#the untamed and baking

[glitterlessgold]

Post Timeskip MDZS Sects:

The Jiangs - the adventurous wild child sect, led by a neurotic rule-stickler

The Nies - the hardcore jocks led by a theater kid allergic to exercise

The Jins - the rich snobby kids led by the bastard child of a prostitute everyone mocks

The Lans - the notoriously strict rule-followers led by a man and his younger brother that will break and bend any rule for their beloveds

The Wens - cartoonishly evil sect hunted to almost extinction, with their only two members left some of the most kind and gentle characters in the story.

[strawberrylemonwedge]

headcanon that rather than disobeying the lan clan’s strict sleep schedule like staying up late or waking up late like you might expect of him, Lan Jingyi does rest at hai time and rise at mao time like any Lan but in the most chaotic and inelegant way. Hai time rolls around and he is instantly out, like just nods off in the middle of a conversation while still standing mouth hanging open

the number of times Sizhui has had to move him to his bed in their dorm after Jingyi falls asleep sprawled on the floor, or frantically yank him out of a bath before he drowns, Ouyang Zizhen will catch his head before it falls into his plate of food, Jin Ling ends up having to carry him on his back to the nearest inn when they’re out of town

and yeah he wakes up at mao time but he wakes up like an explosion and is instantly bursting with energy. Before Sizhui can even fully open his eyes, Jingyi is halfway through a monologue at full volume, he’s bouncing off the walls, 75% of his day’s productivity is happening right after he wakes up

bonus points if this very noticeably does Not happen during a serious battle or night hunt and people start to think he’s doing it on purpose but Sizhui will tell you no he’s just Like That

[wangxianficrecs]

cookin' up a storm, piece of cake by livinginaworldofnoise

cookin' up a storm, piece of cake

by livinginaworldofnoise (@gh0st-0f-luke)

G, 9k, Wangxian

Summary: yiling_patriarch: first time making a cake with alcohol! it’s still in the oven but it smells great so far ↳ Gusu Lan Kitchen: There is no alcohol listed in the ingredients for this recipe. yiling_patriarch: i didn’t have any oranges or orange juice so i replaced those with a can of orange sparkling margarita! tasted super weird [★★☆☆☆] ↳ Gusu Lan Kitchen: Are you being deliberately obtuse? OR: life is tough for baker!lwj when online troll!wwx won't stop commenting on his recipe blog Kay's comments: A modern Wangxian love story told through recipes and comments on a recipe blog! Really enjoyed it and the recipes are inspired by actual recipes as well, so you can even try them out yourself. Seeing how Wangxian's relationship developed through comments was really fun and nothing I had seen before! Excerpt: Wei Wuxian, The video you sent, while unnecessary, looks fine, as do the scones you made. I do not wish to receive a sample by mail. Do you have any specific concerns about the recipe you wish to address? Regards, Lan Wangji P.S. As a mechanical engineer, how have you managed to struggle so much with all of my recipes? They are extremely straightforward, especially if you have a basic understanding of science, as you apparently do.

pov third person, modern setting, modern no powers, social media, baking, baker lan wangji, engineer wei wuxian, crack treated seriously, fluff and humor, epistolary, wei wuxian is a little shit, developing relationship, getting together, strangers to lovers

~*~

(Please REBLOG as a signal boost for this hard-working author if you like – or think others might like – this story.)

[eternal-brainrot]

happy birthday to my beloved one and only a-yao!!!! light of my life who deserves all the love and appreciation on his birthday <333

[silverraes]

10 BL Boys I Want Carnally

10 BL Boys That Make Me Feel Things™

(not sexual, not romantic but a secret third thing)

okay so I wasn't exactly tagged in this but I saw several people doing this and I'll take just about any excuse to scream about my favorite characters so I'm just going to very sneakily join in on this trend 👀

there is absolutely no ranking to these bc I couldn't rank them if I wanted to

(also I changed the name a little bc my ace ass is literally physically incapable of wanting anyone carnally but I still have lots of thoughts lmao)

1) Tharn (The Sign)

I mean. is literally anyone surprised that this is where we're starting?

he's the nicest person out there. he can kick your ass if he wants to. he lost his parents at a young age and is absolutely convinced that everyone he loves is doomed to die and he keeps seeing visions of people dying and he's told again and again that those he has wronged in a past life - which he doesn't even remember - are still out to get him and yet he has so much kindness left for the world??

also he can be such a little shit and knows exactly how to tease Phaya back I love him so goddamn much.

(also that mole-)

2) Kim (Kinnporsche)

was he also on my characters I'd hit with my car list? maybe. and what about it.

I love him so much. he's such a badass but he's such a loser. famous singer who falls for a fan he was supposed to be investigating but is too emotionally constipated to admit it. badass son of a mafia family who can kick ass but only if he wants to. who does it like him honestly

(it also helps that he's played by just about the prettiest man alive)

3) Babe (Pit Babe)

did I start watching this show ironically? yes. is every mention of alphas and mpreg and that mama/papa thing hitting me like a brick and causing me 9000 psychic damage every single time? also yes. did I absolutely fall in love with the show and just about every character in it? you bet your fucking ass I did.

but I especially love Babe. he's just so babygirl. special alpha man who has to act tough and strong but just wants to be babied by his dumbass loser (affectionate) alpha boyfriend. like, he's actually so goddamn soft?? I love him.

4) Guy (Bake Me Please)

I think we all knew this was coming. I was literally gushing about him for half of the episodes. Guy my beloved. that show did not deserve you.

he spends the entire show supporting his crush's every decision and trying to make sure he's okay literally how could you not love this man

(yes he was a petty bitch for like 5 minutes there but he immediately apologized for it the next episode. properly. unlike certain other people-)

5) Sprite (Twins)

he's so himbo coded. himbo of all himbos. the himboest. not a brain cell in that head. he's my little dumbass I love him.

he deserves so much better than what he's being put through. someone please just love and support him for who he is. and also take him away from that family

(please talk to your boyfriend tho I am begging)

6) Wei Wuxian (The Untamed)

MY BELOVED. I could write essays about him. he's such a great character I love him so fucking much. if you ever had to bear witness to me talking about him.. I am so sorry.

sassy emo bitch with a flute and a tragic backstory who's seen as evil by just about everyone but only ever had the best intentions. absolute fucking dumbass. kicks ass. always smiling despite the circumstances. loves his siblings so damn much. doomed by the narrative. what more could you possibly ask for

7) Zhou Zishu (Word of Honor)

I'm trying so damn hard to keep this list to one character per show and it really took me a while to decide if I wanted to include him or Wen Kexing but ultimately it was Zhou Zishu for me

just.. god. him. assassin sect leader just trying to retire who keeps getting dragged into the biggest bullshit but doesn't really mind bc the bullshit comes with a mysterious pretty man. also that whole god damn nail thing. I have so many thoughts and feelings about that but this post would get too long if I got started on those-

(also actually pulling the "I'm literally dying" card to get out of chores is so fucking valid of him. more characters should do that)

8) Milk (Choco Milk Shake)

he is quite fucking literally a reincarnated cat, of course I love him. I could list reasons for why I love him but it would be the exact same reasons just about every cat person on earth lists for why they love cats so. but here's a quick summary, just in case:

petty. dramatic. knocks over glasses. silently loves you so fucking much.

