#the next episode is where everything goes bad

[undoing-daughters-blog]

I'm going to explain the theory that Jinx is not actually dead

(I know this is long, I promise it's worth it)

This starts in chapter 8 of season two.

We see Jinx in the prision, she's devastated, lost, defeated, and wants things to end. And we see the first interaction she has with the voice of Silco. In this interaction Silco tells Jinx that "killing is a cycle" and that it would continue. But Jinx says she's "done running in circles", meaning: she wants to stop this cycle. To which Silco says:

And later, when Vi goes to visit Jinx, and Jinx tricks Vi and escapes the prison. Vi then asks her what she will do, Jinx answers:

And now Jinx knows the way to break the cycle, is by leaving.

Next time we see Jinx is in episode 9. She is still in the same mood as before, and now she cuts most of her hair off and burns The Last Drop

Burning down The Last Drop and letting go of her hair shows this closure. Later, she tries to kill herself, which is her way of "walking away" to "break the cycle".

But then Ekko shows up, saves her, and they go to save Vi and the others together.

At this point, Jinx wants to stop the killing and wants to leave, but she will always want to save Vi ("I'm always with you. Even when we are worlds apart").

But she still wants to break the cycle. She still needs to let go.

So, as she saves Vi from Warwick with the monkey bomb explosion, she escapes and leaves Piltover.

And we get a hint of that in the final scenes of the show when Caitlyn is going through her mother's database. She finds a blueprint of the hexgate tower and finds secret air ducts in the place where the explosion happened.

We also see her holding a part of Jinx's bomb.

And after seeing the blueprint she has this look. Like she's thinking "is it possible she survived?"

And in the very last scene we see one of these things that is flying away from Piltover.

Which reminds me of Season 1 Episode 1:

She has always wanted to ride one of them.

Maybe, this is her new way of walking away, instead of dying.

And the two frames are almost exactly the same, it couldn't not be a reference to that s1 moment.

And I know this theory may sound dumb but, why would they show us Caitlyn looking at those blueprints then? Every scene, every frame in Arcane is carefully designed. The team is very good, they wouldn't just show it for no reason. It wouldn't make sense. Especially because they have only 9 episodes of 40 minutes each (except 9 which has 50) to develop everything that happens in season two. And there are A LOT of things going on, they don't have time to spare. If they chose to show us that, it had a very important meaning.

Also I think it's kinda bad If Jinx just dies, I wouldn't like that ending, at least not like this.

[wileycap]

So, uh, Netflix Avatar, huh? Yeah. I guess I'll make a really long post about it because ATLA brainrot has is a cornerstone of my personality at this point.

So.

It's okay. B, maybe a C+.

That's it.

Now for the spoilers:

The biggest issue with the Netflix version is the pacing. Scenes come out of nowhere and many of the episodes are disjointed. Example: Aang escaping from Zuko's ship. We see him getting the key and going "aha!", and in the next scene he's in Zuko's room. And then he just runs out, no fun acrobatics or fights, and immediately they go to the Southern Air Temple where he sees Gyatso's corpse, goes into the Avatar state, and then sees Gyatso being really cheesy, comes out of it, and resolves that conflict. Nothing seems to lead into anything. The characters don't get to breathe.

The show's worst mistake (aside from Iroh fucking murdering Zhao) is its' first one: they start in the past. Instead of immediately introducing us to our main characters and dropping us into a world where we have a perfect dynamic where Aang doesn't know the current state of the world and Katara and Sokka don't know about the past, thus allowing for seamless and organic worldbuilding and exposition, they just... tell us. "Hey, this is what happened, ok, time for Aang!" There's no mystery, no intrigue, just a stream of information being shoved down the audience's throats and then onto the next set piece.

The visuals are for the most part great, but like with most Netflix productions, they just don't have great art direction. It feels like a video game cinematic, where everything is meant to be Maximum Cool - and none of the environments get to breathe. It's like they have tight indoor sets (with some great set design) and then they have a bunch of trailer shots. It's oozing with a kind of very superficial love.

Netflix still doesn't know how to do lighting, and with how disjointed the scenes are, the locations end up feeling like a parade of sets rather than actual cities or forests or temples. As for the costumes, Netflix still doesn't know how to do costumes that look like they're meant to be actually worn, so many of the characters seem weirdly uncomfortable, like they're afraid of creasing their pristine costumes.

The acting is decent to good, for the most part. I can't tell if the weaker moments come down to the actors or the direction and editing, but if I had to guess, I'd say the latter. Iroh and Katara are the weakest, Sokka is the most consistent, Zuko hits the mark most of the time, and Aang is okay. I liked Suki (though... she was weirdly horny? Like?) but Yue just fell kind of flat.

The tight fight choreography of the original is replaced with a bunch of spinny moves and Marvel fighting, though there are some moments of good choreography, like the Agni Kai between Ozai and Zuko (there's a million things I could say about how bad it was thematically, but this post is overly long already.) There's an actually hilarious moment in the first episode when Zuko is shooting down Aang, and he does jazz hands to charge up his attack.

Then there's the characters. Everybody feels very static - Zuko especially gets to have very little agency. A great example of that is the scene in which Iroh tells Lieutenant Jee the story of Zuko's scar.

In the original, it's a very intimate affair, and he doesn't lead the crew into any conclusions. Here, Iroh straight up tells the crew "you are the 41st, he saved your lives" and then the crew shows Zuko some love. A nice moment, but it feels unearned, when contrasted with the perfection of The Storm. In The Storm, Zuko's words and actions directly contradict each other, and Iroh's story gives the crew (and the audience) context as to why, which makes Zuko a compelling character. We get to piece it out along with them. Here - Iroh just flat out says it. He just says it, multiple times, to hammer in the point that hey, Zuko is Good Actually.

And then there's Iroh. You remember the kindly but powerful man who you can see gently nudging Zuko to his own conclusions? No, he's a pretty insecure dude who just tells Zuko that his daddy doesn't love him a lot and then he kills Zhao. Yeah. Iroh just plain kills Zhao dead. Why?

Iroh's characterization also makes Zuko come off as dumb - not just clueless and deluded, no, actually stupid. He constantly gets told that Iroh loves him and his dad doesn't, and he doesn't have any good answers for that, so he just... keeps on keeping on, I guess? This version of Zuko isn't conflicted and willfully ignorant like the OG, he's just... kind of stupid. He's not very compelling.

In the original, Zuko is well aware of Azula's status as the golden child. It motivates him - he twists it around to mean that he, through constant struggle, can become even stronger than her, than anyone. Here, Zhao tells him that "no, ur dad likes her better tee hee" and it's presented as some kind of a revelation. And then Iroh kills Zhao. I'm sorry I keep bringing that up, but it's just such an unforgiveable thematic fuckup that I have to. In the original, Zhao falls victim to his hubris, and Zuko gets to demonstrate his underlying compassion and nobility when he offers his hand to Zhao. Then we get some ambiguity in Zhao: does he refuse Zuko's hand because of his pride, or is it his final honorable action to not drag Zuko down with him? A mix of both? It's a great ending to his character. Here, he tries to backstab Zuko and then Iroh, who just sort of stood off to the side for five minutes, goes "oh well, it's murderin' time :)"

They mess with the worldbuilding in ways that didn't really need to be messed with. The Ice Moon "brings the spirit world and the mortal world closer together"? Give me a break. That's something you made up, as opposed to the millenia of cultural relevance that the Solstice has. That's bad, guys. You replaced something real with something you just hastily made up. There's a lot of that. We DID NOT need any backstory for Koh, for one. And Katara and Sokka certainly didn't need to be captured by Koh. I could go on and on, but again, this post is already way too long.

It's, um, very disappointing. A lot of telling and not very much showing, and I feel like all of the characters just... sort of end up in the same place they started out in. I feel like we don't see any of the characters grow: they're just told over and over again how they need to grow and what they need to do.

To sum it up: Netflix Avatar is a mile wide, but an inch deep.

[secriden]

I thought I was done talking about Style in THK's episode 2, but jokes on me, no I'm not.

I keep thinking about Style and Bison's first interaction and how pure and sweet it was. In the middle of the mess that is this 4-way whirlwind of lies and deception, it felt like a refreshingly honest conversation between two people who are only accidentally lying to each other.

Style seems incredibly earnest when he tells Bison that Kant is "down bad" for him. It doesn't feel like Style is 'wingmanning' Kant here; or if he is, it isn't meant to be malicious or to mislead Bison. It feels like someone being friendly with his bff's crush and hoping that they can get along because he thinks this one's going to stick around.

Similarly, when Bison tells Style to go for Fadel for real, it feels very honest and earnest. Setting aside whatever games Bison is playing with Kant, Bison seems to genuinely want someone for his big brother, and not just so he can date who he wants or as a distraction.

It's also interesting how Style's protest is that he can't see himself actually gaining feelings for Fadel because in a way there's nothing to recommend Fadel to Style at this point. As far as Style is concerned, Fadel is arrogant and condescending, rude and ungrateful (after all, he did replace a bunch of parts in Fadel's car for free), a stick in the mud about his brother dating, and can't seem to take a joke.

We see the polite, pleasant and reasonable Fadel, but Style doesn't.

Which is why I've been obsessing over Style's expressions immediately after the conversation with Bison. Bison's parting insight is "He's rough on the outside, and on the inside," and I think he accidentally piqued Style's curiosity with that line. Because why does Bison still want his brother to have a "real" relationship, then? What makes Fadel worth loving, despite (what Style thinks is) nothing to recommend him?

Ugh I wish I knew how to make gifs because BLESS @airenyah FOR MAKING THESE GIFS!!! Dunk goes through a whole sequence of expressions here that suggests a shift happens in the way he's thinking of Fadel. There's a pensive and thoughtful look and then almost like, "Oh what the hell, might as well see where this goes" kind of amusement at the end. And I think the reason he has this shift is because he's realised that Bison clearly loves his brother and that must mean that there's more to Fadel then his initial impression of the man.

It's interesting that his next attempt at messing with Fadel actually invites Fadel to play along with it. It's so much tamer and more private than the previous attempts because he isn't actively trying to humiliate Fadel this time. And it works?? Fadel engages in the roleplay, indulges Style's ridiculousness, actually chops faster (whilst the most hysterical series of minute expressions play over Fadel's face <3). Perhaps this was Style testing the waters: can Fadel engage with something playful and not take everything way too seriously? Huh, turns out, he can!

The next time Style shows up around Fadel, he's circled back to that playful over-the-top flirting that characterised the garage scene. This is the first time in this episode that Style is actually flirting. Every other time was just to frustrate/humiliate Fadel but notice how he's actively trying to look attractive to Fadel now? He's putting all his best (ahem) assets on display, and poor Fadel has no real protection against this. And, oh, Style is loving this! He's gleefully lapping up every single time Fadel fails to completely hide that he's affected by him.

This, though. THIS precisely is the point I think Style decides that he really does want Fadel for himself. There's so much playing out over Style's face: the determination to push things further, the delighted surprise to see Fadel so rattled, the razor sharp focus, and then desire. Style has finally broken through Fadel's "roughness" and he loves it.

If that uncle hadn't walked in, I'm convinced Fadel would have let Style do anything he wanted, and I think Style knew that.

It's the first time Style immediately chases after Fadel when he walks away from him, and he's absolutely delighted when Fadel all but chokes him against the lockers because that means he still has Fadel within reach.

The whole conversation about "love at first sight" is breathtaking because it feels like Style is discovering what's going to make Fadel crack as he says it and realising just how much he wants this. And no, I don't think he's in love with Fadel yet (not by a LONG shot), but I think he realises that he wants Fadel to fall in love with him. This is such a shift from what he expressed in the diner to Bison. In the diner, there was no hope, no chance for this.

The kisses catch Style by surprise too: you can see that he's just reacting, pushing to see where Fadel will finally draw the line. Because Fadel kisses back in the first kiss and actually fails to push Style away for quite some time in the 2nd kiss (the camera purposely lingers on the way Fadel's hands hover over Style's waist without shoving him back). The third kiss is the point Fadel finally starts fighting, and in the immidate aftermath you can see Style watching so carefully again. And Fadel nearly kisses him again, you see the way Fadel's eyes drop to Style's lips, the way they both freeze and linger in the moment for that one second. The way Style registers that moment and it leaves Style shaken himself.

It's so interesting that this is how we leave Style in this episode (we only see Fadel's fantasy version of Style after this point). I've got two possible interpretations for this line:

Style possibly catches on that Fadel is more dangerous than he seems. Maybe just from vibes, maybe from something in the way Fadel threatened him that kicks off some kind of fearful instinct. This could be what makes Style start questioning if Kant told him the full story and lead to whatever scene it is where Style demands answers in the episode 3 preview.

Alternatively, perhaps Fadel is starting to become real to Style in ways he wasn't before. Fadel was almost a caricature of a man, one which Style didn't like very much before, and that made it easier to fool around with him. But this? This almost tortured man who clearly wants Style but can't seem to give into that desire? Something is going on and Style isn't sure it's worth the game to either of them anymore. Because maybe Style recognises that he's more affected than he should be. And that has implications that Style was not ready for.

[tinylilacbun]

What about that episode in season 2 where they’re on the boat and at first toddler reader feels like really sea sick and Rafe is just so soft and takes care of her, and holding her, making sure she’s okay. But then when everything starts happening she get like really scared, and when Rafe goes to “check it out” (fight John B) he tells reader to stay with Rose, and she’s all scared and sobbing. But after everything when she sees Rafe again after he got the cross she starts crying and he just scoops her up and comforts her.

The Coastal Venture

Pairing: brother!rafe cameron x toddler!sister!reader

Warnings: vomiting (sea-sickness), lots of episode dialogue used, mentions of guns, slight shouting, reader getting scared, soft!rafe (only for reader obv), some angst, not proofread, word count: 1,6k

A/N: SCENE BASED FICS HAVE ME POSSESSED ISTG

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As your eyes flutter open you whine and turn on your stomach before pushing yourself up in a sitting position, rubbing your eyes and yawning, wrinkling your nose at the scent of saltwater.

When your eyes finally adjust you furrow your brows and look around the dingy and small room you're in, standing up on the cot you were sleeping on just seconds ago to look out the window, seeing nothing but the ocean.

You turn your head at the sound of the door creaking open, seeing Rafe coming inside with a fresh set of clothes for.

"Morning, kid." He smiles faintly at the way your hair sticks in all directions and the confused pout on your face. "Sleep well?"

"Where we goin?" You ask, plopping back on your butt as you rub the sleep from your eyes.

