#the one we had when i was a kid was awful but this one doesnt even make any noise

[cosmicredcadet]

I'm sorry but lmk not being clear on what MK knows about monkey king is sooo frustrating. He's some how his biggest fan who knows so much until the story requires him to have never known anything and it's like... why did you set him up as a monkey king fan it then just decide "actually he doesn't know shit" bro grew up to adulthood hearing stories and somehow knows Jack shit about the guy he supposedly fanboys over.

[theparadoxmachine]

I want to serenade it and marry it and grant it a knighthood for services to my realm and make it an heir to my kingdom omg my crops are at last literally watered and I can breathe through my nose

[connormoving]

like a teacher liferally claimed lampstie. you know them. at age 9. like 4th grade. shoved the teacher to the ground in the busline and stomped on their head repeatedly while laughing. 1. no witnesses. in the bus line at pickup time. 2. the teacher was uninjured 3. they were 9 years old ? and not s super villain?

[impish-baby]

More dad survivor x zombie reader + an old friend :) (tw: dead animal, guns, emetophobia, threats of harm)

"Aw, sugar.." The dead bird is the farthest thing from appetizing but you look so darn happy offering it to him, how's he supposed to say no?

"You're the sweetest, daddy will eat it later, ok?" That at least seems to be satisfactory enough for now, as you drop the poor thing down onto the park table.

The playground has long been abandoned, left in disarray since the apocalypse hit, that doesnt stop Hank from finding it absolutely adorable when you try to climb up a slide. Nearly gives him a heart attack though.

"Baby, come on, you're gonna hurt yourself." He wonders if you remember being little and playing here, your memory isn't the best when it comes to some things but you sure seem to recall what it takes to give him gray hairs. "I know you think it's fun, but your old man really couldn't handle it if you got scratched up while you're messing around."

You get hurt so easily now a days, he's basically toddler proofed the house all over again and yet you still find a way to bang yourself up when he's not around, that's why he's taken to tying you up when he can't keep an eye on you.

When you do finally decide to slide back down, Hank immediately sweeps you up into his arms with a soft chuckle. "Alright, alright, I think you've had enough outside time for today, we should be headin' home."

It would've been a good day, a great one even, if he didn't catch the glittering of a silver barrel from the corner of his eye.

"Shit-" Hank has never been more greatful that he was holding you, because you lunge automatically for the stranger and likewise closer to the gun. "No, sweetheart, shhh..shh..calm down.." God, he'd love it if you listened, it's hard to pull out his own pistol while trying to wrangle you into staying put.

Other survivors aren't very common in town, most people left after the first few months.

"You gonna let that thing go so I can shoot it?" He recognizes that voice, and it makes Hank's heart sink into a pit in his stomach. "I ain't.. Hank?" A familiar face is rare, a friendly familiar face is nearly unheard of.

"Don't shoot, don't shoot, just step back for a minute, alright?" When Hank glances over, he wasn't expecting Bo to be emptying his stomach onto the cement.

"I- Fuck-" The man retches again, dryheaving. "You.. God, the kid.." An honorary uncle, Bo knew you since the day you where born, he didn't see the day that was meant to be your last.

"I know," You stopped struggling once you heard his voice, eyes wide as you simply whine to be let down. "You're gonna have to wait, be patient, hun." That never was your strong suit. "The grown ups need to talk."

"Hank.. man, you gotta let them go.." There's tears in Bo's eyes as he takes a cautious step forward. "They're dead. There aren't any ifs or buts, that's a corpse. You can't-"

"That is my child," He's been a sinner for a long time, if it comes down to it, shooting his brother will be one of his worst. "My baby, what kind of father am I to hurt them?"

"A merciful one!" There are days you wake up confused and scared, you cry for hours or at least your body tries to. "They aren't a person anymore, Hank, they aren't themselves. You're fucking lucky they haven't bitten you yet!"

"I'd welcome it if they did." He's thought about it, that first night when you went cold in his arms and many more after that. "You pull that trigger and that's it, a life without my kid isn't worth living."

"Dammit," Hank almost collapses in relief as the gun is holstered, putting his away as well. "You're still an idiot, huh? Figures.."

Bo approaches slowly, never taking his eyes off your still form. All you do is smile and try to reach out for a hug, but he cringes away with a look of disgust.

Hank's heart breaks as you tuck your teary face against his neck. He doesn't know how to explain in a way you'd still understand, all he can is press a kiss to your forehead and shush your sniffles.

[halitis]

do i have anything anything against jason as a character? no. i actually like him quite a bit! i think hes really interesting!

BUT DO I THINK SOME JASON FANS ARE FUCKING DUMB AS FUCK?!?? YES BITCH WHAT THE FUCK?

im gonna go through all the shit wrong with this comment thread one by one because jesus fucking CHRIST!!!!

1. "that thing" first of all. What. she is literally just a evil-aligned poc woman. she has been raised in this environment and as a result of that this is really the only life available for her and thats the tragedy of her character!

2. "why did she get with roy" THEY ARE FUCKING SOULMATES. THEIR ENTIRE THING IS THE INHERENT LOVE THEY SHARE FOR EACH OTHER WHILE ALSO VALUING THEIR MORALS ABOVE EACH OTHER. IT IS THE COMPLEXITY OF RAISING A CHILD TOGETHER AND ALSO TRYING TO FIND MIDDLE GROUND. IT IS BEGGINT THE OTHER TO CHANGE AND KNOWING THEY WONT.

3. "MY BABY JASON" YOU CANNOT SAY THAT AFTER YOU JUST INSULTED JADE.... LITTERALLY CANNOT. the biggest fucking hypocrytical statement i have ever fucking heard!!! bro!!! jason is Nawt a good person! he just flat out isnt! he has done so much horrid shit, not just to his familt, but to roy's family too. like he is not ur sweet innocent traumatised boy, he is a fucked up grown ass man who was hurt and decided to take that pain out on others. he is no fucking different from jade except he thinks hes doing rhe right thing, at least jade knows she isnt

4. "lian baby mama is jason now" ive talked abt this before, but sexism in fandom spaces when it comes to mlm ships is so fucking common it is fucking absurd. why are women only used as babymakers for ur gay characters?? why can they not be complex characters while men can???? it is fucking absurd how common it is in dc fandom and i frankly dont know why im shocked by it! women are regressed to one of three roles: evil villain who abused male love interest, baby maker, BAMF with no complexity or character at all and it is honestly so fucking tiring and just, boring to read??? like how do you not just hate it??????

5. "unemployed" honestly. i have no words. all im saying is it is No Fucking Shock that the woc is being pushed into these awful stereotypes.

now we are up to the worst part. the final comment...

6. "how are you gonna sleep with my man" ROY LEFT JADE. NOT THE OTHER WAY ROUND. roy was on an undercover mission and fell in love with jade and got her pregnant! he left because he would not be able to arrest her!!! all she fucking knew was one of the first people she truly ever loved had fucking gotten her to trust him and then left her, she had to deal with that pregnancy BY HERSELF. SHE LITTERALLY SAYS SHE SPENT THE ENTIRE PREGNANCY WAITING FOR ROY TO COME BACK TO HER, AND SHE WASNT EVEN MAD SHE STILL LOVED HIM.... she didn't even realise his identity for years!

also why is it always the woman's fucking fault if she gets pregnant? it takes two to tango! roy is as equally responsible for that pregnancy as jade is!

7. "AND THEN LEAVE YOUR KID" OH MY GOD.... [EXPLODES YOU WITH MY MIND] JADE. CANNOT. LEAVE. THE LEAGUE. BUT SHE DOES NOT WANT TO RAISE A FUCKINF CHILD THERE BECAUSE SHE KNOWS WHAT ITS LIKE!! SHES BEEN THAT KID!! jade knows fucking better then to delude herself into thinking she can raise lian safely while still stuck in her life, but lian is her number one priority always!! forever!! she pushes roy and lian away because she knows she is dangerous for them and because she thinks she doesnt deserve to have them and that love in her life!!!

8. "lian should be embarrassed to have her as her mum" i actually fucking wish nothing but hell upon you. have you not fucking read. just a single thing in ur life actually? just like actually can you read??? because i have met TODDLERS with better media literacy than you. LIAN HAS ISSUES WITH HER MOTHER. THIS WAS A BIG PART OF HER STINT AS SHOES. SHE IS DEALING WITH THE COMPLEXITIES OF LOVING HER MOTHER, THE WOMAN WHO LOVES HER AND CARES FOR HER, WHILE ALSO ACKNOWLEDGING THE FACT THAT SHE ISNT A GREAT MUM.

im sorry this is so messy and has so much shouting it actually has me fuming when people r so fucking stupid, idc if you dont like a character but dont just ignore all the bits of a characyer that make them redeemable or interesting to prop up ur male blorbos????

