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vanteguccir · 3 months ago

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── ୨୧ !　THE FARRAR ELEMENTARY SCHOOL IS ALIVE

matt sturniolo x reader

SUMMARY: When Sam and Colby bring the Sturniolo Triplets and Y/N, a medium and Matt's girlfriend, to investigate the Farrar Elementary School, they expect only to discover more about its history, but, instead, meet something far darker.

WARNING: Demon apparition, ghost talk, paranormal experiences.

REQUESTED?: No.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism, copy, or "inspiration"! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.

A/N²: This can be read as a part 2 of my work 'Medium Girl' with Matt Sturniolo.

A/N³: Happy Halloween, guys! 🩷

　　　༻✦༺ 　༻✧༺　༻✦༺

The lightheartedness grew inside the vast gym when Sam, Colby, Matt, Nick, Chris, and Y/N stepped inside of it. The eerie silence of the halls felt distant now, replaced by the echoing laughter and jokes bouncing off the gym's high walls. It was open, empty, and slightly less oppressive than the narrow corridors they'd been walking through. Their cameras' flashlights created stark beams that cut through the heavy dark, bouncing playfully as they pointed at the distant walls and items scattered across the yellowish floor.

"That is terrifying." Chris joked, pointing to a shadowy open doorway at the far end of the gym. His tone was playful, but the door itself seemed to swallow the light, almost absorbing it into an impenetrable black void.

Colby quickly looked over at Chris with a knowing expression, pointing the camera lans at him.

"That is the Boiler Room." He said in a tone both informative and slightly excited.

"That's not an inviting room at all whatsoever." Chris muttered, laughing, his voice betraying more nervous excitement than genuine fear.

As the group chuckled and commented about it, inching forward, Y/N’s laughter faded as her gaze locked onto the entrance. She felt a wave of something cold and clammy wrap around her, more powerful than the draft in the building.

Being a medium, she was no stranger to spiritual energy, but this... this felt different.

Her chest tightened as chills skittered up her spine, her heart hammering faster the longer she stared into the doorway. The energy was thick, almost tangible, pressing down on her like a weight. It was dark, heavy, and so deeply embedded in the space that she could almost taste it on the air; a mix of anger, pain, and a bitterness that sent icy needles racing through her veins.

Matt, standing near her since the moment they entered the school, quickly noticed her shift in demeanor, his brows knitted in concern.

"Hey, you okay?"

She swallowed hard, tearing her gaze from the doorway to look at him, finding comfort in the middle of ocean blue eyes.

"Yeah... Yeah, there’s just... something wrong in there." She murmured, her voice tight. "It doesn’t feel right."

Colby, overhearing, chuckled nervously.

"Yeah, it’s messed up in there." He admitted, shrugging. "We've been in there once before, but if any of you guys want to go, take the camera and look around."

The words hung heavily in the air, a silent challenge.

Nick and Chris immediately pointed at Matt. They both stepped back, dramatically widening their arms to clear a path to the door, their mischievous smirks only amplifying the tension.

"I mean, we all know who the bravest ones here are." Sam teased from behind them, laughing after receiving an "obviously" look from Nick.

Matt flashed a wide, determined grin, meeting Y/N’s eyes with a spark of excitement. After The Driskell Hotel, he discovered that he loved the thrill of these investigations, and with Y/N there, he almost felt invincible. Y/N’s stomach twisted with a mix of fear and anticipation, but she forced herself to shrug, flashing a nonchalant smile in return.

"Guess we’re doing this." She said, her voice more confident than she felt.

Matt took the camera from Colby, giving a quick smirk to the others.

"I feel like there can’t be anything." He joked, his voice steady, earning whoops and cheers from the guys. Together, he and Y/N led the way, with Chris and Nick following close behind.

As they stepped through the doorway into the Boiler Room, the energy shifted drastically. The air was thick, almost suffocating, clinging to their skin like invisible cobwebs. The once-bright beams of the camera’s flashlight seemed to dim as if the darkness here was absorbing the light itself, drinking it up and leaving nothing but a faint glow around them.

Every step Y/N took felt like wading through tar. Her limbs grew heavy, and with each inhale, it was as though she was breathing in the sorrow, anger, and fear that had seeped into the very concrete walls of the room. Her skin prickled, her head was starting to hurt, and a low hum of energy reverberated through her bones, vibrating up her spine and making her feel unsteady on her feet. Matt was ahead, filming with an almost oblivious bravery, but her steps slowed as they entered deeper into the room.

Pain. A pulse of it shot through her, raw and piercing, making her gasp and clench her hands by her sides as if she could wring it out of her body, her heartbeat echoing on her ears. She tried to keep her expression steady, not wanting to alarm the others, but Matt glanced over his shoulder at her, noticing her pale face and furrowed brow.

She shook her head at his questioning eyes, letting him keep walking ahead of her, allowing him, Chris, and Nick to venture toward the back of the room, where another open doorway beckoned, leading into an even darker, more enclosed space.

"Oh my God, it's bigger than I thought-" Matt started excitedly, being interrupted by a scared Nick.

"Matt! Don't say 'Oh my God' like that!"

Y/N stayed close to the entrance, her gaze fixed on the doorway ahead, the corner of her lips lifting slightly with the brother’s bickering. Something felt profoundly wrong in there, and every instinct in her body screamed for her to turn back, to leave the darkness to its own devices.

She took a step forward right after Chris, but the energy hit her like a physical blow. She stumbled, her legs unsteady as she caught herself against the doorframe. Noticing her falter, Chris immediately turned, his concern flaring.

"Whoa, whoa, hey, you okay?" He asked, reaching to steady her, his hand grasping her arm. But Y/N didn’t hear him, nor did she feel his touch. She was already slipping away, pulled into a vision so intense it drowned out reality.

She was now surrounded by towering flames that crackled with a furious intensity. They licked up the walls around her, swallowing everything in a bright, blistering heat. Through the blaze, a young woman appeared, engulfed in flames, her face twisted in agonizing terror. The woman’s scream sliced through the air; a raw, primal sound unlike anything Y/N had ever heard before. Instinctively, her hands flew up to her ears, desperately trying to block out the agonizing cry. It was a cry of pure pain and desperation, the kind that lingered, sinking into the skin and soul.

Then, she saw him. A tall, imposing figure emerged from the shadows behind the woman, his face obscured by the darkness but his presence unmistakably menacing. He loomed over her, radiating a sick, cold satisfaction as the woman screamed, flames rising higher around them. Y/N could feel it, all the malice rolling off the man, thick and suffocating, causing her to gulp, her eyes widening in terror when the man's eyes flickered from the woman to hers.

He couldn't see her, could he?

As the flickering of a lightning, three distinct figures appeared behind the man before vanishing completely, and just as suddenly as it began, the vision ended, leaving Y/N cold, breathless, and disoriented, the horrifying images imprinted in her mind.

Her surroundings snapped back into focus, the dimly lit Boiler Room reappearing around her in hazy fragments. She gasped, struggling to ground herself, her eyes searching around the room frantically, but as her vision cleared, her stomach twisted with a sickening dread. There, in the center of the second room, right in between the other two doorways, crouched a figure that defied anything she’d ever encountered, even in her darkest visions.

This wasn’t a spirit; she could feel the difference. The creature hunched low, its bony hands splayed across the grimy floor, its body twisted and contorted, as if barely contained within the physical plane. Shadows clung to its grotesque form, an aura of darkness so thick it devoured any light that dared come near. Its mottled skin was stretched and scarred, warped with unnatural shapes, as though stitched together from nightmares.

And then, she saw its eyes; deep, glowing red, like embers of molten rage, burning into her with a cruel, penetrating awareness. Those eyes locked onto her, narrowing with a sinister recognition. It knew she could see it, sense it, and understand the threat it posed. The fury in its gaze was suffocating, an anger so intense it filled the room, pressing down on her, trapping her in place.

Before she could gather herself, a voice oozed into her mind, cold and sharp as a dagger, each word dripping with malice. "Don’t tell anyone."

The command reverberated through her skull, a dark echo that chilled her to her core. She felt her heart hammering, her pulse quickening as a frigid terror clawed its way up her spine. The demon remained crouched, but its body tensed, coiled like a predator about to strike.

A whimper scaped from Y/N's throat when it began to inch forward, its gaze never wavering, as if relishing the fear it instilled with each calculated, crawling step.

"Y/N?" Matt’s voice was distant, but it cut through the fog of terror consuming her. She couldn’t respond, frozen in place as the demon drew nearer, dragging itself across the dirty ground, echoing with a disgusting sound of skin pressing against pebbles, her mind trapped in the paralyzing scene.

"What's happening? Why is she looking like that?" Chris's voice sounded muffled, dripping with anxiety, worry, and fear, his hand still holding her arms.

"Baby?" This time, Matt’s voice was sharper, laced with urgency. She felt a shift as he tossed the camera to Nick, then rushed to her side. His presence was solid, grounding, and he wrapped a protective arm around her waist, pulling her close as he tried to get her attention while shielding her from whatever it was that she was seeing. "Hey, babe, are you okay? What’s wrong?"

She could barely hear him, his words muffled, distant. Her legs wobbled, feeling like they might give out at any second, and Matt held her tighter, his warmth battling the unnatural chill that had invaded her body, her skin feeling as cold as the winter.

"Y/N, hey, look at me. Can you hear me?" His tone was steady, doing a great job at hiding the extreme fear that he felt, his hands cradling her face as he searched her eyes for any sign of recognition.

But she couldn’t answer, couldn’t focus. The demon’s furious glare was seared into her vision, its whispered threat echoing in her mind as a thick, oppressive darkness continued to drag her deeper into its depths.

Matt drew a sharp breath, his grip tightening around Y/N as he glanced over his shoulder at his brothers.

"We need to get out of here. Now." His tone was rough, leaving no room for argument.

The severity in his voice snapped them out of their stunned state, and they exchanged a quick look before following the couple to the exit door of the Boiler Room. Their footsteps echoed, tense and hurried, with Nick and Chris casting anxious glances behind them as if hoping to catch a glimpse of whatever had gripped Y/N so tightly, Chris's hand searching desperately for Nick's arm, trying to find comfort.

As they stepped outside the oppressive confines of the room, an almost immediate sense of relief washed over them. The chill that had settled into Y/N’s bones began to ease, and her tense posture softened as if an invisible weight had finally been lifted. She inhaled deeply, her body leaning heavily into Matt’s, letting his steady presence anchor her back to reality. Her scared eyes moved frantically, searching over her shoulders as if waiting for it to follow them, but she only met darkness.

"Shh, you're okay now. I'm right here with you." Matt kept whispered sweet nothings against Y/N's head, gently forcing her to look away from the room, pressing her face against his own shoulder, her hair tickling his chin in a comforting way.

Sam and Colby, who had been standing by, initially cheered at their bravery but quickly went quiet when they noticed the disturbed expressions on everyone’s faces.

Sam stepped forward, worry etched across his features.

"Hey, you guys okay?" He asked, his tone low and concerned.

Matt opened his mouth, his protective instincts kicking in while his arms seemed to wrap around Y/N's body tighter.

"We should give her a second. She just needs a bit to calm down-"

"No." Y/N interrupted, her voice weak but firm. She shook her head, a determined glint in her eyes as she steadied herself, her cold hands finding his biceps, squeezing his hoodie-covered skin in reassurance. "They have to know."

Colby nodded, quickly understanding the weight of what she was about to say. He took the camera from Nick, aiming it at her as he stepped closer, Sam following behind.

Chris and Nick quickly gathered around the couple, assuming protective instances, waiting, their faces a mixture of curiosity and seriousness as Y/N prepared to explain, eyes frantically looking behind their backs every second, the feeling of being watched seeming to grow more intense.

"I... I saw something." She began, her voice a touch unsteady but gathering strength as she continued. "When I looked at that room, there was this... this intense heat, and suddenly, it was like I was somewhere else entirely. I saw flames, a massive fire that seemed to consume everything around it. And in the middle of it all was a young woman, burning alive."

Her voice cracked slightly, and she closed her eyes, trying to shake the haunting image that had imprinted itself in her mind. A warm spread around her left shoulder, and she quickly recognized Nick's comforting touch.

"She was screaming, and it wasn’t like any scream I’ve ever heard before." Y/N continued, her face pale as she relived the vision. "It was pure agony... and then, there was a man behind her, just standing there, watching her burn. He was tall, menacing, and I knew, somehow, that he was the one who did this to her. He for sure worked here back in the day, I just knew it, and he killed her, and he was enjoying it." She paused, her voice barely a whisper. "And then, right before the vision ended, I saw three male figures behind him. I thought it was over, but when I looked up, there was something else in the room with us."

"The janitor, the principal, and the librarian." Sam muttered, furrowing his eyebrows, his eyes meeting Colby's dark ones, which held the same realization look.

The rest of the group was silent, hanging onto every word as Y/N’s gaze darkened, her eyes focused on some invisible point in the distance, Matt's firm hands around her hips keeping her grounded.

"It was a very dark creature, obviously a demon." She whispered. "Big, twisted, and so... so angry. Its skin was... I can’t even describe it. It was unnatural, almost as if it was pulled together from different things, and its eyes... they were red, glowing, and it was looking right at me." Her voice wavered as she continued, a tremor of fear slipping through. "It knew I could see it, and it was furious. And then... I heard a voice. In my head. It told me that I couldn't tell you about it."

A shiver ran through the group, everyone exchanging wary glances, trying to process the weight of what she was saying. Y/N took a shaky breath, her eyes flicking up to meet theirs.

"It started coming toward me, crawling like a snake, and that’s when Matt got to me. But... the warning felt like more than just a threat. It’s like it didn’t want us to have this information. It didn’t want us to know what happened here... This is all way darker than you guys expected."

Colby, his brow furrowed in thought, broke the silence.

"Wait, why wouldn’t it want us to know?"

Y/N hesitated, piecing together the fragments of knowledge she had gathered over years of honing her abilities.

