#the twilight saga shitpost

[babiebom]

Not to infodump but….

I feel like people forget that Jaspers whole power is that he can feel anything someone is feeling. Like I know people know that’s what his power is(do they really tho?) BUT people always seem to forget that this means that Jasper feels the thirst of every other vampire that’s around him? Like everyone is always like omfg hasn’t he had enough time to learn to control himself and it’s like …….?

He used to drink exclusively human blood which y’know makes it difficult to fully start just drinking animal blood. AND on top of that he feels the thirst of everyone around him on top of his own. Like it’s not surprising that he has a hard time controlling himself. It would be easy to control your urges if you’re only trying to control what you yourself are feeling. But trying to control yourself when feeling your feelings AND everyone else’s would be so incredibly difficult.

Like I don’t remember this ever being brought up and I lowkey feel bad for him bc everyone’s like “oh he can’t control himself” I WONDER WHY???? HMMMMMMMMM

This does not take away from his confederate side taking but y’know I just had to infodump for a second

[phil-dwyer-stan-account]

Edward trying to play baseball with his family after breaking up with Bella in New Moon

[that-stupid-lamb]

I dont think we in the twilight renaissance bring up Bella being a heavy metal enjoyer enough.

I have this vivid image of bella dragging edward to their concert and him white knuckling the whole time because this isn’t debussy

Edit: OK I GET IT THIS IS LINKON PARK NOT METAL IN ALL Y’ALL’S EYES I HAVE NOT READ THESE IN A DECADE I WAS JUST GOING FROM THE TEXT ON PAGE OK.

[okayigetitifuckedup]

Cullen men being simps

Inspired entirely by this post. The tweets are golden, and I thank you for your service in collecting them @jennifercheckwannabeme

[serialorangepeeler]

the twilight brainrot is so real rn

[runningwiththewerewolves]

i'm really out here saying i could fix the twilight saga like it's an emotionally unavailable boyfriend

[twilight-shitposting]

[kinsey3furry300]

How he thinks he looks:

How he comes across:

[forkswashington]

twilight taught us so much. perhaps the most important thing of all: abort that thang!

[gaypirate420]

Jasper Hale icons! ★(⁠*⁠￣⁠(⁠ｴ⁠)⁠￣⁠*⁠)★

[babiebom]

How the hell you spell chauffeur?/ooh fancy pants rich McGee over here! FUCK YOU!:

Dallas Winston, Two-Bit Matthews, Amy Pond, Tish Jones, Jack Harkness, Nardole, the Master, Paul Lehote, Emmett Cullen, Rosalie Hale, Derek Morgan, David Rossi, Elle Greenaway, Cat Adams, Sebastian, Sam, Abigail, Haley, Alex, Shane, Saeyoung Choi, Hyun Ryu, Yoosung Kim, Montgomery Gator, Roxanne Wolf, Bonnie Bunny, Chica Chicken, Foxy the Pirate, William Afton, Hikaru Hitachiin, Kaoru Hitachiin, Tamaki Suoh, Nea Karlsson, Meg Thomas, David King, Danny Johnson, Caleb Quinn, Jeffery Hawk, Julie, Joey, Frank, Johnny Slaughter, Robert Small

C-H-A-U-F-F-E-U-R:

Ponyboy Curtis, Darry Curtis, Martha Jones, Rory Williams, Clara Oswald, the Doctor, Seth Clearwater, Edward Cullen, Carlisle Cullen, Spencer Reid, Aaron Hotchner, Emily Prentiss, Jennifer Jareau, Jason Gideon, Maru, Penny, Leah, Emily, Elliott, Harvey, Jaehee Kang, Jumin Han, Freddy Fazbear, Henry Emily, Haruhi Fujioka, Kyoya Ootori, Takashi Morinozuka, Mitsukuni Haninozuka, Sally Smithson, Dwight Fairfield, Claudette Morel, Leon Kennedy, Susie, Herman Carter, Drayton Sawyer, Joseph Christianson.

[homisexual11]

Oh my gosh I love twilight

*unhinges jaw and swallows the saga whole*

[railmerosalie]

Back on that twilight grind

[thespiderthatedwardcullencrushed]

we don’t talk enough about the deleted scene in BD1 where edward hears jacob’s thoughts after he imprinted on respirator and edward, without a single word just turns around, snaps jake’s arm and goes back to what he was doing.

[serialorangepeeler]

21st century shit each cullen NEEDS to experience

Jasper: red dead redemption, risk (the board game), pony town, brokeback mountain

Esme: wine mom culture, smart fridges, alexa, family youtube channels

Emmett: fursuit conventions, extreme mukbang challenge videos, cocaine bear

Rosalie: beauty youtube and drama channels, a pro life rally, a call of duty lobby, getting her name mispelled at starbucks

Edward: /mu boards, thrifted carharrt jacket craze, the emo renaissance, tiktok mafia pov videos, high school counselling

Alice: glee, hoverboards, the akinator app, online lesbian discourse, depop

Carlisle: twitter gore, greys anatomy, ethel cain, the AITA subreddit, zoom nights with the denali coven

[runningwiththewerewolves]