#the past is behind me now
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I'm glad I designed Sam to always be wearing a suit now that it's been revealed that he used to work at a lawfirm because I used to work at a lawfirm and that experience of switching career paths and now you're left with so many suits that you can't even wear in your new job lest people think you're "overexaggerating" is such a very specific mood
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Espeon, Dusk Lycanroc, and Sylveon ko-fi doodle for Kaitlyn!
I'm accepting pokemon ko-fi doodle requests here! ✨
#artists on tumblr#pokemon#espeon#dusk lycanroc#sylveon#gotchibam arts#ko-fi doodle#thank you sm for the request!! <3#i'm sorry this took so long ;_;#been having an art block for the past week so I couldn't finish any doodle#I think i'm getting back to it now tho esp. since the weather here is cooler now#w/c helps a lot (the past days has been terribly hot so yeah)#anyways i'll get back to ppl's msgs soon!!#also need to update stuff for my kofi members >_<#i'm getting behind a lot of stuff but I hope u guys can be patient w/ me ;o;
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im a child of divorce
#the bit is over when i say its over and even when its so joever for these two its not over for me!!! (once again i am on heavy copium)#anyway. thoughts behind the spoiler tags#gempearl#shiny duo#wild life smp#life series spoilers#wild life spoilers#i feel like. i actually was expecting that#no but its so funny the one time the negative consequences of something does actually get acknowledged its the SL finale ‘betrayal’/j#like cmon fuck me i guess/j (BIG EMPHASIS. ON THE SLASH J. OKAY.)#but honestly though i did expect Gem to hold a grudge over the 2v1 in SL. and. its good that there are consequences???#it IS a ‘betrayal’ in Gem’s eyes. they were friends. they were murder besties for the last two sessions and then Pearl chose Scar over her#and its awesome man. [through gritted teeth] this is awesome man this will be good for character development ok ok ok. ok?#its also got something to do with Pearl having the red creep in. i think#because during SL Gem was like. nearly idolising the Scarlet Pearl persona while vaguely aware that her own reputation has a similar effect#and yknow. the horrors. the fact that their image is so heavily built on what others deem them to be and they can only play into it#but by the end of SL Gem gets ‘betrayed’ by this persona that she looked up to#and also her own ‘GeminiSlay’ intimidating image is also starting to fall apart. partly of her own will#and now shes watching Pearl slowly turn red again. and this time she knows its not good for her or Pearl#so shes distancing herself from it. shes ‘trying to fix her reputation’. she sees Pearl falling into it again and just. no. i dont love you#you betrayed me last season#but on Pearl’s end of things she’s already deep into the idea that as long as you say you ‘forgive’ someone then everything thats happened#in the past doesn’t matter and they can all be friends. and nooo absolutely no grudges will be held. no emotional repression here#so. because thats happened to her in her own team she thinks the same can happen with her and Gem#and thats so. im going to blow myself up now
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Idk what to focus on sweater Chuuya or hot Mori or flannel Aku or the fact that they all look genuinely happy or-
#lowkey chuuya is making me think of the song sweater weather and idk whether to cry or go feral#animate said “happy fall” in the most gorgeous way possible#they all look so happy🥺#also guys sorry ive been MIA the past few weeks#i got into one of the best universities in my country via transfer and i only just moved in a couple weeks ago#chuuya is making me think of the song sweater weather and now im about to either cry or go feral#so ive been a couple episodes behind on the anime#which BLOWS bc the chapter 101 adaption got released on my bday#bungou stray dogs#bsd#bungo stray dogs#bsd anime#ougai mori#mori ogai#mori ougai#bsd mori#chuya nakahara#chuuya nakahara#bsd chuuya#chuuya#bungou stray dogs chuuya#nakahara chūya#ryuunosuke akutagawa#akutagawa ryuunosuke#akutagawa#bsd akutagawa#bsd elise
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Guilt
