#the only good person left is that one kid who made videos about pretending to be president and like maybe Hozier

[pinkeos]

Dad!Aventurine Headcanons

Warning/s: None and reader's gender isn't mentioned, whether the child is adopted or your own is up to you

Notes: I wish I had a dad🧍 /j

im fully convinced aventurine is a girl dad and it's hard to convince me otherwise

with his job, dad!aven couldn't spend that much time with his little girl as much as he wanted, the days where he wasn't needed to leave for different planets were far and between

and when he leaves, it takes weeks to months before he comes home despite trying his very best to finish his assignment quickly so, even though he knows it won't exactly be comparable to his presence in his daughter’s life, he sends gifts and toys. whatever she wanted, he’d give it to her

dad!aven would often call you when he's away, face timing to see and talk to you and your daughter. it'd send a pang of guilt and pain in his heart to see the frown and the tears she held back whenever he said he wouldn't be home yet

he’d be the type to rewatch the videos you’d send of you and your kid just enjoying your days whenever he misses you both, a smile on his face as he grows more determined to finish his work to come home to you

he loves his family, and treats you two as his most precious treasures, more precious than anything else in the galaxy. you’re the only ones he has left, after all. he thought his luck had ran out when you and your daughter entered his life, because he couldn't get any luckier

but whenever the man’s home, oh boy does the house get so lively

dad!aven would go along with his daughter’s wishes, doing whatever she wanted so you often had to help your husband wipe the thick make up off of his face that your daughter applied on him when they played

you remember walking in on them having a pretend tea party where they gossiped about the other ‘guests’ which were her plushies, he looked like he was enjoying it more than your daughter

they'd make bracelets together, and he'd proudly wear the bracelet his daughter made for him even though the colors didn't really look that good together or with his outfit. in his eyes, it was perfect and he'd bring it up to whoever he was talking to at work even though no one asked

dad!aven would be the type to sneak sweets for your daughter even though you told him not to because dinner was almost done, he was a victim to your daughter’s puppy eyes and pout

he once spent a day out to bond with his daughter, insisting you go and rest and have some you time while he takes care of your daughter. you later found out he took her to the casino, and the way you scolded their ears off after made him remind himself not to do it again

dad!aven was an entirely different person than the aventurine of the ten stonehearts. he was but a loving father that treasured both you and his daughter

“daddy, move! you’re heavy!” your daughter whined as she tried to push her father who was leaning against her on the couch as they waited for you to finish preparing for the day out

aventurine dramatically gasped, looking down at his daughter with a faux offended look, “do you not want my love and affection anymore?”

the child, who genuinely thought she hurt her father's feelings, stammered, “n-no!”

“‘no’?” he echoed, his acting skills quite helpful when teasing his little girl as he looked away, sniffing as if he was actually crying

“i-i mean!” she stood on the couch, wrapping her short arms around his shoulders, “i still want daddy’s hugs! even when im older! i don't want you to leave again!”

his teasing might've gotten a bit too far when she began to sob, aventurine internally panicked as he embraced her, rubbing her back, “hey now, daddy was just teasing.”

“why is our little girl crying, kakavasha?”

the moment he heard your voice, he knew he was done for

[magicalmysteries777]

"You're clueless, you know that?" - Reader x Eddie Munson & Reader x Steve Harrington (fake)

Summary: You agree to accompany Steve to Enzo's for Valentine's Day with only one shared goal in mind - to make Eddie so jealous he has no choice but to have the one conversation he's being avoiding.

Pairings: F!Reader x Steve Harrington & F!Reader x Eddie Munson.

Chapter: 1 of 1.

W/C: 2314.

A/N: Happy Valentines Day, besties! This trope paired with Steve and Eddie has had me in a chokehold for a while now and I'm so happy that the lil ADHD gremlin in my brain has finally let me write the damn thing. <3

This one-shot can also be found on AO3 here.

“You really think that’ll work? Pretending to go on a date with you?” you asked, leaning against the counter at Family Video.

“It better work. Personally, I’m sick of hearing you pine over him. He’s had a thing for you ever since you joined Hellfire but he’s completely clueless when it comes to all the hints you’ve dropped,” Robin chimed in without looking up from the ‘returns’ pile of videotapes she was sorting through.

Clueless didn’t even begin to cut it.

You’d known about Eddie’s crush on you for months now, ever since Dustin slipped up and spilled the beans at lunch one day. The poor kid made you swear on your own life that you wouldn’t tell Eddie you knew.

True to your word, you kept the secret and began dropping hints instead. Eddie couldn’t read the room to save his life.

Any time you caught him staring, he’d break eye contact before you could smile back at him. Any time your hands accidentally touched, he’d move his hand away and play it off if you didn’t keep your hand perfectly still.

“I think it’s perfect,” Steve smiled. “There’s nothing like a bit of jealously to make you realise what you want.”

“I dunno,” you mumbled, chewing your cheek while you weighed up your options.

“When he sees you all dolled up, thinking it’s for me, the dots will connect. Trust me.”

“Fine, I’ll find out when he’s working.”

-

Steve’s plan had been in the back of your mind the whole time you’d been sitting around the table with your fellow Hellfire members. It was a long game of highs and lows all night. Despite the distraction, you’d manage to come out of the battle victorious with a mere five health points left. The party, albeit a little bruised and battered, was one step closer to defeating Myrkul and Eddie was in a good mood.

It took the usual fifteen minutes to pack up Eddie’s maps, dice, tokens, and other various game pieces before you climbed into the passenger side of his van. “Sorry for the mess,” Eddie apologised.

“You say that every week and yet you never clean it.”

“I do, it just gets messy again,” he smirked.

You were halfway home when you glanced over at Eddie. His hair was frizzy, sticking up in places from all the near misses in battle where he’d had his hands running through it. The rings on his left hand were glowing gently from the reflection of his lit cigarette as he used it to control the steering wheel. His right hand was methodically fiddling with the busted cassette player that he’d been meaning to fix for months. As always when Eddie was concentrating, his tongue was sticking out and resting against his top lip.

“Got it!” he exclaimed as Rainbow in the Dark started blasting from the speaker, a huge grin spread across his face.

“When are you going to buy a new one?” you chuckled, prodding at the battered box.

“Stop touching it,” he slapped your hand away. “It’ll start crackling again. I’ve picked up some overtime next weekend, I’m hoping the gents will be tipping big to impress their dates.”

“No Valentine’s plan with anyone special then?”

“Nope, just work. Doubt there’s anyone out there who would want to spend their Valentine’s Day with the ‘Freak of Hawkins’ anyway.”

“You’d be surprised, some people like their men a little freaky.”

“What about you? Any plans?” he asked, the change in tone rather subtle.

For a moment, you weren’t sure if you were going to go through with the plan. Steve’s words echoed through your mind listed the pros and cons. ‘Trust me.’

“Yeah, I’ve got a date at Enzo's. At least I don’t have to worry about it going bad now if you’re working, you can come over and scare him off for me.”

“That’s great. Wow, a date. Um, yeah, I’ll fend him off for you if things go pear-shaped. Do I, uh, know the guy?” he stuttered.

“I don’t want to jinx it,” you answered, remembering Robin's claims that a little bit of mystery would be the key to the whole plan working.

“Of course,” Eddie agreed, a sarcastically dumb look plastered on his face. You couldn’t help but notice that this was exactly how he used to act when Dustin mentioned Steve. “Would you look at that? Here we are. Once again, dropped off in one piece, as requested.”

“You okay, Ed?” you ask, one eyebrow raised.

“Yep. Fine. Tired,” he mumbled through an unconvincing yawn. “Long game. I’m gonna go and, uh, get some sleep. Night.”

-

“And he said it exactly like that?” Steve asked.

“Yes, Steve, how many times do I have to go through it? He basically kicked me out of the van,” you answered.

“It’s definitely working.”

“Are you sure?”

“One hundred percent. Wait until he finds out it’s me, he’s gonna freak.”

“He might not react at all. Believe it or not, he is professional at work.”

“Bet on it?”

“Shut up.”

-

Eddie had been an asshole all week.

Jeff and Gareth got the worst of it. You, however, had been getting the silent treatment. It was Thursday lunchtime when Eddie finally acknowledged you again.

“So, what are your plans this weekend?” Dustin asked Mike.

“Movies with El then dinner, you?”

“Arcade with Will. What about you, Eddie?”

“Work and band, why?”

“It’s called small talk,” Dustin answered. “What is with you this week?”

“Nothing, I’m fine,” he snapped.

“Tell your face that, man,” added Jeff.

“Lay off it. Why don’t you ask her what she’s doing this weekend instead and leave me alone?” Eddie prompted, gesturing in your direction. He did not stick around to hear the answer, walking away dramatically.

“Well, what are you doing?” asked Dustin.

“I’ve got a date,” you answered quickly and quietly, sinking into your seat as a sense of guilt began to creep up on you.

“You what?!” asked Gareth.

“I said I’ve got a date.”

“Yeah, I heard you. The fuck do you mean you’ve got a date? With who?”

“Does it matter?” you ask asked.

“Evidently it does. I’ve been taking the brunt of his crap all week and you’re telling me it’s because you’re going on a date?”

“How was I supposed to know he’d react like this?” you quickly try to defend yourself.

“Are you blind?” Jeff asks.

“No, but he is. I’ve dropped hints. Lots of them. If he doesn’t want to acknowledge it then that’s on him.”

-

“Wow,” smiled Steve, looking you up and down. He took your hand, albeit rather dramatically, and began leading you to the car.

“Save it for the restaurant, you dingus. Does this look okay then?” you ask.

“The dress alone might kill him, never mind the heels and hair.”

Ten minutes later, Steve parked up outside Enzo's.

“When we get in there, sit with your back to the bar. You’re about to get the full Harrington charm, okay?” he asked.

“Got it.”

“Hi there, table for two under Harrington,” Steve told the hostess.

“Follow me.”

“Here we are,” the hostess said as she gestured to a small table. “Here are your menus, the waiter will be over to take your order shortly.”

“Thank you,” you replied, taking the seat that Steve had pulled out for you.

“So,” you began.

“So,” Steve replied with a grin.

“I’m not going to lie, Steve, I feel really awkward.”

“I can tell,” he responded. “Relax. We’re just two friends, dressed up, and having a nice meal. Loosen up a little and have fun, or this isn’t going to work.”

You tried to relax, really, you did. But you couldn’t help shake the feeling that Eddie was burning holes into the back of your head with his staring.

“Welcome to Enzo's, my name is Ruben and I’ll be your server this evening. Any drinks to start?”

“Sparkling water for me, and…” Steve prompted.

“Lemonade, please.”

“Awesome, I’ll get that put in at the bar for you. Any starters today?”

“Do you-” Steve began, turning his attention back to you.

“More of a dessert person,” you answer.

“Me too,” smiled Ruben. “What mains would you like?”

“Lasagne for me, please,” answered Steve.

“Chicken Alfredo, please.”

“Awesome. I’ll get all that put in for you, enjoy your evening.”

“Thank you, ‘preciate that,” Steve told him before he left the table.

After a couple of minutes of the usual “how was work?” and “how was school?” small talk, Steve’s gaze quickly shot behind you as he sat up a little bit straighter.

“Here’s your lemonade,” Eddie announced, placing the glass down in front of you.

“Thanks, Eddie. How’s your shift?” you asked with a smile.

“So-so. Started going downhill about twenty minutes ago,” he answered.

“Nothing worse than a shitty Friday shift,” Steve chimed in.

“Evening rush,” Eddie responded, unwilling to meet Steve’s gaze. “Everything okay over here?”

“Great, thank you,” you respond.

“Harrington,” Eddie muttered, placing Steve’s water in front of him with a little bit more force than he did the lemonade, before heading back to the bar.

“He won’t even look at me, this is working even better than I thought,” Steve chuckled.

-

One hour and one chicken alfredo later, Ruben returned.

“Well you two are looking cosy over here,” he told you. Steve had been giving you cues on how to sit and when to laugh all evening. “How about that dessert? I highly recommend the ‘brownie and ice cream for two.’ Chef special tonight.”

“Sounds perfect,” answered Steve.

“Alrighty, that’ll be about ten to fifteen minutes. Any more drinks?”

“The same again, please,” you answer.

A couple of minutes later, Steve gave another instruction.

“Rest your left arm on the table.”

“What?”

“Now.”

Steve let out a sudden laugh and adjusted himself in his seat. He placed his arm on the table, his fingertips slightly brushing against your own.

A loud crashing noise from behind you had heads rolling to see what was going on. Every pair of eyes in the restaurant landed on Eddie.

“Sorry folks,” he announced. Eddie quickly began picking up the larger shards of glass whilst another bartender brought over cloths and a broom.

“Hook, line, and sinker,” Steve whispered, loud enough for only you to hear.

-

You really were getting the full Harrington charm, as promised. Steve had been feeding you brownie on and off for ten minutes, his glancing over to Eddie quickly now and again.

“It’s almost time,” Steve whispered.

“Time for what?”

“The grand finale.”

Steve leaned in slightly and wiped the side of your mouth gently with his thumb. “Ice cream,” he smirked.

“Is that really necessary?”

“One hundred percent. On my cue, you’re going to excuse yourself to go to the bathroom,” he began.

“But-”

“If this whole fake date has gone to plan, which by the way has been lovely, then I do believe Munson won’t let you make it that far. Go now.”

As instructed, you excused yourself from the table and made your way towards the bathroom. Just as you got to the door you felt a hand close softly around your wrist.

“Hey, can we talk?” Eddie asked.

“Everything okay?”

“No, actually, it’s not,” he answered. Eddie glanced around before pulling you through a door labelled ‘staff only’.

“Eddie, wha-”

“You can’t date Steve.”

“I can date whoever I like Eddie,” you respond.

“Why him?” he asked, his hand still wrapped lightly around your wrist.

“Why not?”

“Because,” he began, pausing in thought. “Because he’s… he’s got a reputation. Surely you’ve heard all the rumours?”

“And we both know him well enough to know he’s not that person anymore,” you answer, your gaze locking with Eddie’s who, surprisingly, held it.

“You just can’t, please,” he pleaded.

“Give me a good enough reason as to why I shouldn’t go back out there and I won’t.”

Eddie stayed silent for a few moments, his big, brown eyes locked on yours. The small staff room became stuffy all of a sudden, the air so thick it felt like you could barely breathe. You held your ground, waiting for him to speak, but he didn’t. You stared back at Eddie, your eyes pleading with him to just say something. Anything.

You broke your gaze from Eddie’s and turned towards the door, ready to give up and go home. Eddie’s grip on your wrist tightened and he pulled you back towards him, using his free hand to cup your face as his lips met yours.

You weren’t sure how long you’d been there, Eddie kissing you, but it felt like forever. The tension in the air vanished, leaving you with a cozy feeling deep in your stomach, where the butterflies used to live. 

“You can do better than him. You deserve better than him. You deserve someone who knows that you take extra sugar in your coffee when you’re studying. Someone who knows that you’re a completely evil genius in the best way possible when it comes to D&D. Someone who knows you’d rather be in bed with a book at-” he glanced at his watch, “nine o’clock at night. Someone who apparently isn’t very good at making the first move.”

“You’re clueless, you know that?”

“I am?”

“Yeah,” you replied, leaning in to kiss him again.

If it wasn’t for Ruben who knows how long you would have stood there, entwined together, lost in the moment.

“Hey man, you heading home?” Eddie asked casually, placing a little distance between the two of you.

“I was, but turns out I’m staying late. Guy with the hair on table twelve tipped me a hundred bucks to finish your bar shift and fetch a fresh brownie out. Said you ‘owe him one’ and you can ‘square it up later’. Brownie will be out in five. Enjoy.”

[mr2swap]

Family therapy: A promising future.

-What do you think of “dad”? The first place medal again, aren't you proud of me?- After the flash of the photo I looked at his old and tired face, he barely made a small smile that seemed totally fake, I knew what was hidden behind his smile, only jealousy and bitterness, I was sure what was going through his mind right now:

“That should be me, you stole my youth, my life, my triumphs”

But I think deep down he knew that all of that was a lie, he wouldn't have been able to get to where his body is now if it wasn't for me his father, Before I took his life he was just a teenager slowly approaching failure.

-HEY! Let's take a picture with just the guy for the hall of fame

My Ex-wife Karol and my son Nathan walked away from me and The photographer started taking pictures of my perfect body, When I did a double bicep curl the camera flash focused completely on me, My son Nathan's face of defeat In my old body was just funny. Maybe at one point Nathan could have accomplished all of this on his own, but now he was just a sad, overweight old man.

-Congratulations… “Son”-

Before I was a retired man, I used to be a teacher and had seen hundreds of kids like my son Nathan, he started skipping a few classes, failing most of the tests, going to the infirmary in PE and then getting caught smoking pot with his friends behind school. I knew if I didn't do something drastic, what would be the end of my son Nathan frying French fries at McDonald's and living in a tiny apartment with his teenage sweetheart who is pregnant.

