#the cycles of abuse...
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
"I feel safe with you"
#LOSING MY MIND OVER THIS SHOW#I've had to pause like every 5 minutes because something just completely floors me#the cycles of abuse...#sally and barrys relationship has always been so interesting and fucked up but now she knows what he's done#she was fucking there and she STILL FEELS SAFE WITH HIM#and now we've seen how her mum is and that adds even more layers to it#I can't express my thoughts coherently it's just. this show is so well written I can't#barry#barry hbo#in case the tags didn't make it clear I am not freaking out because I ship them 😭 I don't I'm just obsessed with how they've written sally#barry spoilers#I guess#my post
58 notes
·
View notes
Text
also worth noting that "abusive" doesn't actually mean "irredeemable" either.
there's a lot of people that have done things in the past that were bad, because they weren't taught any better, or they were in an overall toxic situation where EVERYONE was shitty (like a cult), or they were just at an especially low point and hurt others for it.
you don't have to forgive them. you don't have to ever speak to them again. you can be angry with them until you die if you want.
but society cannot function if we don't allow them to move on. to change their behavior and fuck off somewhere else and build meaningful relationships without bothering you again. we need a path for people to change, or nothing ever will.
#like re: the last post#npd SHOULDNT mean 'youre an abusive person'#but also people who have abused people in the past can still become better people in the present#you know?#and as i metioned vaguely in that post. the way we currently treat people with NPD probably CAUSES THEM to lash out at and abuse others#if u abuse someone they lash back out at you and suddenly theres fun mutual abuse happening#so they need a way out of that cycle
52K notes
·
View notes
Text
you've all heard of the abuse cycle (mori → dazai → ryuu → kyouka) and the savior chain (natsume → oda → dazai → atsushi → kyouka) now get ready for the unsaved trio (club)
watching people get saved and brought to the light while you're still in the dark and probably will always be there must be tough huh
(very honorable mention: kouyou! i added her in a reblog.) (she got very close to being saved, once. then it was taken from her.)
#bsd#bungo stray dogs#kyusaku yumeno#bsd Q#bsd yumeno#nakahara chuuya#chuuya nakahara#bsd chuuya#akutagawa ryuunosuke#ryuunosuke akutagawa#bsd ryuunosuke#unsaved trio bsd#bsd abuse cycle#bsd savior chain#abuse cycle bsd#savior chain bsd#bsd unsaved club#unsaved club bsd
4K notes
·
View notes
Text
hey . hey does anyone remember "This is the way I talk. I'm sorry your father never taught you the meaning of the word repugnant. He was too busy smashing your head against the wall of your trailer while you apologized for being alive." yeah that was fucking wild
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
going through my old journals as part of therapy homework and i'm reading a section written in the emotional wreckage of a full-on breakdown when i get hit with this line:
There is never a satisfying answer to ‘Why didn’t they love me?’
like wow babe. good fucking point
#like you were on the ground biting the carpet and dry sobbing while you wrote that and still. good fucking point#not a shitpost#cptsd#and it's true. there's never a satisfying answer#the truth is i know why i wasn't loved#i analyzed my parent's traumas and abuse to death. i understand why i alienated and was alienated from my siblings#i know why my mom was too overwhelmed to be capable of nurturing#i know why my dad vanished into addiction and avoidance#the details of our cycles of trauma and cptsd and family history i have a phd in all of it#i understood perfectly. i spent years studying and now i knew the answer#and guess what? IT WAS NOT SATISFYING!!!#because they still didn't love me! and i still couldn't change that!#it was still a completely unsatisfying state of affairs!#so like. when the people who are supposed to love you...don't.#when the people who are supposed to take care of you...fail to#you can look for answers and reasons and explanations#but that's not actually going to FIX your situation.#and it's probably not within your ability TO fix the situation. (and definitely not your job)#because you don't need answers--you need a new situation#*inserts Just Walk Out. You Can Leave!!! (Running Skeleton) Meme*#and yes. walking out isn't always possible.#but for you i hope it will be one day soon. and i hope you build the courage to take that leap.#stepping away from the people who failed to love you...it feels like being untethered but also like being lighter than air#new and scary. immensely relieving. the future opens up. empty but empty like a canvas. blindingly bright until your eyes adjust#like climbing out of a pit you called home and for the first time realizing how bright the light of day can truly be#when you aren't just getting glimpses from the bottom of a hole
10K notes
·
View notes
Text
LET YOUR DAD DIE: IT'S FINE IT'S FINE IT'S WHAT HE DID TO HIS DAD.