[ilylovelyz]

kenma fatherly headcannons

i thought it would be interesting to think about what kenma would be like as a father 🤔

look, im not even gonna be nice with it, i definitely dont see kenma being excited at the idea of having a kid 😭

definitely was like "are you being fr 😟?" when you told him

he obviously wasnt an asshole about it, but he couldn't help his feeling and indifference about the whole thing

the two of you had a long talk about it

the whole time he was more or less "are you sure about this"

hes not a horrible person/partner, he wasnt about to force you to do an abortion

he just wanted to make sure this was actually what you wanted to do and if you were actually serious about it

after you were stern about keeping the baby, he was fine with it

he was more worried about how he would be like as a father because he's very much scared of little kids and struggles to bond with just anyone

also a little peeved at the thought of his alone/free time being taken away

doesnt like the idea of his alone time with you having a literal permanent third wheeler but wont admit that to anyone but kuroo 🌚

during ur pregnancy, he was actually really okay with it

he would check up on you various times of the day, asking how you feel

yeah, he wasnt really excited for it, but that doesn't mean he wont try for it

would pause his games and go to wherever part of the house you were in, eyeing your baby bump with those wary cat eyes of his, all "..how are you feeling..?"

tbh i see you getting pregnant before marrying him because the two of you were kinda lazy with being careful 😅

he kinda facepalms because now hes like "why didnt i think of the possibility of pregnancy🤦🏽‍♀️"

while it doesn't speed up the whole process, he'll now begin taking the thought of marriage seriously

he'll bring up the idea of eloping, or a small wedding because he doesn't like the idea of a big and elaborate wedding ceremony/party

he didnt really care about gender, but he did care about baby names because he didnt want the baby to have a stupid name

now i see him being very curious tho

so he'll ask you a bunch of questions about how it feels to be pregnant, eyes wide when you tell him all the gruesome parts 😭

will also spend some time looking up more information about pregnancy and childbirth

now i do think he'd be aware about how he should change himself for the better

he grew up kinda isolated, and he 100% didnt want that for his kid, especially considering the fact that his child will most likely be an only child too

aw sleeping in kenma's arms while he plays video games cuz hormones made you sad

he'll like announce ur pregnancy to his followers/fans, it was so random he was like "yeah guys im having a kid 😪 kinda scary ngl" during one of his livestreams

really appreciates and is totally surprised when he's gifted money and baby supplies by his fans

maybe posts short little clips of you sleeping in an odd position or doing random things because he thinks its funny how you now do things differently because your bump prevents you from doing things in a certain way

i think it would interest him in the way your baby bump grows

he would be a little mortified at the way he would poke your bump's skin and watch his indent stay there long after he pulled his finger away

would be kinda "??? 🤔🤨" when he first feels the baby's kick/movements

he would "begrudgingly" walk to the store for you late at night if you were craving something

acts all annoyed but lets bffr kenma we know ur a softie 🤣

okay for the birth tho he's so mortified

definitely doesnt want to watch but obviously will be there for you because he knows better

the whole time he feels secondhand discomfort for you and feels your cries in his deep in his core cuz ur in pain and he doesn't like that 😕

this might sound weird, but i see him bringing his portable gaming system to the hospital so you can play with him and get ur mind off things

not saying his feeling towards the baby will change after the birth, but he'll definitely be like "oh wow 😳" when the baby is first born

have u ever seen that clip of steve irwin first looking at bindi when shes born and hes all amazed and awestruck by her?

its like that but its less noticeable and its more like "this is my child?"

a little scared to hold the baby at first because he's afraid to drop her

but once he does he'll look down at it and be like "ur not so bad afterall 😪"

DEFINITELY doesn't get any sleep during the first few months because he'll for some reason take late night feedings/crying upon himself

hes all "ur such a pain bro 😒" while rocking the baby back and forth to soothe it, all cuddly and gentle with it

tbh i cant decide whether it be a girl or boy so its up to reader to decide

omg hes mortified after the first belch spit hes gone afterwards

literally condemns the baby to hell

hates changing diapers but does it for the sake of the baby's comfort and health

when he's alone with the baby, he'd be like "ur kinda ugly 🤔" while playing around with it

tbh i see him getting random bouts of urges to play with the baby and speaking to it in a baby voice secretly

gets really embarrassed if hes caught and acts like it never happened

when ur not there to watch the baby while he's gaming he'll actually be okay with the baby sitting in his lap while he games

if he wins he'll be all "lets goooo 😝" all up in the babies face 😭 lifting it up into the air and just being such a gamer dad

also starts teaching the baby how to play games real early on, making them hold a controller or something and teaching them game logistics

the baby is like 5 months old and doesn't know about taxes but knows about dnd 🤣🤦🏽‍♀️

i see him like announcing the birth of his kid to his followers/fans a couple weeks after the birth

only shows what the baby looks like when its like 6 months old and crawling all in the background, he'll turn around and be like "wanna see my baby?", lift up the baby and put it's face all up close into the camera 😭

does 0.5 and only 0.5 photos on the thing 😅

does a couple more streams afterwards when he "games" with the baby and blame loosing on the poor thing 😅

aw i can see him and the baby having matching outfits when he goes out with it

he's not the best dad, but he'll try his hardest

on a sweet note, if kenma feels lonely when ur away, he'll allow the baby to sleep in the bed he shares with you as a "substitution" and cuddle with it

yk that tiktok audio that goes "leave me alone baby 😒" and then goes "ur my baby i love you ☹️☹️🥰😘" yeah that hes that

[curly-fry-3]

I don't know if you write for wlw themes since all your posts are wlm, so if you don't just ignore this, I'll understand.

So I wanted to request daughter-reader after having a bf for maybe a year breaking up cause she released 'holy shit I'm a lesbo' and they like broke up on good turns like he sure he was a bit sad but understanding and they both stayed friends. So now she somehow has to tell Dean, like she knows Dean probably wouldn't be mad at her but still she's a nervous wreck, and he liked her, now, ex bf much and almost treated him like family (You can continue from here if you write for wlw themes like I said already (*ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ*.ﾟ)

𖦹Home of Sexual𖦹

summary𖦹 Dean realizes he hasn't seen you hang around your boyfriend in a while and needs you to explain the sudden shift on your behavior

pairing𖦹 Dean Winchester x Daughter!Reader

word count𖦹 1,276

notes𖦹 this request took me a while be cause IT IS AMAZING and needed to be handled with love and care

It had been a year. A year of dating your now ex boyfriend. You loved him, of course you loved him, but something just always felt off. You didn't understand why girls loved kissing their boyfriends or why other girls had a hard time staying celibate. You had always felt like something was wrong with you, that maybe you were broken. It took some self reflection–and a little exploration on the internet–for you to realise the truth. You're a raging lesbian. 

If you had come to this realization under any other circumstances it would have been no big deal, it’s the 21st century #pride or whatever. But this wasn't any regular coming out. You had a boyfriend you had to break up with. A boyfriend that your dad really liked. Your dad, Dean friggin Winchester, had gotten over the fact that his baby girl was dating a boy and had started treating the kid like family. So of course, when you broke up with him, you did not tell Dean–you didnt wanna break his heart. You also maybe we're sort of kinda nervous to tell your dad the reason things ended, it's always hard coming out. 

Your ex and you had split on good terms. Sure he was sad about it but he understood–it's not like you didn't want him you just didn't want boys (the problem really was you not him). But just because you two didn't hate each other doesnt mean you were best friends. Dean had noticed that he wasn't coming around as much. At first he didnt wanna ask about it; maybe you two were in a rough patch, you just needed to sort stuff out. But after a month of not seeing the kid he got curious (he missed him), He decided it was time to ask you what happened.

You were in your room one day after school. Dean noticed you doing that a lot lately, locking yourself away. He walked in and found you sitting on your bed scrolling on your phone. Working up the courage to start the conversation, he started picking up trinkets on your dresser and looking at them before setting them back down. Noticing your dads odd behavior, you cleared your throat and got his attention. He put down the toy in his hand and turned to you, leaning his body on the dresser and folding his arms over his chest. You put your phone down and sat up higher in your bed, “do you need something”

Dean rubs his hand over his face and stands up straighter “um kid you know you can tell me anything right”

You give him a questioning look “uh yeah, what is this about”

“Its just…I haven't seen your boyfriend in a while…you can tell me if there's trouble in paradise”

You freeze up a bit “oh…that”

He notices your change in behavior and his face hardens in confusion and worry “Are you two ok?”

You avoid eye contact and answer “well, yes…actually no, we um…broke up”

His gaze softens and he steps closer to the bed to comfort you. He reaches out and rubs soothing circles on your shoulders.“Aw sweetheart, I'm so sorry, you wanna talk about it? What happened?” You awkwardly shrug and look up at him “It was mutual”

He scenes your reluctance to give a clear answer and stops his soothing motions “Did he do something”

“N- No, no. He didn't do anything it just wasn't gonna work out” You stumble out

Dean immediately relaxes but doesn't stop his questioning “There has to be more than that, you guys were together for like a year”

“Im sorry dad, I know you liked him” You respond, looking down at your lap

He rolls his eyes and crosses his arms over his chest again “Sure I liked him but I like you a hell of a lot more. Sweetheart, you sure you're ok? You can talk to me–tell me why.”

