#the last bit was the part that made me tear up tbh
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i have been following you for a couple of years now, mostly silently. you are so beautiful, inside and out! the few times i have seen your face uncensored have made me swooon! the even fewer times i have heard you sing, my heart overfilled with such joy!
your honesty about your struggles and how you keep going are simply inspiring. thank you for sharing.
i am manifesting love and joy for you! š
#donāt mind me just sobbing over here š#I donāt even know what to say#thank you so so much for all the kind words and taking the time to send me this#it definitely made my week š©·#this filled me with such warmth and joy and love#thank you š#Iām starting to get back into singing and was thinking about posting covers on TikTok before this whole ban bullshit š¤¦š½āāļøš¤¦š½āāļø#I think it would be fun to learn new songs and share my version with everyone#the last bit was the part that made me tear up tbh#Iāve stopped being super duper honest about everything ever since I got that shit ask awhile ago#I know I blocked them and it doesnāt matter but then it just made me think thereās probably more who thought the same way#but I do miss going off in the tags and just letting it all out lol#thank you so so so much for this ask#you have no clue how much this means to me and how needed it was#thank you thank you thank you#Iām manifesting peace love and happiness your way my sweet anon š©·#ask#anon#fav asks#Iām gonna keep this ask with those compliments I was talking about earlier š«¶š„°
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ā© ā« GIVING STRAYKIDS HEAD WHILE HEāS LIVE
including. ot8 | pairing. skz x fem! reader | genre. smut - MINORS DNI | warnings. blowjob/handjob (m. rec), mentions of begging, mentions of a breeding kink, voyeurism, nicknames, mentions of using toys, humiliation, cum-eating, facial (f. rec), hair pulling, dubcon, felix cums inside, degradation, overstimulation, gagging, deep-throating, d/s dynamics
authors note. ty for requesting! i hope you donāt mind how wild i got with this.. seungminās made me feral (please tell me if i missed anything in the warnings!!)
CHAN :
would be so smiley n cute :((
until you kneel down and the realization hits
you can see his expressive eyes go āoh? oh.ā in five second flat
the way youāre looking up at him? heās twitching in his pants, trying his hardest to pay attention to chanās room
definitely says something like: āalright! letās get onto the next song, yeah?ā while furiously turning up the volume to drown out his soft huffs of breath, plump lips parted to exhale deeply
the way he utterly shudders when you lick from his shaft all the way up to his leaking head has the dreamiest sigh falling from your mouth
the way youāre testing his patience makes him want to fuck you silly šš
plays it off as if he was adjusting in his chair, meek smile giving away none of your naughtiness
once you start taking him into your mouth though, he reaches a hand to your hair, forcing you to down him
squeezes his eyes shut from the feeling of your throat swallowing him alongside the toe-curling whine you whimpered in response
most likely pretended to yawn to conceal his fucked-out face and the obscene sound of you gagging on him, babydoll eyes welling with tears
omg the way he looks down at you after that ?admiring your smudged mascara and the drool coating your lips and chin ?? pls eat me sir
āunfortunately, thatāll be the last song for this live, thank you Stay for joining me today..ā he says, nonchalantly thumbing at your bottom lip to wipe the residue sitting there
legs spread and cock flushed against his abdomen, you come to realize rather quickly that you got yourself into something dangerousā¦
MINHO :
heād prob be doing a live in the meeting room when you arrive, gazing at you pushing chairs out of the way to make him think youāre planning to sit down
till you settle between his legs and the realization dawns
has the most attractive, challenging stare ever watching you go to town
tbh minho is fucking terrifying with his self control in and outside of the bedroom
like heād be able to answer questions and act completely normal despite his dick being halfway down your throat
pretends to laugh at a comment when instead he reached a hand under and toyed with your clit, gathering your wetness on two fingers to smear on the side of your lips
what he was laughing at? how pathetic you sounded mewling and dripping with need as if you werenāt the one who decided to give him head rn
would def end the live a tad bit early, finally succumbing to the handjob you provided where he came all over your face with the sluttiest moan
10/10 would bend you over and fuck you on the table after
10/10 would keep your legs out of business for a good five to six days (i stand by my claim)
CHANGBIN :
binnie is so fucking transparent idek if he could hide it
but like, he makes weird noises anyways so tbh stay probably wouldnāt bat an eye
sooo needy
gently grabs your chin while you kitty lick his mushroom tip and gives you most pleading stare
if he couldāve telepathically communicated, he would definitely been begging
funny considering how he basically bred you into the mattress the night before , right?
you resort to kissing his swollen cock, ensuring heās watching when you collect his beading precum on a finger, bringing it up to your lips
to say he held back a moan doesnāt even cut it, poor baby mightāve bit his tongue off atp from your adorable eye contact and the mere image alone
gets frantic enough he blasts gods menu full volume and āsuddenlyā gets a text from Hyunjin saying he āneeds to goā
a.k.a needs to blow
dude absolutely explodes
his moans are the cutest by far >>>
cums all over your face muttering soft āplease please pleaseā over and over while his fat cock basically ropes messy strings
he swore heās never came harder in his life
andddd thatās how you got introduced to edging changbin!!!
jk, it just fueled your obsession with it further ;)
HYUNJIN :
prob the cutest of them all when you give him head under the table
he just feels so good and loved from your attention and the pleasure
has the dreamiest of smiles the entire time despite the music being obnoxiously loud to hide the sound
stays love this live bc of how cute he looked the entire time
lots conspired that he was drunk or smthn bc of how smiley he was, cheeks dusted pink
pretended to drop something so he could groan under the table, thigh twitching and abs tightening as he approached his orgasm
definitely grabs your head before he came, brows slightly knit and lips parted as he met your eyes
so fucking sweet after he cums, petting your head and running a light hand on your cheek where his cum smears
pops his thumb in your mouth, softly wiping your bottom lip of his essence
heās literally delighted i cannot make this up
totally nonchalant apart from groaning under the table which he hid from view
expect either the softest or hardest sex afterwards
like youāre going to either be carried because your legs are out of commission or because heās feeling romantic :((
HAN :
.. stay are prob getting an equally good treat too
and no they donāt know what was going on, they just know how from a certain timestamp in his most recent live his voice got a whole lot more attractive
expect a sudden raspy pitch, clicking his tongue casually as if his partner wasnāt spoiling him
on any other day heād be stupidly whiny, crying from the pleasure you provided
today, however, he just let himself dissolve in the ecstasy, breathing in the fresh air on cloud 9
there were some speculations from stay watching, but it only got as far as that
scary enough, he doesnāt make a sound, casually carrying out conversation and answering questions like nothing
that is until you get impatient, pressing hot kisses all over and speeding up the movement of your hand as you fist him, pretty eyes fixating on his face
aha. you see him slightly wince, bidding farewell quickly with a few over-exaggerated poses and blown kisses
stifles a groan as he approached his high, tracing the corner of your lips as he grumbles an excessively attractive:
ānow stick your tongue out, ļæ½ļæ½ļæ½donāt what you missing a drop.ā
then proceeds to cum all over your lips n mouth, thumbing away some of his residue there
āyouāre so messy, bunny, āhave to teach you some manners, hm?ā
FELIX :
he gets so cocky
and itās one of the hottest things on the planet
watches you through half-lidded eyes as you unbutton his jeans, taking him into your mouth
i feel like no matter how hard you try to rile him up, it just makes him cockier and gives him a visible ego boost
like, not a āthinking with my dick onlyā type of ego boost, more of a āwhy tf arenāt you reacting rn, please fuck me already at this pointā sort of ego boost
this man most likely turn off the music just to play it risky, forcing you down on his dick when you get too loud
reads comments as you literally deep throat him, eyes tearing up with how he keeps bumping the back of your throat
itās insane
lifts a brow daringly as he reads a particular comment and you swear you wouldāve moaned so fucking loud if it werenāt for him cruelly shoving fingers into your mouth as you fisted him with a hand
breathily sighs as you work faster, blinking a bit slower and hesitating with his answersāa telltale sign heās close
definitely ends the live earlier, quickly taking off your bottoms to pull you onto his lap and paint your cunt white
voices the most guttural groan, adams apple bobbing as he fills you so full of him
heās convinced there is absolutely nothing he loves more than stuffing your pussy, nothing
SEUNGMIN :
i will sit in the grave believing seungmin is one of the most god-teir men alive when it comes to head
another rbf (resting bitch face) king btw!!
meanest but also nicest ?? i canāt explain take this how you want
prob sings a song while you suck him off i cannotšš
youād most likely be more affected than he is (or you just canāt tell), bc youāll be a moaning mess from how nonchalantly heās already shoved two fingers inside your cunt, guiding your head into a steady rhythm with a spare hand
smiles every time you mewl on his cock, hungrily watching your hips stutter while his fingers curl and rub your pussy sooo good
lmao i bet he hits a high note when you cream(and when he cums too), drowning out the desperate cries you sob from his lap
ends the live without even a trace of what happened, pulling your hair roughly so you meet his eyes, tears freely rolling down your cheeks
āyou wanted this so donāt act like you didnāt. open.ā he instructs, and you obediently open your mouth for him, showing him your tongue and lips painted with his cum
āswallow.ā
his face when you swallow oml he loves seeing his baby behave
mumbles quiet āgood girlāās when you take his fingers coated in your juices into your mouth
honestly.. i could see him buzzing your puffy clit w a bullet vibrator afterwards while you sit on his dick, cooing as you fall apart on top of him, telling you itās a ārewardā while youāre overstimulated and sensitive beyond belief
JEONGIN :
kind of like hyunjin with his unpredictability, heās either stone cold or an innocent baby
today, however, he was definitely needy, looking adorably confused when you sauntered through the doorway
gasps when you slip under the desk, eyes turning into round saucers as you carefully rid him of his pants then boxers
has to pause on multiple occasions to pull himself together, occasionally turning his head away from the camera to express the overwhelming feeling of your tongue
leaks a quiet, oh so quiet whine in the midst of laughing at a comment
poor bub gets an army of comments asking if heās feeling sick from how flushed he is
cutie canāt admit how amazing you make him feel š¤
ends the live abruptly, literally only thinking about cumming in your mouth
desperate AF when he starts mumbling, pulling you off of him to stick out your tongue as he frantically fists his dick, beads of pre-cum decorating the swollen tip
āoh god oh god oh godā cumming, āgonna cum, in your mouth? baby please please wanna cum in your mouthā yeah just like that, good girl- fuck-ā is just an example of his barely intelligible moaning
trust that he came hard, strings of apologies falling off his pink lips at the mess he made of your face
oml if you keep sucking him off afterwards?? overstimulated innie is the cutest thing ever
expect lots of begging and neediness š
blurboki, july 2023 Ā©
#straykids x reader#stray kids smut#straykids smut#stray kids x reader#stray kids x y/n#skz smut#skz x reader#skz x you#stray kids x you#straykids x you#bangchan smut#bang chan smut#chris bahng#bangchan x reader#bangchan x y/n#bangchan x you#changbin x you#changbin x reader#changbin smut#lee know smut#lee know x reader#lee know x y/n#lee know x you#seo changbin x reader#hyunjin smut#hyunjin x reader#hwang hyunjin smut#hwang hyunjin x reader#han jisung smut#han jisung x reader
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omg ur taking requests!
can you do some angst to fluff with Atsumu, Iwaizumi, Suna, Kuroo, Ushijima, and Sakusa (Iām sorry if theyāre too many you can choose whoever you want to write about from these characters, I luv all of them soooo much)
Can you make it like really really Angsty in the start. Like the characters doing something theyāll regret a lot and then they spend a lot of efforts making up for it? Please make it fluffy in the end, I canāt handle sad endings š
Also please donāt include anything with infidelity or mentions of it. My boyfriend of 3 years cheated on me last month and Iām having such a hard time.
Thank you for considering my request. And thereās no pressure to accept, I donāt mind at all.
Hi! yes I am taking requests right now. š First of all, I'm so sorry that you had such a negative experience. But tbh, you're better off this way. Nobody needs such an ass cheating on them! šš¤ My ex did that too, with my ex-best friend btw. I also had a hard time but quickly felt better because I realised that it's a waste of time to cry over such a dick. I hope you don't lose hope in a healthy relationship based on trust. There really are good people out there and I hope you find someone who can appreciate you. Sending you a lot of hugs and kisses. š¤šā¤ļøāš©¹
And for your request. I've written three stories for Tsumu, Iwa and Suna. Unfortunately they got a bit tooo long for my taste, so I only made these 3. I hope that's okay. I really had problems making it super angsty (urg, I need more practice for angsty stuff šµāš«). As you wished, I didn't include anything with cheating (even though I had a few ideas haha.) and I also added a trigger warning before each story. I think Iwa's and Suna's in particular might be a bit darker... so you can decide on your own if you want to continue reading it or not. Anyway, I hope you still like it, and thanks for your request. Stay healthy! š„°š
Regretting their actions
Pairing: Atsumu x, Iwaizumi x, Suna x reader
Warning: angst to fluff, break-up (Atsumu, Suna), mention of abuse/anger issues, mention of blood (Iwaizumi), mention of abortion, mention of drugs/pills (Suna)
Part 1 | Part 2 (End)
tw: mention of break-up
You met Atsumu when he came to his brotherās onigiri store for the housewarming.
The two of you got along well quickly. And it wasnāt long before he kissed you at a party, looked at you with his cheeky grin and said, āTastes better than a victory.ā
More things happened that night. Not just simple kisses and when you woke up next to him in bed, he asked you, still sleepy: āYouāre my girlfriend now, arenāt you?ā
Youāve been together for several years now and were thinking about moving in together soon when Atsumuās career suddenly took off. He was traveling abroad more often and had less time for you or looking for an apartment.
And then it happenedā¦
You scroll through the apartment search app for something suitable for the two of you, lying on the bed while missing him terribly. You close the app to go to your messenger, only to realize that you were the one who last texted Atsumu... two days agoā¦ Two blue check marks indicate that he has read your messages but has not replied. Your fingers hover over the keypad of your phone and you think about writing to him. Maybe he read your message during training and didnāt have time to reply. Maybe he just forgot about it afterwards... maybe...
āHey Tsumu... I know youāre busy but, I hope youāre doing well. Love you.ā you type into your phone and send the message with a strange feeling in your stomach. It doesnāt take long before you see under his name that he is online. The gray check marks next to your message turn blue, but instead of replying, you see that he went offline again. You swallow a big lump down your throat, your heart feels heavy. Maybe he canāt answer you right now... you try to convince yourself again.
Several hours pass as you sink your head into your pillow and try to stifle your tears. Atsumuās sports t-shirt is in your arms, which he had given you before his trip abroad. Time passes and suddenly you hear the ringtone of your phone as a message arrives. Your heart hits loud against your chest as you reach for your phone and see your boyfriendās name. But your joy quickly disappears, the lump in your throat gets bigger and you canāt breathe.Ā
>> Hey... listen, I think itās better if we end the relationshipā¦ break up. I donāt know, but I just donāt have time for it. Iāll see you around. <<
It feels like a slap in the face. As if this is a poor joke. You want to write to him, ask him what this is all about, but your tears blur your vision. The only thing you send is a āreally?ā but the message is no longer read. It remains on one gray check mark.
Two days go by and you still think it was all a bad joke, but every time you read his message, you feel like throwing up. Has he really dumped the whole relationship? By a shitty text message? You open your Instagram account and enter his name almost as if on autopilot.
Another slap in the face as your tears run down your cheeks again. His bio no longer says āBest setter and proud boyfriendā but simply āSetter MSBY Black Jackalā. All the pictures he had with you on his account have been deleted. Instead, you can only see advertising photos or private photos of him. The last eight pictures are of him, Hinata and Bokuto dancing and having fun with fans in different bars. Atsumu grins at the camera as if he doesnāt care about you at all. As if your relationship meant nothing to him.
You text him some more times, leave him voicemails because he never answers your calls. But after a few days, you let it go. It only frustrates you even more to see how little this relationship actually meant to him. For days, you cry yourself to sleep, what doesnāt go unnoticed by Osamu. After all, he sees you three times a week when you help him out in his store. When you tell him what has happened, he is also speechless, because Atsumu has really pissed him off with all his raving about you. So why would he break-up with you out of the blue? Osamu canāt see you as devastated as a heap of misery. So he also tries to find out the reason for the break-up between you and his silly brother. But when he calls him, Atsumu only faces him coldly on the phone. āDid she tell you to ask me? Leave it okay? I think I just realized that I donāt want a relationship.ā
Two months go by and somehow you still canāt believe that your relationship just fell apart. Osamu tries to distract you somehow, but it doesnāt help because he reminds you too much of your idiot ex-boyfriend.
Nevertheless, you are grateful to Osamu for swapping your shift with his coworkerās shift so that you can open the store with him in the morning. That way, you avoid running into Atsumu, who is more likely to be in the restaurant in the evening as soon as he returns from his stay abroad. Youāre not ready to face him at the moment.
Just as youāre about to finish work, you remember that you wanted to show Osamu a video on your phone. āLook, the new trailer for the second season of this soccer series is out. Shall we watch the first episode together on Saturday after work?ā you ask Osamu as he approaches you and looks over your shoulder. He rests his hand on the counter next to you, his chest almost touching your back, but he keeps his distance from you respectfully. You are both focused on the trailer, not hearing the doorbell from the store.
Atsumu is tired. The flight was delayed, and he hasnāt been able to sleep properly for weeks. How could he sleep well with all the partying and Hinata as his roommate, who spent the night in the hotel calling his friends from Karasuno. At least thatās what he tells himselfā¦ that this is the reason for his sleepless nights. But this thought vanishes when he steps into his brotherās store hungry, actually only wanting to eat a few onigiris and then go home. Into his apartment. His empty, dreary apartment. But as he walks through the door of the store, it feels as if someone has hit his chest with full force, knocking the air out of him.
He sees Osamu leaning towards you with a sense of familiarity. Whatās going on there? And why does it bother him so much that you giggle and look at Osamu, who returns your gaze with a nod and a smile before turning to the door? His brother winces when he sees Atsumu. As you turn around as well, your smile disappears.
You look at Atsumu as if youāve just seen a corpse, before packing your bag and saying goodbye to Osamu with a āSee you tomorrow.ā, only to walk past Atsumu with quick steps. You donāt even give him a glance, knowing that if you locked eyes with him, your tears would run. You would want to ask him questions upon questions. Why did you break up with me? Why am I not enough for you? Why did you lie to me for so long? Why...
As you walk through the door, you accidentally bump into him. This nudge, which was actually rather gentle, felt so painful. Why does it bother Atsumu to see you standing so close to his brother? Why does it hurt him that you stared at him with those empty eyes, as if he were a stranger? No. Worse, as if he were someone who had hurt you. Why does he have the feeling that he couldnāt make a sound if he opened his mouth now? The answer is simple, and even Atsumu seems to understand it by now as he looks from the now closed door over to Osamu, who stares at him with an indifferent expression crossing his arms in front of his chest. āSo this is what someone who has realized that he doesnāt want a relationship looks like? Ya look like shit.ā
Oh, how Atsumu would love to punch Osamu in the face. āWhy are ya touchinā my girl?ā is bitter on his tongue, but he has no right to say it out loud. After all, he was the one who turned you down. The blonde Miya suddenly realizes how incredibly stupid his action was.
