#the fic is the best 18 year old me-21 year old me could do and to that I salute her honestly

[lordsardine]

.

[kamaluhkhan]

THE GRUDGE (or: the 7 things luke castellan hated about you)

read part two GET HIM BACK! (or: the 7 reasons you want revenge on luke castellan)

pairing: luke castellan x child of nemesis!reader (gender not specified)

word count: 8.5k

summary: luke hated your guts. he really did. he just hoped that no one could tell how, even after all this, you're still everything to him.

warnings/disclaimer: luke's POV. spoilers for the lightning thief and season 1 of pjo. some heated make-out sessions but no actual smut - MDNI / 18+. mentions of blood + death + alcohol. luke is 19 during tlt but i wrote this with him + reader being 21 by the end of this (this is important for the next part lol). anyways, luke + reader share clothes and lots of intense emotions they maybe possibly don't process in the best way. lots of ANGST - it's a greek tragedy fr!

author's note: welcome to my new hyperfixation! this fic is LONG but i hope she's worth it ♡

♪: the grudge by olivia rodrigo

(i. you have a sharp tongue)

fourteen year old luke was overwhelmed when he first stepped into the hermes cabin. it was loud and overcrowded and no one really seemed to care that they had a new cabinmate. the head counselor showed luke to an empty bed at the back, told him to get settled in, and left without another word. luke dropped his backpack before collapsing on the mattress. it was so thin that he could feel the springs dig into his back.

"you'll get used to it."

luke sat up to see you climbing through the window. 

you had a band-aid stuck on your chin, chipped nail polish the color of blackberries, and leather combat boots that looked way too heavy to be wearing in the heat of summer. 

“the shitty mattress?”

“i meant the whole chaos of cabin 11, and the way things work around here in general. if you can get used to the shitty mattress, all power to you.” 

your tone was friendly enough, playful even. you smiled at him so comfortably it made luke nauseous. 

“good to know.” he tried to smile back at you, but his heart wasn’t in it. “i’m luke, by the way.”

“yeah, i know. i’m —”

“y/n!”

you seemed entirely unfazed as the blond who called your name stormed over to you. you rolled your eyes, something only luke could notice, before turning to her.

“someone stole my candy.”

“i’m very sorry to hear that, maddy. gotta be careful around here.” your voice dripped like poisoned honey, deceptively innocent and sweet.

maddy was not having it. she huffed at you. “it was you, wasn’t it?”

“that depends. did you cheat at poker last night? again?” 

some of the chatter throughout the cabin paused, heads turning to listen in. 

“what? n-no!” 

“then you have your answer, maddy.” you exaggerated a sigh, as though you had already won the fight and were annoyed that she came back for more. “now, if you’ll excuse me, i have a new camper to show around.”

chiron had already given them a tour, but luke didn’t protest when you grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the window with you. your hand was warm in his as you dragged him along to the corner of the cabin where a poorly made ladder waited for you. 

“come on.” you started climbing, and only stopped to look down when you realized luke wasn’t following you. “best view of camp. trust me.”

a shiver passed through luke. trust didn’t come easy to him. he also didn’t particularly want to return to a stuffy cabin where all he would do was count reasons he did not want to be there.

 so, luke followed you. he sat down next to you on the roof and looked out at the sun shining on his new home, but he couldn't help but be slightly bitter. the gods had gotten all of you into this life of endless danger and battles and monsters, and this was all they had to offer in return: a summer camp. 

it just didn't seem fair. 

there was something else he noticed then. what was it that chiron had said? camp half-blood was supposed to be a safe haven for all demigods. 

“i don’t get it. there are only twelve cabins, but aren’t there, like, a million other gods?”

you straightened your posture then, and turned to luke with a newfound interest. 

“camp half-blood only has cabins representing the twelve olympians. apparently, they’re the only ones important enough to have children worth recognizing, and they can’t even do that half the time,” you explained, impertinence laced throughout your words. it seemed like something you could never quite get off your chest. 

every  demigod knew that the gods didn’t appreciate sarcasm. they  didn’t particularly like being called out on their bullshit, either.

you didn’t seem to care; you even rolled your eyes up at the sky, as if challenging zeus himself. 

“anyways, that’s why the hermes cabin is so crowded. it takes in campers who are unclaimed or whose parent doesn’t have a cabin at camp. like me.”

“so, who’s your godly parent?”

you fiddled with the leather cord on your neck. it held a few clay beads like the other campers, but there was one silver charm he noticed only you wore — scales, by the looks of it. you clutched onto it.

luke realized that, despite your own advice, maybe you resented having to get used to the way things worked around here, and having to hide your resentment. maybe that was worse than having to sleep on an uncomfortable bed for the rest of your life.

"nemesis. goddess of revenge."

"that's....hardcore."

you scoffed and moved on to twisting the silver ring on your index finger. "a lot of people take it that way, and i think it scares them a bit.”

“so that’s why you’re extra nice to new campers, huh?” 

“no, i was just in a good mood today.” you smirked.

“guess i was just lucky, then.”

luke couldn’t help but smile at your laugh — sharp, biting. you nudged your boot against his sneaker, which shifted you closer to him, shoulders practically touching. 

“what people don’t understand is that it's more about balance, you know? you do good things, and good things happen to you. at least, they should. you do bad things and….” you pulled out an outrageously big bag of candy, dropped it between you and luke, and winked at him. “you face the consequences.” 

“that makes sense.” luke leaned over to grab a handful of gummy bears. “like karma.”

“yeah. exactly.” 

you bit the head off a red bear, both of you chewing in silence before you added:

“by the way, i’m sorry about your friend.” you swallowed and caught luke’s gaze. 

chiron warned him that word would travel fast around camp about what happened to thalia, and luke had prepared himself for anything — anything but your reaction. there was no pity in your eyes; instead, there was a hint of rage, as though thalia had been your friend, too. 

“she deserved more.” 

luke’s eyes caught the glint of a knife strapped to your belt. he took another handful of the candy you stole, and he thought about the fire and fearlessness behind your words, and, despite everything, it felt right to be with you then and there. 

“yeah,” he finally whispered back. “she did.”

we all do. 

neither of you said those words, but the suggestion was there, and it felt like a promise. 

(ii. you hold on to every stupid, little detail)

“slow down, tiger.” 

your voice echoed throughout the arena, and if luke had been fighting a real opponent, it might have gotten him killed. instead, he just stopped mid-swing, sparing another straw dummy from losing its arm. 

“left hand,” you noted as you walked past him towards a bench. “you, my friend, are in need of a break.”

luke loosened the grip on his sword. the only time luke fought with his non-dominant hand was when he had overworked the other. he must have switched an hour ago, but judging by how heavy his arm felt, it could have very well been two.  

his curls were stuck to his forehead with sweat, his shirt soaked through. he could feel a dull pain behind his eyes, and luke was worried that if he stopped to catch his breath, he would pass out. or, even worse, have to face the reality of the shitty news he’d gotten early that day. 

“come sit with me,” you urged. “you’re exhausted, tiger.” 

luke bristled at your nickname for him. 

sure, luke loved that there was something only you called him, a secret kept between you in plain sight, but it was also a reminder that it was harder to hide behind the hero act when you were around.

everyone else at camp figured the nickname was a playful attempt at calling him strong and charismatic. the truth was that luke once told you that his favorite cereal as a kid was frosted flakes and that he would dream of playing sports as well as tony the tiger. for better or for worse, like most things, you wouldn’t let it go. 

case in point: if it was anybody other than you trying to get him to take a break, luke could have just brushed them off with a charming smile and continued swordfighting until his arms fell off, but in the two years since meeting you, luke had never met anyone as stubborn and convincing. like him, it seemed you were willing to fight and shed blood to get your way. luke was never really in the mood to make you bleed, even when feeling like he could burn the entire world down, so he usually gave in to your demands.  

as soon as he sat down next to you, you handed him an orange flavored energy drink — his favorite. anything other than water was hard to come by at camp without the enchanted goblets in the dining pavilion, or the right connection in the hermes cabin. he ran out of his stash the other day, but you must have noticed and gotten one of the stoll brothers to smuggle more in. 

“thanks,” luke said, ignoring the jolt of electricity that passed through him when your fingers brushed together briefly. 

 the two of you looked out at the sword arena, and all the straw dummies that luke had destroyed. you wait for him to take three big gulps of his drink before speaking again. 

“i guess chiron and your dad decided you weren’t ready for a quest.”

luke exhaled sharply. “how did you —”

“the only time you’d skip out on capture the flag is if something really shitty happened.” you looked down at luke’s clenched fists, and that seemed to be all the confirmation you needed. “you promised annabeth you'd be there, and it's not like you to let her down."

fuck. he had completely forgotten that tonight was annabeth's first time as team captain. this entire week, she had been prepping a winning strategy. it wasn’t like annabeth needed him to win, but luke was her big brother, and he should have been there. you were right — he had let her down. 

the realization made luke’s day go from bad to worse. 

"i told her you were helping a new camper with an emergency. she didn't believe it, but she adjusted her strategy and we still won.”

“well, thank the gods everything worked in the end,” luke grumbled. 

“don’t thank the gods,” you quipped. “thank annabeth chase for her brilliant mind, and me for covering for your sorry ass.”

when luke didn’t indulge in your usual playful banter, you moved closer to him and brushed some curls away from his eyes. your skin warmed his forehead, and the small gesture made him feel better than he had all day.

“look, i’m not going to give you some bullshit inspirational speech about how the gods don’t get to define what a hero is, or how you don’t need a quest to prove that you’re worthy of being one. we’ve each been through that before, and i have a feeling this won’t be our last time, either.”

“then why are you here?” the question came out harsher than luke had intended it to.

“because she’s trying her best to hide it, but annabeth is really hurt that you didn’t show up for the game. i figured the least you could do is suck it up, come to the campfire, and make her those signature luke castellan s’mores. you could probably use one, too, since you haven’t eaten anything since breakfast.” 

you were right, again. luke was exhausted, he was furious, but most of all, he was starving.  

later that night, luke sat next to annabeth and vowed to make her as many s’mores as she wanted. you’d gone to sit with the hephaestus kids, trying to convince beckendorf and nyssa to join your cabin’s post-campfire party at the beach, even though they had to work in the forges early the next morning. 

when chiron made his weekly speech, congratulating the winners of capture the flag and thanking the gods for keeping everyone safe, you and luke caught each other’s gaze from across the fire. you rolled your eyes and luke bit back a smile as you turned back to beckendorf. he noticed your knees were practically touching. did you sit that close to everyone? 

luke was looking at you for so long that the marshmallow he was roasting fell into the fire, despite annabeth’s warnings. she handed him another one. 

"you should tell her how you feel," annabeth said. "stop being a coward." 

whether it was the smell of burnt sugar, the heat of the fire, or annabeth’s comment, luke started to feel dizzy. he did his best to shake it off, asking annabeth for a play-by-play of her strategy earlier that night, but he couldn’t quite get rid of the thought of you. 

(iii. you don't care if your clothes are stained with blood)

“i just….i can’t fucking believe you, luke.”

“i don’t get why you’re so upset — you’ve never cared about quests before.”

luke was hoping to break the news to you after capture the flag. unfortunately for him, word travels fast around camp. 

annabeth had the two of you scouting the east side for the flag, while she and some other athena kids took the west. you hadn’t found anything so far, which meant that you’d spent the better part of an hour bickering over luke’s choice of companions for his quest. a choice that included charles beckendorf and chris rodriguez, and purposefully did not include you, much to your fury.  

before you could continue arguing, luke heard the sound of footsteps approaching. he looked over to you, and you already had your shield and sword at the ready. 

a few red defenders emerged from the trees. one charged at luke, but you stepped in so he could deal with the other two. one of his opponents went down fairly easily, but the other put up much more of a fight. metal clashed behind him as you kept fighting as well. you might not have been as skilled a swordfighter as luke, but he knew that you could hold your own, at least until he was finished with the person in front of him. 

luke parried his opponent’s strike, causing them to take a step closer. he was preparing to disarm them, just as he heard you yelp and stumble to the ground. it only took a millisecond of his attention, but it gave his opponent the opportunity to elbow him in the face. luke felt a crack upon impact, and pain radiated from his nose; he powered through. 

he had to finish this fight, and he had to do it fast. you needed him. 

his ears were ringing as he finally knocked over his opponent, kicking away their sword and keeping his foot on their chest. luke turned around to see you having turned the tides, the blade of your sword dangerously close to your opponent’s neck.

you locked eyes with luke, and you both understood — it was time to go. the two of you ran through the forest, as far away as you could before having to stop and catch your breath.

luke removed his helmet to get some air, and dropped his weapons. you did the same. you looked at him, brows furrowed.

“your nose.”

luke licked his lips, tasting blood. the triumph of winning that last fight overshadowed the ache of his potentially broken nose. in fact, he liked the image of a ruthless warrior emerging from the glory and gore of battle, that even though he did not bleed ichor like a god, he still had power. 

you, on the other hand, didn’t look impressed. instead, you stepped forward and offered the sleeve of your shirt to wipe away the blood. 

“you don’t have to —”

“i know you think you’re a badass walking around all broken and bloody, but you shouldn’t deny your admirers your pretty face,” you teased. 

it was no secret that luke had numerous admirers around camp, a fact you loved to tease him about. he was sure that you relished in how flustered that made him. all you had to call him was pretty boy, and luke could be reduced to a blushing mess. 

it was pathetic how much power you had over him.

“besides, i wouldn’t have gotten out of that last fight if you hadn’t taught me that disarming technique earlier. i owe you. it’s what we do. we take care of each other, right?”

he couldn’t argue with that.

a few moments of silence passed as you cleaned his face. something shifted as you worked, the flirtatious grin fading away. when you pulled away, your sleeve was stained a dark crimson. 

“just tell me honestly,” you finally murmured. “why don't you want me to join your quest?” 

luke was genuinely taken aback by the softness of your voice, now devoid of its usual fire. you wouldn’t meet luke’s eyes, but being that close to you, he noticed they were slightly glazed over.

he had expected you to be angry at his decision. he expected you to yell and argue and try to change his mind. luke hadn’t expected you to be so hurt. so broken. 

he hadn’t planned on it, but luke decided to tell you the truth then.

“look, karma, if you come with me, my heart wouldn’t fully be in the quest. i’d be so caught up in….well, you.”

a pause.

“is that a bad thing?”

“not usually, no.” 

you smirked a little at that, and luke’s heart skipped a beat. it also made his decision even clearer. 