"When it comes to entities like this, especially ones tied to a place or a tragedy... they draw power from secrecy, from fear. If we know what it is, what it’s done, it gives us the upper hand. And even more so if we learn its name."

Sam’s eyes widened, realization dawning on him as his gaze traveled from her to Colby and then back again.

"So, if we know its name, it becomes weaker?"

Y/N nodded slowly.

"Yes. Kind of. Names are powerful, especially with entities like that. It’s a way of binding it, of taking control. And right now, it knows we’re at an advantage. I just... I just have to figure out its name."

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therandompagesblog · 3 months ago

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SKZ Pack Chapter 1

Trigger Warnings: None

Weeks had gone by and it was nearly December. The wolves had changed in who they were. Jeongin became a tougher alpha and spent many weeks training to his full potential, but he also learned to be a better mate to Y/N. He was still making it up to her. Seungmin was still as cocky as ever and spent more time researching the dark side of werewolf lore in case they ended up in a tragic situation again. Felix was sensitive if not more sensitive after what happened and felt more protective of all the wolves so he offered to take part in more training, unlike Jisung who became glued to the side of Y/N. Jisung was far too in love with Y/N and loved to express that as he helped her around the house. Jisung made sure to always tell her she looked beautiful and made a point to kiss her scar first before her lips. Changbin was now on a course to look after werewolves as his sister Jaehee realised how useless Changbin was at saving his own omega. Changbin wasn't great but he could now stitch a minor cut. Minho on the other hand grew colder, he was hurting the most out of all of them. He still did his usual stuff but stayed out of debates and never gave his opinion. Him and Y/N were still not alright. They never spoke to each other unless it was a 'good morning' or a 'thank you'. Minho lost a lot of trust with Y/N and some of the others, but her words cut deep and he wasn't on the path of forgiveness yet. Hyunjin had gone back to his cold self and spent time in his art room, but still made time for Y/N.Chan had woken up but was bedridden as his ribs were still not healing but he was fine. He was pissed for the first twenty-four hours when he found out about Y/N's mission of death, but he got over it, knowing she was fine. He was happier when she came in to look after him, he appreciated her omegaing him but he knew it was tiring her out because she too was slowly healing.

Then there was Y/N she healed eventually but was still bandaged up. Spiritually she was damaged and Hyunjin's soul was trying to repair hers but it was too exhausting for him so she asked him to stop. Y/N wasn't as active as she had liked to be but still made a point to get up and see her wolves, despite Jisung being stuck to her. Not one of them had asked her about that night and it almost became a taboo subject. It was almost silently forbidden to be discussed. Y/N wanted to bring it up to apologise but when she did they would wave her off and tell her it's fine. Still, she knew Minho and Jeongin were the two she massively owed an apology to, but getting them alone was going to be harder. Minho was going to be her biggest challenge but she was going to start off strong by writing him a letter in case he refused to hear her apology and then giving him the flowers. By flowers, she meant the ones she picked from the garden and put into the vase after she turfed out the others. When Y/N came back into the kitchen she saw Minho prepping dinner. He was aware she walked into the kitchen and usually, he doesn't speak unless she speaks first. Y/N had to admit she felt incredibly nervous speaking to him and it was mainly because she hated hearing what she had done wrong. Y/N knew and understood her actions but hearing them made her slightly uncomfortable and defensive. "Minho?" Y/N called as she stood there awkwardly watching him. "Hmm?" Minho acknowledged her but did not look at her so Y/N decided he was comfortable with whatever she was going to say. "I wanted to say I'm sorry okay? Just hear me out and don't say anything. I only want you to listen." Y/N waited for him but he said nothing, making her roll her eyes. "I am sorry for not being grateful for your efforts. I know you worked hard to help and you did more than what I realised and I appreciate that. I guess I wanted to help and, anyway that's not the point. Forget that part. The main thing I wanted to apologise was for using your insecurity against you. I know it was low and I didn't mean it. I'm not good at apologies so I picked some flowers and wrote a letter of apology which I want you to read."

Y/N almost cursed herself at her botched apology. She completely messed it up but there was nothing she could do now except leave the letter on the table and leave him alone, which she did. Y/N left the kitchen and was about to head up to see Chan when Changbin entered the room in his medical clothes. Y/N greeted the beta with a gentle hug which Changbin was grateful for. Y/N knew Changbin wasn't really enjoying the hospital work and studying with his sister, he would rather be at the gym and then play his x-box. Changbin threw his bag down and kicked on his shoes while holding Y/N as he nuzzled her face against his, before pecking her lips. "Shall we go nurse Channie?" Y/N giggled as she kissed him again. "Let me unwind baby and then I'll come right up," Changbin whispered. Y/N nodded and headed up to see Chan who was idly staring up at the ceiling. It made Y/N laugh at how bored he looked. He was completely fed up with being stuck in the bedroom but his right leg was struggling to heal. "Felix said he might take my stitches out soon," Y/N said as she walked over to him and sat on his bed. Chan smiled up at her as he reached for her hand to hold. He loved it when she came to visit him. Admittedly, Chan sometimes got lonely since he was cooped up in the same four walls. "I want to tell you something and I don't want you to take it the wrong way baby. You know I love you." Chan said softly. "Oh no. Uh. Uh. Whatever it is Mr alpha I ain't doing it." Y/N answered as she bopped his nose like a child. "I'm being serious, baby," Chan said causing Y/N to frown. Why was he being so serious? "I know you are feeling incredibly anxious because you are feeling unclaimed and I know I haven't claimed you fully because I wanted to wait until you could trust me and your body was fully healed, but I know at the moment I'm not going to be in any position to do a while and I don't want you to feel unstable in my pack. We all love you, despite the conflicts we do. Which is why I had a chat with Jeongin and I want him to claim you." Chan stated. "No. Jeongin is fuming with me and besides I am completely fine. I'm not feeling anxious, or disconnected in any way. I want to wait. I want you, besides you could lay there." Y/N hinted with a smirk as she pulled his duvet cover down. Chan rolled his eyes nonchalantly. "Baby. Jeongin is over it, if anything it's Minho that's going to take a while. He accepts what you have said but he doesn't forgive easily. Besides Jeongin wants to ease your anxiety." Chan cooed. "I want you Channie to be the first. I don't care how long we have to wait for your leg to get better. Besides Seungmin can keep up." Y/N stated. "My love. What did I do to deserve you." Chan cooed, his heart swelling with pride. As much as he wanted to be the first his mark was already there and she needed to feel settled. "Ya, let's play doctors and nurses," Changbin shouted as he kicked the door open. "Fuck sake," Chan muttered.

Taglist for the iconic readers

@galaxy4489 @mbioooo0000 @jisungs-iced-americano @maybeimmia @hwangrfrnd@wolfo2027 @kayleefriedchicken @leamueller920 @borahae-reads @jennibahng @cookiesandcreammy @leezanetheofficial @jutdwae-flower @danceonmyheyday @jc003 @hpnsfwaddict @linocz @itzreetal987 @skzdreamer13 @reallychaoticwoo @liv1sworld @upsidedownchaire @jutdwae-flower @danceonmyheyday @jc003 @hpnsfwaddict @skzdreamer13 o @ihttinniee @kingdomofpentagon @pixie0627 @tsunderelino @notevenheretbh1 @catlove83 @h0rnyp0t @hash2013 @hyunmikim @emi-han @iknow-uknow-leeknow @jigglypuff3000 @aalexyuuuhm @reallychaoticwoo @missseoulite @ihrtlix @estella-novella @xxeiraxx

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esotericalchemist · 2 months ago

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𝐏𝐀𝐂: 𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐧𝐞𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐰.

TikTok (Matrix of Destiny) - Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)

Disclaimer:

This reading is for entertainment purposes only. Remember, you are always in control of your own life and choices. Take what resonates with you, and leave what does not. If you are sensitive to spiritual psychosis or feel overwhelmed by spiritual content, please prioritize your well-being and scroll away.

𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟏

Cards: 9 of Swords, 6 of Wands, Justice rx, Knight of Cups rx, 3 of Cups, 4 of Swords

Okay so, I am seeing two scenarios;

Scenario 1:

You recently walked away from someone or something. This could have been an old friend, family member, colleague, workplace, or anyone or anything that no longer aligned with your values and standards. For some of you, the situation involved accusations or conflict. You may have felt deeply wronged, and no matter what you did, the other person refused to believe your side of the story. Perhaps they thought you had spoken ill of them to others, betrayed their secrets, or something along those lines.

Whatever the case, it brought you significant anxiety and a sense of hopelessness. You knew deep down you were innocent, yet you were still accused. After many sleepless nights, both figuratively and literally, you made the tough decision to part ways with this person. The reason behind their behavior may remain unclear to you, but this experience likely taught you something important: it doesn’t always matter why someone acts the way they do. What matters is that you respect yourself enough to walk away from toxic relationships and choose your own path.

There is so much positivity and genuine connection waiting for you ahead. Take this time to reflect on what this situation taught you. Rest, identify your boundaries when it comes to others’ behavior, and prepare to move forward. Whatever you do, don’t isolate yourself completely. Healing and growth await you when you open yourself up to new, healthy relationships.

Scenario 2:

There’s someone in your life with whom you need to part ways, but you’re hesitating. This hesitation could stem from fear of them or a fear of being left completely alone. For some of you, this person might be a friend, but for many, it could be a partner, parent, or sibling.

This person is highly manipulative and often moody. They remind me of someone who walks into a room and completely changes the energy, but not in a good way. It’s as if they drain all the positivity from the space. They are rarely honest, excessively temperamental, and highly manipulative. To the outside world, they know how to present themselves in the best light, but you know who they truly are.

You’ve likely confronted this person about their behavior numerous times, but they constantly deflect by playing the victim. Statements like, “Oh, I had a hard childhood; that’s why I’m like this,” or, “I didn’t mean it like that… Nobody understands me,” are common responses. This leaves you feeling trapped and hopeless, as if you’re stuck in a cycle you can’t escape.

There’s also a sense of dependency here. If this person is a friend, you might fear being alone without them. If it’s a partner, you may rely on them emotionally or financially. If it’s a parent, you might depend on them for shelter or stability.

Here’s the advice:

If this is a friend: Walk away. It’s better to enjoy your own company than feel lonely while surrounded by others.

If this is a manipulative partner: End the relationship. Please don’t prolong your suffering.

If this is someone you rely on financially or for shelter: I understand it may be difficult to leave, especially if you’re still a minor or bound by cultural expectations. In this case, focus on creating emotional distance. Observe their behavior without reacting to it. Don’t let their words or actions affect you. Slowly, step by step, work towards breaking free from this dependency.

By taking these steps, I promise a journey of peace and rest is waiting for you. A better chapter lies ahead—you just need to take that first step.

𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟐

Cards: 10 of Wands, Page of Wands (neutral), 5 of Cups rx, the Devil rx, Wheel of Fortune, Knight of Swords

Ah, pile 2… I write this with a warm heart and a smile because this is the “everything depends on you” pile.

Your childhood was marked by responsibilities far beyond what a child should bear. You were juggling school, household duties, caring for siblings, helping your parents—managing far too much for someone so young. Instead of seeing the world as boundless, as children often do, you learned to see it through the limits imposed by these burdens.

This sense of wonder and innocence was overshadowed by adult cynicism—something that has no place in a child’s world but was, unfortunately, present in yours. Over time, this stole your trust—trust in the world, trust in the universe, and even trust in yourself. But trust is precisely what our inner child craves: the belief that everything will be okay, that tomorrow will come even if we can’t be sure of it, and that our dreams can become reality.

Instead, this trust was replaced by frustration. These limitations, both imposed by the outside world and reinforced by your own beliefs, made it impossible for you to truly connect with your inner child. You may have developed feelings of resentment—toward your parents, yourself, those around you, and even your childhood as a whole.

Lately, you’ve embarked on a deep journey of self-reflection. Perhaps you’ve done shadow work, meditated, read self-help books, listened to insightful podcasts, or simply spent time sitting with your thoughts. Whatever path you’ve taken, you’ve reached a profound realization: the past is the past. What happened, happened. What didn’t happen, didn’t.

Rather than spending your energy pointing fingers at others or at life, you’ve chosen to redirect that energy and walk forward on your own path. This is a monumental step, one not everyone can take, and you should be incredibly proud of yourself.

By accepting the past for what it is, you’ve freed yourself from the self-imposed limitations that once held you back. Like the Wheel of Fortune, you’ve realized that everything unfolded as it was meant to. The wheel turns, and while it sometimes brings us to our darkest moments, it always keeps moving, eventually leading us back into the light. What you do with this light is now entirely up to you.

You’ve decided to chase the light of your inner child once more. Maybe this means pursuing a career or study you dreamed of as a child. Perhaps it’s bringing a creative idea to life that once filled you with excitement. Or it could simply be spending time with yourself, nurturing the love you always needed but didn’t receive as a child.

Whatever this path looks like for you, it’s clear that you’re excited about what lies ahead. You’re stepping into a journey of discovery, a path where you’ll reconnect with your true self. And here’s the truth: everything you need to realize your inner child’s dreams is already within you.

The word itself, “inner-child,” reminds us that this part of us lives inside. You already have all the ideas, passion, and potential. If you’re worried about not having the skills, trust that they’ll come naturally as you remain fearless and ambitious.

Destiny and luck are on your side now. As you move forward, don’t let future setbacks limit you. You are a free spirit, and this freedom will carry you to places you never imagined. Trust yourself—you’ve got this.

𝐏𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝟑

Cards: the High Priestess rx, Ace of Pentacles, the Moon, Wheel of Fortune, King of Wands, Knight of Pentacles rx

Okay, pile 3, it’s time to get real.

In the past, you’ve struggled with feelings of jealousy or envy toward the success of others—and deep down, you’ve been aware of it. When you saw someone achieving their dreams, your mind may have spiraled into creating reasons to downplay their success, comforting your ego with rationalizations. But every time, you caught yourself and likely wondered, “Why do I think this way? Where are these feelings coming from?”