His mom and I were so sick of Nathan we started fighting, and it led to a divorce, the only thing I had left in my life was Nathan and I couldn't let that last one slip through my hands.

Since there was someone who could help me and that was my old boss and friend, Principal Morris, we had done this trick so many times to deal with the Bullies in the school, just swapping their bodies for a week with their victims would make them turn model students.

I called him and I found out my problem with my son, without asking him, he gave me the recipe for his secret elixir, the body swapping potion, it was enough for two people to drink a bit of that potion, and they would immediately be in each other's bodies, and that I did I poured some into my coffee and into Nathan's breakfast juice, he didn't even notice the taste he drank every drop of that juice until he started to feel the effects of the potion.

Just a little dizziness, A little sleep and a blink later Our souls traded places occupying each other's bodies. Nathan was so confused by the identical person in front of him that he ran off to his room like a madman, he didn't even realize his huge belly was bouncing up and down as he ran his little feet around his old room where I sleep now.

Meanwhile, I was left alone in the dining room admiring my new youth In the kitchen mirror, It felt good to be a teenager again Although there was a lot of work to be done, I ran my hands over my soft and weak arms, but I already had everything planned, he had even bought a membership to the gym that was close to Nathan's school.

When everything seemed calmer in Nathan's room, pretending totally that you didn't know what hadn't happened, I spent hours pretending that I was on the computer looking for my information on body switching and things like that so that Nathan wouldn't suspect that I had something. What to do with this

I tried to calm him down by telling him that he wouldn't have to worry about anything in my body, he could sit his ass on the sulfate all day Watching TV or playing his video games and no one would notice that he was really just a 15-year-old, meanwhile I would go to the school and would pretend to do it.

As the years passed I improved Nathan's life, in just one year Nathan's life improved, his grades were perfect, and all the dedication I put into Nathan's diet and gym paid off, Nathan's adolescent muscles reacted very well to protein powder and weight lifting.

I got rid of the good for nothing, my son's friends and started making new friends at the gym my Gym bros, It's great to be young again, making friends is so easy, especially when you look as big and handsome as me.

And while I was living My second life they need, he didn't seem to get used to his new life, he avoided leaving the house as much as possible, and he became grumpy, all he does is clean the house, go to the supermarket and spend all day insulting kids his age while playing online video games, He hates when I walk shirtless around the house demanding my hard horny muscles or when I pose for the pictures I post on my new Instagram, he was so upset that his life has improved so much that he refused to give me his social media passwords, but it's okay there's nothing to make me proud of old Nathan.

Maybe in a couple of years when Nathan learns what it's like to be an adult responsible for getting back into his body In the meantime I'll enjoy myself a little more being a teenager, maybe I'm ready for dating now, I've always wanted to try something new, and I can't stop From looking at all the hot guys in the gym, and they keep staring at me, I don't think Nathan will mind if I fuck a guy or two while I'm in his body.

Sup If you liked this story or any of my other stories you can take a look at my story archive by subscribing to my page on Ko-fi, there are a lot of stories that haven't been published here yet and that are too hot for Tumblr.

[pensat-i-fet]

Trick...and treat her well (Pedri x Reader) / Halloween '23

Masterlist

Wattpad

After another long day at uni, you just wanted to go home and sleep. Thankfully, the following day was a bank holiday, so you knew you could just sleep in and sort of do nothing all day. But your boyfriend had other plans. Plans that interrupted your own plans.

“What are you doing in bed? Come on! Let’s get ready”, said Pedri, in a too loud voice, when he got to the room. You usually liked how hyper and excited he got by the smallest of things but not at that exact moment.

“Ready for what?”

“It’s Halloween!”

“Pedro, we live in Spain, not America. No one cares about Halloween around here”, you rolled your eyes and laid back down in bed.

“But we talked about going to that party…do you not want to go? I bought us the costumes and everything”.

It was so rare for him to want to go to something like a party that you felt bad saying no. His mood got so much better after being back in training with the team too, and he wanted to celebrate. So you got up and put the costume on, even though you kind of hated it, and you both left for the party.

But it was impossible to concentrate on having fun. Your mind was somewhere else. In all the classes you had to go to, the assignments you had to get done, …it was a bit overwhelming at the moment. People were drinking and that always made your anxiety worse. You didn’t like how hard it was to guess what a drunk person could do next. And when a few of them bumped into you, that feeling only got worse.

“Trick or treat?”, screamed Pedri, making you jump.

“Treat?”

“Here”, he said, offering a bag of sweets and pecking your lips. “Double treat. Just for you”.

You smiled at him but the smile was soon gone when you checked the time and saw how early it was. You had only been there for twenty minutes but it felt like hours.

The only good thing about the party was that Pedri stayed with you the whole time. You definitely didn’t want to be left alone somewhere where there were so many people. You didn’t know who many of them were either. And, even though Pedri was busy chatting and laughing with people, he knew you well. So he soon noticed there was something wrong.

“You ok?”

“Sure”, you answered, trying to smile.

“You don’t look ok. Are you not feeling well or something? Is that why you went to bed earlier?”

“Kind of. But you’re having fun so forget it”.

“No, I’m not having fun if you aren’t too”.

Despite appreciating his kindness, you also felt bad about his reaction. Your mood was not only annoying you, but it was now going to annoy him too. Great. It only made you feel worse about yourself.

“Let’s go home”.

“Pedri, we don’t have to…”.

“We do. I don’t even like parties anyway. You know that”.

“But…”.

“Shh”, he said, placing his index finger on your lips. “You come first always. Let’s go”.

It didn’t take you long to get back home and Pedri told you to go to the sofa and wait for him. He was going to make a drink for you.

“Trick or treat?”, he asked again, this time without yelling.

“Can I have both?”

“Greedy”, he laughed. “You can have this cup of tea I made for you and all these sweets I took from the party”.

“Oh my God”, you said, laughing too. “That’s so much. It’ll take me a week to eat all of it”.

“I might help you finish it”.

“Is this how American kids feel after trick or treating? I don’t even know what to eat first”. “I guess. My only source for it is the movies I watched. And the videos where parents pretended they ate all their sweets”.

“Those videos are horrible. So cruel”.

Pedri sat down next to you and brought you closer to him before turning the TV on and finding the channel you liked. More Buffy reruns were on. Perfect.

“So…wanna talk about it?”

You sighed. Did you want to talk about it? Maybe. But it wasn’t easy to put into words things you didn’t fully understand.

“I don’t know. It’s just…life, I guess. Uni kicking my ass and I just feel very defeated sometimes”.

“Did something in particular happen? Or is it just a general thing?”

“General, I think”.

“That’s…well”, he laughed. “I don’t know if better or worse. I guess if it was just one problem, we could try to fix it but if it’s just a general thing, it’s a bit harder”.

“I suppose it is like that, yeah”.

“What can I do to help?”

You looked at him and smiled immediately. He was always so eager to help. “You’re doing well so far. But I guess just be there when I need you. Talking is helping me right now. And, I don’t know, maybe you could pamper me a bit”.

“So it’s all just an excuse to be treated like a princess, got it”, he joked and your smile became wider.

“I can’t fool you, can’t I?”

[crazyk-imagine]

Big Time Crush

Pairing: James Diamond x Insecure!Plus size!reader Characters: Insecure!Plus size!reader, Katie Knight, Jennifer “Mama” Knight, James Diamond, Kendall Knight, Carlos Garcia, Hortense “Logan” Mitchell

Briefly mentioned: Camille Roberts, Gustavo Rocque, Kelly Wainwright, Snoop Dog, The Jennifer’s Warnings: Shenanigans, Katie being a sweetheart, the boys doing their best to help James, plans not going the way anyone planned, jerky teens, don’t mess with someone the boys, Katie, and Mama Knight like, the pool is a good place for jerky people to chill in, Mama Knight always manages to find the oddest recipes  Word Count: 4,151

A/N: I honestly have no idea what happened to Dad Knight but we’re gonna pretend that Jennifer and he went through a divorce when the kids were young, and she kept her married last name

Late Christmas gift (fic) for requester @lilacprincessofrecovery​ 

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You sit beside Katie, Kendall’s little sister, who’s currently working on earning a quick buck or two from the “pool jockies” as you and Camille like to call them. You glance over at her cards and see that she’s close to winning another round of go fish. 

The jockies can’t grasp the basic rules of poker so you came up with a compromise and chose a classic game of go fish. 

You lean over and whisper, “the one across from you has queens and the one to your left has seven.” 

“You’re sure?” 

“I’m right about the queens. You just need one more than the one on your right and you’ll win.” 

“Okay.” 

Thanks to your little tip, she won which none of them liked. 

“If you don’t want to lose, then don’t play,” you advise. 

The one that sits across from Katie scoffs, heading back inside, most likely getting his luggage to go home for winter break. 

“It’s been a while since you had something to eat. Do you want me to get you anything from the snack machine?” 

“I think I’m gonna head inside and go play some video games. You can join me since Kendall’s at the studio, finishing up their latest album.” 

You smile, “alright. Be prepared to lose to the master.” 

“Oh, you’re on. Oh, actually can you get some candy. Mom wants to try this weird candy recipe and I was supposed to ask Kendall, but you know, I was in the zone before he left.” 

You nod, “yeah, sure. Anything specific?” 

“No gummies and no chocolate.” 

“That leaves room for a lot of choices, doesn’t it?” 

She raises her arms, “I’m not the one who made the recipe.” 

“Yeah, yeah.” 

“I’ll wait with you.” 

“You don’t have to do that.” 

“You’re the only other person here besides my brother and his idiot friends who is actually nice to me. My mom also wouldn’t like it if I came up without you.” 

“Aww, who’s a mama’s girl.” You pull out a dollar from your pocket, reaching for your bag when you realize you left it at the table. “Hey, can you do me a quick favor and grab my bag. I want to make sure I get enough for your mom. You’ve got me curious about her future creation.” 

She nods. 

You push the buttons for the candy when a shadow blocks the light, turning you find one of the guys from the game. 

“Hey, chubbs.” 

You furrow your brows, hoping he’ll go away before Katie comes back. 

“Maybe if you didn’t eat all this junk, you’d lose a pound or two.” 

“Just because I’m getting candy, doesn’t mean it’s for me.” 

“Isn’t that what they all say.” 

You furrow your brows, “you don’t have to be a jerk.” 

“You don’t have to be a jerk, cry me a river. Quite eating this crap,” he smacks the item out of your hands. “It’s not for you.” 

You don’t look up, keeping your eyes on the floor. 

“Can’t even look away from it for a second. Pathetic.” 

He walks away when one of his buddies calls him over. 

Katie stands beside you, handing you your bag. “Are you okay?” 

You put a brave face on and nod. “Yep, all good. Now, let’s get your mom the candy so she can get started on it.” 

Katie overheard what the jerk said and wants to make you feel better, but she’s never been good at it. She’s not letting you go back to your apartment until you absolutely have to, no one should be sad or alone during the holidays. Her eyes widen at the amount of candy you got. “Okay. I think we’re more than okay. This is already a lot more than what I planned on getting.” 

“You sure?” 

She nods, “definitely.” She grabs the candy from you and holds it close to her chest. “Let’s go. If she gets started now, she can be done but the time the boys get back.” 

“You guys don’t have any holiday plans?” 

“We did but then everyone canceled so we’re stuck here but now you can hang out with us.” 

“Oh, I can? I feel honored.” 

“My mom loves you.” 

“I’ve only met her once.” 

“And she thought you really nice. Wait, until she hears about you helping me win.” 

You push the elevator close door button, wanting to get to their apartment faster. “Don’t you dare.” 

“She won’t believe me anyway.” 

“Ha!” 

The young girl shakes her head, smiling, feeling proud of herself for bed able to keep you happy… even if it’s only temporary. She has an idea that maybe you don’t actually like what you see. She sees the baggy clothes you wear to hide yourself; it makes more sense with what that jerk told you earlier. “You look nice by the way,” Katie tells you, keeping her attention on the elevator doors. 

“Oh,” you whisper, not expecting her to say that. You glance down at your usual jean and sneaker combo followed by your cute festive, semi tight Christmas holiday shirt with a black jacket to keep you warm. “Thanks. I like your shoes.” 

She smirks, you had given her Christmas shoes laces as a joke not expecting her to wear them of course but here you are. “I know.” 

-

“We’re back,” the child announces, walking into the apartment. 

“Who’s we exactly?” Her mom asks, the last time she tried to get Katie a friend it turned out to be an adult who then stole her car- or rental car, it was a blur after realizing it was a car that was in her possession was stolen. “Oh,” she notices you, standing in the doorway and smiles. “Come on in. I’m so happy it’s you. How are you?” She hugs you, you weakly hug her back. 

The negative thoughts try to enter your mind again. ‘She pities you. Forever the fat pitied girl.’ You give her a weak smile. “We got the last ingredient you needed for your latest creation.” 

“Oh, that’s so sweet but I’m pretty sure my daughter was supposed to tell her brother to get it.” 

“She mentioned something like that, but I figured why not try the vending machine first. Save a few bucks, you know.” 

“I knew I liked you for a reason.” 

“We’re gonna play games.” Katie tries to pull you towards the couch when her mom stops her. 

“Oh no. You promised to help me.” 

“But-” 

“It could be fun.” 

“Don’t side with her, please.” 

“You two could make Christmas cookies.” 

“Oh, yay. I’ve been waiting make some myself but-” ‘She’s gonna think your fat, talking about cookies.’ “I- uh- never found the time.” 

“Let’s make the cookies… from scratch.” 

“I don’t like the look you have on your face, Katie,” you tell the young girl. 

The smile never leaving her face. 

“How about Mrs. Knight and I switch places?” 

“First, it’s Ms. Knight. And no, you two can make the cookies.” She turns to you, “I have faith that you’ll make sure the cookies come out right. Katie just wants to throw flour on you.” 

You nod, “I figured as much.” 

The older woman smiles, patting your arm, “you’re gonna have fun.” 

A nervous chuckle escapes you, “I don’t know.” 

“You will and while you do, I’ll be over there on the couch reading a book.” 

“Fabio?” 

The mother of the apartment says nothing. 

“Have fun with your book.” 

She nods and heads over to the couch, getting comfortable. 

“Alright,” you turn to Katie, “what flavor are we making?” 

“Chocolate chip.” 

“Excellent choice.” You order her to get all of the items and ingredients you’ll need and remind her of the sweet outcome whenever she huffs and puffs. 

“Now can we make the cookies?” 

“Yep, let’s get started.” You tell her which ingredients you need while you do the mixing. 

You two sit and play hangman while you two wait for the cookies to finish cooking. “Seriously? You used the word ambrosia. How was I supposed to guess that?” 

She smirks, “don’t order me around.” 

“Oh,” you shake your head, “you’re evil.” 

“I don’t think so.” 

“Of course, you don’t.” The timer on the microwave dings. “I’ll check on the cookies.” 

The boys enter the apartment and slump against the couch, two on each side of Kendall and Katie’s mom. “I smell cookies,” says Carlos, with a confused expression. 

“I do too,” Logan and James add. 

“Mom?” 

“Ask your sister,” she flips another page of her book. 

“Okay, Katie. I-” You scream, almost dropping the hot tray of cookies. “Geez.” You grab a towel and set it on the counter before setting the tray down. 

The boys stare at the tray of heavenly smelling cookies... all except for James, who’s jaw is open as he stares at you. 

Katie sits beside Logan who sits beside her brother, watching this whole thing with amusement. 

‘They think your fat for making cookies... even though they look like they want one.’ You purse your lips at this next thought. ‘They can eat them without the sugar going to their hips.’ You avoid her gaze and turn towards the sink, washing the dishes so Ms. Knight doesn’t have to. 

Carlos and Logan glance at one another, eyes switching between each other and the cookies. 

The brainiac shakes his head, the helmet lover nods; this goes on for a couple of minutes until Carlos reaches for a cookie and hisses. 

“The cookies just came out. You saw her take them out,” Katie points out. 

“But- it’s cookies,” the corndog lover weakly argues. 

“They have to cool.” 

“But I want cookies.” 

You dry your hands on a napkin and slowly turn around. “If I,” you pause when the five turn to give you, their attention. “If I get you some cookies, will you stop trying to grab them off the hot cookie sheet?” 

The boys nod. 

Katie gets out of the chair before you asked her to get you plates. 

You scoop a couple of cookies onto each plate and slide them in front of each boy, not forgetting to give a plate to Katie and her mom. 

A small smile tugs at the corner of your lips. 

“Don’t you want to try some?” You shake your head with a polite smile, “no, thanks for offering though Katie.” 

