#the side of corn with your mcdonalds

[intergalacticantics]

Tumblr ads truly are something you can’t experience anywhere else

[theshippirate22]

listen st4 ROBBED us of so so so much, but really I think the the biggest travesty is the fact that we never got platonic Harringham. Like, of course, platonic Stobin is so perfect in every way- i worship it really- and i don’t mean to minimize that AT ALL but like.

Steve and Chrissy absolutely LOSING THEIR SHIT at a football game.

Steve and Chrissy having a crush on the same baseball player and arguing over which pants his ass looks better in.

Steve and Chrissy giving each other the same ??? look when Robin or Eddie say something nerdy.

Steve and Chrissy going to the gym together and losing track of whose basketball shorts are whose.

Steve and Chrissy bonding over the fact that their mothers hate them.

Steve teaching Chrissy to cook and slowly helping her get over her eating disorder.

Steve and Chrissy sharing tips for sore muscles and collapsing on the couch together with bags of frozen peas and corn after going a little too hard.

Steve and Chrissy going for runs at dawn together and getting back long before Robin or Eddie would ever dream of being awake.

Steve and Chrissy throwing the biggest super bowl party ever and screaming and grabbing each other’s arms every time there’s a touchdown.

Steve, who’s been having migraines since his first concussion, helping Chrissy out, who’s started getting headaches since Vecna fucked with her head.

Chrissy offering to drive Lucas to and from basketball because she’s going to the school for cheer anyway, and it’s one less thing he has to worry about.

Steve and Chrissy sitting in on a DnD game, getting bored a few hours in and going out to the driveway to play Horse (Chrissy has never won- she wants the challenge so she never lets Steve go easy on her and he respects her enough not to)

Steve and Chrissy side-eyeing each other when someone has the AUDACITY to say they like the Colts, knowing full well that they’re going to have to dish on the person the second they get in the car (They know the Colts are Indiana’s team. The Steelers are just… better.)

Steve protecting Chrissy from creepy ex-boyfriends who just want to take advantage of her, and Chrissy protecting Steve from creepy ex-girlfriends who just want to take advantage of him.

Chrissy convincing Steve to get back into swim, and him agreeing as long as she gets back into dance.

Chrissy wearing her whole cheer uniform to his meets and sitting on the edge of the bleachers every time he’s in the pool, palms sweating as he flies through the water- Robin and Eddie went to go get McDonald’s an hour ago- eyes darting from his silhouette to the clock and back again, muttering under her breathe, “Come on, Steve, come on!”

Chrissy screaming when he wins, running to the edge of the pool to grab him, even though he’s soaking wet and she spent so long on her hair and “Holy shit, you did amazing!”

Steve making his own sort of cheer uniform to wear to her competitions, always driving her to them so he can hype her up in the car on the way. Calling “You’re a god, you can crush ‘em with your thighs!” as they split up so she can go to the dressing rooms backstage.

Steve leaping to his feet in the audience to clap the second she’s finished, whether it’s a team dance or a solo, or a duo-She’s the only one worth watching- whistling and cheering for her so loud, it would be a phenomenon if she didn’t hear him.

idk

just let Steve have another bisexual jock bestie who won’t make fun of his interests. Who knows how much he wants this, who knows how hard it is.

idk.

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

015 of 2023

Your protein: pork steak lamb chops hamburgers vegan burgers chicken nuggets chicken fingers tuna shrimp salmon oyster crab lasagne ravioli chicken soup

beef jerky slim jims bacon spam buffalo wings sausage ham turkey meat balls

Your dairy: milk soy milk skim milk raw egg boiled egg sunny-side eggs scrambled eggs cottage cheese cheddar cheese mozzarella cheese swiss cheese blue cheese cream cheese plain yogurt

Your vegetables and fruits: mushrooms tomatoes pickles olives carrots raw onion broccoli cauliflower green beans string beans peas black beans celery leek artichoke lima beans bell pepper asparagus spinach seaweed avocado eggplant zucchini corn cucumber squash/pumpkin/yam garlic ginger peanuts almonds sunflower seeds raisins bananas apples pears grapes oranges tangerines peach blueberries raspberries blackberries strawberries lemons pineapples coconuts apricot cherries plums cranberry kiwi watermelon melon pomegranate grapefruit lime guava mango papaya

Your starch: French fries baked potato scalop potato mashed potato fried rice white rice bagel white bread whole grain bread French bread corn bread sourdough pancakes spaghetti macaroni & cheese oatmeal

Condiments: wasabi soy sauce cranberry sauce marmalade grape jam strawberry jam ketchup mustard relish mayonnaise whipped cream honey mustard sauce Tabasco salt ranch gravy caramel peanut butter salsa pepper honey maple syrup hummus butterscotch marshmallows icing

Junk food: cheetos sour cream and onion chips barbeque chips vinegar chips wheat thins graham crackers saltine crackers cheez-its ritz tortilla chips Lunchables Milano cookies Twinkies popcorn fruit roll ups donuts ice cream sandwiches Poptarts pretzels Girl Scout cookies Oreos Nutter Butter Fig Newtons Jell-O rice crispy treats

Cereals: Cocoa Puffs Cocoa Pebbles Fruit Loops Cinnamon Toast Crunch Frosted Flakes Raisin Bran Apple Jacks Corn Flakes Cookie Crisp Cap’n Crunch Lucky Charms Cheerios

Dessert: brownies muffins cinnamon rolls cheesecake donuts chocolate fondue pudding apple pie pumpkin bread pumpkin pie chocolate chip cookies sugar cookies gingerbread cookies biscotti fortune cookies shortbread cookies oatmeal cookies Angel food cake carrot cake cupcakes fruit cake cream puffs flan custard Meringue sorbet s’mores

Asian: ramen cup noodle sushi miso soup kimchi teriyaki eggrolls orange chicken

Fast food and restaurants: McDonald’s Carl’s Jr Taco Bell Panda Express Jack-in-the-box In-n-out Chick-Fil-A La Salsa Dairy Queen Baskin Robbin’s Pizza Hut Papa John’s Roundtable Domino’s Johnny Rocket’s Cho-cho San’s Hot Dog On A Stick Coldstone California Pizza Kitchen Red Robin Ruby Tuesdays Chili’s Wendy’s Burger King Kentucky Fried Chicken Subway Tommy’s The Cheesecake Factory Arby’s Quiznos El Pollo Loco TGIF Applebee’s Wienerschnitzel IHOP Islands White Castle Togo’s Sonic Popeyes Orange Julius Jamba Juice Coffee Bean Starbucks Del Taco Chuck E. Cheese Baja Fresh Macaroni Grill

Candy: Red Vines M&M’s Snickers Hershey’s kisses Kissables Kit-Kat Nerds Junior Mints Twizzlers Tootsie Rolls Jelly beans Swedish Fish Skittles Starburst 100 grand 3 Musketeers Airheads Almond Joy Baby Bottle Pops Baby Ruth bottle caps Butterfinger Reese’s Cup Fast Break Twix cotton candy chocolate coins Dots Hot Tamales jaw breakers Jolly Ranchers Laffy Taffy Lemonheads lifesavers Mike & Ike Milkduds Milky way Mr. Goodbar Nestle’s crunch Payday pixie sticks pop rocks Push Up pops Runts Smarties Snow Caps Sugardaddy Sweet Tarts Tic-Tacs York Peppermint Patties Warheads

Non-alcoholic drinks: Rootbeer Lemonade Orange juice Grape juice Capri Sun Coke Diet Coke Diet Pepsi Pepsi 7up Sprite Mountain Dew Hawaiian Punch Dr. Pepper Apple juice hot cocoa Kool-Aid cappuccinos frappuccinos lattes espresso energy drinks Vanilla Coke Cherry Coke Fanta Arizona Green Tea Squirt Gatorade Iced tea Green tea Chamomile tea White tea Oolong tea Jasmine tea Chai tea Snapple apple cider

Alcoholic drinks: Wine Sake Shochu Vodka Bourbon whisky Irish whisky Canadian whisky Bloody Mary Rum Absolut Brandy Scotch Cognac Tequila Gin Wine cooler Smirnoff Marc Sidecar Tonic Pina Colada Martini Alabama Slammer Daiquiri Margarita Cape Cod Flying Horse Kamikaze Screwdriver Rusty Nail Cajun Strawberry Soda Mimosa Champagne Cascade Fosters Sam Adams Budweiser Coors Harpoon Milwaukee’s Bes

[canonsinthehead]

50 oddly specific headcanon asks. - JJK (Sukuna & Hakari)

I've answered many of the quesitons above but for both jjk characters. Enjoy (hope its not too long)

SUKUNA

How does your muse feel about seafood? since he would eat anything, i guess it doesnt really matter but definitely the type to eat octopus alive with no sauce, no matter the size of the animal. Let's be real, he cant afford on his own dime

What is their favorite piece of technology? he'll never admit it but an old retro phone (i mean that indestructible blue nokia one) is dear to him for being a gift from a good friend. it is the only piece of electronics he can use, afford and keep without getting utterly destroyed.

When did they lose their virginity? Banged a girl before he ate her, you decide if it was consensual...

Was their anything their parents pushed them to do? (e.g. sports, theatre, band) Stay out of jail

Describe your muse’s worst nightmare. For Yuji to beat him in anything especially fighting

What is a deal-breaker when it comes to dating someone? Dating is for bitches

What was the most embarrassing moment in your muse’s life? Sukuna has zero shame but the first time he asked Megumi to "join him" and the teenager looked at him crazy (as he should), that's exactly when he decided that he'll take Fushiguro's consent by force

What keeps your muse up at night? He doesn't sleep

Does your muse get carsick? Never, but Yuji always gets it when he drives

What are some warning signs that your muse is getting depressed?  Doesn't get depressed

What is your muse’s favorite candy? Jawbreakers, and bites into them like an apple & Black liquorice. (btw Yuji likes M&Ms and Sour Patch Kids)

Does your muse have a “victory song” and if so, what is it? Highway to Hell - AC/DC Goosebumps - Travis Scott

Who do they tend to bicker with the most? Yuji Itadori, he is his #1 opp, Public enemy #1. his life mission is to make that boy's life as miserable as possible. he got kicked out making him cry when they were kids and still treats him like an incompetent toddler no matter what Yuji does or no matter how much he improves

Has your muse ever been hospitalized or institutionalized?  No, but should be

Does your muse pray, whether it be to a god or some other force? Actively engage in demon worship in remote locations

Has your muse ever lived in poverty? ironically, he got kicked out of the luxury of Nanami's house to move out to the worst/roughest side of town

Do they have any distinct voice mannerisms? (e.g. saying ‘like’ or ‘um’ a lot, stutters)  holds notes when he speaks, if was from the USA, he would have a Baltimore accent

What is your muse most thankful for? all the handouts Uraume be giving him

What shoe size is your muse? 13.5 with the grotesque long toes and toenails

Does your muse have any trophies? he strips his victims of their valuable belongings and currently wears a man's silver diamond watch

What is the most common lie your muse tells themselves? Megumi Fushiguro likes me

Has your muse ever had a pet? If so, what type? no, he would probably eat them

How does your muse feel about crocs? he wears them all the time since slides (and anything adjacent to that) has been his shoe uniform since forever

What are your muse’s biggest pet peeves? aside from Yuji in general, seeing people happy pisses him off

Does your muse cross their legs/ankles when they sit? Manspread to the end of the earth

What simple task is your muse surprisingly bad at? Cooking, he mostly consumes take out meals and wonders why he's broke

What was your muses’s first job? line cook at McDonald.

Does your muse usually go for truth or dare? There is no dare or truth he cant complete, wait it kinda depends but what matters is wishing he is not the one asking you a truth or giving you a dare. truth= what type of corn are you looking at? *pulls up your web history* dare= jump off a bridge *pushes you*

Has your muse ever been to a concert? he goes to Travis Scott's concerts to engage in demon worship. you can also catch at your local Baby Metal, Lil Uzi Vert & Marylin Manson concert. Yuji made the mistake of going with him at a Kanye West concert and will never do it again.

What is your muse’s favorite holiday? From Halloween to Christmas/Winter Solstice, it's an important time of the year according to his demonic religion

Does your muse reply to scary chain emails/messages? If he sends you one, he already hacked into your computer

Would your muse ever roleplay? haha, you think its RP but he's dead serious

Name a song your muse can sing every word to.  SICKOMODE - Travis Scott YNW Melly - Murder on my mind All Baby Kia songs

Who would your muse sacrifice themselves for, if anybody? He's not sacrificing himself, he's sacrificing everyone else, for himself, for fun, for no reason, for his selfish ambitions & etc.

How long is your muse’s penis? || What bra size is your muse? Average

If your muse could rid the world of one thing, what would it be? Yuji Itadori

HAKARI

How does your muse feel about seafood? he loves it and used to fancy himself with a seafood boil when he could but completely stopped because Kirara is allergic to oysters

What is their favorite piece of technology? his burner phone. it is his #1 business tool. It's funny how he makes shady dealings on a unlocked Sasmsung Galaxy A50

When did they lose their virginity? with his ex but it was nothing emotional or deep

Was their anything their parents pushed them to do? (e.g. sports, theatre, band) his old teachers just wanted him to attend his classes. putting pressure the best they could and going through thick and thin to make him respect the dress code, they gave up

Describe your muse’s worst nightmare. Loosing his sneakers or wallet

What is a deal-breaker when it comes to dating someone? Being supportive, not the blind ride-or-die type but someone strong and reliable. someone he can fight with and be his motivation for improvement. to go further physical/sexual attraction is important as well

What was the most embarrassing moment in your muse’s life? (NSFW) The first time he slept with Kirara was... embarrassing to say the least but he did his research and improved.

What keeps your muse up at night? loosing passion & that fraudulent poker game app

Does your muse get carsick? Yes as a passenger if the trip is above 2 hours

What are some warning signs that your muse is getting depressed?  being quiet for long periods of time. being a calculative person, he does have periods of silence but if he wears the same clothes for more than 4 days without washing them. if he's blasting 2000s/late 90s RNB, he's depressed.

What is your muse’s favorite candy? Hi chew & Creme Savers

Does your muse have a “victory song” and if so, what is it? All of the Lights - Kanye West Flashback - MIYAMI

Who do they tend to bicker with the most? Kirara, not in a mean way because not agreeing is part of beong in a relationship. Kirara is an important part of his motivation and she is always there to check him when Hakari does too much weither he likes it or not. also his adoration for sneakers, she will never understand.

Has your muse ever been hospitalized or institutionalized?  hospitalized, due to injuries he received in fights but will vanish before they flip the medical bill on him

Has your muse ever lived in poverty? He grew up in it

Do they have any distinct voice mannerisms? (e.g. saying ‘like’ or ‘um’ a lot, stutters)  Mostly uses non-formal speech. a lot of huh and the speed of his sentences indicates his mood, the faster the angrier

When did your muse learn about sex? LOL, he straight up called Ivankov to learn more and how to satisfy his partner. outside of that, the internet i guess

What is your muse most thankful for? Having a "business" and being self reliant

What shoe size is your muse? 12 but 11.5 in Jordans

Does your muse have any trophies? No, but cherishes his collection of antique/vintage lighters

Has your muse ever had a pet? If so, what type? Kirara owns a Ragdoll cat, he never had one before that

Who was your muse’s first kiss? with his ex = not serious with Kirara = serious

How does your muse feel about crocs? GET THIS ABOMINATION OUT OF MY SIGHT, I dont care if they are comfy. ok...ok... i'll wear the Yeezys one

What are your muse’s biggest pet peeves? Being a "bitch" and people who engage in useless rambling, talking to say nothing, get to the point.

What was your muse’s happiest birthday? the time he made a trip to Las Vegas for it, only him (& Kirara) knows what the hell happened there

Does your muse cross their legs/ankles when they sit? no, he manspread

What simple task is your muse surprisingly bad at? it's hard (& annoying) for him to explain things if you didn't get them the first time

What was your muses’s first job? dishwasher in a shady ramen restaurant

Does your muse usually go for truth or dare? usually, picks dare. has no problem doing them to the point of not being funny. going from entering competitions without experience in the topic/sport/discipline at hand to eating the weirdest/most disgusting food combinations. He'll do it.

