#the last shot OOOF!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Army of bastards akdhaksjsks YEAAAAAHHH

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Keep That Crown 

Ask: No. 19 during a dystopian tv game show where contestants have to do ridiculous physical challenges while fully dilated and ready to push. Last one to fully give birth wins fabulous prizes. 

Thank you Anon, this is the most amazingly ridiculous prompt ever and was a joy to write. The story is completely satire, unrealistic, and purely for entertainment purposes. Special thanks to the talented @exponenshul for writing the third challenge, and to @gravid-transluna for being my incredible beta. You’re both amazing humans! 💜 (8k words)

Prompt: “I can’t stop it… nnghhh I’m pushingg!”

~•~

"Goooooood evening guys and girls. It's Saturday night, we're live, and welcome to another episode of..." "Keep That Crown!" Cheers the studio audience.

The TV presenter, Danny, continues. "For those of you who are new to our little corner of television, this is a game show where we take five mothers-to-be and put them to the test in a number of household challenges. Sounds easy enough, right? Well, the catch is that each mum-to-be is in active labour...and fully dilated! Whoever can complete all five challenges without giving birth has a chance to win our grand prize, and the last one standing will win a whopping £100,000.00!"

"Oooooooh." The audience awes on cue.

"Now let's meet tonight's contestants." Danny says with a staged smile, his overly white teeth glinting under the spotlights. Walking across the studio floor the camera pans to five heavily pregnant women, each standing behind a podium displaying their name. "Contestant number one is Mandy. She's 41 weeks pregnant with her first baby, a girl. How are you doing tonight Mandy?" The presenter asks casually.

"Ooof- I'm good thanks Danny. Focused and ready for the challenges. It's my first baby so hoping that works in my favour... hooooo...." A contraction cuts off Mandy's fighting talk and she grips the podium and hangs her head, panting heavily.

"First time mums are usually the most successful at this game, so good luck, Mandy! Next up we have Anna." The TV presenter walks across to the next pregnant woman, who's holding her contracting belly and swaying her hips side to side. "Anna is also a first time mum-to-be, 39 weeks pregnant with a baby boy. Do you think you're going to win tonight, Anna?"

"Mnnnghh I'm gonna g-give it my best shot." Anna says timidly with a grimace and a forced smile.

"Contestant number 3 is Becky. Becky is 37 and a half weeks pregnant with her third baby. Some of you eagle eyed viewers may recognise Becky from her second pregnancy and birth. You were unsuccessful last time, managing only two rounds before the head popped out during the dishwasher challenge. Reckon you can make it to the final round this time, Becky?"

"I hope so... hooohooo.... But ohh, this labour came on quicker than expected.... Mnnnnngh, three hours from first contraction to full dilation. But I'm hoping this little one can stay in a bit longer." Becky's cheeks were flushed pink and the sweat glistened on her forehead. Her tight leggings showed just how wide her gait was and every couple of minutes her knees bounced.

"Well, good luck to you Becky." Danny said before turning directly towards the camera. "Looks like she's going to need it." He added with a laugh and a wink.

"Now, next up we have Claudia. Another first time mum, 40 weeks pregnant exactly." The brunette was in the midst of a contraction and merely waved at the camera before holding on to the podium and groaning under her breath.

"And finally we have Niamh. Niamh is 37 weeks pregnant and this is a first for Keep That Crown - she's pregnant with twins!" Danny announced to a cheer from the audience. "You caused quite the discussion with our producers Niamh, as you're pregnant with two lovely healthy babies, we had to decide what the rules would be. Now, even though you're carrying two, you will need to keep both babies from being born in order to qualify for the final round. Reckon you can do that?"

"Definitely, Danny!" Niamh answered confidently. "Twins run in my family, but so do long labours. I'm here to win!"

She planted her hands on her hips and grinned. Her bump was bigger and lower than any of the other contestants and yet she seemed the most relaxed and sure of herself.

"That's the spirit Niamh!" Danny said. "Okay, now that we've met the contestants, let's start the challenges!!" He walked over to a new part of the stage, which was set up like a mini grocery store. The contestants followed, albeit more slowly.

"The first challenge is our iconic grocery shop challenge." Danny explained to the five labouring mothers. "Each of you have been given a shopping list of 7 different items. Your task is to go through our pretend supermarket, collect all the items on your list, and make it back to your podiums. You can use either a basket or the trolly to carry your items, but all items must be back here before the time is up. And remember, no matter how much you want to push, you just have to..."

"Keep that crown!" Shouts the studio audience.

"On your marks, get set.... GO!"

Niamh and Becky were first off the mark and waddled quickly towards the pretend supermarket. They both grabbed a trolly and rushed up and down the aisles of food, searching feverishly for their items. Anna and Mandy were quick to follow, and they chose the handheld basket option. Claudia, however, hadn't left her original position.

"Claudia, you need to move if you're going to collect all your items before the time runs out..." Danny tried to encourage the mum-to-be, but she was groaning loudly and gripping the podium tight.

"Ohhhhhh god. It's so low.... The pressure...." She whimpered.

"Don't push, Claudia. You've got to keep that crown!"

She staggered forward on unsteady legs and eventually reached the supermarket trolly. Barely making it down one aisle, Claudia stopped and squatted, holding on to the cart with a white-knuckled grip.

"Looks like Claudia is already pushing...that was fast. She'd better hope the baby doesn't come out any further or she's not even going to make it through the first challenge!" Danny narrates the scene whilst the camera follows each woman around the store.

Anna and Mandy were throwing items into their baskets, rushing quickly between contractions. Niamh and Becky had already got the first few items in their trolley’s. Whilst Niamh was ploughing ahead, Becky was struck by a forceful contraction and was bracing herself against an aisle. The third-time mother had one hand between her legs and she was mooing slightly under her breath.

Claudia managed to get one item in her trolley but soon gave up completely, crumpling to the floor on all fours and actively pushing her baby out. The bulge in her leggings could be seen appearing and then slipping back again.

"And Niamh is the first one back! Impressive with her twin-filled bump. She's closely followed by Anna and Mandy." Danny joined the returning mothers who were bent over and panting back at their stands. "Becky is still working her way around the store, but seems to be struggling. And- uh oh, Claudia!"

The camera cuts to Claudia on all fours by the frozen foods, the distinctive outline of a fully birthed head now protruding her clothing.

"Aaaand we have our first birth, ladies and gentlemen. Unfortunately, Claudia was not able to get through the first challenge and is now delivering her baby in aisle 3!" Danny enthusiastically announced.

The cameras kept their focus on Claudia as she pushed and pushed, but cut back to the TV host when the medical team went over to undress the birthing mother and help deliver the baby.

The sound of a baby crying filled the studio, and the show went to commercial break.

~•~

"Welcome back to Part 2 of Keep That Crown! We have four ladies left in the competition with just as many challenges still to go." Danny said while giving an award-winning smile to the camera.

"Next up is our infamous dishwasher challenge. Looking at you, Becky!" The presenter jokes and the camera cuts to the labouring mother in question. Becky is sweating and holding her extremely low baby bump and rolls her eyes.

Danny continues explaining to the audience at home. "In this challenge, our mums-to-be are tasked with unloading a dishwasher. Now, I've never been pregnant myself so at first, I didn't fully understand why this task would be a challenge. However, since working on this show, I've come to realise just how difficult it is for a heavily pregnant woman to load and unload a dishwasher. It may sound easy, folks, but this challenge has got the better of quite a few mums over the years. Not to mention our current contestant, Becky."

Danny, followed by the camera, travels across the studio to talk to the mums. "Now last time Becky, when you were birthing your second child, this was the challenge that got you. Do you think you'll fare any better tonight?" The presenter asked.

"I don't know Danny... mnghhhh... this baby is pretty desperate to- ugh!- come out." Becky's hands were holding her bump as she swayed side to side, knees dipping whenever she grunted.

"It certainly sounds that way!" Danny's eyebrows raised at the deep groans coming from this third-time-mum. "Now, if you could all make your way over to your allocated dishwashers."

Danny followed the women to the dishwasher setup and began to instruct. "Each of you has an identical dishwasher filled with crockery, cutlery and glassware. Your task is to get all the items out of the machine and stacked on top. You can start on the sound of the buzzer. Three... two... one..."

A klaxon is heard blaring across the studio and the music starts.

Each of the four contestants seemed to approach the challenge in a different way, and Danny began commentating on the challenge as it unfolded.

"First-time mums Mandy and Anna, each carrying one baby and having the smallest bumps of the group, have gone for the regular, forward bend. Mandy is attempting the bottom tray first, starting with the plates and crockery in the most cumbersome of the locations, whereas Anna has decided to tackle the glassware on the top tray, perhaps waiting to build herself up for the more difficult lower level.

"And Becky, our darling returning mum-to-be, has clearly made a strategy after last time. She's taken a new approach of kneeling on the ground beside the dishwasher, picking up plates and putting them on top of the machine. There'll be less physical movement with this choice, but whether her strategy pays off - time will tell." "And lastly we have our mum of twins Niamh. With the biggest belly, carrying two very healthy babies, doesn't have the option of the forward bend and is clearly not sure about getting down onto her knees. What is she going to do ladies and gentlemen?.... Oh, wow. That's a risky move from Niamh!"

The expectant mum of twins was rather nimbly dropping into a deep squat, her obscenely large belly hanging low between her jackknifed thighs and brushed the ground. Collecting a few plates and holding them against her bump in one arm, she pulls herself back to standing to place them above the machine. Seconds later, she's squatting again, collecting the side plates and bowls.

"Wow. Our Irish beauty Niamh is flying ahead in this challenge, but her method is risky and we have never ever seen it used successfully before." Danny's tone showed he was impressed.

Becky had managed to unload half of the bottom tray before she started to obviously struggle. Her knees slide wider on the studio floor, another contraction tightening up her bump and contorting it into a hard round ball. Bracing the tops of her thighs her hips sunk low to the ground and she grunted long and deep.

"Oh no!" Danny cried out. "Looks like Becky is pushing again. Her third baby is eager to join us."

The camera zooms in on the labouring woman; her face red and splotchy with the effort of birth. She was panting and groaning heavily, and from the low angle of the camera, the bulge in her leggings was undeniable. Shouts began to arise from the studio audience. "Don't push!" "Keep that crown!"

"Come on Becky, this challenge bested you last time- don't let it happen again! Keep that crown, mumma!" Danny encouraged.

The third time mum couldn't stop pushing, so in desperation she placed a hand between her thighs to stop the baby coming out any further. Becky grunted forcefully again into her palm and when the contraction was over and her hand removed, the head still appeared to be at a full crown inside her clothing, but was no longer moving. Becky exhaled, shook her head, and continued to remove the remaining items in her dishwasher.

"Anna is flying ahead in this challenge, closely followed by Niamh - those twins seem happy to stay in her belly." Danny observed. "...But it looks like Mandy is starting to struggle."

The soon to be mum was bent over the dishwasher, bracing her thighs and circling her hips, all thoughts of the challenge momentarily forgotten. Her heavy belly squished up tight, contracting forcefully and trying to evict its occupant. She whimpered and wailed as her baby sunk lower and lower, stretching her wide, desperate to be born.

"Uh oh, looks like she's struggling to keep that baby in. The question is.... Will she push?" Danny teased joyfully, adding drama to the already chaotic scenes.

Mandy could be seen muttering to herself under her breath.... Don't push don't push don't push... And yet her efforts were in vain, as the labouring mother soon dropped into a deep squat and bore down, groaning loudly.

"Mandy- hooooo... no! Don't p-push!!" Anna tried to encourage her fellow contestant, breathing heavily as she placed her final item on top of the dishwasher completing the challenge.

"Nnngghhhhh... I can't stop it! I'm pushing!!" Mandy cried, letting out a primal grunt. The bulge between her open legs got bigger and bigger as she pushed, the baby slipping further between her folds and into her tight leggings.

"Aaaaand Anna is the first to complete the challenge!" Danny announces loudly to the studio. "But it looks like we have yet another mother falling at the dishwasher hurdle. Mandy, that baby is almost out.... If the head comes fully out, you are out of the competition."

"Oh god! No..... it's coming out!!!!" Mandy groaned, her body working of its own accord, bearing down and pushing the giant head through her opening. The unmistakable cry of relief that followed told everyone in the studio that the baby's head had been born.

"That leaves three remaining contestants; Anna has finished the task, closely followed by Niamh. Darn, I was sure all that squatting was going to result in a birth- but well done to Niamh! Who do we have left? Oh yes, Becky." Danny smiled and walked beside the labouring mother as she tried to complete the task. "How are we doing Becky?"

"Mnnghhh!" Becky apparently could not speak, putting all her focus and energy on the two tasks - unloading the dishwasher and not birthing her baby. Her knees were wide as she knelt on the floor, the baby's head way beyond a full crown but not quite fully born. She huffed as she picked up the last remaining item, her body trembling as she reached up to place the small plate on the top of the machine, the crockery clinking as she shook whilst stretching up, desperately trying to get that final item in place and complete the challenge that had previously beaten her.

"YES!!!" She cried when the plate slipped onto the pile of clean dishes, and panted heavily with relief. Whoops and cheers rang out from the audience.

"You did it!!!! Well done Becky." Danny exclaimed. "Now, let's go to commercial break, giving our mothers a well-earned rest-" ...the sound of Mandy grunting and pushing in the background briefly interrupted the TV host... "-and also to let Mandy birth her baby girl. Be back in five, folks!"

~•~

Shortly thereafter, Danny and the contestants were lined up for the next challenge, each woman now standing in front of a wardrobe.

"Welcome back to Keep That Crown, where we've had an exciting first two rounds!" Danny announced. "Let's take a moment to check up on our contestants before we move on, shall we?"

He walked over to Anna, who was holding out strong, but definitely getting tired. She was sweating profusely and cradling her low, heavy belly.

"So, what are your thoughts on the challenges so far, Anna?" Danny asked.

"Umm...hmm." Anna muttered, obviously not focused on answering questions. "It's tough. But...hngggh...I think I can h-hold on."

"Let's hope!" Danny said, striding over to the next contestant. "And how are you feeling, Niamh?"

"Feeling good!" Niamh proclaimed, patting her belly. She was breathing heavier and a few beads of sweat could be detected on her forehead, but otherwise she was looking fine. "Ready for another round."

Danny nodded. "Well, that certainly was an impressive feat you pulled off in the last challenge!" He chuckled, then continued on to the last remaining contestant. "And, Becky..."

Becky was standing shamelessly in a somewhat bow-legged position, a massive bulge still in her leggings, as big as before and dripping fluid through her clothes. Surely she was only one small push away from birthing the head. Her whole body was practically shaking from the effort of keeping her baby in.

"...I'm just surprised that baby hasn't budged at all," Danny said frankly.

Becky grunted and her jaw clenched. "Just...get on with the- huuuhh- challenge," She grumbled, stowing one hand between her trembling thighs.

Danny returned to his side of the stage. "All right, time for round three! This one is the Dress-Up challenge. Each contestant has been provided with a wardrobe. Inside is a dress which you must change into, as if you were getting ready for your very own baby shower! Once that's complete, you'll have to return the dress and change back into your regular clothes."

