#the show is called somewhere south btw

[note-a-bear]

So wild. This white southern chef, Vivian Howard, had this show on PBS for a long while. And her whole thing was history of southern foodstuffs and foodways.

I was always struck by how minimized and sometimes outright absent Black Folks were from her chronicles.

She has a newer show, apparently, and every episode I catch she's featuring a Black chef, cook, or producer and highlighting Black culinary history. Which like, yknow what? Pretty impressive for a white southern chef.

Not many white chefs make a point of doing that, so to see this, even if it's a belated apology for the earlier erasure, is a great step.

[everythingwasnormalhere]

tbh i see the south park kids as having the weirdest (friend group) family tree just because sm of my friend groups have one and its fun ok

it all started with clyde jokingly going "my dads! 🥺" at craig and tweek

they were "o-o tf" but soon jimmy went like

"if they're the dads i wanna be the cool uncle"

token obviously tagged along

"if you're the cool uncle what would i be?"

"obviously the rich aunt"

they made a lot of family lore that day

part of it being that jimmy and timmy were the uncle and his friend who aren't together but have a weirdly vaguely homoerotic relationship (def not inspired by jimbo and ned)

since this clyde calls craig and tweek "dad" randomly

(mainly craig because he knows it annoys him so bad)

anyway cryde were hanging out at craig's one day and clyde did that

and tricia heard so she understandably asked tf was that about-

so clyde told her the whole family tree lore XD

tricia like ":o I WANNA BE LA TÍA CHISMOSA"

craig translates and clyde's all "omg slayy"

after this tricia eventually hangs out with TaTI and tells them about this whole thing

karen's excited XD she's the lesbian aunt :3

eventually tricia and karen adopt ike and firkle

they agree they're twins, and firkle proclaims himself as "the family's dissapointment" 😭

firkle convinces the other goths to join too

they're those guys who nobody's sure where in the family they are but they show up to every family gathering so everyone assumes they are somewhere

on the other side craig told kenny about the whole thing (because they talk about everything)

kenny decided he'd be craig's sibling + that one uncle who's in jail more often than not

then kenny to keep the family tree going pulls a clyde and straight-up asks kyle and stan

"hey guys wanna adopt me?"

they're so weirded out,, more taking into account they aren't even dating,,,

but kenny manages to convince them

cartman is decided by stan kenny and butters to be kyle's sibling

cartman and kyle are So against that

butters and kenny adopt dougie btw :3

at some point the girls find out about the tree too

the guys suspect it was clyde but tbh? who knows

there's lots of lore on their side too

stan was wendy's first marriage and they had red

but it was a shitty loveless marriage so wendy divorced him and married bebe

(just because they're the co-leaders of the cheer team ok)

in that marriage they had heidi and nichole :)

at some point it's clear everyone's somehow part of that dumb craig's gang supposedly internal joke 😭

since nobody agreed on anything though, it's a fucking mess,,,

clyde is the one in charge of drawing it to make things clear for everyone (because he's who started that madness)

so you just see all the kids in class all around clyde who's writing on a sheet of paper in the verge of a breakdown 😭

[karaonasi]

Our Life Baxter Story Masterlist

The stories are listed in chronological order

I am completely in love with Our Life: Beginning and Always. This isn’t some normal otome game. This is the most immersive, touching, inclusive story I have ever experienced. Please check it out by @gb-patch

My MC is Christopher “Kit” Kim Onasi. But everyone calls him “Kit”

He’s direct and usually joking in game—to the point of being irreverent at times.

Best friends with Cove growing up, more brothers than friends.

Kit always is made to feel “odd” growing up for having no interest in romantic or physical relationships, despite being a huge flirt. Eventually he comes to realize he is somewhere between grey-ace and demi—there basically being only one exception to his lack of interest.

Kit’s birth parents were South Korean, though he somehow inherited deep blue eyes that appear violet. He has black hair and when I looked for a face that matched the boy in my head, Kim Doyoung from NCT fit perfectly—down to the huge smiles that even show his gums. Kit is about 1/2 inch shorter than Cove in steps 3&4 (though he refuses to admit that.)

The main story is a WIP going through the game’s starting at Step 3 with alterations to fit the characters and situations. (There is an outline you can use to skip around in the story if desired.)

Here is Kit and Baxter’s story posted serially to Tumblr:

Or you can read the whole thing (so far) here:

Before Mountains:

Step 4:

Dating Post-Game Events:

Morning Mess:

(BTW there is a NSFW extension to that story. If you know me in the Patreon Discord Server, hit me up)

Aaaannnnd it won’t let me post more links. So I’ll have to think about how to get more on this list.

There are more stories

If you have questions for me regarding my understanding of the character of Baxter Ward, I would be happy to try to answer them.

Please be aware that I DO NOT tolerate hatred, bigotry, or willful ignorance.

[gojuo]

Gojo has his head. In season 2 he tells toji he failed to kill him because he didn't cut off his head. Sukuna didn't cut off his head. He can still heal his body.

Plus we see Nanami tell gojo that there are two paths. One to change you or one to stay who you are. Gojo says goodbye to his dead friends and we see him walk away showing he's taking the second path. We also see a lotus then.

Which symbols strength and renewal.

Gojo is not dying. He may be gone a few chapters but everything his hunting he will heal his body and be back.

Gojo will live.

i wish i had your hopium but i gotta correct a few things here ... 1) it was said by i think kashimo (i dont even remember) that cursed energy comes from the gut, and gojo has been split into two from his stomach. toji never bisected him, even if he managed to stab him through the cranium. 2) gojo didn't say goodbye to his friends in the afterlife, that was a mistranslation. 3) he's not walking away from anything either ?? 4) the chapter title is called "going south" bruh...

listen. i so badly want him to come back. i really fucking do. i read jjk 0 when it came out in jump giga in 2017 and when it wasn't called jjk yet (it was called tokyo metropolitan curse technical school btw). i've been with gojo since mfing 2017... 2017!!! i've loved him for over 6 years now i can't even believe it's been so long.. i never expected that silly oneshot manga to become this popular 🥹 kinda makes me happy how loved jjk is currently :')))) but the fact of the matter is that gege has stated numerous times that he wants to finish jjk soon. he actually stated in late 2022 that he was planning on finishing it in 2023. gege's editor has come out and said that the manga will not be ending this year though, so my guess is somewhere around spring 2024 everything will be wrapped and and be donezo so that gege can move on to that goddamn idol manga he's been yapping about for a while now. so what am i trying to say with this tangent? i'm saying that jjk is ending soon and that gege has stated multiple times how difficult it was for him to write around the powerhouse that is gojo (which is just an admission of his own shitty writing/planning because mf YOU 🫵 are the writer like you are the one that created him!!! learn how to plan out your story and how to utilize the characters you yourself have created for it you stupid fucking cat i swear to god....). this all just screams to me that it's over. it's finished. gojo already died once and came back enlightened, he's not gonna have it a second time. not this close to the end. not after having been removed from the narrative for over a hundred chapters. not after seeing sukuna back at full health in his heian era form, something gege didn't even have gojo force out of him. like gege really got him out of the box so that he could be done with him unarguably and conclude his character arc because he wants to finish jjk.

gojo is dead, nobara is for sure dead, megumi is basically done for (we'll see him once more within the mind once yuuji does his soul cursed technique whatever bullshit on sukuna to have a talk but he's not coming back no more), and yuuji, the kid whose execution started this story, will be the only one left alive. gege said in an interview a while ago that he wanted to end jjk with either 1 of the main 4 dead, or only 1 of the main 4 alive. i think it's pretty obvious that person is supposed to be yuuji. "die surrounded by your friends" from the first chapter is going to turn into "all your dead friends will surround you". i am wholeheartedly convinced of this. i'm sorry, but after 3 years of having to sit through that worthless culling game arc leading to absolutely nowhere for our heroes, after realizing that there will never be a pay off for the last 100+ chapters because the whole point of the arc is now fucking dead just like that, i do not have it in me to have any faith nor hope in gege's writing skills. it's become painfully clear to me how mid that guy is at writing and how hard he is rushing towards the end. i have lost all faith and goodwill i used to hold for gege.

[visarcana]

Kamakura pt. 3 - Hitomi's commute

I was doing some thinking/researching about where Hitomi lives, thanks to a question by @mirimiramiri. Aaand another portion of my useless ramblings came out of it... well, first of all, I still believe the place where Hitomi lives (Kanzaki family house) and the place where Hitomi's mom hosts Amano and Yukari (and shows them photos of Hitomi's grandma) could be two separate places. I already explained the theory in one of the previous posts.

I'm not exactly convinced but it can be also be argued, and Japanese wikipedia actually said at one point, that Hitomi lives in Fujisawa, which is the neighboring town of Kamakura. The wiki no longer says so btw. and I can't even find it in history so it's possible that edit was eventually marked as vandalism. One possible explanation of the Fujisawa thing is that when Hitomi goes back from school in ep 24, she wanders around town after dark (we see stairs and pedestrian crossing) but these stairs are actually near the station in Fujisawa, not Kamakura.

So that can make it look like only her school is in Kamakura and she goes home every day to Fujisawa (it's not far at all, actually, the green train that is featured in the anime goes only between Kamakura and Fujisawa as a short, local line). She's also alone, and now that I think of it, Yukari is not seen in the scenes with Hitomi waiting at the station in the anime. So it could mean they normally separate somewhere before that and Yukari may not even need to take the train to school like Hitomi does.

Meanwhile, going by the same logic of existing places again, the place where Hitomi's mom meets Hitomi's friends is certainly in Kamakura, because in that scene, we see another existing station that is in the town, the Kita-Kamakura station.

So yeah, if Hitomi actually lived in Fujisawa, this would furthermore support my two houses theory. But there's another catch: after we see Hitomi walking around Fujisawa after dark, we see her on the train (again? or for the first time that evening?), and the direction she's riding seems to be... back to Kamakura. I realize now that she would even pass the station she seems to be waiting at in ep 26, so if we went by the existing stations, it would seem a deliberate detour into the neighboring town, then back to Kamakura, where she lives (after all).

Still, there's something irrational for me there, but I feel when they set the atmosphere with stills before they show the Kanzaki house and the place where Amano and Yukari meet Hitomi's mom, it feels different. I get the impression the Kanzaki house is closer to the shore but the other place is definitely in the area near the station above, in more traditional part of the town and farther away from the sea. Of course, I could be entirely off and Hitomi in fact takes the train from the imaginary mix of Koukou Mae and Hase stations in the south of the city and exits at the station above, Kita-Kamakura or North Kamakura, which is also where mom meets her friends. BUT WAIT, the Kita-Kamakura station is no longer on the same line and she would actually have to transfer from the green train (Enoden) to the regular, Tokyo-bound train (like you see on the cap on the station), even if it's not such a long trip.

AND it wouldn't even make a lot of sense to do all that either, because Hitomi's school is canonically called Kamakura Kita, or Kamakura North. If she actually lived somewhere near the North Kamakura station, she would not walk all the way south to take a train from there, because the school already IS in the north of the town and should be walking distance from her home. Unless she goes south only to see Yukari off, it would be an illogical detour. But we see do her waiting on the station south on the shore, without Yukari. I think that confirms it's part of her regular commute. So yeah, TL; DR I'm sticking to the two houses theory and I actually will make further use of that later in the story.

Anyway, here's the whole recollection of Hitomi's way back from school, at least on the day she first faints on the track (which is one day before "the fateful" one), using what I know from visiting the place and listing the (real locations):

Hitomi and Yukari walk out of their school (Sasuke Inari Shrine)

The two pass the "hair salon" and the church (Kamakuraoncho Church)

The two go down the stairs (Gokurakujizaka Pass)

The two have their talk in the tunnel (Shiyakusho Doori/Ave.)

Hitomi, already alone, wanders around town (Fujisawa station)

Hitomi is on the train (somewhere between Fujisawa and Kamakura)

Hitomi reaches the Kanzaki residence.

In real Kamakura, this actually stops making sense already by the stairs, at least if we consider the scene order as chronologically linear. Because the tunnel is right after the church on the same street and the referenced stairs are in another place totally and don't even lead to anything relevant.

Not to mention, the station Hitomi is seen waiting at in other scenes is also elsewhere and it makes no sense to go to it by the road they're taking. So you cannot retrace a linear route, they are practically teleporting around the town map.

So, the conclusion is, you probably cannot reference Escaflowne's Kamakura to the real place, they just used the "sceneries" and connected them as they liked without much heed to the directional accuracy or logic. They just made their own, imaginary Kamakura, keeping the atmosphere and sights of the actual place, and using the whole Shonan region, not exclusively Kamakura, as a reference. I shouldn't even be surprised, as this is how they deal with real life inspirations all over the anime, why should this be an exception just because it's on Earth? It's intriguing but also great pain to come to any conclusions about this stuff, obscure and tangled as it is. Yet I greatly enjoy the process for some reason.

Anyway, we can at least sort of piece together the idea of Hitomi's route home from school from episodes 1, 24, and 26 (although it seems she may have even taken a little walk/detour in ep 24):

her school is in the suburbs, next to a Shinto shrine

she walks by foot to the town centre/station, together with Yukari, traversing the long, steep stairs and the tunnel

somewhere on the way or maybe in the town centre she separates from Yukari, who either lives walking distance from school or takes another train (possibly from another station?)

she waits alone at the train station in the wider town center

she takes the train home

Related posts:

The reply about Hitomi's house

Kamakura pt. 1

Kamakura pt. 2: Hitomi's home

Kamakura pt. 3: Hitomi's commute (this one)

The Surprising Discoveries

The First Visit

The Whole Pilgrimage

[indiejones]

'INDIA'S CENTURY-OLD RESERVATION & CASTE-DISCRIMINATION SCAM'-

Indian caste politics, began somewhere in early 1900s, ie ~100 yrs old.

(The most detailed statistical analysis from 1820's, documented in Prof Dharampal's legendary book 'The Beautiful Tree', based on British surveyor Adam's painstakingly researched Reports, shows how all states in India, except for female education (which btw has taken off everywhere in the world, not just in India, only in last 100 yrs) had a thriving schooling system with ~1/4th school-going kids of Bharat, & 1/3rd kids incl the vast sums receiving education at homes, being well schooled in all the important areas of learning of then. Further, a school generally present per 500 male students, with Brahmin kids accounting for on avg only 15%-20%, rest vast %s of school-going kids belonging to Shudra, Vaishya, Kshatriya, & Muslim communities!.. And twas only 1860's on, when Indian education came directly in hands of British, that they removed the rent-free nature of indigenous school, thus effectively killing basic free education in India, made all more advanced subjects a matter only for 'higher' (read monetarily expensive) education, & when asked what of the other lesser well off students, were told "such communities don't need such education", thus birthing the huge education caste divide, first in idea, & then in policy (by forcibly writing people's castes based on occupation in their surveys of early 1900's, & denying higher edu based on it), a policy that's carried on in India since then!

👇

https://archive.org/details/TheBeautifulTree-Dharampal/mode/2up?view=theater )

Now this caste-based politics birthed from the British's education caste divide, & nurtured in Independent India thereafter, is a direct lift from USA's 250 yr old 'Critical Race Theory' ie the TACTIC of reinforcing division in people based on LOWER & HIGHER BLOOD, as opposed to what it actually is-

A difference in ECONOMIC POSITION in society.

Most people who've seen India at reasonably close quarters, know how people from different so-called castes in Hindus, within the same area of upbringing, don't look diff or better enmasse,or don't talk diff or better enmasse,..but yes, they may wear & eat & live different enmasse.

What does this observation,which can be repeated as many times as wish,at different places,& over diff sample sizes, provided under the same criteria of selection, & give same results, tell you?

That CASTE IS FUNDAMENTALLY A SUBCONSCIOUS ECONOMIC CONSTRUCT.

And till Indian people, as society decide to not treat it as such, will keep getting played by politicians, who're always looking for 'easy block votes' anywhere in the world.

They will keep calling u 'shoshit vanchit samaj', knowing full well that they themselves are doing ur shoshan,by purposely not addressing the root cause for ur being 'vanchit', namely your opportunities for livelihood or occupation.

Do u know that this whole 'reservation' hoopla, accounts for only 8% of the total occupations opportunities in India?

Do you know that 80% occupation in India, is carried on in the primary sector, ie agriculture, manual construction, & animal husbandry, requiring no formal education as such!

Yet we've kept hearing about this ''shoshit vanchit samaj' before every election for past 75 yrs, from mouths of politicians, who know the facts I just mentioned before you & I did!

Do u know?

Korea before division into North & South, & China before Communist revolution, also had the very same varna-differentiation , based on their occupation- scholar,defender,farmer/trader,& laborer.

Yet both managed to not deviate it to, blood/capacity division Ie To people assumed to thence born only with a mind, or a hand, or a leg!

& Look where S.Korea, following the same unadulterated fundamentals, is, in just 75 yrs, the most prosperous nation on earth, while we, the originators & creators of these fundamentals, languish towards the bottom!

'CASTE-DISCRIMINATION' IN INDIA, IS 40% 'AN ECONOMIC CONSTRUCT', & 60% ITS BIGGEST ABETTOR, 'NOT POLITICAL CONSTRUCT BUT A POLITICIAN-CREATED CONSTRUCT'.

& EVERY POLITICAL PARTY IS IN ON IT!

COZ GIVES THEM EASY EMOTIONAL TRIGGERS TO CREATE MORE & MORE DEPENDENCY BLOCKS, & LESSER FOCUS ON KEY ECONOMIC INDICES OF PROGRESS.

& TILL POLITICAL PARTIES OFFICIALLY ANNOUNCE, TO ABANDON ALL CASTE & 'SHOCHIT' TALK,& ONLY FOCUS ON 'VANCHIT'..WILL CONTINUE TO BE OUR,YOUR & EVERYONE'S BIGGEST 'SHOSHAK'.

& WE THE PEOPLE, WILL KEEP STAYING 'RESERVED..FOR A ROYAL SCREW OVER'.

[whysojiminimnida]

Your Yoongi is SO cute! OMG. Anyway, wanted to ask you about the photoshopping away of the tattoos. I have seen that sometimes it's done in Japan and Singapore,or is it the Philippines? Is that new photo from Samsung? I have also seen when JK wears a flesh colored or sometimes black half glove or patches to hide them during live performances. Seems weird to this western woman.

Hi anon!

JeiKei's tats are fun partly because they're soooo ... bad boy in Korea. Literally. Like, it's still not legal to tattoo there unless you're a doctor.

Brad Pitt's Seoul-based artist, Doy, has been hit with fines for tattooing illegally, even though he is widely considered to be one of the best artists in the world. For hundreds of years, the Korean government used tattoos to mark criminals - and slaves - and it's only been recently (since about 2015, so not that long) that tattoos have been worn in public at all.

In fact, until late 2020/early 2021, people with multiple tattoos or tattoos in places like the hands/knuckles? Were deemed UNFIT FOR ACTIVE MILITARY SERVICE. They put you in the kitchen or a back office somewhere with the fat kids, too-skinny, sickly or mentally not well kids.

Both Samsung and FILA are Korean companies, despite the fact that FILA was originally founded in Italy. It is now a Korean-owned brand. And both of those companies are BTS sponsors. And both those companies photoshop JeiKei's tattoos into oblivion, sometimes to the detriment of his poor hand in pictures. But even BigHit itself has 'shopped out Koo's tats, as recently as the Bon Voyage 4 promos in November of 2019 - right after his hand tattoos showed up.

(top: Jungkook at the airport on the way to film BV4, November 2019. bottom: Koo on the plane in BTS Official content, the same day. Something appears missing.) So we can't throw the blame or credit for removing JeiKei's tats onto other countries - this is a Korean man working and living in Korea, where the tattoo is still very much taboo. Jimin's NEVERMIND tattoo caused enough furor that most people thought it was fake for YEARS.