These thoughts don’t align with your true character, and you know it. So why do they surface? The answer is simple: fear. When you felt these emotions, it wasn’t about material things like money, cars, or popularity. No, what truly triggered you was seeing someone fearless—someone chasing their dreams relentlessly, working hard for their success, and not shying away from attention or the spotlight. You weren’t envious of what they had; you were envious of their fearlessness, their clarity, and their determination.

For a long time, you’ve felt dissatisfied with your life. The High Priestess Reversed and The Moon suggest you’ve been stuck in an illusion, believing that “better things will come someday.” But here’s the harsh truth: how can better things come if you don’t take action to make them happen?

Sure, you may have liked manifestation videos, created vision boards, or written out scripts of the life you want. And that’s great—those tools are valuable. But manifestation without action is just daydreaming. Dreams will remain dreams until you conquer your fear and start working toward them.

The fact that you’ve felt jealousy or envy toward others is actually a signal. It’s proof that there’s something within you—an untapped potential, a dream, or an aspiration—that you haven’t realized yet. As Carl Jung famously said: “Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life, and you will call it fate.”

Now is the time to confront those unconscious fears and insecurities. It’s time to take control of your destiny and steer your own Wheel of Fortune. You’ve manifested and dreamed enough—it’s time to act.

The Ace of Pentacles is a reminder that opportunities for growth and prosperity are all around you, but you need to seize them. If there aren’t any opportunities right now? Create them yourself. You hold the power to shape your own fortune.

True prosperity doesn’t always mean material wealth. Sometimes, it’s about being content with who you are and letting go of jealousy and resentment toward others. But before you can reach this contentment, you must tap into your inner strength and confront your shadow side.

The King of Wands and Knight of Pentacles Reversed offer guidance here:

King of Wands: Embrace confidence, leadership, and boldness. You have the potential to dream big and turn those dreams into reality—but it requires courage.

Knight of Pentacles Reversed: Stop procrastinating or waiting for the “perfect” time to act. Perfection isn’t the goal—progress is.

Use your dissatisfaction as fuel to move forward. Reflect on where your feelings of jealousy or envy come from, and channel that energy into motivation.

The journey ahead is one of hard work and self-awareness, but the reward is immense. You have everything you need within you to transform your life and chase your dreams. Trust yourself, confront your fears, and know that you are capable of creating a life you’ll be proud of.

TikTok (Matrix of Destiny) - Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)

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mrmoldavite · 3 months ago

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The Main Synastry Overlays & Aspects That Drove My Attraction to Approaching and Speaking to Random Women.

This year, I set myself a mission: to cold-approach every woman that I found attractive—no matter the setting, be it the gym, shopping, public transport, or elsewhere. If your energy drew me in, I wanted to talk to you.

After having established a connection, I’d then dive deeper and analyse our synastry through birth charts.

Here are the key trends I’ve noticed when it comes to attraction and astrology:

1st House Synastry (Time Stops Because We Stand Out)

Immediate and noticeable attraction. Walking into a room and noticing each other felt like entering a spotlight together—undeniable chemistry, as if we existed in our own bubble. We looked good together, Magnetic and undeniable chemistry. Sometimes a little Ego clashes.

2nd House Synastry (Boosted Self-Esteem)

Mutual respect & validation and a sense of value; just talking to each other made us feel confident and seen. Didn't tend to feel a crazy romantic attraction, just more like we're chill with one another. A person you'd smile at, say hello, small talk and wish each other well. Two people simply enjoying each other’s company and building each other up.

5th House Synastry (Energetic, Childlike, Fun Connection)

Vibrant. Fresh. Exciting. Conversations effortlessly turned playful and light-hearted, like our inner child had known each other for years. Felt like a burst of creative energy. Fun, spontaneous dates like bowling, cinema, mini golf, funny conversations over a quick meal. Fun and subtle sexual tension. Situationships or Quick causal light hearted fling.

8th House Synastry (Magnetic Intensity)

Chemistry so palpable, everyone in the room seemed to feel it. Our connection hinted at something primal and raw. Intense sexual tension behind our eyes. Thinking "just you wait and see what I'll do to you". Wanting to f*ck each others souls. Watching each other across the room like a Lion stalking its prey. Can be too intense for those not used to 8th House energy.

11th House Synastry (Instantaneous Friendship Vibes)

The vibe was casual, but deeper connections brewed beneath the surface. We felt like best friends immediately. In the gym for instance we might have ended up working out together, sharing laughs and light conversation. Everything felt easy and natural, with a good surface-level connection that hinted at a deeper, more meaningful bond underneath. Friends with benefits.

12th House Synastry (Past Life Soul Recognition)

I’d feel an inexplicable familiarity, drawn in as if we’d crossed paths in another life. There was depth and intrigue beneath our words. 12th house isn't just hidden enemies seems like people forget that it can also mean a deep feeling of unconditional love for one another. Especially when you're both spiritual beings that have done spiritual inner work. There's no words needed between each other, just an instant subconscious understanding of one another. Eyes are the window to the Soul. Seeing & feeling the spiritual love emanating within each other beyond our physical vessels.

Moon Conjunct Venus (My Moon in Virgo or Venus in Pisces)

Emotional connection blended with admiration. We found ourselves naturally caring about each other’s feelings, even if we’d just met. The kind of tenderness you feel when you see a dog or cat, you just think "awww let me pet you". Naturally supported & fulfilled each other emotionally, with little effort, creating an immediate sense of comfort and trust.

Ascendant Conjunct Venus/Mars (Attention Drawn)

The way we noticed each other was magnetic. My presence caught their eye, and they instantly held mine. It was like a beacon of light drawing us together. The way I moved, spoke, and carried myself seemed to be exactly what they were looking for—and they had the same effect on me. Every glance I'd take of them felt significant, making it hard to look away from.

Sun Conjunct Venus/Mars (Captivating Aura)

Our energies combined in a way that others could sense. I became more aware of my own glow and theirs. Our conversations and laughter seemed to light up the entire room. They saw how my Ego expresses itself as ideal match. Naturally we fit together.

Venus Square Pluto (Intensity)

Strong, transformative attraction that felt like a challenge to resist; conversations and eye contact were magnetic. Feel like I have this aspect with so many people because of my Venus in Pisces in a generation of Pluto in Sagittarius. The Pluto person loves how gracious my Venus placements is, the square makes them feel obsessive, intense and drawn to me. They want to own me.

Lilith in 1st, 5th, 7th, & 8th House Synastry:

A sense of forbidden attraction and untamed energy, manifesting in bold stares and raw authenticity.

1st House; My physical appearance & self expression is just raw and irresistible to them.

5th: Can't get enough of each other. Lots of fun together.

7th: Lilith energy just feels like a perfect fit. What you didn't know was missing.

8th: Knowing how to tap into each others hidden sexual desires. Insatiable.

Conclusion

I won't even front this little experiment/journey of cold-approaching beautiful women and then being able to explore the synastry aspects has been very insightful and has shown me how astrology definitely reflects the connections we feel with others.

Each encounter I had, whether it be brief or deep, has revealed unique chemistry, patterns of attraction and has vastly deepened my real world understanding of astrology aspects.

It’s not even just about charts; it’s about experiencing real connections in the moment. How fascinating it is to be able to experience certain types of bonds and then have the feelings backed up by astrological patterns.

The moments I've experienced have remind me of how the universe aligns energies and paths in such mystical way!

I hope this post was informative.

(P.s. I'm 6'3, have an 8h Venus, Leo Rising & Aries Stellium. My aura and confidence is powerful, which is why I am able to get a lot of attention from women). 😏😉

#astrology #synastry #8th house #8th house synastry #lilith #aspects #astro community #astro observations #astro notes #birth chart #12th house synastry #1st house synastry #11th house synastry #lilith synastry #5th house synastry #2nd house synastry #astrology tumblr #astrology community

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sovenusian · 11 months ago

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Matured Energy of Each Sun Sign

(does not to relate to what age you are.)

A matured Aries is a master communicator and story teller, they can easily pull and hold the attention of the crowd on them, only this time it is to shine light on something beyond them, and it's usually the wisdom they have gathered on their spiritual journey of having the self as the center of their wants and needs.

A matured Taurus is the tamed bull. They become much more calm and understanding of ways of life and mindsets differing from their own, and don't feel the need to make known, how thorough their stances on their beliefs are. They loosen up a bit, like a Cane Corso allowing a rambunctious chihuahua to feign dominance.

A matured Gemini uses the seemingly fractured personality to create genius works and can masterfully connect with any age group or walk of life. They respect they are the embodiment of "I have an idea" but on drugs (lol) and live in that truth. They don't provide tolerance for what they do not like around them.

A matured Cancer stopped being petty and stops wading in the murky waters of emotional manipulation, and starts wielding these energies as gift, for others. You may not find a more generous, selfless, nurturing being. They have the strength to grow other people and bring what's dead back to life.

A matured Leo finally takes more pride in the impact of it's works, more than the ability to do them or be recognized for being the one to do them. They enjoy showing the character traits that truly make them beautiful. The humility they acquire despite having achieved a great deal of refinement, is what becomes what makes them shine at their brightest.

A matured Virgo learned to put themselves, their hearts truly first. Their dutiful and ambitious drives have taught them their accompanying lessons, which are to allow yourself to relax, you are enough, you really are so damn dope, and comparing your output to the logistics was a stressful way to live and that is, the past. It's a death to criticism and a birth to healthy analyzation.

A matured Libra has learned how to be in love with love, in a healthy way. In love with Real Love; with the raw energy and authenticity of it's energy, that way when humans and opportunities come around that claim to be Love, they can be distinguishing and keep their own heart set on what they have learned to be it's truth. They have mastered detachment.

A matured Scorpio has adjusted their perspective, placing the abilities of being extremely passionate and emotionally intense, only in situations that don't create more chaos. Their lifelong journey for true power has moved them into a space where they are more settled and accomplished. They learn the rhythm of life and can finally become selfless, and this is where their energy is truly it's most powerful.

A matured Sagittarius is the ember stage of fire; warm, spreading and long lasting. The knowledge and philosophies acquired over the years are now steeped, grounded in substance and embedded in a person that can finally sit down long enough, and have the patience, to share it's inspirations. Their habit to be generous and spreading have switched out it's impulsive nature for selectivity and self- preservation.

A matured Capricorn drops the shrewdness, and can be an exemplified patriot of what they stood for when they initially started their ambitious climb of hard earned success. They realize just because they are the goats, does not mean anybody and everything are the rocks and steps to ascend upon, and they warm their heart up enough to trust others with their vulnerabilities. They retire their need to be serious for the upholding of the many responsibilities all Capricorns are dealt, and they let that beautiful ability to entertain and bring joy be what they now lead and corale others with.

A matured Aquarius honors the unbeaten path they chose and created by tooth and nail, by sharing with others the lessons learned from it. Their ability to be friendly and connect with anyone, becomes more filled out, & it becomes harder for them to be perceived as disingenuous, because they can now choose the role they'll play in the life of every individual they meet, and share the gems needed like the sages they were born to be. They feel the freedom to become even more obscure.

A matured Pisces is a vessel of universal love. They spend their lives being a collage of all the human personality could offer, from kind to cruel, yielding to stubborn, and they take each lesson from their colorful experiences, and only extract the most optimistic, high frequency wisdom from them. They keep their mystery while their ability to impart love to others unfolds endlessly.

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punkpandapatrixk · 6 months ago

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💫Current aenergy Check-In ♦︎ Timeless Pick A Card

You’re done learning, right? Where are you going? What are you getting? Your wish fulfilment, your karmic/cosmic rewards, your Life Purpose and self-actualisation, your raison d'être; everything becomes ever clearer from here.

Just a reminder, the term ‘Life Purpose’ may seem heavy and serious and all, but the truth of the matter is, everybody’s purpose for being born here is to remember to have a good time! Time you stopped being a slave to the pigs of capitalism XD

In you lies the power to cause a miracle to stir🍻

Miracles for all begin when a bunch of individuals believe in their innate magick. As the percentage goes up the whole world gets lifted. If this reading has appeared in your Interface of Reality, know that you’re well on your way to manifesting your Highest Intended Good.

The peeps who are going to resonate most with this PAC are probably those that have been walking a thorny path of spiritual awakening. You’ve sacrificed so much just for Humanity; damn, this world doesn’t even deserve a Soul like yours. But your happiness is just about to burst like crazy.

And even in your living your happy life you’re serving this Matrix. When you’re happy and spiritually fulfilled, the sounds, the cheers that you make, will echo throughout the world. This Matrix becomes a happier place with more happy people in it.

Where are you going? What are you getting? I didn’t put a year on this reading, so that whenever you find this in the future, that’s the timeline you’re on~

SONG: この星のどこかで (kono hoshi no dokoka de; Somewhere in This Star) from DORAEMON Nobita’s Legend of the Sun King

MOVIES: The Lord of the Rings trilogy LMAO

deck-bottom: Page of Pentacles Rx, Gold Physician (Hippocrates), Priestess of Wishes

[PAC Masterlist] [Patreon] [Paid Readings] [buymeaboba]

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 1 – It’s Perfectly Safe to Follow the Love in Your Heart

VIBE: Merry & Pippin, Arwen

how you’re doing so far – Knight of Cups

Of all the Piles, you seem to have been on a strict path of following your heart. It’s like, you’ve been being showered by so many signs and synchronicities by your Higher Self and team of Spirit Guides. I’m not sure if this is because you came from a rather lax background or if you’ve had to fight for your freedom, but you’ve definitely been following your heart towards a sense of autonomy.

The thing is, that adventurer spirit of yours might have caused you to come face to face with some dangerous situations or perhaps you’ve been met with some catastrophic failures along the way. I think you became somewhat scared of following your heart now due to such past experiences. You know there’s that quote that says: ‘I’m not following my heart anymore. That bitch gives bad directions.’