“but i need to be focused for this. i need….” he let out a deep sigh. “i need to prove myself. this is my first real chance, and i can’t fuck it up.”

you met his gaze and smiled brightly at him, your signature spark of confidence returning.  

“you won’t.”

you reached a hand up to play with his necklace. luke hadn’t noticed how close you’d gotten until your fingers started tracing over those four clay beads. it made his entire body burst into flames.

“i’ve been wanting to do something for a while. and, aphrodite save me, it might be really stupid, but —”

luke took a lucky guess as to where you were going, and crashed his lips against yours. aphrodite knows that he'd been wanting to do that for a while, too. 

he often got drunk on the adrenaline of battle, the glory of winning, but nothing was quite like the rush of kissing you for the first time. 

it was messy and urgent, both of you aware that, at any moment, you could be interrupted. your noses were bumping together, teeth clacking against each other. the metallic tang of blood lingered on luke’s tongue, but neither of you seemed to care. you even bit his lip slightly, as if you wanted more. armor sat heavy and cold between your chests, preventing you from getting closer. luke had never loathed the protective gear more. 

he made up for it by lodging one hand underneath your jaw, and snaking the other beneath the celestial bronze, beneath the cotton of your shirt, admiring how your pulse quickened under his thumb when he grazed the soft skin of your stomach. you tangled your hands into his hair, nails scraping against his scalp. he groaned and felt you smirk against his lips. 

luke had kissed a few people before, sure, but never like this: like a knife to the gut, and if you pulled away, luke would surely bleed out and die. 

it wouldn’t be a hero’s death, in the traditional sense, but at least he’d die happy. 

how many heroes could claim that?

when luke ran out of air, feeling like his lungs were burning, he had to pull away. 

you glanced down at luke’s kiss-bitten lips, then back to his eyes. luke flushed under the intensity of your gaze. 

“just promise me something, tiger,” you whispered, voice hoarse. 

“anything.”

“come back alive.”

luke leaned forward and placed another kiss on your lips, this one much gentler than before.

“i promise.”

(iv. you love like a scar that won't fade)

the nightmares were getting worse. 

luke woke up in a cold sweat, taking gulps of air in an attempt to steady his breathing.

“luke.” 

your whisper did little to quell the pit of dread growing in his stomach, but it did enough to bring him back down to reality. 

he was at camp half-blood (fuck the gods of olympus), in the hermes cabin (fuck you, dad), in a bed next to yours (fuck, if he could tell you what — who — was going through his head, he would).

“i’m…i’m fine,” he murmured back, voice catching slightly on the lie. 

like clockwork, you shifted from your bed to his, slipping under the covers. it didn’t matter that it was a hot summer night, and the minute your legs touched his, he could feel himself starting to overheat. 

your thumb brushed over the thick edge of his scar, up his cheekbone to the corner of his eye. it had been a year, living with this reminder. a reminder that he had failed, just as much as his father and the olympians had failed him. 

luke tried to pretend that he didn’t come back from his quest as a shell of who he once was. after all, it was meant to be his shining moment as a demigod, meant to gain him all the glory and father’s praise he once wished for. 

what a fucking joke.

every morning, luke would crawl into a different skin. he welcomed new campers and taught sword-fighting. he laughed with chris and his other siblings and strategized with annabeth for capture the flag. he would be the easy-going, charming, skillful senior counselor who respected the gods and honored them in everything he did. 

again: a fucking joke.

nights were different, though, with you so close to him, you who could always see right through him.

every night, luke was a fourteen-year old boy again, with so much rage and resentment he didn't know what to do with it. 

of course, you were always you - a bleeding heart underneath layers of armor. you didn't care about fate, or the gods, or the titans. you cared about justice, you cared about what was right and fair. 

most of all, you cared about luke.

“you were screaming,” you told him, voice barely cutting through the soft snores and sleeptalkings of your other cabinmates. 

“sorry,” he managed. looking at you in the dull moonlight, luke noticed the deep shadows under your eyes. 

“it’s fine. you just….you scared me, tiger.” 

your hand still rested on his cheek, and for a second, luke hoped you would kiss him, but you didn’t. instead, you told him to try and get some sleep, and sank further into his bed before closing your eyes. 

for the hundredth night in a row, luke hoped you couldn’t hear his heart hammering in his chest as you fell asleep next to him.

since coming back from his quest, luke didn’t have it in him to suggest being anything other than friends, and you didn’t push it. there had been a few....moments between you, sure, but nothing more.

luke thought you might have changed your mind, because who would want to be with a bitter, worthless, wannabe hero? then again, that voice haunting his dreams…. luke could change that. 

but, at what cost?

(v. you protect people as ruthlessly as a starving dog)

luke could hear you talking to percy jackson outside. though he couldn’t quite determine what was being said, as much as he tried.

you entered the bathroom and instantly caught luke’s eyes in the mirror. you were wearing your faded pyjama shorts with cartoon crows, and a flannel shirt that luke had a sneaking suspicion might have been his. you smiled at him before setting up at the counter, one sink between you. 

“what was that about?” luke asked after spitting out a mouthful of minty toothpaste.

“oh, nothing.” you were searching through your toiletry bag for something, and seemed to come up short. “hey, do you have any extra dental floss?”

luke threw some over to you. as you effortlessly caught it, he noticed your knuckles, bruised and bloodied.

“what happened?” 

you finished flossing and briefly examined your hands before pulling out your toothbrush. 

“it’s not a big deal,” you assured. “some ares kids were picking on percy, and then they started pushing him around, like, really pushing him around, so….” 

“....you decided to send them to the infirmary.”

you squeezed some toothpaste on your brush before continuing. “i don’t need you to lecture me about how i shouldn’t be fighting with other campers because i’ve been here longer and i should be a good role model. you know what a good role model does? not let kids beat up other kids and think the worst punishment they’ll get is no dessert for a week.”

luke watched carefully as you jammed the toothbrush in your mouth and brushed with such force, he was worried your teeth might dislodge. he knew that you would shed blood for someone you loved, and that you didn’t particularly care if you had to break rules in doing so, because you believed that what was written was not necessarily what was right. 

in fact, luke loved that about you.

no, it wasn’t the fighting that luke cared about — it was who you were fighting for. 

percy was a good kid, he really was. luke just didn’t want you getting attached. 

“i wasn’t going to lecture you. i’m guessing chiron already did?” 

you nodded and spat out what looked like a combination of toothpaste and blood. you rinsed your mouth until the water lost its pinkish hue. once you were done, luke continued his train of thought.

“i just didn’t realize you cared so much about him.”

“about percy?” 

luke could tell that he didn’t have your full attention. you were packing your stuff back up, accidentally tossing luke’s dental floss into your bag, but he had more pressing matters to deal with.

“yeah. the kid’s only been at camp for three days, and you’re already acting like his guard dog.”

you finally turned to luke and glared at him. 

“maybe. but percy’s sweet and he doesn’t seem like the type to put up with bullshit. he’s been through a lot, and annabeth seems to like him, too. as far as i’m concerned, percy’s one of us, and i’m not going to let anyone push him around.”

luke raised an eyebrow at you. “he’s sweet?”

“yeah. like, just now, he gave me some blue raspberry jelly beans as a thank you. said his mom used to work at a candy store. he also wanted me to apologize to you for him. he feels bad about beating you in sword-fighting earlier.” 

you scoffed, like you resented luke for having to apologize to him on percy’s behalf. you definitely did not appreciate that guard dog comment. luke clenched his jaw, seething over what you had just said. 

satisfied with his reaction, you gave luke that nauseating smile of yours, tilted your head towards the exit. a truce, because you never liked to fight with luke for too long, and a order, because you knew luke would always follow. 

the two of you began walking back to your cabin in the warm mid-june air. 

“i wouldn’t say he beat me,” luke huffed. “it was beginner’s luck.”

“sure, tiger. it was beginner’s luck that disarmed the best swordsman we’ve had in the last 300 years.”

you nudged luke’s shoulder with yours, but he recoiled from your touch. 

“are you trying to make me feel worse?” luke tried his best to avoid snapping at you, keeping his tone measured.

“i’m just saying that maybe the kid has natural talent and that doesn’t make you any less talented. there’s no need to get jealous.”

luke resisted the urge to growl at your suggestion. 

to be clear, he was not jealous. it’s just that luke had spent years of blood, sweat, and tears getting to where he was then, and percy jackson had just gotten to camp. 

and, to be even more clear, luke was not jealous of how you were already defending percy with your whole body and your whole heart, the way you did for him. 

by then, you reached the front of the hermes cabin. luke could already hear the commotion of what he would need to deal with as soon as he walked in. the burden of being head counselor, one he approached with an elastic smile that could snap at any moment. 

you tugged on luke’s sleeve before he could open the door. 

“hey. are we okay?”

luke looked down at your fingers grasping the fabric of a sweatshirt he was just realizing was yours. your nails were painted a dark red, now chipped after a week of wear. you had begged luke to paint his nails then, and once again, he gave in. he even started to like the purple you had chosen just for him, so deep it was almost black. the same color you were wearing the first time you and luke met.

he smiled at the memory — a real smile, no plastic — and then smiled back up at you.

“we’re fine, karma.” and he moved to enter the cabin. luke could hear the threat of an argument bubbling up, what sounded like a petty one over a prank gone wrong.

“wait.” you tugged at his (your) sweatshirt once more. “there’s something i wanted to talk to you about, about tomorrow night—”

“annabeth called a meeting during free time.”

“yeah, i know, it’s just —”

“she’ll run through strategy for capture the flag then.”

“one of the aphrodite senior campers asked me to the campfire,” you blurted it out, and luke decided to ignore the sound of a fight breaking out from behind the wooden door.

what in the name of hades were you talking about?

“they asked you out? like…like a….” luke didn’t even want to speak the word, scared it would make it real.

“a date,” you said casually, as if that one word didn’t rip luke’s heart in a million pieces. “i said yes.” an admission that took all those pieces and set them on fire. 

sure, in the seven years since you and luke met, you’d each talked about boys, about girls, about dating and kissing them and going further. but there was something about this one that felt different. something about the way you told him.

“but, listen, i wanted to let you know it’s not —”

“good for you,” was all luke said through gritted teeth before someone started calling his name again, louder and more urgently, and he had to duck inside.  

(vi. you taste like burning cherries and righteous anger)

your team had won capture the flag, of course. the biggest news of the evening, though: percy jackson was the son of the sea god. 

he was a forbidden child, the hero of the great prophecy. 

everything was falling into place. 

all luke should be thinking about is kronos’ plan, and his role in it, and how a world without the gods of olympus was that much more in reach.  

unfortunately, for the time being, he was so consumed by you. 

you, from across the campfire, sporting cutoff denim shorts and fresh wounds from the game earlier. you, who had wrapped your knuckles in gauze, concealing their bruising, fixed the chips in your nail polish and stacked rings on your fingers. (for the record: luke had gifted you the one on your left thumb.) you, with dark lips that whispered too closely and laughed too loudly with a child of aphrodite— jordan li.

you hadn’t so much as looked at luke since congratulating each other on another win. when chiron announced his weekly gratitude to the gods at the start of that night’s campfire, you didn’t punctuate your resentment with your usual eye-roll or biting remark. you were too busy giggling at something jordan said.

luke wanted to be the one to whisper jokes in your ear. he wanted to be the one you left lipstick stains on later, along his jaw and down his neck. he wanted to be the one who kissed the blade mark on your shoulder and the bruises on your knuckles. 

and yet, hours passed and it seemed that the thought of luke had never so much as crossed your mind. he found himself at an after hours party with a few senior campers on the beach. a lethal recipe: a poorly crafted bonfire, some contraband drinks and you in jordan li’s lap, playing with their hair and pretending luke castellan did not exist. 

meanwhile, luke had katie gardner’s full attention. she was talking to him about the strawberry season, potentially leaning a bit too close into luke’s personal space, definitely flirting with him. 

luke could have done a lot worse than the head counselor of the demeter cabin, who always smelled like fresh lavender, whose eyes were the bright green of spring grass and whose lips tasted like golden honey. 

the problem was that luke only wanted you, and his eyes kept sliding over to where you were kissing jordan’s cheek, and he accidentally called the girl he was kissing by your name, which did not make her happy. 

katie threw her drink in his face, told him to wake the fuck up, and walked away.

a chorus of gasps and chuckles erupted as luke stood there, diet coke and vodka seeping into his shirt. the commotion seemed to capture your attention, because you suddenly appeared next to luke, an empty bottle of cherry soda in your hand.

“rough night, tiger?” your voice, that nickname, made luke sick, his face twisting into a frown. you don’t seem to notice or care. instead, you switched your bottle with luke’s and took a sip.

“looks like you were having a pretty good time,” luke practically sneered. “where’s your date?” 

 “they went to bed.” you swallowed a mouthful of beer, grimacing at its bitterness. “gods, this is terrible. you and i should go on the drink run next time — we have better taste.”

“so, are you and jordan like a thing now?”

you gave luke a smile he didn’t quite understand, but made his stomach churn in ways only you could. “would that be a problem?”

“of course not.” he answered way too quickly for that to be true. 

“let’s get out of here,” you suggested. “i think katie is about this close to strangling you with a tree branch.”

luke glanced over your shoulder to where green eyes glared back at him. 

nowhere could luke find it in him to care. he wasn’t even sorry. he just shrugged, took the bottle back from you, took his first sip all night. luke almost gagged (because of course you were right, and the stoll brothers had better fake ids than they had taste) but he suppressed it. 

“no. i’m good.”

biggest lie he ever said. like there wasn’t anger caught in his throat and jealousy swelling between his ribs.

“go find jordan,” he taunted. “kiss them, show them a good time! isn’t that the reason why you got all pretty?”

you narrowed your eyes at him carefully. your nostrils were slightly flared, and luke took a bit of pride in being able to rile you up.

“look, we haven’t really talked lately, and i think we should.”

“go find jordan,” he mocked once more. “almost all the aphrodite kids are here, and i’m sure you can be quiet enough to sneak into their cabin and if you want a quick fu—”

“luke.” you clipped his name, obviously getting to the limit of your patience with him. “if you want to stay here all night and be an asshole, you’re welcome to. you should know, though, that your happy-go-lucky hero mask is starting to crack and i don’t know if you could deal with the fallout from it shattering completely.”

you leaned in close and whispered that last part, very aware of the chattering that stopped and the eyes that watched the pair of you anxiously. luke was usually good at hiding that part of himself who wanted to burn the world down. 

in ways you didn’t realize, you were right: he couldn’t risk revealing it, not now.

not yet. 