You look up at him anxiously “No judgement?”

“Do you seriously have to ask that, of course no judgment” he reassures

“ok…We broke up not because of any fight or anything…I just um…realized that it wouldn't work out because…I like girls”

“Oh?” Dean looks down at the floor for a second in contemplation then looks back at you “Oh!” His jaw is slack as he thinks about how to respond

You look around your room awkwardly “yeah”

He regains his composure “ok…cant say its too shocking but I still didn't expect it”

You focus back on him “Wait what”

He shrugs and continues “I mean, I know you only liked watching that live action scooby-doo cause of velma in the latex, can't blame you”

Your eyebrows scrunch in confusion and your voice raises “You knew!”

He puts his hands up in defence “I thought it could be maybe a phase or maybe you wanted to be her…maybe you swung both ways. I just never thought you would only like girls…You only like girls, right?”

“Um yeah pretty much” You respond 

He rocks back and forth on the balls of his feet while processing what you said “so you're a lesbian?”

You nod “Yeah…wait you're like totally chill with this”

He looks at you with slight disbelief “Of course, why wouldn't I be?”

“I mean I didn't think you would be anti but I thought you'd have more of a reaction” You answer

“I like girls, you like girls, so what” He says, nonchalantly 

“I mean, I guess you're right” You agree

His expression turns serious and he lowers his head to catch your gaze“I'm glad you felt like you could tell me…cause you can tell me anything you know”

You look up at him “I know”

He relaxes a little and unfolds his arms, placing one hand on your shoulder “Good”

You stay like that for a second before dean interrupts the silence “Are you and him like done. Like is he never gonna come over”

You try to hold back your smile “yeah im pretty sure he doesnt wanna see me again”

Dean sheepishly asks “yeah, but do you think he would want to see me”

You chuckle slightly “are you serious”

He pulls his arm back and puts his hands in the air, exasperated. “He was a good kid. I'm not gonna apologize for liking him” He put his hands in his front pockets then mutters under his breath “at least he would want to watch football with me”

“Hey!” You interject “I heard that. Football is boring”

Dean makes a disgusted face “Football is the backbone of american culture, you would know that if you would watch a game with me”

You shrug “i'm ok with not knowing”

He looks down at his feet and sighs knowing that he isn't gonna win this one. As he looks back up at you, he gives you a warm smile “you ok…sure you two broke up for a good reason but you still cared about him”

You nod “i'll be ok”

“Good…now that that's over, you have to hang out with me again, I feel like you're always in your room.” He says

After Dean pulls you out of your bed you spend the rest of the night eating junk food and watching TV. He knew the breakup was still hard for you so he didn't even try to make you watch sports with him. Halfway through the movie you picked, you had fallen asleep on his shoulder. Maybe you were a little different now, but that doesn't mean things have to change. You're still Dean's baby girl and he’ll love you just the same.

sorry if there are any typos and I hope you love it

@areswasneverhere

[pellowinksx]

MOTIVATION FROM 🧷🧷🧷🧷🧷🧷🧷SAFETYPIN ANON🧷🧷🧷🧷 BC WE ALL NEED IT UTS TUESDAY AM I RIGHT

So yesterday was the worst. absolute worst. so tired of everythitn so much hatred. cried. anxious. couldnt focus on a damn thing. got more meds. drove well. etc. but didnt feel good at all. guys. trust if you ever feel in despair its not real. I was so tired and even then things changed. my friend only wears her emerald necklace. she wore a flower necklace instead? I zoned out listening to lana del rey in math trying to do void (ive been just popping up in there since I was a kid but it was out of desperation ykyk I was like no everything's bad I need to lock in!) and suddenly my math teacher was trying to get my attention even though he never rlly cares because I get good grades yk? then suddenly we did an all-class activity. at first I was gonna just revise that it ever happened but then I was like ykw no why is the world crazy. then today the boy that in my opinion. why can't he be a girl hes cute but im GAY. anyways. idk it all looked weird he looked different and I woke up smiling today even though yesterday I was crying and sooo sleepy. also before bed I realized I just had a headache all day and wasn't even tired... so it was all fine. ALSO make sure when you have bad days to remember it doesnt manifest because you dont persist in that. it doesnt matter if you feel like shit you wont attract shit ykyk. today feels fine I feel much better my bangs looked ass this morning but i feel better AND I took a video for my friends with my outfit and my friend just said 🧷 ur so beautiful like ur actually gorgeous WEEE! I feel better today guys a bad day only means you're one step closer to getting there trust me nothing can stop you, ever ever ever. its all fake and the world is an opp. trust yourself. anyways yap over i keep having dreams i forget. but they're not rlly awful. think I dreamed my SP again I drew her yesterday and then first thing when I wake up my friend posted a reel of Joan Jett to her story who I do in fact find cute. idc idc its real my hair is 24in and someone cute goes here. HOLY YAP. idk im an oversharer anywaysss. its like if I dont tell anyone I just think its not even real. ALSO im making a background video collage type shit for my choirs performance on Thursday and my teacher LOVES IT and I was nervous so I emailed her instead of going in person but she had me show ut to her on my phone and she loved it so much I have to get it done today/tomorrow ugh but im so excited its going rlly well. ALSO probably its bc I practiced too, I drive myself home every day but ive gotten significantly better at driving (I was an anxious wreck before). but also I started taking my iron pills again so. I think. that might be why things sucked for a while. guys. take your iron pills. they're not making your life suck I took like 4 yesterday (dont do that but I hadn't in months. guys dont mishandled your meds i do dumb stuff but you shouldn't ok???) now I feel blessed or whatever. so you know what. yeah. take iron. also try to absorb yourself in activities if you can only react to the world around you. thats why works for me AND I get to say I did things! I also love to say i already did it automomously without thinking (manifested) and that being upset only makes it happen more. bc lord knows I am an upset little child at times. anyways I feel much better will take iron and MAKE SURE YOU DO TOO! if u need it. I promise promise promise if some rando like me can change her whole face at the age of 12 you can get a text back, $5, whatever. dont hype a single thing up in ur head its all just THINGS in the world, even Carl Sagan says. everything in the universe is a "moat of dust, suspended in a sunbeam." now when I was un medicated I found that distressing but nothing is too much or too little you assign meaning so dont let anything assign it for you trust me it feels so good to be in control and you really are. yesterday I was crashing out and all that means is I have it today and yesterday and every day. trust

🧷

I love this so much I wish we were friends irl so I could just listen to you yap

lmfao, anyways. this is honestly amazing and a couple of points caught my eye, 1 when you were talking about smth abt bad days and then know it gets better. There was this girl who manifested her dream life on twitter, and she said a very interesting quote to me "if your life is falling apart right after you affirm and persist, I have some news for you" That really piqued my interest because its SO TRUE LIKE I feel like that's the biggest sign you could ever get but we turn it into a negative

2 girl have fun with it and turn him into a girl LMFAO you could just assume he was born a girl, whats he gonna do abt it (I mean- she 😂)

3. I LOVE THIS FOR YOU like you had a bad day yet you still persisted no matter what and stayed faithful and loyal like AGHHH girlie ily

you're so right, you really ARE in control so why stress about it?

[inkandarsenic]

911 8x15 Lab Rats reactions, as written out in my notes as I had them SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT

ugh. the bitch. I really hate Moira guys

She just HAD a Stanley cup full of ice???

Oh. She took roz’s tumbler and bag. RUDE

“It could be hours” THANK YOU ROZ. NOT HELPFUL

THE FUCKING FBI???? Oh they’re not gonna do shit either. God why is the government so fucking USELESS

Athena stopping Buck with a word. THATS HIS MOMMA

“You know how you get when things get personal” Bobby has Athena CLOCKED

Athena and Buck Shenanigans time!! mother and son breaking the law together

Who is Williams again? I forget

maddieeeee. my girl has been through so much

HEN YOU ANGEL.

Not Bobby deciding to play chemist. Oh I love my little macgyvering team

“You’re a man waiting in the car” aw Buck was so excited to go undercover

Athena baby you are not the best actress. But it worked so go you I guess

“You stole the crime scene photos.” “They can make more.” I love them

CHEMISTRY CLASS 118 I love this so much ngl

RAVI???

RAVI????

“I transferred custody” girl you stole them

THEYRE RUNNING OHR OF AIR???

Bobby. Bobby. Bobby please don’t take off your mask

ok seriously what is Moira’s obsession with stealing roz’s shit

moiras like an ARSONIST. this is so criminal minds coded

girl. the super strain YOU FUCKING CRWATED???