Back then, Atsumu had not expected to be traveling abroad so often. At first, it was only temporary stays. Nothing that would damage a relationship.
But the last few times in particular, he was sometimes away for several months. You kept telling him on the phone that everything was okay, but every time he called Osamu, he said that your eyes were sometimes red when you came to work and that you looked tired and sad.
Atsumu knew he was the reason. That youād probably be better off without him. After all, youāre a great woman, someone who would find a new partner quickly.
You didnāt deserve to be sad all the time when he was gone. You should be happy. After all, a smile suits you so much better than a sad expression.
Atsumu would concentrate on his career. It would be difficult for him at first, but he would manage without you. He had toā¦ for your sake.
So his mind was made up when he read your unanswered, concerned messages. If he texts you now to say that itās over, being an ass to you, youāll be able to forget him quicklyā¦ That was what he thought.Ā
But it wasnāt that easy. Your puzzled messages, your crying voice on his voicemail, broke his heart. Yet he tried to cover it all up with parties and his dear fans. He convinced himself that he was fine. Only to arrive home, see you and realize what an idiot he was, how much he missed you.
And now itās Atsumu who reaches for his phone and texts you message after message.
Atsumu 8:02 PM: Hey babe, no.. hey Y/n. I know I have no right to text you. But pleaseā¦ letās talk. I fucked up. Damn, I fucked up so hard that I donāt even know how to startā¦ shitā¦
Atsumu 8:12 PM: Pleaseā¦ please answer your phone, babeā¦
Atsumu 8:44 PM: I know Iāve fucked up. I know I hurt and disappointed you. Fuck, I know I was an ass. Yk, I thought I was doing the right thing.Ā
Atsumu 9:34 PM: Fuckā¦ please answer meā¦ I stillā¦ damnit.Ā
That was the last message you received from Atsumu before you put your phone away and tried to forget him. Why is he doing this to you? Why is he stirring up your feelings again?
But Atsumu doesnāt think about stopping now. He runs to your house, to the apartment building and rings your doorbell. Once, twice, he rings so often that you canāt ignore it. You are about to tell him to leave through the loudspeaker system, but he interrupts you.
āFuck baby, please open the door. Iāmā¦ I still love ya, okay? I always loved ya. I - shit, can ya even hear me? Fuckā¦ā he curses agitatedly and presses the bell next to your nameplate again several times.
But instead of letting him in, you go down to the entrance of the apartment building and open the door with an expression on your face that Atsumu has never seen before. What is it? Anger, sadness, despair? Everything somehow.
āSay... are you kidding me? Do you think thatās funny?ā you ask him, bewildered, still standing in the open doorway. Of course, you wouldnāt just believe him. Atsumu could have guessed. Your reaction was completely understandable. But he has to do something to show you that heās serious.
āNo, no, I donāt. Iām dead serious. Please let me explain,ā he says, and starts to tell you that he thought a break-up would be best for you because heās not good enough for you. Since you were obviously so sad about him leaving so often and he didnāt want to be the reason. He tells you that he thought he could get over you, but that he had to realize that you are the most important thing to him. Somethingā¦ someone he doesnāt want to lose. With shaky hands and a still agitated voice, Atsumu takes out his phone.
āI wanted ya to hate me so that it would be easier for ya. But believe me, I... I couldnāt forget ya. Look, youāre still my wallpaper. All the photos of the two of us are still on my phone, all the memories-ā he is about to unlock his screen when his phone falls out of his hand and drops to the floor. Atsumu seems to be completely overwhelmed right now, as if he doesnāt know what to do. Should he bend down, pick up the phone, should he keep talking to you or hug you? He doesnāt know.
āBaby, please, please, Iāll do anything. Please gimme a chance. Iāll talk to my agent about not takinā so many jobs abroad. I will be with ya more often. Always write to ya and call ya in the evening when Iām not at home. Letās look for an apartment so we can move in together. Please, please, I would do anything. Please believe me that I love ya. Please..." he begs in a voice that becomes more and more brittle with every word. His eyes are full of emotion and his hands, which have unconsciously reached for yours, are trembling terribly.
āTwo months... two months you ignored me, treated me like a piece of trash.ā You say in a low voice as you search for eye contact. Atsumu has never felt so scared. Only now does he realize that the love of his life is standing in front of him, and that this might be the last time heāll see her again, the last time heāll touch her skin. But then againā¦ Atsumu was an ass, so why should you forgive him? No, he canāt think like that. After all, you loved him. And if you love him as much as he loves you, then maybe thereās still hope.
āI know, and I know I can never make it up to ya. I know itās not done with an āIām sorryā. Iām the dumbest, most idiotic ex-boyfriend youāve ever had. But... Iām stubborn too. And if that means chasinā after ya for 10 years, drivinā to yer apartment every day to ring the doorbell and tell ya I still love ya, wishinā ya a good night every day, nice dreams and telling ya how important you are to me... Iāll do it. Every damn day, if it means thereās still a little hope for us.ā He answers you hoarsely, keeping eye contact, hoping that you see how honest his words are.
You sigh, bend down, and pick up his phone before handing it to him. Atsumu doesnāt know what to do with all this. His face grimaces as if heās expecting the worst. āThen... you shouldnāt lose your phone... if you want to write to me every day,ā you answer him, a weak smile on your lips. Atsumuās sorrowful expression suddenly changes and you see him looking at you with hope.
āDoes that mean ya...ā the blonde Miya can no longer contain his emotions as he leaps forward and pulls you into his arms. His embrace is so tight that you can barely breathe, as if heās afraid youāll slip out of his hands. Firm, but quivering. His whole body is shaking and youāre sure youāve just felt something wet on your skin. Tears? Is Atsumu crying? āI promise to be a pain in yer ass every day. To text ya, to call ya, to be there for ya. Even in yer sleep. Okay? I love ya... I love ya so much...ā
tw: abuse, anger issues, mention of blood
Youāve been with Iwaizumi since your school days. Back then, as a little flirt at school, Oikawa and Matsukawa mainly teased Iwaizumi for having a crush on you.
But in the end, many were jealous of the perfect couple who waltzed together on the dance floor at the prom with loving looks on their faces.
You were inseparable. Even Iwaizumiās stay in America for his university didnāt affect your relationship. So it was no wonder that you got married after his return and were the perfect happy couple.
At least for the first few years.
The stress of being a coach for the Japanese national team is weighing on Iwaizumiās mind. He normally handles stressful situations well, but he is under pressure.
If the team fails to perform in the next few games, he will lose many sponsors and possibly even his job.
Iwaizumi is constantly on edge and you feel like you have to walk on eggshells around him so you donāt provoke him.
More often, he has sudden temper tantrums, shouting at you about things that arenāt worth mentioning. āDamn it, I told you I need this one shirt for today. Why isnāt it clean?ā
And once, when you stumbled with your words and asked him whether it might not be better to take a break as a coach, he was so angry that he almost hit you. But he managed to hold back and just sighed before going out for a beer in a nearby bar.
You donāt want to admit it to yourself, but right now, youāre really scared of your own husband.
Today was another training match between the Japanese national team and the Indonesian team. The teamās performance was better, but nowhere near good enough to shine. You watched the game on TV and run through your imaginary list in your head already, of potential trigger points for Iwaizumi. You donāt want him to get upset. The laundry is done; the house is clean; the food is also ready and in the fridge. Did you take out the trash? You chew nervously on your lower lip as you walk to the kitchen and let out a relieved sigh. Thatās done too.
You are just closing the lid of the garbage can when you hear the key in the lock of your front door and Iwaizumi comes home with a surprisingly normal, āIām home, my love, smells good in hereā. Your shoulders relax immediately, a smile is back on your lips as you walk cheerfully into the hallway to greet Iwaizumi.
āHello darling! How was your day?ā Iwaizumi hugs you and leans down so you can kiss his cheek. āLet me eat something first. My day has been really exhausting,ā he sighs, watching you nod and turn around to warm up the food for him. Your husband hangs up his jacket, puts down his bag and is about to turn around to follow you when he stumbles against a nearby vase that you had placed as a decoration for the fall changeover. The vase swings, loses its balance and falls to the floor in pieces.
āShit!ā You hear Iwaizumi curse and immediately run to him, anxiously hoping that nothing has happened to him. But luckily, he is unharmed. āWait, Iāll clean up the broken pieces, you eat-ā youāre about to say, but Iwaizumi interrupts you loudly. āAlways this stupid bullshit you put up. Shit, I could have hurt myself. If I miss now, thatās it for my career!ā he shouts and stomps past you. You turn around hastily and apologize. āThat wasnāt my intention, really,ā you say, before realizing that it was a mistake to talk back. Iwaizumi turns around, his eyes ferocious and angry like a wild animal as he takes a step towards you. Your heart is beating restlessly and you are suddenly afraid.
āNot your intention? Admit it, youād be happy if I got rid of the job!ā he shouts, noticing how you start to tremble and shake your head. But Iwaizumi doesnāt seem to be in his right mind as he takes another step towards you. āGo clean up the mess! Make yourself useful!ā he says through gritted teeth as he looks at your anxious and puzzled face. You know you should move, but your body doesnāt seem to listen, too scared to move a finger. And then it happens.
Iwaizumi grabs you by the hair and pulls you towards him. You cry out, weeping bitterly as you hear his voice again. āAre you deaf?! Get going!ā he shouts, before pushing you away with more force than necessary. You lose your balance, stumble over your own feet as you fall and hit your head on the edge of the stairs in the hallway next to the broken vase. Your head hurts terribly, something warm flows down your face, sticking to your hair and making your vision suddenly completely different. It gets smaller and smaller before everything goes black in front of your eyes and the sounds around you stop completely.
Iwaizumi is abruptly perfectly sober and only now understands what has just happened. What he has just done to you, the woman he loves more than anything.
His eyes are big as he stares at his hands, which start to tremble in front of him.
Panic spreads through him as he looks at you. At your motionless body, at all the blood under your head.
He doesnāt know how he did it. His memories are hazy, but he can still remember trying to wake you up, in vain.
He had taken off his shirt, pressed it on your head injury to stop the bleeding and somehow managed to call an ambulance. Iwaizumi canāt remember anything else, just the one question from the paramedic who put you on the ambulance stretcher and took you to the hospital. Since Iwaizumi was your husband, he was allowed to drive with you.
āHow did this happen?ā the paramedic asked, as Iwaizumi answered quietly, āI donāt know... I really donāt know.ā
Itās now been some hours after the accident and your head had been stitched up. Thank God it wasnāt as bad as it looked at first.
Youāre still in the recovery room, Iwaizumi next to your bed on a chair, his hands folded in his lap as he hangs his head in bewilderment, looking at his wedding ring shining on his ring finger.
What happened? What has become of him? He still canāt believe what he has done.
He looks at his hands again, opens them, starts to tremble, clenches them into fists and realises how he lets out a frustrated sigh, which he had been holding back, as warm tears roll down his cheeks, soaking the fabric of his trousers.
In his mind, thereās only your shaking body, that frightened look, your screaming, and then this unbearable silence.
When you open your eyes, your head throbs a little and you have to squint through the bright, clinical light. āWhere... where am I?ā you say quietly, looking around the room and noticing that youāre lying in a hospital room. Next to your bed is none other than Iwaizumi. But he looks different. Brokenā¦ He shrinks at your words and looks up at you. You see his red eyes and how he hesitates whether itās okay to take your hand in his. Iwaizumi gets up from his chair, wants to close the distance to your bed but his legs collapse and he falls to his knees when he suddenly starts to... cry?Ā
āHaji- me...ā you say, still feeling exhausted. āIām... god I...ā Iwaizumi doesnāt know what to say, doesnāt know how to look you in the eye. He takes a deep breath, regains his courage before peering at you. Carefully, he grasps your hand, checking if you are afraid, but you donāt seem to pull it away. Maybe because youāre still too tired. Awkwardly, he strokes the back of your hand before resting his forehead on it and closing his eyes briefly.
āIām a terrible husband. Iāve done everything I shouldnāt have done. Instead of carrying you on my hands, bringing a smile to your face and protecting you from everything that would harm you, Iāve done the exact opposite. Instead of being happy to see me, youāre just scared of me, arenāt you?ā he says in a shaky voice and looks up at you again. You are calm. Just stare at him with a hurt look.
āI.... I can understand if you want a divorce. If you donāt want to be with a monster like me anymore. I really canāt even blame you. But... please let me tell you one thing. When I saw you lying on the floor like that, the world collapsed inside me. I was afraid of losing the most important thing in my life. And the most important thing is not my job, no, itās you. And Iām ashamed that Iāve forgotten that. I am disgusted with myself and I know that is no excuse. What I have done is unforgivable. But please... if there is still a bit of hope, then I will try to do everything I can to be the man you fell in love with again. I want to be your Haji-bear again. Your place of peace, and your favorite person. I will go to anger issues therapy, behavioral therapy. If itās better for our relationship, Iāll step down as a coach and see if I can find a job as a volleyball coach at a school. No matter what, I would do anything.ā Your hand becomes wet as his tears land on it. His words move something inside you. You want to believe him, you donāt want the relationship to end either, but everything that has happened so far will not pass by without damage.
āI need time, Hajime... If you really mean it, please grant me the time...ā you answer him and notice how your words seem to tear him apart. But at the same time he seems to want to make the best of the situation. He lets go of your hand and stands up just to sit back down on the chair next to your bed, looking at you determinedly, his eyes still red and swollen. āAs much time as you need. If it means we still have a chance...ā
A few months pass. Iwaizumi has passed on the house to you and moved into his parentsā house to give you the space you need. He goes to therapy three times a week and tells you about his progress. He is still coaching the national team, but his assistant coach is taking a lot of the work off his hands and the volleyball team seems to be playing better again.
Just like when you were at school, youāll find a letter in your letterbox once a week. Back then, Iwaizumi always told you a bit about his week and wrote it down because, funnily enough, he was too shy to talk to you in person. Only that in his current letters he writes that he misses you, but hopes that you are doing well at the moment.
He meets you in public places, goes out with you, so that you gradually feel more comfortable with him again, that you can see his progress in therapy and donāt just think itās empty words.
Six months have passed since the incident. You are standing in the bedroom, changing the sheets, when Iwaizumi comes through the front door of the house. āMy love, Iām home,ā you hear Iwaizumiās calm voice. Coming home from his therapy session, he hangs up his jacket in the hallway as your voice lets him know where you are.Ā
Iwaizumi puts the flowers he bought for you on the kitchen table before he sneaks into the bedroom and sees you trying to unfold the sheets to put them on the blankets. With silent steps, he reaches around your waist to throw you onto the bed with him, wrapped in the covers that were in your hands earlier. Screaming, you laugh in unison with his chuckle as you look into each otherās eyes. āHajime! Donāt scare me like that.ā you laugh softly, while his hand gently tucks your hair behind your ear. Iwaizumi looks at your forehead, at the small scar that is left from your injury, before leaning forward and giving you a kiss on that spot.
āIām sorry, but that was just so tempting,ā he says, closing his eyes as he pulls you closer and just relaxes in bed with you. He strokes your back and kisses your forehead once more. āHajime... whatās going on? Why are you so clingy suddenly?ā you laugh, but Iwaizumi doesnāt join in the laughter, instead answering you seriously.
āToday, six months ago, I almost lost you. Iām just grateful that nothing happened to you. Thankful that you gave me another chance, even though I showed my worst side.ā You canāt think of the right words to answer him, so you just smile, snuggle closer to him, and close your eyes. Safe in his arms, with his pulsating heart at your ear, you fall asleep.
tw: mention of abortion, mention of drugs/pills (without consent)Ā
Suna and you were just friends for a long time. Even if the others saw you more like a couple.
You were the only one Suna didnāt mind when you sat next to him and pulled out one of his earphones to listen to music with him.
You always had the same route to school and if one of you came to school alone, you knew immediately that the other one must be sick.Ā
With graduation, you mentioned that you might want to study abroad. That time, Suna had a weird feeling in his stomach for the first time. As if he was afraid of losing you.
That was the day he realised that he felt more for you than just friendship.
The same evening, he asked you to come over and watch a movie when he yawned in a very clichĆ©d way to put his arm over your shoulder and pull you closer to him. He didnāt know why he was so nervous, but he just was.
A number of things went through his mind. What if you donāt feel the same way about him as he does about you? Will you still want to study abroad? Would you end your friendship with him if you didnāt feel the same way?
He tried to block out the questions and then, with his usual calmness, asked you if you could imagine anything more than a friendship. Luckily for him, you said yes.
From that moment on, everything was perfect. You had created your own little world over several years. You studied, and luckily not abroad. Suna was successful in volleyball, so you were both able to buy an apartment together quickly.
Just the two of you. Your friends were there from time to time, but in the evenings you were always alone at home, arm in arm, in the quiet flat without any noise or other people to disturb you.
Until one morning where you look at the little piece of plastic in the bathroom, stunned, when the two red stripes tell you that you are pregnant.
You hadnāt spoken to Suna about having children yet, but youāve been together for so long now and everything is going well that you assume he would be just as happy as you are.
You thoughtā¦
When Suna comes home, youāve already prepared a little surprise. There are a pair of baby shoes on the table in the living room, the pregnancy test in front of them and a little balloon with āBest Dadā written on it. You canāt help smiling as you see Suna walk into the room when you call out āsurpriseā, looking a little shy in his direction. But Sunaās reaction differed from what you expected.
Almost disgusted, he looks in your direction. āThis better be one of those stupid TikTok pranks, right?ā he says, and your smile disappears abruptly. Your stomach turns and you feel sick. And not because of the pregnancy. You stand there irritated, only able to utter a quiet āNo... itās not a jokeā, confused by his negative reaction. āNo? What week are you in? Tell me you can still have an abortion...ā he says, annoyed, as he walks towards the table to see if there is any information about the week of pregnancy on the pregnancy test.Ā
āWhat?ā you say in bewilderment, still looking at Suna, who throws the test on the table in frustration before starting to massage his temples. āWeāll go to the gynecologist tomorrow, okay? Get rid of it. A child means responsibility. You have to look after this thing all the time, youāre no longer flexible and itās noisy too... I just donāt want that.āĀ
His words feel like a thousand stabs. Never have you seen Suna act like this before. You anticipated that he might be a bit taken by surprise and perhaps not be able to deal with the situation at first, but Suna seems to have a very clear opinion on the subject. He doesnāt even seem to be willing to talk. But abort a child? Let Sunaās and your baby die just like that? You canāt do that. You donāt want that.Ā
The two of argue. Sunaās look gets progressively angrier. Yours sadder until he decides to leave the house with a āDo what you want, maybe itāll die anywayā. Now youāre home alone with his painful words. You stand rooted to the spot in the room for several more minutes until the strength in your legs finally gives way and you slump to the floor, crying bitterly. The night, you spend alone in your bed, without Suna. He doesnāt answer his phone and doesnāt reply to your messages. You donāt hear from him the next day either, and he hasnāt come home. Thank God you get a message from Osamu, who texts you that Suna is with him and that you have nothing to worry about. But how are you supposed to stay at home without worrying if your boyfriend doesnāt get in touch with you and youāve been arguing for days? You are scared. Afraid for the baby, afraid for the relationship and everything you two have built up.
