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tyrantisterror · 6 months ago

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Some stuff I learned at the Medieval Studies Congress today that will be of interest/use for Midgaheim:

There's a passage of Beowulf that, in the original old English, lists Grendel's kin/fellow descendents of Cain (the biblical first murderer). Two are easily translated to modern English: elves and giants (specifically "gigantes," one of the few times the poem uses a latin word rather than an Old English word, which probably specifically implies these are Biblical giants/nephilim like Goliath). The other two words are hard to parse because they have no modern English equivalent, and different translations use different words to try to give the same flavor. One is translated roughly as phantoms, undead, revenants, draugr, goblins, evil spirits, or demons, while the other is translated as trolls or ogres. However, both of those words mean something different than those equivalents - in the second term's case, it specifically means Jotunn, i.e. frost giants. And that's especially important for two reasons: 1, Grendel is referred to as being most closely related to that term, sometimes outright being called a Jotunn, and 2, Jotunn are VERY different than giants/ogres mythologically speaking, and the Beowulf poet would have known that. Troll is probably the best fit of all modern English monster words, since trolls were synonymous with Jotunns (and most other monsters) early in the history of Germanic languages, but the word Troll now means its own specific thing, so it's still not a good fit, and as the speaker surmised, it's probably best just to translate Jotunn… as Jotunn.

On a related note, the word "Ettin" is derived from Jotunn, so at some point I should make Midgaheim Ettins some sort of sister clade of ogres to Jotunns.

Beowulf says that giants were "wiped out in the flood," and because it specifically uses the Latin word "gigante," it's likely this is a reference to the death of the nephilim in Biblical apocrypha. BUT! Given how "Jotunn" is used often in the poem, it could alternatively refer to the flood of Ymir's blood in Norse mythology that ALSO wiped out a population of giants. OR! it could refer to BOTH, which would be an explicit instance of the poem trying to fit Norse myth and Christian apocrypha into one united mythos. It is possible the Beowulf poet may have been trying the same heretical bullshit I've been doing in Midgaheim.

A prominent theme in Norse myth was people who act monstrously turning into monsters as a result, and it's possibel that the word "Jotunn" may be rooted in the Germanic word for Gluttony, since early descriptions of Jotunns describe them as cannibals/maneaters whose voracious appetites are particularly destructive - a trait that they share with folkloric ogres across Europe.

Dragons, especially in Norse myth, have some psychopomp connotations, particularly with regards to the word "wyrm," which has always had an intended double meaning to include both serpents/reptiles and vermin/invertebrates. A wyrm is both viper and maggot, snake and worm, with the connective trait that unites all things under the category being its ability to inspire a primal fear. The Beowulf dragon specifically has connotations with Death and Rot, living in an ancient grave and ending the life of the near-unkillable hero of the poem. Nidhoggr also fills this role, as do his fellow root-chewer dragons who torment the particularly dishonorable dead in Norse Hel.

Gawain and Lancelot were disaster bisexuals. It is also probably arguable that most if not all of the knights of the round table are disaster bisexuals, but Gawain and Lancelot definitely are.

At least one incarnation of King Arthur kinda blatantly desired to be a throuple with Gwenevere and Lancelot, which would have solved so many problems. Like, he was aware both Lancelot and Gwenevere were more functional when they could fuck, and he loved them both dearly so come on, let them be a throuple.

There's a good argument that many, if not all versions of Mordred could have been gay.

One Gawain story has him accidentally kill a woman while getting into a fight with a knight over a dead white stag, and Gwenevere tells Gawain that from this day on he has to take a solemn vow to ALWAYS respect and protect women. Or, to sum up:

Lanval was a sub and that's why the fairy maiden asked him to visit her. Their dynamic also subverts a lot of medieval expectations of masculinity and feminity in Marie de France's version of the story, which subsequent authors tried to "fix" in later retellings - a big example is how in Marie's version, the Fairy Maiden steers the horse that rescues Lanval, while in subsequent retellings Lanval gets to steer despite the Fairy Maiden being the one who came to the rescue. Marie's version has both of them take on masculine and feminine roles, serving and protecting each other in turn, and seems to have this message that a good relationship should be an equal partnership where both sides shoulder each other's burdens while also caring for themselves. Marie de France continues to be my favorite medieval writer.

There was a lot of argument and theorizing about the nature of souls as incorporeal things that still can feel pain, with a lot of Christians arguing about what pain means to a spirit without a body, and how exactly hellfire can hurt a soul without a body. Dante kinds put the final word on it by drawing on the fact that angels and demons, who are beings of soul without corporeal forms, can create corporeal representations of themselves from air, smoke, fire, and light - damned souls are given substance, and thus pain, by Hellfire that wraps around their bodies, with one passage of inferno describing how the fire surrounding Ulysses curls at one point "almost like a tongue" to allow him to speak. The fire is also something that, depending on how you translate the poem, may be self inflicted - summoned by the sinner, or at least manifesting as result of their sins and faults, which goes with the theme of Dante's Hell where all the punishments are self inflicted/reinforced by the sinners themselves.

There's a medieval French poem about an island called Cokaygne (pronounced "Cocaine," no I'm serious I'm not shitting you it's called Cocaine) where the houses are made of crepes/pancakes, the rivers are made of sweet milk, food is plentiful, the weather is never bad, predators and disease are nonexistent, and the only people who live there are monks and nuns who spend all their time eating, resting, and engaging in kinky and satisfying sex. The poem is a satire of other stories of the time that attempted to describe Heaven, and explicitly says Cokaygne (Cocaine) is better than Heaven, because all you have to do in Heaven is look at clouds and grass, while in Cokaygne (Cocaine) you get to fuck nuns in your pancake house. To get to Cokaygne (Cocaine) you have to sit up to your neck in pigshit for seven years straight. It kinda reminded me of that hobo folk song "The Big Rock Candy Mountain."

Finally (for today), there's a Medieval story that's based on the story of the Buddha that fucks up the concept of "letting go of attachments" when trying to adapt it to fit a medieval french worldview, turning the concept from "free yourself from your desires" to "listen you shouldn't care about material wealth because the wealth you'll get in the spiritual world of Heaven will be WAY better, you get jewels and a throne and stuff it's sick dude," which proves white people have been fucking that concept up in stupid ways for centuries.

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fathercharlesoffdensen · 1 year ago

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Kloktober, Day 4: Fav. Headcanon(s):

- Charles has a Gear brand - don't ask to see it if you value your life, however.

- Nathan being on the autism spectrum is pretty much implied in canon (por ejemplo, massive anxiety about going to the dentist is very common amongst those with ASD / he didn't speak until he was 5 / his occasional "potato chip kick[s]" because they're clearly a safe food for him), but I would argue that that more than anything else was the biggest contributor to his not graduating high school. I assume the school system (in Florida, no less) had little to no accommodations for students with special learning needs when he was growing up, and so he gradually slipped through the cracks. Nathan clearly is a brilliant lyricist/poet, which could have been an asset to him in English class and such with the right teacher. We also see him utilizing the library at Mordhaus, recording himself reading Shakespeare, and attempting to figure out Dethklok's finances during Charles' hiatus, and even though his predilection for frog dissection probably meant he enjoyed the process vs. showed scientific aptitude, it is worth mentioning here. TL;DR: Nathan has been conditioned to believe he's 'stupid,' but I firmly believe he could have made it through school with the proper resources. Perhaps he could have even gotten a college football scholarship.

- Toki's parents' treatment of him is directly related to their religious / prophetical interpretation of his archetypical role as a bringer of death, the same way that people accused of being witches often get mistreated by their families / communities.

- Skwisgaar's father actually is a god, hence why none of the DNA tests performed on the (many) men who slept with his mom were a match.

- Pickles says in "Fatherklok" that he doesn't know his own dad's first name - I headcanon that his family has no idea what his 'real' name is either.

- Part of Murderface's fascination with the Civil War is genealogical, aka he has ancestors who fought in it, etc. Bonus: I like to think his grandfather's massive stroke didn't occur until after Murderface made it through adolescence and that they had at least a somewhat congenial relationship.

