#the horns are so unique and i just love the color scheme so much

[smuclge]

Iziador, The Most Cursed Man Alive🩸😱✨️

My second artfight attack of the year! This one's a custom plushie for @strixhaven of his gorgeous bloodhunter, Izzy 🩵

[skyenish]

Twst mlp AU | thoughts behind the designs

I made Leona an earth pony with a thicker build. Hes a square with sharp angles! Hes one of the first drawings I made for this ‘series’ so its a bit lackluster, but I wanted him to be nice and hairy. I gave him a more lion-like tail, and some jewelry from his culture. His ears are nicked and he has long, slightly tangled hair. He also has a lot of hair around his neck becuase he’s a lion! I gave him a color scheme vaguely resembling a lion as well. Also nice and hairy legs, i love to draw those on horses. His cutie mark is three claw marks over clouds of dust. There are multiple different meanings to this cutie mark.

Vil covers up his cutie mark for personal reasons, but its a spotlight shining behidn some curtains. I tried to give him a more ‘feminine’ look while also keeping sharper angles. I love his color scheme, and i made him a unicorn because I thought it fit perfectly. I considered making him an earth pony to really show how he works hard for everything and doesn’t take shortcuts, but in the end unicorn won. I might change it later though! I had to give him some elegant white spots too, because aesthetically it just clicked in my head. He has a purple bow and has his unique hair accessory in his bun. I gave him longer eyelashes, and instead of making his hair a blonde-purple gradient I made some locks purple.

Jamil!!! He’s one of my favorite designs. I know the obvious choice seems to make him a unicorn, but HEAR ME OUT ON PEGASUS JAMIL! It adds a lot of symbolism and extra layers I think, it’s very tragic. Plus, he looks pretty with wings. I gave him darker and greyer colors to portray his darker and jaded nature, and it’s a nice contrast to Kalim’s design. I tried to vaguely design him off of Arabian horses but it didn’t come through very well. Did you know that MLP has a race of horses called ‘Saddle Arabians’? I didnt and i think its absolutely hilarious. Jamil is also supposed to have bags attached to the thing around his waist, but I’m too lazy to draw them.. His cutie mark is an eye with the world as its pupil, and a snake curling behind it. I put a lot of thought into his cutie mark and I’m really happy with what I came up with! To me it has 4 different meanings! I kinda want to redraw Jamil because he looks so small compared to the others!

Kalim is a unicorn for even more delicious angst. His whole family is unicorns. He’d much rather be a pegasus, but at least he has the magic carpet! Jamil thinks it’s bullshit that Kalim can use magic AND can fly. I made Kalim’s colors more vibrant and yellow and lively. He wears lots of jewlery, has tattoos and is my favorite design of these four! He also took me the longest. His cutiemark is a sun or a coin with gems on it, and it has wings. This too has multiple meanings. I think in the Scalding Sands culture the snake jewelry was something the sorcerer of the sands, an alicorn, wore around his horn. Maybe the original was a magical artifact? Well, Kalim, and other people from the scalding sands, wear fakes to honor the sorcerer. Anyways, I made Kalim slightly hairier then Jamil to show how he’s softer and wilder.

———

I’d love to do more with this AU, because my mind is already full with so many cool ideas! Thanks for reading my rambles and have a nice day :)

[entering--hyperspace]

Tribune Echowatcher (Ls1)

My design musings below

Literally only doing this bc I love Leo soooo so so so so so so much. I also in general just love character design So!

1st. I Know I wanted to push the limits of what Charr Look like, I know theyre big ""cats"" but whenever I design ocs I like to push boundaries and play with what aesthetic restrictions exist.

Hyenas came to me (i think, it was 6 years ago when I originally made him so my memory is foggy) because I saw Hyenas around Ascalon and thought, what a fun concept to play with.

I knew I really wanted the very clear shape of hyena ears to stay while also keeping the charr 2 ears, my only choice was to kind of shift the horn placement around. You can see that his ears cover half of the horns, and that theyre a further back on his head in general asba result. I really didnt want to limit myself with the shape of charr ears bc even though I love them, having a character with very clear rounded Hyena ears was too charming of a concept for me to drop.

2. I inverted the colors of a Hyena! Hyena cubs are actually born with black fur and then get a lighter shade as they grow as with many animals, but I thought it would just be a fun way to play with a more unique color scheme, a primary black/gray fur with orange highlights than simply keeping a more realistic and usual color pallet.

3. Spotted Hyenas have some shaggy fur! Its so cute! Its thinner around the neck which I thought was another key feature of the animal that I wanted to translate onto Leo.

4. His armor is definitely not what I consider to be super unique, I needed a ls1-HoT quick armor to draw him in, so I just threw shapes together. I did however want to keep his color coded: Green. Originally I was trying to find some huge complimentary color to add to his outfit but realized that the orange of his mane and spots was already complimentary enough that adding a different color or more to his outfit would feel like Too much. Thus I went with homogenous green/blues and silver for the metal color.

5. His nose...his head shape...his more "Canine" Features I guess are just huge charmpoints to me. Yes this is me just gushing about my love for my own character but if you clicked read more thats ur own doing. Ive said this before but Leo is Heavily Mexican coded, this plays into both his design and lore in a lot of ways.

Xolotl is the Nahuatl god of death, hes a dog! Dogs being a bit of a symbolism for companions in the afterlife and guides was really important to me, so its why I do really adore what canine features Leo does have (I know Hyenas arent canines but you can see the same kind of shapes.)

Id gush more but thats the big ones....

Leo became a Tribune of the Blood Legion, because bangar wanted one of his own reporting back on the growing power of the Pact and the Pact Commander that was less of a loose canon than Rytlock, especially as theyre investigating draconic threats with the underlying ulterior motive. For now, hes playing along.

[writerblue275]

My favorite LoL skin (with photos) for each Heartsteel member (excluding their Heartsteel/Prestige Heartsteel and Base skins)

So I absolutely adore the Heartsteel skin line, and for Aphelios, Kayn, and Yone, their Heartsteel skins are arguably my favorite skins of theirs (especially Yone’s Prestige Heartsteel skin). HOWEVER. I want to talk about some other amazing skins too. Three of the ones I’ll mention come from the same skin line, but listen, it’s a beautiful line. Also note: These are based on the splash art. I know some of the aesthetics change when translated to a player model. Ok let’s GOOOOO!

Aphelios: Spirit Blossom Aphelios

I love the COLORS of this skin. I love Spirit Blossom Aphelios’ hair design (like damn Phel go off with the man bun/small pony I see you), outfit/accessories, the markings on his face, and how his horns are opposite to Alune’s. (Also can we discuss how Alune also looks so pretty here like omg. I’m so glad they made sure she fit into this as well.) But Aphelios just looks softer than some of his other skins and it’s an interesting vibe from him. I dig it!

Ezreal: Faerie Court Ezreal & Prestige Heavenscale Ezreal.

(Listen I genuinely can’t fucking pick between them so he gets two.)

THE OUTFIT (with all its wing motifs). THE WINGS. THE PINK HAIR. HIS expression!! I love the redesign of his gauntlet as well. Another thing that I really enjoy is how they managed to keep his face markings and make them unique. His face markings are a trademark element of Ezreal’s base skin so I’m glad they kept those here. AHHHHH HE JUST LOOKS SO GOOD. This is just such a fun reimagine for his character.

This might be one of his two newest skins but holy fuck it’s already one of my favs. His HAIR. MY GOD IT’S SO GOOD?? His pose and expression exude so much power and confidence. His gauntlet with the draconic claw and his horns is just so fun. Also that OUTFIT? His outfit genuinely looks amazing. The color combo of light blue, maroon, and gold is just EXCELLENT. Again, they also kept face markings of some kind, even if they moved from his cheeks to his forehead.

Kayn: Snow Moon Kayn

Kayn’s skins are always fun because you really get 3-in-1 with Kayn, his shadow assassin form, and Rhaast. I love a good black and red (with gold accents) theme and the Loki-esque horns, as well as the addition of the furs on his basic Kayn form are really cool. And the shaddow assassin’s hair. My goodness I do love a man with long white hair 😂 (this will appear again later). I love the color contrast between the shadow assassin and Rhaast designs as well. Also Rhaast looks badass. Terrifying, but still badass.

K’Sante: Prestige Empyrean K’Sante

This skin is so fucking cool. We get to see his face here unlike the original Empyrean K’Sante skin. I love the color scheme with the purple, gold, white, and pink as well as the designs on the clothes/his weapons. The little pink on his face also adds a really small but eye-catching detail that I very much enjoy. Also Lil Nas X helped design this skin and I think that’s so fucking cool.

Sett: Spirit Blossom Sett

Ok listen yes a bit of the reasoning for all these is that the characters themselves look fine as fuck. But holy shit look at Sett here. LOVE his long white hair (hehe what did I say it’s a pattern) with his ears here. That outfit and the accessories are stunning. And again the color palette for the spirit blossom line is just so pretty. Sett just looks so in charge and powerful here. He really is the boss. (Also shoutout to the [I believe] first instance of canon SettPhel which happened in the lore/voice interactions for this line.)

Yone: Spirit Blossom Yone

Look at him. LOOK AT YONE. There is something about Yone with longer white hair that is just so…right, even if it’s tied back or braided. All the beautiful shades of purple in his outfit too! I love. I also like how, besides the horns and his hands/arms, he seems almost human and he’s not stuck to his mask like in his base skin (though I do love his base skin). He also just gives off really pleasant vibes in this. I cannot explain it lmao.

These are my thoughts! These are just my opinions, and frankly so many of these champions have so many amazing skins. I’d love to hear your favorites if you have opinions!

[misc-obeyme]

i would read the barbatos essay ‼️

Anon, you have made my entire day lol. I'm always worried about answering asks with lengthy posts because I can really ramble on and on. But since you asked for the Barbatos essay, well...

Buckle up 'cause this turned out quite long! I'm putting it under a cut just so people don't have to scroll.

There's only one section of spoilers, which I indicate so you can skip it if you like!

Here it is, my Why I Love Barbatos essay:

Okay, first we have his design and the color scheme. That teal is just so pretty. And the way his hair has that one streak of brighter teal? Perfection. I very much think Barb would look amazing with long hair, too.

The way his uniform is altered to look more like a butler. The way he's always wearing those white gloves. When he actually does take off the gloves?? Though I do wish they had given him a casual outfit, they kinda do this with all the side characters - all of them are missing at least one outfit that the bros have. BUT it's funny to think that Barb just wears his uniform all the time instead AND sometimes he does take off the jacket when he's about to get into something. Such as in the Dust-Fighting Demon SSR and the Face Paint Charm SSR.

And then there's his human world outfit?! It's perfect for him. Elegant and unique and just visually interesting. And if iirc it's like a tea merchant outfit? I mean. Of course it is.

Demon form? Perfection. THAT TAIL. I wanna touch it so bad. And his horns are just so different from everybody else's. They're so unique. And the outfit? It's like butler uniform but upgraded. The patterns and the colors and the frills that come out of the wrists I just love it so much.

Needless to say, I very much love Barbatos's design. Visually he's just so pretty and I think that is part of what initially drew me to him. But in the end, what it really comes down to for me is personality, too.

I think there are a couple of things about Barbatos that I really love that just made him become my absolute favorite.

He's not instantly in love with MC. People have talked about this before. It takes basically all four seasons for Barbatos to say or do anything that indicates he might have feelings for MC. A lot of his more romantic interactions happen in his Devilgrams and the events, which are outside of the main story line. (A Party Just For Two UR card is one of my all time faves when it comes to romance with Barb and most of it happens in the kitchen lol.)

The thing about this that was always interesting to me was that he didn't act like he was NOT interested or that he disliked MC or anything. In fact, he always seemed to be curiously intrigued by MC. While most of the other characters usually develop a kind of crush on MC before they're just straight up in love with them, Barb is just kind of like, oh you are interesting. But that's it until much later in the story. And even THEN we don't get a straight confession out of him.

I have always been a fan of the slow burn. The little moments that just steadily increase the character's feelings, the build up, the anticipation... it's so good.

And then there's just how mysterious he is in general. We know very little about him. In the beginning I was like okay so who is this guy? He's just a butler? I don't get it. And yeah, he's a butler, but then you find out he's also got time powers and portal powers and suddenly he's a lot more than just a butler.

NB spoilers here for his Tea Time With You UR+ Devilgram:

The story in this Devilgram really hints to there being so much more about WHY Barbatos is Diavolo's butler. He talks a lot about atonement and how something he did had a profound impact on both Diavolo and Solomon. He won't tell us what it was because he's not ready to reveal it, which is not surprising, but also indicates that it still weighs on him pretty heavily. At least it does in the NB timeline. To me, this added a whole new layer to his air of mystery. We don't know why he stays as Diavolo's butler except that he says he likes it and that's what he wants to do. But there is clearly another piece to that involving some self imposed penalty for whatever he did.

End spoilers.

And even though there's a lot we don't know about him and especially his past (which to be fair, there are probably a billion years of past there so we'll never know all of it lol), he just has this comforting way about him. Once he accepts someone as sort of being in his charge, he takes care of them without being overbearing. He sort of does this thing where he gives each person in his life as much as they need from him.

Diavolo is the obvious example and he needs the most from Barb. So Barbatos does a lot for him and Dia is always his priority. But then we've also got characters like Luke and Solomon. With Luke, Barbatos is always ready to teach him how to bake or give him advice when he asks for it. But he also doesn't smother him or anything. He knows that Luke has Simeon and Solomon that help him, too. And with Solomon, Barbatos only really helps him when Solomon asks. In the OG, it's pretty clear that by that point, Solomon is incredibly independent. He doesn't need a lot of attention from Barbatos anymore, so Barb just lets him do his thing for the most part. But if Solomon does need him, Barbatos has no problem helping. (I am assuming, of course, that the only time that Sol forced Barb to do something he didn't want to do was in the labyrinth in NB.)

And I think this tendency to care for people extends to MC as well, but he knows that MC has everyone else looking out for them, too. So he's willing to sort of stay in the background, but you know that he's paying attention to MC. He will sometimes ask MC to come help him with something in daily chats or he'll invite them over for tea and he always says something about being happy to see them.

Another thing I love about his personality is his tendency to be subtly teasing. He's always so super formal and restrained that sometimes it's hard to tell when he's teasing because he does it the way he does everything else. But we all know that one demon sticker he sometimes uses, the one that's covering its mouth 'cause it's laughing slyly. Yeah, that one. It's kind of similar to the way he always smiles even when he's angry. He never breaks his butler persona, but those who know him can tell when he's being playful and when he's actually angry. (Unless he's really angry, which we have seen in the way he interacts with Solomon in Nightbringer.)

And then there are his interests. He loves tea, as we know, and he likes to cook and to bake. For me personally, these are big reasons why I love him, too. I drink both coffee and tea, but when it comes to tea I'm really picky. I only drink loose leaf tea that I buy by the ounce and I know about the different kinds and what my favorites are and how to make them correctly. I sometimes cold brew loose leaf tea to make iced tea and I have a very particular way of making it. So like... I get all that, you know? I think I would love to experience the way Barbatos makes tea. I also enjoy cooking and baking, but I don't get to do it very often. However, I absolutely have a sweet tooth. So again, I'm just imagining tea parties with Barbatos in the garden with some tasty dessert he made and that sounds like absolute heaven to me lol.

He's also just a little less boisterous than most of the other characters. He's calm and collected. I have some anxiety issues and I'm an introvert, but I just get the feeling that spending time with him would be so nice and relaxing. There's just something about him that makes me feel peaceful and contented.

And all of that is why I'm in love with Barbatos.

If he turns out to be Nightbringer, I don't know how I'll feel about it. I'm just hoping they don't change his character too much because I love him just as he is now.

[adobe-outdesign]

Have you reviewed the snorunt line? Froslass is my face

I already reviewed Froslass over here, but as for the rest of the line:

Snorunt's probably one of my favorite ice-types. It's cute, it's unique, it has a great design, and it even has a great shiny (that I was lucky enough to catch in PLA).

The inspiration behind this one might be a bit obtuse to American audiences, but it's based off a yukinko (a yokai that appears during snow and wears a yuki mino, which is a conical snow coat). It also has a few elements of a zashiki-warashi mixed in there with the whole "bringing fortunes to homes" thing:

Visually, its one of our only triangular Pokemon, and this alone makes it pretty distinctive. The blue eyes pop nicely and help to indicate its ice typing, and the black body draws attention to the middle of the design where the face is. Said black also contrasts nicely with the yellow and orange accents of the straw coat. The back, meanwhile, has a few diamonds on it that reflect the triangular shape. It's simple, it's unique, the theme is clear, and the colors are great. A winner in my book.

I hear a lot of people say that Glalie doesn't look anything like Snorunt, but I actually see a lot of similarities, They're both shapes, just with Glalie being a circle instead of a triangle. They both have blue eyes and the same style of mouth. Their bodies are both black (Glalie's 'dex stating its body is made of rock covered in ice), and both have inlaid faces. Obviously the shape and color scheme are drastically different, but it's not like they have nothing in common.

Visually, Glalie isn't bad, though I don't like it quite as much as Snorunt. Instead of a yukinko it's now more oni-esq, sporting horns and looking more like a floating snowball or hailstone. It's honestly kind of low-key terrifying, not helped by the 'dex casually mentioning how it freezes prey solid and then eats the frozen corpse. Lovely.

Visually, the blue eyes pop and the white contrasts nicely with the black accents. However, I do find myself missing Snorunt's lovely colors; I could easily see the eyes here being white and the body blue instead, which would still look icy while keeping some color in there. I'm also not as big on the holes in the body; there's a few too many of them and it clutters the design a bit compared to Snorunt just having one hole in the front. I think I prefer Froslass to it overall even if it doesn't match Snorunt as much as an evo, but Glalie is fine for what it is.

Finally, we have Mega Glalie. Right off the bat, it fixes the color issue I had by showing ice peaking through the horns on the head, of which it now possesses three (with the new one coming out of the hole regular Glalie has above its eyes, which is nice continuity). It also adds red pupils and cuts down on the amount of holes; all welcome changes.

Probably the most notable thing about it is that its jaw is completely broken and just hangs open all the time, casually spilling out freezing cold air. The 'dex makes this sound more like an annoyance than a major problem for it, but it still takes Glalie's creepiness and cranks it up to ten.

However, the jaw is where it starts to loose me a bit. The bottom teeth look 2-dimensional and out of place, and having the entire jaw be so spiky makes the design look more cluttered than it really is. I also don't love the entire jaw being black; it overtakes the face area a bit too much (I guess it's supposed to look like an oni beard? maybe??). It also adds two white... things, which don't add anything to the design.

I like the overall direction of this thing and the upper half looks pretty dang good, but the bottom half doesn't hit as well. If they dropped the bottom teeth (maybe give it a pattern that makes it interlock with the above jaw to emphasize the broken idea), smoothed out the jaw and made it more white, and made those two pointy things at the bottom black "reflections" of the horns up top, that might've worked. As is, it's an interesting take, but a relatively poor execution, and is probably the weakest design out of the four.

Overall, I really enjoy Snorunt and think it's a pretty perfect design. Glalie is a fun monster but doesn't have quite as solid of a design, and the mega's a bit too incoherent to really improve upon the original. As a whole, while the line could stand to be more coherent, I like these weird as hell snow creatures and wish them the best of luck in their people-eating ways.

[auranovabloggers]

Aura's Darkstalkers Tier List

A tier list based on my personal feelings of each character. Looking at their designs and my thoughts on them with a combination of the canon games and OVA and discussions I have had with friends over the years. Note I only hate the character in F tier. With that said, I'd like to give my reasons for each in descending order:

The Shao Siaster, Hsien-Ko and Mei-Ling: Hsien-Ko and Mei-Ling are my favorite characters of all time. They are the reason I even care about this franchise to begin with. When I first did my curious search on the Darkstalkers Wiki about Hsien-Ko in January of 2020, I was hooked on both of them. Their lore, their characteristics, their designs: something just clicked. But not just clicked, something connected to a soul like level. No other fictional characters have I ever obsessed over, made so much art of, thought about straight for years, or spent literally hundreds if not close to thousands on art commissions and merchandise. Hsien-Ko and Mei-Ling mean literally everything to me. They are why I learned about this series, why I met some of the amazing friends I have now, and the inspiration for my drive with art. Hsien-Ko and Mei-Ling are truly the greatest. Equal in my eyes and in my heart.

