#the duality of enjoying the process but also wanting to move on

[krowfaced]

Me: I want to render the shit out of this, hell yeah!

Me: //verge of tears why is it never finished

[ivesambrose]

𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟒 𝐌𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐞𝐬 🥂

1. 2. 3.

Do I dare ask how 2023 has been for y'all?

Pick the image you feel the most pull towards or have been seeing around you a lot, if you feel drawn towards multiple, so be it. 🤍

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𝓟𝓲𝓬𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮 1

Your central theme is rising from the ashes. You're in the process of the most intense metamorphosis yet. A new dawn, a new day, a new life.

You'll feel empowered, passionate and obsessive about your pursuits. You'll allow the old skin to be ripped off of you and you'll no longer be scared to be you.

This year brings you connections, admires, collaborations, unions both in personal and proffesional life.

There's a certain duality in you that you haven't explored yet, but you will in the coming months.

You'll have good health for the most part compared to the previous year. Your family will be taken care of. The hope and assurance you may have lacked from them will come through. It will feel warm and refreshing. (Goes for chosen family too)

Romantically, you may be focused on your career or just living your life a lot. But someone might want to build a legacy or long term relationship with you.

If you're already coupled, the focus goes to building what you have and looking after domestic affairs and see things bloom.

Proffesionally, you will have your most successful and blessed year. Money shouldn't be a problem and even if it seems like it, your needs will always be met and you'll still have more.

Some of you might enjoy ghe fruits of your labour extensively. This goes for the ones who work solo or run their own business etc

Academically, you might feel a bit disinterested. Might move out from your home or change subjects. Take up something completely new. Might face your fears and push through but make it a point to follow your inner calling for the most part.

Themes centered around relationships and partnerships are significant this year as well opportunities coming out of the blue that call you to heed your intuition and step out of your comfort zone or limiting mindsets, that will inevitably lead to travel, progress and new experiences.

Make the best of this year, it'll feel like you're finally on the journey you've been preparing yourself for all this time.

𝓟𝓲𝓬𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮 2

Your central theme is using your emotions as your guiding force, using it as fuel and not seeing it as weakness. Quieting your mind so you can listen to your instincts more. Healing from things you don't speak of, that you've felt have persistently held you back from your potential and finally taking the lead. You'll feel like the main character in your life finally, instead of seeing everything through the lens of a side character no one remembers.

You'll feel motivated to follow what makes your heart happy. You may be faced with choices a lot this year, a lot of this or that in several aspects of your life. Trust yourself to make the right decisions.

You'll be learning about your mind and body this year, so incase you go through ups and downs in your health you'll be able to manage it but also guide others too.

Romantically, you might as well get your happy ending. I see that you're mostly focused on the complete picture. Not bothered with what is going on in between too much. So you'll get what you're manifesting eitherway.

Proffesionally, a rebirth or evolution will take place. Something new that will grow overtime. You'll be driven about it. So success will be imminent.

Success in academics as well, feeling proud of your achievements.

Themes around revolution, personal development, healing generational trauma, humanitarism, technology as well being open to the unknown will also be prevalent this year.

Learn to make amends and embrace the breakthroughs this year has to offer you.

𝓟𝓲𝓬𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓮 3

Your central theme is related to wealth, inheritance, change of lifestyle, receiving help, building a legacy and feeling more secure. Some of you will see a success or change they did not see coming, it was hidden for the longest time.

Some of you may even be leaving poverty behind for a more financially secure life.

You'll find yourself blooming, physically especially. A glow up in your looks and quality of being is going to be imminent. Focus on health, beauty, food, routine etc as well. A lot of you will be experiencing vivid dreams, strange synchronicities etc too will be learning about esoteric subjects, occult or the subconscious mind a lot. You'll also be receiving success and recognition or you might be building your steps towards it that will eventually pay off in the long run.

You'll feel like this old self or image of you has died. You may even mourn it for some time but will feel more powerful, confident and self assured once you're past that.

Romantically, you'll be feeling desirable and might attract a lot of suitors. Your self concept will improve exponentially, so will your standards. So nothing less than what you want. Your intuition will be at all time high. Fear no one and nothing. Some of you might also be moving to a new house too or might end up owning something in your name.

Proffesionally, although you might deal with competition you won't be too worried. You know your skills, you'll have your resources, your work will speak for it self and you will stand out.

Friendship, community, discoveries and gains are also some of the themes surrounding you this year.

Let your imagination create for you. You'll soon realize there's so much power in allowing yourself to receive what you desire by simply being instead of doing too much.

[neptunes-sol-angel]

Channeling from my inner cobra 🐍 to tell you guys something from your past that needs to shed. Pick the gif(s) that you feel drawn to the most, and then scroll for their corresponding message. Enjoy and STREAM COBRA!! 🐍

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Pile One 🐍

There's a situation with a failed outcome that you're still clinging on to, that makes you either not want to try anything new or see how just because something that made you flop, doesn't mean that you have to stay down. This failure could have brought you some embarrassment or put you in a mood to where you don't want to feel seen, but you need to shed this part of the past because making mistakes or falling short in something doesn't mean that it can take away your confidence or right to try again. We fail to see now what we can do different, whether it is to start anew, or find a way to elevate from where we are. All you have to do is put one foot out there make your first step, but it doesn't mean that you have to obtain immediate perfection, you can do it slow and take your time, the goal is however tempo that you're moving in, it's beneficial for you to go forward than backwards, even if you have to take some breaks. Practice saying affirmations like "I am safe to trust in myself and the process".

Pile Two 🐍

Something from your past that is affecting your present, is how you soothe yourself from emotional pain with superficial pleasures or things that make you fake your happiness. Surrounding yourself with depthless connections that aren't serving you anymore is only going to make your sadness worse when have those moments where you realize that certain things are just not providing you with what you need. To know what makes you feel authentic joy, you need to utilize duality by not holding back in feeling out your sadness. I also have this feeling that you guys could be in a phase where you're like a caterpillar in its cocoon. You're transforming, and this person that you see in the mirror is someone you can't recognize, and I know it scares you. Not only because of what you're growing into, but because deep down you know that eventually you have to let go of what and who you're outgrowing. See the value in acknowledging that being at your lowest point is how you'll get back to the top.

Pile Three 🐍

Trying to have your mind and body adjust to a peaceful environment can be frustrating when it doesn't know yet that you're somewhere safe. You don't have to put so much pressure on to yourself because it's what you were used to in the past, that person that always put you down as if you couldn't do anything right, is not there anymore. Those people that spiked your anxiety and had you in survival mode. They can't harm you anymore. But it's even those their presence is absent, there's this phantom that possesses your mind and makes you so harsh with yourself that it's hard to believe that they've really truly left. You need to give yourself your flowers for the challenges you've prevailed over and the leaps of faith you took despite the people that told you that you couldn't. Don't stop there, continue to take those chances in the things that you want to do for yourself and others. Recognize both your strength and your capacity to also be soft with yourself. Relax more, release the tension that makes you feel like you can't do anything other than be productive.

[astrojulia]

All about Gemini

As people I know, I have family, co-workers, crushes... There's quite a lot on the list. In my humble life before astrology, I swore they were cardinals as Gemini always approached me first and yes, it took a while to record that no, they were mutable LOL. In my experience with these people, they are people with active lives who are doing several things at the same time and who like to talk (and gossip too, but that's ok, where I live it's cultural 😆). However, they are not people I've had contact with for a long time and we always end up moving away as time goes by.

As a general energy, I cannot escape it, but it is that of duality. The angel and the devil, death and life, the yes and the no... Even If in my list of colors of the signs (which are made with the intention of bringing the strength of the sign in your life), I see Gemini like black and white. Simple but effective, it transmits its message effectively. This duality also reminds me of the air itself... we know that it exists and it is proven that it exists... but it is not visible, or smellable (you smell something, but not the AIR itself)... I say this because the occult sciences are ridiculed because they have no concrete proof... and neither is the air. This lack of proof, but still existing, reminds me a lot of Gemini (Am I spacing out 😆).

As always, I need to say that when I write in the post, I need to put what the experts and the most important astrological community say and think, because I am responsible for every word I write, but here I always say that it is just my point of view, my studies and my evolution, because I’m the type of person who always wants to be better the next day. So let me tell you this: for me there is no underdeveloped aspect! For me, the underdeveloped part will always be our “Shadow self” that will appear when we most need to defend ourselves! Underdeveloped is our deepest instinct and we need to look at it as a Digivolution and not a Pokémon evolution (nerd references!!!).

Gemini is known for their agility and quick-wittedness. They are always on their toes and ready to respond to any situation that comes their way. This is a valuable trait to have in a fast-paced, ever-changing world where quick thinking and flexibility are necessary for success. However, their constant alertness can also lead to impatience. Gemini can sometimes become restless and easily bored, always looking for the next exciting thing to capture their attention. This impatience can cause them to jump from one thing to another without fully committing or seeing things through to completion. Exhausting their minds and bodies in this process.

It says it's okay to have multiple talents. You know, in the world of work there are two ends (just like Gemini LOL), the one that says you need to be an expert in one area and the other that you need to know a little bit about everything... I won't go into detail on this subject, but when they say that Gemini never goes deep into anything but does a little bit of everything I don't see it as a negative aspect, their versatility is their individuality, but I won't sugarcoat them, they can be scattered.

They don't take things to heart, as they are more emotionally cool and mental, I'm not saying they don't feel because everyone has feelings and I already made a huge post talking about it... But they take everything more to the "professional" side " of things and not for the emotional and that makes them show in the exterior an aloof and uninvolved personality.

As I mentioned earlier, those born under the Gemini zodiac sign are often friendly and sociable individuals. They have a natural ability to connect with others and are often drawn to situations where they can engage in conversation and communication. However, communication does not only refer to verbal exchanges; it encompasses all forms of expression, including art. Their social nature makes them a social butterfly, and they often enjoy interacting with a wide range of people. They are incessantly talkative and may find it difficult to remain quiet for too long. Despite their talkative nature, Gemini individuals also have a strong listening ear. They are often interested in hearing what others have to say and may have a knack for putting people at ease in social situations… because you know, they are the Mutable Air… they’re receivers.

It can be said that the great love of this sign is freedom, they are an air sign, which has no barriers, and this gives them a natural inclination to explore and move around freely without feeling restricted. Their ruling planet, Mercury, also adds to their need for movement, communication, and change. While this free-spirited nature can be an asset in many ways, it can also make it difficult for Gemini to settle down and commit to a specific path or person. They may find it challenging to stay in one place or focus on a single task for an extended period, preferring instead to keep their options open and maintain their sense of freedom.

Geminis are known for their broad range of interests and their natural curiosity, which often leads them to acquire a vast amount of knowledge on various subjects. They have a sharp intellect and a natural gift for communication, which allows them to express their ideas and thoughts articulately and confidently. However, their wide range of knowledge can sometimes make them appear superficially opinionated. They may hold strong opinions on a variety of subjects, but their opinions may lack depth or nuance due to their tendency to skim the surface of a topic rather than delving deeply into it.

And last but not least, they’ve a light-hearted nature and the ability to infuse a sense of fun and playfulness into many aspects of their lives. They have a youthful energy and a natural curiosity that can make them seem lively and spontaneous, yet this lightheartedness can sometimes border on silliness and immaturity. They may have a tendency to engage in childish or frivolous behavior, which can sometimes make it difficult for others to take them seriously or view them as mature individuals.

So, in other words:

At their best, Gemini can be:

Intelligent: Geminis are naturally curious and have a thirst for knowledge. They are quick learners and have the ability to absorb information rapidly, making them knowledgeable and well-informed individuals.

Versatile: Geminis are adaptable and can easily switch between different roles and situations. They can be chameleons and fit into any environment, which makes them great team players.

Sociable: Geminis are outgoing and love socializing with others. They have an innate ability to connect with people from all walks of life, making them great communicators and excellent networkers.

Humorous: Geminis have a great sense of humor and can always make others laugh. They have a quick wit and can find humor in any situation, which makes them a joy to be around.

Resourceful: Geminis are skilled at manipulating the system to benefit themselves and others. They have a knack for finding creative solutions to problems and can think outside the box when faced with challenges.

At their worst, Gemini can be:

Deceptive: Geminis have a reputation for being two-faced and dishonest. They can present different personas to different people, making it hard to know who they truly are.

Treacherous: Geminis can be disloyal and untrustworthy. They may betray others' trust and use their knowledge and connections for personal gain.

Loud: Geminis can be talkative and sometimes dominate conversations, making it hard for others to get a word in edgewise.

Manipulative: Geminis may act nice to people they normally ignore just before asking for a favor. They can use their charm and wit to manipulate situations and people to their advantage.

Scheming: Geminis may constantly scheme and plan, even if it means backstabbing others. They may talk behind people's backs and use gossip to manipulate others.

As the third sign, Gemini speaks of our first desire to get involved with the other. The first two signs of the zodiac, Aries and Taurus, are associated with individuality, self-discovery, and building a foundation. It is with Gemini that we realize that we are not alone and that we need to express ourselves as well as understand, that's why he is also changeable, because first we listen and join a group and then start to put our own ideas.

We already made it clear that Gemini is the mutable air sign with all the communication parts already said LOL. But I see the air element of Gemini as the thirst to learn, to listen to improve, to also question all the world's problems because they are the ones who receive the information and need to improve it for the next ones.

Gemini individuals are known for their intense curiosity, but this curiosity can sometimes lead to distraction and a lack of focus, which can in turn create feelings of anxiety and self-doubt. However, the key to overcoming these challenges lies in embracing the symbolism of your opposite sign, Sagittarius. By focusing your concentration and attention on your greater goals, and by integrating with the energy of Sagittarius, you can transform any sense of dispersion into a powerful union of forces that will help you achieve your objectives and find meaning in your pursuits, ultimately leading to a reduction in anxiety.

As the ruling planet of Gemini, Mercury's influence can be seen in a number of ways. First and foremost, Mercury inspires Gemini's innate curiosity and love of learning. Those born under this sign are often quick-witted and able to absorb and process new information rapidly. They enjoy exploring new ideas and engaging in intellectual discourse, which can help to satisfy their need for mental stimulation. Mercury is also associated with communication, and as such, Gemini individuals are known for their excellent communication skills. They are often great at expressing themselves verbally and in writing, and are skilled at adapting their communication style to suit a range of different situations and audiences. In addition to these qualities, Mercury is also linked to reason and rationality. This can manifest in Gemini individuals as a tendency towards logical thinking and a desire for clarity and order in their thoughts and ideas. They are often able to see things from multiple perspectives, and are skilled at finding solutions to complex problems.

Now the association with the tarot, the suit of swords is a suit that in my view is kill or die, there is no middle ground, this energy of yes or no is Gemini. As The Magician, you can see all the duality he has, he can be alone as well as have an audience in front of him, he is surrounded by red roses (feminine) as well as white lilies (masculine) and his robes follow the same colors, it connects the high, the divine with the material and all these opposites connect it with a sign. As for The Lovers, I can already say that in the Marseille tarot and in the Rider-Smith-Waite tarot these card meanings are totally different and that is totally Gemini for me, but it talks about choices as well as people, again, the yes and the no.

Gemini men are often seen as charming and charismatic, with a quick wit and a love of conversation. They tend to be outgoing and sociable, and are often skilled at making connections with others. They may have a tendency to be restless or easily bored, and may enjoy pursuing multiple interests or hobbies at once.

Gemini women, on the other hand, may be seen as intelligent and independent, with a strong sense of curiosity and a desire for intellectual stimulation. They may be skilled at communication and may enjoy engaging in debates or discussions with others. Like Gemini men, they may also have a tendency to be restless or easily bored, and may benefit from pursuing multiple interests or hobbies simultaneously.

