#the other weird ship of mine I will walk backwards into hell for:

[abbygrabska]

The Christmas Invasion

somehow didn't post this to Tumblr? anyways here

“London… The Powell Estate… 24th of December…  2005… On the way to Earth! Now then… what do I look like? No, no no, no no no no nono no. No. Don’t tell me. Let’s see… two legs, two arms, two hands… Slight weakness in the dorsal tubercle. Hair! I’m not bald! Oh, oh! Big hair! Sideburns, I’ve got sideburns! Or really bad skin. Little bit thinner… That’s weird. Give me time, I’ll get used to it. I… have got… a mole. I can feel it. Between my shoulder blades, there’s a mole. That’s all right. Love the mole. Go on then, tell me. What do you think?” He asks.

“Is this how your regenerations go every time?” I ask, “Explosive?”

“No, that’s just when something happens beforehand.” He says.

“Okay.” I nod, walking towards him.

He watches me stand in front of him.

“They’re definitely sideburns.” I tell him, placing my hands on either side of his face.

“What do you think?” He whispers.

“I think it’ll take some time for me to get used to not looking at your last face, but this one is definitely a nice one. What do you think?” I run my thumb over his cheek tenderly.

He leans into my touch, “I think, I like having you this close.”

I let out a giggle, “You’re definitely more open about your feelings in this body than the last one.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He pouts.

“It means, I never knew you cared until you sent me away.” I whisper.

“Of course, I care about you, I-” He pauses, “Ooh, the change seems to be going a bit wrong…” He stumbles out of my grip.

“What does that mean?” I ask.

He goes to the console and does something, “I haven’t used this one in years.”

The Tardis lurches, “What’re you doing?!” I shout.

“Putting on a bit of speed! That’s it! My beautiful ship! Come on, faster! That’s a girl! Faster! Wanna break the time limit?!”

“Stop it!”

“Ah, don’t be so dull… let’s have a bit of fun! Let’s rip through that vortex!” He looks at me, “The regeneration’s going wrong. I can’t stop myself. Ah, my head…” He turns back to the console, “Faster! Let’s open those engines!”

The Tardis groans, “What’s that?”

“We’re gonna crash land!”

“Well then, do something!”

“Too late! Out of control! Oh, I love it!” He cheers.

I scream as sparks shoot out of the console, “Doctor! I’m scared!”

He seems to snap out of it, staring at me. He stumbles over and pulls me into a hug.

I cling to him, whimpering, he strokes my hair before pulling away, still holding me.

He stares deep into my tear-filled eyes and leans down, pressing his lips to mine.

My eyes flutter shut, my hands leaving his jumper and going to his hair. His hands place themselves on my waist and curl into the fabric of my jacket. I whimper against his mouth, pulling on his hair. His tongue finds its way into my mouth, tangling with mine. 

I don’t notice the shaking anymore.

His lips leave mine and I attempt to link them again but he starts to trail them down my neck. I moan quietly, and he nips the skin at the pulse of my throat. Heat forms in the pit of my stomach, my hands move to grip his shoulders as he moves his hands to my front and undoes the belt of my jacket.

My jacket leaves my body, and he kneels slightly to pick me up by my thighs. 

Gasping out, his lips find mine again. 

His lips soon travel down to the tops of my breasts, sucking a hickey into the left one and leaving a bite mark on the right.

I don’t hear the doors open, but I do hear the shouts, “What the hell?!”

The Doctor and I pull away from each other quickly. He sets me down and stumbles towards Mickey and Jackie. Rose runs past him and hugs me tightly.

“Jackie! Mickey! Blimey! No, no, no, no, hold on.” He stumbles backward a few steps, “Wait there, I’ve got something to say. There was something I had to tell you. Something important, what was it? No, hold on, hold on…” He comes back to them and puts his hands on their shoulders, “Hold on, shush, shush, shush, shush… Oh!”

The two jump in alarm.

“I know!” He looks from one to the other, panting and beaming, “Merry Christmas!” And then he collapses, falling to the ground unconscious.

“Who even is that?” Rose asks.

“The Doctor, he regenerated.” I run over to him and check for a pulse, “I don’t know how to explain it.” I find one so I stand up and smile at them.

“Hello.”

The Doctor is tucked up in my bed, wearing a pair of stripy pajamas. I am sitting on the edge of the bed, holding his hand. Rose stands at the end of the bed.

Jackie enters, holding a stethoscope, she hands it to me, “Here we go. Tina the Cleaner’s got this lodger, medical student. And she was fast asleep, so I just took it.”

I put the stethoscope in my ears. I ignore what Rose says to Jackie. I place it on one side of his chest. Hearing a steady heartbeat I switch it to the other side and hear the same, “Both working.”

“What d’you mean ‘both’?” She asks.

“Well, he’s got two hearts.”

“Oh, don’t be stupid.”

Rose walks to the door, “He has!”

Jackie eyes him, “Anything else he’s got two of?”

I turn to her, “Leave him alone.”

The blondes leave the room.

I brush the hair out of his face and press a kiss to his forehead. His mouth opens and golden wisps escape, flying into the air. I lift my hand and some of it flies in between my fingers, circle my wrist and into my skin. The rest of the golden energy flies out the window.

Warmth envelops both sides of my chest.

I leave the room and go into the living room, “Is that Harriet Jones?”

Jackie answers me, “She’s Prime Minister now. I’m eighteen quid a week better off.”

I smile.

“They’re calling it ‘Britain’s Golden Age’. Keep on saying, ‘my girls have met her.’”

“Did more than that. Stopped World War Three with her. Harriet Jones.”

They’re asking her questions about the Guinevere One Space Probe.

“You two were all over one another in there.” Rose teases me as we walk down the street.

“Shut up!” I whine, face heating up.

“If we hadn’t of shown up when we did, how far would you have gone?” Mickey wiggles his eyebrows at me.

“I don’t know…” I mumble.

I look behind me, distracted as Rose and Mickey talk about Jackie.

There is a brass band of masked Santas, who are playing ‘Good Tidings of Comfort and Joy’. I stare at them for a long time, sensing something is wrong. Suddenly, their trumpets are revealed to be flame throwers, blue flames shoot out of them, and people run around screaming. We duck behind a stall.

“It’s us! They’re after us!”

 The Santas blast the stall we’re hiding behind, I scream. We run, the Santas pursuing us. One of the blasts catches the enormous Christmas tree instead, and it falls to the ground on top of one of the Santas. We run down the street.

“What’s going on? What’ve we done? Why are they after us?”

 A taxi pulls up and we clamber in.

“They’re after the Doctor.” I say.

“I can’t even go shopping with you. We get attacked by a brass band.”

The taxi drives off, Rose calls someone. 

“Who you calling?” I ask.

“Mum.”

The taxi pulls up and we jump out, running towards the flats.

We burst inside, Jackie’s still on the phone.

“Get off the phone!” Rose shouts.

I run into my room and check on the Doctor. He’s still asleep.

Soon Rose and Jackie run into my room followed shortly by Mickey.

Mickey and Jackie slide my wardrobe in front of the door while Rose bends over the Doctor and shouts at him.

I grab the sonic screwdriver out of the Doctor’s leather jacket. I place it in his hand and whisper, “Help me.”

The Doctor sits up very suddenly and points his sonic screwdriver at the murderous Christmas tree. It explodes.

The Doctor lowers the sonic screwdriver, “Remote control. But who’s controlling it?” He gets out of bed.

We all go out on the balcony. Outside on the ground stand three of the Santas.

“That’s them. What are they?” Mickey asks.

Rose shushes him.

I stare at the Doctor, who raises his sonic screwdriver and points it at the Santas threateningly. They back away, standing closer to each other. Then, they teleport away.

“They’ve just gone! What kind of rubbish were they? I mean, no offense, but they’re not much cop if a sonic screwdriver’s gonna scare them off.”

“Pilot Fish.” The Doctor says.

“What?” I ask.

We all look at him.

“They were just Pilot Fish.” He coughs and throws himself backward against the wall.

I kneel in front of him, “I’m sorry. I woke you up too soon.” I apologize.

He breathes heavily, “I’m still regenerating. I’m bursting with energy.” More gold energy escapes through his mouth and goes into my skin, “You see? The Pilot Fish could smell it a million miles away. So they eliminate the defense, that’s you lot, and they carry me off. They could run their batteries on me for a couple of years.” He lurches forward groaning.

I kneel in front of him, holding him up, tears in my eyes, “I’m sorry.”

He smiles at me through his pain, “Don’t be, you did the right thing.” 

“We haven't got much time. If there’s Pilot Fish, then…” He takes an apple out of his dressing gown pocket, “Why’s there an apple in my dressing gown?”

“Oh, that’s Howard, sorry.”

“He keeps apples in his dressing gown?” “He gets hungry.”

The Doctor looks at the apple, “What, he gets hungry in his sleep?” “Sometimes.”

He suddenly shouts with pain again and sinks to the floor. 

He grimaces, “Brain… collapsing…”

He grabs hold of my arms, holding them tightly, “The Pilot Fish. The Pilot Fish mean… that something, something…” He takes a deep breath, “Something’s coming.” He collapses into my lap.

I kneel next to the Doctor on my bed, tucking him in and mopping his forehead with a cloth. He is restless and sweaty. Tears fill my eyes and I choke back a sob. I sit at the side of the bed with my head in between my knees.

I enter the living room and sit on the arm of a chair, drying my eyes.

“Any change?” Jackie asks.

I take a shaky breath in, “Just one heart beating.”

I ignore the conversation Rose and Mickey are having in favor of staring at the tv.

There is a distorted image on the tv screen.

“Funny sort of rocks.” Jackie says.

“Those aren’t rocks.”

The image becomes clearer. It’s an alien, roaring viciously.

“Abby.” Mickey says, “Take a look, I’ve got access to the military. They’re tracking a spaceship. It’s big, it’s fast, and it’s coming this way.” 

I peer over at the computer from the edge of the chair.

“Coming for what, though? The Doctor?” Rose asks.

An image of four of the aliens comes onto the screen.

“You seen them before?” He asks.

Rose and I both shake our heads.

“People, you belong to us. To the Sycorax. We own you. We now possess your land, your minerals, your precious stones. You will surrender or they will die. Sycorax strong, Sycorax mighty, Sycorax rock.”

“I don’t understand what they’re saying.” Rose says.

“I can.” I tell them, confused as to why I understand but they don’t. I then repeat what the Sycorax said to them.

I look up from where I lay next to the Doctor and to Rose.

“The Doctor wouldn’t do this. The old Doctor. The proper Doctor. He’d wake up. He’d save us.”

I glare at Rose, “It’s not his fault, don’t try to blame him for it.”

Her eyes widen in surprise, she’s never heard me speak like that, not to her at least.

Jackie smiles softly, “You really do love him, don’t you?”

I nod, “How could I not?”

There’s yelling from outside.

I go out and see Sandra yelling at her husband.

“Sandra?” I ask.

“He won’t listen. He’s just walking. He won’t stop walking! There’s this sort of light thing.” She follows after him, “Stop it! Right now! Jason, please!”

Rose and Mickey come to the door. There's hundreds of people, from all over the estate walking. They all move in the same direction, none of them respond to the frightened and confused calls of their families, they just keep walking.

“It’s the aliens doing it.” My eyes move up to the sky, “They’re all heading to the roof.”

We all run up the stairwell, going to the roof.

All of the mind-controlled people stop at the very edge, and from where I stand I can see thousands of people standing at the edge of any high surface they can find, awaiting orders.

“What do we do?” Mickey asks.

“Nothing. There’s no one to save us, not anymore.” Rose mutters.

“We’ll think of something.” I tell him.

Rose shoots me a sharp look, “Abby, we can’t do anything! In case you haven’t noticed, the Doctor’s gone!”

I stare at her, “My life isn’t defined by the Doctor. I don’t need to listen to his every idea or follow his every order. I’m my own person and I’ll find a way, on my own if I have to.” I turn and go back to the flat.

“Ladies and gentlemen, if I may take a moment during this terrible time. It’s hardly the Queen’s speech, I’m afraid that’s been canceled. This crisis is unique, and I’m afraid to say it might get much worse. I would ask you all to remain calm. But I have one request.” Harriet takes a breath, “Doctor? If you’re out there, we need you. I don’t know what to do. If you can hear me Doctor, if anyone knows the Doctor, if anyone can find him, the situation has never been more desperate. Help us. Please, Doctor, help us.”

Rose cries out loudly, clutching her mother.

I jump up, staring at her, “The Doctor isn’t gone, and he isn’t leaving us, he’s regenerating. He can’t help us right now, but we’ll figure something out.”

The windows smash, showering the floor with glass. The ground shakes violently.

We run outside and watch the spaceship float into view, obscuring the sun.

Rose stares at it for a few seconds before running back inside.

“Mickey, we’re gonna carry him.” She throws the duvet off of him, “Mum, get your stuff, and some food. We’re going.”

“Well, where to?” Mickey asks.

“The Tardis.” I respond, “It’s the only safe place on Earth.”

“What’re we gonna do in there?!” Jackie asks.

“Hide.” Rose answers.

“Is that it?” I ask.

“Abby, look in the sky. There’s a great big alien invasion and the Doctor’s kaput. Now, all we can do is run and hide. Now, move.”

Jackie exits the room. I watch Rose and Mickey take the Doctor out the front door.

I help Jackie take several shopping bags into the Tardis.

“No chance you could fly this thing?” Mickey asks.

“Not anymore, no.” I shake my head.

“But, you did it before…” Rose looks confused.

“I know, but it’s been wiped out of my head like it’s forbidden.” I watch them set the Doctor down on the floor, “Try that again and the universe might rip in half.”

“Ah, better not then.” Rose says.

“So, what do we do? Just sit here?” Mickey asks.

Rose glares at him, “That’s as good as it gets.”

Jackie walks up to us with a thermal flask, “Right, here we go. Nice cup of tea.”

“Hmm, the solution to everything…” Rose says sarcastically.

“Now, stop your moaning. I’ll get the rest of the food.” Jackie then exits the Tardis.

I lay down next to the Doctor on the floor, holding his hand.

“How does this thing work?” Mickey looks at the Tardis computer, “It picks up TV, maybe we could see what’s going on out there. Maybe we’ve surrendered.” He presses a few buttons, “What do you do to it?”

“I don't know, it sort of tunes itself.” I mumble, looking at the ceiling.

I turn on my side and curl into the Doctor, ignoring the conversation happening until I hear Rose scream.

I jump to my feet and run out of the Tardis with Mickey, making sure to close the door behind me.

The Sycorax yells with glee.

Harriet Jones stumbles towards us, “Abby, Rose.” She embraces us, “The Doctor… is he with you?”

I shake my head, “No.”

The Sycorax all let out screeches and hisses of what sound like confusion as they all begin to point at the Tardis, a golden wisp of energy comes out and circles around me before absorbing into my skin.

One of the Sycorax grumbles something and suddenly I am being restrained. Harsh hands grip my arms cruelly as I am dragged forward. I get shoved forward and into the grasp of the leader.

“The yellow girl,” He speaks loudly, pulling me with him as he walks forward and points at Rose, “She has the clever blue box. But she does not speak for the planet. The brown one, the golden light shows she is in charge, she will speak for the planet.” 

The humans in the room stare at him in shock. I shut my eyes tightly.

I take a deep breath, and open my eyes, “Are you familiar with the Shadow Proclamation?”

The Sycorax looks confused, but nods.

I smirk, “Well, in that case, I seek audience with the Sycorax under a peaceful contract. According to convention 15 of the Shadow Proclamation. Meaning you may not kill any humans on Earth, or this ship until the Parley is over.”

Shouts of anger echo around me.

“You think you are clever with your stolen words?” The leader snarls, “We are the Sycorax. We stride through the darkness. Next to us, you are but a wailing child. If you are the best your planet can offer as a champion… Then your world will be gutted… and you’re people enslaved.”

The humans all start saying something about the Sycorax speaking English. 

“If he’s speaking Sycoraxic but you can hear English, that means the Tardis is translating.” I say.

Rose laughs, “Oh, he’s going to be very angry that you touched her.” Suddenly, the doors of the Tardis open and reveal the Doctor.

In an instant, his eyes are on me, “She’s right, I am very angry.” Then a smirk appears on his face, “Did you miss me?” I smile brightly, “Always.”

The Sycorax flings his whip forward. With a glare, the Doctor yanks the whip out of the Sycorax’s hands as soon as it wrapped around his arm and mutters, “You could take someone’s eye out with that!”

“How dare…” The Sycorax snarls as the Doctor strides over to him.

The Doctor grabs the long, crimson staff from the alien’s hands and snaps it over his knee, glaring.

‘Fuck that’s hot.’ I think.

He then grabs me by the waist and pulls me to him, arm secure and protective around me.

I smile up at him, “Hello, honey.”

He smiles back, “Hello, beautiful.” then his sharp brown eyes look back at the Sycorax leader and snaps, “You just can’t get the staff! Now you, just wait! We’re busy.”

Without bothering to look back, he leads me over to our friends.

Rose flings her arms around me.

“Mickey, hello! And Harriet Jones, MP for Flydale North. Blimey, it’s like ‘This Is Your Life.’” The Doctor laughs, “Tea! That’s all I needed! A good cup of tea! Superheated infusion of free radicals and tannin. Just the thing for healing the synapses…” He lowers his voice, looking into my eyes, “Now… be honest. How do I look?”

“Different.” I say.

“Good different or bad different?” He asks.

“Good different.” I grin.

He looks dead serious, “Am I… ginger?”

I look at his hair, “No, it’s just brown.”

The Doctor turns away, “Aww, I wanted to be ginger. I’ve never been ginger.” He then turns back around and points at Rose, “Fat lot of good you were, you gave up on me, oh, that’s rude. That’s the sort of man I am now, am I? Rude. Rude and not ginger.”

Harriet looks at him confused, “I’m sorry, who is this?”

“I’m the Doctor.”

“He’s the Doctor.”

“But what happened to my Doctor? Or is it just a title that’s passed on?” She asks.

He walks towards her, “I’m him. I’m literally him. Same man, new face, well, new everything.”

“But you can’t be.” Her brow furrows.

“Harriet Jones. We were trapped in Downing Street, and the one thing that scared you wasn’t the aliens… wasn’t the war… it was the thought of your mother being on her own.” He says.

“Oh, my god.”

“Did you win the election?” He asks curiously.

She smiles, rather pleased, “Landslide majority.”

“If I might interrupt!” We all spin around, having forgotten about him.

“Yes! Sorry! Hello, big fella!” The Doctor smiles.

“Who exactly are you?” The Sycorax leader asks.

“Well. That’s the question.” 

“I demand to know who you are!” The Sycorax leader shouts.

The Doctor imitates him, “I DON’T KNOW!” He relaxes, “See there’s the thing. I’m the Doctor, but beyond that, I… I just don’t know. I literally do not know who I am. It’s all untested.” He walks around, “Am I funny? Am I sarcastic?” He looks at me with a wink, “Sexy?” 

I smile shyly.

He continues, “Right old misery? Life and soul? Right-handed? Left-handed? A gambler? A fighter? A coward? A traitor? A liar? A nervous wreck?”

“You’ve certainly got a mouth on you.” I say. “Yeah, but you love it.” He winks before noticing the button, “And how am I gonna react when I see this?” He points at the button with an insane smile, “A great big threatening button.” He pulls me up the stairs, laughing, “A great big threatening button which must not be pressed under any circumstances.”

“Looks like some sort of control matrix. I bet it’s a blood type, judging from how all those people went to the roof.” I say.

The Doctor nods, bending down and pulling open a small door in order to access the controls underneath the button, dipping his finger in the blood and tasting it, “A Positive. Clever girl.” 

I grin at him.

“But that means… blood control.” He seems delighted at this, “Blood control! Oh! I haven’t seen blood control for years! You’re controlling all the A Positives!”

The Sycorax’s grimace falters slightly. The Doctor continues, “Which leaves us with a great big problem. ‘Cos… I really don’t know who I am. I don’t know when to stop. So if I see a great big threatening button which should never ever be pressed… then I just wanna do this.” He whacks the button.

The humans in the room protest, but I trust the Doctor.

I turn to the Sycorax leader, “What do you think, big guy? Are they dead?”

“We allow them to live.” He says.

“Allow?” The Doctor scoffs, “You’ve got no choice! I mean, that’s all blood control is. Cheap bit of voodoo. Scares the pants off you, but that’s as far as it goes. It’s like hypnosis… you can hypnotize someone to walk like a chicken or sing like Elvis, you can’t hypnotize them to death. Survival instinct���s too strong.”

“Blood control was just one form of conquest. I can summon the armada and take this world by force.”

“Well, yeah, you could, yeah, you could do that, of course you could. But why? Look at these people.” He gestures to the humans, “These human beings. Consider their potential. From the day they arrive on the planet and blinking step into the sun. there is more to see than can ever be seen. More to do than… no, hold on…” He pauses, “Sorry, that’s ‘The Lion King’. But the point still stands. Leave them alone!”

“Or what?”

“Or…” He grabs a sword from one of the Sycorax guarding the humans, pulls me down the steps, pushes me over to Rose, stands in the empty floor space in front of the Tardis, and raises it into the air, “I challenge you.” The Sycorax burst out laughing.

“Oh, that struck a chord. Am I right that the sanctified rules of combat still apply?”

The Sycorax leader walks down the steps and unsheathes his sword, “You stand as this world’s champion.”

The Doctor shrugs his dressing gown off, “Thank you. I’ve no idea who I am, but you just summed me up.” He tosses it to me, “So… you accept my challenge? Or you just a cranak pel casacree salvak?”

The Sycorax Leader hisses. They both kneel by their swords.

“For the planet?”

“For the planet.”

They stand up and face each other, holding their swords at the ready. They then run at each other and begin to fight. After a few seconds, the Doctor is thrown aside, and the Sycorax Leader laughs. The Doctor straightens himself up and they begin to fight again. The Sycorax leader swings his sword at the Doctor. 

The Doctor leads the fight up the stairs, “Bit of fresh air?” He hits a button and a door opens, leading to a platform on the outside of the spaceship.

They continue their fight. All the humans and a few Sycorax follow them. The swash-buckling continues. The Sycorax Leader manages to catch the Doctor slightly on his nose, and he groans. 