Has your muse ever been to a concert? idk but how can he always put his hands on front row tickets no matter the venue with a "discount". off course he goes to his favorite artist: Yuki Chiba/KOHH, Perfume, Kanye West, Playboi Carti & etc.

What is your muse’s favorite holiday? Ironically, he adores the aftermath of each holiday (2 weeks after Halloween/valentine's day and the month of January). It's the best time for discounts and for financial gain in his opinion

Does your muse reply to scary chain emails/messages? he writes them

Would your muse ever roleplay? Yes sometimes, and also cosplays with Kirara

Name a song your muse can sing every word to. Heartsdales - Body Rock Heartsdales - Candy Pop Kanye West - Heartless Fairies - No More Distance 

How long is your muse’s penis? || What bra size is your muse? A little above average

If your muse could rid the world of one thing, what would it be? Taxes

50 oddly specific headcanon asks.

Send me a number! (some slightly nsfw) || specify muse if needed

How does your muse feel about seafood?

What is their favorite piece of technology?

When did they lose their virginity?

Was their anything their parents pushed them to do? (e.g. sports, theatre, band)

Describe your muse’s worst nightmare.

What is a deal-breaker when it comes to dating someone?

What was the most embarrassing moment in your muse’s life?

What keeps your muse up at night?

What chronic illnesses does your muse have, if any?

Does your muse get carsick?

Does your muse wear glasses/contacts?

What are some warning signs that your muse is getting depressed? 

What is your muse’s favorite candy?

Does your muse have a “victory song” and if so, what is it?

Who do they tend to bicker with the most?

Has your muse ever been hospitalized or institutionalized? 

Does your muse pray, whether it be to a god or some other force?

Has your muse ever lived in poverty?

Do they have any distinct voice mannerisms? (e.g. saying ‘like’ or ‘um’ a lot, stutters) 

Where are your muse’s ancestors from? Do they keep any of their traditions?

When did your muse learn about sex?

What is your muse most thankful for?

What shoe size is your muse?

Does your muse hate their middle name? \ What is it?

How many hours a day do they spend on the internet/watching TV?

Does your muse have any trophies?

If your muse was given the opportunity to go sky diving, would they?

What is the most common lie your muse tells themselves?

Has your muse ever had a pet? If so, what type?

Who was your muse’s first kiss?

What is your muse’s first memory?

How does your muse feel about crocs?

What are your muse’s biggest pet peeves?

What was your muse’s happiest birthday?

Does your muse cross their legs/ankles when they sit?

What simple task is your muse surprisingly bad at?

Did your muse ever own a Tamagatchi?

What was your muses’s first job?

Does your muse usually go for truth or dare?

Has your muse ever been to a concert?

What is your muse’s favorite holiday?

Does your muse reply to scary chain emails/messages?

Describe the first person your muse remembers losing.

Would your muse ever roleplay?

What is your muse’s Hogwarts house?

What is your muse’s first thought upon waking up?

Name a song your muse can sing every word to. 

Who would your muse sacrifice themselves for, if anybody?

How long is your muse’s penis? || What bra size is your muse?

If your muse could rid the world of one thing, what would it be?

[annieandro]

The Alphabet Song

10 Green Bottles

Are You Sleeping?/Frére Jacques/Brother John

Billy Boy

Oh My Darlin' Clementine

Did You Ever See A Lassie

East Side West Side

The Farmer In The Dell

Greensleeves

Hey Diddle Diddle

I've Been Working On A Railroad

Jimmy Crack Corn

Camptown Races

London Bridge

Mary Had A Little Lamb

The Darling Young Man On The Flying Trapeze

Old McDonald Had A Farm

Pop Goes The Weasel

ChopsticksRow Row Your Boat

She'll Be Coming Round The Mountain

This Old Man

Upside-Down World

Froggie Went A Courtin'

The Wheels On The Bus

The Yellow Rose Of Texas

Yankee Doodle

Wait For The Wagon

Twinkle Twinkle Little Star

[demonhanabi]

The Lovecraft Configuration - One Shot

Originally posted to AO3 - July 2024

Night was falling quickly and Leonard grew anxious. He didn’t like driving at night, it made his hands itch and his brow sweat. He couldn’t understand how Penny actually preferred driving when it was dark

He stole a quick glance at the rearview mirror at said girl, she was talking something in a low voice with Bernadette as she cleaned her bat and his mind couldn’t help but come up with scenarios where she talked about all the boys she had slept with or who her new crush was.

His hands squeezed the steering wheel tightly and he focused on the road again.

He slowed down when darkness fell and he lowered the volume of the music as he squinted and bobbed his head side to side trying to find a sign to confirm that they were indeed on the right road. “Howard, are you sure we took the right exit?”

“Lenny, when have I ever gotten us lost?” Howard was riding shotgun, a map opened on his lap, he sounded confident but Leonard still side eyed him.

“How about during the “Empresario” case? Or on that corn maze in Nebraska while we ran away from what we thought was a zombie?” Penny quipped from the back of the van, still cleaning her metal bat.

“Or that time we just wanted to get McDonald’s and you kept promising we were two blocks away but we ended up in another state.” Bernadette didn’t even look up from the book she was reading. How could she read in a moving vehicle and not puke was a mystery to Leonard.

“Okay! So I make mistakes. I’m human, okay?” Howard threw his hands up dramatically. Raj quickly patted Howard’s shoulder and Howard didn’t hesitate to turn around to give the temporarily mute man a side hug. “I know buddy, I know. Girls are mean.” Howard said in a dramatically sad voice.

Penny and Bernadette giggled and Leonard wished he wasn’t stuck on driving duty. This was the last summer before they all went to college and he wanted to confess his feelings to Penny.

He was going to New Jersey because his mom was paying for college on the condition that he attends Princeton and it was too good of an offer to not accept it. His dad and his new wife were nice but they weren’t exactly swimming in money and Leonard didn’t want to take on the burden of student debt.

To make the situation worse, all of his friends were staying in California. Penny would be attending UCLA, Raj, Howard and Bernadette were excited to go to Caltech and he was trying to be happy for all of them but it was hard.

Life was unfair.

“You’re going to get wrinkles Lenny. You still haven’t told her?” Howard whispered to him and Leonard frantically turned to look behind him to make sure that Penny hadn’t heard Howard but she was engrossed in conversation with Bernadette, not paying attention to him. Somehow that made him feel bad as well.

“Shhhhh! Shut up. I’ll tell her…I just need to find the right time.” Leonard grumbled, quickly focusing back on the road.

“Tick tock Lenny. In no time at all she’s going to be at UCLA getting bang-heeeeeeeeeeeey Bernie! I almost didn’t see you there. What’s up?!” Howard’s voice was high, his own unrequited crush obvious to anyone.

Bernadette narrowed her eyes suspiciously at them, making them sweat for a moment before she spoke. “We’re getting hungry, please stop when you find a place to get food.”

“Oh, sure, sure.” Leonard agreed quickly and flashed her a quick smile. Bernadette moved to keep talking to Penny and he waited until she was all the way in the back before he glared at Howard. “See! She almost caught us because of your dumb-stupid-nonsensical loudmouth.”

“Woah, woah, calm down. Nothing happened. I’ve got Bernie wrapped around my finger.” Leonard didn’t miss how Howard’s voice was a low whisper and even Raj rolled his eyes. Howard could easily hit on a random girl but when it came to Bernadette he was as bad as Raj was with any woman.

“Leonard, where are we going anyway?” Penny suddenly called out from the back and he was more than happy to answer.

“We’re going to-uh-hold on.” Leonard reached across Howard to open the glove compartment, he rummaged for a moment before finding a crumpled piece of paper. He did his best to straighten it but it was useless. “We’re going to Wickenburg, Arizona. A Missy Cooper reported that her twin is missing after entering a supposedly haunted mansion. They both came in and she was the only one to make it out.” Damn, his handwriting was bad.

“Wait. Cooper. What’s the name of the missing twin?” Bernadette perked up.

“Uhhhh hold on…Sheldon. Sheldon Cooper.” Leonard turned the paper this and that way, trying to read his own handwriting, he really needed to take better notes.

“No way!” Bernadette jumped in place and made Penny flinch. “That’s Sheldon Cooper. THE Sheldon Cooper!”

“Sheldon Coop-Sheldon Cooper!!” Leonard finally made the connection and he almost swerved into a tree in excitement before he gained control.

Penny rubbed her head where she had hit it against the wall of the van. “For the normal people, can we get a rundown on why you’re freaking out about this guy?”

“He’s a world renowned physicist!” Leonard yelled. “He’s a famous paranormal investigator!” Bernadette yelled at the same time.

Leonard and Bernadette shared a look before he hesitantly started explaining. “Dr Cooper is the youngest physicist in the world. He currently holds the record for being the youngest laureate of the physics world, like he has won every award, I’m not joking. He is currently a teacher at Caltech and rumor has it they’ll give him tenure very soon.” He nodded towards Bernadette to let her know she should say her piece.

Bernadette adjusted her glasses. “Ahem, Sheldon Cooper is one half of the famous ‘Cooper Investigations’ team. Together with his twin, Melissa Cooper, they have unmasked and debunked the biggest paranormal cases in the last decade.”

“Wait, how old is this guy?” Penny interrupted.

“He’s only seventeen like us! That’s why he is such a big deal.” Bernadette said proudly.

“I think they might be referring to his scientific contributions when they say that Bernie.” Howard added.

“Shush Howie. Anyway, remember that case about the ghost truck? They were the ones to debunk it and bring the actual perp to justice. They also debunked the whole fish people cult thing and they’ve been doing this since they were seven!” Bernadette animatedly told the group.

“Well, he can’t be that good if he got stuck in some amateur’s haunted mansion.” Howard sniffed in disgust and Leonard thought he was probably jealous of how into Sheldon his crush was.

“Howie!” Bernadette looked appalled.

“Once we save him you can ask for a damn autograph.” Howard grumbled and focused back on the map on his lap.

Bernadette sighed dejectedly. “He doesn’t give out autographs.” She sounded heartbroken.

“Oh look, a Waffle House! Leonard take us there, please!” Howard smiled woodenly and Leonard was wise enough to stay quiet and start driving towards the restaurant. He couldn’t blame Howard for his attitude, so far Penny looked unimpressed with Sheldon Cooper and he was pretty damn happy about it.

He decided, right after this case, he would confess to her.

“You’re lucky Penny is our friend, any other girl would have called the cops due to how much you were staring at her during dinner.” Howard joked and Leonard flushed with shame.

Penny was beautiful, of course he couldn’t stop watching her.

***

Sheldon grabbed the side of his head. The headache was not going away and he could swear that somehow, in the pressure he was feeling there was a voice. Madness, he was losing it. It was just a headache, nothing more.

He kept moving down the hallway.

Sheldon had thought this was just another case but he had quickly realized there was something different about this house.

From the outside this house had seemed normal. A Queen Anne style house from 1895, well preserved and clean. Windows in almost every wall made it so the house looked bright and welcoming. Its muted baby blue paint job only added to the charm and if that wasn’t enough to declare the house as perfect for living in, the porch swing added a note of nostalgia…or at least that had been how Missy had described it.

This was a perfectly normal house, but as soon as he stepped in he knew there was something wrong. It was noon when they entered the house but inside there was no light. He didn’t need his eidetic memory to remember that just a moment ago he had seen sunlight enter through the huge windows, there was no reason for the house to be this dark.

“Shelly, let me enter.” Missy complained as he blocked the doorway, unable to move. Not backwards at least.

He wanted to take a step back, wanted to run away from this place. But his feet were rooted in place, without knowing how, he understood that he was in another plane and under the influence of something larger than him. He couldn’t allow his sister to enter.

Using the last of his freewill he pushed Missy back and whispered. “Run.” His body had then stepped fully into this accursed place against every instinct telling him otherwise.

The door slammed behind him and it marked the beginning of his torture.

He had tried to go back but the door had disappeared behind him and it didn’t matter what direction he moved towards, it all looked the same. The same wooden and darkened hallway, shadows played tricks on his eyes.

He had a flashlight with him but it only made the shadows flicker and dance in odd patterns. He jerked his face away from a grasping hand only to realize it was a shadow.

Light didn’t behave properly in this place. He turned off the flashlight.

Nothing behaved properly. By his count he had been trapped here for eight thousand five hundred and forty one minutes and yet he had not felt hunger nor the need to relieve himself. He still needed sleep but every time he closed his eyes, whispers in an unknown language would haunt him just right next to his ear and when he opened his eyes only revealed the darkness of the hallway.

He was all alone.

Finally, after an eternity of walking he found a door. The hallway ended into a regular wooden door, it had nothing special about it and yet apprehension grew in his chest.

Sheldon put his hand on the doorknob and he had half expected to feel some sort of pain or backlash from it but there was nothing. The doorknob felt solid under his hand. Cold and real.

Slowly he turned the doorknob but as soon as he did a feeling of dread assaulted him. He suddenly felt cold all over and his teeth chattered, despite not feeling the need to pee since entering this space he felt the warmth of urine stain his pants. The warmth of it added a layer of humiliation and shame to his already damaged psyche.

Gasping, he let go of the doorknob. He was sweating excessively and his body shook with what he knew was adrenaline. He had almost died. He was certain of it, whatever laid behind that door would kill him.

Gritting his teeth he quickly backed away from the door and started walking in the direction he had come from. The hallway was dark and he could only see a few feet in front of him but he would much rather face the darkness than whatever was behind that accursed door.

He walked and didn’t look back.

***

Missy Cooper was a wonderful girl and she and Penny hit it off right away. In fact, if it wasn’t for the looming issue of her missing twin, Penny was a hundred percent sure they would be out in a mall on a shopping spree.

“And that’s when he pushed me and told me to run.” Missy wasn’t crying but her voice still broke. “I opened the door and he was just gone! It couldn’t have been more than 3 seconds from when he closed the door. I searched all over the place but Sheldon wasn’t there. I don’t understand what happened.” She sounded lost and Penny sat next to her and held her in a tight one armed hug.

Bernadette was diligently taking notes as she always did. Howard and Raj were walking around the house as they sneaked peeks at Missy’s legs under the cute sundress the brunette was rocking.

Leonard shifted between asking questions and drooling when he thought Missy wasn’t looking. “Uh, why did you call us? I mean, we’re amateurs compared to you guys.” Leonard asked.

“I called everyone, every group that we knew about, you guys were just the closest.” Missy admitted with a shrug.

Leonard deflated a little. Penny knew that he was proud of their little investigation group and maybe was expecting a more flattering response.

“Did you notice anything weird when your brother entered the house?” Bernadette asked without looking up from her notebook.

“Not really, he was blocking the view with his back and the inside of the house was dark.”

Bernadette nodded before stopping and frowning, she leafed through her notes and bit the end of the pen she was using. “Wait, you said it was around noon when you entered the place?”

Missy nodded. “Yeah, we-”

“And yet it was dark inside the house?” Bernadette interrupted Missy who only nodded once again. “Were there curtains on the windows?”

Missy frowned in thought and hesitantly shook her head. “No…now that you mention it, when I entered the house to search for Sheldon the house was full of light, I didn’t even need to turn on the light switch.”

“Howie, Raj! Search if the house has a basement!” Bernadette quickly ordered before turning to face Missy again. “What if it was a trap set at the entrance? You couldn’t see any light because your brother was walking into a box designed to trap him!”

Missy’s face brightened and Penny was glad to see it, she could tell the girl hadn’t had a good night’s sleep in a while.

Nothing else was said as they waited for the guys to finish investigating.

“Bernie! No basement.” Howard panted as he ran towards them. “We checked and there’s a crawl space but nothing is there. Honestly it’s kind of impressive, it’s all covered in tarp and there’s even a dehumidifier installed. Someone spent a lot of money on this place.”

Missy slumped and laughed bitterly. Bernadette scratched her head with the pen and frowned at her notebook. “Okay. We need to start checking for possible traps. Lenny, Howie and Raj, check the house for any possible hidden rooms. Check for noises of big machinery or scratches on the floor. Go!”

The three boys ran towards the house and Penny knew there were no better people around to handle this.

“Don’t worry, we’ll help you find your brother.” Penny smiled confidently at Missy and was glad the other girl returned the smile.