Sources:

“Os astros sempre nos Acompanham” by Claudia Lisboa

“DEPTH ASTROLOGY: An Astrological Handbook”, Volume 1, by Gargatholil

Servant of the Fates on tumblr

PSD by wildfireresources on deviantart

[cupidlovesastro]

Hi ! I hope you’re well, I wanted to know your thoughts about my big 3 : - Libra sun in 4th house (6.5 deg), Gemini moon in the 12th house( 9.7 deg) and Cancer rising (11.8 deg). Thank you and have a good day !

hi wonderful! libra sun can show that you care a lot about love, aesthetics, relationships, harmony, skincare, and beauty! on the downside you may be on the shallow side and might be a bit gossipy. having libra in the 4th house can show that who ever you end up settling with, you would love to have a family with them! also, you may be the peacemaker in your family. family members might come to you for issues and problems because they know you can resolve them or make them see things in a level headed way. having this in the 6th degree can you may be critical and/or analytical about your looks or others looks. you can be critical of your family as well, but you try to keep your criticism to yourself. you may also have. a family member, specifically a mother, that you enjoy gossiping with, shopping with, etc.

gemini moon can show that you process your emotions through logic and words. if you have a hard time saying your feelings, try journaling as a form of coping and comfort! you words might genuinely move people or you could have a very hard time communicating with those around you. for example, if someone ask’s you why you’re sad, you almost don’t know how to put your feelings into words. you might be prone to pushing your emotions away as well because you’re not sure how to feel them or they’re too much. you have this in 12th house. 12th house is a water sign house (pisces) and moon is ruled by cancer, a water sign, so your emotions could be super intense. you might find yourself crying over small things, or bursting into emotions at random times. poetry, books, or pieces of literature could really pull your heart strings and get you emotional! also you might have this duality to your emotional state. like one moment your fun, and playful, then the next moment your really sad and upset. this is in the 9th degree which means cultural, religious, or lawful things can make you emotional. for example, if you see a culture practicing a traditional, it could make you emotional, or if you have religious trauma, you can get painful flash backs. you also could find a way of coping through traveling or just running away. like when things get tough, you wish you could just go far away from the situation.

cancer rising means you can have round features like your face shape, body. shape, eye shape, etc. you likely have sleepy/dreaming looking eyes with lashes on the longer side and bigger lips. you also could have bigger breast, chest, or rib cage compared to most. with this being in the 11th degree, you could have features that others would call “unique”, in a beautiful way ofc! people could also find your ankle/ feet attractive. people first impressions of you are emotional, nurturing, caring, loving, motherly, intuitive, and soft. people could also see you as friendly, sociable, and caring for humanity. you could be on the more reserved side and keep to yourself often. people might see you on social media the most , or their first impressions of you could’ve been from social media. it also could’ve been from a family member. like someone in your family could’ve shown a picture or video of you to someone else!

i hope this helps you!!🩷✨

[jaybug-jabbers]

I have moved to a new place, which means going through some very, very old boxes of mine. Here's some running commetary I did for some of it on Twitter

Photo 1: When I was a little lass, I used to buy these chapsticks called Lipsmackers. They came in a zillion different flavors. I used to bite them like candy. To be fair they really, really marketed them as if they were candy. They made many of the caps with a hole in them so you could wear the chapstick on a necklace chain for some reason (which I did).

Why do I still have them? Well when I got older and stopped eating these things, I still liked to use them like a normal human, but also just to smell them, they were very nice smelling. They. Do Not smell nice anymore but that is to be expected. It's been a while.

Anyway that's a very weird product from the past, the joy of collecting all the flavors and wearing them on a necklace was just as much a part of the process as actually using them, they made every single one a unique color and I think that was to appeal to Collectors. Like I got legit so excited when I went to the store and saw New flavors. And the glittery-colored ones were like cracking open a pack of cards to find a Foil, lol

Also, I discovered my Chocolate Milk chapstick has the last name of my childhood best friend in pernament marker, I fucking borrowed her chapstick and never gave it back, which is hilarious to me

Dr Pepper was the best flavor, for the record.

Photo 2: So while I was reminiscing about lip gloss, I discovered the company STILL EXISTS (I assumed they were long dead, as many fads of the 90s go). So I bought a new pack for old time's sake! They're . . . not as good smelling or as tasty as I remember them being, but they probably have changed the formula in the time span of a couple decades, to be fair.

Photo 3-4: I just wanted to say this is peak cell phone design and I miss it. I got to play Snakebar, feel like I was using a Star Trek TOS communicator, I didn't have the incredibly depressing Entire Internet with me 24/7, it actually fits into even women's pockets, it has physical buttons, I see no downsides here.

Photo 5-6: A selection of some of my Littlest Pet Shop collection from when I was a kiddo. They are vastly superior to modern Littlest Pet Shop toys, and it saddens me that kids won't get to enjoy sets like these anymore. Not only do these things actually look like animals, but the attention to detail is incredible and they are functional toys. The frogs can 'leap' with a catapault. The mice can navigate a maze with a cheese that has a magnet in it. The chamelion changes color in warm water. They all did things. And they all came with accessories (food, brushes, cat litter boxes, etc) and playsets.

Photo 7: Typical box of toys from my youth: Dinosaurs dragons bugs monster trucks lizards roaarrrrr oh also a polly pocket, Iguess. This was the duality of a tomgirl who also happened to like Very Small Cute Things. So pretty much my toys were either typical "boy's toys" or they were Cute and Small (Littlest Pet Shop, My Little Pony, Polly Pocket, etc). I didn't like dolls except I did some have Barbies as a VERY tiny tot, but it was because I loved Barbie's Tiny Plastic accessories (tiny plastic shoes, food, whatever) more than the actual dolls, lol

Photo 8: Holy shit you guys I loved Giga Pets so much as a kid. This is a selection of some of them. (Well actually one of the ones in the photo is a Nano Pet) Giga Pets were a very popular spinoff of the Tamagotchi craze. Sadly these Giga Pets have sat too long in storage and their screens are pretty much fried, despite the fact that they otherwise seem functional; but it won't do much good if I can't see them properly. (If I tilt the screen at a really intense angle I can make out the display sometimes) I liked Giga Pets more than Tamagotchi because the Giga Pets had way more features and interesting things to do, as well as a wide selection of animal types. Sadly they are no longer in production.

Fun story, the pink Giga Pet in that photo is a Koala. I kept one alive for 100 consecutive days one time. That's an incredibly long time for a Giga Pet. Once he turned 100, we had a birthday party for him with a cake and everything. Not long after that, he died because the batteries got too low. I felt very sad when he departed.

I used to wear these things on a chain around my neck and went everywhere with them. So I had like 3 or 4 of these things hanging off me quite a lot. Again, I was pretty intense with my hyperfixations even as a kid, and I had a strong Collector sort of craving. I had Digimon as well, btw! I enjoyed the battle aspect to them, as primitive as it was. I wonder where the rest of my virtual pet stash is.

Photo 9: The first home computer our family had, the reliable little Macintosh SE. SOMEHOW, when I got this thing out of storage and flipped the switch, it fucking booted up without any problems. I can't tell you how intensely wild that is, this thing is incredibly old and so many things can go wrong with its parts at this age.

A lot of fond memories with this thing. I spent a LOT of time with Hypercard, making my own stacks and games. Played a lot of the original Manhole too. I know for a lot of folks, their first home computer was an Atari, but I grew up with Macs. Back then they were actually wonderful machines, though modern Mac products now leave much to be desired.

That's all for now for the Nostalgia hype.

[jonathankatwhatever]

It’s 14 Mar 2024. Everything I looked at yesterday seemed approachable. Example: both T-duality and S-duality make sense. The latter is really on point because we generate the equivalence of two theories. The concept of duality is a bit more obvious in the former. Example is CM1 generates the inversion relationship which powers the interchange of information. I say powers because it steps over, like when I’m hopping over tree roots without falling, I hop over them without examining them individually but rather I view solutions to the problem, which is making my way forward without hurting myself but also performing well in the enclosing activity, which is an abstract Thing moving over ground, changing itself with its position, in response to efforts, etc. All of this models and maps because we construct gsSpace.

That came out because I was drawn to look at a tall thin blonde having sex. How blunt can the connections be? It’s like here, here’s an image that fits close enough for you to see something in her, when it’s that kind of connection I’m working on. Example is that the edges of the Mandelbrot set literally generate the Fibonacci sequence out of higher dimensions, which means we’re asserting that divergence is into higher dimensions, and that this occurs at a specific location.

And the M set image is a circle or disk warped so the divisions all locate where the bulbs are. That seems very straight forward. Oh, the example includes the idea that this is 1Space: adding the numerators and denominators of fractions doesn’t work in 0Space, but it literally locates the bulbs attached to the main object.

Is divergence actually into higher dimensions? Or is it out of these dimensions? What we see is the emergence of actual points within the complex plane, which I think of as collapsed into and expanded out of szK becoming the imaginary axis and xyK becoming the real axis. We used to describe that as a twist in which sK and zK rotate out of sight,thus revealing what that line, what those lines generate in that moment of that contraction to expansion and so on gs process. We can now answer why this occurs: because it counts in 1Space. Why does it count in 1Space? See Mission Storyline. That represents directionality in the creation process of gsSpace.

That’s pretty blunt. Didn’t think I could get it down to a sentence. Directionality in the creation of gsSpace. You gots your heaven over here, and yer hell over here.

Answers one thing which has always bothered me, that works alone can’t get you into heaven, that it requires grace. Well, obviously, given that grace is the word for the solution in which the 1-0-1 matches the 0-1-0 , et voilá, it’s a bunny. Another version of the statement of incompleteness, because this judgement can only be applied from elsewhere, and that is not sleight of hand, for that occurs in 0Space and this transition is to and from 1Space.

That’s a pretty decent answer then, that this process shows not only what coalesces but all of the cycles occurring which can be assigned in some way to count or run processes. That’s influenced by my incessant and yet painful efforts to work on movement. Every time I reach a spot I hope I can stay at so I can relax and enjoy, it’s press on to the next. I don’t want to break again, but I both need the maintenance effort and I see the results. The one I’m having trouble with is my nose seems different. It’s shaped better from all the contractive muscle work, which has really been focused on opening my sinuses, on breathing through my nose, which requires maximum contraction to open the passages as much as a I can. It’s weird. But maybe not as weird as the spots on my face clearing up. Stress change, I suppose, and here’s an example of where statistics can be found: as I started to relax, I started to put effort into appearance and began to rub Vaseline in every day. So the relaxation motivated a routine which applied care to the affected area, and that means only through iterations with others could I find out whether it’s the Vaseline plus the stress release or just one or neither. A simple duality. Pathways. This happens in gsSpace, to the extent that it’s an Actuality, meaning those patches have faded (can’t say disappeared because odds are they are in the background), and I’m seeing that well, versus it’s mostly in my head.

But that’s a lesson of the M set: a small change, like a tiny alteration in the angle of the nose along a short path changes my perception of my face drastically. Acceptance and rejection, a yes or no judgement, is within or without, which of course is true because this is for Things in the M-set form.

I need to go running. I’m entirely blown away by the quality of this work.

[bonickhausen]

I AM MY OWN PROFILER

"Although the word "optimization" shares the same root as "optimal", it is rare for the process of optimization to produce a truly optimal system." hello again!

this year has been good so far. many good things have happened up until this point and i feel like a healthier person. i feel like i've gotten better at identifying problems within me and sorting them out. i'm trying to be analytical when looking at myself and i feel like it's paying off. i turn 29 this year! took me 29 years to learn not to freak the fuck out with myself.

i'm trying to take care of myself so that i can survive whatever comes next. i've been listening to my body more and i've been giving myself some rest so that i can do what has to be done with happiness and energy. balance- balance is the word and it's been jumping around in my head for a while now, as cheesy as it may sound, yes, balance really is the key for so much in life.

ironically, it seems like duality has turned into a recurring theme for me: i see duality in so much. i see duality in me. in how i am- in how my acts and mannerisms often resemble my mom or dad's, so so much. in how i see life: balancing between the creator me and the person me. in my faults. in my thoughts and in my dreams and in my possibilities. i am two and i am a mediator.

i got another cat. her name is "dona petrópolis". her old name at the adoption site was "petrópolis" and despite the fact that i'm not a huge fan of that name, i decided to keep it: someone else had already given her that name and i figured i shouldn't just re-name her so i just added a prefix.

dona doesn't leave her room yet as i have another cat and i'm slowly trying to introduce them so that they dont just hiss at each other.

i got back into sports. i loved running around when i was a kid, how the fuck did i go 20+ years with my ass stuck on a chair?!? physical exercise has done wonders to my head.

(plus i get to smack people now!)

i have at last unfucked my sleeping schedule, this time for good. bed around midnight, waking at 8 every day weekends also. doc said i should so i did- i'd rather get some angry scolding from the doctor rather than truly shitty news a few years from now on. the sunlight makes me feel great and i try to get all my work done before noon.

i no longer use unity in my personal projects. decided to bite the bullet and move to unreal for good. not looking back.

i tolerate my social mistakes more now. everybody fucks up, so what. that person in the subway is never going to see my face again, fuck it.

i've been watching more movies. could watch even more but i'm picky and i hate watching things just for the hell of it or to, gasp, study. fuck that. if i'm not enjoying it, fuck it. i'd like to take a stab at working with movies one day though- i guess i'd have far more fun making one rather than just watching things all the time.

i've been looking into buying an apartment. not now -because i can't afford one yet- but over the next few years. i like living in big cities and i guess i can say i like são paulo, now that i've actually explored it a bit. i'd like to stay here for the unforeseeable future.

(unless i get a job invitation from remedy entertainment. i'd go to helsinki in a flash)

i live alone now. i thought i wouldn't get used to it but i did- i actually got used to it really fast. i like sleeping all by myself because i can stretch my body as much as i want and i'm not disturbed by snoring. i have my own rhythm and i dont have to take anyone into account. i've always wanted to live with someone but you know what? i think i've been wrong all along. i like having the place all to myself. it's going to remain like this for a good while.

however, there is one particular issue that hasn't yet been solved and it probably never will. it is a problem of great complexity and i'm afraid that it probably has no solution at this point. i see many problems that have yet to be solved but this one is the only one in which i see no viable way out and it is a shame. i feel frustrated by problems with no solutions because, as i've probably mentioned before, i feel like problem solving has become part of my identity at this point. not only that but this is a very personal problem which only makes it sting more. i am constantly reminded of it but arh well! nothing remains now except for our regrets.

maybe when i turn 40 i'll have learned how to deal with it. maybe that's how most people deal with problems like these- they just wait until forgetfulness rids them of it. maybe when i'm 50 it'll turn into a mild discomfort in the back of my head and maybe when i'm 70 i'll have no memory of it at all. for problems like these, problems with no solution at all, maybe the only way out is to forget.

it still feels like a shitty way out though. at least i'll have until 2065 to figure something out.

good stuff! talking's good. we should talk more. talk more soon!

[otptings]

Double Sided

→Idol; Hendery

→Genre; Possesive Smut

→Word Count; 3.1k+

→Warnings; degradation, thigh riding, possessive, corruption kink, jealous Hendery, dacryphilia, slight dumbification, overstimulation, unprotected sex, cream pie, oral (fem receiving) , daddy (not so much as a kink), calls you his doll, degradation, somnophilia, auditory exhibitionism, breeding kink,

→Synopsis; Who would've known that Hendery would've had such a different personality than the sweet, goofy man that you met a year ago?

→A/n ~ Hope you enjoy this, I had actually cycled through multiple idols from nct and svt before finally setting on my favorite crackhead, Hendrarrrry. If you liked my one shot please like, reblog, or donate to my Ko-Fi. Feedback is wanted, and requests are open for any idol from enhypen, nct, and svt.

Hendery leaned in close to your ear, lips brushing over it as he spoke.

"Such a good girl for me.” A whimper left your mouth, your skin feeling like it was on fire where his hands gripped your waist.

Hendery was full of surprises. Seemingly so innocent when you first met him, flirting with you shyly before you got gestured to the next member by the staff at the fan meet. Somehow convincing a manager to let him talk to you again, quickly sliding you his number before he got pulled back stage to prepare for the concert. It’s been a year since that fateful day and he was constantly surprising you. Whether it was constantly gifting you presents, or taking you on random dates you were definitely well endowed with his attention.

You knew that wasn’t the only side to Hendery, the side that was always joking around, making you laugh until you felt like your lungs were going to burst. You knew that Hendery had a different side, especially after witnessing his duality at concerts.

This was nothing like you had imagined.

Straddling his thigh while he watched you grind against him, only dressed in one of his oversized t-shirts and a pair of panties. Hickeys already marking your throat where Hendery got impatient - read jealous - while watching you talk with your flirty coworker. A smirk on his lips as you watched your thighs shake, head thrown back while your hands tighten their grip on his shoulders.

“So pretty.” He cupped the back of your neck, pulling you closer to him so that your chests were touching, placing a sloppy kiss over your jugular. “All mine.”

You could only whine at his possessiveness, loving the way he tightens around your neck before letting go. Your hips start to stutter as you feel your orgasm nearing, fire burning so bright you felt as if it was going to burn you alive.

