghan stood quickly from the couch, fixing his clothes and hair on the way to open the door for the older woman. She was bundled up for the early January cold, a large, insulated bag in hand, and two guards standing by her car before she waved them off and they sat inside the vehicle. 

“Uh-” Jeonghan bowed his head and stepped aside, letting her in from the cold. “Hi?” 

“It’s freezing out there!” She shivered, pushing her hood back and smiling at him then Seungcheol. “Now, where can I cook for her?” 

“Can I know how you got our address?” Cheol scoffed, nodding his head towards the counter before him. 

Jeonghan quickly offered to take her coat, which she thanked him for, and shook her head, walking over. “I know just about everything, dear. I’ve known for a while about this place, actually. Same with just about every group in the general area. I would have come sooner but I wasn’t in the country and my flight got grounded because of a hurricane!” 

Joshua sleepily shuffled into the living room, hair wild and clothes rumpled, face planting into the couch cushions. His head almost instantly shot up, eyes wide and full of confusion but Rheia only waved him off. 

“Don’t mind me, I’m here for my girl.” She hummed, unpacking what looked like the makings of chicken soup. “How’s she been?” 

“She hasn’t left bed in four days since coming home.” Jeonghan admitted, rubbing a hand over his face. “But she is eating some. Not sure how she is sleeping. She flinched if she got close, and can’t touch her either.”

Rheia sighed, asking Seungcheol for a pot that he got for her. “I’ll see if I can talk to her.” 

“Anything will help at this point.” 

She worked quickly and efficiently on her cooking, willing to share some since she made more than enough, before asking which room Mouse was residing in. Jeonghan led her to his room, seeing the determined look on the woman’s face. He was praying something she said could help Mouse, even if it got her to leave the room for a few minutes. 

Rheia pushed the door open, flicking on all the lights and kicked the door shut behind her. He could hear Mouse groan, complaining weakly that it was too bright. His heart broke silently in his chest. 

“My old eyes can’t see in this hovel!” Rheia’s voice was heard behind the door, but after Jeonghan didn’t hear much and despite his want to listen in, he gave them privacy. 

He made his way back to the living room, sitting at Joshua’s side now that he was sitting up, legs tucked to his chest. Seungcheol joined on his other side, leaning his head back against the couch and sighing loudly. There was a distant sound of a door opening and closing, and the slow shuffling of feet on the floor before Jihoon waddled in. 

“Don’t you people have jobs to do?”His groggy voice had Jeonghan rolling his eyes. 

“Don’t you?” 

“Hey, whao, watch the attitude,” Jihoon snorted through his nose and snickered, falling onto the loveseat to get comfortable. “I go in at eight tonight and I’ll be back late. Yesterday Mingyu, Seungkwan and I worked out a shift schedule so one of us is going to be home in case anything happens.” 

“How long do you think Rheia will be in there?” Joshua asked, processing the situation fully now. 

Jihoon made a sound of confusion. “Is that who I heard?” 

“Yeah, she showed up.” Seungcheol rubbing his temples. “I hope it isn’t long.” 

And they waited two. Fucking. Hours. 

Vernon and Seungkwan had woken up, made some breakfast before joining the four on the couches. They were filled in when they asked about the pot of soup on the stove, taking in the nervous silence after. No one dared to say a word, uncomfortable and unsure of what would come from Rheia’s impromptu visit. 

Then, like the sun broke through the clouds, Rheia stepped out and entered back into the living room, bowl empty and a small, sad smile on her lips. She placed the bowl in the sink and joined them, sighing quietly. That…wasn’t a good sign. 

“So?” Jihoon broke the shell of silence, dropping his phone into his lap. 

The older woman took a seat beside Jihoon, patting his knee before brushing her hair back. “While she wouldn’t tell me who did this…she did tell me everything they did. She cried a decent amount. I don’t even know where to begin with the information I just heard, however she asked me not to tell a soul until she was ready to say things herself. She might come out, she might not. She needs time.” 

