#the second people started attacking jkr for little shit

[vaguelyaperson]

"JKR was always terrible!" "HP ((a series written in the late 90s and early 2000s)) was always problematic ((by today's standards))!" "JKR was always secretly a racist misogynist!"

JKR is a very real example of how even a progressive ally can fail to check biases and instead be brainwashed by bigotry. More than that, JKR is a tragic example of what idolizing someone as an unfalliable progressive icon can do to someone when they (inevitably) get high on their platform and do something problematic ((the shoehorned gay Dumbledore controversy being the start, imo.))

By hooting and hollering about how she was secretly horrible all along (when she used tropes that were extremely prevalent in early 2000s media), you are distancing yourselves and believing yourselves imperviable to the same fate. That is a major mistake.

Everyone, no matter how progressive they start out, is capable of fucking up and/or getting brainwashed by propaganda. Everyone has unintentional biases they have to unlearn - failing to do so, to their own detriment.

JKR should be a cautionary tale. Not a gotcha! We unmasked you as evil all along!

The fact that so many people miss the point of this makes me very worried about the current strength and direction of progressive social movements.

EDIT: Anyone using this argument to support Hogwarts Legacy or any of JKR's current bullshit will get blocked. This is intended as a learning point that this sort of thing doesn't happen again. I fully support the boycott.

[litsetaure]

I need to talk about this scene. Initially, I thought that Gellert just slipped up and blew his cover; he got caught up in what was happening that he forgot himself. You can almost sense it; the Aurors are thinking ‘wait, what?’ Mind you, if this is the point where the MACUSA (and, for that matter, Newt) realised that something was not right, I have some serious questions about what exactly actual Percival Graves was like! It really does say a lot about Graves that the first time they realized that Graves probably wasn't Graves until that speech that basically overturns what they thought he believed on the Statute of Secrecy. Not to mention that sentencing Newt and Tina to that creepy as fuck death penalty didn’t raise any alarms at all!

But then, I thought about the context. If I recall rightly, this scene is directly after Credence has apparently been killed. Obviously, come the second film, we know that’s not true, but as yet, no one else does. And I started to wonder - did Gellert actually slip up? Or did he intend to reveal himself? Had he just had enough and decided to tell ‘his’ colleagues the truth?

I mean, if you listen to him speaking - initially, he doesn’t really sound just angry. Maybe a little bit, but to me, he sounds more sad and frustrated. Especially at the start with the line ‘Madam President…I ask all of you. Who does this law protect?’ It might be his accent, but to me, he sounds like he’s on the verge of tears. His cause is something very important to him and he just witnessed what he thought was a murder of a boy who had a condition that was in no way his own fault. And that would strike a chord within him. Because he’s seen it before with Ariana Dumbledore. A young person suffering from a condition that was in no way her fault, but which kept her trapped and hidden away because of a law that would see her taken and locked away by a draconian Ministry, under the guise of keeping the wizarding community safe and secret.

And it frustrates and hurts Gellert. He doesn’t blow his cover here because he got sloppy. He effectively revealed himself, because he’s had enough of hiding. He wants these people to understand what’s at stake. To see that the law they value so much is only hurting them and others like them. And why is it their obligation to hide? They’re not shameful. They’ve done nothing wrong. Are they really to be condemned to live in secret and fear because of something they can’t control and to protect people who lash out at what they don’t understand?

Yeah. He’s not really angry, or not just angry. He’s just done. Done with all of this bullshit. He knows the damage the statute can do. It denied Percival Dumbledore the right to tell his side of the story (out of fear for his daughter) and ripped him away from the family who needed him. It destroyed Albus’ chance for a future. It also ultimately cost Kendra and Ariana their lives.

And even if he hasn’t initially given away enough to tell everyone who he is, he’s told enough to make it clear which side he’s on. He’s not stupid. He had to know that some people there may have suspected who he was, or at the very least a follower of Gellert’s, and he just turns his back on them after that speech that basically confirms which side of this conflict he's on, if nothing else. And he just turns his back and walks away (in disgust), like it's no big thing. Like there aren't AT LEAST 30 Aurors and President Picquery at his back, and also Newt Scamander and his trunk full of creatures (and Dumbledore's man). That is one hell of a bold power move. He’s saying ‘I know what I’m revealing to you here and I don’t give a shit what you think. I’m done hiding away. I’m not going to tolerate this law that condemns and harms us. I’m going to fight it with everything I have. If you want to attack me and fight me, that’s fine. I’m up for it. I’m not giving up. Do your worst.’

Also, if you watch the fight, it’s pretty typical of what we know of Gellert in a fight. He’s got virtually the entire MACUSA ready to take him down (and he also does not look remotely worried by this, rather he’s thinking ‘okay, fair enough. Do your worst’) but, when they’re firing at him, it looks as though he never casts a single attacking spell. He only appears to be using shielding charms. Damn powerful ones, yes, but shield charms nonetheless. And that’s very similar to what we see and hear of how he fights. He never attacks first. The threeway duel? Aberforth drew his wand first. The fight at the rally? The Auror attacked first, killing the red-haired witch. And here - he knows the Aurors intend to take him down. In such a situation, you have the right to protect yourself - which he does, with the shield charm. But, again, he doesn’t appear to attack them.

And yet, with only shielding charms, he more than holds his own until Newt sends out the bird. That is INCREDIBLY impressive in and of itself. But it’s even more impressive because of one small detail.

The wand he’s using is not the Elder Wand. It’s (I assume) Percival Graves’ wand. Which means Gellert is doing all this badassery with a wand that is not actually his own, either simply because it didn’t choose him in the first place (which it obviously didn’t), or because, not only did it not choose him, but he also didn’t win it/become that wand’s Master. We don’t know what happened between him and Graves (though I’ve seen somewhere that JKR has confirmed Graves is still alive…can’t for the life of me remember where though!), but damn…that’s really impressive.

(Side note, but it’s really interesting to note that, if Gellert did leave Graves alive, it’s not the first time he’s left someone alive when someone else might have killed them. He did the same with Gregorovitch when he stole the Elder Wand. He got the wand, but left Gregorovitch alive. I’ve wondered about that before, since surely the last thing he should do is leave any sort of trail, especially when looking for a powerful artefact like the Elder Wand. And leaving Gregorovitch alive does, ultimately, come back to bite him in the arse when Voldy comes calling. It’s possible that he simply does not take pleasure in killing, and really only does it in self-defence, which says quite a bit about him, in all honesty…)

But this final point about the wand(s) leads to another issue. If Gellert is master of the elder wand and does all that impressive shit with Graves’ wand that isn’t his…how does he lose to Albus?? He’s shaping up to be immensely powerful, intelligent and magically gifted (and also, in terms of his ideas and motives, ABSOLUTELY RIGHT) and yet…Albus beats him? I’m not saying Albus isn’t powerful as fuck and a damn good duellist (he certainly is), but I feel like Gellert is more than a match for him - and they both know it. And yet…Albus wins the duel, and the Elder Wand. It seems suspicious to me. As though…actually, yes. I’m going to say it. I’m now 1000% convinced that Gellert might not have outright surrendered, but he was absolutely holding back against Albus and, in the end, for reasons currently unknown, he threw the duel.