Felicia: In general, I feel Felicia is a great character. The idea of her backstory, who she is, her goals, and personality are generally winners in my book. Despite likely being hated for purely being what she is, she still preservers and believes that peaceful coexistence can occur with Darkstalkers and humans. Noble are her goals and kind is her soul. Her design is kind of a mixed bag as it definitely has some horn to it, I feel, but I like the overall color scheme to her. Plus, who she is, and her lore heavily carries her.

Lilith: Honestly, she is carried by what I think of in my head. She has a hell of a lot of potential as a character. Design wise, nice juxtaposition from Morrigan. I dunno... I think she is cool the more as time has gone on and the more, I have talked with friends.

Jedah: He is a fascinating individual to think about when you think about the world he grew up in. Makai is a fucked-up realm, and the dude showed some semblance of actually giving a damn about the future of his home. But then he got fucked over by his confidant. All that stuff twisted his mindset and set him on the path for what he believed was the right path for all once he came back from death. Interesting individual indeed and a much more compelling antagonist compared to Pyron.

Jon Talbain: His backstory is fine. His personality is alright. I just really love the idea of a martial artist werewolf. And honestly, the idea of an individual trying to conquer his 'inner demons' is a cool set up. It has potential to be really cool in my head. I do like some of his sprite animations do show a bit of snark to him despite his generally stoic if not angry demeanor. Also the idea he looks after some kids and potentially teaches them martial arts is cute.

Victor: His family dynamic with his big sister Emily is so bloody precious. And Victor himself is a generally nice dude. He just wants to make his creator proud and have a good life with his big sister. Lovable dude.

Zabel: My friends have tainted me, the bastards. But yeah, Zabel has a lot of class and style for being the zany, metalhead that he is. Great animations, lots of energy, and honest to god I love his tongue. Just how he swings it around in a lot of official art. He is a cool dude. Also, his general design has a great unique flair to zombies/ghouls.

Morrigan: Looking into her personality and backstory, she is interesting. Just too bad people only focus on the surface and porn. But for what she is, a hedonistic thrill seeker who is confident in herself, she is neat.

Donovan: The idea behind is backstory is compelling: due to having no control over his vampiric nature, he killed everyone he knew and loved, including his own mother. Traumatized and with a dash of self-hatred, he wants to find a way to right the wrong he did. Cool idea. And then he watches over this child with incredible potential in supernatural powers and has this wacky sword at his disposal. Nice, nice. One thing about his design is that I bloody hate how his top clothing is skintight compared to his clothing down below. It is honestly bad. But he is carried by his backstory.

Huitzil: Robots are cool. He can do cool stuff and one of them looks after this child. I think he is neat.

Anita: The mystery of her backstory and powers are cool and worth thinking about an exploring. But beyond that, not much else her. Sucks what Capcom did to her and ole Donny boi with VSAV.

Sasquatch: Lovable dude. I wanna give him a hug and take him out to get some smoothies and food.

Q-Bee: I have some personal gripes with the character: all petty things. Design wise... why is she the way she is? Considering that Soul Bees reside in Makai, I doubt their disguise would work well when there are not a lot in the way of humans. I mean...unless there are Makains who see them as weak cause they have human like looks to them. I dunno. The 'breasts' on their bodies kinda look dumb. If they really went in with the whole insectoid look, I think they would be cool looking. As is, they have some neat ideas: the fake eyes and face being able to open to a real mouth.

Pyron: He reads to me as a Saiyan. Prideful warrior who wants to be riled up in the heat of battle. Will start slow as he tests his foes. That is neat. But honestly, not much else.

Rikuo, Anakaris, Bishamon: Honestly, they all fall into the category of having some cool things, but not being interesting enough for me. But I like them more than those below them. Rikuo is a goddamn handsome merman with a wife and son, Anakaris has commandments and kingdom, and Bishamon has his dog and wife. Cool dudes.

Bulletta: I mean the idea of her looking innocent but deep down being this psychotic monster is good. But that is it. Not much else going for her. But it is good, just not enough compared to everyone above her.

Demitri: He is a general sore loser and pathetic individual who thinks he is hot shit but has picked fights with people far stronger than him. Dude lost to the literal strongest individual in Makai and held a grudge long enough that when it turns out the dude passed away, he directed his rage at Belial's daughter and heir. And she did nothing to Demitri other than exist and be the heir to the Aensland house. Sure, he gave Pyron a good suck, but he potentially still lost to Jedah if we take into a possible account that one recording where it implies, he was killed by Jedah. Also, I feel his clothing design, while fine, looks fucking stupid with being skintight. Dude is trying to have this sense of class and high society, but he looks ridiculous. He is dumb and terrible and in all that, it makes him fun to absolutely shit on. He is funny and that makes him likeable.

Marionette: The idea of her mirror match thing is interesting and the design if fine. But not much else to go with

Shadow: A tad less than Marionette, but same general premise. Except dude is a body snatcher.

Dee: The concept is sound. The idea of Donovan losing to his inner demons and becoming nothing more but a shell of what he was. Brilliant idea considering the other side of Darkstalkers: Darkstalkers is silly, but it is also grim. But this idea is all completely ruined by an absolutely godawful design. If this guy is a barely functioning shell of an individual, only continuing due to the idea of finding something, why does he try even dress up in the attire he wears? He should be in tatters, his hair unkempt, just overall look like someone who has not taken the time to look after themselves. But no, just take make him look like Demitri, but even worse.

[taavisplushies]

Pt. 2 of my plushies sorry it took so long, hope they brighten your day

Small bed plushies

Zosia and Dunky

Zosia is my favourite and one of my oldest plushies, I got her 15 years ago. Her fabric is old and worn and is reminiscent of a soft towel but it used to be much smoother. Her eyes are really banged up and she has lots of stitches on her neck because of the washing machine and time. I used to sew clothing for her with my grandmother and would use any doll clothing I had for her instead, now she just has some kandi necklaces. Two for my favourite characters (Mike Chilton and Texas from motorcity) and one that I made for her. One time I lost her and was so distraught that I put up lost posters around my neighborhood and my parents secretly ordered a replacement for me online, but I found her before the other one showed up and it was given to my brother.

I got Dunky from my grandmother for Easter a few years back. Another victim of the dryer but thankfully the texture isn’t too bad because of his fabric already being short and only slightly fuzzy. Over the years his hair tuff has puffed up into a little Afro puff. I love how he is anatomically incorrect with actual legs and arms instead of claws and wings, I think it looks cute with his beady eyes.

Meowko and Pusheen

Meowko is a little plump sausage roll of a uni-cat. Their fabric is slightly longer than Dunky’s and is really fun to pet and scratch. His mane is very fun to flick back and forth. Only down side is their horn has no stuffing and gets crushed really easily.

Pusheen was gifted to me by my brother for my birthday. I used to have a Pusheen hyper fixation but I only have a little bit of merchandise left. The whiskers are frayed and her sound box that doesn’t work anymore but I love her color scheme and like squishing her.

Hamburger and Bulby

Hamburger is a Pokémon Drowzee plushie. He is the size of a hamburger and can be held like such hence the name. Similar soft towel texture to Zosia.

Bulby had the biggest burn marks from the dryer and the texture was so bad I had to sew over it But I’m really happy with how he looks now. It adds extra nice texture and makes him completely unique.

Kirby and Pompom

A little ball basically but very cute and a great traveling size, has a little loop where their tag used to be and fits perfectly on my wrist.

Pompompurin squishmallow very soft and stretchy fabric that most squishmallows have. He’s one of my favourite plushies for stiming: squishing, hitting, playing with the pin, and squeezing him. His whipped cream hat is “stiffer” being more tightly packed with stuffing.

Gizmo and Oliver

Gizmo is a bit hard as he has a vibration/heartbeat mechanism in him but it’s really nice and a good stim. As you can see he’s supper fluffy and nice to pet, and he’s got little bean in his feet :)

Oliver is a bean bag heat pack type of guy. Old and raggedy but smells like lavender and helps with pain relief. He also doubles as a weighted plushie.

zosia!!! it’s so sweet how you have had her for so long, and how much you love her!!! i love how you used to make clothing for her too omg that’s amazing!

dunky is very cute, i love his little puff of hair on his head! and i agree that the anatomically incorrect arms and legs make him cuter lol

meowko looks so cool! unicorn cat!!! it sucks that the horn isn’t very sturdy tho :(

your pusheen plush is very cute!! she looks so squishy !!!

i feel like drowzee is underrated so i’m surprised you have a plush of them!! hamburger is such a nice name too! i like how you can hold them gently

poor bulby :( i’m glad you were able to fix him up though!! he looks happy now :)

kirby is so cute! i bet he would be a perfect travel buddy, especially since he can fit on your wrist!

pompom omg! i’ve never seen a pompompurin squishmallow before, it’s very cool!! i like how he looks like a dessert! i want to give him a big ole hug!!

i love gizmo!! he looks very silly, and his name sounds nice! he seems very soft and friendly too!

oh cool, oliver is a helpful fella!! i like how he smells like lavender too, that’s one of my favorite smells 🥰

thank you for showing me more of your stuffed animals!!! i enjoyed getting to see them and hear all about them!!! :D

i appreciate your kindness and how you shared your plushies with me!!

i hope you (and your stuffed animals) have a great day!!!!!!!!

[kuipernebula]

Hi! Just want to know, what's your stance on people using your blue & white redesign of Rin Satsuki? I'm a really big fan of it, I think it's far more unique than the typical design/color scheme people give her.

I know that you made it quite a few years ago, so sorry if it's become something you'd rather forget.

Oh no it's fine! I'm still really proud of my work on those sprites, so I'm glad they have fans.

Other than colors though, I didn't do much to change the design. It was a pretty straight up and down version of the circle cut design - though the version with horn and tail has more going on, I'm not the first to do that either. So it'd be weird for me to lay claim to the blue and white/pink version of her tbh. But I'd love to see other people with Blue Rins!

[rockmiyabideusexmachina]

2021 Megaman Valentine’s Day Contest Results

Among the many things this past year or so has tested us with is delays, and I apologize that this year’s Valentine’s Day contest results are included in that. I certainly did not plan on this taking until March to get completed, and I am sincerely sorry to have kept you all waiting. But hopefully it is all worth the wait!!

Thanks once again to every single one of you who participated! I will be contacting the winners soon enough. Work will probably keep me from replying to everyone immediately, but I will send a message about prizes hopefully within 24 hours.

Also, my thanks to @subzeroiceskater​ for helping out with judging this year. Not to mention the promo pic above and other assorted bonuses that always bring me a big smile. I might say this seemingly every year, but you all made judging this VERY hard. It might have something to do with the themes as well, but I think both of us flipped and rearranged our rankings repeatedly, and even then, it was hard to decide on who would place. XD Each one of you did an amazing job!

After the break, you’ll see the winners for both categories, along with all of the entries. Raffle prize winners will be noted below by their alias, as well.

Category 1: Kiss From a Rosered (Talent)

For our talent category this year, the theme focused on your favorite Megaman characters giving roses to their special someone, along with incorporating the symbolism of specific rose colors within the piece. That rose color was also to be the predominant color within the piece, to the best of your ability.

A grand total of 9 entries were submitted for this category. You can see the full gallery of all entries at full-size [HERE]. Each entrant’s name will also link to their individual pieces at full-size.

1.) Sapphire: *$100 prize*

Subzeroiceskater said:

Oooooh, this is so cute and pink! Piiink~ Ehem. I love the depth, angle, and color grading of these—notice how Roll’s black linework is at the forefront of the pic but colors mixes with the lights and colors from the sun further along the pic. There’s a lot to admire about how everything easy to read with so many competing elements like the similar hues and bright lighting.

Pink roses usually mean a gentler sort of love but did you know that different shades of pink could signify different things as well? A darker shade may mean gratitude; medium shade could be about a first love or congratulations while a light shade may mean admiration. Tron holding a singular pink rose with varying shades of pink while literally tripping over herself and a Servbot could only mean—that this is hilarious.

Miyabi said:

From a technical standpoint, I think your piece clearly felt the most polished, crisp and virtually professional of the bunch. But more than that, I felt it also best gave off the vibe of the rose color dominating the piece, but in very subtle, beautiful ways. Where as the pink sunset causes many of the normally white areas, like Roll’s collar/sleeves, parts of Gustaff, and more, to ooze that pink lighting. Even with her klutziness, you still also portrayed the feeling of sweetness, admiration and appreciation that a pink rose conveys. Just so pretty, calming, and joyful to look at!

2.) Forceway: *$75 prize*

Subzeroiceskater said:

There is a sort of gentle irony with how Skull Man and Shade Man are both robots modeled after horror symbols—skulls and vampires—but are here surrounded by a soft sea of pink roses. The dark night is often depicted as a primal fear because it hides our deepest fears but here—illuminated by the bright shining moon—the night is transformed into a scene of love—perhaps devotion, with how Shade is gently cradling Skull, as well with the church bell in the background. This is a very tender piece mixing the shadows and the sweet.

Miyabi said:

I know most digital art programs have the brushes and shortcuts to make detailing things like roses a lot easier, but your bed of roses certainly look all done by hand on your own, and that alone impressed me a ton! Based off of the Ariga Megamix tale of Skull Man not feeling appreciated or having a family after Cossack stored him away, I felt the pink roses and Shade showing him that he is actually appreciated here was a fantastic conceptual choice. Purples in the sky and Shade’s body split the canvas and contrast with the pink well, including how you used the pink for some of the stars in the sky. Beautiful job!

3.) DigitallyFanged: *$50 prize*

Subzeroiceskater said:

Yellow is a bright color, often evoking the sun, warmth, light, joy and hope. With roses, its positive connotations continue with possible meanings of friendship, care and remembrance. Tabby’s piece seems to evoke the last one the strongest—with Zero, broken and forgotten in a lab—but, not entirely, because of a bond that is stronger than apparent death lives on—even if in this moment, it’s only a memory. Even the roses are not real—just projections of what was once alive. This is fantastic use contrast with the dark, moody blues against the vivid, almost defiant yellows; and the repeated little motifs such as X crying and the water drops falling all over Zero. It stands out from the rest of happy entries with how sad it is but it still manages to be hopeful.

Miyabi said:

Zero’s blonde locks certainly are an iconic part of his design, so playing off of that and focusing on yellow as your rose color fit perfectly. You definitely made this a very emotive piece considering technically, neither of these two are even alive and moving here! As mentioned above, the little details like the water droplets balancing against Cyber Elf X’s tears, the digital lines to make it appear like X has created the cyber-roses for Zero, and Zero’s battle damage caught my eye immediately. You certainly captured the yellow rose symbolism of remembrance and friendly affection beautifully!!

And the rest of the wonderful entries, in alphabetical order by alias:

AbilityField: [Page 1] [Page 2] [Page 3] [Page 4]

*Raffle Prize Winner* Captain N Mega Man Cel

Subzeroiceskater said:

It’s so poetic about how this contest theme is about how the language of flowers is used to communicate feelings beyond just using words; and so, the comic is completely silent, relying on actions to convey its meaning. Yellow roses could mean friendship, care and affection; and it’s shown wonderfully with how Iris and Lan are so thoughtful with one another. It’s so cute how Iris missed Lan only because he was already out buying roses for her. Given how hard comics are to make and how this is fully colored, I really wanted to give this first place—however I felt the color usage of yellow could have been stronger, especially with the last page, where it would have had the most impact. I had to squint and zoom out to even see if the lighting had changed. Still, it’s such a very warm and lovely work.

Miyabi said:

I always appreciate the effort people put into making multiple-page comics for these contests, and this is no exception! Even without dialogue, you did a great job at conveying your story through your art in each panel and it was easily understandable. Another utilizing the yellow rose, I certainly felt the friendship and warmth in your tale. As Subzero mentioned, the only thing keeping it from placing was that the yellow colors weren’t as dominant in other areas of the pic, besides the panel by Sal. Still, your coloring was very crisp and vibrant throughout each page, and it was an awesome submission!

aw-colorcat:

Subzeroiceskater said:

With the red for Metal Man, orange for Cut Man and the explosion of yellow flowers, that’s the trifecta of warm colors. Yellow roses could mean delight and this pic is delightful in all ways. Cut looks so cute practically swimming in the sea of flowers and greenery, as does Metal’s adorable expression—which is a feat since he only shows his eyes. I also really like the juxtaposition and balance of this piece from: the rust-brown car against green-yellow nature running wild, and Metal holding a bouquet meanwhile Cut’s covered with plants. It makes me want to get some fresh air myself!

Miyabi said:

Cut Man looks grateful for being able to ride in that pickup bed of flowers, and I have a feeling the two of them had a wonderful time just snipping and sawing away at all the stems to gather them all. XD Love how the yellow and oranges play off of both character’s color schemes nicely. The subtlety of the yellow flowers in the foreground, along with the sun and tree in the background all play off each other well, too! Just an absolutely cute pic!

Dark-Dullahan: 

Subzeroiceskater said: 

What a fantastic composition. Dark-Dullahan does away with most color, leaving the colors of the mixed-bouquet roses as the main focal point. Classic red for romance, a gentler pink for affection, mixed yellow roses to signify caring and probably so much more—seems like Nana can’t contain her feelings for Massimo. I love how the close up of the bouquet doesn’t just form a kind of heart at the top but serves as the divider between the two, like a diptych. With such a wonderful offering, Massimo would surely accept her feelings.

Miyabi said: 

As you brought to my attention, your mixed bouquet had a few different meanings, such as the dark pink representing thanks to Massimo for saving Nana from Silver Horn, and the red tips on the yellow roses to symbolize falling in love. Certainly got those vibes from her shy demeanor, as she sheepishly tries to hand them to him. Also agree with Subzero that the line from the bouquet nicely works as a way to separate them uniquely with the background. Sorry you weren’t able to complete it as fully as you had hoped, but the concept behind it certainly was strong!

Donnie:

Donnie also sent in an alternate version made during the creative process, in a different artistic style, that I still feel needs to be shared, as well. Fun to see the contrast, yet still have the same feeling and mood to the piece. 

Subzeroiceskater said:

Oh, I adore this one. It reminds me of a movie poster with the tagline. I love the extra PINK flourishes of the letterings like with the Mega Man logo color change and cute pixelated font and heart. Both Rock and Roll’s expressions are so cute, too—with his more subdued smile contrasted with her exuberant grin. Much like how the pink rose could mean many things like thoughtfulness, cheer or as a show of appreciation, this piece is positively sparkling with affection, hearts and all. It’s clever how the sunset is giving the picture an overall pinkish-red hue while having the yellow light as an outline. A darling piece.

Miyabi said:

With pink roses again, I truly liked the additional hue adjustments where you can feel the warmth and see the lighter pink mixed into their skintone, or areas normally of white - from eyes to teeth to the Megaman logo - that have taken on the pink in it’s place. With the painterly watercolor style you used, it all blends in nicely. Even in your earlier version, I feel you brought a strong game with the hues, but toned down the red from that version to make it feel much stronger towards pink, with a tighter crop of your canvas. It was fun to see how it evolved, and strengthened your piece in doing so! Fabulous job!

DragonMarquise:

Subzeroiceskater said:

No better way to show how madly in love you are than a bouquet of roses that run the gamut of—I can’t call these warm colors because these passions are running hot. Orange seems to be the dominant color here—which in roses could symbolize a love that’s passionate, fierce and deep. It’s also expressed nicely with the two lovers embracing, engaged in mid kiss, their bodies also forming a subtle heart shape, to emphasize the flurry of hearts around them. The bouquet is not just orange roses, however, but a mixed bouquet of the classic romantic red and the more affectionate pink—it’s a piece that’s bursting with all degrees of love.

Miyabi said:

You also certainly mastered the limited color pallette challenge as you tackled this piece! Orange, the color of passion, is certainly felt in their deep kiss and embrace. I too caught the heart shape their heads essentially form, which is then further enforced with the heart of hearts behind them. I thought that concept was pulled off very well. Perfect for the fiery intensity of Match, this turned out to be a very hot pic!

Mattasaurs:

Subzeroiceskater said:

This one has a very clever framing (eh? EH?). The color white is often associated with purity, innocence and hope, and with white roses—weddings and marriage. Sonia dons the classic white wedding dress which has a très élégante design—and the little Lyra on her belt is very cute. The pink background is also very romantic and a nice way to tie in with her theme colors. I dig the lovey-dovey feel of Geo doing the classic bridal carry while clasping a single white rose...but seeing the thorns, I think he better watch his hand!

