#the original stories being shit allowed for people to develop their own ideas of the characters

[death-himself]

i really feel like the way people fought back against the uwuification of ticci toby ended up making his characterization one of the most diverse in the fandom

i’ve seen versions of him where he’s just a dumbass teenager, where he’s cold and intelligent, where he’s really gentle and caring to people, where he’s angry at everyone and treats everyone like shit, and everything in between

and while they all do have similar strings that make them all still feel like toby, they still feel very different, like different iterations of how his trauma would affect him

idk i just don’t think i see that kind of character diversity with characters like jeff or sally or even eyeless jack, and i just find that really cool

[swordfright]

https://www.tumblr.com/swordfright/756502816281018368/what-do-you-think-is-your-most-controversial-dsmp?source=share

I remember sending this to a bunch of dsmp blogs (starting with elmhat I think ?) bc I like when people share ideas/opinions who diverge from the main consensus because I find it the most efficient way for people to stick to canon and not fanon since people can have different interpretations of event

And it was super interesting to see the one about the experimentation being after prison rather than before (loved the two LN and Q ones too but as you said they were a bit more common. Would love to see your take on c!slime though now)

(And I wouldn't have a problem with you giving unpopular opinion about the fandom either but to be clear I was not trying to start anything with my first question, I just like seeing uncommon takes)

Don't worry lol I didn't assume you were trying to start shit. Ok, so c!Slime is pretty interesting in that he's the closest thing we have to an NPC in what is otherwise a roleplay, which implies certain things about how he can be used in the narrative.

A little bit of quick background: I spent a LOT of time as a kid doing RP online (it was an original story set in the Death Note universe and it happened on a website that went bankrupt in like 2017 and no longer exists lmfao don't worry about it) and idk what RP etiquette is like in other communities, but in the community I was a part of, it was sort of frowned upon for players to outsource heavy plot/character development material to NPCs. It was allowed and people did it, but it was seen as sort of a cop-out. The underlying idea being that if you're gonna bother to do RP, your character's most important interactions should be with other PCs, in part because it helps build/strengthen the RP community and in part because it better entrenches your character's storyline in the storylines of other PCs, which in turn encourages other players to keep RPing and keeps the story going. Again, creating NPCs was very common, but players were discouraged from having entire arcs or character trajectories be highly dependent on NPCs. It was seen as sort of a cheap, low-effort way of progressing your character's development without having to coordinate plot beats with other players, and doing it too often was seen as sort of antithetical to what RP is trying to achieve as a form of gaming-storytelling. To me, c!Slime is a classic example of when an RPer outsources a little too much narrative weight onto an NPC.

First of all, I wanna clarify that it's kinda difficult to define what an NPC is or isn't on this server, but I'd say c!Slime is more of an NPC because even though he's played by a CC with some degree of improv, we know that cc!Quackity specifically wrote c!Slime's character to fulfill a narrative role and asked cc!Slime to play that character - as opposed to alternate characters played by CCs of their own accord (Sam Nook, Dream XD, Sam Bucket, Mexican Dream, etc.) So, for example, I don't see Sam Bucket as an NPC but I do see c!Slime as an NPC. c!Slime wasn't an original creation on the part of the player, he's a narrative tool (which is fine, but it does mean that what he can and can't do in the story is limited to what cc!Q needed him to do.)

There are some things I think the addition of c!Slime did accomplish. For one, Q's interactions with him provide a platform for more introspective character work on Q's part. And while I that character work could've been done by having Q interact with a PC instead, I do think Slime is better positioned to act as an apprentice figure because he had almost no lore prior to Las Nevadas and didn't enter the story with baggage or ties to any other major characters. He's a blank slate, which makes him really easy to use as a narrative device. Q voices thoughts and ideas to Slime that he can't voice to other characters (usually because it would be OOC for him to do so, or wouldn't make sense in context), which means that Slime is sort of a vehicle for delivering Q characterization to the audience.

This is all fine and I think a lot of it was done fairly well. I like cc!Slime's acting and I think the character is a fun addition to the LN crew. That said, I don't think the payoff was great. Slime being an NPC really undermined what I assume cc!Q was going for with End of Las Nevadas, in large part because he doesn't have well-established relationships with other characters. Aside from Q, Slime basically only ever interacts with Tommy, Foolish and Ranboo, and even those interactions are limited to a really tiny handful of streams. Punz capturing and manipulating him, Slime helping c!Dream confront Quackity...all that stuff could have been a lot more interesting if it had more time to marinate. Like, I love the IDEA of Slime and c!Dream interacting, but we don't really get any meaningful interactions between them outside of Slime's function as a storytelling tool. He's there when he needs to be, and only ever when he needs to be.

For instance, I would've loved to see what Slime thinks about Q's slime army. It's really weird to model your mindlessly obedient slave army after your friend. That was a weird ass thing for Q to do, and it would've been cool to see Slime react to that. But because he's more NPC than PC, and because highly scripted lore like the LN series doesn't really encourage deviation, we never get to find that out. Slime doesn't ever really get to be his own character, which in the end kinda undermines a lot of the character development he triggers for c!Quackity because at the end of the day, it's really transparent that Slime only exists to be a prop. It's a kind of one-sided relationship that's unique to RP.

I think End of Las Nevadas was weak for other reasons too, but uhhhh yeah the Slime stuff bothered me a bit. Would've liked to see him do more. And he disappears after pushing Q off the ledge and, to my knowledge, we never see him again! If he had been more PC and less storytelling tool, presumably other characters would've had opportunities to react to Slime's role in the events of that stream, or notice that he's missing/back again/missing. But instead, he's able to just vanish from the story after he's fulfilled his role because that's all he was ever supposed to do.

[oflorien]

lucifer on a cracker here we go.

and to be so fucking clear, I cannnnnnot process this kind of thing and i cannot reiterate how debilitating having to address something like this is.

like you can tag me, it's okay. go ahead.. i know it's super uncomfortable when someone calls out the morality of saying misogynistic things that are directly linked to erasure. not once in a single word has it been said that people can't ship with who they want to. not once was it stated you cannot have au's either. insinuating personal attack is leaning into feelings because of the relevancy of my post and what narrative being so dismissive like that plays into. The entire point is the relevancy of calling out and abhorring the idea of celebrían being the one you settle for because you can't have galadriel. that's not objectively disgusting that simply is disgusting rhetoric. i'm not out of line or attacking someone personally because of this? its a dick thing to say lets be so fucking for real here. i'm, not coddling or holding anyone's hand through this either. as both a person of colour and someone neurodivergent, I'm tired of entertaining everyone's interpretation of clear context and how it's translating into. if feelings were hurt then you missed the entire point. it was context as clear as it comes. this isn't just an RPC issue either, this is a fandom as a whole and an influx of new people saying terrible things about female characters in general as well.

Have au's, be creative no one is stopping anyone, i have ships that make me uncomfortable in my blacklist just like everyone else and i protect my eyes. i have opinions as does everyone else. the fact that people are coming to the tolkien fandom after years of not knowing is so exciting. no one is hating on anyone for shipping something or inciting a smear campaign but to drag it out as such? own up to saying out-of-pocket shit like that, apologize and move on. everyone is allowed to grow. THAT WAS THE ENTIRE POINT OF MY ORIGINAL POST.

please know that dragging out a narrative that doesn't exist is also not objectively worse, it just is worse. for the record so its stated and in the name of transparency: i hate galadriel and elrond as a ship but i cant stop someone from shipping it,i cant walk into someone's inbox and say fuck you for shipping this you're a disgusting human being because that's morally wrong i just put it in my black list. what i cited was disgusting WAS WHAT WAS SAID AND SO DISSMISSIVE TO CELEBRIAN AS A CHARACTER. but if you want to entice some rings of power canon in there, make sure you note that when they met he was essentially an orphaned child and she was a fully developed elven female. in fact, i used to hate galadriel and sauron as a ship because she was one of the only beings in middle earth who he couldn't fuck with. but i have incredibly creative friends who have written such gripping, beautiful stories that bless my dash every single day that I've now come to love that pairing.

in case it should be read again. here is my original post i have absolutely every right to place a boundary in my space. the way this whole thing has been spun into being a personal attack is absolutely insane.

[fitpacs]

Sorry in advance if I ramble on for too long,

I think that if the server allowed for more chill game play it could have held on a bit longer. I know I'm a bit of an outsider because I got into qsmp much later, but having the players just hang out together on the server is much more entertaining to me than lore heavy streams.

I must say that Fit's lore streams feel different to me, because he created and merged his own story with the server, but ultimately it was his story to tell.

I think the server wanted to do too many big things in a short amount of time, which made people frustrated and exhausted. I also think that there might have been too many cooks in the kitchen, without a proper headchef. No proper guide or story book.