“do whatever you want, castellan,” you spat out his last name, the combination of letters foreign in your mouth.“i’m leaving.”

luke should be proud of himself. he waited a whole two seconds before following you like a stray dog. 

luke didn’t know if he’d ever felt you that enraged by him, and it horrified him. it also made him hungry for more. 

“i’m not sure that jordan would want the two of us alone together at night,” he shouted after you, words echoing into the starless sky.

“gods, enough about jordan!” luke practically ran into you with how fast you turned around to confront him. “i was helping them with that stupid aphrodite tradition!”

“you….” luke faltered, all the snark leaving his body. “what?”

luke remembered silena beauregard once explaining the rite of passage to him: to prove themselves, a child of aphrodite had to make someone fall in love with them, and then break their heart.

“why…why would you agree to do that?”

you had reached the dining area by then, and you sat on one of the steps leading to the pavilion. luke stayed a few feet away, looking at you cautiously. 

“jordan and i are already friends, and they figured a fake relationship would be the way to avoid anyone from actually getting hurt in the process.”

“you seemed so…so into it, though,” luke stammered, the memory of you in jordan’s lap, laughter bubbling from your lips, still fresh.

“it’s called acting, dumbass.” the camp didn’t rely on electricity, but there were enough torches around that luke could see you roll your eyes. “anyways, i was trying to give you a heads-up last night, but you wouldn’t listen.” you took a deep breath. “and, honestly, i didn’t push it because….i figured i should test a hypothesis.”

a hypothesis? you’d known annabeth for too long.

“what hypothesis?”

you hesitated. 

“it doesn’t matter. fuck, this was stupid,” you muttered, and without another word, stormed through the dining pavilion, a short cut to the hermes cabin. your footsteps fell heavy against the marble, and luke’s not far behind. 

“what hypothesis?” he asked again.

nothing but rushed footsteps.

“what hypothesis?” luke finally yelled.

third time was the charm, because you stopped in your tracks and faced luke once again. a fire burned in the bronze brazier, where campers were forced to offer up portions of your food to the gods at every meal. its roaring seemed to captivate you, and the flames danced across your face, illuminating all your curves and edges.

“i’m angry at the gods,” you stated. 

this caught luke off guard. from the day the two of you met, luke knew you shared that feeling. you’d gotten quieter with your rage as you’d gotten older. luke supposed he got better at hiding it himself, as well. 

“i’m angry at the gods for letting bad shit happen even if they can stop it, and for building this world in the fucked up way they did. i’m angry at your dad for the way he’s treated you, but — you, luke castellan.” you finally met luke’s eyes with a gaze so sharp, luke almost felt himself bleed. “i’m also angry at you, and not just for your bullshit tonight.” 

your admission felt like a punch to the stomach, and luke was left with no air to breathe.

did you know?

“you haven’t been the same since your quest,” you continued, words slow and deliberate, the way you spoke when you were worried your voice would shake. “and i’ve come to terms with that in the past few years, but you….you’ve never tried to ice me out before. you’ve been acting distant since december, and it’s been driving me insane. do you realize how much i miss my best …..” you swallowed the word friend. “how much i miss you?”

luke hesitated, because what could he say? i know i’ve been distant, but i’ve been busy trying to start a war between the gods. sorry babe! 

would you hate him, if you knew? 

you had to have known that, despite the distance, luke missed you. for tartarus sake, in the last two days, he’d driven himself mad at you calling a fourteen year old boy sweet, and he was about to combust at the image of you dating someone else, with little care as to the collateral damage. 

"you can't just avoid me, makeout with katie fucking gardner, and then….” you trailed off, hiding your face in your hands. whether it was to hide embarrassment or tears, luke wasn’t sure.

a smirk spread across luke’s face at the revelation that he hadn’t been the only one jealous at the bonfire that night. it lit luke up with the confidence he needed to not completely fall to his knees in front of you, beg for your forgiveness for everything he’s done.

“why do you care if i make out with katie fucking gardner?” 

as he waited for a response, luke walked towards you until your back hit one of the marble columns. 

“why do you care if i’m with jordan fucking li?” you clenched your jaw and looked right through luke. a clear indication that you wanted him to break down first; it wouldn’t be you who yielded this fight.

“because i want to be the one you’re with.” at that point, luke was so close to you that he swore he could hear your heartbeat. he reached out and played with the hem of your shorts. “why do you care if i make out with katie gardner?”

“because.” you drew in a sharp breath when luke’s fingers brushed underneath the denim, across the warm skin of your thigh. you closed your eyes. “don’t make me say it, tiger.” 

the desperation in your voice made luke want to do unholy things with you, to you. luke knew you didn’t think of him as a saint, and you never expected him to be one. the reality was that you weren’t much better, either. what was essentially an altar to the gods burned bright next to you, but it seemed neither of you had ever cared less about it than in that moment. 

luke would watch olympus fall. he would dethrone the gods and watch their glass castle shatter and find glory in a new world. in the grand scheme of things, he was willing to lose this battle.

in fact, he would have rather betrayed the titan lord himself than waste another second not kissing your lips. 

so, he kissed you, and you kissed him back with such force, such hunger, it was ungodly.

no, you certainly weren’t a saint — but you were divine, in the most brutal, intoxicating way. in the way you shuddered when luke lodged a leg between your thighs; in the way you threaded your fingers through the belt loops of his jeans to bring him closer; in the way the metal of your rings burned through the skin of his hip, right to the bone, which made him shudder, and you smile triumphantly against his jaw.

the more he tasted your smirk flavored by cherry soda and the ashes of nearby flames, the more he felt your feral teeth against his neck and your wicked nails digging into his shoulders, the more you tugged on his curls, the more luke thought: maybe. 

maybe you would give into your seething resentment, live up to those eye-rolls and snarky comments that got you in trouble with chiron, on the edge of hot water with the gods. maybe you would join the titan army. maybe, just maybe, this time, you would follow luke.

and yet — maybe wasn’t enough if it meant he could lose this. luke wouldn’t risk it, not until he kissed every battle scar and bruise on your body, and you did the same to his. 

“wait.”

it was the last thing luke wanted to do, but he complied. he took the opportunity to appreciate the chaos he created: your shirt in disarray, your lipstick a mess, your chest heaving and desperate to catch a breath. 

“i promised jordan that we’d keep up our charade for a week, two at the most. do you think we could keep this…” you tightened your fist around the fabric of his shirt. “a secret until then?”

luke responded by pressing his lips to yours once more, because there were definitely worse secrets to keep.

(vii. you wouldn’t hesitate to make him bleed)

luke had just left percy jackson to die.

he should be leaving camp, now, but he needed to see you one last time. 

the universe works in mysterious ways, because you were out on a run through the forest, and you crossed paths before he even had time to wonder where you were.

“hey, tiger.” you smiled as if this was a regular afternoon. the two of you would teach your afternoon activities, sneak away during dinner so luke could kiss you in that spot that made you gasp. “wanna join me? i was just wrapping up, but i could be convinced to go longer.”

for a second, he was tempted to. very tempted. 

“i don’t have much time.”

you seemed to notice luke’s sullen mood and you dropped your playful demeanor. 

luke explained: the messages from kronos in his dreams, him stealing the lightning bolt and helm of darkness to start a war between the gods and framing percy. the plan to destroy olympus that luke had pledged his life to.

percy was surprised at what luke had done, and luke could imagine that the rest of camp would be, too. luke was the golden boy of camp half-blood, everyone’s big brother. 

you, on the other hand, didn’t express any sense of shock. 

“luke.” you said his name like you weren’t quite sure it was poison. “i’m going to give you five seconds to tell me that you’re joking.”

five seconds of silence passed. you took a few steps back from luke.

“i….i should have told you sooner.”

“yeah,” you scoffed. “you should have. but, you didn’t. did it feel good, having the titan king whispering sweet nothings in your ear? all the lies about how this war is the only way to get the glory you so desperately want? it’s fucking delusional.” 

“it’s not delusional—”

“yes, it is!” you glared at him. “you’re on the wrong side of a war you made the mistake of starting.”

luke straightened his posture, thinking about how hypocritical you were being. 

“isn’t this what you’re all about? revenge, karma. your mom will probably join us, too. don’t you want to see the gods finally get what they deserve?”

“not like this. i can’t believe how desperate you are, to believe that kronos is going to make everything right. it’s pathetic,” you spat. “i’m not saying the gods don’t deserve to be taken down a notch. their fucking obsession with power and glory….it’s sick and twisted, but i don’t think your titan king is any better. i don’t think you are any better.” 

“it’s time that the gods fall. this is the only way, even if it isn’t perfect,” luke countered. his voice was firmer now as he absorbed your anger. your mother was the goddess of revenge, but you clearly didn't understand the sacrifices, pain, and blood that was required to make the world a better place.  

luke just needed to convince you.

“we’ve talked about this for years,” he continued. “nothing is balanced! there’s no justice here, for anyone.  we can build a better world where we don’t have to burn our scraps and throw ourselves at monsters to get attention. we can fight together like we always have. y/n, i love—”

“don’t,” you snapped. “don’t you fucking dare. you should have died on your quest.” your voice laced with venom. one hand gripping the knife you always kept on your belt. “that dragon should have fucking sliced through you and saved us all the trouble.”

something pricked in the back of his throat, down to his stomach.

“you don’t mean that.”

“i do,” you promised. “at least you would have died with all of us thinking you’re a hero instead of the traitor you really are.”

you grabbed your knife, took a fighting stance. 

“i’m not going to fight you,” was all luke could say. he noticed your hand tremble, and you tightened the grip on your knife to prevent emotion from slipping through your invisible armor. 

in that moment, you have could slice through luke, and it would hurt less than everything you just said, less than the murderous look you were giving him, like he was just another monster you wouldn’t think twice about sending to tartarus.

luke didn’t even have a chance to unsheathe his sword before you charged at him, but he quickly had you pinned to the ground, the tip of your own knife pointed at you. he hesitated. the blade pressed harder against your cheek than he intended, enough to break the skin and let a few droplets of dark crimson escape. 

“please come with me,” he pleaded. you didn’t answer, but you did seem surprised by the softness of his voice. 

a few moments passed, the celestial bronze still between you. luke waited for you to see his way, to yield to his proposal.

you didn’t. instead, you took advantage of the situation. you wrapped your leg around his and flipped your position. in the process, you regained possession of your knife. without the hesitation that held luke back, you sliced through his cheek, deep. luke bit his lip to suppress a groan, tasting blood. your gaze set his whole body on fire as he waited for your next move. that was when you glanced down at his camp necklace, and the new clay bead added to commemorate this summer.

a turquoise trident.

“percy told me he was on his way to see you,” you realized. “what did you do?”

luke didn’t answer. he knew then that a choice ran through your head. 

and it stung, just a little, watching you sprint away through the trees in a last ditch effort to save percy’s life. 

there was a small, pathetic part of luke that wanted you to choose him, even if it meant you would have plunged the knife into his chest.

[reiderwriter]

♡ Girls Just Wanna Have Fun ♡

Week 5 of my Playlist Series ♡

Summary: Spencer isn't used to clubs, but when duty calls, he's made to feel a little bit more welcome by a girl who seems to know him better than a stranger should.

Warnings: Smut 18+ Minors DNI!! Hotchner!Reader (Reader is Hotch's sister), semi-public sex (x2 oops), oral sex (m receiving), fingering, dry humping, hand job, cum play, dirty talk, degradation and name calling (slut only), use of daddy/sir even though this is like solidly season 1 Spencer lmao, corruption kink, loss of virginity (surprisingly the readers)

A/N: Every single intrusive thought I've ever had about s1 Reid tied up in a nice little bow masquerading as a song fic. It is finished, and now I feel flushed. Please expect only fluff from me until my next intrusive thought (maybe half an hour, probably no longer).

Masterlist || Spotify Playlist

Flashing lights and the scent of dried up alcohol stains weren't usually signs of Spencer Reid's presence. He'd managed to get through college - two degrees and three PhDs - without stepping foot into a nightclub. But now that he'd joined the BAU, it seemed to be an unavoidable occurrence. 

“The unsub hunts at this nightclub, I get that, I do. But why am I the one going in? He's targeting women,” he panicked as his older team member helped adjust his clothes to conceal the weapon he carried. 

“Because, pretty boy, it's student night, and you're the only one here who can pass for a 21 year old. I guess late puberty has some benefits.” Derek smacked his arm playfully, leaving the younger man wincing slightly. 

“But I'm not a woman.” 

“Yes, but you'll be able to walk around and note any suspicious behaviour, and then we can tail suspects you flag,” Hotch explained to him again. 

“Just act natural, kid, it's not like it's your first time in a club.” 

“It is.” His warnings fell on deaf ears though, as they pushed him out of the van and into the crowd of students queueing to enter. 

It didn't take you long to notice him after you arrived at the club.

The sweater vest was enough to make him stand apart slightly, as much as he was trying his best to blend in. A slight tingle of familiarity raced up your spine as his eyes awkwardly met yours, his scan of the room stopping short as he flushed and turned his eyes down. 

Pushing slightly to the crowd, you leaned over the counter next to him and tried to get the bartenders attention. It was loud and busy, but catching attention and keeping it was a skill you'd mastered early, a skill that you were thankful for as you realised the man's eyes were guiltily flicking between your ass and the crowd once again. 

“Are you going to stare, or are you going to introduce yourself,” you giggled, sliding closer to his perch at the bar, as he panicked, standing straighter. 

“I wasn't, um… your dress, there's a rip at the edge of your skirt, I was trying to figure out if it was part of the design because I know some clothes these days have damage built into the design, or if it was in need of some emergency… sewing.” His hands gesticulating awkwardly throughout his explanation, as if anxious to show you the jumble in his brain was entirely pure and innocent, even as the flush on his face said otherwise. 

“And your name is?” 

“I-.... Spencer. My name is Spencer.” 

You stood a little straighter hearing the name, that familiarity warming you more. Spencer. Spencer. Spencer. You turned the name over in your head but took another step closer as the crowd shifted in a wave, feeling the heat coming off his body. 

“Well, Spencer,” your tongue made the decision to act for your brain, the words coming out before you could stop them. “What conclusion did you draw? Do you think the rip was intentional or not?” 

Gently, you grabbed his hand and led it to the fabric. The skirt wasn't scandalously short, but short enough to suit the dark heated atmosphere of the club at least, but as his fingers grazed the back of your thighs, still hesitant in his actions, you found yourself wishing it were just that bit higher, so his hands would have to reach further up. 