“N-need c-cum please.” Hendery’s smirk only grew while he restrained your hips, forcing your orgasm to fade away into nothingness. A sob falling from your lips while you smacked at his hands, your fourth failed orgasm of the night.

Hendery tsked as he rubbed his thumb over your bare hip, feeling his cock hardening at the sound of your dry sobs.

“You know you’re not allowed to cum. Need to show you that no one would make you feel like me.” You nodded your head as Hendery tapped your hip, signaling for you to start up again.

God, your stupid fucking coworker. You don’t even know why you agreed to go to the company holiday party. Typically choosing to just go home and cuddle with Hendery, occasionally with Bella also when Xiao had you dog sitting. You shouldn’t have told Lula that you would definitely be attending, what even came over you? Maybe it was the fact that she was the nicest one in the office, constantly joining you for lunch and becoming a workplace friend. Either way you regret it now.

You definitely regretted bringing Hendery as your date, especially knowing his tendency to get jealous. Witnessing it after Lucas got too cuddling after a few drinks, appointing you and Ten as his items of affection for the night. Hendery had dragged you to his room after witnessing Lucas attempt to sloppily kiss your cheek. He handed you one of his t-shirts before pulling you onto the bed, keeping you in his room and out of the eyes of the other guys.

You saw how antsy he was while watching you get ready, eyeing your body con dress, attempting to subtly pull it further down your thighs. His hands roaming your thighs as he watched you apply makeup. You had only sighed before asking him if he wanted to come, hoping that him being with you would calm him, keeping his jealousy at bay.

He knew you didn’t know that your coworker Jaehyuk would get flirty while drunk. Easily sliding into the empty space beside you Hendery had left when he went to the bathroom. A strained smile on your lips as you awkwardly sipped your drink, eyes flitting around to see if you could find literally anybody else to talk to. Jaehyuk didn’t let you go that easily, unwanted compliments steadily flowing from his mouth. Hendery had actually witnessed the whole thing, not trusting an intoxicated man with you. Only gripping his cup tightly, laughing at his poor attempts to flirt. It wasn’t until Jaehyuk reached out to you, grabbing your chin and forcing you to look at him. Hendery hadn’t even heard the whimper that left your mouth, didn’t need to see the fear in your eyes before he was crossing the room and yanking you behind him. Saying a few choice words that left your coworker shaking as Hendery led you quickly out of the building.

Hendery didn’t want to risk you thinking about anyone else, leading to his plan to edge you until he was the only thing on your mind, the name on your tongue.

And so far? It was working exactly as planned.

“Aw look at my jeans baby, you're soaking through them.” Embarrassment flooded through you at his condescending tone. His hands squeezing your hips as he felt them start to stutter again, helping you get off.

“You wanna cum baby?” You eagerly nodded your head, hope in your mind that maybe he would go easy on you after all. You are his baby girl after all. That means he’ll be nice to you right? Right?

“Stand up.” Another sob left your mouth, feeling the pain of another lost orgasm. “Right now.” Hendery’s tone was biting, only wanting you to obey him. You stood up on shaky legs, feeling your panties uncomfortably sticking to your folds. He tsked again as he lifted your shirt, revealing the darkening pastel fabric of your underwear. Teasingly tracing around it, laughing at the way you stiffened when he pressed your clit, sensitive from riding his thigh for an hour.

“Bedroom.” The finality in Hendery’s letting you know that there wasn’t room for argument. Quickly heading to the bedroom you wasted time laying on his bed, waiting for his next instruction.

“Do you think you deserve my dick baby? You were awfully friendly with him today.” You shook your head hurriedly, as you tried to get on your knees only for him to push you back down.

“I need you, please Hendery. S’ wet for you. Need you to ruin me.” Hendery’s smirk only grew at your choice of words. Quickly removing his clothes before coming closer to the bed, running his hands over your thighs so he could watch the way that you squirm. Knowing just how much you’ll come to regret your words.

“Mm really? Want me to ruin you?”

“Please.” Hendery’s hand slid up your thighs, squeezing them intermediately before moving to the hem of your underwear, sliding his finger underneath the elastic. Pulling them to the side to admire your pussy that was glistening from your arousal.

“Aw you want me to fuck you like you’re a slut? Nothing more than my dumb little toy.”

You gasped as he blew on your clit, cold air causing you to twitch and grind your hips against the hair. Hendery only repeated the action before licking a line up your cunt, moaning as he tasted your arousal.

“My little slut tastes so good. No wonder Jaehyuk tried to get a taste.” Before you could even show your distaste at hearing that name in such an intimate time Hendery was attaching his lips to your clit. Hands flying down to tangle themselves in his dark hair, hips attempting to grind against his face when he placed a hand on your stomach, keeping your hips pinned to the bed so that you were at his mercy. Only able to pull on his hair and writhe uselessly at the onslaught of pleasure until Hendery got tired of it. And Hendery never got tired of eating pussy.

30 minutes of pure torture. Whenever he felt you clenching around his tongue too much, or a moan would get a little too loud he’d slow down. Blow on your clit, and wait for you to start to sob before going back in. Sucking on your clit even harder before repeating the process, ruining so many orgasms that you felt as if you were going insane. All of your thoughts were of Hendery and your absolute need to have him in you.

“Aw poor little baby. Look at you, trying to hump the air cause I’m not touching you.” Hendery’s condescending tone only added to his constant teasing, and belittling. Hendery loved making you like this, absolutely dick dumb. Your eyes were completely glazed over while your body shook from your dry sobs. Something so alluring knowing that you completely wanted him, hearing the constant begging leaving your swollen lips.

Leaning in he placed his lips on yours. It took a minute for your addled mind to realize what was happening. When the confusion cleared you wrapped your arms around him, pulling him down so that he was flush against your chest, his shirt rubbing almost uncomfortably over your sensitive nipples. His hands went to your waist, squeezing them gently before sliding his hands up under your shirt, cupping your breasts and enjoying the way that you moaned into his mouth. Quickly Hendery went to work, squeezing and flicking your nipples while his tongue slid into your work, licking into your mouth and sliding over the back of your teeth. Fingers dancing down your sides before slipping into your underwear, two fingers circling over your hole before shoving them inside of you, a high pitched moan leaving your mouth at the unexpected intrusion.

Pleads leaving your mouth when he attached his lips to your throat, sucking bruises higher up your throat. So many that you wouldn’t be able to hide them next time you say your ‘flirty’ coworker’. No way that any simple excuse would work for it, everyone would instantly know what happened and who did it. Practically branding his name into your throat, everyone being able to see that you’re his. All his to do whatever he wanted to. His little doll. His slut.

His finger’s steadily massaged over your sweet spot, thumb rubbing over your clit. Your hips were grinding against his hand, whining at the intense need to cum, scared that he was going to pull away at the last minute and cause actual tears.

“You're so close, baby. Cum for me. Cum for daddy.” Hendery drank in all of your moans as you orgasmed, still working his fingers inside of you while placing sloppy kisses along your neck, one kiss for each bruise. Pulling his fingers out and placing them in his mouth,  savoring the sweet taste of your cum that coated his fingers. Watching as your eyes slowly fluttered open to look at him, watching him clean his fingers with a content sigh. Fire already starting to burn again, knowing that the only way you would be satisfied is for him to fuck you.

“Kunhang please.” You rarely said his actual name during sex, so this was more than a pleasant surprise. His cock throbbed hearing it roll off your tongue, and he realized while he was teasing you he was also teasing himself the same exact way. Pulling his fingers from his mouth he quickly helped you take off your shirt, throwing it across the room before hastily taking his jeans off, almost falling off the bed in his haste. A quiet giggle left the both of you when he finally plopped back down, pulling you on top of him, swiftly kissing you again. Less dirty than earlier, but just as needy on both of your parts. Hands entangling in your hair before roughly forcing you to sit up, watching you arch back into nothing.

“Come on baby. You want me baby right?” Hendery smirked while watching you eagerly nod your head. “Then ride me baby. Fuck yourself on my dick.”

Hendery released your hair and watched how you quickly moved to sit on his cock, barely bothering to pull your panties to the side. Another loud moan leaving your mouth as you felt your tight cunt stretch around his dick, placing your hands on his chest to brace yourself.

“Come on slut. You were begging for my dick right?” A hard slap to your ass punctuated his sentence, causing you to clench unconsciously around his dick. “Then move.”

You started to bounce on him, setting a frantic pace nervous that if you didn’t he wouldn’t let you cum again. You could not handle another lost orgasm. Hendery rewarded you with a deep groan, gripping your hips tightly as you rode him like you were on a mission. His dick sliding over all of your sweet spots, the fire in your stomach growing intensely. You tried so hard to get yourself there, not wanting to disappoint him but your thighs started to shake. Already weak from being edged for almost two hours, and they only started to burn at the intense pace you had set, spreading up your hips and down to your knees.

“Can’t.” You cried out, trying to keep your set pace. Hendery’s fingers dug into your waist. You were certainly going to have bruises of his hand prints all over you.

“Can’t wait. My dumb doll can’t ride dick?” Hendery set his heels into the bed, before fucking up into you as you continued to cry that you can’t.

“You wanted my dick. But can’t even ride my dick.” Hendery grunted as he resumed the pace you set, fucking up into you hard. Your mouth hanging open, drool dripping from the corner of your mouth. “So fucking pathetic. My dumb fucking doll.” Hendery slid one of his hands to your clit, rubbing it roughly with his hand causing your second orgasm to hit you, cum squirting out of you and coating his thighs and stomach. At the feeling of you clenching around him he couldn’t himself and came, continuing to fuck his cum deeper into you, only stopping as you started to whine. Wrapping his arms around you, not bothering to pull out as he turned you both to the sides.

“I’m tired.” Hendery laughed at how childish you were speaking, cuddling your head further onto his chest.

“Take a nap doll. Just know we’re not done yet.” You sighed before taking his advice, the room slowly darkening and the sound of his soothing heartbeat lulling you to sleep.

God, you should’ve stayed awake. You knew he was planning something funny when he told you to sleep, but you hadn’t imagined he would wake you up with his slow thrusts, hands on either side of you while you bit the pillow below you, attempting to muffle your moans. The sounds of people stirring in the dorm caused slight fear to flow through you, panic at the thought of Ten coming into the room and seeing Hendery fucking you.

You tried to bury your face further into the pillow but Hendery had other plans, pulling your hips up so that you were on four and grabbing your hair. Yanking it causing your mouth to drop open and a loud moan to echo through the room. You already knew without seeing them that the boys had heard it, the sound of shuffling feet and forks hitting bowls stopping it briefly. You could already imagine Ten, and Lucas’ cocky smirks at the sound, Winwin’s face turning bright red from embarrassment, while Kun just tried to change the topic because of  Xiao and Yangyang asking too many questions. It wasn’t the first time that they had heard you, and knowing Hendery it wouldn’t be the last.

“You're thinking about them hearing us.” You tried to deny it but Hendery only slapped your ass, the smack resounding throughout the room and if you didn’t know better you could almost hear one of the boys saying ‘ouch’. “The way you’re clenching around me. Thinking about one of them walking in huh? See me fucking my kids deeper into your messy cunt, still dripping with my cum from earlier.” Another loud moan, and an awkward cough from the other room. White, hot shame flooded your veins, knowing you wouldn’t be able to face the boys afterwards.

Teeth digging into your lip, trying to protect the little bit of dignity you still had around the boys. Hendery didn’t like that one. Grabbing your hands and holding them against your back, forcing your arch to deepen. In this position every thrust hit your g spot directly, and you weren’t able to muffle your moans, only able to helplessly drool at the intense sensations. Your continuous lack of noise was only angering Hendery, wanting all of the boys to know how good he makes you feel. They would never be able to see you like this, dick dumb and drooling, only able to mumble as he fucked into you like this.

“Dumb fucking doll. Feel so good you can’t even moan huh?” Pulling your arms you groaned from the pain as he pulled you back into his chest, free hand sliding around to play with your poor, swollen clit. Abusing it once more as he rubbed sloppy circles over it, pressing his thumb against it harshly causing a scream to leave your mouth.

“My dumb doll. My little fucking slut. All mine.” You felt yourself clench around him, orgasm rapidly approaching along with some pain from overstimulation.

“Cum for me doll, all over my dick just like this.” With one last well placed bite from Hendery at the base of your throat you felt your orgasm wash over you. Warm, tears flowing down your face as he continued to fuck into you, squirting more of his thick, hot cum into your tired cunt. Hendery slowly pulled out, laying you onto the bed before tossing on some sweatpants and heading to the bathroom.

After very thorough aftercare, you were sitting in bed with Hendery, eating noodles while watching some random movie that he had put on, Bella sensing your slightly distressed state was curled up on your lap. Glancing over at Hendery you watched as he laughed before shoving noodles into his mouth, feeling a smile tug at your lips.

No matter how many sides he had to, you loved each one of them.

⇣Random Crack Dialogue⇣

“Should we go check on her? It’s been an hour since we’ve heard anything.”

“I don’t even want to sleep in my bed, they’ve contaminated the whole room.” Ten whined while throwing himself onto Lucas.

“Let them be, we all saw how Hendery grinned at us while getting the food. He’s doing all this on purpose.”

“It is weird to say I’m proud of him.” All of them turned to Yangyang, who only shrugged his shoulders as he went back to stealing Winwin’s chips. “I mean out of everybody I would’ve thought that Lucas would be the first one to do that.”

“Hey! Can you guys believe him?”

Silence ensued, as everybody believed it.

[isagisyoichi]

VERY VERY VERY

SYNOPSIS: attractive things they do

CHARACTERS INCLUDED: isagi, bachira, chigiri, kunigami, raichi, gagamaru, naruhaya, nagi, reo, rin, sae, niko, shidou, yukimiya, nanase, hiori

WARNINGS: none actually

A/N: this is my apology for the ick headcanons 🥰 anyways happy LATE valentine's day (i meant to post this two days ago but forgot lol) y'all mwah i hope you guys enjoy

ISAGI YOICHI: when he gets flustered or starts to feel shy, isagi does that thing where he sheepishly rubs his hand behind his neck and smiles. the way he looks when he gets in the zone during a game is just oh so attractive. the way isagi just does a whole 180° in personality on the field and confidence he exudes is just so *heart eyes* you're always in awe of your boyfriend's duality.

BACHIRA MEGURU: has no problems showing you off. the type to cling onto you or kiss you in front of his friends, the team, anyone really, because he's that in love with you. also 100% lets you do his make up whenever you want. and he's genuinely interested in what everything is and what it does, and asks a lot of questions. be forewarned though, if he finds them, bachira will use your falsies as a fake mustache and begin to speak in a french accent for fun.

KUNIGAMI RENSUKE: likes to put one hand in the back of jean pocket and let his other arm wrap around your neck when you two walk together. he finds it more romantic than handholding, actually. he's respectful to everyone, but kunigami truly holds the utmost respect for his mom and sisters. you can see how much kunigami loves and appreciates them, and it just makes you melt. also likes to surprise you with flowers sometimes for no reason other than he just simply thinks you deserve them :)

CHIGIRI HYOUMA: looks sooo good when he runs his hands through his hair. even though it's such a normal guy thing to do, he manages to make it look super attractive, almost like he came straight out a movie or something. chigiri has this habit of rolling his eyes when he's annoyed or pissed off. you know you shouldn't find it as attractive as you do, but something about all the attitude in the action just makes your brain go god he's hot.

RAICHI JINGO: says you can dress however you want because he can fight. (and the answer is yes, yes he actually can.) and when the occasion calls for it, raichi will give you the best hugs ever. he holds you so tight, like it's the last time he'll be able to, and it makes you never ever want him to let go. he uses his one of his hands to stroke your head lovingly at the same time, as alternates between whispering soft and sweet, "i love you's" and placing faint kisses on you. every time you're in raichi's arms, you feel like you're home.

GAGAMARU GIN: lets you paint his nails, but as long as you let him pick out the color. he's very intrigued by the process, and watches intently as you skillfully apply the polish. one day, gagamaru even asks to paint yours, and actually does pretty well. gagamaru's also good with kids, surprisingly. he finds them fun to talk to, and always entertains them in whatever they want to make conversation about. once, you caught him conversing with your six year old cousin about the scu (spongebob cinematic universe.)

NARUHAYA ASAHI: the way he cares for his family makes your heart so, so warm. he truly does go above and beyond for them. sometimes you just sit and thank the universe that you're lucky to have someone with a good of a heart as him. even though he's known for stealing other people's food, naruhaya never hesitates to give you any of his. in fact, he practically forces you to take a bite and eat. he cares about you a lot and wants you to be as healthy as possible.