Up until fairly recently you could’ve thought like that, for a bit maybe. But I think you know deep down that such a statement is not entirely correct. I think you know that following your heart, although it’s met you with some crazy adventures, has shown you the path to total liberation. Aren’t you glad you’ve been able to carve out an existence of your own~?

rest of the year – Ace of Pentacles Rx

This card being in reverse, one might think… ‘What? I won’t have money until the rest of the year?!’ It’s not like that. This is saying you’ve paid everything forward. For a number of years now you’ve been working so hard on all planes of your existence. It’s unimaginable to most people just how much ‘work’ you’ve worked to make things work! They’ll never understand it because in their eyes, there hasn’t been much, if at all, result that you’ve managed to produce.

It kinda didn’t make sense just how little the Universe was giving you for all the spiritual and inner work you’ve done on yourself. I think you could’ve felt cursed or something. Abandoned by all the forces of Light or something. So, I don’t know why it’s had to be like that, maybe some spiritual challenge or another, but you’ve paid all of that hard work in advance. Your good will didn’t go unnoticed, OK? All that you’ve prayed for and dreamt of, the Universe has a record of all of that.

The rest of this year? Please don’t work hard anymore. Don’t be afraid of the other shoe dropping. You’ve paid it all forward. The rest of this year is where your story takes a turn. Your riches are coming effortlessly. You can eat all you want when you want. You can sleep as much as you want to recover from prolonged stress. You can simply blink and your money bags are still going to refill faster than you can spend. Rejoice, baby~!

where you’re going from here – King of Swords Rx

It seems to me that your ‘previous Life’ was one where you had to live with the utmost logic. You thought and analysed everything so hard. You played by the book. You followed all the rules. You were a law-abiding citizen. But logic…I think now you know that logic only gets in the way of magic. That’s what your Higher Self and team of Spirit Guides wanted you to unlearn.

I know it’s been so hard, but it all ends here. You’ve graduated all of those hard lessons of unlearning and relearning what it means to be a Divine Human on Gaia. You’ve learnt to trust yourself! You’ve learnt to distinguish between your ego misleading you and your heart guiding you. There is so much that you can teach other people, you know. Teach them how to navigate their fears. And you’re an example of how that can be done, because you’ve crawled through hell and back again triumphant.

From here, your Life will be nothing short of magical events and encounters back-to-back again. You’re back on your natural high-frequency again. Welcome back. In fact, it’s already playing out serendipitously in recent weeks, hasn’t it? Do not fear the other shoe dropping; you’re floating now! It’s safe for you to glide where your heart is guiding you~ This is exactly where your story takes a turn. Congratulations, Champion!

CURRENTS🔻🧡

fare thee well – Silver Astronomer (Galileo Galilei)

Life’s grand adventures – Priestess of Inspiration

Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 2 – Don’t You See the Sun Already Peeking from Your Window?

VIBE: Sam & Frodo, Galadriel

how you’re doing so far – XIX The Sun Rx

‘Bad things only happen to me because I’m the main character, so it’s only part of the plot.’ This is the first thing that comes to mind as I tap into your aenergy. My gosh, this card here is telling me you haven’t had a single day of sunshine for a stupidly long time. You’ve had to go through a Sam & Frodo arc, it seems. Walking barefoot to Mordor to destroy some evil old paradigm that you’ve likely inherited from a stupid part of your bloodline.

An ancestor some lines back, some time, some when, some where, fucked up big time and you’re fixing shit for everybody. Just like those little Hobbits who totally ain’t got any relation to some war 3000 years prior but they’re the ones suffering the MOST the entire story! XD It’s kinda been like that for you for some time now. My god, I feel for you! But, the fact that this card has appeared here only means that things are turning around for you :D Your eternal sunshine is rising!

Well, haven’t you noticed that its ray can already be seen from your window? Hasn’t it got warmer even the slightest bit now? Things have gotten significantly easier even if they’re only small improvements, right? You’re currently travelling back to Rivendell on the backs of the Great Eagles. It’s easy-peasy from now. You can relax. Take a deep breath. Breathe in that chlorophyll from the Nature around you~! XD

rest of the year – 5 of Pentacles

What a strange card to appear here, but this is essentially saying that you’re rebuilding what’s been broken and reclaiming what’s been stolen. Your whole world—your ‘normal’—was destroyed by some forces and you had to unlearn what you took for granted as ‘reality’, and again, relearn what it means to be a Divine You whilst existing in society. All that was destroyed, stolen from you…none of it was the real you anyway. So it’s okay that it all disappeared.

You were able to discover the pure gem that is the real you that was hidden beneath those ‘identities’, habits, customs, norms, and everything else you were told you should be, when in reality, you were always somewhat different somewhere deep in your psyche. You weren’t like everybody else and you didn’t even want the things they wanted. But you conformed because it was a matter of survival.

Rest of this year, you’re still going to heal from all of that bullshit. More like, healing from the aftermath of fighting for your true Divine Identity as your I AM essence. The rest of the year, you’re healing more than doing or jumping to the next adventure. All good Souls deserve a good rest after a good battle! You’ve won against the Matrix; you’ve won against society and/or tradition. For now, celebrate this huge win~

where you’re going from here – Ace of Cups Rx

After this healing period, I see that you’re only beginning to find your bearing again in the world. It’s OK that these things take time. All good things take time to rebuild. If you want to speed up your manifestation with subliminals, try those that contain perfect self-concept affirmations to solidify your sense of self-worth ;P The Sun is rising and it’s getting brighter and bigger in your world.

Soon, you won’t even remember being this gloomy creature that you’ve been for a while. I see that in time, you’ll find yourself being creative again, being motivated, and clear about what you want and can do in this world. So many of your natural talents are going to burst out of you, making you work endlessly for a goal that truly matters. So as you can see, cherish this healing phase.

The solitude you’re in now is serving your highest good. This time is making space for you to heal, rehab, grow (or grow back), and release even more remnants of your old self, old world. This isn’t going to last forever and if you can heal in quiet, isn’t that ideal? Nobody’s gonna know you in this healing phase that sometimes can get a little awkward, cringe, or downright ugly XD

CURRENTS🔻💙

fare thee well – Silver Astrologer (John Dee)

Life’s grand adventures – Priestess of Healing

Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 3 – In the Full Embrace of Your Higher Self, Spirit Guides and Cosmic Ancestors, Go Forward!

VIBE: Aragorn & Legolas, Gandalf the White

how you’re doing so far – 4 of Swords Rx

Of all the Piles, yours carries the strongest feeling of ‘action’. You’re being carried somewhere more suitable for your frequency. In many ways, you’re also being carried where you’re needed. This can differ for everybody but the majority of you will still feel a sense of calm and belonging though. So it isn’t like you’re being thrown into a war zone just because you have the capacity to fend off enemies or heal wounded soldiers XD

Not like that. Not really. This aenergy is a bit convoluted… But basically, up until now you’ve been a fighter of sort, just like Aragorn, Legolas and Gandalf. Fighting for something important, defending causes that matter. Up until then, you were Gandalf the Grey, and then at some point you died, and now you’ve been reborn as Gandalf the White. That’s about the gist of how you’ve been doing.

Sooner than later, the forces of the Universe are going to make you move places or jobs. There’s a strong sense of being moved to a different location. But if that doesn’t resonate, you could be improving your house or like there’s this sense of a change of scenery, one way or another. It’s deeply needed. You’ve been breathing in muddy waters, you know.

rest of the year – XX The Last Judgement Rx

The fact that your cards are all in reverse is indicating a waiting period until you’re thrown into your next mission. Yeah, like Gandalf the Grey in waiting to become Gandalf the White. Rest of the year you’re gaining momentum. I think you could be hearing some good news from something you’ve applied for? Or this could signify the advent of a once-in-a-lifetime kind of opportunity suddenly presenting itself to you.

The clarion call is clarioning LOL This is why I think you’re being called to a different place, but if not, then a higher plane of existence. So this could also mean a job promotion or a new, improved way to earn your keep. There is a sense of finally serving your highest purpose with a talent or spiritual gift you’ve been refining, polishing in recent years. You could be healing people in ways that don’t necessarily look like ‘healing’.

You know? You could be elevating other people’s spirits and helping them transmute their own bullshit by just allowing them to connect or work with you. If this is your main pile, you’re definitely an aenergy worker. A spirit worker. Maybe even a miracle worker. All thanks to your insanely high-frequency. Babe, you ain’t even in this realm anymore XD

where you’re going from here – Page of Cups

I feel very strongly that you’re someone who possesses wisdom beyond the mundane. You’re practical, you’re sensible, but you’re so Universal that all your wisdom is timeless. You’re someone who has the ability to connect with all peoples; young and old, female and male, rich and poor, famous and regular, what have you. Your words reverberate through the ages.

I feel that you’re somebody who holds timeless wisdom and not just ancient or occult. Your highest religion, so to speak, is Love and Respect for all people. So, no matter what you have to say and share with the world, most people will be able to see that you come from the highest place of Love. That you possess the desire to heal and empower all people.

That said, you’re going to be put in a place where you can connect with all kinds of people, all for you to inspire Love in them. Yes, Love, and it comes in all kinds of different ways, right? First and foremost, I see that you’re someone who can teach people how to love themselves first. How they can expect more, better, for themselves. And only true Love can provide that sense of fulfilment.

Old people are going to be rejuvenated by you. Young people are going to be inspired by you. That’s your superpower that needs to be witnessed by the world <3

CURRENTS🔻💚

fare thee well – Red Astronomer (Johannes Kepler)

Life’s grand adventures – Priestess of Contemplation

Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

[PAC Masterlist] [Patreon] [Paid Readings] [buymeaboba]

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etz-ashashiyot · 8 months ago

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I'm sorry, but actually I'm not over that comment whining about how several of the JVP ritual, uh, practices and bastardization of Judaism are being excluded and how we can't police people's identities.

Actually yes we absolutely can.

[Rant incoming]

Listen, I hate exclusion, alright? Inclusion is always the answer when it comes to people knowing who they are. Every obnoxious identity policing thing in the queer community that has divided us and ripped apart communities has been cruel, counterproductive, given platform to bigots, a distraction from the real issues bearing down on us, and honestly just dumb as a box of rocks. Okay? Okay.

But Jewish identity works differently, because it isn't about YOU. Becoming Jewish is about taking on Jewish culture and religion, a closed ethnoreligious culture, through the narrow path consented to by the collective Jewish people. There IS a path, but it is a highly supervised one. Otherwise it's just appropriation and cultural theft; something Jews have been subjected to for millennia. And if you do legitimately convert you do so because you love the Jewish people - the whole Jewish people - and want passionately to be a Jew for its own sake. You want to join our nation-tribe. You want to join our family.

And the crazy thing to me, the thing that still blows my mind, is that this is allowed! Even after millennia of appropriation, oppression, violence, expulsions, and genocides, Am Yisrael still accepts genuine gerim. It would be so understandable if they had closed the path entirely and tried to shut out outsiders who might bring in danger on their heels even if they themselves were not dangerous.

But they didn't. We didn't. To me this is a miracle, a blessing, and sign of true faith and hope. It is a privilege to be here.

Yet in the same turn, you gotta respect the process! You can't just declare yourself a Jew simply because you feel like it — it doesn't work like that. You can't just declare yourself an Argentinian one morning either without becoming a citizen first, even if you have Argentinian ancestry. And sure, if you do have some of that ancestry, you are connected to the nation, but that's different from being given a vote y'know?

Using a totally unsupervised, totally unsanctioned, brand-new neo-pagan ritual to unilaterally declare your membership in a tribe does not make you one of us. If anything, it proves why you never will be.

Now! Let's assume for a moment that we are referring only to the provably halachic Jews whose connection and backgrounds are beyond reasonable questioning.

You can never really leave the tribe, but you absolutely can apostasize. Plenty of Jews do it. There are plenty of Jews who find that Judaism is not spiritually fulfilling for them but something else is, and they convert out. There are halachic Jews who have walked away from Judaism in order to practice any other number of religions: Christianity, Islam, Neo-paganism, Hinduism, etc.

That is their prerogative, but by doing so they turn away from their people in a serious way and cannot be said to be practicing Judaism. There is of course room for many different types of Jewish practice, but conversely, there are practices that are too far removed from Judaism to meaningfully be considered as such. Otherwise, it's no longer a coherent group identity. And because Judaism is a collective identity, that actually matters.

The Jews as a people have decided that worshipping gods that are not Hashem is not within the realm of Judaism, which is why messianic "Jews" are not practicing a valid form of Judaism even if they are halachicly Jewish and/or have Jewish ancestry. Worshipping Jesus makes you a Christian or at least adjacent. That is a hard boundary.

And yeah — if you change the basic meaning of holidays, if you bring in lots of practices that are brand new and have no halachic or even historical basis, are often highly individualistic, and would not be accepted as Judaism by the vast majority of Jews, then it absolutely falls outside it. If I started practicing a religion that made little icons of Muhammad to pray to once a day and celebrated my ingenuity with pork roast and a nice glass of wine, I don't get to say that I'm practicing Islam.

These people are doing the Jewish equivalent. It is something else entirely. Especially because so many of these practices spit in the face of major tenets of Judaism and go against Jewish values.

To treat it otherwise is to treat it as an absolutely meaningless aesthetic rather than a living breathing ethnoreligious tribe of people who get to decide our own community's boundaries and practices collectively.

And for the naysayers who still disrespect Judaism and Jewish identity and peoplehood so much that they think that they get to define Judaism more than actual rabbis? Look, we can't physically stop you from calling yourself Jewish, but by the same turn, YOU can't force US to recognize you as one of us. You can be mad, but that's the thing about group cultural identities — that cultural group gets to decide whether they claim you or not.

[To be clear: this is not about politics — there are plenty of Jewish non-Zionists and anti-Zionists who are 100% Jewish. This is about this one specific shitty organization and this particular type of behavior.]

