#the girl who (admittedly not her fault but) made me this way

[ghosts-to-reid]

Blues, Baby.

Warnings: 18+ MDNI, Breeding kink, kidnapping, smut

Request: Breeding kink smut pleaseeee (Spencer wanting to get reader pregnant)

Summary: Spencer is angry at you after you made a silly mistake on the field. He comes to you to reconcile, but ends up doing that and more.

It had been a long week.

The case had been difficult, you had been taken by the unsub, and on top of that, you and Spencer had had an argument. You had been together for 4 years, you rarely argued in all that time, but when you did it was brutal. 

The argument happened after he had saved you. It was your fault, admittedly you were too eager to catch this guy, you could say that now. He had taken over 34 girls in the last 20 years, from all over the states. He had been a copycat of Israel Keyes, stashing kill kits in the same, or as close as he could to, locations as him. It was shocking that it hadn’t been caught years ago. It hit you hard, and you were determined to catch this guy. So, you had rushed in without backup, getting yourself caught in the process. Though your capture was short- Which gave way to Spencer’s fury at your actions

“What the HELL were you thinking?” You had just finished up being checked over by the medics, sitting on the back of the ambulance, when Spencer rushed over to you. He is the one who took down the unsub, taking him in before he spoke to you. His reaction caught you off guard, and then made you scowl.

“What are you talking about?” He was standing in front of you now, arms crossed. His eyes  were boring into yours. He huffed out a frustrated chuckle

“What am I talking about? I'm talking about you rushing in there, without backup, and nearly getting yourself killed in the process!” He waved his arms as he spoke, as he usually did when frustrated. Shaking your head, you stood and stepped closer to him, eyes never leaving him.

“I am perfectly capable of taking care of myself, Spencer. You know this. What is wrong with you?” You were confused why he was so angry with you, you were the one who had just been kidnapped, he should be holding you and soothing you, not shouting at you in front of your team and the locals. 

“Obviously not when you make stupid decisions like this! Did you even think about the consequences?”

“The consequence if I hadn’t gone in was another dead girl!”

“But you didn’t have to try and replace her! God, I knew I should've gone with you!”

“What, you think you need to babysit me, Spencer?” You scoff, folding your arms “You’re my boyfriend, not my dad.”

“You know what, maybe you do need a babysitter if you’re going to continue making rookie mistakes like this, you know you’re better than this” 

Your eyes had never left each other, staring each other down- Waiting for the other to back down. Bored of this, you rolled your eyes and dropped your arms from your chest. Removing the blanket from your shoulders, you move to walk away when he grabs your arm, tight enough to stop you, but not enough to hurt.

“Where the hell are you going?” His free hand picked up the blanket and he began to drape it over your shoulders once more “You need this for shock. Why won’t you take care of yourself?” It was obvious his anger was rooted in concern, but you didn’t want to confront that right now. Already fuming at his actions, you had no time for his niceties right now.

“Just- Leave me alone. I don’t need you shouting at me right now.” Shaking free from his grasp, you stomped away from him and towards one of the team's SUVs. He shouted something after you, and you heard a loud bang as he hit the ambulance in frustration, but you ignored it.

Since then, the two of you had barely spoken since. Spencer sat with Derek, and you sat with Emily both on opposite sides of the Jet. The team sensed some tension, having witnessed the argument, but no one pressed you. Then, there was a silent car ride back to your shared apartment. You moved into his place 9 months ago now, Spencer had suggested it after your lease had ended, explaining how it was logical to move in together now and save money- he said he wanted to marry you someday and that this was a good start. 

That seemed a silly thought at the minute, though.

The silence continued until dinner. He was in the shower whilst you prepped what you could from your fridge, it was too late to go to the grocery store and you had been away a few days, so it wasn’t much. You were so deep in your own thoughts you didn’t hear the shower stop, or Spencer enter the kitchen. He had stood, watching you silently for a moment as you chopped something, before he moved to slide his hands to hold your waist, snaking them to hold you as he rested his head on your shoulder. Momentarily, you tensed, but soon melted into him. He felt warm and safe, and you had needed this after your capture.

“I'm sorry…” He mumbled into your hair as he squeezed you. You dropped the knife you were holding and brought your hand up to his damp hair, scratching his scalp lightly.

“I'm sorry too, baby…” You mumbled, he moved and turned you to look at him. His eyes were sad, brow furrowed with concern.

"I just... I don't want to loose you, okay?"

"You won't, baby. I'm here." You snaked your arms around his neck and placed your forehead against his.

"Today just... It made me realise we shouldn't wait for things. I was so worried that... That we wouldn't be able to do all the things we planned... That we'd never get married, have kids... I just... I don't want to miss out on that with you. I love you too much." His eyes were closed as he made his confession. Sighing you softly nodded your head against his.

"Then... Why are we waiting?" You asked, voice small as his eyes flicker open, meeting yours once more. T5here is stillness in the air as he stares at you. "Let's have a baby..."

He wasted no time in dipping to kiss you. His lips melting softly into yours as an apology. Smiling into the kiss, you hummed contentedly as he pulled you closer, and you brought your hands up once more to play with his curls. 

The kiss began to become more desperate when you lightly tugged at his hair, causing him to groan into your lips. You smirked as his grip on your hips tightened and his tongue slipped past your lips. The kiss deepened into a battle for dominance between you, lips fighting one another to be the winner. Slowly, Spencer backed you against a clear counter, surprising you when your back hit the cold marble. Your yelp made Spencer smirk as he finally pulled away from you. He had caged you between him and the counter, arms tasting either side. He admired his work, your flushed skin, wide eyes, pupils blown out with lust. You were panting for air through your swollen lips and he could feel all his blood rushing to one single point. All his frustration from before turned to need. Need to show you how much he cares, how much he loves you, how you were his, and his alone. His lips soon darted to your neck, kissing and sucking his way down to your collarbone. You whined under his touch, feeling his growing cock rub against you. It made you squirm in anticipation, you could feel yourself getting wetter and wetter with every touch.

“Spence…” You gasp as his fingers begin to dip under your waist band. He leaned back, watching you as he began to guide his fingers through your folds, gathering your slick and occasionally skimming over your clit teasingly. You were an utter mess for him, and he loved it. He observed you for a moment, simply watching your reactions to his touch, your moans and curses under your breath, the way you held onto his arm, the pout you gave him when he dodged your kiss, smirking at you as he just watched and touched.

“I amso sorry about what happened before, baby… I just didn’t want to lose you” His voice was soft but had an edge of authority that made you clench around nothing. His eyes never left yours as he spoke, just like earlier “Because you’re mine, aren’t you? You belong to me, don’t you?” He continued his agonizingly slow strokes as he spoke, you whined and nodded in response. He simply tutted and shook his head

“Use your words, darling.”

“I-I’m yours, Spencer.” You managed to whisper, voice shaky from the frustrated pleasure you were receiving. Spencer smiled proudly, and sped up slightly, causing you to moan loudly.

“Hmm… I think we need to do something to show everyone else who you belong to…” His voice was teasing. The free hand that caged you lifted to your face, landing softly on your cheek. His other hand continued to work at a steady pace, enough to make you needy, but not enough to push you over the edge anytime soon. He loved to torture you like this, teasing you for hours and not letting you cum. He loved feeling the control over you. Your eyes opened and met his confusion hidden in them. He found it, and found it amusing. He leaned closer into you, his free hand moving to tuck your hair behind your ear before he firmly held the back of your hair. Whispering softly

“I'm gonna put a baby in you, hm? Show everyone who you really belong to, who gets to cum inside you?” 

As he finished speaking, he plunged two fingers inside of your pussy. A loud moan escaped your lips as he pulled your head back to look at him. He had sped up now, fingering you with a cocky smirk. He may be shy in the real world, but behind closed doors, he undoubtedly enjoyed his power over you. His words shocked you at first, but he didn’t miss the way you clenched around his fingers as he fucked you with them. He knew you’d do whatever he wanted to, but this was pushing the limits.

Usually, no matter the scenario, you and Spencer had sex with a condom. You had gone off of birth control, the effects had been killer for you. Spencer, being the loving boyfriend he is, had supported you through this, and your sex life had adjusted with no problem. He used condoms, and the rare occasion you would do it without one, he’d take you for the morning after pill, but now? Now, he wanted to prove a point. 

It wasn’t just about where he came, it was about showing everyone who you belonged to. Who cared for you, who protected you, who you came home to every night.

“What do you say baby? Do you want me to fuck you till everyone knows who you belong to?” Another devious whisper in your ear. You eagerly nodded, Spencer wasted no time in removing his hand from inside you and pulling your pants down your thighs. He roughly turned you around and bent you over the counter, holding both your wrists behind your back. He stepped back, admiring how you looked from behind. You could feel his free hand tracing your skin before feeling a sharp smack to your ass. The pain made you hiss out a moan, you missed Spencer pulling down his sweatpants.

It shocked you momentarily when you felt the tip of his cock move between your folds, teasing your clit as he covered his shaft in your slick. The anticipation of him entering you was killing you, and you bucked your hips against him.

“Eager, are we? You want me to cum inside you that bad?” The edge of teasing was still present in his voice as he held you down. All you could do was whine and squirm under him, waiting for him to enter you. He chuckled before he pushed himself inside of you, groaning as your tight walls stretched around him.

“Fuck…” He muttered as he watched you moan once more. He loved seeing you so submissive under him. He barely waited for you to adjust until he started fucking into you at a rough pace.

Each stroke was bliss, pain turned to pleasure quickly as he relentlessly bottomed out over and over again. He let your wrists go as he held your hips, holding them firmly in place. YOu gripped the edge of the counter tightly in an effort to keep upright.

Spencer watched how he disappeared inside you, moaning as he felt you begin to tighten around him

“Awe, you gonna cum for me, baby? Is that how excited you are for me to cum?” He panted into your ear, you nodded quickly, nearly drooling from the pleasure Spencer was giving you. You let out a loud whine when Spencers hand reached between you both and began to play with your clit.

“Im- Im gonna-” You tried to pant out words that dissipated into moans, Spencer soothed you momentarily before quickening his pace.

“Cum for me, baby. I'm close too, gonna make you a mommy… Gonna fill you up so much.” He was struggling to speak properly now, his strokes were becoming more and more aggressive as he reached his own peak. His words were enough to push you over, with a loud cry you came around his cock, clenching around him as your legs began to shake. You whined his name out, as he groaned again, this time with one last big stroke.