[thistlecatfics]

How do you feel about James threatening to take off Snape's underwear in front of a group of fellow students? And using that to try and coerce Lily into a date with him? I've seen different takes which included sexual assault (which isn't wrong by our standards, per se, including showing underwear in the first place) to teenage antics. Basically, how do you feel this action reflects on who James is as a person - ignoring the arguments of Marauders vs Snape being "justified" or not. 1/2

2. An aside, where does it say in book text that Mulciber used Levicorpus against Mary Macdonald? (I think I saw that in a discussion on meta here.) I can't find any part of the book that confirms what was actually done to her. For what it's worth, I tend to think of the characters all fighting a small war during the marauder era, and find "who bullied who" discussions pointless, especially in the later years.

First off - I cannot be entirely sure I did not send this ask to myself in a fevered state because this is exactly what has been bubbling around in my head for the past week. (so, uh, that is to say, thank you for the ask, anon.)

Second - everything we get about the marauder’s era is through 2+ unreliable narrators which is why it’s so fun! I just reread SWM and am going to offer a few potential interpretations. I’m very much open to more.

Rereading “Snape’s Worst Memory” right now, the first thing that stands out to me is that it is Snape’s memory but the details around James Potter and co are almost absurdly clear given that Snape is “as deeply immersed in the OWL paper as ever, which left Harry free to sit down on the grass between the beech and the bushes and watch the foursome under the tree.” It’s a little difficult for me to understand how everyone is situated but why are the details of MWPP’s conversation intelligible to him?

A few questions right from the start:

To what degree is Snape’s pensieve memory reliable?

To what degree should we see this as a school-based proxy war vs bullying?

To what degree is this moment an aberration vs typical?

“Snape reacted so fast it was as though he had been expecting an attack.” (hyper-vigilance, trauma-response, training, situational awareness, been listening in - lots of ways to read this)

“Students all around had turned to watch… some looked apprehensive, other entertained.” (everyone assumes something is about to happen)

The initial dialogue (grease marks on the parchment) feels super schoolyard bullying.

Scourgify - choking him, seen described as “waterboarding” very cogently though I’m still iffy on that, but we do know it’s very much the lizard brain not the thinking brain that reacts to that - you’re terrified of drowning like that, wizarding or not. It's quite a cruel thing to do.

“Leave him alone.”

“I will if you go out with me, Evans,” said James quickly. “Go on… go out with me and I’ll never lay a wand on old Snivelly again.”

“Quickly!” is such a useless adverb! There are still so many ways of interpreting that! Quickly as in - he’s said this so many times he doesn’t have to think about it? Quickly as in - he’s not thinking and he says a stupid 16 year old thing which he regrets soon after? Quickly as in - this is fun, almost mutual banter? (doubtful as her earlier statement was said “coldly.”) But also like... what the fuck, James? What the actual fuck?

Ok then Sirius says “bad luck, Prongs” briskly, and Snape reaches his wand. Snape curses James with a spell that leaves a gash across his face “spattering his robes with blood.”

(to be fair to Snape, faces bleed super easily, and a shallow cut on the face will bleed just horribly as any rugby player will tell you.)

Then James sends him upside down. Everyone laughs, and even Lily’s “furious expression” “twitches.”

Then we get the Lily/Snape/James interaction bits - they’re fighting, James undoes the Levicorpus and then the Patrificus Totalus at Lily’s insistence, and then, famously, Snape says, “I don’t need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!”

Sirius gently mocks James “who looked furious now.”

And the scene concludes with:

“There was another flash of light, and Snape was one again hanging upside-down in the air.

‘Who wants to see me take off Snivelly’s pants?’”

Honestly rereading the chapter I was hoping for some clear insight, and my main reaction is that I have a renewed understanding for why there’s so much debate about this memory!

Without any context, the concluding moment, that James feels humiliated over a rejection by a girl, and he then physically restrains another man, shows off his underwear and threatens to take them off in front of a crowd, feels like standard issue sexual violence (in the sort of hazing/bullying type.)

In context, given that we know Snape and his friends are about to be (or already have been) inducted as Death Eaters, a process that involves murder, this feels like a school-based proxy war in a larger fight and while it might be sexualized violence, it’s not so outside the pale as it would be in our own high school context.

Alright now that I have thoroughly confused myself and gotten nowhere, let me focus on the actual questions given.

"Basically, how do you feel this action reflects on who James is as a person"

Badly! It reflects badly!

To me, I see him as your typical Social Justice Bro - he’ll say the right words, fight against the Baddies with genuine fervor, but he still very much sees women as prizes to be won in exchange for his good behavior.

This is SUCH a common type of person and the idea that Quidditch star, wealthy only child, brilliant Jame Potter falls into that trap is not surprising.

I see there being three options fans can take here:

This memory is accurate and representative: James Potter, like many men, fights on the good side but harbors misogynistic views and treats the women in his life like objects and is willing to use sexualized violence against others as a means of asserting his own masculinity.

This memory is accurate but not representative: This is the worst James Potter ever acted. He never behaved this way again. He apologized to Lily. He did his feminist reading. He worked on his own shit. (I think this is the one JKR wants us to take? But who knows and who cares with her.)

This memory is not accurate: Snape, being very smart and very highly motivated, like many people like him, has slowly and steadily edited his own memories to better fit into a narrative he feels comfortable with. (This explains why his recollections of the MWPP conversations are so accurate and unflattering and also why he seems to have done zero healing or maturing in the past 10 years and bullies children. He has been stewing in his own edited memories rather than healing and moving on.)

I can vibe with all of them, depending on what kind of story I want to write/read/imagine.

where does it say in book text that Mulciber used Levicorpus against Mary Macdonald?

It doesn’t. I think I remember the meta you’re referencing (I remember it being very good and interesting!)

“Mulciber! What do you see in him, Sev, he’s creepy! D’you know what he tried to do to Mary Macdonald the other day?”

…

“It was Dark Magic, and if you think that’s funny-”

It’s super vague in canon. I interpret it as an act of sexual violence, because that’s where my brain always goes, but it’s incredibly vague!

Anon, I hope you don’t think the fact I managed to write 1,000 words and weasel my way out of answering your questions means I don’t deeply appreciate them! I hope you have a stupendous evening <3 <3

[dmitri-smerdyakov]

The Fantastic Beasts Franchise and JK Rowling

Alright, so...hi everyone.

I don’t know how many people follow this blog anymore because my main blog of operation is now @alwaysahiccupandastrid - I still try to keep this blog relatively active though, just because it was my original blog, I’ve had it since I was 13, and I have so many memories attached to it.

