#the thing is i wanna experience the most i can while i’m here

[clegfly]

Oh god. I’ve been summoned. Gotta carry through now!!!!!

Okay so I’ve been wanting to talk about mr outback for AGES because woo boy do I have. Thoughts. And a really fucking insane theory that I’m not sure if I believe in or am just concocting for fun but I thought of it so HERE have my thoughts

First of them being: what exactly IS mr outback. I’ve had a slight theory for a while and I guess since we’re going batshit analysis crazy here I might unleash it to be devoured chomp chomp-

Note the wording here. Not you. We have a third eye. We have a sixth sense. He sounds almost like he’s talking from personal experience.

Now, he could be including himself and some of the other more aware, ancient beings in this universe in that ‘sixth sense’ but… if we wanna take it the most literal way, we can observe that mr outback is including HIMSELF when describing the dreamers, which… opens a WHOLE new can of worms, because if that’s the interpretation you’re meant to get here, then that implies a LOT of things, chiefly…

1. Dreamers remain in the plane of reality that headspace exists upon, wandering the spaces woven by other dreamers either long after the death or some other major event within the headspace.

33000 years is… an AGE. At first you chalk that up to him being some ancient dream being created millennia ago but if we are taking the interpretation of him BEING a dreamer of some sort this implies that they remain in the realm even after death, or again, maybe some other kind of event.

Hm… wonder where we’ve seen a dreamer succumb to their headspace and become trapped inside of it during their moments of death and despair before…

I digress…

That line of thinking also brings us back to a lot of characters that can and do exist inside of headspace, for a multitude of reasons so let’s break that down-

2. Are the three great creatures really just ancient beings native to this world/Sunny's dreams, or could they be something more?

You made a really good point about this implying that headspace natives can become more aware and powerful as time goes on, but I’m wondering now… considering mr outback is possibly a dreamer himself…

Could the three great creatures also have been at some point?

Thinking back to your analysis on omori and cosmic horror- the three great creatures and sunny all have things in common with that genre. Large, god-like creatures that manipulate the universe around them in their own ways. What if Abbi, Humphrey and BYC aren’t just imaginary friends but the exact opposite, dreamers who remained in sunny’s headspace and gained his favour somehow.

It reminds me specifically of the omori beta era, before it was planned to be a game and was intended to be a graphic novel series… and how Tako, who later became Abbi, was portrayed there.

Aubrey, kel, hero and basil (or Aubrey, hiki, k and flower if you want to be pedantic) were portrayed as imaginary friends, while others, including an early version of Abbi, were portrayed as an opposite to that concept. While the actual pages showcasing this are impossible to read, it’s been stated that these characters were once important, and oh look- they appear in a three as well! Not to mention the fact that they’re rendered in the same monochromatic artstyle as omori- while I don’t think all headspaces share the same aesthetic, as an early version of the concept having the “anti-imaginary friends” presented as a identical to omori himself paints a clear message on what they were supposed to be. And what characters they later became.

Again, this is horrible quality and I’m sure I can get better images somewhere, but it’s clear that it’s tako, uni and Meido- presented here like this immediately after (or immediately before? I am NOT fishing through my camera roll to find this image again) the headspace friends, who were clearly designated as imaginary at this point almost as a foil or contrast to them- I think THIS early concept may have been what inspired the three great creatures and their role in headspace- because if YOU were a dreamer that died and had to wander the spaces created by others like you for eternity, you’d probably check out the one made by the kid with the crazy powerful imagination.

Interestingly, depending on what headspace they’re in, their forms seem to conform to the aesthetic of the place. Outback deliberately notes sunny’s as more whimsical and cutesy than usual, and just look at the designs of the TGC- not to mention the clear inspiration from sunny's childhood woven into their designs. Humphrey being from the picture book, BYC being a mix of chimera keychain and that smug ass fucking calendar, and abbi being... pretty sure we came to a consensus as a fandom that she was based off of that one pet rock, ocotaco, and a few other things, but basically, all of their designs and the way they manifest to sunny change depending on his headspace which is really cool and interesting (same thing with outback)

Basically, I think it's very possible that the great creatures could be dreamers too, wandering alike to outback and being attracted to sunny's headspace due to the immense power of his imagination. They also likely befriended him which is part of why they stayed.

Another ANOTHER interesting point we discover here- sunny in the end has total power, regardless of the other dreamers within the headspace. I mean... Abbi can be banished, Humphrey and BYC's wills can be twisted to guard the truth from Sunny... he is in control despite the fact that the great creatures are clearly powerful themselves. Which begs the question and ties back to another point you made-

Is sunny in control because this is his headspace, or does Sunny's power and authority among the three rely on the strength of his imagination?

Is that what's being implied- that the stronger or more powerful a dreamer's imagination is, the more powerful they are amongst the others?

Because GOD that is INTERESTING.

This could also translate directly to size in a manner- outback is small, regular ol' npc sized, so from that maybe we can infer that he wasn't the most imaginative of dreamers, despite his clear coherency and wisdom.

BYC, Abbi and Humphrey are all quite large, hence their names- I think in order of size it goes from Abbi or BYC to Humphrey. which can maybe be a little mini theory on its own- maybe the reason BYC is the favourite is because they're the biggest (hence big yellow cat) and therefore have a stronger imagination and sunny can relate to them more deeply? (Also mari association because of the calendar) ALSO wondering!!!!!!!!

3. Do Mari and Basil also possess this sixth sense in a way?

Do I want this part of the theory to be even at least semi true because it would be such a cool thing to tie these three together? Yes, so I'm going to try VERY HARD to prove it sjdhshdf

You speculated that Dreamers likely have some sort of connection with the dead and the afterlife, hence... mari, and the crossroads, but what if mari and basil were connected to the plane headspace exists upon in at least some way too?

Heres a thing- stranger is ODD. Like, very ODD if you chalk him up to being a being native to headspace (or i suppose black space) because he knows SO MANY THINGS about the real world that he should not be able to know if he resides solely on another plane of existence.

E.g. basil's hospital room at the end of the good ending- HOW DID HE KNOW?

Not to mention the knowledge he possesses on basil and his situation in reality that he still spouts in the omori route segments where sunny would have no way of knowing them. Clearly, there is something up with stranger- he cannot be solely bound to the plane. What if he is, at least partially, the conscience of the actual, real live basil?

And it's the same with Mari too- a hyper awareness of the plane and world she's in, the ability to reach sunny directly...

and how her and stranger/basil are linked as anomalies in the world constantly... both being linked to the truth and having heightened awareness of headspace.

It sounds similar to the three greats.

Not to mention the imagery and constant attention drawn to Mari and Sunny's sleeping patterns... and of course-

The white egret orchid. Both at Basil's house and Mari's grave.

"My thoughts will follow you into your dreams".

Spelling it out for us that both basil and mari are following sunny into his dreams- via the weird sixth sense they have. me when there's astral projection at the function (sunny's daily 17 hour nap)!!!

Basil and Mari don't seem to have their own headspaces though. The idea of basil maybe having a white space in canon was touched upon, but not much else.

A small theory one could make is that Basil and Mari have a very weak sense which is boosted by the orchids, which i think is also silly. The orchids being little power increasers... god even if none of this is canon at all (which it could very well not be) this lore speculation is so fun.

Anyway, there is a LOT more i want to touch on, but its almost been HOURS so. I'm going to leave it here and let you add on if you like danny sjdsfhbh

TL;DR- outback himself could possibly be a dreamer, which leads into a rabbit hole of many other characters being dreamers that is VERY interesting and reveals a lot of cool quirks and theories about this world and what happens within it.

God, I love this. I just. Want to keep exploring this idea so bad.

ALSO if you do wanna see a tad more content on this i recommend gray-spark (i think thats their name) on here... they do a lot of headspace (especially three greats) analysis which is all really cool and thought-provoking and inspired a good chunk of this.

OUGH I NEED TO SEE THIS MORE TALKED ABOUT!!!!!!!!!!!

So are we ever going to talk about the “headspace is real and a type of astral projection” thing or.

[cornerihaunt]

oh you guys i had a Bad Day

[2hightocare]

PRINCESS TREATMENT ✷

“In a world of boys’ he’s a gentleman” mini series—

Synopsis: Jungkook simply does everything to make you happy..

Genre: established relationship!

Warnings: pure fucking fluff… (seriously makes me wanna jump in oncoming traffic) jungkook is a bright green flag, he’s love language is “acts of service” (can be read as a standalone but I recommend reading the first part)

a/n: we all deserve oc and jungkooks kinda love.. I’m turning this into a mini series since a lot of people enjoyed it🤍

for @ohsweetmimosa !!

Falling in love was always something that you wanted, your face has always been shoved into pages of books, wondering when it would be your turn to experience that type of love. Your mom would always tell you that your expectations were too high and that no man could ever be as perfect as a fictional man.

Until you met him.

There were no words in the dictionary to describe him. No words to describe how beautifully his eyes would sparkle whenever he would tell you he loves you, the way his thumb would caress you whenever you would hold hands, or the way he would kiss away the tears that would escape your eyes.

You a hundred percent believed God made men, and sent Jungkook as an apology.

“When did you learn to braid hair…?” You curiously ask, with a slight hint of jealousy in your tone, making Jungkook laugh behind you as his fingers thread the three strands of hair repeatedly. “Watched a YouTube tutorial,” he chuckles, trying so hard not to pull your hair.

“What for..?” You stare at the mirror in front of you with the goofiest smile plastered on your face, watching your boyfriend with no shirt, a pair of sweatpants hanging low on his hips as he carefully braids your hair with his lip between his teeth.

“You always braid your hair but then complain your arms hurt from keeping them up for so long soo… why not make myself useful.” He shrugs like it’s not a big deal.

Your heart did a cartwheel, might have exploded in your chest from how fast it’s beating. But nothing new. You were so accustomed to the feeling of butterflies flying in your stomach whenever he would do or say something to you.

He drops the most beautiful phrases anyone has ever told you so casually, like it was normal. But that was your normal since you met him.

You would hear your friends talk shit about their boyfriends, how they did something or what they didn’t do, but you really just never had anything bad to say about Jungkook. He basically took "Princess treatment" to another level.

You never had to ask for flowers, never had to pull out a chair, never had to open a door, never had to enter a car freezing... because Jungkook being Jungkook went out twenty minutes earlier to turn on the heater before you would get in.

Never had to worry about leaving your wallet at home when the only thing in your bag is lip gloss. Never having to turn on your brain whenever he was around.

Locked doors? Where are the house keys? Did you leave your curler on? Jungkook got it.

“That’s so much better than mine,” you point to his ice cream as your eyes widen from how the creamy flavors melt into your mouth. “So bo—mb!” You muffle out from the mouthful of ice cream shoved into your mouth.

“Let me try yours,” he opens his mouth, waiting for you to send a spoonful of your cookies and cream into his mouth. “Here comes the airplane! Brrr,” you try making airplane noises as your hand does a weird twirl before inserting the spoonful of ice cream into your smiley boyfriend.

“Mhm,” he nods his head, humming loudly, watching you smile at him.

“I actually like yours better, baby. Let’s trade?” Jungkook hands you his small cup of ice cream as you nod happily, while you hand him yours.

Jungkook watches with the biggest smile on his face while inserting another spoonful of the creamy content as he watches you eating the new ice cream flavor enthusiastically, hearing you rave about the new book you have just finished reading and how dumb the main character is.

Jungkook's heart aches, sizing double its size, beating hard in his chest. Your cheeks and nose are rosy from the cold outside the car. You both didn’t care about eating ice cream in the middle of cold December; you guys took it as a challenge on who would get sick first.

He laughs at the lighthearted jokes you threw at him, while you take another big spoonful of the chunky ice cream that was his not so long ago.

Little did you know that he really didn’t like your ice cream flavor.

When Jungkook first met you, he knew from the start that he was a goner. The way you smile at him, how your eyes will have a small glint on them whenever you look at him, or the way you would scrunch your nose if you found something funny or cute.

It took him by surprise when you pulled the move on him, thinking you found something disgusting when you first did it.

“I will literally eat you right now!” You scrunch your nose at your smiling boyfriend who’s slightly kneeling for you to be able to see your initial carved into his haircut.

“So that means you like it?” Jungkook stands up and spins to face you. You stare up at him, his dimples on full display looking down at you with your cute outfit he helped you pick on FaceTime.

“I fucking love it baby!! I have the urge to crawl inside your skin,” you bite your lip containing the laugh you’re trying hard to contain, failing miserably when Jungkook raises an eyebrow with a smirk on his face. “That’s… cute,” he replies before kissing off the little nose scrunch he loves so much off your face.

“Is that like your ‘cutie mark’?” You quip, your arms wrapping themselves around his shoulders. “Cutie mark?” He asks, a hint of interest in his voice while he wraps his arms around your waist pulling you closer to him.

“You never watched My Little Pony?” You fake gasp, eyes widening.

“I’ve heard of it, but me sitting down to watch ponies with superpowers… yeah, no.” Jungkook squeezes your waist as he explains.

“You suck,” you roll your eyes playfully sticking your tongue out before entangling yourself off his arms and making your way to the couch.

“Come big baby, we are watching My Little Pony.” You pat the empty couch space beside you.

He watched every season... all nine seasons with you.

Jungkook just wanted to make your life easier; you were always known for being “Miss Independent” in your family and amongst your friends, but here you were letting a man put your heels on for you.

“Too loose or…?” Your boyfriend looks up to you from his kneeling-down position in front of you.

“You look really good on your knees, sir.” You say instead with a sly smirk on your face, ignoring his question. “Pshh,” he rolls his eyes as he chuckles, tying a bow on your lace-up heels.

“Since when do you not flirt back?” You pout watching your boyfriend repeat his actions on the other foot. “Since we are late... and can’t be any more late.” He looks up with a mischievous grin on his face.

“Psh, okay.” You blow out in defeat as your boyfriend chuckles underneath you.

“Come on princess, let's go!” He stands up, giving you a hand for you to stand up off the bed.

The long rides to your guys' destinations were your favorite; Jungkook had given you the “passenger princess” award ever since you set foot in his car. He even installed a light-up mirror on your sun visor whenever you needed to fix your hair or makeup in the car.

Jungkook would listen to your little playlists. He still remembers when you explained to him that each playlist has a different emotion, which made him laugh. Now, anytime you played a song, he would ask you what emotion you were feeling right now.

“What emotion are you feeling right now baby?” He squeezes your thigh as he stops at a red light. The reddish hue illuminates your guy's face. “In love,” you turn your head to the side, staring at your boyfriend who’s already looking at you.

His eyes twinkle as he stares at you, a big smile adorns his face. As you mirror his actions before leaning in and giving him a kiss on the lips, his eyelids immediately flutter close.

“‘Cause I got my mind on you... I’ve got my mind on you.”

Plays softly from the car speaker; you smile into the kiss. “I love you.” He whispers softly. “I love you.” You whisper back.

