writingroom21

[writingroom21]

I loved this so much❤️

BEACH DATE | Rafe x Pogue!Reader

✧ MASTERLIST | TAGLIST

✧ Summary: A day at the beach with Rafe goes incredibly right.

✧ Warnings: MDNI 18+, public sex, unprotected sex, oral (f receiving), missionary, cream pie

✧ 2.8k words

✧ A.N- surprise I lied I’m back. Also I hate this but what matters to me more is that you do and I hope getting this notification excited you. I planned to have this out a couple of days ago but I just kept going back and changing things, adding more to it<3

Also please let know if you’d like to continue being tagged. I know I’m not good or active anymore. So absolutely feel free to leave.

You spent the entire day with Rafe, hidden on a secluded part of the beach. You had woken up at the Chateau, lying to JJ and Pope about where you were going on your way out. Rafe had done the same, lying to his friends saying he'd be on the mainland, completing a job for his dad. The fallout that would come from your relationship being revealed always lingered in the back of your mind. But in moments like this, where the world shrunk to it just being the two of you in the fight and hateful words, and the rivalry all disappeared, it seemed so minuscule.

In this very moment, you were floating on your back in the middle of the water as it gently rocked against you. The warmth of the sun, peaking through the gray of the clouds, kissing your skin gave you a sense of peace. The sounds of the waves crashing at the shore and the calls of the seagulls kept you grounded. The smell of the salt water surrounding you made you calm, a reminder of how free and weightless you felt out here.

Your attention was stolen for a split second when you heard a tread of water. Then you felt it… his touch. Rafe’s two big hands coming from behind you and making home on your stomach as his arms wrapped around your waist, pulling you into him. His head nuzzled in the crook of your neck, the scruff on his cheek rubbed against the softness of yours. Both of your eyes close, enjoying the serene moment.

You never thought in a million lifetimes that this one would bring you two together. Literally. Being here on the beach, wrapped in his arms. Two people from completely different situations, different sides of the island. Rafe's hatred of Pogues was always loud. Everyone knew it. All his friends did too. A Kook and a Pogue were never meant to mix, let alone fall in love.

You found it weird when your heart would start to race when he was around. Simultaneously throwing jabs at your friends while looking into your eyes and having them soften. His hatred never touched you. People on both sides of the island somewhat feared him. He was a Cameron. An untouchable. You were different for him. Bright eyes, big heart, caring, kind. All the things he wasn’t and he silently adored you until he caught you alone restocking at Midsummers.

“Nice, huh?”

The rare softness of his voice pulled you from your thoughts. “Really nice.” You smiled and melted back into him.

There was a slight hesitation from him. You heard him take a deep breath. “I love you, y'know?" His face turned as he pressed his lips to your skin. Placing gentle kisses behind your ear and down your neck. “Let me show you how much.”

His hold on you loosened a bit when you lifted yourself up and spun around in the water to face him. Arms wrapping around his neck and legs around his waist. His hands instinctively found their place right under your thighs. Your eyes met his, making his heart race in his chest. Breath caught in his through. All just from looking at you.

The space in between the two of you closed as you leaned in to kiss him. His hands now knead the flesh of your ass. His grip was somehow firm but gentle. He walked backwards through the water making his way towards the shallow end, carrying you with him.

His footsteps kicked up sand as he brought you to the far end of the beach. Laying you down on the rocky floor of a small cove that sits in the corner. The water laps up against it, leaving a cool bed underneath you relieving the heat that’s pooling inside of you. Rafe hovers over you peppering kisses down your neck as he settles in between your legs.

You don’t know why, but being in this position with him, an overheard conversation popped into your head, during a time like this you wish you could stop yourself, but you couldn’t help but speak. “I heard Topper and Kelce calling me a pogue slut yesterday and that the boys probably just pass me around.”

A flicker of something flashes through his eyes, something of fury..? but it was too quick to tell. Maybe a realization of the reality of your relationship. Of all the things it could be, but all the things that prevent it from getting to that point.

His head dips and his lips graze your ear, “the only time that you’re a slut,” his voice was low and raspy, “is when I have you bent in half, begging me to let you cum.”

His tongue drew a line around the curve of your earlobe, sending shivers down your spine. Without another word, his body slivered down yours, positioning himself just in the spot you needed him the most.

He lazily toyed with the strings of your bikini while his tongue worked on the skin of your thighs. His teeth grazed them, biting into it just softly enough for you to react, but not enough to leave a mark. Finally, untangling the bows, he pulled the bottoms away. He used his hand to spread you open more. A low growl escaped his throat and he licked his lips at the sight. His pupils blow, dark and predatory. Like a lion on a hunt. Not a sight of blue left in them. It was like he was about to enjoy his last meal.

You sat up on your elbows to get a better view of him. Your eyes were locked onto each other. He brought his hand up to your mouth, slipping his thumb between your lips and pressing it against your tongue. You took it in, swirling your tongue around it, getting it all wet, releasing it with a pop as he pulled it out. Without breaking eye contact, he takes his thumb and presses it against your clit. Your clit, that's already throbbing from the pleasure, he teases it with soft and barely there circles. Watching how just this small thing can make your eyes roll back.

“Dripping baby.” giving just a little more pressure, making you let out a gasp and your hips jerk. “You like that?”

“Fuck yes,” you breathed out as his thumb disappeared from you and was replaced with his tongue. He licked in between your folds, from bottom to top with one deliberate stroke, collecting every ounce of your arousal on his tongue.

His lips formed a suction around your clit and his tongue swirled against it. Your back arched and your fingers tangled in his hair gripping at it to pull him in closer as if it was possible. Moans fell out of your mouth unintentionally. He was perfect at this, fuck was he perfect. He knew exactly what he was doing. Like making you feel good was a natural skill of his. His hands held you in place as you squirmed before one hand slipped away and you felt his fingers beneath you attempting to lather them in your juices.

Then you felt them swirl around your entrance, teasing your edge. Your heart was racing with anticipation. Finally, one finger pressed in. Slowly, stroking the walls as he went deeper and deeper. A gasp left your lips from the stretch. You clenched around him instantly. You shuddered as you felt his large silver ring brush against you. It sends a jolt through your body. It was cold and shocking against your sensitive skin. The complete opposite of how you felt.

“Rafe, shit,” your eyes rolled back hard.

His mouth never left you. He hummed against you. Clearly pleased with the effect he had over you. His tongue moved with more urgency and his lips pulled a tighter hold on you. His finger curled inside of you, hitting the perfect spot over and over. It all felt like too much, your back lifted and hips moved with it. His arm that was still around your thigh moved to your waist, bringing your body back down and pinning you to the ground. He didn't want you getting away from him and he made sure of it. Even with him focused on another part of you, you were no match for his strength.

A second finger joinde the first. The stretch is full force. The split between pain and pleasure in the best way possible. Your body tenses for a split second before you relax into his again, opening for him wider. It gives his ring a better angle to rub against you more. It scraped against your hole, causing you to let out a whimper. You feel yourself getting closer. You feel like your stomach has been set aflame. Your nails dig into his scalp. Your breath came out in shallow spurts as it was impossible to catch. He kept going and going until he stopped. Mouth abandoning your clit, fingers pulled away from you. He was evil, super sexy hot, but really fucking evil. You tried to buck your hips up to follow him, but his hand gently pushed you back down as he shook his head and let out a breathy laugh.

“Don’t get to come yet.” He kneeled, beginning to tug down his swim shorts. His cock sprang free, thick and throbbing. Already dripping with precum. “Gonna fuck you, til you shake, fill you up with my cum and fuck that right back into you.”

Ecstasy surged through your body. Your body was begging for him to give you more. You reached up for him pulling him down with you so he was flush against your body. Pressing your lips to his, you opened them slightly inviting his tongue to tangle with yours. He adjusted slightly, pulling back and stroking himself as he lined up with you. You could feel his tip touch you. He pushed in as his other hand tugged your top down freeing your breasts from the confined material. His mouth met with your left nipple, biting down on it then soothing out the burn with his tongue.

He slid in and out with a precision only he could master. Each inch of him sent you into a haze. It was magical. Every thrust hit you deep, hitting every sensitive part. You moved to meet his pace, wanted more but he wasn’t giving in just yet. He wanted to just feel you for a moment. Take it all in.

“That feel good, baby?”

“M-more, Rafe.” Your voice broke on the request. You couldn’t take it anymore, you needed him like you needed oxygen. He was the only man you’d ever been with that rough and hard was good. He could bend you in any position and it would always feel amazing. Him unraveling you in the way that he did, felt like it was a gift every time. It felt like your body was made to be under his.

With that, he gave a satisfied smirk and sat up. He grabbed the back of your knees, pulling your legs over his shoulders leaning back down, so your legs were up and spread wide. You blushed at being so exposed and this just made his smirk grow wider. His hands came to either side of your face. You were now nose to nose. His thumb brushed against your cheek. Making this moment feel sentimental.

“You can take more?”

You nodded, “please.”

His hips lifted and he slammed back into you. It was a ruthless thrust, knocking all the air from your lungs. Your eyes squeezed shut and you threw your head back. The angle made his cock hit all the right places. Your arms reached up, needing a place to hold. The wrapped around his wrists, gripping them as hard as he was fucking you. His hand slipped up, yours still around it, and his finger laid around your throat, giving it a little squeeze.

“Eyes on me.”

They flashed open staring back into his. Your breath was caught in your throat. Your legs burned from the stretch. Your stomach ached from squeezing it. Your clit was swollen and throbbing. You clenched around Rafe’s cock, making it almost impossible for him to move, but he broke through your walls with ease due to his pace. It was all so overwhelming. Overwhelmingly good. You could do this thing with him forever.

“Fuck, look at you. You're a damn perfect mess. S’ fucking tight. S’ good for me. Sucking in my cock like that.”

You had no response. There was absolutely no way for you to even get words out even if you tried. Your mouth hung open. You were breathless and seething with pleasure. The only sounds that came from you were moans and gasps trying to catch your breath. The sting of your back rubbing against the rough texture of the ground had no effect on you as he pushed in and out of you. The rocks dug into you, your body could feel every bit of texture, gravel and speck of dirt. But your mind was on him.

You clutched at his arms, needing the feeling of holding onto something. You swore he could throw you across the cove with a single thrust if he wanted to. His head hung low, your tits bounced in his face. Beads of sweat dropped from his forehead onto them. He was grunting loudly. His thrusts only picked up and became more frenzied. Your brain was wiped clean. He was quite literally fucking you dumb and you didn’t give a shit about it.

There’s that one high pitched whimper that leaves your mouth, it comes straight from the throat, and he knew. He always knew. You do it every time. You’re just about to tip over the edge. Your legs tremble around his head. Your thighs burn as you prevent them from completely closing in on him.

“Cum for me baby. Let it go.” His speed picks up to help you just a bit.

Your body convulses as your orgasm ripped through you. Every muscle in your body tighten. Your nails dig into Rafe's skin, you're surprised you didn’t draw any blood. Moans fall from your throat, the noises are raspy now. Rafe's moves don’t let up. He continues to thrust into you chasing his own high.

He finally does, grunts and moans leave his mouth and as stops, buried deep inside of you. His own body slightly trembling from release. You can feel him fill you. He takes a second to press a kiss on your lips before sitting up to take a look at you.

He watches his cum slowly leak from you. It was thick, white, and slow. Licking his lips and stroking your thigh. It’s his stake of claim on you. He knows no one has every fucked you this way before, and now that he’s had you, he knows no one else will ever get the chance.

You’re his. Not in a sense of ownership. A sense that he’s completely and utterly in love with you and he never wants to lose that. It’s irreversible now. You both had given so much of yourselves to each other. There’s no possible way to go back or separate from here.

You lay there catching your breath. Deep breaths in and long exhales out. Staring at him, staring at you, both in admiration.

Then, without warning, he pushes inside you again.

“Told you,” his head is thrown back as you gasp, he grits through his teeth. “I was gonna fuck the cum right back into you.”

He pumped into you at a steady pace. The squelching sound of the mess he’s making fills your ears, even over the waves. You could feel everything happening. His hips smacking against yours. Every inch of him. The heavy breathing coming from the two of you. Both of your cum mixing, coating his length. The way he looked at you when he was doing all of this was enough to almost send you over the edge again.

When he was satisfied, he slowed again, still inside you. He lowered his body weight onto you caressing your cheek and softly kissing your lips. A complete 180 from moments ago. Now he holds you like you're fragile. That’s what you loved most about him.

Times like these are when everything disappears. The pogues, the kooks. The looks you get from people you don’t even know. None of that mattered. Not when you got to be with him, here like this.

Shell divider possibly made by @v6que

TAGS!! + some of my girlies

@rafestoothbrush @weluvwbb @itsforeverandalwayz @butterfly-ibuki @megiiite @siredbtches @bigenergy777 @aupernatural-teenwolflover @rafegf-real @skywalker0809 @snowtargaryen @kieeslove @leather-n-velvet @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @diasnohibng @slurpdew @alphabetically-deranged @runawayrafetrain @currentresidentinhell @jenna0rtegaswife @slut-4-rafey @akobx @laniirackssss @jjmaybankmylovee @slut4you @larema121 @sc05 @k4yr14 @chromeheartsbaby @jennieonline @vaelyann @rafeyy @jenna0rtegaswife @httpsdrewstarkey @rafesteddy @inthelibrarybtw @writingroom21 @maybankslover

[writingroom21]

baby u just feed my glory hole fantasy thank u

You are very welcome🫶

[writingroom21]

Imagine reader a shy sweet inexperienced girl who has never went to a party as a friend forces her to tag along as there is a glory hole somewhere as Rafe inserts his cock in the hole as he’s never done this before as it’s a dare, reader doesn’t know it’s Rafe her long time bully he even bullies her still even in college. Plz plz plz make this extra smutty

Glory

Pairing: Bully!Rafe x reader

Warnings: 18+, smut, unprotected sex, deep throating, slapping, branding, (let me know if I missed any)

Wc:4.5K

A/N: Kinda got carried away with this one

“Could you stop looking like a kicked puppy. You’re acting like I made you come here at gun point.” You try not to roll your eyes as you follow your best friend into the house. People say hi to here and give you a once over before turning away. Great. “You practically did.” Melanie, your best friend, turns around to look at you. One of her manicured hands wraps around yours to pull you into an empty hallway. “If you want we can go back home.” The look on her face tells you she wants to stay.

Knowing her your whole life has its plus. You can see the sparkle in her eyes meaning she’s ready to party. You sigh and shake your head. “No you’re right. I need to put myself out there.” Her eyes get a bit brighter at your words. “Maybe getting out of the house is what I need.” She hugs you tightly. “Thank you.” Her happiness is enough to make you get through the rest of this night. You can get over yourself for one night.

Melanie drags you to the drinks table shoving a solo cup into your empty hands. Taking a sip, you cough at the taste, hating how it burns. The party seems to get louder with people yelling. That’s when you sense it. There’s a shift in the air and everything gets cold. “Actually I want to go back. I forgot I have a project I need to finish.” You don’t listen because you turn around and your eyes meet his. The same eyes that haunt all of your dreams. The same ones that broke you. Rafe Cameron stands there staring at you with a stupid smirk. Melanie pulls your hand drawing your attention to her. “Let’s just go.”

“I’m okay.”

She doesn’t really believe you. She dragged you out of the darkness he created. She knows how you truly feel. “I don’t want you near him.” Melanie maneuvers you out of the second kitchen door just as he came in. “It was a long time ago. Plus he’s left me alone since then.” Liar. You can’t tell you that he follows you in between classes just to mock you. That when he catches you talking to any guy he tells them how much of a ‘desperate bitch’ you are. Those words still haunt you to this day.

“Are you really that desperate to think I’d go for you? If me telling you how disgusting you are every day wasn’t clear enough – you are nothing. You’ll never be nothing.”

“We’ll leave whenever you want, okay?” Nodding along you try to ignore his presence. After a while you genuinely did. One drink turned into four and you finally felt free. It’s a feeling you haven’t felt since middle school. Because that’s when it started. Great, you’re thinking about him. The dress you wear rides up a bit as you sway along to the music. A body slides up behind you, hands finding your hips. Opening your eyes, you see Greg from your creative writing class. You smile up at him and turn around to throw your arms around his neck. 

Greg is the only guy that hasn’t run away from Rafe’s lies. The rest all fled at his horrendous stories of how you threw yourself at him. As if embarrassing you in front of the whole class in high school wasn’t enough. All of your humiliation seems to be the only thing that brings Rafe joy. It started in sixth grade when he realized you had a crush on him. You had grown up together so both of you knew everything about each other. Which means he knew exactly what could hurt you. And he did right in front of everyone in the hallway between classes. You had excused his rude words and mocking tone for so long. Hoping it was him still being hurt about what happened with his parents. But senior year sealed the deal.

Rafe Cameron just hates you.

Hatred is the only word that could describe it. The same hatred that stares at you as you dance with your friend. Tracking Greg’s hands as they guide up and down your sides. You watch him with a confused look not knowing why he’s even watching you. He made it clear you’re nothing to him, so why is he looking? The music around you picks up and strobe lights start to glow. Each flicker of the lights gives you a brief moment of him. Blackness envelopes you and then there he is staring. You keep dancing with Greg trying to ignore his presence. Then blackness envelopes you again but when you look back he’s closer. His eyes burn into yours every time the lights come back on.

Every drop of the lights draws him closer to you. Every muscle in your body is screaming for you to give Greg an excuse and just leave. But you don’t. Then just when you think he’s about to come for you there’s nothing. He was one step from you. The lights had gone out just to come back to show the crowded bodies. But no Rafe. You finally breathe, thankful that he didn’t ruin this.

Each song that plays cracks your resolve making you feel loose. It’s possible it’s all due to the alcohol but who cares. You lost Melanie a few songs ago. She went off with her newest fling to do god knows what. Leaving you with Greg who is rambling about the new story he’s writing for your class. “Looks like she had fun.” Your head snaps up, tuning back into the conversation. He tilted his head over to Melanie who was waltzing over to you. Her eyes are glowing and there’s a thin layer of sweat gleaming her skin. She’s fixing the hem of her dress right as she gets to you. “That good?” She looks over at Greg and nods. “That good.”

They share a look you really can’t decipher. “You know in the back hallway-” “Shut up Greg.” You stare at Melanie in disbelief at her tone. “I’m just saying I could show her.” She kicks him causing him to lift up his hands. “What am I missing?” Melanie rolls her eyes as she kicks Greg off of the couch. He grumbles something about grabbing another drink before leaving. “God I swear he’s annoying.” she steals your cup and takes a sip. “Just ignore him okay.” You look at her wanting to see what she’s hiding. “What’s in the back hallway?” A blush crosses her cheeks but she just shakes her head. “I don’t think it’s something you’re into.”

That’s the last thing she said about the cryptic hallway. Drunk people and drugs surround you. Greg and Melanie have their own conversation, not paying you mind. Giving you the perfect moment to slip away. Walking past a group of people you see a couple leaving a hallway giggling. With your interest peaked you head over not knowing what you were getting yourself into. Peaking your head around the corner you see Rafe and some of his friends. Kelce and Topper went to different colleges so it's his new dick head of friends. Not like the other two were better. “Just go already.” There’s a scoff. “No.”

“You lost and this was the price.” Murmurs fill the hallway before silence comes. Taking another look around the corner you see that they are all gone. Heading over to where they were standing you really don’t notice anything unusual.  There’s only two doors next to each other, while the rest of the walls are decorated. Testing one of the doors you realize it’s locked. Moving on to the next one you get success. The door opens showing a small room with a tv and some bean bags. There’s a coffee table in the middle of the room with what seems like porno magazines. Your face scrunches the thought of random people coming in here to get their rocks off.

A blinking light on the left side of the wall grabs your attention. The dim glow of a ready sign blinks slowly. Heading over to the wall you see a button. Curiosity wins as you press it, seeing another ready sign glow. Looking around the room you try to figure out what is happening. Turning back to the wall, taking a step closer you press your ear to the wall to hear something. Then something pokes your bare thigh. Looking down you see a hole in the wall and a dick sticking out through it. 

You take a step back out of instinct not knowing what to do. “I’m clean, don’t worry.” The voice from the other side is muffled but you swear you know it from somewhere. Schooling your breathing, you kneel down, nervous on where this is going. This certainly isn’t what you were expecting but you can’t help yourself. He has one of the biggest dicks you’ve ever seen. It’s girthy so you know it might be a struggle to fit him in your mouth. Or anywhere for that matter. It curves upwards a bit, making your mouth water from the thought of it hitting your g-spot.

Reaching forward, you take a hold of him and give him a squeeze. A moan comes from the other side of the wall as you start to pump him slowly. Spitting on the tip you lubricate your hand to help guide you. After a few strokes you bring yourself closer, licking the tip lightly. The taste of salt invades your mouth. His precum is salty and sweet at the same time making you want more of it. Should you really be doing this? Pushing the thought aside you wrap your mouth around his tip and deepthroat him.

A pounding sound startles you and the wall shakes. “Don’t stop.” Even though it’s muffled, you can hear the pleading pressure behind it. A shiver is sent down your spine at the thought of bringing some stranger pleasure. Increasing your pace, you take him as far as you can while using your other hand to stroke the rest. You keep gaging around him every time he reaches the back of your throat. Opening your eyes you see the flesh of his hip and upper thighs. His skin is so smooth. You want to reach through the opening but you stop when his hand comes into view. 

His hand holds the base of his cock as he starts to thrust forward. The combination of his thrusts and you bobbing your head has you reiling. You’re barely getting any air so your head is getting fuzzy. You pull back to catch some air and stare blankly at his hand. He’s stroking his base, waiting for you to return. But all you are looking at is his ring. The same one you’ve seen so many times before.

On his pointer finger sits a gold ring with the letters R.C. It’s the same family ring that Rafe always wears. “You okay, baby?” It’s still muffled but his voice is getting clearer now. You try to get back into the head space you were just in but you can’t. Thankfully when you don’t answer he retreats and you can finally breathe. There’s an ache between your thighs and when you try to stand up you can feel how wet you are. That shouldn’t have turned you on as much as it did. Being with him shouldn’t have turned you on.

You’re still trying to compose yourself when the door opens and clicks shut. You whip around to come face to face with an equally as shocked Rafe. “You.” There’s malice behind his words. As if he is disgusted at the thought of you being the one sucking the soul out of him. “You’ve got to be kidding me.” You narrow your eyes at him. “Didn’t say that a few seconds ago when I had you shoved down my throat.” His jaw clenches as silence fills the room. He takes a step closer and you can see that he still has his pants unbuckled. 

“So you followed me here? Thought you could finally get your chance with me?” Your blood boils at his insinuation. Scoffing, you cross your arms over your chest. You want to add as much distance between you two so you step back. “Contrary to popular belief, I wasn’t obsessed with you. I thought we were friends but to you I was just a punching bag.” His eyes darken and he actually laughs at you. His feet drag along the floor as he walks over to you. Each step he takes, you take one back. Eventually you hit the back of the wall meaning you have nowhere else to go. 

“You really think I’m so stupid that I didn’t see the way you looked at me?” He tilts his head to the right, staring down at you. “You're just a pathetic nobody that thought you were special. I only tolerated you because of our parents.” The way he stares down his nose at you, pisses you off. He’s always been so full of himself. You don’t know why you even liked him when you were younger. You really thought there was something different about him but he’s proved time and time again that he’s evil. “Cut me a fucking break Cameron. You’re still the same broken boy that came running crying to me after mommy left.”

Taking a step forward you decide to fight back for the first time in your life. “You’re so fucked up that she ran just to get away from you. I only stuck around because I pitied you. The little boy whose mommy left them. Not to mention how much daddy hates you.” There’s a snap in his expression. He’s always looked mad at the world but in this moment he looks murderous. In a flash a hand wraps around your throat constricting your airway. You claw at his wrist trying to get him off but it’s useless.

“Choose your next words wisely.” There’s a snarl in his voice. “If I remember correctly you kissed me saying how you always liked me. You can’t rewrite history.” His grip gets a little tighter, almost cutting off all air flow. “A mistake on my end. Not much to like anyway.” Your chest heaves up and down. With each breath your nipples brush against his chest making them harder. “A mistake.” He repeats back, trying to see if that’s really what you said. “Yeah, isn’t that what your dad said about you? Let me guess you decided to hurt me to make yourself feel better.” Rafe’s breathing picks and his grip tightens to the point that you feel it behind your eyes.

He lifts you slightly making you claw and kick at him to let you go. Blood rushes through your ears making everything sound funny. Your chest rises and falls at a fast pace before starting to slow. In a thud, you fall to the floor when he lets you go. It takes you a moment to catch your breath but it didn’t last long. Using the fact that he had his pants unbuttoned–he pulls them down to expose himself. He strokes his dick right in front of your face and uses his other hand to hold you by your hair. There’s a smirk on his face that makes you feel nervous.“Good to see you finally found a backbone.” He keeps stroking himself and you just feel frozen in this position.

“I like it when they fight.”

The tip of his cock pokes your lips, moving just as you part them to rub along your cheek. Pre-cum stains your skin as he keeps rubbing the head of his dick along your skin. His eyes follow the movement. He taps your lips letting you open them before shoving in. Your eyes close on instinct, moaning around his shaft as he thrusts into you. He pulls tightly at your hair making you open your eyes to look at him. There’s a spark in his eyes you haven’t seen in years. He’s hitting the back of your throat causing your gag reflex to be in overdrive. Which only made his thrust faster when you constricted around him. The hand that’s not holding your head travels to the straps of your dress. 

Rafe toys with the thin fabric while he keeps using your mouth. Your panties are becoming soaked with each thrust. If you asked yourself a few weeks ago if you’d like this, you would have said no. But being here right now is proving you wrong. All you want is for him to keep going and maybe go even further. As if he’s read your mind he drags the strap over your shoulder until your left breast is exposed. He does the same thing to the next strap so your top half is exposed to him. He slaps your cheek leaving a red mark from how hard it is. His hands go back to your hair to grip it.

Using the leverage he drags you along his dick. He holds your head down for a moment, making you deep throat him. He keeps you there restricting your air flow. When he drags you off, you gulp down any air you can get before he continues. His thrusts start to stutter then go back to their pace. “Shit.” It's a whisper but you heard it.

Rafe pulls out, gripping the base of his cock hardly to subside the impending orgasm. “Touch yourself.” The demand doesn’t help the throbbing you are feeling between your legs. When you don’t move quick enough for him, he pulls you up and moves you to the bean bags. Pushing you down into it, he pulls the other one to be right in front of you. “Pull up the dress and touch yourself. Or I’ll do it for you.” Tingles are sent down your spine as you just stare at him. “You can’t be serious.”

You don’t like the smirk he has as he strokes himself. It’s not his usually cocky one that he makes a show of wearing. No this is something more sultry. “As a heart attack. Now touch yourself.” Your heart flutters at the old dad joke you used to say. The same one he mocked until you refused to say it. He goes to make a move and you beat him to it. Pulling up the dress you present him with the black lace panties you are wearing. “Did you wear those for me?” You scoff at his audacity and just move on. “You wish.” Your panties glide down your leg exposing you to him. 

Every second that passes causes the fire in you to keep building. His stare isn’t letting up. You can feel a hole being burned into you as you tease yourself. Running a finger along your clit you moan. The leather like material of the bean bags squeaks with your movement. Lightly your fingers keep rubbing circles and sometimes dipping into your center to put on a show. Doing this in the comfort of your own room is so different from doing it in front of Rafe. Your head is everywhere with so many different thoughts. You really shouldn’t be doing this.