9) Tew (My Dear Gangster Oppa)

I really did not expect to love him this much? greenest of green flags (except for the plot line we shall not talk about). can and will kill people and is fine with it (seriously it is so refreshing to see a mafia character not having a huge moral dilemma about being in the mafia). both a badass mafia man and a gamer guy who doesn't know how to talk to people and is absolutely whipped for his gamer bf.

also scars make a person just about 110x more attractive I don't make the rules. even if the scars are weird and yellow, it's the thought that counts.

10) Tian (A Tale of Thousand Stars)

I? love him??

I just love how he sets out to do something for someone he didn't even know because he feels like this person deserves that much at least and how he ends up genuinely loving and caring for those kids and the village and this inner conflict he's having the entire time but hiding oh so well and how he actually calls out his parents on their rich people bs and-

tagging everyone who reads this far and wants to do it. seriously. I mean it. if you want to do this, please go ahead and say I tagged you. I love reading everyone's thoughts.

[inalandofsadclowns]

Can't believe xiyao went through a cottage core phase and it didn't even get a chapter of its own

[wuxianxkexing]

So the cake is done! I can't speak on the taste as of right now since I haven't tried it yet but I'll talk about the process.

I don't think I let the cake cool enough before removing it from the pan so the shape is a bit messed up. It literally fell apart on me so I kind of just pieced it back together and covered it up with frosting. lol The chocolate avocado frosting didn't turn out as smooth as it looked in the recipe I copied, but I bastardized both the cake and the frosting recipes that I used for inspiration so maybe my experimentation is to blame for both of those mishaps. Also I'm not sure if its the mixture of the different types of icing or what but the store bought icing I used for decoration started to bleed, as you can see, so it isn't as pretty as it could've been.

In the middle of the cake is a layer of thinly sliced cinnamon apples topped with cinnamon pumpkin. Does cinnamon go with chocolate cake? No idea but it seemed appropriate to add (to me) so I did. Apple because of Wei Wuxian's donkey Lil' Apple, and pumpkin because his birthday is on Halloween and what is Halloween without pumpkin? The writing is supposed to say Wei Wuxian, but my writing also sucks so if you can't read it or if it isn't quite right sorry about that. lol I did ghost bunnies and ghost fires for the cake (because Wei Wuxian loves bunnies and he likes going on night hunts, also Halloween). The roses were store bought and are just there to look pretty (and maybe symbolize what a simp I am for him but we'll ignore that one). The blueberries were originally going to be used for the ghost bunnies eyes and mouths but they ended up being too big so I just made them hold them instead and used the rest for decoration. I was going to put ghost bunnies all around the side of the cake but I stopped at just those two because the second one looked so horrible. I didn't actually use any proper cake decorating tools/tips so I was limited on what I could feasibly do with the store bought icing I used for decoration.

Anyways I'm a loser and here is Wei Wuxian's birthday cake!

Edit: Taste update! The apple is a no go in my opinion. It just brings too many different flavors into the cake. I recommend sticking with only pumpkin as the filling and then topping it with blueberries. It tastes way better that way. The fake roses, while edible, taste pretty bad. The rest is pretty good!

Another edit: Yup I totally fucked up spelling Wei Wuxian's name. This is how it should look. 无羡. So I didn't mess up terribly bad but it still wasn't quite right. 😔

[justsomeguycore]

i’ve said this before and i’ll say it again until people get it, “aesthetic” isn’t about whether you actually do those things. it’s about looking like you do those things. you’re totally within your rights to think that’s dumb! but something being evocative or representative of an aesthetic has nothing to do with the actual practice or reality or lifestyle

[madtomedgar]

I might redo the book poll without jc and maybe a couple of other sub outs just to see how people vote when he's not there. Determine second place

[waitingforminjae]

okay *adds that to my whiteboard entitled “who the fuck are these ppl in relation to each other and this world”*

[avtrbee]

the prince [2]

✢summary: what happens when your husband brings home a son that is not yours?

✢tags: arranged marriage gojo satoru x reader, reader is a clan kid, she’s v traditional, obvious cat and jon snow references

✢tw: implications of cheating, mentioned abuse, misogyny ig, fanfic gojo, ooc gojo

✢ a/n: here's part 2! i'd like to emphasize that depsite this being a gojo x reader fic, the main realationships i'll be focusing on are y/n and the kids gojo brings home lmao. also im raw dogging the lore as we go so if there are any inconsistencies, please lmk. as always, have fun and lmk what you think!

i don’t do taglists.

part one ✢ masterlist

If it were up to you, you would have shut the gates of the Gojo estate as soon as the child entered the grounds, but your husband had given him the the maids so quickly that you’re sure they have spread the word around already. You could hear the rumors in your head. Gojo Satoru has brought home a child out of wedlock. Gojo Y/N is barren. Gojo Satoru has a mistress.

You expected Gojo to be frantic, stumbling over his words in explanation as to why he has a son- it was his son, there was no doubt about that- reassuring you about his vows remain unbroken, or whatever else but silence. You are silent too as you watch the child get scurried away by the estate staff to scrub the dirt off his face and to get a change of clothes.

Even as he is being escorted away from you, his cursed energy did not fade. You feel it like how everyone feels Gojo’s, but more raw and untamed. Whoever this child is, it is Gojo Satoru reborn again. 

Silence. Silence is what took the Gojo estate into a chokehold as the maids finish bathing the child and then put him in a spare bedroom a good distance away from yours. The maids must think you resent him. 

Satoru pretends like everything is the same as if the boy had been there since the beginning. During the first night, you watch with a blank face as the cake you've baked for him is eaten by the child. Neither the boy nor Satoru expresses their gratitude towards you. You doubt they even know you baked it.