NAGI SEISHIRO: is really touchy, you would soon come to find out. he has to be touching you someway- resting his head on top of yours, his hand on your thigh, his hand holding yours, yeah, he's a clingy one. don't even try moving him off either, it's useless. nagi's just gonna place himself right back to where he was before. nagi is also an avid wearer of sweatpants and basketball shorts when he's at home, and he looks damn good in them. as doja cat once said, "awooga!"

MIKAGE REO: even when you guys are fighting, reo always texts you "goodnight." it doesn't even matter to him if you don't respond, reo just doesn't want the last thing you hear from him before you sleep to be something bad. reo was raised to be a gentleman, so he does all the classics- holds open the door for you, offers you his coat whenever he sees you're the slightest bit cold, you know the usual. it's like you're dating someone straight out of a shoujo anime.

ITOSHI RIN: his morning voice sounds sooo nice. it's the right amount of raspy and sleepy, and you just wanna listen to him talk forever. sometimes when he practices at home, rin wears old shirts that are just a little too short on him, and so you can see his abs when he stretches. sometimes when he catches you looking, rin'll joke that "staring isn't polite," in his usual deadpan manner.

ITOSHI SAE: says stuff like "hm?" "oh yeah?" "mhm." even though it's incredibly bare minimum, something about his voice and those words sends you into orbit. sae also uses the top of his pointer finger to lift your chin to make you look up at him when he wants your undivided attention. and believe me, it works every time because when you're face to face with sae, it's very hard to pay attention to anything else.

NIKO IKKI: has almost zero internet presence. niko has like sixty followers on instagram, the last time he tweeted was in 2018, and he thinks snapchat is stupid. what a man he is, truly. and although this may be slightly hypocritical of him, niko always moves your hair out your face when you talk so he can see you better. and of course, you always return the favor by moving his hair out of his face so you can see niko better. he never fails to blush at your actions, and it's seriously the cutest thing ever.

SHIDOU RYUSEI: is the type lean on the wall or the side of a surface when he talks to you. you always get a good view of his toned arms and honestly, something about the way he casually leans closer into you when he can't hear just makes your head spin. ryusei has a thing for casual commands, stuff like "c'mere, sit with me," or "tell me about your day, baby." it's so simple, but so, so attractive.

NANASE NIJIROU: is so cute when he gets excited. nanase's eyes light up like fireworks in the middle of the summer, the enthusiasm in his voice can be heard from a mile away, and he had this adorable little habit of bouncing up and down a little, too. animals really like him. they kinda just flock to him, and nanase has no problems with this. cats in particular seem to have really taken a liking to him. he's really sweet to them, as well and it takes everything for nanase not to just bring every animal he sees home.

YO HIORI: has a tendency to buy oversized sweaters to wear during the cold months. he looks really good im them , but sometimes they're a little too big, especially at the sleeves, so hiori gets sweaterpaws and he looks absolutely adorable. hiori has a really nice singing voice. most of the time, he hums a little to himself when he's not thinking too much about it, but he doesn't really sing on his own accord. but, if you asked nicely, he'd totally sing you to sleep with his dulcet, honey-like voice.

YUKIMIYA KENYU: if soccer wasn't his passion, yuki could one hundred percent be a dancer. the way he moves so smoothly makes it look like he's been doing this his whole life. and when he looks as good as he does, you can never pass up the chance to join him on the dancefloor. being a literal model may have given him a little advantage, but yuki can dress so, so well. he's like a walking pinterest board, and he's always down to dress you up, too.

[justanotherblonde23]

I Want You - A Din Djarin Story

Author’s Note: Hey there, internet friends. So I had an ask from my friend @hdlynnslibrary that I can’ find to save my life. Luckily, I wrote it down! “Hi Kat! My darling! I must admit to feeling #horny okay? Soooo what about a prompt for my fav space man Din? Like maybe with an #inexperienced reader?” Oh Heather, my love, ask and you shall receive! What started out as a little somethin became 14 pages, double spaced, 12 point Times New Roman font. So my darling, I hope you enjoy this Din x reader fic, it was made with LOTS of love <3

Warnings: SMUT, there is definately sexy times going on over here, all aboard the horny train, leaving the station as we speak. Choo-fuckin-choo! Also, language because I am me and since I was born and raised in Boston and I have been swearing like a goddamn sailor since, well, ever lol. Oh, and there’s a slight breeding kink, just an FYI. I’m sorry, it just all came out and I couldn’t help it and Din Djarin wants his clan to expand, okay? 

Thank you to all who read, like, comment, reblog, etc. It warms my heart that you all are enjoying my work. Please let me know what you think of this one :-)

You had been traveling with Din on the Razor Crest for the past year or so. He found you on Arvala-7, working alongside Kuiil. You were good with your hands, fast with a blaster, and most importantly, you connected with the Child. From the second that kid saw you, he decided that you were his. He was the largest reason that you were here right now. How anyone could resist those big eyes, his floppy ears, and that cute baby smile. He turned your heart to putty. 

Your days were spent mostly on the Crest, keeping an eye on the little one and tending to the ship the best you could. The baby required a fair bit of effort, but you didn’t mind; he had become like your own child without you even realizing it. 

Somewhere along the way, you had become closer with the Mandalorian that you traveled with. Clipped sentences became more extended conversations as you gently urged him out of his shell. Soon, he became curious about you, asking all sorts of unimportant questions, ranging from where you grew up to what your favorite color was. Dinners alone with the kid turned into Mando joining you, lifting his helmet ever so slightly so that he could take a sip of the broth you made or a bite of the ration pack you heated up. Every time he did this, you made sure to keep your eyes on your plate, never wanting to disrespect his Creed in any way. 

As the months progressed, your feelings for one stoic Mandalorian grew. You caught yourself lingering in the cockpit more when after you put the little one down at night. You also caught yourself staring on more than one occasion, and you knew for a fact that Mando saw you, too. How could you not stare at that imposing figure that you shared a home with? The duality of the man was awe-inspiring, to be sure. He was a fearsome warrior, and you had witnessed his prowess first hand many a time. He brought bounties in nonstop, always jetting off to the next one before the last quarry had been frozen away in carbonite for a day. And then there was the gentleness that he had with the baby. You could tell that this was his first time taking care of another person by himself. Sometimes he was a bit rough around the edges, but he did try his best. He was learning how to be the best parent he could for the kid, and watching that play out warmed your heart. 

Often times, when he took the kid up to the cockpit so that you could use the refresher and wash the day away, you could hear him up there talking to the kid gently. Sometimes he speaks in Basic; other times, he speaks in what you assume is Mando’a. Every once in a while, you hear him sing the baby a lullaby on those restless nights where nothing seems to calm that sweet baby down. The first time you heard him sing softly to the kid, you knew that you loved him. 

You never felt right acting on your feelings; you didn’t know how he thought about you. Also, you were terrified of making a fool of yourself. Truth be told, you have never been in a man’s bed before. The life of a refugee of the Empire didn’t leave much time for amorous encounters. By the time you found Kuiil, all you wanted was to keep your head down and do your work. If you happened to meet someone along the way, fantastic, but you had more pressing matters to attend to, like surviving in the desert. 

That all changed one night when you least expected it. Mando had taken the kid to soothe him and put him to sleep, so you took the opportunity to use the fresher. You had been working hard that day, repairing areas of the Crest that needed maintenance while juggling an inquisitive little one. You took your time, relishing the way that the water felt against your bare skin, the warmth seeping into your muscles and soothing your bones. You wouldn’t tell anyone, but you viewed water as a gift from the Maker itself. For the first time in your life, you didn’t have to scrounge and save every last drop. You’d never had the luxury of using actual water the bathe daily; you’d never been in the financial position to have such a thing. For the Galaxy working class, a sonic was the best you could hope for most of the time. It cleansed the body of dirt and grime just fine, but it wasn’t pleasant like water was. 

In all honesty, your idea of a luxuriously long shower was well under ten minutes, but it was a dream come true for you. After you were clean and smelling of the fresh soap that you used, it was time for you to get out. You grabbed the small towel, drying your body, and then reached for your clothes. Your hands floundered around a bit until you realized that you had inadvertently forgotten to bring a new pair of clothes or your sleep shirt in with you. You had been in too much of a rush to hand off the baby and get just a few moments to yourself. 

You groaned at your flightiness. Kriff, that only left you with two options: you could either put your dirty clothes back on, or you could try to make your way back to your sleeping quarters wrapped in this tiny ass towel. Neither option particularly appealed to you, but your desire for cleanliness finally won out. 

You gathered up your belongings and quietly opened the refresher door, careful not to be too loud. It usually took a bit of time to calm the baby down enough for him to go to sleep, and you didn’t want to interrupt that process. The lights in the hold were dimmed, leaving you with the ability only to see a few steps in front of you. 

Unfortunately, your quest to be stealthy was in vain. You had forgotten that you had moved a particular toolbox during your work project this morning. Said toolbox ended up being placed right where you could smack your little toe on it. You yelped in pain, dropping everything in your arms in favor of hopping up and down on one foot and clutching the other in your hands. This caused the towel to also fall to the ground, leaving you bare. A noise drew your attention up, and your eyes met a helmet, staring right back. Mando was standing right in front of you, apparently drawn by the noise. 

You dropped your foot, standing up straight, eyes wide in shock. You didn’t move; you barely breathed. Your mind was short-circuiting, and you didn’t even have the sense to pick up your towel off the ground. Your body was overflowing with embarrassment, horror, and- was that arousal? Stars, you were standing here, completely bare, across from the Mandalorian who has every inch of himself covered. 

Ever so slowly, he reached down and grabbed the towel you had dropped, carefully wrapping it back around you. His hand accidentally brushed your breast, causing you to suck in a breath of surprise. He murmured his apologies, beginning to withdraw his hands, but you were faster. You reached out, stilling his retreating hands and placing them back on your body. You wanted this, you wanted him, and you wanted to make sure that he knew it. 

He tilted his helmet curiously, waiting for you to give him a prompt. He took in your labored breathing, your increased heart rate, the way you bit your lip. Your eyes met his visor, and he could barely even see your eye color because your pupils were so blown with lust and desire. He groaned a deep, low sound in his chest at your obvious reaction to his presence. 

“What do you want, sweet girl?” he ground out, trying to keep himself in check. 

You moved your hands, gently cradling his helmet where his cheeks would be, breathing in his scent swirling so close to you. You could smell the blaster residue, the leather, the metal of his beskar, the soap you both used in the shower, and that smell that was uniquely his. You’d never get tired of it, not in this life or the next. 

“I want you,” was your reply. “Touch me, Mando, please.”

“Din,” came his reply, almost in a whisper, as if it was something sacred. 

You frowned, your nose scrunched up in confusion. You studied this helmet, eyes searching for answers. 

“My name, it’s Din. Din Djarin.”

Your mouth dropped open in shock, eyes wide with confusion. You knew the sacredness of a name in this Galaxy. Stars, you hadn’t even told him your own name for a solid three months. The only reason he had found out was because he overheard you talking to the kid one day. A name was even more sacred to a Mandalorian. It was precious, something to be guarded with the utmost care. You’d never even wagered that he’d give it to you, ever. 

“You can use it, but with just me and the kid around. No one else gets to know it, no one but you.” 

You nodded, understanding just how much it had taken for him to tell you. His name was a gift, something that you would keep close and cherish. 

“Din,” you spoke the Mandalorian’s name for the first time, testing it on your tongue, relishing the taste of it in your mouth. It was a good name, a solid name, a name fitting for the warrior before you. “Din Djarin, a beautiful name.” 

Hearing his name in your mouth set Din’s soul on fire. The way you spoke it, the way you had considered it and acknowledged the importance of what he had just given you, it made him want to hear it again and again. He wanted to listen to you moan his name in ecstasy, begging him for more, begging him for pleasure. He wanted to hear you yell it, mutter it, say it in everyday conversation. He wanted to hear his name drip from your lips for the rest of his life. 

That night was the first time he took you and gave you pleasure. You had come on his tongue and fingers three times before you were strung out and exhausted. You fell asleep in his bunk wrapped tightly in his arms. That was two months ago. 

You still had yet to take him fully, to allow him to be inside of you. You had admitted that you were nervous, that you had no experience to work off of. Din had been nothing but patient and kind, never pressuring you into anything that you weren’t comfortable with. He had told you that, “We have all the time in the world, sweet girl. There’s no need to rush.” You believed him wholeheartedly, but in the past weeks, you had found yourself wanting more. Sure, you were still frightened, you didn’t know what you were doing, but that burn and ache inside of you kept getting more intense as the days went by. You know that Din would take care of you. 

It’s been a rough day, and that’s an understatement. You helped with the bounty this time because the information you were given indicated that this quarry was heavily guarded. Mando couldn’t say no to an extra blaster covering his ass. Thankfully, this mission was on Tatooine, meaning that you could leave the little one with Peli. Maker knows that woman loves your little green bean; how could she not? Green bean loves her right back and seems to be particularly fond of the pit droids. You think it has something to do with the fact that he can bonk their noses to make them spring to life, but you can’t be sure. 

Unfortunately, it turns out that this asshole was much more protected than you had been led to believe. You would have some choice words for Greef Karga to pass along to whoever had commissioned this kriffing bounty. You both had more or less emerged unscathed, but there would most certainly be bruises covering you two from head to toe. 

Once the bounty was frozen away in carbonite, you could breathe a little better. He wouldn’t be giving you any trouble now. When Peli saw that state you were in, she insisted that she keep the little one for the night, which was a relief. As much as you loved that sweet little boy, you needed a breather. Hopefully, you’d be able to spend some much needed time with just you and your Mandalorian. 

You found yourself on Din’s lap with a blindfold covering your eyes so he could kiss you. You would rather not see anything at all and have his lips on yours than have your sight with his helmet on. You both were in your underclothes, your legs straddling him. 

That’s when the kisses began. There was something about kissing Din Djarin that was otherworldly. The way he poured all his love and care into a kiss never ceases to blow you away. He always started so gently, building you up and setting you on fire. How could anything be that good, that pleasurable? He licked into your mouth, moaning at your taste. Your Mandalorian loved to kiss you. He nipped at your bottom lip, causing you to gasp, pleasure shooting straight down to your core. 

He moved his kisses to your jaw and down the column of your neck, leaving bruising in his wake. Din whispered in your ear, telling you how beautiful you were, how good you tasted, how you were just for him. The thought that you were his, that this fearsome warrior had opened himself up enough to let you in, it urged you forward. 

You began to rock back and forth on his thigh, chasing that feeling of bliss. He stopped you for a moment, helping you wiggle out of your panties, before urging you to start once more. This felt even better, your slick dripping out onto his thigh, helping you create beautiful friction. By the sounds he was making, Din was enjoying it, too. The feeling of his muscles hard beneath you, your clit rubbing deliciously against him, was heavenly. You could feel the sparks in your tummy, the clench of your cunt around nothing; you were so close. 

Din urged you on, his hands at your hips, moving you. He muttered about how gorgeous you were as you took your pleasure on his thigh, how he wanted to see you cum on him, how he wanted to taste your sweet pussy after you came. His words were what finally did you in, the dam bursting and your orgasm hitting you full force. Your hips began to stutter, but your Mandalorian kept you moving, riding the waves of pleasure, extending your bliss. Finally, your whines led him to stop; you were far too sensitive to continue. You panted, trying to catch your breath. 

As you sat there, your head on Din’s shoulder, centering yourself once more, you realized what exactly was pressing against your thigh. You could feel his rock hard, dripping cock, just within reach. The thought of it made your pussy clench and your mouth water. You wanted Din Djarin, all of him, in every way possible. You wanted to feel him inside of you, wrecking you and making you see stars. 

“Din,” you murmured, “I want you.” 

He nuzzled his nose into your hair, breathing you in. “You have me, Mesh’la, any way you want me.”

You sat up straight on his lap, facing him. If you didn’t have a blindfold on, you’re sure you’d be looking him directly in the eye. “No, I want you. I want you inside of me; I want your cock, Din.” 

Your Mandalorian groaned at your admission. There was nothing he wanted more. He took in the earnest expression on your face, looking for any sign of hesitance or anxiety. He never wanted you to feel pressured into doing anything that you didn’t want to do. He didn’t want you to feel as if you needed to do something to please him. He wanted you to explore sex at your own pace, never another’s. 