She furrows her brows. “But you said-” 

“I- I decided that I’m gonna stop eating so much candy.” 

She knows where you’re going with this and what thoughts are running around your mind. 

“Oh, okay. Well. I’m sure I can whip up something else,” Ms. Knight offers, collecting the boys’ plates. 

You shake your head, “it's- its fine. I should go back to my place.” You walk around the counter, grabbing your bag off the table. “Thank you so much for letting me hangout here.” 

“Do you h-ave to go?” asks James, voice cracking halfway through. “You could- we could hang- hang out?” 

An uncomfortable smile stretches across your lips. “I- I would but, I have to go. Maybe some other time?” You add even though you don’t really mean it, thinking he was just being nice to the “fat” girl. 

“Oh, yeah. Okay, next time.” 

A quiet, “bye” slips past your lips before the door closes shut. 

-

The boys or Katie’s mom didn’t see you much after that day. They couldn’t find you when it was only everyone in the apartment, Kelly, Gustavo, and Snoop Dog who were stuck at the studio. 

Katie wanted to invite you to stay and hangout with them since she knows your family always have plans, leaving you here alone. She was lucky to have found you a few days after everyone came back from break. 

“How was your guy’s Christmas?” you ask her, sitting in the cabana. 

“Not better than yours.” 

“Somehow I don’t believe that.” 

-

Just because the boys haven’t talked to you since you made cookies, doesn’t mean they haven’t seen you. 

Every time James sees you, he forgets everything he was doing or thinking. 

The others always encourage him to try and ask you out (not just because they’re tired of hearing him go on and on about you) but he always gives them some sort of excuse as to why he can’t or shouldn’t making it even weirder because... it’s James. But they see how he is whenever he’s near you and know that he has a big time crush on you. 

-

Kendall pulls together an idea, knowing that you and Katie are hanging out by the pool as usual so naturally he calls, more like yanks, Carlos and Logan with him. 

“Operation: Get James a date is happening today.” 

“Today? Like today-today? We’re not ready,” Logan tells him. 

“It happens and he will get a date with the one person who can get him to use less of his body spray.” 

“How are we gonna do that?” asks Carlos. 

“I’m glad you asked.” 

They rope James into coming over and helping them with their fake plan. 

“Okay, James. I’m gonna be honest with you right now,” Kendall starts. 

“We lied!” Logan blurts out. 

“That’s not what we agreed to do.” The leader smacks the brainiacs shoulder, who whines as he holds his arm. 

“I’m sorry, I couldn’t hold it in anymore. He should know. He needs to know what we’re doing here.” 

“What exactly are we doing here?” The pretty boy chimes in. 

“We’re helping you ask out the only nice girl here.” Carlos glances over at the offended duo and sighs, correcting himself. “Who isn’t dating anyone.” 

“What?” James eyes widen. “You’re trying to get me to ask her out?! No. No. No.” 

“You can do it,” Carlos encourages him. 

“It’s all going to be fine,” Kendall pats his shoulder. 

“Take these flowers,” Logan shoves the bundle of flowers into his friends’ hand, “and go find her.” 

James trips, using his hands to put some distance between his face and the floor, not wanting to damage his face; the flowers are a now mess on the floor. 

No one stops to help, only glancing over at him and continuing with their day. 

Luckily for you, you didn’t hear it, the music blasting through your headphones blocking out all and any sounds around you. 

He sighs and pushes himself off the ground with sad and slow movements. 

The other three reach out to comfort him but he continues walking past them and into the pool area since the kids from class were having fun first day of summer pool party. 

“She’s still there,” Logan weakly adds. “This is good.” 

“Let’s go before he floats in the pool, staring into the sun,” Carlos taps his helmet before running outside. 

-

You hide in the cabana, not wanting to see anyone or have anyone see you in the jean shorts, you haven’t worn in what feels like a millennium. You don’t even know why you’re here; you should be in your apartment watching some old romance movie that you find stupid because you haven’t been in love or in a relationship. 

You don’t even know why you left the cabana flap open, maybe it was some kind of subconscious self-torture because all you see when you look at the pool is everyone from class which consist of skinny girls in bikinis. 

Just as you pointed them out to yourself, the Jennifer’s give you a polite wave, something not everyone could get which made your harsh thoughts about yourself make you feel bad for thinking these kinds of things when they’ve been nice to you for almost as long as you’ve known them. Sure, they were a bit rough around the edges when you first met the girls but after helping them when they needed it, they’ve been nothing but kind to you. 

The smile falls from your face as you watch them settle onto the pool lounge chairs. ‘They didn’t need to buy new bathing suits. They didn’t gain anything during the holidays.’ You shake your head, sighing. ‘Don’t focus on that. You look cute too. Your shorts are perfect for your shirt.’ You tug your jacket closer around your torso, half tempted to zip it but deciding not to prevent yourself from overheating. You noticed James lazily floating on one of the bed floaties, staring up at the sky. 

Almost as if he could feel eyes on him, his head rolls to the side; he glances over at you. 

You both freeze, keeping eye contact with one another. You didn’t realize it at first but, you offer a small wave in his direction. 

He returns the slow wave. 

You quickly lower your head, trying to focus on your book. ‘Why’d you even accept their invite to this?’ You bite the inside of your cheek, letting go when the flavor of copper hits your tastebuds. ‘They probably invited you out of the pity. The fat girl friends with a child. They want something to laugh at.’ 

-

Katie draws James’s attention away from you. 

“What?” He asks, with an annoyed tone. 

“Get out of the pool and talk to her. She needs someone to talk to and I can’t do it.” 

“Why not?” 

“My mom wants to me to do something that other kids my age do.” She notices the raised brow and disbelief expression he has on his face. “Whatever that means. Go and talk to her. I’m tired of you not saying anything.” 

“I can’t talk to her,” he stresses the second word as if that would help. 

“You can. It’s easy. She likes music, you’re in a band. Find common ground.” 

“You make it sound like I’m going into battle... I’m not, right?” 

“You are and oh look, we’re here.” She shoves him in front of the cabana, hiding behind one of the oddly placed plants. 

James catches himself before he could trip, glancing back of his shoulder only to find no Katie. He sighs. 

“Hi James.” 

His shoulders tense up, eyes quickly moving onto you. 

“You know my name?” 

‘This isn’t awkward.’ You nod, “kind of hard not to when you’re the newest artist around here.” You purse your lips, since when did talking to others get to be so hard. ‘Have I always sounded like this?’ 

He chuckles, “that- uh- yeah, that makes sense.” 

You gulp before you ask him if he wants to sit in here with you. 

His eyes widen in surprise making you feel bad. 

Did you make him think you hated him because if so, that was not your intentions. 

“Yeah, okay.” He’s quick to walk over towards the unoccupied seat near you. 

-

Kendall and the other two exit the Palm Woods lobby with Carlos munching on whatever caught his interest in the vending machine today. 

“Where could he be?” Logan questions with his hands on his lips. 

This was not like their friend to just disappear for hours on end (even though it had been ten minutes. The debate between snacks Carlos had with himself was absolute hell). 

The boy with the extra accessory points to something in front of him, unable to respond as he continues to munch on his snack of the day. 

“Looks like he doesn’t need any help,” Kendall comments. 

“We can get rid of these costumes then, right?” Logan starts itching his collar bone. 

“After we-” 

“Nope,” the brainiac shakes his head. “Nope, besides Carlos already stained his so, we can’t use these.” 

-

“Are you gonna go into the pool at any point today?” James asks, with an innocent tone. 

“Uh- n- I don’t think I will.” 

“Why not?” 

You say the first thing that pops into your head. “I’m not a big fan of splashing.” 

“We could hangout near a corner... or something.” 

“We?” You turn your head to him. 

He scratches the back of his neck, a nervous chuckle slipping through the small smile he has on his lips. “Uh- yeah. I mean or we could- we could just stay here, if that’s what you want. I don’t want you to be uncomfortable.” 

‘If only he knew.’ “Maybe when there’s less people,” you grip the edge of your jacket, further curling it around you. “We could go for a swim,” your voice wavers at the word. 

Almost as if he knows what you’re thinking he offers something else. “Nah, I’ve already been in the sun for too long. I definitely don’t want to become one of those overly tan people, you know.” 

You chuckle, knowing exactly who he’s talking about and sadly, it’s usually the parents of the other kids that live here at the Palm Woods. “Yeah, smart move on your part,” you joke with him. 

The corner of his lip’s twitches, he got you to make a joke. He didn’t think he’d be able to make you smile much less make a joke, the butterflies in his stomach start fluttering faster than ever. 

“Have any of you beaten BTF yet?” 

He furrows his brows, “how do you know about that?” 

“It’s me. Katie gets bored when she beats the pool jockies and we’ve been practicing your guys’ video games so we can beat you.” 

He chuckles, “now that I know that you’re so going down.” 

“I’d like to see you try,” you playfully shove his arm. 

“How can you stand to be near it?” The pool jocky who was being a jerk before Christmas snickers. 

“What?” James asks, not understanding why this guy is being such a jerk to such a nice person. “Just don’t feed her, she’ll never leave if you do.” He turns around, heading towards the pool area feeling very highly of himself. 

Your brows knit together, a sad pout on your lips. “Let’s just go, James.” 

“What?” He spins around, standing in front of you. “No. He doesn’t get to talk to you like that and pretend like he didn’t.” 

“It’s fine. This isn’t something new.” 

“And I’m gonna make sure it doesn’t happen again.” 

You didn’t see anything because Logan and Carlos stop you from following him. “Would you let me at least-” 

“Nope,” the former shakes his head. “Not happening. Kendall and James have got this handled.” 

Carlos nods, “yeah. We just gotta trust them-” 

And then the quick screams of the Jennifer’s and pool splashing causes all of your eyes to widen. 

“I’m sure it’s fine,” Logan says, turning you around so your back is to the facing the front desk of the lobby as he avoids your gaze. 

James walks through the open doors, stopping in the doorway, smiling when he sees you and tries to slick his hair back. 

Kendall rolls his eyes, Katie walking up behind the two. “Please stop.” 

The two jump up, hugging one another as they let out a quick scream until they realize who it is and immediately push the other one away from them. 

“You’re fine, she won’t care if your hair is messed up-” 

“It’s messed up?” He asks, reaching for hair. 

“What? No. That’s not important. If I hear you did something to make her cry or anything to hurt, her feelings. You won’t know revenge until it happens to you.” 

A short chuckle slips past your lips as you place a hand on James’s shoulder. “Let’s not threaten people today, Katie.” 

“I’m not, just implying what could happen if he isn’t nice,” she says, a fake smile tugging at the corner of her lips. 

“Yeah, I’m not buying that.” You start to push James into the direction of the elevators. You two stare at the doors, unsure of how to talk to one another knowing that he did- whatever it is he did because he cares about you. ‘My stomach feels weird, but I don’t have an upset stomach?’ “Thank you.” 

“It was fun.” 

“Not as much as it’ll be when I kick your butt.” 

“Oh, you’re on.” 

-

Carlos tilts his head, “does anyone smell cookies?” 

“As long as you don’t smell toast, we’re good,” Logan adds. 

“Huh?” 

“Nothing.” 

“Could you two walk any slower,” Katie whines. She opens the door, shaking her head watching the two having fun. She wanders over, leaning over the back of the couch. “Any more BTF?” 

“You know it.” 

“Cookies are done,” Ms. Knight announces, scooping the cookies off the cookie sheet and onto a plate. 

Everyone runs over to the counter, wincing at the temperature. 

“What does BTF mean?” asks James as he breaks a cookie in half offering you the other half. 

You accept, “oh, that.” You chuckle, “it was actually something I use to make fun of Katie but when I tell you, I… will painfully admit that I’m a fan of your guy’s music because it means… big time fan.” 

He leans in. “Can I assume someone here is your favorite member?” 

“Nope, let’s go play some more. I’m so close to getting the scoreboard to be all BTF.”

[lovelylivelyv]

Beware This Person

Before we begin, obligatory disclaimer: do NOT harass the person I am about to bring up. I don’t want things to spiral out of control and I am simply here to warn you guys about a potentially harmful person I advise you stay away from. Ok? Good. Also a TL;DR is at the bottom of the post just in case.

It has been brought to my attention that someone I had beef with on Discord took to Tumblr and has been badmouthing me for months. Sidetable-Drawer (also one of the mods on Hottoepecker) and I met in a Foster’s Home For Imaginary Friends server though I came across her blogs around the same time. We initially got along well, but then I noticed her behavior would change when it came to disagreements. It got to the point where I felt she was getting extreme, and she blocked me shortly before leaving the server entirely. I thought that would be the end of it, but I find out that two months after she left the server (and two months before the post was sent to me with monthly reblogs), she made an entire rant about two sides of the fandom. However, I noticed for one particular side she seemed to talk less about the side in general and moreso one person, and that person is me. Since she blocked me and made me powerless to defend myself on the post itself, I’m here to warn you all about her behavior.

The post is about how the “Bloo is basically Cartman” and “Bloo did nothing wrong it’s everyone else’s fault” sides of the Foster’s fandom are really annoying. But when she talked about the latter, she brought up multiple things I did specifically, in addition to how her saying she won’t pretend Bloo is an UWU Soft Baby or whatever was something she only started saying after I had the audacity to claim…that the rest of the main cast are flawed individuals that likely don’t understand the weight of their actions against Bloo (ex. excessive yelling, hitting, double-standards; for more info watch The Hidden Pain Of Blooregard Q. Kazoo). For the record, I never claimed “Bloo did nothing wrong”, I only claimed “Bloo deserved better”. But enough about that, I’m going to point out the tip-offs that give away she’s using me to cover up how she’s actually a bully.

“Guys he's just a goofy little asshole who's fun to watch (most of the time) but sometimes needs to be thrown against a wall.”

-She said this a notable amount of times in the Discord server and it sounds unironic. I don’t want to read into this too much, but I firmly believe children don’t deserve to be abused. Yet I’m the demonizer?

“He’s got his own problems…but it also doesn’t justify him being a jerk.”

-I never said his reasons make it ok for him to be a jerk, all I said was he has reasons for acting out. Understanding is not the same as excusing. This is also the same person who thinks Mac was in the right for abandoning Bloo twice but three a fit when Bloo dared to “cheat” on Mac with another kid later on (she can believe it if she wants, but I find it funny that she makes excuses for Mac while having a zero-tolerance policy for Bloo).

“I've seen some people come up with BS takes defending everything Bloo does and throwing every other character under a bus and demonizing them (we had an entire video post about FRANKIE derailed with a reblog about how everyone is "too mean" to Bloo. Please make a new post for your bad takes)”

-As I said above, the first half is not true. Sidetable-Drawer specifically accused me of demonizing them when I explained how leaving Bloo to die in the pilot episode despite mustering the courage to save Mac mere seconds later was the catalyst for his behavior. As for the other…yeah, I derailed one of her threads (because she mentioned Bloo was being a little shit for wanting credit for a rescue), but it was one time. A singular time. This is hypocritical of Sidetable-Drawer to complain about because she’s guilty of doing the exact same thing MULTIPLE times. She not only derailed Bloo conversations to gush about Mac, but also invaded Gloo shipping spaces and constantly called me and others disgusting proshippers over a HEADCANON. Here are some screenshots of Sidetable-Drawer’s continuous derailments, as well as others trying to get her to stop ship-policing: (for privacy sake I’m blocking out all pfps and usernames aside from mine but will put “SD” next to Sidetable-Drawer’s messages)

So much for not burning me at the stake. Imagine calling my opinions bad takes when she’s the one actively harassing others over a ship she can’t accept is genuinely harmless, simply because it doesn’t fit her interpretation of a tweet Craig McCracken made. I’ve talked many times about how the aging thing is not necessarily set in stone for Bloo because of the existence of loopholes (Land Of The Flea) and the implication that Mac’s subconscious reason for creating Bloo was to have the big brother Terrence should have been, so I’ll just leave it at that.

“He's a funny jerk. Sometimes you just have to leave it at that.”

-Mac is a happy little kid, you could just leave it at that too. But you love to dissect how he’s a powerful character for coming out of his trauma a better person and theorizing how Mac’s life used to be before the show’s events. Why shouldn’t Bloo’s complexity be talked about? It sounds like you take issue with the idea that Bloo can be as layered as his peers.

“People are allowed to like Bloo but people are also allowed NOT to like him for these reasons, and you have to deal with it.”

-Then why did you accuse me of demonizing the main cast for saying the others needed to do better too? Why did you harass Gloo shippers to the point of trying to guilt-trip them out of shipping it? YOU’RE the one who’s not allowing people to think differently from yourself.