You felt him cum inside you, his cum painting your insides white. As he came, he fucked back into you a few more times sloppily, before leaning forward to kiss your back lightly. When he finally pulled out, your legs almost gave way, your grip on the counter keeping you steady. Spencer huffed a small laugh as he observed you, his eyes moved down to the glistening mess between your legs, he saw his cum beginning to leak out of you. He moved forward once more, steading you with one hand, whilst the other moved between your legs once again, gathering his cum and pushing it back into you, once more fucking you with his fingers. Another loud moan escaped your lips as he did this. You moved your head to the side to look at him, only to be met with a cock grin as he leaned forward 

“Just one more” He breathed, you were still coming down from your last high, so it didn’t take much for you to cum around his fingers once more. Once he was happy, he pulled up your pants, keeping his cum from dripping out of you. He carried you to your shared bedroom before dressing you in your pajamas, careful to keep your underwear on, and joined you in bed. He held you tightly as you snuggled into his chest.

“So… Can I clean myself up now?” You mumbled into his chest, giggling a little bit.

“Well, your chances of pregnancy increase the longer you keep sperm inside. Sperm can stay alive for up to 5 days in the body, but the best way to get pregnant is regular sex, usually every other night around the time you’re ovulating.” Spencer recited the random facts as casually as ever, but it made you jump slightly, you pulled back and sat up.

“Wait… are we ready for this?” You asked timidly, unsure of his answer. Spencer’s eyes met yours and looked fearful for a moment

“Well… We’ve been together for 4 years… I thought it through, and after today especially, I just want to start my life with you as soon as possible… But if you’re not ready we can go get a plan B tomorrow. I guess i got carried away and just went for it We can discuss this more-” You interrupted his amble with a kiss, soft and small.When you pulled back he was confused, cocking a brow at you now. 

“I’d love to start a family with you Spencer… Just, it's a bit nerve wracking.” You giggle. He flushes for a moment, hiding his face in the pillow.

“I'm sorry.” You hear, muffled by the pillow. You laugh lightly as you move him to face you again, giving him another soft kiss.

“But seriously, We have all the time in the world to get me pregnant. I'm gonna go shower.”

[tgcg]

ill break your shit adam

warning for adult lang

fuck you adam sandler

youre lucky karkat likes you

stupid fuck sees an amnesiac girl

and asks her can i marry you

that lady got issues mentally

you still down to do shit anally

deplorable zit on the ass of romanza

karkat told me to put that shit in this stanza

do raps even count as having stanzas

slam poetry tyke at preschool im no manza

youd probably jack it to a log with holes if they were wet ones

sitting on that stupid dock with her papa cracking cold ones

piece of shit id push you off that dock and watch you bubbling

kick your ass like her shitty bro failed when you were troubling

penguins dont quack like fucking ducks you dumbass

thats not part of the rap i just think that youre a dumbass

back to the rap sandler i bet you couldnt drop a single bar

too busy picking up stupid women at the stupid women bar

who even let you into hawaii

also did i say karkat liked you i was kidding he wants to kick your heinie

seriously watching that shit again made him start slamming his head into the cushions and screaming i had to pry them out his hands and he almost bit me

sorry i forgot i was rapping again

piece of shit forgot that you can like women while dating other men

still not over that chuck and larry shit adam

if you just said to the gov you were bi you coulda had em

firefighter of the year? well try putting out this heat

karkats gonna beat your ass like you do every night to your meat

gotta ask is this shit wish fulfilment for you

gotta say larry deserved better than you

i could treat him way better than you not in a gay way though

i just mean youre a massive sleaze basically the worlds shittiest bro

back to 50 first dates man sandler your shit is a bore

the stupid bits with schneider got my ass addicted to snore

if i was that stupid walrus id tear your ass to shreds

if i was that penguin i would also tear your ass to shreds

itd be harder but id still do it

bro fuck adam sandler im through it

===

TT: Wow. Bravo, Dave. You've outdone yourself.

TG: i wrote this one exceptionally fucking terrible to represent my inner darkness

TG: i can never unwatch those cinematic fossilized turds theyre like time capsules devoted to everything wrong with america

TG: you dont even understand how egregious that was

TT: I can sense the utter malaise and contempt in every word. It's beautiful.

TT: One particularly interesting point I'd like to make is the fact that you managed to refer to butts in a song about a male target, 10 times in the span of 37 lines. It's not an exorbitant amount, but it appears to be a running theme in your works. Very interesting, if you ask me --

TG: nooooo

TG: nope no

TG: not this shit again

TG: listen one of them is karkats fault

===

CG: ROSE, YOU JUST DON'T FUCKING UNDERSTAND WHAT HE'S DOING HERE AT ALL.

TT: No? Please, enlighten me Karkat.

CG: GLADLY.

CG: HE STARTS OUT WITH THE FRIGGIN WORD "ANAL" PRECEDING ALL OF THE OTHER MENTIONS, OF COURSE IT'S ON PURPOSE. IT INSTILLS THAT IMAGERY IN YOUR NUGBONE THROUGHOUT THE TRACK.

CG: AND YOU MAY HAVE NOTICED A RECURRING USE OF THE WORD "SHIT", IN TANDEM. BOG-STANDARD FOR DAVE, RIGHT? NO! IT'S PART OF THE EFFECT!

CG: MY THESIS: ADAM SANDLER MOVIES ARE PIECES OF ABSOLUTE SHIT AND THE REFERENCES TO WORDS LIKE "LOG" AND "SHIT" AND "ASS" ARE TO INVOKE THE SENSE OF TAKING A MASSIVE DUMP THROUGHOUT THE SPAN OF THE RAP, WHICH BY ALL MEANS WOULD BE AN EQUAL OR GREATER USE OF YOUR TIME THAN WATCHING THOSE MOVIES.

CG: RIGHT, DAVE?

TG: … yeah

TT: Okay, I'm willing to concede to that. On this subject matter, as an avid terrible movie enjoyer, you admittedly know better than myself.

CG: SHOULD KNOW BETTER.

TT: And you love them anyways.

CG: YEAH.

TG: hes right

TG: you hear that shit hes right

TG: fuck death of the author im verifying that interpretation

[stevie-petey]

heyy i know you prob need to write chap 3 (btw cjapter 2 wa sso well written as usual), can i req a blurb? maybe one where he cheers bug up after a bad day or some fluff of steve, bug n robin

since chap 4 was so ,,,, dark, heres some fluffy steve rob n bug <333

enjoy !

"im legally owed time with y/n."

"jesus!" steve nearly drops the stack of movies hes precariously balancing in his arms. he didnt hear robin come in, she isn't even supposed to be working today.

robin slides on top of the counter and stacks yet another movie onto steves already too large pile. "hey, did you hear me?"

"why are you here right now?"

"because im legally owed time with y/n."

"what does that even mean?"

"that im legally owed time with y/n."

steve nearly throws the movies hes holding in robins face. shes been here for not even a minute and he already wants to strangle her. he loves the girl, shes his best friend, but steve forgets how infuriating robin can be when she wants something.

angrily setting down the stack, steve pinches the bridge of his nose and faces robin. "alright, what the hell are you talking about?"

she stares at him. "i am owed. time with. y/n... legally."

"robin, i swear to god-"

"why are we swearing at robin?" you appear from the breakroom, carrying a few rentals in your arms. stopping next to steve, you hand them to him with a smile. "i found the rest of keiths stash. he has a very weird obsession with molly ringwald."

"y/n!" robin throws her arms over you and hugs you fiercely.

you squeak in alarm, though you allow your body to rest against hers. while youre always happy to see her, youre confused by robins sudden affection. "um. hi?"

"im legally owed time with you."

steve covers his hand with his hands and groans obnoxiously loud, but you simply laugh and nod eagerly at robin. "oh, i absolutely agree."

"you actually understand what shes saying?" steve looks at you incredulously. he cant believe it. youre actually going along with robins weird new scheme.

you roll your eyes at your boyfriend. "i mean, isnt it obvious?"

"yeah, harrington. its pretty clear, like crystal." robin butts in, shoving her hip against steves, effectively pushing him away from you so that shes the one now next to you.

"robin is legally owed time with me, so of course i have to abide by the law." you shiver slightly. "crime scares me."

it sickens steve how in love he is with you sometimes, and it sickens him even more that he finds you painfully adorable in this very moment. shuddering at the idea of crime, abiding by robins made up laws in a way that makes his heart twist.

"i'll be sure to never let you anywhere near crime then, angel." steve laughs fondly, pressing a quick kiss to your forehead.

robin gags and you giggle. "thanks, honey. does that mean youll let me go spend some legally obligated time with robin today?"

"but-"

"you hog her all the time!" robin steps between you again and she glares at steve. "i mean, i get it. youre in love and whatever, but y/n is my girlfriend, too."

you blink. "i am?"

not that youre upset about it, but it wouldve been nice to know sooner.

"i had her first!" steve scoffs. "and i dont hog her, i simply am always with her. theres a difference."

robin flicks him. "is the difference the chemicals imbalance in your brain from all that stupid hairspray?"

"okay, i do not use that much hairspray-"

"what happened to not letting me anywhere near crime?" you poke steves chest, pouting slightly. admittedly, you have been slightly distant from robin lately. not that its anyones fault, shes just been busy with band and you with the party and college applications. still, you know she misses you, and you miss her. "im sure you can survive one day without me, steve."

"no i cant."

robin gags again. "youre pathetic."

"youre the one who insisting youre legally owed time with y/n!"

"because i am!"

"hey!" you clap your hands, the sound loud enough to break up whatever quarrel is happening between steve and robin. "im right here, you know."

robin grabs your hand and pulls you away from steve. "and now youre leaving with me."

"oh, alright." you dont do much to fight her, allowing her to drag you towards family videos front door. "i was going to go willingly, but this works too."

"y/n!" steve shouts halfheartedly. he knows hes lost, but he doesnt mind. secretly, he loves how close you and robin are. he also recognizes how little time youve spent together, and he cant help but feel a little guilty about it.

you wave briskly at him, giggling under your breath. "call me tonight?"

"always."

"i love you!"

steve laughs. "i love you, too." then, just before the door closes and you and robin disappear, he calls out, "bring our girlfriend back in one piece, buckley!"