#To be clear I don't hate Ford#I DO however think he was absolutely haunted by his past mistakes after Weirdmaggedon#He probably felt like he let down the little kid he used to be#The one who'd do anything for his brother#Emotionally stunted and traumatized old man that he is#With his hero complex gone he doesn't have anything to hide behind#Alright alright analysis over#my art#animation#young ford pines#ford pines#stanford pines#gravity falls#The Filbrick and Ford parallels directly post return will never not slay me </3#Anyway that's why we can't see his eyes in the first few frames#Okay now I'm actually done#character analysis
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limutuals another poll
part of a new series of limbus polls i think reblogs with your answers and such would be appreciated :>
#kay posting#limbus company#pollblr#poll#tumblr polls#I think i would be gloom#not bc oh boohoo i am so sad but bc i think it fits#other gloom base egops are ishmael and rodya and honglu#all very mecore#based off their storys from what we've seen it also fits me as a person#ill admit that at first i was one of the canto 2 didnt matter losers before tkt but now that we(i) know more#she is quite me fr#(i didnt plan all of this before making the poll but thinking about it all it fits in quite nicely)#like like#with all that we saw in tkt it starts to fit in more that her ego is gloom despite how cheery she gives off ykyk?#with sonya and being left behind and all that#and now ishmael#based off of how she was for most of canto 5 youd think shed be wrath but#i think that it being gloom is an important distinction esp with the end of her canto#cause like it isnt just wrath and anger towards ahab as it seems but more gloom towards the whole situation and at the end of the canto#we see her be the bigger person and see past the wrath and revenge leaving the gloom ykyk?#maybe i am just pulling all of this way out of my ass#and yeah i gave this like no thought but ne ways#and honglu is me fr bc he is silly and whimsical#anyways anyways i would be gloom#kay goes blah blah blah
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Wait scrappy is bonded to one of the gang right?
Which one is it? Or is it all of them. Personally I hoping it's Fred.
This is a fun story actually!
Back before the gang were all romantically together the entire Rogers clan was keeping an eye on Scrapy to see who he would bond with. There were no Rogers of bonding age for him to pair with so they all thought he was destined to be a Doo by adoption (when someone gains a Doo by being adopted into the Rogers clan) or a Doo by Marriage (where a Doo bonds with a non-Roger that is destined to marry into the family).
When I tell you Shaggy was Struggling™ because it looked like he was going to bond with Fred (he even started coping his speech patterns and saying “treasure” like that) only to turn around and attach his tiny puppy self to Daphne for months only to turn around again and go with Velma to her NASA internship as emotional support…
Let’s say Shaggy was very confused and just a bit frustrated.
But it turned out to be just the curiosity and friendliness of young puppies. Scrappy has found his Rogers not that long ago in 2011 when they found Cousin Steve on that iceberg.
#scooby gang#scooby doo#shaggy rogers#scrappy doo#steve rogers#the rogers family au!#also cousin Steve didn’t return to the past are you kidding me?#why would he leave his friends and family behind?#he can’t go back his life is here now#he spent years unbonded with no Doo to be his friend#Scrappy was waiting for him here#and after Scrappy nearly went bondeless crazy that one time and kidnapped a whole island to try to create a bond with ANYONE#by using dark soul magic and keeping Mr Mondavarious locked in the basement#it you be really cruel of him leave the little pup#don’t worry Scrappy apologized about the whole ‘keeping Mr Emile in a basement for months and turning his amusement park into a demon trap’#he is doing some community service in Spooky Island and going to therapy now#Steve and the family are very proud of him
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Dipper's got a little more... bite in some of the early drafts of the AU, I've been seriously tempted to lean that way again as I've grown to better understand what kind of story I want to tell with him.
Thoughts bellow the cut...
He skipped a grade, he's got the best grades in his class, he's "the gifted kid who's going places". Finding out that magic is real is the ultimate wish fulfillment of this nerdy little kid and the proof for that little inside voice of his that he's not just smart, he's special.