Personally, even though I absolutely love the little eggs running around causing mayhem and emotional damage, having them actually hatch into "dragons" could have solved many issues regarding their time management. Once they hatched, they could have just popped up whenever they wanted, instead of needing to be online every time a parent was on the server.

It would also have cut back on trying to make up lore for the eggs.

Long story short, having the players just hang out on the island and make up stories for themselves if they wanted to, build beautiful things, share each other's culture and holidays and if it had cut back a lot on lore it would probably have made qsmp last longer.

🐝 Anon ❤️

do not apologise, my sweet bee anon!

i completely agree with you when you say the server wanted to do too many things in a short amount of time. we never really got the chance to appreciate any of the events (the ones that were only for a day, such as festa junina etc) because the higher ups were already pushing the next upcoming event onto us - and i completely agree that it would have frustrated and exhausted people!

if i remember correctly, even before everything went to shit, multiple ccs that hadn’t logged on for a while felt almost afraid to because there was so much lore going on with the more active players and it kind of turned them off of wanting to join more often, which is the complete opposite of what the server set out to do. the idea was to join multiple languages and cultures altogether in one space, and in the timeframe of a few months it ended up only being the same select group of creators who logged on daily or every other day who had intertwining lore (with a few notable exceptions).

i firmly believe the eggs were originally introduced to fix that issue, and to give the less active creators more of a reason to log on, but when the egg lore started developing, that idea was kind of dampened greatly.

and none of this is the fault of the admins, obviously! some of them by their own admission had great fun with their egg lore, but we of course all know the darker side where due to the lore of other creators/the server’s lore with the federation, they were pushed if not forced to adopt multiple personas by the higher ups - which obviously would take a toll on anyone, and weren’t allowed breaks or time away, which we all know is fucked up and is a prime example of how the hunger for lore ended up being a huge detriment

i think we’re all in agreement that one of the biggest mistakes was whoever was in charge, and the fact it wasn’t someone that had the best interests of the server, audience, and staff at heart - this is also on q’s own admission.

for me personally, the format of the shelter smp (made by former staff from our server) is a really good balance of lore and chill gameplay - any of the members can join at any time and not feel like they’re behind at all - the fact that the server is also made by staff of the server proves more of that point as that’s obviously how they wanted to run our server, if they were allowed freedom over their (multiple) characters

and it’s not even as if the ccs didn’t have chemistry so wouldn’t be able to play without lore - this was proven in the occasional chill non-lore days, as well as the times we got other games with them such as the among us lobby that time and the fact they still continue to play games together! i just wonder if the ccs were, to an extent, told something by the higher ups also - obviously something much nicer than whatever the admins were told!

the eggs, as much as i adore them, did end up being as much of a detriment to the server as much as a blessing. because of how frequently the eggs logged on (again, due to the pressure from the higher ups) the audience and the ccs alike of course got accustomed very quickly to each egg admin’s style of acting and writing on the signs - and the server got so dependent on the eggs it was at the cost of the admins’ free time in that they didn’t have any.

i’m always in two minds as to if the server would’ve lasted longer if there was less dependency on lore - because would the exposing of the higher ups have happened as soon as it did if the admins weren’t so overworked? i honestly don’t know, my mind flip-flops on it.

sorry for rambling back at you, my sweet, i just miss our server more than anything :(

[mermaidsirennikita]

ARC REVIEW: The Other Side of Disappearing by Kate Clayborn

4.25/5. Releases 3/26/24.

Vibes: true crime podcasts (critical), soft hero/hard heroine, complicated families, and dropping those defenses even when it's hard

Heat Index: 6/10

Ten years ago, Jess and Tegan's mother disappeared--with her con artist boyfriend Lynton Baltimore, made famous by a popular podcast. Now, the podcast's creator is on their doorstep with her protegee, Adam. They want to find Lynton; and Jess and Tegan could be their key. The last thing Jess wants to do after raising her sister on her own is go down this rabbit hole. But if Tegan is going, so is she; and as they unravel their mother's secrets, Jess finds herself more exposed than she's ever been before... and, even more horrifyingly, opening up to Adam (and his massive shoulders, perfect for crying into).

I was a little worried by the premise of this book. Don't get me wrong, it's a great idea--but was it going to be women's fiction? The answer: nope! This is a great example of how to write a book that has a big plot, and has well-developed characters beyond the two leads... while still being a romance. That's something that used to be way more of a norm, but I've noticed lately that it seems to have become all or nothing. You're either all focus on the leads, no plot and paper-thin supporting characters, or the romance gets crumpled up and it's women's fiction. (Which is fine! Women's fiction is fine! It's just generally not my thing.)

Trust Kate Clayborn to give you all the feelings about EVERYONE involved, along with a thought-provoking and twisty-turny concept, while never sacrificing the strength of the love story. I was so invested in Adam, a truly good dude who isn't without his own sore spots, slowly worming his way into Jess's heart. And Jess is simply a great heroine--wounded and tough and a bit angry but also desperately holding it together for the sister she's raised. I loved watching them fall in love. In fact, this is probably my favorite Kate Clayborn book so far.

Quick Takes:

--I am very vocal about finding a lot of good guy heroes boring, and that is because "good" often seems to translate into "perfect" or "completely toothless". Adam is a great example of how to write a good guy hero correctly. Kate Clayborn generally knows how to write about good people who aren't perfect and are compelling.

Here, Adam is essentially a gentle giant with great intentions in the long term... Who still compromises his morals initially. (Not for long! and I would say that she could've pushed him to compromise those morals for a bit longer, but I get it.) And he doesn't always handle everything perfectly, and he's not always smooth, and he's interesting and hot and kind of the boyfriend I feel is ideal without being PERFECT.

Also: his ears go pink when he's embarrassed, and he is definitely a bit embarrassed about his Bigness. Like, he's always bumping into shit because he's so Big, and that's embarrassing, you guys!!! This is. So important to me.

--I'm so into the Eldest Daughter Syndrome Stuff, as an eldest daughter. Jess and Tegan's relationship is so great, sitting in that space between parent and sibling, and at a really awkward point (as Tegan just turned eighteen). I found Jess deeply relatable, and her prickliness makes perfect sense... while still getting in her way.

Honestly, Jess's character growth is the type of thing I don't think heroines are allowed to do enough? It's introspective and difficult, and I absolutely loved where we ended up.

--There's a supporting character, original podcast creator/Adam's mentor Salem, who went in some really different directions. I kind of loved having a character who was like... not malevolent, but not wholly good, too? Who was selfish, and not an ideal parent, and a LADY?

In general, the commentary on true crime fandom stuff and podcasting is so good. I think we've definitely reached this point where true crime podcasts have really dipped heavily into exploitation. Of course there are good ones! But let us be real. I loved the way that she confronted this being both a story and Jess and Tegan's lives. And, in addition, how knowing that early on conflicts with Adam's sense of morality.

--As a random note... I've noticed recently that a lot of romance novels, even those by people I so love, have parents do some really shitty stuff, and then shove in this reconciliation with their kids at the end. I think this has to do with the need for an HEA. But like. You can have an HEA that involves acknowledging that your parent is shitty and doesn't deserve forgiveness. Trust.

All I'll say is that I really loved how Clayborn handled the parent stuff in this book.

The Sex:

Kate Clayborn always leans more towards the romantic than the explicit in her sex scenes, though they are open door. There are a few scenes in this book, and they're reeeeally sensual. I loved the way she wrote the dialogue during sex scenes, and like, the sexiness of Jess and Adam sneaking around on this road trip with her teenage sister right there. Ooh, it was hot.

Insightful, romantic, and challenging in some ways, The Other Side of Disappearing really impressed me. I already liked Kate Clayborn, and this only made me more excited about her future work.

Thanks to NetGalley and Kensington for providing me with a copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.

[henlp]

Octopath Traveler II

I think its biggest problem comes down to bloat. OT2 really feels like a needless exercise in padding a working formula, yet it didn't seem to have done much for improving the quality-of-life features.

The most blatant example really is the new Day/Night cycle. Sure, you can control it with a single push of a button, and there are demonstrable changes to combat when you do so... but with Path Actions? What prior to release I thought would've been a great way to make each individual traveler able to stand more on their own, eventually devolved into redundancy. The first game already had, in essence, only four kinds of actions that you could perform in two different ways; OT2 pumps that to FOUR different ways. And I don't know if I managed to last longer than most, but I quickly stopped caring about using Mug or Coerce to find enemy weaknesses around the halfway point.

