#the pain is getting worse gradually but its alright

[purpleflameb0i]

Being on antidepressants (they can help with chronic pain apparently ??) and constantly heavily dissociated sometimes makes me remember that if I wasn’t dissociated or on meds, my pain would be a hell of a lot worse

Then I forget again

-Unknown

[cmncisspnandmore]

One Night Stand Part 7

Pairings: Simon "Ghost" Riley X Pregnant! Reader

Warnings: Medical drama, Fluff,

A/N: Hi loves, sorry for taking so long, i just moved into a new house and its been a lot. And honestly my mental health is trash. This part was also really hard to write for me because I had this happen to me. And i didnt realize how triggering it would be to write about it but the best way to get through the trauma is to write about it, right? maybe? no? well, anyways sorry if it sucks. i'll do better next time.

Word count: 1833...

New to the series? Catch up here: Part 6,

Your head pounded as you laid across the soft couch, each throb timed perfectly with the beating of your heart. There was no cuteness in pregnancy, not in your eyes at least. The glow that most women talked about was nothing more than a sheen of sweat that collected on your brow from your every move. There was a tiny human playing soccer with your organs, your ribcage the goal. They kicked wildly at the space below your ribs, the feeling enough to make you want to throw up. 

The past few days had been rough, you had a headache from hell and you just felt drained. Simon was concerned but you had chalked it up to the lingering cold you had going on. But now as you lay on the couch your stomach rolling with each passing moment you aren't so sure. Simon was on base today, having to complete some paperwork. He had woken you this morning, his lips peppering your face with soft kisses. 

He had tried to stay home but you had insisted he go, that you would be fine you would call if you needed him. Since he had left a few hours ago he had called you a few times, and you had reassured him each time that you were okay, you were just going to rest on the couch until he got home. You weren’t sure how long had passed since Simon had last called, but you had started to gradually feel worse. You push yourself up onto your elbows, and the world begins to spin around you. A wave of dizziness, crashing into you, as you blindly reach for your phone. 

You swallow trying to will yourself not to throw up. It takes you a few moments to find Simon's name in the phone, and putting it on speaker. It rings longer than normal but right before it goes to voicemail his panicked voice answers. “Hello? Y/n? What's wrong?”

“Simon… I… I don't feel good,” your voice shakes as you struggle to keep the phone in your hand. 

“Bloody hell, It’s alright Love, stay on the phone with me, i’m on my way,” there’s shuffling and the sound of boots hitting the floor in the background. “You’ll be okay, what's going on?”

“I have a headache… I'm nauseous, and I just don't feel good at all, I think something is really wrong,” you mumble, swaying slightly as you sit on the couch. 

“Okay, Love, do you have any swelling in your hands or feet?” The sound of Simon's truck revving filters through the phone. 

“Yeah a little,” You lean forward to the best of your ability and press on the top of your foot watching as your finger makes a light indent in the skin.

“Fuck..” Simon curses under his breath, “Love, go put your coat on, I’ll be there in a moment. Okay? We’re gonna go to the hospital.” 

“Simon?” you whisper, your voice shaking as you push yourself to stand, bracing yourself on the couch.

“Yeah love?”

“I’m scared…” you whisper, squeezing your eyes closed as tears threaten to spill down your cheeks. 

“I know, I'm pulling up now okay, I'm gonna hang up okay? I just parked the truck, I'm coming to get you.” Simon's voice cuts off as the line goes dead. You shuffle over to the coat rack and start to pull on your coat. Hot tears roll down your cheeks as you hold the coat closed around your stomach. A sharp pain under your ribs causing you to gasp, and brace your hands on the kitchen counter. 

The sound of heavy boots stops outside the door as Simon pushes into the apartment. He’s still wearing all his gear, his tight black t-shirt, his cargo pants and skull mask on. His brown eyes are full of concern as he walks towards you, his large hands resting on your hips. 

“C’mon Love lets get you checked out,” He whispers, pressing his lips to your forehead. Simon’s arms carefully pull you into him, resting your back against his chest as he guides you from the apartment and down to the car. Your mind feels cloudy and far away as Simon secures you into the truck. His hands brushing along your stomach as he fastens your seatbelt. You close your eyes focusing on the revving of the engine as Simon weaves the large black truck in and out of traffic. It was only moments later that it came to a screeching halt outside the A&E doors. He barely had the truck in park before he was jumping out and scooping you up in his arms. He cradles you against his chest as he bursts through the sliding glass doors.

“I need some help!” his voice is loud against your ear. The vibrations of it through his chest causing you to groan in pain. Each movement felt like it was sucking the soul out of you. Every breath hurt and you just wanted to sleep, but soon there were nurses and doctors swarming you. Each of them throws questions towards you, only to have Simon reply for you. 

“How far along is she?” a doctor asks as she shines a bright light in your eyes. 

“28 Weeks,” Simon's voice is laced with panic.