The contestants gave each other exasperated looks. Getting changed is hard work for a pregnant woman even on a normal day... doing it while deep in labour was going to be tough.

"On your marks...get set...go!!" Danny hollered.

The women turned toward their wardrobes and opened them up. They each had an identical dress, with loose, thin cloth that was sure to fit their maternal bodies. Getting it on would be the hard part.

Becky grabbed the dress right away, but she looked over and saw the women next to her starting to take off their tops and bottoms. She looked over at Danny. "Uhh...do we need to strip down to our underwear for this challenge...?"

"Yes, that's usually part of getting changed..." Danny said with a chuckle. The audience laughed along with him.

Becky gulped. "Nngh...o-okay..."

Niamh had already removed her top and was shimmying her leggings down over her hips, leaving her in only a bra and panties.

Anna followed suit, but had to stop before getting her shirt over her head due to a contraction. She doubled over and groaned, gripping her belly. "Oohhh...hoo, God, I dunno if I can do this..."

Meanwhile, Becky was still looking between herself and the dress, only slowly starting to lift her shirt up as her baby's crowning head continued to burden her. It seemed the stress was getting to her.

Niamh sat her clothes off to the side and grabbed the dress. She paused for a contraction, but it barely seemed to phase her. She bent over a bit and exhaled deeply before quickly righting herself.

Anna was now struggling with getting off her leggings. She'd chosen to wear extra tight leggings, hoping they would help hold in the baby in an emergency. But now, after working up a sweat, the fabric clung to her. She was able to roll them down past her hips, but another contraction struck. She squatted just a tad, on shaky legs. "Mmmggghh come on!"

Beside her, Niamh had pulled the dress up over her head, knowing that was the only way it was fitting around her big twin bump.

Becky had only just removed her shirt. She was standing there in her bra and tented-out leggings, clutching her firm belly and muttering to herself.

"Becky?" Danny called out, not sure what was going on. "You should strip down a little quicker if you want to carry on with the challenge..."

Becky gulped again, then nodded. "O-okay..."

Anna had gotten her leggings to her ankles, but as she tried to kick them off, her belly cramped again and she fell forward onto her knees. She grimaced and cried out. "Nooooo aghhh I can feel it coming! I-I don't wanna puuush!"

"Folks, Anna says she doesn't want to push...but will her body agree?!" Danny wondered aloud. The audience focused their attention on the poor labouring woman.

Anna clenched her fists, grunting through the contraction. Now in just her panties, it was all the more clear that she was starting to bulge from the baby's head...

Suddenly, a gasp from the audience. "Wait...what's that? What's she wearing?!"

People turned their heads toward the cause of her outcry. The TV cameras pointed toward Becky, and Danny's jaw dropped when he saw what was happening.

Becky had gotten her leggings down to her knees but the act had revealed her secret weapon. Beneath her leggings and over her underwear, she was wearing a thick leather belt with material that went over her crotch.

Murmurs began to rise in the audience. "Is that... a chastity belt?" "For real? Is that allowed?"

Becky blushed, both from embarrassment and exertion.

Danny was flabbergasted. "Well, I've never seen this, folks...Becky was wearing a leather chastity belt the whole time!"

More audience comments. "Wow, how did she hide that?" "No wonder she was able to hold that baby in!"

"Now, as we know, cheating or giving yourself any unfair advantage is strictly against the rules..." Danny said solemnly. "So, I'm afraid that means I'm going to have to disqualify you from the competition, Becky."

Cameras zoomed in as tears welled in Becky's eyes. "I'm...sorry," she whimpered. "I just...wanted to win so badly this time...but- hnnnngggaaah!"

She was cut off as another contraction hit her. She fell to her knees, and it was clear she was pushing as hard as she could. But no matter how hard she pushed, the baby's head couldn't fully emerge with the leather in the way. She groaned heavily. "Gghh...but...I give up! I'm done! Someone- nngngghhh- just get this belt off of me! The baby needs to come OUT!"

The medics rushed over while the studio audience reeled from the chaos. The cameras turned back to Danny, who was still somewhat in shock. "Well, that was certainly something, folks! We have only two contestants remaining, now. Let's see how they're doing."

Neither Niamh nor Anna let themselves be too distracted by what transpired- they had more important things to focus on. Niamh had fully put on her dress and was taking a minute to pose in it for the cameras. Anna had resisted the urge to push for the time being, and was now grabbing her own dress. She adorned it in a very stiff manner, trying not to move around too much and risk wanting to bear down again.

Niamh removed her dress with ease, but as she was reaching for her original clothes again, a contraction gripped her. This time, she leaned against her wardrobe and groaned, rubbing her belly. She turned her head down and winced, and it looked like she may have finally been starting to falter.

"What are you feeling, Niamh?" Danny asked, trying to sound engaged again after the previous incident. "Hang on, you're almost there!"

"Mmghh...not pushing yet, Danny!" Niamh said, returning to her confident demeanour. She grabbed her clothes and stood back up fully.

Anna had gotten her dress on, but was hunched over again, cradling her swell. "Hooo...gghh...it wants to come out...s-so bad..." She glanced over at Danny. "Can I just...nngggh...keep the dress on?"

"The challenge isn't complete until you change back into your regular clothes!" Danny insisted. Anna groaned and began trying to strip the dress off.

Niamh was once more working at a surprisingly fast pace. With her dress cast aside, she was able to quickly get her clothes back on. It took a bit of time to wrestle her shirt back over her big bump, but once it was on, she raised her arms in victory. The audience cheered.

"It looks like Niamh has completed the challenge! That just leaves Anna- will she make it?" Danny announced.

Anna now had her shirt back on and was gripping her leggings in one hand, but she was riding through another contraction. She leaned on her arms against the wardrobe, her hips angled back.

"Ooohh...ooh, no, baby...nnggghh!" The labouring woman moaned. She tensed up, and her panties bulged out just slightly. The baby was starting to crown. "Guh...I just...gotta get these leggings back on..."

After a few rounds together and only two contestants left, the audience was getting invested. They began to chant, "Go! Go! Keep that crown!"

Mustering her strength, Anna bent down and started to put on her leggings. She was sweating, and it took a great deal of effort to pull the fabric up around her shaky legs. She grunted and panted, trying to keep her legs together long enough to get the leggings over her thighs and hips, even though she desperately wanted to spread them and push.

After a couple minutes of struggle, Anna was finally able to hike her leggings up tight around her waist. She felt between her legs and gave a small sigh of relief, knowing that there was more of a barrier over the emerging head now.

Danny clapped along with the audience. "Well done, Anna! That's round three done. Let's take a quick break and set up for the fourth challenge!"

~•~

“Welcome back to Keep That Crown.” Danny said straight to camera with his best showbiz smile. “If you are just joining us you have missed one hell of an episode so far; three babies born, a set of twins still on the way and our first case of cheating by chastity belt. You certainly won’t get all that on any other show!” 

The camera zooms out and reveals Danny is standing between two heavily pregnant women. “We have two mums-to-be left in the competition - the lovely Anna on my left, expecting a little boy, and the incredible Niamh on my right, who is carrying twins. Now girls, we’re over half-way through the competition now and it’s just the two of you left. How are you feeling Anna?” 

Standing behind her podium Anna pants heavily, her face flushed, gripping her belly and forcing a smile. “It’s— it’s definitely getting tougher. Hooooo… it’s so hard not to p-push….” Her feeble voice whimpers with another contraction and Danny takes the cue and turns his attention to Niamh. 

“And Niamh, you have been storming through these challenges, and you are carrying two babies in there.” He nods and pats Niamh’s obscenely large belly drooping from her hips. “Have you been struggling to resist the urges to push as well?” 

“Well having two of them in there certainly adds a level of difficulty but… mnnnhhh… it’s been okay so far. Just need to breathe through those u-urges…” Niamh’s confident words ring out across the studio but her knees bend subtly, her hands cupping the underside of her gravid swell as one of the baby’s head sinks and presses even lower. 

“There are two more challenges to go. Let’s hope you both can make it through round four. For this challenge each of you will be given a baby doll, your task will be to change the baby’s nappy, dress the baby, and get them into the pram. Don’t worry Niamh, unlike real life you don’t have to do this twice. You each get one baby.” 

The Irish mum laughed through gritted teeth, trying to keep her cool through the increasing contractions. 

“If you two lovely ladies follow me.” Danny instructed, walking the labouring mothers to a new corner of the television studio. Both mothers were walking more and more bow-legged by the minute, but followed silently behind the host. 

“As you can see there are three parts to this challenge; nappy change, dressing baby, and the pram. And I know what you’re thinking, you’re thinking “Oh but Danny, you’ve forgotten to set up the prams” but we haven’t.” The TV host smirked to the camera and the audience at home. “Prams these days are so nifty, collapsing into the smallest space to fit easily into the boot of your cars. You will have to work out how to open the pram in order to safely strap your baby doll into the seat.” 

Niamh nodded in understanding, her eyes already analysing the pram in question and its potential latches. Anna meanwhile looked hesitant, nervous, holding her belly and swaying her hips in rapid movements to try and alleviate the relentless pressure between them. 

“Right, Anna you stand here. And Niamh you stand here.” Danny ushered the labouring women to their respective stations for the challenge. “Any questions?” 

“C-can we get any h-help with the pram? Like a partner?” Anna stuttered, trying to steady her breath and her spasming womb. 

“I’m afraid no help is allowed. You have to do all parts of this challenge by yourself. And you can’t leave the baby on the changing mat when you set up the pram, they could roll off, so you must carry them and put them in the pram.” 

Anna paled briefly, looking like she might faint or throw up. 

“On your marks… get set… go!!” Danny cheered and the tense but upbeat music of the challenge sounded around the studio. 

It was neck-and-neck through the first part of the challenge, with both Niamh and Anna confidentially removing the nappy from the toy baby and wrapping a new one over the bottom half of the doll. They weren’t competing for the quickest time, they just had to complete the challenge from start to finish, but even without the time pressure the urgency was clear from the expressions of both women. They wanted this challenge done so they could be one step closer to birthing their babies. 

Unsurprisingly, Niamh finished the nappy change first. The Irish mother was already an audience favourite and steaming ahead in this game. However, before she could pick up the baby clothes to dress the doll her eyes suddenly widened and she curled forward over her large twin-filled belly, gripping the edge of the wooden change table in a death grip. 

“Mmmghhh— oh god!!!!” Niamh groaned loudly as her belly visibly contracted and squashed her babies lower towards their exit. “Fuck…. I can f-feel a head….hoohoohoo…” 

“Oh no, looks like our fan-favourite is starting to struggle.” Danny said excitedly. 

Groaning deeply. Niamh squeezed her grip on the changing table and screwed her eyes shut. “Nngh—! The pressure—” the Irish mother grunted and her knees dipped and widened. 

Seeing her competition struggling, Anna bit her lip through the contraction and quickly pulled the clothing onto her doll and finished the first and second part of the challenge in rapid time. As she stepped towards the pram, the toy baby in arms, it was clear that Anna was racing against more than just her competitor. Her hand lowered, trembling with the effort of denying her instincts, and felt the partially crowned head. “Come on baby…. Just a little bit longer.” Her quiet words to her child were picked up on the microphone and an encouraging cheer erupted from the audience. 

With one arm holding the fake baby, Anna had to work out how to open the pram single-handed. Huffing her way through contractions, red-faced and sweating, Anna pulled and twisted the handle but the pram remained in its collapsed state. 

Niamh meanwhile had survived the aggressive contraction but in her desperation had clamped a hand between her thighs to try and keep herself from pushing. She was now attempting to dress the baby one-handed which wasn’t very successful. 

“Niamh, you’re going to have to work with both hands if you want to keep your winning streak.” Danny said to the contestant over the audience's cheers. 

“But— but it feels like the baby is slipping o-out….” Niamh was frazzled, overcome with the sensations of birth and her cool confidence was fast unravelling. 

“Uh oh— Niamh says the baby is slipping out. What does she need to do ladies and gentlemen?” Danny asked the excitable studio audience who responded with a chorus of “KEEP THAT CROWN!” 

“Ooohhhhhh…. Danny!!! The pram… it just w-won’t o-open!!!!” Anna shouted and the camera pans around to find her on her knees beside the collapsed contraption. The doll was wedged in an elbow so she could use both hands and she was frustratingly pulling and squeezing and twisting every inch of the pram trying desperately to unlock and open it. 

“They do open Anna. They just have a little… knack to them.” Danny winked at the camera before it panned out to show both women struggling to open their prams while simultaneously crowning with their unborn babies. 

“Jesus, who the fuck designed this thing?!” Niamh cursed as she pulled the handle expecting it to expand but grunted with frustration when it didn’t. The Irish mum-to-be had stuffed the toy doll down her top after dressing it, wedging it under her shirt between her breasts and belly in order to use both hands on the final part of this challenge. 

“Ohhhhh god… this baby wants o-ouuttt….” Anna rocked on hands and knees, momentarily abandoning her pram and putting all her efforts into not giving birth. 

Niamh wasn’t looking much better, grunting and occasionally placing her hands between her thighs when her body automatically pushed. 

“This is going to be a close one ladies and gentlemen. Looks like both Anna and Niamh are pushing and it’s going to be a battle of willpower to see who makes it through this challenge.” 

“Mmngghhh….. no— don’t come out—!” Anna grunted, pulling the waistband of her leggings up and making the fabric taut and unforgiving at the crotch, creating a barrier against the emerging head. 

“Oh! Oh! I’ve got it!!” Niamh cried, finding the switch that when pressed allowed the pram to fully expand. “Anna… it’s on the left, by the l-logo…” Niamh panted as she pulled the fake baby out from under her top and almost threw it into the seat, quickly buckling the baby into the straps and clamping her hands between her thighs once more before the next contraction could strike. 

Anna scrambled on her knees, searching for the latch Niamh had mentioned. The pressure between her hips was building, the baby certainly at a full crown in her underwear. “Ohhhh god…. I need to push….” Rocking on her knees Anna flailed her hands over the pram and with a cry of relief found the button and the pram popped open. Placing her fake baby in the seat and buckling it in, tears fell from Anna’s eyes as she trembled against the raging waves of her labour. 

“Wow! Excellent work ladies; you have both completed the fourth challenge.” Danny announced, genuinely impressed that both contestants were still in the game. “Let’s take a quick break and we will be back with the fifth and final challenge. Who will keep that crown, and who will fall at the last hurdle? See you in five!” 

~•~

“Welcome back to the final part of Keep That Crown, the only game show that’ll have you pushing babies instead of buttons. As you may have guessed, we are getting in the Christmas spirit for the fifth and final challenge.” Danny wiggles his head slightly and the camera pans out to reveal a red and white Santa hat on top of his perfectly styled hair. “We decided to change things up as the holiday season approaches and we have a festive final challenge for you this week. Don’t worry folks, it is a relatively simple task, but… doing it whilst deep in the throes of labour?…” The wide and wicked grin from the TV presenter shines bright across the studio right into the television screens to all the people at home. “This may be our toughest challenge to date.”