And interestingly, Jimin was the first BTS member to have tattoos - not Jungkook. And he has, by some counts, seven or eight of them. I've only ever seen four. AND ETA disclaimer: this falls under the "I heard" is not a valid source rule so I ain't got a valid source. Your guess is as good as mine okay but if he has extras we have not seen please jesus let one be on his ass

And THIS DAMN KOREABOO ARTICLE IS THE BASIS FOR FLOATING THAT ENTIRE TATTOO LIE, BTW:

September 16, 2019, and some TAEHYUNG STAN TAEKOOKER called @ taecypher_ on stan twt made up and/or posted an "ANALYSIS" of Koo's hand tats. With zero sources to back it up. And KOREABOO FUCKING PUBLISHED IT. And that, children, is how bullshit becomes canon. No proof, no receipts, no interview questions, just "this is what some doorknob thinks because she's a TKK stan" and "sounds great let's float that bitch". SO I GUESS I'M OUT HERE WRITING DISSERTATIONS ON TATTOO CULTURE IN KOREA NOW I really need to get a handle on this adult onset ADHD I have going on. Anyway, hope that helps, anon!

[transsexualism-archive]

Natasha 5000? 👀🍿

ok storytime. sit down and grab your beverage of choice this is going to be a long one

i met natasha 5000 when we were both in 10th grade (we were in the same mutuals polycule online and it turned out we live rly close to each other, i think i was in the age of sail fandom at the time) and we were just. awful kids with severe anger issues so we have always been pretty aggressive to each other but not like in an abusive way. we used to spend literally every day together, usually at my apartment, smoking cigarettes and watching kpop videos (she forced me memorise all of the bts boys like literally wouldn't stop showing them to me until i could tell all of them apart) and just generally fucking around. she used to buy us cigarettes bc she looked older and the cashiers rarely asked her id

so yeah we spent some of our most formative years together (from 15 to like 20? 21?) and we fought a lot so we would go months without speaking to each other after a bad argument but inevitably always came back to each other. i think we've grown as people a lot and this in fact taught both of us how to be less toxic. i remember at least two conversations we had about how much we changed for the better

i think it's very rare to have a person in your life who just Knows you inside and out and you in some way share a life together. but i also think you can never fully know someone entirely. ive had people in my life who turned out to be completely different from me years after we became close

ANYWAYS im too tempted to dunk on natasha but honestly just like me she was just a very unstable person and was a maximalist in a way most young people are

fast forward to 2018 (i think?). we've been fighting again, for quite a long time, but still close friends and on speaking terms. somewhere around may natasha went on a trip to south korea, and because she's a bitch idiot she ran out of money because she spent all of it on clothes and clubbing. i sent her ₱5000 - i didn't have a job at the time so the five thousand were carefully saved up by me over like a year. she didn't give the money back to me immediately after she came back, but i wasn't really bothered by that because she was my best friend and obviously she would give it back

then we started fighting again - i genuinely can't remember what about, but awful things were said, it was very ugly and im not at all proud of how i acted. at some point she blocked me on almost everything - phone number, twitter, tumblr, insta, you fucking name it. i called her out (via vk) about the money, but she said she's not gonna give it back bc i have her curling iron (not true, she lost it when she moved apartments) and one of her shirts

i truly don't know what was going through my head because instead of pushing it i was like "fuck you, im gonna steal your shirt" and then she blocked me on vk too and i had no means of contacting her

i could have called her from a different number or straight up come to her house (it's literally a 20 min walk from me) but at first i was too mad and then my pride got the better of me but im still very salty about the money . . . 5k is kind of a lot for me even still and i was saving them up for so long!!!!! i get riled up about this every couple months which i think is really funny because it literally doesn't matter. like im more mad about the money than the friendship i lost or how toxic she's been towards me

so yeah she's natasha 5000 because her name is natasha and she owes me 5000 rubles

(btw i stalked her socials a few years ago and she got diagnosed with bipolar just like me lol which explains a lot actually

[callsignbaphomet]

My aunt drove me to the appointment and I was hesitant at first because she is...a stress factor in my life. I know for sure she doesn't mean to be and I'm sure she doesn't even realize she's doing it but it ain't easy talking to her. I feel like my entire family is prone to playing the victim.

Example. A few years ago my aunt planned out a vacation for all of us to go on. The majority of us didn't want to go. It started disastrously bad when my idiot brother wanted to take the long way which here in PR it means going through the middle of the island which meant taking roads that were curves over curves over curves. I get car/motion sickness. I said this aloud. My aunt and my mom have witnessed this first hand. Solution? I gotta drive to avoid throwing up. I didn't want to drive because I didn't know the directions, even then we got super lost, and I was on some medication that forced my p****d out and I didn't wanna go on this vacation but was forced to go (this is me as an adult btw 😐).

So what happened? We had to pull over so I could throw up on the side of the road. I was beyond pissed. The rest of the week went from bad to worse. My sister and her husband insisted that all they wanted to do was go to the beach. I don't like going to the beach, I don't like swimming, I don't like pools, I don't like getting wet. First time at the beach I was on the shore overheating and heavily bleeding and I looked miserable but yeah I'm soooo glad that bitch and her bitch husband had soooo much fun.

Following day they (sister and her husband) wanted to go to another beach. My mom spoke up and said I wouldn't be able to go into the water and didn't think it was fun to just sit at the shore all day. Someone finally remembered me 🙄

So C, who had had enough of the trip since the start had been super quiet and I got a little angry at him for not speaking up either. Turns out he was on the phone searching for interesting things to do in the area aside from going to the fucking beach. So he asked my aunt if he and I could borrow her car. She said okay and during the entire stay all they did was follow my idiot sister from one beach to another, that's ALL they did. Beach hopping.

Meanwhile C and I went to see some weird salt flats, we saw a fuck old lighthouse and befriended some cats, we went to a really old church with an amazingly beautiful garden full of flowers. On the third day we went out to a park and had ice cream. Loooots of ice cream. So all in all C managed to make that disaster better. When he and I got back to the apartment my sister was putting on a show about how C and I didn't wanna spend time with the family.

Dude, I went from 0 to 1 trillion in 1 second and I swear I was gonna lunge at her but C grabbed me basically by the scruff of the neck and held me back and quietly said, "If that's what you think that's a you problem." and we went to take a shower. Which btw only had two temperatures: third degree burn and lava coming out of Satan's butthole. You can imagine how great that felt in the middle of summer in the south side of PR.

Fourth day was an all out disaster cuz my idiot brother, who btw, first day there kicked me and C out cuz he wanted our room cuz it was the only one with ac and he needed it because his crack whore ass was detoxing from some meds. Was yelling and screaming about going to kill himself (read: he wanted something and no one was indulging him so he used the excuse to kill himself to manipulate my mom and aunt to get him what he wanted).

That day was a mess of people pointing fingers and mostly my sister shoving blame everywhere and basically calling out my aunt for making us all go on this vacation when no one else wanted to go.

Drive back was awkward as fuck all with my aunt crying and feeling bad and me and C on damage control. She was super mad that all they did was go to the beach and asked me and C about all we did so we did and tried to make her feel better because my sister told her she has a lot of flaws she needs to work on and now she all boo hoo. Sure, my sister coulda worded it better but I'm glad it happened.

My aunt is one of those "my way or the highway" type of people. She gets set on one thing and noooooothing will change her mind. She constantly hounds me about doing something "productive" with my art. I often just shrug and ignore her but this is constant. I don't sketch in front of her anymore because it's every single time. She also doesn't take social clues, she outright ignores them on purpose. If a subject makes someone uncomfortable she'll keep prying because in her eyes you're probably not working hard enough or doing your best.

On the way to the doctor she brought up art again. I outright told her I wasn't going to do it. I wanted to say not everything has to be about making money but I held on to that one. I told her it was hard to establish a network, that I would be competing with thousands and thousands of people and that it was hard.

All she got outta that was that everything is hard and I'd have to work hard to get out there and establish myself.

Bruh...I was stunned.

So I outright told her no. I don't want to. My art is for peace of mind and she dropped it but I just know she'll bring it up again.

Look. As a hobbyist my art is okay but me charging people for that??? Who the fuck would??? Pay for that???? Jfc.

So we moved on to yet another uncomfortable subject and she said I may have ptsd. Dude...no offense but ya ain't a doctor (thank fuck). So she told me I should check to see a psychologist because then I'd have the tools to handle things better. Fair. I have been thinking about that to see if maybe I can finally get an answer to several things or if maybe I'm making all this dumb shit up in my head. But that was about all the logical shit she said.

She even thinks people are actually not working because they wanna live off unemployment and don't wanna work.

My face went blank. I tried explaining to her that people are protesting unsafe work environments, slave labor/wages, shitty bosses and she heard all of that (granted maybe I could explained it better) and all she said was, "You gotta start somewhere and from there go up".

Then it struck me that of course she'd never understand. This woman NEVER had to work during her entire years of college or even her master's. She has NEVER worked a minimum wage job ever in her entire life. I wanna find articles on what is going on with that and send them to her. She's all of what I said and more but she can sooooometimes see reason. To be honest I'm angry and disappointed in her. She always seemed to adhere to more open minded concepts in terms of society, how differences in generations was good for all of us in general, who's taken to learning what she can about mental illnesses and trauma and so on. She still has much to learn about those last two, she still can't comprehand how me making phone calls scares the fuck outta me, but it's a start? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Idk I just needed to let all of that out. I love her, she's done a lot for me but she's also been a source of stress for me and I can't openly talk to her about anything because she's not easy to talk to. Sorry for the length.

[shesawriter39049]

|GOD SAVE THE QUEEN|M|JH|

(Does he not look like he should be scaleing a damn window?!)

SMUT/ ANGST

Pairing: Hitman Hoseok & Mob Boss OC

Genre: Mob/Mafia/Organized Crime/Drug cartels/Established/unofficial but lowkey official couple...

WC-10K (A good 3-4 of it is smut btw) 

___________________________________________________________

 “I’m going to fall a fucking part, and so will my families empire and then what!? WHO the fuck are they going to blame then!? Huh? Definitely not my damn brother, he’s too coked out to even tie his fuckign shoe laces neverthless run the family business!”

________________________________________________________________

Note- This is old...I have a TON of mob/mafia-related “Pilot” chapters as I call them..stashed in my google Docs! This is a heaverier/ agngisterst read by the way, not a downer but just heavy ya know? It works just fine as a stand alone, but by the end of it you can tell that when I initially wrote it I was setting it up to be a series! One that would eventually involve the other boys as well, so there is some backstory!

________________________________________________________________

Hoseok;s tatted, and just radiates soft dom energy…and tbh that’s all we need in this world

The OC is stressed, and needs a damn hug...the end!

Warnings: (Nonsexual- Strong language, mentions of guns, drugs/drug use and addictions, violence and mentions of chronic illness..not pertaining to Hoseok though)  

Warnings- Soft Dom Hoseok, breathe play, slight pain kink(very minimal prep before sex...by choice) overstimulation, handjobs, light come play, spit play, chill dirty talk....unprotected sex.Semi public sex-ish(in her office while the guards are outside the door...)

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Hibiscus island, Miami Florida 8PM 

‘Alright, so I’m looking at about, a half kilo of snow, hmmm, maybe a little over a quart of skag and a couple hundred Tabs of Molly…”

The line went dead on the receiving end causing the man in question to attempt the phrase again…maybe his connection was bad?

“Helll-lo? Boss I said I-”

“I heard you. Was there a an actual question in there somewhere or where you just letting me know your eyes still work?” The level of just…. dry...that fell from his tongue just now….

“Well I-umm no.No...I just wasn't told exactly what was being retrieved from the plane so I just wanted to make sure this was accurate and noth-”  The scoff that rung through the other end was borderline humiliating, as if to imply there's no way in hell he could even think this was “accurate”.

“No Mark, it’s far from accurate, but what you see in front of you is what’s there…”

Ahhh, so that explains his happy go lucky sunshine personality at the moment.

“Okay, well I’ll have this sorted and get the plane sterilized, am I sending this down to the west wing for a quality check first or is this just being disbursed to the runners?”

A deep agitated goan rattled in his throat, god whyyyy does everybody have so many questions today!?

“Just-just put it in one of the storage units for now, I’ll deal with it later” Hanging up the call before any more questions could be rendered because he honestly didn't have the patience to even pretend like he cared right now! The minute the call dropped his phone buzzed indicating he’d receive about his 8th text in a row from a person he’s a second away from releasing a full barrel face on! 

It took every ounce of self control not to just let the phone slip out of his hand and shatter against the patternized stone walkway swirling beneath his feet!

Clearly,Hoseok’s not in a good mood, like, at all...there’s just so much floating through his mind right now he’s practically running out of space to even breathe! 

He’s tired, Irritable, that earth-shattering smile of his is nowhere to be found, instead it appears to have been replaced by a semi-permanent snarl. Oh, and the best part, Germany, yeah that was a complete and utter shit show. It was supposed to just be a simple negotiation in regards to you guys expanding to a new territory. Yet he feels like the last thing he did was actually talk, I mean fuck palms still feel as though they’ve been damn near rubbed raw at this point.  Hours, that’s how long it took to rid his otherwise delicately stealth hands of their custom crimson overlay! And to make life even better, he’s the one who has the pleasure of sitting down and debriefing the whole failed mission to you! 

So yay, he loves that for himself...truly…

 Everything just feels heavy, his head, heart hell, even his spirit at his point! Feet dragging through the opulent Medetriann style courtyard as if they weigh more than he did. The only thing that somewhat has Hoseok in a decent mood was you, the fact that he’d be able to see you in person after what felt like 6 years, which in all actuality was a little shy of 5 days! 

Easing his way through oversized dual french doors, into an area that essentially acted as the east wing's  “Lobby” if you will, panes of white walls, and thick black arched windows framed the entryway. The dim lighting hanging from the cast iron chandelier gave the effect that the stark white walls were almost glowing against the moonlight peeking in. My point? The atmosphere appears calm at first glance, warm..inviting...everything Hoseok needs it to be right now because again he’s NOT in the mood for bullshit. All he’s dealt with over the past 120 some odd hours was bullshit! Hint’s why your European connect is a good, meh, four soldiers down at the moment!

I can’t say Hoseok had a specific…”Greeting” in mind upon strolling back into the compound tonight…..

However, what I can guarantee is the soundtrack that is you going full hulk mode in your office, while your guards stood outside looking like bats outta hell, definitely wasn’t high on his list! The men stationed at the security desk were already whipping their heads around before he even pulled the door open. Ah the beauty of cameras, at this point they weren’t sure what was worse. You, playing whack a mole behind the wall or Hoseok’s reaction once he put two and two together! 

It takes all of 3 steps before another piece of something glass and undeniably expensive shatters against the wall. Accompanied by a loud grunt on your behalf, voice breathy and fragile, which lets him know you’ve been at this for a while. 

The level of just, exhaustion he could hear heaving from your throat is what had him more alarmed than anything else. The fact that you clearly didn’t have the self-control to tell your body to stop…which isn't like you at all! I mean fuck, how long have you been in there?! Hoseok’s heart was beating so loud he could hear it pulsing through his ears! 

“What the fuck did you guys do?!” The first and only thing to leave his lips as he huffs towards the control desk. The guard initially stationed in front of the camera’s, rolled his seat to the far left within seconds. Allowing his superior the space to do whatever he needs, they heard Hoseok’s mouse make about 1 good click before…

“Fuckkkkk” Cursed from his lips with enough depth to bounce off every surface in the room. There was an additional gruffness laced within his tone due to lack of sleep.. which almost made the sound more initiating, borderline animalistic. Hoseok’s voice actually broke towards the end, the growl dying on his tongue before it even started. Head bowing towards the monitor as he rocked forward, attempting to re-center himself. Keyword there….”Attempting”

Precipitously, there’s another sound rattling the air and no, it’s not another object flying against the wall ,it’s Hoseok’s fist...right into the marble desktop! Yup, there are no cameras in your office...why? Because you and the man in question have no fucking self-control...which suddenly he’s really, really regretting! Well, actually, there are cameras, however they can only be turned on from inside the office,and he already knew you turned the feed off! That’s why he’s on 10 because he can’t see you..at all! You could be hurting yourself in the process and he’d have no idea! The entrance to your office is camouflage for obvious reasons, to naked eye one wouldn't even know there was an office!

Even as your consigliere Hoseok didn’t ask for much, never has, not a big fan of relying on others to handle his needs...hmm wonder why he got to that point. Still, an unspoken rule of thumb when he leaves..is it’s every mother fucker's job within the compound, hell even the damn birds that frequent the garden! Everyone, needs to do their part to make sure he dosen’t come back to this..especially with the way things have shifted internally as of late! 

And by “This” I mean you having a mental breakdown in your office, because you aren’t one to just break shit for shits and giggles! This isn’t how you deal with a transaction going south, or a distributor sending over a bad strand of coke.. something’s wrong..really fucking wrong! 

Silent, dead silent, that's what Hoseok was, and that was utterly terrifying, your men knew to give him his space, that he’d address them when he’s ready. All the while carefully observing the way his fingers twitched anxiously next to one of the soldier’s guns, before wrapping his hand around the trigger. Teeth grinding together hard enough to crack a molar, repeating his initial question…

 “What. The. Fuck. Did you guys do?” Gritted through clenched teeth as he paced the gun between the three men standing in the lobby. Not even remotely concerned that he was outnumbered because they all looked petrified...as they should….clearly patience was the very last thing he had tonight. 

“Ugh, nothing we-” Click….there goes the sound of the safety, all of three words and a staggered pause in….

Hoseok’s stance never faltered, eyes blazing into the youngers with such intensity it took everything in him not to divert his gaze away from his superior. Head cocked to the side, jaw clenched painfully tight, you can actually visibly see it twitch. The slight arch in his brow let the guard know that was the wrong damn answer and this wasn’t multiple choice, it’s fill in the blank! So he’s got about one more try before this gun goes off, and suddenly you lot will have yourselves a red accent wall! 

“Hoseok, I swear we really-” Coyly swaying from behind the desk, edging his way closer and closer, to the dumbass that still hasn’t figured out how to properly answer the question. Connecting the gun to the side of his head, shoving the lackey against the wall in the process, there was an oddly calming aura radiating off his body right now. Which was clearly in strong contrast to what was currently taking place...and that’s because this..isn’t new to him anymore. The act of taking one’s life doesn’t weigh on his heart the way it used to and maybe that makes him a monster or..maybe it makes him damn good at his job. 

This was simple honestly, if they're not the reason for said breakdown then tell him what is. Not excuses as to why it wasn’t them because clearly that won’t get him any damn where now will it?

“Fuck-...she-she went and saw her dad!” Bingo! He all about choked on that…

 “ ...and she’s been like that ever since...I swear! I swear!” Hands above either side of his head,  shaking like a leaf in the wind, Hosoek could practically see his Adam’s apple bobbing against this throat, as he backed away. 

The shift within the air was palpable, they could’ve gotten whiplash from how quickly his eyes inverted, from pure rage to pain and concern. Shoulders slouched in on themselves as he released a shaky breath from his lungs, staggering backward as he ruffled his fingers through his jet black locks. Almost appearing somewhat winded by the update that he already kinda braced himself for honestly. 

“Fuck”  The word hushed from his lips so faint he doubts any of the men even heard him. Eyes fluttering shut briefly, his opposite hand rested on the bridge of his nose. Squeezing unnecessarily, tight, intentionally re-inflicting the pain he felt maneuvering through his chest!  It wasn’t even a full 30 seconds before he heard something else shatter into pieces, instantly snapping him back to reality, forcing him to reroute his thoughts. 

“How long…” There was a sudden dryness laced within his delivery as if he really didn’t want to know the answer.

“About a hour...or so….” 