"make me!"

and with that, the door swings shut and the sound of your laughter lingers in the store.

steve smiles softly, the warmth of your presence enough to ignite his chest. he'll miss you today, but he knows that tonight itll just be you and him. no one else.

and thats enough for steve.

until he turns around and remembers the giant fucking pile of movies he still has to restack.

"fuck my life."

[spaceshipellie]

hear me out, ellie, “is there someone who has your heart, that keeps you gone, away from me?”, angry confessions in the rain, modern or tlou au, angst and smut if you want. (i really am just fiening for a heated confession LOL)

“is there someone who has your heart, that keeps you gone, away from me?”

pairing: ellie x reader

summary/warnings: you’ve been dating ellie and everything’s been great, until you suspect she might be involved with someone else and have to confront her. angst. cheating. modern au. mdni

i hope this was heated enough! i’ve been writing a lot of angsty personal shit lately so needed to write an angsty request whilst it’s still in my system lol

being with ellie had always felt like the sun was kissing your skin with smiling lips. like when you first step into a pool and at first the coolness nips at your skin and you’re unsure if you want to go any further but once you allow yourself to be completely submerged, it feels delicious.

you hadn’t had the best of luck with relationships in the past which admittedly made it easy for you to get anxious. the sickening cold rush that travels up through your body, debilitating any move you try and make, was one you felt often and you hated it about yourself. not that it was your fault but you couldn’t help but beat yourself up about it.

ellie knew this and had always gone out of her way to make you feel good. she showered you with reminders about how beautiful and funny and smart you are, how lucky she is to have you, how she never wants to make you feel bad and if she ever does you’re to tell her so she can fix it.

you had nodded your teary face when she had told you this, a weak smile on your lips preparing an apology for getting emotional. you always felt embarrassed crying in front of people, especially people who you were dating. but ellie had held your hands, wiped the tears from your cheeks with delicate touches and kissed them before kissing you like you were her everything.

it was a saturday night and you were lying in her bed, naked, breathless and completely fucked out. she was lying with her face smushed in your neck, a hand comfortingly holding your boob and a cosy smile on her face letting out tiny satisfied sighs. she then reluctantly climbed off of you to go to the bathroom when your phone dinged on the bedside table. you rolled over to grab it but not before seeing a message light up on her phone which was right beside yours, reading:

ava

god i literally adore you

that familiar cold rush creeped up your body and your face went hot. that word, adore, was jabbing your mind. maybe if you knew who this person was you would understand the context of the message but you had no idea. ellie came back in the bedroom then and you quickly shuffled as if you were just getting comfortable. she didn’t seem to pick up on anything as she slid in behind you, wrapping an arm around you and kissing your shoulder.

you held her close, as if it was tricking your brain into believing it would keep her there. that hugging her tightly meant she was yours and couldn’t possibly be someone else’s too. you turned in her arms and glanced down at her closed eyes with her pretty lashes and freckles scattered like a painting. she was so beautiful it made you want to cry. but you suddenly felt like an imposter being here with her, naked in bed. so intimate yet so detached. what if another girl had been in here with her recently? holding her like this with her hand trailing soft lines up and down their arm, fucking her like you just had, making her cum on their tongue whilst she tells them how good they make her feel, giggling and exchanging i love you’s when it’s over. no, she wasn’t like the others. she couldn’t be.

you had pushed the thoughts so far back you had nearly forgotten about them several days later, until a girl drunkenly waddled up to you at the bar you were at with your friends. she touched your forearm to get your attention and hiccuped when she giggled, her eyes struggling to keep contact with yours.

“oh my god, are you ellie’s girlfriend?”

you looked at her, confused.

“yeah? i am, why?”

“oh,” she laughed again, her friends now catching up to her and snickering. “no reason.”

okay, what the fuck? your body suddenly felt too heavy to hold up as you leant further against the bar.

“who are you?” you asked but her friends had already started to drag her away. however, the blood drained from your face when you heard one of them say “ava, come on.”

i adore you. it screamed in your head like a banshee. you needed to speak to ellie. you made an excuse up for your friends and cursed when you walked outside into the pouring rain. hugging your jean jacket around you tightly you marched in the direction of ellie’s apartment, deciding to call her on the way.

“hello?”

“hi, i need to talk to you.”

“sure, what’s wrong? are you still out?”

“i just left. ellie i– please say you’re at home.”

“i’m not.” your heart sunk. “i’m at jesse’s but i can walk back right now if you need me to.”

“please. i really need to talk to you.”

“okay, babe. see you in a bit.”

you were drenched at this point. your hair was sticking to your face and your jacket felt heavy. you hadn’t quite made it to ellie’s street yet when you suddenly saw her walking over the road. you called her name and she spotted you, immediately checking for cars quickly as she jogged over.

“baby, what’s going on? why are you by yourself?”

“who’s ava?” you’d hoped you could be more chill about the situation but the little bit of alcohol you’d already had had made you lose all hope of that.

“what?”

“ava, ellie. some girl i know you’ve been talking to.”

she stared back at you. her face scrunched slightly due to being pelted by rain drops.

“what are you talking about?”

“don’t do this right now,” you sighed, “this girl came up to me giggling and asked if i was your girlfriend and i’m sorry but i saw you had a text from her a week or so ago so, explain.”

you wiped your cheeks as if that would get rid of any of the rain droplets and folded your arms across your chest. her face looked forlorn and concerned.

“how do you know that girl was av–“

“because i heard her name! fuck, is that really what you wanna say first?”

“no, sorry.” she looked down at her feet and didn’t follow up with anything.

“ellie! tell me what the fuck is going on!”

“nothing! it’s not like that.”

“what does that even mean? just be fucking honest, please.”

“we just talked, i swear. nothing happened.”

“talked about what?”

“i don’t know, stuff. fuck.”

“stuff.. hmm. like what, like how much she adores you?”

her eyes shifted to look away from you.

“i saw the text. promise i wasn’t snooping but maybe you should be more careful about your phone next time you decide to fuck around with another girl.” your voice was bitter and she looked like she was struggling to find the words.

“that, that text– fuck. okay. i fucked up. i slept with her once and i regret it entirely.”

you squeezed your eyes shut, desperately trying not to keep it together in front of her.

“when?”

“like, two weeks ago.”

you paused for a moment to relive the past two weeks in your head. all the touches, late nights, texts, kisses, photos, words, all tarnished by the fact that her attention had been shared with another girl.

“why? how?”

“honestly, i don’t know.”

“well think.”

“i–i met her at a party. i messed up, i wasn’t thinking.”

“is that the best you can do?”

“what do you want me to say?!” her voice was raised now, leaving you both in a bit of a screaming match.

“what is wrong with you? i thought everything was fine. what the fuck did i do?”

“nothing! i just– i don’t know what to fucking say other than i’m sorry and i’ve blocked her already. it’s not going to happen again.”

“oh, you’re so considerate,” you snapped sarcastically.

“tell me how i can fix it.”

“i’m not sure, ellie. i think i need to go home.”

“please don’t.”

“i can’t do this.”

she tried to reach for your hand but you slipped away and walked quickly back to your apartment, not daring to look back at her. halfway through the drenched walk you realised you could have called an uber but you just needed to get away and the adrenaline was carrying your legs too fast.

you had no idea what you were going to do. the sound of ellie’s laugh when she danced with you in the kitchen and ava’s smug giggle when she approached you fought for centre stage in your head. you closed your eyes, praying that when you opened them it would all have just been a huge nightmare, but it wasn’t. ellie had hurt you, just like the ones before.

[archivalofsins]

During the break in Milgram content I've mostly been relaxing and using the time to creatively work out my feelings on Milgram as a series. Admittedly writing that oc milgram with Star has actually been really helpful with doing that. It made me really think about what it would be like for people to be in this sort of situation and had me looking at the characters and the audiences behavior in brand new ways.

Given the theme of what we're writing heavily being rooted in self-forgiveness I've been thinking of the many ways people forgive and I've come to some interesting conclusion.

Firstly to the surprise of no one I still don't like the way the fandom uses forgiveness when it comes to the series. I never really did. People highlighting that this isn't about Guilt or Innocence it's about forgiving or not forgiving is really fucking dumb.

Like not to be blunt as hell but anyone really viewing this solely from a point of forgiving or not forgiving others is missing a lot of the point. Viewing Milgram through that lense alone or even just through the framing of guilt or innocence is only really touching the surface.

Milgram showcases the issue with only viewing things through these framings alone over the course of trial one.

Mainly through the lyrics sprinkled throughout the first trial songs that call to attention these ways of looking at the situations presented to us.

The songs actually hit on judging someone as being guilty or justified first,

"Am I a bad girl? Please don’t answer."

This line later serves to contrast both Haruka and Mu's trial two lyrics,

"I just want to be your good boy. I will keep on killing to be a good boy."

Haruka's line can be used to highlight the juxtaposition of his mindset and Yuno's. Both characters continuing to contrast and highlight each others strengths and flaws through how close in proximity their songs are.

So when Yuno gets upset over being caressed with the words good girl it actively highlights a titular part of Milgram,

What will work with one person won't always work with another. This is what Haruka wants and the type of dotting attention he enjoys but Yuno is not the same way.

Meanwhile Mu's line in It's not my fault is more of a direct parallel to what Yuno said,

"Hey, what if- If I am a bad girl? Don’t hate me."

This line servers to show the difference in Yuno and Mu's mentalities. Yuno doesn't want an answer. She doesn't want the label of good or bad. Continuing to state as much in her second trial song.

In contrast Mu despite singing about how it's not her fault recognizes that she is in fact the bad.

She's not asking am I a bad girl. No she's going,

"So, hey what if i am this thing? What if I presented myself as not being x but I really am? Will you still like me?"

Which makes perfect sense for her narrative because she just spent her entire first two voice dramas framing herself as a victim of bullying and someone who'd never bully others. Despite knowing full and well what she's done.

Mu like Kazui, Mahiru, Amane, and Kotoko all want their wrongs to be recognized and forgiven. They know what they did was wrong and have made it apparent that they do. Yet they still want to be forgiven all the same.

This is something Amane and Kotoko do blatantly. Displaying very little shame or hesitance around discussing their wrong doings over the course of the trials.

Kazui and Mu on the other hand are more ashamed of what they did. Along with being terrified by the idea of possibly getting hurt again if they open up. So they try to present themselves in more human and palatable ways.

