#taylor swift helps my mental health
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bluecardigan-13 · 11 months ago
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I’m probably writing to no one. But I’d like to pretend I’m writing to you.
Life is really hard right now. I’m super homesick after only 4 months of living in Oklahoma after moving here from HI. You’d think I would be alright since I moved here with my kids and husband by choice.
Mainly to first get my life back in order due to a chaotic life and living with 2 narcissistic parents. And the sudden loss of my dad in 2021. But I’m not ok. And I don’t know what to do with all that.
We also moved cause the cost of living in Hawaii is crazy expensive compared to OK. And so living on permanent disability makes things difficult especially after having a successful career in insurance for over 15 yrs. And also being a successful business woman with zero college degrees, brings my self esteem to nothing.
My anxiety and self confidence has always been all over the place. I have always been this control freak over everything in my life. Like I should be this or that, and have these things accomplished by a certain age etc.
But that all got taken away from me when I got sick in 2017. I got fired from my job that while it was stressful, I was good at it. I was an insurance underwriter for Lloyds of London insuring all kinds of “weird” things. But again - I was good at it!
I brought in $50M in revenue alone. And helped that department meet their gross premium goal for the first time since they started the department.
And before that I worked for Fireman’s Fund as a senior business analyst. And knew everything about everything for every single state of the union where insurance came! I worked in a call center where people would call in (who worked for the company) and would ask for me specifically cause they knew I knew what I was talking about.
Heck my boss would even turn to me to ask about business processes! I trained in our new hires. But the company wasn’t doing well and the parent company decided that it couldn’t take anymore losses due to bad decisions made by underwriting.
And so the parent company based out of Germany absorbed it. And even though I was the best they had, I got fired. Which sucked! I was angry. But I sucked it up and made sure the people who were going to be left behind would be well trained. The sad part is I was up for a management job. Well that job went to the most incompetent person on the team. LOL
Isn’t that life? But now I’m here sick with several mental illnesses and incurable medical illnesses. And making the best of it.
I make YouTube videos and hope I can help people like me. Hoping that when they see me they will see themselves and say hey there’s someone like me, and she’s doing ok. And maybe I can too.
Mental health and chronic illness/pain aren’t talked about enough. It needs to be don’t you think? It needs more of a platform, and that we need to also show people it’s ok to say I’m not ok.
Also I use art therapy to cope. I crochet and I also pour epoxy resin on my channel. I know it’s not that big of a deal but hey you have to start somewhere right?
I’m just wondering who’s listening tho? Really listening.
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bunnypov · 6 months ago
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🐰 welcome to bunnypov🐰
Heyyo 👋🏻 I’m Bunny, but you can call me S. too.
I am a 25 year old wife and mother from Texas!
My previous blog: INXHLE
My 11 year old account with 2.5k lovely mutuals, friends, and followers was recently deactivated.
I’d love to find some of the blogs I used to follow as well as find some amazing new content to reblog! ☺️
I will also be setting up a custom desktop theme soon, so please keep an eye open for it and some new links!
My content & reblogs:
- Aesthetic photography
- Nature / Cottage core
- Dark academia
- Nostalgia core / Y2K
- SWF age regression
- Quotes & Poetry
- Anime & Manga
- Music / Lyrics / Bands
- Memes & funny things
- Text posts & stories
- Sometimes personal posts or original content
- Basically just whatever’s I like 🩷
‼️ IMPORTANT ‼️
- This blog is SFW ONLY!
- Some art reblogged may be risqué in nature.
- DNI: anti-LGBTQ+ or conservative.
That’s all for now, love y’all!
-S. ♡
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p01son3d-ent1ty · 4 months ago
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Reblog if you can, everyone needs to hear this. This mentality applies to more than just romantic relationships, and it’s so important to recognise the points made in the video <3
(For anyone worried, this QR will take you to a video about recognising that you are loved and admired)
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sunshinegirl7 · 8 months ago
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Took so many sunsets and midnight cries,
To admit the truth
To confront my naked and raw self infront of the mirror
I saw those scars, painted like thunder bolts
And wounds that are as fresh as blooming roses.
And my voice? Lost in the dusty room filled with darkness.
But yes I found it somehow, in a tightly shut jar. I untied it and let it free.
I slowly smiled, my face drenched in tears and all the words of people written over my face in black, blinding my eyes.
I found her, in most ugly state but craving to come to sunshine.
I want to help her, take her out into light and show the good side of world.
Thats when i started to love myself
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leyyvi · 1 year ago
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bye i know i said this is a comfy chapter but theres a couple of not comfy moments and now im big sad writing them
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lunar-years · 2 years ago
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taylorsabrina · 1 year ago
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lover
the album that quite literally saved me. 💗
my favorite lyric: does the spoken outro from daylight count? the "i wanna be defined by the things that i love. not the things i hate. not the things i'm afraid of, i'm afraid of. or the things that haunt me in the middle of the night. i, i just think that... you are what you love."
my favorite song: all of the girls you loved before, ngl.
the song that makes me cry: soon you'll get better.
the song that's a fucking bop: cruel summer/paper rings.
the song i most dislike/least love: but i don't have one! i love them all!! ig the one i have listened to the least on the abum is afterglow.
send me an album
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writtenbyevie · 2 years ago
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evie, hello!! i hope you’re having a good day. 6, 7, & 20 for the new years asks? o:
kennedy my beloved 💛✨!! thank you for the asks, I hope you're doing swell as well 💫
6. what is one new things you discovered this year (could be a place/hobby/song etc)
Songwriting! I've always wanted to write music and finally decided to. This is also my first time writing autobiographically. I put elements of myself in everything I create, but it's always filtered through the lens of a character or hidden amongst other ideologies I don't actually share.
So it's both refreshing and terrifying to be this plainly vulnerable :)
7. top three albums you played this year
I shouldn't be surprised this but I am. My top 3 are:
Midnights (3AM Edition) by Taylor Swift
Punisher by Phoebe Bridgers
folklore (deluxe version) by Taylor Swift
Let it be known that 4 is evermore and 5 is Lover HAHAHAHA
20. if you could tell yourself something at the beginning of this year based on what you know right now, what would it be?
I know it says one but I wanted to give a few because I've learned a lot this year and I'm nothing if not the anti-thesis to brief.
Processing a situation is not the same as processing your feelings surrounding that situation. You cannot intellectualize your way through pain, nor can you logic your way out of love. So be angry and be in love. You already are anyway.
Take people at their word. Especially the kind ones. If they're lying, that's neither your fault, nor your responsibility. Sometimes people just love you. It's safe to believe them.
Your parents are wonderful people AND they have hurt you. These truths coexist. Acknowledging that doesn't make you ungrateful or selfish.
anywho, kennedy thank you very kindly for the asks!! sending you all the fuzzy and fizzy feelings found in love and champagne ✨💛✨!!
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landosjpg · 4 months ago
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the black dog | ln
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the one where you watch your ex boyfriend walk into some bar called the black dog.
lando norris x gender-neutral!reader
word count: ~1.9k
warnings: angst!!!!, happy ending so fluff as well, brief discussion of bad mental health, lando is a bit of a prick at some point, exes to lovers, one sexual innuendo (?)
note: based on this request and obviously the black dog by taylor swift. this is one of my favorite taylor songs EVER i got so excited when i got this request. i also love a good angsty, heart-breaking fic so giving this a happy ending was a bit harder than it should’ve but i hope you enjoy it!
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“stop that,” you softly cooed, your hands cupping his cheeks to try and make him look at you.
the past few weeks had been harsh on him, and you could feel how every self-deprecating comment just made him drown deeper into his own head. you just wanted the best for him.
he didn’t answer. instead, he looked away again, trying his best to avoid your gaze at all costs.
“it’s just been a bad weekend, baby. next one will be better,” you added.
“stop with the optimistic bullshit,” he rudely said before you could add anything else to try and cheer him up.
you knew he was angry —rightfully so —after missing on a potential win only a few days before, but you couldn’t just sit and watch him bring himself down anymore.
“it just hurts to see you like this,” you mumbled.
“it’s hurting you?” he snapped, his tone accusing. “why do you have to make everything about you, every single time?”
as his words escaped his lips, he gently pushed you off his lap, immediately getting up from the couch.
“i’m just saying…” you tried to explain, although his words hurt more than you would ever admit out loud.
“i don’t care what you’re saying,” he cut you off. “it’s always the same story with you. the world doesn’t fucking revolve around you, you know?”
your lips parted, intending to defend yourself, but no words left your mouth. not like lando would had let you speak, anyway.
“this is the last thing i need right now, i’m done here,” he grumbled.
you froze at the tone of his voice, not having heard him talking to you like that ever before. and you didn’t do anything to stop him when he picked up his jacket and walked to the entrance of your apartment, announcing his departure with a loud slam of the front door.
he just needed time, you told yourself.
but he didn’t call, and you didn’t wake up to a simple apology in your messages and him asking to see you as you were used to.
and it had been forty-two days since he had stormed out of your apartment and, unknowingly to you, vowed to never talk to you again.
and after six weeks of no contact, you still missed him.
lando had been more than just your boyfriend, he had been your best friend for as long as you could remember; he was there, in every little memory you had.
you had always been the first person he ran to whenever the smallest thing happened, and for the past few weeks you had to settle for watching his life go on without you through pictures and media outlets.
and as much as your friends tried to tell you that it would get better, every morning without him just got harder than the previous one; used to having his arms wrapped all around you and his curls tickling your neck, waking up in a cold bed was certainly something you weren’t quite fond of.
however, he seemed to be moving on.
that’s what you thought as you sat in the darkness of your room, the only light illuminating the space being the dim glow of your phone’s screen as you intently watched the small, blue dot moving on your screen.
he had forgotten to turn his location off.
like every weekend since the break up, you watched him walk into some random bar in a different city, piercing a new, deeper hole in your heart every time. and you couldn’t help but hope that they played your song each night, that even the smallest thing reminded him of you.
but instead, every morning you woke up to a new picture of him leaving the place with some girl wrapped around his arm, while you could barely wear your favorite clothes because they took you back to a memory you shared with him.
you didn’t understand how he didn’t miss you, how he could be doing so good without you by his side.
୨୧
it had never been his intention to walk out of your life that afternoon. but when the anger washed away, all he could feel was shame.
guilt, for how he had talked to you when all you wanted was to help. and he wasn’t sure he could ever look at you in the eyes without the feeling overfilling his senses. so, instead, he did what he knew best: he ran away.
and the only thing that could take you off his mind for some time was drowning his own pain in alcohol every weekend, end the night with some girl’s legs wrapped around him.
but that night, he froze as the first notes of your song started playing; the song that had started playing when you got in his car the first time he took you out on a proper date. and the upbeat music took him right back to that day.
he could still picture the sight of your teary eyes as you walked into his apartment after another failed date —the guy hadn’t even showed up; the sound of your sobs as you buried your face on his chest, looking for some comfort, still making his heart clench.
“you deserve better,” he had whispered into your hair, placing a soft kiss on top of your head. “someone who’s willing to give you everything.”
“i’m tired of searching,” you had simply mumbled, feeling hopeless after so many disappointments.
“maybe you don’t have to search for it,” he had said before he could even think about his words. “maybe it’s been right in front of your nose all this time.”
at the underlying confession of his words, you raised your head from his chest to look up at him.
“hm?” you hummed.
lando had always liked you; but he had also been scared of you not reciprocating his feelings, of your friendship being ruined by the love he had for you. however, he had been completely oblivious as to the way you had always looked at him.
but that time, he caught the glint in your eyes as his gaze met yours, and so he confidently asked:
“can i take you out on a date?”
he let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding as he saw you crack a smile, relief washing all over him.
“i would love to,” you mumbled.
he smiled at your reply, his thumbs coming up to wipe the remains of your tears.
“tonight, then?” he softly kissed your cheek before you nodded and wrapped your arms around his frame, unknowing of how the turn your relationship would take after that night.
he looked down at the girl who was grinding herself against him, trying to ignore the memories flooding his mind; but her eyes didn’t sparkle the way yours did as the song played. and he knew she just wouldn’t get the jokes he was so tempted to make, the ones that would send you into a fist of laughter despite of the many times you had heard them before.
in short, she simply wasn’t you. and he knew he wouldn’t ever feel that way with someone else.
“excuse me,” he said, trying to push her away from him.
he made his way out of the bar pushing in between the sea of people, his phone clutched in his hand the second he stepped a foot outside.
he sighed as he looked at his screen, the cool air making him come back to his senses; he couldn’t just text you. not after ghosting you for over a month.
but he missed you, so what else could he do? how else could he apologize for what he did?
୨୧
you turned around in bed as you felt the room being illuminated again by the screen of your phone, a message interrupting your attempt to sleep.
your heart skipped a beat as you saw his contact picture, followed by a simple “are you up?”. you couldn’t believe your eyes, anxiety coursing through your veins as you stared at the message.
“you still have read receipts on”
“say something, please”
fuck, of course. and you had been staring at his text for five minutes straight.
“what?” you simply typed with shaky fingers; it was dry, yes, but you were still hurt about how things ended between the two of you.
his answer came almost immediately: “just wanted to apologize” it read.
but nothing could’ve prepared you for his next message, asking if he could come over instead of doing so over text.
you hesitated for a few minutes; you knew you shouldn’t, but you needed closure as well.
so, naturally, you accepted.
you anxiously padded around your house as you waited for him, biting your nails as you imagined every possible scenario that could happen. five. ten. fifteen minutes, and then you heard a knock on the door.
the door opened slowly, revealing the figure of your ex-boyfriend.
you stepped aside and let him in, closing the door behind him and turning around with your gaze fixed on the floor. the silence was deafening,and the situation felt awkward.
“can i have some water?” lando tried to break the ice, his eyes fixed on you as you simply nodded and disappeared into the kitchen.
when you came back only a few minutes later with two glasses on your hands, he had made himself comfortable. you walked to the couch and sat next to him, with a considerable distance between the two of you.
“i just…” he broke the silence again, his voice low and slightly nervous. you didn’t dare look at him yet, so you looked down at your lap, where you fidgeted with your fingers.
you heard him sigh as he chose his next words carefully.
“i never meant to hurt you, or ruin what we had,” lando started. “it was a few bad weeks, and i know i shouldn’t have, but i took it all out on you. and then i didn’t think i could even look you in the face after what i said.”
you looked up at him, your eyes starting to water as you took in his words.
“you could’ve just explained yourself, i would’ve understood,” you replied with a thin, vulnerable voice.
“i was ashamed of myself after the fight and i thought running away from all of it would be the best,” he said as his gaze met yours. “truth is i haven’t stopped thinking about you for a single minute all this time. i really miss you,” he almost whispered.
“i…” you stuttered.
“i get it if you can’t forgive me,” his voice broke mid-sentence.
“‘s not that,” you mumbled, a few tears running down your cheeks. “just wish it didn’t take you this long.”
you noticed his pained expression as he noticed the tears on your face, quickly whispering a soft “c’mere” as he opened his arms. you sighed and scooped next to him, letting his arms wrap around your frame in a comforting hug.
“i’m really sorry,” you heard him whisper into your hair before he planted a gentle kiss on top of your head. “i won’t leave again.”
“promise?” you murmured, snuggling closer into his embrace.
“promise, baby,” he answered in the same low voice.
you nodded slightly, your eyes fluttering close as you took in his scent and the way his grip on you tightened, an oath to never let you go again.
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samkerrworshipper · 1 year ago
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My Masterlist
WIPS
Leah Williamson -
seeing her tonight, it's a bad idea right?
just some friends with benefits smut that’s ends with confessions of love
medication
r stops taking their anxiety medications during the euros finals to get rid of three side effects… but what happens when it seriously effects them on the pitch
let me love you
r struggles after her and leah break up after some drunken kisses with other people… can they mend it all before r’s health is seriously affected?
the call up
when r gets the news notification from the Spanish federation regarding the forced call up the espwnt
safe and sound
r having suicidal thoughts and leah just being there to support them and be there for them
playgirl
friends to lovers smut w cocky as fuck playgirl leah who secretly only has eyes on r
losing
what happens when r loses for the first time?
asthma attacks
what happens when r has a asthma attack whilst Leah’s out for the night?
i will wait for you.
r gets injured in the champions league final and finds herself pushing out everyone, is it to late to make up with the people that matter most?
lost cause
r doesn’t want to do life anymore… leah’s there to make it all better and let her know how loved she is
tourniquet
r struggles with self harm and Leah helps her with it in theee different examples
pain, sweet, pain.
leah’s return from her acl injury is nothing like what she wanted nor expected, but her team are there to help her up when she’s down.
scars and all
leah finds out about her girlfriends past mental health issues
beautiful girl series (leah + jordan as coparents)
part 1 -> close you’re eyes: leah and jordan’s daughter is struggling after their breakup
part 2 -> have no fear: jordan and r have a heart to heart and somethings are revealed
part 3 -> the monsters gone: leah confronts her daughter
part 4 -> she’s on the run: r runs away
part 5 -> and your moms are here: reconciliation
part 6 -> beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful girl: final part
Lucy Bronze -
mamacita
jersey smut with lucy after winning
daddy?…. sorry
just a little drabble about dom daddy lucy
a shoulder to cry on
lucy is there for r after she has a career shattering injury
euro champs and abs
lucy’s prize for winning the euros
leg shakes and body aches pt.2^
after care for the fic above
epiphany
random grief drabble - more r focused then lucy tbh but if u want a good cry then readdd
Alexia Putellas -
movie night
cheek voyeurism smut with r and alexia at team movie night
lap dance
stripper smut with Alexia after the world cup
on the sidelines
wag Alexia on the sidelines for wnba girlfriend
i remember everything
r struggles with eating disorder… alexis is to absorbed in her own life to notice.. what are th consequences?
the party
songfic based off the song the party & the after party by the weeknd… pure filthy smut
exile
songfic based off the song exile by taylor swift
the last time (pt.2^)
Alexia tries to apologise to r after what happened at the club… another songfic based off the song the last time by taylor swift
between thighs
just a little quickie fic
back between villages
alexia tears her acl.
sugar, baby
u have a little arrangement with la reina
bar-ca
babyfic with newborn alexia and r as parents
rockin’ around the christmas tree
fluffy kidfic with christmas with the putellas’ family
underneath the surface
alexia finds out about your endometriosis
Sam Kerr -
cock blocked
team night with the arsenal girls who r keeping you from being thoroughly fucked by your girlfriend
smut headcanons
just smutty dom headcanons with sammy k
a whore’s punishment
literal smutty porn without plot… that’s it.
concealed
little drabble about sam concealing a strap during a photo shoot
the phone call
based off the scene in the uswnt doc with the different call ups except sam x reader coded
acls
based off sam’s acl injury :(
Katie Mccabe -
nails
katie comes home from ireland camp with a new set of nails and she shows you just how much she can do even without using her hands or
Mapi Leon -
massage therapy
mapi gets injured… reader tries to resolve some of the tension in her body
warmed
cockwarming… that’s about it
las 15
based off of the spanish players boycott pre world cup
Alexia Putellas x Reader x Lucy Bronze -
twos a company, threes a crowd
| pt.1 | pt.2 | pt.3 | pt.4 |
pure filth between my three girlies
Leah Williamson x reader x Lia Wälti -
all yours
just a little friends to lovers angsty fic about lia and leah getting together when the three have always been best friends and r struggling with it
Mapi Leon x Reader x Ingrid Engen -
long distance
touch starved and anxious reader who’s been away from mapi and ingrid for a while and needs a reminder just how much the love her
Vivianne Miedema x Beth Mead -
bad days
Viv has a bad anxiety day… Beth’s there for her no matter what
Kristie Mewis x Sam Kerr -
pinky promise?
little anxiety fic about kristie stressing about meeting Sam’s parents for the first time
wet dream
kristie can’t sleep.. sam has a wet dream..
Lia Wälti x Alexia Putellas -
captains connection
sometiems the captains are the ones who need the most help after games..
auswnt -
togetherness
pt.1 | pt.2 | pt.3
just some tillies angst and fluff
arsenal women -
found family
r goes out in the snow and gets really sick, but is scared to bother their arsenal teammates, two captains show up at their door after them not showing up to training for a few days and help them out and show them just how much the team loves them
homework help
when r moves to england she struggles with the adjustment of new school… arsenal team are there for her though
sticker chart
r and kyra r the pranksters of the team… but what happens when they take it too far and the arsenal parents seperate them as a result
revival
arsenal reader has been struggling more than she’d ever admit.. when it becomes to much she attempts to take her life but her teammates refuse to let her kill herself when she has so much more to live for.
hard times
arsenal reader struggles with PTSD and new year’s eve is a particular struggle… but the arsenal girlies are there for her even if she doesn’t know she needs them
narcotics
reader has a drug problem.. her arsenal teammates help her to realise and overcome it
how did it end?
suicidal ex-arsenal reader who retired after leaving the club
barca women -
suffer in silence
r struggles with self harm after the problems with the spanish federation.. mapi, ingrid, lucy and alexia are there to pick up the broken pieces
exhausted
insomnia reader with concerned alexia
initiation orgy universe
initiation:
pt.1 -> pt.2 -> pt.3
celebrations:
pt.1 -> pt.2 -> pt.3
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bluecardigan-13 · 11 months ago
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50 likes!