“No one has that.” “They’re about to” oh I hate you

FOR THE BABY. I FORGOR THEYRE HAVING A GUCKKNG BABY AND HES DYING

please I can’t do a 118 heart to heart right nowwww

Buck wouldn’t leave Maddie alone either Chim

THEYRE THE BEST TJING HES EVER DOEN FUCK THIS SHOW I AM CRYING

STOPPPP

BOBBY FACETIMED MADDIE SO SHE COULD TALK TO CHIM????

CHIM?!

What is HAPPENING???

THW BLOOD IS JUST A FUCKING. FLOW??? FROM HIS NOSE????

TOU CAN BLEED OUT THROUGH TOUR NOSE???

HIS NOSE CAPILLARIES ARE DISSOLVING???? THATS A THING????

“I swear I thought the pastries were for everyone” you fucking BITCH

girl you were not slick

up? Buck. Buck what is your plan

DID HE CALL FUCKING TOMMY

he did.

You know what points to Tommy for this. I still don’t like him but he’s really coming in clutch here

HEN. DONT MESS WITH THE TUBE KEEPING YOU ALIVE

oh thank god for hen.

ok now how is Athena gonna get the cure into the lab??

Buck. Can we not do this right now.

Oh yeah I forgot Tommy is technically friends with chimney

Oh fuck off army man

hey. hey Tommy? hey please don’t risk lives here

I hate the fucking army. Why are they so intent on letting Chim die

wait. wait Athena isn’t even there is she??

YESSSSS

KAREN COMING IN CLUTCH

I love roz and Allen they are my favorite scientists here

Ok so they got the cure!!!

Athena getting arrested. smh

There are still twelve minutes so it’s just them having cute slice of life right??

“Athena! You’re under arrest too?” Lol. Try to sound less excited Buck.

No warrant? Cmon fbi tighten up. Or don’t. We still hate you

girl you are insane is what you are

well. Glad this nightmare is over

ROZ AND ALLENS LITTLW FIST BUMP AS CRAZY MOIRA GETS ARRESTED PLS I LOVE THEM

“You guys would not believe the day I had” Buck says as he walks into the lab where all four of his team spent the day nearly dying. I love him

hey where’s Bobby

CHIM ADOPTED THE RAT???? “I thought Jee yun could use a pet”

Bobby. Bobby. What??

BOBBY. WHAT THE FUCK

NO

NO YOU ARE FUCKJNG WITH ME

BOBBY????

“You’re gonna be okay Buck.” STOP IT RIGHT NOW.

I LOVE YOU KID????

I LOVE YOU KID?????????

SOMEBODY FUCKING SEDATE ME I CANT DO THIS

I LOVE YOU KID?????? BOBBY.

HES WALKING AWAY SO BUCK DOESNT HAVE TO WATVH HIM DIE????

PLEASE WE WERE SO CLOSE

PLEASE. TIM DONT DO THIS TO ME

BOBBY.

HE WANTS SOME TIME ALONE WITH HIS WIFE I’M GONNA. I HATE THIS

HE DOESNT WANNA GOOOOO

SEASON ONE BOBBY JUST WANTED TO DJW BUT SEASON EUGHT BOBBY WANTS TO LIVEEE FUCK

HE STARTED TO LIVE AGAIN WHEN ATHENA SAID YES TO DINNER????

And then I was crying too hard to keep typing through the end

[thesauce8]

rewatched the baby sealing scene and it got me worked up again so rant incoming

minato deadass looked at his newborn son, his own flesh and blood, made out of his semen, and decided to lay all their problems on him during his first day alive

“the masked man who attacked will bring catastrophe to the world” THEN WHY ARE YOU KILLING YOURSELF?? DONT YOU WANNA DEAL WITH THAT SHIT YOURSELF? i still dont understand why he didnt just seal half of kurama in kushina and half in naruto if he felt he just HAD to have the kyuubi as a weapon. that way naruto at least isnt alone and minato can look after him.

“the one who will stop him is this child.” HAVE YOU NOT LEARNED YOUR LESSON? after rin and obito youd think hed learn that putting children in danger and giving them such huge responsibilities is the WRONG choice. especially a BABY

“this infant. he will open up the future as a jinchuriki.” HES AN INFANT AND YOURE ALREADY RELYING ON HIS POTENTIAL VALUE AS A FUTURE WEAPON

“i know it. somehow im sure of it.” youre leaving this child to this fate on a hunch. thats literally it.

“lets believe in him” uhh how about we take care of him first “after all this child is our son” yeah thats kinda why you should stick around

“but hes our son, minato, which is exactly why i dont want him to bear such a heavy burden” now kushina actually gets what this parenting stuff is all about

“id rather you stay with him and watch over him” “why does naruto have to be sacrificed for the balance of power among tailed beasts, for his nation, his village?” good to know that kushina doesnt have the shinobi system sickness. make this woman hokage already.

“to forsake ones nation and ones village is exactly the same as forsaking ones own child.” if youre gonna think this way then dont have a mf kid. your child needs to take first priority because youre the one who decided to bring him into this world.

“im not doing this just for you. im doing it for naruto.” hell no you are not

“i will die for my son” but you wont live for him? “its my duty as his father” its a fathers duty to protect his son and if that means death then so be it but thats not what protecting naruto means here . he didnt need minato to die for him

really this is less anger with minato and more with kishimoto because it feels like the narrative wants you to agree with him. thats what had me so bugged because i dont really mind as much when characters do wrong things when youre supposed to disagree with their actions but here it seems like kishimoto really doesnt understand how awful hes making minato sound.

smiling, kushina says she lost the argument and naruto is very happy to hear that minato did it because he believes in him and that solves the conflict of naruto calling minato out. and the weird way the narrative handled genocide and the unresolved systematic conflicts really support this because hed clearly jump at the chance to push through any pro konoha bs.

[danvillecheese]

the dwampyverse and all its timelines

welcome to the analysis i've been promising for like two years! this will be phineas and ferb centric simply due to the sheer amount of episodes compared to milo murphy's law and hamster and gretel. with the inclusion of hamster and gretel, i will admit this has gotten a little less easy to navigate, but i'm hoping with a bit of analysis and suspension of belief, it'll be okay. ready? lets go!

the best way i can describe this first part is by providing a visual of how i see it. and using a three-circle venn diagram makes perfect sense with all of the overlapping and individual parts.

so - pictured above is said venn diagram. each part is its own timeline. ones where each show is their own timeline, ones where pnf/mml overlap, mml/hng overlap, pnf/hng overlaps and the one right in the centre where they all overlap. this doesnt include timelines where "endings" are separate (read: quantum boogaloo, act your age, doof 101, owca files... any ending that isnt last day of summer. but i'll get to those ones later). make sense?

1. where only phineas and ferb exists.

this works best before 2015. this timeline is the one that has zero murphy crumbs on it. dan and swampy haven’t yet had the idea of doing a show about a kid with awful luck and time travelling shenanigans. this is the most nostalgic timeline, for phineas has reigned over the disney channel cartoons for eight years. the lumberzacks dont exist, hamster and gretel dont save danville each week. pnf is its own show. no other shows have an influence on it.

adding to this - if you ignore any of the alternate timeline episodes and stop at last day of summer, you get my personal favourite way of watching the show. this one is basically just ignoring owca files, doof 101, all of mml and most importantly - act your age. I love the idea of an open book ending for these characters, especially for ones we saw on our tvs for over eight years [when it aired]. the events that take place after last day of summer are simply giving an idea of what COULD happen to our beloved cast, and without them, they really make no impact on the original story. the events before the end of summer are in no way impacted by the other alternate ending episodes.

2. where both phineas and ferb and milo murphy’s law exists

this is the canon, everything-exists-all-at-the-same-time timeline, pre-hamster and gretel. every piece of context works together, and everything is all connected. everything is canon! everyone is friends with each other! the pnf effect works! doof moves in with the murphy's, and this timeline is basically if you watched pnf and mml chronologically, without any of the alt ending episodes (in case you forgot which ones: quantum boogaloo, act your age, doof 101 and the owca files). this is the one i think we're all familiar with - it also includes candace against the universe (mostly uh... broadly speaking, the lumberzacks are the only mml thing in there).

3. where only milo murphy’s law exists

a timeline where pnf and hng are nonexistent. this timeline would probably exclude anything past season one, really. the crossover would not work. maybe even in this timeline the pistachions take over everything and the human characters cease to exist. (eleanor shellstrop this is the bad place!.jpeg) this further pushes the point (that I haven’t made - I’ve been thinking it I just haven’t said it lmao) that you can’t have milo murphys law without phineas and ferb. the crossover plot proves it. both in the real world AND in mml.

4. where just hamster and gretel exists

this one is a little hard to explain, especially since hng has only just finished its first season. there are a few pnf references in this show but it stands on its own feet much more than mml did. i think the likelihood of hng existing in its own timeline works a lot better than mml - but the chance of there being a surprise crossover is moderately high. like i said, it's a little hard to analyse this since its that much more removed from its predecessors.

