#the funny thing is there's other more important shit going on around them they're just incapable of looking outward

[vykodlak]

Could we maybe hear a bit more about what in the hell is going on between cyprian and his colleague? I'm intrigued and would like to know more if there's anything more to tell that is

Yeas. There's a lot but I'll try to just condense it all to the crux of their relationship.

In short, it all boils down to power, the lack thereof, what they will do to achieve it and how being denied it throughout their lives has shaped their personalities and relationship. And also repression and guilt. They take their complexes out on each other because they believe they’re the only ones who can understand what it’s like being them (well, Nikon takes it out on other people too, but he feels a Connection with Cyprian due to the circumstances of their births).

Both Nikon and Cyprian are considered less than human in their kingdom/region, though there’s little that separates them from humans besides facets of their appearance, their inability to use magic, and who (or what) their parents were. Usually, children of their kind are killed when they are discovered, but sometimes they are taken in by the governing religion to be reformed and used as executors of its laws.

Nikon and Cyprian grew up in the same convent (Cyprian arrived at 8 yrs old while Nikon had already lived and studied there for a couple of years), where it was drilled into their heads that they were wrong, and that this couldn’t be helped but that they could seek to do good in the world to counterbalance the sin that was their existence. Neither of them had much power in their youth, and they felt this lack acutely.

Nikon, stubborn and strong-willed, clawed for scraps of power wherever he could get any, most readily found in tormenting Cyprian. He dealt with his repression by taking his misery out on others. Meanwhile Cyprian, the complete opposite, was meek, pious and obedient to a degree that might be considered self harm - he wouldn’t let himself experience any joy or pleasure in life unless explicitly allowed by his superiors. He felt “powerful” when he was praised and used as a positive example, but punished himself severely for any minor mistake. He was also pretty smug about being 'better' than all the other novices, which made him deeply unpopular and isolated him further. Nikon hated him not just for this behaviour, but because deep down he was also conditioned to seek that praise (which he was usually denied).

As adults, they left the convent to do their duty to the kingdom, but they took their complexes with them. They don’t meet often, but when they do, all of these needs and feelings come back to the forefront. Cyprian has developed a deep need to be treated roughly (it's all he knew, growing up), which troubles him because he realised that he might actually experience pleasure from it (the horror). Nikon sees right through him, and finds it amusing to knock him down from his high and mighty pedestal by exploiting this desire (that he considers to be disgusting and weak, personally). The whole groundhog's day situation goes something like this:

They are both drawn to and repulsed by each other, they can’t keep their hands off each other, and they can’t wait to go their separate ways and then meet again.

tl;dr: the abuses experienced under fantasy catholicism will haunt them forever

[kaijutegu]

Alligator Body Language and You, or: How To Know When An Alligator On Social Media is Being Stressed for Views

Alligators are wild animals. Despite the idiotic claims of animal abusers like Jay Brewer, they cannot be domesticated, which means they are always going to react on the same natural instincts they've had for millions of years. Habituated, yes. Tamed, yes. Trained, definitely. Crocodilians can form bonds with people- they're social and quite intelligent. They can solve problems, use tools, and they're actually quite playful. Alligators are also really good at communicating how they're feeling, but to somebody who doesn't spend much time around them, their body language can be a bit mystifying. And it doesn't help when social media influencers are saying shit like this:

That is not what a happy gator looks like.

That's a terrified, furious gator who isn't attacking because the ogre handling her has her in a chokehold. She's doing everything she can to express her displeasure, and he's lying about it because he knows his audience doesn't even know how to think critically about what he's doing. He knows that because his audience doesn't know anything about these animals, he can get away with it. This I think is why I hate him so much- he deliberately miseducates his audience. He knows what he's doing is factually inaccurate, he just doesn't care because attention means more to him than anything else in the world.

Let's change that! Here are two really important lessons for understanding alligator body language on social media.

Lesson 1: Alligators Don't Smile (in fact, most animals don't)

So what's going on in this video? Jay Brewer is aggressively choking his white alligator Coconut while scrubbing algae off of her with a toothbrush. And make no mistake, he is digging into the creature's throat while she is visibly distressed. He claims she's happy- but she's not. He is willfully misrepresenting what this animal is feeling. That's a problem, because people... well, we actually kind of suck at reading other species' body language. The reason for this is that we tend to overlay our own responses on their physical cues, and that's a problem. For example, let's look at an animal with a really similar face to ours, the chimpanzee. Check out Ama's toothy grin!

Wait, no. That's not a happy smile. That's a threat display. When a chimpanzee "smiles," it's either terrified and doing a fear grimace, or it's showing you its teeth because it intends on using them in your face.

How about a dog? Look at my smiling, happy puppy!

Oh wait no, this is a picture of Ryder when he was super overwhelmed by noise and people during a holiday party. He'd hopped up in my sister's lap to get away from stuff that was happening on the floor and was panting quite heavily. See the tension in the corners of his mouth and his eyes? A lot of the time when a dog "smiles," the smile isn't happy. It's stress! Why Animals Do The Thing has a nice writeup about that, but the point is, our body language is not the same as other species. And for reptiles, body language is wildly different.

For instance, look at these two alligators. Pretty cute, right? Look at 'em, they're posing for a Christmas card or something! How do you think they're feeling?

Well, I'll tell you how the normal one is feeling. He's annoyed! Why is he annoyed? Because the albino just rolled up, pushed another gator off the platform, and is trying to push this guy, too. I know this because I actually saw it happen. It was pretty funny, not gonna lie. He's not gaping all the way, but he was hissing- you can actually see him getting annoyed in the sequence I took right before this shot. Look at him in this first shot here- he's just relaxing, and you can see he isn't gaping even a little bit.

By the end, he's expressing displeasure, but not enough to actually do anything about it. He's annoyed, but he's comfy and that's where one of the best basking areas is, so he'll put up with it.

Reptiles open their mouths wide for a lot of reasons, but never because they are actively enjoying a sensation. Unless they're eating. No reptile smiles- they can't. They don't even have moveable lips. If a reptile is gaping, it's doing so because:

It is doing a threat display.

It is making certain vocalizations, all of which are threats. Alligators are one of the rare reptiles that do regularly vocalize, but most of their calls aren't made with a wide open mouth.

It is about to bite something delicious or somebody stupid. Check out this video- virtually all of the gaping here is anticipatory because these trained gators know darn well that the bowl is full of delicious snacks. (I have some issues with Florida's Wildest, but the man knows how to train a gator AND he is honest about explaining what they're doing and why, and all of his animals are healthy and well-cared for, and he doesn't put the public or his staff at risk- just himself.)

It's too hot and it has opened its mouth to vent some of that heat and thermoregulate. This is the main reason why alligators will often have their mouths part of the way open, but sometimes they'll open all the way for thermoregulation. This is what a thermoregulatory gape looks like- usually it's not all the way open, kinda more like < rather than V, but you can't say that 100% of the time. Additionally, a thermoregulatory gape... typically happens when it's hot out. If they're inside, maybe they've been under their basking light for too long. Heat's the dominant factor, is what I'm getting at.

There is another reason that a captive crocodilian might be gaping, and that's because it's doing so on command. Some places have their gators trained to gape on cue, like St. Augustine Alligator Farm and other good zoos. They have the animals do this in presentations that are genuinely educational. They ask the animals to open their mouths so that they can show off their teeth and demonstrate how their tongues seal off the back of their mouth. They'll also do it as part of routine healthcare, because looking at their teeth is important.

In this case, the animals aren't gaping because they're stressed, they're gaping because they know they're gonna get a piece of chicken or fish if they do it. And what's more, they're doing it on cue. They have a specific command or signal that tells them to open wide. It's not an instinctive response to a situation. It's trained. If the animal provides the behavior after a cue, the situation is much less likely to be negatively impactful.

It's also important to remember that there's a difference between a partially open mouth and a gape! As discussed above, alligators will often have their mouths a little bit open just to maintain temperature homeostasis. It helps them stay comfy, temperature-wise. These guys are all doing thermoregulatory open-mouthed behavior- that slight open and relaxed body posture is a dead giveaway. (That and it's the hottest spot in the enclosure.)

Lesson 2: A Happy Gator Is A Chill Gator

So if alligators don't smile or have facial expressions other than the :V that typically signifies distress, how else can you tell how they're feeling? One way is stillness. See, alligators subscribe to the philosophy of if it sucks... hit da bricks.

Basically, if they hate it, they'll leave. Unless, y'know, somebody has their meaty claws digging into their throat or is otherwise restraining them. (Restraint isn't always bad, btw. Sometimes the animal is going through a medical thing or needs to be restrained for their safety- which a responsible educator will explain.)

Let's look at a very similar scenario, in which a captive alligator is getting his back scrubbed.

As you can see, it's quite different. First, he's not being restrained at all. Second, look at how relaxed he is! He's just chilling there vibing! He could simply get up and leave if he wanted to, because he's not being held. Towards the end of the video, as he lifts his head, you can see that his respiratory rate is very even as his throat flutters a bit. I'm not sure what this facility is, so I can't comment on care/general ethics, but like. In this specific case, this is an alligator enjoying being scrubbed! And you can tell because he's not doing anything. A happy gator is content to be doing what they're doing.

Why Should I Listen To You?

Now, you should ask yourself, why should you listen to me? Why should you trust me, who does not own an alligator, versus Jay Brewer, who owns several?

Well, first off, there's no profit for me in telling you that what you're seeing on social media is in fact not what you're being told you're seeing. I'm not getting paid to do this. That's the thing with people who make social media content. The big names aren't doing it just for fun. They're doing it for money. Whether that's profit through partnerships or sponsorships, or getting more people to visit their facilities, or ad revenue, you can't ignore the factor of money. And this is NOT a bad thing, because it allows educators to do what they're passionate about! People deserve to be paid for the work that they do!

But the problem starts when you chase the algorithm instead of actually educating. A "smiling" alligator gets the views, and if people don't know enough to know better, it keeps getting the views. People love unconventional animal stories and they want those animals to be happy- but the inability to even know where to start with critically evaluating these posts really hinders the ability to spread real information. Like, this post will probably get a couple hundred notes, but that video of Coconut being scrubbed had almost 400,000 likes when I took that screenshot. Think about how many eyeballs that's reached by now. What I'm saying here is that it's just... really important to think critically about who you're getting your information from. What do dissenters say in the comments? What do other professionals say? You won't find a single herpetologist that has anything good to say about Prehistoric Pets, I can tell you that right now.

Another reason you can trust me is that my sources are not "just trust me bro," or "years of experience pretending my pet shop where animals come to die is a real zoo." Instead, here are my primary sources for my information on alligator behavior:

Dragon Songs: Love and Adventure among Crocodiles, Alligators, and Other Dinosaur Relations- Vladimir Dinets

The Secret Social Lives of Reptiles- J. Sean Doody, Vladimir Dinets, Gordon M. Burghardt

Social Behavior Deficiencies in Captive American Alligators (Alligator mississippiensis)- Z Walsh, H Olson, M Clendening, A Rycyk

Social Displays of the American Alligator (Alligator mississippiensis)- Kent Vliet

Social Signals and Behaviors of Adult Alligators and Crocodiles- Leslie Garrick, Jeffery Lang

Never smile at a crocodile: Gaping behaviour in the Nile crocodile at Ndumo Game Reserve, South Africa- Cormac Price, Mohamed Ezat, Céline Hanzen, Colleen Downs (this one's Nile crocs, not American alligators, but it's really useful for modeling an understanding of gape behaviors and proximity)

Thermoregulatory Behavior of Captive American Alligators (Alligator mississippiensis)- Cheryl S. Asa, Gary D. London, Ronald R. Goellner, Norman Haskell, Glenn Roberts, Crispen Wilson

Unprovoked Mouth Gaping Behavior in Extant Crocodylia- Noah J. Carl, Heather A. Stewart, Jenny S. Paul

Thank you for reading! Here's a very happy wild alligator from Sanibel for your trouble.

[sulumuns-dootah]

WHB characters boyfriend HCs

⟡ Masterlist ⟡

A/N: Written mid October as a way to make myself feel better. Might turn this into a series, if anyone is interested ^^

Characters: Satan, Paimon, Beelzebub, Gusion, Michael

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

Bike rides and bar dates - I can just imagine going for a drive through Gehenna's streets, tightly holding onto Satan so you don't fall off a the high speed (Just like Minhyeok when Juno drove him to school in chapter 6)

Okay, on the theme of bars: kinda funny but I imagne him holding his hard liquor much better than something with little-to-none alcohol

Lots of lovebites and hickeys

Despite stuggling to sleep normally, when you're with him, it's the exact opposite and whenever you cuddle, he's out within minutes

His love language is bullying

During his depressive episodes, you're the only one he'll let near him

NSFW HCs

That horn style might as well be called handlebars, bc you sure will be holding onto dear life ( joke stolen from Trixie Mattel)

He has a thing for when someone rides his boots

Kinda obvious one, but a lot of BDSM in the bedroom

If you're a monsterfucker, he wouldn't mind changing into his other form for you

    ༺☆༻

Shopping dates!!

If you wish to, your relationship can be fully off social media despite Pai practically living on them

Matching stuff!

Loves doing your makeup (even if you don't wear any)

Café dates!

Ultimatelly, you're their new photographer for their posts

Overall the vibe of your relationship really gives me the two best friends who also fuck vibes

Every night is a slumber party!

NSFW HCs

If you get periods, they'll make sure you have all the stuff in the world you might need

And if you require some special attention down there, they're more than excited to make you feel good

I can imagine a lot of roleplay with cute outfits for the both of you

    ༺☆༻

Even when you're not with each other, there's at least a fly following you around to make sure you're okay

His clones do prove useful for more than just sex - putting new fitted sheets onto your mattress? done and done!

Every date is in a new location you never even knew about

Despite his memory being shit, he'll remember all the important and small things: your favorite scent? favorite dish? flower? yep, all memorised or turned into a tattoo on his inner wrist!

Oh, speaking of tattoos... You two get a matching one to seal the deal on your relationship

Instead of proposal with a ring, Beel proposes with a piercing needle and giving you the choice of what he'll pierce (you can even pick multiple spots!)