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sunkissedscribbles · 4 months ago
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Do You Still Care?
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pairing: bf!mattheo x fem!gryffindor!chaser!reader
genre: angst
tw: mental health issues on y/n’s side (briefly) mentioned, mention of sex, swearing
word count: 5112
summary: mattheo’s plan to see if you still care backfires completely and ends with a breakup, but are you two able to resolve what's gone wrong?
Songs: the way i loved you - taylor swift (lyrics used), scared of my guitar - olivia rodrigo
a/n: thanks for the help @inksoakedparchment <3
masterlist
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dividers by @chachachannah
The promise ring landed on the cold stone flooring of the Slytherin common room with a metallic clink as you dropped the silver jewellery to catch Mattheo’s attention. You were both disappointed and frustrated with him because the last thing you thought you’d see when stepping into the Slytherin commons was a girl, clearly not you, sitting in your boyfriend’s lap.
Mattheo, clearly enjoying himself as he had his hands on the girl’s waist, turned his head to look at you. The shine left his eyes as they met yours, but his gaze soon dropped to the ring he bought you for your second anniversary, which was now on the floor. It stirred something in him, even the thought of it not being on your finger, where it belonged didn’t sit right in him. But he had to hide his pain. He knew he couldn’t break now.
Your facial muscles hardened as you crossed your arms in front of your chest, eyeing your boyfriend angrily, the girl in his lap oblivious to everything around her as all she cared about was that she got the privilege of touching Mattheo Riddle.
“I’m breaking up with you,” you exclaimed coldly, closing off the emotions and locking them up before they could overtake you. If he plays the indifferent, so are you.
This snapped Mattheo out of his trance as he realized he took it too far, and that his plan backfired. “What? No, Y/N, you can’t just say that-“
“Well, yeah, I can,” you spat and shook your head as you eyed the girl from a year below you in his lap and with a scoff, you added, “We’re over, Mattheo.”
“No, you’re overreacting,” he practically pushed the girl off his lap as he got up to be at eye level with you. Walking up to you, he took the promise ring from the floor and held it up for you between his thumb and index fingers. “We’re good together, princess. I love you, you love me. You can’t break up with me,” he shook his head as he tried to hold a desperate sound back, trying hard to maintain this cold facade he mastered throughout the years — the one he only let fall completely when he was around you.
You pushed his hand with the ring away as you spoke up angrily, “But I’m not going to be a second choice every time you see a pretty girl!” and without warning, you turned around and walked out of the common room.
He was still shocked as he stared at your ring between his fingers. This was a stupid game, he shouldn’t have done this. You were his first real girlfriend. The first serious relationship and the last he wanted to ever end. Why did he flirt with a girl in the first place even? It was because you two had been arguing a lot lately, which only resulted in your relationship becoming more of a competition of who can shut down more and keep the indifferent, cold act up. You needed time because it had always been hard for you to express your feelings the moment they appeared — you needed to digest them and let them digest you before you could finally get them off your chest in one way or another. But the more you kept it for yourself the more he thought you were falling out of love with him and didn’t care about him anymore. That’s why he came up with this idea; to make you jealous to see if you did still care. He was only now thinking about how he should’ve given you the time you needed to open up.
You hadn't even talked to him for weeks, trying to push the pain of the breakup down by focusing on other things: your studies, friends, yourself and you were working on erasing Mattheo from your life. And how could you make yourself forget about that twat? By replacing him.
Not the most logical thing to do, for sure and it only complicated things even more, but you got together with Michael Corner from Ravenclaw. It wasn't quite a mature thing to do, especially when Michael did actually have feelings for you and you knew how you'd regret this later because it could only end in pain on one of your side. Because if he found out you — let's be real — used him, he'd get heartbroken and angry. But if he didn't find out, you'd be unhappy with him which he probably wouldn't even notice. So, this is how you got yourself trapped in this vicious circle.
Mattheo, on the other hand, had been acting like a complete douchebag since you'd broken up with him. Not that he had been that nice before. But now the number of the fights he got himself into had severely increased, he started acting colder than anytime else before, and he started looking through you like you weren't even there. He also lost interest in his studies almost completely, his marks dropping lower and lower each day. Or, well, his enquiry had decreased to practising the jinxes and hexes he'd learnt on other students, and getting rid of his excess energy and frustration on the Quidditch pitch. Each and every time he saw you, it just annoyed him so much. He didn't like you with this new other guy, he hated how you seemed to enjoy your life without him so easily. He despised Michael, hated the way he talked with that stupid Welsh accent, and how he always seemed to have his goddamn hand on your waist, right where he had his when you two were together. No one other than him had the right to touch you, in his opinion, and he couldn't stand the mental image of you with someone else. He missed seeing the way your face lit up every time you got excited about something, he missed how your pretty eyes were sparkling and shining when you looked at him. He missed you, and how it had been before things started going spiralling down with all those many and frequent arguments lately. He was miserable and as much as it is selfish, he wanted you to feel just as bad.
But leading the word back to you, erasing him from your life had been harder than you make it seem to be. But knowing his grades were dropping and seeing him acting like a total arse to everyone all you could think of is how this all is your fault, how you were the source of causes behind him changing this seriously.
By the time the day of the Gryffindor-Slytherin match came, students were betting on either team or even making it complicated as "Potter will catch the Snitch but Slytherin will win." Of course, they were; every year this is the biggest match between all houses since the rivalry is the worst between these two houses. It's even worse than a World Cup — it's like boys comparing their sizes. It's no different this year either. The Beaters aren't playing as 'nicely' as they do against Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff — they don't only hit the Bludgers with their bats but the Beaters, and occasionally, the Chasers of the opposing team, too, and the Chasers go on the speed they normally would.
You were manoeuvring with the Quaffle in your hand across the field while Mattheo tried to take you down by crossing your way. Yes, he wanted to win and wanted you to lose for once but despite being as angry and frustrated with you, he couldn't bring himself to tackle you down with a Bludger. How could he? Yes, you broke up with him but that doesn't mean anyone can hurt you. You are his princess, Merlin forbid anyone touching you.
"Twat," you muttered to yourself as Mattheo passes you by, but then set off with greater speed to score another against Slytherin, making it 140-100 for Gryffindor. Soon, Slytherin scored too, as Theo got the Quaffle in his hands, but as you set off to get the ball back, a Bludger coming from Goyle hit your broom. This caused you to lose your balance and your grip on the broom handle.
Mattheo watched in horror as you were hanging from your broom, in the air, among the flying balls and students. His mind immediately went blank as he witnessed the scene before his eyes and he forgot all about the game. Without thinking about it any further, he set off in your direction instantly and wrapped an arm around your waist to save you from falling, and before you’d known, you were sitting behind him on the broom.
“What are you doing?” you asked as you wrapped your arms around his torso.
“Making sure you don’t fall, you idiot,” he exclaimed, trying to ignore the rapid pounding of his heart in his chest as you held onto him tight. Merlin, he missed your body close to his so much.
“Thanks,” you muttered reluctantly, trying to push down ann the feelings that lingered in you for him still.
“Don’t mention it,” he shook his head with a cold tone as he took you to the ground to get your broom back from where it’d fallen. He didn’t want to let go of you, he wanted you to stay pressed up against him, just to feel your arms around him, your warm breath tickling the soft skin of his neck. But he knew he had to let go. You have moved on, you don’t even talk.
Muttering another ‘Thanks’ when you got off from behind him, you went to grab the broomstick. He hopped off his broom too, watching as your delicate figure walked away from him frustratedly, trying to keep up the image that this hadn’t affected him at all, which took him back to how much he hated your new boyfriend. He was supposed to be your boyfriend, you two should’ve lived happily ever after like you two had dreamed.
And now, after the brief moment together, he hated the Ravenclaw boy even more.
“Don’t forget the game is still going on. Or are you worried about your little boyfriend seeing us together?” the mocking words rolled off his tongue without him even thinking about what he was saying.
Your blood boiled at his comment, but when your eyes flickered to the Ravenclaw stands, seeing Michael in all Gryffindor colours, you somehow didn’t feel guilty for the Ravenclaw boy witnessing this scene with you and your ex-boyfriend. “Jealous?” You spat at Mattheo and rolled your eyes, gripping your broomstick.
He let out a sarcastic scoff and following suit, he rolled his eyes. “Jealous? Of the nerd?”
Of course he was jealous, but he couldn’t possibly admit it. This was a game of who is the most stubborn to admit their true feelings. And he wasn’t going to lose. But it took everything in him not to just push you back to the ground, climb on top of you and fuck kiss you until you forget your goddamn boyfriend’s name.
“Yeah. Jealous ‘cause I’m with him?” You stepped back. Michael is a nice guy, you had to give him that. But he’s not Mattheo. Michael wasn’t by far the one you wanted, not who you loved. He didn’t have those mesmerizing chocolate eyes that stared into your soul and shined when he was looking at you, he didn’t have the dark curls you instinctively raked your fingers through after a long day when he was lying on top of you, using your breasts as a pillow and listening to your heartbeat like it was a music you composed only for him.
His eyes remained on you, and that little statement made him snap on an instant. He threw his broom onto the ground to be able to step closer and pull you in by the waist and flush your body against his. By this time, he had completely forgotten about the match going on — not that you had thought about that at this moment either. It was just the two of you again, even if just for a moment, even if it was only arguing with your ex-boyfriend. “Damn right, I’m jealous. He gets to touch you. He gets to kiss you. I hate it.”
“He can see this. Us. Everyone can,” you instinctively gripped onto his upper arms as your bodies stayed pressed against each other while glaring into his eyes. You couldn’t deny that you missed this closeness with him. Because your heart still only desired him and had no space for anyone else in it.
Mattheo glanced around, seeing the people and players looking at the two of you. But he didn’t actually give a damn about that right then. He was completely focused on you, his eyes burning with jealousy and a hint of desire. His hands remained on your waist as he wanted nothing more than to just kiss you without a care in the world about the public. “Do I look like I care?”
“No. We both know that’s not something you normally do,” you freed yourself from his grip as you made the snarky comment about the girl in his lap before grabbing your broom again and setting off to continue the match. How dare he come at you with how jealous he is after what he’d done? Bloody git.
The team was cheering after Harry had caught the Snitch, right when Katie scored through a hoop one last time, making the final score 340-250 for Gryffindor. When Crabbe’s Bludger hit you and you fell off your broom, leading to the ominous conversation with Mattheo, the Gryffindor team lost you, a damn good Chaser for enough time for Slytherin to win over the points, so when Crabbe scolded Mattheo for technically saving you, no one was surprised.
The stout boy yelled after Mattheo, who was currently leaving the pitch, enraged. “What the fuck was that?” Crabbe echoed, following the curly-haired boy. “It’s our job to get those bloody Gryffindors off their brooms and I had Y/L/N! She’s the best Chaser on that fucking team! Without her, we would’ve won! But you had to go and save her like the damn Prince Charming you are?!”
Mattheo clenched his jaw as Crabbe shouted at him, his arms crossed against his chest. He knew that Crabbe was right. It wasn’t his smartest move to save your ass, but deep down he also knew that no one should harm you. He was not losing you.
“So what? You want me to let you take her down or something? And yes, I’m the one to save her because she’s the only goddamn person worth saving in this whole world.”
You overheard his words and your whole body froze. Suddenly, all other noises, your team’s and the other students’ happy cheers were tuned out, you could only hear Mattheo’s words repeating in your head. Your heart was already pumping ten times faster, and stronger as well, you could hear the drum, the fast da-dum in your ears. The only person worth saving? You?
“Fuck, mate! What happened to the dickhead you’ve been since you two broke up?” Crabbe continued spitting in Matt’s face. “I started to think you got some sense when she dumped you! She’s just a dumb Gryffindor who likes being the centre of attention, dude, grow up! She’s not like us, not worth your time! Just some basic ass bitch — but she’s fuckable, I give you that”
Mattheo could feel his anger and rage building within him, but he tried to keep his cool, knowing that if he snapped, there would be no stopping him. He glanced in your direction, seeing you standing in the distance, watching him and Crabbe. He clenched his jaw as Crabbe called you a 'dumb Gryffindor', as he said you’re not worth his time. But the last comment, about you only being some nice piece of meat, made him snap. He suddenly sprang closer to Crabbe and pushing him against the wall of the changing rooms, Mattheo pinned him the boy twice his size there, relentlessly gripping his Quidditch robes.
“Shut your goddamn mouth, you piece of shit,” he spat at Crabbe. “You don't even know her. You don't have the right to talk about her, you don't have the right to say her name! And if you dare talk about her like that again, I will tear you limb from limb!” he growled at the other boy in a low voice, his eyes darkened by anger and rage.
“Aw, Riddle, you gone soft for her. Is shagging her this nice?” Crabbe, being taller and bigger in a sense that’s not muscle mass laughed at Mattheo with a grin, not realizing the next thing Mattheo would do for sure was breaking his nose.
But before he could have done any damage to the boy, you pulled Mattheo away, knowing there would be nothing that could stop him from potentially sending Crabbe into a coma and himself in detention. For you. Because of you. Again.
When your hands grabbed onto his biceps to pull him back, his fingers instinctively softened on the fabric of Crabbe’s robes, knowing your touch like the back of his palm. He felt a sense of satisfaction wash over him as you held onto him and pulled him back, the urge to spin around and kiss you growing stronger than any, but he was still too pissed over Crabbe’s words.
“He’s not worth it. Just some douchebag,” you muttered to Mattheo when he started to try to escape your arms, Theo helping you by using a muting charm on Crabbe in order to keep him from saying anything else that would anger Mattheo even further. Partly angrily, you shoved him under a rain of cold water in the changing rooms to have him come to his senses, still in your Quidditch robes.
The cold shower snapped him out of the haze of anger Crabbe’s words put him into, his breathing returning back from feral to normal as he faced you in the shower, his hair soaking wet and his robes already dripping too — your clothes were somewhat damp as well by that time. “I’m not sure if I would’ve been able to stop myself back there,” he shook his head slightly.
“I know,” you just nodded, while in an internal fight between love and hate where you had no idea which one to let win.
Mattheo, knowing you more than anyone else, instantly knew what you were thinking, now that he was finally focusing on you and not on keeping the cold facade up in front of you. He could feel his dark curls stick to his forehead as they were soaking wet, still standing under the cold water. He looks at you for a moment before speaking up. “Just scream at me. Shout whatever you want.”
You wanted to scream, and shout, just like he had told you to. But you knew you had to stay away from him emotionally because it would only lead to you breaking down in front of him, which would probably end in a position with him that would be considered cheating on Michael. Your boyfriend. Mattheo wasn’t your boyfriend anymore, for fuck’s sake!
You shook your head. “No,” you scoffed and turned the water off before taking a step back. “Thanks for defending me. And saving my ass. But we’re over,” you said, your demeanour cold and distant as you turned around and walked away.
Mattheo's eyes widened in shock as he heard you say you were over, again. The panic and pain that washed over him got the best of him and quickly grabbed your arm again and turned you around, forcing you to face him again. He didn't want to lose you completely, not like this, not because of his own stupidity. "You don't mean that," he shook his head as he spoke up in desperation.
"Yes, I do," you scoffed angrily. No, in fact, you did not mean it at all. "You were openly flirting with that Slytherin, she was looking at you like she had given you head earlier! Oh, or had she? Why did you go and have to do that?"
Mattheo's expression turned from desperate to frustrated in no time as he clenched his jaw. He took a step closer to you, his voice growing more agitated. "Damn, Y/N, I was just messing around, I-"
"Messing around?" you cut in with an irritated scoff, covering the pain of betrayal. "When you had a girlfriend? Are you insane?" you pushed him back to make him stumble a bit and let go of your arm, on the verge of crying out of frustration and hurt.
At your refusal to trust him, his frustration and annoyance only grew, showing in a sigh and a scowl as you pushed him away. "I've never done anything with her! I would never do anything with her, Y/N. I don't want anyone else but you, don't you get that?"
"I don't care! I don't want someone who's doing things behind my back! Next time you get someone pregnant and tell me you were only messing around?!" you shook your head as the first set of tears started running down your cheek.
Mattheo felt his anger being replaced by a sense of shock and pain as he got accused of ever being able to cheat on you. "Damn it, Y/N, I'd never do anything with anyone else! I just... I just wanted to get a reaction out of you."
"Why?" you ran a frustrated hand through your hair while shaking your head. You started to lose it, not understanding the situation by now.
"Because I'm a moron, okay?" he scoffed bitterly. "Because I knew you'd get jealous if you saw me like that. We were falling out and I wanted to see if you still cared!" he spilt, to which a gobsmacked and frustrated expression got painted on your face. He thought you stopped caring about him?
I mean, sure, you two had started falling out and you two did argue a lot in the past month or two, but it wasn't at all because you didn't care about him anymore. You just couldn't quite word what was happening inside you. And right when you were finally ready and stepped into the common room to fill him in and come clean, he was sitting there, on the couch with another girl in his lap.
Suddenly the few little tears turned into rivers as fat drops rushed down both your cheeks, out of all the anger, frustration, sadness and disappointment that have built up in the past few weeks. You backed off, towards the door but as he saw you do that with the heavy rain of tears that were streaming down your face, his eyes welled up as well and he warily took a step closer to you to pull you into a tight embrace while muttering "No, no, no, don't cry." You gave in to the similarity of his touch and leaned into it for a second before coming to your senses and pulling away, knowing Michael was waiting for you outside.
Mattheo watched you suddenly abort the physical contact between the two of you, his expression quickly changing to confusion and disappointment as you stepped back. He didn't have to see the boy to know the reason behind your motions. "No, wait," he reached out and grabbed your wrist to turn you around with a desperate voice and a pleading tone. "Don't go. Please, don't go with him."
"I have to," you replied as you were forced to look into his eyes but you couldn't mask the pain anymore. "He's my boyfriend."
Those words felt like a punch to the gut for Mattheo, shattering the remains of his heart into a million little pieces. Hearing you call Michael Corner your boyfriend caused a wave of pain and anger to course through his veins. He clenched his jaw, his grip on your wrist only growing firmer the more desperate he became. "You don't have to, that's the point. You're with me, not him. You're mine, not his."
Your blood boiling, you freed your wrist from his tight grip exasperatedly. "You don't fucking own me, Mattheo Thomas Riddle"
"Damn it, I know I don't! I never said that. But we belong together, Y/N/N. You know you don't love him. Not like you love me."
He dares to call you by your nickname?
"Unfortunately," you spit, "that's not your fucking business anymore."
This is how we get to the present day. You broke things off with Michael yesterday after guilt got too much for you to handle, after realizing you can't possibly keep stringing him along like some dog, you can't use him to drown the feelings you have for Mattheo. And this is why you are currently in the music room on the fifth floor. It has always been like some sort of shelter for you. It's never judged, had a piano you played with preference and you could just sit down and live up to your artistic skills. You wrote your poems and songs here.
Mattheo knows. Not about the break-up but how much time you spend in this classroom. He sometimes accompanied you as well, while you two were together. So, when he doesn't find you in your room after hearing you ended things with Michael, this is where he looks for you.
You're sitting by the piano, playing the instrument in question, singing something you wrote a few days prior. And Mattheo's only watching, standing by the door, listening to your beautiful, usually soothing but now oh-so-troubled voice, paying attention to how your delicate fingers dance over the keys.
"...He can't see the smile I'm faking And my heart's not breaking 'Cause I'm not feeling anything at all And you were wild and crazy Just so frustrating, intoxicating, complicated Got away by some mistake and now
I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain It's 2 a.m. and I'm cursing your name I'm so in love that I acted insane And that's the way I loved you Breaking down and coming undone It's a roller coaster kind of rush And I never knew I could feel that much And that's the way I loved you..."
It's a gasp that snaps you out of the song and your focus is instantly shifted the moment you turn to look at the person the sound came from, and you find yourself facing Mattheo. He's feeling guilty, but then again, the knowledge that you miss him makes him feel proud and a strange sense of happiness flows through him. It fills him with the hope that maybe, just maybe there is a chance to make this thing work between the two of you.