[baby-yongbok]

Remedies

OT8 x Reader

Genre - Comfort WC - 746

Summary - These are ways that I think the boys would help you to get over your mental and/or physical struggles Content Warning - Themes of mental and physical illness/struggles, mention of hospitals, mentions of medications/needles, mentions of food

A/N - I wrote this on my living room floor just now because I’m sick of being sick. I’m sick of being chronically ill, and I needed some comfort, so I thought I’d share it for anyone else who could use some comfort, too. I based these off of my experiences with my illnesses/disabilities. If you can relate then I just wanna say that i see you and you're strong. Keep fighting 💕+ I tried to write this to be gender neutral, I think I nailed it

✧ Masterlist ✧

Hugs from Jisung when your panic attacks have subsided. He whispers sweet praises of “You're okay” and “You're so strong” while he rocks you in his lap. You're still on the floor where he found you. His shirt soaks up every tear and his soft kisses on your forehead bandage every wound. You tell him that he can go, you apologize for causing a commotion, but he just holds you closer.

Laughing with Changbin while he tries to distract you from your symptoms flaring up. He's loud and silly on the couch with you. He's careful not to go overboard, he watches you to make sure that you're still comfortable while he makes silly voices and dances around for you. He's not ready to watch you cry yourself to sleep from the pain but he'll be ready to make you laugh again when you need it most.

Kisses from Chan while you're at your doctor's appointment. Your leg is shaking and he's soothing gentle circles into your back while he kisses your knuckles. He knows that you're scared, he is too. You have no idea what the doctor will say but he knows one thing for sure, no matter what the results are he'll be right by your side. He'll fight with you every single day and he'll kiss the pain away.

Adventures with Hyunjin when he realizes that you're avoiding going outside again. He knows that you get paranoid. He knows that every corner that you turn feels unsafe so he holds your hand. He skips across streets with you and dances on the white lines of the cross walks. He pulls you into shops that you've been too scared to visit yourself and buys you everything that you touch. He molds new memories with you with his bare hands. He'll do it everyday if he has to.

Cooking with Minho when he sees that you've been watching your diet too closely. He's gentle with you. You taste test everything together, he feeds you with silver spoons and kisses your nose with every hesitant swallow. He stands behind you while you stir the contents in the pots and plucks flour at you to see that pretty smile that he loves so much. He feeds you from his fork and he wipes away the mess. He makes it feel like it all goes down easy.

Reading with Seungmin when he comes to visit you in the hospital. He knows that you feel like you're going mad in here. He knows that you want to get up out of bed and walk out of here with him, that's what he wants too. Instead he holds your hand while you rest your head on his shoulder. He reads you each word with a softness that somehow drowns out the beeping of your monitors and the commotion on the other side of the curtain. He transports you to a place where you aren't sick. To a place where it's just you and him.

Cuddling with Jeongin when you feel that dark cloud consuming you again. He knew what was wrong when you let your alarms ring on for the third day in a row. You're huddled under blankets together, unmoving and quiet. His arms circle your waist and he pulls you closer. He weighs you down to reality. He makes you feel something besides the bubbling emptiness in your chest. He hums to you when the tears start to fall. He hums and holds you tighter. He won't let you drift away.

Singing with Felix while he helps you with your medication. There's so many to take that you've been overwhelmed with it all so he puts on a playlist and grabs all your pills. He lays them out and organizes them just how you need them. He uses the TV remote as a microphone, passing it to you when he sees you staring at the medicine littering the tabletop. He has you sing for him when he gives you your injections. He makes them as quick and painless as he can, always joining you for a high note as he sticks the band-aid on for you. He spins and hugs you once you're done for the day. He doesn't have to give you any praise, you can feel the love in his touch. You can hear it in his voice and see it in his actions. He's always going to be there to make it all feel easier.

If you liked this and wanna see more of this content let me know!

Thank You For Reading! Please Reblog or Comment to let me know how you liked it! It makes my day! 💕

Perm. Tag List:

@kayleefriedchicken

@compersian @kibs-and-bits @lixiluvs @armystay89 @lghtdarling

@teddy-stay , @baconcupcakes123, @moonchild9350 ,

@krayzieestay, @soulsbbg , @stay-bi , @yzsqu , @gho-ster , @lghtdarling

[buckys-wintersoldier]

I only want you | Bucky Barnes

Pairing -> BestFriend!Bucky Barnes x BestFriend!Female!Reader

Summary -> During the party he confesses his feelings for you, he kisses you but the next day he isn’t the same anymore. Your best friend is the biggest idiot you have ever seen and you don’t know why.

Warnings -> Bucky being an idiot, mention of Bucky’s past/trauma, Sharon being a bitch, hurt/comfort, angst, crying, kind of insults, fluff

Wordcount -> 7.1k (it’s long but it’s worth it, I guess)

A/N: I want to thank @mrsbuckybarnes1917 for listening when I came up with that idea as well as supporting me to find the way through all the ideas, and thank you so much for proofreading it, I really appreciate it. I’m sorry when I hurt someone, trust me I cried a lot while I wrote that oneshot but I just needed to write something to calm down my feelings and yeah here we are. I hope you all enjoy it.

Divider made by @firefly-graphics.

Masterlist | Bucky Barnes Masterlist

Bucky isn’t really a drinker, especially not since he became the Winter Soldier. He enjoys the taste, but the serum that is constantly running through his veins makes it impossible for him to experience the effects of the alcohol. It isn’t rare that he wishes to get drunk so he can forget all the memories of the things she did during the time with Hydra. It’s like Thor knew exactly about his thoughts because he is waving a flask of Asgardian Ale in front of Bucky, and the brown-haired man decides it is the perfect opportunity to drink his troubles away.

“Buck, you shouldn’t drink too much of that Asgardian Ale,” you mumble while you sit next to your best friend and look at him. You know about his trouble and about his traumatic past, but you also know it’s never an opportunity to drink it away. He has the glass completely full again and smiles at you.

“It’s oke; I can’t get too drunk. I’m the Wiener Soldier,” he says and bursts out laughing. Then he lifts his glass and turns around. "Cheers!" he shouts through the room, even when it’s almost impossible that someone hears it.

The music is way too loud to hear your own words without shouting. So it isn’t surprising when the people in the room don’t hear what Bucky shouts. Except for the two next to him, you and Steve.

“Cheers, pal!" Steve shouts and lifts his glass as well. He smiles at Bucky before he pours the liquid down his throat. You shake your head and turn around. Your back leans against the counter, and you place your forearms on top of the counter, looking at the people dancing in the middle of the room.

“Haven’t felt like that since the 40’s,” Bucky groans, filling his glass again. Then he turns to you and looks straight into your eyes. “I feel like I’m 20 again; it feels better than I thought. Do you always feel like that?” he asks and places his hand on your shoulder, standing up slowly to stand in front of you.

Then he winks at you while he almost falls to the side. You almost burst out laughing when he tries to grab something to not fall.

“Woah, the room is spinning. I didn’t know Tony was able to build something like that,” your best friend says while holding your shoulders so he won’t fall down.

You look at him and grip his arms to lead him to the seat next to you again, but he doesn’t want to move. You giggle when he leans closer, and the stubble from his beard tickles you. Bucky kisses your cheek softly.

“My lady, wanna dance with me?” he asks and looks at you with the most adorable puppy look.

His blue eyes are almost begging you to dance with him, and even when you would prefer to bring him into his room and make sure he goes to sleep, you can’t say no.

With a nod, you stand up as well, and he wraps his arms immediately around your waist. He doesn’t walk far away from the counter, just a few steps, so the two of you can dance without crashing against something. Bucky spins you around while he holds you still, pressed against him.

You wonder how it must feel for him when the room is already spinning, but the way he smiles and looks at you makes your mind dizzy, and you can’t think of anything other than him. You lay your head against his shoulder, and the heat of his body warms you. His hands are around your waist, making you almost melt in his embrace, and you could stay like that for the rest of the evening.

After a few minutes and Bucky almost lying on the ground and sleeping, you push him to the seats. Making sure he doesn’t miss the chair, when he sits, he immediately looks for his glass.

“Where is it? I’m thirsty," he says, looking at you with a slightly sad gaze.

You feel a bit sorry for him, but you reach for another glass, this time with water. Bucky looks at it skeptically, but then he pours it down his throat. Shaking his head like it’s something awful he doesn’t like. You chuckle, and it makes him look at you.

“Have you ever tried that? That’s awful,” he tells you and offers you the glass even when it’s empty.

“It’s not that bad,” you reply, and you take the glass to place it on the counter next to you.

“We should bring you into your room, you should sleep a bit,” you say, taking his hands into yours.

Before you can pull him up, and with you out of the room, he pulls you closer, and his lips are just a few inches away from yours. He is so close that you can feel his breath against your lips; it's warm and smells strongly of the ale he has consumed. You need to close your eyes for a moment. The man in front of you is making you go crazy.

“I don’t want to go to bed, not yet. I want to kiss you first, can I?” he asks you, and you immediately feel like he is Bucky from the 40’s again. And even when you don’t agree to drink his troubles away, you’re happy that he doesn’t have to suffer with his past right now. And let’s be honest, the 40’s Bucky is a gentleman, and you always wanted to know him; now you have the chance, at least for tonight.

“Doll?” Bucky asks, and you feel a shiver along your spine because of his soft voice.

You look into his eyes and smile softly.

“Of course,” you answer, not sure anymore about the question he asked.

He leans closer and kisses you softly. Bucky’s pink, plumb lips are so soft on yours, you never imagined them being that soft. You slide your hands through his hair, playing with his light curls. His lips move slowly against yours, while he lets you feel everything you tried to avoid when you’re around him. The feeling in your stomach whenever he touches you, the way he looks at you, or talks to you. You adore the way he tells you ‘Doll’ and you enjoy every moment you can spend with your best friend.

And that’s the point where you thought he would never feel the same for you. He is your best friend, and he was always a gentleman, so you were sure he was just nice. And now he is kissing you, with his hands at your waist, holding you close. Bucky is drunk, so you aren’t sure if it’s just a situation of his drunken state, but they always say: drunk people tell the truth, so he would feel the same for you as you feel for him.

When the two of you move a few inches away from each other, you still look into his eyes. His gaze looks a bit foggy, but you can also see the storm in his blue eyes.

“I love you; you’re the most adorable girl I know. You don’t know what you do to me whenever you look at me or just touch me softly. My feelings go crazy, and whenever another man walks close to you, I want to push them away and tell them you’re mine. I can’t sleep because I think of you; when you’re in a room with me, I can’t concentrate on something else, just on you,” Bucky says, and he smiles softly, his cheeks turning slightly red. “I have loved you for so long, but I thought you would never love me the same way. I was the Winter Soldier, and I don’t think I deserve someone brave, strong, wonderful, and perfect like you,” he adds, leaning his forehead against yours, wanting you to be as close as possible and feel your warmth.

You smile and press your lips against his again. The tingling feeling in your stomach grows again, and when he stands up, he towers over you, placing his hands around your cheeks, and he pulls you closer.

“I love you so much, my doll,” he whispers and slowly lets go of you, his hands gripping your waist again.

“I love you too, Buck. And you deserve everything good; it wasn’t you when you were the Winter Soldier. You’re a gentleman and the most precious one; I love the way you care about everyone you love,” you tell him, and he blushes.

Bucky lifts one of his hands and presses two of his fingers onto your lips, trying to make you shut up before you can compliment him more.

“You need more than two fingers to make me shut up,” you giggle, and his smile grows before he leans down and presses his lips on yours. He makes you speechless with the way his soft and warm lips move against yours.

“You two are almost disgusting,” Steve mumbles next to you, making you chuckle.

When you and Bucky break the kiss, you look at Steve. He still looks at you and blushes when he recognizes that you caught him looking at you and Bucky.

“You think it’s almost disgusting, but you can’t stop looking at us, huh?” you ask, and he immediately turns his head away while his cheeks get deeply red.

When you turn your head back to look at Bucky, you feel a burning look in your back. Without looking around, you already know the person who is staring at you with the same angry gaze; she always looks at you. Bucky recognizes your thoughtful look and looks up to see the person behind you. His hand clenches around your waist, and you hiss softly.

“Sorry, doll,” he mumbles, immediately losing his grip around your waist.

“Tony is staring at mine,” he growls, and you look around. You see Tony standing on the other side of the room and looking in your direction. He looks annoyed, and when you look a few inches further to the side, you see the person who is burning a hole in your back. Bucky thinks it’s Tony who is looking at you, but you know he is just listening to the person next to him. She is the one who hates you for being Bucky’s best friend, and now she will hate you more because Bucky kissed you. Sharon has had a crush on Bucky since you met her the first time, and he sometimes looks flirty around her, but he is always like that around friends. Otherwise, he would date Tony, Thor, or Steve as well.

The next morning, you wake up to the sun slowly brightening your room. You open your eyes and smile when the flashbacks of the last night come back into your mind. You and Bucky shared a lot more kisses, soft touches, and dances during the night.

You sit up slowly, stretching your limbs, and look at the clock. It’s just a bit after ten in the morning. After a few more minutes where you just look out of the window and enjoy the sun and the comfortable silence in your room, you stand up and walk through your bathroom.

With a few movements, you get out of your clothes and walk into the shower. The hot water runs along your body, and you feel your muscles relaxing under the warmth. You close your eyes, enjoying the moment just for you. In front of your eyes, you see Bucky kissing you the way he did last night. Your fingers are brushing softly over your lips, and for a moment, you feel like he is kissing you again. His hands are around your waist, and his body is pressing against yours.

But when you open your eyes, you just hear the sound of the water and your towel in front of you. No Bucky, right now. Just the thoughts making you smile again and the feeling in your stomach are the most wonderful you have ever felt until now. You are already excited to see him in a few minutes, but first you need to finish your shower and choose some comfortable clothes to wear.

With the biggest smile on your lips, you walk through the floor and into the shared kitchen.

“Someone looks really happy today,” Tony says, and you blush immediately.

Your eyes scan the room, so you can find Bucky and go to him. Talk to him about the last night and make sure you meant what you said. When you walk a few steps further into your room, you see Steve lying on the couch, holding his hand and groaning.

“I don’t know what happened last night. Tony, how can you manage to never have a headache?” he asks, and Tony laughs before he places his hand on Steve’s shoulder.

"Painkillers are really useful. It doesn't help to remember, but they help against the other effects after being drunk,” he says, and Steve nods. He doesn’t want to get up, so he just closes his eyes and tries to sleep a while longer.

You look around and see Bucky in front of the counter. Sharon stands next to him, and her hand rubs his back up and down. You roll your eyes, disgusted about the other girl, as you walk to them.

“Hey, Buck,” you say with a smile, and when the brown-haired man turns around, he smiles softly.

But in another way, as usual, he looks a bit sad, and instead of looking at you, he looks to the side.

“Hey,” he mumbles and takes his bowl with cereal.

Then he walks to the table, and Sharon follows him. You look at them both; maybe he has a hangover? You try to push the negative thoughts away and make yourself a bowl with your favorite cereals. You walk around the table and sit down in front of Bucky; he doesn’t look at you, and he doesn’t talk to you. He was just focused on his cereals and probably deep in his own thoughts.

“Buck?” You ask carefully, and he hums but still doesn’t look up from his bowl. “Can we talk? I mean just you and me?”

He nods in response and finishes his breakfast, then finally looks up to see you. But something is still different when he just loves to look into your eyes and adore the colors, but this time he looks at you like you’re someone else.

He waits until you finish your breakfast as well, and then he follows you through your room. Your best friend closes the door behind himself and looks at you.

“What’s up?” He asks with a cold voice, and you shiver immediately.

“Do you remember last night?” you ask, playing with your hands. You don’t want to look at him; you’re scared about the way he looks at you.