I move to run forward, but the Doctor raises a hand to stop me, “Stay back! Invalidate the challenge and he wins the planet.”

He wipes his nose, and he and the Sycorax Leader run toward each other, clashing swords. They both grimace with effort, and the Doctor is knocked backwards to the ground. Taking advantage, the Sycorax Leader slashes at the Doctor’s wrist, succeeding in chopping his hand off, up to the elbow. It falls off the side of the spaceship, sword and all. 

The Doctor watches it drop, and looks back at the Sycorax Leader, rather stunned and annoyed, “You cut my hand off.”

The Sycorax Leader speaks triumphantly, “Yah! Sycorax!”

The Doctor gets to his feet, “And now I know what sort of man I am. I’m lucky. ‘Cos quite by chance… I’m still within the first fifteen hours of my regeneration cycle. Which means i’ve got just enough residual cellular energy… to do this.”

He holds up his stump of an arm, and before everyones eyes, it grows right back.

“Witchcraft.” The Leader accuses.

“Time Lord.”

I take one of the Sycorax’s swords out of its sheath, “Doctor!”

He turns and I toss it to him.

He catches it by the handle and spins it around, turning back to the Sycorax leader, “Wanna know the best bit? This new hand…” He uses a texan accent, “It’s a fightin’ hand!”

The Doctor runs at the Sycorax Leader, and the fight commences once more. They clash swords for a few more moments, then the Doctor jabs him hard in the stomach with the handle of the sword.

The onlookers wince, and the Sycorax Leader groans. The Doctor does the same twice more, causing the Sycorax Leader to fall to the ground. 

The Doctor points his sword at his throat, “I win.”

The Leader speaks with difficulty, “Then kill me.”

“I’ll spare your life if you’ll take this champion’s command: leave this planet, and never return. What do you say?” 

“Yes.”

The Doctor jabs the sword closer and speaks angrily, “Swear on the blood of your species.”

“I swear.”

He speaks much lighter, “There we are, then! Thanks for that! Cheers, big fella!” He stabs the sword into the ground.

Harriet claps, “Bravo!”

I run forward, “That says it all, bravo!”

“Yeah! Not bad for a man in his jim-jams!” He speaks as I help him into the dressing gown.

“Very Arthur Dent. Now, there was a nice man. Hold on, what have I got in here?” He pulls a satsuma out of his pocket.

I laugh.

“A satsuma. Ah, that friend of your mothers, he does like his snacks doesn’t he? But doesn’t that just sum up Christmas?” We begin to walk back to the door. The Doctor throws the satsuma into the air and catches it again, “You go through all those presents and right at the end, tucked away at the bottom, there’s always one stupid old satsuma. Who wants a satsuma?”

There’s a roar from behind us, and the Doctor throws the satsuma at a switch on the side of the ship. I turn around and watch the Sycorax leader fall off the ship.

“No second chances. I’m that sort of man.”

The Doctor stands in front of the Tardis with me and the others. 

He adresses the remaining Sycorax, “By the ancient rites of combat, I forbid you to scavenge here for the rest of time. And when you go back tot he stars and tell others of this planet… when you tell them of its riches, its people, its potential. Whe you talk of the Earth, make shure that you tell them this: It is defended.”

We then get teleported back to Earth.

“Where are we?” I ask.

“We’re just off Bloxom Road. We’re just round the corner, we did it!” Mickey laughs, jumping up and down in glee.

The Doctor holds his hand out as the spaceship engines start up, “Wait a minute… wait a minute…” 

The ship takes flight, back to the skies. The Doctor grins.

Mickey, Rose and I celebrate.

I see Jackie coming down the street and run over to hug her. “Oh my god! You did it! My girls! Oh!”

“You did it too! It was the tea! Fixed his head!” I say.

“That was all I needed, cup of tea.” The Doctor smiles.

“I said so!”

Jackie then notices Harriet, “Oh my god! It’s the bleeding Prime Minister!”

“Come here, you.” The Doctor holds his arms out to Jackie, who throws her arms around him. Rose, Mickey and I join in the group hug.

We all jump as a beam of green light shoots loudly up from the ground nearby. The same green light beams up from another four points, and the five points meet in the middle. The energy shoots up into space and hits the spaceship, destroying it.

“What is that? What’s happening?” I ask.

The Doctor walks off and talks to Harriet before coming back to us. She yells after him, but he ignores her, so we do the same as we walk off.

Mickey, Rose, Jackie and I are preparing Christmas Dinner. Mickey is carving the turkey and Rose serves the sprouts at the table. I look up and see the Doctor standing in front of me in a brown suit and brown jacket.

I let out a scream as the Christmas cracker I pulled with the Doctor bangs. He wins but still gives me the cracker.

“Oh, that’s yours…” He says as I pull out the pink paper party crown out of the cracker.

“Pink! Lovely!” I giggle as I put the hat on.

Rose points to the television, “Look, it’s Harriet Jones!”

We all turn to look at the television.

The phone rings and Jackie goes into the kitchen to answer it, “It’s Beth. She says go and look outside.”

“Why?” I ask.

“I dunno, just go outside and look. Come on, shift!”

We all get up and go outside.

There are lots of others outside too, as it appears to be snowing. It looks like there are meteors in the sky.

“What are those, meteors?” I ask.

“It’s the spaceship breaking up in the atmosphere. This isn’t snow, it’s ash.” He explains.

I wince, “Eesh.”

“This is a brand new planet Earth. No denying the existence of aliens now, everyone saw it. Everything’s new.” He says.

I turn to the Doctor, “And what about you? What are you gonna do next?”

“Well… back to the Tardis… same old life.” He looks down at me, “You’ll come along though, right?”

I grin, “Of course. As long as you’ll have me.”

Rose steps next to us, “Got room for me still?”

We both look at her, then back at each other, and nod.

“Of course.”

“Well, I recon you’re mad. The three of you. It’s like you go looking for trouble.”

The Doctor rushes up to her, “Trouble’s just the bits in-between.” He puts an arm around her and looks up at the sky, “It’s all waiting out there, Jackie. It’s brand new to me.”

I smile at him.

“All those planets… creaturs and horizons… I haven’t seen them yet! Not with these eyes…” He stands beside me, “And it is gonna be… fantastic.”

I smile at the use of his old catchphrase and he grins back. He holds his hand out to me.

I take his hand and we look up at the sky for a few moments. 

I step closer to him and brush the ash off his arm, “So, where’re we gonna go first?”

“Um… that way.” He points deliberately at a point in the night sky, “No, hold on… that way.” He points a smidgen to the right of his first point.

I point in the same direction, “That way?”

He looks at me, “Hmm?”

I nod, “Yeah. that way.”

We smile at each other for a few seconds then gaze up at the night-sky, hand in hand.

[biblicallyaccuratebeskar]

Metal Home

Read Chapter 8 Here

Also on AO3

Chapter 9/22: ~2K words

Unfiltered

Mando was purposefully vague about or brief “vacation.” Karga was curious, naturally, but luckily respected our privacy.

I healed well. The bacta was a miracle, even if it did feel like fucking molten lava. In a day or so I was up and moving again, almost like nothing happened.

The wound had apparently left behind a scar. It was out of my line of vision and I didn’t mind, really. I’d never minded scars as long as they had a story attached. Mando hated it though and I didn’t know why. Once I felt his gloved finger linger on it a second too long after applying more bacta. Maybe I just imagined that part, but it gave me chills nevertheless.

We’d been staying on the tiny moon Reius because of its low population and general level of boring compared to some of the other places we’d been to. Breaking through the atmosphere when we first arrived, the view took my breath away. Rolling hills of blindingly green foliage cut into pieces by rushing rivers that carved through the surface everywhere you’d look.

I loved being there. The air was crisp and cool and smelled of trees and soil. The vacation was a farce, but I could at least pretend, right?

Mando usually approached everything with neutral confidence, but since I got hurt it was like he was walking on an icy lake, trying not to fall through. I always felt his eyes on me wherever I went, never letting me stray too far from the ship.

I didn’t like feeling like I was a liability, like I was breakable. But, I admittedly found amusement in his attentiveness. After years on my own it felt a little nice to be taken care of.

One afternoon we were sitting in the hull, where I was helping him clean some of his blasters. I had no idea how much upkeep they required, all the polishing and reloading. Well, maybe that was just him and his tastes. I happily played along.

I was just finishing the barrel of his pulse rifle when there was a knock on the hull door.

We both jumped to our feet in surprise. He drew the blaster he wasn’t cleaning and slowly crept towards the noise.

“You stay here. I’ll take care of this.”

I drew my blaster and followed him, of course.

We opened the hull, backs flush with the sides of the door, ready to pounce, when I saw who was standing outside.

It was a tiny old woman. “Hello? Is anybody there?” she called out. I motioned for Mando to withdraw his blaster. He didn’t listen. I huffed as I put mine in the holster and walked out to greet her.

“What are you-Larkin!”

“Hi there, everything alright?” I asked, trying to angle my arms to cover the blaster on my belt.

“Ah, yes! Hello! Were you the one I saw tinkering on this ship?”

“I am,” I responded cautiously. It was true. I’d started updating the gas line underneath the cockpit that morning, but why she was interested in that was beyond me.

“Oh, good! I live in a town three or so klicks east of here. I saw your ship fly overhead a few days ago and I knew I needed to find you. You see, we have a water filter and it’s been broken for nearly a month now. There’s a reservoir, but we’re beginning to run low and I can’t help but fear the worst. I’m afraid we do not have the tools to fix it. Would you be willing to come help? We have some credits.”

“Our services aren’t for sale,” Mando announced, emerging from his hiding spot. The woman’s eyes widened and she took a few wobbly steps backward. Living with him and knowing who he was, I sometimes forgot how intimidating Mando could be to strangers. And right then, he was definitely turning the whole fierce Mandalorian facade up a few notches.

My jaw clenched. “Can we talk?” I said as I grabbed his arm and dragged him into the hull.

“One second!” I called, giving her an apologetic smile as the door closed.

“What the hell?” I hissed, letting go of his arm. “She seems harmless, why are you being so weird about it?”

“We aren’t mechanics for hire. And we shouldn’t trust just anyone.” “Oh yeah, because you should never trust sweet old women. I’m going to help her, whether you’re coming or not. It’ll probably be an easy fix.”

Now he grabbed my arm. “You’re not going alone for a handful of credits.”

I shook him off. “You know I’m not going for the credits.”

He sighed, turning away from me.

“I’m going, Mando. I know you’re worried about me, so then come with. I trust myself more when you’re around.”

He thought for a moment, pacing back and forth, boots clunking on the floor.

“Fine,” he finally muttered.

I bit back a smile and nodded as I ran to grab my tool kit.

——

The woman, who introduced herself as Pira, took us to her village on a gondola she expertly maneuvered through brush and over streams and rivers. She seemed kindly, her white, fine hair blowing in the wind as she explained how she was the matriarch of her people. In the early days of the Empire, a mining facility had been built upstream from her village, polluting their water supply. The young people who went to work there during the day, given no other choice in the new economy, managed to pilfer enough parts to build a filter with what they learned engineering in the plant. Five years after the mine was built, there was an accident, an explosion she said, and no one came home. The Empire left the ruin they created, dissatisfied with their failed venture, and Reius had been quiet ever since.

The filter had persisted through all these years, still required as the creation of the mine had torn a hole through the earth, leaking chemicals into the water supply. But now, since it broke, they were getting desperate. We were their last chance.

When we approached the village, the people slowly crept out of their homes to see us. Some grimaced, others smiled and waved. Children looked at us with wide eyes from behind their mothers’ legs.

I took a moment to look around the village, finding it to be beautiful. The homes were to be made of sediment from the riverbeds, adorned with greenery and flowers. It seemed as if they’d emerged from the earth itself. As the sun went down, lanterns flickered to life in every direction, casting everything in gold.

Pira led us just beyond the village to a small stream, no wider than my bed. There was a metal box there, sputtering and choking out water from the other side. I could smell the chemicals.

Luckily, I was right. It was an easy fix, just like realigning the coolant in a ship. Mando stayed right by my side keeping watch as I worked (I nicely asked him to put the blaster away when there were no imminent threats). He held a light so I could see as the woods grew dark.

When I was done we went to find Pira. She was in the main square of the village in front of a large fire, surrounded by children, animatedly telling a story. Her expressions were heightened by the shadows cast by the flame, eyes bulging, hands waving. The kids were entranced, laughing and screaming at all the right parts.

I stopped just beyond the firelight’s reach to watch, leaning on Mando’s arm. It reminded me of when I was growing up. My mother was a fantastic storyteller, like Pira. She was an expert at doing the voices and movements, each character in my nightly bedtime stories rich, almost living and breathing. Tears unexpectedly sprung in my eyes as I thought of her. Mom cared so deeply about stories. Mine probably wasn’t what she imagined for me, but I hoped she’d still be proud.

I could tell Mando wasn’t looking towards Pira. He was looking at me. That happened every so often. I’d feel his gaze on me, even underneath the helmet. I always wanted to look back at him, but I would rather look into his eyes than a visor. I knew that was impossible to even think about, so I never looked.

Pira approached us as the crowd dispersed.

“All fixed. Just an issue with the piping. Nothing a good tool kit couldn’t help.” I said, handing over the box in my hands.

Her light eyebrows shot up. “Oh, no, I couldn’t possibly-“

“Please, I insist. I needed to update them anyway. If you ever have another problem, you’ll be able to fix it yourself then. Your village needs water.”

Suddenly I was wrapped in an enveloping hug. To my surprise, I hugged her back. She leaned back, cupping my face in her hand, the deep wrinkles in her face curving over smiling cheeks. “Thank you. My people thank you. Both of you,” she spoke, looking over at Mando. He stiffened, never good with compliments.

“You have no need to travel back to your ship in the dark. Come, I have an extra room you may stay in for the night.”

Mando somehow stiffened even more at that.

“Uh, that’s a very generous offer, but we’ll need to talk it through first if you don’t mind,” I responded.

She bowed her head. “Of course. If you do decide to stay I’m in the one just there,” she said, gesturing to one of the dwellings across the plaza, covered in vines. “If not, may the Maker watch over your journey.”

As she walked away, Mando said, “We shouldn’t stay.”

“Ok, but here me out. Reius is quiet, nearly remote now since the mining incident. And just look around you right now.”

The lanterns swayed in the breeze, casting light all around in golden wisps. The stars were infinite overhead from the lack of light pollution.

“We told Karga we’re on vacation,” I said slowly. “Just one night?” I gave him my most convincing smile, and it worked. Like always. ——

Pira was happy to see us. She led us to the spare room in the back of her home. It was modest, just a bed and a table. The door closed behind her after she said goodnight.

Just one bed. We stood there for a moment, frozen. It wasn’t like we didn’t sleep next to each other anyway, but we did sleep separately. It wasn’t a big deal. Not a big deal at all.

“I’ll sleep on the floor,” he blurted out.

“No, that’s stupid,” I shot back, mildly offended for no specific reason. “We can both sleep on the bed.”

“I’m not taking off my helmet. Or my armor.”

I figured as much. He never did when we were outside the Crest. “Ok. I’ll just be sleeping by a block of beskar, then. Nothing new.” He huffed a little at that.

“I’ll take first watch,” he said curtly.

“Mando, we’re not on a job. You can relax.”

I might as well have told the sun not to rise, but I tried anyways.

I laid down first, staring up at the ceiling. I felt him lay down next to me, but I didn’t look. It reminded me of the first night I slept next to him with the blindfold. The nerves, the tension, it was all the same.

“That can’t be comfortable,” I muttered.

“I’m used to it.”

“Ah.”

It was about as relaxing as a business meeting with Karga, neither of us knowing what or what not to do.

“I’m, uh...I’m going to sleep now,” I said after a long period of silence.

“Am I stopping you?”

“No! No. I just...I don’t know. Thought I’d announce it.” Maker, what the hell was I saying?

“Thank you for sharing.”

I sighed, covering my face to hide my smile. “Goodnight, Mando.”

Surprisingly, I slept well. He made the bed warm with his body heat, even underneath the armor.

When I woke up the next morning curled into his side, neither of us said anything. It was like an unspoken agreement. Unspoken words.

[randomthunk]

Creating fic ideas of your favorite streamed D&D campaign? It's more likely than you think. (Listen it was going to happen why question it.) Me and senpai @rubycosmos​ have schemed up an actually plausible story where the past of Percival Milquetoast comes back up and the group has to attend a fancy party in fancy dress. This is probably a remnant of one of our favorite Oxventures being Heist Society. And I do plan on drawing peanut gallery Dob-Merilwen-Egbert, don't think I forgot about them.

[shankss-magnificent-ass]

Imagine being the reptile catcher for the red haired pirates

The red force is docked at a desert island

You: *exploring a small ruin while the core crew is looking at some maps when you find a snake*

Rockstar: oh my god! That's a false Sand King Viper!

You: *grabs it below it's head* cool

Rockstar: *speechless*

You: *goes over to Shanks* look what I found!

Shanks: *turns his head to see a snake a foot from his face and he throws himself backwards* WHOA!

Benn: what the fuck (y/n)!

You: what I thought boys liked this sort of stuff? *Looks at the Snake*

Shanks: throw it away throw it away now!

You: but

Shanks: *Uses his captain voice and glares at you* THROW IT AWAY!

You: *yeets it* what's the big deal it's just a little snake?

Shanks: I can't stand reptiles

Benn: none of us can

You: why? They're virtually harmless?

Shanks: key word being virtually! Not totally.

You: okay, thought boys liked that sort of thing, but you don't, noted and won't do it again.

The red force is docked at a small tropical port

You: *sorting the ships map collection*

Shanks: *yells in panic on the other side of the boat*

You: *waits and listens for more yelling*

Benn, Yassop, and several other men: *start yelling as well*

You: *hears glass shatter some where on board the ship* I swear to the gods those sons a bitches better not have broken anything important or mine. *Goes to the galley where the noise is coming from*

Several crew members: *standing on a table*

Benn: *pushing yassop towards the sink*

Yassop: * holding a broom like a weapon*

Shanks: *squatting in the sink, wielding a ladle and pot lid in oven mit clad hands* I want that damn thing off my ship

Source of the noise: *a horny and scared lizard trying to run away from them*

You: *picks it up* what the hell are you guys doing?

Shanks: throw it off the ship throw it off my damn ship

You: but we're out at sea

Shanks: yes! Now get that scaley runt off my ship please

You: I'm not throwing it overboard

Few days later, the crew is hiking through a high altitude jungle to get some weird specific thing shanks wants

Shanks: we rest here for a few minutes *leans against a tree*

You: *goes over to him, hooks your fingers into the waist of his trousers, and pulls him towards yourself*

Shanks: *Feels the glide of your knuckles and the dull scraping of your ring along the skin of his pelvis making him gasp* what are you doing?

You: there's a leaf-tailed gecko on that tree

Shanks: *very flustered* oh, thank you

You: *walks off*

Benn: you alright?

Shanks: I... I think I'll go take a dip in the stream.

Yassop: but it's full of snow melt, it'll be freezing.

Shanks: I'm counting on it.

[niqhtlord01]

Humans are weird: Planetary Assaults

Few people can say that they’ve witnessed the end of their people.

To see the works of countless generations before you, the toils of your ancestors stretching back centuries, the greatest achievements of your people had made wiped away in a few days as if they were nothing but dust in the wind. 

I remember the day human ships struck orbit above our world. 

I remember  the fury of our orbital stations as they sought to hold them at bay as hundreds of their ships exited jump space.

I remember the second sun that shun across our world when the Mobious Prime station’s core went critical and detonated. The debris showering across half a continent and setting the skies ablaze. 

But most of all....

I remember the black ships as they came from the heavens.

Our judgement was at hand..........

We thought ourselves superior to every living creature in the galaxy, that none could match our culture and military might. We sought to conquer those we saw as less fortunate and bring them into the light of our empire and raise them above the shallows they had lived in. This went on for centuries until we finally came across humanity. 

A backwards people living in the darkest corner of the universe, our fleets of glistening ships entered their system with the chorus of hope and deliverance on our lips. We set down on their lifeless red world and began to recreate it into something beautiful, something to show them our might and strength. 

They responded by swatting our ships from their skies and sending  them plummeting to the red world below. 

War broke out then and the weight of humanity bore down on us from all quarters until now our very home world was besieged. 

What few orbital guns we had left fired bright lances of energy into the night sending a dozen or so ships plummeting to their fiery grave. But for every dozen struck down it felt as if another hundred rushed to take their place. 

High in orbit their ships targeted our guns and silenced them until all that was left was the army. Their ships landed all across the world and as their doors lowered and slapped against the soil of our world I saw the face of our enemy for the first time. 

Clad in polished green armor and a face mask that resembled a demon of old the human soldiers stormed out of their ships and into our gunfire. Countless died as they crossed the terrain to meet us. Once their compliment of soldiers had left the dropships closed their doors once more and rushed back to the skies making way for more and more dropships to take their place.

What unnerved me most about these humans wasn’t their tenacity, nor their vigor to storm into combat; but how none of them made a sound. It may have very well been their helmets dampened all sounds they made but as I fired upon them I watched them tumble and collapse to the ground like a children's toy as the strings have been cut and the ones behind continue over as if their fallen comrade was nothing more than a speed bump. 

The human soldiers had been pinned by our fire and were taking horrendous casualties when the heavy duty dropships arrived. Their doors opened wide and instead of soldiers came great mechanical machinations of war. Armored vehicles with weapons so massive they were more like mobile weapons platforms fired and tore apart our defensive works like paper while large slow moving troop transports lumbered across the battlefield. Our mines exploded underneath the monster’s treads but it merely rocked the behemoth as it pressed onward. 

When it arrived at our defensive line the front opened up and great gouts of flame shot out and swallowed my comrades whole. As I crawled away I saw a gaping maw open and out came more human soldiers. Their weapons fire was precise and quick as they cleared out the remaining defenses. I managed to escape the nightmare to the cities but even behind their shields I found no refuge. 

From miles away the humans cannons roared and their shells smashed into the shields like a heavy rain. The bombardment lasted three hours before the shield fell and then the shelling was upon us now.

Buildings crumbled like they were made of sand, streets lay ruined and crowded with the burnt remains of vehicles and the broken bodies of the dead, and everywhere I turned all I saw was destruction and chaos. I curled up into a ball then I kept my eyes shut. At least then I would not see my end coming.