With a gaze over your shoulder at the crowd, Spencer found himself at an impass. He'd already noted a few people of interest, loiterers, men getting a bit rough and aggressive in the club, people on the outskirts (like him, he supposed) that could possibly be their unsub. 

He'd been given the all clear to disengage and leave the club as effortlessly as he could  bit something in your initial gaze had pinned him to place at the bar, and refused still to let him see reason. 

“I think it's a design feature. To draw attention to…” he swallowed hard, but you weren't sure if he was just being delicate about his words or if he was reacting to the hand that was now on him, dragging nails up from his abdomen to his chest. 

“Good observation, Spencer.” 

“Your name. You didn't tell me what your name was.” He said, grabbing your hand to stop its progress and breathing deeply as if to clear his head. 

“Y/N. We should dance.” Without giving him time to react, you abandoned your drink on the counter and pulled his arm around your waist, dragging him out to the crush of people in the middle of the dance floor. 

His protests were lost in the pulse of the music, as you kept your back to him and began grinding and swaying against him. His hands tightened on your hips as he gently started moving with you, and you threw your head back to catch his eye again. 

Spencer didn't know what he'd gotten himself into. He knew that very little actually dancing actually went on at a club, that this was just a more polite socially acceptable form of foreplay, but he didn't know that it would have such an effect on him. 

A mess of sweaty, intoxicated people spilling drinks and other fluids, and he thought he'd stay there forever if it kept your hips torturing his cock like that. 

When you glanced up at him, he was a man lost to his senses, lust clouding his eyes, mouth slightly open in a pant, you reached up to his neck and pulled his lips down to meet yours. 

You were surprised when it was his to guess to reach out first, his hand that trailed under your shirt without tours guiding it. You'd picked up a fairly innocent man at the bar and turned him into a pervert in the space of one dance. It felt like the club was watching you, how his hands grazed the skin under your breasts and caused the shiver up your spine, how your back arched to press deeper against his election. 

You may have tempted him into taking this risk, but he was the one gleefully nosediving into his fall from grace. 

“Spencer,” you whispered as he came up for air, lips resting at your ear. “I think we should get some fresh air.” 

Something in that seemed logical. It was colder outside. Maybe it would cool off whatever had lit him up like a pyre on the dance floor. Maybe the fresh air would clear his head. Or maybe just the open space would help him detangle his hands from you, would lead his thoughts away from burying himself deep in you. 

He would gladly take you outside, bid you farewell, and return to his job and his life. It was a solid exit for his first cover - who was going to question the young lovers leaving together. 

You had a feeling that the idea of outside would have Spencer pulling away from you, but you hadn't had your fill of fun just yet. 

So just as you led him onto the dancefloor, you kept a hand over his, around your waist, and you guided him out of the club, down the street a few paces, and into a darkened alleyway. 

“Y/N, we shouldn't be-” he tried to stutter out as you pulled him in for another kiss. His brain was trying to protest, but his hands were already back on your ass, pulling you up and closer to him. 

“What was that?” You said between kisses, his mouth launching an assault against each inch of your skin. 

He gasped for breath and pulled back, realising that he'd lifted and pinned you to the cold brick wall of the alley in his haste to feel you pressed against him. 

“Y/N… I don't want to take advantage of you, I'm not-” 

“I'm taking advantage of you, Spencer,” you said, nipping at his neck slowly raking your hands into his shoulders. “Am I allowed to do that? Can I take all of you, Spencer?” 

His eyes rolled back in his head as he let put a groan of pleasure, your lips sucking at the tender flesh of his nape. 

“I-I'm not a student, and-” 

“I know, but you are such a pretty boy that I decided I wanted to have some fun with you.” 

His resolve broke in half as you uttered your compliments, and his lips met yours in a moan as his hands pushed your skirt up around your waist. 

His finger trailed between your hips and his, using the wall to balance you as he pushed aside your panties and began slowly stroking your sex. 

Your hips pitched forward to press more of his slender fingers against you,  desperate to feel him stretch your cunt open first with one, then two, then however many he decided was good enough for you. 

Leaving one hand on his shoulder, you let one trail down his pants, stepping one foot down to allow you access to his zipper. 

He pauses Again for a second as you manage to get his pants open, your hand pulling his cock free from the constraint of his clothing. Spitting on your hand, you wrap around it firmly and slowly pump up and down, looking him directly in the eye as you watch the pleasure pour over him. 

His forehead rests against yours as he melts into your touch, so desperate, needing to cum so badly that he's willing to let it happen in this dark dirty alley. 

“Spencer, I want to have a lot of fun with you. Will you let me?” 

“Yes, fuck Y/N.” He nods, his hips rocking into your hand with each slow stroke you give him. 

“Spencer,” you say, rocking your hips forward and pushing your panties further to the side once again. “Spencer, please fuck me. Take my virginity, Spencer, please.” 

His mind whirled at the sentence, the pleas dropping from your lips. Virginity. You were a virgin. 

You'd had him cock stiff after three minutes of conversation  had pulled him into an alleyway and lost him in a fog of pleasure, and you were still innocent. Untouched. 

You wanted to have your fun with him. You'd chosen him. 

He couldn't articulate the lust that coated his tongue, so he simply pushed it into your mouth  grabbed his cock from your hands, lined himself up with your drippy cunt and pushed in with a single thrust. 

You gasped and let out a moan, not quite fully pleasurable. Your hands again found his shouldend, his back, but your nails were sharper this time, digging in further, almost piercing skin. 

“Fuck, Spencer, yes,” you said, breathing shakily as you slowly started moving around his cock. 

“Did it hurt?” 

“It doesn't hurt anymore. Now, please Spencer, fuck me and don't hold back. It's more fun that way.” 

He pulled your hips closer, moaning as you tightened around him. Pressing one hand against the wall and keeping another hand gripped so hard around your hip you knew it'd bruise, he began moving. 

He began slow, trying not to lose himself in the feel of your unused, tight hole. But with each small moan, each scratch against his back, he lost a little bit more of that control he was begging for. 

With his hands engaged, his brows furrowed I'm frustration that he couldn't stroke your bundle of nerves, he couldn't force you to cum on his cock as quickly as he wanted to. 

“Y/N, look at me.” You opened your eyes at the words, unaware that they'd closed tight as you emptied all other senses to just feel him. 

“Touch yourself. Right there, that's it,” he watched your fingers rub delicately against your skin, spoke little words of encouragement, and told you to increase your speed and pleasure. 

“That's it. That's it, now it's time for you to cum, Y/N. Cum on my cock, rub your little clit for me and cum around my big cock, Y/N.” 

“Shit… shit, shit, shit, Spencer, oh my god.” Your hands shook, and your hips twitched, and with a cry, you reached that high you'd been craving since you met his eyes earlier. 

He pulled out of you, slowly pulling you off the wall, as he held you up, letting your legs regain their strength. His cock was still hard, still coated in your arousal as he took care of you. 

You caught your breath fast, regained tour strength quicker as you noticed he didn't plan on getting himself off anymore. He let you have your fun with him and was happy to end it all there. 

You weren't. 

“Spencer,” you sang again, wrapping a hand once again around his erection as he tried to straighten out your now slightly more ripped skirt. “Spencer, it's more fun of we both cum. I want you to make a mess of my hand, can you do that for me?” 

You stroked his cock with a firmer grip than before, your arousal lubricating each stroke, his pre-cum mingling with it to aid you further. You suddenly wondered what he would taste like, but knew your legs would be too weak to do everything your heart desired today. 

There was always tomorrow. 

He leaned his weight back on the wall behind you, forcing you back as well as you pumped him quickly so desperate to hear him moan your name as he spilt his seed. 

“Y/N,” he moaned, and you were triumphant. His hips jerked once, then twice, then a third time, and he stilled, heaving breaths as he buried his head in your shoulder. 

He swallowed and regained his breath, and as he pulled away, you pulled your fingers to your lips and lapped up the final drops of cum that he left there. 

Most of it had his the wall, dripped to the floor, but you enjoyed these few drops and smiled brightly at him, pulling a handkerchief that you knew would be in his pocket out and cleaning the two of you up. 

He flushed again as he came back to his senses, especially as you attempted to put his clothed to rights, stepping back to replace his softening cock in his pants.

“Well,” you said after setting yourself to rights, “Thank you for the fun night, Spencer. See you tomorrow.” 

You skipped off quickly before he had a second to even process your words. 

The next day at the local precinct was a blur for Spencer as he tried to drag himself from the drug induced haze of meeting you. He'd stroked himself to completion two more times in bed after he returned to his motel room, reliving the sound of you begging him to take you, the words ‘pretty boy’ on your lips as you spread your legs. 

It'd taken his entire brain, or what was left of it, to not jump out of his skin every time Morgan had teased him with the words that morning.

“Now how did you like your first club experience, pretty boy? Did any college cuties throw themselves at you?” 

He spat up his coffee, choosing that moment to choke, and begging god for this to just be the end of Spencer Reid entirely. 

Because there was no way Morgan would actually believe that that was exactly what had happened. 

“Morgan, Gideon wants you in the interrogation room, and- wow, Spencer, you should change your shirt. What are you, 5? You can't drink coffee properly?” Elle said, chuckling slightly.

“I choked,” he frowned, but it fell on deaf ears as his teammates walked away quickly to get back to their jobs. 

He wished he could recover so quickly, even now the image of you having your fun with him the night before playing like a movie in his head. 

Looking down, he realised Elle was right, and he really did need to change his shirt. Hotch always had a few spare on hand, even for cases out of the office. He grabbed some tissues, dabbing against the mess of coffee on his shirt, suddenly thankful for lukewarm police precinct coffee, and started making his way towards Hotch. 

“Hey, Hotch-” he made it three steps before your voice cried out. 

“Ronnie!!” You shouted, throwing your hands around your elder brother as he caught you in a hug. 

“Y/N, we're at a police station. If you're going to come see me, you have to at least call me Aaron.” 

“And not take the chance to embarrass you in front of your peers and coworkers? Not a chance, Ronnie. Not a chance.” He chuckled fondly, brushing away his complaints quickly as he turned to introduce you to JJ first, then Elle and then the frozen statue that had replaced Spencer. 

“And, Y/N, this is Dr. Spencer Reid. Spencer, this is my sister, Y/N. She's a student at the university.” 

You held out your hand with a triumphant grin as Spencer stared in wide-eyed horror at the apparition in front of him. 

“Hello, Spencer. It's very nice to finally meet you. My brother has told me a lot about you, and I'm very excited to pick your brains.” 

The air seemed to explode around Spencer as each breath became deliriously hot, filling his lungs with fire. It was moments before he realised that he wasn't actually breathing at all, and the air was actually quite normal. 

Your hand remained out, ready to greet him, and to the surprise of his coworkers, he took it in his for a short shake. 

“Y/N. Hotch's sister, Y/N. Nice to meet you, Y/N Hotchner, Hotch's sister.” 

He could practically hear the audible sound of Elle and JJ smacking a hand against their faces in horror at his stupidly obvious reaction to the woman in front of him. If he wasn't careful, he'd be spouting confessions of desire soon, and knowing that Aaron Hotchner carried two guns on his person even now did nothing to calm his thoughts. 

“Okay, well, Y/N, I'm busy with some interrogations now, but I can drive you back to your apartment in half an hour if you're okay to wait with JJ?” 

“Are you busy, Spencer?” You asked instead, keeping her eyes locked on the man who still weakly shook her hand, unaware of when the right time to stop would be. 

“I was serious when I said I wanted to pick your brain, my brother said you had a PhD in Engineering and I'm struggling through a class right now that I need some guidance in if you can spare five minutes?” 

Spencer stared between Hotch and you, looking for the right answer to please present itself before he imploded right there. 

“Yes. PhD, I have a PhD. Three actually, but whose counting? Me. I just counted them. One of them is in mathematics, actually, so I guess I'm always counting.” He finally dropped your hand, and you gave him a wider smile that dropped his heart to his stomach. “I am free, unless you needed me for something else, Hotch?” 

His gaze was pleading, though he wasn't sure if he was begging for his life, five more minutes alone with you or the power to extricate himself from this situation entirely, but Hotch nodded his acceptance quickly and let you lead Spencer off to the small, empty visitors room at the opposite side of the precinct. 

You shut the door behind you when you walked in, leaning over to close the blinds as well before you turned back to Spencer. 

“Your shirt is wet. You should probably take it off,” you giggled as you trailed a hand up his arm once again. 

His hand grabbed yours before you could do any more damage to his tender nerves than you'd already managed that morning. 

“You knew the entire time? Who I was?” 

“I walked over because you seemed familiar, but I only figured it out when you said your name. My brother does talk about you a lot.”

“Hotch is going to kill me,” he said, slumping down into the chair behind him. “Y/N, your brother was outside the club. He could've seen us leave.” 

You climbed into his lap, and his eyes finally met yours again, his tongue stopping its hopeless tirade as you relaxed into his chest. 

“I have two older brothers, Spencer. Do you know how often they've been able to tell me what to do?” Your hands started down his shirt, making quick work of the buttons as he stared up, enthralled. 

“Not once have they been able to stop me from doing something I wanted.” 

He scoffed quickly, unable to help himself. Your hands gripped either side of his face and lifted his head to meet your gaze again. 

“And right now, Spencer, I really want you.” A roll of your hips was enough to have him hissing and grabbing your hips. You started steadily rocking into him, eyes still locked with his. 

“Y/N, please let's be sensible.” 

“I don't want to be sensible, I want to have fun. I want to suck your dick right here, and let you cum in my mouth. I want to scream your name and let everyone know who is giving me pleasure. Can't I do that, Spencer?” 

“No,” he groaned, his eyes screwed shut as you dry humped him, trying to get yourself off on his lap, his.cock rising with each of your quiet moans. 

“Spencer, please. I want your big, hard cock back inside me. Please, please, please. I'll be a good girl, I promise.” 

His eyes shot open in incredulity as he watched you use his body as you saw fit. 

“Good girls don't lose their virginities in alleyways, Y/N. Good girls don't throw themselves at their brothers' coworkers. Good girls listen when they're told no, and don't try to suck cock in public, like little sluts.” He spat each word at you, bit you enjoyed each insult he hurled your way, enjoyed the way his body recoiled as he finally called you a slut. 

He seemed slightly shocked by his anger himself, but you didn't seem to care. It took you only seconds after to push your lips against his again and have your hands on his cock once again, pulling him out of his pants as his hands explored you just as eagerly. 