Rafe scratches his jaw, walking over to sit down next to. "Just on a little vacation. Arms up." He grabs the hem of your pajama shirt, lifting it over your head.

As your brother helps you get dressed you slowly start to wake up more, feeling a little dizzy from the slight rocking of the boat, leaning against him as you let out a pitiful whine.

"What's wrong?" He asks, brushing your hair from your face he notices how pale you are. "Feel sick?"

When you nod he swiftly picks you up, letting you burrow your face in his shoulder as he carries you to a small bathroom nearby, it's not the cleanest and only has a toilet with a sink, but it will do for now.

You whimper as Rafe sets you down on the ground near the toilet, the nauseous feeling getting worse every second. "Rafey..."

"I'm here, you're gonna feel better in a moment." He assures you, squatting down behind you the second you start to vomit, rubbing your back to let you know he's there.

He waits patiently as you empty your stomach, feeling bad for not being able to help you right now and only able to watch as the tears flow down your cheeks.

Once he is sure you are done he grabs a piece of toilet paper and cleans your mouth and chin before picking you up again, flushing the toilet and making his way through the boat.

"I got a surprise for you..." He whispers, reaching his free hand up to wipe the remaining tears from your face as he nears a door with the label 'state room' on it, pushing it open.

You lift your head and your eyes light up at seeing your father sitting there and talking to Sarah, squealing out. "Daddy!"

Ward turns his head and gives you a soft smile, shifting his chair as Rafe lets you down and opens his arms for you when he sees you rushing towards him, catching you effortlessly. "Hey there, sweetheart."

"Knew you woulds come back!" You giggle, feeling him press a kiss to the top of your head, tightening your grip on his shirt.

You obviously didn't understand this whole situation of him faking his death, simply thinking he was gonna be away for a while, at least that's what Rafe told you after him and the others saw the video Ward recorded before this action.

Your father chuckles and loosens his hold on you, watching as you toddle back over to Rafe and climb onto his lap before he turns his attention back to Sarah. "Sweetie, what I need you to understand more than anything is that I never imagined that you would be there."

You drone out their conversation as Rafe taps your cheek, holding a pill between his fingers, whispering to you. "Say 'aaa'. This is gonna help your sea-sickness."

You quickly open your mouth and let him place the pill on your tongue, taking a few sips from the juice box he holds up for you.

"But I had to make sure Rafe got away."

"Thank you, dad." Rafe says, not looking away from you as you keep drinking, patting your back when you cough. "At least one of us is grateful."

"That's psychopathic, both of you." Sarah claims, her voice wavering as she tries not to cry.

"I promised Rafe that he wouldn't go to prison for helping me." Ward explains and you furrow your brows, looking up at your brother.

"Prison? You been bad?" You ask innocently.

"No, I mean, not really, I was just trying to help dad, y'know? Not that Sarah cares." He says the last part a bit louder for her to hear.

"Did it look like I didn't care when I thought Dad was dead?" She raises her voice now as well, feeling hurt of being accused to not care at all.

"I-It actually looked like you cared about running off with some asshole." Rafe interjects, holding his hands over your ears.

"Rafe, please." Ward tries to ease the tension between the siblings.

"It looked like all you cared about was the inheritance!" Sarah snaps at him.

"Yes, you cared! You cared! That's the point!" Ward finally shouts. "Anybody on that dock could see how much you cared, sweetheart. And I know you're angry now, rightfully so. The important thing is that it's all behind us now. It is."

As if you could feel the tension in the air you clamber down from Rafe's lap and make your way over to Sarah, climbing onto the bench she is sitting on and go to hug her, much to Rafe's dismay.

"We're gonna live a new life." Your father continues. "All of us together. Sarah where I'm taking you, it's paradise. It's off this place called Guadaloupe. And oh, by the way, all those A's you got in French are about to pay off, 'cause they speak French there."

Sarah shakes her head, detaching your arms from her neck. "I want to call my friends, and I want to call my boyfriend. Can I at least just tell them that I'm okay?"

You frown making your way over to Rafe again and stand between his legs, leaning your back against his front as you play with the gold ring on his finger.

"Yes, of course you can. As soon as we get there, you can call John B. He knows you're here, right?" Ward says and Sarah interrupts him.

"No, he doesn't."

"Yeah, he does. When you were getting ready, he came by the house, and Rose talked to him. You know the cross you've all been looking for? Rafe was able to get it." He tells her, gesturing towards Rafe.

She sighs, leaning against the back cushion.

Some time passes and you're left in the state room together with your mom and Wheezie after Sarah sneaked off, Rose holding you in her arms as she paces the room when Rafe came back in, a crease in his brows as he glances around.

"Where's Sarah?" He questions.

As Rose explains to him what happened you start to squirm in her arms, wanting to be put down so you can go to Rafe, and she reluctantly sets you down, afraid you might fall if you keep wriggling.

Instantly you crash into your brother's legs, lifting your arms in a silent request to be picked up by him but pout when he only ruffles your hair. "Not now, princess. I gotta handle something, just stay here yeah?"

You whine, stomping your feet a few times. "Wanna stay with you, Rafey!"

"Rose, would you?" He clenches his jaw, trying not to cave when she goes to lift you in her arms again and at how you cry for him, turning on his heel and leaving the room again, closing the door behind him, set with determination to catch those damn pogues.

You keep crying and whining for Rafe, not even your lovey and paci comforting you and easing the fear you're feeling right now, so many things keep happening, first Rafe telling you to stay and then your father warning you, or more specifically Rose and Wheezie to stay in here no matter what they hear.

Wheezie, mostly always the one being calm, starts to panic a little and Rose tries to comfort her, giving her a hug and some reassuring words, pulling away and looking around the room. "W-Where's Y/n?"

Rose follows her gaze, her eyes landing on the open door and gasps as she quickly stands up, running to look if you're still in the hallway, cursing when you're nowhere to be seen.

You let out a grunt as you try to open one of the doors, pushing with all your might until you're able to slip through, suddenly standing outside on the deck. "Mmm, Rafey?"

Taking more hesitant steps outside you smile when you see Rafe getting up from the ground after saving the cross from falling off the boat, walking over to one of the crew members, your eyes widen when you see him getting handed a gun.

You watch as he positions himself and aims his gun at towards the ocean, trying to see what he's pointing at but your eyes are too blurry with tears, gripping your lovey tightly.

Rafe snaps out of his adrenaline haze when he hears you sobbing nearby, quickly narrowing the gun before putting the safety back on and throwing it to the side, striding over to you.

"Hey, hey, hey. What- What are you doing out here? C'mere..." He instantly picks you up, cradling you against him as he shushes you, turning his head and watching the dinghy with the pogues getting further away. "Everything's gonna be okay now..."

"Wanna stay with you, pwease..." You sniffle, shoving your face in the crook of his neck.

"A'ight, okay, I got you." He keeps reassuring you, grabbing the pacifier that's attached to your plushie and pushing it into your mouth, carrying you back inside and towards the room you woke up in earlier.

Taglist

For everything:

@my-river-lilly @pauntedblacknails @fanfictioniseverything @buckymydarlingangel @hallecarey1 @daybreakwinter @loveshineslikethesky @vase-of-lilies @white-wolf1940 @simpingbutch @mischiefsemimanaged @alina02 @teddybearsgrr @doozywoozy @angelbabydoll28 @lilymurphy03 @veryvaughnny @lokigirlszendaya @youngstarfishdinosaur @little--baby--bear @minideathgoddess @rach2602 @gh0stgurl @flourishandblotts-inc @lovelyy-moonlight @yoruse

@mythixmagic @iris-xoxo-juhu @mylettterstoyou @sunf1ower16 @sweetstars-posts @rafecameronsloverrrrr @rafesdoeeyeddoll

For Rafe:

@chiaraanatra @chimindity @erikasurfer

[mjbarrosart]

My Dragon Prince Boards season 6, episode 605

Ok folks, It is time to go trough the next episode of season 6 I worked, episode 605.

When you are working on an episode as a storyboard artist you, usually, want to choose how to approach your sequences. Most of the time your will get instructions from your director and supervisor to do things in certain ways, making sure that things aligning between episodes and general season arcs; but most of details of your sequences are up to you.

In this episode I had the huge privilege to tackle most of Soren and Viren interactions, and a big question for my, from the beginning, was "what will be my approach?"

Because, how I see it, there are 2 big forces, struggles, arcs- or whatever you want to call it- in conflict during this sequences. In one hand, you have Soren and his pain, and in the other hand, you have Viren and his desire for forgiveness.

I decided to approach this sequences from Viren's, because 2 reasons mainly:

The first one, is the most obvious one, is that- at least for me- Soren's arc is already resolved, of course he is in real pain, and he is a victim of abuse and there is a lot of trauma that he needs to heal, but his overall arc resolved in season 3. He is one of the goof guys now, and he knows where he stands. This is an important moment for his healing, for sure, but it is more relevant to Viren's arc that is still incomplete at this point.

The second reason is more personal. While I am a daughter, I have the blessing of having a really good relationship with my parents, so while I understand Soren's trauma, I have not a lot of personal experience to pour into. But, I am also a mother, and from that point of view, I deeply understand Viren. I still think that he is a villain, and what he did was wrong in all levels, but I can absolutely connect with the idea of "parents sacrifice for their children, not the other way around".

Parenting is the eternal struggle between being able to do anything for your children well being, and understanding that they are their own person, and their have the right to make their own mistakes and live their own life.

So yeah, that is what was in my mind during this episode, now let's check sequence by sequence!

My first sequence is a sweet one, between Ezran and Soren. I usually don't have a lot of sequences with the young king, so it is always fun to work with him

Overall, it is a simple and sweet moment between this two, I love how much Soren respects Ezran but at the same time tries to keep it casual, haha. I love the idea of friends loving and supporting each other.

My next sequence is when Soren goes to visit Viren for the first time. This is a big one. In one hand, Viren wants to talk and express everything he has to say, in the other Soren holding up his feelings, dealing with confusion and anger.

The sequence opens with the shot of Viren in the cell and the fly on the spider web. It's a pretty on the nose metaphor that we used through the full episode.

A less on the nose metaphor I tried to build during the sequences was using the bars as a framing devise to show emotional states. When Viren is talking with guilt and resentment, he is usually framed behind the bars. When he is talking from a place of love, taking into consideration Soren's feelings and acknowledging the damage ha has caused, he usually is framed without the bars.

This is a sequence where they fail to connect, and by the end, Viren tries to follow Soren, but the chains stop him. There is still a huge division between both of them.

Next sequences is another interaction, This time, they will talk, but it will not be good. We start with Viren, still trapped, suffering. He is a little calmer now. He tries to connect with Soren, but it is still hard, the bars are between them, and the pain is keeping them apart.

But then, Viren starts to talk more freely, to recognize his mistakes, the damage that he caused to Soren, to Claudia. The ways he was a bad parent and hurt them both. So we flip the framing, now Viren is free, Soren is behind the bars.

Soren's pain is stopping him from healing and is coming out as rage.

he has a hard time believing whatever his father is telling him. In the past, Viren manipulated him, why now would be different. It is so hard to break cycles of abuse, and it is hard to forgive, too. Some people don't deserve forgiveness, to be honest. And I am not sure if Soren ever will forgive Viren.

So Soren burst into rage. I wanted to create a pretty visceral reaction. Talking with his hands and body, almost like puking out his feelings, so much pain that he can not hold anymore. But this is not necessarily what he needs. He screams at Viren, he hits the bars, he leaves in rage, and the wound is still open.

And Viren is defeated again. Forgiveness will not be something easy to get.

My next sequences is a short silly one, hahaha. Rayla and Callum going to fight the beast. I swear to god i have the "Slash, Slash, Swirly dash" line stuck in my head until today ><

Well, back to the drama.

My last sequence of the episode is when Viren wakes up, and Soren is there.

This time, there is no confrontation between them. Viren understands that no matter what he says, he may never be never forgiven. So he stops trying to "convince" Soren that he is sorry, and just tell him what he thinks Soren needs to hear.

And after that Soren leaves, maybe for the first time ready to start the path to healing.

And that was my work on episode 605!!

Thanks for reading this long post, again!

If you have any questions about the board process on Dragon prince, please feel free to ask! Also, I always read all the comments you put in the tags, they always make me smile :) Thank you!!!

Soon I'll post about my work on 608!

[eisforeidolon]

Question: You guys have been so close for so long, what would you say each other's greatest character trait is and why?

Jared: As people? And I have to say this in front of him?

[Jensen theatrically turns to Jared, crosses his leg, and props his chin on his hand to listen]

Jared: I mean, where do I start, honestly? But I'd say one of the things that has been abundantly obvious to me, and I relied on for almost the last twenty years? Is he doesn't give up. He doesn't give up - not on a project, not on a person. He just goes, like, alright, one step at a time, let's do it. Not that he doesn't get down, I mean, we're all humans, we have good days and bad days [Jensen nods]. But when the shit hits the fan, he's - I always said he'd be a good, like, Navy Seal or something. 'Cause he's just like, okay, what's next? I can't change that, what are we doing? Like, didn't you just hear, the camera broke, the stage is on fire. And he's like, alright, well, can we get something from tomorrow's work? Like, he's just sort of like, alright - he goes. And that, that - I don't want to say it's confidence, because it doesn't come from a place of arrogance, or some ego? It just comes from alright then what can we do? And so it's infectious to go like, well, that guy over there, Jensen, he's still ready to get after it, even though everything went wrong and everything broke and everything's on fire, he's still ready to carry on. To borrow the name of an episode. So I think that that permeates a lot of his life, whether things are great or things are not great? He just goes, like, okay, cool, what's next? I can't change that, so what can I do, what can we do? And he doesn't put - he's not one of those drill sergeant, hey, I'm ready to do it, you better do it. But you see him doing and well, if he can do it, then maybe I can, too. So it's a very hopeful attitude, that I really appreciated. [Jensen pats Jared's leg, Jared pats his back]

Jensen: There are many, so I will pick one. And one that I admire and I, you know, wish I had more of is his appetite for knowledge in the things he becomes even remotely interested in. He can take a subject, any topic, and wonder about it. And he doesn't continue to wonder very long. I just kind of sit in that wonderment for a while, oh, that's - I wish I knew more about that. Oh well. Jared dives deep. And almost in just an insatiable appetite way of wanting to know more and that zest for knowledge and life is - it's inspiring? But it's just so unique and powerful for somebody to have that and have that drive to wanna know so much more about so many different - I mean the guy is insanely intelligent in a way that - I always knew he was smart, I always knew he had a really great head on his shoulder, but. Shoulders. Two just stunningly muscular shoulders. But he gets an interest in something and he just digs in so, like, amazingly. And any subject - if it's academics, if it's wanting to know about - like I'm always like, hey Jared, what supplements should I be on? Because I know he knows all about it. Or hey man, I'm looking for a book right now, what are your recommendations? And he'll give me thirteen, fourteen recommendations. He just has - his brain works in just such a brilliant way that I've always been in awe of how he's able to do that and do it consistently. You know he doesn't burn out, he doesn't tire out with the zest that he has for wanting to know more about life, and it too is infectious. And I was it was more infectious, I wish I would be infected with it completely. But I get a little bit of it and it's inspiring for me to wanna just know more and learn more and have that desire for knowledge the way he does. It's really really impressive and I think it's had an amazing impact on his life and the way that he can relate to so many different - you put him in a room with anybody and he will have a researched knowledgeable way of communicating with just about anybody and everybody on almost any topic. And that to me is just incredible, so. And again, that's one of many things that I could say, but that one just popped to the front. [Jared squeezes Jensen's knee and then puts his hand on his back]

[generalluxun]

Revisiting S5 E14 Derision, and Making it Work

It's *easy* to dunk on Derision. I won't rehash all the holes here. What is harder is actually doing better... or so you would think.