As Danny continued talking to the camera the distinctive sounds of groaning and heavy breathing in the background grew louder. Danny walks across the studio, followed by the camera, and stands beside the two remaining contestants who were both now dressed up as Mrs Santa Claus. In hourglass silhouettes, the red velvet cinched at the waist but stretched tight across their pregnant bellies, the hem finished with luscious white fur. The dresses were short, barely covering their hips, allowing a clear view of the tight leggings underneath. Niamh’s hands were still clamped between her thighs as she sweated profusely, panting erratically. While Anna was groaning, her hands splayed wide across the velvet surface of her belly as if she could just hold the baby inside. 

“Ladies, I see you’re both dressed for the season.” Danny said cheerfully but his enthusiasm was not reciprocated. Anna’s face was blotchy and flushed as she held back her urges, sweat rolling down the side of her cheeks. Whereas Niamh looked fiery and frustrated, her knees dipping every few seconds, hands clamped firm at her crotch as she gritted “Get-on-with-it-!” 

Danny put his hands up in mock-surrender “Okay, okay. Let’s get on with the final task…. The Christmas Tree challenge!” In a corner of the studio there were two large Christmas trees, over 10ft in height, and both were completely bare. Beside each tree was a box filled with all manner of decorations from lights and tinsel, to beads and baubles. “Niamh, Anna, your challenge is simple; to decorate the Christmas tree. Your Christmas trees must be completely decorated, from the lowest branches all the way to the highest. Your tree must have at least 3 different types of decorations and it must have the star on the very top.” 

Two assistants on the show briefly came into shot, each placing a step ladder beside the trees and promptly running off stage. The ladders were clearly for the women to use in order to get to the very top of the Christmas tree. Anna visibly gulped with fear, while Niamh was staring at the floor very obviously pushing against her hand. 

“I would usually speak with each of you before the challenge, but erm, I’m guessing neither of you are up for chit chat..?” Danny asked with a laugh and got a grunting response from the Irish mother-to-be. “Okay then. Let’s dive into the challenge. On your marks, get set, GO!” 

Immediately Niamh waddled bow-legged and determined towards her tree, carefully removing one hand from between her legs and grabbing the set of Christmas lights from her box. Staggering side to side around the large tree, the labouring woman tossed sections of the lights with reckless abandon onto the different branches of the pine tree. Round and around she went adding the white lights up the tree but when she reached shoulder height she looked nervously up at the top of the tree, knowing what had to be done next. Niamh stood at the bottom of the step-ladder, gripping it tight with one fist while the other remained firm between her legs. She paused, waiting for the miniscule gap between contractions, before taking a hesitant step up the ladder. 

Meanwhile Anna seemed to be struggling to put one foot in front of the other, her head was dipped low as she held her large bump and breathed heavily. She tried to move but a squeaking whimper came out instead. 

“Come on Anna, you’re so close, don’t give up now.” Danny tried to encourage. 

“Oooohhh… I can’t— move—” Anna said with a fearful whine. 

Danny watched her struggle for a few seconds before taking pity on the girl and wrapped a supportive arm around her waist. “Come on, love. Let’s get you to your tree.” Angry voices came through the presenter’s earpiece as he then yelled to someone off screen “I’m just helping her get to the challenge, that’s all!” 

When they reached her designated challenge area, Anna gripped onto the step ladder, her wide legs trembling with the effort of not giving birth. “I can’t help you anymore sweetheart, but you’re so close. You can do this.” Danny encouraged quietly. Anna nodded, breathing deeply, preparing herself for the final hurdle. Then she abruptly let go of the ladder and dived into the decorations box grabbing as much as she could carry and unceremoniously whacking the decorations along the bottom branches of the tree. 

The Irish mother-to-be was now halfway up the step ladder trying to throw the Christmas lights around the top few branches of the tree. With a final effort she rose up onto her tiptoes and leant forward, lassoing the lights over the very top. The movement came with a price as a split second later the microphone caught her sharp gasp and the camera showed a clear bulge protruding between her thighs, her hand quickly moved to clamp hard against her crotch. 

“Niamh….” Danny’s words were jokingly stern as he stood beneath her ladder. “Was that a head poking through?” 

“No! Nnnghh— of course not. Still-ohhhh-very much c-crowning Danny!” She gritted loudly with a slight hiss through her teeth. 

“Good girl, remember to Keep That Crown!” Danny said, getting the audience to join in, everyone soon chanting the show’s iconic catchphrase. 

Over by the other tree, Anna had thrown all manner of decorations onto the bottom half of the pine tree. There was no style or strategy, the labouring woman frantically grabbing and hooking any decoration she could find onto the spindly branches. Sweat was dripping down her face and she took a breather at the decoration table, wiping her brow with the thick soft velvet of the sleeve of her festive costume. Anna lowered a hand between her legs, her eyes pinching hesitantly as she felt the crown of her baby’s head just inside her clothing. 

“Stay there little guy.” She whispered, exhausted but determined. 

“Anna, how are you getting on, sweetheart?” Danny asked, out of shot of the camera but carefully watching and narrating the scene to the audience at home.  

“I’m— ohhhhhh— hanging in there. And…I’ve got an idea…” Anna said aloud, then surprisingly picked up the whole plastic box of decorations and carried it over and up the step ladder. 

Gasps could be heard from the studio audience, impressed at her stamina and strength. Niamh looked up, worried at the reaction from the audience, and tried to look over at her competitor but couldn’t see past the thick branches of the tree. 

Higher and higher Anna climbed, the box wedged into the curve of her waist beneath her outstretched arm. Then, upon reaching the top of the ladder, she loudly dumped the decorations on the top step. The labouring woman proceeded to stand half-way up the ladder, picking up each item from the box and hanging it onto a branch. Her mis-mash of decorations meant she was already meeting the criteria of the task - to have at least three different types of decorations. Whereas her competitor Niamh, having chosen to add lights, meant she was having to go around the whole tree again to add the decorations. 

The tension in the studio could be cut with a knife, both women evenly matched in their birthing progress, but Anna was taking a surprisingly clear lead in completing the challenge. 

“It's neck-a-neck on this final challenge folks, but who will come out victorious? Can both Anna and Niamh hold off from giving birth just that little bit longer…. Or will they fall at the final hurdle?”  Danny riled up the studio audience who had started chanting support for their favourite contestant. 

Anna was getting higher up the step ladder, getting closer and closer to finishing the challenge. But Niamh was faltering. Badly. She was still on the ground, trying painfully slowly to add decorations to the bottom half of the tree. To the camera she was partially hidden behind the thick branches of the Christmas tree, the odd flash of red and white from her costume coming in and out of view. Her deep, rumbling groans and grunts could be heard over the speakers, because even though she was hidden, the microphone she wore captured everything… 

“nnnghhh—!! No! Don’t— gggrhhh—” the rough husky voice of the Irish mother-to-be echoed around the studio. 

The flash of red velvet behind the tree appeared to be sinking lower and lower, heading towards the ground. Danny, wide eyed, rushed over and beckoned the cameras to follow. 

“Oh…. Niamh….” Danny said as the camera showed everyone in the audience and at home the impending mother of twins. 

Down on her knees, Niamh braced her thighs with both hands, her whole body trembling. Her ass was raised up off her heels and the round shape of a baby’s head was forming under her leggings as she pushed. 

“Nnnnghhh—!!! It’s coming out—!!!!!” Niamh wailed, and then collapsed forwards onto her hands with a cry of relief when the head, very evidently, was born. 

“That’s it folks, our fan favourite is now out of the competition.” Danny said brightly to the camera, before adding “Niamh, you should be very proud. You did amazing. You’ve set the bar extremely high for any other twin pregnancies that’s for sure.” 

Niamh remained curled over on all fours, panting as she caught her breath, the medics rushing onto the studio floor to help her deliver her twins. The camera cuts back to Danny, who strolls between the Christmas trees talking to the audience. 

“So, that leaves us with one mother-to-be left in the competition. Anna,” he called up the ladder to the last woman standing “if you can finish this challenge, you’ve done it.” 

Anna was all the way up the ladder at this point, riffling through the box of decorations and throwing them haphazardly on the top few branches of the tree. The audience cheered and yelled, supporting and encouraging the last remaining contestant as she struggled through the final hurdle. She sagged against the ladder when the decorations were done, heaving deep breaths and gripping the ladder for dear life. When she started to descend the step ladder, Danny interrupted urgently. 

“No! Anna, you still need to add the star at the top!!”

Anna looked like she was about to cry, or scream at him. Her whole body was trembling with the effort of not giving birth, the constant low rumblings from her chest as she fought the back to back contractions. With quaking hands she rummaged through the box, trying to find the star as quickly as she could. Every now and then she’d grunt involuntarily, resulting in tense gasps from the audience, the camera zooming in on her closely. 

“Come on Anna, find that star! You can do it!” Danny yelled up the ladder. She held it proudly in the air when her hands found the glittery item and proceeded to step to the very top of the ladder. As she reached the top she fiercely threw the box of decorations to the floor to stand right on the highest step. 

The whole studio was silent, breaths collectively held as they watched the labouring woman atop the ladder, stretching,  reaching up and up and up, straining to get the star on the very top of the tree. 

A wild cheer erupted as the decoration was put into its rightful place and Danny announced loudly; “YOU DID IT! Anna, you did it!! You’ve won £100,000!” 

Anna didn’t even make it back to the ground before she was actively pushing and the head came out before her feet even touched the floor. 

~ if you like & enjoy my work, please show support via my ko-fi 💜 ~

[bronx-bomber87]

Happy Wednesday my lovely readers :) We’ve reached the episode that rocked me to my very core. Honestly haven’t been this attached to a ship in a very very long time. Years passed without this level of attachment. Bringing out sides of me I didn't think existed. Like doing reviews. But our ship is something special even when they rip our hearts out. I blame Eric and Melissa LOL They are INCREDIBLE in this episode. The both of them. Brought their A game and then some.

This ep legit affected my mood for 3 weeks no joke and utterly destroyed me. I needed extra days to decompress before did my mini. The fandom was so lovely about that too. Love this fandom so much. I still don't know how I got that out tbh lol Also God Bless my bestie D for going through that with me. I got to watch it early that day which normally didn’t get to. Was usually after work. I remember D wanted to stop me but didn’t cause she couldn’t tell me why..

I had to go to a company meeting after and pretend I wasn’t devastated. Be a positive fun leader when inside I was dying. I did a good job my team had no idea lol But damn that was tough. Never been happier for a 3 week break than after this one. We all needed it. Let us begin. And thank you all again for going through this heartbreak with me. Gif count was rough for me so I fit in everything I could and made a ton.

6x06 Secrets and Lies

We start out with Lucy looking as stressed and anxious as we’ve ever seen her. Laying in bed but most definitely is not resting. The brutal toll this situation has taken becoming visible. When Tamara asks how stressed she is from 1-10? Lucy answering 19….Ooof....Could not be more relatable if she tried. When I get this laser focused I too am a nineteen. Her person has been radio silent for days. Her last contact with him was a massive knock out drag out fight.

This is the most time they’ve spent apart since they got together. Like I stated last review other than 6x01 they've scarcely been away from one another. Her UC mission in 5x21 yes but doesn’t really count. They talked every single day. So it’s truly the longest they’ve been apart. No wonder she is at a 19. Poor Lucy. Kills me. Such a wreck without him. Tamara asks if Tim is still ghosting her? Lucy tries to defend their situation. Not well but she sure tries lol

Lucy is barely keeping it together and it shows. I love that we get a shot of her pin-up board from that BTS video. The cupcake poster hehe Hopefully that makes a triumphant return in s7. Tamara doesn’t want to add to her stress... But let's her know she wants to move out. With friends from school. Worst timing ever. It makes sense but the timing is horrendous. Lucy takes so many hits this season. It’s almost worse the second time around somehow.

This time Lucy goes to an actual adult about Tim. Not useless Nolan who was painfully inept for her. Couldn’t fit it in but we see her touch her tattoo when she approaches Angela. *heart clutch* I love Melissa for doing it every time though. So subtle yet impactful. Nice little mini gut punch to start the scene. This was the right call though. If anyone knows Tim like her it’s Angela. Lucy asking if she should alert Grey? Honestly she should've but here we are. That would've been a whole other set of problems though...

Lucy feels like she’s going insane so Angela validating her helps. (at first) You know she finds this behavior of his incredibly alarming. We can see the immediate worry painted across her face. That’s her brother. She loves that man like he’s one. What sucks is that, even though Angela is empathetic, she doesn’t fulfill the needs that Lucy is going for. Which is reassurance and 'Hey let’s do this together.' A united front. Hoping since he is acting off Angela's reply would be 'Let's find out why as a team.' She is protecting her but Lucy is in a heightened emotional state and doesn't see that. Only see's being shut out further from Tim.

Angela plays her cards very close to her chest. Like a good detective would. Sadly Lucy wanted more solace than just ‘Trust him.’ That’s all she’s been doing for days. Poor woman is going out of her damn mind with worry. Even tells Angela as such. The reply she gets back not what she wanted… She wanted her detective gut and friendship. Unfortunately she just gets the former. That short lived validation she got earlier dying off quickly. Lucy is so damn upset when she takes off from the convo. Knowing if she sticks around she’s going to cry on shift. My damn heart. Melissa be killing me. Holy hell.

Angela scaring the crap out of Tim is hilarious. Serves him right tbh. This episode had me so upset and twisted, I couldn’t even enjoy scruffy Tim in a leather jacket. You know something is wrong when I can’t gawk over this man. Angela has zero trouble finding him. Because well it’s her. This is why Lucy enlisted her. She needed the best to help her. Such best friend behavior from the minute she enters his car.

Drinking his soda, calling him out, and asking WTF is going on? I adore her brazen bravery. This is why we love Angela Lopez. Willing to get herself fired for him. That she can take the hit not Lucy. I mean she’s not wrong….Angela could easily live off Wes. She would hate it but she could. It's a more viable option. Says it can be ‘Wine o’clock for her.’ LOL I always enjoy them. More of them in s7 please writers.

Tim doesn’t argue with her reasoning. Starts to explain the whole Ray debacle. Why he can’t just let him go. What he has on him. That he needs to catch him in a new crime. So he has reason to actually arrest him. Once Tim fully explains Angela just replies. ‘I’m in.’ Tim is shocked because of course he is ha Even though she is his best friend he can't believe has his back like this. Oh my broken boy. He double checks and asks if she’s sure? Her reply being the absolute best. ‘Yeah. I got your back boo.’ Hehe Lucky she’s your best friend my love.

We rejoin our bestie duo at the docks. Scoping out Ray on whatever back door deals he’s doing. She is studying Tim hard in this scene. It’s the best. Angela tries to impart some logic to Tim. Saying he’s followed Ray for two days and nothing. Asking how long he’s going to do this? Tim replying the most Tim Bradford reply. ‘As long as it takes.’ Angela is on her game today and doesn’t let him get away with it. Saying he’s just going to walk away from his job? From his relationship with Lucy? All to arrest a guy he hasn’t thought about in over a decade?