“Do you-” 

“I think it would be beneficial for Mouse to speak to a therapist.” She cut Seungkwan off, straightening her back. “Not…right away, she isn’t ready to even leave the house, but I believe it can help when she can get that far. I have someone in mind, she is a wonderful practitioner and she is a private practice that worked with my girls before. I’ll get a number. Maybe a phone call to start with Mouse, but we can’t force her.” 

Jeonghan groaned, sinking in his spot. 

There wasn’t anything they could do besides wait and he wasn’t enjoying the thought of that option. Patience wasn’t his strong suit, he knew that, everyone knew that… No one looked happy with the information but they were shit out of luck for the time being.” 

“I need to get going, you can finish the soup, however all of you can call me if something happens, if she needs help, or if you need help.” Rheia hummed, standing up. “Things might get worse, harder, before they get better. Keep your chin up for each other and her, boys.”

“No one can help you first, sweetie.” Rheia gave you a gentle smile. “You need to take the first step to help yourself, Y/N.” 

You hated to admit how right she was before she left the room, leaving you in your hovel of safety and protection. No one could hurt you here, it was the main reason you wanted to be here and not in the city. The only person that could hurt you here was yourself.

You also didn't mean to spill your guts to her. Once you got started, it was word vomit that didn’t stop until you were crying, close to a panic attack. She tried to ask who hurt you, nearly begged, but each time you tried to remember their faces and names, you spiraled and forgot how to breathe properly. You could scream the names in your head but no amount of will let you voice it. 

Though you could see Rheia wanted to hold you, she stayed in the desk chair Jeonghan had in his room, a comfortable distance away. You did a lot of crying, babbling that you were struggling but you were terrified of everything. Looking in the mirror was hard when changing bandages over your chest, having spent a few times curled beside the toilet at the sight of yourself. 

Sleep felt useless, it wasn’t restful when you did manage to get any. Nightmares continued to wake you up in a violent, shaking cold sweat, needing to take time to calm down and catch your breath. Almost every single time, you were unable to fall back to sleep. You’d hear something in the middle of the night that ripped you from sleep and you would be too paranoid to even close your eyes. However, you didn’t always want to stay in Jeonghan’s room. 

The previous night you heard Wonwoo leave Pandora and retreat into his room for some much needed sleep. When no one else stirred in the house, you left your sanctuary and escaped to the confines of Pandora to play some games, and you cleaned up after yourself before hiding once more. 

You’ve been hearing the guys talk as well, it wasn’t difficult to. They were constantly worried. You knew Jeonghan and Joshua had spent plenty of time sitting at the door, talking aimlessly to keep themselves busy or sane. Sometimes you’d hear Seokmin talking to the door as if it was you, telling stories to pass the time. 

Rheia told you that it would take time, but locking yourself in wouldn’t help with getting better. Baby steps were her suggestion first, maybe just leave the room for longer periods of time, spending some time with the guys at least in the same room, or cooking to keep yourself busy. 

Again, you hated that she was right. 

Standing up from bed, you shuffled your way into the closet to grab a change of clothes; your leggings, Jeonghan’s oversized t-shirt, and one of Joshua’s sweatshirts you stole. While you were clean, you weren’t really clean. Seonghwa gave you the okay to shower, even giving you a type of bandage to prevent the brand from getting wet, but you didn't have any energy besides a thorough wipe down and changing clothes/bandages. You needed a long overdue everything shower, since baths were way out of the option, and to clean the room a little bit. 

It took you twenty minutes of sitting, wrapped in a towel, staring at the water coming out of the shower head to run your hand under the stream. You couldn’t help the flashes of you locked in the metal box as it filled with water, seeing the glass doors and walks encasing the shower. The further you got into the water, the more you had to step out to stop the racing of your heart and breath. You made sure the water was scolding hot, which helped, but it was still sickening, drenching yourself in water. 