“No, but Sharon told me about it,” he tells you, and you nod softly.

For a moment, the two of you are quiet. You don’t know what to say, but the silence is uncomfortable as well. You shift from one foot to the other, your hands sweating, and you feel like you need to throw up.

“Why are you so cold?” you then ask and look at Bucky.

He clenches his jaw with his eyes staring at you, and the way he looks at you makes you even more uncomfortable. He never looked at you like that; the coldness almost showed hate in his eyes, and you can’t help but feel the tears burning in your eyes. He notices the tears in your eyes, and a sarcastic grin forms on his lips.

“Why are you crying now?” Bucky asks you loudly; you hiss and feel so small in front of him.

“You- Buck, yo-” You start to say something, but he interrupts you.

“Don’t call me ‘Buck’ or ‘Bucky’. You have no right to say that. You don’t deserve to say that,” he shouts, and your eyes widen.

“What do you want me to call you then?” you ask, trying to wipe the tears in your eyes away.

“Use my name. I have it for a reason,” he says, and you nod, not able to say anything.

You don’t know what happened to him. Last night he confessed his love to you, and now he acts like he hates you and has never even thought about loving you.

“Want to talk now or not? I have better things to do,” he says, rolling his eyes annoyed.

You feel a tear slowly falling down your cheek, not knowing the man in front of you anymore. He isn’t like your best friend; he isn’t like the one you fall in love with; he isn’t the one who kissed you yesterday; and he isn’t the Bucky, you know.

You shake your head. You want to talk; you really want to, but you can’t. At least not with the man in front of you. Was it all a lie? Was it all just fake? Or what happened that he is the way he is right now.

“Good,” he says, and he turns around to leave the room.

The moment he closes the door behind himself, you break down on the floor. You fall on your knees, the tears streaming down your cheeks, and you’re sobbing loudly. There is no feeling inside of you right now; you feel empty. You stare at the wall in front of you, his face in your mind, his smell, and the way he kissed you last night. You hear his words, like he is standing next to you and saying them to you. The ones of the night when he confesses his love to you and the ones he said a few minutes ago when he was looking at you with his cold, blue eyes.

“I love you; you’re the most adorable girl I know.”

“Don’t call me ‘Buck’ or ‘Bucky’.”

“I can’t sleep because I think of you; when you’re in a room with me, I can’t concentrate on something else, just on you.”

“Want to talk now or not? I have better things to do.”

It takes a while until you slowly calm down. You're curled on the floor, and the tears are still streaming down your cheeks. But your sobbing is quieter, and you slowly fall asleep on the floor. All the tears and the crying make you so sleepy that you don’t recognize Steve walking into your room and lifting you up to place you in your bed.

He sits next to you, his fingers stroking your hair softly out of your face, and he looks at you with a soft but sad smile. He saw Bucky walking out of the room, his gaze as cold as the whole morning, and even when he doesn’t know what happened at the party, he doesn’t want to leave you alone. But he also doesn’t want to interrupt you while you’re crying because he knows you would have to hide it, and he knows you need to let the feelings out of your body.

You don’t sleep well; nightmares interrupt your sleep every time, but you’re too tired to stay awake for a while. In every dream is Bucky; first he helps you, but in the next moment he shouts at you, laughs at you, and does everything you never thought he would do to you. You’re sweating and whimpering in your sleep, turning from one side to the other.

Steve tries to comfort you with his hand on your thigh, but it doesn’t work. With widened eyes, you wake up, starting to cry again for a few minutes before you fall asleep again. You don’t mind if someone sees you crying or not; you can’t escape Bucky, his coldness, not even in your dreams, and it robs you of all of the strength you have.

“Y/N?” Steve asks when you’re awake, but you turn around so you don’t have to face him.

You mumble a soft ‘mhm’. Steve sighs, his fingers drawing small circles on your thigh.

“Do you want to tell me what happened?” he asks, but you shake your head.

You just want to be alone right now. Steve nods and stands up, walking through the door, but before he leaves the room, he turns to you.

“If you need me, you can call me or just come to my room,” he offers.

“Thank you,” you whimper, and the tears are streaming down your face again.

You can’t stop thinking about Bucky; he is burned in your mind like something you need to be. Something you need to be happy, and yes, he is someone you need to be happy. Without him, it doesn’t feel the same; watching your favorite movie wouldn’t be as fun because there is someone missing who holds you when you cry out of joy because they are married. Playing board games wouldn’t be the same because the one freaking out because he doesn’t get what he wants isn't playing the board games with you. Eating your favorite snacks and ice cream wouldn’t be the same because the one man who always laughs about your snack and ice cream decisions wouldn’t laugh. The one cuddling up wouldn’t let you cuddle with him, and you would miss HIS warmth and HIS scent. It’s not just a man; it’s the ONE man; it’s Bucky.

Wrapped in your blanket, you sit against the headboard of your bed. Looking through the channels for something that could distract you. But you feel like Bucky is manipulating the television because every channel shows a movie you used to watch with Bucky.

Everything reminds you of him: every place, every movement. Every second reminds you of Bucky, the memories you both have, and the moments you shared. And now he treats you like you’re the worst thing he has ever seen, and there is no reason why he does it, right?

You don’t want to sit in your room, but you don’t want to see Bucky somewhere as well. But you feel hungry after some time, and even when you wish you didn’t have to stand up to get some food, you don’t want to make yourself feel worse just because of Bucky.

So you slowly get up; it’s already afternoon when you walk through your room. Before you reach the door, you see the pictures on your wall. He and you took so many pictures during trips or parties, some when he was joking and others when he tried to look mad. Even when he really looks like a pouting puppy, when he tries to look mad at you, you always laugh about his pouting face.

You open your door and immediately hear the voices of the others. But there are not a lot of them; just three of them are there and talk. Steve, Bucky, and Sharon. With quiet footsteps, you walk closer to the room. You look at the floor, hoping that no one will see you.

But when your feet meet the ground in the room, the gazes of the three of them are immediately on you. Steve smiles sadly when he sees you. You probably look like a wrack, with red eyes and tears all over your face, but you don’t mind. Sharon looks at you with a smile, and Bucky is as cold as before.

When you make your way to the counter, you hear Sharon flirting with Bucky, and you feel like you want to throw up. You hate her, especially since she is a jealous bitch when you’re with Bucky. And now he has him for himself - exactly the plan she had.

“Buck, look at me,” she says, and you look around to see what they do. That’s the moment you wish you wouldn’t be in the room right now. Sharon leans closer, and her lips meet Bucky’s softly. His arms are wrapped around her waist, and you see yourself in her. The moment you had last night, and now he kisses her, not the one he confessed his love to last night.

The tears forming in your eyes - they're burning. They slowly stream down your cheeks, but you don't make a noise; you just look at them until they break the kiss, and Sharon looks at you with a wide bitch smile again.

“You’re right!" you shout, and Bucky turns around to look at you as well.

With a confused gaze, the two men look at you, and you chuckle sarcastically.

“You don’t deserve me. You’re an idiot, and I would prefer to be killed by the Winter Soldier instead of being your best friend,” you shout, and you see the change in his gaze.

You don’t mean it, not really, but the anger inside of you lets you say things like that.

You see, you hurt him by saying that he has nightmares because of the Winter Soldier; he blames himself for that, and you were the one who was able to give him moments where he didn’t blame himself, but now that you mention the Winter Soldier in a way, you hurt him the most you can. And you’re sorry for that, but you hate him so much right now that you can’t stop yourself from telling him things like that.

“I feel like he would love more than you ever can,” you say, and you walk a few steps closer to him. “I hate you, in a way I never thought it would be possible,” you hiss and turn away to grab some food from the counter before you leave the room.

Bucky looks at you, and the moment those words leave your mouth, his small world breaks a bit more. The only person who loved him so much hates him now. But he deserves it, doesn’t he? And he can’t bring himself to walk to you and ask what he did because he is way too mad at you for a reason he doesn’t want to admit in front of you.

It's been a week now since you saw Sharon and Bucky kissing each other. The day he started to be an ass and the day you told him he didn’t deserve you. And you didn’t change your mind; he hasn't been nice to you since that day; he ignores you; he doesn’t even look at you. His arms are always around Sharon’s body, and his lips are on hers.

You don’t really care about yourself anymore; you’re mostly in your room, crying or just laying there and waiting until you finally fall asleep. Steve tries every day to get you out of bed and wants to plan your favorite trips, but every one of them reminds you of Bucky, and you prefer your warm and comforting bed.

Someone knocks at your door, and you hum in response before Steve opens the door.

“Want to eat something? I cooked, and you need to eat,” he says, but you shake your head and turn around so you don’t have to face him.

Steve sighs softly and walks closer to you. He sits next to you on your bed and runs his fingers along your side.

“Do you want to tell me what happened between you and Buck? He looks different as well since the party,” Steve says thoughtfully, and you slowly turn around to look at him.

Your eyes are red, and he can see the tears all over your cheeks. Steve lifts his hand and wipes the tears away, smiling softly at you. You slowly sit up, your back against the headboard of your bed, and you pull your knees against your chest, wrapping your arms around them and placing your head on your knees.

“I thought-“ you sob quietly. “He said he loved me, and then he suddenly was with Sharon,” you mumble, and you can’t stop the tears again.

“He told you he loved you? When? I mean, I know it, but when did he tell you?” Steve asks, and your eyes widen for a moment.

He knows that Bucky loves you? What happened to Bucky being the way he is when he really loves you? Why is he kissing Sharon when he could have you? He could have the one he really loves.

“At the party, he told me he loved me. He kissed me,” you mumble, and Steve’s jaw drops.

“He finally managed it?” he asks, and you nod.

“And the next day he was the idiot he is, kissing Sharon, and it looks like they are happy together,” you tell him, and he shakes his head.

“I need to talk to him,” he tells you, leaning forward to kiss your cheek.

You look at him while he leaves your room. He almost runs out of it, and you don’t know why, but you don’t mind. Steve wants to talk to Bucky, but it won’t change his feelings for Sharon. And maybe Bucky thought it was her when the two of you kissed. Maybe he thought it was her when he confessed his feelings.

Meanwhile, Steve rushes into Bucky’s room. He sits on the edge of his bed, staring at the television. He doesn’t want to see Sharon today; he misses you, even when it’s just looking at you or hearing you talk. But since you’re in your room and only outside when you’re sure no one else is outside, he hasn’t heard or seen you in days.

“Buck?” Steve asks softly, and Bucky turns his head to look at the brown-haired man. He looks more broken than ever before. Steve walks closer to Bucky and lets himself fall next to his best friend in bed. “Where is Sharon?” he asks, and Bucky shrugs.

“Don’t care,” he says, and he stares in front of him again.

“Pal, what happened that you’re the way you are with y/n?” Steve looks at Bucky and sees the small tear escaping the corner of his eye.

"Nothing; she doesn’t want me,” he answers, and Steve chuckles softly. Stubborn idiot, but still his best friend and the idiot in love with you.

“She told me you confessed your love for her. And the two of you kissed. When she told me, I remembered, and it was her; it wasn’t Sharon, pal,” Steve continues, and Bucky’s eyes widen before he looks at his best friend again.

“We did what? And Sharon, what?” he asks.

“You kissed. You and y/n. But Sharon was just standing next to Tony on the other side of the room and was staring at the two of you,” he repeats, telling Bucky what he remembers. Bucky shakes his head, thinking about the version of the party and then the version he heard.

That’s definitely not what he heard about the evening. That’s not even similar to the things someone told him about.

“No, that’s not true,” Bucky says thoughtfully. “But even when, don't you know anymore what she said? She hates me, Steve." Bucky mumbles, and he feels even worse when he thinks about you, the way he treats you, and the things you said to him. Even when he understands it now, he understands why you said those things.

“I need to talk to her,” Bucky mumbles, but then he shakes his head. “Do you think she would listen?” he asks and looks at Steve, who nods.

“She is in love with you. Even when you’re such an idiot,” Steve tells him, pushing his best friend up. “Talk to her, pal,” he says, and Bucky smiles softly before he walks through the door.

He isn’t sure what to say when he talks to you. Maybe you don’t want to listen; maybe you won’t understand. Or do you really hate him now? Do you want to see him? So many thoughts run through his mind while he walks along the floor, unsure what to do or say when you ignore him or if he messed up after all the things with Sharon.

Bucky reaches your door and knocks softly. He hears your softy ‘come in’ and he opens the door. Now it’s too late to turn around; he has to talk to you now. You look at him, and your gaze gets. immediately cold.

“James,” you say, and he shivers slightly.

He didn’t know something inside of him could break more, but when you called him ‘James’ with that cold voice, something inside of him broke more.

“Doll,” he mumbles, closing the door behind him.

“Don’t call me that; call your new fucktoy that,” you hiss, and he looks at the floor.

You’re mad; he has never seen you like that before, but he can’t blame you. You’re hurt, and he is the reason for that. He hurts you so badly, but he loves you so much more than he can ever tell you. He can’t and doesn't want to be without you when there is just a percent chance for him to be yours. He would do everything to be yours.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbles. He hates when you’re so harsh and cold, but he understands it.

“What do you want here?” you ask, and he plays with his hands before he answers.

“I want to talk to you,” Bucky says quietly, and you chuckle sarcastically.

“I don’t want to talk to you, James,” you say, and you see him wiping some tears away.

“Please,” he begs, but you shake your head. “Can you please listen to me? Please?” he tries again, and he doesn’t want to go without telling you everything he feels, everything about the way he acted, especially why he acted like that. “Doll, please listen to me. Just this time, if you want me to go, then I will, and I will never talk to you again if you don’t want me to,” he says and sobs quietly.

You haven’t seen Bucky crying; sometimes he looked like he was about to cry, but he never cried. And now he stands in front of you, begging and crying for you to listen to him. And you want to listen, but the anger inside of you gets in control of you.

“You could have talked to me earlier. I fucking- I don’t care anymore,” you shout, and he flinches.

The strong super soldier looks like a small boy.

“Please, I love-“

“Shut the fuck up. I don’t want to hear all those lies anymore. Just shut up and go with those lies to your new girl,” you say, anger in your voice, and Bucky can’t stop the tears streaming down your cheeks.

He hurt you more than he thought he did. But he was so mad at you; he was mad about the things he heard. And now he is about to lose the most important person in his life. He loves you more than everything; he never loved someone as much as he loves you.

“I’m sorry for hurting you. I really am. I love you,” he whispers, and you shake your head sarcastically, laughing.

“I saw that. You treated me like the worst person you know; that’s love for you?" you ask, and he immediately shakes his head.

“No, but I didn’t know about the things that happened during the party,” he says, and he walks a step closer, slowly, to make sure you’re oke with it.

You want to throw him out of your room, but you also want to know what happened and why he was the way he was. He wouldn’t beg and cry when it wasn't important to him. So you accept when he takes a seat at the edge of your bed and looks at you. His eyes are red, and you can see the traces of his tears on his cheeks.

“I’m so sorry,” he mumbles, still blaming himself for doing all this to you. Bucky wants to touch you; he wants to hug you; and he wishes you would tell him it’s oke. But he knows he needs to explain his behavior before he can get some of that; when you’re ready to do it, then.

“What happened that night?”

He is interested in knowing what happened, and you clear your throat before you think about it again. When he turned into an idiot, you tried to avoid all his touches, his words, and his kisses so you didn’t need to cry all the time. And now he wants to know the truth, and you want to tell him, but you don’t want to cry because of that.