5. where milo murphy’s law and hamster and gretel exist

this is a very unlikely scenario, but there is a chance a timeline like this exists somewhere. it’s a bit difficult to analyse or even prove since there haven’t been any kind of references or even characters that pop up in hng from mml. I wouldn’t expect the opposite either, considering that mml ended in 2019 and hng didn’t exist until after that, so hng within mml is basically impossible without a third season.

these last two timelines make a lot less sense, especially since hng still has stories to tell and we havent seen mml characters there yet (well... unless you count doof. hes technically a mml character, right? as much as some of us dislike that fact? haha. ahahaha.)

6. where phineas and ferb and hamster and gretel exists

this one works. i think it’s basically how dtva thinks it works (basically completely ignoring mml’s entire existence lmao) but this is basically the canon timeline of hng currently. but we’ll wait and see if there’s a crossover.

7. where all of phineas and ferb, milo murphy’s law and hamster and gretel exist all at once

like I say, a surprise crossover could happen (but based off what happened with the pnf effect I can’t even imagine how messy this would get) so yes, they could exist all at once. and they probably do, just that hng is a lot further removed from its predecessors in terms of references and characters popping up out of nowhere (doof and his inators don’t seem to have much importance yet, but who knows how it’ll end). this timeline, basically, is for those who don’t really mind that everything’s in a collective universe, and it seems like the easiest one to comprehend if you aren’t pedantic about all of this.

but what about the episodes where timelines end?

you’re probably here thinking okay, so what? there’s different timelines. this isn’t news. what about the other individual episodes that are within the umbrella timeline? I like to think of them as individual timelines within the show, along with all the other ones mentioned above.

quantum boogaloo

timelines have been a thing pretty much since season 2 of phineas and ferb, notably in the episode quantum boogaloo where they go forward in time and see a potential future where stacy is the president of uruguay. this is an example of something ‘canonically’ happening after last day of summer, 20 years in the future. this episode has a couple of potential timelines - the one where everything is fine, and the one where doof is emperor and everyone is named joe. the first timeline has candace ending up with jeremy and having three kids, along with ferb at camp david and phineas at an awards ceremony in switzerland. however, this particular timeline doesnt match up equally with act your age, since their ages dont line up. in quantum boogaloo, pnf are aged 30 twenty years later, in aya, pnf are aged 18 ten years later. this means they could either be 8 or 10 in the original summer, depending on the timeline. the second one is pretty much null to me since they time travel back and both of the future timelines cancel out.

doof 101

so. this is an episode i havent seen for a while. however, this is one of the perfect examples since the theme for doof 101 says "and this all takes place in fall so don't let the timeline throw you" like hiiii thank you for acknowledging that this is a separate timeline! there's a short bit in the title that shows doof facing either prison time or teaching at the high school in court, and its something we don't see the events leading up to. sure, he's done crimes against humanity but there weren't ever any consequences during the show. who turned him in? why is he on trial? what happened between him being evil and becoming a high school science teacher? and why does this monobrow edward rooney ass guy have beef with him and charlene out of nowhere? timelines, dude. got me stressed out and its not even my show.

act your age

[through gritted teeth] this episode also shows another potential canonical ending for the cast. phineas ends up with isabella 10 years after last day of summer, showing that this particular timeline has the kids aged around 8 or 9 in the original summer. we all know my thoughts on this particular ending, notably posted here. this timeline is easy to ignore if you dislike it, like the majority of us.

what does line up with the original summer, however, is doof's b-plot in act your age. I'm not a huge hater of his arc in this episode, and honestly, it might be his most in-character timeline ending out of all of them. yes, you heard me, theres something i dont dislike about act your age. like i said in the post linked above, i dont find it hard to believe he would bowl with perry and carl and monogram every week. he would totally have a mid-life crisis that wasn't real, like this guy canonically can't even hate christmas. this is so in character for him! in terms of it being a different timeline though, the only proof i have is that it's one of many different timeline ending episodes.

last day of summer

this episode is kinda like a flagship for the timelines, and as mentioned above, my favourite ending. i don’t think I need to reiterate it, but it really just provides an open ending for the entire cast, and makes room for anything else to happen. I’m curious to see how it pans out in the reboot; if they keep the continuity and acknowledge that ldos happened, or if they just kinda skip over it if it’s true that the new seasons will happen in the summer after the original one. but don’t worry - if the reboot adds any kind of canon divergence (I’m literally counting on it) You Will Certainly Hear From Me About It. lol

the owca files

I'll admit i haven't watched owca files for a number of years but i still remember bits of it. its a very strange timeline to me. i understand that doof is legally an ocelot and can be an agent but it does feel like the beginning of that out-of-characterness he displays in mml. and i guess the owca files is canon there, right? the bit with monogram during the pnf effect?

this also includes the pine tree. it feels like a way of letting us know owca files is in a different timeline. the flynn-fletcher house gets blown up, they get new plates, and we have symbolism of the end of an era with a pine tree in their backyard.

milo murphy's law

this one in particular is mostly just the pnf/mml overlap but ensures that doof ends up as professor time. if you've seen mml i don't think i need to explain it - after last day of summer (and owca files if ur nasty) the events of mml occur chronologically as if its one continuous timeline.

wait! what about the other canon divergent episodes?

ones that aren’t necessarily an ending but are set smack bang in the middle of the show with no explanation? don’t worry. I got you.

phineas and ferb christmas vacation

this episode features doof being evil in the middle of winter. dan povenmire has said he relapsed, but this is a perfect example of different timelines. a lot of the “ending” episodes were written and aired well before last day of summer so the chance of them knowing how the show was going to end was likely very little, if not zero. so, let’s imagine that last day of summer doesn’t happen. none of that arc happens, it’s just doof being passively evil throughout the year and then this christmas event happens. i don’t think he ever stopped being evil in this timeline. the chance of him just getting less… violent with his schemes is probably the best way of thinking about it. hell, he got perry a present. yes, it was a vase, but would the s1 heinz have done that? probably not. he’s definitely less evil as the show progresses, and even an episode like this one that aired in season 2 shows how quickly they turned it around.

on the other hand - the boys make their santa clubhouse invention and candace stresses what to get jeremy as a gift. does she try and bust them? surprisingly, no. her main focus is jeremy, and when it all goes south she’s in on what the boys are doing when santas elves show up. she mentions “what’s different this year than last year?”, insinuating that the boys weren’t inventing anything before the summer that the show is set in, and that this episode is definitely set after that summer. the B plot is definitely more solid proof of the alternate timeline, with heinz “relapsing” although I struggle to believe that with all the canon divergency that happens within the show and in mml/hng the chances of it just being a relapse are very remote.

that’s the spirit!

this one is similar in that it diverges from our last day of summer ending. doof is still evil, and candace - wait, she doesn’t even try and bust them. she’s keen to trick or treat with the gang and then go to jeremy’s party. she doesn’t even try and bust them. (man, it’s almost like it’s another timeline or something.)

back to doof though - he might have relapsed like in the christmas vacation episode, but he’s not necessarily evil here either. sure, he declared war on grass for an unknown reason and turned himself into a were-cow, but it’s not established that he wants to take over the tri state area like usual. if anything, it’s the opposite. he runs from the masses like it’s a witch hunt.

the curse of candace

this episode is all fine until the end where candace turns to dust and phineas says "we're gonna need a dustpan and some glue." there isnt much else to say about this one, but it indicates another timeline where candace is glued back together afterwards. and she’s also a vampire.

happy new year!

this is set after the summer the show is set in, considering that jeremy and coltrane are at the party as candace and stacy's respective dates. doof is still evil as his plot is to become ruler of the tri-state area. candace makes one last attempt at busting her brothers. this is definitely another timeline, and also apparently one where gangnam style exists. pretty easy to understand - doof doesnt have his giving-up-evil arc and continues to be passively evil like always. this could also work chronologically with christmas vacation, where he tries his naughty-inator and then a week later comes up with the resolution-changer-inator. candace's arc is a little different, she could have stayed consistent and tried to bust the boys from summer onwards, only getting to new years and wanting to change her ways with a new years resolution.

for your ice only

evil doof is back again in the fourteen days of winter vacation that fall between christmas and new years'. for him, this could be an evil scheme that takes place at some point in between christmas vacation and new years, or it could be its own timeline altogether. candace also attempts to bust the boys again, as per usual.

what's interesting about this one though, is the fact they refer back to football x7 when talking about hockey z9. and you're probably thinking 'obviously? whats ur point' and yes. obviously they bring up the original episode when referencing the sport with the same name format. but this also implies its in the same timeline as the football x7 game, meaning there's at least two timelines that divert off my fair goalie - one that doesn't include hockey z9 and one that does (this episode). and this one (i'm circling back) includes evil doof. bam!

escape from phineas tower

what! this is a normal episode, right? if that was your reaction upon reading that subtitle, you'd be thinking the same as me, until you remember the ending where the tower extends its forcefield around the entire milky way galaxy. but here's where things get really interesting. what film, may i ask, has a plot where the ensemble cast has to fly to another planet to rescue two other ensemble cast members? thats right, candace against universe! this means that catu is set in a timeline that doesn't include the escape from phineas tower episode, since they're able to exit the milky way galaxy and enter the vroblok cluster. this would be impossible if it were in the same timeline as this episode, since they would have stopped at the dome and wouldn't have been able to get to feebla-oot.

she’s the mayor

honourable mention to this episode since it features time travel and timeline fuckery and I never see anybody talk about it!