What follows is a back-of-the-napkin idea I threw together in about 5 minutes. So I hope it doesn't meet with universal... derision. 🐈‍⬛

Reworking this episode reaches back earlier into S5 and recasts one of the side/new characters... but bear with me it's to good purpose. When you're creating a pivotal pre-canon character moment 5 seasons in, there's going to be a little collateral.

It begins with... Socqueline.

Socqueline was NOT Marinette's savior at FDP. In truth... she was Marinette's bully. She was everyone's bully in fact. She ruled FDP with an iron fist. Teachers were afraid of her, and no not her dad, her. Socqueline is the one who terrorized Marinette and pulled the awful prank. The prank that was bad enough that she was expelled. Marinette meets her unexpectedly at the craft store, and is instantly a yr younger and in shock.

HOWEVER

Socqueline is still the one pretending to be Ladybug. She's still the one trying to help people. She's still kind and helpful and Marinette is so very confused! You see, being expelled, having to be in an entirely new environment, and even just a year of change and reflection has made Socqueline a different person. She has grown and is trying to do good to make up for being bad before. Why is she done up like Marinette? She's not! She's done up like Ladybug. She's emulating her hero and inspiration. (who is of course, Marinette).

This already gives us some really good changes.

1)We have a valid reason for Marinette to not have seen/wanted to see Socqueline until S5. you don't go seeking out your former bully.

2)We have a cover for why Marinette hasn't reacted to stimulus before now. She was 'doing good' until she crossed paths with Socqueline and after that. *bam* right in the Trauma. It doesn't matter that Socqueline has changed, trauma is trauma. Marinette hasn't processed it yet, so it gets stoked.

3)Have Kim think Socqueline's pranks were funny. He's Kim, he's thick as two boards, at least he's not gushing about how hot another girl is right next to poor Ondine. It leans into Dark Humor just fine on it's own. Skip the Adrien/Chloe scene for a Marinette/Socqueline scene where Marinette brings up the event to Socqueline and how much it impacted her. have Socquline apologize(she did back in Jubilation for everything, but have her also for this specific thing) have it end on a hug, how nice.

Already we're doing much better! But wait, there's more!

We cut Chloé out of Derision! What does this mean? If she wasn't Marinette's bully doesn't this mess everything up?

No, not really.

Chloé wasn't Marinette's bully pre-canon in any meaningful way. She didn't rule the roost. She only stepped up once Socqueline was expelled, trying to fill the power vacuum/rule the roost/be the new Queen. She's just really bad at it. This explains why the class and even Marinette react to Chloé even in S1 with a sort of exasperated resignation and Marinette isn't even remotely afraid to snap back at her. It's not 'Oh no she is such a bully' it's 'oh God, Chloé's on her shit again.' She's still a brat, mean, and entitled. We're not rewriting any of that. She'll even be an antagonist in S5, but we're going to lean more heavily into Lila/Gabe/Tomoé actively manipulating her, much like in S3. She's not evil, but she's very easily persuaded to be bad.

you see- What we've done with Socquline is foreshadowing. We've shown someone who WAS a bully, who changed when their environment changed and they found the right motivation/inspiration. So when Chloé is going down in flames in S5 we're going to build organically on the parental abuse into the manipulation by villains. We seek to inspire frustration with her, revulsion with those manipulating her, agony that the manipulation all goes unseen, and of course sympathy for everyone who has to deal with it. However, we've also set up the seeds for a future where her environment changes, where a new motivation/inspiration comes in, and where we get convert her from brat to ... okay maybe not GOOD person but at least a decent little porcupine. 🤣

We've even given Marinette a firsthand experience that change CAN happen. Which is something she didn't have the first time around with Chloé during S2/3.

So, what do y'all think?

[turcott3]

angel

matt rempe x fem! reader

warnings?: switches from third to second pov a few times, cursing, talks of fighting, talks of smut, crying, alcohol

loosely based on black mirror episode ‘arkangel’

(third person will be written in italics)

masterlist

-

2011

you found your way to the open pavement as the final school bell rang. the basketball court and black top was where everyone hung out that didn’t ride the bus, which was honestly a good chunk of people.

you found your way to your everyday meeting spot, and sat down on the large rock. the same rock where you met up with your sister everyday. you noticed the trouble maker kid outside as well.

his name was matthew. he was in the third grade, you in first.

you tend to watch him from afar, listening in on his conversations. something about him drew you in. you were so intrigued by his presence. recently, you’d discovered that he plays hockey, and now he was getting deeper into it

hockey this, hockey that. that’s all he talked about now.

all his friends were called over by their parents one by one and soon he was left alone, drawing his attention to you. he walks quickly over to you.

the two of you knew each other vaguely, you were at least on a first name basis given you’d been outside together many times before your sister graced you with her presence.

“so you play hockey?” you ask.

“yeah, how’d you know?” he asks, tilting his head to the side slightly.

“well i just heard you talking.” you replied.

“oh so you were snooping?” he retorts.

“well no i-“

“you wanna learn about it?” he offers and you nod.

“i think i should tell you about my favorite part.” he smirks.

he begins rambling on vaguely about the sport but focusing on his alleged favorite part.

fighting.

“and then he takes his fist and he-“

“matthew stop it!” your sister shouts, speed walking into frame.

“what?” he asks.

“stopping scaring my sister. you’re freaking her out with all your scary, violent stuff.”

“i haven’t even told her anything about it yet.” he spat his words out strongly at her.

“whatever. she’s 6, she doesn’t need to know about that stuff.” your sister says clenching your shoulder one last time.

“you can tell me another time.” you whisper to him, guarding your mouth from her view.

“i heard that y/n. and no, he won’t tell you another time. come on, mom is waiting.” she says tugging your sleeve. you couldn���t help but keep your eyes locked on his frame as he directed his story elsewhere. silly, frantic punching motions coming from the boy.

-

2013

you sat alone on the ground as you watched all the kids run around at recess.

more specifically, matt playing football with his friends.

you sighed as you picked the small weed flowers, stuffing the pretty ones in your pocket for later. you hear yells from the group of boys playing football and look up, seeing matthew slow to a stop, his eyes on you.

“hey guys uh, ill be back in a few.” he shouts, jogging in your direction. you felt a lump in your throat as he approached.

“hey y/n.”

“hi.”

“what’s wrong? everything okay?” he asks, genuine concern lining his tone.

“yeah, my friend is sick today so, i don’t have anyone to play with.”

“i’m sorry, here,” he pauses sitting down next to you, “now you have someone.”

you smile at the gesture. as much of a bad, misbehaved kid he was, he was always so kind to you, and you never knew why.

“so you play football now?” you ask, looking at the flowers you picked.

“nah, just here. can’t play hockey at recess can i?” he asks leaning closer, nudging your shoulder.

“yeah i guess you’re right.” you giggle.

“well since my sisters in middle school now, you can finally tell me about hockey. i just don’t wanna stop your game over there.” you continue.

“they can play without me.” he simply replies.

“oh…. okay.”

“so you wanna hear about it now aye?” he teases.

“yeah.” you reply shyly. he goes on to tell you about the new rules he was learning, obviously building up to his favorite part.

the fighting. again.

“i’m a lot bigger than the other guys so, it’s easy for me to beat them up.” he says.

“really?”

“yeah, i think i’ve broken a few noses. you should look on youtube when you get home. just look up hockey fights. they’re awesome.” he tells you finally as your teacher called out for you to come back inside.

“thank you for sitting with me matthew.”

“yeah you’re welcome, oh, and you can call me matt by the way.” he replies as you nod and walk away from him. growing more and more curious about him by the day.

-

2017

you were a month into your seventh grade year, freshly 13 years old. matt had moved on up to highschool. it made you a little sad not seeing him in the halls during school but since you rode with your sister, who was now a junior, you saw him sitting outside once school got out.

you sighed as you walked past him at a distance. swarmed by girls he seemed mildly interested in.

“ooo shiny new hockey player. kiss my ass.” you mumble to yourself, keeping your head pointed to the ground as you walked to your sisters car. you heard matt’s voice in the distance telling the girls he’d catch them later.

“y/n, wait up.” he calls to you, jogging to catch up to you.

“hey matt.” you smile lightly, blushing at him ditching all those girls to see you.

“how’s big ol’ seventh grade going for ya?” he asks as you continue walking.

“oh it’s good. kinda boring. middle school is dumb.”

“yeah well, i miss seeing you in the halls. highschool better come quick. i’ll catch you later y/n, my moms here.” he nudges your arm as you wave bye to him.

“was that matt?” your sister asks as you approach the car.

“yeah it was.”

“what did he want?” she scoffs as you both shut your car doors.

“he’s not some evil, disgusting monster you know? we’re friends, kinda.” you reply.

“i just don’t want him to be a bad influence on you.”

“you don’t see me fighting people at school do you?”

“well no-“

“then there you go. he’s not.”

“okay y/n.” she replies, pulling out into the road and driving home.

you had no idea why she had formed this resentment for him. he hadn’t done anything to her, she just took what she heard of him and ran with it.

the rest of the drive home was quiet, she made you mad and you were done. defending matt against your sister wasn’t on the books today, but you were sure to get an earful from your mother later.

-

2018

you walked with your friend away from the buses and to the side entrance of the school, seeing matt leaned up against his brand new range rover, girls and his friends swarmed in a small group around him.

“look at that, matt’s sick new ride.”

“yeah.”

“let’s go see it.” she says grabbing your hand and dragging you in his direction.

“y/n.” he shouts, everyone’s attention directing to you.

“nice new wheels.” your friend says, staring into his soul, but him still having eyes on you.

“how you been, haven’t seen you around much this summer.” he asks you honestly.

“oh i’m good thanks matt. and yeah, nice car.” you blush.

“thanks. bells ringing soon. we should get going yeah?” he says leaning up off his car leaving his crew behind, slinging an arm over your shoulder as eyes hit you like daggers.

“can’t let you get lost on your first day.” he says and you giggle.

“matt.” you mumble and he stops outside your classroom, your friend waving as she turns off down another hall.

“what’s up?” he replies.

“everyone’s staring at me.” you say, escaping his grip.

“it’s just because of my new car, trust me, they don’t actually want me…. i think.” he doubts his words looking around.

“matt you know that’s not true.”

“okay whatever it doesn’t matter, i don’t give two shits about people. they stare, they stare. that doesn’t change me walking you to class.” he says.

“well you need to get to yours before you’re late.”

“yeah yeah i know, meet me after school today though, ill give you a ride home.” he he says as nudges your shoulder.

“okay, bye.” you wave as he walks off.

“meet me after school.” you whisper to yourself and scoff.

you sat with an old friend in class and she mentions the homecoming dance coming early. something you’d totally forgotten about.

“oh shit you’re right. i gotta start looking.” you giggle as the teacher begins the lecture.

hours later you found yourself walking to matt’s car, where he once again stood leaned against it. once you were close he climbed in, you shortly behind.

“why are you taking me home?”

“felt like being nice.”

“oh, okay.”

“so what was it you wanted to talk to me about?” you asked interrupting the silence.

“i just wanted to ask if you’d go to homecoming with me? i know it’s early so i figured i should get ahead.” he says turning his head to you, a blush spreading across your face.

-

“no way, no. you’re not going with him.” your mom says as you sat at the counter.

“mom, why not.” you groan.

“because, that kid is bad news y/n. i don’t trust him.”

“he’s not though, he’s perfectly fine.”

“and i don’t believe you. you can go with your friends, no means no.” she says, setting your plate down on the counter.

“whatever.” you reply, knowing you’re gonna have to text him the news within the next hour.

a short month later you found yourself all ready for the dance.

“you look beautiful.” your mom smiles as you walk down the stairs. you were meeting your friends for dinner, and still going to the dance with matt. behind her back of course, you didn’t want to tell him no.

you spent a while at the dance before you left with matt and a few friends for a bonfire by the lake, wrapped in matt’s blazer.

“can you pass me that?” he says lowly next to you as his friend tosses him a beer.

“matt, you drove.”

“i know, this is for you to drink.” he smiles.

“what?”

“come on y/n. you know you’re safe with me.” he says unscrewing the cap and handing it to you. you couldn’t find it in yourself to deny him.

you’d never drank before and considering you were 15, you were a light weight. matt being 16 you expected the same but were surprised that he decided to only have one, which hardly gave him a buzz. next thing you knew you were sat in his lap on the log, hug him onto him. things around the fire had gotten awkward with all the couples making out.

“can we go sit in your car?” you whisper to him and he agrees, helping you off his lap and holding your hand all the way to the car, knowing uneven ground and heels were a recipe for disaster.

“i brought some stuff in case of something like this.” he says opening the back doors and revealing a few blankets and pillows. you looked up at him with a hazy smile as he tossed them in the trunk and pushed the seats down, the two of you climbing in and setting up camp.

you shed the blazer, tossing it in the front seat as you laid in a comfortable silence, the two front windows cracked for airflow.

“so.” matt says, leaning up on an elbow.

“so?”

“how’s the night been?”

“oh it’s been good.” you reply, turning your head to him and smiling to see his eyes locked on your lips, you quickly turning away.