Penny might not have the same smarts as the rest of her friends but once they found the culprit they would quickly learn why Penny’s nickname was ‘Slugger’.

***

Sheldon woke up with a start. He swatted at nothing as his brain caught up with the fact that he was awake. He wanted to cry seeing he was still in the hallway. A sob escaped him and he slammed his head against the wall twice.

It made the ever present headache worse but he didn’t care.

It had been ninety five thousand two hundred and sixty three minutes since he had entered this realm of nothingness and he was starting to feel his grasp on sanity slip. He had begun understanding some of the whispers but he refused to acknowledge it. This place was not normal, he had long come to accept that whatever this was, it was truly paranormal.

It was beyond his understanding and IT HATED HIM. No, not him in particular, it hated everything.

Shakily he stood up to continue walking, there was nothing else he could do but keep walking. One foot in front of the other. Step, step.

“I leave Sisyphus at the foot of the mountain. One always finds one's burden again.” Sheldon recited out loud. He needed to hear someone’s voice, even if it was just his own.

“But Sisyphus teaches the higher fidelity that negates the gods and raises rocks. He too concludes that all is well.” He walked shakily, supporting himself with one hand on the wall as he slowly walked forward.

“This universe henceforth without a master seems to him neither sterile nor futile. Each atom of that stone, each mineral flake of that night-filled mountain, in itself, forms a world.” Tears ran down his face, he didn’t bother cleaning them.

“The struggle itself toward the heights is enough to fill a man's heart.” He laughed and cried.

“One must imagine Sisyphus happy.” He kept laughing as tears kept running down his face.

***

“No luck Bernie.” Howard said in a low voice. Missy was away from the group, calling her older brother.

“The house is clean, literally. Not a speck of dust.” Leonard had his glasses off as he rubbed the bridge of his nose. He always did that when frustrated.

Penny grimaced, she had hoped the guys would have found something. It had been a couple of hours and so far the house was just that, a house. No secret rooms, no hidden hallways, no hundred year old well with a cursed Japanese girl at the bottom of it.

In fact, why had the twins been investigating this house in the first place? Leonard had mentioned it was a haunted house but it looked just like any other house. She voiced her question to the group and no one had an answer.

They waited until Missy returned so she could tell them.

“The owner claimed that the house was growing.” Missy answered distractedly, looking at her phone. “He said that the house was bigger on the inside and that new doors and rooms were appearing at random.”

The group looked at each other and no one had a response.

“We ignored this case several times, until the owner sold it and the new owner reported something similar. The new owner claimed that the house was alive and that his daughter could hear the house breathe.”

Leonard put a hand to his chin in thought while Howard scratched at his head as he shared a look with Raj. Bernadette bit her lip and leafed through her notebook. Penny stayed quiet, this all sounded insane to her.

“Okay, how about we try the basics?” Bernadette finally said.

***

Sheldon covered his mouth with one hand as he stared at the door in front of him.

This was the second time he had encountered a door and the memory of it was still fresh, he could still taste death.

But he was tired of walking, so tired. He wanted to rest. He wanted to see Missy, he wanted to hug his Meemaw and he wanted to taste his mother’s spaghetti with hot dogs. He wanted to get out of this place.

He didn’t want to be alone anymore.

Hesitantly he put his hand on the doorknob, it was unnaturally cold and a sliver of fear ran down his spine. He looked back towards the endless darkness of the hallway and whimpered. He couldn’t go back.

He opened the door.

Pure and unforgiving darkness welcomed him. It was as if he was staring directly into the absence of everything. He thought of black holes and how they swallowed everything, light included. And even as ominous and terrifying as black holes were, they were nothing compared to the vast darkness in front of him.

He felt light headed and his chest hurt. He had to force himself to take a breath.

Sheldon didn’t know how long he had been standing there just looking at the sea of nothingness but now that he was breathing again he realized that his body wanted him to back away and close the door, to never see this again. Anything was better than this.

Before he could move away he noticed a blinking light in the middle of the darkness. Faint and weak at first until it grew little by little and Sheldon found that he couldn’t look away. Was he witnessing the big bang of another universe?

The light soon formed into an orb and it took him an uncomfortable amount of time to realize what he was looking at.

An eye.

A bright blue eye, a human eye watched him and for a moment Sheldon could have swore that he was both watching the darkness and watching himself from within the darkness. He blinked and the next moment there wasn’t just one eye watching him but many. All shapes and sizes, he recognized some as human eyes, some as animal eyes, rectangular pupils, w-shaped pupils and more observed him. But the ones that scared him the most were those that he didn’t recognize, even glancing at them brought him a feeling of discomfort from deep inside his chest.

He took a step back in fright and all eyes focused on him.

He should close the door, he begged his body to respond but it was useless, he was rooted to the spot. A bug in the sight of a predator.

An eternity passed like that and like extinguishing stars, one by one the eyes blinked closed and the darkness returned. All but one.

The blue eye blinked and Sheldon realized it was his own eye. He had seen it enough times in the mirror and something in his gut told him ‘This was yours’.

Blinding pain and a burst of warm blood forced him to his knees. He clawed at his left eye while screaming in desperation and anguish but the darkness simply kept watching, cold and uncaring.

Sheldon looked up and watched as the blue eye blinked into nothingness, joining the darkness and leaving him.

The door slammed closed in front of his face and he was left all alone in that damn hallway again.

He looked down at his bloody hands and he screamed in rage and impotence. He punched the wall over and over until he collapsed against it, sobbing.

With a grunt of pain he stood up and looked at the door.

Turning around he walked the other way in the direction he had just come from.

***

“Sheldon!!” Penny screamed to the top of her lungs and then stopped to listen.

Bernadette’s plan was simple: they would take turns yelling Sheldon’s name and then listen for any noises. He might be trapped or even tied down but by making noise he would know they were actively looking for him and maybe he would be able to make enough noise that they could follow it to wherever he was trapped or imprisoned.

He heard as Missy did the same in another part of the house. Then Leonard, Howard, Bernadette and then Raj outside the house.

“Sheldon!!” She yelled again as she walked by the hallway that connected the bedrooms to a storage room.

The hallway door rattled.

***

Sheldon sat with his head in between his legs.

He had decided to stop moving. Half of his face was caked in dried blood and he didn’t care anymore. He knew he would die here.

He just needed to wait.

Whatever it was that he had encountered here was far beyond his understanding, it was old and massive. It could eat universes and birth them at will. He was less than a speck of dust to it and the worst thing was that Sheldon wasn’t special or being tortured because he somehow knew something no one else did.

No.

Sheldon had just slipped into a crack. If this thing wanted him dead then Sheldon would be dead, it was as easy as that. But he wasn’t even a passing thought for whatever entity ruled this place.

Sheldon was a parasite lost in a stray piece of hair. Condemned to die and be forgotten. Too small and insignificant to matter.

He laid down on the floor to wait for his death.

Cursed voices whispered to him in tongues he was starting to understand. Seconds, minutes, years, eternities and eons he spent in that manner.

Finally, after the heat death of the universe something new broke through the eternal whispers.

“Sheldon!!” He had almost forgotten his own name. Was that his name still?

“Sheldon!!” The voice was closer now, he looked up and saw a door that hadn’t been there before. Some animal part of his brain forced him to move towards it and open it.

“Woah, careful there Cowbo…GUYS!” Was the last thing he heard before collapsing into something warm.

***

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.” Penny muttered to herself. “GUYS!” She yelled again.

She had found someone, she didn’t know if it was Sheldon or not but whoever this was, he was not doing great as she held him in her arms.

His face and body was covered in dried blood and he smelled like death. He was thin as a stick and his hair was wild and with patches of white and black hair seemingly at random.

“What’s wrong-oh god! Shelly!” Missy was the first one to arrive.

They couldn’t wait for an ambulance so they all jumped into their van and drove him to the nearest hospital. Penny was scared, this was not how things were supposed to go.

They were supposed to unmask some greedy asshole that somehow thought trying to scare people would get them what they wanted only to get thwarted by a group of teenagers.

Now they were driving to the hospital with a half dead boy.

In the middle of the drive Sheldon woke up, his good eye was wild and filled with fear, he looked around until he looked at her, he reached a hand out to her and she didn’t hesitate in taking it.

“Thank you.” His voice was hoarse and it must have hurt him to talk.

He lost consciousness again but his hand had a death grip on her. She squeezed back carefully but firmly and watched as his features softened in his sleep.

The rest was a blur, arriving to the hospital, nurses and doctors swarming them like angry bees and Sheldon being taken away. Missy left to call her older brother and Penny stayed behind, she didn't know why she stayed but she couldn't just leave this boy alone. Thankfully the staff quickly cleared him as being safe and he was moved to a room.

They must have bathed him or at least cleaned him, because he was no longer covered in blood and no longer smelled like a dead racoon. As she sat next to his bed Sheldon stirred awake once more in a panic, she stood up and grabbed his hand again, he looked at her and she could see a flash of recognition in his eye right before he calmed down and fell unconscious.

Missy was back soon after and was thrilled when Penny told her about Sheldon waking up. A new doctor was called to check on the sleeping teen and Penny left to give the siblings some privacy.

Maybe this town had a McDonald’s?

No, turns out this place did not have one. They had something called a ‘Capital Patty’ but it was already closed by the time they got there and so were all other places to get food. It seemed that life stopped in this town after six in the afternoon. With no other options they went back to the hospital and hoped the cafeteria was still open.

She sent the rest on the hunt for food and dropped by Sheldon’s room just to check on Missy.

The tall girl was sleeping on a chair and she was crashing, mouth open towards the ceiling and Penny felt bad waking her up but she was probably hungry herself and might need to step away from the room for a bit.

Of course that’s the moment yet another doctor chose to come in and check on Sheldon and Penny was the most awake of the two so she stayed.

When the doctor finally left Penny collapsed on one of the chairs next to the bed. They were exhausted, but Missy would not leave her brother’s side and Penny felt bad leaving her alone. The poor girl looked about ready to crash herself after the doctor’s visit woke her up.

Penny stared longingly at the door, the guys had probably already eaten something by now, it must have been crappy hospital food but she was jealous of them and she wondered if the cafeteria had coffee, it was probably the worst coffee ever made, but she needed a cup.

She shook herself and focused back on Missy and the boy in the bed. Missy was lovingly caressing her brother’s hair holding back tears.

The doctors had cleared him, he was dehydrated and exhausted but otherwise fine…if it weren’t for his missing eye of course. He had lost it but despite all the blood he wasn’t actually injured. It was as if his eye had simply liquified and ran down his face on its own, nothing they could do. He would need a prosthetic to avoid some issue with losing structural something.

She had been dead tired by that point to pay much attention if she was honest. Long story short, he needed to stay for a couple of days while he recovered fluids, spoke to the cops, etc. The doctor also mentioned that Sheldon would most likely need therapy of some kind to deal with whatever happened to him, not to mention the loss of his eye.

“Thank you Penny.” Missy finally stopped caressing her brother’s hair and took a seat on the other chair. Missy hadn’t stopped thanking her since they found Sheldon.

“I just wished we had gotten there sooner.” Penny was trying to not beat herself up but she couldn’t help but think about all the things they could have done differently. They shouldn’t have stopped at that Waffle House, she should have switched driving duties with Leonard so they didn’t have to sleep in a crappy motel, she could have driven all night, heck she had done that before just for fun.

Missy smiled sadly at her and patted her knee. “I will never be able to thank you enough.”

Penny felt uncomfortable, guilt ate at her conscience. “So when are your parents coming?” She needed to change the subject.

“Our parents died when we were thirteen.” Missy told her calmly and it took Penny’s sleepy brain an awfully long moment to fully understand what she had heard.

“Oh, oh! I’m so sorry, I didn’t kno-wow, okay. I’m sorry.” Penny rambled.

Missy smiled sadly at her. “It’s fine. Car accidents happen all the time. That’s life you know?” Missy shrugged in a way that did nothing to hide the obvious pain on her face.

“I should go get you a cup of coffee or something. You want coffee? I want coffee. No, we need something to eat, I’ll bring us something.” Penny had never lost a close family member and she couldn’t imagine the pain the other girl was feeling and the only way she could deal with this was by not being there.

“Okay.” Missy yawned. “But I need to go pee first, would you mind staying with him? I won’t take long.”

“I don’t mind, go.” Penny said quickly and felt her face heat up. She didn’t know about her parents but she still felt pretty bad about it.

Missy nodded and stood up, as she walked by her brother she touched his foot and said something but it was too low for Penny to understand.

The room was filled with the static and quiet beeps of the machine used to measure Sheldon’s vitals, after a moment Penny stood up and went to check on the sleeping boy.

He was clean and bandaged now, a far sight from the first time she had seen him. His sleeping face was gaunt and pale. Faint stubble dotted his cheeks in what her dad called ‘a bad lawn’ style and it would have been funny if it weren’t for the grimace of discomfort he had even when sleeping. He didn’t move around too much as he slept but it was obvious he was struggling with something even in his sleep.

Penny took a hold of his hand and was glad to see his face soften, his jaw unclenched and suddenly his face looked ten years younger.

If they had taken longer would have he died?

Even in the worst of their cases she never felt truly in danger. She was always able to come out on top somehow. But this experience brought the reality of it all to her face. She could have died. Hell, she and Bernadette could have suffered worse fates than just being tied to a chair for a couple of hours. She was going to college soon, she enjoyed spending time with her friends unmasking dumb people but she certainly didn’t want to do this for the rest of her life. She had larger dreams.

The next person lying on that hospital bed could be her.

Sheldon’s body suddenly lurched up from the bed with a gasp and it scared her to death. She let go of his hand and jumped back, her body unconsciously set into a fighting pose.

Sheldon looked around frantically, seeing but not actually seeing. He looked down at his body and at the electrodes connected to him and he frantically tried to rip them out but he was too frantic and scattered. His breathing was harsh and panicked.

“Hey, hey, no. Stop. You’re okay, we got you. We got you.” Penny moved to stop him and was surprised to find herself struggling to hold him, he was stronger than he looked.

Sheldon struggled for a moment longer before he finally focused on her face and she could see the recognition flash across his eye. “I’m out?” He whispered in hopeful disbelief.

Penny could see the fear plain on his face, the raw animal panic in his eye and it broke her heart. What had happened to him? “You’re out. We got you.” She reassured him.

Hesitantly, he stopped struggling, trying to calm his breathing but he was still looking around suspiciously, as if the room and everything in it would disappear if he blinked. She didn’t let go of him. He focused again on her. “I know you. I know your voice.” Awe in his voice.

“Yeah cowboy. You almost toppled me over.” She tried to smile but the memory of seeing him crumple in her arms was still too fresh so her smile came out more like a grimace.

Sheldon didn’t reply, he looked down at his body and moved his arms carefully, as if he was unsure on how to move. She finally let go of him but stayed close in case she needed to jump in again.

A sudden sob surprised her, he started crying, bawling and it was so raw that it brought tears to her eyes, she swiped at them and sniffed loudly.

The sniff made him notice her again and the look of pure awe and childish worship took her breath away. “Thank you.” He told her in a breathless whisper and it only made her cry harder.

She didn’t trust her voice so she simply nodded and smiled at him.

“I’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mouti’mout” She couldn’t understand him at first but she soon realized he was muttering ‘I’m out’ over and over. As if trying to convince himself.

“I should go get a doctor.” Penny swiped at her eyes again.

“No!” His face was full of fear again and he stretched an arm towards her. “No. Don’t leave me.” He begged and she could see his whole body shake.

“I…okay.” She grabbed his hand, it was so cold. “Missy will be right back, she just went out for a moment.” She ran her thumb over his knuckles in what she hoped was a comforting gesture.

Sheldon nodded and yawned, his eyelid closing against his will and she could see him struggle to stay awake. “I don’t want to go back.” He muttered sleepy. “I don’t want to be alone.”

Penny had to hold back tears and she used her free hand to brush some of his hair off his forehead in the same way Missy had done before. “I got you. No one is getting to you without going through me first.” She promised.

Sheldon didn’t reply but he squeezed her hand twice before sleep claimed him.

Penny really wanted to hurt the person that had done this to him.

***

Cold.

That’s all he could feel. So cold.

It wasn’t the type of cold he was used to, no. This cold was wet and it stuck to him uncomfortably, it made his arms hurt from the inside out and made his legs feel brittle.