Another day passes. You lie in bed, tired and lacking in energy. Nevertheless, you pull yourself together and get up, go to the bathroom to get ready for the day and donāt notice when the front door opens and Suna walks in. āBaby doll, Iām at home... and... Iām sorry...ā you hear Sunaās voice and walk out of the bathroom. Even though you had a fight, you are still happy to see the man you love so much again. With a somewhat sad smile, he stands there, a bouquet of flowers in his hand as he approaches you.
āIām really sorry. I behaved like an ass. You took me by surprise with the news and somehow... I donāt know. What do you say you sit down now? Iāll make us a drink and we can talk about all this. About the baby, and what happens next?ā You can hardly believe his words. What has Osamu done in the last few days to make Suna suddenly do a full turnaround and be willing to talk to you openly, without shouting about becoming a parent? You make a mental note to thank Osamu later, before nodding with a smile and sitting down on the sofa in the living room.
But what you donāt know is that Suna went to a friend, a doctor, who gave him two pills before he came home. Pills for an induction of abortion. You have to take one now and the other two to three days later.
Suna knows that you wouldnāt take these pills voluntarily.
So he makes sure that you are indeed sitting in the living room before he takes out a small bag containing a pill, puts it in the grinder and turns it into a fine powder before mixing it into your iced tea.
He takes a deep breath, putting his smile back on as he walks towards you in the living room, where you are already waiting for him with happy eyes.
Without saying much, he hands you the glass, sits down next to you and watches you.
āI know itās all so sudden and I could have said it differently. I really took you completely by surprise with the news,ā you say quietly, looking at the iced tea in your hand, unaware that an abortion pill is floating there.
Suna listens attentively as you talk about how you first had to understand what a pregnancy means, but that your overwhelm quickly turned into joy because you are looking forward to holding a mini version of the two of you in your arms in less than 9 months. You talk about all the beautiful things that are going through your head, while Suna continues to listen to you, his eyes constantly focus on the tea in your hands and you.
He keeps looking at you as you raise the glass and press it to your lips, ready to drink the poison cocktail, when he realizes what he was doing. What heās trying to do here.
Panic strikes him. His green eyes widen as he literally knocks the cup out of your hand. It falls to the floor with a loud thud. āDonāt drink that!ā he says in an unsteady voice and looks at you in horror.
But you donāt understand anything, only shake your head.
āI donāt know whatās gotten into me. I... I think I just made the worst mistake of my life,ā Suna says, looking back from you to the broken cup. You donāt understand whatās going on and tilt your head, asking him if everything is all right. But when Suna continues talking and tells you what was in your tea, your world collapses. You are shocked that your own boyfriend wanted to do this to you. āI was overwhelmed. I... I know thatās no excuse. But when I heard you talking, I realized that -ā Suna wanted to continue, but your voice cut him off, your words silenced him.
āLetās break up,ā you say, and unlike before, unlike when you argued a week ago, your voice is determined now, your eyes full of pain and betrayal. Those green eyes that used to mesmerize you are now looking at you desperately. āWhat?ā Suna whispers softly, followed by a āNo, waitā. But you interrupt him again.
āYou just wanted to give me some drugs without my consent so Iād lose the baby?! No, Rintarouā¦ Iām breaking up with you. That... no, I canāt do that.ā Abruptly, you get up from the sofa, ignoring the hand that tries to grab you before quickly slipping into a jacket and a pair of shoes just to leave the apartment. Suna wants to run after you, but his legs wonāt move. His mind and heart are screaming to run after you, to stop you and tell you heās sorry, but his body just wonāt obey him. When he finally manages to get up, youāre already gone.
Still wearing his slippers and without putting on a jacket, he eventually runs out to check out all the places you love, all your friends, to see if he can find you somewhere. But no matter where he looks, he canāt find you. You donāt reply to messages or phone calls. The mechanical voice of your voice mail greets him directly. āShit, shit, shit!ā he yells as he stands in the park where you two had your first official date. The surrounding people look at him. Some with an irritated look, some as if they were pitying him.
Without really knowing where to go, your legs automatically led you to the bus that goes to Kitaās home.
Kita was one of your best friends back then. And you knew that if you went to Kita and told him not to tell Suna that you were there, he wouldnāt tell his friend either. And thatās exactly what Kita did.
You were in Kitaās guest room when you heard Sunaās voice in the hallway.
He sounded shattered, broken, as he begged Kita to tell him where you were.
This went on for several weeks, until one evening Suna rang the doorbell again, trying to talk to Kita in a voice you had never heard before.
His voice was so thin, so fragile, as if a heap of misery was speaking out of him.
Kita tells him once again that he doesnāt know where you are when you hesitantly open the door, thinking about going downstairs and listening to what Suna has to say. But for now, you just listen to the conversation.
āPlease, Shinsuke, I know you know her location. Please, just give her this. Please...ā Kita sighs, followed by a soft āok...ā before the front door closes. Your best friendās footsteps creak beneath the floor as he walks up the stairs, looks at you a little twisted and hands you a large package.
You know that you demand a lot from Kita. Itās not easy for him to lie to his friend either. Eventually you have to talk to Suna.
Alone in your guest room, you spend almost half an hour looking at the unopened package at the other end of the bed until you finally decide to open it. When you see whatās inside, surprise catches you. Multiple emotions flow through your body without you even noticing how your eyes suddenly turn glassy. Small letters and several items are in the box. You take out the letter that is on top of all the other items.
āMy love, I donāt even know where to start. I canāt apologize for what I did. Nevertheless, I want to tell you that Iām sorry. I was confused and scared. Our relationship has always been perfect so far and I thought it was great that it was just the two of us and that no one else disturbed our privacy. I was afraid that when we had a child, we would argue, have no more time for each other, and grow apart. I was selfish and didnāt think about how you would feel. I wasnāt thinking about our baby. The thought that we were both going to be parents hadnāt crossed my mind at all. But every time I walked past those little shoes you had placed in the living room, I couldnāt think of anything else but seeing our child standing in them. How it tries to move around in it, sometimes falls down because it loses its balance and seeks shelter with its beloved mom. I regret every second of what Iāve done, every word Iāve said. Hurting you was the last thing I wanted to do, and yet I did it. I am sorry. I am so terribly sorry.
I did some research. Did you know that it is currently very difficult to find midwives? You should probably start looking very early on. My team colleague gave me the number of the midwife he and his wife had at the birth of their two children. I also have three other numbers. You might want to give them a call. There are also birth preparation classes in our town. I have also put a brochure in the package for you. You donāt necessarily have to go there with your partner. With meā¦ So... if you want, you could also go there with Kita, even if I would be happy if we both did it together. But I can understand if you donāt want to.
Are you eating enough? You should pay particular attention to your diet during pregnancy. A lot of women suffer from a vitamin deficiency during pregnancy. But you have probably already discussed this with your gynecologist. Anyway, Iāve written down a few recipes for you that are rich in vitamins. I admit that Osamu helped me a little with this. Oh, and on the back are some things you shouldnāt eat during pregnancy. Raw eggs and products containing them such as ice cream, mayonnaise and so on... you should not eat them, because the risk of salmonella infection is high. Peanuts can contain aflatoxins, which can also harm the fetus... but as I said, Iāve put together a list for you. In case you didnāt already know all this already. There are a few other things in the box. Maybe youād like to take a look.
I hope you are doing well. I hope the baby is doing well too. Have you thought of a name yet? Do you know whether it will be a boy or a girl? Iām sure thereās already a little bump on your belly. I... would really like to be with you right now. Would love to hold you in my arms and stroke your tummy. I know I made a mistake that can never be fixed. But if youāre willing, if thatās what you want, Iād really like to be by your side again. And if not as your boyfriend, then as the father of our baby. I would like to do couplesā therapy with you so that we can find our way back to each otherā¦ So that you can trust me again. Because in all of this, I was the problem and never you. But only if you want it too, of course. I know it may be hard to believe, but I love you. So much that a life without you scares me. I am sorryā¦ā
Youāre crying bitterly by now as your tears blur the ink on the letter before you put it aside and look in the box. Next to a small onesie for babies, there is a note with the telephone numbers of midwives, a small book with recipes, the brochure he had mentioned and another box containing photos and memories. Pictures that Suna had always secretly taken of you at times when he thought you looked extra pretty. You always found the photos embarrassing, but for him they were beautiful to look at. Because they were moments when you were just being you, not smiling for the camera or doing anything else to disguise yourself.
There was also a necklace with shells on it in the box. You made it for Suna when you were on vacation in Croatia. It turned out incredibly ugly, yet Suna wore it proudly during the whole vacation. Youāre touched that he still has this ugly necklace. Little notes that you wrote to each other at school are also in there. So many more memories from the past. Where had Suna hidden this little box in your apartment so that you never noticed it?
You hastily get up, open the door and run down to the hallway as Kita comes out of the living room and looks at you questioningly. āIs everything all right? Do you need to see a doctor?ā He asks concerned, but you just shake your head, wanting nothing more than to see Suna, talk to him again. He asks you if you are absolutely sure, but your determined nod is enough for an answer. So he grabs his jacket and car keys, driving you straight to your ex boyfriend, to your apartment. He doesnāt want you to take the bus in your current state.
Suna is sitting in the living room. In front of him on the coffee table are various reports on pregnancy, parenting and more. His head is leaning on his hands as he takes a deep breath. Have you opened his package yet? He wonders, unable to think clearly, when he hears the key in the door lock and runs into the hallway as if stung by a tarantula. His eyes are wide as he looks at you, standing rooted to the spot in the doorway, not knowing how to react.
āShinsuke... Drove me here...ā you say. āI opened your package.ā You continue, watching Suna swallow hard, still not moving an inch from the doorframe. āHow are you, the baby?ā he asks quietly, almost absent-mindedly, as if he canāt believe youāre really standing in front of him. āGood... can... can we talk?ā you ask and watch him nod, having trouble sorting out his feelings. You take a step towards him, clearly seeing the dark circles, the red eyes, the slightly thinner face, as if he has lost weight. And on closer look, you can see his whole body trembling.
āIs everything you wrote in your letter true?ā you ask him, trying to keep your voice as calm as possible, even though youāre at your witsā end. āYes, yes all of it. Iām sorry for everything... I want nothing more than to see you happy. To see our baby happy. And if you want another partner by your side to be happy, if you donāt want me in your life, then I will accept that.ā Suna whispers, knowing that if he were to speak even a little louder, his voice would fail and he would cry. You take another step towards him. āWhat if I want you? Want to give it another try?ā You have barely spoken your sentence before you hear a bitter shuffle from Suna, which he seems to have been suppressing the whole time. His shaky hands carefully reach for your face before he presses his forehead against yours and says softly, āI would wish for nothing more than that.ā
Although you hesitate for a second, you finally put your hands around his back and stand with him in the doorway for a while. Neither of you says a word. Both of you let your tears run until Suna releases you at some point and gives you a kiss on the forehead. āYou shouldnāt stand for so long. Youād better get some rest,ā he says in a somewhat steady voice before helping you out of your jacket and leading you into the bedroom, where he pushes the sheets aside so you can lie down.Ā
āRin, but Iām not tired at all...ā you say, even though you are exhausted, but Suna lies down right next to you, pulling you close while his free hand moves to your stomach. āI know... But... letās just lie here like this for a moment, regain our strength before we talk... Talk about everything, our future, how I can make it up to you, our little babyā¦ Agree, baby doll?ā He whispers tiredly. Yet you also notice how all the crying is slowly making you a little tired. āAgree, Rin.ā you smile weakly, snuggling closer to him as you both fall asleep arm in arm, his hand protectively on your baby bump, your hand on his.
#haikyu x#haikyu x reader#haikyuu x reader#atsumu x reader#suna x reader#iwaizumi x reader#iwaizumi haijime x reader#atsumu miya x reader#suna rintarou x reader
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Hello! Me again! Ok, I saw this on a post however I canāt remember who originally asked for this prompt that got denied but Iām gonna write what I remember.
So the request was Humanās have been gone for a very long time, i think it was like hundreds of years or something
Anyway apparently one day Sonic, Shadow, Silver are in a unexplored area and get caught in a trap and out pops a female human child. The last of her kind, how do the boys react?
Cuz this is kinda a HUGE deal.
this took awhile lol but thank you for the ask itās a really interesting concept, anyway silvers is shorters than the others mainly because I actually donāt know much about him regardless if Iāve been a fan for years.
As long as weāre togetherĀ
Sonic, Shadow, and Silver x human child reader (separate and platonic)
āāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāā
Sonic
Now this wasnāt something he had expected when he went on his daily run.Ā
This part of town was usually isolated, just nature from that point on forward. Which is why this place was unnatural.Ā
He hadnāt noticed at first, but someoneās doohickeys were definitely out to get him.
Having to dodge and swerve many close calls. He was surprised it was making him break a sweat. But ofc, it wasnāt anything he couldnāt handle.
Quickly disarming many traps and setting them off for good, they were many of these things.. but, they had no logo.
Definitely not eggmanās then. Then whoās could it be?
Looking around, trying to find anything, there was nothing more than the usual. Oh, and the traps of course.
In fact he was considering that whoever left these had indeed left them for good.
Just when he was about to run off again he heard a creak. Tilting his head towards the source, he could feel his ears twitch.
someone was there.
They took small breaths and clearly made barely any movements. Taking slow steps forwards, creeping toward them he hears their breath fasten before abruptly stopping.
Speeding behind them, leaving dirt the air, he saw a tiny creature. They tripped forward from the impact.
Tbh he couldnāt see them to good thanks to all the dust he lifted. But that didnāt stop him from reaching out his hand towards them.
Finally having a hold of them, the saw face to faceā¦ those big eyes, facial structure,ā¦ and small body.
It was a humanā¦.a.human.child.
They didnāt blink once, breath halted in fear with tears threatening to spill.Ā They were scared.
Quickly pulling a smile, trying to make them feel safe as positive he whispered to not startle you. āhey little one.ā
Youāre breath still a bit fast paced, but you were no longer cowering. Thatās good. It means youāre warming up.
After finding out you were on your own out here he had already decided to take you.Ā
Though it seemed you had different plans. Clearly escaping every time you were almost in his grasp. He had to give you credit, you clearly knew how to use the forest to your advantage.
Itād take time to get your trust so he had to leave eventually, but heād visit you every time he could. Bringing food, some games, and from time to time his friends like tails.
For a fast lived guy, he didnāt mind taking his time with you. Knowing you might be the last he was going to make sure youād continue on.
āāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāā
Shadow
One of the sad things about being an immortal was the immortality itself.Ā
Times were a lot different from back then.Ā
After everyone had officially slept in the forever slumber he decided it was worthless to make any connections again.
But, maybe.. he shouldāve made more time for the humans. He never thought heād see the day when they were no longer around.
It broke him to even think about it.
Was he truly alone on this planet now? The thoughts have eaten him up various times by now.
Thatās why when he first encountered you he thought he was hallucinating. Especially since you were a child. He must have really missed Maria if his own brain was this cruel.
Only until he feels a small hand holding his own does he realize youāre not made up. Youāre real. And heās crying.Ā
Pulling you into a hug. Craving physical affection, company, and comfort. He hold you close, taking in all your warmth, and you do the same, your small arms wrapping around him.
Almost as if you understood the exact pain he was feeling.
He doesnāt know where you came from, or why youāre here, but heāll be damned to let you go on your own.
He was going to make sure your tiny life was the best with him around now.
āāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāā
Silver
The future was strange to say the least. Thanks to traveling back in time it was much better than what it used to be.
But one thing he noticed different from the the now to the past was the fact humans were no more.
He was indeed surprised, glad to have been able to meet some the few times heās been in the past.
Which os why from the moment he met you he bombarded you with questions. Your small brain couldnāt keep up.Ā
Regardless, he was determined to be a good guardian for you when he found out you were completely alone.
In fact, heās so serious about it. He even went back to the past to know how to take better care for you and bring you some stuff like food and toys.
He was prepared to do anything if it meant youād live a long healthy life, as it should have been.
āāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāāā
masterlist
#Brainrot got to me#x reader#sonic#shadow the hedgehog#sth x reader#sth#sth fandom#silver#sonic x reader#shadow x reader#sliver the hedgehog#silver x reader#child reader#fluff#long story short
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Ok loved the Seb maid post, but now Iām curious about the other Bachelors having a maid kink š Your work is š„š„š„š„
Thank you for the compliment, anon! Thankfully, I have a whole laundry list for the bachelors and how they'd be with a maid!reader <3 (Sorry this took so long to get out anon! Thanksgiving break + getting ready for finals, and Christmas has me in a chokehold rn š)
Warning(s): Rough Sex (For Shane and Alex mostly tbh), Munch Elliot, Sub!Harvey,
SDV Bachelors Having A Maid Kink
Shane
Y'all already know I have beef with this man so I'll start the slander early.
He's putting you to work, you're going to earn your paycheck when he comes into the cafe. And not through breaking your back trying to fulfill his seemingly never-ending orders of drinks, or him inviting you over to do cutesy hand signs, oh no, that's just part of the job.
I'm talking, he'll be the last customer to leave, and why? Because he has to fulfill his trope of being the "Ugly Bastard" that's always spotted in those NTR mangas (aka bending you over the cashier counter while fucking you to the point of nearly being braindead, all while you tell him how much you just loooveeee your master)
ā” - "C'mon maid, it's like you're not even trying to earn a fat tip."
This guy had been in the cafe since the early evening. For a while now, he'd been watching you and practically breaking your back with the amount of requests he'd been giving you! From requesting drink after drink after drink, to inviting you over to perform little love songs and even draw hearts in his drinks. It'd been non-stop and you were nearly sick of it! So sick of it in fact, that you hadn't even noticed how your customer had been practically eye-fucking you your entire shift. He imagined bending you over and fucking you stupid on almost every piece of furniture available in the cafe.
But his favorite location so far? The cashier counter.
The idea of someone walking in and witnessing him plow the cutest maid of the cafe until she was sobbing for more of his dick had him sporting the biggest hard-on he's ever had in his life.
Luckily, however, his dreams and fantasies seem to be coming true more often lately.
"F-Fuck!" You whined when Shane suddenly slapped your ass, your eyes beginning to well up with tears from the pain as it started to mix in with the pleasure, his cockhead bullying your poor cervix as you grabbed at the edge of the counter for dear life. Shane chuckled when one of your hands came behind you to weakly push at his thigh, hoarse whines and moans of 'Gimme a break' leaving your kiss-swollen lips. "You sure you want a break cutie?" He cooed. "You look like you're enjoying my cock soooooo much though~" As he leaned down, he pressed some of his weight down onto you, his hot breath fanning against your ear as his hands on the sides of your waist pulled you onto his cock even harder.
"If you really want a break, then beg your master a bit more properly."
You sucked in a breath, your pussy clenching harder around Shane's length at the way his words rolled off his tongue. "Well?" He panted, grabbing at your hair to pull your head up so he wouldn't miss anything you said. And eventually, you shook your head, a laugh nearly erupting from Shane as you had basically admitted to him that you loved his cock way too much to even think of a break.