NSFW HCs

Let's get the obvious out of the way: Yes, he loves eating you out so much he'd spend the next century between your legs

And yes, you can say goodbye to deodorants/perfumes

Surprisingly not into food play tho... If you look any more yummy, he might actually eat you :D

    ༺☆༻

Workaholic baby :(

Like seriously, you sometimes have to cleverly lure him away from his math problems

If you're a student, you've won the jackpot! He might not be an expert in your field, but he knows how to help you learn

Gaming nights with some insane hard puzzle games

A cute scenario: Gus taking off his glasses before leaning down to kiss you deeply

I already mentioned this in my post about confessing a crush to him, but he might neglect you a bit from being so into his work so make sure to sound off and let him know

NSFW HCs

Someone gets a bit hot and bothered after your study session together

Ooh! I absolutely can't forget a good ol' teacher/student roleplay

He's most likely originally from Gehenna bc of how horny he got from the thought of having a headache, so I HC that he'll come seek you out after getting one to fuck the life out of you

    ༺☆༻

His hair is 100% pure silk

Your relationship probably started with Mikey first seeing you and not being able to read you, so he decided to keep his remaining eye on you to see what's the story with you

Somehow ended up accidentally(?) falling for you

He's definitelly the most likely demon to get unhealthily obsessed with his s/o

A lot of attachment issues after loosing God and Lucifer

That mom friend for sure (even literally a mom - kinda makes me wonder how he'd react to all the lesser angels he made giving him Mother's day card)

One daydream plot i came up with is that if I were in Hell and Michael showed up, I'd just pretend to be fully delulu that he's into me, but isn't ready to tell me yet The whole "Aw, you came to see me? Does that mean...? that you're ready to confess to me...?" He'd just get disgusted and leave and then everybody claps

NSFW HCs

Kinda obvious, but he's iffy about sexual subjects at first

Still doesn't mean he hasn't thought a few times about breaking out of his chastity cage

Once you break down his restraints, he's maybe even freakier than some demons in Abaddon

Maybe there's a good reason God locked his angels up

Okay, hear me out: Michael x MC x Raphael (yes, death is almost guaranteed, but what a way to go!)

[baby-tini]

Hellloo:33 so i was thinking dazai and chuuya just sharing reader like how would that go?? :3

I'm not doing bsd requests right now but this has been in my inbox for a while, so... also More poly!SKK. TW- very small hint of implied abuse in paragraph two. Dazai and Chuuya sharing someone would be so chaotic, they would have arguments out the ass about who gets too spend time with you and who gets too have you for the day. Because their schedules are so chaotic, you are alone for a bit, but on average you're with Dazai more often then not because his job isn't as demanding as Chuuyas. Being in this.. relationship does have a multitude of factors though, which are as follows. Whether Dazai is still in the port mafia, if the relationship is poly or if it's just sex and how attached they both are to you. If Dazai is still in the port mafia, the relationship between the three of you would be extremely toxic. There would be constant arguments between them about literally everything. Dazai, in the port mafia, is a lot more sadistic and open with his behaviour, whether that be hitting you or saying the meanest shit, he doesn't care. With Chuuya there though, he'd keep Dazai in line and isn't afraid too get physical with Dazai when he needs too, especially if Dazai puts his hands on you. I personally don't see Chuuya ever laying a hand on you, it doesn't matter if he's pissed or not. if Dazai was in the ADA though, it'd be chaotic but not super toxic. Sure, there'd be arguments but it's mostly just funny banter, they also aren't as likely too get into fights together with Dazai being in the ADA, especially if you're there. Dazai in the agency has calmed down quite significantly and isn't as prone to violence, whether that be towards you or people in general, although he does still instigate things, especially with Chuuya, but it's mostly a healthy, fun relationship. If this is a poly relationship, let me just say, you are the safest person in the world and they'd love you deeply, making sure you're safe, because you are the most important person in the world to them and they put you before everything and everyone. I think a poly relationship with them would be so fun and sweet, there's never a dull moment with Dazai and Chuuya is cannonly the best boyfriend in all of BSD, the definition of dream a man. I feel like you'd live with Chuuya and Dazai would also live there or he'd be at Chuuyas house so much that he basically lives there. It would make more sense too live with Chuuya because his house is definitely bigger and more secure. Also the sex with them would be so fucking good with either of them but both at the same time? It's like euphoria. If it's just for sex, Chuuya would still care about you and would most likely develop a deeper connection with you but Dazai wouldn't really care that much for you, also they would be very reluctant too share you with the other, but if you ask nicely, they'd begrudgingly agree. If they are both attached then they're never letting you go, like, ever. They'd want too constantly spend time you, always buying you gifts and taking you out. They would take such good care of you, especially Chuuya, he'd help make dinner, help with the house work and so on. While Dazai would plan spontaneous dates and coddle you constantly, he's also the one you'd spend the most time with because Chuuyas job is very high maintenance. If it's just Dazai that's attached to you, Chuuya would still wanna spend time with you, but he wouldn't be around as often. If Chuuya was the only one attache to you, which is the most likely case, Dazai would wanna be around mostly too spite Chuuya. Overall, a relationship between you and SKK would be a one and only experience. They would both make amazing boyfriends, despite their individual trauma and problems. They care very deeply about you and are willing too kill or die for you, tear the world down with their bare hands for you. They're both very loyal towards you and keep you spoiled and happy.

[bixbythemartian]

walrus vs. fairy

the funny part is that people who answer walrus are mostly like 'I disagree, but I understand why you would answer fairy' and the people who answered fairy are tearing their hair out. some of them are getting mad and/or mean about it, which is kind of upsetting.

so, I will try to help explain.

this will not be about walrus logistics, I promise.

some people believe in fairies. full stop.

fully believe they are real. probably a lot more people than you would be happy about, but you have to allow for this to be true.

even among those who don't wholeheartedly believe in fairies, there's a lot more people who are agnostic about fairies.

people willing to admit that they're not sure if fairies are real, but willing to hedge on the side of maybe the fairies are real.

like, if you rephrased the question 'would you be more surprised to see an angel or a walrus at your door' you would probably be less surprised to see that people would be more shocked at the walrus, because you probably already understand that a lot of people believe in angels and consider them real, whether or not you believe in angels personally

also the SPN fandom would go ham on that, probably. (this is said with deep affection)

there was a fairly famous road built in Ireland that got rerouted because there was a bush that was important to fairies. (source) the fairy tree stalled the plans for the road for a fucking decade. this happened in my lifetime. people talked about it happening on the internet as it was happening, it's not some weird thing that happened in the middle of nowhere in the 1950s or something. they agreed to go around the damned bush in 1999. I know that seems a long time ago to some of y'all, but it really, really isn't.

there are still people who think the cottingley fairies were real. not a huge amount, but I hope enough to make my point- there's some people who believe in fairies so much and want them to be real so much that they think a famous prank (hoax is stretching it, imo, these girls were pranking their families and the press kind of coincidentally got involved) proves the existence of fairies.

there's a lot, lot, lot more people who believe in fairies and also will admit the cottingley fairies weren't real. the cottingley fairy truthers are a small a percentage of the people who believe in fairies.

I cannot emphasize enough that there are plenty of people who believe fairies are real and even more that could be very easily convinced that fairies are real

people have believed in fairies and been superstitious about fairies for a long, long fucking time

setting aside all of that

some people are more likely to see a thing that isn't real at their door than they are to see a living fucking walrus at their door.

fevers, migraines, mental stress, sleep deprivation (especially if you have sleep disorders, like insomnia or narcolepsy), and infection (among a very long list of other things), and prescription medication side effects can all cause visual hallucinations, and they're all states that you might not be aware that you're in when you start to see weird shit.

these are just the really mundane ones I plucked up off the list.

I have experienced hallucinations due to sleep dep and insomnia. unfortunately, for me, this manifested as a spider the size of a border collie (I wish I were joking) and not fairies, but fairies is a possibility that cannot be counted out.

I'm way more likely to have sleep deprivation and a migraine and a fever all at once than I am to see a walrus in person at a zoo, much less at my door.

it has happened before. it will happen again. it's happening right fucking now.

the fairies can have my birth name if they will take away my migraine.

just putting that out there.

I've never seen a walrus in person at all. I would like to, but it's not likely. there's not any in any of the zoos nearby that I could find.

current likelihood of me seeing a fairy on my doorstep is significantly higher than me seeing a fucking walrus. I am in a physical state where I have had visual hallucinations before, and it's not impossible I will have them again. I would not be particularly surprised, even.

as long as it's not the goddamn massive spider. I even like most spiders, but that is too much spider.

[velvetvexations]

Please correct me If I'm wrong, but didn't Playdough's whole beef with Bechdel trying to reframe her as a TERF start originally because escentially she wanted to prove that HOMESTUCK is somehow more deep and influencial and important queer media than DTWOF?? It was a poll thing and people where getting mad that homestuck was beating dtwof (this is the homestuck website like cmon) so Playdough started there the discourse of Bechdel being a terf to discredit her work

I have no idea if homestuck is actually that queer in it's content, but this incident made me realize something very common about pretentious cult-like groups like TRF and Tankies.

They want to find the way to parrot that their interests are somehow morally superior and more correct than other's; forcemem can not be just a kink it's actually a culturally significant political practice and forcemasc is just a transmisogynist bastard copy, transfem headcanons can not be just normal fandom shit for enjoyment they are the more correct and intelectual reading an analysis of any character that doesn't adhere to strict tradicional cis gender roles and transmascs headcanons are anti intelectual media illiterate misogyny, homestuck can't be just a popular old webcomic you still like despite It's flaws (like srly It has a shit ton of racism and ableism, it was created on the era of the internet 4chan was more culturally relevant than ever in memes mostly so of course) no It's not a pillar of queerness in fiction and media and the comics created by a literal feminists trans ally buch need to somehow be morally inferior because they're both compiting in a Tumblr poll

AHAHAHAHAHAHA SHE'S STILL DOING IT TOO

I'm sorry, but imagine having this much of a grudge over your fave losing a poll lmao lmao lmao lmao this is so funny oh my God.

But it's especially hilarious because all of what she wrote about June is complete nonsense that was never part of the text. Now let's look at what she had to say about transmasc headcanons:

Welcome to projection playground, ma'am! She's literally using the idea of "legitimate analysis" just to prop up her own headcanon. This is so gutbustingly hilarious. Does she even think it's possible transmascs could have headcanons based in 'legitimate analysis'? Considering the fact that she seems to vehemently insist literally every transmasc headcanon ever is actually transfem, probably not, right? Because she doesn't understand masculinity is revolutionary and transgressive for people who weren't assigned it? Because she's a self-centered moron?

But wait, there's more!

She's so consumer-brained and she doesn't even know it.

I love that her whole personality is structured around being the world's most obnoxious Homestuck fan who uses academic language to build a comfort blanket to soothe her insecurities and lash out at others because it's gender validating if she gets to lash out at trans men the way cis women are allowed to with cis men. Except I've never seen a cis woman do it this ineptly, or so blatantly the product of issues they desperately need to work out.

Anyway, back to Bechdel...

I know I've been ranting about this subject in a general, undirected way all morning, but I'm going to tell you that this is a problem with Plaidos, specifically, which she passes on to her audience:

They don't know what TERFs are.

A TERF has defined political views. There is a lot going on with them. You cannot take one belief or action in particular, such as Bechdel softly supporting some sex-segregated spaces, and call her a TERF when she's praxis in much bigger, material ways. It's not just about Homestuck with Plaidos, or TERFs in general. It's also about the fact that Bechdel ever did anything that had anything to do with the idea that some people are more wymynly than them, which they take personal offense to that overshadows, oh, I don't know, loud and consistent advocacy for children having access to HRT? Any real transfeminist would recognize that matters infinitely more. But with these people, that's not the issue. They don't care about anything but how badly it hurt them to hypothetically not be welcome to a shitty music festival, and Bechdel having went - even if she criticized it's policies - is basically the same as having flaunted her gender assignment to intentionally make them dysphoric.

But Bechdel supports minors getting HRT. She supports them being in women's bathrooms. A lot of TERFs have identical conversations about her.

So what makes her a TERF? Because she went to a party you weren't invited to?

Do you understand how pathetic this makes you look?

It's gross and TERF-y to say trans women as a category are jealous of people AFAB on some level but when you prioritize like this where being let into the club is the one big all-consuming deal over things like Bechdel repeatedly going to bat for minors having HRT, and they obsessively treat trans men the way they do...

Like, listen. TRFs. My friends. You're women. I promise you you're Trve Wymyn. Please get over not having been AFAB. Come to peace with it and accept that people who got what you want are on your side and are happy to support you in being recognized as a woman in spite of what was on your birth certificate. Get over it.

Just get over it.

And also get over your transfem headcanons not being any more textually supported than transmasc headcanons, losers. You're so obviously the ones addicted to seeing yourself reflected in every piece of media you consume if you have to write essays about how it's bad literary analysis to not believe in your strings-on-a-thumbtack-board shit and run down anyone else having headcanons related to their identity. You're not doing literary analysis, you're playing pretend with cartoons for children and getting upset when you see other people having their own fun without you.

One last thing:

EXTREMELY holy shit racist. Do you see what I mean? How TRFs care so much about slights to their Trve Wymynhood over all else that they say shit like this? Like yeah Michfest was basically the KKK, you're right, unimaginably stupid White woman. Remember when Lisa Vogel hung all those trans women to warn us not to vote?

[mnnuni]

Love confessions

Sam Winchester x Reader

Summary : Sam and reader are two idiots in love Words: 1463 Warnings: none, just a little mention of a boner the rest is fluff pining

(Y/N) wasn't one of being jealous, maybe because she wasn't particularly attached to anything in her life, because of her type of life... well, that was before the Winchesters.

Right after Sam and Dean found her in a Wendigo's cave, almost five years prior, she became one thing with them. It was funny for Dean how she was the victim but also the one who led the brothers to her: she was an excellent hunter, that was the first reason why Dean let her stay with them. The second, and more important, was the smile on his brother's face every time (Y/N) said something.

Sam was an idiot, so he never did once talk about his feelings towards (Y/N), but just because he was stupid it didn't mean he didn't got close to her, they were already together in Dean's eyes. Also because it was Dean who attended (Y/N)'s drunk love confession -the only reason she learned to control her alcohol was her fear of say something too much to Sam-

"Dean." he looked up at her "they're touching him", it was the first thing (Y/N) said after the ten minutes of Sam waiting for his drink at the bar, surrounded by girls for this all time.