I’m aware that a lot of the people who follow me, especially since late 2016, do so because a) I was a loud and proud Fantastic Beasts fan, b) I wrote some Newtina and Jakweenie fic, and c)...I don’t know. I literally don’t know why people bother following me anywhere because I don’t feel like I have a lot to say. But, anyway, many people probably follow me due to Fantastic Beasts and my posts/fanfics within the fandom.

Those who follow my active blog will already know my feelings and thoughts, but because of the fact many things about this blog - me, the posts for the last four-ish years, the url itself - are Beasts related, I felt it was necessary to come and write an actual post here instead of just reblogging things and calling it a day. I’ve always been very outspoken online, but I’ve been avoiding a certain topic of conversation on this blog for years now, and I’m finally in a place where we can discuss it.

I am, of course, talking about the hot topic that is JK Rowling.

Back in the days between FBAWTFT and FBTCOG, I was a very outspoken defender of JK Rowling and her decision to defend Johnny Depp’s inclusion in the films. Now, this is something I still stand by to this day, and due to the evidence that has since come out, I’m even more steadfast in the opinion that keeping Depp was a great decision. I am fully in support of him and the way he’s currently battling against his abuser. But that’s not what I’m here to talk about right now. As I was saying, back in the day, I was outspoken about the opinion that “we don’t know the full story” etc., and as a result I received very colourful anon messages. Now, to my knowledge, none of these were about JKR being a TERF/transphone, but I think it’s important to mention that at the time I scoffed at the idea she could be one. I openly admit that I didn’t listen to what other people - including actual trans individuals - were saying about JKR and her transphobia because I frankly didn’t want to admit it. I didn’t want to admit that the person who wrote something that saved my life could be so hateful and a bad person - that, and at the time I passed it all off as “wokeness out of control”.

It is now 2020. Up until last Saturday night, I was still in support of JK Rowling - I didn’t agree with some of the stuff she had said, but I was trying to be positive and have hope by telling myself that she didn’t mean to be transphobic, that she just didn’t know what she was doing was wrong, even though the evidence clearly showed otherwise (I.e. her liking transphobic / radfem tweets). I said to my followers on my Beasts page that instead of cancelling people outright, we should be attempting to educate them instead, and if they choose not to learn then fine. And, being 100% obvious, I didn’t want to admit it because I frankly already was feeling annoyed at two different Beasts cast members for different reasons: Ezra Miller (for choking a girl) and Dan Fogler (for his tweet about BLM - admittedly that was probably him being well intentioned but not saying it right). So yeah, I didn’t want to cancel another member of the Beasts “family”.

I had JKR’s tweets on notifications, and for the most part over the last few weeks, it was all about the Ickabog. However, on Saturday night I noticed that she had suddenly tweeted something completely different, and I looked at it. Given that I had adamantly defended her and said “freedom of speech” for so long, it’s telling that my first thought upon seeing her tweet was literally “for fuck sake, Jo, why”.

I won’t post her tweets here but to sum that first tweet up, it was her being annoyed over the term “people who menstruate” being used in an article instead of “woman”, and mockingly saying “there used to be a word for that” before pretending she didn’t know the word. She knew that tweeting it would start arguments and anger, and yet she still made the decision to do so. Her follow up tweets frankly dug the hole deeper; she tried to defend herself by saying, to sum it up, “I have a butch lesbian friend who agrees with me” “I just care about women’s rights!” And “IF trans people were marginalised I’d march with you!” (“If”, of course, being the real kicker here because what do you mean IF. They ARE. Every DAY.)

Since then, JKR has written an essay on her website defending herself and her opinions, and yes, I read it. I read it a few times, in fact. At first, I felt my anger simmer and felt I had been too hasty to make anti JKR jokes, that I was wrong...but then I read it again properly and realised that what she had written was a piece that turned herself into the victim, and that despite putting on the appearance of her saying she supports trans people, including the phrases “I support trans people” and “of course trans women are real women”, she still spewed much transphobic vitriol and hate. She cited no sources for any of her proclamations or statements about statistics, implied that trans men transition to escape their “womanhood”, that trans women are men in dresses, that trans women are dangerous to “real” women (aka cis women) and shouldn’t be allowed into women’s changing rooms or toilets. There was also the autism comment, and the implication of autistic girls somehow not being able to make decisions or whatever.

I’m going to get straight to the point: I don’t support JK Rowling or her radical feminism.

As someone who is a proud feminist (libfem?), I can honestly say that never have I felt threatened or like I was being silenced by the inclusion of trans women in feminist spaces or conversation. Never. In my second year at sixth form, I was in charge of the LGBTQ+ club until a new leader with better leadership skills could step in, and - put simply - that year, the club was made almost entirely of first year transgender students. Even though I had called myself a trans ally for years, I realised there was a lot I didn’t know, and I learnt quite a lot from these students. I continue to still learn today. They were some of the nicest and most intelligent people I got the chance to meet, and I can truly say that at no point was I ever worried to be in a room alone with a trans woman, nor was I concerned about which bathroom they went in - bathrooms are bathrooms. Speaking of bathrooms...when I was at uni during a particularly tense rehearsal a few weeks before our final show last year, a guy in our group made me cry and I ran to the women’s bathroom to escape. Not only did the other girls come to comfort me, but you know what? The guy came in and apologised profusely to me. Did any of us girls give a shit about having a guy in our toilet? Absolutely not. It’s a fucking toilet. And, on that note, I was never worried about a trans woman or even a cis man attacking me in the toilets. You know who DID attack me in the toilets regularly? Other cisgender women.

As a feminist, I fully support trans women and am not threatened by the inclusion of trans women in women’s spaces or in women’s rights discussions. While I agree that cis women and trans women inevitably go through different struggles, at the end of the day, we all identify as women and are women. I think that if your feminism is so threatened by the existence of trans women - TERFs, RadFems, JKR, looking at you - then your feminism is flimsy and not feminism at all.

As a woman, I find it highly offensive that JKR and many RadFems focus so much of womanhood and feminism on an involuntary biological function that, frankly, many of us would rather do without. Yeah, I’m talking about periods - no matter how proud I am to be a woman, I still fucking hate periods and would get rid of mine if I could without erasing my chance of having kids someday. I can hear the RadFems accusing me of “internalised woman hatred” for saying I hate my periods, but you know what, they suck and they hurt and fuck them. The fact that JKR (also the the radfem movement) reduced “women” to just people who menstruate and can have children, and vice versa, is incredibly offensive and misogynistic. For a start, trans men menstruate, intersex people can, non binary can etc. Next, not even ALL cis women have periods - women who are menopausal, young women who haven’t started puberty yet (some do start very late), some women don’t have regular cycles, some women have medical problems that affect their cycle, some women are on birth control that can stop their cycles. So the idea of women being defined as “those who menstruate” is offensive not only to trans/intersex/non binary individuals but also to cis ones too.