Which really begs the question: how many people, realistically, are gonna be playing this game without picking up every traveler? ESPECIALLY as their first (and likely, ONLY) playthrough? Look, Team Asano TRIED, I can concede that much, since the four different ways each action can be done (Level, percentage chance, exchange, battle) are distinct, and do technically allow you to perform certain Path Actions earlier/more easily, if you have that particular traveler with you sooner. But with almost all Path Actions being located in fast-travel spots on your map, and no real impedements to your backtracking, I don't see the point.

That's the big one, to be sure, but the bloat is everywhere: splintering Story Chapters into several different sections, spread across the map (which again, is not gonna be much of an issue UNLESS you're not picking up every traveler nor following the recommended level thresholds); a bunch of sidequests that are almost exclusively about jumping from one place to another, then back again; how at some points, the stories fucking drags ON and ON, after the point is made and no further character development is being achieved.

And of course, one of the biggest (optional) sins in turn-based RPGs: utterly anemic grinding. I can't believe I'm saying this (but it's true), FINAL FANTASY XIII had a better idea for 'hidden' grind spots during its very linear story progression. Sure, it all goes to shit in the postgame, but the clever implementation of particular enemy groups and spawn locations to assist players in exchanging time for power, is something that more TBRPGs should implement to alleviate optional grinding. Thank you, Lightning, now get back in your cage.

Octopath Traveler 2 isn't a very hard game, mind you, and neither is it super easy (except the final boss, whom I trounced with no strategy; conversely, the superboss whooped my ass, until I found the perfect cheese strat to serve him). The difficulty balance is VERY GOOD; it's just that optional gap for max level, that is so infuriating to achieve, when it's blatantly obvious how it could've been implemented, and WELL, to minimize these frustrations.

And with all that said... I'd still recommend the game. It's a really, REALLY good turn-based RPG, one I think fans of the genre should absolutely get into. Yeah, it still has the same problems with the stories of each traveler not really intertwining, but the writing is simple yet coherent, while not being up its own ass. And I'm only as harsh as I am, because it is a sequel, so it should've been either the same, or better; not this odd sidestep with more money pumped into the visual effects and spritework. Just be mindful that, while you ABSOLUTELY should play the original first, you might get frustrated if you notice the game wasting your time (and I checked: 120+ hours in OT1, nearly 160 hours in OT2).

So with that all out of the way, I'm just gonna go through my previous 'feature wishlist', and see what's been implemented in OT2. Please look that up for context on each bullet point.

Keeping traveler locations hidden on the select screen and world-map: NOT ADDED;

Avoiding map area redundancy: Not really;

Leaving enemy HP visible with Analyze: NOT ADDED;

Organize inventories: NOT ADDED (automatic);

In-game encyclopedias: NOT ADDED;

Unique weapon sprites: Kinda? Not every weapon, but a lot;

Changing Job sprites: NOT ADDED;

Better ways to farm stat-increasing items: NOT ADDED;

Formation changes outside of taverns: ONLY added during the final stretch of the game, and for pre-epilogue;

Escape Rope-equivalent item/skill: NOT ADDED;

More varied sidequests: DEFINITELY NOT ADDED;

Better map/radar: NOT ADDED;

Cait Den questline & secret grind zone: DEFINITELY NOT ADDED;

Artifacts seller/collector: NOT ADDED;

Monster wrangler shop: NOT ADDED;

Character-unique subjob incentives: Not added, bit of a pipedream;

'Tavern Stories'-type sidequests: relegated to Travel Banters, without any actual cutscenes or visuals to accompany them.

[sabrecrane]

Magic

When it comes to fantasy, you'll notice that every book has their own magic system. Some use runes, some use magical orb things, some make it so humans already have magic because of their surroundings and learn to cast it in schools, etc. There is one thing I struggled with though -- how do I make the magic for my world unique?

First, I thought about everything I enjoyed in media. I liked end of the world movies, I like post apocalyptic shit, I love the idea of dangerous magic that could kill people and I also loved any books that had demons in. Keeping this in mind, I began worldbuilding.

In this post I'm going to be talking a lot about my book Above The Surface which is book one of the ASTAMICIA series just to give you an idea of how you can make literally anything work in your fantasy world, no matter how far fetched it may seem.

MAGIC BACKSTORY

Astamicia is the name of the magic that originates from the asteroid hovering just outside the Earth’s atmosphere. When parts of the asteroid break of, each part contains Astamicia within it. When it enters the planet’s atmosphere, it unfreezes and spreads throughout the land upon impact. The reason for the asteroid remaining as stationary as it does is currently unknown. 

This is actually a chapter from a worldbuilding book I made explaining in detail how the magic in the ASTAMICIA universe works in the form of a journal belonging to one of the side characters who is a scientist. Here I introduce the backstory of the magic but don't give its origins away. This is the prologue to my book and as you can see I added some of the things I enjoyed; end of the world vibes, post apocalyptic, corrupted governments (sort of), etc. What the readers don't know is the origins of the magic itself so for all they know it could have been a natural occurring thing. I love the type of magic that has a history, a story behind its development, something I can build on in later chapters if I don't necessarily want to write an action packed one. In a sense it can work as filler but still carry the plot.

Different energies

PE - Positive energy is naturally in the world, in every living being, tree, and creature. It’s created from positive memories, experiences, and life itself. 

NE - Neutral energy, the balance between both PE and DE. Combined it keeps plant growth at a minimum and prevents the spread of deadly vines. 

DE - Demon energy. Made purely from negative emotions, abuse, bad memories, everything negative. This stuff poisons the land, creatures and people, sometimes creating disgusting individuals. If someone is completely corrupted by this energy, they will lose themselves to sinful behaviour, allowing a demon to take over the host’s mind. 

Another chapter from my worldbuilding book. Adding different types of energies allowed me to incorporate demons in a way that made sense. So when it comes to creating your magic system potentially have it so different powers exude different energies. Hell, your main character could have the ability to cast multiple types of these energies but don't have the right body to do so.

But don't just focus on the magic system. Also think about the issues the magic can bring, the corruption, the change in command, the arrogance, the downsides of having too much of the stuff. Oh, and don't worry about rushing to explain everything immediately in the first book, especially if it's a series. Give hints, make your readers doubt the theories they come up with, etc, but don't treat them like idiots -- let them see a scene and remember something you had foreshadowed before that makes them go 'holy shit', you know?

If you want to focus on an action packed fantasy book then maybe a backstory to your magic isn't necessarily something you want to focus on which is, of course, perfectly fine!

However, if you're going with a more adventure, slow paced book that you hope to turn into a series then backstories for most things is a good idea.

Fantasy action books allow your readers to instantly connect with characters and it'll make them eager to read the battle scenes. Fantasy adventure with a side of romance is where you want to slow things down at first and then pick up the pace as the story goes on. Keep your target audience in mind also, just to make sure you're staying on the right track.

Hope this has helped somewhat, happy writing!

[goblinpaladin]

So Why Did I Ghost Everyone And Abandon This Blog? And Why Did the DSMP fall apart? And how are these two things related?

This is going to get long, but it's been eating away at me for years, so I think it's time to rip the bandage off.

So, in mid 2020, I [Dave] was introduced to a guy named Clay (who stated he was at least 21) by an at-the-time mutual friend. I didn't think much of him, but he managed to worm his way into my personal life and friend group.

Cut to late 2020, Clay manipulated my partner [K] into falling for him and coerced me into agreeing to polyamorously date him (also allowing the two of them to date). During this time, Clay was telling us that he was the minecraft youtuber, Dream, and provided us with screenshots (which were quickly deleted after we confirmed we saw them), and even seeing him log into the minecraft server we shared As Dream.

At the end of 2020, following the Dream Cheating Scandal, Mr. Beast bought out the Dream Name and actually replaced Clay (so this guy and the guy who face revealed are two different people) - after which he showed up to our home basically unannounced and moved in with us, without giving us any choice.

Notice that this is also around the time that the DSMP wound down and eventually fell apart, and all of Dream's friends mysteriously quit the SMP and started their own thing. Also notice that he did post a picture of himself sampling merchandise (I think it was a hoodie?) and think: This is NOT the same person who did a face reveal. It's clear that the bodies and hands are totally different.

Also note: The voices in his old videos versus his new videos are totally different. He was using an audio filter to pitch down his voice and "disguise" it.

Within a week of him forcefully moving in with us, Clay began raping me. Despite my having told him that I was asexual and not interested in sex (which he said was fine), he barged into my room naked after I had gotten out of the shower and DEMANDED we had sex, and proceeded to threaten me until I complied. The bedroom was on a second story and he blocked the door. I had no exit and no way to defend myself.

This is how I spend the next ~ 6 months of my life. Hostage in my own home, not allowed to leave without his permission.

He was with us for about 6 months, all of which was spent threatening us with legal action, doxxing, financial crippling, emotional and physical abuse, and assault. We lost thousands of dollars trying to house him while he freeloaded off of myself and my partner - we're both disabled and my partner is actually dying from kidney failure.