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theeternalwombtarot · 3 months ago

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What you need to work on right now to change your life:

message: In the energy of change and transformation brought upon us by the fall season I thought I would touch on this by providing a reading to further self introspection and growth. A theme in my life right now is drastic change and growing further into my higher self and that meant for me leaving behind and releasing everything I’d ever known, loved and cared for if it was not right for me to prepare for the blessings, change and manifestations I was praying for. Even still there are instances where me pausing to reflect before I make a choice is incredibly necessary and I don’t think I’m the only one within this collective that is undergoing change and transformation or needs the tools and guidance to make different choices that will put them on the path of enlightenment after walking upon one math their entire lives or for years long karmic cycles that are ready to close out and be done for. 🤎.

note: if you're pile one or pile two, check both piles one and two, there may be messages for you in both.

****

pile one:

what you need to work on:

it seems like you've reached a level in your life that's going to require you to not only become clear on what you want and make some important decisions but that requires you to enact change through action and behavior. And there's a lot here, there's a lot of planning that's going into this energy, a lot of making hard choices, cutting losses, or committing to a new version of yourself and a new lifestyle that you've never had before. a lot of you are in this space in your life where you're essentially having to decide and come to terms with wanting more for yourself and separating yourself from others who don't want more for you or who can't provide you with more or who simply are living their lives in a way that doesn't resonate with who you are and what you want out of this life.

I think it's even deeper than separating yourselves from those people on a physical level but also like on a spiritual and contextual level like acknowledging that there is more for you to have and you are not meant to be like everyone else in the sense that you do what everyone else does, settle for what everyone else settles for, etc. and that's not to say that THEY are settling because there comes a point in time where you also have to acknowledge that there are people you're setting yourself apart from who are meant to live their lives a certain way and that is there life to have and to be content with and it has nothing to do with you because you don't belong in their reality sharing the same lifestyle as them.

there are a lot of people on this earthly plane who still have various lifetimes left to live and plenty of lessons to learn and paths to embark on and that's just not you. the second you allow yourself to be different from other people, step into this role of leadership or be different to lead the masses you will unlock something within yourself and the power you need to move forward gracefully and at your fullest strength. you are not meant to work the 9-5 you keep trying to force yourself to have to assimilate, you are not meant to be doing average things, walking around like normal people, you're not meant to be in mediocre relationships with dysfunctional people you have to fight for your whole life, etc. I think there's also a fear of being seen and a fear of rejection that's coming from this pile that stems from an inner child wound.

You fear changing directions or branching out and standing on your own and it not working out or people looking at you sideways for investing in and working at what you're trying to make happen. I'm seeing imagery of like lines of people walking along the same path, bunched together and moving in sync going in all the same direction and you running out of that line and off of that pathway and running off into the distance to go be somewhere else, to go find something more for yourself and all of these people being completely confused and unsure what you're doing or what is going through your mind to convince you to depart from the group and go where you wanted to go and not wherever they're headed to if they even know where that is.

I feel like what you need to work on is remedying this thing within yourself that holds you in a state of fear and a place where you're out of alignment with what needs to be done and what's meant for you to be doing in this lifetime. There's this energy of misalignment or like disharmony or internal warfare I'm picking up on that has to do with not only fear of rejection but a lack of self-love and self-worth. How valuable you think YOU are is going to dictate how you move and how much you trust yourself to branch out and honor yourself no matter what that is. I just got a message here about some of you becoming in alignment with a member or some members of your soul family, there may be a friend of yours or a loved one whose in this pile who you're now vibrating on the same frequency with, someone you may have looked up to or seen as someone higher than you or they felt this way about you. You need to take a moment to turn inwards and look at how you feel, assess what you want to do, assess where you want to go, assess what you want and if that means you have to separate yourself from the masses to do that so that you can be in your power decide if you are willing and able to change your life.

Also like assess what type of people you spend your time around and really look at those people, I hate to sort of lead you into the energy of judgment or something like that but maybe make a list of your friends and family members and write down next to their names what types of energy they give you or what about them you've noticed or what types of things you feel like you put up with when it comes to them and how that makes you feel and affects your life, some of you could really benefit from sitting down and writing it all down so that you can think it completely through and stop trying to do mental math regarding what you're considering. It's time for you to sit down and release all the inner turmoil you're carrying within you, your deep-seated fears, your secrets, all your worries. I feel like a handful of you have been doing the inner work for years or have attempted to do the inner work to solve and release these things but it didn't work out or the issues didn't completely resolve itself but I think time is on your side and things are in your favor to succeed in what you're trying to release so that you can move on and have a good life. live a good life.

guidance:

turn inwards and focus on your personal setbacks and honor yourself by taking the time to work through them. forgive yourself for not seeing your mistakes sooner and for holding yourself back in the ways you have and prepare to move on. if you've had a hard time letting go of or moving on from anything lately it's because of the connection lower vibrational or afraid versions of yourself are carrying to those things. once you work through those things and forgive yourself you will move on. some of you are going through your spiritual awakening or your dark night of the soul. embrace that things are changing if you're new to this, follow this change to your salvation.

get your priorities in order, learn how to manage your time, create a schedule or a routine for yourself, etc. you need to hunker down and focus on your path forward and your work both your inner work and your physical work whatever that may be. invest in yourself, bet on yourself, believe in yourself!!

practice some discipline in your life and this time do it for the right reasons, some of you may have a hard time committing to things or staying committed to things you've been working on for a long time due to the mindset you have towards whatever you're working on or whatever you're doing. figure out what the issue is in your mindset and change it so that you can reach goals and do things for yourself that will better you and your life in the long run.

put some respect on your ideas, and your potential to succeed. You severely underestimate how much power you have or how much you could achieve or have if you would just honor yourself and respect yourself. Also, honor and prioritize growth and progress forward in your life. do whatever you're going to do next for your progression forward, to get where you're going, to accomplish what you want, to make yourself happy, and support yourself and your ability to have accolades.

be patient and be gentle with yourself, the reason you feel intimidated by things that overwhelm you or feel challenging and difficult is because you won't allow yourself to move at your own pace or for your success to be defined by you instead of other people. You're struggling because you're still thinking from the same school of thought that the masses use that says that you need other people to validate your success or tell you that you're moving in the right direction or doing things correctly. remember your purpose or what you're working for or what you're fighting for and if that doesn't have anything to do with living for other people you need to reestablish how you're working towards it and how much of your actions and behaviors is to please or impress others or whatever.

****

pile two:

what you need to work on: it seems like for you pile two the starting objective is that of letting go of and releasing pain or getting ready to move on from something, some experiences you've lived through, a lifestyle, or I even want to say an upbringing for some of you. There was a way that things were for you in your early life that really affected you, maybe your self-esteem, maybe your behavior (the way you communicated or the way you interacted with others), etc. Only you know your story or what you've been through but now there comes a time where you've got all these untapped talents or these untapped energetic gifts if it is even something of such large importance, it may even be a new way of living or carrying yourself that opens you up to more abundance or allows you to exist in a higher timeline through the change you're making.

Just like how we have to change our behavior and/or our mindsets to be able to maintain the lives and realities we've manifested for ourselves that are different, separate from, and better than what we've come from or experienced in the past where our old ways of thinking and behaviors may have been okay, may have been necessary to protect ourselves or may have been things we grew accustomed to. It's time to tap into that energy or work on our behaviors, our mindsets, etc. so that we can have and maintain the things that make us happy.

Even if it's things that don't pertain to other people which could be the case for a large amount of you this could be like deep-seated fears or insecurities that impair the way we view ourselves and then how we behave, or self-limiting beliefs that impair the way we show up in the world or what opportunities we allow ourselves to come into or have. for others of you, it could be behaviors that do have to do with other people, how we respond when we're frustrated, our projections, or how we treat people around us when we feel afraid of being hurt or when we feel we're in a vulnerable position, etc.

spirit wants you to work on turning inwards so that you can take some time out to tend to your healing but also tend to how it is you're feeling about your life right now or about your physical world, you could be feeling tired, burnt out, having a hard time sleeping or feeling restless, you could also be having a hard time focusing on responsibilities and on what you need to be doing right now. This is another thing you need to work on, listening to your body and turning inwards for alignment and making sure that you're okay.

there's also a need for you to focus on love right now and your romantic relationships and invest in those or someone in your energy right now that you've been pouring into, your love for them will increase even further despite you probably thinking it can't and your relationship with them will drastically improve through your self love journey but also through your focus and investment in them.

You also need to work with and focus on the sudden changes that have been going on in your life and for some of you some spiritual awakenings, there's a large amount of power that has gone untapped within you there's more for you to find on your spiritual journey.

guidance:

please invest in this love connection or whatever this is in the realm of love within your life pile two, you've got the ten of cups here symbolizing divine love, soulmates, potentially even marriage, children, etc!!

work heavily on your self-compassion, self-concept, and those internal and deep-seated emotions we talked about so they stop hindering your progression forward pile two especially those feelings and behaviors that create blockages in your relationships due to dysfunctional behavior and those that even create more issues for yourself in your day to day life in terms of the way you behave and carry yourself while facing tension and issues in your outside world.

assess areas in your life where you're holding back from taking risks or holding onto fear in your life, we already talked about deep seated fears or self limiting beliefs but spirit thinks it's important that you become clear on what it is specifically that you're holding yourself back from.

work on preparing for your personal transition forward by wrapping up unfinished business, putting to rest all those bad schools of thought, leaving your past behind you by releasing all those dysfunctional behaviors, investing in things that mean something to you within this new life, etc. to change your life requires changes in behavior, changes in your mind, changes in your habits and ways of living that is attached to an old life or old reality.

be careful that your self protection or your behaviors and tendencies to avoid getting hurt don't become greedy and hurt other people who haven't done anything to you pile two, this is really important don't block your blessings because you're afraid of losing them.

****

pile three:

what you need to work on:

Pile three... ugh my poor pile three's lol, I feel like Pile three in my readings is always the last part of the collective and there's a large amount of you that aren't yet awake or aren't yet completely aware of what's going on and what needs to be done in your lives. Some of you are sort of still in that energy of living your life in a way that doesn't have much room for introspection or pausing to come to an understanding about your hardships and why your life is the way that it is. Some of you could even have a hard time with spiritual thinking or have a hard time believing in tarot readings, divination, and all these things and I think that's completely fine as it takes everyone a while to come to a point of adjusting to the idea that there's more to the world than just the physical. The first card in your spread pile three is the nine of wands upright, to me in your reading today this nine of wands sort of gives me the energy of entering or undergoing spiritual awakening and a connection with the divine or with the spiritual realms and doing the inner work or practicing the mindfulness to bring you further in your life. There's real power in this pile and this collective that I feel like has gone untapped for a very long time due to conditioning, lifestyle choices, and for some of you maybe just the person you've grown up to be and how you view and see the world to make sense to you like I get the energy of like cognitive dissonance here or trying to avoid cognitive dissonance and opening up doors of learning or understanding of the spiritual realm to avoid your world view being turned upside down or becoming more complicated than you feel like you can handle.

But I think what many of you don't realize is that this disconnection to the spiritual realm is what's creating this empty like void you may be carrying or this feeling of dissatisfaction or lack of fulfillment in your lives. some of you guys exist primarily in the physical and material world and neglect your internal life or your spiritual lives and this is affecting you and eating away at you, what you don't realize is that you need to come to a conclusion and acknowledge this energy that's sitting within you so that you can create solutions, you guys are solution based people or have very heavy masculine energy, some of you could be men actually. A good handful of you are earth signs or earth-side dominant and disconnected from ancestors, familial roots, ties, and practice. There is more for you to have within this lifetime, I think you guys are waking up every day without purpose or without a final destination or something to liven and awaken the spirit as you walk around in your waking life. I just heard "this is no life" too, some of you are coming to realize that something is missing or that you're craving more although it may feel like or seem like you've been very fortunate in all that you've received. Some of you who are masculine energies or are men are living outside of your divine masculine energy and there is a high priestess or some sort of spiritualist around you who see's your light and has told you so or has told you something that reveals that she/he "see's" you or see's something in you.

this could be someone you may be attracted to romantically or physically who won't have you because you're missing what they need, that's very specific but it'll resonate for some of you. I think there's a real need for you to work on seeing yourself truly from an authentic place so that you can be the person or the figure that you sort of see yourself as or envision yourself as some of you are unfamiliar with the term "higher self" as well and you may need to look into that deeper, the term "higher self" is what's defined as the most conscious, most enlightened and most divine version of yourself, this is the version of you that exists outside of the ego, outside of fears, outside of limited ways of thinking and an unawakened version of ourselves that we've been carrying along with us after all our conditioning, our hardship, and our lifetime karma. this is the version of ourselves that is not only living but thriving. there's this imagery I see of someone in a meditative state and becoming more consciously aware and more awakened as they rest. Rest for the body is a means of rejuvenation and growth. This is when the body has permission to shut itself down and repair, it kind of reminds me of the scene in the avatar where they all go to bed at night and are wrapped up in this cocoon-like hammock.

I think you're in a sort of transformative state, you may feel like you're on auto-pilot or like you're sort of powering through your waking life half awake, you may feel more if not completely uninterested in your physical life and it's responsibilities or chronically unsatisfied and restless. You need to work on reconciling with your inner self and inner wisdom and returning home to yourself so that you can learn how to live an awakened experience and a fulfilling life.

guidance:

reprioritize your life or sit with yourself and decide if the direction you're going in serves you or is fulfilling to you and gives you what you want and need within this lifetime. I think a lot of you are living your life simply because you did not have a choice and you happen to just be here but I think there's significance in you finding out what your purpose is within this lifetime. Think about and consider what's most important to you, what aspects of yourself and your life you're neglecting, think about and begin to prioritize your inner world and your spirituality, and live in both the emotional/spiritual realm and the material/physical.

take a moment to think about what you want to do with your life and if what you're doing is what you truly desire, even career-wise. Is there a bigger dream of yours? what do you want to do? what do you want to contribute to the planet before you die? kind of morbid I apologize but seriously. invest your time in self-discovery and when you find out what that is make some important decisions and create a plan for yourself. there is something in your life that works for you but doesn't make you happy or make you feel fulfilled and whole.

embark on your spiritual journey or open up your mind and spirit to the possibility that there's more than meets the eye in the world you're living in, that you have a purpose, that things are happening for you and not to you, that you carry within you, divinity.

release all things that are no longer serving you, that bring you unnecessary stress, etc. you are seeing the world from a very tiny lens and there's more for you in this life than working yourself to death or enduring things "just like everyone else" because that's "just what you do."