As I write this, I’m a 22 year old woman who is still learning and changing every day, and one of the things that I’ve found myself thinking about recently - especially since we’re in lockdown and we have nothing BUT time to think - is about myself and my identity as a woman. What prompted this was when I saw Greta Gerwig’s adaptation of Louisa May Alcott’s beloved book, “Little Women”, which I’ve since read, for my birthday back in January, and I left the cinema feeling exalted and powerful with my own identity as a woman. (I’ll be returning to LW in a bit)

After some thinking, I’ve realised some things. For me, my identity as a woman is not just because once a month my uterus decides to shed; I do not identify as a woman just because I have certain physical features. I am not a particularly feminine person either, and I’m what some may call a “tomboy” (a phrase I actually don’t mind but I know a lot of people do for understandable reasons since it’s a phrase designed to differentiate people who don’t conform to society’s expectations etc) because I prefer video games and more geeky stuff to shopping or dressing up or make up.

For me, there is no one way a person has to be or appear in order to identify as a woman. Women are beautiful, complex human beings; we are not defined by our genitalia, by an involuntary biological process. Women are strong, intelligent, and interesting people - no two are the same. For example, some decide to raise families, some choose to pursue a career, some do both - all of these are valid and none are more “feminist” or “womanly” than the others, because it’s our as women. I guarantee that if you lined up every single woman in the world - cis AND trans - no two would be the exact same.

I mentioned “Little Women” earlier, and as I was pondering over what makes me identify as a “woman”, I thought a lot about a certain quote from the 2019 film that has stayed with me since it was first said in the release of the trailer. It’s spoken by Jo March to her mother, and I’ve started to understand what for me makes me a woman.

For me, being a woman is all of this: having minds, hearts, souls, ambition, talent, and being beautiful each in our own ways. Women are capable of love and empathy, capable of desire, capable of the most complex and human feelings and emotions, and coming out the stronger for it.

Sex is one thing; gender identity is another.

I won’t dissect every single thing JKR wrote in her essay, but I will just say this: her comments regarding autistic girls are extremely tone deaf and she does not speak for those with autism. I’m going to be honest and admit something here I haven’t before: I have not been diagnosed with autism or aspergers but I AM currently on the waiting list to see someone who COULD diagnose me. Apparently I show signs of a potential diagnosis, so...we’ll have to see. But I have friends who are autistic, and they’re disgusted by JKR trying to use them to support her TERF arguments. Autistic and other neurodivergent people are absolutely capable of making decisions and are NOT people who need to be babied or have their hands held, to be told who they are. It’s incredibly ableist of JK Rowling frankly.

I would also like to point out... I’ve seen people saying “but she doesn’t hate autistic people, Newt is autistic!!!” - yes, but JKR didn’t write him as autistic. Eddie Redmayne chose to play Newt as autistic - JK Rowling didn’t do shit.

It’s also time that I acknowledge that both Potter and Beasts inevitably hold JKR’s problematic views, and that by denying her ownership of her work, we’re not holding her accountable for the horrible things she’s done. This includes - but is not limited to -:

Anti-Semitic stereotypes in the goblins

Lycanthropy being used as a metaphor for AIDS - an illness that is heavily associated to the gay community, and also there was the panic of the AIDs crisis in the 90s where much misinformation and homophobia was generated and spread because of it.

Adding further to the lycanthropy point, one of the infected individuals - Greyback - is stated to have a sick preference for infecting children. Not only are werewolves tied to harmful gay/AIDs stereotypes, but also to the disgusting and frankly wrong notion that gay people are pedophiles.

The only Asian character is called Cho Chang. Cho Chang. That’s two steps away from outright just calling her “Ching Chong”. It’s not a name an actual Asian person would have.

The Goldstein sisters are probably distantly related to Anthony Goldstein, who JKR confirmed (on Twitter of course) is Jewish, meaning that Tina and Queenie are most likely Jewish too (and Goldstein is a Jewish surname). However, despite the fact that the first FBaWTFT is set DURING Hanukkah in 1926, there’s zero signs of them celebrating or observing it. Maybe that’s more on set design than anything else, but come on - if I, a fanfic writer, can do some research, JK/the crew of a major movie can too!

Adding on from that, gotta love how one of the JEWISH main characters then decides to join the Wizarding world equivalent of Hitler. I already had problems with Queenie’s characterisation in CoG, but that’s the icing on the cake.

POC/Black characters - in both series but since I’m a Beasts blog... Seraphina Picquery, a Black female president serving a term during a MAJOR wizarding world crisis, is severely reduced to have only 3 lines in CoG. Nagini’s only purpose is to be the only friend of Credence, a white man, before he joins Wizard Hitler and abandons her; she’s also an Asian character who we know one day permanently becomes a SNAKE, and who goes on to actually have a piece of Voldemort’s soul inside of her?? And some do see her as his slave, though you could argue that she’s actually the only being that he holds any love or respect for. Leta Lestrange is a half-black woman who is killed/literally sacrifices herself for TWO WHITE MEN, and who’s death was literally confirmed to have been added in last minute.

Also, the whole Lestrange storyline was fucking nasty: white Lestrange Sr imperius-ed a black woman (Yusuf Kama’s mother), raped her, and she then died in childbirth. I’m sorry, what the fuck??

In Harry Potter, Seamus is a terrible stereotype of an Irish person - he likes to blow things up. Look up the IRA and their bombings. Fucking Irish stereotype. As someone with Irish grandparents and who is proud of their Irish heritage, this really pisses me off.

Let’s not forget the whole Native American cultural appropriation. That truly speaks for itself.

So here is where I speak candidly to everyone who follows me and/or sees this post. While Beasts is no longer my No. 1 fandom these days, it and Potter still hold a huge piece of my heart. I have 5 wizarding world tattoos, so much merchandise, and I can safely say that being a fan of both series has shaped me as a person. Both of those series helped me get through the darkest days of my life, including bullying at school, my Nan passing away, and my mental health struggles.

This is why what’s happened has impacted me so much and broken my heart. For me, it feels like it’s tainted now because of Jo and her views. I know that we should separate the art from the artist, but when her views are so clearly woven into the very fabric of the Wizarding world, it’s a huge problem.

Here’s another part of the dilemma - I do not wish for the Beasts films to be cancelled. I’m well aware that the *cough* people who dislike me will say I’m trying to be negative, trying to boycott the series blah blah blah, but that’s truly the last thing I want. I still love the story, the characters, the soundtrack, and I want to know how it ends, if only for my own piece of mind. It’s also important to add that by boycotting Beasts, it’s also harming the hard working thousands of others who worked on the films: the cast, the crew, the extras, the musicians, etc., not to mention the fans who actually are invested in the series and have taken solace in it. It’s not fair for them to all suffer over the actions of one TERF.

This is one of my biggest worries, however: the Fantastic Beasts films do NOT have a good reputation as it is. The second film was boycotted by some due to Depp, and now there’s talk of people boycotting number 3 because of JK Rowling. Lots of people already talk hatred about it, and this will only fire that hatred up even more.