 After what felt like an eternity the shelling ceased and I opened my eyes. What I saw made me believe that I had died and had passed to the world beyond. 

The streets were silent, as if the hell it had just endured was a distant memory. A layer of dust coated everything like snow as it continued to fall from the battered towers around me. 

From behind me i hear something rustling beyond the dust plums  and thought it was another survivor. 

Marching through the dust like gods of death came the humans. 

A squad of their soldiers slowly marching through the dust, weapons raised, helmets pondering the street back and forth looking for the smallest ounce of a threat to crush without hesitation. 

I was on my hands and knees when they came upon me an I looked up at the one in the front. I could not tell what expression the human had under their mask, if they spouted a devilish grin from ear to ear as the leaders had proclaimed or if they really did have five throats from which to eat our children. 

All I could see was those red lenses watching me unflinching. The human’s head cocked to the side slightly as they observed me; so did a few of their fellows but most continued to watch the street. 

One of them stepped forward, reaching behind their backs for something of what I still do not know to this day but I imagine at night as I look into the darkness of my ceiling that it was a weapon of some sort. A way to finish me off, put me out of my pain.or maybe to exact some measure of revenge. 

The one in the front who had been pondering me held out a hand and the other human stopped. No words were spoken and yet with a simple gesture the human had returned to their position.

Tilting their head back to me once more the lead human continued to watch me for a few moments and I felt as if the soldier was pitying me. Without an indication the lead human continued past me without a sound. 

Crunch.crunch.crunch. 

Out of that entire battle that is the sound I remember the most. The sound of my would be killers footsteps walking by. 

crunch.crunch.crunch......

The rest followed behind them, though the one who had been reaching for something lingered behind watching me longer before quick pacing after their comrades. 

The humans did more that day then just leave my body broken in the ruins of my world. 

They shattered my will and left the broken pieces along the ground as they marched forward. Everything my people had done became nothing but dirt beneath their feet as they marched towards their own future. 

[doctenwho]

Lured Desire

Hello! Thank you for the prompt! I’m glad you liked Not a Cat Person! Sorry this took a bit, you caught me in the process of moving! This was alot of fun to write when I finally figured out how to make it work! I wrote this three times; it got deleted once, I forgot what I was doing once (that one’ll probably be made into something else), and then there was this copy!

Hopefully it’s close to what you’re looking for! I tried to follow your prompt as best as I could, so I hope you like it!

Summary: Check out the prompt!

Warnings: I don’t think there really is any for this one.

Word Count: 6,524

*Gif is not mine, credit to the creator*

The landing was rough. Unexpected. It was enough to rattle both you and the Doctor to the floor.  

You lost your footing, falling backwards. You managed to catch yourself on the guard rail behind you, but it didn’t really offer much as a way to balance. Not when the whole of the TARDIS was quaking with the rails. The Doctor had been flung from the console as well, but he was quick to get back to his feet and start pushing buttons and pulling levers to try and steady the TARDIS.  

You pulled yourself to your feet, keeping a strong grip on the railing. The TARDIS was still moving, shaking and plummeting. You didn’t need the Doctor to tell you that the TARDIS was crashing, you’d been in enough TARDIS crashes to know when it was happening.  

Besides, even if you did attempt to talk to the Doctor, he probably wouldn’t even acknowledge you. He did really have better things to be worried about if his TARDIS was crash landing. There wasn’t much he could do, but there was always something that could make things easier—less messy.  

It took a few minutes for it to stop feeling like you were dropping right out of the air, and for the floor to stop vibrating and settle on solid ground. The Doctor still didn’t seem pleased, a foul look on his face as his hands shot out to fidget with different parts of the control console.  

You let him work in silence for a few more minutes, waiting in case anything more happened that could result in you falling on your arse, before cautiously making your way towards the man doing stressed circles around the TARDIS console.

“What happened?” you asked as you approached him. He barely paused in his movement. His hands were still busy, like the time and space ship was still falling, which you were quite sure wasn’t the case. He glanced at you briefly, then turned his attention towards the screen he’d pulled away so you couldn’t see. “Did we crash?”

“No,” the Doctor replied sharply without so much as a glance in your direction. “We didn’t crash, we fell. We fell a bit and then settled. There’s a difference, (y/n).”

“Okay,” you frowned, moving closer to him so you could see what he was doing. A crash was a crash to you, falling usually resulted in a crash, but you weren’t about to go against the Doctor when he was already so riled up.  

“We fell, and it doesn’t make sense,” the Doctor muttered, but you weren’t too sure whether he was talking to you, or just speaking aloud to himself, “it doesn’t make sense. How could we have...”

His voice faded off, as he hunched into reading whatever was on the screen. Most of it was in what you assumed was Gallifreyan—something the Doctor would do when he didn’t want you to see what was happening. The TARDIS wouldn’t translate her mother tongue, so it was a failsafe for the man to revert things to Gallifreyan instead of English so you couldn’t read along.  

With him completely distracted by the screen, you moved towards the doors. He didn’t seem to notice you, and if he did, he didn’t bother saying anything. You don’t know what overcame you—you never acted before the Doctor explained more.  

Alien planets, or different time periods weren’t to messed around with. Especially without the Doctor’s incite. You’d never just gone to open a door, but something was pulling you towards the doors. Towards what was on the other side of the doors. Whatever was out there...

The doors opened easily, and you peeked your head out to see what was around you.  

“Uh, Doctor?” You blinked, taking a step out to gaze around you. You could faintly see the man’s head look up from the screen inside the TARDIS out of the corner of your eye, but you were too busy studying your surroundings to really take note of the complete alarm in his eyes.

“(Y/N)!” the Doctor’s voice called, when he finally took notice of your absence. The man’s eyes shot around the room hurriedly, before falling on the open doors. It didn’t take a genius to put two and two together, your absence in the TARDIS console room and the open doors.  

“What the bloody hell do you think you’re doing?” he snarled as he shot around the console to pull you back into the TARDIS. “We’re floating through--” the man froze when he reached the doorway, hand locked on your elbow with a tight, protective grip. He looked around, studying everything with an expression of disbelief and utter confusion, “we’re... we’re landed in a hallway?”

You glanced back to the man holding you securely, though you weren’t so sure it was needed when you were stood on solid ground, before looking back down the hallway.  

It was a long hallway; you couldn’t even see the end of it. It was beige walls, with lines of white trim leading down along the bottom of the floor. The floor was carpeted, a neat tan that matched perfectly with the beige and white trim. There was a line of circular light fixtures spread about five feet apart, leading down the center of the ceiling, all the way down the hallway as far as you could see.

The walls were lined with large photo frames, they were wooden; a sturdy looking wood, that had been carved to the smallest detail, stained dark brown and completely identical all the way along the hallway.

Everything was completely symmetrical, lining up perfectly with an exact copy on the wall across from it.  

The frames were empty, from what you could see where you stood. There was a blank sheet of canvas, or cardstock, or maybe even a blank photograph from a polaroid. None of the frames in your line of sight had anything more than a blank center.

“What is this place?” you question quietly, managing to draw your attention away from the walls and frames before you, to glance back at the Doctor’s attentive eyes sweeping over everything. You couldn’t place any of the emotions crossing the Doctor’s face, it was a flurry of multiple—

“Noh,” the Doctor said softly, more to himself. He took a step back into the TARDIS, pulling you in with him by the grip on your arm. When your feet were back on the solid TARDIS flooring, the Doctor released his grip on you and took another step back, “no, no, no.” He moved quickly back to the console, pulling the screen towards him, “that can’t be right. That’s not... it can’t be right. It’s impossible.”

“What can’t be right?” you asked with a frown, following behind the Doctor. The screen was back to English, but to be fair, you still needed the Doctor to explain things to you. To you, it was all science-y mumbo-jumbo—which was barely a step up from Gallifreyan.  

“We’re in orbit still,” the Doctor pointed out on the screen. “The TARDIS is currently in orbit. We’re not... we can’t be landed. That,” he gestured wildly to the open TARDIS doors, “shouldn’t exist, we’re orbiting space, (Y/N), there aren’t corridors and, and photo frames in space.”

The Doctor stepped away from the control panel, letting out a groan-growl as he carded his fingers through his mussed hair roughly, “it’s impossible. We literally aren’t landed on anything. The TARDIS says we’re still moving, that we’re still orbiting.” The Doctor paced back and forth, anxiously, “what’s out there doesn’t exist—shouldn't exist. We’re caught in orbit, on some sort of platform that doesn’t exist. On something that the TARDIS, who recognizes everything, doesn’t recognize.”

“Are you sure the TARDIS is right?” you asked softly, leaning to look out the doors. The Doctor turned to glare at you, opening his mouth to defend his TARDIS, but you continued before he could, “it looks pretty real to me. I was standing out there before, and it was... it was like walking on carpet. Didn’t feel space-y at all.”

“The TARDIS isn’t wrong.” the Doctor scoffed on the time and space machine’s behalf, “the TARDIS has never been wrong. We’re in orbit, (Y/N). We’re stuck in orbit on... on whatever it is out there. I don’t even know what that is.”

“It seems alright to me,” you really had no idea where that came from, “we should look around.”

“You want to look around a strange space platform that the TARDIS says doesn’t even exist?”

“Uhm... yeah?”  

“And you’re alright?” the Doctor asked carefully, taking a couple steps towards you. You raised a questioning eyebrow and frowned at him. “You’ve been traveling with me for ages and not once have you been so sure about a planet—about anything like this. You’re hesitant about planets I assure you are completely fine, but now, when I tell you something’s not right, you want to explore?”

“Of course I’m alright,” you scoffed, “I just want to explore a bit, what’s so bad about that? It looks like earth, like some kind of weird earth museum, or something. Besides, don’t you want to see what’s at the end of the hallway?”

The Doctor studied you for a moment, then studied the open doors of the TARDIS for a moment as well, before he looked back at you. He really didn’t like disappointing his companions, and he was always up for an adventure.  

The Doctor seemed to be seriously debating it.  

“We really should leave, we don’t know this place, or who or what inhabits it,” he huffed, “but I'm intrigued now. You’re right, I do want to see what’s out there. A hallway in the middle of space, orbiting on its own—and not only that, a hallway that drew in the TARDIS. It’s impossible, completely impossible, but brilliant all the same!”  

The Doctor paused, seeming to shake himself from his excitement, “are you completely sure you want to go? I have no idea what’s out there, or what’s at the end of the hallway. This is here for a reason; space doesn’t just make random corridors for no reason.”

“I’m sure,” you nodded. “I wanna see if any of those frames have any actual pictures. Maybe there’s like stolen earth museum masterpieces—something by Picasso or Van Gogh or somethin’. There’re so many things that’ve gone missing through the years.”

“Aliens stealing earth things?” the Doctor muttered with a frown, “not unheard of. It’s possible.”

There was a moment where neither of you moved, then the Doctor was moving towards the doors. “Right then,” he cleared his throat, he was looking at you as he marched towards the doors, “you need to stay close to me. I don’t know this place, or planet, or whatever it really is. We’re not staying long, just a quick peek around and then we’re leaving, alright?”

The Doctor paused in the doorway, leaning out, to glance around without stepping out of the TARDIS, despite the fact you’d already stepped out once. He frowned, still uncertain before he stepped out. He reached his hand in, an offering to you, which you moved to grab.

“Sounds good to me,” you smiled, gripping his hand and following him out. The TARDIS doors closed behind the two of you, since the Doctor had stepped out too and no one was inside.  

“It looks very earthlike,” you mumbled as the two of you started walking. Slow and hesitant.

“Indeed it does,” the Doctor agreed, “I seriously don’t know what this is, or how it’s doing what it is. Be careful, and stay close.”

“I always am,” you laughed good-naturedly, which drew a small, fond smile from the man.  

The two of you walked for a while. The TARDIS could no longer be seen behind you, but the hallway before you were still going. It was a very long hallway. You’d dropped the Doctor’s hand a while ago, in order to walk closer to the frames and gaze inside to see if you could see any differences between them all.  

He was doing his own studying, watching everything like the frames would jump out at him, which you could understand given what he’d seen and done in his many years of life. He muttered things to himself, and periodically glanced your direction to keep a tab on you.  

It was almost cute how protective the Doctor was of you. How protective he was of his select few companions he’d travel with. The ones he chose out the billions of people on earth.  

The Doctor stopped every few frames to bleep them with his sonic screwdriver, but nothing came up. As far as you, the Doctor and the screwdriver knew, they were just ordinary frames. You could almost see the deep, unsettling confusion clouding the Doctor’s eyes.  

But, you kept walking, almost as if something was pulling you along. Like you were tethered to something and you just had to find it.

----

The Doctor wasn’t sure what to make of this place. Not when neither his TARDIS or his sonic screwdriver could track or source anything regarding it. It simply shouldn’t exist. Some sort of spurious world that he’d never heard of, or seen.  

Something that shouldn’t be here. It wasn’t the right make to even be orbiting like it was, and it certainly shouldn’t have been able to draw the TARDIS in. It was impossible. He couldn’t think of a single way that this could be happening.  

The Doctor followed along a few steps behind (Y/N), who continued on without much thought. It was rather odd that (Y/N) was more excited and adventurous about this strange place than the Doctor was. Maybe because she was had a fresh mind, she still hadn’t completely figured out that things in space couldn’t be trusted.  

There was a difference between being hesitant to jump right into things, and being critical of things before even thinking about taking a step out. Like earlier, when (Y/N) had stepped right out. The Doctor hadn’t even noticed her doing it, too busy trying to figure things out. As far as he’d known, they’d been stuck orbiting space—she could’ve stepped out into nothing. Nothing but space, because that’s what the TARDIS said they were doing.

The Doctor was far older than (Y/N), hundreds and hundreds of years older. He’d seen so much. He’d been trapped so many times. He’d been left with nothing more times than he could count. He’d put his companions in danger way more than he’d even dare to think about. He’d been around for practically forever at this point, and he knew when to be cautious.  

As much as he tried though, he couldn’t figure anything out about this place. It was getting irritating at this point. He was confused, and irritated, and maybe even a bit pissed off that (Y/N) had been so reckless when they’d first arrived.  

The man sighed to himself, drawing his hand through his hair again. He dropped his hands down, stuffing them in his trouser pockets as he followed behind his companion. He didn’t even know how long they’d been wondering about the hallway for, and he was about to make the decision that they’d spent enough time here when he heard it.  

It was soft, like a whisper.  

A collection of soft whispers, faint and unintelligible. Unintelligible, but inviting. Drawing him closer. It was not a language he knew, and the TARDIS hadn’t translated it for him. But he was curious.  

Was there something here? Someone else beside him and his companion?  

The Doctor’s eyes dropped down to the floor for a moment before he looked up and around. It felt like the whispering was coming from everywhere at once. He took a couple more hurried steps, the whispers growing louder until he turned suddenly. He didn’t remember thinking about turning, it just happened. He wasn’t even sure his brain had commanded the action, but when he looked up, he was met with a picture frame.  

This one, unlike the ones across from it, or on either side, had an actual image. It wasn’t a blank frame like the others. And it wasn’t a picture at all. Not really.  

It was moving.  

It was... more like a television show, than a picture.  

He was instantly engrossed in the moving photo.

It was... it was (Y/N). She was in a garden; it was a beautiful garden. There were multiple types of flowers, and it was sunny. It almost made him smile. Her eyes were watering, but she was smiling, holding a bouquet of flowers. She was older than the (Y/N) he was currently with, but it was undeniable that this woman in the photo was his current companion.

She looked good, perfectly fine, but maybe a little sad. He instantly wanted to make her happy again, to jump into the picture and hug her, or give her a kiss on the cheek. He wasn’t quite sure what to make of her sad smile.  

It wasn’t terribly sad, she still had the same brightness about her, the one that had attracted him to her in the first place, but she looked as if she were reminiscing an event from prior. Maybe a memory from a passed family member, or something. Remembering happy things, but sad that they weren’t around anymore.  

He wondered for a moment where he was in this picture. He’d never really thought about leaving her, not really. He wanted to hold onto her for as long as he could, but he could understand if he’d needed to leave her behind for whatever reason. He’d had to do the same for all his companions at one point or another.

The thought of his companions growing old and leaving him made him physically ill, but he knew it was bound to happen eventually. How he’d just regenerate and leave them in the dust—continue on with his life when they were aging and dying like the humans they were. He’d always end up alone in the end, as it had been for hundreds of years.  

In the photo, (Y/N) was walking, the flowers cradled in her arms. The path she walked on was days away from being completely overgrown, like it wasn’t travelled much. Where ever she was going, she didn’t go often.  

He waited, watching closely until she paused in the photo, her eyebrows furrowing as a tear trailed down her cheek. The Doctor leaned towards the picture, squinting to see what she was seeing. He wanted to reach out and touch it... touch his companion, but he didn’t.  

In fact, he took a step back in surprise when his eyes landed on what she was now kneeled in front of, the flowers set on the ground before it.  

It was the TARDIS. The blue Public Use Police box parked in that garden. It was covered in overgrown plants, vines reaching up along the paneling of the TARDIS. It didn’t... look much like the TARDIS anymore, old and unused like a real London Telephone box, but to him, it was unmistakably his precious TARDIS.  

(Y/N) was sitting now, knees pulled up to her chest, with her arms wrapped securely around them. Her chin rested on the indent between her knees, and her attention was focused on the TARDIS. Her eyes were sad now, much more so than earlier, and she was crying again. Tears falling from her face and dripping down to the ground beneath her.  

The Doctor didn’t understand for a moment. His TARDIS was there, obviously had been for a while. But he was nowhere to be seen. (Y/N) was visiting his TARDIS, hidden away in a garden and covered by overgrown plants that would’ve taken years to crawl up the length of his little blue box. He’d abandoned his TARDIS?

Then, it clicked.  

He hadn’t abandoned his precious TARDIS intentionally. The answer was literally in this picture; from the overgrown garden, to the TARDIS standing withered and old without him, to the bouquet of flowers placed before his TARDIS, all the way down to the soft tears falling from his companion’s face.  

It was all there.  

He was dead.  

He’d died somehow and left behind his TARDIS, and his companion.  

He was dead.  

He was strangely accepting of this. His companion outliving him for the first time since he’d first picked up a human to travel with him. It was... a nice change of pace. He wasn’t the last one left anymore. He was... gone.  

The last Time-Lord in existence, and he was gone. His whole race put to rest with him. He wasn’t put off by the idea. He almost... liked it. That he wasn’t the one to be losing someone this time. He still felt terrible that his companion was bringing flowers to his, what he assumed was his, resting place with his TARDIS, but he couldn’t find it in himself to be mad, or upset.

It was almost... freeing. He wanted to touch; to run his fingers across the photo. To place a finger over his companion staring sadly at his TARDIS, or maybe even touch the TARDIS. His hand hovered over the picture, and it almost... rippled like he could just hop right in.

This was a... a desire he hadn’t known he’d had.

The man turned away from the frame abruptly, using all his willpower to draw his hand away and turn away from the picture. He’d almost touched it. Had been close enough to see it ripple. What would’ve happened had he touched the picture?

What would’ve happened had he reached for that desire he’d had hidden within him?

The man whipped out his sonic screwdriver, bleeping the frame he’d just been staring into quickly. For a second, one single second, the screwdriver detected something, but in the next moment, the Doctor was watching the colourful canvas, (Y/N), the garden and the TARDIS included, fade back to the identical blanks surrounding it.  

In a matter of seconds, it was like the photo he’d seen hadn’t existed at all. Like he hadn’t been drawn to a desire he hadn’t realized he had.  

With the picture gone, the Doctor carefully let his fingertips brush along the surface of what had been that picture. Nothing happened, there was no ripple this time. It was like touching any other sheet of canvas.  

It didn’t make sense. It really didn’t make sense. Nothing about this place made any sense.  

“We’ve been here long enough,” the Doctor spoke firmly, suddenly afraid of what this place was capable of. He turned to look down the hallway at his companion, “let’s head--” the man froze, “(Y/N)?”

She was gone. The hallway around him was empty. Nothing but blank picture frames. “(Y/N)?” he called louder, in case she’d continued on while he’d been distracted by the picture. The Doctor turned back the way the two of you had been coming, but you weren’t that way either. “(Y/N)!”

He was sprinting down the hallway before he even realized he was. He needed to get to her before anything else got to her. Before she got hurt, or was put in danger. Or worse, before one of the pictures spoke to her like they had to him.  

He’d barely been able to draw himself away from the photo, a human wouldn’t stand a chance against it. No human would have the willpower to pull away from a desire like the one he’d been shown. And, as much as he cared for (Y/N), she really was no exception to that fact.  

The man ran as fast as he could, passing hundreds of picture frames in just minutes before someone came into view.  

Just as he’d feared, (Y/N) was staring into one of the photo frames, mesmerized by whatever was happening. The Doctor barely managed to stop himself from running into her, as he reached hurriedly for her arms and tried to pull her away from the picture.  

To him, it was blank. It looked no different to any of the other canvases on the walls. He bleeped the canvas with his screwdriver when you barely budged, and to his surprise, he was getting all kinds of feedback from it this time. Something more than a simple photo frame was hung on this wall, and it was quickly drawing his companion in as it had to him.  

He bleeped you as well, frowning thoughtfully at the reading it got off your head. 

“(Y/N),” the Doctor pleaded, taking your hands into his own, “I know it looks ideal, whatever it is you’re seeing, but it’s not real. Please, come back to me, whatever you’re seeing, it’s not there. It doesn’t exist. Don’t touch it, alright? Don’t touch, it’s not safe.”

You made no movements, but you still didn’t draw your attention from the photo. The Doctor chewed his bottom lip, thoughts flying faster and more anxiously than he was sure they ever had. He had to do something. He wasn’t sure what would happen if you touched the picture you were seeing, but he wasn’t about to find out.  

With no other way around it, the man pushed you back carefully, just enough so that he could come between you and the canvas. You didn’t react, eyes wide and unseeing, but so focused on the blank canvas in front of you. The Doctor reached up to cradle your jaw in his hands for a moment, thumbs brushing along your cheeks.

You moved to look around him, back at the picture, to which he gently tightened his hold and directed your gaze back onto him. You didn’t move again after being corrected.  