“Yeah, Spencer, your little slut. I'm such a little slut for you, please fuck me.” 

He buried a hand in your hair, tipping your head back so his tongue could probe deeper, his other hand already under your shirt and teasing one nipple. You lifted your hips and sunk down onto his cock, neither of you stopping to think again about your actions as you began to rode him. 

“30 minutes, Y/N, by now we have 24 minutes and 17 seconds. Can you manage that, Y/N?” 

“Yes, sir.” You said, feeling his dick twitch as you rode him. “Oh did you like that? You liked me calling you, sir?” His hips pressed up again, his body answering more honestly than his tongue. 

“What else can I call you? Spencer… sir….daddy?” 

He broke away from his place buried in your neck to push the two of you down to the floor, the new angle had you gasping as a hand covered your mouth stifling any screams you could make before you made them. 

“Be quiet and cum on my cock, Y/N,” he whispered and picked up his pace, one hand gagging you while the other pulled painfully at your nipple, pinching it between two hands and using it to lift your entire chest so your body was arched toward him, letting him go deeper. 

“Yes, Daddy,” you whispered again, against his fingers, tempted to wrap your lips around one and suck it into your mouth. 

“Fuck, just call me Spencer, Y/N.” 

But you couldn't respond, suddenly overcome with the numbness of you orgasm washing over you as you bit back a choked cry. 

“That's it, good job, Y/N. You listen so well, good job.” He rubbed soothing circles into your chest as his hips slowed, working you through your orgasm as he withdrew once again. 

This time though, he didn't try to pull away and leave himself hard, but sat himself up, and lifted you once again too, putting slight pressure at the back of your head until you were on your knees and letting your head fall down, down, down as your lips wrapped around his wet cock. 

You took him in your mouth, and tasted the bitter, salty flavor of your illicit activities, lapping every last bit of your joint pleasure up as he pushed your hair up and down his cock. 

It didn't take long for his hips to press up into your mouth slightly harder than before, his hands holding you steady as he came down your throat. He held your head there for a minute two, as you tried your best to breathe and stay there, taking as much of his cum down your throat as you could. He pulled your head off him and you swallowed the rest, smiling brightly at him as you did so. 

“Thank you for the fun, Spencer,” You said again, grabbing your phone and checking the time. 

Standing up, you pulled your clothes back in place, pulling your skirt down and your panties up, smoothing out the tangles in your hair. 

“Let me go get you that spare shirt, Doctor Reid,” you said, opening the door. “I'm very grateful for your help with my class load, sir.” 

His head fell back into his hands as you closed the door, leaving him to wonder just what the hell he'd got himself in for. 

[bittersuitejacobs]

• an unhealthy obsession •

{Nate Jacobs/Original Character}

Ophelia is no stranger to wanting. For most of her life it's all she'd been allowed to do, trapped on the outside looking in, window shopping for normal experiences. Ophelia is also no stranger to obsession. Books, movies, TV shows; a terribly ill child who never even had the chance to make a real friend, she took what she could from fiction. All she'd ever wanted growing up, the thing she obsessed over, was someone who could save her, from her life, from herself. Someone who could make her feel alive.

So when her attention is caught by a beautiful, awful boy with a saviour complex, Ophelia vows not to remain a stranger to him either, no matter the cost.

Ophelia may no longer need to be saved, but Nate Jacobs makes her feel so damn alive, so she will turn herself into the kind of girl he wants, needs, and obsesses over too.

• in which Ophelia and Nate are somehow not the worst things to ever happen to each other. •

Warnings: Explicit Smut, Mutual Obsession, Stalking, Manipulative Behaviour, Possessive Behaviour, Infidelity/Cheating, Drinking, Violence, Non-Consensual Drug Use & Sexual Assault, Childhood Parental Abuse (Medical/Psychological/Emotional). Chapters will contain specific warnings.

{ fic playlist }

+ IN PROGRESS +

[ Season One ]

1. spectacle

2. the slate cleaned

3. knight in shining armour

4. according to plan

5. unexpected ink

6. daddy's angel

7. a week of turtlenecks

8. like and subscribe

9. dirty little secret

10. praise kink

11. deja vu

12. little black dress

13. fight flight fawn freeze

14. the aftermath of violence

15. boot theory

16. i quite enjoy ruining your day

17. mutually assured destruction

18. detriments of the modern age

19. justly serv'd

20. sanctuary

21. paper stars

[ Season Two ]

22. resolutions

23. bpm

+ ...

[ Alternate Universe ]

cool for the summer

Nate's been best friends with Lee Chase for as long as he can remember, and Lee's little sister Ophelia has always been... there. The best thing about her is how easy she is to ignore.

But everything changes between them when Lee and his dad go to Fiji for the Summer before their Junior year, and Nate and Lee's moms decide to spend that time holidaying together up the coast, taking the rest of their children with them.

So now, much to Nate's chagrin, he's forced to share a bed with his best friend's sixteen year old sister, who he's barely even had a full conversation with before in his life. But he quickly realises that she's bolder than he gave her credit for. Maybe it's a good thing her brother's on the other side of the world.

Warnings: Explicit Smut, Possessive Behaviour, Underage Drinking, Ongoing Parental Neglect/Emotional Abuse, Compulsive Over exercising as a Form of Self Harm, Mental Healthy & Unreality Struggles. Chapters will contain specific warnings.

1. Reintroduce

2. Reinvent

3. Recontextualise

4. Reconfigure

5. Realise

6. Revitalise

7. Reiterate

8. Reconnect

9. Restring

+ ...

Posting of completed chapters for the main fic will begin in the next few days.

Posting of the AU will begin after Chapter 10 of the main fic and will alternate.

THE TAGLIST IS ALWAYS OPEN !

(just message or comment to be added; I'll add you to the taglist for both unless you let me know you only wanna be tagged for updates from one)

[holydrakes]

Aight I'm building a (tentative friends to best friends to lovers) SoMa playlist and so far the songs I've gathered:

Pre-canon (trauma development era)

- Love Triangle (Raelynn) : Maka watching her parents' trainwreck of a marriage over the years.

- Confessions of a Broken Heart (Daughter to Father) (Lindsay Lohan) : Maka ultimately putting all the blame on Spirit.

- Numb (acoustic, Veer Union cover) : Soul feeling sick of trying to live up to his family's expectations.

- Hate Myself (NF) : Soul finally struggling with self-loathing but still wanting to find an identity for himself that he's happy with.

Pre-chapter 0 to Italy fiasco:

1.) Daddy Issues (The Neighborhood) : Soul talking about Maka's daddy (and mommy) issues of course.

2.) Whataya Want From Me (Adam Lambert): them falling into the rhythm of being weapon and meister and Soul becoming what exactly Maka needs everytime

3.) Vulnerable (Selena Gomez) : Maka tentatively trying to trust Soul.

4.) I'll be There for You (The Rembrandts/Boyce Avenue cover) : Soul's the man song. Nuff said. Idc it's the Friends theme song, it suits him.

5.) My Life Would Suck Without You (Kelly Clarkson) Maka's PoV song, it's the song for every vitriolic best buds there are in general.

6.) At All Costs (from Wish) : describe how these two are insanely protective of each other in general.

Black Blood era (Experiment to Baba Yaga)

7.) Sell your Soul (Hollywood Undead) : the black blood and little demon are here to stir shit up. Soul's old demons are finally here to eat him up. Oh no.

8.) Breathe Into Me (Red) : Soul's PoV. His struggles with the black blood and facing his issues continues and he cries for help.

9.) Awake and Alive (Skillet) : helping each other through the Black Blood.

10.) Drag Me Down (One Direction/Twenty One Two cover) : Soul's PoV. "I wanna get stronger for Maka" song

Spartoi Era (Salvage to Battle on the Moon)

11.) Issues (Julia Michaels) : Maka's PoV. This song gave me Envy-Sloth chapter vibes. Maka's issues resurfacing.

12.) Stereo Hearts (Maroon 5/Jason Chen cover) : Soul's PoV. Talking about how he kinda owes his musical identity to Maka too in some ways and that despite Maka's insecurities about feeling left out of Soul's musical side. She def has a part in it, boy does she have a part in it.

13.) All of Me (Jason Chen & Madilyn Bailey cover) : after all those last remaining walls started to shatter between them...

14.) Stand by You (Rachel Platten/Alex Goot and co cover) : the "I'll follow you to the ends of the earth" song

15.) Face My Fears (Utada Hikaru)

Post-canon era (based on common post-canon fic scenarios)

16.) Out of My League (Stephen Speaks) : Soul's PoV. Pining pining pining. (Oh the agony of being the one falling first lol)

17.) Could it Be (from Kim Possible) : Maka's dramatic Love Epiphany song i guess. (She fell much harder lol)

18.) Waiting for Yesterday (David Archuleta) : Soul's PoV. Closest song to the whole 'I'm not your dad. I won't treat you like he did to your mom' thing.

19.) You & I (One Direction) : Soul's PoV. Soul trying to convince Maka they are not going to be like her parents reminding her of all their trials together.

20.) Unbreakable (Carole & Tuesday) : Maka's PoV. The song that perfectly describes what their relationship is all about from start to finish. Maka musing that they indeed somehow fit together despite everything and they're unbreakable.

21.) Love Me Like You do (Ellie Goulding) : At last, no more beating around the bush.

[cressthebest]

Crimson Rivers thoughts pt. 5

chapter 9:

1. OMG DID REMUS FORGET TO GO BACK TO HIS CELL WAIT HOLY SHIT THIS ISNT GONNA BE GOOD

2. oh good wait, remus left and came back

3. sirius’ first thought is to brush his teeth to kiss sirius 😭😭 he’s so me fr. i wouldn’t let my ex kiss me unless they brushed their teeth first. or had a mint. im so sensitive to smells

4. “He used to build things. Create things. And now he's lucky if he doesn't destroy what's already formed.” JESUS FUCK. THATS LITERALLY SO SAD WTF

5. 😭😭😭 sirius is literally amidst gay panic beyond your wildest comprehension and remus is just like ✨☺️😏🥱🩷🏳️‍🌈 “touch me”

BABES

6. “Remus hums. "Imagine how I feel. No one's touched me without causing me pain in five years."” NOOOO BABY

7. god, wolfstar deserves everything. the best wolfstar content i find is always in a fic that is centered on another ship. i could literally survive off wolfstar alone- no water, no food, no air

8. wolfstar calling each other beautiful>>>>>>>

9. 😬 what did sirius jsut say. i must be going crazy. cause there’s no way he just said he needed to brush his teeth

10. wolfstar deserves the world universe

11. reg is no longer a pathetic teen with a crush, he’s a pathetic adult with a crush

12. reg being grumpy even in his sleep <33333

13. james having a pathetic crush on reg while cuddling together is top tier

14. there really needs to be an emoji to accurately show the face i just made. it probably looks similar to this- 😀😟 what. there’s no way reg is about to tease james, just to get his old 14 year old self off

15. 😀😀 girl what is he doing. i-

16. how he became freinds with barty is so crimson rivers canon, i can’t even. like, i KNOW that it’s canon. but it’s also canon that bizzarestars was right about. no author mistakes in that piece

17. damn, reg is actually gonna go at it. i don’t know how james is gonna survive this and make it to the actual arena.

18. “James says his name like it's the only word that has meaning. His voice is rough, and Regulus' name is sloppy and desperate in his mouth, like a hail mary or a form of salvation.” CHRIST. I SAID I DIDNT KNOW HOW JAMES WOULD SURVIVE THIS, BUT HOW THE HELL DID REG SURVIVE THIS??

19. “Barty is a good lover, there's no denying that—but he'll be damned if James isn't just better.” 😟 shocked. omg. who would have guessed this would be reggie’s thoughts

20. “"Because you might die today," Regulus tells him bluntly, shrugging one shoulder as he stands up. "Consider it a parting gift. Now, get out."”

😧

they just fucked, and all reg can do is be like “yeah yeah, now get out horny bitch” no fucking way i just read that right i-

bitch that’s foul

21. “Regulus is a conundrum, honestly.” yes. that’s the word i’d use to describe him.

22. james: don’t tell sirius that reg and i just fucked. also james: “he’s in the shower”

bitch if you could be any more obvious

23. “Remus Lupin. If there's one good thing to come out of all this, it's him.” YES YES YES ABSOLUTELY! REMUS IS THE GOOD IN THIS

24. “”James, I am so grateful to know you, and so sorry that I had to. Every name that I call is a name I wish I never learned. Yours—you—will remain etched into my heart forever."” BITCH I CANT CRY OVER THIS- MY EYE MAKEUP LOOKS TOO GOOD TODAY TO CRY

25. “"I'll see you again soon, Regulus."” BITCH WTF THAT HURTS EVEN MORE THAN JAMES’ GOODBYE

26. maybe it’s been too long since i’ve read the books, BUT this fic seems to capture the absolute tragedy and horrors of it before it even starts even more

27. christ, not reg saying the “i don’t want to go” that hurts. like holy fuck. he’s still just a scared child. don’t put him in that arena

28. god, the way the death of james feels like sirius dying too. and sirius deciding that once james is dead, sirius will be too

how the hell is this people’s comfort fic???

29. not sirius having a lapse of memory and losing his memory of his last moments with james. that shit hurts

30. fabian <3333

31. 😧 wait fabian is dead. they just shot him. holy shit

32. gideon <3333

33. wait gideon is dead too.

y’all. i just-

this whole chapter was a fucking rollercoaster.

[writerscafehub]

𝐌𝐄𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐁𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐀: 𝐕𝐢𝐜

@sunflowersteves || @sunflowerstevesmain

From one to five stars, how would you rate your writing? (No downplaying yourself!)

3.5 bc I read an old fic the other day and I’ve improved soooooo much but there’s always room for improvement!

2. What do you think makes your writing stand out from other works? I feel like I’m really good at requests.

Sometimes I think it’s hard to imagine what someone is asking for, but as a daydreamer I feel like I can visualize it so well. 

3. Are there any writers that inspire you?

Famous authors include Toni Morrison, Stephen King (minus the cocaine💀), and Neil Gaiman. In the server, literally everyone inspires me all the time and is so so supportive. Some mutuals that I so aspire to write like are @moonlightprose, @fushic0re, @darkficsyouneveraskfor, @fluffyprettykitty

4. What’s the fic you’re most proud of?

I would have to say first time (a carmen berzatto x reader) or broken hearts (eddie munson x reader). I think I really capture Carmen and Eddie’s characterization, especially how they would act in a relationship. Also, for sure my best angst. 