“Okay, let's get her up to Labor and Delivery people let's go! Someone call the NICU unit!” the on-call emergency room doctor calls out. It was like a swarm of bees, suddenly everyone was doing something. Someone was poking your arm with an IV while another was taking your blood pressure. You weren't sure whose hands belonged to who or what was going on. But after a few moments there was too much going on for your brain to process, and you passed out.

~~~~~

The beeping of the monitors was oddly familiar to you, like when you woke up after being caught in the stairwell after the apartment building you were living in caught fire. But this time there was an icy chill that ran down your spine when you heard it. The memories of what happened come flooding back.

Calling Simon, him rushing home, being rushed to A&E, the doctors concerned voice. The overwhelming sense of panic, and then nothing. You slowly pry our eyes open, fighting against the heaviness. The first thing you see is Simon's blonde hair, the wild strands sticking up at odd angles as it rests against the light blue hospital blanket. Your hand is trapped under his head. His cheek pressed firmly into the back of it. You wiggle your fingers slightly and he stirs. His head lifting, brown eyes blinking slowly as he came around. 

“Y/N?” He asks softly, his eyes meeting yours.

“Hi,” you croak softly, your throat dry and a little sore. 

“Oh god, baby, you scared me so much,” Simon whispers, his hands coming to cup your cheeks. He was still wearing his gear, minus his mask and vest, his black shirt slightly wrinkled. 

“I’m sorry,” you whisper, your right hand moving reflexively to rest on your stomach. You pause, eyes widening as the once firm bump is now squishy and numb. The world seems to stop spinning, time slowing. Your heart wants to stop beating in your chest but it won't listen. 

 “N-No.” Your voice cracks, eyes welling with tears and a look of confusion crosses Simon's face before he looks at your right hand. 

“Oh! No, love, shhh stop it’s okay. The baby is okay.” He rushes out, grabbing your left hand in his. His face is full of concern, his brow furrowed as he watches you slightly relax. After a moment you let out a shaky breath.

“What happened?” You whisper, looking up at him, his hand still clutched tightly around yours.

“You had PreEclampsia, but a severe case of it called HELLP syndrome. I’m not entirely sure what it means but they said the only way to save your life was to deliver the baby. So they performed an emergency C-Section and had to give you a blood transfusion. The baby is okay, they’re in the NICU. I haven't been able to see them yet, but a nurse came about an hour ago and said that they were fighting like crazy and we should be able to see them soon.” He explains, his brown eyes welling with tears. 

His voice is rough and strained, “I thought I was gonna lose you both.”

Hot tears well in your eyes as he admits his fear. A man as big and strong as Simon looked so small at that moment. He looked like a lost child who couldn't find home. The brave soldier who willingly ran into warzones and fought people with his bare hands had never looked so helpless. It was in this rare moment that you got to see the person behind the hardened soldier. The man who truly thought he was going to lose the person he cared about, and his child. Your heart ached for him, you wished you could take the worry and pain he had felt away but you couldn't. 

Fresh tears spilled down your cheeks, he must've been so scared, felt so hopeless. He was usually able to control some aspect of the situations he was in. He could fight his way out of the worst scenarios, he could plan an escape, and he was always prepared for things if they went south. But he wasn't able to fix you, he had been completely helpless as Doctors worked to save not only your life but that of his unborn child. 

“Oh baby, don't cry,” Simon's thumb strokes the skin under your cheek as he wipes away your tears. 

“I’m sorry I scared you,” you whisper, voice tight.

“It's not your fault, i’m just glad you're both okay.” He whispers, leaning forward and brushing his lips against your cheek.

“Tell me about the baby,” you blink away the rest of the tears, taking a steadying breath.

“It’s a girl, she weighs 1lb 2oz, and she's so small i don't even think she’d fill my entire palm. They aren't sure entirely what her future looks like, but the nurse that came in to check on you said she was a fighter, and she felt really good about her outcome.” He smiles, his brown eyes filled with pride as he talks about his daughter.

A daughter.

You had a daughter now.

The thought alone was crazy to you, you had been so sure the entire time it was a boy. You had a gut feeling but you were wrong, and you weren’t unhappy about it. You didn't care either way, the only thing you cared about was that they were okay.  That they would pull through everything and you would get to bring them home eventually. 

There's a soft knock on the door and a nurse with red hair pokes her head in. 

“Hi, do you two wanna go meet your daughter?”

Next Part: Part 8

Taglist: @coffeeandtealol, @natashamea18, @itsmytimetoodream @humanities-cutest @ajrfanz @jggykhug09090 @dedicateeverythingtomilkshake @ashreblogsnow

[miss-butcher09]

Simon 'Ghost' Riley

Warning: cursing, agnst, blood, trauma, torture, loss of child

Task Force 141 had a traitor among them. All the evidence pointed to Y/N , and now you were forced to endure the torment. To make matters worse, you were pregnant. Ghost sat behind the one-way mirror, observing the horrific scene unfold.

"I didn't take anything!" Y/N cried, tears streaming down their face. In response, they brutally kicked Y/N to the ground.

---

A year later, after they discovered she was no traitor, she was hanging on by a thread, cradling her baby, only for them to snuff out its life right before her eyes.

Ghost seethed with rage, his heart aching as he took in your frail and vulnerable form. He pounded his fists against the glass, frustration boiling over. The sight of his beloved being hurt was unbearable, igniting a fierce anger within him.

---

Following that year, she was moved to a hospital.

Ghost rushed to the hospital, anxiety gnawing at him. His heart raced as he neared your room, each step heavy with dread. Taking a moment to steady himself, he inhaled deeply before softly pushing the door open. There she was, sitting in her hospital bed, a blank expression on her face.

His heart throbbed painfully as he took in your fragile state. You seemed so shattered. He moved toward you gently, careful not to make any sudden moves that might frighten you.

"Hey there, darling..." he murmured softly, hoping to soothe your distress. You gradually lifted your gaze to meet his.

He carefully lowered himself next to you on the bed, his heart aching at the sight of your tear-streaked cheeks and battered body. With a tender touch, he reached out, intertwining his fingers with yours.

"How are you holding up?" he murmured gently, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear.

"My baby..."

The mention of your baby sent a sharp pang through his heart. He was all too aware of the tragedy that had unfolded; he had witnessed the horror firsthand. Anger surged within him, but he buried it deep for your sake.

"I understand... I truly do. I’m so sorry." He tenderly ran his fingers through your hair, a lump rising in his throat as he whispered,

"My baby..."

He drew you into his embrace, his arms surrounding you with a tender touch. His heart broke into pieces as he listened to your suffering cries for your child.

Ghost's body tensed the moment the men entered the room. His grip on you became a vice as he registered the expressions on their faces. The sight of them holding flowers only fueled his anger further. He drew you in closer, shielding you from their advance as they moved toward you.

"You need to get out. Right now," Ghost declared with a fierce intensity, his hold on you tightening even more. He understood their intentions were to make amends, but he was resolute—there was no way he would allow them to get near you after everything they had done.

His heart shattered further at the sound of your sobs. He lifted you onto his lap, allowing you to nestle your face against his chest. With a steely gaze, he directed his attention to the men, his eyes icy and brimming with barely hidden rage.

"Leave. I won’t repeat myself." The men nodded in unison, placing their flowers on the table before making their exit. Yet, Ghost's grip on you remained firm; he held you close, gently swaying you in a comforting rhythm, Concern etched on his face, he felt helpless, unsure of how to ease your pain.

"You’re safe now... I’ve got you... it’s alright..." he murmured softly, his hand gliding over your back in a soothing motion.

"They took my baby."

His gaze clouded with sorrow as those words slipped from your lips. He felt a deep ache in his heart while wrapping his arms around you, unable to fathom the depth of your grief. With tenderness, he pressed a kiss to your hair, pulling you in tighter.

"I understand... I truly do..." His voice was a soothing whisper, filled with compassion as he sought to ease your pain. "I’m so sorry... I can’t express how sorry I am."

"Tomorrow is the day of her funeral."

A wave of profound sorrow enveloped him at the mention of the funeral. The pain in your voice struck him deeply, making him ache for your heartache. He wished more than anything that you could be spared from such a devastating and harsh experience.

"Are you really sure you want to attend...?" he inquired softly, his hand continuing to caress your back with tenderness.

"It's just an empty casket."

His heart throbbed with grief once more. The mere idea of you enduring such hardship was unbearable for him. He longed to erase every ounce of your suffering; he couldn't stand to witness your pain.

"Oh, my dear..." He drew you in tighter, enveloping you in a warm, protective embrace. "We can stay here... you don’t have to face this alone..."

"But I need to go.."

He recognized the determination your heart to attend the funeral. Despite the unavoidable heartache it would bring, you felt the need to bid farewell one last time. With a tender motion, he drew you away from his embrace, searching your tear-streaked face for understanding.

"Alright... we’ll go. I’ll stand by you, I promise... okay, my love?" He cradled your face in his hands, his thumbs gently brushing away your tears. It pained him to see you in such distress. He longed to mend everything and ease your suffering, yet he understood the limits of his power. All he could offer was his unwavering presence, ready to support you through this dark time.

"I won’t abandon you... I swear, I’ll be right there with you every step of the way."

She nestled against him, seeking comfort. Just then, a nurse walked in, attempting to draw another blood sample, and her cries intensified. He instinctively enveloped her in his arms, shielding her from the situation. But the moment the nurse approached with the needle, her sobs grew louder. Ghost's protective instincts kicked in, and he tightened his grip around her, glaring at the nurse with fury.

"What on earth do you think you're doing?! Back off!" he yelled, his gaze fierce and filled with rage.

"I need it." The nurse claims, stopping in her tracks.

He shoots a fierce look at the nurse, his grip on you remaining unyielding.

"She's endured far too much today; she doesn't need any more invasive examinations!" He retorted, his tone resolute and commanding.

"Sir—." The nurse tries to speak up.

He interrupted her immediately, his voice sharp and firm.

"I don't care! Leave her alone, she needs rest and peace! Not more needles and tests!" He held you closer to him, shielding you from the nurse as best he could.

He keeps you nestled against him, his arms encircling you in a protective embrace. Tension lingers in his posture, his gaze flickering toward the door, wary of the nurse's return.

"Are you alright, my love? Did she cause you any pain?" he inquired softly, his fingers tenderly stroking your hair, while her hand rested on her belly.

A sharp ache pierced his heart as he caught sight of your hand resting on your stomach. The realization of your turmoil struck him deeply, and it pained him to witness you so shattered and distressed.

"Hey... hey, focus on me, darling..." He tenderly cradled your chin, lifting your face to meet his gaze. You looked up at him, your eyes reflecting the storm within.

He looked at you with such a softness in his eyes, his heart breaking for you. He gently brushed some hair away from your face, his touch so incredibly gentle and loving.

"I know this is hard.. believe me, I know.. but you can't keep torturing yourself like this, love.. you need to rest and take care of yourself.."

He could see you were exhausted, emotionally and physically. He wanted nothing more than to take away your pain and make everything better. He cupped your face in his hands, gently stroking your cheeks with his thumbs.

"Good.. you need to take it easy now, okay? No more stress, no more crying, just rest.. okay love?"

"Okay honey." she murmured and slowly lays down.

He smiled gently as you laid down, his heart melting at the nickname. He gently pulled the covers over you, tucking you in softly. As he watched you settle into the bed, he gently ran his fingers through your hair.

"That's my good girl.. try to get some rest now, okay? I'll be right here when you wake up.."

"Stay beside me?"

He smiled softly and nodded his head. He would be an idiot to say no to that. He gently moved to the other side of the bed and laid down next to you, his arms open and inviting.

"Of course.. I'm not going anywhere, love.. promise.."

she snuggled into him.

He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you against his chest. He held you close, feeling a sense of comfort as you snuggled into him. He gently placed a kiss on the top of your head, inhaling the sweet scent of your hair.

"Just rest now, sweetie.. I'm right here with you.."

she fell asleep quickly, feeling surrounding by his warmth and love.

He smiled softly as he felt your breathing even out as you fell asleep. He looked down at you, a deep feeling of protectiveness washing over him.

He gently tucked your head under his chin, his arms holding you close and tight.

"Sweet dreams, love.. I'm right here.."

---

Comment if you want a second part :)

I hope this is good. Have a great day/night, my little lovelies ♡

[steam-beasts]

Shedding

(This was from when Percy began shedding his chassis)

Percy’s driver and fireman scrambled through their bags and pockets for something. Anything. Any small little pill would do to ease the pain. As they searched, the cries of their engine echoed from outside. Percy was sobbing loudly and gasping for breath. This only made their searches for pills all the more frantic.

“For god’s sake! Where the hell are they?!” The fireman muttered angrily. If it wasn’t obvious, painkillers were what they were after. Their engine, Percy, had been shaking in excruciating pain for a week, and it was getting worse in every way imaginable. Just today, they got a call saying that Percy was just…screaming….screaming bloody murder. The guard on the phone described that it sounded as if their engine was getting murdered. They had to rush out of bed and skip their breakfasts to tend to him, because it sounded so bad. The whole infection had just been one big nightmare, in fact.

The driver gasped “I got them!” He cried, pulling out a tub of ibuprofen. Wasting no time, they rushed out to the sheds to where Percy remained parked. They both nearly stopped when the lingering copper scent filled the air. It had been there since the pain began the week before.

His poor face was scrunched up in agony, what remained of his teeth clenched and his eyes were firmly shut. Small, shallow gasps escaped the saddle-tank’s mouth through his teeth as he struggled to form words. Quickly, his driver climbed on to his buffers, wincing at every whimper Percy let out.

“Dri….Driiii…” Percy tried to speak, but even moving his mouth and talking was painful. Everything hurt. Especially his chassis. His driver shushed him gently, petting his cheek “Percy…Percy, it’s ok. It’s ok…I know it hurts but I need you to open your mouth for me..” he said in a gentle voice. Percy cracked open an eye, a tear leaking out “Mm…mo…mouth?” He managed to whimper out. The driver nodded “Yes, mouth. Can you do that?”

Hesitantly, the tank engine slowly opened his mouth to reveal the slightly grotesque sight; Nearly all his teeth were gone, his inflamed gums stained heavily with dark red blood and vomit, together making a scent that would make you believe that something died in there. His tongue….god…his tongue seemed to have grown? The driver didn’t know why, but it looked longer and pointier, twitching and salivating. Fumbling with the tub, the driver popped open the lid and poured every single pill in there. Immediately, Percy swallowed it up and quickly shut his mouth, panting heavily.

His driver stepped down and took a step back before the fireman spoke “Alright, ol’ boy. Those pills will take a moment to work, but you’ll feel better for a bit” he said. Percy still shook with pain, but managed to muster a small smile “Th…Thank…” he whispered, already feeling some relief. His crew smiled back and both decided to stay nearby, just in case.

But the relief didn’t stay for long.

Suddenly, Percy groaned as his body made strange metallic groans and creaks. Alerted by this, his crew kept watch. The groaning of metal and creaking got gradually louder, until Percy looked at his crew with terrified eyes.

His last words sent shivers down their spines;

“Driver…Fireman…my chassis doesn’t feel right..” The words had barely left Percy’s mouth when a loud, shuddering crack echoed through the shed. The driver and fireman exchanged alarmed glances, their breaths quickening. Percy’s entire frame seemed to tremble, his siderods, as if being pulled apart by some unseen force, bent and snapped off. Pieces of his chassis began to rip and fall off, blood pooling the ground. A wail of pain left Percy’s lips as his frame suddenly arched and bent, almost cartoonishly.

His wheels cracked and slid off his axles without problem, making him vomit. Tears rolled down his eyes as he just continued to vomit while his body lurched forward and without warning, a grey, grotesque looking appendage clawed its way out of his chassis, covered in blood and other bodily fluids.

The driver and fireman just stood, frozen in horror as the grotesque appendages emerged, writhing and clawing at the ground. Percy’s sobs turned into guttural, inhuman sounds, his eyes wide with a mixture of pain and terror. The appendages, slick with blood and other fluids, continued to grow out a bit, with patches of what seemed like wet fur.

Focusing more on his front appendages, they appeared to be arms with hand-like paws on the end that had green claws. By that point, Percy unconsciously put them to use, clawing deeper gashes in his undercarriage, ripping off more until more grey flesh was seen, pulsating and making quick breathing motions, going in and out. It only dealt him greater pain.

His hind legs writhed and twitched violently, also tipped with green claws, his legs kicked the air and scratched at the dirt below, making claw marks in the ground. Percy’s incoherent sounds had devolved into feral, pained growls as an extra appendage grew out. It was long, slick with blood and also patched with fur; a tail.

Finally, one last snap filled the air and Percy let out a nearly monsterous roar of agony, crawling out of his dismantled chassis with weak limbs. The crew didn’t do anything but watch, they were grossed out, petrified, and felt like vomiting themselves from how gory the scene was. Seriously, it looked like something out of The Thing.

Percy shuddered and gasped for breath, his frame rising up and down with each heaving breath, each breath aslo accompanied by a creaking noise.

His legs and arms were sprawled out, twitching and gently clawing at the dirt, his tail also twitching. Percy’s face was locked in a thousand yard stare, his amber eyes bloodshot and wide open. His mouth dripped with blood and vomit, covering his chin and buffers. After a few minutes of silence, the crew hesitantly made their way towards him.

“P….Percy?”

Percy’s eyes slowly turned to the two men. He stared at them intensely, with an almost predator gleam. His nose twitched, and his mouth parted, a soft growl coming out. His arms and legs shifted as he slowly tried to stand. His arms and legs wobbled, but he managed to fully stand up, looming over them with his new size and stature.

The driver and fireman exchanged another fearful glance. Percy, now a grotesque hybrid of engine and beast, was standing on his new limbs, towering over them with an intimidating presence. His body, still covered in patches of fur and slick with blood, glistened from the light. His claws scraped the ground as his eyes locked on to them.

“Percy…”

A hungry smile spread across his face, his eyes wide with excitement as his tail began wagging.

Percy has found his first meal.

[hokkersujinn]

Author's notes; I'm a whore for Natsume and biting in general. First work btw:3!

Contains: Maybe ooc Natsume(?) Biting, Marking, Hickeys.. Gn reader, Y'all do it in your bedroom, kinda suggestive, Idk how to write properly!!

You can hear both of your breathing echoing in your bedroom. How many minutes have passed ever since you last felt comfortable in your current position right now? Natsume came over to hang out with you since he got the day off, And suddenly you were now on his lap facing him dealing with him.

"Natsume, can you stop for a moment?" You called out to the boy whose mouth was latched on your neck, It seems like it wasn't really effective because he just ignored you. Attempting to make him stop, you tried to push his head away with your hand but this only seemed to make it worse; he grabbed your hands and just held them in place while he continues to kiss your neck.

You didn't really mind him doing this but you still had a life, you need to start getting work done before it gets late. However Natsume didn't want you to.

"When will you be done? I still have work to do- Ah-!" You got caught off my him suddenly biting the side of your neck. He wasn't being rough with his bites but it still hurt. "Oh, Kitten, You'll have plenty of time tomorrow. An idol rarely gets his day off you know~ Let me relish this moment for as long as I want." You feel your face getting warm from embarrassment and shame. There's no way you just made such a noise.

Natsume let go of your hands and wrapped his arms around your waist and continued to bite and kiss your neck. You feel your face getting flushed and you just wanna run away and hide, you're not used to this after all. You put your hands on his shoulder and gripped it. "..hmm? you want more?" He teases you, ignoring the fact you were 100% uncomfortable with this situation but it's not like you're trying to get off him.

He gives you a soft kiss and continues to bite your neck, until he came up with a new idea.

"Hey is it okay if I... did this?" He pulled the side of your shirt, revealing more of your shoulder indicating he wants to bite that part. Before you could even say no, your head just nodded at him. "Tell me if its painful." He started with soft kisses that gradually resulted with him grazing his teeth on your skin, and suddenly he just started sucking on your skin. You shivered at the contact. You can't even find the words to tell him that it's painful, but the sensation of his mouth on your neck feels good to you.

You wrap your arms around his head while he continues to mark your neck with a hickey. His hand eventually letting go of your waist and inching their way onto your hips and your thighs. "So soft..," He murmurs between breaths. You on the other hand, you're squirming around against him since this feeling is new to you.

"Natsume..!" He snapped out of it when he heard your voice. "Are you alright? Did I go too far?" He asks with concern in his voice. He removes his hands from your thighs and cups your face. You couldn't take it anymore, you were overstimulated from the contact. Natsume being handsome doesn't help too. "I'm fine, Its just that- I couldn't take it anymore." He understood and waited for you to get off his lap, but you stayed.

