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thewebcomicsreview · 11 months ago

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Homestuck 2 updated early this month, and we're Yiffy now. It's a Valentine's Day miracle!

Yiffy was one of the most interesting characters in HS2, because literally everyone treated her like shit constantly. Jade's giving her daughter a smooch but also Jade sent her off to a boarding school explicitly because she was embarrassing to acknowledge and also Jade named her child Yiffy Longstocking on a joke and never bothered to change it. In the epilogues, Rose acknowledged that nothing in Candy was "real" and she was joining the rebellion basically for the luls, and one some level Jade and Rose don't think Yiffy is a real three-quarters-human person, and I think they think of her more like an OC in a game they like.

Well, that was my read of HS2, lets see how HSBC handles her.

Oh, this visual is great. Kanaya is so pissed off she's turning into the Ancestor art style in real time. She also kind of looks like Batman, here.

No doubt if your POSSE OF PUBESCENT PUNKS back at school could see you now they'd throw up laughing.

I am suddenly way more interested in Yiffy's gang than I am in half the HS1 cast. What kids join a gang led by a dog girl named Yiffy Longstocking?

Engineering that reprieve might be just about the only real solid your no-show non-mom has ever actually bothered to do for you.

Oh thank christ, there was a part of me worried that Yiffy wouldn't resent her parents for being the second-worst parents in HS2. This is the most interesting thing in the sequels, I think.

TAVVY: ,,, And also, everyone knows you exist now,,, instead of just me,,, TAVVY: And our moms

TAVVY: Wow,,,! YIFFY: TAVVY: You know, i was almost kidnapped,,, once,,, TAVVY: My mom removed the window, after that, TAVVY: Which, um, sucked, TAVVY: Though, i guess you'd know, uh, about that,,,

Oh, interesting. Tavvy knew about Yiffy this whole time? Actually, this and Yiffy's description of him via narration earlier imply they grew up together. I guess that makes sense, since he's Jane's kid and Jade inexplicably put Jane in charge of Yiffy, but he never told Vrissy about her secret sister? That's a bit fucked up, dude. Yiffy's not saying anything (and I hope she doesn't for a long time, until she has something meaningful to say), but her text color is Dave's red, even though she's not related to Dave. Or she is and HSBC is going to retcon HS2's most hated plot point somehow.

Pepis

Look at this ARRANT BEAVIS double fisting those cans of pop

"ARRANT BEAVIS" is a great Homestuckism

The Sylph has been slow boiling, you can tell.

Interesting that Yiffy refers to Kanaya as "The Sylph". I don't know what else she'd call her, I suppose, but Yiffy of all people being the one to mention Classpect is odd.

You've only been around this earth for 15 years, but it's a self-evident fact that there are no useful authorities. Gifted with unimaginable power, their concern only stretches so far as to manhandle those dependent on them, and tangles into ineffectual deadlock the instant it meets a challenge worth addressing. Potential killed for the sake of comfort. True kindness is real, but only for those that bare teeth and break skin. Why should these disingenuous, bystanding, spineless, SELFISH adults get anything they want?

Fuck yes, Yiffy hates all the HS1 characters. I've been hoping for this, she has more beef with them all than even Tavros, and it's a bit of Vriska energy this comic has needed that neither actually Vriska really provides.

Yiffy being the best thing about HS2 was maybe a hot take before, but hopefully it isn't now. She's great.

JADE: and of course you arent obligated to ever forgive me but... i dont want to lose you too! JADE: i love you kanaya JADE: youre my family KANAYA: You Fucked My Wife

This is the best update in the entire comic.

KANAYA: And Though That Travesty Of A Name Is Undoubtedly An Incomprehensibly Offensive Piece Of This Particular Puzzle KANAYA: What I See Is Not An Explanation KANAYA: But A Glossing Over Of The Worst Detail ROSE: Jane.

Yeah, HS2 kind of glossed over Rose/Jade putting TrumpHitler in charge of their literal child. I could copy/paste this whole conversation but basically Kanaya is pointing out that there's like fifty plot holes in Yiffy's backstory and it makes no fucking sense at all and are they going to retcon her to being Jade/Dave's ecto-kid?

ROSE: You've managed to exhume the solemn cadaver of my mother's memory and make her the star of another argument. KANAYA: As If You Ever Bothered To Bury Her ROSE: What does this have to do with anything!? KANAYA: What I Am Doing Is Demonstrating That I Have No Intention To Mediate This Situation KANAYA: Or Pacify It KANAYA: Or Even Be A Little Bit Nice Right Now KANAYA: So Perhaps Youll Actually Take Me Seriously For Once

This is the well-earned sass we've been waiting for since Yiffy's reveal.

ROSE: But more than anything else, I took her up on it because it felt oddly ROSE: inevitable. ROSE: Anyways, ROSE: Deep down, I knew it didn’t matter. ROSE: However we handled it. ROSE: Whatever hurt we caused. ROSE: It was never that serious.

Man, I'm glad that I'm live-blogging and put my read of the situation up as I went because I fucking called it. Yes! I am capable of retaining information when I read instead of staring at the screen slack-jawed.

ROSE: I knew you would forgive me. KANAYA: Rose KANAYA: When Did You Stop Trying JADE: yeah rose!!!!! JADE: what the fuck!!!!

Oh shit, Candy Rose is evil?

JADE: b-but i just dont want things to get even worse!!!!!! KANAYA: Then stop pretending that my feelings are top priority KANAYA: AND TRY BEING HONEST FOR ONCE JADE: WHAT DOES IT EVEN MATTER!!!!!!! KANAYA: Excuse Me? JADE: you heard me! JADE: you were wronged kanaya! JADE: the truth cant change that JADE: saying it just fucking hurts more JADE: what does that accomplish? JADE: its so embarrassing, would you even get it if i had?

JADE: you have no idea what its like out there JADE: how traumatizing dating regular citizens was JADE: imagine trying to love someone who already knows every available detail about you JADE: who has *opinions* on what happened to you as a child JADE: who assumes youre indestructible JADE: newsflash it fucking sucks!!!!!!! because no matter how nice they were JADE: they didnt want to know me JADE: they wanted to date the god of space

I have no notes, this is great and I'm thrilled everyone is mad now.

JADE: so everyone could lecture me again on how "bad" my "boundaries" are? ROSE: (I did that one time.) JADE: you want bad boundaries JADE: do you know how many people would be waiting outside public bathrooms to talk to me about their problems? JADE: this one guy randomly started apologizing because they cooked their hamster in the microwave! JADE: and they looked so sad... i had to hug them and say it was ok JADE: but it was not ok! JADE: they murdered their hamster! Rose: Ugh... JADE: and their other hamster killed itself KANAYA: JADE JADE: out of loneliness!!!!!

What the fuck, this is amazing.

The art here is great, by the way.

JADE: millions of people told me they loved me JADE: but i was never a real person to them JADE: i couldn't let that happen to yiffy too KANAYA: What JADE: i had to save her kanaya! JADE: give her the chance to grow up as a normal kid with a normal life

Jade she's half-dog and she's named Yiffy Fucking Longstocking, that ship has sailed. How are people not going to know she's your child?

Oh, okay. She wears a hat. Sure.

This art is so good!

KANAYA: Even If I Didnt Want Her KANAYA: She Was Already Here

*Makes a note in my "ominous foreshadowing lines journal*

What. Why does Jade have a Frankenstein in her inventory? What's that about?

And that was the update. Honestly? Banger, easily the best HSBC update yet. I could, and if I didn't have DnD in five minutes perhaps would (and perhaps still will!) write a whole essay on this. Phenomenal. A+

#Homestuck 2 #Homestuck 2 liveblog

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sleepyfan-blog · 5 months ago

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Religious Excerpts

Author's note: this is the first part of the Fem!Guilliman in 40k AU fic! I hope that you enjoy it! Next

tagged: @egrets-not-regrets @the-pure-angel @i-am-a-dragon34 @gallifreyianrosearkytiorsusan @bleedingichorhearts

warnings: religious writings, deification,

summary: A small collection of snippets from a collection of writings on the demi-goddess of the Imperium, Roberta Guilliman

She had asked for a brief synopsis of how she was most likely to be seen as, by different parts of the Imperium. She had sent out hundreds of intelligence gathers to move stealthily throughout the Imperium, including within Ultramar itself.

Her sons had been eager to follow her every order, the worshipful way in which they interacted with her bothered her tremendously. But she had been handed a dataslate that was a collection of poems, psalms, prayers, and fables written about The Lady Of Ultramar, the Daughter of the Emperor, Roberta Guilliman. If known, the date of creation and the author’s name has been noted down, though many such details have been lost to time.

Ballad of the Risen Primarch - written by Frater Matthew, Militant Apostolic, M42.076

The Lady with her sword aloft

Charges into the fray

To hunt down the vile traitors

And bring them true dismay

From deepest slumber, she arose

And she answered our prayers

While we were lost and desperate

Showing us that she cares

She scoured Chaos from Imperial Worlds

And chased them from our space

The Avenging Daughter protects us

From Chaos and disgrace

From deepest slumber, she arose

And she answered our prayers

While we were lost and desperate

Showing us that she cares

The xenos quail before her gaze

And fall before her might

Orkz, Aeldari, Tau, Tyranids

Failed to survive the fight

From deepest slumber, she arose

And she answered our prayers

While we were lost and desperate

Showing us that she cares

Her divine light shines so brightly

As does her wit and charm

She rules with a just and fair hand

She protects us from harm

From deepest slumber, she arose

And she answered our prayers

While we were lost and desperate

Showing us that she cares

She guards us from internal strife

Corruption, decay, lies

All are placed into cleansing flames

She is Evil's demise

From deepest slumber, she arose

And she answered our prayers

While we were lost and desperate

Showing us that she cares

This was written by Frater Matthew, the current Militant Apostolic working alongside Primarch Guilliman herself. He was inspired to write this poem after spending a number of months in her holy and robust presence.

She could feel a familiar headache starting to build in the back of her mind, and a low, frustrated growl threatened to rumble through her chest. She had picked Frater Matthew as he was an orator of some skill, and able to rally mortals and Astartes alike to his cause. But this... Travesty was annoying to read through.

Mother's Psalm - Author unknown. Suspected to have been written somewhere in the mid-M35s.

The sacred temple lies

The saintly Mother, who's eyes

Watch over her sons’ endless toil

At home and on foreign soil

The stasis field keeps her here

Away from the reaper's spear

Traitor's poison will not take

The fortress’ walls will not break

As Mother does, Maccrage stands

Protected by loving hands

And a sturdy wall of blue

Made of sons, loyal and true

One day, Mother will awake

With her, a new dawn shall break

She'll lead us out of shadows

And send evil to the gallows

This Psalm is found to be commonly sung by serfs of Ultramarines as well as their successor chapters, along with the civilian populations of Ultramar itself. The Psalm is also sung by the Auxilla of Ultramar, though they tend to prefer singing war songs in praise of The Avenging Daughter as she leads them to battle in Righteous fury against foul xenos and traitors alike.