He kept walking.

He didn’t want to focus on the cold. His mind warned him against it, he knew that if he focused on it he would be able to feel the cold slither and coil around him like a living thing. For once he was thankful for the darkness of the hallway.

Sheldon kept walking.

***

Leonard shuffled awkwardly in place. He was debating whether to go in or not.

Penny. His Penny had pulled the chair up to the hospital bed and she was sleeping while holding Sheldon Cooper’s hand and it made his chest clench uncomfortably.

She was only supposed to go in and ask Missy if she wanted something to eat, she wasn’t supposed to stay there and sleep while holding another boy’s hand.

They should leave this place, they came and they did their thing. They saved the day. So why were they still here?

After a long and awkward moment he backed away from the doorframe and went back to the cafeteria.

He nodded at Missy as they passed each other in the hallway.

Returning to the cafeteria he found that Bernadette was still reading a book as she ate a cup of yogurt. Howard and Raj had put three chairs together and were sleeping as they held one another. Living in a van for months had made this sight far more common that anyone wanted to acknowledge. Especially for those two.

He sighed loudly as he took a seat across from Bernadette.

Without looking up Bernadette chided him. “If you don’t want her in that room, just tell her. She’s going to tell you go suck a lemon but at least you’d have an answer and can stop sulking, mister.”

“What? No, I-No, it’s not like that.” Leonard flinched like he had been slapped and he was thankful that the cafeteria was mostly empty. “I was just wondering when Missy would be back, that’s all.”

Bernadette sighed in the same way his mother did when she caught him lying and he could feel the familiar sting of shame spread into his whole body. “Leonard…cut the bullpoopy. You’ve had a crush on Penny since we all became friends in first grade. You think I haven’t noticed? You always act like this when she shows any interest in a boy or better said, when YOU think she’s interested in a boy.”

“I don’t-” He shouldn’t have bothered to try and speak because Bernadette just steamrolled through him.

Bernadette raised one finger “Kurt asked her to the Homecoming dance and you sulked for a week straight. Even though you never got the courage to ask her yourself.” Another finger raised. “Last year when we were on that case in Malibu and that hot surfer, Zach, asked her on a date, you sulked for a month.” Another finger raised. “When she was working as a waitress to buy that new pair of shoes she wanted and her mentor was a hot guy, you stopped talking to her until you finally noticed said guy was actually gay. Just because Penny hasn’t realized you have feelings for her, doesn’t mean the rest of us are blind.”

Leonard grimaced as his past behavior was thrown in his face. “I’m not sulking.” He sulked. “I’m just wondering why we’re still here. We saved the day, we’re the heroes, we can move on. There’s not a lot of time left before we have to go back and…” He shrugged and bunched his shoulders as he slumped in the chair.

“You’re wondering why we’re not leaving a pair of traumatized teenagers to deal with all this pain on their own?” Bernadette deadpanned.

Leonard refused to answer and shrugged as best as he could in his position. He knew he was being childish but he didn’t care. This summer was supposed to be for him and Penny to spend time together before he finally confessed his feelings.

“Okay mister, you’re not doing any favors for yourself. You better not let Penny hear this. She was the one that found him so of course she wants to make sure he’s okay. You better lose the attitude because no woman wants to date a toddler.” Bernadette glared at him and pointed with a finger.

Leonard pouted. Why couldn’t he get a break?

***

Sheldon woke up in a panic, flailing at nothing. His breathing was hard and he struggled to understand where he was.

He was lying on a bed, cables were attached to him and the only sound in the room was his loud breathing and the beeps of the machine next to his bed.

With one hand he roughly scrubbed at his face, fearful that it was an illusion but no, he was still in the same room. He moved his sore body and groaned, his back and feet hurt.

Half awake, he looked around the room again. It was a hospital room. He was out? He was alone.

Alone.

The thought made him curl into himself, his breaths came in rushed and hard. He struggled to get himself under control. Tears ran down his face as fear and panic wrecked his body. Sob after sob left his mouth, uncaring on who might hear him.

He didn’t want to be alone.

A shadow fell over him and he pushed himself against the mattress, an animal sound of pain escaped him. He felt light headed, he couldn’t breathe. The shadows were here as well!

Something touched his shoulder and he launched himself off the bed, pain flared all over his body but he didn’t care. Anything was better than being touched by those things. He struggled to get on his feet, he needed to keep walking. His legs refused to listen so he crawled away, away from whatever horror wanted to claim him.

A buzzing sound filled his ears, he could hear his blood pumping, begging him to move.

Something grabbed his face and forced him to look into green eyes. Familiar green eyes.

“Oh.” He said before passing out.

***

“Oh Shelly.” Missy sobbed as the nurses left the room.

Penny rubbed at her forehead in frustration. She had just left the room because Leonard wanted to tell her something and in the five minutes she had been away all hell broke loose.

Leonard had been fidgeting as he tried to tell her something when she heard Missy scream and ran back into the room only to find Sheldon on the floor crawling away from his sister.

Penny didn’t know what to do but her body acted, forcing Sheldon to look her in the face, he had calmed down before passing out.

Missy was a mess as well. She told them that she had come into the room after hearing a noise and found her twin curled up in bed sobbing loudly, she had tried to grab his shoulder but that only made things worse.

Penny really wanted to hurt the person that had hurt Sheldon and left him like this.

“Uh, Penny.” Leonard said quietly and she shook her head.

“Not now Leonard.” Her voice was sharp and angry. Not at him, but the whole situation. She went to sit with Missy and hugged the stuffing out of the crying girl.

***

Darkness.

It was all darkness.

It didn’t matter where he looked, he knew there would be nothing but darkness.

Nowhere was safe, he could see THEM in the dark. Slithering and undulating, the darkness hid their unknowable shapes. He felt them caress him, uncaring and sensual at the same time, he felt as they left a cold and slimy trail on his body. Darkness boiled and he could feel it all around him.

It didn’t matter if he closed his eyes. The darkness was everywhere.

Even inside of him. He couldn’t escape.

***

“I’m sorry.” The sheriff wiped sweat off his forehead with a handkerchief as he walked away.

“This is bullshit.” Penny muttered and Missy squeezed her hand. “How could they have not found anything?!” The sheriff was still close so she said it in a harsh whisper.

Missy shook her head and walked back into the room where Sheldon was sleeping. “Once he’s able to walk again we’re leaving this fucking place and never coming back.” Angry tears pooled in the corner of her eyes.

Penny sat next to Sheldon's bed and held his hand. Like magic his features softened and his breathing gradually became easier.

“Thank you for saving him, I think he knows.” Missy said, cleaning the corner of her eyes with a bunched up tissue.

Penny didn’t reply right away, staring at Sheldon’s sleeping form. “I think I’m done with this type of thing. I want to become an actress and I can’t do that if I’m lying dead in a ditch.”

Missy took a shuddering breath and nodded. “I get it. I was the one that pushed him to start doing this. We were kids and I found it fun how he could find a rational explanation for everything, it made momma mad.” She laughed a little. “And then we kept doing it and somehow Shelly was able to make it so we could make money doing it. After losing momma and daddy we got more into it. I think we were both trying to not focus on the loss so much…” Another shuddering breath. “But we’re done now. Once we’re back in California Shelly’s going to focus on science and I’ll be a waitress or something. Anything but this.” She gestured towards the bed.

“Do you guys have a car?” Penny asked.

“Yeah, we have a Winnebago Camper Van.” Missy rolled her eyes. “Shelly needs an actual mattress to sleep in.” She smiled but it turned watery after a moment.

“Do you think I can tag along with you guys? My group and I were supposed to go to Nevada after this case but…” Penny left the rest in the air.

“Of course. I will never be able to repay all you’ve done. This is the least I can do. Besides…I think it’ll do Shelly good to have you close.”

“Don’t mention it. And I really enjoy-” Penny was interrupted by Leonard clearing his throat at the door.

“Penny? Could I have a moment with you? We have a group meeting.” He backed out before quickly returning “At the van.” He added and left.

Penny looked at the boy lying on the hospital bed and she squeezed his hand twice, hoping that he knew she’d be back. She said a quick ‘Be right back’ to Missy and moved to go find her group. Stopping by a vending machine to grab a snickers bar.

She was still eating it when she got the van, the door was open and Bernadette and Howard were tracing something on a map while Raj was setting up his telescope right there in the parking lot. Leonard was pacing in front of the van.

Penny ruffled Raj’s hair and smiled at him and then said a quick hello to the rest before taking a seat by the open door of the van, her feet dangled slightly over the asphalt as she finished her candy bar.

“What’s up?” She said after a moment of waiting and when it became obvious that Leonard would not speak up.

“What? Oh yes. Penny, we all think that it’s time to move on. We have that case in Nevada waiting for us and I-I mean, we. We think that it’s also time to let the Coopers have time for themselves.” Leonard scrunched up his face and attempted to smile.

Penny said nothing for a long moment, she just looked down and watched her feet.

“Penny?” Leonard asked hesitantly.

“I heard you.”

An awkward silence filled the air. She could feel the rest of the group adjust and turn towards her.

“I heard you.” She repeated. “But I’m not going.” She nodded to herself, sure that this was the right path.

“Penny!” Leonard yelped. He looked frantically at the others but the rest stayed quiet. “Guys, a little help!”

“Why?” Bernadette asked her directly.

“I don’t know about you guys but after what happened here, this is no longer fun for me.” She shrugged and shook her head. “What happened to Sheldon could have happened to any of us. What are we doing guys? How many times were me and Bernadette captured by the bad guys? We have always brushed it off but the truth of it is that we got off lucky, what if next time we’re not so lucky?”

Bernadette looked thoughtful for a moment before she nodded. “Yeah…I…I never told you guys but…remember that zombie case in Nebraska? Well…I…” Bernadette's voice choked out and she trailed off, she cleared her throat but everyone could hear the tears about to burst. “Mr Higgins, when he captured me. He-” Sob. “He touched me.”

Penny didn’t hesitate before launching herself at the shorter girl and pulling her into a hug.

“What the fuck man!” Howard yelled before also hugging Bernadette.

“B-Bernie…” Penny looked up and saw it had been Raj who spoke, he was halfway into the van. His eyes were wide and misty as he looked hesitantly at Bernadette. Bernadette opened her arms as best as she could towards Raj and soon they were all in a hug pile.

Penny stopped hugging Bernadette for a moment to look into her face. “Why didn’t you tell us?” Her voice was raw with pain.

Sobbing, Bernadette did her best to answer. “He told me it was my fault, for being there and, and, and-” Penny crushed her into another hug and cried alongside her.

Penny had felt bad for Mr Higgins at first, she had blown out his knee with her bat and they had told her he would live in pain for the rest of his life. Now she hoped she had done the same to his other knee, and arms and head.

Leonard sat near the open door to the van and held his face in his hands as his shoulders shook.

***

Sheldon observed his reflection in the mirror and didn’t recognize himself.

Thanks to his eidetic memory he would never be able to forget his own face, but the face he saw in the mirror wasn’t ‘him’. He had always been aware of the boyish nature of his face but the face staring back at him couldn't be called a boy anymore.

Stress lines across his face made him look older. His one eye looked muted and sad all the time now. He was a shell of a person.

He moved his head side to side, trying to gauge how bad his hair looked. He had never been a frivolous man but the state of his hair roiled his stomach, it disgusted him to no end. Patches of white littered all around his head, as if a disgusting monochromatic ladybug had taken residence on his head.

Once he was back in his apartment he would research what was the best rated color treatment on the market.

And yet, all of that paled in comparison to the worst change he has suffered. He only had one eye now, the doctors had already removed the bandages off it and the first time he had seen himself in the mirror he had a panic attack. There was nothing in his eye socket.

Pure darkness.

A darkness he was familiar with. Darkness that gripped at his heart and eroded his soul. A darkness that waited for him every time he fell asleep. Missy and Penny had tried to cheer him up but he couldn’t tell them the full truth of why he felt this way.

Standing in front of the mirror he closed his eyes and everything turned to darkness. His heart rate spiked and it took active effort from him to not devolve into a nervous wreck. He opened his eyes again and was greeted by his face.

The doctor had warned him about struggles adapting to depth perception, and while he had nodded along he couldn’t really tell the doctor that he was able to see just fine.

Sheldon covered both his eyes with his hands while keeping them open. He lowered his right hand and was able to see his reflection, his regular blue eye and part of his nose. He raised his right hand again to cover his eye again and then lowered his left hand and was greeted by his reflection, a pool of darkness where his left eye was supposed to be.

The darkness inside his eye taunted him.

Somehow, he was still able to see. There was nothing there and yet he could see just fine. It was madness, total utter madness. No one would believe him, who could?

As soon as he got back to California he would order a custom prosthetic eye, something to cover up the darkness.

He sneered at his reflection and his hands gripped the sink. He wanted to break the mirror, he wanted to rip out the sink and hurl it at his reflection, he was shaking with impotence and anger.

He truly wasn’t the same man.

Sheldon wanted to growl but only a sob came out, defeated, he slumped against the sink. He was finding it very hard to modulate his emotions, he now hated being the dark with a passion and he overall felt lost and adrift.

Being around Missy and Penny helped him to return to a version of himself but things had changed, a massive shift in his universe.

He felt very tired and looked longingly at the bed through the bathroom’s open door, but he shook his head and focused on the mirror again. He still needed to shave, he had asked Penny for a favor and she would be here in half an hour.

Opening the cheap Gillette razor Missy had purchased for him, he began the slow process of cleaning himself up while looking himself in the mirror as little as possible.

***

Penny watched the burning house with detached amusement. She then turned to her side to watch Sheldon and his reaction but he was stoic, if it weren’t for the subtle but constant shaking of his body she would have been fooled into thinking he was okay.

Flames danced in his eye.

Turning back to the house she stared until sirens sounded in the distance. “I think that’s our signal to leave.” She said softly. They were far enough from the raging inferno that no one should be able to connect them to it but she still would rather not be in the vicinity when emergency services arrived.

The only response she got was the distant crackling and popping of the fire. Sheldon hadn’t been satisfied just with burning the house down, the house and its surroundings were being scorched into nothing.

“Sheldon?” She asked softy.

Said man took a deep breath and nodded. “Let’s go. Thank you Penny.” His voice was subdued.

As they walked back to the van she wasn’t surprised by him reaching out to hold her hand. He had been doing that since waking up and she didn’t mind. She squeezed his hand twice.

“Penny, do you know how to dye hair?” She might be imagining things but his voice was a little lighter now.

“Oh! I help my mom all the time, we’ll stop by the grocery store before returning to the hospital. Your sister is probably freaking out by now.”

Penny had technically sneaked Sheldon out as he hadn’t been officially released yet but he had asked her to help him burn down this hell house and she couldn’t say no.

“Are you sure you don’t want to talk to the police again?” She knew he had already given a statement but as far as she knew the police were just sitting around playing with their guns and not doing any actual police work.

Sheldon shook his head. “They didn’t believe me and wanted me to put the blame on innocent people.”

And that was that.

They stopped by the only Target in town and she chose a L’oreal gray coverage dye for him that was pretty close to his original hair color. When they got back to the hospital Missy didn’t freak out, she hadn’t actually noticed that they had left, too busy fielding calls from her older brother.

“Georgie has more of Momma in him than he likes to admit.” Missy said while rolling her eyes in fond annoyance.

“Okay Cowboy, let’s cover up those gray hairs.” Penny was wearing plastic gloves and she kinda felt bad for the cleaning staff at the hospital, she personally knew how much it sucked to clean hair dye stains.

“Make sure you do his eyebrows as well.” Missy called from the room.

“My eyebrows?!” Sheldon looked surprised and Penny couldn’t help but laugh, it was good seeing him like this, without that constant worry on his face.

***

Leonard tried to stay calm, after Bernadette’s revelation they had all decided to just drive back to California, call his older sister who was a lawyer and see if they could get Mr Higgings to do more time for what he had done to Bernadette and then to make sure Bernadette got counseling.

He thought that was the perfect course of action. So why the hell was Penny not riding back with them?

“I don’t get it!” He was pacing right next to their van, only Howard and Raj were with him. The rest had gone to pick up the Cooper van from the hotel’s parking lot.