Miyabi said:

For a theme emphasizing color within the pic, I salute you for taking the biggest challenge in choosing white. In many ways, it could have been the hardest to keep as a predominant color, but still make the pic interesting and visually appealing. Choosing to have the petals all around the frame, with the bouquet nearby was a clever touch. With white often used for weddings and new beginnings, I think the concept of your piece worked just right, where it was subtle, but still incorporated enough other color to give the piece some life. 

Category 2: Kawaii-rimi (Humor)

For our humor category this year, the theme focused on your favorite Megaman character gifting the plush form of another Megaman character to their crush, instantly created by a ninja-like character, to play off of the Kawarimi concept from the EXE series. 

With just 3 entries in our humor category this time around, every entrant placed. You can see the full gallery of all entries at full-size [HERE].  Each entrant’s name will also link to their individual pieces at full-size.

1.) Mattasaurs: *$100 prize*

Subzeroiceskater said: 

Y’know how blocks of wood are sometimes used by ninjas when they do that whole body switching thing? I think it’s clever how this pic has Sal—Woodman.exe’s operator—conjuring the doll. Everything about the pic is so fun and colorful: from Sal’s mischievous grin of accomplishment, Miyu being completely shocked by her chibi doppelganger (check out that body language!) and Masa’s confused expression.

Miyabi said:

Yes, while to some, Sal might not be the first one they think of when they think ninja in the Megaman Universe, but I certainly thought she still fits the bill in her design. Usually we don’t see this much emotion or shock out of Miyu, so seeing her torque her body, taken aback at a doll of herself, is amusing in it’s own right. Meanwhile, nothing fazes Masa. And a bit of randomness: oh man, seeing Masa’s head in profile, with his bandana...wow, I never realized how much his head shape with the bandana looks like a fish’s. I can’t unsee it now. Anyways, I also agree that the color, polish, and fun vibe made this a worthy winner!

2.) ColeManX: *$75 prize*

*Raffle Prize Winner* Captain N Cutsman Cel

Subzeroiceskater said:

E-Eyes? What did you mean by that, Mr. RT-55J?  Although judging from the sparkle on those booblights… I understand, Cinnamon—if that happened to me, I’d be making asides to the camera, like I was in “The Office”, too. Cinnamon’s enthusiastic smile with this whole bizarre scene really sells it for me but shoutout to Marino’s smug satisfaction in the background.

Miyabi said:

🎵 I kind of liked it your way How you shyly placed your eyes on me Did you ever know That I had mine on you?🎵

RT says it only has eyes for Cinny right now, but it’s also known to be a little grabby hands, so I don’t know if I’d fully trust it...but good thing this is just a plush version. Time for the tables to be turned, and Cinnamon to get her claws and paws on it, instead. Very cute, although after the DiVE V-Day event, we all know this is a ruse and your pal boobeyes only belongs to the Ferham Fanclub. XD

3.) Ronin-Apprentice: *$50 prize*

Subzeroiceskater said: 

This whole comic is so sweet and fluffy, nya!  ~(=^‥^)ノ☆ It’s adorable how Proto brings up his gift first and the surprise is how Shadow handmade his gift. The little cat-eared Blues design is so darling--almost as cute as him fussing how totally NOT a cat he is. “Did you steal my cat.” had me snorting. Now I’m wondering where Tango went off to…

Miyabi said:

FU-SION-HA! 

Aside from getting his own Super Adaptor, this is probably the closest we’ve got to seeing Tango and Blues merged as one. LOL I’m sure that plush would have a ton of fans wishing it actually existed. The panels where Blues embarrassingly hides behind his scarf and gets pet like a cat had me laughing! Very cute and adorable comic, that certainly had the most depth in terms of the theme of this category!

[reimahowaido]

Spyro: Reignited review part 4.5

Great to start the evening/night off with something I love~~ So let's talk about those Peace Keeper Dragons, shall we~? Titan - What an introduction! This man is rearing to go! Or should I say, roaring to go. You know I had to make that pun~ Aaaah, buddy yeeeees~ I love the purple/magenta/flirt color they used for the accents along with the orange. He's got a nice axe and a great voice and everything about this design is so gooood. Even that exit animation~ I've not mentioned them a lot so far, but some of those are great too. Really embodies that feel you get when you enter the second homeworld Magnus - Big boiiiiii. He's Full of personality! And I enjoy his colors too. They really got those sumo wrestler vibes right on him and honestly I do really like him, he's greeeeat~ I think I might like him more than I did at first. He's definitely grown on me Gunnar - First of all, love the eyepatch. I'll always love eyepatch wearing characters. That's just Aesthetics.jpg to me~ Not to mention that that's a nice color scheme, and good voice - as seems to be the common thing with most these dragons xD A bit too many teeth and face spikes for my liking, but he's good

Conan - From a simple 'Thank you for releasing me' to someone I actually remember~ Not a favourite design, but I do recognize this reference. Didn't read the books, but I remember the Donald Duck comics on Don Quijote (*Proceeds to google name to know how to write that*). The fact he's facing the wrong way at first is brilliant too. Simple but shows that they really put a lot of love and effort into these games~ Although I Do Really like that wing color Boris - "Dry Canyon rewards good gliders" Don't remind meeee. Boris nooo I suck at gliding. A lot of people seem to like his design too, and yeah it's nice, the little rattle snake tail, the bull horns and the bell. Yeah I can kinda see what they were going for. He's alright, I like the wing colors again and he fine, but bruh, gliding. His voice is very nice too though, I can't lie Ivor - Honestly probably one of my favourites of the older elder dragons. He's got that design theme around an old bomber, he sounds nice and his attempt at remembering and saying something nice to Spyro is pretty wholesome. I like this fella. Oh, and it looks like at the end when he's supposed to leave, he sneezes, in the direction of the bomb he's holding so carefully. Uh oh. Uh oh Ivor. We all better hope he either doesn't have fire breath or that he's veteran enough with those bombs to not let such an accident happen. Because if not, oh no Maximos -Heeeere comes one cute big boi~ I did go and check on what I wrote before, I cheated on myself, R.I.P. but I still agree, he does look like a pitbull/bull terrier in a way. Tiny wings for a big boi~ He knows how to appreciate good well seasoned food and we love him for that. I'm not angry at him for being at a place where it wasn't exactly all that easy to get to because I was able to get there first try (and then I died and/or failed several times and had to go get the key again, woop). I like him, and especially that little "Oh, oh I got a little carried away didn't I." feel at the end Halvor - Yeeeee I like him~ He's really cute with his big ram headed hammer. I know that's probably not the first thing that people think of when it comes to Halvor, but I freaking love the lean/hugging of the hammer at the end of his speech. Also he's got a kinda unique color scheme. I like this fella, I dooo Enzo - Not a lot of time to take in this dude's whole design, we don't see or hear a lot of him. I gotta admit I'm not personally a biiiig fan of that chin. Not the worst design I don't think, and the crossbow is cool, even if you only really see a small glimce of it as he's leaving Marco - Slinky lanky prosthetics boi~ Representation here he is~ And he has a halberd too~ I love these little things they're greatttt. He's nice too, gives off some weapon crafter feel to be honest. Yeah he's not as big or buff as the others, but the variety makes me like him more Ulric - Lots of dragons in Ice Cavern, and the first one of them is red, nice contrasting color to be honest. He's got great animations. Not the most memorable to me, but not bad either. He's another fella who is very much fine Todor - But let's be honest, the real reason why anyone else in Ice Caverns loses some of their shine is because Todor Is Here~ Yeeee he my favourite, I really like him ok? Long lanky boi, with big feathery wings that have a very pretty gradient. Nice light blue color, fur, big bow, he's got actual ears, antlers as horns..... Yeah, He's great. I like this fella a lot. Sneaky man giving Spyro some hints. He wink. His releasing animation kinda looks like he was peering upwards as if to go 'yo what is that' so he was seemingly paying attention and aware of what was going on. And at the end he takes his bow and seemingly readies himself to go get stuff done. Love him, love him so much. The only thing I'm not 110% on is the goatie. Not the biggest fan of goaties, sorry ya'll. So, a, part of me is like... What if he has ice breath instead of a fire one? That goatie looks a little like it's frozen, so maybe it's just ice stuck to his chin. Or not but you know! And again, I love

this whole thing where there are different bodytypes for the dragons. Seeing the slimmer fellas among all the big buff bois is refreshing, makes Todor all the greater and more unique to me Andor - Another 'thank you for releasing me' dragon. I like the necklace he was given, it's big and bold and adds a nice little thing to the design itself (wow those words are contradictory, big little, I English, Yes). Big lion tail, he's very polite as he bows. Doesn't do a lot, but I like the design regardless Asher - And another few worded fella with some added lines this time. I kinda get a feeling he was about to get to some life lessons or such and the other Ice Cavern dragons just scattered - makes you feel a little bad for the fella. There's a lot of them in the level, so I kinda see them all as a unit, where the younger dragons are a little unruly, perhaps a tad over confident or narcissistic (Ulric boasts on his size, Todor is sneaky, Andor is polite but will sneak away with the others when a chance is given, Ragnar starts his talk off with a whole 'I, me, I am pretty great ain't I' so he falls under the stuff too. Andor is the least troubling of them all, but they're a bit of a team of rascals. Capable and get their job done, but a little unruly at times, which is why Asher is there. I feel. I've made a whole story of their relations now xD) Asher is fine, he's fine. He's got a lot on his hands Ragnar - I like his design. The smoke from his nostrils is a nice detail and gives him some uniqueness. The hothead of the team? Maybe? Certainly a fire breather though, keeps the place and others warm. I dunno what else to say, I like him in his simplicity Trondo - This man got attitude. Very expressive. Cool weapon bro, also a slightly sneaky hint on 'watch his back'. He's fine, decent, I do like him too and there's some unique feel to him. Not up there in my favourites, but I'd say like solid middle ground or such? Man, I should be doing one of those tier lists now shouldn't I. Oh boy

[kathyprior4200]

Hazbin Hotel Pilot: Gender Reverse

  Charles Magne was the unique prince of Hell. Both of his parents encouraged him to be stern, confident and to never show mercy to any demons. The royal Magne family was one that commanded respect…a force to be reckoned with. Their symbol was the apple, reflecting on the original legend of Adam and Eve. Although many demons in Hell would’ve loved to take over the kingdom, the king and queen made sure that everyone stayed in line.  

 There was King Lilium, a tall imposing figure with short blonde hair and long red curved horns sticking out from his head. He was often seen wearing a thick black pointed crown on his head along with a wide array of fashionable suits. His face was white and pale, his eyes golden yellow. He was formerly a human man, the first one, who was Adama’s husband. Adama then fell in love with the more submissive man Evan, and Lilium was banished. He became an incubus and then a powerful demon. Lilium was a model and performer, always busy singing on stage or recruiting members for his army via his shows. The army was a secret revolution against Heaven and the deadly Exterminators, who slaughtered demons every year in Hell.

 Queen Lucinda was Charlie’s mother, and a very powerful individual. She and her husband were the embodiment of power and perfection, not just by their good looks but from their presence alone. Lucinda often wore elegant old fashioned white dresses, decorated with red stripes and little apple designs. She carried a cane with a red apple on it. A white round hat covered her long locks of blonde hair. Her face was pale white with red blushes on her cheeks. Lucinda had a knack for being goofy and being the life of any party she attended. She would drink alcohol, eat carnival food and play polka music.

 Centuries ago, Lucinda was formerly the light-bearing angel until she was banished by the genderless God of Heaven. Michelle was her sister and became God’s right hand woman. Lucinda showed contempt for God’s creation of humankind but everyone else obviously agreed with God. Lucinda fell from grace and eventually became the queen of Hell. In fact, she and her ensemble of fallen angels were the ones who crafted Hell into a sort of paradise for sinners to do whatever they wished. Murder, porn, thievery, singing, nothing was off-limits. But the cost of sinner’s freedom was the annual exterminations that would take place to reduce the overpopulation of Hell. It was a tactic that not only reduced Hell’s populace, but also served to keep them in their place. After all, Hell consisted of every bad or “flawed” human being that ever lived. Another so called “superior” group to the sinners were the powerful creatures who were born in Hell…the Hell Born.

Then there was royal son, Charles Magne, named after Charlemagne the conqueror. But he preferred to call himself Charlie. He was currently a teenage boy by appearance (he was more than 200 years old) with short wavy blonde hair and a white face with blushes just like his mother. Being part demon and part angel, Charlie could conjure fire and go into his horned demon form at will (He had yet to unlock his true demonic power as a Nephilim). He was often seen wearing a pink tuxedo suit, black bow tie, black pants and shoes.

 Charlie was different from the other demons in Hell, his parents included. While everyone else carelessly inflicted violence upon their brethren, Charlie would dream of a better world full of sunshine and rainbows. As a child, Charlie learned how to sing, dance and play many instruments, thanks to his parents. He loved musicals, reading, smiling and being affectionate toward others.

 When the king and queen showed Charlie his first Extermination, they thought he would passively admire the scene.

 But the prince was horrified at the sight of deadly spears being plunged into the chests and heads of his people. Blood splattered the windows as muffled screams were heard from outside. Seeing all the lives lost year after year made him feel guilty. Why were his parents content to just watch from the safety of their mansion? He needed to help his people!

 “There is no need to help them, my son,” Lucinda replied. “They are common sinners who are merely facing their fate.”

 “So you’re just going to let all this senseless murder happen?!”

 “It’s the way things are,” replied Lilium without even a glance at him. “It’s been this way for thousands of years and it will continue on for a thousand more.”

 Lucinda had added all those years ago, “It’ll be your job as heir to choose a high class woman to marry so our traditions can get passed on.”

 Charlie was tired of royal duties. He didn’t know what was worse, being pressured into honoring his family or the fact that many people in Hell didn’t give a rat’s ass about him. He had met his green-skinned ex-girlfriend Sevia Von Eldritch at the Hell high school prom and danced. Sevia’s brother Hel Von Eldritch with his tentacle white hair, was a rich bully and snob to him. Sevia was charming enough, if not annoyed with him whenever he talked about his dreams.

 “Your childish looks aren’t even enough to get you on Hell’s Vogue covers,” Hel chided to him. “Your ideas of redemption and happiness are a fucking joke! You must be a bitchy clown every day.”

 “Don’t underestimate what I can and can’t do, Hel!” Charlie responded in spite. “You’ll see it is possible to show that everyone can be a good person. Even though you obviously aren’t!”

 Charlie eventually broke up with Sevia and got into a relationship with the aggressive gray moth demon Vaggus. Charlie’s parents were not pleased of the gay relationship, especially the sterner parent Lucinda. More often than not, Charlie felt distant from his family.

 Then Charlie came up with a plan. Using his wealth, he persuaded his family to let him build a hotel in Pentagram City to use as a place of refuge. The Happy Hotel would be a place for demons to stay for a while and to potentially redeem themselves enough to get them into Heaven. With more demons leaving Hell to a better world, there would hopefully be no more Exterminations in the future.

 “What a ludicrous idea, Charles,” Lilium said, shaking his head. “What makes you think your plan will even work?”

 “You know that Heaven has spared us in exchange for all the souls taken each year,” Lucinda explained. “To break tradition would cause all sorts of consequences, both for us and all of Hell.”

 “What consequences?!” Charlie prodded on. “What could possibly be worse than all of this?”

 “You’re too young to understand.”

 “Mom, I’m centuries old! I can take care of myself.”

 “Just stop with your childish fantasies and grow up,” Lucinda said.

 “Why can’t you guys understand?” Charlie was on the brink of tears.

 “Wipe away those tears,” Lilium said. “It’ll be better for all of us if you’ll just accept the way things are. Just think of all the amazing things to look forward to.”

 “No! I can’t.”

 Lucinda glared down at his teen son. “You and your plan will be perceived as a failure to everyone else. A failure, you hear me? Do you want to be seen like that? You might as well be one if you keep this up.”

 Failure.

Failure.

Failure.

 His mother’s words repeated in his mind like a gut wrenching broken record. Was that all he really was to her?

 He raced away crying, it was all too much.

 “Charles!” her mother boomed in anger. Lilium just shook his head, eyes downcast.

 Sooner later, it would be time for Charlies to face the music, as it were. The process wouldn’t be easy. After all, he had lots to learn about the formerly human sinners.

 What would it be like to live as a human? To be free under a blue sky, to watch bluebirds chirp their songs. To fall in love and experience so many feelings…

 Many times, Charlie felt like he belonged on Earth or in Heaven, practically anywhere else but in Hell. Having been secluded for much of his life, Charlie had little knowledge of life on the streets. All the dance moves and Latin and ancient demonic languages he learned wasn’t going to get him anywhere in that case.

 Charlie knew that inside every demon was a rainbow…or in many cases, a lost human soul changed by death and their demonic natures. It appeared he was the only one who could sense it.

 One day, a deathly silence had announced that the extermination had ended. Dead demon bodies littered the streets, and several weapons were lodged in the organs and remains. One spear poked out from a dead demon’s mouth. “Fuck you Heaven!” was spray-painted in red graffiti on one wall. “Cleanse!” was scribbled on posters of the dark bird-like horned angels with creepy grins and xs over their right eyes. There were large red signs reading “Punishment” and “Your days are numbered!” In the crimson sky, a small moon had a glowing red pentagram on it.

 Charlie sadly walked onto the balcony, his short blonde hair on his head, bangs over his pale forehead. A white shirt was under his pink tuxedo.

 Charlie rubbed a hand over his face sadly. A lit up sign read “Welcome to Hell! Population: a fuck ton.” Charlie lifted his finger and colorful fireworks boomed in the sky, signaling it was safe. Another sign read “demon” in white letters. The denizens slowly opened their windows and peered out. More demons came out from their hiding places. A couple of demons poked their heads out of the windows, one of them a red demon with two eyes and horns, smoking.

 The demon prince sang his lament:

 “At the end of the rainbow there’s happiness

And to find it how often I’ve tried

But my life is a race

Just a wild goose chase

And my dreams have all been denied”

 “A ray of hope in this world of black

I wish the world to be free of sin

But no matter how I try

I can’t get by

And no matter what I never seem to win”

 “Why have I always been a failure?

What can the reason be?

I wonder if the world’s to blame

I wonder if it could be me”

 “I’m always chasing rainbows

Watching the clouds drifting by

My schemes are just like all my dreams

Ending in the sky”

 “Some fellows look and find the sunshine

I always look and find the rain

Some fellows make a winning sometime

I never even make the game

Believe me”

 “Will this world be a better place?

Or will loss never go away?

The choice I face

Me a disgrace

A loss of hope, here to stay”

 “I’m always chasing rainbows

Watching the clouds drifting by

My schemes are just like all my dreams

Ending in the sky”

 “I’m always chasing rainbows

Waiting to find a little bluebird

In vain”

 Lilium opened up red curtains and watched the fireworks with a passive scowl on his face. He appeared to have white hair, pink sclera eyes with white pupils and makeup on his face. Behind him was Lucinda sitting on a chair in shadow, eyes glowing red. There was also a black spider Overlord lady sipping wine, and another shadow overlord shaped like a dinosaur. A large building read “Porn Studios” on it in lit up letters. The roof was decorated with strings of lights and a life-like figure of a smiling red shirtless male wearing black boxers with a white heart on them.

 Inside the studio sat three influential Overlords, commonly known as the three Vs. Vox, the television demon had a flat screen TV for a head and wore a black dress decorated with thin vertical blue lines. The center of the long dress was decorated with red and black stripes. Vox wore a black ladies hat on her head with a large red bow and a teal Wi-Fi symbol on it. Her eyes were red and her shark-like teeth were light blue.

 Next to Vox was a small man named Velvet, the doll demon of social media. He had dark gray skin and had long bangs of magenta and dark magenta hair on his head. His eyes were pink with white irises and black pupils. He wore a suit of white, black and pink, the bottom of the suit decorated with pink hearts.

 Finally there was the woman pimp Valentina, the porn studio owner. She was a moth demon with grayish skin, antennas, and pink eyes and teeth. She wore a red coat and had white fluff decorated with little hearts on it. Pink heart shaped sunglasses outlined in yellow were over her eyes.

 Velvet happily took a picture of him and Vox, much to the TV demon’s annoyance. Velvet eagerly tapped on his phone with a big smile on his face.

 Valentina looked at her phone in annoyance.

 Valentina: Did you get my money, Angie Baby?

Angela Dust: I’m wittha Jane now. I don’t get why this needed to happen so soon after the extermination, tho. Boss.