There’s also talk of Eddie Redmayne potentially being kicked from the franchise due to a “leak” that he doesn’t want to work with JKR anymore, but this could be sensationalist news reporting. But if it came down to it, I can honestly say that I would rather continue to have Eddie play Newt than keep JKR as a writer. Eddie has done more for Newt than even JKR has, and if he goes, then that will be the last straw for me within the fandom. That will be when I take a sharp exit out, sell my FB merch and have my tattoos covered.

To add, the Fantastic Beasts scripts are...not great. Or, at least, what we saw on-screen wasn’t. Maybe that’s David Yates being the literal worst (fuck you, Yates, you suck) and cutting all the parts with strong female characters, but I honestly don’t think that JKR can write screenplays well at all. I think she’s clearly better at writing books, and that’s fine - books obviously allow for more time to explore characters and story/plot arcs etc, and film scripts offer way less of those chances. I don’t think screenplays allow her to write what she needs to in order to tell the story she wants to, hence why CoG was kind of a hot mess. So maybe it’s just that she’s not suited for screenplays and should stick to books.

Honestly, I kind of just wish that WB would hire another person to finish writing the Fantastic Beasts movies - obviously they’d have to keep JKR on board to tell them the actual plot, but get someone who can actually write screenplays and not be problematic to write them.

By now I’ve gone on long enough that I’ve forgotten my original intent while writing this, so I’ll try to sum up and end now. In short, I am extremely disappointed in JK Rowling and do not support her or her views any longer.

I don’t know how any of you guys are feeling but I would be interested to hear other people’s thoughts, especially other Fantastic Beasts fans. I want to also add that, as always, my DMs and inbox are always open - if not here, then always at @alwaysahiccupandastrid where I’m more active nowadays.

Finally, you guys don’t need me - a white cis woman - to tell you this but you’re all valid and magical and fuck JK Rowling. Her characters would all be ashamed of her, and the characters we grew up with would not stand for the bigotry and vile hatred she spreads under the guise of ““protecting women””. Several of the amazing actors from Potter and Beasts have spoken out against her and her tweets: Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, Bonnie Wright, Katie Leung, Chris Rankin, Eddie Redmayne. Some have been...less inspiring (Tom Felton, Evanna Lynch, looking at you two 👀)

I’m sending love to everyone right now. I wish I could say something more useful but I’ve spoken enough - I’ve made my opinion clear. I love you all, please stay safe.

[catubarca]

Harry Potter Next Generation Headcanons

im bored. im full of emotions, and am rly missing the HP world... i just want to write down my headcannons for the next gen kiddos tbh.

please remember these are just my opinions? its okay if yours are different. im just bored and want to share my thoughts,,

Teddy Lupin

his name is Theodore Remus “Teddy” Lupin. it’s just what it is

I don’t care what JKR says, to me his name will always be Theodore

i can’t do this “Edward” stuff im so sorry,,,

h u f f l e p u f f

proper school uniform? never heard of it

messy hair, messy clothes

punk rock child

we’re talking like,,,at least two (2) lip piercings ok

absolutely terrible in herbology. do not leave this child alone in a greenhouse, bad things happen

fuckin hoards chocolate

its a problem

dating Victorie Weasley

random bursts of dancing

keeps a lock of hair pink for his mother

lives with the Potters, enjoys pretending to be Ginny to ground his siblings

“Lily, why aren’t you coming out of your room? Dinner’s ready?” “You said I’m grounded! You tell me!” “What? Oh, for the- THEODORE REMUS LUPIN-“

s m i r k s

effortlessly cool,,, but so so dorky,,, in a cool way

Victorie Weasley

ravenclaw!

looks a lot like her mother, Fleur, but inherited those Weasley freckles

a little confused a lot of the time

absolute sweet tooth (teddy abuses this fact a lot)

Mom Friend™

will help you with your homework

always got a book on her

super beautiful and like,,,, the absolute nicest person,,, but

cannot dance

like at all

adores Charms class

a softie you don’t want to cross

“I’m the oldest”

Dominique Weasley

inherited the Classic Weasley Red Hair™

idolises her Uncle Charlie

“I wanna save animals and work with cool dragons, just like Uncle Charlie does!”

Bill almost has a heart attack

always bringing stray animals home

(“is that a lizard in your pocket, Dominique?” “Yes! His name is Blob.” “You know how your father’s afraid of reptiles, sweetheart, you can’t bring it inside.”)

Gryffindor child

favourite class is definitely Care of Magical Creatures, she and Hagrid like to talk about proper care methods for rare creatures

perpetual dirt stains

BIG middle child vibes

doesn’t really label her sexuality… just kinda does what she wants rly

all the pets in Hogwarts love her

rumours are she’s got an innate, natural magical ability to make them all love her

(she feeds them under the table)

it’s a mystery

big advocate for animal rights

f e m i n i s t

willing to throw hands at all times

usually all smiles though

one of those people who use their whole bodies to laugh

kind of an accidental heartthrob

romcoms

Louis Weasley

looks the most like his mother

ravenclaw

absolutely filled with curiosity. always reading or talking or learning

random facts

(how do you even find that sort of information?

you don’t want to know)

coffee boy

sort of musically talented?

he and James Sirius preach the importance of skincare to all who will listen

secretly full of sass and dry wit

vry graceful and fluid

e y e r o l l

awkward smiles? can never smile properly in photos

on the ravenclaw quidditch team

Ravenclaw Prefect

(“You might be older, but I’m taller.” “Fuck off!”)

only watches High Quality™ tv shows/media

kind of a disaster, despite the gracefulness

Molly Weasley

Classic red hair

comes across as a bit uptight, like her father

I don’t care what you think. (She really cares what you think.)

E y e b r o w s

death glares

drinks like 5 cups of coffee in the morning

studies,,, like a lot

definitely a Gryffindor though

mom jeans

always ready to debate a topic. will destroy opponents.

has been trying to start a successful Debate Club for like 4 years now

naturally falls into the position of a group leader

would be a teacher’s pet, if she wasn’t ready At All Times™ to debate the relevancy of the course syllabus or outdated teaching methods

got into a fight with Severus Snape’s portrait in Headmistress McGonagall’s office.