He apologizes for his behavior and admires the marks he gave you. The hickey was red and it was pretty. He pressed his fingers on the hickey. You wince in pain a bit. "That's such a pretty color, don't you think so kitten?"

"We should do this more often.."

[mistboundmoon]

Mosaic (Akumabug)

Adrien glanced around his room, now illuminated by telltale blue embers of time, and felt every nerve in his body light in alarm as Bunnyx's exhausted form stumbled through the portal that had blazed into existence. He rushed to her side as she collapsed on the floor, shuddering coughs tearing through her throat.

"Bunnyx? Are you alright?" He asked in a rush as he helped her up. "D-doesn't matter," she choked. "Something terrible has happened, and you're our only shot at fixing it." Leaning on Adrien, she raised a trembling hand to the air, faint sparks dancing along her fingers. A second portal flashed before them, and Adrien exchanged a worried glance with Plagg before calling on his transformation and helping Bunnyx through. The interior of the Burrow was as harrowing as it always was, but for an entirely different reason than normal- the infinite number of rippling windows into time that usually greeted travelers, bekoning them with whispered could-have-been's and might-be's were absent, leaving the endless white abyss to expand into oblivion. With no sense of space within this void of time, Adrien searched for something to focus on to keep his head from spinning. Bunnyx was in rough shape, even worse than he'd initially realized. Her usually sharp gaze was clouded with pain and fear, and her rabbit ears were pinned back, occasionally flicking nervously. She seemed to be steading herself, prepairing for something, but each breath seemed to bring her some amount of distress. There was something else about her too, something he couldn't quite place, something wrong about her that his eyes refused to focus on, but for the life of him he couldn't figure out what. A million questions raced through his mind, fighting to be asked, but he settled on the simplest he could manage. "What happened, Alix?"

It could have been a second before she responded, or a minute. In this fathomless space, it felt like an eternity.

"...Have you ever wondered what would happen if you were akumatized?"

"I try not to think about thing's that won't happen."

A dry laugh echoed through the Burrow. "Good one, but its less that it won't happen and more that you can't allow it to. If a miraculous wielder as powerful as you were akumatized, it would be catastrophic. Worse than Monarch winning."

"What are you getting at? I've never been akumatized."

Bunnyx shook her head, "In your timeline, maybe, and only because we worked to undo and retroactively prevent it from ever happening."

Adrien felt his blood run cold. Undo it? Had he been akumatized before? Had he, in some far off, erased timeline, been corrupted? Bunnyx flickered like a match going out and relighting, and she fell into another coughing fit. "W-what are you saying? Did.... Did I do this to you?" Adrien finally managed.

"N-no." Bunnyx rasped. "Destruction was a gradual fade into nothingness. Now I feel like my cells are burning... Like I said, if someone as powerful as you were akumatized, it would be devestating. World ending. But you're still here..."

His heart stopped. Any distress he had felt at the idea of losing himself was gone in an instant, replaced by dawning horror of what Bunnyx was implying.

"That's impossible-" he whispered. "That could never..."

Adrien looked up, searching pained eyes. Bunnyx looked so fragile, a far cry from the strong, sassy hero he had always seen her as. The stalwart protector of ages, reduced to a shivering hare... and there, imperceptible but for the stillness of their shared stress, it was. The wrongness he hadn't been able to discern. Shimmering lines were drifting from Bunnyx's suit, the nearly invisible hexagonal mesh weave of her transformation was sloughing off her body. It was subtle, but the glimmer was unmistakable now that he had seen it- the very threads of her existence were being pulled from her being. The faint hexagons drifted mere centimeters from her surface before splitting, becoming undone. Subtle shapes curling in on themselves and twisting in on each other, endlessly. It hurt to watch, a physically excruciating thing to behold happen to a person, watching as the very fibers of their life were mutated beyond recognition. There was a word for this, for what was happening to Alix Kubdel.

She was fractalling.

Becoming mosaic.

A sputtering portal burned into existence beside them, and Bunnyx stumbled away from Adrien, barely standing, but still defiant. "Every other future has already been obliterated, or worse. This is the only timeline yours will ever lead to, if we don't fix it. I know its a lot to ask, but you're the only one that can do this... Get in, destroy the akuma, and get out. We should know enough by then to prevent this possibility from ever being realized."

Fear coiled through Adrien's veins, turning his body sluggish and unresponsive, but he forced himself to take a shuddering breath and step froward, towards the portal. Towards the unknown end of realities that existed on the other side. He could do this, he had to do this.

Behind him, he heard Bunnyx's strength give out as she collapsed to the ground, but he couldn't bring himself to look away from the task ahead of him. If he faltered for even a second, he wasn't sure he'd be able to bring himself to face it again. Every cell in his body urged him forward, to do the one thing he would always do, and every cell in his body screamed for him to run away, away, away from this impossible future.

Bunnyx's broken voice drifted through the void around him as stepped through the portal and into this finale that must be undone.

"Do what you do best, Chat Noir."

"Save Ladybug."

@isabugs and i have been rotating this idea like two feral cavedwellers rotating a cartoon slab of meat on a spit. and like those two feral cavedwellers, we have been cooking. here are some drabbles :)

[xxsycamore]

𝐒𝐮𝐧𝐤𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐍𝐮𝐧𝐮𝐜𝐡𝐞

↬☀️ Napoleon notices your sun-burnt face and he's not happy about the fact that you've yet again failed to take care of yourself...

Napoleon Bonaparte x f!Reader • rating: G • tags: Fluff; Banter; Silliness; Sunburns • wordcount: 756 • masterlist

a/n: It's me. I'm the sunkissed Nunuche in question. While bearing the consequences of my nunucheness I'm staying inside and writing this as a memory of the short holiday I'm on... Looks like Napo is the balm for all my pains, sunburns included lol

"I might be falling asleep on the beach but at least I'm doing it under the shade. Unlike a certain Nunuche."

Your facial muscles twist in a grimace, and even that hurts. That's the last thing you want to hear from the man who would've found himself in the same situation as you - if not in a worse one! - have you not chosen to wake him up as soon as the sun changed its position and gradually crawled across his bared chest. Like the reverse Sleeping Beauty he is, Napoleon is used to capturing your lips in a kiss in order to leave the depths of slumber, and afternoon naps are included in his repertoire as well, as of recently. Spoiling him like that is a no-no, you discovered as soon as he took hold of the hand shaking him awake and pushed himself off the beach chair to find your mouth and claim it. In public. Luckily, you managed to escape in the nick of time. Still! He's just as deserving of being scolded for his actions as you are!

"You're very distracted. Did you not put on sunscreen on your face at all?"

"I did!"

"After you went for a swim?"

"...No."

Napoleon lets out a disappointed sigh, not missing a beat as he finishes dismantling the umbrella while making a gesture for you to take off the beach bag that you've just put over your shoulder. You want to murmur something about him showing off with the number of things he is already carrying, but you realize quickly that he must be worried about the state of your reddened shoulders too. Whoops, another missed spot. As usual, he's not vocal about the little things he does in your favor, while choosing to be vocal with his teasings instead.

As your mind trails off about the kiss that never happened, you find another reason to furrow your brows in a frown. The ever-so-perceptive Napoleon notices the sourness painted across your heated face and leans in closer as you two walk down the beach alley.

"Are you alright, Nunuche? Does it hurt that badly?"

"Uh-huh...I must've gotten another sunburn...here."

Napoleon halts his step to examine the area you've put your palm on, but as you remove it for his eyes, he doesn't see any signs of damage done by the mischievous sun of mid-July. As if hit by a sudden realization as to where exactly you were pointing towards, he tips his chin up, returning his gaze on yours.

"Your heart?"

"Yes. It hurts because... you can always get your wake-up kiss when we get behind closed doors but... I won't get my smooch shower...! Because my cheeks are sunburnt!"

Trying to put so much intuition while keeping your voice down is a challenge, and even more so without emphasizing it with a matching facial expression. But you don't want to sound too serious, otherwise he'd just-

"Pfft. Bahahahaha!"

A person or two look your way, no more. It's more than enough. It's plenty. Your face can't possibly get more heated than that, no matter the embarrassment-powered enhancement. You look again at Napoleon, putting on your best mean glare - you didn't want to sound too serious, but now that he laughed at you, you're incited to stand your ground. To your surprise, he's the one looking offended now.

"First you're not giving me my wake-up kiss, now you've deprived me of the pleasure of kissing your face as a whole."

HUH!

"H-How did you turn things around like that?! That's-"

"You're not taking care of my Nunuche and now I can't give her love properly. I'm looking forward to how you're going to make up for this damage."

Not taking care of his Nunuche... he can't get more absurd than that. All thoughts of tending to yourself once you're home crumble because even now you can see through his words - you've learned how to - and the image of his feather-light touch putting lotion on the sensitive skin appears so very clearly in your mind. Taking a cold shower with him even, if he feels the need to. You know how thoughtful he could get.

"I miss those kisses a whole lot already, so I'll make sure to take proper care of your Nunuche, Napoleon!"

"You miss the kisses? Strange... Are you sure? You've gotten plenty of kisses already, by the looks of it. You're thoroughly sunkissed."

"NAPOLEON! ...Hey, don't speed up your step like that! Wait for me!"

Taglist: @arsnovacadenza @ale-teodora @kimi00twin @otomelady @privilegedpancake @g-kleran    @pumpumnnnp @thesirenwashere @ravenarld @kimmy-banana @devonares @galaxyprison @sadshaxk @starshards26 @thewitchofbooks @acethephoenix256 @ikevamp-shrine-2 @nad-zeta @crystal13unny @keen19thcenturygoatsstudent @lordsister @ikemen-banshou   @themysticalbeing @canaria-blackwell @otome-scribbles @rhodolitesrose @coornn @kpop-and-otome @queen-dahlia @kisara-16 @chaosangel767 @ikemenlibrary @queengiuliettafirstlady @aurora-morning @aquagirl1978 ​ @ikemenlover24 @violettduchess @mcofthemansion @joy-the-reader @katriniac @ikemen-writer @tele86 @lovely-bubb1es @aria-chikage @babyblue0t7 @rhodoliteschaos @my-day6 Let me know if you want to be tagged/untagged!

[kingsdespair-if]

Okay first I have to say the writing and characters are well written so far and I'm looking forward seeing the other RO's and I love the small details when we are a different species and if it's alright I'd like to ask three questions:

1.Will we be able to show off our skills to the RO's like when random beast attacks the Mc shows of their combat skills or showing off their healing abilities to them?

2.In mc's world how are the other races living? I read that the other races tend to avoid humans so I was wondering if they their own kingdoms?

3.Does mc have a secret power we don't know off?🤔

Also this one is an ask:How would the RO's react to mc healing up their injuries and mc accidentally stings the RO's injury so they place a kiss on the back "Sorry does it still hurt?" They ask gently.

(ALSO THANK YOU FOR ANSWERING THIS AND I'M SO SORRY FOR THIS LONG ASK YOU DON HAVE TO ANSWER THEM ALL!!!(⁠-̩̩̩⁠-̩̩̩⁠-̩̩̩⁠-̩̩̩⁠-̩̩̩⁠_⁠_⁠_⁠-̩̩̩⁠-̩̩̩⁠-̩̩̩⁠-̩̩̩⁠-̩̩̩⁠)ﾉ⁠♡)

Hello, dear.

Thank you so much. 💜

Let's see...

1 - Yes, I will simply say yes for now without providing any further explanation and then depart. 👀

2 - Yes, every race has its own realm. Some get along well enough, but others hate each other. The only common ground for every race is the avoidance of humans whenever possible. When inside the game, you can click on the sidebar and find an option called "Realms and Races" for a more detailed explanation of each race and realm. I have even provided the realm names and a few facts about them. 3 - MC does not have a secret power per se, but they do have something unique that you guys have yet to discover. It's quite important and is also the reason why MC will be contacted by Egon for a specific quest.

Now, for the last question, here we go:

You feel your magic flowing like a river through your fingers, taking on a beautiful cyan color as it enters the skin of the person in front of you.

Taking an arrow is painful, but removing it is even more so.

However, you were able to do it with minimal pain.

The healing magic surrounds the injury like a cyan mist, gradually closing the wound.

Your patient has been quiet throughout the process, leading you to believe that it probably didn't hurt as much. With the first step of the healing process complete, you halt the flow of magic and gently touch the wound with your fingers to inspect it.

Hey! Ouch…" you hear a small whimper of pain. You smile gently and place a soft kiss on the wound.

"I'm sorry. Does it still hurt?" you ask, prepared to continue using your healing magic.

~

Amisha grinds her teeth but still manages to give you a charming and flirty smile. "I'm not sure… Perhaps. I think I need more kisses to make up for the pain you caused me," she playfully winks at you.

~

Veleena closes her eyes and lets out a heavy sigh. "I've had worse, but it still hurts. I didn't mean to whimper. I'm sorry. You're doing great, thank you," she lightly touches the spot where you kissed her, a slight smile appearing on her lips.

~

Khalid pretends he didn't even flinch, but you notice his eyes fixating on the spot where you kissed him. "No, you're doing a sufficient job. You can almost compare to Xa'aron's healers…" he trails off briefly before whispering, "Thank you…"

~

Veldon smiles warmly at you, a mischievous sparkle in his eyes. "Yes, I'm feeling a lot of pain, doc. Here, maybe you could kiss it better?" he playfully pouts and points to his lips, while you roll your eyes in response. Once again.

~

Kaellë inspects the wound, which is now closed. Her gentle smile and warm gaze meet yours. "It did sting a little, but I'm fine, thanks to you. You're an amazing healer. Perhaps we could share knowledge?" She asks, a faint pink blush coloring her cheeks.

~

Mauthak growls softly, but remains close to you. You notice him shifting slightly, seeking the sensation of your lips against his skin. "Yes, but I can handle it. Do I need to apply some mud, or is it completely healed now?", he asks in a serious tone.

~

Secret takes your hand and kisses your palm. "I'm perfectly fine; it was just a scratch. Thank you," they gently raise your hand to their mouth and lick away the remnants of their dry blood, as if it were a normal gesture. Lovely weirdo this one.

[ahsterism]

@marymycete asked: ❛ promise me you’ll still be here when i wake up. ❜ / ethan :) // an assortment of dialogue prompts

HE HASN'T SLEPT THROUGH a full night since escaping the mutamycete— or, rather, Rose pulling him from its tethers in another reconstruction of his body. He looks mostly human ( aside from the too pale skin... the whites that occasionally cloud his eyes ), feels... well, he didn't feel it before, when he didn't know and stayed able to live as normal. Ethan has long since lost the ability to ignore the mold's signs. The body may be new, but it remembers all the same ( he can tell from the irritated tingling that tends to pass through his hands, the hollow, yet achingly tight pain in his empty chest ). The memories are worse... enough time has passed for reality to start sinking in. Yet, no matter how many times he greets Rose in the morning, or talks to her at dinner, or holds her in his arms... he sees her die every single night.

Ethan's habit of shaking awake in the middle of the night gradually turned into visits to Rose's room— multiple times now, he's stood next to her bed, assuring himself of her safety yet struggling to breathe. He was bound to find her in the midst of her nightmares eventually. He woke and reassured her as fast as he could, of course, and though it breaks his heart to see Rose's pain ( which she insists on leaning into denial of, Ethan supposes he should have expected that, leaving her with Chris ) there's a... bittersweet feeling, too. All he ever wanted was the chance to protect her, the pain of knowing he couldn't was unbearable, and he'll endure every sleepless night to know he could now.

"Of course," Ethan nods, reaching out to tuck a strand of loose blonde hair behind her ear. They've... calmed down, by now ( both of them, really ), and he can sense Rose's exhaustion. "I'll stay right here til you do, alright? I promise. You just try and get some sleep."

[staticthief]

I Went to Get an Eye Exam

by Krennthief

The optometrist’s voice was strangely harsh in this neutral, inoffensive exam room. An ancient CRT monitor hummed as I nervously gazed down a blurry road that led to a blurry old house, intermittently and briefly popping into focus with a click only to ease back into a colorful fuzz. My head was killing me.

“Just focus on the house, Laurel,” the doctor said, his tone betraying the irritation he had been attempting to mask behind a formerly friendly demeanor.

I felt my struggling eyes buzz against the entire hour of sleep I’d managed to get that week due to an awful headache I’d been unable to get rid of with the usual over-the-counter painkillers. Suffering, desperate for a solution, I called my mom for advice.

“Have you gotten your eyes checked lately, bub?” her helpful, muffled voice chimed over the phone. “Last time I was getting intense migraines like that it was time to get my eyes checked, and they said my prescription improved! Got my new glasses and no more migraines for this lady!”

Figuring her idea made sense, I drove my throbbing cranium to the closest eye doctor I could find, praying my insurance would cover at least something. So there I was.

“I can’t get a good image if you aren’t focusing on the house, okay?” said the doctor.

“Got it.”

After a few more clicks and varying clarity of that giant house inexplicably built in the dead-center of that long stretch of dusty road, the image began to burn itself into my mind, even in its absence as I closed my eyes.

A moody, gray expanse of sky looming overhead. A seemingly endless ocean of yellowing green pastures surrounding a beaten dirt road. The huge, country-style house, its aging whitewash peeling off the exterior’s wide wooden panels. A large, oaken door in the middle with gaping, dark windows hanging on either side. The peak of a gray-shingled roof pointing beyond the house’s zenith. A single, circular window for the second floor with the soft amber glow of a light within. Something’s up there.

I opened my eyes once more to look at the image. It was clear again, but I could have sworn that the second floor window had been lit only a moment ago. Maybe I had imagined it.

I blinked again and heard another click. The burned-in image returned, and like I had thought before, the light upstairs was on.

As soon as it hit me that this was strange, the hum of the room gradually evolved into a sharp ringing in my left ear and my headache returned in full force. Not even the clinical busy-work of the eye exam could distract me from this pain anymore. I let out a moan and rubbed my fingers against my temples.

“That bad, huh?” the doctor tisked. “Alright bud, you’re done with this one. Let’s move on.”

The remainder of the visit was just as miserable. The migraine rocked my head in waves that seemed to only increase in intensity as the optometrist tried as hard as he could to maintain his patience with my constant groaning.

Sighing, the doctor said, “So your vision is worse than last time. Like you told me earlier, a massive change in prescription is probably why you’re getting these crazy headaches.”

Bad news. I knew she didn’t mean to raise my hopes only for them to be dashed, but I was somewhat annoyed at my mom. I was probably just jealous of her good eyes. I shouldn’t hold that against her.

“Your insurance covers 40% of a pair of new eyeglasses, and 50% of a set of contacts,” he said. “I recommend you get some disposable contacts from us today while you wait for your glasses, too. That’ll probably help the headaches in the meantime.”

His mouth grinned, but his eyes did not. Did I ruin his day or something?

I shelled out the remainder of the bill after picking some frames out and getting one box of contacts for each eye and popped them in, years of contact-use leaving me unfazed by the action. Instant relief.

Later that day, I was so happy that I cheered out loud alone in my kitchen after not feeling an ounce of pain for several hours. Cautiously, I took my contacts out to go to bed, feeling no inkling of pain hinting at the corners of my brain like I had every night before. It was so worth it to use that sick leave.

Lights out. I lay in bed and closed my eyes. Again, the farmhouse in the pasture haunted my retinas. Peculiarly, the image had changed since the exam.

The light is on upstairs. The door is ajar. Was the door always ajar?

Troubled, I tossed and turned, refusing to open my eyes for any reason, clinging onto the fragile exhaustion that I had hoped would lead to the sleep I had been seeking all week.

The light goes out. The door creaks open. A figure walks toward me along the road, its wrong shape lumbering toward me. I hear a click and its face becomes clear to me—pallid, sickly lips stretching, ripping into a too-wide grin, piercing, bloodshot black eyes below a mop of greasy yellow hair staring deep into my soul. Its body is covered in faded blue coveralls (or is it skin??) lumpy and misshapen. Something is wrong.

I screamed and woke up, heart pounding in my chest. Something was in here with me. I turned the light on, but my darkened room was only a blur of colors to my poor vision.

A click. I stare in horror at the only thing in the room I can see without my contacts. I shouldn’t be able to see it, but there it is amid the murky blur of my room.

Paralyzed, I watch as it grins and stalks toward me. My headache returns and I black out.

[phantomwarrior12]

Reveal

She wasn’t there.

The Vanguard needed her, she was only gone a few days.

In that time, Acrius was deployed to the Leviathan for a standard sweep. To clear more Nightmares, he should have been fine.

Saladin tells her there was an ambush. Acrius protected the rest of his unit, bought them time to get clear and call for reinforcements. They made it to him just in time but–

That’s all she heard before she bolted to the med bay.

Where is he?

She moves through the space rapidly, scanning medical berths until she finds him in the farthest corner. He’s hooked up to a number of machines, his form bandaged in several places. Beside him, his mask lies on the stand; broken, a breathing mask in its place.

Acrius–

She reaches out, trembling fingers pressing against bruised skin. When he doesn’t respond, her chest clenches, anxiety welling to the surface as her hand fits into his.

Wake up. Please–

“Ah, Guardian.” The medic greets, finally approaching her and drawing her gaze from her husband.

She takes a step toward him, nodding to Acrius pointedly. How is he?

“He’ll be alright.” The medic begins, pulling up his file on his med pad, “Severe burns, broken ribs and a dislocated knee. Given time, he’ll make a full recovery.”