“don’t get all shy on me y/n.” he giggles, pulling you closer to him.

“sorry, you just look really good right now.” you reply.

“and you look even better.” he mumbles before attaching your lips.

the night continued in full physical contact. he learned every curve and crevice of her body carefully, paying attention to every detail. making note of what she liked and disliked. teaching her the right ways to everything. his hands held her carefully as he worshipped her under his breath, quiet whimpers and curses leaving her lips every few moments, before it all came crashing down after a long few minutes.

“you know, you didn’t have to say those things.” he giggles to you.

“well those are things i learned while i’m watching porn on my phone at night, i- i didn’t know what to do. was it bad? i’m sorry.”

“no no, my love, you were amazing. you were perfect.” he says cupping your jaw and dipping down to kiss you one more time. moments later, they’re interrupted by loud bangs on the window.

“you’re so fucking busted. it’s almost two in the morning y/n. i had to come track you down.” you hear your sisters stern voice outside the car window.

“fuck oh my god, what the hell.” you scramble, making sure your dress was on straight.

“it’s not what it looks like.” you express leaping out of the car.

“yes the fuck it is.”

“please don’t tell mom. please i’m begging you.”

“no, i’m telling her you were with him after she explicitly told you not to.”

“hey that’s no-“ he starts and is quickly cut off.

“and you kissed him, and god knows what else. god just get in the car.” she sighs, pointing to her car up the hill.

“matt im sorry, i really am.” you sigh and he nods.

“it’s okay, i didn’t know they felt this way about me.”

“you don’t exactly have good rep, rempe.” you sister spits, shoving you along. immediately you text him apologizing profusely.

your sister knew he just took your virginity. it was no mystery, the windows were fogged and dripping, your hair came undone, his buttons were crooked. she swore not to tell all the details, but in no way were you ever gonna be able to go near him again. except for in the hallways at school.

“you know he’s trouble y/n. you let him get in your pants?”

“yeah i did, and he’s not as much trouble as you think he is. he’s very nice to me.”

“it doesn’t matter. you’re not seeing him again, you hear me?” she says sternly and you sigh, resting your head against the window.

“yeah.” you reply, a tear falling down your cheek as he texted back, repeating that everything was fine.

-

“what were you thinking young lady.” your mom startles you awake.

“what?”

“you were kissing matthew in his car at the bonfire? really?” she says standing at the foot of your bed with her arms crossed.

“i’m sorry.” you sigh, tears threatening to spill again.

“what did i tell you about being around him?”

“i know mom i’m sorry, i really like him okay? he’s not how you think he is.” you reply wiping the tears that started to fall.

“yeah well, i really just don’t believe you. he’s not a good influence y/n. it’s just a warning this time, you will not see him again.” she finishes and you nod.

“you know i love you.” she says walking toward your door.

“i know, even if that’s a tough thing to believe.” you reply and she chuckles exiting you room.

and that you didn’t. you didn’t hang out outside of the school halls. all you did was text. every. single. day.

-

2022

matt knocked on the door and anxiously rocked back and forth on his heels. he knew that her sister and her mom weren’t his biggest fans. hell, you could say they hate his guts, but he knew he had to make it right.

“we don- matt? what do you want?” her mom sighs opening the door.

“i’m taking your daughter to prom.” he says firmly, a light smile on his face.

“she has a boyfriend?” her sister interjects walking up to the door.

he sighs as he looks down at the flowers.

“listen, i know you guys aren’t my biggest fans,” he starts.

“yeah, you could say that.” her sister mumbles.

“but i know this isn’t my news to air but, he broke up with her this morning. we’ve been friends for years, texting for years, whatever. she was so excited for this dance and i- i really fucking, sorry, i really care about her. i really want her to have a good night, i’d do anything to make sure she’s happy and i’d do anything to make things right with you guys.” he states heartfully.

“well.” her mom sighs, her heart seemingly growing larger for the boy that stood in front of her with a large, fresh bouquet of flowers and a nice ironed tux.

“and she doesn’t know, i wanted to surprise her, if that’s okay?”

“yeah it is. thank you matthew. we had no idea, we only saw her this morning.”

“yeah that’s about when it happened.” he replies scratching the back of his head as her mom shuts the door behind her.

“her rooms up there on the right.” she smiles lightly.

“thank you mrs. y/l/n. i really do appreciate it.” he replies making his way up the stairs, knocking lightly on the door.

“are you ready?” he says through the door.

“what?” you call back.

“can i come in?” he asks, you not recognizing the voice. you sat at your vanity with curlers in your hair and your makeup half done. you couldn’t stop crying.

“yes?”

“hey.” you see matt’s face peek through the door before stepping in, fully dressed in a tux, with a large, lush bouquet and a sweet smile.

“matt?” you say, putting down your brush, immediately standing up from your chair and walking over to him.

“i got these for you, i tried my best to match your dress.” he says looking over at the dress that hung from your closet door.

“matt.” you frown sweetly. for the first time since your freshman year, you hugged onto him, tightly. you feel him freeze for a moment before tossing the flowers onto your bed and wrapping his arms around you, picking you briefly up off the ground.

“thank you for this.” you say sweetly as you pull away, his hands still placed on your waist.

“you know i’ll always come around. anything for you.”

“really?”

“yeah, really.” he smiles, pressing a short peck to the top of your head.

“hey, we got reservations in an hour, chop chop pretty girl.” he giggles into your hair.

“i’ll be done, just give me like 30 minutes.” you reply, picking up the flowers and inspecting them.

“of course, no rush. it’s close by. i’ll be downstairs okay?”

“okay.” you smile lightly as he exits your room, your heart pounding in your chest as you got ready quickly. you zipped up your dress and grabbed the flowers, looking in the mirror at the perfect match he’d picked. you sighed in relief knowing the boy you’d been longing since you were a little girl surprised you and is waiting downstairs for you.

you breathe out as you open the door and turn the corner, walking down the stairs where matt and your mom were waiting, his eyes following you every step down.

“you look beautiful honey.” your mom sighs, looking at the gorgeous dress you’d picked out a few months ago.

“absolutely stunning.” matt says, eyes still locked on you.

“thank you guys.” you blush.

“let me get a picture of you two, uh, y/n stand on the second step, i want the full dress in without having to cut this giant’s head off.” she laughs stepping back with her camera and snapping a few photos.

“thank you for doing this for her matthew, i really appreciate it.”

“of course, anytime truly. your daughter is incredible.” he smiles at your mom, her eyes growing into hearts in an instant.

“you two have fun and be safe please.” she says, opening the front door for the two of you.

sis: use a condom, left some in your wallet ;)

you read the text aloud to matt when you got in the car, laughing at your sisters sudden approval.

“she gave you some? hell i already have some.” he laughs, backing out of your driveway.

“you know to this day, you’re the first of only three bodies that i have.”

“was i the best?”

“well i guess yeah?”

“what do you mean you guess?”

“i mean you were really the only one that paid any attention to my needs.”

“well of course, that’s extremely important to me.”

“then not i guess, you definitely were the best.”

“not were, are.” he winks, intertwining his fingers with yours in your lap.

the night was incredible. after the dance, your mom let matt come and stay over at your house, and you couldn’t believe it. he’d truly won your family over. you spent the whole night laid up in bed, kissing and touching and loving on each other for the first time since you were fifteen. everything felt the same, yet different. a mature kind of passion injected into the kisses you shared and the touches he laid on you. you would never trade his intimacy for the world. when you were with him, it’s like the world stopped spinning, and you were the last two people alive. he made your heart jump in the blink of an eye. you wanted him all along, even against your mothers wishes, and that’s something you’d never change.

“can i ask you something?” matt says as you laid contently on his bare chest.

“yes.” you reply leaning up to lock eyes with him.

“listen i know this is really really fast after this morning, and you can say no and i will understand either way but um, would you be my girlfriend?” he asks nervously and you giggle, locking your lips on his.

“yes, a million times.” you smile, speaking on his lips, reconnecting them after your brief words.

“you have no clue how long i’ve been trying to get to this point. it was hard with your mom and sister hating my guts. and you just got broken up with this morning.” he giggles.

“yeah well, i was gonna start hanging out with you again behind their backs if they didn’t start liking you. and, i’ve been wanting to be with you for years matt, nothing is too quick when it comes to you. nothing.”

-

2024

“matt.” you call out from the couch, adjusting your position trying to get comfy.

“yes my love.” he says running and sliding across the wood floor of his apartment.

“can you PLEASE get the pizza off the counter and bring it over here.” you beg.

“of course, you wanna watch a movie or something? maybe not do a whole lot of watching.” he says with a smug look on his face as he rounds the end of the couch, placing the box on the coffee table.

“how about we finish this box first and then we can talk….. or not talk.” you reply teasingly.

“i love you so much.” he smirks.

“i love you, matt.” you reply with a scrunched nose, pressing a short kiss to his lips as he got settled on the couch next to you.

over the course of the last 2 years, you’d grown inseparable, falling in love in a matter of weeks. he was there for everything. graduation and all. you hadn’t left his side since the night of your senior prom, and you fully planned on starting a life with him. which unbeknownst to him, this life you’d talked about had already begun.

“hey so, i actually had some news.” you start, finishing your slice.

“go on?” he mutters, shutting the box.

“well, fuck i wanted to make this like a big deal but i’m telling you before we fuck.” you sigh, realizing you should wait.

“no no, what is it, it’s okay baby.” he perks up, taking your hand in his.

“matt im pregnant.” you spit out, gritting your teeth waiting for a response.

“are you for real?” he says, his eyes widening, a quick nod following as a response. a huge smile grows on his cheeks as he practically jumps on you, squeezing you so tight you can hardly breathe.

“you’re carrying our baby. like our baby. wow. i can’t believe it. oh my god, i’m so lucky, i’m so excited wow. i love you so much y/n, you’re gonna be the best mom. i’ll make sure you have everything you need and so much more.” he says, his hands placed on your cheeks.

“thank you handsome, i’m glad you reacted well to that, i was nervous. thank you, i love you.” you reply hugging him back.

you were anxious to start this life with him, but you knew from the start all those years ago that you were taken care of.

ever since the day he approached you on the playground in third grade you knew he was never gonna leave you. never in a million years.

-

[joostsblog]

heyy i was wondering if you could write an angst to comfort joost fic where the reader is just like exhausted from everything and goes nonverbal bc theyre so tired and just frustrated and exhausted and joost gets worried when he hadnt heard from them in awhile so he goes to their house they break down in tears and he just comforts them?

Thanks for the request, I saw the opportunity to combine this request with another, I hope you don't mind! Here's the other request:

I hope the description of living with chronic pain is somewhat accurate 🫶🫶

cold tea ~ Joost Klein one shot

My masterlist here ✨💌

Pairing: Joost Klein x reader (with chronic pain)

Description: During a particular bad episode of chronic pain, Joost is worried about you and checks up on you as he hadn't heard from you in a while.

Word Count: 0.7k

A/N: Again, I hope the both of you don't mind that I combined these requests💌 requests still open although I can't promise too many as I'll be on vacation the next two weeks ☀️ if you liked it, you can show your support by leaving a reblog 🫶

Warnings: not proofread

You were curled up in bed, cuddling your teddy bear, eyes tightly shut as you tried everything in you to forget about the pain throughout your body. This week had been a series of really bad days for your chronic pain, barely getting any sleep at night and not being able to turn up to work. Your body was so tired you knew the only thing it wanted to do right now was just to fall asleep but the pain within it made it impossible. On top of that, you felt guilty for ignoring your boyfriend Joost. There were dozens of worried unanswered texts from him on your phone accompanied by ignored phone calls. But for the past few days, the pain and the mental load that came along with it was so bad that you couldn't muster up much strength to text him back.

You had only started dating a few weeks ago which meant that Joost didn't know much about your issues with chronic pain. You were worried that Joost would think that you were purposefully ignoring him because you wanted to break things off him with - which couldn't be further from the truth. You were head over heels for the sweet boy. You wanted to spend every waking moment with him, curled up in his arms, laughing and giggling with him.

He's probably angry with me for not answering, you thought to yourself.

The shrill sound of the doorbell shattered through your head. You sighed as you knew you had to get up. You had ordered some takeout since you didn't feel like cooking but you knew you had to feed your body. With a wince, you slowly sat up straight and made your way to the door. Your heart might as well have briefly stopped beating as you saw Joost stand outside your door.

"(Y/N)?" Joost asked timidly, a concerned look on his face. "Is everything alright?"

You wanted to speak but couldn't bring your mouth to form any words. Too exhausted but also too embarrassed to speak. Instead, your throat just felt dry and you could feel tears welling up in your eyes.

"Oh, (Y/N)," Joost whispered with a frown as he saw your tears. "Do you- can I-," you could tell that Joost didn't quite know what to do. So you just opened the door wider indicating for him to come in. "Can I hug you?" Joost asked softly as he stepped into your flat and you nodded. Joost very softly wrapped his arms around your body, very careful not to hurt you in any way. "Is it the pain?" he asked and you nodded against his chest. "Let me take care of you," Joost whispered against your hair as he pressed a soft kiss against your head. He led you back to your bedroom and softly tucked you in under the covers. "Be right back."

A few minutes later he appeared again with a cup of tea which he placed on the nightstand and got in bed next to you. Joost opened his arms and you nodded and he scooted closer to you and wrapped his arms around you carefully. For the first time in days, you could feel your body slowly relaxing. Joost started humming a soft melody and you could feel the exhaustion taking over your body slowly lulling you to sleep.

~

When you awoke, your head rested on Joost's lap, his hand softly caressing your head. He was reading an article on his phone and your heart fluttered as you caught a glimpse of the title: How to support a loved one with chronic pain.

Joost could feel you shift so he set down his phone and checked on you.

"Oh, you're awake," he smiled. "Your food came," he updated you. "And your tea went cold."

"Ice tea," you mumbled with a weak smile and Joost's eyes went wide with joy at finally hearing your voice again. Your body still felt sore but you were thankful that you were able to get at least a little bit of sleep.

"You're hungry?" Joost asked and you nodded. "I'll be right back," he said and got up before leaning down to you again to press a gentle kiss on your forehead. You smiled.

Your worries about Joost not being understanding or not having patience were completely forgotten. Instead, you felt cared for and loved by him. You smiled at him as he entered the room with the Thai curry you had ordered.

"Thank you," you said, your voice still slightly straining. "I love you."

Joost smiled fondly at you before he pressed another kiss to your head.

"I love you too, liefde."