They both do this by selfishly highlighting their own feelings and using the other parties around them as nothing more than props-

Yuno and Mikoto are very much mind your business or believe what I'm saying. If you can't do that then shut up and go away-

Mikoto

"All I did was dream, so you find me INNOCENT, it’s that simple right? Come to know me as an honest man, eat your words, gulp them down." "Please tell me it’s a mistake, that’s it’s a lie. That I’m right, I’ll forgive you if you tell me now."

Yuno

"Just shut it, will you? You know it all. Caressing me with your “Good girl” Who needs your self-righteous pardon?" "Please don’t answer."

Yuno goes to great lengths to explain how people treating her certain ways has never done anything for her. In both her first and second voice dramas.

Yuno First Voice Drama 5:29,

"That's right. You know those people who just want to convince themselves. So, they intrude on other people's affairs even though it's not their place? I despise them. That's what I was saying."

"So, nauseating...so, creepy...will you please disappear." - "Please don't answer." - "Just shut it, will you? You know it all."

"I don’t need to be lectured to like that. Do you just want to make yourself feel even better?" - "Who needs your self-righteous pardon?"

Yuno's songs highlight how being judged by another persons standards ultimately does nothing to change how someone feels internally. Not only that but it can actual cause more damage even if the person only has positives or sympathetic things to say to the other party. So, it's best to just do what the audience showed Futa to do through the first trial verdict-

Mind your own business. Instead of intruding on other people's affairs when it's not one's place to. Yuno even states in the same voice drama that there's no limit to how others will judge the people around them outside of the law.

Futa follows after her introducing the sort of tactics the first trial will end on. Highlighting that there are people who do wrong that go unchecked and at times socially rewarded for the things they've done. Just getting a slap on the wrist and spoken poorly about as a result. At times never even apologizing for the way their selfish actions have inconvenienced the rest of society.

Very similar to the mindset Kotoko showcases at the end of Milgram except she highlights the most extreme example of wrongdoing. Yet she also highlights a bunch of petty crimes just like Futa one literally being bike theft.

Both songs show that Futa and Kotoko both believe strongly in the guilty or innocent framework. That if someone does something wrong they should pay for it. Especially if it's a repeated pattern of behavior.

Yet with Mu and Shidou is where things get interesting. Mu's story highlights the seemingly never ending grief that comes from not being able to apologize to a person you've wronged. Because they're not their to apologize to anymore.

Orihime's first arc in Bleach highlights this feeling well so I'll just link the scene

Look I'm gonna need to to follow like these instructions exactly because there is no clip of this scene go here and then skip to 18:30 you can do dub or sub just watch the scene in it's entirety to 19:33 to get my point. Then come back here so this hurts more.

Hey, did you see the closure Mu will never have? Let's continue now under that emotional understanding for context. Experiencing Bleach when I was like fucking ten really did some shit.

Because when I saw After Pain and saw these lyrics,

"“I’m sorry” won’t reach anyone."

Coupled with this imagery-

I was like damn whatever we do this person is fucked. Because you can apologize to corpses all day but they're not going to get back up and start walking.

"Oh, shit you're sorry for stabbing me that changes everything!" Mu's victim's heart restarts, and they hug it out.

Sorry Mu even though you talk like a Pokémon doesn't mean your tears have the same effect. I was watching another video recently that discussed an episode of Buffy The Vampire Slayer called the body and like you just gotta see the discussion.

Spider-Man Lotus - A Film Born From Spite The Cosmonaut Variety hour 28:12 to 34:24.

Then when you have even more emotional information follow me on this. Really think about this with me-

Does being forgiven by strangers who have nothing to do with the situation really give someone in Mu's position closure? No, and that's why even though she was forgiven, her second song is her very rapidly spiraling into self-doubt and hate.

Because no amount of outward validation will be enough for Mu. She'll only need more because the one person whose words would matter in this situation isn't alive to speak anymore. No amount of apologizing or people going I understand what you're going through will help.

Because no, they don't. No one really understands what it's like for someone to die when you are not on speaking terms with them or you feel you've done them wrong other than people who have lived through that. Which is already traumatic enough without adding into the mix, "Oh wait, you're the reason they're dead too."

Which is the point of her and Futa being paired together.

Because there two people who took very mundane situations way too far.

"It’s going great, we’re gonna punish you until you cry. If you get off now, you're a traitor."/"Don’t you think it’s wonderful to control them with my gentle sting? If you want to betray from jealousy- You know what’s gonna happen ON YOU!"

After Mu, Shidou comes in to basically say the quiet part aloud when it comes to viewing this under a forgive or not forgive framework,

“Throw down” ethics is a delusion I’m still guilty even if the morning comes. - "Please, don’t forgive me. That’s why I want this to end."

Regardless of if Shidou is forgiven by the audience or anyone else around him. Even if the sun comes up again that guilt doesn't just disappear. He can't stay away- He'll always be stuck trying to atone for his past mistakes trying to do it again this time but better.

Because all of that couldn't have been for nothing. He's indispensable even if it's unpleasant it's up to him you know- There are lives that need saving. So, he'll do the same thing again and again because there will always be lives that need safeguarding.

Gif provided and made by @apatchworkstar

How far can forgiveness or pursuing another persons innocence go- If those people aren't willing to forgive or view themselves as innocent? If they can't move passed it. If they've made their permanent home address turmoil.

Whose opinion of ourselves really matters more than our own?

Just like Mu second voice drama said to Es,

"Guard-san, we call you "Guard" because that's what you are, right?

I was assigned to be a prisoner, but that doesn't mean my heart will become just that of a "prisoner" too. After all, I'm still me."

even though she's here she's still Mu.

[strawberrisncreme]

A Good Day

(Read on Ao3 HERE)

Pairing: Young!Clive x Reader (iirc I made it p much gender neutral save for one tiny part)

Summary: As Rosalith's (admittedly young) chocobo caretaker, it is your duty to ensure the well-being of the birds. What starts as another average day ends up being more eventful as you bump into the young lord Clive Rosfield.

AN: I really tried writing fics again just for this game, emphasis on the word TRIED. I haven't written shit in 10 years

Year of the Realm 860 Rosalith - The Grand Duchy of Rosaria

The streets of Rosalith slowly come alive as the first hints of sunrise casts a warm glow across the cobblestone paths. The insistent “kweh’s” of hungry chocobos fill the air as you make your way towards the wooden stables, grimacing as you feel your boots sink into the muddy ground. Your sleep-addled brain can barely keep up as you carry out your duties of replenishing each chocobo’s greens and setting out fresh straw. While it’s admittedly not the most engaging task, you find comfort in the routine and can think of far worse company than the gentle birds that you care for. Wiping the sweat from your brow, you can’t keep the smile of excitement off your face as you walk up to the next bird, her sharp blue eyes snapping to you as you carefully extend your arm to her, waiting to see if she’d accept your offer of pats.

“Hello Ambrosia, I apologize for being a bit behind schedule…some of the others were being difficult today, but I trust you won’t hold it against me?”

You beam as she nudges her head into your outstretched hand, permitting you to give her snowy white feathers a quick ruffle before you turn, tending to her empty food trough. 

“You know girl, I have a feeling that today will be a good day.” You mumble as you fish out her quality greens, “I heard that Clive was planning on going for a ride today, wouldn’t that be nice? Take you out for some fresh air, maybe even get in a few kills…mind you, that would mean more work for me. It’s a right pain in the arse trying to get blood out of your feathers.”

So caught up in your tasks, you were painfully unaware of the new presence of a certain young lord Rosfield who was casually leaning against the wooden post at the entrance of Ambrosia’s stable, quietly listening to your musings. 

“But you ought to be careful out there, I know you wouldn’t let it happen but with the Blight and all who knows what you and Clive see out there mm? Can’t let the young lord get hurt… or you for that matter.” You laugh, standing up, “Well, not like he’d listen to me- OH!” You jump as you finally take notice of your silent companion. Well, aside from Ambrosia of course. “Lord Rosfield!” You exclaim, hastily bending at the waist into a rather ungraceful bow. “Forgive me, I was not aware that you would be at the stables this early in the morning!” 

You can hear him stifle a laugh as he walks closer, his boots coming into your field of vision from where you remain bowed over.  “Please, rise. And you need not show such stiff formalities, after all, did I not just hear you refer to me by name instead of title?”  You quickly snap out of your bow, inwardly cringing at your appearance (a messy and sweaty mess) an embarrassingly stark contrast to his well put-together attire, the morning sun glinting off the sword he keeps hung on his back. Silently, you pray furiously for him to mistake the flush on your cheeks as a result of your physical labor, and not as an effect of you being in his presence alone.

So what if you held a tiny flame for the young lord? It’s not your fault he was blessed with a pretty face...and a likable personality… and- Great Greagor. What wasn’t there to like about him??

“-ou feeling well? Shall I call for a healer?” You quickly shook away your thoughts as you refocused your eyes (and thoughts) on Clive, resisting the urge to physically slap some sense into yourself.

“Apologies, my lord, how may I serve you?” You hurriedly lowered yourself into another bow, nervously fiddling with the front of your skirt. 

“Please, Clive is perfectly suitable. He stepped closer, arms outstretched as he motioned for you to stand. “There is no one here save for the chocobos, and I doubt they have much regard for titles.” 

You straighten out once more, awkwardly nodding in agreement. “Well, right then…how can I be of service to you…Clive?” The name felt wrong coming out of your mouth now, while it wasn’t the first time you used it, you could never get used to referring to any of the Rosfield’s as anything less than their rank…to their faces at least. Clive on the other hand grinned at your compliance, turning to smooth out some of Ambrosia’s feathers.

“It seems I rose earlier than usual today, it’s a while yet before my presence is needed elsewhere so I thought to pay a visit to the stables.” 

Ambrosia happily soaked up the attention from her favorite human, letting out a soft kweh as he rhythmically stroked along her beak. Anyone would agree that it was a damned adorable sight.

“She is a fine bird” you say, affection evident in your voice, “it would be rude of me to have a favorite out of all the steeds, but I won’t tell if you don’t.” You grinned at him, carefully grabbing your broom to sweep away bits of dust and straw that littered the floor. 

You failed to notice the light flush that colored his face as he cleared his throat, “That she is, you have my gratitude for taking such good care of her. It’s clear that she’s taken a liking to you.” 

You shook your head, “She’s just a naturally sweet girl, I’m sure she’d behave the same with any other chocobo handler.” 