This is Rafe. The same boy who broke you in front of so many people just for his own pleasure. “Don’t stop.” He gets off the bean bag to kneel in front of you. His hands find your knees, slowly making their way up. Your breathing gets heavy as the smallest inkling of an orgasm builds. You squirm in his hold, increasing the pace of your fingers wanting to chase that feeling. The ceiling you were just staring at disappears as you close your eyes. Giving Rafe the perfect opportunity for Rafe to lean down and lick your pussy lips. Your eyes snap open to look just as he removes your hand so he can suck on your clit. 

Hooking his arms under your thighs, he pulls you closer to smother his face with you. His eyes are interlocked with yours, watching you fall apart. Your mouth drops open in a moan when he pushes a finger into you. Based on how wet you are he could probably just slide right in. A thought that made him even harder than he already is. The groan he lets out sends vibrations through your pussy making you cum on the spot. You clench around his fingers, spasming as he sucks harder onto your clit. The feeling prolongs, sending wave after waves. Just when you think you’re going to cum again he stops. 

He licks his lips clean and gives your thigh a kiss before biting it lightly. You wince at the feeling but it doesn’t last long. “Turn around.” He leans back and slaps the side of your thigh then helps you get on your knees. Your upper half is thrown over the top of the bean bag while your knees dig into the floor. Large hands rub against your ass cheeks giving them a squeeze. His thumb grazes over your folds spreading your slickness. Guiding his tip to your entrance, he lathers himself with your juices. “For all of that talk about hating me.” You look over your shoulder to look him in the eye. “You seem to be very impatient about fucking me.”

His grip on your ass cheek gets tighter just before he plows into you. Pausing for a moment he lets you adjust to his size. More like he takes a moment to compose himself because you’re right. “Just fulfilling your wildest dreams.”  He leans over your body to whisper in your ear. “I still remember what your diary said.” Heat floods your body but not in a good way. The same embarrassment you felt back then comes flooding back. Of course he still remembers what it says. He took time memorizing it just to recite it at the school talent show. “Fuck you.”

You try to push him off of you but he holds your head down and starts thrusting. “Wasn’t that the fantasy? To finally feel how it is for me to be inside you.” You try to push back again but it only makes you thrust back into him. He grabs your arms holding them out so you're practically suspended in the air. In this position he spears into you, hitting your g-spot over and over again. With each thrust your tits bounce . It’s harsh as he uses his grip to have you match his thrusts. His touch is making everything hazy. He moves one of your arms so he has two in one hand. The other hand reaches over to tug at your nipple.

You moan and arch your back, leaning away from his touch. “Couldn’t believe you could write such dirty shit.” His voice is right in your ear, bringing flashbacks to the forefront of your mind. “What was it that you said? ‘I wish he would just hold me down and just fuck me already. I want him to just mark me as his because I am.’ Gotta say almost had me.” He increases his thrusting and pushes you back into the bean bag. His right hand holds your head down. Pushing you into the material to the point you can barely breathe.

“Or my favorite. ‘I want him to sneak through my window and cover my mouth as he fucks me. Telling me that no one can hear us.’ Really kinky for you.” Tears sting your eyes as you try to fight a sob. You don’t know if it’s from the embarrassment or due to the pleasure he’s giving you. But it doesn’t matter because his next words stun you. “Should’ve done it.” His thrusts slow down a bit like his words stunned him too. “Shut up.”

He thrust in at a steady pace, removing his hands from you completely. “I would have done it if things were different.” A pang struck your heart at the words. “I would have snuck into your room every night. Fuck you every chance that I get because I can’t get enough of it.” His words are sending a fire through you in the best way possible. The emotional whiplash is getting to you, making your orgasm tetter on the edge.

Your ears start to buzz. Nothing really makes sense anymore but him. At this moment you really don’t care who he is. All that matters right now is the pleasure he’s giving you. You can hate yourself later but right now you are going to enjoy it. A hot sizzling pain shoots through you. Your right ass cheek burns and you let out a half scream that’s also a moan. His other hand rubs your clit, sending you over the edge. Your orgasm eases the pain from whatever happened to your ass. The tip of his cock keeps rubbing your g-spot prolonging the pleasure until it becomes too much. 

He pulls out and yanks you to kneel in front of him as he stands over you. Without being told anything you open your mouth and lick his tip. Rafe strokes his dick as he holds you in place to paint your face in cum. It covers most of your face, getting into your eyes covering your vision. A finger wipes it from your eyes and Rafe watches you as he licks him cum off of his finger. “What did you do?” You go to touch your ass to ache the pain you’re feeling. He grabs your wrist and hauls you up to him. Grabbing your face, he starts to lick off his cum before feeding it to you.

Your lips meet him, devouring the taste of him on your tongue. He’s holding you so tight that it hurts. You can feel some of your hairs pulling out from his grip on your hair. Rafe disconnects from the kiss and guides you over to a mirror on the wall. He turns you so you’re face to face and moves your head. You can see remnants of cum on your face making your cheeks heat. Roaming your eyes down your body, you land on a red mark on your ass check. Your eyes widen and your mouth drops open. 

Turning back around, you punch him repeatedly trying to express your frustration. “You fucking branded me?” All he did was smirk at you. It was like you weren’t pissed at him at all. Of course to him this would be funny. His hand lifts in the air to show off his stupid gold ring. The R.C looks less shiny as it once was. Probably from the heat he applied to it so he could mark you. “Now you know who you belong to.” His hand wraps around your throat bringing you in for another kiss. 

“I'm not done with you yet.”

Taglist: @haruvalentine4321 @namelesslosers @ijustwanttoreadlols @drewsphswife @corpsebridenightamare @actorslover @juniperbaies @fionaswifeyy @dark1paradise @stoned-writer @notafairyteen @theoraekenslover @rafedaddy01 @rrafeswhore@10ava01@selfcontollover07 @akobx@rafesbabygirlx@lolasangelz@emmaaas-posts@anacamofficial@theoraekenslover@drewsphswife@illicitpages@angelteardropss@solaceluna let me know if you want to be added!

[writingroom21]

Run

Pairing: Hunter!Rafe x Prey!Reader

Summary: You can't stop. Every move you make is matched by his. You can't hide from him no matter how hard you try. You better run because he's coming.

Warnings: 18+,Primal play, cnc, a bit of violence, smut, unprotected sex, chocking(with a belt), slapping (ass and pussy), air play, cream pie, let me know if I need anything

Wc: 2.1K

Masterlist

A layer of pitch black film covers everything around, as you fumble through the never ending trees. The only sound is the echoes of a faint song from the very place you came from. Crickets fill in the void making it hard to hear anything. Taking a shaking step forward you look around before entering the clearing. The empty wooded area is surrounded by tall trees. Small glimpses of the moon peak through the leaves, barely illuminating the space. Your breath picks up when you realize you don’t know where you are.It takes you a few minutes to realize you shouldn’t stay.

He’ll find you if you stay.

As if he read your mind, you hear a twig snap just in front of you. Standing there for a moment you strain your eyes to see something. But nothing comes up. Maybe it was an animal but you know better. You can feel him. Taking a step back you scan the trees in front of you waiting for him to step out. But he doesn’t. Your heart starts to race when you realize you truly don’t know where he is. Heavy breaths ring in your ear as you start to walk backwards. Fuck this. You start to run just as he steps out from where he was hiding. Which is not where you thought he originally was. Shit. His footsteps start to pick up as you sprint to the tree line.

A laugh ripples through the space between you. Is he really laughing? “Keep running, little mouse.” The trees make you vanish from his view but not far enough as you still hear him. “I’ll find you.” A rogue stick that is pointing out of a bush scrapes your arm. The pain radiates in the area almost making you let out a scream. You continue running and take a small glance to your right arm. There’s a cut on your forearm, coating your skin with crimson red. The cut starts to sting more as your sweat mixes with your blood. But all you can think about is running.

Your footsteps are heavy and the sound shows it. Fuck. If you keep running like this he’ll definitely find you. Taking a second you stop so you can take some deep breaths. In that moment you catch the sight of something. Taking hasty steps you notice that it’s a small wooden cabin or maybe a shed. Taking a glance behind you, it seems like the best option. Racing over to the safe haven, you duck into it taking the shelter. Pressing your back against the wall, you crouch behind some larger items. Your chests rise and fall as silence consumes you. The racing of your heart doesn’t die down. Every little noise outside makes it spike along with your fear.

“Little mouse.”

The voice is right outside of the door. A shadow foams under the slit of the door causing your heart rate to spike again. The door knob rattles lightly before stopping. There’s a tapping noise like he’s debating on entering. Then there’s silence. Taking a chance you peep around your hiding spot to see that the shadow under the door is gone. Frantically you start to look around, trying to look between the boards. All you have to do is wait him out. 

A few minutes tick by and the anxiety starts to build again. You can’t stay here. Once he realizes he can’t find you, he’ll come back. If you leave now then maybe you can get back to the house. You didn’t mean you sneak away and get trapped in all of this. All you wanted was some fresh air from the party. Where you wandered to the very back of the yard. But when you turned around to go back there was a guy standing there.  He was wearing a white mask with splatters of red mimicking blood. Thin black lines fall from the bottom of the eye opening to the top of the cheekbone. 

The thought of it sends shivers down your spine. Slowly getting up you make your way to the door and open it just a bit. A sea of slowly light trees fill your view. It’s no or never. Swinging the door open you start to run. You dodge trees for a few hundred feet before you're lifted in the air. A solid arm is wrapped around your waist as a hand covers your mouth to mask your scream. “Shhh it’s okay little mouse. I’ve found you.” You struggle against him, kicking your feet in the air before swinging them back. Lucky for you the kick got him right in his dick giving you a moment. Your left arm swings back connecting with his side. Right before he lets you go, you bite his hand.

He lets out a laugh when you get away but it doesn’t matter. It only takes him a few strides to catch up with you.Twirling around you go to punch him only for him to catch it in mid air. Without struggling you kick him again and throw your body weight on him. He stumbles back, falling to the ground taking you with him. A huff of air escapes him followed by a grunt. You try to scramble from his grasp but it's too strong. In a swift movement he’s on top of you. His knee presses into your back making you scream a bit. “You can run all you like. I’ll just hunt you down again.”

He maneuvers down to press his chest to your back. “Please run. You look so pretty when you’re scared.” A pang in your lower stomach makes you squirm. You try to fight him off which only makes him grind down into you. A small moan comes from you causing him to pause. He tsks and shakes his head while lowly chuckling. “Oh little mouse, do you like this?” His hips grind down harder. Your head drops down to the dirt floor so you can compose yourself. “Run because when I catch you, I’m going to fuck you.” Just when he finishes his body weight completely vanishes. Scrambling forward you get up and run through the trees. 

The slickness between your legs feels uncomfortable as you rush away. You can hear him laughing from the side of you but you know he’s still behind. Running to the left you try to go back to the house. As soon as you get there you’ll be safe. Your legs are burning making it harder to keep going. Twigs that lay on the forest woods snap from somewhere around you but you refuse to look back. The music from the party is long gone meaning no one is around. A swirl of panic fills your stomach making you run a bit faster.

Then all of the air in your lungs is ripped out of you.

Pain radiates all through your body as your head rings. A taste of dirt consumes you as you inhale deep breaths. The crushing weight on you shifts, grinding you deeper into the ground. The skin on your knees is raw from being scraped up. “You lost, little mouse.” You try to kick back and he uses his knees to stop you. His knees slot right behind yours so he can look down at you. One of his hands traces down your spine, holding you down as the other hand slides up your dress. A low groan comes from him as your red lace panties stare back at him.

“Are these all for me?” The tip of his pointer finger teases your slit over the thin fabric. Your hips jerk slightly as he probs into your entrance. The fabric makes it feel weird but it doesn’t last long. His finger disappears so you lift your head to look back. A rough hand shoves you face to the ground with no regard. Thankfully you land on a soft patch of grass. “Please keep struggling.” He leans down and grinds down on you. “It really turns me on.” You feel his erection perfectly rubbing against the slope of your ass. The fabric of your panties are pushed to the side and his middle finger toys with your entrance. Your start to thrash screaming out a no only to be pushed deeper into the ground.

Then he pushes in two fingers.

Not that it took much with how wet you are. “You hear that, mouse?” He pumps his fingers in and out, curling them as he’s pulling away. Low noises surround the both of you as he continues to drill his fingers into you. “You’re fucking soaked.” A loud slap echoes the empty forest. Your ass burns even more as he slaps you a few more times. Then he removed his fingers and slapped your pussy hard. A loud moan comes from you while hot liquid squirts out of you. Your body shakes from the force of your orgasm. Tingles invade your body making you incapacitated for a moment. 

A wave of pleasure overcomes you, making you realize he pulled his pants down. He’s thrusting into you hard causing you to slide along the floor. Your hand slams down collecting a fist full of dirt and grass. His dick hits your g-spot over and over again, building the ball of pleasure at the base of your stomach. “Please.” Your voice is airy and small, not really knowing what you are asking for. “Please, what?” The huskiness of his voice makes you even more wet. “Want me to fuck you harder?” He follows his sentence with a hard thrust that comes along with even more. “I bet you liked me hunting you down like the little slut you are.”

You moan even louder. “I told you, you’d never escape me.” Something slithers against your neck making you jerk. What feels like leather raps around your delicate skin pulling tight. Your whole body is pulled up bringing you close to his chest. A tear slips down your face mixing with the dirt caking it to your face. His hips grind into your, digging his cock into your cervix as he grabs your face. Slowly his mask comes into view making your nerves pick up again. The material, what you assume is a belt, gets tighter causing little dots to cross your eyes. “Fucking cum.”

A scream rips out of you as your whole body tightens up and you shake in his arms. His fingers on your face leave marks from how hard he holds you. A shaky hand reaches up to pull his mask off but the belt gets tighter cutting off all air. Your hand abandons its previous route to claw at the material to get it off. The more your struggle the harder he thrusts into you. It only took a few more thrust before your limps started to sag. Just before you passed out the reins were let loose. Air rushes into your lungs only to be taken away once again.

His dark laugh reaches your ears making your head swirl even more. “Fuck.” His hips pick up a quicker pace. Your nails scrap against your neck as you keep clawing at the belt. Just when you think you will actually pass out, warmness fills you. The belt is let loose again as your head is wrenched back to meet a pair of lips. Fire consumes you as you kiss him back, needing this just as much as he does. The slow thrusts finally cease and he pulls out. Cum drips out of your entrance gliding down your thighs.

“Holy shit, Rafe.”

Rafe laughs as he pulls away from the kiss. “I think you busted my lip earlier. What happened to I won't hurt you?” He helps you up, unwrapping the belt to inspect the damage. “You’re one to fucking judge.” You huff. A napkin is shoved into your hand as Rafe kisses you again. Taking it, you clean your thighs. When you reach your pussy he stops you. Pushing you against the nearest tree, he kneels down to clean you up. You moan and start to ride his face but he pulls away.

“Couldn’t help myself. You looked so cute when you got scared.” Shoving him you push past him to head back to the house. “Did you really have to do it while everyone is probably looking for us?” He’s still buckling his pants as he catches up. The belt that left soft red marks around your neck rests in his hand. “I think they’re all too drunk to notice.” His mask dangles from his finger tips taunting you. You pass the clearing the leads back to the house. “You know I rented the cabin for an extra few days. Once they leave we can have more fun.” Rafe shakes the mask in front of you.

“You’re on.”

Taglist: @haruvalentine4321 @namelesslosers @ijustwanttoreadlols @drewsphswife @corpsebridenightamare @actorslover @juniperbaies @fionaswifeyy @dark1paradise @stoned-writer @notafairyteen @theoraekenslover @rafedaddy01 @rrafeswhore @10ava01 @selfcontollover07 @akobx @rafesbabygirlx @lolasangelz @emmaaas-posts @anacamofficial @theoraekenslover @drewsphswife @illicitpages @angelteardropss @solaceluna let me know if you want to be added!

[writingroom21]

Also I got up on girls on film finally and I hope that baby isn’t rafes like omg

Ahhhh yeah that baby is just causing mischief without knowing. Reader is definitely stressing lowkey but keeping a brave face

[writingroom21]

No pls let them be happy what do you mean it gets worse with her and rafe

I’m sure they’ll get there eventually. There’s just going to be as little more heartbreak on the way. Sorry in advance

[writingroom21]

I hate to say it….but it gets worse🫣

Sweet Escape

Pairing: Rafe x single mom reader

Summary: Moving to Kildare with your best friend and daughter was the perfect move. The little island is perfect, the people are nice, and you are finally at peace. Then Rafe comes in with his perfect smile and charm, sweeping you off your feet. The only issue is if you are ready to let someone else in.

Warnings: This one is sad so sorry in advance, Miscarriage, let me know if I missed any

Wc: 7K

Chapter 14: Just Stay

series masterlist

“Okay you can do this.” 

You stare at your rearview window trying to talk yourself up. The building next to you seems so daunting. The last time you were here you were dating Rafe. Now you’re just the ex that's sulking around trying to talk to him. Looking over at the building windows panic fills you. Fuck you can’t do this. This was the fourth time you tried to come talk to him but each time you chickened out.

Jo is on the verge of telling Kelce just so Rafe can find out. A fact that she tells you each morning when you walk into the kitchen. If you come home today without telling him then she definitely will. A tap on the window scares you. Your heart is pounding as you look to the left to see Rafe standing there. 

His blue eyes stare into you but the rest of his face seems closed off. You give him a nervous smile and it kind of breaks him. The window rolls down, taking away the last bit of separation you had. “You’ve been coming around.” He points it out, not harshly but it feels like it. You swallow the lump in your throat so you can just spit the words out. “Yeah we need to talk.”

He walks around to the other side and gets in the car. “I miss you.” He doesn’t look at you when you say it. The side of his face makes it hard to see how he is feeling. But you are guessing he’s upset. “I’m pregnant.” You don’t know why you didn’t say it back. All you could think about is that if you don’t say it now you won’t say it at all. Your heart is racing as you wait for him to say something. His head turns to you slowly.

The way the sun shines down highlights the tears in Rafe’s eyes. “You’re pregnant.” People walk by giving you a momentary distraction. Reaching into the back seat you grab your purse to pull out the pregnancy tests. Three tests all showing the same result sit in your hands. Outside chatter seeps its way into the car filling the silence you’re sitting in. One of his hands reaches out and takes a test out of your hand. 

You watch as he examines the stick with no emotion on his face. Flashes of Theo come flooding back. “You’re getting rid of it right.” Your head snaps back to Rafe who's staring at you. “Excuse me?” No, you will have the same experience twice. His hand reaches back out to you and grabs yours. You try to snatch it back but he won't let go.

“You’re keeping it right?” His eyes are shining in the light right now. A stray tear threatens to fall from his left eye. “Please keep the baby. I’ll be there in any way that you want. But please don’t take this from me too.”  You sit there in shock at the man sitting in front of you. He lowers his head and brings your joint hand so he can rest on them. His shoulders shake as he cries. 

Looking up at the roof of your car, you try to keep your emotions in check. Which was a total fail because you can feel the tears coming. Resting a hand behind his head you rake your fingers through his hair. “I’m keeping it.” Slowly his head lifts up with him sniffling. His face lights up in pure joy. Probably the first time since you broke with him that he actually felt happy.

Actually he felt this happy when he saw you from his car walking out the courthouse with a huge smile. The only real times he felt good about himself or life in general is tied to you and Violet.​​ This just adds to another moment. It doesn’t matter if you decide to get back together with him or not. Just knowing he has a chance to get his family back even just in a small way is worth it. 

His next actions were conducted in a haze of excitement. He grabs your face and kisses you. Maybe it was a freak accident but the kiss shocked you. As in actually gave you an electric shock. He pulls away slightly and smiles. “We’re having a baby.” His nose nuzzles against yours. “We’re parents again.” The softness of the again made your heart squeeze. You start to smile and nod along. “We’re having a baby.”

He kisses you again and plasters a bunch of kisses across your face. “Come on, get out. We are going in my car.” You squint your eyes at him. Confused, you probe him for more information. “We need to celebrate.” He grabs your hand and places a kiss on it before getting out. Walking over to your side he helps you out and waits for you to lock it. 

“I’m a dad again.”

Looking back at him you see a huge smile on his face. He’s telling a random lady who’s walking by with her dog. “Good for you.” She smiles at him and extends it to you before walking away. Riding the high, Rafe drags you to his car to get you food. Which was a great call since you were hungry. You expected it to be weird sitting across from each other. In reality it was a bit awkward  at first. Then it was like everything went back to normal.

Everything around you just seemed brighter.

By the time the check came you felt like no time had passed. You both sit there not wanting to get up. “When can I see Vi?” The question wasn’t surprising but you were hoping he wouldn’t mention it. When you look at him, he’s twisting the wrapper of his straw. “I have an appointment on Thursday. We can take her to get ice cream after.” Rafe’s eyes light up as relief floods his system.

Taking a chance, he grabs your hand and presses a kiss to your fingers. “I miss you.” He uses present tense like you're not sitting in front of him. Not I’ve missed you but like he still yearns for something. Maybe he’s right. There’s a part of you that feels like you don’t deserve him. He’s done so much for you with the whole Theo situation. Then you threw him to the side like he meant nothing.

You feel guilty that you could hurt someone that you love. “I miss you too.” His thumb rubs against yours and you both just stare at each other. Things are not going to go back to where they were instantly. But at least this is a start to getting back there. 

The ride back to your car was kind of silent. The realization that you’re back in each other’s life is big. Not only that, it’s due to having a baby. It’s weird thinking that you're right back to where you were as a teen. But this time you finally have someone who’s in it with you. Honestly you’re on cloud 9 just being next to him and feeling his hands on you again. 

It was starting to get dark when you got to your car. Rafe walked you to the drivers side, stopping you before you got in. You look at him waiting for him to say something but he doesn’t. His left hand cups your cheek and he leans down to kiss you. The kiss lasted a few seconds before he pulled away while clearing his throat. “Can I text you before the appointment?”

It kind of breaks you that he’s asking for permission. “Of course.” With a little nod he backs away and watches you drive off. You’re riding high the whole way home. As soon as you open the door Jo comes rushing over and hugs you. “Where have you been? You weren’t at the shop and I was looking for you everywhere.” You hug her back, giving her a big squeeze. “I was with Rafe.” You pull back with a smile but it slightly fades when you see her puffy eyes. 

“What’s wrong?” You toss your shoes on the shoe rack by the front door and walk with her to the couch. Vi is playing on the floor with some dolls so some relief floods you. Jo throws herself on the couch, grabbing a cushion to place it on her lap. “Had to take nana to the doctors today and she’s sick.” You sit down next to her and wrap her in your arms. “Is June okay?”

She sniffles and nods. “Yeah they gave her some meds so she should be good. It just scared me.” Toys clutter together as Vi throws them aside to join the hug. Tiny arms wrap themselves around Jo’s neck. The action makes her laugh. “June’s going to be okay. If the doctors weren’t worried then we shouldn’t.” Jo takes a moment just hugging Vi close to her chest. “How did it go with you know who?”

You take this as a sign to change the subject. “Good he’s going to the appointment with me.” Her head picks up and she puts Vi back down so she can go play. “That’s supposed to be our thing.” She whines while closing her eyes. She rolls them and sighs. “I’m excited for the both of you.” She smiles at you and gives you a nudge. “Another little Vi running around is gonna be nice.”

“It’s going to be a boy. I feel it.”

The rest of the night you two chatter about what a new baby means for the house. June is overjoyed thinking about a new bundle of joy. “I swear I’m going to smother that child.” Her pure joy just made you feel good. She didn’t stay long but it was nice seeing that she’s happy as well. Vi was clueless about everything but caught onto the word baby. Luckily she thought she’d gotten a new baby doll.

Which now that you think about it is not a bad idea. Maybe it will make her warm up to the sibling idea. There’s a smile on your face that just won’t seem to leave. You went to bed with it and woke back up with a smile. Your morning was normal. You got Vi ready and went to the shop.

Sarah was working today and decided to open the store early. When you get there she already took inventory and restocked everything. “There was a package for you so I left it on your desk.” She carries a few pots to the back shelf and arranges them around. The curtains open up and John B walks outs along with the rest of their friends. “Sorry we stopped by before we head off to fish.” Pope tries to explain as if they are doing something wrong.

You giggle and wave them off. “Don’t worry I don’t mind. Never going to say no to extra hands.” Kiara smiles as she looks around the shop. “Ever think about growing vegetables in the green house in the back?” You tilt your head at her and think about the idea. “You can sell them to the market down the street just like the flowers.” Sarah pipes up. You can see where this is going. 

“If you’re up for it you have the go ahead.” Kiara and Sarah smile at each other and squeal. Kiara goes to say something again but you beat her to it. “Yes, that means you’re an employee. Just let me know your availability.” Both girls jump into each other's arms, hugging each other tight. Vi runs up to them to hug their legs wanting to be included. Sarah picks her up and spins her around. 

Kiara turns to you and goes over to give you a hug. “Thank you so much. I can start right now.” You hug her back. “Enjoy your fishing day. You can start tomorrow if you want.” The group of friends chat for a bit longer. They all take turns holding Vi, passing her in a circle until they leave. After counting the register you head back to the office and see an envelope on your desk. That must be what Sarah was talking about.

You can hear her and Vi singing to some Justin Bieber song. Placing the money bag down you pick it up to see it from Theo. Opening it slowly, you take the papers out to find documents. In fine print he signed over his rights to Violet claiming to never wanting contact. Sitting in the desk chair you reread the papers.

You’re free

Pulling out your phone you pull up one contact. You read this morning's conversation. A simple good morning fills your screen along with your reply and short conversation. Crafting up a text you find the courage to send it. Theo finally signed over his rights. As if he was waiting for your text, he sends you one back right away. That’s amazing! Seems like there’s a lot to celebrate this week. A smile creeps its way onto your face as you read the message.

How should we do that?

You cringe after you send the message. Hovering over it you debate on unsending it. Then three little dots appear. A date. It was simple but it made your stomach flutter. The feeling gets more intense but you get distracted with a knock. “What’s got you all smiley?” Sarah is standing in the doorway. With the way she’s looking at you it seems like she senses something.

“Theo finally signed his rights over.” The perfect excuse to be extra happy right now. She lets out a scream and rushes over to you. You let out a huff of air when she squeezes you tight. “Yay! I’m so happy for you.” You hug her back tightly. Even though Wheezie and Sarah are still around, you felt like there was this disconnect. In the end you have to face the fact you hurt their brother. At least they understood where you were coming from.

It’s nice having her comfort in this moment. “Okay I’ll go start on some orders so we can celebrate for lunch.” Her bright smile makes you smile more. There’s another flutter in your stomach, only this time it’s stronger. Ignoring the feeling you text Rafe back quickly confirming you like the idea. You go along with the day enjoying lunch as they gave you extra pickles. 

You were exhausted by the time you got home at the end of the day. You made a lemon chicken pasta while Jo made an on theme dessert of lemon drizzle cupcakes. Vi devoured her meal before taking her sweet time with the cupcake. June picks at her meal not really interested in it. “I’m sorry sweetie just can’t keep solids down today. It’s delicious nonetheless.” Jo sends you a look but you dismiss it so she’s not worried.