#metalocalypse #dethklok #adult swim #army of the doomstar #doomstar requiem #william murderface #skwisgaar skwigelf #toki wartooth #nathan explosion #pickles the drummer #charles foster offdensen #kloktober #2023 #day 4 #october 4th #headcanon

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mgopinoon · 1 month ago

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there’s a bit in Kaia’s times article that reminds me or lends me to think that she wrote it about Austin and her.

There’s bits where she talks about reading a story about the end of a relationship and how that’s helped her, and 2 poets who while they’re relationship ended they still conversed through their poems to one another, or the bit about we are more than what people perceive of us.

None of those things have to mean anything, and we can’t know when she wrote the essay, however, given everything it’s interesting to think about.

Also the bit where she states “I knew I’d be invited into these spaces with rich older people” ah, did you now. And why is that, because you worked hard to achieve that for yourself or because people know you look like your mom and wanted to use that to their advantage

There’s also the sad bit where she talks about wanting to be perceived as capable of having grown up conversations when she was 16 and new to New York and working. Which, while I don’t condone her behaviour or things she’s decided to do or profited from, it’s still unfortunate to see her trying to change who she was or who she could have been to fit a role that other people assumed of her or expected her to be (daughter of a model).

I went to read her essay before answering and this is my opinion:

There are many contradictions in what she expresses as a person and what her philosophy of life and love is. It makes me very sad that she grew up with a family and in an environment where they did not let her be a child or live her "normal" adolescence (her family has the resources to not make her work at 16). She talks about how she decided to read to be a more intellectual woman and to be able to relate to adults that she considered intellectual (she has a serious problem with people seeing her as intelligent) and be part of that environment. She implies that this was in the past and that she learned from those experiences, but if that is so, why is she with a man 10 years older than her? and why does she change her whole personality to fit in with him? For me she is still the same immature girl who seeks approval from older people and who needs to show herself to be intellectual.

It is revealing that she has spoken about romantic relationships, how she would like them to be and how she takes a break. She quotes a phrase from a book that identifies her that says: "the only thing you can have left after a relationship is pain and an old t-shirt. But you would do it again anyway" where she basically says that she would repeat it because of the experience lived and what she learned. Then to fit in and sell herself as a "feminist" she says that she reads books by almost only women that this has helped her define how she likes to live a romantic relationship "I am realizing how important it is for women in relationships to be represented from their own point of view, and how useful that has been for me when I was young and discovered my sexuality and what it means to be in a relationship. It is common to be afraid as a woman of losing yourself in a relationship with another person, especially if that other person is a man in a patriarchal world" Girl let me tell you that if you lost yourself in your relationship that you want to keep even if it costs you your mental health and you have to pretend to be someone you are not.

Kaia then talks about a piece that identifies her that says “Even after they broke up, they continued to send each other poems and write about each other, posting stories of their love. I find it extraordinary that the end of their romantic collaboration didn’t mean the end of their artistic collaboration. With Gilbert being older and a more established poet than Gregg when they got together, seeing how much respect he had for her and her perspective on how things played out in their relationship is deeply meaningful; that’s the kind of love I believe in.” This screams to me that her relationship with Austin is broken, but that she wants to stay around and I immediately think of the life&style article and her psychopathic behavior to get Austin’s attention. Finally she talks about the societal pressure to look or be a certain way and that she’s no longer interested. Girl you injected your lips, you’re in questionable nutritional status and you take daily walks just to pretend to be something you’re not. This essay was about what you want to be or what you are? and that.

Sorry for the length, there were many things there that caught my attention, I must admit that you have the gift of the word and that they wrote a good essay for you. Remember that my language is Spanish, if there is something badly written or poorly expressed it is because of the translator.

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evidence-based-activism · 3 months ago

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do you believe that men and women have inherent differences in their brain structure at birth and throughout life? and this does not imply superiority of one over another, merely differences in structure leading to different tendencies along a statistical distribution by gender. for instance women tend to have larger corpus collosums meaning better communication between hemispheres and emotional integration, while men tend to have higher visuospatial abilities which is explanatory for more men in fields like mechanical engineering. exceptions to the rule are the rule, so women can be aeronautical engineers and men can be heartfelt poets. The idea though is that we are born with natural tendencies.

on the individual level forgetting about gender momentarily, certain people are born with natural inclinations towards verbal or mathematical abilities that are notable in early childhood

i understand the top down society and roles change your brain idea which is absolutely true, so there is energy for change in the idea of abolishing gender roles, but do you disagree that there is any bottom up force? especially with (generally) a chromosome of difference between sexes?

Hi Anon!

Sex Differences in Adult Brains

This 2022 review [1] examines two large scale studies from 2021 [2-3]. These two studies both examined sex differences in the human brain, but came to different conclusions. The first [2] directly examined a large sample of brain scans and found small sex differences in many brain areas. In contrast, the second [3] performed a meta-synthesis of three decades of research "emphasizing meta-analyses and other large studies" and found sex differences in the brain are explained by differences in overall body size.

The review [1] I mentioned takes the stance that "differences in the mean value of largely overlapping distributions, and they show small-to-moderate effect sizes; however, we do not understand their microstructural basis, the causal factors shaping them, or if they facilitate sex differences or equivalences in behavior and cognition", essentially agreeing with the direct brain analysis [2] (but emphasizing the limitations of this finding) and suggesting that meta-analyses and reviews like [3] fail to find differences due to methodological heterogeneity.

In response to this, the authors of [3] released a response [4] in 2024 pointing out that while large scale studies do often find significant (but small) sex differences in the brain, they do not find consistent differences (i.e., one study may find brain area A is larger in males while another finds the same area is larger in females). In addition they note that large sample sizes inevitably "detect statistically significant interactions,including sex differences, of clinically trivial and meaningless magnitude” [emphasis mine].

Personally, I'm not sure if the distinction between "no sex differences once corrected for body size" vs "very small sex differences once corrected for body size" is really all that important. In either case, differences within each sex are larger than differences between each sex, suggesting that it is some other factor underlying the differences (if they do indeed exist).

Sex Differences in Children's Brains

In addition to the above, simply finding small sex differences also wouldn't tell us the cause of these differences. The above studies were based on adults, and – as you've acknowledged – there's a significant difference between how we treat female and male people in society. Given the brain's highly plastic (changeable, adaptable) nature, it's probable that observed differences could be the result of this socialization.

The idea, then, is to look for sex differences in very young children, who have not been exposed to such gendered socialization yet. For example, this study [5] suggests there are small differences in regional brain volumes at birth and this study [6] claims to find small sex differences in fetal brain connectivity.

However, the conclusion that these results support biological differences between the sexes relies on the assumption that there are no differences in socialization at these stages. Other work [7] suggests that this is not a fair assumption, showing that "women who learn the sex of their fetus before birth are engaging in gendered verbal interactions throughout pregnancy." Given that we know children's language [8] and social [9] development begin in the womb, this difference in treatment suggests that gendered socialization can also begin in the womb.

If Sex Differences Do Exist, Do They Matter?

Beyond this, there appears to be a general assumption that if small sex differences are found they are also relevant. However, there's no current consensus on how or why any proposed brain sex differences would produce observed sex differences in mental disorders or behaviors [3, 4].

This is important because it's not so much the existence of a difference than the relevance of a difference that interests people. What does it matter whether there's a sex difference in a brain region's volume if it isn't related to sex differences in behavior? We're concerned with sex differences in the body (e.g., sex differences in lung size) because they have an impact on some relevant factor in people's lives (e.g., equity in sports, differences in lung disease [10]); the same is true of our interest in the brain, so the fact that we don't see reliable sex-driven connections between brains and behavior suggests that any differences may not be of particular interest.

Sexual Dimorphism in the Body

And there are sex differences in the body. In fact, the article [4] points out that the one reliable sex difference in brains (overall volume difference) is smaller than similar size differences in other organs.

This article [11] discuss the underlying factors (genetics and hormones) for human sex differences. For a single system's example, this review [12] discusses "sex-influenced immune responses" and what specific relevance they have to understanding and treating human disease. The book Invisible Women [13] discuss many more sex differences, how much of society ignores these differences, and the negative effects this has on women.