“Cyare, are you sure? There is no rush for us. My satisfaction comes from the fact that I can satisfy you and that you trust me enough to allow me to be the first to touch you in this way. There is no timetable besides your wants, needs, and desires, mesh’la. I don’t want you to pressure yourself.” 

You smiled at his words, his voice so soft and sweet for you. He was always so considerate, never rushing you or telling you that you were going too slowly. The kindness and care this great warrior continuously showed you reminded you of this complicated man’s duality. You felt safe with him, and you wanted all of him. 

“Din, baby, no, I don’t feel pressured. I’ve been thinking about it for weeks now. I want to feel you inside of me; I want you to make love to me, please.” 

He cradled your face in his palms for a moment, his thumbs gliding over your cheeks. Then, he kissed you. It wasn’t a gentle kiss; it was full of passion, sinking you deeper into arousal. He kissed you like you were the only thing in the world that he loved, and maybe he did. Perhaps you and the kid were his whole heart. His tongue expertly explored your mouth, causing you to mewl and moan. He knew just what would get you going. 

He pulled away, sucking in precious oxygen as you did the same. Carefully, he turned the both of you around and laid you down on his cot. It wasn’t the most comfortable thing in the galaxy, not by a long shot. It was designed more for efficiency than comfort. The thing was, though, you didn’t care. It was Din’s, and he was willing to share it with you. You could feel him hovering over you, his breath warm against your face. 

“Let me taste you, sweet girl. Let me get you ready to take my cock.”

You gasped, feeling his cock rock back and forth, covering himself in your slick. You were at a loss for words, so many sensations happening all at once. All you could manage was a nod, and a whimpered, “Please, Din.” 

Your Mandalorian kissed his way down your body, leaving behind bite marks and bruises where he wanted to cause heightened sensations. Before he even made it to your pussy, you were already painfully wet for him. You could feel his breath ghosting over the place where you wanted him the most. You lifted your hips in an attempt to spur him on, but all it got you was a muscular arm forcing your hips back down to the cot. 

“Patience, cyar’ika, I want you to feel every ounce of pleasure that I can wring out of you. Enjoy the moment, feel the suspense, don’t simply rush to the finish line, little one.” 

You yelped as you felt him bite into the juncture of your hip and thigh, sucking in hard to leave a mark. He soothed the skin with his tongue, so close to where you needed him, but not close enough. He repeated the process on the other side, marking you in a place only the two of you would ever see, like a secret that you both would share. 

Unexpectedly, his tongue licked a broad stripe from the bottom of your slit to your clit. You sighed; that was the feeling you so desperately wanted. He lapped at your cunt like a man starved, and you were the best thing on the menu. He knew how to work you into a frenzy, and quickly, he played your body like an instrument that he had been practicing on for a lifetime. You quaked and shook as your second orgasm of the night took hold, bursting and pulling you ever forward into the bliss you so desperately craved. 

Even after you had ridden out your orgasm, Din didn’t stop. He worked you over, inserting one finger and then another inside of you, hitting that one spot inside you that made you see stars over and over. His mouth never stopped, his tongue lazily drawing loose circles around your clit, never slowing down, but keeping a steady pace. Your hips fought to lift off the cot, simultaneously fighting and chasing that feeling of ecstasy. When he scissored his fingers inside of you and twisted his wrist just so, you lost it once more. A scream that sounded something like his name tore out of your throat as the stars exploded behind your eyes. 

You felt like you were floating in space, freely and without a care in the world. You reached a new height of pleasure that you’d never even imagined before. You could touch the sky and would never ever come down. You thought every encounter with your Mandalorian was pure rapture, but this was beyond anything you had ever felt before. You were panting, gasping for the oxygen your body so desperately needed, and you felt better than you ever had before. As your head left the clouds, you realized you had a dopey smile on your face, and your lover was covering you with kisses everywhere he could reach. 

Vaguely, you heard his whispers in the dark. You were so good for me, mesh’la. You looked so beautiful cumming on my fingers and tongue. You taste divine, starshine. Those words went straight to your heart and to your pussy, flooding you with more arousal than you had ever thought possible. A deep kiss on your lips finally brought you back to the present, the warm body on top of you centering your mind. 

“Are you ready for my cock, sweet girl? Do you still want to feel me inside of you? I promise I’ll go slow.”

You nodded in response, your words failing you. 

“I need to hear you say it, cyare. I need to hear you tell me that you want this, that you’re sure.” 

Your head lolled a bit as you processed his words, still feeling slightly hazy. 

“Din Djarin, I want you inside of me. Please, please, I want you more than I’ve ever wanted anything before.”

He chuckled at your pleas, a smile pressed into the crook of your neck. 

“I’ll be most delighted to give you what you want, sweet girl. Whatever you want, it’s yours. Are you ready for me?”

You breathed out a yes as you felt him coat himself in your slick, making sure he could ease into you. You knew he was quite large. You had curiously wondered aloud one day if all men were built like that. Even though his size intimidated you, you wanted everything he could give you. The excitement fizzled in your belly; you were getting wetter by the second. 

Ever so slowly, your Mandalorian lined himself up with you and began to press in. You gasped at the feeling of just the head of his cock inside of you, the blunt tip spearing into you. He paused before he began to move again. Slowly, inch by inch, he pressed himself into you, stopping ever so often to make sure that you had time to adjust to him. It didn’t hurt nearly as much as the girls in your hometown had made it seem. Maybe they hadn’t been with the proper lovers, or perhaps the boys they were sleeping with were just inexperienced and too young. All you knew was that there was a pinch of pain, yes, but the pleasure outweighed any discomfort you may have felt. 

You could feel every delicious inch of him inside you, splitting you open and filling you up like nothing ever had before. You could feel every ridge and vein as he inched his way into you. You couldn’t even put a name to this feeling, but you wanted more. Eventually, he was fully seated inside of you; your hips flush against his own. You felt so full, stuffed to the brim, and Maker, you loved it. He waited for a minute or two, allowing you to adjust to him and have a chance to take in all these new sensations. You had thought his fingers were terrific, but they were nothing compared to the feel of his cock deep inside of you. 

He kissed you. It was all teeth, tongue, and lips, and stars; it was perfect. He devoured your mouth, taking what was his. You couldn’t help the little sounds that sprung up from your throat when he did that. He answered you with guttural groans of his own. You could feel the way those sounds made his chest rumble; you could feel it in your chest pressed against him. 

He grabbed your leg, propping it up on his hip, and he began to move. He never went too fast for you or too hard, keeping a steady pace that kept you comfortable but still dragged you forward to a fourth orgasm. You didn’t even know you had it in you until Din used two of his fingers to assault your clit, encouraging that bundle of nerves to give you one more burst of pleasure. The combination of his cock deep inside you and his fingers on your clit was enough to send you toppling over the edge once more. This orgasm was more intense than the others, blazing white-hot through your veins and setting your soul on fire. If you thought you had been screaming before, you were mistaken. You writhed and squirmed under your lover, your pleasure causing your body to shake like a leaf. You sobbed his name over and over, tears spilling out of your eyes from sheer ecstasy. 

Your Mandalorian groaned deeply at the feel of your pussy clamping down on him like a vice. You were so tight, to begin with, and your orgasm grabbed him and shoved him into his orgasm. As he emptied himself deep within you, he couldn’t help but mumble praises. “Oh Mesh’la, you’re so tight for me, so beautiful laid bare just for me. You’re such a good girl, a sweet girl, my girl. I’ll give you whatever you want, baby. Adventure, new experiences, my love- fuck if you want it, I’ll give you warriors, children of our own.” 

You both laid there for a while afterward, basking in the glow of post-sex haze. You carded your fingers through his curls, gently scratching his scalp as he pressed sweet kisses into your skin. He was still inside you; neither of you could bear the thought of being parted just yet. You could stay like this forever, caught in this in-between time, not yet floating back into reality. 

“I would like that,” you murmured, never stopping your movements in his hair. 

“Like what, cyare?” 

“For you to give me warriors of our own, Din.”

You could feel him twitch inside you, clearly interested. His head shot up, studying yours closely, looking for any falsehood or hesitance in your blindfolded face. 

“You mean it?” He breathed out. 

You grinned, feeling around for his face. You traced his sharp jawline, the proud cure of his nose, the pout of his plump lips. This was the face of the man you loved, the man you wanted to spend the rest of your life with. Wherever he was in the Galaxy, that was home. 

“Yes, my love, I mean it. We have our little green bean, and eventually, he’s going to need some friends to play with. We wouldn’t want him to be lonely. And besides, there’s no one I’d rather raise warriors with than you.”

You heard a faint sniffle before his lips were on yours once more. You had a family, but there was always room to add more to this clan of three. 

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[jessikahathaway]

Owner Part VI

I apologize for not updating this one in a while. But it is also cross posted on AO3.org, just under a different name, DreamingCompanion. If I missed anything in the tags please let me know! Love you guys! 

Pairing: Jungkook X Reader

Genre: Romance, Hybrid!AU

Words: 3.8k

Warnings: Penetrative Sex, Unprotected Sex (Kinda she has an IUD), Oral (F receiving), Dirty Talk. 

“What? Have sex with you? Jungkook no!” you gasped out, but your heart was pounding in your chest. Barely able to hold onto the last shred of your sanity.

“Please, it hurts so bad,” he whimpered, reaching out for you desperately. On instinct you reached for him too, taking his wet hand in yours. He was trembling, his body was hot, as if he were on fire. You felt fear trickle down your spine. He looked so genuinely distressed that it made you want to comfort him in any way that you could. 

But that message... Two weeks...

It really was dangerous messing with all of this. Jungkook was no doubt worth millions, but as he sat here in your shower, he looked like a wounded animal, just begging for help. 

How were you supposed to choose?

Could Jungkook even consent in the state that he’s in?

“Jungkook we can’t, you’ll regret this,” you tried to reason away, bringing a towel to his head to dry him off a little bit.

“I won’t!” he denied vehemently. 

“Jungkook.”

“I won’t! I’ve wanted you since you took me in! But you’re always ignoring me, not letting me touch you and it drives me crazy that any man could walk through that door... I want to be the only man that comes home to you, and your food and your smiling face. I want it to me that you touch, no one else,” he growled.

“What has gotten into you?” you asked, eyebrows rising to a height you didn’t think possible. 

“It’s my heat,” he whimpered, head lolling to the side slightly.

“Easy, Jungkook listen to me, what does that mean?” you tried getting out of him.

“My heat is... it’s my... natural breeding time,” he said. 

“So you get this yearly?”

“Yes, but, didn’t think... Didn’t think I could anymore,” he said.

Your heart ached when you thought about his hard past, and everything that he’d done to get to this point right here in front of you. And he was living in your home, your guest. Your... your friend. And you wanted him to be safe and comfortable as long as he could be. And if that meant you were to give a piece of yourself to him you’d never get back...

Then so be it.

He was fading quickly. You had to work faster. 

“Jungkook, Jungkook listen to me,” you said, cradling his face in your hands. 

“Whaa?” he asked, mouth falling open slightly. 

“I’ll do it, let’s go to bed,” you said, reaching for his hand.

Jungkook froze underneath you, making you worry that something bad was going to happen.

“Don’t say that and not mean it, Y/N,” he warned, voice husky and dark. It made a throb of want coarse through your body.

“I mean it, let’s get you out of here and go to bed,” you said softly, encouraging him to stand up. 

Before you could think you were pinned against the floor, Jungkook’s naked frame atop you.

“Y/N,” he whispered, looking at you with such a tenderness you weren’t sure if he wanted to fuck you or snuggle up to you right on the spot.

“This isn’t my bed,” you corrected.

“I don’t care,” he whispered, bringing his lips down to connect with yours. You inhaled sharply through your nose at the sensation of Jungkook’s lips being pressed against yours so firmly. He was warm and soft, yet not ridgid. Pulling away, Jungkook brushed a strand of your hair out of your face.

“Come on, my back is starting to hurt from laying down here,” you said, trying to stand up. Jungkook helped you, but quickly pulled you into his embrace, laying his head in your neck and breathing in deeply.

“You smell so good,” he whimpered, rutting against you lightly. You choked back a groan, this was about Jungkook not you.

“Come over here,” you said, heading towards the bed. 

Jungkook was quick to follow you, making you laugh a little. He pouted but stayed quiet. You sat down on your bed. Jungkook stood in front of you, naked as the day he was born. A blush ravaged your cheeks as you tried to compose yourself. Although Jungkook wasn’t the waiting type it appeared. Coming closer he brought his lips to yours again, hands on either side of your body. He took full control of the kiss, licking and nipping at your lips with a sincerity that could only come from him. Jungkook brought his hand up to your shoulder and pushed you back into a lying position on the bed. You let him lay you down, enjoying the feeling of his lips on yours. 

“Jungkook,” you whispered, this got his attention as he looked at you with concern.

“Is something wrong, d-do you want me to stop?” he asked.

“No, no, keep going... please,” you begged lightly, wanting the man to continue his exploration of your body. 

“Okay, just tell me if it gets to be too much,” he said, hooking his hands under your armpits and hoisting you to the top of the bed. You squeaked out in surprise at his strength, but other than that you tried to remain as calm as you could. Your racing heart not helping in that process. 

Jungkook crawled up to you, body on display as you marveled at him. He was so muscular, but also so lithe and handsome. You couldn’t help but imagine was sex with him would be like. No doubt a passionate affair. Although, you wouldn’t have to imagine much longer the way things were going now. He sniffed all over you, enjoying the way you smelt to him. Sweet like sugar, but warm like a summer day. He wanted all of you, right now. 

As he came up to your face you grabbed him by the cheeks and kissed him passionately, licking his lips and asking for entrance. He opened his mouth and let you explore every inch of him. You took this opportunity to tangle your fingers in his hair. His lush locks felt like silk against your skin, it was so nice. You took a hold of a little clump of hair towards the back of his head and tugged lightly, just to see how he would react. A soft groan came from the man in front of you. 

“Fuck, I love when you play with my hair,” he said, wrapping his arms around your waist to pull you closer. You smiled and continued to play with his long strands of hair. He came closer, kissing your neck gently. You sighed into the sensation and let him do whatever he wanted. He licked and sucked at your throat, making your legs jolt slightly from the sensation. You could feel his smirk on your skin, as he continued to suckle your delicate neck. Jungkook was breathing rather hard, as if he were holding something back.

“Jungkook, you don’t have to hold back with me,” you said. 

Jungkook froze against you, then a small whine pierced the air. 

“But I don’t want to hurt you,” he said quietly. 

“You won’t hurt me, I trust you Jungkook,” you said, cradling his cheek with your palm. 

He looked at you with such emotion you almost thought he was going to cry. 

“I don’t take that lightly, Y/N, I promise I’ll treat you right,” he said.

“I know you will,” you smiled. 

“Do you like being eaten out?” he asked, looking up at you with curiosity twinkling in his lust covered eyes. 

“Um... No one’s ever really done that for me,” you whispered. 

“What?” Jungkook balked, looking at you as if you had a third boob or something. 

“No one’s ever gone down on me before,” you admitted. None of your previous boyfriends were interested in something like that. They just wanted to get to the main course, even if it meant you were a little uncomfortable for the majority of it. 

“That’s criminal, can I? Can I please, Y/N?” he asked, practically begged. 

“Sure, knock yourself out,” you said, moving to pull your shorts down when he stopped you. 

“Allow me,” Jungkook said, taking your shorts off and leaving your panties where they were. You raised a brow at him but he shook his head and laid down on his stomach. You laid back in the pillows and tried to keep yourself under control. His eyes, the way he looked at you. Would you ever be able to let him go after this? It was already excruciating to think about, but now? After you gave him a piece of yourself? 

Jungkook placed a warm kiss to your center, making you breathe in sharply. Jungkook licked over the fabric of your panties softly, as if touching you directly might be too much. It was something else to watch him pleasure you. His focus was turned to one thing only, and you could feel your stomach clench when he nipped at your underwear with a gentle bite. He kept licking, as if he could taste you through your panties, but soon he was using his teeth to pull them off of you. It made your head spin, the look in his eyes, the way he moved and his sounds. He made little whimpering noises as he licked at you, something that turned you on immensely. 

“Jungkook, please,” you whispered, wanting to feel his tongue directly on your center. 

“I’m just taking my time, Y/N, did you want something more?” he asked, a smirk plastered across his face. You frowned slightly, but nodded anyways. 