To his credit, Satoru had treated the child better than you had expected. He is blossoming into fatherhood, you realize and you feel the rage and anger burn in your stomach.

He pats the boy's head and messes his hair, before pointing to his own messy mane exclaiming, "See? We match!"

Satoru had tried to include you in conversations with the boy, even daring to seat him on his right at meals. Satoru would blab after seeing the child gobble mochi. "Mochi is Y/N's favorite too!" He turns to look at you with a bright smile. "Right, Y/N?"

You want to point out that the boy had gobbled everything served to him, but you just give a brief nod.

At night, you sleep like a log- rigid, straight, and quiet. Satoru, on the other hand, remains comfortable, snoozing the day's exhaustion behind him.

Tonight will be the same as it has been for the past few weeks. You stare at yourself in the mirror of your vanity, wondering if your reflection is the perfect example of a foolish woman. How stupid of you to think he was different.

There was nothing but quiet as you prepare yourself to sleep, brushing your hair quietly. You hear the door creak but you do not turn and greet him with a smile like you used to.

“I expected you to be more emotional about this,” came Satoru's words beside you. Me too, you want to reply but held your mouth shut.

You had expected yourself to scream, and let your anger flow through your voice. You wanted to cry until your tears were dry and there wasn't any left. Neither you nor Satoru would be surprised if you use your technique against him in a fit of fury, and if you truly knew your husband, you know he'd take your anger like it was penance. You want to be the fire that burns him badly. But you did none of those.

You are as cold as their blue eyes. You are quiet.

You continue to brush your hair.

"Do you want me to get rid of him?" offers Satoru. "Just say the word, and I will."

You blink in surprise. You meet his eyes in the mirror. Satoru looks nonchalant in his posture with his hands in his pockets. But the fact that his glasses were nowhere to be seen tells you he is not joking.

Your ears recall the promise he made months ago. My wife, my equal. A promise to try, to try to be happy to spite everyone who was determined to make your lives miserable. 

The sudden exhaustion hit you, your shoulders slumping from your previous postures. You lean back, letting your nape rest on the back of the chair. You stare at the ceiling, your head forbidding you to forget how the child looked like. White hair. Blue eyes. You hear Satoru sigh somewhere near you. You hear his footsteps come. From your peripheral, you see his figure beside you. A feather-like hesitant hand touches your shoulder. “I was not unfaithful to you.”

Satoru moves to kneel in front of your sitting figure. He reaches out to your head, and touches his forehead against yours. You find yourself looking up at his eyes, the same shade of eyes that he shares with the child. His hands cradle your face, desperate for you to believe him. “Please. Please, Y/N.”

You remain silent. 

“You’re the only one I have left, Y/N, please.” He begs. There are tears threatening to spill down to his pretty face, and you find some sick satisfaction in them.

That is not true. Your husband has his clan, his estate servants, his high school friends, and his teachers. It is you that has no one but him. By your culture’s traditions, you do not belong to your clan anymore. You know that some elders have begun to doubt their choice in choosing you as the wife of Gojo Satoru with the obvious lack of children, but with the sudden appearance of Gojo-sama’s bastard child, they might annul your marriage by force- or, god forbid, cast you aside for another, more fertile woman.

You do not wish to share your thoughts, but your husband grips your head so desperately. You have made a god beg.

“I know.” You say. The child may be young, but he was old enough to walk and talk small phrases on his own. He must be at least two years old. The child is older than your marriage.

His shoulders immediately drop in relief before quickly detangling himself from you and wrapping his arms around your waist. He slides his head to hide in your neck and like instinct, you welcome him wrapping your hands around his waist.

"Where would you leave him?" You manage to ask, still not believing his offer.

"The cabin," he says. You can see the cracks on your husband now. You spot his hand making a fist inside his pockets, like it pains him to speak. “The one by Nagasaki, remember? I’ll send a maid and give him money every month. We can send him right now. The maids will not say anything outside the estate, not if I threaten to chop their tongues off. We can send him off with a caretaker to a cabin somewhere and leave him there. I- I can visit him a few times a year- just to make sure he’s fine.”

You blink. You did not expect Satoru to offer that. You let the fantasy linger in your head. You imagine the boy’s life so far- abandoned by his mother and unknown by his father. Children do not understand things the way older people do, so it is up to the adults to help and explain certain things. But he has not had an adult in his life before. Would you be happy if you were left alone in the cabin in the middle of the woods with no one but a caretaker for company? Better yet- will the caretaker even stay to care for him without anyone around?

That sounds incredibly lonely, you realize. The premise sounds all too familiar to you- an empty house with no one but servants. But this boy will only get one.

He needs people to protect him, but you are unsure if you’d like to. Your instincts tell you to agree, get rid of the boy before he becomes more of a threat.

“Satoru,” you say slowly, thinking of your next words carefully. “He is just child. He is no danger to me.”

You hold your breath, suprised to hear the words out of your mouth. From your lap, Satoru holds your gaze- piercing eyes trying to read your mind. If he caught your lie he does not show it.

"Are you sure?"

No. "Yes."

-

Hiroki. Satoru had names him Gojo Hiroki.

He spends most of his days inside the estate surrounded by maids or inside his room playing with the toys you off-handedly ordered the day after he arrived. The maids gush about him already, the older ones excitedly murmuring how the little lord acts so much like your husband as a child. You would be a fool not to agree.

Hiroki runs barefoot through the estate, tracking mud on precious tatami floors before a servant finally catches him. He likes people, likes the maids and the servants, and thus has migrated to the kitchen a few weeks after his arrival like he was addicted to places were people are the most. He draws. He draws so much it’s almost ridiculous. You could have a library full of childish scribbles.

Like your husband, he devours his dessert the best before any dish. He eats mochi, ice cream, cookies and whatever sweets there are on the table like it was his last meal. You recall one of the maids gasp as a drop of cream lands on your cheek when he slammed his fork in his cake. 

Satoru is free in his affection for the boy, unexpectedly flourishing in fatherhood. He remains firm in his belief that children should be children and makes an effort to see Hiroki out. Satoru becomes known to sneak the child away from the estate to parks, to mini-vacations you begrudgingly join after Satoru’s incessant pestering. And of course- school. Hiroki made history once again when Satoru announced his decision to enroll Hiroki in a totally normal, public Japanese preschool.

You realize that Satoru was meant to be a father. And one good one at that. It brings you comfort that any children that he is at least good to his son after he confessed his plan to be a teacher after graduation.