[starsenha]

[10] FIRST IMPRESSIONS - progress

synopsis: riki was a big fan of your group Devilish, but when he met you for the first time, he made a very bad first impression and now you hated him. rumors started to spark saying how you hated each other and to calm the rumors, the company decided to make you two hosts a variety show together for two months. wc: 1,3k

The third episode of the variety show had been the longest filming day yet, and honestly, you couldn't take it anymore. You and Riki had spent hours interviewing Meovv, a newly debuted girl group that came to promote their first comeback. The group's members were bright and bubbly, but their energy exhausted you, as well ad the fake smile you had plastered on your face.

You sat across from them, maintaining your polite and attentive demeanor. Riki was also struggling with their energy. As soon as the director yelled, "That's a wrap," you stood, thanked the staff and the Meovv members with a small bow, and quietly slipped out of the studio. Riki noticed but decided not to say anything, choosing to stay back and what with some of the crew.

Behind the studio, you found a quiet corner surrounded by tall trees where you could feel the cool evening air. Sighing, you leaned against the wall, your head tilted back as you closed your eyes. You loved what you did, but sometimes, it took just too much energy.

About ten minutes later, you heard footsteps. Opening your eyes, you found Riki standing a few feet away, hands stuffed in his hoodie pockets.

"Figured I'd find you here," he said causally.

"You followed me?" you raised an eyebrow.

"Followed is a strong word. I just....guessed," he said with a sheepish grin. "You looked like you needed a break."

You turned your gaze back to the darkening sky. "It's been a long day."

He leaned against the wall next to you but was careful to give you space. "Yeah, those girls have endless energy. I don't know how they do it."

"They're probably running on adrenaline," you said, your tone soft. "They're still new. Everything's exciting for them."

Riki nodded. "True. But I don't think I've ever been that energetic, even when I debuted."

That earned a small huff of amusement from you, which surprised Riki, but he decided not to comment on it and thought it was the moment.

"Can...Can we talk for a bit?" he asked, shifting his weight from one foot to the other.

You sighed a bit, "Sure, sunbaenim."

He winced at the formality but didn't comment on it. Instead, he took a step closer. "I just...wanted to talk. About, uh, stuff."

"Stuff?"

"Yeah, like..." he scratched the back of his neck, clearly struggling to find the right words. "Like how you probably don't like me very much."

You didn't respond immediately. "I wouldn't say that, sunbaenim. I respect you as an artist and as my senior."

"Okay, but like," Riki said, his voice almost pleading, "you definitely don't like me. And i get why. I've been...kind of a disaster." You didn't deny it, which made Riki laugh quietly. “But, uh, I think part of the reason you don’t like me goes back to that first time we met. At the music show.”

Your eyes narrowed slightly, but your tone remained neutral. "What about it?"

"You remember, right?" Riki asked, glancing at you. "It was, like, two years ago. Your group had just debuted."

You nodded slowly, your gaze turning to the dark sky. "You told me I was an 'okay' dancer." Your voice was calm, almost sounding unbothered.

He winced at your words. "Yeah. That. I...I didn't mean it like that," he said quickly, his words stumbling over each other. "I swear. I dodn't think you were just 'okay'. I thought you were amazing. I just-"

“Then why did you say it?” you interrupted, your tone sharper now. “If you thought I was amazing, why didn’t you say that?”

Riki ran a hand through his hair, his nervous energy making him shift again. “Because I was nervous! Like, really nervous. I was a fan, and I was so freaked out about meeting you that I just… messed it up. I didn’t know how to act, so I said something stupid.”

You turned to face him fully, your arms still crossed. “You were nervous?”

“Yes!” Riki said, nodding emphatically. “I mean, you were—are—this incredible dancer, and I didn’t want to sound like I was just fanboying. I wanted to look cool, but instead of being cool, I made it worse and came off as a jerk.”

You stared at him for a moment, your expression softening ever so slightly. “So, you didn’t mean it?”

“Not even a little bit,” Riki admitted. “You’re one of the most talented dancers I’ve ever seen, and I’ve thought that since day one. I just… suck at expressing myself sometimes.”

You were silent for a moment, your gaze searching his face for any sign of insincerity. When you finally spoke, your tone was quieter. “Why are you telling me this now, sunbaenim?”

“Because we’re stuck working together for seven weeks,” Riki said with a small, self-deprecating laugh. “And I don’t want you to hate me the whole time. I’d like for us to at least get along. Or, you know, tolerate each other.”

“Thank you for explaining,” You said finally, your tone softer but still measured. “I… appreciate the clarification.”

“You’re welcome,” Riki replied, grinning slightly. “Does this mean I’ve earned a little less of the death glare on set?”

You raised an eyebrow, but there was a glint of amusement in your eyes. “Don’t push your luck.”

Riki chuckled, running a hand through his hair. “Noted. But, seriously, I’m glad we talked. I was starting to think you had me on some kind of blacklist.”

You tilted your head slightly, pretending to think. “I wouldn’t call it a blacklist. More like… a warning list.”

“Wow,” Riki said, clutching his chest dramatically. “And here I thought I was climbing my way into your good graces.”

“You’re at the bottom of the list,” You replied coolly, though your lips twitched as if suppressing a smile.

Riki leaned back against the wall, looking up at the sky. “You know, this reminds me of something.”

“What?” You asked, curious despite yourself.

“Well,” he began, a mischievous grin forming, “it’s like one of those rom-coms where the leads start off hating each other, but then they end up being best friends—or more.”

You stared at him, your expression deadpan. “This isn’t a rom-com, Riki-sunbae.”

“Riki,” he corrected, glancing at her hopefully. “Just Riki.”

You didn’t respond immediately, and he continued, trying to break the silence. “Besides, if this were a rom-com, I’d have some dramatic rain scene to win you over, and I left my umbrella at home.”

You blinked at him for a moment, and then, to both your surprise, you laughed. It wasn’t just a small chuckle but a genuine laugh that lit up your face for a brief moment.

Riki froze, his eyes wide as he stared at you. “Wait… did you just laugh? Like, actually laugh?”

Your laughter trailed off, and you looked almost as surprised as he did. “What? No. That wasn’t—”

“No, no, you totally laughed,” Riki said, pointing at you triumphantly. “I made Yn laugh. Someone call Dispatch. This is breaking news.”

You rolled her eyes, but the corner of your mouth twitched upward again. “Don’t let it go to your head, Riki.”

“Hey, you called me Riki. No ‘sunbaenim.’ Progress!”

You blinked, realizing your slip. “It was a momentary lapse. Don’t get used to it.”

“Too late,” Riki said, beaming. “You’ve already made my day.”

You sighed but didn’t correct yourself, your tone more teasing than annoyed. “You’re so easily pleased.”

“Only when it comes to you,” Riki replied, his tone light but sincere.

You glanced at him, your expression softening for just a moment before you pushed off the wall. “We should head back. It’s getting late.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Riki said, following you but unable to hide the triumphant grin on his face. “Just don’t trip on the way. I’m not catching you again today.”

You gave him a side-eye that was more amused than annoyed. “You’re really pushing it.”

“Maybe,” Riki said, walking beside you. “But I think I’m finally getting somewhere.”

previous / m.list / next

TAGLIST: @pkjay @d-dilemma @heartheejake @lunaritex @dreeki @inishij @rikirritated @whoiss4m @sleepyxxhead @aanniikkaa @right-person-wrong-time @aespaqq @starry-eyed-bimbo @nerdywitchcrown @yuniesluv @lovestruck-sky @ariluvssssss100 @rei4sunoo @wildtigerlili @jakef3ver @seungminsapuppy @kittsnewera @regalfox @rairaiblog @pairinnn

[bird-inacage]

The Heart Killers EP4: Is Bison Playing Dumb?

Before the series aired, I did wonder if we were going to get a Mr and Mrs Smith type scenario at some point. The 'I know that you know that I know' type mind game which goes both ways, where both parties are pretending to be none the wiser until the time is right.

Up until Episode 4, Bison had some reservations but there was some ambiguity in regards to how much he bought into Kant's attentions and believed his own words in Kant's defence. Since being poisoned, Bison's gut instinct is louder than ever before. Paired with Fadel's reproachful reasoning and the evidence against Kant is mounting up so fast that Bison's excuses cannot deter the warning signs anymore.

So when Bison goes to 'confront' Kant with a pocketknife in hand, he's on a mission of his own. Despite what this implies, he not going on the immediate offence. He plans to put Kant on trial. He's going to do this his way, not how Fadel expects him to.

Now Kant is a pretty terrible liar as far as liars go. When Bison closely scrutinises his every move under an accusatory gaze rather than one of just slight suspicion, Kant visibly buckles under the pressure. It requires him to lie in a much more overt, blatant and upfront manner, which he stumbles through under Bison's unrelenting spotlight. Later on Bison directly asks him, "You're not hiding anything else from me, are you?" You could read this as Bison re-assessing whether he can afford to give Kant another chance, but to me it felt like Bison was almost tempting Kant to lie to his face. He already knows Kant has not been completely truthful. What he may be re-affirming is the extent to which Kant is choosing to continue lying to him. 'You must know that I'm onto you, why are you still keeping up the pretence?'

Every time he questions Kant, it's an invitation to come clean; to drop the act, to fess up or slip up. When he presses, he's testing to see if Kant will forfeit the information himself, but he continues to dodge, swerve and deflect. And actually, it's no coincidence that their first ever interaction plays out on very similar footing. Kant initially flirts with Bison under a guise of bravado. When Bison doesn't buy into it because he dislikes the façade, Kant changes tack and goes for a candid approach. That's when Bison gives him a chance, and his smile says 'See, why didn't you just start with that to begin with?'

Unsurprisingly, it's when Kant 'drops the act' that Bison wavers because he detects genuine sincerity. Even if Bison is harbouring anger, he's also acknowledging that Kant hasn't lied about absolutely everything. And that's enough to maintain a small concession. Based on next week's preview, I wonder if Bison intends to play into Kant's guilt to see whether that prompts him to redeem himself.

After all, Kant is also a prisoner of his circumstances (though Bison doesn't yet know the full context). "I saw it with my own eyes. Kant was just trying to get away from his bad past." On an unconscious level, he feels a kinship with such a predicament, which is why he's biding his time. He's decided to continue the charade and call Kant's bluff by agreeing to be his boyfriend, to see just how far Kant plans to take this by giving him what he wants. A 'keep your friends close and your enemies closer' strategy, mirroring how Kant is equally digging for intel on him by getting up close. Why are you doing this? What's in it for you? What exactly is your motive? Where do the lies start and end? How much of what you feel for me is true, if any of it?

Bison's undecided. He's human after all and not immune to Kant's charms (which funnily enough is the same problem Fadel's currently having with Style). Every time Kant refers to him as his boyfriend, you can see Bison's heart flutter. The attraction between the two is undeniably there and that will still colour his judgement.

In the meantime, Bison appears to be mentally cataloguing every transgression and forming his judgement slowly on whether Kant will deserve punishment or vindication.

You can keep tabs on bird-inacage’s BL meta directory for my other long-form posts around The Heart Killers, which I’ll be updating in real time as the show airs.

[t4tlottie]

a summer place — LOTTIE MATTHEWS

— summary: repost since season 3 is nxt week🥸 an episodic fic of being with lottie in the wilderness. literally follows all the episodes of season 1.

— wordcount: 7,687

The loud hum in the airplane does little to soothe your nerves. You already took the Valium that Lottie gave you in the airport bathroom and it does nothing but make you feel even more like jelly.

Weak and sick.

"Do you want me to take your headphones out?" Lottie's voice sends you back to reality, and you wipe your sweaty palms on your pants while nodding at her. You watch her unzip her bag and fish for your Walkman, huffing as she tries to untangle the cord. "Ugh, here, you do it." she plops the device on your lap, and you smile slightly at her frustration, expertly untangling the wire in seconds.

You put them on and press play on the tape, reaching over to hold Lottie's hand as you hear the music start to play. She rubs comforting circles on your skin, and soon enough, the music lulls you to sleep.

When you come back into consciousness, you assume the screaming you hear is from your music, since it's right in your ears. You blink your eyes open and the horror that greets you feels like a bad dream. Lottie's teammates are screaming and some of them tumble out of their seats and into the aisle, reaching out for something to hold onto as the plane accelerates downward. You watch as Coke and paper cups roll to the pit, and your mouth suddenly goes dry. Your headphones are tugged off so fast that you get whiplash, and you look over to see Lottie panicking and fumbling with the oxygen mask before she puts it on you.

Hers goes on next, and you don't even know you were crying until Lottie wipes your tears and holds you close to her. It hits you all at once, and she tries her best to shush your wails and shaking body while trying to calm her own breathing. You try to focus on the way her fuzzy coat feels as you grip her body or the way her hair tickles your neck, but it just makes you even more aware of what's happening.

You pass out before the plane even crashes.

You flew from her arms the second the plane crashed, and that was the last she saw of you. She doesn't even know if you made it out. She doesn't even know how she made it out. It was like a blip in time - one second, she was bracing for impact, and the next she was suddenly outside. She spots Jackie and Shauna tumble out of the plane, but before she can go up to ask if they've seen you, the plane blows up. The impact isn't nearly big enough to even reach her, but she still feels the heat from the blast. Or maybe it's the cold sweat dripping down her back as she thinks of you still being inside.

"Have you seen Van?!"

Lottie barely registers Taissa shouting in her ear before she stumbles away, trying her best to focus her eyes so maybe she can see you lying on the ground somewhere. It doesn't work though - the debris of everything and the tears that she can feel forming blur her vision. But suddenly, she hears a muffled cry that sounds sort of like you yelling out for help. She yells for your name, rushing towards where she thinks the sound is coming from.

"Lottie!" you wail, and she spots you trapped underneath a plane seat. She nearly trips on her feet as she runs towards you, and her knees scrape against the twigs and rocks as she slides from kneeling down so fast. "Holy fuck, please, get this off me! It's on my hand, Lottie, please!" your one arm that you can use does nothing to help as you try to lift the seat off of your body, and you thrash around wildly.

At the sound of your panicked voice and the sight of seeing you hurt, a surge of adrenaline flows through her. She inhales hard and effortlessly pushes the seat off of you in one go, grabbing you and holding you close to her. "You're okay, you're okay." she repeats, patting your hair down and shushing your cries. "Let me see your hand."

You show it to her and she nearly retches at the sight of how bloody and mangled it is. It looks like some of your nails are hanging on by a thread and you'll definitely have some gnarly bruising but she doesn't think it's broken. "L-let's get it cleaned up." she swallows down a lump in her throat and helps you up.