“And I’m assuming she insisted on going alone?” No even bothering to make eye contact as a hushed “Yes..” fell from the guards lips. A low hum rang in the back of his throat while his eyes outlined the patterns within the marble, silently trying to pull his shit together before he made his next request….

“Override the security, and buzz me in….” The guards couldn’t help but feel a little shell shocked at how, monotoned, and emotionless his delivery was. One minute they could feel every once of his frustration without Hoseok even opening his mouth! Suddenly, it was like he’d completely removed himself from the entire conversation. Initially, his lack of patience steamed from other bullshit but now, none of that mattered, Germany, the drug deal, none of that even scratched the surface, all that matters right now is you. 

“Boss I don’t thin-”

Gaze slowly rising from the desk, cold, and somewhat feral, not quite sure why he’s being questioned, but right now, but it's definitely not the time! Bringing his nine back level with the guard in question, Hoseok didn’t have to say anything, his middle finger caressing the trigger said it all, expression blank. Gaze daring him to do anything but, buzz his superior in as he asked..nothing more, nothing less. 

Within seconds the center wall which at first glance just looked like a block of white Statuario marble started to shift, exposing all the shattered pieces of decor on the ground. Not even attempting to warn you first because he knew you’d tell him to leave. So instead, he took a deep breath, dropped the gun back onto the desk, cracked his neck a couple times, braced himself, and stepped inside. 

_________________________________________________________

Ya know, if circumstances were different the site in front of him could actually be somewhat comical. You, standing in the middle of this obnoxiously large gilded office, all dolled up in your heels, tight little LBD, dawning every curve on your body. A wrist full of Cartier and Bvlgari,hair curled...looking like you’re ready for a night on the town. Yet, instead of sitting in the middle of some 5-star restaurant drinking aged Scotch your in here. Angry, winded and breaking shit...really expensive shit at that! 

However, there was nothing even remotely humorous in regards to the reason behind your sudden rage. Honestly, it broke his heart to see you like this! Yes, the heart that most barely believed he truly had, but that’s neither here nor there, the people that matter know it threw and threw. Hoseok could feel the anger radiating off your skin even from where he stood. You were ablaze, nothing but utter rage, doused from your pores, but what made it even worse was the blatant desperation underneath it all. 

Every scream just seemed more and more broken...sure maybe he’s a hypocrite, he breaks shit all the time when he’s angry, hell people and objects included.  But you....this wasn’t you..and this wasn’t a healthy way for you to cope! To be real the only reason he stood there so long was because he needed a second to pull his shit together! The longer he stared at you the more his chest tightened, eyes burned like hell. His fingers twitched at his side trying to resist the urge to just come grab you, but he knew better. 

Sure, in most people's eyes, and by most I mean 99.9% of the population, you’d be the farthest thing from an angel! You lost any ounce of purity yearsss ago, still, in his eyes..there’s no one more untainted then you where it counts! And that’s, all that mattered because he knows better than anyone that you have a heart made of 24kt gold. A heart that needed to be protected at all cost, and clearly at the moment that’s not happening, because he can see it! Shattering all over the place along with very pricy china! 

Chest rising and falling painfully hard against itself, you were damn near blacked out in rage. So much so you didn’t even notice your office doors opening or closing. You, the woman that trained her ear to hear the faint hum of an elevator in an upscale hotel. 

Leaning down until your face was flush with the desk, gripping the edges so hard Hoseok could hear the floor creak. He couldn’t help but notice how flushed your knuckles looked, bouquets of bruises already blooming along the smooth surface. The moment of silence only lingered about….half a second, just long enough for you to recharge and grab something else to hurl at the wall. Voice-breaking before the hiss even fully rolled off your tongue, and that  “Something” was a set of Tiffany’s champagne glasses that you utterly adored! Well aware that wouldn’t go over well once this was all said and done so he figured that was his cue. 

“Y/n…” His voice wasn’t loud enough, abrasive enough, and frankly, you were far too absorbed to even hear him on such a neutering level! Sooo, he tried again. Slipping seamlessly into his…”Boss man”  tenor if you will, adding a dash of base to his voice that you could not only hear..but feel! 

”Baby!”

You startled upon hearing the endearment, head snapping around, body staggering until you fell back onto the corner of the desk. Bracing yourself with one arm, so you didn’t actually fall, chest heaving in short staggered breaths, as you gazed back at him, though it was clear initially you really weren’t looking at him.  

“Don’t!” He could see your body starting to curl in on itself as you shifted under his gaze which currently felt like an uncapped bulb in the middle of an integration room. The warning was too half hearted for him to even acknowledge!!

“Fuckkk''  Cursed from your lips only loud enough for you to hear once you gazed up at the clock through swollen eyes, not even realizing how late it was. Far too consumed in anger to remember that Hosoek was even coming home tonight, infuriating yourself even more because this was the last thing you wanted him to walk in on.  You didn’t want to burden him with the task of having to put you back together again, you’d been doing it just fine yourself for the past 5 or so days since this has secretly become routine as of late! You cry, you break shit, you touch up your makeup, and then you walk out of your office like nothing happened and continue running this 9 figure empire.

 “Just-go-go, back outside….” You were trying to sound strong, determined like you weren’t falling apart, and you were failing...miserably failing, you weren’t in control you were practically begging. The concern in Hoseok’s eyes was more than evident and that made shit even worse. Yet no matter how bad his palms were aching to touch you, he didn’t dare to reach for you yet, he knew your limits, and right now still wasn’t it…He could physically see you shudder as if it  wasn’t a solid 75 degrees outside right now.

The silence was too much, way too much, it felt as though it was ripping you apart, or maybe you were ripping yourself apart? Maybe it’s just harder to hide from yourself when you no longer can drown out your thoughts with the sound of you screaming and breaking shit…

“Fuck, this is about Germany right? Or Amsterdam? Whatever it is, whatever you need from me. You can have it...we can talk I promise, but right now,  I need you to leave…” Trying your damnedest to hold is gaze but it felt impossible because you knew he saw straight through you!

The pause was long enough for him to say something and still...nothing...it was like he was trying to push you enough to finally admit what you really needed from him.

“I just need a minute...t-to pull my shit together and then I’ll be fine, then we can talk.” You were practically whispering, your voice was so trashed and distressed. Forcing yourself to drop an octave, removing any texture from your tone  in order to properly “convey” your message yet he still didn't budge! 

“Hoseok, don’t make me ask again...just-” Shoeing your hand towards the door to replace the word you couldn’t quite get to roll off your tongue. 

Everything about you was contradictory because now you wanted him, your eyes were pleading in agony for him to hold you and make everything disappear. Yet, your tone was dry, removed, as if he was some low-level soldier on the totem pole, not to mention you legit just told him to leave. But oh how your emotions betray you when it comes to Mr. Jung! No matter how much bullshit you just spit out, you really only said one thing...and he heard it clear as day. 

Hoseok already knows, he knows you like the inside of a VP9 Veterinary pistol, no matter how cold your delivery was it didn’t stop him from easing off the wall and invading your space. You could feel him before he even got in within 10 ft of you, his aura already starting to infiltrate your little bubble! His stride was slow, confident, making up for all the things you currently lacked because that’s what a good partner does! 

He could see how hard you were clinging to the table as if you were using that to ground you, afraid of how lost you’d get once he got in arm’s length. This man had a soul that outweighed yours by miles and that was one of your favorite things about him, how deep he could go in more ways than one.  Hoseok didn’t stop until he was standing directly in front of you, close enough for you to taste the speirment on his tongue. Still, he hasn’t touched you and now you really needed him to touch you! The sweet musky scent of his cologne filling your lungs, you could practically feel the heat radiating off his body, god why weren’t the two of you in bed right now? Not even having sex nesicarilly,  just naked, skin on skin...you just wanted to feel him. It’s actually disgusting, the amount of control he has over your entire sense of being at this point. The way even just the slightest touch can completely throw all of your senses out of whack or back in whack I guess I should say.  

“Hmmm, a minute is all you need yeah….” Not even attempting to phrase it as a question because he knew it was all bullshit anyway!  So you didn’t dare respond, not trusting your voice anyway, just keeping your eyes trained on his...getting lost in how bright they looked in contrast to yours. Spreading your legs on instinct so he could get even closer, shifting slightly on top of the desk. 

Hands braced on either side of your frame to give him leverage as he tilted forward. “Well, it seems as though you’ve had….many minutes, hours even..” Eyes wandering around the room observing the mess you’d made, yeah the maids gonna need a bonus after this!  

“It doesn’t appear you having time alone has done you much good so try again baby…”Hoseok had a tenor that was meant for your ears, and your ears only. The typical bright almost giddy little accent to his tone was always replaced by a calmer, warmer one. An underlying element of sensuality that exuded just the right amount of calculated…. control….an effortless sense of dominance if you will.

Staring down at you through hooded lids thoroughly, reading for any ounce of discomfort! Once he didn’t find any... finally, you felt his hands take a firm grip on your waist. Your body tensed initially, hoping to counteract how hard you were still shaking! Hint, you failed, you were practically vibrating against him at initial contact!

“Breathe y/n...” 

“I am, trust me that’s the only thing I can do right now…” There was still a slight bite rolling off your tongue, no matter how winded you sound. However, in Hoseok’s eyes sass is better than silence so carry on! 

Nosing along the side of your neck, right beneath your ear, next to your windpipe, letting him feel how you truly felt, which was unbalanced and a little lost. Your heart rate per 15 seconds was probably double what it was on an average day and yes, Hoseok knows how many times your heart beats per minute on an average day! 

“Baby...” Cooed from his lips almost sympathetically as he slowly started painting a trail down the side of your neck with his lips. 

“Hoseok, I-god-I can’t-” You “can’t “what exactly?  Relax? Give in? Shut your brain off? What “Can't” you do? 

“Yeah, yeah, you can, let me turn shut your brain off for a minute , let me take care of you.” Hands gently ravishing your body, effortlessly sending goosebumps down your spine with every feather-like touch. 

“I’ll give you any, and everything you want, but I won’t leave you alone right now…” The words fanned against your skin making your shiver against him, no matter how calm his tenor was the dominance was clear as day! You didn’t have a say in the matter….

Reclining your neck on instinct giving him more room to work as you tried to clear your mind of any and everything that wasn’t Hoseok as you let your eyes fan shut. 

“Hoseok…” Staggered out heavily feeling like you were choking and he only offering a hum in response, not letting up from his current mestractions….”Fuck, yeah, okay just- just keep touching me...please” You weren’t typically a beggar even in bed but right now you needed him, not int he mood to be sassy or play hard to get, to be honest, you just didn’t have the energy. 

“I’m not going anywhere baby..I’m right here..all here for you..always…in any way you need me…” Palms soothing down your thighs, reaching under to smoothly wrap them around his waist, bringing his hips flush to yours. Once he felt you secure your ankles he reached for your hands, kissing along your knuckles before sliding them under the back of his shirt. Knowing how skinship puts your mind at ease, and the second the pads of your fingers graze his skin...you’re already finding  yourself digging your nails into his shoulders. Ripping a low growl from his throat, as he rocked his hips forward, re-positioning his arms on either side of your body so his forehead was flush to yours. 

“All here for you, in any way you need me..” That seems to hold a lot more weight as of late and no matter how much you’re trying to rid your mind of those thoughts..you can’t, you fucking can’t. Suddenly you’re clawing at his shoulders for a different reason, and it hurts, and not the fun kinda pain either…he hears a faint whimper leave your lips, as you clung to him even tighter.

“Y/n….” He exhales, voice shaking eyes glazed over, welting full of tears he’s praying don’t fall because he needs to be strong for you right now. “Baby” There was a blatant plea laced within that and you...

“I know, I know…” it’s unsaid...though it’s clearly not unsaid because you know...youuuu know, the two of you avoided that word. Maybe because if you said it that makes the idea of losing each other even worse. So for now, you’d just prefer to endlessly show it…....

Talking would just suck ass right now, so you opted for the later and leaned in, it wasn’t soft or delicate..you kissed him hard. Until he was gasping through his nose to breathe while, almost stifling forward,letting your hands wander up his shirt to thread into his hair.  Tugging at his scalp until you heard him moan against your tongue, taking that as your invitation to lick your way into his mouth which he accepts willingly. Reclining his jaw letting you have control because he figured you could probably use that right now.  Your lips moved with such emotion, and just pure passion that you don’t know if you’d ever felt so weak under him..yet powerful all at the same damn time! You almost feel lightheaded, the more you kiss, tongues meeting with such desperation your chest feels like it’s burning. Teeth clashing, nails clawing so hard into Hosoek’s skin it hurts but he doesn’t give a damn.

You tilt your head back giving him free access to do as he pleases and he bites. Hard. Until he rips a moan right off your tongue and it sounds so damn good….Nipping licking and sucking over every inch of skin he can reach. Feenin to hear you moan over and over again...until your lips find his and your clawing at his v-neck for dear life. Yanking at the neckline until you hear it rip, lifting and tugging it until he finally takes the hint….

“Offff” 

“Come take what you want.” Pulling back to allow you to yank it over his head, exposing mounds of warm and toned honey-coated skin, covered in trails of articulately placed ink. A combination of new-aged back and white with hints of watercolor paint his skin, telling an array of stories that you know like the back of your hand at this point!

Tugging him back by the nape of his neck so his chest is flush to yours, the warmth radiating through the fabric of your dress, which didn’t cover much, to begin with. Rolling your hips up into his for slight friction until your moaning back against his tongue again, hands moving down to help you grind at a steady rhythm. The contrast of the rough material of his jeans, against your clit was really fucking you up right now.  

“Hoseok…”

“Baby” He countered in a way that had your curls trying to curl under the pad of your heels! 

“Fuck, Fuck me,” You whispered against his lips intentionally whiney, and he froze instantly, not that he didn’t want to because fuck he wanted to he just...Hoseok’s big on talking shit out. Not one for hiding or aiding emotions, and clearly there’s something wrong here!

“I really,need you right now”  You whisper again, nipping at his bottom lip and now it’s hopeless because this man knows he can’t deny you a damn thing. He hasn’t been able too since the two of you met in Paris, initially as strangers stood on a roof with your Colt Pistols aiming dead in each other’s faces.

You could feel the frustration growling from his throat but still, he kissed you deeper, harder, rocking you against the desk so your laying on your back. Rolling his hips against you slowly just to hear you moan against his tongue. ‘Hoseok!” Yeah, your whiny, and yeah your inpatient…

‘God, the shit you do to me…” Leaning in to steal your breath away with another deep brusing kiss.There was a hint of frustration and disbelief, lingering within that, and you can’t help but smile up at him, soothing your palms down the smooth planes of his chest. Nails idly outlining the array of cherry blossoms painting his skin, framing his collarbone perfectly. Not even trying to hide how much you loved knowing you had the same effect on him, which in laymen’s terms just means your both helplessly and endlessly whipped! 

Being in this deep, with someone within your world is dangerous, even more so when they’re actually in the field,  not hauled up in a castle, like some modern-day Repunzel. It can make you vulnerable, irrational, hypersensitive, but on the flip side, it can also turn you into the most lethal version of yourself where enemies are concerned. Your need to ensure no one stands in the way of whatever you deem your “Happy Ending” to be, becomes insatiable...you’d set cities ablaze for that man and he’d do the same..in a heartbeat! 

Considering that’s the first, and only smile he’s seen from you in days he can’t help but lean down again. Leaving one more lingering kiss against your lips sighing out in content at how laxed and pliant you feel under him, you already know he’s smiling, you can feel Hoseok's teeth against your lips. Tentatively he untangles himself, not before leaning down a good three or four more times to kiss you again. As if he's going far, hell as if your ass was going any damn where to begin with even if he was. 

Smoothing his hands up your thighs, hiking your dress around your waist in the process, hissing at the fact you opted against panties today. The minute he eased your legs apart not only could he smell how much you need him but he could see...the need dripping from your lips. Wiggling your hips a little, as your arched even further onto the oversized glass desk, shoving the mounds of files to the side, your heels gave you the perfect angle to completely spread out. Putting yourself on full display, the slight elevation on your lower half had your hips tipping slightly forward, giving him  access to everything he needed! Your gaze was far  too innocent for his liking as you batted your lashes in his direction. Easing your hands up your body.. taking a little detour to caress your breast in your hands before letting them get lost in your hair. 

An all-knowing smirk playing on your lips as you watch his eyes slowly unravel every inch of your body. If you didn’t know any better you’d think his mouth was watering, stealth fingers digging into your skin hard enough to leave a mark. Dropping to his knees..

“I don’t-”

“I know, I know”  Leaning forward until his lips were flush with your inner thigh, eyes trained on yours daring you to look away, jerking slightly when he bit you, then a low moan fell off your lips as he sucked on the spot. 

“You sound so fuckin good” Slurred against your skin, teeth sinking into your thigh even harder this time leaving a larger bite mark. Not pulling back until you squirmed from under him, his name husking off your tongue. 

What you meant earlier was you didn't want him to fully prep you tonight, you wanted the pain, the feeling of him stretching you open around his cock instead of his fingers. The delicious burn that almost makes you feel like your on the brink being split open! But I mean, fuck, look at you, he can’t just..not taste you, right? I mean no he HAS to taste you…

Resting his head against your inner thigh, thumbs kneading your skin while he started to kiss  his way around your bikini line. There seems to be no rush and at the moment you were just enjoying the warmth ghosting off his lips so you laid there content. Then, he leaned forward, placing his lips flush against your clit, leaving an array of solid lingering kisses all the way up your lips. And yeah they were somewhat chaste at this point,but you were feeling real needy  right now so even that had you squirming beneath him. 

“Hoseok” Sighed from your lips as you felt goosebumps spread through your body, gently massaging your nipples through your dress, somewhat teasing yourself instead of giving direct contact. Just allowing your touch to ghost over, until you’re arching into your own hand, pinching even tighter but still not giving your body the full sensation . 

“Y/n” Hoseok replied, calm as ever, a smirk playing on his lips as he watched you “God, your so damn sexy…” Slowly his tongue fell from his lips and landed right around your clit, sucking it into his mouth with a moan that shot through every cell in your body. He sucked, and slurped you between his lips so hard, and you damn near smothered him with your thighs on accident. Your body's first instinct was to pull away, there was so much pressure and stimulation being applied to literally the most sensitive region of your body. And it was steady, once he had you wrapped around your tongue that's where you stayed.

“Holy shit-babyyy” Eyes squeezing shut, trying to remember how to breathe!

 Your mind and body weren’t on the same page, thighs practically vibrating on either side of his head and the minute he felt your legs close in, he nipped the skin between his teeth.Forcing you to arch up and away instead of clamping down, a broken cry of his name falling off your tongue as you tried to desperly keep your legs apart. 

He knew you needed a distraction, leaning forward, grabbing your hand and burying it into your hair, making sure you had an almost painfully tight grip on his scalp! You were damn thankful because holding him like this gave you some sense of ground, instead of you feeling like your about to plummet through the glass.

Hoseok always touched you like he wanted too, like he was the one getting off which prompted your next question once the air resurfaced to your lungs. 

“Mmm, fuck your hard for me already aren’t you? Just tasting me get’s my baby hard doesn't it?” You knew the answer but damn if it didn’t feel good to hear him moan it out anyway.

Nipping at your thigh again, this time a little harder “You fuckin, known, what you do to me, I could come right now if I didnt need to feel you come all over my cock” You moaned so loud at that, gripping his scalp even tighter. “That’s it baby, keep me where you want me.” So you did just that. Pushing his head down so he had nowhere to go but your clit, however the smirk you could feel resting against your thigh should've warned you that he was about to rip you apart.