“(In the tags) Sometimes I remember that horribly squicky ‘Bloo Defense’ video and die a little bit. Sometimes you need to back up and tell yourself…it’s JUST a drawing :p”

-Ship-policing wasn’t enough for you, now you’re policing character analyses just because my view is wildly different from yours. How would you feel if someone told you that for saying Mac deserves better? You yourself are adamant against using “it’s just a cartoon”, but I guess you have no issue using it when someone else’s opinion doesn’t fit your idea of how things should be. Also if you really hated my video that much, you could have left a comment on the video proper instead of dragging my name in the mud for months.

All of this happened over simple disagreements I tried to be polite about despite her ignoring boundaries and shaming others time and time again. Normally I don’t respond to hate comments, but after having to deal with Sidetable-Drawer’s behavior on Discord for months and eventually finding out how she went out of her way to mock me and leave me powerless to defend myself, I knew I had to speak out about all this. If anybody figured out she was actually talking about one person and knew it was me, I could have been harassed. If I can help at least one person avoid being on the receiving end of her bullying, so be it.

TL;DR A Foster’s Home fan vilified me for having a different perspective, disguised a Tumblr post and subsequent reblogs targeting me to be about another group of Foster’s fans, and I’m warning others to stay away from her so they don’t go through the same thing if not worse.

[kimbappykidding]

Vernon x Sister’s Best Friend Part One

Imagine being best friends with Vernon’s twin sister and having a huge crush on him. His birthday getaway is going well until you get trapped pretending to be Dino’s girlfriend.

Part Two Here

You'd liked Vernon ever since you were kids but were always too shy to do anything about it. Not to mention you didn’t want his twin sister and your best friend Elena to feel awkward and you had no idea how she’d take it. Then Vernon went off and got famous making everything worse.

As if your crush wasn’t unattainable enough he became a kpop star and had hundreds and thousands of admirers around the world. It just seemed like overkill. 

He'd come back in the holidays and if you thought he was good-looking before now it was a joke. You stayed away from the seventeen stuff just because it felt odd considering you knew him but you’d seen a few music videos and got why he was so popular. He had the talent, personality and looks. A triple threat and despite everything you were proud of him for doing so well. 

So you carried on with your life back home and tried not to think about Elena’s brother too much but sometimes he made it hard. 

You let yourself into Elena’s house like usual and looked around for her. "Elena get your ass down here!" you called standing at the bottom of the stairs. You heard a noise in the kitchen so followed it "speaking of asses mine just about froze on the way over here so can we please walk fast today?" you asked only to find Vernon standing there instead. You froze in a mix of shock and embarrassment "Vernon...I didn’t know you were back". He looked embarrassed at what he’d heard but also slightly amused "yeah I came back for the winter holidays...so last day of university huh?". You nodded "yep..." still bright red "did you hear any of what I was saying?". "No..." he said but it was more of a question the way he said it. You cursed and he laughed when Elena appeared. "Hey y/n you ready?" she asked. "Yep let's go, now!" you cried grabbing her arm and dragging her outside. Vernon smirked watching you go but you were too busy trying to get out the door to notice.

After your lecture was done you headed back to Elena’s to study but you were more prepared this time. You walked inside cautiously but quickly heard Vernon. Elena walked towards the noise and you followed to see Vernon and a friend. "Hey we’re back" Elena called. "So I see” Vernon nodded “y/n this is my friend Dino. Dino this is my sister's friend y/n". The boy nodded to you and you nodded back at him. “Are you glad to have finished for Christmas?” Vernon asked looking at you. "Of course!" Elena cried "you're honestly so lucky you dropped out of school". Vernon’s friend smirked and Vernon blushed but you came to his defence “to be fair he left for a career so it wasn’t really dropping out”. Elena shrugged but Vernon shot you a smile that made you feel like you were melting even with the cold winter air. 

Apparently Vernon’s friend was home for the holidays and they were in Seventeen together. Elena said he was basically your age and was really nice but you didn’t talk to him much. As usually you found yourself drawn to Vernon  and spent a lot of your time with him over the holidays. It was like this every time he came home. You’d hang out a lot and it’d be like nothing ever changed...then he’d disappear again for 3 months minimum and you’d be back to square one. This time was no different and after a fun winter break he left with no idea when he’d be back again. 

You didn’t hear from Vernon again until the summer. It was Vernon's birthday and he’d rented a huge house in the woods and invited his friends and sister who brought you. She said Vernon had said to invite you anyway but you figured you were mainly there as Elena’s plus one. Little did you know Elena already had her company sorted.  

When Elena said you were getting picked up from her house you figured she meant by Vernon but apparently not. A car that definitely wasn’t Vernon’s appeared and Dino hopped out of the driver’s seat. Elena began loading her stuff in his car while Dino helped her. They looked pretty casual but you just shrugged and got comfy in the back. Once everyone was in the car they didn’t start driving. "Y/n we have something to tell you" Elena said and you paused panicked "what? This is how every horror film starts". Dino chuckled "no it's nothing like that" and he looked at your friend. "We’re dating" Elena said. You blinked a few times before it sunk in "ow...erm what do I say back? congratulations?". Elena laughed "thanks y/n...but the reason we're telling you is we could do with an ally on this trip. See nobody knows were together especially my brother so if you could help us keep it that way we’d be so grateful". You shrugged "yeah sure I can watch the hallway or help you sneak around or whatever". "Thanks y/n!" Elena cried and Dino smiled "you and Vernon are right, she is pretty cool". The mention of Vernon calling you cool made you smile and you nodded in a good mood. "I am the best" you agreed "now should we start driving?".

You reached the house three hours later and Vernon came out to greet you. He paused when he saw you and at first you were worried he didn’t want you here but he was staring at Dino. "Did you drive from my house?" he asked looking at you and Elena. Dino nodded "yeah I was nearby so offered to pick them up". You and Elena nodded along and Vernon shrugged “well thank you...come on in!”.

The house was extremely beautiful and despite housing all of Vernon’s members and more it still felt spacious and elegant. You and Elena would be sharing a room which you were fine with and Vernon helped you with your bags. He took them up for you and gave you a quick tour. “So you’ve got your own bathroom but if you need anything just let me know” Vernon told you. “Cool a balcony!” Elena cried not really listening but you smiled “thanks and thank you for letting me tag along. I’m really looking forward to it”. Vernon smiled “you aren’t tagging along, you’re invited. I’m looking forward to it too” and he walked away with a wave of his hand. You blushed and waved back feeling like you were back in secondary school all over again. 

You soon had a holiday routine in place but it was very different to Elena’s who rose early and lived for the outdoors. Like Vernon you weren’t one to run around outside. You rose late and were pretty chill. You’d usually go downstairs, get a coffee and sit with a book for a while before you were ready to start your day. Your routine must've looked good because Vernon soon started following you. You’d sit reading while he listened to music or watched something and then you’d both discuss what had happened in each. It was a really nice peaceful start to the day and you liked when the house was quiet and it was just the two of you.  

One day however you surprised even yourself by being more adventurous. "Wanna go for a walk?" you asked one day and Vernon paused "outside?". You chuckled "yeah gross I know but it just occurred to me I haven’t been four feet from the house this entire trip, seems like I should venture out at some stage atleast once". Vernon laughed "yeah sounds good, let me just grab my coat". So the two of you set off and on your way out passed Scoups and Joshua. They paused seeing you head for the door "you're going outside? But the sun’s gone in". "Yeah that's the point" Vernon laughed.  "And there’s rain forecast" Joshua added. You simply pulled your hood up and Vernon pulled an umbrella from the coat rack. He accidentally opened it nearly attacking everyone which made you all laugh. Vernon was blushing which you found adorable but not wanting to embarrass him, you quickly moved on. 

Although the idea of a walk was nice you were the two worst people for the task. Neither of you knew what direction anything was in and so you just started walking towards some trees in the distance. “So how has University been?” Vernon asked and you nodded “good, next year is my final year though which is terrifying”. He nodded “I can imagine, do you know what you’re doing for your dissertation?”.  You shook your head “nope so let’s not talk about that. How’s work?”. Vernon chuckled at your deflection and nodded “works good, although I do miss home and wish I could visit more”. “You seriously miss our tiny little town?” you asked amazed “you see all these huge cities and cool places, I thought you’d never miss it”. Vernon shrugged “it’s more the people than the place” and he looked at you when he said that. It was like he was directing that at you which immediately made you blush and look away flustered. “That makes sense, it is weird without you”. “It is?” he asked and you nodded “yeah just sometimes things happen and I know you’d find it funny but you’re not there to tell”. Vernon paused “but you know you can always call or text me right?” he asked “i’d love to hear what’s going on”. “Really?” you asked and Vernon nodded “definitely! and just to know what’s going on with you too. There’s no reason we have to wait for my rare days off to keep in contact, right?” Vernon asked. You nodded “that’s true I just figured you might be too busy”. He shook his head “not at all and even if I am i’ll make time”. You smiled pleased and Vernon smiled seeing your reaction “actually I’ve been meaning to ask you about something” he started when the sky thundered and the heavens opened. Your hood and Vernon’s umbrella was useless with the wind and so you gave up and started running for the house. The only trouble was you couldn’t remember which direction it was. You ran around in random directions for ages before Vernon spotted it. 

You finally crashed through the front door and both rushed to the fireplace for it’s warmth. "This is why I hate the outdoors!" you cried. Vernon laughed "right? It's awful" and sunk down beside you. You tugged your coat off and rubbed your hands together. "Do we have frostbite? Can you get frostbite in the summer?". Vernon chuckled "I'm not sure but probably in Russia or Canada yeah". "Well I guess I'm just cold them". Vernon smiled and grabbed a blanket from a nearby chair and wrapped it around your shoulders "here". You smiled at the gesture and for a second the two of you just held still in the moment. You were very close together and you felt the intensity of his gaze on you. In the firelight his eyes and lips looked very nice...not to mention Vernon's hair was very wet and the water droplets looked so pretty in the dim light. You both realised you were staring and looked down awkwardly. Vernon went to say something when the members appeared and Scoups and Joshua erupted seeing you. “What happened to the umbrella and hood?” they called. “Well the wind destroyed the umbrella” Vernon started “and the hood did nothing to stop water spraying directly into my face” you finished. The other members all laughed at your bad luck and then Jeonghan insisted you both go shower and get changed so you didn’t get ill. 

You both obeyed and saw one another a few hours later at dinner. Vernon smiled "feel warmer?". You nodded "I'm pretty sure I used up all the hot water in the house but yes". He chuckled "fair enough, glad you're feeling better. Overall It was still a pretty good walk". You nodded "yeah it a totally was...if you took away all the nature". Vernon laughed "exactly my thought, maybe we should try it again when the nature isn't so...disagreeable". You smiled "that sounds good" and Vernon nodded "good...okay". He was blushing slightly and you paused. Was that Vernon's way of asking you out? Was this a date? "Sorry can I get past?" Jun asked appearing behind you and you nodded rushing to move out of the way. Vernon moved the cushions on the seat next to him and you sat down. You were close together and at the edge of the room but it was nice. You were both quiet and introverted so here you could just observe and relax without being at the centre of attention.

They were currently teasing Mingyu about something before he managed to shift the attention to Dino. “Dino never helps with chores!” Mingyu cried and they all nodded. “He does sometimes” Wonwoo tried but Scoups wasn’t having any of it “I haven’t seen him wash a plate since we got here”. “He keeps disappearing conveniently” Seungkwan said and The8 paused “yeah you do...where were you today? You were gone for hours”. Dino paused and you saw Elena shift uncomfortably. “I was in my room” Dino said but Seungkwan shook his head “no you weren’t, you’re sharing with Vernon and anytime I came to see if he was back from his walk it was empty”. Dino gulped and Scoups laughed “what going on, why are you so nervous?”. He blushed “because I can’t tell you where I was”. Everyone’s attention was well and truly peaked and they all started shouting out questions and ideas where he was. “Were you stuck on the toilet?” Dk asked bluntly while Joshua guessed he got locked outside or something. “Why can’t you just tell us?” Woozi asked “he’s doing it for attention”. “No i’m doing it because I wasn’t alone!” he replied. Everyone froze and The8 looked at him “you’ve been sneaking away with someone?”. Elena’s eyes were wide and you sighed figuring she’d have to come clean. 

All the members heard your sigh and looked in your direction. “Y/n?” Vernon asked and you looked at Dino before looking to Elena. She suddenly stood up and announced "y/n and Dino are dating!". "Elena!" you scolded her but all the members took that as confirmation and began teasing Dino. Elena tugged you to her "please just go with it” she whispered. You sighed but nodded. "Wait is this true?" Jeonghan asked. Dino looked at you and you nodded "yep". "How?" Seungkwan asked. Dino took the lead "well you remember I went to Vernon's house for Christmas last year?". "It’s been going on since then!" Vernon cried and you remembered he was there and froze. He was looking at you both his eyes wide in shock and you noticed his voice seemed a little strained but he coughed and tried again "that was like 7 months ago”. Dino nodded smiling "yeah it’s been that long...we met then and got talking. When I left I gave her my number and we’ve been visiting each other". "Wait as in you came up to see him?" Vernon asked you "to our city?". You looked at Dino before nodding "yeah sometimes he visits me and sometimes I come up to see him". "Wow our Dino is all grown up and dating!" Hoshi cried and that started all the members off again. While they were distracted Elena grabbed you "thank you so much! I promise I'll tell Vernon I just didn’t want him to find out like that". You nodded "it's fine...where is Vernon?".

Vernon had stepped outside and headed upstairs when everyone began cheering for Dino. He was in utter disbelief. You and dino? Was he blind? How on earth had he missed that? He was also very pissed at himself. He’d wasted so much time worrying about when he should ask you out, if you’d say yes etc and Dino met you once, knew he liked you and did something about it. He was such a coward and now here was the result! He’d lost you. He sighed when there was a knock. The8 appeared "hey I thought someone should come check if you're okay". Vernon nodded “i’m fine”. “Are you sure because it’s okay if you’re not” The8 said softly. Vernon sighed "I’m okay I’m just a little angry at Dino". The8 paused "you’re mad?”.  Vernon nodded “well it’s just...that’s my sister’s friend who i’ve known for years! To think he’s been sneaking around with her this whole time...I feel betrayed”. The8 paused “I know it’s weird for you but I don’t think Dino betrayed you. I mean it’s not like he was dating your sister but your sister’s friend. He didn’t really have to tell you, neither of them did". Vernon took a breath, he knew he probably sounded crazy overprotective or worse, The8 could see right through that and recognised his crush on you, but he still couldn’t just pretend it was okay. "I just wish he'd have told me...it’s been 7 months. That's a long time and what if something happened between them? If they broke up then y/n might hate me by consequence! Or my sister!". "I don’t think y/n would do that so don’t worry...I get you feel startled though so maybe talk to Dino about it? I’m sure he never meant to hurt you". Vernon nodded "I know...". The8 smiled "would you like me to bring you some food upstairs?". Vernon shook his head "no thanks I'm not hungry I think I'll just shower and go to bed". The8 nodded "okay I'm here you need me" and left.

Vernon sighed sitting down on his bed and stared at the wall. Part of him was really grateful the weather stopped him from asking you out earlier today. That would’ve been really embarassing, but mostly he was just miffed he’d been beated to it. He’d been too much of a coward and he’d lost you.

He couldn’t believe it. 

-----------------------

I know Vernon’s birthday is in February but I needed time to pass so just pretend he’s a summer baby or he gets two birthdays like the queen (he deserves that).

Also I know Vernon has a sister in real life but of course this is NOT based on her. This is just for fun based on his stage character.  

[milkhoney531]

Personal rant, cancer, abuse, suicidal thoughts

So, today, last year, my mom died from cancer.

My mom and I didn't have a great relationship. A lot of mixed feelings. She liked a carefully curated version of me that she made up out of my existing traits. She liked the me that is good with kids, creative, helpful, got good grades, responsible, and that pretended to be a straight girl.

I liked the mom I had before I came out at 13. The one that was supportive, that pretended to be pro lgbt (until it was her kids), the one that was kind and didn't try to use my abuse against me or threaten to throw me out at any little inconvenience.

My mom loved a specifically crafted version of me and I loved a mom that I learned didn't exist. That didn't exist for me. But that version of mom existed for my siblings. After her death, I learned they got an even nicer version. A real version. One that would take care of my siblings when they were sick, cheer them up when they were sad, and even taught them secret recipes or told them family secrets.

Things she never did with me. If I was sick, even if I had a fever and was vomiting, she never believed me and would send me to school or when I was too old for her to force me she would belittle me, doubt me, tell me I was throwing away my future, and wouldn't ever help me. When I was sad, down right depressed or suicidal, she turned a blind eye or told me to suck it up.

But for my siblings, if they were sick she would take care of them. She would feed them, put on movies, let them play video games, let them relax. Not me. I had to clean and I had to do nothing but lay in bed or do homework. If my siblings were sad, she would comfort them and do something special with them. Not me, never me.