Dean was having the time of his life.

"I know (Y/N)" he looked at his brother, who really didn't seem so pleased by their attention, "if they don't stop in five seconds, I'm gonna cut their hands" Dean was actually laughing now, but just because he really believed she could do it, "easy tiger" he passed her his beer and she took a big gulp still keeping her eyes on Sam. (Y/N) started breathing normally again only when Sam got up from the bar stool and made his way towards her and Dean.

"There it is, our Don Juan" if she could have, she would have smacked Dean in the head but maybe it would have be too suspicious, so (Y/N) only smiled and annouced she was going to dance.

While she made her way to the dance floor Sam wasn't able to look away from her, it was incredible her ability to make everything around her disappear at his eyes. She wasn't even wearing anything fancy, just jeans and a going out top -how she called them, he made the mistake of calling them "simple shirt" one day and never tried again- but she was so fucking beautiful.

The way her hips moved with the music, her hands that moved her hair on just one shoulder while she spared the brothers one side look that made Sam's knees go weak.

"Dear God, do something" that's when his dream stopped, Dean always did this: interrupt his perfect fantasy in which him and (Y/N) where happily together by reporting him in the real life.

"I can't" Sam sighed and turned to Dean, he was looking at him with a tired expression -he was so damn tired of their bullshit-

Turns out Sam actually could do something only few minutes later when he saw a guy approching (Y/N) on the dance floor. Dean swore he never sae him got up faster; poor guy stopped in his track before he could even put a hand on (Y/N)'s shoulder when he saw the look Sam was giving him.

(Y/N) felt him coming even before the other guy shit his pants. Sam instantly put his hands on her waist, just to make it clear for everyone they shouldn't get near her.

"I thought you were occupied" again, Sam was shook to reality and returned more conscious of the situation "nahh" he answered and tried to back away from her a little, even if it was so damn good just breath near (Y/N). She noticed his shift in behaviour and turned to face him, his phone vibrated for a text : "find company. Don't wait for me".

"Dean left, it's just me and you" (Y/N) didn't know if he sounded excited or frightened, he just looked stiff so (Y/N) put her hands on his hips "don't be so sad about it, i know you can dance just fine"

Was she flirting? Sam asked himself this question too many times.

He followed her hands movements and started to swing in sync with her "there he is" (Y/N) smiled and Sam wanted to drop to his knees right that moment; insted they danced together for enough time that (Y/N) started to believe she would actually tell him something tonight, also because she could feel his erection pressed to her ass and his will to touch her in any way possible -even if he didn't do it, just for the fear-

After quite some time (Y/N) took Sam's hand and walked him outside; he was so focused on their hands interwined together that he didn't question her for one second and he almost didn't notice they were at their motel until she opened the door.

"I need to talk to you"

It was the third time its fantasy vanished and Sam was sitting at the edge of the bed sweating his ass off in nervousness. (Y/N) dreamed of doing one big speech for this moment, but right now she only had to be the bigger person and spit it all out.

"I think I'm in love with you"

Yeah Sam was definitely dreaming, this couldn't be real.

However (Y/N) was rambling now and pacing around the room, "I think I fell in love with you the moment you gave me that ring on our first Christmas together, but really that was only the day I understood it because after the first month with you I already dreamed about you. And everytime I tried to tell you something about it you would smile and those dimples would pop up and my heart would melt and my stomach would drop that I couldn't even think straight anymore and I would always embarass myself. Safe to say I'm doing it right now also, but I can't keep it anymore, Sam" (Y/N) finally looked at him "i love you".

Sam felt like he was on another planet, his heart just shot out of his chest. (Y/N) loved him. How was that possibile he didn't know but God was she beautiful in that moment. He would have looked quite shocked, instead, because (Y/N) was waving her hand in front of his face now "mh?" "can you please say something?" (Y/N) wanted to actually die now that she confessed her love for Sam and he choose to mute himself "I-I... didn't expect this"

That's really the only thing he thought of saying?!

(Y/N) scoffed and sat next to him on the bed, "why you thought i was always so close to you?" "I-I really-" he seamed to only be able of stutter "okay, stop overthink, forget i said anything and let-" (Y/N) was getting up ready to run away and hide from him but Sam stopped her and kissed her. Well now she wasn't expecting this... Sam was actually, really kissing her. And it was so good, his lips so soft and his hands on her face so delicate yet desperate.

When they pulled away they were both panting, (Y/N) was analyzing every corner of his face to find a sign of remorse but Sam was still holding her, finding the courage to reciprocate her words.

"I love you." he whispered, like he wanted to let (Y/N) be the only one to listen to his most vulnerable self "I have loved you since the first laugh you shared with Dean at one of my terrible jokes and I'm sorry I didn't say something sooner but I never thought you could feel something for me" his hands moved to her waist to get her closer; (Y/N) smiled teasingly "then why were you rubbing your friend on me before?!" Sam became stuttering again "and also, why did you sleep with me so many times? I don't think the nightmares were the only reason" she had a big look on satisfaction on her face while she got closer and closer and Sam got quite again. Finally he sighed "all right you got me, I had a suspicion but I was...scared" he was so adorable with that blush on his cheeks "ohw my baby" now it was Sam's turn to smirk "yours?" (Y/N) didn't backed away for a moment, even with the light pink on her face "What? You think you can get away now?!" Sam raised an eyebrow "oh no pretty boy, you told me you love me, you're mine forever now" "mmh I'll be very happy to be" "good".

Sam kissed her again, this time more slowly and firmly; now he was kissing his girl, he had time to kiss her for a lifetime.

[liulith]

Sir Pentious & Alastor: an underrated dynamic

"Show yourself, Alastor! Come and face--! Oh, there you are. FACE MY WRATH!"

Sir Pentious has been in Hell for much longer than Alastor. That means he was there when the Radio Demon appeared, and he's been trying to overthrow Alastor for decades! We know what Alastor is capable of, and what he could do if he truly wanted Sir Pentious to stop. He obviously doesn't register Sir Pentious as a threat, but that doesn't mean he's not annoying (like when he interrupts his song in the pilot and destroys a wall in ep2). Yet in all those decades, Alastor always let him go with the equivalent of a slap on the wrist, considering what he's done to other sinners in his broadcasts.

And why is that? Why, he must find Sir Pentious very entertaining, of course! Even though he calls Sir Pentious forgettable (to rile him up), there's no way a narcissist like him doesn't LOVE being the main focus of Pentious' "evil plans", as pathetic as they are. Not only does he give him the attention he deserves (like Vox), he's a true "architect of evil" who constantly reinvents himself to try and get the upper hand on Alastor. To Alastor, Pentious is like a sillier, weaker, more immature version of Vox with close to ZERO survival instincts but twice the creativity. Even Vox, who made a whole diss track about Al, wouldn't dare speak to him the way Sir Pentious does if they were face to face.

"SILENCE! Now cower! For when I've ssslain you, the almighty Vees will finally acknowledge me as their equal."

He does have some "oh shit" moments when he sees he crossed a line/is about to get Team Rocket-ed, but he still gets back up and attacks him again with all the unearned confidence of a man who has no idea how easy Alastor goes on him.

Just like Alastor, Pentious is attached to the aesthetics and technology of the time period he knew when he was alive, and still manages to innovate with those limitations. I think Alastor could respect that.

"You whores have no class! In war, the side remembered is the side with the most style!"

It's also funny that to Pentious, Alastor is the young, modern one. Some phrases Alastor uses are "young people slang" to him!

Pentious asking Alastor questions on his "modern" radio technology...

Alastor is one sarcastic bastard, and Sir Pent is one of the most naive characters in the show. He takes a lot of things way too literally (#autism?). That's just PERFECT for comedic misunderstandings between these two!

Before s1 was released there were quite a lot of ace!Pentious headcanons. I think we could still make a case for closeted ace-adjacent!Pentious in canon! Possibility even aroace!Pentious, if we interpret his crush on Cherri as compulsive heteronormativity (he loves her creative genius and is fascinated by her explosive contraptions; surely that means she's the one, right?)

Ace4Ace Alastor & Pentious would be a fun duo in my opinion. They could bond over their shared experience

On the topic of bonding... ("I have feelings for you" (Narrator voice: the feeling was friendship, but he had ever experienced it before)

Seriously, imagine Sir Pentious spending more and more time around Alastor because of the hotel, taking his sarcastic and mocking remarks literally and thinking they're becoming closer... And then being like. WAIT. Do I have feelings for him?? and trying to seduce him like he does with Cherri Bomb. The absolute shenanigans... Rizzlord Pentious strikes again.

Accidental fake dating scenario that only exists in Vox's head, where Vox, being the stalker that he is, spies in the two of them bonding and reaches all the wrong conclusions

Once Sir Pentious dies for the second time and ascends to Heaven, he could meet Alastor's mom 👀

EDIT: OH and How could I forget the Egg Boiz?? Egg Boiz babysitter!Alastor is canon and he definitely babysat them multiple times in the few months Sir Pentious spent at the hotel. Joint custody :3

AND let's not forget the important information that Frank the Egg Boy reported to Sir Pentious lol. The one Charlie made a deal with Alastor for. I can imagine Alastor considering killing the Egg Boiz/ Sir Pentious after learning Frank didn't keep quiet (Imagine Sir Pentious trying to engage in a conversation w/ Alastor and telling him what Frank told him as a joke akfkkd), spending a whole afternoon trailing after them and making plans, only to realise that the Egg Boiz say insane shit all the time and Sir Pentious was in fact NOT playing 4D chess by telling him he knew (and probably already forgot all about it)

[acciocriativity]

-> | You're on the quieter side | Ateez Reaction (Maknae Line)

Context: For all of these reactions, the scenario is the same. They're hanging out as a friend group (OT8 + reader), talking about life and getting to know each other more, since reader is new around all of them as a group.

Genre: fluff

Warnings/tags: mentions of eating and drinking alcohol; mentions of shyness; chaotic and loud Ateez

N/a: First of all, I'm so sorry for how late this is, I'm on my finals so I'm slower as it gets rn.

Second of all, my requests are open!

Reblogs and comments are highly appreciated! Thank you for reading my work (^o^)

Ateez Masterlist

Hyung Line version

Choi San (최산): he'd listen to your EVERY word

Everyone knew you, you were Seonghwa's friend, and sometimes you picked him up at the dorms to hang out, since he can't drive for shit. But that night was the first time you would have dinner with them, and Seonghwa did the most to give you a good impression of his friends.

And it did work, ok? It worked for some time, until they felt comfortable enough with you to let loose, which didn't take long with alcohol involved.

But the thing about San and alcohol is that he is a lightweight, there's no sugarcoating that, and everyone knows it, one shot and he's drunk already.

He didn't even realized it he was staring at you with the biggest and most attentive shining eyes, with red cheeks and a soft smile, and honestly? It was too funny for them to stop him, instead the boys were betting on how long I'll take him to fall off his chair, since he was leaning so much to the right to see you better.

Sometimes your tone was so soft that he couldn't hear what you said, since the talking wouldn't stop. So he would wait for your eyes to meet his, and he would whisper to you: "What?", while he tilted his head to the side, blinking slowly.

And if you tried to brush it off, because it wasn't that important, he would have the biggest pout, and would keep pestering you. So in the end, you'll both have your whispered drunk conversation apart from everyone else.

It was hard not to take one or two photos of you two, Seonghwa had to find the strength within him, because it was just sooo adorable. You better be prepared to be teased relentlessly tomorrow though, he wasn't that nice.

Song Mingi (송민기): he'd treat you like an old friend

What to say about Song Mingi? Even though he can be shy around strangers, or in this case, acquaintances like you, he doesn't care enough NOT to be himself, specially when he has his friends, and some drinks around.

So there you are, thinking you'll be chilling in San's dorm for a while, drink a bit, and then go home to your night routine and 7-hour-sleep, since it's usually like that when you are only with San. But, oh you were mistaken...

If they were a chaotic group, then Mingi was the chaos himself, and he didn't have to try at all. It reached a point, where you were asking yourself why haven't you got close to him before? Oh, right. You were too shy to do that, so much so, that San adopted you as his designed introverted friend, being introverted himself. That's how you ended up where you were in the first place.

But Mingi was the opposite of that. He was loud and a tiny bit crazy, it was like there wasn't a single drop of shame in his body. You really wished to be like that someday, he got your respect really fast that night.

And although you didn't speak up much, he noticed how you were laughing along with everyone, but instead of laughing at him for his silliness like the boys were, you were laughing with him, almost tearing up as the hours went by, and that's something he truly appreciates, someone with the same sense of humor as him.

That's it, that was the moment he decided he was going to adopt you as his friend too. You didn't even noticed the moment he sat beside you on the big couch, right after leaving the kitchen with a new bottle of soju. You were distracted listening to the tea Wooyoung was spilling to everyone.

"I bet they were lying that day, and were together behind his back", he commented by your side.

You gasped, since that though didn't even crossed your mind. He laughed at your wide shocked eyes.

"There's no way, she seemes to like him so much..."

By the end of the night, the two of you were gossipping like no other. Your friendship by the end of the night seemed so natural, like it was meant to be, and guess who was pouty walking you home? Yeah, Choi San. You had to remind him he was THE best friend in your eyes.

Jeong Wooyoung (정우영): he'd make everyone listen to you

Oh, this one is a mouthy one, and he's not afraid for his life.

You were already familiar with Wooyoung, since Yeosang was an old friend of yours, so of course you met here and there, although not enough for you to outright talk to him without Yeosang. Why? Besides the fact that you were shy, Yeosang had this same phrase, almost a saying at this point, for when some of them asked to hang out with both of you.

"I have to keep her from getting her innocence destroyed by you guys, you're not a good influence", he told you what he said to San two weeks ago.

Of course, he left out the part where San called him out, since he wasn't that innocent at all for starters, but does it even matter now? They got what they wanted. You came to their dorms for a movie night.

"You, keep... all of this in control today", Yeosang emphasized the "all of this" as he gestured towards San's whole body.

"Or what?", it was San's immediate reaction as he smirked up to Yeosang.

Yeosang could only give him a death glare.

San planned to be on his best behavior already, since he already knew you were smiliar to Yeosang, but it was just SO good to tease him, he couldn't stop himself.

"Or I'll bite your arms off", Wooyoung suddenly said as he sat down on the couch by San's side.