Valentina: Just do it. No sass. K sugar.

Angela Dust: Yes, Val.

  A bunch of imps dressed in top hats and round ladies’ hats feasted on a bloody body after a demon with a messy mane pulled out an angelic spear to sell on the black market. Beside her was an emotionless male scientist with white hair and round red glasses dressed in a white lab coat. He was recording deaths and the number of weapons on a clipboard for Xirxine labs.  

 Rosea was a bird-like Overlord, elegantly dressed in a magenta suit under his long black neck. He had black eyes, light skin and short lavender hair like a demonic male Mary Poppins. He wore a matching top hat with skulls and a black rose on it. With a grin, he crossed out “Franklin” on a sign that read “Franklin and Rosea’s Emporium.”

 A brown furry demon plucked another demon’s head off the ground and put in her grocery cart full of other demon heads. More demons wondered around, including a smoking demon, a teen demon and a demon with a striped suit appearing out of nowhere. The Jackpot Hotel and Devil’s Diner were nearby.

 As Charlie cried, the clock tower rang out and the counter read “365 days til next cleanse.” A shadow painting of a figure (originally Lilith) was on the bottom of the tower, along with concert posters. “Lilium in concert” was on a few posters.

 “The Spider In Kinky Boots”

 A blue demon with many arms fell to the ground. The demon had red eyes and stood up. It looked at itself in amazement. “I’m alive! I’m alive!” A car ran over the demon, as blood splattered everywhere. The car pulled to a stop and a demon got out.

 She was a tall white spider demon, her face and body white and furry. Light pink spots decorated her face and dark pink spots were under her pink eyes. The spots were reminiscent of extra spider eyes. A pink heart was on the back of her head. She wore a pink and white striped suit and high bright pink heeled boots. Pink gloves covered four of her hands. She also wore a black bow tie under her neck and a little black choker on her thin neck.

 She was Angela Dust, formerly Antonia when she was alive. She had died of an overuse of PCP, a.k.a. angel dust, hence her name. She was Hell’s number one porn star, and a common participant in the many violent wars over territory that frequently occurred. She was part of an Italian mafia family that had lived in New York in the early 1900s. The bubbly Rolls was her younger brother, Aracknia was her black furry older sister, and the grey Dope was her mother. Now here she was in Hell, working under the harsh command of her pimp boss Valentina.

 Angela rested her elbow on the open car door, slicking her fur back on her head. A gold fang was visible. Being a spider demon, she had multiple arms. Her left eye was black with a pink pupil and her right eye was white with a pink iris.

 “Thanks for the fun time, hot stuff,” came a gruff feminine voice from the driver’s seat. Tracy, the grey owl demon.

 “Yeah, yeah listen,” Angela said, closing the door and facing Tracy, “Keep this discreet, hear me? I can’t let it get out I’m offering my services to randos on the street. It was a quick cash crab, ya got that?”

 She smiled and snapped all her fingers, pointing to her.

 “Whatever you say, slut!” Tracy mocked with a laugh. A round gray hat was on her head. Her left eye was black with a red heart pupil while her right eye was white with a black pupil.

 The white demon cupped her face dramatically. “Ouch, oh, such an insult!” she declared, pretending to be offended. She leaned into the open car window. Tracy’s eyes shrank back and her ears flopped in fear. Angela smirked, “Let me know when you come up with something creative to call me next time, you poorly packaged sack of horse shit.”

 She poked Tracy and her nose with her finger. “Tell the misters I said hi,” Angela said, blowing her a kiss before leaning back out.

 Tracy rolled up the window and grumbled. “Poorly packaged…” The car flipped in the air before falling with a loud crash.

 Angela looked behind her at a store. One sign had a dripping needle that said ”blood draw” on it. A door had an upside down cross as part of the decoration. A yellow neon sign read “Beg Slut,” while a teal one read “We couldn’t think of a pun for our shop, but we sell hard drugs!” A casino flier read “Casino: just a few wins away.” A red vending machine with the word “drugs” written in white caught the spider demon’s attention. She walked over and glanced down at the options:

 Coke

Bojack

McWeedies420

Squip

Hero-in

Krunchy Krokodil

Angel Dust

 The demon pressed a button labeled “angel dust” and a white sack fell to the bottom. With a greedy smile, she took it in her hands.

 With a yoink, a gray demon snatched the bag from her hands.

 “Hey!” Angela yelled.

 “Up yours, drag show!” hollered the demon before she was crushed by a boulder.

 “Oh my god!” cried Angela, but she wasn’t worried about the crushed demon. She sadly picked up a piece of the sack.

 “My drugs! Damn it!”

 “Something Rotten”

 Angela turned around and spotted a flying metal aircraft, which was firing lasers at buildings. It looked like an industrial rocket ship made with gears and a steampunk style to it. A metal hook hung from the bottom of it. The lasers struck the buildings, which caused bright pink explosions to fill the air.

 From inside the ship, a serpent Overlord stood high above over the controls, laughing manically. Down below, her deviled egg minions stood and watched. Each of them wore black round hats with bows on them and pinstriped round clothing. They were called Egg Grls.

 The room had deep purple walls, cabinets for the minions and decorations of their leader along the wall. The stairs and many of the structures on the ship depicted scales.

 The Overlord was Madam Zmeya. She wore a light gray Victorian style dress with a ruffle at the helm. The dress had yellow vertical stripes down the front. The collar of the dress was pink, the same color as her eyes were at times. She had the lower body of a dark gray and yellow snake, plus a black tail with yellow stripes and pink eyes all over it. Her gray hat was round with a moving pink eye and a grinning mouth of fangs. She sprouted a demonic grin of sharp yellow teeth and her hood was full of pink hypnotizing eyes. Her long black hair swayed, several strands turning into miniature snakes.

 Madam Zmeya had died in 1888 in the Industrial Revolution due to machine failure and a blizzard. She worked on several inventions in London, selling them under a male last name and looked down on those of a lower status. People had called her a “sneaky snake in the grass.” With the help of the blue anglerfish mad scientist Baxtra (who had died of drowning on a boat), Madam Zmeya was able to command and create her Egg Grl minions. (Baxtra, the deviant Hellhound Sobtiny and dapper guy Desperado were off in their own respective places.)

 Up on the platform, the serpent oriented two levers in her hands, the control button in the center displaying a pentagram design.

 “Those other cowardly sinners dare not hinder my territorial takeover! A wise decision. The power of my machines are unmatched! No other demon can compare to the likes of I!”

 One egg minion with #23 on her back added, “Gee that was pretty swell boss!”

 “Yeah!” another chimed in: #666.

 “You really showed them what for!” called a third.

 Another minion teasingly ran her fingers up the Overlord’s spine. “I like it when you shot them with your ray gun…”

 Madam Zmeya punched a minion out the window and whirled around in anger. The other minions backed up. “I wish she’d shoot me with her ray gun,” a minion whispered, head lowered. “Or perhaps splatter me with acid.”

 Madam Zmeya rolled her eyes at her minions. She turned back to the controls and grinned. Pentagram circles revealed the areas she had taken over and the other territories ahead.

 “At this rate, I will seize control of the entire west side of the Pentagram by day’s end!”

 She laughed and bragged some more. “And nothing, not a single beast in this inferno of suffering, will be able to take back this empire from my constrictive grasp!”

 As to prove her point, she grabbed a minion in her tail and tightly squeezed her.

 Another minion blew a noisemaker and then popped open a blue bottle of a brown drink. The Overlord threw the minion across the room as the eggs celebrated down below.

 “Hell will be mine,” she declared, “and everybody will know the name of Madam…”

 “Scaly lady!” yelled a voice.

 “Pardon?!” Madam Zmeya shot back in shock. “Who said that?!”

 She leaned in close to two of her minions, not pleased.

 “What did you just say to me, you fried chicken fetuses?!”

 The minions shook in fear.

 “Speak up!” she hissed.

 “It wasn’t us, miss boss woman!” said a minion.

 Just then, an object shot through the glass at the front, creating a small hole. A small pink bomb with a black skull on the front, landed on the floor. Madam Zmeya observed it for a moment…the bomb looked like a cherry…which could only mean…

 Madam Zmeya flinched back, a look of terror on her face.

 The bomb exploded, covering the room in sparkles and thick red smoke.

 Madam Zmeya coughed and swiped some of the smoke away.

 “You looking for a fight, old lady?” a male voice challenged.

  Madam Zmeya spotted her rival standing proud and casually catching another bomb in his hand: Chere Bomb.

 The man was towering tall in one red army boot, ripped black jeans covering his legs. He wore a loose pink crop top with an x on the front, a few suspenders connecting the loose pants and top. He had short strawberry blonde hair and a single pink eye with an x that took up most of his white face. A chain necklace with a skull on it dangled around his neck. He spouted a grin of sharp white teeth.

 Chere had died in the 1980s in Australia, due to a bomb explosion. He was a hot-headed rebel in a more easygoing culture, always fighting for the rights of LGBTQ + individuals and the downtrodden. He loved blowing things up.

 “Why don’t you get that tinker toy bullshit off my turf before I smash it…” he declared before catching his bomb. A random barbell of metal crashed into the floor close to Chere Bomb.

 “…more,” he finished.

 “Oh, you wanna go, mister?” Madam Zmeya retorted. She flicked her hood back before opening it. The snakes from her hair hissed in anticipation. “Well, I’m happy to oblige!”

 She let out another shrill laugh as her minions closed in, holding stun guns, which crackled with yellow electricity.

 But Chere Bomb just scoffed. With graceful leaps, he avoided the blasts and threw down another bomb. He used the cover to escape, jumping down and swinging once from the anchor at the bottom of the flying craft. Landing gracefully on the ground, he continued his assault from below.

 “Catch me if you can, reptilian bitch!” he taunted out loud.

 “Get him!” she bellowed through the red smoke, the eggs quickly running around in a frenzy.

 The minions jumped to the ground after him, the Overlord following suit. Chere Bomb dodged a blast, grinned and picked up the minion egg. He spun around and threw the minion straight into Madam Zmeya’s face. The snake threw the egg back at him, and he caught it with one hand.

 “Thanks for the gift!” Chere called out, before cracking the egg open with an evil grin. He placed a bomb into it, then threw it back...straight into her face. Madam Zmeya could only make a face of surprise before the egg blew up in pink smoke.

 “Why you little…”

 Chere Bomb ducked as another egg sailed over his head.

 Just then, a familiar drug-addict white demon stomped on an egg minion and threw a grenade in the distance.

 “Angela!” called Chere Bomb, happy to have his partner in crime arrive.

 “Great to see you too, sweetie!” she teased.

 Another pink explosion filled the air as the fight continued.

 “Hey, thanks for the backup, Angie!” Chere Bomb said as he fired a flaming red blast from a metal canon weapon toward Madam Zmeya.

 Angela Dust laughed, leaning against volcanic rock as cover. She threw a grenade over her white head.

 “Hahaha! Are you kiddin’? This is the best action I’ve seen in ages!”

 A pink explosion rocked the streets.

 “Where have you been anyway?” Chere asked as he removed a fuse from another bomb. “I thought you up and died or some shit.”

 “Oh I wish,” Angela remarked as she lit another fuse and handed the bomb to her ally. He threw it forward, then ducked behind the rock next to Angela.

 Angela continued, “I’ve been staying at this crappy hotel on the other side of town. Some hunks are lettin’ me stay rent-free if I play nice.” They covered their ears.

 A column of green smoke rose into the air with a fiery whoosh. The duo leaped over the rock and charged at the army of egg minions. Using four arms, Angela Dust fired rapidly from a gun at the minions, making some of them explode.

 She sighed, and used one of her hands to gesture. “Y’know, no fights, no pranks, no “problematic language.” His words, not mine.”

 Angela tripped an unsuspecting minion, sending her into the air and exploding in a yellow yok mess. Angela waved a spiked club and continued firing her gun. A pot shop stood in the background, with marijuana leaves near the sign.

 “These bastards are no fun!” Angela complained in frustration. Splatters of yok landed on her head and face. “I’ve been clean for two weeks!”

 “Holy shit!” Chere Bomb yelled after avoiding a green explosion and leaping into the air, more bombs in his hands.

 Angela scooped up yok with her pink gloved finger. “Well, sorta clean.” She smashed apart another egg minion with her club. “As clean as you can get with a shitload of Bolivian marching powder.”

 Angela’s shadowy silhouette displayed sharp fangs as Chere posed in the background, one of his boots missing. A sign read “50% off meth” above a small super market.

 A black chain wrapped tightly around Angela’s waist and chest, sending her flying backwards. Chere Bomb gasped as his ally was pulled away. Madam Zmeya threw the chained Angela hard onto the ground a distance away. The spider landed with a thud against volcanic rock.

 “Oh, harder mommy!” Angela teased with a wide smirk.

 Madam Zmeya gasped, eyes tearing up. “Daughter?!”

 Angela Dust stared blankly, one eye raised, a look of disbelief on her face.

 Chere Bomb rushed into action, landing a sharp kick to Madam Zmeya back. The villain landed on the ground, then hissed threateningly. She stood up and brushed off her dress.

 “You whores have no class!” she exclaimed. “In war, the side remembered is the side with the most…style.” She fluffed up the lace in the center of her dress for emphasis.

 Chere Bomb broke open an egg and tossed the shells aside. Angela stood up, freeing herself from the chains.

 “Or the side that ain’t dead,” Chere added.

 “Speaking of style, is your hat like, alive or something?” asked the spider demon wiggling her fingers.

 Madam Zmeya hissed. “Oh, well, that’s none of your goddamn business, now is it?”

 Angela continued, “Would that make your hat the top and you the bottom?”

 She and Chere burst into laughter. Even a pink “loser” sign pointed at the oblivious villain. “Ooooh,” said a minion near her. “One hellish burn.” The snake slapped the egg with her hand.

 “I’m going to blow you to bits!” Madam Zmeya screeched, yelled, pointing at them.

“Hmm! Kinky!” Angela teased.

 An advertisement displaying a plate of, sausage, eggs and a tomato slice stood halfway buried in the ground. A glowing pink sign pointing down read “pussy.” Another yellow sign read, “Sex here.”

 “Not like that! Pervert!” yelled the villain, pointing a finger. Chere Bomb and Angela Dust held in laughter.

 Angela suddenly pushed Chere Bomb out of the way, as an egg minion shot tendrils of claws from behind them. The claws had eyes in the center and grabbed onto Angela’s four wrists. She struggled to free herself, the cords stretching.

 Madam Zmeya chuckled. “Not so cocky now, are we? You got yourself into this wet mess!”

 “Y’know, you really need to watch what’s coming out of your mouth,” Angela remarked.

 The villain didn’t respond.

 Angela sighed. “I’ve been making these sex jokes this whole time!”

 A drill poked out from the ground, Angela barely avoiding it. A minion held a drill in her small hands at Angela. Two extra arms popped out from Angela’s body, holding her rifle.

 “And it’s obvious you ain’t catching on.”

 She cocked her gun. “I mean, it’s just…sad!”

 The spider jumped into the air, freeing herself and firing the gun. The laser hit Madam Zmeya, and her gray hat fell off.

 Chere Bomb popped up next to Angela, walking sideways. “Think you’re gonna get into a lot of trouble for this?”

 “Eh, what’s one little brawl gonna cause?” Angela shrugged her shoulders and retracted her extra arms. Madam Zmeya lay fuming on the ground.

 More egg minions scrambled over to the edge of a high cliff, overlooking the scene. Egg shells and yok puddles littered the cracked street.

 Chere Bomb playfully elbowed Angela. “Glad ya haven’t changed. You know you’re my favorite gal to party with!”

 “You know it, sugar bits,” Angela replied.

 “You ready to finish this?” he asked. He rolled a bomb from one of his shoulders to his other shoulder, then into his hand.

 Angela cocked her gun again. “Born ready, baby!”

 The duo charged at Madam Zmeya. Everyone yelled. More egg minions fell and Madam Zmeya realized she was running out fast.

 After several more minutes of battle, Madam Zmeya and her remaining minions retreated back to their ship. “This isn’t over, sluts!” she declared at her enemies. “I’ll have my revenge!” The ship hatch closed. The egg minions steered the ship and it rose into the air, almost sending the Overlord flying out of the craft. She tossed out more minions in response before taking the controls and flying the craft away.

 Angela and Chere Bomb high-fived.

 “See you around,” Chere said.

 “Until the next brawl,” said Angela.

 Chere Bomb waved goodbye and blasted music from an Eye Pod (a device made from an actual moving eye. “Hello, daddy. Hello mom. I’m your ch-ch-ch-cherry bomb! Hello world! I’m your wild boy. I’m your ch-ch-ch-cherry bomb!” he sang out loud. Angela Dust laughed and continued on her way.

 After buying some more amino and pot from the 666 Shop, Angela met with Charlie and Vaggus in a white monster limo with teeth on the front of the vehicle. A great day indeed for the promiscuous demon.

 “Morning Report”

 Transcript during the 666 News:

“BREAKING NEWS: A LARGE SCALE TURF WAR IS UNDERWAY IN PENTAGRAM CITY BETWEEN MADAM ZMEYA AND CHERE BOMB. THE SURROUNDING AREAS ARE COVERED IN DEBRIS, SO PLEASE AVOID DOWNTOWN ON YOUR COMMUTE TODAY. TRAFFIC IS “HELLA” BACKED UP. GET IT? “HELL” BUT WITH AN “A” AT THE END? THAT’S A WORD YOUNGER PEOPLE SEEM TO ENJOY USING. I DON’T REALLY LIKE IT, THOUGH. I WROTE IT BECAUSE IT SEEMED LIKE THE NATURAL KIND OF PUN TO MAKE FOR THIS SITUATION, BUT NOW THAT I SEE IT IN TEXT, I FEEL LIKE IT WAS A MISTAKE, A MISTAKE I CAN’T TAKE BACK…LIKE CHEATING ON MY HUSBAND. I’M SO SORRY, MARTIN. I SHOULDN’T HAVE DONE IT, BUT YOU DID GAIN A LOT OF WEIGHT AFTER BECOMING A FATHER AND I REALLY NEEDED SOME SPACE. YOU KNOW, WHAT? NO, THAT WAS A GOOD CALL. I BANGED THE JANITOR, AND THAT WAS A PRETTY NICE TIME, EVEN THOUGH HE LAUGHED AT ME WHEN I TOLD HER I COULDN’T GET OFF UNLESS HE LICKED MY FOOT FIRST. I DON’T SEE HOW THAT’S A WEIRD REQUEST. MAYBE IF I’D JUST GET A HOOKER, HE WOULD’VE BEEN MORE AGREEABLE. THE POINT IS, MY HUSBAND IS A FUCKING SON OF A BITCH. ONE TIME, WE WENT TO THE ZOO AND I GOT REALLY MAD BECAUSE I THOUGHT THE ORANGUTAN WAS MAKING FUN OF ME. SHE KEPT DOING THAT STUPID DUCK LIP FACE? THEIR LIPS ALL PUCKERED? THEN IT STARTED SCREAMING, AND THAT REALLY PISSED ME OFF. MY HUSBAND TOLD ME IT WAS JUST A MONKEY, AND TO “CALM DOWN.”

 A neon logo appeared on the screen, displaying “666 News” in a circle with a neon eye underneath. The names of the news cast appeared on the bottom of the screen.

 A skeletal demon man with short blonde hair and a large toothy grin stood wearing a dark pink fancy suit with a tie. Sitting at the other chair, dressed in a blue-gray business dress was a demon with a gray gas mask for a face along with long light blonde hair. They were live on the air.

 “Good afternoon!” said the man. “I’m Karter Killjoy.”

 “And I’m Tam Trench!” said the masked woman. “Chaos at Pentagram City today as a turf war is raging on the west side between notable queen Madam Zmeya and self-proclaimed spunky powerhouse Chere Bomb!”

Two pictures surrounded by flame borders showed Madam Zmeya wearing a yellow “music band” shirt, doing a peace sign and wearing a pair of sunglasses with a dopey expression on her face. The other picture showed Chere Bomb flipping the bird with a grin and standing under glittering spotlights.

 “That’s right Tam!” Karter added. “After the recent extermination, many areas are now up for grabs! Demons all over Hell are already duking it out to gain new territory!”

 The clips showed Madam Zmeya fighting Chere Bomb with her egg minions.

 “Those two seem to really be going at it, huh? Looks like they’re fighting tooth and nail for that hot spot!” Karter popped a tooth and a nail into his mouth.