(Dumbledore’s portrait was laughing, until she turned and ragged on him for a bit. Minerva thought it was absolutely hilarious, so she just let Molly go at it for a while).

full of rage towards everything, but wears a very careful mask of aloofness

to calm down, she likes painting her nails

she’s very good at it

she’s also very good at painting and art in general, weirdly enough

Lucy Weasley

G R Y F F I N D O R

adores shitty puns and has a terrible sense of humour

brown hair, not red

loves to prank people, which makes her Uncle George very proud

Percy complains about her behaviour, but makes sure he knows he’s proud too

(charming all the cauldrons in the potions classroom to scream whenever they’re stirred takes a more complex understanding of spell work than one would expect).

a pit of a punk streak

rly loves hip hop

high key drama queen

does she ever stop yelling? we’re yet to find out

average grades in terms of theory, but she’s the best in terms of applying information

especially for her pranks

has allies throughout the castle, from the portraits to the students

the bigger the prank, the better

but is a firm believer in “confuse, don’t abuse”

all her pranks are mostly harmless

is a surprising lover of older literature, like Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, an influence of her sister

a bit rebellious

Fred Weasley II

name isn’t officially “the second”, but it sounds cooler

James Potter, Lucy Weasley, Molly Weasley and Fred Weasley are like the Marauders 2.0

says “squad” and “lit” unironically

niche humour

hipster vibes

avid music lover

smiley sunshine child

takes after his mother the most in looks, just like his sister

a chill type of gryffindor

plays quidditch, and is an excellent chaser, just like his mother

the absolute undisputed King™ of puppy-dog eyes

just,,,, beautiful

the True teacher’s pet

hands in his work on time,, asks lots of questions,,, likes helping students understand their work,, what a boy

can hella nyoom

runs so fast

look at him go

as you might expect, loves a good prank. always down for a laugh

Roxanne Weasley

Gryffindor and pROUD

absolute Queen tbh

was definitely Head Prefect or Gryffindor Prefect at some point

loved by the school

absolute legend

G I R L   P O W E R

infectious laughter

has a soft spot for Louis Weasley and Scorpius Malfoy

these poor disaster children,,,, they need a Mother

M O M

big mom vibes

mothers the hell out of all the first years

a feminist through and through

can be found nodding aggressively to Molly Weasley’s semi-deranged, furious ranting

YAAAASS

loves slang. uses so much slang. always up to date with trends and memes

has all the gossip

becomes a mess around pretty girls

absolute blushing, stuttering disaster around cute girls oh my god

her eye make-up game is killer

sparkly

Distinguished Lesbian

Rosie Weasley

did someone say Weasley��?

red hair and freckles and curls oh my

on the autism spectrum, has trouble socialising sometimes

hella passionate about stuff

hangs out with Scorpius and Albus, the Golden Trio 2.0

f em ini st

her jokes are the best. high quality sense of humour.

Ravenclaw

likes to read. it’s quiet in the school library, which is nice.

abysmal at herbology

surprisingly good at Care of Magical Creatures though? Animals are just,,, so much easier to deal with

overall, really good grades though

bit of a silent type, but she’s actually a riot to hang out with

actually pretty good at quidditch? She’s not on the team, and she’s not super interested in playing, but?? She’s not bad??

She can land a solid hit with a beater’s bat

(eyes you judgementally over the top of a book)

dry wit humour

will throw hands over chess

Hugo Weasley

hufflepuff

unbeatable at chess, like his dad

a lost puppy

someone please help this child

softie

kind of low-key emotional

so supportive!! and loyal!! high-key best friend material

foodie. loves food. please feed him.

takes a bit more after his dad appearance wise

loves to cook. spends lots of time with grandma Molly and his dad in the kitchen

Professor Longbottom is his favourite professor, because he’s more chilled and laidback.

other professors and classes fill him with Distress™

loves astronomy too

maths whizz, so good at arithmancy

(“uh, actually-“)

a little bossy, like his mother

is trying so hard

maybe a little too hard

a bit insecure and nervous, but so soft

please treat this child carefully and with love

James Sirius Potter

Gryffindor

L O U D

a fucking disaster child

what’d you expect, putting “James” and “Sirius” together?

DRAMATIC GASPING

flails his hands around when he talks

s t r u t s

bisexual mess, had a crush on both the Longbottom children at some point

is better than you at everything

including being a different gender

fuck you that’s why

so pretty

he’s so pretty

is thIS CHILD EVER NOT LAUGHING AT SOMETHING OH My god

laughs at everything

all the time

always

high-key emotional

badly timed finger guns

looks like a model in photos? wtf?

gets invited to Girls Nights™

wears nail polish and makeup

loves to yell at people about gender roles and defying stereotypes

TEA SIS

not on the quidditch team surprisingly enough, even though he’s pretty good

prefers to be in the stands, doing A+ commentary on the games

if he can get Fred to stop mid-air due to unbearable, suffocating laughter at least once a game it’s a win in his books

has it OUT for the hufflepuff quidditch team and no one knows why??

definitely makes puns on his name

it drives everyone insane

harry always replies he’s just making his namesake proud

that also drives everyone insane

smug lil shit

Albus Severus Potter

“It’s just Al.”

S L Y T H E R I N

will always find a way to get what he wants, eventually

“dad, why did you name me this way?”

unimpressed

sigh

hella smart. is topping at least five classes

Aunt Hermione is his favourite. She’s the fucking Mistress of Magic! All that power, the ability to make change and improve the Magical World as a whole-

sass master

the reason headmistress mcgonagall keeps a bottle of scotch under her desk at all times

the only potter child to inherit The Eyes™

absolute insomniac

kind of emo, but turns into a fucking softie around Scorpius Malfoy it’s hilarious

adverse to violence. prefers a verbal beatdown method

really tall? despite having shorties for parents??? no one saw it coming

(especially not Teddy. He’s always scared of losing his last few inches of height)

Functional Gay

he’s on the slytherin quidditch team, as a seeker

Lily Luna Potter

Gryffindor

FEMINIST

do not mess with lily luna potter

she may seem cute and sweet, but she will destroy you

inherited her father’s black hair

disaster lesbian

transfiguration is her favourite subject, by far

has no idea what she wants to do with the rest of her life.

Existential Crisis Father-Daughter Bonding Time™

do you ever sleep?

takes after Ginny the most in personality

also, kind of the most like James Fleamont Potter in personality, too?

Loves to help her brother out with pranks, laughs at him when he gets caught and she gets away with it

The only one of the Potter Children who hasn’t got into a fight with Severus Snape’s portrait

because she just ignores him instead

loves talking to the portraits around the castle

Super good at Quidditch, is on the team as a Chaser

Quidditch Captain at some point

adores Hagrid, but who out of the Potter children doesn’t?

Idolises Minerva McGonagall

just as oblivious as her father

Scorpius Malfoy

Actually in Ravenclaw, not Slytherin, much to many people’s surprise

abSOLUTE DADDY’S BOY

super close with his dad

Draco is just so supportive of like everything he does (unlike his father)

classic blonde malfoy looks

actually really funny?

a cuddler. loves hugs. always leeching warmth off of someone

he and Rosie sometimes finger-tip-touch which is their version of a hug, because he know’s she’s not super comfortable with touch

was basically adopted by the Weasley’s and Potter’s

James Sirius will murder for this child

booknerd, always rambling to Al and Rosie about new books coming out he’s interested in reading.

has had a crush on Albus Potter since like 1st year

always worried about making his dad proud, and keeping up the Malfoy name

sweet tooth

he’s just,, soft. just a warm, happy child. he wants love, and affection. someone tell him he’s doing okay, please.

needs,,, validation,,,

he’ll tell you out loud that he has no favourite aunts or uncles, but he secretly really likes spending time with his Uncle Ron

they had a talk, once, in like the middle of the night at a sleepover with Rosie and Al, about feeling insecure in comparison to others, and learning to be proud of yourself for your achievements

there were a few tears, but it was nice

Ron was actually the third person he told, besides his dad and Rosie, about having a crush on Al

openly a disaster romantic. trash taste in romance novels.

always welcome in the Potter-Weasley households

[starlitshores]

Harry Potter & the Death of the Author.