"Back at the golf course, Roger is astounded at how fast the game is going as Dr. Doofenshmirtz points out that the slight chance that the Accelerate-inator could destroy the very fabric of space-time and possibly the entire universe is a small price to pay to get done with the game. Perry then breaks the Accelerate-inator using a golf club, causing time to flow backwards at the exact moment when Linda and Candace are about to bust Phineas and Ferb, also undoing all of the day's events back to the announcement in City Hall and causing an alien from another universe to appear.

At City Hall, Mayor Doofenshmirtz prepares to announce the winner of the Mayor-For-A-Day Essay Contest. The alien destroys the Accelerate-inator, causing the time-line to be altered once again as the new honorary mayor is announced: the old coot and telling everyone that any gold that they find is now his, causing Candace to lament, "I was robbed."" (from the pnf wiki)

what would’ve happened if doof's machine wasn’t destroyed and set the timeline back into place? the fabric of time and space would have been destroyed, and there is a very high chance there would have been a last-day-of-summer-esque situation where everything within the void would cease to exist. right from the start of the episode, it begins with a clock chiming, so from the beginning we are made aware that time will somehow have significance, which it does. after the timeline resets, we hear the clock chime again, which lets the viewer know we're now in a different timeline. there don't seem to be any repercussions of this timeline fuckery later in the show since it doesn't get mentioned again.

night of the living pharmacists

second honourable mention goes to this ending that @momphineasandferbmadeablog reminded me of (tysm bestie) where it "ends" with stacy turning off her tv as if the entire episode was a horror film the whole time. however, even before verifying, i had a feeling it was debunked and its just the ending of the grievance film. and i was right.

"Dan Povenmire made it clear that the entire episode was canon instead of a film Stacy was watching, and that the "The End" card on Stacy's TV was merely the "The End" title card of the Grievance movie she was watching." (from the pnf wiki)

there isnt a citation for it and none of his tweets showed up while i was looking for actual proof but i definitely remember him saying it somewhere, but please, absolutely feel free to think of it as a separate timeline! without dan saying it's a canon episode, there isn't actually any proof within the episode that it isn't its own timeline.

across the second dimension/tales from the resistance: back to the second dimension

and for our third and final honourable mention, this one is basically the existence of the second dimension. I haven't added it as its own since the concept is pretty obvious - its another dimension where a different timeline occurs. i mean, idk if i need to fully explain it, if youve seen the film and the s4 episode you know what happens. it's explicitly stated to be another dimension, however the specific mention of timelines is nonexistent. semantics, yes, but i do really feel like atsd is separate from all of it.

it's certainly a timeline that could happen - doof could lose his choo-choo and eventually take over the tri-state area and the events of the film would occur, but the fact that the main characters cross over and meet each other puts it into a different category for me. but by all means, feel free to think of it as yet another timeline!

I want to specifically mention: this list of episodes is not at all an exhaustive number of timelines. the way I see it, this is just the ones that are “labelled” (for lack of a better word) as their own timelines. there can be as many or as few timelines within the dwampyverse as you like. this analysis is not a rulebook, but rather answering the conundrum with one solution out of an infinite number of possibilities.

the dwampyverse and its "current year syndrome"

i think we can all agree that phineas and ferb is a relatively timeless show, in that you could watch it at any point in the past fifteen years and it wouldn't feel particularly out of place. that being said, the technology used in the show makes it feel aged or weirdly out of time. most notably, the switch between candace having a flip phone in the first three seasons and a touch-screen phone in everything post-season four. this is clearly influenced by the smartphone boom that occurred in the 2010s when iphones became mainstream, and thus impacted everyday life, including in tv and film.

so, when the animators jumped on this trend, phineas and ferb became a lot less timeless. candace owning something like a flip phone, something that didn't even exist for a long period of time in real life, felt less like something that was trying to keep up with the times than when she suddenly appeared on screen with a smartphone. not to mention the alexa joke in candace against the universe. now that was a jumpscare.

if you did want to carbon date the summer that the show is set in, like this post did for example, and if you're like me, you might headcanon phineas and ferb's summer taking place somewhere between 2009 and 2012. the other times where they've crossed over is set whenever it makes sense. the pnf effect? i think its pretty much canon that it takes place in 2017, what with all the pop culture references like pokemon go, dabbing, and uptown funk. definitely things you can date back to that mid 2010s era.

milo murphy's law also makes sure it stays current too, like specifically mentioning the year 2016 when the lumberzacks formed, milo's bag of toothbrushes labeled 2012-2014, and king pistachion doing a selfie with everyone which is like the most 2016 thing ever. (you guys remember the oscars selfie?) there's certainly some purpose behind dating some of the events within the show, since its entire B-plot is about time travel, but it doesn't feel like its really trying to be a current show. at least, not until they have references and allusions to pop culture things like ducky mo-go.

hamster and gretel has what is unfortunately the worst display of the three - there's a lot of social media references in the show. not necessarily memes, but just a lot of display of the characters using social media. the first one that comes to mind is the destructress, where her typical Thing is her doing a livestream or some kind of story update announcement with her phone, clearly showing that this is a 2020s cartoon, and it feels the need to be very current. hell, eight year old gretel has an iphone in this show, but i won't go down the track of why that fact alone is so weird to me since it'll derail this entire analysis.

granted there are a LOT of inconsistencies throughout these three shows but the current year syndrome, although sometimes unavoidable, proves the fact there are multiple timelines - and they can be traced back to candace's flip phone.

so, what do we do with this?

I personally love cherry-picking the parts of canon that exist, purely from a selfish point of view but also because this universe allows for it. there are a lot of different endings or alternate paths these characters can go down, and as exemplified by act your age, we can either ignore them or embrace them. sure, it’s unlikely but there are some people who like the aya ending and say it’s their own canon, and others who like the ending where doof becomes professor time. or there's others, like me, who absolutely adore last day of summer as their timeline end. the openness of it in such a positive light makes it feel like it’s not even the ending for these characters.

it also begs the question - does everything go back to the status quo at the end of every phineas and ferb episode? well... it can't, really. most character arcs within the show are tied to events that happen, like monty and vanessa getting together, or buford joining the backyard gang, or even doof's slow arc to being a good, if not morally grey character.

no, it’s not a big deal that there’s a lot of different timelines in the sense you have to constantly think about it as you watch it. but it does present us with the classic conundrum: which one is actually canon? and to this, i say, pick your own ending. if you like cherry picking as much as I do, indulge yourself. skip episodes you don't like. ignore parts of canon that don't actually have that much impact on the timeline. hey, its not like the show doesn't allow for it!

[baranthedude]

I ranked every WordGirl Villain from Least Evil to Most Evil:

Now when i make list like this, i usally only have 3 categories, but i decided to add a 4th one, and that category is

Plain Old Mischef Makers:

Guy Rich - Guy Rich is the best, richest, and most colossal evil businessman...except he's 𝘯𝘰𝘵, he's just some guy who wants to be cool so he pretends to be this super cool villain with his brother, the only reason he's even on this list is cause TV Tropes counted him as a villain.

Timmy Tim-Bo - The stoner character without being a stoner, ok so all he does is sleep alot, he tried to rob the musiem, but that ended with a bust, and i don't even remember if he did anything evil after that, how is Amazing Rope Guy the worst villain when this guys around?.

Raul Demiglasse - He's just a jerk that likes to make people cry on live TV.

Glen Furlbalm - Dr. Two Brains' biggest and stupidest fanboy, he tries to be as cool as Two Brains, but he just ends up sucking, as both a replacement, and someone trying to get revenge.

Nocan the Contrarian - Nocan is interesting, as he does do damage, like when he became the mayor, but he doesnt seem to be malicous, he just likes not doing what he's told.

Amazing Rope Guy - I'm shocked he got this high, like i knew he wasint gonna be last, but this is very high for someone who's supposidly the least succsesful villain in the city, anyways yeah he attempts to rob people but sucks at it, atleast he's consistent?.

Big Left Hand Guy and Invisi-Bill - The gay couple, they also suck at robbing people, but they succeeded once atleast i guess.

Barely Evil:

Energy Monster - Maria just wants energy, like toasters and stuff, which doing so causes chaos, so like not good, but also not intentional.

The Butcher - Butcher is acutally kinda very sympathetic, he's one of the nicest villains, and his dad, is like awful, he's still a thief, but a tragic thief, speaking of villains with daddy issues.