“Dude, the man is traumatized. You saw how he’s been having random panic attacks.” Raj was eating a cheeseburger and he passed a paper bag to Howard who grabbed a couple of fries from it and nodded.

“But that’s not Penny’s responsibility!” He felt like he was the only sane one. They had only met the Coopers a week ago and now everyone was acting as if they were their best friends.

“Buddy, that’s not cool.” Howard frowned at him and Leonard felt a pang of shame. “You know Sheldon feels safe around Penny, she saved him. We’re all driving back to California and she’s going to be riding with them. ‘Them’ His sister included. There’s nothing strange or suspicious going on.”

“I know! I know!” Leonard couldn’t stop pacing. “Which makes this so messed up. It’s not Sheldon’s fault but can’t I blame him a little?” He knew he sounded pathetic but he was feeling like time was running out.

Raj stopped eating his burger and gave him a hard stare. Leonard flinched, Raj was the sweetest guy and if he was looking at Leonard that way he knew he was in the wrong. “Dude…” Raj shook his head and the disappointed twist of his mouth was like a slap to Leonard. “That’s really not cool. You were the one that never told Penny anything for years! Howard and I told you that you needed to tell her at the start of the school year, you said no. We told you needed to tell her during winter break, you said no. We told you to tell her as soon as summer break started but you said no again. And now here you are, throwing a tantrum because Penny is being nice to a boy she saved.” Raj shook his head again and went back to eating.

“But…” Leonard had finally stopped pacing and he stood still watching his friends. “It’s our last summer together and we were supposed to be having fun but now it all went wrong and I feel like I’m losing her but if I say anything about it suddenly I’m the bad guy!” Leonard threw his hands in the air.

“It would be a whole different story if she was your girlfriend.” Howard chimed in. “But she isn’t, you can’t tell her that she can’t help Sheldon.”

Leonard nodded before he stopped himself. “Maybe I can?”

Both of his friends widened their eyes and shared a look. “Lenny…please tell me you’re not going to try anything dumb.” Howard pleaded.

“I can still confess right?” He asked them and looked for any sign of support. “Right?”

“Dude. I-” Raj ran a hand through his hair in frustration before turning to look at Howard. His friends shared a look that he couldn’t decipher.

“Look, Leonard. Buddy. Do you want Penny to hate you? Because that’s all you’re going to get.”

“But why! Why! Why have things changed?! Why are you all acting this way?!” Leonard begged, he truly wanted to understand.

“Leonard.” Raj said sharply. “We rescued a boy that was being tortured or something very close to it, he lost his eye and Penny was the one to find him. We also found out what happened to Bernie and none of us are exactly feeling like heroes at the moment. I don’t know about you but I feel like shit that Bernie thought she couldn’t come to us to tell us what happened.”

Howard nodded. “We were joking around while Bernie was suffering. I don’t know what to tell you man. Things have changed. Why can’t YOU see that?”

“I don’t want to lose you all!” Leonard wanted to scream. “Before you guys I had no one, now I’m going back to being alone in New Jersey while you guys stay together here! Why can’t you see that?” Leonard wanted to cry, he was angry and frustrated that none of his friends could see how much he was hurting.

“Dude, I don’t want to fight. You chose to go to New Jersey. You didn’t have to, but you did.” Raj threw his wrapper into the paper bag with more force than needed. Leonard wanted to call out Raj, to tell him not everyone had rich parents that could pay for any school they wanted but he stayed quiet. Howard, Bernadette and Penny were all taking loans to go to college.

“Besides, we can still play WoW. We’re still going to be chatting every Friday night. You’re not losing us.” Howard was kinder in his approach.

“It’s just not fair.” Leonard said, looking at the sky.

***

“Okay breathe, I got you. I got you.” Sheldon nodded as he held Penny’s hand. He was trying to slow down his breathing.

They had been waiting near the van for Missy and Bernadette to get back from checking out when Sheldon had another panic attack. This time it happened after a stranger touched him by accident. The man had been walking by Sheldon and for some reason he touched Sheldon’s arm, maybe the man had stumbled but the only thing he knew was that suddenly his arm was being pulled down and he couldn’t see why. It brought back horrible memories that made him feel as if he was stuck back in that darkness.

Damn his eidetic memory.

“Breathe.” Thankfully Penny had been there and she quickly moved him into the van to help him calm down.

Tears ran down his face, he felt weak and worthless because Penny’s hand was the only thing stopping him from fully breaking down.

“I’m sorry!” He sobbed out. “I’m sorry!” He wasn’t fully sure why he was apologizing but since waking up in that hospital bed he had felt like someone else, as if some stranger was wearing his skin and walking around in it.

“Hey, it’s fine. You’re fine. You’re going to be just fine.” He wanted to retort that nothing would ever be fine again, that she was a fool for thinking that.

But he wanted to believe in her words. He squeezed her hand twice.

***

“Penny.” She looked up from her bowl of chicken soup and found Leonard had taken Bernadette’s seat at some point.

“What’s up?” Penny didn’t wait for his answer, she dove right back into her soup.

“I just wanted to see how you were doing.” Leonard kept glancing at the side where Sheldon was speaking with the manager. Apparently his chicken soup didn’t have the right type of noodles. “Because you know, you haven’t been riding with us so we haven’t had a chance to talk.” He fidgeted with his glasses and couldn’t look her in the eye.

“It’s been okay.” She shrugged. Sheldon could be a little uptight when it came to her turn behind the wheel but she liked arguing with him, it brought him away from that dark and muted mood he sometimes slipped into. Maybe he didn’t notice but he was smiling a lot recently.

“Oh.” Leonard sounded disappointed but before she could question him further Bernadette returned from wherever she had gone and kicked him from her seat.

Leonard didn’t approach her again but she could swear he was sulking for some reason. Bernadette told her to not pay him any mind but she still didn’t like how he spoke to Sheldon sometimes. Just because he was in a bad mood didn’t mean he had to take it out on other people.

***

Sheldon woke up with a gasp but before he could even think beyond the fact he had woken up, a hand grabbed the side of his head.

“Hey, hey, it’s fine. We’re in the van.” Penny told him softly.

Breathing deeply he looked around, they were in the Winnebago. Missy was up front driving.

Sheldon blinked and he remembered, he had felt tired after lunch and went to the back to rest. He must have fallen asleep at some point.

Penny was on the mattress with him, she must have heard him about to freak out and was ready.

“Thank you Penny.” He smiled at her.

“You got it Cowboy.” She smiled back and squeezed his hand twice. Sheldon squeezed back.

***

“Leonard, you’re going to grind your teeth to dust.” Bernadette told him calmly and he turned to glare at her but she flicked him in the forehead. Hard. “Don’t look at me like that mister.”

Leonard rubbed at his forehead and stopped glaring at her. “What?”

“You could be sitting with them instead of being all alone in this corner while you eat your sandwich.” She didn’t look amused.

The group, which now included Sheldon and Missy, were eating lunch at a park table. They had stopped by a clearing that had some camping grounds and they all decided to stop and have lunch there, to appreciate nature.

But Leonard was sitting away from the group.

“So what? Am I supposed to stay there and watch as Penny holds someone else’s hand?” He couldn’t understand why Penny and Sheldon were holding hands. The rest of the group were acting as if this was the most normal thing in the world and it was making him go crazy.

“Oh Leonard.” Bernadette shook her head sadly and walked back to sit between Raj and Howard without saying anything else to him.

***

“I’ll call you so we can go shopping, or you can call me.” Missy told her and Penny smiled and nodded.

“Penny. I…” Sheldon kept opening and closing his mouth without any words coming out. “Thank you.” He finally said after a long moment, his words were heavy with meaning.

“You better call me as well Cowboy.” She grabbed his hand and squeezed twice. She smiled when he squeezed back.

They were in front of Bernadette’s house and soon everyone had said their goodbyes. Penny waved goodbye to Sheldon and Missy.

She stretched out her back and gasped as something popped.

“Want to order some Pizza?” Bernadette told her and Penny smiled and nodded. They had returned early but summer was still here. A couple of weeks lying around or going out shopping didn’t sound so bad.

“Here you go Bernie, we’ll go drop off the van at my house and then we’ll bike over here.” Howard said before Leonard jumped out the van.

“Actually, mind if I stay?” Leonard said and some weird communication happened in a moment but Howard didn’t look too happy as he sped off. “Ummm Bernie, do you mind? I want to talk to Penny for a moment.”

Bernadette narrowed her eyes at Leonard and raised a finger. “You have ten minutes, while I order the pizza.”

“BBQ Chicken with-” Penny started but Bernadette waved her off.

“I know, I know. Extra sauce.” She pointed at Leonard again. “Ten minutes.”

Leonard nodded and he fidgeted in place. He had a grim look on his face and Penny was worried.

“Penny, I…”

***

Leonard wanted to tell Penny how he felt. How he had loved her since he first saw her all those years ago. How much she meant to him, how her kindness had saved him more than she could ever know. He wanted to tell her so much.

Instead he put his foot in his mouth.

“So what was all that with Sheldon huh?”

As soon as the words left his mouth he knew he had screwed up. Fury filled Penny’s eyes.

“What is it to you Leonard? Last I checked, you were my friend not my dad.” Penny crossed her arms. “And don’t think I didn’t notice how rude you were to Sheldon.”

“Rude? Rude?! He’s the one that called me a monkey and that he was surprised I made it out of high school.” Leonard raised his voice.

“That’s after you made fun of him for having a panic attack. I’m not blind Leonard.”

This isn’t what he wanted. He didn’t want to fight with her. He wanted to tell her how he felt.

“You’re not blind? Please, what a joke. You’re so blind you don’t realize he wanted to sleep with you! Or maybe you were already sleeping with him? Is that why you slept in his van instead of with us?”

The slap rattled his brain. Penny wasn’t called ‘Slugger’ for nothing.

“How dare you?” She hissed in pure anger.

“Struck a nerve huh?”

Shut up Leonard, shut up. He could see any chances of a relationship with Penny crumble right in front of his eyes and yet he could do nothing about it.

“I don’t know what your problem is. I truly don’t.” Penny confessed and it only made him angrier.

I love you Penny. “Maybe if you weren’t making eyes at every single man you’d notice!” I want to be with you. “Sheldon is just going to leave you like Kurt, or Zach.” I don’t want to fight with you. “I’d mention more names but it would take me all day!”

Please love me.

***

Sheldon sighed in relief as he took a seat in his spot. Missy did the same with her armchair.

It finally made him think that things would be okay like Penny was so fond of saying. Feeling grimy after the long drive he decided to take a shower.

“I’m going to sleep on a real bed, don’t bother me.” Missy declared standing up and moving towards her room.

Entering his room for his shower supplies he immediately froze.

Sitting in the middle of his bed was a book. Nothing else was out of place. Just the book.

It wasn’t a book he recognized, the color was an odd choice. A violet so dark that it looked black at moments. The material was leathery and oddly warm to the touch. No words or pictures were on the cover or in the back.

Opening it he found a small piece of paper with a few words scrawled on it. ‘Knowledge is power.’

Curious, he began reading the book.

‘Norugthaisar The Observer. May his endless sight darken our world.’

Sheldon grimaced and scratched at what had been his left eye, it was hurting.

He kept reading.

[fantasyinvader]

@gascon-en-exil

I know we've talked about this before, about how Cajun food is more well known than the food of Quebecois. I've actually been watching a bunch of videos by a youtuber named Tyler Bucket where he learns about Canada, from our snacks to our fast food places and even history stuff like Terry Fox. And watching this just made me curious about why Quebec's food culture.

As I've said before, Quebec really has a thing for sweets. Like, you do not have Vachon many varieties of snack cakes. Turns out that's because Vachon was bought out by a foreign company and doesn't want to expand into the US due to competition with Hostess, and that's kind of a reoccuring thing. You're also not as big on maple syrup whereas in Canada you can go to events where they serve warm maple syrup on snow. I am not making that up.

Anyway, Quebecois food traces itself back to 17th century French cuisine, adapted to suit Canada with influence from native Americans, British traders and even some parts of American cuisine because of Quebec's history with the fur trade. The poverty of Quebec's past, alongside harsh winters and the condition of the soil all play a role in it, leading to more traditional meals using game meat.

Beans slow cooked with bacon and maple syrup, or a thick pea soup that may have chunks of ham added, that's some traditional Quebec food you can find in your grocery stores. Back when I ran my parent's restaurant, I once had to explain the concept of a “hot chicken” sandwich, as in chicken between two pieces of bread covered in gravy. We have the Pâté chinois, or Shepard's Pie, with ground beef on the bottom, corn in the middle and mashed potatoes on the top all baked together (it's actually one of my favorite meals, especially if there is gravy to top it off with in the event it's a little dry). If I was to head out more towards Eastern Quebec, there's more of a focus on fish and lobster such as serving lobster on a hot dog bun.

That's actually a thing you used to be able to get at McDonald's in the Atlantic provinces, the McLobster, but to my understanding it's one of McDonald's failed menu items like the McPizza (which everyone I've ever heard mention it misses greatly)

(looking at list) I had never heard of Pizza-ghetti before, where it's either a half-pizza served with spaghetti on the side, or spaghetti served on top of a pizza with melted cheese on top... I want to try that now.

I guess that's the thing about Quebec food. We have great sweets and baked goods, but a lot of our food prioritizes practicality and a lot of it is variations to what people were eating in France a few hundred years ago before it became modern French cuisine. I guess with the contacts I have on here that are from France, you come to Quebec you're going to be eating food that would be out of your history books... well, that and poutine. Maybe pizza-ghetti.

[king-minyard]

[ID: Several comments about social blunders people have made. I'm combining screenshots from multiple reblogs. In order,

Spicyratt: Once I told a teenage boy we were going to the executer after his court hearing I meant exit interviewer

leo 🌘: one time i tried to ask a customer if they wanted a receipt and i looked them in the eye and said "do you want me." i cried afterwards

🐌: as a server there was a group entering and i said "i'll come right on y'all" instead of be right with y'all 😭😭😭

Kelsey: A customer once said to me "thank you, have a nice day!" and i went to say "no problem, thank you" and just ended up saying "no thanks to you"

Hardo: I wished a customer a nice weekend even though it was tuesday

<3: once a customer thanked me and i couldn't decide between 'no worries' and 'no problem' so i yelled "no worms!" as they were walking away 😭😭

Sam: One time someone's total came to $4 and I said "that'll be 4 o'clock"

ZOEY <3: One time I was greeting a customer and I accidentally said "hi welcome home" bc [because] I wanted to go home so badly

🌙✨: One time I answered the phone at the vet clinic "hi, this is animals.... I'm sorry.... Please hold..." and then sat in silence instead of holding

ellie s: asked a patient before surgery if he was diabetic and he said no and i said "you will be" ??????

emmabritton892: When I worked at McDonald's instead of telling the customer their total I panicked and said "mmhmm get ready"

⭐🌙MoonStruck🌙⭐: This man asked me where mens boxer briefs were while carrying a lot of stuff and I responded with "sure can I hold it"

Angela Basset: One time someone held a door open for me, and I meant to say "Thank you" but instead I looked them in the eyes and said "Door"

kaine (summrs version): i was working drivethru and thought about if i did magic and when somebody pulled up i just said "check this out" and rang them up and did nothing

crowley's bentley: when i was working at Khol's i tried to ask if they wanted a bag and their receipt but I just shouted "want?" at their face rlly [really] loudly. i resigned

Yudi: I have a lisp and instead of saying hi to a customer I accidentally shouted "HARGH" at her and she went to another register

Meg🦊: Had a passenger order Tito's on one of my flights. Instead of asking single or double i confidently asked "single or tingle?"

kenzie: One time when I was working at chipotle somebody asked for lettuce and i just stuck my whole hand in the guac and didn't say a word for some reason

Nyx: I looked at a bug on the register and didn't realize an old man was standing on the other side, and I aggressively said "be gone with your bad self"

🪐: on multiple occasions, instead of saying 'have a lovely day' I'd say 'havely havely have'

@a-little-bit-bored: told a table here is your porn salad, it was supposed to be prawn and corn salad

@jamgatess: I once was reading the caller ID when answering the phone (name was Curtis) and instead of saying "how many I help you" I said "thanks for calling, how may I hurt you?" / I cried afterwards

@snackerston: Forgot the word for aroma to describe varieties of product, so I immediately substituted "flavor." Customer looked horrified and fled. Realized I was talking about bleach.