 “And I’d sure like to nail his hot spot!” Tam Trench said with a giggle.

 Karter chuckled forcefully. “You are a shriveled pussy jackass, Tam. Or should I say…”

 Adding insult and injury, he poured his hot coffee over her groin and spilled more onto her breasts…

 “No pussy!”

 “Augh! Not again!” she groaned.

 Another picture surrounded by a border of flames displayed Charlie with the letters “Prince of Hell” next to it.

 Karter continued. “Coming up next, we have an exclusive interview with the son of Hell’s own head honcho, who’s here to discuss his brand new passion-project!”

 Tam Trench winced in pain on the desk.

 “All that and more after the break!”

 Karter broke his white mug in his hand, and turned to Tam Trench. “Suck it up you little bitch…”

 The TV went off air, displaying Karter’s mouth and eyes, colored bars and “off air” with a pentagram in the “O”.

  Inside the break room, Vaggus adjusted Charlie’s black bowtie. Nearby, a red tinted sign said that smoking was, indeed, allowed. Another sign read “on air,” in large letters.

 Vaggus had died at age 22 in 2014. He was El Salvadorian and had died from a gang rape of both men and women for being gay. He remembered the jeers from the evil crowd towering over him as they taunted, “You should enjoy this, she-male!” as a woman pinned him down with ecstasy in her eyes. After being brutally beaten, his body was then set on fire. Ever since then, he mistrusted nearly every woman he saw, carrying a harpoon wherever he went. Vaggus could say he was lucky to have found Charlie.

 “Okay, you remember what to say?” Vaggus asked. He had a light gray face and sharp short white bangs over part of his face. The bangs obscured his left eye, which had a pink x over it, He wore a loose white shirt with xs over his nipples. He wore long pants with stripes on them. The left leg had gray and pink stripes down it. Little red horns stuck out from his head, which grew sharper and longer whenever he got angry…which was often. He also wore a torn gray jacket. He eyed his boyfriend expectantly with his orange eye.

 Charlie took a deep breath, enthusiasm in his voice. “Yes! Let’s do this!”

 Vaggus put a comforting hand on his shoulder. He signaled with two fingers for him to pay attention. “Just, look at me and I’ll mouth it to you.”

 Charlie sighed. “Come on, Vaggus! I know what to say!”

 He walked over to the pitcher of red punch. “I just feel like we need to…I don’t know, make things sound more exciting…”

 He tossed a donut aside before gasping.

 “Oh! What if I…”

 “Sing a song about it?” Vaggus finished.

 “You knew I was gonna say that.” He playfully tapped his friend on the nose. Vaggus chuckled after Charlie poked his nose.

 Vaggus adjusted Charlie’s bowtie again and shook his shoulders. “Because I know you. But please don’t sing. This is serious.” He pounded his fist onto his hand.

 Charlie snapped his fingers and briefly winked. “Well, you know, I find I’m better at expressing myself through song!” He stood on the table and arched his arms dramatically. Down below, the prince’s red goat demons Shimmer and Glimmer chewed on donuts.

 “But life isn’t a musical, dude,” Vaggus reminded him.

 “Fine,” Charlie said with a slump. Then he brightened again.

 “But I do have these other ideas of what to say.”

 He hopped off the table and pulled out a piece of paper, hopping excitedly.

“The highlighted bits are the best parts!”

 Vaggus took the paper and scanned it in disbelief. “Uh, it’s all highlighted. Is this a drawing?”

 “Yes!” Charlie answered. He pointed to his picture. It showed a list that read: “4, unicorn kisses,” “5, dolphin high-fives?” and “6, sing show tunes = happy ending!” He drew stick figures of demons standing on clouds under a rainbow with a sun and red hearts with faces on them.

  “That’s the happy ending, see? Everyone’s smiling and happy in Heaven!”

 “I don’t think it’s that simple,” Vaggus stated. He then begged him: “Just please follow the talking points we went over.”

 He pulled Charlie close and stared him directly in the eyes. “And do. Not. Sing.”

 Charlie sighed exasperatedly. “Fine.” Then he trotted over and spoke in an accent. “I’ll just have to resort to my impeccable improv skills.” He gave a salute, several moves of his head and went outside.

 Vaggus somehow knew that this would not end well.

 “Biggest Blame Fool”

 Charlie walked over to Karter Killjoy, who posed in his red suit, smoking a cigarette.

 “Hi! I’m Charlie.”

 He waved and held out his hand.

 “Karter Killjoy,” the man deadpanned before blowing out smoke and snapping his cigarette. “I’d say it’s a ‘pleasure’ to meet you, but that would be a lie. You can put that away,” he regarded Charlie’s hand. “I don’t touch the gays. I have standards.”

 “Yeah?” Charlie asked nervously, looking at a big flashing sign that read “Hell’s #1 News!” “How’s uh…how’s that working for ya?”

 “Look, my time is money, so I’ll keep this short,” Karter cut in. He invasively tapped Charlie’s chest and nose with his finger. “We’re not here because we wanted you here. You’re here because Amelia couldn’t make it for her infanticide segment.”

 Karter mentioned to a billboard that showed a pale black haired woman cradling several dead babies in her arms.  “A Dyer case!” was the tagline. “Who approved this show?” was written on a sticky note tapped to the corner of the advertisement. Tam Trench shook her head in her seat. “Sex! Murder! Weather!” were displayed on a column of three smaller signs.

 Karter slicked back his hair, flexed his thin arms, and continued: “You might be some royal bigshot, but that doesn’t mean shit to me. I’m too rich and too influential to give a flying fuck about what some tux-wearing demon “prince” wants to advertise.”

 “But I…” Charlie began.

 “So don’t get cocky with me, bastard,” he warned, getting into Charlie’s face, “Or I will fucking wipe the floor with you!”

 “And we’re live!” said a voice.

 Karter rushed back into his seat with a bony crack of his neck.

 “Welcome back!”

 Charlie sat in a chair next to him.

 “So, Prince Charles Magne…”

 “It’s Charlie,” he squeaked.

 “Whatever,” Karter dismissed. He took a frustrated breath and clicked his red pen in his hand. “Tell us about this new passion project you’ve been insistently pestering our news station about!”

 “Well…” Charlie cleared his throat. He looked nervously at the demonic crew in front of him. A demon with a TV head, had “words” flashed across the screen in angry red letters. There was a girl with a black hat for a face, an Egyptian-like male with a white poodle, a man with teal skin, a demon with glasses and green snake hair, a demon with two thin heads, several red horned demons and a few Overlords. Another man wore a hat with hanging beads and colorful Day of the Dead makeup on his face. Vaggus encouraged him to go on.

 Charlie took a deep breath, his voice soft spoken.

 “As most of you know, I was born here in Hell, and growing up, I’ve always tried to see the good in everything around me.”

 Karter clicked his pen impatiently. He spotted a green caterpillar and stabbed it with his pen with a predatory grin. Ink splattered on Charlie’s face and around the area.

 Charlie continued, wiping off the dark pink ink from his face: “Hell is my home and…you are my people. We…”

 Vaggus gave him a thumbs up and a smile.

 “…we just went through another extermination. We lost so many souls, and it breaks my heart to see my people being slaughtered every year.” His voice rose. “And no one is even given a chance!”

 Charlie banged his fist on the desk, waking Karter from a bored drooling daze. A buff demon with horns and four eyes with a skull bull face wore a shirt with the word “crew” on it. An imp with a heart on his forehead stood nearby.

Charlie made his way forward. “I can’t stand idly by while the place I live is subjected to such violence! So, I’ve been thinking. Isn’t there a more humane way to hinder overpopulation here in Hell? Perhaps we can create an alternative way to change souls through…redemption?”

 Charlie pulled the buff demon into a side hug. “Well, I think yes. So that’s what this project aims to achieve!” He ran back to the desk.

 “Ladies and gentlemen, I’m opening the first of its kind! A hotel that rehabilitates sinners!”

 The audience stared in stunned silence as Charlie raised his arms. Not even the flesh-eating crickets were chirping through the awkward quiet.

 A bloodstained logo “Radio Hack” was displayed above a window which provided a stack of a dozen TVs inside. One demon watching had deer antlers and a flaming blue face, one of the many cruel Overlords. Sobtiny, the 90’s rocker hellhound, stood with a little demon wearing a jester hat upside down. Two hellhound twins stood nearby, one with dyed red hair, the other purple. A neon sign nearby read “Bar” “Klub Kanji,” and “used TVs.”

In a bar, dark demons wearing cowboy hats were playing pool, not even paying attention. The lead gun faced demon wore a cloth over his grinning face and had a large barrel gun for a face. Her friend looked like a demonic bug, and another looked like a wicked witch from an old film. Meanwhile in a bar, purple and blue dragon-like demons sat and drank while casually watching the TVs overhead.

 Charlie stuttered, “Ya know…’Cause hotels are for people passing through…temporarily…”

 A tattooed dark blue reptile demon stood up and let out a loud laugh.

 “Is this guy for real? He thinks, you hear what he thinks? He…heh, heh, heh, oh he’s nuts.” The demon walked away with a small lavender creature and a tall maroon being wearing punk rock clothing and crazy neon hair.

 Charlie added, “I figure it would serve a purpose…a place work toward redemption!” He weakly added, “Yay.”

 One dragon demon leaped away as a tall shadowy figure stood in the background. The sound of tap shoes approached.

 The figure stood right next to a ratted flier which read “Beware her! Do not fuck with her!” “The Radio Demon” and “Radio Sounds!” was scrawled in white on demons screaming and fleeing from a monster.

 The woman smiled and tilted her head a notch as she watched the TV with curiosity and amusement. Her shadow next to her briefly morphed into a shadowy face with fluffy ears. She spotted the fliers out of the corner of her red eyes, holding in a laugh.

 “Who, me? ‘Obviously’ not! I’d never put on a show and make other demons flee to their graves.”

 Just the thought of it got her excited.

 She had heard of the demon prince before, but she wasn’t expecting him to appear on TV. She certainly never heard of an idea so crazy before. Making sinners good people was even less likely than making pigs fly (which was one magic trick she could easily do).

 When Charlie started to sing, the red eyed demon couldn’t help but tap her cloven feet and silently hum along.

 “Haven’t been this entertained since I broadcasted my massacre of the Ninth Ring. This cute Charlie character is intriguing…”

 Befriending the prince, and doing something different seemed like a good idea. She glanced over at a faraway Happy Hotel building.

 The sorceress knew where she would go next.

  Back at the news station, a camerawoman with blue hair and a white face looked up and scoffed, “Stupid punk.”

 Vaggus punched her hard in the face in response, causing her to fall off the chair to the ground.

 Charlie stared around him, concerned. “Look, every single one of you has something good deep down inside. I know you do.”

 A light bulb went off in his head and he smirked. “Maybe I’m not getting through to you…”

 Vaggus face palmed, knowing what was coming next. “Oh no…”

 Charlie snapped his fingers and his bodyguard demons appeared. One sat and began to play a grand piano.

 Summoning the Disney prince within him, Charlie belted out his song:

  “I have a dream

I’m here to tell

About a wonderful, fantastic new hotel

Yes, it’s one of a kind

Right here in Hell

Catering to a specific clientele”

 Shimmer and Glimmer howled along…

The tempo rapidly picked up…

 “Inside of every demon is a rainbow

Inside every sinner is a shiny smile

Inside of every creepy hatchet-wielding maniac

Is a jolly, happy cupcake-loving child”

 “We can turn around

They’ll be heaven-bound!

With just a little time

Down at the Happy Hotel!”

 “So all you junkies, freaks and weirdos

Creepers, fuck-ups, crooks, and zeroes

And the fallen superheroes, help is here!

All of you cretins, sluts and losers

Sexual deviants and boozers

And prescription drug abusers

Need not fear

Forever again

We’ll cure your sin

We’ll make you well

You’ll feel so swell

Right here in Hell at the Happy Hotel!”

  “There’ll be no more fire

And there’ll be no more screams

Just puppy dog kisses, and cotton candy dreams

And puffy-wuffy clouds

You’re gonna be all like, wow!

Once you check in with me!”

 “So all your cartoon porn addictions

Vegan rants, psychic predictions

Ancient Roman crucifixions

End right here!”

 “All you monsters, thieves and crazies

Cannibals and crying babies

Frothing mouthers full of rabies

Fill with cheer!”

 “You’ll be complete!

It’ll be so neat!

Our service can’t be beat!

You’ll be on easy street! (Yes!)

Life will be sweet at the Happy Hotel!

Yeah!”

  Throughout the song, Charlie imagined giving a shiny cupcake to a masked killer, holding cotton candy and a brown puppy in his arms in the clouds…avoiding the attacks of every horror movie serial killer… (Music Logic)

He pictured throwing drugs into a bin of fire, giving shots to monsters, giving money to charity, disturbing porn additions with a bra…

 Snatching a “my waifu” and “my husbando” porn mags of out a demon’s hands…

 Throwing away demon’s cell phones…

 Knocking over crosses…

 Avoiding a scary spider overlord with yellow bat wings and pink eyes all over her body…

 Giving demons big hugs…

 Charlie emerging in his horned demon form from a flaming pentagram, and jumping with joy in a land full of candy, rainbows, and ice cream.

 Charlie finished with a pose on the table, arms in the air and panted.

 The top hat demon smiled. “Wow! That was…shit!”

 The crowd burst into rancorous laughter and boos, including a blue demon made of fire in the boo section. Karter shrieked and banged his fist on the table. Charlie sank down to his knees in embarrassment.

 “What in the nine circles of Hell makes you think a single denizen of Hell would give two shits about becoming a better person? You have no proof that this little experiment even works! You want people to be good just…because?”

 Charlie lifted up his head. “Well, we have a patron already who believes in our cause, and she’s shown incredible progress!”

 “Oh?” Karter asked, leaning in, “…and who might that be?”

 “Oh just someone named…Angela Dust.”

 “The porn star?” asked Tam Trench in disbelief. She subconsciously unzipped her zipper and Karter whirled on her; “You fucking would, Tam!” His sharp nails left marks on the table. “I’m not listening to a woman!”

 Karter turned back to Charlie. “In any case, that’s not even an accomplishment. I’m sure you can get that hooker to do anything with enough booger sugar and lube.”

 Someone wolf-whistled in the audience.

 “Oh, I beg to differ,” Charlie argued, holding up his fingers. “She’s been behaved, clean, and out of trouble for two whole weeks.”

 “Breaking news!” announced a voice as music came on. Excited, Karter pushed Charlie aside. “We are receiving word that a new player has entered the ongoing turf war! Let’s go check out the live feed!”

 To Charlie’s sheer horror, Angela Dust was seen on screen, crushing egg shells and fighting with Chere Bomb.

 “Oh shit,” Charlie breathed.

 “Oh shit indeed!” exclaimed Karter with a grin. “It looks like the one who has just joined the battle is none other than…”

 He let out a dramatic gasp…”porn actor Angela Dust! What a juicy coincidence!”

 The screen showed Angela Dust with the words “Angela Dust in ‘Well, Ok’: 18+.” Dicks and boobs were blurred.

 Satisfied, he turned back to Charlie. “You must feel really stupid right now.” Karter and Tam laughed again.

 “Ratings!” they added with jazz hands.

 “Don’t look at this!” Charlie called, waving his arms in vain from behind the screen.

 “Well, it sure looks like your little project is dead on arrival,” Karter smirked. “Tell us, how does it feel to be such a total failure?”

 Failure. Failure…Charlie could see his doubt reflected in Karter’s pink eyes and overbearing shadowy figure. Karter and everyone laughed some more, their jeers painful to Charlie’s ears.

 “Yeah?” Charlie asked. He snatched up Karter’s red pen and held it triumphantly. “Well, how does it feel that I got your pen, huh? Sissy!”

 Karter glared dangerously. Charlie dropped the pen with a nervous smile, “Oops.”

 Tam leaped out of the way.

 Karter grew taller, his form turning to shadow. Out sprouted claws, four extra sharp appendages, and four red eyes on his face like a spider. He launched himself at Charlie. Charlie clawed at his hair and landed punches as the alarm went off in the news room. Karter crawled on the desk on multiple legs like an insect, baring his fangs before Charlie jumped at him and knocked him off the table. Tam Trench screamed as her body was set on fire. “Why won’t anyone help me?!”

 Charlie eventually ran out of the news room, Karter following close behind, as everyone yelled.

 “And stay out, you retarded faggot!” Karter cussed as Charlie made a run for it down the sidewalk. Charlie was tempted to strangle the homophobic, news bigshot with his bare hands…but that would only contradict his goal…if he even had one anymore.

 Vaggus followed him and the two of them didn’t say a word as they waited for their ride. Soon enough, a white limo with a monster mouth on the front of the vehicle rolled to the curb. Vaggus and Charlie climbed in…and so did an ecstatic Angela Dust. The doors closed and they drove off toward the Happy Hotel.

    “Your Fault”

Charlie had never felt so humiliated in his life. He sat in his seat and curled into himself. Once again, his ideas were dismissed, mocked, ridiculed. No one was willing to see the good in themselves. The demons were content to wallow in suffering, violence, and cruelty until the end of their afterlives. Tears were already threatening to spill from his yellow eyes, but he held them in.

 Maybe his mother was right. What if he really was a failure, like everyone said?

 As if reading his mind, Vaggus gave him a small hug next to him. “You’re not a failure, Charlie. It’s just…no one understands your ideas. People think they’re…I don’t know…outlandish?”

 He got a sad sigh from Charlie in response. “I just wanted to make things better for my people. I know I don’t feel much like a prince, but at the same time…I feel like it’s my duty…my destiny to being some cheer to this place.”

 “Heh. No one can ever top your optimism,” Vaggus mentioned, with a playful roll of his eyes. “Your happiness can be spotted miles away.”

A small smile formed on Charlie’s face. “Well, at least I can pull myself up and keep going…”

 Vaggus stared, hopeful…

 “…But today isn’t one of those days.”

 Vaggus slumped slightly. “I did warn you not to sing.”

 “I couldn’t help it,” he countered. “How else was I supposed to get my message across?”

 “Not everyone likes singing and music all the time.”

 “My family does.”

 “But the other demons aren’t your family.”

  Charlie stared out the window at the buildings whizzing by. “Sometimes I feel like my family is bigger than just my parents.” He turned to look at his boyfriend. “You’re my best friend, sorta like my older brother…and the only one who seems to get me. You’re part of my family already.”

 Vaggus chuckled softly. “Without me, you wouldn’t have lasted very long out in the big world.”

 “For once, I agree with you there,” Charlie replied.

 During several minutes of silence, the two demon boys locked hands just out of sight. It was their habitual way of showing comfort, and it worked on the many days when Vaggus didn’t want any hugs.

 “Don’t get too discouraged,” Vaggus said. “We’ll get back to the hotel and figure things out from there.”

 “I kinda feel like singing another lament now.”

 “Please don’t.”

 “Fine.”

 The limo drove past the 666 Shop, the Nightmare Night Club, and an Evil Donuts store, complete with slime and worms displayed on the donut structure. Pink eyes decorated the ceiling of the car. Charlie curled into himself again, and took a puff of a breath. Even the painted eyes seemed to judge his every move. He glanced over at Vaggus, whose eye was twitching in annoyance.

 Angela Dust was busy playing with the button, making the car window go up and down, up and down. She froze when she saw an angry Vaggus staring at her. Vaggus’ small red horns stood up in agitation whenever he got angry.

 “What?” Angela asked with a shrug.

 “What? What?!” Vaggus shouted, pulling out chunks of his short white hair. “What were you doing?!”

 Angela sighed. “Aw come on! I owed my boy buddy a solid! Isn’t that a ‘redeeming quality?’ Helping friends with stuff?”

 “Not with turf wars that result in mass murder and destruction!” Vaggus replied.

 “Eh, you win some, you lose a few hundred,” she said with a snicker. “It wasn’t that bad anyway.”

 She propped up her long legs and pushed the window button again. Vaggus tossed a dagger at the button and it fizzed out in a shower of sparks. Angela stared, shocked and terrified. Vaggus growled in warning.

 “Aw come on, I had to!” Angela protested. “My credibility was on the line!” She sighed. “I mean what kind of reputation would I have of people found out I was trying to go clean? It just throws out my entire persona.” She lifted up her furry chest, bouncing her white furry breasts up and down.

 “Your credibility?” Vaggus asked in anger. “What about the hotel? Your little stunt made us look like a fucking joke!”