"Are you following me?" you ask, scoffing as you shut your feelings out again when looking at him.
"Maybe I am," he admits with a shrug, trying to feign nonchalance. He glances at the piano before shifting his attention back to you, and saying, "heard you playing."
"No shit, Sherlock," you bark bark back at him.
"This was about me, wasn't it?" he steps to the piano and looks down at you after closing the door.
"About comparing you and Michael," you correct him.
"And what's the point in that?"
"To remind myself how I love an obnoxious prick instead of someone who's kind and caring," you roll your eyes.
Mattheo scowls at your insult and crosses his arms defensively. "I'm not obnoxious. I'm not going to pretend to be someone else to fit your definition of 'kind' and 'caring.'"
"I miss my Mattheo," you exclaim coldly. "" Who was like that, with me. Who didn't try to make me jealous because he was fucked in the head and thought I didn't care!"
He sighs in frustration, running his hand through his hair. "I still am that Mattheo. I never stopped being him. I was just trying to get a reaction out of you, to see if you cared at all. Nothing with that girl was serious."
You scoff. "And now you expect me to just forgive and forget for choosing not to talk about the very obvious problem but to go the easier way?"
Exasperated by the conversation, he shakes his head. "No. No, I don't expect you to do that so easily. I know what I did was wrong, okay? I know I messed up. But I was angry and frustrated because we were fighting almost every day for weeks and you weren't making it any easier by not telling me about how you were feeling. I-I was worried about you and then I was worried for us, for the future we've planned. I acted unreasonably and the next thing I know is you taking your ring off and me losing you because of my own stupidity."
Taken aback, you shake your head with thoughts of all kinds going through your head. He still loves you, how could you deny him? "I told you I had something going on that I wasn't able to talk about yet," you shake your head.
"I know. I know and I'm sorry. I should've given you the time and I should've been patient. But I feared I was losing you," he lets out a guilty, ragged breath. "I'm not begging you, but I'm not giving up on you, on us either. I'm sorry, I miss you," he says, tapping his fingertips on top of the piano as he looks down at you.
Letting out a relieved sigh at hearing the genuineness of his tone and words, you get up from the instrument and step toward him, taking his hand in yours, thus making both of your hearts skip a beat before they start to beat more rapidly. The truth is, you don't think he could ever do anything that'd make you stop loving him.
"I'm sorry and I miss you too," you reply softly, making him smile while the shine returns to his chocolate eyes as he looks at you. He reaches into his pocket, then holds the promise ring you've taken off out for you. He's been having it in his pocket since that day, and on his nightstand at night. "May I?"
With a small yet genuine smile, you nod and hold your hand out for him, and after returning it to where it belongs, he kisses your hand gently. "I'll never let you go again."
"You better."
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taglist: @inksoakedparchment @mqstermindswift @reys-letters
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mickyschumacher · 1 year ago
Text
𝐃𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐒 .ೃ࿐
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𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘: being in a secret relationship with lando norris has been a journey in itself. but nothing comes harder than the moments where you both struggle to keep your hands off one another.
𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒: 18+ (minors DNI), unprotected sex (wrap it before your tap it lol), cumming inside, voyeurism, fingering, slight handjob, boyfriend established but secret, cute cringe couple humour, obvious pining, poor knowledge of pr specialist things, mentions of mental health and stress, mclaren in itself needs a warning, mention of fave menace w*ll b*xton (simply ew), allusion of future marriage
𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: lando norris x mclaren’s pr specialist!fem!reader
𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐓: 4k+
𝐀/𝐍: this is based of taylor swift’s ‘dress’! okay, so i’m giving you lovelies this one and some others while i study for my last exam 😔 i actually have some requests which are exciting and nerve wrecking but i'm gonna try my level best to do them after my exam. although i’m also supposed be on a plane not too soon after. anyways, thank you so much for your support and patience ♡︎
𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓
⋆  •°.  。  .°•  ⋆
As a PR specialist, things were constantly changing. For example, for a certain amount of time you were assigned to Fernando Alonso when he was under McLaren. Quite honestly, it was a nightmare.
There was nothing wrong with Fernando. For the time you had spent with him, he was rather sweet. But the media had painted him out as some sort of tyrant of McLaren, claiming that the F1 team belonged to him as opposed to being owned by Zak Brown. Then again, you supposed the Spaniard’s lack of care for listening didn’t help either.
When learning that Fernando was leaving, you could only hope that whoever you were assigned to next was less work than him.
In came Lando Norris, a young driver with ambition and humour, and lucky for you, little work.
Somehow he just knew the right things to say. And if he didn’t, he was always asking you beforehand.
Between the both of you there was only a two year age gap so of course it was easy to befriend each other. You were always talking about something to the other.
His passion for DJing, his childhood or your love for travelling and the gossip of certain celebrities. How you were absolutely certain JLo and Ben Affleck was a PR couple because who on earth had a nude portrait of themselves above their bed?
It wasn’t until almost a year ago where you realised you liked him more than just a friend. There was just something about the way you two communicated that left in trailed sighs, awkward laughs desperate to talk more and grins that got your hearts pacing.
Or perhaps it was the way you had poured your hearts out to one another. As happy as Lando looked, he was one under a lot of pressure which affected is mental health. You were there for all of this ups and downs. You were his number on speed dial for everything.
And when things got a little too much for you, Lando did his best to not only be there for you but to cheer you up. Stupid jokes, random flowers and, teddy bears.
How were you not supposed to like him?
Surprisingly, Lando had been the one to confess his feelings to you. Well, only after one of the engineers from Mercedes was openly trying to court you at an F1 dinner.
Lando had gotten so jealous that he had pulled you aside that evening and begged you to not think of anyone else but him. That you were only supposed to smile like that at him… with him.
At first, you were thrilled and kind of shocked that Lando felt the same way. But that happiness and smile he liked so much quickly faded when you thought about your job.
‘F1’s Lando Norris is dating his PR specialist’…
Yeah… the implications of that sounded terrible. You could imagine it already. What was Lando hiding to date his publicist? Is Lando that good of a person?
And while you and all the people knew the truth, those types of rumours would’ve undermined your job in the first place and honestly, you were sure that McLaren wouldn’t exactly be jumping with excitement that you two were dating.
So you mentioned this to Lando with the suggestion of being secret about your relationship for now.
You could literally see some of the shine in his eyes fade. He was gutted but he understood what you meant. He’d rather be with you secretly than not at all and without his best friend.
our secret moments in a crowded room
they've got no idea about me and you
there is an indentation in the shape of you
made your mark on me, a golden tattoo
Your relationship with him had been a roller coaster. Neither of you had been in a secret relationship and neither of you could deny how fun it was.
Take right now for example. Today was the McLaren’s car launch for the 2023 F1 season. The room was filled to the brim with all sorts of people: journalists, publicists, engineers, marketers, social media managers, the new driver next to Lando, Oscar.
Yet with all those people, Lando and you found it impossible to not find each other. You were constantly meeting each others eyes, especially when you were nearby for his interviews.
There was a thrill, you must admit, about no one knowing about the two of you.
A rush of adrenaline at the thought that no one knew nor expected you to be in Lando’s bedroom this very morning before the launch.
“Remember to be sort of vague about the car and, well, everything. I mean obviously but I don’t think Will’s going down without a fight,” you reminded your boyfriend with an annoyed sigh.
Will Buxton was not only a F1 journalist but a man who got under everyone’s skin. You couldn’t fathom why people liked him in the first place.
Lando, who was leaning on his elbow on his bed, gave a hum of response. He only had half of his mind present as he watched you get ready. “Surely, this can’t be fair,’ He asked.
You raised a brow at him through the mirror. “What?” You queried before putting on a necklace. Sorry, attempting to. You weren’t exactly sure why the clasps of necklaces were made so poorly.
Lando got up from the bed and walked up behind you. He grabbed the necklace from your hands with an amused expression before bringing it to your neck. With one hand, he pushed your hair to the side and joined the clasp to the metal ring. He rested his fingers on the back of your neck, slowly rubbing the area as he met your gaze in the mirror.
“I mean, you get to wear this,” Lando started. His hands ran over the satin silk material of your black dress. It was fairly casual, landing mid-thigh. Perfect enough for you to blend into the crowd. Although, it didn’t matter for Lando. He could always pick you from the crowd. Especially, if you were wearing this. “And I wear this? It doesn’t seem fair,” he whispered into your ear.
You let out a small laugh, eyeing his new uniform for the season. You turned to face him, rubbing your hands over his chest and pretending to dust it. “I think you look quite good, love.”
Lando narrowed his eyes. You felt his hand travel up your neck and to your lips. “When did you even buy this? It wasn’t even in your closet?”
Your heart started to pace when you caught that knowing glint in his eyes. His mended brows seemed to ease when you didn’t respond. Sometimes you didn’t need to open your mouth to say anything. Instead, you let your eyes talk.
A small grin came to his face. He turned you to face the mirror. His hands came alive, roaming your thigh and waist. “Just for me, huh?” Lando smiled.
“Lando,” you warned weakly. You had a feeling where this was going. Honestly, you weren’t opposed to it. But the both of you needed to clock in soon. “It’s supposed to come off after the launch.”
Lando pursed his lips, pressing a kiss to the side of your neck and meeting your gaze. “Oh, it supposed to come off too? Jesus, I don’t think I can’t wait that long.”
Lando could feel the perfume he has come to love so much infiltrate his nose. God, this dress and now the perfume. How on earth was he going to get out of here?
“Fuck,” He murmured out. He closed his eyes and rested his chin on your shoulder. He needed to get himself together. But the thing about your skin was that it was so inviting… so warm.
You felt his his arms wrap around your waist as you added some finishing touches to your look. Lando pouted at you through the mirror.
“What’s wrong, baby?” You cooed, squishing his cheeks with your free hand.
“I don’t think I can leave this room. I can’t,” Lando groaned, starting a line of kisses on your neck.
“Lando…” You whimpered out pathetically, feeling your neck stretch out even more willingly. You could feel him close in on the one area near your ear.
“Fuck, Lando. Not there,” You swore but with no effort to stop him.
Lando’s greed seem to increase upon your exclaim. He furthered his attack on the spot, sucking enough of your intoxicating skin, not only to get his full but leave a fresh purple mark.
Now he was satisfied enough to leave the room.
You watched his lips leave your skin, almost leaving you to pour for a second before that dark spot on your skin caught your eyes.
You gasped. “You didn’t,” you said in disbelief, whacking your boyfriend.
Lando’s blues twinkled at you as he planted a cheeky kiss to your cheek. “I did.”
Now you were in a room of all these people. It was exhilarating for Lando to know that he had given you a tattoo of some sorts. To attend those interviews and know that behind your carefully placed hair, he had given you something no one else would ever… yeah, he was aching to leave.
It wasn’t any less for you. Even last night you couldn’t keep your hands off each other. You were walking around with the fact that you knew what was underneath the damn racing gear. The scratches and indentations of your hands on his skin caused by the will to bring Lando even closer to you.
all of this silence and patience, pining and anticipation
my hands are shaking from holding back from you… ha, ah, ah
all of this silence and patience, pining and desperately waiting
my hands are shaking from all this… ah, ha, ha, ha
Lando was looking at you probably more than one should look at their PR specialist to the point he was sure you could feel his eyes on you.
But he couldn't help. Every little thing you did in that dress had caught his attention.
Your pinky-red painted lips covering the champagne glass you held. Those lips he wanted for himself. On him. Everywhere. Now.
The occasional brush of your hands that sent shudders he had to surpress.
The lights of the venue practically spotlighting you so everyone could see how beautiful you looked. So Lando could see exactly how nicely the dress clung to everyone of those damning curves.
The polite smiles you offered every single person you met. A gesture that sent his heart racing.
The forced polite laughter and chuckles you gave to the people that flirted with you. A gesture that made him both proud and frustrated. Proud in that you were clearly faking it because he knew what your real smile and laugh was. Hell, he had the pleasure of making it everyday. And that people clearly found you as beautiful as he did. Frustrated because people were clearly into you and he could do nothing but watch in silence.
Lando couldn't blame them either. If he was them, he too would've stopped to impress. But he didn't need to. Not when you were his entirely and he yours.
The more he looked at you the more his hands shook and his patience wore thin. His hands ached for this day to end, for him to take you to his room, and remove that goddamn dress.
He could imagine what his former teammates Carlos and Daniel say. Something along the lines of "stop staring at her like you want to eat her".
Which, in all honestly, wasn't true.
Lando didn't want to eat you. He wanted to devour you. Slowly and gently. He wanted to appreciate you... all of you. So much that only his name was falling from those beautiful lips of yours.
say my name and everything just stops
i don't want you like a best friend
only bought this dress so you could take it off
take it oh, ha, ha, ha-ah
carve your name into my bedpost
'cause i don't want you like a best friend
only bought this dress so you could take it off
take it oh, ha, ha, ha-ah
Lando couldn't imagine the poor luck he had. The event was finally over and he was home. Without you.
You had become slightly tied with some last minute discussions with the reporters and journalists, even your dear favourite Will.
Which meant for the past hour, Lando had nothing but his thoughts. Thoughts that consisted only of you, that dress, and what he was going to do with you.
What was he supposed to do?
Unbothered to put on a new change of clothes, Lando was in bed only in his boxers which had a very obvious bulge.
Lando let out a sigh, his hand brushing over his clothed cock. "Fuck," he muttered out through a clenched jaw. If it was any other day, he would've lost all self-control and jerked off to his thoughts of you. But you were going to be home soon and he desperately wanted to feel you.
"Lando? Honey, I'm home!" Your voice echoed through his house, teasing him.
Lando whipped his head up, feeling all his thoughts and emotions briefly stop as he darted towards the entrance.
You were taking of your heels when you saw Lando stand in all his glory almost naked. You couldn't help but laugh lightly. "Oh my... I thought we discussed you not walking around the house naked, Lando."
Lando said nothing. Instead, he took a step towards, eyes searching your face and arms encircling your body closer to him.
The hairs on your body stood straight while goosebumps started to sprawl across your skin. Lando's thumb brushed across your bottom lip. "You were later than expected," He said in a tone that almost neared a whine.
You let out a sigh, kissing the tip of his thumb. "I know. I'm sorry, baby."
Lando grinned. "It's okay," He quipped before scooping you up in his arms.
You let out a yelp before smiling as Lando ventured to your bedroom. You could soon feel the soft sheets of your bed touch your skin while Lando hovered over you.
"You have to tell me what the deal with this dress is, love," Lando whispered. His finger slid under the strap of your dress before trailing all the way down to your bare breast.
You opened your mouth to answer but not even a hint of a sound came out as Lando's finger circled your nipple gently. You met his eager blue eyes, waiting for answer.
"I only bought this dress so you can take it off. Simple as that."
Lando let out a low exhale, feeling his cock harden even further. God, were you even real?
"Yeah?" He hummed, pushing the straps of your dress down your arms. He pushed his face down lower, wrapping his lips around your nipple as he continued to pull your dress down your body.
Your back arched on the bed, pushing yourself into his mouth even further. Without a word, you lifted your hips up and Lando had fully taken the dress off.
His other hand reached your other nipple, paying it an equal amount of attention. He rolled the pebbled mound between his thumb and index finger, giving it a slight squeeze.
You let out a small whimper. Your hand navigating through his short curls. You could feel your core tighten and your pussy become slick with your arousal.
Lando unlatched his lips from your breasts, using both hands to gently thumb your nipples. "Tell me want you want, love. I want to hear it from these pretty lips."
God... you couldn't even decide. "I don't know. I want your lips. Your fingers. Fuck, I want it all."
Lando couldn't help but grin as a he felt a surge of energy rush through. "I can do it all," He chuckled before bringing his lips to yours. His tongue darted between your lips and into your mouth. His hands trailed up and down your waist while a muffled moan came out of his mouth.
You kissed him back with the same intensity of fervor, bringing your hands around his neck, willing him closer to you.
Lando could tell by the slight squirm of your legs, you were getting impatient down there. Slowly, he trailed down your waist and reached your panties. His own lips quirked at the damp material. Pressing his fingers into your core, he could feel a shudder overcome you.
Lando continued his assault on your lips as he rubbed you through your panties.
You removed your lips in a gasp for air. "Don't tease, Lando," You moaned out, clenching your thighs so it trapped his hand to your pussy.
Lando chuckled. He used his free hand to brush over your swollen lips. God, he wanted those lips around his cock. Maybe tomorrow morning. Or maybe in the shower tonight. Right now, he wanted to focus on you. "Say please. A good girl should always use her manners, no?"
This good girl thing had always infuriated you. It felt childish. But then it paled in comparison to the tingling and blossoming sensation of Lando's fingers rubbing your clit.
But of course, if you were going to be a good girl, you were always going for extra credit.
"Please, Lando. Fuck. I need your fingers. Please. I love the way they fill me up. The way they feel in me. Please."
Lando wanted to grin. But all he could do was groan in response. How could he not reward his dear overachiever?
His fingers pulled down your panties, snatching down the damp material past your legs. A guttural sound of pure sin fell from his mouth as he saw your pussy. It glistened in front of him, almost as if it was flooded. Sliding his fingers down those soaked folds, he watched you writhe under him and whimper.
Lando kept his eyes on you as he pushed two fingers into you slowly. He could feel your core envelope him and welcome him graciously. He watched your back arch once he began thrusting into a pace, feeling your walls clench around his fingers.
"Shit," you moaned, reaching for your breasts to both add even more pleasure and bring some sort of sanity. "Faster, baby. Please."
Lando sped up the pace of his fingers, bringing his thumb to rub your clit. His eyes flickered to your pussy. He licked his lips. You were swollen and engorged. Your puffy lips continuously took him in and it was almost paining his cock that he wasn't inside you yet.
A new intense wave of euphoria settled over you. Your body convulsed with a buzz that provided the almost silent moans from your mouth. "Fuck.... I... I'm gonna come," You moaned out, head falling back as your mind became clouded with pleasure.
Lando's cock throbbed from not being touched. He could do it no longer.
The whine you released when Lando took his fingers out of you almost made him want to put them back in. But instead, with a speed he had never even found in his car, he took off his boxers and hovered over your body.
"I know. I know," Lando murmured, pressing his lips into yours to silence your begging plea.
You placed your own fingers in your mouth, drenching them in your saliva. Removing them, your hand travelled down his waist, brushing past his v-line before circling your hand around his cock. You could feel Lando moan into the kiss, briefly stilling at your touch.
Slowly you rubbed him up and down, dangerously thumbing the slit of his cock. You watched as your saliva lubed him, giving him a unique shine. Your shine.
"Jesus fucking christ," Lando moaned out. He was sure if you kept up like this, he was going to cum in your hands rather than inside you.
"Fuck, as much I love your hands and touch. I need to be in you, baby," Lando sighed, removing your hand from his cock and slowly pressing into your body to slide his cock up and down your pussy.
You moaned at his words, feeling his lips wrap around your nipple once again.
"Stop teasing," You panted. The buzz created by the tip of his cock rubbing your clit was almost paining and torturous.
Lando didn't even mean to tease. But even just feeling your pussy felt like a different type of high. He groaned, pushing the tip of his cock into your swollen lips. A rush of warmth surged through him as he laid in you for a brief moment.
Your pussy was a safe haven. A cocoon made for his cock. This high... this pleasure... he could feel it with no one than you.
You sobbed in ecstasy. Lando was almost bring cruel. You raised your hips, fucking yourself onto your cock.
Lando had to keep himself above you, almost collapsing at your action. He let out a small laugh at your impatience before he started to move in you.
As he thrusted into you, you could feel his cock glide through your folds, reaching those familiar areas of arousal. You clenched your walls around him teasingly, silently urging him to speed.
"Fucking hell," Lando hissed out, speeding up the movement of your hips.
Sweat and arousal doused the both of you as the room was full of your pants and the obscene sound of your skin slapping.
"I'm gonna cum soon, baby," Lando said once you clenched around him once again. This clenching action always drove him overboard. It pulled him in even further into you and pressured his cock to pulse inside of you.
"It's okay. Cum with me," You moaned, bringing him into a sloppy kiss.
Your muffled moans became impossibly higher as Lando rutted into you at a merciless speed. The wave of pleasure and euphoria that had sprawled across the both of you was inexplicable. A transient unearthly state of mind. A paradox of what was holy and unholy.
Your hands had found their way to Lando's back. Your fingernails dug lightly into the smooth skin of his back. You dragged them down as your hips bucked higher in the chase of the climax.
"Fuck! Lando!" You cursed.
Lando could feel his cock twitch and throb inside you. The nails. His name. Your lips. It was any second now. "Fuck. Say my name, Y/N!"