“I want more,” you agreed, feeling the intoxicating buzz of lust through your veins. Jungkook smiled and finally pulled your panties free of your legs. Looking directly as your soaked center had Jungkook weak in the knees. You looked so beautiful like this, spread out like a five course meal, just for him. 

“I’ll give you what you need, little one,” he promised, coming forward and putting your legs over his shoulders. You waited as he seemed to hone in on you, eyes dilating even more if that was possible. Jungkook seemed as though he were a ravenous beast one minute, then the next a man who wanted to treat you like a queen. The duality was throwing you for a loop, but you held onto the sheets firmly, knowing that you wanted this.

Finally, after what felt like a century, Jungkook’s mouth met your pussy. Jungkook moaned at the taste, you were just as good as he was hoping you’d be. A sharp cry came from your throat before you could stop it. Jungkook jolted in surprise, moving away from you reluctantly. 

“Are you okay?” he asked, rubbing your thigh to comfort you.

“I-I wasn’t expecting it to feel like that, I’m fine, keep going,” you urged, Jungkook nodded and went right back to pleasuring you. His tongue hit you first, the lithe muscle running along your slit in such a manner it had you clenching around nothing. Jungkook was an expert with his mouth, making you writhe in place with his hand on your lower stomach to hold you. But even that was an intimate act, making your body tingle with pleasure. 

Jungkook made a fat lick up your center, making you cry out for him. His hands were gentle, yet firm as he played your body like an instrument. Making music that was for his ears only. Your taste and the way your body felt against his... It was almost like a drug, possibly more potent. Jungkook moved his tongue further against you, slipping down towards your entrance. Gently, he probed at you. You whimpered and whined at the sensation, feeling his wet muscle flexing against your quivering heat. 

“J-Jungkook,” you croaked, looking at him with sparkles in your eyes. 

Something constricted in Jungkook’s chest then. The way you were looking at him, how he’d never seen anything like it before. No one looked at him like that. But your eyes never lied. Not to him. He had to see what you looked like when you came. He needed it, like an addict needed a fix. Listening to your body he moved his tongue up towards your clit, licking harsher against it, and slowly inserting a single finger into your wetness. 

“Ah!” you cried out, looking up at the ceiling. 

“Don’t take your eyes off me, not for a second,” Jungkook warned, smirking as he continued his assault on your womanhood. You looked at him, watching his glistening face in the low light of the bedroom. You could feel the coil of an orgasm forming in the pit of your stomach. You were so close, Jungkook’s finger playing with your insides like a delicate flower. But the way he moaned against your skin made you almost want to faint. Thank God you were laying down. 

“Ah-hah! Jungkook please,” you begged. 

“What do you want? I need your words,” he said, teasing you slowly.

“Please make me cum, Jungkook, please,” you whimpered, wanting the sensation of an orgasm so badly that you could practically taste it. 

“I’ll take care of you,” he said, shoving his finger deep inside of you and sucking on your clit harshly. 

“Ah!” you cried out, gripping the sheets tightly between your fists. 

“Cum all over this bed, Y/N,” he almost begged. 

With those words burned into your mind you let go, cumming all over his finger and mouth. Jungkook cooed at you, whispering how you were so good for him. It made your heart pound and head spin at how badly you wanted him. The orgasm you just had left you aching for more, and Jungkook could tell.

“Not finished yet are we baby?” He asked, smiling at you.

You shook your head. Looking into his eyes, that were sparkling in the low light. A weird twinge in your stomach made you pause, but you didn’t think much of it. There were more pressing matters right now.

“I’m ready Jungkook, if you are,” you said softly.

“Okay, let me just... Condoms, I don’t have any condoms,” he whimpered. 

“I have an IUD, are you clean?” you asked.

“I am,” he answered, truthfully.

“Okay, then what are you waiting for?” 

Jungkook didn’t answer, he just lined himself up with your almost embarrassingly wet center. He smacked your clit with his length a few times, making your hips jolt lightly. A dark chuckle came from him, before he pushed in slowly. The stretch was... significant. You hadn’t had sex in so long, and your previous partners have been less than cordial it appears. Because you had no idea sex could feel like... like this. Soon, Jungkook was bottomed out inside of you. His back arched lightly, face scrunched up in what appeared to be some kind of acute pain but you knew it was pleasure. Jungkook ground against you lightly, rubbing your overstimulated clit with his pelvis. 

“Jungkook,” you breathed out, gripping his shoulders.

“Yeah? Need a second?” he asked.

“Just a little bit,” you said, eyes trailing down his defined chest and down to where the two of you were joined. It sent a pulse of pleasure through you. Making you clench around Jungkook’s hot cock. He moaned at the sensation, dropping his head. 

“Tell me when,” he moaned out. 

You tried to relax your muscles, but you were so full it was hard to think of anything else. Jungkook waited patiently, kissing your neck slowly, up to your lips and kissing you gently. You brought your hands up to his face and brushed away the hair from his forehead. 

Finally, you nodded, and Jungkook almost lost himself. Slowly, he pulled out, making your stomach twinge in discomfort, but when he pushed back in, you felt a rush of pleasure go up your spine. Jungkook hissed in air through his teeth.

“Fuck you’re so tight,” he moaned into the humid air.

“Jungkook,” you whined, gripping his shoulder tightly.

“It’s alright, I’ve got you,” he encouraged, moving forward and pushing his hips to yours again. You felt a wrenched moan escape you as Jungkook pulled out slowly yet again. 

“F-Faster, please,” you begged. Jungkook gazed into your eyes for a moment.

“Are you sure?” he asked, stilling his movements.

“Yes, please go faster,” you felt your tone go higher pitched. And Jungkook seemed to notice your urgency and began to move his hips faster. You could feel the pleasure coursing over you in waves. Everytime Jungkook’s hips met your own, you felt yourself tighten around him. He moaned out his pleasure, kissing your chin and throat messily. 

You couldn’t keep yourself from moaning, the sensations were too much. Jungkook reached up and palmed your breast, tweaking the nipple lightly, making a jolt of bliss shoot through your body. You arched into his touch, making soft noises as he continued pounding you wet heat. Jungkook was very vocal during sex, making grunting sounds or whispering dirty things into your ears. It made you wetter and wetter when he spoke like that, something you weren’t expecting to enjoy.

“Fuck you’re so good to me, letting me fuck you like this. God you're so beautiful,” he whispered, moaning at the end as he ground his hips against your pelvis, stimulating your already throbbing clit. Jungkook kept pawing at your breast, arousing you further. 

You weren’t sure how much more you could take, between Jungkook’s incessant pounding that was turning your legs to jelly and the way that he was looking at you. As if you were giving him something precious, it made your heart continue to melt. Letting him in that much further... But your heart was beating in your ears so loudly that it made your head spin. Jungkook cradled your face with his palm, making you look at him.

“Look at me, let me see how perfect you are when you cum,” he almost pleaded with you. Inhaling deeply you looked into his eyes and saw him. Seemingly for the first time. He was gazing at you with such raw emotion that it made you unsure. For the first time in a long time, you weren’t sure of your feelings. Jungkook here, in your arms felt... Right somehow. It felt as if this is where you both belonged. With each other.

You tried desperately to get these thoughts out of your head, but Jungkook’s whining melted you to a point that you couldn’t help but uttering the words.

“I need you,” you whispered, so quietly you barely heard it. But Jungkook heard it loud in clear. So much so that he stopped moving. 

He wasn’t looking at you, but rather gazing down at your stomach. You felt the tension in the air. You were about to apologize when lips came crashing down upon yours. Jungkook didn’t kiss you like he had before. It was different somehow. As if you two were finally able to kiss. 

And boy, did he kiss you.

“I need you too, so much,” Jungkook breathed against your lips.

“Jungkook I don’t know why I said that,” you said, trying so desperately to backpedal. But it was too late. Jungkook smiled, and pushed into harshly.

“I know, and it’s okay if you don’t see it yet. I’ll wait,” he promised.

“Jungkook, we need to-ah!” you cried out when he reached down and rubbed your clit with his thumb. Smiling, almost cruelly at your pleasure, Jungkook came back down to place a kiss against your breast bone. Feeling a sudden rush of emotion you cradled his head to you, not wanting him to move.

He picked up on your sudden shift and brought his lips to yours, comforting you. You accepted his motions, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him closer. His chest touched yours and you could feel how fast his heart was beating. It was racing, as if he were running a race. 

“Jungkook, are you okay?” you asked, brushing his sweaty hair from his face. 

“Yeah, I’m good. Just, wanna cum,” he coughed. You made a face, but he ignored it, moving to pull out of you. 

“What are you-”

“Can we try another position?” he asked, slowly pumping his cock. 

“Yes,” you said, breathless at the sight of him. 

“Okay, wanna ride me?” he questioned. 

“Yes,” you said, moving forward to push him down on his back. Liking the idea of having more control, you crawled and took his cock in your hand, moving it up and down on his slick shaft. He hissed at the feeling of your warm hand on him. Looking down at him, you smiled softly. 

Shuffling forward on your knees you lined him up with your entrance and slowly settled down on your haunches, full of him. Tilting your head back you let the sensations overwhelm and excite you. Moving your hips up slowly, you watched him. His eyes were lidded, gazing at the place where you two were joined in an acute fixation. His eyes seemed to be glued there. Watched as your hungry cunt swallowed him more and more until he bottomed out.

“Feels so good, Jungkook,” you breathed, reaching up and gripping your breast tightly. 

Jungkook moaned his agreement. Licking his kiss swollen lips. You leaned down and licked a stripe from the base of his throat to the entrance of his mouth. Kissing him firmly you moved your hips harsher against him, grinding down and swirling them to bring you both insurmountable pleasure. 

“Fuck, Y/N, make me cum,” he begged. Looking down at him, you nodded, feeling the sensation building up in you as well. 

With a certain lack of precision you ground against him, bouncing and moaning. Jungkook reached up and steadied your hips, bringing you forward and moving his hips up to bring you both bliss. Jungkook was sweating and you could feel your legs starting to give out. But you could almost taste your orgasm, wanting it so badly. 

“So close, so close,” you said, panting with the effort. 

“Me too, keep going,” he encouraged, pulling you down to his chest and using the leverage to pound into your weeping pussy.

“God Jungkook don’t stop,” you begged. 

“Feels so good,” he breathed.

Jungkook was continuously hitting a spot inside you that made stars appear in your vision, and with one more push you came crumbling down. Jungkook finished not shortly after, making warmth bloom in your stomach. 

You collapsed onto his chest, breathing harshly. Your throat hurt from breathing so hard, but your boneless body didn’t seem to care. Jungkook kissed your head, threading his fingers through your sweaty hair. 

He pulled out a few moments later, making you wince, but you were too tired to care.

Jungkook moved to leave, when you grabbed his hand. 

“Don’t leave me,” you whispered, feeling surprisingly vulnerable after what just transpired. Jungkook smiled and laid back down. You crawled up and laid down on his chest. 

“Never,” he answered. 

But, as you fell asleep, you couldn’t shake the sense of dread you felt piling up in your stomach.

[dameronology]

home {poe dameron x reader}

summary: poe made a promise to always come home, and it’s one he’s determined to keep

warnings: swearing, mentions of injuries 

more hurt/comfort fluff?? i almost sent myself off to sleep writing this bc of the ending and bc i am shattered. anyhoo, enjoy!

- jazz

p.s i skimmed this, but it has not been properly proof read haha oops pls bare with me, i will do it in the morning 

It had only been five days. 

You’d been apart from Poe for far longer than that; sometimes weeks, sometimes months. It was just part of being in the Resistance, and something you both knew you had to do, but it didn’t make it any easier. You must have had some pretty foul luck to have met the love of your life during a time in which the galaxy insisted on keeping you apart - but one look at the pilot, and all that faded away. He always made it home to you, no matter what. He’d made that promise to you pretty early in the relationship, and you knew it to be true. You could never doubt Poe. 

The Blue Squadron was due back to base at midday; the mission had been pretty secretive, so the comms lines had been shut most the time. Even after begging Leia to let you man the singular one that connected you to Poe, she’d refused, knowing it would only make things worst. The General only ever spoke from experience, and she had plenty in waiting around for cocky pilots. Whilst Poe was arguably a little less reckless than Han, she knew that you would both act as a distraction to one another’s work. You were equally important to the Resistance, and she couldn’t have you moping about on a commslink for hours a day. The joke was on her for that one, because you still moped, even when you weren’t trying to reach your guy. 

 ‘What time is it?’ You asked Finn. 

‘11.56.’ He glanced over at you, eyebrows raised. ‘So the same time as when you asked thirty seconds ago.’ 

‘I’m just anxious.’ You grumbled. ‘I’ve been so lonely the last five days.’

‘You mean the last five days that you’ve spent with me?’

‘Hey, it’s nothing personal!’ You nudged him in the ribs. ‘You miss him too.’

‘I do.’ Finn nodded. ‘We really are just a pair of simps.’

‘Friends who simp together, stay together.’ You grinned. ‘And if me and Poe ever break up, you have first dibs.’

‘Same for you, if Rey and I ever break up-’

‘- that would require you getting together in the first place.’ You reminded him. Finn could only scowl in response. 

‘I’m trying!’ He held his hands up in defense. ‘It’s just complicated.’

‘Nothing’s complicat - they’re here!’ 

You leapt off the crate you’d been sat on, sprinting across the hangar to where a fleet of X-Wings were grouping. Jess came in first, followed by Snap, and then Kare. Poe’s jet was the last to come in, which was unusual for him. He almost always lead the squad - aside from the time he’d managed to blow an engine and had to call you out to tow him back (it’s how you’d met, actually). Bar a few new dents and scratches, his jet looked to be in decent condition, with BB-8 whirring away from where he was perched in the back. You took that to be a good sign, even if he’d been the last to get in. 

A crowd of mechanics reached the fleet before you, tools in hand and ready to repair whatever damage the First Order had thrown at them. You gave Jess a smile and a high five as you passed, but your line of sight was dead set on finding the curly-haired pilot. You had to elbow your way through the crowd, heartbeat picking up as you did. Man, you’d missed him. The last few weeks had been rough for you both and being constantly pulled apart only made it worst. All you wanted to do was to see him, to hug him and-

- You hit Poe with a thud, chests colliding. He immediately wrapped you up in his arms, pulling you tightly against his chest and burying his head against yours. He smelt faintly of jet fuel and smoke, which was fitting. 

His lips were on yours the minute he’d let you go, hands tightly gripping your cheeks as he kissed you with all his might. Yeah, he’d missed you too.

‘Hey, baby.’ You couldn’t help but smile, eyes finally meeting - it didn’t last long though, not when you saw the state of his face. ‘Oh my god. Your eye! And your lip! And-’

‘- I missed you.’ Poe brushed it aside, pressing another exhausted kiss to your lips.   

‘I missed you too.’ You softly sighed. ‘The fuck happened to your face, though?’

‘Just...First Order stuff.’ He bit his lip, brown eyes falling to the floor. 

You sighed. ‘Shit, Poe.’ 

‘I know. He gently nodded. ‘I’m okay though. I’m here with you. That’s the important thing.’

‘You’re right.’ You agreed. ‘C’mon, I’ll take you to medical-’

He cut you off with a groan. ‘Let’s just go back to my room. Please?’ 

‘But your face.’ You gently ghosted a thumb across his bruised cheek, flinching when he shuddered slightly. ‘I mean...I have a first aid kit. I can always take a crack at it.’

‘That sounds a lot nicer than those nurse droids.’ He smiled. 

‘But you have to promise to get checked over tomorrow, okay?’

‘I promise.’

Poe flung his arm across your shoulders, pulling you into his side as you headed out the hangar. His own room was actually in the opposite direction, but he practically lived with you in yours. It always felt so much nicer. You’d managed to make it a lot homier, with photos of the two of you and fairy lights strung up. The scent of your perfume always lingered in the air and sleeping in your bed was the closest he could get to you when you were away on missions. In return, he left his jumpers and hoodies laying around for you to have free reign of. It was a weak form of paying rent, but he hadn’t heard any arguments. 

You could tell that Poe was tired from the way he walked. He usually had a swagger in his step, smiling at everyone who passed. Now, he was leaning on you for support, dark eyes staring dead ahead with exhaustion, his brain working at a thousand miles an hour to process what he’d witnessed over the last few days. You’d been on his mind the entire time.

‘Here we go.’ You gently lead him to the bed, helping him shrug off his charred flight suit. He caught your lips in a chaste kiss as you moved it off his shoulders, hands suddenly grabbing yours. 