“No, no no, babe. Jokes are funny! I made you look…uh, sad. And pathetic! Like an orphan, with no arms. Or legs. Uh…oh with progeria!” Charlie covered his face with his hands as Angela blabbered on.

 “Great! Now I’m bummed just thinking about it! This thing have any liquor?” She bent down to the floor and tossed a bottle aside. She then flicked a wrapper away onto a seat.

 Vaggus was fuming. “Can you please just try to take this seriously?”

 “Fine, I’ll try. Just don’t get your taco in a twist, fairy.”

 Vaggus stood up with hands on his hips. “Was that you trying to be homophobic or racist?”

 “Whatever pisses you off more. Is there seriously no liquor in here?”

 “I’m gonna kill her,” Vaggus swore, crossing his arms and sitting back down.

 “Too, late, dude. Wait, would that make me double dead?” She laughed slowly and loudly. “And where exactly do I go? To double Hell?”

 She laughed again. “Sorry, you’re stuck with me, bastard. Get used to it.”

 Vaggus swore in Spanish.

 “Listen, who cares if some jagoffs got hurt?” Angela nonchalantly asked. “Most of them are ugly freaks. Look around! Got a bunch of fuckin’ harlequin babies down there.”

 “You’re one to talk,” Vaggus muttered with a small smirk.

 Angela laughed then yelled “Hey!” in protest. “This body is flawless! Everyone wants some of me and I’ve got the creepy fan letters to prove it!”

 She pulled out a dirty piece of paper from in between her boobs that read: “Show me your feet! Brenda. #1 fan/critic.” There was a picture of a young Angela in the lap of a naked fat lady, licking Angela with her green tongue. She had a tattoo of Angela with a red crossed out sign.

 This time, Charlie spoke up. “That was really uncool, y’know, Angela.”

 Vaggus growled and turned to his friend. “Uncool?!” He mentioned to Angela. “After that train-wreck, there is no way anyone is gonna wanna stay at the hotel.” He turned to the spider. “All thanks to you and your selfish bullshit!”

 Angela glanced at a discarded pile of ash and used cigarettes. “Does this mean I don’t get a free room anymore?”

 Vaggus spread out his hands as if asking “Well, what do you think?”

 She let out a mock sigh and snap. “Ah, well, shucks.”

 Charlie pulled off his dark pink shirt, revealing a white shirt with a black bowtie.

 “Hey, come on, we don’t know if things are over yet. Try to relax, Vaggus. It’ll be okay!”

 Now it was Vaggus’ turn to let out a small smile of thanks. Charlie placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, and his friend calmed down.

 “What would I do without you?” Vaggus asked. He and Charlie slowly leaned into each other, their heads gently touching.

 “Get a room, boys!” Angela remarked, before receiving a “Shut up!” from both of them.

  Finally, the deviant crew arrived at the Happy Hotel. It was an elegant building fit for any demon who wanted to stay a few nights. Eye designs lined the border of a dark pink circus canopy at the front like a creepy mosaic. Branches jutted out from the roof as part of the structure. Old fashioned lanterns attached to the wall had flames flickering inside, nonstop. The double doors consisted of stained glass windows with red apples in the center. Little stained glass snake eyes peered unblinkingly at them from around the larger window in the door.

 Angela, Vaggus, and Charlie got out of the car and threw open the double doors. A random black bug scurried away from the incoming light. A yellow sign read “Concierge” behind a pink “welcome” banner. The check in table was decorated with colored flags leaning toward the floor and random balloons with small star shapes on them. A vase was decorated with yellow eyes along the sides. Another flower pot was in the shape of a human mouth…white flowers posed above. Vaggus sighed and plopped onto a red cushioned couch in the style of a monster’s mouth.

 The red rug down the hallway was decorated with the same eyeball designs, apples on the end, plus shadow skulls of horned monsters in the center.

 All around the room, were pictures of Charlie as a little boy with his father and mother on various trips. One picture showed him and Vaggus in front of a castle at Loo-Loo World, Hells’ version of Disney World.

 Angela Dust came across a red fridge leaning low against the wall. She opened the door and pulled out a purple box labeled “Popsies.” She shrugged at the dripping ruined box and took out a popsicle. She gave it a lick.

 “It’s prolly a good idea to get some actual food in this place. Y’know, to feed all the wayward souls ya got in here.” She laughed nervously, trying to cheer Charlie up. But Charlie just sat sadly on a wooden box in a darkened area of the room. Angela closed the fridge door, sucked on a popsicle and reached out one of her arms to him…then hesitated. She walked away, letting him have some alone time.

 Charlie walked past the two posing elephant statues balancing balls on their trunks, and toward the front door. He opened the door and went outside. Holding out his purple cell phone, (or “Hell Phone, hah, get it?”) he pressed an icon with the word “Dad” decorated with a heart and horns on the d’s.

 Charlie took a deep breath as a voicemail tone came through.

 “Hey Dad. Um, I know I keep calling, and you must be busy. Really busy. But, um…the interview didn’t go well and…I don’t know if I’m going to make a difference. I don’t know what I’m doing. I could really use some advice, Dad.”

 He slid down and sat on the stone ground, tears falling from his eyes. He wiped some away with his arm. “I think mom was right about me. A-anyway, I’ll stop talking before this gets too long. Love you! Bye.”

 He ended the call with a tap and rubbed his eyes with his hand. Standing back up, he opened the door, closed it, and leaned against the stained glass window, eyes closed.

 What was he supposed to do now?

 “Let’s Misbehave”

 A slow ominous knocking from outside interrupted Charlie’s thoughts. He opened his eyes.

 Knock. Knock, knock, knock, knock. Knock, knock.

 It was a rhythmic knock, sounding like “shave and a haircut.” (Or was it “skunks in a barnyard”, or “imps in a cauldron?” He wasn’t sure.

   An ice cold feeling of dread spread through his veins. No other demon would ever do that kind of knock.

 Unless…

 He tentatively reached out his hand to the door handle, and quickly pulled it open.

 Sure enough, the most feared demon in Hell was standing right outside his door.

 She stood a head taller than him, wearing an elegant long dark red dress decorated with thin light red stripes going down it. Several tatters were visible at the helm. The area below her neck had a red undershirt with a black downward facing pentagram for decoration. The pentagram was framed by more lace in a v shape. She wore dark stitched up leggings and black high heels with red deer prints underneath them. Black gloves with red fingertips covered her long fingers.

 And her face…momentarily her figure and face were pretty to Charlie but he quickly became terrified as he looked up. Her face was a sickly gray and her sharp yellow teeth were set in a wide grin. Her long hair was red and black, the smaller black ends tapering off past her shoulders. The rest of her hair was red, up to the black tips of her two fluffy deer like tufts perched on top of her head. She had no antlers. A red vintage microphone staff was a magical item she carried with her. A monocle rested under her right eye.

 Alastra was born French Creole in New Orleans in the early 1900s. She was very close to her African American father who taught her about hunting and Voodoo rituals. In contrast, her white Christian mother hardly paid any attention to her. Although her mother taught her how to sew and cook, she also expected her to take on woman responsibilities of marriage, housekeeping and rearing children. Alastra had light brown skin and beautiful long brown hair.

 Alastra would have none of it, instead she dreamed of playing in a jazz band and performing on stage... and did so for a period of time. But being a woman of color, she had it difficult since the beginning. She applied for music and radio jobs, always being turned down and shooed away. Racist and sexual remarks became daily background noise, almost impossible to ignore. Her mother would frequently give her black eyes and beat her. Several tragic events happened, including her mother sending her to an insane asylum to rot away. She had been diagnosed with narcissism and a sexual disorder. (Why didn’t she want to fall in love with a man?) She managed to escape to the cabin. When her father was drafted for the war and later died, she was devastated at the loss. After being raped and almost killed by men she thought were her friends, she decided enough was enough.

 Alastra eventually became a radio host, Voodoo Queen, and serial killer. After her mother threatened to divorce the family, Alastra killed her with a gun and ate her remains. She killed both men and women but preferred luring women to her home where she would poison their food and drinks. Knives, axes, guns, she used them all. After killing off several higher ups, she managed to form her own radio studio and became the most famous radio host in Louisiana.

 Alastra basked in her fame and wealth, even meeting blonde dapper performer Desperado, who was head over heels for her. But Alastra didn’t want to be tied down to anyone. She would talk about the murders, play jazz music and tell dad jokes, which she dubbed “mom” jokes. Alastra enjoyed the Stock Market Crash but soon found herself running out of food. She resorted to cannibalism for survival. No one suspected her until 1933. She got bitten by a rabies dog and ran through the woods. She died a brutal death after being shot in the head and mauled by police dogs at the same time.

 Due to the deals she had made with otherworldly demons, Alastra gained dark eldritch powers she used to topple Overlords and take over several areas. Broadcasting her massacres was both entertaining and was used as a way to let others know she was not to be messed with. She had an army of slave souls plus two pet alligator demons. She hated Vox and her modern technology. Her fluffy red and black deer tail was hidden under her dress as well as the many scars across her thin body. No one knew if Alastra wanted Charlie to succeed or not, but she would use any means necessary to accomplish her goals. (But oh how she missed her father dearly.)

 Alastra’s large eyes glowed red as a radio buzz briefly sounded. Charlie’s eyes went wide as saucers.

 The woman began to speak, her voice sounding like it was being spoken through a radio.

  “Hell…”

 Charlie slammed the door in her face.

 Opened the door…

 “…o.”

 Slammed it again.

  The woman stood, shocked in front of the stained glass door, smile still plastered on her face, hand and curved claw in the air.

 “Well… that was…rude,” she thought. “Usually people are too sacred to answer when I come by. Or they rush to try and please me because they know I could slaughter them at any time. I’ll just wait here then…or maybe break this door down…”

  “Hey, Vaggus?” Charlie called.

 “What?” Vaggus replied in annoyance on the couch.

 Charlie flashed a nervous smile. “The Radio Demon is at the door!”

 “What?!” he demanded.

 “Uh, who?” Angela asked. She sucked erotically on her popsicle.

 “What should I do?” he asked, pulling at his lower eyelids.

 “Well, don’t let her in!” exclaimed Vaggus.

 Charlie was tempted to do just that. But he also had a duty to not leave any sinners behind. He took a breath, eyes furrowed and opened the door again.

 “May I speak now?” the red demon asked.

 “You may…” Charlie replied.

 The woman held out her gloved hand which briefly glowed. “Alastra, pleasure to be meeting you, sweetheart, quite a pleasure.”

 She eagerly grabbed his wrist and leaned her face close to his before strutting inside. Charlie stood, dumbfounded, his hand still out.

 “Excuse my sudden visit,” she went on, “but I saw your fiasco on a picture show and I just couldn’t resist. What a performance!” She raised her arms before walking forward. “Why I haven’t been that entertained since the Stock Market Crash of 1929!”

 She bobbed her head side to side and burst into laughter. “So many orphans!”

 Vaggus suddenly pointed a spear weapon at her and the doe froze. “Stop right there!” He swore in Spanish under his breath. “I know your game. And I’m not gonna let you hurt anyone else here, you pompous, cheesy, talk show shit lady!”

 Angela peeked around the corner to see what was going on.

 Alastra merely laughed slightly and nudged the weapon away with her fingers.

 “Little man, if I wanted to hurt anyone here…”

 She added in a low creepy tone, “I would have done so already.”

 Her red eyes briefly turned to red radio dials as radio static filled the room. She tilted her head slightly, letting her chaotic magic roam. Vaggus and Charlie were frozen in fear as they caught glimpses of red Voodoo symbols, static, and warped reality.

 Then just as quickly, the noise and magic ceased and Alastra shook her head, eyes back to full red. Her eyes had briefly been black with red pupils.

 “No, I’m here because I want to help!” She curtsied.

 Charlie was sure he hadn’t heard her right.

 “Say what now?” he asked, eyebrows raised.

 “Help!” she responded with another laugh. She held up her microphone staff.

 “Hello? Is this thing on? Testing, testing…”

 She tapped it and a glowing red eye appeared in the center.

 “Well, I heard you loud and clear!” the microphone responded in a feminine tone, eye shaking in fear.

  “Um…you want to help?” Charlie asked.

 Alastra appeared behind the demon boys, hands on their backs, switching from a shadow to her regular self. Both Vaggus and Charlie flinched.

 “With…” she mentioned in an imitation of Charlie’s soft voice…

 “…this ridiculous thing you’re trying to do!” finishing in her normal voice. “This hotel!”

 Charlie could hear the call bell ding twice on the table, even though no one was there to ring it.

 “I want to help you run it.”

 “Uh…why?” Charlie asked, confused.

 Alastra laughed again. “Why does anyone do anything? Sheer absolute boredom!”

  She curled up her fingers before putting her hands up to her cheeks. She then moved off to the side. “I’ve lacked inspiration for decades!”

 She placed her elbow on an annoyed Vaggus’ head. Then she shoved the moth demon aside.

  “My work became mundane, lacking focus, aimless! I’ve come to crave a new form of entertainment!”

 She laughed again, spreading out her arms.

 Charlie looked downcast as Vaggus stood up with a scowl. “Does getting into a fist fight with a reporter count as entertainment?”

 Alastra laughed again. “It’s the purest kind, my dear! Reality! True passion! After all, the world is a stage! And the stage is a world of entertainment!”

 She smiled and titled her head.

 Charlie brightened a bit. “So, does this mean that you think it’s possible to rehabilitate a demon?”

 Alastra help up a hand and laughed. “Of course not. That’s wacky nonsense! Redemption, oh the non-existent humanity! Nononono, I don’t think there’s anything left that could save such loathsome sinners!”

 She grinned at Vaggus and Angela who sat on the couch and shrugged.

  She continued. “The chance given was the life they lived before; the punishment is this!”

  She spread out her arms. “There is no undoing what is done!”

 “So then, why do you want to help me if you don’t believe in my cause?” Charlie asked.

 Alastra smirked and looked at Charlie over her shoulder. “Consider it an investment in ongoing entertainment for myself!”

 She pulled Charlie close to her with her arm and twirled the shorter demon around in a quick dance. “I want to watch the scum of the world struggle to climb up the hill of betterment! Only to repeatedly trip and tumble down into the fiery pit of failure.” Her eyes glowed red in pleasure.

  “Right…” Charlie began, slowly removing her clawed hand from his shoulder.

 Alastra took him aside for a walk. “Yes indeedy! I see big things coming your way, and who better to help than I.”

 “A Cautionary Tale”

 “Ah, so uh, what’s the deal with Miss Smiles over there?” Angela asked Vaggus.

 “Wait, you’ve never heard of her before?” Vaggus asked. “You’ve been here longer than me!”

 Angela shrugged her shoulders.

 “The Radio Demon, one of the most powerful beings Hell has ever seen?” Vaggus asked.

 “Eh, I’m not too big on politics,” Angela replied.

 Vaggus let out a deep annoyed sigh before leaning in close to explain.

 “Decades ago, Alastra manifested in Hell, seemingly overnight. She began to topple Overlords who had been dominant for centuries. That kind of raw power has never been harnessed by a mortal soul before. Then, she broadcast her carnage all throughout Hell, just so everyone could witness her ability. Sinners started calling her The Radio Demon. (As lazy as that is). Many have speculated what unimaginable force enabled her to rival our world’s most ancient and destructive evils. But one thing’s for sure: She’s an unpredictable source of danger, a wicked spirit of mystery, and a violent monster of chaos, the likes of which we cannot risk getting involved with, unless we want to end up erased.”

 Flashes of Alastra in her full demon form, a giant red doe with a long lavender tongue, sharp teeth, long dark claws, glowing red eyes and large ears appeared on screen. She grinned as she hovered her claws over the demonic faces of voodoo imps and minions. Her dress revealed a flaming hole where screaming demons struggled to escape.

 “Ya done?” Angela asked with a snicker. “She looks like a strawberry pimp!”

 Alastra conjured her staff into her hand with a smug look.

 “Well, I don’t trust her!” Vaggus exclaimed.

 To be fair, do you trust any woman? Any women? Women?” Angela asked with a slight laugh.

 Vaggus ignored her and walked up in front of his friend.

 “Charlie, listen to me. You can’t believe this creep! She isn’t just a happy face! She’s a dealmaker, pure evil! She can’t be redeemed! And is most likely looking for a way to destroy everything we’re trying to do.”

 “I…” Charlie began. “…we don’t know that. Look…I know she’s bad, and I know she probably doesn’t wanna change, but the whole point of this is to give people a chance! To have faith things will be better! How can I turn someone away? I can’t. It goes against everything I’m trying to do. Everything I believe in.”

 Alastra stared in fascination at a family picture on the wall. It showed Lucinda dressed in white, Lilium in a dark purple suit, and Charlie as a little boy wearing a brown and white suit in the middle. The picture border consisted of branches and yellow eyeballs and a dried rose in the upper right hand corner.

 “Such a lovely portrait! A picture of perfection! It’d be such a shame if something awful were to happen to them…”

 “Just trust me,” Charlie added, placing comforting hands on his boyfriend’s shoulders, “I can take care of myself.”

 Charlie,” warned Vaggus, “Whatever you do, do not make a deal with her!”

 From a distance, Alastra opened up the palm of one hand, claws curled. Both boys glanced in her direction, worry on their faces.

 “I’ll have these two in the palm of my hand…”

 “Don’t worry,” Charlie replied to Vaggus with a chuckle. “I picked up one thing from my Mom…”

 He spoke in a higher womanly voice as he walked away, “Ya don’t take shit from other demons!”

 Gathering his courage, Charlie marched over to the Radio Demon.

 “Ok, so…Al. You’re sketchy as fuck, and you clearly see what I’m trying to do here is a joke. But I don’t.”

 Red Voodoo symbols appeared around a grinning Alastra, then vanished. Charlie glanced back at her with narrowed eyes.

 Charlie continued. “I think everyone deserves a chance to prove they can be better. So, I’m taking your offer to help. On the condition that there be no tricks or voodoo strings attached.”

 Alastra twirled her cane and held out her right hand. “So it’s a deal then?”

 Flashes of eerie green light surrounded her, electricity snaking up the walls. Shadows swirled around the room and everyone covered their faces at the force of the wind.

 “Nope!” Charlie yelled, holding out his hands. The energy stopped. “No shaking! No deals! I…hmm…”

 Charlie decided to try another approach.

 “As prince of Hell, and heir to the throne, I uh, hereby order that you help with this hotel, for a long as you desire.”

 A moment of pause…

 “Sound fair?” he asked.

 “Hmm…Fair enough.” Alastra shrugged before she strolled away, cane vanishing.

  “Cool beans.” Charlie breathed a sigh of relief and even did a thumbs up.

 Alastra stopped and spotted Vaggus off to the side. She smirked in a way outside observers would describe as lecherous. She tickled him under his chin with a finger.

 “Smile, good sir! You know you’re never fully dressed without one!”

 Alastra hummed happily on her way, while Vaggus growled in disgust and rage.

 “So…where is your hotel staff?” Alastra asked Charlie.

 “Uh, well…” Charlie began. Alastra peered at Vaggus through her monocle. “Oh ho ho ho, you’re going to need more than that.”

 She walked over towards Angela.

 “And what can you do, my butch fella?”

 Angela grinned. “I can suck your pussy and boobs!”

 A screech was heard as Alastra stared in shock and revulsion.

 “Ha! No.” Alastra deadpanned.

 “Your loss,” Angela said with a slight laugh. Alastra summoned her cane.

 “Well, this just won’t do!” Alastra exclaimed. “I suppose I can cash in a few favors to liven things up!”

 The spell came easily in her mind: “dife sèvitè, reveye.”

  Alastra snapped her fingers and a fire sparked to life in a small circular fireplace. Animal skeletons decorated either side of the wall, fully repaired.

 A dark figure plopped down onto the chimney floor.

 Alastra walked over and picked up the creature with her hand. A large single yellow eye was revealed. Angela, Vaggus, and Charlie peered at the creature. In a puff of smoke and a squeak, the creature revealed herself. A cute cyclops boy was wearing a dark pink butler outfit with a poodle on the front, his short hair dark magenta with a streak of yellow. His upper shirt was white with pink paint stains. White spots were on the left side of his pants.

 “This little rascal is Preppy!” Alastra introduced with a smile, before dropping him. The boy landed on his feet.

 “Hi! I’m Preppy!” he greeted with a wave. “It’s nice to meet you! It’s been a while since I’ve made new friends!” He laughed slightly and his pupil grew smaller, darting in circles.