All of this is to say that I actually wouldn't have been surprised to see sex differences in the human brain. (Although I would still point out the tenuous connections between brain and behavior.) That being said, current research suggests that sex is not a reliable determinant of brain anatomy or physiology.

Individual Predispositions

To address your question of predisposition: It is likely that individual predispositions (i.e., genetic predispositions) play a role in some behaviors and cognition (the nature part of nature and nurture).

However, current evidence indicates that these predisposition are unlikely to be linked to sex.

I hope this helps you! Let me know if you have follow up questions!

References below the cut:

DeCasien, A. R., Guma, E., Liu, S., & Raznahan, A. (2022). Sex differences in the human brain: a roadmap for more careful analysis and interpretation of a biological reality. Biology of Sex Differences, 13(1), 43.

Williams, C. M., Peyre, H., Toro, R., & Ramus, F. (2021). Neuroanatomical norms in the UK Biobank: The impact of allometric scaling, sex, and age. Human Brain Mapping, 42(14), 4623-4642.

Eliot, L., Ahmed, A., Khan, H., & Patel, J. (2021). Dump the “dimorphism”: Comprehensive synthesis of human brain studies reveals few male-female differences beyond size. Neuroscience & Biobehavioral Reviews, 125, 667-697.

Eliot, L. (2024). Remembering the null hypothesis when searching for brain sex differences. Biology of sex Differences, 15(1), 14.

Khan, Y. T., Tsompanidis, A., Radecki, M. A., Dorfschmidt, L., APEX Consortium, Austin, T., ... & Baron-Cohen, S. (2024). Sex Differences in Human Brain Structure at Birth. bioRxiv, 2024-06.

Wheelock, M. D., Hect, J. L., Hernandez-Andrade, E., Hassan, S. S., Romero, R., Eggebrecht, A. T., & Thomason, M. E. (2019). Sex differences in functional connectivity during fetal brain development. Developmental cognitive neuroscience, 36, 100632.

Barnes, M. W. (2015). Anticipatory socialization of pregnant women: Learning fetal sex and gendered interactions. Sociological perspectives, 58(2), 187-203.

Gervain, J. (2018). The role of prenatal experience in language development. Current opinion in behavioral sciences, 21, 62-67.

Castiello, U., Becchio, C., Zoia, S., Nelini, C., Sartori, L., Blason, L., ... & Gallese, V. (2010). Wired to be social: the ontogeny of human interaction. PloS one, 5(10), e13199.

Carey, M. A., Card, J. W., Voltz, J. W., Arbes Jr, S. J., Germolec, D. R., Korach, K. S., & Zeldin, D. C. (2007). It's all about sex: male-female differences in lung development and disease. Trends in endocrinology and metabolism: TEM, 18(8), 308.

Federman, D. D. (2006). The biology of human sex differences. New England Journal of Medicine, 354(14), 1507-1514.

Wilkinson, N. M., Chen, H. C., Lechner, M. G., & Su, M. A. (2022). Sex differences in immunity. Annual review of immunology, 40(1), 75-94.

Perez, C. C. (2019). Invisible women: Data bias in a world designed for men. Abrams.

#feminism #patriarchal culture #postmodernism

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talonabraxas · 7 months ago

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“Moirai” The Destiny Goddesses Talon Abraxas

Moirai: The Symbolism of Balance in a Mythological Triad

Origins of the Moirai The three Fates, Clotho, Lachesis, and Atropos share tasks between them to keep the peace and stability of the universe in Greek mythology.

Clotho

Clotho, depicted as the youngest of the triad, was responsible for weaving the thread of life. Hesiod describes her as the youngest of the triad. The goddess’ epithet was the Spinner and has been used to describe her for centuries. The epithet might have been used by Ancient Greeks themselves as a way to describe her role in controlling the threads of life or might have been introduced later by poets and scholars who sought to further clarify her role in mythology. Some works of art and literature depict Clotho using a spindle to weave the indestructible thread that determined the life and destiny of mankind.

In Pindar’s “Pythian Ode 9”, Clotho is a “child of night” who “spins the thread of life”, therefore highlighting her connection to the larger forces of the universe. Clotho was an agent of cosmic order; with her task of weaving the thread being essential to keeping the balance of the universe.

Clotho is not only known for her powers as one of The Fates, but also as a wise and just being. In the Orphic Hymns, she is described as “you who knows all things and arranges all things in order” (l. 38). She was also associated with the concept of time as the thread they spun represented the duration of a life. The thread of life that Clotho spun represented the concept of time in Greek mythology. The length of the thread represented the length of a person’s life, which was predetermined by the Moirai. In this way, Clotho’s role as the spinner of the thread of life was intricately tied to the concept of time and the duration of an individual’s life (Graves, 1992).

Her actions are tied to her two other sisters in the triad, as after spinning the thread, it was then handed to Lachesis and then Atropos.

Lachesis

Relief figure of moira Lachesis, Puteal de la Moncloa (M.A.N. Madrid), Luis García (Zaqarbal), May 2006, Wikimedia Commons

Lachesis was responsible for the second step in the process of weaving and threading a life. Hesiod describes Lachesis as being in the middle of the triad and as middle-aged. She was responsible for measuring the length of the thread of life, defining the quotas of happiness and misfortune. Her epithet was the Apportioner, which by the Free Dictionary, means to distribute or allocate proportionally; divide or assign. This is not to be confused with a portion, which means any part of any whole; segment, or section.

While Hesiod does not explicitly state Lachesis’ role as the apportioner, he does mention that the Fates “give to men at birth evil and good to have” (l. 904), therefore implying that they have some role in distributing fate.

Furthermore, some scholars have interpreted the term “Lachesis” itself as indicating an apportioning of some sort. The word “Lachesis” comes from the Greek verb “lachan” which means “to obtain by lot,” therefore leading some to speculate that Lachesis was responsible for assigning fates to individuals by drawing lots.

Lachesis is also depicted as a just and wise figure by Plato, who describes her as “one who orders the destiny of all things in their due measure” (Pl., Rep., Book x, 617a).

Atropos

Bas relief of Atropos cutting the thread of life, Tom Oates, Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 3.0, Wikimedia Commons

Atropos was the last member of the triad and was responsible for cutting the thread of life. In Hesiod’s Theogony, the goddess was depicted as the oldest and most feared and was described as “the one who, with other abandoned shears, ends the thread of life”(Hes., Theog., ll.907-908).

Atropos was often associated with death and endings and therefore had been mentioned with other gods relating to death like Thanatos and Hades in Homer’s Iliad (Homer, Book xvi, ll. 849-850), and also with the goddesses Nemesis and Eris(Talbert,2004, pg. 63-64), simply for the reason that they are all associated with death and/or finality. In Homer’s “Hymn to Aphrodite“, she is described as “she who puts an end to all things and is the most hateful to mortals” (Homer, ll. 56-57). which tells us that she carries out her duties with finality. According to some versions of the myth, Atropos is said to be the one that determines when one dies, while in others, she would only carry out the tasks assigned to her by her sisters. She is also the only one out of the triad who had an actual tool – her shears- unlike the other sisters whose tools were conjured from their epithets.

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9w1ft · 9 months ago

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my first thought of the album title was "dead poet's society" and i immediately thought of the character Neil and how his dad wasn't supportive of his creative hobby/implied queerness and the consequences of that..

it feels like an implication of how the public (swifties) wants to see her, forcing her into a role and how she is feeling about it.

maybe this is me being delulu, but the album name is so specific and so different from her other (usually very short) titles that it feels deliberate

i need to rewatch that movie! but i do remember neil!

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cowboylexapro · 2 years ago

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ok so you know how in the last episode of house, house askes someone “have you ever seen dead poets society?” which implies rsl exists the the house universe alongside wilson. i have come up with a theory.

either A, river phoenix got the role. (ethan said river wanted to be neil)

or B, my leading theory. rsl, neil, and wilson all are real living (2/3 or 1/3 at least) people in their own separate universe. so we have a universe where rsl plays both neil and wilson (this one), the house universe where wilson is a real person and rsl plays neil, the dps universe where neil is a real person and rsl plays wilson, and another non televised universe where neil and wilson are real people, but rsl doesn’t exist. we live in the only universe without neil and wilson as (1/2 of them) living and breathing people.