@racehill: Not me, but my friend's first job was at a deli. He looks very large and intimidating, but is actually a big softy. One of his first days he meant to say, "how would you like that [sliced or cut]" and instead said "how would you like that, slut?"

@jelly-terror: I once told a customer a cake had cocklate gash

@asliverofyou: While working at Little Caesar's someone placed an order on the phone and when they said thank you I tried to say "you're welcome" and "no problem" and I just said "you're problem"

@the-stars-never-stop-burning: I worked at a barbecue restaurant and at the end of every transaction we had to offer white or wheat bread before shouting "next guest in line!". There were a few times where I shouted "BREAD" and felt like crying every single time

@picklepals: Asked someone if they wanted ass water when i meant ice water. Also frequently asked if people wanted sour cream in their hot chocolate (whipped cream). Frequently.

@erenalias: I have so many of these actually. One time a customer called and I said I was gonna put him on hold and this dude tells me "no the fuck I'm not". Idk what I was thinking cause I immediately went "Too bad!" In my customer service voice and just transferred the line to my manager

@malum-malus: Once when I was a barista, I called out an order at the bar but got stuck between "hot cocoa" and "hot chocolate" and literally just yelled "hot cock!"

@mrsholmez: One time a guy called to place a pick up order and I could not understand him when he said his name and we were really busy so I wrote "Horse." I sent it back to the kitchen before I hung up and heard the kitchen guys go "WHO THE FUCK IS HORSE?" and I was laughing so hard I had to hang up on him. Turns out his name was Forrest. I think about him every day.

End ID.]

my favorite customer service slip ups

[joancoyechina]

Day 2: Arrival in Shanghai

Landed Beijing and were fingerprinted twice in the first 15 min of proceeding through a Health Center, Boarder Control and Customs.  Doing our homework paid off as we had all the requisite forms completed in advance : ) Navigated to the domestic side for Shanghai flight.

Starting to notice cultural differences….lots of caution signs “Hold on to the handrail”, “No Climbing on the sides” “Watch your step”….all these warnings on one small escalator - lol!  Managed my first  my first squatty-potty successfully....it's BYO TP!

Wade procured a McDonalds coffee and we chuckled at their offering of a cup of corn as a snack.  Also....who knew there were fig matcha flavored Oreos?? We’ve already mastered paying for things -with WeChat pay and Alipay (set up in advance).

Speed Racer the cabbie wove in and out of traffic delivering us to the Amara Signature Shanghai.  Our first Chinese dinner:  A mean looking fish and vegetable dishes.  Can’t lie…..it was ok, but not alot of flavor.

Tourist Note:  Download ahead of time the Alipay app.  If you do it before you get here you can connect it with your regular credit card and use it to pay for everything here.  Also download Didi which is their UBER and connects your card with Alipay.  Transportation is easy this way and very cheap.

[menuandprice]

KFC Lunch Menu Prices & Hours [Updated February 2022]

Enjoy America’s best-fried chicken at KFC! The menu of KFC has tons of amazingly delicious items. From bucket meals to boxed meals, KFC has numerous options to have you hooked on its lunch menu. If you’re planning to visit the KFC during lunch hours, read this entire article and enjoy your KFC favorites.  The lunch menu of KFC has chicken tenders, bucket meals, and boxed meals of drumsticks, crispy chicken tenders, etc. You can enjoy chicken tender combos and sandwich combos at KFC. Mac & cheese, mashed potatoes, coleslaw, etc., are the mouth-watering sides available here. You can enjoy a satiating lunch between 1 P.M. and 5 P.M. at KFC for less than $50. Find your nearest KFC or order KFC’s delicious lunch specialties online. You can order the delish KFC food from its official app. Find all the important information in this article below. KFC is mostly brimmed during the lunch hours as happy hours for KFC are from 2 pm to 4 pm. But you can call ahead to have a table reserved for you. Before reading the menu, let’s have a quick revision of the history of KFC. KFC is a famous restaurant chain that specializes in fried chicken and mouth-watering comfort foods. This brand was founded by Colonel Sanders in 1952. KFC’s first restaurant was opened in North Corbin, Kentucky, United States. This restaurant chain ranks second largest in the world after Mcdonald’s. At present, it has more than 24,000 branches worldwide.

KFC Lunch Menu Prices

Have a bucket full of chicken bites loaded with the taste of KFC’s 11 secret spices! Eight-piece meal, side lovers meal, eight-piece fill up, eight-piece chicken bucket, etc., are the most sought-after chicken buckets served here. Tenders served here are perfectly crispy and hand-battered.  Side lovers meal and eight piece meal costs around $25.49 each. You can have an eight-piece tenders meal, a three-piece tenders combo, a three-piece tenders fill up, a four-piece tender combo, Nashville tenders, and many more. You can also try the tenders bucket and choose the size of the bucket depending on the number of tenders you want. The 16 pc. chicken bucket costs around $30.49. You can have sandwiches with sides like biscuits, fries, etc. Sandwiches served at KFC have a super crispy filet with lettuce and mayonnaise. These are stacked in a brioche-style bun. You can choose to have a spicy or classic sandwich with some extra spicy tenders.  The side dishes on the lunch menu are mashed potatoes, fries, mac & cheese, coleslaw, gravy, corn. You can add some extra cheese and gravy to the sides to make them extra delicious. The choices for the dipping sauces available on KFC’s lunch menu are KFC sauce, classic ranch, honey BBQ, honey mustard, hot sauce, etc.  Fried chicken dishes are KFC’s specialties. Among fried chicken dishes, you can have chicken breast combo, drum & thigh fill up, drum & thigh combo, chicken breast, and wing combo, etc. Chicken breast combo has hand-breaded chicken breast seasoned and deep-fried. This dish is served with a side dish, a chocolate chip cookie, and a medium beverage.  You can also have pot pie fill up or bowl fill up at the KFC. The pot pie fill-up has a crispy golden top and costs around $6.29. You’ll love its creamy chicken filling once you crack it open. The filling in this pie has chicken and veggies like peas, carrots, etc., dredged in a delicious creamy sauce. This pie is served with a cookie and a beverage.  Famous bowl fill-up has mashed potatoes in a bowl with gravy drizzled over it. It’s topped with popcorn chicken, corn, and a cheese blend. You can have this for $6.29 and customize it by adding bacon and some more cheese. Among beverages, you can try soft drinks like Pepsi, Diet Pepsi, Mountain Dew, etc.   Follow the tables below for the entire lunch menu of KFC. Don’t forget to follow its social media handles. Check out all the important links and the necessary information in this article. Jack’s Favorites Menu With Prices KFC Chicken Sandwich$ 5.49Tenders Combo$ 7.99Mac & Cheese$ 2.99Secret Recipe Fries$ 2.99Biscuits$ 0.99 Tenders Menu With Prices Sides Lovers 8 pc. Tenders Meal$ 25.49Tenders Bucket For One$ 10.798 pc. Tenders Meal$ 25.493 pc. Tenders Combo$ 6.994 pc Tenders Combo$ 7.995 pc Tenders Combo$ 8.995 pc. Tenders Box$ 9.993 pc. Nashville Hot Tenders Combo$ 7.495 pc. Nashville Hot Tenders Combo$ 9.49Popcorn Nuggets Combo$ 7.4912 pc. Tenders Meal$ 33.9916 pc. Tenders Meal$ 43.498 pc. Tenders Bucket$ 18.4912 pc. Tenders Bucket$ 23.9916 pc. Tenders Bucket$ 30.49 Sandwiches Menu With Prices Sandwiches And Tenders Meal$ 38.49Sandwiches And Sides$ 26.49KFC Chicken Sandwich Combo$ 8.49KFC Chicken Sandwich Box$ 10.49KFC Chicken Sandwich$ 5.49Chicken Little$ 2.19Chicken Little Combo$ 6.39 Fried Chicken Menu With Prices 1 pc Breast Combo$ 6.292 pc. Drum & Thigh Combo$ 6.792 pc. Chicken Combo – Breast & Wing$ 7.293 pc. Chicken Combo – 2 Breasts & 1 Wing$ 8.993 pc. Chicken Combo – 2 Thigh, 1 Drum$ 8.993 pc. Chicken Combo – Breast, Thigh, and Wing$ 8.993 pc. Chicken Box – 2 Breasts, 1 Wing$ 9.493 pc. Chicken Box – 2 Thigh, 1 Drum$ 9.494 pc. Chicken Combo$ 10.49 Sides Menu With Prices Secret Recipe Fries$ 2.99Mashed Potatoes & Gravy$ 2.99Mac & Cheese$ 2.99Biscuit$ 2.99Cole Slaw$ 2.99Gravy$ 2.99Whole Kernel Corn$ 2.99Mashed Potatoes$ 2.99 Pot Pies & Bowl Menu With Prices Famous Bowl Fill Up$ 6.29Pot Pie Fill Up$ 6.29 A La Carte Menu With Prices A La Carte Tender$ 1.99A La Carte Breast$ 4.29A La Carte Drum$ 3.79A La Carte Thigh$ 3.79A La Carte Wing$ 2.99Famous Bowl$ 5.49 Dessert Menu With Prices 12 Chocolate Chip Cookies$ 8.15 Beverages Menu With Prices Pepsi$ 2.19Diet Pepsi$ 2.19Mountain Dew$ 2.19Mountain Dew Sweet Lightning$ 2.19Dr. Pepper$ 2.19Sierra Mist$ 2.19Sweet Tea$ 2.19Lemonade$ 2.19Strawberry Lemonade$ 2.391/2 Gallon Beverage$ 3.99Bottled Water$ 1.99 Complementary Condiments Honey SauceKetchupHot Sauce Dipping Sauces Menu With Prices KFC Sauce$ 0.39Honey BBQ Sauce$ 0.39Buttermilk Ranch$ 0.39Honey Mustard Sauce$ 0.39

KFC Lunch Nutritional Information

Nutritional Informationkfc.com/nutrition-guide Read the nutritional value of all the menu items of KFC from the link in the above table. You’ll also find the allergens information here.

KFC Lunch Hours

You can dine in at KFC anytime during lunch hours between 1 P.M. and 4 P.M. This restaurant chain offers food delivery services the entire day. So you can also order your favorite lunch combos online from KFC. The lunch hours mentioned in this article are in accordance with the KFC in Kentucky, the U.S. These lunch hours might slightly vary depending on the location of KFC.  Read the table below and plan your next family lunch at KFC. If you don’t live near Kentucky, keep reading to know how to check the lunch menu prices and hours of your nearest KFC outlet.  Monday1 P.M. to 4 P.M.Tuesday1 P.M. to 4 P.M.Wednesday1 P.M. to 4 P.M.Thursday1 P.M. to 4 P.M.Friday1 P.M. to 4 P.M.Saturday1 P.M. to 4 P.M.Sunday1 P.M. to 4 P.M.

How To Check Latest KFC’s Lunch Menu Prices & Hours Of Your Nearest Location

The lunch menu prices and hours are taken from the KFC’s hometown. But I can show you how you can check out the latest lunch hours and menu prices of KFC at any location. The best way to do this is by using KFC’s official website. Not just that, KFC’s android app and iOS app also have the updated lunch menu of all its outlets at different locations.  The other way is by using the same food delivery apps that you’ve downloaded on your phone. Some famous food delivery platforms that have the lunch menu of KFC are Doordash, Grubhub, UberEats, Postmates, or Seamless. Now, have a look at the steps below to know how to check the updated lunch menu price and order food online from your nearest KFC outlet.  - On the homepage of the official website of KFC, click on “Menu” to check the updated menu prices.  - Now, click on “Start Order” and enter your location in the above search box. Select the one nearest to you and check out its operational hours. Choose between “Delivery” and “Pick Up” and proceed with the menu of KFC. - Now select all the lunch favorites you want to order from KFC. Review the list after moving all the menu items into the cart and click on “Check out” to proceed further.  - Enter your contact information and choose a suitable payment method to confirm the order. 

Best Lunch Dishes At KFC

1. Fried chicken KFC’s fried chicken has chicken seasoned with spices and battered using eggs and flour mixture. This chicken is then deep-fried and served with a dipping sauce. You can choose to have a ranch or mustard-flavored sauce for chicken, or you can choose to have a spicy BBQ condiment with these chicken bites. 2. Chicken Drumsticks KFC’s chicken drumsticks have chicken dredged in beaten eggs and flour mixture. The chicken is filled with the flavors of KFC’s 11 spices and is deep-fried until it’s golden brown and crispy. This dish can be enjoyed as and main course dish and is paired with ranch and any other side dish.  3. Chicken Tenders KFC chicken tenders have chicken breast strips marinated in buttermilk and a hot sauce mixture. These chicken tenders are then handspun in eggs and flour mixture. You can have these chicken tenders with a condiment and a beverage of your choice.  4. Nashville Hot Chicken For a fiery and spicy take on fried chicken, try Nashville hot chicken. This dish has chicken coated with eggs and flour mixture. This chicken is infused with the flavors of KFC’s secret herbs and spices, pickle juice, buttermilk, hot sauce, chili powder, salt, etc. This dish is served with pickles and a side dish of choice. 5. KFC Bowl KFC’s bowl has mashed potatoes with gravy drizzled on top. This bowl has corn and shredded cheese on top. You can choose to have some extra bacon and cheese in your KFC bowl. KFC bowl serves as a perfect side dish with any main course dish at KFC.

Conclusion

Enjoy your lunch at KFC, having a bucket of wings, crispy fries, and refreshing drinks! Try all the lunch specials mentioned above at KFC. You can also check out the breakfast menu and hours or dinner menu prices and hours of KFC on our website. Feel free to read some of the best copycat recipes of KFC on our platform. 

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs)

What is KFC famous for? KFC is famous for fried chicken, crispy chicken tender, and KFC bowl.  What are the best lunch dishes served at KFC? The best lunch dishes served at KFC are fried chicken, chicken drumsticks, chicken tenders, Nashville hot chicken, and KFC bowl.  Does KFC offer any traditional holiday dishes? No, KFC does not offer any traditional holiday dishes on its menu.  Can we order food online from KFC? Yes, KFC accepts online orders from its official website and its official app. You can also use other food delivery services like Doordash, UberEats, Grubhub, Postmates, or Seamless, to order KFC dishes online.  What are the lunch hours of KFC? KFC serves lunch between 1 P.M. and 4 P.M. at most locations. The timings for lunch might slightly vary at some of its restaurants depending upon the location.  Read the full article

[nourishr]

staying fruitarian outside.

as with any lifestyle change it’s easiest to stay on track at home!

the challenges start when one friend invites you to the steak house and the other wants to run into a coffee shop for a quick snack. the buttery croissant looks so appetizing… then your stomach is hurting 20 minutes later and you wake up with pimples•.•

this doesn’t have to be you♡

mindset and prep

before heading out make sure you’ve had a satisfying fruit meal (at least 400 calories) so your body doesn’t crave overstimulating, processed junk.

bring bottle full of green smoothie and or chopped fruit whenever you go out.

take pride in leading an alternative lifestyle of health and abundance. if you were to eat like the majority, you’d get their illnesses too. you’ve chosen differently!

look up the menu if you’re going to lunch and skim for all salads, vegan/vegetarian dishes, fruits, vegetables, nuts, and seeds on the menu so people aren’t waiting on you to order

think of finding places to eat raw vegan like a game, a treasure hunt!

choosing where to eat

look for:

juice, smoothie, salad bars

healthy/clean restaurants

japanese and vietnamese restaurants

crêpe and dessert restaurants. you can order big bowls of fruit there•.•

grocery stores. pre chopped fruit, dates, bananas, and kombucha require no washing

health food stores (though the packaged snacks may be higher in fat so exercise caution)

raw vegan restaurants!!

at restaurants you didn’t choose

you have 2 options:

you can make a custom dish out of select menu ingredients.

example: on the menu you see steak listed with a side of kale and potatoes, a keto-friendly dish with avocado, and a dessert topped with bananas and berries. order a bowl of berries and banana + a salad of kale, 1/2 avocado and lemon juice. order another round if you’re still hungry (but you probably won’t if you ate before).

or you can modify a menu item.

example: I ordered a “make it yourself” salad which requires you to choose a grain. I requested no grains to be added and they brought this decadent raw bowl of shredded carrot, kimchi, green peas, avocado, marinated tomato, baby kale, baby spinach, red onion, corn, coconut flakes , and lemon juice.

the smoothie was beets, banana, pineapple, ginger, lemon, and flax♡ my friend is not raw hence the pie and croissant

fast food and cafes (canadian)

skim for fruits and vegetables

there may be smoothies you can order without dairy or a healthy kids menu

herbal teas

starbucks

martin’s dehydrated apple chips

herbal tea

mcdonald’s

apple chunks

baby carrots

strawberry banana smoothie no yogurt

blueberry pomegranate smoothie no yogurt

mango pineapple smoothie no yogurt

coconut pineapple smoothie no yogurt

herbal tea

wendy’s

garden side salad. add strawberries, apple chunks, and extra tomatoes on top, with avocado on the side. hold the cheese, dressing and croutons.

enjoy exploring your world as a raw vegan🤍

reblog and follow for more clean eating and lifestyle posts x

[garbagevanfleet]

Brightest Blue (series)

PART ONE

Pairing: Josh & female!Reader Warnings:  None yet.  Summary: Things are changing. New state. New school. New roommate. You just pray things are going to click into place. Notes: Here we are everyone. This fic has been a long time in the making, but I’m pretty dang happy with it so far! I made Josh extra lovable and squishy for you all. I hope you enjoy! This fic is edited by the amazing and gorgeous, @lantern-inthenight. And big thanks as always to @myownparadise96. I literally could not have found the motivation to do this fic without you. 