First, and most importantly: I stand in solidarity with trans women and trans men. I hope you know that you are an integral part of our community, that you are loved and welcomed and needed, and that so many of us see and celebrate you. I hope you are safe and happy and loved at home, but if home is a tough situation for you, know that there will be a time when a found family will embrace you. We’re waiting for you. You matter and you belong.

tl;dr beneath the cut: HP fandom oldbie good memories. Queer adolescence. JKR = evil TERF. Emma Watson and Daniel Radcliffe are great. Death of the Author.

There has been so much going on this month, and this may seem trivial in comparison to all of that, but J.K. Rowling continuing her TERFy nonsense during Pride Month really hit me in the gut.

Harry Potter has been an overwhelmingly positive force in my life.

I am Fandom Old. I have been extremely invested in Harry Potter since early 2000. I was given a paperback of Philosopher’s Stone for Christmas when I was 12, right before getting Mono and reading PS, CoS and PoA 5 times each while stuck at home. Goblet of Fire was my first queer reading. (Harry was rapidly becoming obsessed with Draco Malfoy!) I joined FictionAlley in 2001 and still remember the old SCUSA ship names and why H/D was “SS Guns ‘n’ Handcuffs” because I beta’d chapters of Irresistible Poison for Rhysenn. I made my first LJ account in February 2003, back when you needed an invitation. Hell, a fandom friend gave me the invitation for my first Gmail account when it was still in beta and everyone had Hotmail accounts with 1MB of space.

I wrote fics with my best and now oldest friend who I met in Armchair Chat on a Sunday afternoon. We later became Armchair mods and people recognised us for the first time at a meetup at Woody’s on Church Street. In my second year Romantics lecture I made a friend because of Harry Potter who ended up being a light in my life and whose wedding I was meant to attend this summer. She introduced me to two of my best friends in London, who I consider family. I was in the room in Toronto when we all found out (and panicked) about Strikethrough. I was there on the sidelines when the idea for AO3 was formed, when it was created, when we were forced to migrate away from LJ and it fractured our community.

I’ve participated in and moderated con panels. I had a kickass time with some kickass ladies in hotel rooms in Chicago and Orlando (you know who you are!). That time I crossed the border at Sarnia and was directed to a Tim’s down the road? Car full of HP girls and luggage (and alcohol). I did drunk karaoke with Libba Bray and almost threw up on Veronica Roth’s amazing yellow leather jacket after that hell ride at Universal. Chris Rankin and I enjoyed Starbucks and a post-con pre-flight chat in the Orlando airport lounge. I attended the press preview of HP7:P1 in London and my students were super jealous.

I have original Sherant and reallycorking pencil sketches. I have SO MANY BUTTONS and a baseball T that is now 16 years old which says “Because every hero needs a dragon.” There are handwritten beta edits on paper printouts of Beautiful World by Cinnamon in a box in my parents’ basement. I am still friends or friendly with people on both sides of That Wank. Yeah You Know Which Wank I’m Talking About.

Over those many years I made a lot of friends, several of whom I’ve kept in touch with even though we’ve all grown up and are well into our 30′s or 40′s and have real jobs and partners and kids and stuff these days. I’ve chatted with a few of them in the last few days and yeah, we’re feeling fucked up.

At 11, at 14, at 18, at 21, at 25, JKR’s pen was all over my life. Her stories very literally shaped me as a person. And though as an adult I have grown to understand that her stories are deeply problematic, they -- along with Buffy and Lord of the Rings, and Queer As Folk, and The L Word -- were my gateway into queerness. So yes, her TERFy bullshit felt like betrayal the first time around. Now she’s attacking us AGAIN during PRIDE month? WHY?

JKR is a grown fucking adult who got rich off of writing stories for and about vulnerable adolescents, and then should have stopped talking.

Adolescence is the time when kids are learning about and starting to accept who they are and it’s fucking scary for a lot of them when they realise they’re queer. Back before she was opening her big mouth on the regular, her books gave me a safe space to figure myself out when I didn’t fit in anywhere else. But now she won’t stop opening her mouth. And for what? To tell every trans kid who ever read her books that they don’t matter to her and that she doesn’t believe in them.

Those kids are us. Our friends. Our family. Our students. Our colleagues. Our teammates. Our partners.

And that, J.K. Rowling, makes you evil. Evil for using your platform to hurt those kids. Evil for doing it during the time of year they’re meant to feel supported and celebrated. Evil for deciding that you’re somehow a member of our community and somehow a more pure member of our community who is allowed to pass judgement on us because “I have a lesbian friend [who is also a TERF]”. Evil for crying victim when someone calls you out, claiming TERF is a slur and aligning that with misogyny in one of the most hypocritical white liberal woman temper tantrums I’ve seen all week. And that? That is saying something because there’s been a whole lot of that shit this week.

The support of Emma Watson and Daniel Radcliffe means a lot to me. Hearing them affirm wholeheartedly that trans women are women (and trans men are men) and that they stand in solidarity with the queer community in clear opposition to the TERF who gave them their careers? I can’t speak to how trans fans feel right now, but yeah, that means a lot to me.

So. What to do. Well, I was there when the last book was released and we collectively agreed to ignore the epilogue. (Epilogue? What Epilogue?) In our little corner of the fandom the last line of the series was: “I’ve had enough trouble for a lifetime.” I think that’s quite fitting. I’m advocating for us to embrace the Death of the Author.

She may have put it out into the world but we made it ours.

It is ours. We don’t need her anymore.

[warharbinger-blog]

❝ To / have survived the ever-present restlessness of stars. / Wake now. All that we mourn is here already. ❞

               EMMA VANITY. 26. GEMINI. FORMER SLYTHERIN.                         SHE/HER. CIS-WOMAN. NEUTRAL.                HALFBLOOD. SEEKER FOR PUDDLEMERE UNITED. 