Victoria Best - Yeah she's the same as The Butcher, a villain with a abusive dad that let's their anger out by being evil, but this time Victoria's a bitch.

Ms. Question - Ms. Question is just your standard thief with cool powers, her powers arent even that damaging, they just make you forget for like a minuite or two, oh and her relationship with Brent is cute.

Lady Redundant Woman - Not much to say as she's also kinda just a standard thief i guess, she's more abrasive? i don't know.

Royal Dandy - Not the child being ranked worse then their mum, anyways the Royal Dandy is very annoying, and framed WordGirl or something i don't know, can we get to the cool villains now?

Eileen the Birthday Girl - Yeah, she's umm, a whiny girl, that likes to destroy, but isint like, inheritly bad?, eh.

Neutral Evil:

Granny May - Granny May does some adcanced theivery, she also framed WordGirl, and also captured her, there is a reason that shes the announcer of the Association of Villains.

Captain Tangent - I forgot why i put him this high.

Steve McClean - I was tempted to put him above Two Brains, but that would be stupid, anyways this guy straight stole an elephant among other things, he also has the voice of a pedophile.

Seymour Orlando Smooth - I originally had him in Plain Old Mischef Makers, but then i realised that what he did in "Fortune Crookie" was kind of creating a cult, so i put him up here, he also kidnapped Beau Handsome.

Kid Potato - The Butcher's dead-beat dad, everyone dislikes him, he just sucks, yada yada.

Leslie - Mr. Big's assistant, she helps him in his evil plans, no matter how 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘱𝘪𝘥 they are, but she never really does anything on her own except in "Leslie Makes It Big", and only cause Mr. Big thought she couldint, NOT cause she's malicous herself, NOT Francis Mallmann.

Tobey - Tobey McCallister III, 𝘸𝘩𝘰'𝘴 𝘢 𝘤𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘨𝘦𝘦𝘻𝘦𝘳, 𝘵𝘳𝘺𝘯𝘢 𝘱𝘢𝘺 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘢 𝘝𝘪𝘴𝘢, ‘𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘴𝘪𝘻𝘻𝘭𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘱𝘦𝘱-𝘱𝘦𝘱-𝘱𝘦𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘪 𝘱𝘪𝘻𝘻𝘢! i think im going insane, anyways Tobey's whole deal is that he makes robits and has a crush on WordGirl, his crush on WordGirl is nice, except in "Go Gadget Go", that was fucked, something else that is fucked is the possible amount of people he killed with his robits.

The Coach - Bro litteraly runs a school about teaching villains how to be evil, also in the episode "The Robot Problem" he proves he sucks more then Tobey when he steals one of his robits.

Chuck the Evil Sandwich Making Guy - You may be thinking to yoursef "how can Chuck be so high? he's suck a cutie" and yeah, he is, but still has a giant crusher that he uses frequently, and straight up tried to turn the town into a sandwhich in "Chuck with a Sidekick of Brent", his niceness is why he isint any lower.

Rhyme and Reason - The final villains of the series, their only this high cause Rhyme nearly destroyed the city out of sadness and anger, other then that they are just thieves.

"Pure Evil":

Hal Hardbargain - Yes, i'm shocked he's this high too, but he litteraly sells villains weapons, and unlike The Coach, he's succsesful, there is a good argument to be made that he sold some villains their stuff, as he is shown to have useful weapons, he only helps WordGirl cause he wants to swindle more people.

The Learnerer - He's canonicallyly a murdererer, by that i mean he destroyeded the Royal Dandy just to learn art's parts, otherer then that he's just a thief, but that one kill gives him a very high boost, he's also voiced by Weird Al, who has a history of cuttinging people's arms and legs off with a chainsaw and bittinging people in the jugularar vein.

The Whammer - His whole character trait is destroying stuff, he once tried to wham every single city in the world, yeah he's an idiot, but a evil idiot.

🥉Dr. Two-Brains - The main villain arguably, he has attempted to turn the town into cheese multiple times, almost caused the cheeseteroid to wipe out half of Fair City, Nearly condemed time to stop forever all so his cheese doesn't expire, and teamed up with Mr. Big, he's still tragic and helpful to WordGirl at times, but there is a reason he's number 1 in the city, but not on this list.

🥈Mr. Big - Why does Mr. Big have a differant vibe then all the other villains, anyways Mr. Big likes to mind control people, mostly for petty reasons, like in "WordGirl Makes a Mistake" where he mind controlled the entire fucking world just to get his casserole dish back, also in "Invasion of the Bunny Lovers" he tried to mind control the world with Two Brains for fun, and to get swish cheese from acutal Swish... people.

🥇Miss Power - Was there any doubt? she has taken over multiple planets, bullies multiple villains, threw multiple people in jail, tried to kill Two Brains, and was probably gonna kill everyone else, possibly even commiting fucking genocide on humans, and again this isint the first time, she's done this before, and maybe still does (i like to headcanon that her humliation on Earth weakend her greatly and now is harder for her to take over planets), oh and she bullied Exposition Guy aswell, TV Tropes litteraly describes her as a "murderous intergalactic dictator"...𝘪 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘱 𝘗𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘮𝘢 𝘙𝘰𝘱𝘦.

Yeah...i probably put Hal too high.

[cotton-could]

In defense of Zenitsu Agatsuma

Alright, we all know Zenitsu is quite a divisive character but his haters are taking their dislike towards him in a disturbingly disproportionate way to the point they pick his flaws and demonize... And their reasons to hate him is either "he's loud and annoying", "he's cowardly and useless", "he's a pervert" or "he forced himself on nezuko" so i'll refute those repetitive arguments because it's getting really tiring

"He's loud and annoying"

He's loud and? So is Inosuke and people dont give him hell for it and many of his lines is him screaming. Rengoku is loud aswell but people dont mind it. They only focus on Zenitsu and it's just unfair and biased because those same people are the same ones who love other louder characters while hating on Zen for it and the excuse it's probably "he's annoying". While the annoyingness depends a lot of the person, they somehow tolerate characters that are way more annoying than him but since Zenitsu is considered as a "loser", they just use him as a scapegoat.

And about being annoying... It's really frustrating that they only tolerate him when he's asleep aka being brave and imo its boring because we have so many characters that fear nothing and are super brave wich gets too repetitive and even boring so to it's quite refreshing to see a character that doesnt show a brave side and has more realistic reactions when encountering demons that are twice his height.

Besides the guy clearly has a lot of issues and unresolved traumas wich are shown with his clinglyness, self esteem issues, etc... sadly the author didnt put much focus and it doesnt go away magic and the fact that his haters are quick to be sympathetic to other Demon Slayer characters who did WAY worse than him but people refuse to try to understand him just show they just care about if a character is cool enough or quiet enough.

"He's cowardly and useless"

Did we watch the same show?? He may be cowardly sure (wich is valid given his circumstances) but calling him useless is a reach. If he was useless; Nezuko would've been killed by Inosuke, the kid he was protecting in the demon drum arc would've died aswell (he had countless of oportunities to ditch the little boy and leave him for dead), the mission in the red light district could've been more complicated, the little girl he defended from Daki wouldnt have her other ear, etc...

Hence, despite being a coward, he still has morals that his haters love to overlook. The guy was terrified of Tengen yet he still did what he could to defend the girls from him, took a nasty blow from Daki just for defending someone, tried to hide Genya from Sanemi, etc without expecting something back. Despite his flaws, Zenitsu is without a doubt one of the most selfless characters in the show but of course, according to dudebros and haters, crybaby=useless.

"He's a pervert"

This one is a valid criticism but sadly, his haters flanderize said flaw to make him some sort of predator, calling him all sort of awful things and even accusing him of stuff he didnt even do. His love for girls can be super weird and he's not a gentleman but they love to overlook all the moments where he genuinely protected girls that aren't only Nezuko and after doing so, he doesn't expect them to be his girlfriend or anything. He even demanded Daki to apologize to the little girl she bullied. If he only cared about women for lust pleasure then many of his kind actions toward them wouldn't even exist in the first place

Besides I find it super hypocritical for people to give Zenitsu hell for his innapropriate behaviour towards girls yet those same people turn a blind eye to Tengen slapping a minor's butt (some even going as far as trying to explain the reason), threw a little girl off the roof without caring if she'd survive or not and almost kidnapping the butterfly girls. Tengen did ALL of this without even apologizing to the girls nor without getting properly punished for said actions (and no, him losing his hand and eye are not direct punishment of his actions but rather unfortunate consequences of the battle). It's just crazy how those same people hold Zenitsu (a teenager) more accountable for his behaviour than Tengen (grown adult) for his smh.

"He forced himself on Nezuko"

Dude has an innocent crush on a girl who treats him well and people act as if he was a terrible and psychopathic guy who didn't cared about her and treated her like garbage. This man would rather suffer than hurt her and see her unhappy, he loves her in a genuine and pure way that goes being "she's cute" and it was shown in his dream. In the light novel, it was confirmed that he doesn't even care that she's a demon, meaning that he loves her regardeless of what she is.