He held the promise of money, housing, and even a working kidney over both our heads. It also turns out that he had freshly turned 19, and he admitted that his brother had lied on all of his paperwork to get him his license early. So I have no idea how old he really was.

He isolated both K and myself from nearly all of our friends, tried to isolate us from family, and even went as far as to bring cocaine into our house, despite asking him many times not to bring any illegal drugs in. (We literally live in a city where weed is totally legal and he had no problem stealing our weed and alcohol, so what the fuck)

After several severe psychotic breaks, we finally managed to kick Clay out - but not after months of being severely traumatized, abused and gaslit daily.

Three years later, this shit still haunts me. I will never be the same. In truth, the person who originally inhabited this body [Dave] underwent such severe psychological trauma that he/we/I developed acute DID, underwent several splits, and the original person completely vanished. I'm actually writing this as a totally different person now [Derek]. He still sends my partner and I threatening texts, his parking tickets and violations in the mail, etc.

As recently as a few weeks ago (today is 4.5.23) he was sending K harassing texts.

TLDR: I got raped and abused by Dream Minecraft after he was bought out and replaced.

Please don't harass the current Dream over this, as he has nothing to do with what Clay did.

Shit he did:

Raped me and K

Financially abused us

Stole possesssions from us

Attempted to hoard animals in our home

Brought cocaine into the house

Threatened us with physical violence and assault

Threatened us with emotional abuse

Threatened us with legal action

Threatened us with Mr. Beast and his Youtube Connections

Tried to Bribe us with youtube connections

Gaslit us

Outed a closeted trans friend to his entire friend group

Beat K with a door

Chased teenagers and threatened them

Pretended to pull a gun on people multiple times

Reckless driving and endangerment

Stole food, items, money and alcohol

Promised to help financially support us, only to financially cripple us

Held the promise of money, medical support and housing over two severely disabled people

Refused to let people sleep if he was Upset

Purposefully triggered us in order to get a reaction out of us so he could turn around and yell "abuse"

PHYSICALLY Held K hostage several times

Tried to get us to both elope with him separately

I've also since connected with quite a few of his ex-romantic partners and friends. They confirm and corroborate the fact that he exhibited the exact same behaviors with them.

Maybe one day I'll compile all the discord chats and texts and shit into a google drive and post it for the world to see, but considering now I'm basically completely physically and mentally incapacitated - today is not that day.

Reblog this, don't reblog this. Blow this up, don't blow this up.

I don't fucking care anymore - I've paid my dues for this. I just want it off of my chest and off of my mind.

If you still have me on discord, feel free to ask about it.

Otherwise, people I haven't spoken to in over a year, I'll be removing you within the week.

Best Wishes to everyone except Clay,

Derek.

[galvanizedfriend]

⭐️ for Gasoline and Spin! (two of my favs)

Gasoline is something that I started writing for a different fandom, about a billion years ago, and for some reason it suddenly gave me Klaroline vibes. I love a good musicians AU, so there's also that, and the idea of exploring a very messy side of Caroline and that relationship was something that enjoyed a lot. They're both extremely screwed up in the head in that setting, but Klaus fakes it better, while Caroline soldiers on by being extremely focused and disciplined, but she didn't get the clean cut she wishes she did, and it shows how much that affects her. I was originally going to write it as a long multi-chap, had the whole thing planned out. It was a bit of an ensemble story, where other characters would get their own development and so on, but I totally lost my mojo and then posted it as a one shot only, because I really liked that first chapter and I felt it worked anyway. But then @definedareasofuncertainty (she's behind everything, always lol) asked me to write a sequel and I decided to give it to her a birthday gift (I'm such a lame friend tbh 🥲), and so I had to include smut, because she's always calling me names for my fade to blacks 🥲

I like the open ending tbh, the idea that they can face the fact neither of them is completely happy and they have all this resentment for each other, but that there is no easy fix because they simply want different things from life. I was very particular about how I thought Klaus would be the ~~~softer part in this finale, because that's what he's like when he's with Caroline. He understands her needs, allows her to rage and scream, and always leaves the ball in her court. She's the one who makes the important moves. And so in that moment, he's just giving her what she needs, which is a closure of sorts and a promise that, maybe, further down the road, they'll finally be on the same page. It's all about timing and how bittersweet and heartbreaking it can be.

As for Spin - honestly, I love Spin. 😂 If I had to rec one of my fics to people, Spin would probably be top 3. I draw a lot of inspiration from my obsession of the day, and this was when I was watching The Politician like a mad person. The whole high school lovers to rivals had me by the throat (even though on the show it's actually very sad and depressing, in spire of the general insanity).

Again, it's an opportunity to have Klaus be a major little shit while also being a sucker for Caroline. I just think this story has so many aspects of them that I love. The bickering, the rivalry, the bitterness. The occasional betrayal. Klaus looking at Caroline like the sun shines out of her eyes, believing in her when everyone else just sort of roll their eyes. The Steroline relationship that is phony and convenient but lacking in everything. Klaus being propelled into impulsive, erratic behavior because of his family. The two of them finding a measure of comfort and understanding in each other, which is the last thing they could've expected.

I don't know, man, I just love them in this. 😂 Maybe it's just me, but I feel like it's a very well-rounded fic that adapts their dynamic well into a high school AU. I wish I could write more fics like that tbh.

[habibibasket]

MY YANDERE SIMULATOR CONCEPT

Gameplay and Visual Design Concepts

The base idea of Yandere Simulator is pretty strong! That's just to say that I enjoy it though, my opinions can be kinda shit but still! The idea of systematically going through and eliminating your romantic rivals sounds like a fun game concept, but issues arise when you ask "what genre of game?" Since the one we have now is OVERWHELMED with issues. There's too many little details and distractions, with many additions not really fleshing out the world and instead just making things feel overstuffed and tangential. There's so many things to look at and explore which almost all become null and void as the rival eliminations have strict time limits and days must be spent solely on those things, giving you little to no time to actually experience the extraneous details. Additionally, the specific elimination methods don't really allow for much experimentation with the various items and weapons around the school, especially the blunt object weapons like the pipe or the baseball bat. There's so many different elimination methods and ways of killing but many of those methods just feel far less useful if none of the 'cooler' ways are completely unviable and pointless to carry out, basically only having negative consequences if you try to experiment beyond the "schemes." The schemes is also pretty stupid idea in its own right basically preventing user experimentation entirely by providing such strict instructions for your plots that any experimentation just becomes null and void as a result. It just leaves things feeling hollow and unearned as a result.

Many of main issues I have with the gameplay and presentation is entirely to do with the format of the game, which, I believe, also contributes to the main struggles with development. Models, animations, and cutscenes are all either inhibited, slowed, or completely ruined by the presentation of the game. The post-processing, blurriness, and character models in particular make everything look less than ideal. This leads me to my point and my idea for what this kind of story is best suited for...

A Visual Novel

I may just have a bias for visual novels but I do believe that with the rework I'd want with the story, a visual novel would be the best option. I want to completely replan the story anyway but even the original concept could work as a visual novel with enough planning and writing power. I imagine it more as an Ace Attorney style visual novel with a time system implemented. You can move around to the notable locations in the school and look for specific items in each room. These items will be marked in the background, and can be found with the right means and the right information. Talking to people isn't required but can be helpful if you're looking for a specific tool or trying to plan out a murder plot or trying to get dirt on the particular rival.

Additionally, there's a game design concept I want to focus more on. The idea that throughout the game, it's a Ayano/Ayato's descent into madness from their crimes and actions. Sanity is less of a gameplay factor and more of a central story theme. Additionally this is shown best with the rivals and "rivals" you kill throughout. The real rivals being those who show an interest in Taro/Taeko and who they might have an interest in as well. This will be touched on more in the rival section, but the descent into simply killing people who happen to just be near them is something I want to have built up to over time as you kill more and more people who are seemingly of no "threat" whatsoever.

I'll cover a lot of that once we get to the story section but before that I want to address setting and design.

[blnk338]

I read Ghost's backstory just now. I knew it was f-ed up but damn... He should really have a lot more problems than just being emotionally unavailable. I'm kind of surprised he's opening up to Reaper or anyone at all (it's great he is though). What's your view on his mentality in general, based on his past trauma? What are his habits caused by it? And is his original backstory even a part of your fanfic? Sorry if you already answered this previously.

anon i am so glad you brought this up bc i could talk about this for eons <33333 mwah mwah -- yes, simon's backstory is canon is RWYS!

i am so sorry i wrote this much on this LMAO

cw for heavy trauma, sa mentions, abuse mentions, eating disorders, discussion of mental illness

I think more people need to put more effort into their fics or stories when writing trauma because I often see characters be one of two things:

They're tiny, sweet, pitiful babies who don't know anything and they're so little and small and they're not even adults or people anymore

They end up being their abuser.