And to further prove his point, he leaned in San's right arms and threatened to bite it.

"OK, ok, stop it", San said, while shoving Wooyoung away from him.

It ended there, and no one took note of Wooyoung's protectiveness towards you at first. It's hard to tell if he just wanted a reason to be annoying or if was genuine, you know? But it got clear as the night went on, he was like your bodyguard.

If you said anything, and for some reason they didn't hear it, since they wouldn't just ignore you, he would just...

"YAH, they were speaking", he yelled looking at Mingi, who stopped munching his pizza with wide eyes.

The first time it happened, you were caught off guard, trying to brush it off what you said yourself. But did he let you? Please, of course not.

"What were you saying?", he'd ask with such a gentle voice towards you, a little smile in the corner of his mouth, while he looked you in the eyes.

It was... different to say the least.

The more that happened, the more it became a joke whitin the group.

By the end of the night, you saved his number as "the bodyguard" on your phone, but he whined so much that you added a little white heart by the side of it, and he was pretty proud of himself.

Choi Jongho (최종��): he'd look out for you quietly (or so he thinks)

If anyone asked you what is your opinion about Jongho, you would probably lie, and say you don't know him much to have an opinion. You thought he was so cool, and so fucking intimidating, and you couldn't even tell why, but you couldn't hold his stare.

It wasn't like he was scary, none of them were, there was more chance of you being the scary one, truly. But he had that energy around him, he was just calm, collected, but also fun, knew how to entertain in a way that seemed so natural? At the same time, he didn't go out of his way to speak or anything, he chose when he wanted to say or do something. Maybe that was intimidating to you, he was self-assured. And oh God, how you wished to be more like that.

You tried to be discreet as you observed him, and the rest of the boys chaotic conversation. He was just as quiet as you at that moment, also highly entertained, with his arms crossed close to his chest.

He thought you didn't really like him or something. You were a bit hard to read, and he didn't want to make things even more uncomfortable by talking about it to you, but he really didn't get why you didn't like him, since you barely talked to each other alone.

He looked your way for a moment, as you were laughing at Hongjoong glaring at Wooyoung, while playing uno. Both you and him were out this round, so everyone could play. He chucked as Hongjoong picked up more 4 cards, he already had 10 at this point.

"Someone's gonna be dead by the end of this round, I feel it", he heard you whisper to Seonghwa, who was playing right in front of you.

He watched as Seonghwa laughed quietly, and nodded, while showing you his cards. He had a proud grin on his face, he had some good cards, and he was right beside Hongjoong.

He wanted to talk to you like that, in a free and friendly manner, but he can't make himself do it. What if you don't like him even more after it? Should he just ask you what's up? No, not in front of ev-

Jongho's mind stopped working for a second. Now, you were eyeing one of the drinks on the table, right beside him. So what does he do? He hands you one of them, of course, and takes one for himself.

It seemed like nothing to everyone, including for you, but for Jongho it was the solution.

For the rest of the night, whenever you said you want something? Jongho's got it for you. You ask for someone to grab the bottle of water for you? It's Jongho. You say you're gonna grab more snacks? He's on it. Do you suggest a movie? He's the first one to vote for it. And of course, he makes it like it's no big deal, he's being himself, but you noticed his efforts.

By the end of the night, you felt bad for the way you kind of ignored him before, so you sent him a text message after you left, baby steps, ok? Baby steps. But you apolagize, thank him, and after that you can only hope to be closer to him for now on.

[pigcowboys]

About the confession fic.

PLEASE IM STARVING FOR IT.

Thank you.

Ps.( I need more percy headcanons from you they're so good LORD YOURE AMAZING).

pairing: percy jackson x gn! reader

summary: part 2 to this fic part 3

warning(s): blood, injuries, rough housing, cursing, SLIGHT jealousy, unresolved feelings whoops.. & mutual pining (they're just a little slow..)

a/n: HAHAH TYSMMM <33!! i wanna write more so badly but so much is going on with school i just haven't found the time.. :( (i have something in the works actually!!)

"are you okay?"

you jumped at the sound of grover's voice, waving his concerns off with a dismissive 'just fine'. and you were, for the most part at least. or as fine as you could be with the camp currently split in two on account of the disappearance of the young nico di angelo.

you weren't especially close with him - well, not as close as he would've been with his late sister. though, you had your fair share of moments with him.

while percy was away from camp on his quest with everyone else, you became to unofficial babysitter for the boy. taking on the role you assumed his sister had to play for him during the time they were together. and it was fun. you didn't have any siblings of your own so the thought of having your very own younger one just dropped at your feet was awesome to you.

well, it was till percy and the others came back and nico's seemingly never ending cheerfulness faded with the information of his sister's untimely death. it's things like that which reminded you of why being a half-blood was so dangerous.

she didn’t deserved to die that young - shit, nobody deserved to die that young..and in that way?

it's so..fucked.

"do you know when they said they'd be back?" you asked grover, turning to look at him since the first time you began to speak. he gave you an unsure shrug. "mm..soon? i'm not too sure," he turned to look past the camp entrance. " i wouldn't worry about it though, they'll be fine."

"you'd be surprised the amount of shit percy can get himself into.." you said to nobody at all. grover seemed put of by your uncharacteristic brooding. he spared you a glance before parting ways with you to do whatever it is he had to. you didn't want to do anything right now but sleep.

for whatever reason you'd taken it upon yourself to try your best to help out with every single thing you could around the camp, touring new comers, cleaning the pegasus stables - you even assisted the stoll brothers in cleaning the hermes cabin after someone (travis) had let a couple of gerbils loose in there as a prank.

it wasn't funny. you glared daggers at travis for weeks.

maybe you were trying to preoccupy yourself or maybe you genuinely felt like helping - you weren't sure. or maybe you just missed..something.. or maybe someone? you looked towards the front entrance.

yeah..you did.

you hadn't gotten any time to think about the weird interaction the two of you shared a few weeks ago yet, it was always fresh in your mind somehow. percy was so weird. it felt like since that day you'd started to see him less and less than before. could you believe it? this guy, someone you considered to be your best friend had been blowing you off!

what a dick.

worst part was the fact that whenever you did see him, he was almost always with annabeth. annabeth, annabeth, annabeth. i mean, they couldn't of even asked you if you wanted to hang out? why were they always together? always whispering to each other and avoiding eye contact when you'd meet their prodding gaze. it was so weird..

the last straw had to be when you'd overheard them talking one time. you didn't mean to eavesdrop, you just heard your name in passing and it instantly grabbed your attention.

"so..you're going to do it?" annabeth asked

"i guess."

"come on! don't be like that - you're going to scare her off if you're not passionate. about it"

"do girls..like passion?"

"obviously! you have to make her feel important." annabeth tutted. "you guys never get these kinds of things."

"you sound like one of the hunters.."

"hm?"

"nothing."

why were they talking about girls? did percy have his eye on someone? is that why he was avoiding you? he..liked someone and didn't want to tell you. but, he told annabeth about it.. and not you? you were offended - very offended. how dare he not share his feelings with you! the nerve of some people. it wasn't the fact he didn't tell you that hurt the most, it was the fact he'd told someone else before you. why was this the way you had to find that out? who else did percy tell..?

the idea of it all flooded your thoughts and refused to leave it for days after days. it might've been the real reason you were brooding so much. you stopped dead in your tracks as you looked over yonder. ares campers, and they seemed like they were preparing for something. your breath caught in your throat as they noticed you, a sneer forming onto their faces as they made a beheading motion, dragging their thumb across their neck in a threatening manner.

oh wow, capture the flag. your favorite.

"is too late to run back to my cabin?" you asked nervously, lacing your boots before standing up groggily. percy turned to look at you with a frown. "you gonna be okay?" you didn't spare him a glance, opting to fix your breastplate properly as you stared ahead.

"yeah, i guess." the corners of your lips curled as you made eye contact with another ares camper nearby who seemed to stare you down like a fresh piece of meat. your stomach turned as you clutched your shield tighter, exhaling shakily.

percy stared at you silently, looking forward at the line of campers then back to you. you turned to face him when you felt his hand brush against your own. he didn't react to your head turning, only leaning forward to grab your hand and hold it tightly.

you looked down at where your hands were clasped together then back to percy. he looked back you, a shaky smile making it's way onto his lips as he squeezed your hand tighter.

"for reassurance," he explained, lips tugging into a small smile. you nodded like you understood what he was doing, turning back to face in front as you tried your best to stay focused on not dying.

as so as the match started you were almost hit with an arrow, courtesy of the apollo campers, you concluded. your shoes scrapped the ground as you ran for cover, mud caking onto your shoes as your legs went as fast a they could.

you could hear yells and chants behind you as you dodged the botany of the forest, ducking down to hide behind a larger looking log as you waited for the opposing team to run past. your lungs hurt and you were pretty sure that arrow had just barely missed your face because there seemed to be a small slash on the side of your right cheek. as the sound of the footsteps grew farther and farther you moved out again, running past the log as you made your way to the East Woods.

A hushed whisper of your name caught your attention as you took notice of Annabeth who seemed to be trying to blend in with the surrounding woods.

"jeez, are you trying to get killed?" her eyebrows furrowed. "those ares campers are betting on this match." she rolled her eyes. "those brutes, you'd think they'd try to have some kind of sympathy for the people they hurt." she seemed to ramble on about something under her breath to which you did not hear nor care to even hear.

"where's percy?"

annabeth gave you a look. "i don't know," she looked to her right wearily. "i thought he was with you."

something in your stomach stirred. you'd just seen percy at the start of the match..what happened..? you frowned, moving from annabeth's hiding spot as you planted yourself onto the ground once more, equipping yourself with your weapon once more as you held it close to your chest.

"what do you think you're doing?" annabeth exclaimed. "you can't be out in the open like this, there's barely any cover. you'll be attacked."

"everywhere in this forest is the open."

"you know what i mean." annabeth sighed. "look, i've got a plan but, for to work we've gotta wait a little, okay?"

"what plan?"

"i can't tell you all of it right now." she frowned. "just follow my lead.."

you weren't too trusting of annabeth's plan yet you complied, following after her as she moved from her hiding spot, meticulously through the forest. she was quick on her feet and you tried your best to follow her example but it was harder to recreate with your mud ridden sneakers.

it happened quick, you barely registered the sound of a flurry of arrows being set off at you and annabeth, the two of you ducking out of the way as you took to your feet sloppily, running for your lives. your heart pounded as the sound of 4 different pairs of feet chased after you. annabeth panted harshly as she looked around in a flurry, grabbing your wrist as she made a sharp turn right into the weapon of an ares camper.

they raised their sword and swung down viciously without restraint. your shield was barely able to block the attack, swinging back as you put distance between the camper and annabeth. she seemed shaken up but still readied her weapon, steadying her helmet on her head.

you stared at the ares camper with furrowed eyebrows. "is it true you guys are betting on us..?"

he didn't reply, rushing forward to swing. your shield cushioned the blow yet the rather old material seemed to shatter slightly under the weight of the swing. what the hell did these campers eat?

you threw your shield to the side, backing away steadily as you steadied yourself. annabeth stepped forward as well, swinging at the camper with precision, trying her best to block the harsh slashes. you tried to catch your breath, bringing your hand to your chest as you raised up your head shakily.

you merely stepped forward for a minute when another camper rushed towards you, knocking into your body with full force as you flew to the side, slamming against the tree face first. your nerves could barely register the pain as your collapsed onto your side, falling right onto your right arm.

you cried out in pain, reach forward to clutch your arm as blood smeared against the sleeves of your clothes. you curled into yourself as your body grew heavier and heavier. you could remember the faint sound of yelling before you finally blacked out, losing consciousness.

you woke up gods knows how much later in the infirmary. your ears were ringing and your chest hurt. how long had you been in here? a few hours? a few days even? you looked around the room wearily, nobody else had been inside - it was practically empty. you tried to stand up but took notice of the fact your arm was bandaged.

what exactly happened..?

the door to the infirmary swung open, gaining your attention as your head snapped towards the figure that opened it. your eye widened slightly when you locked eyes with percy. he seemed surprised you were awake, his eyes glinting with a spark of concern.

"hey.."

"hey." you two said in unison. silence fell over the two of you as percy idled in front of your bed for a moment before pulling up a chair and placing it near your bed, sitting down on it as he gazed at you with worry.

"did you just wake up?" percy asked, trying to seem normal.

"sadly," you exhaled. "i would've liked to sleep a little longer."

"well, you were out for a while." percy said absentmindedly. "i - uh, we were kind of worried about you."

"thanks." you smiled slightly, raising your head to peer at what it was he was holding in your hands. "what's that?"

"ambrosia," percy replied, fishing out a small cube from the pouch. he held it towards your mouth, waving it around slightly as he waited for you to lean forward and bite it.

"you know i can feed myself, right?"

percy frowned. "why can't you just let me be nice?"

you didn't reply, shuffling forward as you opened your mouth, allowing percy to slip the treat into your mouth. your mouth swirled with the best flavor imaginable as you sunk into your bed with a sigh, turning your head to the side to gaze at percy who looked at you wearily.

"how long was out for?"

"pretty long, you broke your arm and a few other things when you fell," he tucked the pouch into his hoodie pocket. "those ares campers are so.."

"insane. can't believe they were betting on people's lives." your eyebrows furrowed. "isn't that fucked?"

percy hummed in response and the two of you grew quiet again. you stole a glance at percy taking notice of the slight eyebags on his face and the redness of his nose.

"annabeth told me everything," he paused. "i'm sorry i wasn't there."

you shrugged. "it was no big deal, i mean, i'm still alive, right?"

percy leaned forward in his chair, bringing his elbow to rest on the cover of your bed, bracing his head in his palm. "yeah but," he paused. "i don't know what i would've done if you didn't manage to bounce back." you stared at him quietly as he seemed to zone out.

"i don't know what i'd do with myself if you ever got hurt."

your eyes widened as you registered his words, your lips curling upwards. so, maybe he didn't hate you.. you sat up in your bed slowly, bracing against the pillow you were resting on as you turned your body towards percy.

"that's not gonna happen," you paused. "..again." percy smiled yet still looked slightly distressed about the whole situation. you reached out to cup his cheek, a teasing smile pulling at your lips as you stretched them outward as far as you could.