Hoseok circled his tongue around the very tip, meriscally, his strokes were deep and languid, and they ripped you apart. There's no other way to describe the way he’s volleying your pussy around his tongue, right now! The only comparison I can give you is he’s kissing your clit, and every crevice between your lips, as if he was thoroughly exploring every inch of your mouth . He was loud, and messy, in his pleasure where your concerned, the almost primal sound of his lips, and spit smacking against your folds. Low, needy moans vibrating against your skin as if you were the best damn thing he’d tasted all day. Pulling back to spit directly on your entrance, pursing his lips, and blowing , directing it to fall straight in and your body clenched hard. Fuck you needed, him to inside you…. nuzzling his face between your thighs until his nose was flush with your clit. He knew better than to work you open with his fingers so he opted for his tongue. Picking his own lubricate back up with the tip of his tongue and swirling it around the entrance. Moaning at the wall your body naturally started clenching around the muscle. You were a moaning mess beanthe him, hips rocking against his face.

You’re getting antsy now, wiggling your hips harder, you felt like you were close from this alone and that;s not what you wanted “Fuck Hoseok, baby just fuck me…”  Yanking his head until he pulled away, dragging his lips down to meet yours, chin glistening with all traces of you. The kiss was hard, messy,your essence was all you could taste against his tongue, moaning out as he rocked his hips into you. Leaning forward so he could reach into the Hermes gift box which was kinda decoration kinda used to store lube and other shit you really should have in an office! 

The minute he grabbed the bottle you ripped it from his hands, this was the least you could do,plus you just loved how heavy he felt in your palm. Hoseok almost growled as he deepened the kiss, more teeth and tongue than finesse,the kiss is hard, it feels like your both gasping for air the entire time but neither of you want to pull apart. Pulling at his belt with nothing but a whine until he gets the hint and smacks your hand out of the way, within seconds you feel him hit your stomach. Hot, hard, and heavy, and god if you didn't clench so damn hard, he’s literally twitching  on top of you right now.

“Do you even have the slightest idea how fucked up I am for you?  How hard I am and you havent even touched me yet?” 

“Mmm, I don’t know baby it’s been a minute since I’ve seen you...” Your whispers seductive yet taunting,kissing at his jaw and his neck, smiling against his skin at the low moans that spill from his lips. “Tell me..

Digging your heels into his back as you uncapped the bottle, taking an obscene amount in your hand before reaching between your bodies. Ripping a shaky moan from Hoseok's throat once you laced your fingers around his cock. Squeezing just enough to let all the acces lube drizzle down his shaft and land on his balls, he’s just throbbing in your palm right now and your not even moving yet. “Does it make you feel good to know you got me wrapped around your finger? Knowing- I’d- fuck-” Now, your moving,  hand working his shaft, flucuating the way you distribute pressure, loosser at the bottom and tighter twoards the head  becuse thats his sweet spot. Lube just running down your fingers, it’s so damn messy and you love it,he's straight up whining into your mouth right now. Breath fanning against your face as he nuzzles into your skin...lips parted.

“Knowing that you’d what baby?”  Tugging his bottom lip between your teeth, feeling the way his hips twitched above you , so you slow down your pace, and tighten your grip. Hoseok's brows are furrowed chest flushed…..he looks fucking beautiful.

“That I’d kill anyone in a heartbeat for you, that i’d never let a damn thing happen to you” He can't help but rock into your fist even harder, eyes struggling to stay focused but he refuses not to look at you.. “Does that get to you the same way it does me? Because I still get hard thinking about the way you went toe to toe with Jin’s father about me that night in Italy.” Trailing his tongue down the side of your jaw nibbling ever so slightly “That,was-fuck-the sexiest thing I’d ever seen.”

“God, I-...” Licking your way back into his mouth as you continued working him in your hand, moving your thumb over his tip, smearing the mounds of precum into the excessive lube .“Yeah, fuck yeah, it turns me on wayy more than it should. I shouldn't want you to be reckless when it comes to me but god if it's not sexy as all hell knowing you would be…” 

“And I would” he responds with zero Hesitation….

The sudden passion somewhat catches you off guard honestly, and the fire burning through his eyes as he said that is….stifling to say the least. 

“You’d go to war with me baby?” You didn't intend to shift the mood this heavy, yet you couldn't help the way it just vomited off your tongue. Maybe it’s your subconscious talking right now, still trying to fight it’s way through regardless of your current surroundings! 

Reaching up to cup your jaw, tilting your chin upwards, placing the most fragile kiss along your lips . “With you, for you, anyway you spin it the answer is yes...a hundred times over baby it’s yes…” The ache you currently felt coursing through your veins for this man right now...

“I need you in me. Now. I promise will go slow...please let me do this” 

Hoseok held your gaze for a moment before responding, searching your eyes for any hesitation “‘And you’ll tell me if it’s too much..” Grip firm around your waist, not even bothering to phrase it as a question because it wasn’t one...

‘Promise…” Placing the tip right at your entrance,and Hoseok can feel your heat trying to pull him in but he retreats. Giving you full control, keeping your eyes trained on his, well aware that’s what he needed to make sure, he could gauge our pain whether you wanted to admit it or not. Initially, nothing happened neither of you moved, just the faint suction of your very neglected pussy trying to suck him in.

 “I said I wanted you to fuck me...you know my body better than I do..make me take you…” 

‘I-” Yeah. Hoseok.Exe stopped working because he definitely wasn't expecting that, thinking you’d just rock yourself down, not that you wanted him to gauge your restience! Nails raking down his back as you roll your hips against him, making sure he can feel how warm and wet you are, how ready you are..positioning your lips to moan right against his ear.

“Fucking come’re” Hosoek leans forward smashing his lips against yours so hard it hurts, grabbing your legs, bracing them on either side of his shoulders. Sliding your hips forward until the backs of your thighs are flush with his chest, and your red bottoms are facing the ceiling. Gripping his length, teasing the head up and down your folds, as he left a trail of open wet mouthed kisses down your jaw,behind your ear, over to your neck. Ending with his lips nuzzled against your ear…returning the gesture “Missed you, touching you,” Exensuating each word with a kiss “The sound of your voice, waking up to you, being inside you...” Rocking his hips against yours deep, and hard.

You can’t even help but moan at just the mention of him being inside again after what feels like months “Want you, need you....” You’re in rare form tonight, yeah, your always a little submissive with him but not to this extent. 

“Your really tryin to break me today huh?” Tugging your lobe between his teeth before suctioning his lips around your jaw, at this angle Hoseok had the fronts of your thighs colliding with your chest. If he even considers  bringing you back this deep once he’s in you...it’s game over…”You ready?” 

“God yes” Soothing your hands up his stomach once he pulled back, skin hot to the touch and initially nothing happens, just the pressure of Hoseok's tip. Wiggling your hips playfully gives him a little incentive, so he starts to rock forward, and suddenly play times over! Your body freezes dead in its tracks...Hoseok's eyes stay trained on yours the entire time and your jaw clenches at the exact moment your pussy clamps down around his tip. As if you're trying to reroute the pressure elsewhere…A slight whine spills form your lips which lets him know there is still some pleasure laced within all of this.

‘Touch me, keep touching me baby….” Somehow Hoseok appears to be offensively calm regardless of the vice like grip you currently have around him! The request was more for you than him, knowing how much you needed his warmth right now! Clearly your not even close to being settled enough for him to come down flush level yet. So, this will have to do,taking your hands in his, guiding them down his body leisurely. Leading your fingers on a little field trip, sighing contently once you feel how warm and toned he is, how strongly his body reacts to your touch. The way every muscle twitches as you ghost over it, leaving a trail of goosebumps in its wake. Subconsciously you found yourself leaning towards his touch, hissing out once you shifted a little too much for the moment.

“You still with me baby?” 

Nodding slowly as you try to focus, steading your breathing as much as possible, you wanted, no, needed to feel him like this! He can see the pain coursing through your body as the two of you still hold each other's gaze, which is the only thing keeping you grounded right now. Resting his head against your inner thigh, kissing along your skin once he feels his tip breach your quivering entrance. And it’s tight , fuck it’s tight, your body feels like it’s buring from the inside out once you swollow the swell of his head between your lips. Your jaw slacks open and nothing comes out, he’s not even sure if your breathing right now but what he does know is your eyes are still open and focused on Hoseok. 

“Goddamn” Hoseok groans deep and low head lulling back and finally he sounds just as fucked up as you,hand taking a bruisingly hard grip on your hips. He’s actually trying to shift back a little, so he can rock back in, but he can’t. You won’t let him go,“You gotta-shit, you gotta  let me breathe a little baby….fuck” He’s winded and using every once of self control he has to stay stationary, even though your applying a dangerous amout of pressure to the most sesentive regin of this mans shaft. The tip, that's all that's suctioned between your heat and your squeezing him like your trying to break him, and there isn't a damn thing you can do about it.  

 So you try, fuck you try, exhaling then inhaling then exhaling again, attempting to get all your msucles to relax. Only problem is your not even clenching around Hoseok’s cock, you just have him trapped. Your just clamped tight, so tight it hurts, on both ends! He can feel your thighs shaking around him, pulling inwards as if your bodies trying to curl in on itself , and he knows this isn't going to work! He’s hissing hard too, nails digging into the swell of your ass, and thankfully once the two of you make eye contact yours are daggering into him with a silent plea. And he already knows what you want! The real issue is there’s way too much swirling around your head mentally for you to have full control over your senses right now. So, that's when you render him full control of any and every inch of your being to do as he pleases in order to give you what you need.

“Ho-Seok...fuck just-” 

 Reaching out for one of your hands so you can squeeze his as hard as you need, kissing along your knuckles.”Yeah?” 

“Yeah!” Tilting your head back with a beathy whine, squeezing his fingers even tighter….

 “You trust me?” Nodding without hesitation “I need you, to keep your eyes open, and focus, can you do that for me baby? ”  It’s a lot but Hoseok knows your limits and if it was truly too much he’d pull out, you can take it, all of it. Shifting your thighs so there now wrapped around his waist as opposed to above his head.  Pouring an obscene amount of lube on the remainder of his shaft, not even bothering to rub it in, just letting the excess drip onto the table. 

“And if you can’t get your colors out?” 

“Pinch you...I’m good, I know you got me...”A lazy smile tugging on your lips as you just try to stay calm.

“On the count of three, take a deep slow breath through your nose...and don't exhale until I tell you too” Hoseok cups your cheek and you nuzzle into it, kissing the tips of his fingers, you can feel them trembling though he’s trying to appear at ease.. 

“K” Yes wide, but focused, determined...a  little stubborn but hell you've already started right? 

Hoseok's eyes flutter shut briefly, taking in a deep slow breath of his own, making sure he’s in the right headspace to guide you through this. Once those big brown eyes of his creek open and your gazes meet again it’s heavy. Hosoek’s eyes are blown out, half lided, already glazed over, he just looks like sex...and he looks like hes about to break you in all the right ways! 

Adjusting his grip on your hip, steadying himself, thumbing at your side, “Count with me….1” God, the textures in this man's voice where unreal, he just sounds so damn smooth, the hushed command had so much control, and warmth wrapped up in all of 4 words.

He rocks forward, barely...just to see if you’ve loosened up and you still haven’t budged... Flicking his chin in your direction indicating he wanted you to continue…

“Two…” You’d be lying if you aid your heart wasn;t hammering in your ears as you let a deep breath start to fill your lungs.

“Three” Whispped through clenched teeth and he didn’t hesitate, rocking back just a little so he has better leverage tilting his hips upwards and he watches your eyes widen..thighs tense but he doesn't stop. Redirecting all of his weight into his abdomen, grinding down with a deep, heavy roll of the hips, you can feel every muscle in his back within this first thrust. Your fingers twitch in his hold, eyes glazing over relatively quickly, but your still looking at him, barely but you are. Even Hoseok’s breathing a little shaky, brows furrowed, but he's in, his tips fully past your entrance “Let it out baby….” 

And you do, whimpering hard, as a choked out breath hippicus through your chest, initially you were expecting him to pause. Give you a minute to adjust to the initial stretch…..Nope…

He doesn't stop, he's still rolling forward and now your gasping and whimpering all over again, even louder this time! Hoseok’s thumbs bruising the hell out of your hips but you don’t have him stop, you can’t! Your mind and body needs this right now, the tension the burn,all of it! 

“That’s it…” Even though his restricted breathing you can hear the fondness dripping off his tongue. “ Focus on me, I got you” The more he breaches his way through your heat the more the wind gets knocked out of your lungs but it’s good, it’s soo damn good! You manage to somewhat choke out his name and he just hums in response, biting down on his bottom lip in concentration. Untangling his hand from yours to brace both on either side of his head. Hoseoks pushing through steadily now,morphing his way through your heat that’s still trying to fight against him but he doesn't stop.No matter how hard you pulsing around him, Hoseok's shaft drags forward until his balls meet the swell of your asss. And finally he’s right on top of you, your bodies trembling beneath him so he gently lowers himself. Bringing his chest flush to yours letting your wrap your arms around his neck. Clawing your way down his back, intentionally releasing some of the tensions coursing through your veins. Licking his way back into your mouth, kissing deep, and messy until your light headed and desperate. Endless Moans richoching against one other, his palms soothing down your thighs. 

Everything pauses for a while, neither of you move, your both panting hard into each other's mouths while you adjust and Hoseok's not rushing you either. Wanting you to relax a little so he doesn't come after all of 2 strokes, idily  tracing patterns against your skin. Finally able to feel your breathing even out, muscles becoming more laxed beneath him!

“You ready for me baby?,”

All you can do is moan in response, still so overwhelmed, squeezing your legs around his waist as hard as you could so he at least knows your still with him. 

So he does, pulling out and pushing back in, and your eyes automatically roll back at the feeling. It’s still tight as fuck but he’s somehow managing to weave his way through. .

“Hurts?”  He can’t help but ask since your thighs are still shaking a little, and you nod honestly.

“Good pain? Good enough to make my pretty baby come?” More of a statement than a question, you can hear the smirk in his voice, as he kissed down your jaw. Trying to distract you a little,sucking a couple bruises along the front of your neck . Edging his way back and forth building up a steady tempo, and finally Hoseok can feel the shift. He’s able to breathe within you a little better, your letting him wade in a little deeper! 

You exhale shakily and nod again, feeling him shift off of you, repositioning your legs on either side of his shoulders.Leaning forward pressing all his weight into his arms until your thighs are flush to your chest. 

Your mouth opens and closes, kinda like a fish outta water, you do it a few times but not shit comes out.

“Baby…” Kissing up your inner thigh as he gently rocks forward , slowing down a little so you can feel the slow drag of his cock pull you apart. Back arching ever so lightly, moaning out low and wanton “Your so, sexy, doin so good for me” Nuzzling against your skin, nipping lightly at your inner thigh. 

“Your deep” The word barley leaves your tongue “Fuck, faster..”

“Yeah?”

Before you can even respond he snaps his hips forward and you almost scream, nails digging into his disciples as he stares down at you with a smirk that’s..real concerning considering the position he has you in. So he does it again, pulling his cock halfway out and rocking forward, 

“That’s it, that’s what my baby needed,” Hoseok whispers and thrust forward even harder this time, rocking up on the heels balls of his feet as if he’s aiming for your damn ribcage. 

Your mouth falls back open, looking like you wanna moan but you can;t every exhale gets cut off by another deep roll of the hips,repositioning himself so he braced with one arm. Running the other up your face, into your hair, before cradilling your jaw, thumbing at your bottom lip which you nip and suck into your mouth. Humming out contently, as you lick a stipe up his index and middle finger, not missing the way Hoseok’s cock twitches at the added stimulation. 

“Look at you…..” Eyes trailing down your body agnoniziling slow, taking in each and every detail as if it’s the very first times he's ever seen you like this. And still, you can’t help but shutter at the genuine astonishment burning through those lust filled eyes of his. Which eventually land on the site that his is cock dissappring between your wet and swollen pussy, lips just sprawled over his balls just the way he likes “ My baby's so good for me hmm?

“Always…” you whisper eyes rolling back,,completely glazed over, as his fingers fallback from your lips, every inch of your skin feels like it’s on fire right now.

Hoseok gets lost for a minute, watching the way your so pliant and trusting with him, eyes squeezed shut just letting yourself get consumed by all things Hoseok! Pulling back just enough to spit directly on your clit. The texture has your eyes flying open the instantly rolling shut once he brings his thumb down to work the bud at a swift steady pace. 

“Fuckkkk” Whimpering loudly in repsonse “Don’t stop, fuck harder..” And that he does, harder faster every thrust has his balls smacking against your ass. “Fuck, yes! Fuck, you feel so good…” 

“Yeah, yeah...your right there...come on baby…” He can feel you pulsing even harder against him. Not that you ever fully stopped but the tensions different now, more constricted…..he starts thrusting home hard! Spitting an even bigger wad on your clit, mixing it with the extra lube dripping down his balls as he continues ripping your nerves wide open. 

“Fuck, kiss me!” Whiney and bossy as per usual!

Smacking his hand away, exchanging it for your own so you can drag him down and take what you need, placing  your index and middle finger straight to the clit, which was rock hard. Applying as much pressure as possible, until the friction almost burns. Feeling your release dangling right in front of your face.

“Fuck, I’m gonna come...” You whisper out  all of a sudden slowly rocking your hips forward trying to meet his thrust though it’s  kinda hard in this position. 

“Yeah? You gonna come all over my cock? Then let me fill you up until I’m dripping down your thighs...” The kiss is messy more tonuge and teetht han skill, he can feel you, your right fucking there, thrusting into so hard it almost hurts.

Your eyes widen, brows furrowing to the center of your face, breath shuttering in your throat, mouth just parted against his, then your eyes squeezed shut. Fingers still working your clit, and your coming, silent at first until your crying out, voice shattinger , nails dragging from the nape of hoseok's neck down his back! He dosen’t stop fucking you, not even for a second, going just as, and fast as he was before, while you whitherbenathe him. The second he feels you try and pull your hand away he drops his hips even lower, restricting any movements. 

“Don’t fucking stop! Keep coming until I do, I'm right there,ride this out with me baby” He all about growls at you, and you don’t even dare to disobey, to be honest you don’t wanna stop. Body almost working on autopilot to chase the buzz running through your body, running towards it as much as your trying to run away…it’s too much but it’s soo good!

He’s thrusting into you as hard as he can but fuck if his biceps aren’t on fire and he just can’t finish the way he wants...the way he needs. So he pulls out, fast, barley giving you time to whine nevertheless realize what's going on and he slides over next to you. Lying back on the desk and grabbing you within seconds, sinking you back down onto his cock in one swift notion. Nails digging into your hips as he fucks you down onto him, hard, short thrust rip through your body, not making you do a damn thing but try and hang on for the ride! Your gasping hard, tossing your head back once you reconnect your hand with your clit. Attempting to roll your hips down and meet the pace he’s set but it's merciless… and he’s picking up speed quickly. 

“jesus-fuck-Ho-oseok!” Your nails are raking into this man's chest so hard you wouldn't be surprised if you broke skin but he’s groaning deep and that’s only egging you on! 

His honey coated complexion’s just dripin, brows furrowed, eyes barley ajar, Hoseok seems to be returning the favor. His thumb is about a second away from leaving a permanent indentation and it hurts but you need it. Not even a question as to if you guards can hear you or not your loud! Voice trashed, and very swipe of the hand has you jerking and twitching above him because your clits sentive as all fuck, but goodamn if he dosen’t look good, forhead sweaty  jaw slacked. 

“Y/n, Y/n, fuckk” He’s whining high and needy, heats rashing over his body, and you feel his balls tighen against your ass, and now he turly is right there. You can feel him twitching hard inside you.

“Come onnn baby, you know I fuckin want it, you know I wanna be fu-” There’s a choked out tear rolling down your cheek your bodies spazing so damn hard, it’s painful. Before you can even make sense of what’s happening your crying, and your clenching and coming all over again, your bodies completely spent. Toppling on top of him, instantly because...what the hell just happened?? 