‘You know I love you, right?’

‘Of course. I love you too.’ You murmured. ‘Is something up?’

Poe pulled you down onto the bed beside him, eyes finally meeting yours. ‘I just...I got captured on the mission. Very briefly, but still. It was scary, and there was a moment when I wasn’t sure I was gonna make it back.’

‘Poe.’ Your breath caught in your throat. ‘Is that why your face is all...’

‘Like this?’ He chuckled slightly. ‘Yeah. I’m sorry.’

‘Hey, don’t be.’ You squeezed his hands. ‘It’s not your fault, and like you said earlier, the important thing is that you here now.’

‘I know, but I promised you, didn’t I? That I’d always come home?’

‘And you did.’ You pressed a soft kiss to his cheek. ‘Now c’mon, I gotta stitch you up before this scars.’

‘I reckon I’d look hot with a couple battle scars, y’know.’

‘You would, but I’d rather you not bleed out all over my sheets for the sake of vanity.’ You smiled. 

Digging out your first aid kit, you grabbed a few cotton swabs and some bacta spray. You weren’t a nurse, but your medical skills weren’t terrible either. After a few too many injuries and close calls out in the field, you’d learnt the basics. Half of the scars on Poe’s body had been from your handiwork after he’d been injured -- some of them were a little wonky, but he hadn’t died yet, so you figured you’d done a decent job. The ones he’d done for you were much neater but in your defense, he was reckless as fuck and had a ton more experience in dealing with injuries. 

On the bright side, Poe’s torso seemed fine and relatively uninjured. The white shirt he was wearing was only smeared with soot from the blaster fire, and his bare arms were broad and uninjured, save for one scrape on his left bicep. Okay, maybe the broad part wasn’t relevant to the context, but it was definitely relevant on the whole. He did have good arms. You only ever truly felt safe when they were wrapped around you.

‘This might sting a little bit.’ You crouched between his legs, pouring a little bit of bacta spray onto the cotton swab. You gently wiped it across his forehead, doing a double take when he let out a hiss of pain. ‘You okay, baby?’

‘Yeah, I’m good.’ Poe’s eyes met yours, and he gave you a half smile. ‘Better now that you’re here.’

It didn’t take too long to clean up the rest of his cuts and bruises; they were relatively minor given what he’d been through. The last time he’d been caught by the First Order on Jakku, he’d come home ten times worse than this. You’d spent days by his side in the medical room, mostly chiding him for how funny he looked in the bactasuit, but also to offer emotional support. The duality of love. 

You finished up by wrapping a bandage around the cut on his left arm, gently tying it in place with a safety pin. It was enough to keep it clean and safe until tomorrow, when you’d hopefully be able to convince him to see an actual nurse. You knew that for now, he was tired and probably just wanted to rest. His eyes were sunken with tiredness, and his body had become more and more slumped as you’d gone about cleaning him up. Poe never slept well on missions; a mixture of anxiety and your absence always made for a bad night’s sleep. 

‘That should keep you in one piece for now.’ You said, running a hand through his hair. Poe leant into your touch, pressing a kiss to your wrist. ‘You should get some sleep.’

‘Mmm.’ He murmured. ‘You’re staying, right?’

'Absolutely.’ You offered him a soft smile. ‘Gotta lose the boots though. These are clean sheets.’

‘Can you do it for me?’ He asked, flopping back against the mattress. 

You rolled your eyes at his...Poe-ness, before leaning down and unzipping his shoes, tossing them in a pile across the room. Yours joined them, followed by your jacket and the crumpled flight suit. That was something else to worry about tomorrow. For now, your main focus was him. 

Poe climbed under the covers, shuffling across to make room for you. He reached out to you as you joined him, naturally wrapping his arms around your shoulders and pulling you into his side. The tiredness really hit him then, and you could feel his body untense as you pressed a kiss to his jaw. His body was warm against yours, which was a welcome contrast after sleeping alone for the last few nights. 

‘I love you.’ Poe murmured quietly. 

‘I love you too.’ You peered up at him with a smile. 

‘And I’ll always come home to you.’ He gave your shoulders a light squeeze. ‘You know that, right?’

‘I do.’

‘I’ll never break a promise to you.’

‘I know.’ You softly sighed, trying to move closer to him (as though it were even possible).

It was hard for him to fight the exhaustion now that he was laying with you -- after a few moments, his breathing became a little deeper, and his grip on you a little looser. You pressed one last kiss to his cheek, before settling back against his side and letting sleep over take you. 

[peachy-inserts]

𝕙𝕢 𝕓𝕠𝕪𝕤 𝕒𝕟𝕕 𝕗𝕒𝕝𝕝

✉︎ request: n/a

✰warnings: none. fluff!

✎a/n: please i made myself cry over asahi during this i love him so much

➳ᴅᴀɪᴄʜɪ, ᴀꜱᴀʜɪ, ɪᴡᴀɪᴢᴜᴍɪ, ᴏɪᴋᴀᴡᴀ, ᴛᴀɴᴀᴋᴀ, ᴛꜱᴜᴋɪꜱʜɪᴍᴀ, ꜱᴜɢᴀᴡᴀʀᴀ, ʙᴏᴋᴜᴛᴏ, ᴋᴜʀᴏᴏ, ɴɪꜱʜɪɴᴏʏᴀ, ᴜꜱʜɪᴊɪᴍᴀ

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✰Daichi loves to bake with you. He hopes on the pumpkin spice wagon just because it means there’s an excuse for the two of you to make something together in the kitchen, but there are times when he just wants you to feed him. He’s an absolute glutton this time of year, both for sweets and for you. Also, coffee dates! Loves taking strolls with you in the crisp fall weather and warming up with a hot drink, though one time he spilled his latte all over his lap because he was so focused on the way your nose scrunched in delight and fingers tapped against your styrofoam cup at the sweetness of the beverage that he completely missed his mouth. Of course, this only ended with you spitting your drink out all over his front and the table

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✰Asahi always makes sure you’re warm. The sudden and drastic change in weather makes his bones ache, maybe it’s because of his old soul, or maybe (as you tease him) his body just can’t keep up with its own size. When you leave the house together, he takes his time to wrap the scarf his mother knit for you around your neck with care, tucking it gently into the folds of your jacket so the scratchy yarn doesn’t irritate your skin, already dry and chapped from the cold. He’s a human radiator, though, and often goes out with as little as a sweatshirt with nothing underneath, to which you call him a hypocrite for. You know, though, that you’ll end up clinging to him against the wind while he laughs and comments on how he isn’t at all cold while you shiver under his hold

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✰Iwaizumi takes you to pick out pumpkins. He drapes his heavy tan coat over your shoulders as you stand idly with your arms crossed and tucked under each other for warmth, him taking far too long and being far too picky in his selection process. He looks like a dad with the way he insects every pumpkin, knocking on it a few times before shaking his head and moving on. You can’t help but admire the way his biceps flex as he struggles to carry the numerous pumpkins you had chosen, despite your efforts to help him. You only carve a few of them, though, and the rest are placed around them. When they rot, you break them apart to discard and jokingly mention that he should chuck the pieces at Oikawa, but he takes you a little too seriously

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✰Tanaka takes you to a corn maze. On the way there, you take a tractor ride and he lays his coat down before you sit so that the hay doesn’t poke through your jeans, although he looks panicked in doing so, and practically rips his entire outfit off in his eagerness to be a gentleman for you. The ride is faster than anticipated, though, and now missing his outermost layer, he clings to you for warmth. You get lost in the maze and end up being yelled at by an old woman for cutting through the crops, so he hoists you onto his shoulders to scout for an exit. The two of you end up speedrunning the whole maze, and you laugh hysterically while teetering back and forth and clutching the top of his head for support, stealing his beanie for yourself.

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✰Oikawa takes you on a shopping spree. You both indulge in the latest fall fashions, and although he intended to choose a few pieces for himself can’t help but search frantically for items that you’d enjoy, and that he’d certainly enjoy to see on you. He doesn’t let you leave the shopping mall without a new waist coat, one that matches his but doesn’t clash with your shoes and compliments your eyes, two pairs of boots, and a comfortable hat that you look absolutely adorable in, the cinch of it’s fabric material drawing your hair down flat beside your cheeks and accenting your nose, which he can’t go a day without peppering soft kisses onto; usually in the morning when the sun has just hit your face. He loves to see you glow like rudolph, and it’s one of his favorite features

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✰Tsukishima invites you to his family’s thanksgiving. It’s a big deal for him, who usually separates his interpersonal relationships from his home life, and although he’s flustered, does the best he can to make you feel welcomed in his house. Despite his typical cold attitude, something that you are not spared from, it’s better to be kind to you than be publicly lectured by his mother for not being courteous to you, especially when most of his family is meeting you for the first time. Not that he doesn’t mind being kind to you in the first place, but he’ll save the teasing for another day; right now, this is a test for him. When he walks you home after you’ve stuffed yourself full, he’s extremely relieved, and thanks you for coming along. You know this is a big step for him, and that it can only mean you hold a special place in his heart

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✰Sugawara learns to crochet, just for you. He stays up late watching youtube videos, and although the awkward positions he twists his hands into just to finally get a yarn over on the hook make his joints ache and cramp, he works vigilantly at making you a matching set consisting of a scarf, headband, and pair of mittens. The stitching is loose and uneven, and you can’t really tell if he actually used a pattern or not, but it’s so heartwarming and thoughtful that you simply can’t get by without wearing it at least once. The same night he presents you with this set, you go out to a haunted maze, and you’re wearing each piece proudly. He spends the whole time creeping behind you trying to get you to scream, though, with a phone in hand, and you’re reminded of his pesky duality and the tendency to wreak havoc and stroll away carelessly

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✰Bokuto takes you on a ghost trail. He takes you here with the intention of being your knight in shining armor, but you swear he’s going to break your hand with how hard he squeeze it every time there’s a particularly loud gust of wind, the kind that whispers behind your ears and rustles the trees. He’s caught off guard by its low hissing, and when a crisp red leaf falls on top of his head he yelps, hoisting you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes and breaking into a run before you lower yourself and stop him in his tracks. You decide to leave, after that, and stop by the vendor at the entrance for candied apples. Hey, at least he took you with him instead of using you as a shield, right?

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✰Ushijima arranges a ride through the countryside. You clamber into the back of an old, rusted pickup truck with him, and he lets you use his hand as leverage to hop into the bed, which has been covered in hay. You pass by fields of corn, and excitedly point out every horse you see to him, and although his only response is a low hum, you can see the way he smiles softly, genuinely, at you out of the corner of your eye. You lean over the wheels a few times to get a better look at the scene, and he instinctively reaches out to steady your legs so you don’t fall over

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✰Nishinoya goes trick or treating with you. He’s planned out several routes in case someone calls him out for being so old and asking for candy, so you always have another place to go and start over. When he’s rejected too many times, he has the ingenious idea to drag Hinata along with you two and tell people that he’s your son. It doesn’t work out exactly that way, though, and you find yourself being asked if you’re really just babysitting the two. Hey, at least he got what he came for though, right?

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✰Kuroo goes apple picking with you. When you mention how they would make a good pie, he somehow ends up rambling on about the chemical properties in the pie crust you find on pinterest, and how it’s more likely to burn, how you shouldn’t add that much brown sugar, and on and on and on until you finally find something to distract him. He pulls the branches down for you, but only after you’ve hopped up towards it a few times. He pulls a twig off and uses it to smack your head, teasing you for being so short compared to him

[practicalmagicintuitions]

HC reading

DISCLAIMER: If you will send me an Anon, I will answer the same tone as your ask, opinion is written.

All information and statements made in this reading or any other post of mine are all alleged until proven to be fact and for entertainment purposes & usage only. All information stated is based on my intuition and my tarot cards. Opinion only. The readings have no intention to cause any harm to the individuals, people featured in it.

Cards pulled on 19th September

I barely thought about the question The Moon and the 2 of Pentacles felt out. I was thinking a little because I haven’t thought about that question deeply yet, but I decided to keep that 2 cards as a summary of the reading and go back to it if I don’t understand something and the very end of the reading.

My question was how his next few weeks will look like.

Queen of Cups rx, Death rx,( clarified by the King of Cups and the Devil rx - both fell out so I kept both) 5 of Swords, 3 of Swords rx, 10 of Swords rx, Knight of cups rx

What I see is a lot of balancing, wanting something but resisting the change at the same time. Inner and outer battles.

Death rx could be many things one of it is resisting to change, something couldn’t come to its end. For example, a relationship is over but they cannot move on, stuck in. And I think they cannot really move on because they have some codependency between them (QofCrx). If this card represents a person, they are someone who cannot control their emotions, mood swings, hypersensitive to criticism etc. This also could mean heartbreak. I think the truth is the blend of this. There is this emotional insecurity and neediness that is not let something reach its end. Denying your own feeling to make someone else happy. New energies, new impulses don’t reach him and he is operating on those old ones that should be let go. He is somewhat lying to himself that he can juggle between new and old, that he can grow but can remain the same. On a physical level that could mean depression, sleep deprivation.

However, these two-card is facing each other like in a battle when the oppositions are ready to attack. So I think before he can move on or he can battle for some change he has to face the forces that don’t let him choose or move on (QofCrx. It could be another person or one part of himself) The next card is the 5 of Swords. 5 of S is a change, a battle, a battle coming to an end card and top of that his card suggests very strongly a bulling person or situation. Ungraceful win or mental suffering. With this card is very important that who you identified yourself with on the picture. The bigger figure, who won, who has a smug smile, who probably a bully and won unfairly, or the 2 little figures, who are defeated, humiliated, bullied. 

5ofS is losing the moral compass and integrity and I feel this could be a realization of his that he reached that point. He lost those things, his moral values and wants to break free (Devil rx) but he is stuck. Maybe he has to balance between his own mood swing or someone else’s. 

With those conflicting emotions, thoughts, I feel he is in an early phase of transition. This King (King of Cups) is emotionally responsible and with the Devil rx maybe he wants to break free from some emotional attachments. The King of C is the pleaser, the father figure, the dominant one so maybe somehow his father is playing some role in it.

Death rx is a very interesting card because if we think the upright is about rebirth the reverse should be about being stuck, not remain the same but Mary K Greer is saying this card could mean “emerging from the death” coming out from a stagnant period. (keep this meaning in your mind it will be important at the end!)  And I think the Devil rx is supporting this meaning but those cards as a whole suggest for me such an inner conflict, battling with yourself, what to do, what to decide. As the song says “ Should I stay or should I go”? 

5 of Sw, 3 of Sw rx, 10 of Sw rx, Knight of C rx

In this whole spread, there are cups and swords. Heart vs mind, emotions vs logic and a clear head

Both 3 and 10 of Sw rx means healing, escaping from something fatal (NOT necessarily in a death-life situation!! more like on an emotional, metaphysical level as Death card doesn’t mean physical death ), the swords are falling out. But that doesn’t mean the experiences or the process is not painful. Oh boy… it is, it is painful. but instead of the light end of the tunnel is a train it’s like…. we can still have hope it’s not a train. 

What a little worries me is the Knight of Cups rx because this is again, juggling, mood swings between seeing the positive aspect of this or feeling sulky and moody. With this RX  knight the problem is that he is overly romantic, daydreaming or the opposite, he feels everyone is leaving him and reject him. He is in emotional turmoil. And I feel even he won his inner battles and start to heal he will check back to the past. Not necessarily reconnect with an old flame but starting to live in the past and asking “what if…?” and starting to replay the past decisions, emotions and those are not healthy.  I think all of those will leave him emotionally insecure and confused. 

The relationship now (at the time of the reading)

2 cards felt out face down and when I flipped the first it was the Lovers. And I was WOW that is something new, how exciting, second was the World rx. I pulled 2 clarifications on the Lovers: the Empress rx and the Strength. First, let’s see these 4 cards. 

When I was thinking about the Lovers card’s sudden appearance after 6 months in the first time I felt (because of the other cards) that some seducing going on like they were doing it when I pulled the cards or some other games were going on like she was trying to convince him about something and she was seducing him to get what she wants.

The World rx is unfinished business, no closure, something is not finished yet, unfulfillment. 

I think she (because Emprx is always her in my readings) feels that this relationship is not dead yet or she is not ready to give up. Look at the Strength card. There is a woman, taming a lion, a beast with her, kindness, will, determination etc. This card is also the first card in the second set of sevens we can separate the Major arcana (1-7, 8-14, 15-21), so it could mean a new chapter too. I feel this is what she wants very badly. However, in this situation, the question is who has the real strength? Maybe she is on her way to use convincing tactics but in real life, she wants something HC has or something that she cannot get if he doesn’t want to give. And I think this is the relationship itself or some aspect of it.  