She throws your good arm around her shoulder and walks you over to where the injured girls are gathered and sets you down against a tree. She tells you to wait and kisses your forehead before she leaves, on the hunt for her suitcase where she knows she has some bandages.

Thank God for you and for taking care of her injuries after soccer matches.

Lottie told you to wait by the campfire while she goes looking for something in her suitcase, but you're freezing fucking cold, and you know she has to have packed at least one of your jackets since she steals like half of them anyway. You struggle to get up, and you thank Van who helps you and even offers you one of their CornNuts, which you gratefully take.

"Lot?" you walk up behind her, and she makes a yelping noise from closing her pink box too fast and accidentally pinches her finger. She prays to God that you didn't see her take her pills and turns around to smile slightly at you. "Yeah?" she says weakly, getting up and brushing the dirt from her knees.

"Did you really tell me to wait so you could sneak a bite to eat? Couldn't even share?" you tease, hugging yourself as you shiver from the cold. Lottie lets out a sigh of relief that sounds like a nervous laugh to you, looking around as she plays with her dress. "I was just gonna ask if I could borrow a jacket since I can't find my suitcase."

"Oh, sure. I think I have your gray one in here anyways." she says, and you chuckle as she bends down and opens her suitcase to fish for it. Once she pulls it out and helps you into it, she makes sure to be careful of your injured hand. As she zips it back up, Lottie kisses your lips softly and rubs her thumb against your chin.

You tangle your hand in her hair for a moment before she pulls away with a shy giggle. She licks her lips and messes with the strings of your hoodie, giving your nose another kiss before taking your hand. "It feels like I haven't kissed you in forever." she chuckles, leading you back to the campfire. She helps you sit down before plopping down next to you, her thigh pressed flat against yours. You take the blanket that Shauna hands you and drape it over Lottie's shoulders, holding her hand underneath.

The second Laura Lee utters the word "cunt", you have to bite your lip to keep from a cackle from coming out, but Van breaks first and the rest follow suit. You look around at all the girls laughing and it feels like you're having a normal campfire instead of having been in a plane crash hours before. It feels nice.

After the girls go around confessing their secrets that definitely caused the plane crash, you all head to bed. Or at least try to. You can't sleep even though you're exhausted, the pain in your hand keeps throbbing uncomfortably. You give up and open your eyes, staring at Lottie's face.

You look at her perfect nose and her lips that still have her lip gloss coated on them. You watch how her brows furrow as she dreams of something good, you hope. Your staring must've been too intense because a few moments later she opens her eyes.

"You're still awake?" she mumbles sleepily, trying to adjust her eyes. She groans and rubs her eyes lazily while moving to rest her head on your chest, throwing her arm over your waist and hugging you tightly.

"Hand hurts too much to sleep."

She hums and starts rubbing your stomach which makes you purr. You kiss her forehead and breathe in her perfume that still lingers, trying your best to empty your head and close your eyes so you can sleep.

"You were never even supposed to come with us. You're not even on the team." you hear her whisper, squeezing her closer to you. You hear blame and guilt in her voice and shake your head lazily, grabbing her cheek and stroking it softly. "I wanted to come. It's not your fault. Besides, I'd be all the way back home worried as hell and eating myself alive wondering where you are. I'm glad I'm with you."

"Then it's settled. Grab your shit."

Lottie huffs slightly at Tai's words, and you sheepishly scratch your neck as she drops her arms in annoyance and reaches for her suitcase and bag. You grab your stuff and offer to carry Lottie's suitcase for her. It's the least you can do, you know, to win her back over. No doubt she's irritated at you.

"Why didn't you side with me?" she pulls you aside a bit from the line you guys are walking in.

"I just went with my instinct, I dunno." you mumble, knocking your shoulder into hers as you try to avoid catching your feet under any roots. "Besides, it's a lake and I feel all gross and grimy. I need to wash off." you joke.

You walk for what seems like forever. Your legs hurt and the backpack adds extra weight to your back which doesn't help. There's sweat dripping down your back and neck and places you didn't even know could sweat like that. Grunting, you roll your neck and try to power through, tugging Lottie's suitcase behind you.

"Need me to carry you, my dear?" Lottie teases, leaning in close and snickering despite having the same struggles as you. Her legs feel like they're gonna fall off any second now.

"What do you keep in this stupid suitcase? Rocks? Why is it so fucking heavy?" you groan.

"Oh, shit. Oh, hell yeah, bitches!" you hear Van yell and look up to see them jumping up and pointing erratically, and you know they've spotted the lake.

The words make an instant smile appear on your face, and suddenly nothing feels heavy or tiring anymore. You easily run with Lottie towards the water and toss your belongings carelessly to the side, sighing a breath of relief. You watch Lottie lift off her blue-collar shirt while you struggle to even kick off your shoes.

"Let me help you, you dork." she snorts, unbuttoning your shirt and helping you out of it. While she does that, you reach down and use one hand to unbuckle your belt, Lottie helping you with the rest and tugging them down. "There. Now, c'mon."

She grabs your good hand and leads you towards the water, and you feel yourself shrivel up at the coldness as it first touches your toes. You let go of her hand once the water reaches your midsection, and she looks at you with a frown.

"Probably shouldn't get my hand wet. I don't want it to get infected." you say, feeling a bit disappointed that you can't swim with her. You flash her your best smile and lean down to splash her, holding your hands up in surrender as she gives you a stern look. "I'll just stay here for now. Go ahead." you nod at the other girls who float and play in the water.

Lottie kisses you quickly before running the rest of the way in and diving under the water, looking like a mermaid as she resurfaces and waves at you. You grin and wave back, watching her play with her teammates.

You look around and decide to walk near where Jackie, Mari, and Nat are. You catch the end of Mari thirsting over Travis and scoff lightly, looking back behind and rolling your eyes.

Mari catches your eye, and you look away before she can say something back to you. She eyes you up and down though, whispering to Jackie. "If they weren't with Lottie, I'd totally hit."

You smile as you see the cabin, running up and looking through the dusty window for anyone in sight. You bump heads with Shauna as you turn to look at each other.

"I don't see anyone in there." Akilah comments, and you hear Jackie and her banging on the door.

"Me either," you respond, backing away as they look around for any sign of life. You feel someone missing, and you turn around to see Lottie holding onto her backpack straps tightly and making a stink face at the cabin, which she makes sure she's far from. "Lott?"

Walking over to her, you feel something dark settle in the pit of your stomach. She looks off - like she's genuinely afraid of something and it makes you nervous. You reach out to touch her shoulder, and it seems to snap her out of whatever daze she was in momentarily. As she looks at you, she still looks scared though, and you loop your arm around hers before walking back to the cabin. You feel her feet resist for a moment but eventually, she drags them against the ground, staying close to you.

Your heart sinks as you look at how grimy and abandoned the cabin looks as you enter. There hasn't been anyone living here in years. Probably even decades. Lottie still lingers by the door as you let go of her arm and walk in, and you throw your bag on the crappy couch as you look around.

"Don't worry, guys. We might be stuck in the middle of nowhere, but, hey, at least there's porn!" Van says cheerfully, showing off the porno mag to everyone.

Curiously, you walk over to the table where Van slams the mags down, but Lottie pulls you back by your shirt, glaring at you. Oh, now she wants to come in, you think.

"I wasn't gonna look," you mutter defensively.

Night falls and you toss and turn in your sleep, your mind not letting you forget what Lottie found up in the attic. Or why she was even up there in the first place. You had fallen asleep the second you all laid down blankets and mattresses, and you think you heard Lottie mumble something about going outside to try to pee. The next thing you know, you hear Tai scream, and she comes down saying something about a dead body and Lottie in the attic.

You had panicked, of course, assuming she was saying it was Lottie's dead body or something, but she came down the attic stairs looking sheepish and hugging herself. You ran straight up to her, asking if she was okay, and led her back to bed while some of the girls went out to bury the poor guy's bones since that's all he was.

You open your eyes only to be greeted with a face full of Lottie's pink sweater. You furrow your brow as you look up to see her sitting up and staring at something. Again, you feel that same feeling in your stomach from earlier as you get up and whisper to her.

"Lottie? It's okay. They buried him, he's gone." you glance up at the attic hatch that's still open, some moonlight peeking through. It gives you the shivers, and you subconsciously scoot closer to Lottie.

"I think bad things happened here," she says, and it doesn't do anything to calm your nerves. She lays back down and you glance one more time at the attic before cuddling up with her again, making sure you fall asleep after you hear her breathing get steady.

Hand in hand, you and Lottie stroll together through the forest. You helped her and Van put up the tin cans as the others took turns seeing who had the best shot earlier, and now you just needed to be alone with her after all that noise.

"Why didn't you shoot with them? You were the only one besides Travis and Nat who passed the coin test," she asks, stopping near a tree and leaning against it.

You place your hands on her waist and shrug. "I dunno. Feel like I only did good to impress you anyways." you grin, kissing her lips. "Besides, can you imagine me with a gun and, like, killing animals?"

"I think it would be hot." she giggles, draping her arms around your neck and tugging softly at your baby hairs. You lick your lips and smirk, raising your eyebrows at her. You bring your lips to her cheek and begin kissing down to her neck.

"Oh, yeah?" you tease, making her grip your hair harder at the sound of your low voice. She nods against your lips and melts into your touch, one of her hands sneaking under your shirt to paw at your chest. You push her flat against the tree once you hear a moan slip out and reach down to play with the waistband of her shorts. "Can I?"

She unbuttons them for you almost immediately and impatiently, shaking them down to her ankles and making your hand cup her clothed pussy. "Please. God, I need you," she whispers, letting out a whine as you slowly begin rubbing.

The sound makes you flush and your knees go weak. You stare intently at her face as you insert a finger inside of her, watching her lean her head back and close her eyes, her mouth agape as you are scissoring your fingers inside of her. Leaning in to kiss her, she grabs the back of your head and shoves her tongue inside your mouth. You pant as you feel her hump your hand, and a third finger easily slides in.

"I'm so close, don't stop, don't stop, don't stop." she babbles, her tongue lolling out as you suck marks into her neck. She can feel a white-hot burn in her belly and can't stop the incessant moans and whines that fly out of her mouth.

You hold her hips against the tree with one hand while you pound your fingers into her cunt, whispering for her to let go and cum for you. She releases with a bite to your neck and a long groan, hips stuttering as she comes down from her high. Slowly, you pull your fingers out and bring them to your lips for a taste. Her eyes are half-lidded when she looks at you and you smirk, making sure you've sucked all her juices off before kissing her.

She moans into your mouth, gripping your jaw so she can start sucking on your tongue. Reluctantly, you push her away and grin even wider as you get down on your knees. "You know, I think I could survive out here if this is what I'm eating every day."

You glance questionably towards Lottie as she looks back towards the window and squeeze her hand as you feel her tense up. Before you can ask what's wrong, her blood-curdling scream makes your heart sink, and you jump in fear.

As the window flies open on its own, you let go of her hand and scoot back. Your knees scrape against the rotten floor as you crawl back towards her and grab her shoulders. "Lottie? What's wrong?" you feel panic settle in your stomach as she begins to hyperventilate.

Shauna grabs the matches and lights the candles again, and the dim light makes Lottie's face light up in fear. Literally. You've never seen her look this way let alone act it, and it's almost like her face is scrunched up and distorted like she's possessed.

"Guys, something's really wrong with her." you hear Van say.

"You think?!" you yell, trying to hold Lottie still as she rocks herself back and forth. She groans and her nails dig painfully into your palm. You're frozen and don't know what to do, so all you do is rub her back and pray that she'll calm down soon.

"It wants!" she shouts.

"Lottie, baby, what is it?" you ask, cupping her face and rubbing your thumb on her cheek. "Tell us."

"Hungry. Hungry." she babbles, pushing your hand off her and cackling darkly. You frown as she starts shushing and grabs Shauna's hand. "It's in you already. And you." she turns to you again, making you gulp with fear as you lock eyes with her.

"Lottie knock it off. This isn't a game." Taissa says sternly, and she breaks eye contact with you to stare at the ceiling.

As she starts speaking French, you think your ears might be deceiving you. She's the worst in French class, how the fuck is she speaking it fluently right now?! You just stare in shock as you drown out the girls yelling about Jackie sucking at French and watch how Lottie seems to get pale as she continues speaking in tongues.

"Uh...blood? I think she's saying 'blood.'" Jackie's voice seeps into your consciousness and everyone's voices are loud again as you watch Lottie suddenly get up.

Akilah holds your arm back as you try to follow Lottie to the window, shaking her head in an attempt to get you to stay back from Lottie's episode.

"You must spill blood. Or else." she pants, leaning against the window like she's in pain.

"Or else what, Lottie?" you question, noticing her breathing getting more erratic. You get a bad feeling in your stomach. "Lottie, what are you-"

You watch with horror as she smashes her face into the window and scream, immediately rushing to her side. She wipes the blood off her forehead and begins to wail, and you help her sink down to her knees as you try to make sense of what the fuck is going on with your girlfriend.

"Lottie? Lottie, what the hell, are you okay?"

You don't even notice or hear Laura Lee walking in with her bible until she throws it at Lottie, and you quickly glare at her before comforting Lottie again. She gingerly wipes blood off her nose and looks at you, and her lips tremble as you raise her chin so you can use the sleeve of your shirt to wipe the rest off.

—

The cotton Band-Aid is placed on Lottie's forehead gently, and you feel bad for thinking how cute she looks as she pouts. You grab her cheeks and kiss the top of her head once you're done, placing your hand over hers. "Tell me if it hurts and I'll shake some more Aspirin out of Misty, okay?"

You smile as you get a laugh out of her and kiss her cheek, taking her hand and helping her off the table. You lead her back to the sofa and get her under the covers, getting in behind her and wrapping your arms around her waist. She reaches behind and pulls you in closer until you're flat against her, holding your hand against her stomach.

"What did you mean when you said it was in me too?" you mumble.

Lottie shrugs, playing with your fingers as she frowns. She doesn't even remember saying that. Doesn't even remember smashing her head against the window either.

"I don't know. I just wanna sleep," she says after a moment of silence.

"You saw Tai eating dirt last night?" you're in disbelief, looking at Lottie with a confused expression. "Wait, when was this?" you don't remember her leaving the bed.

"I heard a noise last night and went to check it out."

"Are you sure it wasn't just a dream? I don't know Taissa's personal tastes, but I don't think she'd resort to eating dirt," you say, frowning when you see her face fall slightly.