 “Why are you all men?” he asked. He darted over and lifted Charlie up before putting him down. Vaggus growled, aiming his spear at the newcomer.

 “Are there any women here?! I’m sorry, that’s rude.” He missed the fact that Angela was female, for obvious reasons.

  “Oh man, this place is filthy!” he exclaimed, running around and lifting up couch cushions. “It really needs a more man cave, homey touch, which is weird, because you’re all men, no offence.” He chewed on a black spider he found, then rushed toward some stained glass windows.

 He darted around, using a dust ruffle to clean them, removing spider webs. “Oh my gosh, this is awful! No, no, no…Nope!”

 Preppy raced around, removing cobwebs, then poked at a piece of a voodoo doll. Well, it was actually a blue beetle doll that Alastra had stabbed with a clothing pin for him to play with. Preppy turned and exclaimed, “Oh my goodness, a dirty rat!” He dashed over, scooped up the dark grey creature and popped it into his mouth rapidly. Strained squeaks mingled with rapid chewing sounds. “I bet there’s tons of them under this place, I’ll be sure to get more!”

 Alastra looked amused, while the others stared in disbelief.

 “So fortunate of me to have met him in Hell. A former chimney sweeper in the 20th century. Heard he died from being burned alive in a fireplace. Services are still good! Though, I didn’t give him much of an option to begin with…”

 Meanwhile, at a casino, a cat demon placed a joker, an ace, a 2, and a fourth card down on the table. She had black and white fur, fluffy breasts, wore a black round hat and had red wings with card suits decorated on them. She also had long red eyebrows and wore a red bow tie.

 “Ha!” she declared in triumph. “Read ‘em and weep, girls!”

 She suddenly felt herself being forcefully pulled out of the room through space and time.

  “Full…whoa!”

 “Transpòte ganbadeur la.”

 She ducked as a curtain of red energy surrounded the existing space. Voodoo symbols flashed in the background along with eight yellow eyes, a creepy voodoo skull and a purple skeleton of a worm-like creature. Another voodoo skull with horns appeared for a moment not too far from tan ghost-like spirits with creepy faces and a row of jagged teeth.

 The cat demon figured she must have had too much booze to drink.

 “…the hell?”

 As the images faded, she soon found herself at the hotel bar, not in the previous room at the casino. A large “Come and play Blackjack” sign took up much of the wall behind her. Most peculiar, the gray wood walls were missing halfway up, replaced by the red themed décor of the hotel. She was sitting in a portion of the casino she was in. It felt like she was in a house with no roof surrounded by the outside world.

 “What the fuck is this?”

 She saw Alastra and pointed an accusing claw.

 “You!”

 “Ah, Shella, my good friend!” Alastra cheerfully greeted as audience claps came from the microphone. “Glad you could make it!”

 Alastra’s head briefly had the appearance of large antlers sticking out from either side. When she moved it, it was revealed to be an antler skull with glowing green eyes hanging in the background. Snakes were wrapped around one of the pillars supporting a bar stand. “Big Booze,” “Welcome” and “Big Soul” signs were placed overhead on the stand. Neon green card suits consisted of the designs at the bottom of the stand.

 Shell had been born in Nevada and grew up in a casino. She enjoyed gambling, drinking, money and magic shows. She had died at age 75 in the 1970s.

 “Don’t you “Shella” me, you shady old bitch!” Shell spat, and swiped Alastra’s hand away from her shoulder. “I was about to win the whole damn pot!”

 Shell stared in anger as the stacks of money and chips on the table vanished in static.

 “Good to see you too!” added Alastra.

 Shell face palmed. “What the fuck do you want with me this time?”

 Alastra grabbed hold of her, startling her so much that cards fell from her hands.

 “My friend, I am doing some charity work, so I took it upon myself to volunteer your services! I hope that’s okay.”

 Shell was taken aback. “Are you shittin’ me?!”

 “Hmm. No, I don’t think so!” Alastra replied.

 Shell shoved the Radio Demon off her, the latter casually dusting off her red sleeves. She puffed up her black and white fur in anger, her cat ears twitching. “You thought it would be some kind of big fuckin’ riot just to pull me outta nowhere? You think I’m some kinda fuckin’ clown?”

 “Maybe,” Alastra grinned.

 Audience laughter emitted from the microphone.

 “I ain’t doin’ no fuckin’ charity job,” Shell protested.

 Alastra appeared next to her, startling the cat. “Well I figured you would be the perfect face to man the front desk of this fine establishment.”

 She pointed toward the bar stand with the staff. The sound of audience clapping came from the microphone.

 “With your charming smile and welcoming energy…”

 Alastra spread the corners of Shell’s mouth upward into a demonic smile of yellow teeth. Shell frowned seconds after she let go.

 “…this job was made for you!”

 Alastra strutted over toward the bar stand, the soles of her black heels revealing red hoof prints as she walked.

 “Don’t worry, my friend,” Alastra continued, “I can make this more welcoming…if you wish.”

 With a curve of her fingers, a green bottle of cheap booze appeared on the counter.

 Shell stared with wide eyes, suddenly very thirsty. She swore she could hear the sound of a slot machine.

 “What, you think you can buy me with a wink and some cheap booze?!” She took the bottle in anger. “Well you can!”

 She immediately guzzled it down and walked away.

 “Too easy,” thought Alastra.

 By this time, Charlie, Vaggus and Angela Dust had arrived to see what the commotion was about. Vaggus rushed toward the bar, furious.

 “Hey, hey, hey, hey!” yelled the moth demon. “No, no bar, no alcohol. This is supposed to be a place that discourages sin! Not some kind of…brothel, sinful, lady lounge …”

 Angela lunged herself into him, knocking him to the floor.

 “Shut up! Shut! Up! We are keeping this.” She pointed at Shell with multiple gloved fingers.

 She slid up to Shell. “Hey,” she said in a flirtatious voice.

 “Go fuck yourself,” Shell deadpanned, drinking her booze.

 “Only if you watch me,” Angela retorted, with a sway of her butt and hips.

 To make matters worse for Shell, Charlie leaned in close to her, excitement and red stars in his eyes.

 “Oh my gosh! Welcome to the Happy Hotel! You are going to love it here!”

 “I lost the ability to love years ago,” Shell replied, gulping down more booze.

 Alastra walked in, an ever-present grin on her face.

 “So, what do you think?”

 Charlie ran over to her. “This is amazing!” he beamed, rubbing his cheeks. Alastra blinked rapidly in appreciation.

 “It’s okay,” Vaggus grumbled from nearby, arms crossed.

 Alastra laughed and pulled the two boys close to her. “This is going to be very entertaining!” Her laughter was mixed with old radio sounds.

 Alastra conjured fire in her hand…Charlie stared in wonder at the flames and the voodoo symbols. She pushed Vaggus aside and changed her attire.

 Alastra now wore a fancy light red flapper dress, the lower part of her black leggings showing. She wore black heels on her feet. The skirt of her dress was dark magenta in color, the lower part near the helm was a brighter shade of pinkish red. The top part of her dress was also dark magenta, her gloves red. A round dark red ladies hat was on her head, the bow around it black. The bow was decorated with little claws around it. The top part of her hat had a line of visible stitches going across it, while a few pins stuck out from it.

 She waved a finger over Charlie’s head and his outfit changed. He now wore a black and pink suit, the bow tie under his neck dark red. He wore fancy black pants and shoes, the trails of his dark pink suit visible from behind him. A black top hat was perched on his blonde head, the rim decorated with small red apple designs. Charlie stared down in amazement at his new outfit.

 Alastra began to sing as she and Charlie began to dance.

 “You have a dream

You want us to know”

 Vaggus was fuming on the ground, the red x over his left eye burning red like his face.

 Alastra bent down next to him with a laugh and a shrug.

 “And it’s so ridiculous…”

 She stood back up and picked up Charlie. “But hey kid, give it a go!”

 She tossed the surprised prince into the air before he grinned.

 Both of them landed and danced with fast steps. The wall behind them was decorated with an image of Alastra’s large claws. Everything had turned into neon colors. Thanks to Alastra’s magic, voodoo symbols and deer antlers decorated the walls.

 “Cause you’re one of a kind

A charming demon beau!”

 Alastra took Charlie’s hand and the duo slid down a slide that used to be the stairs. They landed on the ground. Alastra snapped her fingers, and everyone’s outfits changed. Angela Dust stared in disgust at a bright pink dress she was now wearing. Vaggus stared down at his dark gray suit decorated with a bright pink tie in the center. Preppy stared in happiness at his dark blue suit and matching small top hat, decorated with a white daisy. Shell sat lazily at the bar counter.

 “So let’s give these burning fools a brand new show!” Alastra sang. She snapped her fingers, saying “Take it, girls!”

 Black shadow demons appeared from a cracked hole in the floor playing jazz instruments. One of them played a trumpet, another blew into a tuba. Charlie smiled as he moved to the music, next to another shadow demon playing the drums happily. Vaggus reached out to his boyfriend but was pulled away by Alastra and into the group.

 “Ha ha!” Alastra laughed as shadow demons appeared around them, appearing to be held together with stitches. Vaggus, Angela and Shell looked terrified, but Preppy was grinning, as if he had seen this before.

 Alastra appeared beside the bar table near Shell and Angela.

 “Inside of every demon is a lost cause,” she sang some more, pulling the two girls into a hug.

 Alastra plucked Shell’s eyebrow and rubbed Angela’s hat onto her head before leaving. Angela snapped her fingers with a grin and playful brows. A grumpy Shell flipped her the bird with a middle claw.

 “But we’ll dress ‘em up for now with just a smile!”

 “Just a smile!” the spirits repeated.

 Alastra appeared behind Vaggus, who stood with his arms crossed in the spotlight. Alastra waved her microphone and a fancy top hat with peacock feathers appeared on his head. A white fox scarf appeared around his neck. Then, without warning, Alastra slapped his butt.

 Vaggus jumped into the air before throwing off the scarf and hat. He turned around in fury at the Radio Demon. “Perverted witch!” he fumed as she walked away. She strolled and danced along the lobby floor, kicking a skull as she went. Preppy swept up the bone pieces in the background.

 “And we’ll chlorinate this cesspool with some old redemption flair

And show these simpletons some proper class and style!”

 “Class and style!” sang the shadows.

 Alastra walked over to the fireplace. A horde of shadow beings walked through the gap, including a shadow version of Alastra: Artsala. (Like Rotsala, Alastor’s shadow).

 The shadow grinned a blue grin at her, before Alastra vanished the shadow with a swing of her hand.

 “Here below the ground, I’m sure your plan is sound!”

 Alastra leaned in close to Charlie, their noses almost touching. After Alastra let herself be spun around, Alastra rubbed Charlie’s cheeks before taking his arm. Vaggus stood in the background with a look of jealousy and concern. Charlie and Alastra spun around in a circle, the moment magical for both of them.

 “Could this be love?” Charlie thought. Both of them had happy smiles on their faces as they spun around. Charlie could almost see the sparkles and bubbles in the background.

 “As we spend a little time…”

 Alastra let go and prepared to finish.

 “Down at this Hazbin ho…”

 A sudden explosion cut her off. The force caused the door to blow off and fly straight into little Preppy’s face, sending him flying back. “Ow! I’m okay!” he called from the distance.

 “Madam Zmeya Fucking Dies”

 Soon the colors were back to normal and so were everyone’s outfits. The group peered out from the hole, Alastra craning her neck. The group went out onto the path and spotted a flying blimp. Madam Zmeya poked her head out from an opening in the ship, fangs bared.

 “Ha!” the snake inventor laughed. “Well, well, well, look who it is harboring the striped freak!” she called, mentioning to the white spider demon. “We meet again, Alastra!”

 Alastra merely asked with a smug look, “Do I know you?”

 Madam Zmeya’s face fell before she grew angry. “Oh yes you do!” She slithered back into her seat. “And this time I have the element of…surprise!”

 She pulled a lever and a cannon lowered to the ground.

 “I’m so evil!” she declared with maniacal laughter as the cannon fired up.

 Alastra snapped her fingers, red tendrils of smoke rising from her hand. The weapon froze in mid fire and a fiery portal opened up below the blimp. Pink smoke filled the air.

 A horde of black tendrils rose from the hole, latching onto the ship. One tentacle ripped off the cannon and threw it into another smaller portal, causing it to explode in pink smoke. One of the tentacles had already smashed a hole in the large round window.

 Madam Zmeya looked on in shock as her Egg Grls slammed against the wall (one of them read #Ouch.) One of the eggs cracked open, spilling out yellowish brains and small organs among the stains of yok. Madam Zmeya and another minion were thrown against the wall.

 “Whoa, whoa, whoa!” she screamed before she was slammed against the ceiling by a black limb.

 “Ow, that hurt!” she cried.

 Madam Zmeya screamed as she was forcefully dragged along the floor and lifted up slightly. She was held in place, surrounded by the wrapped up tendril. At once, the tendril shrunk and squeezed the helpless snake. The Egg Grls ran around frantically, screaming as black cracks appeared on the floor and walls.

 From the outside, more black tendrils were closing in. Red voodoo symbols appeared around the blimp.

 “Ede m 'sèrviteur.”

 Four horned shadowy spirits with red auras floated around, wearing toothy grins.

 The tendrils were now wrapped around the entire blimp, holding it in place like thick black vines.

 Red radio waves filled Alastra’s eyes as she curled her fingers inward. The sky vanished, replaced with red. Hovering red voodoo symbols appeared all around her as she altered the state of reality. Radio static consumed the air.

 The vines thickened and completely enclosed the blimp. The spirits swooped around it in excitement, with echoing shrieks. The aura around the tendrils glowed a fiery yellow, the same color as the portal rim.

 “Kalfu! Destriksyon pa bra nwa.”

 Alastra closed her four-fingered hand which began to glow. A red drop of blood fell from her glowing hand. The tendrils proceeded to crush the blimp. Pink rays of light shot from the center and the blimp exploded in a loud BOOM!

 Pink smoke spread everywhere as the spirits sped away. The tendrils broke into severed bloody pieces that rained down to the ground. Alastra smiled victoriously, while behind them, the group of five stared in utter terror and shock. (Save for Preppy who had a small smile on his face).

 “Well, I’m starved!” Alastra exclaimed, turning around to face the group. Who wants some jambalaya?” She spread her arms out. “My mother once showed me a wonderful recipe for jambalaya! In fact, it nearly killed her! My father almost had a heart attack from eating it, but maybe that’s because he loved it so much!”

 Alastra laughed as she led the way back to the hotel. The others followed.

“You could say the kick was straight out of Hell!” she added while laughing at her own joke. “Oh, I’m on a roll!”

 Charlie and Preppy smiled while Shell, Angela, and Vaggus looked on with concern. Preppy scurried around Alastra with a look of admiration. Angela blew Shell a kiss, which earned the druggie demon a glare from the gambler. Charlie turned to Vaggus excitedly. Vaggus reluctantly went along with Charlie’s idea, even giving him a small supporting smile. As long as Charlie was happy, then Vaggus was alright, too.

 From up above, the hotel looked like a mashed-up haunted house. An old dark train was perched on a balcony, with some monstrous faces carved in. A ship, reminiscent of the Titanic, was leaning upwards against the building as part of the structure. An old carousel served as part of the upper balcony and windows. Skull designs decorated the small windows in a row. Finally, on top of a giant yellow eye, was the sign “Happy Hotel” supported by pillars of worn wood.  

 Alastra continued, “Yes, mam’, this is the start of some real changes down here! The game is set! Now…”

 She glanced up and pointed her finger toward the sign. Pink electricity shot out and made contact with the sign.

 The sign now read “Hazbin Hotel.”

 “Stay tuned,” she finished with a low sinister laugh.

 Back at the crater, smoke took the faces of demons and rose into the air. Broken egg minions littered the ground. One minion rubbed her head. With a shaking arm, Madam Zmeya lifted herself up from the gaping hole, fangs shattered, eye swollen.

 “Now will you shoot me with your ray gun?” asked the minion.

 Madam Zmeya face-planted on the ground in response.

[inikavulpixelreviews]

Let’s Talk About Pokemon - The Fairy Type

During Gen 6, they dropped the bomb that is the Fairy type. The first type to be added to the series since Dark and Steel waaaay back in Gen 2. It felt like a long time coming, as the Dragon types had run rampant in Pokemon's metagame for nearly two whole decades and other fans were clamoring for a “Light” type. Honestly, myself included when I was a silly teenager. Though my interpretation of a Light type was a lot more literal than others, which seemed to give off the impression for the type to be more angelic themed that just straight up “something that lights up.”

In the end, I'm glad we got Fairy instead. A “holy” themed type for Pokemon would feel rather out of place to a point where Arceus itself is really pushing it. Fairy is a lot more flexible than even my literal Light type, since they aren't so bound to needing a spot on their body to glow or some such or are even bound to the “moral righteousness” of the hypothetical Light type fans have wanted. Despite its cute innocence on the surface, Fairy type has a lot more room to get darker than you'd expect.

I'm sure everyone by now is aware of myths and fairy tales being a lot darker back in the day than their modern interpretations. This is perfectly reflected in the Fairy types introduced after the type's inception, with many of them being cute on the surface but dreadfully dark in other places. Though if not that, they're at the very least a type of light-hearted tricksters. You got Mimikyu's shadowy appearance and murderous tendencies plus Tapu-Lele's surprisingly dark take on a classic Healer achetype, and even Klefki's meager trickery of stealing people's keys.

I don't think I overall have too many qualms with the Pokemon that got retconned into Fairy type either. They don't 100% fit the bill as the ones from Gen 6 and 7, but that's to be expected when you have to retroactively hand them the typing. The only line that outright doesn't feel like it fits to me is the Marill line. I'm past the point where I've finally convinced myself Granbull isn't Normal type anymore, but I can never get it out of my head that the Marills are anything other than pure Water. What's up with you guys? Seems arbitrary to hand the type out to something that's just sickeningly cute and nothing more.

The type as far as Gen 6-onwards goes, it could use a bit more variation. If it's pink and has huge adorable little eyes, it's probably Fairy. I can think of a handful of Gens 1-5 Pokemon that easily could've been part of the Fairy retcon, including Hypno, the Vanillite line, Banette, maybe even Conkeldurr since you could slightly associate the type with clowns? Perhaps maybe even Snorunt and Glalie. Or maybe I just want more Ice/Fairy types in particular. Pink with Light Blue is a nice color scheme, okay?

Top 10 Favorite Fairy Types:

Bottom 10 Least Favorite Fairy Types:

This is hard when there's so many to like. But I guess I'll narrow it down to this group of “slightly less than great” ones.

The Cutest:

The Coolest:

Yeah, see? We could still use a few more “cool” Fairies!

The Prettiest:

The Spookiest:

The Weirdest/Most Unique:

Most Inventive Use of the Type:

I still feel like this type has a ways to go to have this section one day be satisfyingly out-there. The most inventive it really gets is a surprise bulldog, a Fairy-deer-forest-spirit, and Spitzee being a really unique take on a Plague Doctor design.

FAIRY TYPE WISHLIST:

NOTE: These Type Wishlists were written out before any news on new Pokemon from Sword and Shield. The Pokemon revealed over time will not affect these wishlists. Just to present them unaltered despite spoilers and in the interest of getting the wishlist out there, and to see which items on said wishlists get fulfilled by Sword and Shield!

A Unicorn:

At least a more modern conception of a unicorn. Rapidash is kinda in-line with old-timey unicorns that were pretty much just horses that happen to have horns and some magic powers. Go full-on My Little Pony with it, I don’t care. I want an obnoxiously colorful horse.

A Gnome:

Since I've already covered elves, why not put a highlight on Gnomes? The obvious take to make would be a Grass/Fairy type given their ties to being lawn ornaments, but a gnome of any description would be hilarious to me.

A Dwarf:

This is a bit more of a variation of the Gnome wish. But given dwarf's connections with the underground, mining, and such in popular culture, it could be pulled off as a Rock/Fairy type. We need more Fairies with gruff demeanors anyway! Granbull's pretty lonely.

An Imp:

“But Matt!” I hear you possibly say. “Wouldn't an imp creature be more fitting for the Dark type?” Of course it is! But think of it this way: Imps are like the runts of demonic hordes of monsters. The tiny critters often with little bat wings and are in most cases in pop culture are just low-stakes tricksters compared to their more serious demon big brothers. It sounds and awful lot like a demonic version of a Fairy doesn't it? That's perfect for our first Dark/Fairy type!