“Will he wake soon?” She manages, squeezing Acrius’s hand.

“Undoubtedly. You’re welcome to stay, talking to him might bring him around faster.”

She nods slowly, “Thank you.”

The medic nods and departs, leaving the Young Wolf alone with Acrius.

The Young Wolf hoists herself up onto the berth beside him, lifting his hand carefully before letting it rest in her lap. Her fingers trace along the pads of his, desperate to see anything in his features as he lay there.

He looks pained as is. Not at peace, but struggling, fighting as he so often does.

“Wake up, Acrius,” she pleads softly, barely able to find her voice.

She isn’t sure how long she stays there, clutching his hand tightly, but at some point - some point, she finally notices his jaw.

The story Caiatl had told her, about Acrius’s past. About his injury - it doesn’t look as horrendous as she described. Perhaps time had lessened its severity but the Young Wolf has seen much worse. It doesn’t faze her.

She smiles slightly, leaning forward to press a kiss against his jaw as she squeezes his hand.

You’ve hidden so long, haven’t you?

Her smile falters as she takes in the rest of his features, the pain still lingering in the scrunch of his eyes, the wheeze with every breath, the labored rise and fall of his chest.

She can ease his pain, can’t she? Her Light can–

She sets her jaw. A Warlock might be able to. A healing rift, perhaps but Hunters? Can her healing grenades soothe some of his discomfort?

The Young Wolf looks over her shoulder - the medic is occupied with another patient across the room. She has to try. She can’t stomach seeing him suffer.

Her eyes close as she draws upon her Light, manifesting a healing ‘nade in her palm. She looks toward the medic once more, ensuring he hasn’t noticed anything before she turns back to Acrius.

This will help. It has to.

She carefully presses the Light against his chest, soft waves washing over his form and she watches his features ease a fraction, gradually softening to something resembling relaxation. His breathing evened out, less a strained inhale and exhale and more sound.

It did work.

“Guardian,” Saladin’s sharp voice captures her attention and her eyes snap toward the source. The Light in her hand dissipates quickly as the Iron Lord steps up to her. “You know that isn’t permitted.” His voice is soft yet stern.

“It helped,” she returns quietly, gripping Acrius’s hand a bit tighter.

“Hardly. You can’t have known that would work, let alone if his body would tolerate it.” Saladin tilts his head, standing beside the medical berth, “The Light is not meant to heal the Lightless, Guardian. It’s dangerous for him to be subjected to it.”

Her head lowers, her eyes flitting to Acrius as she lifts his hand, resting her cheek against it. “He’s–”

“Healing on his own,” Saladin lays a hand on her shoulder, “Have patience. He’ll awaken soon.”

Her jaw flexes but she nods regardless.

The Iron Lord withdraws and reaches for something, his Ghost transmatting Acrius’s knife into his hands. “He was awake for a brief amount of time when they brought him in. Asked me to give you this when you arrived.”

She stares at the weapon for a long moment, “Did he…say why?”

“No, I’m afraid not.” He sets it on the stand beside Acrius’s mask. “But I’m sure he’ll tell you himself when he awakens. But for now,” he lays a hand on her forearm, “No more Light, understood?”

She nods again, shifting her focus back to Acrius.

“Have heart, Young Wolf. He's nothing if not resilient." He touches her shoulder gently before leaving her alone.

The Guardian repositions, laying down on the berth before she lays her head on his shoulder. His hand twitches against her thigh and she manages a smile.

"I'm right here," she whispers, squeezing his hand, "Always.".

—----------------

There's a steady weight on his shoulder.

Acrius’s features contort, willing himself into a state of awareness before the pain strikes him and he grimaces.

Then, a warm body. Something holding his hand and he doesn't need to open his eyes to know who it is.

He curls his hand tighter around his wife's, tucking her closer against his side as his head lulls toward her.

She groans softly before her form goes rigid and now he knows she's awake. Her hand is tugged free and suddenly she's leaning on his chest, anxiously touching his face.

He huffs out a pained noise as he removes the breathing mask. He's quick to try and guide her off his chest and she nearly falls off the berth trying to accommodate him.

"Settle, Little One." Acrius rumbles, slowly opening his eyes. She's there, staring down at him with a worry he's never seen. Her palm is soft against his cheek and he smiles slightly.

"You're a welcome sight. When did you return?" His voice is more hoarse than he'd like but he fights through it, carefully lifting his hand to cradle the side of her head.

There are tears in her eyes and Acrius’s brow furrows. "Don't do that. I'm fine."

She looks down, yet the tears fall and his features soften. "Come here," he sighs, guiding her close for a hug.

She resists at first, gesturing to his ribs but he snorts, "Lay where I guide you." She relents and he maneuvers her along his side, resting her head on his shoulder. "There. I'm not broken."

She smiles up at him and his chest clenches. Traveler, he loves it when she does that. He reaches down, tucking a strand of hair away from her eyes.

"I'll be alright, Hunter. Don't fret."

"...as your wife, it's my duty to fret." She manages, inclining her head into his hand.

"Using my own words against me. At least I know you hear them."

She lifts herself upright, placing a hand just beside his head to support her weight before she leans down, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

It's then he realizes his mask is not in place.

She can see the scars. The marred remains of his jaw and mouth. He starts to turn his head away, knowing it's too late and useless but she gently guides his head back.

There is no horror in her eyes. A warmth maybe. A gentleness he rarely is treated to as her eyes trace along his features.

"Why are you staring at me like that? I know you've seen worse but–" He hesitates, "This is not a sight you should have to endure. Hand me my mask."

"You broke that," she chuckles, leaning down to rest her forehead against his.

"I have another in our quarters. If you could–"

She kisses him then, silencing the thought in an instant and Acrius’s breath catches. Another kiss and his mind catches up, he gently grips her shoulder and presses her up a fraction.

"You don't have to pretend, my love." He murmurs, "I wouldn't fault you for…closing your eyes and doing as I asked."

She smiles, her eyes finding his own before she speaks. "There's nothing I'd hate to do more, Acrius. I love you, all of you. Scars included. You don't frighten me, nor does this," she presses a kiss to his jaw, over the most damaged portion of his face.

Acrius lets out a shuddering breath, his fingers smoothing along her waist as his eyes sag shut. He lets her kiss along his jaw, slowly, deliberately until she hovers over his mouth.

She's waiting for permission this time. Waiting for him to either push her away or tug her down but he doesn't have the heart to do either. Surely this is a torment to her?

"Do as you please," he murmurs, opening his eyes to find her focus squarely on his features.

"Tell me what you want." She coaxes, tilting her head in that adorable manner he loves. It makes her more endearing somehow and she only ever uses it when she's trying to convince him of something.

Right now, it seems, she wants to convince him that she isn't repulsed by his scars.

"Little One–"

"Do you want me to kiss you?" She asks softly, searching his eyes intently.

"I–"

"Yes. Or no, my Valus. There is no third option."

His breathing is shallow as he tightens his hold on her waist.

"Yes." He manages after a moment and her gaze softens. "I want you to kiss me, Little One. Longer than I'd like to admit."

"Then no more arguments." She smiles, almost smug about getting him to admit it.

"Get down here," he grumbles, a little sheepish about it now.

She obliges all too happily, kissing him deeply and Acrius groans his approval. His hand slides up her back, pressing her closer to him but the pain that tears through his frame is harder to ignore than he'd like and he eases up.

She's smiling, obviously aware of the consequences of his overzealous grip but it isn't enough for her to withdraw.

But when she does, when she lifts herself away with a warm smile, Acrius can't help gazing up at her as if drunk. Drunk on her affection. Her kiss. Her touch. Her.

She is more than he could have ever hoped for.

How did humans put these feelings into words? Ah, yes.

"I love you," he murmurs softly, tracing the length of her spine as his Hunter smiles down at him.

"I love you, too, Acrius."

The Young Wolf takes his hand and as she starts to speak, the medic makes an appearance.

"That mask shouldn't be off yet." He all but growls at Acrius.

"My breathing is fine." Acrius defends.

The medic glances at the Hunter, her face flushes as she diverts her gaze to their hands. "Yes, I could see that. What I don't see is you getting out of here for at least a week."

Acrius narrows his eyes, readying himself for an argument before his wife gently kisses his palm and lessens his indignance.

"We'll need you here until we can ensure your knee is still stable. The rest will heal unencumbered so long as you follow my restrictions."

"Your restrictions often require time away from combat. We can't afford–"

"She is immortal. You, Valus, are not. So if you hope to have any chance of lasting another few centuries with her, you'll heed my advice."

The Guardian chuckles softly, stealing a glance toward Acrius. She's smiling again but there's a brightness in her eyes. A gentle sort of excitement as she traces along his knuckles.

She's obviously just relieved he's alive. Which means, she'll back the medic and enforce the restrictions if he tries to defy them.

"Do I have your word?" The medic presses, leaning on the medical berth.

Acrius heaves a sigh, "For her…yes." He grumbles, squeezing her hand and she looks like she approves.

Good. He'll do whatever it takes to keep those tears away and keep that smile he enjoys so much.

"Right. I'll fit you for a brace later. For now, rest. Do not," he points at the Hunter, "get him worked up."

She feigns innocence as the medic departs and Acrius snorts.

"Worked up, huh? Been awhile since anyone has suggested that." He remarks smugly.

And her cheeks flush a second time.

"Getting flustered, Little One?" He teases, squeezing her hand.

"You should go back to sleep." She returns, squaring her shoulders. She's trying so hard to look unaffected but he knows better.

"Why? Just woke up and my wife is right here." He says and she swats his bruised forearm. He flinches but the smug smile doesn't falter.

"You're in no condition to be making suggestions." She snorts, "Focus on being able to walk first."

Her eyes drop to his hand, smoothing her fingers over his knuckles slowly. His smugness falters and he trials his thumb along her thigh.

"What are you thinking about?" He questions, watching her features with a degree of concern.

"I could have lost you." She manages, looking over at him. "If they hadn't--I wasn't here when you needed me. I–"

"You were exactly where they needed you, Little One."

"But not where you needed me."

"You're where I need you now," he smiles softly with a squeeze of her hand. “You are their greatest strength, their greatest weapon, Hunter. You cannot be all places at all times.” He guides her hand over his heart, watching her spine straighten a fraction, “But being here now? That is all I need from you, Little One.”

She smiles slowly, repositioning slightly to lay her head on his hip, smiling up at him.

“...Saladin said you wanted your knife given to me. Why?”

Acrius snorts, “Seems foolish now but…I wasn’t sure how grave my wounds were. I was hardly conscious when reinforcements arrived but,” he trails a finger up her arm, “do you know what all I could think of in that moment? When help arrived?”

“What?”

“You. And that damned guilt complex of yours.”

They both laugh, the Young Wolf presses closer, shifting her head up to his torso to be a little closer without laying on his ribs.

“I didn’t want you to think this was somehow your fault. The blade was, well…” His hand settles against the side of her head, stroking her hair lovingly, “I’m not sure. A memento, of sorts. Because if I were to die, I wanted it returned to you to remind you of me. I know it’s too large to suit its original purpose but you have a habit of carrying pieces of others with you. That…is the piece I’d want you to take of me. A weapon you taught me to use with a hilt you built yourself.”

“Of course,” he continues, smiling softly. “I knew you’d be inconsolable,” her cheeks flush and she smiles sheepishly. “In truth, I was more afraid of my death’s consequences for you. I never want you to blame yourself if something does happen to me while you’re away. Your role - it makes you irreplaceable. No one can fight as you do. Win the way you do. If I die fighting in your absence, know that I am unequivocally devoted to you and the fight we carry on.”

There are tears in her eyes but she nods all the same. Her fingers are bound around his wrist, her jaw clenched as she clings to him.

“Shh,” he murmurs, wiping a trailing tear away, “It’s alright. We’re alright.”

“You’re not leaving me that easily,” she murmurs, pressing her face against the palm of his hand. “Ever.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” He chuckles hoarsely. “Rest now. I’m sure you neglected yourself to get here quicker.”

She smiles, pressing a kiss to his skin and that’s all the confirmation he needs.

His Hunter won’t leave his side for a number of days, not without him practically ordering her to go shower and eat and just…exist beyond his bedside.

But there are no missions that she’ll accept. Not until she’s certain he’s well-tended to and close to being free of the medical bay. Not until Acrius initiates a kiss for the first time and tells her to go. To fight.

And fight, she does.

All the way to Eramis to put an end to this once and for all.

He couldn’t be more proud.

-----------------------

Taglists are open! Send an ask/leave a comment to be added!

Forevers: @halo-2 @reaped-winnower @forgotten-by-the-stars @sugarcoated44 @cayde-6 @aetosavros​ @niemands-bibliothek @paracausal-hunter @florence-and-the-machinegun

[disabled-dragoon]

I might need some advice. So Ive got diagnosed scoliosis and hypermobility. Now Ive git some bandages(recommended by my rheumatologist) for some of my joints to help a bit with stability and go to physical therapy (weekly) and to an osteopath (approx. 1 a month). Now I get quite alot of pain in my legs and back when standing for a long time and I love comic cons and concerts. I havent gone to some for some time due to covid and now Ive been to one con again (only 1 day) and it was... rough. Fun, but rough.

Do you have any thoughts about what could be helpful? Or maybe your followers?

Ah. Fun but rough. I get you, I get you.

Luckily pain is something I am well versed in XD

First up: General Pain Relief!

Heat:

Electric Blanket: 

I've never officially been diagnosed with hypermobility, buts it's likely I have it and the HSP just cancels it out. However, my brother has it in his back and shoulders, and, stubborn as he may be, the only pain relief he will use bar the occasional tablet is heat. Specifically his electric blanket just before he goes to bed. It warms the mattress and his back and alleviates the pain. Plus it builds up over time so it's not immediate heat all at once and acts on a large scale. Of course, electric blankets can sometimes be expensive, and obviously the energy crisis and lack of portability etc etc. But yknow, long term solution to work on pain in your down time. It’s brilliant for cold weather to, and they can be put on before you go to bed or go to sit down or whatever so that the object is warm before you rest. Can’t really be used outside of a home setting though. 

Heat Pack (microwaveable, snappable, etc.):

These can be a good, short term solution to pain and they are portable! Most of the time! They’re a good solution for concentrated pain and they tend last a little while. They do need to be reheated/replaced after a little bit though because they’ll cool down. But there are little ones you can carry around that snap a bit like glow sticks and fit in the palm of your hands. My mother has this microwaveable heat snake cushion thing that she swears by, especially for lower back pain and knee pain. There are different types so if this is something that interests you, maybe have a look into them. 

Hot Water Bottles:

Now the biggest problems with this option are they require the most work so far to use and can leak quite badly even when fastened. The tops can also be fiddly to use and I know sometimes they can burst. But for a cheap solution, and a portable one- they come in several sizes, with cases and they’re small enough to carry most of the time- they might be an option. Personally, I wouldn’t rely on these as the only option for pain? I mean they’re great! They do work shockingly well! But there are a lot of issues with them, and filling them up and/or carrying them can be incredibly dangerous especially if you’re having a bad pain day. But it’s still an option to potentially consider. 

Heat and Cooling Gels/Sprays/Creams:

Not ideal. Doesn’t always work. Can be dangerous and difficult to apply especially when alone. But they essentially work as a numbing agent and can be applied directly to the area of pain so long as it’s not a sensitive area i.e. the facial and genital areas. And again, they’re arguably the most portable solution so far so can be an alright solution to sudden pain on the go. The ones I use tend to be over the counter and though they don’t stop the pains in my shoulders and hips, they do help. Like honestly. Its a wonder. I wouldn’t use these alone, especially if the pain feels like it’s going to get worse/gradually becomes unmanageable, but for a bit of quick relief I’ve found them to be generally okay. ALWAYS CHECK ALLERGY ADVICE AND MAYBE CHECK WITH DOCTORS FIRST IF CONCERNED. 

Bedding:

Weighted Blanket*:

Listen. I swear by this. Honestly. I thought I wasn’t going to like it because I generally don’t like to sleep with heavy bedding but oh my god. Now I can’t sleep without it. It’s not completely effective but it’s damn good at what it does. And warm to! I mean, it’s never going to get rid of the pain oh but it does make it easier to manage. Am I being biased? Yes, absolutely. But it works. It does! It really helps cramp and back pain especially. I do love this option but it does have its downsides, unfortunately. They can be quite expensive sometimes so you might have to shop around a bit if considering buying one. They are also difficult to wash and, obviously, heavy so can be difficult to maneuver around. Sometimes lifting them, especially on a bad pain day, can cause more damage than they help. 

*(Also helps with general fatigue! So can be useful after a rough day!)

Pillows/Cushions:

Not incredibly effective sometimes but the right pillow can work wonders. Especially on the back and legs! It’s a quick method of pain relief when in the house, if there are pillows on hand, and can be relatively cheap. I think the biggest downside is that the effects will not last very long and it will probably have to be adjusted a good couple of times before finding a comfortable position. And obviously, the act of washing them and just the general availability and portability. They’re not really that great unless in the house, in a vehicle, wheelchair or in some kind of position where you’ll remain sedentary for a while.You can get medical cushions though! I think. Like ones specifically designed for certain pain types/areas, so maybe that’s something to bring up with a doctor or physiotherapist. 

----------

Medication:

Medicine: 

I know this isn’t everyone’s ideal option. It’s still not mine. In fact, at the time of writing this, I’ve only been on prescribed pain meds for a couple of months, and that was reluctantly. But they do work. They do. And they work quickly. They tend to be portable, especially in tablet or capsule form, and very discreet. If this an option for consideration, if not already prescribed, always, ALWAYS, talk to a medical professional beforehand. 

----------

Pain Relief on the Go:

So the above section is mainly dealing with pain at home after a rough day. I’ve got a couple of tips below for pain relief when out and about, like going to a con, for example! 

Regular Sitting Breaks: You said you get a lot of pain when standing and I understand that completely. I’m in the same boat. And I don’t want to sound patronising here so please note that I in no way mean for it come across like that if it does, but where possible you should always try to sit or find a place to sit. Always check the accessibility options for concerts, for example, and see if they could potentially arrange a space for to you to sit at safely so you could still enjoy the event. I know it’s a lot to ask but I genuinely feel like this should be a more available accessibility option. Maybe if you go to an event with someone, though rude as it may seem, see if they could keep a space in line for you if you need to sit down for a moment. Sit on the floor if needs to be. Whatever’s comfortable. And on that note:

Take a Companion: If possible. Someone you feel safe with. If they're comfortable with it and you're comfortable with it, they can provide some more stability (I.e. something to hold on to) when you're hurting, or may even be willing to run from point A to B for you for something if you need a moment or two to take a break. Also, a handy safety precaution in case you have also have a tendency to fall if you've been standing for a while.

Hydration: I know its not the same for everyone but I've found that I tend to hurt quicker/more if I'm not hydrated. Probably because I expend a lot more energy trying to move around than I should. So keep some water on hand where possible if you know you're going to be out for a longer period of time. If anything, it makes the pain a little bit more bearable.

---------

Mobility Aids

I know this isn't everyone's favourite option so I've kind of saved it for last for that reason, but I feel like it's definitely something to consider. From personal experience, they really do work wonders and they've made my pain so much more bearable. But I know it's a big thing to consider regardless, what with expenses, maintenance, learning how to use them etc.

Still. I like this option, and if you would like to consider this, I have a similar post that goes into greater detail about mobility aid options here. It was updated fairly recently!

BUT

I do have an option here that may be of interest to you:

Seat Canes!

[ID: A collapsible stool cane, in the stool position. The cane is unfolded to be a small, round seat, with three feet at the bottom and a long handle at the back. The handle and legs are golden, the stool, feet and handle are black./end ID]

Someone brought this up on a post a while back and I don't think I ever followed it up with them unfortunately. But I looked it up, and they do seem like a good option! Expensive though. But a very decent option, and I always say shop around so its possible to find cheaper ones.

Here are some more options just to give another example.

I swear by my cane honestly, and I think the addition of a seat is a good option for someone who struggles with standing for longer periods of time so perhaps it's something to look into. Portable, collapsible, might take a while to get used to but seems to be quite durable honestly.

----------

That's all I have at the moment but I'm sure there's probably something I've missed so please feel free to add anything else you think should be on the list!

[vannybarber]

The Prenup: Part Three

Summary: After four years of being together and finally being engaged, Chris wants you to sign a prenup.

Chris Evans x Reader

Warnings: angst, swearing, chris getting his ass handed to him, a lot of pain.

Part One Part Two