5. Which character(s) do you find easiest to write and which do you find most difficult to write?

I’m a hyperfixation girly so the easiest are ones that I’m currently obsessed with (joel, miguel o’hara, etc.) and the most difficult are the ones that I still love but have fallen off the obsession wagon (Steve Rogers, geralt, din djarin, etc.) 

6. Who or what do you find yourself writing about most?

Smut bc I’m a hoe ✨ also it’s been a year and joel miller wont leave my mind, so 

7. Tell us about a WIP you’re excited about!

This has literally been on my WIP for over a year, but it has to be a notting hill AU with Sam wilson. I’ve been excited to write that for ages. 

8. First fandom you ever wrote for?

Marvel. I wrote a spider girl fic when I was in middle school lmao

9. Any guilty pleasure trope(s)? jealousy fics and protective fics,,, yum 

10. A trope you’ll never, ever write for.

Prolly the divorce trope bc I get so mad at characters. 

11. Wildest fic you’ve ever written?

It was a request but eddie munson x reader with a guitar head in the coochie and it was great.

12. Favorite pairing to write for? (platonic or romantic!)

I love poly fics! Love Stucky x reader and steddie x reader are my fav. they’re just so good. 

13. Do you listen to anything while you write?

I usually have to listen to classical or lofi beats bc I’ll get distracted soooo easily. 

14. One-shots or multi-chaptered works?

One shots 

15. Have you ever daydreamed about side adventures/spin-offs from your fic? Tell us about them!

As a certified day dreamer, absolutely. Any longer fic I’ve written, I literally day dream how it’s gonna play out. I did that a lot with ain’t no sunshine (joel miller x reader). 

16. Is there anything you’ve wanted to write, but you’ve been too scared to try?

I am so bad at angst and I would love to write action/violent fics but I always feel like I can’t describe it for the life of me. 

17. What’s the nicest comment you’ve ever received?

Someone commented that they turned my notifications on so that they could see when I posted the fic and that made me giggle and kick my feet. 

18. Have you ever gone outside of your comfort zone for a fic? How did it turn out?

It’s currently a work in progress, but it’s a period smut fic. It’s not necessarily out of my comfort zone but more of I’ve never written a fic like that before. It’s for Miguel. I’m so ready 👀

19. Tooth-rotting fluff or merciless angst?

tooth-rotting fluff 

20. Do you have any OCs? Tell us about them!

I do not ❤️ 

21. If you could enter the universe of any one of your fics, which would it be and why?

I would die in literally every sci-fi or fantasy world that I love (star wars, game of thrones, lord of the rings, the last of us, attack on titan, etc.) so I’m gonna have to pick marvel. I’d have a fighting chance. 

22. Is there anything you wish your audience knew about your writing or writing process?

tbh the hardest part for me is starting. Introductions tear me down every time rip. Sometimes, I just start in the middle because it’s so much easier. 

23. Copy and paste an excerpt you’re particularly fond of.

You pause, just for a moment. You could feel the adrenaline kick into your system, and a numbing pain flushed out your senses. The blood felt warm and sticky—prompting the sleepiness to feel calming, and it urged you forward into its safe surroundings. But then you felt it. Panic. Panic rose in your neck as you looked around for someone. Your hand darted out to try and find them, but your mind was starting to become blank from the fuzzy warmth of pain. Joel. You needed Joel. 

24. Ramble about any fic-related thing you want!

Ok listen, I wanna write so bad. The last fic I wrote was in March and I’m feeling that writing withdraw. My brain needs to get into hyperdrive so my fingers can type all day long. I have so many fics planned

[em-harlsnow]

the shameless character ages drive me crazy! I made an age chart a few years ago for a fic I never published and managed to kinda make it fit? The major hiccup I found was that the lip/ian Irish twins popular trope doesn’t work because lip mentions in s1 that he’s 17 (which would also make mickey at least 17 because they were in the same classes). so I kinda concluded from that that mickey’s birthday was actually august 93 and lip’s was march 94. ian’s was may 96 which means he turned 15 between seasons 1 and 2. 1.12 - 3.01 takes place over the course of a year - s1 must end between lip’s march birthday and ian’s may birthday of 2011 and 3x01 begins Easter of 2012. this works with mickey turning 18 in 2011 but still returning to juvie because some youths can apparently stay in juvie in illinois until they’re 21. I think I ended up figuring out that the first 5 seasons happen over the course of 4 years and the rest happen over the course of around 6 years (from debbie’s pregnancy to just after franny’s 5th birthday). sorry this whole ask is chaotic af 🤣 but I thought I’d add my 2 cents

my one point of issue with this - although it's all opinion based so you could be right - is that Lip and Mickey can be in the same class and be different ages. Mickey can still be 16 when in Lip's year or grade, since he's born in August. he's born just before the cut off (at lease the cut-off that I know of would be September) so he can be in the same grade and just be one of the youngest. I might be wrong, because the season is set in winter so I guess Mickey's bday must have passed, but idk. I don't remember seeing Lip say he's 17, and when I looked it up google (which is very easily wrong about these things) said he's also 16 in season 1. I'm not sure though, if you know which ep/scene he says it that would be helpful.

also, sorry to go on, but if mickey's birthday was august 1993, he would be in the year above Lip, because he'd be just before the September cut off. There's a chance he was moved down to Lip's grade or I've heard of people born around august/September getting to choose which grade, but I think it's more likely that it was 1994.

also, I've heard from most people that season 1 and 2 take place over a year total, so I don't know what you mean with the '1.12-3.01 taks place over the course of a year'. I was always under the impression that 1.1 - 2.12 took place over around a year. I could be wrong, though.

another reason I think mickey is younger for longer, is that Ian is meant to be 17 at the start of season 4 and 15 at the start of season 1. this seems pretty fucking impossible to be honest, and I'll try and figure it out when I do his ages next, but it doesn't make sense for mickey to go up about three/four years in age while Ian only ages 2.

my theory may not be entirely accurate, but I tried to tie it in as best as possible with juvie and other characters. as for being kept in juvie over 17, i researched it and someone can be kept in juvie until they are 18/19, but if they break the law when they are over 18, they will not go to juvie. I don't know if I'm explaining it well, but here's a quote 'Someone is a juvenile in the criminal justice system if they broke or attempted to break any Illinois law before they turned 18 years old. '

I found about it.

So I don't know, maybe you're right, I definitely didn't rewatch the whole of shameless and analyse every scene so it was fully accurate, I very well could be wrong.

thanks for sending an ask about it :)

[azsazz]

Azsazz’s Top 22 of 2022

I could say that I meant to post this on the first day of the new year but honestly I just thought about it yesterday so I’m doing it now.

I started this blog in February of 2022 and wow have we come a long way! Such an incredible year and thank you for each and every single one of you who have liked, followed, commented, reblogged, or supported me in any way, even if you’re a silent reader idc just the thought of all of you out there warms my heart immensely. 💙💙💙

So, I thought I would post the top 22 fics that I wrote this year that you all loved, #1 having the most notes to date. 🥰

But before we head into the countdown, I wanted to share a few other stats with you all 💙

- My first post was on Februrary 11th, so Azsazz will officially be 1 year old soon! 😳 Oh how times flies.

- I’ve gained 2,821 followers and counting...you guys are insane ilysm 💙

- I’ve posted 120 fics this year (not including part 2′s 🤭). Insane. I didn’t know I had it in me but you’ve all gotten me here. Thank you.

Okay, now to the fun part!! Azsazz’s Top 22 of 2022:

22. Looking Back (Azriel x Reader) [Fluff]

21. One More (Azriel x Reader) [Fluff, Smut]

20. Come Back (Azriel x Reader) [Daddy!Az, Frustration]

19. Family Dynamic (Azriel x Reader) [Daddy!Az, Fluff]

18. The Games We Play (Azriel x Reader) [Fight, Resolved]

17. Reading Between the Lines (Azriel x Reader) [Fluff]

16. Cocoon (Azriel x Reader) [Fluff]

15. Walk Away (Azriel x Reader) [Angst, Breakup, Resolved] (Part 2)

14. Not Me (Azriel x Reader) [Angst]

13. Fire & Water (Eris x Reader) [Archeron Sister!Reader, Enemies to Lovers] (Part 2)

12. Cupid’s Chokehold (Azriel x Reader) [Enemies to Lovers] (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7)

11. Haunt (Azriel x Reader) [Angst]

10. Quisling (Azriel x Reader) [Angst] (Part 2)

9. Alpha Save Me (Azriel x Reader) [Smut, A/B/O Dynamics]

8. You Too (Azriel x Reader) [Daddy!Az, Daddy!Rhys, Daddy!Cass, Angst]

7. Rough Terrain (Azriel x Reader) [Enemies to Lovers, Angst, Smut] (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)

6. Ringside (Azriel x Reader) [Fluff] (Part 2)

5. Flame and Ash (Azriel x Reader) [Archeron Sister!Reader, Smut]

4. Pack Mentality (Azriel x Cassian x Rhysand x Reader) [Smut, A/B/O Dynamics]

3. Just Hold On (Azriel x Reader) [Angst]

2. Intertwine (Azriel x Reader) [Smut]

1. Leisurely (Azriel x Reader) [Fluff]

And here’s my fav fic I wrote for each boy this year (not on the list above), just because I can 💙

Azsazz’s Fav Fics 2022:

(Lucien x Reader) The Other Woman [Angst]

(Eris x Reader) You Always Know I Liked Playing with Fire [Smut, TW: Slight Masochism, Slight Sadism]

(Rhysand x Reader) Clandestine Love [Young!Rhys, Pining, Fluff]

(Cassian x Reader) You Should Probably Leave [Smut, Sub!Cassian]

(Azriel x Reader) Truth-Teller & Soul-Stealer [Angst]

P.S. If you’ve read this far tysm 💙 Also P.P.S. If you’re a writer and want to add your fav/best fics of 2022 (even if you don’t have 22 please do!! I’d love to read them or reread them 🥰)! If you’re not a writer, feel free to tag writers if you want!

[koishua]

koishua's miscellaneous wip list!

say boo and pressure me into finishing these numbers <3

listed: 24/80 proper wips. had to sift through 250 drafts and veto most of them bc honestly we all know they weren't going to see the light of day!! have a suzu icon representing me rn <3 gonna be giving the other wips to the mooties who sent in for the ask game i created ages ago

№1 ) love till the sun sets | heeseung est. 15k

№2 ) from under the magnolia tree | beomgyu est. 10k — on february fourteenth, exactly five years ago, he’d gifted you a small magnolia tree he’d named after you. he’d said that he would love you for as long as the sapling you’d planted together would live. he’d even said that he would watch as it grew bigger and older with both of you taking care of it. he'd said that it would be the most beautiful thing in town. you'd believed him.

№3 ) we were beautiful | sunghoon est. 5k — you were fifteen when you’d first fallen in love with your childhood friend, seventeen when you’d called him your boyfriend, and eighteen when you lost him to life. broken apart by circumstances and necessity, everything you’d built up with him had fallen apart overnight. by the time the dawn of your nineteenth birthday had arrived, you’d no longer have the name park sunghoon present in your everyday life, only contained dearly in your memories and a journal, his name scribbled mindlessly on each and every corner of the aged pages.

№4 ) dear cupid | jake est. 15k — desperate to have his feelings of two years reciprocated, he finds a leather-bound book falling by his feet in the old campus library containing a guide on how to summon the very real and very quirky god of love and desire, cupid. in his next life, jake would come to write a book on why you should read holy contracts thoroughly before signing your name off in blood.

№5 ) man up | heeseung short fic

№6 ) ikigai | niki est 10k — lonely and trying to cope with the deeply settled rage at the world, reader stumbles upon a peculiar boy in the middle of a bridge and falls into a conversation with him where she utters eight damning words. the world consequently stops spinning and the univers halts as it is. time comes to a stand still and the only two ppl able to move happen to be her and the boy beside her. cue the next seven days of adventures in the dark streets, lit only by the streetlamps in the outskirts of tokyo.

№7 ) pocket locket | m. jaehyun short fic

№8 ) foreign exchange student!beomgyu drabble

№9 ) death is for those who stay | heeseung short fic

№10 ) the world and all her pearls | ??

№11 ) do yourself a flavour | ?? — ice cream parlour, r2l

№12 ) i blinked and suddenly i had a valentine | ??

№13 ) enha dates gone awry (in the best ways!)

№14 ) take you out | sunghoon assassin au short fic

№15 ) a conversation between the lost and unloved | yeonjun est 3k

№16 ) mothers and fathers | yeonjun est 5k — a conversation about hungry mothers and forgetful fathers with yeonjun, an unlikely friend from a country you've never been to.

№17 ) signs that enha are dating

№18 ) "why did you give me wings and want me to fall?" | ?? — hunger games-esque!au

№19 ) notes unread | sunghoon — letters you'd written for each other, unsent and unread.

№20 ) enha and your cute little secrets

№21 ) everything sucks, just kidding! | yeonjun short fic

№22 ) do not touch | jay est 5k — bnha!au, living with a quirk damning you to eternal loneliness, not being able to touch or be touched in fear of the other's demise, jay loves you from afar. he loves you without a single touch.

№23 ) i could drown myself in someone like you | gaon short fic

№24 ) dude, go to therapy | beomgyu text fic — your number neighbor just so happens to be choi beomgyu, your old nemesis from high school. it's too late when you find out about it, though, because you'd already dumped all of your emotional baggage on him. worst of all, he seemed to be concerned and not at all like the beomgyu of the past.

[midnightswithdearkatytspb]

MidnightsWithDearKatyTSPB’s Recommendations '23: January

Welcome back to monthly to semi weekly fanfiction and more list recommendations. It used to be VelvetCardiganBucky’s list, but I changed my name. New Year, going through residential treatment soon, new me, new name. A lot of new here at this blog. I follow my username in hashtag form, so tag me in your fics, challenges, to be added in future list. Do not be afraid to message me I will answer back as soon as I possibly can! — Katy K.

This blog and its content is attended for mature audiences, so unless you are over the age of 18, it’s best you turn back now. I’m not in charge of your media consumption there, for you cannot come for me when you don’t like something you read. Thank you.

<< April '21

February '23 >>

My Masterlist

One-Shots:

Start A War by @angrythingstarlight >> Mob!Bucky Barnes x Reader x Mob!Steve Rogers - Summary/Request: Another take on what could have been if the reader had decided to stay with Steve, not Bucky, in Pretty Little Liars story. | I always love reading anything written by angrythingstarlight, whether it's on here or it's on AO3. I have yet to read Pretty Little Liars, but this snippet has made me add it to my to-read list.