Lestat + Claudia: Patricide & The Cycles of Violence - INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE (2022) - Catherine Lacy, "Cut" (2019) / Anne Rice, "The Vampire Lestat" (1985) / Anne Rice, "Interview with the Vampire" (1976)
#iwtv#interview with the vampire#the vampire chronicles#lestat de lioncourt#claudia iwtv#claudia eparvier#claudia de pointe du lac#claudia de lioncourt#web weaving#i know there are 14929825 lestat/claudia comparative posts but i needed this one. for me.#does this make any sense outside of my head#like it's the cycles of violence and abuse and control (obviously)#but also lestat fantasizing/dreaming about killing his dad but not being able to in the end#she did something he always wanted to but never could and he respected her for it. he didn't have it in him but she DID#the lesdaughter of it all#also can we talk about how they both made louis finish the job agahajaj#evil of my evil
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
#relationships#unhealthy relationships#abuse#you deserve better#you matter#you deserve happiness#self compassion#breaking the cycle
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
something something white sheep luo binghe
#svsss#scum villain's self saving system#scumbag villain#luo binghe#or uhhh ig#luo bingge#scum villain#mxtx#fanart#digital art#my art#svsss fanart#chirin no suzu#ringing bell#this has prolly been done before but look at him...chirin lookin ass#something something cycles of abuse idk#anyway svsss enjoyers do not follow me cause i literally never talk/draw about it lol
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
So, in PIDW, there was obviously wife plots that could bring back the dead (mushroom body being one of them), and since we know Airplane is a hack that reuses concepts over and over, there’s probably multiple wife plots that could work, so like, where’s the PIDW fics where Liu Qingge somehow comes back to life, memories of Shen Jiu trying to save him intact, and goes to hunt the asshole down so he can repay his life debt, and along the way accidentally clears Shen Jiu’s name of all his crimes and now everyone is convinced Shen Qingqiu is a saint.
#I’m imagining this being around the time of the trial arc where lbh has sqq in the water prison and has probably already started his torture#maybe sqq is physically crippled after this or maybe lqg goes on a quest to get him a mushroom body either way it’ll be so much angst!!#sqq deserves to not be tortured okay?? because while child abuse isn’t okay neither is the cycle of abuse and also? I’m pretty sure other#peak lords treated their disciples worse you’re telling me lqg who apparently beat his disciples ritually every month or so was better??#ALSO? airplane is a confirmed hack and I don’t belive him when he’s the one telling use sqq is evil (he wrote the og book after all)#mxtx hell#mxtx fandom#liushen#liujiu#liu qingge#svsss shen jiu#original shen qingqiu#shen qingqiu#shen jiu#svsss shen qingqiu#svsss fandom#svsss#mxtx svsss#svsss au#sqq svsss#svsss fanfiction#svsss fic#svsss liu qingge#scumbag system#scum villain self saving system#danmei#pidw#proud immortal demon way#airplane shooting towards the sky
624 notes
·
View notes
Text
I don't know why Chad Charming being adopted is considered to be implausible by some. Cinderella, an orphan, choosing to adopt her firstborn to save him from a childhood like her own is the most in-character thing ever.
#“maybe he just took after his grandfather” be so fr#no because why is adoption so out of the realm of possibility for you guys#you may want to re-examine your own personal views and biases of traditional adoption#oh and may i also add all the complaints about ella letting chad and chloe become that spoilt#like its completely unusual for an abuse victim to overcompensate when breaking the cycle with their own kids#descendants#disney descendants#descendants rise of red#rise of red#chad descendants#chad charming#cinderella
674 notes
·
View notes
Text
consumed by the inevitable
#messyr#you know- I kept thinking: One day. The cage will be open but I feel like I'll stay. Because if I run- I'd wind up dead from their bullet#so I just- tend to- follow as much as I want to rebel and put sense into this fuckass household. I hate seeing the others in pain as well#and it hurts more that it feels like I can NEVER be the one to break this cycle of abuse- when I knew from the start- when I knew too much#but here I am ending up like the rest of them- helpless and unable to do jackshit about the situation. I cant say or do anything at all!#I dont want to end up like them- if anything I want to BREATHE- i want all of us to LIVE without this pain that has existed for generations#I want to help so bad no matter how much I know I am unloved.#no matter how much hate i carry- no matter how much burden- Underneath it all- I'm devoted to them- that's how fucked up I am#i know i'll never be enough. I know how often I think of death and wish it.#But I have a dream to achieve and I am not planning to die until I reach it. Not yet. If pain is where I strive best then so be it.#doodle#vent art#artists on tumblr#bpd#toxic behavior#learned helplessness
541 notes
·
View notes
Text
sally running home to her parents seeking safety and comfort only for her mother to dismiss her feelings and defend her abusive ex to her face, sally going back to barry and saying she feels safe with him, sally using gene's agressive methods on her own students etc...