No matter what I did for her or the family, I was always unworthy because of who I was. Because I have autism, because I'm not cis, because I'm not straight.

I think she saw my mere existence as a slight against her.

I was only worthy of her if I went above and beyond to serve her and the family, even if that ment I was left off worse.

Like how in middle school I had to leave school early, by myself, to walk home rain or thunderstorm to get home before my siblings so i could care for the dogs, get dinner started, do the chores, and help my siblings with their homework.

Once there was even a really bad thunderstorm, the town was literally flooded, lightning was striking everywhere and I walked home in that. I took my usual shortcut through the park and a family of skunks just walked past me like I wasn't there. I didnt have an umbrella at least. I was soaked head to toe. I got home, changed, and did my normal routine. My siblings didn't walk home and were able to take the bus. When my mom got home she asked why I didn't call anyone to pick me up. I lied and said my phone died, but in truth, I didn't think anyone would pick me up, I didn't think that was an option. If I ever needed help or would like it, I was told to figure things out myself. So I did because I had learned that I'm not worthy of being helped, that if I had to rely on anyone else for anything, that I should prepare to be disappointed. That I shouldn't expect or bother to ask for help.

Honestly, when I went to college, I was planning to never come back home. I was planning how to take my siblings out of her custody because while I was gone, my little sister started getting hit by my mom.

But she got cancer and I dropped everything. I came back to help. I helped so my two youngest siblings wouldn't have to worry. So they could have more of their childhood. A childhood I never got.

She died May 16th, 2022. And I still don't know how I feel about her. So I didnt write today. Writing a story about surviving prolonged abuse and one about angels and demons was too close to home, especially today. So, I tried to sleep away this day, only to fail.

[bluecardigan-13]

I’m probably writing to no one. But I’d like to pretend I’m writing to you.

Life is really hard right now. I’m super homesick after only 4 months of living in Oklahoma after moving here from HI. You’d think I would be alright since I moved here with my kids and husband by choice.

Mainly to first get my life back in order due to a chaotic life and living with 2 narcissistic parents. And the sudden loss of my dad in 2021. But I’m not ok. And I don’t know what to do with all that.

We also moved cause the cost of living in Hawaii is crazy expensive compared to OK. And so living on permanent disability makes things difficult especially after having a successful career in insurance for over 15 yrs. And also being a successful business woman with zero college degrees, brings my self esteem to nothing.

My anxiety and self confidence has always been all over the place. I have always been this control freak over everything in my life. Like I should be this or that, and have these things accomplished by a certain age etc.

But that all got taken away from me when I got sick in 2017. I got fired from my job that while it was stressful, I was good at it. I was an insurance underwriter for Lloyds of London insuring all kinds of “weird” things. But again - I was good at it!

I brought in $50M in revenue alone. And helped that department meet their gross premium goal for the first time since they started the department.

And before that I worked for Fireman’s Fund as a senior business analyst. And knew everything about everything for every single state of the union where insurance came! I worked in a call center where people would call in (who worked for the company) and would ask for me specifically cause they knew I knew what I was talking about.

Heck my boss would even turn to me to ask about business processes! I trained in our new hires. But the company wasn’t doing well and the parent company decided that it couldn’t take anymore losses due to bad decisions made by underwriting.

And so the parent company based out of Germany absorbed it. And even though I was the best they had, I got fired. Which sucked! I was angry. But I sucked it up and made sure the people who were going to be left behind would be well trained. The sad part is I was up for a management job. Well that job went to the most incompetent person on the team. LOL

Isn’t that life? But now I’m here sick with several mental illnesses and incurable medical illnesses. And making the best of it.

I make YouTube videos and hope I can help people like me. Hoping that when they see me they will see themselves and say hey there’s someone like me, and she’s doing ok. And maybe I can too.

Mental health and chronic illness/pain aren’t talked about enough. It needs to be don’t you think? It needs more of a platform, and that we need to also show people it’s ok to say I’m not ok.

Also I use art therapy to cope. I crochet and I also pour epoxy resin on my channel. I know it’s not that big of a deal but hey you have to start somewhere right?

I’m just wondering who’s listening tho? Really listening.

[iamshay]

One thing people that I have networked with since I came into streaming things all start from blog tv I meet someone idk if that's true what he said to me is only god knows. We have been everywhere. you now bought a blog tv. you now and then +youtube just watching videos. . justin tv, twitch, mixer,trovo now kick. When I knew about streaming these stupid kids were not even born.

I made a connection with people and befriended and today I am still friends with her like a sister from another mother fact we exchanged numbers cuz we connect since blog tv now. we watch each other grow into women. Alongside, I have been associated with people I have traveled around streaming.

These people get ego by dick ride to get famous and they get recognized for the ego getting into their heads. and all sudden they think so fucking highly of themself, they forgot themself. when they nobody it all view botted. the fact is the admin himself. told me this

So this issue is on kick. this admin is a doll. He has been very doll with so far. and came back to when he could. So if they get rid of view botted all these people who think so highly of them will lose their viewership to fucking to 10-15 viewers. They fucking, not train or knut both are ogs from twitch or adin get natural viewers. none of them. So this full issue. as I have posted what I gave context and their multi told their person that knows to code and owns live bot. This kinda behavior ain't going to make kick look good. I am not one making it look bad only those with check mark goes around harassing other because they are butthurt cuz I call them out directly to the person that is view botting 600 views or 200 views their chat fucking dead. they would be like my boat just 10 viewers without a view bot. he try to gaslight me and tell me I am confused. Mr nobody even said he ain't nobody. You got somebody to get fucking target with the view bot. hater usually never want to see anyone successful why would they view a bot when it's so clear you friend the person that owns the live bot. he tries to claim that he ain't allow talk as blame on kick staff. that he is not allowed to tell me how u cheat the system? so that's what he said to me in the DMS.

That is from the admin picture. I am a blurry name cuz he has been a doll. he has done me no wrong. I am fucking call out those people who do me wrong and pretend to be supportive when they are not actually preaching.

I am like you do me wrong I will speak my mind and call you out with receipts. I have blocked all of them.

Pathological lying, also known as mythomania and pseudologia fantastica, is a chronic behavior in which the person habitually or compulsively lies. These lies often serve no obvious purpose other than to paint oneself as a hero or victim, depending on the circumstance.

this is what they all are. Doing the crime and playing the victim when they got zero proof I already leak all the dm. I have not deleted anything. they nickname calling me. I am not perfect but when I am wrong I going to defend myself. I never said I was perfect. nobody is fucking perfect.

As I said, they can twist, and flip the narrator to their liking without fucking proof. that i have harras them. Point my views about how kick left and right getting it cuz they got verified suggestion channel is fucking the dumbest. The thing should be earned. not given. you can see in DMS convo with igypc and i. This thing.

the fact they are willing to click on hot tube streams and sit on their chair with zero life hating on women cuz their content. DONT FUcking watch then. As long they dont show porn. and if that was not allowed I am pretty sure would be not verified or allowed on the kick. These people fucking hypocritical when it's their circle friend that does titties and only fans they are cool with it. But when others dont dick suck them and agree with everything they say. they going for your neck and harassing u.

IF you are a female with logical fucking brain thought kick preach the rules you are mistaken. The fact one of the people harassing brag about knowing Eddie and that if he told Eddie or other higher up he would have my ban. IF that case. They going proof my point. I came to try this platform because I honestly thought I would be felt welcomed and not harassed as I experience on twitch. But the difference about it was twitch actually did something about it when I send screenshots and proof just like I did with this one.

I am not saying Eddie or this owner or higher-ups are like this. I judge people by their actions. if they actually like that this individual aka baba. as you see in the video vod i post on youtube u can hear that guy scream telling his friend to go over and tell that B** what she does.

I am not gonna personally shut up about it. I will tell and show everyone I connect with and my network I know over twitch anyone I meet this what actually encouraged and these streamers all are a group that vouches for each other and gets stupid verified bruh. they are the ones entitled to what they deserve to get without earning it. some of them earn it cuz of their socials got a big following but I notice in discord multi people check saying they got verified and they spam even in general to people that are in the same boat and dont stream that much. just cuz she is helpful I am helpful too. I dont go around asking people to vouch for me. checkmark is fucking badge of verified not a partnership and another hand they say it is. I would put a pass on them msg kick staff for not even give a shit about me because of how hateful they are. the loudest outspoken person they feel threatened.

people don't like me because I am brutally honest and speak my mind. I don't follow fucking trends hate or wave of these big streamers or celebrities. have my own mindset and personality and opinion.

Nobody on that call they did on stream literally was the support they turn the whole shit on me. They flip and twist shit my words that I never said. just cuz she most sub and I know she probably bloc and ban me. and does not handle is m going to call her on it for flip whole attitude her ego has gotten into her head. she never came with an open mind and even if she ask if want join in her chat on the call I said no. That means no. it's like asking a person to be in the same room as their rapist. if you want me to be on the same call as all the guys that were harassing me. and mocking me as me watching the whole vod u can see in her vod real talk vod title. she say a lot and I was in tears. u expect me fucking be able to talk when I am not ready mentally and emotionally to talk about it.

It is an insult to the victim to have him/her explain why the behavior and/or actions of the bully hurt him/her! The behavior/actions of the bully should be self-evident of wrongdoing without the need for the victim to explain how exactly they hurt him/her! Imagine for example bringing a bigot who used offensive and lewd language against another person for several weeks before finally someone stepped in and decided to resolve the conflict. And that person decided that it was a good idea to bring the victim and the bully to a table to discuss things, asking each party to explain how the actions of the other party affected him/her and in doing so, it influenced his/her actions. How would the victim feel talking about how it felt to be subject to demeaning and derogatory remarks that made him/her feel worthless! Shouldn’t the words of the bully alone be condemning enough without having to drag the victim into it?

just fucking imagine how close minds all of them are.

Narcissists tend to twist the facts to make the things they do seem less bad!!!

and this is exactly what they did.

[sweatersarecomfyy]

So I think the question for this year is: how can people be so stupid?

[zivazivc]

Pinocchio AU

Okay people want the explanation for this comic so here it goes. It’s long and complicated and MESSED UP because of course it is, this is me. I’m going to write in points because my small tired brain can’t handle good english atm but basically to sum up the Adrien was a sentimonster theory or Pinocchio AU as I like to call it:

Young married Emilie and Gabriel can’t have kids. Gabriel reluctantly accepts this fate and even brings up adoption as a possibility once, but Emilie doesn’t want to hear any of that. She’s a bit of a Marinette in the sense that she pictures this romanticized ideal life for herself and a child—her flesh and blood—HAS to be in it.

They keep trying to get a baby while other young families Emilie knows keep growing. She feels left out and hurt and depressed, then her newlywed twin sister announces she’s expecting a baby too and something within Emilie just unhinges.

She eventually lies to some of her friends, who she was out for coffee with, that she’s pregnant too. She mostly does it just to see their reaction and feel what it would be like but it quickly spirals out of control where she just starts pretending she’s pregnant until you can’t even tell if she believes it herself.

Gabriel is confused at first because he hears the news second hand (a friend/family member congratulating him) so he’s apprehensive when he approaches his wife but she convinces him that they really are getting a baby and Gabriel is ecstatic.

It’s only later at a doctor’s check up that Gabriel learns that she indeed is not pregnant. The doctor even speaks to him alone explaining that his wife is in denial and that he should make sure she goes to see a psychiatrist, something she definitely wouldn’t do alone.

Gabriel is unsuccessful with that because he’s not entirely persistent, doesn’t want to be the guy with the crazy wife having to tell everyone she lied about being pregnant, and hopelessly believes she’ll just get over it eventually.

That is until her “pregnancy is near due”—her sister already had Félix in England a few months ago—and he stumbles on her transformed with her peacock miraculous (they already have both of them) creating a sentimonster newborn.

They have a huge fight about it but because Emilie refuses to destroy it, won’t tell Gabriel where the amok is, and Gabriel can’t just hurt the baby with his hands, Emilie just… wins. Fucked up, yeah?

Now she tried creating kids before this one, using her imagination to try and blend her and Gabriel’s looks but it just wasn’t working. So she decided to copy of photos of baby Félix because he already looked almost like a copy of his mother, and Amélie and Emilie already looked alike so it’s not so weird?—is what her mind was telling her.

She didn’t dare alter his looks but she decided to give the baby Gabriel’s eye color to include the “father” in some way. (Yes in that comic I made I gave Adrien a mix of green and gray but that was mainly to get the point across to the perceptive readers)

Now we got Adrien, a normal baby boy to the whole world except for Gabriel who’s forced into his wife’s fantasy through social expectations.

Why are we only at this point and this post is already so long AAAAAAAA!!!

Adrien physically basically grows in a way where Emilie just keeps changing his appearance to match what Félix looked like a few months prior.

Mentally he’s like a robot just taking in information without really needing to learn it. So Emilie decides when he says his first word, she decides when he learns to walk,… He knows how to walk, he just wasn’t given the command to do so yet.

But even so he does develop a personality over time, just slower, because unlike a normal child who’s always testing his boundaries, how far they’re allowed to go until they’re in real trouble, Adrien just can’t misbehave. At all.

But he does have his favorite foods and favorite toys, and jokes that make him laugh the most. The problem is just that Emilie could just decide that his favorite food is strawberries and he’d just start acting accordingly, rewiring his belief. 

He also isn’t allowed to argue or be mean to others which is why Félix thinks he’s a goody two-shoes weirdo while Chloé the brat adores him.

This behavior isn’t so hard to hide with a toddler who’s fickle but it’s harder and harder as the kid grows. Which is why the family becomes very secluded over time.

Gabriel always keeps distance with his “son”. He’s not Dad, he’s Father, he doesn’t do hugs and cuddles, he doesn’t say I love you. But Adrien knows he loves him because his mom told him so and he loves him back unconditionally because Mom said that’s what families do.

Now even though Gabriel is traumatized by this whole ordeal and knowing Adrien “isn’t real” freaks him out he does soften a bit over time. I’m going to give an awful example but like someone who hates cats softening for a cat that their partner/roommate decided to get/had from before. Continuing with this example: But still becoming appalled when the cat starts acting odd/unusually.

Okay I think you get the gist. Let’s move on…

Emilie loves her son more and more as he grows and his sentimonster behaviours start bothering her more and more too. She hates being reminded that he’s not a real boy by people mentioning he looks young for his age because Emilie forgot to make him grow for a while. She hates when he does everything like he’s told. She hates that he has no real friends because they’re afraid to expose him to the outside too much and without supervision. She hates to think about his future.

Her desire for him to be real keeps growing and is what drives her to search for a solution in the miraculous spellbook.

She cracks the script after years, when Adrien is nearly a teen, and finds a way to transfer the creators soul into a sentimonster.

It’s a long process that takes time and while she falls ill to everyone around her, Adrien becomes more real.

Gabriel starts realizing what’s happening when he notices Adrien hesitate for a second when he’s playing a video game and Gabriel wants him to do something, groan when he gets bothered watching TV, huff, complain, have slightly opposing opinions to his and Emilie’s, when he argues with his mother when she tells him she’s feeling fine; when he notices his son’s eyes are greener. Or is it all in his head?

He confronts his wife too late, when she’s extremely ill already, her normally vibrant eyes dulled match Adrien’s bluish gray, and he pieces together in his head what she’s doing.

Before Gabriel could properly think what to do to stop the love of his life from turning into a lifeless doll, in a fit of panic he tries to take her wedding band (where he knows Adrien’s amok is) to get rid of Adrien instead, but is unsuccessful in getting it off her so he snatches her peacock brooch instead (which she needs to complete the spell obvs) and breaks it. (Heyoo! broken peacock miraculous. things are coming together)

Because the spell was almost complete anyway it’s Emilie who falls unconscious. But she doesn’t disappear because she’s not a real sentimonster, she just becomes dormant like one.

This is the point in the story where Gabriel makes it seem like Emilie ran away or something like that—basically disappear. Now he’s living knowing he has an almost sentimonster wife in the basement, knowing he almost killed his son (or her), and having to care for a son that suddenly became much more alive, questioning, arguing, angry, screaming, not accepting, crying, grieving, staring at him with Emilie’s eyes.

Instead of becoming a real parent, Gabriel shuts him out.

Soon Adrien evolves desires for socializing, company, getting away from the suffocating home which eventually leads to him going to a public school.

He slowly starts to live life freely without the restrictions that were put around his thoughts.

Gabriel has an even stranger relationship with Adrien now because he still loves him in a way but also holds resentment toward him. But mostly he sees him as something valuable.

The show happens here…  And now finally we get to the comic…

Gabriel gets a hold of the ladybug and black cat miraculouses. (There’s no epic fight in his lair as you see there’s no Ladybug in the comic but that’s not really important)

What’s important is that Gabriel had deciphered the miraculous spellbook with the help of Emilie’s notes and had decided to use the unification’s “wish” power to awaken Emilie.

