#the very no-nonsense professionals

[quatregats]

I'm rereading Master and Commander and I'm deeply in danger of just posting every single passage from it ever but I did love the way that the capture of the prize in Chapter 6 was framed on either side by the logbook's entry, and also the way he transitions out of it to set the scene and tone:

Sunday, July 1 … Mustered the ship’s company by divisions read the Articles of War performed Divine Service and committed the body of Henry Gouges to the deep. At noon dº weather. Ditto weather: but the sun sank towards a livid, purple, tumescent cloud-bank piled deep on the western horizon, and it was clear to every seaman aboard that it was not going to remain ditto much longer. The seamen, sprawling abroad on the fo’c’sle and combing out their long hair or plaiting it up again for one another, kindly explained to the landmen that this long swell from the south and east, this strange sticky heat that came both from the sky and the glassy surface of the heaving sea, and this horribly threatening appearance of the sun, meant that there was to be a coming dissolution of all natural bonds, an apocalyptic upheaval, a right dirty night ahead. The sailormen had plenty of time to depress their hearers, already low in their spirits because of the unnatural death of Henry Gouges (had said, ‘Ha, ha, mates, I am fifty years old this day. Oh dear,’ and had died sitting there, still holding his untasted grog) – they had plenty of time, for this was Sunday afternoon, when in the course of nature the fo’c’sle was covered with sailors at their ease, their pigtails undone. Some of the more gifted had queues they could tuck into their belts; and now that these ornaments were loosened and combed out, lank when still wet, or bushy when dry and as yet ungreased, they gave their owners a strangely awful and foreboding look, like oracles; which added to the landmen’s uneasiness.

[...]

Jack leant back against the curved run of the stern-window and let Killick’s version of coffee down by gulps into his grateful stomach; and at the same time that its warmth spread through him, so there ran a lively tide of settled, pure, unfevered happiness – a happiness that another commander (remembering his own first prize) might have discerned from the log-entry, although it was not specifically mentioned there: 1/2 past 10 tacked, 11 in courses, reefed topsail. AM cloudy and rain. 1/2 past 4 chase observed E by S, distance 1/2 mile. Bore up and took possession of dº, which proved to be L’Aimable Louise, French polacre laden with corn and general merchandise for Cette, of about 200 tons, 6 guns and 19 men. Sent her with an officer and eight men to Mahon.

[romaritimeharbor]

the more pantalone lore we get, the clearer it becomes that dottore is most likely the more rational and "sane" one in that business partnership

[oxventurequotes]

johnny: you can move thirty feet

mike: per what

johnny: round

mike: and a round is?

johnny: SIX SECONDS

[thebirdandhersong]

house on fire :)

[laurenttheninth]

*chanting to myself* I will not be offended by clown stereotypes, I will not be offended by clown stereotypes…

[irenespring]

Time for one of my favorite TV traditions, "watch the new episodes of Selling Sunset and argue with the screen like the people can hear me."

[stranded-labyrinth]

sorry i'm slightly livid but less than friendly reminder that if your AO3 Bookmark is public, the author of the fic can see what you wrote in it, and so can everyone else.

if you're for some reason bookmarking a fic you didn't particularly enjoy, just keep it private if you want to leave your negative commentary. everyone has different tastes, nobody needs to know that you didn't like that particular fic, and the author especially doesn't need to hear your griping (or your rating system, for that matter).

it may not be in the comments section, but you've left an equivalent to a hate comment. there's no point in acting like you haven't.

[thatsuncleharrytoyouyoungman]

finishing uni is being forcibly expelled from the world of sweats and suck in to the world of professional wear *gags*

[gcrdy]

GUESS WHO I GOT TO SEE LIVE TONIGHT (fighting for his life doing a totally improv musical)

[thedeadthree]

IOVANNA DAYNE, hotd 🔮 | CALLA TARGARYEN, hotd 🌞

OLGA LITVINCHUCK, tlou⚕️| IRYNA PASTERNAK, tlou 💀

MARTA CHAYKOVSKI, fhr 🕸 | UNA ULLER, hotd 🐍

IRINA RURIK, vtm 🥀 | NYNANE SELWYN, vtm 🩸

TAGGED BY the darlings @morvaris, @leviiackrman, @detectivelokis, @corvosattano, @confidentandgood, @shadowglens, @nightbloodraelle to make the dears in this picrew! ty so much! <3

TAGGING: @risingsh0t, @feystepped, @griffin-wood, @kingsroad, @jendoe, @phillipsgraves, @chuckhansen, @queennymeria, @denerims, @marivenah, @florbelles, @arklay, @unholymilf, @adelaidedrubman, @aartyom, @roofgeese, @nuclearstorms, @noonfaerie, @shellibisshe, @girlbosselrond, @fragilestorm, @yennas, @leondaltons, @malefiicarum, @anoras, @minaharkers, @loriane-elmuerto, @jacobseed and you!