After Chris' little sob moment, he got his shit together and went back to where his family was. There was no way he was going to get you back crying like a baby when he was at fault. He needed to fix this, but you had to be on board in order first

He sits back on the couch, his mother and siblings not even realizing he entered the room, for they were having their own squabble. Scott's voice being the loudest out of everyone of course.

He sees his phone and goes to grab it. Carly notices him and speaks up.

"Chris is there anywhere you think she could be? Any place you guys have gone that's sentimental or something?" She's trying her best, but it wasn't enough. For all Chris knew, you could've been in numerous places. Everywhere you went was special.

When you both aren't working, you're on an adventure after another. You both loved to explore and were the perfect partners for each other to do it. You guys had traveled everywhere.

"I have no idea. I really fucked up and I don't even know where to begin to fix this" he breathes out, voice wavering gradually at every word. "Why do I always do this?"

It's Lisa's turn to speak up. "Do what?"

"Why do I always sabotage everything good in my life? Specifically love. It's like whenever it gets too good to be true, I back away. This time, I decided to wait four years to mess this up."

"Chris," Shanna calls. "You have a good woman." She pauses. "A great woman. She has put up with your shit and gave up so much to be with you. That's exactly what you wanted. Someone to really prove their love for you and she did that. You cannot go back on that now."

"Look how that's going." Scott doesn't fail to add a snarky remark.

"Scott I'm not going to tell you again. Quit it." Lisa barks and pops the back of his head. Scott goes silent.

"Okay but what if I messed up for good this time?" He looks up and straight at Shanna. "I have never seen her like this. I don't think anyone has ever hurt her this bad before." And he was right. You'd never experienced this much emotional pain before and the love of your life is to blame.

"Well you don't know that unless you find out. You can't just sit around here and feel sorry for yourself because believe it or not, you have no reason to." Shanna is completely right. Now it was up to Chris. But first he needed to figure out where you were.

He grabs his phone and goes to your contact. He finds you and clicks. All your info pops up and he debates on whether he should call or message. As he's deciding, his eyes wander lower to the location box. He sees your icon on the map.

His mouth opens, but nothing leaves it. Your location was on. It had been on the entire freaking time.

"Chris what's wrong?" Lisa walks over and the kids perk up.

"Y/N's location has been on all this time. I can see where she is now!" He clicks your icon and waits for it to load. A little hope has risen inside of him. One step closer.

"Well this is good. Now you can go to her. I just hope she doesn't want to kill you when she sees you." Shanna scratches the back of her neck because she knows what you're capable of.

Last year, your sister's boyfriend was messing around with your cousin's girlfriend and it got exposed at the dinner table infront of everyone.

Chris and his family had been invited and everything was going great. But then one of your other cousins decided to start some mess and pointed out how it was so strange that they were so close and always hung out together. They weren't wrong either.

Turns out they've been hooking up behind their backs for a while and all hell broke loose. Your sister and cousin are both very sensitive people. Their feelings get hurt fast and this absolutely tore them to pieces. That pissed you off and you went straight for the girlfriend. Then you went for the boyfriend but only got a kick to the spleen before Chris snatched you up.

She went to the hospital with a broken nose and dislocated jaw. The boyfriend had pain in his spleen for weeks on end. You apologized to the Evans' for your riveting hospitality, but Scott backed you up and stated that 'you did what you had to do'.

From that day forward, they did not get on your bad side. But you'd never hurt them. You had a great relationship with all of them. Something rare with in-laws. But not the Evans'.

Your location finally loaded and you were pinned at the Liberty, almost an hour from where you guys lived. Chris didn't even need to ask himself why you were so far away. He knew why.

"Okay I found her. She's at a hotel about about an hour away. Who knows what she'll do next, so I need to go right now." He moves to get his jacket and shoes. Slipping them on he grabs his keys and heads out the door, yelling an 'I'll be back soon' just before closing it.

Pregnant, tired, once again and alone. This should not be the case. You should be at home with your fianceé discussing how you'd break the news to your families about your new addition. But instead, there you are eating Domino's and binge watching the first and only season of a new show you found to get your mind off of things.

Its about a district attorney who's son had been found as a suspect for the murder of his schoolmate. What didn't help was the fact that the father, Andy Barber, looked almost identical to Chris. And the way Andy would interact with his son had you thinking about how he would react to your little surprise.

Would he be happy? Would it be too much for him? Seeing that you guys had just now got engaged after 4 years, you didn't see him too excited to add a baby in just yet. You hadn't even gotten married. Not to mention you just pushed that off the table.

You got your mind racing again, so you turned off the show and just sat quietly, succumbing to your thoughts. First, you guys needed to solve your problem before you tell him anything of the current events. Should you call him and tell him to come over? How were you gonna approach him?

Staying mad was off the table as soon as you saw the pregnancy results. You had to be mature for your new family. That meant pushing aside your anger and solving this prenup issue. Then you'd tell him about the baby. You just needed the chance.

And your chance had arrived when Chris pulled up to the parking lot of the hotel. Your icon was still at the location. He rushed to get out and inside, heading to the front desk.

"Hi! Is a Y/N Y/LN checked in here?" His fingers tap the counter in anticipation. The clerk is taken aback but checks the computer infront of him anyway.

"Uh, no sir there isn't anyone here by that name." The clerk shook his head and looked back up at him. Chris sighs and thinks. An idea comes to his head. It doesn't sound reasonable, but he had to at least try it.

"Okay um..how about a Y/N Evans?" The clerk looks back at the computer and types.

"Yes! There's a Y/N Evans in room 263 on the 3rd floor." Chris' heart leaped. You used his last name. After all that went down, you still went by his last name. He was gaining hope by the minute.

"She's my fianceé. Is there a way I could have a key to her room? It's super important" he begged.

"Well we're not allowed to give room keys out randomly. It's policy. But I could call up to confirm with Ms. Evans, if you'd like?" Chris accepted the offer, but not before correctly the clerk to calling you Mrs. Evans.

You jump slightly when you hear the phone ring. You stretch your arm and pick it up from the receiver.

"Hello?"

"Hi Mrs Evans! I have a-"

There was a pause before he continued,

"Mr. Evans down here at the lobby that wants to see you. Should I send him up?"

You swear in that exact moment all the saliva in your mouth dried up and your mouth was sealed shut. He had found you and and wanted to see you. But how? Anyways, you had to face him sooner or later. You freaking live together and you can't stay at that hotel forever.

"Mrs. Evans? Are you alright?" You snap out of your immobile state and clear your throat.

"Um..yes. You can send him up." You scold yourself for not putting up a bigger fight. But what for? It would only make shit worse than it already was.

"Alright ma'am. He'll be up shortly."

"Okay thank you." You quickly slam the phone on the receiver and let your body hit the mattress. Well, there's no turning back now.

You don't know how long you were laying there, but it couldn't have been long because you heard a knock at the door. You shoot up and stare at it.

Another knock.

"Y/N?"

You move your body towards the door taking a deep breath. You can do this Y/N. Get it together. This is Chris for goodness sake.

You turn the knob and pull the door back, Chris coming into view staring right back at you.

"Hi baby."

pls- this dramatic ass ending 😭 this was gonna be the last part, but dialogue/ just kept coming at me as I was writing 🥴.

tags:

@flattykawa1 @mayafatimakhan @attitude-times @shawn-youth @traceyaudette @fantasticinternetpizza @kyraroseficreblogs33 @radi0active-thoughts @youthought-iwasa-nicegirl @ohbarracuda @katelyneannxo @jennamarieee623 @nicochantez @craycraycraic @ilikeurdad @ppal3 @captainson-of-coul @joanne-stan @ilovetheeagles @cristinagronk16 @kelbabyblue @onyourgoddamnleft @jessycatth @misz-adrii @geminievans1 @saltyflowermakertaco @a-moment-captured @harrysthiccthighss @greatbatprofessordragon @dauntless2022 @f12sfm @allboutdatmarvel @ineedpineapple @illyrianprincess @ladycumberbatchofcamelot @thesecretlifeofdaydreamss @rubyztimetobeme @marianas-studyblr @icycheerleader @obliviatevamps @thevelvetseries @coffeebooksandfandom @shamelessfangirl-3 @quietmyfearswith @jennmurawaski13 @kissme-hs @lvgllre @secretmysteriousperson @arabescapr

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

Ok i got an monster tom x scientist reader au universe thing and no it does not take place in the red army base

Reader is a scientist and is asked to run some tests on a new specimen/monster they found, and when reader sees the specimen/monster they actually think it's kinda cute but then some other scientists shock him and even stick some needles in him and reader just feels bad for the specimen/monster at this point so nighttime rolls around and they hack into the cameras to shut them off and wear a mask so they won't get caught and go to the main room where the specimen/monster is they the reader introduces themselves to the monster the monster, thinking they're gonna hurt them, immediately backs off obviously scared and reader convinces the monster that they're not gonna hurt them and the monster shrinks as he's mostly human and says "your not gonna hurt me?" And they reassure him that they're not gonna hurt him and they sneak into the readers car and drives off the lab that the monster was in and reader asks what the "monsters" name is and says their name is "tom". Then reader makes a pit stop to a store real quick to get tom some clothes and then reader drives to they're home and introduces tom to their room and asks if they want some food/ take out or not an he says yes and they get some chinese food and watch some TV, after eating they both go to bed and reader suddenly finds themselves in Toms arms whimpering a little, and reader just kinda decides to pet his hair and rub his horns a little bit which make him purr then tom wraps his tail around reader and asks them to do it more and they do do that untill they notice that he's asleep then they both fall asleep.

Whew, I enjoyed writing this one ^^

Summary: Reader, a scientist, rescues Monster Tom from the lab that experimented on him and brings him home

...............

"Dr. [L/n], I'll let you oversee today's tests on TR-03."

"Alright, chief." You smiled awkwardly as your supervisor handed you the clipboard. It contained the subject's information: a one-eyed horned monster of an unknown species, though your colleagues have theorized it to be a demon. "What kind of tests are we running on it?"

"Resistance to electric shocks. There's evidence of uranium possibly circulating in its blood, so you'll be watching them extract samples as well."

As he explained, your smile gradually dropped as you looked over the information, seeing a ton of redacted information, including several incidents of the destruction it caused prior to its capture.

"So it's gonna be shocked and stuck with needles? Sounds painful."

"Its armor is thick, so it shouldn't feel a thing. Besides...I don't think you need to worry about whether it'll be painful for it." Your supervisor spoke in a rather condescending tone. "After all it's just an animal."

"I...yes, sir. I'll go oversee the tests right away." Not wanting to argue further, you just left his office and wandered through the building.

You were eager yet anxious to meet this monster.

Eventually you reached the area where the creature was being held, climbing up the stairs that led to the skybridge so you could look down into its holding chambers.

It was a massive dark purple creature, with two bright violet horns and a single black eye. Surprisingly it was allowed full movement, though judging from the many claw marks on the walls...it wouldn't surprise you if one day it was chained up to restrict such behavior.

You actually thought it was..kind of cute? It looked scary in pictures, but up-close it didn't seem as terrifying.

That only made you feel more pity for it as other scientists entered the chamber, clad in protective suits, with electric prongs and needles.

Almost immediately the monster seemed aware of what they were going to do, its eye widening as it stood on both feet and cowered in the corner. It growled in warning, only for a scientist to jab its leg with a prong in response, eliciting a roar of pain.

You physically flinched, feeling bad for the creature. But you took notes on its response to electric shocks.

Subject recognized equipment immediately, perceiving them as danger. Responded painfully to electricity.

Soon after being tortured, the monster seemed dazed, allowing another scientist in a hazmat suit to approach it and stick a needle into its hip. The vial of blood collected turned out to be red, with a glowing green aura.

As you took more notes, you heard a small whimper and looked down, seeing that the monster wasn't putting up a fight.

Instead it was...crying?

Sure enough, tears leaked from its eye as more of its blood was drawn, being electrocuted as some sick form of "sedation". It was hard to tell whether the people inside felt any sort of sympathy, but they just took their leave without saying a word to each other. Only a mere nod.

You didn't want to be here any longer than you needed to, so you finished your report and began heading back to your office.

Though you noticed the monster looking up at you, and you couldn't help but frown and murmur a simple:

"I'm sorry."

.............

After your shift was over, normally you'd go home for the night.

But on the ride home...you kept thinking of TR-03 and couldn't shake the images and sounds of its pain.

The way it responded to just seeing the prongs, and the way it looked at you as though it was begging for help, seemed far too human for it to be just a mindless animal.

Of course, you never questioned the secrets this lab kept--not wanting to be fired. But they seemed to be hiding a lot of stuff about this specimen, never speaking about its origins or even what it was capable of.

You may have only seen it for the first time today, but you wanted to know more about it. And you had a feeling that you won't get the answers you wanted by asking around.

Oh no..you were going to free it in order to find out the truth.

Not just to satisfy your own curiosity, but also because...the way it was being treated was far too cruel. To the point where it was crying.

You couldn't stand for this unethical treatment any longer. You had to do something..and be smart about it lest you got killed or worse.

After making a quick stop at a store, you found a mask and changed your clothes, completely disguising yourself. Then you got back in your car and returned to the lab, parking it somewhere far away so that you can sneak inside.

Fortunately you had security access in case any of the specimen breached their chambers. Thanks to your hacking skills you were able to disable every security camera you could find, putting them all on timers so they'd turn on later in the morning. You didn't want to rouse any suspicion.

That was the easy part.

The most important and difficult task lied ahead.

...........

As soon as you entered the monster's chamber, it woke up and grumbled with annoyance. Clearly it didn't like its rest being disturbed.

Though upon seeing you and the mask you wore, it tilted its head. "Grrrah..?"

"Shhh, it's okay." You whispered, removing the mask so it could see your face. While you were awestruck to actually see it up close and personal, you knew you had to keep calm.

But that might've been a mistake as it seemed to recognize you--the one who was watching it earlier today. It immediately backed into a corner, terrified as its chest began heaving with anxiety.

You couldn't blame it for its reaction, though your gently put your hands up and hushed it. "Please don't panic. I'm not here to hurt you. I wanna get you out of here."

"Hrrgrah?"

"Mhm." Smiling, you just pretended you could understand it. "I don't like how they treat you here. They call you an animal but..I know you're more than that."

The monster calmed down a little, before glancing up to the opposite corner. He made a noise of confusion upon seeing that the security camera's annoying red light wasn't blinking.

"I shut that off so nobody can hear or see us."

"H...ack..?"

You blinked, surprised that it could speak some English, but the fact it wasn't cowering like before was a sign it was trusting you. "Yep, I hacked the whole security complex. Now's our chance to escape, but..ah shit."

Suddenly, it never occurred to you: your mission was focused on getting to the monster, but you never considered how you'll get out with the monster.

"Damn..I'm not sure how we'll sneak you out without...." However, you trailed off as you saw it changing into a smaller form.

But it wasn't just shrinking, it was actually turning partially human.

How curious, nobody told you about that. Maybe that was part of the redacted information.

The monster turned out to be a human male, who still retained his horns, tail, and dark scales and fur, which covered his body. His brown hair was messy and spiky, and interestingly enough he had two black eyes.

He didn't have any clothes, obviously, so you took off your coat and put it around him. "So you're human, huh?"

"Your stupid friends' experiments wouldn't let me turn back for a while..." He grumbled in a slight British accent. "You sure you're not gonna hurt me?"

Understandably he got defensive, knowing you were working for the people who tortured him. But you shook your head. "No, I won't. I'm quitting this shithole and I'll take you with me." You took his hand reassuringly, noting that it was still clawed.

He gave you the tiniest of smiles in return. "Heh, glad we're both in agreement."

Soon you both quickly made your escape, luckily not running into any trouble. Your car was still parked right where you left it, so you got in and drove off.

You definitely won't miss working for that lab.

The roads were mostly empty at this time of night, so you were able to breathe easy knowing nobody's gonna chase you. Now seemed to be the best time to talk with the monster.

"So uh..do you have a name?" You spoke up. "I know they call you TR-03 but it doesn't feel right to call you that anymore."

"Tom." He answered as he looked out the window. "My name's Tom Ridges."

'Huh, that explains his code name.'

"I'm [y/n]." After noticing a nearby plaza, you saw a clothing store and decided to make a quick stop there. Tom seemed to be confused, and a bit worried when you left him in the car all alone, though you reassured him you were just buying some clothes for him.

He waited, trying to keep himself out-of-view in case any strangers got too nosy. But before long you were back, opening the driver's side as you peered in and sighed with relief, seeing him halfway out of the chair.

"Jeez, you scared me..thought somebody got you." You sighed, shaking your head.

"S-Sorry, not trying to get any unwanted attention. It's the last thing I need.." He sat upright, though he was surprised when you handed him a bag. Inside was a blue hoodie, boxers, and gray sweatpants. "Oh, cool."

'That's all he has to say?' His reaction was a bit underwhelming. 'Then again..maybe he hasn't processed that he's never going back to that hell chamber yet.'

You just shut the door and waited for him to get dressed, and when he tapped on the window you got back into the car. He definitely looked more comfortable now.

After giving him a smile, you continued on your way home, feeling glad that you rescued him from that place. You had no idea if he had any place to go, granted you don't recall seeing any information on his address nor any relationships.

So he'll stay with you.

...........

"Luckily I got a spare room. Excuse the mess." You chuckled as you showed Tom the extra room in your house, turning on the light. "You can stay here for as long as you'd like."

He nodded as he looked around, before feeling his stomach grumble. In embarrassment he put a hand over it, glancing at you. "Sorry..the food they had was shitty, I'm sure you knew."

"Yeah...you want takeout?" You took out your phone. "I don't feel like cooking tonight so I was gonna order some anyway."

"Sounds good."

"Alrighty, I'll call in the order. We can go watch TV while we wait."

Once more Tom nodded, following you into the living room space where you both sat down on the sofa. He sighed and leaned back, turning on the TV while you ordered some Chinese food.

This situation felt so...comforting and familiar..

For a moment he gazed at you, seeing you look through the menu.

He knew he wasn't the only prisoner back in that lab. So he couldn't understand why you'd choose him, of everyone you could've helped, but...he considered himself lucky.

For once he felt like he could let his guard down a little.

Some time later the food arrived to your house, and you both ate it while watching various TV programs. You asked Tom a bit more about his home life, though he didn't have much to talk about.

Whether he didn't want to say anything or forgot it thanks to the experiments was a mystery, but you wouldn't pry. You'll get your answers sooner or later, though not tonight.

Tonight you both deserved a good rest.

Afterwards you headed off to your own room, letting him know that he can knock on your door if he ever needed anything.

You got into your pajamas and crawled into bed, yawning.

It had definitely been an eventful day. You were eager to sleep in, knowing that you won't ever go back to your boring (and unethical) job.

But just as you had turned off the lights and dozed off, you heard your door creak open. With a slightly annoyed sigh, you sat up and turned on the lamp beside you, before seeing it was Tom.

"Tom? Your room is..."

Though you fell silent when you heard him...whimper? His eyes were white, indicating he was in some kind of distress.

But he crawled onto your bed, practically situating himself in your arms while making sure he didn't jab you with his horns. You were perplexed by his actions, though you finally realized..

He was just scared.

You held him in your arms, rubbing his horns soothingly and petting his hair, murmuring promises that he was safe. In response he nuzzled up to you, tail wrapping around your body as you both laid down.

You only stopped for a moment as he started purring, which made you chuckle softly. "Purring, huh? That's new."

"Can you keep doing that?" He grumbled, closing his eyes. "It was nice till you stopped."

"O-Oh right, sorry." You continued the previous motions, deciding to hum a small song as well to help him sleep.

Eventually you stopped once he dozed off completely, and your cheeks felt warm upon seeing how adorable he looked. 'And to think I was afraid of this guy?' You mused, before turning off the lamp light.

Soon enough you fell asleep as well.

If this is how Tom expressed his thanks...you'll take it.

[1-800-gaygentsofshield]

not her choice, part 2 | n.r.

part 2, part 1 here

summary: y/n and natasha will do anything for love, whether they realize it or not

warnings: nsfw themes, angst, brainwashing, violence, kidnapping, y/n and nat making dramatic calls, injury, basically "fuck" in different contexts

word count: 7,354