Looks Better On You by @navybrat817 >> Lumberjack! Stever Rogers x Reader - Steve can't stop thinking about how good you look in his shirts. | You got yourself the perfect amount of alluded smut, and you got yourself the lovey-dovey stuff. It's perfect, just perfect.

Could've Just Asked, Baby by @wndalovebot >> CEO Alpha!Bucky Barnes x Omega!Reader - Summary: All you wanted was, was some time with your CEO mate Bucky, but he seemed to busy for you lately. Well maybe calling attention to yourself was the best thing you ever did. | Did the room suddenly get 10 degrees hotter?

Still into You by @loverwebs >> Peter Parker x Scarlet Witch!Reader - Summary: You and Peter didn’t end things on the best terms and wind up seeing each other again at an Avengers party. | This is what I can picture as a realistic relationship with a fight between a super couple. The ending is *chefs kiss.*

Series:

The Happy Couple: Chapter 6 by @darkficsyouneveraskedfor >> Mob!Bucky Barnes x Reader - Summary: Your father makes a deal to marry you to his top capo. (mob au) | The story just really picked up, but you can't really ever go wrong with reading one of Roo's stories. They are just so good.

AO3:

In The Mood by SkylarJames22//@skylarjameswrites >> Mob!Bucky Barnes x Shelby!Reader - Mob Boss doesn't take too kindly to the beautiful Skylar trying to take over his territory in America. He comes to her to make a deal and get her to back off, but a Peaky Blinder never backs down from a fight. | HOT! HOT! HOT!

And They Were Roommates by staygold483 >> Tattoo Artist!Bucky Barnes x OFC - Summary: Luka has just finished her college degree and moved back to her hometown to live with her boyfriend. She runs into some of her old high school classmates, who support her when she really needs them. One of those people, is her high school crush, Bucky Barnes. | I read this story after it was completed and loved it, the ending is okay, but the story it's self is what holds it for me.

One-Shots:

Sweet Nothings by @secretswiftymarvelfan >> Chris Evans x Reader - Summary: When the world is out there pushing and shoving, all you’ve ever wanted was sweet nothings. | I'm pretty sure I have to go make a dentist appointment with Robert Evans, that's how sweet this is, and I love it.

Jealousy's My Best Friend by @cockslutpadalecki >> Professor!Andy Barber x Student!Reader - Summary: You can’t help but be a little jealous when Andy pays another student some attention. | Oh, don't act like you wouldn't be jealous if someone gave Andy extra attention. I know I would be.

Trust by @worksby-d >> Chris Evans x fem!Reader - Summary: Your second first time together. | (Read Warining, then proceed if interested.) I found this one-shot to be adorable, as well as sweet in how caring Chris was. I would definitely come back to read again on my sad days.

Housewife Duties by @lilacevans >> Ari Levinson x (non-descriptive) Female!Reader - After Ari's been gone on a long grueling work trip, you want to do whatever you can to make him feel comfortable. | I need to start my Thursday mornings, or any morning in general, honestly, reading stuff like this. It would put me in a better mood.

One-Shots:

Closer to Me by @kiki0005 >> Tommy Shelby x Reader - Summary: After you get pregnant with Tommy's child, he is adamant that you move in with him. | If I'm honest, I would let Tommy Shelby tell me what to do any day. So this one-shot of him was up my alley because he's asking and telling. Definitely worth the read.

*I'm Yours by @sunsetbeachesandwriting >> Tommy Shelby x Reader ft. John Shelby - Summary: Your body is for Tommy and Tommy alone. | I'm a fan of possessive Tommy Shelby, and I didn't know it till I read this, or I just forgot. So good.

Dada Tommy by @quinnsbower >> Tommy Shelby x Reader - Summary: Tommy is left to watch over his 6-month-old while his wife eats with his sister. What could possibly happen? | This was so adorable, funny, and just plain loving. I love Dad!Tommy, especially to baby girls. Makes my heart go pitter-patter.

The Clap by SunsetBeachesandWriting >> Tommy Shelby x Reader - Summary: Jealousy never looked so good on someone like Tommy Shelby, especially when all he wants is you back. | If a man ever did this to me, I would slap them. If Tommy Shelby ever did this to me, I would swoon.

Promotion by @sunsetbeachesandwriting >> Tommy Shelby x Reader - Summary: Y/N is Harry's daughter and works in the Garrison until Tommy decides to "fire" her. | This is both a mix of hot and sweet. I could picture season one or two of Tommy doing this with a massive smile on my face.

Love Is Sweeter Than Vengeance by @pherelesytsia >> Tommy Shelby x Reader - Summary: Burglars break into the mansion in search of the safe and stumble upon the lady of the house. | This was so suspenseful as well as hot. Just how I like my Tommy Shelby.

You're Everywhere, Love by @sunsetbeachesandwriting >> Tommy Shelby x Reader - Summary: Everyone has Tommy feeling overwhelmed. He walks out in the middle of a family meeting and goes to the one place he knows he'll find some peace. | I'm definitely not crying, and I'm definitely not going to suggest you have a box of tissues on standby when you read this.

Series:

The Boy in the Window by @notyour-valentine>> Tommy Shelby x Reader - Summary: (Y/N) thinks the boy her daughter sees in the window of the neighbouring house is nothing but a childish fantasy; after all, no one has lived there for years, but when she brings that boy to lunch, she realizes that he is in fact very real and above all- the son of none other than the infamous Tommy Shelby. | While I'm only five chapters into this story, it's quickly becoming one of my favorites that I've read. We get to see more of Charlie and more of Tommy's sensitive and protective side.

AO3:

*Tommy's Red Right Hand by HisRedRightHand >> Tommy Shelby x OFC - Summary: As if being left in charge of the two youngest Shelby siblings wasn't enough, Tommy decides to ask a redhead as ornery as he is and her six-year-old sister to take up residence at 6 Watery Lane. | At 115 chapters so far, I took my time to cherish this story because that is how much I thoroughly enjoy reading this. I highly recommend that you head the warnings that come in the tags in the summary that come with this before you dive in. The author does a fantastic job warning you about each chapter as well.

One-Shots:

A Flower Petal by @jelsasnowflakes1 >> Geralt x Fem!Reader - Summary: When being teased for still being a virgin at Kaer Morhen, geralt comes in and "comforts you" when he sees you crying. | It's fluffy and smutty, but it's the ending for me in the end.

Sleepless by @sgt-seabass >> MobBoss! PrimeAlpha!Nick Fowler x Omega!Reader- Summary: Nick wants all of you. And he will do whatever it takes to claim your soul. | Nick knows what he wants. This is sweet because he knows he will have to make an effort to change how he acts around her.

Series:

Happatance Pt. 6 by @teds-mustache-wrangler >> Henry Cavill x OFC - Summary: Henry is about to go to bed one night when he suddenly gets a text from a random number he doesn't know. What happens when you accidentally text the star actor of The Witcher? Memes apparently. Lots and lots of memes. | I was privileged to beta-read this chapter for Wren and am honored. This is a spicy one y'all so sit back and enjoy some Henry and Lizzy!

AO3:

*A Twist In Time by Comet96 >> Tommy Shelby x Lupin!OFC - Summary: Romy Lupin was a walking cliche. She has her father's metamorphmagus abilities and also seems to be a seer. During her last year at Hogwarts, Tom Riddle is brought from his teenage years at Hogwarts into the year 2047, and soon after, Romy finds herself being sent back into time. Back to 1926, when Merope Gaunt was still pregnant. It's Romy's job to protect Tom Riddle Jr. from being taken into the wrong hands. It was all going to plan until Merope knocked the time turner, and they ended up in 1916, in the middle of the first world war and with no way to get back to 1926. There she meets the Shelbys and somehow manages to find her feet in dingy Small Heath with the help of Harry Fenton, Squib, and a distant family member. | At 43 chapters and hasn't been updated since the middle of September, this story is Harry Potter, pre-Fantastic Beast meets Peaky Blinders, and I'm living for it. It has everything magical-wise you could ask for and Shelby-wise as well. I just wish it would be updated, but dreamers can dream.

Legacy by cl410 or @i-like-plan-m >> Darcy Lewis x Bucky Barnes - Summary: Darcy Lewis meets the Hales from Teen Wolf. (My poor summary.) | I love Stiles from Teen Wolf, and I love this What If twist that the author has done with Darcy. The whole series is good, and I recommend everyone give it a read if you are a fan of Darcy Lewis or MCU and Teen Wolf.

Blue by galaxiejoon >> Louis Tomlinson & OFC >> Summary: Elle is a seven-year-old girl who meets Louis and asks him to describe the color blue to her. | This is adorable and made me tear up the first time I read it in years. I still tear up every time I read it.

@peakyscillian - Looking for a masterlist to binge or just a variety of Tommy and Cillian? I would check out Laura's page and her writing.

@teds-mustache-wrangler - Are your Henry Cavill needs not getting met? Do you feel like perhaps you need to read about Henry Cavill, but haven't yet? Well go on down to Wren's blog, she has all your Henry Cavill needs met.

@gypsy-girl-08 - If you are a fan of Cillian Murphy or Peaky Blinders, then I would check this writer out. They have many Thomas Shelby series to choose from as well as Cillian Murphy

[noa-ciharu]

Stuff like this always make me laugh. Because at the end of the day:

Just what is "problematic ship"?

Now, on one side you have clearly messed up ships that involve incest, age gaps where one is a minor, grooming, any type of abuse, kidnapping etc. etc. - we all agree those are aspects that make ship "problematic"

But then, is ship between 20 and 30 year olds problematic? What if they've known each other for years but only started dating when younger one was 20? How about 25 and 45 year olds? How do I know someone with "dni if you ship problematic stuff" in bio won't bother me for something like that? How about 16 and 19? My best friend had that age gap with her bf back in the day, they're still together and one of healthiest couples I even had luck of knowing. And yet there are people online who adamantly insist such age gap make relationship inherently abusive cuz power imbalance induced by age difference. And yet I've seen a relationship between 15 and 18 year old where 18 year old guy had to escape from this possessive jealous irrational 15yo girl

What about all the action TV series or animes where characters are on opposite sides and tried to kill one another? Enemies to lovers trope? Or if just one side attempted to murder or harm other? That's still abuse right? Or if A murdered B's family member? Would you call shipper an apologist? Or if one of characters is a bigot? Is any fan automatically a bigot? What if two characters didn't have abusive relationships but mistreated someone else? What if they had a bad fallout and one character psychologically suffered because of indirect actions of another? Where is the line what amount of 'abuse' is tolerable in a ship?

What about those fandom made found family tropes where 'son' is 21 and 'mom' 29, do we get called pedos for shipping two adults that ain't even related but fandom views them as such? How about shipping characters that appear to be asexual or aromantic in canon? Do ace shippers get called aphobic for that? How about two characters that were shipped for years but only at the ending of the series author reveals they're related? Should we stop shipping them, delete all fics and arts of them? Or when both characters are 16 and there's fanart or fanfic of them doing something other than holding hands and kissing lightly (since y'know, kids those ages do experiment with each other irl)? Do we throw half of every shonen fandom for daring to ship underage characters? What about immortal characters? Who are they 'allowed' to get shipped with? Or if characters ages are never mentioned so we don't really know if they're around 17 or 23?

I could go on and on but naming every possible scenario isn't the point. Point is that for almost every ship in media that isn't made for small kids and isn't bland af there will be something "problematic" about the ship if you're persistent to dig deep enough. How do I know if you will? When I see "if you ship problematic ships dni" even if I don't have any ships that fit first category of ships I mentioned, I still don't know if you'd view one of "normal" ships I have as "problematic" because of xyz and attack me for that

[impossibleprincess35]

[20 Question Fic Writer Tag]

Hey, I got tagged twice. Thanks @yourfavoritefridge and @miserableandmagical94! <3

How many works do you have on AO3? Only nine, ten tomorrow, but I feel like I'm a n00b as I just got back into writing fic this past spring.

What is your AO3 word count? 376,550

What fandoms do you write for? Mainly Star Wars. I'm kind of obsessed at the moment. Like, I've gone down the SW rabbit hole and I kinda love it here.

What are your top five fics by kudos? Asphodel: 168 The Echo and the Stain: 50 Peace: 42 Hard Candy: 25 La Cantina de Bloomita: 21

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? I totally do. I cherish every kudos, every bookmark, every subscription, and every comment on my stories, because no one is obligated to interact at all. The fact that people take the time to do it? I want you to know I see you and I appreciate you. You could be doing a billion other things with your spare time, but you chose to read my new chapter? and then you took the time to tell me what you thought?! I adore you.

What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? In Vain. Obi-Wan goes to Kalevala in search of something to feel close to Satine in the wake of Order 66. I remember writing it and being like, "Well, this is fucking depressing."

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Peace. Satine gives birth to Korkie with Obi-Wan right there with her, and it's just fluff and love and newborn baby sweetness.

Do you get hate on fics? Occasionally, I get some kind of comment that implies that I have grossly misunderstood the Obi-Wan/Satine characters, and I just shrug it off. Some people don't like my version of their year on the run because they're annoying eighteen year olds, and I suppose all of us were our best selves at 18? And some of the feedback I've heard on Asphodel makes it sound like I've turned Satine into a Space Thot or something, like she's DTF with everyone in the galaxy. For the most part, though, the feedback I've gotten is amazing, so I keep doing what I'm doing.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yes, I dabble in the smut. In Asphodel, it's very much a romantic thing. There's occasionally a little bit of gratuitous smut, but I'd say 95% of the time, the smut scenes are pivotal to the story and give you more insight into their characters and how emotionally tied to one another they are. Maybe I could illustrate those emotional ties through dangerous experiences, but that's what I'm doing in my year on the run story, so.. romantic sex it is. ;)

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? I haven't attempted this yet. I feel like my brain would explode if I tried a crossover.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? No, and I fear this ever happening. I'm mean and vindictive. My Aries moon is a bitch.

Have you ever had a fic translated? No, but this would be so cool. What a huge compliment, right?

Have you ever cowritten a fic before? Nope, haven't done this yet, but I'd be open to it in the future.