He scoffs, running his hand through her plumage “You’d be surprised, consider it a compliment… by the Mother, ” He sighed, his face twitched slightly in embarrassment, “how embarrassing…I never asked for your name.” You stood there, dumbfounded for a moment. “Please, my lord-” “Clive.” “... Clive . That really won't be necessary-”

“Nonsense, I would like to know the name of the individual who takes such good care of our birds.” His smile was almost blinding as you floundered inside your head. Embarrassingly, your name seemed to slip from your mind for a moment. “It’s ___!  But please my lord, you need not feel pressured to use it-” “ ___? ___… ” He tested, unaware of your rapidly increasing heartbeat. This is it. You were going to die in a chocobo stable. “I like it.” He says, the smile evident in his voice, “It suits you.” “You have my thanks my lor- I mean, thank you, Clive.” You stuttered out, gripping the handle of your broom tightly.  He smiled brightly at you, seemingly wanting to say more but was quickly interrupted at the sudden sharp shout of “LORD ROSFIELD!” that pierced the calm morning air. “It seems that I let time slip away from me,” he said sheepishly, “my apologies, but I should make haste before Commander Murdoch wakes the entirety of Rosaria…thank you for taking the time to speak with me ___ . I shall leave Ambrosia in your more than capable hands.” You quickly bow your head to him, still unused to hearing your name coming from his lips. Giving you one last smile of gratitude, he pats Ambrosia on the neck affectionately before slipping out of the stables. Turning to the snowy chocobo, you watch in a daze as she happily wolfs down her breakfast. “A very good day indeed…” 

[maximotts]

*breaks down the door* MILF MOMMY WANDA WHO LOVES TO SHOW YOU OFF TO HER FRIENDS

she definitely has you wear cute little outfits around them and when you interrupt her she gets a little upset at you and always points out “they are just a little dumb doll who doesn’t think before they do anything, they always need mommy’s help”

Only Luna or Aries could make me do Doll House revival and that’s a rock fact

cw: no smut, just regular doll house!au warnings

“Come on out, sweetheart! No one will bite.”

Wanda beckoned you over from her spot on the plush living room sofa, arm stretched out to entice you from where you peeked out from around the corner. Her smile was gentle, kind, the type of smile you’d sprint towards if it'd been just the two of you.

Three unfamiliar faces looked your way as well, patiently waiting to get a better look at the girl Wanda always spoke so highly of, but anxiety kept you clung tight to the wall. Not only was it a rarity you saw anyone other than Wanda, but try as you might, you couldn't remember a time where they'd been so close. Certainly not in your home, your safe haven; the house Wanda insisted was the safest place for you at all times.

The strangeness of it all overwhelmed you terribly.

Wanda saw the shake of your head, barely caught the quiet noise of disagreement as you shuffled further away and sympathetic as she was to your hesitancy, she couldn't allow defiance of any kind. Especially in front of her friends.

"Don't take another step unless it's into this room, little one. Come to mommy... now," Back turned to the new women, Wanda's mouth fell into a hard line, one quirked brow creating that look you knew meant you were walking a fine line to being disciplined. Her finger curled, dragging you forwards before adding on a sickeningly fake sweet, "please."

Your cotton socked feet were silent on the carpeted floor, slow and careful steps taking you around the couch to stand right in front of the older woman, fidgeting nervously as you tried to stay in her good graces. "'m sorry, mommy...I'm just scared."

Hard as you tried to keep your voice low enough for only Wanda could hear, her friends' amused laughter told you they understood perfectly. "There's no reason to be scared, silly girl. Everyone came here to meet you and I dressed you up so prettily today just for the occasion!"

"And you did a wonderful job, Wands. She really is the sweetest little thing!" As you turned around, the woman with long curly hair admired you with a wide grin. The comment alone was more than enough to fluster you, but then she reached out, fingers batting at the hem of your floral dress and you squeaked in distress.

It was a rule you had yet to face until now: being mommy's perfect doll meant you were hers only, no one else was allowed to touch. Having never seen or thought about other people's existence, you rarely paid it any mind, but today, even though you backed away instantly, you feared you'd inadvertently landed yourself in hot water.

But Wanda only pulled you down to sit in her lap, letting you scramble into the safety of her arms, soothing your frantic, rambling apologies with a single finger placed upon your lips. "You're okay, I know it wasn't your fault, I'm not mad."

With as much gentleness she dealt you, Wanda gave annoyance in kind to her bold friend and you didn't miss the possessive hold she kept you in as she spoke. "Agatha, I thought I made it very clear not to touch."

"Well sorry! It's a slip of habit; I should bring my toy over one day; they'd get along well."

Admittedly, you didn't pay much attention to the conversation past that, your thoughts settling into near nothingness as you cuddled up against your mommy. The four of them spoke about people and places you'd never heard of; it was too easy to tune them out in favor of resting your head on Wanda's chest and listening to the rumbling vibrations whenever she chimed in.

You lost track of time, hadn't realized you'd closed your eyes until the words 'nap time' fell upon your ears. "Noo mama... Let me stay with you!" Your voice was weak from sleep, but insistent, unwilling to part from Wanda and the comfortable position you'd carefully nestled yourself into.

Tired as you were, you'd interrupted her mid-sentence— a rule you knew well enough not to break. But opening your mouth for apology wasn't.. working; your lips wouldn't part no matter how hard you tried. "I know I didn't hear you talking back, did I, dolly? And certainly not interrupting me?"

A few more fruitless tries of opening your jaw and you settled for a remorseful head shake, stretching up to nuzzle against her cheek and wrap your arms around her to convey how sorry you were. Humiliation poked in the back of your brain as the ladies 'aww'ed and fawned over you with pity, playfully urging Wanda to go easy on such a helpless little toy, but your mommy's forgiveness was much more important.

When you pulled away it was with pleading eyes, begging her to allow you to stay in her lap. Wanda chuckled and pinched your nose, even granting you a kiss on your warm cheek— you still couldn't speak when she muttered her firm 'no.' "She's such a dumb little doll, forgetting to think before speaking. This one always needs mommy's help, isn't that right, sweet girl?"

Your nod was a reflex, forever willing to let Wanda help you with anything from the biggest task to something as simple as tying your shoes. "And Mommy always knows best which, right now, is nap time. Please excuse me, ladies, while I put her to bed. When I come back, I'll bring the tea tray!"

[alexandersmistake]

My own chastity sentence ended two days ago so of course you know what that means.

Cruel and disrespectful thoughts of my lover have flooded my brain every hour of every day!

The cage was the only thing keeping me in line, and now I have nothing to prevent me dedicating every second of my days counting down to our marriage. Dreaming of ways that I will manipulate and break down C every day till then. All the different methods of physical isolation and sexual addiction I'll impose on her just to strip her of any kind of identity. It'll be a part of our vows. That conversion from woman to slave. Officially.

The main thing that is currently wrapping my brain, admittedly because of my most recent play time, is forcing C in a chastity belt. I'm vindictive and cruel. For every hour I was straining in my cage I want a week of her cunt denied feeling anything all together. It's only fair. I'm a god that was trapped in a cage. And she is a doll who watched me do that without begging for my cock to be free. It was my choice to lock myself but it should have been her obsession to try and fight my decision. Toys beg to be used. I don't have time or patience for useless toys. If my toy doesn't have tears in her eyes at the mere idea that my cock is locked up- she's useless to me. At least her mind is. I can still make use of her cunt. But that mind of hers needs to be fixed. I blame her "hobbies" for her falling behind in training.

To break the rest of her I need to deny her. So the chastity belt is necessary. Weeks of denial and torture. Months of training her tits to be able to take more and more pain. And half a year anal and throat training. That should be enough to fix the problem for now. At least till we are married and have a house. By then none of the training she suffers now will be even a fraction of what she needs to be perfect in my eyes. A broken slave is still a person. Eventually I'll have a pretty dolly to play with. To do this I need her complete focus on suffering for me. I don't have her complete focus though.

It physically gets me hard, mean, and angry to know C's choice of hobby is walking around every day at her college "learning". It's a distraction and keeps her from actually learning. At least learning the lessons that are important to a mutt. Without a physical reminder to keep her docile at college; it's only a matter of time that I'll have to hurt her to keep her in line. I mean she will always stay obedient. Im not worried about that. But getting to walk freely amongst educated people daily will make it hard for her poor little subby brain to accept the truth without question. If she can walk freely on campus without a reminder that she lives for me, her poor little girly mind will drift. She will take twice as long to turn into a mind numbed slave. She would take orders just a microsecond too slow. She would beg just a decibel too quiet. She would cum (when I torture it out of her) with just a little too much joy. She would be just the slightest bit off from the perfection that I, her god and master, decided is right for her. And the only way to fix that over time would be more raping, more threatening, more beatings, and more humiliation.

So realistically If I just put her in a belt now, she can't go to that pesky school without being reminded of her place as the bottom of our entire fucking society. It's a mercy. It'll make life easier for her later. It will make her understand faster with less correction. Doesn't that sound so sweet C? Don't you want to be made better for me without having to make your master suffer through the effort of striking you? I know you do. It's okay. You are a good slave C. You obey nice and pretty. I'm not mad at you in the slightest for going this "college" hobby and pretending to be a real woman. You know you are beneath every girl you see around you. You know that you are some dumbed down beta with a brain between her legs. It's not your fault. It's not your fault you were born broken. You just need the training aid. And if how I force you into it is cruel or mean just remember it's for your own good. Just because you want to have this dumb little hobby of going to school and pretending to be normal doesn't mean you can fall behind on getting ready for the real world. Your world. Your life. Your purpose. Your dream job.

My devoted wife.

I wasn't going to post anything horny today but a mutual and misogynist followed me back today! Which means a little public exposure for you (C) is necessary. I hope you are happy my love. I pay close attention to this account. And the more eyes i see on it, the more ill show off to everyone just how much you have or will let me get away with. The more they will know the fucked up little fantasies you have. The more they will understand you will let your man do anything he wants to you because you are addicted to humiliation and pain. I will never waste an opportunity to expose you or publicly degrade you. Good luck spending the rest of your life with me C. It'll be at my discretion

[kindheart525]

This post inspired me to do a little exploration of Gola’s teenage years! She’s not very kind to others as an adult, making a hobby out of rage-baiting strangers on the internet, but one thing she does have going for her is that she’s very confident in herself and her looks. Believe it or not, she was once very insecure.