Both are terrible options and unfortunately, as I said, they're shown way too often and really do not illustrate a lot of trauma reactions (of course there are examples of them, but I have not seen them as commonly). I take the writing of traumatized characters from my own experiences and from my own research (and literal human empathy, which appears to be void in half of the Ghost fics I read).

I think the idea of making Ghost quieter, closed off, a wall of a man is an accurate reaction to the shit that he has been through. He has a mountain of baggage and I think it's nearly impossible to write him without considering that. There's a clear idea that he limits who he trusts, and allows even fewer people to look under the layers that he's built up; but it makes complete sense that he has a conscious amount that he "lets people see" (even those he holds dear), until he breaks down.

A few of the responses that I think he has are avoidance and isolation, and the development of depression and anxiety disorders.

Simon blocks out a lot of the memories that he has and largely tries to avoid any conversations or thoughts on the subject of his sexual assault. Obviously, as an SAS soldier, it's hard to avoid certain topics, but I feel like he separates Ghost and Simon as two different people. It's common to find that people will put up different "faces" when it comes to responses to certain traumatic experiences, and I think it makes sense that Ghost would be willing to handle anything; he could be beaten, screamed at, watch and do terrifying things, handle himself well in the battlefield, but Simon can't.

Simon is scared. Simon is nervous, anxious, he overthinks things. He bites his nails and paces around his house, he has three locks on his door, he triple-checks the windows before he leaves for the day-- Simon isn't the stone-cold person that Ghost is, Simon is trying to relearn how to be a person who doesn't hide knives under every chair in his home. (Please also keep in mind that Simon's psychiatrist was also killed, I believe, in the midst of the murder of his family, so he would also limit the mental help he gets because of a fear that it might happen again)

Isolation makes complete sense because, as I mentioned before, he might see him and Ghost as different people. Simon doesn't go out of his way to ask for help, there's an incapability to do so. With that comes helplessness because he might not see the change he wants to see in himself. He's gotten back up from getting shot, he's taken hours of beating and torture, why can't he just get past this? All of these different sides of him build into depression and mass depressive episodes, paranoia and anxiety disorders, insomnia, etc.

Eating disorders may come with that; forgetting to eat or not going out enough to get groceries often. Restless, sleepless nights. Panic attacks that rise out of nowhere, he manages to push them down into staring off into space and clenching his fist, masking it on the job or in public. Hearing people's words but not listening, spending hours in his room on base, letting his anger out in the gym, sobbing into his pillow into the wee hours of the morning.

On top of that, he also refuses to let his anger out in any way that would hurt people like his father hurt them. Simon is careful about touching people, but is especially considerate of his anger. All he does is think, think, think, about how not to turn out like his dad. That's another thing I see people headcanon, that he would be physically abusive, and I don't see that at all. Ghost and Simon don't touch people because the last thing they want to do is end up like his father.

Tl;dr: Simon is very, very fucked up from his past and is still working through it.

[heepthecheep]

Nadya's uncle Rolf has slowly become one of my favorite characters to write about.

In an character development sense ((ie. Me making the actual character)) he's under gone a lot of changes. Originally he was a doormat compared to his much more forward wife, and his daughter was the original Hildegard who was called "Krumel" for some reason. Then he was divorced and didn't live with his daughter. Originally he was older than Olga, and they were Mendel's only children.

But gradually the story changed and ended up in a different place.

I feel like the best way to talk about him is to talk about the environment he grew up in.

Rolf's parents were a unique breed of terrible. Being the youngest, he often got shit from his older siblings, Eduard and Olga for being the favorite. As he grew older, he realized how awful his parents were, as did his siblings. Eduard learned to kiss up to his parents, Olga was constantly in trouble for being contrarian and Rolf...Rolf kept his head down and stayed quiet.

Eduard is chosen by the Doktorliga, much like his mother and father. Olga leaves Steinkirche entirely, and Rolf doesn't hear from her for 2 years. When he does, he's old enough to leave school and start working, but first he seeks out his sister. Olga has settled in Rahchau, and she's even gotten married! She's nice enough to let Rolf stay at her house until he gets settled into his new work-command.

Olga acts differently here then she did in the family home. She's nice? She isn't grumpy all the time? Why is she so sweet with Erwin, when previously she hated anyone and everyone who spoke with her ?

Rolf has a hazy idea, but now he's much more focused on what's going on in his life. Working. Camaraderie. Being allowed to have his own opinions. Ah, now Olga is going to have a baby, isn't that lovely?

And then Erwin dies in a work accident. Not an uncommon death, but still tragic. Olga invites him to move in and he helps with things around the house. His niece is born not long after, the little one Olga named Nadezhda, Nadya.

Nadya is a little darling. Rolf loves the little family he has, away from his parents and brother, even if there is a deep sadness surrounding everything. For five years, he's the happiest he's ever been, even if it is not always easy.

And then Olga dies. Suddenly Rolf is left alone with this five-year-old, he's only 20 himself, he has no idea what to do so he does the unthinkable. He goes back to Steinkirche, back to his parents, back to the people who might know what to do. He they both need to eat, so he needs to work, but he can't leave a greiving kindergartener alone all day.

His parents, predictably, want nothing to do with it. In fact, they think the both of them would be better off if Nadya was dead. At least she'd be with her parents again, and it's not like we want to help her. It's not like we want her anyway. It'd be easy, Eduard or Father can take care of it, just a quick injection and no one will have to be tied to a kid that no one wants.

Eduard knew his parents weren't nice, but it wasn't until that moment that he realized they were actively , maliciously evil. Screw that. He doesn't need them, he's never needed them. Nadya is his daughter now, regardless of what anyone else says. He'll take care of her even if he needs to quit his job and take up a shittier one. He'll move, again, to a place where he feels she can be safe.

He'll do whatever it takes, even if it ostracizes him from what's left of his family. None of it matters to him. He loved his sister and he will love her daughter as if she was his own, regardless of what happens.

[fluffmonger]

So.... Here's the thing. While I agree with the spirit of this post it's factually, just wrong, on multiple levels, and this isn't something that's hard to check either.

The original Baldur's Gate released in 1998, long after the height of the Satanic Panic, and before the Columbine Massacre, which shot off a new wave of Video Games are Evil moral panics. Mortal Kombat had released 6 years before, and Doom 5 years before. Demons, devils and dark themes in games weren't new or as shocking by then.

Adding to this, the game wasn't expected to sell well at all. BioWare was a tiny studio at that point, they'd only opened in 1995, which is when development began on Baldur's Gate. The team basically was learning how to develop and release games from scratch, while building an insanely complicated engine that could account for the sheer level of player choice inherently to DND. This was something that was *not* common in 1998, most games had one strict path through, or a handful of paths to choose from. Because of this, they deliberately chose to use more vanilla backgrounds and art to ease the process.

Additionally, 2e was a *very* different beast to 5e. Every option in BG is something that's permitted RAW in 2e, which was a very straightforward heroic fantasy focused story engine. Concepts of what was a hero were very clear cut, morally unambiguous. At the time, tieflings had only existed for ~4 years (and only one before development started). Other stuff just... Wasn't in the public consciousness. There wasn't any romance at all in the original, bc why would you play a fantasy hero game to simulate dating? Why would you go out of your way to diversify the world in text and such when it doesn't matter to the story, and the graphics are still rudimentary enough to allow imagination?

Which.... Of course that points to a lot of societal blind spots of the era and all of that. But at the end of the day, they also weren't expecting it to make any impact. So, there was nothing to stop them from making the game as wild as their imaginations allowed, and heck, they even got player feedback during the course of the relatively short development, which really endeared them to their player base. When it launched, it was *huge* overnight. If it hadn't been such a big hit, we'd never have gotten bg3. Part of the reason for the initial success *was* the DND license.

A year later, a different studio using the same engine released Planescape Torment, a crpg that has options for companions that include a tiefling, a succubus, a pyromaniac, a githerazi, an animated skull, a living suit of armor, and a little modron robot. Which is far far from the conservative naysaying and gloom...

Meanwhile, in the 25 years since that initial release, DND has had two edition updates that completely changed how the physical game is played, with more options and races and styles of play being included from the base game. Video games too, have been developing and changing, and culturally, socially a *lot* of shit has happened globally, so that the idea of a straightforward heroes good story seems... Trite at best. Video games have more and more expanded stories regularly, more choices, more options. Consoles have more power. The things that made the original Baldur's Gate so stunning back in the day, just aren't all that impressive on their own today. So, instead, the studio took the development time, and really dug in, and looked at how to make the game shine *story wise* instead of mechanically. Heck, even in Baldur's Gate 2, released 2 years after the first, the story gets more rich and complex, bc the studio wasn't also building an engine.