'When your eyes had started to roll, you blinked focusing on the most beautiful boy in front of you. God he was a sight to behold. Blue eyes hooded with lust, lips swollen and puffy... albeit sweaty, but handsome nonetheless. 'When your eyes had started to roll, you blinked focusing on the most beautiful boy in front of you. God he was a sight to behold. Blue eyes hooded with lust, lips swollen and puffy... albeit sweaty, but handsome nonetheless.
"Lando!" You moaned, "I love you so much, Lando! Fuck!"
Your loud groans disturbed the quiet peace of the air as Lando and you felt the wave of euphoria hit you hard, his hips stilled within you. His body shook, warming your walls and folds with an influx of white.
Lando let out a soft moan, chin falling into your shoulder while both your sweaty bodies pressed together. You could still feel Lando's cock within you, giving every last dribble of cum to you.
"I love you, I love you, I love you.," Lando's hoarse voiced mantra made it's way into your ear. He planted a lazy kiss onto your shoulder before turning his body to face the ceiling. "Fuck, I love you so much, Y/N."
You turned on the side of your body, leaning on your hand. Your eyes were weighed with exhaustion but nevertheless you smiled at him. "I guess I should buy more dresses often," You joked.
You could feel Lando's body rumble with a gentle chuckle. His hand reached to move your sweat-ridden hair behind your ears. His blue eyes trailed over your face, in awe of how he had gotten this lucky in his life. The woman he loved so much was right next to him and he hoped forever.
Lando smiled at you, bringing your fingers to kiss them. He briefly thought backed to the small box he had managed to hide away in his closet. Three podiums. He was going to get three podiums and make sure that ring adorned your finger.
"Love, I'll buy all the dresses you want. And I'll take them off for you too."
© 𝐌𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐘𝐒𝐂𝐇𝐔𝐌𝐀𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐑
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eddiediaaz · 2 months ago
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hi guys, i am kind of ashamed and embarrassed to have to do this, but i figured it can't hurt to ask. basically i am really struggling right now (i know a lot of us are). i need financial help, so i set up a ko-fi page ☕
any kind of help would be so appreciated and i am so grateful for anyone taking the time to read this little post.
long story short: because of situations completely out of my control, i lost my job in vfx after almost 8 years and i am now forced to switch careers. i'm going back to school and can't find a part time job even tho i have been working non stop for 15 years. financial aid will only cover my rent, so i absolutely need to work 20 to 30 hours a week to cover the rest of my living expenses, but it's really hard to find a job. i am also currently over 10k cad in debt from my film school loans and credit cards.
signal boost would be appreciated, if you can 💕
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my situation in more details under the cut for those who are curious
i was working in the vfx industry as a 2D compositor since 2016 (i have worked on over 40 films and tv shows), but in december of 2023 i lost my job due to the hollywood strikes (as expected, and as it should—i fully support the strikes). this was supposed to be temporary for a couple months where i could get unemployment benefits (only 45% of my usual salary though). unfortunately, on may 31st 2024, my government announced that they are significantly cutting the funding & tax credits for the vfx industry where i live. what does this mean? mass lay offs. thousands of canadians and other people in the world working in the industry are losing their career, including me. there will only be about 20% vfx jobs left where i live by 2025. vfx shops and production houses have already started to close doors here. i'm still mourning this career i have been working in for 8 years and loved, even tho it's been difficult and demanding at times (lots of overtime), but there are just no jobs right now (unless you are a senior vfx artist with decades of experience) and the future will only get more bleak. i could move abroad and follow the industry that is already moving somewhere else, but i don't want to do that on my own (i am already super lonely as it is!!) and i can't afford it.
my unemployment benefits will run out by the last week of september. in 4 weeks. i've been sending resumes everywhere, both online and in person, but i am just not getting anything in return. even tho i have over 15 years of experience working in various jobs and i have never been fired from anywhere. even tho my resume and cover letters are solid because they have been approved my professional counselors (a free service for people under 35 where i live). so much for they're hiring everywhere...
since my vfx compositing skills are very niche and not really applicable to much else, i decided to go back to school, taking college classes in the admin and excecutive assistant fields, since it's something that i think would be good for me and there are lots of jobs for that here. i will be getting some financial aid, but it's nowhere near enough to survive. it will only cover my rent, and that's because my rent is super cheap for my city. my college classes start on september 30 and i am excited for it, but also very stressed because i still don't have a part time job.
i've been living on my own with a small salary for over 10 years now, but it truly is the first time that i'm struggling this hard. i honestly don't have anything worth selling except some taylor swift perfumes, which i sold this week. i also have over 6k of credit debt and another 4.5k of school loans left to pay. at the bare minimum i will need about $1.000 CAD/month to cover my other bills and expenses after rent, hence why the need for a job ASAP. i am desperate and my mental health has been a huge mess. this is why i decided to open my ko-fi accounts. not that i'm expecting much, but anything can help, i think.
i don't have much to offer in exchange, except gifs? i'm wondering if (cheap, low price) gif commissions are a thing? i have no idea know, but i set up a poll on my ko-fi page to see if anyone would be interested.
thank you for reading if you've made it here, it's appreciated 💖
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thesirencult · 11 months ago
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Pick A Card : Soul Connection
An intuitive reading about a soul meant to find yours. In epic tales there is a literally mechanism called "recognition". The hero and his counterpart recognize eachother even after years of estrangement. Like Penelope and Odysseus. A love so deep not even multiple lifetimes can erase. A soul kindred to yours you would recognize in a sea of people.
"I could recognize him by touch alone, by smell; I would know him blind, by the way his breaths came and his feet struck the earth. I would know him in death, at the end of the world."
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disclaimer : a tarot reading should never be used in place of professional counselling. Your reading cannot offer legal, medical, business, or financial advice nor does any portion of your reading herein purport to. You should not rely on a tarot reading to make any decision that would affect your legal, financial, or medical condition. If your inquiry involves the law, finance, or medicine, then you should seek the advice of a licensed or qualified legal, financial, or medical professional. Also, tarot reading cannot replace qualified mental health care. A tarot reading can only facilitate how you cope spiritually with a given situation.
PILE 1
The soul meant to find yours is a gentle one. Themes that come up here remind me of couples like Queen Victoria and Albert. I t will be love at first sight. Whatever your genders are, the "supposed" feminine will be the dominant one.
Your person will take the backseat as you run things. You may come from a wealthier background or simply seem "high value". Lady and the trump vibes.
This person will fight for those who didn't get the same opportunities to grow. They cheer for the underdog. This person will love your firey nature and how "bossy" you are. One thing you have to be careful with in this relationship is to keep things balanced as sometimes they might feel like you do not respect them or you don't spend enough time with them.
They could be an INFJ. Sympathetic, compassionate and protective. Practical and detail oriented, this is the safe place you need to come back to after your long trips towards the stars.
PILE 2
The love of your life will be able to see you. The real you. They won't overlook the greyness in your face. "You're Losing Me" by Taylor Swift is a song that can talk about your past.
No one stopped hurting you even though they knew they wouldn't be able to bring you back. They didn't care.
This person is everything that you deserve. They will help you heal. No sad songs with this one. Your happily ever after. This person is a soldier. They would die for love.
Your people pleasing tendencies won't go unnoticed with this one. They care about YOU, not what you can do about THEM.
Give them a chance when they come around. Sweet energy. Safe. Boy-Girl-They next door energy. A sweetheart with a great smile and a kind glint in their eyes. My heart feels warm writing about them. Hallmark movies ain't got nothing on them. Their love is simple and "perfect". No questions and worries. Your safe place.
Your energy reminds me of those wedding photos you see on Instagram of couples in small American towns posing with their golden retriever and smiling at each other. Don't let your past wounds f*ck this up. Sincerely, from one people pleaser to another. If you picked this pile we would have been besties in real life. Lots of love and hugs your way.
P.S. They will always choose you. You are not the first, but the ONLY choice.
PILE 3
Your whole life you have felt alone and isolated. Like life is a party you have not been invited. I wouldn't say you are a "pick me", you are far from that. You just feel like there is no one there for you to keep your hands warm. You have always longed for someone that will look behind the mirror and realize there is someone is behind it. You struggle with finding your inner voice.
The catch here is that you have the ability to choose anyone behind the mirror. You have the ability to show who you truly are. Be wild and crazy. Unstoppable. You didn't come here to do pretty and quiet. You are here to awake others and break the glass.
The person meant for you, your other half is very different from you. They are way more hedonistic and may find solace is the material realm. They will do everything to make you feel wanted and beautiful. This person will see you for who you truly are and they won't feel intimidated. Your "black cat energy" won't drive them away. They have some skeletons in the closet themselves. Disturbing and compelling, this one would make a great "50 Shades Of Grey" type of movie. lol. They could listen a lot to the Weeknd or they used to live a very "rough" lifestyle in the past. Love at first sight. Intense. You slap them and they will kiss you. They will buffle you. "Why doe sthis mfer stick around somehow?".
In all honesty, in this lifetime, your other half will be overbearing. They won't back down until they take you down with them. Penelope Cruz and Javier Bardem come to mind in Jamon Jamon. This person may also come from money or have a lot of money and they want you to be their dark princess/prince. It will feel like taking a panther or feral cat and trying to domesticate it. Good try. You are still dangerous though, but they don't mind a few scratches.
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eddiesxangel · 1 year ago
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Wildflower Pt.2 | Rockstar!Eddie x Pop!Princess Reader
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Summary: After your breakup with Eddie, you got everything you’d ever wanted. The career, the success, the fame, but something was still missing.
Cw: no use of y/n reader is referred by pet names. Eddie x Afab girly girl reader, no descriptions of reader is used other than what they are wearing (we like to keep it inclusive in this house) ANGST mentions mental health struggles, prescription medication, alcohol consumption, mentions of weight loss due to mental health issues, mentions of underage drinking, SMUT soft Dom Eddie, daddy kink? FLUFF so much you might wanna vomit lol, pregnancy 👀
WC: 22.5k lol
Read part 1 here
Rain, he wanted it comfortable I wanted that pain. He wanted a bride I was making my own name.Chasing that fame. He stayed the same. All of me changed like midnight.
As you stepped off the stage of the last show of your sold-out stadium tour, the adrenaline rush pulsed through your veins. Happy tears threatened to fall down your cheeks. You have been working your ass off these past four years. 
Four Years. 
It has been four years since your career took off and hasn’t stopped—four years since your single went number one for thirty-six weeks straight on Billboard 100. Four years since you last saw Eddie. The way you'd left things haunts you to this day.
The first year after the breakup was the hardest. You were nothing but a shell of yourself; you put on a front with everyone. If you let yourself think about Eddie, you wouldn’t have been able to climb out of the hole you had dug yourself out of. You couldn’t muster up the motivation to do anything for yourself when alone. You worked and went home to sleep, wake up and repeat, like a machine. 
You stopped going to events you didn’t need to be at. You punish yourself by not allowing yourself to have any fun. You felt like you didn’t deserve it.
You had lost a lot of weight that year, unable to keep anything down. Your body was in severe malnutrition, and your doctor was worried. You were prescribed some medication to help stabilize your moods. You blamed it on stress, that the job was the problem, brushing it off like you would get over it eventually, or at least that is what you told yourself. That was your life the year you and Eddie broke up.
Eventually, as the years went on, you found better ways to cope with the loss of Eddie and Violet Rose in your life. Slowly, you started dating again about a year later, but everything was different from what you experienced with Eddie. You didn’t have that spark you felt with Eddie. But was that real? Or was it all built up? 
Seeing Eddie back in the limelight as a single man broke your heart, and seeing him taking out different girls was so painful it made you physically sick. You first saw him out with another woman only two months after you ended things… Did he even really love you? You'd convinced yourself that Eddie must have been caught up with everything that he only thought he was in love with you? And now that you were out of the picture, he realized that it was just lust, nothing more... because how did it only take two months until he was out with another woman? 
The hardest part about this was avoiding him at all the award shows and parties. Your worlds were intertwined, your label was the same, your career had taken off after the breakup, and you were invited to more Hollywood events. It was difficult when you knew he was in the room with you, especially with another girl by his side.
You were still so desperately in love with him after all this time…
It was never the same girl; he was back to his old ways, sleeping around with anyone who got the chance. But luckily, you never ran into him because the second you got word he was there, you were gone, making your last memory of him when he walked out of the door in Italy. You had shattered his heart. Broke it into a million pieces, or so you thought. He told you he was in love with you, and you couldn’t say it back. Year after year, things started to get easier; once the tabloids got bored about the breakup and Eddie was seen with different women, the focus was no longer on you. You had thrown yourself into your songs.
Your songs became #1 hits less than a week after each release. You had been that good, a bit too good. Your work was the only thing you let yourself focus on. Everything had to be great, or all of this would have been for nothing. The more writing you did, the more focused you were on your music and the less time you had to think about Eddie. That was the whole point of the breakup, right? Because you used Eddie only to help your career… 
🎸𖤐𝄞💿𓆩🎧𓆪 🎸𖤐𝄞💿
Life for Eddie Munson over the past four years had been the worst of his entire life, and he once had been addicted to coke. He did not expect his early forties would be so…depressing. When you had ended things with him, he never felt that kind of earth-shattering heartbreak before, not when his second try at passing his senior year didn’t pan out, not when Sarafina left him alone with their baby, and not when his parents abandoned him. 
He was too stubborn to grovel; you had told him that you clearly were just doing this for yourself. He had let his emotions get in the way; it was all his fault. He saw that now. He knew that you loved him back, but he was scorned. He wouldn’t be the one to reach out. The story was out; nothing more could be done. He didn’t have the heart to give up the ring he had bought for you. Night after night, Eddie would sit up and stare at it. He hugged your pillow because your scent lingered in the room until one day, it was gone. 
One morning, a few weeks after the breakup, Eddie was awakened to the sweet smell of vanilla and cinnamon wafting through the house; for a split second, he thought you had returned to him. He ran downstairs looking for you, but reality hit like a brick when he followed the scent to the kitchen to see Vi had ordered Cinnabon to the house. She offered him his share, thinking it would cheer him up, but it had only made Eddie nauseous. He could no longer stomach the sweet smell that reminded him of you.
Longing for you to be by his side, he cried night after night, hating himself for feeling so pathetic and unwanted. That’s how his whole life was; he should have known better. His parents didn’t want him, and the mother of his child didn’t want him, so what would make you any different? 
Your breakup not only affected Eddie’s life but also Violet Rose’s. Scorned by how you never even said goodbye, she was hurt. She begged Eddie to let her talk to you, but Eddie refused to speak your name. Your music no longer brought her joy; only waves of sadness washed over her when she heard you on the radio. She couldn’t escape; you haunted her just as much as you haunted Eddie. 
Violet Rose felt the change in her father when he got back from his vacation in Italy. She was so excited to see him; she missed the both of you profoundly, but when she greeted her dad when he returned, she could sense something was off. When she went to let off her hug, and he didn't, she knew. She could feel how tense he was, how tightly he held onto her. The way he almost let a tear slip and the sniffle he made in her ear gave it away. He hadn't reacted like this when he was away from her for months on tour the year prior. When he finally let go of her, she needn't ask. She knew his eyes were bloodshot and swollen; he wasn't bubbly and didn't hum anymore. She knew her father's heart wasn't the same. 
The older Vi got, the more she resented her father for not ever letting her know who her birth mother was. On top of that, she wasn’t allowed to talk about you. She didn’t understand why because Eddie never explained what happened. All she knew was that before he left for Italy, he had asked her if it would be okay if you were to be in their lives permanently. He showed her the pink diamond ring. The ring that to this day still sits in Eddie’s bedside table drawer. She had found it a few weeks back while trying to find the weed she knew her dad had hidden somewhere when he caught her smoking by the pool. 
That was the last straw for Violet Rose. Violet Rose no longer cared about consequences after seeing the reminder of why their lives had changed so dramatically. You didn’t, so why should she? You made her think that you never cared. How could you be so cruel to just leave her? You were going to be her Mom. She had believed that she was finally going to get a mother; the one thing she craved the most her whole life was ripped out from under her. 
🎸𖤐𝄞💿𓆩🎧𓆪 🎸𖤐𝄞💿
Tonight was the night of a new club opening, and Roger ensured you were on the VIP list, not that it took much convincing for you to go. You wanted to get dolled up and have some fun with your girlfriends. You pre-gamed and got ready at your best friend Serena's house tonight. 
Over the last few months, you've been feeling much better, finally getting out of the house for more than just work. You started seeing your friends more than twice a year, attending dinners and events with them. You were also being weaned off of your medication because your Dr. decided that your mind and body were going back to your old self, and you insisted you were feeling better.
"Tonight we are finding you a man!” you announced as you blended the pink blusher onto your cheek. 
"Me? How about you, Ms. Chronically single?" she laughed, sipping her drink that smelled like gasoline. All you could do was roll your eyes. It had become easier thinking about Eddie, but it was still a sore subject you didn't speak of much.
"Oh, don't be like that; it was a million years ago," she giggled. The alcohol Serena was downing played a part in being so bold to bring it up. She had met you two years after the breakup; she didn’t know the whole story but knew it was terrible. Nobody knew the story but your parents and Eddie.
“Fine, tonight I will be reckless and throw all caution to the wind." You took a shot of tequila. The burn was quickly chased by the taste of lime. A loud cheer came from your best friend and twirled you around her bedroom. Laughing, you told her you needed her help picking out an outfit. You both decided on the strappy open-back hot pink silk minidress that made you feel like ten million bucks and your hot pink Louis Vuitton heels that matched the exact colour of the dress. Fitting for a Club named The Red Bottom’s. 
Tonight, you felt like you needed to celebrate, wondering what you were celebrating, maybe because you made it out alive? Becoming yourself again? All the hard work you've put in the past four years? You didn't know... what you did know was tonight you were having fun. 
Walking into the dimly lit club named The Red Bottom’s you could feel the beat of the music pulse through your veins as you watched the different colours light up the dance floor. It was packed already, and it was only midnight. You grabbed your friend's hand and dragged her to the bar. Ordering your shots, you pull out your wallet, but the bartender stops you. "Already covered" He nodded his head over to the other end of the bar, and you both made eye contact with two guys. 
From what you could tell, they were about your age, tall, fit, typical Hollywood, and so not your type. Serena grabbed your hand and pulled you over. You checked your phone to see where the rest of your group was, and they told you they had a booth on the left side of the club. 
"Thanks for the drinks." Serena batted her eyes and smiled as you stood by. They introduced themselves; their names were Patrick and Ray. The more you stood with them, the more antsy you got about wanting to get with the rest of the group. 
"Love the new song, by the way." Your head snaps up from your phone, and you give the guy talking a small smile. "Thanks." Great, just another try-hard trying to get into your pants. Trying hard not to roll your eyes, you look to Serena and let her know you're joining the rest of the group. 
Finally breaking through the sea of people on the dance floor, you made your way to the booth tucked away in the back corner. A slew of cheers filled your ears as you approached your friends. 
Serena returned to the booth five minutes later with the two guys on her tail. 
"You promised me," She whispered, climbing up to you. 
"I did promise you, but I didn't promise it would be with one of these two.” You nodded your head in the men’s direction. Serena gave you an annoyed huff. 
"Ok, look, you know that none of them are even my type; you have all the fun you want! Hell, take them both.” You giggled. “I will still be scouting." With that, she laughed and told you to go have a fun time. As you settled with your drink, she went to the dance floor. 
You didn't take long to rejoin Serena for a dance after you finished your cocktail. Scouting the crowd for a man didn’t take much either; being who you are and being in the hottest new club, it didn’t take long for you to find a guy. Your newfound confidence radiated from you, and you spotted him across the room. The epitome of tall, dark and handsome. If you were to look it up in the dictionary, this man’s picture would be there. His rugged, rough edges had you hooked the moment your eyes met. Biting your lip, you wiggled your finger to get him to come to you. It had been so long since you last danced with someone like this. You were excited, and it felt good. This man towered over you, feeling his body swallow you, and he ground his hips against yours. Serena gave you a wink of approval; all she wanted was for you to have fun and let go. 
It felt like you had been dancing for hours. You needed a break and another drink, so you returned to the booth. As you try to make your way back, not looking like baby Bambi holding on to a tall, dark, and handsome man, you discover his name is Maddox; you accidentally bump into someone. 
"Oh my god, I am so sorry!'" You turn to apologize. 
“Watch where you are going, Bitch” she slurred over the music. 
“Excuse you?” You turn to get a good look at who it is, and you feel your heart in your throat.  You look like you have seen a ghost as all the blood from your face drains. You drop Maddox’s hand and bring it up to your mouth. There she was. Four years since she saw you last. However, you would know that face from anywhere. 