#ive gone insane #dead poets society #james wilson #doctor wilson #dr wilson #Neil Perry #Hate crimes md #house md

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andichoseyou · 6 months ago

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The Tortured Poets Department lyric analysis

"You left your typewriter at my apartment straight from the tortured poets department, I think some things I'll never say, like 'who uses typewriters anyway?'"

These lines establish a tone of romanticism and artistic struggle, referencing the cliche of the tortured poet and a nod to outdated technologies, which represent an attachment to the past or a more romanticized version of an artist's life.

Taylor secretly questions the practicality and authenticity of clinging to outdated symbols while also acknowledging her partner's self-destructive tendencies. The metaphor of throwing spikes down on the road implies intentional self-sabotage or creating obstacles in their path. Despite recognizing these patterns, she expresses affection, understanding, and a unique connection in which she believes she understands her partner better than anyone else.

"And who's gonna hold you like me? And who's gonna know you, if not me?"

These questions rhetorically emphasize her belief in her irreplaceable role in her partner's life.

"I laughed in your face and said 'You're not Dylan Thomas, I'm not Patti Smith, this ain't the Chelsea Hotel, we're modern idiots.'

And who's gonna hold you like me? Nobody. No-fucking-body. Nobody"

The first few lines, which particularly mention Dylan Thomas and Patti Smith, two iconic figures connected to the Chelsea Hotel, a well-known haven for artists, contrast their reality with the romanticized, idealized picture of bohemian artist lovers from the past. By referring to her and her partner as "modern idiots," Taylor satirically undermines this romanticization and suggests that she has a self-aware, if somewhat cynical, grounding in her less glamorous reality.

The chorus ends with a reaffirmation of her unique connection with her partner.

"You smoked then ate seven bars of chocolate, we declared Charlie Puth should be a bigger artist

I scratch your head, you fall asleep like a tattooed golden retriever"

The first line describes giving in to cravings or temptations, possibly during times of stress or vulnerability. The reference to Charlie Puth suggests a moment of happiness or connection through common interests. Mentioning a known but underrated artist hints at meaningful conversations and similar tastes that shape the relationship.

This second line shows strong affection, comparing the person to a happy, loyal dog. The tattoo suggests a unique or unusual personality underneath the happiness. (Or could really just mean the person she is singing about has tattoos)

"But you awaken with dread, pounding nails in your head"

Here, there's a stark shift to discomfort and anxiety, possibly hinting at inner turmoil or unresolved issues that disrupt the peace.

"But I've read this one where you come undone, I chose this cyclone with you"

These lines suggest understanding the partner's challenges and choosing to face a chaotic situation together, showing commitment despite the turbulence.

"And who's gonna hold you like me? (Who's gonna hold you? Who's gonna hold you?) No-fucking-body (Who's gonna hold you? Who's gonna hold you?) Nobody (Who's gonna hold you? Gonna love you? Gonna troll you?) Nobody"

Strongly declares uniqueness and irreplaceability in the relationship. Repetition underlines exclusivity and possessiveness, while "troll" adds a modern, playful, yet possibly negative touch. It shows that, despite flaws, their connection is special and cannot be matched by anyone else in terms of depth and understanding.

"Sometimes I wonder if you're gonna screw this up with me, but you told Lucy that you'd kill yourself if I ever leave, and I had said that to Jack about you so I felt seen

Everyone we know understands why it's meant to be, 'cause we're crazy"

The first line addresses a common worry in romantic relationships: that something one does or problems within the relationship could cause it to end, leading to feelings of insecurity and worry about what's ahead. Talking about how she and her partner discussed extreme measures like threatening self-harm if they break up shows a very unhealthy/toxic but strong bond. It openly shows their love entangled with fear of loss and desperation, which isn't healthy but deeply human.

She is comforted when she learns her partner has also expressed intense emotions about their relationship. This mutual intensity strengthens their connection, making them feel destined to be together due to their shared understanding and emotions.

"So tell me, who else is gonna know me?"

Suggest that their love is special and possibly isolating, asking "Who else is gonna know me?" shows a deep bond that cannot be matched or understood by others.

"At dinner you take my ring off my middle finger and put it on the one people put wedding rings on, and that's the closest I've come to my heart exploding"

The image of her partner putting a ring on her ring finger and the reference to her heart exploding because of it illustrate the depth of emotion and commitment between the pair, despite the struggles and uncertainties they face.

#the tortured poets department #ttpd #taylor swift #lyric analysis #tswiftlyrics #lyrics

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biiedwin8 · 9 months ago

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Maladaptive Daydreaming: How Can You Daydream in a healthy way?

Today, I'll be addressing the question of how to daydream in a healthy way without it interfering with your life. This is a beautiful question that often arises for individuals who are both daydreamers and creative individuals, such as writers, poets, or singers. When you observe others daydreaming or sharing beautiful stories, you may feel a sense of envy because you desire to have that creative outlet.

The challenge is finding a way to daydream in a healthy manner without it negatively impacting your life. The key is not to use daydreaming as an escape but rather as a source of pleasure. It's similar to someone enjoying one or two drinks without letting it interfere with their daily responsibilities. To daydream in a healthy way, you should indulge in it without neglecting your real-life responsibilities and emotions.

If you're feeling sad, embrace the sadness. If you need to cry, allow yourself to cry. When faced with homework or challenges, confront them head-on. Building confidence and facing the realities of life can help you use daydreaming as a form of pleasure or a creative outlet without it becoming an escape mechanism.

Being a maladaptive daydreamer doesn't imply insanity or psychopathy; it merely means you've used daydreaming to escape real-life issues. Over time, these issues may feel overwhelming, leading to a desire to hide from them. However, once you address the underlying issues and clear them from your unconscious mind, you'll realize that daydreaming is a habit you can manage.

Recognize that you are the person who started this habit, even if external circumstances or environment played a role. Taking back control means dealing with the underlying issues and using daydreaming for creative ventures joyfully, not as an escape. Once you regain control and manage it consciously, daydreaming can become a tool for creativity rather than a means of escaping reality.

Note from the Author

If you’re ready and you’d like my help with overcoming and managing your maladaptive daydreaming without spending years in therapy, then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.

#intrusive daydreaming #maladapting daydreaming disorder #actually madd #madd #imaginary friend #daydreaming #actually maladaptive #maladaptive daydreaming #obsessive daydreaming #immersive daydreaming

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backupanddoitagain · 1 year ago

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Incandescent

Image credit: @mondlevan

Summary: A short poem with some thoughts during your evening date with Peter Parker.

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Warnings: Implied reference to death

A/N: A short poem that came to mind while musing about TASM!Peter Parker. The significance of time fascinates me, and I couldn't resist the adjacency of the tradition of stopping the clocks when someone passes away and how we refer to 'stopping time' so that we may savor moments while we live. But as Gwen Stacy said, 'what makes life valuable is that it doesn't last forever.'

If you enjoy, please REBLOG. Please do not repost on other platforms, etc.

Incandescent

The night is young and so are we. The onset of fragility.

For when the stars come out to play, our eyes will meet but cannot say:

Will you stay until dark's gone? Will you linger til the dawn?

So little time have you to give. Stop the clock, I want to live.

No more hours here and there. No more chimes disturb the air.

In the silence forget the past. Live for the now, make it last.

Close your eyes to skies above, close your eyes and cherish love.

Additional exhaustive A/N below:

Forgive me for I'm not a poet, not even a lit major, but wth right?

As mentioned above, time and our perception of it is fascinating. At least to me. So is the subject of communication, both verbal and nonverbal. The piece above explores a date with Peter Parker in which neither is comfortable speaking their fears.

Relationships are as fragile as life itself and we frequently approach each other tentatively, especially in the early stages. Even when young and (somewhat) inexperienced, our life experiences have already shaped us into who we are in that moment with more to come in the future. So the Reader is asking a question (what now?), one that Peter himself may be asking as well. Each expresses themselves nonverbally with their eyes. Stars and eyes are frequently paired with couples. They have stars in their eyes or star-crossed lovers for two examples. The poem's title comes from the very *definition of the word incandescent: emitting visible light as a result of being heated. The contrast between light and dark, stars and space, and warmth (living) and death (cold) has been explored countless times in the arts and I won't be the last to dabble with it here.