Despite the time it took (when did over an hour pass?), you were just happy you got clean and felt more refreshed. You changed the bandages on your chest, stopping yourself from scratching at the irritated skin around it. It was a worse feeling than the brand itself.

Next on your (somewhat) list was to clean up Jeonghan’s room. In the darkness, you’ve haphazardly tossed dirty clothes, sweat drenched blankets, and things from your suitcase laid about. You made piles of things desperately needing a wash (which…you might pawn off onto one of the guys), and clean, taking it upon yourself to hang clothes in your boyfriend’s closet. He would be over the moon – probably – when he finds out (who were you kidding? He’d be so happy).

“What if we just have Min pick up burgers for dinner?” You heard Jihoon as he called down the hall, passing the door. Someone responded but it was muffled. “Okay well no one else wants to cook!” 

You didn’t like that, frowning at his words. There had been a larger amount of fast food for dinner, but lunch was always something homemade from what you could tell. Were they not taking care of themselves because of you? Your frown grew wider. 

“We need to stop eating out as much…” Cheol passed the door as well, huffing. 

“Oh, are you going to cook?” Jihoon laughed. “I don’t want food poisoning again. No, thanks.” 

Their presence right outside, shuffling about, had you taking a step back and sitting on the bed, sighing quietly. 

Face your uncomfortability. Telling yourself that was easier said than done. You can do it!  

You had a sinking feeling in your stomach, it made you nauseous and dizzy. Staring at the door, your nails dug into your palms, sucking in a slow, deep breath. Nodding, you stood and walked towards the door, only to chicken out when your hand reached for the knob. You were getting the anxious itches, wishing to claw your skin off and start anew. 

Then you paced…and paced…and paced…and sat back down, defeated and unhappy with yourself. 

Wait, you fucking idiot! Light bulb moment. 

Looking around, you found your phone in the pile of blankets. One of them had given it to you when bringing food, saying to text them if you needed anything. It had been on do not disturb and you were anxiously ignoring the hundreds of messages between group chats and solo chats, asking how you were doing. 

You scolded and scrolled until you found Jihoon’s contact name in your phone. 

[To Cat Boi 4 12:44 PM]  If you get burgers…can I have cheese fries? 

Waiting for his reply, your leg bounced and you continued to hear quiet conversation in the living room. Someone walked back passed the room, maybe Cheol by the footsteps, then a faster, hurried set of steps followed, probably Jihoon. 

[Cat Boi 4 12:51 PM]  Only if you accept an ultimatum Oh, this fucker… You replied quickly.  [To Cat Boi 4 12:52 PM]  Depends… [Cat Boi 4 12:53 PM]  You need to come get it yourself when it gets here.

You clenched your jaw. This sneaky bastard, you knew that was going to be it but it was a decent push you needed. It would be your starting point, albeit one you would stress over, but a start! 

[To Cat Boi 4 12:59 PM]  Add a milkshake and it’s a deal.

You could hear Jihoon laugh and Seungkwan asked what was so funny. 

[Cat Boi 4 1:01 PM]  Deal. Thanks for doing business.  I’ll text you when it's here so I’m holding you to it.

You sent him a middle finger emoji and a melting face emoji.

[To Cat Boi 4 1:03 PM] I hate you So much  [Cat Boi 4 1:01 PM] Wrong, what do you want for lunch? [To Cat Boi 4 1:03 PM] Not hungry. I’ll eat later

Tossing your phone aside, you laid back and groaned, staring helplessly at the ceiling. 

You had a few hours to mentally prepare to go out there. The thought had nervous butterflies fluttering in your stomach. However, you were determined to do it, determined to take a good first, small step forward. Though…there was most likely no want you’d be able to sit with them at the table. They’d be too close and a good chance they’d be too loud, which was a hard pass. Maybe sitting on the couch and eating was a good idea.

You’ll figure it out, you typically do.