TW: MENTIONS OF RACISM, DEATH, DEPRESSION, BULLYING.  LINKS: PINTEREST

emma comes from a big family. the vaynshteyn’s needed to rebuild after the holocaust and wwii. they changed their name to vanity, it was easier to pronounce and an even easier way to assimilate. their blood was muddy, with many muggles and halfbloods in their family but moving to wizarding britain was a sturdy choice. emma is one of ten, one of the  many middle children who grew up in a loving but competitive environment. everyone had to be good at something, little emma frankly didn’t care for it, she was their supporters, their number one fans in everything they did. quidditch wasn’t even on her radar until her family saw a natural talent she had for it during family pick up games. emma swore up and down, she wasn’t in it for the competition, it was exhausting, she just wanted to have fun. she was good at it though, they wanted to nurture it -- the whole family. 

during every shabbat it came up that emma should’ve been doing more than just their little pick up games, that they should put her on a league. emma always rolled her eyes, spitting out a comment with the dry wit & exhaustion of a 90 year old man. they wanted her to WHAT? with whom? often, on shabbas, she’d tsk them, throw a jab at her oldest brother jacob for being obviously jealous that his failed music career was becoming more tragic by the month so he had to pick on someone smaller with more promise, cross her arms, keeping relatively quiet the rest of the night. 

they were a loud, loving, chaotic family, they were proudly themselves, emma loved how she grew up even if she acted exasperated as all hell with them at times. family means everything to the vanity’s, they made their children with care, her parents would always say. emma would pipe up, we get it, you had sex, you made children. everyone would groan, then laugh. it was a serendipity that was untouched from tragedy again for a very very long time.

not long enough, but that’s later. 

racism was still a thing in the wizarding world, whether jkr wants to acknowledge it or not, and while there were poc -- the temple that emma went to was not as diverse as it could’ve been. some of the people she grew up with, though well meaning, were ignorant when it came to being jewish and being a person of color -- many just assumed that emma and the rest of her family were sephardic. the muggle world even in their own community was a little perplexed by this family, but let them have a place to pray and with time welcomed them. emma is no longer as religious as she was as a kid, especially when she started to attend hogwarts most of the year. her siblings only instituted that they had friday night dinners together, but how they chose to practice was up to them. 

hogwarts was an interesting transition for emma, being sorted into slytherin was unexpected and emma wasn’t really the biggest fan of her house going in -- many of her housemates didn’t help with making it a better place for her. she left them alone though, even when they sometimes didn’t leave her alone. when they fucked up her shit, she said her piece and got on with her life. for her first year, she didn’t try to rock the boat at all -- she just observed. some could say she was lying in wait. 

when a group of classmates fucked up her little sister’s shit in her second year, she hatched a plan. some of them happened to be on the quidditch team, right? they fucked up her family, they had tried to fuck her up her time at hogwarts, she’d fuck them up with her presence by trying to get on the quidditch team. when she showed up for try outs, eyebrows rose, a few snickers here and there. what is she doing? she’s just going to add fuel to the fire. when she got on the team in her second year, they were stunned into silence. there was a respect, sure, but there was an anger born from being bested -- emma felt proud but also noticed how she felt good on the field then, proving everyone wrong, not because she needed to but because quidditch was fun. it always had been. 

when her family found out, they freaked. she got three howlers, one from each of her parents and one from her oldest brother jacob saying he was only so bitter because he believed in her so much & emma heard her oldest sister, miriam, yell BULLSHIT in the background. her family came to every one of her games, they cheered her on until they lost their voices, embarrassing emma but there would be moments after games where the best part wouldn’t be actually winning or playing, but seeing her family come together the way they did. seeing her parents so passionate about her, seeing them all so proud. 

to this day, her quidditch is what brings them together being on puddlemere united as their seeker has been nothing short of a privilege, emma knows. but the question of whether or not she would’ve gone as far with quidditch as she did if it wasn’t for her families reaction to it hangs over her head constantly. she knows, she knows they’re being supportive, she knows they were just so unbelievably happy for her that they couldn’t contain it, she knows staying with quidditch was her choice - but god, her family is everything to her. they deserve happiness after everything, she was giving it to them, it had to be enough. 

plus, she was good at quidditch and with practice she was excellent. she gained respect from her housemates, even the prejudiced ones from whom she never wanted their respect because it meant nothing to her -- but they treated her family with more respect by extension, which meant everything. as the years passed, she became captain and emma could say that quidditch was something she enjoyed doing. not just because she was given respect, not just because it felt good to be good at something, but it was a good way to pass time, it improved her life in so many ways, why not dedicate herself to it? when her body gave out, whenever it did, she could find her passion, but this was what she was going to do when she left school -- this was her path -- for now. 

the war got worse, emma’s older siblings were members of the order ( only one at the time was an actual member, the rest were supporters ), but emma felt guilty when she wanted nothing to do with it. not because she didn’t believe in them. she did. her family knew the hard way what had to be done in war to survive & to win, emma couldn’t fathom being able to stomach it. what needed to be done. she felt angry at herself and weak, ever so conflicted, quidditch proved to be the best distraction as she graduated and got onto puddlemere united and she threw herself into the team, the life, the people. straying farther away from her faith, she missed at least one shabbat a month, she never came to temple anymore ( except for the high holidays ), she started to stray a bit from her family. they came to most of her games, still, but there was some tension as emma had been relatively quiet about the war in general -- a topic that the family brought up during almost every conversation. 

what was she supposed to say? she’d never been one to easily reveal her emotions, in fact, she was a private person because she wasn’t always one to talk about herself -- it was just how it was. she wasn’t closed, not really, just not welcoming. this subject brought her shame and guilt, she didn’t want it on display for her entire family because she knew she should’ve done more, that she could’ve. but she wasn’t built for war. she didn’t quite know what she was built for, but it wasn’t war. 

when her youngest sister adina was murdered in a death eater attack almost a year ago, the combination of guilt, grief, anger & trauma started to eat away at her. a small crisis began -- what was she meant for? what was she supposed to do with her life? her family reeled at the loss, they lost the youngest and perhaps the brightest ( in smile, in life -- she had so much more to life to live ) of their family, it was devastating. the love that had always been there was still there, sure, but things that you wouldn’t say to someone you loved no matter how true it was, were said. individual traumas and issues that they were working on, came to the forefront. they may have known how to rebuild, but rebuilding took blood, sweat and tears and they all felt bled dry. 

emma watched her family explode and simply imploded. she’s found herself dealing with depression that makes her isolate herself or distract so intensely she’s almost hurt herself from playing quidditch too much. still, she keeps playing it -- the last year the sport has served as a pillar for her family to hold onto -- emma by proxy. she’s been able to carry herself with grace despite feeling anything but graceful, she’s been able to carry on, which is more than some of her family members can do. since her sister’s death, she’s found herself trying new thing after new thing, trying to find what makes her life full of passion because death is everywhere, it has touched her family, she feels selfish but if she doesn’t find something she loves for herself, she’s worried she’ll lose it. still, as each day passes she feels more and more guilty for not joining the war effort in any way -- sometimes she feels like a coward -- but knowing herself as much as she can, she knows she could do more harm than good if she joined a cause she couldn’t properly contribute to. morally & spiritually it’s the wrong choice, she knows, but when the time comes she hopes she’ll be able to help rebuild the world when the war is done.