"hey man, don't worry - i'm going to be fine, stop brooding now."

percy grunted rebuttals in response, exhaling when you finally released his face with a tired giggle, readjusting yourself to lay down on your bed as you settled in with a hum. percy rubbed his cheek soothingly, leaning forward to admire you.

you didn't register he was staring at you till you turned to your side and locked eyes with him, heart beating in your chest as the two of you stared at each other in silence. percy broke the eye contact, placing his hand on yours that laid still on the bed as he interlocked them.

you gave him a quizzical look as you squeezed his hand.

"it's for me." percy smiled sheepishly. "i wanna know that you're okay."

you didn't say anything only smiling to yourself as you closed your eyes, slowly fading out of consciousness as you dozed off clutching percy's hand.

[ninyard]

last but most certainly not least. pt 3 of the bonus chapters (TKM)

Aaron's chapter (once again going to be putting like. the whole thing here.)

One of these days Aaron would love to know what about that mouthy liar had people bending over backwards for him [...] He could waste his time being angry, or he could go the tried-and-true Minyard route of infuriating everyone else around him.

i love how much he despises neil fr. and the Minyard route???? i love that

"Hey, Bee," Aaron said.

why did this like. give me such nathaniel neil vibes. hes so cunty for this im obsessed

Andrew looked relaxed where he was tucked into the corner of the couch, one knee hugged loosely to his chest, but Aaron wasn't fooled. They were twins: there was too much of them in each other despite all the years they'd spent apart.

one) andrew is so cosy <333 two) ouch. THERE WAS TOO MUCH OF THEM IN EACH OTHER DESPITE ALL THE YEARS THEY'D SPENT APART????? literally screaming into a pillow at this one

"Did you know Andrew's fucking Neil?" [...] Andrew cut in with a flat, "I'm not." Andrew wouldn't waste his breath lying when Aaron was right here to argue with him, but Aaron knew his accusation wasn't far off the mark. [...] That Andrew hadn't sealed the deal yet was the least important detail, but Aaron was willing to be an ass about it.

I love that andrew is banking on the technicality that like. no he's not. they haven't. and aaron saying andrew hadn't "sealed the deal" has me SCREAMING. thats so funny

"Go slash some tires, or whatever it is you do for fun."

HES SO FUNNYYY

"You made him a priority," Aaron said. "[...] but for the record, I think he's an insufferable asshole. [...] Exy this, Exy that, get a fucking hobby. Oh, but i guess he did?" He sent a pointed look at Andrew.

GET A FUCKING HOBBY. aaron minyard i'd die for you.

"You know, I asked him about you. I asked him if he was taking advantage of you. He tried to punch me out." "You bring out that urge in people," Andrew said.

i'm so glad that we know now that andrew knows about this interaction. like i wonder how he felt hearing that.

"Betsy and I were talking about Monday." [...] Andrew hadn't called her "Betsy" in over a year. He'd never seen Andrew so hard on a back foot, and it was as terrifying as it was thrilling. [...] Andrew didn't want to talk about Neil with Dobson because once he broached that subject he either had to lie to all of them or admit Neil was more important that he wanted him to be.

throwing up, literally no words just throwing up

"I like Neil's promise ring, by the way."

AARONNNNN. HIS PROMISE RING. PLEASE. and also the "Matching set, very cute." why is he so funny

Andrew's smile was all ice, and he wielded honesty like a knife. "They're not decorative, you ignorant little shit. Someone like you wouldn't understand the importance of hiding scars." [...] Aaron would have to figure it out later, but not now. Andrew was trying to pull him off track and [...] he'd never find his way back if he followed it to whatever ugly truth Andrew was hiding. He forced Andrew words aside to haunt him later

this just made me wonder if there's every going to be a moment where aaron figures out what this means. like. my stomach feels sick thinking about it just him having this moment where it clicks and makes sense and he realises what andrew's hiding and will they ever be able to have that conversation?????

"It bother you your pet project is queer?"

AARON

"I'm not always okay with what he is, but these days it's less that he's gay it's that he's [...] weaponized it. It took him so long to come to terms with it that now he lashes out first, pushing as hard as he can to figure out who's safe and who isn't."

nicky baby :(( why does this make me so sad

"I don't care that you're gay, and I don't care that you picked the literal most irritating person on the planet to fall for. I care that you're being a hypocrite."

Aaron Minyard #1 neil josten hater.

Andrew was picking idly at his jeans: an agitated tic that had mostly disappeared once his medicine was out of his system. [...] Maybe he needed a few more moments to come to terms with their easy acceptance. [...] Finding out how important he was to Andrew was an ongoing, eye-opening experience. Finding out just how important Dobson was, that Andrew wouldn't risk her unfavourable opinion by telling her the truth about his sexuality, was equally fascinating. [...] She truly mattered to Andrew when so few people did anymore.

once again andrew :((( my boy :((( why am i crying

"I love Katelyn. I love her more than anything. I want to spend the rest of my life with her, but I am trying so goddamned hard to wait until graduation because you asked me to. So why aren't you doing the same?" "You have abysmal taste in girls," Andrew told him.

KATEAARON YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS TO MEEE

"Neurosurgeon, right?" [...] He and [his mother] had been watching a medical drama with dinner while Andrew hovered silent and distant in the doorway, and Aaron had foolishly said, I want to do that. His mother laughed him out of the room for daring to think he could make anything of himself."

one) andrew talking about aaron to bee two) andrew being the only person who remembered or knew he wanted to be a neurosurgeon three) his mom laughing at him :(( for daring the think he could make anything of himself???? what the fuck and also andrew signing to the team for aaron's sake to get him through college to follow his dreams??? sobbing

"I'm trying, okay? I'm trying. Years too late, I know, but you refused me first. I begged you to come home with me. You can't blame me for not trusting you." "I am capable of multitasking," Andrew said. Aaron heard what he didn't say: I blame us both.

SDHFGAOLFGAJRDHGJDF

"She's just another tiny skirt here to use him up and distract him from what he wants."

ANDREW

"My hands are full with too many idiots," Andrew said. "When she shows her true colors, I will not have the energy to put him together again."

one) liar. i know you'd go to the ends of the earth again and again and again for him. two) TOO MANY IDIOTS

"You can't be brothers while you are each other's jailors."

:D screaming

"Says the man dating a mafioso." "I'm not dating him," Andrew said, with a hint of impatience. Aaron saw right through him, and it was enough to make him smile as he turned his gaze out the window. "Liar."

sobbing. they love each other so much and Andrew is such a liar and i can't deal with them. they kill me

[krispycreamcake]

Reiji's perfect gift

From author: I'm gonna try just a tiny different writing style today sooo enjoy

Edit: I'M GOING TO KILL MYSELF OH MY GODDDDDDD I POSTED THIS BY ACCIDENT AND TRIED TO CNP IT BEFORE I DELETED IT BUT IT ONLY GOT LIKE ONE SENTENCE. I AM LEAVING THE EARTH.

"Mmmm... That's- hnng- good..." I grunted out in relief as I felt their gentle fingers easily glide across my aching muscle, pulling and tugging until I could no longer hold in my voice. Just the feeling of them on my skin made me instantly fall into a state of relaxation and pleasure.

Once they were done, I rose up from the bed and rolled my shoulders. "Thank you, I do appreciate it." The words left my mouth as if butter had been smeared all over my lips. I turned around to face them, looking into their eyes. I wish I could've stayed longer but I had important duties that couldn't be dismissed.

Truth be told, I've been certainly stressed out these past few days with the events father had planned for us. Convincing my no good brothers was hard enough as it is to attend, but making sure they don't make a fool of the Sakamaki name would be the harder issue at play.

"Reiji? You're kinda zoning out, you ok?" I heard their voice and immediately snapped my attention back to them. I cupped their face with a gloved hand and grazed their cheek with my thumb. "It's nothing you should be worrying about. I'm just focusing on making sure everything turns out the way father expects it to." They quirk an eyebrow at me before giggling.

"What's so funny?" I ask. "Well if things turn out the way he expects it to, then wouldn't that be a disaster?" I grin as the joke registers to me. As much as I do appreciate the humour, it was just another reminder that without me, this family would completely fall apart.

"I suppose you're right. Truly I couldn't imagine them being on any kind of behaviour, so it'll be hard to make sure they're even on their best one." They look at me a bit despondent as if they know what has to happen now. "Goodnight. I do hope you have a good rest, if you need me, you know where to find me."

I watch as their hands grab onto mines, not saying a word. It would be so easy to ignore what must be done and just stay here with them, but I'm afraid that that's just not in my character. "Don't look so troubled, you'll feel my fangs soon enough."

"I watch as their expression changes from one of surprise to embarrassment. What a predictable human. "I assume that's why you're so against letting me go no?" As their unbelievable fibs reach my ears, I can't help but think about how I'm only wasting more time. I say my farewells and immediately head to the game room to check on my brothers.

"Really Ayato, you never fail to disappoint me." I watch as he freezes in his spot, pool table clutched in hand. "Shit.... Reiji." I sigh before crossing my arms. "I don't expect anything from you other than to slack off, but even then you prove to me time and time again that you cannot be trusted with anything. You can't even set an example for your younger brothers! You agreed to come to the gathering and claimed that you had read the event's guidelines, yet here you are lazing off and playing games! You understand the severity of your situation don't you? Of all of us? We are to present the family's greatest accomplishments over the years and yet we have nothing to show for it."

I fix my glasses as my voice grows Stern and tense. "Tch- why don't ya take that damn stick outta your ass and have fun for once? Isn't today supposed to be your special day?" If I didn't have more important things to attend to, I'd slap that imprudent little boy across his face. Where does he honestly get the audacity to speak to me of all people like that?

"You know that as vampires, our birthdays are rather pointless and tiresome to celebrate. I am not some weak mortal that needs to be pitied for having gained another year to my age. Kanato, your advanced math class is having a meet-up tomorrow, you will be attending. Laito, I've arranged for you to be giving a tour in the demon world where you'll be teaching others about our history and culture, all your notes and resources are on your desk. Ayato, you have been designated to attend tomorrow's ball along with Subaru. You all have your work cut out for you so I don't expect anyone to be slacking off."

They luckily knew I wasn't asking but still, neither seemed pleased to be bossed around. "I think I'd rather die than have an old guy like you tell me what to do you know." Laito spoke with firm determination, I could see it in his face and sense it in his voice, no matter how smooth of a tone he may put on.

"These are not my wishes, I am simply carrying out our duties and making sure you low-lives don't drag the Sakamaki name through mud." I quickly spat back at him. Why must they oppose every single thing I say? I'm doing this for them! I sigh before taking my leave.... Until I heard Kanato murmur something under his breath.

I snapped my head towards him. "Speak up, it's rude to mumble, you're no longer a child anymore Kanato." I watched as Kanato looked at the floor, fiddling with that teddy bear of his before finally speaking up with such dead eyes.

"Teddy and I think that you should just leave if everything's such a bother to you.... You don't care about us anyway, but I can't say that we all don't feel the same! Uuu..... You want to abandon us, leave us here to rot!" I was almost taken aback before Kanato started to sniffle and cry like a child that lost its mother.

I once again adjusted my glasses before giving them all a stern look. I head back to my room to review the letters we received after a certain good-for-nothing let them stack up without informing anyone that they were delivered in the first place.

Just as I climbed the stairs, I immediately noticed that they were there. Watching perhaps? Sometimes I just don't know what's going on with that person after it seems like I have everything figured out. "It's highly unbecoming to ease drop on other's conversations."

I chuckle as I watch them jump in surprise. I grabbed their hand before giving their wrist a slap with my index and middle fingers. They wince at the jolt of pain before yanking their arm away. But something wasn't right.... Their usual playful stature in moments like these, was replaced with what I could only concur as annoyance and anger.

"Is something the matt-" My ears were immediately assaulted by a loud berating. "How could you not tell me it was your birthday??? Are you insane?? We spent the entire day doing nothing! I could've made you a cake or something or- or I don't know! Get you a present at least! You told me 'not to worry about it' when I asked because it didn't matter!"

My face drops and I feel exasperation creep up on me. "Is that what this is all about? I believe you heard my explanation when I was speaking to Ayato, I won't repeat myself because you refuse to listen to anything that isn't what you want to hear. I've explained before that I'm busy, so if you don't mind, I'll be taking my leave."

I walk past them before things could escalate more. I tried to remain as composed as I could but everyone seemed to be additionally unintelligent today. Truth be told, I couldn't care less! My birthday? Ha..... What a joke, it should be forgotten and buried with that woman.

I turn the knob on my door and see my room in the state of a pigsty. I hurriedly closed the door as it let out a small slam. "Hm, it seems I've let this place get the best of me. I don't have time for tidying right now..... I need to-" I don't know what overtook me, or perhaps I did, but I slid down the wall and thre my head back, tears streaming down my face. What a fool I've been, running around catering to others and I shut them out when they try to do the same.

"Yes?" I look down to see them... But not just them. The triplets are outside as well and Subaru even. A warm yellow glow was radiating off of their face. Candles that were stuck inside a strawberry shortcake.... My eyes grew wide as I realized. I didn't say a word as I opened the door for all of them to come in. Ayato was the second to bolt inside holding a bottle of wine.

It's that damn person's fault! Ever since they got here, they've made my life hell! Their outrageous tendencies to check in on me, to care for me, to hold me! How could they..... Make me see my own flaws, make me feel this way? I hear a knock on the door and immediately stand up, drying my eyes and taking a second to breathe before opening it.

"Happy birthday dear Reiji~ happy birthday to you!" I unintentionally gave a small smile as I listen to all their uneven voices try to sing in harmony, it was absolutely awful. But I can't say I didn't enjoy it nonetheless. "Thank you all.... And I'm assuming this was your idea?" I asked them.

They tried to be humble but I knew they really enjoyed the praise they got from me. I opened the bottle of wine and poured everyone a glass, using the ones I keep locked away in my room. They all seemed surprised to see me bringing them out.

I can't remember how many drinks we'd all had, but when they kissed me.... I can't explain it. It was more sweet than any blood that I've ever tasted, more delicate than the finest of pastries. In fact, if it wasn't for that kiss, I don't think I'd recall that night at all.

I feel a presence behind me and before I could see who it was, they left. The only thing to indicate that there was someone there in the first place, was a small store bought card with the words 'happy birthday' written on it in an ugly font with bright colours. "Hmph, you really are good for nothing."