A soft sigh left her as she finished reading the psalm. At least this was less overtly religious in tone, though the fact that this was marked as a psalm did not improve her mood in the least. She was starting to realize just how wide and deep the Adeptus Ministorum had a stranglehold on the Imperium of Man as a whole... This was going to be a misery and a half to slowly and carefully untangle... If she could.

Prayer for Information This prayer was written sometime in the early M37s, by a Historitor whose name has been expunged from all records by the Ordo Hereticus.

Oh great Lady of Insight and wisdom, Maiden Mother of fair Ultramar, I come to you, humbly, on bended knees and clasped hands.

To you, I confess that I have not been sending my daily morning prayers to Him on Terra as I should be. Instead, I have been researching what I can of the history of our Great Imperium. I know it is a sin to try and learn of the past beyond what is taught in school… But my curiosity pushes me onwards nonetheless. Surely this knowledge will not cause harm?

You have my deepest thanks. For I and many others upon the world of [REDACTED] owe you our lives. Because if your auxilla and Astartes had not come to our rescue against the [REDACTED] we would have all been killed and our souls consumed by the forces of [REDACTED].

I humbly ask you to grant me entry into the library within the Temple of Corrections, where I would be able to continue my research and studies. I feel that if properly understood, our past could teach us many things. I patiently await your response.

Your humble servant,

[REDACTED]

There was quite a bit of fierce debate as to whether or not to include this particular prayer to Lady Guilliman, as it has heretical elements in the prayer. Ultimately, this shows that even otherwise stalwart and obedient citizens can be heretical, and that one must always be vigilant.

... Since when was knowing the history of the Imperium illegal? Father damn them all. Those who did not learn from history were doomed to repeat it. She buried her face in her hands for a moment, unable to read on as she swore viciously in every tongue she knew. Considering what the Inquisition was like... She could guess that this poor Historitor's fate was a gruesome and miserable one indeed. She also hated that this letter had been phrased as an Emperor-damned prayer.

Psalm of praise - written shortly after Lady Guilliman’s interment into the stasis chamber, perhaps three hundred years past that event.

I will extoll the Lady at all times; her praise will always be on my lips. I will glory in HER; let all who hear rejoice. Glorify the Lady of Ultramar with me; let us exalt her name together. I sought the lady, and she answered me. She delivered me from all my woes.

This Psalm is frequently murmured by serfs and similarly ranked civilians who often work under Astartes. Particularly while the Astartes are preparing for a particularly vicious and bloody battle.

After reading the first psalm, she decided to skip the rest of the section, the blood boiling in her veins as the grip on the dataslate caused the device to creak in protest. She would rather not have to request a new one with this information on it, because she had broken this one in her fury.

A Lesson in Obedience- This fable was written sometime in the early M34s, and presented without the artwork to shrink the file size.

The world that The Soldier was going to be deployed to protect was one of hundreds if not thousands like it. A small yellow gem of a world with over ninety percent of the available aland devoted to growing a singular crop that fed the loyal and true citizens of the Imperium. It was this soldier’s first deployment, and excitement thrummed just below the surface of his skin as he walked over to where his mother was busily working.

His mother with her honey-blond hair and clever ice-blue eyes was carefully working at her desk a dataslate in one hand, a stylus in the other as she swiftly worked. She looked up and smiled warmly as her son walked over to her. She set down the dataslate and hugged him tightly, murmuring “Good morning, my wonderful son. How goes your training?”

“It goes very well! Mother, I have good news to share with you!” The eager, blue-clad young man explained, happily hugging his mother back as he beamed with joy.

“What news do you bring to me my son?” His mother asked, reaching up and ruffling his dark, curly hair with one hand, still hugging her precious son.

“Like my older siblings before me, I am benign deployed to fight foul xenos! I am being sent to fight Orkz who threaten one of the worlds that grow crops, mother.” The soldier explained, still beaming up at his mother “I will be the one to kill the most of the vicious brutes of my entire battalion! I will decapitate the Ork Warboss and rip his tusks from his mouth. I will carve them into combs for your hair, mother. As a trophy!”

A soft sigh left the Mother as she hugged her over-eager son, pressing her forehead to his, before looking into his dark eyes, hoping that her words reached his heart and resonated within his mind “I don’t need an ork-tooth comb my son. As with your older siblings, all I want is for you to serve our great Imperium with honor and grace. Fight and win the battles set before you, but do not seek glory for it’s own sake. Rushing to grab glory with your own hands will only get you killed first, my son.”

“That won’t happen, mother~ I am too strong and too swift for the Orkz to be able to kill me.” The young soldier protested, shaking his head a little “My armor is too sturdy for their shoddy and broken weapons to damage.” His armor was indeed well-polished. Shining a brilliant blue and bright gold.

“Orkz are -” The soldier’s mother tried to warn him, but the young man stepped out of her embrace as his vox began to buzz loudly.

“That’s The Captain, mother! I have been taught how to fight Orkz and other filthy xenos. I will come home victorious and with a chest full of accolades before you can start to miss me!” The young Soldier boasted as he ran out of his mother’s office, ready to take on any threats, big or small. “I must answer the call to war! Goodbye for now, mother!”

Years of training and months of waiting and sparring had led to this moment for the young Soldier as he stared over the incoming horde of Orkz. They were a disorganized tidal wave of hooting and hollering green, and he double checked his bolter before he started to level his weapon at them, taking in a breath and letting it out as he prepared to fire.

“Hold your fire.” The Captain ordered. “I need you four to help complete the evacuation of the civilians from this world.” He pointed to the young soldier and three of his fellow warriors.

“But… But sir, the Orkz are almost upon us! Shouldn’t we start to fire?” The young soldier asked, a confused expression appearing on his face.

“Are you questioning my orders, soldier?” The captain asked, his words underlined by the roar of artillery fire as they steadily flung shell after shell at the oncoming Orkish horde. “They are too far for you to hit reliably. Get going, soldier!”

The young soldier grumbled to himself as he dutifully got up and followed his squadmates over to the landing pads where several other groups of soldiers were -

She put down the dataslate, unable to force herself to continue to read the fable. She could guess as to where the story was heading, and the likely ways in which it would end. It was not worth the space it would occupy in her brain to continue to read through it. She hid her face in her hands and let out a low scream, trying not to alert the guards outside her office as to her distress.

There was a brief knock on the door before one of her brasher Captains barreled into the room, sword in hand as he did a visual sweep of the room. He didn't see any threats, so he removed his helmet and approached her, a look of mild concern on his face "I heard your yell, Mother. Is something bothering you?"

Roberta couldn't help but smile a little at his concern. Cato was rough around the edges and brash, but his boldness meant that he was the least anxious of her officer-sons to interact with her directly. "I was reading through the collection of legends that have sprung up about me, in my absence."

"Ah." Cato rumbled, briefly glancing at the dataslate on her desk, before looking back up at her "You are widely revered and held in great awe, as are all of the Holy Primarchs."

"Mm, but who we truly are has been lost to time. If Sanguinius found out how the masses - and perhaps his own sons believe him to be now..." Roberta sighed. The majority of the Imperium had come to believe that Sanguinius was a tragic, gentle-spoken martyr, whose death at the hands of the Vile Arch-Traitor was the final proof of the utter depravity that Horus had sank to. They seem to have forgotten, or been made to forget, from whom the Black Rage that afflicted most if not all sons of Sanguinius stemmed from. “His reaction would have been… Spectacular.” Throne on Terra, she missed her siblings.

Cato nodded, looking uncertain. “Is there anything you wish of me, mother?”

A small smile appeared on her face “Only your company, if your duties permit it. I am… Finding it difficult to adjust to this new time I have woken up in. Please tell me of the battles you’ve participated in.”

Cato’s eyes lit up as he begun to talk about his past exploits, gesturing occasionally for emphasis.

#cw religious writings #cw deification #my writing #cato sicarius #roberta guilliman

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reasoningdaily · 3 months ago

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Donald Trump’s notorious inability to acknowledge a mistake – even when everyone else can clearly see how wrong he is – will now probably cost him a big bundle of money in yet another court case.

It should cost him support from Black and Latino voters, too.

You may recall the names Antron Brown (formerly known as Antron McCray), Kevin Richardson, Yusef Salaam, Raymond Santana and Korey Wise by the undeserved moniker slapped on the Black and Latino teenagers 35 years ago ‒ "The Central Park Five." They now prefer to be known as the "Exonerated Five" since their convictions for a pair of attacks and a rape in 1989 were vacated in 2002.

They sued Trump in federal court in Philadelphia on Monday for defamation after he falsely claimed during a debate with Vice President Kamala Harris last month that they pleaded guilty after being charged and had killed someone. They pleaded not guilty and nobody died in the attacks that sparked the controversy.

New York acknowledged the travesty in the treatment of the five, who were ages 14-16 when they were arrested, by paying them $41 million to settle a lawsuit in 2014. In a statement, then-Mayor Bill de Blasio said: "The City had a moral obligation to right this injustice."

Trump could never muster the kind of character it takes to meet any notion of moral obligation. It is now and always has been far outside the range of his ego-driven, narcissistic personality.

Donald Trump can't stop accusing the Central Park Five of a crime

Trump, who used the 1989 Central Park attacks to draw attention to himself, ran full-page ads in New York newspapers in the weeks after with the banner headline, "BRING BACK THE DEATH PENALTY." Trump has a long history, laid out in the complaint filed Monday, of continuing to accuse the five men of criminal behavior even after they were exonerated.

Harris made that point during the Sept. 10 debate hosted by ABC News during a segment on "race and politics." her opponent, of course, turned defensive and then said a bunch of things that were not true.

"They admitted ‒ they said, they pled guilty. And I said, well, if they pled guilty they badly hurt a person, killed a person ultimately," Trump lied from the debate stage.

The complaint filed against him Monday notes that Trump has attacked a documentary about how the men were exonerated, which means he had the facts at his disposal and could have told the truth.

Opinion:In an unpredictable election, one thing is certain – Trump will lie about it

But this would require Trump to acknowledge he was wrong. He lacks the character for that.

Shanin Specter, a lawyer for the five men, said they didn't bother to give Trump a chance to apologize for what he said in the debate or issue a retraction because they knew, given his history since their exoneration, that "there was no chance of that happening."