Jo washes the dishes while you go to the bathroom to shower. You noticed some spotting on your underwear but brushed it aside. When you were pregnant with Vi you had spotting for a while before it went away. Your nightly routine goes the same way it always does. Next you give Vi a bath before putting her to bed. 

“Cupcake?” 

Jo hands you one when you step out of the room. You take it and take a bite enjoying the lemon flavor. She looks apprehensive as she shifts her feet. The two of you stand in the hallway. “What’s wrong?” She looks at you wondering if she should say what her brain is telling her. “I know that the baby changes things but I want you to be happy okay.” Puzzled, you give her a look before dragging her to your room. Walking past the piles of clothes you place the cupcake on the nightstand and sit on the bed.

Jo follows along and sits next to you. “I’m lost.” She sighs, not knowing how to go about this. “You’re my best friend and I want you to know that I love you.” Nerves start to fill your body as to what can possibly be worrying her. Usually she’s straight forward but right now she’s hiding something. “Don’t blow this second chance please. He loves you so much and Vi loves him. I want you to be happy and that’s with him.” 

You don’t say anything for a second and she’s ready to do damage control. “I love you and living with you. But I don’t want to hold you back. When you moved in with us I promised to protect you. That includes protecting you from yourself.” She scoots closer and takes one of your hands. “This is the happiest I’ve ever seen you and I’ve known you my whole life. I can’t let you lose that.” 

You hug her. She’s always been your biggest support but it’s more than that. Through everything she’s been your sister. “You don’t have to worry. I think Rafe and I are on the same page.” She giggles. When you pull back you wipe away her tears. “Good because it's been tough seeing you like this. I’m glad things are going back to normal.”

You agree. You’re very happy that things are getting normal again. Sure under circumstances you didn’t see coming but it’s happening. Which is all you could think about as you tried to sleep and the next day. Your thoughts were occupied by the fact you and Rafe are starting a family. A nervous notion you dwell on as you drive to the appointment. Rafe had a morning meeting so he’s meeting you there.

Parking your car close to the entrance, you wait to see Rafe’s truck. A silver car parks next to you ruining the side to side parking you set up. Which is fine since there’s a spot in front of you. To kill some time you scroll on your phone. After ten minutes a truck parks in front of you. Looking up you see Rafe’s smiling face beaming at you. Getting out of the car you meet him in front of the cars. 

Rafe bends to give you a kiss which you don’t protest. “Hi flower girl.” You giggle at the nickname. “Hey space boy.” The parking lot is kind of full so Rafe blocks you off from any traffic. His hand finds yours and laces your fingers together. His thumb grazes against yours helping soothe the racing in your heart. Stealing a glance you see that his mouth is in a fine line. A tell that he has when he’s nervous.

“You okay?” His eyes meet yours and he smiles. “I’m nervous. I was lucky that with Vi I skipped all the nerve racking stuff.” You nod your head understanding where he’s coming from. It’s scary dealing with all of the details that comes with being pregnant. “Not saying I wouldn’t have enjoyed it. I wish I did get that but at least we get to do it again from the start.” The automatic doors open letting you into the building.

To the left there’s a huge board with all of the doctors' names. Finding your doctor you let him squirm for a moment. “I’m glad I get to do it again with you.” When you turn around he lifts his head up to look at you. “Welcome to the crazy world of parenthood.” He smiles as you both joke on your way up to the office.

Stepping into the waiting room there’s already a couple there. The woman looks around seven months pregnant. Based on her face she is counting down the days until the baby is out. You have Rafe sit down while you check in. You give the receptionist your information before going to sit back down. 

Rafe is sitting near the couple chatting to the guy as the lady listens. “We actually have a three year old at home. But this is my first time going through all of this.” The man pats Rafe on the shoulder as he looks at what you assume is his wife. “We have an almost four years old at home. We should set up a play date sometime.” Sitting down next to Rafe he introduces all of you. The lady that you now know is Jen smiles at you. Her husband Frank continues to chat with Rafe, pulling out his phone to what you presume is to exchange numbers. 

“How far along are you?” Jen asks as she starts to fan herself. She’s probably having heat flashes now. You got them at the end of your pregnancy and they were not fun. “Around 3 months I think. I only found out recently so this is our first check up.” She laughs and frantically points to her stomach. “Surprise pregnancy. Didn’t know until I was almost six months, can you believe it?”

Your eyes widen and you hear the boy's conversation halt. Looking over at Rafe you can see he has the same expression. “Thought I had my period because of spotting. Should’ve known better.” You place a hand on your chest from the pure shock. Sure you’ve heard of cryptic pregnancies but this is the first you’ve seen it. “Same with me. I’ve been spotting for a while and thought nothing of it.”

She moves over to sit by you and chats until she’s called. “I’m sure Frank will reach out. He’s obsessed with getting Nicky friends.” SHe gives you a wave as they both leave. “Did she just say Nicky? Did I just set up a date?” He looks mortified which makes you laugh. A nurse comes and calls for you so you help pick him up.

“Their toddlers, Rafe. You can worry about that when she’s older.” The older lady gestures for you to enter one of the neat rooms. The pale yellow walls give a small sense of joy. Much better than white walls that make you think you’re losing your mind. “One of the nurses will be in shortly to go over history. Then the doctor will be in.” She points to the robe and tells you to put it on in the meantime. 

You change into the garments and sit down on the papered chair. Rafe is walking around the room looking at all of the decorations. There’s a wooden board on the wall showing all of the stages of dilations. In shock he points to ten centimeters then back at you. “Is that?” He doesn’t know how to phrase the question so he stops.

“Yup but that's just the head. The shoulders are wider.” He gulps at the thought of it which makes him shiver. “Sorry.” He mumbles while looking at a fetus replica. Reaching out one of his fingers runs over it. “I can’t wait to feel the baby kick.” You enjoy watching him being so open. Everything he says just leaks with excitement. It warms you knowing that you aren’t alone in your happiness.

A knock on the door makes both of you look over as a nurse peaks in. “Can I come in?” You wave her in and Rafe takes the seat next to you. She looks over some paperwork as she’s picking up a needle. “Okay I just need to draw up some blood to confirm you’re pregnant. Then I’ll ask you some questions and start the scan.” Rafe holds your hand to give you some sort of support. The  rubber band constricts your arm giving the nurse the perfect vein to prick.

The tube fills with crimson as the nurse chats with you. “When was your last period?” Thinking back to it you realize it’s been a while. “In December. I’ve had spotting so I thought I was having light periods.” She nods and takes the needle out before bandaging you up. She removes the rubber band and places it on her cart. Writing down your she simultaneously puts your sample away.

“That’s normal. A lot of women get implantation bleeding after becoming pregnant. I saw you already have a child, did you get it in your first pregnancy?” You confirm that you did. “As long as it eventually goes away everything should be fine. The scan can also clear things up.” She asks you for the dates of your period before going to give your sample to the lab.

She came back quickly setting up the sonogram to get a better look. Laying back you watch as she places the covering over the wand and places lube on it. “What’s that?” Rafe leans a bit closer to you trying not to sound too dumb. “It’s a wand for internal sonograms.” He give you a look of ‘what the fuck.’ The coolness makes you twitch, then the slight discomfort gets you squirming. 

Rafe holds your hand squeezing it until you open your eyes again. The screen initially was more towards you but it seems like it was moved. You look at the nurse waiting for her to say something. She’s typing on the computer before briefly pausing. Casting you a glance she adverts her eyes and randomly taps on the side of the computer. “Stupid screen. They’ve been giving us trouble the last few weeks.” 

The force of the wand being removed makes you lean up. “How did the baby look?” She keeps typing, not really acknowledging what you said. “Sorry I can’t really see anything on this screen, let me go get a new one.” Taking the computer with her, she rushes out of the room. “Maybe we can find a different office. You know, get one that has computers that work.” Rafe’s speaking but you aren’t really paying attention.

The doctor comes into a room, pushing a computer right next to you. “Hi I’m doctor Martin.” Her calming voice slows your heart rate just slightly. “Let me just take a look. The nurse you had is new and it can be tricky with the computers we have.” Leaning back down, you adjust yourself on the chair. A sheet is placed over your lower half and the doctor opens the robe some more. “I thought you had to use the other one?” 

Dr. Martin squirts some gel on your lower abdomen and grabs a different wand. “We can but this one works just as well. We couldn’t really get a read on it so I’m trying a different wand.” The wand rubs the gel all over your stomach. Rafe places a kiss to the side of your head but you just focus on the doctor's typing. “Do we get one of those pictures to take home?” Her face when he asks the question gives something away.

With a sigh she wipes off the wand and puts it back on the rack. She cleans off your abdomen and you sit up. Rafe is looking between you and the doctor to understand what he’s missing. “When our nurse was doing her scan she noticed that the gestational sac looked a bit small.” She pauses and pulls out your test results to look at your test results. “Your test results show a higher level hCG but it doesn’t match your last period.”

Rafe shakes his head not getting what she’s saying. “So she got the dates mixed up. She’s not that far along then.” It feels like the air is restricted. Your lungs are burning from the lack of oxygen but your body can’t catch up. Rafe is trying to ask the doctor what she’s trying to say but you try to get one ounce of air. “I’m so sorry. The ultrasound shows no signs of development. I truly wish that this was a different outcome.”

You start to sob at the reality that's washing over you. Clutching your stomach you move to the side to sob into Rafe’s shoulder. “It’s possible your spotting was due to the passing of the embryo.” Another sob comes crashing out of you. Rafe wraps his arms around you pulling you closer to his chest. “I don’t get it. Maybe it's just your computer since they weren’t working.” It’s still not fully registering with him.

“The computers are fine. Nurses aren’t allowed to make that call and that’s why she pulled me in.” There’s a moment where all you can hear is the blood flowing through your veins. Everything is drowned out by the sound of your heart beating. A hand is placed on your leg and you look to see Dr. Martin is staring at you. With solemn eyes she hands you a few sonograms. 

“I thought you’d like to have this. Here’s some flyers as well. I’ll give you some time.” The photo stares back at you showing the tiniest little freckle in a sea of darkness. Rafe's finger touches the spot. “Is that?” All you can do is nod as you sob. He holds you tight, nuzzling his head in your neck. Droplets hit your shoulder as he silently cries with you. His hand reaches for your head to scratch your scalp.

It always calmed you down before and he hopes it helps this time. Eventually the tears stop coming and you both just sit there. WIthout saying anything you get dressed. Both of you walk out hating the feeling of everyone staring. Dr. Martin stops you on your way out. “Here’s a prescription for some heavy strength tylenol. It will help with the pain.” She hands you the slip and looks at Rafe. “I do recommend looking at the flyers. Again I’m so sorry.”

“Why did it happen?” She braces herself like she was expecting it. Rafe sounds so confused and he just wants an answer. “A lot of women miscarry in the first trimester. It can be from many different reasons, sadly it just happens.” That’s what makes it worse. There was a chance it wouldn’t have happened. But once again you are happy in your life and it’s taken away. Maybe this was a sign.

This isn’t supposed to be how your life is. The universe is punishing you for taking something that isn’t yours. Rafe holds your hand all the way to the parking lot in a state of numbness just like you. He tries dragging you to his car but you pull away. “Come on, I should drive you home. I’ll get your car later.” All of your nerves feel on fire. Your chest keeps getting tighter and you just want everything to stop.

“I think I’m just going to go home.” Pointing to your car, you try to convey the message that you are leaving. In panic motions, Rafe races ahead of you to stop you from going further. “Woah, listen lets just go home and take today to process everything.” His voice is hoarse with the plea. Tears start to build up in your eyes. The familiar lump in your throat from giving him a chance to keep talking.

“Don’t make us go through this alone.” The parking lot feels more empty than it really is. It feels like you’re not even in any realm of reality right now. “Listen, I'm just as shocked and hurt as you are. But I just can’t do this.” The once blue eyes you knew shatter. You watch as he physically breaks in front of you, tears welling in his eyes. “Is being with me and starting a family really that awful for you? Did I ever mean anything to you or were you just using me as a placeholder?” You take a step forward reaching out to him but he steps back. “Rafe.” He shakes his head while his hands rub his face. 

“I just lost a baby. I need time.” His head snaps up and there’s fury in his eyes. You’ve never seen this much hatred on him ever. Especially not to you. “Don’t you fucking dare.” His voice is like ice. You physically take a step back on instinct trying to create distance. “We. WE LOST A FUCKING KID NOT YOU.” His nostrils flare along with his jaw that he keeps clenching. “I’m not that fucking deadbeat that left you. Stop trying to pretend like I’m evil to make yourself feel better.”

There are people walking to the cars who rush by. Not wanting to get in the middle of everything. The couple from the waiting room stand by their car making sure things don’t escalate. “We just found out we lost our kid and you’re alreadying leaving. Would you even have come back if you weren’t pregnant?” The question startles you because that’s the last thing on your mind. “You always meant something to me. I lo-“ He cuts you off before you can finish you sentence. 

“I don’t want to fucking hear it. Save the bullshit for the next guy who falls for it. I loved you, the first person I ever felt that with and you fucked me over.” Tears start to gather on your waterline ready to overflow. “The water works really? Wow what a fucking show.” He starts to slowly clap his hands, applauding you for the act. “Rafe, I'm trying to be serious. This is hard for me too. I don’t know how to feel right now. I just need to be by myself.” You wipe the tears from your face. “I really wanted this baby and now that’s all gone.”

“EXACTLY. The family we wanted just got destroyed for the second time. You already left me the first time so stay.” His eyes are red and now are becoming puffy. “Rafe.” He raises a hand to stop you. “If you leave, that's it. I can’t have you break me again.” There’s a lifeless look in his eyes. It’s as if all the light in them died. You go to reach for him again but he pushes your hands off of you. He already knows what you’re about to do.

“Wanna know the worst part about all of this? I really do love Vi. I didn’t just lose you or the baby. I lost my daughter and I hate you for that.” A sob wrecks through your body. You feel as if you could collapse on the ground from how weak you feel. “Don’t say that.” He walks over to his truck and you think he’s going to leave you there. Then he comes back with a folder and hands it to you. “If you didn’t want anymore kids I could have lived with that. You and Vi were enough for me. Thank you for showing me that I still don’t deserve love.” He laughs after his sentence backing up as he looks you in the eyes. “Honestly started to believe I was wrong.” 

You stand there watching as he gets into his truck and leaves. Through teary eyes you find your car and sit in the front seat. Wiping them away you look out the windshield hoping he’d come back. You see the lady from the waiting room creep up. You smile at her but shake your head. In silent communication she understands and walks away with a small wave.

The folder sits in your lap mocking you for screwing up so badly. Jo’s words reply in your head. Don’t mess this up. Rafe’s been being so patient with you pushing aside his own insecurities and problems. But all you side was take and take. You don’t blame him for giving up but selfishly you wanted him to fight.

But now you're alone again.

Your phone starts to ring and on the off chance it's him you check. The screen shows that it’s Jo so you let it ring. She’ll probably think you’re still in your appointment. Once the tears stop you will yourself to open the folder. Inside sits two different piles of papers. Both are neatly put into their own folders.The left slot has a real estate folder with the Cameron logo on it. Confused as to why he would give you his work stuff you open it. Looking at the listing it feels familiar. Scanning the photos you recognize it when Rafe did a weekend getaway with you and Vi. 

Shifting through the pile you see the mortgage and deed to the house. On the bottom of one of the papers is Rafe’s signature. Looking at the paper closer it shows he bought the house. Along with it are notes and sketches on remodels he wanted done. Some show an extended house for a playroom and three extra bedrooms. There was one for a greenhouse that was marked with your name with a heart next to it. One of the new extra rooms was marked nursery with a question mark next to it. Hell, even peaches had her own room.

Dropping the papers you hyperventilate at the slow crawling realization that he bought this house for you. Taking a deep breath you steady yourself to look at the other set. Sitting perfectly on the right side was a black folder. Taking it out of the slot you open it to see court paper. With shaky hands you pick them up and look at them to confirm what you see. He had papers drawn up to adopt Vi. Reading over it you can’t grasp it. He wants to adopt Vi and be a family. And you ruined it.

The last page is disconnected from the others and when you move it you see it’s not printed. In messy handwriting you see a letter. Just by the writing you know it’s from Rafe. He has the classic boy writing where you have to try hard to even read what he wrote.

From the moment I first met you I knew that was it. There was just something that dragged me in even if you kept telling me to run. Maybe it was your smile or laugh that you can’t help but pass on. Or even the way you never judged me even when I gave you every reason to. But I know I fell in love the moment I laid eyes on you. You looked at me like you saw me for who I really am. There was never a learning curve with you because you just understood me. Every moment that I’ve had with you and Vi has made me feel more at peace than I’ve ever felt. The two of you are my true North. I spent most of my life wishing on stars and I think they finally answered when I found you. The two of you are my family and I want this to be official. I never believed in love or fate before I met you but now I know you were what I’ve always been waiting for. I always felt like I was drowning in my own life until you came around. I feel like I can finally breathe again and it’s because of you. You’ll always be the one.

Tears keep streaming down your face as everything falls back to your lap. Resting your head on the steering wheel you try to control your crying but it's useless. You’ve ruined everything. Everything just hurts as you realize you’ve lost him. You don’t want to go through this without him but he’s gone. The same panic feeling fills your chest again as you dial Jo’s number.

“Where are you? Kelce is going to drop me off to you.” Her words take you back but you don’t answer her question. “I fucked up and it just hurts.” You cry into the phone. “I know baby but it’s okay. Where are you?” You tell her that you’re still at the doctor's office. She stays on the phone with you as Kelce drives to you. Rafe called Kelce about what happened trying to talk to a friend without realizing Jo was with him.

When he realized he automatically hung up to call Topper. Which Jo knows because Topper called Kelce right after to get extra back up incase Rafe hadn’t called. “How did he sound?” Jo pauses not knowing what to say and you can hear Kelce scoff. “He wasn’t okay. Baby he’s really hurt, what did you say?”

You start crying again just thinking about how you just pushed him away. “He wanted me to stay but  couldn’t. It was just too much.” Your voice cracks between words. “I’m a terrible person and that's why this happened. I don’t deserve him.” You hang up not wanting Kelce to hear you cry, knowing he must hate you too.

It took another five minutes until Jo got there. You can see that she didn’t say bye to Kelce and went straight to you. She opens the car door pulling you out to give you a hug. Next she moves you to the passenger side to sit so she can drive. It’s silent on the way home besides her saying the neighbor was watching Vi. 

The house seems quiet without her in the house. Just adding to the emptiness you feel. “What happened?” Jo’s hand rests on your shoulder stopping you from walking away. “I lost the baby.” The heavy words taste like acid on your tongue. “Then I told him I needed space. He kept saying how he loves me and wants me to stay but I couldn’t. I pushed him away.” You fall into her arms crying.

She moves you to your room and lays you down. You cry into your pillow as she gets your heating pad to help with the pain. “I’m sure you two can figure it out. I get why you did it but I also understand his view.” You sniffle at her honestly, kind of appreciating it but not at the same time. I’m going to go get Vi and we can all have a nap.” She leaves you there in a hollow shell wondering why this all happened. But you know one thing.

Rafe is gone.

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[writingroom21]

Sweet Escape

Pairing: Rafe x single mom reader

Summary: Moving to Kildare with your best friend and daughter was the perfect move. The little island is perfect, the people are nice, and you are finally at peace. Then Rafe comes in with his perfect smile and charm, sweeping you off your feet. The only issue is if you are ready to let someone else in.

Warnings: This one is sad so sorry in advance, Miscarriage, let me know if I missed any

Wc: 7K

Chapter 14: Just Stay

series masterlist

“Okay you can do this.” 

You stare at your rearview window trying to talk yourself up. The building next to you seems so daunting. The last time you were here you were dating Rafe. Now you’re just the ex that's sulking around trying to talk to him. Looking over at the building windows panic fills you. Fuck you can’t do this. This was the fourth time you tried to come talk to him but each time you chickened out.

Jo is on the verge of telling Kelce just so Rafe can find out. A fact that she tells you each morning when you walk into the kitchen. If you come home today without telling him then she definitely will. A tap on the window scares you. Your heart is pounding as you look to the left to see Rafe standing there. 

His blue eyes stare into you but the rest of his face seems closed off. You give him a nervous smile and it kind of breaks him. The window rolls down, taking away the last bit of separation you had. “You’ve been coming around.” He points it out, not harshly but it feels like it. You swallow the lump in your throat so you can just spit the words out. “Yeah we need to talk.”

He walks around to the other side and gets in the car. “I miss you.” He doesn’t look at you when you say it. The side of his face makes it hard to see how he is feeling. But you are guessing he’s upset. “I’m pregnant.” You don’t know why you didn’t say it back. All you could think about is that if you don’t say it now you won’t say it at all. Your heart is racing as you wait for him to say something. His head turns to you slowly.

The way the sun shines down highlights the tears in Rafe’s eyes. “You’re pregnant.” People walk by giving you a momentary distraction. Reaching into the back seat you grab your purse to pull out the pregnancy tests. Three tests all showing the same result sit in your hands. Outside chatter seeps its way into the car filling the silence you’re sitting in. One of his hands reaches out and takes a test out of your hand. 

You watch as he examines the stick with no emotion on his face. Flashes of Theo come flooding back. “You’re getting rid of it right.” Your head snaps back to Rafe who's staring at you. “Excuse me?” No, you will have the same experience twice. His hand reaches back out to you and grabs yours. You try to snatch it back but he won't let go.

“You’re keeping it right?” His eyes are shining in the light right now. A stray tear threatens to fall from his left eye. “Please keep the baby. I’ll be there in any way that you want. But please don’t take this from me too.”  You sit there in shock at the man sitting in front of you. He lowers his head and brings your joint hand so he can rest on them. His shoulders shake as he cries. 

Looking up at the roof of your car, you try to keep your emotions in check. Which was a total fail because you can feel the tears coming. Resting a hand behind his head you rake your fingers through his hair. “I’m keeping it.” Slowly his head lifts up with him sniffling. His face lights up in pure joy. Probably the first time since you broke with him that he actually felt happy.

Actually he felt this happy when he saw you from his car walking out the courthouse with a huge smile. The only real times he felt good about himself or life in general is tied to you and Violet.​​ This just adds to another moment. It doesn’t matter if you decide to get back together with him or not. Just knowing he has a chance to get his family back even just in a small way is worth it. 

His next actions were conducted in a haze of excitement. He grabs your face and kisses you. Maybe it was a freak accident but the kiss shocked you. As in actually gave you an electric shock. He pulls away slightly and smiles. “We’re having a baby.” His nose nuzzles against yours. “We’re parents again.” The softness of the again made your heart squeeze. You start to smile and nod along. “We’re having a baby.”

He kisses you again and plasters a bunch of kisses across your face. “Come on, get out. We are going in my car.” You squint your eyes at him. Confused, you probe him for more information. “We need to celebrate.” He grabs your hand and places a kiss on it before getting out. Walking over to your side he helps you out and waits for you to lock it. 

“I’m a dad again.”

Looking back at him you see a huge smile on his face. He’s telling a random lady who’s walking by with her dog. “Good for you.” She smiles at him and extends it to you before walking away. Riding the high, Rafe drags you to his car to get you food. Which was a great call since you were hungry. You expected it to be weird sitting across from each other. In reality it was a bit awkward  at first. Then it was like everything went back to normal.

Everything around you just seemed brighter.

By the time the check came you felt like no time had passed. You both sit there not wanting to get up. “When can I see Vi?” The question wasn’t surprising but you were hoping he wouldn’t mention it. When you look at him, he’s twisting the wrapper of his straw. “I have an appointment on Thursday. We can take her to get ice cream after.” Rafe’s eyes light up as relief floods his system.

Taking a chance, he grabs your hand and presses a kiss to your fingers. “I miss you.” He uses present tense like you're not sitting in front of him. Not I’ve missed you but like he still yearns for something. Maybe he’s right. There’s a part of you that feels like you don’t deserve him. He’s done so much for you with the whole Theo situation. Then you threw him to the side like he meant nothing.

You feel guilty that you could hurt someone that you love. “I miss you too.” His thumb rubs against yours and you both just stare at each other. Things are not going to go back to where they were instantly. But at least this is a start to getting back there. 

The ride back to your car was kind of silent. The realization that you’re back in each other’s life is big. Not only that, it’s due to having a baby. It’s weird thinking that you're right back to where you were as a teen. But this time you finally have someone who’s in it with you. Honestly you’re on cloud 9 just being next to him and feeling his hands on you again. 

It was starting to get dark when you got to your car. Rafe walked you to the drivers side, stopping you before you got in. You look at him waiting for him to say something but he doesn’t. His left hand cups your cheek and he leans down to kiss you. The kiss lasted a few seconds before he pulled away while clearing his throat. “Can I text you before the appointment?”

It kind of breaks you that he’s asking for permission. “Of course.” With a little nod he backs away and watches you drive off. You’re riding high the whole way home. As soon as you open the door Jo comes rushing over and hugs you. “Where have you been? You weren’t at the shop and I was looking for you everywhere.” You hug her back, giving her a big squeeze. “I was with Rafe.” You pull back with a smile but it slightly fades when you see her puffy eyes. 

“What’s wrong?” You toss your shoes on the shoe rack by the front door and walk with her to the couch. Vi is playing on the floor with some dolls so some relief floods you. Jo throws herself on the couch, grabbing a cushion to place it on her lap. “Had to take nana to the doctors today and she’s sick.” You sit down next to her and wrap her in your arms. “Is June okay?”

She sniffles and nods. “Yeah they gave her some meds so she should be good. It just scared me.” Toys clutter together as Vi throws them aside to join the hug. Tiny arms wrap themselves around Jo’s neck. The action makes her laugh. “June’s going to be okay. If the doctors weren’t worried then we shouldn’t.” Jo takes a moment just hugging Vi close to her chest. “How did it go with you know who?”

You take this as a sign to change the subject. “Good he’s going to the appointment with me.” Her head picks up and she puts Vi back down so she can go play. “That’s supposed to be our thing.” She whines while closing her eyes. She rolls them and sighs. “I’m excited for the both of you.” She smiles at you and gives you a nudge. “Another little Vi running around is gonna be nice.”

“It’s going to be a boy. I feel it.”

The rest of the night you two chatter about what a new baby means for the house. June is overjoyed thinking about a new bundle of joy. “I swear I’m going to smother that child.” Her pure joy just made you feel good. She didn’t stay long but it was nice seeing that she’s happy as well. Vi was clueless about everything but caught onto the word baby. Luckily she thought she’d gotten a new baby doll.

Which now that you think about it is not a bad idea. Maybe it will make her warm up to the sibling idea. There’s a smile on your face that just won’t seem to leave. You went to bed with it and woke back up with a smile. Your morning was normal. You got Vi ready and went to the shop.

Sarah was working today and decided to open the store early. When you get there she already took inventory and restocked everything. “There was a package for you so I left it on your desk.” She carries a few pots to the back shelf and arranges them around. The curtains open up and John B walks outs along with the rest of their friends. “Sorry we stopped by before we head off to fish.” Pope tries to explain as if they are doing something wrong.

You giggle and wave them off. “Don’t worry I don’t mind. Never going to say no to extra hands.” Kiara smiles as she looks around the shop. “Ever think about growing vegetables in the green house in the back?” You tilt your head at her and think about the idea. “You can sell them to the market down the street just like the flowers.” Sarah pipes up. You can see where this is going. 