(sorry this is long I didn't want to split it up into more parts, not proofread as always)

(ALSO SIDE NOTE LOOK AT HER HANDS MY LESBIANISM IS FUCKING SCREAMING)

"You're pulling your punches." The man in stars, you now know as steve rogers, says as he stands across from you, nose bloody and shield in hand. You raise an eyebrow being your mask, as if asking him "You want me to stop?" After a pause, he nods his head and gets back into a fighting stance. "Please, continue."

Ever since that little..ahem..incident with Natasha, she's been telling you to not hurt her teammates, even though most of them have superpowers you might add, so you've been pulling your punches in fights ever since. You still beat their asses it was just..a lighter beating. You were treading in dangerous waters here, knowing that if Hydra suspects you even in the slightest bit they'll bring you back to the lab and wipe your mind again.

You dodge a swing from Steves shield and quickly knock him off balance, playing more defense than offense at this point. The Avenger quickly regains his traction and charges at you, tackling you to the ground so that the wind gets knocked out of you. You, as best as you can, try to dodge his punches on the ground, genuinely surprised when the asphalt underneath you sinks in with his punch. When his fist sinks into the ground once more, you grab his torso and use your legs to shove him off of you, landing a punch in that all-American boy face of his once you get on top of him. Instead of beating the man bloody like you would usually do, you shove yourself up and move away from him, trying to spot Natasha in all the chaos.

Your search stops when you hear Natasha's voice from behind you, her words being accompanied with a punch. "Hey." The punch isn't enough to hurt you but its enough to grab your attention as you turn around and grab her arm. Your grip is firm but not uncomfortable, letting Nat know that they hadn't brainwashed you yet. "Hey." You reply back, throwing a punch that she easily blocked. "You still with me?" She asks as her hand grabbing your wrist twists it back. "I let the guy with the metal arm beat me up twice, what do you think?" You say as you hit her stomach to make her stumble back.

The hits are hard but not fatal as Natasha moves to kick you in the stomach, you easily grabbing her leg and pulling her down to the ground. You land on top of her and you grin, "You've gotten soft, Romanoff." You tease in a breathy laugh as you see her quirk an eyebrow up. "Don't pretend like I can't kick your ass with my eyes closed, y/l/n." She says as she quickly shifts her weight and pins you down, an amused look on her face. "How come you always end up on your back when I'm with you?" She asks and you roll your eyes, scoffing but also realizing how true she is. Before you can reply there's comm's static in your ears, a Hydra officer barking the command to move out.

"I've got to go." You say as Nat gets off of you, hopping back up and making sure you've got your gun in it's holster. "Where will you be tonight?" Natasha asks as you fix yourself, her statement causing you to shoot her a teasing look under your mask. "You'll find me Romanoff." And with that, you turn and leave, not needing to look back to see the amused look on the red-heads face.

--------

"Couldn't find any more shitty hotels?" Natasha asks as she sees you standing behind a run-down gas station, chewing on some gum that you bought with the change you found on the sidewalk. "They were all booked." You shrugged, lips turning up a bit at the sight of your favorite person. "Mm, come here." Natasha hums as she reaches you, gently pulling you in by your chin to kiss you.

These secret meetings have been happening for a while now, being both beneficial to the two of you and the Avengers.

You immediately told Natasha about Hydra's plan about building the next atomic weapon soon after her head came up from between your thighs, the redhead listening intently as you spill all of Hydra's intel. That's when she told you about them, the Avengers, and how they protect the world from Hydra and otherworldly threats. She said she might introduce you to them sometime, saying that the people there don't see others for their worst mistakes.

At that point in time though, you didn't care what side you were on, as long as Natasha was there you would fight alongside her. That's how it was like for your entire life, not caring about the sides of good or evil, only ever caring about Natasha and keeping her safe.

You wince at her action and she pulls back immediately, a concerned look on her face as she looks for the cause of your pain. It's then when she sees the blossoming bruise on your jaw, right where her fingertips grazed when she pulled you in. "Who did this?" She asked and you shrug, reaching up to touch the purple and red spot. "The guy with the metal arm, it really packs a punch." You reply as you see the worry lines deepen between her brows, causing you to cup her neck and pull her in for a soft kiss. "I'm alright Nat." You whisper, kissing her a few more times before leaning back. "I've gone through worse." You say and she frowns, intertwining her free hand with yours as cars pass by. "Haven't we all." Nat sighs and you nod, running your thumb along the back of her hand.

-------

"Fuck! Tasha!"

You grip the back of the headboard as Natasha brings you to another orgasm, knuckle deep inside of you as she kisses your chest lustfully. "That's it, good girl." The redhead hums as your chest rises and falls, you trying to catch your breath as Natasha's fingers start to gradually slow down. Cum coats your inner thighs and sweat sheens your skin in regards to the many times Natasha has made you cum in the past few hours, finally deciding that you've had enough when she fully pulls her fingers out.

"God you have a lot of stamana." You laugh as your breathing finally calms down, moving your hand to pull her into a deep kiss. "I still have a lot more in me, y'know." Natasha hums as she moves to kiss your jaw, trailing it down your neck as she peppers kisses along the flushed skin. "I know just- just give me a minute." You breaths out as you let your eyes fluttered closed, liking the feeling of Natasha laying between your legs as she praises your skin.

It's not long after when your arousal starts to build again, deciding to take the initiative by gently bringing Nat's lips up to yours. "Natalia." You say breathily, your free hand intertwining with Natasha's hair. "Zachem tebe moy golub'?" She asks, heat pooling in her stomach as she feels you tug at her roots. "Ya tak khochu tebya trakhnut', Tasha." Your tone is filled with lust as you kiss Nat deeper, teeth tugging at lips and tongues meeting one another. "Mm bud' moim gostem." She hums and you grin, flipping Natasha over so she's on her back. You look at her for a second and smile, causing her to give you a curious look. "What are you looking at?" She asks with a small smile and you shrug, "You." You hum before kissing her, your teeth tugging at her bottom lip as your hands move down south.

"My god you're cheesy."

-------

"Nat, wait up." Steve catches up with Natasha as she's walking down the compound hallway, the assassin slowing down her stride as the super-soldier gets in step with her. That little action is enough to tell Steve to continue, taking a moment to contemplate his words before speaking. "So..y/n." He starts off slow to see Natashas reaction, deciding that it was okay when the redhead kept a straight face.

"What about her?" She asks and Steve purses his lips together, thinking for a moment before grabbing Nat by the arm and pulling her into a storage closet. "What the hell, Rogers?" Nat asks as Steve closes the door behind them, his voice going down to a whisper as he speaks.

"I know you've been seeing her, Tasha." He starts off and Nat only furrows her brows, looking up annoyedly at the man. "I don't know what you're talking about." She says and he raises his eyebrow. "You're not being discrete Nat. I've seen you fight before and what you do with her is not it. You've knocked down people twice your size before but let her fight you like it's some sparring session." Steve says and Natasha opens her mouth to interject. "She's trained with me in the Red Room, of course she's going to be on my level-" "And that too. After every encounter we have with them you disappear for the evening, usually not arriving until 3 am with Hydra information given to you by your "inside source."" He finishes and Natasha sighs, knowing that she's been caught.

"Okay fine, you want to know the truth?" She asks in a low voice and he nods his head, waiting for Natasha to give her explanation. "I've been- fuck- I've been meeting with her after missions. She used to be brainwashed by Hydra but she broke out of it, hence the reason she's giving me information on Hydra's plans." She says and he stays quiet, the puzzle pieces clicking together as Natasha continues. "I've missed her, Steve, after all these years so I go to make sure she's okay and..other things." Her sentence trails off as she doesn't want to reveal her sex life to her best friend.

"Other things?" Cap raises his eyebrow and Tasha rolls her eyes. "We..comfort each other in not safe for work ways." She says and Steve looks confused for a moment before his mouth opens in a soft "oh- ohhh." "Just please don't tell the team, Steve. You out of all people should understand what it's like to have someone you..care about..taken by Hydra." Nat says and Steve's face softens, a gentle sigh escaping his lips before a grin breaks across it.

"Is this love, Agent Romanoff?" He asks and she shakes her head, stepping back to grab the door handle. "Love is for children, Rodgers, this is just.." She pauses, trying to find the correct word for the situation that she's in. "Comfort?" He offers and she nods her head, opening the door fully. "Comfort."

------

You watch Natasha with curious eyes as she towel dries her hair, you only being dressed in underwear and a bra as you lay stomach-down on the bed. It had been a particularly hard fight that day, Hydra pushing to take bigger strides in their next big war machines. The Avengers, of course, came in and tried to stop them and they conveniently broke into the base that you were being held at.

You were there being punished for your recent behavior, Hydra officers treating you like an animal as they kicked and hit you. "It needs to be put back into it's place." They practically spat at you like you were some sort of monster, threatening you with knifes to your throat as they criticized every breath you took. The next time they send you into the lab, you know you're going to get brainwashed, waiting for the scale to tip as you sat there helplessly watching. You just found Natasha after years of suffering and you weren't too keen on forgetting her.

A soft hand against your back pulls you back into reality as you see where Natasha's soft gaze is looking at, her fingertips gently tracing the scars along your back. "What are you looking at?" You ask even though it's pretty obvious, Natasha's emerald eyes meeting yours. "Who did this to you?" She asks with furrowed brows and you shrug one shoulder. "You want me to give you a list?" You joke half-heartedly as she moves across the bed, gently straddling your back as you feel her fingertips map out your scars. The feeling makes you hum contently, your eyes fluttering closed as Natasha touches you like the most delicate thing in the world.

Nat has never been the soft type, choosing to show her love through reassuring shoulder pats and quiet comfort instead of gushy romantic acts. That's why it genuinely surprises you when you feel a soft kiss placed on your back, right where a stab wound was a few years ago. "I'm gonna kill every single one of them." She mumbles and you can't help the laugh that escapes your lips, your head turning to look over your shoulder. "I know." You hum, a feeling of déjà vu washing over you.

------

"Kto sdelal eto s toboy?"

Who did this to you?

Natasha's voice is clipped as she holds your chin with her fingers, seeing you try and blink back the tears that threaten to fall. Your nose is bruised and bleeding, the skin under your eyes starting to turn purple and red.

"Anastasiya."

Your voice is barely above a whisper as rage burns in Natasha's eyes. Anastasiya is one of the older girls in the Red Room, almost four years older than you and a good five heads taller. You had beaten her when you were sparring but as soon as no one else was looking she got you cornered, making the other girls her age hold you down as she took out her rage on you.

"Ona bol'she nikogda ne prikosnetsya k tebe, kogda ya zakonchu s ney."

She will never touch you again when I'm done with her.

You know that tone on Natasha, knowing that Anastasiya is going to have more than one bend in her arm when Natasha gets done with her.

"Nat, ne nado. U tebya budut problemy, i ya spravlyus' sam."

Nat, don't. You're going to get in trouble and I can handle myself.

Natasha's face softens a bit as she looks at you, her other hand coming up to rub your shoulder.

"YA znayu, pauchok, no pozvol' mne napomnit' yey."

I know, little spider, but let me give her a reminder.

-------

"But-" You start and she nods her head. "But you can handle yourself, I know." Natasha says, moving up a bit to kiss your shoulder. “No, what I was going to say was that they all died shortly after.” You say and she laughs softly against your skin, mumbling a “good girl” as she goes to kiss your cheek. Her lips conveniently land on the scar she gave you all those years ago, the thin line going along your cheekbone.

"That, you did yourself." You say teasingly but you can see her face drop a bit, her lips peppering over the scarred skin. "I'm sorry." She whispers but you shake your head, turning under her so you can face her. "It's okay Nat, we were young and they forced us to train with knives. Shit happens." You say nonchalantly, hands playing with the hem of her tank top. It's then when you see the scars on Natasha's skin, bullet wounds and cuts littering her skin. She notices your gaze and moves her hand down to hold yours, seeing your brows furrow.

You glance up at Natasha and feel your chest tighten as you see her look down at your intertwined hands, her thumb gently brushing up and down the back of your hand. "Your hands have changed." Natasha states under her breath as she glances up at you briefly, seeing you raise an eyebrow in question. "What do you mean?" You ask and Natasha holds your intertwined hands up.

"See, there's more scars on your knuckles and there's a new cut right here." She says and you nod your head, not really noticing the changes until now. "The last time I saw you, they were so much different." She mumbles and you raise an eyebrow, a slightly amused look on your face. "Since when have you paid so much attention to my hands?" You ask and she shrugs, your heart rate speeding up as you watch Natasha's fingers play with your own.

--------

"YA skazal tebe, chto u tebya budut problemy."

I told you that you'd get in trouble.

You hum as you gently grab Natasha's bruised hands, taking a ripped piece of cloth to clean up her bleeding knuckles.

"Oni sobiralis' rasskazat' o nas instruktoram."

They were going to tell the instructors about us.

Natasha winces as you wrap up her hands, carefully making sure that it isn't too tight as you tend to her injury.

"My mogli by spravit'sya s etim, Nat."

We could have handled it, Nat.

You sigh and Natasha shakes her head, her free hand moving to rest on her knee.

"No oni by nas nakazali."

But they would have punished us.

You nod your head and bite your lip, looking up into those green eyes as you hold her hand gently in your own.

"YA mog by prinyat' eto za nas oboikh."

I could have taken it for the both of us.

Natahsa's eyebrows furrow as she hears your words, her bandaged hand coming up to cup your cheek as the other grabs your free hand.

"Net."

No.

She gently brings your hand up to kiss your knuckles lightly.

"Net, ya ne pozvolyu tebe sdelat' eto dlya menya."

No, I won't let you do that for me.

You slowly move your hand to cup her cheek, Natasha's hand moving to cover your own.

"YA by vzyal na sebya mir za tebya, Natal'ya."

I would take on the world for you, Natalia.

Your words are a whisper but to Natasha, it was like a shout from the rooftops. The redhead slowly moves and kisses your hand that was resting on her cheek, causing a blush to dust your cheeks as she softly smiles at you.

"I ya dlya vas."

And I for you.

------------

Gently guiding her hand to cup your cheek, the both of you smile, you leaning into the warm touch as Natasha relishes the moment.

---------

You awake with a jolt as you hear heavy doors close outside of the motel room, it now being in the dead of night. Slowly moving from Natasha's arms, you go take a look outside, hoping to see that there's nothing. Your hopes are shattered when through the window, you can see the faint outline of a Hydra vehicle and multiple armed men, your heartrate spiking as you see the ones in white coats. "Shit." You hiss out as you start to pull clothes on, all of the rustling causing Natasha to awake. "Y/n?" She asks groggily as she sees you frantically moving around the room, hastily putting a shirt on and trying to find your weapon.

"Y/n what's happening?" She restates herself and is fully awake when you finally make eye contact with her, seeing the worry behind your eyes as you move towards her. "Nat, they're here." You rush out as you hand her some clothes, frantically trying to get the redhead out of here before she could get involved. "Whose here? Hydra?" She questions and you nod your head, feeling the bridge of your nose start to sting as reality comes crashing down on you. "They're here for me- shit- you have to go." You say as you try and pull yourself together.

"What? No, Y/n, I'm not leaving you again." Natasha says it like it's the most obvious thing in the world, pulling on some clothes and shoes. "Natalia this isn't fucking debatable, okay? I won't ever forgive myself if they get their hands on you." You say as you glance out the window one more time, mumbling a curse word as you start to see the figures close in. "Why are you acting like I can't handle myself?" Nat asks and you shake your head, opening a window opposite to the parking lot.

"I know you can handle yourself Nat, I've seen you fight hoards of threats and make your way out alive..I just don't want to pull you into this fight with me." You say before crossing the room and standing in front of Nat. "You've been the only thing I've cared about my entire life, please understand why I want you safe." Your voice is softer as you speak to her, her green eyes still prominent in the moonlit room. "What about you?" Nat asks in a whisper, a worried expression set across her face as you give her a watery grin.

"You know I never die, Natalia." You say as she shakes her head. "I'm like a cat and my lives haven't run out just yet." You continue and a laugh breaks past Nat's lips, causing you to smile even as a tear runs down your cheeks. "There it is." You breathe out and she looks at you questioningly. "What is it?" She asks. "I just wanted to see your smile one last time." You reply as you kiss a tear from her cheek, Natasha then moving to gently kiss your lips. The kiss is soft and passionate, you both trying to communicate to each other a message you both aren't ready to say yet.

Sooner than you'd like, the two of you break away, both of you giving the other a watery smile as you sniffle. "I'll come back to you, Nat. I promise." You whisper and she nods her head, gently kissing your temple as your eyes flutter closed. "You better, or else I'll beat your ass." She says and you give a shaky chuckle, hearing the Hydra men starting to kick down apartment doors. "I'm planning on it."

Hydra doesn't take long to storm the motel room, quickly seizing you before you had a chance to react. You were happy to comply with them until you saw them grab Natasha's arm, you immediately tearing from the Hydra agent's grip to tackle his ass. You successfully break his arm but aren't so lucky when you feel a wave of electricity shoot through your body, every muscle tensing up as you fall to the floor. "Fuck." You curse through gritted teeth as you force yourself to get up, looking at Natasha with desperate eyes as she hasn't left yet.

"Go!"

As the words leave your lips, both of you could almost see each other back on that mountainside, the dead bodies of the other girls littered around you as you kill another one for Natasha to escape. It felt like you were a teenager again, seeing Natasha teeter between staying and leaving as she stood at the treeline. A grunt of pain leaves your lips as one of the men shoves you into a desk, the wood breaking underneath you as air rushes out of your lungs. You've only taken down a few men, stabbing one of them in the throat with their own knife. As they start to overwhelm you, you take one last look at Natasha, seeing as she's taking one last glance at you as her hands rest on the window frame. As you lock eyes with her, you say one simple phrase.

"It's okay."

-------

Natasha isn't paying attention at all in the meeting the next day, not getting the image of your worried look out of her mind. “Romanoff, did you hear me?” Tony asks and her eyes glance upwards, the other Avengers looking at her as they await her answer. “Sorry, what?” She asks and Tony sighs, pointing towards a highlighted point in the mountainside. "From the information we've gathered, Bruce surmises that the next Hydra base is here, the building located about thirty feet below the surface." He explains and Natasha nods her head, her attention immediately being drawn when the word Hydra slips past his lips. "I was asking your opinion on how we should enter the compound without getting caught." Tony finishes, waiting for Natasha to give her input as he sees the gears turning in her head.

"It's the compound that they use for their experiments, right?" She asks and Steve nods his head, Nat sighing as she looks at the dot on the map. "Well considering that it's underground they only need security for the entrances and exits, probably have a few patrolling the perimeter..I think our best entry point is here." She says, standing up and pressing a pen to the western side of the mountain. "Of course, we always have the risk of getting caught but it's lower than just walking through the front door." Natasha explains and all of the Avengers nod their head, she's not a trained soldier but she's a damn good spy if they've ever seen one.

------

"Nat, are you alright?" Steve asks after everyone clears out of the conference area, grabbing the assassin's arm before she leaves. "They've got her, Steve." She says and his eyebrows furrow. "Who?" He asks and Natasha sighs, looking up at the super-soldier. "Y/n. They took her last night." She explains and Steve sees the worry on his friend's face. "Do you think she's at the base we're going to?" He asks and Natasha shrugs her shoulders, "I don't know, but if she is there I'm gonna tear up the whole place until I find her." She says and Steve nods, seeing the determination in Nat's eyes. "We'll get her back Natasha." He says and Nat grins a bit, "I know."

-----

It's easy, almost too easy, getting into the Hydra base, Natasha only taking out five guards patrolling the area and guarding the entrance. "This doesn't feel right to me." Steve says as they head towards the entrance, the fresh snow crunching under their boots. "Nothing ever feels right to you, Cap." Hawkeye says as he flys overhead, making sure no Hydra agents get the jump on the pair. Natasha only quirks her head to the side when Steve makes eye contact with her, agreeing with both men as they reach the entrance. Natasha scans the entry card that they swiped off the guard and the door opens, immediately granting them access into the underground base.

-----

"Give her a sedative." One of the doctors commands as you continue to struggle, hitting anything you could reach as they try to strap you onto a stretcher. They've been touring and interrogating you the entire night, bargaining for information instead of brainwashing you.

"We saw that Avenger in the motel, tell us what you know and we won't wipe your memory." They say but you only clench your jaw and stay silent, ripping yourself from their grip each time they try and contain you.