“Thor had some Asgardian alcohol there, and it made you drunk. We danced a bit; you told me you loved me; you kissed me,” you tell him, and he nods.

“You didn’t flirt with someone else?” he asks, and you shake your head.

“No, why should I? I love you, and I was happy you felt the same, but then you acted completely different the next day,” you mumble and look at him.

Bucky is playing with his fingers; you see the way he suffers because of his metal arm, and you remember the things you said about the Winter Soldier, and he probably hates his metal arm even more now.

“Why did you do it the way you did, and why are you suddenly so nice again?” you ask, and his jaw clenches slightly. Not in an angry way, but more in a thoughtful clenching.

“The morning after the party, I had a bad hangover and didn’t remember much of that night. I know that I kissed someone, but I don’t know the person. Sharon came into the room, and she asked me how the party was, and I told her I didn't know because I had too much alcohol. She wrapped her arms around my waist, and when I asked her why she said I kissed her that night,” he tells you, and you nod, blaming yourself for being the same way to Bucky as he was to you, even though it’s not his fault.

“I told her I don’t love her because I love you. And she told me about your night with a guy I don’t know. Sharon said you were flirting with me, but you have someone else, and you were flirting with me so you can make jokes with your boy about me being so dumb and really think you could love me the way I love you,” he continues, and your jaw drops slightly.

“Bu- James, there is no one else. I love you, and when you changed into the idiot you were, I hated the thought of you touching Sharon and the way you kissed her. But when you love me, why did you kiss her?” you ask, and Bucky runs his fingers through his hair.

“I wanted a distraction,” he whispers quietly, ashamed of that.

For a moment, you both sit in silence, looking at each other. “Did you really mean it?” he asks, and you furrow your eyebrows in confusion.

"When you said those things about the Winter Soldier?” He asks, and you see his hands shaking softly. His anxiety gets worse when he thinks about your answer; maybe you could really mean it? Maybe you really think the Winter Soldier could love more than Bucky can?

“No, I was mad. I’m sorry, Buck,” you say, and he nods. You smile softly when he doesn’t tell you to stop calling him ‘Buck’. “I’m really sorry, but I didn’t see how much I would hurt you with that,” you add.

“I think I deserve it,” he replies, and you want to agree, but you also know it would make him feel worse.

He was an idiot, but now that he sits there, he begs and cries that you listen to him so he can excuse his behavior. He blames himself for so much; you don’t want him to blame himself for more.

“Buck?” you ask, and he hums in response. “Tell me the truth, please.”

You look into his eyes; the blue is as warm as the one you’re used to seeing when he is with you.

“I love you, doll. I never wanted to hurt you; I want to be yours. I want you to be mine,” he says, blushing slightly. You don’t know what to say. You want to tell him you feel the same, but at the same time, you’re scared he will go to Sharon when you’re not enough for him anymore. “I’m sorry, you had to listen. But thank you for listening,” he tells you and stands up to leave the room.

You reach for his metal arm, and he flinches when you touch it.

“Sorry,” you say, slightly shocked, and let go of his arm. Bucky turns around and smiles softly.

“Just didn’t think you would touch it.” His voice is so soft, exactly the way you love when he talks to you.

“Can you stay?” you ask and look down; maybe he would prefer to go to Sharon because you were really mean?

Bucky’s smile grows, and he lets himself fall down next to you and wraps his arms around your body, pulling you into his lap. His hands slide your back up and down, and he looks into your eyes like they are the most adorable things he has ever seen. Your arms are wrapped around his neck, and you play with his soft hair.

He leans closer, his lips almost touching yours, when you stop him.

“Did you brush your teeth and clean your face after she kissed you?” you ask with a raised eyebrow, and Bucky can’t stop himself and bursts out laughing.

“Yes,” he whispers, and he places one of his hands on your neck to pull you closer. His lips touch yours softly, and you almost melt in his embrace. Bucky moves his lips against yours, and a small smile appears on his lips.

“I love you, James,” you mumble against his lips, and he rolls his eyes.

“Can you be serious for a moment, doll?” he asks, laughing, and you look like you need to think about it before you answer him.

“I don’t know what you mean, James,” you giggle.

“But I love you too, doll,” he chuckles, pressing his lips on yours again to make you shut up and feel you as close as possible in that moment. He feels complete and comfortable now, being with his girl, the one he loves more than everyone, the one who loved him even when he was the Winter Soldier.

Taglist: @nicoline1998enilocin | @sergeantbarnessdoll | @km-ffluv | @kandis-mom | @lives-in-midgard | @bucky-barnes-lover | @felicitylemon | @sweater-bee | @identity2212 | @cjand10 | @bookishtheaterlover7 | @harleycao | @buckyalpine (I tag you here because I can’t find the post where you asked for angst oneshots)

[ciderjacks]

ok I mentioned this earlier and people were sort of confused but I’m gonna try to explain why I think the long AND short lifespan issues were resolved by the end of dungeon meshi. WARNING: DUNMESHI SPOILERS AHEAD

-

Part 1: the lifespans aren’t natural

ok so I’m gonna start with that no I don’t think Marcille got her wish, at least not the way she wanted. Marcille wanted to bend the rules of nature so everyone would live an unnaturally long time. However, the lifespans that the races in dungeon meshi have (besides tall-men, but I’ll get to that later) are also not natural. They only had those lifespans because the winged lion was maintaining that lifespan for their race.

You can see at least 3 different races here that are asking for different life spans, what they’re asking for lines up with what the lifespans are.

the dwarf asked for immortality, the elf asked specifically for a thousand year life, the half foot heard this and said that was too long, and to make it shorter. The only ones who didn’t ask for a lifespan alteration were the (would be) tall-men. The lifespans aren’t natural, they’re caused by the demons magic…

part 2: so what of the demons magic?

This is I think the most explicit statement, that the demons magic, every wish the demon granted, is lost. This includes lifespans, one of the oldest wishes it granted. And I wanna highlight one thing she says specifically. “We have the luxury of time”. I don’t think that means a long life, I think it means the opposite. The narrative regards these lifespans as unnatural, destructive and soul sucking. The immortal townspeople are cursed, time doesn’t matter to them, and so they have no desires, or drive to continue. This is depicted by them finding food flavourless.

and when they no longer have immortality look at how they think of food. That is the luxury of time, not to avoid it, but to experience it. This is what the “long-lived” races must learn in the absence of the demon, now lacking the extra hundreds of years the demon had gifted them. That’s why it’s important that Marcille didn’t get her wish the way she wanted, because she wanted everyone to live forever. And speaking of Marcille’s wish.

She says she’s learned to embrace death, and not because of anything the demon did. She wanted to live forever with her friends, she didn’t want to confront death. With the demons magic gone, she no longer has the extra thousand years. She’s learning to accept her friends mortality, yes, but she’s also learning to accept her own.

part 3: the theme of accepting death

Like I said earlier, Marcille is afraid of death. So is Delgal/Yaad. The end of the story resolves their acceptance around death and dying. As much as Marcille wanted everyone else to live, there’s a reason she decided everyone should just live a thousand years. She doesn’t want to sacrifice her own lifespan, she wants infinite time with the people she loves. In the aftermath of the winged lion, she instead gets a much shorter amount of time. Delgal/Yaad is similar, in that he feared death. He says he was afraid of dying and losing everything, but now he’s ok with that reality, because the reality of an extended or eternal life was much worse.

part 4: the curse of living and the curse of living too long

To desire is to eat is to live. Our most primal instincts. The long lived races, while not immortal and desire-less, had an unnatural amount of time on their hands. They were able to forego their humanity because they’d been gifted all the time they wanted, which lead to fighting and oppression of the short lived races (which is why it’s important for Laios to be the king, even though the elves and dwarves have lost the demons magic. Their mindset at that point in time, is of people with too much time on their hands.)

When Falin speaks to the demon, stripped of all his desire, he describes living as cruel. From his perspective, humans have a limited time and a constant desire, sorrow and anxiety pressing at them. Yet, Falin says it’s delicious. The fear inherent to living is natural, it’s what makes life interesting, and so it’s thematically important that the magic allowing certain races to avoid this reality isn’t maintained. Marcille’s wish was based in truth, it was how she went about it that was wrong.

Part 5: the end of the racial power dynamic

Obviously the races and cultures are still different, they were different before the winged lion began granting wishes, and will remain different, however what the narrative tells us again and again is that the lifespans are equivalent to a power structure. Elves and dwarves are at the top, because they were granted long lives. This power structure is explicitly not natural, it’s not how the races should be, Ryoko Kui emphasizes this several times. So given this, I think it’s really important that at the end, when the demons magic is gone, all the races become one unit. There is no more power structure, is what this implies. One of humanities oldest desires, the desire to live eternally, is undone.

Ryoko Kui wanted to show that the racism and the power structures weren’t logical, and they weren’t natural, and now the people will have to navigate without those, without differences of lifespan, and without the ability to push away death.

part 6: conclusion

“Surely your kind exists for no reason but to starve” = “you exist for no reason but to die”

as Laios literally consumes life force itself, destroying the demon and destroying its magic. After he does this, the races are portrayed as one unit. The elves say that while magic isn’t gone, the demon’s and what came with it is, and that things will be different from thereon-out.

magic will continue to exist, but its been effectively reset, or unraveled, by the death of the demon.

the ability to live hundreds of years is lost, and while the winged lion, an eternal creature, thinks of this as a curse, to humans it’s a secret blessing. The impact of time is what keeps us going.

The structures set up by the ancient lifespan wishes are also undone. No race should get to live longer than any other, humans shouldn’t have unnatural structures like that. It disrupts the natural flow of living. Thats the resolution to the lifespan issue. Not “Marcille has to accept that she’s going to live an unnaturally long life”, but “Marcille has to accept that no one should have that much time, including her”. That’s why I think the lifespan issue is resolved when the demon dies. Thanks for reading, if you managed to read all of this.

[lovebugism]

I positively adore steeb and shy!reader 🥹 can I please request steve comforting shy!reader after her first experience with the upside down? he just vows to take care of her?

ty for requesting!! — steve takes care of you when you won't let anyone touch you after fighting vecna (shy!fem!r, hurt/comfort, friends in love, cw for mentions of bruises/injuries, 0.9k)

Hawkins Memorial Hospital smells overwhelmingly of bleach and very faintly of copper. You think the last bit might just be you, though. The scent of metallic blood and alternate-dimension muck hasn’t quite left you — even though you’ve scrubbed yourself raw in the shower, three times over.

You sit in Max’s vacant room while she’s out for surgery. Everyone else is either sleeping off the grief or getting themselves checked out. You can’t do either — too plagued by nightmares and too frightened at what the doctors might find if they look at you too close.

Steve finds you in the dim room, lit only by natural sunlight, standing in front of the small square mirror against the wall. You get lost in the splotchy bruises on your face until he knocks gently on the cracked open door. 

“Hey…” he greets, gently to keep from startling you.

You swallow down the fleeting panic. “Oh. Hi.”

“I, uh, I brought you some ice,” he tells you and steps further into the room, waving a plastic bag of chipped ice in his hand. “I saw you flinch when you wrapped up Dustin’s ankle. I figured your shoulder was bothering you…”

He’s visibly shy, but you’re impossibly shier. The deafening quiet and the proximity of your bodies are equally suffocating. You cower beneath the weight of it, wringing your clammy, cut-up hands together. “I’m— I’m fine. Thanks…”

Steve flashes you a wavering smile, lopsided and perfectly pink. He forces a laugh through an aching chest because you haven’t talked about what happened since you got back. He figured it was normal at first — that you were still grappling with the whole fighting monsters thing, but you haven’t let anyone touch you in days. The doctors have been begging to look you over since you got here.

“I just… I wanna help,” he confesses.

A pleading look swims in the deep honey of his eyes. It becomes impossible to turn him down. You’d have an easier time fighting Vecna, you think.

You swallow hard. “It’s… It’s my back,” you shrug, then grimace when the movement makes you ache.

You’d fallen through the decrepit floor of the Creel house and landed hard in the basement. The vines slithering there broke your fall. For the most part, anyway. The damn things would have swallowed you whole if Steve hadn’t been brave enough to jump in after you. 

“Can I see?” he wonders.

You hesitate for a moment. “I haven’t really— looked at it yet,” you murmur with a pained look twisting your features. You turn around when Steve approaches you. You feel his warm fingers along your back, knuckles skimming over your skin as he lifts your shirt with a slow and gentle touch — giving you ample time to stop him if you wanted.

When you don’t, he raises the fabric to the middle of your spine. The entire canvas of your back is darkened with a hardly healing bruise. The sight of it makes him grimace. “Jeez…” he mumbles before he means to.

Your brows pinch. “Is it bad?”

“We’re gonna need a lot more ice,” he answers with a forced laugh.

You giggle at his half-joke. The pretty sound makes him smile.

“You should probably see a doctor—”

“No,” you interject with a firm shake of your head, sterner than he’s ever seen you.

“But it’s— It’s kinda gnarly—”

“I’m fine,” you insist, despite the bruises darkening your skin. You turn back around to face him and avert your gaze at the pitiful look he gives you. You cross your arms over your chest and bite back a wince. “I’m okay, Steve. There’s other people to worry about right now.”

Max, for one. And all the rest of the kids for another. And the rest of the town who lost something in the earthquakes. You got off pretty lucky, all things considered — just a couple of bruises. And a cut or two. And some pretty gnarly nightmares. But that’s it.

Steve’s lip quirks in a sympathetic smile. “Here. C’mon. Sit down.”

He urges you to the made-up hospital bed with a hand hovering over your lower back. Your perch on the side of it, one leg curled beneath you, as Steve slides in behind you. He raises the hem of your shirt and presses the icepack against your shoulder blade, where the bruises seem darkest. His touch is gentle and feather-light, almost comically so. The bag of ice just barely grazes you.

“Is this okay?” he asks.

You nod. “Yeah… Thanks.”

His hand grows heavier when his touch becomes more confident. The stinging of the cold soothes the deep ache in your shoulder.

“No problem,” he says before swallowing down the nerves crawling up his throat. “I’m always here, you know? If you ever need anything.”

You exhale a sharp laugh through your nose. “I feel like you have better things to do than take care of me,” you murmur, wringing your hands into a knot in your lap.

“Well, I don’t.”

“I find that hard to believe.”

“What?” he scoffs. “That I’d rather dote on you than do anything else?”

“Yeah,” you laugh and shoot him a playful look over your shoulder. You smile when you find him already grinning at you.

“Well, believe it, alright? ‘Cause you’re stuck with me now.”

“Am I?”

“Yep,” he answers, popping the p.

“We fought monsters together, and now we’re bonded for life?”

“Exactly.”

You flash him another glance, eyes glittering as you bite back a beaming grin. “Sounds miserable,” you tease.

Steve nods with a crooked smile. “Absolutely horrible.” 

[haikyu-mp4]

When in Rome

word count; 2392 – f!reader

Moving to Italy as a young adult to work as an au pair through a shady website wasn’t the most reckless thing anyone your age ever did. However, you hadn’t counted on the job being a complete lie and ending up stranded at the airport with nowhere to go.

You strolled over to the large notice board by the taxi section where people promoted anything the tourists might not want to miss. Your eyes skimmed over a few places to eat and cheap Airbnbs, and you sighed loudly until your eyes zeroed in on a laminated note.