Violet Rose was staring at you. Dumbfounded. Her big brown doe eyes go wide, still precisely like her father’s, at the realization of who you are, and then her face drops into more of a scowl. Looking confused, the much older man standing beside her wraps his arm around her protectively. 
You instinctively grab her hand to pull her away. “Hey, get your hands off of her,” The guy yells over the loud bass. He is definitely your age or older.
“I’ll let you know she is sixteen,” you scowl. The guy's hand shoots up off of Violet, and he practically runs away from the both of you.
“How dare you! How could you do this to us?!” She screamed, finally breaking. 
“I’m trying to protect you!” It was so hard to yell over the music.
“Not him!” She flails her arms in the creep's direction. “To me and Dad!” 
She was causing a scene, and you didn’t know what to do; your emotions took over, and you wrapped your arms around the little girl your heart yearned for. 
“I am so sorry, baby. Please forgive me?” You broke, you missed her and her father so much. Even though you weren’t her mother, you were the closest thing she had for a little while. You’re not sure how long you’re hugging her, crying, in the middle of a nightclub when the reality of where you were clicked in.
"What the hell are you even doing in here?! We are leaving!” You were furious; how on earth was she let into a club? When the fuck did she grow up to become a woman? And how was she allowed to leave the house dressed like this? You didn’t even own stilettos that high.
Violet Rose felt all the blood drain from her face. She was in so much trouble. 
“Your father know where you are?” You arched your brows at her.
“Poppy, look, don’t tell my Dad! Please? I’ll go home right now, I swear,” She begged. 
“Absolutely not, get.” You pointed towards the exit and called Tony to bring your car to the front. You didn’t even say goodbye to Serena or Tall, dark and handsome; you just beelined the both of you to the door.  
You stop by the club promoter and bouncers outside as you exit the club. “I don’t know what kind of place you think you are running, but letting in a sixteen-year-old?!” You yell, drawing attention to yourself. Even though it was two in the morning, there were still paps all around, trying to catch a glimpse of the stars entering and exiting The Red Bottoms. The flashing lights were blinding, but you couldn't care less at this moment.
“I'm going to sue this place! I should call the cops for letting in minors! Better yet, I’ll tell her father! Do you know who her father is? Eddie Munson, that’s who!” You shoved your pointer finger into the chest of the club promoter and looked at you blankly.
When you turned, you saw Violet Rose standing there, embarrassed at the commotion you had just made. She looked so small as you walked back over to her; even though she had grown into a beautiful young woman, she was starting to look like her mother. The mother she never got a chance to get to know. You wondered if she knows now that she is older? 
“Get in the car.” You point at your pink G Wagon. 
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to disappoint you.” She hugs her arms around herself.
“Nice try, in.” You were not falling for this act; you had been sixteen once, too. 
“What about your guy?” She asked, deflecting. 
“What guy?” You totally forgot about Tall Dark and Handsome. 
“You were with a guy when I bumped into you and-”
“And called me a bitch?” You finished her sentence. “I don’t know. I met him half an hour ago.” You brushed it off.
“Oh, so you’re not with anyone?” You saw a hint of sparkle in her eye. 
“Violet Rose get. in. the. car.” You are not having this conversation with her right now surrounded by paps.
“Fine.” Violet Rose got into the car. A small part of her was happy to see you again; she just wished they were in different circumstances. 
🎸𖤐𝄞💿𓆩🎧𓆪 🎸𖤐𝄞💿
Eddie jolted awake in a cold sweat; his heart sank as he glanced at the clock that read 2:47 a.m. He knew something was wrong as he jumped out of bed, not bothering to put on pants, running out of his room in only his underwear and rushed to Violet Roses's room. He opened the door to see that her window was open and she wasn’t there. 
“Shit, shit, shit, shit” He had a guttural instinct that VR wasn’t here, but he had to check everywhere. 
He first checked her bathroom to see if she had gotten up. She begged him to stay home with her tonight because she was sick. He was supposed to attend a club opening tonight, but how could he leave his Cupcake? Especially when she gave him the puppy dog eyes? They may not have been getting along recently, but he still was the biggest pushover when it came to her. 
They had a good night, other than the fact that she was sick; it was like old times. They curled up on the couch and watched movies; he made her soup, and they enjoyed one another’s company. Something that hasn’t happened in a long time. It made Eddie realize that it was too long; he had been moping around for too long and needed to change, or he would lose VR forever. 
Eddie frantically ran to every other room of the house, calling out her name when he didn’t find her in the bathroom. He was shaking with panic. 
Eddie went back to his bedroom to check his phone to see if he missed any calls or texts, but not one was from Violet Rose or about her. Where the fuck was she? As he calls her phone repeatedly, he runs outside to see if she is out there. Ring after ring, the phone goes to voicemail. He had reached the end of the driveway behind the gate that was still closed. His heart skipped a beat when he saw two headlights of a bubblegum pink G Wagon pulling up to the gates of his estate. He instinctively knows that gaudy thing has to belong to you.
With a deep breath, Eddie opened the gate. The driver slowly pulled up and got out to open the door. Violet Rose is the first to step out and Eddie feels like he can breathe again. She is home, and she is safe. He releases a breath he didn’t know he was holding, but all that relief washes away the second he sees you step out of the car behind her. 
He can feel the anxiety shooting through his arms to the tips of his fingers. He doesn’t understand what is happening. Was Violet Rose hanging out with you behind his back? Was she trying to get back at him? Why would his baby be with you? And why was his baby dressed like that?! 
“Start talking” is all Eddie manages to get out through his teeth. His hands balled up into fists, trying to regulate his breathing. 
You open your mouth to start to explain what happened, but the sight of Eddie standing there in his boxers, chest heaving, you get too overwhelmed at the sight. There is no denying that your attraction to Eddie is still there. You had been mesmerized by the way he looked; his crow's feet were a bit more defined, he was accepting his silver hairs coming in, his skin was pebbled with goosebumps as it was early spring in the middle of the night, and he was practically naked. He was still just as fit, maybe even more so, fuck he made 44 look good. So you stand there with your mouth agape, gawking at him like a moron, until Violet Rose cuts in.
“Hi, Daddy,” it had come out so meek.
“Don’t hi, Daddy. WHERE WERE YOU?” he belted. His face was beat red. You had never seen or heard Eddie so mad, not even on that dreaded day. 
“I found her at the Red Bottom's,” You cut in, giving some slack for Violet Rose. 
“The Red Bottom's? THE RED BOTTOM'S!” It hits him: the new club downtown that he was supposed to attend tonight for the grand opening but didn’t attend because Vi was “sick” and needed to take care of her.
“Inside now.” He was seething, pointing towards the house. Things did not look good for VR. You took that as your cue to leave as you saw her sulk off to the house with her head down. Turning back to the car, you think to yourself this was it. This was your only chance to see him again, and you stood there like a brainless zombie, just ogling him.
“I didn’t dismiss you.” You stop mid-stride and turn slowly as his deep voice filters through your ears. 
“Excuse me?” You question, slowly turning back around.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Eddie was still seething.
“What am I doing?” You countered back.
“Violet Rose is sneaking off to be with you behind my back! How long has this been going on!?” He accused. 
“What the fuck are you talking about, Eddie?” Hearing his name leave your lips was like a gut punch.
“This is all your fault!” He accused again.
“Oh, this is my fault?! How is this my fault? You’re lucky I spotted her and dragged her ass home! You don’t even want to know who she was with when I found her! You’re lucky I did because if I hadn’t, she would still be there doing god knows what with who knows what!” You got in his face. How dare he accuse you of bringing harm to her! You love that kid more than life like she is your own. 
“You know what?!” He counters back.
“What?!” You yell.
What Eddie did next was something so unexpected that it caught you off guard.
“Thank you.” He pulled you into a bear hug. “I was so scared; I didn’t know where she was.” He confessed in a whisper because you were right. Who knows what could have happened to his baby? He was so distraught and mad about the past, but you put his family first after all these years. 
“Eddie, I am so sorry. For everything.” You whisper, finally reciprocating the hug by latching your arms around him. He still smelled the same; it brought comfort, wrapped around you like a warm blanket, and you never wanted to leave.
“No, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have yelled at you.” He shook his head, releasing you. In his fit of rage, he didn’t get to take you in. Fuck. You were more beautiful to him than memories served. 
“No, Eddie. I mean for everything.” You looked down, ashamed that you let things go this far. 
“Oh. I am sorry, too.” He swallowed the lump in his throat. 
“I uh, fuck - I’ll always love you, and uh and Violet. You know that? Right?” You look up at him with glassy eyes, tears threatening to break free. The words he prayed to hear for the past four years finally left your lips. He didn’t know what to think or say. “And I still- shit. I’m sorry you don’t want me- I’m going to go.” You turn, but Eddie catches your forearm to pull you back into him. 
“I let you leave once; don’t for a second think that I am going to let you go again.” 
Not giving it a second thought, Eddie crashed his lips into yours, and everything fell back into place at that moment. The missing puzzle piece had been found and restored back into its space.
“Angel, I am still so in love with you; you’re my entire world. Always have been. Always will be.” He mumbled against your mouth. Eddie could no longer be mad at you; he would not waste another moment on being angry and sad. The last few years of his life were full of it, and he was ready to let that all go because here you are, telling him you love him.
“I’m so sorry, Baby.” You let your tears finally slip past your lashes. 
The closure you had been craving was no longer gnawing at your mind. Eddie loves you and never has stopped long you. You had wasted so much time being sad and lonely. But could it really just be that easy? He would accept you back just like that? So much time has passed, and you are not the same people from four years ago. 
“So what now?” You asked, pulling back. 
“You’re mine.” Eddie pulled you back in to kiss you; he had so much lost time to make up for.
“Eddie, I- what about everything? Do you even trust me? I wouldn’t trust me…” You looked down as the feeling of shame washed over you. You were so stupid for letting him go. 
“Angel, look at me.” He hooked a finger under your chin. No one has called you that name since you left Eddie. Hearing it made your stomach erupt with butterflies. “We will have to work on things, but I am not ever letting you go. I won’t survive if I have to lose you again. Understood?” 
“Yes, Sir.” Your eyes widen as the words slip past your lips. It was instinct to address him that way.
“That's my good girl” He gave a cocky smirk and leaned in to kiss you. He couldn’t get enough; his lifeline had been restored. All of the sadness within him was being plucked away with each brush of your lips.
Sure, you and Eddie had a lot to work on, but Eddie didn’t care.  He had his girl back, his Angel. Things wouldn’t return to normal immediately; he knew that… you knew that. Eddie thought about how he would have to cancel the “date” he had set up for tomorrow as you gave him a last kiss goodbye. Watching you get back into the car was hard, but then he remembered that he had to deal with VR. What the fuck was this night turning into? 
“Don’t worry, I didn’t forget about you.” Eddie walked back into the house to see Violet Rose sitting on the staircase.
“Daddy, do you think?” She was hopeful that what she saw through the window could lead to something more. Something that could bring her family back together. 
“Don’t change the subject.” His head was spinning; he didn’t need to discuss his love life with his sixteen-year-old right after she had snuck out of the house. 
“No phone, no TV, no internet, no going out. You go to school, and you come home. That is final.” 
“What?! That’s so unfair. For how long?!” She cried. 
“Until I say so. Phone, now.” He held out his hand, and she reluctantly placed it on his palm. 
“Don’t you dare ever scare me like that again?! Got it! Now apologize.” He commanded.
“I’m sorry for scaring you, but I’m not sorry for sneaking out tonight.” She smirked.
“Excuse you?” Eddie was shocked.
“If I hadn’t gone out tonight, she wouldn’t have brought me home, and you wouldn’t have that stupid smile on your face.” 
“What stupid smile?” Eddie scowled just to prove a point. 
“Nice try, old man, can’t fool me; I saw you walking up the driveway.” Violet Rose laughed as she made her way up the stairs. Maybe her punishment wouldn’t be so bad if her dad was finally happy again. 
🎸𖤐𝄞💿𓆩🎧𓆪 🎸𖤐𝄞💿
The next day, you had been flooded with missed calls from Roger, and the press had a feel day with your little outburst, all of it being caught on TMZ, of course. 
“Sweetheart, what did you do?” You could no longer avoid the sixth call from him. 
“Look, Rog, I had a lot of alcohol, and Violet Rose was there; she is only sixteen. What was I supposed to do?-” 
“Nothing,” Roger cut in.
“Absolutely not. I have morals, Roger.” You could just picture how he was sitting at his desk, pinching his brows because you knew you were giving him a headache. 
“Look, everyone is going to be poking around, thinking you and Munson are back together. Now I know that contract has ended an-” 
“We are back together,” you cut him off. There was a few seconds of silence because he needed to process what you had just said.
“What?” He asked. 
“I said Eddie and I are back together. For real, no contracts, no bullshit.” You couldn’t get the stupid grin off of your face if you had tried. 
“Oh, well, um, wow, this is unexpected; I’m so happy for you!"  
“Really?” Your voice went up an octave.
“Of course, sweetheart, this is excellent news; I have been worried about you; something in you changed, and you tried to cover it up, but I know you… and also will bring up more publicity. Everyone loves it when couples get back together! Look at J-Lo and Affleck; no one could stop talking about them for weeks!” 
“Well, I guess this whole nightclub thing will blow over?” You wince, biting your thumb.
“Should be fine; when are you announcing your relationship? How long has it been?” Roger questioned.
“Oh, um, well, it just happened last night, so let's give it a few weeks and see how things play out…” fuck, this was not supposed to be another publicity stunt. 
“Understandable. I’ll contact you in a few days to see what’s happening, OK? Kisses” 
“Bye Rog” You hung up the phone to see Eddie was calling you.
Eddie asked you to meet up with him today and go on a walk to clear up things. You felt an overwhelming sense of being home when he opened his door. He was still in the same house, and it looked like only a little visually had changed over the years. 
Eddie greeted you with a hug and a kiss that lingered for a while. The familiarity of his lips on yours gave you an overwhelming sense of comfort. He made you feel at home. 
Eddie took your hand and closed the door behind him, ready to go. 
You just walked through the neighbourhood, having it be a gated community; no one would bother the two of you. 
“I can’t believe this is happening.” You laugh, shaking your head.
“Same, but I’m happy that it is.” Eddie brought your hand up to his mouth to kiss the back of your hand.
“I don’t really know where to begin…” you trailed off, looking out at the California skyline. 
“Let’s start off with how have you been?” Eddie genuinely asked.
“Honestly, I’ve been doing much better than I had been over the last few years. I was in an awful place after it all happened. I wanted to talk with you badly but knew you hated me.” You looked down at your shoes, still ashamed about how you left things. 
“I could never hate you, Angel. I was stubborn and so hard-headed that I refused to grovel. But I regret every day that passed that I didn’t try to get you back.” Eddie admitted.
“Really?” You look at him with shock. You had convinced yourself that Eddie was never in love with you that the thought of him being heartbroken escaped your mind. 
“Of course, Angel. Don’t you remember where I was taking you when… uh-”
“When I ran away…. Yeah, I remember. But I convinced myself that it was just... I don't know? lust…” 
“Hmmm,” that caught Eddie off guard. What could he have done to make you think he wasn’t being raw and honest with you? 
Eddie debated whether he should tell you about the ring as you walked in uncomfortable silence. He decided against it; he felt it wouldn’t be right. 
“I never asked how you have been?” You look to Eddie as he is lost in thought. 
“Bad. No sense in lying to you. I’m sure Vi will tell you eventually.” He sighed. 
Your heart dropped at his confession. He seemed to be doing well. He was the hottest bachelor at the moment. 
“I feel like a broken record, but I’m truly sorry, Eddie. I was such a mess after everything, and I thought you hated me, so I couldn’t talk to you, and it got so bad I couldn’t get out of bed. My doctor put me on meds because I literally didn’t want to do anything, and I missed you and Violet Rose so bad! I felt like my heart had been ripped out of my chest. Not to make this about me, but I just wanted to let you know my decision was wrong, and I hated myself daily. And I will try my best to make it up to both of you. I promise I’ll never leave you like that ever again…. That's if you’ll have me.” 
“Your doctor put you on medication?” He looked at you with concern. 
“Ugh, yeah. I’m slowly coming off of them now; it’s been about two months. I’m feeling a lot better.” You admit
“Jesus Angel. You should have told me! I would have done anything for you, you know that, right?” He said as he pulled you into a hug. 
“I do now,” you whisper. 
“And I’m sorry as well. I should have never yelled at you like that. I felt awful the second I left you standing there alone in that big empty house… I sold it, by the way… I couldn’t go back. The memories were too… sour.” He looked down to his chest. 
“Well, I can’t stomach Italian food anymore… makes me sick even thinking about it.” You admit with a  shudder, trying to lighten the mood.
“And I can’t eat Cinnamon Rolls anymore because of you,” he admits. 
You look at him quizzically.
“Reminded me too much of your perfume… it uh… made me sick whenever I smelled vanilla and cinnamon.” He shrugged
You looked at him with such sorrow. The both of you were so fucked up by what happened. How could you ever work through this? There was so much hurt to overcome.
“Enough about the past. We are on the same page. We have years to make up for.” Eddie brought your lips to him for a gentle kiss. You wanted so badly to deepen the kiss, but you were in the middle of the suburbs, and any stay-at-home mom desperate for gossip could clock the two of you in a second.
Eddie pulled away, and you made your way back to his place. Once you arrived, Eddie invited you inside. 
“So where is the little criminal?” You asked, entering the living room. Memories flood back to when you would have sleepovers and make forts and Disney movie marathons. 
“Present.” She came waltzing through from the kitchen. 
“Hi Vi,” you walk over to her to embrace her in a hug. It shouldn’t have surprised you when she didn’t hug you back. 
“I’m so sorry for how I left things, but I don’t know how much your dad told you?” You look to Eddie and see him shake his head no. “I, uh, I think you are old enough to know some details?” You and Eddie discussed on your way back home that VR also had to be on board for this to work. She had to know the truth. 
“Come sit, Cupcake.” Eddie patted the couch cushion next to him.
You and Eddie then explained how, at first, the entire thing was a sham, but you ended up falling for one another in the end, but things had to break off because of the contract. 
“You’re joking?” That was Violet Rose’s first response. 
“Unfortunately not,” You speak up. 
“That is the most fucked up and stupid thing I think I’ve ever heard.” she rolled her eyes.
“Hey, language. Don’t make me extend your punishment.” Eddie pointed to her.
“I’m sorry, but you’re telling me I am supposed to believe you two broke up because of a piece of paper?” She stares dumbfounded.
“Well, yeah, that’s what happened…” Eddie shifted his gaze to you. 
“And you didn’t think to... I don't know? SNEAK AROUND?!” She flailed her arms in the air.
“Uh… no, actually, that never crossed my mind.” Eddie looked at you, and you shrugged.
“You don’t get it. Cupcake things were not that black and white; it was complicated.” 
“Whatever, can I go to my room now?” She rolled her eyes. 
“Fine, go.” Eddie sighed. 
“Don't worry, she will come around eventually. She was excited last night and started questioning if we would be back together.” Eddie smirked. 
That made you feel better; you would hate for Violet Rose not to see you in the same light as before. 
🎸𖤐𝄞💿𓆩🎧𓆪 🎸𖤐𝄞💿
A month passed, and yours and Eddie’s schedules conflicted. You were recording your new album, and Eddie was busy with the band. Nothing had been coordinated until today, your first official date, and you told Eddie you were planning the whole thing because it was the least you could do for him. 
You drove to Eddie’s house mid-afternoon to pick him up. 
“Absolutely not.” As you pulled up in your baby pink vintage convertible Cadillac, he shook his head. Eddie Munson may be a sim, however, he still has an image to keep up with. He would not be seen being chauffeured in a pink car, especially by his woman. He was old school, and he would be the one driving them.
“What do you mean?” You pout. God, he was such a sucker for that face you pull, but he would stand his ground. 
“I’m driving,” Eddie stated plainly. 
“But I’m the one treating you.” You state. 
“Don’t care. Not going in that gaudy thing.” He crossed his arms. 
You roll your eyes as you unwillingly step out of the car. 
“Don’t think I didn’t see that.” His tone was serious, but his eyes said otherwise as he took your hand and kissed the top of it. 
“Hi, Princess.” He smiled 
“Hi, Baby.” Everything felt right again like nothing had changed. 
“Just tell me where we are going.” Eddie walked around to the passenger side to open the door for you. You ignored his request as you got into his black Bentley Continental. You punched the address into the GPS and were on your way.  
“Le Labo?” Eddie questions when you arrive at the destination. 
“It’s a custom perfumery. Since you said you can’t stomach mine anymore, I called and made an appointment to make one for each other?” You bite your nails in anticipation. Did he hate the idea? Was it too boring? 