Something isn’t adding up for her and she is letting him know it. Angela gives her patented look. Knowing it’s something more. There’s a reason she’s such a good detective. Woman knows how to get to the root of things. Tim has only given her surface info at this point. Definitely not enough to justify this crusade he’s currently on. Let’s him know Lucy would understand why he lied on the report. She would even commend him for it really. We know she would. She love his soft heart so much. Tim agrees and says she would still get in trouble for knowing and not reporting him to IA.

A risk she would gladly take if you’d let her Timothy… It’s here Angela digs a little deeper. He gets a second stare. Tim finding it aggravating and telling her as such. Angela let's her next truth bomb drop. Saying he’s doing it to protect himself as much as her. That there’s something he’s not admitting. Mic drop. Nailed it and Tim knows it but won’t entertain it further. Has him dead to rights and he knows it. We then get the glorious BFF line. Like it or not she is. lmao Has your number just like your girl.

We return to Angela’s for Tim to break our hearts some more. Theme of this episode. One punch after another. Literally no time to breathe unless you check out during the other SL's. Which I did tbh.... They’re alone so she probes Tim further. Knowing that it has to be so much more than a report. He wouldn't let Ray get under his skin like this if it was that shallow. That he's bearing the weight of something on his soul. Tim gives in and begrudgingly explains what happened. That he had been squad leader most of his tour. That he was looking to move up to Sergeant First Class. Only caveat was he couldn’t have any rampant criminality in his unit.

Ray was in the way of this. Tim decided to keep it within the squad if they caught him themselves. He did an unsanctioned mission… Oh Timothy….He explains how Ray called in an air strike on them. Did this the minute he knew he was trapped. Schmuck would rather take them with him. Such a cowards move. The way Tim describes the air strike. Ugh my heart. His eyes filling up as he depicts how the world imploded around them. Eric is a master of emotion here. So expressive. Looks like he is right back there, with the most haunted look on his face. He thought he was going to die. Being so vulnerable I wanna hug him.

He and Mark were lucky though. The Humvee took the hit for them. But Henderson and Coyle were ripped apart….Ugh and now we see what he’s been bearing. That he led his men to their deaths. Their loyalty and faith in him had cost them their lives. All because Tim was in pursuit of a promotion. For personal glory. Explains why he wouldn't praise himself or take awards pre-Lucy. Or advance his career before her either. He didn’t feel he deserved anything good. Because the last time that was important to him, he got two of his men killed. Imma go cry now.... My poor broken boy. The PTSD is so real.

Eric continues to rip my heart out. Telling Angela there was so much blood. I can't imagine seeing that. They for sure thought Ray was KIA. No way he survived. It’s the way he catches his breath, tears in his eyes in this next part. I'm so upset for him. The way he points at himself when he says leadership. The failure and shame he feels for what he did. When we found out it would be his military background I was excited. I knew it would be dark though. Whatever this was. But my god. I wasn’t expecting it to be this. But makes perfect sense why he’s kept it from Lucy. He can’t bring himself to forgive what he did. How could he expect Lucy to? To still look at him like he’s the same man she fell in love with?

The deep rooted shame is evident in this scene. This is quite the weight to keep on your soul. One I’m sure he’s never told anyone. Not even Isabel about I bet. My guess is he buried it once he was state side. Like most do with trauma. Hoping it would never resurface. Sadly not how trauma goes... The way he tells the story it’s for the first time. You can tell. He’s right back there re-living it all. This scene gives us so much insight to Tim as a person. Why he is the way he is as a cop. As a person. It explains why he lost his damn mind in 2x01 over Lucy falsifying the report. Probably brought him right back there.

This is a very revealing scene. It makes sense why he shoulders things alone. It’s punishment for what he did. Doesn’t think anyone could love him enough to shoulder it with him. That breaks my damn heart. This ep makes me so emotional. *sad sigh* Nothing scarier than the person you love seeing you at your worst. With his background of abuse, it makes sense why he’s hidden this from Lucy. He doesn’t feel worthy of the comfort she would bring him. Only shame that he made a mistake. Tim is very self loathing and this is why. Coupled with his childhood it makes so much sense why he is the way he is…This one is emotionally heavy af. All his unchecked trauma barreling through like a bullet train in this ep.

Lucy arrives home and Tamara is there to take care of her. Saying she ordered pizza. I love this. She needed this. Lucy leaves the room to drop off her stuff. We hear a knock at the door and it’s Ray.... Earlier he scanned Tim’s vehicle and got Lucy’s address. Which made me sick to my stomach. I knew him grabbing it was going to end this way. Best way to get to Tim is through his heart. When Tamara opened the door and it was him..The hairs at the back of my neck stood up. Tamara calls out for Lucy. She emerges and goes into protect mode right away. Eyes on Tamara first but also hating her gun is locked up.

Heart was in my damn throat the entire time. Lucy handles herself like the bad ass we’ve all come to know and love. Commend her for keeping herself composed when she was terrified. I also adore her not putting up with any of his scare tactic BS. Her line about the only call she’s gonna make is for the ambulance. Like hot damn Lucy. Way to protect Tamara and yourself. It's true she could take his scrawny ass easily. I long to be the confident BAMF she is.

Doesn't hurt she’s still got the rage burning from being in the dark. So not only is her life being threatened now Tamara's is. This is Lucy's FINAL straw. It’s now bled over in the worst way. Not only that but she still has no idea what’s going on. We can see that mama bear come out loud and proud. It’s one thing for her to be involved it’s a whole other thing with Tamara dragged in. This is what pushes her to reach out To Tim. To cut his crap. Whatever this is has now endangered an innocent life. One she loves fiercely and will die to protect.

Lucy RAGE calls Tim and unleashes hell. As she should… Demanding to know where his ass is. Tim knowing he can’t hold her back any longer. So he lets her know. I mean Lucy is million percent done with this crap now. With his behavior, him cutting her out, all of it. So very very done. Rightfully so. I do love him answering ‘Hey, what’s wrong?’ Knowing she wouldn’t be calling unless something was. He for sure would’ve dropped it all to go to her.

But she was way too pissed to see that fact. She shows up like a bat out of hell. Biting his head off immediately saying 'Does she look ok?' No….she does not. Forever love Angela escorting Tamara out of the room. Mom and dad about to have it out so let's go. The concern all over his face kills me though. This was the last thing he wanted to happen. The very thing he was striving for by shutting her out backfired horribly. Not only did he endanger her but Tamara too.

It was Lucy’s final straw and she is showing it. These were the types of fights that are needed though. As much as this hurts she is fighting him to save them. Because he is worth the bother and effort. Just like he stated in 5x08. Asking why her and Chris never fight?They’re fighting against each other to protect one another it kills me. Also you know your ship has chemistry when even their fights are lightning in a bottle goodness. Just as amazing as their happy stuff. I can't speak enough to their fantastic on-screen chemistry. Even though this fight is fiery and hurts to watch it's hurts so good to watch them hash it out.

Tim explains who Ray is and Lucy don’t give a single fuck. It’s not who he is that has her raging. It’s him cutting her out that is. I love the movements Melissa does in this scene. I know she had an interview about her being mad. Thinking she was awkward. It wasn't at all. Was so real. I think she nailed it. Her body language is on point. How she stamps her foot. Shouting how who Ray is doesn’t explain why he iced her out. At all. She is VIBRATING with anger. Yelling at Tim to stop protecting her. Which he won't. That is like asking him to stop breathing tbh. He would rather die than not protect her. Ugh his reply of ‘ I can’t. I won’t.’ They’re at odds with the deepest part of their souls. Of who they are.

Tim will never stop protecting her. Just as she will never stop trying to help him. Been in her DNA from the jump. For him to not let her is just as painful as Tim not protecting her. *sigh* This is where their intense need to protect each other backfires so badly. Sounds romantic and sometimes it is. But in these type of moments, it shows the cracks in their already fractured communication. It real though. Communicating is HARD. Especially when you both come from abusive homes where that wasn't taught. If you aren't taught healthy communication you're just not going to do it. Simple as that. It's like a muscle that never gets used. Then when it does it feels so unnatural and painful.

These two are going to be the death of me. Hell they already have been. They have so much to work on in s7. It’s insane. I'm excited for it though. Lucy then brings up how Lopez was read in but not her. She is HIS PERSON. If anyone should be read in it’s her. Consequences be damned. Yeah Angela does have less to lose but that is NOT the point. Tim is clearly not getting that fact. I adore Lucy grabbing his hands during the end of the scene. Mirroring back she 'Can’t and won’t' not help him. Telling him she is over being to good girlfriend. He’s going to let her in NOW. Oooh lord. You Tell 'em Luce.

Their OP to foil Ray goes off without a hitch. Tim tells him it’s over. That there isn’t an air stroke to save him this time. Ray tells Tim ‘I am the air strike. I’m about to blow up your whole life.’ *grumble* It’s so true on many many levels. Watching Tim be so stoic in his IA investigation kills me. Wish could've fit this in. Eric be out here again making me emotional af two eps in a row. You can see the tears in his eyes but the rest of him is controlled. That military background of his coming in clutch.

it pains me to watch him lie and have it destroy him. I remember I saw people saying how could he lie? That’s not like him. Um no. This is very like Tim. Not to lie but to protect those he loves. If lying protects Lucy and Lopez that’s what he’s going to do. He has a history of being a little gray for those he loves. Isabel is a good example of that. All that went down with Detective Murphy was similar to this. ‘Some things matter more.’ Once again rings true with him. Tim is believed over Ray. Because even if Tim doesn’t want to believe this he is the better man.

Better reputation and Percy closes the investigation. Have missed him. But whoever he’s around it’s not good. Love the actor though. What happens after is rough to say the least. Never seen Grey as disappointed in Tim as he is here. Reprimanding him and having to report him to Pine SUCKS. R.I.P. Metro Tim. I loved you so…It’s killing Tim to have Grey look at him this way. Deeply respects him and to be scolded by him cuts him. Just dismisses Tim without further comment or fight….

God almighty the song playing in the background. I don’t even remember it. I only watched this scene once. I think I blacked out a lot in this moment. The immense shock rocked my system. Suffice to say it’s beautiful. The piano, the haunting oohs and lyrics are the perfect backdrop to this devastating scene. I felt this building anxiety watching this scene. Waiting for the hammer to drop. When she pulled him into her arms *phew* It was first breath I had taken in nearly two episodes. These eps had me on the razor's edge of sanity. I love her waiting outside for him and instantly pulling him into her arms. Just like Tim did for her in 5x22. I'm fine.....Imma cry as I write this. Horse heaven playing in my ears right now. Adding to my emotional state. These two getting me all weepy.

I’ll be honest I thought if a break up was coming, it was coming from Lucy the first time. Which is why this devastated me like it did. Having the full season in hand now. Makes total sense it’s Tim. At the time I thought would be her. But that wouldn’t be like Lucy at all. After everything he put her through. The secrets, the lies and shutting her out. She had every damn right. But she loves this man unconditionally. So unconditionally. Everything Lucy does in this scene is a reflection of that unconditional love. There to pick up his broken pieces despite all of that went down. Look at her in those gifs above.

Especially that second one. First time she took a breath too. So grateful to be here for him in this moment. I truly thought ‘Oh. Maybe we’re ok... She’s hugging him.’ Encasing him in her arms. Trying to absorb all of his hurt. Supporting him the way he sought out days previous. Gently cradling him against her. It's the tender way she nestled her fingers at the back of his head that gets me. Tapping into some ship crack for me there. *phew* Honestly thought with her being there for him they would make it out unscathed. I truly did. The chemistry from this hug is unreal btw. Tim doesn’t feel worthy in the least. The way he slumps against her. Doesn’t really hug her back like normal. Can't see Lucy is so willing to absorb his hurt and pain. To love him through this. This hug is beautifully tragic.

Lucy releases him and he looks as broken as I’ve ever seen him. 4x09 x 1000 tbh. He shirks away from her. Hands in his pocket. So disgusted and ashamed with himself. Something l've learned in Pilates is posture and the importance of it. When you stand tall and at full height. You are confident and sure of yourself. When you are slumped it presents a lack of confidence, shame, and feeling unworthy. His posture is screaming that. Like he feels he shouldn’t even be in her presence right now. He crushes me with how he says he lied about everything.

Then sarcastically almost sardonically follows it up with ‘But hey it saved my job….’ The amount of disdain in his voice is gut wrenching. The whole reason he was in this Ray mess was to further himself. To keep his career intact. He saw a promotion and went for it at all costs. What he just did lying to IA was to be that same man again. (In his mind) To put his career first over what’s right. Risked people's lives again as well. People he loves. Sickens him ten years later he’s doing the same thing all over again. Even though it's so different this time. There is still nobility in it with saving Lucy and Lopez. But this man can't see that right now. Doesn't see any good in this situation or himself.

Lucy does her best to sympathize. Telling him it was an impossible situation. If it had been her she would’ve done the same thing. Thing is if it had been for Tim yes she would’ve without question. But he can’t see the forest for the trees atm. He is drowning absolutely drowning in his self-loathing. Tim continues on with the painful self flogging. Telling her she would’ve never been in his position. Putting her on a pedestal while he makes himself very very small. That OTP line from 6x03 from him 'You could never disappoint me.' That is true. The problem is he doesn't realize he could never disappoint her either. Tragically Tim doesn't view it that way. Only sees he's not worthy.

Lucy once again tries to pick up his pieces. Telling him he thought he could handle it. He was wrong but made it right. It’s like she can sense him pulling away in this moment. Doing her best to calm his fears about himself. Trying to do what she’s always done in years past best. Build him up. Soothe him. Sadly she isn’t gaining an inch of ground with him. He is stuck in how he feels and there is no budging him. Tim is morose saying he wishes it was that easy….We can see the incredible amount hurt on his face. Telling her he just lied to two men he deeply respects. He is coming undone rapidly and Lucy can see it. I adore her putting her hands on him. Trying to right his ship.

Ground him to her in this moment. Because once again it's something she’s done so well in the past. Tim is spiraling so hard he can’t see her gesture for what it is. Tells her he just betrayed everything he thought was right about himself. *heart clutch* Lucy can’t stand him talking down about himself. Tries to interrupt but Tim won’t allow it. Lucy graciously nods and lets him get it out. Especially when he tells her how hard this is for him. She is so wonderfully understanding it makes my heart ache. Tim feels like he is a bad guy. Thought he had gotten past this and was sucked back in so easily. Truly believed he had become a better person since then. (He has) Ray was right he was gonna blow up his entire life.

He just exposed Tim for the fraud he already felt he was. Bringing his greatest sin to light. Bringing up feelings of not being deserving. Of inadequacy. His abuse background pulling into the station and not leaving. Tim is back to a place of massive self loathing. Saying he has been lying to himself for years. Thinking he’s gotten better when he hasn’t. To him he reverted back to the man he thought he left behind. Not only that he put his person. The woman he loves at risk to cover up his past. To cover up his shame. It’s hitting him like a freight train of terrible realization. Continuing on to say he can’t go back to the way it was. I was hopeful when he said ‘Right now.’ Then followed it up with maybe never….