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
Stolas gave Via what he didn't have in childhood
Agency
and unconditional love.
She was allowed to express her emotions.
And he even gave her her guitar; so when her things got too big to process she could do it through music too.
He made his love of music a gift for his daughter.
All this he sheltered from the goeita and from Stella in particula; so she'd have the breathing room to grow.
Giving her the strength to say no to her abusive family much easier. And even tell him to take hike.
He has definitely not always been perfect; but he raised a brave powerful girl, who knows she can choose.
#helluva boss#helluva boss spoilers#sinsmas helluva boss#octavia helluva boss#stolas helluva boss#Breaking the cycle of abuse
307 notes
·
View notes
Text
I wrote about Charlie and Dennis' paralleled childhood sexual abuse, and how their opposing trauma responses keep them from seeing themselves while they stay stuck in their own cycles of abuse.
// The content under the read more is an in-depth script analysis highlighting and discussing childhood sexual abuse and trauma response. Please read with caution or scroll past this post if these topics are known to affect and/or trigger you. //
Because Sunny walks an extremely fine line between sensitive, if not traumatic, character work and dark comedy, I've found that, in reading the scripts, the trauma being written is always much more blatant. You have to work a little harder to pick up on the underlying intent when watching the episodes (though the more and more we learn about the characters, the more the intent becomes clear), but the scripted versions of these scenes are solid evidence that the clear intent of these storylines is to reveal that these characters have extremely repressed childhood trauma, in-turn explaining to the audience why they have such fucked-up ideas of (and relationships with) love and sex. To put it more blatantly: the purpose of giving and revealing the childhood trauma these characters have is purposeful (if not needed), explaining why they are the predators that they are, and allows us to at least understand where their often psychopathic actions and rationales come from.
The fact that Charlie and Dennis were both sexually abused as children is all but obvious to the audience (and every other member of the Gang), but the extent to which these plots are intended to act as character work as opposed cheap-shot rape jokes is often lost on the casual viewer. In my opinion, the disconnect is not for lack of clear intention in the writing, but by the nature of the show being what it is.
It’s very clearly still there, easy enough to catch if you’re standing more than ankle-deep in the waters, but because Sunny is a dark comedy, it’s unfortunately easy to uncomfortably laugh past a rape joke if you don’t care to look deeper than the surface. Taking a look at the scripts helps paint a clearer picture, making it easier to point out, walk through and explore the CSA lore developed for both Charlie and Dennis, how they parallel and oppose each other, and how this trauma relates to their own predatory behaviours.
An obvious starting point is Charlie Got Molested, which is, on the surface, an episode in which we learn that Charlie wasn't molested. What is changed from the script to the episode is this first line from Charlie, right at the very end of the episode, on his family’s response to his alleged molestation:
(Charlie's aired line is instead "Now everybody thinks that I've been molested. So, in a way, my life is ruined.")
Whether written with a specific intent at the time or not, this episode sets the stage (literally, lol) for a later building 'reveal' that (1) Charlie was molested as a child, and (2) his Uncle Jack is very much a pedophile, not just a perv (which is hinted at in the actual episode, both in dialogue and visuals), because the next time the show features a plot with Charlie and molestation (Sweet Dee's Dating notwithstanding, though important to mention, as it’s further evidence of the idea that there was clearly a thread being woven early on), it’s via the form of a play.
Charlie wrote The Nightman Cometh as a play about love, which was turned into a 'legible' play by Artemis, in which the Gang all "misinterpreted" his original intent and believed it to be about a child being raped. Charlie gets mad, because he doesn't see it, doesn't believe it, and instead believes everyone is destroying his artistic vision by refusing to let this idea go.