Times have changed. The culture is changing, people are changing, and getting better, more open and accepting all the time. DND lives, and thrives, and is being played in incredible new ways that reflect the new world, and will just keep getting better despite the.... Issues. Of the past that still haunt it.

But at the end of the day? Baldur's Gate 3 isn't some radical new take on how people play DND that's more true than Baldur's Gate 1... It's just an example of how the culture surrounding ttrpgs, and the way we engage them has changed in the last 25 years.

Jack Chick and the others wanted us to die... But Baldur's Gate as a franchise has always proved that we're here to stay, that progress and change can't be fought forever. People have always stood up for what's right, have always told interesting stories, and always fought against oppression and tyranny. Our present isn't magically just better than the past, all things have context

You know what, considering that DnD was bashed and rallied against for supposed promotion of demonology, homosexuality, violence, sex, witchcraft, etc. and this led to Baldur’s Gate 1 being pretty tame as far as story and characters go. I think it’s very fitting and poetic that Baldur’s Gate 3 is literally everything that the religious right in America fearmongered about in the 80s and 90s, and it’s absolutely great and compelling. If you showed an evangelical Christian from the 80s any character from Baldur’s Gate 3, they would combust into flames. To me, that’s why the game goes so hard in the thematic and stylistic directions it did because historically, all of these things got DnD bashed and censored. But now, nobody cares and people love it. Oh do times change.

Baldur’s Gate 3 is an victory lap for the DnD franchise because the culture war has moved so far past it that nobody has to walk on eggshells anymore to appease those types.

Jack Chick would implode at the mere existence of this game if he was alive today. And to me, that’s the beauty of Baldur’s Gate 3, it’s DnD saying “yeah we are everything you fearmongered about about and we gon sell a million plus copies while doing it” because in the end, DnD won the culture war against the people who wanted them gone.

[lightningarmour]

Star Trek the next-er generation part 2: the hologram

She enters the office of the ship's counsellor, and is caught off guard to see... another Romulan?! That can't be, surely she'd have known if there was another Romulan in Starfleet? Who are you, she asks, unable to mask her surprise. Oh, forgive me, says the counsellor, it's just that you're the first Romulan patient I've had, and it's a bit of a blind spot in my files. I find that typically, many people feel more comfortable speaking with members of their own species, so I thought this might help put you at ease, obviously I can see I was mistaken. The Counsellor then changes appearance to that of a human.

TNG made quite a few bold changes to the Star Trek formula when it began. Worf, a Klingon, the aliens who were the kind of arch nemeses of Starfleet in the original series, is a member of the crew! Data, a robot! Troi, the ship's therapist, and some kind of psychic alien!

Of the three, Data is most definitely the character who gets the lion's share of good material. Worf episodes are mostly dedicated to klingon politics, Troi episodes are mostly about her being bad at her job and also being the most useless psychic person in the galaxy. Or they're about her fucking mom.

Data is a much richer character with way more good episodes and character growth than either Worf or Troi are allowed to get(at least until Worf joins the cast of DS9) The crux of Data's character is the exploration of "can a machine be a person." Not the most original stuff, but done well, anyway. His attempts to become more human, his assertion of personhood, despite those who would claim he cannot be anything more than a machine an thus not truly alive.

Star Trek Voyager has it's own, largely reheated version of this same character archetype in the EMH. They really want him to embody the exact same set of ethical dilemmas and whatever as Data. Is he really a person? Does he have the right to exist, and what does existence even mean for an artificial lifeform and blah blah blah.

The difference is that Holograms, for the most part, in the TNG era of star trek are mostly depicted as simple computer constructs. Characters in stories, or simulations at best of real people. Yes, of course you have Moriarty who gained self awareness because Geordie foolishly told the computer to program a character that was smart enough to become self aware. Oopsie. And then there's Vic Fontaine, another hologram character that knows he's a hologram, but he's still a character, a host of sorts for a virtual recreational program. He starts to develop a sense of personhood after his holodeck program is left on for too long.

I personally don't really like this persistent elevation of holograms into sentient beings because it's a whole can of worms that really doesn't make any fucking sense if you dig through it for more than 10 seconds. So in voyager they get way too obsessed with this idea of holograms as people. The EMH starts lamenting the state of "hologram rights" and shit when, by all evidence there's an entirety of like 3 holograms that have ever been close to expressing self aware consciousness. But then you get the whole thing with Haven, the quaint little village full of Irish stereotypes who all start becoming aware that they are holograms in a fake construct after being left on too long.

It's like suggesting that if you fire up your PS5 and leave Grand theft auto 5 running for a week straight, all the NPC's in the game will suddenly become aware that they are programs in a video game and demanding that you treat them as citizens of the united states.

The thing is like, all of the dumb shit they do to suggest that holodeck characters are real people is never extended to say, the ship's computer. Like, it's what's creating all the hologram people, and it can perform complex functions and it even has a voice you can talk to! But nobody ever tries to argue that the ship is a person who deserves to be treated as an equal, probably because you can't fuck the ship. Holograms have faces and look like people so to the dipshit writers of Voyager, that means that they are people.

This is something I'd like to get away from. Especially with all the hysteria these days surrounding Artificial Intelligence. People have this completely overblown idea of what AI is and what it's capable of, probably thanks in large part to movies, so I think it would honestly be more interesting to have a computer character who actually behaves more like a computer program would. They perform a specific set of functions as dictated by Their programming. Let's not try just making Data over and over again.

I also don't inherently dislike the idea of the EMH. But once you consider, okay a hologram in the infirmary that can lend a hand in emergency situations, well, why not have one of those in Engineering so that when a power conduit explodes in an engineer's face, you can pop a hologram over there to fix the problem with zero danger. In fact why not just replace the entire crew with holograms? Like I said it's a can of worms.

I also like the idea of Troi. Sadly, they never knew what the hell to do with her so she got a bad deal as a character. In space, a lot of really weird, really traumatizing bullshit happens all the damn time. So it would make total sense to have like, a therapist on the ship to make sure people aren't permanently fucked up from all the insane situations they go through in Starfleet. Troi, however, was never depicted as being particularly effective or useful in the role of ship psychiatrist. I can think of at least two instances where she full on just gives her patients terrible advice, and most of her episodes revolve around her having personal issues that she has to like, turn to Guinan for guidance on. Honestly, Guinan helps more people with their problems throughout that show than Troi ever does. Also, Troi has too many personal relationships with a lot of the main cast to the point where I don't think she'd be a very objective party if they had to speak with her professionally. Also is she the only therapist meant to treat a crew of like 300 people? Does she have her own shrink she sees?

So my thought was, what if you mash these two ideas together? Ship's counsellor who is a hologram. It has access to service records and psyche profile of every crew member, it's programmed with like, all the knowledge of the leading research and whatever in the field of psychology and whatnot that the federation has access to. And it's office is a mini-holodeck so it can adjust not only the decor or the scenerey but it's own appearance so it can present the most comforting setting for people to speak about their problems.

From a sort of meta, production standpoint I also think it could just be a really fun character that you could approach two ways. 1. get different actors to play the Counsellor depending on what appearance they are taking. 2. Have one actor play the Counsellor and dress them up in different makeup and costumes for each appearance change they do. That could be a really cool role for a talented actor. I think of all the different hats Brent Spiner got to wear as Data in TNG and I feel like it would be cool to have another person like that in Star Trek again.

Computer, end program, she says. The Counsellor gives a short smile, apologetic. I'm afraid only the Captain has the authority to shut down my program, in the case of emergency. I wouldn't make a very good doctor if you could just turn me off when you don't feel like talking. Of course we can end our session at any time if you don't feel comfortable, though I'm afraid I do need to clear you for duty before you can officially join the crew, so maybe you wouldn't mind talking with me for a bit? She eyes the hologram skeptically. How do I know this is confidential? For all I know, everything in this room is being recorded and sent back to Starfleet intelligence. Do you worry that Starfleet can't be trusted? Perhaps we can try and ease your sense of mistrust if we talk for a bit. Why don't you tell me a little bit about the field of psychology in Romulan society, I'm afraid it's a bit of a blind spot in my database

Of course, the Counsellor wouldn't only be interacting with our Romulan character. Part of the fun would be giving them a kind of unique persona for each different member of the crew you see interacting with them. It could be a kind of interesting framing device for episodes where you have various crew members recounting events of missions and shit, and to get nice little expository scenes about their lives and shit.

There's one character in particular that both the Romulan officer and the Counsellor would have an interesting relationships with. For the Counsellor, he's a difficult patient to work with because oh boy does he have a lot of baggage to sort through and he doesn't particularly like discussing some of the more... complicated parts of his life.