Lucy had been nodding along. Being so wonderfully empathetic and understanding. She was with him till he said that. Then she is hit with her own terrible realization. He’s leaving her. She is losing him. In the same parking lot where he told her to take a risk. Where she expressed her concern over losing him if they did. Worried about losing the most important relationship in her life due that risk. The same spot where he told her 'Unless it is.' A giant stab to our collective shipper hearts.

It's why Lucy is in a state of utter shock. As we all were tbh. She shakily asks him if he’s breaking up with her? When he said I’m sorry. I remember having to pause. Freak out and cry. I recall chanting ‘No no no….’ To myself repeatedly. My dog was very alarmed. Because I was distraught af. I couldn't believe this was really happening. My happy place was being decimated before my eyes.

Look at the range of emotions on Tim's face before he delivers that line though. Eric you why you doing this to me? They blow this scene out the damn water. it's so visceral. and raw. He looks like he's about to have a breakdown before he delivers that line. Battling with himself about it. There's a desperate need to want to stay with her. But his self doubt and hatred wins out knowing he isn't deserving. Do I think he came out thinking he was going to do this? A little. I think the more he spoke about it and himself the decision was made. He wasn't going to be be talked off this ledge.

The way Lucy replies after this rips my heart out. This break up feels like death by a thousand paper cuts. Months later and this hurts just as much as the first time. Lucy doesn't hold back in the least. Telling Tim he doesn't get to do that. Her line about using it as an excuse is so spot on. This Ray situation has hit VERY close to home for Tim. An insanely sensitive subject for him. It's rubbed against a wound that never really healed properly. Just was buried in the back of his mind.

He doesn’t have the capacity or emotional maturity to handle it. So he ejects out as a coping mechanism. Lucy calls his ass right away for it. It’s so painful to her that he is doing this excuse. Because it feels like a crappy cheat to them. To her. It's truly a cop out and our girl deserves better than this. Especially after all they’ve been through together. All that rapport and trust they’ve built over the years. It’s an insult to who they are as a couple and the relationship they’ve developed. Sadly that all vanishes in this moment. It’s stunning Lucy and straight murdering my feels.

Her ‘That's not okay.’ is a dagger to my shipper heart. The way she continues to repeat herself cause she's in shock. Ugh.This goes down as one of the most painful breakups I've had to go through. Lucy is so upset he is going this route. Melissa had a great interview (quite a few actually.) About the lie line and using it as an excuse for Tim. She noted Lucy is upset cause how he’s acting isn’t them. That they get to have these conversations. Not only have them but recover and grow from them. It’s what she expecting from him in this moment. It's what she expected from his 5x08 Mantra going into this relationship.

She is telling him I’ve got your back. I’ve got you. What are you doing? What happened to ‘Unless it is?’ Lucy continues to vehemently disagree with him. As she should. The worst part is Tim says ‘I know.’ Like he knows what he’s doing is wrong. Knows to eject after everything isn’t ok. Yet he can’t stop himself. He is not emotionally mature enough to handle this conversation properly. Also too blinded by his own self-hatred to see the unconditional love she is showing for him in this moment. God this is painful.

Tim then comes in with the breakup line of ‘You’re an incredible person.' Lucy can’t believe this shit . She really can’t. That Tim is is doing this to her. To them. Even though Tim is being genuine with his statement. You can hear it in his voice. Doesn't do anything to soothe the wounds he's causing. Once again Melissa crushing it with the upset body language. The mannerisms are so on point. Maybe it's because I'm Italian and I use my hands when I'm upset. I do exactly what she's doing. Why I appreciate it so much. It's so real.

It's a cop out what he is doing. 'It’s not you it’s me' schtick. We see the anger building in Lucy. She can't even look at him in the second gif. For him to toss away what they have is painful enough. To do it based off a cliched excuse is destroying Lucy. Thinking what they had was worth so much more than this. Thought they worth the nasty fights. No way she knows fully what happened or she would figure out why he's really doing this. That’s what makes the rest of Lucy's replies so god damn tragic. She is trying to hold onto him for dear life. But is only being pushed away in return...

Tim continues to push forward with this breakup. Letting her know she deserves better than him. It's SO much deeper than that but it's the only way he can convey it right now. Her ‘Oh my god…’ This is her worst nightmare. Her biggest fear come to life. This is why she hesitated starting this relationship. Why she was so afraid of risking her most important relationship. It's unfolding before her eyes and she can’t stop it.

Like a bad dream she can't seem to wake up from. We all wish we could...Tim has never felt worthy of Lucy’s love, light or praise. This reaction just proves that. It's been building for a long time and this is the final result of it. It’s not logical but a trauma brain rarely is. The amount of emotional and physical abuses he endured growing up left it's mark. Has him truly convinced Lucy could never love him knowing what he did. Tim feels he does not deserve her comfort, support or love.

Punishing himself and denying what he need most because he feels unworthy. Thinks he has made a mistake so grave there is no coming back for him. No way she could love him if she knew. So he like Angela stated earlier Tim is protecting himself. Pains me to watch. Now as I've said before it's not to excuse but to explain his side of it. I understand why he's doing it even if it's fucked up.

He doesn't give Lucy much more than she deserves better. Tells her it's why he's walking away. This man feels so undeserving of the love she has to give. In his mind he thinks he’s doing her a kindness. To separate herself from such a shameful and broken man. That she could do better than him. To Tim he made the biggest sin and can’t live with himself about it. He can't envision a world where Lucy would love him through it. The tragedy is she already was in this scene.

Lucy isn’t hearing any of it. Full on panic spiral that I shared in this moment. Her ‘Don’t do this. Why are you doing this?’ Is the most soul crushing part. She can feel him slipping through her hands. Like sand rushing through her fingertips. She can’t hold onto a grain of him. Can only stand there as he gives up on them. His face in the third gif...Knife to my soul. *screams into a pillow* It's killing him to walk away from her. Eric and his expressive eyes has me bawling. The quiver in his bottom lip as well. Gah it hurts to watch them both in so much pain. It’s the way she pulls away with one hand, but is clutching his other hand for dear life, that really gets me in that last gif.

Asking him once again why are you doing this? I shared that sentiment in this moment.. Tim stands firm in his decision to end them and rip all of our hearts out. Eric had a great quote about how Tim handed this whole thing. ‘He is impulsive and he reacts instead of thinking things through. And it can come out as a bit too strong.’ He feels he is a burden Lucy therefore he is removing himself. Not thinking about the damage it’s going to do to her. The immense regret he’s going to feel when he regulates a bit more.

Something therapy has taught me is we are ruled by our nervous system. Anxiety, stress, fear etc Tim’s was haywire in this moment. All of them going off at once. Not thinking clearly. Acting out of fight or flight. He took the flight option unfortunately. The tragic way he grabs her head and gives her the saddest head kiss. Shattering all of our hearts in the process. It’s the devastated look on his face when he strokes her hair and takes off. One final gut punch from him. It's like he’s leaving behind his greatest treasure and can’t bear to be around it any longer. Lucy is clutching to him until he departs. *snifffle*

The man actually thinks she is better off without him. Truly believes that. Even if Lucy had succeeded it keeping Tim, this would've reared it’s ugly head again down the road. This breakup ruined my friggin life. I kid you not. They were my happy place. My consistent happy place. And now that was gone. It affected my mental health a little too not gonna lie. I think I was in mourning for three weeks. Honestly I still am. Low key will be till they're fixed. Those three weeks were unbearable. But also needed. Thank you again to my bestie D for being my mourning partner through out that. Kept me sane.

That being said I think this will push them in the best direction. A healthier and stronger one. I truly believe that. I recently broke up with a friend who I had been friends with for ten years. It was very hard on me but time. Boundaries were being pushed and it wasn't healthy anymore. My therapist pointed me to a wonderful book called ‘Goodbyes and good boundaries. ’ While It helped heal my heart it also has really good pieces in it. Stuff made me think of this very ep tbh. Sure that wasn't her goal LOL But my brain is always in a Chenford state of mind in some way or another.

First one that made me think of them. ‘Health cannot bond to unhealth.’ As much as it wasn’t fair for Lucy. And god it wasn’t after everything else this season. Tim was in such a radioactive state staying with her wouldn’t have worked anyway. He was radiating turmoil. Lucy can do a lot for him but not this. He NEEDED therapy so much. There are things you learn in there that only your therapist can help you with. He was unhealth and Lucy was trying to keep her empathetic healthy self to him. It was never going to work. Not unless Tim put in some work. Which he couldn't at this point in time.

“Relationship often die not because of conversations never had but rather conversations needed but never had.” Another good one made me think of them. Tim was not ready in the least for the adult conversation required of him in this moment. Or their entire relationship really. They both danced around the issues a lot. 6x02 closest we got. Even then it was one sided. Thus them dying in this moment. Despite Lucy’s damndest to keep them afloat. Remind him of what they’re fighting for. Of why they started this. This breakup was painful af. Despite how this wrecked my world it’s going to be good for them in the long run.

I will say Lucy in that last gif was all of us in that moment. It was a soul crushing moment that decimated this fandom. Still blows my mind Melissa and Eric were surprised just how insanely devastated we were. Why they did those lovely posts during the three weeks. To thank us and to hold on. Growth is coming. They’re going to be even better after this. Doesn’t mean this didn’t hurt like a SOB and won’t long after they reunite. Curse you Eric and Melissa. You are incredible to evoke such emotions out of us all.

Thank you for going through this with me again. It wasn’t easy but they always worth it. Appreciate any and all comments, likes or reblogs I get. I shall see you all in 6x07 :)

Side notes non chenford

Balian doing the creepy bed thing again. Just have to note that.

Also can’t believe they didn’t end the ep with their breakup. There is a whole minute or so of I don’t give a shit after that scene. I was so distraught they could’ve had Nolan walk into a wall and I wouldn't have noticed.

[the-cinnamontography-is-amazing]

SAS Rogue Heroes S2 E2 thoughts:

-Will never get over Paddy waxing poetics two seconds before blowing something up.

-Ooof that shot with Paddy swimming, floating next to the dead German solider. That's ✨cinnamontography🤌🏻✨

-Did not trust that priest either, I was assuming he would be an Axis spy, but I guess Italian mafia.

-I've only had Alessia for five seconds but if anything HAPPENS TO HER...

-Okay what is Eve doing? None of it makes sense except ya know the age old problem of having a female character be in service of a man. Why the fuck would De Gaulle be like "go visit your BF in an Italian prison". Girl should be preparing the Maquis or something... idk. I'm annoyed with Eve not because of her specifically, but annoyed with the writers doing this to her.

-I just really enjoy the growth of all the guys, and each of them starting to battle the psychological part of fighting a war.

-I really like how they are showing how resistance movements are often messy. Alessia noting she is a communist, and basically 'the enemy of my enemy', etc. History often has this view that in the countries under occupation, all banded together all hunky dory and *fought* together! It's always much more complicated than that. Group dynamics and identities always out last a war.

-Which brings me to Paddy's distrust of the priest, mafia, etc. Sure if he hadn't blown his top, they might have initially gotten along, but just because they were allies in the present, doesn't negate support in the future when it might be really vital.

-However Pat Riley, the prevailing American voice, and his basic fuck no, I'm not making enemies of Al Capone was very amusing.

-"The ghost of that Catholic boy that you left buried in the desert." 😭😭 CRYING THROWING UP. I love you Jim Almonds

And I'll end with this.... Jack O'Connell in a sweaty tank top looks great, but Jack O'Connell in a leather jacket?? Damn.😮‍💨

[arctrooper69]

Mysterious Ways

An unfortunate accident could have very fortunate consequences.

A/N: First of my @clonexreaderbingo fics! For the "Cody" square 🥰

Warnings: Accidental nudity mentioned? Embarrassing situations?

--------------------------------------------------

"Fives! Fives! Echo!" You dashed down the hall of the Resolute, trying to get their attention. The two clones spun around, raising an eyebrow at your panicked expression.

"Commander?!" Echo sounded concerned.

You paused to catch your breath.

"I...I need your help with something!"

Fives smirked and crossed his arms, "Must be something pretty important."

Your face turned red. "Uh well....so you see..." You scratched the back of your neck nervously.

Echo sighed, rolling his eyes, "Oh no, what did you do?"

"Ok, so I need you guys to distract Commander Cody so that I can grab his datapad and delete a few things."

Fives looked confused.

Echo pinched the bridge of his nose. "Again, what did you do!?"

You sighed and looked at the ground. Your feet had suddenly become very interesting. "Uhm...well..." You coughed. Fives was leaning up against the wall clearly invested in whatever your reasoning was.

"So uhm...I was working with Commander Cody the other day and I was a little late with the reports. So this morning he asked me to send him the reports. So I did. Or at least I thought I did. Then I realized I'd clicked on the wrong file and sent him....not my reports."

You could feel the embarrassed heat burning through your face, threatening to consume you. Part of you wished it would. Then you wouldn't have to deal with this.

The boys were silent for a minute.

"So what'd you send him?" Echo asked, furrowing his brow, "It couldn't have been that bad."

"Uhh...yeah... So I had some photos on my datapad...."

"Holy shit, you didn't!" Fives' mouth dropped open; his face filled with a combination of shock and glee.

You looked up at him in horror and nodded slowly.

"You mean you sent Marshal Commander Cody your nudes!?" He cackled.

"Shhhh!" You tried to shush him. "Don't say it out loud! I didn't mean to!"

"Siths Hells..." Echo sighed, running a hand down his face. The muscles in his jaw quivered as he fought in vain to keep the corners of his lips from curling up into an incredulous grin - a mischievous twinkle in his eye.

You hopped back and forth nervously from one foot to the other, "So....are you gonna help me or not?"

"Yeah I....ooof" Fives began and was cut off, catching Echo's elbow in the gut.

"What was....oh...shit..." Fives turned his eyes to the hall behind you. His grin got even wider.

"Oh this oughta be good."

"What...?" you raised an eyebrow in confusion, turning your head to see what had gotten his attention. General Kenobi strolled down the hall accompanied by none other than the Marshal Commander Cody himself, datapad in hand.

"Welp....we gotta go!" Echo said quickly, dragging his brother by the arm. You shot him a panicked look.

"No, no don't...!" You whispered harshly, begging them, but with a quick salute to the General, they were already well on their way down the hall.

Traitors. You muttered under your breath. You didn't have to use the Force to feel the breath hitch in the Commanders throat as the two paused before you.

He knew. Oh Force. He knew.

"Master Kenobi," you bowed, respectfully acknowledging the Jedi Master. He replied in kind, saying nothing else, but if you could feel the tension in the hall, then he certainly could.

You nodded with a professional stiffness towards the clone. "Commander."

He replied with a curt nod of his own. "Commander."

You were glad his helmet was on, preventing you from seeing the look on his face.

After a brief moment that seemed to last an eternity, the pair continued down the hall resuming their conversation.

You let out a breath you didn't realize you'd been holding.