He's a good kid, but one who's been told how smart and mature he is one too many times. Unlike Norman, he hasn't spent his entire life being told that he's wrong for being different; Dipper's got the confidence to demand answers when with faced with something he doesn't understand.
There's probably not a world where Dipper starts bullying Norman, Norman's too good at keeping his head down and would never confront Dipper. But Norman has something Dipper needs and there are the ingredients for a very unhealthy friendship, if Dipper doesn't lean to see Norman as an equal and Norman doesn't learn to stand up for himself.
Of course, that's what the rest of the story is for.
Enough of the heavy character stuff, since you read this far you've earned yourself some of that sweet sweet Parapines content that I know you're all here for.
Art by @flipsidered
#danny phantom#gravity falls#paranorman#Masters’ Academy AU#I realized I had some unposted AU concept art and commissions I got just for fun#it has been a while since I posted real stuff#but it's past midnight here and I really shouldn't start posting right now#so you'll have to settle for this little peak behind the scenes#parapines#Art by:#okkennymay#and#flipsidered#opps spent longer on that than I meant to#See you next time!#And trust me I have some fantastic content coming#*evil laughter*
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there's these purple flowers I pass when I go for my morning constitutional (checking my mail) and every single time I pass them I think "I should come back and take a picture of those once the sun is up!" and every time I go back out to get a picture of them I'm reminded why I haven't gotten a pic yet. They fucking close up once it starts getting hot and it's hot like 20 hours a day here. so have these pictures of some green bits and the impression of purple flowers instead
#idk what they are they just showed up a few weeks ago#the milkweed is coming in good tho we're getting a second wave of blooming from them and thats just pleasant#they are also purple and theres grasshoppers living in them that keep fucking jump scaring me when i go past.#oh and my wasp friend#the little pink one. has a brood now. Its behind my water heater and she gets fussy when i go past#I haven't been stung yet so i think she knows ill leave em alone#(dw about the water heater its been defunct for years the eggs will be fine)
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It's impossible to write a TOS x Any other Series crossover [for me] without having to think about whose lens it's going to primarily be from because the vibe of TOS is so distinct and I think quite different from all series that follow it. The way the characters speak and are presented is so theatrical and of course steeped in the past that I find myself considering if this is, say, Janeway meeting Kirk (through a VOY perspective) or if I should write Janeway as she would appear if she stepped through a portal and was in TOS' universe.
#finally watched enough TOS that I feel I can write some fics v_v#I hope this makes sense#it feels almost like you have to decide whether or not you're going to translate the characters#not remove them of anything (which 'no female captains' TOS would have done) - I'm talking more of a...vibe?#It feels like TOS has a very particular 'pattern of speech' so to speak that other series don't share#EX: 'And now they're making me tremble but I'm no longer afraid...I am no longer....afraid.'#This 'pattern of speech' is also why shows like S_NW who purport to take place prior to TOS and yet are so jaggedly marvel-ously (he's righ#behind me isn't he???) modern feel incongruent. As if they take place in another universe. <- Among the million other reasons#I read a post that was like 'TOS is about the 60's' and it's true - TOS is so The 60's and that doesn't mean one can't innovate and build o#it (obviously hence star trek) but if I'm going back to WRITE in the TOS-verse it feels like I need to get in that headspace a bit and#engage with it in some manner. It's also why spirk is so compelling to me AS a yearning relationship (other than my love of yearning)#a man loves a man on a starship and it's the far future and it's the 60's and they're aliens and they can't admit that love aloud#for one or many of those reasons#It's such a PARTICULAR and INTERESTING blend of the past and future#we've solved racism (in the 60's way a white man might conceptualize this) but women can't be captains#and among the millions of alien planets there is nothing more constant than a brave man loving a beautiful woman