“If you’re up for it you have the go ahead.” Kiara and Sarah smile at each other and squeal. Kiara goes to say something again but you beat her to it. “Yes, that means you’re an employee. Just let me know your availability.” Both girls jump into each other's arms, hugging each other tight. Vi runs up to them to hug their legs wanting to be included. Sarah picks her up and spins her around. 

Kiara turns to you and goes over to give you a hug. “Thank you so much. I can start right now.” You hug her back. “Enjoy your fishing day. You can start tomorrow if you want.” The group of friends chat for a bit longer. They all take turns holding Vi, passing her in a circle until they leave. After counting the register you head back to the office and see an envelope on your desk. That must be what Sarah was talking about.

You can hear her and Vi singing to some Justin Bieber song. Placing the money bag down you pick it up to see it from Theo. Opening it slowly, you take the papers out to find documents. In fine print he signed over his rights to Violet claiming to never wanting contact. Sitting in the desk chair you reread the papers.

You’re free

Pulling out your phone you pull up one contact. You read this morning's conversation. A simple good morning fills your screen along with your reply and short conversation. Crafting up a text you find the courage to send it. Theo finally signed over his rights. As if he was waiting for your text, he sends you one back right away. That’s amazing! Seems like there’s a lot to celebrate this week. A smile creeps its way onto your face as you read the message.

How should we do that?

You cringe after you send the message. Hovering over it you debate on unsending it. Then three little dots appear. A date. It was simple but it made your stomach flutter. The feeling gets more intense but you get distracted with a knock. “What’s got you all smiley?” Sarah is standing in the doorway. With the way she’s looking at you it seems like she senses something.

“Theo finally signed his rights over.” The perfect excuse to be extra happy right now. She lets out a scream and rushes over to you. You let out a huff of air when she squeezes you tight. “Yay! I’m so happy for you.” You hug her back tightly. Even though Wheezie and Sarah are still around, you felt like there was this disconnect. In the end you have to face the fact you hurt their brother. At least they understood where you were coming from.

It’s nice having her comfort in this moment. “Okay I’ll go start on some orders so we can celebrate for lunch.” Her bright smile makes you smile more. There’s another flutter in your stomach, only this time it’s stronger. Ignoring the feeling you text Rafe back quickly confirming you like the idea. You go along with the day enjoying lunch as they gave you extra pickles. 

You were exhausted by the time you got home at the end of the day. You made a lemon chicken pasta while Jo made an on theme dessert of lemon drizzle cupcakes. Vi devoured her meal before taking her sweet time with the cupcake. June picks at her meal not really interested in it. “I’m sorry sweetie just can’t keep solids down today. It’s delicious nonetheless.” Jo sends you a look but you dismiss it so she’s not worried.

Jo washes the dishes while you go to the bathroom to shower. You noticed some spotting on your underwear but brushed it aside. When you were pregnant with Vi you had spotting for a while before it went away. Your nightly routine goes the same way it always does. Next you give Vi a bath before putting her to bed. 

“Cupcake?” 

Jo hands you one when you step out of the room. You take it and take a bite enjoying the lemon flavor. She looks apprehensive as she shifts her feet. The two of you stand in the hallway. “What’s wrong?” She looks at you wondering if she should say what her brain is telling her. “I know that the baby changes things but I want you to be happy okay.” Puzzled, you give her a look before dragging her to your room. Walking past the piles of clothes you place the cupcake on the nightstand and sit on the bed.

Jo follows along and sits next to you. “I’m lost.” She sighs, not knowing how to go about this. “You’re my best friend and I want you to know that I love you.” Nerves start to fill your body as to what can possibly be worrying her. Usually she’s straight forward but right now she’s hiding something. “Don’t blow this second chance please. He loves you so much and Vi loves him. I want you to be happy and that’s with him.” 

You don’t say anything for a second and she’s ready to do damage control. “I love you and living with you. But I don’t want to hold you back. When you moved in with us I promised to protect you. That includes protecting you from yourself.” She scoots closer and takes one of your hands. “This is the happiest I’ve ever seen you and I’ve known you my whole life. I can’t let you lose that.” 

You hug her. She’s always been your biggest support but it’s more than that. Through everything she’s been your sister. “You don’t have to worry. I think Rafe and I are on the same page.” She giggles. When you pull back you wipe away her tears. “Good because it's been tough seeing you like this. I’m glad things are going back to normal.”

You agree. You’re very happy that things are getting normal again. Sure under circumstances you didn’t see coming but it’s happening. Which is all you could think about as you tried to sleep and the next day. Your thoughts were occupied by the fact you and Rafe are starting a family. A nervous notion you dwell on as you drive to the appointment. Rafe had a morning meeting so he’s meeting you there.

Parking your car close to the entrance, you wait to see Rafe’s truck. A silver car parks next to you ruining the side to side parking you set up. Which is fine since there’s a spot in front of you. To kill some time you scroll on your phone. After ten minutes a truck parks in front of you. Looking up you see Rafe’s smiling face beaming at you. Getting out of the car you meet him in front of the cars. 

Rafe bends to give you a kiss which you don’t protest. “Hi flower girl.” You giggle at the nickname. “Hey space boy.” The parking lot is kind of full so Rafe blocks you off from any traffic. His hand finds yours and laces your fingers together. His thumb grazes against yours helping soothe the racing in your heart. Stealing a glance you see that his mouth is in a fine line. A tell that he has when he’s nervous.

“You okay?” His eyes meet yours and he smiles. “I’m nervous. I was lucky that with Vi I skipped all the nerve racking stuff.” You nod your head understanding where he’s coming from. It’s scary dealing with all of the details that comes with being pregnant. “Not saying I wouldn’t have enjoyed it. I wish I did get that but at least we get to do it again from the start.” The automatic doors open letting you into the building.

To the left there’s a huge board with all of the doctors' names. Finding your doctor you let him squirm for a moment. “I’m glad I get to do it again with you.” When you turn around he lifts his head up to look at you. “Welcome to the crazy world of parenthood.” He smiles as you both joke on your way up to the office.

Stepping into the waiting room there’s already a couple there. The woman looks around seven months pregnant. Based on her face she is counting down the days until the baby is out. You have Rafe sit down while you check in. You give the receptionist your information before going to sit back down. 

Rafe is sitting near the couple chatting to the guy as the lady listens. “We actually have a three year old at home. But this is my first time going through all of this.” The man pats Rafe on the shoulder as he looks at what you assume is his wife. “We have an almost four years old at home. We should set up a play date sometime.” Sitting down next to Rafe he introduces all of you. The lady that you now know is Jen smiles at you. Her husband Frank continues to chat with Rafe, pulling out his phone to what you presume is to exchange numbers. 

“How far along are you?” Jen asks as she starts to fan herself. She’s probably having heat flashes now. You got them at the end of your pregnancy and they were not fun. “Around 3 months I think. I only found out recently so this is our first check up.” She laughs and frantically points to her stomach. “Surprise pregnancy. Didn’t know until I was almost six months, can you believe it?”

Your eyes widen and you hear the boy's conversation halt. Looking over at Rafe you can see he has the same expression. “Thought I had my period because of spotting. Should’ve known better.” You place a hand on your chest from the pure shock. Sure you’ve heard of cryptic pregnancies but this is the first you’ve seen it. “Same with me. I’ve been spotting for a while and thought nothing of it.”

She moves over to sit by you and chats until she’s called. “I’m sure Frank will reach out. He’s obsessed with getting Nicky friends.” SHe gives you a wave as they both leave. “Did she just say Nicky? Did I just set up a date?” He looks mortified which makes you laugh. A nurse comes and calls for you so you help pick him up.

“Their toddlers, Rafe. You can worry about that when she’s older.” The older lady gestures for you to enter one of the neat rooms. The pale yellow walls give a small sense of joy. Much better than white walls that make you think you’re losing your mind. “One of the nurses will be in shortly to go over history. Then the doctor will be in.” She points to the robe and tells you to put it on in the meantime. 

You change into the garments and sit down on the papered chair. Rafe is walking around the room looking at all of the decorations. There’s a wooden board on the wall showing all of the stages of dilations. In shock he points to ten centimeters then back at you. “Is that?” He doesn’t know how to phrase the question so he stops.

“Yup but that's just the head. The shoulders are wider.” He gulps at the thought of it which makes him shiver. “Sorry.” He mumbles while looking at a fetus replica. Reaching out one of his fingers runs over it. “I can’t wait to feel the baby kick.” You enjoy watching him being so open. Everything he says just leaks with excitement. It warms you knowing that you aren’t alone in your happiness.

A knock on the door makes both of you look over as a nurse peaks in. “Can I come in?” You wave her in and Rafe takes the seat next to you. She looks over some paperwork as she’s picking up a needle. “Okay I just need to draw up some blood to confirm you’re pregnant. Then I’ll ask you some questions and start the scan.” Rafe holds your hand to give you some sort of support. The  rubber band constricts your arm giving the nurse the perfect vein to prick.

The tube fills with crimson as the nurse chats with you. “When was your last period?” Thinking back to it you realize it’s been a while. “In December. I’ve had spotting so I thought I was having light periods.” She nods and takes the needle out before bandaging you up. She removes the rubber band and places it on her cart. Writing down your she simultaneously puts your sample away.

“That’s normal. A lot of women get implantation bleeding after becoming pregnant. I saw you already have a child, did you get it in your first pregnancy?” You confirm that you did. “As long as it eventually goes away everything should be fine. The scan can also clear things up.” She asks you for the dates of your period before going to give your sample to the lab.

She came back quickly setting up the sonogram to get a better look. Laying back you watch as she places the covering over the wand and places lube on it. “What’s that?” Rafe leans a bit closer to you trying not to sound too dumb. “It’s a wand for internal sonograms.” He give you a look of ‘what the fuck.’ The coolness makes you twitch, then the slight discomfort gets you squirming. 

Rafe holds your hand squeezing it until you open your eyes again. The screen initially was more towards you but it seems like it was moved. You look at the nurse waiting for her to say something. She’s typing on the computer before briefly pausing. Casting you a glance she adverts her eyes and randomly taps on the side of the computer. “Stupid screen. They’ve been giving us trouble the last few weeks.” 

The force of the wand being removed makes you lean up. “How did the baby look?” She keeps typing, not really acknowledging what you said. “Sorry I can’t really see anything on this screen, let me go get a new one.” Taking the computer with her, she rushes out of the room. “Maybe we can find a different office. You know, get one that has computers that work.” Rafe’s speaking but you aren’t really paying attention.

The doctor comes into a room, pushing a computer right next to you. “Hi I’m doctor Martin.” Her calming voice slows your heart rate just slightly. “Let me just take a look. The nurse you had is new and it can be tricky with the computers we have.” Leaning back down, you adjust yourself on the chair. A sheet is placed over your lower half and the doctor opens the robe some more. “I thought you had to use the other one?” 

Dr. Martin squirts some gel on your lower abdomen and grabs a different wand. “We can but this one works just as well. We couldn’t really get a read on it so I’m trying a different wand.” The wand rubs the gel all over your stomach. Rafe places a kiss to the side of your head but you just focus on the doctor's typing. “Do we get one of those pictures to take home?” Her face when he asks the question gives something away.

With a sigh she wipes off the wand and puts it back on the rack. She cleans off your abdomen and you sit up. Rafe is looking between you and the doctor to understand what he’s missing. “When our nurse was doing her scan she noticed that the gestational sac looked a bit small.” She pauses and pulls out your test results to look at your test results. “Your test results show a higher level hCG but it doesn’t match your last period.”

Rafe shakes his head not getting what she’s saying. “So she got the dates mixed up. She’s not that far along then.” It feels like the air is restricted. Your lungs are burning from the lack of oxygen but your body can’t catch up. Rafe is trying to ask the doctor what she’s trying to say but you try to get one ounce of air. “I’m so sorry. The ultrasound shows no signs of development. I truly wish that this was a different outcome.”

You start to sob at the reality that's washing over you. Clutching your stomach you move to the side to sob into Rafe’s shoulder. “It’s possible your spotting was due to the passing of the embryo.” Another sob comes crashing out of you. Rafe wraps his arms around you pulling you closer to his chest. “I don’t get it. Maybe it's just your computer since they weren’t working.” It’s still not fully registering with him.

“The computers are fine. Nurses aren’t allowed to make that call and that’s why she pulled me in.” There’s a moment where all you can hear is the blood flowing through your veins. Everything is drowned out by the sound of your heart beating. A hand is placed on your leg and you look to see Dr. Martin is staring at you. With solemn eyes she hands you a few sonograms. 

“I thought you’d like to have this. Here’s some flyers as well. I’ll give you some time.” The photo stares back at you showing the tiniest little freckle in a sea of darkness. Rafe's finger touches the spot. “Is that?” All you can do is nod as you sob. He holds you tight, nuzzling his head in your neck. Droplets hit your shoulder as he silently cries with you. His hand reaches for your head to scratch your scalp.

It always calmed you down before and he hopes it helps this time. Eventually the tears stop coming and you both just sit there. WIthout saying anything you get dressed. Both of you walk out hating the feeling of everyone staring. Dr. Martin stops you on your way out. “Here’s a prescription for some heavy strength tylenol. It will help with the pain.” She hands you the slip and looks at Rafe. “I do recommend looking at the flyers. Again I’m so sorry.”

“Why did it happen?” She braces herself like she was expecting it. Rafe sounds so confused and he just wants an answer. “A lot of women miscarry in the first trimester. It can be from many different reasons, sadly it just happens.” That’s what makes it worse. There was a chance it wouldn’t have happened. But once again you are happy in your life and it’s taken away. Maybe this was a sign.

This isn’t supposed to be how your life is. The universe is punishing you for taking something that isn’t yours. Rafe holds your hand all the way to the parking lot in a state of numbness just like you. He tries dragging you to his car but you pull away. “Come on, I should drive you home. I’ll get your car later.” All of your nerves feel on fire. Your chest keeps getting tighter and you just want everything to stop.

“I think I’m just going to go home.” Pointing to your car, you try to convey the message that you are leaving. In panic motions, Rafe races ahead of you to stop you from going further. “Woah, listen lets just go home and take today to process everything.” His voice is hoarse with the plea. Tears start to build up in your eyes. The familiar lump in your throat from giving him a chance to keep talking.

“Don’t make us go through this alone.” The parking lot feels more empty than it really is. It feels like you’re not even in any realm of reality right now. “Listen, I'm just as shocked and hurt as you are. But I just can’t do this.” The once blue eyes you knew shatter. You watch as he physically breaks in front of you, tears welling in his eyes. “Is being with me and starting a family really that awful for you? Did I ever mean anything to you or were you just using me as a placeholder?” You take a step forward reaching out to him but he steps back. “Rafe.” He shakes his head while his hands rub his face. 

“I just lost a baby. I need time.” His head snaps up and there’s fury in his eyes. You’ve never seen this much hatred on him ever. Especially not to you. “Don’t you fucking dare.” His voice is like ice. You physically take a step back on instinct trying to create distance. “We. WE LOST A FUCKING KID NOT YOU.” His nostrils flare along with his jaw that he keeps clenching. “I’m not that fucking deadbeat that left you. Stop trying to pretend like I’m evil to make yourself feel better.”

There are people walking to the cars who rush by. Not wanting to get in the middle of everything. The couple from the waiting room stand by their car making sure things don’t escalate. “We just found out we lost our kid and you’re alreadying leaving. Would you even have come back if you weren’t pregnant?” The question startles you because that’s the last thing on your mind. “You always meant something to me. I lo-“ He cuts you off before you can finish you sentence. 

“I don’t want to fucking hear it. Save the bullshit for the next guy who falls for it. I loved you, the first person I ever felt that with and you fucked me over.” Tears start to gather on your waterline ready to overflow. “The water works really? Wow what a fucking show.” He starts to slowly clap his hands, applauding you for the act. “Rafe, I'm trying to be serious. This is hard for me too. I don’t know how to feel right now. I just need to be by myself.” You wipe the tears from your face. “I really wanted this baby and now that’s all gone.”

“EXACTLY. The family we wanted just got destroyed for the second time. You already left me the first time so stay.” His eyes are red and now are becoming puffy. “Rafe.” He raises a hand to stop you. “If you leave, that's it. I can’t have you break me again.” There’s a lifeless look in his eyes. It’s as if all the light in them died. You go to reach for him again but he pushes your hands off of you. He already knows what you’re about to do.

“Wanna know the worst part about all of this? I really do love Vi. I didn’t just lose you or the baby. I lost my daughter and I hate you for that.” A sob wrecks through your body. You feel as if you could collapse on the ground from how weak you feel. “Don’t say that.” He walks over to his truck and you think he’s going to leave you there. Then he comes back with a folder and hands it to you. “If you didn’t want anymore kids I could have lived with that. You and Vi were enough for me. Thank you for showing me that I still don’t deserve love.” He laughs after his sentence backing up as he looks you in the eyes. “Honestly started to believe I was wrong.” 

You stand there watching as he gets into his truck and leaves. Through teary eyes you find your car and sit in the front seat. Wiping them away you look out the windshield hoping he’d come back. You see the lady from the waiting room creep up. You smile at her but shake your head. In silent communication she understands and walks away with a small wave.

The folder sits in your lap mocking you for screwing up so badly. Jo’s words reply in your head. Don’t mess this up. Rafe’s been being so patient with you pushing aside his own insecurities and problems. But all you side was take and take. You don’t blame him for giving up but selfishly you wanted him to fight.

But now you're alone again.

Your phone starts to ring and on the off chance it's him you check. The screen shows that it’s Jo so you let it ring. She’ll probably think you’re still in your appointment. Once the tears stop you will yourself to open the folder. Inside sits two different piles of papers. Both are neatly put into their own folders.The left slot has a real estate folder with the Cameron logo on it. Confused as to why he would give you his work stuff you open it. Looking at the listing it feels familiar. Scanning the photos you recognize it when Rafe did a weekend getaway with you and Vi. 

Shifting through the pile you see the mortgage and deed to the house. On the bottom of one of the papers is Rafe’s signature. Looking at the paper closer it shows he bought the house. Along with it are notes and sketches on remodels he wanted done. Some show an extended house for a playroom and three extra bedrooms. There was one for a greenhouse that was marked with your name with a heart next to it. One of the new extra rooms was marked nursery with a question mark next to it. Hell, even peaches had her own room.

Dropping the papers you hyperventilate at the slow crawling realization that he bought this house for you. Taking a deep breath you steady yourself to look at the other set. Sitting perfectly on the right side was a black folder. Taking it out of the slot you open it to see court paper. With shaky hands you pick them up and look at them to confirm what you see. He had papers drawn up to adopt Vi. Reading over it you can’t grasp it. He wants to adopt Vi and be a family. And you ruined it.

The last page is disconnected from the others and when you move it you see it’s not printed. In messy handwriting you see a letter. Just by the writing you know it’s from Rafe. He has the classic boy writing where you have to try hard to even read what he wrote.

From the moment I first met you I knew that was it. There was just something that dragged me in even if you kept telling me to run. Maybe it was your smile or laugh that you can’t help but pass on. Or even the way you never judged me even when I gave you every reason to. But I know I fell in love the moment I laid eyes on you. You looked at me like you saw me for who I really am. There was never a learning curve with you because you just understood me. Every moment that I’ve had with you and Vi has made me feel more at peace than I’ve ever felt. The two of you are my true North. I spent most of my life wishing on stars and I think they finally answered when I found you. The two of you are my family and I want this to be official. I never believed in love or fate before I met you but now I know you were what I’ve always been waiting for. I always felt like I was drowning in my own life until you came around. I feel like I can finally breathe again and it’s because of you. You’ll always be the one.

Tears keep streaming down your face as everything falls back to your lap. Resting your head on the steering wheel you try to control your crying but it's useless. You’ve ruined everything. Everything just hurts as you realize you’ve lost him. You don’t want to go through this without him but he’s gone. The same panic feeling fills your chest again as you dial Jo’s number.

“Where are you? Kelce is going to drop me off to you.” Her words take you back but you don’t answer her question. “I fucked up and it just hurts.” You cry into the phone. “I know baby but it’s okay. Where are you?” You tell her that you’re still at the doctor's office. She stays on the phone with you as Kelce drives to you. Rafe called Kelce about what happened trying to talk to a friend without realizing Jo was with him.

When he realized he automatically hung up to call Topper. Which Jo knows because Topper called Kelce right after to get extra back up incase Rafe hadn’t called. “How did he sound?” Jo pauses not knowing what to say and you can hear Kelce scoff. “He wasn’t okay. Baby he’s really hurt, what did you say?”

You start crying again just thinking about how you just pushed him away. “He wanted me to stay but  couldn’t. It was just too much.” Your voice cracks between words. “I’m a terrible person and that's why this happened. I don’t deserve him.” You hang up not wanting Kelce to hear you cry, knowing he must hate you too.

It took another five minutes until Jo got there. You can see that she didn’t say bye to Kelce and went straight to you. She opens the car door pulling you out to give you a hug. Next she moves you to the passenger side to sit so she can drive. It’s silent on the way home besides her saying the neighbor was watching Vi. 

The house seems quiet without her in the house. Just adding to the emptiness you feel. “What happened?” Jo’s hand rests on your shoulder stopping you from walking away. “I lost the baby.” The heavy words taste like acid on your tongue. “Then I told him I needed space. He kept saying how he loves me and wants me to stay but I couldn’t. I pushed him away.” You fall into her arms crying.

She moves you to your room and lays you down. You cry into your pillow as she gets your heating pad to help with the pain. “I’m sure you two can figure it out. I get why you did it but I also understand his view.” You sniffle at her honestly, kind of appreciating it but not at the same time. I’m going to go get Vi and we can all have a nap.” She leaves you there in a hollow shell wondering why this all happened. But you know one thing.

Rafe is gone.

@haruvalentine4321 @namelesslosers @ijustwanttoreadlols @drewsphswife @corpsebridenightamare @actorslover @juniperbaies @fionaswifeyy @dark1paradise @stoned-writer @notafairyteen @theoraekenslover @rafedaddy01 @rrafeswhore @10ava01 @selfcontollover07 @akobx @rafesbabygirlx @lolasangelz @emmaaas-posts @anacamofficial @theoraekenslover @drewsphswife @illicitpages @angelteardropss @solaceluna let me know if you want to be added!

[writingroom21]

New part of sweet escape tomorrow!

[writingroom21]

It’s just a baby what’s the worst that could happen🤭

Girls On Film

pairing: pornstar!Rafe x pornstar!Reader

Summary: Running away from home to become a pornstar was never in your books. Having to move in with some asshole wan't in it either. Surely living in a house with someone you dislike can't be hard. It's just work, that's all it is. Right?

Warnings: Mentions of abuse (Just a slap), let me if I missed any

Wc:4.5K

Chapter 11: This is Home

series master list

Twelve

Twelve videos play in the back of your mind like an endless movie. After lunch with Liz you went back to the house and pulled out your computer. It took a while but you eventually found the videos buried under his page. She was good. You fell down the rabbit hole of looking her up and you now know everything. She’s gone through three different hair colors: brunette, blue, and blonde. There are a lot of videos on her page but only twelve have Rafe in it. 

What could have happened within twelve video’s to blow everything up?

Every time you see him all you can picture is the way he was with her. You don’t know why you keep torturing yourself with it but you do. It’s like the videos are taunting you just sitting there to make your day worse. It’s gotten to the point where Rafe knows something is up but has been waiting for you to say something first. Which is never going to happen.

“You’ve been quiet recently.” The two of you are lying in bed not wanting to get up. Last night you went out with Amelia and her girlfriend. It was late when you had gotten back so waking up early was hard. “You’ve been chatty recently.” Rafe smiles at your comeback, letting out a little chuckle. Scooting closer, he lays his arm over your waist. “Compensating the fact you’ve been radio silent.” 

“Liz and I ran into Beth at lunch last week.” His fingers rub up and down your spine. You watch his face not really seeing a change. “Is that a new worker or something?” It doesn’t seem like he’s hiding anything. You’ve seen him lie before and he’s not that great at it. “No, an old one.” It took a moment but it finally clicked.

“Fuck is she coming back?” His fingers stop moving causing your heart rate to pick up. “Do you want her to come back?” There’s silence as you wait for your answer. Rafe uses his pointer and thumb to move your chin so you are looking at him. “Star, are you jealous?” A small smirk plays on his face but it’s not his usual one. You scoff and go to brush his hand away but he won’t let you.

“No, I don’t want her to come back.” When you still don’t look at him he shuffles closer. “I was happy when she left. She was practically obsessed with me to the point I was ready to leave. She just beat me to it.” Your eyes flicker to him. “Really?” Being so close to each other, you can see the flecks of gold in his eyes.

“At first it was cool but then she wanted to continue outside of filming.” You take a deep breath knowing where this goes. “Slept with her like three times before realizing that was a mistake. I called it off and she kind of went crazy. Then a month or two later she was gone so never had to worry about it again.” The two of you sit there for what feels like forever just looking at each other.

Your chest feels like it’s being crushed with each breath. “That must’ve sucked.” You flip onto your back so you stare at that ceiling trying to figure out what to say. “That’ll never happen with us, you know.” The bed dips beside you as Rafe sits up, leaning a bit to be in your view. “Yeah because you aren’t a psycho like her. That’s why I like you and why things are different.” He leans down, pressing a kiss to your lips.

You get lost in the feeling, letting the words sink in. Was he trying to tell you something or are you ready too much into it? When he pulls away you try to chase his lips but he gets up. Come on, we told Wheezie we would go out today and it’s already ten o’clock. You squeal as he pulls your legs making you lay on the edge of the bed. He pulls you up so you’re sitting and he’s between your legs. “You know Wheezie and the girl down the street became friends.”

Rafe kisses the side of your mouth moving along until he reaches your jaw. “She asked if Wheeze wanted to have a slumber party tonight.” You giggle when he kisses underneath your jaw. “Yeah? A house all to ourselves doesn’t sound bad.” You moan as he sucks lightly on your neck. He hums before kissing the spot right below your ear. “Gotta lot planned for you so hurry up.”

He leaves you on the bed and heads over to the bathroom. SItting there for a moment you collect yourself. So what if he slept with Beth because he’s right. Things are different and nothings going to change that.

“I want to go see the bamboo sharks.” Wheeze is slightly ahead of the two of you. She maneuvers her way around the sea of people kind of disappearing from view. “Well that didn’t take long.” Rafe wraps an arm around your shoulder pulling you close into his side. “Didn’t take her as a shark girl.” A bunch of kids run past the two of you, one of them bumping into your leg.

“Sorry about that. They're just super excited.” A woman you assume is their mum yells as she runs past you to catch up to them. “Gosh I could never have that many kids. I would lose my mind.” You watch as the mom struggles to group the five kids. “You want kids?” He moves you in front of him when you get to the interactive exhibit. 

Wheezie is off to the side with her hand in the water touching the little sharks as they swim by. “Maybe someday. I’d like to have some in the future but who knows.” You shrug off the thought, not sure on how to feel. “What about you?” You look over your shoulder to see him looking at the display in front of the two of you.

“I don’t know. Never really saw myself having kids. Plus I’d probably be shit father just like mine.” He means it. There’s an edge to his voice telling you he believes those words. “Then why did Wheeze run to you when things got bad?” He shifts his gaze to you, shocked by the question. “What?”

“If you were really as bad as him, she wouldn’t have come to you. To me that shows you’d be a good dad. Also all parents have their faults, no one’s perfect.” Without thinking he just kisses you. More like making out with you for a second before remembering where he was. “Sorry.” He mumbles on your lips before pulling back. You clear your throat and smile at the older lady who is definitely side eyeing the two of you.