Oh Force, I need a drink.

A ping from your com interrupted your thoughts and you looked down. A message from Fives:

79's tonight?

Sounds good. I need a drink.

Great. See you there!

****

79's was already packed by the time you made it down to the clone bar. Both the 501st and the 212th were on shore leave for a few days - a rare occurrence but well deserved. The war was going well for once. You took a seat in a booth close to the bar waiting for Fives and his brother, taking in the chaotic but familiar scene. The air smelt like stale beer and cheap cologne. It'd been awhile since you'd last been out to a place like this.

"So! Tell us all about it." Fives slid into the booth behind you. You jumped, so caught up in your own thoughts that you hadn't noticed the pair of them come over.

"Yeah, how awkward was it?" Questioned Echo, sitting down on the other side of you. "Did he say anything?"

You shook your head. "Nope. And hopefully he never will!"

Fives cracked a grin. "The General definitely knew though."

"No. No he did not!" You leaned forward, forcefully pointing your finger at him.

Echo grinned as he crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back into the booth. "Oh yeah. He totally did. He's got the whole Jedi thing going for him."

"Hey!" You protested, "I'm a Jedi too!"

Fives laughed. "Yeah but you weren't subtle...like.... at all. Even if he doesn't know exactly what's up, he definitely knows something was weird between the two of you."

"And besides that," Echo chimed in, "Cody is General Kenobi's second in command. They probably know each other pretty well."

You sighed and ran a hand down your face, chuckling at the absurdity of the whole situation.

"If this was supposed to make me feel better, you failed miserably."

Echo patted your shoulder and took a another drink.

Fives downed the rest of his own. "Besides, I'm pretty sure Cody didn't mind." He winked.

You choked and Echo smacked you on the back, simultaneously kicking Fives under the table.

"You know what? I think I'm gonna get us some more drinks!" You stood up suddenly, and nodded to yourself. "Yep. More drinks."

Sighing to yourself, you made your way over to the bar. If Commander Cody had feelings for you, did that make this whole thing better or worse?

A clone made his way over to the bar, the yellow in the shoulder bell of his armor caught your eye and you turned.

Oh no. Out of all places, of course you'd find him here. You turned to run, ready to slip away unnoticed into the crowd of rowdy patrons but it was too late. He'd already noticed you. You could tell he was trying hard to ignore you, but when you turned away, you could feel his eyes burning through the back of your head.

Curious, you turned so that you could see him out of the corner of your eye. Just enough to gauge his reactions but not enough to make it seem like you were staring at the Marshal Commander.

You glanced over at him and he seemed to have the same idea. He stood frozen, eyes locked with yours. It felt impossible.

"Can I take your order, miss?" The bartender waved her hand in front of your face. You glanced over at her impatient expression. You rolled your eyes, both annoyed at her interruption and thankful that you now had a chance to run from it all.

"No thanks!" You called to her over your shoulder as you slipped from the barstool into the crowd of patrons. A pit formed in your stomach. Now you just wanted to go home - away from the embarrassment you'd be sure to face once confronted by the Marshal Commander.

"Wait!" He called out, walking briskly after you, pushing through a crowd of his drunk brothers paying no attention to their annoyed grumbling.

"Will you please just wait!?"

You paused, stepping into an unoccupied supply room. A gloved hand caught the door before you could swing it closed. He ran his fingers through his hair, dislodging a few errant strands from his professionally kempt military cut.

There was a difference, you realized, between Cody and the Marshal Commander rank he embodied. It was a very fine line, but a difference all the same. It was Cody whose gloved hands gave way to calloused fingers and nails that were subconsciously chewed too short. It was Cody whose face was creased by furrowing lines of concentration and concern.

It was the Marshal Commander's dark and stern eyes that gave way to Cody's subtle spark of kindness.

"Cody...." You began, unsure of what to even say. You knew now, how you felt towards this man.

He held up a hand and you paused.

"I just have to ask you one thing..." he took a breath. "Did you mean to send me those pictures?"

You breathed out a laugh. "No. Not exactly." You paused, glancing up to meet those warm, honey brown eyes. "But I'm glad I did."

"I don't think we'd have ever done this if you hadn't."

Done what? You were about to say, but Cody's mouth violently answered the unspoken question as he pressed his lips into yours.

"The Force works in mysterious ways" you panted as he pulled away, only to pull you right back into his arms.

Thank you @staycalmandhugaclone for beta reading this!

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[desertdollranch]

Earlier this month, American Girl re-released a whole lot of long-retired stuff from Kit Kittredge’s collection. 

Kit herself never actually went anywhere. There was just nothing to buy for her. Doll, book, and that was it. But it’s the 20′s now, and AG is slowly turning the focus back to the historical characters. They’ve finally acknowledged that Kit is an icon and deserves to have the nice things that we all so desperately want to give her.

I was looking at the new stuff on the Wiki because I was curious to see if there were any changes made to anything. It’s part of the “homework” I do for the purposes of doll blogging. While doing that, I noticed that the page for each product mentions how much each item originally cost, alongside what it costs now. 

For example: Kit’s school outfit.

This was first sold for $22 when it was released in 2000, along with the first half of Kit’s debut collection. Now they’re charging $38 for it, an increase of $16 or 72%. I thought that sounded a little excessive, even if 2000 really and truly was more than twenty years ago and inflation has gone wild since the pandemic began three years ago.

So I ran the numbers through the inflation calculator operated by the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics. 

Look at that. It’s basically spot on. $22 in 2000, adjusted for inflation, is equivalent to $38.23 in 2023. I’ve been proven wrong.

I did the same calculation for her birthday dress and her pajamas, and those were both pretty much the same, since they were and still are similar in cost to the school outfit. 

Now for her cute little scooter, made from a box of California oranges.

This was a later addition to her collection, coming along in 2006 for the price of $24. In 2023 it is now being sold for $50, a $26 or 108% increase. Let’s see how that tracks when adjusted for inflation. 

Ooof. $24 in 2006 should only be $35.70 in today’s money, or $14.30 less than what it’s actually being sold for. So if this one feels a little overpriced, then it probably is, assuming that the materials and quality are the same. Both versions are made of faux wood, which means that the recently skyrocketing price of wood won’t affect this. Maybe there’s another increased cost somewhere that I’m not aware of. Or maybe AG has added a small nostalgia tax, a sort of “buy it from us or pay big bucks to someone selling it secondhand” reminder.

Another accessory that was brought back was Kit’s school lunch.

This set includes her metal lunchbox, an embroidered napkin, a cheese sandwich, an oatmeal raisin cookie, apple slices, and for some reason.... three whole entire raw carrots. (There’s nothing wrong with carrots, but like. When’s the last time you’ve even seen an adult eat three whole carrots for lunch. Carrots are huge.)

Anyway. It was sold for $16 when it was released in 2000, and now they’re selling it for $36, a $20 or 125% increase.

$16 in 2000 would be equivalent to $27.80, so her lunch set is overpriced by $8.20, assuming the cost of materials/labor have risen proportionally. 

And finally, Grace the dog. Named for her distinct lack of grace and adorable clumsiness. Sold for $16 when she was released with the second half of Kit’s debut collection. Now selling for $28 which is an increase of $12 or 75%.

A 75% increase is very similar to Kit’s school outfit selling at a $72% increase, so my guess was that this is going to be a more reasonable price hike.

Adjusted for inflation, $16 in 2001 is now equivalent to $27.30, so Grace is in fact underpriced by 70 cents! Personally I think AG charges a bit too much for all of their doll pets, but that’s just me.

All of this was really surprising to me. Inflation happens so quietly in everyday life. It’s only been really noticeable in the last three years, when it seems like everything has shot up in price. 

The inflation calculator goes all the way back to 1913. Now if you really want to see what those small changes look like after 90 years, check out how much a $150 doll like Kit herself would have cost in 1932, when her stories began: 

You’d only need $6.71 in your pocket to bring Kit home. Imagine that. 

[melanieph321]

Ruben Dias - Lost in Sardinia Part 5/8

Ooof, this chapter. 😮‍💨

It's a long read and I received some great advice following the last chapter, on how to use the correct warnings for chapters that are explicit or triggering in anyway.

I don't think this chapter need any warnings, other than that it deals with anxiety and confrontation.

Summary - Ruben is on a getaway in Sardinia. There he meets a girl named Fiorella. She starts to wonder why Ruben won't tell her what exactly he is getting away from, or even what his real name is.

Enjoy!

Fiorella stood in front of the mirror, adjusting the straps of her bridesmaid dress. Chiara's dress fitting happned at a beauty parlor in town, the owner of the parlor was a seamstresses who happened to be a dear friend of Nonna's.

"What is this Chiara? Are you having a wedding or a funeral?" Sophia studied her bridesmaids dress in the mirror, looking very displeased with the choices Chiara had made for them.

"Don't be bitter just because the dress has no cleavage." Chiara chuckled. She came up behind Fiorella, resting her chin on her sisters shoulder. "How do you like the dress Rella?"

"It's fine."

Chiara frowned. "Just fine?"

Fiorella raised her head, realizing that she had been drifting away. "I mean it's perfect Chiara, it's really pretty."

"Don't lie now Fiorella. The two of us can still vote for another dress."

"You wouldn't?" Chiara gasped.

"Watch me." Sophia challenged. "I'll tell Miss Bedotti right now."

"No you won't. Get back here Sophia!"

The two of them ended up chasing each other around the beauty parlor. Fiorella kept tugging at her dress in front of the mirror. She had to agree with Sophia on this one, she wasn't feeling the dress. Not because it showed too little skin, the opposite really. Fiorella's eyes fell upon the reflection staring back at her, she couldn't shake off the feeling that the dress showed too much skin, making her feel exposed and vulnerable.

"Okay, fine." Sophia surrendered, sruggling to catch her breath. "Since it's your wedding and all, I guess I can compromise on wearing an ugly dress. It's only for one day, right?"

"Geee Sophia, how generous of you."

The the two of them returned to the big mirror where Fiorella stood.

"It settled, you're wearing the dress." Chiara said victoriously.

"Great."

"Fiorella, what's with you?" Chiara met her sisters reflection, expressing her concern. "Why have you been so down lately?"

"Haven't you heard." Sophia fell back against one of the leather sofas. She reached for the tray of pastries placed on the table before her.

"Heard what?"

"Fiorella has fallen for some tourists in town. I'm assuming it's not working out so well."

"Is this true?" Chiara said, turning back to meet her sister gaze in the mirror.

"Apparently he's some kind of big shot hiker from Portugal. What was his name again, Rory?"

"Ruben." Fiorella hissed. "His name is Ruben."

Fiorella told her sister about her troubles in confidence. After what happned with Ruben on his boat she hadn't been able to shake the nasty feeling in her gut, the feeling that what happned between them wasn't right, and so she told her sister about it, or at least about the mixed emotions that she had.

"Why am I informed about this now?" Chiara said, hurt to be the last one to know about Ruben.

"Well for starters, you're never here." Sophia picked at somthing stuck between her teeth. "How could you possible know anything that's happening in our lives if you're never here?"

"Don't start Sophia." Chiara sighed. Her attention was brought back to Fiorella. "Tell me everything about him, where did you guys meet? Is he cute? Is he old?"

"He's older than me, yes. But only by a few years."

Fiorella had actually forgotten to ask Ruben his age. She even tried to do a background check on him, but she couldn't find anything googling the name Ruben Sanchez, adding 'hiking' as a reference. The hiking community must not be that big.

"I would love to meet him." Chiara said, cheerful as ever. "I know! You should invite him to the wedding, as your date."

"What?"

"What?

Fiorella and Sophia seemed to agree that Chiara's suggestion was a bad one.

"Why not?" She insisted.

"Well I don't really know him that well." Fiorella said. "We've only gone out once."

"Go out again. Make sure to ask him then."

"Chiara you're such a fool." Sophia said, rolling her eyes. "Fiorella is clearly not that into the guy, right sis?"

"Like I said..." Fiorella straightened her dress. "We've only gone out once."

********************************************

A day passed.

Fiorella still hadn't gone for a swim at the docks since her night with Ruben. In a way she was avoiding him. He did know where she lived though, so it wasn't like he made an effort to get in touch with her either. Perhaps Sophia was right, the best thing would be to forget about him entirely. What he wanted from her she didn't feel comfortable giving to him. It had just come as suprise, a surprise that Ruben wasn't who she thought he was.

"Acqua!" Fiorella's little brother exclaimed. The two of them eagerly made their way to their local beach in Sardinia.

Compared to the docks, the beach swarmed with tourists, however, the sun shone brightly overhead, casting a golden hue on the crystal-clear waters. It was the perfect day for an adventure, and Fiorella had been longing to swim again.

With her snorkel gear in hand, she led Dino to the water. She took it upon herself to teach him how to dive for clams. She taught him the basics of diving down and scouring the sandy ocean floor for the elusive clams. With each successful find, Dino's face lit up with joy and curiosity. Though they only managed to catch a few, Fiorella reveled in the moment, making memories with her brother that would last a lifetime.

As they made their way back to the shore, clam shells clutched in their hands, Fiorella's heart skipped a beat. There, standing near the edge of the beach, was Ruben. He wore shorts, no shirt. His hair and torso damped with sweat. He looked to have just returned from a hike up the mountains near the coastline. Ruben's eyes widen as he recognized Fiorella. Spotting her, he raised his hand, waving for her attention. 

"Fiorella."

He said her name with such longing, as if the two of them had gone a year without seeing each other.

"I've been wondering where you've been."

Impossible, she thought. She had been home, on the farm. Where else would she go? Her sister was getting married, Fiorella was pretty sure that she had shared that with Ruben. Either way, her cheeks flushed with a mix of surprise and pleasure. She hadn't expected to see Ruben again so soon.

"I've been taking my little brother Dino snorkeling for clams," she explained, gesturing towards Dino, who flashed Ruben a toothy grin.

Ruben looked impressed. "Snorkeling for clams? That sounds like quite the adventure!" He was leaning towards Dino when he said this. Dino who proudly showed off his catch of the day, two palourde clams, clutched in his tiny little hand.

"You caught those by yourself?" Ruben asked, brightly.

Dino eagerly nodded his heads.

"How impressive."

"Give him one." Fiorella said, nudging Dino towards Ruben.

With his hand out, Dino heaved up to his toes, trying to hand the giant that was Ruben his clams. Ruben met him halfway way, crotching down in the sand before him.

"Thank you." He smiled, accepting the clams from Dino.

Fiorella's head tilted as Ruben stood. He noticed the sun irritating her eyes and moved to block it with his body.

"Have you been busy, with your sisters wedding and all?" He asked.

So he was aware.

"Not that busy." She muttered.

Ruben's eyes search her face, perhaps not sure of what to make of the distance in her gaze.

"If you aren't too busy with the wedding...." Ruben scratched the back of his head. "I'd like to see you again, to maybe..." His eyes shifted to Dino then back to Fiorella. "...maybe talk things over?"

Fiorella nodded, she wanted to talk. She needed to talk. "I might be free tonight."