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Writes a full blown essay about why Mary On A Cross is THE Sanlu song to me ever,
#Listen. I know the song is actually about weed. But that’s BESIDES the point#I can change the meaning. For MY ship ;)#Anyway there is actually a story behind this#I see reels on IG a LOT and I think one of the first times I saw an OP reel that took place during WCI#That song played. And I was like oh wait a second 👀#Now whenever I think about WCI I think about Mary On A Cross and then I think about Sanlu#THE LYRICS REALLY DO FIT THEM THO#’I had to let you go’ Sanji VS ‘I’ll never let you go’ Luffy#’If you choose to run away with me’ literally. Luffy. Trying to rescue Sanji from his fate and get him to run away from his family with him#’Your beauty never ever scared me’ AGAIN LUFFY ABOUT SANJI EVEN WITH HIS PAST AND HIS MODIFICATIONS#Also the whole thing about Mary on a cross. Makes me think of self sacrifice. Which is Sanji’s ENTIRE deal#Anyway this song sparks the Emotions in me.#It’s probably been way overused but not for me!!! IT IS THE SANLU SONG PERIODT#One Piece#Sanlu#Lusan#Shima speaks
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this is me ranting about season's of blossom/hamin's flower, so TW SUICIDE, but anyways i don't know what's worse:
->hamin sacrificing his freedom so that jaemin could live freely, yet that freedom making jaemin feel like he's suffocating years down the line
-> somang's speech on how it's because of everyone that hamin killed himself, yet how it's none of their faults, especially not hamin's own
-> them using the phrase "disappeared from this world" to describe his suicide, not outright saying he killed himself
-> the theme of radiance. hamin feeling like somang was the radiant one and he was drenched in darkness, thus trying to distance himself from her. yet somang describing the summer with hamin her most radiant time, only because of his presence in her life, because he shined the brightest to her
-> jaemin who loved the rain because good things always happen to him then just for hamin to kill himself on a day where it rained non-stop. hamin who hated the rain but learnt to love it compared to jaemin who loved it but now dislikes it
-> hamin's suicide indirectly preventing gaeul's and dongchae's attempts. somang being unknowingly destined to lose a loved one either way
-> jaemin's parents not knowing how to handle hamin's suicide, his mother depending on him to be happy and his father being distant and too lax on everything. driving him further into his own abyss. hamin having sacrificed his happiness and acting too grown up for his age to protect jaemin from their parents strictness. jaemin ending up doing the same for his mother, faking a smile and comforting her about the pain of hamin's suicide
-> hamin not having heard the latter part of jaemin telling seonhui that while he resents hamin a little, he still loves hamin most of all. hamin having died thinking jaemin hates him, somang's last words to him calling him a coward
-> jaemin being lowkey passively suicidal and even trying a form of self-harm to understand hamin and deal with the pain of losing hamin
-> the fact that we start hamin's story already knowing how it ends
#seasons of blossom#im thinking of seasons of blossom again and its fucking with me so hard#hamins flower was so perfectly well written that it always makes me cry#it's these thousands of things#the tragedy of it all and that you know what's gonna happen#we already know he'll kill himself but we can't stop ourselves from begging it to be different anyways#the fact that we get both somangs and hamins past and somangs and jaemins present#hamin haunts the narrative and i love that the story is not just about his pain but also about the pain of those he left behind#without making it seem like hamin wasn't hurting the most#god i love them so much#fuck#fun fact seasons of blossom's initials spell sob#WHICH IS WHAT IM DOING RIGHT NOW#HAMINNN😭#hamins flower#seasons of blossom hamin#tw sui implied#tw suicide#tw selfharm#tw selfharm mention#tw suicide mention
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I just shared the first bit of fiction that the main character from The Token Human appeared in with the $10+ patrons. Hard to believe that I wrote it eleven years ago! Of course I had no idea it would go anywhere, much less to a novel with a sequel in progress, and an endless series of short stories that shows no signs of stopping.
High five to my past self for scribbling down something worth playing with a bit more. And a bit more. And maybe some more...