Tokyo’s jujutsu highschool would be blessed with his presence, thought one of Satoru’s female seniors would disagree.

“Yo, Y/N-chan,” came a voice.

You twist your body over to the source of the voice, and your face lights up at the sight of a familiar face. “Getou-san!”

If Satoru's presence is an overwhelming force, making everyone and everything bow to him as if he is god, Getou is a dark, uneasy, slinking feeling. His cat-like features morph into a happy expression with a polite smile on his lips.

“Is there a mission today?” You ask as Getou comes nearer. Satoru would try his best to keep any of his classmates away from his estate, but there is nothing he can hide from Getou and Shoko. "Can I come?"

After you had let slip that you wanted to become a licensed sorcerer, Satoru had made it a habit to sneak you into some missions with Getou. You had fretted about the technical legalities and questioned the safety of the public when an inexperienced sorcerer like you enter the battlefield but Satoru merely shrugged and simply gestured to his best friend. We're the strongest!

Getou leans his shoulder on the wall. "Nope, not this one Y/N."

“I see,” you say, failing to hide your disappointment. Sometimes you wonder why you enjoy the missions so much. Was it the thrill of doing something you never would? Perhaps it was the freedom of it all, unleashing your power to poor curses who quiver beneath your feet?

Your ears perked at a familiar high pitched laugh, and your eyes immediately lock to the window where Hiroki soon runs across. He has dried soil on his feet. His pale hair is slicked back with sweat and it glistens against the sun like snow.

A maid forces a laugh in panic as she tries to catch him with his shoes on one hand.

Away from him. That’s why you enjoy it.

Getou follows your line of sight. “How is he?”

You glare at him. “How would I know?”

Everyone knows that Hiroki is a taboo topic if it’s within your earshot, lest they want the you in a foul mood. But Getou does not shy away from his question and only raises an eyebrow, calling your bluff.

“You’re telling me you do not know your own household?”

“The garden is his place,” you sigh., and admitting it felt like defeat. “He likes the grass on his feet and likes big spaces. He gets angsty when a room is too small.”

“Mmhm,” Getou agrees. “Did you know Satoru plans to enroll him in a daycare?”

Your eyes widen in horror. “In a- what?” You shriek. “He has a dozen of servants here willing to serve him-! Does he even realize the risk he’s putting the boy in? Assassins, curses, cursed users…” you trail off, remembering your own childhood. It was strange to be surrounded by servants but feeling so alone at the same time. “I see.” A daycare meant potential friends, friends that you never got to have. “Does…does the boy like it at least?”

“Me?” Getou barks out a surprised laugh. “Shouldn’t you know that?”

You glare at him. Getou meets your gaze unapologetically, almost as if he was challenging you. Finally, he sighs. “Have you ever talked to him at least?”

You roll your eyes. Your sharp tone echoes around the room. “And why would I do that? He is no concern to me.”

"He needs you."

"He does not need me," you snap, suddenly impatient for Satoru to come out of wherever he’s hiding so Getou and him can go. “He will resent me when he’s older, I know it.”

You have seen this same scene over and over again. Children and the wife of the husband do not get along. Both suffer at the existence of the other. This is the fate that Satoru had subjected you to. This is the fate you have set upon yourself when you refused to send him away. You wonder if your kindness will cost you one day.

“Well,” Getou shrugged nonchalantly. “You haven’t given him any reason to like you either.”

You opened your mouth to retort, only to be interrupted by Satoru.

“Getouu,” he whined, comically trudging towards his best friend with a hunched back. “Why are you so early?”

You see Getou open his mouth to reply, but you are lost in your head. You watch Getou ignore Satoru’s childish gimmicks, already dragging him out of the room and towards the door. You feel Satoru kiss your cheek before waving goodbye, but your head was in a daze mindlessly repeating Getou’s words. You feel shiver creep down your spine before shifting your gaze towards the garden where Hiroki’s presence was last.

-

thank you so much for reading guys! i’d love to hear all criticisms and suggestions for this universe <33 please lmk through comments :>

here’s my masterlist

[winged-scribe]

Twilight Bonds

tws : primal play, power dynamic, knotting, breeding kink if you squint, mirror sex.

fem!reader x tp!Link - commission by anonymous

wc : 3.4 k

It was in the quaint village of Ordon where our tale unfolds, under the watchful gaze of the setting sun, painting the sky in hues of fiery passion and serene peace.

[Name], a maiden with eyes reflecting the depth of the twilight, and a spirit as untamed as the wind, was a wanderer at heart. Her journey had brought her to Ordon, a village that seemed to exist in a space where time flowed gently. She entered the village, excited for the new sights and people she would meet.

As [Name] eagerly walked through the village, she took note of her surroundings; Ordon Village was a tapestry of pastoral beauty, nestled in the embrace of nature’s undisturbed splendor. The cottages, with their thatched roofs and walls of warm, sun-baked clay, huddled together like old friends sharing secrets. Smoke curled lazily from chimneys, carrying with it the scent of freshly baked bread and the earthly aroma of burning wood. Their gardens bloomed with a riot of colors, from the fiery reds of geraniums to the delicate blues of forget-me-nots, each petal a testament to the villagers’ harmony with the land.

Keen to become a part of this idyllic setting, she approached some villagers with a smile. However, the response she received was far from the kind embrace she had envisioned. The villagers, bound by the tight-knit fabric of their long-standing relationships, viewed her as an outsider. Their greetings were curt, smiles forced, and their conversations ended almost as quickly as they began. She attempted to engage with them, complimenting their lovely village, asking about their traditions, and expressing a genuine interest in their ways of life. But [Name]’s efforts were met with cold shoulders and suspicious glances.

Whispers followed her and doors closed upon her approach as she walked through the main street back to her inn. She couldn't understand the cause of their aversion. Was it her unfamiliar accent? Her different attire? The rejection from the locals weighed heavily on her mind, the village’s frigid demeanor a stark contrast to the warmth of the hearth that greeted her as she entered her room. It was a small, cozy area, with walls adorned with woven tapestries. A sturdy wooden bed, covered with a quilt of patchwork colors, beckoned [Name] to rest, while a side table by the window held a basin and pitcher for washing away the day’s weariness. Across from the bed, a large mirror took the pride of the place. Its frame was a work of art, the wood polished to a shine, reflecting the craftsmanship of the village’s artisans.

She moved to the window, pushing it open to let in the cool evening breeze. The once lively village had begun to fade into a hushed lullaby. [Name] found herself gazing at the setting sun, stars slowly appearing across the night sky.