The World rx  is still not a bad card could mean success but that success is not what you wanted or how you imagines it. There is a serious anticlimax here. And it’s a very short-lived success, if at all. So no matter what female tactics she uses for keeping alive the relationship if HC doesn’t want to give the relationship another round, she can do anything, she won’t succeed.

On a very direct level, it could mean that the whole world is watching them and she feels the pressure of it “the world’s burden on her shoulders” Maybe there is a lost connection and she wants to make up this with sex or being physical. 

With the Emp rx and the Strength, I see a serious manipulation going on. 

The rest of this spread is The High Priestess, 2 of Swords rx, Ace of wands rx. If you want to imagine the “spread” it’s 5 cards, HP in the middle, on the left the Lovers ( without signifiers) and the World rx, on the right the 2ofSrx, AceofWrx .

Why is this important? I am studying the HP atm because for me this is the most fascinating card, I always have a hard time interpreting. Many people saying this is a secretive woman, someone with secrets etc...I think this is such a simplifying way to handle this card. HP is not secretive in a gossipy, mean girl way or someone who is cheating etc. She doesn’t share her knowledge because we are not ready, not because she is enjoying that she knows something we don’t. She is a gatekeeper. On the card, she is sitting before a veil (veil between the worlds), she has some sacred text in her lap. In the RWS deck, this is the Tora, in my personal deck, this is the Book of Shadows. She is aware of those deep truths, ancient knowledge. This is not some simple secret or gossip.The High Priestess wisdom in the light in the Hermit’s lamp that separates him from the complete darkness and shows him the path he has to choose.  On the veil, there are pomegranates that link her to Persephone whose faith was living between two worlds. She keeps those worlds apart.  (this was my short essay on The High Priestess for you,welcome :D )

So what is the significance of all of this? That I think in the spread THP separates the thing NV wants to achieve and the truth or the thing she wants to avoid. On the left there is the manipulation, the seducing, trying to tame the beast, trying to make it sexual again on the right distance in a relationship, cold heart, love cannot come through because of the crossed swords, no sexual desire (Ace of Wrx). A of Wrx is infertility, impotency or not wanting the other sexually anymore. This card upright is a phallic symbol that’s why it is connected to sexuality, fertility, pregnancy, in reverse not just the lack of this but a thumb down too. It’s like giving a thumb down to the relationship and this is not just an “ I don’t like something”.In ancient times that means a death sentence to gladiators. It’s like the death sentence of this relationship. And I feel very symbolic that the first card was the Lovers and the last is this in this spread. A polar opposite in meaning that is separated by THP. The HP is not passive, he is the epitome of eternal stillness, the boundaries between two extremes. I feel this relationship like the whole reading is about duality ( 2ofPent, 2ofSw, THP, Judgment) as the first row of this reading, swords vs cups, mind vs emotions. These two things are battling in him.

The outcome of this relationship

Judgment, 3 of cups rx.

Numerologically the Judgment (XX 20=2+0=2)

On the Judgment card, an angel blows her trumpet and people rise up from their coffins. Do you remember what I said about the Death rx?  That one meaning of this is “emerging from the death”. Clarity, decision made, realization, powerful understanding. Also means huge transformation. In a relationship could be a Karmic connection. With the 3ofC rx is the realisation that the relationship is no fun anymore. More work than joy. I don’t mean “it’s a pr “, I mean their time together is less fun more work in the relationship. Or no matter how much they try the fun is just lost.( for example they can have sex, the real desire is gone) Also, this is the drinking card so maybe the realisation they over partied and drank way too much in this relationship and they don’t like each other that much if they are sober. Also could mean infidelity or a third weel in not necessarily a cheating sense, for example, one of them has a friend/parent etc and that person is so involved and present in the relationship that the other feels it’s a third party in this. This card also means no reconnection, mistrust.

I think the theme of this relationship and his next few weeks is balancing and trying to conquer himself. Battling between mind and heart, logic reason and emotions. 

This reading has a 2nd part, I pulled some cards on 30th.

For now, I will only reveal from that reading one thing. I asked about timing and breakup. I got the 5 of Swords. So this card means October 3 times. How is this possible? 

1.Methond - days, weeks, months, years

Swords are weeks, so this card means 5 weeks from 19th September

2.Method Seasons

Swords means Autumn. October is Autumn.

3.Method Astrological corresponds

Swords : Air signs. Gemini, Libra, Aquarius. 

Libra is September 23 – October 22. 

However, I felt I need a 2nd card, a clarification. It was the Hanged Man. This means, delays, no time period available. I interpret this as the break up will happen in October but we won’t know about it for a while. And yes, I am prepared that she or someone maybe reading this and they will organize something in October, but this doesn’t change the fact that I am getting October SINCE April. That’s why I said in a previous ask that, this is a joke from Universe if they won’t break up in October. 

I hope you enjoyed this reading.

Be blessed. :) 

[mfkinanaa]

CAPRICORN RISING.

Born with Capricorn rising (or on the Ascendant), you may notice a duality in your nature between someone who is, on the one hand, serious, organized and capable, and on the other, uncertain about their ability to achieve all the things they want.

This is a curious combination of capability and caution that usually becomes balanced over time.

The characteristics of Saturn, the ruler of Capricorn, are pronounced – lending you an executive ability, patience and the ability to master difficult tasks, whilst at the same time, generating fear, awkwardness and an inclination toward pessimism or negativity.

Ambition is often strong, but so too can be crippling doubt about your ability to achieve what you set out to do.

Making Your Way To The Top.

When your Ascendant is Capricorn, the mastery of material resources is a prime concern. You may have a tendency to be stern, strict and serious especially – with yourself. You can be far harder on yourself than you are on anyone else. Others may see you as a harsh task master or a capable leader, and you are likely to be well respected owing to your capacity for hard work, pragmatism and prolonged focus.

You need to find ways to make practical and efficient use of the resources that are available to you, and ultimately master your world. To do this, you need to cautiously plan and structure your approach in order to meet the voice of responsibility inside of you, urging you on toward success and achievement.

Treating yourself as you would a member of your team will help. Would you punish and criticize others as harshly as you do yourself? In the course of a day you are likely to do ten things, eight of which you will do very well. Yet at the end of the day it is the two you didn’t master, the two that were “less than perfect” that you will remember and recriminate yourself for. Rather than focussing on what you have not yet achieved you need to recognize what you have. Then you will see that you are more than able to fulfill whatever task is at hand, perhaps with a more patient approach?

Patience and Endurance.

Achievements may be slow to come by, but are usually certain, owing to your methodical approach. The sign and house position of the Sun in your chart will give you many clues as to how this happens for you. Saturn, your ruler, is also known as Father Time, teaching valuable lessons through patience, commitment and endurance. Hardship and frustration teach you to refine your ambitions whilst developing long-term staying power. Limits, laws and structures must be recognized and obeyed. There is a need to make something of yourself; and this will become a key driving force. Submitting to the need for order, structure and discipline will lead to long term satisfaction and contentment.

Sometimes the inner expectation that life must be hard for you makes things far more difficult than need be. You meet what you expect in the world, and with Capricorn rising you may secretly expect hardship and limitation to greet you at every turn. These beliefs can lead to difficulty in realising your goals. The belief that life must be hard for you often sets things up so that they are! Learning to appreciate your need for hard work and discipline, without seeing yourself as somehow under the thumb of Cruel Fate, helps. Also putting your ambitions into perspective is a good move.

The Pleasures of Life.

There is more to life than hard work and discipline. The potential to enjoy the physical things of life is also strong. You need to let yourself enjoy the journey, and your potential for sensual pleasure. This of course is much more easily achieved, once the crippling limitations of guilt and self-repression are removed. This Ascendant also brings great responsiveness to the needs and feelings of those you hold close. You will work hard for the people you care about. An ideal partner is one who can provide plenty of nurturing and support as a balance to all the apparent stiffness of the ‘capable’ Capricorn mask.

Publicly, you may come across as reserved. Always aware of status and protocol, you will avoid doing anything that might adversely affect your reputation. You will be aware of decorum and following appropriate social codes, but behind closed doors, another story can emerge. This sign is also associated with the festival of Saturnalia, in honour of Earthly Pleasures and Delights. With Capricorn rising you will find a sense of purpose and inner balance comes through pursuing your ambitions whilst giving plenty of time for recreation. By developing your sensual and practical sides you will find satisfaction, whilst reminding yourself that you are far more capable than you let yourself believe.

The Gift of Capricorn Rising.

You are a work in progress and, in the end, highly likely to succeed. Affirming that you are able to create what you need EASILY while taking time to enjoy life’s pleasures will help to overcome any self-imposed limitations. Through perseverance and faith in your own ability you will eventually reach the summit of your desired achievements. If in doubt, just think about how far you have come. You are a born leader and strategist. 

AQUARIUS RISING.

Born with Aquarius on your Ascendant (or Rising), you will find a clearer sense of individuality is gained by stepping back to look at life from an objective perspective.

A detached point of view allows for a logical assessment of the circumstances around you, giving you the ability to find, at times, lightning fast resolution to key issues.

This is the sign of the collective over the individual, the group over the singular.

You are likely to have an especially broad view on society that allows you to mix with a great variety of people.

Your awareness of group and social dynamics is paramount for your overall self-expression.

Putting group endeavours first may override purely personal concerns.

There is likely to be a pronounced tendency to act in ways that will benefit the collective, rather than provide personal gain.

This then is the rising sign of the true humanitarian, who gets what they need in ways that are socially responsible and considerate.

You may be suited to working with large groups of people, especially organizations or groups that have a humanitarian focus.

You may also be drawn to arenas such as science, politics, communications or human resources, and have a strong social conscience.

Usually open to scientific innovation, you can be an early-adopter or work with advances in technology.

Broadcasting also falls under this sign, and you may have significant talents here.

Heightened Intuition.

When your Ascendant is Aquarius, your intellect may be highly pronounced, and you may also be gifted with a strong intuition – able to see the gestalt of a situation in one moment, then make pinpoint decisions based upon multi-leveled dimensions of information. With sudden flashes of illumination you see the next step, and should learn to trust yourself enough to proceed. The sign and house position of the Sun in your chart will give you many clues as to how and where this happens most for you.

This rising sign is both idealistic yet practical, and concerned with the benefit of the group. You may be somewhat rebellious and unorthodox.This is as it should be, for those with Aquarius rising are meant to “bring to earth” their vision of future worlds. Accordingly, you may suffer at the hands of others because of your apparent eccentricities. You may have played the role of the outsider or someone different from an early age, and become used to following the beat of your own drum. Freedom is important, as it allows you to continue being the rebel or renegade, ready to bring about the unorthodox and new.

Sometimes Aloof.

Sometimes, this level of future orientation does not manifest. You may instead display a serious and calculating demeanour concerned with social position, status and due process. Isolation and autonomy become strategies used to defend yourself against close connection with others. In this instance, care must be taken not to become too rigid and crystallized as the years go by. A resistance to change, together with a shrewdly calculated social response, can lead to arthritic and nervous disorders down the track, as well as heart problems.

Personal development comes about by remembering to honour the special things that make you uniquely you, allowing for passion and joy in your life. Extremes of emotion are not usually comfortable for Aquarius rising, and you may have to learn to value your emotions as essential experiences, rather than a cumbersome and embarrassing inconvenience.

You Are Special Too.

You will find your greatest happiness comes about when you find the love that is lying beneath most outbursts of emotion, discovering that vulnerability is not in fact a sign of weakness. You may at times look down upon others when they seek to be recognized and seen as important, for you have an innate dislike of self-centered behaviours, and a tendency to view emotional neediness as a curious weakness found in lesser beings.

Opening up to the emotional and passionate dimensions of your being helps you to avoid aloofness, and lets you realize that in order to be truly human, you need to respond with both reason and emotion. In this way, you gain a clear understanding, and not just an abstract idea, of what being human is all about.

The Gift of Aquarius Rising.

Life is best met with a sense of hope and a happy vision for the future, knowing that through the right application of ideas and technology, humanity can be evolve. You are likely to take up social causes, supporting the ideals of liberty, fraternity and equality for all. Your sense of equality and ability to connect with all can be one of your greatest assets. Even if you feel different from the rest, you can find the group that is right for you if you share your unique perspective.

PISCES RISING.

Born with Pisces on your Ascendant (or Rising) you are likely to be an especially sensitive individual, with an ability to “pick up on” the unseen influences in your surroundings.

Your sensitivity is in fact both your gift and your challenge.

Learning to recognize the feelings that flow through you for what they are, and then find an outlet for their expression, is required.

There is an inherent challenge around knowing how to project your self into the world.

The need to present a cohesive sense of individuality is at odds with the fluid and elusive qualities of this sign.

With Pisces, the urge is to merge with one’s environment and then transcend boundaries.

You may find yourself asking – “How can I project any clear identity when who I feel I am is so open to change”? For this reason you may find it hard to know what you want to do in life.

You could find yourself going along with whatever the most dominant influence suggests, even if it does not really make you happy.

The Chameleon’s Life.

With Pisces Ascendant, you may feel like a chameleon or “shape-shifter”, changing your personality to adapt to those around you. You may have a sense that no-one really knows who you are – because the image you project keeps changing. You find yourself taking on other people’s personalities because it is so easy to become whatever you think they want you to be. This is great if you are an actor, but makes dealing with the real world somewhat problematic. Discovering the essence of your own individuality, and then developing this is essential for your happiness. Thus, a delicate balance between focus and fluidity, between adapting to others and asserting your self, is required.

This dilemma will be resolved by cultivating the awareness that you are part of something greater than your individual self. You will find your strength by seeing yourself as connected to a greater whole. This may seem like a paradox, but is the essence of Pisces rising. Your journey will remind you that there is more to life than meets meets the eye. Through creativity, spirituality or service you are likely to find a higher truth that will give meaning to your life. The sign and house position of the Sun in your chart will give you many clues as to how this is likely to unfold.

Heightened Sensitivity.

You may be very creative, with a strong imagination. You may have a strong interest in film, photography, drama, dance, music or any kind of abstract artistic expression. Or you may inherent creative gifts which can be cultivated. Developing these talents or interest will benefit you greatly on an emotional level and help you find your way through the world.

Or you may have a strong sense of spirituality, with a keen awareness of the transcendent aspects of life. Through meditation, contemplation and prayer you find meaning. You may be especially intuitive, even psychic, able to connect with higher dimensions and bring spiritual knowledge into others’ lives.

You may experience strong feeling of compassion for others, and so dedicate your life to service. You could be interested in working with the sick or needy. Or you may be drawn to some kind of therapy or counselling work. Learning when to give, and when to hold back, is essential.You must maintain appropriate boundaries for your own well-being. This can be a constant challenge. Your nature is to give from the depths of who you are, yet you must learn not to take this to an extreme Giving unconditionally is admirable, but giving yourself away is not. When you fail to maintain boundaries you open the door for others to take advantage of you, or to become seriously unwell.

The Urge to Escape.

Some of you may have trouble coping with your sensitivity and so, the realities of life. In this instance, you may become “the victim “ or the one who needs to be saved. Dealing with reality might be avoided, because you have unconsciously set up circumstances which require you to receive “special care”. There may be a subconscious belief that you are too vulnerable to cope, or that someone else should do it for you. You may deal with life by seeking a means of escape. In this case, escape can come through drugs, alcohol, illness and even madness. Or you may give up your individual autonomy by “flowing” with whatever is happening, allowing external events to control you. This can prevent from taking charge of your own life course.You may have a love of indulgence that joins easily with the desire to escape. Emotional extremes, impulses and addictions can take over if your ego boundaries are too loose, leading to all sorts of psychological disturbances.

Other people often provide the discrimination, caution and common sense that you need. Thus you do best with analytical types who can give a rational, no-nonsense assessment of any situation.

The Gift of Pisces Rising.

With Pisces rising you need to balance great compassion, creativity and sensitivity with the constant urge to escape. You seek liberation from your isolated self by merging with others. This may be a romantic ideal, a spiritual dream or a nihilistic vision with no future. Whatever the image is, your challenge is to learn how to manifest your many gifts, and at the same time, stay grounded on the earthly plane. You are a spiritual being living a physical life. Your mission is to make the most of it.