Her whole thing is that she has a gorgeous supermodel body topped off with a goofy, cartoonish, bug-eyed critter head, and this was not something she was proud of. Especially since she had no hair which really accentuated the oddly-shaped nub atop her shoulders. For a time she wore a wig to cover this up, even though the vibrant blue waves and modest (by her standards lol) clothing only concealed self-loathing.

You might expect a sad girl who clings to her pillow at night and hopes for friendship and joy in her life, but that was not Gola at all. As much as she hated her own looks, she made a conscious effort to ensure that everyone else felt a thousand times worse. To one-up her own bullies and be even meaner than them.

Kip felt bad for Gola. Just a few years ago she was in the same position, feeling so insecure in her own self-image that she made it everyone else’s problem. Even to the point of hurting her best friend. She didn’t exactly try to fix Gola or anything, but she did reach out and try to be a smiling face who she could take comfort in. A glimmer of kindness in what she knows feels like a cruel world when you’re a growing girl. Maybe it would mean something to Gola.

But as you can see here, Kip quickly realized that Gola didn’t want kindness. She might have struggled with her self-esteem but she took joy in being a bully, in stirring shit just for the hell of it. Kip’s kindness didn’t quell that flame, but rather stoked it, reigniting her own insecurities in the process.

But Gola wasn’t free from consequences.

Ell quickly heard about what Gola did and jumped to Kip’s defense, as any good sister would. Gola would usually taunt such vigilantes, but Ell is like a sister to her and it admittedly did feel pretty shitty to get on her bad side like this. The girls who usually conspired with each other got pitted against each other by her actions. This didn’t lead to any sort of epiphany where Gola changed her ways or anything, but it did force her to deliver an awkward apology to Kip and recognize her as off-limits to her vitriol.

Eventually Gola experienced a shift in mindset, a recognition that by covering herself up, she was just letting those assholes win. Becoming a bully wasn’t enough when she was still letting her own bullies control her actions and her opinion of herself. So she ditched the wig and is now showing the world that she doesn’t give a fuck what they think.

She also calmed down a bit with the deeply personal attacks, now only delivering insults to those she feels have explicitly wronged her rather than to every passerby who acknowledges her existence. A girl like Kip might grow from her insecurities as someone who spreads kindness, who does her best to make sure nobody else feels like her, but Gola learned how to fight back. Someone makes fun of her bald head? She fires back with, “I hope you get cancer.”

Besides the fighting back against bullies, Gola does still enjoy the art of taunting strangers through internet trolling. Except instead of having a vendetta against everyone who’s more confident than her, instead of having any ulterior and deeply personal motives, she just thinks it’s funny to watch people work themselves into a tizzy over some comment she made to bait them. It’s not her fault they fell for it and provided her free entertainment.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for potentially having been the reason why the relationship of two of my friends ended?

okay so i know this sounds bad, but i don’t think it’s my fault (at least not entirely).

so this happened 3 years ago almost. at the time, two of my best friends were dating each other. we were all part of a bigger friend group of like 6 people.

I’ll call those two friends who dated sam and jane. (fake names obviously)

The whole friend group was relatively new and only like half a year old when they started dating. i had only known sam for the time that friend group existed, so not very long by then. jane on the other hand, had been one of my best friends since we were both in kindergarten.

jane and i were around 16 then and sam was 15.

i had had a crush on jane for years at this point, but never told her because i always either thought she was straight (so she wouldn’t be into another girl aka she would never be into me) or because she was taken or because i just didn’t want to risk this long friendship ending.

but of info:

sam was (at the time) a cis guy. (sam is now questioning their gender but is leaning towards nonbinary transfem, but that was not yet the case during the time this story happened. so i will be using they/them pronouns for same obviously, but keep in mind that at the time, sam was a cis guy). before sam and jane got together, sam told me they had a crush on me but i rejected them.

jane (at the time) identified as bisexual.

the thing is, all of this happened during covid so sam and jane couldn’t see each other very often, but sometimes when the number of cases in our town went down, the restrictions were lifted. so one day, it was allowed to meet up in smaller groups again. so sam, jane, another friend and i spent the day together in town.

eventually that other friend had to leave because of something unrelated, so i was alone with the other two. sam and jane were in that stage of the relationship were they were very comfortable with each other and kinda already out of the “honeymoon” stage yk?

since i was very close to both of them separately, i didn’t feel like a third wheel there. it was a tiny bit awkward for me, because i did still have that crush on jane, but neither of them knew that.

we were all just kinda talking until the convo turned to like reminiscing about jane and my past since we’ve been friends very long and have been through a lot together. at some point, jane said that she has something to say that i might find weird.

obviously, this made me (and sam) very curious. jane laughed and then said that she used to have a huge crush on me, but was too shy to say that. i was admittedly not unhappy about that, so i told her that i too “used to” have a crush on her. (i lied a bit in the way that i said that was in the past when that crush very much was still there).

then i felt kinda bad, but before i could like backtrack (bc obviously i wasn’t trying to mess with their relationship), sam laughed and said that they wouldn’t mind if i joined their relationship. jane agreed and like kinda officially “invited me in.” (they were not in an open relationship, but apparently both their crushes on me were not so much in the past as i thought lol).

at first i thought that was a joke, but apparently they had kinda talked about that before and while it was spontaneous, it was definitely also a serious offer.

i was however still not into sam, and i didn’t think it was fair if i said yes without actually liking both of them back, so i rejected them awkwardly and went home not long after because i was totally not expecting that and just like totally startled me yk?

shortly after, like a few weeks, jane broke up with sam and said that she realized that she’s a lesbian because of “something that happened recently” and like. she never did say what it was, but one of our mutual friends who i had told about that situation from before, kept insinuating that i was involved in whatever situation jane meant. jane and sam themselves have never said anything like that to me and they are both still friends with each other (and with me, even if jane and i are more distant now).

so it’s very ambiguous if i really had anything to do with the end of their relationship, but that one mutual friend fully thinks that it was at least in part because of me. but like idk. so AITA?

What are these acronyms?

[docholligay]

I do think there are a handful of missteps in the show, admittedly, and one of them is that Claudia loses a lot of her resonance. I know, if I get murdered by the fandom over one thing, it will be this. I know she's a huge fan favorite. I don't even dislike her!

But aging her up compromised the tragedy of her situation, and honestly, made it a bit ridiculous. I know all of the extra-universe reasons she had to be aged up, but that doesn't change the question of what Claudia is doing in the story as she is presented.

We're asked to swallow this idea of being their daughter, of them using her to repair a marriage. The story of Interview With the Vampire is, in many ways, the story of both losing a child, and the tragedy of hanging onto a child. Claudia's tragedy is that she is frozen in amber. She can never grow up. She can never change. She is locked in that childish moment, seen as a child by her parents forever, and this is her great tragedy.

All of this becomes much harder to swallow about a fourteen year old, specifically given the time period in which she's turned. It's not that fourteen year olds were regularly running around by themselves, but in an edge neighborhood, in New Orleans, in the early 1900s, it's hardly out of the question. People would not have thought of her as a 'little girl'. So as soon as we enter into this, it's already become unserious. Her ruthless killing is not belied by a cupid-like look, because she is too old to look cupid-like. The way Louis and Lestat think of her is entirely out of their position and time.

I will admit to a piece of bias: I think Claudia is as close as Anne Rice ever comes to actually doing something really compelling with the narrative. In any of the Vampire Chronicles books. I think this tragedy of a child who did survive, a child who, unlike her own, will live forever, and the way she works through that as its own tragedy worse than death, and how CLAUDIA. HAS. TO DIE. Because that's what happened, and that's how it must happen, is probably the greatest literary stroke in any of the novels. So it pains me to see it essentially wiped away by child labor laws (The children yearn for the mines).

We have to deal with it, then, in these half measures. She's a child who can do nothing, she runs around on college campuses by herself, she will never be taken seriously and everyone sees her as a child, Madeline being attracted to her is no way unsettling or odd, etc. They try to make a big deal of her being a teenager forever, and always prone to irrational emotions, but she's written as one of the most reasonable people of season two. We are shackled to the Claudia of the books who cannot live with the Claudia of the show. Her character doesn't stand up to much scrutiny, we lose both its tragedy and its monstrousness and we are left with a pretty cool lady vampire in her own right, but someone who fails to deliver on the promise of Claudia's tragedy.

This isn't really her fault, but it becomes even more ridiculous with the actress switch in season two, who looks even OLDER than the original actress. I know that even Kirsten Dunst was too old, and where the fuck are you going to find a twelve year old like Kirsten Dunst again, who looked younger than she was and could act like a forty year old woman? But I do mourn the loss of a Claudia who was a tragic child, for a Claudia who is...inconvenienced. I would have preferred the ol Olsen Twins trick, having twins play a singular role so she could be actually a child, but we can't have everything.

(I will say a change with Claudia I HATED initially, that I came around to really liking, was having Lestat turn her after Louis' begging, and not having had Louis drain her in a moment of weakness. I love that moment in the books, and was SO disappointed that he just...saved her. Saint fucking Louis. But I came around to it, and I am so glad I waited for season two. I think they did a great job in the sketching of it.)