The script for The Nightman Cometh (which, I’d like to point out, RCG chose to make publicly available to everyone) has an alternate ending to the rehearsal of the bed scene between The Boy and The Nightman:
(The aired version shows Charlie more-comedically angry at Mac and Dennis by raising his level of frustration, physically with his hands. The mention of the Nightman taking The Boy face-to-face is never addressed in the aired episode, yet it does take place that way in the actual play scene following the rehearsal featuring doggy-style humping.)
What's heavily implied in the episode (and basically explicitly stated in the script), is that the Gang are not misinterpreting Charlie's art; the play is quite literally built around the idea that a child is attempting to communicate his rape, and Dennis is telling him that’s what it is. Charlie can't accept that, because this is a play about his life, he believes he’s created a play about love, and he is the boy and he was not raped so it can't be rape.
(And, following this, the audience can put the two and two together: Charlie’s clearly repressed CSA and the fact that his Uncle is a pedophile. In every.single.physical.interaction Charlie and Uncle Jack have, in every appearance he makes following Season 4, the fact that Uncle Jack is the Nightman is clear.)
Rolling back a little, it’s interesting that Dennis is the one to be audibly confused by (and frustrated with) the fact that Charlie can't understand his play is a rape play, because it's so very obvious to Dennis. Yet, 7 years later, he's in Charlie's exact shoes.
Because in Dee Makes a Smut Film, Dennis' plot almost directly parallels Charlie’s from The Nightman Cometh:
Dennis wrote his Erotic Memoirs as a tale of his sexual conquests, the first of his encounters turned into a 'film' by Dee, in which Dee "misinterpreted" what happened between Dennis and the Librarian as him being raped as a teen. Dennis gets mad, because he doesn't see how it could possibly be rape, doesn't believe a guy can be raped, and instead believes Dee and Grieco are destroying his artistic vision by refusing to let the idea go.
(In the aired episode, Dennis does not avoid using the word rape, and instead insists you cannot rape a guy, and that he was willing.)
Just like Charlie, Dennis refuses to accept that the people who are acting out his writing at face-value are telling him straight up that it looks like, and most-likey is, rape. Dennis can't accept that, because this is a film about his life, it's about his first sexual conquest, and he is the boy and he was not raped so it can't be rape.
This goes one-step further when Dee airs the 'film' for the rest of the Gang:
(The aired version of the video does not show anything from filming, and only shows a slideshow of photos from when Dennis was a teen, overlay text claiming he was raped, and a photo of Klinsky repeating 'hoser' over and over.)
Dennis goes on a spiel and reiterates that he was not raped. The rest of the Gang are not convinced.
And at this point, Charlie and Dennis probably should relate to each other, or at the very least intentionally give each other a pass/miss whenever the topic of childhood sexual abuse emerges, but instead they continue to have no issue believing and pointing out that the other was raped while continuing to deny their own trauma.
In PTSDee, this paralleled-refusal is made clear. Very clear. In the script, it's even clearer:
(In the aired scene, Dennis' line is clearly cut after he mentions Charlie's mom, and it picks up with Charlie's line at "the father thing")
They see it so clearly in each other, but don't see themselves mirrored—and there's no doubt that's intentional. Because while they were both sexually abused as children, their current relationships with love and sex (as portrayed from basically episode one) are opposing, and the circumstances of their individual rape and immediate repression are extremely illustrative as to why they behave the way they do:
Charlie's trauma response is typical of pre-pubescent, forced rape. Not mature enough to even recognise what happened to him (as Uncle Jack's abuse was likely his first exposure to sexual acts), he regresses and represses, subsequently developing a repulsion toward sex into his adult life (in Season 5, Mac and Charlie Write a Movie, there's a deleted scene that makes it evident that he's disgusted by and avoidant of sex decades later), and, clearly by the depictions in The Nightman Cometh play and the lyrics of Nightman in Sweet Dee’s Dating, believing that the harassment he faced was love.
For the run of the show, Charlie’s interest in love and sex is almost exclusively highlighted by his relentless pursuit of the Waitress. In so far as the idea that every member of the Gang is a sexual predator, Charlie is depicted as a sexual harasser, unable to recognize that disinterest, avoidance, the word "no," and stalking that leads to legal action to restrain him from the person he's pursuing is inappropriate and predatory.
While his CSA results in a repulsion toward sex (in most instances), Charlie clearly associates the concept of love with the early harassment he faced, brought on him in his own home by a "loved one," he truly believes that his own relentless pursuit will end up buying him love. Charlie is stuck in an abstinent cycle (at least, until Dennis’ Double Life) of his own abuse.