#divine feminine #divine masculine #tarot readers of tumblr #tarot readers of instagram #tarot readers of tiktok #channeled message #tarot readings #tarot reading #spiritual enlightment #spiritual nourishment #spiritual alignment #spiritual awakening #growth

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jellymochii · 1 month ago

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My Angel

♱ pairings: Guardian Angel!Felix x F!Reader

♱ genre: fluff, angst, smut

♱ cw: smut, cunnilingus, religious themes, mentions of abuse/foster care system.

♱ wc: 4.1k

↪author's note: Hiya! I apologize in advance for any grammatical errors or if it seems rushed, I'm still a new author so any feedback is greatly appreciated! Hope you enjoy :)

**THIS IS PURELY A WORK OF FICTION AND DOES NOT REFLECT THE TRUE NATURE OF THE PEOPLE MENTIONED**

*Abrahamic-denoting any or all of the religions (Judaism, Christianity, and Islam) that revere Abraham, the Biblical patriarch.

_______________

An angel's task was always difficult, yet fulfilling. Serving at the right hand of the Lord and doing everything possible to assist humans in gaining access into heaven. Some angels, however, we're granted one of the most difficult tasks of all– becoming a guardian to a human.

The tradition of every abrahamic* Religion states that at birth, a guardian angel is assigned to the human, overseeing the physical and spiritual protection of that individual, as well as encouraging them through various methods to turn back to God. While it can be a daunting task for many, especially the angels who were assigned reckless and bold humans, it was overall a beautiful and rewarding experience for many of the angels, watching their little humans grow and live life to their fullest.

While it was quite normal for angels to grow quite fond of their little beings, and even experience love for them, becoming in love with them was something that was forbidden entirely, as it represented otherworldly and ungodly desires and lust not suited for the pure kingdom of God. This was something, of course, that a newer guardian angel would quickly learn.

_______________

Life would always find a way to kick you down, no matter how hard you tried to crawl your way back up. Not a single day in your life was free from pain, even on the day you were born.

Growing up in foster care was less than ideal, switching from house to house on a whim, leaving any friends you may have made in that town behind as you started fresh. Some of your foster parents and towns were much more pleasant than others, but living in a cycle of rejection of adoption from everyone led you to spend 18 years of your miserable life in the care of facilities and strangers. You were never wanted, not even by your own parents.

The only people you ever considered to be your true family were a pair of twins in the same boat as you, Hyunjin and Yeji. Much like you, the two never had any luck with getting adopted and struggled a lot with trusting others after what they'd been through, and yet, they welcomed you right in every time you found your way back to the facility after another failed fostering. Once all of you had turned 18, you collectively decided to scrape together moments from part time jobs and rent out a small apartment south of the city, where you'd been residing alongside the Hwang siblings for a while now.

Since the foster facility was highly faith-based, you were always subjected to weekly preachings and visits from the local pastor. He was kind, sure– but he always said that God had a path for all of us, and that everyone would find peace eventually, and that your guardian angel is always watching over you and protecting you. Despite listening intently every Sunday, that peace and protection from the world you were promised never seemed to make its way to you. You were cursed and cast out in the eyes of the Lord, left being the second option to everyone. There was no way in your eyes someone out there could truly love someone like you. And yet, you felt that there was someone out there who desired nothing more than you. It had to exist somewhere. Maybe somewhere, love was right next to you all along.

_________________

There you found yourself that day, umbrella in hand, taking the usual 10 minute commute to your part time job. The pouring downfall certainly wasn't ideal for walking in, but you trudged through nonetheless, passing through familiar streets that were usually bustling with life at this time of day. It felt quiet, unusually quiet.

As you're about to place your headphones on, hoping to drown out the sound of pouring rain around you, a loud THUD coming from behind a coffee shop quickly grabbed your attention. Normally, you wouldn't give it a second thought. It could just be the usual raccoon rummaging through the dumpster, but something didn't feel quite right. Why did you feel so compelled to stop in your tracks and investigate? Perhaps it was a natural wave of curiosity or something compelling you to walk towards the source of the sound. As your feet dragged you towards the narrow alleyway, you felt something stronger than any rummaging dumpster critter could possibly make you feel, almost as if you were being pulled by a string of fate to peek behind the rundown bricks of the shop.

What you didn't expect to see, however, was a man with large wings rubbing his head in pain sitting on top of piled garbage bags in a dumpster.

You froze in your tracks at the sight as your mind raced. What the fuck was going on? Was your brain playing tricks on you again? Was this a lucid dream of sorts? Who is this guy?

The man’s eyes met yours, suddenly snapping out from his pained and confused state as his eyes widened as his face turned into a state of shock.

“Uhhh, Y/N, can you see me?” He said hesitantly.

Who is this guy? You thought. How does he know my name? And most importantly, how big are those fucking wings? Are they real?

“Who are you? How do you even know my name?!” You shouted, taking steps back out of fear.

“Wait...you CAN see me? Is this real?” The mysterious man questioned as he took notice of his large wings wrapped around him, now covered in dirt and torn white cloth from his attire.

Admittedly, he was extremely beautiful. Warm brown eyes, long golden hair, and sun-kissed skin lathered in a constellation of frekels. Not to mention, the once delicate white fabric wrapped around his muscular arms.

“That doesn't answer my question, who are you and what's with the giant wings?” You retorted.

He paused for a moment as if contemplating his next thought.

“Felix...yeah, I'm Felix. I'm your guardian angel, Y/N.”

“My...what?” You questioned.

He hopped down from the garbage bags he sat on and approached you slowly. Every neuron in your mind was screaming at you to run away, to call for help, but your feet kept you planted as he crept forward, his hand gently cupping your face.

“I’m from the Kingdom of Heaven, I've been with you since the moment you were born, and God... you are so beautiful.” He spoke softly as he wrapped his arms and wings around you and pulled you into a tight hug.

Your mind still couldn't wrap around the fact that a gorgeous man in a dumpster with comically large wings was hugging you like his life depended on it. You felt your nostrils flare up as a stray feather from his wing fell on top of your nose, as your face twitched.

“AH-CHOO!” You sneezed. Okay, maybe the wings were real.

He quickly pulled back from you after the sneeze. “Oh, sorry about these, let me just-” he said as he quickly retracted his wings, almost making them vanish into thin air.

“So.” You said. “If you're really my guardian angel, and you're really from heaven, then why are you here?

“It's...a long story. I made a bit of a mistake, but hey- at least I'm here with you now!” He beamed.

“So then you've seen me this whole time? Everything I've gone through, and everything I've ever done?” You questioned, as you felt your cheeks flare with anger. How could he be real, and how could he let you suffer from rejection your whole life?

“Well, not everything you've ever done, most just the major ones-”

You cut him off quickly with a slap to the face.

“How could you ever let me go through hell and back?! You know all I ever wanted was to be loved, and yet you let me suffer?” You screamed, memories of the past flooding into your head.

Felix hunched over slightly, hand cupping his cheek from the sting you gave him. He crawled away slowly, like a rejected puppy, before he spoke.

“I really...tried my best Y/N. I know you've suffered so much, and it's my fault, really. I was still a young angel in heaven when you were born, and I got assigned to you. I felt every emotion you had and tried my best to keep you safe. It was for your own good...I promise.”

This was unbelievable to you. How was all of that for your own good? The countless lonely nights, praying to God that you'd finally get a loving family, only to be shut out and left to rot in the foster home until the cycle would repeat.

“My own good? How was any of this shit for my own good?! I suffered because of you, asshole!”

His heart shattered. You were everything to him, and yet it seemed like all his dedication to you was worthless.

“I'm done with this conversation, I need to get to work.” You declared as you began to walk back to the alleyway before a voice stopped you.

“Y/N...please. You can hate me forever, but just look at this, please?” He spoke with a whimper in his voice, holding up a soggy newspaper with 2 faces plastered on the front cover.

As much as you were frustrated, you decided to indulge him for once and take a look. The headline of the local paper issued in bold letters stated “BREAKING: FOSTER PARENTS ARRESTED FOR SERIAL CHILD NEGLECT AND ABUSE.”

Once you actually saw the couple's faces, you felt the color in your face begin to fade. It was one of your foster couples. Your favorite one, in fact. The two seemed so sweet all those years ago, spoiling you with frequent gifts and homecooked meals that tasted amazing - it was the rejection that hurt the most because of how much it appeared like they loved you. Were they really monsters this whole time, and did Felix know about this?

Maybe you hadn't given him a fair chance.

“Did you know they were terrible people, Felix?” You asked, almost regretfully.

He nodded, head still tilted down in ache.

“They were evil. They wanted to hurt you, I couldn't let them.”

“What about the rest of them, then? There were... some nice ones, I suppose.” You responded.

“No...none of them were ever good enough for you. They would never give you the life you deserved.”

You felt immense remove and guilt for the poor angel, covered in dirt and in pain from your harm. You'd heard so many horror stories from the Hwangs’ about cruel foster parents in and around the town, and maybe Felix was just doing his job. Maybe he did care.

“Hey, listen-uh, Felix. I'm sorry, I didn't know they were horrible. I shouldn't have slapped you.”

His head slowly rose, warm eyes locking into yours. “It's okay, Y/N. You didn't know. But man...I guess this is what pain feels like, huh?” He spoke as a smile crept back onto his face.

“Listen-forget work, okay? How about we just get a coffee or something.” You remarked.

“Oooh sounds fun! I've always wanted to try it!” He beamed.

________________________

You learned a lot that day, to say the least. Felix told you his life story–about how he died when he was only 5 from leukemia, rising up to heaven and living amongst the paradise of heaven, until he was assigned by the elder angels to become a guardian to a human, a high honor for such a young angel as him. At the very moment you took your first breath, Felix was there with you. While still young himself, he quickly matured and aged alongside you, almost as if you were going through everything with him.

Felix began to tell you how he could sense when you were in danger with your life, and how we knew the moment your mother gave birth, you would be in harm's way with her, hence why she felt compelled to give you up to adoption.

He really did want to see you in a loving home, truly. Yet no one who welcomed you had the best intentions, he'd rather you be alone than in the house of monsters. Call it bad luck, or call it fate.

“So Felix, what grave mistake did you make to get kicked out? Did you try to murder one of my foster parents?” You asked, almost humorously as you sipped your coffee.

“Oh...just a fight with another angel, was all. Not supposed to fight in heaven, y'know?” He muttered.

He couldn't tell you the truth.

The truth that he was cast out of heaven by the elders for falling in love with you.

He's always adored everything about you as a young angel, but as the two of you grew together worlds apart, his feelings grew even more. However, his obsession didn't become out of control until recently. He loved everything about you, inside and out. He loved how you always had your nose stuffed inside a book when you weren't on the job. He loved how your sneeze was so high pitched it sounded like a mouse squeaking. He loved the way you walked, talked, and slept–to say he was a man possessed was an understatement.

Unfortunately, God was all-knowing. He could see his desire, and word quickly got around of a lust-filled angel.

That's when this morning, after a long meeting with the elders to decide his punishment, he chose to come to earth, to be with you. It didn't matter that he would grow old and feel pain, he loved you, and he would do anything to simply bask in your presence.

You decided to keep him in your life. You let him follow you around and keep you company (as long as he promised not to have his giant wings out). At night, he'd find someplace to sleep, which during the cold and wet season broke your heart, so you let him slowly become accustomed to your shared apartment, introducing him as a friend you met at work. You gave him an allowance to buy whatever clothes/shoes he wanted (to which he quickly became addicted to shopping, spending the bare minimum on clothes while splurging on stuffed animals for the two of you.)

You couldn't complain, truly. He was a ray of sunshine, and brought something new to your life.

________________

Time flew by quickly with your newfound friend by your side. While Yeji was a little unsure at first of him, Hyunjin quickly became inseparable to Felix, and frequently taught him how to play video games and cook for the house. Turns out, Felix had quite the knack for baking, specifically brownies, which tasted better than any dessert you'd ever had before. As quickly as Felix came into this world, he'd swiftly become the best thing that ever happened to you.

And yet, there was still something that was bugging you.

How could someone as perfect as Felix in every way ever possibly be cast out of heaven? He didn't have a mean bone in him, and surrounded everyone close to him with his graceful love and support.

He had to have been lying to you about the fight.

One night, while he was enjoying some soup and TV, you decided to confront him. Something wasn't right.

“Felix, can I ask you something?”

“Sure, what's up?” He said as he patted the empty spot on the couch, giving space for you to sit beside him.

You sat down and took his hand in yours. You were desperate to know the truth.

“Be honest with me, please. Why did you actually get cast out from heaven?”

He froze in his spot, face becoming pale.

“Felix...you know I won't judge you, I promise. Hell, even if you murdered someone, I'd still forgive you since you've done so much for me.”

He breathed a heavy sigh, there was no turning back now. He had to know if you loved him the way he loved you.

“Ok…I'll tell you but promise me that this won't ruin our relationship, okay?”

“Of course, pinky promise.” You said as your pinky interlocked with his.

“Well–I love you, Y/N. That's why I was kicked out.” He muttered, face heating up his freckles with a rosy pink.

“What do you mean? I'm sure you do love and care for me, but how is that wrong?”

“No, Y/N. I'm...in love with you. I have been for a long time. You're everything to me, I love every detail about you in ways I shouldn't.”

He paused, catching his breath and staring into your now widened eyes.

“Guardian Angels aren't supposed to fall in love with their humans…” He stated. “It's considered Lust, which is a sin. I'll probably never be let back into heaven unless I repent to God, and to you. Even though I’m head over heels for you, I'll never deserve you.”

Tears threatened to spill from his eyes as he let go of your pinky, standing up and turning towards the door.