[Cat Boi 4 7:19 PM] It’s here

You could hear the commotion of meal time in the house. Seokmin, though not as enthusiastic as he usually was, announced he was home with food, sending the rest into a frenzy.  You heard the clatter of plates and the low murmur of conversation. It seemed Jihoon had texted you after they settled, but they were still talking. This was one of the dinners where you heard all of them together.

Did you believe you were prepared enough to face them? Maybe. You spent hours mentally preparing for it. You rehearsed a million answers to different questions they might ask, thought of a few escape answers, and told yourself it was okay to be overwhelmed and leave the room.

Standing at the door, you placed your hand on the doorknob, swallowing down your nerves for a moment. 

You got this. You repeated a few times, staring at the handle blankly. 

Quietly, you opened it and peeked into the hallway, sucking in a deep breath. Fixing Joshua’s sweatshirt, you gripped the cuffs of it and slowly made your way down the hall. 

“Do you think she will actually come out?” Chan’s voice broke the moment of silence.

Jihoon sighed. “I’m hoping. The ultimatum was more of a joke but I have some faith she will.” 

“I love you guys, but I miss Mouse.” Mingyu huffed and it sounded like he grumbled around some food. 

“We can’t pressure her,” Seungcheol spoke next and you stopped, placing yourself against the wall. “While we don’t know the full extent of everything currently, she is hurting, recovering, and trying to make sense of the trauma. We know the process, we’ve gone through it a few different times, but everyone copes differently. Mouse could still be refiguring out what being safe is. It might have only been a few days for her with who hurt her, but it could feel like a thousand.” 

You didn’t realize you were holding your breath until you leaned your head back against the wall. It came out shaky and strained, an uneasy feeling bubbling in your chest. 

Don’t let this stop you. You scolded yourself, biting your bottom lip. It’s already one stop forward and two steps back, but you need to take at least one stop to start.

“Should I put her milkshake in the freezer-?” Vernon looked over at it as you entered the area. 

“No-” Your voice was rough, hesitant, and all of their gazes set on you instantly. Clearing your throat, you averted your eyes. “I got it.” 

Flicking your eyes up, you met a few of their stares, half rooted in place. You knew the bruising on your face was still a little yellowish from Nightmare hitting you. The handprint bruising on your neck from Joker’s strangulation was in a similar stage of healing. You didn’t look good, but it wasn’t as rough as when they first saw you for sure. In their eyes, you might be viewed as even more broken and bruised, small, and in need of care.

You watched as Cheol quickly grabbed Jeonghan and Joshua by the back of their shirts, stopping them from moving. Both your boyfriends looked just about ready to jump up and pounce on you. They looked relieved and eyes weren’t as dull, but the way they held themselves back showed they knew you were struggling. 

“Do you need-” Jeonghan stared wide eyed and you shook your head. 

“No, I got it.” You took a deep breath, willing yourself not to turn back. “Just continue eating, please.” 

You took the long way into the kitchen to avoid getting too close, stopping at the kitchen island where your food rested. They were still staring and you ignored them to the best of your abilities as you grabbed a plate, piling your burger and fries on to it. Looking over to the table, you see your usual seat with a plate and napkin set, vacant and looming. Even the thought of sitting there was numbing. 

You made eye contact with Jeonghan, looking so hopefully, a spark of joy in his eyes. Joshua looked similar, a small, timid smile on his lips. Really, all of them held an expression of pride, which had your stomach doing somersaults. 

“Do you want to sit there?” Minghao broke the silence and the flash of panic that crossed your face was enough for him to give you a somber smile.

“I don’t think I can…and I think I’d like to keep my dinner down instead of having a panic attack.” That came out a lot harsher than you wanted and your heart started to beat faster. “Wait- No, I’m sorry-” 

“It’s okay.” Seungcheol spoke softly and your heart broke a little, “Do you want your chair at least?” 

Picking up your plate and drink, you shook your head and went to the couch, curling up in a corner and eating quietly. 

“Alright, back to the original conversation I wanted,” Soonyoung spoke up and a wave of groans were heard behind you. “Which Disney Princess do you think should have been gay?”