Rafe starts walking the two of you closer to where Wheezie is standing. A flash of Beth’s baby attacks your memories. The kid must be around four or five months old. If you do the math she would have still been working at the company. Which means she was still sleeping with Rafe. “What if you found out you had a secret baby out there. Would that change things?”

Your eyes bulge out after you finish speaking. Fuck you need to really think before talking. “Why are you pregnant?” Your head swivels to look at him. He’s watching you with a goofy grin trying not to laugh. Shoving him lightly you shift your gaze back to the miniature reef. “I guess it would be different.” His fingers graze the back of your neck. 

Using his grip he turns you around. “Just know if it's a boy, his name is Rafe jr.” He laughs at his own joke making it even more stupid. “Whatever like that would ever happen.” You push him off of you causing him to chase after you. He speed walks trying not to trample kids as you walk further away from him. 

“Oh come one. Junior would be cute and we can take him here.” When he reaches you, he picks you up, moving the two of you slightly away from everyone. “We can tell him how you surprised me right here.” He’s fighting back laughter with each word. “You’re so dumb just forget I said anything.” You giggle out as you roll your eyes. 

“Hey you were the one asking weird questions. You okay?” His left hand raises to your face. He cups your cheek letting his thumb stroke the skin. Maybe you’re over thinking everything. Yeah that’s exactly what you are doing. “I’m good. Just think junior really wants to see the jelly fish.” A grin spreads across his face and he shakes his head. “Look who’s the dumb one now.”

He brings you back over to where Wheezie is. “Come on, give the kids a chance.” The teenage girl huffs as she retracts her hands from the water. She wipes them off on her jeans before linking an arm through yours. “Fine but I think we should look at the seals.” She tries to drag you all there but Rafe redirects her to the tanks that have jellyfish. 

“Sorry kid, making a pitstop first.”

The three of you go around looking at all of the animals there. Wheezie throws out random facts and Rafe throws out some of his own. “Since when were you a marine biologist?” The tips of Rafe’s ears become red. He clears his throat and slows down his pace. Wheezie walks ahead of the two of you – giving you both privacy without realizing. 

“Uh, I liked the ocean when I was a kid. We had the marsh behind our house and I was always in it.” He places his hands in his pockets. In a way he looks like he’s trying to hide himself. “I used to read a lot of books about the ocean. Then whenever Wheeze or Sarah were upset I’d list off facts.” You smile at the mental image.

The picture of little Rafe comforting his younger sister with facts is sweet. “As Wheezie got older we bonded over it. Kinda our thing.” Who is this guy? You look over to Wheezie that's looking at the large wall of glass. She looks over at the two of you, giving you a smile before looking back. “I can go look around so you too get some time alone.”

Rafe turns you so you are looking at him. “Nah we like you around. Also it gets boring telling facts to someone who already knows.” You push his shoulder lightly but he catches your hand. Using his grip he pulls you closer, wrapping an arm around your waist. He looks at your lips and then back up to your eyes. 

“Are you going to kiss?” 

The two of you look to the right to see a little boy next to you. “My mommy and daddy kiss all the time.” He walks a little closer and you two step away from each other. “My name is Zack. You know my dad looks at my mom like that.” You two share a look of confusion. “Is she your girlfriend?” His little eyes stare up at the both of you with some type of look. 

“She is.” Zack smiles and gives Rafe a thumbs up. “She’s really pretty. You did a good job.” Rafe smiles and grabs your hand to give it a kiss. “She’s the best.” The little boy looks over his shoulder and points to a couple with a baby. “I should go. It’s my sister Emma’s first time here.” He runs off, waving as he trips over his foot. “I’m okay! Bye!” 

Rafe starts to walk off, saying something about Zack being adorable. But all you can think about is he said yes. He said that you were his girlfriend. The rest of the day you try to ignore the anxious nagging feeling in your stomach. He definitely said it to please the boy. Let’s face it Rafe doesn’t want anything serious. Which is totally fine.

“What do you want?” Rafe snaps you out of your thoughts and you look over at him. “What?” Does he know how you’re feeling? Then you realize you are already at the drive through. “Um the number seven with a dr.pepper.” Wheezie stumbles out her order before closing her eyes again. After the aquarium you all went walking around and looked at the shops that were around. Guess it must have tired her out.

The food comes out soon and you are on the road again. You all eat in silence while the radio softly plays music. The burger you had is soon gone and you are picking at the last of your fries. “I had fun today.” You look at Rafe and can see Wheezie sleeping in the back from the corner of your eye. “Me too.” His right hand reaches over the center counsel to hold your hand. A lump forms in your throat that you try to drown with dr.pepper. 

“I meant what I said to that kid, star. You’re mine.” Your eyes widen a bit and you look back to make sure Wheeze is still sleeping. “Rafe.” He cuts you off before you could keep speaking. “I like what we have. Everything feels different with you. I don't know how to explain it.” His hand squeezes yours a little tighter. “I get it.” Rafe spares you a glance before looking back at the road. 

“You do?” You nod your head before realizing he can’t see. Taking a deep breath you look at the road ahead of you. “Everything feels easy like it should be happening. It’s how I feel.” Rafe grins and kisses your hand. “So we’re on the same page?” You agree while trying to suppress a smile. “Yes we are.” You thought it would be weird if your feelings changed.

At first you thought Rafe was just some shallow guy. But now you see him way differently. He’s sweet when he wants to be. He makes you feel safe and seen, which is something that hasn’t happened in a long time. The car rolls to a stop at a red light and you take the opportunity. You grab the collar of his shirt and bring him in for a kiss. He gives in, kissing you harder and getting lost in it. The car behind you honks and you see that the light had turned green.

He drives the rest of the way home. You both chat about random things, mostly you begging him to tell you ocean facts. Wheezie wakes up right before you get home, joining in to tell you something about sharks. As Rafe is pulling up to the house you can see a car parked in the driveway. Wheezie sits up more, leaning forward to get a good look. “Isn’t that dad’s car?”

Her voice shakes as she speaks. Rafe doesn’t say anything as he parks and gets out of the car. You follow along and hand Wheeze the keys so she can go inside. She starts to walk to the door but the driver side door of the other car opens. “Honey pack your things and get in the car.”

Ward steps out trying to make his way over to his youngest child. Rafe gets in front of him to block his dad from walking closer. You walk over to where Rafe is not knowing what you should do. “Get inside the house.” Rafe doesn’t take his eyes off the older man as he speaks. “Your sister isn’t staying here. I let her throw her tantrum and now she needs to come home.” Wheezie stays at the front entrance watching what is unfolding in front of the two of you. 

“She doesn’t want to go with you. I’m not letting you take her.” Ward laughs, shaking his head while his hand runs through his beard. His hands rest on his hips as he looks back at Rafe. “You really think I’m going to let her keep staying here. A whore and a junkie, what a great example.” In a flash Rafe had his dad pressed against his car. Rafe’s hand rests on Ward's neck and his left hand is pointed at him.

“Talk about her like that again I fucking dare you.” You rush over trying to separate the two but Rafe doesn’t budge. “You’re a fuck up too. The only kid that is still around only tolerates you because you’re such a piece of shit. We’re screw ups because you’re one.” Ward’s nostrils flare and his eyes look cold. “I’ll call the cops. She’s still a minor and I can say you kidnapped her.” Your eyes widen as you look between the two of them.

“Rafe just let him go.” He listens but doesn’t back away. Ward takes a few deep breaths and clears his throat. “Dad hit me before I left. That’s why I came here.” All heads whip over to look at Wheezie who has tears in her eyes. “He was yelling at me over my grades, comparing me to Sarah. I yelled back and that’s when he hit me. All because I got one C.” Ward looks more pissed and he tries to take a step forward.

“That’s enough.” Rafe slams his dad back into the car. Ward tries to fight back but Rafe slams him into it again even harder. “You have two options. One I call the cops and I ruin your precious reputation. Or the smart option, you get the fuck out.” Rafe grabs Ward’s face moving it around lightly in a mocking way. “But I promise you the next time I see you I’ll make you regret it. Stay the hell away from Wheezie and don’t ever come around us again.”

Rafe backs away and grabs your hand to drag you into the house. When the door is locked he lets go of your hand and walks down the hall. You look out the window watching as Ward kicks his tires. He takes his phone out and calls someone. You can see him talking loudly before getting into the car. The black truck pulls out the driveway. 

Tears well in your eyes imagining how scared Wheezie must have felt. You walk down the halls and find your old bedroom door. Pressing your ears against the door you can hear Rafe talking to her lightly. Taking a step back you sit down right across the hall waiting until the door opens. You don’t want to interrupt them and you think she really needs her brother. 

After a while you hear footsteps and the door opens. Rafe steps out and quickly shuts the door behind him. “She’s sleeping.” You nod your head and look up at him. His eyes are rimmed with a crimson color. “I shouldn’t have left.” You rush to get up and embrace him in a hug. His arms wrap around your waist squeezing you tightly to him. “This wouldn’t have happened if I was still there.” He lets out a little sob, burying his head in your shoulder.

Slowly you help him find his room and lay down in the bed. He holds you close to him, running his fingers up and down your arm. “I shouldn’t have left.” You take a deep breath before speaking. “Would you have been happy if you stayed?” He laughs a little and answers no. “I would probably be dead by now if I stayed.” He goes quiet for a little.

“Was in the wrong crowd back home. Funny enough but Jared kinda saved me with this job.” Thinking back to it they have always seemed close. Sure he had Topper and Kelce but Jared was also the closest friend you’ve seen Rafe have. Which isn’t that weird because you have Liz. “I get what you mean. If it wasn’t for Liz I probably wouldn’t be here too.”

Rafe starts to chuckle. The bed shakes as he starts to laugh harder. “Kind of funny how similar we are. Our family fucking sucks.” He starts laughing again. When you think about it — yeah you two are similar. “It’s a good thing we got each other.” You look over to see his reaction but he catches you off guard with a kiss. “Definitely a good thing.”

For at least another hour the two of you talk about anything that comes to mind. You fell asleep first while talking about the time your grandmother took you to antique shopping for your birthday. Rafe layed there for a few more moments just watching you sleep. His left hand pushes a bit of hair that fell onto your face. Your nose twitches lightly when a strand of hair brushes against it. “Please don’t leave me.” He whispers to no one but himself — hoping that some deity would grant him at least that.

His eyes fight him to close and he slips off into sleep alongside you. The next morning he wakes up to you snuggled into his side and Wheezie behind you. He moves around a little which causes you to wake up. “She came in during the middle of the night. Told her she could stay.” He kisses the top of your head and mumbles an ‘okay’.

Birds are chirping in the tree outside the window. Normally they piss him off but today it’s not that bad. Closing his eyes, he tries to soak in this feeling of calmness. There’s loud knocking coming from down the hall. It’s probably a neighbor so Rafe just ignores it but the knocks keep coming. With a groan he gets up, telling you to stay here as he handles it.

He rubs his eyes as he walks down the hall and opens the front door. Sarah stands there with an angry expression. Behind her is John B with the rest of their friends. “What the hell are you doing?” He questions as Sarah bulldozes past him and the rest follow her. “Wheezie! Where are you?” John B gets up in his face, pushing him backwards and away from Sarah. 

“Come on Wheezie. You can leave your things, we’re going home.” Rafe stands up a bit taller now. “She’s not going anywhere near that house again.” John B pushes him again. This time punching him in the gut. “You can’t keep her locked up, man. Sneaking into the house to take her away was low.” Rafe is coughing, catching his breath from the punch.

He looks up at the sound of soft footsteps to see you with a look of horror on your face. “Rafe, are you okay?” Your eyes look around the room to see everyone. “Where’s Wheezie?” Sarah tries to get past you but you block her. “Sleeping and that's how it’s going to stay.” Sarah stares at you and narrows her eyes. It’s cute how she’s trying to act intimidating when she’s really not.

“You’re not her sister.” You audibly laugh which makes her look even more mad. “Well at least I’m not the one dragging her back to a house where someone hits her. If you really cared about her you wouldn’t bring her back.” She looks shocked by what you say. Based on how John B let’s go of Rafe, so is he. The other four stand there awkwardly not knowing what to do.

“That’s really low. Lying is going to save you from what the two of you did.” Wheezie pops up next to you, it seems that she was woken up due to all of the noise. “Isn’t he the same guy who choked you after attempting to kidnap you. It’s real when it happens to you but not when it’s me.” Sarah takes a step back at her younger sister's words. 

“News flash Sarah not everything is about you. We get it, you’re perfect and the rest of us live in your shadow. I’m not going back there.” Wheezie wipes tears from her cheeks as she keeps going. “Just go back to dad like we know you will. As long as he has his favorite kid he doesn’t need Rafe or I.” Sarah takes a step forward and reaches out to her.

On instinct you step in front of Wheezie and she hides behind you. Without saying a word you turn around and usher the young girl away from the mess in the front. You locked the both of you in her room and comforted her as she cried.

Rafe waits until you two are in the room before moving past John B. He stands in front of Sarah grabbing her shoulders to get her attention. “Listen, she didn’t mean most of what she said. She’s angry right now.” Sarah looks at her brother with tears in her eyes. “She hates me just like you.” She whispers it as her breathing gets harder. Tears start to roll off her cheeks and her lips quiver. 

“Hey it’s going to be okay.” John B places her hand on her back making her jump. She starts to hyperventilate as more tears flow freely. “Did you know jellyfish are older than sharks and dinosaurs?” Rafe speaks without thinking but it grabs Sarah’s attention. She looks at him with childlike eyes. “What does that have to do with any of this?” Kiara tries to argue but Rafe ignores her.

“They are over six hundred and fifty years old. Pretty cool if you think about it since everyone always thinks of the megalodon.” The group stares at Rafe like he has six heads. This is random behavior for him and they are all confused. But then there’s Sarah. His baby sister was staring at him with the same eyes she had as a child. The same ones that stared back at him with hatred. “We don’t hate you. I can’t hate you Sar.” A tear falls from her right cheek.

For a moment he thinks she’s just going to walk away but she hugs him. He doesn’t know what to do for a moment but his brain finally catches up. Wrapping his arms around her, he squeezes her tight to him. The rest of the group gives each other looks and starts to slowly back away. Sarah breaks the hug first, wiping the tears from her face. Rafe clears his throat and speaks. “I’m not letting her go back there.”

Sarah just nods her head in silent agreement. She heads over to the door grabbing John B’s hand for comfort. Just when she’s about to walk out the door she turns around to look at Rafe. “I don’t hate you either.” Rafe stands there alone feeling more than he’s felt in a long time. Heading over to Wheezie’s room he opened the door a crack to see you both talking.

The way you listen to her as you brush your hair makes his heart squeeze. Your eyes make contact and you smile at him and he returns it. He feels an urge to kiss you deeply in this exact moment. He can’t explain why but deep down he knows.

He’s fucked.

Taglist: @rafedaddy01@sideblogficrecslmao@haruvalentine4321@flvredcas@lovedrewstarkey@mayusaatma@ayatotiddies@rafesgiirl@pillowprincess4him@juliannaxx@xxbirkindoll2@theoraekenslover@heartsforrafecam@xxbirkindoll2@mayusaatma@rrafeswhore@10ava01@starkeysbebe@audzss@rafesbabygirlx @lolasangelz @emmaaas-posts @anacamofficial @theoraekenslover @drewsphswife @selfcontollover07@akobx Let me know if you want to be added

[writingroom21]

Girls On Film

pairing: pornstar!Rafe x pornstar!Reader

Summary: Running away from home to become a pornstar was never in your books. Having to move in with some asshole wan't in it either. Surely living in a house with someone you dislike can't be hard. It's just work, that's all it is. Right?

Warnings: 18+, smut, unprotected sex, cream pie, squirting, let me know if I missed any

Wc: 5.7K

Chapter 12: Gilmore Night

Series masterlist

“Are the two of you even listening right now?”

Liz is staring at the both of you. She was freaking out about the lighting in the room so you and Rafe had to distract yourselves.You look up from your phone to see her aggressively typing on her phone. “We need to hurry up and get this filmed. We’re behind schedule and still need to film at least two more.” She’s been stressed about the last few videos that need to be filmed.

It kind of stresses you out since that means this all ends soon. Being with Rafe has been the best time of your life. All of this has shown you a different side of yourself that you never knew you had. “We heard you. Just waiting for the go.” Rafe responds as he types away on his phone too. Looking over his shoulder you see that he’s texting Danny.

“Why are you texting him?” Their text thread consists mostly of them talking about football and setting up times to play videogames. “We became friends over a shared interest.” He looks over your body and sneaks a kiss before putting his phone away. Liz snaps at some of the crew that are lounging around causing them to scramble. Rafe’s hand finds your thigh, skimming his fingers along the skin.

He leans in closer to you to whisper in your ear. “Honestly, I don't know why I was so jealous.” He places a kiss right under your ear. Goosebumps spread across your skin as his hand gets higher. “Kinda like the thought of sharing you with him. Just so I can take you back home and show you that you're mine.” A moan comes from you catching everyone’s attention. They all stare at the two of you as Rafe starts to unbutton your pants.

“Don’t just fucking stand there. Film!”

The crew fumbles their way to start film and audio. When the camera finally turns on it catches Rafe sliding his fingers into you. His head is buried in your chest sucking on a nipple. Your left hand holds his head down while your right pinches your neglected nipple. Rafe’s fingers curve into your g-spot as his fingers pumped in and out. You moan, arching your back when he sucks your nipple a bit harder.

“More.” Rafe increases the pace of his fingers making sure to grind the palm of his hand on your clit. “Shit just like that.” He lets go of your nipple to suck a hickey on the top of your breast. It stings but you don’t stop him. You kind of like when he marks you up. Hell he even has photos of most of the hickies he’s given you on his phone. The thought of that alone brings you closer to the edge. 

He kisses his way up your chest and neck until he’s by your ear. “Turns out he’s a fan you know.” You moan, letting out a huh in confusion. “Danny, he’s seen our videos.” He places a kiss under your ear as you try not to freak out at the thought. Rafe curls his fingers into your g-spot harsher. There’s a sensation in your lower stomach that’s starting to form. “Bet he’d like to make a video with us.”​ The image of both of them taking you at the same time sends you over the edge. 

A gushing sound fills the room as you soak the bed sheets. Rafe removes his fingers to rub your clit more prolonging the pleasure you feel. He slaps your clit as he kneels on the bed so he can remove his clothes. You go to reach for him but he lays down in between your legs. Attaching his mouth to your clit he starts sucking as he returns his fingers right to your pussy. You swallow them up enjoying the way he pumps into you with ease. “I know you got more.” You moan as you look into his eyes.

There’s a glint in them. The one he usually gets when he’s up to no good. His tongue flicks over your clit furiously, almost making you tumble over the edge once more. But when he hears your moans and the way they get higher in pitch, he removes his mouth. His fingers keep pumping in and out as he kisses your hip. The same feeling starts to build again. You moan when he curls his finger into your g-spot as his thumb finds your clit. Rafe kisses your hip and slowly kisses his way up until he’s at your chest again.

He pulls a nipple into his mouth, latching on as he assaults your pussy. All you can hear is the squelching coming from your pussy. With another thrust you squirt everywhere again. Rafe slaps your clit hard making you squirt a bit harder. Heavy breathing fills the room as you try to catch your breath. Opening your eyes again you see Rafe with his eyes closed as he grips the base of his cock. Precum drips from the tip tainting the skin around your left hip. 

Leaning up slightly, your hand rests just above his dick. His eyes wrinkle before he opens them to look down at you. Without saying anything you replace his hand and start to pump him. Normally you don’t notice the crew but this time you do. The mic guy is almost in the shot from how close he’s standing. You can feel his eyes all over you but you push that thought down. Ignoring the stare you get back into the moment. 

“Just going to keep staring or are you going to finally do something.” 

A smirk grows on Rafe’s face. His hands shoot out to grab your hips to drag you closer before flipping you over. On your hands and knees, you look over your shoulder. “That’s it?” You’re taunting him now. There’s not really a reason for it but it just feels right. Since Liz has thrown away all scripts the both of you just go with the flow. His right hand lifts in the air before slamming down to swat you on the ass. A moan is ripped from your throat from the stinging sensation. 

Just as it stops he slaps you again and thrusts into you at the same time. Your pussy clenches at the intrusion, stretching to accommodate his size. Most times Rafe lets you get used to his size as even his fingers don’t do him justice. But this time he forgoes the nice gesture just to torture you. Yet you really can’t complain as you enjoy the pain you get from it. His thrusts are brutal causing his balls to slam into your clit with each thrust. 

His hand pushes your head down into the bed sheets as his right leg lifts up to give him a better angle. You try to move your head so your face isn’t covered but you can’t move. With his grip on you, he has you in a locked position. Hot burning needles stab your lungs as you fight with the last bit of air in your lungs. For a split second he lifts your head by your hair. Giving you a few moments to soothe your lungs before repeating the process. 

With minimal air your brain starts to feel fuzzy. That combined with his thrusts is enough to make your body go limp. He catches your body from falling. Holding you up, his biceps wrap around your throat forcing your back to his chest. His other hand holds your face, moving it from side to side for the camera. Your eyes are barely opened with your mouth open. There’s drool around your mouth but you can’t really care right now. 

The way that he feels is way too much right now. All you can feel was him. He’s inside you and surrounds you. He kisses your cheek, nipping at your jaw as his thrusts start to become uneven. His hand sneaks his way down to your clit to circle it once again.  “Come on baby, just one more.” You shake your head, knowing that you can’t. But to Rafe that was just a challenge. “Play with your tits.” He pinches your clit, emphasizing the point to make sure you do.

Following his instructions, you start to squeeze your breasts. Going a step further you tug and pinch your nipples. Your lower stomach starts to tingle and your walls clench around Rafe. He picks up his pace just a bit, sending you over the edge once again. Your walls constrict his movements making it harder for him to keep going. It only took him a few more minutes before he was convulsing behind you. 

His arm tightens a bit around your throat but it doesn’t restrict your airways. Both of your bodies slump forward as he fills you with cum. After a moment he gets up and pulls out letting the camera pick up the way his cum drips out of you. When it reaches your clit he scoops it back up just to shove it back in. You moan in protest telling him you are sensitive. Giving you a break, he pulls his fingers back out and slaps your ass. 

The camera’s cut and the crew starts to clean up. Liz starts to rush them to get the hell out. “I swear Jim if that video isn’t ready in two days I will kill you. Imagine how sad Jen’s going to be burying your body.” Jim’s eyes widen as he packs the camera away. “Jesus Liz.” She waves him off as she grabs her things. Liz grabs one of the robes and brings it over to you. “Here sweetie.” You take it and finish up using the rag that Rafe got you. Standing you put on the robe and follow her out of the room. 

“Don’t forget about our meeting in two days. We need to talk about the end of filming and how we move forward.” Rafe stops in his tracks causing you to bump into him. “I have a project lined up with you already with Rocky. Think it’s going to be a good one.” She continues to talk but you are focused on Rafe. His jaw is locked tight, the muscles constricting. 

“Rocky really?”

Liz turns around with the largest smile you’ve ever seen. “What’s wrong Rafe? Rocky is a great guy and very popular.” Her eyes flicker to your frame that is slightly hiding behind Rafe’s. “He’s like this nordic god. Trust me you’ll have fun.” She gives you a wink and then looks at Rafe. “Don’t worry I’m sure Jared has things lined up for you.” With that she walked away leaving you both in the hallway.

You know who Rocky is. When you first got the job you went on a deep dive looking through all of the workers' videos. If you are being honest, yeah Rocky looks good but he seems generic. Like the only thing he really has going for him is his looks and maybe being good in bed. “Let’s go take a shower.” You place your hand on his shoulder trying to snap him out of whatever trance he’s in. His normally blue eyes are more clouded. 

He follows you on autopilot but is still as affectionate as he’s always been. The two of you haven’t talked about what happens after filming and it hangs over you like a dark cloud. With every new shoot you just get one step closer to the end. “How about we have a take out night?” It looks like your suggestion snapped him out of his head. He lathers your body with soap and moves you directly under the stream of water. A small smile finds his face when you lean your head back on his chest as the water warms your body. “Like in Gilmore Girls?” You snort at the comment and turn to look at him. 

His arms instinctively wrap around you. The water pours over the both of you. “Wheezie made me watch it with her.” You smile and stand on the tip of your toes to give him a kiss. “That actually sounds really nice.” The two of you finish up the shower and get dressed. Rafe starts to order a bunch of food as you set up the living room for a movie night. You have your playlist playing as you move some of the cushions. “Food has been ordered and Wheezie is on her way back home.”

He looks around the living room seeing how you set everything up. There are pillows and blankets on the floor making it like a big bed. “Like what you did with the place.” A Metallica song starts to play as you give a twirl with your arms out. “Why thank you. I try my best sometimes.” His face cringes as the instrumentals play. The soft instruments are a stark contrast to the band's normal music. “You listen to Metallica?” He’s looking at your phone seeing what song and band was playing. You nod as you walk over and snatch it from his hands to put the music up. “Yup, especially because this is one of the best love songs to be created.”

Rafe stares at you like you’re crazy. “Oh yeah the metal band knows about love.” Shaking your head you pull him to the middle of the living room. You start to sway just before the lyrics start playing and you sing along. “So close no matter how far. Couldn’t be more from the heart.” He looks suspicious as you keep singing. Never opened myself this way. Life is ours, we live it our way. The lyrics start to sink in as he keeps listening. “Come on, at least give it a chance.” You coax him as you go back to singing. “Trust I seek and I find in you. Everyday for us something new. Open mind for a different view and nothing else matters.” You close your eyes as you rock from side to side while holding his hands. 

Rafe swings slightly just watching as a smile forms on your face. You are singing lightly but it’s all he can hear. He takes one of his hands back to pull you close to him. Your eyes open to look up at him. Trust I seek and I find in you. “Think I get it.” You smile at his words. “Knew you would.” He places his forehead on yours while the two of you sway to the song. Rafe’s left hand creeps its way up and cups your face causing your eyes to open. He’s looking at you deeply, his eyes snap to your lips and back to your eyes. “I.” He doesn’t say anything else just kisses you. Maybe he didn’t need to say anything because you know what he was going to say. And you feel the same.  Both of your are lost in the moment that you didn’t hear Wheezie come in or the song change.

“What are you two doing?”

You both pull away to look at Wheezie who is staring in confusion. “Who the hell slow dances to heavy metal?” You giggle as you pause the slipknot song that started to play. “Just listen to the best love songs.” Rafe sends you a wink like it became an inside joke for the both of you. Wheezie gives you a weird look but shrugs it off. When it comes to the both of you she’s learned to embrace the weirdness. In a way it’s kind of cute seeing the two of you tip toe around whatever is going on. But her stance of you are good for him still stands. He’s never been this open around someone, not even his family. With you it’s like he has nothing to hide. Wheezie makes her way over to the couch before plopping herself down. “The two of you are weird, you know that right.” You laugh as you jump down right next to her.

Picking up the remote you hand it to her and pull her in a side hug. “But you love us.” You sing to her while she scrolls through movies to watch. The doorbell rings with what you assume is the first order of food. Rafe goes to get the food and a second delivery guy shows up. “Oh shit hold on let me go get your money.” He runs to his room meaning you have to grab the bags from both of the delivery guys. Rafe shows up right as you get the last bag. 