"I don't know. Maybe," she mumbles, hugging the side of her arm.

"I just feel like there's something else you're not telling me." you shrug, sitting down on one of the logs and looking up at her. She tenses up a bit, avoiding your eyes and shifting her weight on her feet. "You have been acting kinda off lately. You can tell me anything, you know."

Lottie feels her mouth go dry at your words. She knows she should just tell you about her meds, but can't she bring herself to open her mouth. There's a little part of her that still thinks you'd leave her if she told you about her diagnosis. She feels weak in the knees at the thought and sits down next to you.

"I think I'm seeing things." she sighs, bouncing her leg relentlessly. "And I don't know if they're real or not."

"Seeing things like what? Like, a shadow out of the corner of your eye or...?"

"Like seeing a deer with bloody antlers that nobody else saw type of things." she swallows hard, not bringing herself to face you in case you're looking at her like she's crazy.

"Maybe it's just stress related?" you propose. You've been out here for you don't know how many months, but it's been a while, and it's only natural that the body starts to cope however it can, right? You furrow your brow at the thought - maybe those voices you hear at night should be concerning...

"You don't believe me?" she finally turns to you, looking at you with a hurt expression. Her doe eyes are on full display, and you shake your head, holding her hand in yours.

"I believe you." you kiss her knuckles and scoot in closer to her. She feels a huge relief at your words. "Maybe you could go to Laura Lee? She'd probably know what to say better than I could. Maybe she could help you with your problem - give you some spiritual advice or something?"

Lottie nods and smiles at you, leaning her head to rest on your shoulder. She runs her hands along the length of your arm and gently digs her nails into your skin as she thinks about it. It's not the worst idea - in fact, she was thinking of already asking her about it, but she wanted to go to you first.

"I'll ask her. Come with me?"

"Maybe you should go alone. I already told Akilah I'd help her with finding some berries that we can all eat anyway. Tell me how it goes though?" you get up, holding your arms out for her to take. You pull her in for a kiss and wish her luck and watch her disappear into the cabin before you head out to find Akilah.

—

"I don't think you should go with Taissa and the others." Lottie pleads, begging for you to listen as you pack your things. "You know there's nothing out there."

"Why? Think you'll miss me too much if I go?" you tease, and you stop packing when you see how distressed she looks.

"I... I had a dream. I saw a river of blood and red smoke. I just don't want you to get hurt. Please, stay with me."

"You know I believe you, right? About your... visions. But Laura Lee has you thinking you're some type of prophet, Lottie." you sigh. Maybe getting her to go to Laura Lee was a mistake. She baptized her for Christ's sake. You've tried to think rationally about it - you know Laura Lee had good intentions but still. But at least Lottie feels better about the whole situation you guess. "Do you really want me to stay?"

She nods and pouts at you. You give in and start taking your things out of the bag, and you see her shoulders visibly relax. As you take out your clothes, she wraps her arm around your waist and pulls you in for a bone-crushing hug, kissing your cheek repeatedly. "Thank you."

You walk up to Lottie with one of the flowers you picked out while looking around for crafts. "Will you... go to doomcoming with me?" you ask, holding your breath. It comes out as a big snort when she breaks and rolls her eyes, pushing your shoulder softly before she takes the flower.

"Of course. But I was gonna ask you." she mumbles, sniffing the flower before tucking your hair behind your ear. She places the flower in your hair, rubbing her thumbs along your cheek. "You can still ask me." you reply, pulling her in by her waist and waiting expectantly.

You see her blush a little and smirk, and she reaches down to the crafts table and picks up two wooden pieces, and hands one to you. It's carved into a deer's antler held together by flowers and stems, almost resembling a keychain of some sort. Her piece is the same but a little bigger. They're matching.

"I made this for you. For us. Kinda like puzzle pieces, I guess. But, uh, I was gonna give it to you when I asked so... Go to doomcoming with me?" she asks shyly, her brown eyes sparkling with shyness.

"Hmm... I dunno." you pretend to contemplate it, wincing when she shoves your shoulder. You pout and rub the sting but smile at her, leaning in to kiss her cheek. "I'd be honored to go to doomcoming with you, Lott."

—

Waiting impatiently behind the 'party' string the girls made, you hear Javi clanging against the scrap metal which signals the start of doomcoming. You slowly enter through, feeling nervous as you pat down your dress shirt and fix your hair. You wanna look good for Lottie since you two didn't see each other as you were getting ready, both wanting it to be a surprise. The second you spot her the breath gets knocked out of your lungs - she looks so beautiful. Like a goddess with that antler crown of hers. You can't help the gummy smile that breaks out as you two lock eyes, and you sheepishly shuffle over to her.

"You look really good. Laura Lee would be honored." you tell her, softly running your hands over the dress. She gives you a sad smile before pulling you in for a kiss, and you feel her put something light on your head. You pull back confused before reaching up and touching a crown made of sticks.

"It's like mine," she says, leaning her head down and touching her crown with yours. You giggle at her antics and bring her in for another kiss. "You're so cute," you mumble against her lips.

"Come get another drink with me." she leads you over to the jar of berries and pours you a generous amount, taking a tiny sip before handing it to you. You grimace as you swallow it down, hating the tiny chunks still left in there.

You drink 2 cups of it nonetheless - you're not about to miss out on free booze out here. No way. You also have some of that broth with her, letting her spoon-feed it to you as it drips down the side of your mouth.

—

"What we need is a slow dance." Misty cheers, and you catch the way Coach tries to cover his grimace. But you agree - maybe just because you really want to dance with Lottie and feel normal for a second again. But it's a nice thought.

Smiling at Lottie humming, you nod your head along to the sound of her voice. Taissa breaks out in song and the rest of the girls sing along, making you snort as you watch her dance with Van. This gets the other girls going and they prance around with each other, and you feel Lottie grab you by the hand and tug you into her body. "Dance with me?"

You groan and flush in embarrassment as she sways your arms to the beat of her humming and hide your face in her neck. Your hands fly to her waist, and you lick your lips while staring at her, thinking she looks amazing with the slight stain of the berries on her mouth and the way her eyes are half-lidded as she looks at you. The booze suddenly hits you, and you try to blink away your blurry vision. The more you dance around with Lottie, the more your stomach twists, and you gently push away from her.

"Maybe we should sit down. Feel funny..." you slur, leading her over by a mossy tree log and collapsing by it. She sits down next to you and plays with your fingers, bringing it up close to your face as if to inspect them.

You don't know how you ended up away from Lottie, but when you open your eyes again, it's dark. You're a few feet away and slumped against a tree while watching her sway as she kneels on the ground. You giggle at her movements and attempt to get up but you're too drunk and woozy. She turns around at the sound of your voice and smiles with a loopy grin, crawling over to you.

She gets on your lap and breathes hotly into your ear, her hands roaming over your body. "It's hungry." Your eyes close shut at the feeling and you moan softly as she begins peppering desperate kisses along your cheek and neck. She lifts herself up for a brief moment to move her dress out of the way, and you feel the fabric of her panties against your thigh.

Her hands push you more against the tree as she humps you wildly, and you only remember that the others are still there when she reaches down and cups your center. Your eyes fly open, and you try to hold her hips still but she growls at you, squeezing your wrists and slamming them against your sides.

"Lottie, not here," you whine, mouth hanging open as her knee slips between your legs and rubs against your pussy. She squeezes her legs around yours as she continues humping your thigh, and your brows furrow when you feel her bite your neck. Like, really bite it. Almost like she's trying to rip off your jugular.

She shushes you as you squirm, biting down hard enough to draw blood. Your cry is immediately silenced by her lips as she slams them against yours, and her hands begin undoing your dress shirt. She only gets a couple of buttons undone before you're pushing her off, stumbling as you try to regain your balance.

You don't know why, but your feet feel the need to get away from here. From Lottie. So, you start running. You rush into the forest without looking back and try to see in front of you as the night sky barely illuminates the forest.

"The stag is getting away. Get it." Lottie yells to the girls, getting up in a hurry and rushing after you. The girls follow along, and Shauna grabs a knife from the ground used for cutting the fabric earlier before catching up.

The eerie sound of them whooping and howling behind you makes you sweat with terror, the adrenaline only doing so much to keep you further from them. Your legs burn the faster you run but you force yourself to keep going. You quickly look behind to see some of them carrying weapons, and that fatal mistake causes you to trip and fall on a tree root. Your shoulder slams down into the dirt and while trying to ignore the pain, you kick your legs and scoot back as Lottie practically throws herself on you.

"Got you, little one."

—

You stare stupidly at Lottie as she puts on what you can only describe as some sort of antler headpiece. Drool drips down as your mouth hangs open, and you grunt as Mari grips your jaw roughly as Lottie shoves a pinecone in your mouth.

"Shh..." she whispers, rubbing your cheek with her hand as you struggle. "Stop fighting."

Her voice is mean and demanding, and you flinch back at her harsh tone. She looks back towards Shauna with the knife and steps away, letting her get close to you. Your heart sinks as Shauna brings the knife up to your neck, and you desperately look between her and Lottie.

"It's okay. It wants us to do this." Lottie gets beside you and tries to comfort you, her breath hitching as you groan in pain when you feel Shauna dig the knife into the side of your throat. "That's it..."

With the pinecone still in your mouth, you try to gurgle out Shauna's name to get her to stop but it's no use - the blade just goes in deeper until you feel blood trails drip down to your chest. But suddenly, your savior comes to the rescue. Nat pushes Shauna out of the way and gets the pinecone out, and you cough and spit up bits of wood. She helps untie you from the weird-looking altar they set up as well, not meaning to push you back so hard as she stumbles for the knife Shauna drops on the ground.

In a haze, you stagger towards them, holding your wound as it throbs with pain. You glance towards Lottie who doesn't even look like she's on this planet right now and wonder what the fuck has gotten into her. She stares at Nat with a sour expression as she holds the knife towards her.

"Oh, fuck. Are you okay?" Nat's voice sounds a bit distorted as you try to keep the blackness from covering your vision completely, and you nod. "'m fine." you wheeze out, shaking your head and trying to fix your vision.

Lottie uses Nat being distracted to jump forward and grab her wrist, snarling in her face. "It's in all of us, you know. Even them. Even you." and she giggles as Nat pushes her down.

You drop to your knees from the overwhelming pain and watch your girlfriend giggle crazily, Nat breezing past you and heading back to the cabin. You make eye contact with Lottie and feel your body freeze as she continues to giggle at no one. The last thing you see before you pass out is her crawling over to you and whispering your name in a sing-songy voice.

The first thing you feel when you wake up is the heavy pressure on your chest.

You groggily open your eyes to find your girlfriend sleeping on you like a cat, all curled up and snoring softly into your neck. You feel weak and your skin is all clammy and covered in sweat as you get up as far as you can and gently push her off. The strength you used causes your neck to throb in pain and you slap your hand over your wound, all the events of last night flooding back to you.

What the actual fuck happened?!

Why did all the girls go crazy on you and try to skin you alive? And why was Lottie calling you a stag like you were game for them to hunt and kill? Jesus, you are never drinking wilderness berries ever again.

The rest of the girls stir in their sleep and slowly begin to wake up. Lottie twitches and sits up, and you avoid her eyes as she looks at you. You get up and groan, your head pounding as you shuffle back to the cabin. As you make your way through the woods, you turn around and see the rest of the group following you and feel a spike of fear. Shauna avoids your gaze with a guilty head turn but Lottie stares into your eyes, looking at you with a curious expression.

You spot Coach and Van sitting out front, Jackie leaning against the door like she's waiting for her cheating husband to come home. She yells at the girls while you keep glancing at Lottie, feeling nervous next to her and getting acutely aware of your blood-soaked shirt.

"Wait, shrooms?" Shauna repeats, and you catch Misty's bashful look as she turns her head away.

You can barely pay attention to the conversation happening right now, too busy trying to figure out if the hushed voices you hear are from the girls or in your head. You suddenly get a staticky feeling in your body, all the hairs on your arms and legs sticking up like something's waiting to happen.

"Wait, stop! Do you hear that?" Lottie's voice breaks you out of your spell as you hear rustling in the bushes behind you. You turn around to see a brown blob among the green, looking closer and realizing that the figure is a bear.

You gasp and back away, accidentally bumping into Lottie's arm. She barely moves back and you have to pull her along with you until your feet hit the stairs of the cabin.

"Shauna, the knife." Lottie shrugs your hand away from her wrist and holds it out for the knife, and you look at her like she's insane. Shauna hands it to her and she slowly starts walking towards the bear.

"Lottie, what the fuck are you doing?" you whisper-yell at her, gripping her wrist roughly and trying to pull her back. "It'll be okay," she tells you, pushing your arm back and stalking forward. You watch with a heavy feeling in your stomach as she comes face to face with the bear, your breathing getting erratic as it looks like it's about to pounce.

But it doesn't - it kneels in front of her like it's letting her kill it. Asking her to. You look away as she stabs it in the head, jumping as you hear the loud roar it lets out from the pain. You hear Lottie's heavy breathing get closer to you until you feel her hand grab your chin, making you look towards her.

"See? I told you. Everything's okay."

—

The awkward silence between you and Lottie as you get dressed is killing you. You feel like you did when you first started dating her - shy and awkward and nervous, like it's your first time seeing her naked. The words get caught in your throat, but you stop stalling and close your eyes, mentally telling yourself to just get it out.

"Are we..." you clear your throat as you finish adjusting your shirt. "Are we okay? I just feel like... we should talk about last night."

She nods at you genuinely and buttons up that green sweater you love so much, walking closer to you and taking your hand in hers. She kisses your knuckles and waits for you to continue. "I wanna be okay with you. Aren't we?"

"You tried to kill me last night." you scoff with a smile, getting serious as you remember how culty everything felt. "Like offering me to the Gods type shit."

"We were all on shrooms." she says with a gentle voice, hypnotizing you with that soft look in her eyes. You roll your eyes and mumble a quiet "Yeah." and kiss her on the lips. She hums as she moves your neck to the side, noticing the deep bite mark she left, getting strangely proud over it.

She kisses the fresh scar on your neck and murmurs, "C'mon. Let's go eat."

—

"Let's join hands."

You groan internally and feel your stomach rumble, begrudgingly putting your food down by your side and letting Lottie take your hand. You can't help but grin at Jackie glaring at Misty as she tries to be friendly and refuses to take her hand.

"To the spirit of the bear, who sacrificed so that we could survive, we give our thanks."

"Thank you." you and everyone else repeat.