For the Romulan Officer though, he's possibly the only member of the crew who doesn't look at her funny or whisper about her behind her back. He gives her the full respect he'd afford to anyone else onboard the ship. He'd say that when he was a kid, he grew up onboard the ship with the distinction of having the first Klingon member of Starfleet, and he had such a great time learning from Worf about Klingon culture, and isn't that what Starfleet is all about? Travelling to new worlds and meeting new people and sharing our knowledge with each other in the name of progress and camaraderie?

Yes, that's right folks, it's none other than Commander Wesley Crusher!

To be continued???

[fozmeadows]

race & culture in fandom

For the past decade, English language fanwriting culture post the days of LiveJournal and Strikethrough has been hugely shaped by a handful of megafandoms that exploded across AO3 and tumblr – I’m talking Supernatural, Teen Wolf, Dr Who, the MCU, Harry Potter, Star Wars, BBC Sherlock – which have all been overwhelmingly white. I don’t mean in terms of the fans themselves, although whiteness also figures prominently in said fandoms: I mean that the source materials themselves feature very few POC, and the ones who are there tended to be done dirty by the creators.

Periodically, this has led POC in fandom to point out, extremely reasonably, that even where non-white characters do get central roles in various media properties, they’re often overlooked by fandom at large, such that the popular focus stays primarily on the white characters. Sometimes this happened (it was argued) because the POC characters were secondary to begin with and as such attracted less fan devotion (although this has never stopped fandoms from picking a random white gremlin from the background cast and elevating them to the status of Fave); at other times, however, there has been a clear trend of sidelining POC leads in favour of white alternatives (as per Finn, Poe and Rose Tico being edged out in Star Wars shipping by Hux, Kylo and Rey). I mention this, not to demonize individuals whose preferred ships happen to involve white characters, but to point out the collective impact these trends can have on POC in fandom spaces: it’s not bad to ship what you ship, but that doesn’t mean there’s no utility in analysing what’s popular and why through a racial lens.

All this being so, it feels increasingly salient that fanwriting culture as exists right now developed under the influence and in the shadow of these white-dominated fandoms – specifically, the taboo against criticizing or critiquing fics for any reason. Certainly, there’s a hell of a lot of value to Don’t Like, Don’t Read as a general policy, especially when it comes to the darker, kinkier side of ficwriting, and whether the context is professional or recreational, offering someone direct, unsolicited feedback on their writing style is a dick move. But on the flipside, the anti-criticism culture in fanwriting has consistently worked against fans of colour who speak out about racist tropes, fan ignorance and hurtful portrayals of living cultures. Voicing anything negative about works created for free is seen as violating a core rule of ficwriting culture – but as that culture has been foundationally shaped by white fandoms, white characters and, overwhelmingly, white ideas about what’s allowed and what isn’t, we ought to consider that all critical contexts are not created equal.

Right now, the rise of C-drama (and K-drama, and J-drama) fandoms is seeing a surge of white creators – myself included – writing fics for fandoms in which no white people exist, and where the cultural context which informs the canon is different to western norms. Which isn’t to say that no popular fandoms focused on POC have existed before now – K-pop RPF and anime fandoms, for example, have been big for a while. But with the success of The Untamed, more western fans are investing in stories whose plots, references, characterization and settings are so fundamentally rooted in real Chinese history and living Chinese culture that it’s not really possible to write around it. And yet, inevitably, too many in fandom are trying to do just that, treating respect for Chinese culture or an attempt to understand it as optional extras – because surely, fandom shouldn’t feel like work. If you’re writing something for free, on your own time, for your own pleasure, why should anyone else get to demand that you research the subject matter first?

Because it matters, is the short answer. Because race and culture are not made-up things like lightsabers and werewolves that you can alter, mock or misunderstand without the risk of hurting or marginalizing actual real people – and because, quite frankly, we already know that fandom is capable of drawing lines in the sand where it chooses. When Brony culture first reared its head (hah), the online fandom for My Little Pony – which, like the other fandoms we’re discussing here, is overwhelmingly female – was initially welcoming. It felt like progress, that so many straight men could identify with such a feminine show; a potential sign that maybe, we were finally leaving the era of mainstream hypermasculine fandom bullshit behind, at least in this one arena. And then, in pretty much the blink of an eye, things got overwhelmingly bad. Artists drawing hardcorn porn didn’t tag their works as adult, leading to those images flooding the public search results for a children’s show. Women were edged out of their own spaces. Bronies got aggressive, posting harsh, ugly criticism of artists whose gijinka interpretations of the Mane Six as humans were deemed insufficiently fuckable.

The resulting fandom conflict was deeply unpleasant, but in the end, the verdict was laid down loud and clear: if you cannot comport yourself like a decent fucking person – if your base mode of engagement within a fandom is to coopt it from the original audience and declare it newly cool only because you’re into it now; if you do not, at the very least, attempt to understand and respect the original context so as to engage appropriately (in this case, by acknowledging that the media you’re consuming was foundational to many women who were there before you and is still consumed by minors, and tagging your goddamn porn) – then the rest of fandom will treat you like a social biohazard, and rightly so.

Here’s the thing, fellow white people: when it comes to C-drama fandoms and other non-white, non-western properties? We are the Bronies.

Not, I hasten to add, in terms of toxic fuckery – though if we don’t get our collective shit together, I’m not taking that darkest timeline off the table. What I mean is that, by virtue of the whiteminding which, both consciously and unconsciously, has shaped current fan culture, particularly in terms of ficwriting conventions, we’re collectively acting as though we’re the primary audience for narratives that weren’t actually made with us in mind, being hostile dicks to Chinese and Chinese diaspora fans when they take the time to point out what we’re getting wrong. We’re bristling because we’ve conceived of ficwriting as a place wherein No Criticism Occurs without questioning how this culture, while valuable in some respects, also serves to uphold, excuse and perpetuate microaggresions and other forms of racism, lashing out or falling back on passive aggression when POC, quite understandably, talk about how they’re sick and tired of our bullshit.

An analogy: one of the most helpful and important tags on AO3 is the one for homophobia, not just because it allows readers to brace for or opt out of reading content they might find distressing, but because it lets the reader know that the writer knows what homophobia is, and is employing it deliberately. When this concept is tagged, I – like many others – often feel more able to read about it than I do when it crops up in untagged works of commercial fiction, film or TV, because I don’t have to worry that the author thinks what they’re depicting is okay. I can say definitively, “yes, the author knows this is messed up, but has elected to tell a messed up story, a fact that will be obvious to anyone who reads this,” instead of worrying that someone will see a fucked up story blind and think “oh, I guess that’s fine.” The contextual framing matters, is the point – which is why it’s so jarring and unpleasant on those rare occasions when I do stumble on a fic whose author has legitimately mistaken homophobic microaggressions for cute banter. This is why, in a ficwriting culture that otherwise aggressively dislikes criticism, the request to tag for a certain thing – while still sometimes fraught – is generally permitted: it helps everyone to have a good time and to curate their fan experience appropriately.

But when white and/or western fans fail to educate ourselves about race, culture and the history of other countries and proceed to deploy that ignorance in our writing, we’re not tagging for racism as a thing we’ve explored deliberately; we’re just being ignorant at best and hateful at worst, which means fans of colour don’t know to avoid or brace for the content of those works until they get hit in the face with microaggresions and/or outright racism. Instead, the burden is placed on them to navigate a minefield not of their creation: which fans can be trusted to write respectfully? Who, if they make an error, will listen and apologise if the error is explained? Who, if lived experience, personal translations or cultural insights are shared, can be counted on to acknowledge those contributions rather than taking sole credit? Too often, fans of colour are being made to feel like guests in their own house, while white fans act like a tone-policing HOA.

Point being: fandom and ficwriting cultures as they currently exist badly need to confront the implicit acceptance of racism and cultural bias that underlies a lot of community rules about engagement and criticism, and that needs to start with white and western fans. We don’t want to be the new Bronies, guys. We need to do better.  