‘Professional athlete needs an in-house cleaner and language teacher’ it said in Italian, and you had never been so thankful for taking all those language courses prior to this.

Hurriedly, you called the number and were greeted by an older man’s voice claiming to be a manager for Ali Roma, whatever that meant. You claimed to have experience in anything he asked and responded just quickly enough in Italian that you got the job.

By the time evening rolled around, you were sitting by the wall and leaning on your suitcase. The manager needed time to produce a contract and send it to your e-mail. Thank goodness for airport wifi. You had the contract open on your phone and quickly skimmed through it until you found the section where you would be living in an adjacent apartment by his house, before immediately completing the e-signature.

When you got there for the first time, that manager had been waiting in your new apartment to greet you and go over some details, also making sure you were who you said you were and then introducing you to Kageyama Tobio.

He was interesting, that Kageyama. Not as old as you might have imagined, and ridiculously handsome. Seemingly shy but not against having company. Kind but very direct.

It had been a long day of cleaning, which was the kind of manual labour your body wasn’t so used to performing yet. Finally off work for the day, you were singing to yourself over the stove, trying to read something off a food label when a dark head of hair appeared in your peripheral vision. Jumping in surprise, you held up the pasta packet as if to throw it, only to see Kageyama’s upper body leaning into the doorway with a curious wiggle of his nose. “Kageyama, you scared me.”

“I’m sorry.” The sauce was still cooking as you had forgotten to put on the pasta for boiling, so it would have to simmer for longer, but the smell must have wafted far enough to draw him in. “Did you make that?”

You proudly flourished your hands over the food. “I sure did,” you picked up some sauce on a spoon, holding it up for him with a hand underneath. “Wanna taste?”

The two of you spoke to each other slowly in Italian, adding some English words here and there. “Yes,” he confirmed, coming into the kitchen and walking straight over to you. You expected him to take the spoon from you, but your ears burned red as he leaned in close and ate the sauce right off the spoon. He seemed to consider the taste while all you could do was try to stay focused with him so close. Finally, he nodded and looked at you. “It’s really good, can I have some too?”

Luckily you had made a lot, intending to save some portions for later, so you spent the evening eating with Tobio – he insisted you call him Tobio – in the setting Italy sun.

Tobio had a lot of practices and seemed to stay longer than planned almost every time, so you would typically have a cup of tea and lounge on his couch, which was much more lavish than yours until you heard the door unlock. The general idea was for you to clean while he was out, so when he stayed longer than what it said in the schedule, you happily enjoyed the quiet luxury of his living room or the heat of Italy from his balcony after finishing the obligatory work. Then when he got home, you would often make dinner, which was not part of the original plan but naturally became part of the routine.

He was funny, in his own way, and the way you both laughed so quietly sat well with you as the sound of the busy city flowed through the open windows in the background.

Over the first weekend, you had done your best to prepare some learning materials that would suit his level, and you two would mostly use conversing as a way of learning, spending a few hours every Saturday. Whenever he hit a word he didn’t know in Italian, he would awkwardly move his hands in the air and look at you for help.

And sometimes, you weren’t sure either. “Oh… I don’t know that, actually,” you admitted, feeling your ears burn red as he was still staring at you expectantly. You chuckled under your breath to relieve the tension and opened up your computer to look it up. When you finally found it, you looked up, only to realise he had scooted closer on the couch to look at the screen too, not noticing how you took in a sharp breath of air at how your arms brushed against each other.

He nodded, seemingly happy with the answer as he tried to say it out loud. “Chiacchierare.”

You repeated it back to him with emphasis on where he struggled with pronouncing it. “Chiacchierare.”

And when you focused back on his face, he was staring at your lips, probably because you were teaching him pronunciation, but it still made you feel flustered. He repeated the word more properly, until he looked back up at your eyes, expectantly again.

“That was… good.” You cleared your throat and glanced at the wall clock before turning back to him. “Did you already go for your jog today?”

Tobio looked at his wristwatch and seemed to frown. “I would rather go later, it’s still pretty hot outside,” he said, getting up and walking into his kitchen now that it seemed you wanted a break. “Do you want anything to drink?”

“Just water, please!” You started packing up the teaching materials you always had lying around for the basic rules when Tobio came back in with two tall glasses of ice water.

“We’re done for the day?” he asked, and your heart skipped a beat at the disappointed look he wore.

“I just thought…” You drifted off because you weren’t sure what you thought. He just looked so ridiculously handsome in his leisure wear, and when he scooted closer, he smelled so good, and…

“Maybe we can do something else?” he asked, putting the glasses down without any coasters, so you added one underneath each glass. “Like go swimming?”

Tobio started asking you to do more things with him that couldn’t be considered something you weaved into the routine of your job. They were more like… dates. He would take you mini golfing, hiking or to a volleyball court, and then always buy you dinner wherever you wanted to try eating next. Whether it was some exclusive local restaurant or in the next town over, he would get you there.

Obviously, you knew what this might look like, what it might be becoming, but bringing it up brought on the risk of bursting the bubble. You were still keeping up with all the work they expected from you, and your time together never affected his practices or other work routines.

You fell in love with Kageyama Tobio and he fell in love with you.

A right person, right time kind of love.

It was the most casual evening you finally gave in to it. You were in your own kitchen, once again humming under your breath as you cooked, Italian tunes playing from the radio.

The sunshine came through the windows and lit up the room, alerting you when Kageyama’s shadow crept in. “Hello, there.” You looked up at him and smiled softly, stirring the pasta sauce that had a much better recipe now than it did when you first arrived. Speaking with the locals and making friends outside of work hadn’t been easy, but you got there.

“Hi.” He walked closer until he stood arm to arm with you, picking up the ladle to unnecessarily stir the pasta while you worked the sauce. His hair was damp, telling you he just got out of the shower after practice. “How was your day?”

“Very relaxing, video called my parents and went to the old neighbour for lunch,” you recalled. “She told me to bring you next time, said it’s been too long.” You bumped him with your elbow and he smiled, doing the same back. He didn’t need to know said neighbour referred to Tobio as your partner. “And you? How was practice?”

You couldn’t help but glance at him when he pouted. “It was fine, but I had some trouble with my serves.”

“Serves?” you repeated. “Were you trying something new?”

“Not really, just… had my mind on something else, I suppose.”

You hummed in understanding, then the Italian tunes took over the aura again as you finished the food, putting both the pot and pan on the cold parts of the stovetop.

You both slowed to a stop and seemed to be waiting for the other to choose your next move. In the end, you would never be able to tell anyone the answer to who moved first, because it only took a second for the two of you to be devouring each other.

Tobio had one hand on the back of your head, the other hand splayed across the middle of your back to pull you closer. Your arms clung to his shoulders to make sure he was actually there with you.

Your lips moved in perfect sync, and then either of you interrupted the flow with a different tangent in irregular intervals before naturally syncing back into each other’s pace.

By the time you two snuck back out of the bedroom that night, the pasta was cold, and he kissed you against the kitchen counter as it heated back up.

This routine you had been trying to piece together eventually blurred into your day-to-day life. Tobio would go to practice when he needed to, and on the days he stayed late, you were sometimes already snoring away in his bed, or sometimes waiting for him with a cup of tea by the time he returned. While he was out, you always cleaned the house, enjoying how it visibly turned into a home for two. Your clothes from yesterday needed to be thrown into the laundry because Tobio had made quick work of them before bed and his finished protein cup was left on the table in the dining room because he didn’t have time for everything in the morning. Every little thing made you smile.

You two eventually spoke almost exclusively in Italian, leaning affectionately on each other while searching up any words you didn’t remember. The neighbours loved you, and you even hosted a dinner for some of the local couples you spent time with.

“Y/n?” you heard called from the hallway. You sat on the sofa with Tobio’s iPad and browsed open positions in the area or online. Even though Tobio said you didn’t need to work to be with him, you wanted something to give your life some extra colour. Something like working with children or teaching language to people of all ages interested you greatly.

“Tobi?” you responded, lifting one arm to let him settle his head in your lap, letting your arm fall back over him while still scrolling.

“Let it go for today. We still haven’t talked to my manager about ending the contract,” he mumbled, closing his eyes to rest. He had early practice today, which left him plenty of quality time that you should be spending on giving him your attention!

You chuckled airily. “Did you do well at practice today?”

“Very well,” he confirmed, giving you that stiff smile that made you laugh more and think of the high school photos he had shown you before. “Hinata will be here in a week, we should settle everything with my manager by then so I don’t have to explain it to him. He’s not very smart.”

As your fingers stroked through his hair, you put the iPad to the side after locking it. “I’ll do it tomorrow,” you said. “For now-“ Tobio opened one eye to watch you, finding a coy smile. “Tell me what you’ll introduce me to Hinata as.”

He wasn’t sure how to take your tone. Was this relaxed attitude real or were you just waiting for him to say the wrong answer? “You’re my- Uhh… I can’t say girlfriend?” he asked and felt some relief at how a bigger smile stretched across your face. Then you leaned over to squish his face and push your lips against his in several small but loving kisses.

“Of course you can!”

“Tobio?” you yelled when you walked out of the kitchen to greet him at the door. He wasn’t supposed to be home for another ten minutes according to his last message, so you were curious about who else would just walk right in.

You stopped abruptly in the hallway as you saw his manager, staring at you with furrowed brows. You looked down at your bare legs and Kageyama’s hoodie, then back up in horror.

“I was going to ask if you know who Kageyama is seeing.” A silence fell over you where you did whatever you could to not meet his eyes. The heat crept up your neck and over your cheekbones. “But never mind!”

You would both later agree on ending the contract early, as Kageyama wouldn’t need your services anymore in the same way and you wouldn’t need to use the adjacent apartment.

Instead, he would save up some of that money he could have paid you with to buy you the kind of engagement ring that best suited your style.

Tobio wanted to spend the rest of his life with you. You were the right person, and it was the right time.

masterlist

[gb-patch]

I don't mean to be rude about it because maybe I'm misunderstanding, but maybe I can understand better.

You're saying that as long as someone is a POC or LGBT it's okay to change how a character looks and sexual identity/gender identity, but if they're white and straight it's bad?

I'm from a family of immigrants, but we are widely considered white. It would feel wrong if someone changed a character from my ethnic background because there are experiences that are unique to us...Or like I'm bisexual. If there were a character that were changed from that to gay and/or trans that feels wrong. If a character is made a certain way, I believe that they should stay true to that... Idk if I'm misunderstanding, but on the surface this feels hypocritical?

Well, I’m glad you’re not trying to be rude. But I’m afraid one of the most frustrating things to deal with is people not wanting to consider reality. Here is why I don’t believe it is hypocritical- majority groups who oppress minorities fucking exist. They make people’s lives so much harder than they should have to be. If you don’t wanna use your mind to figure out who they are and instead try to use concepts like “what about my culture, huh” or “what about potential representation issues among minority groups, hmm” as a way to believe it's all a wash, that’s your choice. But I don’t agree and feel like I shouldn’t have to explain again. I’ll do it anyway, though.

I live in the US, my game is set in the US, most of our players are in the US. That’s the culture and situation I’m talking about. And if you live in a place where some people have 90% and have only given up 10% while kicking and screaming about it, don’t say being fair is tell those with 10% to respect the 90% ‘cause whatever people create now, in today’s world, is what should be defended without consideration because I guess everything is perfect as it is. Nuance existing in some situations doesn’t actually change this point for me.

I won’t be answering other asks about this. I’m not going to tackle whatever mental gymnastics people come up with to try to make this matter Even Stevens across the board. You will not change my mind and I won't make excuses for this belief.

[marksbear2]

Hii I was wondering if you would write for TASM peter. Also would you write the smut ABC's for any characters because I haven't seen one for him and I'd love to see it (specifically from nwh for this)

PETER PARKER X MALE READER

This is my first time ever writing one of these!! Uhm so I’m still struggling with my mental health and stuff but I promised that I’ll be back before the 23rd so here I am!

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Very shocked but like in the goofy awkward way. He likes to cuddle and hold you close while smiling ear to ear. He likes to tell you his favorite things you did.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

He likes his hands, to hold and grip you close and close with him. He likes your arms the way you hold him tightly and he likes seeing your arms flex, also your back.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He likes facials, both receiving and giving them. He’s let you shoot your cum on his face and especially when he wears his glasses.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He wouldn’t mind doing it somewhere publicly but safe. Like in the bathroom stall during school or alone at night in the park.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

None, the only experience he has was watching porn. Lmao.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Missionary or mating press, anything that you two are close enough to make eye contact and to kiss.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

At first when you two just start out having sex he’ll let out nervous chuckles. But as you two get closer he’ll crack a joke here and there while moaning.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He’s not that wildly bushy but he is hairy, but it’s neat and sometimes trimmed. But on some occasion yes he is bushy.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Completely focused on you like he’s in a trance, nothing else crosses his mind only you. He wants to see you and be close with you.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He jerks off pretty often, whenever you two are alone but too tired to have sex you’ll two will jerk one another off, maybe edging to.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

He loves roleplaying, you or him could wear his Spider-Man suit while the other would be a fan or villain. Or other roleplays like jock and nerd.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

His or your room, or the living room on the couch. He can get off doing literally anywhere so

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Hearing you say his name, hearing his name roll off your tongue, he’ll already be ready for the next round it doesn’t matter who’s the top.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Someone watching or like being cucked. He would literally crash out because he thinks the thought of s someone watching is embarrassing but someone actually wanting to have sex with you makes him wanna commit.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He loves giving head, he’ll be under the table or blanket sucking you off until your dick literally can’t cum anynore.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Depends on the moment, when you two both are okay and happy he would fuck you or take it in a fast but deep pace but when you two aren’t okay he likes to take it slow as deep but very gentle.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He actually likes quickies, he would try to get off as fast as he could. You two probably do it moe often then most would.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

He’s willingly to take risk and try out new things no matter how confusing or scary it’ll be. He has an ‘You only live once’ type of mindset.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Four maybe six, he can take a lot even if your extremely rough with him. But after a long and hard rough day of hero work maybe only one round.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He owns rope and such, it’s for either of you two be tied up he doesn’t really care. Sometimes he’d use his web slinger to tie you up onto something so it’s sturdy.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

He likes to tease, he’ll give you flirty signals and winks and make innocent things like drinking water seem dirty.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He’s pretty loud, he whines and moans while he gasps a lot.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Whenever he’s super exhausted he would cockwarm you, you could softly thrust into him or not and just hold and cuddle him.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

He’s one of those skinny guys with a expressive dick. He’s about 5’4 inches when he’s soft and an solid 8 in when he’s hard. He’s an real grower.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

He’s very horny, he’s not a pervert or anything but when your in the mood he’ll be in the mood to. He’s buzzing with easy arousal.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

It takes him a while to fall asleep because he’s just yapping about how much he likes having sex with you and such but when you two are finally getting quiet he’ll drift to sleep in your arms.