MASTERPOST 

taglist: @myownparadise96 @n1-party-anthem @valleyd0ll @bigblack-catattack @guitarfingers @thebohemianpenguin @oblvions @hansonobsessed​ @satingrass-maidensfair​

The scenery in Michigan was vastly different than back home. You were used to and comfortable with the nearly unforgiving heat of the American South West, but the farther away you got from home, the more foreign everything seemed. The scrubland slowly started being replaced by emerald green grass and dense forests of towering pines. Once you hit Illinois, little farmsteads were scattered along every road you took, boasting fields thick with corn and beans. 

It was a bit over a full day’s worth of driving. You had originally thought you could just drive right through - after all, you were young and you had plenty of caffeine at the ready. In reality, you wound up digesting the trip over two days. 

You were a fortunate enough person that you had a reliable car, which made up for the fact that it wasn’t very pretty to look at. It didn’t exactly sip gas, but that had never even been a concern before this - it wasn’t very often that you left home, let alone make a trip across the country. But you were able to breathe a sigh of relief when you started seeing the exit signs for Ann Arbor. 

Your parents had been a bit judgemental about you picking a school so far away - they were even worse homebodies than you, and they knew that you being across the country meant they wouldn’t be seeing you until the school year was over - but there was no way you could turn down an opportunity like this one. You had worked your ass off to qualify for a scholarship, knowing full well that there was no way you could afford higher education otherwise. MU hadn’t been your very first choice but with one of the better programs in the country for your desired field, you just couldn’t turn it down. 

You had to pull over into a McDonald’s parking lot to pull up the address you were looking for and program it into your phone’s GPS before continuing further into the city. Your mother had been particularly wary about your living situation. See, she was a woman that adamantly liked to have a plan and then stick to it - she didn’t see any value in just letting things happen. “Go with the flow” wasn’t in her vocabulary, but you’d always romanticised the idea. Which was why, when you pulled up to the apartment that you were going to be living in for the next year, it was the first time you’d ever seen it. 

You had found the listing on the Facebook marketplace for the area, looked at a couple of pictures, and signed the lease agreement online - all without knowing what you were really in for. You’d been informed that you’d have a roommate when you’d contacted the landlord, but she hadn’t mentioned a thing about the person other than that. All she really said was “no pets, no smoking, and one month’s rent for the security deposit. You had told yourself that it didn’t really matter what the situation was as long as the other person wasn’t outwardly malicious and the place wasn’t infested with pests or anything, even though you knew it mattered a little. 

An audible sigh of relief left your lips when you pulled into the apartment parking lot and found that your new home looked well kept. The building had old, slide-up windows, but the brick siding was clean, and the shrubs that lined the property were trimmed and neat. You and your back seat stuffed to max capacity with house plants had made it - and with only a bit of sleep deprivation and caffeine jitters for damages. 

After you got out of the car, you grabbed your very favorite potted cactus and found your way into the building, meandering down the dim hall until you came upon the door marked 6. You hadn’t been given a key yet, so you knocked with your free hand and waited until you heard someone shuffling around inside.

You would be lying if you said you weren’t nervous - obviously, you were - but more than anything you were excited. Anxious, maybe? That seemed like the right word. 

The door opened to reveal a boy, around your age, hair a mess of curls on the top and shorn tighter to the sides of his head. You were immediately taken aback by the depth in his eyes, chocolatey and warm. 

“What’s up?” he asked casually, leaning against the door frame, a pair of old-school headphones dangling from his hand. 

You frowned at him slightly, suddenly terrified you’d gotten the wrong apartment number. You weren’t sure how you’d live with that embarrassment, especially if you had to live next door to him - you’d just be that stupid girl that didn’t even know where she lived.  “Oh, I think I’m your new roommate? This is number six, right?” You peered around the other side of the open door, just to confirm.

A beaming grin spread over his soft face, showing you his blindingly white teeth and the deepest pair of dimples you’d ever seen. “Oh, cool, yeah. Come on in.”

He stepped aside, giving a dramatically flourished bow as a gesture for you to enter. You obliged, and even though this was your new house too, you paused and waited as he shut the door behind you. 

“Sorry, I was expecting you yesterday, so.” He trailed off with a sheepish smile and then extended his free hand to you. “Anyway, I’m Josh.” 

You shifted your cactus to one arm so you could shake his hand. “Y/N. Yeah, sorry, it took me longer than I expected to get here. Which is why my stuff apparently showed up before I did.”

You eyed around the apartment, spotting boxes of your things in piles. The original plan your parents had come up with was to have you rent a U-Haul, but since you’d never driven anything bigger than your Camry, you had quickly shot that idea down. After some expert negotiating, they had agreed to hire a moving company. You hadn’t had the balls to ask what a service like that had set them back - decided instead that it was better if you didn’t know. 

“Oh yeah,” he replied, rubbing at the back of his neck. “It all showed up yesterday at like noon. One of the boxes was open a little, and I saw records so I looked through them to make sure you weren’t some kind of freak.”

It was more of a statement than a warning, and the smile he gave you showed not even a shred of an apology so you just smiled back. “Find anything you like?”

He turned on his heel and headed into the kitchen - connected to the living room by a huge square archway. “Your music taste is,” He paused, opening a cupboard and pulling down two mismatched glasses. “Eclectic.”

You laughed at him, bending to gently set your plant down on a side table. “That’s true.” 

“But I found plenty I could listen to, so I guess you’re okay. You want some juice?” he asked as he held up a paper carton of store brand orange juice

. 

“That would be lovely,” you agreed, standing stick straight the way you did when in the presence of new company. “My dad used to take me to a lot of thrift stores and we’d go home with a minimum of two records per trip.”

“I love thrifting,” he said simply, giving you an alarmingly serious look. “There are three here, I think. Every once in a while you can find something really worth keeping. I have kind of a ‘catch and release’ policy where if I don’t instantly know what I’m going to do with an item, I leave it there, but I think - like - a third of my wardrobe is from thrift stores.”

You listened, feeling oddly entranced by the way he was handing you thoughts as they came to him. There was something truly honest about it - a quality people back home didn’t seem to have. It was charming. 

He brought your glass of juice to you and then motioned to the rest of the apartment. “You want the grand tour of Casa De Joshua-” He gave you a pointed look and a cheesy grin. “And Y/N?” 

You breathed a laugh at him, nodding as you sipped. “Please.”

“Okay, try not to get lost - this is obviously the living room. I do most of my living here as the name would suggest. I found this couch on the side of the road - actually almost all of my furniture is adopted.” As he explained, he was gesturing to items like Vanna White.

The couch looked. Well-loved. You could tell just at a glance that it was probably past it’s prime when Josh had stumbled upon it, but it did look comfortable, and it wasn’t like you had a couch to offer, so you were happy with it. 

“I have this TV but it’s really only for movies and stuff because I’m twenty-two and I’d rather die than pay for cable. But there are literally hundreds of DVDs in the TV stand that you are welcome to peruse at your leisure,” he informed, his hands gesturing almost arbitrarily as he talked. 

You followed as he moved on through the archway. “This is the kitchen. All of the food lives here. There’s lots of stuff, but I try to just make two bigger meals per day. I don’t have a real ice tray so I’ve been using a chocolate mold- Well anyway, our ice will be in the shape of wiener dogs.”

You were shocked at the laugh that escaped you, genuine and uncontrolled. He grinned over at you, clearly also surprised - but pleased with himself for getting the reaction he was aiming for. 

“I think I can live with that.” 

“Good,” he agreed simply, giving you a new kind of smile - something sweeter. After a beat, he motioned down the hall with his eyes, letting you lead. “The bathroom is this way. The water takes like three or four minutes to get hot. I realized that I have a lot of products for some reason, but I condensed them all into this one area in the corner just in case my new roommate was a girl, and you are so that’s great. I’ll probably get a shelf.”

There was a proud quality to his voice like he felt gentlemanly for letting you have all the space you needed. For some reason, that made you feel warm and fuzzy. 

“And what if your new roommate had been a boy?” you inquired with a smirk. 

He put a finger on his chin, taking on a contemplative look for you. “Hmm. Then I guess I slowly would have moved my stuff back to the cabinet - probably just one thing per day so he wouldn’t notice. Unless he had a lot of makeup or something, then I’d just let him have it.” 

He grinned as you teasingly shook your head. 

“This way is the sleeping quarters. My room is there on the right and yours to the left.”

You stepped into your new room and let a sigh of relief. Two huge windows took up a lot of the far wall, framed underneath by large sills. The space was bright and roomier than you’d pictured. Your bed was set up in the very middle of the room, but you already knew exactly where you wanted it to go. For some reason, you had been concerned that you wouldn’t like the space, but it was kind of perfect. 

“This is great,” you breathed, turning to him and giving him a sly grin. “Wanna give me a hand moving my furniture around?”

He pretended to consider for a moment until you spoke again. 

“My mom sent money for pizza while I get stuff unpacked,” you said coyly. “If you needed any convincing.”

He laughed, showing you his teeth. “You drive a hard bargain. Okay, I’ll help as long as I get to look through your stuff while we move it.”

You gave him a questioning look, earning a one-shouldered shrug in return. He looked benign enough standing there, propped against the door frame with a goofy upturn to his lips, so you relented.  

“Deal,” you agreed.

You were positive you would not have been able to move stuff without his help. For being a slender boy, he seemed to easily be able to get things where they needed to be. He dutifully helped you shove your furniture into place - your bed against the window wall, your desk and vanity on the wall with your closet door. Then, bless his little heart, he helped you move it all again when you decided you didn’t like the arrangement (but not without some light griping). 

One by one, you brought in your boxes from the living room and you allowed him to poke through them, perched on your bed. He flipped through your books, thumbing pages of ones that piqued his interest - you could only imagine that he was already planning on borrowing some of them. He reacted similarly to your framed photos, as he unwrapped them from their packing paper.

When you got your record player set up, he put on a vinyl and started to hang your art prints on the wall where you instructed him to. The look of concentration on his face was rather endearing as he held a few nails between his teeth and hammered them into the wall, one by one. There was a time or two you were convinced that he was going to mutilate his thumb, but he didn’t, and when the last picture was hung, you breathed a sigh of relief. 

You called in a pizza, adorned with his requested toppings as you hung your clothes into your closet, your phone tucked against your ear and shoulder for maximum efficiency. 

Plants collected on your bed until there was no more room for them - after that, he started setting them on the floor as he brought them in from your car. He didn’t seem to be judging the sheer amount of them, even though he had every right to. 

“It’s going to look like a jungle in here,” he stated finally as he took a bite out of a slice of pizza that he was holding like a taco, his eyes raking over all of the foliage scattered around your room. Rather than sounding like he was teasing, his tone seemed excited. 

You grinned at him, starting to arrange them on the window sill and your bookshelf that had only ever served you as a plant shelf since you’d bought it. “Plants are my passion. Botany major,” you explained as you fluffed up your Monstera’s huge leaves. 

“Ooh.” He raised his eyebrows at you, pulling one of his legs up underneath him on your bed - now fitted with sheets. “I think that’s going to be nice. Give it some life in here.”

You grabbed another slice from the pizza box on your nightstand and tried to think of the right tone of voice to use to ask the next question. “How long have you lived here by yourself?”

He hummed, eyes flicking around distantly as he thought. “Well, I’ve lived here just over a year, and my first roommate dropped out and moved back home about...six months ago?”

“Have you been lonely? You seem like a social guy.” You gave him an empathetic look but he just shrugged at you. You hadn’t known him long enough to know for sure, but you suspected he was more affected than he was letting on. 

“I mean, a little lonely. But I got used to it for the most part.” He paused for a good couple of seconds before a smile spread across his lips. “And Penny’s kept me company.”

“Oh, does your girlfriend stay here too?” you prompted, trying to remember if you’d seen any feminine looking items lying around that weren’t yours.

“What? No,” he said under a chuckle and stood, gesturing for you to follow him across the hall. 

The second you walked through the doorway, you were met with the smell of incense sticks and linen. His room was dimmer than yours and kind of cramped with all of his mismatching furniture, but he had a huge bed - you thought it could easily fit three people in it. There were some clothes strewn about around a laundry hamper by the door and you tried to not be jealous that his closet seemed to be about twice the size of yours. 

He crossed the room to crouch in front of a coffee table that he seemed to be using as a catch-all. The varnish was worn off the top of it in rings because sitting on the coffee table was a globe of water and a calico colored goldfish swimming around aimlessly inside of it. 

“Ah, so this is Penny,” you giggled as you bent over next to him. When the fish spotted him, it rose to the surface of the water, opening its mouth in demand for food.

He grinned down at it. “Light of my life. We’re not allowed to have pets but I figured that a fish didn’t count.”

You hummed, admittedly a bit charmed by the whole situation. “But don’t goldfish require a lot of space?”

The smile fell from his face, adopting a level of concern you hadn’t yet seen from him as he peered over at you. “Do they?”

Immediately, you felt guilty for putting that look on his features. Your brain kick-started - trying to think of a way to make it right again. “I think so? Maybe we can find her a small tank? Put a few little plants in there for her?”

Josh nodded at you, stroking his fingers over the glass with a frown. “I’m a bad dad.”

“No, no!” you assured, putting your hand on his head but then removing it instantly when you realized that you didn’t really know him, he’d just already made you feel like you did. Either way, you figured it would be inappropriate to touch him. “You’re great. She looks really happy.”

“She’s great at begging for food, so don’t get tricked,” Josh instructed after a moment, seemingly able to put his concerns aside to jest you.

You nodded in agreement. “I’ll be ever vigilant,” you promised, making him smile again. 

He stood back up, so you did as well. 

“Well, I’ll give you some time to get comfortable in your room,” Josh said, sitting back on his bed. “Let me know if you need anything, okay?” 

“I promise I will,” you assured, tapping your hand on the doorframe on your way out. 

By the time the sun was set, your room was shockingly well put together. The emotional rollercoaster that was the album Rumors helped you keep on task, losing yourself in the music so it didn’t feel like work at all. You hadn’t been expecting it to come along so quickly, but you guessed that was because you hadn’t anticipated such a friendly roommate. The nesting had always been your favorite part, so you took your time to enjoy placing out all your knick-knacks and photos. 

You took a break to shower when you decided you were done for the day, reveling in the feeling of the water after such a long time in your car - He was absolutely right about how long it took to warm up from ice cold. When you got out and changed into your pajamas, Josh was sitting in the living room with a laptop across his legs. 

“You wanna chill?” he asked when he heard you padding down the hall, shutting the lid of it and setting it on a side table. “Or if you’re too tired, that’s okay too.”