With a sigh, she turned away from the window and lit a small candle, its flickering flame casting dancing shadows throughout the room.

She sat at the edge of the bed, her hands idly tracing the patterns on the quilt. The fabric told stories of harvests and festivals, of a community woven together by shared joys and sorrows.

In an attempt to distract herself from the cold sting of rejection, she decided to take refuge in the one thing that brought her consolation–a walk. The open air should clear her mind. She stepped out of the Inn, the wooden door closing softly behind her, and ventured into the twilight. The village was completely quiet now, only the soft chirps of crickets filled the silence of daily life retreated into the privacy of homes and hearths. [Name] wrapped her shawl tighter around her shoulders, the fabric a small comfort against the crisp evening air.

The path before her wound through the village and out into the fields beyond, where the land stretched out like a canvas waiting for the night's brush. The sky, a mosaic of deepening blues and purples, was the first to welcome her, the stars beginning to twinkle like shy eyes opening to the night. Her footsteps were silent on the soft earth, the only sound being the gentle rustling of leaves and the distant call of a nightingale. The beauty of Ordon, untouched by the shadows of Ganon, enveloped her in its serene arms. Here, among the whispering grasses and watchful trees, [Name] found a peace that the village had all but denied her.

As she continued the path, her thoughts drifted like the clouds above. She pondered the walls people build around their hearts, the fear of the unknown and difference that drives them to shun what they do not understand. Yet, she felt a kinship with the world around her–a world that asked for no explanations, that accepted her presence without question.

[Name] stops abruptly, a new sound gracing her ears–a sound that seemed both foreign and familiar. It was a flute, she realized. Its notes floating through the air with a poignant beauty that tugged at her heartstrings. The melody was haunting, filled with longing and a touch of sorrow, yet it carried a strength that spoke of hope and courage. Drawn by the music, [Name] followed the sound, her steps light, as if she were being pulled by an invisible thread.

The melody led her to the spring, a place where the water mirrored the sky’s twilight canvas. Slowly peeking from the brush, she saw him for the first time–Link, the village’s guardian, his fingers moving expertly over the instrument, his eyes closed as if in communion with the song he played.

He hadn’t noticed her, too immersed in his music, he continued playing. [Name] approached quietly, not wanting to interrupt the magic of the moment. As she drew closer, the music enveloped her, wrapping around her like a warm embrace. She stood there listening until the final note drifted into the evening air and silence fell.

It was then that Link opened his eyes, a sense of tranquility surrounding him. Tranquility gave way to surprise when his gaze fell upon [Name], who stood at the edge of the spring, her figure bathed in the twilight's last embrace. For a fleeting moment, their eyes locked and a myriad of unspoken words passed between them. [Name]’s heart raced. A sudden fear gripping her–a fear of the unknown, of the intensity she saw reflected in Link's eyes. It was as if he could see into the very depths of her soul, and the vulnerability of that connection was overwhelming.

With a sharp intake of breath, she turned on her heel and fled, her footsteps a hurried whisper against the soft earth. Link’s hand instinctively reached out, a silent plea for her to stay, to understand that whatever just happened was to be cherished, not feared. But as she disappeared into the veil of night, Link remained still, the wisdom of his heart telling him to resist the urge to chase after her. He understood that some bonds, like the rarest of flowers, needed space to bloom. He stood there, the longing etched in his stance, a silent vow forming in his spirit to wait for her, to give her the time she needed to understand the depth of their connection.

Trees become a haze as [Name] runs through the underbrush. Her heart pounded like the drums of a frenzied dance as she re-entered the village, her breath coming in short, sharp gasps. The cool night air whipped against her face, tangling her hair into wild tendrils that whirled in the wind's chaotic rhythm. The cobblestone beneath her feet was a blur, each step propelling her further away from the spring, from Link, and from the intense heat his gaze gave her.

She reached the inn, a sanctuary of wood and stone, its windows glowing with the promise of solitude. With trembling hands, she pushed open the door, the silence a much needed relief from the pounding of her heart. [Name] made her way to her room, thoughts in disarray, each step she took felt heavier than the last.

Once she entered her room, she leaned back against the door, closing her eyes as she tried to steady her breathing. She moved to the window, her hands gripping the sill as she gazed out into the night. Thoughts of Link invaded her mind, unbidden yet persistent. She remembered the way his music had stirred something deep within her, a longing she couldn't quite name. His presence had been a balm to her loneliness, his melody a thread weaving through the emptiness she had felt since arriving in Ordon. But [Name] couldn’t deny she was drawn to the mystifying figure known as Link.

[Name] moved to the bed. As she sat at the edge, the softness of the mattress contrasted sharply with the turmoil within her. The room, bathed in the gentle glow of the candle, seemed to hold her in a tender embrace, a silent witness to the storm in her soul.

Her thoughts returned to Link. The memory of his eyes, deep and fathomless, lingered in her mind, a haunting presence that she could neither embrace nor escape. The melody of his flute, a poignant echo of their brief encounter, played over in her head–a symphony of what-ifs and maybes.

As sleep’s gentle vines began to weave their way around [Name]’s consciousness, her last thoughts were of him. She imagined his strong hands deftly coaxing music from the flute, his focused gaze as he poured his soul into the notes.

For the next four nights, as if drawn by an unseen force, [Name] found herself at the spring. Hidden in the shadows, she watched Link play his flute, each tune a new story told in the language of music. The melodies were varied–some joyful, some melancholic, but all of them touched by the magic of twilight.

She stayed only long enough to commit the music to memory, slipping away like a wraith before the final notes faded. Each retreat was a battle between her desire to stay and the fear of discovery. Yet, with each passing night, the music wove a stronger spell, and her heart grew ever more entwined with the enigmatic guardian of Ordon Village.

On the fifth night, under the cloak of darkness, [Name] once again found herself drawn to the spring. The melody of Link’s flute filled the air, a haunting tune that seemed to speak of longing and unfulfilled desires. She nestled into her usual hiding spot, her presence masked by the shadows.

The night was still, the only sound was the music and the occasional hoot of an owl. But fate, it seemed, had other plans. A stray twig lay hidden beneath the blanket of fallen leaves, and as she shifted her weight, it snapped—a sharp, betraying sound that shattered the silence.

Link’s music ceased abruptly, and their eyes met across the moonlit clearing. Time seemed to stand still, the world holding its breath. [Name] couldn’t seem to move, even as Link strode towards her. The air thickened around her, clinging to her skin like a damp shroud. Her heart raced, like a wild stallion was galloping through her chest.