THE END

[signanothername]

saw your recent post about Nightmare's room for Dream, and it reminded me of a fic, where due to Dream still physically and mentally being 6 in the stone, Nightmare was preparing for what to do now as the 'older brother'

which made me wonder

I'm betting Ink or someone from the Omega Timeline found Dream first when he was freed from the statue

What would've happened had it been Nightmare? When faced with this small six year old who is nothing like he remembers, would Nightmare's true self and corruption be mentally first fighting on what the hell to do?(The mental image of this is a bit comical)

Aw that’s adorable dhhxhxhxh

So funny enough, I kinda already made 2 comics that explored what Nightmare’s reaction will be to a small 6 y/o Dream before, just under completely different circumstances

But here’s the thing, while i have explained before how Nightmare’s corruption works in my eyes, I don’t think I was really clear in my explanations, so I’m taking your ask as an excuse to explain it better >:) (i’ll get back to your main question I promise hdhdhdh i just wanna help you connect some dots when it comes to Nightmare’s behavior)

So something to keep in mind is how Nightmare’s mind isn’t truly strong enough to fight off his corruption/corrupted thoughts from controlling him and guiding his actions, and while Nightmare is in absolute control of his mind, his corruption has shaped it in its own twisted way, that’s why he’s an absolute fucking bitch, that’s why Nightmare can be extremely cruel to those around him

Think of his corruption as a parasite, it feeds off Nightmare’s own pain and in turn it’s what makes Nightmare feel that pain (and his own emotions) magnified times a thousand

So when say a normal person who isn’t corrupted feels anger for example, they would feel that anger through stages from it being a mere mild frustration that turns to anger and then full blown rage (depending on the situation of course), but even then a normal person would be able to control that frustration so it doesn’t escalate to anger and in turn never turns to rage, or even if this person were to immediately jump to rage, then they’ll be able to calm themselves down by venting that anger a bit

Nightmare on the other hand,

A- doesn’t go through those stages for his emotions, he immediately experiences the most intense form of them

and

B- those feelings never go away, they linger and fester inside him like an infestation as it is what his own corruption feeds on

He feels angry? That anger is a full blown rage inside him, he feels sad? That’s crushing depression for him, he feels hate? That hate is nothing but raw loathing for everyone and everything around him, he feels fear? It’s fucking paralyzing to the point Nightmare seeks power so he won’t have to feel afraid, he feels happy? It’s tainted by his now sadistic behavior as Nightmare finds sick satisfaction and glee in hurting those around him

Of course, how he deals with that changes as he grows and learns and adapts, so such emotional intensity/ instability is extremely apparent on him as a newly corrupted 6 y/o who feels all alone and lost in the world while it shapes his personality and who he becomes as an adult with a lot more control over his actions/reactions (corruption + bad experiences that shapes his mind = Mean Girl Bitchmare)

What I’m trying to say is that his corruption contributes to his emotional instability, and that corruption knows what to feed on exactly, it makes it so Nightmare feels dependent on negativity so he won’t have to experience what it’s like to feel powerless again, it feeds on his fear, pain, anger, hatred and it extends to Nightmare’s sadistic cruel actions that in turn brings more negativity, which in turn makes him stronger and by extension the corruption stronger which contributes to magnifying his emotions even more, which leads to more cruelty and so on, it’s a never ending torturous cycle that no one is aware Nightmare’s in.. including Nightmare himself, Nightmare is as much of a victim to his corruption as those poor souls who have to deal with Nightmare cause of it

The corruption magnifies Nightmare’s emotions too much for his mind to even be able to process them let alone regulate them, (and Nightmare already has problems understanding his own emotions to begin with) and in turn that corruption only got to his mind as well

Imagine it this way, Nightmare’s mind is plagued by his now corrupted thoughts, he can’t truly think clearly through the thick suffocating corruption, trauma, and horrifying experience in his first 500 years of corruption, it’s like looking through a broken mirror, the pieces of the mirror are still there, and they still show his reflection, but they’re too distorted and messy to form a clean and clear reflection, Nightmare looks at himself in that mirror, but all he sees is scattered pieces of who he used to be (he can no loger recognize his reflection) and so as Nightmare keeps trying to put the pieces back together, it’s more and more clear that not only do they now show the reflection of he used to be, but also who’d he become, the shattered mirror pieces reflect both his corrupted and passive self in a distorted messy way (that’s who Nightmare is now)

Ok if that’s the case, how come Nightmare has kind moments that contradicts his own corrupted state of being? Cause despite his corruption, he’s still Nightmare, I can never emphasize that enough

Despite the cycle he’s in, despite the state of those shattered pieces of who he used to be, those pieces that has his passive self STILL EXIST alongside his corrupted pieces, Nightmare’s own mind, thoughts, emotions and identity beyond that corruption still linger inside him, even if if in a sort of a limbo state

Ok with that all in mind, what the fuck does that have to do with a 6 y/o Dream? Everything

Just like I showed in the comic before, Nightmare would be too blinded by his own pain and hatred (that’s magnified by his corruption) to actually slow down and realize that Dream is 1- literally still a 6 y/o in mental and physical capacity, and 2- is just as in much pain and with such as much trauma as he is

Nightmare hates Dream with a passion

But the thing is, as I showed in this comic here, apart of Nightmare still deeply cares about Dream, even when Nightmare’s in absolute denial about it, I dare say Nightmare doesn’t even realize how much that lil part of him cares

And that would reflect on how he deals with Dream, Nightmare would be conflicted alright, but his corruption would win first and foremost and as such, he’ll deal with Dream with cruelty (that he later realizes was a mistake)

I will not lie, I’ve yet to decide on what I love to think happened to Dream as a statue, but allow me to say that it’s one of 4 options, I like to believe it’s either

A- Nightmare kept him in Dreamtale beside the corpse of their mother

B- took Dream with him to his own castle where he kept him in a safe space

C- left him in a remote part of the multiverse in an empty universe devoid of life (which later got populated)

D- a combination between A and B and C in a linear timeline (i think option D is my fave so far, but I haven’t made a final decision yet :’D)

That being said, the moment Dream breaks out his stone prison, I believe Dream would be too confused and scared to understand what’s going on, hell, would probably think the Apple incident happened just yesterday, not that 500 years passed (you can imagine Dream’s shock later) only to start frantically searching for Nightmare and when he does find his twin? Nightmare doesn’t look like Nightmare anymore, where’s his golden crown? Where’s his tunic? Why is he so much taller? So many questions, and Nightmare’s not in the mood to answer

Nightmare would definitely be shocked to see Dream out of his prison, a big part of him hates that Dream escaped it, Dream doesn’t deserve to be free, another part of him (the one that cares) is relieved cause turning him to stone was never the plan, and then the more dangerous corrupted part of him is sadistically gleeful, he could finally get a proper payback and to have the golden apple from such a weak, small and helpless child

Dream would start talking about how he wants Nightmare back and you can imagine how pissed Nightmare would be at Dream’s daring audacity to bring up the apple incident

Their first interaction after Dream is finally freed is not at all pleasant (the fact Dream is still a 6 y/o physically and mentally doesn’t deter Nightmare’s cruelty)

Nightmare eventually realizes he should’ve been a lot more merciful on his twin when he first broke out his prison, yet that sadistic gleeful part of him can never be quelled (unbeknownst to Nightmare that the glee he feels at Dream’s misfortune is just his trauma shaped in a twisted manner due to his corruption, he feels like Dream hadn’t suffered like he had, so Nightmare will make Dream suffer himself)

And the rest is (kinda) history :)

[arcadia345]

Astro observations🌺

FYI I’m not a real astrologer, just my observations :) TW🔞

The cancer moon men I know are pretty chill and laid back + funny, but the women are so bitchy and moody😭 with a big sweet tooth

Every twin I know either has Gemini or Pisces placements

You ever meet someone and their neck just stands out for some reason added points if they smell good, most likely they’re a Taurus rising/ mars. Good example is Megan thee stallion her neck is so cute to me hehe

Aries in the chart can show you the things you were introduced to at a very young age, the early memories that you think of and say ‘That was wild lol’

3rd: could’ve started learning way before you started school(like flash cards and things) siblings and cousins, music, having access to electronics early

4th: erratic home life, the woman around you could be go getters

6th: could’ve got a lot of injuries when younger, probably couldn’t have a peaceful day even if you tried, bad experiences with animals

7th: domestic abuse, might have seen people having affairs, lots of disagreements between couples

12th:paranormal events, you could’ve had a lot of deja vu moments without even knowing, tend to have strong spiritual gifts,people having ill intentions towards you

Aquarius moon or degree/ moon in the 11th tend to have a “second mom” a person that treats them like their one of their own children, sometimes even better than their own mother does. 🌚

The people with mars in the first house I know have so many battle scars on their body

Moon/cancer in 3rd love changing their voices, and they have a bad habit of not telling the whole truth / white lies

Water sign on the descendent- people are always wondering what you’re up to, no matter how much you show them they’ll still wanna know what you’re hiding

Your first house correlates to how you came into this world, I have Chiron (ruled by Virgo) in my 12 conjunct my ascendant, uhm she said she almost d*ed having me😀 and I was a C-section baby. And the hospital did her so dirty(you know much they hate black women) they didn’t even stitch her back up correctly or drain her fluids and to this day she still has problems. The also gave her extra dosages of drugs just cause she’s a plus size woman- honestly I could go on and on but it really correlates with my cap rising and Neptune/Uranus in 1st

Mercury ☌ Sun, these people voices are just💋💋 they sound so sensual and unique ugh hard to explain it but 🥴 ex. Jungkook , Tupac

Gemini/ Libra in 2nd love collecting things like figurines makeup clothes candles plushies, could easily be a borderline hoarder tho

Ives noticed that sun in 10th have a strained relationship with their father, but their later years in life their relationship gets better, or not could really go either way, also could have money issues in their early years but ends up climbing the corporate ladder. It may take you a while to tho but just know it’ll be worth it in the end :) also they always stand out at their work place in some way, the coworker that you’re glad to see clock in at rush hour cause you know they gonna handle shit

Venus- mercury positive aspects love giving out nicknames to their favorite people 🥺if they’re always calling you cute names just know they really care about you lol

Sag moons and degrees have no chill😀 like calm down bae sag anything tbh🚬

9th house ruler in the 11th could go to the same college with their old friends or could become very popular in the area they’re in, I think they’d make good bloggers

Air signs or degrees in 5th are trend setters.

Aquarius you inspire people, they could take things and make it into their own like art

With gemini here people will “copy & paste” ur looks. But no matter what it just looks like a knockoff version of what you did lmao it just never look as good as yours

Libra here people are very opinionated on how you express yourself either in a good way or bad, neither less you guys get a lot of compliments on your style

Every time I see a Capricorn rising with Neptune in the 1st it’s like their skin is see through and fragile😯makes sense tho since caps rule the skin and Neptune fogs things up. A good example is Ariana Grande her skin looks so delicate

Pluto/Scorpio in the 11th/11th house ruler in 8th, your friends could hate each other🤺 also they could have a rough life/childhood, trauma bonding or just experiencing traumatic events together is common here

Chiron in Aries (honestly any Aries placements it just depends on where it is), most people didn’t pay attention to them in their childhood in some way so they learned to be independent because of their lack of support cardinal things fr

That’s all for today! Give me a follow if you enjoyed����

[wandaslittlebird]

Broken

Another cut segment of Her Special Girl Part 2! (Hopefully coming soon)

CW: Stepmom/stepdaughter, mention of strap on usage, sexual experimenting, shame, no explicit smut but still very much 18+

“Mama?” You asked, laid back against the headboard with Wanda’s head resting on your chest. The strap she’d just fucked you with was still nestled between your legs, resting sticky against your thigh. Neither of you had the energy to get up just yet, and you were more than happy to stay just like this until your stamina returned.

The night had been wonderful. You’d never felt more complete and satisfied in your life. Having Wanda inside you made you feel like the most important girl in the universe. She loved you. She took care of you. Everything was perfect.

Except your stomach tightened with a certain unshakable shame and embarrassment.

You hadn’t cum.

She had to have noticed, but she hadn’t mentioned it. Your mind swam with possibilities. She had to be disappointed, right? I mean she’d fucked you for over an hour, putting in so much hard work to make sure you felt good… all for nothing.

You weren’t sure why it hadn’t happened. You’d felt so wonderful the entire time. She had made you feel so good. But your orgasm simply never came.

“Yes, my little love?” She mumbled into your chest. She was practically collapsed against you from exhaustion. It had been a good long while since she’d fucked anyone like that.

“I did a good job, right? I was good?” You tried to keep your composure, but your voice came out far shakier than you were hoping. Your hand nervously played with her hair, braiding small bits of it at random.

She turned to the side, propping herself up on her elbow so she could see your face. “Of course you were, angel. You did wonderful. Mama’s so proud of you.” She wiped your hair from your face, cupping your cheek to force your avoidant eyes to meet hers.

“Even though I didn’t…”

She lifted her eyebrows, waiting for you to finish your question. She knew what you were trying to ask, of course. When you didn’t continue, she reached up and squeezed your hand. “Did you still enjoy yourself?”

“Yes! Yes I-“ You felt the need to reassure her she hadn’t done anything wrong. Whatever the problem was, it was with you. You’d felt fantastic. You weren’t sure why you hadn’t cum. Your nervous ramblings were cut off when you felt her hand gently squeeze yours again. 

“Then that’s all that matters, honey,” Wanda reassured, resting her head back on your chest. “I enjoyed myself, too.”

You looked back down at her, confused. “But I know you worked really hard and I… I don’t wanna make you feel bad.”

She rubbed her hands up and down your hips in a calming motion. “I don’t feel bad, love. You were doing so good for me, telling me how much you loved me and how much you were enjoying yourself. I wasn’t doing this to make you cum, honey. I was doing this to make you feel good.”

You took a deep breath, still anxiously fiddling. You trusted her, that she wasn’t upset, but you couldn’t shake the feeling there was something wrong with you.

As if she could read your thoughts she knelt over you, straddling you on either side. You could feel the toy pressing against your stomach as she reached for your cheek again.

“You aren’t broken, detka,” she stated simply. Tears unexpectedly pricked your eyes at her words. She wiped them away with her thumb. “You don’t have to cum every time, sweetie. It’s okay.”

“But this time was special, and I really wanted to show you I was enjoying myself and… and I just don’t understand!” You cried.

“Sometimes our bodies react in ways we don’t expect,” she explained. “And each and every body is different. Some things that work for other people might not work for you. But that’s okay. I’m here to learn all about your body, and what it needs for you to feel the best it possibly can. It’s not a failure for either of us that you didn’t cum, sweetheart. It wasn’t a failure at all because we learned about a new way to make your body feel good.”

You nodded in understanding, so relieved she didn’t think you were broken or that there was something wrong with you. “So we can do it again?”

She laughed and kissed your forehead. “Of course honey. And next time we can use the vibrator if you want. I bet that will make you feel even better.”

You smiled. You were so glad you had her with you, on this journey to discovering your own pleasure. You wanted more than anything to learn what made her feel good, and it made your heart swell to think she wanted to do the same.

She collapsed against your chest again, peppering kisses across your bare skin. “And for the record,” she teased seductively, “I think I came enough for the both of us.”

[pinkhoodi]

love island !

✎ᝰ — hcs on how the bat boys (and wally :p) would act on love island

♡⃕ — bruce wayne, dick grayson, jason todd, wally west x reader

♡⃕ — genre + warnings: fluff, fluff, and more fluff <3

♡⃕ — a/n: who do yall think would be the best male islander ? I’m voting wally or jason 🧏🏽‍♀️

꒰ BRUCE WAYNE ꒱

Ꮺ bruce is here for one goal and one goal only, to find true love and he’ll use love island as his opportunity !!!