He drew in a breath, pulling his hands back for a second to see if you’d move (you didn’t) before he lifted his hands and settled his fingertips to your temples. He squeezed his eyes shut, concentrating on accessing you mind. He couldn’t see what you could looking at the picture, but he could through your eyes.

----

You’d lost the Doctor somewhere along the hallway. He’d stopped and... even if you’d wanted to stop and see where he’d gone, or perhaps even wait for him, something inside you directed you along.  

The whispered were calling to you. They’d started a while back, and you’d been following them. You didn’t understand them, but they were inviting. They were calling you over, trying to show you something.  

You followed them, step after step, going exactly where the whispers directed you. Or, maybe you were following they’re volume, since you couldn’t really understand them.  

Everything went quiet suddenly. You glanced around the hallway, before your eyes caught sight of a splash of colour. One of the frames had an actual picture in it.  

You reached up to rub your eyes, in case you were seeing something, since it had been nothing but whites and browns all the way down the hallway, and now suddenly there was this one single picture with colours.  

When you blinked again, the colours were still there. You stepped towards the picture—it was like nothing you’d ever seen before. But... at the same time it was familiar.  

It really wasn’t anything special, a small house with a white picket fence surrounding the property. There houses on either side, ordinary and uniform, but each with personality. A cute little neighborhood.

The closer you looked, the more you could make out. The small windows on the house were full, detailed beyond imagination. But all of them... there was a little you in there.  

One of the windows featured you with a pet—a cat or a dog, you couldn’t really make it. Possibly even a rodent, or a reptile, or something else along the lines. It was hard to see, but you could tell you adored whatever it was.

Another featured you with small children, possibly your own children, but you couldn’t be sure. They were cute, playing on the floor with you, showing you objects and giggling. You’d never really thought much about kids, but it was weird seeing some in the perfect little house the picture had.

One of the other windows was dimly lit, a living room or something in the late hours of the evening. You were cuddled up with someone, a significant other, on the couch, both watching a film, talking and laughing.  

The last window housed you, and your friends and family all sitting together and laughing. The friends and family you had barely even spoken to since meeting the Doctor. The ones who left messages on your answering machine, and invited you out, despite not knowing you were adventuring in Outerspace with a literally alien.

They were all so domestic. So ordinary. It was... normal life. You assumed each window was a different representation of something. A pet, wanting children, a perfect significant other, and to be closer to those you love. It was cute, a cute concept.

You didn’t see the Doctor though. He was nowhere to be seen. He, and the TARDIS. Not so much as a glance at the Doctor.  

The picture changed in the blink of an eye, and you were walking. In the picture. A different scene, the house was gone, and it was just you. You were just... walking down the street. And it looked nice. A relaxing walk. Nothing like exploring an alien planet with the Doctor, but you weren’t sure if that was a good thing, or a bad thing.

You passed a blue police box, and barely batted an eyelash. You strolled passed a man sitting on a bench, which, when you looked closer, realized was the Doctor. He made no effort to speak to you, and you breezed right by him like you’d never even met him.  

And... maybe you hadn’t in whatever this picture was showing you. It was hard to imagine never meeting the Doctor, and never seeing the things you’d seen in your travels. But this imagery the picture was supplying... it made it easier to think like that, not that it was really possible.

Everything the picture showed you was normal. Ordinary. It was relaxing. You could just... go for a stroll at any point, or get in the car and visit your friends, or your parents. You could step out of your door without being afraid.  

There were no aliens, or potential death threats, or kidnappings, or strange creatures trying to get you, or to chase you around. You weren’t a part in trying to destroy the universe (unfortunate timing really), and you also weren’t a piece to the solution to said problems. You were just there, one of the regular people down on earth.

You weren’t afraid for your life, or for the Doctor’s life on some strange planet... it was just earth. Normal earth, with normal people and normal activities. Normal everything.

You’d never met the Doctor in these... whatever they were. Possible futures? Alternate universes?

You’d never met him and... your life was normal. You lived a regular life, like everyone else. You weren’t one of the special few the Doctor selected to travel with him and... that didn’t bother you.  

It felt kind of nice actually, to be normal. To not be following the Doctor around on strange planets like a puppy, or to not be fearing for your life in a TARDIS crash landing. As much as you liked the Doctor, and your travels, you wouldn’t be disappointed or upset if... well, if none of it happened. If you’d never met the Doctor at all...

Your life looked like it would’ve been good, great even. Normal. Ordinary. Black and white. Vanilla.  

You’d been in some dangerous situations, had actually thought yourself dead on a couple of occasions. You relied heavily on the Doctor to keep you safe. It was a lot. All of it was. And... it would be nice to have it be calm. The calm after a storm.  

The whispering was back suddenly, louder than ever and urging you to reach up and touch the picture. It was promising things—a perfect life, a family, or a pet, anything your heart desired. It was promising to take away the pain of your traumas, and wipe your mind from all that caused you harm... the Doctor included.  

And you... you couldn’t help but reach up to touch the picture.  

It all sounded wonderful. Ideal, and perfect. A second chance without having to miss the Doctor because, well, you never would’ve met him in this timeline.  

Your hand was hovering by the picture, rippling what you’d thought was a canvas. The whispers were growing louder, urging and begging you to touch. You wanted what it was offering. Something deep inside you wanted to touch the picture, and get the life it had showed you.  

Your fingers got closer, and your mind started getting fuzzy and--

And everything stopped.  

Your hand froze in place and the Doctor’s face came into view. He was blocking the picture; all you could see was his face. And... you could feel his fingers on your face, gentle and careful. The whispers were getting softer, further away.  

“Please,” you heard. It was the Doctor, you thought. You knew his voice. He was pleading, voice tight and nervous, something you’d never heard before. “You can’t go, not yet. Please, it’s not real, (Y/N). You need to come back to me.”

You wanted to tell the Doctor that it looked pretty real to you. That you were so close to forgetting it all, and being normal. So close to a quiet life, without the hassle of a space and time machine, and a regenerating alien.

“I know,” the Doctor interrupted your thoughts as if he’d heard you. His voice was soft, maybe even hurt, “I know it seems perfect, but it’s not real, (Y/N). You need to snap out of it. You’re giving it what it wants, you’re feeding into it... You can’t. Don’t touch it, focus on me, alright? Focus here.”

You focused on the Doctor, on his soft pleads and appraisal. The whispers faded off to nothing and the colours behind the Doctor started fading away too, taking your quiet life away with them.  

It was a sharp shock that really woke you up though. You blinked your eyes shut, an intense stinging from them being open for so long. You fell forwards, your body finally relaxing after being lured away. You never hit the ground though, you fell right into the Doctor, who caught you and held you close. “You’ve done it,” he whispered, “good job, (Y/N).”

“What... what happened?” you asked carefully. You remembered it clearly. The want to be taken away. The need for a normal and quiet life without the Doctor. The pull the canvas had to it. Even the ripping in the supposed canvas. “I almost fell in a canvas.”

The Doctor gave a laugh, not nearly as bright as it usually was. His eyes were sad, and he was holding you longer than he usually did when the two of you escaped danger. “You resisted,” the Doctor replied quietly, “I’m quite proud of you, that’s no easy feat.”

“The picture was luring me in,” you blinked, “what even was that?”

“It... it showed you your deepest desire. One you... may not have known you had—or maybe you did. Whatever it was, was feeding off the dopamine in your subconscious with seeing the desire fulfilled.”

Deepest desire. A quiet life was your deepest desire. Your life without the Doctor was your deepest desire. You felt terrible that that’s what you subconsciously wanted, even though you hadn’t known it.

“Did you see it too?” You asked calmly, looking back at the now blank frame. It was completely gone. No trace left behind of your deepest desire.

The Doctor hesitated for a second. A second longer than he usually did, “no,” he looked down, “I didn’t. It was just a white canvas for me. Only you can see your deepest desire, it’s just a blank canvas for everyone else.”

You didn’t say anything for a moment, believing the Doctor’s words, but not really believing him. It sounded completely logical, but Time-Lords were incredible creatures, and you really had no idea whether or not he could actually see. You wished he couldn’t, that he hadn’t seen. You truly do love traveling with the Doctor... it just gets overwhelming at times. And... everyone wishes for a quiet life at some point, right?

“Let’s... let’s get back to the TARDIS. I think this has been enough excitement for the day, eh?”

The walk back was quiet, no whispering, or speaking. The frames on the walls did nothing. All uniform and identical just as when you’d come in. The TARDIS was further back than you remembered, but when you got to her, the Doctor ushered you in quickly.  

You were taking off before you really knew what was happening.  

“Do you think... all those frames had someone’s deepest desire in them?” you asked from where you were stood beside the console. The Doctor gave a shrug, pushing some buttons. He’d been quiet. Quieter than you could ever remember him being.  

“It’s possible,” he answered shortly. “I’d assume yes though. Curious travelers like us are the perfect target for something like this.”

“Oh,” you frowned, “what would’ve... what would’ve happened if you touched the picture?”

The Doctor finally looked over at you, eyes sad, and lips curved down in a frown, “I think it would’ve absorbed you and given you what it promised. It would’ve fed off the dopamine being created like it had been doing, and it would’ve kept you happy in your desire.”

“I’m glad you got me out then,” you replied, looking down at your feet.

“Are you?” the Doctor asked without looking up from the console. You were sure he was purposely trying not to look at you. He was hurt. Now, without the lure of the picture, you could tell. He was sad, and hurting.  

You frowned, thinking of something to say. You really didn’t believe he hadn’t seen your desire. Not with the whole kicked puppy look. He’d obviously seen something, and it hurt you that you made him feel like this.  

“Did you hear the whispers?”

“I did.” He gave a nod, still not really looking up from the console. You were flying again, away from this orbital pull, “I saw my desire, but I was able to pull myself out of it.”

“What was your desire?” You asked quietly.  

The doctor turned to you with a sad smile, “it wasn’t important,” he brushed off. 

He ran a hand through his hair, looking down to hide his frown, and when he looked up once more, all traces of emotions were gone. All the sadness, all the fear. His frown replaced by a bright grin. 

“Right then!” He chirped like the two of you hadn’t almost been lured into alien picture frames, “how about a visit to earth, huh? We can... let’s go meet your friends!”

<><><><><>

Thanks for reading! I hope you enjoyed, and please feel free to leave me prompts! They’re very welcome, and very appreciated!

[theficplug]

Girls Trip {Erik fic}

Warnings: 18+, smut.

{reader goes on a cruise with her girls during winter break post-breakup & meets Erik when she needs him most. The intro to a series. I hope that y'all enjoy this long ass intro x}

“Told you you'd like it! We know what you need.” your friend Lynelle says as you and your other 2 best friends step into the lobby of the ship.

Your original plan was to stay home and catch up on much needed sleep and netflix binge watching during Winter Break but Khadijah, Tasha , and Lynelle (Lennie)  had other plans.

They could never get on the same page to go on a proper vacation but the one time you wanted to be left alone they've decided to get it together. 

2 plane rides and now you're here on a cruise on the way to 'paradise'.

The last few weeks went by in a blur while you were buying bikinis, trying to contain your emotions, and leaving behind your frozen over city for Bali.

You'd be lying if you said that you weren't a little excited to be leaving behind a terrible end to a 4 year relationship.

“Girl I just paid 12 dollars for Netflix this month. I planned on staying home and re-watching The Get Down. I need to at them and ask them when they're gonna add Crooklyn." You say as your phone begins to go off. 

"Uh-uh, just cause your man had community dick don't mean you gotta feel like you did something wrong. You are the sweetest and most caring person I know and gave everything you had for that man. You are a strong beautiful talented black woman. You run your own business and don't need his ass for nothing. And if I were into girls I would've been shot my shot back in the 7th grade. Now, we gon' get tipsy, dance the night away in 23$ dollar heels, and find a fine ass beard to rid-"

You quickly cut off your best friend by answering your mother's call. You held onto Khadi's hand to let her know that her support means everything to you.

"Hey Mama. Yes I made it safe and sound." You say into the phone as you shake your head and laugh at your girls. 

"HEY MA " Khadi says waving as she smiles at the woman on the other side of the phone she's known for over half her life. 

"Hello Khadijah, are you behaving yourself ?" She asks as Khadi shakes her head with her tongue sticking out.

"MY GIRL." Your mother says as they both laugh and point at each other through the screen. 

"I'll talk to you later, enjoy yourself baby. Sometimes a little fun and laughter is the cure for heartache. Love you, be safe." She says before ending the video call.

"Alright , we all meeting up for the foam pool party after the tour right? Cause I need to shower and stuff first." You say as everybody agrees

An hour or two later you were standing in front of the hotel mirror giving yourself a pep talk in your new bikini. You eyed your reflection as you tell yourself that somebody son is gonna love on your fupa, and the 3 years wasted with Derrick isn't going to matter anymore. 

"Knees. Knees. Come on knees." Khadijah yells as Lennie and Tasha  drop it low and make it clap as a chorus of 'ayyeeee' erupts in the elevator. 

You make your way down to the lobby with the girls after throwing back a few shots in Lennie's room. You past by a group of other girls in the elevator and they were blasting Cash Shit from their phone. 

"Link up with us later." Paris says from the other group before moving over to the party already happening. 

The drinks are flowing through your system and Tasha is filming you for the gram as you sing along to the music. You accidentally trip backwards onto a man behind you before immediately apologizing and giggling.

"You good mama." He says as he catches you with one hand and the other still holding his drink. Without missing a beat he twirls you to the beat so that you can play it off. 

"What's the nigga name?" He asks as he takes another sip of his drink and tries to act like he ain't see you watching the suds slide down his scarred and chiseled chest to his happy trail.  

"Excuse me?" You ask confused as he flashes his gold fanged grill and cock his head towards the phone in Tasha's hand as she gives you a quiet  'oooh shit okay'. 

"The one you tryna prove a point to. Only name that matters now though is Erik." He says as he grinds against you and move your braids to your other shoulder. 

"Alright Erik, lemme see if you can keep up then." You tease him as you begin to whine on him and ride the beat as he keeps up behind you. You realize you have an audience now with his boys glancing over at you and your girls watching him. 

His hand holds you in place before he asks if it's alright if he kissed you. You nod before you know it his soft ass lips are on yours. He pulls at your bottom lip slightly while you continue to whine on him. 

"Thank you for the dance." You say before you place one final kiss to his lips as the song ends.

You walk over to Tasha before grabbing her hand and leaving to find Lennie and Khadijah 

You knew he was still standing there watching you walk away you turned to give him a look over your shoulder with a raised brow.

"Stop watching my booty" you mouth at him jokingly 

"YOU CAN'T EVEN BLAME ME. ITS FAT AS FUCK." He yells back to you over the music.

After an hour of dancing and having a good time with friends you only checked your phone once to find 3 messages from Derrick begging you to call him then two talking about how disappointed he was with you.

You stepped out onto the upper deck to tell him to stop calling you and ruining your good time. 

"I can do what I want. I'm fucking grown. All you ever did was sit at home on your ass and criticize me for every damn thing I did. I made sure you were happy when I wasn't even okay… And fucking my cousin was your way of showing me you loved me huh? Don't call me no more and stop calling my mama asking her about me too. " You yell into the phone before hanging up.

You stand there staring out at the ocean for a moment. Trying to breathe deeply and ground yourself so that you don't cry.

"You good?" You hear a voice call from behind you.

"What, you following me now?" You ask Erik as he pulls up one of the lounge chairs to sit next to you and light his blunt. 

"Nah, not at all. I came out here to smoke and chill. All that going on in there really ain't my scene. My boys got me to come here. They got white boys in there doing backflips off the balcony and shit. I probably would've still been at work right now." He say as he exhales and leans back against the lounge chair. 

You laugh softly before shaking your head. 

"That's how I ended up here. I was planning on spending Christmas and The New Year at home with my family. But my friends had this surprise for me to ring in the new year in Bali. And now here I am. I'd still rather be watching Godfather of Harlem. I gotta catch up." You say sitting next to him in the lounge chair. He instinctively wraps his arm around you letting you lay your head on his shoulder.

Granted, it probably seemed weird as hell to be cuddling with somebody you just met and barely knew but to both of you it just felt right in the moment.

"Godfather of Harlem ? That show is my shit. It's slept on forreal… If you ever in Oakland you should stop by sometime. I run a museum based on preserving black art and culture." He scrolls on his phone until he finds some of the pieces and shows it to you. But the main thing that stood out was Stevens Black Art & History: for the culture. 

"Erik Stevens?" You gasp and sit up to get a good look at him

"Yeah , why you looking like that? What's up?" He questions

"Oh my fucking God. We was best friends back in the day. It's me, look, minus the bifocals, braces, and that James Brown bob my mama gave me damn near every day." You say and he stares at you in awe for a second. 

"Damn it's really you." You says quietly as he runs his thumb over your cheek imagining you the way you looked in 5th grade.

You loved Erik growing up and spent almost all of your time together but after his father died you didn't get to say goodbye. He was taken into the system and after that you heard that he was in the military doing who knows what. You tried to find him but after a while it was no use. You couldn't believe how different he looked now. He looked tired down by the woes of life but still as beautiful as the day you met him.

" 'Member this?" You ask as you fish your out of the pocket of your cover-up and start playing Best Friend by 50 Cent. 

You watched as he looked up at you standing up to dance. You pull him up too as he puts out the blunt while laughing and stepping with you. 

"If I was your best friend, I want you 'round all the time. Can I be your best friend, if you promise you'll be mine?" You sing to him as he twirls you around 

"First we get the talkin, then we get the touchin. If we get pass the phone games we'll be fuckin. I kiss like the french therefore my tongue in your ear. Do it like the dogs do it girl and pull on your hair. For me a different scenery just mean a different position. In the tub or on the sink I improvise now listen. In the chopper or on the jet join the mile high club. I'm no fool I know money can't buy me love. But I'm a different type of nigga that make sure that you know. Instead of a rose, there's a hundred dozen of those. See I see somethin special when I look in your eyes. With your legs way back I see this pussy is mine. If you ain't sure when I'm talkin I don't tell you no lies. But there's things that you say that have me wonderin why. When I don't say what I'm thinkin it don't mean that I'm shy. Got on that shit you picked out for me that's why I'm so fly." He raps effortlessly while kissing softly on your neck and all those memories start flashing back to you as you sway with him.

"Damn you still remember all the lyrics to our song." You say to him as you look over to see your girls and some of his friends.

"You out here ?  Bitch! I thought I was gonna have to do an interview on First 48 for yo ass. I was gon' drop a raft over to come find you. You know I can't swim and I don't got my floaties with me." Khadi says as she walks in with Tasha and Lennie . 

"I'm sorry I came out here for fresh air and then ended up literally finding my fuckin childhood best friend. Before the baddest bitches on the planet came to be. There was THEE duo. Everybody meet Erik."

After everyone got to know each other. Y'all brought the party to the secluded little upper deck with the perfect view of the ocean. You had drinks , music, and good company almost enough to forget about the whole situation back home. 

"Girl you know I love you but my feet hurt and Sebastian said he gon' rub em" referring to the man she currently had her arms around. 

"Alright , we'll meet up in the morning for breakfast" you tell them before giving them kisses goodbye and heading out with everybody. 

Tasha and Lynelle were currently singing to each other and sharing cute kisses off to the side. You couldn't help but to smile and think of how true love must feel. To love and be fully loved back like that.

You were standing in front of your opened room door when you realized that his room is across from yours but he had no plans of sleeping in it.

"Uh-uh. Who said you were invited in?" You ask Erik with your index finger on his chest. 

"I thought you said you wanted to watch Netflix? We can order room service and everything. Whatever you want" he says to you licking his lips and closing the gap between the two of you. 

"I want to forget. I want to have fun. I want to feel loved and appreciated for once. That would be nice." You say quietly as he takes his hand in yours. Pressing small kisses to each of your knuckles.

He hesitates for a moment before leaning in to kiss you slowly. He held your face in his hands as he continued to back you into the room kicking it closed with his foot. 

 "I'm glad that we found each other. After all of this time. " You say to him in between kisses

"Believe it or not I kept that picture of us. The one your mama took of us at the zoo next to the monkeys. I took it with me on tour everywhere. Right next to my mama's picture in my wallet. I never lost a battle. I made it home in one piece. Shits wild." He said zoning out for a moment like he was going somewhere else. 

"Heyyy." You call softly. You move his hands from your waist 

" I've got you." You whisper to him before leading him to your bed and laying him back. 

You wrap your arms around him almost cuddling him as you lay your head on his chest while listening to his heartbeat and sitting on his lap. 

You place a soft kiss to his lips before moving away from the bed to change, settling on a large shirt and nothing else. 

Erik followed suit and just stripped to his boxer briefs before you come back to the bed carrying soda , your laptop, and snacks. 

"And before you ask. Yes, I packed my laptop because work never stops, and yes I packed snacks because I can't find Takis out here." You say chuckling softly while he shakes his head laughing softly. 

You both settle into a comfortable position before loading up the movie. You settled on Nappily Ever After but it wasn't long before he was softly kissing on your neck with his hand under your shirt.

"Gonna eat it from the back. That's cool with you" he mumble into your ear.

If that's cool with me? BIH, I'm trying to let you give me twins. Triplets even. Play it cool. Play it cool . You thought to yourself before saying a silent apology to your girl Sanaa Lathan as you quickly moved the laptop to the bedside table.

"Damn she pretty." He says before kissing each cheek and gripping the back of your thighs. You knew what was coming next as your hands found the headboard and arched your back.

You can feel his tongue begin to explore the back of your thighs to your folds as he bends you forward. 

You hiss softly as his hand began to roam. You looked back at him as his fingers enter you. He begins to slowly and deeply work you open for him. You knew that you were dripping at this point and couldn't contain how loud you're being.

You can hear him let out a groan as he gets his first taste. Before you know it he's devouring you like you're his favourite meal and is completely in his element. His hands are massaging over your cheeks while he suckles your clit and then slides his tongue in. You begin to work your hips down onto it as he's on his knees behind you. His fingers massaging skillfully over your clit. 

"That's how you want it? It's all for you." You egg him on shakily as you reach back to grab at his dreads knowing that you're nearing your orgasm. You thought you were seeing stars but the audacity of this man bringing his hand down hard across your left then right cheek and then the pom-pom itself, did it.

Your toes curled and your head was tilted back as you continued to ride his face and the orgasmic wave crashed over you so hard it took your breath with it. 