And since that was the caseā "Get your hand off my thigh then slut," He tsked. You gasped when he grabbed your wrists and pinned them to your sides, using the new leverage to fuck into you even harder, tearing groans and high-pitched whines from your throat as the feeling of the veins along the sides of Shane's thick cock rubbed against your walls threatened to make your head spin. "L-Love your cock...!" You said, a brainless giggle leaving your mouth at the end. One that nearly made Shane gasp with how much harder he suddenly got at your words and how shamelessly you said them.
"What was that?" Impossibly, he fucked you even harder, the fat of your ass rippling at the sheer force of his thrusts, creating a delicious scene that Shane struggled to take his eyes off of as you tried to look at him over your shoulder. "Say that again."
"M-Master..." You moaned. "L-Love your cock!" Your thighs trembled at the force of your impending orgasm, drool dribbling down the corner of your lips as the knot in the pit of your stomach grew almost unbearably hot. "Iloveitloveitloveitloveittttt!" Your customer smirked at your crying devotion to his dick, his grip around your wrists tightening as a deep groan escaped his throat with how you suddenly squirted all over his dick, your gushing heat pushing him to his own orgasm as he suddenly pressed himself as deep as he could go into your pussy.
A long sigh drew out of your lips, your forehead falling against the counter as you moaned softly to the feeling of your customer's thick cum filling up your insides.
By far, he had to be your favorite master.
Elliot
King of Respect. Very mindful, very demure.
His kink comes in the form of the trope of "Maid does a poor job of cleaning so the master has to teach her how to do her job correctly".
You accidentally spilled tea on Elliot's lap while serving it to him? No problem! Not only would he help you clean, but he'd even give you tips on how to properly serve and clean up your messes, how generous!
In a more straightforward term, it's Elliot being the classical munch.
ā” - Your customer was really good at teaching you how to be a better maid.
When you had accidentally spilled tea on his lap earlier, you had expected him to be angry and cause such a commotion that it'd spark your boss to come out of his office and fire you on the spot! But, he hardly flinched when the room-temperature tea touched him, simply waving it off with a smile and telling you not to worry your head about it.
In fact...he was even willing to teach you how to properly serve tea, as well as how not to spill it so clumsily! And this teaching was, by far, the best one you could have ever gotten from a customer you had just met twenty minutes prior. "Mmm...don't spill the tea dear," Your customer warned from behind you as he sucked your cute clit, slurping up your juices and licking his lips like a dog would lick its chops after a meal. "Otherwise, we'd have to reset the timer, and that wouldn't be fun for you...wouldn't it?" You whined at the feeling of Elliot's long tongue fucking in and out of your cunt, the teacup on top of the serving plate shaking so loudly that you feared someone would come in to witness you being eaten out by a customer.
However, Elliot was good with stealing away any such frivolous thoughts when his fingers began to tease your sex while his lips teasingly kissed your thighs and ass. "Keep still dear," You almost hear the smirk on his ridiculously soft lips. "The cup sounds like it's about to fall~" A shudder ran throughout your body when Elliot suddenly stuck a finger inside of you while his other hand came to massage your ass.
You, oh so badly, wanted to tell your customer to hurry up and make you cum. For the last ten minutes or so, you'd been dangling on the ultra-fine line between cumming and not cumming, each time you'd clench your twitching cunt around Elliot's fingers or your clit would throb in his mouth, he'd suddenly tear himself away and smirk in your face like a wicked fox!
"You can't cum just yet, you haven't learned how to properly do you job yet..." He'd say it in such an alluring voice that it was useless to try and talk back to him, to bat your eyes and attempt to convince him to make you cum. Not that you were complaining exactly, such a handsome man eating you out? His eyes hooded as he focused intensely on his work of making you feel as if you were always seconds away from cloud nine.
And rapidly, you were beginning to approach that peak once again. "M-Master..." You whispered as seductively as you could in the moment without sounding like a shaken-up rabbit. "Please...let me cum," You begged, shaking your ass ever so slightly in an attempt to have his fingers dig further into you.
You clenched when he hummed against you, his fingers leaving your weeping sex with a lewd 'pop'. "Hm...should I?" He moaned when he licked your slick off of his fingers, your taste only making him strain even harder against his slacks. "Have you learned how to properly do your job dear?" You nodded your head all too eagerly, panting out a series of 'Yesyesyesyes!' to your lover as you watched him through blurry eyes slowly stand up from his position behind you. Your tongue licked across your bottom lip as Elliot started to undo his belt.
"If that's the case, I suppose we should put your words to the test, hm?"
Sam
Similar to Sebastion, but I think he would like the possibly of "corrupting" a maid. When he went with Sebastion to Zuzu City and saw how you were doing such a good job, being nice and polite to the customers and generally just being so pretty that he could hardly believe his eyes.
All he could wonder was "What if I molded her to be the perfect maid for me?"
And so he did, classic blondie with blue eyes style, he flirted his way until you (during your work shift mind you!) led him to the storage room in the back and flipped up your skirt for him without a second thought.
ā” - "You're sooooo pretty, miss~"
Amid the lewd sound of your customer's balls slapping against your clit, your skirt flipped up to reveal your ass as your customer currently groped your chest over your clothes. He'd been repeating that same sentence to you for the last few minutes since you had snuck him into the breakroom! Choked-up moans and high-pitched whines tore from your throat as he fucked you into the breakroom's dirty couch, all as if you were some cheap whore!
And to be frank, you might as well have been one at this moment.
Your customer was just too charming when he flirted with you so shamelessly as you worked, nearly forgetting all about his poor friend who eyed you up and down just as much as the blonde did! Thankfully for Sam, however, you found his charms to be just a little cuter, which is why he was balls-deep inside of you right now, cooing all sorts of cute praises in your ear as he hugged your body to his torso like he was afraid that you'd disappear the second he eased up.
"S-Such a cute fucking pussy..." Sam whined in your ear, his rhythm beginning to stutter as he felt himself approaching his high almost embarrassingly fast. "Please...pleasepleaseplease let me cum inside baby," He pleaded. Your cunt tightened around his length at his begging, a gasp leaving your lips when Sam's hand traveled from your breasts to flip up your skirt even more, all so he could rub your throbbing clit. "Fuck!" You cried at the almost mind-numbing pleasure.
Your pulse raced in your ears, your juices dripping from your pussy even more now that he was rubbing your clit like he was just begging for you to go insane! Your arms started to shake, your head lifting tiredly to look over your shoulder at the tear-eyed blonde as you could've sworn you saw hearts form in his eyes when he opened them to look at you. "T-Too much..." You whined. "Baby, please...you're so fucking deep...c-can't handle...it!"
"Yes you can," He insisted before pressing his lips against yours. He whispered a soft 'you have to' against your lips as his lithe fingers increased their movement on your clit even more, constantly switching between a pace of teasingly slow and mind-numbingly fast. Your hand shot to Sam's wrist, fruitlessly trying to get him to slow down before you had let out a drawn-out moan against Sam's lips as you climaxed. Your cunt clenching so impossibly tight on his cock that the blonde could only manage a few more thrusts before he stilled against you with a groan.
The warmth of his cum flooding your insides almost made you sleepy, along with your shaky arms and how tired you were, it only increased that feeling by tenfold as you hesitantly parted your lips from your customer's, a single string of spit still connecting the both of you as Sam held a lovesick look in his eyes.
He took a moment to further catch his breath before he spoke. "When...when do you get off? So I can see you again."
Alex
Okay so hear me out, I can't see Alex going to a maid cafe butā
I can see his grandparents hiring a maid to help out around the house. Every day from 9am to 7pm.
The way you so sweetly helped out his grandparents made his heart skip beats, and the way his grandmother referred to you as a daughter only solidified his budding crush on you!
The final nail in the coffin, however? It was when you were cleaning his room and, in the middle of you changing his bedsheets, the sight of you bent over his bed nearly made him dizzy with how fast blood rushed to his dick.
It was only natural that he decided to fuck you on his bed while his grandparents were out!
ā” - You loved working for Evelyn and George.
When you first came to the valley searching for a job, the older couple hired you without a second thought! And they paid extremely well for such an otherwise simple job description, all you had to do was clean the house, cook a few meals when Evelyn was unable, and even occasionally help Evelyn water her plants! It was the perfect job, and that wasn't even taking into consideration that the couple's grandson was very handsome.
And he thought the same way about you as well. After a long day of working, sometimes he'd be blessed by Yoba enough to spot your skin shiny with sweat. The sight of droplets falling in between the valley of your breasts when he'd see you sitting down for a moment to catch your breath, tired from an hour straight of cleaning...his cock would get hard so fast that it nearly left him dizzy.
Suddenly, he couldn't function right if he didn't quickly excuse himself to go masturbate in the shower, imagining your mouth sucking on his cockhead as he gently coaxed you into taking him even further into your mouth. Your hands bracing yourself against his muscled thighs as the warmth of your tight mouth would eventually have him finishing inside and down your throat.
Alas, it was only a daydream.
Until it wasn't, one day he walked in on you changing his bedsheets, your dress unknowingly riding up your ass as you bent over to fit the sheets onto his bed. The poor guy nearly passed out from how hard he got! Luckily for him and you, he was able to release all that pent-up tension he had for you on you. Which left him with the only viable option leftā
Fuck you like a dog on his bed! And thankfully, Alex's grandparents were out.
"Fuucckk..." Alex moaned into your ear, his body currently curled over yours as his arms wrapped around you to pull you even tighter against his body. Your cunt was addicting, in fact, he almost felt insulted that you were walking around his grandparents' house with such an unbelievably tight pussy! Pliant and eager to take every inch of his dick while making the lewdest noises.
"Maybe you should quit being a maid, huh?" He purred in your ear.
You gasped when he nipped the shell of your ear, your arms beginning to shake more and more as Alex fucked into your cunt even harder. His thick length was rubbing against allll the right spots inside of you. "C-Can't handleāFuck!"
Alex laughed. "C-Can't handle? What?" He mocked you. "My dick? Maybe you shouldn't have looked so good bent over my bed." You could imagine a smirk decorating his face as you felt his dick twitch inside of you, the embarrassing sounds of your pussy seeming to grow louder as you rapidly approached your orgasm. Yet when his cockhead began to batter against your cervix, that delicious sting of pain made you crumble over as you submitted to your sudden orgasm. "Fuck yeah, juussttt like that~"
Alex's hands grabbed at your skin as he leaned back, situating his hands on your hips to pull you back onto his cock even harder as he enjoyed the sight of your gushing pussy practically having a seizure on his cock. When you whined from overstimulation, however, Alex couldn't help but sigh, he almost felt bad that he had to ignore your cute whines for the moment! It was far too hard for him to part from your cute cunt just yet, especially when he wasn't even close to his orgasm. "Bear with me for a little longer, will you pretty?" He chuckled.
"I'm not even close to being finished with you yet~"
Harvey
Kinda similar to Elliot and Alex's in a way? You were hired to help keep his place cleaning, after all, being a doctor meant that Harvey had an extremely busy schedule and thus couldn't be at home all the time!
When he first met you, he already thought you were super kind-hearted and seemed extremely dedicated to your job. He couldn't help how he developed a little bit of a liking towards you at first meeting!
But, like any man, there was always a fall.
And his fall came pretty fast when he came home a little earlier than usual one day, you were on your knees wiping some spilled cleaning fluid off the wooden floorboards.
The outline of your underwear against your dress was so lewd that Harvey fell like a stack of cards against the wind.
ā” - A pair of writhing bodies were on the floor, moaning and panting as hands ran over each other's respective bodies and beads of sweat dripped down their skins. Harvey had a mind to feel bad with how quickly he suggested you clean something else when he had spotted you on the ground, yet luckily for him, you were willing and all too eager to take up a new cleaning task.
One that quickly turned from you sucking him off to you now fucking him like a bitch in heat on the floor, your face tucked into the side of his neck as your ass slapped against his thighs, his hands grasping at your sides desperately in order to further aid you in fucking yourself on his dick.
"Y-Yoba Y/N...t-too fast...!" His moans were so cute, you thought.
But so unbecoming of your master! He was the one who sported an obvious hard-on when you had turned your head to see him staring at your ass so obviously! The least he could do was handle your speed as you fucked him on the floor. "Bear with it, won't you master~?" You pressed a sloppy kiss on his lips, his mustache tickling your face a little before you pressed a hand on his chest to raise yourself up a little. Your cunt clenched tighter around him at the lewd sight before you, your master being flushed in the face with lipstick marks all over him!
Cute pants and whines choked out of his throat along with confused babbling for you to both fuck him harder as well as slow down! It was quite the ego-booster, having a usually composed doctor be so easy to ruin with your pussy. "Oh please, masterā" You leaned back down to whisper in Harvey's ear as you slowed down just as he requested, instead grinding back against his cock which seemed to make the doctor whine and grab your hips even louder. "ātry to bear with me a little longer, will you please? You're too cute to let go of!" You giggled, your laughter quickly turning into gasping moans as your master started to fuck back up into you.
A tight knot quickly started to form in his stomach, sending him into a spiral of almost blinding pleasure as your pussy was practically begging to suck the cum out of his cock!
He tried to hold back, a weak and needless attempt to impress you more than he already had, but when you had kissed him, tangling your fingers into his hair. That was all he needed before he stilled against you with a muffled cry.
You sighed at the warmth that flooded inside of you, gently fucking yourself on Harvey a little more in an attempt to milk even more of his cum out of him before he whispered 'Too sensitive' against your lips. Thus, you gave him a little reprieve with a smirk. "You've been holding out on me doctor," You chuckled. "We definitely can't stop here!" Your urge to fuck yourself stupid on him grew even more when his eyes widened like a confused puppy's.
You had a new job assignment, fuck your master until he made you dumb on his dick, of course!
#stardew valley#smut#sdv#stardew farmer#sdv sebastian#sdv shane#shane sdv#sdv elliott#sdv farmer#stardew#sdv fanfic#sdv fandom#sdv smut#shane stardew valley#stardew valley harvey#stardew valley alex#stardew valley sebastian#stardew elliott#stardew shane#stardew smut#stardew fandom#stardew fanfic#stardew valley bachelors#stardew valley farmer#stardew valley shane#stardew valley elliott#stardew valley smut#stardew valley fanfic#stardew valley fandom
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Christmas Eve - Mingi
First of all.. Merry Christmas, everyone! I know I am *a bit* late to the party š but school has been stressing me out so much... and I haven't had time to write nor the proper motivation to, so I decided to delay my fics a bit in order to regain some of my motivation, since I want to give my utmost best when writing ^^. Happy holidays, and this is a great opportunity to thank everyone for all the support I've been receiving since I started writing! This place is my comfort, I love writing so much.. I love you š¤
---
pairing: bf!Mingi x gf fem!reader
genre: absolute fluff
summary: your boyfriend organised a surprise for you right in Christmas Eve.. which leaves you growing fonder of him ^^
wc: 1.3k (what a contrast between this and the ot8 one lmao)
warnings: literally no warnings, it's pure fluff ^^
Author's Note: I love writing thid tbh.. it felt like a fresh breath of air. I am all about Christmas, so y'all about to find out it took me 10 mins to write the first draft š§āāļø and 10 mins to rethink parts and finish. (pspspsps, special nye fic is coming... and itās steamy š«£)
The biting chill of the December night followed you home, your breath visible in small white puffs as you stepped out of the cab. Tugging your coat tighter around yourself, you couldnāt help but sigh. Christmas Eve had come at last, but work had been relentless. Most of your day had been spent organizing last-minute projects and ensuring everyone left the office in time for the holidays. The thought of warmth, home, and Mingi waiting for you was the only thing keeping you going.
However, as you approached your apartment door, something peculiar struck you. The hallway was darkāunusually so. The soft glow of Christmas lights, typically draped along the railing, was conspicuously absent. You paused for a moment, frowning as you set your keys in the lock. Had Mingi forgotten to turn them on?
Sliding the door open, you called out, āMingi?ā
No answer. The apartment was eerily quiet.
Shrugging off the odd sensation that prickled at your spine, you stepped inside. The familiar warmth of your shared space instantly melted some of the tension from your shoulders. After locking the door behind you, you shed your coat, scarf, and gloves, hanging them on the rack alongside your work bag. You glanced down at the fluffy slippers waiting patiently for you by the entranceāMingiās doing, no doubt. Smiling softly, you slipped them on.
The living room was just a few steps away, and as you made your way toward it, you couldnāt help but note the tantalizing scent of something delicious wafting through the air. Your curiosity piqued, you pushed open the doorāand stopped dead in your tracks.
The room was transformed into something straight out of a dream.
A digital fireplace crackled warmly on the TV screen, the flames casting a golden glow across the room. The Christmas tree stood tall and regal in the corner, its ornaments twinkling like stars under the soft light of the fairy lights strung around it. Beneath its branches, a pile of neatly wrapped gifts sat waiting to be opened.
But the centerpiece of the scene was the small table in the center of the room, set up with candles, a bottle of wine, and two plates of what looked like your favorite dishes.
āMingi?ā you called again, your voice soft this time.
From the kitchen emerged your boyfriend, a grin as bright as the Christmas star adorning the tree spreading across his face. He was dressed casually in a cozy sweater that you loved on him, his dark hair slightly tousled as if heād been hurrying to prepare everything.
āSurprise,ā he said, holding his arms out theatrically.
Your heart melted on the spot.
āMingi, what is all this?ā you asked, stepping forward, a hand flying to your chest.
āItās Christmas Eve, isnāt it? Thought Iād make it special.ā He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. āI know how hard youāve been working lately.ā
Tears stung at your eyes, but you blinked them away quickly, not wanting to ruin the moment. āThis is amazing,ā you said earnestly, reaching for him. āI canāt believe you did all this.ā
He caught your hands in his and kissed your knuckles softly. āYou deserve it. Now sit down, letās eat.ā
Mingi guided you to the table, pulling out your chair with a flourish. As you sat, he poured you a glass of wine before serving up the dishes heād prepared. Everything smelled and looked divine, from the roasted vegetables to the perfectly cooked protein.
āYou didnāt burn anything,ā you teased gently as you took your first bite.
He snorted, his face scrunching in mock offense. āWow, no faith in me at all, huh?ā
āNone whatsoever,ā you joked, earning a dramatic gasp from him.
The two of you fell into a comfortable rhythm, laughing and chatting about your day, your plans for the holiday, and reminiscing about past Christmases. The meal was delicious, and the warmth of the digital fireplace added to the cozy atmosphere.
Once the plates were cleared, Mingi brought out a tray of sweets heād picked up from your favorite bakery. As you nibbled on cookies and sipped your wine, the conversation turned to your shared memories.
āRemember when we bought that tree?ā you said, nodding toward the majestic pine in the corner.
Mingi chuckled. āHow could I forget? You almost tackled that old lady to get it.ā
āI did not!ā you protested, laughing.
āYou kind of did,ā he teased, his eyes sparkling with mischief. āBut it was worth it. Look how perfect it is.ā
The tree indeed looked perfect, its branches heavy with ornaments youād collected together over the years.
After a while, Mingi turned on a playlist of faint Christmas carols, the soft melodies filling the room. The two of you moved to the couch, the tree standing sentinel over you as you began to exchange gifts.
āOkay, okay, open mine first!ā Mingi said, nearly vibrating with excitement as he handed you a neatly wrapped box.