"He has been single-minded about this for the last 35 years," Specter told me. "And he has not let the facts get in the way of his narrative."

Trump challenged to respond to lawsuit by lawyer who filed it

Trump's reelection campaign was oh so eager to prove the attorney's point, responding to the complaint by dismissing it as "just another frivolous, Election Interference lawsuit, filed by desperate left-wing activists" while trying to connect it to Harris and her campaign.

Specter told me the complaint, written in a way that avoids any extraneous political language, was about seeking "redress in the courts."

"It would have been nice if Mr. Trump would have had his lawyer respond to it to say whether it was true or false," Specter said.

Opinion:Michigan and Wisconsin are key for Harris. GOP groups want to help her win them.

Trump does have plenty of lawyers and he keeps them very busy.

Some of them lost the May 2023 civil case where Trump was held liable for sexually assaulting the writer E. Jean Carroll, who was awarded $5 million by a New York jury. Trump's lawyers also lost the follow-up defamation case Carroll filed against Trump, who was hit in January with an additional $83 million judgment.

So Trump, whom a jury found had sexually assaulted Carroll, has spent years falsely accusing the Exonerated Five of sexual assault and other violence. He is exactly the kind of person he claims to despise.

Will Trump ever be held accountable for this?

Two things can be true at the same time. This lawsuit can be unrelated to the election. But it can have consequences as Trump attempts to expand his support among Black and Latino voters.

Trump's appeal to hate in his 1989 newspaper ads always had the stench of racism, an undercurrent in his bid for attention just below the surface. His public pronouncements were bait for racists, the beginnings of his base.

Maybe the time has finally come for him to be held accountable for that, after 67 million debate viewers saw Trump repeat his lies about the Exonerated Five.

"It's devastating for them," Specter said. "They have to clear their name all over again. Now it's been defamed to 67 million people. And it just never stops."

Salaam, now 50, is a New York City Council member. He came to Philadelphia for last month's debate and tried to speak with Trump afterward in the "spin room," asking whether he would "apologize to the Exonerated Five."

"Ah, you're on my side then," Trump responded, in what feels like the one millionth moment of proof that his mind has turned to mush. He then waved and wandered away as Salaam repeated his request for an apology.

I hope we get the whole Trump show here ‒ a trial with an elderly defendant unable to remain awake until a jury holds him responsible in the only way that gets his attention: by squeezing him for cash. Trump won't be able to wander away from that.

#Opinion: Trump keeps lying about 'Central Park Five.' Black and Latino voters #take note.#tramp lies #Trump challenged to respond to lawsuit by lawyer who filed it

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theoryofweirdness · 3 months ago

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What if Deku Link was in Super Smash Bros.?

My Gravity Falls Smash movesets seem to have done reasonably well, so I thought I'd also post the other ideas I've had.

We all know that the Legend of Zelda series is in desperate need of more representation in Smash; even though there's six characters, three of them are just minor variations on the basic Link moveset and Ganondorf's moveset is famously still mostly the same as it was in Melee, that is to say, a copy of Captain Falcon and therefore not remotely representative of anything he does in any of his canon appearances. While there are plenty of fan projects focused around correcting that travesty (Project M comes to mind), there's still plenty more potential for Smash characters within Nintendo's third-biggest franchise.

Initially, I had conceived of the three main non-Hylian races in The Legend of Zelda (Gorons, Zoras, and Deku) as a single fighter that would transform between the three forms like Pokémon Trainer does, in an homage to the transformation mechanic from Majora's Mask (which should have 100% been the basis of Young Link's appearance in Ultimate; he'd look way cooler with the Gilded or Razor Sword and Mirror Shield than the Kokiri Sword and Deku Shield, and Fierce Deity as his Final Smash instead of the Triforce, since Young Link is literally the only version of the character who's never had it).

But I digress. After some work on that initial design, I realized that it would be much more fun to make each race a fully independent character, with moves and features pulled from across the whole Zelda series.

General Overview

The basis of this moveset is Deku Link from Majora's Mask, which serves as the character's default model. Though Deku Link is not a typical-looking Deku Scrub, he's the only one we ever see fight. Deku Scrub is the lightest and fastest of the three Zelda races, but doesn’t deal very much damage. Many of Deku Scrub's moves are similar to Lucas and Villager, though that’s just a coincidence. I only noticed those similarities after the fact. You’ll need to be quick and agile with this character, as they're very light and will be easily launched. Deku Scrub also has good ranged attacks that work very well for slowing enemies down and landing smash attacks or starting combos. As always, I haven't yet ironed out all the details, so any suggestions are welcome!

Size (Height/Weight stated as approximate comparison to existing fighters) Height: Small, similar size to Villager or Isabel. Weight: Featherweight. Since Deku Link is light enough to (briefly) walk on water, it’d be one of the lightest fighters in Smash. Likely comparable to Kirby.

Special Moves

[B] Neutral Special - Magic Bubble: [MA] Hold [B] to power up a bubble projectile. Smaller bubbles just pop and deal small flinching damage, but the fully charged bubble will also paralyze other fighters (like Z-suit Samus’s stunner). Enemies with higher damage will be paralyzed longer. Damage (min): 3% Damage (max): 5%

[B + </>] Side Special - Deku Nut: [PH] Spits a Deku Nut forward. It acts just like the item (bursts on contact with fighters/ground/items/etc., stuns grounded fighters, damages and launches airborne fighters), but with a lot less damage. Has an 8-second cooldown until you can use it again. You can use this Special Move while flying with Deku Scrub’s U-Special by pressing [A], in which case it will fall straight down. Damage (to airborne): 11.5% Cooldown: 8 seconds

[^ + B] Up Special - Deku Flower Flight: [EA] Use two Deku flowers to fly through the air with a lot of control. If started on the ground, you’ll burrow into a Deku Flower first, then burst out when [B] is released. Bursting out can deal damage and launch enemies until you reach the peak of the jump, though it’s strongest at the base. The flight part of the move is much the same as Villager or Isabel’s balloon flight. Your flowers can be hit; lose one and you can’t gain height, lose both and you’ll go into freefall. Damage (max, flower burst): 23%

[v + B] Down Special - Magic Beans: A 3-step move, like Villager’s Garden. 1: Plant a magic bean (trips enemies)

2: Water it from a bottle (pushes enemies)

3: The bean sprouts into a leafy platform item. It will rise into the air when a fighter stands on it. You can use this to move upward, or throw enemies onto it to mess them up and possibly KO off the top of the stage. Also, Deku Scrub and Villager can water each others’ sprouts!

Ground Moves

[A] Jab: [PH] 2 quick punches. Very short ranged, but good for jab-locking. Damage (per hit):

[>>, A] Dash Attack: [PH] A multi-hitting hat spin, much like Megaman’s Dash Attack. Damage (per hit): 1%

Smash Attacks

[A + <</>>] Side Smash: [PH] A powerful swing with a Deku Stick that can reflect projectiles. Has a strong launching sweet spot at the tip. Nearly identical to Lucas’s S-Smash. Damage (max, sweetspot):

[^^ + A] Up Smash: [WI] A bubble blast overhead. Charging increases the size of the blast. It isn’t particularly powerful, but has very little end lag and charges quicker than most Smash attacks. Damage (max):

[vv + B] Down Smash: [PH] Smash a Deku Nut on the ground. Low damage, but can stun ground-borne enemies. Similar to Villager’s D-smash. Damage (max):

Tilts

[<A>] Side Tilt: [PH] A shorter hat spin than the Dash Attack that moves forward and hits once on both sides. Damage:

[^A] Up Tilt: [PH] Spin a Deku stick overhead, just like Villager’s U-tilt, though this one only hits once, but launches farther. Damage: 3%

[vA] Down Tilt: [PH] Spin the wood shell that Deku Scrub is hiding in once. Hits enemies up in front of you, so it’s good for combos. Also hits in the back, but it’s stronger in front. Damage (front): 4.5% Damage (back): a

Air Attacks

[Jump, A] N-Air: [PH] Midair spin. Can be a good combo starter. Damage:

[Jump, > + A] F-Air: [PH] Spit a Deku seed forward with good range. Very similar to Villager’s F-air. Damage: 3%

[Jump, ^ + A] U-Air: [PH] Headbutt. Quick, decent damage, good for juggling. Damage:

[Jump, < + A] B-Air: [PH] Spit a Deku seed backward with good range (same as F-air). Damage: 3%

[Jump, v + A] D-Air: [PH] A spinning drill kick that multihits and spikes enemies downward on the final hit, similar to Kirby’s D-air. Damage (per hit): 1%

Grabs and Throws

[Grab] Grab: Traps the enemy inside a large bubble (based on the manga, where Link traps Tatl in a bubble shortly after being transformed into a Deku Scrub).

[Grab, A] Pummel: Bounce on top of the bubble.

[Grab, >] F-Throw: [PH] Use a Deku stick as a bat to hit the bubble forward. It pops after a short distance, but until then it can hit other fighters. Damage (to grabbed): Damage (hit by bubble):

[Grab, ^] U-Throw: [PH] Go underneath the bubble and spit it upward, where it pops overhead. Can damage other fighters when the bubble pops. Damage (to grabbed): Damage (to others when popped):

[Grab, <] B-Throw: [PH] Use a hat spin to hit the bubble backward. It can hit other fighters and pops after a short distance. Damage (to grabbed): Damage (to others):

[Grab, v] D-Throw: [PH] Jump hard on top of the bubble and pop it, landing on top of the enemy. The pop can hit other fighters. Damage (to grabbed): Damage (to others):

Movement (Speed and jump height stated as approximate comparison to existing fighters.)

[</>] Walking: Due to its short legs, Deku Scrub is a slow walker, probably not the slowest in the game, but definitely not fast either.

[<</>>] Dash: Fortunately, running is much faster, since Deku Link appears to run very fast (though looks like he’s going to fall over). Like Luigi, Deku Scrub will slide when changing directions or stopping while running.

[Jump] Jumps: 2, with the second one being considerably higher, but not a “flying” jump like Mewtwo or Yoshi.

[v] Crouch: hide under a wooden shell (Deku Link's shield from Majora’s Mask)

[Shield + v/^] Spot dodge: Basic background dodge.

[Shield + >] F-roll: Roll forward (looks like head is rolling).

[Shield + <] B-roll: Basic backward roll

[Jump, Shield + Air dodge: Basic air dodge.

Miscellaneous

Up Taunt: Plays the in-game note sequence of the Sonata of Awakening (the Deku Scrubs’ key song) on the Deku Pipes.

Down Taunt: Spins around, staying in place.

Side Taunt: Hold up a Deku flower like an umbrella (inspired by the Deku Butler).

Idle Animation: Looks around, sneezes.