Ꮺ at first bruce thought it was a silly idea to go on a reality show to find love but then watching a season (or two), he realized that it might be just what he needs. a vacation in fiji where there’s no communication to the outside world and the only thing to focus on is the villa

Ꮺ I would see bruce as the bombshell everyone and I mean everyone is in love or jealous with. his introduction is smooth, his manners compliment him well, and the eye contact he makes with the girls have them heating up in the face. he would be an early on bombshell, maybe the end of week one so a lot of people consider him as an honorary og islander

Ꮺ bruce usually ends up making connections and then they wither away. he doesn’t understand why and it does start to frustrate him, he tries his best to grow a connection but he genuinely can’t seem to do it

Ꮺ thankfully, he’s grown some friendships that keeps him motivated and reminds him that there is a potential someone out there for him :)

Ꮺ buttt once he does, he’s stuck to his couple like glue and rarely leaves their side. he is there giggling and chatting with the person day in and day out, his experience in the villa swiftly changes once this person comes in

Ꮺ now casa amor…bruce is nawt playing any and I mean ANY games with casa !!! yes the reason for casa kind of makes sense but he doesn’t wanna indulge in the idea of hurting his couple or potentially damaging what he has built

Ꮺ bruce is someone who makes it to the final four and either wins or is definitely runner up. the results doesn’t phase him really since he feels like he found his person and someone he can grow to love <3

꒰ DICK GRAYSON ꒱

Ꮺ oh baby dick is here to have FUNNNNNNN. of course make some new connections but who is he to turn down a nice vacation on an island? with his busy and stressful schedule, he needs this vacation more than ever

Ꮺ dick would be an og islander and his path with finding love is what reeled in viewers. he’s done damn near every trope but oddly they don’t work in his favor :/

Ꮺ he realizes that most of the girls only get with him cause of his looks and his appeal which excited him at first but soon made him realize that these aren’t the connections he wanted. he wanted something genuine, something he could enjoy for the long run

Ꮺ I would think that he finds his love with one of the og members that he didn’t invest time in until later in the show. all his connections failed him except one and it was only labeled as a friendship until it sparked into something deeper in the last few weeks of his time in the villa

Ꮺ casa amor is what dick anticipated the most ngl, he was so ready to pack his bags and skip to casa. he wasn’t stressed about what was going on in the villa only cause he didn’t have any strong connections. I mean he brought a girl back but that didn’t last long

Ꮺ sadly dick didn’t make it to the final four and it kinda hurt him a little bit but he enjoyed the time while it lasted. also his connection with his person became stronger outside the villa and they eventually grew into a beautiful couple :)

꒰ JASON TODD ꒱

Ꮺ in jason’s head, he is here for a good time, not a long time. it became the complete opposite but that’s neither here nor there !!

Ꮺ jason just did it cause production reached out to him. how? the world may never know. however, he doesn’t regret accepting the offer cause he enjoyed it more than he thought and he met some incredible people who helped him grow as a person

Ꮺ I would say jason was a bombshell that came in about a week after the season started. He’s like an honorary og cast to the other islanders

Ꮺ sadly, jason was almost always at the bottom or vulnerable cause he couldn’t find the right connection. every girl or bombshell he connected with, something was missing, something that could complete him. though he did find it halfway through the season

Ꮺ a bombshell came through just last minute and he’s been stuck by their hip since. he was still open to new connections but this bombshell always reeled him back in, made him see what he was missing from his past connection. they’re kind to others, always laughing, and bring a soft yet joyful energy to the villa

Ꮺ now casa…ooo casa. at first jason did it only to see what the hype was about it but oh how he instantly regrets it. he acknowledged himself and made his presence with the casa girls but he instantly got the feeling that they were nothing like his connection back in the villa

Ꮺ did he do some things? ….sadly yes but immediately regret it the day after. in a “why the fuck did i do this? what is wrong with me?” type of regret. he felt even more regret when he returned to the villa and saw his couple feeling low and silently infuriated during the recoupling

Ꮺ he did own up to his actions and told them the entire thing that went down, not sugarcoating anything. also apologizing almost every time he saw them until they forgave him

Ꮺ he got into the final four and won :). viewers loved his storyline and loved the amount of growth he had throughout the show + the amount of fangirls he collected

꒰ WALLY WEST ꒱

Ꮺ thee actual lover boy in this villa and it’s so cute :(. he really came to love island for the right reasons and it’s so beautiful watching him fall in love and become a lovesick puppy around his couple

Ꮺ wally would be either an og member or a bombshell that came in after the third recoupling

Ꮺ he didn’t really think too much into it when he applied for the show. he wanted to have fun for the summer and see what this show could teach him, what didn’t expect was to have one of the most beautiful love stories everrr

Ꮺ wally’s connection weren’t too bad but for some reason he kept gravitating towards someone (you) and it would unintentional, he genuinely doesn’t know how it happens. he could be getting to know other people but still find himself under your arms, at ease and with his cheeks blushing red

Ꮺ not only that, he would always end up recoupling with them. he doesn’t understand why but he enjoys knowing how much you like him and how much he likes you

Ꮺ as time went on, he slowly stopped being interested in other people and only kept his attention on his couple. he realized after talking to the boys how he feels and they all joked about he might be falling in love, they were joking but wally felt a ping of nervousness about this “falling in love” but he couldn’t deny it to himself, even if he tried

Ꮺ wherever his couple is, there he is as well. even not in their absence, he leaves a small pout until they come back, he pretends that he wasn’t pouting beforehand but the entire villa snitched that he def was (he was so red, it was so cute but so embarrassing LMAO). he’s always smiling when talking about them, describing them with such beautiful adjectives, and all his recoupling speeches about them have the villa feeling like he was a yearning poet in his past life

Ꮺ casa….casa amor. he wasn’t too excited on the idea but the boys convinced him and he instantly regrets listening to them. the casa girls just didn’t feel right and he tried to keep all interactions on a friendship level, no matter how much the girls push themselves onto wally

Ꮺ he got all sappy and sort of become sad of not being with his couple. while his friends enjoyed, he kept them in the back of his head and wondered what they were doing in the villa. a lot of “I miss y/n” and “I wanna be with y/n”, he missed them so much to the point where he started counting down how many hours left in this casa

Ꮺ viewers loved how much wally has grown to love their couple and has showed more than minimum to be with them. even if he did had a few screw ups, he was more than sure to fix it and get back into their good graces, he can’t see them being hurt and he doesn’t wanna hurt them in anyway, shape, or form

Ꮺ I would say wally def came in second or third place. the prize really didn’t matter to him so he’s not phase by it, he’s just happy to meet someone this incredible on the island. after the show, him and his couple officially got together and ended up married years later <3

♡⃕ hey im looking for a girl in the villa. personality, any height, mrs right 😜

♡⃕ ngl, the only reason it took me song to get these out cause i was hooked on love island 🥸 (#TEAM SORDELL & TEAM KANA 🤞🏽)

♡⃕ who was yall fav islander ? yall better not say rob or aaron…

♡⃕ there is def gonna be a part two !!! I wanted to add kaldur and roy but I’m way too tired and my brain hurts rn :/

𝐕𝐎𝐓𝐏 💗: psalm 27:14

© 𝟤𝟢𝟤𝟦 𝗉𝗂𝗇𝗄𝗁𝗈𝗈𝖽𝗂. 𝖺𝗅𝗅 𝗋𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍𝗌 𝗋𝖾𝗌𝖾𝗋𝗏𝖾𝖽

[celandeline]

I'm thinking about Carl being insecure about his eye. y/n found a way to comfort him. Imagine what comic Lydia did, LOL. But just write whatever you like

i got a little carried away with this one, so it's going to be a two-parter (sorry)

also- comic Lydia sticking her tongue in his eye socket haunts me like the plague because i can't decide if it's disgusting, or i too, would do that given the opportunity

Believe Me

Carl Grimes X Reader [part two]

You always make a point to see Aaron off when he’s about to leave to go recruiting. You know that he can handle himself, that he’s done this a million times before, that Daryl would never leave him behind, even if things got sticky - but you never know. Coming back alive is never guaranteed. 

You hold his bag for him while he fumbles with the car keys until it unlocks. “You’re sure you don’t want to take anything else? Another water bottle? More protein bars?”

He turns around to take his pack from you with a smile. “We’re only going to be gone for two days, I think I’ll be alright with just this.”

The rumble of Daryls bike announces his presence before he rolls up beside the car, stopping. “Y’ready?” He gruffs. 

“Almost.” He tosses his bag into the passenger seat before turning to back to you with open arms. “Give me a hug.”

You squish yourself into his chest, and squeeze him as tight as you can. “Bye Dad. Be safe.” 

You feel him swallow, and hold you a little tighter. Calling him Dad is still a little new, and it makes him tear up a little more often than not. He’s not your biological father - no, your biological parents died years ago at this point - but he has become a father to you, ever since you started living with him and Eric. 

“You too.” He says, pulling back to look you in the eye. “And make sure Eric doesn’t try the stairs alone again please. He’s not as good at maneuvering in that boot as he thinks he is.”

You grin, and jokingly salute. “Yes sir.”

He slips into the driver's seat, and then he and Daryl are pulling away, heading towards the gates. You watch them go until they round the corner, and try to put your nerves to rest. The sound of plastic wheels on the sidewalk is a welcome distraction, and you turn around to see Carl pushing Judith along in the stroller.

He smiles when you turn around, and you return the gesture. “They’re going out again?” He asks, nodding in the direction your dad and Daryl went. 

“Yeah.” You say. “Only for a couple days this time, but you know.” You never really know when you’re coming back. If you’re coming back. 

He nods, and Judith gurgles happily in her stroller, reaching for the hem of your shirt. “You wanna join?” He asks. “M’ just taking her around the cul de sac before I bring her home for her nap.”

“Sure.” You say, welcoming the distraction from worrying about if this is the time that Aaron doesn’t come back. You fall into step beside Carl as he pushes the stroller along, following the sidewalk, passing by the houses of friends and neighbors. It’s quiet, the middle of the day with most of the adults at work - whatever that may be. It almost feels like you, Carl, and Judith are the only people in this whole town. 

“You think you’re gonna do that?” Carl asks. “Go recruiting with Aaron when they decide we’re old enough for real jobs?”

“I don’t know.” You say, honestly. “I mean, I guess I wouldn’t worry so much if I was with him, but then Eric would worry twice as much. And I don’t have a whole lot of experience out there - I was only on my own for a couple of months before Aaron found me and brought me here. You’d be good though,” You glance over at him. “I mean, you’ve got loads of experience out in the real world.”

He shakes his head. “Nah- I mean, yeah I’m experienced, but I don’t think they want the kid with the mangled face being the one to go make first impressions on new people.” He grins, halfheartedly joking, “Don’t want to scare ‘em off.”

“Huh?” You laugh, looking over at him. “What’re you talking about?”

He rolls his eye. “C’mon.” He says. “I know what I look like. Sending the ugly guy out there to try and recruit people probably isn’t the best image for our group.”

“Carl.” You say, brow furrowing. “Do you know what you look like?” You’re so confused - sure, he’s missing an eye, but he’s still the prettiest boy you’ve ever seen. The eye that he still has is the kind of blue that makes you think of the sky on a sunny day, and you’d kill for hair like his - long and silky and a dark brown that makes his blue eye stand out even more. He looks like a fairy tale prince. 

He glances at you. “You’re looking at me like I’m stupid.”

You laugh. “I mean how could you not be, when-” 

“Wow, thanks.” He snarks, cutting you off. 

“Shut up.” You say, knocking your shoulder into his. “I was trying to say that you’re the prettiest boy I’ve ever seen, before you interrupted me.”

You words hang in the air, and he looks steadfastly ahead. The only sounds are the plastic stroller wheels rolling on the sidewalk, and Judith’s occasional little noises. You can see a blush rising to his cheeks, and bite your lip to stop yourself from smiling, lest he think you’re making fun of him. 

“You’re just saying that ‘cause we’re friends, and you’re trying to be nice.” He says. 

“‘M not.” You insist. “It’s true - you’re really pretty, Carl.”

He still won’t look at you. “Half my face is just a hole.”

“Which just makes you look cool and badass.” You say, trying to peer around his curtain of hair to get him to look at you. He still won’t look at you, and the redness on his face has only gotten worse. “You still don’t believe me.”

He shakes his head, slowing as you reach the steps up to the porch of his house. He walks around to the front of the stroller to unbuckle Judith and lift her out of the seat. She slumps against his shoulder, obviously ready for her nap. “Um.” Carl looks down at the stroller. “Could you-?”

“Gotcha.” You say, folding up the stroller and carrying it up the porch steps after Carl. He opens the door and you follow him inside, gently kicking it shut behind you. “Where-?”

“Uh, we usually just leave it by the door.” He says over his shoulder as he starts up the stairs. “Let me just put her down-” He disappears around the bend in the landing, and you prop the folded stroller against the wall next to the door. You loiter at the bottom of the stairs until Carl appears at the top again, still a little pink. 

He comes down the steps and leads the way into the living room, towards the couch. You plop down onto the sofa, turned to face him next to you. “So-”

“Can we talk about something else?”

“No.” You grin. “Not until you believe me.”

He rolls his eye. “Fine. I believe you.”

“I mean really believe me.” You say. “What’s it going to take?”

“I don’t know.”

“Fine.” You say. “Where’s the nearest mirror?”

“Are you serious?”

“Yes.”

He pauses for a moment before responding. “I have one in my room.”

You get up from the couch and creep upstairs, careful to keep quiet so as to not wake Judith, Carl a reluctant half step behind you. He points you in the direction of his room, and you slip inside, holding the door open for him before shutting it quietly. The mirror isn’t anything special, just a rectangle of glass hanging above the dresser, but you grin at the sight of it anyway. 

Grabbing him by the shoulders, you steer him in front of the mirror, watching over his shoulder. “See?”

“Yup.” He says, unenthused. “I see this every day, actually.”

“Apparently not.” You say, moving a hand from his shoulder to gently play with his hair. “I mean, look at this.” You hold the lock up in front of his gaze. “Your hair is gorgeous. And-” You drop his hair in favor of softly holding his jaw, turning his head so that his jawline is more prominent. “This.” You run a finger along the line of his jaw. “This too.” You turn his head again so that you can sweep your touch over the bridge of his nose. “And of course,” You thumb over his cheek, tapping each of his freckles. Your hand still on his cheek, you grin at him in the mirror. “You’re blushing.”

“What are you doing?” He asks, soft. 

“Showing you.” You say. 

“Why?”

“Because you should know.” You say. “And it’s personally offensive when you say you’re ugly, because that means you think the guy I’ve been flirting with is a total dud.”

It takes him a minute to process it, and you can see it in his eye when he puts it together. “You’ve been flirting with me?”

“Maybe you are stupid.” You muse. 

You didn’t think it was possible, but he turns even more red. “I don’t- really? Me? Why?”

“Jesus Christ Carl, how far am I going to have to go before you believe that I like you.” You laugh. 

He makes eye contact with you through the mirror. “As far as you want.”