Joshua sighed. “Mulan.” 

“That is such a basic bitch answer.” Soonyoung scoffed. “Give me something better.”

Vernon laughed, wheezing some as he did. “My answer is Sleeping Beauty or Merida.” 

“Thank you, Vernon.” 

You couldn’t stop the little chuckle that came out. 

Mingyu snickered. “Ariel shouldn’t have ended up with Eric. He was too…Bland.” 

“Violet from The Incredibles should have also been gay.” The low rumble of Wonwoo’s voice made you scoff. 

Soonyoung groaned. “I said Disney, not Pixar.”

“Nah, let him cook. Pixar is basically Disney at this point, right? He isn’t wrong either.” 

“And Elastigirl should have left what’s-his-face for the not-so-mean lesbian in the second movie.” 

You flinched at the uproar from Mingyu, Soonyoung, and – most surprising – Jun. They argued over more princesses and movie characters, but despite the flinching a few times one and a while from when they got loud, it was okay. It was a decent change to eating with people rather than in the dark in a bedroom alone, even if you weren’t sitting with them. 

Placing your plate aside when finished, you curled up more with your mostly finished milkshake and noticed your eyes getting heavy. Taking a deep breath in, it felt nice to be tired. You only wondered if you’d be able to get some proper rest. 

“Mouse, you could hand me your plate or I can grab it, whichever you are more comfortable with.” Joshua could be heard behind you, maybe a few feet away, but thankfully made himself known before approaching. 

Peering over the back of the couch sleepily, you grabbed the plate and handed it over, half hidden behind the couch. When he took it quietly and stepped away, you stood and shuffled to the loveseat to watch them move about quietly. They all worked quietly to clean up, keeping their voices low. Sometimes they’d look over to you and look away with haste when you met their gaze. 

You tugged a blanket over the back of the seat and wrapped yourself up, falling comfortably into your side. Your eyes continued to grow heavy, your breathing evening out, and you quickly drifted into much needed sleep.

“That can not be comfortable.” Chan frowned, staring over at Mouse.

Seungcheol puffed out some air, giving a small shake of his head. “Definitely not, but she is asleep. Who knows the last time she got proper sleep.” 

Mouse, as of current, was curled up and contorted in a rather…interesting sleeping position. He had watched her go from curled up under the blanket to one leg off the love seat, hanging oddly, her neck craned weird, and both arms curled up where she would definitely be sore tomorrow. The blanket was half on the floor and no one was stupid enough to get close and fix it. 

“She’s been asleep for at least an hour, we should properly wake her up.” Joshua hummed, pouting over at her. 

“And how do you plan on doing that?” Wonwoo snorted, raising his brow and lowering his phone. “She can sleep like a rock when she wants or needs to.”

“Do you think she will wake up if I scream?” Mingyu  asked. 

“Do not. I’ll beat your ass.” Cheol rolled his eyes. “I don’t want a headache.” 

“Touching her is out of the question.” Jeonghan frowned at his girlfriend’s sleeping form, huffing quietly. 

Sighing, Seungcheol pinched the bridge of his nose. “Why wake her up? Just let her sleep whenever she gets comfortable.” 

“She should be sleeping in a bed-” Jeonghan went to argue, only to back down when Seungcheol glared at him. 

“Don’t wake her up. Don’t bother her. And do not touch her, any of you.” His eyes shifted around to those in the room. “And if you do, and cause her any further discomfort, I’ll have you on clean up duty for a long time.” 

Most averted his gaze after, knowing clean up was the worst punishment if Cheol had a say in it. Last time someone didn’t listen – Soonyoung – he was told to personally clean up drug dens, body fluids, and more, until the leader was satisfied. There were plenty of different clean up jobs Cheol could place them on if he pleased, much worse than then the drug dens. 

“So if it’s an accident…” Mingyu started and Wonwoo hit him in the arm. 

“Shut up.”