THIS IS THE ONE I'LL GET HATEMAIL ABOUT

[livvyofthelake]

new lost ranking post the hurley episode i watched last night. episode 18? maybe. whatever

1. jack obviously. he’s never getting knocked off the top of the pyramid there’s literally nothing anyone else could do to make me like them more than jack…. nothing this show ever does will ever beat do no harm

2. sayid!!! his swag is like. so unbeatable… he just hits different AND he’s a total hottie too woah… loving his paranoid insane freak arc this season. the writers were like what if we killed his girlfriend and made him act insane. and i’m eating it up actually i mean i wish they hadn’t killed his girlfriend considering that was literally my good friend shannon who i miss deeply. but sayid is NOT moving on and i love it… need me a freak like that sorry

3. claire… maternity leave was HUGE… and that’s my friend belle she always ranks higher than she probably should because she’s my friend belle <3

4. hurleyyyyy :) my special little prince and i mean this… i’m such a hurley girl and yeah sure you can also chalk that up to the fact that hurley is the pet character of eddie and adam and i would love anything eddie and adam did forever and ever except that tron movie i could never quite get through watching. heart! anyway yeah i love hurley he’s my guy… hurley is so. me age 19 but different but the same. wow. if hurley could read some of my notes app poetry from 2020 he’d feel seen in a way that would motivate him to seek professional help. but let’s not get into that

5. ana lucia SORRY. she kinda sucks so fucking bad and yes she killed my beautiful girl shannon but that was only her fault as much as it’s a gun’s fault when someone uses it to kill someone. so i’ve never blamed her for that it’s just a bad situation which she will notttt be coming out on top of 😐. but i think she’s sooo cool in a woman who sucks way… and her cunty 2000s ass outfit is crazy… the black tank top and low rise bootcut jeans and chunky belt and zip up utility vest…. i’d dress up as her for halloween if i was the kind of person who dressed up for halloween or was willing to buy an ugly belt for a one wear costume. also her plot with sayid rn is soooo good they’re looking at each other just two paranoid FREAKS going. you aren’t crazy. and neither am i. let’s fucking kill these Others. it’s sooooo good… and she never makes the same mistake twice…

6. eko my good friend eko…. he’s so…. he’s just so kind… imagine having the patience and compassion to be nice to charlie right now. woah

7. kate. in her flop era rn and it’s DIRE. but we love her this is the highest i can put her right now i’m sorry girl you just can’t beat out eko and hurley and ana etc when you’re acting like this….

8. rose and bernard <3 soooooo excited for them next episode it’s not even funny… that’s literally rose and bernard….

9. libby. category five obsessed with that freak disease! she took one look at that loser hurley and was like he’s so fucking pathetic and weird. and i want him so bad. and i HAVE to respect her game. she said oh yeah i’m gonna talk him back from suicide and then it’s ON…

10. danielle rousseau… she literally slayed the house down in maternity leave… sorry queen for never including you in these lists before now my bad fr!

11. sun <3 she’s so. your girl friend who deserves way better but she’s so happy with her annoying and unlikeable man you can’t even tell her to dump his ass no matter how bad you want to

12. michael… where tf is michael… i miss him :(

13. new guy. i can’t very well call him henry now can i. wtf is his name… kinda like his pathetic gay swag. but he’s sooo annoying 🙄 and frankly i stand with sayid’s paranoid freak ass… but he’s kinda fun to have around i admit! love how he’s always playing mind games!!

14. locke admittedly has been slaying lately but i still think all his backstory episodes are lame and bad and also. as we say. an enemy of jack’s…

15. jin. he like. swings wildly between me hating him so bad i hope he dies and me thinking he’s soooo interesting and compelling and cool. the whole truth was a crazy episode in this way when it started i was like wow he needs to kill himself. and then by the end i was like woah why is he the most interesting man on lost island…. the way he literally can’t talk to anyone but sun as a physical storytelling metaphor for his closed off nature that prevents him from ever being truly known… wowie!

16. charlie. he’s flopping soooo hard this season. remember when charlie used to be a top five character. that’s crazy

17. sawyer. goes without explanation

[maybeimamuppet]

I LOST THE ASK IM SORRY ANON BUT HERE

REGINA

favorite thing about them

heheeeeeehoooo i’m a lesbian but honestly she has so much like depth to her in a way that’s not immediately obvious and it’s really interesting as a writer getting to explore that beyond canon

least favorite thing about them

i don’t like that i relate to her!!!! i don’t like the idea of being mean and she is and i’m entirely convinced she and i have the same personality disorder and i am terrified that i’m like her. some people have said it and i just hate that it might be true

but like as a character in and of herself it’s how she uses people for her own gain. that’s not cool boo

favorite line

“boo, you whore” from the movie

“that’s what i keep trying to explain to the president on twitter but he blocked me” from the show

i can’t remember enough of what she says in the new movie rn but i’ll find smth later i’m sure lol

brOTP

damian. she and damian both love taylor swift and they listen to every song together and fangirl together and also damian gets her into musicals. regina likes the dark gritty ones with good music like les mis and little shop and damian likes the classics (obvs)

OTP

post redemption arc i ship her with like every woman in this. like any combo of gretchen and karen, i’m an absolute SUCKER for cadina (like i’m literally on my knees begging for cadina fic prompts please), rejanis is. it has potential not my fav but i do partake from time to time.

but like aaron would just turn out bad nobody really likes shane or kevin and damian. is gay. so none of the men lol

nOTP

this woman is GAY so again any of the guys lol. also if it’s done wrong rejanis can be real icky and i don’t like that

random headcanon

she can juggle. cady is the only one who knows and regina will absolutely kill her if she lets it slip

unpopular opinion

she is a victim who made the wrong choices and not the monster a lot of people make her out to be. she is not the villain of the story she is the villain of her own life by fault of her own mind which is the fault of her upbringing and she is making the only choices she knows how which just so happen to hurt a lot of people. she absolutely can be redeemed and she deserves it. which is why the bus doesn’t just straight up kill her.

song i associate with them

i think i said this for janis but monster from frozen has very much internal regina vibes to me that she like is terrified of letting anyone else see. also i know it’s about something VERY DIFFERENT but all grown up from bare seems like it would really speak to her. and also just all of renee’s songs bc duh

favorite picture of them

it’s a gif and this is how i lost the post last time but uh

like. holy shit.

DAMIAN

favorite thing about them

i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again but that boy drinks his loving janis sarkisian juice every morning as part of a balanced breakfast. he knows they’re each others person and i think he navigates their admittedly strange relationship really well. 

and also i love that this ~17 year old fat openly gay kid has SO MUCH confidence in himself. could he be overcompensating and actually have a lot internally that he doesn’t like about himself? yes absolutely . but the way he chooses to handle himself with such grace and confidence as he navigates such a complex web of social issues is really admirable to me and i don’t think he gets enough credit :))

least favorite thing about them

some of the stereotypes aren’t like super cool but like they had to come from somewhere so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

favorite line

damian is what got me into this show tbh i have so many

but i thiiiiiink it’s gotta be either “and they are more addictive than opioids and girl scout thin mints combined” (also hot take but i’ve been a girl scout for 18 years and thin mints SUCK)

OR

“did she just leave while i was actively caring about her? no. / she’s leaving! just like my DAD.”

honestly just like all of stop all of cautionary tale just him i love him yes

brOTP

besides the obvious answer of janis again i would say regina. but also he and gretchen get coffee at least once a week and bond over dances and choreography and whatnot and he and karen are joined at the hip whenever they’re together and you cannot tell me otherwise. and cady is basically his little sister

OTP

THEATRE BOY FROM THE NEW MOVIE OMGGGGG but also like. i don’t really know lol

i usually write him as being with aaron but that’s bc when i was writing like three months in i asked and all my (four) readers at the time said they wanted damiaaron it was not my first pick. but it has grown on me a lot and i think they’re super cute together

nOTP

i am terrified of the amount of romantic fic out there for him and janis?? like y’all ran face first into the point and hit ur heads so hard u still couldn’t see it huh

random headcanon

he kicked janis’ front teeth out in tap class when they were five and janis still has a small scar on her lip

unpopular opinion

i know i write about it a lot and stuff but making him trans feels really reductive of his personality sometimes. we need more trans rep obviously and i love people being able to take characters like him and feel seen but i question it with him in particular a lot. similar vibes to people who make matilda trans i just dk. lots of complicated feelings about it

also that he is the best goddamn character in the whole thing

song i associate with them

uhhhhhh for whatever reason 9 to 5 by dolly parton?? and jolene are the first two to pop into my head lol idk why

oh and also better work bitch by britney spears (i think??)

favorite picture of them

[cxlamarisalxmi]

Rest In Paradise. Rest In Power. ❤️

I’m not part of the COD cosplayer community on TikTok, but I gathered what I could and am going to speak on this because it’s tearing me apart. As a family member of someone who killed themselves this whole thing makes me so fucking angry and upset. And it’s painful to sit here and watch all this happen and see that nobody is being held accountable for it.

This is all the information that I have, there may be some content creators out there that could probably help you understand it better than me but here’s what I know..

Inquisitor was a really genuine guy who had a positive message and told a lot of people that he loved them. Just spreading positivity and good energy through his content and alike. I didn’t follow him and wasn’t part of his fan base but his videos did appear on my FYP consistently. And from what I could tell in his videos that’s not far off, he really did seem like a good guy, really sweet and kind and spreading positivity and love through content he created on his platform.

AJ is a girl who edited videos for him. They had DM’s back and forth on what I believe was Discord, he didn’t realize she was a minor because she had lied to him about being a minor. After he received an edited video from her that he liked he told her; ‘I love you’ and for someone who is just genuinely a positive person that is a normal thing to say to someone who does something nice for you or says something nice to you.

After he got another video from her that he really enjoyed he said ‘Imma marry you’ which admittedly may have not been professional or appropriate but also that is not fucking grooming. Again, he didn’t know that she was underage.

AJ then went to her boyfriend Tito whom encouraged her to keep messaging him under the guise of being an adult. Which she did. Messaged Inquisitor again saying she wanted to talk to him, “be friends”, which he repeatedly denied and shut down. She even lied to him and told him she was not a minor. Something she did because she saw the “MDNI” (minors do not interact) right there in his fucking bio!

She continued to try to bait him into talking to her and he continued to deny her, even going as far as telling her to leave him alone. Of course, this would’ve been incriminating on her as opposed to Inquisitor so she never released any of those screenshots. Only the ones that made it seem like he was grooming her.

As a result, people went after him. Bullying and harassing him on all of his socials, calling him a pedophile and a groomer. She knew that he was not a groomer and she knew that he was not trying to groom her. She was hung up that he didn’t want to do business with her anymore and decided to take a route that would get him canceled. She lied and her and her boyfriend premeditated these allegations to plot against Inquisitor to ruin his reputation, his career and his life.

AJ bullied and harassed him into suicide— which is a crime by the way! And both her and Tito should absolutely be charged for the life they ruined.

They took the bulk of this tragedy but content creator; Keegan’s Mask is at fault too. Not as much as AJ and Tito, she is still at fault for taking AJ’s words as scripture and just running with it. No questions asked, no research of her own, and no follow-up on if what she was saying was true.

Bravo 0-7 was also involved in some way. I’m not sure how or what they did but people know they’re not a good person. Users on TikTok that are or were part of their Discord server have come forward and stated that both Bravo 0-7 and AJ have caused problems before. Bravo 0-7 is apparently known for being rude to strangers or random people in the server. And AJ liked drama, she liked to be part of it and she liked to start it.