"Don't you fucking touch me!" You grit out as you knock one of the men unconscious, kicking the stretcher away from you as you watch the doctor run to grab a sedative. Your body is covered in blood and bruises, still putting up a fight since you were taken a day ago. Getting shoved up against the wall you cry out in pain, your head getting aggressively slammed against the wall. You don't even realize the doctors came back with a sedative until you feel the prick of the needle in your neck, your vision going blurry as the fight leaves your body.

You don't put up a struggle as they drag you onto the stretcher, strapping your arms and legs down as everything moves in slow motion around you.

You know where they're taking you. You know you're about to get brainwashed.

As they push you down the hallway, you slowly close your eyes and try to burn the image of Natasha's face into your mind, feeling slightly calmer as you think of her wrapping you up in her arms and telling you that everything is going to be okay.

The next time you open your eyes, you're strapped down into the metal chair that they use for brainwashing, feeling like you're a shell of a person as you look down at your restraints. They force a piece of plastic into your mouth as you blankly stare at the doctors in white coats, only one thing on your mind as they prep the machine.

Natasha.

A tear rolls down your cheek quietly as the restraints latch onto you tighter, forcing you to lay back as your breathing starts to get heavier.

It never gets easier, the brainwashing, knowing that you'll only be a puppet to Hydra with no free will.

The metal paddles clamp around your head and your heart rate spikes, hearing the doctors beside you start to say the words you always dreaded to hear.

"Snow."

"Sixteen."

"Red."

With each word, you could feel the control leaving your body, bracing yourself for the pain that's going to come next.

"Ballet."

"Redback."

"Knife."

A scream rips from your throat as pain surges through your body, the machine being activated and making you pull against the restraints. Your vision fades in and out of focus as you continue to scream, every muscle in your body tensing as the brainwashing takes over.

You try your best to fight the pain, your mind trying desperately to hold onto the memory of Natasha as your trigger words reach your ears.

Natasha.

Natasha..

Natasha..?

Natalia?

Natalia..

No, it's Natasha.

Nat?

Natasha.

Natalia.

...

...

who?

Your eyes are blank as the machine finally releases you from its grip, a scientist having a pleased look on his face as he walks up to you. "Just to make sure this doesn't happen again." he says before commanding you to put your head forward, gripping your hair as he presses a cool metal gun to the back of your neck. With a click you could feel something being put into your neck, the new object feeling irritating under your skin. It's a small chip, maybe a quarter wide, and it's now attached to the nape of your neck, the needles embedding into your skin to make sure it stays in place.

"Are you ready to comply, Agent 809?" He asks and you nod your head, suddenly hearing alarms go off that there's been a security breach in the compound. "Say the word, sir, your wish is my command." You say and he grins, grabbing your chin. "Kill the Avengers." He says and you look at him in the eyes. "Main target?" You ask and he thinks for a moment, looking at the Hydra officers before looking back at you. ''The Black Widow."

------

Natasha hears your screams ring through the compound and she feels her blood run cold, Steve grabbing her arm before she could do anything stupid. "Natasha, don't." He says in a harsh whisper and she shakes her head, pulling herself from her grip as she continues to move down the hallway.

She quickly takes down the next few guards that she sees, not using her bullets yet so they don’t cause the rest of the base to be alerted of their presence. That plan doesn’t last long though when a guard gets the upper hand on her, causing her to shoot two bullets into his chest and making him drop. As soon as the shots are fired, alarms go off across the compound, causing Natasha to curse under her breath. “Language.” Steve says and Natasha rolls her eyes, picking up her gun and racing down the hallway to try and find you.

———-

Natasha kicks down a set of double doors and shoots the people inside, scanning the room for any sign of you. They've gone through 95% percent of the compound and haven't found you yet, Natasha getting more and more anxious as time goes on. "I heard her, I swear." She tells Steve each time they clear an area and come up empty.

It isn't until she sees you strapped to the chair that she lets out a breath of relief, you seemingly normal accept for the cuts and bruises. "Y/n, oh god you're okay." She breathes out as she reaches you, seeing the dazed look in your eyes as she undoes your restraints.

"I'm sorry." You whisper out in a last-ditch attempt to warn her before your chip clicks on. "Sorry? You're sorry for what?" Natasha asks but doesn't get a chance to reply before you knock her backwards, tearing out of the remaining restraints as you stand up.

The wind gets knocked out of Natasha and Steve gets into a fighting stance, you not even giving him a glance as you head towards Natasha. Steve quickly intervenes and throws his shield at you, your hand sticking out to grab it before tossing it to the floor. "That's all you've got, Capitan?" You sneer teasingly as you grab a knife from the table, getting a swing on him and clipping him in the cheek.

The super soldier quickly hits back though, kicking you in the stomach and making you stumble back. You quickly grab one of the cords that was attached to a computer and you wrap it around the Avenger's neck, maneuvering yourself so that you're behind him and pulling tight.

Stumbling backwards, he throws himself up against the wall, successfully breaking your grip as you get pinned between the wall and the Avenger. Steve quickly turns and pins you up against the wall by your neck, pulling his fist back to punch you. "Steve!" Natasha hisses out his name harshly and he turns to look at her, temporarily forgetting that you're brainwashed. He groans and tosses you to the floor, seeing the glowing chip on the back of your neck. You quickly get back up and go for Natasha, the redhead dodging your swing and making your fist go through the wall. "Y/n. Stop it." Natasha grits out as she grabs your arm and twists it behind your back, a hiss leaving your lips as you feel your muscles pop.

"Who. the fuck. is y/n?" You spit out as you maneuver yourself around and hit Natasha back, grabbing her throat and tossing her up against the wall. "They want me to kill you, so that's what I'm going to do." You say as you grab a beaker besides you, breaking it to create a shattered edge. You're about to swing the bottle when Steve comes up behind you and hits the back of your neck with his shield (and you swear later on that if he did it any harder your neck would have snapped). A cry of pain leaves your lips as the chip sparks and you stumble forward, your head bowing into Natasha's shoulder as pain surges through your body. Natasha freezes as she sees your shoulder slump, a small whimper of "Natasha." leaving your lips as the chip short circuits. "Y/n?" She asks and she sees your hand come up to grip at the back of your neck, your other hand dropping the shattered beaker. "Nat. The chip." You breathe out as you feel it starting to take hold again, pushing yourself away from her as your mind clouds over again.

"Steve, hit the chip again." Natasha commands and Steve nods his head, watching as your shoulders tense up again as you attack Natasha. She quickly blocks all of your hits and flips you over onto the floor, you quickly gripping onto her arm and pulling her down onto the floor with you.

The chip sparks again and for a second you regain control, scrambling up to the control panel and enabling the emergency demolition program. "What are you doing?" Steve asks and your jaw tenses, shutting all of the Hydra officers inside by locking all the exits except one. "I'm blowing this place up." You mumble, jaw tensing as the chip revs up once again. "I've locked all of them in, if you go to exit c9 that'll be the only one unlocked so you can escape." You say as you lock all of the doors inside of the compound, keeping all of them in place so they can't run.

"What about you?" Natasha asks as she gets up from the floor, looking at the chip flicker on and off. "The chip will take over sooner or later, I'd rather die in this explosion than let them use my body again." You say as you grip the side of the table, everything in your body being split in two with each side fighting to take control. "No you're not, we're getting you out of here." Steve says and it genuinely surprises the both of you, the man in stars grabbing your arm as you slam the button down to activate the explosion.

T-minus: two minutes

"I don't deserve to get out of here." You shake your head as you look at Natasha's neck, now bruised with your handprint as you wince. "I've hurt you, I've hurt her, I've hurt so many people. All of it is on my hands." You say and Natasha shakes her head, grabbing your hand and kissing the back of it gently. "I've left you once, Y/n, I'm not letting you go again." She says and you think for a moment, alarms blaring around you as you see the pleading look on her face. "Alright." You whisper, allowing Natasha to pull you out of the room as Steve follows close behind you.

You run down the hallway as you guide the two other Avengers towards the exit, quickly taking out any Hydra agents that gets in your way.

"There! There it is." You call out as you see exit c9, all three of you running towards it as the speakers count down.

T-minus: thirty seconds

The chip fully kicks back into gear as your eyes widen, your strides slowing down as it feels like someone wraps restraints around your body. "No, no no no. Please not now." You beg to yourself as both Steve and Nat notice, your eyes turning dead as your legs start to carry you away from the exit. "Oh no you don't." Natasha grits out as she tackles you, dragging you towards the exit as you fight against her.

Twenty five..

"Let go of me!" You hiss as you tear from her grip and Steve lingers near the exit, watching the interaction happen as a metal curtain starts to descend over the only open exit. "I'm taking you home, Y/n." Natasha says as she grabs onto your body, Steve moving to keep the door open as he calls the two of you to move.

Nineteen..

"Steve! Go!" Natasha yells out as she drags you towards the exit, blocking each hit you try and swing at her. Steve shakes his head and calls out over the alarms, "I'm not leaving you two!"

Natasha looks at him and shakes her head, being only ten feet from the exit. "Just go! I'm right behind you." She says and Steve reluctantly steps through the exit, the now dented metal sheet continuing to close on the two of you.

fifteen..

fourteen..

"Y/n please, stop fighting me." Natasha begs as you tear out of her grip again, heart-pounding as the alarms fill her head. "Why should I listen to you? You left me. You were everything to me and then you just left me!" You ask harshly as you see the tears in her eyes, Natasha seeing the real you starting to break through. "I didn't want to leave you, Y/n! I'm sorry!" Natasha's voice raises a bit in volume. "I wanted you to come but you were stubborn and stayed behind for me! You stayed behind and when I went back to you..you were already gone." She says and the gears turn in your head. "Then why are you here? Why are you going through so much trouble for me when you have a perfectly good life out there?" You ask, your body still tense as Natasha looks at you with an open mouth. "Because.."

Five..

Four..

"Because.."

Three..

Two..

"Fuck." Natasha doesn't finish her thought as she grabs you and holds you close to her chest, turning you so that your body isn't the closest one to the blast.

One.

The explosion shakes the ground as the two of you get tossed through the air, your body hitting the metal door with a thud. The ground shakes above you as the base comes apart, Steve pulling the metal curtain open and dragging the two of you out into the snow.

Natasha is coughing fiercely as the smoke and dust enters her lungs, gripping onto you for dear life as she feels Steve dragging the two of you out. Your blood stains the snow as Natasha sits up, heart dropping to her stomach as she sees your head loll back limply.

"Shit, Y/n!" She says as she taps on your cheek, blood running down her temple as she checks for signs of life. Your heartbeat is slow and your breathing is labored but you're alive, that final hit allowing the chip to fully break in half on the back of your neck. "It's because I love you, you idiot." Natasha whispers as she gently kisses your temple, Steves's jaw setting as he sees the little interaction.

------

The next time you wake up, you're in a sterile white room, your heart rate spiking as you think you're back in the Hydra lab again. Trying to push yourself up, your hands get stopped by restrains, the same straps tying down your legs. Swallowing thickly, you look around the room, the atmosphere making you feel vulnerable as you try and undo the restraints. A door opens to the right of you and panic seeps into your bones, thinking that it's a doctor coming in to run experiments on you again.

"Hey, it's okay." Natasha's soft voice reaches your ears as she comes over and undoes the restraints, gently freeing your legs and wrists before looking up at you. "I'm sorry, Bruce put them on for precaution." She says with a soft smile, taking a knee beside your bed so she's at eye level with you. You don't say anything as you move to hug her, your head immediately finding residence in the crook of your neck as you take a shaky breath. Your body aches and you're pretty sure you look like shit but you're so fucking happy that Natasha's here.

"Nat." You whisper softly as Natasha's arms quickly wrap around you, being careful to not hurt you as she closes her eyes. "I'm here, moy golub', I'm here." She whispers and you almost break down at that nickname, your arms tightening around her. "You're safe Y/n, you're free." She whispers and your mind can't even process her words, your only thoughts being how nice it feels to be wrapped up in Tasha's arms again.

When you pull away, there are tears in your eyes, Natasha gently wiping them away and kissing your cheeks.

"YA lyublyu tebya."

I love you.

The words slip from your lips before you could even process it, your eyes widening as you see the unreadable look on Natasha's face. "N-Nat, I'm so sorry, I didn't-" Natasha cuts you off with a kiss, gently pressing her lips to hers as she grins.

"ya tozhe tebya lyublyu."

I love you too.

---

"Should we do something about that?" Tony asks as the team looks through the one-way mirror they placed in your room, seeing Natasha climb into your bed and pull you into her chest. Your eyes close as you contently settle yourself into her, Natasha's hand rubbing circles along your back.

"Give them a break Tony, it's not like she's going or hurt anyone." Steve says as Bruce holds up the chip implant, "Yep, no more brainwashing for her." He says as the rest of them look at the two of you, never seeing Natasha this content until now.

[todomitoukei]

Japanese vs. English Dabi A 293 Comparison

Chapter 293 gave us another great speech by Dabi, filled with all kinds of information. Similar to my post for the previous chapter, the official translation for chapter 293 has, unfortunately, once again made some changes in regards to Dabi’s speech due to its bias that I would like to share and explain here to give a better understanding of Dabi’s actual character rather than just leaving it at his American version.

Because Dabi said so much in this chapter and we will be comparing the panels from the Japanese version and the official English translation and taking apart the Japanese phrases, the rest of the post is under the cut (this post may or may not be just below 6k words)

The interaction begins with a short exchange between Dabi and Shouto as the former is hugging his younger brother mid-air while the others are still on the ground trying to take down Machia. In the official translation, Dabi begins by pointing this situation out to Shouto.

The two panels aren’t too different from the Japanese version, but this is another case of lost nuance. So here’s the original for comparison:

The speech bubbles read:

「向こうは楽しそうだなァ」

「可哀想になァ」

「おまえはこんなに辛いのに」

Breaking down the first line we get

「向こう ; mukou」-> other side; other party

「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle

「楽しそう ; tanoshisou 」-> looks fun

「だ ; da 」-> casual form of です (desu); be; is

「なァ ; naa 」-> sentence ending particle; expresses emotion/sentiment

= “The others seem to have fun, huh?”

Then we have the second line:

「可哀想に ; kawaisou ni 」-> pitiable; poor (interjection)

「なァ ; naa 」-> sentence ending particle; expresses emotion/sentiment

= “Poor thing, huh?”

And the third line:

「おまえ ; omae 」-> you

「は ; wa」-> topic marker particle

「こんなに ; konnani 」-> so; like this

「辛い ; tsurai 」-> bitter; painful; heart-breaking

「のに ; noni」-> even though

= “Even though it’s so painful for you.”

Someone made a post a few days ago where they made an interesting note about this part, specifically that last line, that I think is worth mentioning here: this situation is Dabi comparing his own past to Shouto’s present. Touya was in pain for so long until he burned to death because no one helped him (and by that I mean an adult that could’ve actually helped him and not his younger siblings). Similarly, Shouto has been in pain for so long and now that it’s especially obvious to those around him as he is in the process of being burned, no one is helping him and instead, they continue fighting each other. And while Dabi doesn’t know the extent of this, it’s true that Shouto has been vocal about his family’s circumstances and yet no one’s ever done anything about it. So while Dabi at this moment is primarily referring to the fact that in this very instant no one is immediately by Shouto’s side to save him, it’s also unintentionally pointing out how no one in charge ever looked at the teenager with a huge scar on his face who openly hates his father so much and thought to maybe at least ask him about it.

You can argue that that is interpreting too much because “Dabi doesn’t care about him” - but I think that Dabi not knowing enough about Shouto and seeing him as nothing but “Endeavor’s doll” and Dabi recognizing that Shouto is in a similarly bad situation as Dabi are two statements that can coexist, especially since he is right in saying that right there no one is helping Shouto. And, again, based on his broadcast and how much his speech has changed to be more polite and humble in contrast to his usual direct, rough ways, it’s important to recognize that Dabi has an understanding of people (and how to get to them).

So while his mind might be too focused on his hatred for Endeavor, there might also still be that ability to acknowledge that those around him are hurting, too. This is an important problem within the fandom (and outside of it) as far as vocabulary goes - a lot of people throw around the word empathy and how awful it is when someone lacks it. But empathy is the ability to feel someone else’s emotions. And you don’t need to actually feel what they are feeling in order to recognize their emotions, which is far more important. This understanding of someone else’s emotions is sympathy. Compassion, on the other hand, is not just understanding someone’s emotions, but also trying to alleviate someone’s negative emotions. So even if Dabi doesn’t care about people, he can still recognize when someone is in pain.

After this, we get Shouto’s only line of that chapter, and as much as I wished he was given more lines, this one’s so good, it’s okay there isn’t more:

Above you can see the English translation having Shouto say “But... you’re... burning up... too!”

For comparison, here is this same part in Japanese:

Starting with Shouto’s line, we got「てめェ。。。こそ。。。体が。。。焦げて。。。！」

This line already broke itself apart! How nice.

「てめェ ; temee 」-> you

「こそ ; koso 」-> for sure; emphasizes preceding word

「体 ; karada 」-> body

「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle

「焦げて ; kogete 」-> to burn; to get burned (the dictionary form of this is 「焦げる」(kongeru), the te-form is used here to leave the sentence trailing)

= “YOUR body... for sure… will… get burned…!”

The reason I’m saying this line is so important is the emphasis on the “you” part through the usage of koso. The general content of the sentence already tells us this, but that emphasizing nuance doesn’t exist in English (unless you bold, italicize, and underline it). The line is important because we’re shown someone who is in the process of being burned alive, and yet his worry is on the person trying to kill him rather than anything else. He isn’t trying to argue with him, isn’t trying to protect himself - he’s simply saying: this is hurting you. It’s interesting because in the eyes of those around him, Shouto is the one hurting the most. But to him, it’s Touya who is hurting the most. To him, this isn’t the hero-to-be Shouto being fought by the villain Dabi. This is big bro Touya hurting himself for the sake of getting at their awful dad. And little bro Shouto is only thinking about his big bro.

Now for Dabi’s response, we get the line that particularly stuck out to me as far as the English translation goes: “Seriously, it’s great that you were raised with love.” What? If you read the fan translation, you might remember this line as “You’ve grown up to be so considerate - I’m happy for you little bro” - so which one is more correct? If you guessed the fan translation then, unfortunately, you are correct! 

The Japanese line reads 「優しく育って嬉しいよ」

「優しく ; yasashiku 」-> ; tender; gentle; kind (adverbial form of「優しい」(yasashii))

「育って ; sodatte 」-> to be raised; to grow up; (te-form of「育つ」to indicate reason & means (this part results in the second part of the sentence))

「嬉しい ; ureshii 」-> happy; glad

「よ ; yo 」-> sentence ending particle; shows emphasis

= “I am glad because you grew up kindly”

First of all, an adverb is nothing other than an adjective that is directly affecting/describing the verb it precedes. So to understand that in reference to this sentence, you can ask the question “how was he raised?” - with the response being “kindly.” If you wanted to say “raised with kindness” on the other hand, you would have to turn the adjective into a noun. That part of the phrase would then be 「優しさで育って」As you can see, that’s not what it says in the original version.

More importantly, the word “love” is not part of this, so I don’t know why that word is used here. It really gives off a wrong understanding of what is actually being said here. The official translation makes it sound like Dabi is saying “I’m glad you were raised with love, while I wasn’t” sort of like a complaint?

We still don’t know exactly what Touya’s upbringing was like, but we do know that things gradually got worse over time, so with the assumption that he was raised in a more positive (not good, just better in comparison) environment than Shouto, the English statement then doesn’t make sense since he was “loved” too for a long time.

Besides, he is saying that in direct response to Shouto displaying his worry for Dabi, which says nothing about how he was raised but everything about what kind of person he is (a kind one).

Furthermore, it leaves out the part where Dabi says he’s happy about this. Instead, he just says “it’s great” - which is more something used when you can acknowledge a situation being good for someone else, even though you don’t have any particular feeling about it. It’s very objective, yet in the original, he is stating his emotions with this.

The official translation, in my opinion, just ends up turning the two against each other (more specifically turning Dabi against Shouto), when in reality, Dabi is happy that Shouto shows compassion for him here, despite Dabi currently trying to kill him. In other words, he is surprised by Shouto’s concern for him and happy to be proven wrong about him.

Next, we got「俺は大丈夫今とても幸せだから。」

「俺 ; ore 」-> I

「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle

「大丈夫 ; daijoubu 」-> alright

「今 ; ima 」-> now

「とても ; totemo 」-> very

「幸せ ; shiawase 」-> happy

「だから ; dakara 」-> because (indicates a reason for something)

= “I’m alright, I’m really happy now, so...”

There are two things to note here in relation to the previous phrase. First of all, notice how both phrases include the word happy. In the first phrase, the Japanese word is ureshii, whereas in this phrase it’s shiawase. Once again, this is a question of nuance.

Ureshii is more of an immediate feeling that you feel in that exact moment. It’s a feeling that isn’t going to last forever (for example the joy you feel when you receive a gift).

Shiawase, on the other hand, is a long-term happiness.

The way to interpret why he is using both these terms is that he uses ureshii as his reaction to Shouto showing that he cares. He most likely didn’t anticipate for Shouto to say something like that, so signaling his concern for Dabi made the latter feel joy in that very moment.

So what about the happiness he talks about in the second phrase, how is it different from the first one? Clearly, Dabi is not exactly someone you would describe as happy when looking at the overall picture. I think one possible explanation as to what the shiawase here refers to is that Dabi has accepted his situation. While it wouldn’t be accurate to describe his state as one of having moved on from the past - clearly - at the very least, through admitting to his past and having distanced himself from that dark place, he has been able to now be in a better situation, where he is allowed to just live rather than trying to prove himself to someone day after day.

The second thing to note is that you might be wondering why I ended the sentence with “...” when the official translation is “I’m fine, because I’m really happy right now.”

Well, it’s kind of an odd sentence, isn’t it? The sentence as it is right there is just giving us a reason. But a reason for what? In Japanese, it’s okay to omit the main clause (the phrase that would follow after this to explain what you just gave a reason for) when it’s obvious what you’re talking about.

This confused me for a little bit until I thought about what sentence came before this one. Right before this Dabi says “I’m glad you were raised kindly.” The sentence we’re looking at right now is an extension of that. And what came before that sentence?

Shouto saying: “Your body will burn too.”

See what I’m getting at?

As explained before, Shouto is essentially telling Dabi “I know you want to kill me, but this is going to kill you.” Now if you add Dabi’s two phrases to that, you get his response as “I’m glad that you’re so considerate. That makes me really happy, so it’s alright if I die.”

Many people have pointed out before that Dabi doesn’t care about whether or not he will make it out alive and this is essentially him confirming just that. His only goal is to ruin Endeavor and knowing he is doing that is enough for him to accept death.

He then continues to explain that joy of his with the next sentence:「見ろよあの顔」

「見ろ」-> look (volitional form)

「よ」-> adds extra emphasis after volitional form

「あの」-> that

「顔」-> face

= “LOOK at that face!”

With his goal being all about destroying Endeavor, seeing this man look so defeated right there is the first proof for Dabi that his plan has worked out. While he doesn’t know yet what the actual consequences for Endeavor are going to be after this, he certainly has damaged him.

The next line reads:「最高傑作のお人形が失敗作の火力に負けて死にそうだってのに。。。！」

「最高傑作 ; saikoukessaku 」-> masterpiece

「の ; no 」-> hierarchy particle (the word before is the general noun, the word after the specific noun)

「お人形 ; oningyou 」-> doll

「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle

「失敗作 ; shippaisaku 」-> failed creative work

「の ; no 」-> particle to indicate possession, works like an apostrophe

「火力 ; karyoku 」-> firepower

「に ; ni 」-> indirect object marker

「負けて ; makete 」-> being defeated (te-form because another verb follows)

「死に ; shini 」-> going to die

「そうだって ; soudatte 」-> I’m saying it’s so

「のに ; noni 」-> shows disappointment (“If only that weren’t the case”)

= “I say it’s a shame that the masterpiece doll is about to be defeated and die by the firepower of the failed creative work.”

A lot of people take issue with Dabi yet again referring to Shouto as a “doll” here. Obviously, that isn’t a nice thing to say, but please keep in mind that Dabi doesn’t really know Shouto and with that also doesn’t know how Shouto feels about Endeavor. All Dabi sees is Shouto being a hero-to-be, just like Endeavor has planned. Keep in mind that Dabi used to be in Shouto’s shoes, which makes looking at Shouto be like looking in a mirror and seeing young Touya trying so hard to be what his father expects of him, yet failing over and over again. They were both born for that selfish purpose. They were never born to be people, but only born to be what their father needs them to be. And now that Dabi has broken free from that role, it’s natural for him to describe Shouto’s position as such to emphasize it in case the others haven’t understood that this is the reason for their existence and them being right there in that exact moment.

The final part says「グプっ。。。なァ見ろって！壊れちまってるよ！！ははは！！」

「グプっ ; gupuu 」-> special effects sound (I will explain this one in a second)

「なァ ; naa 」-> when placed at the start of a sentence it’s an attention seeker, kind of like a “hey!”

「見ろ ; miro」-> look (volitional)

「って ; tte 」-> to say (in casual conversation this can be used to repeat what one has just said to stress one’s own quote; can show frustration)

「壊れちまってる ; kowarechimatteru」-> be broken (unintentionally; regretfully)

「よ ; yo 」-> sentence ending particle to show emphasis

「ははは ; hahaha 」-> laughing sound

= “Hey, I said LOOK! He is completely broken, hahaha!”

As mentioned in the translation comparison for the last chapter, the chimatteru indicates that the verb it attaches to has happened unintentionally or has yielded regrettable results. We know that it is Dabi’s intention to hurt Endeavor - so him being broken is neither unintentional nor is it regrettable to Dabi. 

So in this case it’s not so much about how Dabi feels. Instead, it’s probably more fitting to say that it’s about Endeavor. This situation has broken Endeavor (which is regretful), even though it had never occurred to him that the past could come back to haunt him (he has not intended for this to happen).

[edit because someone pointed out that (as mentioned for the 292 comparison) chimatteru can also be used to indicate something has been done completely, so in this case he is saying Endeavor is completely broken]

Now for the part that I neglected before: the special effects sound gupuu. The reason I have been holding off an explanation is simply that it’s not necessarily that important for the sentence, however, when I looked this up this was the result:

Yes, you’re reading that correctly: *slurp*

I had a good laugh about that. The holy trinity of the slurping brothers is complete (albeit Dabi doesn’t have the noodles to go with it)

Anyway, back to the serious stuff!

Next, we get this big panel of Dabi with the three speech bubbles. Notice that there are several ha to indicate that he is laughing.

The speech bubbles all put together read:「焦凍！！俺の炎でおまえが焼けたらお父さんはどんな顔を見せてくれるかなァ！？」

「焦凍 ; shouto 」-> Shouto

「俺 ; ore 」-> I

「の ; no 」-> particle to indicate possession, works like an apostrophe

「炎 ; honoo 」-> flames

「で ; de 」-> by

「おまえ ; omae 」-> you

「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle

「焼け ; yake 」-> to burn

「たら ; tara 」-> when (focuses on the results that can come from this first part)

「お父さん ; otousan 」-> dad

「は ; wa 」-> object marker particle

「どんな ; donna 」-> what kind of

「顔 ; kao 」-> face

「を ; wo 」-> direct object marker particle

「見せて ; misete」-> to show (te-form to connect to the next part)

「くれる ; kureru」-> something was done for the speaker (being shown)

「かなァ ; kanaa 」-> I wonder

= “I wonder what kind of face dad will show me, when you get burned by my flames, Shouto!?”

The official translation added the “burn you to ash” part, which just adds more harshness to this than there already is. I’m not exactly opposed to that as I do recognize that he is being harsh here, however, this overall theme of adding words to make the villains sound harsher is just not what a translator is supposed to do so it is important to point it out.

Also notice the kureru, which is used when something was given to or done for the listener (i.e. a favor). Previously, Shouto has pointed out that Dabi would not survive his attempt at burning Shouto, either, and yet here he is wondering specifically what face Endeavor will show him. He isn’t just wondering what face this man will make, but what his reaction would be that his own failure has killed his masterpiece.

After Deku interferes we get this panel of Dabi and this is where the conversation between him and Shouto ends and his speech to Deku starts.

The Japanese version essentially says the same as the translation:「他所の家に首突っ込むなよ！」

「他所」-> another place; outside (one’s family or group)

「の」-> particle to indicate possession, works like an apostrophe

「家」-> family

「に」-> in

「首突っ込む」-> expression to poke one’s nose into another’s affair; lit.: “to thrust one’s neck into something”

「な」-> sentence ending particle; expresses emotion/sentiment

「よ」-> sentence ending particle; shows emphasis

= “Don’t stick your neck (nose) into other people’s family!”

After this, we get the part where Deku gives his speech with the “And guess what?! You’re not Endeavor!” part that was supposed to… reach what exactly? 

Someone pointed out that this wasn’t supposed to be an “It’s your power!” 2.0 speech, because with Shouto, Deku wanted to get to him and help him. With Dabi, on the other hand, he is saying (and he literally is saying this) that Endeavor is trying to be better. And Dabi not being Endeavor means that Dabi is not trying to be better. That, in turn, means that Deku is watching this Endeavor, the one that is trying to be better, but someone like Dabi who isn’t trying isn’t something worth watching.

Anyway, regardless of what the point of that phrase was, Dabi’s reaction is mocking this obvious statement

The Japanese line says「はははそんな事が誰でもわかる！！」

「ははは ; hahaha 」-> laughing

「そんな ; sonna 」-> such

「事 ; koto 」-> thing

「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle

「誰でも ; daredemo 」-> anyone

「わかる ; wakaru」-> to understand

= “Hahaha, anyone understands such a thing!”

Continued by this part.

The first line here says「でも俺はかわいそうな人間だろ！？」

「でも ; demo 」-> but

「俺 ; ore 」-> I

「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle

「かわいそうな ; kawaisou na 」-> pitiable; poor

「人間 ; ningen 」-> human

「だろ ; daro 」-> don’t you think?

= “But I am a pitiable human, don’t you think!?”

What’s interesting to note about this line is the use of ningen. Normally, you would more likely use the word「人」(hito), meaning person, when you put another word in front of it. After all, when you talk about another person (much like I am using the word right now) it’s obvious they are human, so you wouldn’t need to use the word human.

With that, Dabi specifically using the word human here is done in order to humanize himself to Deku. Not only is he asking “hey, don’t you pity me at least a little?” but rather he is saying: “I get that you think I’m just some low-life villain, but I am a human being with valid feelings, so don’t just ignore them because you don’t see me trying.”

Again - Dabi chooses his words carefully and this is no exception.

If you paid extra close attention, you might have noticed that the word kawaisou gets used again. But did you spot the difference? While in the first example the word is written in kanji as 「可哀想」now it’s completely written in hiragana. Why is that? You might wonder, and I did too. Keep in mind that the first time the word gets used here (written in kanji), Dabi is referring to Shouto. This time (written in hiragana) he is referring to himself. Kanji are generally used because it makes texts easier to read since there are no spaces in Japanese. Much like the rest of us, Japanese people are also born with zero kanji knowledge and learn about them as they grow up. Because of this, books for children tend to just be in hiragana (the letter Kota writes to Deku thanking him for having saved him is also written in just hiragana) so they can easily read them. With that, a text in all hiragana gives off a more childish, cute, innocent kinda feel.

Obviously, in spoken Japanese, you can’t hear that he is saying this word in hiragana. But we know that he is. So aside from him using the word human to make him more, well, human, he is also saying the word pitiable in an innocent way, which furthers the image he is trying to create of himself; that of an innocent human being that has been wronged. Because clearly, someone has to help the heroes see that villains are also people. As mentioned before, this is a common theme of the League of Villains and has most recently been brought up by Toga’s question to Uraraka of whether or not the heroes saw Twice as a person. Dabi is, in a way, asking that same question, just with several exclamation marks.

The second line says「正義の味方が犯した罪それが俺だ！」

「正義 ; seigi」-> justice

「の ; no 」-> particle to indicate possession, works like an apostrophe

「味方 ; mikata 」-> supporter

「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle

「犯した ; okashita 」-> committed

「罪 ; tsumi 」-> crime

「それ ; sore 」-> that

「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle

「俺 ; ore 」-> I

「だ ; da 」-> casual form of です (desu); be; is

= “The crimes committed by the champion of justice: that’s me.”

That first part seigi no mikata is sort of a set expression, but I wanted to break it down so you can see what the actual words are. It’s generally translated as champion of justice, knight in shining armor, crime avenger, or hero. Hero is obviously not the right translation here, since they just use the word hero for the profession. Champion of justice is just the closest to the actual words, hence I chose that translation.

The official translation is once again being biased with this sentence, this time though not so much to make the villains look worse, but to make a hero look less bad. While the Japanese version says that this “champion of justice” aka Endeavor has committed crimes that resulted in Dabi’s existence, the translation changed it to “did some vile stuff” which is seriously downplaying the fact that a Pro Hero, whose job it is to fight criminals, is actually a criminal himself! It’s just yet again a very odd change to make, especially given the fact that we know that Endeavor has committed crimes. So why make it sound like less here?

Okay, so you might be confused about this line if you read both the fan translation, as well as the official translation.

Again, the official translation says “evil is thriving” - the fan translation, on the other hand, says “evil will no longer prosper.”

To opposite meanings for the same short phrase. Why is that?

You see, the first line says「悪が栄えるんじゃねェ！」

「悪 ; aku 」-> evil

「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle

「栄える ; sakaeru 」-> to prosper

「んじゃねェ ; n janee 」-> “isn’t it” (see explanation below)

= “Evil will prosper, won’t it?”

The reason for that confusion is that last part, n janee, because its meaning depends on the context, and with that, in cases like this, it’s less obvious which it is.

This is a rougher way of the casual n janai, which is a more casual way of no janai, which is a more casual form of no de wa arimasen. Or in simple terms: it’s very casual.

So what does it mean? Like I said, the meaning depends on the context.

The no is an explanatory particle and when paired with janai can be used for when you express an opinion, whilst seeking the listener’s opinion.

So you can treat it as a “isn’t it” in an affirmative sentence (when you express your opinion or talking about probability), but you can also use it to negate a sentence (hence the two opposite translations). The former can also be used when you’re making a point.

Knowing that it’s pretty much down to context, we have to ask what makes more sense. Is Dabi saying that evil will prosper, or is he saying evil doesn’t prosper?

To put this into context, you have to look at the surrounding sentences. Prior to this one, Dabi mentioned that he is the crimes of the hero system. In the next phrase, he talks about justice collapsing. Because of that, I think “evil will prosper” is a more accurate translation as justice collapses as a result of evil - unless you interpret evil as being about the heroes.

Anyway, the second line says「正義が側板するだけ！」

「正義 ; seigi 」-> justice

「が ; ga 」-> subject marker particle

「側板 ; gakai 」-> collapse; downfall

「する ; suru 」-> to do (turns the noun it attaches to into a verb)

「だけ ; dake 」-> only

= “Justice will only collapse!”

If you look back at the official translation, it says “Justice is losing this war!” Meanwhile, the Japanese version doesn’t mention the words losing or war. While they still somewhat say the same thing, losing a war doesn’t inherently lead to irreversible, long-term effects. Instead, this situation is about more than just losing this war. The entire system is taking a fatal blow from this. Not even so much from this war, though. The reason Dabi is so certain that this will be the downfall for justice is that how are people supposed to still trust in this justice system when those that are supposed to defend it are criminals themselves? It’s more of a natural consequence resulting from a system that has been corrupt for far too long - the exposure is simply what will put an end to it.

The third line in that part is「俺はその責任を感情豊かな皆々様に示しただけだ」

「俺 ; ore 」-> I

「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle

「その ; sono 」-> that

「責任 ; sekinin」-> duty; responsibility

「を ; wo 」-> direct object marker

「感情 ; kanjou」-> emotion

「豊かな ; yutaka na」-> extremely; very

「皆々様 ; minaminasama」-> everyone

「に ; ni 」-> to

「示した ; shimeshita」-> pointed out; showed

「だけだ ; dake」-> only

「だ; da 」-> casual form of です (desu); be; is

= “I only pointed this responsibility out to all you very emotional people.”

What irked me about this phrase in particular in the official translation was yet again the choice of words. I get that Dabi has a rough way of speaking. But sometimes, he chooses to use polite words and that shouldn’t be erased.

So when the official translation makes him say “All I’m doing is showing you sentimental dopes who’s to blame for that!” It’s just a rude phrase. But in Japanese he says minaminasama. You might be familiar with the word minna or minna-san, with the san in the latter example being a polite suffix (kind of like Mr./Mrs.,...). Sama is similar to that but even more polite. So minaminasama is about as polite as you can go. There might not be a direct English equivalent to that level of politeness, but I think we can all understand that “dopes” is not a correct translation here.

The responsibility/blame part goes back to what Deku said to him. “You aren’t Endeavor” - no, he isn't. And no, he isn’t exactly trying to be better. But that kind of mentality only ignores the obvious fact that this all could’ve been prevented, had it not been for Endeavor and his own selfish goals. It was a hero - the “champion of justice” - that committed crimes just like a villain. But it’s unheard of for a hero to do such a thing. Society doesn’t get shaken at its core when it hears about a villain committing a crime. A hero, on the other hand, being found guilty of a criminal record, will lead to people doubting the integrity of heroes altogether and that is not Dabi’s doing. All he does is share the truth.

To round this speech off, we get one last phrase:

“The future coming down the pipeline… is one where all that schmaltz and lip service is gonna get blown away by the chaos!”

The Japanese line says「これから訪れる未来はきってキレイ事など吹けば飛んでく混沌だろうぜ！」

「これから ; korekara 」-> from now on; after this

「訪れる ; otozureru 」-> to arrive

「未来 ; mirai 」-> future

「は ; wa 」-> topic marker particle

「きっと ; kitto 」-> surely; without a doubt

「キレイ 事; kireigoto」-> glossing over; lip service

「など ; nado 」-> such as

「吹けば ; fukeba 」-> to blow (conditional form of fuku)

「飛んでく ; tondeku」-> to go flying (short for tonde iku)

「混沌 ; konton」-> chaos

「だろう ; darou」-> it seems; don’t you think?

「ぜ ; ze 」-> ending particle for emphasis (more casual/ruder version of yo)

= “Surely, if things like this lip service get blown over, the future coming after this will be chaos flying around.”

In Japanese, there are several conditional forms. The ba form, as used here in fukeba, is used when the preceding clause expresses a condition, which results in natural consequences. In this case, something happens in case pretty things get blown over.

Mirai is one of the words you can use to talk about the future in Japanese. This word is more intangible and more general rather than being about one specific event or person, so everyone will be affected by this.

And with that, we have made it through all of his speech from this chapter, congrats!

Something you may have noticed is that there are plenty of particles you can use at the end of a sentence, usually for emphasis. One of the most common ones you find throughout the chapter are yo and ze. Yo is a pretty standard one to show emphasis, whereas ze is more of a colloquial version of yo that has an assertive feel and is therefore usually only used when speaking in very casual conversations or to someone of lower social status than you. Dabi has used this on Endeavor before and is now also using it on Deku - aka his opponents.

Going back to the start of the chapter when Dabi is mainly focused on Shouto, though, he ends most of his sentences with naa. As mentioned before, this particle is used to express emotions/sentiment.

He also uses that during their first on-screen interaction during the summer camp. While I do think that Dabi is mainly still only seeing Shouto as an extension of Endeavor, I do think that there is also a part of him that does see himself in him and that can somewhat sympathize with him. He isn’t being as rough on him overall (verbally that is), and instead is trying to come off as more emotional, possibly just to appeal more to him.

To sum it up, there are a lot of things that just get lost in translation due to nuances that don’t exist in English. More often than not, though, the villains are being given harsher words, whereas anything related to heroes is softened. Dabi is constantly shown to be someone who puts great care and thought into the words he uses, so there is a lot of that emotional intelligence that gets neglected in the translation and then makes him seem more like someone on a random mission rather than someone who has put genuine thought into this.

There are still so many people in the fandom who, for some reason, think Dabi is in the wrong and irredeemable for having killed thirty people, whilst having the same stance as Deku in thinking that Endeavor is much better because at least he is trying.

While they should both be held accountable for their actions, Dabi has a good point when he said that heroes are to blame for his existence and that their crimes are what will ruin the justice system and not him.

Best Jeanist’s reaction to this whole situation was complaining that Dabi uses his personal past to shed a bad light on the heroes, which summarizes that exact problem of the hero society: That heroes are more concerned with their own image than actually being heroes who go above and beyond to bring about peace and safety.

Seeing Shouto’s reaction, being concerned about his big brother rather than himself, is at the very least giving some hope that at least one person on the hero side is able to see beyond the villain exterior and see them as a human-being - without needing a long speech for it.

We’ll have to wait and see how this is going to continue, but in more likeliness, the official English translation will continue to include its bias.

If you’ve made it this far - thank you so much for reading! This post was filled with a lot of information and trust me when I say some of these lines almost broke me as I tried to understand them. I hope I could clarify some parts of the chapter, though, specifically Dabi’s character, since the official translation loves to change his character.