“I'm sorry Y/N, I've ruined everything, but I'll leave you alone now.” He whispered as he wrapped his hand around the doorknob preparing to leave.

Only to be stopped by you, as you spun him around and smashed your lips against his.

Your soft lips and gentle cusping of his face made his heart soar back to heaven, leaving him no other choice but to pull you closer and embrace you while your kiss continued.

You pulled back first, almost reluctantly.

“I love you too, Felix. I actually have for quite-” Your speech was cut off by his lips fervorishly smacking back into yours.

A long, drawn out groan came from his lips as your kiss melted all his worries away, ever so romantic and tender, yet wanting more.

The other angels were right, he needed more, a desire like no other was consuming him, making him hungry with lust. To him, just the chance to taste you was worth more than any eternal life he could have, because who needed Heaven when his Heaven was here in front of him? The more your tongue danced with his, the more something he'd never felt until a few months ago burned in his heart. He needed to taste you, he needed to worship the ground you walked on. He could feel his length hardening every second he spent engrossed in your presence, not claiming you as his was not an option anymore, he had to.

“Baby…” He whispered into the kiss. “...Please. I'll do anything you want, I'll make you feel so so good, j-just please let me have you.”

You parted your lips from his and looked deep into his eyes, now expanded from the love and lust consuming his system.

“Then take me Felix, I'm all yours.”

That was all it took for a switch to turn on inside of him, swiftly grabbing you and carrying you bridal style to your bedroom. He laid you down gently on your back, almost as if you were a delicate sculpture, eyeballing your figure attentively.

“Can I?” He asks as he fiddles with the zipper of your jeans. You quickly nod and help him remove it from you, leaving only your delicate yet soaked panties exposed.

Felix wasted no time, as he quickly pressed the pad of his thumb to your clothed clit, rubbing circles at a torturously slow pace, causing you to whimper gently.

“Felix...please, I need more.” You whined.

“Oh, sorry love, I got a little carried away.” He giggled at himself, as he began to take off your panties, exposing him to your glistening and throbbing cunt.

It was more perfect than anything he could have ever dreamed of, and all he could ever want.

He looked up at you with pleading and glowing eyes like a puppy begging for its food, looking for any sign of approval to feast on you.

“Go ahead Felix.”

Without hesitation, his face dived into your needy pussy and began desperately licking stripes up your folds like a starved man. It was truly the sweetest nectar he had ever tasted, he needed all of it. Every last drop.

You felt almost helpless with him devouring you at this pace, a firm grip on both of your thighs as you squirm at his every touch. His tongue turns its attention to your clit, as his lips wrap around it and begin sucking it for dear life. Jolts of electricity were sent flying across your entire body as you let out a series of high pitched, whiny moans, making Felix suck even harder.

“Felix, p-please!I-Its too much!!” You cried out from overstimulation.

His lips released from your clit with a “pop” as he turned up to you. He looked disgustingly beautiful, with puffy lips dripping with your juices, and pupils dilated in an almost drunken state.

“S-so good baby, you taste so good!” Felix said desperately. “Cum for me, please? I need it so bad, you have no idea.”

Soon enough, your fingers guide his head back down and begin tugging against his hair while you drive him deeper into your cunt. Felix can’t help but rut against the bedsheets to your moans, his eyes shutting from time to time from the friction of his cock and the sound of your voice as you cry out his name whenever his tongue hits a sweet spot.

“Oh my god oh my god, Felix please! I'm gonna cum!” You cry out, earning a moan from Felix as he speeds up the already brutal pace, eating you out like it’s the greatest meal he’s ever had. His wings swiftly materialized to hold your thighs in place, allowing him space to bring your body closer to the edge.

One little peck to your clit was all it took to send you over the edge as you released the most guttural moan you'd ever cried out, your whole body trembling as your pussy released the sweet juices Felix desired so much. He wasted no time in licking every spot of your folds clean, drinking it all in as his whole body shook alongside yours.

Your breathing became erratic and heavy, trying to come down from what was possibly the greatest orgasms of your life- when you noticed Felix pulling himself up shakily from his position, taking notice to the newfound stain, and you see why. Right where he was lying down on your sheets, a puddle of warm liquid sat with some running down his leg, with underwear completely soaked. You couldn't help but giggle to yourself as you pulled him into a warm embrace, his breathing still heavy.

“I love you...so fucking much Y/N.” He spoke softly, head tucked into your shoulder.

“I love you too Felix, you're the best thing that's ever happened to me.” You replied, placing a gentle kiss on his temple, rubbing his neck and scalp gently.

Even after only a few seconds, you heard a sniffle followed by a wet feeling on your neck.

“Felix, baby...what's wrong?” You whispered, tilting his chin up so his eyes could meet yours. Tears were streaming down his face, and his lip quivered violently.

“I'm the luckiest angel in the world.” He croaked out through his soft sobs. “I'm glad I get to spend the rest of my life here with you.”

As his soft wings wrapped gently around your body, you finally realized that maybe love was around you this whole time. A sweet boy who loved you and always did his best to protect you, even if you couldn't see it at the time. You were truly grateful to God for sending him to you, and you knew your story with him was far from over. No matter what, you knew he'd always be there for you, and see the best in everybody.

“You really are my sweet angel, Felix.”

#kpop #stray kids #skz #skz x reader #lee felix #skz felix #kpop smut #skz smut #angel x reader #guardian angel

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smhalltheurlsaretaken · 1 year ago

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One thing I do like about TOTJ's take on Dooku's fall is that it really highlights that the Dark Side makes you absolutely masochistic. (Mega long post ahead).

One thing TOTJ establishes is that Qui-Gon's death is absolutely on Dooku (no matter if the show itself doesn't seem to be aware of it).

His tone is concerned and his attitude sympathetic and supportive, but he knows. He knows it's a Sith Lord (he even knows Maul's name). He knows Qui-Gon almost died and is marching right into another trap, but he asks questions anyway and affects ignorance.

"I've been warning them about the coming darkness for years," he says, "never to be taken seriously." Using the Council's skepticism as an occasion to complain about how they didn't believe him while lying by omission is a great case of that hypocrisy Dooku loves denouncing in others. Dooku would rather Qui-Gon share his disillusionment with the Jedi than actually do anything to help Qui-Gon. The Council don't believe him? Okay, Dooku, but YOU DO. You can just tell him what's going on.

But he doesn't.

On some level, Dooku has to be aware of what's about to happen. Qui-Gon is walking into grave danger, and Dooku's response to that - before it happens, when there is still time to stop it - is to put the blame on the people who don't know shit while not doing shit himself. (Why can't Dooku be there to protect Qui-Gon, other than because he's already slavishly loyal to Sidious' plans?)

And this moment puts every subsequent action of Dooku's throughout the Prequels in perspective - particularly his relationships with Obi-Wan, Ventress and Yoda.

Dooku is a glutton for punishment.

I've written here about why I think the 'Box' from TCW 4x17 is meant to parallel Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon's mission on Naboo. The dioxis, ventilation shafts, the catwalks and lightsabers, the ray shields, the fire pit... Dooku's idea of a test to find the best mercenaries around is to have them survive what killed Qui-Gon (what he allowed to happen).

During the challenge, it's pretty obvious he starts to suspect Hardeen is Obi-Wan.

Or at the very least, he's taking an interest in the man who supposedly killed Qui-Gon's own apprentice - Dooku's spiritual grandson (see RotS novelization), whom he's been trying very hard to either recruit or kill himself. And what does he do with that interest? Tries to push "Hardeen" to kill Eval in anger.

Dooku, who still mourns the Padawan he knowingly let walk away to his death, watches a pantomime of his Padawan's death, while putting in mortal danger all he has left of said apprentice. If he knows Hardeen is Obi-Wan (and it's pretty obvious that he does), he tries to get Obi-Wan to Fall (or potentially die) in a scenario reenacting Qui-Gon's death. If he doesn't know for sure, then he's encouraging his all but grandson's killer to win the tournament because he admires him (for killing someone Dooku wanted by his side).

Whatever the outcome, Dooku chooses to relive his guilt and chooses to make the same choice to kill his loved one all over again, even though we know he hates that he made this choice:

He misses Qui-Gon and needs him but tries to kill or destroy Obi-Wan, whom he needs and wants by his side. (I haven't counted just how many time he does try killing Obi-Wan in TCW while still expressing his indefectible admiration for him - it's frequent, the Box just stands out to me as one of the most noteworthy occasions.)

And he keeps doing stuff like that!! He keeps choosing the path that causes him the most pain. He does it with Sifo-Dyas, he does it with Yaddle, he does it with Yoda and he does it with Ventress.

Just look at him confronting Sidious about Qui-Gon's death:

He KNOWS following Sidious got Qui-Gon murdered and he KNOWS Sidious will continue to kill or order him to kill people close to him. And yet he's quick to reassure Sidious that this doesn't change anything. Securing his position with Sidious matters more than his rage and grief. The ONLY WAY this behavior makes sense is if Dooku is fully aware that he had a choice about Qui-Gon's fate, and decides that this is the path he's on now: Sidious might make him kill everyone he cares about, but he's going to do it. Every time, things will play out the same.

Sidious tells him to kill Ventress, his new apprentice? Sure, why not!

(And it's not even out of true loyalty for Sidious, because he constantly tries to double-cross him later on. It's pure self-destruction:)

He hates it, Sidious promises him more of it, and he goes along with it!

This is why Yaddle's attempts at bringing him back don't work, in my opinion:

"Whatever lies he's told you, whatever you have done, you can make up for it now by bringing him to justice." This might convince a man who is looking for atonement, except Dooku isn't. He is looking for punishment.

Killing or harming those close to him leaves him broken, furious or in pain? He'll just keep doing it.

Sidious offers him nothing more than agonizing slavery? He'll keep on kneeling.

That's when Yaddle literally offers him the Light - the light that is so much more powerful than the Dark that it has Sidious cowering, the light that can save him if he wants - Dooku just strikes her down, even though he was heartbroken over thinking he had killed her just a moment ago.

He chooses to kill her, regrets it and hates himself for it, and chooses to kill her again. HE KEEPS MAKING THE CHOICE THAT HE KNOWS WILL HURT.

His remedy to guilt is to pick a shovel, because by God if he hasn't hit rock bottom yet he's going to dig!

#long post #meta #dooku #darth sidious #obi-wan kenobi #qui-gon jinn #yoda #yaddle #tales of the jedi #count dooku

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kali-chaotic-neutral · 1 year ago

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What spirit wants you to know 🔮

Disclaimer: This tarot reading is not meant for you to make drastic choices or actions. Take this with a pinch of salt, this is just me giving advice with my sassy decks. Take the advice you want, anything that doesn't resonate, leave it.

Pile 1:

You may come across a moment where you will have to make an important decision, spirit is telling me that you already know what it is. You will feel tempted to avoid making that decision, shoving it to the back for as long as you can. Spirit is LOUDLY advising not to do so.

Due to you not making the choice, it could lead to bad planning for your future. You will stumble and you will fall hard. This is a warning of sorts to make the decision despite it being a tough one. It's better to change your decision later on in life than regret not making one.

Once you make that decision I can see abundance waiting for you, success, discipline. I can also see an Earth sign being introduced into your life or an Earth sign in your life that is helping you reach that point in life.

With the decision made, you are not only the path to success, but also emotional stability and maturity. Your communication skills are developing, you're setting boundaries. You are getting closer to being your best version.

Pile 2:

I see motherhood coming your way, you may be pregnant/married or engaged. You are becoming more financially stable and abundant, you are in tune or you are being called to accept and open yourself to your Divine feminine self. To love yourself and nurture yourself the way you nurture others.

I can see you celebrating an engagement/marriage/anniversary or even your birthday. You are content with yourself, happy with where you are, I can see that the inner conflict you have will dissipate. Things are looking clearer and better for you. But because of this there could be people around you (not everyone but some) who may be jealous or think you are undeserving of it. Spirit is telling me that you should distance yourself from these people and not let their negative energy try to bring you down.

I can see this celebration could be due to you listening to your inner calling. Spirit is telling me that it could be a spiritual awakening of sorts, maybe you've begun your own Tarot Journey (or anything similar) or you may have a small business that went successful. You have reviewed and evaluated your past experiences and have learned from them.

Because of this, you have created an abundance of love and happiness in your life, and you now share this love with others, expanding your heart even more. You are satisfied with yourself, I can see you being your higher version. You are on the right path. Never doubt that.

Pile 3:

I can see your relationships between your lover or your family or your friends being more harmonious. If you are in a relationship I can see your love taking the next step. Whether it be an engagement or a more intimate relationship. Your values with your loved ones are aligning and you are getting closer and closer.

There may be a situation that will come that will result in your isolating yourself or walking away from the people who do not have your best interest at heart. Spirit is telling me that for too long, you've let people walk all over you, take advantage of you. Not anymore. Walk away from the situation or people, cut them off or set strict boundaries with them. They don't like it? Sucks. Prioritize yourself. ALWAYS.

Due to you letting yourself get walked on for a long time, there might be some closure you need. Maybe from a neglectful parent or a friend that betrayed you and you still don't know why. The longer you stretch out communicating for a final time, the worse things will get for you. You will continue to think about it, continue to let it drag you down. Talk. Even if it leads to tears and a bigger gap between you two, talk about it. It's better knowing and getting the closure you deserve than not knowing and letting it haunt you forever.

With that out of the way, I can see your life being more passionate and filled with life and a new buzz that energizes you instead of draining you. If you're looking for a relationship, I can see an Air or a Fire sign entering your life, or maybe the person has both in their Big 3. This person might come off passionate and fiery but with good intentions.

Pile 4:

Spirit is telling me that you might do good in a job that involves talking, one on one sessions. Maybe a lawyer, or a therapist/counselor or maybe even a professional tarot reader. You have developed your communication skills and your clarity is clear enough to make good decisions. People also may say you're blunt and what you say may hurt but you don't sugarcoat things. And while some may not like that, others will appreciate you not sugarcoating things. Spirit is telling me though that you should try to use your logic most of the time.