He’s aware he’ll need to sacrifice something for the wish to come true and he’s certain Adrien should be enough because the soul inside him is literally the one thing Emilie is missing.

✨Adrien (poor boy just lost his miraculous) is taken to Gabriel’s lair, where he finds out his father is Hawk Moth, sees his mother, learns he’s a sentimonster, and that he’s going to become a sacrifice ✨

Of course the last part is not what happens. It’s Gabriel who ends up being sacrificed.

I can’t decide if Gabriel ends up sacrificing himself because he changed his mind in the last moment while Adrien was screaming for him to stop, OR  because he didn’t love Adrien enough for him to be considered an equal exchange for his wife… O.O

But anyhow…

Emilie wakes up with Gabriel’s soul within her (hence the bluish gray eyes in the comic).

Adrien is traumatized for life.

This took me hours to write… I knew there was a reason why I didn’t want to do it. I hope I didn’t forget anything and my brain made sense of it all

Well there you have it, peeps. The Pinocchio AU. It’s as messed up as my sleep schedule. Good night. 

[a-route-up-if-i-fall]

assassins creed headcanons

idc how backed these r by actual canon btw. if u have a different view of these characters, that's completely okay. that's great, even. i'm just sharing mine ._.

altaïr is autistic. he fidgets a lot in private/when he's not "working." when he's ab to assassinate someone, he's hyper-focused and gets almost obsessive about every detail. his life as an assassin is his special interest and he has a waxing and waning hyperfixation on greek philosophy, specifically empedocles. he's demisexual and in love w malik. switch but always ends up bottoming.

ezio is obviously a slut. he likes to refer to himself as a playboy, and some ppl see him as a bit of a womaniser, but in reality he is literally out to give ppl a good time. in that way, he is a little whore of a man. pansexual. non committal but deeply loyal to his friends and fellow assassins.

connor likes to pretend he is stoic but i feel as though he is just shy and socially awkward. he desperately wants to understand the templars, but he finds it so difficult to sympathise with them after everything. i hope he kills colonisers for fun.

edward is secretly (or not so much) into men but refuses to admit it. he's a pirate so he knows all ab buggering let's just b honest. jim gave him like the fright of his life bc he thought he might actually be falling for a man so when she told him she was mary, he had mixed emotions. first, disappointed. next, oh thank jaysus i'm straight. that was not something he was ready to confront.

shay is fucking depressed and has issues w moral perfectionism. he wants to be good but wonders how he can b if he remains loyal to the assassins. he's also secretly not sure if the templars are in the right but thinks siding with them is the way to helping the most ppl. ambition is his fatal flaw. he regrets that things w the brotherhood ended as they did.

arno has an addictive personality. canonically, he's struggled w booze and gambling, but i think it's something that he is constantly fighting. he thought he would never be sober again after élise died, but surprisingly he found that drinking didn't bring him any comfort. he was just empty :(( he is also transmasc and i will not be elaborating.

jacob has adhd (though doesn't know the term for it obviously). one way he manages it is through exercise. so whenever he feels especially unfocused or irritable, he just freeruns the rooftops of london or finds someone to train with/fight. i can't help but imagine him as the jocks at school who ARE allies and would do anything to stand up for his queer friends but says problematic shit sometimes bc he just doesn't know the correct terms or anything. (edit: at the time of posting this i didn't know that he is canonically bisexual. as far as i can tell it was only made clear by one post from ubisoft. and i am disappointed in myself for not realising that. i feel like this is a part of a bigger issue of ambiguous queer storytelling especially in video games. it should have been far more explicit imo. but i'm always happy to see more gay rep)

evie wants to travel. she secretly writes poetry and doesn't show it to anyone. she studies latin for fun. she's really really good at maths actually. she was a bit of a snitch as a kid, but then she grew up and learnt it was better to just keep quiet about stuff she wasn't meant to see. she's a simp.

aya/amunet died before bayek. he had to recover her body from the roman hidden ones. he made sure that she had the best embalmers, a lavish burial chamber. and when he died, the community made sure they were buried together. back in the day, the chamber held scrolls that spoke of amun, with images of sekhmet and horus lining the walls. an earthquake left the tomb in the state u see it in in origins. they're buried not far from the necropolis that holds khemu's body.

kassandra loved her immortality initially. she spent her days doing impulsive things just because she could. only they got stale after a while. the fear of being alone for an unknown amount of time overcame her as she started losing people. until we get to valhalla and she learns that maybe it's okay not to be alone always, but feels like she always has to keep moving.

eivor is gender fluid. she eventually loses her eye, like odin, and despises how it makes her look like him. she never had children. ik that she's canonically into men however i feel its more comphet than genuine attraction. she ends up w randvi.

[thefanficmonster]

Casual

Ranboo x Reader (Female)

Warnings: None, unless talking about the future counts

Genre: FLUFF, Humor, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: Following the arrival of the dreadful invitation to his cousin’s wedding Ranboo turns to the only cover-up he can think of to keep his still-single status hidden from his family.

Requested by Anon. Hi darling! Thank you so much for your wonderful request! I’m so glad you sent your idea to me and I’m so glad you were my first official Ranboo request. I’m really sorry it’s taken me so long to write it but I still hope you’ll come across it and read it! Love, Vy ❤

“Heyyy, so Y/N, I have a favor to ask you...um yeah, call me back, it’s awkward sending it via voicemail. Bye“

Huh - that’s the first thought that goes through my head when I listen to the voicemail left after a missed call from my best friend Ranboo. The favors he usually asks for consist of requesting assistance for his videos in which I also appear with a mask and sunglasses to keep the brand running. I genuinely have nothing against my face being shown but when I think about it, I’m honestly a bit glad people can’t identify me.

Anyways, back to the favors, Ranboo is no stranger to asking me for them but they’ve never been considered too awkward for a voicemail which is why I’m no slightly concerned. I’ve been swamped with work for school and studies for the graduation finals for the past two weeks and it seems like I’ll never get on top of it and I know Ranboo’s been in a similar situation too, so maybe he needs help with that? He’s not used to asking help for school stuff, he sometimes even has a hard time accepting it when I openly offer it to him.

I eventually sigh, decide that playing this guessing game will not get me anywhere and settle on giving him a call as I make my way home from the gym with my legs barely putting up with the task of carrying me around.

He picks up on the second ring.

“Hey! Wh-...“

“Would you pretend to be my girlfriend for my cousin’s wedding next weekend?!“

My legs take that opportunity to stop moving in the middle of the sidewalk which is luckily void of any people at the moment. It’s not my fault my body’s first reaction was to freeze up at the question that came flying at me like an out-of-control jet, almost as though he’s been dying to say it and get it over with.

“Um...run that by me again please, I think I misunderstood.“ I say, blinking blankly as though awoken from a fever dream. No, actually as though I’m IN a fever dream right now.

“Ok, now that the cat’s out of the bag, wanna grab some coffee and talk about it face-to-face. I need to see your facial expressions to gauge what response to expect.“ He says, the previous nervousness gone and his voice calm as regularly once again.

I’m this close to face-palming but I squeeze my eyes tightly shut and bring myself to utter a reply, “Our usual spot. Be there in ten minutes.”

                                                             *  *  *

“No freaking way.“ I shake my head, folding my arms over my chest as I lean back in my seat in the booth we picked when we arrived. Good thing I got an iced coffee cause even a hot one would’ve gone cold by now considering I haven’t yet taken the time to have even a sip of it. I’ve been too busy listening to the long and short of the explanation and begging speech Ranboo probably made last night to try and convince me to agree to this nonsense. “Dude, we’ve been friends since middle school-...“

“Exactly! Who else was I gonna ask?“ He cuts me off, pleading gaze meeting my unimpressed one.

I huff before continuing my previous statement, “We’ve been friends since middle school so you know my opinion on weddings.” I put extra emphasis on the word ‘opinion’, giving him the clear hint at the distaste I’ve expressed on the topic multiple times before.

“And you know we’re on the same page there but there’s no way I can avoid going unless someone kidnaps me.“ He too now gets in the same stance as me, his coffee forgotten too.

I can’t help but snort out a little laugh, “I’d be more than happy to kidnap you considering the other option is far less appealing to me.“

He, of course, rolls his eyes at me as though he didn’t offer to do the same thing so I could avoid an exam but anyways. “So you’re gonna choose to fake a kidnapping that has the potential of landing you in jail over coming to eat some great food and maybe even have some fun at a wedding with your best friend? I’m hurt.“ He says, frowning to cover up the smile that’s fighting its way onto his face.

Now it’s my turn to roll my eyes, “I’d be kidnapping you, dummy...” I cut myself off to let out a long sigh and calm down before I go off at him. His smirk isn’t helping me much with the task either. I’ve known Ranboo long enough to know he’ll eventually convince me and he’s known me long enough to know how to do that exactly. With that in mind, there’s really no point in getting so worked up and wasting my energy. And so, despite my own rationality, I cave. “Fine, but I’m not staying the whole wedding.“

His eyes immediately light up and almost makes me feel the compromise was worth it. Almost. I mean, when you’ve been best friends with someone for so long, seeing them happy is worth more to you than your own comfort sometimes.

And he knows it too. Which is exactly why he outstretches his hand for me to shake and says: “Just one dance and you’re free to go. Deal?”

I take his hand without hesitations. That’s a better offer than I could’ve ever imagined. “Damn straight it’s a deal.“

                                                            *  *  *

“How long until you kick the heels off?“ Ranboo asks, bringing me a non-alcoholic cocktail and sitting down next to me.

I take a sip and giggle, “You kidding? I already kicked them off and replaced them with flats. I need mobility if we dance. They also lower the risk of me severing off a toe of yours if I step on you on accident.”

He laughs, clinking his glass against mine before he gets a bit more serious, “By the way, thanks for handling my family’s attack so well. I know it might’ve been a bit much but you handled it like a pro. Still, I’m sorry on their behalf.”

I shake my head and wave my hand dismissively, “Don’t mention it. I’d probably react the same way if my brother or cousin brought a date to an important family event like this.” I instinctively turn to look in the direction of where the majority of his family has gathered around, chatting with guests, smiling brightly. It’s hard not to immediately take a liking towards these people. They’ve been a second family to me ever since Ranboo and I started hanging out so I completely understand why they were so shocked to see me in the role of his ‘girlfriend’.

“I’ll tell my parents the truth later, our extended family is the ones I wanted to fool to be perfectly honest.“ He looks around as do I and we catch more than a few pairs of eyes fixated on us that turn away when they realize they’ve been spotted, “Mission accomplished by the looks of it.“

I chuckle. I’ve never felt so comfortable at a wedding before. I don’t feel stressed nor anxious despite knowing that there’s quite the number of eyes on me and there are whispers going around about my ‘relationship’ with Ranboo. It’s oddly calming and relaxing to be surrounded by some familiar and some unfamiliar faces. This cocktail is pretty great too.

Speaking of which, if it had any alcohol in it I’d blame it for the decision I’m about to make but this one’s entirely on me: I tap Ranboo with one hand while taking out my phone with the other. “If we’re already the talk of the wedding, let’s give them something to talk about.“ I say as I put up my phone, pretending to be taking a selfie leaning in to give him a kiss on the cheek.

When I pull away I can clearly see that he’s still processing what just happened. I can’t help but burst out in a fit of laughter as I reach out to wipe the lipstick stain I left on his cheek. He looks like a lost, clueless puppy with the question: ‘what on Earth just happened???’ replaying in his head and it’s so freaking cute!

Wait....what was that? Since when do I use the adjective cute to describe Ranboo? Didn’t I think he looks handsome in a suit earlier too? The hell is with me today?

Then it hits me - the feeling isn’t foreign. Like, I know I’ve felt it before but I never analyzed it or even bothered to acknowledge it. But now that I do, I’m afraid of what it might be.

“There!“ I say, desperately trying to push the thoughts away along with this little firework show in my stomach, “Now you have pinker cheeks. Well, cheek, singular.“

As if snapping out of his state of confusion, he returns to Earth with a smirk, “Kiss the other to even it?”

Alright, his blush might not be even but mine now is and it’s ten times as intense and very much apparent but I don’t let the feeling shine through anything else as I proceed to actually kiss his other cheek too, wiping the lipstick stain.

“Thanks. You’re the best.” And just like that, as though it’s no big deal, he kisses my forehead.

See, that’s the thing, it shouldn’t be a big deal! It’s never been! This is far from the first time I’ve kissed him on the cheek or the first time he’s given me a forehead kiss. These are regular occurrences after years of this lovely friendship we have. Why do they feel so different now?

Then, much to my relief, the music starts and the lights turn off leaving only one spotlight for the groom and bride to have their first dance. They look absolutely astonishing and I can certainly say I’ve never before stopped to think that about any newly weds of the weddings I’ve preciously been to. I don’t know if it has something to do with the company I have for this particular wedding or it’s maybe the fact that my mindset’s changed over the years without me realizing.

Then I automatically look at Ranboo who just so happens to be looking at me too and all I can say is: my mindset hasn’t changed.

A loud applause takes over when the couple finish their dance, officially opening the dancefloor for any other pairs who’d like to occupy it and I’m happy to see how many people are eager to rush up with their partner.

 Ranboo gets up, putting the glass down and offers me his hand, “So, wanna dance? Don’t take this as a sign to leave though, we said one dance and you CAN leave, not SHOULD.” He says, giving me a warning look.

I roll my eyes and am about to give him some sass right back but he takes my hand and picks me up from my seat, leading me to the dancefloor.  And I gotta admit maybe it’s a good thing he did. If he left it to me I would’ve probably said no to the dance and ran the hell away. Why? - Cause I’m freaking terrified of this new mindset and point of view and these intense emotions I never used to pay any mind to before in regards to my best friend.

Friends don’t feel that way about friends. Friends don’t look at friends that way. What’s happening to me?

When I gotta look him in the eyes like this, not for the first time might I add, I can finally understand how the friends-to-lovers trope works: it’s all meaningless until it starts to mean so much to you. It’s all platonic until it reminds you of a romantic movie moment. It ‘best friends’ until it’s ‘I wish we were more than that’. It’s all casual, until it’s not.

And, unfortunately, it’s irreversible.

Damn do I wish I ran away now...

[soulmate-game]

Harley’s Plea for Help: Chapter 2

Chapter 1

“How long do you think it’s gonna take before she decides to sneak out?” Nightwing asked over his comms, lazily leaning against the balcony railing in front of him with his head resting on one hand.

“Dude, I started sneaking out almost twenty minutes ago,” a girl’s voice made Nightwing squeak and turn around, to reveal a teenage girl leaning against the door that led to the balcony he was on. “I didn’t want to draw attention to myself by doing unnecessarily showy gymnastics down from my hotel room’s balcony, no matter how much fun that would be, so I just snuck out one of the hotel’s back exits. Then I looked up to admire the moon and saw you here, staking out what is clearly my suite, and decided to come pay you a visit.”

“How long have you been there? And how did you even get behind me? I hope you didn’t break and enter, that’s an actual lived-in apartment behind us right now,” Nightwing asked, turning around to analyze the daughter of Harley Quinn for the first time in person.

She looked just like in her pictures, of course. Jet black hair like her father’s, except it seemed to have a bluish shine in the light. And her eyes were definitely Harley’s— thank goodness for that —vibrant blue and clearly analyzing him with the same amount of intensity as his did her. He had to bite back a chuckle. In a turn of complete irony, she really did look like a Wayne kid. Fit all of Bruce’s usual criteria to be adopted. But she was tiny, even smaller than Harley’s lithe form. He, Bruce, and Tim were of the hypothesis that the exposure both her parents had to Ace Chemical’s vats of acid likely had an effect on her DNA that stunted her growth. Perhaps there were other effects that they wouldn’t be able to figure out until they got to know her better, too, though it was clear that her skin was a likely one. It wasn’t unnaturally pale like her parent’s after their acid dips but it was paler than normal for sure, just a shade or two shy of being paper white.

And he could see, now, what Harley meant when she referred to Marinette as a powerhouse. It wasn’t very noticeable in pictures, but up close Dick could see the carefully honed muscle of an acrobat curling over her otherwise slim build. Combined with the knowledge that Marinette had been taught at least some serious self defense from a young age, he could see how such a tiny package could be a remarkable threat when necessary.

Marinette grimaced as the other Batfam, who were all nearby staking out her room from different angles, dropped onto the large balcony with them.

“Uh, well. I didn’t break and enter, I rather not get off to a criminal-ly start on my first night in Gotham, you know? But I realized that even though I was able to figure out the exact room you were staking me out from, I realized as soon as I got into the first floor of the building that I had no idea how to actually get to you. So I just climbed the stairs all the way to the roof and scaled my way down to this balcony, and pretended I’ve been here for a while when really I was barely able to hear you ask when I was gonna sneak out. I’m still out of breath, actually,” she put a hand on her chest and sure enough her breathing was still slightly fast. But not enough to be worrying or even all that noticeable. Yet another piece of evidence to show that she was a very active individual and had resistance built up to physical activity.