Link’s eyes were dark and half-lidded with desire, something starved and primal seemingly stripping [Name] down where she stood, tracing over every feature of hers. His stature seemed larger, and more frightening up close. The moonlight painted his features in stark relief–the sharp angles of his jaw, the taut line of his lips. Shadows clung to him like a second skin, and [Name] wondered if this was the same man she had been sneakily listening to.

“Why do you keep running?” Link’s voice startles you–seeming low and strained. It was a low growl, a primal rumble that echoed through the spring.

She tried to speak, but her tongue felt heavy, and uncooperative. The world tilted, and she swayed, dizzy with conflicting emotions. Fear and desire warred within her, a typhoon threatening to consume her being.

“Link,” [Name] whispered, her voice barely audible. “I don’t-”

He took a step closer to [Name]. His scent—a heady mix of pine and musk—wrapped around her, intoxicating and dangerous. [Name] backed away, her mind a whirlwind of confusion. He cups his hand against her face, idly tracing his thumb over her cheek.

Link leans in, his lips ghosting over the shell of [Name]’s ear, having to forcibly hold himself back from pouncing on her right at this moment as she shivers from the contact. She finally stands in front of him, finally within his grasp and his for the taking.

“Run,” he whispers lowly. [Name] looks up at the man towering over her, eyes becoming wide and doe-like. A growl rumbles from his throat. “But if I catch ya,” he drawls, his lips slowly moving downwards, teasing the skin of her neck. Link stops and hovers over her pulse, mouth watering over her scent. “I'll take you.”

Heat flooded [Name’s] core, arousal leaking through the fear and unease. Their eyes lock, unspoken words exchanged between the two of them as Link begins to count backwards from five.

“Five.” Would she make it back in time?

“Four.” How long would the chase last?

“Three.” Would her room at the inn be the safe spot?

“Two.” What did Link plan to do once he caught her?

“One.” Then, the spell broke, and [Name] turned and fled, her heart thundering in her chest.

This time, however, Link’s instincts took over. He could no longer be the silent observer, his feet moving before his mind had time to protest. He gave chase, his form a blur of motion, driven by a force he couldn’t name.

They raced through the village, [Name]’s breath coming in ragged gasps, Link’s footsteps a relentless echo behind her. The night air was a rush of adrenaline, the village a maze of shadows and light.

She reached the inn, her sanctuary, and with a desperate surge of strength, she burst into her room. She barely had a moment to catch her breath when she saw him—Link, framed by the window, his silhouette a testament to his otherworldly agility.

There was an intensity in his gaze, a silent question that hung in the air between them as they stood unmoving. [Name]’s eyes were wide and frightened, the hairs on the back of her neck standing on end as Link’s hungry gaze trailed the frame of her body, fully taking her in. Link stalks toward her, tightly snaking his arms around [Name]’s midsection as his lips brush against the cusp of her ear.

“Caught ya.” He murmurs, voice deep and husky with thinly veiled desire.

Link pushes her against the door, eager to claim what the Goddesses had gifted him. He trails his lips against [Name]’s neck, kissing and sucking whatever he could reach. [Name] couldn’t stop the noises that fell from her mouth, Link seeming to know exactly where to direct his onslaught of frenzied affection.

Their breath mingled in the air, a symphony of gasps and moans filling the room as they surrendered to the intoxicating pull of their bodies. Link's hands roamed over her curves, igniting a fire within her that burned brighter with each touch, each kiss, each whispered promise of ecstasy.

Link slots his knee between [Name]’s thighs, pressing against her core as his fingertips dig harshly into the plush flesh of her hips. His hands rock her into his thigh, setting the pace agonizingly slow. Link groans into her lips, his cock throbbing in time with her moans, and he finds that he is unable to wait any longer.

He lowers himself to the floor, his fingers hooking around the hem of her waistband— tugging her bottoms off and tossing it to the side. Link’s breath fans across her clothed heat, his nose bumping into her clit as he desperately laps at the fabric. He seemed as if he were a starving man, and they hastily tear the remaining clothing from their bodies, exposing their unmarked skin to the moonlight.

His breathing grows ragged, his chest rapidly rising and falling as one hand reaches up to cup her breast, and the other tenderly pushing a digit into her as his lips latch back onto her bundle of nerves. Link’s eyes roll back at the taste, his fingers slowly pumping in time with each roll of his tongue on her clit.

[Name] gasps at the welcome intrusion, fisting Link’s hair to bring him closer. He moans at the pain and adds another digit that causes her to spasm with pleasure. He suddenly stops his abuse, and looks up at [Name] from beneath his lashes, eyes half-lidded with a ravenous, instinctual hunger.

“Why did you-“ [Name] begins to question. But Link cuts her off by picking her up and taking her in front of the mirror. Her face flushes with embarrassment as she meets their reflections, her core clenching around nothing. Her eyes connect with Link’s pulsing length, widening as she realized he was indeed not like other Hyrulian men.

His cock was flushed a pretty pink, the base plump with arousal, and the head a thick bulb. [Name] begins to panic, how would that ever fit inside her? Link notices her anxiety and sloppily trails kisses along her neck in an attempt to soothe her.

“Don’t worry, lil’ bunny. I’ll go nice n’ easy on ya.” Link purrs, chuckling darkly. He aligns himself with [Name]’s entrance, swiping his cockhead along her folds - leaving a silvery string of arousal connecting them.

“Look atcha, Bunny…you’re drooling f’me. Can’t handle a little heavy petting?” Link all but groans, slowly sinking into her gummy walls. [Name] clenched around his cock like a vice, a soft whine leaving her lips that nearly snapped Link’s remaining patience. His jaw slackens as his fingers wrap around [Name]’s jaw, forcing her to watch as he slowly thrusts into her.

“Be a good girl and watch me make a mess of ya, Bunny,” he murmurs in her ear. “If you don’t, I’ll stop.”

Once she was accustomed to his size, her soft whines rising in volume, Link increases his pace. His hips snap into her, breathy groans parting his lips as his knot begins to swell. Their gazes meet in the mirror’s reflection, tears bubbling in [Name’s] half-lidded eyes as he gains speed.

“Doin’ so good for me, bunny.” Link praises, his breath growing heavy as he begins to lose himself to the feeling, his thrusts growing sloppy. [Name] whines in response, her walls pulsing and fluttering around Link’s swollen knot.