"And to the ancient Gods of the sky and the dirt, we give our thanks."

"Thank you." everyone but you and Jackie repeat.

You glance at Lottie out of the corner of your eye, tentatively reaching for your bowl of meat and wondering if it's okay to start eating again.

"Jackie didn't say it," Misty calls out, looking around for approval.

"No, I did not thank the dirt for bringing us a brain-dead bear. What is even happening right now? I mean, what the fuck is wrong with you all?" she breaks, and you know this is going to cause an argument that is going to get ugly real fast.

"Don't tell me to calm down," she yells at Shauna, and you glance at her right next to you and how she clenches her jaw as Jackie confronts her. "What were you gonna do to (Y/N) last night, Shauna?" she crosses her arms and pokes her tongue in her cheek.

You feel Lottie tense up beside you and her pinky touches yours. You hold your breath as Shauna looks back at you guiltily and you avert your gaze to Jackie, feeling a sense of gratitude that she's sticking up for you.

Everything escalates from there - Shauna blows up on Jackie who reveals that she slept with Jeff and got her pregnant. You're not gonna lie, you enjoyed the little drama show you got to witness, but you feel bad for Jackie. She retreated outside, forced out by Shauna with nothing but a blanket. You wanted to go after her but Lottie stopped you, telling you to stay out of it. You sneak out when everyone's asleep though, helping her at least start a little fire and fail to convince her to come back inside. Unbeknownst to you, you hug her for the last time and tell her that Shauna will probably be cooled down by tomorrow morning and everything will be okay.

When you wake up to Shauna screaming and go outside to find Jackie's frozen corpse, all you can think about is if she'd still be alive if you tried harder to convince her to come back with you.

[shut-up-danny-kun]

I've read hundreds of Star Trek TOS fics by now and it never ceases to amuse me how many different ways there are to fuck up Spock's characterization...now hold on just a minute - this post has a more interesting point than “fanfic writers stupid”, I promise you.

Every time, it's a spin on the massacre wheel. It's kind of amazing. Will he be overly emotional to the point where he's not himself anymore? Will he be so cold it's unpleasant and kind of hard to understand how he's lived to this point? Will he be extremely horny for no good reason? Will he speak in a way that sounds complety wrong?

I chuckle and shake my head. Of course, I KNOW what Spock is like, and MY interpretation of him is the most perfect and correct one. Obviously. He's just a very nuanced character, formed by many people in an unconventional way, with traits that seem to contradict each other at first but ultimately form a rich and unique character that so many people fell in love with specifically because he's so complicated...

Or...is he?

Let's entertain the idea that there isn't one correct interpretation of Spock, that all of these messy bits of characterization are not part of a bigger picture, but...just what they are: a product of many people with starkly different visions, working on a show that refuses to properly develop its characters. What then? Well, then Spock is a Rorschach test. Each viewer connects the random dots in their own way, and ignores the ones they don't like.

Let's use an example: me! In my interpretation of Spock (the most correct one, of course) he is, first of all, gay and on the asexual spectrum, reserved, largely uninterested in casual flirting or sex. When he is interested in the aforementioned things, he tends to be quite ashamed of it.

Makes sense, right? I can show you plenty of evidence for why that could be true. However, in the beginning of the first bloody season, Uhura sings a song about how Spock is actually kind of a heartthrob who likes to drive women insane with how hot he is, and Spock smiles. He smiles at her, as if agreeing and being very amused by all this! This interaction goes against pretty much everything I think about Spock. So what do I do? I explain it away in the most bizzare fucking way possible. See, Uhura and Spock are friends (there is no evidence for this), and Uhura knows everything I've just told you about him (through telepathy I guess? Not like he'd ever tell her!) and she's just trolling him (why would she do that? That is NOTHING like Uhura!). I need to do some Olympics-level mental gymnastics here, the opposite of Occam's razor.

“But Danny,” I hear you say, “it's just the start of the show! They hadn't figured out his character yet!”

To which I say: you can say that about anything! You can blame it all on a bad writer for that episode, and ignore virtually any scene that doesn't jive with your headcanons. It's there, and I can't ignore it.

So...how am I different from the people that want Spock to be thar heartthrob Uhura is singing about? That evidence is as much a part of canon as my favorite lines. Well, I'm not any different, that's the thing. And all those writers I complained about also have a point.

It's kind of a nihilistic take, I know, but maybe the reason Spock is such a cultural icon is because he is...whatever you want him to be: just concrete enough to spur on your imagination, yet vague and contradictory enough to let your brain fill in the gaps.

Don't get me wrong: I absolutely do not believe in this. In my mind, it just so happens that I'm one of the, like, 5 people ever who truly understood Spock (and one of them is Jim Kirk himself). But I still think it's something worth thinking about next time you're mad at a fic.

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed Episode 41, part two

(Masterpost) (Pinboard)  (whole thing on AO3)

Warning! Spoilers for All 50 Episodes!

Nie Mingjue and the Terrible Horrible No Good Very Bad Day

Empathy continues, jumping to Meng Yao and Nie Mingjue's encounter in Nightless City. Once again, let's look at how we saw it the first time around.

In Episode 22, Nie Mingjue unwisely decided to do a stealth advance push on Nightless City, as if "stealth" and "Nie Mingjue" ever belonged in a sentence together. After his inevitable capture, Meng Yao rocks up and says hey.

We cut away to the battle outside and then come back inside where NMJ hits MY with a palm strike.

Meng Yao actually expresses anger for once, knocking NMJ over with a kick, and yelling at him for being rude in front of MY's new boss, Wen Ruohan.

NMJ comes after him again but Wen Ruohan gets involved and the fight turns into NMJ vs. WRH until Nie Mingjue is knocked out. He ends up on the floor surrounded by dead or unconscious Nie cultivators; we don't see, at this time, how they got that way.

(More behind the cut!)

In Episode 41: the encounter in front of Wen Ruohan starts the same way, but Meng Yao taunts Nie Mingjue, fondles his shoulder, and then kills a couple of his wingmen.

Meng Yao--Wen Yao?--has never looked better. He's still rocking Nie braids and Nie colors - with a nice snake pattern trimming his robe. I'd like to say this is evidence of his snakey nature, but the idea that snakes are bad and sneaky is a biblical concept, not a Chinese one.

Anyway the important thing about his look here is that his makeup is gorgeous and his demeanor is totally confident. Unfortunately I can't find the tumblr post that talks about his sassy ex-boyfriend energy in this scene, but it was a wise observation.

Nie Mingjue's sidekicks provoke Meng Yao into killing them - one by insulting the hall they're in, and the next by calling him 走狗-- literally "running dog," but Viki translates it as "lackey."

"Lackey" is a little insulting but it's basically a job description, whereas Meng Yao's reaction to being called "running dog" is more like the way people react to being called "boot licker" in English. I'm not saying it should be translated this way, however - feet have a whole lot of meanings across cultures. I think it could have just been translated "running dog" because by 41 episodes into this show, we have learned that calling someone a dog is rude and insulting, thank you Wen Chao.

Anyhoo, after Meng Yao kills the second dude he asks if anyone else wants to call him 走狗, and Nie Mingjue immediately does. Meng Yao just smiles and has his own lackeys bring Baxia, in a fancy box, to him.

Then he fondles the blade while explaining that he's been spending some quality time with it. Nie Mingjue watches helplessly, unwilling to beg but afraid of whatever's going to happen.

Meng Yao tells him that his Dad's sword was better than his, and asks him to guess how many times WRH will have to strike Baxia to break it. I'm saying "strike," but Viki translates it as "smack" and Netflix translates it as "spank," with questionable results. How many times WILL Wen Ruohan spank it, I wonder?

Meng Yao taunts him some more: Wen Ruohan broke NMJ's father's saber and sent it back to him, which caused him to die of anger. He says this while getting up in NMJ's space and putting on an expression of ecstacy.

NMJ hits him, since that's his solution to everything; Meng Yao gets mad and kicks Nie Mingjue to the floor. It's not clear to me why Meng Yao talks so much shit if he doesn't want to get hit.

Aftermath

The confrontation where Xichen protects Meng Yao is the same as episode 23, up to a point. Nie Mingjue wakes up in Lan Xichen's manly arms and has a moment of happiness before seeing Meng Yao standing by holding Baxia.

NMJ goes to attack him but Lan Xichen protects Meng Yao and explains his whole spying gig -- calling him A-Yao, which has gotta chap Nie Mingjue's ass.

Lan Xichen can block a blow from Baxia one-handed. Hot.

There's a nice parallel here, where Meng Yao uses Lan Xichen as a human shield, similar to Wei Wuxian using Lan Wangji to protect him from Fairy in Episode 34.

Wei Wuxian is, of course, way more handsy about it.

Meng Yao passive-aggressively tells Lan Xichen that he didn't explain his actions because that big meanie Nie Mingjue wouldn't have believed him anyway, and then he kneels in front of Nie Mingjue. That's as much as we got of that whole encounter, in Episode 23.

In Episode 41, after Meng Yao kneels, he explains his situation and said that he only said all that dickish stuff to Nie Mingjue to gain Wen Ruohan's trust, and he's sorry about hurting his feelings.

Nie Mingjue says how about you kneel to those dudes you killed.

Lan Xichen tells Nie Mingjue that yes, A-Yao did horrible things, but I believe that in his heart he… we don't hear the rest because Nie Mingjue interrupts by destroying a lantern, but we don't need to hear the rest because it's the same thing Lan Xichen says all the fucking time; it's become his core belief in the years since.

Meng Yao is surprised that it's the lantern that died and not him, but Nie Mingjue is in an impossible situation. Meng Yao has recruited Xichen so completely to his side that if Nie Mingjue wants to stay friends with LXC, he has to accept Meng Yao . You can see in his face that he knows he's beat.

Continued in part 3!

[briarlovesclara]

//mismag 2 spoilers

okay guys we did it. We're here. Behold, the official sequels (!) to my relationship chart. the one on the left is immediately after the finale, the one on the right is several years down the line. enjoy ❤️

(as always, details, alt id, and elaboration under cut.)

OKAY VERSION 1:

Sam and Evan: absolutely nothing has changed since the first post, but now they both know about it. Start an undefined relationship but they're both down bad.

Sam and K: I see the light and I apologize for my ignorance because they are BOTH incredibly down bad. They haven't figured it out yet because they're trying to figure EVERYTHING out but it's there.

Jammer and Evan: Jammer's feelings parallel my first post. What does that mean for him? It means locking his wings and coming over every month to see his people. Evan doesn't need to know what they have; he loves it. No notes from him.

K and Jammer: no labels! They are each other's. When someone asks, they respond "that's my K/Jammer". Nothing else needed.

Jammer and Sam: forgot to put the arrow back mutually to Jammer, but I feel like in the last episode they both sort of realized that they could be Something. At least for me, sometimes I meet or know a person and I suddenly think, "oh, I could definitely develop feelings for them". If you know you know and they're aware, but cautious about it.

K and Evan: controversial, but I think they're both down bad in the finale. They still hold that love so close to the surface. You will see where this goes with the next chart.

×××××

okay i was going to finish this last night but tumblr deleted a good chunk of my written out thoughts for the second chart so i got sad so let's do this again

×××××

VERSION 2:

Sam and Evan: pretty straightforward. They became partners of undefined type after the finale, and then one day they started saying "I'm in love with you", and then they both overthought it that night and came back in the morning like "we do need to talk about that" LMAO. probably get married eventually.

K and Sam: more complex. They're best friends who are also dating in the literal sense of they go on romantic dates. When K visits, they have dinners out and alone time at the house, but they just call it best friends (unless someone disturbs them out in public, in which case it's "leave my girl/boyfriend alone").

K and Evan: they're divorced in a romantic way. They make being exes romantic without actively dating. In 7 years they've kissed like 5 times. Their souls have a deep, old connection that is unshakeable and they are also very close friends. They're kinda funny with it too. They're hanging out and someone messes with one of them? "Hey that's my ex-boyfriend you're talking to." Confusion with style points. They love it and cherish what they had.

Sam and Jammer: they are comfortably friends who are in love with each other. Jammer probably has other romantic relationships and stuff, he's just in love with Sam, 1/5 platonically and 4/5 romantically. Same with Sam. She has her partner, her friend she's dating, and her friend Jammer she's mutually in love with.

Evan and Jammer: literal life partners. They will be together for the rest of their lives. They are each other's number ones, best friends, soulmates. In what way, you ask? What are you, a cop?

K and Jammer: more mature version of their version 1 relationship. Fully established and communicated QPR. Whereas most of the pilot program is vibes and unspoken and just love without labels, they are straight up in a QPR. Once they figure it out it's not a big deal, but when either approaches a new romance it's "by the way, I have a queer platonic partner. Here's the boundaries we have in our relationship."

TLDR: happy family :)

[angelsdean]

dean doing his whole recently divorced routine in 15x06 by wandering around the home in his PJs and indulging in comfort food and sulking and talking to his ex on the phone while they're both so so annoyed but dean is also still worried for cas's safety while cas is doing what he does best, isolating and still trying to do the Right Thing and get some #wins bc he thinks that's what he needs to do but dean has never asked that of him. and he's so annoyed when he's called out for his avoidant behavior esp when it's not abt him and dean but actually chuck being back and also the knowledge that yea dean still cares about him and his safety even when they're both pissed at each other and isn't that the reason cas loves him in the first place, bc dean cares. about the whole world even!

and then in the next ep dean runs into an old ex and relives some highs only to realize that guy is a total foil to his (ex)-husband who he misses dearly and who cares and always tries to do the right thing even when it backfires and goes wrong and so after killing his old ex he returns home to where his husband has been looking after his brother and they stand on opposite sides of the room with the literal world between them (map table) and it's awkward but they both want to makeup so bad already (we can fix this / it's not broken / i'd rather have you / of course i wanted you to stay etc etc). but reaching out is Hard.

and then in the NEXT episode dean cuts his hand for a spell so they can go get couples therapy from rowena and then cas REACHES OUT to heal dean even tho they're still annoyed w/ each other and it's a first gesture and then rowena tells them to get their act together bc life is short and remember crowley my dear son crowley and then they go to purgatory and they bicker but at least they're talking and then cas is gone again and maybe dead and dean is like NO NO NO i can't lose him again and yea life is short and i need to tell you i need you to know OF COURSE I WANTED YOU TO STAY AND ANOTHER THING--(i love you) and cas is like i heard your prayer (don't say that or i'll die). anyway i love divorce arc. they both still care so so much and it's so obvious in everything they do