Stage entry: Pop out of a yellow Deku Flower.

Origin Symbol: Triforce (same as the other Zelda fighters)

Kirby Hat: Wears the Deku Mask from Majora’s Mask (Magic Bubble).

Victory 1: Same as U-taunt, but plays the entire song, not just the in-game input segment.

Victory 2: Fly in on Deku flower copters, then dive into a large Deku Flower on the ground and pop back out facing the camera.

Victory 3: (description)

FINAL SMASH: Lost Woods

Deku Scrub plays Saria’s Song on the Deku Pipes and the stage is transported into the Lost Woods. Enemies are randomly teleported around (though not over pits) while Deku Babas and Mad Scrubs appear to attack them. Lasts 15 seconds. All other stage effects are disabled or halted during this Final Smash. Mad Scrubs will pop out of the ground to fire barrages of nuts, and with so many of them, enemies will be hard-pressed to avoid taking heavy damage. Deku Babas will lunge at nearby enemies with surprising reach, delivering strong launching bites. Damage (Deku Baba bite) [PH]: 12% Damage (Mad Scrub shot) [PH]: 8%

Alternate Colors 1) Default Deku Link colors (brown wood, green hat and tunic)

2) Blue Deku Link (tunic & hat)

3) Orange Deku Link with green leaves/hair

4) Dark Link inspired (black tunic and hat, red eyes, dark gray wood)

5) Alternate costume: Deku Princess (red and white dress, leafy green ponytail with a pink flower at the tip)

6) Purple Deku Princess (purple dress, yellow flower)

7) White Deku Princess (white dress and ponytail, yellow flower)

8) Yellow Deku Princess (yellow dress, blue flower)

#super smash bros #what if they were in smash?#the legend of zelda #majora's mask #deku link #deku scrub #moveset

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thefamilyeldritchabomination · 11 months ago

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Chapter Twenty One: Quidam Pt. 1

Pain, pure and simple pain course through Envy’s body as they relived the very moment of being reborn as a homunculus that fateful night. The screaming, yelling, THAT KICK from Mother Dearest, and the fast approaching paternal abandonment playing back from the start of their hatred. Envy had forgotten just how painful everything was for them when they first came back from the dead through unethical means thanks to Mother’s mercury poisoning and Father’s stupidly using alchemy as a bandage for unintentional homicide. This is exactly why Envy had wished to kill and torment Hohenheim so badly and wanting to carry over to their mother next once everything was over with. However, nothing much could’ve been done thanks to Envy’s current state of being a pain filled misery meatball on the library floor when the knock could be heard by the main door. Ah, yes, that simply has to be the root of this miserable scenario, that old man named Humphrey had come to make amends. Instead of the door being closed, there was an argument and someone barged into the mansion after calling bullshit correctly dripping from Hohenheim’s mouth.

“I said get back here at once! You weren’t invited into my household, my SON HAS DIED!” Hohenheim bellowed as he stormed after the intruders making their very correct way to the library.

“Yeah no, I smelled William in here and he smells very much alive to me right now.” A voice clearly belonging to Dolly answered as she beelined for the library door to fetch Envy from that hellish household.

“Dolly, please don’t make a scene, remember what happened last time you were out in public?” Humphrey begged as Dolly continued on track towards the very much a meatball Envy in the library.

“Unfortunately Humphrey, we don’t have the spontaneous act of cannibalism happening right now.” Dolly responded, clearly she was very rightfully upset after Humphrey confessed earlier to driving William out in the first place.

“What the hell does any of this mean or even do with the damn fact you’re breaking into my own house!?” Hohenheim howled in anger as Dolly reached the doorway to the library.

“I told you before sir, we came to bring William back to our place and Humphrey owes him an apology.” Dolly said in a sharp tone as she went to open the library door.

“Don’t open that!” Hohenheim yelled as Dolly swung open the door to an absolutely gruesome as can be sight splattered upon the floor.

There was a gasp from Dolly as she ran over to the sapient meatball on the floor, checking the poor wretch over to see what she could do to help. Humphrey froze up upon getting a good look at the horrorshow that Envy had become on the floor thanks to their parents. Hohenheim could only stand in place as the harsh and rightfully earned judgemental glares came directed at him upon seeing the state Envy was in. It took a moment or two before Humphrey started making his way towards Dolly. It was clear to the old man, Dolly was most certainly going to bring the meatball back home with them and nothing would convince her otherwise. The fates had their funny way of letting things come full circle when the screeching nightmare that was the rapidly fast approaching soon to be Exwife, Dante, came charging into the library. The creepy youth seeking abomination had heard the commotion and finally came to see what trainwreck came into HER mansion. Dante’s eyes narrowed at Dolly, evidently that was the girl her son was about to leave them for before her son’s unfortunate run in with mercury enriched fish. Dolly, on the otherhand, couldn’t give a flying fuck who this creepy and possibly underaged girl was before her as she comforted Envy and got them ready for the teleporting.

“Who the hell are you!? What are you doing with that travesty that was formerly our son!?” Dante screeched as she stomped her way over.

“Seriously? You married that? Aren’t you grossed out by marrying someone that young?” Humphrey looked at Hohenheim with full disgust over his choice of wife and the monstrous age gap before him.

“Trust me, I feel disgusted too…my wife likes to keep getting younger bodies to switch into…” Hohenheim admitted, even he was really grossed out by Dante’s youth obsession.

“Shut up! I’m going to stay young and beautiful forever! The younger the longer that beauty lasts!” Dante’s inability to understand just how grotesque that mentality and obsession was truly a horrifying display to behold.

“...Okay yeah so you’re basically a hermit crab that shouldn’t be allowed alone with young kids, fuck off with that bullcrap. I’m taking William out of this environment and away from your screeching madness.” Dolly slowly got up from the ground, she truly was done with this couple of grotesque portions as Dante snapped.

“You have the nerve to equate me, ME with some lowly hermit crab? You used hermit crab as a reference to me in my PRESENCES!” Dante screamed as she made a run at Dolly.

Slowly, Dolly lifted her right arm, her back turned from the screeching madness known as Dante before casually taking a ‘gentle’ swing at Dante’s mid torso. The impact was something only few had seen on the battlefield from cannon fire as the mid section of Dante’s body vaporized into a fine red mist from the impact, body parts falling onto the floor as Dante’s eyes rolled back into her skull. From that moment onward, Envy learned, if Dolly was pissed off enough, she could easily obliterate Dante without any real efforts. Their worry about Dante being a threat to Dolly was all for nothing after basically witnessing Dante becoming a vaporized mist. Hohenheim froze in fear of just how quickly and brutally Dante was dispatched as Dolly glared the old alchemist down, daring him to do or say anything to her at that moment. Likewise, Humphrey was running his wrinkled old hands along the inside of his jacket, looking for something to whip out just because of this situation.

#Fullmetal Alchemist #FMA 03 #fan fiction #The Wayfarer #Envy the Jealous #FMA fan fiction #OCs #homunculus #writing #Envy #Hohenheim #Dante

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courtneysmovieblog · 1 year ago

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Ending 2023 with "The Color Purple"

No matter how bleak life seems, there's always hope for better times.

The new musical movie adaptation of The Color Purple reminds us of this, so maybe it's fitting that it was the movie that I wound up ending the year with.

Let's get this out of the way: it is NOT a remake. It's a movie adaptation out of the Broadway musical that was indeed made out of the movie, no different from Hairspray and the upcoming Mean Girls. Do not dismiss it as a cash grab when director Blitz Bazawule clearly puts his heart and soul into this film, and so did the cast.

Although in fairness, it is hard not to compare it to the original 1985 movie when it had such brilliant work from the likes of Whoopi Goldberg, Oprah, and Danny Glover. The fact that it lost out on the Oscars remains a travesty to this day that I neither forgive nor forget.

Yet this cast is just as spectacular. Fantasia Barrino's Celie more than lives up to Whoopi Goldberg's legacy while making the role her own. Her emotionally charged performance reminds us all why she won American Idol, and while she hasn't had the best of luck since then, I hope this film helps turn that luck around.

Taraji P Henson wows as Shug Avery, Celie's lover -- and yes, this version makes it crystal clear that they ARE lovers while the original movie just alluded it to it. I have to admit, part of me would have liked it if Jennifer Hudson reprised her Broadway role just so that we could have seen her and fellow American Idol alumni Barrino play a couple, but oh well. Danielle Brooks fearlessly takes on Sofia -- the role Oprah originated, and she couldn't have done a better job.

A special shout out goes to Halle Bailey, who plays Celie's sister Nettie (the teenage version, anyway) and proves that her Little Mermaid was no fluke. I can't wait for more from her.

Despite the horrific and heartbreaking events Celie and other characters goes through, the movie manages to be a pretty uplifting musical, with vibrant visuals and songs. It pulls this off in a way that feels genuine without being corny.

My only problem with the movie concerns the resolution between Celie and her abusive husband Albert (Coleman Domingo). For those that never read the novel or saw the Broadway musical, Celie winds up becoming friends with her abusive ex-husband. With all due respect to Alice Walker, I just can't get behind that. Not after everything he did to her. I preferred how the 1985 version ended it: with Danny Glover's Albert discretely doing right by Celie and nobody except Shug knowing. That, I felt, was believable: it didn't make up for everything he did to her, and he didn't expect it to. True redemption is doing the right thing without getting anything out of it.

But that's my opinion.

All that aside, The Color Purple deserves all the awards and acclaim that original deserved and never got. Your move, Oscars.

9 out of 10

#review #musicals #halle bailey

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spinningbuster98 · 1 year ago

Video

youtube

Mega Man X7 Ending

Ladies and gentlemen: it’s July 17th.

Today officially marks Mega Man X7′s 20th anniversary, as the game originally came out in Japan exactly 20 years ago today!

And what better way to celebrate than to finally put an end to this trainwreck of a game!

The first of the final stages, Palace Road, is one of the slowest, most awkward autoscrollers you’ll ever play!

Not only is it slow due to X7′s natural sluggishness, but the camera also does a miserable job at showing you incoming obstacles, enemies and bottomless pits, meaning that you pretty much have to avoid dashing otherwise you ight just find yourself falling off a cliff and even then you will ram into enemies coming from offscreen more times than you can count. So we’re off to a great start already!

And then we have the final stage: The Crimson Palace

I dunno if you have noticed but this video is almost an hour long

About 90% of that time is spent in the Crimson Palace

It’s not that the level design is particularily awful, Sure it’s bad but nothing too out of the ordinary for this game

It’s just that it keeps going on

And on

And OOOOOOOOOON

This level has the same issue as Gate’s second stage in X6 in that it keeps going even after the first boss battle

The fight against Red is one of the worst, if not THE worst boss fight in Mega Man history

You have to keep track of him as he teleports around this arena made up of platforms over a bottomless pit, as the camera makes no attempt at focusing on him, while you have to deal with X7′s controls and hit detection/boxes, making jumping precisely on those platforms a goddamn chore AND you also have to avoid his fake clones.