Wich makes all the dumb tweets about Aoi being Nezuko's protector and that someone has to protect her from him. Seriously?? The same guy who saved her twice?? And that scene of him seeing Nezuko in the sunlight is not that serious ffs, he wasnt even too harsh with his movements (he gently held her hands), he was just reaction in a dramatic way and Nezuko wasn't even uncomfortable this whole time. If she were uncomfortable, shown signs that she dislikes him and avoids him then yes, the whole "protect her from Zenitsu" tweets would make sense but nop, it's just a cringey scene that people took it way too seriously. Before you mention me the chasing scene, that was an anime-only scene and in the manga he just bows down to her as he gives her flowers. Nezuko even sees him in a positive light, example:

Anyways that was my rant on Zenitsu, might do more about it in the future

[pumpkinsy0]

Ok dude, hear me out. Steve’s dad is a very traditional man. Anything not masculine enough or traditional enough isn’t good enough. Steve’s not allowed to have hair grease so he has to hide it or his dad throws it away, and if he catches him leaving the house with it in he usually either makes him rinse it out or just beats the tar out of him (let’s face it, it’s the 60s, not just Johnny’s parents are gonna be abusive since it was super normalized in society to beat your kids. Johnny’s was probably more focused on since he was pony’s best friend and he didn’t really like Steve much nor did he talk about him much.) so he usually only leaves when he knows his dad isn’t gonna see him or just sneaks out of his window. He used to force Steve to keep his hair short but he just stopped cutting it after a while since he liked his hair long like the other greasers. His dad forces the family to go take family pictures usually, well it’s not much of a family since it’s just him and Steve but still. Whenever they do that Steve’s dad doesn’t let him put grease in his hair and has him put on the nicest clothes he has. both guys have one suit each, they're old but they work fine. He might be a bad dad but he still loves his kid so every time he makes him go to get a photos taken (which is usually whenever he had enough money saved up on the side to do it) he gives Steve a few bucks. Any thoughts?

-😻

i love when ppl send me their ideas n r like “any thoughts🤔🤔” right after, like u wanna hear MY commentary??? aw yea,,,

ANYWAYS

LOVE THE IDEA, i think ppl tend to forget that being abusive isnt just like doing what johnnys parents were doing, a LOT of the parenting styles in the 60s was just generally toxic

i dont think steves father was rlly talked about a lot but what i do maybe remember is that he would kick steve out????and that he was an alcoholic??? idk i forgor, but point is i think him being this traditional man is a very interesting take on him!! i love when ppl try to characterize these mfs parents bc we know so little about them but we have an idea of the trauma theyve left on their kids, so maybe they acted out like that bc their parents also went through something and they never rlly got help for it considering its the 60s n all, its just this cycle of abuse, the abused becomes the abuser type of thing, even if its unknowingly

hope i phrased that right n u get what i mean

BUT ANYWHO

anon im loving this idea of urs, i WILL be gobbling this up

to add on, maybe steve doesnt rlly talk about his dad so much especially to the gang in general is bc he feels like others have it way worse than him, like yea, his dad kicks him out, but at the same time his dad at least acknowledges him, feeds him, gives him money, that kinda thing, his dad still somewhat cares for him so he feels like he cant rlly say much about the bad things his dad DOES do, maybe only soda rlly knows

[ofcowardiceandkings]

companion piece of young Link

AAHH i finally finished something :'D

i've uh had some very specific Thoughts about Zelda's childhood for a while now so its about time i put them to paper - this is actually round TWO since the original doodles are lost to ... somewhere ... i like these second editions better though so alls well that ends well

we're looking at ages around 4, 7 and 10 years old here touchin bugs in the dirt, archery practice, and playing a lyre ;w;

more detailed Thoughts under the cut 💙

iiitssss customary ranting about my BotW/TotK opinions tiiiimeeee welcome my darlingsss jfkdjfkd 💙

i had a much more solid idea about where i was going with Zelda than with Link but some of it is kinda abstract or weird lol

we know a fair amount about her upbringing in general, or can infer as much from Zelda's interactions with her father and what they and people around them wrote. she was clearly a smart and vivacious kid with a strong personality from the start, no matter how much you sort of squash that shit for the public face, repression etc. so yknow, her mother's death when she was 6, awful. her father's change in attitude especially in her teens, awful. being under public scrutiny her whole life, awful. restrictive structure of royal life, dull (i bet it bored Zelda to death at times no matter how strongly duty-oriented she is). having said that though, she got by and just by looking at her study, she clearly got stuff done to herself - you can take the kid away from the science but the science stays with the kid !!!

additionally, forgive me for mentioning ... timelines ... but in my humble onion, BotW/TotK serve as a Dragon-Break scenario which are SO far in the future from other entries that ALL timelines will inevitably converge and lead to that point, so it doesnt matter any more (i dont like extended Timeline theory, Nindooty doesnt like extended Timeline theory, the current writing team seem to want shot of it, let me be). being a history guy i also subscribe to leaning on the LEGEND aspect of 100 and 1000 year games of telephone, it makes things spicy. tradition is a strange thing, we do things we dont have much of a context for anymore, we're still living with the cultural hangovers of people living when mammoths were around and no thats not hyperbole lol its WILD. ive typed around the point enough lets get going

she was a bugs girl !!!! she still IS a bugs girl lmao but if our 16 year old girlie is gonna pounce on frogs apropos of nothing, that 4 year old girlie is gonna go catch bugs in the Royal Gardens and freak out her maids or escorts with them, good for her 💅

the other two are where my timeline thing comes in; the triforce is never mentioned by name, its just there in symbolism ?? something about the blood of the goddess ?? divine sealing powers ??? no one knows in the same vein, i like to think that its traditional for Hylian Princesses to learn archery and play a lyre or harp ... but no one remembers quite WHY ?? so Zelda does. the Priestess-Princess* role means the public is aware that Zelda had formal singing training, but its not really common knowledge outside of the Castle that the Royal Girls do THIS (no one knows why that part is important either, but it stays in the Castle). she might be a little out of practice now, but give that muscle memory enough time and she might be able to really surprise people.

*this is part of the Japanese translation, at least in Kass' final song Zelda is referred to as an term roughly meaning Priestess-Princess - which makes total sense to me

ohhh my god i talked a lot okay i just love my gorl fhjdkfjdk

actual footage of me explaining my shit and going way long

[roe-and-memory]

i really love thinking about the potential of lightnings childhood. we have no idea what happened, but its up for interpretation, and i think thats great.

neglect - a common headcanon - seems to make so much sense for him. he hates help, he hates being told what to do, but also hes so lonely and in such desperate need of approval and validation that he’ll take the harshest words as long as theyre coming from someone who, at the end of the day, will give him at least one pat on the back for doing something right.

i think this, as we all know, is a major part of his character, but the idea of doc, taking this kid thats been so awfully treated his entire life - who isnt used to affection or any kind of positive attention, who hates being bossed around because he thinks he knows better and can be trusted more than other people would - and essentially finding a midway point so he can be lightnings crew chief in a way that both introduces the idea of gentle help (telling him when to pit, etc etc) and doesnt infringe on lightnings fear? hatred? of being told what to do and how to do it? its perfect. it introduces to this kid with severe abandonment issues the idea of sometimes needing or even just wanting help, and helps him change for the better without forcing him to immediately conform to the idea that oh, he HAS to need help.

lightnings previous crew chiefs are so much different than doc, because while doc takes the time to get to know lightning, to discuss ways they can work together to get around these issues he has while also being able to enforce proper rules within the sport, his crew chiefs before never did this. they didnt get to know him personally, they didnt care. they just knew he didnt listen and had a flaring temper, and it was never really that fair to lightning that they didnt give him a chance. obviously, not all blame is on them, because as much as they didnt put the effort in to find a groove that worked for their driver, he also didnt try to put this effort in (although, really, as an 18 year old with issues surrounding this job that are KNOWN it was never really his job to be the one to initiate finding a solution - hell, he probably didnt even know what the issue was.), he was ALSO the one to fire these people, so they’re both at fault for this in a way.

but, again, i love thinking about this whole childhood thing because not only is doc opening up the help that lightning was always consistently refused to the point he believed he just didnt need it - that all those times he wanted help when he was young was really just him being dramatic - but hes also opening up the option for Family that lightning never had either. doc takes all the awful morals that lightning taught himself (or that harv taught him) because he had no one to teach him the true ones, and flips them around. he becomes the father lightning never had and the guidance that no one had ever given him. god i love found family guys theyre literally father and son

also nobody imagine how silly the first time doc ever ruffles his silly ass sons hair is. lightning freezing because oh, no ones ever done that before, and doc being like ? how badly do i need to kick the shit out of your parents? that is like the most average father appreciation Ever wdym ur dad didnt do that to you at least Once.