You couldnāt help but laugh at his enthusiasm. āAll right, all right, calm down!ā
Carefully peeling back the wrapping paper, you uncovered a small velvet box. Your heart skipped a beat as you opened it to reveal a stunning white gold necklace with a matching pair of earrings. The necklace sparkled like frost in the morning sun, and the earrings were elegant, perfectly complementing it.
āOh my God, Mingi!ā you exclaimed, your voice rising with excitement. āThis is gorgeous! How did you evenāā
āI saw it weeks ago and knew it was perfect for you,ā he said, grinning so wide it looked like his cheeks might ache. āDo you like it?ā
āLike it? I love it!ā you said, throwing your arms around him. āItās absolutely perfect!ā
You leaned back, still holding onto him, and added, āHelp me put it on?ā
Mingiās hands were steady as he clasped the necklace around your neck, his fingers brushing your skin lightly. When he was done, you turned to show him, and the way his eyes lit up made your heart flip.
āYou look beautiful,ā he murmured, his voice full of warmth.
āThank you,ā you said softly, before kissing him with all the gratitude and love you could muster.
āMy turn, my turn!ā Mingi said, bouncing slightly as he sat back.
Laughing, you handed him your gift. He tore into the wrapping paper with childlike glee, letting out an audible gasp when he opened the box inside.
āNo way!ā he exclaimed, holding up the sleek bracelet heād been admiring for months. āNo freaking way!ā
āWay,ā you replied, laughing at his reaction.
āYou remembered? I canāt believe you got this for me!ā His voice was filled with awe as he slipped the bracelet onto his wrist, admiring how it fit perfectly.
āOf course I remembered,ā you said, grinning. āYouāve been talking about it forever.ā
He leaned over and crushed you in a hug, nearly knocking you backward. āThis is the best gift ever. Thank you so much!ā
āIām glad you like it,ā you said, your cheeks aching from smiling so much.
āI love it!ā he said emphatically, leaning back just enough to kiss you.
The two of you spent the next hour unpacking the rest of the giftsāsweets, small trinkets, and other thoughtful itemsābut nothing could compare to the excitement and joy of those two special gifts.
As the night wore on, you found yourselves snuggled up together on the couch, the soft glow of the tree casting shadows on the walls. Mingiās arm was draped around your shoulders, and your head rested against his chest.
āThis is the best Christmas Eve ever,ā you murmured, your voice thick with contentment.
Mingi pressed a kiss to your temple. āItās the best because I get to spend it with you.ā
And as the carols played softly in the background and the warmth of the digital fireplace wrapped around you, you couldnāt help but agree.
NETWORKS:
@blossomnet
@illusionnet
PERMANENT TAGLIST:
@mingleshine @musiclovingfairy @crazylittlebisexual @artistic-rendition @hongjoongtime117 @cypher-03 @atiny1 @my-atiny-kookie-rkive @atzlordz
#ateez fanfic#ateez x reader#mingi s dimples masterlist#ateez fic#ateez x y/n#fanfic#ateez#fluff#ateez fluff#ateez mingi#mingi x reader#mingi fluff#song mingi#mingi#mingi cute#christmas fic#fluff fic#fluff fluff fluff
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I finally saw Les Miserables live in Milan yesterday so obligatory yap:
Okay first of all: KILLIAN DONNELLY?!?!?!? I was already excited that I was going to see him as Valjean but god that man's voice is just so beautiful. He played a spectacular Valjean, he dominated the stage and the crowd went wild every time he sang. I have no words. Just. What an experience. The whole cast was amazing but jesus, this man could do a one man show of Les mis and id give my first born to see it. Also, he carried around Marius's actor like he weighed nothing, that's so Valjean of him. Also, his soliloquy broke me, how he tried to give back the candlesticks after the bishop gave them to him, how he let the bag fall on the floor and picked it up only later. The emotion he put into his singing constantly brought tears to my eyes. What a voice. Indescribable
JAVERT!!!! Bradley Jaden was amazing. I love how much rage he gave to his character, it felt very true to the novel, on how he's compared to a wolf. In stars he's so devoted but the part that literally shook me was after he let Valjean and Marius go: he literally lost his mind and shouted "WHO IS THIS MAN" with such a wild air I literally gasped. He was unhinged during that song, so outraged and bitter and I loved it. It almost felt like he was killing himself to take Valjean's act of mercy away from him instead of his internal turmoil and honestly? I loved it. He had such a presence on stage it literally felt like he was the law. Also let's be honest, he rocked the coat
I LOVED Channa Hewitt as Fantine, She had such a warm and soft voice it felt like a mother's embrace. I cried 4 times during the show and 2 of those were Fantine's death and Fantine's part during the finale. She was perfect
Nathania Ong as Eponine????? I don't think I've ever heard someone sing her parts as perfectly as her. What a voice. Honestly I think the applauses for her were some of the longest and they were completely deserved. She made me cry. Amazing. Spectacular. I fell a little bit a lot in love. Unfortunately she missed the "He was never mine to lose" line but I think it was because her microphone wasn't connected?? Never mind she was perfect.
I know you all want to know about our boys Enjolras and Grantaire so. There wasn't much enjoltaire going on tbh but I didn't mind, I still think the actors (James D. Gish and Raymond Walsh) were perfect and I love their performance. Enjolras was completely focused on the revolution and keeping the others on track, while Grantaire mainly stuck with Gavroche all throughout. Enjolras's most positive reaction to grantaire was ironically clapping with the others at R's jokes once during Red and Black, but apart from that he was fairly hostile to him. During Drink With Me he tried to stop R from singing and bringing down morale by getting close to him and roughly saying "That's enough!" into the same microphone; after he stopped singing and everyone started moving away Enjolras tried to stop Grantaire or talk to him, he seemed kind of apologetic, but R Simply raised his bottle to him in a mock toast and then turned his back to him and I loved that, I love a bitter and petty Grantaire. Grantaire at the beginning was very amused by the whole situation and the excitement of the others, during red and black and the building of the barricade he kept hyping Gavroche up and parting his shoulder, nudging him towards the others as if it was all a game. When the first shots sounded he seemed to realize the gravity of the situation and started nudging Gavroche away and motioning for him to go away; later when the shooting for the fall of the barricade started sounding he lifted Gavroche in his arms and held him as the others started to fall until only them and Enjolras stood; then Gavroche went limp and R died with him, Enjolras died last. For the rest of the show and for Empty Chairs at Empty Tables Enjolras, Grantaire and Gavroche were on the small balcony/platform over the centre of the stage and to be honest it had a very "Father, Son and Holy Spirit" vibe in my opinion.
One Day More was absurd, it gave me chills all throughout.
When Valjean died and the bishop came in the hugged each other very hard, Valjean basically fell into the bishop's arms and that hit me hard.
Gavroche was so sassy I loved him.
Honestly everyone was perfect I literally have nothing bad to say. I think Enjolras's actor lost controls of his voice on a sillable but who cares, it was all amazing.
I also got merch! (It was all so expensive????? But I couldn't help myself). I got a tote bag with Cosette's famous illustration, a magnet and a brochure with the history of Lea Miserables and information and interviews of the World Tour cast. I also got 2 of the paper bags (they were cute okay) and my mum grabbed a literal handful of the bookmarks they were giving away lmao.
I'm sure I had something else I wanted to say but after these last 3 days my brain is completely scrambled. If any of you were at the show yesterday or are going in these days feel free to hit me up so we can go crazy together lmao
#les miserables#les mis#les miserables the arena spectacular#les mis world tour#les miaerables world tour#jean valjean#javert#killian donnelly#bradley jaden#fantine#channa hewitt#enjolras#james d gish#grantaire#raymond walsh#gavroche#eponine#nathania ong
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Power- Bucky Barnes
Authors Note: The last and final part to the avoidance series, I dragged this series out of my drafts and tbh have always hated how it ended which is why I never posted it.
Word Count: 3496
Warnings: Shitty writing, like I hated how I wrote this part.
Main Masterlist Here
Part One - - Part Two - - Part Three
(Thank you for the gif @unearthlydust )
Enjoy!
You werenāt you.
It was something Bucky had to remind himself everytime he saw you, the voice that eased himself down everytime you dashed to hide by Steve.
You looked like you, your hair a bit longer and your eyes green from the amount of power the main difference, but the physique was all yours, the very same once he had memorized after countless sleepovers with you.
But there was something unexpected about you now, that graceful stillness he had never seen you have.
Since the moment he met you it had been a whirlwind of clumsiness. Tripping, falling, dropping things and hitting your head on just about everything. At some point in the friendship he had learned how to move with you, reaching a hand over you to block you from hitting a cabinet as you stood straight or just catching you with his metal arm around your hip when you slipped on an ice sheet.
But now, you moved with an unnatural grace, keeping a hand on Steve at all times as he lead you around the kitchen to make breakfast and Bucky could do nothing but watch from his spot on the counter top, Sam seated next to him. No one said a word, and the room held a tense atmosphere as Bucky noted every single movement you made.
The graceful ease of you backing up so Steve could grab the flour, and the sheer warmth in your smile as Steve smiles down at you, his eyes gleaming. Bucky was going to kill him, what a piece of-
āI love pancakes.ā You laugh, pulling Bucky out of his thoughts as he realized Sam had asked you a question.
Steve watches you carefully as he starts pouring the pancake batter, watching how you interact with Sam in this moment.
āI donāt doubt you do. You know, Buck right here showed me this really cool diner that his friend showed him. They have pancake night every Tuesday.ā Sam smiles, and Bucky notes the way Steve tenses up but he canāt tear his eyes from you.
āBuckā¦.ā Itās like youāre testing the name on your tongue, something dimming in your eyes as your head tilts, like you were trying to picture something. Like the memories were struggling to surface.
Panic lunges at him as he realizes he might be able to make you remember, that chord tied to his ribs and chest tugging a bit. āActually you showed me! We go there every week for pancake night and rate the flavor of the week, Doll.ā
āDoll.ā You repeat, nothing more than a breathy whisper that has Steve tensing.
Nothing happens at first, and Bucky waits with a baited breath, until the plant on the fridge lunges out and all hell breaks loose.
The pot the plant was held in shatters once all the roots burst from it and Bucky moves to block you but Steve is already there, wrapping his body around you as the vines cover every surface of the room. They bend and snap at anything in their way, and though Bucky reaches for you once more Sam pulls him back with a newfound strength, making sure he didnāt get in the vines path.
Steve murmurs something, and Bucky has to tilt his head to hear the next few words, chest tightening. āI just need you to breathe, okay doll?ā
Doll. That fucking called you doll. He watches as you mouth the word, your eyebrows pinching for a moment before your face goes into one of ease and you close your eyes, breathing in and the vines stop their path of destruction.
āIām tired.ā You mumble, a small dot of red coming from your nose thatās got Bucky all but snarling when Steve reaches to wipe the blood away and kiss your forehead.
āLetās get you to your room then? Okay?ā He whispers, leading you away softly as Bucky struggles against Sams hold.
When has Sam ever been able to hold him?
As if realizing the change too Sam letās go quickly, eyes traveling his arms while Bucky blinks too.
āWhat the fuck?!ā Tony snaps, looking at the mess of the kitchen. āAlright. Team meeting now. Everyone but her!ā
-
The room was filled with that same quiet tension, everyone sat around the table as Tony prepped for the meeting, the second everyone was ready the table lit up with footage.
āStarting from the top, we found plant princess a week ago and Iām sure youāve all already noticed that something is off.ā Tony starts, making Bruce snort. āOver the past week we have had her come in for some testing to see what might be going on,ā
The footage on the screen shows you sitting in a chair with Wanda talking to you, hooked up to tons of different devices.
āYou ran testing on her?ā Bucky snaps, whirling to Steve. āYou let them test on her?ā
āI was in the room the whole time.ā Steve sighs back, eyes not leaving the footage.
āWhat we can figure out is that sheās gone on a full mental block, the amount of energy that her powers are taking up has wrapped her in a blanket of sorts.ā Bruce explains. āThe last time we found her it was the same, itās like the power beneath her skin is a moving breathing creature that needs to protect them.ā
āSheās never said that beforeā¦.ā Nat mumbles, eyes showing nothing but shock.
āWell sheās almost always been able to control it. Her and the power working together at her will. But when we originally found her things werenāt the same.ā
Bucky had talked to you a bit about life back then, but neither of you got into gruesome details. There was always a line that you both had drawn to keep from heading back to the dark place.
āShe never told you about anything regarding this?ā Nat asks him.
āWe talked about most things, but there were things we didnāt talk about. There were boundaries for both of us.ā Bucky shrugged, not liking the way Nat was looking at him. āWe had boundaries, believe it or not.ā
She merely blinked at him before whipping her head away.
āI hadnāt known that Stevie was the one to find her.ā Bucky snips, enjoying the way Steves jaw tenses as his fists clench.
āWe found that Cornell, one of the scientists left from the war- or well his son- had taken up his fathers assignment and had been experimenting on people. When we breached the compound we foundā¦.. her. Wrapped up in vines just to keep warm, looking wild and hiding from us. She was terrified,ā steve explains. āI was the first person to talk to her. She kind of clung to me after that.ā
āClung?ā Nat asks.
Steve shrugs. āWe became best friends. Untilā¦.ā
He doesnāt have to say it, no one in the room has to say it. Until Bucky.
Bucky never realized that he had stolen you from Steve. Had never cared..,ā¦ and he doesnāt care now. āSo what can I do to help her.ā
āRight now? Donāt push the process. That might have been what triggered her outbreak today, she dug for the memories and the power leeched.ā Tony sighs.
āSoā¦ā
āSo, Tin Man, you need to keep your distance for a bit.ā Tony snaps.
āWhat?! No!ā
āOh come on Buck. I figure this would be the easiest task for you.ā Steve snipes and Bucky all but lunges across the table.
Bullshit. He would not. Everyone nods, agreeing that Bucky will stay away. He. Does. Not.
-
Is it a shock that the very next day Bucky goes out of his way to find you? No.
He finds you sitting in a window seat, letting the sunlight hit your skin as you keep your eyes closed from the warmth. There is no one near you, surprising since Nat and Steve had been hovering around you since they brought you back, and he takes his chance while he can.
Even if you donāt remember him he just wants to hear your voice.
āHey.ā He whispers, moving closer but not enough to crowd you as you open your eyes. āMind if Iā¦..ā
He points with his flesh hand to the spot across from you and you pull your legs in to give him room so that he may sit, a smile gracing his features as the sun warms him up instantly.
āYou like this spot?ā
āItās the only quiet place here.ā You mumble, shrugging.
āQuiet?ā
āI can hear pain.ā
āIām sorry?ā He blurts, head tilting as he stares at you, heart thundering.
āItāsā¦. Right here.ā You bring your finger up and press it lightly in the center of his forehead. āBeating against everything, whispering where everyone is hurt.ā
āIt tells you where everyone is hurt?ā He whispers, his voice not strong enough to speak any louder.
You donāt answer him at first, but you slide your finger down the side of this face to his neck and once you get to his chest you add more fingers until your full hand is pressing against his chest, right over his heart.
āYou hurt here.ā You murmur, your eyes glowing a bright green. āBut I canāt fix itā¦.ā
āItās not your job to fix it.ā He smiles lightly. āBut I can promise ya that you being here helps.ā
āYou talk like I know you.ā
āDonāt you?ā And there it is again, that unnatural grace as you quirk your head to the side and your eyebrows pinch together.
You get that foggy look, like you can almost see him, before youāre snapping your hand back. āYou were mad.ā
āNo.ā He croaks, pain flooding his chest. He didnāt want you to remember him that way, didnāt want you to think he was mad those last couple days. āI was never-ā
āHey.ā Nat snaps, and you sit ramrod straight, backing away from Bucky. āBucky youāre wanted in the training rooms.ā
āNot right now Nat.ā
āBucky-ā
āNot. Right. Now.ā He snaps, but itās too late, Steve is coming around the corner with wide eyes until they land on you.
āI was looking for you, you said you wanted to tour the med center.ā And just like that you are gone, following Steve down to the med area that you had made for the general public.
-
It isnāt long until the blue eyed brunette finds you again, the pull on your rib cage drawing your attention to the door where he slowly enters.
You had spent 4 hours in the med bay, Steve having to leave you a little while ago to help with an issue, and you had taken to helping out people who came in. There was something natural about this, like you had done it every day. But you had no recollection of it.
Just like the man with the metal arm, you felt like you knew him, every inch and emotion of him. But he was still nowhere in your memory.
When he spots you his eyes widen a bit before he is making his way over, something clutched in his hand as the girl in front of you prays under her breath before hopping down and rushing to tell her mother what you did.
āAre you okay?ā The stranger asks, flesh hand reaching out to touch your cheek as you try to blink away some of the light in your eyes.
The girls mother sobs loudly, and both of them are rushing back to thank you, but you had no clue why. Where had they come from?
The stranger keeps a hand on your shoulder as you blink at them, your body set aflame as they both begin praying again.
āWhere am I?ā Where am I? Where am I? Where am I. āIs Cornell coming?ā
āOkay. I think thatās enough for today.ā The stranger mumbles, his tone filled with panic and fear as his hand slides down to grab your arm, pulling it back with a hiss of pain as just the touch burns him. āWait. No. Focus.ā
Who is he talking to?
Where were you?
āHey. Can you hear me?ā A voice sounds out and you try to find it. Who was talking? What was that feeling?
It hurt, something was hurting you. Burning. You were burning from the inside out.
āClear everyone out!ā A new voice calls as something wraps around you tightly, crushing you tightly to pick you up.
There was so much light and so much pain.
You couldnāt see anything, and soon enough the ringing in your ears started.
-
āGET THE SHOWER STARTED!ā Bucky yells, keeping you clutched to his chest as you burn through his tactical suit, eyes glowing brightly while blood pours from your nose.
āThat doesnāt look good man.ā Sam grunts, helping lead the way to the locker rooms as Bucky carries you in his arms, breathing out as he tries not to focus on the burning.
āJust get the shower started.ā He grunts in pain, panic coating his body and his mouth going dry.
The second Sam has the water running he is reaching for the next nozzle, going around the shower section until every single shower was running with cold water, Bucky kneeling in the center with cradled in his arms.
Within seconds youāre both drenched, and the water hits your skin with a hiss before it begins steaming around you, but slowly your body begins to cool down.
He doesnāt know how long he sits with you under all the showers, laying you across his thighs so he can cradle your head closer and wipe away some of the blood that had poured from your nose.
āBuck.ā Someone calls, but he canāt drag his eyes away from you, right as youāre cracking your eyes open.
āIt hurts.ā You whimper, and his heart all but shatters.
āIām sorry Doll.ā He whispers back, leaning to press his forehead against yours. He feels your hand reach up, shaking from exhaustion as you press it to his chest, right over his heart.
āI can feel your pai-ā
āDonāt focus on that right now.ā He orders gently. āFocus on something else.ā
āTheyāre all in pain-ā
āNo no no. Think about pancakes, yeah? Or maybe that book thatās coming out? You remember? You all but dragged me to the book signing the last time one came out.ā He tries to smile down at you, keeping you lifted enough so your foreheads stay pressed together. āThink about ice skating or ornaments on a tree.ā
āItās raining.ā You blurt, body coiling closer to his. He is confused at first, then realizes that you must be confusing the heavy water falling on you as rain. āI donāt like the rain.ā
āI know. I know.ā He murmurs, holding you closer. āIāve got ya Doll. Aināt gonna let anything happen to ya,ā
āBuck.ā You sob, eyes closing. āI donāt feel good.ā
āI know.ā His chest felt so tight, and tears were beginning to fall from his eyes onto your cheeks. āIām sorry. You want Steve?ā
āBucky.ā You sob again, the hand that was covering his heart clenching into what was left of his leather jacket from his tactical gear.