You called out his name speaking in all types of broken Xhosa as he begin to lap you up and savour your taste. 

When you stopped shaking he sat back on the bed, proud of himself as he licked his lips. 

You turned to face him and he wasted no time continuing to massage you.

But what you hadn't realized during changing you accidentally dialed Derrick. Who's now on the other end, yelling into the phone 

{to be continued! I hope that it was alright!}

[absolxguardian]

What the hell happened to Cobb Vanth and Freetown: An analysis

Most Mandalorian fans don’t know that this isn’t Cobb Vanth’s first appearance. He first appeared in the interludes of the Aftermath trilogy by Chuck Wendig. The trilogy took place 6 months to a year after the events of ROTJ, so four years before the events of the show.

But there’s a problem. There’s a level of incongruity between Cobb Vanth, the marshal of Mos Pelgo and Cobb Vanth, the sheriff of Freetown. It’s almost as if, rather than sharing a universe, the Vanth we meet in the show is inspired by the books. 

But the story group hasn’t given The Mandalorian free reign to trample over the new canon. Just like with the state of the Mandalorians in general, this change is best explained with the assumption that things went down hill since we last saw Vanth in Empire’s End. Plus some unreliable narration. 

Under the cut I explain three areas of weirdness. First, what we see in the flashback vs what we know of Vanth’s backstory. Second, how has Mos Pelgo gone so far downhill. Third, why he is suddenly so aggressive against the Tuskens he once made his own peace. I’ll explain what’s in the interludes as we go, so you don’t have to have read the trilogy.

I. The Flashback

First, some backstory for Vanth that wasn’t in the episode. He’s a former Hutt slave, with a slave brand on the back of his neck. That’s probably why he wears that scarf. Presumably, his freedom was related to Leia killing Jabba the Hutt- something that had a much larger effect on the stability of Tatioone and the Outer Rim than Endor really did. Which means that when Vanth is in the Mos Pelgo cantina, he’s a newcomer- free for a time between a few days and a week.

When the mining collective shows up, while the subtitles call it Mining Collective, proper noun- it seems more reasonable to believe that Vanth meant it as a common noun (the subtitles have other inaccuracies, like calling Basic English). What he’s talking about is the half criminal organization-half mining company known as the Red Key Company. It just seems kind of ridiculous that he fights and drives off two separate mining companies, even with their thugs wearing blue masks.

As for when he gets Boba Fett’s armor from the Jawas- what we see is a simplification- reflecting how Vanth simplified the story to “I fled Mos Pelgo, was found by a sandcrawler, and paid for this armor using silicax crystals”.

We can probably assume that the rescued by a sandcrawler and paying with silicax crystals stuff is the same, just that there are more steps involved. Specifically- the plot of the first interlude.

In this, Adwin Charu, a representative of the Red Key Company is trying to buy useful things off some Jawas. Vanth encounters him outside of the sandcrawler, but we can assume that he slipped out of the sandcrawler and then looped back around so Adwin saw him as not with the Jawas. And he purchased a cool long coat:

“You’re not from around here, are you?” the man says, still grinning like he knows something. He steps in out of the bright desert sun, brushes some dust off his long jacket. “Not a local.”

He then targets Adwin, knowing that he’s a representative of the Red Key Company from what he said to the Jawas earlier. Vanth offers to vouch for Adwin, to bring his guard down. Now Cobb does say this:

The man steps forward, scratching at his stubbled face. He starts talking to the Jawas. They gabble at him in their rat-tongue and he says, “Uh-huh, no, I know, but I come bearing credits and so does he.” Cobb turns to Adwin and gives a wink. The Jawas whisper and babble. “Okay, then.

The best assumption to make here is that, intending to leave the sandcrawler soon, Vanth just converted his silicax crystals into credits. Jawas have to have a cash supply, that’s presumably what they accepted from Uncle Owen for R2 and C3PO.

In the narrative I’ve built, Vanth wasn’t sure about coming back to protect Mos Pelgo, which is why he didn’t trade for the armor right away. It wasn’t his home, he’d just came into town. So when he shoots Adwin and declares himself a lawman, he really is self appointed. It was a duty he took on in that moment.

So he returns to Mos Pelgo, and in the first skirmish against the Red Key raiders, does what we see in the show. But the war has only just begun.

II. Freetown

The second interlude is from the point of view of a depressed and purposeless Malakili (the Rancor tamer from ROTJ). He is saved from the Red Key Raiders by Cobb Vanth and a Twi’lek woman named Issa-Or. But Mos Pelgo isn’t Mos Pelgo anymore- it’s Freetown- a place for anyone willing to stand up to the syndicates and make a life as free beings. 

Vanth recruits Malakili to “train” a baby Hutt the Raiders were trying to put on Jabba’s dais. Malakili points out that you don’t train Hutts, they’re sapient. You raise them. This shows two traits of Vanth that are on better display in the show- that he has trouble thinking outside of traditional power structures (like not having Tatioone ruled by a Hutt) and trouble interacting with sapient who exist outside of the standard humanoid interaction schema- be they be the oppressor Hutts or the oppressed Tuskens.

Eventually, they fight off the Red Key Raiders, but we know Freetown doesn’t last. And I think why is indicated in a few throwaway lines:

“Everybody’s someone, my friend. Thing about Freetown is, to live inside our walls means to be useful. Are you useful?”

-Aftermath: Life Debt

Then comes a sound—a terrible howl followed by a mad battle cry. Red Key raiders begin falling from the walls as blasts from outside take them out. 

-Aftermath: Empire’s End

Freetown has walls. But Mos Pelgo, as we see it, doesn’t. Given that the walls of Mos Eisley provided Peli with a feeling of protection, I think we can assume that they have some underground component (like vibrating spikes) that protects walled villages from Krayt Dragon attacks. But those would interfere with mining, so there’s an unwalled suburb of Mos Pelgo. And that’s the only part that survived.

Survived? Well what happened to the great experiment of Freetown?

Lorgan tries to crab-walk backward, but Vanth presses down on his wrist hard enough to hear the bones start to grind. He cries out. “You don’t know what you’re doing, Vanth. You’re an idiot playing a game against gods. You stole that suit thinking you can fill it, you stole a Hutt thinking you can raise it to the dais—you’ll never succeed here. My masters will come. They’ll kill you. They’ll wipe this place off the map.”

Lorgan Movellan, the leader of the Red Key Raiders on Tatioone’s, last words are that his masters will come and destroy Freetown for their rebellion. And that’s what I assume happened. Or the Hutts got their stuff together when it came to Jabba’s succession and agreed that whoever it was, it wasn’t one raised by some humans. So the bandits Peli said destroyed Mos Pelgo were either Hutt or Red Key ships that wiped Freetown of the map- presumably also killing Malakili and Issa-Or, as they’re nowhere to be seen. 

The small group of survivors living in the suburbs are defended by a demoralized Cobb Vanth. The name “Freetown” falls away, as does the term sheriff for some reason- becoming instead marshal.

III. The Tuskens

But what about the peace Vanth made with the local Tuskens, who helped him drive away the Red Key Raiders? How does a man go from allying with the Tuskens to saying “These monsters can’t be reasoned with” in four years. Well there are a few possibilities- all of which but the Tuskens in the right and make Vanth’s hatred of them a misunderstanding- all in line with the theme of the episode. And whatever it was, Din talked with the Tuskens and sorted everything out, so Vanth could once again trust them.

But what was the context of this treaty. The deal was, that in exchange for some water tributes, the Tuskens would allow Freetown to live on their sacred land. And then Malakili got his hands on a Krayt Dragon pearl (just like they get in the episode), which secured their protection of Freetown.

As for how all of this was communicated, my best guess for the translator was that it was Malakili. He strikes me as the kind of person who’d learn their sign language so he could learn all the Tuskens did about Banthas and Massiffs so he could perfect his craft.

But Malakili died in the attack that destroyed Freetown, so there is no way to parley with the Tuskens before Din comes to Mos Pelgo. So what are the possibilities of what could have caused this breakdown of the peace.

1. A time limit: This is the one I think is the least likely, because even if Malakili wasn’t a trained interpreter, I don’t think he’d miss something as important as this. And if the treaty just expired, Vanth wouldn’t have felt betrayed. But there might have been something related. For example, without Malakili they couldn’t adjust their water tribute to reflect their smaller population. Still, in this case, I still don’t think Vanth would feel so betrayed as to change his entire beliefs about Tuskens.

2. It’s just a different group: Tuskens organize themselves into clans. Their nomadic lifestlye could create a cycle where different clans end up living in different areas over a few years. This group had no treaty with Freetown. But Vanth saw all Tuskens as a monolith, so when the new group treated Mos Pelgo the way they’d always do, Vanth fought back- restarting the cycle of violence.

3. Someone in Mos Pelgo broke the treaty: In this scenario, a citizen of Mos Pelgo couldn’t handle the water tributes- perhaps because their smaller population made it a greater burden and it couldn’t be renegotiated- and so stole water from the Tuskens, destroying the treaty. But Vanth never found out about this, and blamed the Tuskens instead.

When the Aftermath trilogy finished, Freetown seemed like a new future for Tatioone- full of free people at peace with the Tuskens. But it seems like that’s not how things progressed. Still, with Din’s help, at least the revolutionary peace between Mos Pelgo and the Tuskens has been reestablished. 

[weeklyfangirl]

Frat Boy Pt. 19

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7 (1), part 7 (2), part 8, part 9, part 10, part 11, part 12, part 13 , part 14, part 15, part 16, part 17, part 18

You’re a gal on a mission in this one. And you’re determined to get answers one way or another ;) Share this with a friend and drag them them along for a roller coaster ride too! xx 

“This is a bad idea,” Renny muttered. We were parked a street away from the frat house, waiting for the boy who’d been ignoring me the past week to appear and get in his car. Granted, I’d only reached out once, but still. He’d never replied. Never reached out. It was the radio silence that scared me more than any gang tags. Ignorance might be bliss, but conscious ignorance was hell.

 After our dinner, I’d woken up to my car in the driveway. The windshield clean. Spotless, even. He must’ve hardly gotten sleep. 

 “Why is this necessary again? Do you think he’s cheating on you?” Renny asked. 

 I shook my head too quickly at the word cheating, because even if he was seeing somebody else it wouldn’t technically be cheating. We’d never even defined this. The only thing I hated more than knowing I was in the dark were gray zones. I shook my head too soon, though. What else could I tell her? I couldn’t exactly tell her the truth - that I think I’m being targeted as a cause of Harry’s random association with a gang and that we need to follow him to confirm my crazy conspiracies so I can affirm that one, I am not crazy, and two, I can reach a decision about whether I should talk to the cops. 

 That was too complicated.

 “Actually, you’re right. I think he’s seeing someone else.” I let the lie slip from my lips.

 “Shit. You think he’s seeing Viv?” 

 I wanted to smile at the edge in her voice. The first evidence she didn’t really like the girl either. “He already told me they slept together,” I said casually, as though I’d mentioned I ate Cheerios for breakfast again.

 Renny almost spat. “Ew!! Seriously? I mean, I guess we kind of already thought that. But still…-” she shivered “-GROSS.” 

 “Yeah. Gross,” I agreed. Something stirred next to the bins, and I clutched her arm. But it wasn’t Harry. The random associate walked on, blissfully unaware of the two girls watching his every move and so completely disappointed by his presence. We both sighed. 

 “Wait, he’s behind him!” Renny screeched. 

 Sure enough, Harry emerged, trailing behind the associate. His hair looked damp. He’d probably showered after practice, then. They did some sort of weird bro handshake and parted ways. 

 A beep of an alarm and Harry slid into his Maserati. Let the chase begin.

 “Still can’t believe he drives that thing to school,” Renny muttered. “I mean I would if I had one, too, but … cheating prick.” 

 I had to hand it to Renny. Even if someone was the most likeable person in the world, if they’d done something to cross her friends, she’d find a way to make them the most detestable. At least in her eyes. 

 We waited as he revved the engine and pulled out. He drove fast, but thankfully Renny’s VW could keep up. Grandpa would’ve been a different story. 

 “Where the hell are we going?” 

 “I don’t know.” I fought the urge to add ‘that’s the problem.’

 We travelled towards the coast before he senselessly veered inland again, ending up somewhere I’d never been before. We trailed him slowly, past locked up storefronts, and tagged alleyways, until he turned into a gritty-looking neighborhood. We slowed around the corner, making sure to keep several streets between us. 

 Around the bend, Harry suddenly slammed on his brakes. Renny lurched forward. 

 “What the fuck-” Renny ducked lower in her seat. “Do you think he saw us?”

 In the split two seconds I had, I wagered our chances of reversing and getting through this unseen. But my split two seconds were up, and I hadn’t moved. 

 The motor ran as he got out of the car, calmly, not bothering to shut the door. He’d known. He’d known all along. Time slowed when he faced us, arms crossed, squinting as his judgement penetrated through his Ray Bans all the way through the windshield. He stalked towards our car. No one was around in the rundown neighborhood street to yell at us to get our cars moving. No one could save me from this eternal embarrassment slowly mounting with each step of his black Chelsea boots. 

 The gig was up. 

 I rolled down my window when he tapped on the glass.

 “Go home,” he ordered. 

 I scoffed. “Really? You haven’t talked to me all week and those are the first words you’re going to say to me?” 

 He stepped backwards, acknowledging nothing. “Go. Home,” pointing the direction whence we came. 

 “We weren’t even following you. We were already in the neighborhood asshole!” Renny yelled. 

 I couldn’t have it end like this. I couldn’t have another week of silence, of questions unanswered. The plan was to follow him and see where he ran off to, not utterly expose my desperation. But now that plan was obliterated. Was this it? Was this seriously how he wanted to end things so… pointlessly?

 I opened the car door, running after his sulking frame. The second I placed a hand on his shoulder blade, he whipped around. I cowered. 

 He hadn’t needed to bare his teeth or shout at me to be intimidating. This oppressive darkness rolled off of him in waves, knocking me down repeatedly just when I saw the shore. Like a tired sailor, I’d return to the ocean, knowing the damage it could cause, but knowing it was worth it. It would be worth it… if I could only see beneath the surface. 

 He flinched as I pulled the shades off, but he didn’t look at me. My hand went along his jaw, against the slight stubble that’d made its way through. He relented.

 His pupils were blasted, almost shadowing the outer ring of green. 

 “I changed because of you,” I breathed. Something flashed in his eyes. Something beneath the darkened surface. “I’m not the same as I was before. And I don’t know even know how to… express it. I don’t even know if that’s a good thing,” I admitted. He opened his mouth, but I raised a hand. “I need to know what you’re not telling me. The old me could’ve gone without it, but who I am now? I can’t.” 

 But it was like he only heard half of what I’d said. “I never asked you to be in my life, Y/N.”

 “No, that’s right. You just swindled me into it by pretending to be dumb. You’re a little too good of an actor.”  

 It was his turn to scoff. “No one’s making you run after me.” 

 “No one’s making you be a complete and utter asshole right now, either. Besides yourself. Can you just-” I pushed his chest- “PLEASE. I’m clearly tired of getting nowhere.” 

 Harry looked at his watch, and his jaw clicked. “You know for someone so concerned with their life, you certainly don’t seem to have much of one.” His eyes bore into mine. 

 I swallowed, hard, unmoving though it stung. “I know Viv’s in on it.” 

 It was a stab in the dark, but it worked. He nearly growled.

 I heard Renny open her door behind me.

 “She’s involved in a lot of parts of my life, Y/N. But at least she doesn’t ask too many questions. And she sure as shit doesn’t overstep,” he growled. 

 “We both know I’m not Viv.” 

 “Yeah,” he chuckled. “You’re right…” His eyes levelled with mine. At least she actually fucks me.” 

 I felt like he should’ve stayed, watch the awful betrayal fill my eyes. But he walked away as the air was ripped from my lungs. I wanted to scream, I wanted to run up to him, push him to the ground and tell him-! 

 ...tell him what? 

 It was true. 

 He paused at the car door, not even trying to face me. “Get yourself home.” 

 I didn’t see him drive away. I just heard the slam of the car door as he left me, halfway up the hill. 

 Renny pulled the car up next to me, and I suddenly felt dirty. Like I needed a shower. A very hot, scalding shower, that would burn every inch of him off my body forever. 

 “What’s the plan?” she asked.  

 Clearly, our plan to trail the subject in very deep question had turned out very deeply miserable. 

 In a close encounter, the sailor realizes fairly quickly that the ocean holds all the power to kill them. But the second they acknowledge that, they don’t abandon what they’re looking for. 

 “Can you drop me off at a friend’s?” I asked.

 They just get a bigger ship. 

 -----------

 The just-built senior apartments were the envy of everyone on campus. Modern architecture and sleek interior made it THE choicest option for the upperclassmen - especially the athletes. It was the next best thing for those not living in fraternities or sororities.

 It was also the most expensive on-campus housing available. You could live there if you were rich enough, but more importantly, if you were lucky enough. There was one other way you could live here, though. Chapman held a raffle to “make our housing opportunity equal for everyone.” Which, was bullshit, considering the apartment only reserved four out of sixty rooms for those “raffle winners.” Four raffle winners, out of four THOUSAND upperclassmen.  

 Felix and Zayn had some pretty insane luck. 

 I knocked on their door, antsy as I thought of their probable reaction: “Why is Y/N standing beyond our door on a Thursday night without Renny?” She was my strongest link to them. I’d begged her to come up with me, but she wasn’t budging. Though she wouldn’t admit it, she was a little annoyed at spending the whole day only to have found no other woman and to have been told off by Harry - who she now deems worse than Lying Panty Tossing Baby. 

 A tall athletic-built woman eyed me as she carried their trash down the hall. 

 Felix opened the door. 

 “Oh, hey.” It was the awkward I remember you but we aren’t friends dance. “S’been a while. Come in.” 

 I noticed he was at least 6’ 2” as I moved past him into the foyer where Zayn and Andre paused the video game. They had a whole tech center set up around the T.V. and dull EDC music came from their speaker system. 

 Andre waved and Zayn’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Hey! What’re you doing here?” He moved a pizza box out of his way to head to the open kitchen. Before I could answer, he returned with a cracked beer, handing it to me. 

 “Thanks,” I said, taking a sip out of politeness. Old Da Vinci maps hung on their walls along with tasteful sketches of nude women, and a framed vintage Star Wars poster was in the hallway. 

 “Where’s Renny?” Felix asked, arms crossed as he sat on the arm of the couch. He’d meant it to be casual, but it wasn’t quite casual enough.

 I didn’t want to be the one to break his heart and tell him about Niall if he didn’t already know. And something told me Renny wasn’t cruel enough to rub it in his face. “Uh, not sure. She had to buzz off somewhere though.” To Niall’s bed. I looked between the three of them. “All of you got so. Lucky. With this place. I almost didn’t believe it when Renny told me.” 

 “Not me!” Andre lifted his beer and dramatically pounded it, slamming it down on the table next to the other four beers.

 “Woah-ugh! Pa! That’s mahogany!” Felix spluttered. 

 “You found it at a garage sale!” 

 “It’s still mahogany!” he squeaked. His gangly arms flailed before adjusting his collar. “Either I’m never donating furniture to this apartment again - or you’re not allowed back in this apartment again. Or both.”

 Andre didn’t answer, just fell flat on the couch. Something was off with him. The energy shifted in the room as the guys eyed Andre. I’d clearly come at a wrong time. 

 “I can swing by later, I know you guys were in the middle of a... game…” 

  Zayn swatted his hand. “No, you’re fine. He’s just…” 

 Andre perked up, awaiting Zayn’s next words. 

 “You want to tell her?” Zayn finished. 

 Andre let out an awkward moan. “You know how date night is coming up?”

 My brows stitched. 

 “No??” He cleared his throat, surprised he had to explain. “So Sig Chi’s date night is coming up and basically we just bring a date, and… party. There’s a theme and everything. You really haven’t heard about this?”

 I shook my head.

 “Huh. It’s kind of a big deal that’s why I’m kind of... huh.”  

 “When is it?” I asked.

 “Tomorrow.” 

 “Tomorrow?!” I paused, thoroughly confused. Had Niall told Renny about this? And if it was Sigma Chi then… Harry must already have a date. For tomorrow. My blood boiled thinking that could be part of the reason why he’d dropped off the face of the Earth this week. So he wouldn’t have to take me as his date. 

 “Mine cancelled on me,” Andre said, running a hand over defined black coils. 

 “Dude, for the hundredth time, it’s not that big of a deal.” 

 “You’re not the one in a frat, Felix!” He laughed humorlessly before landing in a pile on the couch again. In a rare moment, I laughed with him. It was slightly ridiculous how important parties were.

 “Oh-kay,” Felix muttered. His blonde hair flopped on the couch next to Andre. He looked up to me, shrugging. “He’s helpless. Without the distraction of video games. Absolutely helpless.” 

 Zayn gave me a once-over. “You’re in the sorority with Renny, aren’t you?” 

 “Uh, yeah. Kind of. Not officially official yet. Kind of in the process of everything right now. Uh, but” -his eyes narrowed from my rambling- “Yeah. Yeah, I’m in it,” I settled on. 

 Andre came to life again. “Would you go with me?” 

 “Oh! Uh…” 

 “You don’t have to,” Zayn offered. 

 “I can do it. I wasn’t doing anything anyways.” The Netflix I was betraying threw a tantrum in the back of my mind. This weekend I’d been wanting to do nothing but lay low, and preferably, in bed.  

 But if today taught me anything, it’s that my plans clearly never work out too well.

 “Seriously?! It’ll only be a couple hours, I won’t make you stay the whole time. Actually, you can leave whenever you want. Just walk in with me.” 

 “Excuse me?” I asked, half-smiling. 

 “Okay, that sounded bad.” He let out a breathless laugh. “What I meant to say was, thank you. You’ll have a great time.” He threw up the finger guns. 

 Zayn nudged my shoulder with his beer. “Want to go on the balcony?” His eyes bore into mine, and I knew that he knew this wasn’t just a friendly visit. A slight chill ran through me at his perception. It was unnerving how he always seemed to… know. But I guess I shouldn’t judge him for having a keen sixth sense. 

 I let him lead me to the sliding glass door.  

 “Oh, the theme’s James Bond, too! So dress like a Bond girl!” Andre called after us. 