 You clamp down tight around his cock unintentionally, body just luid, and spasming above him and you both moan and that’s when he comes, hard. Eyes open, and locked with yours, a low goan of your name falling from his lips as he spills into you. Hoseok’s shaking beneath you but he doesn't even try to pull out, reaching up to gently brush the tears off your cheek. Taking your hand in his, and sucking those same two fingers into his mouth, eyes locked with your as he does so, and your too damn spent to even react properly. Slowly he still continues thrusting into you, leaning up to press a couple soft kisses against your lisp, humming contently as you taste yourself.  Adjusting his grip so he has one hand, caressing the back of your neck and the other wrapped around your waist. Rubbing slow soothing circles down your spine, as he cards his fingers through your hair, your chest heaving together in unison as your bodies slowly come down. 

“Hi” The words hush off your tongue with a lazy, and utterly exhausted smile, eyes too heavy to open until you feel his teeth pressing against your lips. Letting you know he's smiling too and I mean, fuck, who are yuo to declien a front row seat to to watch the sunrise!

“Hi baby…”  Leaning up to press another linger kiss against your lips as his hips to a halt, just letting you simmer around him. Even the slight stimulation was enough to have both of you moaning out in overstimulation...

________________________________________________________________

The comedown was always slow between the two of you so it’s not a surprise that your bodies and tongues stayed tangled together long after Hoseok came. Eventually, the desk got a little uncomfortable, Hoseok's damn near stuck to it ,there's so much heat radiating off his skin.  So he wraps you in his arms and plops the two of you down on the couch. All the while , his cocks still bured between your lips, your dress is still flipped over your ass and his jeans and hanging low against his thighs! 

“How you feelin?”Pressing delicate kisses all over your face, hands rubbing your inner thighs because he knew they were burning by now.

“Tired” You pouted, mumbling slightly...

“Well, I guess I did my job then huh?” A faint smirk tugging on his lips, as he kissed down your jaw….

Once the two of you settled on the couch Hoseok waits a moment, opting to see if you’d want him to pull out though he should’ve known better, the two of you fall asleep like this more times than not! Gently stroking his fingers down your back in hopes it would coax you into talking without him having to pry it out of you!  The longer you lot sat in silence the faster your heart rate got, Hoseok could actually hear it echoing throughout the room. Leaning down to press a flurry of kisses into your scalp trying to ease you in anyway he could. Eventually, the T-rex in the room was starting to feel a little suffocating sooo...

“He’s just not...doing well, like…. at all…” Tone flat, as if you were trying to remove yourself from the situation at hand. Purposely nuzzling into the side of his neck, bussing yourself with the chains dawning his collarbones. The lack of eye contact wasn’t because you were embarrassed it’s because you just really didn’t wanna cry. You came wayyyy too hard your body can’t handle shit else! 

“I know-I know we’ve known this for a while…” There was this really thick lump hammering in your throat that really didn’t want to leave, the stability within your tone was swiftly heading south. Hoseok could hear it too, no matter how muffled you sound, suddenly more kisses were being pressed into your scalp.

“I guess, I was just fucking naive because he was doing soooo damn good earlier in the year ya know? ” Eyes fluttering up to meet his tentatively, your lashes fanning his skin gave that away, and he gazed down instantly. A dry chuckle leaving your throat, shaking your head as if your the butt of your own joke, but didn’t find it funny nor did he find it naive. 

Holding you even tighter, if that was possible…Those big brown eyes of his were soft and so damn fond of you it was actually ridiculous. If only your enemies could see you now, two of the most notoriously cutthroat people in the industry, throwing googly eyes back and forth! Looking like a couple in some cheesy Netflix romcom! Leaning down to press a lingering kiss on your lips, not pulling back until you released the breath that apparently only he knew you were holding. 

 ”Listen to me baby, there’s nothing naive about being hopeful, there’s also no handbook on how to handle your father dying. Even if you know it’s coming sooner than later..doesn't make any of this shit easier...”

“I know but...fuck…” Shifting slightly so your sitting more upright arm propped on the cushion behind his shoulder. “It’s just a lot, because I feel like I can’t fully do my job because if I do, I’ll miss something. Maybe I’ll miss...it, I mean Germany for fuck’s sake! That’s totally something I’d typically go on..instead, I forced y-”

Leaning down to press his lips against yours again, hoping you’d get the hint “In case you forgot..I volunteered, you never asked...you didn’t have too. And my job, for the record, is whatever you need it to be!” There was nothing but fire blazing into your eyes right now, he needed you to feel that, that he’s here for whatever you need..whenever you need it...however you need it! 

“I know, Seok-baby I know, and I appreciate that more than you’ll ever know” Reaching out to cup his jaw, melting at the way he instantly nuzzled into your palm before giving it a kiss. 

“However, I’m suppose to be in charge, I’m suposed to be in control, and I’m not.. I’m already falling apart and he’s not even gone yet…” That sentence alone had you feeling like you wanted to throw up! “I mean can you fuckin imagine how much of a wreck I’m gonna be?” Hoseok could hear how agitated you were getting so he opted to just stay quiet until he was sure you were done talking…

“Seok, I’m going to fall a fucking part-” You tried to turn your head before the tear rolled down your cheek but you failed, voice breaking off before you could even continue your thought. Hastily whipping your face as if you were mad at yourself for being so emotional right now. Nails daggering into his but he didn’t pull away, he let you be, he’s felt way worse. 

“This empire, his, empire is going to fall, apart, and any legacy my family ever had will  go up in flames! And who’s fucking fault will that be!? Huh? Not my brothers, Nothing’s ever his fault, how the hell does that work out!?” Your voice was hammering so hard in your chest it almost sounds as though your speaking straight into an industrial fan!

“ The one who fucked up everything gets to just ease by like nothing ever happened! Cause lord knows he’s too too damn much of a junkie to even tie his fuckin shoes nevertheless run the family business! It’s not that I didn't want this, I just don’t think I’m ready...nobody asked me if I was ready, my own fuckin brother never even offered to help like-I-fuck!” 

And now your crying again, great, great…..your first instinct was to get up, get away, move, break more shit I don’t know! Just anything, but sitting in this man’s lap, those assassin reflexes though, Hoseok caught your thigh before you could completely ease off the couch. Shifting your weight again, helping you pull out, you were far too gone to even react to the slight sting you should’ve felt. Slamming you back down so your hips were flush against his pelvic bone, holding you so your body hovered over him. You knew the position was so he could look straight through your damn soul but you couldn’t handle that right now….eyes fluttering down to your lap instead. 

“Y/n” No, he needed you to look at him, gently reaching down to cup your tear-stained face, eyes, and nose rivaling a blowfish!  

“And I say again…you don't have to do this alone anymore. I’m here for you, for you my baby, in any, and every way you need. You wanna regroup and brainstorm as to how I can help more let’s do it, if you need me on the field more let’s fuckin do it! Whatever you need to make this easier just tell me .” His pause was intentional holding your gaze, making sure you felt that. Allowing you to search his eyes for any hints of uncertainty that he already knew you’d never find. 

“And if you fall apart guess what!? I’ll be there to help put you back together time, and time again...and this empire will be fine. Stop, stop thinking everyone’s gonna leave you, you’ve been acting as your father’s second in command since you were 19! More importantly, you’ve been running shit with very little delegation for well over a year and if anything this operation flourished. Give yourself more credit, everyone here thinks highly of you, and not because they have too...it’s because your someone worth being admired. Regardless of how dirty our work may be, you and I both know there’s still a way to run this with some heir of dignity! “ 

Reaching up to grab you by the nape of your neck, bringing your forehead down to rest against his own...hoping it would ground you a little “You got this baby..and you got me...I’d burn down the world for you in a second if need be and you know it! Imma get you through this...I promise!”

You let your eyes flutter shut briefly, trying to calm down, you could feel him pressing light kisses against your tear stained cheeks and you couldn't help but smile. Yeah, it was small, definitely did not reach your eyes but it was something...

“I know we aren’t the most honorable people, and he won’t get some fuckin gold plaque like the Mayor when he dies but my dad was a very honorable man for the work he did. And I’ve always tried to do the same, I just..fuck I just want him to be proud of me….I mean at least that.”  Your face hurts you were trying so hard not to cry anymore, a shaky breath ghosting off your lips. 

“He’s already never gonna see me, grow old or walk down the aisle or-.fuck..”  Shit…Hoseok look’s utterlly terried as to where this is going....

“Fuck, he’s never gonna see me walk down the aisle one day” Eyes wide, panicked I guess this was the first time you’d had that thought...the first time you’re really thinking about all the things you’d have to do without him. You've always promised yourself that regardless of how crazy your world is...eventually once you're settled you’d stop denying your heart of its desires! 

Having someone to endlessly love and share this empire with is something you’ve always wanted...and something your father always told you, you deserved and would have one day! 

“Hes nev- holy shit what if I have ki-oh my god.” Every word felt as though it was strangling you, as it hiccups from your chest “ Oh. My. God ” Now this was a lot, this was pain strong enough to split you in half, all the thoughts you’d been avioding suddenly rushed to the surface! 

Your full blown sobbing into the side of his neck … and Hosoek’s heart hurts , fuck it hurts. slouching down into the couch, engulfing your body into his arms which only made you cry even harder. Ya know what makes it even worse? Is that there isn’t a damn thing he can do about this kinda pain. There’s no one he can shoot or stab to make it go away and it’s fucking gut-wrenching, as your body breaks apart above him . 

“Shhh,your okay baby, it’ll be okay….” Even Hoseok didn’t believe that, he didn’t have the slightest idea as to how he was going to get you through losing the first man you ever loved! But fuck if he wasn’t going to try! 

“Listen to me, stop, don’t do that to yourself” Gripping the sides of your face tight enough in his palms to force you ro focus on him and only him. “Let’s get you home alright? Will talk about work and all the other bullshit later you just need-”

“Y/n! Y/n!” 

Who the actual hell...

The sound of someone squawking your name like they’d lost their damn minds had both of you rerouting your attention. Completely shattering the moment causing your body to tense on command. Your brains been wired for so many years to just cut off emotions at the blink of an eye it almost happens on autopilot now! Zoning in on the chaos that appears to be unfolding outside your door and within seconds your pain becomes old news! Which is….just great for your mental health but carry on! 

You could hear your guards all standing outside the door trying to calm whoever this person is with a very clear death wish down. However, they didn’t seem to falter.

“Y/n, open the damn door now! This is serious you can’t just shut me out like this!!” 

But wait, wait, wait, random’s don’t just get acess into the compound so there’s only so many options…

Then, you start to recognize the tenor...and so does Hoseok, and he’s fucking livid. You could literally feel every muscle in his body tense from beneath you. Reaching down to snatch you off his lap, and tucking  himself back into his pants so damn fast you almost got whiplash. If he wasn’t soft before he definitely was now! 

“You’ve gotta be shitting me!” Striding over to your desk to grab your Glock34 from the drawer. 

“I fuckin told him not to come here today...” Growled through gritted teeth, as he reloaded your gun, spinning the barrel. 

Shit.

”Yn! YN! We need to talk about what’s going on with dad!” The slow-motion drawl said it all, he’s high as hell and it’s your fucking brother…

“Ohhh, he wants to talk about your father?!” Tone loud and Exaggeratedly cheerful as they leave his lips sing song esque “Of fucking course he does!” 

“Hoseok-” Yeah, this wasn’t ending well, swiftly readjusting your dress back around your thighs. Though your thighs felt like a damn slinky you still ran over to barricade yourself in front of the door! The door that your brother was still banging on like a fucking idiot!

“Jason. Leave!!!” Praying the distress resonated through the pans of marble, your just now realizing how gone your voice truly is, honestly you don’t even know if he heard you. But for his sake, you hope it did, because it Hoseok gets through this door...

“Nooo,Jason stay!” 

“Hoseok…” Bracing your hand firm against his chest, pushing him away from the door. The warning laced within your tone was clear as all hell, no matter how brittel it was .

“Nah, he wants to talk, let’s fuckin talk! He’s the last thing you need to be worrying about right now, considering he only gives a fuck about you when he’s tapped out of his monthly allowance! What? All of a sudden he cares so deeply about your father?” Brow arched knowingly “ Let him even fix his mouth to say the word “Will” and I will buss a cap so far up his asshole, he’ll cough out all the coke he’s been sniffin’!”

“Y/n, I can have him escorted-”

“One second Spade!” That mans been around since you were in middle school. You know the sound of his voice anywhere, yeah even muffled through a marble wall.

“Comere” Tone dropping to a purr, that you knew wans’t fair but fuck it, no matter how angry he’s on you in seconds, like I said...he can’t deny you anything. 

Leaning forward to wrap your arms around his waist and you can feel how tense his body is initially...yet he still instinctively lets his hands find their home right on the swell of your ass. The edge of the glock resting against your waist…..

 “Baby, I know your angry, and I know that’s mostly because of me, hell I was just chewing him out a second ago. But at the end of the day he is my brother and that is our dad...that’s damn near on a fuckin resperator. I know how to keep him at arms length... I don’t have the mental capacity for this right now. But, I’m gonna open that door, and see what the hell he wants, and I need you, for me...to just chill. If he gets outta line I’ll have him escorted out.”  He physically growled at that, Hoseok would much rather handle this on his own.

Leaning up to card your fingers through his hair, acting as if you didn't even notice his little tantrum “I really need you by my side tonight, and I need you to stay calm,because I’m far from it. Let’s hear him out and if he steps out of lines he’s out.” 

Wrapping his hand around the one you have laced within his hair “You already know I can’t say no to you!” He’s pissed about it too, long gone are the days when he could just do what he pleased regardless of who it affected. 

“But I swear to go Y/n, if and when he steps outta line-fuck-you just better make sure,  your boys are ready to throw his ass out ...because if I do it...he’s gonna end up in the ER for more than just wirthdrawls!”

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THAT’S ALLL SHE WROTE FOR NOW…KINDA I ALSO WROTE HALF OF PART TWO, SO IF YOU ENJOYED SHOW THIS SOME LOVE AND COME TALK TO ME! My GENERAL RULE OF THUMB IS AS LONG AS SOMETHING GETS AT LEATS 100 LIKES I’LL CONSIDERING ADDING TO IT DOWN THE LINE!

ALSO,  A LITTLE BONUS BECAUSE I DID MAP OUT THE FIRST 4 CHAPTERS BACK WHEN I WROTE THIS...

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It’s clear the OC’s brother will probably/definitely be an issue, in more ways then one! As well as her father is obviously going to die, like, within the first couple of chapters.

Her family’s association is called “Grim” and she’s commonly known as “The princess of the Grim clan”. 

There is a 2nd member set to be introduced in part 2 that will eventually work for the OC...hint it’s a makane! He tries to robe one of their local establishments and well...clearly that probably won’t end too well…

Jin is a mob associate...his family's Forbes ranked multi-million dollar empire was founded with blood money! Sooo, he’s a mutual between “Grim” and “The King Tapian’s”.

3 of the other members are in another association overseas called “The King Tapian’s”. A name she’s heard of, as they have one hell of a rep but they’ve never “officially” crossed paths. That is, until another death within the mob world which brings a new territory on the market! One that her fathers been eying for years over in Europe! (Another hint, they kinda join forces and eventually agree to co-inhabit the area in efforts to shove another “shysterier” gang out, which in turn starts a little war if you will!) The other members would be a sub-focus however It was undecided as to how big of a part they’d all play!

 Lastly, the final member is a freelance hacker/hitman that knows Hoseok very well, so much so the pair used to fool around back in the day so yes that would make him BI! 

I was also undecided if I wanted to incorporate another member sexually or not...as I’d dabbled with the idea of them being in an open relationship! There was also the possibility of making the “King Tapian” Boys lowkey poly! Either solely male on male or maybe throw in the idea of a minor female character who i’d name so there’s no confusion! 

The overall gist of the story was essentially the OC finding her footing after her father dies. Making her own path as one of the only women in charge on the black market! While also creating some allies and gaining of course some enemies along the way! Regardless this would also be a Hoseok centered series with the possibility of semi regular OT7 guest appearances!

  Love you as always,

Rocki,

[sunshine304]

On to eps 21 + 22! I’ve also already watched 23, but it’s easier to just do it in smaller sized posts. This will likely be long enough.

- So we begin with a fight scene between Li Zheng + Yin Pei’s father (=Yin Wenlan, I looked it up, because I never remember that name, I’m sorry Sword of the Mountain), while a young Md. Nichang watches and a cool song plays. This is kinda awesome and we see where Zhou Fei gets her sword breaking habit from: both heroes break their swords and then laugh about it. XD They seem to be fast friends and did this fight for... show? because they could? - did I hear a „zhiji“ in there? Yes, Yes I did! \o/ The gif option of tumblr is letting me down even though there are some really cool shots in this scene and there’s SYMBOLISM.

- Because Zhou Fei is awesome and starry-eyed she gets the blade that Md. Nichang made for Li Zheng. She never got the chance to give it to him and aww now she’s happy that his granddaughter has it. There’s also a new blade for Yin Wenlan’s descendant…

- … So I guess we need to check in on him, right? Yin Pei’s been hanging out at the abandoned Big Medicin Valley, where that old Daoist master (who helped Li Sheng) brought him after rescuing him from bad guys who wanted his sword (is it the broken sword or is it just the scabbard?). The old master sure gets around rescuing young man in peril and is called “Qong Xiao“ by a kid, so I guess that’s his name.

- Seems that Yin Pei, who is arrogant and abbrasive as ever, has some internal injury as well that hinders him doing martial arts. Did that happen during his time with Zhou Fei? I’m not sure, I don’t remember that… or did it happen afterwards? Anyway, Qong Xiao says he was a friend of Yin Pei’s father and so of course wants to help him, while Yin Pei is suspicious of him (because everyone wants that broken sword).

- Hallelujah, Uncle Ma meets A-Fei in town! A-Fei wants to meet up with Md. Nichang again, but her whole troupe is gone. Seems that’s how they do it. A-Fei introduces Xie Yun as “a friend“ which is perhaps the nicest thing she’s ever said about him, but XY obviously hoped for more.

- There is a weird scene at a clothes shop where Uncle Ma buys cheap stuff and A-Fei wonders why he doesn’t spend more money on better clothes. I think... I might not have understood some implications here.

- No surprise that Yang Jin is in the same town stalking A-Fei because he can’t get over the lost fight. *sighsigh* Good thing I like him.

- Short interlude with Li Sheng and Chuchu who want to buy clothes as well (but somewhere else). It all seems suspicious and Li Sheng suddenly doesn’t feel so well. I wondered if that was yet another payed off secret post but since ChuChu can buy the horse I guess not? Weird. But there were some cute, huge hearteyes from Li Sheng to Chuchu. XD

- OMG A-Fei doesn’t even know the procedure of how to get into 48 Strongholds. XD XY takes this opportunity to tease her mercilessly. I would’ve done the same thing. XD

- We cut to the old river guardian at 48 strongholds, who used to be the head of the MingFeng Sect. He has a conversation with Kou Dan, who belonged to the sect. That sect used to be in spy business. I get weird vibes from this scene. There’s some talk of how MingFeng Tower/Sect got on the bad side of “someone“ (Disha? because it’s always Disha…) and that past is now catching up to them. I find Kou Dan suspicious. The music also tells me shit’s going down.

- As a treat at th eend of this ep we get to see A-Fei’s father for once (is this a “let’s check in on several kinda important people“ ep?)! He’s worrying because General Wen didn’t bring XY back. He’s also worrying over Disha’s movements.