[nyanbin]

ღ infrunami — p.wb

10. papa's tteokbokkiria

꒰ EPISODE LENGTH ꒱ 3.1k words

꒰ AUTHOR’S NOTE ꒱ texts + tweets at the end! practically wrote a whole ass oneshot fic again cus im insane but theres more yn/wonbin interactions in this one i promise ^_^

← prev | masterlist | next →

𖦹 JUN. 14 (YEAR 1, SPRING) — 5:48 PM

THE YEARLY SPRING FESTIVAL AT SM UNIVERSITY takes place right before the beginning of the finals period of the spring semester, acting as a moment of respite and fun for students before the inevitable days of rigorous studying. It was your first year attending the festival as a student at the university, but you had sometimes visited when you were in high school, oftentimes with Eunseok in tow, so you were already somewhat familiar with how it worked and what kinds of things you could do there.

Unfortunately, in your case, you haven’t yet been able to experience the festivities, because you’d headed straight to the tteokbokki stand as soon as you’d arrived. The festival had already  been in full swing by the time you had gotten there with Shotaro and Eunseok, on account of all of your last classes of the day being in a building on the other side of campus. But while you actually did have just a little bit of time to look around before your shift, the two boys were oddly eager to send you off, reasoning that you should get there early so that Seunghan wouldn’t get in trouble. (As if they actually cared that much if he did.)

So, here you were, standing under the canopy tent of the photography club’s tteokbokki booth, longingly watching the passersby and listening to the lively music that you could hear playing from every corner of the festival. The girls who were on shift before you had eagerly left as soon as they'd finished explaining everything you needed to know about running the booth, and you were still waiting on Sohee to get there, so you were ultimately left to your own devices.

In the short time since you had arrived, there hadn’t been any customers, which you figured was because most people were currently at the amphitheater nearby watching the music performances. Once those ended, though, you anticipated that there would be a lot more people coming by. As you looked around for something to keep yourself busy in the meantime, you noticed that there were only a few of the canned drinks that the booth was also selling left at the front, so you decided to start by restocking those.

While hunched over the cooler and rummaging for the drinks, you hear the rustle of the tent flap moving aside behind you and assume it’s Sohee who had finally come to help you on the shift. You turn around to greet him, cans gathered in your arms, but his name dies in your throat when you make eye contact with Wonbin instead, who freezes while still ducked halfway underneath the tent. A dry laugh escapes you, and you already feel the aggravation rewiring your brain as if seeing Wonbin’s face had flipped the on-switch.

“What are you doing here?” you snark, narrowing your eyes at Wonbin, who looks to be as taken aback as you are.

He hesitates before stepping inside all the way, glancing around and then back at you. He’s stood firm on the opposite side of the tent as he crosses his arms. “I could say the same for you. Didn’t take you to be much of a photographer.”

You scoff. “I’m not in this club. Seunghan asked me to fill in for him.” While turning away from him to finish restocking the drinks, you continue, “You know if you wanna buy something, you have to go in front of the counter, not behind it, right?” 

”I’m not here to buy something,” he snaps, quick to react to your condescending tone. “Sohee… asked me to come here…” 

You turn to look at him as he suddenly sighs, seeming to realize something as he runs a hand through his hair. “For what?” you ask incredulously. “To work here?”

At his slow, weary nod, it dawns on you, too: this was a set-up. 

Immediately wanting out of this situation, you debated whether or not to call the two instigators and tell them to get their asses over here, but you decided that it was no use. If they had planned this, there was no way Seunghan and Sohee would come back to relieve you of your jobs. You imagined the two of them were frolicking around the festival at this very moment, their phones conveniently on do not disturb.

Resigned, you shake your head in disbelief, turning around to close the cooler with a little more force than needed. “Those idiots…”

You plant your hands on your hips, chewing on your lip, now beginning to dread the next two hours you’d have to spend with the boy you had been at odds with the past few weeks. You glance sideways at the culprit, who was currently peering curiously at the trays of tteokbokki. Wonbin had still not stepped that much away from the other side of the tent, as if he would die if he came within a five-foot radius of you. (Which, in truth, was definitely possible.)

After massaging your temples with a deep exhale, you speak up first. “Listen, I’m sure you’re absolutely loving this situation as much as I am, but I don’t wanna make these next two hours harder than they need to be. So let’s just get through this without fucking anything up, okay?”

Wonbin thinks about your words for a moment with his tongue in his cheek, as if trying to find a way to sneak in a taunting remark, but he instead shrugs as he says, “Fine by me.”

Thus, the first half hour or so of your cruel and unusual punishment mostly consisted of the two of you trying your best to avoid the other in the small space of the canopy tent. Business was still slow, so much time was spent sitting in the folding chairs or idly stirring the tteokbokki, trying to pay no mind to the other person. The only time a word would come out of either of your mouths was when a customer stopped by, attitude all of a sudden all cheerful as if the hostility radiating off the both of you wasn’t evident moments before. 

Once the performances at the amphitheater ended, though, this determination to not work with each other only proved to be detrimental. As you had anticipated earlier, many of the people filing back into the festival after the performances were hungry and looking for something to eat, resulting in a rush of customers at the tteokbokki stand. 

At first, the two of you still refused to properly communicate with each other. But with the way you were each handling the customers on your own, one by one, it quickly became disorienting, as the two of you frantically moved around each other, often getting confused on who had paid already or who was still waiting for something. It was obvious the two of you weren’t gonna last long if you kept this up; so, in a hurry to make things more efficient, you grab Wonbin by the shoulders, pushing him in front of the box of money acting as the cash register.

“You take care of that,” you say while moving to place yourself in front of the trays of tteokbokki, “and I’ll take care of this.” You only look at him briefly, tilting your head as if to say ‘Understand?’, before returning your focus back to the customer in front of you. Wonbin opens his mouth to argue, but decides against it with a shake of his head when he looks back at the growing line of customers.

Eventually, with this system, the two of you seemed to fall into a certain rhythm. Wonbin would take the orders, relaying them to you, and you would serve the food. Every now and then, you would take turns to restock as needed. Simple as that. Unsurprisingly, the rush was infinitely easier to handle now that you and Wonbin were working with each other rather than against each other.

After about an hour into your shift, the constant stream of customers had finally died down and you could finally take a breather. You plopped down into one of the folding chairs while dabbing at the small beads of sweat forming on your forehead from having to stand around the simmering trays of tteokbokki for so long. You slouched into your seat, shutting your eyes and pulling at your collar for some ventilation.

“Here,” you hear a voice say from above you. You open one eye to see Wonbin standing above you, arm outstretched and holding an ice-cold bottle of water towards you. Your stare shifts between the bottle and his face, baffled, before sitting up and hesitantly taking the bottle into your hands.

“Thanks,” you mutter, before taking a nice, long swig. 

Wonbin leans his weight on the table next to him, taking a drink out of his own water bottle. He clears his throat before asking, “Do you notice when you do that voice? Or is it, like, subconscious?”

“What?” You narrow your eyes at him. “What voice?”

“Like a… a customer service voice? When you’re talking to them, your voice kinda like… goes up an octave.” With a sly smile, he begins to mimic your voice in falsetto, the pitch raising an extra note at the end of each sentence. 

“Ugh,” you groan, rolling your eyes at him. “You’re insufferable, you know that?”

“I mean, you suffered through it, didn’t you?”

“Oh, I suffered, alright.”

You expect him to bite back with another taunt, but he relents, just letting out a short, amused laugh, one corner of his mouth lifting in a toothy smirk. You huff, glancing off to the side while wrinkling your eyebrows in annoyance, but, for whatever reason, you realized you didn’t feel as vexed as you wanted to seem. 

Behind Wonbin, you notice a customer walking up to the table. You quickly stood up to go help her on your own, relieved to not have to entertain Wonbin’s antics anymore. 

The customer was an older lady who seemed to be a visitor from off-campus. Already quite used to it at this point, you quickly take her order (during which you realized Wonbin was right about your “customer service voice”) and hand her her food. But instead of leaving, the woman just stands there looking down into the cup with a frown. You raise your eyebrows slightly as she says, “Is this all you’re gonna give me?”

“Sorry?”

“Look, at how much you put in here!” She tilts the cup towards you, jabbing a pointer finger at it. “I could barely feed an ant with this!”

You sigh inwardly, your hopes of not having to deal with any irrational customers here having been dashed. “Sorry, ma’am, but this is the same amount we give everybody.” 

“Well, for the amount I paid, you should be giving more! What is this, huh? A scam?”

Wonbin had turned his attention to the commotion as soon as he heard the woman complain. He was off to the side busying himself with the supplies, glancing at you every now and then as the situation unfolded. When he notices it was only escalating, though, and the woman continues to raise her voice at you, Wonbin decides to step in. “We could get you a new serving, if you like?” he offers.

The woman angrily waves her hand in dismissal. “Just so you could, what, charge me extra for it? Do you think I’m stupid?!”

“There’s no need to yell…” he murmurs in response, earning him a sharp glare from the woman.  You nudge his leg with your foot, signaling to him that it was okay, you had this under control, but he just stays put where he is.

“Ma’am, no one’s trying to scam you here,” you say as softly as you can manage. “If you really don’t want us to replace it, we can give you a refund and you can leave.”

She scowls even more, and you thought if she kept this up the frown would be permanently etched onto her face. “Ugh, you young people are so rude nowadays! Here, just take it back!”

All of a sudden, the woman flings the cup of tteokbokki at you, its trajectory headed straight for the middle of your shirt. Wonbin is quick to react, though, and is able to pull you back by the arm before it hits you, causing the paper cup to fall to the ground instead. Unluckily, some of the sauce still manages to get on your jeans and your shoes, and you wince slightly when you feel its heat seep through your clothes.

The woman clicks her tongue in contempt, looking you guys up and down with another scowl. She then storms off, likely off to find another booth and terrorize the next poor unpaid college student working there.

Wonbin watches her go, then says, indignation lacing his voice, “Holy shit. What the hell was her problem?” He looks down at you, only to realize his hand is still clinging to your forearm. He hurriedly detaches himself from you, suddenly interested in the empty wall of the tent as he sheepishly scratches the nape of his neck.

His awkwardness goes unnoticed by you as you pinch at your jeans to inspect the stain. With a sigh, you say to Wonbin, completely deadpan, “Wow. You saved my life, thanks.”

“Yeah, whatever,” he laughs in response as he moves to the extra supplies to grab a clean towel, then dousing it with water from his bottle. When he turns back to you, you’re crouched by the spill on the ground, picking up the stray pieces of rice cake with a paper towel.

“Here,” he says, handing the damp towel to you to wipe the stain on your clothes. You thank him as you stand, watching him as he takes over cleaning the mess on the ground.

“You’re, uh, good though, right?” Wonbin continues.

“Yeah. It’s fine,” you answer with a shrug. “Though, I will say I’m kinda disappointed you didn’t fight her in my honor like a gentleman.”

“Did you want me to punch an old lady in the face or something?”

“C’mon, she wasn’t that old.”

Wonbin had finished cleaning and disposing of the mess, and was now leaning back on the table behind him, weight shifted to his arms, studying you as you continued fervently wiping on the stain on your jeans and shoes. With an amused huff, he replies, “God, do you seriously hate me so much that you’re siding with the lady who just threw tteokbokki in your face over me?”

You know he doesn’t mean it all too seriously, but his words have you contemplating these past few weeks in retrospect. He clearly didn’t know it, but, deep down, you knew there wasn’t a bone in your body that actually hated him. In fact, it was likely because, despite living (and fighting) with him for a while now, you still felt like you didn’t know him well enough to actually have it out for him. With this in mind, it occurred to you that this stupid scheme the other boys had planned had worked. And you’d hate to prove them right, but you resolved to swallow your pride and try to be mature for once.

After all, there’s one thing you (begrudgingly) knew to be true: Park Wonbin was still someone you wanted to know.

“Hey…” you begin, still mindlessly wiping at the stain, which at this point wasn’t going to get any less noticeable. “You know I don't actually hate you, right?”  Your admission catches Wonbin off-guard. He raises his eyebrows slightly, unsure of where this was leading. 

“Uh-huh…” he says skeptically.

“No, I’m being for real! Y’know, when I first met you guys at the café and I figured out you guys were gonna be my new roommates, the one thing I wanted was for you guys to like me. But you… you were just so distant, and cold, and mysterious, and—”

“Okay, okay. I get it,” Wonbin interjects, hands raised in surrender.

“I guess I just got frustrated because we didn’t immediately get along as well as I’d hoped, and it just sorta blew up in my face— in both our faces. I shouldn’t have taken it out on you… I’m sorry.”

Wonbin doesn’t respond at first, gaze directed downwards and his face expressionless as if he hadn’t heard a single word you’d said. You feel the heat rising to your cheeks in embarrassment, ready to take back your apology and replace it with another typically spiteful remark. But then he exhales, returning his gaze to you as he runs a hand through his hair.

“No, you— you shouldn’t apologize. It’s my fault. I was kind of a douchebag,” he admits, picking at his nails in uncertainty. “I shouldn’t have made you feel like the only way you could get through to me was by… y’know…” He waves his hand arbitrarily in place of having to describe the past few weeks of constant bickering and making passive-aggressive jabs at each other.

“I mean, it kinda worked, didn’t it? I feel like we exchanged more words in that argument we had yesterday over toothpaste than the entire first two weeks we knew each other.”

He lets out a hollow laugh. “Mm, guess it did.”

Amidst the bustle of people and the faint music heard from outside the booth, a silence settles between the two of you. It was a kind of silence you weren’t used to with Wonbin, so different from the typical tense, heavy silences you were often subjected to when you were alone with him. Nonetheless, the two of you basked in it as you watched people pass by, chattering and laughing amongst their friends. The sun was beginning to set, and the lampposts lined across the pavement were starting to flicker to life, bathing the festival in a soft, warm glow. It occurred to you that you still had a little under an hour to go stuck working at this booth, but, right now, it didn’t seem so bad.

Wonbin is the first to break the silence, saying, “I saw some people selling bingsu on the way here. I’ve practically been thinking about it this whole time.” He pauses to choose his next words carefully. “If you're not doing anything after this, do you maybe wanna… come with? When we’re done?”

You pretended to contemplate it for a little bit, tapping your finger on your chin. “Hmmm… sure,” you finally reply. “You’re buying, though.”

“Fine,” he yields. “But maybe you should get a change of clothes before we go. You sorta reek of tteokbokki.”

You push at his shoulder with an exasperated groan as the corners of his mouth lift to form a familiar teasing smile. “Oh, screw you, Wonbin.”

← prev | masterlist | next →

꒰ AUTHOR’S NOTE ꒱ finally out of their blatantly despising each other era yayyyy 🥳 also for reference 25,000₩ is around 19$ and 2000₩ is around 1.50$ LOL

꒰ TAGLIST ꒱ open! leave an ask or comment to be added :) (strikethrough = can’t be tagged)

@parkwonbinie @icyona @yoursyuno @onlyhyunjin @naviiy @eepiestgirl @jvngw0nlvr @i03jae @started-with-f-ends-with-uck @annswwa @secretiny @pxnklover @yipyipmorals @mumeimei @planethyuka @soheendo @film-sea @suzayaaa @molensworld @revehosh @winuvs @wonychu @shoberi @nujeskz @swagpersonthings @byeonwooseokabs @5telephones @gyehyeonist @snowyseungs @pinklemonade34 @bunni @fae-renjun @enhacolor @seunghancore @taroddori @kyusqult @babigriin @sngj08 @cupidslovearrows @gacktsa @the-swageyama-tobiyolo @seokkiez @dearestjake @renjuneoo @tami1992x