"Well...you know where to find me." He shrugged.

Fiorella nodded. Her and Dino then bid their farewell.

Returning home Fiorella had a decision to make and it was either gonna make things better or worse.

********************************************

"We'll be waiting for you right here Fiorella, don't worry."

"Will you shut up." Sophia hissed.

Fiorella had told her sisters about meeting up with Ruben again. She had also expressed some of her worries about him, mostly the fact that he was some what a stranger to her.

Chiara volunteered to accompany Fiorella to the docks, which seemed like a sensible move for a big sister. Sophia, however, had her own agendas for coming. She said it was mainly to see how ugly Ruben was.

"Just give us a call if somthing goes wrong." She said, holding Pluto in his leash.

The presence of the three of them calmed Fiorella's nerves as she made her way to the docks, towards Ruben's boat.

As she stepped onto the sleek white vessel, Ruben greeted her with a smile. "Fiorella, it's so good to see you," he said, his voice filled with exuberance. "I've missed you."

Fiorella nodded, forcing a half-hearted smile. She followed him onto the deck, taking in the panoramic view of the marina. The afternoon sun reflected off the tranquil waters, casting a warm glow on the surroundings. Fiorella's uneasiness began to subside as the memories of how she and Ruben first met returned to her. It gave her hope that maybe they could work thinks out, that that night was simply a misunderstanding.

Her hopes were shattered though, when Ruben released the boat from its stationary ties and steered it away from the docks. Panic surged through Fiorella as she realized they were leaving the safety of the harbor and venturing out into the vast expanse of the ocean. Her heart raced, and she stumbled backward.

"Ruben, what are you doing?" she cried out, her voice barely audible over the sound of the engine. "I thought we were going to talk things over, not go sailing."

Ruben turned to face her, an enigmatic smile playing on his lips. "Fiorella, trust me. We need this."

Fiorella's fear turned into anger. She had agreed to meet Ruben under the assumption that they would have a conversation, not get trapped on a boat with him alone. Her mind raced, searching for a way to assert her independence and regain control of the situation. She could scream, her sisters could hear her and alert the police. They were drifting away fast though. Too far away for her sisters or anyone else to hear her scream.

"I didn't agree to this, Ruben," she said firmly, her voice filled with determination. "You can't force me to be here. Take me back to the docks right now."

Ruben's smile wavered slightly, but he kept his hands on the wheel and continued steering the boat farther from the shore. "Fiorella, please. Just give me a chance. I believe we can still make things right."

Anxiety flooded Fiorella's mind as the boat sailed further into the endless blue waves. She searched her surroundings desperately, seeking any opportunity to escape and find safety. But miles away from land, there was no one to hear her cries, and no means of escape.

As the magnitude of her situation sunk in, Fiorella realized that running away from Ruben was no longer an option. She had to confront him, face her fears. With newfound determination, she looked Ruben in the eye and spoke with unwavering conviction. "Ruben, I can't change the past, and I can't predict the future," she said, her voice steady. "But I do know that I cannot be with someone who forces me into situations I'm uncomfortable with. If we are to have any chance at all, it must be based on trust, mutual respect, and open communication. Take me back to the docks, or I will find a way to get off this boat myself."

Ruben's expression softened, and he finally acknowledged the seriousness of Fiorella's words. He nodded reluctantly and steered the boat back toward the direction of the marina.

Fiorella felt a sense of relief wash over her. She knew that her confrontation with Ruben was a crucial turning point, and she had reclaimed a small part of herself that she thought she had lost.

As they approached the harbor, Ruben docked the boat just outside of the reef. Fiorella felt more relaxed knowing she was no longer trapped in the middle of the ocean. And now, if things went really south, she could always jump ship and swim back to shore.

"Ruben." Fiorella ran a hand down her face. "What happened that night, If that's the kind of stuff you're into...."

"It's not."

"You sure, because you seem pretty fucking into it."

"I know Fiorella, but I made a mistake. I'm really sorry."

"I'm not looking for an apology Ruben. I'm just here making myself clear. To me that can never happen again, not now, not ever."

"If I could take what happened back, I would. But the truth is...."

"What?"

"The truth is that...."

"What is it Ruben, just say it."

"Look." He sighed. "I've made some mistakes, alot of mistakes that I have been trying to do right ever since I got here. Then one day you showed up and I started forgetting about my mistakes, the fact that I've jeopardize alot of things in my life for not dealing with my own baggage.

Fiorella folded her arms, indicating that she was listening.

"Meeting you, I wouldn't say it was a mistake, but it was selfish of me to get you involved in my shit. We should have never gone on that hike and I should have never brought you home with me that night. It's a mistake I'll never be able to undo. But trust me when I say that I regret it more than anything, and that I'll understand if you never want anything to do with me again."

A minute of silence.

"I need some time...." Fiorella said.

"Of course, take all the time you need."

And with that he let her go.

As they docked the boat, Fiorella thanked Ruben for bringing her back. Without another word, she stepped onto the solid ground and returned to her sisters.

"Oh my god was that him? Where did he take you?"

They ambushed her with questions, questions that Fiorella didn't have the strength to answer right now.

"He was hot wasn't he? Look at the picture I took when he helped you onto his boat."

Fiorella's eyes couldn't focus on the screen Chiara flashed before her eyes. Her thoughts were elsewhere.

Ruben had alot of baggage, she thought. Things that he wasn't and perhaps would never tell her about. Fiorella asked if what they had for a brief moment was worth fighting for? Was it worth getting involved with someone whom she knew was keeping things from her? In her current state Fiorella felt that it probably wasn't worth it.

[newtonsheffield]

Anthony Bridgerton and Kate Sharma in take a deep breath and jump (then fall) by newtonsheffield (Moomin_94)

Anthony sighed as he sat on the curb outside his shop, just like always, his coffee in hand stretching his back out. He heard the engine before he saw it and lifted his head as the small van pulled to the curb. A woman got out from behind the wheel her curly hair bouncing as the skirt of her dress twirled around her a little and Anthony’s stomach dropped. Just the tiniest bit as her eyes fell on him.

Her brow furrowed as she stepped forward, her voice smooth, “Are you alright, sir?”

He looked behind him, half expecting to see someone behind him but there was no one there. He stood, smoothing back his hair and lifting his sunglasses, “Yeah, are you? No offence but girls like you are usually pretty fucking lost at a tattoo parlour.”

The woman who’d gotten out behind her laughed, leaning against the side of the van but the woman in front of him raised her eyebrow, her eyes travelling down to the hand he’d wiped against his leather pants and held out to her, “I’m not lost. We just leased the shop front next door.” She pointed at it, “We’re florists.”

She took his hand and he felt the swoop in his stomach again as their skin met, her smooth skin looking a little odd next to his, covered in ink. “I’m Anthony.”

“Kate.” She said, stepping back towards the shop front, “Don’t worry, I’ll stay out of your way. And I don’t think I need to worry about you getting lost my way. You don’t strike me as the sort of guy who buys a lot of flowers.”

He stared at her, as she walked away, watching the sway of her hips and the swish of her hair as the scent of her perfume hung in the air around him. She was exactly the sort of girl he usually stayed away from when he saw them in pubs. Girls who knew what they wanted, and weren’t willing to settle for anything less. But all he wanted, every time he saw her in the next month, was to throw her off her game. So when he saw it open one morning, his head still pounding a little, wearing yesterday’s outfit he went in, winking at her as he ordered flowers for the woman whose bed he’d just left. He watched with a little satisfaction as she disgustedly pushed his phone back towards him with her pen when he couldn’t remember the woman’s name and had to show her the contact, delicately cleaning the pen with a sanitising re she carried on.

“Do you think Miss BigTits will be very offended if I leave off her last name on the envelope?”

He could tell it offended her, that he didn’t care what the flowers were and he couldn’t remember the woman’s name that he’d spent the night with and part of him enjoyed the way it rankled her, the snide little remarks she tossed at him, so he kept going back. Every time a different woman. He Kept needling at her. Until it was all he thought about. Until he woke up thinking about her and went to bed thinking about her and all he wanted was to reach forward and tug her against his chest and let his teeth bite at her neck as their hips rocked together.

But fuck him, she’s the last person he wants to see sitting in the corner of the pub that night, a little tipsy already as she calls him over to her.

“Why are men so fucking awful?”

“I’m sorry?”

“The guy I went out with.” Kate sighed, gesturing for the bartender to pour Anthony a pint and two shots. “You need to catch up to me. The guy I’ve been talking to, or like one of them, we went out and he asked me if I’d be open to having a threesome.”

Anthony’s stomach lurched, “well, I guess maybe he-”

“With my sister.”

“Ooof.” Anthony said, downing his drink, “yeah That’s fucking bad.”

“I just- I want to meet someone, I want to fall in love! My parents are so in love and I want that and I don’t think I should feel bad for trying to get it.”

Anthony nodded, her wide eyes catching his until he had to look away from her, his chest tight. “You shouldn’t.”

“But I like sex too! Men are just such… fucking arseholes about it!”

And he knew he shouldn’t have said it, but he couldn’t help himself, with her leg brushing his and her fucking perfume hanging in the air and her hair brushing his chest. “Well, I’m not what you’re looking for but we can fuck if you like. Promise I won’t be an arsehole about it.”

And when he walks into her shop the next morning, with the marks from her fingernails burned into his back and the taste of her still on his tongue he knows what a mistake he’s made when she snaps at him the second he walked in

“No! You are not permitted to buy flowers here today!”

Because he still can’t stop thinking about her.

For @jeanvanjer

[tennessoui]

hi kit! long time no see lol jk I spend so much time on your blog and ko-fi its not even funny (in a nice non-stalkerish way I promise) I subscribed to your kofi and was wondering if you planned on continuing any of those AUs or were they meant to be sorta one shots? because I *literally* cannot stop thinking about healer anakin going about this day with that brightest blue silk blindfold?? oh all the potential for pining and hurt/comfort and ALL THE ANGST here?? ooof pls I need more - 🦊

hiii kit it's 🦊 again I am back because I just had an epiphany about the healer anakin AU I am obsessed with currently. so is the blindfold like a hijab where your close family (so other healer peers in private I suppose?) and your significant other is able to see you with the blindfold off? I started thinking that keeping it on 24/7 is probably not ideal and there has to be some time that it comes off, and who gets to see you then.. I am south asian so I kinda dig this tbh! 😊 (2/2)

hello hello this is such an interesting ask!! for the first part, i'm really not sure - i think there are fics on ko-fi that i would love to expand and write more for (the healer anakin au being one of them) but at the same time, i think while i am running the ko-fi fic thing, then those stories need to exist only on there - or i need to talk to everyone who supports me monthly on there and see if they would be ok with me posting those stories somewhere else (like on ao3 or tumblr) and expanding on them more. as of right now, they're really just one shots that act a bit like slices of life in the au - just enough information that the characterizations are apparent and just enough setting and premise that it feels like a story but overall stand alone

but yes i too am sorta obsessed with the idea of healer skywalker showing up to healer functions with a bright blue silk bandana over his eyes while everyone else has the standard issue gray or white cloth. of course they wouldn't know, but just imagine like. mace windu attends to give a debrief of the next few battle plans and anakin is just...sticking out like a sore thumb lol

as for the second part, in my mind i'm sort of waving the logistics of keeping the blindfold on for long stretches of time because im leaning more into the fantasy side of star wars tbh - i think it's more angsty as a concept if healers sort of...give their eyes away forever/until they retire and never open them. they change the bandages and shower without them on, but the force is supposed to act as their eyes for menial daily tasks like telling apart shampoo from conditioner and cooking (and they just get used to it)

like that feels so much more angsty because obi-wan will never ever get to see anakin's eyes again and he has to just. make his peace with that which he's obviously struggling to do in the ficlet on ko-fi. he has to figure out how to love anakin as he is, with his vows, or he won't get him at all and obi-wan wrestling with that is a key part of the ficlet. im not sure how strongly that angst would hit if they could reach a certain point of closeness and then he could get anakin the way he had him when they were in the creche, sight and all you know? he needs to accept who anakin is to really have a chance at loving him without getting some other version of him back

but that being said i also do dig the idea of the blindfolds being taken off in the company of one's family or loved ones and am open to it--it explains a lot of logistical questions for sure lol

i just also really like the angst and acceptance that comes from the idea that obi-wan must become ok with never seeing anakin's eyes again....only for anakin, who loves him so much, to break his vows because obi-wan is dying and needs him or obi-wan is dying and asks to see his eyes one last time (only for obi-wan to categorically survive)

[thatbuddie]

omg can we talk about eddie dancing?? 😭😭 that's my silly little GOOF!!! i love him omg my baby

but also can we talk about bobby standing on top of the truck in the last shot of the trailer....that has to be the hottest thing i've ever seen!!! also it looks soooo good in general!!! real television is back!!!

the dancing scene.... hen serving, eddie being so silly, chimney being so adorable ksksksksks like please look at the chimney moves i beg you they're my favorite.

no pls i am not ready to talk about bobby on top of the firetruck... he's... ooof... i can't.... i would be banned from this website...

[quitealotofsodapop]

Song reaction was kinda interesting. Hm... Just a thought in Steven Universe was great to see how the Wukongverse thinks of it

OOOF

"Here Comes a Thought" is such a good song and scene that I ended up thinking about the different Wukongs put into that scenario of having to examine their personal flaws/demons in a mindscape. Ofc with their thoughts and memories manifesting as butterflies.

The one singing Garnet's parts is def LMK!Sandy (with the other Sha Wujings backing him up), with the chorus from the different Wukongs.

LMK: Gets really quiet. Like suspisciously so. The others go to shake him, only for a bottled storm of emotions and butterflies to pour from his body like a waterfall. Each one a moment where he lost his temper, a good friend, lost Macaque... He's lived a long life full of regrets. Soon only a recent memory of Macaque, smiling warmly at him, calms the storm.

HeroIsBack: Ignores the thoughts fluttering around him... until they start to swarm. He frantically tries to pluck them away, almost ripping into the swarm. A memory of Liuer appears; the moment where the sage yelled at the kid, and when Liuer cried and ran away. SWK weakly reaches to try and retrieve the vision, only for it to pass between his fingers. He only rises once more when he shows his tears, another memory of Liuer walking up to embrace him.

Reborn: Smashes the single thought-butterfly that manifests, only for it to bleed upwards into a fountain of many more. He's drowning in them. He reaches out a hand and grasps. The hand that pulls him from the storm turns out to be a memory of his fellow pilgrims. A tiny thought-butterfly lands in his palm, a familar tilt of the head making Reborn smile sadly. He brings it to touch his forehead.

Netflix: Looks around confused in his minescape. There's nothing there. No one is there. Except for a butterfly/thought that refuses to let him examine it, always flying out of reach. He jumps and yells for it, but gets no where. As the song progresses, Netflix finally pauses and breathes deepily. Holding out his hand, the thought finally landing and showing the memory of his last meeting with Lin. He smiles and lets the thought linger before it flies away.