While you are painfully truthful, you still have a softer side that allows more flexibility with your judgements. You follow your head and not your heart. And while this can have some viewing you as "bitchy" or "cold", this is you unapologetically being you. While staying like this 24/7 is not recommended. Ensure that you have people in your life that you can loosen up with.

Due to you being so logical and disciplined and hard working, I can see you edging closer to a burn out. Take some time to relax, can be a day if you want or even a week. Sleep in, meditate, take a relaxing walk down your neighborhood. Take a break from what you're doing, let your body and mind reset and relax.

You may have gotten into an argument or you will. If you have, you may have said hurtful things that you regret or you will say things you do not mean. This is alright. I myself call my sister horrible things when we get heated. The important thing is to apologize. Don't let that anger fester, it will explode in your face one day. Apologize, work on your anger (I know it's not easy, I am working on my anger as well) and find some healthy ways to communicate easier.

#tarot spreads #tarot ca #free tarot reading #pac tarot #tarot pac #pac reading #tarot community #pick a pile #pick a photo #free tarot #free readings

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idiotmf · 6 months ago

Note

I like the idea of a shy deer centaur (theyre actually called cervitaur) trying to work up the courage to confess his love for the reader

Hey, anon! Thank you so much for giving me the correct term, first of all. I was trying to find out whether there was a name for it, and my erratic Google searches didn't exactly help.

Second of all, sorry this took a few days. Work has been frying me so much (｡•́︿•̀｡)

No NSFW. However, the usual MDNI does still apply because my blog is 18+.

Melian, the white-tailed cervitaur:

(By the way, the word Vae is meant to be pronounced Vá-é; just a heads-up, it will come up a few times.)

A small ray of sunshine peeked through the window of your weathered cottage in the vast expanse of cedar trees that you called home. The birdfolk once again announced sunrise with a song that you didn't exactly understand, but the longing and nostalgia in it seemed evident, even to a human like yourself.

Refreshed, you sat up in your makeshift bed of straw and hides, pushing your blanket aside to stand up and stretch. Distant rumbling let you know that you should perhaps be a bit quicker with your morning routine today, at least before the storm approached. It was a shame, really.

You had promised Melian that today was finally going to be the day you showed him your favorite spot by the waterfall. The cervitaur was a somewhat new addition to your friend circle, since the deerfolk were usually rather reserved in nature, especially towards things they did not understand, and as a human, you certainly counted as such.

Whether it was by accident or on purpose, one day you ended up in this forest cottage, and however hard you tried to leave these woodlands, it was seemingly impossible. One time you even tried to walk for a whole day, only to end up at the very same overgrown cabin, deciding that it would be your permanent residence, at least for the time being.

As time went on and you befriended the strangely familiar yet completely inhuman creatures of this world, your desire to leave gradually subsided. The birdfolk sang songs at you whenever you passed; the wolf-like creatures occasionally passed by your home to bring you meat and hides; the woodland fairies left you generous offerings of herbs and vegetables. Everyone seemed equally as fascinated by you as you were by them. They even admitted they had never seen a human before and believed you to be a deity sent to protect the forest they inhabited.

Initially, you tried to tell them that you were just a human, not able to protect their home from harm; however, your words fell on deaf ears. One of the tiny woodland fairies, beings made from the elements themselves, resembling more a creation of sticks and leaves than the human-like fairies you had seen in books as a child, explained that it was actually more of a spiritual protection than a physical one. While that both helped and raised more questions, in the end you decided to accept it. After all, what were you going to do about it? No one wanted to believe you were anything but a deity, and the offerings didn't stop either; rather, they increased, and you were dubbed "the humble one."

While everyone worshipped you in their own way, some were too afraid to even cross your path. Among them were the deerfolk, a race of cervitaurs, though their entire bodies were covered in fur, despite the surprisingly human-like anatomy of the upper torso and face. They left generous offerings of their shed antlers in spring, sometimes carved into charms and other knickknacks for you, all while doing their best to avoid your sight.

That was until you met Melian, the deerfolk in charge of delivering the offering last spring, only to end up being discovered by you. From him, you learned that it was a great honor to deliver said offerings, and he had worked hard to even be considered for such a position.

Melian was a bit of an oddity amongst his kin; despite being shy, just like the rest of his kind, he was quite curious, especially in regards to you. Much like all the other creatures of this forest, Melian simply, yet affectionately referred to you as 'Vae', something you had come to accept as your new name, or at least a second one.

In reality, it was more referring to your standing as the protector of this realm, a word that held significance in the ancient language of the forest dwellers; however, being held in such high regard meant that most of them didn't dare utter your name, no matter how many times you insisted.

When you finally managed to meet up with your newest friend after the storm passed, he kept his distance from you, just like he always did, trotting at least a few feet behind you.

He explained it was to make sure you were safe and to respect your standing, but you theorized that he was actually just worried that he would walk too fast next to you or that he was perhaps a little too embarrassed, since no other being had an issue with it.

“It's a bit of a walk from the cottage,” you explained to Melian as you strolled along the path between dense cedar trees, all the way down to a mossy clearing by the waterfall. Along the way, a comfortable silence settled between the two of you; the only thing you heard were the songs of the birdfolk, the gentle rustling of the trees above, and the gentle thumping of Melian's cloven hooves against the earth below. Now and then, you found yourself turning around to glance at your friend, which seemed awfully odd today. His arms, which usually hung loosely by his sides as he walked, now seemed restless, as if he didn't know where to position them anymore. It made you wonder whether it was because of his anxious nature or if something was keeping his mind occupied.

“My Vae,” the stag spoke up after another moment of silence, causing you to jolt and turn towards your large companion trotting behind you, an inquisitive look on your face. He quickly averted his cedar bark-colored eyes upon meeting yours for a moment.

“I, uhm,” he quickly adjusted his gentle, almost timid voice to sound a bit more confident, reverting back to his shy speech halfway through. “I am quite thankful for this opportunity. To, uhm, to see your favorite spot, I mean.” He lowered his gaze to meet your eyes again, his glance lingering a moment before quickly focusing on a tree next to you, barely moving his head while doing so.

“Of course, I promised, didn't I?” Flashing him a genuine smile, you continued to saunter the last stretch of your small journey, leaving him to process for a moment. Shortly after, he caught up, his hooves carrying him with ease, as he took his place behind you once more, just a few feet apart.

Upon finally reaching your destination in what you assumed to be the late afternoon according to the sun, you settled down by the shore of the lake, the waterfall in the distance making the air feel more alive with rogue droplets of water and the loud crashing noise.

“There... There is something I want to tell you.” Hearing Melian's uncharacteristically loud voice be audible over the waterfall ripped you out of your thoughts for a moment, your head tilting to the side, before you asked him to go on. His short tail flicked nervously behind him, causing a small smile to appear on your face. He had always been the cutest out of your friends, and seeing him nervous around you made your heart squeeze in your chest occasionally.

“Of course,” you answered gently when he didn't immediately react to you, stepping back into the forest alongside him to escape the noise of the cascading water for a moment, since it seemed rather important.

“I apologize if this is rather abrupt,” he began, his hands fidgeting, pulling the soft fur of his abdomen in what you assumed to be nervousness or something akin to it.

"The truth is, I... Well, I...” Melian seemed to struggle quite badly now, his head whipping around nervously, making his brown hair follow in turn. You gave him a reassuring smile, trying to be as comforting as possible without saying anything, afraid he might not manage to get the words out if you did say something, even if it was meant to be supportive.

“I... adore you.” The words tumbled out of his mouth before he could stop them, and some sort of dam seemed to break in his mind when he kept talking, barely even taking breaths in between.

“You are kind and gentle to all of us inhabitants of this forest, and watching you be that way makes me feel complete in a way I cannot describe. It leaves me utterly breathless. Yet... yet, when those werewolves look at you in a filthy manner, I get quite upset. I do not possess you, and I never could, of course, but I cannot stop myself from hoping that–” He stopped himself, his human-like facial features morphing into pure horror when he realized what he had just said.

“My Vae, I can...” Just as he was about to begin apologizing, you wave him down with your hand, making sure he leans over towards you, before giving him a gentle kiss on the cheek.

“I thought you'd never tell me,” you grinned at him, his blushing face revealing the fact that he was quite pleased about your actions. Melian let out an almost dramatic sigh before giving you a kiss on the forehead, his short tail almost wagging like that of a happy puppy.

“So, may I assume you feel the same?” Lowering his head a little to be closer to you, he tried to suppress the small smile that threatened to spread into a big grin.

“You may.” Without another word needing to be spoken between the white-tailed deer man and yourself, his face inched closer to yours. Stopping just short of kissing you, his breath mingled with yours, causing a short second of hesitation before he finally closed the space between your lips. No matter how shy and reluctant it was at first, your heart still skipped a beat.

#monster fluff #teratophillia #exophelia #cervitaur #monster lover #monster x human #monsterfucker #x reader fluff #x reader #gn reader #no gender

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fornasedensgudar · 1 year ago

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A starter guide for new norse polytheists.

1. There are manny gods, you dont have to like them all or give offerings to all of them, work with those you feel close to and vibe with. If you dont like a god, then dont work with them, no shame. Try things and dont be afraid to do things wrong.

2. There is no such thing as a bad offering, or to little. A poor mans grain is worth more to the gods than a kings gold. Its about what the offering means more than the offering it self.

3. You dont have to drink or offer mead, its good, but if you cant or dont want to have anything to do with alcohol then thats fine, I recomend honey water and Milk mixed with honey as non alcoholic toasting.

4. Tbh, the gods are not that important for every day, the animistic is more. And if you have a hard time to conect to the gods, then trying to conect and work with with your local nature and house spirits is a good start. They are in no distant realm, but right there with you.

5. You dont have to know evrery myth to have a strong connection to the gods and nature, its good to read and know things but its not a who can read the most contest.

6. You dont have to follow or litsen to others, walk your own path in the heathen forest, and when you feel ready, walk with others if you like, but dont feel like you have to join a group or follow some "spiritual leader".

7. The less money you spend the better, your spirituality should be personal and grounded in what you feel is important. Buy the mead horn and god statue if you like, but your not a bad heathen for not having the space or wealth for a sick as altar.

8. Every forest is a temple and evey stone is a altar, and for you city heathens out there, remeber, the gods are not magically band from city parks and towns. You can conect to them wher ever and when ever.

9. Dont be a natzi!

#norse mythology #polytheism #heathen #pagan polytheism #norse polytheism #pagan #paganism #fornsed

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mswyrr · 4 months ago

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why i think agatha has never walked the Road before

Based on the song lyrics, if she had walked it before, she would have needed a coven to do it, and we have every reason to believe she hasn't had a coven since her first betrayed her.

Gather sisters fire Water, earth and air Darkest hour, wake thy power Earthly and divine Burn and brew with coven true And glory shall be thine

Even if she had previously bamboozled some poor bunch of witches into the Road, if they didn't become her "coven true" in that process, the attempt would have been a failure. Perhaps she has survived a previous, failed attempt, but she's never walked it successfully. To walk it successfully would mean to have community at the end, and that would require her to be changed in key ways.

Another lyric talks about "fate" and another about facing your "fears." If Agatha had faced her fears or fate successfully in the past, she wouldn't be the person she is imo. She's currently someone who is in constant flight from her past, her own feelings, other people. Only Wanda's magic trapped her, pinning her in place, forcing her into community with others. And that has just (for the moment) made Agatha double down on running and using. At least at the surface level.

Moving beyond the specific lyrics of the song, there's two broad categories of how to handle magic in stories. The first treats it like a possession--like a powerful weapon or tool in a character's hand--something that belongs to them and they can do with it what they wish and, pivotally, who they are is separate from it. The second treats magic as something that transforms you -- it's not a tool you wield, to wield it creates/requires a change in your very being. I think the way they're writing magic on the show is the second (to me, vastly superior) approach rather than the first.

The song itself and the use of a Road both point to this. The idea of a walking a path or road and being changed by it is widespread in global spiritual practices -- many religions articulate the religion itself as a road/path to walk -- the process of walking the path is supposed to bring you more and more into alignment with the power/enlightenment you seek, rather than the power becoming a thing YOU own.

Agatha herself is so deeply unenlightened at this moment in her life that she is TREATING the Road as if it is the category one kind of magic. Just a tool or a weapon she can grasp and possess without changing. She's treating the magical commitment she's made to this coven similarly, as if it has no weight to it. But I think she's dead wrong about all of that. That the magic in this story is of the second category, and through walking the Road--and committing to a coven-- she will experience change and find a "coven true." Not that she will become all nice; not that the coven will be all sweetness and light. But that it will simply be real and true.

As Jac herself has said about community:

"I hope what people take from the show, is that yes there is a tremendous amount of benefit from the circle, from the tribe, that you can have communal power, and your can find your own internal power in that circle. But also it was really important to me to show that there can also be in fighting in that circle. And there can also be bad decision-making and backstabbing, and the complexity of these witches no being able to get along. The goal for them (coven) is to harmonize both literally and figuratively, and they fail at it! You know, in a number of occasions, a circle can give you so much. But it's always going to be an imperfect thing." --podcast interview with Jac Schaeffer, quote transcribed by the lovely @isagrimorie (thank you! <3)

Even at its best, community is hard work. A "coven true" doesn't mean easy. Just real and sincere. Agatha lost the "grounding" of herself in her youth (my meta on that is here) and she will be more grounded again.

At its worst, as Agatha learned in her youth, community can become monstrous and terrifying. A prison rather than a home; a death sentence rather than a safe place to live and grow. But even when things aren't in that failure state, it can be painful and difficult -- its own hard road to walk. But on that journey you *become*. And others become along with you. By committing to each other, you are not instantly made whole and enlightened. But you allow yourself to live and breathe and become. To do the hard work of becoming. And it is that process of becoming (of living) that Agatha has cut herself off from by cutting herself off from people.

#agatha all along meta #agatha all along #agatha harkness

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