 “Like heels?” I asked. But Zayn slid the door shut behind us. It was dark out, but inside I could see Andre give me a thumbs up before resuming the video game with Felix. 

 “Saved his life. Mate wouldn’t stop gabbin’ ‘bout how gutted he was.” Zayn muttered. The flick of a lighter grabbed my attention. The slight orange illuminated dark features and hollowed cheeks as he took a drag. There was no denying he was handsome, especially in this mood lighting. He probably could’ve been recruited for any fraternity off looks alone, but something told me he wouldn’t step near the place. His vibe was too… anti-organization. He blew the smoke over his shoulder. 

 “Very tortured artist of you,” I noted.

 His head tilted at tortured as if throwing the title back to me. “Artist, maybe. Tortured, no.” 

 “What’s a yes for you, then?” 

 “Yes to whateva you’ve been plannin’ on asking me,” he smirked. “Must’ve been important if you didn’t find me in the studio.” 

 I looked down, then out at the city. Thousands of little people scattered everywhere. Students crawling from late-night classes on the fringes of campus looked like ants. I held my thumb up for scale. Verified ants. Maybe smaller. 

 “I came here to find a different perspective.” My hand fell. I faced him square. “Your perspective.” 

 He took another drag, letting the smoke fill the space between us. “On?” 

 I was a little surprised he didn’t know.

 “Harry.”  

 If he didn’t know, he also didn’t seem too surprised. He leaned against the railing, hazel eyes undressing desperate thoughts. “What do you want to know?” he asked, voice barely above a whisper.

 The ash from his cigarette floated down to his feet, but an unseen wind carried it up again, rolling over and down like dirty snowflakes to the street below. 

 “I know he doesn’t like you.” 

 Zayn’s laugh was light, soft, but carried the same fullness as Renny’s. “Perceptive girl, ya? S’not what you want to know though is it.” 

 “Why is he so scared of you?” His brow arched, and I could tell I was losing him. “What do you know?” I clarified. 

 Another drag and his shoulders straightened. “Thought you were flatterin’ me there for a second.” Something glimmered in his eyes, something just beyond the surface, and I looked away before I could see anything more than friendly. “Can I ask you somethin’ in return?” 

 I nodded. 

 “Why do you want to know?” he murmured. 

 “I just want to understand.”

 “Mm,” he hummed, the treble of his voice like slow-spilling silk. “Curiosity killed the cat.” 

 I swallowed a little too loudly, but his words hit a little too closely. 

 “S’all right,” he continued. “S’human nature t’want to understand.” He cocked his head a little. “I actually met Harry before school started during the summer. I was working at Hilltop Resort.”

 “Really?” 

 “I was his server.” He let out a short breath as if he couldn’t believe it happened. “Tipped well, actually.” 

 “I remember you working there!” Faint summer memories of Renny whisking us away for lunch on our treat yourself day came back, stirring faint feelings of happiness. It seemed so long ago. I felt like I’d aged five years in three months. “So let me get this straight. He doesn’t like you because you’re in the service industry?” I spat.

 He winced. “No, s’more like…” He took a breath. “There was a coworker of mine. He wasn’t mean, but he wasn’t exactly nice either. Kept to himself on breaks, never really chatted with any of us except to flirt with the bartender. Anyway, I used to see Harry a lot there, but when Jack got promoted Harry’d only sit in Jack’s section.”

 I crossed my arms, the night time air finally sinking in. 

 “I didn’t think too much of it at first,” he admitted. The cigarette moved in his mouth, hand fiddling with the lighter. “But one night I was running out to give a guest the card they’d left behind, but I saw them together instead.” 

 Before I could picture Harry and Zayn’s coworker making out against the wall, he continued - “He was giving Harry stacks of cash.”

 Flashbacks of Viv trying to pass Harry money in the Catalina Island bar played out like a movie in my mind. 

 “What’d you do?” I pressed.

 He shrugged. “I saw Harry slip something else in his pocket. It looked like a little bag. Must’ve been a bonus.” He muttered the last words. 

 “A bonus for what?” 

 “I didn’t know then. I just thought he’d somehow found a way to steal from the manager’s safe and was splitting the profits.”

 “Why give it to Harry though?” 

 “That’s what I couldn’t figure out.” He leaned in. “I saw them together a few more times. The second was an accident. Third, not so much. Harry saw me that time. Then before I left for the night, I searched his locker. Took me a while, but I found some pills. Little bag of coke, too. He came in right when I was putting it back.” 

 “No.” 

 “Yeah. He didn’t say anything. Just stared at me like he was going to kill me. I got my shit and got the hell out of there. Next day, the boss said they received a tip to check my locker and they found the drugs in mine. You know the fucked up bit? I was fired.” 

 “But it wasn’t yours!” 

 “Doesn’t matter. Still found it there.” Zayn stamped out his cigarette, blowing away the last smoke. I guess pity was etched in my face, because he suddenly turned defensive. “Don’t look at me like that. I work at Javier’s now. I’m fine.” 

 Javier’s was the fancy Mexican restaurant overlooking the Pacific. He was doing more than fine.

 “That’s still not fair to you,” I muttered.

 “I didn’t want to be involved, anyway. S’better I left one way or another.” 

 “What was his name again? Your coworker’s?”

 “Jack.” 

 Jack. Why did that sound so familiar? 

 “He’s not sound, you know,” Zayn added. 

 “Well clearly if he gave you murder eyes.” 

 “No, not Jack. Harry. He’s not…”

 “Sound,” I repeated. The word felt heavy on my tongue.

 Zayn nodded, tucking a cigarette behind his ear.

 “I can’t believe Harry got you fired.” 

 “Well, I don’t exactly know. Jack must’ve been the one to move the drugs into my locker.”

 “Yeah, but who told him to?”

 Zayn didn’t answer. The facts had been there this entire time, but I didn’t want to see it. I still didn’t want to see it. But Zayn was here, undeniably linking them together for me. Harry and drugs and money were three things that’d been circulating in the same place much longer than I could know. For some reason beyond me, Harry was a dealer. Or ran as head of them. Which meant his association with the men who’d assaulted me was… what? A business deal gone wrong?

 “England’s a small country, you see the same faces everywhere. Like here, if you’re perceptive enough. And in each, he’s jus’... involved in something bigger, while at the same time trying to hide. S’like he’s a magnet for infamy to his own detriment.” 

 “Are you referring to his adoption?” 

 He twisted the cigarette behind his ear, realizing I didn’t really need an answer to this question and that now I was just testing him for what he knew. “Contrary to what he may believe, I don’t know everything.” 

 But I couldn’t fight the feeling that he was talking about me. Smooth artist’s fingers fiddled with the lighter again, but he didn’t light the second cigarette. He knew more than what he was telling me. 

 But even the new me didn’t want to hear much else tonight.  

 “You don’t want to stay?” he asked.

 I didn’t realize I was walking towards the door ‘til his words stopped me in my tracks. Disappointment tinged his words. I felt a little guilty, heading out the door as soon as I’d gotten what I’d needed. 

 But I was tired. And sadly, unless there was a sketch pad in front of him, I didn’t know what else we could talk about. I didn’t know what else he’d see. 

 I shook my head, and he lit the cigarette, not bothering to walk me out. 

 ------

Racing down the spindly halls, my heart pounded out of my chest. I heard the cries above the whispers of the Watchers, and they grew louder with a sickening urgency. A gutteral wailing meant for me. 

 I looked down the hall, awaiting the dark shadow to appear from the walls, when he’d creep closer, suffocatingly closer. 

 The door wouldn’t open, not past an inch. 

 But he called for me, this time. My name fell from unseen lips.

 “Y/N,” he called. It was hoarse. He was scared. I’d never heard that cry before. This time it wasn’t solid air the door was against - it was pills. Tiny pills, hundreds of them, thousands of them, multiplying on top of each other until they filled what I could see of the room. Until they were spilling out the crack. 

 “Y/N!!!” His voice was panicked, but muffled. It was muffled now. Why wasn’t he opening the door?? Why couldn’t he reach me?? The shadow drew closer. It surrounded me, outside, every inch of the hall covered by darkness. 

 My heartbeat was the only sound. 

 A waterfall of pills. The glint of a knife. 

 I couldn’t reach him in time. 

 I couldn’t save Harry. 

 I couldn’t even save myself.

part 20

[fandom-necromancer]

129. Just talk to me please

Fandom: Detroit become human | Ship: Reed900 (Warnings: blood mentioned)

'Good morning, RK!' 'That is a possibly incorrect statement, Hank. Neither you nor I know how this morning will develop and whether the subjective judgement would conclude it as good.' 'Jeez, Nines can't you just take it? Just for once?' 'No.' Gavin braced himself for the android's arrival. 'Morning, tin-can', he mumbled to avoid listening to the same shit Hank had to put up with. But as always, he just got the silent treatment.

There was no denying the RK900 wasn't good with conversation. No one knew whether it was deliberately or just how the android had been programmed, but whenever he talked to someone it was harsh, degrading and with no account taken for other's feelings. And, well, Gavin could live with that. He rarely cared for such things himself when it meant getting the job done. But no, the stupid thing didn't talk to him. Not at all. In their first few weeks, yes. There had been no difference in his behaviour towards him and the others. But now... Gavin couldn't even find a reason for the sudden change. Yeah, he hadn't played nice, he had taken it for a challenge and had answered with equal disregard to social etiquette. Quite immediately the android had stopped talking. Although Gavin had to admit, their talks had always been a welcome challenge to him. Finally, someone who was willing to address the things as they were. There had been times he had wished for the machine to be more careful, times where what he said really hurt. But he enjoyed their conversations more than not – something that couldn’t be easily said of his other co-workers. Being ignored was somehow worse than anything he had to put up with yet.

‘Hey, uhm…good news: we got our warrant.’ He looked over to his partner, searching for any kind of reaction. As usual: nothing. ‘Err, do you want to go now or d-‘ RK900 was already standing and looking at him expectantly. The subtle hint he was already waiting for a longer time than he would have liked to. Gavin hurried to get up, too, fishing the warrant from his top drawer and power-walked after the android. A few minutes later they sat in the car, Gavin was driving, and the silent robot was next to him motionless. Could as well be in standby or something. ‘So, uhm… How was your weekend?’ God, that was awkward. Couldn’t he have askes something less… trivial? As there was no answer, he quickly tried to cover up what felt like a huge misstep to him. ‘Heh, bet something between around average and mildly pleasing? Yeah, I know, why have I even asked? Mine was good, I guess. Spent a lot of time with my cats. But I guess that doesn’t interest you either…’ He took a short glance into the passenger window, seeing the reflection of the LED turn from yellow to red. Yeah, shit, he better stayed quiet. He didn’t know what he had done to have pissed off the android in mere weeks, but he would have to cut it down if he wanted to come out of this alive. He had seen the things during the revolution. He had seen Nines a few times fighting criminals. The guy was a viscous fighter. And even if Gavin was well trained and capable himself, he knew he wouldn’t be a match for the RK900.

He pulled up in front of the house. ‘Okay, we are there. Should I go? Or do you want to-‘ Nines was already out of the door and Gavin grumbled before he hurried out too: ‘Guess you want to.’ But as he walked to the front porch, Nines stood patiently next to the door. Gavin groaned again and rang the doorbell. ‘Really man, this game you playing? Absolutely no fun. We really have to talk about this. As we started this you quickly became one of the more pleasant partners I had. Might have even said I liked you. But this? I can’t work like this.’ Gavin had talked while they waited, but by now someone would have opened already. ‘Oh, for phck’s sake.’ He rang again and added, this time louder: ‘Detroit police, open up!’

No reaction. Slowly Gavin was fed up being ignored again and again and again. He felt his patience running out and someone would have to pay the price then. He was about to ring again as the damn toaster shoved him to the side unceremoniously. ‘Hey, dipshit, what the hell?’ The android pressed his hand against the lock, skin retracted. Moments later the door swung open. ‘Good to know. I’ll phcking invest in a mechanical one, just you know it!’ Before he could announce to go in there, Nines slipped in in front of him, weapon drawn.

Gavin sighed and followed, announcing their presence: ‘Detroit police, come out, we just want to talk!’ They walked down the hallway. The house was clean and well-kept. No sign of a sudden departure. Maybe their suspect was just at work? Well, either way it would go well. The person they searched for was an elderly man, near retirement and according to medical data not the fittest. Gavin didn’t expect much resistance. He already dropped his weapon. It was evident no one was home, as the man would have at least tried to stop them.

Out of nowhere, Nines spun around and shoved Gavin in the chest hard enough to let him fall backwards to the ground. The moment Gavin wanted to exclaim some profanities the words got stuck in his throat. The gunshot was near simultaneously with Nines’ reaction, Gavin only saw the fracturing hull under the force and the splatter of blue blood. Then a shot from the android’s own weapon and someone falling to the ground behind him. Reflexively Gavin spun around on the ground, throwing himself at the man and grabbing the pistol to avoid more damage. Nines had targeted the man’s leg, rendering him unable to walk. After a bit of a struggle, Gavin had pried the gun out of his fingers and turned him around to handcuff the idiot. Occupied, he just asked into the space in front of him: ‘Are you okay, toaster?’ No answer. Phck this guy’s silence, really! He turned around to make voice of his anger, as he saw the android leaned against a wall, Thirium flowing freely from a wound near the pump. ‘Phck! Nines, you alright? Just… talk to me please! Only this one time!’ The android fixed him with these grey eyes and actually opened his mouth: ‘Your incompetence will get me killed, detective.’ Then the machine shut down.

‘Phck!’ Gavin was caught between their suspect that was bleeding out and his partner that kind of did the same. ‘Phck this!’ He jumped over to Nines, snatched the handcuffs from his belt and used them to chain the suspect to the banister. Then he pulled out his phone while trying to lift the android. ‘Connor! It’s me Gavin. Shut up! I need you here, as soon as possible, best with an ambulance. I handcuffed our suspect to the stairs. I will leave now, your brother got shot. Yeah, I phcking know, Connor! I’ll still get him repaired, phck protocol. He shut down; this can’t be good. No, don’t give me a lecture about emergency stasis. Not. Helping. Now get your ass over here!’

He slammed the red button and pushed the phone back in his pocket. He would need two hands to get the android back into the car. ‘Hang on, Nines. I’ll get you fixed!’

 It was weird sitting in this waiting-room, worrying about a robot getting repaired. Well, honestly, that wasn’t the weird part. Of course, he was worried about his partner. He still liked him, he would worry about any co-worker hurt on the job, even if he wouldn’t show it. No, it was weird sitting here. Amongst all these weird android-lovers. Seeing people worry that much and immediately starting to smile when their toy came back, hugging, sometimes kissing. He felt out of place.

‘God, what takes them so long?’, he muttered to himself, resting his face in his hands. ‘Don’t worry, they do good work. You’ll get them back in no time.’ Gavin looked up into the friendly face of an android, perplex. ‘A friend of yours?’ ‘Partner’, Gavin answered without thinking, not prepared to have a conversation with a stranger. ‘Oh, how lovely! I am happy to see human-android relationships rising!’ ‘No, it’s not-‘ Gavin only now realised not everyone’s first association would be police partners. But the other was already continuing so enthusiastically, Gavin just fell silent and listened. Hell, he couldn’t care less for some stranger’s image of him. ‘I couldn’t do it, to be honest. You humans lack the ability to interface, sorry if I’m so bold. That would be too much of a sacrifice for me, but I knew a few androids who live quite a happy life with their humans.’ ‘Yeah’, Gavin nodded, glancing to the door and hoping more than ever the damn RK900 would finally step out. ‘Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude!’ God, this android was already getting on his nerves. ‘Some of my best friends are humans! You have a few quirks I think are quite interesting! Like eating or sleeping.’ Yeah, quirks. It’s called staying alive, idiot. Come on Nines please, rescue me! He couldn’t start a phcking argument with this toaster here. ‘I guess.’ ‘Okay, sorry, I have to ask but how did you two met?’ The guy had now fully turned towards him and was in full gossip mode. Gavin smiled. Oh, he would simply tell the truth, that would shut him up. ‘Hmm, just work. Well, I kinda tried to kill him’, he grinned what hit the other unprepared. ‘My partner is a RK900 unit, you see? The deviant hunter.’ He smiled as the android recoiled and gaped at him. ‘We met on the job, he tried to kill the friend of a co-worker, you might know him? Connor? A RK800? Anyways, I shot him, Connor deactivated him and made him deviate.’ The android’s eyes widened even more. Gavin knew Connor was quite famous, being the deviant hunter himself before he switched sides. It was a shitty card to play, but the idiot finally shut up for once. ‘He started working at the police force soon afterwards.’ ‘That’s… sweet’, the android answered swallowing and scooted fully back onto his seat.

At the same moment, Nines walked out of the door, the bloodied jacket the only evidence of his previous damage. Gavin was at his feet immediately, happy to be spared to spend another second near the android. ‘Nines! Are you alright?’ ‘I’m working perfectly again. Why is this android staring at me?’ Gavin looked back to the seated guy, who quickly averted his eyes. Nines hadn’t exactly been quiet addressing him. ‘Don’t worry, we had a lovely chat’, Gavin answered with a devilish grin. ‘I see. Your effort to get me repaired are noted’, the tin-can stated, looking at another recently reunited pair, then swiftly pulling Gavin into a hug. It was now the human’s turn to be taken off guard. ‘Hey Nines, did they exchange you for another RK? Something wrong?’ ‘We need to talk.’ ‘Thank phck, because I want to know what I did to deserve the silent treatment!’

They went out, Gavin again following the plastic to the car. It was inside that Nines spoke again: ‘This unit has a defect no one can repair.’ ‘Hs to be serious when you start talking in third person.’ ‘I have been issued without a social program.’ ‘Okay?’ ‘I don’t know how to properly talk to persons. But I realised I often hurt people with my words. I just can’t figure out why.’ ‘Okay, that explains a lot. But why didn’t you speak with me? You spoke with others.’ ‘I don’t care to hurt others. Connor understands, the rest will eventually. But I didn’t want to hurt you. I like you. I was informed friends are important.’ ‘Wow okay, but you not speaking to me hurt more than your words before, if you so will.’ ‘That wasn’t my intention.’ ‘Yeah and now it makes sense. Why didn’t you just tell me before?’ ‘It’s a defect.’ ‘So? You said we are friends. I won’t judge you. I’m pretty bad with people too.’ ‘I know. Your social capabilities are below average.’ ‘Thanks. I guess.’ ‘So you would prefer me hurting you?’ ‘If that means we speak again, yes. I understand why now. So, I don’t really think I would be mad for long. Also, how will you learn, if you don’t try with someone?’

There was silence for a while, then Nines spoke up again: ‘Gavin, I don’t think I will learn much from you.’ ‘True, asshole. But I know how to be nice, I just choose not to, okay? I’m definitely not leading by example, but I could correct you.’ ‘That could help. But I doubt your judgement still.’ ‘Okay, toaster, first of all: Phck you. Second of all: that was rude. See? I can help you!’ ‘We’ll see. I agree to your suggestion.’ ‘You do?’ ‘Of course. We are partners.’

[hopeduckling13]

A Wish Come True: Chapter 12

Summary:  How quickly can your mood change from pure happiness to pure horror? In a millisecond.The day Killian and Emma found out they were true love, they were ecstatic. That is until, they were forced to say goodbye to each other. For forever. Or so they thought.Can they still manage to find their true love for each other after five years of seperation or is it too late?