Dennis' trauma response is typical of coercive rape and grooming. He was old enough to believe that sex is something that should be seen as cool, and therefore obsesses and brags about his experience(s), resulting in his hypersexuality. In Season 5, The D.E.N.N.I.S. System, it's firmly established that Dennis' pursuit of women is something outside of genuine attraction; in fact, it's almost devoid of it. Clearly by the plot of PTSDee, he sees a woman’s sexuality as a weapon he needs to fight against.
For the run of the show, Dennis' interest in sex is deeply entwined with the fact that he gets off on having power over his "sexual conquests". In so far as the idea that every member of the Gang is a sexual predator, Dennis is depicted as a date rapist, having an aversion to recognising (if not an inability to understand) consent, he pursues sex exclusively for his own physical pleasure, with little care for the other party, getting off on the knowledge that he’s orchestrated the situation he’s in.
While his CSA results in an obsession with sex, Dennis clearly does not associate the concept of love with the act, truly believing that sex is used to overpower someone, most enjoyable when obtained via coercion, exactly as his virginity was taken from him. Dennis is stuck in a loveless cycle of his own abuse.
Charlie and Dennis meet after their own traumas; their clearly disordered relationships with love and sex is how they've always known the other to be. When there are hints of the other's abuse, they're able to easy recognise what it is, for they sense the paralleled familiarity of their own CSA—yet their polar opposite trauma responses result in an inability to reflect:
To Dennis, Charlie was clearly raped, and Charlie fears sex and Dennis loves sex, so he can't have been raped; To Charlie, Dennis was clearly raped, and Dennis doesn't pursue love and Charlie loves the Waitress, so he can't have been raped.
Their reflections being mirrored causes them to harp on the other's trauma and keeps them from being able to truly recognise their own abuse. Call the other out and deny what’s shot back, stuff it down and continue spiralling in their own cycle of abuse.
#tw csa#tw rape#cycle of abuse#iasip#charlie kelly#dennis reynolds#script analysis#dennis meta#charlie meta#this is on the paddys pub blog under episode guides -> themes -> CSA#anyway penny for your thoughts as always#here or on the blog#comments on the blog are open to anonymous too just fyi#this is one of if not the heavier hitting sunny topics for me#so it's always swirling around in my mind#i could expand way further on this if i keep going#there's a lot. really. as im sure many people here know#this is just like. the down and dirty of it
173 notes
·
View notes
Text
try not to think too hard about the fact that your grandpa (the worst person you know) was literally exactly like you when he was 14 (pr/ship dni)
#rick and morty#rick sanchez#morty smith#im imagining a scenario in which morty meets young rick and hes like Ohhhhh i get it so its all over.#like idk. he already probably has some complex over not ending up like rick#but then seeing how similar they used to be hed probably start feeling like its inevitable#like obviously it isnt. but idk. could fuel some interesting character drama guys im just spitballin here!!!!#something about the cycle of abuse and seeing yourself in your abuser#my art
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
Hi,
JIN LING IS NOT HOW AN ABUSED CHILD BEHAVES. He sasses at JC and he KNOWS he's all bark no bite. The instances of JC hitting JL in canon are EXCEPTIONAL. If JC hit JL regularly, he would NOT have said "Not even my uncle hits me!" at WWX. That shit STICKS. You are all stupid
#jc#jiang cheng#jiang cheng positive#jin ling#jl#inspired by a jc anti that crossed my “for you” tab#also personal rant ahead:#my dad hit me TWICE and i only remember one of the times#admittedly i didn't see him regularly#but TWICE. and i only remember one of those instances#my stepdad didn't hit often but he yelled#and guess what?#the instances my dad hit me are insignificant to me#i remember being upset in the moment but barring that. zero. nada. and i love him#the yelling stuck to me like a leech#so yeah. abused kids don't sass at their abuser like that#abused kids don't use “not even my caregiver hits me!” as a gotcha#jl is not the healthiest#but considering all the baggage jgy and jc have#THEY DID A GREAT JOB#AND THEY DID BREAK THE CYCLE#jl bratting off to jc who never knew how to talk to jfm#jl being spoiled by jgy who was loathed by jgs#THEY WERE GOOD PARENTAL FIGURES#jin guangyao
258 notes
·
View notes