“No, no. I’d love to talk.” You sat next to him, leaving a comfortable amount of room between you as you pulled your knees up to your chin. “Tell me more about yourself,” you requested, tugging a blanket from a beat-up wicker basket on the floor and wrapping it around your body.

“Hmm, okay,” he started. You wondered how long it had been since he had to introduce himself to someone new. “I’m from a tiny little town here in Michigan. I’m the oldest of four - two brothers and a sister. My brother, Jake, also attends MU and lives just off campus.”

You frowned at him. “Wait, why wouldn’t he live with you?” you asked through a disbelieving laugh. 

“He lived with me long enough,” Josh explained in a humored tone. “There are only so many people where I’m from and well - we wanted to meet new people, you know?” 

“I guess I should be grateful for that.” 

“Yeah, probably,” he teased and then paused to think. “I’m in performing arts - I’m actually putting on a production around Christmas with some elementary school kids.”

You suppressed the aww that was threatening to pass your lips. “You like kids?”

He beamed you a smile, shaking his head. “Love them. I want to have like ten of them someday.”

The thought of him surrounded by kids made you soften. You were genuinely shocked about how easy he was to talk to - how easy he was to like. You had never thought in a million years you’d get along with your roommate so well, let alone the first day meeting them. 

“I hope you get to,” you said as genuinely as you could muster, prompting him to give you a grateful smile. 

A yawn escaped you before you could hide it, and you quickly breathed an apology, but he just waved you off. 

“You must be exhausted from that drive,” he said, his voice soft. “You should get some sleep.”

You nodded in agreement and gave him a thankful smile. “Is it okay if I sleep out here?”

The look on his face was quizzical, forcing a laugh from you. “Why would you do that?” 

“I have this tradition where whenever I’m in a new place, I always sleep in the living room on the first night. It’s good luck.”   

“Whatever you say.” His lips pulled back into an unconvinced smirk. “Well, yeah, you live here now too, so you can sleep wherever you’d like.”

He disappeared into his room for only a moment before popping his head back out, fingers wrapped around the door frame.

 “Do you mind if I join you?” 

You tried not to look too taken aback by the question, but you could feel your cheeks flushing warm. You raked your eyes along the couch, entirely positive that there wasn’t enough space for the two of you to lay out on it together fully - at least, not without being pressed flush against one another. However, his face looked innocent and soft - not a single tint of mischief colored across his features.

“Yeah, that-. I guess that’s okay,” you agreed sheepishly with a shrug. “But I’m not sure we’ll both fit if I’m being honest.”

He frowned questioningly at you, his brows lacing together until he realized what you thought he meant. His face instantly turned a light shade of pink to match yours. “No, no,” he quickly assured in between a breathy laugh. “I’m not going to sleep with you - I’ll take the recliner.” 

“Oh, right.” You gave a nervous laugh of your own, cursing yourself out in your head for being so dull. 

You were still well embarrassed as you made a nest of blankets on the couch and he brought out a pillow for you when you realized yours were still tucked deep in your bag of bedding. When each of you was situated on your respective pieces of furniture, he flicked the light off with a comfortable sigh. 

It was silent for a moment before he spoke again, his voice taking on a tone that was far too smug for your liking. “You were awfully quick to agree to sleep next to me. You don’t have a crush on me, do you?” 

You knew he was teasing, but your heart rate still managed to pick up under the pressure. You had never been particularly good with awkward social situations; you rolled your eyes in the dark, thankful he couldn’t see how red you were. “No, Josh. I do not have a crush on you.”

“Okay,” he said through a melodic laugh, and you got the feeling that he’d gotten the reaction he was aiming for from you. “Should we be best friends though?”

You snorted a laugh of your own, wanting to be annoyed at how likable he was, but falling short. “You are the most peculiar person I’ve ever met, I think.” You curled up, clutching your blanket tight to your body. “But yes. We can be friends.”

“Okay, cool - I’ll order matching t-shirts for us.” You could hear the pleased grin he was wearing, making you feel warm and cozy. You pulled the worn blanket up to your chin.

“See to it that you do.” 

Author’s Note: okay, I hope you guys like it! please let me know if you want to be added to the tag list or removed from it. I’m using the same taglist from my Jake!fic, so no hard feelings if you don’t want to be tagged!

[koreaguides]

Is Food In Korea Expensive

In Korea, taxes are already included in the price of everything you purchase. There are no tips or delivery fees, regardless of where and how you acquire your meal. From street food vendors to major restaurants, the price of food in Korea is exactly what it says on the bill. If the price for your food id 10,000 won, a 10,000 won bill exactly will cover the whole cost. 

1. Street Food 

Some of the best and unique foods you’ll stumble across in Korea are from street vendors and they’re often sold at very reasonable prices. Look out for tteokbokki as it’s a common snack in Korea and can often be bought by the cup or 2-3,000 won. Egg bread and hotteok are also common finds ranging from 1,000 won. Fried fish cake, french fries encrusted corn dogs and even whole, fried squid often priced starting from 5-8,00 won.

2. Restaurants 

Food at local restaurants usually range from 500-10,000 won. With that you can get your favorite Koreans dishes from kimchi stew or tonkatsu. Side dishes are usually given for free, sometimes rice too if you ask for extra. As for fast food restaurants, places like Lotteria and McDonalds are priced starting from an average of 4,000 won for set meal and it can go up to 7,000 won. 

3. Cafes 

Cafes in Korea have a variety of delicacies to choose from. There’s coffee, tea, and desserts. Cafes in Korea do serve meals, mostly western food like pizza and pasta, but the people usually go there for desserts. Cakes are around 4,000-5,000 won per slice while drinks range from 3,000-6,000 won. 

4. Luxury Range 

Luxury, Michelin star restaurants in Korea range from Korean cuisine to various other cuisines like fusion dishes, western cuisine, and even Mediterranean. The starting price can range from 56,000 won up to 170,000 won.

[muichiroslover]

Pairings: Osamu x fem! reader x Kyoutani

Warnings: Angst

Angst with happy ending <3

_______________________________________________

The knocking on the door alerted me from the movie I was currently watching that there was someone at the door

I pause my movie, shamelessly being Tinker bell and the never beast and got up putting my bowl of pop corn down and dusting my hands off

I walk to the door and unlock it and open it without looking or asking who it was, I could fight off an intruder if it was one, the rain was pouring hard outside and it caught me off guard to see Osamu standing soaked on my door step

He looked up at me with a sad expression “she broke up with me” he says and I sigh as I open the door as inviting him in

I tell him to stay at the front and id get towels, while going up stairs to the bathroom that had extra towels i bite my lip, in honesty I liked Osamu for a while but when hearing he had gotten into a relationship with r/n I had to leave those feeling buried

And now here he is on my door step after their break up, honestly this whole movie night was to get my mind off it and not cry about it, but things never seem to go according to plan

Shaking my head to clear my thoughts and not act out I grab the towels quickly and head downstairs, after all i don’t want him to catch a cold

I get downstairs and see him still at the entrance looking down, I put a towel on his head and over his shoulders as I lead him into the house using one to wipe the floor after him

I put a towel down on the couch for him to sit and sigh as I sit next to him

“Do you perhaps want to take a shower?” I ask and he stays quiet as I sigh “you take a shower I’ll bring you clothes that belong to my brother, I’ll put them right outside the door” I say standing up and he does as well and heads to the bathroom since he’s been here before

Grabbing a simple t shirt and sweatpants I fold them nicely in front of the bathroom door and sit on the couch twisting my fingers as I wait for him to get out

I need to prepare myself emotionally, POV, your crush you’ve liked since years has just broken up with the girl he loved which was not you and is gonna go on about how much he loves her and wish he still had her and..

You put you hand up to your cheek in surprise as a tear and two slip out

Wiping them away quickly I lean back on my couch, my hair draping over it as I bring my hand up to my neck and rub it, it’s something I absentmindedly did when I was stressed out

Groaning and sitting up I finally hear the shower stop and I grab my phone to pretend I was on it the whole time, a few minutes later Osamu walks out and wow just wow, he even mad a simple casual outfit look so good

He sat down next to me on the couch and it was silent “talk to me Samu, you know I’m here to listen” I say sighing and soon theres sniffling then soft crying

“I love her so much Y/n..” he says, I was expecting that so why..why did it hurt so bad, I grab the back of his head and pull him into a hug as he sobs

“It’s okay Osamu, I understand what it feels like to love someone but not be able to have them anymore..” I say and he sobs as I bite my lip to keep in my own sorrowful weeps

As I hug him his phone goes off on the table near us, he lets go of me quickly and I wince because he pulled on my arm that I had sprain the other day during my last basketball tournament, a game he missed to hang out with r/n

He grabbed his phone and looked at it quickly, his eyes scanning while I curiously watched him, he jumped off the couch which startled me and now I wanted to know the news he had gotten so excited over

“Y/n! She texted me! She wants me back!! She-she wants me back she said she-“ he says smiling exasperated and looking at me

I look at him and tilt my head as I smile at him fakely “go get her tiger” I say and he smiles at me as he rushes to grab his stuff “it’s raining” I say to him from the couch and he chuckles “I would gladly run through rain for her over and over again”

And that was the last thing he said before leaving my house, I sat in silence as I slowly brought my knees up the couch, I sobbed, sobbed until I couldn’t anymore

He’s right, it isn’t fair

I lift my head up as the tears flow down my face, why did I have to fall in love with someone who clearly didn’t love me

Why did my heart do this me, why did it..hurt so bad

I clench my shirt as I let out strangled cries of emotional agony, while I’m crying the love of my life is running to his love

I laughed at the irony of it all and soon there was a knock once again at my door, has it come to bring me more pain?

I got up as I wiped my tears away in a rush, attempting to hide the evidence, but when I opened the door I was surprised

“Kyou..tani?” I say and he looks at me with his usual scowl, an umbrella over his head and 2 bags of McDonald’s

I step to the side and he comes in as he takes off his shoes and we walk to my living room, we sit down on the couch in silence

Soon a tear then two slip out and I start silently sobbing as Kyoutani sighs and opens his arms, I hug him as I sob into his shoulder

Since I cried so much not much was left to cry and when I did finish crying Kyoutani gave me a McFlurry, I smiled even though my eyes were red as I took it and took a spoon, the cold and sweetness putting me at an unusual ease

“Thanks Kyou..” I say and he hums as he eats a burger, after I finish my McFlurry I look at him and he looks at me then snorts

I scrunch up my nose “what?” I say and he sighs as he puts his drink down and leans towards me, my eyes widen as he used his thumb to wipe my mouth, then licks his finger

“You had ice cream on your mouth” he says casually sitting back down and I feel heat rush to my face

“O-oh thanks” I say and something pops up in my head that I was hesitant to ask

“Uh Kyou” I say and he hums in a way as saying, continue

“Would you...run through the rain for me?” I say not looking at him and I hear him make a sound of confusion

“No why would I do that” he says and my heart deflates

“Oh I-“

“When we could walk through the rain sharing an umbrella together” he finishes and I feel my face grow hot

“Oh..” I say subconsciously smiling a little bit and he smiled too, the girl he loved, blushing and smiling at his comments and actions, it was a good day for him

“Well let’s start this movie, the never beast again? Ugh your obsessed” he said and I laugh as I play it

And as me and Kyoutani laughed and talked about the movie I realized something

Maybe

Osamu and me weren’t meant to be for a reason...

I walked down the aisle as I looked up at my husband staring at me lovingly as I get passed to him and we stand hand in hand

Because

“Y/n do you take Kyoutani as your awfully wedded husband”

I was meant to be with someone else

“Yes, I do”

[amenomiko]

Thank you for the request @crossmix ❤❤❤

As for this, I will choose fluff instead 🌸! Tho it's more to hilarious side. Hope you like it!

❤🌸❤🌸❤🌸❤🌸❤🌸❤🌸❤🌸❤

"(눈‸눈)..."

"(ㆁᴗㆁ✿)..."

"ಠ_ಠ..."

The three of them has been standing for almost half an hour in that battlefield. Kenshin on the right, with his alliance, ninja, and vassals behind him, Mitsunari on the left, with his vassals, fellow warlords and lord, a.k.a Nobunaga, fuming Hideyoshi, amused Mitsuhide and Masamune, as well as a bored Ieyasu who mumbles "Can I at least, the only ONE, to return now?" under his breath for a while now.

And there's MC, standing in between of both of the two men.

Kenshin turned to her, "Be mine." Now. That was quick.

"No, Princess. Please be with me." Mitsunari chimes in.

"Uhm.. Wah-" Her hands were clasped in his gentle ones, "I will.. I will try to be better, if you choose me."

"Hm."

"Eh--"

Kenshin pulled her by the waist. "Your place is with me. I will make sure you will be the happiest."

"W-wait- geh-"

Mitsunari pulled her to his side. "Princess, I have told that I brew tea clumsily..! I will train myself, under Mitsuhide-sama's class, so I can always give you the best tea in Azuchi..!"

"Oh my (˵ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°˵)." - Mitsuhide

"SSSHHHH (☉д⊙)!" - Hideyoshi

"I- I'm sure making the best tea is not the issue here,, where actually- wargh!" MC were pulled towards Kenshin again. "Forget the tea. We have the best sake in Echigo. We even have a special sake that can help you to lose weight."

"Oh wow. That sounds nice--"

"Hmh."

"N-no :(´◦A◦｀):..! Princess..!"

"Wait- are you implying that I'M FAT??"

"What- no- what I mean is--"

"Phew (❁´◡`❁)🌸🌸🌸."

Meanwhile, Sasuke: Popcorns, popcorns, get your popcorns.

Yukimura: Sasuke what- pop- what?

Sasuke: It's a corn. That pops. So... It's... A popcorn (´・ｪ・｀).

Ieyasu: *Groans* Can I go now?

Sasuke: I have a flavor that you can sprinkle with wasabi powder, Ieyasu-sama.

Ieyasu: Good. Give it here.

Sasuke: *Low voice* While you are at it, could you give me an autograph on my glasses (´・ｪ・｀)✨✨✨?

-Back to the three of them-

"You are misunderstanding it, MC. I didn't mean to say that you are--"

"I what? I what?? Just admit that I'm not flawless and fat and-- *sniffs* there's no McDonald's here and yet this era's lord think that I'm faaaaattttt 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭!!!"

"Oh no, Princess..! There, there..! I don't know what 'mekdonalds' means, but you don't deserve such words..! You are perfect and beautiful the way you are (´・д・｀)!"

"Oh, Mitsunari..!" She kisses his cheek, "You are the sweetest angel ever..!"

"Hehehehe. Heh."

"...Was it me or our Mitsunari just smirk? Like an evil face. Like you?" - Masamune

"Yes, like me indeed. Hm ( ͡^ ͜ʖ ͡^)." - Mitsuhide

"Both of you be quiet (　☉д⊙)!" - Hideyoshi

Kenshin clicks his tongue to Mitsunari, hand shaking from gripping the hilt of his sword. "Now, now, Kenshin. It's not fair to use violence when you are fighting over a goddess- whoops- O3O!"

"Woah OAO-" Yukimura dodges the flying sword, as well as Shingen, and the soldiers behind him,

"EEEEEEKKKKK \(QAQ)/!! Kenshin-sama don't use us to throw your Himezuru just because you are angry!!"

It was MC's turn to click her tongue this time. "I don't know what's going on with both of you right now, but please stop with the hand and body pulling. I'm sure everyone is waiting to return home."

"Yes..!! You said it, Princess 😭😭😭😭😭!!!"

"No. You must choose first. It's with me, or with those lots."

"What do you mean, Kenshin-sama? I'm Azuchi castle's chatelaine!"

"Clearly. Now, Princess, let's go home. I will brew you a tea, that can help to make your skin flawless (✿❛◡❛)✨✨✨ (No bad intention whatsoever)."

"......Did you just say that my skin is rough?"

"Eh- n-no-"

"How. Dare. You. To betray me like that, Mitsunari (　☉д⊙)!"

"Eeehhh b-b-but Princess..! What I mean is QAQ--"

Kenshin: Hm. Hmhm. Hmhmhmhm 😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏.

-----

Sasuke: Goodness. Please don't laugh like that, Kenshin-sama, your bunnies is terrified until they hide behind me.