- A cute scene with A-Fei and XY on a rooftop, drinking. XY flirts and A-Fei is offended like, “Hey I wanted to have a serious conversation for once!“ >:(   These two! ♥

- XY tells her he’s used to wandering around and likely would find settling down somewhere boring. A-Fei seems to be unhappy about it, like she’s so used to him by now, going, “You wouldn’t stay?“ with huge eyes. XY manages to read the room, but of course has to hide behind quips and goes, “Well, if your mother makes me her son-in-law I’d have to stay!“ *winkwinknudgenudge*  A-Fei, annyoed: „Pff in your dreams.“ XD

- Finally! Li Sheng and Chuchu are in the same town as all the others and meet Li Yan (who is yet again walking around unsupervised, because that worked out well last time, but whatever), and Yang Jin, who follows Li Yan like a lost duckling. Upon hearing that Li Sheng is a descendant of the South Blade, Yang Jin immediately goes into “fight mode“. XD Li Sheng looks like a confused puppy, and Li Yan has to scold that saber-carrying himbo. I love them.

- Bad shit with Kou Dan is going down at 48 strongholds, I knew it! Look at her goooo!

- Romance! XY and A-Fei in the dark on a hill with a view. XY (being the poet he is): “The moonlight is the same everywhere. But the people beneath the moon are not the same.“ Significant glance to A-Fei. Please A-Fei, get a hint. They’re so cute.♥

- So okay, Kou Dan wants to restore the MingFeng Tower to its former glory. They were super spies. The only group who can now be considered good spies are the Feather Robe Troupe. The old river guardian is now dead and of course Kou Dan is in league with Disha. What else is new?

- A-Fei and XY are alerted to problems at 48 Strongholds because of birds. Fair enough. They immediately think that Disha somehow is involved in whatever shit’s going down there and want to go intervene.

- Suddenly it’s day! A-Fei & Co arrive at the open gate to the 48 Strongholds, not good. (Was it such a long treck that they arrive in broad daylight after setting out immediately? Who knows.) They assume Disha lies in wait and take another route.

- Kou Dan (whom I find really cool and pretty btw) meets up with the second master of Disha… uhm Gu Tianxian. Had to look that up because I’d already forgotten him again. There are so many overdramatic Disha masters, come on!

- So cute how XY coaches A-Fei to get the Elders to listen to her. And the Elders are how they always are: Old Men bickering without actually getting anywhere. Several Sect Leader Yaos in one place. XD

- Li Sheng and the second disciple/captain of the guard (?) are working on dispatching Disha in the forest and are doing very well, while A-Fei & Co meet Gu Tianxian and his people plus Kou Dan and her people. Stand off in the forest!

- The fight between A-Fei and Kou Dan is cool! I dig it.

- Best bit is: Gu Tianxian wants to talk it out and everyone’s just standing around politely not killing each other. XD I was wondering why they just... stand there. Listening to the reports instead of, you know, killing everyone who isn’t needed as bait or ransom? The villains all have such nice manners!

- Li Sheng has learned a lot! His bluff worked perfectly! I didn’t think at the beginning that I would start liking him so much.

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I rewatched the second season of South Park and took so many notes that I had to split them into two parts. Like seriously, I took so. many. notes. And pictures this time. I started rewatching just in case I’d find some cool little facts to sprinkle into my fanfic but I went way too far and now there’s a million facts under this cut (including gay stan, a domestic violence psa, and craig fucking dying)

Stan doesn’t like hospitals, he finds them gross and he gets sick 🤮. Also the hospital in South Park is called Hell’s Pass hospital. Early seasons have the name as Hells Pass but it gets fixed later

Cartman has to sing all of Come Sailing Away by Styx if he hears a part of it. After he says this, Kyle sings the first part and Cartman has to sing the rest. Kyle does it again later, which is kinda mean

Cartman’s mom tries to abort Cartman, who is an eight-year-old child and thus cannot be legally aborted. Later, after she slept with Bill Clinton to change the law and make 40th trimester abortions legal, it turns out she meant adoption

Kenny sacrifices himself to turn on the generator to the hospital and save Dr. Mephesto’s life along with others. He says “I’ll fucking do it” then does it and dies, absolute legend

Cartman gets way too into his deputy role. He goes undercover, pretends to be a prostitute, says “Respect my authoritah!” a lot and beats people up with his police stick

Kenny’s brother first appears when Cartman responds to a call about a disturbance at Kenny’s house. Apparently there are like 10 adult family members in the house at that time. Kenny’s dad has a black eye because Kenny’s mom punched him. She says he can’t hold a job

Token sits in the classroom in season 2

Cartman starts hating hippies in this season, like a lot

Chef tells the boys that the right time to do drugs is in college

Ike’s name is Ike Moisha Broflovski and he was born in 1996, making him 2 years old in 1998 when this season aired

This is probably obvious but yeah Kyle and Ike are circumcised

Kyle says family isn’t just blood, it’s who you care about, and he says “That’s why you guys are more than just friends, you’re my family. Except for Cartman.”

Craig’s finally sitting in the classroom in S02E04

None of the boys like dodgeball

Clyde gets a dodgeball to the face and he cries :( and he’s the only one who cries by the way

Pip throws a dodgeball in Kyle’s face and breaks Kyle’s nose

When Kyle’s mom tells the boys about conjoined twin myslexia (which isn’t a real term) and says anyone might’ve absorbed their dead twin in the womb, Stan and Cartman run away screaming but Kenny and Kyle stay to listen. Kenny even leans in to look at the book “Freaks A-Z!” that Mrs. Broflovski is reading from, and when she leaves, Kyle grimaces and Kenny laughs

Stan’s mom (Sharon) calls Kyle’s mom (Sheila) when Stan is all freaked out and trying to put an icepick through his brain, and Sharon tells Sheila to get run over by a truck. Sharon is pretty mean in these early episodes

Mr. Broflovski doesn’t really listen to what Mrs. Broflovski is saying, bad husband >:(

South Park’s team is always called South Park Cows no matter the sport

The school nurse, Nurse Gollum, went to Colorado State University

I just realized Butters exists. I think he appeared before S02E05 but I didn’t notice but yeah he’s there with the dodgeball team, injured

Here’s a picture to make up for my disgusting anti-Butters bias

Kenny’s dodgeball uniform number is 69 obviously. Kyle is 7, Stan is 4, Cartman is 325

Sheila smacks Gerald in the face so hard he falls off his chair, lots of violence perpetrated by women in this show. Remember, don’t do domestic violence no matter your gender, it’s not cool

I realized after this whole Butters thing that I should’ve made more notes about Pip, so I’ll make a note about his anger issues now. When people call him French, he gets angry and throws dodgeballs at them

The boys launch a jelly roll at Ms. Crabtree and make her crash the bus. They do it just for fun

The kids somehow go to China in the school bus

Cartman references Moby Dick, but he probably doesn’t know what he’s talking about

Kevin Stoley gets named in S02E05 and has his first speaking role when he says he has Chinese parents and after Cartman hears it he immediately says something racist. smh cartman, what a problematic fave

Cartman says “I love you guys 😊” but Stan and Kyle just stare at him and he goes 😐 “Eh, screw you guys 😠”

If Jimbo and Ned really fought in Vietnam, they youngest they could’ve been in 1998 is early forties, which means in the latest seasons they would be early sixties. Btw they met in Vietman

Jesus and Pals is a recurring TV show in seasons 1 and 2. Jesus just kind of lives in South Park

I just remembered that Terrance and Phillip are really old in canon, it’s so weird, like how can South Park canon still be changing, it’s been 20 years

Also the early seasons are casually racist who knew

Kenny flashes his ass on a tape the boys send to Jimbo and Ned’s TV show, which airs and at least 12 people see Kenny’s bare naked ass

Cartman really doesn’t like hippies in these early seasons. He throws a chair at Ned and yells, “Take that, hippie!” (Ned is in a catatonic state and did nothing to provoke this)

Jimbo and Ned live together I guess. Jimbo’s gonna take Ned home and show him some hardcore porn to snap him out of his catatonic state, good husband unlike Gerald Broflovski

Saddam Hussein is in hell and has a Canadian accent and is Satan’s lover in S02E06, I guess he died in Canada in the first episode this season but I wasn’t paying much attention since that’s the Terrance and Phillip episode that pissed a bunch of people off in 1998 because the audience wanted to know who Cartman’s dad is instead. It was kind of a boring episode so I understand why everyone was pissed, but it is funny that Matt and Trey did that so I’m not mad about it

Aww look at them!!! We’ve got background Style, the vaguest inkling of Crenny, and Cartman/Cake

I’d take more screenshots but it’s a pain since I’m watching legally and stupid legal websites block screenshots so I have to find youtube videos instead ughhhh piracy is the answer kids

Apparently there’s a huge waterfall and canyon somewhere close to South Park, maybe? At least in Stan’s dream

Mary Kay Bergman was an incredible voice actor. How the hell did she voice all the moms, Wendy, Shelly, principle Victoria, the mayor, Nurse Gollum, and fucking Ms. Crabtree??? Holy shit what a queen

Kenny has some feelings about death. He reimagines the episode where death boops him to death and in his version, he beats death the fuck up, then has ice cream and is happy 😊 But again, this is in Stan’s dream

S02E07 kind of establishes that nobody remembers Kenny dying because when Cartman tells a story where Kenny dies, Kyle questions how Kenny could’ve died then when he also died just a few hours ago when a giant monster took him

rip craig, he falls out the bus and into a canyon

But it’s okay because it was all Stan’s dream so everything in the episode is questionable. Everything after this is no longer a dream

Pip’s parents are dead and he has to go to summer school while everyone else is having a nice summer break

Officer Barbrady and the mayor are having sexual relations, I’m sure this is the most interesting note I’ve made so far. Idk I’m just writing everything down, this is how I enjoy things, I have no off switch

Ew summer bus stop, cursed

Kyle casually sings little tunes every once in a while, how cute

This is pretty obvious but Kenny likes dirty jokes, he laughs when Cartman innocently says he loves Chef’s salty chocolate balls (which are chocolate candy). Nobody else laughs

Cartman says “Screw you guys, I’m going home” or variations of it a lot in this season

So Stan throws up when he likes someone, right? Well, he’s watching an indie movie about two gay cowboys who start making out and he throws up, which is either a terrible homophobic joke or confirmation that Stan’s a little gay. I know which one I prefer

Kyle says Mr. Hankey is his best friend after Stan. Like I know it’s definitely canon that Stan and Kyle are best friends but it’s still nice to see confirmation, it’s very precious. Also Kyle is best friends with literal shit, so cute 😊

Kenny deaths:

S02E02 Kenny sacrifices himself by connecting a generator wire, which electrocutes him but brings power back to a hospital

S02E03 A tree falls on Kenny and crushes him

S02E04 Kenny falls in a grave and the gravestone falls on him

S02E05 The Chinese dodgeball team throws a ball at Kenny and he gets splattered against a wall

S02E06 Two guys pull on Kenny and tear him in half, as in one has the head and one has the legs

S02E07 A big scary monster plucks Kenny out of the school bus and carries him away. Also in Cartman’s fake memory of Fonzi jumping over cars, the motorcycle hits Kenny and crushes him against a brick wall. Kenny gets smashed against walls a lot, doesn’t he?

S02E08 Flashback: Baby Kenny has a firecracker and it explodes, sprinkling little baby Kenny parts everywhere. Later in the episode, current day Kenny dies when a giant firework snake bumps him off a stage and under a fence, which then crushes him.

S02E09 Kenny is playing with a yoyo outside a movie theatre when a bunch of people come outside and trample him to death. They say “Oh my God, I found a penny!” and “You bastard!”

I’ll post part 2 of season 2 in a couple days. I’m having way more fun writing these stupid notes than I thought I would (also gnomes is coming up soon and i am fucking ready for tweek)

[kinksvt]

baby (m)

requested: 

anon: sub minghao (maybe involve some pretty collars and polaroids oops oops)

→ pairing: sub!minghao x dom!reader (f)

♕ summary: for you and minghao’s anniversary, you decide to surprise him and switch things up.

✱ warnings: pegging, dom & sub roles, overstimulation, uh anal? fingering?

✱ word count: 5.1k

It was the two year anniversary of you and your boyfriend Minghao today and you planned on giving him something he—hopefully—will never forget.

Since the time you knew him before dating, Minghao was always sweet and gentle. Even in the bedroom, he treated you like a doll and never hurt a hair on your head. He always gives and never expects things in return. Today you wanted to change that.

You had to admit, you have thought of taking charge in the bedroom, to "spice things up" as everyone usually says. You have on many occasions thought about what it would be like to control Minghao, to please him and have him obey your every order. To hear him beg, whine and pled for you to do something already. You could hear it all in your head already, his soft, innocent voice asking you to touch him, ride him-

"Y/N?" A voice said, interrupting your sinful train of thought.

"Yes? Sorry, I zoned out for a bit." You excused yourself, trying to fight the blush that threatened to take over your face.

Your friend looked at you curiously. You were out with your two friends, having breakfast and all you could think about was domming your boyfriend. What kind of weirdo were you?

Minghao was in the studio, helping to record for his group's upcoming album. He had been in the studio all day and sometimes all night for the past week. It worried you a bit because you knew how stressed he gets and how much pressure he feels during the process. So this gift for him would hopefully help in more ways than one.

"So Y/N, how's Miiiinghao?" Your friend said in a teasing voice, moving her eyebrows.

You smiled, "Well," you smirked. "He's good, but today is our anniversary and I'm planning on surprising him." Winking at the end you laughed to yourself, thinking about the plan.

"Ooh," your other friend said, nudging your arm. "And what are you planning you sex demon?"

Laughing, you gently pushed her elbow away. "I don't kiss and tell."

Your friends chuckle and you three continue to eat.

Minghao texted you later on when you were walking with your friends.

[2:41 pm] Haohao: Hey baby, session is going good, hopefully I'll be done before 11 tonight.

[2:42 pm] You: That's great! I have a surprise for you when you get home btw hehe

[2:42 pm] HaoHao: Oh? And what might that surprise involve?

[2:43 pm] You: Looks like you'll have to wait and find out ;) I love you, see you tonight <3

[2:43 pm] HaoHao: You are such a tease. I love you too, see you tonight baby.

You smiled to yourself and continued walking with your friends to your next destination.

And throughout the whole day you had to excuse yourself for daydreaming. You couldn't get the thought of what you'd do to Minghao later that night out of your head for the life of you.

...

After a long day of hanging out with your friends at various shops and malls, you had finally come home. You carried a few bags that had new outfits, including the one you found to hopefully wear for Minghao when he also came home. You brought your bags up to you and Minghao's shared room, flipping on the light switch and glancing at the clock. It was only 8 p.m and you groaned slightly, you still had 3 hours until he came home. You pondered on what you would do to pass the time. Before you could think, your phone went off, startling you. "Hello?"

"Y/N," a memorable voice said.

"Minghao! What happened? How come you're calling from a different number?"

"My phone died so I asked to borrow Jihoon hyung's phone. I'm just calling to tell you that I should be done in about half an hour!"

"A half hour? It's only 8, how could you be nearly done already?"

"Well, I might've mentioned that today is our anniversary and the boys might've decided to let me go early." Minghao said, followed by a laugh.

"That's great!" You paused for a moment, lowering your voice slightly, "I'll be here waiting for you, baby." Whenever you talked like that to Minghao you knew would effect him and give him a slight hint at what's in store for tonight.

It must have worked because Minghao hummed, something he did when he was flustered or horny. "I can't wait."

With that, you hung up and began getting everything ready. You ran around the room, looking through drawers, putting things away, cleaning and making sure everything looked nice for when your boyfriend arrived.

...

As soon as you finished, you heard the front door shut, followed by a call of your name. You glanced in the mirror as you wore the new set of lingerie you bought for tonight, a shade of dark blue that Minghao just adored you in. You slowly walked down the stairs, seeing the latter taking off his shoes and stopping in his tracks once he noticed you.

"H-Holy shit," Minghao stuttered, taking in the way you looked—swallowing harshly. He suddenly felt a wave of blood rush down south and he chuckled shyly. "You look amazing, Y/N."

You smiled confidently, "Thank you baby. Now, why don't we go upstairs, and I tell you what my surprise is for you, hm?"

Minghao merely nodded innocently, following behind you like a puppy. At first, you were nervous that you wouldn't be able to get into the dominant headspace. But with how cute and excited Minghao seemed, it made it so much easier. You walked into the bedroom, where Minghao's eyes widened as he stared at your shared bed. On it was a collection of three different types of pretty collars you knew would look good on him.

You two have talked only once, maybe twice, about the things you liked. You expressed things you were into, and so did he. You never forgot that night—after a ton of drinks—when Minghao confessed the kinks of his submissive side. He slurred each word, that he's dreamt of being pegged by you, dominated by you, and collared. You remembered it clearly, despite your mind clouded by the alcohol, because of how much it turned you on to imagine Minghao being the putty in your hands with which you could do whatever you wanted to.

Minghao's mouth opened and closed slightly, clearly at a loss for words.

Smirking, you chose a collar that you noticed peaked his interest. It was a simple pink collar with the words "Baby" engraved on it. You grabbed it and looked at your boyfriend, noticing the bulge in his pants. "Excited?"

Minghao nodded aggressively as he looked up slightly so you could put the collar on. Minghao was more than excited. He could feel his heartbeat in his ears, his cock wouldn't stop twitching and—for the love of god—he couldn't wait to see what else you had in store for him.

"Strip for me," you said after the collar was secured around Minghao's neck. He obeyed and lifted his shirt, taking it off, quickly followed by his pants. You stopped him before he took off his boxers, "Let me." You sunk to your knees, holding eye contact with him as your fingertips lightly traced his hips. Minghao shuddered and his eyes closed slightly. You let your fingers slip under the band of his boxers and began pulling them down painfully slow.

After you were done with being a tease, his boxers were off and you took a moment to admire him. He's so pretty, you thought. You smiled and told him to lay on the bed as you said there was one more thing you needed to get. Minghao laid on the bed, resting on his elbows. "What are you doing!" You heard him shout from the room. He was more than excited—ecstatic, glad that you decided to surprise him—especially like this. His cock was already hard, slightly leaking a bit of precum.

You returned with a polaroid camera. He had a confused look on his face. "This," you paused, "is for me." Knowing Minghao as a photographer on the side gave you this idea. You knew he would be able to appreciate the human's naked body, not seeing it as something so lewd but as something beautiful. Minghao has taken pictures of you during sex before, and you couldn't lie, it turned you on knowing he most likely still has them saved somewhere in his phone. After he showed you the pictures, you actually began to see your body in a different, better light.

"Y-You're gonna take pictures, of me?" Minghao questioned curiously,

You giggled and instead of responding, you held the camera up to your eye and took a photo. A flash temporarily blinding Minghao, making him blink while blushing. "You're always taking pictures of art, and now, I'm gonna do the same." Smiling, you continued to capture Minghao from various angles. One was of his neck and collar, another of him looking at the camera a certain way that made your clit throb, one of his torso, another one of his red-tipped cock, and more. You took about seven pictures, not wanting to waste anymore time. "You ready for your next surprise?"

Minghao nodded, letting out a shuddering breath.

You smirked and put down the camera on the nightstand, near all of the rest of the pictures that was taken. You walked closer to him, climbing on top of him. Minghao's hands instinctively went to your waist and you captured his lips in a kiss. The kiss was soft, yet needy. Both of your tongues gliding against each other with heavy breathing and sloppy noises following suit. You felt his cock brush against your clothed core, making you and Minghao moan softly. Breaking the kiss, you began grinding yourself against his bare cock, loving how hard he was already. Your hands smoothed his chest while he watched your every move, eager to see what you would do next. Minghao gasped as your fingers toyed with his nipples, never knowing how sensitive they really were—nor how much it would turn him on. "You like that baby?"

Minghao swallowed a moan, nodding and pushing his head back into the sheets. "Y-Yes," he whispered.

You continued to grind against him as you leaned down to leave fresh hickeys onto the skin above the collar around his neck. "We're gonna try something new tonight baby." Minghao made a noise, impatiently waiting for you to continue. You stood up and took out a box you had under the bed, filled with the toys you two used on special occasions and whatnot. Minghao sat up and looked at you curiously. His hair was in disarray, his pupils blown notably and light purple hickeys began to develop—thanks to you. You dug through the box and took out a bottle of lube, along with one of the smaller dildos. Minghao's eyes nearly popped out of his head when he connected the dots and realized what was going to happen. "Lay on the bed," you ordered yet in a sweet voice.