Fandom: Once Upon A Time

Ship: Captain Swan

Setting: 5 years after 5x20 Firebird

Also on AO3, FF.net and Wattpad

Catch up on Tumblr: [Chapter 1] [Chapter 2] [Chapter 3] [Chapter 4] [Chapter 5] [Chapter 6] [Chapter 7] [Chapter 8] [Chapter 9] [Chapter 10] [Chapter 11]

Reblog to be tagged in future chapters

~~~ EMMA’S POV ~~~

 With Carter gone for quite a while now, I stand up. There’s no way he’s still hanging out on my porch, right? That’d be far too desperate. So, I doubt he’s still here. I should be safe.

He won’t get in my way now when I leave to go to my true love. I get my red leather jacket and I slip it on. Then I walk out of my house. The house that Killian and I will finally get to live in together. Now it’ll finally feel like a home to me.

Our future begins now and even though I expected that thought to freak me out once again, it really doesn’t. I’m ready this time. I don’t have any doubts.

Having lived without Killian for all these years, I noticed how much I never want to lose him again. I suppose that saying about only knowing what you have when it’s gone is true after all.

I get into my bug and start it. It’ll take me to Killian quicker than my feet ever would.

That’s exactly what I need right now. I need to see my pirate soon. It’s been too long. I don’t want to waste any more time.

Luckily as the Sheriff, I can drive as fast as I want without getting a speeding ticket for it.

 ***

 I make it to the docks in record time.

I get out of my bug and literally run towards the Jolly Rodger.

Killian is waiting for me on deck. He’s standing at the railing and he’s looking out at the horizon – lost in his own thoughts. Why does he seem so sad and defeated? He’s back for good, right? And not just for a few more minutes?

I walk up to him. He doesn’t seem to notice though. That’s weird. Usually, you have to step on his ship with only one toe and he’ll know instantly. That man’s instincts are insane. Must be the pirate in him.

I sneak up on him and hug him tightly from behind. I press a quick kiss to his cheek. He quickly turns his head to look at me. Then he turns me in his arms and gives me a proper hug.

As I place my head on his chest, I hear his heartbeat. It still feels too good to be true. Killian is back and he’s alive again. At that thought, tears begin to stream down my face for the second time today. Well, it’s the second time I cry out of happiness.

Killian pulls away a little then and puts his hand on my cheek, wiping away my tears with his thumb. “Is everything alright, Swan?”

I look up at him with the biggest smile possible and nod enthusiastically. “Everything is perfect.” I press three kisses to his cheek, which causes him to giggle adorably. “How are you here?” I say. My voice sort of breaking from the crying, even though I’m not sobbing or anything. I’m not sad after all. Not at all.

The loss of Carter isn’t really something, that has the ability to hurt me. He’s not Killian. Losing him won’t bring me down as it did with my true love.

“I’m honestly not sur-“ He starts to say, but I cut him off by putting my finger onto his lips.

I realized, that on second thought I don’t really care about any of this. Not right now.

We can talk later. For now, we’ve got to make up for lost time.

I stand on my tiptoes and pull Killian’s head down to me. I crash my lips onto his in a passionate kiss. He puts his hand and hook on my waist and pulls me close to him. And then we get lost in each other as if we were never separated to begin with.

I missed his lips on mine. They still feel exactly the same – incredibly soft and somehow meaningful. He’s a great kisser. I haven’t been kissed like this for five years now and I missed it so damn much.

He walks us backwards a little, trapping me between his body and the railing. He moves his lips from my lips to my cheek and then down my throat.

“I missed you so much.” I sigh. The tears back once again.

Killian pulls away and looks at me with so much love, that I think my heart might burst any second. I peck his lips once more.

“I love you, Killian Jones, and I’m never letting you go again. I’m afraid you’re stuck with me.” I say with the biggest smile on my face.

Killian grins at me and moves his hand from my waist to my hand, interlacing our fingers and lifting them up to kiss my hand softly. “I love you, too. Don’t worry, Swan, I’m not going anywhere.” He freezes at that. He takes a deep breath, and something is definitely on his mind. His expression saddens and he looks towards the floor, refusing to meet my gaze. “Unless you want me to leave.”

Wait, what? Why would I want him to leave? I just got him back. This is not what I want in the least. Not now and not ever.

“Hey…” I say softly, putting my other hand on his chin and lifting it up. Our gazes lock and I have to concentrate hard, so I don’t get lost in his eyes. Those I missed almost as much as I missed him. “I don’t ever want you to leave. Why would you think that?”

“Because of that guy…your boyfriend.” He almost chokes on the word boyfriend. There are actually tears forming in his eyes.

Oh, shit.

I never wanted to hurt him. But I can see how much pain the whole situation causes him. This pain he feels right now is all my fault.

I never should’ve dated anyone. Why the hell does my mom have to be so annoying?

Now my true love thinks, that I moved on from him, while he was gone. He thinks, that I’m in love with someone else. I really, really hate this.

I take his face into my hands and kiss both of his eyelids.

“He’s not my boyfriend. Not anymore.” I say through my own tears. It kills me to see Killian hurt. Especially knowing that it’s all my fault. If he was this sad because of someone else, they’d be dead by now. I wouldn’t show them any mercy.

“That’s exactly the point, Swan. You were happy with this guy and me being here ruined that for you. I caused your heart to break, even though I always thought it was my job to protect your heart. But I failed.” He says with a mix of sadness and a bit of anger.

“Killian, you didn’t break my heart. You fixed it. I was never happier than I am today.” I kiss him softly, but he isn’t reacting. I hug him tightly, before looking deeply into his eyes once more. “I was never in love with Carter, okay? My mother was just so infuriating with trying to get me to date again, so I sort of dated him to keep her at bay.”

Killian still seems hesitant to forgive himself, I suppose. He hasn’t even done anything wrong. I’m the one he should be mad at.

“I only love you. I thought about you every day we were separated and wished, that I could just see you once more. I would’ve done anything to get you back, even if it was just for a second. I wasn’t able to move on from us. I never wanted to because I could never love anyone as much as I love you. For the most part, I believe, that when you died, so did the piece of my heart, that is capable of loving people. I just wasn’t the same person without you in my life. I feel like the best version of my life will be with you – our future together. You’re the person I truly love and no one else can compare to you.”

Killian’s expression softens over the course of my little speech. His eyes light up again and a smile slowly creeps upon his lips.

“I’m sorry, my love.” He says.

“No need. You and I both know, that I would’ve reacted exactly the same. Maybe even worse than you.”

We smile at each other and he pulls me back into his embrace, locking our lips in the process.

[artistlove17]

Losing my Nana

3 March 2019.

This was the day I lost one of, if not THE most important person in my life.

A little backstory: 👇

I had been living with my fiance in a rental trailer. Our landlord had admitted that he had been going into our house when we weren't home, which freaked us out because that is an insane invasion of privacy, not to mention it really creeped me out because there have been several "incidents" at that house and due to work shifts there were days that I was home alone... So we really wanted to move. Before this my fiance had lost his job and then after that I ended up losing mine. So we knew we WANTED to leave... and then we HAD to leave anyway because we couldn't pay rent anymore.

My Nana has always been my biggest supporter and has always made sure I knew that she loved me (she would tell me 200 times a day) and would always let me know she was there for me and that she understood. We had a really deep conversation about life and things before she died. She took care of me when I had the chicken pox at 19 years old. She was the first person I ever smoked weed with. She actually gave up doing any kinds of pills so she could be around me.

She asked us to live with her. She had been asking for a while, and now my fiance and I had nowhere else to go so she was super excited about us moving in with her finally.

I was kind of happy about it too because she didnt live in the best neighborhood and I liked that I would be there to make sure she was ok and I could do things for her (like cook for her and take her to her appointments and things like that).

At this point we had just started moving into the room that previously belonged to my meth head cousin. Yea... it's as bad as it sounds. He had been in and out of prison for many MANY drug, weapon, and theft charges. He would break into houses (including my dads house when I lived there) and steal all kinds of collectables and valuables and then go pawn them for meth money.

My Nana hated him. She was constantly kicking him out. But... she had a really big heart and if you apologized enough then she'd forgive you. So my other cousin Candy (the meth heads mom and my Nana's Niece) was constantly abusing this fact. She knew my Nana was a pushover. But there were times Nana told her no as well and then Candy resorted to threatening.

She'd tell Nana that she would "cut her off" which meant Nana would have no one to take her to her doctors appointments or to the store or things like that. Nana didnt drive or have a car, so she relied on Candy for these things. Nana had actually been asking my Uncle to buy her a car so she wouldn't have to deal with Candy anymore... but Candy was always pretending to be Nana's best friend and spent time with Nana when it was convenient for her. (One of Nanas sons had a lot of medical issues, the other lived 13 hours away, and my dad was just an asshole. So my nana relied on rides from Candy almost every day.)

The last time that Nana kicked out my meth head cousin he had hit her (which I didn't know about until after he landed in prison once again... otherwise he'd be dead and I'd be in prison). But Candy brought him back over there while Nana was gone and made him take a shower and get comfortable and everything... and then when Nana raised hell about him being there and told Candy that he had hit her... Candy literally threatened my Nana and told her "Well you better not ever hit him back! I'll be done with you if you do! Touch him and see if I ever help you again..." She literally didn't give a shit that her meth head son had hit my Nana... the woman that she "claimed" was her best friend and she cared sooo much about.

She didn't give a fuck about my Nana... she was just using her and I realize that now.

Candy also got my Nana started on drinking. Candy has been a drunk for as long as I can remember and a lot of my family have told me she used to be on meth and cocaine and has probably tried just about every drug. In the end she just turned to alcohol because it was legal and she thinks no one can say anything about her drinking since it's legal.

She was constantly trying to get my Nana to drink, despite knowing Nana had an addiction problem in the past and Nana telling her she didn't want to drink because she knew she shouldn't. For a year I watched her slowly water Nana down to it... for a year Nana kept saying no and then on a bad day Candy made her a mix drink and she finally accepted it.

This started Candy constantly buying Nana bottled and jugs of Jim Beam whiskey and me watching Candy come over already buzzed in the mornings and making mixed drinks for herself and Nana.

Should also mention that Candy has a really rich husband. He owns a huge shipping corporation in my town and would give Candy anything she asked for. He bought her 2 cars (a brand new Mercedes convertible and a Jeep Wrangler), a nice house that he let her remodel, and a huge swimming pool and hot tub. He takes her on trips wherever she wants to go... but they CONSTANTLY argue and fight because Candy won't let her sons deal with their own shit. Both of them are thieving meth heads who are in prison and she bends over backwards trying to get them out and works just so she can send them money in prison. She has bailed the younger one out more times than I could tell you... he has a whole list of charges and arrests. But she keeps acting like he's done nothing wrong and gives him whatever he asks for. This is something I had a problem with long before any of what I'm about to tell you happened.

(There are also accusations that Candy stole from her husband and gave the money to her sons after she bailed them out once. And she has made jokes herself about how he wouldn't even notice anything was missing and made jokes about how much money she could get if she divorced him. Which her stupid self doesn't realize wouldn't be that much, maybe her 2 cars, because everything else was his inheritance from his dad who originally built the company and she legally isn't allowed to touch his inheritance.)

-

My fiance and I had moved our bed and some of our stuff to my Nana's and spent one night there. It was peaceful and comforting. That night Nana came in our room and joked about how we needed to put our big TV in the living room for her to watch. (We had plans to buy her one at Christmas).

The next day we got up and went and got donuts from my favorite place down the road. After we ate my fiance and I fell asleep watching a movie. At this point we didnt even know my Nana was in the house... we hadn't seen or heard from her since we had been up and assumed she had gone somewhere with Candy like usual. (Turns out Nana had already started to cut Candy off and had called and told her not to come that day, telling her she was just going to rest.)

My Great Aunt Pat had been staying in the living room for a couple of nights because she had been staying with Nana. Nana hated being alone in her apartment, which is why Pat was staying there with her until we got moved in.

My fiance and I got woken up just as it was getting dark out by my Aunt knocking on the door. She came in and said she was worried about Nana because Nana told her she was just going to rest today and had went to her room to lay down. Pat was worried though because that had been 3-4 hours ago and she hadn't seen Nana since.

This is when I knew. And you might find that crazy because how could you know?

Nana never slept that long. She slept that long at MOST on a really GOOD night. Otherwise she would sleep an hour, maybe 2 and then at least get up to go to the bathroom or turn on a movie if she couldn't go back to sleep. 9 times out of 10 she would be awake through any hour of the night that I got up to go to the bathroom. We both had terrible sleeping habits and would often be in the kitchen at 3 am making breakfast...

So when Aunt Pat said she hadn't seen or heard from her in that long... I knew something wasn't right...

I sat on the bed for a second and just leaned back against the headboard while my Aunt walked back to the living room... I think she knew what I did but she didn't want to be the one to... find her.

I didn't want to get off that bed... but my fiance (who didn't realize what my Aunt and I did) said "You should go check on her. I would but she's probably in a nightgown and that might be kind of weird."

So I took a deep breath and went to her door.

- (Warning: GRAPHIC)

I opened the door slowly and the bed was empty... and I felt my heart stop.

In the floor I could see her hair fanned out around the foot board of the bed.

I walked over... not knowing what to expect, but just hoping like hell that maybe she just passed out...

Her lips were blue... but I didn't let that stop me from shaking her and calling to her and begging her to wake up. Her skin was cold and her body was stiff and ungiving, nothing like the warmth and love that I always felt from her.

-

I fell back on my ass and leaned against the dresser... so in shock that the tears hadn't even come yet. I couldn't breath. My chest felt like it was tight and my lungs wouldn't work anymore.

But I finally made myself get up and I called for my Great Aunt and fiance to call 911. My fiance called them and I heard him in her room telling the operator that he was trained in CPR but there was no point. She was gone. She had been gone for too long.

The first tear didnt roll down my cheek until I heard my Aunt screaming at Nana's body and crying for her to wake up. That's when I realized she was actually gone... it wasn't just a bad dream.

I got up to ask my fiance to call my mom and family and broke down in the hall while he stepped outside to do that. They wouldn't have been able to hear him over my Aunts painful sobbing. I sat in the hallway floor, staring at the 30+ pictures she had hung up all through the hallway...most of them were me. Her one and only grandchild. I remember crying silently and thinking "this can't be happening."

My fiance came back in after calling my mom and he took me to the living room and made me sit in my Nana's recliner. She had broken it a while back when my uncle came to visit and he sat in her lap and it flipped over with them in it. Nana had told me the story so many times, she didn't care about the chair being broken, she just thought it was a funny memory.

Minutes later... I don't really know how long because it was like my brain stopped perceiving time... the paramedics and the coroner came in. They asked us some questions after they examined her and the coroner pronounced her dead. I can't even remember what he asked other than about her medication and him telling us that she had been gone a while and there was nothing any of us could have done.

After this my mom came in and I called my Uncle and tried to tell him what had happened but couldn't get the words out so I handed the phone to my fiance who stepped outside and came back in later to tell me my Uncle had booked a flight and would be here in the morning.

After that more of my family showed up, my other Uncle and Great Aunt and then I called my Dad... who I didn't think was going to come for a second...

And finally everyone was there and everyone was crying and confused and asking what happened. And then Candy came in.

She ran straight to me and started screaming and bawling "Is Aunty dead!? She can't be dead! This isn't real!" And fell back in Nana's recliner and started kicking and screaming and crying like a 5 year old throwing a fit.

Now I know everyone reacts to things differently and grieves differently... but you could smell the alcohol on her and could tell she was out of her mind. And here she was throwing a fit and showing her ass while the rest of the family cried and talked amongst each other. I didn't really think about it or say anything at the time because I was so out of it, but my fiance brought it up later how just batshit crazy she seemed and how stupid she made herself look.

-

It was at this point that the coroner had us all in the kitchen and told us she had been gone for a while and that he believed she fell after she got up and the way she hit her head on the brick wall instantly killed her. He said she was gone before she hit the floor.

So she had gotten up, probably to go to the bathroom or something like usual... and just lost her balance, cracked her head on the wall... and was gone before she hit the ground.

-

After giving birth at 15 to my dad, and then having my younger uncle by surprise in her 30s. After fighting ulcers and stomach cancer and 2 knee replacements. After defeating her drug abuse problems... that's how she goes. Something so fucking simple!? Something that could happen so... easily...

Candy proceeded to tell the coroner that Nana had been put back on Neurontin at her last doctor visit. Candy and Mom both said the last time she was on that shit she had loss of speech and balance. Mom said she had been on it before and knew that it could mess with people really bad sometimes and that Nana had told her before about how bad it was last time they put her on it.

It's crazy how quickly drama ensued after that...

Our crazy landlord called my fiance and told him we needed to get our cats and the rest of our stuff out of "his house." Even though it had only been 2 days since we notified him that we were leaving. He threatened to throw our cats out to the neighbors dogs if we didn't have them out by morning because "his house wasn't a kennel." And that statement is what pissed me off the most because we hadn't even moved half of our stuff out of that house yet and here he was threatening us to pretty much move out over night, even though he legally had to give us 60 days.

So we had to go out there with my mom and dad and pack all of our stuff into their vehicles and move everything THAT NIGHT. We literally left to do that as the funeral home pulled up to get my Nana's body out of the house...

And my psychotic ass cousin decided for some reason that SHE should be the one to take Nana's purse. Candy literally grabbed Nana's purse and went and put it in her car before anyone even noticed and then told everyone that she had a key to the apartment and not to worry about it. (At this point I should mention that Candys meth head sons stuff was still in Nana's apartment, we had just started moving it the night before. Even though he had been in prison for several weeks at this point.)

The next day I got called to the funeral home with my dad and Uncles. They made the funeral arrangements with my input and said that everything should be left to me because I was the only grandkid and was so close to Nana.

The funeral was set to the next day, March 5, because one of my Uncles had to have surgery on the 7th and wanted to have it before then.

I held it together at the funeral pretty well, I only started crying when they played the song she used to sing to me all the time. I had smoked a blunt before going in Nana's honor and to make it a bit easier for me... Nana loved weed. She said it helped with her mental state as well as her arthritis and other physical pains. She always loved it more than any pills she ever took. Her and my Papaw used to smoke all the time before I was born. They gave it up to make sure they were good parents to my youngest uncle and great grandparents to me. And they were... despite the fact that I think they'd have been even cooler if they had kept smoking weed.

But the next day hell began all over again. My favorite Great Aunt called me and asked me to come to my Nana's apartment because Candy and her crackhead friend were over there packing up whatever they wanted. My youngest Uncle who had flown in said it looked like a couple of rats running in and out of the apartment...

My Aunt kept making little comments to Candy about how greedy she was acting and Candy kept getting bitchy with her and claimed all she was getting was her sons stuff. She tried to say she hadn't touched anything that was Nana's because she knew that was mine.

What bullshit. She had already packed up and taken all of Nana's collectable stuff that was on top of the cabinets in her kitchen, including an eagle set that Nana told me herself were hers and that she was pissed at my cousin because he kept stealing them off her cabinets and putting them in his room.

The next day my Aunt and I showed up to get some clothes for my other Aunt (Nana had like 5 sisters, so I have 5 great Aunts)... I had to climb through the window that Candy stupidly left open even though she deadbolted the door to keep me out...

While we were there Candy came flying up in her jeep (the neighbors had called her and told her we were there). And she barged into the apartment and immediately walks up to me in the hallway accusing me of stealing her sons TV and telling me I better bring it back... literally catching an attitude with me and accusing me of stealing something that WAS my Nanas. And I know the TV was my Nanas because my Uncle told us he and his wife bought it for her at Christmas!! But here this bitch is claiming she's not a thief or a liar... while lying and accusing me of stealing something that was NOT her sons. She was trying to get a free TV out of me because she thought I was too sweet and naive to tell her no and disagree with her... and she learned real quick that that wasn't happening.

She turned to my Aunt and started cussing her and telling her she had no business being in MY NANAS apartment that was left TO ME by my dad and uncles... telling my Aunt to leave her own sisters apartment.

I went off on the bitch, I had had enough. I told her my aunt wasn't going anywhere and that it was MY apartment and that SHE was the one who needed to get the fuck out. She finally left when my Aunt dialled the police.

So we went back to getting what we were there to get (some clothes that I had already been through the day before and was now taking my other Aunt.) When my Uncle pulled up. I had put Nanas plant in the trunk of my great aunts car and had walked out with a box in my hands. Candy jumped out and made a b-line for the trunk and tried to grab the plant so I rammed the box in to her and said "What the hell do you think you're doing!?" And she went off on me about how that was "her" plant and nana would have wanted her to have it and then... then she told me... that my Nana would be disappointed in me...

She's lucky I had a box in my hand or I really and truly would have beat the shit out of her in that moment... I rammed the box into her harder and shoved her back towards my Uncles car (who had just got out and was trying to get between us) and I started yelling "Take your drunk ass home you stupid fucking bitch!!"

And honestly... I know a lot of people will say that's childish and I shouldn't have done that... but she needed to hear it from me. She needed to hear it from someone she thought truly loved her and would never say something like that to her. She needed that truth shoved down her throat to get it through her head. She is a drunk no matter how much she denies it. She shook her head at me and got back in the car and my Uncles Wife took her home.

She posted all over Facebook after that about "karma" going to get someone. And then called me a couple times and left a voicemail crying about how she wanted to talk to me and wanted me to come see her. But never once said sorry... never once admitted that what she did was fucked up.

And the best part... I wanted to save this for the end.

Candy blamed me.

The day after Nana's funeral... she came in Nana's room while I was packing some things and crying into Nana's pillows and told me "Well if I had been here Aunty wouldn't be dead! I even talked to (methehead son) and he said if he had been here she wouldn't have been dead!'

The coroner said she was gone before she hit the floor and that there was nothing we could've done. Candy had been the one buying Nana alcohol and making her mixed drinks even when she knew Nana was put back on that medication, that the doctor specifically told her not to drink alcohol with.

But Candy blamed me.

And as far as her son goes... if he had found Nana dead he would have packed everything valuable in that house and ran. He was already being searched for and had several warrants in several states... no fucking way would he have helped her or called the police.

Fuck Candy and her son. Nana was done with both of them anyway... but Candy was so delusional she didn't even realize it. She didnt realize Nana wanted me there so she wouldn't HAVE to have rides from Candy and Candy couldn't use her anymore.

Candy has since then tried to tell the whole family that my Aunt and I were bullying her and being mean to her and accusing her of shit. And at this point... I don't give a fuck if they believe her. I'll cut them off just like I did her.

(Sorry for not giving a lot of names, I'm not really comfortable doing that on here.

Hope you enjoyed a story from my crazy, fucked up life.)

Ps: Crazy Candy also took flowers off her own mother's gravestone because it was my Aunt that shes pissed at that put them out there. So, my Aunt put flowers on her sisters headstone and Candy took them off because she's pissed at her right now... took flowers from her own mother like that did anything but make her look like the piece of shit she is.