NewGods: Flicks a thought-butterfly away like a cigarette. It returns, but does't grow any larger. He sighs and lets it sit on his shoulder peacefully. He turns and his back is covered in tiny thoughts just chilling. He shrugs and the smaller ones dissolve. He's ok to let them rest.

2000sCartoon: He laughes. His thoughts are a single flurry of butterflies that fly past him like migrating monarchs. He waves them goodbye and goes to tend to the SWKs not doing so well. A memory lingers on his head like a halo.

Meihouwang: Almost shot-for-short Ruby and Sapphire, just replaced with Shihou and a memory of Mihou. The smaller monkey gets so worked up by one large thought that he nearly forgets that his Mihou has greater issues. He collides with the memory of Mihou at the end, hugging it tightly.

Smash!: "Oh no! Don't you go pulling a Steven Universe on me! I'm leaving!" *gets swarmed by thought-butterflies* "Darn it." Is very self-aware of the situation being played out. Keeps ignoring his thoughts, even as they begin to multiply and pelt him like stones. He soon snaps and screams at them, only to turn and see a memory of him snapping at his friends in anger. He goes quiet. A memory of Goldie appears and lays her head on his shoulders comfortingly.

As for the song itself, I feel like most of the SWKs be like "Cute song." but not think much of it. Except Meihouwang!Shihou who starts singing it to himself and Mihou. Shihou gets worried when the white-furred monkey starts weeping, telling him it's a beautiful message. Netflix!SWK seems quiet, but closer inspection would reveal cathartic tears.

[disappearinginq]

5, 13, and 50 for AO3 Wrapped Ask?

I PROMISE I MEANT TO DO THIS LIKE A WEEK AGO I"M SORRY

5. Your most read fandom this year?

This is a wild, wild game - you don't understand. I have 99 tabs open to AO3 on my phone, and that is not an exaggeration. And those fandoms range from Magnificant Seven (TV series), Slow Horses, Ted Lasso, Lord of the Rings, Star Trek (AOS), Outer Banks....possibly Slow Horses might win by the amount of DIFFERENT works because most of them are one shots and I think I read one author's entire whumptober series in an afternoon....

13. Personal favorite fanfic that I read this year

Ok, this is just going to have to be a multiway tie - A Series of Narrow Escapes (Slow Horses) by @altschmerzes; Bridges (Slow Horses) by juicewiththebits; Not the Plan (Outer Banks - bless her for fixing redoing canon) by @fayedartmouth; and Houndsight (Hudson & Rex) by @itsjustdg; Repeat a Decision by Teeelsie

50. Favorite comment I left or received this year

Ooof. Having not updated diddly squat in months - perhaps all this year? I refuse to check now...I don't have that many to choose from, so pretty much any of them. I DID start making an effort to review the ones I liked though, so there's that. But probably the one I like the most is this one from Crash:

"Love this fic so much!! It's one of my most common re-reads for sure, just the right balance of hurt/comfort, badass-ery, angst, friendship etc. Length is perfect for "finish before bed but don't fall asleep halfway through" for me lol. I love all the characterisation so much, especially the dynamics between the characters. Your pacing is perfect, with the perfect mix of internal thought, action, and dialogue, and everything is so naturally and vividly described too, in a way that makes sense for the characters? Like you describe what katsumoto would have noticed and how he would have thought about it to himself. Thank you for writing and sharing it with us!!! Please take this comment as about 30 kudos by now, with at least 30 re-reads on the way xx" - mostly because of the last sentence, that just like made my whole month when I got it. I love return readers! <3 And honestly, that's more of how I wind up leaving reviews because I have to actually set reminders for myself to do it. Also, because Crash is one of my favorites too - I think I wrote it when I was supposed to be doing homework in like an afternoon?

Aaaaaaaaaaaaanyway...sorry for the delay, and thank you for the asks!

[cyborg-franky]

For @bulle-blackhole thank you for your support <3 I hope you enjoy!

Penguin x GN Reader x Shachi SFW Modern AU WC: 1,024

You’d been low energy for weeks now, not wanting to go out or do anything, just wanting to be wrapped up in the comfort of your own home. Wanting nothing more just to exist away from the world and the anxieties that came with it.

But you missed your boyfriends, missed getting to spend time with them. Thankfully they understood why you didn’t want to venture out into the world. That was why Penguin had suggested a date night, a stay-at-home date night. You’d been elated at the idea and had been excited about it the last few days.

Cleaning as best as you could manage, making sure fresh sheets graced your bed, knowing within hours they’d be ripped off and turned into a fort. You were curled up on your couch when the door rang, you lept up, your phone almost falling out of your grasp from the excitement and sudden movement.

You opened the door to see Penguin and Shachi, both grinning ear to ear, backpacks on and huge bags of shopping in their arms. You opened the door and let them in, smiling when each dipped down and kissed your forehead.

“Heeey!” Shachi said, “Hello, how are you today?” Penguin asked as he and Shachi headed for the kitchen. Opening up the fridge and freezer to put various things away. Soda, juice, fruit, ice cream. A little of everything.

“I’m better for seeing you both,” You replied and saw Shachi almost drop the bottle of soda, a light pink blush across his cheeks. Penguin rolled his eyes as he helped Shachi finish unpacking everything.

“So what did you wanna do today?” You asked as Shachi walked past you, pulling you into a hug, Penguin not far behind to cuddle you also. A big group hug that you melted into, feeling safe and loved. “Well, your the one that hasn’t been feeling good right?” Penguin replied and you thought about what you wanted to do.

“Does video games sound okay?”

–

Taking over the couch, curtains were drawn so the room was in darkness save for the lamps dotted around the room and the large screen you were all playing video games on. Shachi was sat on the floor cross-legged, controller clutched in his hands as he turned with it, thinking it would help the cart on the screen go in that direction, but it didn’t. And he fell off the road once more much to Penguins' delight as he let out a ‘HA’

You didn’t have much of a competitive streak, just enjoyed playing the assortment of silly party games with them both. Penguin and Shachi always had beef when against one another in a game. You were happy to watch them play beat 'em ups together as they shot fighting words back and forth.

All in jest. They were just both the sort of people who needed to win all the time. You leaned forward and ran your hand through messy ginger locks, feeling how soft Shachi’s hair was, he leaned back intot he touches with a sigh as Penguin loaded up another party game.

“Having fun?” Penguin asked, a hand on your knee, giving you a comforting squeeze. You nodded.

They made you so happy, you loved them and how they understood what you needed and you needed this, needed them.

A few hours passed, and Penguin had cooked a meal for the three of you, you and your boyfriends all sat around the table with full bellies, sighing. “Movie night?” Shachi asked as he looked over at you both. “What movie?” You asked, hoping Shachi wasn’t going to suggest one of his awful gorefests.

“We can take it in turns to pick?” He shrugged his shoulders and Penguin hummed in thought. “Yeah sounds nice, we can move to the bedroom? Take some snacks and soda up, get comfy on the bed…”

“Yeah I like that idea,” You said and let Shachi pull you up from the couch. 

Armed with snacks you all climbed the stairs to your room. Shachi set down things on the bed before he flopped down on the soft sheets and let out a sigh before Penguin let himself fall back, purposely hitting Shachi who let out an ooof. Both wriggled and made a space for you in the middle which you took. Feeling arms around you, the three of you cuddled on the bed.

Some time passed before you opened your eyes and stared at the ceiling, feeling Shachi to the right nuzzling his nose into your hair and Penguin on the left holding your hand in his. “Alright then, whose movie first?” You asked turning to face each in turn.

“You, you can pick! I’m comfy.” Shachi mumbled and cuddled your arm as you tried to move it to grab the remote, You couldn’t get your hand free of Penguins either. You guessed you could wait a little longer..

Eventually, they allowed you to move, getting the remote and picking your movie. You propped the pillows against the headboard, making a comfy place to lean. Shachi opened a big bag of salty popcorn and threw a bag of caramel popcorn to Penguin. You sat with your own popcorn and pressed play.

The three of you watched each movie, making comments here and there, completely cuddled up and comfy. The snacks got eaten, popcorn, candy, and even some fruit had been snuck into the snack rotation as you went from movie to movie.

Shachi had put on another, neither you nor Penguin had the energy to make a choice once the third movie had finished. It was just background noise anyway as you all got cuddled up on the bed, now in your PJs. All animal themed you noticed.

“What do you guys wanna do tomorrow?” You asked as you felt sleep pulling at you. “Well, the zoo has baby penguins, I thought we could go check that out… and it’s a weekday, shouldn’t be too loud…” Shachi said before yawning.

“Only if you feel up to it though.”

“Sounds good.” You replied although your voice was mumbly as you fell asleep cuddled between them.

[rob-in-suburbia]

1123

Ooof, I always love seeing you. So hard in all of them, spoiling me with so many. Love the body shot 🥵...and the last one the vein is really popping you're so hard.

[dribs-and-drabbles]

Laws of Attraction ep 3

I might redefine my colour theory as I go...and just from the first minute I'm wondering if the red is actually Charn's connection to his mother and therefore revenge (rather than the law)...(also, something something the blue flowers covering the red of his mother's shirt).

And flashback to happier times (hence the yellow shirt, I guess) with Charn's mother in pink again and wearing the ring on her necklace.

So Charn fought government officials (above the Mayor) to help the people keep their land but the powerful didn’t take kindly to his actions so killed his mother as a backlash?... I don't think we've got the full story here but this could be why Charn doesn't care much for the rich and powerful (despite him saying he likes money and power - but that's probably only because he needs both to get revenge).

"Unnamed body" is that the bodyguard that Charn and Tin fought last ep?

(Sorry, I just need a moment to get over how beautiful Ploy's mother is... 😮)

There's so much red and green...this has to mean something. Maybe the green is for Tonkhao and the red is Charn and Tin's revenge...but that means I'm less certain about Charn and Tin themselves (unless they're lapis lads - both loyal blue boys - hmmmm 🤔).

We've found the toy! And it looks like it's going to disappear with Ploy!

Rose telling Charn he cares about Tin and his world whilst flanked by so. much. red and green (on the wall and the cushions). (also Organ is amazing. It's so good seeing her play a different character to Tanya).

Please! I adore all these *pikachu face* don't call me uncle! I'm phi to you conversations we get in qls. 😂

The toy dog recorded an incriminating conversation maybe?

Charn's face when he realises Tin is comparing him to the kids! And then Tin calling Charn luung! Love it!

And the blue is finally back! On both of them! (*chanting* lapis lads lapis lads lapis lads *fingers crossed for @respectthepetty*) and Charn tells Tin to take his blue denim jacket off to pretend to be something he's not to garner support from the public. Delicious if this is correct!

The red line of revenge joining them at their shoulders in the background.

Evil babygirl activated! I love Charn's face here.

"I don't know who taught him that" - comedian of the year award goes to Thatthep.

Oooo the green (of Tonkhao and what she represents to them) looming behind both Thatthep and Tanthai.

The 'anger management room' is fantastic. So, so deliberate to first smash the green vase whilst wearing a red jumpsuit (since everything else he smashed were big appliances) and then the tv afterwards (symbolic of the truth eventually being revealed to the public?).

I mean...I feel for Tanthai but he brought it all on himself (under the huge influence of his father but still...). I really want to know what that toy will reveal.

I wonder if Thee will be on Tanthai's side or do as Thatthep says...

I love how it goes from all serious 'we're being threatened' dramatic music to romantic music and 'you can talk to me about your troubles if you want'.

Ooof. That is not a healthy father-son relationship. I know they want us to feel sympathy for Tanthai, and even see a romantic connection between Thee and Tanthai, but I just can't until I know what Tanthai did.

I think Tin suspects Charn of starting the fire himself. Aaaaand yes he does.

SILVY! (in loyal blue. Loyal to Charn?)

So I'm leaning more towards Tin (and maybe Charn as well) being blue... Charn walks Tin backwards away from the blue window whilst telling him he can't be his righteous self, he has to go against his true nature to get ahead of their enemies.

It's interesting though that Thatthep and Tanthai also wear a lot of blue. More to ponder on for later eps...

Oh and the clenched-fist-shot-my-beloathed. I haven't seen it for a while. And I'd rather not ever again.

[cailynwrites]

Harry Potter Rec Fest Day 2 - A comfort fic

This @hprecfest prompt was difficult for me because HP fanfic is all comfort fics for me. No matter how angsty, how dead dove, it's all comfort food. So I interpreted this prompt as fics that I go back to again and again.

EVERYTHING by GallaPlacidia Pairing: Draco x Harry

GallaPlacidia has such a way of writing, particularly for Draco's voice. She also has an economy of prose that makes just about every line elicit either a laugh or an emotional "ooof". She took down all her work when she published a beautiful book last year, but it's still available if you search around (I know there's a reddit post dedicated to it). I recommend starting with either "Dad Says" or "The Bucket List" but don't stop until you've devoured them all.

BONUS: She also recorded many of them for a podcast. Her versions have also been taken down, but she has said she has no objection to them being shared around and they're easy to find with a little googling. She's so good at narrating them that I was seriously bummed that she didn't record her novel as well. I definitely think her recordings heavily influenced my Draco voice.

Remain Nameless written by @heyjude19-writing and podficced by @beatificbean and @etl-echo-audiobooks Pairing: Draco x Hermione Word count: 312,286 Length: over 24 hours Rating: E

Two HeyJude recs in two days. Sorry not sorry! I don't know if Jude considers this a magnum opus, but it's massive and has incredible character study and development and really languishes in the enemies to lovers pipeline (in a good way!). It's angsty but not too angsty, which is why it qualifies as comfort for me. It's also translated into about 6 different languages, so if you're learning Italian on Duolingo, challenge yourself with a novel length Dramione.

The audiobook version narrated by @beatificbean is *chef's kiss*. It's also available to listen to on Spotify! It was my intro to the ETL-Echo universe and she is so good at Hermione and especially at reading really hot smut. If you've got a long road trip coming up, this is the perfect accompaniment. She has also recorded some outtakes and one-shots in the same universe: "Ceremonials" (AO3, Spotify).

************************************************************************

And finally, my two little self-recs ...

wasps and honey by @swoontodeath - a Podfic Pairing: Narcissa x Hermione Word count: 10,305 Length: 1:12:12 Rating: M

This was the first Cissmione I ever read. I recorded it for @hp-bodiceripper but it's got a great cottagecore vibe too. @swoontodeath's Narcissa is so lovely and complex and her internal monologue as she gets to know Hermione is wonderful. Also available on Spotify on the @etl-echo-audiobooks one-shot feed.

Sesame Seeds and the Entire Spectrum of Human Emotion by @ronbinary- a Podfic Pairing: Draco x Harry Word count: 9528 Length: 1:03:07 Rating: M

This was also recorded for a fest. @lcdrarry is so much fun; it's really fascinating to see the way the authors fit HP characters into other movie plots. @ronbinary wrote an adorable take on "The Proposal" for @lcdrarry 2021 and I recorded it for the 2023 fest. This perfect little romcom features fake dating, sharing a bed, adorable Molly Weasley meddling, and a lot of time on a boat. Also available on Spotify on the @etl-echo-audiobooks one-shot feed.