The Reader knows that Peter's time is limited for a variety of reasons (the conflict of his dual roles, obligations, danger, etc) but also because everyone has a finite amount of time from birth to death and we know not how long that will be (life is fragile from the start). Peter gives Reader what time he can but is it enough? Reader knows this and doesn't want the reminder--the constant ticking of the seconds, the chiming of the hour--that time is passing.

Some viewers of the TASM franchise may have found the time symbolism in the movies too obvious, but I thought that it didn't hurt (me, the viewer) to have a reminder. Slowing down time to cherish others may the best we can hope for in lieu of stopping time, but when we take that time and hold onto it, it becomes ours forever in the form of memories, memories that are frozen in time.

*American Heritage Dictionary (5th ed). There are several definitions of the word, incandescent, and I selected one.

#tasm #peter parker #amazing spider-man #peter parker poetry #tasm fanfiction #peter parker x reader #peter parker fanfiction #tasm!peter parker

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capriclonus · 6 months ago

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Because of you, i read "Break you in my Image" by QueenMills. Im lapping up that angsty cycle of abuse. Chef kiss recommendation.

Would it be implied that its the 'canon" prequel to your DJ shart? If yes, will there be a switcheroo chap where shart is the sub to your Tav as her form of twisted nostalgia or idk?

*daily reminder that im cheering for your writing*

Okay so, FIRST OFF, you are so welcome. The author is an absolute poet and I mean it quite literally--their prose is blended with the lyricism of poetry; it is beautiful and evocative and powerful and poignant and ARGH I LOVE IT. Its a tragic story but so, so well written. For anyone curious this is the work the ask is referring to. I would recommend it to anyone (though its not for the faint of heart). I also have it linked in the A/N of chapter 2 of my oathbreaker fic.

Got a longer ramble here, so I'm going to add a page break.

In terms of my Oathbreaker fic, no, I would not say their work is a cannon prequel for multiple reasons:

Because QueenMills has never given permission for such a thing (and I haven't asked them!)

Because honestly? I hadn't thought about it!

The way Shar talks to Tav in my fic is directly inspired by the way Shar talks to Viconia-- but the real kicker there (and the genius of QueenMills' writing) is that we don't know that it is Shar talking to her. There are moments where you grasp that maybe, just maybe, this is Viconia's subconscious reaching out, talking to herself. If I had it as a cannon prequel, it would retcon and ruin how obscure and thoughtful that was. What I really love about that story is that, even though Shadowheart is the hero of the story, it isn't actually about her: its about Viconia, and her loss and pain and confusion, and reconciling her past in the previous BG games with her present in BG3.

Although it does fit very well with my DJ Shart, I'm not sure it's what I want for my version of the character. And I say that with the utmost respect for QueenMills' work. I seriously love it, and I think I'd be putting a lot of pressure on myself if I dared to consider even touching such a beautiful piece! It would also take away, I think, from the essence of QueenMills story.

I think what happened to Shadowheart at the cloister should, in my work, remain as ambiguous as it is in-game because I think it adds a lot to the true tragedy of her character: that, even though she's finally got what she wanted and has this discernable title to tell her who she is, she hasn't got what she wanted at all, and she has no idea who she is. She is in a constant turmoil of confusion and pain and, yes, happiness, and she doesn't know how they all fit together. All she knows is that Tav was the closest she ever got to feeling like she knew herself, to grasping the life she doesn't know she wants, and she cant let that go--let her go.

I'm rambling now, but I will just add that the role reversals of their dynamic is very much something I intend to play around with as the characters develop.

oh and thank you so much it means so so so much that you like and enjoy my writing and also this ask was brilliant I really appreciate you reaching out, thank you dearly and have a lovely day ^.^ I hope you like the next chapter of Oathbreaker when I release it.

#ao3 capriclonus #ao3 queenmills #bg3 shadowheart #dj shadowheart #just enough to hurt #ask box #i love people leaving asks for me #dark justiciar shadowheart #fic rec

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radianceholy · 1 month ago

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Owlcatober 2024 - Fake Names

Arueshalae engages in personal exploration through creative roleplay, with some unexpected company along the way. cw: some implied history of abuse, slightly flippant gender talk maybe, some alcohol use

His hair was short, trim, neat; he was a man of some means, perhaps, with all of the care taken to his appearance. His boots polished to a shine, the brass buttons of his doublet catching the flickering lamplight of a tavern edging ever closer to nightfall. Though it wasn’t the finest of material - nothing was, this close to the Worldwound, supply lines strained and any given luxury coming at a substantial premium - it was, perhaps, flattering. The look of a wandering poet, or maybe a fresh-faced merchant. Bright-eyed, slim, youthful. He was, no doubt, a stranger to these lands; an anomaly among the hardened veterans and knock-kneed recruits alike. He was, perhaps, uncertain if alcohol was to his taste, either. Wine, like fine fabrics, was rare enough; good wine ever more so, and he wasn’t so sure he knew to tell the difference, bringing the goblet to his lips as though its contents might just poison him. It was what one does in a tavern, though. What any mortal would do, certainly, provided that mortal wanted to be there in the first place. The question was, did he want to be there? “Studying the color of your drink, hm? Or transfixed by your own reflection? I can’t say it’s terribly hard on the eyes.” His gaze shot up, back straightening immediately, a familiar voice that put him on edge and made his heart jump into his throat. (No, jumping was good, right? Was it really jumping? Were those the right words for the feeling…?) He laughed. “My, my. You’re that flustered? That’s really not much of a challenge.” Daeran waved his hand, and it was hard to tell if he was dismissing him, or offering reassurance. “It’s dull here, with only the company of sub-par wine. And I’ve never seen your face around here before, so there's surely a measure of curiosity to be sated. But if you’d rather while away your hours gazing into your own eyes…" It was a feeling much more akin to anxiety, perhaps. It was’t as though he’d let a few unkind words sway him from his path (he often told himself that, again and again, like a prayer, hoping it would prove true), but he took no pleasure in mockery of his path. He couldn’t trust himself with anger or revenge, so those feelings had to be placed up on a high shelf in his mind. Not inaccessible, but far enough away that he wouldn’t reach for them the very moment something went wrong. It made it all the more upsetting that this man (the man that was now chatting him up) was the one that had decided to sit down, right at his side. Here, of all places. Tonight, of all nights.

…But right now, he wasn't that person, right? At least… for the role he was currently playing, he wasn’t the sort of demon that would be fun to tease and provoke. He didn't have to apologize for his own wickedness. “...I’m sorry. I’m… new here.” “Oh, that was established.” Daeran smirked, insufferable. It was a calculated twitch of his lips, to let him know that he was a huge asshole on purpose, and he really wasn’t quite sure why that should make a difference. Mortals are impossibly strange. “I know-! I know that you just said it, you know. It’s just that I’d rather say it myself,” he huffed, defiant, though that only seemed to earn him another laugh. “Callus. My name is… Callus.” “Indeed? And what, pray tell, has brought you to this den of misery? Idealistic enough to volunteer what limited means you have available to the Crusade?” “I suppose you could say that,” he murmured in reply. “I’m… a poet. From Mendev. I'm here to practice my art, on the subject of the Crusades themselves.”