What's your all-time favorite ship? It's a tie between Steggy (MCU) and Obitine (SW). I'll just admit this right here and right now, at the end of Endgame, I sobbed. For two hours. TWO HOURS. My husband has video of me in the car leaving the theater and I'm crying like a crazy person because Steggy got their happy ending. I was so deep into that "doomed by the narrative" ship that I never thought it would happen, so when it did, I basically lost my mind and embarrassed myself in front of all our friends. But I own it. I will love them forever. I'm almost as crazy over Obitine.

What's a WIP you'd like to finish but doubt you ever will? Shhh, don't say that. I'm finishing them all.

What are your writing strengths? I'm really not sure. I mean, I like my writing. I like my stories. I write for me, so it's all good. Someone wanna tell me what my strengths are? Maybe it's the details. I think I'm detail oriented.

What are your writing weaknesses? I'm long winded. If I could cut my chapters back to 3K words a piece, I think my stories would hit a wider audience and I would probably sleep better at night, but c'est la vie.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? Never say never, but it's unlikely. For me to sit and try to figure out the linguistics of Mando'a alone, look, I'm old. I got 2 kids. I'm a class mom. I have a job. I have a caffeine dependency. I have migraines. I'll leave that to the pros. I'm just over here fucking around trying to let Obi-Wan and Satine have a few orgasms and some romance before the galaxy goes to shit around them, y'know?

First fandom you wrote for? Ever?! I used to write Hanson fics when I was in middle school with an Angelcities website, and I was in a little online club called Hanson Hoes. "Do not cite the deep magic to me, witch. I was there when it was written." (Aside from that, definitely SW.)

Favorite fic you've ever written? It's gonna be Asphodel. It's my baby. I love it so much and I'm so proud of it.

Now, for who to tag.. here we go! @jelly-opal and @scottysketches! (If you've already done this, please disregard. My bad.)

[shamera]

20 questions for fic writers

Tagged by @bbcphile 🥰🥰🥰

1. How many works do you have on AO3? site says 21! (I also have 50+ on ff.net from when I was younger, and uhhh idk how many that I shoved into my dreamwidth/livejournal never to see the light of day again.)

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 619,848

3. What fandoms do you write for? Currently Mysterious Lotus Casebook! (Although I might sneak something for Love and Redemption or Scum Villain.) I am mostly a writer in the Final Fantasy XIII fandom, although I have spent years in Code Geass and Merlin fandoms. Before that, it was Fullmetal Alchemist, Naruto, Harry Potter, and Star Wars.... loads more.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Leave Me Your Starlight, Code Geass fic Nunnally-centric time-travel fix-it

Five Minutes, FFXIII fluff oneshot featuring Noel and Hope

World Enough and Time, Code Geass AU post-apocalyptic rewrite

First (and Second) Impressions, FFXIII modern babysitting AU Noel/Hope

Lost in a Moment (lost in a song), Mysterious Lotus Casebook post-canon fix-it casefic

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? I try to! I'm, um. I'm really bad at it. In that I will attempt to respond to everyone in the first few days, but then I get distracted doing/writing something else and I am so tunnel-visioned that you won't hear from me until a week later and then I feel bad about taking so long to respond. Also I am very, very bad at responding because while I love love love seeing comments, it's just happy reactions and incoherent noises from me. How do I words to translate my appreciation???

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? ...probably everything I wrote as a kid? I have very different ideas on angst nowadays, but I guess while I was writing it... between Gedächtnisse (FMA fic) and Sound of Silence (HP fic), I guess!

Newer stuff might be between The Other (FFXIII fic) and Test Subjects (FFXIII fic).

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? I write a lot of fluff pieces nowadays! But overall, probably Something About December (FFXIII fic), since it's a Christmas fic or Family (FFXIII), which was written to give Sazh more support in the third game.

8. Do you get hate on fics? Once, someone pointed out my join date on the website and asked me why I was still writing fanfiction.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I have, but generally don't. Even most of my ships are closer to gen than not. I'm closer to the repulsed spectrum of ace, but I do like attempting to write all sorts of things.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? Yes! Love them! I've written a good handful-- but the craziest one was when I was... 10? 11? and I wrote Orions'Ka on a notebook and when I typed it up, it was well over 60,000 words. It had absolutely everything I loved back then.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not by a person, no. By website bots, yes.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? I have had... people ask me if they could translate my fics? My answer is always yes, but I don't recall seeing it anywhere.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? I had an entire online journal with my best friend back in middle school.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship? ...MXTX ships, maybe? I don't feel particularly strongly about ships most of the time, only about characters, who I will ship around for the fun of it. But for MXTX pairings, that just doesn't feel right. They just belong together.

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? ....my old Harry Potter stuff, I'm sorry. Not a fandom I got back into again.

16. What are your writing strengths? I've been told it's characterizations! And descriptions.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Everything else. Confidence, I guess. Also energy and interest. And once I overcome those, plot.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? ...me, or fics that do that? Because I've seen fics do that, full on paragraphs of dialogue in the original language but descriptions in English, and I don't understand. But if it's just... an important word, a statement, something the fandom would normally understand kept in its original language because there's just no good translation in English for it, then it absolutely works. Some things don't translate well, and fans usually like learning more about their canons. I personally try to keep things mostly in English nowadays, though, but I slip time to time.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Star Wars. I was in the single digits age, and wrote an introspective ficlet on Luke and Leia's feelings about how the original trilogy's ending, sitting together on Endor to watch it all burn.

20. Favorite fic you've written? ...I don't know if I have one. I either tend to be proud or hate what I've written, depending on the day, my mood, wind speeds, and cats. Currently I want to say Lost in a Moment, because I finished that recently and I had so many doubts about it so I'm proud I got through it.

Tagging... omg, anyone who still follows me all the way from FFXIII days and writes, or all the way from the Gundam Wing days gosh.

but also @seventhstrife, @rhystheceo, @teekettle, @adriannasharp @tunnelofdusk 🤭 ya'll suffer through my random selection because I know you guys are writerssss

[hisaacswrites]

Bake Room in Your Heart for Me? Chapter 1

【 Fandom: Call of Duty 【 Main Pairing: Simon "Ghost" Riley x John "Soap" MacTavish 【 Rating: M for Mature 【 Trigger Warnings: -

Summary:

When Simon first interviewed for The Great British Baking Show, he hadn’t expected anything to come of it. He certainly didn't expect to win. Despite the chaos it brought to his life, he couldn't really complain. It landed him the best job he could ask for and a close circle of friends who actually seemed to enjoy his company. It also led him to his biggest fan, one John MacTavish, who's determined to win him over one baked good at a time.---Or, The baking AU that no one asked for.

Chapter 1 ⦿ 【 Chapter 2 →

☆ Read on AO3

【 Chapter Specific Warnings: - 【 Notes: It's been literal years since I've written anything but this fandom has me by the throat. Do I have a 21 chapter Ghoap fic outlined? Yes. Did I choose to start something completely different instead of working on that? Also yes. Flying by the seat of my pants on this one; don't have anything outlined or otherwise planned as of now! Don't think this will be too terribly long though. Maybe 10 chapters max? We'll see. Tags will probably be added to as things progress!

Bake Room in Your Heart for Me? Masterlist ⦿ CoD Library ⦿ Hayden Isaacs Library

🍰 Chapter 1

When Simon first interviewed for The Great British Baking Show, he hadn’t expected anything to come of it.

He had started baking after getting medically discharged from the military, a catastrophic mission causing irreparable nerve damage in his arm. His first few months of living as a civilian were difficult and Simon had struggled to acclimate. The army had been his sole purpose since he enlisted at 18 and after nearly two decades of service, he was left adrift. It was his therapist that recommended baking. He had fond memories of his mother’s baking, one of the few highlights of his childhood, so it would be a great way to "reconnect with himself, " or whatever that meant. It was also something to keep his mind and hands busy; baking required its own sort of discipline that soothed the soldier in him. His physical therapist also approved, saying that the physical labor of it all would be great for his recovery.

Regardless of the reasoning, Simon quickly found that he actually enjoyed baking. He had started with simple things from some of his mother’s old recipe books he had saved after she passed, gaining confidence until he began trying to recreate her homemade recipes from his childhood. He found himself with a surplus of baked goods and there was no way he’d be able to eat it all, so Simon just… gave them away. To his neighbors, to the postman , to his local soup kitchen, and even to his old captain, John Price, who had retired a few years before him and insisted on visiting monthly.

When Price had almost waxed poetic about his fruit tarts (Price loved strawberries and Simon thought that the lemon curd would be suitably refreshing for the hot summer day, he wasn't trying to show off , okay — ) Simon had felt his face flush in embarrassment and he had shoved a freshly baked custard cream biscuit into Price's mouth to shut him up. He wasn't surprised when Price demanded he bake something for not just their visits, but also for him to take back home and "tide him over" until his next visit. Never mind the fact that Price owned his own cafe and had access to his own baked goods ("Stop being modest, Simon! Your biscuits blast Shepherd's out of the water, I can't believe I had to keep him on when I bought the place, he's so stuck in his ways, you know, and he's costing me customers! I can't wait until his contract is up and I can actually hire a real baker and not some crusty-").

Price had always been kind to him, though, ever since they met when Simon was 20 and freshly traumatized from a failed op in Mexico, so he paid little mind to the extravagant compliments. He laughed when Price kept offering him Shepherd's head baker position at Cafe 141, knowing that Price was just teasing him. And he snorted when Price had suggested he apply to The Great British Baking Show, appreciating that Price was just trying to increase his confidence in his baking.

Apparently, Price had been serious and wasn't just trying to make him feel better.

When Simon had gotten an email about scheduling a phone interview, Price had confessed to filling out the online questionnaire application in Simon's name. Simon had gone through with the phone interview, assuming that his blunt and gruff responses would eliminate him from the pool of possible contestants. When he was contacted again to schedule an off-camera series of bakes to judge his knowledge, he assumed that it would become clear he was an absolute novice and therefore not a good contender. When he made it to the next round and was asked to do a screen test, he figured that his awkwardness would only be amplified on camera and that would be the end of that. He did not expect to hear that his awkwardness came off as endearing, of all things, and that he just had to pass a psychological screening. Simon knew that would be the end of it all — he was many things, but psychologically sound was not one of them. It seemed like his military service had prepared him a bit too well, though, as he was deemed more than capable to handle the stress of the show.

Simon had been with Price when he received confirmation that he'd b the end of th that would bee on the show. He had frozen in shock while Price had whooped and hollered, clapping him strongly on the back and declaring to the patrons of it all — he was many things, but psychologically sound was not othe next winner of sThe Great British Baking Show.

Simon expected to be kicked off the first week of the show. He didn't expect to stay, week after week. He didn't expect to win Star Baker three times. He didn't expect to become one of the fan favorites. He didn't expect to make it to the final, facing off against a pretentious expat Texan named Graves and a selectively mute but insanely skilled man named Gary. He certainly didn't expect to win .

Over the course of a year, he went from a ghost of a man whose contributions to society were lost to a blacked-out file, a no-one in a black medical mask, to a much-beloved television personality whose face almost everyone knew. The change was overwhelming.

He couldn't even pick up his groceries in peace. Simon was one more "Can we please get a photograph with you?" away from packing up his flat and hiding away in the countryside for the rest of his days as a baking hermit when Price had approached him once more. Simon nearly slammed the door in his face when he arrived at his home, blaming Price for his entire predicament and unwilling to be dragged into any more shenanigans. Instead, he was offered a job. Again.

Price had finally been able to get rid of Shepherd and was looking to hire a new baker for Cafe 141. Who better than one of his favorite soldiers, a great friend, and the year's winner of The Great British Baking Show? Simon was dubious about the offer but Price ran a hard bargain; Simon would be the head baker and therefore could boss around the two underlings to his heart's content , he could bake whatever he wanted as long as the cases were stocked, and he didn't have to interact with any customers. He could stay in the back and bake in blissful (somewhat) solitude while still being able to work on new recipes and bring home a decent paycheck.

So that's how Simon "Ghost" Riley found himself joining Price's motley crew of veterans at Cafe 141. And that's where he met his biggest fan, one John MacTavish.

[sangveram]

⚜ RP Information.

*) Vampire Knight and other media in this blog contains subjects some may find distressing. Please take caution when interacting.

🩸This blog may feature heavily NSFW/harmful text and imagery, among which include violence, gore, smut—alongside canon-typical violence.

— ⚜ 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐈𝐧𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐦𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧.

I’m Kaname Kuran. Call me whatever you like.

How old do you think I am?

I have many passions.

Pronouns…? I don’t much care for pronouns, though if you insist, you may use He/Him.

I decide who I love.

My job…? You’re laughing. You must think someone like me has never worked a day in his life. Well, if it pleases you to perceive me in such a manner, then I am very much unemployed.

Kaname Kuran is a character from the manga Vampire Knight & Vampire Knight Memories by Matsuri Hino. He is a Pureblood vampire—one of the progenitors of vampires, making him over ten thousand years in age. In my portrayal, he appears to be somewhere in his 20s or over, depending on the RP. If it's set in Cross Academy, he will be 18 appearance-wise by default unless discussed otherwise. My portrayal is based on the manga and anime with some personal headcanons.

— ⚜ 𝐑𝐏.

Mun is 21+

Literate.

Able to play multiple characters if required.

OC, AU, Crossover, Multi-ship friendly.

Likely canon-divergent.

Preferred genres: Mystery, Whump, Occult, Historical Fantasy, Crime, Supernatural, Angst, Fluff, Drama, Adventure, Modern, Romance, Crack—open to exploring new genres, but please don't expect too much.

Content: Aside from threads & IC asks, this blog features other content such as edits, fic/headcanons.

I do take fic requests, but they will take a bit more time to write.

Communication: I will let you know if I will not be able to respond to our RP soon. If anything makes you uncomfortable during RP, please inform me.

Speed: My reply speed varies; however, I am generally a slow writer. This is not a reflection of my interest in you and/or our RP.

That being said, if you are searching for a writing partner who does rapid-fire responses most of the time, I may not be the right one for you.

Interactions are always welcome.

— ⚜ 𝐑𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬.

No god-modding.

Please inform me if you would like to drop a thread.

Starting multiple threads is fine.

I will not RP smut with those under 18 (Mun & muse).

I am open to plotting.

Extreme violence is best discussed first.

OOC chat is welcome. Feel free to tag me in memes, songs, all that good stuff. I would like to do the same. As we will be writing together, it would be nice if we could learn a bit about each other along the way.

— ⚜ 𝐌𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐕𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞.

The Reawakened Progenitor of Vampires: Similar to canon, only Kaname has a phlegmatic-melancholic temperament and loathes himself a little less. He is also deeply interested in sciences and conducting experiments.