“Here keep the change.” He takes some of the bags to help you spread the food out. “We got Indian and Chinese right here. I got Mexican on the way also.” Wheezie’s eyes light up at the mention of all of the food. “Wait, are we having a Gilmore Girl’s night?” The joy in her voice was worth it. She builds herself a plate and you do the same. The ‘Time Traveler's Wife’ plays while you all eat your food. Wheezie sits on the couch and you are on the floor next to Rafe. The pillow and blanket strategy you made is actually really comfortable.

 You finish off the last piece of garlic naan by cleaning up the leftover sauce on your plate. At that exact moment the doorbell rings with the rest of the food. Rafe groans as he gets up to pay for it and Wheezie lets out a big sigh. “How the hell do they do this like every week.” Rafe places the last bag in front of all of you. Collectively you all stare at it with full stomachs. “So who’s going to open it.” From behind you Wheezie groans loudly. Rafe throws himself practically next to you. The next movie plays while you all try to ignore the amount of food surrounding you. “Maybe you should ask Bells if she wants to come over for some food.” Jumping at the chance to see her friend, Wheezie pulls out her phone to text her. “You should see if her brother wants to come too.”

The siblings stop in their tracks to look at you. She looks like she’s about to scream and Rafe is glaring. “Bella has a brother?” Wheezie is shaking her head but stops when he looks at her. “So she has a brother that I only just found out about.” You mouth a sorry as she tries to explain. Both of them go back and forth to the point Bella showed up. As if the universe wants to dig the hole deeper, she brought her brother. The kid is not even a year or two older than her but towers over her from where he stands. “Hi I’m Antoine.”

 You smile and shake his extended hand. “Did your mom like Bridgerton when she had both of you.” Bella laughs and confirms the idea. You show them the set up in the living room and chuckle seeing the two siblings try to cover up their argument. “Our little brother is named Clayton for that exact reason. She loved all of the books.” Bella makes herself a plate and sits next to Wheezie while Antoine just stands there. 

He looks between you and Rafe before his eyes widen and his cheeks heat up. His head dips down while he gets his food and sits on the other side of Wheezie. Rafe goes to say something but with a glare from you he shuts up. Ben’s eyes keep flickering up to you as you try to convince Rafe to give them space. Your eyes squint at him and you put the pieces together. Leaning closer to Rafe you pull at his arm. “We need to leave right now.” A bewildered look crosses his face. “I’m not leaving her here with him.” 

You abruptly get up from your seat and pull him up with you. The three teens give you a weird look. “You all have fun. I think the food has caught up to us and we are so tired.” You sell the performance with a yawn and nudge the six foot giant next to you so he’ll do the same. With minimal effort he barely opens his mouth and mimics a yawn. You practically drag him to the room and slam the door close before locking it. 

“I don’t want to leave her out there with him. Do you know how horny teenage boys are?” You lock the door and lean against it. “That’s exactly the problem. He’s a horny teen that knows what we do.” His face pales at the thought. The movie can still be heard from down the hall. It’s the perfect background noise for his pacing. “Maybe he doesn’t know and he’s just shy.” He sits on the edge of the bed with his head hanging down. You walk over to him and sit down next to him. “I can’t fuck up her life.”

 You look at him but he won’t even met your eyes. The air feels thick. Sitting there, you don’t know what to say as he tries to calm his breathing. Wrapping your arms around him you hug him. “You aren’t fucking up her life.” The teens' laughter echoes down the hall filling the room with some sense of joy. 

Even though Rafe has become open with certain things, his family life is still a sore topic. You know that Ward is a bad person and the things he’s done to not only Rafe but all of them. How Rose came into the picture not too long after his mother left. Making him feel  hatred for her. He may have been young but he knew then she was the other woman. Just the way she would criticize him for missing her and just wanting his old family back. Or how Ward would slap him around for not being normal like Sarah and dragging Wheezie down with him. But the one thing he’s never said is the reason why he left. Or why he feels like such a screw up that he’s afraid to have his own sister around. You know that he’s happy that she’s here. But you can see that deep down he’s scared of something.

“She deserves better than me.” 

You look at him to see tears in his waterline. “You deserve better.”  The words stun you. His forehead rests on yours. A stray tear slithers down his check that you catch. “You aren’t poison Rafe. You aren’t going to ruin our lives.” He shakes his head trying to pull himself away but you drag him back down. “Listen to me, okay.” His watery eyes meet your gaze. “Wheezie loves you. That’s why  when things got bad she came to you. She feels safe with you.” You grab his face so he doesn’t look away from you. 

“I feel safe with you. If you were going to ruin our lives it would have happened already. To me you’re a good person, none of your mistakes will change that.” A loud bang comes from the living room with some screams. “I think they’re watching a scary movie.” He’s trying to lighten the mood. It’s the same defense tactic he uses when he’s uncomfortable. Another scream fills the room and he looks away.

“I think you’re the only person who sees me.”

You kiss his cheek. “You only see me too.” It’s true. Even when he pisses you off and all you want to do is scream it doesn’t matter. Because at the end of the day with him you finally feel normal. The rest of the night felt weird. Rafe held you all night talking about some tv show Wheezie is making him watch. By twelve you heard Bella and her brother leave. 

“I’m going to go talk to her.” He gets up and you get out of bed to block the door. “Why?” He gives you a weird look. “I’m getting ahead of it. Only a matter of time before he tells her.” Footsteps come down the hall and you press your ear to the door. They briefly stop in front of the door but keep going until she gets in her room. Rafe sneaks up behind you and tries to open the door.

WIthout thinking you pinch his nipple and twist. He shrieks and jumps back as he slaps your hand away. “What the fuck star.” You shush him and push him more into the room. “Listen, if I tell you this you have to promise not to say anything.” He stands there looking at you like you're dumb. You snap your fingers in his face. “Drop the look and promise.” He fixes his face and shrugs. “Sure.” Silence fills the room. He’s waiting for you to say something but you don’t.

Holding up your [inky finger you wingle it. With a sigh he wraps his pinky around yours. “She likes him and if she finds out it will hurt her. She’ll back off without giving herself a chance. He looked so ashamed that I really don’t think it’s a problem.” He holds your hand, giving it a squeeze. He lets out a breath of air and brings you both to the bed. You get under the covers and snuggle into his side enjoying the way you can hear his heartbeat.

“If he hurts her can I at least scare him a bit.” Looking up you can see under his chin. “You can’t hurt him, he’s a kid.” His chest grumbles a little. You lay your head back on his chest, closing your eyes so you can sleep. 

The next morning Wheezie seemed like she was floating on cloud 9. Rafe was busy fixing breakfast while the two of you watched Cartoons. “What’s got you all smiley?” You poke her cheek and she grins even more. “Bells left before you know who did. We just stayed up watching movies.” She sounds so excited. There’s a sparkle in her eyes. “Just be careful. You can always tell me the truth.” There’s a clunking noise coming from the kitchen from Rafe banging something around.

“I know I just get worried about Rafe.” She throws her head in his direction. Brushing off the comment, you laugh. “Trust me I got him covered.” For a moment she looks at you. The couch dips when she leans over to give you a hug. “Thank you.” Shortly after Rafe was done so you both went to eat. 

This morning you and Rafe have a meeting so after breakfast you start to get ready. He’s dragging his feet like he always does. “Can you hurry up? I’m not getting yelled at for you.” He scoffs as he gets into the car and starts it up. “As if Liz would ever yell at you.” A smile forms on your lips because you know he’s right. Over the months you and Liz have developed a great relationship.

Honestly sometimes it feels like she’s more of a mom than your manager. Which is a weird thought considering what you do for work. During the ride all you can think about is that this is really it. In a few moments you’ll be talking about the end of you and Rafe. Liz already said you’ll both work together in some videos. But they want you to branch out with the other workers. 

It makes sense. You can’t solely rely on working with just one person. Sure everyone loved you and Rafe together but maybe they’ll like something more. You keep repeating those words Liz said to help feel less nervous. “Hope Rocky finally learned how to properly thrust.” Your eyes bunch up at Rafe’s words. Baffled by the statement you give him a weird look. “Excuse me?”

He just smirks as he parks the car. “Some of the girls said he’s all show and no gain.” He shrugs and gets out of the car making you follow him. “For your sake I hope he finally learned how to make a girl cum.” Oh he’s trying to play dirty. The smirk he has on his face just confirms that he’s just trying to be a jerk right now. Rolling your eyes you walk ahead of him to catch the elevator.

“For the girls sake I hope you can forget about me. Wouldn’t want them to say the same thing about you.” The elevator dings as the door opens so you can go up. Rafe follows you in and leans against the wall across from you. The soft music plays as you stare at each other. “I’m just playing. Doesn’t matter anyway because I’m telling Jared I film with you.” You laugh and look anywhere but him. 

“Ha ha very funny Rafe. I’m sure we’ll work together sometimes.” he walks over to you and grabs your hand. His unoccupied hand grabs your chin to force you to look at him. “I’m serious. We have to film together from here on out. I can share you when needed but I mean it when I say you’re mine.” A lump forms in your throat. What is he doing to you? “And I’m yours so there’s not really a need to film with others.” He goes on trying to justify himself but he doesn’t need to. You shut him up with a kiss. His arms wrap around your waist as you wrap yours around his neck. Pulling back from the kiss you look him in the eyes. “Sounds like a good plan to me.”

The elevator dings again just as the doors open. “Oh my god, Rafe.” A high pitched voice says. When you look to the right you see Beth standing there. Rafe seems to tense, his grip on your body getting a bit tighter. “Beth.” One of her eyes twitches at his deadpan tone. She’s standing in between the doors so they don’t close. She looks at you and points behind her to Liz’s office. “You must be running late for your meeting. Liz is waiting for you.”

Rafe stands tall and starts to usher you out. Just as you exit, Beth blocks you from him and tries to press the lobby floor. He stops her and moves around her to get out. “Actually we both have a meeting.” She gives him a look. “But Jared is your manager.” You look around trying to get away from this interaction. A hand grabs your waist and you realize that Rafe pulled you to his side. “He’ll be there. It’s about our series anyway.”

Her eye twitches again but she tries to play it cool. Nodding her head she takes a step back. “That’s okay. I have to pick up my son anyway so I have to go.” The doors close right when she’s done with her sentence. A hum from the ceiling lights fills the hallway. He slowly turns to you in a frantic way. “She has a baby?” You nod your head in confirmation.

“Come on she’s already pissed we’re late.” Jared shouts from down the hall to the both of you. You drag Rafe along with you and enter the office. Liz fixes some papers and starts going over the next two shoots. Jared adds in here and there but mostly it’s just nonsense. “We want you both to keep posting online.” Rafe’s head picks up. “Like when we film.”

Liz sighs like she’s explaining something to a toddler. “No dumbass. When you two film yourselves just post it. Doesn’t have to be often but if you film it, post it.” Rafe grins as he looks at you. “I know what we are doing after.” You blush at the thought and Jared high five’s Rafe. Jesus he’s a prick. “Alright sweetie you and Rocky should probably meet for coffee soon. Maybe also a tester.”

Rafe leans forward. “Actually we wanted to talk to the both of you about something.” She doesn’t look amused but she gestures for him to keep going. “We want to exclusively work together. The others can join but we come in a package now.” Jared looks at Liz with wide eyes. Clearly he had no idea that his star guy could even make such a request. On the other hand Liz doesn’t look impressed.

“No.”

Taking a deep breath you go to defend the decision but she keeps going. “You really think you’re that amazing to destroy two of my stars' careers.” Rafe sits there taking everything Liz throws at him. “Let me tell you this. I won’t let you hurt her.” Everyone is quietly staring at her while she leans back in her chair. Jared clears his throat. “I think they are right. Everyone loves them together and adding a third or maybe fourth would make people go crazy.” She rolls her eyes not wanting to hear it.

“This is what I want Liz and I’m not backing down.” The two of you look at each other. Her eyes tell you something but you can’t decipher it. “Liz, we would probably be losing money if we don’t take this deal.” The tapping of her foot gets fast as she thinks about her options. She throws down her pen. “Fine, you have a deal.” Rafe’s hand reaches out to yours. With the new changes, Liz really didn’t have much to say. She said that she will figure out concepts and look at who is interested in joining for some videos.

Jared pulls Rafe out the door when the meeting is over leaving you with Liz. She looks disappointed but doesn’t want to say anything. “I know you care and I really appreciate it.” A soft smile graces her face. “But you keep judging him on his past mistakes when he’s shown that he’s different. I really think he’s changed.” When you walk out both men are arguing. Beth’s name is mentioned, making you freeze. Rafe shoves Jared a bit and storms off to stand near the elevators.

Making your way over, you nod to Jared as you pass by. Rafe has his back turned to you so you press the down button before tapping his shoulder. When he turns around you can see the panic expression over his face but he hides it. “Everything okay?” He just nods and gets in the elevator when it gets there. “He’s just upset because I sprung that on them.” Even though you don’t truly believe it, you agree.

Everything is going to be okay. Right?

Taglist: @rafedaddy01@sideblogficrecslmao@haruvalentine4321@flvredcas@lovedrewstarkey@mayusaatma@ayatotiddies@rafesgiirl@pillowprincess4him@juliannaxx@xxbirkindoll2@theoraekenslover@heartsforrafecam@xxbirkindoll2@mayusaatma@rrafeswhore@10ava01@starkeysbebe@audzss@rafesbabygirlx @lolasangelz @emmaaas-posts @anacamofficial @theoraekenslover @drewsphswife @selfcontollover07@akobx @solaceluna @angelteardropss @illicitpages let me know if you want to be added

[writingroom21]

New part of Girls on Film in two hours!

[writingroom21]

girls on filmmm?😭🙏🏼

Heyyyy! I’m finishing up right now. I’ve been on vacation so it’s been hard to write. Especially without wifi but it should be up by the end of the week!

[writingroom21]

Finally got a chance to read this on my vacation and ouch. My poor baby just wanted to be with rafe 😔

SHERIFF’S DAUGHTER

✧ 𝚁𝚊𝚏𝚎 𝚡 𝚂𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚙𝚎𝚜𝚍𝚊𝚞𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚎𝚛!𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛

✧ 𝚂𝚞𝚖𝚖𝚊𝚛𝚢: 𝚈𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚕𝚒𝚏𝚎 𝚑𝚊𝚍 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝚊 𝚖𝚎𝚜𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚜𝚎 𝚙𝚊𝚜𝚝 𝚏𝚎𝚠 𝚖𝚘𝚗𝚝𝚑𝚜. 𝚃𝚑𝚎 𝚏𝚊𝚞𝚕𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚗𝚘 𝚘𝚗𝚎𝚜 𝚎𝚡𝚌𝚎𝚙𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚋𝚘𝚢𝚏𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚗𝚍. 𝙳𝚎𝚜𝚙𝚒𝚝𝚎 𝚊𝚕𝚕, 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚢𝚎𝚍 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚑𝚒𝚖. 𝙸𝚝 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚊 𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚋𝚒𝚍𝚍𝚎𝚗 𝚒𝚗 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚜𝚎𝚑𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚝𝚘 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚗 𝚋𝚎 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚑𝚒𝚖 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚍𝚒𝚍𝚗'𝚝 𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚙 𝚢𝚘𝚞. 𝚄𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚕 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚜𝚎𝚌𝚛𝚎𝚝 𝚊𝚏𝚏𝚊𝚒𝚛 𝚒𝚜 𝚋𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚝𝚊𝚋𝚕𝚎, 𝚚𝚞𝚒𝚝𝚎 𝚕𝚒𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢, 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚋𝚘𝚢𝚏𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚗𝚍 𝚒𝚜 𝚊𝚛𝚛𝚎𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚖𝚞𝚛𝚍𝚎𝚛 𝚑𝚎 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚖𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚎𝚍.

✧ 𝚆𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜: 𝙼𝙳𝙽𝙸 - 𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚍𝚎𝚊𝚝𝚑, 𝚜𝚖𝚞𝚝 (𝚌𝚊𝚛 𝚜𝚎𝚡, 𝚛𝚒𝚍𝚒𝚗𝚐)

✧ 𝚊𝚗: 𝚜𝚞𝚛𝚙𝚛𝚒𝚜𝚎 𝙸'𝚖 𝚋𝚊𝚌𝚔, 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚊 𝚕𝚘𝚗𝚐 𝚘𝚗𝚎 <3

✧ 3.3𝚔 𝚠𝚘𝚛𝚍𝚜

✧ 𝙼𝙰𝚂𝚃𝙴𝚁𝙻𝙸𝚂𝚃 | 𝚃𝙰𝙶𝙻𝙸𝚂𝚃

You sat at the table with your father. His first meal home in 6 nights, the same night when you just so happened to be home too. You honestly thought you’d be alone. You know he’s angry at you. He didn’t look at you once since he’s entered the house. In his defense, you haven't been around for months. You’re 18 after all you could do as you please. You had a life, others that depended on you, he couldn’t fault you for that.

But could he blame you? You had your boyfriend and your friends. Then, everything turned to shit. Complete and utter shit. Your friends needed you now more than ever. And unbeknownst to your father, yet, despite all of the mess he caused you couldn’t keep away from the man you loved. You could feel the resentment seeping out of his pores, that you chose them over him.

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·

Six months ago was your first real encounter with Rafe. You were tucked away sitting by the shore, clearing your head of the bonfire that was going on. Your friends had dragged you out but you didn’t want to be there. You gave in but once they were distracted, you took the chance to get away. Rafe had done the same. Wanting to get away of being the center of attention, away from all the expectations that come with being a Cameron. You spent the entire night together, just the two of you. To your surprise, he opened up a lot, you as well. You went home with him, waking up the next morning, naked and wrapped around him. After that you spent almost every night at his.

Five months ago you began dating officially. The only people who knew were his friends and yours. You had told him the reservations your father had about her being involved with him and his family, but you ensured him that didn’t matter to you. Your friends were reluctant but trusted your judgment, meanwhile his friends too every opportunity to make fun of Rafe for wanting someone who slums it with the pogues like you do. But nothing stopped either of you from carrying on in the relationship. You continued splitting your time between him and your friends. Coming home every once in a while to reset and leave again.

Four months ago you and Rafe were having the times of your lives sneaking around. It was a thrill that never seemed to get old. He had bought you a matching blue dress for the night of Midsummers and despite you not being able to go with him. He had worn the same tux and took you out to the mainland the night after. He was a dream when you were together. What did get old was trying to pull him out of his old ways. The ways that constantly got him into fights with your friends. They'd keep the interactions from you, and of course, he'd never bother to tell you. The day on the golf course with Pope, and the night of Midsummers. You didn't speak to him for a week after fight at the summer night movie. He still couldn't take the hint. But you loved him nonetheless.

Three months ago Rafe began to feel the weight of his father’s relentless demands of him being a better son and prodigy of the Cameron legacy. The drugs sucked him in and his father kicked him out. He spent a few nights sneaking into your bedroom before finding a place to crash. One morning, when you had stayed over, you woke up to an empty house. You spent the entire day waiting for him to return but he never did. You were snapped out of any thought running rampant in your mind, when a dozen frantic texts came through from Kie and JJ. You rushed out of the pristine Figure 8 mansion to find your friends bunkered in Kie's car at an abandoned shack. Desperate for answers, you don't stop until they tell you John B was wrongfully accused of killing Peterkin. In that moment you felt key details were left out but no one seemed to want to give them to you.

Two months ago it had been a whole month since you've pieced everything together. You had learned that Rafe was the one who pulled the trigger. When he and Barry cornered you and your friends while trying to retrieve John B and Sarah's getaway. It was a day that everything you knew about him was shattered. He was a murderer, for the sake of his father, the one he told you over and over that he hated. The same day you cried out for Pope to stop choking him out because despite everything you still loved him. The same day, John B and Sarah were sent out into the storm and presumed dead. The same day that in a time of need, you had wished it was Rafe's arms around you and not your father's as you sobbed over your friends.

One month ago you and the Pogues discovered John B and Sarah were alive. This was all you needed to jump into action and clear your friend's name. Spying on Ward, jumping into sewers, getting flushed out of sewers, bringing the murder weapon to your father, who seemed more interested in the fact that Kie smelled than the fact that you were brining him cold hard evidence. No matter how hard you tried, it always seemed to fail. All the while, you were still sneaking around with Rafe. You couldn't stop the temptations of wanting to be with. Other than the week of initail shock that two of your best friends were gone. You were back in his bed, naked and tangled up in the sweat covered sheets, just like your first night together.

Two weeks ago John B and Sarah had made it back to OBX. You confided to Sarah and only Sarah that you couldn't keep away from Rafe. She was understanding, she understood love and the way that if something was real it couldn't be stopped. Her telling you that Rafe knew she was alive and shot her in the Bahamas, made you sick. Literally, you couldn't stop the bile from coming up if you wanted to. She promised you that your secret was safe and things seemed ok for now. Boy was she wrong. John B was caught and a death sentence was on the table. You pleaded with your father to see the truth but it seemed that it only fell on deaf ears. He seemed confident this was justice for his friend and colleague.

One week after that was when your world was spun upside down yet again.

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·

The only sounds that echoed through the kitchen was the silverware clanking against the dishes. You were honestly afraid that any little movement you made would set him off. You ate as fast as you could before getting up and placing your things in the dishwasher.

You kept your head down as you made your way towards the living room before your father’s voice breaks through the silence. “Leaving so soon?”

“I was gonna head out. It doesn’t seem like you want me here.”

“Sit down." Shoupe's voice was low but demanding. It was an octave that he used throughout your whole life and one that you knew something bad was coming.

You do as your told. Taking back the seat across the table from your father. His eyes never leave yours. His demeanor is tough and shut off. Almost as if he was sitting on the opposite side of an interrogation table and you were a suspect.

"I know I didn't take you and your friends seriously at first and I know these past two months have been hard on you and I'm sorry about that. I'm sorry that I wasn't there for you more. I'm sorry that I let work get in the way. I'm sorry you didn't think I believed in you."

You look down at the table, feeling the weight of his words. It has been hard. You felt as if your own father was against you the entire time. Just because of who was suspected. No one cares about a Pogues life on this island. You were convinced that no matter what was given to him that it wouldn't matter. Even if that meant turning in your Rafe.

His eyes soften just a bit as he continues, "and although I do not like who you surround yourself with, please know that I am very sorry to them as well. None of you, especially John B deserved it."

In the blink of an eye, his face hardened again once he began to speak about the next part. You still haven't said a word. You know where this is going and even though it's what you wanted for the sake of your friends. It doesn't hurt any less.

"It may not have seemed like it at the time, but I took what you said seriously. That's how the SBI found the Cameron's fingerprints on the gun. You and your friends were how we took them down. You should be proud, I'm proud to see your dedication to your friend."

You let go of a breath you've been holding in. Your dad was proud. You haven't felt that feeling from him in a long time. This wasn't the way you expected for this conversation to go. "Thank you, dad. Seriously. I know I give you a hard time for wanting to be with them all the time. But I love them and I don't regret anything I did."

"I'm glad you didn't because we got the right person. The Cameron's are snakes. Ward is a conniving son of bitch who's buys his way out of everything, but he couldn't this time. We got Rafe this morning and the only way he was able to get him out was to blow himself up. A man with such arrogance, turned out to be such a pussy. His son is a drug addicted brat and he's a poor excuse for a man."

You were locked in place. Frozen by your father's words. You wanted to agree but the words were stuck.

"But you already knew everything that happened this morning, right sweetheart?"

Before you could say anything, your father reached into his pocket and slid over something to you. It was like everything was happening in slow motion. You watched as it made its way over to you, stopping right at the edge of the table. It was your hair clip. The one your mother gave to you before she passed, the one she wore every day, the one you now wore every day in memory of her.

You felt as if the walls were closing in. You hear your father chuckle to himself. But the ringing in your ears made it seem like he was miles away. You felt hot, suffocatingly hot. The skin around your nails began to bleed from how deep you were picking at them. You felt sick, and you swore you were about to pass out. Your trembling hands reached out and picked up the floral hair clip.

"You want to tell me why we found that in Rafe Cameron's car this morning when we searched it?" Your father shouted as he slammed his hand on the table. It made you flinch and you closed your eyes. "I'd really like to understand why my daughter's, who was told to stay the fuck away from that kid, hairclip that she never goes anywhere without, was in his vehicle!"

The memory of today flashed through your mind in an instant.

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·

You had woken up at the Chateau, on top of Kie crammed on the couch, to a slamming of the front door. John B stood there a free man. Everyone surrounded him questioning him about his release.

"They just let me go, but you should know, they're going after Rafe."

Everyone looked over to Sarah, but Sarah looked at you. Your stomach turned. On one hand you were happy John B's name was cleared, but this meant you may never see Rafe again. Just in the nick of time, your phone buzzed on the cluttered coffee table.

Rafe: Baby, please come see me. I don't have a lot of time.

You gave Sarah a knowing look and she nodded, giving you an ok to through on your sneakers and rush out the door with out any answers.

You made your way to Rafe's location. Barry's house, of course. You entered without knocking to see Rafe with his head in his hands. You rushed over to him immediately and pulled him in for a hug. Barry, being who he is, couldn't help but mock the sight. Rafe gave him a look before pulling you, outside and into the back seat of his truck.

“My dad was just here. I’m leaving, but I needed to see my girl one last time.”

“Where are you going?” Your voice broke slightly. He was no good but he was your Rafe. You didn’t want him to leave you.

“Wilmington for now. Then I don’t know. I needed you now though.”

You knew what he was asking of you and held back tears as he pulled you in for a kiss. Much to his luck you showed up in a mini skirt. It was already bunched up at your waist. You were pulled into his lap as he kissed down your neck. Your hands roamed tugging at his shirt and pulling it off. His belt and pants were next. He was rock hard for you. It didn’t take much.

He held your panties to the side as you sunk down onto him. He every inch of him stretched you out. You halted once you met his thighs. You leaned in and pressed your lips to his as you slowly rolled your rolled your hips. Rafe met your movements, jutting his up into you.

The passion of the moment sent him into overdrive. He had wrapped his arms around your waist, locking you in place as he firmly planted his feet on the floor of the truck. He lifted you slightly giving him enough room to hammer into you. Moans, heavy pants and the wet sound of your soaked cunt filled the cabin. Most likely Barry’s living room too, because there was no way he couldn’t hear the sounds that came out of you.

Rafe’s moves never faltered. You cried out in his ear and it was pure pleasure for him, “fff-fuck, gonna miss you baby.”

“Don’t stop, I don’t want it to end.” You let out a powerful moan and tucked your face into the crook of his neck. How long was it going to be until you could hold him again?

You came unexpectedly. Gripping tightly onto Rafe’s hair as your legs shook from the orgasm. This didn’t stop Rafe though, he continued his brutal pace. Taking one of arms from around you, his thumb found its way to your swollen clit, rubbing in time with his thrusts. Just like he did, you matched his thrusts in a perfect rhythm. Each drop, each swirl of his thumb sent you into a frenzy.

You braced yourself, one arm on the ceiling, one in the drivers side headrest. Rafe’s other hand snaked up your shirt and played with your nipple, back and forth between each breast.

“Gimme one more baby, you said you didn’t want it to end.”

His command was all it took. You soaked his entire lap, Rafe meeting his peak right after. He had never been so vocal before but every twitch of his cock was matched with a throaty moan. Once he came down, he pulled you back into him and he rested his head on your chest. He didn’t want to let go but he knew he had no time left.

You swore you’d never seen Rafe Cameron again when Barry whisked him away on that shitty little boat. You held back tears as you watched him go, it was only until you were certain he was out of sight that that you fell to the ground sobbing.