“This is not what I was expecting at all, Angel, but this is really cool.” he pulled you into his side as you walked into the building. 
After smelling all the smells and finally deciding on a concoction for one another, your perfumes were complete, and you could take them home. For Eddie’s, you choose notes of nutmeg, white musk, and jasmine. You named his Dungeon Master. Eddie picked a more floral scent for yours with notes of tuberose, jasmine, and tonka bean and called it Angel Wings. He made you wear it as soon as you stepped out of the perfumery.  
The next stop for your date was your house. Eddie had never been to your home. You managed to buy one two years ago and were able to sell your condo. You were happy to have a new space, one with happy memories. 
You managed to snag a bungalow in Bel-Air for just under five million. It needed some updating, so you’ve been slowly making renovations. It was almost done to your liking; you just had to finish up the guest bathroom, and then it would be perfect. 
The whole house was very you. In the kitchen was your favourite part of the home. The cabinets and countertops were white, and the backsplash, appliances, and cookware were all pink. The house was an open concept, which you loved; it was very light and airy with little clutter, but it looked homey. It's very much the exact opposite of Eddie’s interior decor. There were floor-to-ceiling windows all over that let in a lot of natural light. You had a massive sectional in the living room that you often fell asleep on because it was that comfortable. Your favourite part of the house was the living room that opened into the back patio, which led into the pool. Your garden was lush and complete; a giant hedge that acted as a privacy wall surrounded the yard so no one could see in. It was your own little piece of paradise. 
“I didn't know you moved?” Eddie asked, pulling into your driveway. 
“How could you’ve?” Even though the two of you had made up, the wounds were still fresh. You didn’t mean anything by your comment, but you sensed it irked Eddie. 
“I’m sorry-
“Angel, if you apologize one more time,” he gives you a look of warning before stepping out of the car and running over to your side.
 Some things never change. 
“So what is next on the schedule?” Eddie asked as he followed you into your home. 
“Thought I could cook you dinner.” You smile as you lead the both of you into the kitchen. 
You hear Eddie chuckle behind you.
“What?” You turn, arms crossed, to see him examining your space.
“I expected nothing less from you.” He chuckled as he pulled you into him by the waist. 
Eddie leaned down to kiss you. This was the first kiss you shared since reuniting almost four weeks ago. You lean into it as you uncross your arms to wrap them around the back of his neck. The kiss was tentative at first, nothing but a small peck. Eddie tested the waters as he slowly leaned into you, but you needed more. You pressed into Eddie, raising your tiptoes to press yourself fully into him. He got the hint as his strong hands slipped from your jaw and cascaded down past your waist to grip your ass. A moan slipped from your lips as he massaged his hands into you. 
“Fuck, I missed your noises,” Eddie spoke into your mouth. 
“Mmhmm” you hummed.
“I need you, Angel.” Eddie rubbed his hardening length into your lower abdomen.
“What about dinner?” You pant into his open mouth.
“I’ve waited long enough for you; dinner can wait.” Eddie pushed you back into the kitchen counter, and you took no time tugging at the bottom of his shirt, frantically lifting it over his head. You latch your mouth where his neck meets his collar, nipping and biting until you’ve marked your territory. Eddie whimpered as your hand grazed over the tent his hardened bulge created. Never had Eddie whined like this just from your touch. Eddie froze, unsure what was happening; his body had never reacted this way with anyone. 
“Baby, you ok?” You whispered into his ear as your hand moulded around the thick shaft. There was a shift in the air; Eddie was at your mercy. He didn’t even correct you when you didn’t call him Sir. He nodded and swallowed hard. His heart was racing, his muscular chest was heaving up and down as you delicately traced your hands up to the button of his black trousers. 
“Fuck baby, don’t tease me. I-I-” he shakes his head in a daze.
“Shhhhh, it’s okay, baby, I’ll take care of you.” It’s the least you could do for him. You slide down to your knees, cadged between the kitchen cabinets and your boyfriend. You unzip his pants, and he shimmies out of them as fast as he can. Your mouth waters as Eddie's naked frame towers over you. His thick thighs flex as you run the tips of your long red nails over his flesh. You can see the defined muscle of his legs tighten as you get closer to the apex. 
“Tell me what you want baby.” You graze your glossy lips over the underbelly of his shaft up to the silver ball of his piercing that you craved when you were all alone in the middle of the night. 
“You,” he whispers as he cups your cheek with his right hand. 
“What part of me do you want, Eddie?” You look up at him with eyes glazed with lust. 
It’s been so long that you remember the first time you were on your knees for him. The thrill of the memory brings butterflies to your stomach. 
“All of you.” Eddie pants.
“Uh-uh, naughty boy. Don’t get greedy,” you smirk as you slowly run your hand up and down his shaft.
“Your mouth, Angel. Gimme your mouth. Please.” The anticipation broke when your mouth engulfed his long thick cock into your mouth, wholly. 
You tried your best to fit as much of him as you could. Did he get bigger over the past four years? No? That’s not possible? But you felt so full that you're memory failed you as you tried to get him all down your throat. You came back up in a gasp of air. A string of saliva connected your lips to his tip. You stroked your hand up and down the long shaft. Memorizing each vein as you did. You went back down, and that whimper came back. 
Oh, the lovely little whine coming from Edie’s mouth was making your pussy flutter. You were starting to understand why he loved your moans and whimpers. Hearing them only made your arousal pool in your panties. 
“Please, baby, I need you. I need you so bad.” Having Eddie begging for you was also a new experience that unlocked something in your brain. In all aspects of the term, this larger-than-life man at your mercy was turning you on in ways you never thought possible. You didn’t let up; you worked your tongue around his tip, then slid him back down your throat again. 
“FUCK angel, please I don’t think I can last long. I need to fuck you, baby. Please let me fuck you; let me feel that pretty little pussy.” He was begging, and you were thriving. However, the need for him to fill you was becoming greater than the feeling he was giving you when he was begging, so you let up. With a pop, you let his throbbing member out of your mouth. Eddie hiked you up off the floor and started to strip you down as fast as he could. 
“Where do you want me?” he asked as he kissed down your neck. He let a finger trail up your sticky inner thighs. 
“Don’t care,” you shake your head. 
“Bedroom?” He looks over his shoulder down the hall to where he assumes your room is. 
“No time.” You turn so you’re bent over the kitchen countertop. 
“Always so ready for me.” Eddie swiped a single digit up your wet slit. 
“Fuck me, fuck me hard,” you pleaded.
“Yes, ma’am,” you heard the smirk in his voice. 
Eddie tugged your hair as he pulled your head to the side so he could kiss you, it was sloppy and wet, so much tongue, but it didn’t matter when you felt the tip of his cock run up and down your folds. The metal ball of his ring was cool against your hot clit. Your body shivered as it brushed against you before slipping past your entrance. You pushed your body back into Eddie so he could fill you as fast as possible. 
Eddie’s grip on your hair tightened as he yanked your head back so you were arching into him. The leverage he had using your head as a vice to slam into you over and over. His other hand explored your chest, harshly gripping your breast. You’re sure his fingertips will be scorched into your skin forever.
“Fuck I missed this pussy” he growled into your ear as his hot breath cascaded over your skin. The room was full of the wet sound of Eddie pounding into you. His harsh thrusts didn’t slow as he fucked himself into you. He pulled out entirely, and you cried at the loss of him.
“Just needed to taste you.” You felt his hands spread apart your cheeks. His warm tongue replaced his cock, travelling its way from one hole to the other. A feral moan left your lungs, and before you knew it, he was back hovering over you, guiding his cock back where it belonged.
“Nobody compares to you” his praises didn't match his movement; if you hadn’t known any better, you swore he was hate fucking you right now… and maybe he was? He had years of pent-up feelings about you. 
“This is my pussy understand? It belongs to me and only me,” his grip finally left your hair as his hand slid down to your throbbing clit.
“Yes, Sir.” You cried as his fingertips made contact.
“Tell me,” he demanded.
“I’m yours, baby. I am yours,” you spoke after each thrust up into you.
“Fuck I love you so much; tell me you love me. I need to hear it.” Eddie’s thrusts hadn’t let up; you were a bit shocked by the stamina; even your legs were about to give out.
“I love you. I love you. I love you. I love you.” You chanted like a mantra. The feeling in your lower stomach was forming. Eddie kissed down the side of your neck; the butterflies were starting with each circle of his fingers, each harsh bite and nip at your neck, each thrust hitting you so deep, the spot you’d been so desperate to get to but no matter how many times you tried on your own you just couldn’t. 
“I’m cumming!” Your body trembled, your pussy clenched down so hard you knew your body would soar in a few minutes.
“Shit, I’m close. Tell me how much you want me.” He spoke through his teeth.
“Please, Sir! Fill me, I want you so bad,” you cry.
“You want this cum baby? Do you want me to pump my load into you? That it? You want me to make you mine?” Eddie growled.
“Yes!” You nod.
After only a few more thrusts, Eddie came not long after you, pumping his load into you further and further until he slipped out of you. You collapse your body onto your kitchen counter as Eddie hangs his body weight over you, caging you in. 
“Baby, you ok?” You feel Eddie wrap his arms around your middle. 
“Yeah, just need to feel you.” He mumbled into the side of your neck. You could feel the warm cum dripping down your trembling legs. The realization hit you that you didn’t use protection. Your body stiffened, and Eddie caught on, “What’s wrong, baby?” He got up so you could turn to face him. You kissed him, not wanting to ruin the moment. He deserved one good day with you, and would a baby so bad? Having his baby. No, you dreamed of having his baby all the years ago. 
Eddie deepened the kiss, and your thoughts dispersed; Eddie was the only thing clouding your brain. He picked you up, latching your legs around his waist. 
“You going to show me your bedroom now, little lady?” He kissed down the other side of your neck, mirroring the marks he had left on the other side. 
“Down the hall, second door on the left.” Eddie was already walking before you finished taking it. He entered your room and threw you on the bed to climb onto you.
“Really, you’re ready for round two?” Your question, even you still need some recovery time, 
“You wound me, princess.” He drops his head as his large tattooed hand covers his heart. You then notice when he moved his hand that below where Violet Rose's name was etched into his skin over his heart was a tattoo you hadn’t seen before. A small pair of blacked-out angel wings with a halo hovering above. 
Your hand shot up to trace over the ink in his skin. 
“Eddie.” You whispered. 
Eddie looked down to see what made your eyes glaze over. The realization that you hadn’t seen it yet hit him hard. He wasn’t sure why he acted on impulse that day, but something in him told him he had to keep you close to his heart, that he couldn’t let you go. So he got this tattoo dedicated to you a year after the breakup.
He cleared his throat; he was a little embarrassed by how desperate he was for you. How desperate he still is for you.
“Look, I-” You didn’t let him finish because you pulled him down into you by the back of his neck to kiss him. To really kiss him, a kiss to show him that you love him, that you always loved him, that you were sorry for ever hurting him. 
“I love you,” you mumbled into his mouth. A shit-eating grin formed on Eddie’s face. He couldn’t get enough of you saying those words, and now you said it first, unprovoked. He slid down your body. 
“Hey, where are you going?” You whined at the loss of his warm body hovering over you. 
“I don’t get to worship my girl properly.” He parted your sticky legs.
“Eddie, you just came. You sure you want to?” You questioned, clamping your legs together. 
“When has that ever stopped me before?” he pried open your knees. Not wasting another second, he was lapping at your clit, sending you into a cloudy euphoria.
🎸𖤐𝄞💿𓆩🎧𓆪 🎸𖤐𝄞💿
“Come home with me?” Eddie asked the following day. You’d been intertwined with one another all night, not leaving one another for a moment. Not even when you got up to go to the bathroom. You didn’t want to waste another second apart. You never thought you would be this happy again; the ecstasy flowing through you was giving you a high. 
“I want you to meet Wayne.” he snuggled his head into the crook of your neck. 
“I would love to,” you sighed.
“Good, we are going back in two weeks; Violet hasn’t seen her Pops in too long.” He smiled.
“You never told me much about him before?” You shifted in the sheets to face him. 
You absentmindedly reached over to play with his hair. 
“Not much to say,” he shrugged.
You gave him a pointed look that told him he wasn’t getting out of this conversation.
“Fine,” he chuckled. “He is a stubborn old grump who took me in when he didn’t need to. He really is a softy on the inside, especially when it comes to his granddaughter.” He sighed. 
“Sounds like he is a really good guy,” you smile.
“He is, won’t admit it though, he is a very humble man, and it took years in order to convince him to live in the house I got him instead of the trailer I grew up in. I literally had to have it moved into the backyard with the house to convince him to leave that place.” He laughed. 
You needed to meet the man who raised Eddie to thank him for doing such a good job. It meant so much to you that he would want you to meet him, especially after everything that happened. 
“I can’t wait to meet him.” You kiss him gently.
“Good because I already told him you are coming. Gotta show off my girl to everyone. 
Eddie’s words made your heart flutter. You still couldn’t believe this was happening and that he didn’t hate you. 
The following two weeks had flown by. Trying to convince Violet Rose that you are staying for good was much more complex than you thought. She was very standoffish and didn’t give you much to work with. When you spoke to her, she would give grunts and one-word answers if you were lucky. Being a teenage girl means approaching with a topic of interest, and with VR growing up so much since you’ve seen her, it’s been hard to wiggle your way back in.
School was not a discussion topic; partying was also a sore subject because she was still grounded, so on your flight back to Indiana, you tried again. She gave you the cold shoulder, still not forgiving you. Not understanding at all why you had left. You were starting to question why you left things as you did. It didn’t make sense in retrospect. She was right, you could have snuck around, you could have “broken up” and gotten back together weeks later. But in the moment, everything was too much; you were overwhelmed by everything you weren’t thinking about. Now, as a thirty-year-old, you have learned so much. You were not ready for many things that came your way but you got through them; and on your own. Giving yourself room to grow and become your best was probably the best thing that came out of this situation. 
“Hey, old man,” Eddie yelled into the empty foyer of Wayne’s quaint bungalow. 
Violet Rose pushed past the both of you and walked into what you believed to be her bedroom just off the front door. 
“Finally, I’ve been waitin’ round for ages! Can’t that dang plan of yours go any faster?” Wayne rounded the corner as he entered the long hallway. He embraced Eddie in a thigh hug, snaking his back a few times before letting go.
“Angel, this is Wayne” he smiled brightly
“Pops, this is my Angel.” You smile at Wayne before he opens his arms for a hug hello. 
Wayne knew of you from the past. Mainly when he spoke with his granddaughter. She spoke so highly of you all those years ago.
“I’m so happy to finally meet you.” You squeezed your arms around the elderly man. 
“Pleasure’s all my darlin'.” he pulled back to get a good look at you, then looked around. “Where’s my Grandbaby?” 
Eddie chuckled and then pointed towards the door. “Don’t think she could get away that easy?” Wayne smirked. 
Violet must have heard the conversation because she stepped out of the room and was changed into her sweats and an old Corroded Coffin shirt.
“Hey, Gramps.” She smiled slightly and leaned into him for a hug.
“Hey baby girl, you get taller? Damn, I haven’t seen you in so long” he brushed her curly locks down as he patted her head.
“Probably, but I think I’m done now,” she giggled. It was the first time you had seen her in a good mood. 
“Well, let’s quit standing in the hallway; come in!” He waves the three of you into his home.
Wayne cooked a delicious dinner, and then Eddie showed you around the only trailer that sat in the backyard. He wasn’t kidding when he said Wayne wouldn’t move unless it went with him.
Eddie showed you around his old bedroom; he said it was like stepping into a time machine. Everything had been left as it was when he left at 21. 
You teased him when you found an old Playboy that was very well-used. His cheeks flared up as you flipped through the dusty pages. He told you there used to be a display of mugs, the same one that was now inside the house, and a bunch of trucker hats that also used to be a staple, but now we’re probably in his bedroom collecting dust there. 
When you went back inside, you saw Wayne and VR huddled around the pool playing a game of Snooker. It was nice to see Violet Rose enjoying her time around you rather than sulking like a moody teenager. 
Eddie announced that both of you would join in the next round, and Violet rolled her eyes so much for progress. 
The rest of the night was relatively peaceful. Only one more snarky remark from Violet Rose got a stern response from her Pops, telling her off for talking back to her elders. 
“Don’t you teach this girl any manners? Did I not raise you to respect people?” Wayne grumbled. 
“You try raising a teenage girl, then come back to me; maybe I’ll leave her here for the summer,” Eddie smirked, which got a rise out of Violet. 
“I love you, Gramps, but I would rather die than live in Hawkins,” she winced. 
“Don’t blame ya, Sweet-pea, but I think all that Hollywood California L. A bullshit, pardon my French, has gotten to that head of yours ” he shook his head. 
Eddie couldn’t help but laugh; it was so infectious you tried to hold in your giggles. 
“You guys are the worst! Just try and be a teenager now!” She dropped her pool cue and stormed off to her room. 
You looked at Eddie and gave a sympathetic smile; if anyone knew what she was going through in this room, it would be you. You went after her to see if she would open up to you. 
You tentatively knocked on the door three times before she told you to go away.
"Vi, can I please come in?" you speak through the door.
"No," you could hear her eyes roll. 
"Come on, Vi, who do you want to talk to you? Me a girl who has been in your position or your Dad?" you wait silently while she contemplates her options. 
"Fine." You hear her get up and walk to the door. She doesn't say anything when she opens the door. She turns and sulks back to her bed, curling her knees to her chest.
"So..." you start while thinking about what to say next. "Want to tell me what is going on?" you sit at the opposite end of her bed; you don't want to crowd her. 
"Not particularly," She mumbled into her knees. 
“Okay," you drew out with a huff. "How about I list off some things that I think are the issues, and you let me know if I'm close?" 
Violet Rose stared at you blankly, but you took that as a yes. 
"Okay... is it about school?" 
"No" 
"Friends?" 
"No"
"A boy?" 
"Not really" 
Okay that's good you were getting somewhere. 
"Not really? So, a boy problem with you? Or someone else?"
"It's about you and Dad." 
"Of course," you sighed.
"It's not that... it's not that I don't want you together because that is all I ever wanted. But I'm scared you're going to leave again." She was so meek. You hadn't seen Violet Rose, so unsure of herself. You reached out your comforting hand, shocked when she let you leave it resting over hers.
"I am so sorry about how I left things with you. I will never forgive myself for not being there to say goodbye. But I promise I am not planning on leaving this time. Your father and I are nowhere near perfect, but we are working on things. And if we ever plan to not continue things between us, I promise you I will always be a part of your life as long as you want me to be. Okay?" you sighed. 
You waited a few seconds in silence before she responded. "Okay.'' She whispered while giving a meek smile. 
"Was that the only thing bothering you?" you chide.
Violet sat and wondered if she wanted to share her feelings about her crush on her friend, Charlotte. Violet knew she liked both girls and boys for a while now but wasn't ready to divulge. She would rather speak about that to her aunts, Robin and Nancy. She shook her head no and said she would have an early night. 
You bid her a goodnight, and when you closed her door, a triumphant smile spread across your face. Progress has been made; that's all you wanted.
You rounded the corner and caught the end of Eddie and Wayne's conversation.
"Don't let this one go again, boy, or else I'll never forgive ya'." 
"Don't worry, I'm not going to let him this time," You said with the same goofy smile.
"You're in a good mood. I'm assuming things went well?" Eddie pulled you in by the waist to sit beside him on the couch. 
"Yeah, she will be okay. Just needed some reassurance, is all." You curled up next to him. 
Eddie didn't say anything more when he gave a kiss to your temple. 
"Told ya she would be good for you son." Wayne tipped the beer bottle to you. 
"Yea, yea, yea, you are always right," Eddie laughed.
It seemed that you were fitting back into their family just perfectly. 
🎸𖤐𝄞💿𓆩🎧𓆪 🎸𖤐𝄞💿
On your second day in Hawkins, Eddie wanted to take you around town and bring you to meet his old friends. He told you that his buddy Steve was hosting a BBQ and invited all of his old high school friends for the occasion. He said you were going to meet everyone. Steve and his wife and kids, Robin and Nancy, who were married; Nancy’s little brother Mike and his Wife El; Dustin and his wife Suzy and their kids; Lucas and his wife Max and their kids; and Luca’s little sister Erica and her partner. You told him you would try to remember everyone’s names, but you made no promises. 
It was all a bit overwhelming to meet everyone all at once, but you felt like you were welcomed with open arms, regardless of what Eddie had told them about you. 
You’d lost Eddie halfway through the evening. Naturally, the men and women separated into their separate groups.
“So tell me about Eddie when he was in high school.” You smirked into your iced tea glass. Everyone else had been drinking tonight, but your stomach was feeling off, probably due to the nerves of meeting everyone tonight. 