“I would hate to see the grim prose you’ve spun from this dismal subject. Dedicate poem and verse to overstuffed Paladins and their lopped-off limbs, with tearful praise for their great sacrifice and honor in the face of impossible odds…" That didn't sound so bad to him, but Daeran said it like it was the most boring thing he could imagine. "Unless you’ve a sense of humor about it, I suppose. Throw in a bawdy limerick about Balors, perhaps?” “I don't think anyone would enjoy that. It would be considered a tasteless joke, at best.” “Yes, it would. Naturally, I’d pay handsomely, as a patron of the arts.” He pouted. “...I just wanted to see a different perspective of the Crusaders. Something closer to them. Not mock them.” “Different, you say? Different from what? Parades and preachers? Wide scale recruitment of the idealistic and foolish alike?” He grinned, leaning in, close enough that the room seemed to fade but for his gaze. “You're much too vibrant to waste whatever talents might be at your disposal on that. I, on the other hand, could offer far more stimulating subject matter.” His eyes opened a bit wider. He had never seen his face this close before. His eyes were bright. Warm. They reminded her of that beautiful song, and the flights of butterflies. He knew Daeran quite well, in their travels - he’d said a hundred wretched things to him a hundred times over each, always with this awful tone of detached mockery. Sosiel often said that anything good or beautiful in the world becomes foul through the eyes of the Count. The smug mockery, pressing his boot against the back of someone at the edge of a cliff as though it were the most delightful of jokes; the gentle warmth of someone who felt he might be among equals, sharing in delight with one another, however fleeting it might be. Or, perhaps, willing to humble himself however briefly to give that impression. It’s what he’d have done, as a succubus. He knew that trick. He knew it. And even so, in his eyes– “In all of Elysium,” he whispered, “there’s truly nothing more beautiful. No one, nothing.” He trembled, stroking her cheek and tracing her chin with his delicate fingertips. His face was pale, sickly. He looked like he might just throw up on the spot, but the gentle smile was as genuine as ever.She had, of course, poisoned his drink. She could recognize it instantly. Her insides twisted and burned. Her body twitched, and for once, she couldn’t find the words. No twisted ultimatums or wicked lies. No cruelty could spring forth from her lips. It was the first time he’d ever poisoned hers, in turn.He wrenched his gaze away all too suddenly. Any trace of comfortable mirth was gone. He felt sick.

“Oh? Here I thought we were getting along. I suppose I must have offended. And I wasn’t even trying all that hard to do so.” “No. No, no, I’m sorry. It’s not you.” Daeran leaned away, and he felt like he could breathe once more. A knot of guilt twisted in his stomach, but that was nothing new. “I suppose there’s such a thing as coming on too strong.” “...You reminded me of someone. Um, I guess… an old boyfriend.” “Now that would explain it. And it does spare my ego for a turn, so all the better for it. The wound is still fresh, is it?” “You could say that,” he said, voice small. “Well, well. I’ll leave you to your night, in that case. But should you be compelled to look me up again, say, when it becomes more of a scab, my name is–” “Count Daeran Arendae,” another chimed in. (Mortals use full names and titles when they’re upset with one another, he knew. But only sometimes. How confusing!) He flicked his gaze towards the new voice a little too quickly, forgetting himself. (A mortal shouldn’t act like a frightened fawn, should they? And he’s a friend. Maybe not Callus’ friend, but… wait, Was Sosiel his friend? He should really ask–) “It’s no surprise to find you here, haranguing a newcomer. Can’t you see how overwhelmed he is?” He scoffed. “I am nothing if not perfectly accommodating of the gentleman’s boundaries!” “He obviously doesn’t know you well enough, if he believes such a blatant lie. You’ve clearly upset him.” “For a priest so transfixed with beauty and inner goodness, you are remarkably unforgiving and dour, aren’t you? I’m almost proud to bear witness to your overbearing hypocrisy, day after day.” “It's okay,” He said, softly. ‘Callus,’ the name. It didn’t fit. It really didn’t fit. He wasn’t really a poet from Avistan, and– “...Daeran did nothing wrong,” he sighed, despite the smug ‘Ha!’ that came just from his right. “...I owe you an apology, then. The look on his face was simply…” “...Oh, don't act so contrite. I’m sure you were pleased as ever to come in on your high horse.” “And– and my name,” he continued, despite the bickering. “...I’m not Callus.” Both men glanced back at him. “...You know, a false name doesn’t have much meaning if you're someone I’ve never met before in my life.”

Sosiel shot a glance towards Daeran, and then another towards Arueshalae. A look of understanding crossed his face… much, it seemed, to Daeran’s annoyance. Silence lingered between them all for a few moments.

“Naturally, I expect thanks,” Daeran hummed. “For my role as muse and inspiration in this whole performance.”

“A performance, really?” Sosiel interjected.

“It’s all performance,” he shot back.

Arueshalae adjusted his collar, letting out a sigh. “Even if I doubt it was your intention, you did give me the idea.”

“As disappointed as I am,” he mused.

Sosiel shot him another glare, resting a hand on Arueshalae’s shoulder. “...I’m sure you must have been nervous. And I am glad that the count truly did respect your boundaries,” spoken as a warning and eliciting an eyeroll, “and I wanted to assure you that nothing but good can come of exploring yourself in such a way. Find the beauty within yourself, and share it with the world.” He smiled warmly.

“...It was still based on a lie,” he replied. “I’m not a poet.” He wrapped his arms around his waist, hugging himself. He was as skilled at changing form as ever, but despite despite his skill in doing so, his tail had reappeared behind him once more, swaying and twitching to betray his feelings.

“I’m sure that you could learn. And I’m sure that the world would be better with your poetry in it, regardless of your precise origins.”

“Well, then-!” Daeran rose to his feet, the sincerity repelling his presence as sharply as ever. “It is, unfortunately for me, a night wasted. I’ll have to be wary of every willowy gentleman I come across from here on out, and that’s certainly going to cut into my personal time–”

“Wait!” Arueshalae spoke up. His horns had grown in the span of a moment, without even realizing it. “Ah… thank you.” He murmured.

“Really? No one’s ever embarrassed themself before you, I suppose? That seems unlikely.”

“...No. No, not that. No one’s ever–” he rubbed his arm, still hugging himself. “–no one’s ever backed off so willingly. I suppose it made things more pleasant than I expected.”

He looked, for once, like he was taken aback, an acerbic word choked to silence in the back of his throat. He let out a dramatic little sigh, some effort at saving face, and he was soon gone, leaving Arueshelae behind with Sosiel.

Sosiel offered a hand to Arueshalae, and he took it, rising up beside him. Hunched in on himself, his wings – there they were again – folded in as close to his sides as they could, a protective shelter. “This place is rather crowded, isn’t it?” He offered gently, gesturing towards the door.

“...It is.”

“Would you like to talk? I can provide what guidance I can, of course, but we need not speak in absolutes."

He nodded.

The sun had dipped below the horizon, the last light of the day beginning to fade. The stars above would soon be clear, ready to offer guidance, as they always had. The weather was chill, and in the beauty of night, the world felt more calm and still than it ever had before. Somewhere in the darkness, there was an answer to that elusive question.

Who are you, Arueshalae?

#owlcatober 2024 #pathfinder wrath of the righteous #arueshalae #daeran arendae #sosiel vaenic #inspired by that one camp banter #genderrrrrr

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religion-is-a-mental-illness · 4 months ago

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By: Julian Adorney, Mark Johnson and Geoff Laughton

Published: Jun 18, 2024

First, a disclaimer: Many people believe that queer theory is focused on LGBT rights. This is not true. Queer theory is not about granting LGBT people rights; it typically engages with this group primarily because homosexuality has long been considered abnormal. Instead, queer theory grounds itself in opposition to whatever society perceives as “normal.”

This is a crucial distinction, particularly as we discuss the impact of queer theory on children. It would be a grave mistake to infer that our discussion implies opposition to LGB youth. Indeed, if all that queer theorists did was tell non-heterosexual people, “It’s okay that you’re lesbian/gay/bisexual; never be ashamed of who you love or of which consenting adults you choose to date,” then we wouldn’t be writing this article.

Queer theory is on the rise, especially among young people. Increasingly, young Americans are identifying as “genderqueer” or “genderfluid.” In their book Queer Theory, Gender Theory: An Instant Primer, queer theorist Riki Wilchins proudly argues that young people “have pushed the dialog on gender in new and unanticipated directions.” “As the barriers to gender-expansive behavior continue to fall,” Wilchins proclaims, “at least in more progressive areas, increasing numbers of them [young people] are coming out as nonbinary, genderequeer [sic], genderfluid, and a host of other new ‘micro-identities’ for which language is still being created.” A 2023 survey found that only 57 percent of Generation Z respondents agreed with the statement that there are only two genders.

But why is queer theory increasingly being adopted by young people? Is this adoption a good thing? Does it help them to live their highest and best lives? And, if the widespread adoption of queer theory is generally not helpful for young people, what can we do about it? These are the questions that we will set out to answer in this piece.