You had composed yourself on the way back to the Chateau, only to be dragged back out to the Twinkie as they were going to see Ward get arrested. You were met with your dad at the dock trying to get him back in. The eruption, the flames, the debris, you could only picture the shambles that Rafe’s life had become. He was consumed by his father, wanting to be the perfect son, even though he knew he’d never be in the eyes of Ward.

You told your friends that you were just going to head home after what just happened. No one questioned you. After your friends dispersed, you snuck back into Tannyhill and sat on the edge of Rafe’s bed for a few hours before hearing the turn of the doorknob. He was back, he was safe, and his cruel, piece of shit father was gone. You held him for hours before actually heading home, leaving him to deal with family matters.

· · ─ ·✶· ─ · ·

“Hello?! I asked you a god damn question!” Your father’s voice rang out bringing you back into the moment. Back to the present after all that has happened today.

Reliving all that happened today, you realized now how the hair clip had gotten lost. The heat of the moment in the car, the emotional turmoil the rest of the day entailed was almost too much to bear. It must've slipped out when you and Rafe were together in there. You didn’t even know, it wasn’t with you anymore. This could not be more humiliating.

“I saw Rafe before he was arrested.”

Your father raised an eyebrow. “And why would you do that?”

“Because,” your throat suddenly got dry, but you forced the words out regardless, “because he’s my boyfriend and he has been for months.”

You didn’t know if your father wanted to cry or slam his chair into the ground repeatedly. He didn’t say a single word. He didn’t need to. You knew what was going on inside his mind. If he wasn’t angry before, he certainly is now.

“He was gonna skip town, which I know you already know, and he wanted to see me before he left. I wanted to see him. I couldn’t not see him. I love him.”

Your head dipped at those last three words you said to him. Not out of embarrassment, but because of how immorally wrong you felt, telling your father how much you loved the murderer of his friend. It was worse now, because his dad took the fall for what he did and you both knew that. There is no real justice for Susan.

“I know you hate that family, but you don’t understand. Rafe did bad things but he is not a bad person. Ward is the scum of the empire he created. Rafe now has a second chance to prove himself without him here. And I won’t leave him.”

Still your father hadn’t said a single word. He was seething.

“I’m sorry I’m such a disappointment. I’m sorry I’m torn in the middle of Pogues and Kooks. I’m sorry you think my friends are worthless and I’m sorry my boyfriend is who he is. But I can’t help who becomes apart of my family.”

Finally after all this time. After all your rambling. After every betraying word that came out of your mouth. Your father could only muster up one.

“Leave.”

Dividers by @cafekitsune thank you @rafesteddy for showing me where to find them. 🫶🏼

Tags + some moots <3 @rafestoothbrush @weluvwbb @itsforeverandalwayz @butterfly-ibuki @megiiite @siredbtches @bigenergy777 @aupernatural-teenwolflover @rafegf-real @skywalker0809 @snowtargaryen @kieeslove @leather-n-velvet @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @diasnohibng @slurpdew @alphabetically-deranged @runawayrafetrain @currentresidentinhell @slut-4-rafey @akobx @laniirackssss @jjmaybankmylovee @slut4you @larema121 @sc05 @k4yr14 @chromeheartsbaby @jennieonline @maybejj @inthelibrarybtw @cherrywriterrr @memoirofasparklemuff1n @idk-tbh127 @moondustbaby @writingroom21 @maybankslover @papercranesandinkstains @rcwhore @nemesyaaa

[writingroom21]

Hehehe just prepare yourself🤭

Sweet Escape

Pairing: Rafe x single mom reader

Summary: Moving to Kildare with your best friend and daughter was the perfect move. The little island is perfect, the people are nice, and you are finally at peace. Then Rafe comes in with his perfect smile and charm, sweeping you off your feet. The only issue is if you are ready to let someone else in.

Warnings: none

Wc: 4.8K

“I left an extra register of cash in the safe in the back. The next shipment comes in today but they are going to put everything back there so you don’t need to worry about it.” Sarah nods her head and looks anywhere but you after you finish. “Sounds good. Good luck today.” It’s been awkward working with both of the girls after the break up. They both didn’t really understand at first.

Rafe told them you two just drifted apart. He didn’t want them to be mad at you but they knew something wasn’t right. You tp;d them the truth and Sarah came around to the whole fact. Wheezie understands but she’s still really upset about it. But at least they aren’t giving you the cold shoulder. 

“Thanks.” You give her a tight lipped smile as you walk out of the shop and to your car. Starting the car, you take in a few deep breaths. “Everything is going to be okay.” You whisper to yourself as you start driving. In your brain, you are running over everything Diane told you. “We have a solid case. We have two people lying on the stand for him. That shows the judge his case might not be viable.”

She’s right. Two of his witnesses lied right on the stand while swearing they were telling the truth. There is no way in hell that Theo will win. The drive to the court house seemed longer this time compared to the other trips. Maybe it was the anxiety that ate away at you. Or maybe it was because you took one wrong turn just to clear your head for a second longer. 

But all you know is your heart can’t help racing. 

When you park your car you get out and walk up the stairs. “Where’s Rafe?” That cocky voice sends shivers down your spine. Turning around you see Theo with his arm around Delia. “We broke up.” Delia looks shocked and takes a step forward. “Are you okay?” Her green eyes give you a look of pity and disbelief. A perfectly manicured hand rests on your bicep and for a moment you almost want to cry. Just as quickly as it came, it was ripped apart.

“Don’t coddle her.” He pulls Delia back to him and walks around you. Taking a deep breath you ground yourself then head in. You find Diane inside and sit down at the bench. “You okay sweetie?” She looks at you like she knows. Of course she does, Rafe probably informed them about the break up. Shit how are you supposed to pay for this now? “I’m okay.” She gives you a tight lipped smile before looking over some paperwork. 

“I understand why you did it. I would have too so don’t feel guilty.” In just two sentences you feel lighter. The chatter in the courtroom dies and everyone stands up. Judge Argent walks into the room and sits down. “Alright. The visitation period has concluded and we will be hearing from the last round of witnesses.” He calls up the social worker who slowly walks up to the stand. She swears her oath—fidgeting with her hands as Mr. Campbell walks up. 

“Mrs. Wilkins, you’ve observed both parents with the child correct.” She nods her head, agreeing with the statement. “How would you describe the relationship between Ms. Dunn and Violet.” Mrs. Wilkin sits up taller and adjusts the mic. “They had a great relationship. You could just see the way Violet opened up when she was around Mrs. Dunn. It was refreshing to see how much she was cared after since usually I see the worst in these types of cases.” Mr. Campbell looked back at Theo and then to the stand. 

“What does that mean exactly?” She laughs lighter in what seems like nerves. “Oh just that what Ms. Dunn is being accused of does not match her behavior. It is clear that her only focus was Violet and what was best for her.” You smile at the words. Diane grabs your hand under the table and gives it a squeeze. “Ms. Dunn held herself with dignity throughout this whole thing. I’ve seen parents argue and make snide remarks. That never happened with Mrs. Dunn.” 

Mr. Campbell paces the floor while thinking of the next thing to say. “Would you not say the relationship with Mr. Cameron would have affected that mother daughter bond?” You look over at Theo who just sends you a wink and a smirk. A giggle snaps your attention back to the stand. Mrs. Wilkin has a hand covering her mouth to cover up her laugh. “Sorry I just.” She abruptly stops her sentence trying to figure out what to say.

“I don’t think that’s fair to say. From what I’ve witnessed Mr. Cameron loved Violet as she was his daughter. There was a connection there. She adores him to the point she calls him dad.” A tear falls down your check. Violet still doesn’t understand that Rafe isn’t coming around anymore. Sometimes she calls for him then cries when she realizes he’s not coming.

“They seemed more like a family than Mr. Wixx and Violet.” Mr.Campbell looks appalled by the statement. “Why is that?” Judge Argent leans in close to the stand. “When observing Mr. Wixx and Violet's relationship, it seemed distant. As if there is no bond there.” A little smirk forms on your face when you see Theo’s fall. Serves him right. He thought he could lie his way out of this one but it’s biting him in the ass.

“Couldn’t you say that is due to Ms. Dunn with holding the relationship?” The probing question just drags them in deeper. “Oh god no.” Mr. Campbell interrupts her before she can continue. “No further questions your honor.” He tries to sit back down but the judge stops him. He stands with his back turned to the judge not wanting to go back. “I would like to hear what else she has to say. Continue Mrs. Wilkin.”

She smiles before continuing. “As I was saying it couldn’t have been that. It was as if he was barely trying, just putting up a good image. To be frank his fiance cared more about the child than him. She was always playing and taking care of Violet while he faked interactions with her.” The courtroom is at a standstill for a few moments. No one says anything just absorbing the information. “Mr. Campbel any further questions?”

Theo’s lawyer shakes his head no and sits down. Judge Argent looks at Diane. “No questions, your honor. Mr. Campbell answered all of mine.” He nods his head and gathers some papers. “But I would like to bring in two new witnesses.” Everyone turns to look at her as she stands to hand over files to the judge. He's silent as he reviews them.

“Your honor she can’t do this as all of the witnesses have already been approved.” The judge goes to close the file when Diane speaks up. “Sir with all respect I understand this is a late submission.” She takes a step closer. “But it calls into question Mr. Wixx’s real character and priorities.” Your brain starts to spin as you sit there. Why didn’t she tell you about this? Maybe she did and you were too busy with the whole Rafe thing to remember.

“I’ll allow it.”

With a large smile Diane turns around and nods her head to someone. “I’d like to first call up deputy Jason Kent.” Your head perks up at the familiar name. When you look up you make eye contact with the officer that helped you with the Delia almost kidnapping Violet situation. He gives you a wink as he passes before getting on the stand. 

“Mr. Kent can you tell us how you know Mr. Dunn and Violet.” He leans back while looking at Diane. “I was the responding officer when Delia tried to take Violet from a babysitter. Mr. Dunn had let Violet go with her boyfriend's sister to the store when Delia walked by and noticed the child. She went into the store and grabbed her before trying to walk out.”

You look over to Delia and see that her head is tilted down. Guilt starts to build for this being brought up again. “Listen, I understand where she was coming from. But as I was informed she hadn’t known the kid so it wasn’t possible for her to think she had the okay to do that.” You zone back to realize you missed a lot.

Diane had already finished question and Mr. Campbell is trying to find a fault in the statement. “No further questions.” Jason walks off of the stand and past you. A sense of relief goes through you as you realize there actually might be a chance. “I’d like to call up my second witness, Sheriff Victor Shoupe.” Your eyebrows knit together when he takes the stand. Why is he here?

“Sheriff were you away of the case between Ms. Dunn and Mr. Wixx fiance?” Diane stands tall in the middle of the room. The lights hit her in a way that akes it seem like she’s glowing. In your eyes she is. Throughout this whole thing she’s been a rock who has always helped you. “Yes but only after I was informed about the case being dropped for no reason at all.” Diane nods her head. “Can you elaborate?”

“Sheriff Tellmen deals with the distribution of cases and reports them to me. After the preliminary results of the investigation were categorized and reported — he switched the assigned cops to different cases. When new cops got the case, evidence went missing and then there was nothing. Tellmen shut the case and never informed me of it.”

You sit there for a moment enjoying the fact you weren’t crazy. You knew something was off but there just wasn’t proff. But here it is telling you the exact play by play. “Now is this normal behavior for a deputy?” The sheriff chuckles a bit and shakes his head. “Gosh no. But I do know that some of the deputies are known for taking bribes or miss placing evidence for personal gain.” Mr. Campbell stands up and slams his hands on the table. “Objection this is speculation.” Judge Argent raises a hand and objects to it. “Please continue.” 

“I looked into it and pulled Tellmen and the two other deputies aside. When looking at their bank statements, we could see large deposits in each account.” Diane stands right in front of Theo looking him dead in the eyes. “Were you able to track who sent these deposits?” Theo’s face is red, his nostrils are flared and yet Diane still stands there. “Yes, it was Theodore Mitch Wixx.”

“Thank you no further questions.” She walks back over and taps your shoulder. Mr. Campbell stood up to salvage his defense. “How are you certain it was my client that sent that money? It could have been anyone.” The sheriff shakes his head and throws it back. “Because we track the account number back to his personal bank. We also have a full blown confession from the deputies saying it was your client. The proof is in the report.” Without knowing what else to ask he retreats back to his seat.

“I have to review the information from both sides. We will reconvene in thirty minutes.” Everyone stands up and exits the courtroom. The thirty minutes goes by so slowly. You bite your nails trying to pass time as you hide away from Diane. She wants to talk about the whole break up but you’ve had enough of Jo and June. The last thing is for her to join in.

You sit back in the courtroom biting your thumb nail so hard that it starts to bleed. Diane hands you a tissue as the judge walks in and sits down. Holding your breath you wait desperately for any words. “After long consideration I have come to a verdict. When it comes to the domestic violence allegations against Mr. Wixx I find you guilty.” Your heart starts to beat faster. “When it comes to the custody Violet Ivey Dunn I grant full custody to Ms. Dunn.” Your heart fully stops.

The rest of the world ceases to exist even just for a second. You won. “Mr. Wixx you are allotted to back pay the child support you missed and continue to pay for in the future.” You stand up. “No, I don't want child support. Diane tries to sit you down but you don't. “I want him to sign his rights away. If he does that he’ll never see me again.” The room is silent as the judge stares at you.

“Mr. Wixx?” Theo stands up. “I’ll do it.” Delia snaps her head up and her mouth drops open. “Theo you can’t.” He turns around and gives her a look. “Shut up. I didn’t want to be here in the first place so stop with all of the whining and shut up.” She gets up tossing her engagement ring at him before walking out of the courtroom.

Judge Argent hits his gavel to gather everyone's attention. “Then it is settled. Mr. Wixx will sign over all of his rights. Congratulations Ms. Dunn you deserve it.” You and Diane hug each other tight. Tears keep coming from you and you can’t help but to cry. This nightmare is finally over. “Congrats.” Turning around, Theo comes into view.

“You might have gotten custody of Violet but you’ll never get him back. At least I took that away from you.” The bailiff comes over and handcuffs Theo to take him to holding. “He’ll probably just get put into the system then released. But at least it;s always on his record.” The both of you walk out laughing at just how crazy this all was. At the bottom of the stairs she stops you.

Tears well in her eyes. “I’m proud of you. But don’t let him win okay.” She pulls you in for a big up. She must workout because it feels like your bones are being crushed. When she pulls away you whip tears off your face. “Thank you for everything.” Diane smiles and gives you another quick hug. “Of course sweetie. I’ll always be here, okay don’t be afraid to call for anything.

Both of you part ways but you can’t help yourself from taking a moment. Standing in the middle of the parking lot you look at the sky seeing how bright it is. Everything will be okay. A loud engine catches your attention. At the very end of the lane is a familiar truck. You can see Rafe’s lower half of his face as the top half is blocked from your view. Taking a few steps closer you see his face. Both of you sit there staring at the other waiting to see which one breaks. 

You send him a smile and a thumbs up. Secretly hoping he knows you’re telling him you won. A big smile spreads to his face then he breaks off eye contact. You take a few more steps trying to see if you should run over and apologize. But then his eyes meet your again and you recognize the look. He’s broken but he wants you to think he’s fine. You stop in your tracks and his face falls further.

With a light nod he switches his gear to drive and leaves you there by yourself. The ache in your chest tells you that you made the wrong choice. Then his face comes back into view. The bright eyes and loving face wasn’t the one that just looked at you. You weren’t good for him. All you did was break his heart.

✦✦✦✦✦

“Can you just hurry up and get over yourself already?” Jo follows you around the house as you clean up Vi’s toys. She grabs a few stuffed animals and places them in the basket in the corner. “You didn’t see his face. I can’t do that to him.” She sighs dramatically and throws a stuffie at you. “It’s been weeks since you got custody so Theo’s threats don’t stand. Plus Valentine’s is around the corner. Imagine how cute a reconciliation would be for the most romantic holiday.”

“Are you just saying this so we can go on a double date with you and Kelce?” Jo laughs and closes the bin. “Yeah plus Wheezie and I are sick of waiting on you. Stop torturing the both of you.” Your nose wrinkles at the thought of them talking about your relationship. “Don’t give me that look. We both love you. Also you literally hang out with her everyday.”

“That’s different, it’s work. It’s been awkward anyway since I got custody.” You plop down on the couch. Grabbing the pillow you hug it into your chest. “I just need time.” Jo sits down next to you and wraps you in her arms. “Fine but if you don’t get it together by next month you won’t hear the end of it.” You laugh along with her knowing she’s telling the truth. 

“He loves you. But more importantly he loves Vi.” Your eyes flicker over to her. Tears start to fill your vision but you fight them back. “You deserve to be happy.” Jo pats you on the leg and gets up to head to her room. Lingering for a moment you look at the picture frame sitting on top of the fireplace. Staring back at you is Vi’s birthday photo of you and Rafe with Vi in the middle. There’s a bit of frosting already on her face somehow but it’s perfect.

You were happy then. Thinking back to how you feel now there’s something off. You’ve always been happy with just Vi, Jo and you. But that photo shows you the one thing you don’t think you can get back. Getting up you head to your room where Vi is sleeping on your bed. It’s like she knows you now need someone in the bed to even fall asleep. You adjust her, creating a small barrier so you don’t roll over on her.

Laying there you look at her sleeping face. She looks like Rafe which is such a weird thing to say. But they have the same nose and eyes. Hell she’s even picked up on his facial expressions. It’s been a little over a month and you still see him everyday. A little sob comes from your throat before you can even process the feeling. Burying your head into your pillow you cry quietly so you don’t wake her up.

Movement catches your attention. Lifting your head, you see Vi climb over the barrier with tired eyes. She lifts one of your arms and lays down so you can cuddle her. “I miss daddy too.” Hugging her a bit tighter, you kiss the top of her head. Her soft snores fill the room as she falls asleep. Soon you fall asleep trying to put everything behind you. 

The next morning you go through the motions of getting ready to head to the shop. It was a quiet morning as Jo took June so it was just the two of you. Vi’s been more quiet recently so she doesn’t really respond when you talk to her. You open the shop ushering Vi in and heading to the back. 

Vi goes over to the venus fly trap that you moved back here. The sun roof in the room casts a shining light over it. Even from where you are standing it looks beautiful. She sits down next to it just staring down. “Baby you okay?” Her blue eyes look at you and you swear for a moment she looks betrayed. She shakes her head before looking back at the plant. 

The front door’s bell rings. Sarah isn’t supposed to come in today and Wheezie gets here later. Looking through the curtains you see Delia standing in the middle of the shop looking around. In her hands she’s holding a small basket with different chocolates. The two of you stare at each other for a second before she breaks the silence. “Uh…I broke up with Theo.” A lightness fills you. Hearing that she left him is honestly really relieving.

“I thought when my dad introduced us he was great. But after everything.” She doesn’t know what to really say. “I just couldn’t support that. I’m really sorry for my part in all of it.” You look back to make sure Vi is okay before stepping out. “It wasn’t your fault. He’s always been like that.” She looks over to the side sniffling a bit. Even though she’s not looking at you, you can tell that she’s crying.

“When I was thirteen I got in a really bad accident. I can’t have kids due to it so when I found out Theo had a kid.” She takes a deep breath and whips the tears. “He lied and told me he didn’t know. If I knew the truth I wouldn’t have supported him. But when the cracks started to show I was trying to foul myself. I am really sorry for helping him through all of this.”

The curtain behind you shifts and Vi hides behind your legs. Delia’s eyes flicker to her and you can see the longing in them. “Anyway I got you both a Valentine's gift as an apology.” She places the basket on the counter. Without looking back she goes to walk out but you stop her. “I’m sorry he got you too.” Delia turns around and her eyes shine with tears. You place a hand on Vi’s back knowing exactly how she probably feels.

“He’s the perfect abuser. You don’t realize it before it’s too late. I just really hope that you’re okay.” A watery laugh comes out from her just as a customer comes in. The old man that comes in for his wife’s flowers pauses when he sees the two of you. He clears his throat as he goes to head to the door. “You don’t have to go. Vi has some pretty flowers she wants to show you.” Benny turns around and walks a bit closer.

“Now how could I say no to the best florist.” He sends you a playful wink as he takes Vi’s hand so she can show him some flowers. When they are in the next aisle you head over to the front register. Delia stands there not knowing if she should stay or go. Finding a sticky note, you write down your phone number. “If you ever need to talk, here's my number. It took me a long time to get over what he did to me. But trust me in the end you’ll be okay.”

She takes the note from your hand, with a shocked face. “Thank you.” Her hand shakes as she puts the piece of paper away. Something within you burns for a second while you watch Delia leave the store. As if you were ridding yourself of an issue you realized you still held. Theo is fully out of your life now. Yes all that pain he caused you is still there but it doesn;t define you anymore. 

Well maybe a part of it still does but only because it’s fresh.

You check Benny out by giving him a few free flowers because they would look nice in the array he made. After that you go around the shop taking inventory of what you have. Next you go in the back and stock the front with what you have. After what seems like forever you finally finished. You're a little out of breath which isn’t usual. Heading to the back you get started on some orders you have.

Violet helps you with arranging the bouquets while you trim and de-thorn them. You get through three bouquets before you realize it’s already lunch time. “Alright baby, let's go get lunch.” Vi’s eyes light up and she stumbles her way to the front of the store. When you catch up to her, she’s staring at you with a blank stare. “Daddy?”

That one word breaks you. 

“He’s not here baby.” She frowns as you hold her hand as you two walk down the street to the market. The shops seem busy with people walking in and out. The weather isn’t that bad so it’s nice seeing so many people out. Reaching the market, you shop around finding something to eat. With everything in your hands you head back to the shop to open up. 

You give Vi her food as you pick on the stuff you got. Customers come in and out finding flowers for loved ones. Even online orders came in meaning you had more bouquet’s to make. Good thing valentines is a week away so you don’t need to make all of them right now. 

You’re up front eating your snacks as you look over paperwork. “What the hell are you eating?” You look up to see Wheezie walking in with her school bag. Vi runs up to her and jumps in her arms. Looking down at your plate of sliced banana with chocolate peanut butter spread with a side of pickles you can see what she means. “Didn’t pack a lunch today so I just went and grabbed some things.” Technically it’s not a lie as you did forget to pack a lunch.

She gives you a weird look. A customer comes in and you whip your hands with an alcohol pad before using hand sanitizer. You move your plate behind you and Wheezie makes her way over. She takes one of your banana slices, humming in approval. “I take it back. I like bananas. The pickles are weird though.” She laughs as he takes the stack of orders to go organize them by dates. 

Once the customer is out of the store you go back to your stack. Eventually you and Wheezie get through the orders for the next few days. When you get home you help Jo with dinner. You kinda run through the motions so tired that you just want to be in bed. Jo decided to stay in the house tonight meaning she’s sharing a bed with you. 

The worst part is she moves around so much in her sleep. In the middle of the night you sneak out of bed. All you feel is Jo moving around and your stomach growling. Grabbing the bread, peanut butter, marshmallow fluff, chocolate sauce, and a pickle you make a sandwich. Quiet footsteps come from down the hall. “Is that what I think it is?” You turn around to see Jo looking at you.

“Umm yeah.” You shrug not knowing how else to reply. Going back to what you were eating you forget she was standing there for a moment. “You didn’t have your period last month.” She says it as a statement. Not her asking you a question just telling you something. As if she was waiting for you to catch up. Without waiting for you to catch up she grabs your hand and drags you out to the little house in the back. 

WHen you enter you are assaulted with what is the most hideous wallpaper ever. The striped cross pattern of green and mustard yellow are not what you expected June to pick. Nicknacks are all over the place in various ranges. No matter how many times you’ve been in here it will never change. Jo drags you to the bathroom and places a box of pregnancy tests. “Take it.”

The two of you do this weird stare off not trying to back down. “Take the fucking test or I swear I will call him.” Your head snaps up. “Don’t you dare.” She laughs at you and takes out two tests to slightly open them for you. “You need to get over your fear of him hating you. Stop punishing yourself for protecting your kid when that’s what you’re supposed to do.”

She stares at you as you just look at the tests. She’s right your period is late. A fact that you ignored for the sheer thought of it being the stress. Plus when has your period ever not been late? “Okay so strip.” You giggle at her comment. “I meant from the waist down so you can pee. Fuck that sounds worse.” Saving her from herself you grab the test and usher her out of the room. 

You quickly take the test and bring Jo back in. She tries to lighten the mood but it just brings you back to when you found out about Vi. It’s practically a play by play of the last time. The timer goes off and you stand over the tests. Not really wanting to look at them, you turn to Jo. She gets up and grabs your hand before flipping them over. The both of you look down. “Fuck.” Jo squeezes your hand harder as you read the tests.

Positive

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[writingroom21]

Sweet Escape

Pairing: Rafe x single mom reader

Summary: Moving to Kildare with your best friend and daughter was the perfect move. The little island is perfect, the people are nice, and you are finally at peace. Then Rafe comes in with his perfect smile and charm, sweeping you off your feet. The only issue is if you are ready to let someone else in.

Warnings: none

Wc: 4.8K

Chapter 13: unexpected surprise

“I left an extra register of cash in the safe in the back. The next shipment comes in today but they are going to put everything back there so you don’t need to worry about it.” Sarah nods her head and looks anywhere but you after you finish. “Sounds good. Good luck today.” It’s been awkward working with both of the girls after the break up. They both didn’t really understand at first.

Rafe told them you two just drifted apart. He didn’t want them to be mad at you but they knew something wasn’t right. You tp;d them the truth and Sarah came around to the whole fact. Wheezie understands but she’s still really upset about it. But at least they aren’t giving you the cold shoulder. 

“Thanks.” You give her a tight lipped smile as you walk out of the shop and to your car. Starting the car, you take in a few deep breaths. “Everything is going to be okay.” You whisper to yourself as you start driving. In your brain, you are running over everything Diane told you. “We have a solid case. We have two people lying on the stand for him. That shows the judge his case might not be viable.”

She’s right. Two of his witnesses lied right on the stand while swearing they were telling the truth. There is no way in hell that Theo will win. The drive to the court house seemed longer this time compared to the other trips. Maybe it was the anxiety that ate away at you. Or maybe it was because you took one wrong turn just to clear your head for a second longer. 

But all you know is your heart can’t help racing. 

When you park your car you get out and walk up the stairs. “Where’s Rafe?” That cocky voice sends shivers down your spine. Turning around you see Theo with his arm around Delia. “We broke up.” Delia looks shocked and takes a step forward. “Are you okay?” Her green eyes give you a look of pity and disbelief. A perfectly manicured hand rests on your bicep and for a moment you almost want to cry. Just as quickly as it came, it was ripped apart.

“Don’t coddle her.” He pulls Delia back to him and walks around you. Taking a deep breath you ground yourself then head in. You find Diane inside and sit down at the bench. “You okay sweetie?” She looks at you like she knows. Of course she does, Rafe probably informed them about the break up. Shit how are you supposed to pay for this now? “I’m okay.” She gives you a tight lipped smile before looking over some paperwork. 

“I understand why you did it. I would have too so don’t feel guilty.” In just two sentences you feel lighter. The chatter in the courtroom dies and everyone stands up. Judge Argent walks into the room and sits down. “Alright. The visitation period has concluded and we will be hearing from the last round of witnesses.” He calls up the social worker who slowly walks up to the stand. She swears her oath—fidgeting with her hands as Mr. Campbell walks up. 