They all are responsible, AJ and Tito mostly but Keegan’s Mask has a part on this and I refuse to let that go. What’s more is Tito is refusing to take responsibility for what he has done, saying he had nothing to do with it when he was absolutely the main part of the problem. His behavior is unbelievable and quite frankly— absolutely fucking disgusting and pathetic.

I don’t care what anyone else says, and I especially don’t care what the people defending these two have to say. They absolutely set Inquisitor up, there is no doubt about that. To cancel him. For clout, jealousy or because AJ really wanted to be that petty just because Inquisitor didn’t wish to speak with her I’m unsure, but Tito told AJ to continue messaging him posing as an adult knowing full well she is in fact a minor. “To get more proof to keep my audience entertained.” Is word for word the message that Tito sent during a conversation about the issue.

The “apologies” they issued on their platforms after were pathetic, poorly strung together and if I may be frank— made me fucking livid. I do not wish for their deaths in the slightest as that would not make me any better than them. But I sincerely hope they never find peace over this, they deserve to remember how they drove an innocent man to kill himself, they deserve that constant reminder how their deranged actions had a very real consequence.

We need to do better, not only as a fandom community but as a society as a whole. Dogpiling and witch hunting with no real evidence or proof of allegations has cost a young man his life. He was only 23 years old.

Everything regarding the matter is devastating and everyone involved should 100% be fucking ashamed of themselves.

That being said once again I do not wish to fall to their level and I do not wish that for any of you either. I do not condone sending AJ, Tito, Bravo 0-7 or Keegan’s Mask death threats of any kind, or doxxing them.. if you do that then you are no better than them. Be better than them.

Rest In Paradise. Rest In Power. ❤️

I hope you found the peace you were looking for Vincent.

My condolences and prayers go out to his family and friends that were affected by this tragedy.

You can sign the petition to get him added as a skin in COD here:

[thegeminisage]

IT ISSSS tng update time. sunday we caught "captain's holiday" and "tin man" and last night we did "hollow pursuits" and "the most toys."

captain's holiday: so, i'd heard ahead of time that this was one of the worst star trek episodes Ever, and admittedly it wasn't great, but it wasn't THAT bad. i could name you 10 worse episodes in tng alone and that's without even getting into tos and the other bad episodes that are surely in my future. actually catherine liked it more than i did which is only the second time this has happened in tng

funniest part of this episode to me was riker setting picard up with the little fuck trinket and then picard coming back and giving riker woodshed vibes. don't text. hilarious to send picard to the fuck planet when he wanted to read a book or whatever but at least he got some in the end. i'll never forget patrick stewart telling that one writer that tng's captain didn't do enough shooting or screwing

second funniest part was that the little device they were all fighting over could have saved romulus. "stop the nuclear reaction in a sun" THEY COULD HAVE SAVED ROMULUS AND PICARD DESTROYED IT. THE KELVIN MOVIES ARE ALL HIS FAULT. i guess romulus wouldn't have been that much better off with NO sun but at least its people could have been evacuated. there would have been a little more time.

that said most of this ep was very boring because i'm not actually invested in picard's sex life or his slutty little outfits and definitely not enough to have a whole episode be about him and none of the extended cast

tin man: i liked the concept of this much better than the execution. most of my problems came from the fact that the guest character (hello mister mayor) is annoying. so i was unable to be invested in whatever happened to him

also, i know it;'s her job, but i am soooo tired of deanna getting stuck with all the weird broken men and having to fix them. she's like star trek's manic pixie dream girl sometimes

that said i LOVED their concept of the new biomechanical life because it's JUST like moya from farscape and i like to think the farscape writers were inspired by it <3

also i like data being a boon to overwhelmed telepath because androids dont broadcast thoughts...i like when people are nice to data

i did like riker being kind of righteously mad in this episode too. i was JUST saying we never got to see that from him...it wasn't enough here and it also wasn't Great but i still enjoyed what we got

hollow pursuits: this was the worst episode this entire seaosn easily. i felt like i was watching s1 tng again

IT IS. MASSIVELY UNETHICAL. TO RECREATE REAL PEOPLE IN THE HOLODECK

first of all i hate despise LOATHE any and all holodeck activities. secondly i know they hadn't had to grapple with AI yet in 1990 but surely SOMEONE in that writer's room had to see that it's a huge infringement on deanna's personal rights safety, and dignity to make a fake version of her to fuck in the holodeck

I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS GUY COMES BACK LIKE 4 MORE TIMES.

i feel like what tng was TRYING to do here was "very special episode about anxiety" but what it actually managed to do was make that guy look autistic but like in a bad way. like charlie from tos. and then everyone bullied him and you have to be like. well making and fucking a fake deanna is bad but bullying is also bad

wait actually you know what this is like. this is like that time when i was in public with my family and a man touched me inappropriately. and so after he was gone my mother, jumping to my defense, made some disparaging remarks about this man's race (he was not white). and then i was put in the position of defending this guy who had just been a huge creep to me because you can attack him for being a creep but not because of his race. and my family was baffled that i would defend someone who'd just done that to me. that's what watching this episode felt like.

like, absolutely nobody had a problem with the actual creepy part (holodeck deanna) and everybody had a problem with him stammering in public and being socially awkward. and bullied him accordingly. DOWN TO THE MEAN NICKNAMES.

anyway, 0/10, one of the worst episodes Ever, it literally made me wish i was back in captain's holiday watching picard slut it up. if this episode had been on "am i the asshole" the judgment would have been "everyone sucks here" except deanna, who literally did nothing wrong and suffered the most anyway

hollow pursuit: THIS ONE POPPED THE FUCK OFFFFFFFFFFFFF

10 out of fucking 10. one ZILLION stars. i would have loved it even if i wasn't a data fan but i am a data fan and i had a WONDERFUL time

you spend this whole episode wanting so so so bad for data to kill this guy. data is kidnapped and debased and coerced into playing his captor's games and you want data to kill him SO BAD. and in your mind you're like, yeah but they won't let him KILL the guy kill the guy, it's gonna be like some disney villain stumbling or having an accident and he winds up dead due to Circumstances. there's no way data is gonna fucking kill a guy

and then there's like 30 perfect seconds where you're like: oh fuck. data is GONNA FUCKING KILL A GUY

let me find the exact moment that sent me over the edge. mister captor: "Go ahead. Fire. If only you could feel rage over Varria's death. If only you could feel the need for revenge, then maybe you could fire. But you're just an android. You can't feel anything, can you?"

AND THE ENTIRE TIME. DATA'S FACE IS TWITCHING. AND I SAID ALOUD TRULY GENUINELY BELIEVING HE HAD FINALLY UNLOCKED EMOTIONS I THINK HE CAN FEEL IT ACTUALLY??? LIKE HE LOOKS LIKE HE IS FEELING IT

anyway it counts. data DID fire, and just because they couldnt have him do that on tv and had to transport him away first, he fired (in spite of his program! it was in defense of other life), he meant to kill that man horribly, it counts it counts it COUNTS

furthermore, his mic drop at the end - why would i come see you just to gloat, after all i'm just an android - made me YELL out loud. data is hard as FUCK

i can't take credit to this thought because it was catherine's thought first but it's so fun that both androids we've seen unlock emotion so far - raina unlocked love and lal unlocked fear - were immediately destroyed by it. and what a fun contrast it would be if raina unlocked her emotions with love and data unlocked his with HATE. and i agree because it contrasts so strongly with data's normal loving nature. it's very "anger of a gentle man" of him if that makes any sense. like he is always so unfailingly polite and considerate and forgiving even to people like maddox but enough is Enough.

also, everyone mourning data was really very good. i simply love when people love him...

anyway, that episode fucked. i'm thinking about making it a must see on my spreadsheet <3

TONIGHT, FINALLY: "sarek." i cannot WWWWAIT to see him

[aita-blorbos]

AITA for (unsuccessfully) trying to murder my former fiancee to save her?

cw: cannibalism, kidnapping mention, murder

I (29M when I died, but I'm now undead so technically centuries older than that) used to be the third prince of my country. As a child, I was very sickly and since I was pretty much of no use to my parents, I was neglected emotionally. I had this special medicine, made from dust from a specific key that, if made incorrectly, could be made a poison. This will be important.

Anyways, since my parents wanted some use out of me, when I was 15 they engaged me to this girl, B (15 at the time, 29 when she died, she's immortal now), from a disgraced family of another country. Admittedly I was kinda judgmental about this but turns out her family's disgrace was because of a terrible disease and she grew up all alone because most of her family died, which, growing up alone too, I emphasized with. Over the next few months, we grew close, and when B told me she wanted to travel the world to discover new foods, I thought it would be nice to join her.

Unfortunately, one day, we were having dinner, she started acting strange, and, because of eating trauma from her mom (which no one knew at the time, she told me this when I came back from the dead), she started to violently eat everything in sight in front of my horrified family. Our engagement was broken off, and I didn't see her for years.

One day, I got kidnapped and heard rumors that she went mad. Obviously I was alarmed and concerned for her, and agreed to get a certain magic wine glass for my kidnapper and become a spy to see her again. I disguised myself as a cook for her, cooking up increasingly more and more disgusting foods and banquets for just one person: B. Still loving her, we had sex one time, revealing she knew who I was. Anyways, she then literally made an undead horde kill off a military escort (cause she had kinda neglected her duties because she ate all day and all night) while laughing maniacally about how she planned to eat the whole world, while I watched the screams of the soldiers and the undead in horror.

I was terrified at what she become, so I tried to run away, only to be forced back. Then I decided that we were both too far gone now, so, in a moment where I could be TA, I planned to poison both me and herself with my childhood medicine and soup. Turns out, B had a whole demon in her that took all the damage of the poison for her (and also partially responsible for her descent into her obsession with eating literally everything), leaving her alive and me dead. B then ate me, because yes, she had become a cannibal at this point, and the medicine from my body weakened the demon further. B then died, later, from eating herself.

Anyways, we've reunited centuries later and are pretty much married now despite all that happened, cause we really do love each other, but AITA for this? I felt at fault for her descent, because the stress of getting unengaged AND of most of her family dying must have made her weak enough to get possessed, and I wanted to take responsibility and make sure she couldn't hurt anyone else, but at the same time, she was so upset when I died and I was wondering if there was any way I could have done this differently. Sure B pretty much forgave me for trying to kill her by now but I need to know.