“It’s a valid question!” 

“Don’t dig yourself a hole, ‘Gyu.” Minghao stopped him, shaking his head. “You won’t win any argument here.’ 

The tall man puffed, crossed his arms over his chest, grumbling about how no one was standing up with him. 

“Yet you keep talking.” Seokmin smirked, stepping back into the living room after leaving for a while. “Cheol, can we talk?” 

Raising a brow, he nodded and stood, looking to the rest. “Don’t bother her.” 

Someone repeated him with annoyance in his tone (it was Jeonghan, he knew it), but ignored him to trail down the hall to his office, kicking the door open for Seokmin and plopped down on one of the couches. There was a concerned frown on Seokmin’s face as he sat opposite of Seungcheol, a look not often seen on the other man’s face. 

“What’s up?” 

Seokmin stared down at his lap then sighed, leaning back. “I’m…going to put in my notice to work on Monday.” 

“Okay,” Cheol nodded his head. “Can I know why we are moving it up?”

“I can’t keep faking it anymore.” Seokmin pushed his hair back and slumped his shoulders. “Every other hour I’m getting question after question about Mouse or why she is gone. Because it’s an indefinite leave, there are now a lot of rumors in the office too. It’s starting to eat away at me more and I can’t stay any longer for my own sanity. We should probably look into a notice for her too. If Mouse went back, I don’t think she’ll be able to handle the rumors and hounding. She can get another-” 

“Sounds fair.” Cheol knew it wouldn’t last forever with the double life, but he was surprised it lasted as long as it did. “Monday, you put in the notice to leave and I’ll try – or someone will try – to talk to Mouse about this too.” 

The relief that washed over Seokmin was instant, his shoulders relaxed and a murmured work of gratitude slipped out.

“But don’t think you’ll be doing nothing now, I’ll find more stuff for you to do.” Cheol teased and Seokmin grinned wide. 

“Wouldn’t put it past you, boss.” His shoulders shook happily with a quiet chuckle. “Thank you for understanding.” 

“Don’t thank me, it isn’t a problem.” Seungcheol waved it off and stood, nodding towards the door. “Head on out of here, I’m going to get some work done I’ve been putting off.” 

‘I’ll make sure no one bothers her~” 

“I didn’t-” He went to continue but Seokmin wiggled his eyebrows, halting his words in disbelief. 

“Don’t need to, lover boy.” And he left quickly, leaving laughter in his trail. 

Okay, Seungcheol knew his feelings for Mouse were still prevalent. He also knew that he was originally going to feel out a chance of a relationship before the shit show. Did he look a little love sick? Maybe. He had been staying home the most to make sure Mouse was okay. Cheol had that luxury that the other’s didn’t always have. 

“Focus.” He reminded himself, sighing. “No lovesick brain right now.”

You stirred, taking a deep breath in as you came to consciousness. 

Your neck hurt some and both of your arms had fallen asleep from how they were curled up. It took a moment for you to open your eyes, eyebrows furrowing together when met with the dimly lit living room. 

By the sun being fully set and the silence in the house, you guessed it was late. The house was so quiet – or well, kinda quiet with the snore that ripped through the air. 

Lifting your head, you found Seungcheol laying on the couch across from you, a blanket thrown over his lower half and a pillow hugged to his chest. His snoring was soft, but it was the only major sound in the living room.  His lips were parted and his eyebrows were furrowed together, stirring some. 

You sat up, stretching properly with a pang of pain in your side from your ribs, feeling the popping of your joints with each movement. It was the first peaceful sleep you’ve had since coming back, you didn’t know how long you slept but at least you did sleep. You weren’t as tired as you were before. You didn’t dream either, which you were also taking as a win. No dream was better than nightmares.

“You’re up?” 

Seungcheol’s voice had your head snapping to meet his gaze. He was frowning at you haphazardly, ruffling his hair back and out of his face. You stared at him for a moment, tugging the blanket you had around you.