Minghao shuffled around the bed and did what you told. You got on the bed in front of him, running your hand up and down his chest. His cock laid against his abdomen, the tip an angry red while his cheeks matched the color. "What are you gonna do to me?" He asked while shifting the pillows behind him so he could watch what you do to him.

With a chuckle, you opened the bottle of lube, slowly spreading it on two of your fingers. "I'm gonna prep you baby." You gripped his thigh, making him open his legs wider. Your middle finger traced around his hole, making him gasp at weird feeling. You shushed him, "I want you to relax for me honey, okay? It's gonna hurt for a bit, but it'll hurt worse if you're too tense."

Minghao took a deep breath, "I-Is there a safe word?"

You smiled at how wrecked he already sounded. "How about red?"

He nodded and told you to give him a moment. Minghao took a couple more deep breaths.

Between those breaths, you decided to help him by taking his length in your hand, making his breath hitch. You slowly stroked him, swiping your thumb across his tip. You used the lube that coated your fingers to slick his cock, hearing his muffled moans slightly. "That feel good, Hao?"

"Y-Yes," he said breathlessly, sounding so cute yet so hot.

You stopped momentarily, to coat your two fingers on your other hand with the lube and continued to stroke Minghao. You wanted to make sure that he would still be able to relax and enjoy both sensations. When you knew he would be fine, you put a few drops of lube on his hole, making him gasp once more.

"I-It's cold," he giggled.

You laughed slightly, "Alright baby, you ready?"

After Minghao silently nodded in response, you slowly inserted one of your fingers inside of him. He winced, trying to focus on the feeling of your hand wrapped around his cock rather than your finger inside of his ass. He had to admit, it did hurt, and feel weird, but he wanted this—and you. The whole situation was new and slightly strange for the both of you but Minghao adapted quickly.

After a couple of seconds, Minghao told you to move. You obliged and slowly began to thrust your finger in him. "You okay, baby?"

He breathed out heavily, "Y-Yeah."

You moved your finger inside of him at a set pace, making sure not to go too fast. "Ready for another?" Your thumb swiped the tip of his cock once more, making him moan before muttering a quiet yes. You added your other finger even slower than the first, nervous that Minghao would tell you to stop because it hurt. But after hearing the whine that tore out of his throat instead, threw those thoughts out the window and sent a wave of pleasure straight down to your core. "That feel good, Hao?"

"Y-Yes. P-Please, a little faster," he breathed out, swallowing a moan.

Smirking, you tightened your grip on his cock, slipping it in between your index and middle finger and stroking him. Minghao whined more, his moans only making your underwater damper. You were so ready to ruin him that it made your loins ache with heat. You looked up at Minghao, seeing his eyes screwed shut and his eyebrows furrowed together while his mouth hung open, releasing quiet breaths. His chest rose up and down, a thin layer of sweat covering it. You pushed your finger further in Minghao, curling ever so slightly. He cried out, grasping the sheets and biting his lip. "You're doing so good, baby." You breathed, stroking Minghao's cock faster.

Minghao gulped, "T-Thank you," he paused afterwards. "W-What should I call you?"

Your brain stuttered for a moment. You hadn't thought of Minghao calling you anything other than your name or a simple pet name. You racked your memories of names subs would call their doms.

Girls can be called master, right? Yeah, who cares? You're in charge. "Call me master, baby boy."

"T-Thank you mast- ah!" Minghao moaned when he felt your fingers curl in him once again and thumb swipe the tip of his cock. He was getting close, feeling all sorts of sensitive to the new feeling. Minghao would've never guessed he could get off with your fingers in him rather than the other way around, but boy could he get used to it.

Your hand continued to work on his cock, moving at the right paces that you knew would help bring him closer to the edge. Your fingers moved in and out of him, going deeper and curling at the right moments. You were a pro, Minghao thought. Of course you would be. You spent plenty of your years single and lonely, only having your fingers to satisfy your needs. He never knew fingers could feel so good..

When Minghao's moans began getting shorter and higher, you warned him. "You can only cum when I say so, if you want to you have to ask. Got it?"

"Y-Yes Master, can I cum?" He looked down at you with cute, innocent eyes.

You smirked, "Only good boys with manners can cum, baby. Hold it." Maybe you were being a bit harsh, but this new role brought out a different side of you that you didn't know you had.

Minghao tried to shuffle away from your hand and fingers, struggling to hold back his orgasm. He whines softly, his head thrown back and his eyes shut tight.

"If you keep moving baby, you won't cum at all." After that, you had pressed another finger inside of him gently and continuing to move in and out of him.

Minghao whined louder, "Please, please, Master, please let me cum." His head writhed against the pillows behind him, his eyebrows and eyes tight together.

Your eyes widened slightly, shocked at how desperate Minghao was. You felt him pulse around your fingers and you thrusted them inside of him faster. His whines were achingly loud, making your clit throb. "Cum for me, baby."

As soon as Minghao heard those words, he released the loudest moan, stilling completely and cum shooting out of his cock. His head pushed against the white pillows, his collared neck exposed as you watched his adam's apple bob. Minghao's mouth hung open, small gasps exiting his throat.

"Such a good boy for me, Hao. Aren't you?" You glanced at him, his eyes shut and chest falling up and down as he nodded slightly.

"Y-Yes, Master."

You hummed as you released your hold on his softening cock and wiped your fingers off. "We're not done yet, baby." Minghao swallowed, sitting up. His eyes were hooded, eyes darker and pupils dilated in a way that made you eager to wreck further. "On your hands and knees." You purred as you grabbed the dildo you had set on the bed before you two started. Minghao did as you asked, facing toward the headboard and waiting for your next command.

"I-I'm a little nervous," he confessed quietly.

You smiled at his honesty, resulting in you leaving a kiss of reassurance on his shoulder. "I'm right here, baby. If anything hurts too much or if you want to stop at any time, please just let me know, okay?"

Minghao looked back at you, biting his lip anxiously. "You wouldn't be mad?" He raised his eyebrows curiously.

You couldn't help but smile larger at his cuteness, "Of course I wouldn't honey. I would never pressure you into doing anything that you weren't comfortable with." Your heart swelled with love for Minghao as you opened the bottle of lube once more and began to spread it along the dildo.

"E-Even if," he trailed off, hesitant to say what he was planning to, "if, you were in the middle of fucking me?"

Your action stuttered for a split second, caught off guard by how innocent Minghao sounded saying something so explicit. "Y-Yes," you replied. "Even if I was fucking you, if you wanted to stop, I would. Just say the word, baby."

"Okay," was all he added before turning back to the headboard.

"Do you think you're ready for this, or do you want my fingers, baby?"

Minghao shuddered at the way you asked, feeling dirty about the whole situation. But he was ready for something just slightly bigger, and his cock twitched at the thought of you fucking him the way he's done to you countless times before. "I-I'm ready," he said.

"Are you sure?" You questioned when you noticed he seemed a little hesitant again.

"I'm sure, I promise."

You nodded silently as you took some more lube and spread it on Minghao's entrance, making him moan slightly. You pressed the dildo against him. It was a smooth light pink dildo that Minghao had gotten you months ago for your birthday, and what you almost forgot was that it doubled as a vibrator too. You looked at the bottom of the dildo, seeing the switches and modes of vibrations it had. You smirked as you eased it inside of him slowly.

Minghao winced, "I-It feels w-weird." Minghao closed his eyes, trying to relax somewhat.

Before you were going to say anything, you let the dildo slip inside of him until the hilt stopped you. "How are you doing?"

"Mm, I'm okay, give me a second." He breathed in and out of his nose, before a moan choked out of his throat.

You had switched the toy on, starting at the lowest setting. You wanted Minghao to feel good and help him ease up. "This should make things feel a little bit better." You ran your hand down his back, gripping his ass.

Minghao moaned aloud again as he bucked his hips forward. "A-ah, i-it feels, s-so good."

You tugged on Minghao's collar, making him choke slightly as you pulled him upwards to kiss him. Minghao held the side of your face with his hand, his head strained towards you as your tongues mingled together. You bit the bottom of his lip, earning a moan from him and making you smirk in return. Your hand snaked down his body, gripping his cock. "M-Master," he breathed, gasping as he felt your thumb swipe across his slit.

"Yes, baby?" You teased, stroking him slowly.

He bit back another moan, "P-Please, m-move it."

"You want me to move the toy in you, baby boy?"

Minghao whined at the pet name, nodding his head shyly. "Please, Master."

You smiled at how obedient he was. You obliged and gripped the base of the buzzing dildo. Slowly, you began to move it out of Minghao and easing it back in. You heard him let out a long, drawn out moan. "Like that?" You questioned, seeing him move his hands and lay on his forearms.

"F-Faster," he rasped. His breathing was heavy, shallow as he gripped the sheets from pleasure of the vibrations inside him.

Doing as he told, you began to thrust the toy inside of him a bit faster. Hearing his moans was making your pussy ache even more, knowing for sure there would be a dark, wet spot on your underwear. Your clit developed its own heartbeat, only beating harder after each moan that slipped out of Minghao's pretty lips. You thought of those lips around your clit, biting back a moan. You wanted this to go faster, faster so that Minghao would cum, then make you cum.

You added a bit more lube to the exposed part of the dildo, pushing it back inside him. You moved the toy quicker, hearing Minghao whine each time the base hit against him. "Fuck, that f-feels so good, Master. P-Please, don't stop." Your finger flipped the switch to the second setting, the vibrator buzzing faster and a bit harsher.

Minghao let out a surprised cry, scratching at the sheets. He let out broken moans, one following after another.

"You close again, baby?" You grabbed the toy and began fucking him even faster, making him moan louder.

"Y-Yes.." he whispered, his face laying against the pillow while his ass was up in the air for you.

"Remember what I told you." You merely said, relentlessly thrusting the vibrator deep inside of him.

"Please! Please, please Master! Can I cum? I-I'm so, close." He begged, looking back at you on his hands with his eyes slightly glossed over while his cheeks developed a dark pink hue.

Minghao's hair was tussled, his bangs covering his eyes, along with his flushed face, you couldn't resist. "Go ahead."

He came with a loud, drawn moan, bordering a scream. His body twitched as he stilled and fall back onto the pillow under him. The room was silent minus Minghao's heavy breaths and the buzzing of the vibrator still inside of him. You turned the toy off, slowly pulling it out of him. Minghao gasped at the friction and sighed when it was out. You cleaned up most of the cum that had landed on the sheets under him, not wanting him, or yourself, to lay in it.

"You okay, baby boy?" Rubbing his back, you shifted next to him to look at his face, making sure you didn't hurt him.

He quietly nodded, "I'm perfect," he said.

You moved closer to him, capturing him in a slow, sensual kiss. He moaned into the kiss as your tongue glided over his. You pulled away slowly, "You've been very good for me, Hao." You got up from the bed, rummaging through the box again and taking out something that was out of Minghao's view.

"Mhm?" He said, waiting for you to continue. You turned to face him again and he visibly and audibly swallowed. "You said that you've wanted me to fuck you before, right?"

Minghao was speechless, mouth opening and closing, unable to form words. You wore a strap-on that you had bought weeks ago in preparation for tonight, and you couldn't wait to see his reaction—which frankly is better than you could've imagined.

Minghao's cock twitched as he recalls the night he confessed that to you. Just a moment ago with the dildo was incredible but having his own girlfriend fuck him? He could feel another orgasm coming already. He nodded his head once he got out of his thoughts, eager for you to be inside of him.

"You're gonna be good for me, right baby?" You said getting back on the bed and positioning yourself in front of him. He nodded as you grabbed a pillow for him to lay on top of. "Good. And I hope you know I'm just as excited for this as you are."

Minghao's face began to blush whilst his ears did the same, a cute habit that you always adored about him. "R-Really?"

You nodded as you spread the lube along your strap. Minghao gulped, letting out a whine. "H-Hurry, p-please. I-I want you, in me already." He said, voice lowering to a whisper as he confessed his needs.

Holding back a moan, you looked at him with a lustful stare. "Desperate for me to fuck you, aren't you baby?"

Minghao moaned at your words, feeling his cock twitch. "Mhm," he hummed.

You did as he so cutely said and gripped his thighs, slowly easing yourself into him. He winced slightly as you watched his face intently, keeping an eye out for any uncomfortable expressions. Neither of you could believe this was happening. Out of both of your comfort zone's yet still feeling somehow natural.

"You okay?" You asked as your strap filled him up to the hilt.

He nodded, his eyes shut. "You can move," Minghao said timidly.

"Are you sure baby?" You were afraid you would hurt him or get too caught up in the moment and hurt him.

"Please, Master, fuck me." Was all he said, his words and voice sending a strong pulse to your clit. Everything that you thought before those words left Minghao's mouth, were long gone. You clenched onto his thighs and began doing as he told you to.

Slapping noises filled the room, along with Minghao's moans with each thrust inside him. You kept your eyes on his, seeing every detail and feature that appeared on his face. "Such a dirty boy for me, aren't you, Hao?"

Minghao threw his head back, letting out a high pitched whine, "Y-Yes, Master. O-Only for you." He said, his mouth gaping open.

It was strange to be on the receiving end of what would usually come out of your mouth when Minghao would fuck you the way you are to him. It was strange, but it gave you a whole new sense and feel of power that left you craving more.

Your hips snapped against his as you took one of your hands and grabbed his length—which was leaking profusely onto his stomach—and began to jerk him off while you fucked him. Minghao's face contorted in a state of pleasure you had never seen him in. He gripped the sheets so hard, you could see the whites of his knuckles. "Such a good boy for me, baby."

Minghao moaned at your words, biting his lip. He was so hard and so turned on and so close to cumming again, it embarrassed him. His hand wrapped around your wrist, stopping your movements. "P-Please," he gasped. 

"Please what, baby?" You asked, slowing down your hips slightly.

"Just, f-fuck me, please." He stuttered, swallowing dryly and letting out a broken moan.

You smirked, "Remember who's in charge here, baby boy." And without saying anything else, you bucked your hips faster. "Like that, baby?"

"Yes, please. H-Harder." Minghao grabbed one of your hands that was on his hip and intertwined your fingers together. 

You smiled, contradicting what you were doing to Minghao at the moment. "You're so cute baby, am I fucking you good?"

He panted, eyes squeezing shut. "Yes! You're fucking me s-so good Master, p-please don't stop. I-I'm close."

You let go of Minghao's hand to move your position. You knew that there was a certain spot in you Minghao would hit when he moved your legs over his shoulders--so that's what you did. You moved his legs onto your shoulders and shifted your position, hopefully hitting inside Minghao deeper.

Minghao yelled, "R-Right there! F-Fuck, I-I'm gonna cum-" Minghao grabbed your arm, gripping it tightly as he shoved his head into the pillow. His hips twitched and he felt his eyes roll to the back of his head. Cum shot out of his cock and onto his stomach, also splashing onto his collar. He let out a whine, developing into a moan that broke as his voice got higher. Minghao collapsed slightly, letting out a huff of breath.

You laughed slightly, seeing him worn out and sweaty, not even caring that he came without your permission. His hair stuck to his forehead, tiny droplets falling onto his cheeks while a layer of sweat covered his bare torso. You slowly pulled out of Minghao, making him wince. You tossed it onto the floor and stood up to make a trip to the bathroom to get a wash rag to clean Minghao up.

When you returned, you took a second to admire him. You quietly grabbed the camera off the bedside table and took a quick photo. Minghao seen the flash and felt your presence and turned to you. He giggled, "That was, probably the best anniversary gift you've ever given me." He said, out of breath.

You chuckled as you approached him, cleaning off the semi dried cum on his stomach. "I'm glad that it didn't go south."

Minghao hummed, "You didn't cum though." He mentioned, taking off his collar and rubbing his neck slightly.

You waved a hand at him, signaling that you didn't mind. "You can make it up to me on our next anniversary."

He smirked, and grabbed your hand, pulling you on top of him. "I'll make sure you can't walk for weeks, baby girl."

--

a/n: wow i finally posted! hope u guys enjoyed this, i know i did ;)

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #403

“ashes to ashes, watch me disappear”