“Mrs. Wilkins, you’ve observed both parents with the child correct.” She nods her head, agreeing with the statement. “How would you describe the relationship between Ms. Dunn and Violet.” Mrs. Wilkin sits up taller and adjusts the mic. “They had a great relationship. You could just see the way Violet opened up when she was around Mrs. Dunn. It was refreshing to see how much she was cared after since usually I see the worst in these types of cases.” Mr. Campbell looked back at Theo and then to the stand. 

“What does that mean exactly?” She laughs lighter in what seems like nerves. “Oh just that what Ms. Dunn is being accused of does not match her behavior. It is clear that her only focus was Violet and what was best for her.” You smile at the words. Diane grabs your hand under the table and gives it a squeeze. “Ms. Dunn held herself with dignity throughout this whole thing. I’ve seen parents argue and make snide remarks. That never happened with Mrs. Dunn.” 

Mr. Campbell paces the floor while thinking of the next thing to say. “Would you not say the relationship with Mr. Cameron would have affected that mother daughter bond?” You look over at Theo who just sends you a wink and a smirk. A giggle snaps your attention back to the stand. Mrs. Wilkin has a hand covering her mouth to cover up her laugh. “Sorry I just.” She abruptly stops her sentence trying to figure out what to say.

“I don’t think that’s fair to say. From what I’ve witnessed Mr. Cameron loved Violet as she was his daughter. There was a connection there. She adores him to the point she calls him dad.” A tear falls down your check. Violet still doesn’t understand that Rafe isn’t coming around anymore. Sometimes she calls for him then cries when she realizes he’s not coming.

“They seemed more like a family than Mr. Wixx and Violet.” Mr.Campbell looks appalled by the statement. “Why is that?” Judge Argent leans in close to the stand. “When observing Mr. Wixx and Violet's relationship, it seemed distant. As if there is no bond there.” A little smirk forms on your face when you see Theo’s fall. Serves him right. He thought he could lie his way out of this one but it’s biting him in the ass.

“Couldn’t you say that is due to Ms. Dunn with holding the relationship?” The probing question just drags them in deeper. “Oh god no.” Mr. Campbell interrupts her before she can continue. “No further questions your honor.” He tries to sit back down but the judge stops him. He stands with his back turned to the judge not wanting to go back. “I would like to hear what else she has to say. Continue Mrs. Wilkin.”

She smiles before continuing. “As I was saying it couldn’t have been that. It was as if he was barely trying, just putting up a good image. To be frank his fiance cared more about the child than him. She was always playing and taking care of Violet while he faked interactions with her.” The courtroom is at a standstill for a few moments. No one says anything just absorbing the information. “Mr. Campbel any further questions?”

Theo’s lawyer shakes his head no and sits down. Judge Argent looks at Diane. “No questions, your honor. Mr. Campbell answered all of mine.” He nods his head and gathers some papers. “But I would like to bring in two new witnesses.” Everyone turns to look at her as she stands to hand over files to the judge. He's silent as he reviews them.

“Your honor she can’t do this as all of the witnesses have already been approved.” The judge goes to close the file when Diane speaks up. “Sir with all respect I understand this is a late submission.” She takes a step closer. “But it calls into question Mr. Wixx’s real character and priorities.” Your brain starts to spin as you sit there. Why didn’t she tell you about this? Maybe she did and you were too busy with the whole Rafe thing to remember.

“I’ll allow it.”

With a large smile Diane turns around and nods her head to someone. “I’d like to first call up deputy Jason Kent.” Your head perks up at the familiar name. When you look up you make eye contact with the officer that helped you with the Delia almost kidnapping Violet situation. He gives you a wink as he passes before getting on the stand. 

“Mr. Kent can you tell us how you know Mr. Dunn and Violet.” He leans back while looking at Diane. “I was the responding officer when Delia tried to take Violet from a babysitter. Mr. Dunn had let Violet go with her boyfriend's sister to the store when Delia walked by and noticed the child. She went into the store and grabbed her before trying to walk out.”

You look over to Delia and see that her head is tilted down. Guilt starts to build for this being brought up again. “Listen, I understand where she was coming from. But as I was informed she hadn’t known the kid so it wasn’t possible for her to think she had the okay to do that.” You zone back to realize you missed a lot.

Diane had already finished question and Mr. Campbell is trying to find a fault in the statement. “No further questions.” Jason walks off of the stand and past you. A sense of relief goes through you as you realize there actually might be a chance. “I’d like to call up my second witness, Sheriff Victor Shoupe.” Your eyebrows knit together when he takes the stand. Why is he here?

“Sheriff were you away of the case between Ms. Dunn and Mr. Wixx fiance?” Diane stands tall in the middle of the room. The lights hit her in a way that akes it seem like she’s glowing. In your eyes she is. Throughout this whole thing she’s been a rock who has always helped you. “Yes but only after I was informed about the case being dropped for no reason at all.” Diane nods her head. “Can you elaborate?”

“Sheriff Tellmen deals with the distribution of cases and reports them to me. After the preliminary results of the investigation were categorized and reported — he switched the assigned cops to different cases. When new cops got the case, evidence went missing and then there was nothing. Tellmen shut the case and never informed me of it.”

You sit there for a moment enjoying the fact you weren’t crazy. You knew something was off but there just wasn’t proff. But here it is telling you the exact play by play. “Now is this normal behavior for a deputy?” The sheriff chuckles a bit and shakes his head. “Gosh no. But I do know that some of the deputies are known for taking bribes or miss placing evidence for personal gain.” Mr. Campbell stands up and slams his hands on the table. “Objection this is speculation.” Judge Argent raises a hand and objects to it. “Please continue.” 

“I looked into it and pulled Tellmen and the two other deputies aside. When looking at their bank statements, we could see large deposits in each account.” Diane stands right in front of Theo looking him dead in the eyes. “Were you able to track who sent these deposits?” Theo’s face is red, his nostrils are flared and yet Diane still stands there. “Yes, it was Theodore Mitch Wixx.”

“Thank you no further questions.” She walks back over and taps your shoulder. Mr. Campbell stood up to salvage his defense. “How are you certain it was my client that sent that money? It could have been anyone.” The sheriff shakes his head and throws it back. “Because we track the account number back to his personal bank. We also have a full blown confession from the deputies saying it was your client. The proof is in the report.” Without knowing what else to ask he retreats back to his seat.

“I have to review the information from both sides. We will reconvene in thirty minutes.” Everyone stands up and exits the courtroom. The thirty minutes goes by so slowly. You bite your nails trying to pass time as you hide away from Diane. She wants to talk about the whole break up but you’ve had enough of Jo and June. The last thing is for her to join in.

You sit back in the courtroom biting your thumb nail so hard that it starts to bleed. Diane hands you a tissue as the judge walks in and sits down. Holding your breath you wait desperately for any words. “After long consideration I have come to a verdict. When it comes to the domestic violence allegations against Mr. Wixx I find you guilty.” Your heart starts to beat faster. “When it comes to the custody Violet Ivey Dunn I grant full custody to Ms. Dunn.” Your heart fully stops.

The rest of the world ceases to exist even just for a second. You won. “Mr. Wixx you are allotted to back pay the child support you missed and continue to pay for in the future.” You stand up. “No, I don't want child support. Diane tries to sit you down but you don't. “I want him to sign his rights away. If he does that he’ll never see me again.” The room is silent as the judge stares at you.

“Mr. Wixx?” Theo stands up. “I’ll do it.” Delia snaps her head up and her mouth drops open. “Theo you can’t.” He turns around and gives her a look. “Shut up. I didn’t want to be here in the first place so stop with all of the whining and shut up.” She gets up tossing her engagement ring at him before walking out of the courtroom.

Judge Argent hits his gavel to gather everyone's attention. “Then it is settled. Mr. Wixx will sign over all of his rights. Congratulations Ms. Dunn you deserve it.” You and Diane hug each other tight. Tears keep coming from you and you can’t help but to cry. This nightmare is finally over. “Congrats.” Turning around, Theo comes into view.

“You might have gotten custody of Violet but you’ll never get him back. At least I took that away from you.” The bailiff comes over and handcuffs Theo to take him to holding. “He’ll probably just get put into the system then released. But at least it;s always on his record.” The both of you walk out laughing at just how crazy this all was. At the bottom of the stairs she stops you.

Tears well in her eyes. “I’m proud of you. But don’t let him win okay.” She pulls you in for a big up. She must workout because it feels like your bones are being crushed. When she pulls away you whip tears off your face. “Thank you for everything.” Diane smiles and gives you another quick hug. “Of course sweetie. I’ll always be here, okay don’t be afraid to call for anything.

Both of you part ways but you can’t help yourself from taking a moment. Standing in the middle of the parking lot you look at the sky seeing how bright it is. Everything will be okay. A loud engine catches your attention. At the very end of the lane is a familiar truck. You can see Rafe’s lower half of his face as the top half is blocked from your view. Taking a few steps closer you see his face. Both of you sit there staring at the other waiting to see which one breaks. 

You send him a smile and a thumbs up. Secretly hoping he knows you’re telling him you won. A big smile spreads to his face then he breaks off eye contact. You take a few more steps trying to see if you should run over and apologize. But then his eyes meet your again and you recognize the look. He’s broken but he wants you to think he’s fine. You stop in your tracks and his face falls further.

With a light nod he switches his gear to drive and leaves you there by yourself. The ache in your chest tells you that you made the wrong choice. Then his face comes back into view. The bright eyes and loving face wasn’t the one that just looked at you. You weren’t good for him. All you did was break his heart.

✦✦✦✦✦

“Can you just hurry up and get over yourself already?” Jo follows you around the house as you clean up Vi’s toys. She grabs a few stuffed animals and places them in the basket in the corner. “You didn’t see his face. I can’t do that to him.” She sighs dramatically and throws a stuffie at you. “It’s been weeks since you got custody so Theo’s threats don’t stand. Plus Valentine’s is around the corner. Imagine how cute a reconciliation would be for the most romantic holiday.”

“Are you just saying this so we can go on a double date with you and Kelce?” Jo laughs and closes the bin. “Yeah plus Wheezie and I are sick of waiting on you. Stop torturing the both of you.” Your nose wrinkles at the thought of them talking about your relationship. “Don’t give me that look. We both love you. Also you literally hang out with her everyday.”

“That’s different, it’s work. It’s been awkward anyway since I got custody.” You plop down on the couch. Grabbing the pillow you hug it into your chest. “I just need time.” Jo sits down next to you and wraps you in her arms. “Fine but if you don’t get it together by next month you won’t hear the end of it.” You laugh along with her knowing she’s telling the truth. 

“He loves you. But more importantly he loves Vi.” Your eyes flicker over to her. Tears start to fill your vision but you fight them back. “You deserve to be happy.” Jo pats you on the leg and gets up to head to her room. Lingering for a moment you look at the picture frame sitting on top of the fireplace. Staring back at you is Vi’s birthday photo of you and Rafe with Vi in the middle. There’s a bit of frosting already on her face somehow but it’s perfect.

You were happy then. Thinking back to how you feel now there’s something off. You’ve always been happy with just Vi, Jo and you. But that photo shows you the one thing you don’t think you can get back. Getting up you head to your room where Vi is sleeping on your bed. It’s like she knows you now need someone in the bed to even fall asleep. You adjust her, creating a small barrier so you don’t roll over on her.

Laying there you look at her sleeping face. She looks like Rafe which is such a weird thing to say. But they have the same nose and eyes. Hell she’s even picked up on his facial expressions. It’s been a little over a month and you still see him everyday. A little sob comes from your throat before you can even process the feeling. Burying your head into your pillow you cry quietly so you don’t wake her up.

Movement catches your attention. Lifting your head, you see Vi climb over the barrier with tired eyes. She lifts one of your arms and lays down so you can cuddle her. “I miss daddy too.” Hugging her a bit tighter, you kiss the top of her head. Her soft snores fill the room as she falls asleep. Soon you fall asleep trying to put everything behind you. 

The next morning you go through the motions of getting ready to head to the shop. It was a quiet morning as Jo took June so it was just the two of you. Vi’s been more quiet recently so she doesn’t really respond when you talk to her. You open the shop ushering Vi in and heading to the back. 

Vi goes over to the venus fly trap that you moved back here. The sun roof in the room casts a shining light over it. Even from where you are standing it looks beautiful. She sits down next to it just staring down. “Baby you okay?” Her blue eyes look at you and you swear for a moment she looks betrayed. She shakes her head before looking back at the plant. 

The front door’s bell rings. Sarah isn’t supposed to come in today and Wheezie gets here later. Looking through the curtains you see Delia standing in the middle of the shop looking around. In her hands she’s holding a small basket with different chocolates. The two of you stare at each other for a second before she breaks the silence. “Uh…I broke up with Theo.” A lightness fills you. Hearing that she left him is honestly really relieving.

“I thought when my dad introduced us he was great. But after everything.” She doesn’t know what to really say. “I just couldn’t support that. I’m really sorry for my part in all of it.” You look back to make sure Vi is okay before stepping out. “It wasn’t your fault. He’s always been like that.” She looks over to the side sniffling a bit. Even though she’s not looking at you, you can tell that she’s crying.

“When I was thirteen I got in a really bad accident. I can’t have kids due to it so when I found out Theo had a kid.” She takes a deep breath and whips the tears. “He lied and told me he didn’t know. If I knew the truth I wouldn’t have supported him. But when the cracks started to show I was trying to foul myself. I am really sorry for helping him through all of this.”

The curtain behind you shifts and Vi hides behind your legs. Delia’s eyes flicker to her and you can see the longing in them. “Anyway I got you both a Valentine's gift as an apology.” She places the basket on the counter. Without looking back she goes to walk out but you stop her. “I’m sorry he got you too.” Delia turns around and her eyes shine with tears. You place a hand on Vi’s back knowing exactly how she probably feels.

“He’s the perfect abuser. You don’t realize it before it’s too late. I just really hope that you’re okay.” A watery laugh comes out from her just as a customer comes in. The old man that comes in for his wife’s flowers pauses when he sees the two of you. He clears his throat as he goes to head to the door. “You don’t have to go. Vi has some pretty flowers she wants to show you.” Benny turns around and walks a bit closer.

“Now how could I say no to the best florist.” He sends you a playful wink as he takes Vi’s hand so she can show him some flowers. When they are in the next aisle you head over to the front register. Delia stands there not knowing if she should stay or go. Finding a sticky note, you write down your phone number. “If you ever need to talk, here's my number. It took me a long time to get over what he did to me. But trust me in the end you’ll be okay.”

She takes the note from your hand, with a shocked face. “Thank you.” Her hand shakes as she puts the piece of paper away. Something within you burns for a second while you watch Delia leave the store. As if you were ridding yourself of an issue you realized you still held. Theo is fully out of your life now. Yes all that pain he caused you is still there but it doesn;t define you anymore. 

Well maybe a part of it still does but only because it’s fresh.

You check Benny out by giving him a few free flowers because they would look nice in the array he made. After that you go around the shop taking inventory of what you have. Next you go in the back and stock the front with what you have. After what seems like forever you finally finished. You're a little out of breath which isn’t usual. Heading to the back you get started on some orders you have.

Violet helps you with arranging the bouquets while you trim and de-thorn them. You get through three bouquets before you realize it’s already lunch time. “Alright baby, let's go get lunch.” Vi’s eyes light up and she stumbles her way to the front of the store. When you catch up to her, she’s staring at you with a blank stare. “Daddy?”

That one word breaks you. 

“He’s not here baby.” She frowns as you hold her hand as you two walk down the street to the market. The shops seem busy with people walking in and out. The weather isn’t that bad so it’s nice seeing so many people out. Reaching the market, you shop around finding something to eat. With everything in your hands you head back to the shop to open up. 

You give Vi her food as you pick on the stuff you got. Customers come in and out finding flowers for loved ones. Even online orders came in meaning you had more bouquet’s to make. Good thing valentines is a week away so you don’t need to make all of them right now. 

You’re up front eating your snacks as you look over paperwork. “What the hell are you eating?” You look up to see Wheezie walking in with her school bag. Vi runs up to her and jumps in her arms. Looking down at your plate of sliced banana with chocolate peanut butter spread with a side of pickles you can see what she means. “Didn’t pack a lunch today so I just went and grabbed some things.” Technically it’s not a lie as you did forget to pack a lunch.

She gives you a weird look. A customer comes in and you whip your hands with an alcohol pad before using hand sanitizer. You move your plate behind you and Wheezie makes her way over. She takes one of your banana slices, humming in approval. “I take it back. I like bananas. The pickles are weird though.” She laughs as he takes the stack of orders to go organize them by dates. 

Once the customer is out of the store you go back to your stack. Eventually you and Wheezie get through the orders for the next few days. When you get home you help Jo with dinner. You kinda run through the motions so tired that you just want to be in bed. Jo decided to stay in the house tonight meaning she’s sharing a bed with you. 

The worst part is she moves around so much in her sleep. In the middle of the night you sneak out of bed. All you feel is Jo moving around and your stomach growling. Grabbing the bread, peanut butter, marshmallow fluff, chocolate sauce, and a pickle you make a sandwich. Quiet footsteps come from down the hall. “Is that what I think it is?” You turn around to see Jo looking at you.

“Umm yeah.” You shrug not knowing how else to reply. Going back to what you were eating you forget she was standing there for a moment. “You didn’t have your period last month.” She says it as a statement. Not her asking you a question just telling you something. As if she was waiting for you to catch up. Without waiting for you to catch up she grabs your hand and drags you out to the little house in the back. 

WHen you enter you are assaulted with what is the most hideous wallpaper ever. The striped cross pattern of green and mustard yellow are not what you expected June to pick. Nicknacks are all over the place in various ranges. No matter how many times you’ve been in here it will never change. Jo drags you to the bathroom and places a box of pregnancy tests. “Take it.”

The two of you do this weird stare off not trying to back down. “Take the fucking test or I swear I will call him.” Your head snaps up. “Don’t you dare.” She laughs at you and takes out two tests to slightly open them for you. “You need to get over your fear of him hating you. Stop punishing yourself for protecting your kid when that’s what you’re supposed to do.”

She stares at you as you just look at the tests. She’s right your period is late. A fact that you ignored for the sheer thought of it being the stress. Plus when has your period ever not been late? “Okay so strip.” You giggle at her comment. “I meant from the waist down so you can pee. Fuck that sounds worse.” Saving her from herself you grab the test and usher her out of the room. 

You quickly take the test and bring Jo back in. She tries to lighten the mood but it just brings you back to when you found out about Vi. It’s practically a play by play of the last time. The timer goes off and you stand over the tests. Not really wanting to look at them, you turn to Jo. She gets up and grabs your hand before flipping them over. The both of you look down. “Fuck.” Jo squeezes your hand harder as you read the tests.

Positive

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Ouch…my poor babies

FINE LINE

✧ 𝙱𝚏!𝚁𝚊𝚏𝚎 𝚡 𝙶𝚏!𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛 - 𝚋𝚕𝚞𝚛𝚋

✧ 𝚂𝚞𝚖𝚖𝚊𝚛𝚢: 𝚁𝚊𝚏𝚎 𝚊𝚕𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚐𝚘𝚎𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚑𝚎𝚕𝚙 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚙𝚛𝚘𝚋𝚕𝚎𝚖𝚜. 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚍𝚘𝚗’𝚝 𝚖𝚒𝚗𝚍, 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚑𝚎𝚕𝚙𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚑𝚒𝚖 𝚎𝚜𝚌𝚊𝚙𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚍𝚎𝚕𝚞𝚜𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚜𝚙𝚒𝚛𝚊𝚕 𝚒𝚗 𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚍 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝚑𝚎 𝚐𝚎𝚝𝚜 𝚝𝚘 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚙𝚘𝚒𝚗𝚝. 𝙷𝚎 𝚗𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚝𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚐𝚛𝚊𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚍, 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚑𝚒𝚜 𝚙𝚎𝚛𝚜𝚘𝚗 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚑𝚎 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚍 𝚢𝚘𝚞. 𝙾𝚗𝚎 𝚗𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝, 𝚒𝚝’𝚜 𝚝𝚘𝚘 𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚍 𝚝𝚘 𝚙𝚞𝚕𝚕 𝚁𝚊𝚏𝚎 𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚘𝚏 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎 𝚑𝚎 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚊𝚗𝚍 𝚒𝚝 𝚋𝚎𝚐𝚊𝚗 𝚝𝚘 𝚊𝚏𝚏𝚎𝚌𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞, 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚎𝚒𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚘𝚏 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚒𝚣𝚒𝚗𝚐.

✧ 𝚆𝚊𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐𝚜: 𝙼𝙳𝙽𝙸- 𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚘𝚗𝚐 𝚝𝚘𝚙𝚒𝚌𝚜 𝚍𝚒𝚜𝚌𝚞𝚜𝚜𝚎𝚍- 𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚛𝚢 𝚛𝚊𝚏𝚎, 𝚙𝚊𝚜𝚝 𝚝𝚛𝚊𝚞𝚖𝚊, 𝚖𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜 𝚘𝚏 𝚌𝚑𝚒𝚕𝚍𝚑𝚘𝚘𝚍 𝚊𝚋𝚞𝚜𝚎, 𝚍𝚛𝚞𝚐𝚜, 𝚍𝚘𝚖𝚎𝚜𝚝𝚒𝚌 𝚟𝚒𝚘𝚕𝚎𝚗𝚌𝚎.

✧ 𝚁𝚎𝚚𝚞𝚎𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚍 𝚑𝚎𝚛𝚎

✧ 𝙼𝙰𝚂𝚃𝙴𝚁𝙻𝙸𝚂𝚃 | 𝚃𝙰𝙶𝙻𝙸𝚂𝚃

"He just doesn't care no matter what I do. I didn't do enough for the business? I step. I step up, everything I do is wrong. I get mad and depressed and I turn to drugs and he calls me a loser and throws me out. You help me get clean, I get clean and he doesn't trust me and he talks shit about you."

"I know, Rafe,” you tried to speak softly, careful.. “It's not your fault. Please sit down and breathe.”

But he wasn’t hearing you anymore.

You are usually so good and reigning Rafe back in. Whether it was through his withdrawals or arguments with Sarah. But this? This is everything he kept bottled up with his dad. You don't see him coming down from this for a while.

He continues, "I'm sorry I can't be like your perfect little princess, Sarah. Oh, cause she does absolutely nothing wrong. Not like run away from our family to live some bullshit fantasy life with that pouge. She doesn't give a shit about our family the way I do."

You watched helplessly as his fists clenched together. They balled up so tight his knuckles turned white and trembled. He moved over to your dresser and slammed his fist down hard.

BANG

Something, glass, maybe one of your candle holders, shattered on the floor, the sharp sound ricocheting through the room like a gunshot.

Your whole body jolted with fear you had buried for years.

Rafe's head whips around from the sound of you gasping. Your instincts kicked in, causing you to drop to the floor, tuck your head and you arms came up over it, in a protective stance.

The second he sees you like that any anger he had at his dad had diminished, his attention fully on you. "Hey, hey baby, it's ok. Everything's good." He was crouched down beside you but his voice seemed miles away.

His hands ran up and down your arms hoping the familiarity of his touch would help you. You continued to stay stuck in that position. Only now, tears were streaming down your face. It became hard to breathe, no matter how hard you tried to punk in a deep breath.

“I didn’t mean to scare you. I didn’t…”

You looked at him, vision blurry, and pressed your palm to his cheek. The look on his face was full of worry and panic. It gave you the realization that he’s never seen you like this. Scared, lifeless, broken. “I’m ok.”

“No you’re not. I’m sorry, I wasn’t mad at you. I’d never hurt you.”

“I know…” You wanted to get out more but you really didn’t know what to say.

“What was that? If you know why are you in the floor now baby?

“The uh- the sound.”

Rafe was confused. The sound made you like this? It wasn’t loud to him, but maybe he was just stuck in his own head. You never got into it with Rafe about your childhood. All he knew was that it’s always been you and your mom. You finally got in a deep breath and was able to subdue your tears just enough to speak.

“When I was little…” you began, your voice was barely a whisper. Almost as if you spoke it too loud all the progress you’ve made would slip away. You worked with a trauma specialist for years to get you out of the hole you buried yourself into. To you, was a hole built for protection. To everyone else, if you had dug just a little deeper, it probably would’ve collapsed in and you would have never been able to be rescued.

“…my dad, he wasn’t nice. He drank too much. He was a really scary man when he was drunk. He’d destroy the whole house for fun, just to get fake getting mad that it was a mess. He’d drag my mom by the hair to clean it up as soon as she stepped in from work. She’d be up the whole night.”

Rafe stared at you in disbelief. You began to speak about it more. He was lucky for that, because he really had no idea what to say.

“When it first started he’d only take it out on my mom. I’d hide in the closet in my room and I’d cover my ears and hum to drown out the screams. But as I got older I’d face his wrath too. He started to know where I would hide and he’d hit me for being a little pussy.” Your eyes watered again at that part, “I was 8, I was scared. Most morning I expected to wake up and find my mom dead.”

You continued. Now that you started, it seemed as if you couldn’t stop. It was like a mudslide that ripped down the side of the mountain, no ending in sight. It was relentless and traumatizing all over again. Rafe knew now, and the words were impossible to hold in.

“He’d cornered me in the living room one day when I was 12 and he threw empty bottles at the wall behind me. One after the other. The glass rained over me scraping my arms as I covered myself. It was so loud, it sounded like gunshots piercing my ear drums. I wanted to run but I couldn’t. I was frozen. My brain told me to move, to go, but I didn’t.”

Your tears were back, free flowing as you recount the worst day of your life. “He wasn’t even supposed to be home. My mom came back with one of her friends and saw what was happening. She ran over to her me and her friend called the police.”

By this point Rafe had adjusted himself and cradled you in his arms as he listened. His arms would tighten around you when you’d get to a really tough part of your past. Almost as if he was now carrying this weight with you. It hurt him to know this.

“When they got there, my mom ran me outside and my dad had been resistant. I could hear him yelling and the cops yelling back and then it was just silent. My mom still hasn’t told me how he died. But maybe he fell and hit his head. I don’t know. All I know is that we’re free now but it took a really long time.”

It was easy for Rafe to put the pieces together. The story you just told, the loud noise, the position it put you in. His eyes went glassy and his own tears dropped onto his cheeks.

“Fuck, baby, I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”

You kissed him lightly on his cheek. Silently tell him it’s ok. He didn’t know. You really didn’t ever plan for him to know. Your body just took over in that moment and everything happened too fast.

“I’d never hurt you, you know that right?”

“Of course, I do Rafe.”

He took a deep breath. “I’ll never get mad around like that again.”

You looked him straight in the eye, letting him know you were serious, “never diminish your feelings, just because of what I’ve said. You coming to me for help, it means everything to me. I want to be that person for you, I didn’t let myself have that for a long time and it was terrible.”

“I just get so angry, I can’t help it. He makes me feel useless. I just can’t help it sometimes.” His head drops in embarrassment.

“I don’t need you to be perfect, Rafe.” You grab his face with both of your hands so that he can look at you again. “I just need to feel safe, and I promise you give me that.”

He gave you a long kiss on the forehead and pulled you in close. He held you tightly, like you’d slip away and he’d lose you forever if he loosened his grip even slightly. You don’t know how long the two of you stayed in that position on the floor. But you don’t care if people think two broken souls can’t heal each other. You and him are living proof that sometimes they’re the only ones who can.

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