āIām here. Iām here. What do you need?ā God just help her. Find a way to help her please. Anything anything anything.
āI canāt stop it.ā Your eyes open again, once again glowing brightly, so much so that he has to close his own from how bright they are. But he keeps his arms wrapped around you, tight. āBuck, itās-ā
There a feeling in his own chest, expanding and expanding and expanding, he feels like his lungs are constricting and every molecule in his body is about to burst. Heās sure itās what youāre feeling right now Iām tenfold so he merely pulls you as tight as he can.
āLet go. You gotta let go doll.ā He breathes out, eyes still slammed shut as he grunts out as your skin starts heating again.
āNot with you-ā you sob. āGo!ā
āNo. I can take it doll. Iām not leaving.ā He murmurs, pressing his forehead to your cheek, no matter how much it burns. āI swore to never leave you again.ā
Itās then he realizes that you had been speaking to him, you had remembered him and it all makes sense. That blanket of protection you had formed for yourself wasnāt a cocoon from memories. It was keeping this power trapped in tight, your emotions connected to it.
āI can take it. Just let go.ā
You scream, pure pain and torture sounding as your body heats even more. Thereās a loud shout of both your names, the flash of red white and blue nearby and a dash of red hair lunging to the man holding the shield.
Buckys body freezes up and he keeps you held tight as you unleash that power, finally letting everything you had bottled up go.
He feels nothing but pain, heat and burning the main source. All his bones felt like they were breaking and his heart squeezed in his chest, but he kept his hold on you. Even as he succumbed to the pain and the darkness consumed him.
-
You wake up in your own bed, tucked tightly into a roll of blankets like a worm, body aching. When you struggle to sit up a hand reaches out to help you, sturdy on your side as you blink in the afternoon sunlight.
āHey there.ā The voice is calm, but there is a small hint of panic laced into it. And you already know that Bucky was doing his best to play cool.
āI hurt.ā You mumble, closing your eyes and trying to relax your body once more since the pain was just a little too much.
Itās silent for a moment and youāre close to passing back out before there is something pressed to your lips, and immediately your drinking water as Bucky helps you gulp it down.
āEasy.ā He mumbles, hissing in pain at the movement on his ribs. You stop drinking finally, gasping for air as he takes the cup away and means to put it on the nightstand, you lay flat, pain in your back splintering.
āIām sorry.ā
āWeāll talk about it all later.ā He sighs, flesh hand sliding to find your own as you both succumb to the darkness once more.
-
He awakes with you wrapped in his arms, and he already knows heās still tense, serum or not your power had done a number on him.
You were still sleeping, curled tight in his arms and your fists clenched in his shirt as everything began focusing in his head.
He had originally woken up in the hospital, body immediately jolting and searching for you as Steve and Sam tried holding him down.
It had taken all but 30 minutes for him to get to where they were keeping you, hanging from Steve and Samās arms as they dragged him through the halls.
Your temps were normal, and you were going in and out of consciousness, it was decided that once Bucky was released you would be too. Only you would be taken to your room so you could sleep off some of the powers shock to your system.
Bucky himself had carried you to your room, pain or not, and when he had tried to leave you merely kept ahold of him. He had been with you since.
There is clanking in the kitchen beyond your door and he already knows the team is probably about to bombard you both like mother hens.
āI can hear your heart.ā You mumble, voice cracking as youāre just waking up, keeping your ear pressed to his chest l. āItās really slow.ā
āIām relaxed.ā He mumbles back, trying to blink back some of the grogginess. āWhat was that?ā
āA breakdown.ā
āObviously.ā He laughs, his sides aching as he does so. āHave you been holding onto all that power this entire time?ā
āYeah. Itās easier to control without stress.ā You explain, struggling to sit up. āAnd lately Iāve been-ā
āCause of me.ā
āNoā¦..ā you lie, blinking. āWell yeah.ā
āIām sorry.ā
āItās okay.ā
āNo itās not.ā He sighs, trying to sit up with you, his forehead pressed to your shoulder. āI justā¦.ā
āI know.ā
āYou know?ā
āIā¦.. I could feel everyoneās pain, and yours was right there.ā
āSo you know I was avoiding you because-ā
āYes.ā
āAnd you know I -ā
āYes. James.ā You smile. āAnd just for the record, I love you too.ā
A smile breaks out on his own face, leaning closer to you as he inhales. āWe need to find a better outlet for your power. Because that was terrifying.ā
He missed your shoulder then, before leaning to kiss your lips passionately. He would find a way to keep you with him, forever.
-
That outlet became a gardenā¦.. more like your very own rainforest.
Any time you felt that power rush up you went there, and just released it to the earth.
(I never posted this series when I originally wrote it awhile ago because I hated the ending. Still do hate it)
TAGLIST:::
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#marvel#marvel imagine#marvel angst#marvel smit#marvel smut#marvel fluff#bucky barnes imagines#bucky barnes fic#bucky barnes smut#bucky imagine#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes au#bucky barnes x reader#bucky fanfic#bucky barnes is king#bucky barnes#bucky barnes fluff#bucky barnes imagine#bucky barnes angst#bucky barnes x you
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Day 3 ā Poppy āĖā§ ļ¾
Submission for @olba-week-event
MC: Ai/Sky
I wasn't actually going to do day 3 because I couldn't come up with an idea that didn't have Cove in the spotlight š but inspiration hit me at the last minute so this one was a bit of a rush job, my apologies. On the plus side, Ai's little sailor onsie will forever give me life so that was a delight to work on. She had huge aspirations to become one when she was a kid - always wanted to be on a ship and had a lot of sailor themed things in her room (even tried to stow away on a ship once and actually succeeded, but only for a day before someone found her out LOL, the moms were not pleased). As you can guess though, meeting Mr. Shark-man Holden and his sea themed son was the highlight of her youth š¤£ she's had many long and very serious conversations with Cliff about buying a boat. She used her serious voice and her serious face and everything! Cliff could barely resist! He almost caved when Cove came in for back up but the moms brought up the stow away story and that sobered him up pretty damn quick LMAO Now, on a more personal moment here. My stepdad likes to retell this story of how we first met, whenever he's in an emotional enough mood š I was a very impulsive kid (putting it mildly) and I didn't know him at all but, despite that, the first thing I did was run right up to him and hug him around the legs and say "Hello!" with my big smile and he had no idea what to do because he was used to people not being like that with him at all. Yet there I was, already liking him, not knowing how big of an impact that was going to have on him. He retells this story maybe once or twice a year and there's just something so genuinely soft and sweet about watching a 50 odd year old man still get moved to tears, years later, as he says "You chose me." like it still baffles him even now - especially when you know he's the type of man that doesn't rely on support or comfort from other people, but takes that comfort from you - the child he chose too.
Cliff feels like he's that type of man to me, tbh š Maybe it's because I understand his background so easily or because he's always doing things that I recognise as responses to that background, but he reminds me a lot of my stepdad and a lot of myself too honestly. So, a big big Big part of me just loves the idea of this stubborn, independent, self made man who is always putting the comfort and happiness of others as his top priority also getting so damn emotional when he gets to sit down and do normal happy family things with the kids that love him so dearly as well. Like, I just want this man to look around at the people in his life and know, deep in his heart and soul, that they want him to be there š„ŗ maybe his parents didn't, but they just missed out on everything that he had to offer honestly. The family he has now knows his value and it's not in what he's willing to do, but simply in him being who he is. That's worthy of love.
Anyways š I could probably ramble on about Mr. Cliff Holden for hours if I'm not careful. So, I'll just leave this here and continue loving my two ocean boys unconditionally, as they deserve! š
#OLBA Week#OLBA Week 2024#olba#our life#cliff holden#our life cliff#ol cliff#our life cove#cove holden#olba mc#mc china#our life beginnings and always#iwrite art#iwrite rambles#found family#ol:ba#olba prompt
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reader comforting sad ethan?? like could be something his dad was suggesting/saying and ethans really frustrated. had prob been avoiding girlfriend! reader for a bit bc of the whole plan thing. hes prob reconsidering it all bc its been the happiest hes been in his LIFE and he feels like a shitty bf for the shit abt to happen. but he obviously cant talk abt it so he tries to shut her out, which doesnt work clearly. its up to you if you wanna include smut (tbh dont see dom! ethan existing here) but definitely just angst to fluff! this boy needs a hug ):
Okay, hi! I was about to go to bed when I got this request, and just HAD to write it. No smut, I thought it was better without it. I hope you like it:)
Everything We Need - Ethan Landry x Fem!Reader
Summary: Your boyfriend is feeling guilty about being Ghostface, and wants to do whatever he can to protect you.
A/N: I LOVE THIS. There's just something about sad Ethan that makes me love him even moreš„¹
When Ethan met up with Quinn and his dad, he felt sick to his stomach. The plan that had been in the works for a year was coming to fruition, as two wannabe Ghostfaceās had met their demise. He really wanted to back out. For the first time in his life, he had someone in his life that made him want to get up every day, and thatās been weighing heavy on his mind.
āEthan, are you listening?ā Wayne asked, Quinn rolling her eyes.
āHeās probably thinking about his girlfriend,ā she scoffed, as Wayneās face got even more serious.
āYou need to keep your head in this. Donāt you let some little bitch keep you from doing what weāre all here to do,ā he said, scanning his sons face. āRichie would never let me down.ā
His dad always used that against Ethan. Richie and his dad were so close, while Ethan didnāt get the whole father-son bonding experience he craved. Thatās why he agreed to go along with this plan in the first place. He wanted his fathers love so badly that he was willing to kill for it.
āI know, dad. I wonāt let you down,ā he said, as Wayne started to discuss the plan further.
āWait, does Ethanās little girlfriend have to die, too?ā Quinn asked, as a lump formed in Ethanās throat.
āShut the fuck up, Quinn!ā Ethan yelled, as his dad stood there, thinking about the best way to respond.
āShe might. I donāt know yet. You might want to distance yourself from her. If she finds out, she will have to die,ā Wayne said, as Ethanās eyes started to water. A single tear slipped down his cheek, quickly wiping it away with his hand.
āEthan, I donāt think I can count on you for this. Your head is obviously somewhere else, as usual,ā he said, shaking his head. āWhy canāt you be strong like Richie was?ā
The rest of their meeting consisted of Ethan getting berated by Quinn and his father. He knew he needed to keep you safe, so he decided that maybe he should put a little distance between the two of you. He felt like shit that your friends were on the literal chopping block, and he knew how badly this would hurt you if you ever found out he was a part of it.
He ignored every text youād sent him for the last few days. He declined every FaceTime. You were really starting to worry about him. Aside from the worrying, your heart hurt, because youād just taken his virginity before he stopped talking to you. You couldnāt help but wonder if that had anything to do with why he pretty much ghosted you.
As you were on your way to Sam and Taraās, you sent Ethan another text asking if he was going to be there. You hoped for a reply, but you never got one.
You sat around the living room with Anika, Mindy, Tara, and Quinn when Chad walked in. You waited for Ethan to walk in, but he never did.
āHey, whatās up, guys?ā Chad said, taking a seat next to Tara.
āWhereās Ethan?ā Tara asked, knowing you wanted the answer.
āOh, he was going to come, but he decided last minute to stay at the dorm,ā Chad said, before looking over to you, āHe didnāt tell you he wasnāt coming?ā
āNo,ā you whispered, as Quinn rolled her eyes. She couldnāt stand you and hoped that Ethan wouldnāt have taken their dadās advice. She wanted nothing more than to make you one of her victims.
āThatās really weird,ā Mindy said, a confused look on her face. āMaybe you should go check on him.ā
āHe ignores me every time I try to contact him,ā you said, āI donāt think he wants to see me.ā
āThatās definitely weird because he wonāt shut up about how much he misses you.ā
You were so confused, but you tried to ignore the urge to go see him. Maybe he was just going through something and needed space, but you still thought it was strange that he didnāt tell you what was going on with him.
As everyone got ready to leave, you pulled Chad to the side.
āIs Ethan okay?ā you asked, as Chad shook his head.
āHeās always talking about you, but he isnāt sleeping. Heās barely eating. I donāt know whatās going on with him,ā he responded, a little bummed that his friend wasnāt doing well.
āI think Iām going to go see him,ā you sighed, pulling your jacket on.
āIāll be there soon, I want to hang out with Tara for a little bit,ā he said.
You nodded as you grabbed your phone and started the walk to his dorm. When you got there, you knocked on the door, hoping that he was home.
Your mouth dropped when you saw his face as he opened the door. His eyes were sunken in, he was very pale. He looked like a shell of his former self.
āBaby, whatās going on?ā you asked as he gestured you in.
He sat down on his bed beside you but didnāt want to speak. He didnāt want to put you in danger.
āPlease talk to me,ā you said, tears welling up in your eyes.
Hot, fat tears started to flow down his cheeks. You pulled him close to you as he sobbed into your chest.
āI donāt know why you want to be with me. Iām worthless,ā he cried, your heart shattering at his words.
āBaby, why do you think that? You arenāt worthless,ā you said, a few tears slipping past your bottom lashes.
āIām nothing. Iām weak. I donāt deserve you,ā he was choking out his words between sobs as your fingers ran through his hair.
āEthan, I love you. I love you with all my heart. I donāt want you to talk about yourself like that. Youāre perfect the way you are,ā you whispered to him as you kissed his forehead.
āNo, Iām not. My dad always compares me to my brother. Heās always been the golden child while Iāve been the black sheep of the family,ā he said, your nails gently dragging across his scalp as you tried to soothe him. Heās never mentioned his family, and it really pissed you off that anyone could make this sweet boy feel this way.
āYouāre always golden to me, baby. You mean so much to me, and it breaks my heart that you feel this way.ā
In that moment, everything clicked in Ethanās head. He knew he didnāt need his dad because he has you. Someone that loves him unconditionally.
āWhat if we just leave?ā he asked, sitting up to look at you.
āWhy do you want to leave?ā you asked, taking his hand in yours.
āIt isnāt safe here. I donāt want anything to happen to you,ā he said, his eyes pleading with yours.
You started to think about it. All classes have been cancelled for the last week. Most of the students have already returned home because of what happened to the guys from the Film Studies class.
āWhere do you want to go?ā you asked, smiling at him.
āI donāt care. I want to get as far away as possible,ā he said, standing up. āIāll grab what Iāll need, and weāll go to your dorm next.ā
You helped him grab the necessities, noticing things you knew heād need that he didnāt seem to care about in his current state. He grabbed stacks of clothes, piling them in his suitcase.
āCan you sit on this for me so I can zip it?ā he asked, as you giggled. You did what he asked as he sighed in relief, ready to get your stuff so you could get the fuck out of the state.
You walked out of the dorm and went around the back of it.
āWait here,ā Ethan said, running over to the dumpster. He pulled the robe, mask, and knife out of his backpack, throwing it away.
He was smiling when he came back over to you, looking like the normal Ethan you fell in love with. He picked you up and spun you around, before kissing you.
āI love you,ā he said, as he sat you back down and his forehead rested against yours.
āI love you, too.ā
Once you arrived at your dorm, you grabbed everything you needed in a matter of minutes. Ethan was deep in thought as he sat on your bed.
āYou having second thoughts about this?ā you joked, as he shook his head.
āNo, thereās nothing more that I want than to get away from here with you,ā he said, placing a kiss to your forehead. āCan we take your car?ā
āI was kind of hoping that was the plan,ā you laughed, as you double-checked the room to make sure you werenāt missing anything. āLetās get out of here.ā
Your hand was in his as you walked through the student parking lot to your car. Once you made it there, Ethan asked you to get in so he could put the luggage in the trunk. You thought about how Chad mentioned that Ethan hadnāt slept in days, so you decided that itād be best if you drove.
He started to feel uneasy, so he felt around under the bumper of your car.
āThat stupid bitch,ā he muttered, pulling off the tracking device Quinn mustāve put on your car.
āOkay, weāre ready. I just need to run by the ATM before we leave,ā he said, as you looked at him, confused.
āUh, my dad has experience with finding people, and I donāt want him to see my card transactions wherever we end up going,ā he explained, as you nodded.
You pulled up to the ATM as he handed you his card and told you the pin.
āHow much?ā you asked, entering the pin on the pad.
āLetās get two thousand for now,ā he said, as you turned to look at him.
āHow much money do you have in here?ā you asked, your eyes wide. Itās not everyday a college kid pulls two grand out of their bank account.
āI have a lot. When my mom died, she left a lot of money to me,ā he said, as you rubbed your hand against his thigh.
āI didnāt know that babe. Iām sorry,ā you said, withdrawing the money and handing it to him.
As the two of you crossed state lines, he finally stopped looking behind him. You felt a little nervous that he was so concerned, almost like he thought you were being followed. The further you drove, the more exhausted you started to get.
āWe might need to stop soon,ā you said, Ethanās tired eyes looking you over.
āOkay, letās take the next exit. We can get a hotel room for the night,ā he said, as you nodded, a yawn slipping out.
Once you got to the room, he crawled onto the bed. You helped him take his shoes off before you snuggled up beside him.
āThank you,ā he said, as he laid his head on your chest.
āFor what?ā you asked, starting to relax in the bed.
āFor loving me as much as you do.ā
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Okay yāallā¦ I was very critical of eps 3 & 4 (especially 4) of NAtLA. Then all of a sudden eps 5 & 6 kinda slapped me in the face with how much better the show suddenly got.
Spoiler-free thoughts first:
Zuko, Iroh, and Aang have cemented themselves as the best parts about this adaptation - which is really funny considering Iām currently writing a longfic AU where Zuko and Iroh discover Aang in the iceberg right after Zuko is banished at age 13 and end up becoming the first members of the Gaang (albeit reluctantly at first lol). Episode 6: āMasksā (the Blue Spirit adaptation) was so good, Iād venture to say that it actually improved and fleshed out some things from the original series.
Episode 5: āSpirited Awayā, while not as good as E6, was not as bad as I heard people say it was going to be. I think that the changes they did make didnāt bother me nearly as much as the changes they made in the last episode, and it was actually entertaining.
There were several scenes that made me cry in both of these episodes (moreso in episode 6, which Iāll get into further down in the spoiler section). These are the scenes that I feel like really tapped into the heart of the original show rather than feeling like a soulless remake.
Now for my in-depth thoughts (INCLUDES SPOILERS):
EP 5: āSpirited Awayā
- Staring out, I was bummed because I had just rewatched the first two eps of the original animated series lol.
- It was an interesting choice to have all three members of the Gaang get stuck in the Spirit World, but I think it worked.
- Wan Shi Tong just showing up randomly was a bit unnecessary, but I suppose it will be kinda interesting to see him again in S2 since heās already met the Gaang
- Hei Bai plays a much smaller role in these eps, but I strangely didnāt mind that either?
- Seeing Kataraās last memory with her mom was devastating, especially the fact that she had to witness her death and hide in the igloo with Kyaās charred body :(( she definitely has severe PTSD.