#writer life#The Token Human#Robin Bennett#I chose the first name because I didn't know which gender I wanted to use at first#a couple story snippets in I decided 'eh why not just make her tall with a long braid like me -- that's easy to write.'#I've never intentionally made a self-insert character#on purpose#though I kiiiinda did on accident here#since it was just easier to use some of my own traits than to think up a proper new character from scratch#lol hey past self guess how that turned out#pretty well actually#oh also the last name came from two places at once: the Bennett twins from Steam Powered Giraffe and Shazzbaa Bennett the artist#both big influences at the time#a name choice I stand behind#now you know
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#kirby#daily kirby#my art#digital#hal laboratory#nintendo#I don't think I mentioned at the time because it was in the middle of kirb2k#but I had an appointment with a hematologist last week#they confirmed the culprit behind my chronic illness is definitely my mast cells#but I need to get a bone marrow biopsy next month to find out#if it's actually not-technically-autoimmune (mcas)#or if it's actually not-technically-cancer (mastocytosis)#which is actually good news cuz 1 someone finally confirmed my nearly 6 year old hypothesis instead of just agreeing (or disagreeing)#and 2 if it *is* mastocytosis they're gonna start medicating me A Lot more aggressively :)#which I need! I've been sick for right about 8 years now but it's gotten rapidly worse in the past 1-1.5 years#so clearly I'm badly under-medicated#(since I've been on all the same meds for 2 years except for my own emergency intervention.)#(I mean technically I've been chronically ill my whole life it just wasn't disabling until early 2016)#anyway I'm so tired I feel like a ragdoll half the time! sure hope I get adequate medication in a couple months!
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something something, visited by three spirits that push you to reinvent yourself
and meanwhile, the three mother-type figures in Adora's life were all key to her to figuring out what she really wanted and who she wanted to be but literally...
Light Hope "died" trying to right a wrong from the PAST
Queen Angella died trying to preserve Adora's PRESENT
and Shadow Weaver died to give Adora a chance at a FUTURE
#I could say this more intelligenty with time but this just occurred to me and I'm making it your problem#Shadow Weaver as the terrifying faceless cloaked figure#then her last words being 'this is only the beginning for you' as she bought them time (in the long and short term)#light hope essentially ending the world because of old programming from a long dead race of colonizers#then letting herself be destroyed over memories that should have been deleted bc she regretted what happened with mara#and the way the way the crystal castle gave you a tour of moments of your past like the first spirit#meanwhile angella was just trying to close the portal to save the present aka the life they had right now#but of course her staying behind completely altered the present for everyone especially glimmer#and meanwhile each of these losses served as key moments in Adora's journey (pos change arc if ur nasty)#and she emerged on the other side realizing it was not too late to change and make a new world#spop#shera#she ra#queen angella#light hope#shadow weaver#adora#a christmas carol#meta#do you see what I'm getting at?#this all started because I was picturing the three of them as ghosts at the end watching her Star wars style
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Narmada and her sister Sharika are the daughters of prominent Tamil feminist and human rights activist Rajini Thiranagama, who was murdered when they were children. Every time they speak of her I move away from grief that her life was so brutally cut short, to joy that she spent those years living a life more full of light and love than many can fit into a hundred. Nothing can compare to the legacy of being remembered this way by your children.
#i can't believe she was younger than me when she was killed#her daughters are several years older than me#it must be strange to live past the age your parent did#to realize the person in those wise and hallowed memories is now a peer and now much junior#i have so much awe and pride for the people who stood up to the blood drenched terrorism of the govt and of the militias that opposed them#i always wish i could ask them how they didn't drown the fear and despair#rajini knew they'd kill her and made her peace with it. even though she knew she'd be leaving her children behind#she and her husband seems to have been absolute relationship goals. an equal partnership?? in the 70s and 80s?? in this country??#talk about modelling self-worth for your daughters#parenting#wholesome#child rights#feminism#activism#advocacy#rajini thiranagama#sri lanka#mental health#tw death mention#mothers and daughters#knee of huss
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