This fight is absolutely shit (and it’s shit that drags too, he’s got a lot of health) because you’re not actually fighting Red, you’re effectively fighting the camera and the controls.

The only boss fights that come close are those from Legends 1, and even then I’m generally more forgiving to those because

1) It’s an early PS1 game and issues with the camera and controls in 3D games were standard back then

2) Mega Man Juno may be a piece of shit but he’s not a piece of shit that you have to fight over a fucking bottomless pit!

And then the level keeps going through another series of boring and awkward platforming sections

Then we reach the boss rush

Credit where it’s due: the room is very creepy and atmospheric and the fact that the teleporters look like graves is really apt for this context

But fucking hell man!

I spent 20 minutes on this boss rush alone!

20 MINUTES!

All because X7′s bosses are just so fucking tanky and their weaknesses are mostly worthless against them!

This is the absolute worst boss rush I have ever seen

20 minutes!

I could probably beat Eggmanland in less time! And that’s a whole stinking level!!!

And then we get to Sigma and every time he says “That’s right, folks!” and “Fellas” I’m expecting the Loony Toones logo to pop up around him

His first phase is nothing fancy

His second phase is another travesty due to, again, forcing you to platform in 3D over a bottomless pit with these controls

Luckily even if you get a game over here you just restart the second phase

I used to rage hard here but then I discovered on the Internet that he’s really weak to the charged version of Splash Warfly’s weapon. Whatever, so long as it gets the job done

The final cutscene changes depending on the character that dealt the final blow to Sigma

In X’s ending we can see that he hasn’t learned a goddamn thing and he’s still bitching about Axl using violence to deal with Mavericks, he even sounds arrogant when he says that “You can’t train someone to become a hunter like me”. Wonderful

Axl’s ending is a continuation of X’s in a way:

youtube

Zero’s ending on the other end is just a shallow tie-in with the Zero series (which was a thing by this point)

youtube

Was he just...napping while standing up...? Do robots need to sleep? I mean in X4′s intro he’s also sleeping and dreaming but he’s in a capsule so I assumed he was also charging up his batteries or maybe undergoing light maintenance or something. Then again in the Zero series we do see that Reploids have normal beds in their rooms so.... meh who gives a shit, certainly not the developers at this point

Happy Birthday Mega Man X7!!!

#youtube #megaman #mega man x7 #my gameplay

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ssaalexblake · 2 years ago

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there isn’t a power in the world that’d get me to rewatch s3 of stp but i Swear I do in fact remember Jack being shoved in the brig bc he did a murder. Like, i mean, he was not convicted or anything but he was implicated and was going to be put on trial for this among other, smaller, crimes. I’m sure I didn’t make that up. He got out of the brig by trickery (though, he did do so to save the crew of the titan which is honourable, i’ll give him that).

And while the show Has had more than one member of the cast commit murder, so that isn’t exactly a moral judgement against him narratively even if he did kill somebody, the show has Also generally made a vague effort to portray a justice system. Agnes was cleared of murder charges because of that mind meld, proving that Yes, some kind of justice system is in action here.

Seven committed murder. Two, in fact. On screen. But the only person she told was Rios and he’s evidently not a snitch. Seven has not been put on trial because, frankly, she’s apparently just better at murder.

Elnor also had that head lopping off thing going on. I doubt Starfleet has record of this considering where it happened. Also arguments of self-defence may apply. I don’t remember exactly though, I didn’t like that episode (the exposition eps in serials Usually suck and that did not break trend imo).

So like... Did starfleet just decide to ignore that murder when all this chaos blew over? Was the murder a non issue? I mean it’s not like we can Add contextually to this him controlling crew members against their will to Knowingly cart his ass off to the borg queen which resulted in All That Death and Destruction and Trauma as well, which you’d think would result in Some consequences. Even if the consequences were a psych eval to determine his culpability. Even if they decided he was Not culpable, it would still have been a consequence of all this.

What i’m saying basically is that it canonically took Agnes a year to get off a murder charge due to somebody messing with her brain in Significantly less complicated circumstances than Mr. Borg Jr who Also had a murder charge against him.

Yet in a year He’s apparently been fast tracked through the academy that Should take years, only to be assigned to the flag ship, and be sat on a chair on the bridge as a Special Councillor.

I’ve not been this mad at white man bullshit in scifi since that fuckawful ad astra film where the protag commits muder in space bc he’s such a sad sad man and poor Him and goes back home scott free and then Gets The Girl as a reward.

I’m not even saying that Jack necessarily Would have been found culpable, it’s canon that people screwing with your brain Is a legal defence in this time bc we saw it with Agnes, and he quite obviously had weird things going on inside his head far out of his control making him act in ways he wouldn’t have done had it not happened, but it’s also canon that the system takes time in Far less complicated situations.

It also adds insult to injury that even if all the above wasn’t an issue, what happened at the end would Still be a travesty of nepotism and white man self insert characters. But it makes it So So So much worse in context.

#that picard one #picard spoilers

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sublimeobservationarcade · 2 months ago

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Get Ready For the Rewriting Of American History

I have just had my post “America Chooses A Crook For President” taken down by LinkedIn because it has been categorised as hate speech. Is this just the beginning of a wave of revisionism in the wake of the return of Donald Trump to the presidency? Get ready for the rewriting of American history, as the Trump forces will be removing multiple criminal charges against Trump. The DOJ is already taking steps to do so. The rest of the world looks on gobsmacked by the behaviour of Americans. Is there no decency, no morality left on this landmass home to some 333 million Americans?

Prepare For Revisionism Folks USA Style

Electing a convicted criminal, bankrupt both morally and financially, to the highest office in the land says more about Americans than anything else. Trump is the most divisive figure in American politics over the last decade and he was chosen over the opportunity for a fresh start. Why? Americans have lost touch with reality, with the meaning of the rule of law. It has to be the most cynical decision made in the history of the country. Say farewell to integrity, and hello to more distorted misanthropic BS disguising gross self-interest. Everyone who worked with Trump in his first administration came out and told the world the ugly truth about this guy. Is America in love with craziness and dysfunction? “Presented with a choice between electing the first black, female president on a promise of a sunnier future, and a racist, misogynist, twice-impeached convicted felon hawking hatred and retribution, they picked Mr Trump. “ - (https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2024/nov/06/the-guardian-view-on-the-return-of-president-trump-a-bleak-day-for-america-and-the-world)

U.S. President Donald Trump at the 101st by U.S. Department of Agriculture is licensed under CC-CC0 1.0

Fictions Over Facts In Trump’s America

Do you remember the absurdity of totalitarian communist regimes in the USSR? Maybe not, maybe you are too young, well the American take on reality is heading that way fast. Up is down and down is up. January 6 was a love-in, according to Trump, despite the deaths and violence writ large. Biden was bad for the economy, despite the facts that the economy actually outperformed the world and Trump’s first time in office, but these are just the economic facts. America is not interested in facts it has drunk the kool aid and lives in an alternate fictional realm. Americans Feel Too Poor For Progressive Ideas Like Equality The richest nation on earth cannot afford high falutin concepts like justice, fairness, and democratic values, apparently. The American people have voted for short termism economic imperatives by putting the guy who looks after the super-rich back in the White House. No more actual work on repairing massive inequality via anti-trust measures designed to rein in the billionaires. No, the die has been cast for self-interest and who has the loudest voice for self-interest in the nation? Elon Musk and the oligarchs. Project 2025 has a lot of work to do to install endemic corruption in the institutions of the American government. This will be a travesty and the world will be watching on. The wrong headed and corrupt will be back in charge of the world’s once greatest democratic nation. A paranoid Trump hell bent on retribution making a meal of governing all over again. Get ready for the rewriting of American history. Robert Sudha Hamilton is the author of America Matters: Pre-apocalyptic Posts & Essays in the Shadow of Trump. ©HouseTherapy

Nope! Read the full article

#Americans #DOJ #Harris #President #revisionism #rewritinghistory #Trump

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bllsbailey · 2 months ago

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NBC Forced to Give Trump Two Minutes of Airtime and Boy Does He Deliver: ‘Kamala Broke It, I’ll Fix It’

Saturday Night Live's effort to give Kamala Harris some free publicity backfired spectacularly when NBC was forced to provide Donald Trump equal airtime. And the former president used that time to his full advantage.

SNL had initially refused to allow any presidential candidates to make cameos during their sketch comedy show but then tossed that faux integrity right out the window when Harris made a surprise appearance.

As per usual, Harris was awkward and couldn't contain her cackle. Oh, and she also plagiarized a skit that Trump performed in 2015.

What made matters worse, however, was that the network was clearly in violation of the FCC's equal-time rule. The rule essentially states that if you're going to offer X amount of time to a political candidate, you have to give the same option to their opponent.

Trump's campaign said they never received an SNL invite, and FCC Commissioner Brendan Carr called them out publicly for "a clear and blatant effort to evade" the rule and thus skirt election law.

With pressure mounting over the controversy, NBC News filed an Equal Time notice with the Federal Communications Commission late Sunday.

"Kamala Harris, the Democratic candidate for president in the 2024 national election, appeared without charge on NBC's 'Saturday Night Live' (SNL) for a total period of 1 minute and 30 seconds on November 2, 2024," the notice reads.

The problem, as RedState reported, is that they squeezed Harris' performance in on the last Saturday before the election, meaning even if Trump wanted to do a brief cameo on SNL, it would be impossible.

NBC, backed into a corner over the blatant FCC violation, was forced to throw the GOP nominee a bone. That bone came in the form of two ad spots during Sunday's NASCAR coverage, together with another aired during Sunday Night Football.

Those are two very pricey timeslots for ads to run, with the Daily Mail estimating each to have a price tag in the ballpark of $1.7 million.

Having very little time to prepare for this, Trump's campaign put together a quick ad of the candidate standing in front of several American flags, wearing his signature Make America Great Again hat.

“Hello to our great sports fans, and I hope you’re having a fantastic time," Trump begins in the NBC-approved political ad. "We’re two days away from the most important election in the history of our country. We’ve got to save our country, and it needs saving; it’s in very bad shape."

He then dove head first into the travesty that is the Harris-Biden administration:

The worst economic numbers in generations were just announced two days ago. We’re losing jobs. We’re losing everything, including viability. We’re gonna end up in a depression, based on what’s been happening. We’ve never seen anything like it, at least for the last 40 years. We have to straighten out our country. We have to close our borders. We have to lower our taxes. We have to get rid of inflation. And we are going to do it.