- Even Sokkaās memory made me tear up a bit
- Koh being the villain and a soul-eater or whatever was a bit of an odd choice, but I guess I can see why they did it. I do prefer him just being an asshole who steals pplās faces lol
- Appreciated the Fog of Lost Souls reference from the LoK lore
- Aang reuniting with Gyatso made me cry. I know some people didnāt like him being in the Spirit World, but I really liked it. Also, the fact that Gyatso was the first person to tell Aang that it wasnāt his fault the Air Nomads died, and that if he had been there he would have died too? THANK YOU! My poor boy has been berated enough for āabandoningā the world.
- We got some interesting lore about the afterlife for humans from Gyatso and Aangās convo, which weāve never gotten in AtLA media before. Idk if itās just for Air Nomads, but Aang mentions that Gyatso stayed behind instead of āseeking enlightenmentā. I know that the end goal in Buddhism is to reincarnate until you eventually achieve nirvana, so I wonder if thatās what they were alluding to (Iām not an expert on religions so pls correct me if Iām wrong)
- Oh yeah, I forgot June is here lmao. As a queer person I loved her (bc beautiful goth woman) but I didnāt like the weird choice to make her hit on Iroh - I guess to contrast the Iroh being creepy towards her thing in the OG series. I wish they would have just had them interact normally tbh, no weird āflirtingā
EP 6: āMasksā
- Here we go yāall. The best episode in the show so far and probably the best the show is gonna get this season. Iām still pretty shocked at how good this one was.
- I think the decision to include flashbacks to Zukoās Agni Kai was a good decision here. It felt like an appropriate episode for them and the flashbacks were very well done.
- In general, Dallas is doing a phenomenal job at portraying a Zuko who is angry and aggressive, yes, but also so very sweet and compassionate at his core. I love when little inklings of his true self shine through.
- Roku wasā¦ not what I expected. He was very much more of a lighthearted and jokey personā¦ I didnāt hate it, it was just unexpected lol. I wonder if they did that to contrast him with Kyoshi. Which, speaking of, Iām glad Roku clarified that Aang doesnāt just need to be a merciless warrior (and that he didnāt berate Aang for āabandoningā the world like she did). But I still am annoyed about the mischaracterization of Kyoshi in general.
- RIP Shyu :/
- Thought it was kind of strange how June captures Aang at Rokuās temple lol. Like how did she get on and off the island??
- Zhao continues to feel like a completely different character to me lmao. I think this version is pretty funny, but itās so weird to see Zhao being portrayed as so goofy and incompetent when he was such an intimidating force and the main villain of Book 1 in the OG series. Just a weird direction they went with his character.
- The Yuyan archers look cool as fuck. 10/10 no notes
- Still not sure how I feel about Azula already being this insecure and jealous of Zuko. I think it makes her feel a bit more realistically like a child, but the whole point of Azulaās character is that she is really good at maintaining this cool and calm persona on the surface, which she uses to scare and manipulate people. I can see her maybe getting to a point later on to where she hardens herself into that though. Weāll see.
- Baby Zuko asking Iroh how he looks and his little smile šššš I had a physical āawwā reaction to that. THATāS MY SON (me and Iroh shouting in unison)
- War Room scene was handled very well. No complaints. I like how Ozai tried to test Zuko with battle strategies.
- Blue Spirit break out scene was extremely close to the original, and it was really good. They adapted it almost shot for shot with all the important parts.
- Hereās probably my favorite part of the episode: Zuko and Aangās talk inside the abandoned house after they escape from Pohuai!!!!!! Gahhhh I could gush about this scene all day. I love how they expanded it to be an actual friendly conversation between Aang and Zuko. Like we get to see Zukoās true self coming through - the sweet, kind boy we know he is. Zuko and Aang just have such great chemistry as well, wayyy more than Aang has with either Sokka or Katara. Like I adored them bonding over painting and caligraphy!!! I think this is the best acting weāve seen from Gordon so far, and Dallas did a phenomenal job switching back to that hurt, angry version of himself (of course a trauma response). And the fact that Aang said āsorry, I didnāt mean to hurt youā when he blocked Zukoās firebending attack??? My sweet boy š
- The final flashback to the Agni Kai was really well done too. Iād already heard Zuko fights back, which I wasnāt sure Iād like, but I actually didnāt mind it. I really liked that they showed Zukoās hesitation whenever he did actually have an opening, and that was what angered Ozai the most - Zuko showing compassion, āweaknessā. Daniel Dae Kim is of course doing a phenomenal job (no surprises there), and I really liked that Iroh actually attempted to stop Ozai at one point. It also looked like young Azula had tears in her eyes, which I again actually liked because it humanizes her.
- I loved that Aang was still there when Zuko woke up on the boat š he wanted to make sure he was okay!! I full on started crying when we got the ādo you think we could have been friends too?ā lines from him. Again, Gordon killed it. I love how you can tell that Aang knows Zuko has been hurt and thatās why he acts the way he does. He doesnāt blame him for any of it. 10/10
- the last flashback to Zuko in his bed recovering from the burnā¦ god the tears just kept flowing. I really liked the choice to have Ozai almost give Zuko a chance to likeā¦ idk understand why he did what he did, and how compassion is āweakā?? And then Zukoās response to give people a chance ššš as if I couldnāt love him any more!!! And then of course Ozai gets pissed. But seeing baby Zuko just cry in his bed UGH Iām dehydrated at this point
- Of course I canāt finish this review without mentioning the 41st division. What an incredible way to expand upon the source material by making them Zukoās crew!!! It shows just how much Zuko truly cares about others and it moved me so much (once again to tears).
I donāt have high hopes for the last two episodes, but honestly, if this is what the live action can be, it gives me a bit of hope (at least for future seasons). I really think that Dallas, Gordon, Paul, and Daniel were the stars of this ep and are a big part of what made it so good.
#atla#natla#netflix atla spoilers#natla spoilers#atla live action#avatar the last airbender netflix#avatar the last airbender#atla netflix#atla meta#natla meta#zuko#aang#iroh#ozai#zukaang
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chapter 146 thoughts
This chapter (and thus this chapter review) contains discussion of abuse, suicidal ideation and CSA, so if you're not in the headspace for that, skip this one and I'll see you next time.
we are so oshi no back
After last chapter left me fighting for my life to come up with literally anything to say about it, this was one of those chapters where I ended up having more and more to say about it the more I turned it over in my head. It still feels a bit disjointed and has that same issue of ripping through the events of the movie way too fucking fast that the arc as a whole has been having lately but this chapter was such a breath of fresh air I can't bring myself to care.
The chapter itself is more or less split in two, with one half dedicated to 15 Year Lie's in-universe events and the other focusing a bit on Aqua and Kana for, tbh, the first time in way too long. Admittedly, my enthusiasm for 15YL has waned given the reveal of just how much of it is completely made up but like. I'm still gonna over analyze this stuff. Sunk cost fallacy, don't fail me now!!!!
I joke, but the 15YL section of this chapter was legitimately bone chilling. That barrage of cuts following Uehara's attack on Airiā¦. fuuuuuuuck, man.
Airi herself is pure fucking poison this chapter too and I mean it in the best way. I continue to be incredibly impressed with how OnK understands the motivations of a person like Airi what her abuse of Hikaru is really about. When discussing this in 141, Miyako points out just how often victims of abuse can themselves go on to perpetuate their own pain out of a need to try and regain their dignity, but I think what Airi seeks in her abuse of Hikaru is control. We see how often she wields her power over him while pretending that he has as much agency as she does in their """relationship""" and it's repeated here, too; she throws the results of her own sexual abuse of him in his face as a way of permanently chaining the two of them together, all while tearing down his worth as a person as if to 'prove' he deserves to be trapped in her grasp. I've said before that Akasaka is unsettlingly good at writing toxic mothers but I think Airi has made it pretty clear that Akasaka understands and is thus excellent at writing abuse and abusers in general, and for someone like me who counts that as one of their favourite Themes (tm) in fiction, I feel quite well fed.
The abuse Airi hurls at him is also interesting from a perspective of paralleling Hikaru even further with Ai. We saw snippets of this in 140, of Hikaru characterizing himself as someone desperately trying to construct a version of himself that can be loved by others the same way Ai creates 'Ai of B-Komachi', a version of herself who can give and receive love in the way she thinks her authentic self is unable to. Airi puts this into more explicit words; Hikaru must construct this fake version of himself because there is no 'real' him and thus, he is inherently unlovable. Jesus Christ.
Knowing those words were swimming around in his head, it makes the HKAI scene that follows even more of a gutpunch than it already is. It's the most wonderful kind of miscommunication tragedy - with their respective traumas, there is basically no other way a talk like that could have gone and yet it's agonizing to see it play out. Ai's innocent cruelty in the face of Hikaru's pain and her suffocating smileā¦ the worst part is, while I completely understand why this was so shattering for Hikaru, it's impossible to miss that this was, in a way, an expression of love from Ai; it was honesty, an admission of vulnerability. She herself even says she doesn't want to lie to him. But to Hikaru, what else could that have sounded like but a confirmation of his most godawful fear?
that said. the timeline here is very confusing. this seems to imply hkai were still dating all the way up to the murder-suicide, which seemed to be just before the dome concert but did the breakup really seem that recent during their phone call?? this whole timeline is penised beyond repair.
The art in this chapter in general is incredibly good but something in particular I want to highlight is how much and how often Aqua-as-Hikaru looks like Ai in these panels. I can't put my finger on what it is, but that similarity always makes me feel so warm and sad whenever I see it. For as much as he struggles with his relationship to her, Aqua really is his mother's son through and through.
and. man. what even is there to say about that scene in the rain and everything that follows. I was't sure if the murder/suicide was going to be featured in the movie but even the brief snippet of it that we got and that barrage of scene titles and Kamiki's silent screamā¦ whoof. shit like this makes me really hope we get to see mengo illustrate a horror manga someday because i think she would absolutely kill it.
We cut back to reality to see Aqua reading the script and in perhaps the most interesting swerve in this chapter, we see that he has once again reverted to his double black hoshigans. And uh, am I going to sound like a terrible person if I say I'm really glad for this? LOL.
Obviously I would rather Aqua not be experiencing Suicidal Ideation (Bass Boosted) 24/7, but it's kind of a relief to see that one single conversation wasn't enough to totally shake Aqua out of that headspace. I've talked a lot about how frustrating I find it that 'Ruby finds out Aqua is Gorou' is treated as the finale to her black hoshigan arc and every ongoing thread, internal and external, attached to it was dropped like a rock with no further interrogation. It robbed Ruby of the opportunity for some really important growth and, imo, was just shitty for Kana and Memcho who were treated extremely poorly by her and got no apology for it. I was really worried this would be the case for Aqua as well and that his own dip into that rancid headspace would end on a wet fart which would really sting given just how little insight we've gotten into him this arc. But this chapter makes it clear that while some cracks have started to form in his armor, he's not in the clear just yet.
i mean, even if he was permanently back to one white star, aqua is such a little freak regardlessā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦.
What this means in the long term is a little hard to pin down, both because we've had so little insight into Aqua's headspace this arc and because the exact nature of black hoshigan as a symbol has always been a little Calvinballed, but in this context and for Aqua specifically, I think we can read this as his conviction in the messy endgame of his revenge play being shaken up. I, personally, have been reading the black hoshigan as of late as an expression of the sort of futureless despair that can become suicidal ideation, at least for Aqua; since immediately after Ai's death, we have gotten incredibly strong hints that Aqua is suicidal, his guilt-fueled desire to die and his desperate want to experience a happy future at war within him. He more or less explicitly says as such in 106, expressing that this break in their relationship is necessary for Ruby to be able to live on 'after he's gone' - which strongly implies that Aqua's revenge play is intended to end with his death.
Knowing that Ruby is Sarina wasn't quite enough to shake his conviction, but their talk in 143 was. I do think Ruby just giving him some straightforward affirmation was a good starting point but I also can't help but wonder, with the context that his white stars were not indicative of a permanent change, if hearing just how deeply Ruby still relies on 'Gorou's' presence in her life struck a nerve for him. Paraphrasing her from 143, she straight up says Gorou is the one who gives her life meaning. And if that's how it is, what exactly will happen if he's gone again..?
Obviously this is all still speculation because even when I am begging on hand and knee Akasaka is refusing to give us Aqua introspection but at this point I have to make a guess at SOMETHING if i am going to say anything remotely coherent about aqua in this arc, so
ANYWAY!! AQUA AND KANA HAVING A NORMAL ASS CONVERSATION FOR THE FIRST TIME IN GOD KNOWS HOW LONG!!! Ngl, it did give me a bit of a chuckle to see Kana voice the question of whether Aqua was getting too immersed in his role, given that people were accusing her of that back during the first round of the RBKN conflict.
I was also really surprised to see Aqua just outright say that yeah, he is at least flirting with suicidal ideation. Like - that's the first time he's said that out loud, to anybody??? In 143 he voices the less damning but still not great sentiment that he feels guilty for being alive but this is to my knowledge the first time Aqua has expressed his suicidal ideation out loud, let alone to anyone else. Andā¦ fuck, man! That's an absolutely terrifying thing to hear a friend say. No wonder Kana reacts like she does.
Because of my powers of Claire-voyance (read: basic pattern recognition and being in fandoms for 15+ years), I'm pretty sure people are going to be Very Mean to Kana about the way she chooses to respond to Aqua here but honestly? Not only did this tough love response feel very IC for her, but the clumsiness of it felt very honest to me. I think a lot of people in fandom lately just want characters to talk like fucking therapists all the time and have the Correct And Unproblematic Response toā¦ well, situations like this. But Kana is an 18 year old girl who has her own share of issues and her friend she knows is dealing with his own huge amount of baggage just casually dropped an "i wanna kms" on her. All things considered, I think she handles it surprisingly well.
Because likeā¦ look at what Kana really says to Aqua here. She gives him some of their usual banter to diffuse the tension but then makes herself very clear: she does not want Aqua to hurt himself and makes him promise that he won't. It's clumsy and rough in the way Kana often is, but I think the important part - her sincere care for Aqua as her friend - really does shine through.
also cute that other people caught: Kana squishing Aqua's face seems to be an intentional callback to one of their on-stage interactions in Tokyo Blade, right down to Aqua making a identical scrunchyface to Kana. Extremely cute. I love it when Aqua is cute <3
Kana also being a person able to shake Aqua out of his black hoshigans also leans into something I've been hoping is going to pay off for a while now; the idea that Aqua's salvation is not going to come from any one, singular character but from the many different people who Aqua has built relationships with coming together when he needs them to support him. One of the things OnK has continually highlighted is the way isolation and lacking support systems warp and damage people's mental health and I think it would play excellently into that theme to have Aqua's support net, so to speak, to be wide enough to catch him no matter where he falls.
the product placement was very stupid but i did laugh pretty hard at it and then immediately go buy myself some potato chips so i guess it worked. genius mangaka aka akasaka.
All jokes aside, the note their talk ended off on was so lovely too. Aqua being honest enough to admit that being with Kana is fun and Kana getting all dokidoki and then quietly admitting she feels the same when she's aloneā¦ cute! But more than that, it highlights something about the AQKN dynamic I think is really important, regardless of whether their relationship is romantic, platonic, in laws, mlm/wlw hostility or whatever else; Kana is his friend and he can just be a normal boy and have normal fun with her without any ulterior motives. It's something Aqua doesn't really have in any of his other relationships so getting a reminder of that and what it means to Aqua was really good.
honestly i think i am just so starved of nice things happening to my son that seeing him opening up to one of his friends and admitting he has fun (HIS LAUGH!!!!!!) was like a shot of heavenly ambrosia for me. please can hoshino aqua have just one nice day.
OR UHā¦ BASED ON THAT LAST PAGEā¦. PROBABLY NOT ANYTIME SOONā¦.!!!
this is what i mean about this chapter giving me 5000000 things to talk about. kamiki is TALKING TO RUBY IN THE FLESH FOR THE FIRST TIME and i almost completely forgor.
why is he dressed like a dad about to take her out on a fishing trip, though
Ruby looks unusually solemn while she's praying, which is interesting. She's been pretty bright and high energy since 141ish so I'm curious what has her looking so comparatively dour. She's praying at a shrine, too, which means there's probably something on her mind. Nik (@akane-kurokawa) theorized that she's anxious about the upcoming scenes in the movie (LIKE, YOU KNOW, HER MOM'S DEATH) and until we get further insight on that, that's what I'm gonna assume too.
putting aside how Shrimptresting it is that Kamiki turned up out of nowhere like that, I can't help but note a certain horrible parallel between Uehara meeting young Hikaru in the rain with a black umbrella and Kamiki doing the same for his daughterā¦
cannot wait for that entire talk to get offscreened. lol.
break next weekā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦ā¦
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The Newsreader - 2x06
You know I was thinking of the way the last season ended.
These whole sequence is quite upsetting, at least for me, although I utterly enjoyed season 2 and ofc, its ending as well, which made me very excited for what is coming next. Grab something to drink, to eat because this is going to be a long one.Ā
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First, just for some context.
2x06.
Weāre back to a full circle moment, with Helen asking Dale to marry her as she cannot function without him, as she is willing to bear his secret and this time Dale is refusing. He doesnāt forget to tell he loves her but they canāt do that. Helen expresses then how she does not know what to do but Dale tells her something, he tells her that she just needs to do her job.Ā
Cut to Donna Gillies, the very noisy interviewer in Helenās home with Dale and something happens, something that made chills run down my spine. Dale is doing his job, heās doing something I did not expect him to do or rather felt very overwhelmed seeing him do. Dale is doing something that would help him keep his job, for a very long time. Iāll develop more later but we can see him expose to Donna that Helen left, that Geoff is stepping off, that all of his opponents are gone and he is now the only milking cow available, the only one left and how if she remains quiet regarding Daleās sexuality, regarding Tim, she could have not only one big editorial, one selling story but multiples and throughout long years, even for the rest of Donnaās life because a great newsreader is forever. He is offering her everything she wants, a long thread of years full of exclusive coverage of the future events of his life.Ā
We can reason that Donna accepted the proposition because we suddenly see Helen at the airport. We can hear Dale's voice and then we see her looking at Dale through TV and the tears flood her eyes. She wants to cry as she watches him deliver the news on TV to the entire nation. I read her looks as very mixed emotions bumping into e/o. Sheās sad. Helen is proud too. She is devastated because she knows the loneliness of it, the chaos behind and the devotion. Sheās happy because Dale is where he wants to be. She is stunned as well because he is just really good. Heās THE newsreader.Ā Ā
We can see him say : Iām Dale Jennings. Welcome to News at Six and then it cuts. I made a music analysis of this as I think it is a genius sequence.
Ā
Now that the context is established, I really want to get into details and share some of my interpretation and understanding of that ending + some of what I expect for the coming episodes, especially what might be coming in terms of personal affairs for Dale as we know this is the finale season of the series.Ā
When it comes to his personal life, I am a bit blank and lost but also, I cannot seem to dissociate it from his professional life as well. Will he be with Helen at the end? Will he be with Tim? Tbh, I donāt think Dale is going to end the series with either one of them. I donāt see the story heading there at all and I am not saying Dale does not deserve love. Itās quite the opposite actually. He deserves every ounce of love like anyone else but the thing is Dale does not love himself and Iām not necessarily a āyou have to love yourself to be lovedā thruther but in this case, I think it goes even beyond that. In fact, I do not think who he ends up with matters that much, I donāt think his relationship with Helen is just that, meaning a romantic relationship or the one he has with Tim, just a fling, a gut wrenching crush.