If given the opportunity, would you like to star in a musical? Definitely not. I don't like musicals. Name one person you’d take a bullet for: There's honestly a lot, but Mom immediately came to mind. Any posters of a band on your bedroom wall? Yeah: Metallica and Marilyn Manson currently. I want lots more, especially an Ozzy one. Do you think you’ve already met your soulmate? I don't believe in soulmates. Do you share your bedroom with anyone? No, unless you include my cat and snake. Is your favorite color yellow? No, it's actually one of my least favorites. Were you born in a hospital? I was. Do you know the name of the person that delivered you? No, but Mom does. I think he delivered me and my two sisters, and I know Mom has seen him since for other reasons. Was your birth recorded? God no. Good call, Mom. Did you eat a peach this week? Would you believe me if I told you I had a small bit of peach pie for my sister's birthday? For some reason, I just really wanted to try some. It was okay, but the aftertaste sucked. Are you leaving the house tomorrow? Yes, for TMS therapy. Every weekday. Do you enjoy romantic movies, even when they’re cliche? I honestly do. If you could get free vocal lessons would you take them? Probably not. I don't like singing in front of anyone, and it's not like I wanna get anywhere with my singing, so. Is your mother diabetic? She is. Are you? No. Ever sang someone to sleep? No. Who do you stalk the most through Facebook? Nobody. Have you ever deleted your Facebook, then brought it back? No. What is your main responsibility each day? Be sure to take my medications. Do you feel like you fulfill those responsibilities? Yeah. There are rare mornings where I forget, but I almost always remember. I don't fw skipping out on meds that keep my mental health stable. When was the last time you used spray paint? Good question. Do you know the middle name of the last person you kissed? Yep. Who is the friendliest person you know? My mom, probably. Something that annoys you about summer: THE HEAT. THE HUMIDITY. UGH. Something that annoys you about winter: Hm. That's hard to say, given I love winter. I guess the fact it doesn't snow enough here. Are the doors of your fridge side by side or on top of one another? Side-by-side. If you’ve moved out of the house you were born in, do you know the people who live in that house now? Nope. Have you ever cried in a movie theater? Not sobbed or anything, but I've definitely teared up and gotten the sniffles because of multiple movies. Do you read comic books? No. Do you force your way into conversations in which you are not involved? No. Have you ever seriously pretended to be clinically insane? I didn't need to pretend; I'm pretty damn sure I was for a while. Might I add that it's EXTREMELY inconsiderate to pretend you're insane, btw. Insanity is not "cool." It's not "funny." It's not "edgy." It's a serious, confusing, heart-wrenching issue that can ruin lives. Do you know anyone with a stutter? Yes, myself included when I'm even mildly nervous. And sometimes just randomly. With a lisp? I don't believe so. What was the last board game you played? The Disney version of "Pretty Pretty Princess" w/ my niece and even my nephew, even though his sexist-ass dad didn't want him to. Like let your kid have some fun with his sister and aunt, goddamn. They had a blast. It was Aubree's birthday present from me, so I am SO glad she loved it. Did you win? Ha ha, no, I always let Aubree or Ryder win. I came super close once, but I let the kids bend the rules a bit. They don't like losing, and even though they definitely need to understand that just happens and is totally fine for it to, I wasn't about to be the one to make them sad about it. When was the last time you tried to speak with an accent? OH MY LAAAAAWWWWWWD. Also at Aubree's b-day party, at one point, I spoke in a snobbish British accent while I was winning at the aforementioned game. Ryder asked, "Why are you speaking Spanish?", and I fuckin DIED. Have you ever made up a word before? Yeah, I know at least a few instances for fantasy animals in writing. When was the last time you went to a museum? A couple summers ago when my brother and his son visited, we went to a science museum. My nephew was sooooo into it. Do you have a nice yard? If so, do you spend a lot of time outside in it? If not, where do you go when you want to relax outdoors on nice days? Our front and back yards are both small and honestly very boring. The grass is a pretty green, but that's the only nice thing about it. I don't go to sit outside here on any day. Do your parents enjoy any of the things that you enjoy? Do you bond over these things? My parents and I have very similar music tastes, so there's that. I also didn't know for the longest time that Mom likes to write, which I sure as hell do, too! She doesn't really write anymore though, and she's self-conscious of it anyway, like I am. She and I also love a lot of the same shows. What is the movie that you have waited the longest for/which film do you remember anticipating the most/are still anticipating? I think The Incredibles 2. I aaaalways wanted to know what happened after the end of the first film. Do you have any ideas for a story or movie you’re planning to write or you’d write if you had the time/had the talent? Please share a synopsis! I genuinely think some RP I've written is series-worthy, but I don't feel like re-writing the YEARS of RP into a book format, and I sincerely worry that the ridiculously dark parts could inspire people like serial killers and cause A LOT of controversy, crime-blaming, and just general hate. I don't want to be involved in that. What is something that an interested guy/girl could comment about you, that would make you instantly open to them (e.g., “That book you’re reading is from my favorite author”)? Compliment my Markiplier tattoo, obviously knowing it's a tribute to him, and we're essentially besties. Is there a person in your life (maybe barely) that you feel in constant competition with (even just in your imagination)? Maybe you feel they are consistently outshining you? Ugh... there's a local photographer that's much more successful than I am that I admittedly am very envious of. I swear to whatever god you may believe in that I mean it from a modest perspective, I really, really do, but I genuinely think my skills surpasses hers, and she's only more prevalent because photography REALLY is about who you know. She's talented, yes, but like... come on. If you are single, even if you are normally happily single, are there certain specific things you witness that make you wish you were in a relationship (e.g., people getting engaged)? I mean yeah. I miss cuddling, holding hands, kissing, just being cute together, and especially people getting engaged or having kids. It's such a trigger to me. Once upon a time, that's all I wanted with Jason. I wanted to be that beautiful couple that got married and had two or three loved-beyond-words children, but then he left so abruptly, and I feel like it was so brutally robbed from me. I don't want kids anymore like at all, but the point still stands that I felt like my dreams were just ripped away. Out of all your usernames for websites, which one is your favorite? Do you use it for more than one site? I use "Ozzkat" just about everywhere. Have you ever spent the whole day (or multiple days) just looking up one thing on the internet (e.g., videos of your favorite band, how-to videos, quizzes, etc.)? OHHHHHHHHHH YEAH. There have been a couple days or so where I was totally glued to looking up various tattoo designs, bingeing let's plays or conspiracy theory videos, etc. etc. If you ever think about getting married, what are some aspects of the wedding that you would like to see in a non-traditional manner (e.g., a different color dress or “partners” over “husband” and “wife”)? I WILL NOT get married in a church, first of all. I'm also not having the traditional vows, and I probably won't wear a white dress, but instead black. Salt & vinegar, barbecue, sour cream & onion, or cheddar? Ohhhh, I like all those options but barbecue. I think I've gotta go with sour cream & onion, though. Bow ties on guys, dorky or adorable? A D O R A B L E ! ! ! I think they're ordinarily geeky, but I mean, geeky is cute in my world. :^) Do you believe in demonic possession? How about ghosts? Angels? Angels, no. Spirits/ghosts, 100%. I don't exactly believe in demons, per se, but I do question if evil spirits can possess someone. What is one romantic movie that you enjoy enough to watch more than once? I've seen The Notebook numerous times. Name three countries you want to visit; why those three? South Africa to interact with meerkats at the KMP, somewhere up in Canada to see the Northern Lights, and Germany just because, really. I took German for four semesters, and the culture and all just interests me. Do you have a good luck charm? No, considering I don't believe they do jack. Do you use Skype to talk to your friends? Only Sara. Now that I have Discord semi-figured out now though, we'll probably use that for voice chatting. Are you allergic to any animals? I might be allergic to dogs. Do you usually spend your weekends out, or at home? I'm like... always at home. Do you think it’s wrong for people to say "retard/retarded" as an insult? Absofuckinglutely. Don't pull that shit when I'm around. Have you ever had to go to the police department? No. Have you ever lived through a hurricane? Plenty. Have you ever had a home-grown tomato? Yes, from my old friend's garden. We'd have delicious tomato, mayo, and bacon sandwiches. The only instance where I've enjoyed tomatoes. Have you ever held a real gun? The former friend I mentioned just before, her husband always carried a gun, and he just needed me to hold it for a sec for some reason I don't recall. I hated the feeling. Would you rather wear Converse or Vans? I like both, but I think I prefer Converse. Have you ever been called bipolar? Yes, because I clinically am. Have you ever made fun of a handicapped person? FUCK no. And like the "retarded" thing, don't you fucking DARE to do this in front of me. I WILL deck the shit out of you. Do you think it’s okay to have sex before marriage? Sure, as long as you're being safe and are very thorough in communication. Do you like to watch old sitcoms? I don't really watch TV as I say in like every survey it seems, but I do enjoy some old sitcoms I grew up watching with my mom, like The Nanny, The Golden Girls, The Munsters, etc. If asked, could you run a mile nonstop right now? Being completely serious, I don't even know if I CAN physically run right now. My legs are so incredibly weak, and I'm humiliatingly close to what my heaviest weight was back in 2016, so I can almost guarantee my knees would crumple if I tried. Do you wear those rubber wristbands? I used to. I don't really like bracelets nowadays. If a necklace/ring gives you green marks, do you still wear it? Nope. Have you ever driven an electric car? No. When was the last time you saw someone you went to high school with? Uhhhh idk. What breed was the last dog you saw? A fucking GOLIATH of a lab. I shit you not when I say my sister's roommate's dog Hudson is the size of a goddamn bear. How long have your parents been together (or how long were they together, if they no longer are): I wanna say they were together at the very least 20 years. What has been your most epic cooking failure? I once accidentally put something (I don't remember what) in the microwave for around 45 minutes I believe, and I walked away and completely forgot about it. I remembered a long while later, and safe to say, it wasn't edible, whatever it was, lmao. Have you ever been to Mexico? No. Have you ever had a parrot sit on your shoulder? No, but that'd be cool. Has anyone in your life ever treated you abusively? No. How long has it been since your last breakup? Somewhere around two years ago? My memory is so garbage nowadays. Can you concentrate well while listening to music, or do you find it distracting? It's distracting, usually. What’s something you’ve been struggling with lately? I've been pretty bad about drinking too much soda lately. :/

[emperorsfoot]

So, in case you missed the two tiny ship posts I made about it, my father died yesterday. 

(Thank you for your sympathy. That’s very kind, but I don’t want your condolences.)

My feelings about my father are complicated. 

He was not a bad father. He never mistreated me or my sister. 

But he was also just sort of... not... there...

Back when my parents were married, my father’s job made him travel a lot. So he was rarely almost ever home. When he did come home, he would bring back all kinds of toys, and clothing, and gifts for my sister and I and at the time that was really cool. (Looking back as an adult, I realize this was him trying to buy our love.)

He also used these business trips to cheat on my mom. (I did not find that out until years later.) 

After he left that job he was home a lot more and one would think that’d be great. But now that he was home, all he did was fight with my mom. Loudly. A lot. He never physically hurt her. Once again, my father never actually mistreated any of us. He was just never there during my formative years, then always argued with my mother -very loudly, and with slurs- and didn’t bother with censoring himself around my sister and I. 

I found out he hadn’t “left” his job, but was “fired”. And had not found a new job to replace it. 

I found this out when cops showed up at our house telling us we no longer lived there. Apparently, my father had stopped paying the mortgage and the bank repossessed our house. (I was the one who answered the door, BTW. It was terrifying for an eleven-year-old.)

Needless to say, after that my parents marital problems got worse. 

My sister moved in with her best friend’s family for the latter half of her senior year, then into the dorms at her collage. She was taken care of in terms of housing. 

My parens and I bounced around a couple different hotel rooms before we found an affordable apartment. (Yes, I was homeless for a couple months between 5th grade and 6th grade.) We were in one apartment for three years. It was not rent controlled and when my parents became unable to afford the increased rent costs we were hard pressed to move again. 

By the time we got to the second apartment, my parents were so done with each other that they weren’t even sleeping in the same room together. My father had his own room, and my mother bunked with me. 

This lasted for a few years until one day when I was seventeen, they were having one of their many, many, many fights in the kitchen and I wanted a snack but their argument was in my way. So I just up and snarled at them to get a divorce already! Why were they even staying together? Not “for the children”. My sister had been living on her own for six years now and didn’t need them. I was certainly getting no benefit from them cohabitation with me. So why were they even bothering?

So, they finally got divorced. 

My mother and I kept the apartment and my father moved out. 

I did not see or hear from him for several years. 

He sent me a birthday card once. He got a date right, but forgot my age. After that, I would get random phone calls asking me about my life, or just my day at odd times (usually while I was at work and coulee not answer). He was trying to form a connection of some kind. He was just going about it badly. 

Finally, he decided to transition from “unemployed” to “retired”, and asked me to help him move. 

He had been living somewhere down near San Diego at the time (it’s cheaper than LA, I have lived in LA my whole life) and wanted to move out of state to some place with a lower cost of living. Before contacting me, he sent out to realtors all over the country for listing packets (or whatever) and there was this one realtor who included her photo on her business card. She was in her late thirties, blond, and showing some shoulder. So my father decided she was gonna be his realtor. 

I don’t know why I agreed to go with him, but I did. We piled into his car and went on a road trip to a place called Hickman Country, Tennessee. 

The trip was four days off cheap motels, bad food, and misadventures that eventually became hilarious stories I brought back to my friends. 

Finally, we get to Hickman Country and meet the realtor he thought was pretty enough to drive 2000 mils to meet. 

Turns out, that picture was 20 years old. The realtor was almost sixty, ...and dying of cancer. Joy.

We were instead helped by another realtor who was splitting her commissions with the first one. 

This was also happening either a year after, or only a couple of months after those huge floods that devastated Nashville and the surrounding area back in 2010. (Hickman County is about an hour [depending on speed limits] south of Nashville, and was hit just as hard by the floods.) Every house we were shown was dirt-cheap and super affordable (the same acreage in LA would have been in the billions, these houses barely broke the hundred-thousands), but was also covered in a layer of fresh damp mold. Sometimes the line on the wall was well above my head indicating that this house was almost completely submerged under water. 

I didn’t want my father to buy any of these. 

But, he drove all this way and already liquified all his assets. He was not going back to LA. He was determined to buy a house here. So, we expanded the search area a little and the realtor showed him a little nothing of a town called “Cable Unincorporated” (if you look it up, you will find it on the map, but back then is was not even on the map). Coble was located within the borders of Hickman County, but not legally considered part of it, hence the use of “Unincorporated” into the name. 

The “two square” consisted of a church on one side, and a restaurant/general store/gas station on the other side. If you were on the road just passing through Coble, you wouldn’t even realize it was a town. You’d think it was an abandoned gas station. But, you wouldn’t be passing it on the road anyway because it was so far out of the way, even if you got lost, you wouldn’t even stumble upon it by accident. You had to be looking for Coble in order to find it. 

But, it was above the flood plane, and so all of the houses were dry. 

My father bought 11 acres of land with a 2-bedroom house on it for 35k. Eleven acres and a livable dwelling for $35,000. Do you understand that!?

I’m now gonna skip over a few years to 2018 when he had his stoke.

Remember how I said Coble was “out of the way”? 

Well, in January of 2018, my father had a stroke. His closest neighbor was the one who found him. We don’t know how long after the stoke it was. She just said she saw him laying on the floor and called 911. 

Even with a helicopter, it took 3 hours to get him to anything resembling a hospital. 

Thing about that for a second. 

Air lift helicopter. 

Three hours to get to a hospital. 

That’s how far out of the way, and in the middle of nowhere he chose to live. 

Anyway, after the stroke he could not go back to living alone. So, my sister and I flew out there to try and figure things out. It was too expensive to bring him back to California with us. Even if we pooled our resources we would not have been able to pay for his care. So, he had to stay in Tennessee. We found a home that was affordable and had an opening and we arranged for him to live there. This one was in a real town with a deal hospital. 

He fought us at every step of the way. 

He wanted to go back to his house in the middle of “in the middle of nowhere”, and die there. 

In retrospect, we should have just let him do that. My sister and I spent the net two years slowly being dragged down in debt paying for his care. 

Yeah, I said Tennessee was “more affordable” but being “more affordable” does not mean that it was actually “affordable”. And, because he owned that absurdly large piece of land, it disqualified him for any kind of state assistance. 

We tried to sell the property, but -amazingly- no one wants to buy large tracks of land in an area that’s so out of the way it might as well be a mythical fae land only accessible through a mushroom ring. 

Anyway, that was two years ago. It’s April 2020.

He’s finally dead now. 

My sister and I are both in debt so deep we’ll never be able to pull ourselves out of it. 

And there’s a global pandemic going on so I can’t even collect his ashes. 

So, that’s the deal with me and my father. 

[sarakuper]

Cali; the salsa capital

Stop #10, February 11-17

We landed in Cali late Tuesday night and got to our hostel, The Pelican Larry. Our “private bedroom” was awkwardly filled with one queen bed and two sets of bunk beds… and a bunch of skeeters!

Wednesday we walked around, ate a delish vegetarian lunch, and attempted to go to the river to cool down. After traveling about 45 minutes by bus, we waited for next one we needed to take, but it never showed. There’s a chance this bus only ran on Saturday’s but honestly we weren’t too sure. It was already 4pm by the time we decided to turn around, since we were warned to leave the river by 5 for safety. Even though our plans for the day totally failed, I still thought the bus system here is actually pretty impressive. 

Back at the hostel other travelers, including 3 German girls traveling on their gap year, invited us to visit Cristo Rey to watch the sunset. We ended up being a group of 8, taking two cabs to get there. We enjoyed the views and the sunset, then Sean, myself and two others went for a vegan dinner in town that was cheap and yummy. 

That night several of us played games at the hostel around a big table and eventually got ready to go out for salsa. We went to La Topa Tolondra, a famous salsa club. I thought I knew some salsa from when I traveled in Peru but Cali salsa is so different!!! I knew almost nothing of the dance moves. Cali is known for salsa and their nightlife so even though Sean and I are early birds, I did my best to embrace this. Sean wasn’t thrilled to go out, especially for salsa, but he came for me. 

The next day we slept in late missing the free (and basic) breakfast by the hostel. I spent all day working on some applications for jobs while Sean did Duolingo for hours. I didn’t know it until later but he was very determined to exceed my XP. Only duolingo-ers will understand that reference (Sue gets it)! The rest of the day was spent working on extending our travel visa and participating in an interview to volunteer at the spanish school we went to when we first arrived in Colombia. In the evening I joined the free intro to Cali Salsa dance class offered by the hostel. It was actually pretty fun, and a nice way to meet other travels too. And after learning all the basic steps, of course I wanted to go ahead and practice what I learned! 

Later that night many of us went out again, and since I felt safe to go with this group of people Sean stayed back since it was not interesting to him. The salsa bar we went to this night was called Tintindeo and was so much fun! I enjoyed it much more than the other salsa club because it felt more like a bar you could hang out in and also dance salsa with a lot less intimidation. The salsa club from the previous night was slightly awkward in that you were either dancing salsa or awkwardly watching along the side lines. Tintindeo has fun lights, and all of the salsa teachers were there (probably to encourage people to purchase private salsa lessons with them) and they were amazing to dance with! Of course they know you are learning, but some are better than others in leading and two of the teachers in particular made me feel like I knew what the hell I was doing!! By the end of the night I was super sweaty; I knew I had tried my best! 

Around 1 am the bar came to a close and the group I was with wanted to head to a raggaeton club nearby. Since it was considerably early I went along, but when I got there I felt like it was sketchy and the best of the night was behind us. I’ve learned that usually “the next place” is never as good as the first when the first one was a blast. So why stay out? I decided to leave, and so a friend put me in a cab to assure I’d get back safe. During the ride I followed the blue dot on my phone on google maps to ensure the driver was taking me to the right place. All was good, and even though Sean locked me out of the room on accident, the 24 hour host was able to let me in. 

There had been a lot of talk about ELN, a guerrilla group still remaining in Colombia, engaging in a violent protest from Friday - Sunday, February 14-16. Talk was that the cities were safe, but the small towns outside the city were not. We heard of tourists being told not to take busses between cities for their own safety. Afraid of this threat, we decided to extend our initial 3 day visit to Cali into a 6 day visit. We changed hostels on Friday and stayed until Monday morning, when it was reportedly safe to travel again.

This next hostel, Green House, was very quiet and relaxed. There were only 3 other tourists staying, 2 of them being Israeli’s on their gap year after the army. I love meeting Israeli’s because I feel like I have so much to talk about with them; being jewish, my family in Israel, and having visited the country many times. Usually when I travel to Central or South AmericaI meet many Israeli’s, but being there for 2 months at this point, these two were the first ones we met! 

After attempting to cook some version of the delicious lentil patties we’ve been eating (total fail btw) we got ready to go out to experience another club, this time not for Salsa. After reading a lot about Cali I understand now that their nightlife really is the main attraction of visiting Cali, and so this would be my 3rd night in a row going out! Sean was being a trooper and coming along with me. I had hoped the lack of salsa would make it more interesting for him. 

I had a few drinks with the Israeli’s while we talked a bunch. Sean didn’t feel like joining the conversation even though I tried to include him time and time again, as did the two Israeli’s, he didn’t budge. Sometimes it’s hard because I absolutely love socializing (when I actually like the people), and traveling as a couple makes it slightly harder to socialize than when I had traveled alone in the past. Anyway, Sean and I eventually went out to La Pergola which had a $20.000 cover (about $6). Even though this is quite expensive, we weren’t buying drinks there and were really going for the experience. As we approached the club in our cab we could hear the music from down the street. There was a long line to get in that moved surprisingly quickly. The club was huge and completely open having great views of the surrounding city. There were 3 floors playing different types of music, and really was a sight to see. It was especially fun when a very popular latin song came on and everyone in the club sang it together. We stayed until 1am before hopping into a cab back to the hostel.

The rest of the weekend, we spent our time just hanging out trying to avoid the serious heat of this place. By 1pm it gets so hot, all you can think about is swimming. By 2pm we left for a cab to Acuaparque de la Cana to spend the late afternoon in a children/family water park. We felt like teenagers having fun on all the watersides, walking around in our swim suits, eagerly checking out the next fun thing to do. One of Sean’s favorite was the zip line where you hung (together) on a bar that zip lines above a pool. You have to let go before it reaches the end plopping you right into the water! We did this one several times throughout the day. 

We did other rides as well including a high and long waterslide. Sean and I went on a slide, side by side, and my slide gave me a huge wedgie just before it shot me into the pool. Sean loved that one too, but I could not handle that level of discomfort again and so I chose to pass on repeating it. Another fun one was the toilet bowl (or at least that’s what we called it when we visited waterparks at camp)! We rented a two person tube that shot us through a tube spitting you out into a “bowl” that you flung around and around until you made it to the bottom. That one was super fun :) The last ride of the day for us was the wave pool, since it was 5pm and everything else was closing. It was fun and enjoyable until Sean realized how dirty the pool was and how much hair was in the water (LOL). 

Our last day in Cali we waited for the heat to pass before heading out for a bite and some walking around. We walked through the [very strange] cat statues, as well as a lovely park for people watching. Our time in Cali was fun, but now it’s time to leave (hopefully to somewhere less hot)!

Thanks for reading fam, love you all.