“Oh, he was a TOTAL dork,” Robin giggled. 
“Not much of a jock, I’m assuming?” you asked, giggling with her. 
“No, no, but he was a charming guy,” Nancy spoke. “a bit eccentric.”
“No, very eccentric,” Robin corrected with a laugh. 
“But he was always looking out for his friends, sucking up for others, like my brother Mike” Nancy nodded over to the guys who were surrounding the BBQ. 
Robin was someone you gravitated toward the most; she was funny and spunky, and you totally understood why she fell for Nancy. Nancy was kind, warm and not to mention gorgeous. 
This made you smile to know he always had a genuine heart. 
“Sounds ‘bout right,” you sigh. 
Eddie couldn’t break the smile that spread across his face the second you two walked in the door. He was so smitten and very excited to show you off. He finally found his person; all of his hometown friends had settled down for years, getting married in their 20s and having a normal life in the suburbs. He felt like he was finally able to settle down with you. He had already settled down while raising VR but always missed his partner. 
“How did you manage to swing a girl like that, Eds? She has to be half your age,” Steve asks, nodding his head in your direction. 
“She is thirty,” Eddie corrected him, but he knew Steve was only pulling his leg. 
“He’s a famous rockstar now, remember! Not the same nerd from Hawkins High,” Dustin laughed. 
Eddie gave him a stern look. Sure, they were all grown up, but Eddie still saw them as his little sheep. 
“Com’on, dude! It’s been so long since we busted your balls,” Lucas said, wrapping an arm around Eddie's shoulder. 
“Yeah, yeah, whatever y’all are just jealous.” Eddie rolled his eyes, smirking before taking a sip of beer. 
“We are happy for you, dude,” Steve smiled. “You seem much better when she is around. You sound alive again.” He flipped a steak on the grill. 
“Well, my fellow brethren, thank you for everything you’ve done for me; I appreciate it.” “You're getting way too sappy for me; I thought I was standing with the men.” Mike laughed.
The evening was ending; the lot of you were all snuggled up by the bonfire in the backyard of the Harrington residents. 
“So… what do you prefer to be called? Your actual name or Angel?” Steve inquired.
“Whatever you prefer, to be honest, I like both.” You smiled.
“Well, I’m calling you Angel,” Robin piped up, “It's cute,” she smiled.
“It’s all Eddie ever refers to you as; I had no idea it was you he was speaking of when he told us he was bringing a lady friend,” Steve smirked. 
“She’s not just a lady friend; she is his girlfriend,” Dustin chimed in with a grin.
“Well, whatever you are, we are happy you’re here; it’s about time someone tied this one down.” Steve tilted his beer bottle up to toast. 
“Thank you for having me; I’m so happy to meet all of you. Eddie has told me wonderful things about all of you.” You smiled, reaching for Eddie’s hand. 
“Awe shucks, bud. Are you getting all mushy on us?” Steve laughs. 
“Zip it, Harrington,” Eddie said, teasingly pointing a finger. 
“What? I’m just saying… The last time we saw you with anyone was Chrissy... and that was twenty years ago!” He clapped. Steve was drunk.  
Your body tenses and tired to laugh, but up at the thought of Eddie with another girl made you feel icky.
“Yeah, well, I haven’t found anyone close to how Angel makes me feel, so I don’t care how long it took her to find me.” Eddie kissed your cheek with a wet smack. 
Steve cringed at how gushy his friend was, but the ladies fawned over it. They were so happy Eddie finally found his person. They had multiple discussions about how they were worried for his well-being when he started partying again. 
“You both are the cutest. How did you rekindle things? Eddie told us you dated in the past. Nancy spoke.
You told them about how you caught VR in the club and dragged her home, and the rest was history. 
The evening wrapped up around midnight. The car ride home was quiet but not uncomfortable.  Eddie held your hand the whole ride home with a slight smile. Your heart was warm; Eddie had really good people in his life. 
🎸𖤐𝄞💿𓆩🎧𓆪 🎸𖤐𝄞💿
"When do yous two plan on hitting the road?" Wayne asked a few days after your arrival. 
"Trying to kick us out, old man? We just got here," Eddie laughed. 
"No, boy, I just gotta know how much food to buy at the store." He huffed. 
"Well, we will stay for four more days and head out on the 7th. 
Wait? Did Eddie just say the 7th was in four days? That can't be right. You open your phone to look at your calendar. Shit. 
You excuse yourself calmly to go to the bathroom.
You lock the door behind you and open your period tracker app. You were six days late. Okay, no need to panic. The last time you had unprotected sex was... almost every night for the past two weeks... You tried to think back; he pulled out nearly every time. But there was the first night you rekindled the flame; he definitely didn't pull out then… okay. Focus. You’re 30 and not getting any younger, your career is at its peak, and you’re with the man you want to be with forever. Growing your and Eddie’s baby inside you made your heart flutter. Maybe a baby wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. 
You decided to wait a few more days for your period to come just in case it was a fluke. You also didn’t want to take a pregnancy test in Wayne’s house, so you waited until you returned to LA. 
You went out of the bathroom and decided not to tell Eddie anything until you knew for sure. Your mind was racing with all the possibilities. You tried to reel it back in the best you could and engage with the rest of them, but the last few days of the trip have been full of fantasies of a mini-you running around.
🎸𖤐𝄞💿𓆩🎧𓆪 🎸𖤐𝄞💿
When you got home from Indiana, the first thing you did was have your assistant rush to the drugstore. The last thing you needed was to have you papped buying a pregnancy test before you told Eddie anything. It sat on your bathroom counter, taunting you. You were so scared, so nervous about what could be. 
You waited a few days before building up the courage to face reality because your period still hadn’t made its appearance.  
It was six o’clock in the evening, and you had just gotten home from the studio. You had a productive day; you got about 4 songs finished and recorded for the new album coming out in 3 months. You were feeling good about your progress in the studio, and something in you told you to take the test. 
You tried your best to distract yourself in the fifteen minutes for the test to be complete. The longest fifteen minutes of your life were waiting for the results; the second your phone timer went off, you ran back to the bathroom to check the test that sat on the vanity. 
With shaking hands, you lifted it up to your face to see the very prominent plus sign marking the test positive. With a gasp, you felt your stomach erupt in those oh-so-familiar butterflies. You were happy, so happy, you were having a baby! Tears of joy escaped from your tear ducts. You couldn’t believe the news. How are you going to tell Eddie? Would he want to keep it? Would he stay with you? It was so soon; less than two months passed since you had gotten back together. How was VR going to react?! Oh god, you were just getting back in her good graces, this could screw up everything.
The next day, you got an appointment with your doctor; thankfully, they had an opening. They did the blood test, and a day later, they called you to confirm the news that you had been about 3 weeks along. 
You let out the breath you had been holding when you picked up the phone. 
You thanked them and hung up with a shaky hand. The first thing you did was sit and think about your future. You wanted to keep this baby no matter what Eddie's decision will be. You hadn’t booked a tour for this album release yet. You had a meeting with your team next month about it, but would let them know that it would have to be put on hold for now. You hugged your stomach as you thought about how you had not only yourself to think about. You were excited yet terrified all at the same time. 
You were off in your own little baby world the next few days. You had called your mom to tell her because you could no longer keep the secret to yourself.  She was so ecstatic, she cried happy tears, and she called your dad on the phone. She soothed your worries about having to tell Eddie. She reassured you that even if he didn’t want to be a part of the baby's life, she would be there for you, but she also reminded you how he raised a baby all on his own because he could never give up a child. That settled your nerves a bit, but you were still scared out of your wits. 
You spent the afternoon talking to her, brainstorming ways of how you would tell Eddie. Your mom and you thought it would be cute to give him a custom onesie that said “Corroded Coffins smallest fan.” You go on ordering that immediately; you don’t want to keep the secret any longer. 
🎸𖤐𝄞💿𓆩🎧𓆪 🎸𖤐𝄞💿
You were in Eddie’s bedroom getting unready after your dinner date; you hadn’t been feeling the best because of the baby. The nausea had been coming in waves, and Eddie knew you were not feeling the best. Oblivious to what was happening, you told him it was the stress of getting the album done. 
Eddie told you he picked up some ginger tablets because he knew Gravol made you too sleepy. 
“Baby, where are the tablets you bought? My stomach needs to settle,” you asked as you removed your earrings. 
“Uh, check the night stand,” he called over his shoulder, disappearing into the walk-in closet. 
You made your way over to his side of the bed and found nothing but an old copy of Lord of the Rings, a vibrator, and the box of condoms you were supposed to be using; bit too late for that now… 
You then walked to the bedside table on your side of the bed. That made more sense; he would put it on your side for you. 
You opened the drawer, and your heart felt like it stopped.
“What is this?” Your voice cracked.
“What’s what, Sugar?” You could hear the smirk in his voice. 
Your hands trembled as you picked up the small velvet box sitting there wide open for you to see. A diamond ring. It was not just any diamond ring but a pink 4-karat cushion cut with white diamond clusters on the side, staring you in the face. It was beautiful. 
This man could not be serious? This is not how he was proposing to you? 
You felt like you were moving in slow motion as you turned toward Eddie. Tears were threatening to rim your eyes; man, being pregnant really does heighten your hormones. 
Eddie was in the walk-in closet undressing for the evening, and when you didn’t respond to his question, he was confused, so he poked his head out while pulling on his black sweatpants.
To Eddie’s surprise, you held the one thing that had taunted him over the past four years. He had forgotten about it since you came back into his life. How could he be so stupid? Of course, you found it! 
“Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit,” Eddie ran over to you in a panic. He tried to swipe it from you, but you pulled your hand away. 
“Answer me, Eddie, what is this?” 
“A ring,” Eddie answered matter of factly. 
“I know it's a ring, Eddie, don’t play with me right now. What is this?” You tried to keep your voice from cracking again. 
With a deep sigh, Eddie folded an arm over his chest and pinched his brow before letting his head fall back, trying to think of a way to explain. 
“It’s an engagement ring, Princess.” He reached out to your free hand. You let him. “You weren’t supposed to find it.” He sighed. 
“I wasn’t supposed to find the engagement ring left wide open on my side of the bed?” You cocked your head. He had to be joking? So this isn’t how he was proposing? 
“God no, Angel! You think this is how I wanted to propose to you?” He shook his head with disbelief.
“Then why is it sitting in there out in the open for me to find!” You didn’t know what to think; was this even meant for you? Are you jumping to conclusions? “Oh my god, it’s not for me, is it? Fuck I’m so stupid” You shoved the box into Eddie’s hands and ran into the ensuite bathroom. 
“Angel, wait!” Eddie called out to you but your emotions were sighted by one thousand, and you shut the door in his face before he could follow you. 
“Baby, please let me in; I’ll explain everything. Just let me see my pretty girl.” Eddie cooed through the black wooden door. 
You stood there for a moment, unsuccessfully holding back your tears. You didn’t feel pretty, your mascara was running, your stomach was still doing flip-flops, and you looked boated. 
“No,” you refused. 
“Come on now, sweetheart, don’t be like this. I’ll tell you everything.” Eddie watched the doorknob like he was trying to unlock it with his mind. To his surprise, it twisted. You stepped out, walking right past him no less, as you crawled into bed and pulled the duvet over your head. 
Eddie rolled his eyes at your dramatics. You really could be such a brat, but he knew better than to poke the bear right now. 
“Come out from under there, please, so I can talk to you?” Eddie stroked your arm from above the blanket. He didn’t get a worded response, just a muffled grumble. 
“Let me talk to you, pretty girl, don’t act like a child.  Another muffled, grumbled response was made, and he could have sworn you said something about acting however you want because you’re having his child, but it was so muffled he swore that he was just hearing things. 
Eddie tried again, then realized you were not coming up, so he would have to go in. You tried pulling the covers closer to you, but his grip was much stronger than yours. He snuggled in the bed, but you turned to face the other way. 
Eddie could not believe your behaviour right now. 
“Don’t make me take you over my knee, little one,” he seductively whispered in your ear. 
He could not be serious right now? 
“Eddie, don’t,” you huffed. 
“Then quit being a brat and let me talk to you.” he pulled you into him so he was spooning you. 
“You tried to wiggle away, but his strong arm held you in place. You decided to give up and let him talk. The sooner he spoke, the sooner you could escape this stifling heat trap you had created for yourself. 
“What do you want to know?” He kissed your shoulder as one hand trailed lightly up and down the side of your thigh.
“Everything.” You whispered with a light sniffle. 
“Yes, the ring was for you, and no, you were not supposed to find it like that... It's been sitting on that side of the bed for years, taunting me, and I never had the heart to throw it away.” Years? You wanted to cut him off and ask, but you let him continue. “ I had this whole thing planned to put in Italy. You remember?” he cleared his throat. Fuck “Obviously, that didn’t work out like I had hoped. I had forgotten it was there over these past few months because it was no longer a reminder of sad memories. I don’t know why I didn’t move it when we got back together; honestly, I just didn’t think about it. You were never supposed to see it… well, not never…” 
You took a moment to process, then slowly turned around to face Eddie. You placed a hand on his cheek and leaned in to kiss him. You didn’t know what this meant for the both of you now, but the idea of being engaged made you extremely happy. 
“I love you, Eddie.” You whispered as you pulled back. 
“So we are okay?” He nuzzled his nose against yours. 
“Yeah, I think so,” you nod. 
“Good, because I must punish you for being such a brat now.” Eddie threw up the blankets and pulled you over his lap before you knew what was happening.
“NO, we can’t hut the baby!” you shouted, not thinking. 
Eddie’s hand froze mid-air before it could come down on your bottom. 
You covered your mouth, realizing what you had just said as Eddie pulled you back up from his lap.
“What did you just say?” Eddie's eyes were wild while scanning your tummy back up to your face.
“I’m pregnant,” you spilled softly. 
“You’re- you- you’re? A baby?” Eddie pointed to your tummy. 
“This is not how I planned on telling you,” you groaned into your hands before looking up at Eddie, who had the brightest smile on his face. 
“You’re having a baby?” His large hand spread across your lower stomach. You place your hand over his and nod yes. 
“We are having a baby!!” Eddie shot up out of bed and pumped his fists as he ran around the room in excitement. You couldn’t help but laugh; this was the best reaction you could have hoped for. 
“When did you find out?” He ran back over to your side of the bed.
 “Um, not long, about two weeks ago…” 
“Two weeks?! Why didn’t you tell me?” He places a gentle hand over your tummy.
“I was scared… and I was waiting for the gift to come in the mail to help tell you.” You looked down as you started picking at your nails. 
“Scared?” Eddie cupped the side of your face.
“We are so new, and I didn't know if you wanted to be committed to me like that after everything from our past and-”
“No.” Eddie shook his head, cutting you off. “We aren’t doing that; this is the best news I could have ever asked for.” He leaned in to kiss you. “I love you,” another kiss. “I love you,” he moved down to your neck. Kissing you between each sentence. “You’re going to be the best momma… and now I’m going to have to take extra good care of my girl and baby.” Eddie couldn’t hold back his smile. 
Your skin tingled as Eddie made his way down your body with more kisses. You moaned from how his lips brushed so lightly against your skin. Everything had been heightened now that you were pregnant. Every touch, every kiss, every graze was like a bolt of lightning shooting down your body and straight to your clit. 
You moaned his name as he sucked on your neck. His hands gently pushed you up on the pillows resting on the headboard. 
“Have to treat my girl extra special now.” He whispered as he travelled down your body. His strong hands travelled down to the hem of your dress and wasted no time getting you naked. 
“Have to treat this pussy right; it’s going to be giving me the best gift in the world.” He kissed your clit over your panties, and your body jerked. This was the first time you’ve had sex since finding out the news. Your morning sickness had been taking over any time you were with Eddie. You won’t be up for it. 
Your body was so much more reactive, and Eddie noticed. Oh, he was going to have so much fun.
“You like that, Princess?” He stroked his index finger down your clothed slit before hooking a finger under the gusset and pulling them down in one swift motion. 
“Yes,” you panted. 
“Look at that,” Eddie said as he parted your legs. He ran a calloused fingertip through your slick. You grabbed his wrist when he got to your clit. 
“Too much,” you whimpered. It felt like your body was on fire. 
Eddie crawled back up to kiss you; it was soft and tender. His hand trailed up from your centre to your breasts. He cupped one over your bra and massaged gently as you ground your core into his thigh. 
“I can’t wait to worship this body,” Eddie spoke into your mouth. 
You let out a soft moan when Eddie pulled down the cups of your bra and latched his mouth onto your extra-sensitive nipple. Your hips hadn’t stopped moving. Your clit was throbbing as you ground your hips up and down his clothed thigh. Eddie let you use his leg to release the pressure that kept building and building in your lower stomach. The added pleasure of Eddie’s mouth on your peaked bud made your orgasm come faster than ever before. It didn’t take much before you were letting out silent screams. 
“Poor little thing, coming already? Eddie loved this. He was eating it up. 
“Please, please.” You didn’t even know what you were begging for? You were so sensitive, but you needed to feel Eddie or else you would explode. 
“There there little one, Daddy’s got you,” he cooed. 
“Daddy?” You questioned still in your fucked out haze.
Eddie never referred himself to Daddy in bed, only Sir. 
“Yes. Daddy. ‘Nd you’re Mommy.”
Was it weird? Yes. Were you arguing? No. It only turned you on even more. 
“Now stop thinking and let Daddy take care of you.” 
He aligned his hardened shaft with your dripping hole. 
It slipped in without any resistance; you felt every inch, every vein, and especially those glorious silver balls perched at the end of his shaft graze your g spot. 
“Oh my,” you whispered.  
“Aww, look at that little pussy clenching,” he pulled out before spreading you open again and again. 
Eddie wasn’t going at his usual pace; he knew it was silly, but he didn’t want to hurt the baby. He saw that you were so sensitive enough that he didn’t need to. 
He rocked his hips to push in and out of you slowly and methodically. 
“More,” you whimpered, trying to gyrate your hips against his to create more friction!  Eddie pinned your hips down.
“Nuh'uh, don’t fight it.” He threw your legs over his shoulders and leaned in so you folded in half. 
“Please,” you begged. You were so fucked out you just needed to feel every bit of him. 
“My poor little one.” he mocked before reaching his hand down to massage your swollen bud. “Can’t do anything about it, can you?” He was such an ass. 
“Please Eddie, I-I-”
“Oh, I think my cock got you so stupid. It’s not Eddie, baby girl.” He stopped all movement. 
“Daddy, please!” You were on the verge of tears at this point. You were so overstimulated. Every stroke, every brush, every breath was overwhelming you.
“There’s my smart girl.” Eddie bent down to kiss you as his hips thrust into you so deeply that you saw stars. Your body felt like it left and went to another dimension. 
“Keep coming, baby, that’s it.” Eddie didn’t let up. He continued to pound into your cunt until he was spilling himself inside of you. For the first time, Eddie wasn’t worried about him cum filling you up. 
“That’s it. Take it all. You’re my little cum dumpster. Going to fill you get you pregnant all over again.” 
You were too fucked out to realize what he was saying didn’t make any sense. 
You came back down to reality a few minutes later. You were curled up on Eddie’s chest. You could feel the rise and fall of his lungs as the room was filled with heavy pants until Eddie spoke up. 
“I wasn’t too much, was I?” Eddie was worried, worried about hurting you or the baby. You shook your head no in response.
“How did this happen?” Eddie questioned. 
“What? The baby?” You quipped.
“Yeah, I thought it was like impossible to get pregnant with an IUD?” He crunched his face, trying to think. 
Shit.
“I took it out…” you admit. No use lying to him.
“You- you took it out? What? When?” Eddie was shocked.
“I had it taken out over a year ago because I thought it was aiding my depression, you know… hormones and all that.” You bite your lip with anticipation. 
“Baby…” he trailed off. 
“I’m okay now, I swear. I’m doing a lot better,” you promised. 
“You promise to tell me if you ever feel like that again, OK?” 
“Yes, Sir.” You playfully reply. “Oh, that’s how it's going to be?” He raises a brow at you. “I’m trying to have a serious conversation with the mother of my child, and you wanna be a brat?” His fingers started trailing up your sides, tickling your middle. 
“Eddie, stop!” You laugh, but he doesn’t let up. He continues until you’re almost in tears. When he finally gives in, it hits you what he said minutes earlier. You’re the mother of his child. Unborn but still yours nonetheless. 
“I’m going to be a mommy.” You whisper more to yourself than anyone. 
“Yeah, you are.” Eddie’s face lit up like a Christmas tree. 