I think both relationships go beyond that and mean much more than what they outwardly portray and imho, lie in there the entirety of the story, or most of it at least.Ā
Dale despises such a big part of who he is that it eats him alive from within, that it doesn't allow him to thrive, to live, to breathe. He hates himself for it, for these feelings he thought would disappear, for this way of loving that does not seem to fit anywhere, for however hard he tries, it never seems to be enough, it is always not normal. Dales hates it. He really does and I think that is why, deep down, he runs after a certain form of recognition, through TV, through the entire nation of Australia, through his colleagues at the News office, through his mom, through Helen.
I mean we are speaking of the man that took speech classes for his voice because it wasnāt good enough for the rest of the world, of the man that instantly changed his hairstyle the moment Helen tells him he looks better like that, more appropriate for TV. These events seem quite futile and silly almost but imho, they hold greater meanings and enlighten in a horrendous beam the deep and profound trauma and ache, the dreadful desire to please and be accepted, loved and respected. He runs after reassurance from Helen and finds it for a while. Dale also runs after a horrible sense of normality, of something common and ordinary and finds it again until it all crumbles down because he is not normal, because he does not fit anywhere, because he is broken. Just to be clear, Dale loves Helen, I never doubted that. I think he truly does but I believe he loves the idea of what she represents too, the safety she embodies if she is affiliated to him in society, in the 80s, as a public figure. He loves her for the confident newsreader in her, for how she manages to maintain the persona, how she holds it in despite being on the verge of tumbling down. Dale loves her as she, deep down, cares for him, loves him unconditionally (not necessarily romantically but as human to human, as a person to another one) and that regardless of the fights and despite the refusals. He knows they love each other and this is precisely why Dale does what he does.Ā
At the end of the season, I almost saw a bit of early-day Helen in him. He grew cold, he maintained that perfect facade for the press, for the world. Just like he promised it to Donna, to himself in a way and it reminded me of when they were shooting their supposedly lovely candid shots in their home and Dale was not comfortable as everything was too much and planned and fake and Helen told him that this is how it was supposed to be, that they had to reflect to the public that perfect picture because they were the newsreaders, the perfect ever lasting couple.Ā
Dale accepts and fall into that at the end. He has a goal, the desk and does anything to get to it, is willing to hide himself even deeper in the trenches to match that polished version of himself.Ā
The newsreader. The perfect face, the one you trust to deliver news to the world, forever.Ā
That, again, genuinely made chills run down my spine because, first of all it echoes the ending of season 1 where we can see a happy Dale and Helen on the desk, with Tim in the back, smiling at the vision of it because Dale finally did it. But also bcs as we got a full circle moment with the proposal, I felt like we had a full circle moment with that too and it broke my heart as I know the desk has always been a dream of his, as far as his childhood but at what cost.Ā
This is what season 3 will develop imo, or at least I hope so. It is going to be sad for sure and I know he is going to be hated, I know he is going to crumble down at some point and I expect Tim to reappear too and threatens that fake stability Dale seems to engulf himself within. I know theyāre going to be opponents with Helen and I wonder how he will manage that too, the tension of it all. I expect him to be even more cold and hard, to lose himself furthermore up to the point he snaps and because I hope for a happy ending, I want to see Dale find himself again and love himself for it. I want to see the newsreader if it still is what he wants to do, although I can see him doing documentaries or on site live newsflashes.Ā
Essentially, I hope to see Dale realise that he can be forever, that he can be the face that can be trusted, that he is the face all while accepting himself, all while being at peace with who he truly is. I see him having a lovely relationship with Helen and not necessarily romantic. I think their souls are linked in ways that are hard to explain and I wish to see them as good friends, colleagues or at least as a joyful warm memory in e/oās life.Ā I hope he makes things right with Tim too.
Either way, it is going to be sad, hard to watch but I just know they will deliver.
Anyway, I am going to end this here before it gets too long. If you read all of this, thank you very much and please do not hesitate to hop into the conversation ^v^
#the newsreader#dale jennings#sam reid#helen norville#anna torv#tim ahern#chai hansen#helendale#dale x tim#very long brain vomit of what i expect for season 3 bcs obv im very excited for the finale!#shĆ¢m's the newsreader talk#the newsreader meta
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promises are meant to be broken, hearts are meant to be kept (i.n x reader)
genre: angst
warnings: slight mention of gaining a few pounds
sorry for the inactivity! i was really busy with irl stuff. plus, i've been applying in so much coffee shops just to get a part-time job, i can't even count how many anymore tbh
anyway, here's an i.n x reader to make up for the lost time.
pt. 2
"Do you even care about me?"
Your voice was like thin air. Entering his left ear and then slipping out through the other. You and Jeong In had been arguing for the past 20 minutes. About what? About him missing a date. Honestly, why were you even surprised? If not most of the time, he would sometimes forget that you two had something planned for the day. You would always get texts from him, saying he'd be out with the boys or just doing something, oblivious to the fact that he had kept you waiting for almost an hour or more at that fancy restaurant you two have been checking out the week prior.
It was getting tiring. And to top it all off, he even said he'd make it up to you so he promised to take you out to dinner tonight. Heck, you even put on that pretty dress you bought from last month, squeezing yourself in it, realizing that you've gained quite a few pounds after dejectingly looking at the mirror but managed to not look weird anywayāonly for him to arrive home three hours later; sleepy, tired, irritated.
Well if he was tired, you were exhausted. If he was irritated, you were angry. It was the worst combination. Your anger wasn't the best sight for Jeong In right now, and Jeong In just shrugging off your concern as if it wasn't as big deal wasn't exactly the best response either.
So you stood there, hands on your waist as you gave him an expression of disbelief. He was rubbing his face with his palms, a tad bit closer to raising his voice at you but chose to exasperatedly sigh instead.
You let out a scoff, "Really, Jeong In?"
"What?" you could swear there was a hint of snap from his voice.
"I can't believe that out of us both, you had the right to sigh. Who's the one who keeps on getting stood out again?" you rolled your eyes at him, your eyebrows furrowing all throughout your whole sentence. It was now his turn to look at you in disbelief.
"Y/N please. I just got home from work and I'm really tired and stressed... It's not my fault that my boss made me stay for some over time," he defended. "It's not like I could say no anyway."
It irked you. You loved Jeong In so much you would move heaven and Earth for him, but God, it felt like his mere presence irritated you so much right now. His voice, his audacity, his reasoning.
It took you a bit of time clenching your knuckles, fighting the urge to just break down into tears and cry in front of him. "You're failing to see the point here, Jeong In! It's not just about today! You keep on making promises you can't keep. And you apologize, over and over and over and over again, it's so tiring!"
"Well, you'd rather I tell my boss no just so I could show up and possibly lose my job?"
At this point, his voice was starting to raise, making you flinch a bit. "You're being overly dramatic and selfish right now, Y/N."
That was it. That was the last straw.
You just stood there, silently as you bore your eyes into him. When you said nothing back, Jeong In realized he went too far. You tried to blink the tears away and you inhaled, your breath shaking as you exhaled. The look of disappointment you gave him made his heart clench.
He was stressed, you were stressed. Words have been thrown without any much though. And now, both of you have hurt each other.
"...I'm leaving," you whisper under your breath, hoping it came out as quiet as you wanted it to so Jeong In would barely hear. But he did hear it, and it broke his heart hearing you say those two words. Both of you knew this was something that you were saying out of emotion but he didn't want to risk the chances of you actually walking out the door and never returning again.
Jeong In stood from the bed, making his way to you. He tried to reach out for your hand but you avoided his touch. "Y/N, please..."
You could sense the immediate regret and guilt at his voice and it made you hurt more. But right now, it was too much. You turned your head away from him. You didn't want to look at him in the face. Because if you did, you know you'd throw out all reason aside and just give in and forget all the pain the both of you have caused each other. You loved Jeong In that much.
But you also hoped that Jeong In loved you as much too.
So you sighed and walked out the door, leaving Jeong In standing there, wanting nothing more than to take back his words as he was now left along with his thoughts. He was wrong, he was the one being selfish. And now, he couldn't even chase you out through the door because fatigue started to take over his body.
He didn't want to be tired. Of work, of everything. Of you. Especially you.
tag form will be up soon! like and reblog if you like it~
#skz#stray kids#skz fanfic#skz imagines#skz x reader#stray kids fanfic#stray kids imagines#stray kids x reader#yang jeongin#skz angst#stray kids angst#i.n skz#i.n stray kids#i.n#i.n x reader#i.n angst#yang jeongin x reader#yang jeongin imagines
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Nier Automata anime Episode 21 disjointed thoughts:
Spoilers, obviously
It had a few good moments but overall I was disappointed in this episode, more so than the last 2. I've been enjoying the anime, especially early s2 immensely but it's gone downhill so fast. It's extra annoying because most of the issues I have could have been fixed/avoided really easily.
The good bits:
THEY THANKED DEVOLA AND POPOLA! After all that time they finally thanked them! (Though I wish they had more small moments of them being dicks to them in past episodes).
FUCK YEAH JACKASS running the truck right into the room!
YEAH THE TWINS KICKED ASS TOO!
OH NO THEY KILLED JACKASS BUT that's probably how she wanted to go tbh
I do think the anime handled the whole fear thing being the machine children's downfall better than the game since they actually did some lead-up instead of Pascal dropping the info after they all died. So that's another good thing. Buuuut...
The not-so-good bits:
I knew immediately A2's idea to send the kids to the resistance camp was a stupidly terrible idea. Idk why they didn't try finding somewhere else to hide them but I expected them to simply lead hostile machines there rather than infect the camp with a ZOMBIE virus. Really? Zombies? Shambling groaning zombies? The whole reason logic viruses are so scary was how strong they make androids and how they'll just attack everything until they fall apart.
I get the narrative reasoning that Lily offering to shelter them ended up being everyone's downfall, but I ended up being more annoyed because of how dumb it was that A2 sent them there. Seems like an easy fix too, Lily could have called in end of last episode after the camp heard the explosions and offered to shelter them herself, then Pascal could have worried about leading enemies to them and Lily assured him they could handle it.
(me) ^
9S has basically no screen time anymore; we can't really feel his descent as well as we did in game. For the most part things are just happening to him rather than him actively doing things. Like, instead of dumping the 2E reveal in the first S2 episode they could have slowly fed it to us over the course of these episodes. They could have made it more fucked up by having the machine network torment 9S with bits of 2E hints or had the damage to his body scramble his mind in a way that he remembers flashes of his past lives/deaths. I think the game's definitely handled showing his mental decline in isolation while still being a sympathetic character better than the anime is doing.
(cymbal ism)
I sort of like how they put the flight unit in the god box and forced 9S to see it but I feel it would have been more impactful if they had a moment where he almost found it in the flooded city but passed it up because he was distracted and didn't realize it was 2B's unit. And oh look he passed out again.
No lunar tears no 2B memorial? Give him a chance to breathe and have some sort of positive or bittersweet interaction. In the game he still interacted with other androids and helped them but the only interaction we got in the anime was him slapping a flower from that one memorial quest guy's hand.
Pascal's 180 is still ehhh for me. The whole thing that made the Goliath fight in game so impactful was he was holding onto his pacifism till the very end until he had no other option. But in the anime he went berserk the moment there was even the possibility of danger. They didn't even know the hostile machines were a threat to the village when the pods told them. They had time to evacuate and it would have been a lot more fucked up (in a good way) if they were followed and picked off and then pascal went berserk when it was only the children left.
One child killed all the others in fear instead of it being a whole group fear effort. And then he bit pascal with a zombie virus? Pascal blew up when A2 wasn't even there??? And she barely even reacted when his arm shrapnel almost hit her. I get that they have to deal with the lack of player input choosing what to do but that could have easily been fixed with a scene cut right before A2 makes a choice.
They could have written it so it showed signs of them all trying to escape but were unable to. Maybe had one of them still alive because they failed to hit their core and explained what happened or had some sort of other visual hints as to what happened. maybe frantic carving on the walls or something idk.
But then again, patient 0 being the one 9S was extra suspicious about and almost hacked back in episode 5 is pretty interesting. Shows he was technically right all along about them being a threat, but for the wrong reasons. Still they probably could have merged the two ideas together to work better. I'd like to know if the machine network infected them on purpose or if it was their own fear that caused them to snap. If the latter then they could have also had the infected resistance react differently than being stereotypical zombies. They could have picked up on the fear and all went hysterical fighting and shooting each other because the virus overwhelmed them with fear and they were trying to put themselves and each other 'out of their misery'.
But then again again I don't really like how they made the disabled one the one that went crazy and ate everyone. Idk, they could have handled it better.
The whole resistance dying is definitely sadder than in game. They both work in their own ways so I can't really say one is better than the other. It hurt but I didn't hate it. I want to see what they have planned for killing everyone in this version before I make my final judgment.
I do hope they have a scene where 9S finds the village and feels bad because that was a nice bit in game to show he still cared about them despite going on his rampage with the other machines.
I really hope the tower episodes are good, I can forgive this fumbling if the next few episodes are bangers.
#nier#nier automata#nier anime#nier spoilers#nier automata spoilers#nier anime spoilers#my shitposts
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Footy RPF Fictober, day 6 - Different sport AU
also available on ao3
shoutout to the carraville server for brainstorming what sports they could do in this one........... im literally no thoughts head empty just imagining gary in a gymnast's outfit. tbh.
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Something that nobody tells you about the Olympics is how boring it is. You spend four years training for what ultimately comes down to a couple of daysā worth of events.
Jamie does alright for himself in national competitions ā more than just alright actually, alright doesnāt get you picked for team GB ā and heās had his fair share of European medals. Even at the international level, heās lost track of how many times heās made the finals at the World Athletics Championships (maybe itās not polite to brag. But who cares ā heās worked hard to get where heās got, heās allowed to toot his own horn a little).
The Olympics, thoughā¦ theyāre a different beast. Itās his second go-around and if youāre just going off of placement then technically itās been worse than the first. Heād not made it out of the heats for the steeplechase and heād come dead last in his semi final for hurdles. But heād got new PBs for both, so itās not been a complete waste of time.
It does mean that heās been stuck loitering around the Olympic village with nothing to do while he waits for the closing ceremony to come around. He works his way through the books heād brought along with him, he gets to know all the other sorry bastards who are in the same situation as him, and he goes to watch whatever random events the Team GB people can get him tickets for.
Thatās the one highlight of it, really. Usually Jamieās so locked in to the world of athletics that he forgets other sports actually exist, that thereās people who actually earn a living off of, like, boats. Or beating other people up.
Or, as it would turn out, gymnastics. The first time Jamie shows up to watch it heās expecting to see a load of young girls jumping around in sparkly leotards ā not really his thing, but he can appreciate it from an athletic point of view. Instead, though, heās met with a lot of very muscular men performing routines that he canāt tear his eyes away from.
The British team earn themselves bronze medals, too, and itās far enough removed from Jamieās own sport that he can skip feeling jealous and just be impressed. So he asks if he can get tickets for the next day. And the next.
Thereās this one guy on the team. He must be around Jamieās age, maybe a couple of years older, and Jamieās pretty sure heās not smiled once the entire games. Heās tall for a gymnast, though really not that tall at all, and his legs. Jesus fuck, those legs. His arms, too, and his chest ā just every bit of him, actually.
Heās in the next event ā individual all-round ā and he doesnāt place. But then at the next one he bags himself a silver for the rings, and he just misses third for the vault (Jamieās only just learnt the scoring system for this sport but heās certain he was robbed). And then heās not in the next event, and when Jamie leans over to ask another team GB spectator where he is they look at him like heās stupid and tell him āheās already done all his disciplinesā.
So he politely waits for the British lad to be done with his bit (gotta support the side, even if itās not the British lad heād been hoping to see), then he high-tails it out of there and goes back to mope around the village.
Neville, heās learnt by now. Gary Neville. Heās been asking around the team GB lot to find out what people know about him (the usual stuff ā name, what part of the village heās staying in, does he like men, how old is he, please for the love of god tell me he likes men, that sort of thing), and itās not a lot. He sounds like a bit of an anti-social prick actually, so focused on his sport that he doesnāt have much time for other people.
Sporty family, apparently. His brother plays football for Manchester United (Jamie makes a mental note to avoid football talk when they eventually get to speak), and his sister plays netball for England. Gary is somehow (especially considering that Jamieās just watched him snag two Olympic medals) the least successful of the three.
Thereās a bunch of fast food places in the Olympic village ā kind of stupid, considering what professional athletes usually eat, but also kind of genius considering the amount of people whoāll be in need of comfort food. Itās in one of these that Jamie manages to accidentally-on-purpose run into him.
āItās Gary, right?ā he says to introduce himself, all casual-like. āSurprised our pathsāve never crossed before. Iām Jamie, but most people just call me Carra. Athletics.ā
Gary squints at him, frowning. Thereās a little line at the centre of his brow that Jamie hadnāt noticed when heād been watching him from the stands. āRight,ā he says slowly, like heās not quite sure why Jamieās talking to him. āHi. Were you waitinā to order, orā¦?ā
āNah, not too big on Chinese. Just ā was walkinā by and I saw you, thought Iād congratulate you on the medals.ā
āOh! Thanks, yeah, obviously Iām really proud, and pleased for my whole team too I sāposeā¦ erm, Iāve not had much time to watch the athletics, that all go alright?ā
Jamie shrugs. āAs expected.ā
āRight. Well, nice to haveāā
Gary takes a step as if to leave. Jamie takes a step too, so that he canāt. āDidnāt fancy going back up there today to cheer your mates on?ā
His face scrunches up with displeasure as if Jamieās just suggested he walk over hot coals. āItās my rest day,ā he says, like thatās reason enough not to go.
To be honest, Jamie canāt really judge. Heās been avoiding the other track events too.
āDāyou want some company?ā
āYou what?ā
āWith yer resting.ā Jamie looks around the village, gestures vaguely at the other athletes milling about like we both know theyāre all doing it too. Then, in case the problem was less the principle of the thing and more that Jamie hadn't made himself clear enough, he adds, āin your room. Would you like to rest, with me, in your room. Or mine, Iām not fussy.ā
Gary blinks. āAre you cominā on to me?ā
āJesus Christ, what else would I be doinā? Iām fit, youāre fit ā in both senses of the word āā with that, Jamie adds a wink. It may be over the top, it may be sort of cringe-worthy, but heās never had any complaints about that sort of thing before. Someone even once called him cute for it. āWhy not give it a go? If itās shite then you wonāt have to see me for the next four years anyway.ā
āYouāre a real charmer, arenāt you?ā Gary shakes his head, then looks him over consideringly. Jamie feels a bit awkward under his analytical gaze; he puffs his chest out a bit, tries to stand a little taller.
Then, Gary shrugs. āYeah, alright then. But if you break one of these fuckinā ā flimsy little beds, youāre paying for the damage. Deal?ā
#kinda obsessed w this au ngl. if i had more energy i'd write a longer one. maybe w some smut. tbh.#carraville#footyrpffictober#drabbles
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