ANYTHING Wonderland Themed:

Honestly, the old tale of Alice in Wonderland is in and of itself a treasure trove of cool monster ideas waiting to happen to where if we get anything even vaguely themed after said old story, I'd take it. But in particular...

Jabberwock:

Jabberwock is a monster within Wonderland's extended universe and has already appeared all over popular media from Final Fantasy to a number of other vaguely fantasy-themed medias. Being a rather goofy looking dragon-esque denizen of Wonderland, it's PERFECT for our first-ever Dragon/Fairy type! Or at least one that's Dragon/Fairy by default...

A Sandman:

At least I think anything dream-themed would be a fit for the Fairy type that is oddly missing at the moment. I’m surprised Munna and Musharna didn’t get retconned to Fairy either. But in the interest in representing dreams as a physical being, a sandman-based monster would be a good fit for the type. Typing-wise, I’d make it Fairy/Ground but Fairy/Psychic would work just fine as well.

A Cake:

In general I'm never not gonna get tired of any monster designed after desserts and sweets. But in particular, I'd love to see a cake creature. Maybe it gets more tiers/layers as it evolves and eventually becomes ridiculously tall and towering like an Alolan Exeggutor. Add in some candles and maybe it picks up the Fire type as well?

[Archive]

[vgbestiary]

Final Fantasy Ghosts!

It’s interesting to me to see the shapes and forms that a single idea can take depending on the artist, the setting, etc., etc. Final Fantasy, of course, is a series that spans decades! Its initial bestiary was heavily inspired by the first edition of Dungeons & Dragons -- and honestly, ‘inspired’ may be being a bit generous considering it just sort of lifted a large amount of the bestiary -- but over time its creature designs became more and more original. Let’s take a look at how the classical idea of a ‘ghost monster’ evolved over time!

The rules here: The baddy must be called ‘Ghost’ in either the English translation or original Japanese. We’re only looking at the main line series of games, so no spinoffs this time around, alas.

Final Fantasy

It’s interesting to me that instead of a spooky bed sheet ghost, the first Ghost in the series is more of a skeleton in a night robe. This wizard-looking feller appears in the Sunken Shrine, which is a water-themed dungeon that mainly has like, sharks and mermen and stuff in it. Ghosts in Final Fantasy I don’t seem to have any magical abilities, but they can hit you really hard, I guess. I don’t know what it would feel like to be hit by a ghost. I suppose that’s what their staffs are for?

Final Fantasy II

FF2 continues the trend of ghosts taking the appearance of robed skeletons, which is a new one to me. They also have some pretty sexy hair. They can suck up your HP with their swords and cast all sorts of status effects on you, like Poison (called SCOURGE in the original version, which is pretty rad) and Mini. This is a tangent, but I’m glad that, as serious as Final Fantasy tries to be sometimes, it still has goofy spells like Mini and Frog here and there. Aaaanyway, I like these guys polka-dotted capes. One must wonder if they were buried with them, or if they found some kid’s bedsheet after being resurrected and were like, ‘yeah this’ll do.’

Final Fantasy IV

These buddies are actually called ‘Evil Dreamers’ in the original Japanese, but the old SNES translation labelled them as ghosts, so here they are in this list. I like their weird electro color scheme, and the fact that they are floating spectro-heads that can spit fire at you and your buddies. Actually, I’m not sure what an ‘Evil Dreamer’ is. A ghost is an undead soul, but an Evil Dreamer is just a sleeping person whose thoughts manifest into a weird malevolent force, maybe...? Or maybe this particular fiery soul-head just dreams about evil things, and it makes him angry enough to take it out on passersby.

Final Fantasy VI

A visual throwback to the first game’s ghosts, though these guys have a plethora of magic to toss at you. They can cast the Big Three Elemental Types: Fire, Electric, AND Ice! So watch out. They’re actually passengers on FF6′s famous Phantom Train, and some of them will be your allies, but others will just attack you if you talk to them. Oh, they can also stop time! I can only hope that doesn’t mess up the train’s schedule.

Final Fantasy VII

I can’t believe it took until the PS1 to get a good old-fashioned bed sheet-style ghost. Look how lovely this thing is, too! It’s just vague enough to be obvious what it is, but its weird anatomy and creepy skeletal fingers make it genuinely scary, even in this low-poly style. These ghosties appear in the Train Graveyard, which is, to this day, still an incredibly unique location. There’s something really frightening about an area that’s just full of broken-down, busted metal with freaky undead things like this hanging about -- and in groups, no less! FF7′s ghosts can turn invisible at will and cast fire. They can also sap your HP! So watch out, again. Oh, and they can rake your flesh with their spooky red fingers. Honestly, these dudes have such a good design -- and I’m VERY happy to say that they look just as good in the remake.

Final Fantasy IX

What a unique color palette! I don’t think I’ve ever seen a navy ghost before. Its spiky grimace is really nice, too. This egg-shaped specter can use fire AND thunder spells, or it can just suck up your MP. They’re pretty early-game monsters, but I’m happy their designs are so unique regardless. One of my favorite things about the FF series is that, once it hit its stride in 3D, it really didn’t skimp on unique monster designs.

I’d also be remiss if I didn’t talk about FF9′s friendly Ghost, who has a much more traditional color scheme and a nice halo just to make sure you know he’s a buddy. He asks you for some rocks, and finding him is part of a sidequest.

Final Fantasy X

Y’know, it’s hard to find a good picture of this guy. This here shows their body well enough, but they’re supposed to have a big ‘tail’ made out of white smoke and some other ghosty, misty parts surrounding it. This concept art shows it better. Anyway! FFX’s ghosts have lots of magical abilities. Upon the aforementioned Standard Big Three JRPG Elements Fire Electric And Ice, they can also cast ‘Doom,’ which basically makes a countdown appear above a character, and when it runs out they bite the big one. I’m a BIG fan of their spindly arms and horns. And again, skeletal ghosts! I never knew skeleton ghosts were a Thing in this series, but here they are.

Final Fantasy XII

Spindly fellas, huh? Not quite a bed sheet ghost, but it still kind of takes that general shape: a vaguely humanoid pale blobby with spectral bits abound. These guys appear in the Garamsythe Waterway, which is sort of a sewer/sluice level. FF12′s bestiary gives lore for each and every monster, and the Ghosts of this game are explicitly tied to the mortal world by magic. Like, someone is intentionally keeping these guys here, and their souls hate it. The lore says that you have to free their soul to kill them, but it seems that hitting them with rulers or swords works, too. They can do the Fire Ice Electric thing, but they can also Blind you or Slow you, and when their HP gets low they will divide into several more ghosts, which makes them kind of annoying to fight. I like the eyeballs in their chest. I can’t help but wonder if the weird arrangement of their facial features and green-white color scheme is a throwback to 7′s Ghosts.

Anyway, so there’s the Ghosts of Final Fantasy. I hope you enjoyed comparing and contrasting them with me! Have a good one.

[petch-trolls]

Wigglersim Makeover Episode 1

Fix this garbage child

Ah, looks like I’ve got my work cut out for me! 

Our first lovely contender is a mutant red Sollux clone, looking pretty cute with that candy red lipstick! The clown makeup is a bit odd, but not nearly as noticeable as the bowl of Noodles Selina decided to don. To be fair though, I know nothing about fashion, so maybe ramen bowls are in now adays? 

While I adore Selina as she is, I do have a few plans for her makeover! I’m thinking of granting her psionics, but in a different color scheme. Perhaps orange and red? A nice neon color palette would be cool! The lipstick is staying of course, but I think the face-paint might put them on the culling list, and we don’t want our dear friend dying early, so we’ll wash that off! 

The hair is staying, but will be styled differently so she’ll have a more unique look. It’s ok Selina, you can still kin Sollux, we just want you to branch out a bit more! Speaking of branching out, I think a new, more suiting outfit is more than reasonable. A skirt perhaps, or maybe even a dress? I’ll have to speak with Selina to know more. Either way, I think I have enough information to get started on the makeover!

Woah, looking good so far Selina! She’s made it clear she’s not in the skirt mood tonight, so I made a ruffled top instead! She says it looks adorable, and I cannot agree more. She chose the shorts and boots for herself, and I’ve got to say, it pairs extremely well! As for her hair, we’ve agreed not to do much, and just gave her a light styling, just enough to make her feel pretty. Overall, she’s had some pretty major changes, and it looks like it’s a step in the right direction!

Here’s our gorgeous girl!! We can finally see that spirit and heart you have so much of, now that your face is clear! Selina was hesitant about adding orange to her colors, but now that she’s given it a chance, we both agree it suits her! Her horn redesign was actually suggested by Selina herself,and I couldnt be prouder of her decision to be unique! Go out and show the world what you’re capable of Selina!!! I’m rooting for you girl!

[wandloreinamerica]

The Wands of Fantastic Beasts

So this is very different from what I normally post. I hope y’all enjoy and if you agree or disagree, I would love to hear what you have to say. This post is long and very picture heavy so I will continue below the cut.

Let me say that I think most of these wands are actually well executed individually, and I think the team who designed and made these wands is very talented. That being said, some have large flaws and when seen as a collection, they feel very lazy, especially the wands from the second movie. I am aware of three other wands (Bunty’s, one labled “Auror’s wand” and a purplish wand). However, I was unable to find good pictures or other reviews online, so I was forced to exclude them. 

1) Tina’s Wand

Tina’s wand features a well-defined handle and cleanly tapered shaft. It has very plain lines, and primarily adds visual interest with the grain and mild color variation. This wand is somewhat unusual because it is not in the Art Deco style. However, this works because Tina has a no nonsense, no frills approach to life, and this wand reflects that. The simple and clean lines speak to practical mind and an appreciation of a quiet beauty, much like Tina herself.  This wand is my favorite because it really does reflect its master and its understated beauty.

2) Bernadette’s Wand

Bernadette has a pale wand with a nodular shaft/handle and an offset pommel that has been carved into a face. Frankly, this wand is great. The detailed carving and the pale color make it stand out. I have seen the face described as either a mummy’s face or a faun’s. In either case, it is a unique and somewhat bold choice that I think paid off. That being said, I personally find the face a little creepy which is why Tina’s wand is Number 1.

3) Rosier’s Wand

Vinda Rosier wields a rather neutral looking wand. The wand is a rich, dark brown wood with reddish tones that become more pronounced towards mid shaft before fading into dark brown at the tip. The wand itself is made of several elongated ovals separated by smooth dips.  While I do not like silhouette of this wand, I think the color is lovely, and I applaud the designers for not giving a dark looking wand to a dark character. 

7) Skender’s Wand

Skender’s wand has a ball pommel and a minimally tapered shaft with a thick square tip. The two sections are joined by a gold band. What really stands out on this wand is the color: the shaft is a yellowy olive with pointed black striping and the pommel is bright red. The simple design really lets the colors be the stand out feature on this wand.

8) Spielman’s Wand

Spielman has a somewhat unusual square cross section wand. The shaft is a clean black taper. This simplicity forms a sharp contrast with the detailed off-white and silver handle. The pommel is a heavy silver thing with two meander/Greek key borders. A meander is also used to decorate the small silver cross guard. The bulk of the bone/ivory(?) handle is divided into four sections by three silver bands. All of these sections have a small silver stud on each face.

This wand is very well designed. The colors complement each other, and the meander is expertly used to highlight the square cross section. I like playing with the cross sections on wands, so seeing a well-executed square one is nice. That being said, I do think some decoration on the plain shaft would balance out the rich handle.

9) Leta’s Wand

Leta uses slender black and silver wand. The handle features two wide silver bands both covered with delicate, hammered scroll work. The remainder of the handle is made of an elegant, multi strand twist. The shaft is long and quite thin, giving the wand a unique silhouette.

This wand is well designed. It is feminine and classy, but not overstated. 

10) Percival Graves’ Wand

Perceval Graves has a deceptively simple wand. The glossy black shaft is separated from the handle by a thin silver ring. The silver pommel resembles an inverted rook, and is joined to the handle by a thinner silver rod.

I think this is a well-designed wand, and while I am generally not a fan of wands with lots of metal, I think it works in this case. Part of this comes from the wand echoing some of the more futuristic Art Deco schools, and part come from the black and silver color scheme. In the first series black and silver wands were rare, so this wand stood out because of the unusual colors. However, black and silver wands have become more common and robbed this wand of some of its uniqueness.

11) Abernathy’s Wand

Abernathy’s wand features a black handle with an asymmetric spiral and a large ¾ ball pommel. A silver band separates the handle from the plain, medium brown shaft.

I think this is serviceable wand. I like the asymmetrical twist, and think it goes nicely with the pommel. However, while the colors do complement each other, the shaft is very plain, and almost looks like it was made from a different material from the handle, though it is possible that the handle was painted.

12) Yusuf Kama’s Wand

Yusuf Kama’s wand shares a similar color palette with Abernathy’s: the shaft is slightly darker and there is a touch more silver. The additional silver comes in the form of a broad pommel cap that has a slightly pitted finish. From here, the wand flows into a slim handle with two raised rings marking the middle. The silver cross guard slightly tapers to the shaft. While most lines on this wand (the grooves, rings and color transitions) run perpendicular to the wand, the cross guard has some delicate fluting that lies parallel to the wand. While subtle, this does serve to make that element the focal point of the wand.

I like the fluting on the cross guard, and overall, think the wand is generally fine, even if the shaft is a tad plain.

13) Theseus’s Wand

Theseus Scamander’s wand has a simple, gently tapered silhouette, and a plain warm toned wooden shaft. The shaft contrasts nicely with the rich gold and tortoise shell handle.

I like the similarities in the Scamander brother’s wands: both are simple baton style with shell accents. In Theseus’ case the similarities have all been polished and the wand looks like it belongs to a member of the British upper class. That being said, this wand really does feel like a non-wood handle was added to the wand.

14) Newt’s Wand

Newt’s wand is a simple baton, with a rustic, well used finish. The darker handle is separated from the shaft by a blueish band. The wand has a hollow pommel lined with mother of pearl.

I do not like the hollow pommel, as that is a weak spot, susceptible to breaking, and it will get filled with dirt, water, and other debris. I know that the designers wanted a natural look, with animal elements, but I think they tried too hard and it shows.

15) Queenie’s Wand

Queenie’s is mostly a slim black shaft. The visual interesting parts are located in the elongated two-part pommel. The first part is bright gold, miter-eques band that is decorated with an incised banner pattern. The band grips a mother of pearl column which cumulates in a delicate shell. When seen in a void, this wand is incredibly Art Deco, both in materials and motifs.

I have read that this wand was supposed to be “sexy”, but I personally don’t see it. I question the inclusion of that much shell, which would be fragile and likely to break (although if this is painted wood, I applaud the skill that went into the carving and painting.). I also think too much emphasis is put in the pommel/handle to the detriment of the shaft. Part of Art Deco is showing of the richness, and if in every day use all you can see it the very plain shaft, it kind of fails as an Art Deco piece.

16) Flamel’s Wand

Flamel uses a very plain brown wand. Much like Queenie’s, the plain shaft makes up most of the wand. The handle/pommel is made from a slightly curved horn. The horn is joined to the shaft by an aged gold band that has a slightly raised, swirling pattern. I am very, very, disappointed with this design. Flamel is ancient and you would think his wand would have a radically different look. Instead with the very plain shaft and fancy handle, this wand fits in with the modern wands in the rest of the collection. I would expect this wand to have significant gothic influence, with intricate, allegorical scenes, lots of fine details, and, possibly, painted areas to mimic stained glass.

17) Albus Dumbledore’s Wand

Dumbledore uses a black and silver wand. It features a broadly flared silver pommel that flows into the black handle. The handle is joined to the shaft by a broad silver band etched with runes. Just distal to this band is a delicate three-part hollow twist, smooth in the outside, yet rough on the inside. This then blends smoothly into the rest of the shaft.  This wand is visually interesting. But I have serious issues with the hollow twist. The location is where you would expect the most stress to be if you hit something while holding the wand, and with that area weakened, where you would expect the wand to snap. Additionally, how does the core run through that section?

18) Seraphina Picquery’s Wand

Seraphina uses a wand with a large amethyst crystal handle that draws most of the attention. The crystal is griped by a delicate silver cage which joins it to the shaft. The wood shaft is a very simple dark brown baton. Overall the color plate work’s well, and the silver cages serves as a textural focus point, with both the crystal and wood having almost no texture.  

While this wand does preserve the Art Deco feel, the large crystal looks like it belongs on a high fantasy fairy wand or a Wiccan wand rather than a Harry Potter wand. Additionally, the crystal is clearly grafted onto wood shaft, which raises questions about how the wand was originally constructed. Were the crystal and silver handle originally part of the wand? If so what was the cost of the wand? Was it added later, and how did that change the balance of the wand? To my mind, this wand is the epitome of an overly extravagant, inorganic handle grafted onto a very, very plain wooden shaft.

Overall thoughts:

Let me be clear, I think the props designers are fantastically talented, and by and large most of these wands are individually very well done. And there are some fantastic wands and some really awful ones. However, when you look at the overall collection it feels…lazy and over decorated.

Art Deco was clearly a major inspiration for the wands. I have also read that the design team wanted to go in a different direction, and separate these wands from those in the original series. And I think both ideas are good: it’s a different time, and Art Deco really is big at this point. But I think they got too wrapped up in the new, Art Deco direction and failed to adhere to the basics, both in wand design and in Art Deco.

 Too many of the wands look like they are plain batons grafted onto decorative handles. While there is nothing wrong with having a plain shaft, and most wands will have a plain shaft, here it is taken to an extreme.  Queenie, Picquery, Theseus, Speilman, Leta, and to a lesser extent Flamel, all have very rich, extremely detailed handles, that often seem to be made of non-wood materials. These handles stand in stark contrast to the shafts, all of which are very plain, and few have any notable grain. This contrast sharply with the books, in which wands are wood and the original series, where non wood accents are used sparingly. These new wands with their large non wood sections are a substantial reversal from the wood wands of both movie and book cannon. Secondly, as I noted for Queenie’s wand, part of Art Deco is showing off the rich exotic materials you are using. While these wands undoubtably have such materials used in their construction, they are exclusively confined to the handle which is covered in normal use. This means what you see most of the time, is a plain shaft, which really isn’t Art Deco.

The color palate is somewhat condensed, and this detrimental the Art Deco theme. A third of the wands use black and silver. This combination is very classy and elegant, but it is overdone. Before black and silver wands were unique, and stood out: now it is common, and slightly cheap. Wood comes in a staggering array of colors, and this collection does not reflect that. There are a myriad shades of brown, cream, tan and colors beyond that too. There is Padauk, Redheart, Redwood, Bloodwood, (all varying shades of red) Canarywood (gold and brown striped), Yellowheart (bright yellow), Osage Orange (orange), Purpleheart (purple), Pink Ivory (ranges from a pale pink to watermelon red), Lignum Vitae and Sassafras (both are often an olive green), and Holly (one of, if not the, whitest wood). And then there is grain. Black and White ebony is noted for its striking black and white stripping. Ziricote is valued for it’s beautiful landscape like grain, and the cream and chocolate stripping of zebra wood is always stunning. Spalting adds unique patterns and colors, while figured grain is not uncommon and can and an extra bit of oomph to another wise simple design. Using some of the above mentioned could have contributed that richness in the Art Deco style and added more variation.

There is also a huge missed opportunity here to show how different countries and wandmakers have different styles. There are American, British, German, and French wands here, but there is no real difference in the style, with the exception of Bernadette’s. We get a glimpse of this in the original series, with both Gregorovitch wands having a strong organic aesthetic (one can also include Grindelwald’s original wand in this group, as he appears to come from the same region).  Unfortunately, this does not carry over into this series.

 Sources:

http://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0221/1146/products/Porpentina_Goldstein_Collectable_Wand_2_grande.png?v=1532942253

https://ae01.alicdn.com/kf/HTB12FqqSVXXXXXEXVXXq6xXFXXXY/Newest-Metal-Core-Deluxe-Harry-Potter-Fantestic-Where-to-find-Bernadette-Magic-Wands-Stick-with-Gift.jpg_640x640.jpg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CpBiah84Xy4&t=429s (a very different take on these wands, that I would suggest watching, to get another view point)

http://www.thedailyowl.gr/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/vinda-rosier-wand.jpg

https://www.wbshop.com/collections/fantastic-beasts-wands

https://www.noblecollection.com/Fantastic-Beasts-Wands