First, why does queer theory appeal to so many young people? This is the simplest piece of the puzzle. Queer theory positions itself in opposition to the normal. For queer theory, what is considered “normal” in society is actually oppressive, and true freedom requires breaking out of these oppressive norms. As queer theorist David Halperin writes in his book Saint Foucault, “Queer is by definition whatever is at odds with the normal, the legitimate, the dominant.”

The notion of society as an oppressive paradigm that must be opposed appeals to many young people who feel disenfranchised by the current social order. Poet Steve Taylor captured the essence of modern malaise in his poem “It’s hard to be a human being.”

It’s hard to be a human being when the world is so chaotic that you can’t find your right direction can’t find a life that aligns with your inner purpose and you feel inauthentic and unfulfilled like an actor who hates the role he plays.

Washington Post reporter Taylor Lorenz addressed this discontent less poetically but perhaps more bluntly. She tweeted, “we’re living in a late stage capitalist hellscape during an ongoing deadly pandemic w[ith] record wealth inequality, no social safety net/job security, as climate change cooks the world.”

Young people feel increasingly scared and disaffected, and it’s hardly surprising. They are constantly told that they inhabit the worst of all possible worlds, a world so bad that it would amount to child abuse for them to bring their own children into it (as one CNBC piece put it, ��A growing number of people are reluctant to bring a child into a world that’s set to be ravaged by climate change in the coming decades”). Moreover, they spend more time on social media than any previous generation—over 3 hours per day, according to one report. This exposure relentlessly bludgeons them with every global issue and portrays many of their fellow humans as monsters.

They’re also being raised in an environment that is more online and offers fewer opportunities for in-person bonding than any previous generation. A 2018 Adobe report focused on the United Kingdom found that members of Generation Z spent a staggering 10.6 hours per day engaging with online content. After accounting for sleep, that doesn’t leave much time for cultivating in-person relationships. And it shows: a January 2020 study by Cigna found that 73 percent of Generation Zers reported sometimes or always feeling lonely. And that was before a global pandemic shut us all in our homes and conditioned us to view each other primarily as potential sources of infection for two years.

Relatedly, fewer and fewer young Americans are being given opportunities to find themselves. Social psychologist Jonathan Haidt and Greg Lukianoff, president of the Foundation for Individual Rights and Expression (FIRE), discuss in their book The Coddling of the American Mind how young people are increasingly sheltered from risk and exploration. They engage less in free play and more in activities under the stultifying thumbs of well-meaning authority figures. Piano recitals have replaced climbing trees, and games carefully orchestrated by adults have supplanted spontaneous play, where children come together to decide their activities and explore who they are. This is a problem because brains, especially young ones, need obstacles and risks and opportunities in order to fully develop. As the authors write:

The genes get the ball rolling on the first draft of the brain, but the brain is “expecting” the child to engage in thousands of hours of play—including thousands of falls, scrapes, conflicts, insults, alliances, betrayals, status competitions, and acts of exclusion—in order to develop. Children who are deprived of play are less likely to develop into physically and socially competent teens and adults.

All of this is showing up in the data on young Americans’ mental health. An alarming 42 percent of Generation Zers have been diagnosed with a mental health condition, and an astounding 60 percent report using medication to manage their mental health.

Part and parcel to this, queer theory offers struggling young people an easy way out. If you are lonely and struggling with anxiety, it is much easier to adopt an ideology that attributes these conditions to society at large than undertake the difficult (but ultimately more rewarding) personal journey to address them. Queer theory offers a seductive escape, which, despite its appeal, is ultimately destructive.

So, lots of young Americans are lonely, adrift, scared, and depressed. Fewer and fewer know their true selves, which certainly predisposes them to have an interest in queer theory. If we had spent our entire lives feeling lonely and disaffected and scared and anxious, we would be drawn to a theory that challenges everything considered “normal” too.

But can queer theory actually help young people? There are certainly edge cases where it can. Some people feel miserable trying to fit into binary masculine and feminine social norms (the so-called “gender binary”) and feel relief when told that they do not have to. While they could get this same relief from a liberal social order that tells everyone to be themselves without shame, it’s possible that some individuals first experienced this relief via a queer-theory-educated teacher. We want to acknowledge that queer theorist educators can do some good, even though theirs’ certainly isn't the only (or best) game in town to help marginalized young people. Nevertheless, queer theory may also be making the lives of many young people worse. We posit three reasons.

First, queer theory completely rejects the notion of a stable or transcendent Self. As Michel Foucault, one of the intellectual grandfathers of queer theory, wrote, “Nothing in man—not even his body—is sufficiently stable to serve as the basis for self-recognition or for understanding other men.” Wilchins talks about the “impossibility of identity.”

Why do queer theorists reject the idea that we have an intrinsic Self, a true identity that can serve as the foundation upon which to build the house of our lives? Because, for queer theorists, we are all merely products of the culture around us. Wilchins quotes Foucault: “The individual…is not the vis-à-vis of power; it is, I believe, one of its prime effects.” That is, the power of our surrounding culture doesn’t just shape us; it absolutely makes and defines us. We are nothing but a cultural construction made by the dominant paradigm in which we live. Or as Wilchins explains:

We assume the Self is transcendent—it just exists, constant and universal. And we reason from there. It was exactly this certainty that Foucault wanted to attack…Foucault understood how we think of the Self as constructed, no less a cultural artifact than a vase, a chair, or a building.

For the queer theorist, there is no meaningful sense of self. We are merely the product of the power discourses of our culture. There is nothing deeper or more intrinsic to us than that; we are simply “cultural artifacts” like a chair or a building.

The danger of this ideology is hard to overstate. Queer theory takes marginalized young people, who already feel that their house is built on a foundation of sand, and tells them that even the sand is an illusion. In fact, they’re led to believe that everything is an illusion, and they must therefore build their house on empty air.

The second reason that queer theory might hurt the mental and emotional development of young Americans is by disconnecting us from our ancestors and the rest of humanity. As two of us (Julian and Mark) wrote for the Foundation Against Intolerance and Racism:

...among their list of 72 genders, MedicineNet lists “Egogender.” What is egogender? “It is a personal type of gender identified by the individual alone. It is based on the person’s experience within the self.” MedicineNet also lists “Cloudgender: The person’s gender cannot be comprehended or understood due to depersonalization and derealization disorder.” This ideology tells people who already feel alone or isolated that any attempt to connect with others is hopeless, for their immutable characteristics (in this case, gender) make it impossible. A core part of an individual cannot be “comprehended,” “identified,” or “understood” by anyone else.

Even apart from egogender and cloudgender, the proliferation of new gender identities risks isolating adherents off from almost every human who has ever lived. If someone identifies as “Agender”—defined as “a person who does not identify themselves with or experience any gender”—they cannot look back through history to find other agender individuals who achieved great things and feel a connection to them because this gender identity has only recently emerged. A core aim of affirmative action is to show marginalized individuals that people like them (or, at least, who share their immutable characteristics) have accomplished significant feats, suggesting they can do the same. Conversely, queer theory may teach young people that no one like them has achieved notable things—or that there is no one like them at all. For a generation in the midst of a loneliness epidemic, this is unlikely to help.

The third reason that queer theory might be hurting marginalized young people is more direct: some queer theorists deliberately attempt to provoke emotional crises in students. Kevin Kumashiro, in a paper published by the Harvard Educational Review, discusses his experiences as both a classroom teacher and a professor of prospective teachers. He argues that exposure to queer theory can induce negative emotions in some students.

Repeating what is already learned can be comforting and therefore desirable; students’ learning things that question their knowledge and identities can be emotionally upsetting. For example, suppose students think society is meritocratic but learn that it is racist, or think that they themselves are not contributing to homophobia but learn that in fact they are. In such situations, students learn that the ways they think and act are not only limited but also oppressive. Learning about oppression and about the ways they often unknowingly comply with oppression can lead students to feel paralyzed with anger, sadness, anxiety, and guilt; it can lead to a form of emotional crisis.