Kamala used her two minutes to stifle laughter while the audience screeched after seeing her on camera, delivering flat jokes surrounding the only credentials she believes matter — the fact that she's "a Black South Asian woman running for president."

Trump spoke directly into the camera regarding the economy, something that affects Americans' everyday lives.

Kamala's performance was a thinly veiled hobnobbing vanity project with her elite Hollywood friends. Trump's message was delivered to NASCAR and football fans watching at home.

The contrast is clear.

"Just remember," Trump concludes. "Kamala and her friends broke it, I’ll fix it."

"Most important election in the history of our country. Go and vote.”

Vote like your wallet, if not your life, depends on it.

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solidandsound · 3 months ago

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Etrian Odyssey II - Notes on a journey

THE PARTY

Fret, Troubadour (portrait 3)

A fret is a piece that sits behind the strings on the neck of a stringed instrument, such as the lute that Fret plays.

Long ago, when they were all young, Fret, Contra, Travis, Ossia, and Barry formed a musical group, called Frisson. They never got popular, and eventually the others lost interest or faith in their ability to break through into the mainstream, and the band fell apart. Fret was always the most devoted. After Frisson disbanded, he continued to play music on his own, scraping by as a travelling troubadour. Recently, he made his way to Etria, and while there, he heard a lot about a group of youngsters who made major headway in the Yggdrasil labyrinth attached to the town. Fret and the other members of Frisson grew up in High Lagaard, which also had a labyrinth, but he never gave it much thought. Seeing the fame afforded to these young adventurers, however, gets his wheels turning...

Barry, War Magus (portrait 1)

Barry is named in reference to baritone, a male singing voice with a range between bass and tenor.

In the days of Frisson, Barry was the group’s male singer. An immigrant to High Lagaard from the far south, his voice lent Frisson a unique edge, and he appreciated the companionship. Having come from a more musical culture, Barry enjoyed his time with the band, but found few opportunities to sing after its disbandment.

Barry has since become a city guard, and is watching the road into town when Fret comes sauntering back. Barry casually asks where Fret’s been, and Fret launches into his story about what he heard over in Etria and how he’s getting the band back together... to do some dungeon diving. Barry isn’t asked to commit to anything, only to meet up with Fret later, where he’ll explain everything. Then Fret runs off, leaving Barry confused, but curious.

Ossia, Hexer (portrait 3)

An ossia is an alternate musical passage which may be played instead of the original.

Before Ossia joined, another man held his place in Frisson, but that person was not a team player and was frequently disruptive with the aim of taking the spotlight, a habit made worse by the fact that he was in charge of the cymbal and other backing instruments. After that guy was fired, Ossia showed interest in taking his role. While the others were originally hesitant because Ossia gives off a somewhat creepy vibe, he ended up being a perfect fit.

Since the band’s breakup, Ossia has taken advantage of his creepy vibes and background as a Hexer to tell fortunes. However, everything he foretells is fabricated, as that’s not actually something that Hexers can do—most people just don’t know that. Ossia would really rather be doing anything else, and is pleased to see Fret enter his tent. The musician’s pitch leaves Ossia intrigued, and he decides to meet with Fret later, as requested, to find out more.

Contra, Gunner (portrait 4) and Travis, Ronin (portrait 1)

Contra is short for contralto, a type of singing voice with a low vocal range. Travis is a play on travesti, a term for a character in an opera or other performance that is played by someone of the opposite sex.

Contra was Frisson’s female vocalist, her surprisingly low singing voice complementing Barry’s well. Travis played a special piano configured for easy travel. Fret has been friends with these two since long before the forming of Frisson, and they were its first members, with Barry and finally Ossia joining later. Contra is quite shy, but was able to let loose in front of an audience. Travis always felt unable to express himself, except when behind the piano. These two bonded even further while playing music together, and soon fell in love and have remained together this whole time. They have stuck together through everything, from Contra’s health issues to Travis coming out as trans.

However, outside of their relationship, their lives have not been particularly fulfilling. Contra holds a mind-numbing secretarial job, and Travis does landscaping for High Lagaard’s wealthy. Their feelings are complicated seeing Fret, as they always are. Fret visits now and then, but his role in their lives is far reduced from what it once was. This time seems different, however, and so they agree to meet up later.

That evening, all five members of Frisson gather at a local restaurant. Contra and Travis haven’t had many opportunities lately to socialize with Barry and Ossia, and find the reunion pleasant, if a little awkward. Then Fret lays out the plan. As Frisson, they had a few dedicated fans who loved their sound, but had a hard time getting others to listen to them. But if they had had some fame to build off of, things could have been different.

In Etria, a guild met with great adventuring success and, subsequently, great fame. If Frisson could do the same, they could use that fame as a launching point for their musical careers. They could finally be a successful band!

Travis shuts it down, saying that those days have passed, but he is surprised when Barry and Ossia agree immediately. Neither man is happy with what they’re doing, so why not give it a go? Still, Travis doubts the likelihood of this plan succeeding. Why blow up their lives for something so risky? Right? He turns to Contra, but she hesitates. What if this could be their chance to make lives they can be proud of?

If it’s what Contra wants, he can’t bring himself to say no. Fret is ecstatic: the band is back together! The next day, they gear up and head to the guild office to register their band, nay, their guild, and tackle the labyrinth together.

FIRST STRATUM: Ancient Forest

Travis and Contra quit their crappy jobs. Fret and Ossia have no obligations to wrap up and are ready to go immediately. Barry simply ghosts the guard corps. He figures no one will miss him, or even recognize him if he runs into his old coworkers in the forest. They all look the same in their armour anyway.

In order to be allowed to explore the labyrinth further, the guild must first take on the Duchy’s introductory test, which is to map the first floor accurately. Barry is well aware of this, and has at times been the one to judge newbies’ maps. When they enter the labyrinth, a guard stops them to confirm their identities. Barry avoids eye contact, but the guard doesn’t seem to recognize him, as he assumed would be the case. The guard then takes them to a spot deep into the first floor and leaves them there to find their way back.

Contra and Travis start to panic, feeling that they have just been left to die. Indeed, some folks have died doing this, Barry says. But he reassures them: he can guide them in doing this as quickly and safely as possible, as long as they can survive any monster attacks along the way. Fret says that he has a great sense of direction and they should just head back the way they came, but Barry reminds him that that’s not all they need to do. They also need to map the area, and that includes dead ends and false paths. He remembers some of them, but in order to record them in accurate detail, he suggests they actually explore each path.

Having to engage in combat for the first time is jarring, but ultimately not too threatening. The party efficiently maps the area and returns to have the guard evaluate their work. With his approval, they report in to Minister Dubois at the duchy, who officially declares Frisson to be adventurers of Lagaard. He shares his hope that they may unveil the truth behind the myth of the floating castle at the top of the labyrinth. He also gives them a little spending money to get started, but it’s not much. Travis gets a little nervous seeing how little they’re meant to get by on, but Ossia knows from his interactions with adventurers that they can pick up some odd jobs at the tavern.

With that in mind, Frisson begins its exploration in earnest, making a bit of progress each time, avoiding tougher enemies and taking on tavern requests here and there to make a bit more money on top of selling what they find.

On the third floor, the group encounters a wolf, but it does not attack them. Instead, it seems to wish to direct them somewhere. Contra is smitten with the handsome hound; she and Travis have always wanted a dog, but have been waiting until they felt they could better take care of one. They follow the wolf’s directions and soon run into a man who calls himself Hrothgar, of Guild Beowulf. He gives the newbies some helpful tips, and then is joined by the wolf from before, apparently named Wulfgar. The two leave together; Contra is impressed by how helpful Wulfgar seems to be in the labyrinth.

The crew continues to check in with Minister Dubois every once in a while. On one visit, he expresses regret that adventurers seem, by and large, more competent than the guard corps posted in the forest, and wonders if he should be recruiting adventurers for the guard corps. Thinking back, Barry knows he never had as hard a time as a guard as he has so far as an adventurer. Maybe if this doesn’t pan out, he thinks, he can rejoin the corps and negotiate a raise...

Further into the third floor, Frisson sees Hrothgar and Wulfgar once again, guarding a door. Hrothgar stops them, and tells them to speak to the Duchy before they can proceed. When they speak to Dubois, they learn that ten guards have gone missing recently in the labyrinth. Barry feels strange upon hearing the news. Is it relief? Regret? He’s not sure. While saving the guards sounds like a lot of responsibility, Fret also knows that it is this kind of heroism that will kick off the fame they’re looking for, so the guild accepts the task.

Hrothgar lets the guild past, though his mood seems off. He warns them that the next room is filled with powerful monsters. Indeed, when they enter, they hear the cry of a beast and see, and smell, numerous corpses. Travis throws up. Barry is frozen; this could have been him... It is Ossia who gently pushes the group to continue. He counts only nine bodies.

With some careful sneaking, the guild finds a secret passage and there meet the final surviving guard. They help him escape back to town. There, Dubois thanks them with some cash, and tells them about what the guard was investigating in there to begin with. Apparently another monster, the Chimaera, is attracting more monsters than usual to the first stratum of the labyrinth. Frisson has Dubois’s trust now, and so they are tasked with defeating it.

While running errands, Fret hears the name Frisson come up every once in a while. It seems they are starting to get recognized as a strong guild... but he knows it’s not yet enough.

On the fourth floor, a guard tells the group that Beowulf have already gone up to the fifth floor to challenge Chimaera. Apparently, some of the guild’s members were killed by Chimaera some time ago, leaving only Hrothgar and Wulfgar. They lost with five members, but attempt the beast now with only two... Fret seems to miss this detail and suggests hurrying before Beowulf steal their thunder. Barry corrects him: they must hurry to save Beowulf. Contra is beside herself. “That poor, loyal puppy...”

On the fifth floor, Ossia points out a trail of blood. The guild follows it to find Wulfgar, alone and injured. Wulfgar points them westward and cries mournfully. Given that he is alone, that cry can only mean one thing... Contra wants to pet the dog, to comfort him, but cannot tell where he is injured through his thick fur, and so stays her hand. Travis shakes with rage. He assures Wulfgar that vengeance will be had.

The party confronts the Chimaera and, through a long battle with it and its lackeys, fell it. It lets out a final shriek, which nets a howling response from somewhere not too far away. Contra recognizes it immediately and rushes off, with the others hurrying to keep up with her.

Wulfgar is still where they left him, still heavily injured. However, he seems much less distressed. Upon Contra’s approach, the beast removes his collar with his paw, then lays down and closes his eyes. Crying, Contra takes the collar, Wulfgar’s final thanks for bringing peace to him and the rest of his guild.