“Not yet, bunny. Gotta cum with me.” He growls, his fingers finding purchase on her hips, digging harshly into the skin. His knot throbs inside of [Name], low groans and whines filling the open space as the two grow closer to their climax. Each thrust becomes harder, faster, a cacophony of lewd squelching and sounds of ecstasy.

“Nngh.. I’m close, bunny… a little more and i’ll fuck you full of my cum, yeah? You’ll be good and take it f’me, won’t you, bunny?” Link growls.

[Name]’s mind is spinning with pleasure, melting into a soft mush. Her stomach tightens at Link’s words, her body growing hotter as she watches the man rut into her. “Link… I can’t-“

“Yes, you can. You’ll hold it f’me, okay? Such a good girl takin’ my cock like this.” Link rasps between quick breaths. His praise alone makes her tighten in pleasure. “Fuck, bunny… I’m gonna cum..!”

“Cum with me..! Cum with me, bunny-“ Link moans through gulps of air, his knot locking inside her gummy walls as he weakly fucks [Name] through their shared orgasm. Hot ropes of cum spill into her womb, her body trembling as her orgasm washes over her. Tears spill down her cheeks from the sheer intensity.

Link bites down on the apex of [Name]’s shoulder to muffle his sounds of pleasure, a pained whine erupting from the woman. Even after their orgasms have passed, Link slowly continues rutting into her, instincts demanding that he doesn’t waste a drop. He presses a tender kiss to her pulse after some time, inhaling the aroma of her natural pheromones and gently pulls out of her.

“You did so good for me, bunny.” Link murmurs softly, padding off to the bathroom to find something to clean her up. When he returns, he carefully cleans [Name] up and slides into bed with her - an arm draped over her waist as he pulls her close to him.

“You don’t have to run anymore, [Name].”

[fanaticsnail]

Hi Snail!! It's been a little while, I hope you and the family are doing well! I thought I'd pop in with so self-indulgent birthday thoughts I've had throughout the day.

1. Mihawk with a happy trail. (No other thoughts, but pretty man I'd desire to bite all over.)

2. Baking a birthday cake with Sanji! initially, he was going to have it be a surprise, but after catching him, we both worked on it together. (More platonic leaning vibes, he'd be such a nice friendo)

3. Shanks accidentally starting a citywide party in celebration of my birthday (he gets excited at the thought of a party), but ends up leading me off to just spend time alone on some isolated hilltop. It's a very peaceful evening shared between us.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY WRENNYX!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAA. Please have a mini fic on your special day for the broody swordsman 🖤. I'm sorry I didn't write more, my love!

Happy Trail

Masterlist Here

Word Count: mini fic

Synopsis: Mihawk is not as well groomed as he usually keeps himself. You notice, and you can't help yourself.

Themes: Mihawk x f!reader, established relationship, suggestive content, Mihawk is unkept, husband x wife, domesticity.

Mihawk, arching his brow as perplexion dawns on his face as you lower yourself to the ground beside his thighs. Leaning back on the chair, unlacing his knee from its position atop the other, he raises his wineglass to his lips. Eyes never leaving yours, he watches as you eagerly crawl between his knees and place your hands splayed atop both of his muscular and lanky legs.

"My dear," he utters when releasing the lip of the wine glass from his open mouth, tongue darting out to collect the spillover from his bottom lip, "Just what do you think you are doing?"

You hum gently, moving your thumbs on soothing circles to the apex of his lowered hemline. Adonis belt on full view, you gently caress your digits over the short patch of silky, dark locks and shudder in delight at the sensation.

"You're not as groomed as you usually keep yourself, my darling," you note, gently flicking over the follicles, "I am not complaining."

Mihawk shuddered away from your touch, the ministrations tickling at his abdomen causing a slight twitch to his lips and a smile reserved only for you in its wake.

"Oh, really?" he feigned indifference, his body reacting against his will as he leaned into your touch, "You are not complaining?"

Reaching forward, he placed the wine glass down on the table in front of him, all the while holding your eyes with his honey-hued orbs. Leaning down, he collected your chin within his right hand and rose you to stand. As you rose to your feet, he gently guided your right hip with his left hand and urged you forward to straddle his waist.

"You're telling me," he gently hooked your hair over your ear and caressed your jawline gently, "You, my beautiful wife," he pressed his lips to your cheek, "Enjoy having a partially scruffy husband?"

Mihawk smiled against your cheek, pressing a further three kisses slowly against your cheek towards your neck. His moustache and beard tickled your face, prompting you to curl in to his soft touch.

"Careful now," he whispered, his lips finally catching that place on your neck below your earlobe that had a soft gasp fled your lips, "I might think you prefer me a little untamed, beloved."

"Mihawk," you gasped, your chest rising with the bloom of need in your chest and stomach. He chuckled against your neck, gently clamping his teeth down on your pulse and soothing it with his tongue.

"Upstairs, dear," he chuckled against your skin, his wandering hands gently caressing your knuckles as you continued to toy with his treasure trove of dark curls, "Let me show you just how wild and unbridled your husband can truly be for you."

Tag list: @mfreedomstuff @daydreamer-in-training @since-im-already-here @gingernut1314 @writingmysanity @i-am-vita @indydonuts @feral-artistry @the-light-of-star @empirenowmp3 @racfoam @sunflowersatori @carrotsunshine @skullfacedlady @jintaka-hane @thenotsofantasticlifestory

[getsteddiewithit]

Two People

——

just thinking about how steve and eddie would be the same people- just on opposite sides of the spectrum.

eddie would be so pale year-round, including during the summer on beach trips. he did not like exercising or being outside. and when he would join steve with being outside, he would be burnt to a crisp.

steve would be gorgeously tan, playing in the waves and the sand like a toddler. out there every day until the day they had to leave. he’s incredibly athletic and loves to move around. he would force eddie to go outside with him and he would be stuck applying aloe all over eddie’s back, but he wouldnt mind.

eddie likes his coffee ridiculously sweet- extra cream, flavoring, and sugar every time.

steve likes americanos- which eddie thinks is fucking disgusting.

but they both like an extra shot of espresso.

steve’s hair grows incredibly fast. one year in middle school, he went a whole summer without cutting it; his hair long and straight. he cut it off and has kept it short-ish since.

eddie’s hair grows slow. it’s untamed and curly and he will never, ever cut it. steve doesn’t want him to.

eddie is very sensitive and gets mad or frustrated easily, and it’s easy to get him worked up.

steve is cool and calm under any pressure, and it’s hard to make him mad. but he’s great at reading people, and knows how to calm eddie down quick.

eddie is loaded with piercings and tattoos and is completely fine with needles.