[fortes-fortuna-iogurtum]

feeling very weird about the last two episodes of Miss Scarlet (3.3 and 3.4), because I... actually really loved them?? and I know it was largely because of the absence of William.

which I find odd, because I actually DO like him!! he's a complex and interesting character, he and Eliza's spark off one another is really fun (and also lbr, infuriating, and that's a large reason why this show works; hence the title), and I just... genuinely do like the character. he's irksome as all get-out, he can be entirely insensitive and a touch misogynistic and sometimes I really do wanna break his nose. but I still like him! he has a part to play in this story and I understand that for what it is within the narrative, I really enjoy it!

and yet... I've felt like these last two episodes were some of the most genuinely well-written and especially well-character-written ones for a good while.

I guess it's just because, with the Duke out of the picture, other characters aren't constantly being held up to him in one way or another. Moses, Detective Fitzroy, Mr. Nash, Detective Phelps--they're all given a chance to be developed as characters in their own right, instead of just supporting William/William and Eliza's relationship. and even Eliza grows and is a far more multi-faceted and, I think, genuinely enjoyable character when she's not reduced to simply her reactions to and against William.

I'm intrigued, to be honest. I know he's back in his usual spot as the second lead in the next episode, and I'm looking forward to seeing what happens given the ~revelation~ in the very last scene of episode 3.4... but I'm already kind of sad that the rest of the characters I've so enjoyed getting to spend more time focusing on are going to once again be cast in the shadow of 'Miss Scarlet and the Duke'. despite that literally being the entire point of the show.

[chaoticdelinqueerwithglitter]

Perfect way to explain how stupid is this shit:

They are fucking fictional, the same way I don't go to say to you how freaking boring I found the way you play with your dolls, let me play with mine as if I was Sid from Toy Story. THEY. ARE. FICTIONAL. DOLLS.

(also, honey, the weirdos and the freaks were here before, if you think incest is now appearing in fandom spaces... Hot take: you're the fish outside the water)

The amount of incest, noncon, and pedophilic jjk smut content is getting out of hand.

"Just scroll if you don't like it!" - this doesn't negate the fact they're posting disgusting scenarios. They're targeting an audience of people who should seek therapy. That kind of shit is not okay.

It's like saying "scroll part a zoophile account on Twitter if u don't like it." See how stupid it sounds?

This Fandom is slowly becoming one i regret being in because of just how disgusting people are becoming. Come on guys, do better.

It's okay to have kinks and fetishes, but that doesn't mean they're okay. It's not okay to sexualize minors, it's not okay to sexualizw little space, it's not okay to sexualize r//pe! I get dubcon, but noncon? That's literally just nonconsensual sex.

Anyways. Rant over. Do better, people.

[superfluouskeys]

god FINALLY the end of the term is in sight (actual) (real) (really mean it this time) (no seriously) (:'))

[youareinlove]

I remember travis being pissed off because someone said he was a wide receiver and he was like “i wish i was paid like one”

YUP, i remember his vanity fair interview in the 2022-23 off-season where he was like “yeah sometimes i wonder if i’m being undervalued but i don’t know that i’d get more money if i asked anyway” and the answer has ended up being yes he would

[culxiaa-fn]

Have you played through The Wild Fairy of Erinnyes quest series?

Yes! But the thing is my memory is the same as a gold fish 😞 but i do vaguely remember that Pahsiv is talking about "that visitors" and about he is protecting Fountaine and how he sense the evil presence and how the "visitors" is extremely busy... Since well different languages and all but i read somewhere that the "visitors" name/pronounciation is similar to Neuvillette's name so yeah it's saved to believe that it is Neuvillette himself... And how after the quest finished there are a few friendly Vishaps around Loch Urania... Not to mention Pahsiv herself is a huge possibility of Vishap disguising as Melusines considering it's easier to go around since Melusines is socially acceptable to Fontaine. Although it's not obviously said in game it's probably correct to assume that considering Vishap is very flexible with their shapes and form.