[chasedeys]

I instantly thought of you when I heard him say “we locked our eyes”, would you like to share your thoughts on that? Please?

hi hello ���� WHY i mean SURE but WHY 😭 is it because i yap too much on these two oh god you guys I'm so sorry

i fear i don't actually have much to say other than it just being pure joemarr usual bullshit of being so in tune with each other's bullshit that they just 'don't need words' and understand each other so perfectly well that joe can just do the griddy instantly and ja'marr follows suit without pausing and do the celly with him and and laugh at his stupid ass doing that shit so badly in front of so many people when i'm pretty sure joe has refused to do the griddy so many times before 😭😭 though then again this is just the usual scoring-then-team-celly thing lmaooo even if nobody else (but tee in the back from afar!) followed suit but it is special because joe burrow is doing ja'marr chase's trademark celly!! (the idea that people point at ja'marr to do the griddy to his face in various degrees of proficiency is still so funny to me I'm sorry mike gesickis point and griddy is still ingrained in my fucking head 😭 then grants griddy after sacking joe too oughughguh stop)

IT'S LIKE SO CUTE TO ME THOUGH maybe it's just because ja'marr was the closest one running to him and reaching him first so joe looked to him first and joe was all a bit awkward with the ball lmao he was holding it and looking and circling around like what the fuck do i do now with my celly and!! he said he locked eyes!! with ja'marr!!!! for help!!!!!!! ja'marr shrugging at him like 'what do you wanna do now' giving him the spotlight it's your moment what kind of celly do you wanna do i'm right here with you hyping you up no doubt about it and there's ja'marr right there in front of him of course he's going to embarrass the ever living shit out of himself doing the fucking griddy so soooo badly (i remember him doing it in the nfl is post saints game in that tunnel looking towards ja'marr too!!!!! insane. only doing the griddy looking at ja'marr. crazy. and also post afc north wins cigar smoking i think idk but still.) and ja'marr automatically mirrors him falling over himself laughing because oh? joe fucking burrow??? doing the griddy??????

but focusing on the 'locking eyes' aspect it does bring up that they do 'lock eyes' pretty often no? like they find each other across the field to stare at each other and communicate via brain waves or some shit read each others mind through eye contact and face twitches and literally anything else other than verbal words so that's super cute to note! also its soooooooooooo important to me how they BOTH keep mentioning how they keep giving each other looks lmao like at first you'd think only ja'marr being the one to mention him giving joe looks and joe clocking it but no!! joe saying ja'marr gives him looks for him to get him the ball and when ja'marr gets asked about it he gets so?? excited?? like oh! yeah! joe mentioned the looks to you? "i do give him looks i didn't even-" cute cute ANYWAY super into how joe mentioned them locking eyes sorry got ahead of myself 😭

BUT IN ALL HONESTY in this context 'we locked eyes and i just started hitting it' (lmao insane word choice) it's more of a the minute joe looks at ja'marr he knows what he's going to do the griddy because it's ja'marr in his sights. it's not that joe 'reads ja'marr's mind that ja'marr wants him to do the griddy and he's doing it because ja'marr wants him to' it's because oh! that's my guy! my guy who has this cool fucking celly that's his trademark and i've never done it for him and i have literally no fucking idea what to do so you know i should do it now that'll make him laugh lol and boom they're laughing at each other super cutely in this game that took like 10 years off my fucking life

[aurora-313]

Heyyy,

I've tried and tried again to find the bright side of the ending and the Canon couples but I just can't. I don't even like the kids and thier designs are lacking. On top of that, I'm also dreading the day we get to see them in the anime🤦‍♀️

I've given up on the anime. It's glorified fanfiction, and honestly, nothing Kubo can do can really salvage it. Short of ripping Bleach apart from the very first arc and rebuilding it from scratch.

Franky the thing that I fail to comprehend is how Bleach went from "Monster of the week", where the monsters were fundamentally human in their hatred, desires, miseries and pains, to "let's kill/overthrow God and destroy reality".

Implausibly massive leap for a world that only consists of 3 towns and an empty void, wouldn't you say?

The dissonance is so jarring that it breaks suspension of disbelief. The cardinal sin of storytelling. That's why I don't enjoy TYBW. That's why the epilogue and the hell arcs make no impression on me.

A damning indictment of TYBW's quality as an arc is how forgettable it is. Remove it from the story entirely, and absolutely nothing would change.

There's a cult following in the west, sure, but that's all it has. Manga sales during TYBW tanked in Japan. Viewing figures in japan are in the toilet. The only thing keeping it afloat are diehard groupies who are easily distracted by shiny lights and crappy effects to hide how poorly composed it is.

The arc was utterly forgotten until the 2020 trailer dropped.

The storytelling is jank AF and the main villains are forgettable crybabies.

It's funny. By and large, I feel more emotional connection to three relative scrub Hollows from the shinigami sub arc, characters that only had a dozen chapters between them and viscerally hate them for how human their sadism is, but my eyes glaze over at the Sternritters. I barely remember any of their names.

The Quincy are boring. Yhwach is boring. There was an opportunity to salvage him by playing into the manga evidence he was a grifter who conquered, cursed, enslaved, and ate his way into power... but no. They replaced that with basic bitch daddy issues.

Then, there's artificially inflating Chad and Orihime's importance. The problem is that they're pathetically powerless humans by comparison.

Observe their first encounter with Quilge. Weak in the grand scheme of things, Quilge was casually stripping chunks of flesh off them. Compared to the feats the other Sternritters pull off, what can Chad and Orihime really do? Realistically. What CAN they do? The answer is nothing and worse than nothing.

Chad and Orihime, civilians who use reishi-based attacks, against an army whose been training for years-to-centuries, who dominate reishi as easily as breathing. No amount of training can change the fact they're a stupendously bad match-up against the Quincy. They realised their presence is pouring oil on a fire and thought the solution was to pour even MORE oil on the fire.

Tbqh. Ichigo should've put his foot down and told them to leave with Riruka and Yukio. Chad and Orihime simply cannot keep up with Ichigo anymore. Ichigo had left them completely in the dirt after Soul Society, and the rest of the series is Chad and Orihime in denial about that.

Why does Ichigo have to go through this exhaustive humiliation of a character arc, thanks to his elders leaving him to stew in ignorance, while Chad and Orihime got a free pass? And are ultimately rewarded for living in denial.

Want them to grow? Have them confront and accept Ichigo simply doesn't need them anymore. Have them accept their place isn't on his battlefield but protecting their mutual home. Have them accept they are mortals tangling with gods and demons, and they are in way over their heads.

The only plausible reason Ichigo DOES keep them around is cannon fodder.

As for the endgame ships; I don't want to talk about them, except that Ichigo should have categorically refused to have children on principle. After the shit his heritage put him through, why would Ichigo subject another child to that?

[whatifitookalilnap]

The Magic of Makeup

(Kyoshi x Rangi)

(A/N: EVERYONE PLS THERE IS A SMUT SCENE HERE! WE GET PORN WITH PLOT SO LIKE AVERT YOUR EYES IF THATS NOT YOUR THING!!!!! Also don't judge me cause IDK how diplomacy or nobility stuff works I'm here for drama. Anywho I already made a couple posts about this but I thought it was so funny that I decided to make a whole fic. The ao3 link will be posted right after this for those who prefer it. Anywho, pls enjoy!)

Kyoshi was jolted awake by Jinpa roughly shaking her entire body. The Avatar immediately sat up and grabbed her fans placed right beside her bed. 

“Who’s dying?!” Kyoshi exclaimed as she jumped out of bed.

“No one, but the Fire Nation nobility are here! Like, they are waiting in front of the gates as we speak!” Jinpa hissed.

“What do you mean they’re already here?! They were supposed to arrive at lunch!” Kyoshi yelled.

“That’s what I was told. I think this is some kind of power play. Just get dressed,” Jinpa insisted.

“Damn! Do you think I can get away with not wearing any of my usual makeup? There’s no way I’m going to have the time but I still need to look intimidating! It’s part of my whole shtick!” Kyoshi asked.

“You’re six and half feet tall, I think you can make it work. Now get changed, woman! We got people to argue with! I'll meet you there!” Jinpa said before rushing out the door.

Kyoshi cursed before springing out of bed to put on her usual business attire. Alright, the green outfit? Check. The headdress? Check. The fans? Check. Big ass gloves? Ah shit, they're not here. Whatever, it’s not that important. Well, that’s all Kyoshi has time for.

The Avatar quickly threw open the door to her bedroom and began speed walking down the hall. Kyoshi already hated leaving her room without makeup. Nowadays, putting on her makeup is step one of her morning routine. She can't remember the last time she handled Avatar business with a bare face. It made her feel vulnerable. Exposed. This meeting needs to end quickly.

As she was speed walking to the conference room where this meeting is to be held, Kyoshi spotted her girl briskly walking in halls. The Avatar couldn’t resist perking up at the sight of her girlfriend coming to meet her. Of course, Rangi had already been awake for an hour before the stupid nobles arrived. She’s always been an early riser.

“Did you have any clue they were coming in so early?” Rangi asked once they met up.

“No, Jinpa had to wake me. I had zero time to get ready,” Kyoshi sighed as the two fell into step with each other.

“I assume that’s why you’re not wearing any makeup,” Rangi very correctly guessed. 

“Yeah, there’s just no way I could have made it happen,” the tall woman confirmed.

“I think that’s for the best, honestly. Being punctual should take priority in this scenario,” Rangi nodded.

Kyoshi felt a surge of pride course through her when Rangi approved of her plans. If only the world knew how weak the Avatar is for her girlfriend. She’d be killed within a week. 

“Let’s get this over with. Hopefully the little bastards are more agreeable this time around,” Kyoshi sighed. 

How Kyoshi despises the damn Fire Nation nobles sent into the damn peace agreement. Kyoshi’s had like five other meetings with them and has been unable to come to an agreement all parties are happy with.

The names of the three nobles that have been utterly torturing Kyoshi for weeks are Akira, Nao, and Chari. Akira does most of the talking, Nao and Chari are really just her yesmen. They're all simply unbearable. The three of them were around her age of twenty two, which is probably what makes them so insufferable. They’re young, spoiled, rich, think they know everything under the damn sun, and worst of all, they don’t have the good sense to fear her. 

Anyone with half a brain should be terrified of Kyoshi! It’s like Jinpa said, she’s six feet and six inches tall! She towers over everyone she meets! Plus the makeup! Ghostly white face and bloody red eyes?? That’s the perfect recipe for fear! How can anyone not be terrified of her?

Maybe it’s wrong to feel so upset that some people aren’t scared of her, but Kyoshi can’t help it. People not having a healthy amount of fear when interacting with her makes her uneasy. If the literal Avatar can’t freak someone out, what can? 

“Wait, one more thing before we go in there,” Rangi said as she stopped right outside the door of the meeting room. 

“What? Did I forget something?” Kyoshi frowned.

“You did,” Rangi confirmed. 

Kyoshi furrowed her brows and went back through her mental checklist involving her attire. Outside of the makeup and gloves, Kyoshi is pretty positive she had everything she needed.

Naturally, Rangi proved her wrong. The firebender cupped Kyoshi’s face in her hands and gave her a light kiss on the lips. At once, Kyoshi’s arms went to Rangi’s hips in order to deepen the delightful sensation. Sadly, Rangi pulled away. 

“You’re going to do great. Stop worrying so much. That’s supposed to be my job,” Rangi smirked. 

“Kay,” Kyoshi said. You know, like an idiot. 

Rangi should never have kissed her right before such an important meeting. Now all Kyoshi can think about is the next opportunity for those lips to be back on her. Kyoshi is so in love with her it physically hurts. 

Okay, time to get the love struck look off her face before facing the nobles. Kyoshi took in a deep breath before nodding to Rangi. With that, her loyal bodyguard opened the doors to where Jinpa and the nobles sat. 

The Fire Nation nobles were muttering amongst themselves as they had during every single one of the past meetings. Typical. Kyoshi had to resist the urge to roll her eyes. However, once the three nobles looked at her, they immediately shut up. That was a surprise.

During the past meetings, even when Kyoshi made her presence known, the little trolls still blabbed on and acted as though she didn't even exist. They would only stop talking when Kyoshi started to speak. However, today she didn’t need to say a word before all eyes were on her. All of the nobles were looking at Kyoshi with shocked expressions, flushed faces, and one of them had their lips parted slightly open in what she can only assume is shock. 

This is suspicious as fuck. 

“Apologies, everyone. I hadn’t realized we would be meeting so soon. Please accept my tardiness,” Kyoshi said respectfully with a bow. 

What she really wanted to say was ‘couldn’t you have given a girl a heads up before meeting me at the crack of dawn’ but that didn’t seem appropriate.

Akira then sprung up out of her seat to pull out a chair for Kyoshi to sit. Kyoshi quickly glanced at Rangi and Jinpa in wonder to see if she's seeing the same thing. Now why on Earth would Akira do that?

“Of course, we certainly didn’t mean to inconvenience such a beautiful woman as yourself. Please, allow me,” Akira said.

Rangi looked like she wanted to set Akira on fire. Kyoshi shared the sentiment. What is she playing at? Less than a minute in and it's rather obvious they are sucking up to her. Ultimately, Kyoshi did sit down on the seat Akira pulled out for her in the name of civility. But that doesn't mean Kyoshi had to like it.

“If you don’t mind me asking, where’s Avatar Kyoshi?” Nao asked.

Kyoshi shot Rangi and Jinpa yet another look. Are these idiots being serious right now?

“I didn’t realize I was so unrecognizable without my makeup,” was all Kyoshi said. 

Granted, that is a lie, but she really didn't know what else to say that's a polite statement. Whenever Kyoshi goes into town with a bare face, many do not make the connection despite her rather noticeable height.

“What? You’re Avatar Kyoshi? Really?” Chari blurted out. 

Oh, this is going to be a long meeting.

“Yes, I am,” Kyoshi nodded.

“I didn't realize you were hiding freckles under all that makeup. You wear them well,” Nao smiled. 

Is Kyoshi drunk? Did somebody slip her something when she wasn't paying attention? What in all Four Nations is happening right now? They must want something from her if they're being this nice.

“I think we need to get started with this meeting,” Jinpa rushed out hastily. It was almost as if he was in a panic. Odd.