SECOND STRATUM: Auburn Thicket

Even after taking their reward for defeating the Chimaera, the mood surrounding Frisson is muted as they enter the second stratum. A trail of berries catches Fret’s curiosity, so he follows it, with the rest of the group trailing behind. Something feels off, though, so he stops short of the end of the trail. Contra, deep in her fugue, keeps on mindlessly, and before anyone can stop her, gets her foot caught in a trap. It is easy enough for Travis’s blade to remove, and Contra’s injuries are minor, but it is enough to snap her back to reality a bit. There is danger everywhere in the labyrinth.

Further on, a hemp sack is seen dangling from a tree. Wary of another trap, the group examines the area thoroughly, but finds no threat. Barry climbs the tree to grab the sack. He manages to retrieve it, but upon reaching the ground, finds that his hands burn something fierce. Traps aside, even the trees themselves seem out to get the adventurers of the forest.

The next time Frisson checks in at the Duchy, they are let in on a secret: the Duke is very ill. His daughter is doing her best to find a cure, as she already lost her mother some time ago. Following her mother’s medicinal notes, she is tracking down ingredients in the forest that may help. Frisson is asked now to retrieve an ingredient that can be used to make a so-called “miracle cure”. Fret’s eyes shine. Saving the life of the Duke will get them the acclaim they’re looking for, that’s for sure! The ingredient in question is a feather from the Salamox, a formidable fire-breathing beast.

The guild also picks up a request at the bar to map the 7th and 8th floors, as the guard corp are having trouble with the task. On the 7th floor, they run into one such guard, who happily passes off the job to Frisson. He even hands them his map so far, and Fret is happy to have a head start, but as soon as the guard is out of sight, Barry takes his map and shreds it. He knows what kinds of shortcuts these guys take and doesn’t trust their work one bit.

On the 8th floor, the guild finds the guard assigned to this floor... brutalized by monsters, his armour rendered useless. They are ambushed by the same monsters that killed the guard, but manage to take them down. Then Barry examines the corpse. Like the other guard, this one has a partial map. Barry feels bad, but he leaves the map with the guard.

Also on the 8th floor is the Salamox’s lair. It takes some sneaking, but the group manages to infiltrate its nest and steal a stray feather. They return it to the Duchy and are rewarded handsomely. Fret cares more about the ingredient’s success as medicine, however, and urges Dubois to tell them right away if it works.

In the mean time, Fret intends to take the guild back into the labyrinth. They can’t just wait around for news that might not help them, after all. But Contra stops. Her hands shake. She still can’t stop thinking about Wulfgar and Hrothgar, about that dead guard, even that trap that snared her leg. Haven’t they done enough in the labyrinth? Haven’t they killed enough forest creatures? Can’t they stop? She turns to Travis, who didn’t want to do this in the first place. Surely he will convince the others. He gently takes her aside.

Thinking back on their lives before, he was never happy toiling in the gardens of the rich. Now he feels useful, even heroic at times. He was skeptical at first, but now he feels fulfilled. It is gruesome sometimes, yes, and certainly dangerous, but it’s work that means something. Contra agrees to go back into the labyrinth, but privately she wonders how much more of this she can take.

It is an uneventful journey to the 9th floor. Partway through, however, Contra hears a chirping. She follows it to a baby monster, clearly in distress. There is a lump in its throat, and it seems to be choking. The guild has fought grown-up versions of this thing, and one less monster would make the forest that much safer for them. Ossia prepares to finish the weakened beast, but Contra stops him. She massages the monster’s throat until the object is ejected. The little beast flees. Contra clings desperately to the feeling of having saved a life for once.

Later, on a trek that lasts past sundown, Frisson runs into a guard who isn’t doing much guarding; he’s asleep. He has a heavy money pouch, and it dangles temptingly... Ossia advocates for stealing it. They’ll definitely get away with it. Barry actually recognizes this particular guard, too, and he’s a real asshole... but Barry doesn’t want to stoop to his level. He asks Ossia to leave the guard’s money alone. Ossia shrugs. He doesn’t see what the big deal is, but he complies nevertheless.

On the tenth floor, Frisson comes to a door guarded by an intimidating older man holding two guns. He seems to have heard of Frisson, but the way he speaks of them suggests he is far from their biggest fan. He “suggests” that they turn around. Travis takes the man in cautiously, predicting a vicious fight, but Fret is oblivious and tries to brush the man off, saying that they’re definitely not stopping now. At that, the man introduces himself as Wilhelm and, at the same time, takes aim.

As Frisson prepares for a face-off, a woman appears, scolding Wilhelm for trying to start a fight. She calls herself Artelinde, of Guild Esbat. She tries to claim that Wilhelm was only concerned for their safety, as a terrible monster lies beyond the door. Ossia can see right through that; he could sense Wilhelm’s bloodlust, and something’s not right about this Artelinde girl, either. Nonetheless, she insists that the group first gets permission from the Duchy to proceed.

Back in town, Dubois confirms that he hired Esbat to guard the door. Previously, he tasked Esbat and other powerful guilds with the destruction of the beast beyond that door, but it revived days later. He urges caution if Guild Frisson intends to take on the Hellion.

Upon returning to the tenth floor, the group does not see Esbat anywhere. They are free to fight Hellion, which turns out to be a grotesque humanoid fire demon. They kill it and return to town to report to Dubois and receive their reward. Since it’s been a while, Fret asks for updates on the Duke’s health. Dubois shares that the fire plume wasn’t enough on its own. He has new information on a flower in the third stratum that may help. It seems the guards sent to retrieve these flowers haven’t been returning. While Barry wonders what happened to all those guards, and Ossia worries that they are being sent on a wild goose chase and there is no cure for the Duke, Fret eagerly accepts the mission, seeing only the guild’s fame if they succeed.

THIRD STRATUM: Frozen Grounds

The temperature drop on the first floor of the third stratum is sudden and severe. It would be easy to freeze to death. Barry wonders if that’s why the guards haven’t been returning...

When the guild shares their progress with the Dubois, he reveals that the Duke is offering nobility to those explorers who reach the top of the labyrinth... if they want it, of course. It’s worth pondering for Fret, although not for its own sake. Would being a Baron or Knight or something make him seem more notable as a musician?

On the 12th floor, the guild finds a guard, shivering violently. Barry’s theory gains credence. The guard explains that they’ve only been hunting for the flowers during the day, as it’s too dangerous at night, but they haven’t found any yet. Travis wonders how efficient they can even be when they’re reacting that poorly to the cold. He knows how much longer even a simple task can take when you’re freezing.

The group scouts out the floor a bit, but Contra has a nagging feeling that they won’t find the snow blooms either... Some terrifying monsters are napping throughout, sometimes blocking paths the group would like to take. The floor really would be more dangerous if they’re up and active at night.

They make their way through the floor until they are stopped a familiar voice. Artelinde appears and stands in front of the door to progress. She happily shares that there are no snow blooms further on, but Ossia senses something off about her; her cheer seems stiff somehow... Fret is frustrated. He tells her that they haven’t found any behind them either, but Artelinde insists that she’s correct. Fret’s fists bunch up, but before he can punch the girl, Contra speaks up with her theory: the flowers only bloom at night. They’ll have to come back after dark to spot them.

After resting up, the guild scours the 12th floor again, this time having to carefully avoid the monsters who now roam awake and hungry. Sure enough, they find beautiful glittering blooms, which they pick and take back to town. They hand the flowers over to Dubois, who disappears to report to his superior. Moments later, the princess of High Lagaard, Lady Gradriel, appears before the guild for the first time. Fret is floored, and is quick to kneel and ingratiate himself to her. Her favour would go a long way! Indeed, she is grateful for the help, but there is one more thing she needs to save her father, and that is the Holy Grail, said to be located in the floating castle. When the ingredients they’ve already found are mixed in the grail, any illness can be cured, supposedly. She begs the guild to find the grail and save her father, then flees tearfully. Most of the group is genuinely moved, but Ossia only sighs. He is even surer that there is no floating castle, there is no grail, and they are on nothing more than a wild goose chase. He can tell that no one else holds his opinion, however, so he keeps his mouth shut.

Nonetheless, if Frisson wishes to reach the floating castle, they must press on through the labyrinth. They return to where they were previously stopped by Artelinde, where she still waits. She cannot even feign enthusiasm this time. She asks them outright: will you give up and go home? Fret refuses outright. She doesn’t seem surprised. She shares a bit of the legend of the floating castle that Frisson hasn’t heard yet: that the ruler of the skies lives there, collecting the souls of those who die in the labyrinth... She says that if they want to proceed, she won’t stop them... yet. With that ominous last word, she disappears.

Frisson journeys on, making short work of the 13th floor. One floor up, they are stopped by Guild Esbat’s old gunner, his gaze as menacing as always. He warns the group not to go to the fifteenth floor, or else... Then he departs. Barry wonders aloud what Esbat’s deal is, as they seem intent on keeping other guilds from climbing too high. Fret doesn’t care what their reason is; they’re pissing him off!

On a trip back, Dubois shares that Frisson is a common topic of discussion among the guards. Fret is pleased; they’re getting famous! Barry feels weird about it. He never got along with the other guards, but now they’re following his exploits? And they don’t even seem to have clocked him as one of their own.

Deep into the 15th floor, the party is stopped again by Wilhelm, the Esbat gunner. Fret rolls his eyes and turns around to find another way, but they are blocked from behind by Artelinde. They’ve fallen into a trap. Artelinde speaks of a war magus who explored the labyrinth with her allies long ago, until she lost her life in the third stratum. Artelinde is overcome with emotion, so the old man continues for her, claiming that the ruler of the heavens gave that war magus eternal life... by turning her into a monster. Artelinde finishes: if Frisson continues, they will have to fight Esbat’s transformed friend, and she won’t allow that.

A fight ensues. Guild Esbat are tough, but there are only two of them; they stand no chance against a full party. Beaten down, they submit. Wilhelm switches tactics. Admitting that he can’t stop them, he asks them to find the floating castle, find its overlord, and kill him for his crimes, for transforming that war magus and who knows how many others. Then he leads Artelinde away, and the duo vanish. Contra thinks back to the stronger foes they’ve fought so far. Was the Hellion also...?

Frisson proceeds and comes to a great frozen lake. At the centre of it is a monster with various grotesque tentacles and appendages, but also the face of a woman. Contra’s heart falls. So this is Esbat’s beloved friend... The beast lets out a terrible, sad shriek. When it goes down, Travis cannot help but feel that perhaps they’ve done her a favour. At any rate, she is done. The fourth stratum awaits.