Kumashiro does not share this observation as a caution against teaching queer theory. Instead, for Kumashiro, the goal is to steer students into these crises. He recognizes that some teachers may be uncomfortable with deliberately inducing such crises in students. However, he argues that concerns for students' emotional well-being are misplaced. According to Kumashiro, what really matters is that students learn to adopt the tenets of queer theory, whatever the emotional cost.

Not surprisingly, some educators choose not to teach such information or to lead students to uncomfortable places. In fact, in response to my presentations on anti-oppressive education in conferences and classrooms, university educators and students have questioned whether it is even ethical to knowingly lead students into possible crisis by teaching things that we expect will make them upset. Felman (1995) suggests that learning through crisis is not only ethical, but also necessary when working against oppression. What is unethical, she suggests, is leaving students in such harmful repetition….Therefore, educators have a responsibility…to draw students into a possible crisis.

Why would a teacher intentionally induce emotional crises in their students? Because, as Felman argues, this approach is preferable to allowing students to independently form opinions that may diverge from those of their queer theorist educators. Kumashiro acknowledges that such a crisis can lead a student in several directions: “some that may lead to anti-oppressive change, others that may lead to more entrenched resistance.” However, he believes there is only one correct path: towards anti-oppressive change; that is, adopting the tenets of queer theory. That’s why educators “have a responsibility” not only to precipitate these crises but also to “structure experiences that can help them work through their crises productively.” Once a student’s views are broken down, they must be built back up into the desired framework. If the cost of all of this is that students are “paralyzed with anger, sadness, anxiety, and guilt,” well, so be it.

This might be starting to show up in data on young peoples’ mental health. A 2021 study by Catherine Gimbrone, Lisa Bates, Seth Prins, and Katherine Keyes, titled “The politics of depression: Diverging trends in internalizing symptoms among US adolescents by political beliefs,” surveyed 12th graders every year from 2005 to 2018, and broke up the results by political ideology. Starting in the early 2010s, depression rates among liberal 12th graders started to rise significantly (conservative 12th graders also experienced an increase in depression, albeit at a slower rate, suggesting a possible role for political ideology). As noted by liberal sociologist Musa al-Gharbi, this uptick correlates with the onset of the so-called “Great Awokening.”

[ Source: Why are young liberals so depressed? - by Matthew Yglesias (slowboring.com) ]

A 2020 Pew survey asked Americans, “Has a doctor or healthcare provider EVER told you that you have a mental health condition?” Over 50 percent of young (age 18-29) liberal women, and over 30 percent of young liberal men, answered in the affirmative. For young conservatives, the numbers are just over 20 percent and over 10 percent, respectively.

[ Source: How to Understand the Well-Being Gap between Liberals and Conservatives - American Affairs Journal ]

Young liberals are those most likely to be influenced by the tenets of queer theory. Clearly, there’s a lot going on with teen mental health, and any decline in mental health within a group is going to have multiple causes, few of which are directly related to a teacher’s ideology or the extent to which students adopt that ideology. However, we should be open to the idea that when queer theory teachers express a desire to induce feelings of guilt and anxiety in their students, they may be succeeding. As al-Gharbi puts it, “to the extent that certain strains of liberal ideology push adherents to perceive people and phenomena as racist, sexist, homophobic, etc.—when they otherwise would not have—this shift can predictably lead to increased levels of anxiety, depression, and other disorders.”

An important caveat accompanies the above discussion: our critique targets the ideology of queer theory, not the individuals who advocate for it. While it’s true that some people across all ideologies may simply want to harm others—and such individuals may be proportionately or even disproportionately represented among educators who teach queer theory—we also recognize people like Riki Wilchins, who (though Julian has taken aim squarely at their ideology in the past) do seem sincere in their desire to help young people at the margins of society. We believe that most proponents of nearly every ideology want to make the world a better place, and this includes most queer theorists. However, regardless of their intentions, queer theory as an ideology seems likely to make young peoples’ lives worse.

So, queer theory draws marginalized students in, and may make many of them feel worse. Fine. But what can we do about it?

First, it’s important not to shame young Americans who endorse queer theory. These are people who are already marginalized, perceiving themselves as victims of an unjust system. Rarely are star athletes or prom queens drawn to a belief system that labels conventional norms as oppressive. These young people do not need to be kicked further while they’re down.

Consider the case of Veronica Garcia, trans-identified male high school athlete who who faced a barrage of criticism on social media after winning first place at the state track and field championships. All three of us hold strong opinions against biological males (even post-transition) competing in female-only sports. But even so, Garcia was only 16 at the time. Attacking Garcia personally will only reinforce their belief that mainstream society is oppressive and is unlikely to spur a reassessment of the foundational claims of queer theory.

While holding firm to important lines regarding who should be allowed to compete in female sports, we should nonetheless treat Garcia with kindness rather than contempt. Viewing Garcia as a vulnerable young person seeking stability allows us to provide the necessary support.

This isn’t just basic decency; it’s also strategically powerful. In his book How Minds Change, David McRaney discusses how people in insular groups are persuaded to leave the group and their toxic beliefs behind. He shares stories of 9/11 Truthers who saw the light and former members of Westboro Baptist Church who found the courage to leave. One key to changing these folks’ hearts, he insists, was how they were treated by the outside world. What truly prompted them to abandon their isolated and fearful worldview were “counterarguments wrapped in kindness.”

McRaney stresses that humans are social creatures with a chief desire to belong. The Westboro Baptist Church, despite its many flaws, offers a sense of belonging to its adherents. So does queer theory. So do regular churches. However, the key to encouraging someone to leave one community is to offer them another welcoming community to join. Leave your own community and spend your life adrift in the wilderness is not a compelling offer. Leave your own community and come join ours, we would love to have you! is. Or, as Mcraney puts it, the people in these cults “couldn’t leave their worldviews behind until they felt like there was a community on the outside that would welcome them into theirs.”

This is particularly potent with queer theory, which attracts marginalized people to it by asserting that mainstream society hates and oppresses them. Showering adherents with contempt is only going to reify their beliefs. If we want to weaken their ideology, our best weapon is kindness.

One way to do this is by helping young Americans who have embraced queer theory find their actual identities. Queer theory takes struggling young people and tells them that there is no self to find. We can counter this by offering a message of hope: everyone has a true identity. It is the deepest and most transcendent part of us, the part that was there when we were knit together in our mothers’ womb and that will persist until we take our dying breath. It can be seen in our purpose and our highest calling, in what lights us up and makes us feel truly alive. It is the foundational essence of us, the one thing that cannot be stripped away even if we lose everything else.

Various spiritual and non-spiritual traditions refer to this core self differently: your True Identity, your highest self, your connection to God. We are not here to convert anyone to any particular worldview; the concept is universal (at The Undaunted Man, Mark and Geoff refer to this true self as simply Self 2). But once you tap into and identify with your true self, the foundation of your life can be built on rock rather than on sand. More to the point when it comes to queer theory: once we find our true identity, the allure of an ideology that posits no meaningful self loses all appeal and is seen as transparently misguided.

Queer theory often takes young people who are suffering, (generally) tries to help them, and (generally) makes them worse. However, if we can view these young Americans as people who are hurt, scared, lonely, and adrift, and if we can offer them open arms instead of a raised fist, we might just provide the help they truly need.

About the Authors

Julian Adorney is a columnist at Reality's Last Stand and the founder of Heal the West, a substack movement dedicated to preserving liberalism. He’s also a writer for the Foundation Against Intolerance and Racism (FAIR). Find him on X: @Julian_Liberty.

Mark Johnson is a trusted advisor and executive coach at Pioneering Leadership and a facilitator and spiritual men's coach at The Undaunted Man. He has over 25 years of experience optimizing people and companies—he writes at The Undaunted Man’s Substack and Universal Principles.

Geoff is a Relationship Architect/Coach, multiple-International Best-Selling Author, Speaker, and Workshop Leader. He has spent the last twenty-six years coaching people world-wide, with a particular passion for supporting those in relationship, and helping men from all walks of life step up to their true potential. Along with Mark, he is a co-founder of The Undaunted Man.

#Julian Adorney #Mark Johnson #Geoff Laughton #queer theory #gender ideology #gender identity #gender identity ideology #depression #mental health #mental health issues #religion is a mental illness

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