“Yeah, did I wake you?” You whispered. 

He shook his head. “Not really, but you shifted and I woke up. Think I was napping more than anything.” 

“Your snoring said otherwise.” You teased and a yawn bubbled out. 

Cheol grumbled as the yawn came from him next, pouting once settled. 

The two of you sat in silence for a few minutes, adjusting to being awake. You took note of the state of the living room; things thrown about messily, the Christmas tree still up, and a majority of the presents surrounding it. Seungcheol sat up, eyes unfocused as he yawned against, coming back to the proper plane of existence. 

“Do you need anything?”  He tilted his head curiously, scratching at his neck. “Anything I could do for you?” 

You did say you’d try and pawn some laundry off on one of them…

When you asked for the favor to at least have help throwing the sheets and blankets in the wash, he was up and leaving the area in an instant. You could hear the quiet pitter-patter of his feet on the floor, treading wherever needed. Cheol promises they would be washed and ready by tomorrow for you to take back. 

Then he sat down once more, twiddling his thumbs like he wanted to say something but was unsure of himself or his words. You gave him a moment to attempt to speak up, seeing him lost in thought, and when he didn’t, you extended an olive branch. 

“What’s on your mind?” 

He whipped his head up, eyes wide before he dropped his gaze and cleared his throat. 

“I know you probably have a lot going on in your thoughts and physical recovery. But I want you to know that I’m always around if you want to chat. We’d like to help you however you’d let us.” 

Cheol looked up again, those stupid, big sparkly eyes staring across the way to you. He was waiting for your answer and your stomach twisted with uncertainty. You opened your mouth to speak, letting a flood of unsure thoughts choke you up. A sound left your throat, you wanted to say something- 

“This was the first time in days that I slept without a nightmare.” Was all you managed to get out. You breathed in deep, blinking away tears. “Things are difficult. Motivation is shot, and I’m exhausted, Cheol.” 

Your tone was riddled with defeat and pain, over all of the self-doubt and fear you couldn’t escape. 

Seungcheol dropped his shoulders, a sympathetic smile gracing his lips. He waited to see if you’d continue but signed when you didn’t. “I’m sorry things have been hard at this time. There is nothing I can probably do or say that will help that. You’ve lost so much independence and safety. No one will understand that fear of your situation more than yourself. However, no one will rush you, you take as long as you need and we will walk with you to help. All we want to see is you get better…When Rheia was here, she mentioned a therapist she had in mind you could take to, would you consider it?” 

You nodded, knowing you needed someone to treat you unbiased and medically for your trauma. “I think it might be a good idea.” 

He nodded along with you. “I’ll get the info from her and you can do it all at your own pace, okay?”

“Thank you, Cheol, for everything. I mean it.” 

Clicking his tongue, he shook his head. “Don’t thank me for that, Mouse. I want you to get better for yourself first and foremost.”

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AN:

Hi, I know I've been sporadic with posting BSH here on Tumblr, not from lack of love, but more because I'm trying to finish BSH!! I am still actively writing it, literally I work on it almost every waking moment I can. The only issue is...when writing longer chapters, It takes more type to read through, edit, etc.

I'm going to post on here until I catch up to the Ao3 posting (chapter 44) then after that, it will be in time with each chapter on Ao3 until I finish! I'll make sure to put dates of next chapters in the top of the previous chapter and also in the Master List.

I'm sorry for any inconvenience!! I hope you stick around and enjoy Blood Stained Hands <3

[frostbittenfemme]

It doesn't take long for Winter to make her way through a good majority of her breakfast. Eating fast was a skill that's stayed with her since being in med school, either you eat fast or not at all.

Soon the peaceful atmosphere in the kitchen is interrupted by two rambunctious parrots coming chattering through the open hatch above the door. Just as Winter attempts to warn Viktor, Sprocket is first to announce his presence by screeching as loud as possible. Winter winces at the noise and clicks her fingers, momentarily silencing the smaller grey parrot. "Sprocket here." She calls, prompting him to fly over and land beside her. "Be nice, he is a guest."