“Yup,” Robin groused grumpily, crossing his arms. “With all that rambling, you couldn’t be anyone else’s child but Quinzel’s.”

Marinette’s face immediately flushed pink all the way to her ears. “I’m sorry! I’ve been trying so hard to quit that habit, too!” She grumbled a bit to herself, putting her face in her hands. They all chuckled at the display. Red Hood ambled over, draping his arm over her shoulders (he nearly had to bend in half to do it, the height difference was that bad).

“As adorable as your freak out is, why’d you even come up here anyway? There’s no way you’d scale down a ten-story building just to say hello.”

She let out a heavy sigh at that, slowly peeling her face out of her hands. “Yeah, I recognized you guys right away. And honestly, as much as Momma Harley would be super proud of me for managing to give an entire group of vigilantes the slip, she’d also ground me for life if she found out that I saw you guys and still snuck away even though she probably swallowed her pride and asked you guys to babysit me, right? Self preservation. Contrary to popular belief, I do actually have some.”

“Wait,” Red Robin held up a hand, brows clearly furrowed under his cowl. “You expected her to ask for our help?”

“Well,” she made a so-so motion with her hand. “I didn’t think of it beforehand, but it all clicked once I saw Nightwing. I know how much my mom is worried about me, especially since you-know-who broke out a few days ago. She is more than worried enough to ask you guys for help. Even if she does complain about you guys, a lot actually, she also has made it clear that she trusts you guys with the stuff that actually matters.

“‘You know who’?” Batman repeated, arms crossed. If Marinette squinted, she thought there might have been a grin on his lips. “Is that how you always refer to him?”

“What else am I gonna call him?” she asked, face going deadpan. “Sperm donor? Source of a large amount of my self doubt and depreciation? The prime reason I haven’t been able to see my mom in person more often over the years? Oh, I know! How about I just always refer to him as ‘that bastard I wanna punch,’? That sounds good!” she rolled her eyes sarcastically. “Only one person in this world has the right to be considered my father in any capacity, and it sure as hell isn’t him. Genetics notwithstanding.”

Red Hood straight up guffawed at that, landing several rough pats on her back that made the girl stumble a bit. “Yep, I like this one! But as fun as it would be to see you give that jackass a mean left hook, it’s better if he never finds out who you are or knows that you’re here,” the vigilante’s voice got dark and serious very quickly. “He doesn’t forget people he finds interesting easily, and if he ever finds out about the connection you have to him, he’ll be a constant threat in your life.”

“I know,” Marinette agreed with a nod. “And if this conversation was happening two years ago, I’d say that my mom’s concerns aren’t unfounded. That I am too easily emotionally compromised and despite my deep seated issues and hatred for that man, I couldn’t guarantee he would be unable to get to me.”

Batman straightened up, as did all of his sons around him. None of them had missed the ‘if’ there. Batman’s voice went from charmingly deep to it’s usual gruff grumble. “What changed in two years?”

They all watched as Marinette gulped, taking a deep breath as she stalled for time, looking out at the view on the balcony before seeming to steel herself and return her gaze to Batman’s. When she did, it was suddenly full of iron will.

“I didn’t lie when I told Mom that I came to visit her— but that isn’t the whole truth, either. If I just wanted to visit her in Gotham, I would have waited until I was eighteen like we agreed. But I can’t wait, Paris can’t keep going on like this. I entered that contest because it was the fastest way to see you. I didn’t know if I would win, but… I had to take the chance. There was no way I’d be able to get to Gotham behind my mom’s back otherwise.”

“What are you talking about?” Robin hissed, stepping up to his father’s side. “Paris has been silent. If anything were happening, we would have heard about it by now.”

“No, you wouldn’t,” Marinette corrected, never losing that ironclad look in her eyes. “Because a combination of magic and politics is keeping it quiet. No news about Paris’ situation is able to leave the city limits. Magic makes any non-native who leaves Paris think that everything they experienced was just a crazy dream. Natives won’t forget, but politics has all of us under very strict NDAs if we leave city boundaries, and all of our local news and social media is blocked from being accessed by anyone outside the city. But, I figured a little breaking of the rules wouldn’t exactly put a stain on my family’s reputation or anything, so,” she dug in her pocket and pulled out a thumb drive, holding it up for all of them to see. She swallowed again, but never stopped her eye contact with Batman. She held out the thumb drive.

“I came to Gotham to ask for your help. This sped things up, I didn’t expect to see you on my first night here, but two years in Hawkmoth’s Paris has really taught me how to roll with the punches. This,” she shook the thumb drive. “Holds videos of every fight since HawkMoth first showed up. It has all the information I’ve gathered over two years, tracks his movements and lists all his targets and— everything. But I’m not a detective, I’m a designer. I make clothes, I spar on the weekends, I am not good at getting evidence to prove that someone is a magic-abusing villain holding an entire city hostage.”

“We’re gonna need some details, Little Q,” Red Hood finally removes his arm from around her shoulders, instead crossing his arms and looking down at her sternly. “If your city has a villain holding it hostage, is anyone fighting him? And if you do have someone fighting him, why don’t you need our help, or why didn’t they call the Justice League? The JLE should be in Paris, right?”

Marinette snorted, face scrunching up in obvious distaste. “I’ll have to answer those a little out of order. First; the JLE was kicked out of Paris. They moved their headquarters to Italy about five years ago, I’m just surprised they apparently kept that secret from you,” she gestured to all of them, who indeed seemed very caught off guard by that tidbit. But Marinette just sighed and continued. “Though that’s a good thing, actually. We do have heroes, it started out as just a pair but it’s grown into a small team out of necessity. They didn’t call the Justice League because the last thing we need is any powered heroes coming in and making it worse— your league doesn’t have the best reputation for letting newer heroes take the lead even on their home turf, you know,” she pointed out, which made Batman shift a bit guiltily. He knew the JL was often a bit… heavy handed in their methods.

“What makes the situation so bad that you don’t want to bring experienced heroes into it?” Red Robin cut in, sounding as if the whole situation was a puzzle he was determined to sort out. Which, really, was exactly what Marinette had been counting on. She shot him a finger gun, grinning.

“That’s exactly the point! Hawkmoth uses a magical artifact, like I said— but this artifact can brainwash anybody who experiences even the slightest negative emotion. Sadness, anger, fear— anything negative. And it gives them powers, but puts them largely under his influence,” her expression twisted again, this time into a wry little grimace. “I guess you can say that my momma’s psychiatry background has secretly come in handy a lot over these past two years. And Hawkmoth is exactly why I try to tell Momma Harley to stop visiting me— I have worked my butt off to keep her from finding out about his attacks or getting Akumatized. Every time she shows up it gives me a heart attack!”

“Akumatized?”

Marinette waved a hand dismissively. “It’s the term used for when someone is turned into a super powered villain because of HawkMoth. The brainwashing— really it’s more similar to a straight up corruption. The person usually lacks their usual moral compass, and just seeks to soothe whatever set off their negative emotion in the first place. Usually, that means they seek a bloody revenge. And if someone who already has extensive training or extremely strong powers gets Akumatized, guess what?” She made jazz hands even though her face was deadpan. “Extra powers, or amplified ones, for the metas or superheroes who are Akumatized. And imagine what someone with, say, Batman’s level of experience could do if he had powers and no moral compass,” the silence that followed her words was deafening. She just nodded, knowing she had gotten her point across. “I’ve been working my butt off to stay positive, because if I’m Akumatized…” her shoulders fell, and she had to swallow a lump in her throat. “... I have no idea what I’d turn into, but if you take into consideration both my training and my family history… it’s really best if we never find out what kind of magic-powered supervillain I’d make.”

“So, let me get this straight,” Nightwing said after another long moment of silence for that to all sink in. He gestured at her with an open palm. “You’ve been dealing with a terrorist for two years who targets emotional vulnerability, you apparently have never been corrupted by this magic at least to present day, but your mother still worries about you being very emotionally fragile. And your heroes are not detectives, which is clearly what you need or you wouldn’t have asked us for our help.”

Marinette nodded. “I used to be very impressionable. At the start of all this, I was a huge people-pleaser. I got attached to new people in a matter of minutes. My mom always said I reminded her too much of herself— but two years of fighting off a guy trying to get into my head—“

“Wait,” Batman nearly barked, taking a step forward. “He’s been targeting you? You specifically?”

Marinette nodded grimly, mouth a straight line. “Not from the beginning, but this past year it’s been painfully obvious. He might be able to sense the strength of people’s emotions, and unfortunately I don’t exactly experience my emotions very… gently. All of my emotions tend to the much more intense side of the spectrum. If that’s true, then he might know that any negative emotion I feel will make an extremely strong Akuma. Either that, or he’s going by process of elimination. All of my friends, except for one, have been Akumatized already. So has my Papan and my grandmother. But it’s obvious when he’s targeting someone, I’ve felt him try to override my will on several occasions. But I can’t just repress all of my negative emotions forever, so consider us working against the clock right now. That thumb drive has all the details you need about our heroes, how exactly Hawkmoth’s powers work, and so on.”

“Do your heroes know you’re asking for our help?” Red Robin asked, gaze burning a figurative hole through Marinette’s face. “Better yet, if this drive has as much information as you say it does, how did you get it?”

Marinette handed the drive over to Batman, who finally took it and tucked it in his belt as she answered.

“Momma Harley might have a lot to say about your detective skills, but you are all still strangers to me. So consider this a test of your abilities— I expect that you will all go to extreme lengths to verify all of the information I gave you anyway. After all, I’m still the daughter of your most hated enemy. Right?” She met each of their gazes, one by one, with a challenging one of her own. “You’ll just have to figure out my connection to the heroes on your own. And how I got the information, too. It shouldn’t be too hard for the so-called world’s greatest detectives. And maybe this can double as a trust exercise. I fully expect you guys to scour through every inch of my past, and dig up everything you can on me. I encourage you to try to find everything you can, so that hopefully you can decide to trust me on your own once you have all the details laid out in front of you. By the way, for your own sanity? I’d start with reading about all of our heroes’ powers and abilities before you watch any footage of past attacks.”

Red hood rocked back on his heels, trading glances with the other vigilantes before they all shared a nod. Apparently having decided their course of action, Red Hood leaned down and hoisted Marinette up into a princess carry. All traces of her previous iron will melted away in favor of the high pitched squeal of surprise she gave, and once more she became an overly flustered teenager.

“Alright, little cutie. Let’s get you to your mom’s place before she and her crazy plant lady fiancé come hunting us down.”

“I can walk! I can freerun on my own! Mon dieu please let me down! Eeeeek!” She squealed again as Robin slapped a domino mask over her eyes and Red Hood wasted no time jumping over the balcony railing with her still in his arms. The fact that they were lowered down by a wire wrapped around Hood’s waist didn’t seem to take away any of the fright that came with a sudden drop over an eighth-story balcony.

Part 1

@emotionalsupportginger @alysrose-starchild @emistar0 @kibastray @justanotherfanficlovinbitch @alyssadeliv @blackroserelina @blackstarlight-co @readingalldaysleepingallnight @maanae @aespades @jaybird-and-co @fleursroses @probably-a-hologram @misterpianoman (didn’t work sorry)

[fics-n-stuff]

A Nice Christmas

Thanks to @gayhistorynerd for the prompt, see here (I kind of deviated from it a little maybe a lot but the story still stemmed from this prompt)

Pairing: Wilhelm × Simon

Summary: Wilhelm may have denied being in the sex tape, but that doesn't mean that the world has forgotten. The Christmas break proves to be difficult for both Simon and Wilhelm, one suffering from ongoing harassment and the other feeling completely isolated, and they find that they can't help but be drawn back to each other.

Word Count: 4.5k

A/N: This took me so long to write because I got writer's block right after I started it. This doesn't have a super happy ending because I wanted to try and keep it pretty realistic, but it is pretty sweet and wholesome.

Taglist: @probablyprocrastinatingrightnow @rika90 @angelwilhelm

Wilhelm had never felt more alone than he did being home for Christmas break. He spent as much time as was physically possible holed up in his bedroom, not wanting to see or talk to anyone, especially not his mother. He hadn’t turned his phone on for three days, he had bitten his nails down to the nailbeds and he hardly had any appetite. The ache in his chest was constant and unyielding.

He lay in the dark most of the time, his curtains closed throughout the day and only sometimes opened at night to let the moonlight in. Besides that, he didn’t have much idea of how time was passing.

He did know that it was Christmas eve though. And it must be the morning because nobody had come to drag him out of his bedroom to join the celebrations. A cursory peek around the curtain confirmed that, as Wilhelm saw that the sun hadn’t even fully risen yet.

A deep breath settled the stone in his stomach, and he reached for his phone with a shaky hand.

When the device turned on it immediately started going crazy with notifications, and Wilhelm felt his heart rate increase with every buzz.

5 messages from August

Ignore.

10 messages from Mamma

Ignore.

2 missed calls from Felice

Wilhelm paused in swiping away the notifications. Felice had called him twice and sent him three messages. He clicked on the message notification, sitting back against the wall and holding in a breath without realising it.

Felice: Hey Wille, how are you feeling being home?

Felice: I just wanted to check in but I can’t get a hold of you, I hope you’re doing alright

Felice: You probably don’t want to talk but you can call or text me whenever you do

Wilhelm sighed. Of all the people that he thought that he could depend on, Felice was the only one that he still had. He swallowed the lump in his throat and called her back.

It rang for a while before she answered, and he’d almost decided to hang up the call when it stopped ringing.

“Wille, good morning.” Felice greeted, cheerful but clearly tired. “Merry Christmas.”

“Yeah, merry Christmas Felice.” Wilhelm replied feebly. His voice was hoarse from disuse.

“Are you alright? Do you want to talk about something?”

“Uhm, I- I don’t know, I just... I don’t know.” He stuttered, wrapping his free arm around himself.

“Okay, well, what are your plans for today?”

“I’m not sure, I haven’t really been talking to anyone. What, uh, what are your plans?”

“Oh, you know, just the usual. We’ll watch Kalle Anka's Jul and play some games before dinner, then we’ll open presents.” She explained. The tinny sound of her voice through the phone was actually quite calming.

“What about for the rest of the break?”

“Um, I’m going to New York to see Maddie for New Year, so that’ll be fun. And I’m going back to Bjärstad on Boxing Day to see Sara. I’m gonna stay there just for one night.”

“So you’ve been talking to Sara a lot then?” Wilhelm questioned, moving to bite at his almost non-existent nails.

“Yeah, of course.”

“Has she said anything about Simon? Do you know if he’s alright?” His words came out more rushed than he had intended. Clearly, he was more eager for some sort of information on Simon than he had thought.

“Um, she hasn’t said much but I think he’s pretty okay.” Felice replied, but it was followed by a small sigh that let Wilhelm know that there was more to the story. “Sara says that things have mostly gone back to normal, but Simon goes out a lot less and she’s had to make her Instagram private. I think they’ve had a few people show up at their house.”

Wilhelm swallowed hard, a feeling of guilt crawling under his skin. Simon’s Instagram account had been private ever since the video had been leaked, so it seemed that now people had found Sara’s too. They had attention on them that they had never signed up for, and Wilhelm knew that it was his fault and he felt terrible for that.

“Okay.” He replied shakily. There was a short silence before Felice spoke again.

“How are you, Wilhelm? Really?” She asked.

“Lonely.” He answered. “Listen, I have to go. I need to take a shower before someone comes demanding that I take part in the Christmas celebrations.”

“Alright well, call me back whenever, okay?”

“Yeah, okay. Bye, Felice.”

“Bye, Wille. Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas.”

Wilhelm ran a hand over his face, letting out a groan of frustration and sadness. Why couldn’t he just be a normal kid?

He stared down at his phone in his lap, gnawing at the nail of his right thumb in contemplation. With a shaking breath and trembling fingers, he picked it back up, opened his conversation with Simon and typed a short message. He dropped his phone in mild panic as soon as he hit send, and rubbed his hand over his chest as he took a deep, steadying breath.

+ + +

“Simon, wake up. Rosh and Ayub will be here soon.” Sara’s voice stirred Simon from his sleep and he rolled over to look at her. She was already dressed.

“What time is it?” He asked with a yawn.

“Nine o’clock. Get up and come help with breakfast.”

“Yeah, yeah. I’m getting up.”

Sara rolled her eyes and left the room, and Simon reached out to his bedside table blindly until his hand landed on his phone. He squinted at the screen as he sat up, faltering when he saw the notification on the screen.