[evesaintyves]

I really disagree with the post about Teddy. You really think he’d be mad at his parents for not staying at home while all their friends and fellow Order members go and give their lives for the future of their world? Especially when he grows up around Harry and the rest. Children fought and died but they shouldn’t have because they had him? I actually hate the whole Lupin asking Tonks to stay at home. They met as part of the Order, and she was an auror. Becoming a mother doesn’t change that.

hi anon! i'm sorry you felt you had to send this anonymously, because i'd be happy to have this conversation with you in a way that isn't quite so one-sided.

first, let me make something clear: i'm fine with whatever your take on Teddy Lupin's psychology is. i am 100% not interested in pinning down some kind of absolute truth about Teddy, Tonks, Lupin, or any other character. i think that's a limiting approach to writing about people. human behavior is a complex, multifactorial, emergent process that's sometimes difficult to predict or explain. this is one reason why i rarely post or talk about "headcanons" - i'm open to the idea of multiple, even contradictory, interpretations that are equally valid, equally compatible with the information available in canon.

my interest in is storytelling. i want to read and write stories about what it's like to be a person. all these characters - especially remadora and teddy, about whom there is limited and sometimes unreliable information in canon - are full of possibilities and opportunities for extrapolating what we do know about them into a story about what being human was like for them.

being angry with your parents for doing things they thought were entirely justifiable at the time is, for many people, an aspect of the human condition.

but let's talk specifics. the truth is that we don't know, canonically, how teddy lupin feels about being orphaned. to me, that means it's fair game for all kinds of interpretations. now, i did not write the original post (gonna tag @jilylicious to chime in on this if they want since it's their work and i'm sure they have their own ideas) but i'd like to address your points and tell you why i think it's a perfectly valid interpretation of Teddy and his relationship with his parents' memory.

You really think he’d be mad at his parents for not staying at home while all their friends and fellow Order members go and give their lives for the future of their world?

sure, why not? Teddy isn't a Remadora fan on tumblr, he isn't necessarily familiar with and sympathetic to his parents' story in the way we are. he's a kid who has to come to terms with the fact that his parents left him with his grandma as a tiny baby and went to fight in a battle that killed them. that's fucking unfair to him. he's allowed to feel all kinds of ways about that.

what do we think an abstract concept like "the future of their world" means to teddy? as a young child, probably not much, right? the capacity to even understand something like that - as a vague abstraction mostly concerning the well-being of a bunch of other people - probably wouldn't even develop in teddy until at least around the time he went to hogwarts (and i am not about to make this shit even longer by citing child development theories, but you're welcome to look it up). meanwhile, his whole childhood, he's dealing with the consequences of his parents' choice, forming an identity that includes "my parents left me with my grandmother one night so they could fight in a war and never came back," and probably developing all kind of feelings about that, right? abandonment, whatever the circumstances and mechanics behind it, is hard on kids and has knock-on effects that can be lifelong: issues with trust and attachment to other people, feelings of worthlessness, fear of intimacy and commitment. those things can be forged in early childhood and it's not as simple as being talked out of them with some explanation of why it had to be that way.

is Teddy's life actually even better than if his parents hadn't gone off to die? maybe. Teddy might or might not feel that it is. we don't really have any evidence that Lupin and Tonks's participation in the battle had much of an effect on the outcome. one or both of them might have stayed home and the battle might have been won anyway and he'd be chilling with them right now. the idea of his life if the battle had been lost is another abstraction based on political and social developments that mostly happened before he was born. understandable for young Teddy, and even adult Teddy, not to really grasp all the could-have-beens there. even with the war won, Teddy may have grown up experiencing the social stigma of being the child of a famous werewolf who's not even around to help him through it. reasonable and okay to be angry about that, and understandable to still resent your parents for putting you in that situation even if you agree that it had to be that way.

i would argue that, however childlike, irrational, or self-absorbed Teddy's early feelings about his own trauma are, they're probably going to inform his ideas about his parents for a long time. like, have you come to a rational, all-perspectives understanding of all the ideas you developed in childhood? about your earliest sense that life was unfair? i don't think everyone does, at least not without a lot of difficult work. maybe he comes to a fuller understanding later in life. maybe he decides that he agrees that it had to happen but he is still plagued by this anger and hurt that won't be argued with. i think this is a pretty relatable idea. things can be true but not feel true. things can make sense but you're still sad and mad about them.

Especially when he grows up around Harry and the rest.

he does grow up around Harry! and Harry lost his parents too, so maybe he's in a unique position to counsel teddy about that - but Harry's situation is markedly different from Teddy's, isn't it?

Harry's parents went into hiding as a family to protect him. they didn't leave him with a relative in a safe house and carry on with their Order duties. James didn't send Lily into hiding with Harry while he kept fighting. the fact that they stood their ground together and died there to protect him is central not just to Harry's story but to the entire HP universe.

how might Teddy feel about the differences between their two stories? maybe fine. maybe it wouldn't even occur to him. maybe he'd feel cheated and abandoned by his parents who left him and went off to fight instead - yes, Teddy was one reason they felt they had to fight, but might Teddy not see it as them going to lay their lives down for Harry and for a cause? imagine how that might inform the way he feels about Harry. Teddy isn't required, especially as a kid, to think about this in a way that we feel is rational or sympathetic to his parents.

even if Harry does his best to present the story to Teddy in a way that's sympathetic to Teddy and his parents, Harry probably isn't the only source from which Teddy is going to hear this stuff. it's gonna be in history books, periodicals, fictionalized retellings, everyone's personal Where Were You On May 2nd story - and those accounts are likely to frame what happened as a bunch of people dying for Harry Potter and the fate of the wizarding world. not Teddy being able to live a happier life. that might be difficult for a kid to grapple with, no?

finally, Harry didn't raise Teddy. Andromeda Tonks did. how do you imagine SHE feels about what Teddy's parents did? what Lupin did? she might very well have seen leaving to fight in the battle as another attempt by Lupin to go redeem himself with a hero's death instead of facing his responsibility for Tonks and Teddy (and, honestly, i think that's a possibility worth exploring in fiction about Lupin and his motivations). how might that have filtered down to Teddy and his understanding of his parents? Andromeda is grieving while she raises her orphaned grandbaby, and i bet she has her own anger and resentment and despair to deal with there - that's understandable whether you agree with her conclusions or not. it's not hard to imagine Teddy overhearing some bitter asides from Andromeda, or picking up on the tension when she answers his questions about his parents.

Children fought and died but they shouldn’t have because they had him?

i mean, you're not going to catch me arguing that children should have died instead of Lupin and Tonks. i have mixed feelings about the choice they made that could be its own whole long post, but they're irrelevant here.

Teddy doesn't have to feel that way to be mad that his parents left him to go die. he also doesn't really have to give a shit about those long-dead children - another possibly hard-to-understand abstraction. he doesn't even have to think his parents should have stayed in order to be justifiably angry that they left! even if Teddy agrees they had no choice he can still be fucking pissed off at them! the dissonance between these ideas is probably pretty distressing, in fact!

feelings are like that sometimes. relationships with parents are like that sometimes. grief and feelings of abandonment don't always listen to logical arguments. that's what makes this take interesting and relatable, to me. being a person is fucking messy as shit. i'm sure there's an interesting story to be told about Teddy... being fine with his parents' deaths or whatever, but it's not any more representative of the spectrum of human emotions and trauma responses than the ideas the OP wrote about Teddy.

I actually hate the whole Lupin asking Tonks to stay at home. They met as part of the Order, and she was an auror. Becoming a mother doesn’t change that.

i think that's valid! i totally understand it. i think the way the situation was written reveals a lot about JKR's ideas about gender roles and parenting. i have different ideas about those things, which is at least partially down to the generation i belong to and my status as a queer person and a non-parent. i also really like interpretations of Tonks as a soldier who's as committed to the cause as any of her male contemporaries.

but this is one of those times where, you know, there isn't necessarily a wrong answer. just to play the devils advocate, i could argue that Lupin asking Tonks to stay makes as much sense in-universe as any alternative interpretation: we're we're talking about two people in a pretty heteronormatively-written universe set in the 1990s. Lupin was born in the 60s and might have had the same kind of internalized sexist background noise as, you know, everybody else. Tonks already, canonically, put her career on the line by marrying Lupin and having his baby. they've both been hiding from the fighting for most of her pregnancy. (which, if you want to go down a rabbit hole, might be another reason for Teddy not to understand their choice - it was okay to abstain from the world-bettering while he was a fetus but once he was born they changed their minds?) if one of them is going to stay and be the surviving parent of a three-week-old baby i guess it might as well be the one that's breastfeeding him. we don't get to see a lot of Tonks being an auror and resistance fighter or hear a lot of her feelings about it in canon, especially after Teddy is conceived. whatever we may surmise about her identity as an auror vs her identity as a mother and all the other factors that would play into how that situation went down - it's just surmising, it's subjective interpretation, and there are so many different storytelling paths to follow from it!

maybe you should write an AU where that conversation goes down differently, or a post-war Tonks-in-wizard-heaven monologue about how she felt about it, or just a gritty breakdown of how it might have actually happened in the light of your thoughts about Tonks's character! if you disagree with all of my conjecture here, maybe you should write a deep dive into Teddy's process of grieving and understanding his parents! fascinating! this is what i mean when i say it's not about the truth, it's about storytelling: there is so much more art and wonder and discovery in exploring all these possibilities than in haggling over which possibility is Correct.

Edit: read the original anon's very thoughtful responses here:

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