But man... The whole Sovereign and Vishap stuff despite much have been revealed it still has many mysteries... But they probably there to celebrate their lord getting back his authority 😭 "My lord congratulations 🎉🎉"

[starsofang]

Single Dad!Simon who vowed to never trust another woman again after his failed past. He was locked up with the key thrown away, permanently off of the market.

At least that’s what he’d told himself for years. Now, he was beginning to have cold feet.

Simon needed a nanny, one that he could trust completely. He didn’t play about his child, and he’d be damned if he got set up with someone of ill intentions.

But, he was desperate.

Price needed him back periodically, even after his retirement, and he agreed. After all, money was tight when he parented on his own with a growing child.

That was when you came in. Soap had been a pal and recommended an old family friend, somebody he knew Simon could trust with his kid. Simon was skeptical, of course, but Soap had never done him wrong. Reluctantly, he agreed.

Simon wanted to have a trial period to see if you were truly built for the task. He wouldn’t let you off easily. His child was his world, and women weren’t exactly in his deck of cards when it came to trust.

You were as sweet as honey upon the first meeting with a smile that could outdo the sun. Your voice was soft as rain, flowing out of you like a summer song. You spoke to him with the upmost respect, and even more so with his child.

Simon knew he could trust Soap in guaranteeing somebody safe. You were the perfect candidate. He just didn’t know it would lead into him feeling emotions he’d buried a long, long time ago.

Attraction. Interest. A crush, dare he say, like he was a stupid high school kid that just saw the prettiest girl in class and fell head over heels.

He had a silly crush on his child’s nanny when he fully intended to keep it short and professional. That was the way he operated. He was like a working machine, and you had undone his mechanics so easily to the point he struggled to function.

Seeing you with his child only caused his attraction to fester deeper. His child became attached to your hip, smiling more than they had ever done, rambling nonsense to him every time he returned home and you left to go to yours.

It was becoming hard to deny it. You opened an old wound of Simon’s, awakening that deep and dreadful loneliness he felt every passing day. Every smile, every laugh, every Mr. Riley even though you were close in age, all of it had him on the edge of his seat.

He wanted more. He was tired of denying himself happiness. The idea of pushing away every woman was still very vivid in his mind, but denying you just seemed criminal the more time passed.

“I never got to thank you for allowing me in to your home, Mr. Riley,” you told him one day, ever so sweet.

“Thought I told you to call me Simon,” he grunted, avoiding your eyes as the two of you stood in the doorway.

“Right. Simon,” you corrected with a radiant smile. “You have quite the kid, I’ll tell you that. I always look forward to coming over. It makes my day seeing the two of you.”

Simon could feel his heart pattering against his ribcage. His hands were sweaty, and he prayed you didn’t notice him swipe them along his jeans.

“Both of us?” he hummed.

“Of course. You’re just as exciting to see, too, Mr. Ri- Simon.”

Simon’s lips quirked up the slightest bit, but his heart was in his ass. For the first time in a long time, a woman was making him shy and nervous, and it didn’t feel as bad as it did before.

“You’re always free to come over for dinner,” he offered.

“That sounds great, I’d love to have dinner with the two of you!” you exclaimed, beaming.

He didn’t understand how you could be so bright yet so oblivious at the same time.

Simon cleared his throat, shifting uncomfortably on the balls of his feet. “I meant, the two of us.”

You stared at him like he’d grown two heads, and he nearly slammed the door in your face from the sheer anxiety that spiked in him. He couldn’t read your mind or what you were feeling, and Simon wished he had never said anything to begin with.

“That sounds wonderful,” you said instead. Now it was Simon’s turn to stare at you crazy. “I’d love that.”

Simon realized he was staring too long, so he cleared his throat once again, giving you a brief nod and looking away. “Alright. I’ll text you a day and have Soap pick up the little monster for the night.”

When you agreed and left with the smile that made his heart ache, he didn’t waste a second in texting Soap, telling him he’d be on nanny duty for one night that week.

Soap was quick to agree, but not without a little “You’re welcome ;)�� text back.