Wilhelm: Merry Christmas Simon

He felt his heart race as he stared at the screen, only snapping out of it when he heard Sara shouting at him from downstairs. He blinked, dropped his phone and set about getting dressed.

Every Christmas eve since they were ten, Simon, Sara, Rosh and Ayub would have breakfast together and then go for a long walk. It was tradition for them at this point, but Simon found himself unable to feel excited for it this year. It was all well and good to pretend like life was going on as normal, but it was hard not to feel uncomfortable when people stared at him everywhere he went.

Rosh and Ayub arrived just as he and Sara were finishing up making breakfast, and they exchanged Christmas well-wishes as they sat down to eat.

“You’re being real quiet over there, Simme. You alright?” Ayub asked after a while, and Simon realised that he’d been completely zoned out.

“Sorry, just thinking.”

“About Wilhelm?” Sara questioned. Simon pushed a bite of food into his mouth and shrugged.

“You have to move on, Simon.” Rosh said. “I know you care about him but he’s not worth all the trouble that he comes with.”

“I know. That’s why I ended things.” He replied. “It still sucks though.”

“You’ll get over him eventually.” Sara told him, putting a comforting hand on his for a few seconds before going back to her food. Simon smiled slightly.

He didn’t tell them about the text.

Despite all of that, he was in high spirits when they set out for their walk, happily joking and laughing with his friends, and they made it half an hour before he heard the first comment.

“That’s the guy from the sex tape.” Muttered a girl to her friend as they passed, and Simon felt the smile fall from his face.

“Just ignore them.” Sara told him, wrapping an arm around one of his. He nodded, but it had gotten to him. For the rest of their walk from that point, Simon felt like every person that they passed was looking at him and judging him.

They walked both Rosh and Ayub back to their houses before heading back to theirs just a bit past noon. They had almost gotten home when they were approached by a group of teenagers probably slightly younger than them.

“Are you the guy from that viral sex tape?” One of the boys asked unabashedly, the group coming right up in front of Simon and Sara and blocking their path.

“Uh, I don’t want to talk about that.” Simon replied stiffly, still trying to be polite.

“Oh my god, it is him!” A girl exclaimed.

“Was it actually the crown prince in the video?” Another chimed. Simon felt lightheaded.

“He already said that it wasn’t.” He deflected, trying to sidestep the group.

“Yeah, but there’s a lot of people that don’t actually believe him.” The girl laughed; actually laughed, as if this hadn’t been an earth shattering event for Simon.

“If it wasn’t Prince Wilhelm then who was it in the video?” A boy asked, and that was when Simon spotted the phone filming him and his stomach dropped.

“I’m not discussing my sex life with a bunch of strangers.” He scoffed in disbelief, shouldering his way past the group with Sara close behind him. “Please leave me alone.”

“You could just tell us if it was actually the prince or not.” One of them pressed, the group now following after Simon. “If it wasn’t him then you don’t have anything to hide.”

“Oh my god, did the royal family pay you off? Did they make you sign an NDA!?”

“Were you, like, boyfriends? Or was it just a hookup?”

Simon kept walking, keeping his head down and not answering any of the questions being hurled at him. He could sense that Sara was just as tense beside him. The group followed them for a full block before Simon finally lost his cool and came to a dead stop, turning to face them.

“I’m not going to answer your questions. The fact that you’re following me is not going to make me answer your questions. I’ve had my privacy majorly invaded once already and now you’re invading it again. I’m trying to enjoy Christmas with my sister and you’re chasing me with a camera, I’m sick of people harassing me.” He fumed, making sure to meet the eye of every one of them at some point. “Whatever you choose to believe is not my problem. It doesn’t matter whether you think that the crown prince is telling the truth or you choose to make up some type of theory, I deserve my privacy.”

He didn’t wait for any type of response before he turned around and walked away, thankful to find that they weren’t going to follow him anymore.

“You handled that well.” Sara said quietly once they had turned the next corner. Simon didn’t reply.

When they got home, he went straight upstairs without a word. He slammed his bedroom door shut and buried his face in his pillow, unable to hold the tears back any longer.

By that same evening, the video was viral.

+ + +

I bet that girl was right and the royal family made him sign an NDA

If he didn’t want people to think it was the prince he would have just said that it wasn’t so either the prince was lying or this guy is seeking attention

He’s literally a kid why can’t people just leave him alone??

I don’t care if it was the prince in the tape or not, this guy is hot

The way he said that people are making up theories makes me think that it actually wasn’t the prince in the video

I feel bad for this guy, getting followed around like that must suck

Wilhelm scrolled through the captions and comments on the seemingly endless posts of the video of Simon, feeling like somebody had a vice grip on his heart.

The first time he saw the video had been right after Christmas Eve dinner. He’d had a full blown panic attack and locked himself in the bathroom for half an hour. When he came out, his mother had tried to talk to him about the politics of the situation and he had immediately retreated into his bedroom once again. He missed Erik desperately.

He hadn’t been able to sleep, he'd only gotten about three hours of broken, fitful sleep all night, and now he couldn’t pry himself away from his phone. He knew that it was bad for him, he knew that it was making him feel terrible, but he wanted to know what people were saying.

He had been hesitant to text Simon, especially since he hadn’t received a reply to the merry Christmas text that he had sent in the morning, but in the end he mustered the courage to reach out. He had asked how Simon was doing and apologised for getting him into this situation. He wasn’t surprised when no answer came.

Christmas day was proving to be probably the worst day of Christmas break for Wilhelm. His chest felt like it was bursting open and like it was an empty chasm at the same time. He didn’t eat breakfast or lunch, he didn’t respond to the knocks that came at his door. He felt like he was trapped in a glass box and someone was shaking it.

Wilhelm didn’t know how long he had been scrolling through multiple different social media platforms when his phone buzzed in his hand and an incoming call appeared on the screen. He faltered, sitting up and almost dropping his phone, when he saw that it was Simon. He ran a nervous hand through his hair as he raised the phone to his ear.

“Simon?” He croaked.

“Hi, Wilhelm.” The reply came through the phone, and Wilhelm felt his shoulders relax at the sound of Simon’s voice.

“Hi. H-how are you.” He fumbled, and Simon sighed on the other end.

“I’m okay, I guess. As okay as I can be after... well, you know.”

“Yeah, I know. I’m sorry for putting you in this situation.”

“This wasn’t your fault, Wille.” Simon muttered. “I just wish things were different.”

“Why, um... why did you call?” Wilhelm asked. There was a short stretch of silence that rung in his ears before Simon answered.

“I just wanted to hear your voice, I guess.” He confessed, and Wilhelm couldn’t help the soft smile that pulled at his lips. “Honestly, I was kind of surprised that you didn’t delete my number or something.”

“Why would I have done that?”

“I don’t know, I guess I just thought that you weren’t supposed to have any ties with me since you said that it wasn’t you in the video.” Wilhelm winced at that.

“It's not like my contacts list is available to the public.” He replied, trying to keep his tone light. “I’m not gonna let that kind of thing get in my head again.”

“Is your mum mad?” Simon asked, and now it was Wilhelm’s turn to sigh.

“I’m not sure, I kind of shut myself in my room so that I wouldn’t have to deal with her.” He answered tiredly. “How is your family?”

“Uh, shaken. Sara’s off in her own world with her sketchbooks and mamá can’t go for more than an hour without checking on us both, but we’re handling it.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologise.”

There was a silence again. Wilhelm ran his hand across his leg, back and forth in a soothing motion, not sure what he should say but not wanting the conversation to finish. In the end, Simon spoke first.

“Did you mean it, what you said before you left for the break?” He asked softly.

“Yeah, I did.” Wilhelm answered without hesitation. “I know it wasn’t a good time to say it, and you probably didn’t want to hear it, but I just had to say it out loud. At least once.”

Silence again. Wilhelm heard Simon sigh, and pursed his lips nervously.

“I miss you.” Simon said.

“I miss you too.” Wilhelm replied with a nervous yet relieved chuckle. “I miss you a lot.”

Another pause.

“Where do we go from here, Wille?” Simon whispered.

“I don’t know.” Wilhelm mumbled. “But I... I want to fix this. Or at least just try to fix it. You don’t deserve to be harassed like this, and it’s my fault and I feel terrible.”

“It’s not your fault.” Simon reassured with a sigh. “It was everything else. We still didn’t do anything wrong, and that includes you.”

“No, I did. I promised we would be in this together and I broke that promise.”

“I understand why you did it. And I’m not mad at you. Honestly, having thought about it, you probably made the best decision for my sake too. I mean, I’m getting harassed enough as it is already. I can’t imagine what it would be like if you had told the truth.”

“I’m still sorry anyway.” Wilhelm said softly, and Simon chuckled. “So, um, Felice told me she was visiting Bjärstad tomorrow.”

“Yeah, her and Sara have gotten close. It’s nice, you know, that Sara’s made friends. And Felice is cool.”

“Yeah, she’s great.”

There was silence again, and Wilhelm bit at his nails thinking that Simon was done with the conversation.

“Are you alright, Wille?” Simon asked after a while. “I know this is your first Christmas without Erik, and I guess things with your mum might be a little... well, I just hope you’re okay.”

Wilhelm swallowed. He could lie, pretend he was fine and wave away Simon’s concerns, but he knew the lie probably wouldn’t hold up. Or he could tell the truth and admit how painfully lonely he was, how much he hated being home because the palace felt empty without Erik and how much he longed to be with Simon with every fibre of his being.

“I’m coping.” He sighed, settling for a middle ground of vagueness. “It’s lonely here. The ceilings feel too high.”

“Have you had stuff to do?”

“No, not really. I haven’t really been in the mood for Christmas, but I guess none of us are particularly festive this year anyway.”

“Would you - I mean, if you would even be allowed to, but maybe if you could – would you want to come down here for a day?” Simon asked, and Wilhelm could just picture him fidgeting nervously as he stumbled over his words. The image brought a smile to his face.

“Yeah, I’d like that.” He answered softly. “I’ll try and convince my parents.”

+ + +

Going to Simon’s house had been an absolute no go with his parents. “Just too risky” his mother had said. However, with enough persistence, he managed to wear them down to a compromise.

That was how he ended up in a car on his way back to Hillerska the day after Boxing Day. While Simon’s house had been absolutely off the table, it would be easy enough to get back to Hillerska without being seen. The only people who were there during the break were security and the people who came to take care of the horses.

He had been worried at first that the inconvenience of it would make Simon not want to bother, but when he texted to ask if it was okay he had been met with a quick agreement.

A security guard unlocked the door for him when they arrived, sworn to secrecy of course, and he headed up to his room to wait. He didn’t realise he was biting his nails until there was a knock at the door and he was knocked out of his anxious thoughts.

The door opened slowly, and Wilhelm felt like all of the air was knocked out of his body when he saw Simon step inside, dressed in his beloved purple hoodie under the coat that he took off and draped over the back of a chair that was within reach. The door clicked shut behind him, and silence hung in the air.

“Hey.” Simon greeted finally, and Wilhelm took a deep breath as if he was just remembering how to breathe at all.

“Hey.” He echoed. “How are you?”

“Better.” Simon nodded. “Did you get into a fight with your parents?”

“Yeah, kinda.” Wilhelm muttered. “It’s fine though.”

Simon crossed the room and took a seat beside Wilhelm on the edge of the bed, a good few inches of space between them. It felt like miles.

“You look tired.” Simon commented.

“I’ve been having a hard time sleeping.” Wilhelm replied weakly, eyes downcast, fidgeting with his hands. “I get that way sometimes. It’s fine.”

“Is it?”

He looked over to find Simon watching him, and he practically crumbled under his gaze. He took a very unsteady breath and shook his head.

“No, it sucks.” He mumbled. His hand drifted back up to his mouth and he gnawed on the nail of his thumb nervously.

“Wille, you’re bleeding.” Simon said, gently grabbing his wrist and pulling his hand away from his mouth. Wilhelm looked down at his thumb and saw a bit of blood pooling in the side of the nailbed, becoming aware of the taste of it on his tongue.

“Oh, I didn’t notice.”

“How much have you been biting your nails?” Simon questioned, pulling Wilhelm’s hand towards him to get a look at them. Every nail was jagged and uneven, bitten down to stubs. The skin around them had been bitten at too.

“I don’t know, I do it without realising.” Wilhelm shrugged. “Probably a lot.” He resisted the urge to curl his fingers around Simon’s hand and blinked back the tears that threatened to fall.

“You shouldn’t have to bottle everything in, you’re destroying yourself.” Simon murmured.

“I don’t have anyone to talk to.” Wilhelm’s voice broke halfway through his sentence, a single tear managing to fight its way from his eye. “I used to be able to talk to Erik about at least some of it but now he’s gone and I don’t have anyone, and sometimes it feels like the ground is falling out from under me and I just don’t know what to do.”

He didn’t notice that he was hyperventilating until Simon pulled him into his arms. Wilhelm’s chest was tight, rising and falling rapidly against Simon’s body. Simon's arms were wrapped around him tightly, and Wilhelm was suddenly overwhelmed with how much he had been craving a hug as his hands grasped at the back of Simon’s hoodie and he hid his face in the crook of Simon’s neck.

Wilhelm had always been told not to cry. Ever since he was a child, whenever he began to cry he was told to stop. The seed had planted itself in him when he was very young, but the fear of letting himself cry didn’t truly grow until he once saw an article in a tabloid. He was barely eleven and he had fallen and hurt himself at an event. He had hardly cried, just a few tears and red cheeks, but the tabloid had had plenty to say about it. He hadn’t let himself properly cry since, except for when Erik died. Even then, he had waited until he was completely alone before he let his weakness show. But now, with Simon, he felt an overwhelming need to let his tears fall.

“I’m so sorry.” He whispered into Simon’s shoulder. He could feel the tears coming out of his eyes but they weren’t falling down his face, instead absorbing into the fabric of Simon’s hoodie.

“It’s okay.” Simon soothed, a hand moving up to stroke over the Wilhelm’s hair.

“I never wanted any of this. I never wanted to be a prince.”

“I know.”

“I just wanted to feel normal. Just for once.” Wilhelm said through his tears. “You made me feel normal.”

Simon furrowed his eyebrows, sympathetic. He loosened his hold on Wilhelm and leaned back, sliding the hand that was on the back of Wilhelm’s head forward to rest against his cheek.

“You made me feel normal too.” He replied softly. “At school I was a social outcast because I’m not rich, and at home I have to take care of my mom and Sara. When I was with you, I didn’t feel like I had to take care of anyone or watch where I was stepping. Well, except that one night.” Wilhelm huffed a slight laugh at the comment, lifting a hand to wipe the tears off of his cheeks. “I’ve never seen you cry before.” Simon commented.

“I’m not supposed to.” Wilhelm replied with an awkward chuckle, his head tipping forward in embarrassment. Simon sighed through his nose and lightly touched his forehead to Wilhelm’s.

“You have to cry sometimes, Wille. Everyone cries.”

“I’m not supposed to be everyone.”

“Okay, but sometimes you need to stop worrying about what you’re supposed to be.” Simon told him. “I know you know that.”

Wilhelm took a deep breath. This close to Simon’s face, he could feel his breathing too. He wanted to kiss him, but he didn’t know if that would be okay. He nodded slightly, covering Simon’s hand on his cheek with his own.

“Yeah.” He breathed.

When Simon leaned forward and connected their lips Wilhelm responded automatically, though it took his brain a few seconds to catch up. Once his brain did catch up, his hand took hold of the back of Simon’s neck and pulled him impossibly closer, holding onto this moment like it was his last. Maybe it would be the last time he got to kiss Simon; he couldn’t know. He hoped it wouldn’t be.

“Thanks for coming to see me.” Simon said when they broke apart.

“Thanks for wanting to see me at all.” Wilhelm replied. “I really missed you.”

Simon hummed, a faint smile playing at his lips. He watched Wilhelm for a few moments before kicking off his shoes.

“Come here.” He said, shuffling over the bed towards the wall. Wilhelm followed suit and allowed himself to be guided down to a lying position, Simon’s chest against his back and arm around his waist. “You need to sleep.”

“It’s the middle of the day.” Wilhelm protested, weak as the protest may have been.

“People have naps all the time, and you know that you need it.” Simon said firmly, adjusting the pillow under his head with his free arm and finding Wilhelm's hand to hold in the other. “It doesn’t have to be for long, okay?”

“Okay.” Wilhelm nodded, feeling suddenly very relaxed. He took a deep breath settling into the comfort and warmth of Simon’s body around his as his eyes fell shut. “This is nice.” He mumbled after a while.

“Yeah.” Simon agreed softly. “Go to sleep, Wille.”

It wasn’t long until he felt Wilhelm’s breathing change, signifying that he had fallen asleep. He smiled, fondly but with an edge of sadness to it, and pressed a light kiss to Wilhelm’s shoulder before closing his own eyes. They would deal with the rest of the world when they woke up.