“Of course. Please, start us off. Your voice is quite soothing, Avatar Kyoshi,” Akira smiled, chin resting in the palm of her left hand.

Kyoshi actually thinks she’s experiencing whiplash right now. In past meetings, when the discussion gets opened up on a subject, the nobles immediately try arguing for their side. It takes ages for them to be willing to hear Kyoshi out. Something is so wrong here. It's best to ignore that compliment for now.

The more the negotiations progressed, the weirder everything got. The three nobles, mainly Akira, kept blatantly sucking up to her by praising everything she did. While it's true her reputation has improved as the Avatar the past couple years, it certainly wasn't enough to warrant this kind of reaction.

Even one of the people on her side was acting strange. Jinpa, who's usually a man of patience and serenity, seemed very antsy to move things along. He would often try to steer the conversation away from the nobles when their compliments became too excessive.

Rangi was the only one who was making sense right now. As per usual, she took her role as a bodyguard very seriously. She stood there, stoic as a statue, ready to defend Kyoshi should any dangers arise.

Kyoshi stole a quick glance at her girl to find her looking ever so slightly more irritated than usual. Who can blame her, honestly? Kyoshi wants this to be over just as much as Rangi does.

About one hour in and Kyoshi is bored out of her mind. She propped her chin on the palm of her left hand. It's really not proper etiquette and she might get scolded for it later, but Kyoshi is not at a point where she cares. She then felt an itch on her nose, so she used her right hand to scratch it.

Akira was speaking like she always did, but her voice died down when she took a good look at Kyoshi's hands. This woman literally could not get any more strange.

“Is something the matter, Lady Akira?" Kyoshi asked.

"Apologies, Avatar Kyoshi. I hope I did not offend you, I was simply caught off guard. You just have the most beautiful hands," Akira said earnestly.

Did Jinpa squeak? Huh.

Well, Kyoshi had to fight the urge to laugh. Man, they are really grasping at straws here. She must have run out of things to stroke Kyoshi's ego about. The Avatar is well aware of the state of her hands. Beauty is not on the list.

"Please, no need to fill my head with empty compliments," Kyoshi insisted.

"I assure you, my compliments are nothing but sincere. You have the most wonderful hands I've ever seen," Akira said seriously.

Huh, weird. It honestly did seem like the noblewoman was telling the truth. Maybe she is. It could very well be that she's borderline insane, but that's not really the topic here.

"I appreciate the sentiment, but my hands are pretty banged up with all the scars. Consequences of those battles, I suppose," Kyoshi awkwardly laughed in order to lighten the mood.

"The way I see it, the scars you adorn are a testament to your bravery and honor. Courageous is the most beautiful thing a person can be," Akira said. Her two noble goons nodded their agreement.

She had to admit, Kyoshi feels moved. It's no wonder Akira is the spokesman of the group. That is a noblewoman who really knows how to sweet talk a girl. She did wonder why Jinpa squeaked again, though.

Okay, Kyoshi needs to think this through. The odd behavior of the three nobles is a mystery Kyoshi has the desperate urge to crack. The compliments, the pleasantries, the agreeability, there has to be a reason why.

Seeing the three Fire Nation nobles stare at her scars with that look in their eyes made the answer hit Kyoshi like a boulder. Finally, the Avatar understood the out of character actions. Those three are absolutely terrified of her.

It all made perfect sense. Scars in general can look pretty scary. Not only does Kyoshi have a rather large amount of them, the implications of what she experienced also must be freaking out the nobles. The scars show that Kyoshi has lived through much more powerful and intimidating foes than the ones who sit before her. It's visual proof that Kyoshi is the strongest person in this room. And they're terrified of that.

It has to be why Akira made such a point to compliment them. She's well aware of the battles Kyoshi fought to gain her scars.

The makeup and gloves were hiding the scars which must be why the nobles haven't seemed scared of her until now. Turns out, Kyoshi just had her approach all wrong. They did not fear scary makeup or a tall stature, they fear scars and Kyoshi's true face.

Their behavior makes complete sense now.

It's probably wrong that Kyoshi is so excited that she finally found a way to scare these people. They have been grating on her nerves for weeks and she finally has the upper hand. The Avatar is in full control now.

Kyoshi is absolutely going to milk this.

"It feels as though we've been stuck in this room for ages. It's getting quite hot in here," Kyoshi lied.

With that, the Avatar rolled up her sleeves where even more scars decorated her arms. Kyoshi was even bold enough to undo her collar a touch to reveal the scar on her neck. She snapped open one of her fans and fluttered it to gently brush against the neck scar.

Her actions had the desired effect. All three nobles immediately began intensely studying Kyoshi's scars, especially the one on her neck. They were red, evidently nervous, and now incapable of looking her in the eye. They finally feel terrified by Kyoshi. This is a memory she will cherish for years to come.

Kyoshi saw Rangi in her peripheral vision sitting with crossed arms and a deep scowl. The Avatar felt as though she was beaming with pride. Of course Rangi caught onto the fact that Kyoshi is working on her intimidation tactic and is playing the role of scary bodyguard to add to it. Rangi is just so smart.

"Avatar Kyoshi! Would you like me to, uh, open up some windows? I had no idea you were feeling so hot," Jinpa nervously rushed out.

"Please do," Kyoshi smiled.

Jinpa nodded and hurriedly opened up a couple windows as Kyoshi put her fan back at her side. She did what she needed to do to strike fear in their hearts.

"I must say, Avatar Kyoshi, you wield your fans as though they're part of you. It's quite impressive. You have very skilled hands," Nao pointed out.

"Well, I'm sure you've heard of the other things my hands can do, haven't you?" Kyoshi asked with narrowed eyes.

If her reputation precedes her, then stories resembling her scuffle with Xu Ping An would have certainly reached the Fire Nation. She would make it very clear that compliments should not distract from how truly terrifying Kyoshi really is.

"I, well yes. Many have heard stories of your, um, abilities," Nao rushed out.

"Many stories indeed," Akira mumbled.

Chari just sat there looking like an imbecile. Kyoshi wasn't really expecting much else from the lump.

"Alright, I'm going to cut to the chase. What is it that you want from me?" Kyoshi asked in a low voice to add to her intimidation.

Obviously, for them to be this scared of her, she must also have some kind of leverage they need. Apparently, Kyoshi would have to wait to find out.

"Avatar Kyoshi, I insist upon a recess at once!" Jinpa practically shrieked while standing up.

Everyone in the room was visibly shocked at the monk's outburst except for Rangi. Kyoshi's never known the man to raise his voice in such a manner, especially not in a meeting like this one. Whatever had Jinpa so panicked must be important.

"Of course. You don't mind a small break, do you?" Kyoshi grinned, knowing damn well they won't say no to her.

"Please, take all the time you need. We'll wait as long as it takes," Akira managed to rush out.

Hah, the annoying noble still looks flustered. Kyoshi could not be happier. They finally fear her. It feels so good to win.

Kyoshi left the room, quickly followed by Rangi and Jinpa. Once the door closed behind them, Rangi grabbed Kyoshi's arm and pulled her to the left.

"Make sure we're not followed, Jinpa," was all Rangi muttered out.

"Y-yes of course," Jinpa hastily agreed.

"Rangi, what's-" Kyoshi started to say.

"One more word and I'm putting you into horse stance for so long your successor will feel it," Rangi hissed.

Okay, so clearly she's not happy. Kyoshi can't imagine why though. That meeting is going spectacularly. The nobles are significantly more cooperative, they actually listen to what Kyoshi has to say, and they're now willing to give into her demands. She can't understand what Rangi could possibly be so upset about.

Maybe Kyoshi didn't notice something during the discussions? Is it possible the Fire Nation nobles are playing her and Rangi is going to let her know? It's certainly not the first time Kyoshi has made a major blunder like that. There really wasn't much time to contemplate this because in less than a minute the two women apparently arrived at their destination.

The spot Rangi led her to was a tiny hallway that had a single window at the end of it but nothing else. There are no doors or chairs, so no one really spends much time in this area of the building. This is a very interesting spot to talk about any potential issues from the meeting.

Kyoshi looked at Rangi and raised an eyebrow, still very unwilling to speak in risk of horse stance punishment. Rangi didn't say anything. No she did not. Instead, she yanked on Kyoshi's collar and crashed their lips together. Before she even had time to blink, Rangi had pinned her against the wall of the tiny hallway.

Is that what Kyoshi was expecting to happen? It most certainly was not. Is Kyoshi mad about it? She most certainly is not.

Kyoshi quickly put one hand on Rangi's shoulder while the other cupped the back of Rangi's neck to deepen the kiss. The bodyguard moved on from kissing her lips to slowly trail her mouth down Kyoshi's neck.

"There's other ways to rile me up, you know," Rangi mumbled into her skin.

That is something that Kyoshi will be noting for later. Especially if this is the result.

The Avatar gasped as Rangi began pressing hot kisses on the scar at the base of her neck. A low moan rumbled from Kyoshi's throat against her will. Fuck, that firebender knew exactly what she was doing. Rangi knows Kyoshi's body like the back of her hand.

Therefore, she knows that kissing Kyoshi's neck scar will automatically turn her on. Kyoshi can feel herself getting wetter by the second. Her cunt began clenching around nothing, practically begging to be stimulated.

That's when she felt Rangi's hand slowly creep down to the very top of her long skirt. Then, her fingertips ever so slightly went beneath the skirt where Kyoshi's underwear resided.

Holy shit. Is Rangi trying to do what Kyoshi thinks she's trying to do? Now? Of all the times?

"Rangi, we have a meeting," Kyoshi gasped.

"Just say the word and I'll stop," Rangi whispered into her ear.

A better Avatar would be able to resist. A better Avatar would be able to tell their girlfriend it's a bad idea to have sex when they're in the middle of an important meeting.

It would appear that Kyoshi is not a better Avatar.

"We need to be quick," Kyoshi hissed.

"Well who am I to defy the Avatar?" Rangi grinned.

With that, Rangi's hands slipped past the waistband and lightly brushed against Kyoshi's clit. The taller woman gasped once more and bit her lip to prevent the sound from coming out.

"Fuck, Kyoshi. I've barely even touched you," Rangi mumbled lowly.

The poor Avatar didn't even have time to respond before one of Rangi's fingers slowly entered her. Kyoshi gasped and clenched tightly around her finger. It's when Rangi started slowly moving her finger that Kyoshi let out a high pitch whine.

Embarrassingly enough, Kyoshi's always been rather vocal during sex. This really is not the time to be vocal.

"You know I love the sounds you make, but unless you want those Fire Nations nobles to see the Avatar getting fucked by her bodyguard, you're gonna need to be quiet for me," Rangi smirked.

The prospect of that scenario playing out is enough for Kyoshi's entire body temperature to increase. It's just not fair how sexy her girlfriend is or how her melodic voice gets Kyoshi all riled up.

The Avatar had gotten so wet that Rangi had no issues slipping a second finger inside of her. Kyoshi buried her face in Rangi's shoulder to muffle her moans. The way her fingers furiously thrusted inside Kyoshi brought her closer and closer to her breaking point.

While Rangi continued to fuck Kyoshi with her fingers, the bodyguard decided to continue her onslaught of kisses on the side of Kyoshi's neck. The sensation made the Avatar so weak in the knees that she's basically leaning on Rangi for support.

Kyoshi knew she wouldn't last much longer. Rangi's fingers were relentless and every spot her lips touched set Kyoshi's skin on fire. Then Rangi's fingers hit that perfect sweet spot that made Kyoshi want to cry out from pure bliss. The firebender's precise fingers hit that same spot over and over again, causing Kyoshi to arch into Rangi, desperate to be as close as possible to her.

Once Rangi's thumb began hastily circling Kyoshi's clit, it was over for her. The Avatar had to physically bite her lip to prevent her moan from coming out as she finally reached her climax. Evidence of Kyoshi's wetness was coated over Rangi's fingers as she slowly pulled them out of her. Rangi made direct eye contact with her as she licked Kyoshi's arousal right from her own fingers. Kyoshi's face burned at the sight.

Kyoshi was too busy reeling from her orgasm to mentally process the fact that Rangi had dropped to her knees. The bodyguard began to slowly lift up Kyoshi's shirt. The Avatar's eyes widened when she realized Rangi was not, in fact, done with her yet.

"Do you think you have one more left in you?" Rangi asked.

"No Rangi, we need to get back to the negotiations where literal nobility is waiting for us!"

Is what Kyoshi WOULD have said if she wasn't such a whore.

"Rangi please," Kyoshi begged in reality.

The Fire Nation woman grinned and threw Kyoshi's right leg over Rangi's shoulder while the other leg stayed planted firmly on the ground. Rangi rolled up Kyoshi's skirt to her waist.

"Be a good girl and hold this for me," Rangi whispered.

It was like Kyoshi's body had a mind of its own with how quickly she fulfilled such a command. Kyoshi used both hands to keep her skirt up as Rangi moved the Avatar's underwear to the side. Now her bodyguard got a full view of Kyoshi's aching cunt.

"Your pussy is just as pretty as you are," Rangi praised.

Kyoshi blushed at such a sincere and lewd compliment. A split second later, Rangi's mouth made contact where Kyoshi needed it most. The Avatar couldn't help but allow a low moan to slip out.

Rangi dragged her tongue along Kyoshi's entrance. Yet again, the Avatar had to bite her lip to stop any noises of pleasure from coming out. The bodyguard decided to focus on giving Kyoshi light kisses onto her clit before starting to suck it.

Kyoshi's pants and muffled moans increased as she was being brought closer to the edge in absolutely no time. The first orgasm already made her incredibly sensitive, she would come to her peak much faster now.

Rangi's tongue began circling faster around Kyoshi's clit in a way that made her vision blur. Kyoshi began helplessly grinding her cunt against Rangi's face to get even more stimulation as fast as possible. It all felt too good. Rangi is just too good.

Once again, the bodyguard has to essentially hold up Kyoshi's entire bodyweight. The way her tongue makes Kyoshi feel is just so intense she can barely think. Thank the spirits for the wall behind her.

Rangi's skilled tongue brings Kyoshi closer and closer to her breaking point. Kyoshi's hands squeezed her skirt as she felt herself approach her release. The bodyguard's hands gripped Kyoshi's thighs as she continued eating her out. Finally, finally, Kyoshi got to experience the sweet release she had been craving. For a second time, that is.