🎸𖤐𝄞💿𓆩🎧𓆪 🎸𖤐𝄞💿
“You two are so gross,” Violet Rose said as she entered the kitchen the next morning. 
“Huh?” You questioned before taking a bite of the scrambled egg Eddie had made for you
“I don’t ever want to hear your nightly activities ever again." she shuttered.
You felt all the blood drain from your face as you froze from the words she spoke. 
“Oh god, oh god, oh god,” you mumbled under your breath, trying to hide your face in your hands. How mortifying! 
“Mornin’ Cupcake,” Eddie walked back into the kitchen as Violet grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge. 
“So gross,” VR cringed and walked away without another word. 
“Hey! You’re still grounded, don’t forget. I don’t need the snarky comments,” he called after her, clueless about what she might have heard the night prior. 
“Baby, you might have to end her punishment early… she has suffered enough.” You try not to laugh, but it was so uncomfortable you don’t know how to react. 
“What?” Eddie looked back at you. 
“She heard us…last night.” you cringe.
“She knows about the baby?” He tilted his head. 
“No, not the baby,” you chuckle. 
“You mean?” Eddie’s eyes went wide at the realization. No wonder she called him gross. 
“Oh god! No, no, no, shit, shit, shit, shit.” 
“Baby, it will be okay.” You tried to console him. 
“Okay? It’s not okay! Probably scarred her for the rest of her life!” He brushed his hands down his face. “She shouldn’t even know what sex is! She’s a baby, my baby!” Eddie was spiralling. 
“She snuck into a club with a fake ID and was with a man twice her age when I found her... hate to break it to you, but she knows what sex is, babe.” You stroke his back, trying to calm him down. 
“She was with who now?” Eddie's face went beat red. Shit. You’d forgotten you hadn’t disclosed that part of the night you found VR at The Red Bottom's. 
“Shhhh shhhhh, it's okay. She got her punishment; she knows what she did was wrong. We are finally getting somewhere with her; let's not ruin it by reminding her of her mistakes.” You cooed. 
“Yea, yea, you’re right,” He sighed. 
“Poor kid,” you shake your head. 
“When do you want to tell her?” Eddie pulled you in by your oversized t-shirt. 
“You think we should tell her now? She is old enough. I don’t wanna keep any more secrets from her.” You wrap your arms around Eddie’s neck.
“Yeah, I think so too.” Eddie landed his forehead on yours. You were about to kiss when Violet Walked back into the room. 
“Oh god! Get a room!” She covered her eyes like she was in physical pain. 
“Sweetheart, come here. We have to share something important.” Eddie patted the bar stool that was beside him. 
“Do I have to? I could be doing, I don’t know, algebra homework or something.” She rolled her eyes. 
“Come, sit” Eddie used that commanding voice that made your pussy tingle. 
“We have some news. Exciting news.”  Eddie emphasized when he wrapped his arm around your waist. 
“You want to tell her, or should I?” Eddie asked as he looked at you. 
“Um, you can tell her, baby” You smiled. You were very nervous about what her reaction would be. You had just broken the surface of making up with her. 
“You are going to be a big sister.” Eddie smiled brightly. 
A few seconds of silence pass before what Eddie said hits Violet Rose. “Shut up!” Violet’s face emulated her father’s as his mouth parted into a toothy smile. 
Well, that was better than expected…
“You’re having a baby!” She jumped up and embraced you in a hug. Tears of joy rose in your eyes, and you nodded. 
“Yeah,” You whispered. 
“Holy shit!” Violet was ecstatic. Now, this really meant you were here for good! You wouldn’t leave her and her father. She finally felt like things would be okay. 
“So you’re okay with this?” You ask with a quivering lip. God, pregnancy really made you a crybaby. 
“Yes! Omg we have to go shopping! We can get all the baby clothes and, oh, the nursery! We can decorate it; I have so many ideas! I saw one Pinterest the other day that was just the cutest! Oh, and we can do a baby shower! And a gender reveal party! But not those lame ones with the smoke or balloon ones that are horrible for the environment- ” She rambled on. 
“Whoah, slow down Cupcake”  Eddie cut her off. “We just found out, so you can’t tell anyone yet; it’s too early.”
“How far along are you?” She bounced up and down on her toes. 
“Five weeks.” You smile. 
“Oh, I'm so excited. I love you guys.” She hooked her arms around your and Eddie’s necks. 
That was the first time you heard her tell you that since she was eleven. The waterworks were starting up again. You’d finally felt like a family again. 
🎸𖤐𝄞💿𓆩🎧𓆪 🎸𖤐𝄞💿
Eddie, Violet Rose and you had lived in your little bubble for the past two months. Things with VR were so much better; she was opening up to you like she used to and trusting you more than ever. Eddie had also asked you to move in with him. 
Even though you loved your little bungalow, having the four of you living there wasn't practical. Eddie’s had so much more space and was always a home to you in the time you’ve known him. You’d convinced Eddie to start redecorating just a little bit. However, you told him the house needed to be brighter. So after some negotiations (letting Eddie do filthy things to you), you got your way and painted the walls lighter. It made the house look so much more significant. Violet cheered when you told her the dungeon she lived in would be given a facelift. 
Today, Eddie and Violet Rose and you were out furniture shopping. You’d wanted to fix the bedroom to make it yours and Eddie’s rather than just Eddie’s. Eddie was fine with anything as long as you were happy. You’d also come across some cribs and changing tables in the store that you loved and marked down to save for the future. 
After hours of looking, you were starving, so you went to lunch at your favourite spot.
Word was starting to spread that you and Eddie had gotten back together. You both hadn’t officially announced anything, but you had been spotted out in public a few times, and the wind was picking up in the tabloids about the both of you, so you were grateful when the restaurant wasn’t bustling.
“The baby is still hungry,” You wined as the waiter walked away with empty plates.  
“Holy shit!” Violet Rose squealed out of nowhere. 
“What?!” You ask.
“Oh my god, I can't believe that's her!” Violet half whispered. She didn’t get excited about celebrities; she grew up with them, so why was she freaking out about this one? 
You look at Eddie and see all the blood drain from his face. 
“What is it?” You grab his hand. 
“Eddie, is that you?” You heard a sickly, sweet voice approach the table. 
You cannot believe who is standing before you as you look to your right. 
“Sarafina, uh, hi- it’s been a while.” He stuttered as she wrapped herself around your boyfriend.  
“Wait, you two know one another? Dad! why didn’t you tell me?” Violet chastised. 
You watched as Sarafina’s face shot towards her daughters. 
“This must be Violet Rose.” She smiled. God, she was beautiful. 
“You know my name?” Violet’s eyebrows shot up.
“Well yeah, I-” she looked to Eddie, and he subtly shook his head no. “I, uh, know your Dad; we go way back. About sixteen years, if I’m not mistaken.” She clearly was hurt by the fact Violet Rose didn’t know she was her mother. 
You’d cleared your throat to take the attention off Sarafina. 
“Oh, I’m being so rude. Where are my manners?” She spoke. “I’m Sarafina, and you are?” 
“This is my Mom. You can call her Poppy or Angel, whatever works,” Violet Rose spoke up, and you and Eddie both wiped your heads toward her.  She hadn’t ever called you her Mom before? “Uh yea, whatever works? It’s very nice to meet you.” You stuck out your hand as a gesture. She didn’t take it. 
“Mom? You’re young enough to be her sister.” You knew it was a jab but weren’t sinking to that level. 
“Yeah, well, she’s a great one.” Eddie grabbed your hand.
“Well, I uh- don’t want to bother you any longer on your little family day.” She cleared her throat. “It was nice seeing you, Eddie,” She nodded and then lingered on Violet Rose before she walked out of the restaurant.  
“What the hell, dad!” Violet spoke as soon as she saw Sarafina exit the building.
“Violet Rose Winnifred Munson. Don’t.” Eddie never used her full name unless he meant it. So she dropped it… for now. She thought about asking you later when her dad wasn’t around. 
The car ride home was quiet until Violet spoke up. 
“So uh, about lunch… I think Sarafina likes you, Dad.” 
“What?” He jerked the wheel a bit, making you squeak. “Sorry baby, but what are you talking about Cupcake?” He looked at her through the rearview mirror. 
“She was totally all over you!” 
“Is that why you called Angel your mom?” Your eyes went wide with curiosity. 
“Well, yeah, partly.” She shrugged. 
“Partly?” You ask, looking back at her. 
“You’re more of a mom than she ever was to me.” Violet had dug into who his dad had been with around the time she was conceived. She got final confirmation when Sarafina said they’d known each other for sixteen years. It wasn’t rocket science to see the similarities in her face and her birth mother's.
Somehow Eddie managed to keep his cool while driving you safely back home before freaking out. The three of you exited the car, and Eddie walked over to Violet Rose. As you watched him engulf his daughter in a suffocating hug, you couldn’t help but sniffle. Damn you, baby hormones. 
“I want you to know how special you are. You are so brave, smart, loving, and funny, and I’m not just saying that because I’m your Dad, okay?” He kissed the side of her head and pulled away. 
“Thanks, Dad. But can I ask…. Why didn’t you tell me?” She asked as you all walked back into the house. 
“Because Cupcake, I know what it’s like to not be wanted by the people who are supposed to love you the most. And I did not want that for you, ever. Growing up, I couldn’t have you seeing that woman everywhere, knowing she asked not to be a part of your life.” Eddie sighed. 
“I love you, Dad, but I’m still trying to wrap my head around this whole thing. I kinda just wanna call Charlotte and tell her what’s happening.” She made her way to the staircase. 
“I’m just going to ask that you ask her not to say anything. I know she won’t, but Sarafina asked that no one knew… that’s part of why I didn’t tell you, kiddo. But you have every right to talk about it… it’s your life, too.” Eddie sighed. 
“Thanks, Dad.” Violet turned and walked up the stairs. 
“You’re a good Dad.” You turned to hug Eddie once VR was out of sight. 
“It’s so hard sometimes.” He nuzzled his head into your neck. 
“But you have me now; you don’t have to do this alone anymore.” You stroked his head. 
“God, I love you.” He leaned in for a deep kiss.
🎸𖤐𝄞💿𓆩🎧𓆪 🎸𖤐𝄞💿
You told Roger and your team you were pregnant a week ago. You were starting to show and couldn't really hide the bump anymore. It's been over three months, and your doctor said the baby was healthy, so it was okay to start telling people. 
Roger was excited, more than enthusiastic; he had ideas on pregnancy announcements. He insisted on a People Magazine cover to announce your and Eddie’s relationship plus the Baby. You’d let him know you would run it by Eddie, but it seemed like he didn’t have a choice. 
“I don’t know about this Princess,” Eddie snuggled you while laying in bed, getting ready to sleep. 
“Come on baby, it could be good for us, like really good! No more sneaking around. I can finally stop worrying about people finding out, and it will probably up record sales.” You stroked his tattooed-clad chest. 
“I hate photoshoots; they’re so long, and I always get so cranky and hungry-”
“Hangry.” 
“Yea, that… and what about you? I don’t want you on your feet that long.” 
“Who says I’ll be on my feet?” you tease. “I’ll probably be in nothing but a sheet, baby. I’ll have to show my little bump, and you can be there with me while I’m practically naked…. Or I can do the same without you and just make it all about me.” you shrug, knowing that won’t fly. 
“No way in hell I’m letting you be naked in a room with a bunch of men without me.” Eddie huffed. 
“Okay, then it’s settled. You’re doing it.” you kiss his cheek and roll over to turn out the light. You could feel Eddie roll his eyes, and you snuggled back into his chest. 
🎸𖤐𝄞💿𓆩🎧𓆪 🎸𖤐𝄞💿 
The magazine cover came out when you were five months along. Your baby bump was more prominent now than on the shoot day. You could finally show it off without worrying about hiding your tummy anymore. It felt like a weight had been lifted from your shoulders. 
“Can’t believe it's finally public,” you sighed. You were in the living room hanging out with Violet Rose. 
“Me too! Now I can finally tell people I will be a big sister!” She applauded. “You think it will be a boy or girl?” She asked. 
“I don’t know yet. I thought I would have a feeling by now, but honestly, I’m unsure.” You rubbed your tummy. 
“Too bad you guys are waiting; I would have planned the best gender reveal party…”  she sighed.   “Speaking of parties.” Violet Rose hesitated, knowing she couldn’t be trusted with going out after being busted. “Charlotte is having a birthday party tonight, and I was hoping you could help me get ready?” 
“And where is this party being held?” You question. 
“At her house, her parents will be there; it is totally supervised, I swear.” She crossed her heart. 
“And your Dad knows you’re going?” You question. 
“Yes, I already spoke to him. I’m sleeping there, so you don’t have to pick me up either. 
“Of course, I’ll help you get ready,” you smile.
You were sat in Violet’s room in a pile of clothing. She was freaking out about what she should wear. Then, after you figured out her outfit, you would help her with her hair and makeup. 
“Ugh! I'm never going to find anything cute enough!” She cried. 
“This is so cute. Wear this!” You pull a black minidress out of the pile she had thrown at you. 
“I wore that last time!” She wined. 
You looked at the clock; it was only 5:00 pm; thank god you had three hours to help her get ready. 
“Come, let’s look in my closet…” you waved her over to follow you to your room.
After settling on one of your outfits, you returned to her room to do her hair and makeup. 
“So any particular reason you are freaking out?” You laugh while blending her bronzer. 
“I’m not freaking out,” She huffed. 
You give her a knowing look. 
“Okay, fine. My crush will be there, and I wanted to look nice for them…” She sighed. 
“Oh, a crush! Do tell.” You wiggled your brows at her. You were so excited she was finally opening up to you again. 
“uh… well.” Violet hesitated. 
“It’s okay, baby, you can tell me,” you reassured her. 
“It’s Char.” She looked down, avoiding eye contact. 
“Oh?” You were taken aback a little; you didn’t think she would be crushing on her new best friend. 
“I, uh. I like both boys and girls.” She twiddled with her thumb. You could tell hoe nervous she was, but you were so happy she opened up. 
“Can I tell you a secret? You lifted her chin so you could continue doing her face. “I like boys and girls too.” You smiled. Not many people knew about your preferences. However, it felt right to let her know she wouldn’t be judged by you.
“What?” Violet Rose’s eyes brightened. 
You nod your head to confirm. 
“Does Dad know?” She asked. 
“Yeah, I told him when we first started the whole fake dating thing.” You shrugged.
“Cool,” she half whispered. 
“So tell me more.” You smile, reaching for the eyeshadow brush. 
“Well she is really pretty, and smart, and funny, and we get along so well. I feel like she’s my other half.” She sighed. 
“Do you know if she likes girls too?” 
“No” her shoulders sunk. 
“Well, she would be crazy not to like you back if she does.” 
“You think so?” She looked up at you with those chocolate eyes. 
“Now, don’t take this the wrong way because I do not condone what you did at the club, but you pulled that guy, didn’t you? You’re beautiful. Your mom’s a supermodel, and you’re funny, charismatic, and kind.” You tell her. 
“She’s not my mom…” She shook her head. 
“You know what I mean-”
“You are,” she cut you off. 
“Ohhhh, don’t you do this to me now!” You jokingly threaten as you try to hold back the waterworks. 
“Pop, I'm sorry I keep forgetting how the baby makes you emotional.” She giggled. 
You sniffle a bit and pull it together to continue her eye makeup.
“Anyway… I hope I figure out what to do.” She sighs.
“Have you told your dad?” You ask, moving on to her hair. 
“No,” she shakes her head. 
“Okay, I won’t say anything until you're ready to tell him yourself.” You smile at her from your reflection in the mirror. 
“Thanks, Mom,” she said with a slight grin. 
“Okay, you’ll have to give me a minute.” You walked to her night side table to get a tissue while she laughed in her vanity chair. 
*knock knock knock* 
“What’s going on in here?” Eddie walked in to see you crying and Violet Rose laughing. 
“She *sniffle* called *sniffle* me *sniffle* Mom.” The dam broke; you couldn’t help it. You had been overcome with so much love. 
“Oh, Angel, come here.” Eddie wrapped his arms around you. He smiled over your shoulder to VR and waved her over. You felt another pair of arms wrap around your shoulder from behind. 
“God, you Munsons are so mushy,” You spoke into Eddie's chest. Your body shook as the both of them giggled around you.
“Don’t tell anyone we have an image to uphold.” Eddie smiled.
“I don’t think anyone is going to be calling you a bad boy after that magazine cover” VR cackled. 
“You’re on thin ice missy, I can make you stay home.” Eddie threatened. 
“Oh baby you can’t do that! We put in hours of work!” You patted your tear-stained cheeks. 
“Fine, I can’t say no to you.” he kissed the tip of your nose.
“OK, people, I have one hour left. I need my hair finished!” She rushed back to the straightening iron. 
“Okay okay” You laughed. “Let’s get you picture perfect.” 
🎸𖤐𝄞💿𓆩🎧𓆪 🎸𖤐𝄞💿
Eddie had it all planned out for months. He had consulted Violet Rose on proposal ideas. She suggested a pamper day.  He was taking you on a lovely day out, and you were getting a maternity massage, then getting your nails and hair done. Then he would take you shopping if you weren’t too tired before he took you home to cook a nice dinner. After dinner, he would pop the question.
Violet Rose planned a sleepover so you could have the house to yourself. She didn’t want a repeat of the last time she heard about your extracurricular activities. 
When Eddie told you of your plans today, he wasn’t surprised at your shocked reaction. You were seven months pregnant, and he told you it was because you’d been working so hard to finish your album. The release date was pushed back because you felt the songs weren’t working. Eddie told you that the stress wasn’t good for the baby and you needed a day for yourself.
Eddie went with you to every appointment. He also got himself a massage while you had yours. He sat and waited for you while your nails and hair were done without a peep. 
You told him you would go shopping another day; your feet were swollen and still bothering you. You went home and took a nap, and when you woke up, Eddie had placed your favourite slippers by the bed so you didn’t have to step on the cold floor. He also placed your favourite maternity dress out for you next to a note that said to get ready for your date.
You could smell something delicious from the kitchen when you stepped out of the bedroom. As you rounded the corner, you saw a candle-lit dinner ready and plated waiting for you. 
“Baby, what’s this?” You ask, seeing Edie put the final touches on the table.  Eddie turned and smiled. Fuck he looked so good tonight. Eddie was also dressed up. He wore the same black silk shit he wore the first time the two of you met, paired with a nice pair of black dress pants and a classic understated black belt. 
“Morning, sleepyhead,” Eddie greeted you with a kiss.
“You try growing a person and see how tired you get,” You giggle, walking towards your chair. 
Eddie steps over to pull it out for you. Forever your gentleman. 
“Thank you, baby. What's all this?” You asked as he scooted you in. 
“Can’t a man take care of his perfect, beautiful woman?” He smirks. 
“What did you do?” You ask. He is being suspicious. 
“Now, why would I have had to do something to treat the woman I love?” He raises his brow to you. 
“Don’t know? I feel like you’re doing so much for me today; I’m surprised.” You take a sip of the water he poured you. 
“Well, the night is still young, cheers.” Eddie held up his glass. 
Eddie pulled you out to the yard for fresh air after your meal. The backyard was decked out in what seemed to be hundreds of twinkle lights. There was a gazebo in the back by the pond that you liked to read in. He led you towards it and saw it covered in plush blankets and pillows. 
“Eddie, what’s all this?” You whispered in amazement. Eddie had a team come in and set everything up while the two of you were running your errands.
“Come,” he held your hand as he helped you up the steps. 
“Angel…” Eddie took a deep breath.
“Yes?” You looked up at him, and he swore your eyes twinkled. 
“I have loved you from the moment you flirted with me at your show. I never knew someone could make me feel this way, and honestly, I didn’t believe in love because I had never found it until I met you. I never want to lose you again.  You are the light of my life, my everything. You own my soul. I never have and never will stop loving you.” He knelt down on one knee. 
Your hand flew up to your mouth when he pulled out the ring you found a few months ago.
“Will you spend the rest of forever with me?” 
Your hands shook as he pulled the ring out of the box and slid it up your finger. 
“See, it was always meant for you. I just got it a little too early,” he smirked. 
You crouch over as much as you can with your belly and pull him in for a deep kiss.
“So, is that a yes?” Eddie pulled away.  
“You’re sure you want this baby? You want me forever? Us forever?” You cupped your lower stomach. 
“Of course, baby, I’ve wanted you forever.” he cupped your face with both hands. 
“So?” 
“Yes, Eddie, I’ll marry you,” you smile. 
Eddie let out a breath he hadn’t realized he was holding. 
“You sure you wanna be stuck with me forever?” Eddie chuckled. 
“Yes” you cupped your hands over his. 
“Good, because I’m never letting you go ever again.” 
~end~
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