steve hates needles and will never get pierced or tattooed- with the exception of getting a matching tattoo with eddie in the future. eddie will have to hold his hand the entire time.

eddie is amused very easily, and steve does the joking and messing around.

steve’s body is covered in freckles and moles; it reminds eddie of constellations.

eddie’s skin would be completely bare if it weren’t for the multiple tattoos he has.

eddie loves rainy days and storms.

steve is afraid of thunder and loves the sun.

steve kills the bugs when they find some.

eddie is the one jumping to get away from them.

eddie is cold easily, steve is hot easily. they keep the thermostat at 67, no matter what. and both of them will get mad if the other decides to change it without talking about it first. (yes, they do have a whole discussion before changing the thermostat.)

eddie loves to bake.

steve loves to cook. (yes, there is a big difference.)

despite his appearance, eddie is not a big fan of horror movies.

steve is a huge horror movie buff.

these two- no matter how long they’ve been dating- can NOT take a shower together because eddie likes it burning hot and steve has to keep it cool.

these are all i have. i love them sm. thank you for reading. :)

[pumpkinpaix]

Chapter Spotlight 3:

"A Full Account: Queer Structures and Narrative Democratization in Mo Dao Zu Shi" by Andrea Acosta and Lillian Lu

Did researching/writing your chapter change how you saw the text, the fandom, or the media? How so?

This is less a change on how we saw the text, fandom, or media and more on how we view academia and academic work. For each of us, this was a first experience in co-authoring a critical essay with another person—beyond it being a productive (and joyful) experience for us, we also really appreciated the way it moved us away from the so-called "cult of individual genius" that dominates academia and toward something more honest, collaborative, and relational in our respective scholarly practices.

If there’s one thing you hope the fandom takes away from your article, what would it be?

Against the fandom urge to "pin down" the text, we want to highlight how queer, unsettled, and plurivocal the novel is—and how much more interesting and beautiful it is because of its form! The ethos of Wangxian is baked into the novel's queer and potentially revolutionary structure.

What is your MDZS/CQL origin story? (i.e. how did you come to this text?)

One night in 2019 (before The Untamed was released but after the donghua had come out), Andrea held Lilly captive for two hours so that she could show her a self-made PowerPoint about the series. Later, we experienced the release of The Untamed together and never looked back.

Favorite adaptation, if any?

For Lilly, the audio drama. For Andrea, a Frankenstein-ed mix of season 1 of the donghua and The Untamed in its entirety.

Who's your favorite character?

In true compatible fashion, Lilly's favorite character is Lan Wangji, and Andrea's is Wei Wuxian.

How did this chapter come about, especially as a co-authored production?

The chapter and its sections (imperfectly parsed and intentionally uneven) carry with them all the ephemera of the conversations that produced them: the late-night conversations from our apartments during the 2020 lockdown, the Zoom conversations held in different states during the winter holidays, and the sunnier days we worked together in cafés on Wednesday mornings. Our chapter mirrors these small affective, relational, and quotidian moments that make acts of academic writing not just possible but desirable. Writing this chapter has been, in short, a labor of love.

You can find Andrea and Lillian on Twitter/X @a_priyd and @lillyluwrites.

(FAQ) (all posts on Catching Chen Qing Ling)

[silverraes]

10 BL Characters I Would Hit With My Car

big thank you to @buddhamethods for starting this. I thought it sounded like a fun idea and just had to participate because I have Opinions™ :)

I am hitting some of these characters with only the best intentions and some of them out of pure spite

1) Shin (Bake Me Please)

if you've seen me post about this show or if you've seen it yourself, you know exactly why this guy is on here and also why he's the main reason why I just had to join in on this trend

square up, Shin, I'm hitting you with my car for all that bs and also to help with your character development a little <3

(I didn't find a fitting gif so have a pic as a great summary for why he's on here instead)

2) Way (Pit Babe)

listen I love him. after all if evil why pretty? but he's also a b*tch and he deserves to get hit by a car a little. as a treat. he's my pathetic little meow meow and I love to see him suffer (affectionate) <3

I'm also doing this as a public service so that Babe and Charlie can stay in their weird mama & papa boyfriends era without Way pulling his mind fuckery tricks on Babe

3) Kim (Kinnporsche)

hitting him with my car very lovingly simply bc he made Chay sad and we can't have that. maybe a little car accident can get him to actually admit that he's head over heels in love.

(and also because this man is way too pretty and I need to confirm that he's actually human)

4) Top (Only Friends)

listen. I believe that all of the Only Friends characters deserve to get hit by a car a little. all of them. but this man dared to say that he was serious and then went ahead and slept with someone else so. there's that.

5) Xue Yang (The Untamed/MDZS)

the most evil fucker for absolutely no reason. completely irredeemable. has the world's worst reason for being evil. I love him so much.

this guy is so fucked up that he managed to spend 3 years being all domestic with his nemesis only to realize that he actually developed feelings for him after he had already caused his death

there is absolutely no way to fix him but I'm still hitting him with my car for the amount of emotional damage he caused me with those god damn pieces of candy

6) Akk (The Eclipse)

I love him to bits and that is exactly why I'm knocking him tf out. very lovingly and rather softly but enough to give him some time off. because he deserves a break from all of the absolutely godawful authority figures in his life and what they're putting him through

7) August (Last Twilight)

this fucking b*tch.

I don't think I need to explain why I'm coming at him full speed. this is an act of public service, your honor, I'm doing nothing wrong.

8) Phee (Dead Friend Forever)

okay I know we've only had him for one single episode but this man is already stressing me out with the way he just threw away his cigarette bud in the middle of a god damn forest. sir what are you doing.

I'm only preserving the environment by hitting him with my car and getting him out of that forest, really

(also I can't pinpoint why but this guy is sus af and I don't trust him)

(the scene of crime, your honor)

9) Sprite & Zee's mom (Twins)

after @buddhamethods already took care of Zee (thank you for your service), I am volunteering to take out their mom. this woman needs the world's biggest wake-up call and since her own damn son ending up in a hospital didn't seem to do the trick, maybe herself ending up there will help

10) GramBlack double feature (Not Me)

the absolute audacity of these men to not be in love? after all of that?? I'm hitting them with my car because maybe ending up in hospital beds next to each other will finally get someone to admit that that G did not stand for Eugene what the actual fuck

(listen there are barely any scenes with actual Black and Gram together I'm working with the smallest of crumbs here bear with me)

tagging all of my moots. all of you. if you consider me your mutual, consider yourself tagged.