FOURTH STRATUM: Petal Bridge

The fourth stratum is filled with cherry blossoms in full bloom, pink petals falling and blowing in the wind. It is a striking sight. Not far into the stratum, the party comes upon a man with wings on his back. He seems to call upon his deity before flying off. Frisson is left shocked, awed, and confused. In all his time in the labyrinth, Barry has never seen or heard of anything like what he just saw.

The group returns to town to report what they saw immediately. Dubois hears the word “winged” and runs off to fetch Lady Gradriel. She is much calmer, and shares what she has read of them. According to ancient lore, they were created by the Overlord of the heavens and safeguard the entrance to the Heavenly Keep. There is a secret phrase that apparently works as a password to allow access, and Gradriel teaches it to the party. Travis commits it to memory. Ossia is quiet. He didn’t think the castle really existed, but if these winged folk are real, then maybe...

They proceed through the stratum, making it to the end of the 18th floor. As they are about to open the door there, they hear a familiar voice before seeing the winged man swoop down in front of them. He gives them the once over, then claims that they are unfit to use the Grail of Kings and commands them to turn back. Ever quick to anger, Fret docks an arrow in his bow, but Travis steps up before he can let loose. Travis repeats Gradriel’s phrase, the ancient pact that asks for guidance in mankind’s return to the heavens. The winged one acknowledges this and flies off, leaving the party free to proceed.

Before going further, they report back once more. Dubois shares that Gradriel has told her father about Frisson. Fret can barely contain his glee. The most powerful man in the land knows who he is! Of course, it will mean nothing if they can’t save his life.

Even outside the palace, there seems to be a lot more buzz around the guild’s exploits lately. Contra proposes that maybe they could even stop now, could shift back to music and be fine. Ossia contradicts her. He believes that, if they give up now, they will be something worse than unnoticed: hated. They have no choice but to finish what they started.

On the 20th floor, another door and another winged one blocking the way. This time the one blocking the path seems to be of a higher status, going by the way he dresses and holds himself. He seems to require a certain item before they group can proceed. Figuring Dubois may know about it, Frisson returns to town.

Dubois confirms that the one they met was the chief of the winged ones, but goes to fetch Gradriel when the group asks about the required artifact. She agrees to part with the keepsake, on one condition: the group agrees, once and for all, to find the Holy Grail. It’s a no-brainer, of course. Frisson is locked in at this point. On their way out, Dubois gives them a warning that the winged ones may be dangerous. After all, they are said to be the ones who bring people to the floating castle. Dubois does not want that to happen to anyone else.

Late at night, while the guild is preparing for the next day’s venture, they are approached by Abigail, the girl who runs the shop. She has a favour to ask, though she is hesitant to do so. Apparently, she head from another guild that they defeated a monster, but left its baby behind. Abigail wants Frisson to find it and feed it, so it doesn’t die without its mother. It is a ludicrous offer on the face of it, and Ossia protests. They’re killing monsters all the time out there. Letting a baby die now is easier than killing an adult later. Furthermore, they already spared one such baby earlier on and don’t need to do so again. Contra protests, that even if it isn’t logical, she can’t just let a baby die. Barry and Travis side with Contra, although Barry from the practical standpoint: they’ve been asked a favour, and would do well to gain Abigail’s regard by completing it. Ossia grumbles, but he is outnumbered, so he lets it go.

They find the spot Abigail mentioned on the 19th floor. There sits a small bird, all alone. Ossia challenges the party again: this is their last chance to simply leave it be. Contra ignores him and offers food to the monster chick. It eats happily and chirps graciously. It seems to be looking healthier already. Despite his protestations, Ossia can’t help but feel his heart warm a little at the sight. Maybe they will have to deal with it later, them or some other explorer, but for now it feels good to have done something human. He suggests leaving the rest of the food for it so it can feed itself, and the group moves on.

Frisson returns to the 20th floor, where the chief of the winged ones waits. Fret hands him the artifact. His demeanour changes immediately; he becomes almost gleeful. He asks for the group’s names, but Fret insists that there’s no need to remember each of their names as individuals. He can just call them Frisson.

In turn, the chief introduces himself as Canaan. He says that it is his duty to guide Frisson to the path to the heavens... but it is not so simple a task. The way is blocked by a winged beast. It is up to Frisson to defeat it if they want to continue. Canaan flies away, leaving Frisson to journey on alone.

The guild makes their way through the 20th floor, fighting off fiercer monsters than they’ve seen up to this point. At a door deeper in, Canaan reappears. He seems impressed that they were able to survive to this point, and offers to tell the group whatever they want to know. Travis is curious about what happens to the people who get carried up to the floating castle, but Canaan doesn’t know. Their orders are to fly the wounded to the entrance, but they are not allowed inside. They were created by the ruler and do as they are told, that is all. Ossia asks about the ‘winged beast’ mentioned previously. The Queen of the Skies, which lies just beyond, has massacred any winged folk who have attempted to make their way to the palace in recent years. Canaan cautions the guild to be careful in their battle, then flies off once more.

They enter the area where the Queen lies in wait. At first they don’t hear anything, but then they notice a beautiful song coming from above. It seems beautiful at first, anyway, but something seems off about it to Fret... He is about to share this observation when he notices that Barry, Travis, and Contra are utterly enchanted by the song! Ossia is on the same page, at least: he knows a siren song when he hears one. Fret breaks out his lute and sings a song of his own, which breaks his friends out of their spell. With that, the Queen of the Skies swoops down in a rage, but now that she doesn’t have a hold on anyone, the fight is easy. Frisson take her down.

Canaan returns. Shocked at the power of mere humans, he grants them passage beyond, to the heavens above. The party step into a glowing pillar of light, and are whisked away.

FIFTH STRATUM AND BEYOND: Heavenly Keep

Frisson find themselves on a bridge high in the sky, connected to a great golden fortress. As they approach the entrance to the keep, they are greeted by a haughty voice calling itself the Overlord. Fret, hyped up on his recent victory, demands to know who is speaking. The Overlord claims to be the one humans refer to as a god, for he is one who can grant eternal life. He invites the party to come to him, to claim their destinies and their immortality.

The offer is tempting for Fret. After all, isn’t that what they want? To have their music be known forever? Ossia reminds Fret that this Overlord’s idea of immortality seems to be turning people into regenerating monsters. Does he want to be the next Scylla? “Of course not,” he says, but in the back of his mind he thinks, at least the Queen of the Skies could still sing...

Back in town, Frisson share with those who are invested in their exploits that they have finally reached the floating castle. They receive much praise, with the bartender wanting to hear all about it. Dubois says he will remember their accomplishments to his grave.

On the 22nd floor, the group hears the Overlord’s voice again. He muses on death, and his own attempts to defy death. He states that Frisson will be put to use in service of that goal. A shiver runs down Contra’s spine.

On another return trip, Dubois notices that Fret’s shirt is torn, and immediately sends someone to fetch him a new one. Getting free stuff is a key part of being a celebrity, so Fret is pleased as punch.

Back in the labyrinth, on the 23rd floor, the Overlord speaks once more. He speaks again of the terror of death, and wonders at why the group do not seem keen to gain immortality. But the Overlord will prove his power to them, as one who has been granted eternal life guards this very floor: the Colossus! By this point, everyone in Frisson knows what that means, and they are not amused. They brace for a tough fight.

An army of mechanical monsters stands in the way, but the guild maneuvers past them all and into the chamber where the Colossus awaits. It is a towering beast, a many-horned behemoth. On sight, it bats Travis away, hitting him so hard he goes flying. This may be the Overlord’s greatest warrior. With Barry’s help, Travis gets back up, and so begins an arduous fight. They play defensively, slowly chipping away at the Colossus until it finally goes down.

The Overlord speaks. He is left with no choice but to face the party himselff. One way or another, he says, they will be granted eternal life...

Determined after having made it this far, Frisson climbs to the 25th floor and passes a particularly ornate door. The Overlord speaks once more, explaining that the Heavenly Keep was created as an ark to escape a calamity on the planet’s surface, long, long ago. The Earth became so contaminated that there was no way for its people to return as they were. That is when the Overlord began his research with the Grail of Kings, but it has a flaw in that it warps anyone who is granted immortality with it. The Overlord insists that he must continue his experiments, for the sake of mankind’s future. Barry is confused. He tries to tell the Overlord that mankind is doing just fine now, whatever happened in the past, but the supreme being is not willing to listen. He descends in an egg-shaped mechanical body and begins his attack.

Travis’s katana hits hard, and he slices the egg open. The Overlord backs off and shakily pleads, offering eternal life one last time in exchange for forgetting about the Grail. Everyone looks at Fret, wondering what he will say, but he refuses. The people of High Lagaard already treat him like a hero. He doesn’t need the Overlord’s help to make a lasting impression!

The Overlord retreats through a hole in the ceiling. The party finds a way up and follows him, but the egg is nowhere to be found. Instead, they see the Overlord’s true form, a towering mechanical warrior. A fierce fighter, to be sure, but no match for our band of heroes. The Overlord’s mechanical suit breaks up into a thousand beams of light, and then is gone.

Frisson return to town, victorious. They hand the Grail over to Gradriel, who uses it to return her father to full health. The Duke offers nobility to every member of the guild, but none of them want it. They’ve already gotten what they were looking for.

After only a few days of recovery, they begin their musical career anew. They play in High Lagaard, then travel the land, going to places even Fret has never been before. They always receive a good deal of attention as the heroes who saved High Lagaard. A lot of the attendees of their concerts are there for that reason alone, at least at first, but over time that particular brand of admirers gets bored, leaving only their true fans, of which there are plenty, more than enough to sustain a musical career.

In interviews, Barry speaks of his past career as a guard, and how much more fulfilled he feels now as a full-time musician. Travis and Contra get married and adopt a dog, who they name Wulfgar; Wulfy follows them on all their tours. Ossia becomes the band’s moral centre, ensuring that they never let their fame go to their heads and that they are always honest and fair to their fans. Fret has accomplished his dream of becoming a musician people will remember for generations, but that’s not the most satisfying part. As it turns out, what he wanted most of all was to play music again with his friends.

#my stuff #etrian odyssey #etrian odyssey ii #another one down!#since EOI's party was all kids I wanted to go with all adults this time #i liked this party and had fun writing about them #and i love EOII aesthetically. those first four strata are mwah #but there are so many bad game design decisions... i think EOII is the weakest EO i've played #the quest design! ugh i just stopped doing quests at a certain point #yeah i think there is little reason to play this over Untold #not the case for EOI. def the case here.#anyway i'm already thinking about my EOIII party BUT #i'm trying to finish some other games before the year ends so... we'll see what happens #i'm trying to resist but my willpower is so so weak...

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