[giranswife]

Truth or Dare Au || Ch. 1

Summary: Ashley and her friends take a trip to the beach to enjoy some time away together. While they’re there, they stumble upon some interesting ruins that a few of them wish to investigate. Which will quickly become their shelter from a storm, and they decide to make the time worth it by having some fun. Little do they know that by starting a game of truth or dare, they will be sealing their fate with a vengeful spirit.

W: self-insert x canon, fluff, eventual slight nsfw, eventual horror

Ship: shirey

Next Part

(( Note: This is my horror au just in time for halloween! It’s a multi parter, I know that I have a lot coming, please bear with me!! This is based off of and heavily inspired by the movie Truth or Dare. I will be using scenes and maybe some dialogue from the movie, but I will definitely be twisting the narrative a lot to fit my mix of comedy and less death. Think of it as a slightly watered down version. ))

@self-shipping-angel

The warmth of the sun from the window served as the perfect light for me to catch up on a couple pages of my book. I leaned against the kitchen counter, using the morning sunlight as my only light source. My initial idea was to finish the short read before Shiroe was out of the shower, waiting for him patiently while also completing this book. I had been trying to finish it for months, work and other things keeping me from it.

I rubbed my sleepy eyes, sipping on my tea beside me. The house was rather quiet, and I felt myself falling against my palm that rested against my cheek. The words on the page below started to blend together, and my eyelashes slowly fluttered closed. It didn’t take long for me to slowly fall asleep.

Before I could slam my head into the counter, I felt a hand slowly touch my shoulder gently. It caused me to jump a bit, my eyes fluttering open as I glanced at the man beside me.

“Oh… hey Shiroe,” I mumbled, “Did I fall asleep?”

He nodded, his hand running down my cheek. The warmth of it calmed my thudding heart, and I relaxed into my chair with a sigh.

“Yep. Almost. Are you sure you want to go?”

I nodded, sitting up from the stool and stretching my arms.

“Of course I do. I just didn’t get enough sleep as I would have wanted to last night. Besides, Sayeko and Marielle would kill me if I canceled plans.”

Shiroe shook his head, chuckling as I yawned and leaned my forehead against his stomach. He ran a hand through my hair, delicately pushing the strands as he held me close. In the peaceful quiet of the kitchen in that early morning, I could easy fall back asleep in this position. But I was both excited for this trip and ready to get out on the road for some damn fresh air.

“No they wouldn’t. I’m sure she’d understand if you were tired.”

“Yeah, but… I’ve been looking forward to this weekend for months.”

Shiroe let out a sigh, but didn’t protest. He knew that I was right, and he definitely didn’t want to upset me.

Today we were getting ready to meet up with our friends to head out to the beach for the weekend. Me and Sayeko thought it would be fun to get away for the weekend, all of us needing a break from everyday life and stress. I haven’t spent a lot of time with my friends like that in a long time. It would be great to get away and have a fun time.

After months of deadlines and meetings, this was what I needed. Shiroe felt the same, but he was just looking out for me. It’s why I loved him and why I was excited for us to get married soon. It was another reason why we needed to get away. Lately he and I have just needed a break from the world. We would technically still be with friends, but we did get a separate hotel room in the hopes of having some alone time at night.

Just as I was getting used to the feeling of his arms around me, I heard my phone chime beside me. I quickly picked it up, reading the text from Sayeko through blurry eyes.

“Oh, they’re about to pull up,” I said, quickly shutting my laptop and throwing it into its case, “Are you sure you don’t just want to take my car? It’s gonna be kind of cramped.”

“Yeah, it’ll be easier to take one car. Besides, they already agreed that they trust me driving more than any of you guys.”

“Now, I have no idea why they’d say that.”

I winked teasingly, slipping my bag onto my shoulder.

“Hey, I’m a pretty good driver,” He said, then took a better glance at my face, “What?!”

“Yes, babe, you’re a good driver. But more like you’re… too good of a driver.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

He followed me to help me grab my bags, just as Sayeko pulled up in our driveway. She should have already picked up Akatsuki and Marielle, and we were their last stop. I helped pitch in some cash so we could rent a bigger vehicle since most of us who had vehicles didn’t have one large enough for all of us.

Biting my lower lip, I tried not to giggle too hard as I spun around to face him. The look on his face was pretty adorable. He looked almost betrayed in a cute, joking sort of way.

“Shiroe, baby, I love you. But you drive like my grandmother.”

He scoffed, “I do not. I drive responsibly!”

“Too responsibly!”

“So would you rather me drive like Naotsugu?”

My eyes widened, and I had no words at that point.

The lift of his brows just made me giggle loudly, gently pushing his chest playfully. The thought was already frightening enough, and he knew that. He was there when I specifically asked Sayeko not to let Naotsugu take the wheel. At all. I’d much rather deal with Shiroe’s careful driving than his… fast and furious kind.

“Yeah, I thought so,” He laughed.

“You know, just because you won this time, doesn’t mean anything.”

I poked his chest for emphasis, pursing my lips as I noticed him getting closer. My chest heaved slowly as I tried to catch my breath from laughter. The distance was slowly closing between us, and I felt his fingers slip through my own. His lips pressed against mine so softly, that I almost didn’t feel it at first. I kissed back, smiling in between each one as my cheeks flushed red.

It wasn’t until I heard the loud knock near my ear that I suddenly jumped and yelped rather loudly.

“Are you guys ready in there?”

I rolled my eyes, quickly opening the door before he could knock that loudly again.

“Oh, there you are! What’s taking you so god damn long?”

“None of your damn business, bitch.”

“Now, that’s just rude!”

I stuck out my tongue at Naotsugu as I walked backwards towards the car.

Sayeko was already rushing out of the car to give me a hug, helping me get my bags and throw them into the trunk. Marielle rolled down her window, reaching her hand out to pinch my cheeks.

“There’s my cute sister!”

“Marielle, please, don’t-”

She stopped only long enough for her to open the door and yank me inside. Her arms wrapped around me in a tight embrace, and I was already beginning to gasp for air.

“Marielle, do we have to do this every time?” Akatsuki asked from the seat near the opposite window.

She rolled her eyes, giving me a sympathetic smile.

“Didn’t you two just see each other yesterday?” Sayeko asked, appearing behind us as she tried to help Marielle relax her fingers.

“Every day away from my sister is a terrible day!”

Finally, I was able to break free from her hold, and I slid down onto the ground as I gasped for breath. Granted, I was being a bit dramatic about the whole thing, but it really did feel like I was just getting my breath back after a long time. She literally knocked the wind out of me.

Sayeko helped me onto my feet, and she tried not to giggle from the face that I was making. I rubbed the base of my neck and chatted with the girls while Shiroe helped Naotsugu put up the rest of the bags.

“Are you ladies ready to go? You got everything?”

“Yeah, yeah we’re fine. Just waiting on you two slowpokes.”

I winked, ignoring the roll of both of their eyes.

The sun was beating down above us, which was both a good and a bad sign. It was a good sign that it was perfect beach weather, but it was bad because it made me miserable. I was feeling much better once I was inside the car, sitting in front of the AC that was blowing right on me.

“I’ll stop at a store and let you guys get some snacks. We’re about two hours out,” Shiroe said, giving my hand a little kiss before he started the car.

“Ooooh! Did you say snacks?”

“Yes, children, he did.”

“Who the hell are you calling a child?!”

“Naotsu, baby, please. Shhh…”

I rolled my eyes, folding my legs underneath me in the seat and getting more comfortable.

This was going to be a long, long ride. But I was looking forward to it. My friends may be weird and sometimes wild, but I loved them to death. This was one of the reasons why I knew that this weekend was going to be the best.

But little did I know that there was so much more in store for us. So much more than just a simple beach weekend.

Something much… much deadlier.

[tryalittlejoytomorrow]

small kaymeron things that give me life:

how they instantly start calling each other Cameron and Kay, no Mr. Black and Agent Daniels nonsense

“Well, I couldn’t have done it without my beautiful assistant”/”Don’t ever say that again”/”Yeah, nah, sounded weird coming out” aka the start of everybody shipping them and also, hey, he called her beautiful, and I’m trash

that soft moment at the ending of the pilot where they’re outside on the patio/balcony/roof/whatever, softly lit, and he tells her about Johnny and how he has to get him out and he’s soft and open and vulnerable and she’s instantly ready to go on that crusade with him

the dimples!!! on that man!!! when he smiles when Kay tells him she saw his special on TV and thought it was fantastic!!! fantastic!!! the way his whole face glows as he says “fantastic, wow,” because he’s so happy she liked it even tho he hardly knows the woman

the whole “we’re coming for you” over the phone with MW and the ridiculous hotness of these two standing together with their heads bent over the phone and the sheer dedication in their respective gazes

how Kay keeps telling Deakins time and time again that Cameron’s good and can do some real good with them

the look on Kay’s face when she watches him do magic tricks and interact with their witness kid, you just know her ovaries are kinda imploding then, and so were mine

“Who wants to lose their head?” *Kay grabs him* “Okay, point taken” and his fucking smirk, jesus fuck, the smirk on that man’s face is unholy and she knows it

Cam running and yelling her name even if it’s a staged act, because, come the fuck on, the intensity in that man??? have you noticed how fast he runs for a woman he hardly knows? come on, even the bad guys know these two are in for the long haul

the fact that Kay is always sitting/standing close to him at wrap-up parties and they somehow always find their way to some isolated corner of the Archive??? and drink just the two of them???

Kay telling Cameron about her sister and vowing to help him with his brother because she gets it

Kay being impressed at his goodness and how he always tries to help everybody when he sees it as being naive

them shaking hands and striking a deal to work together to find MW

that little frown Kay has every time she watches him do one of his deception tricks, half-worried, half-impressed

that small moment in the museum when she tells him about Caroline and she’s so soft and vulnerable and he listens to her stories and uh, throwback to the one time he did the same and she listened much??? this is the stuff of otp legends

“Don’t shoot, it’s me!” and Cam pouting because Kay’s not impressed with him

the proud smile on Kay’s face when Cameron saves Vivian from plummeting to her death, like she’s all like “THAT’S MY MAN RIGHT THERE, 10/10 WOULD RECOMMEND”

“Grab your wand”/”I don’t have a wand, that’s, uh, a thing she does, that’s hilarious” *runs after Kay* “You’re hilarious Kay!”

Cameron beating himself up for ignoring Kay’s orders and getting Johnny’s hopes up and Kay jumping in to reassure him that they will catch MW

have I said anything about how they don’t know anything about personal space???

“is that your face on that pen?”

Kay constantly telling him he’s doing good whenever he beats himself down

the way Kay seems to own a key to the Archive because she just always pops in and out like she owns the place, and looks so at home there??

Kay giving him shit for lying to his ex and teasing him

the way Kay always marvels at his tricks until she admits magic - Cameron - is growing on her

how Kay slowly transitions to calling him Cam more and more

“He’s one of us - you called him a civilian, he’s one of us. If one of your guys went missing would you wait 24 hours?” the sheer intensity and protectiveness in that woman, dear lord, I fear for anyone stupid enough to try and keep Cameron away from her, insert Hozier here

Kay reassuring Jonathan that they’ll get Cameron back and thus showing him and us how much she cares about Cam

the utter sheer fear on Kay’s face during the whole vault scene, the way she clenches her fingers around Jordan’s shoulder upon watching Cam suffocate

how Cam ultimately refuses to help MW because he can’t bear betraying Kay after everything she’s done for him

the fact that Kay rode in the ambulance with him after he almost died!!! and they let us know in such a careless way but it means so much!!!

Kay being pissed at Cameron throughout the next episode because he scared the hell out of her by almost dying

Cam slow-clapping at Kay for her Oscar-worthy performance during their deception at the police station

“So, I think I've officially run out of ways to apologize. So I just. Are we good, you and I? I mean, or just close to, I mean, a little good?/ “I wasn't completely honest with you, either. I was mad, but I was also...seeing you almost suffocate in that vault, it really scared me. I'm not so good at being scared.”/”But you're scary all the time.”/”This was different.” HE WAS DIFFERENT.

“Cam, put the moon down”/”But it’s gonna be cool.”

Kay grinning at that goddamn dumb fajitas joke, she’s so in love

“Take your clothes off”/”What?” and that dumb dumbo doesn’t get why but still does it

“You know you don’t have to add “The amazing” every time you say your name” but come on we all know that’s gonna lead to some sexy times right?? right???

THE ENTIRETY OF EPISODE 11

like, okay. let’s be methodical about this: Cam knows her coffee order. But MOREOVER, he owns all the ingredients to make it. He bought fucking cinnamon for her, because let’s not even pretend that any single guy in his thirties would own cinnamon on his own. The Amazing Cameron Black™ went to the grocery store and bought cinnamon to make his future wife coffee. Because he doesn’t only know her coffee order as they wait in line at Starbucks, no, hell no. He actually makes her coffee for her.

 “You know me so well”/”I’m a good observer” and drinking their coffee in sync like the old married couple they are

actually, timeline wise, they’ve known each other for so little time and still he knows her so well?? be still, my heart

this exchange “So, when were you gonna tell me?” /”Tell you what?”/ “That you dated a super spy.”/ “I wasn't hiding it from you.”/ “I've replayed eight conversations we've had about exes in my head. And it could've come up easily in any one of them. What else are you not telling me?”/ “A lot.”/”Fair enough.“ uh, excuse me, they’ve had EIGHT conversations about exes??? just exactly how many nights do they spend drinking and talking late into the night sharing life stories like this??? Kay has a toothbrush at the Archive, I’m calling it. And has definitely slept in one of Cameron’s shirt before.

uh, let’s talk about how good of a guy Cameron is when he pushes Kay to go deal with her unfinished business with her ex because he wants her to be happy and he thinks Isaac is what makes her happy???

and how Johnny helps him realize he’s jealous but still, right before it hits him, Cam’s still saying “if she’s happy, I’m happy” because he wants her to be happy even if it’s not with him??? god, let me live

but also, let’s talk about Kay’s face when Cam asks her if she’s hungry and she thinks he’s gonna ask her out for dinner, that’s pure elation, girl was totes ready to go out with him

CAMERON RISKING HIS LIFE TO PROTECT HER

CAMERON TAKING A BULLET FOR HER

even Isaac seeing right through the “fake” confession of love and telling Kay that Cam did it for her

the whole scene with Kay coming to the Archive to see Cameron as he nurses a nasty bruise from the bullet

that boy’s face when Kay tells him Jonathan told her she wasn’t Cameron’s type, he has such a crush, but he goes beyond a crush, and he can’t tell her because he still thinks then that she’s into Isaac

“Isaac just felt like moving backward, I’d rather focus on the future.” WITH YOU. BECAUSE I LOVE YOU. That’s totes what Kay was thinking but not saying.

Cam thinking about how he couldn’t betray Kay even to save Johnny because she believed and trusted him

Kay saying again that she’d hunt him down if he did something illegal

“Kay, you’re amazing.”

“You shot me!” /”I shot her more.”

Both of them realizing that they still want to work together despite seemingly being done with Johnny’s investigation and having no more real, legit reason to work together again

“You know I expect front-row tickets to your big comeback show.” /”My show? Hmm. Of course. Yeah.”/ “When we started out, didn't you hate magic?”/ “It's grown on me.”/ “Mm. There's no reason I can't come and help out every now and then, right?”/ “I thought you were only working with the FBI to help Jonathan.”/ “It's grown on me.” OTP OTP OTP TAG RIGHT THERE.

“If Kay says she’ll protect you, she will” and the enamored look and smile she gives him when he says that????

how fucking gorgeous they look together in their party clothes at the consulate, like, goddamn, wow, why isn’t there more gifsets of them walking with linked arms and looking like sex on a stick

the happiness and giddiness at the wrap-up party, they’re goddamn leaning into each other, they look like a fucking couple I can’t

let’s not talk about the ending, it hurts, it hurts so fucking much, but the FEELS for fuck’s sake, the goddamn feels

[alliebruns-blog]

The Namibia/Panama Crossings Part Two. The Desert, Day 5

DAY 5 Conception - The wreck of the Eduard Bohlen - 9 miles (AKA Look Mum, I Crossed A Desert!)

I wake up with a HANGOVER because I am not used to drinking wine anymore. Just a baby hangover, but a baby one when you have a desert to finish crossing is still a pain in the arse. Coffee and salt tabs for breakfast plus a bit of granola - and we are off. Darren is fresh as anything, so he whizzes ahead to try and catch Dani and Jim. I realise that I am going to be alone for a lot of today. Not sure if that’s a good thing. I don't feel mentally strong, but there you go. It is what it is.  That’s life. 

It’s a grey morning and I struggle to find the footprints that Dani and Jim have left for us. The dunes have more of less flattened out now - they are more undulating than mega frustrating, and it’s cold, because we are heading to the coast - I have 2 layers on. It feels like a different life to the one we were living yesterday. I trek away on my own, with my own weird thoughts. They are thoughts of pride, mixed with the inability to accept what I have done. Feelings of ‘who the fuck cares’ and feelings that I should try and keep myself together. I want to sit and cry. 

The irony of runnable terrain when you are totally exhausted...

I trot over a small dune, and suddenly I can see and smell the sea. It’s almost too much for me to take in. It’s almost over. The smell ignites my childhood memories of holidays, and the mist is rolling in across the flat sand. It’s beautiful and bleak. 

I keep trotting on - not wanting it to end, but willing it to end at the same time. What will I do when I get to wreck? Will I cry? No, I can’t cry. I just want to cry at the moment. I am all out of snacks and everyone is ahead of me. I am last. Always last. 

Old German mining railway left to rot on the skeleton coasts salt plains

The sea is not getting any nearer, but I come over a dune towards some plains. The salt plains. They are wet and cold and salty. Do what they say on the tin. The sand drops away under my feet and it’s more like an estuary than a desert. In front of me, is what looks like water, but I have learnt not to trust the desert. Turns out that this time it IS water. My feet are very wet and my shoes are full of grit.  

Seem fine to walk on right? 

NOPE. 

The water gets deep quickly and is running fast. It has dead fish in it. It’s about calf deep now, and my radio comes into action. It’s Jim. He has already crossed it. He says it will take me 45 mins at least. I look at it, and, being mental and not being able to judge distance, think “nah, that’s ten mins”. It takes me 90 minutes to cross the fast flowing estuary and get to the support vehicle. I have no pictures or video of it, as my hands and phone were too wet and frankly, I was too exhausted to film it. 

One of the things I remember vividly about this trip is those 90 mins. It was so hard. Lifting your tired legs and feet out of wet, deep mud.  Feeling like you are going backwards, and having nobody to talk to. The support vehicle seemed like it was getting further and further away. It was horrible - really horrible. It’s something that in times of stress I will always recall. Relentless forward progress. You will get there. I stood and shouted the word ‘FUCK’ many, many times at the water. I hated it. 

Back on firmer land with unidentifiable dead shit. 

Eventually, I made it to firmer sand and got to the vehicle. I said very little to Danny and David. I wanted to change my socks - I had 3 miles to go, so really no need. I felt mental, and probably looked and talked like I was. My shoes were filled with grit and water and I did my best to dust them off. Danny and David told me it was only 5km to the end. I put my head down and started marching. And then I started to cry. 

I didn’t want to cry at the end. I wanted people to think I was cool and casual, not overwhelmed by what we had done. I don’t want people to think I am ‘girly’ or ‘weak’. So I cried on my own. the irony of this is that crying doesnt make you weak - it helps you remain strong. I know this now - I couldn’t compute it at the time.  

Vertebrae from a whales spine, the skeleton coast. 

I kept on marching, I wanted to see the things I had come to see. The whale bones that litter the skeleton coast. Old wine bottles, washed up from ships that met their fate here. I saw a lot of it. Jackals coming out of their holes to chase down baby seals. Pieces of wood and metal from vessels long gone. It was bleak, astonishing and humbling. A world lost in sand and time. 

Wine bottles in the sand 

Then, in the distance, I see it. The wreck of the Eduard Bohlen. He has sat there since 1909 when he was wrecked in thick fog. The Bohlen completely symbolises the loneliness of the Skeleton Coast. It’s remains lie rusting in the sand, partially buried. A home for jackals, bones of their prey scattered around the hull.  A symbol of the possible future of mankind. Once full of wonder and promise - now a wreck forgotten and alone. It’s a lot for me to think about. I think about how transient everything is. 

Whale bones hidden in sand

Whale bones covered in sand. Wreck of the Bohlen in the background.

I try and run, but my brain tells me no. I am done. Exhausted. I take in what is going on around me and march it in. Nothing here but the remnants of a once promising and golden future, that the people of the 1900’s would have been proud of. Old glass bottles against dead whale bones. All preserved, but meaning nothing now to the people they once meant the world to. 

But I’ve done it. I have fucking done it. I have become the first woman to cross the Namib Desert on this course from east to west. I hold it together, but the team form an arch with their hands, and I run through it. It’s over. They know I have been crying, they just don't say it. 

An emotional little Bailoid tries to hold it together...

The finish line

I am given a beer, and I take a minute to calm myself down. The feelings that I have are not really for writing here, mainly because I don't know how to write them. I am both proud and empty, I have forgotten the hard bits. 127 miles through one of the most hostile environments on earth. I am tired, so tired.  Race to the Wreck. I have done it. 

Knackered

Ghost ship.

Time is running out to leave - we have a 7 hour drive out of here. I don't have much time to get myself together. I eat lunch, have a quick run around the wreck and wish I could stay here for a week investigating it all.  We get in the fun bus. We’re all very, very quiet. The drive back is one of the scariest thing about this trip. The fun bus going up and down dunes at what feels like vertical angles is terrifying. We pass a dead humpback whale on the shoreline, more wrecks, dead seals and hopeful jackals. It takes seven hours of driving across those dunes, but then, suddenly, we hit tarmac and we are back in the human world. 

Thats what a dead humpback whale looks like then...

More wrecks on the way out

Some casual driving on the way back..... FFS

We have one night in a hotel before we fly to Cape Town the following day. This journey is not over. One days travel and then its Man vs Table Mountain (or the Cape Town Three Peaks Challenge of Death as I have snappily renamed it). And that’s before we travel to Panama to attempt the double traverse in a journey that fundamentally changes everything for me.

So thanks for reading the first instalment of this ridiculous trip. If you want more info on the race it’s on sale now and I am happy to talk to  anyone about it - just get me on the website or social media. 

Next up on the blog: Man Vs Table Mountain

THANK YOU….. 

RAT RACE CREW

Massive thanks to Jim and Rob and the whole team at Rat Race for once again trusting me to trial one of their ridiculous ideas. This is a hard event, a really hard event, but totally achievable and I am honoured to have been part of the Test Pilot team and hope I have done you proud. I would recommend this to anyone who has ever sought to do more than just a desert multi-day. This is the real deal - an immersion in culture and a world first. And it’s on sale now, kids! Click here for details.

Thanks to Dani Brodie for representing the female side of endurance challenges with me - this was her first ever multi-day event - no pressure then, throw yourself in at the deep end why not? She handled it with style and enthusiasm, and in the end totally nailed the whole route. A total pleasure to be with, she provided some much needed female company on those nights round the brai, and I am so glad I got to spend this time with her. 

Handsome Pete Rees for making me laugh with his fear of pretty much everything, his health and safety lectures (NO IBUPROFEN BEFORE FOOD!) and providing us with top notch pictures and video that makes us look a lot more epic than we actually are. 

Lastly thanks to Darren - my adventure husband. It really is like being married - we constantly bicker and don’t sleep with each other. Magical. Darren - I know I can be an annoying rat, and so thanks for putting up with me and my stupid voices.  It’s good to know I have a constant to talk to when things get horrible and your support means the world. 

SUPPORT CREW

Eternal thanks to the crew put together by David Scott who runs Sandbaggers. Without their local and in depth knowledge of the Namib, we would never have made it. Without the expertise of the drivers, the trucks could not have made the journey over the dunes, carrying our supplies, tents and bags. I’ll be honest, some of those climbs in the car were touch and go….. and who the hell tries to run over an Ostrich? MONSTERS LIKE YOU, THAT’S WHO. 

[ylemous]

Self shipping is weird for me because I don't really do the cute mushy romance thing but I still really crave everything else about relationships minus the cute sappy soft stuff that most selfship posts cater to.

I wouldn't call myself aro because I really like the devotion and sincerity side of romance, plus stuff that's like friendship+, but the moment it gets cute I'm just so Discomfort™ (not in other people's relationships, just mine, dw).

Shieldbrother with benefits is my ideal relationship. I want someone who will face God and walk backwards into hell with me.