Sprocket sticks his black tongue out at Viktor and blows a raspberry, wasting no time in letting the man know what he thinks. "Fuck off." He squawks.

Winter sighs and rubs at her temple. "Sorry, he's always had an attitude problem." She apologises, opting to try and hide her embarrassment by eating more of her breakfast.

Content he has made his opinion known Sprocket turns his attention to some of the fruit treats, occupying himself with those. Meanwhile Echo takes a quieter and more friendlier approach, flapping her wings a few times before flying over to the table and landing beside Viktor. For a few moments she simply stares at Viktor, her pupils pinpointing and dilating as she lets out a few curious trills, trying to determine who this strange man is.

After she's decided he's not a threat the large red parrot lets out a chorus of 'Hello's and Hi's' as she approaches his hand, trying to rub her beak and head against him.

"She's a fusspot, and wants you to stroke her." Winter informs, sipping her coffee. "Just her head and neck though, otherwise you'll make her horny." A strange thing she didn't think she'd say to a man she barely knows.

Winter goes quiet, focusing on stroking at some of the feathers atop Sprocket's head as she contemplates Viktor's question. It's not a topic anyone has ever asked her before and while she knows the answer she take a moment to figure out how to word it. "George was my first. He was my 13th birthday gift from my dad so I've had him since I was little." A little smile appears on her face as she remembers the day she got him. He was only tiny back then, the size of a small rock in her palm.

"I didn't get the others until after I was discharged." Winter adds, looking down at Sprocket who is now preening himself. "You don't realise just how quiet coming home is in comparison to the noise of the military. The silence is just.. deafening." She admits. If anyone can understand its the former navy seal sat in front of her.

"So I went and bought the most chaotic of animals I could think of and that's how I ended up with ferrets and parrots. Noisy and problematic but I wouldn't want them any other way." That and they're much easier to deal with than people. She thinks to herself.

"No not Zaggles! He's my favourite furry son." Winter gasps, watching as Horatio runs away to find something to steal. "Sorry Horatio I love you too." The ferret paying her no attention to his owner. Where one ferret goes the other follows and it wasn't long before Zaggles wiggled his way out from Viktors clothing, down onto his lap before jumping to the floor and running after his cage mate.

"Well thats.. a different way to refer to it I suppose." It takes her a few moments to comprehend how someone can function without coffee, she's not even certain she remembers a time where she wasn't chasing some form of caffeine fix. "Anything I can get you to drink? " She asks, scoruing her cupboards and fridge to see what she has to offer. "I have orange juice, hot chocolate, milk.. or apparently whiskey." Winters adds as she pulls a half empty bottle of whiskey from the cupboard. Huh that's where that went. She thinks to herself.

Before she joins her guest Winter grabs some a bag of dried fruit from the cupboard and places it next to Viktor. "You will need to arm yourself with these soon or enemies will be made." She warns rather cryptically, refusing to elaborate as she sits opposite him.

Winter watches as Viktor takes off his mask, but she's quick to turn her attention to cutting up her pancakes instead, not wanting to make him uncomfortable. It's not like she hasn't seen burn scars before; she's seen plenty but part of her will always be curious about inspecting wounds both old and new just to see how serious it is or how its healed like a moth is attracted to a flame.

"Did you sleep ok?" Winter questions between mouthfuls, her gaze flitting from her plate to the open hatch above the door. Any moment now she's waiting for two feathered beasts to barge their way in demanding treats despite having just ate breakfast.

[nexus-nebulae]

just realised that the first media we consumed that made us REALLY sympathetic for the monster was that fucking point and click Mystery Case Files Ravenhearst game. bc that entire game i was legitimately fucking TERRIFIED of the ghost lady in that game but the second i found out her husband was abusive i doubled down on trying to help her escape. and the ending of that game Did make me cry out of fear but hey at least i did in fact help her escape