Kyoshi really couldn't stop herself from letting a breathy moan escape her lips. Rangi pulled back with Kyoshi's wetness all over her face. The Avatar blushed as Rangi had to pull out a small handkerchief from her pocket to clean herself from the mess Kyoshi made.

With the same amount of care one would use to handle a delicate vase, Rangi gently moved Kyoshi's leg off her shoulder. Kyoshi pouted, feeling the warmth of her girl leave her, but dropped her skirt once her underwear was readjusted.

Rangi finally stood up and peppered Kyoshi's face with light, playful kisses. The Avatar giggled as her touch began to tickle.

"We really should get back to the negotiations meeting," Rangi sighed while pulling away.

"Wait, what about you?" Kyoshi asked.

Kyoshi does her best to be a good girlfriend. It's only natural she'd want to return the favor.

"Don't worry about me. Knowing you came on my face was more than enough satisfaction. For now, at least," Rangi grinned.

Kyoshi blushed brightly and looked away from her lover's gaze. It always sounds so much more dirty saying it out loud than when they actually do it.

"Rangi?" Kyoshi asked once she felt her blush die down.

Rangi hummed in response. Kyoshi smiled and gave Rangi a quick but intense kiss.

"I love you," Kyoshi smiled.

At once, it was as though every hard exterior Rangi possessed automatically softened. It was a statement they both already knew, but it was always so good to say.

"I love you, too. Let's go, Jinpa's probably having a heart attack as we speak," Rangi said.

Kyoshi nodded and followed her girl back to the meeting room. Jinpa looked at them in pure relief once he saw them again.

"Everything okay you two? What took you guys so long?" Jinpa asked.

"Oh, we're perfectly fine. Just had to tend to the Avatar's needs," Rangi shrugged.

Kyoshis misses her makeup so much. She had to hold her fan in front of her face to hide the red blush spreading all over it. This meeting needs to be over five minutes ago. How is Kyoshi supposed to survive when the love of her life does things like this?

Please, for the love of all that is good in this life and the next, let this damned meeting end quickly.

****************

The rest of the meeting went surprisingly well and without a hitch. All that was left to do was finalize the paperwork tomorrow and they would be out of Kyoshi's hair. Thank the spirits for that.

Now that the day is over, Kyoshi has the opportunity to have even more sex with her girlfriend. Life truly is good.

Once the Fire Nation nobles left the premises, Kysohi turned to her girl and gave her a smile of pure relief. The relief of finally being done with the most grueling task imaginable, talking to other people. Usually, Rangi returned her smile. Instead, the firebender simply pursed her lips and avoided Kyoshi's face.

Is she feeling okay? Rangi seemed distracted, which is very unlike her. Maybe all the recent negotiations have been getting to her?

"We need to talk," was all Rangi said before walking back into their home.

In no universe is the phrase 'we need to talk' a good thing to hear from the woman you're dating. Kyoshi felt like she was walking to the gallows as she followed Rangi back to their shared bedroom. Once they reached said room, Kyoshi sat on the edge of the bed. Rangi did not sit beside her. Instead, she chose to stand right in front of her.

Well now Kyoshi is slightly terrified for their relationship. She simply waited for the bodyguard to speak.

"Look, next time you use such a tactic to get your way in negotiations, at least warn me first. I realize sometimes a more, unconventional approach is necessary, but I was completely blind sided," Rangi frowned

"What are you talking about? That was the most conventional strategy," Kyoshi replied, very confused.

Intimidation tactics in general are very common to use. In fact, Kyoshi would say it's her favorite tactic of all time. How she loves striking fear into people's hearts.

Yikes, it sounded really bad when she put it that way.

"You're kidding me, right? There's absolutely nothing conventional about what happened back there!" Rangi snapped, voice laced with hurt.

Kyoshi has no idea why Rangi is so upset. Could it be Kyoshi had done something to offend her?

"Look, I honestly don't understand why you're so upset. I did what I always do. I scare the life out of them, they give us what we want. Simple math," Kyoshi insisted.

Rangi did not look amused at all.

"Scared them? You're claiming to have scared them? You have to be joking," Rangi scoffed.

"Uh, no. No I'm not," Kyoshi honestly told her.

Rangi stared at her for a moment before her entire expression changed.

"Holy shit, you're not joking," Rangi mumbled.

"Why would I?" Kyoshi asked with a raised eyebrow.

Rangi merely continued to stare at her for a moment. Then, she buried her face in her hands. She let out a strangled, almost choking sound and Kyoshi feared her girl was crying. Then she looked up and found Rangi laughing.

The fuck is so funny?

"I could not be more lost right now," Kyoshi bluntly stated.

Rangi, still laughing her ass off, walked over and sat next to Kyoshi on the bed. Once she was finished with her little giggles, Rangi let out a long, drawn out sigh.

"Spirits, I fell in love with a moron," Rangi said.

"I mean, you're probably not wrong, but why?" Kyoshi exclaimed.

She is just so confused. For once, Kyoshi thought she knew what she was doing!

"I swear, you're denser than the rocks you bend. Kyoshi, those nobles weren't scared of you, they were flirting with you," Rangi told her.

Kyoshi blinked twice. Then immediately rolled her eyes. That's what she thought was going on? Seriously?

"C'mon Rangi, there's no way. I think I would know if I was getting hit on," Kyoshi drawled.

"I had a crush on you for two years before you confessed," Rangi very rudely reminded her.

"That's true, but be realistic Rangi. I'm well aware of what I look like," Kyoshi scoffed.

"Believe me, so am I. What exactly are you trying to say?" Rangi glared.

Boy, her girl is not going to like this one. Along with being the Avatar's bodyguard, it was Rangi's life mission to build Kyoshi's confidence. The Avatar never really excelled in that department.

"No need for the looks, Rangi. It's not like I think I'm some hideous troll or anything. But, well, I'm crazy tall and have a lot of scars. It's not exactly an ideal look. Neither are the freckles, I've come to learn. Besides, it's like you said. I had nice hands before they got all scarred, but now," Kyoshi sighed while trailing off.

Rangi frowned before holding both of Kyoshi's hands in her own. She soothingly rubbed her thumbs against the back of Kyoshi's hands.

"I'm sorry I made you feel as though a part of you was undesirable. That's really not what I was trying to say. I've always found your hands pretty, I just conveyed my feelings poorly. I admit, I have very complicated feelings about your scars," Rangi sighed.

She thinks that deep down, Kyoshi knew that already. Unfortunately, her self esteem has never really been sky high. Hearing Rangi say those words out loud was a bigger comfort than Kyoshi thought it would be.

"Oh? Like what?" Kyoshi asked curiously.

"On one hand, I hate that you had to experience so much pain. They're reminders that I wasn't able to protect you. You never deserved such horrible treatment. But on the other hand," Rangi said. "Spirits, Kyoshi, your scars are so attractive. The way they decorate your skin makes you look like a damn masterpiece. It's like lightning running across your body. I've never seen anyone so beautiful."

Rangi was staring at Kyoshi with so much love that it actually stole the air from her lungs. Immediately, the Avatar's cheeks were burning so badly they had to resemble the deep red of a fire lily.

"So you think I'm attractive," Kyoshi mumbled with a dopey grin.

Rangi gave her a look and lightly kicked her leg. Kyoshi let out a small giggle at her girlfriend's action.

"Of course I think you're attractive, you big oaf. We are in a romantic relationship," Rangi snorted.

Kyoshi giggled and pressed a small kiss atop Rangi's forehread. Her girl blushed a bit before leaning her head on Kyoshi's shoulder.

"You know, in the Fire Nation, scars really are considered to be a very beautiful addition to the human body. I hate to agree with that stupid Akiko or whatever, but your scars are so pretty. They're like little trophies of battles you survived. Let me tell you, they'd have gone ballistic if they knew about your stretch marks. They're a sign of growth and health back. Just another part of you so attractive it drives me insane," Rangi told her.

Kyoshi blushed once more at the mention of said marks. Her stretch marks mainly littered around her breasts and thighs. Now that Kyoshi thinks about it, Rangi's always given them special attention.

"Also, fuck Yokoya beauty standards. I adore your freckles. The jackass nobles certainly did too," Rangi huffed.

Kyoshi giggled and kissed her girl's nose. Then, realization dawned on her.

"Oh spirits, does that mean me showing off my scars," Kyoshi trailed off.

"Yeah, you were basically seducing them. It was very effective," Rangi confirmed.

"That's so humiliating! Now everything I threatened just sounds sexual!" Kyoshi groaned while flopping on the bed.

Rangi laughed and laid down next to her. Kyoshi adjusted herself so that they were eye level. Spirits, Rangi has the prettiest eyes.

"That may or may not be why I dragged you out of the meeting. I get that people flirt with you, I do. But it just seemed like you were flirting back this time," Rangi admitted quietly.

Kyoshi frowned at the realization that it definitely seemed like she was flirting. She cringed remembering the comment about what her hands had done. That really sounds sexual and Kyoshi absolutely hates it.

"I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to," Kyoshi honestly told her.

"Now I know you didn't. I'm not upset since you were unaware. I guess I just got too jealous. I wasn't too much during that meeting, was I? I hope I didn't pressure you into anything," Rangi worriedly stated.

It shouldn't be possible to be this in love with someone, yet here Kyoshi is. The amount of love she has for Rangi is far too much to be contained in this world.

"Of course I wanted everything you gave me. I'll sleep good tonight knowing that my stoic, calm, and collected bodyguard fucked me in the middle of a negotiations meeting because she was jealous," Kyoshi teased.

Rangi groaned and playfully shoved Kyoshi's shoulder. The Avatar merely laughed and scooted closer to her.

"You're not the only one who gets jealous, you know. I swear countless people have tried hitting on you. I never feel too upset about it because you shut them down so quickly it baffles them," Kyoshi smiled.

Rangi merely kissed Kyoshi on the lips in response. Kyoshi was more than happy to feel her love's lips on her once more.

"I still can't believe you didn't notice, they were being so obvious about it. I really shouldn't be surprised. Not like this is the first time you were flirted with and were completely oblivious," Rangi sighed.

"What? What other times are there?" Kyoshi frowned.

"My point exactly. Nothing to worry your pretty little head about," Rangi teased as she kissed her cheek.

Kyoshi just smiled and observed Rangi's face for a moment. Truly, has there ever been a more beautiful woman? Kyoshi doubts it.

The Avatar was going to change the subject and suggest the two get a quick nap in, but stopped herself. There's just one detail that still doesn't make sense about today.

"Oh, quick question. Do you know what was up with Jinpa during the meeting? I've never seen him so antsy," Kyoshi asked.

Rangi's face turned bright red and she avoided Kyoshi's gaze. It took her a couple moments, but Rangi finally gave her an answer.

"That was unfortunately my fault. I'm not as calm and collected as I look. Seeing someone flirt with my girlfriend kind of makes me seethe with rage. When they started hitting on you, I thought I was gripping the chair but I was really digging into Jinpa's arm. He told me it was fine so pretty much every time you were hit on, I squeezed his arm. I'm pretty sure I ended up burning it at some point. So, uh, please remind me to apologize to him tomorrow," Rangi sheepishly told her.

Wow.

"Between the two of us, that poor bastard needs the biggest raise in all Four Nations."

"Agreed."

[niiwa-angel]

I love the potential world building aspect for the humans living in any transformers media, because it's a fucking hilarious concept.

I like to think the Cybertronians are the governments of the world's worst kept secrets. Like, in his first scene in the Bayverse Transformers Movie, Bumblebee drove onto the lot literally as Sam was already there, slammed his door into the car next to him, and then blew out the windows of every other car on the lot because he needed to go with Sam but his dad didn't wanna fork over an extra $1000. Then in that SAME MOVIE, he kicks Sam and Mikayla out of his cab in the middle of the street, because Mikayla called him "a piece of shit Camero" only to return less than two minutes later, stunt driving, as a newer model of a Camero.

Not to mention, the Decepticons don't exactly try to hide. Not for long anyway. And I chuckle to think what they were doing off screen before the movie even started. In fact, in pretty much any transformers media I've seen (admittedly it's been a while for the cartoons but still) the Decepticons just fucked around. They did not have a fuck to give about whether or not they were seen by humans.

So I imagine, if you're anybody with Internet access anywhere in the world, you probably know that there are giant alien robots just lurking around. Car does something weird on the roadway in front of you? Get out your phone, there's not an non-zero chance it'll transform and you can go internet famous. Go to an air show? Keep an eye out for any particularly flashy planes, it may be Starscream.

I also think the Autobots would try and copy humans to some extent. Jazz watches a human rip open a package with their teeth and he starts mimicking it. When in Rome, do as the Romans after all. Or Ironhide sees humans step on pop/beer cans when finished drinking them and starts doing that with empty oil barrels. It's funny but it also makes every human around them VERY conscious of the fact that these guys could easily kill them if they wanted to.

BUT! Humans will pack bond with literally anything. So for the humans who live near the Autobots, I'd like to think they're just part of the community. Your elderly parent/grandparent needs a ride to a medical appointment but you work full time and don't want to pay for a cab? Call one of the Autobots. Your family member will get there and back safely but they do not get to pick the music. The streets and sidewalks are always clear of snow because the Autobots took over road clearing since they fucking hate winter. People leave jugs of oil, WD40, and scrap metal in their front lawns because the Autobots eat and drink those things. The drive in theaters was going to go out of business, since most people don't use them anymore, but the big robots like it so the community just agrees to keep it open for them.

If one of them hands you a grocery list and some money, just go get their stuff for them. They don't fit in human stores but they do sometimes need stuff. Be a good neighbour to your local alien robot.

And can you IMAGINE the pranks the younger generations can get up to with more of the care free bots? Senior prank day just got a lot more intense. Jazz lifted a principals care up onto the school roof once because the seniors bribed him with old car parts to eat. Rachet walls outside one morning to find that someone has painted a local statue yellow and black (no idea who that could have been) and Optimus is constantly getting calls because Mirage is impersonating a police car to scare people into slowing down.

But if every human living near the Autobots, I think the kids would love them the most. And the adults know that and exploit it as much as possible. Reading challenge at the nearby elementary school? Optimus was a librarian, everyone go outside and he's going to give us a lecture on the importance of reading. Rachet is also there to stress the importance of good posture while we're at it.